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r4izx · 2 months

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Worth more than what you take me for.

ayato x gn!reader

summary: in which he had to choose between two people including you, in a life and death situation.

disclaimers: swearing (there's like one lol), kidnapping, ooc traveler.

4,032 words and 21,895 characters.

a/n: dayum. this took a while and i did not expect to write this much.

you've known ayato since childhood. your parents has been serving their clan for generations, being one of their most trusted allies. and you're no exception.

growing up with people with high authorities was such a privilege. you remember when you first met lord ayato and lady ayaka. they both were very the same yet so different. so elegant, disciplined and was well mature for their age. you felt some kind of barrier between you and the siblings but they turned out just as kind as they look. they were easy to converse with. naturally, after some time of serving them, you would have gotten closer. and in fact, you did. although you thought, you and ayato's relationship was... rather special.

for some reason, ayato treats you very differently compared to others. not in a bad way. he often calls you to his workplace, make you sit there and drink tea with him. he takes you out to go eat dinner at uyuu restaurant when you both have finished work. he requested you to be his personal assistant while ayaka had thoma. and because of this, you get to spend more time with him than anyone else. at the beginning, you always thought ayato would be a cold and strict person. but it turns out to be quite the opposite. okay- maybe he is more quiet and colder than others, but that's towards other people. especially to those he only has business with.

ayato is surprisingly different to what you originally thought. he would try to match your humor, often speaking informally like the way you would around your closest friends just to match with you. lately he's been spending his free time with you too. he noticed you liked tea a lot, much like him. so both of you had made it a habit to have tea at the estate's balcony while the sun is going down. watching the sunset together. it felt really romantic for you- but you quickly shook your head and remembered that to him- you're just his work partner. but is that really the case for him? because he was much more observant than you thought. especially about you. he notices any slight change in the mood with you. so there was a particular day when you were gloomy because of being so tired. but he noticed this immediately.

"Shall we take a break?"

-- and you don't know why but your heart skipped a beat when he said that. you thought it was funny-- how he would do all of this for you. and at times like these, you start to feel like a special person to him. just because he always relies on you compared to others. you thought you were special to him. until she came.

who is she? she looks so... bold and pretty. just one look at her and you can already tell she has a strong personality but has a gentle aura. her blonde hair swaying so glamorously in the wind. her otherworldly clothes making her stand out among people. the way she moves makes it embarrassing to stand beside her. she seems so... perfect in everyone's eyes. unfortunately, that includes ayato's. you don't remember having a guest in ayato's schedule when you were fixing it, so why's she here?

you found out the answer really quickly. everyone at the estate has been talking about her and... ayato lately. you don't know why though, which is weird- because as his assistant you should be the first to know about things regarding him. it's even weirder that ayato had not summoned you after work has ended. 'is this where our afternoon tea sessions end?' you thought to yourself. so you found it upon yourself to just be straightforward and ask others what's the gossip all about. luckily, there was another servant nearby. she quickly leaned closer to you and whispered.

"h-haven't you heard?... it seems that lord ayato had taken a liking to lady ayaka's guest."

you were surprised. really. it wasn't even his guest yet he bothered to entertain her. just who is she?

"who-... who is her lady's guest?" you nervously questioned.

"I heard it was... the traveler? was it? lord ayato visited her personally! they're just so perfect with eachother!- i can't help it." the servant squeals in excitement, contrary to your look in horror. you try not to make it obvious though. but you shouldn't even be feeling this way. why does it hurt? there's a sharp feeling on your chest that you just can't get out of. it just hurts to know the reason why he stopped your afternoon tea sessions, dinner hangouts, or just even talking with eachother is because of another girl! you were in no place to get frustrated since you were just a servant. nothing more, nothing less. to him.

you only see him through work now. the urge to invite him to a tea break and have a conversation with him while watching the sunset is getting stronger everyday. and who are you to resist?

"lord ayato... wou-" before you could even finish your sentence, he stopped you. your heart was beating so fast. 'oh no. did I do something wrong?' thoughts like these were circling through your mind.

"i told you to just call me 'ayato' y/n"

--and he chuckles a bit at the end. and so do you. you felt so... relieved. your worries instantly washed away. you felt at ease knowing that you are special to him. i mean- he doesn't do this with others does he?

"ah- my bad... but as I was saying, would you like to have some afternoon tea break with me? I mean, we used to do that everyday but it has been a while since we last did soo..."

and at this point you were so sure he wouldn't decline. he's been less busy this week, what could he possibly do that's far too important to even refu-

"my apologies, y/n. i've already scheduled a tea break with someone else this afternoon. maybe next time if i have the time. i promise i'll make it up to you. however, you could accompany us if you would like." and your mind. empty. the world seems like it stopped for you. not only was your only time to hang out with him gone but you were also replaced. all this time... he was with someone else. you had a gut feeling of who that someone else might be. but you couldn't hold a grudge, you have no right to.

"i-... i look forward to it." nope. you absolutely don't, look forward to it. that day will eventually come though. you just didn't expect it to come, three days later. how quick. you were filled with mixed of different emotions. you hate to admit it- but... you are jealous of who this person might be. but at the same time you're glad to just see ayato again! sadly, for work. when he summoned you, you thought-- 'oh is this finally it? will we finally hang out together again?' until you realize it's just that you will just accompany him to go to a somewhat date with someone else. compared to you and ayato just drinking tea at the estate's balcony, he had prepared so much as to have tea and snacks at the shore. alas, you could finally meet this person. once again. as you realize it was her. the traveler.

"traveler, did you wait long? i'm sorry, you could've ju..."

and their conversation went deaf on your ears. the ayato kamisato. speaking informally, and giving out tea invitations to the traveler. when it used to be you... why are you feeling like this? isn't it obvious. the traveler is way prettier, stronger and better than you. comparing yourself to the traveler is already such an embarrassing thing to do. no one could compare to her. she's out there defeating monsters and fighting archons. while you're here holding a grudge on a person who doesn't even know you just because you're jealous you were easily replaced. but who were you to be replaced when you weren't even his to begin with. this is why you feel guilty. because you think that you have no right to feel this way. it's just now that you realize how much of an overthinker you are. however your thoughts were cut short when you hear ayato calling out your name.

"y/n, i'll go to to the comfort room for a bit. please entertain the traveler while i'm away."

he says.

"understood." and so you take a seat at ayato's chair before. and despite not wanting to have a talk with the traveler, it is still your duty and you would not abandon it for just some mere feelings.

"greetings, i'm y/n. it's a pleasure to meet you traveler." you bow slightly and give the smile you usually show to guests. a smile you practiced countless of times infront of a mirror. "you might have not heard about me though. so allow me t-"

"oh i know. you're ayato's personal assistant. he mentioned it to me before." the traveler states. and you were genuinely shocked but also... curious.

"is that so?... then, has he said any other things about me before?" you nervously asked. though the nervously part may not be obvious to others. the traveler sees right through this. and she giggles. but nods. "would you mind serving me some tea? the tea ayato has been serving me is delicious however i've tasted it countless of times from our past tea parties. so I would like to have a different flavor this time."

the word 'countless' implies that they have been doing this for a while now and you already know that. but it still stirs a feeling of jealousy inside you.

"of course. luckily i brought a different tea flavor for myself as well. let me go get the ingredients from my bag." you return after brewing the tea and pouring it into the cups. how thoughtful that the traveler had already prepared the cups for you.

"this tastes a lot like lavender... melon." the traveler says.

"hm. because it is. you have a great sense of taste." you reply. from this point and so on, you don't really know what to talk about. the atmosphere is really awkward. but you still try to strike up a conversation because she is a guest.

"s-so... what brings you here to the kamisato estate?" you ask. in which the traveler replied with "originally, ayaka invited me. and ayato next." you don't know if it's just your eyes playing tricks on you or did the corner of her mouth raise upwards for a bit. you brush it off. maybe the grudge you have on her is going too far. i mean, it's not like you hate her though. but it's also not like you like her.

by now you've almost finished your tea. same goes for the traveler. you only had to endure a little bit more of this atmosphere and her because ayato should be back soon. so you lowered your guard and relaxed a bit. this whole time you only stared at your teacup, but it wouldn't hurt to take a glimpse at the traveler right? so slowly but hesitantly, you lift your eyes up to see her. already staring at you. but you couldn't break away from the eye contact. especially because she just asked you something you're also asking yourself.

"y/n. tell me. do you like ayato?"

despite having a smile on her face as she asked this, her tone was rather cold. it sent shivers down your spine. you don't know why she's asking this. but you also don't know the answer to that question.

...do you like ayato?

"I'm..."

that was the last thing you said before you went unconscious. before that, your vision went blurry and your head was getting dizzy. how could this be? all the years you've spent serving the kamisato clan, this has never happened.

a loud ringing on your ears forced you to wake up, you could hear numerous voices as you slowly opened your eyes. your vision was still blurry but you could figure out that someone was huge was standing before you.

"it's awake."

'it's? what do these people take me for'. --is what you would have thought when you realized you've been kidnapped and the kidnappers are a group of nobushis. you look at your surroundings, counting just how many they are until you finally notice someone beside you. the traveler. she's still unconscious. looking at her made you realize that you're also tied up and is unable to speak. screaming is no use. you seem to be in a... cave? you're not so sure because you don't remember a cave this huge at inazuma. you try to recall what happened and why you ended up here until you heard something a nobushi said.

"ya think he's coming here?"

"i heard he fancies these two. of course he will."

he? who's he? considering they kidnapped you and the traveler, don't tell me they're talking about him. not lord aya--

"oh well look who's here."

your eyes widen in shock when you turn to the direction they're facing. he's standing right there. ayato kamisato has come to save you. ...and the traveler. something moves beside you and you see the traveler, already awake, with tears in her eyes. isn't the traveler supposed to be strong and mighty? you don't understand, how were they able to kidnap her. in what situation was she in for her to become so vulnerable and be captured? i mean before all of this she was only with you-- !! your eyes widen. you saw ayato, ...glaring at you.

why was he glaring? you were in a pitiful situation right now, yet he glares at you as if you commited a crime. you can't believe it but... 'don't tell me thinks... i poisoned the traveler.' archons. he definitely thinks just that. the way his eyes softens as he looks to the girl beside you confirms so.

"give us the document. maybe we'll let both of them go." one of the nobushis spoke up. documents? what documents are they talking about? you handle all the documents for ayato, could it be he's been keeping something from you? are they comparing lives to a piece of document? surely ayato would-

"no. ...who sent you?" his voice cold as ice. the world has been surprising you a lot today. how important could that document be for it to be able to compare to a person's life. "straightforward i see... too bad, if you don't give us the documents any time we'll kill both of your precious little friends and this place will blow up soon." one of the nobushis spoke up again, it was the same guy as earlier. normally, ayato would be able to beat a few nobushis on his own. but he's way outnumbered right now. for some reason he knows that you and the traveler was taken here, yet he still came alone. you look beside you and see that the traveler is now crying. compared to the mighty traveler you seem to be too calm. you shouldn't be, in a situation like this. is it because ayato is now here? although he probably hates your guts already. but you just trust him way too much.

"...not giving in eh? then let's see..."

the nobushi paused for a moment, seemingly thinking about another way to make ayato give in and for them to gain something out of him. the nobushi smirked.

"...if you give us some mora... we'll let ya choose one of them to go with. give us the documents, you all can go home safe and sound. give us none and... you'll die with them." and finally, you felt... fear. your heart was racing. you didn't know it was this bad. earlier you already knew that you're this close to death's door but you weren't panicking at all. you also don't mind dying if it was for ayato. from an early age you already knew that you had to serve and protect their clan no matter what-- even if you have to pay the price of your own life. so why panic now? is it because the nobushis are going to far with their negotiations? is it because you're knocking right at death's door? or maybe it's because you're afraid that ayato will abandon you. choosing someone else, right infront of you in a critical situation like this. but surely he wouldn't, right?

" ...traveler," he throws a pouch of mora to the ground towards the nobushis. you remember when you both were strolling around at inazuma city after dinner. when he mentions that ever since he saw you looking through the stalls but not buying anything, he figured he'd buy them for you. so he always carried a pouch of mora. for you... and not for anyone el-

".. let's go." what? are you hearing things right? but judging by the way they pull the traveler and untie her, it seems that you are. but you wish you weren't. it turns out he really would choose someone else. the traveler lunges to embrace ayato. seeing ayato slowly hug her back, patting her back to calm down her tears and letting her cry on his shoulder just made your broken heart break even further. you get it. with the traveler's back facing you as they embrace, you take a glimpse of ayato until his gaze lands on you.

" ...y/n..."

his tone was somewhat... soft. you assume on a lot of things and right now you don't wanna expect but, you are. is this his last words to me? is he telling me he's sorry? is he gonna tell me how he regrets doing this? and that he never really wanted this to happen? and that i'm someone special to him, viewing me more than just a serv-

" --how dare you."

...and his gaze turns dark. what for? you didn't even do anything. his eyes glares at you as if you both were never friends. or maybe you were never really a friend to him. and he always thought of you as a mere servant. just like the rest. you were just- too naive. so foolish. thinking you were special. special just because he went looking for you and bought medicine and special rare tea in a day when you were sick for work. special cause he always invited you for tea breaks, conversing with you and only you. special because he always relies on you, and you allowed yourself to be relied on, --when you had no one to rely on for yourself. was those years of being with him nothing for him? was it that worthless in his eyes? that you could just be replaced and abandoned any time? you thought you were someone special in his life when he treated you differently compared to others.

but what about the way you treat him?

you treat him as if you were nothing without him. because he was everything to you. you were only this happy with him. only him. if you think of the most memorable memory you've ever had, it would include him. the day you first met him, and today. the last day you're seeing ayato. you watch them slowly turn their heels to leave. and all of a sudden you spoke. you couldn't help it, you spoke without even thinking. and now you don't know what to say. or maybe-- you just don't want to say it.

"a-ayato..." 'did you ever think if me as more than a friend?'... heck- more than a worker even. you wanted to ask just that. but you wouldn't. cause you couldn't. "...thank you, but I did nothing wrong." you say as you smile. that was your final words before the traveler and ayato takes more steps towards another path, probably leading to the exit. you hesitantly and slowly lift your eyes up to take one. last. look to ayato and... the traveler. and last time your eyes were playing tricks on you, but now you realize it wasn't. cause she was smirking again. smirking at you. leaving you to death.

anger. shame. resentment.

fury rises inside of you. you were raised to be patient with others. it was your job. so you've never felt this way for someone before. you wanted to scream but you couldn't. all you could think about was the traveler.

...the traveler!! the traveler!! the traveler.

it was all because of her that you're in a state like this. ever since she came, things changed. she was the person ayato replaced you with. the person he chose to spend the rest of his life with. and the reason why he threw away all of his memories with you and treated you like nothing. he chose a girl he just met instead of a childhood friend companion who has done nothing but pledge loyalty to him. now that you think about it... for ayato you would risk your life for him, die for him even. but he wouldn't do that for you. he only showed up for the traveler when you thought he came to save you.

it felt like your world was crumbling right before your eyes, watching them walk away, leaving you to death. you could mean that literally since anytime now you might be reduced to nothing but also... ayato is your world. to you he is everything. growing up with him, growing with him. he really is that special to you.

too bad,

he doesn't even see you as anything more than a servant. to him you were, not. special. at. all.

their footsteps has slowly faded away. they left. they've left you. behind, to die. it seems... this is it. you hear the nobushis chuckling and talking amongst eachother,

"geez... what a show! anyway.., are the preparations complete?"

"really? then we could go!"

"where did she say we would meet her again?"

"that bitch... making us do all of this. if it weren't for the mora then I wouldn't have agreed."

her? who's her? who's she? these thoughts seem all too familiar, and once again, you got your answer quickly.

"oh the traveler asked us to meet her at jinren island." a nobushi replied. just when you thought your hatred for her couldn't get any worse. however your thoughts were completely cut off when the nobushis all started leaving you. not even batting a single eye. you remembered them mentioning something that would leave you to ashes here. what was it again? if you recall quickly it was probably a-- "a bomb," --a nobushi says to you. as if he could read your mind. "a few minutes from now, once we all leave, this place will get wrecked. including... you." the nobushi laughs. you have never been this lonely before. i mean, you always had ayato beside you. but now that he personally left you for someone else- who do you have now? you have no answer for that. or maybe it is the answer. nothing. no one is there to help you. your reason to live is gone. atleast, you served your life's purpose before you die. you were never really that close to others including your family because of ayato. so you have nothing to lose now. but... you wish you could atleast take revenge on the traveler... even though you hate that idea. revenge isn't something you would even consider but.. the traveler is a different case.

today has given you particularly a lot of last things. like your last thoughts just now. before feeling a strong burst of energy and the brightest light you've ever seen. and everything turns dark.

...your eyes are closed and you can't move your body. but you're hearing something... footsteps? oh, a voice.

" ...how pitiful,"

you fall into deep sleep once again after feeling such an electrifying strike on your back.

... just who was that?

#genshin impact #genshin fanfic #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin x you #ayato x reader #ayato x you #ayato x y/n #kamisato ayato x reader #kamisato ayato x you #genshin angst #rai! ✍️#genshin one shot #genshin oneshots

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janesgms · 6 months

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Plutonian Women

(and unraveling their destiny)

This post can be quite messy because I only wanted to share my thoughts on this topic. Do not take all of this as my absolute truth because these are things that I've thought for quite a while seeing it in my life and personally too.

Something I've realized lately is that Plutonian Women go through unique situations that set them apart from other people. And in this case, I'm refering to women only and not men because this is based on my experience, and you all know that energies manifest differently according to the gender so I'm not gonna afirm this also apply to men when I haven't seen it in my world, also, as we are tired of seeing, women are treated differently from men in our society so we cope with things differently.

Firstly, I wanted to talk about placements that make a woman Plutonian in my opinion (when I say "Plutonian", I mean someone who is heavily affected by Pluto in their natal chart), but you can relate to this post whether you have some of these aspects or not, so share your experiences with me, I'd love to know!

🔮 1H/5H/8H/10H Pluto.

🔮 0° Pluto.

🔮 Pluto in water degrees (bonus points if there are aspected placements who are also in water degrees).

🔮 Pluto aspecting big 6 (specially harsh aspects: conjunction, opposition, square, contra-parallel / also specially the luminaries - sun, moon - and mars).

🔮 Pluto in the same personal planets/asc.

🔮 Pluto aspects to outer planets in case it's also aspecting big 6.

🔮 I think Pluto aspect BM Lilith/Chiron can also play a part in this.

🔮 Scorpio Pluto if it's conjuncting or heavily aspecting other placements.

What distincts a Plutonian Woman from the rest is their gravitational energy that pulls you in like a black hole, and as intensely as one. Their eyes hold a shadow of their past traumas and occasions but with a touch of mystery that makes you wonder what they went through in their lives. Their stare is heavy and filled with emotions (let's not forget Pluto still rules a water sign).

I don't like to condemn people for their placements, but I think Plutonian Women came to this life to suffer a lot before gaining what they want and deserve, and this seemingly infinite cycle of pain will only end when they learn how to cope healthily with things of life. One of the reasons why they go through so much is their way of seeing and feeling. Plutonian Women feel things in almost a transcendental way, they feel intensely and with this, they can put themselves through "unnecessary" situations when not careful. They're also prone to self destructive behavior, their heart usually puts a dark veil in their thoughts when their emotions come crashing in like a hurricane. Their pain is the embodiment of "female rage", when they cry hard, it's a mix of anger, sadness, sorrow and everything that they were holding back from a while - because they do hold emotions - but they can't run away from their deepest parts, and one day everything overflows and they can finally reborn from that suffering; the music "Pretty When You Cry" describes them perfectly, because they're indeed pretty when they cry and crying frees them in a way, and a lot of people actually like to seem them suffer? Plutonian Women attract questionable men or women (romantically), because they're almost like a beautiful show to watch, and these men/women like them best when they're falling apart, but manipulation can arise and fool them (they should be careful with 12H synastry specifically, the apparently good ones can actually be the wolf in sheep's clothes).

But back to the way Plutonian Women perceive the world, they are actually fragile at heart, but they try to hide it at all costs, they have a pure heart who could be derranged due to childhood/romantic/any other issues but who has no bad intentions most of the times. I think of them as victims of situations they have no control of since young.

However, to be more positive, I'd like to say that this is not a death sentence at all. Indeed, death is the right word to describe Plutonian Women because they die all the time (figuratively speaking, but literal death can be very present in their life too) and they are reborn as better people. Unfortunately, justice or karma is not much on their side because the world can be a place very unfair most of the times, but I think this is due the fact that they souldn't focus on revenge or negative thoughts, even though they can do it a lot as a way of thinking as a "justice". But the message they should learn is that they should focus on getting better, prettier, wiser, smarter instead of losing energy thinking on lower vibrational people.

The truth is that Plutonian Women are the defintion of a a Phoenix, if you do them wrong, you can be sure that they will gain their dignity back and get back stronger than ever, even with a "fragile" heart as I said, they have a malicious mind that protects this side of them; and also, once they apparently heal their deepest and oldest wounds, it gets harder and harder to break their shell, but if you were capable of doing so, just know that you opened all of them and made the Plutonian suffer all again and go to hell and back.

Overall, the word that describes them best is "raw" because this is what they truly are (in the best way possible lol). Due to this, they can attract a lot of hate - similar to lilith women and specially if they are also lilith "dominant" - from people who don't understand their beauty or actions, because their beauty is truly sharp, hypnotizing, dark and undescribable, furthermore, their actions are particularly unique and most of the times hide their intentions, they never do something significant without thinking first. They ultimstely search for what's beyond the surface, when in love, they wanna know your soul and more, they despise flings, they wanna get to know the depths of their s/o's being, they love hard but also get heartbroken hard when it happens. Academically, they like to be strategic and hardworking when they see it's worth the work, they can be perfectionist because they're hard on themselves most of the times. So, afterall, what's their destiny? Their destiny is to feel accepted and comfortable in their own skin, to get over their traumas and allowing themselves to be better, to let go of toxic people and surroundings, to not engage in toxic relationships anymore, to free themselves from karmic debts and to be finally happy.

Plutonian Women probably feel a deep connection with spirituality, astrology, pstchology, crying, darkness, mystery, the unknown, black/red/purple/dark blue, sad and profound songs, the night, dark places in general, mourning, wakes, death celebrations, soul level bonds and conversations.

Plutonian Women are masterpieces who deserve more from the world and people, they've gone through a lot and they should be 100% respected, sending a lot of love to all of you ❤️‍🔥

Hey guyssss, I missed posting actual posts here but I wasn't feeling inspired lately. But I'm back!!! I hope you guys understand my point of view and I typed this with all my heart because I was based on my personal experiences and people around me's experiences. I was thinking in also making a post about Lilith Women since I also have a lot to say about that either ! Thanks for the support and see you later or sooner 💋 Also in case you noticed I didn't focused in scorpio placements here because I think they work differently (I just don't know how to explain this difference tbh, so I focused on actual Pluto)

#astrology #astro observations #astro notes #astro community #pluto #plutonian #pluto placements

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thehusbandoden · 9 months

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You Flinch During an Argument -Todoroki Shoto

Sooo I decided to change this into drabbles instead of headcannons and a drabble bc I'm a lot more comfortable writing in this format, sorry if this bothers anyone <33

Oh and this is a lot more fluffy bc I'm so soft for Sho <3

I'll make Bakugou's a lot more angsty tomorrow >:))

Angst to fluff/comfort | 1,057 words

Warnings!: Mention of arguing, flinching, fear of hurting/scaring your s/o, mention of abuse (Shoto's childhood), and spending money in copious amounts (is that a warning??). Pls let me know if I miss any <33

The argument was getting nowhere, you were exhausted, angry, and hurt. You also bet that Sho felt the same.

Sighing, you stand up and walk towards where Shoto was pacing around.

"Listen Sho, let's just go to bed, we can talk about this in the morning."

"Fine then, you go to be-" Shoto froze as he saw you flinch away from him, he wasn't going to.. hurt you. He would never hurt you.

"Did.. did you think I was going to hurt you?" Shoto asked, inwardly panicking as he rushed to your side, hands hovering over your arms, shoulders, and hands, too scared of hurting or scaring you to touch you.

"No baby no. It was some kinda reaction from my body, probably because the tension was high and we're heroes." You coo, grabbing Shoto's hands comfortingly.

"A-are you sure?" Shoto asked, body shaking as he moved his hands up and down your arms, trying to comfort you as best as he could.

"Positive my dear, lets just get to bed, yeah? We can talk about our.. disagreement in the morning." You smile, causing Shoto to nod as he followed you to your shared bedroom, hovering behind you as you go through your night time routine.

"Baby.. I promise I'm not scared of you." You whisper, turning around to hug Shoto as he hovered over your shoulder, heart broken.

"I- I know.. it just reminded me of mom.. and him.."

"Oh baby, no. That is completely different."

Hugging Shoto tighter, your heart partially broke as Shoto clung to you, burying his face in your neck, seeking any kind of comfort he could.

"T-this was a one time freak accident.. right?" Shoto asked, a few tears staining your shoulder as he let you comfort him, needing some kind of stability for him to be sane.

"Yes, yes this will only happen this one time. I was not scared of you, my body moved on its own, I hold zero fear towards you, my love."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Now, let's get to bed and cuddle, yeah?"

Shoto simply nodded, shuffling his feet in a way where he could move yet stay attached to you, and he completely climbed on top of you, burying his face into your chest as you played with his hair, kissing his forehead sweetly.

~~~

The next morning he was attached to you until you had to go to work, and even then he was very reluctant to let you go, asking for kiss after kiss as you attempted to leave.

You came home to a completely cleaned house, your favorite meal, and your favorite at home activity set up.

And the next day, after he came home from work he brought you flowers, your favorite treat, take out, a movie, and a book that's been rotting in your 'tbr' list on Amazon.

It stayed that way for at least a week and a half, Shoto doing everything he could to show you how much he truly loved you.

~~~

"Baby I'm home." Shoto calls, shutting the door with his foot as he moved to set todays findings on your kitchen island.

"Hey, you're home early!" You smile, quickly making your way to kiss Sho's lips before hugging him, smiling at the comforting warmth and smell.

"Yeah, I missed you too much and there wasn't much going on. If there's any thing they need my help with they'll simply call me in."

Pecking his chest as acknowledgment, you turn to the island, blushing in embarrassment at the multiple bags on the smooth surface.

"Sho, how many times do I need to tell you that you don't need to keep buying me things?" You sigh, smiling as the hero pecked the back of your ear to help you cool off.

"And how many times do I need to tell you that I know I don't 'need' to, but I can, and want to spoil my queen."

"Sho you're too good for this world." You huff, blushing at Shoto's bold honesty.

"I belive that is you, my love."

"Okay okay- what did you get this time?" You sigh, peering at the bags curiously.

"You have to wait for this one," Sho mused, picking out a small black bag from the bunch, maneuvering it so you wouldn't see the brand name.

"Ah c'mon Sh-"

"and this one is for dinner-" Sho continued, shushing you with a quick peck to the lips, setting the grocery bag aside.

" and the rest is for you to enjoy at your leisure." Shoto smiled, causing you to blush.

Smiling, you look through the remaining four bags, smile widening at the sentimental gifts Shoto had gotten you.

One bag was full of books and movies you were dying to read/watch, and another one was full of bags of sweets you enjoyed from the gas station near your house -which means he most likely grabbed them on a whim, barely putting a thought into spoiling you as he remembered all of your favorites and which one you liked the most.

The other two were full of some of your favorite hobbies, and things you were meaning to get. Needed a new pair of earphones for long hours of patrol? Sho got the new model, making sure to get your favorite color. Oh- did you want a pair of fuzzy socks for the upcoming winter? Shoto got you just that, spending extra money to make them just right for you. The list went on and on, causing you to both feel giddy and annoyed.

"Shoto, you can't just spoil me. You need to be spoiled too, and all of your money is going into this isn't it?" Giving Sho a look to stop him from interrupting, you continued, "but, I really do appreciate this. You're too sweet for this world, Sho."

Shoto just smiled at you, eyes holding a certain spark that made you giddy.

And that alone stopped you from telling him to stop.

Because he truly enjoyed spoiling you, and you won't be that one to dampen that light, you'll be the one to continue to let it grow.

Plus you started spoiling him too- and now it's basically part of your routine

Series' masterlist | Shoto's masterlist | Main masterlist | Navigation

Tips <3

Reblogs help spread and support my work, and therefore help me out a ton, but any support is appreciated <33

Do not copy, repost, nor plagiarize my work. Ask before you translate or use my work in any way, minus reblogging.

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fragileheartbeats · 1 month

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"your a woman, you supposed to take Rhaenyra's side!!"

My dude, why would you discriminate for her just because she's a woman? You guys just go blind because she's a woman. You're the one who give her a pass because she's a woman.

I never understood these feminist fight.

Feminism is about equality, but nothing was equal between Aegon and Rhaenyra.

Their childhood and adolescence were different like the earth and the sky. Their age, their marriage, the way others treated them and in short everything about them was unequal.

When reading F&B I didn't care much for Aegon when he was introduced as this lazy, unambitious sot. But as the war progressed I couldn't help but notice his resilience, courage and intelligence and root for him.

Look at what Aegon was like in the earlier parts of F&B. He drank a lot, groped and pinched serving girls, potentially fathered multiple unacknowledged bastards, and was an all-round dick. He wasn’t as fierce as Aemond, as courteous as Daeron, or as gentle as Helaena. He started a fight at the family feast when Jace offered a dance to Helaena (the same wife whom he was serially unfaithful to). While the Greens launched their coup, he was at some degenerate “revels”. When Aemond murdered 13-year-old Luke, he threw a celebration and called it “a good start.”

But after the Dance’s actual battles began, Aegon really lived up to his title! He had Criston Cole capture Duskendale and Rook’s Rest, and then fought on Sunfyre to take out Rhaenys when she fell for the bait. Despite his crippling injuries, he survived. Even after his sons were butchered and King’s Landing fell, he fought on. Aegon and Sunfyre recovered on Dragonstone, with Sunfyre killing Grey Ghost along the way. Then Aegon and his forces took the castle under the Blacks’ noses. He and Sunfyre won yet another dragon battle against Baela. And again Aegon clings onto life in the face of crippling injuries. Then he traps and kills Rhaenyra while uttering a fantastic line "Rhaenyra: My lords will find me. Aegon: If they search the seven hells mayhaps." He returns to KL as King. The various self-proclaimed monarchs and the Shepherd are promptly defeated. It is a hell of a comeback considering Aegon’s state when he left the capital.

It's remarkable how quickly he grows into his role as king and how devoted to his cause he becomes by the end. He is determined to reclaim his father's throne, to restore order to kings landing by putting down the rebellion and punishing the insurgents, make peace with his enemies, he already plans to marry a Baratheon girl not for love but for duty to get an heir again. From the irresponsible, lazy drunk he supposedly was you would expect him to be vain, selfish and hedonistic, someone who only pursues his own pleasure and expects others to do the hard work, but no the hardships and responsibilities shaped him into someone who takes duty seriously. Even though prone to make rash, and imprudent decisions he also had the favourable quality to listen to the counsel of wiser and more experienced people around him and nearly always follows their advice. I think towards the end of the Dance it's painfully clear he is a better ruler than Rhaenyra.

Aegon had a 13 to 4 dragon disadvantage and a 53 to 28 House disadvantage, does this seems equal to you? Yet he still won (now if you wanna tell me "But Rhaenyra's lineage continued" pls shut your mouth because we are talking about the winner of war and the win you guys are so proud of is a fucking joke)

It’s hard for me to call him a bad King because he was given the worst situation of any King in Westerosi history with a civil war where you’re at a disadvantage starting out. The Greens should’ve been steamrolled but thanks to Aegon resiliency and Rhaenyra’s incompetent they weren’t.

People show you who they really are when they are tested and things are not going their way. Rhaenyra was tested and failed to rise to the occasion every single time. I find Rhaenyra utterly, utterly pathetic, without any redeeming quality as a ruler, as a person, as a woman.

By marrying and having kids with Daemon, she pretty much guaranteed a three-way civil war between Daemon's sons, her bastards, and her brothers the minute she dropped dead. So it doesn't matter if it was Aegon who sat on iron throne, this war was supposed to happen.

We saw Rhaenyra rule. She was a disaster. A ruler who puts their selfish desires above duty will always be a disaster. That's what Rhaenyra was: a selfish entitled person who didn't give a fuck about anyone other than herself. It's a miracle she had such decent kids.

Rhaenyra had a better council. The Sea Snake was wealthy and powerful, Rhaenys was beloved by many and respected as well. Meanwhile, Aegon's advisors were mostly Hightower cronies and quite a few were motivated mostly to spite Rhaenyra. Yet she fucked that up.

Rhaenyra literally was kicked out of the throne because people were tired of her reign, no one had this opposition besides Maegor.

People also like to excuse her cruelty and stupidity during her brief reign as a queen because she lost her children during the war. But Rhaenyra was a selfish entitled person long before she became queen or lost any of her kids. She wanted Aemond, who was just a boy, punished for calling her boys bastards, which they were. She murdered and advocated torture to keep up the lie. Let's not forget how she murdered Vaemond Velaryon for speaking up against Lucerys inheriting Driftmark ahead of trueborn Velaryons.

Or how she ignored the entire reason she was made heir by marrying Daemon anyway when she was made heir to keep that psychopath from the throne. All these things happened before Rhaenyra lost any of her children or got usurped. The losses didn't change her. They just worsened what she already was.

She ordered daily executions, established "knights inquisitors" to hunt down innocent children, would not offer peace terms, imposed ridiculous taxes while throwing a lavish birthday party for her son, and then tried to have her allies murdered.

She is insanely selfish - am I the only one who thinks she's a very very scary narcissist? Never in the whole course of her life has she had a single concern about others - it's always about herself, her children who she sees as an extension of herself. Even the great narcissist Cersei has shown some small sympathy towards Sansa when she was engaged to Joffrey. She never even bothered to visit or care for her father, instead she was chilling with her creepy uncle on Dragonstone.

She uses and manipulates, and tramples over others and treats her allies like absolute garbage. Corlys Velaryon was first grandcucked, then got his son murdered either by her or her husband, then got his granddaughters deprived of their birthrights and betrothed to bastards. Yet for some reason still supports his great abuser. What did he get in return? Being thrown in the black cells for trying to save the life of his innocent and loyal bastard son.

She inspires zero loyalty and devotion from either her people or the nobles. She insults important nobles who have never offended her, doesn't make alliances, calls the small folk scum and taxes them to death. No wonder they call her Queen Maegor and threw her out of the city. She doesn't make one single selfless and smart political decision. The Vale and the North might have supported her on paper - they hardly did anything until the war was almost over - she had no real allies except some semi-god Rivermen who were scared into supporting her by Daemon.

She is an utter coward and liar. Her youngest son and teenage stepdaughter both took to dragon back before her, as she hid like a coward and sent others to die for her. She took it for granted that others should die for her ungrateful and pathetic cause. She gaslights others into lying about her bastards' parentage and maims/executes everyone who disagrees.

She is a cruel, stupid and atrocious ruler with zero redeeming quality. She filled her council with idiots like Bartimus Celtigar and some Kingsguard/Commander who don't know a single thing about ruling. She listened to the counsel of that child-murderer Mysaria. She never made allies or made sensible political decisions. Her eldest son Jace has ten times her diplomatic skills.

She was extremely cruel during her short reign as Queen. She beheaded people daily, filled the city with terror, imposed crazy taxes including taxes on bastards, imprisoned any dissenters, made people pay to watch executions, threw a feast while people starved and resulted in all the dragons being killed.

She never defends the rights of other women, she thinks she is the special exception to the patriarchy. Just ask Lord Rosby's daughter. She usurps her stepdaughter's birthright in favor of her bastards.

She fully deserved her fate, because she spent her whole life avoiding duty and responsibility, using, abusing and manipulating those closest to her, ruled like a tyrant and led to the extinction of her dynasty.

Tell me one positive quality of this utter failure of a Targaryen has and I will refute you.

Aegon suffered much more than Rhaenyra but he didn't give up, all these events only made him grow and become stronger unlike Rhaenyra who fucked everything up and got worse day by day. He lived in real world and knows if he don't fight for himself no one gonna do that, but Rhaenyra was still on her I'm my daddy's princess so I do whatever the fuck that I want era. like a leech, Rhaenyra relied on others to survive, she was delulu. Oh did I mention she sold her crown and ran away like a coward? Did I mention Aegon had to clean the mess that she made?

And did you guys noticed almost all the rulers after Aegon II are mad, stupid, useless, coward? Just like Rhaenyra.

Now you can disagrees with me, that's ok but don't even try to fight with me about her or try to change my mind because it's not gonna work. Idk about you but I don't want my feminist icon to be someone like Rhaenyra.

Oh and if you wanna use "but Aegon was a rapist" card go read the fucking book or this post.

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luveline · 8 months

Note

hiii!! i saw that you wanted some roan & eddie & reader requests sooo,, becuase barbie is trending so muchh i was wondering if you could write reader watching roan play with her barbies and instantly taken back to her childhood and getting very emotional ??

i mean its whats happening to me being reminded how much ive grown and how much effect those dolls had on me soo yeah 😭

tysm ♡ eddie and roan

A long, creaking squeal sounds from Roan when you come home. Eddie plugs his ears, knowing exactly what it is you have in the huge plastic bag at your waist —Roan's special treats, as previously discussed, for being such a lovely girl lately.

It might be a silly thing to treat her for, but she deserves toys before any amazing behaviour, and you have the extra money to buy them. Why shouldn't she get them? You and Eddie chatted some while you were at work that morning, trying to choose what toys to get.

"I haven't bought her toys by myself since we first met, what if I pick something crappy?" you'd worried.

Eddie gave it a little bit of thought, hand twined in the curling wire of the telephone, slouched as he usually does against the back wall of the shop. "Hey, she hasn't had any new dolls since Christmas. They'd go over nicely. Or she always likes a new dress. I'm sure you'll find something when you're there. You can get me something fun at the same time if you want."

You'd laughed at his joke and, if the light in your eyes now is anything to go off of, managed to find some presents you're happy with.

"Naddy's Toy Emporium!?" Roan shouts, rocketing off of the couch where she'd been standing waiting for you.

You've a nightly routine, hugging her when you come home like your life depends on it, but clearly Roan has decided the hug can wait. For once, Eddie's finished dinner before you're return, so he has a good seat on the couch to watch everything unfold.

You let her grab the bag's sides but lift it a touch when she tries to take it. "Hey, they're for you, I promise, but let's come inside and put them on the table!"

Roan squeals and knocks into Eddie's knees. He sits up and grabs her gently by the waist, hoisting her onto his lap. You sit on the couch cushion trampled flat by Roan's feet, pulling the play table where she likes to eat her snacks closer.

"Are you doing the speech?" you ask Eddie, putting down the bag.

He grins. "Ro," he begins, turning skewiff, her back to the couch to allow you both a great view of her face, "you've been a really good girl, lately. Do you know that? You've been eating all your dinner, no tantrums before school, and now you're even starting to help clean up around the house. So me and Y/N just want you to know how proud we are and how awesome we think you are."

"And we think all this awesome deserves some presents because we love you," you say. "Do you want the smallest or the biggest one first?"

There's lots of nice presents. You've stayed within the confines of the agreed budget, which is a feat for you (as you love to spoil her). There's five new barbies, one of which comes with a car, and the other a puppy dog. They have clothes, accessories, and an abundance of plastic he needs to cut away with scissors. His hand is welted red by the time he's through.

You also bought her a glittery lip gloss to replace the one she lost a few weeks ago. The proof of it sparkles on your cheek and Eddie's, twin thank yous.

You go quiet as Roan retreats to her satin princess tent, driving the pink corvette back and forth as she makes the barbies talk to one another.

"You okay?" he asks. You'd been wearing this huge smile for the last twenty minutes and now it's gone, he hates it. "I've been thinking maybe you deserve something nice, too."

You smile weakly. Okay, so you're not wanting anything.

"Dinner should be ready soon."

"Thanks, Eddie."

He gives up. He's about as subtle as a feather boa and you love him that way, drifting down toward your arm, his face smashing into your shoulder. "What's wrong?"

You put your head atop his. "Well, I'm just thinking."

"I may not look like it, but I think too, occasionally. Share with me."

You push his arm until he sits up and sinks down into his side instead. Eddie supposes you're allowed, even if usually he'd call it sexist or selfish. "I had a lot of fun picking those out today, and I kept thinking about the look on her face…"

Eddie hums to show he's listening. Kisses the top of your head 'cos he can. "Yeah?"

"I just remembered being her age. Do you remember wanting something really badly? There was something so nice about getting to grab a kart and– and to just stand there debating which ones to get."

Eddie toys with your pinky finger. "That's not everything, is it?"

Your smile presses against his arm, a deep emotion in your voice that's hard to pin. "Watching her makes me remember. Being a kid, playing make believe. I'll never be that young ever again, and there's no way to go back. But I," —you take in a steadying breath— "don't mind. I love seeing her so happy."

He intertwines your fingers between his, shorter and a little bit softer than his. He soaks in your presence for a moment, the smell of you, your tiny sounds, the secret you've shared with him. You're a mixture of sad and happy. He's not sure which one overpowers which, only that they're hitting you hard.

"There's lots of cool shit that comes with being a parent. You know the best one?" he asks you, raising his eyebrows at you with a fondness lining his lips.

"No?"

"You can play games without anyone judging you. I know it's not the same as being a kid again, but it's close."

"Yeah?" you ask, sitting up. "You'll come play too, right?"

Eddie casts his gaze to his daughter where she chit chats on the floor. "Hey, Roanie? Can we come play with you?"

Roan is almost as pleased as when she first laid eyes on her treasure trove of dolls.

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cenorii · 20 days

Text

Wesker: personality

This is my psychological analysis of the character, which includes important details of the story, an analysis of the decisions they made and the concept of the phenomenon of «Guiding Fear». Contains spoilers!

Even if you know lore 100%, you will be able to learn something new from my thoughts

I did this to practice analyzing personalities and reliably prescribe my own characters.

[These are all my personal reflections that I have been accumulating and analyzing for six months. You can see the same analysis with Chris here. In Wesker's case, I dispel the myths that he is evil-evil and crazy, it's not that trivial here... Thanks to everyone who reads this, I really appreciate it and it's nice to know that my thoughts are of interest to someone!]

The most difficult subject of all. An attempt to embrace the immensity. He is infantile and the desire to prove this quality forced me to write such a huge article.

Wesker embodies the fear of losing himself, the anxiety of being someone he is not. He knows nothing about himself from the beginning, neither his Spencer-prescribed destiny nor his real name. As he tries to resist and exercise his individuality, he is eventually confronted with the truth that his every move has been pre-planned, never answering the questions: where are his own decisions? Where is he himself? What is really his?

I chose this fear for Wesker for a reason. The fear of losing himself can cause a person to purposely distance himself from others and not allow anyone to get close to him. He strives to shield himself from everyone, and we can observe this in his desire to be alone. Outwardly, such a person may appear indifferent and cold, even indifferent, so as not to give away to others (and to himself) his true feelings and needs. Wesker believes that it is right not to show anyone that something matters to him, otherwise he will develop weaknesses. After all, what people hold dear can be manipulated. And he doesn't want anyone to have control over him. He hates being controlled, so his surroundings know the bare minimum of information about him.

Who's Spencer? One of the founders of Umbrella, to put it succinctly. A man who is obsessed with identical mansions and mysteries and immortality and creating «perfect humanity». Rich and powerful.

But let's get to Wesker's story. A lot of things happened to him in his 48 years of life.

First of all, I want to point out that at an early age he was taken from a family that Spencer believed had a unique combination of intelligence and genes. But he wasn't the only one who was treated this way as part of «project W» (the experiment to create the perfect human). There were hundreds of children who were later given the surname Wesker. Until their adulthood, they received the best education, living in a boarding school (presumably), and were selected to be the best.

The children, being a blank slate, absorbed Spencer's teaching, being brought up according to his ideals. Their lives were pre-scripted, every step of the way. Those who were unremarkable were weeded out. Competition, anxiety. The lack of a normal childhood could breed a fear of losing oneself in every Wesker, for life was controlled. Personal boundaries and choices were absent, Spencer's worldview was pounded into everyone's head. Children were also distorted with notions of right and wrong, forced to be emotionally detached from a non-ideal world. This upbringing has produced people who have no empathy for others, empty machines with no personality of their own, ready to perform perfectly in any job in which they find themselves successful. They see the world through Spencer's eyes, but not their own.

In the end the best were 13 people, where number 12 was Alex Wesker and number 13 was Albert, the one in question. Someone who really always wanted to see the world with his own eyes, wanted to transcend.

The 13 candidates, following Spencer's plan, had to mature before moving on to the final stage of project W - injecting themselves with a special prototype virus. The power that this virus can bestow is so great that an immature individual, according to Spencer, has no right to possess it. In theory, this virus should improve a person, make him perfect, but in fact it turned out to be very selective and killed 11 candidates out of 13. Only Alex and Albert survived. Alex didn't gain any strength, because at the time of the injection she was sick, and the virus cannot improve a weak organism. But her half-brother was lucky, and the virus endowed him with all possible positive properties, changing his body and turning him into an almost immortal creature, looking completely like a human. That is, outwardly, except for the color of his eyes, nothing had changed in him. At the time of the injection, they were both 38.

I don't believe in theory that he lost his «humanity» due to mutation. On the contrary, he was never «human» in the classical sense of the word. He, like the others, was raised not to show empathy for others and was indoctrinated to believe that he was superior. Wesker had not changed, but because of his newfound freedom, he was no longer constrained by the limits Spencer's upbringing had placed on him.

When Wesker was 18, he was sent to the «Umbrella Executive Training School» with his future friend William Birkin, who was 16. They were research associates. As one could guess, the stress didn't end with his childhood, it coexisted with it. Following the text from his report, Wesker continued to feel like a mere toy in the hands of Umbrella, and further in the hands of Spencer, he literally raved in every paragraph about the old man. And to get out of this state was impossible from his words.

He and Birkin were led to Lisa Trevor, a subject who had been physically and psychologically abused in this School for many years. The horrible picture that opened before them, gave Wesker confidence that he could be in her place if he did his job badly. But he had no idea that he'd always been there, that every stage of his life was Spencer's experiment, just not as ugly.

Wesker wrote in his report: «We had two choices: succeed in our research... or lie here and rot like her. Thus we had only one option. This woman tied to a pipe touched something in our minds»

These thoughts are literally a revelation of his subconscious fear that has haunted him since childhood. A manifestation of humanity.

When Wesker entered this School, he felt freedom and saw the horrors of science for the first time. Perhaps a turning point in his life, for in order not to lose that little freedom, and his life, he had to do as he was told. Had to adjust and ignore the rationalism screaming inside. Working there greatly affected Birkin and Wesker, but Wesker had to transfer elsewhere to get more information about Spencer and also because of the realization that he had reached his research limit. When Birkin started studying the G-virus, Wesker realized that it was beyond his knowledge. Although he was good at science, he didn't want to do it all the time, he wasn't looking to improve his skills and knowledge, reaching for something else, as if trying everywhere, trying to find his place.

Close to the age of 38, Wesker gets a job in a special police unit as Captain of the S.T.A.R.S. Squad and a double agent. But he was already then pursuing a personal goal and found himself a triple agent. His goal was not simply to test bioweapons on members of his squad, as the assignment stated, but to escape with the results to another organization. The only way to break free from the influence of Umbrella, which is why he gave up his best people so easily.

It's unclear why he planted supplies on Chris in a difficult moment and helped him in every way he could if the trial was supposed to go «natural». Perhaps he wanted Chris to 100% make it to the final trial, but Chris was doing fine without it. Maintained the image of the captain? Game rules? Anything is possible. I'll use the code word «WX» to note this behavior, because I'll come back to this topic a few more times. «WX» stands for Wesker's penchant for actions that do not conform to his basic behavior, including helping others that does not bring him any personal benefit or benefit. In other words, good without any reason.

At the mansion, Chris and Jill get rid of the bioweapons in their path and make their way to the lab, where they catch Wesker off guard. There are 12 endings in the game, but only the one where Wesker is stabbed in the stomach by the Tyrant is canonical, as that is the ending depicted in Umbrella Chronicles, where the story is told on his behalf.

He survives by regenerating from a pre-injected prototype virus, but it's unclear if his death was part of the plan. His first report states that Wesker planned his temporary death from the Tyrant, but in subsequent retellings of this moment, I began to question how relevant this report was. His reaction and facial emotion shown in the re1 remake described surprise. But he couldn't be faking it at that moment, because he already had his back turned to Jill and Chris. Considering the way Wesker in Umbrella Chronicles describes his death, it seems like he really didn't expect this. Something didn't go according to plan. He didn't plan for this kind of trauma to activate the virus within him.

The point about the prototype virus is also worth mentioning. Birkin, on Spencer's orders, misled Wesker by telling him that this substance was developed specifically for him. That is, Wesker did not know the truth and details about having a huge probability of simply dying from the injection. Judging by the information in the notes, if Wesker had not injected it into himself, the virus would have entered his body in some other way, it was inevitable. The remaining 12 Weskers were injected with the virus, some by force, some at the request of a friend, and some under the guise of vaccination.

Let's take it a little further. Wesker was declared dead and moved on to another organization. Now his plan was to get rid of the sinking ship that is Umbrella. But why was he so intent on destroying it? It could have been a personal vendetta, after all, it was Umbrella that had manipulated his life and taken away his freedom. It was also a way to prove to his new organization that he was worth something.

By executing his plan, he inadvertently helped Chris and Jill, who were seeking the same thing. I'd call it «WX», but since he was pursuing a personal goal for his own benefit, it's 50\50.

Then in re4 he gives Ada the task finds the amber with the parasite Plaga. Considering that Wesker moves quietly around the island in the remake, it's odd that he didn't get that amber himself. With the power and speed from the virus, he took it all on the shoulders of one Ada, who was also infected during the mission, which only wasted his time. Didn't want to get his hands dirty? Maybe. But if he had gotten them dirty, the mission would have been completed faster, and isn't that a tactical advantage?

In the remake, he manifests «WX» (DLC Separate Ways) when he shows up at just the right moment for Ada and saves her from the ganados. After likely killing them with a gun, he takes a passed out Ada to Mendez's bedside, where he gives her a temporary recovery shot (or draws her blood?) But you know what's even weirder? He purposely chose a comfortable place for Ada, rather than laying her down on the ground somewhere. He was also there with her the entire time she was lying unconscious. I'd put an exclamation point on that weirdness, because... why? First of all, why did he save her when he could have continued the mission in her place? Recall Code Veronica, there Wesker arrived on the island with his HCF squad, but then we find his soldiers infected. He showed no concern for them and actually continued the mission on his own. Second, why did he keep sitting there? To scold and pathos leave?

He envisioned the option of Ada's possible betrayal and later stole Krauser's body, from which he had already extracted the Plaga sample, but he saved her anyway. Why? All of Ada's subsequent tasks on the island he could also have accomplished on his own and much faster. It's not like he was very busy if he allowed himself to sit with a sleeping Ada. The next meeting with Ada takes place on the elevation. Wesker brings her a case, pointing a gun at her. What is this gesture for? I don't think he sees her as a threat. Maybe it's a way to lend weight to his words, but doesn't he consider his authority absolute? He's a much bigger threat than the gun in his hand, so it's an odd action that makes him seem insecure.

After Ada's betrayal, one of Wesker's allies informs him that her helicopter can be attacked, but he refuses, calling it her "little act of defiance". Thus, he gives someone the Plaga sample she stole, and also spares Ada herself. It's «WX», though he could have gotten rid of two problems at once - the traitor and the competition.

We are now transported to the future, in the DLC for Re5 – «Lost in Nightmares». Here's where the fun begins.

DLC reveals to us that something has been bothering Wesker all his life, and that something is a subconscious manipulation that has been psychologically programmed into every Wesker. The so-called «Spencer's presence». It was a defense mechanism that constantly caused a sense of anxiety and a desire to seek out Spencer, to obey him. But this defense stopped working as soon as the old man met his prodigal son and told him everything. Wesker learned from him the whole truth about himself and about «project W», that his whole life had been manufactured. Then the defenses in his head were destroyed and he quietly killed Spencer, appropriating his dream for himself. He failed to deal with the realization of the truth, taking his dream of becoming God and creating a perfect humanity. An infantile fantasy of an unjust world that needed to be changed to fit his ideals.

In that moment, he faced his fear head-on. There she was - the cause of his fears, the person who had gotten into the depths of his mind, into his innermost being. Spencer. And now this old man was lying bloody on the floor. Perhaps Wesker should have been relieved and finally started living the life he wanted, not this old man. But he had taken Spencer's dream for himself, thus, once again acting against his will. In doing so, he didn't walk away from the problem, but exacerbated it without even realizing it. Wesker must have guessed that he had some problems, but his inflated ego that prevented him from thinking about it, screaming that he couldn't have any flaws. The problem became a hole that he tries to fill with things like this.

Whereas other characters conquer their fears by facing them, Wesker drowned in them, unwilling to change anything. His entire personality was built on the horror of losing himself, and when he found out that he basically had no self all his life, he lost his mind. He decided, since this world was unfair to him, then he needed to completely rewrite it and turn it into his own utopia, in which he would be whoever he wanted, untouchable, whom no one would point out and control.

However, thanks to the re4r (DLC Separate Ways), we now know that similar thoughts haunted Wesker even before he met Spencer. His desire to change people and start a new era he expresses after the credits. With this, the writers patched a few plot holes that appeared after re5. Now Wesker sounds like he didn't assign Spencer's goals to himself, but even before meeting him, he decided on a vision based on his upbringing.

Unfortunately, there is a long known scripting problem re5, because Wesker was not planned as a character who will survive the events of this game, so his motivation sounds stereotypical and stupid, because his plan and should not have been realized. Must be in the remake they will fix this flaw, because the beginning has already been made. His moment of frustration after killing Spencer is interrupted by Chris and Jill coming up. Consumed by rage, Wesker is seriously trying to kill Chris this time, or he was playing with him again, knowing that he would not oppose him. After saving her partner from death, Jill pushes Wesker out the window, falling down onto the rocks with him. After falling off a cliff, Wesker obviously survives, but also saves Jill. Why not just leave her to die? Why treat her and then plan to make her a test subject? Aren't there other healthy people out there? Stupid and empty revenge is not in his character. This is just another manifestation of «WX» and his obsessive desire to cling to the past.

I don't have much to say about re5, because Wesker died there, or we were made to think so. The only thing I will mention is his unhealthy attitude towards Chris. He displays it at every chance he gets. The notes about Wesker in Umbrella Chronicles state «As a spy he held the concurrent post of S.T.A.R.S. Captain and has been impressed by Chris' combat abilities since then», and during the events of Umbrella Chronicles, Wesker said the phrase «Chris, it appears our fates are forever intertwined». In the re1 remake and Code Veronica, he openly stated that Chris was «his best man» in a sort of unobtrusive admiration. It's no longer possible to perceive Redfield as separate from Wesker.

Each time he points a gun at him, Wesker never takes a shot on target. In the battle on the airplane, he points the gun at Chris without even putting his finger on the trigger. Such a good opportunity to kill him, to get rid of the enemy for good, and he just stands there holding a gun he's not even going to use. Just take the shot and it's over, but no, he's standing there babbling on as if it's actually that much more important to him. It's like Wesker was looking for an opportunity to vent to the very person from his past. It's reminiscent of the moment he pointed the gun at Ada. It's like he was trying to add weight to his words, to show the importance of what he was doing.

In Code Veronica, he decided to play with Chris instead of killing him. So many opportunities were missed, as if he couldn't physically hurt «his best man». Chris is Wesker's only drop of common sense. If he was sure of what he was doing, and also sure of himself, he wouldn't have left Chris any chance of survival. He would have killed Redfield at the first opportunity, but he stands there every time and doubts what he's doing. Chris is a kind of controlling element to him that constantly makes him hesitate.

And this strange hatred for Chris also raises questions. Maybe he hates him because he was jealous of what he owned? Something that cannot be obtained with money. Support, understanding, the love of a sister and close people, trust. Wesker compulsively convinced himself that he was not made for such things, for even having a sister, they did not possess affection. From the beginning he had no friends and his only companion was Birkin, though their relationship could hardly be called a normal friendship. He had no family or loved ones, and the only support he received came from «patrons» who were actually agents of Spencer and Umbrella. Seeing the Redfields supporting each other in difficult moments, being heroic, Wesker truly realized that he would never do the same. He has no people he holds dear, nor does he have those who hold him dear. There are no irreplaceable people in his worldview, but this connection between Redfields is probably beyond his comprehension. It's a simple human problem, which is why he's so fixated on himself, because if he loses the only thing he has, he'll have nothing left. He's miserable and drowning in his own despair.

While interacting with Chris on the volcano, Wesker first reveals his idealistic, infantile nature, naively dreaming of a better world without war and disease. Losing control of his powers and realizing that he will not defeat Chris in such a state, he decides to overdose himself with Ouroboros, which in the end does not make him stronger at all, but only slows him down, making him drown not only in weakness, but also in his own uncontrollable anger and frustration. Events are moving too quickly and so it can be assumed that his words here are not addressed to Chris, but to himself. After all, in the last battle he claimed to be «saving the world» and now he wonders «is it worth saving?» He dies without knowing the answer.

«However, there is no point in power if it consumes itself» his phrase, well suited to the situation at hand.

Btw, in the original idea, the moment before he died, his eye color would become natural, showing despair and horror. An interesting idea that was discarded.

I would also like to parse his phrases: «Only those with superior DNA will be chosen by Uroboros. Only those fit for survival will be allowed to carry their genes into a new age!» Also, «I don't need anyone else. I have Uroboros!»

Wesker is more aware of how the world works than anyone else. Corruption, betrayal, human vice and filth. He had to participate in it to achieve his goal, had to go through a lot of disgusting people for the sake of getting benefits, himself to sink to their level. Seeing this, he has become disillusioned with people, so he wishes they would disappear, giving way to someone more «worthy» of life. He also renounces everyone, entrusting his fate to his creation, desperate to gain understanding.

His life was cut short at the age of 48 (2009) in a volcano, but that's according to official reports. In theory Wesker and his possible clone are alive now, which we could learn from Umbrella Corps. But I'm not going to tell you about it here.

I failed to mention that at 32, Wesker had a relationship with a woman named Muller. Strangely, she was still alive afterward and had a good opinion of him. Although it would seem that with such a personality it should be the other way around.

She ended up pregnant, and now, as of 2021 in the re8 storyline, their son is 29 years old. I can understand why she might not have informed Wesker about the son, because first of all he might not have approved and made her get rid of him, and secondly she might have lost the ability to contact him, since he was working in secret. But the fact that she kept the baby speaks volumes. That the man she broke up with is genuinely pleasant to her. I mean, if he'd been the way he was at the time of his death, it's unlikely she would have kept the baby. Often victims of violence/abuse get rid of their children, no one wants a child from a tyrant. That's the side of this character that we don't know anything about.

It's hard to imagine how a person who has a fear of losing himself and who distances himself from others has managed to find a short-term relationship at all.

What about his personality? There's a double bottom here.

It's ambiguous. At first you see a stereotypical villain and then a psycho who wants to «save the world» by destroying it, a standard hackneyed scheme, nothing interesting.

But if you look closely, we see a simple man on the verge of despair. With his past behind him, he cannot give up everything and live the way he likes, because he is superfluous in this world. Because of his own fears, he has developed a belief that he has to strive for something in order not to lose himself. All Weskers have been raised to believe that they have a great destiny, which builds an unhealthy and extremely vulnerable self-esteem.

With his fear of losing his identity, Wesker isolates himself from others, creating psychological walls that even he is afraid to penetrate. This may be the reason he broke up with Ms. Muller. She risked getting into places where even his foot had not set foot, so it became necessary to distance himself from her in order to avoid unpredictable consequences.

His dream, adopted from Spencer, actually echoes his deeply buried problem. «Infect people with a virus that will only improve and not kill a select few like him» That is, Wesker dreamed of making people like himself. Isn't it loneliness and desperation that makes people do such things? It didn't seem that he was hungry for «power» specifically, because he already had it in the traditional sense. All the more, based on his words, he did not wish for evil with this gesture, he wished to «save» humanity, knowing that millions would die. For the sake of finding a company «worthy of him», he was willing to risk killing everyone and being alone. Desperate and lost, he began to make bad decisions.

You know, it's been unusually hard for me to see beyond the obvious. I feel like I did the wrong thing by taking it upon myself to judge him without knowing almost anything about him. I originally had a biased and negative opinion of the character. But now I've gone neutral.

What do I see in front of me now? A character disconnected from his own lore. We read about one thing and see something else entirely. And also an unhappy man. Wesker is famous for his reports. They were always interesting to read because of their informative and judicious tone, so it was much more interesting to watch him when he acted in accordance with his reasoning.

Judging from the story, he is able to evoke compassion and empathy in the viewer, but does he evoke it in action? In action, he evokes nothing. He is not even annoying, although a well-written character should evoke an emotional response, but he evokes it only with his story.

Creating something unambiguously negative is not a bad thing. But such a thing should be presented wisely, and it should have a certain kind of backstory, which will only deepen our belief that this object is evil.

But in Wesker's case, things went wrong from the start. Having created a story that resonates in you with an atmosphere of hopelessness, lack of choice, and fear of losing yourself, we see a character that doesn't match that. It's the events of the personal story that create the character, but if the character feels pulled from it, something went wrong in the writing.

If you are creating a character who is supposed to be compassion, the story should help with that, make you feel his problem. The same is true if you're writing someone who is negative and should be disgusting. Murder isn't enough to make a character a villain, the story is the main key. And our victim's story isn't about becoming evil at all, it's about fighting fear, where fear wins in the end, which doesn't fit with the concept of evil evil at all. That's why the player/reader/viewer can't always decide who he is: antagonist? Anti-villain? Who the hell is he?

[The beginning of an optional fragment]

By the way, there aren't enough facts in this analysis, so now we're going to break down the prototype virus that was injected into 13 Weskers. If you're not interested in that, skip to the next section. I haven't previously mentioned the Progenitor, from which many viruses in this universe originated, so the prototype is an unstable strain of the Progenitor, weakened dozens of times so as not to be too toxic. This virus either gives a person immense strength or kills them altogether. Alex stayed somewhere in the middle, because nothing happened to her, but her brother changed a lot.

Wesker has special genes, as well as immunity, that made the prototype fused with him. But activation, according to Birkin's report, requires a stressful situation. That means the hormones released as a result of stress dramatically amplify the influence of the virus, helping the body to initiate the fusion. It's all about hormones, we'll come back to that.

When Wesker received an injury incompatible with life from Tyrant, the hormones produced at that moment triggered the V-ACT process. He went into anabiosis, transforming all the cellular tissue in his body as well as repairing the damage he had sustained.

But having gained strength through a complete reorganization of his body, he was not yet aware of the instability of the virus inside. He didn't know that the prototype doesn't «fix» in his body. Therefore, the strength provided by the virus is not eternal, weakening with time.

So Wesker has to take PG67A/W regularly to re-secure the virus inside and stay strong. An insufficient dose of PG67A/W can cause malaise, and a large dose becomes poison. Which is what happened in re5 when Chris and Sheva injected him with the substance an extra two times. He experienced pain, and then presumably his powers escalated to the point where he no longer had control over them and they lost usefulness.

His son, Jake, also inherited genes and special immunity, which is why most viruses are harmless to him, but also do not give any advantages.

The fact that the forces of an overdose are not lost, proves the moment when Wesker easily damages the rocket with his bare hand.

Now back to the subject of hormones. Not only do they provoke viral activation, but they are a completely controlling element. Wesker, when provoking his emotions, can change the density of his own body, which also causes bioluminescence in his eyes. I noticed this when rewatching the re5 cutscenes. Always when he is about to strike, his eyes start to glow. Glow is emotion, and emotion is hormones.

This is why Excella can free pierce his skin with a needle and inject the drug, because at this point Wesker is calm and his body density is close to that of a human. In battle, his body is like a stone, it hurts Chris to hit him and this can be seen in his animations.

[The end of an optional fragment]

The injections are another painful element that robs Wesker of his sense of self-worth and freedom. Therefore, coupled with the fear of losing himself, he has an inferiority complex. This complex manifests itself outwardly in a superiority complex - in arrogance, an inflated ego, which we see in his behavior. This is the answer to the question of many people, why he behaves this way. Not considering himself a full member of society, not considering himself suitable for ordinary life, Wesker begins to believe that he is above «all that» and calls himself God, in other words self-deception.

An inflated ego is the result of psychological defense, a sign of hidden fears (loss of self). It also indicates the presence of insecurity, which he tries to hide by creating a strong image for the outside world. However, like many people with large egos, Wesker has a fragile self-esteem, which is why he hates so much the rude Chris who initially discerned his weak side. His self-esteem is closely tied to his ego, so with the image he has created, Wesker protects a side of himself that he never shows to others. He hides it even from himself, as I mentioned earlier.

I thought Jake's AI words would be perfect here:

This is the only fragment where I decided to have fun with AI, but it gave me something that really makes sense.

I would like to summarize, because the analysis turned out to be long, and something towards the end may have already slipped the reader's mind. So... What do we know?

Because of his nonstandard childhood and obsessive upbringing, Wesker has an unhealthy and extremely vulnerable self-esteem. By deceiving himself, he began to consider himself superior to everything ordinary, and to believe that he is simply not made for this cruel and unfair world with wars and diseases, so he dreams of creating «his own world», where there will be «equal» people, so that he will no longer feel superfluous.

Also, because of his childhood, he is withdrawn to the point where he hides his true feelings and needs even from himself. He feels safe as long as no one knows what he cares about. If you don't know what a person cares about, you can't manipulate him. And if he doesn't care about anything, he is invulnerable. He is afraid to be himself and express it. He himself doesn't know what «he» is really like. Judging by his phrases in the game, Wesker would like acceptance, but would never admit it openly.

It is also an echo of an effect he has been under the influence of all his life - the «fear of losing himself». This fear has become a convenient pattern of behavior in his life: pretending not to care about anything and believing it. People with this fear need to appear indifferent, not letting anyone know that anything matters to them.

But what is «fear of losing yourself»? It is the phobia that someone more powerful can manipulate you and take away your sense of security, of reliability, whereupon you no longer consider yourself strong and confident. Wesker felt for years that he was under Spencer's strong influence, his puppet, which cemented the «fear of losing himself» even deeper. Every step in his life was not his personal choice but Spencer's, Wesker was only made to think that he was acting on his own free will.

Loneliness and lack of empathy were also his eternal companions. Never having friends, never having family and support, and never having anyone that Wesker could cherish. And no one who would have treasured him. That's why he's so fixated on himself, because if he loses the only thing he has, he'll have nothing left at all. That's why he prioritizes pragmatism over emotion, easily betraying anyone and replacing one with another. But he also tends to cling to the past, sometimes betraying his pragmatism.

-------------------

Due to a misunderstanding, I would like to supplement my text. This analysis is only my personal interpretation and my personal view of the character and his story. I do not claim that it is 100% canon, because canon is so vague and disjointed that it is impossible to fully assemble it objectively. Everyone is entitled to have an interpretation different from mine. Best wishes to all!

#resident evil #rebhfun #resident evil 5 #resident evil 4 #albert wesker #chris redfield #umbrella chronicles #resident evil 6

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annabelle--cane · 20 days

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placing my hands out placatingly, asking everyone to please be cool and not reignite og!elias burnt out gifted kid discourse. okay? okay. I think this is setting up some more sam and gwen parallels. from mag 193, we know that elias bouchard (original flavor) was told from a young age that he was smart but lazy, he was squandering his advantages, and he was wrong to envy other children because they were meaningless and he was better. he seemed to internalize this to some extent, because by the time he was in his early twenties he had no friends and no family and no real life, just the certainty that he was destined to deserve better.

I think it is reasonable to assume that gwen received similar messaging during her childhood, as she seems to be treating the OIAR the same way elias treated artefact storage (as a stepping stone job to a bigger career waiting for her up the ladder), and she takes a lot of offence when she feels disrespected. from magp 03, we know she's reticent to tell her friends that she's still working this same job, especially because the friend's party she was going to was to celebrate making partner at a law firm.

from this episode, we know that sam was declared "gifted" as a child and his parents rigorously enrolled him in every program they could find, and it started going down hill when the magnus institute rejected him (did they reject him outright or was he there for a bit and then kicked out? what he said to celia doesn't quite fit his earlier statements, but moving on). he has a lot of pent up and fixated feelings about not being chosen by them, he didn't get into oxford, he just missed the highest grades, and he's reticent to tell his parents that he's working this job, especially because he used to be at a law firm.

we know the bouchards are a wealthy and influential family, and as sam speaks with a south asian accent I think it's safe to assume that his family immigrated. of course, there's a massive amount of variation in the socioeconomic statuses of south asian immigrant families in the UK, and I don't know enough about how british gifted kids programs work to know if sam having been in a bunch of them would imply anything about his parents' disposable income, but nonetheless I still think their different backgrounds potentially say a lot about how they handle these feelings of not meeting the high standards that were expected of / promised to them. gwen is fighting to be on the same level of social status and power as her peers, and sam probably felt like he was he had opportunities for upward mobility in this brand new place but kept failing them. it's causing both of them to be very active characters, they are the two people pushing the story forward the most by far, but the ways in which they are active diverge greatly.

gwen, until recently, had felt like she was unfairly stagnating, like she was "not most people" and was cut out for better, and being constantly barred from climbing the ladder made her both resentful of lena and extremely paranoid / insecure about her own worth. now that she's starting to crack it into the "real work," it's obviously taking a great toll on her, but she doesn't want to back out, she wants to prove herself and take what's rightfully hers and not show herself to be unfit for real power. her actions appear to be guided by an ethos that her life hasn't been wasted yet, she still has time to make good, she just needs to ignore that weakness masquerading as a conscience, please god don't let her fail.

sam feels like he's made mistake after mistake after mistake and led himself to his own desperate state where he only just managed to avoid destitution because his ex was kind enough to hook him up with an emergency job that is actively destroying his physical and emotional health, and he has pinned all this frustration on trying to figure out what the magnus institute was all about and why it didn't choose him. like gwen, great things were expected of him, but unlike her he doesn't seem to still be striving for them, that dried up when he had a breakdown at his last job. now he just wants to figure it out and make sense of it, as if solving the mystery will let him fix it and undo all that time and un-waste his promised potential. his actions seem to be guided by an ethos that, even though he's already screwed everything right up, solving the ghosts that haunt his life will some how lessen their burden and maybe, just maybe, give him closure on the Flaw That Doomed Him and allow him to move past it without dragging it still forward.

#tmagp #tmagp spoilers #marina marvels at life

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spidybaby · 8 months

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golden child part 3!!!<3

Golden Child | part 3

Summary: As your relationship with Pedro progresses, the relationship you have with your brother is in a limbo.

Warnings: cursing.

A/N: Hello, this was fun to write. Even tho it took me a lot more than I was expecting. Buuuut, I do hope you like this 😋💛

Also, special mention to @gadriezmannsgirl girly luv yu 💛

Part one | Part Two

"Tell me, where do you think all of this started?"

"The exact time?"

"No, but since you remember."

"I think I was six. Not sure, but I remembered that the first time I felt some kind of envy was when we got our grades back. She was the best of the three."

He paused for a moment. He was trying to remember, remember the way he felt.

"I tried my best, but that wasn't enough. No matter how much I studied, it did not matter. My mom asked my sister to help me with math one time, and I felt so stupid. I was the star on the field, but at home, I felt like I didn't matter."

"Do you think your parents focused more on your sister than on you?"

"No. Mom and dad dedicated all the time they had on the same level. They did what they thought was best. They worked so hard for us."

"And your other sister?"

"Aurora to me was a safe place." He smiles, thinking about her. "She was the shoulder to cry, the arms to go to after a good or bad day. She was home."

"I want to ask, do you feel you were outshine in your family? Not by mom or dad, by maybe the rest?"

"Well, I don't know if outshine is the term I'll go for. I think sometimes we were put against each other."

"In what way?"

"If I score at a game and got the team to win, my family was there to remind us that she was the best grade of all the cousins, siblings. But if she won a trophy for a science fair or something. They were there to congratulate me for the medal I got. Ignoring her."

"And how that made you feel?"

"Like I needed to win everything. Be better than her." He confesses, saying that outloud for the first time. "I wanted to feel like I was making them proud."

"You mentioned someone here, a friend from childhood. You blame her for making him leave. Why?"

"Arturo, he was my best friend. One night, he told me that he never wanted to see me or her again. He wanted nothing to do with us. And the commo denominator there was her."

"What happened after that?"

"I treated her like crap." He sighs, covering his face. "I used to be so mean, such and asshole."

"Elaborate on what you did to her."

"Bueno que también era un niño y no supe manejar mis emociones." (I was a kid who didn't control his emotions) he shrugs. "I used to pull her hair, I used to pinch her, I used to hurt her not only physically but emotionally. And I regret that."

"Why do you regret it?"

"Because I thought that hurting her was going to make me feel better. That's why I isolate myself from her. Because even though I felt good when I was a kid. It didn't as I grew up. And I was too dumb to recognize that."

"You told me that your sister Aurora tried to remedy things."

"She did. She used to play mediator with us, and at the time, I was fifteen. And I used to think that it was fun making her whine and cry. I thought it was a play from her. But I was only hurting our relationship more and more."

"And Aurora never told you anything in private?"

"She tried. But I cut her off leaving the room or not hearing her."

"Talk to me about the last fight."

"I got injured, right. So I needed to be taken care of, mom couldn't. Dad couldn't. Aurora couldn't. So, mom called her, and she helped me. But I-"

He takes a moment to continue. Lying was one thing, thing he thought was okay. Now that he admits he fucked up, it was a hard pill to swallow.

"I told my friends that she was my cousin. And while helping me, she and my friend Pedro got close during this time, Pedro told her about the lies I said. And she didn't say anything. Not to him, not to me. When he found out about it, he confronted me about it. And told me friends didn't lie to each other."

"Take your time. Breathe."

"I felt like the night Arturo left because of my sister. I went home, yelled at her, and well, hurt her."

"How do you feel now?"

"Como un hijo de puta, I feel so fucking bad, because my parents think it's on them, because Aurora can't even be around me, because Pedro and I don't even talk and because I think she will never speak to me in her life." (like an asshole)

"Okay, let's take a breath before continuing."

- three months later

"Pablo, are you joining us?" Javi asks him, entering the room without knocking. "Get up, let's go."

"No."

"Get your lazy ass up."

Javi grabs the pillow Pablo is using, hitting him with it.

"Con una mierda, Javi."

"Oh, don't get fussy, let's go. We're waiting for you."

"We? It's more like you 'cause Aurora is definitely not."

"If you're not down in five, I'll come back with ice cold water."

Pablo and Aurora haven't talked in months. She will do anything in her power not to talk with him. Asking his parents or boyfriend to deliver the message. Texting instead of talking. Everything.

You told her that was totally unnecessary, but she wanted to keep a silent vow. And she was doing such a splendid job in her brothers opinion.

"Hola."

Pablo noticed the way his sister quieted down once he joined. He hates it.

"Finally, we were about to leave." Javi says, excited to get the two siblings together. "Eat something, we're living in ten."

Aurora and Javi planned this hiking trip two weeks ago, but Javi wanted Pablo to join them, wanting to be the one to get these two on talking mode again.

When they left, Aurora was in charge of the music, always playing something she could sing, so she didn't give any opportunity for Pablo to engage.

The hiking was great. They were climbing this place that was open for hikers. The view was beautiful and the air was fresh.

"I want a picture of this view. It's amazing."

"So beautiful."

"Take a picture of me, please."

Aurora hands her phone to her boyfriend, but he has other plans. "Hey, I think I drop something. Pablo, take the picture, and I'll go search."

Before they could say anything, he ran a little away from them.

"Okay. Let me take that picture."

"No."

"Rora, por favor. It's just a picture."

She stares at him for a few seconds, handing the device into his hands. Pablo can't help but smile a little, taking the pictures.

"I been going to therapy." Pablo confess, he's proud of the progress he has made. "I've been constant and it's been so much help."

His parents agreed on not telling anyone, letting him choose who to tell. Aurora noticed some changes, mostly his attitude in the field. He was calm and not as aggressive as before.

"I'm sorry," he sighs. "What I did was wrong, the way I reacted. I hurt you, and I regret it."

"You not only hurt me."

"And I'm sorry for that too. But right now, I need to apologize to you."

Aurora stays quiet, a little too long for him to become nervous.

"You know I love you, cabezon." She hugs him. "And I know you're trying to be a better person. You're my baby, and I want the best for you and the best right now is what you're doing."

Javi is smiling from afar, seeing that his plan was successful.

- four months later

"Mami, please. I think I'm ready and I really need to do this."

"Pablito, sorry but no."

"Papá, please help me."

"Sorry, mijo, I'm with mom. We think it is too soon for you to do this."

He buffs, angry at the fact that his parents don't think he's ready to talk with you.

"Fine, I don't care."

But he cares, he wants to apologize, he wants to fix all the things he broke. The therapist told him that if he made a big progress, he had been working on himself.

His whole demeanor changed, and fans have noticed that. He was not that little bomb ready to go off with the minimum touch.

He still has that force and energy on the pitch. Just this time, he's controlling his reactions, choosing his battles.

The whole day, he spent it on his room. He was taking the weekend in Sevilla. He felt needy of love from his family. Needing some homemade food, some quality time with his father.

"Hey, cabezon. Dinner is ready."

"I'm not hungry."

"Pablo, what's going on?"

"I want to talk with Y/n, I feel ready to apologize. But mom and dad don't think the same."

"Ay pablito," Aurora patt his arm. "I know you feel ready, I really do. But in my opinion, you need a little bit more time."

"Just give me her number, please."

"Cabezon, we're not doing this. Let's go eat."

"I don't like you guys." He says, getting inside the bathroom.

- five months later

"Gavi, Pedri, Fermin." Xavi calls. "You're against Araujo, Ale and Robert."

"Pedri, do you wanna be on the center?" Fermin asks. "Let's do this, I'll go for Ronald, Pablo can attack Ale and you Robert, vale?"

Pedri and Gavi nod, positioning themselves next to each other. Since the last time they talked, Pedro was distant. If they had to talk, they did, but most of the time, Pedro would be next to Ferran.

The game was fun. The whole team had a good time. But in Pablo's mind, he needed to talk to Pedro, get on good terms with him.

He waited till the end of training, not wanting to ruin the mood. "Pedri"

"Mhm?"

"Can we talk? Please."

Pedro thinks about it for a while. He's not sure if it was the time or place. "Sure, let's just get a shower and then talk."

Pablo agrees, wanting to wait till the others are gone so they can talk alone with no one to bother them.

"Ferran, te veo en casa de Hector. Bye." (I'll meet you at Hector's)

"Okay, platanito. See ya. Bye Gavi."

Pablo waves him goodbye. He's anxious about the talk.

"So." Pedro says, taking the lead. "How are you?"

"Good, it's been good. Can't complain."

"That's great. I notice you're improving with the penalties."

"Yeah, getting better." He smiles. "How is your leg? How are you feeling?"

"So much better, thanks for the recommendation with the doctor. She's a life saver."

"The physio is the best, she knows how to create the best routines."

"And how is your family?"

"They're good, mom and dad are going on a little vacation, and Aurora is staying with me for a few days."

"Qué envidia, yo también quiero unas vacaciones." (What an envy, I want some vacations too) he laughs.

"How is she?" Pablo drops the bomb.

"She's fine."

They both stayed quiet, and the awkward moment grows by the minute.

"I need to ask you a favor."

"Pablo, I don't like where this is going "

"I need to talk to her. Por favor." He begged. "I really need this."

"No, hermano. I can't help you."

"Listen, I really need to speak with my sister."

"With who?" He asks, laughing, the bitterness of his tone is clear. "I thought that for you she wasn't your sister." Pedro, use the words Pablo told you.

You told him what happened after he insisted. You wanted to keep him away from the drama, but he wanted a new start with no lies.

He left Pablo alone in the dressing room. Angry but quiet. He can't deny the surprise he has at his friend being so calm.

- six months later

"I have something for you"

"Another gift?" You ask laughing. "Pedro, you really have to stop with the gifts."

"Never." He leans over to kiss you. "Te quiero." (I love you)

"Te quiero mucho más." (I love you so much more) You return the kiss, grabbing his cheeks to get him even closer. "What is that?"

He hands you the bag. The big white bow makes it look more fancy than it should.

"No, you didn't."

"I hope this covers my debt."

The dress he, in his own words, ruined with his drink at the party, that party where you shared your first kiss and the same night when he made you his own.

"Oh, Pedro!" You throw yourself at him. He receives you with open arms. "You're such a lover boy." Kissing his cheeks, making him laugh.

"I thought I was your golden boy."

"That too."

"C'mon, we don't want the lasagna to burn," He carries you bridal style back to the kitchen. "Again." He whispers the last part, mouth against your cheek, making you laugh.

"Okay, put me down." You kick your legs in the air. "Hey, tomorrow Aurora and I are going to go shopping. And I know your mom's birthday is coming, so tell me some ideas of what can I get her."

"I think she would want you to have dinner with her instead of a gift, mom is more family like, so yeah."

"Pepi." You sigh, "y si cago las cosas con tu madre?" (what if I fuck things up with your mom?)

"Deja de pensar eso. Mis padres te adoran, incluso les caes mejor que Fer." He laughs. (Stop thinking that. My parents love you. They even like you more than Fer.)

"That's good news then." You laugh with him. "Can I have her number then? So I can arrange something with her."

He nods, handing you his phone. The picture he has as a lockscreen is the two of you in a picnic he planned where he asked you to be his girlfriend.

Some fans noticed the new lockscreen and began creating some theories about who you were. You both were very careful with the fans and the pictures. You didn't want to be public, and he respected that. He was also being a very private person.

The two of you had dinner between laughs and funny stories that Pedro shared with you. You loved how he always plans nights with you even with the little time he has.

🔅🔅🔅

"Javi and I are staying at this amazing airbnb. I need some away time."

"But again, if I mention that I sleep over at Pedro's, you got all crazy."

"I'm not engaging in this talk." She says, walking away to another section of the store.

You both were shopping for her getaway trip, and you loved spending time with her. "Look at this." You grab a one piece that matches her style.

"When are you going back home?"

"Mmm, maybe during this break, I miss everyone. And my room."

You keep looking for something you can get, not liking much of the store.

"I want to ask you, mom, and I are planning this dinner for dad's birthday." She says slowly. "And mom wants to do it at Pablo's. If we decide to make the party there, would you come?"

"I don't know." You mumble. "If it's for him, I would go. You know I don't have a problem with Pablo."

"But?"

"But I don't want to he a burden or create drama."

"You don't create drama Y/n, he does. He always does."

"Always is a little dramatic. He's dumb but not that dumb." You roll your eyes at her.

"A veces creo que eres demasiado buena para todo lo que te ha pasado." (Sometimes I think you're too kind for everything you been through)

"Am I supposed to let this be my villain story?"

"No." She laughs. "Well, to me, that would have been the beginning."

You finish shopping some outfits she put together. Moving yourselves to the food area.

"How are you and Pedro doing?"

"We're good." You blush at the thought of him. "I can't deny you that I'm falling in love with him."

Aurora screams, making some people turn to her. "Rora, stop." You cover your face.

"I can't help it, I've been waiting for this moment since we were kids, and we talked about getting married at the same time in a candy castle."

"A veces te pasas un poco, Rora." (You're a little too much sometimes)

🔅🔅🔅

"Can you turn the AC off? Or pass me your shirt?" You say, getting you head up off the pillow. "Please, it's cold."

"I like you more without it." He walks back to the room with a wet cloth in his hands. He cleaned you slowly, kissing your knees. When he's done he throw the cloth somewhere around his room. He gets back in bed with you. "I love you."

"I love you too." You kiss his cheek, caressing the other one with your tumb. "But turn the AC off."

"Luego me pediras volver a encenderlo" (you will ask me to turn it back on)

He turns on a movie, arms never leaving you. His way of aftercare is touch. He likes being close to you, hands up and down your back, lips on your forehead, hearts in syntony.

This time was no different, one hand on your head, massaging your scalp. Loving the little sounds of satisfaction you make.

His other hand is on you back, drawing little nothings into you. Loving the heat of your body in the cold room.

You kiss his jawline, the raspy feeling on your lips is intoxicating, something you love feeling every time you kiss his cheeks or his jawline.

The movie was playing in the back, you humm the song that's playing in the soundtrack. Lips glued to his skin and hands on his chest, his heartbeat can be felt.

"Let's go to Tenerife this weekend." He breaks the silence between you. "El Mister nos dio cinco días luego de haber ganado. Así que podemos ir por tres o cuatro días si tu quieres." (Mister gave us five days after the win we got, so we can go for three or four if you want)

"Actually, I want to tell you something. I need your opinion."

He waits for you to tell him. You're not sure if bringing the topic is tue right thing to do.

"Mom and Rora are planning this birthday dinner for my dad, and I'm not sure if I want to go."

"You don't want to go to your father's birthday?" He lifts his eyebrows in surprise. "Why?"

"Not that I don't want to go, I do." You sigh tired. "But the thing is that they're hosting the dinner at Pablo's."

He only hummed, not sure what to answer. He's not one to tell you not to go or to force you to go if you don't feel good doing it.

You free yourself from his hold, sitting and looking for his t-shirt. He stretched to the floor, reaching for his shirt and handing it to you.

"I'm undecided." You pouted. "I told Aurora that I want to go, but I'm not sure if Pablo wants me there."

Pedro scratched your back in a confort way. He does this as a way to let you know that he's there and he hears you.

"I don't want any drama, especially not on his birthday."

He thinks about that time in the dressing room when Pablo told him about needing to speak with her.

He didn't tell you about it, mostly because he didn't want you to get triggered about it.

"Pepi," you call him. Taking him out of his thoughts. "Are you okay?"

"I have to tell you something."

You waited a few seconds, but after the seconds turned into minutes you decide to ask him.

"Tell me what?"

"Pablo and I talked."

"Okay, about what?"

"Nada, quiere hablar contigo pero le he dicho que no." (Nothing, he wants to talk with you, and I told him no)

"When did this happen?"

He sighs, not wanting to admit that he hid this from you. "Like a month ago."

You turn to him, his hand rubbing his eyes. "A month?"

You tried to process everything. Pablo was looking to reach you out. "Pedro, por qué no me dijiste?" (why didn't you tell me?)

"I'm honestly not sure, I wanted to, but I just forgot."

"You forgot?" You scuff. Se te olvidó decirme que Pablo está buscándome? Y tu le dijiste que no?" (You forgot to tell me that Pablo was looking for me? And you told him no?)

"I'm trying to protect you."

"Mi amor, you should have told me."

You stayed quiet, both of you did. The only sound is the movie still playing.

Your mind is running a thousand miles per minute, questioning everything. Your forehead frowned.

Your eyes look for Pedro's eyes, his eyes glued to the ceiling. Your expression softens. You know he's very protective.

You stretch your arm, hand grabbing his chin to make him look at you. "Thank you, honestly." You smile. "I know you wanted to protect me, I love you."

His hands reach for yours, bringing it to his lips. "Te quiero, preciosa. I promise I didn't mean to keep this, I just didn't find the right time to tell you."

He opens his arms for you. Smiling sweetly, that smile that you can't say no to. You fall into his arms.

"I don't like when you're sad, and I didn't wanted you to feel forced to talk with him when you weren't ready."

"Stop, I get it." You kiss him to stop him from speaking again. "Does Saturday, Sunday, and Monday sound good to you?"

Hie frowns in confusion, not getting what you mean. "What?"

"You said five days. And the dinner is on Friday so we can visit Tenerife for three days and come back so you can rest on the fifth day."

"Mirame." He says, releasing his grip on you. "You're the best, and I hope you know that you will have to die in order for me to let you go."

"And I hope you know that even if I die, I'll come back to get you and kill you to be with you as ghosts together."

He grabs your cheeks, slamming his lips into you. "Wait." He breaks the kiss. "Would you be nice to me when you kill me?"

"Mmm, not sure. If you make me feel good right now, I'll consider it." You joke, smiling as you sit on his lap, your lips looking for his.

- 30 hours before the party

You stood in front of the door. Code already in, but you can't seem to open it.

"Are you okay?" Aurora asks, she's behind you waiting for you to enter.

You nod. You're not sure if you're really okay. You want to stop thinking of the fight. The memories make your head hurt.

"Hey!"

You turn your head to your boyfriend. Pedro drove you and Aurora to Pablo's House. He wanted to make sure you felt comfortable.

"Hey." You whisper, head inside the window car.

"You don't have to if you don't want to." He reminds you something Aurora told you.

"I want to."

"Okay, I'm going to be around here. If you need me, call me."

You smile, walking fast to his side of the car. "I love you. Please don't park a street away and pretend you were somewhere else."

"Ay Joder, you ruined my plans."

After a kiss goodbye and he promising not stalking from afar. You stand next to Aurora. She opens the door and grab your hand to walk inside.

"Pablo!"

You grab the bag of groceries she has in her hands. Walking to the kitchen to leave them there.

"Someone wants to see you."

"Really, who?"

The steps coming closer to the kitchen are making you nervous. Even when Aurora told you to be calm and that nothing was going to happen, you can't help the feeling.

"You coming?"

You grab her hand, squishing it in a way of comfort. His back is facing you. Even his back has this towering feeling.

"Cabezon," Aurora says, catching his attention.

When he notices you, his whole face changes. His expression is softer, but still having his signature frown.

"Voy a dejarlos solos, así pueden hablar. Estaré arriba." (I'm going to leave you two alone. So you can talk. I'll be upstairs)

The silence is thick. The whole thing was uncomfortable for the two of you.

"I like your shirt." You say, not sure on what else to say.

"Thanks, mom got it for me on my birthday."

"Right. Well, happy belated birthday."

"I still have some candy in the freezer if you want. You like it."

"No, I don't." You shake your head no at the thought.

"You don't? What about all the times you used to freeze the candies when we were kids?"

"Pablo." You sigh. "The one that likes frozen candy is you, I used to freeze it for you, not because I was eating it."

"Oh." He joined his lips, and bit from the inside, thing he does when he's nervous. "I want to say that I'm sorry."

You squeeze your eyes. Was he saying it because he felt it or because mom told him to?

"I made a mistake. And I blame hurted you in a way I never meant to." He walks closer to you. "I'm really sorry, you didn't deserve the way I treated you, the way I hurted you."

"You told me that you hate me." You walk past him to the other side of the room. "And that I'm not a sister to you."

"And I regret doing that. I was wrong."

"You hurt me, and I'm not talking about the things that happened that day, I'm talking about everything you did to me."

"I was angry at you!"

"Why?" You say matching his tone. "To my knowledge, I've done nothing wrong."

"Eras tan jodidamente perfecta y todos te querían." (You were so fucking perfect and everyone loved you) he finally says. "You were the favorite in school. You were so good at everything. And then our family used to be like 《oh but Pablo is only good at football. She's the best at every other thing》 I could help it, I was dying out of envy. I wanted to be you."

You stayed quiet. You knew he didn't like it when family members compared the two of you. Your mom tried to stop it, always reminding him that you were two different people.

"Pablo." You tried to get closer. "You didn't have to be me. You were amazing."

"You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"Pablito, come here." You open your arms to him.

For the first time in so long, you hug him, his arms squeezed you, his head on your shoulder.

"I need you to believe me. You were and are amazing. Look at you, playing on the team of your dreams, with the national selection. I wish you would have told me this before."

"I'm sorry, I was so angry at you."

"I'm not perfect, Pablo." You caress his back, trying to calm him down. "I'm so far from being perfect. And you know that."

"Well, you don't know how to cook rice."

"Shut up, you eat it."

"No, but I'm really sorry. I don't hate you, and you are my sister."

"It's okay, Pablito."

"No, it's not.' He break the hug. "I was so wrong, all this years. I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm sorry for all these years."

"It's okay. We have time to fix this. We can do this together."

"Te quiero, en serio lo hago. Even tho you burn the rice." (I love you, I really do). He says, laughing. "Please, forgive me."

"Te quiero también, siempre lo haré." (I love you too, always do) you hug him again. Enjoying the feeling.

- three days later

"I want to be a mermaid." You laugh as Pedro splash some water on your face. "You definitely be the crab."

"The crab taking care of the very pretty mermaid?"

"I'll make you take care of a manatee."

"Are there any manatees in Spain?" He asks, confused. "Never seen one."

"You're so weird, but I love you like that." You hug him from behind, using him as a personal flootie.

You spent more time in the water, enjoying the vibe of the island. The sun, the air. Everything with him.

"Mamá nos hizo sus famosas croquetas, así que al fin las probaras." (mom made us her famous croquettes. You're finally trying them)

"Maybe I like them more than I like you." You laugh, grabbing his hands and bringing him close. "Or maybe I'll seal the deal with her over her son."

The kissing didn't last long, as Fer went looking for you to bring you over to the tasca.

"Fer, when are you introducing me to your girlfriend?"

"When he finds one." Pedro laughs.

"Hey!" Fer says, poutting. "That's mean."

🔅🔅🔅

The sun is setting, leaving this magical orange tone in the sky. You smile for the picture, Pedro insisted on taking a picture of you.

"You look amazing."

"Take a picture with me."

"Always."

His lips on yours, making you feel like drunk in love.

"You have no idea how in love I am with you." He says, eyes shining with honesty. "I got to thank Pablo for getting injured."

You laugh at his joke. "We got to thank him."

"No, but really. I love you to a way I never thought I would, even if we haven't been together for that long. Your eyes, your hair, your heart, the way you laugh, or the way your eyes shine when you talk about what you love, the way you always make sure everyone is comfortable. The way you love your family. The way you love my family, how you're with Fer. You're just you. And I'm thankful for that.

You feel like crying. Nobody ever loved you the way that he did, never sharing a love so pure and so great.

"And you are you. For me, it's the way you love football, the way you love your mother's food, how funny you are, and how much you turn into a little kid every time we joke around. How much do you work and get better at everything you do. Your accent is beautiful, your love for your family, for your brother, and your love for me. Because I never thought I would find someone like you."

- two months later (Barça vs. RMA)

"I bet that goal was for me." Fer jokes, making you laugh. "The eyes were looking at me."

"Definitely, I think the wink and the kiss were a symbol of brotherhood."

"I hate that you follow my jokes." He shoves you delicately. "Like, get angry or something."

"Don't even try. We grew up with that." Aurora says, pointing at Pablo. "So, not a chance, she's well trained."

"Yeah, the only one who has to worry here is Chris. She's the one that has to put up with him."

"I'm not sure myself." She laughed at the jokes.

Chris is Pablo's girlfriend. He introduce her to Aurora and to you a few weeks ago, and you now bring her around everywhere like a little sister.

The referee announces the end of the match, and the team won. It was a good day for everybody.

"Let's go, señoritas." Fer gets up, offering his arm to you.

"Let's go, señorito." You joke with him.

You waited by the car, talking about the meal Fer prepared before the match and was waiting for you at home.

"Hello, hello." Aurora say to Pedro and Pablo.

"Omg, you guys did amazing!" You hug Pedro, kissing his cheek. "Congratulations, baby."

"Yeah, yeah, kiss kiss, let's go home, I'm hungry."

"You're just jealous of her." Gavi jokes, hitting Fer in the head. "She got your brother."

"I was his go-to, now I'm the seconds one." He fake cries. Making you all laugh.

"And I got your sister." Pedro shoves Gavi's arm playfully.

"Yeah, you better take care of her. If not, you saw how I shoved Vini? That would be you."

"Okay, stop it. Let's go."

You start walking toward Pedro's car, hand in hand with him while Fer was telling him something.

"Oye," Gavi shouts. Making you all turn. "Me darás mi abrazo?" (Do I get a hug, too?) You let go of Pedro's hand, running to your brother. "Venga."

You land in his arms, squeezing him. "I love you, Pablito."

"And I love you." He kisses your cheek, letting you go. "Let's go, I want some of that burned rice."

"Hey!" Fer says, "my rice is not burnt." He makes Pablo and you laugh.

🔅🔅🔅

🏷: @gadriezmannsgirl @percysley @jajajhaahaha @cinderellawithashoe @alwaysclassyeagle @christianpulisic10 @utdmount @lilians17 @urmotheris

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xkaidaxxxx · 2 months

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Zuko x chubby reader

Mentions: body shaming, foul language, angst,aggression, lying, fluff?!

Simple! :) sorry for errors.

“You look very beautiful y/n.” Katara mentioned "Thanks. I decided it's time for a change." You replied. Katara's complement made you blush. Sokka was surprisingly good at cutting hair. He gave it layers and added braids that held your hair back. “ I agree with Katara” Mai spoke. You instantly felt horrible with the new hairstyle. Mai isn’t the one to express her feelings so that comment made you believe otherwise. Perhaps cutting your hair shouldn't have crossed your mind.

Aang noticed you playing with the charm bracelet you wore. It tells him a lot about how you feel. He noticed you'd touch a certain charm with the emotion you were feeling, such as anger, happiness, sadness, anxiety, etc.“Katara is right y/n. It suits you! Sokka did a great job.” He spoke. He had that nice big smile. “ New hair cut? Looks nice” Zuko said patting your back. You’ve been dating him for 4 months and you’re very thrilled about it. He’s very kind and romantic when alone with you.

The day went on by. Everyone was calm. You can hear the ocean tides and feel the wind blowing. “Tell her. I’m tired of hiding.” Mai said. Zuko rubbed his temples. “It’s not that simple Mai. I can’t dump her out of the blue.” He responded. You heard them. “You don’t even like her. Why did you agree on dating her?” Your tears slipped. You didn’t want to hear his answer. “Because…she’s saved me many times..and I felt bad. It looked like she was going to cry if I said no.That and how many guys do chubby girls date? Almost never. I’m giving her a little hope.” You cried silently. You felt sudden saddens and hate. Running towards the ocean Katara called out to you. “ Y/n we’re making lunch! Wanna come help?” You ignored her walking back and forth. The waves following your movement. You made a fist. Your anger was so out of control you created a storm. “ Hey! Y/n you created a problem here!” Sokka yelled as Aang used his air bending to keep the water from drenching them. “Sorry!” You took a few deep breathes calming away the storm and the crazy waves.

“What’s got you so upset?” Katara asked giving you a tight hug. “ I keep losing my arrows. Haha. I overreacted.” She knew you were lying. She’s your most trusted person. Katara understands your personality, sense of humor, and the way you just are. She whispered. “We can talk about it later.” You smiled and nodded. Lunch was yummy. Everyone’s stomach was content.

Another 3 months went by. All the same apparently Zuko still loves you and wants to spend was much time with you as possible. It was such bullshit. You heard him leave with Mai at midnight. You saw how they treated each other. The little things showed everything.

The ride on the ship was wild. Not because there was a storm or someone was throwing arrows,fire rocks or trying to drown you all. Simply because an argument started.

“ you have no right to be upset. I’ve known him longer. You don’t get it.” Mai said with a straight face. You couldn’t believe what she said. The fire nation is insane however a regular family took you in. You eventually met Zuko. “ Have no right to be upset!? Are you kidding me? Yeah, he was your childhood sweetheart or whatever but who followed behind him when he was exiled !? Me! Which one of us cared to help him emotionally? Me! I’ve given him all my love and support even if it meant I’d be killed on the spot for betraying the fire nation. You did nothing but hide underneath Azula’s shadow and power. Yeah, I have every right to be upset.” You replied tears falling down your cheeks. Everyone was witnessing this mess. You were smarter, stronger, and more reasonable than her. “Zuko out of all the mistakes you’ve made. Cheating on me is the worst one. I know I’m beautiful even if I’m skinny or not. Not many chubby girls get boyfriends you sure were right about that. You should’ve rejected me from the start because I don’t need your pity.” You spoke finally feeling relieved. You said everything you’ve been wanting to say. “You heard us that day? Why didn’t you confront us then?” Zuko asked looking Towards Mai and then at you. “I had hope that along the way you’d realize what you did was wrong and you’d fall in love with me. 3 months later it’s the same. Clearly, I was wrong. I’m done. I’m dumping your ass. I hope you feel guilty for body shaming and lying.” You replied holding onto Katara’s arm. You couldn’t help but do so. She’s your best friend since you’ve met her. “ One day there will be an amazing man who will fall in love with you. He’ll love everything about you.” Katara said. You smiled and hugged her. “ Awe!” Aang and Sokka said in unison.

Pt.2 is posted !!!

#prince zuko #zuko #fire lord zuko #zuko x reader #aang #aanglove #sokka #toph #fanfiction #the last airbender #princess azula #fanfic #elements #avatar the last airbender #aang the last airbender #airbending #firebending #earthbending #waterbending

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olenvasynyt · 3 months

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Similarities between Elain and Lucien

Alright, this has been something I’ve wanted to talk about for a while now because it is a huge reason why I ship Elucien. I think many people don’t realize how similar they are to each other, which might be driving many people away from the idea of Elucien being a thing in the future. And I know a lot of people dismiss or deny these similarities too. So I want to point them out and talk about them! And some of these may be a little bit of a stretch but a lot of them I feel are pretty significant and intensional on SJM’s part.

Love for parties and socializing

They are both social people. They are seen to enjoy parties, enjoy being in crowds.

Tamlin made Lucien emissary because of how social he is. He has many friends and allies across Prythian, he enjoys the parties and social aspects of court.

Page 161 of ACOTAR: “I claimed Lucien as my own—-named him emissary, since he’d already made many friends across the courts and had always been good at talking to people, while I…can find it difficult.”

Page 32 of ACOMAF: [Tamlin] assured me that he hated the gatherings as much as I did, and that Lucien was the only one who really enjoyed himself.

Elain also enjoys parties and socializing, we see it the most often in ACOTAR:

Page 256 of ACOTAR: “The socialite season, which ended a few weeks ago, apparently, full of parties and balls and luncheons and gossip, gossip, gossip. Elain had told me all about it at dinner the night before, hardly noticing that it was an effort for me to get down my food.”

She plans the ball Papa Archeron throws in Feyre’s honor and at that ball, we see how social she is and how much she enjoys it.

Page 268 of ACOTAR: But I tried to smile, if only for Elain, who flitted about the room, personally greeting each guest and dancing with all their important sons.

After the sisters are changed into Fae we lose sight of that side of Elain but in ACOFAS, Nesta points it out to Feyre when they are having a fight about Elain, that their sister used to love crowds and parties, she didn’t always hate being in crowds like Feyre claims.

Traveling

Traveling is one of their interests. As I said before, Lucien has many friends across Prythian, he has traveled a lot during his youth and as the emissary of Spring.

Page 160 of ACOTAR: “…so he spent his youth doing everything a High Lord’s son probably shouldn’t: wandering the courts, making friends with sons of other High Lords…”

And Elain has talked about her interest in traveling.

Page 256 of ACOTAR: “’These bulbs came all the way from the tulip fields of the Continent. Father praised that next spring he’ll take me to see them.’”

Dismissed by the people around them, especially growing up

They are dismissed by the people around them. When they were growing up, they were not wanted or needed by their families. They weren’t really taken seriously.

Lucien explains that he wasn’t wanted or needed during his youth:

Page 106 of ACOWAR: “As the youngest of seven sons, I wasn’t particularly wanted or needed. Perhaps it was a good thing. I was able to study for longer than my brother allowed by brothers…I could train for as long as I liked. I learned what I could of the land from its people. Learned about the people, too.”

and Feyre explains in Sliver Flames that their mother treated Elain “as barely more than a doll to dress up”. Their mother saw little to no potential in Elain:

Page 130 of ACOSF: “I mean, it was always that way with us, and our mother. She only had an interest in Nesta. She ignored me, and saw Elain as barely more than a doll to dress up.”

I don’t think their childhood was the same, Beron and Lucien’s brothers were a lot more harsh to him, and Nesta said that Elain never received the same abuse that Nesta did from their grandmother. But I find it interesting how Lucien says perhaps it was a good thing he wasn’t wanted or needed. Lucien wasn’t held to a high standard as his brothers were, he wasn’t used for politics as much as they were. He was and still is underestimated. And I think all of this applies to Elain too, not only with mother Archeron and their grandmother but also in general, with her sisters and the IC.

Good relationship with one of their parents

They are the favorite child of one of their parents. LoA loved Lucien the most because he was her son from Helion:

Page 456 of ACOWAR: “The Lady of Autumn’s favorite son—not only from Lucien’s goodness. But because he was the child she’d dreamed of having…with the male she undoubtedly loved.”

And Elain was loved the most by Papa Archeron I think, she was his princess, she was the only one who treated him kindly:

Page 17 of ACOTAR: “He was smiling mildly at his beloved Elain, the only one of us who bothered to really speak to him at all.”

Clinging on to their old lovers

And this similarity is probably the most important imo: they are stuck in the past clinging to their old lovers that they lost.

Lucien is often thinking of Jesminda to the point where he is stuck on her; when he is in front of his mate alone for the first time, he compares her to Jesminda, who has been dead for centuries. He has had plenty of lovers before but Jesminda is a huge part of his heart.

Page 249 of ACOWAR: “But there she was. His mate. She was nothing like Jesminda.”

I think his guilt influences his thoughts but he cannot get over her and the life that he was going to have with her. He expected to marry her, he thought they were mates, and when he is in front of his true mate he has feelings of passion and attraction but he is disheartened because Elain is not Jesminda. He can’t stand to be in the room with her.

Page 250 of ACOWAR: “But he couldn’t breathe as she faced him fully. She was the most beautiful females he’d ever seen. Betrayal, queasy and oily, slid through his veins. He’d said the same to Jesminda once.”

And Elain is stuck on Grayson. She was expecting to marry him, she thought he loved her and all of that falls apart because she got her fae mate.

Page 498 of ACOWAR: ‘I don’t care what his name is, you are his mate.’ ‘It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—‘ ‘you belong to him.’ ‘I belong to no one, but my heart belongs to you.’ Grayson‘s face hardened. ‘I don’t want it.’ He would’ve been better off hitting her, that’s how deep the hurt in her eyes went.

She wishes to be human still and having a mate is the most fae thing you can have and this is disheartening to her and she avoids Lucien because of this.

Page 167 of ACOFAS: “‘He doesn’t know me.’ ‘You don’t give him the chance to even try to do so.’ “‘I don’t want a mate. I don’t want a male.’ She wanted a human man.”

This is super super significant to me and it is going to be a conflict when we get Elain’s book.

Relationship with violence

I think they both avoid violence, maybe even hate it, but they understand that it is necessary. They tend to be more diplomatic, especially with their loved ones and allies, but they will tear their enemies to shreds.

Page 282 of ACOTAR: “Lucien told [Amarantha] to go back to the shithole she’d crawled out of.”

Page 653 of ACOWAR: “Elain stepped out of a shadow behind him, and rammed Truth-teller to the hilt through the back of the king’s neck as she snarled in his ear, ‘don’t you touch my sister.’”

Aspects of their personalities

Their personalities are pretty different but they have some key similarities that I think stick out:

Can be reserved and also bold

They can be both reserved and bold. We see Lucien being courteous in ACOWAR when first arriving in the NC but he obviously did not trust the IC. Holds back his frustration and sadness with Elain. He avoids talking in conversations but you know he’s definitely thinking. And Elain is very much like that too, and her boldness is starting to grow more which we can see in ACOSF.

Encourages people to have an attitude with them

With Lucien’s boldness and Elain’s newfound boldness, they encourage people to have an attitude with them to kindle a better relationship.

Page 92 of ACOTAR: “Do you ever stop being such a prick?” I (Feyre) snapped back. Dead—really, truly, I should have been dead for that. But Lucien grinned at me. “Much better.”

Page 597 of ACOSF: “‘Oh, fuck you,” Nesta snapped, and then choked. Elain blinked. Nesta blinked back, horror lurching through her. And then Elain burst out laughing…’You never said such a thing to me! I think that’s a good sign, isn’t it?’”

These two parts are so similar to me!

Good, loyal people

Lucien is very much a rake and can be a bit of a snarky asshole, but he can be a gentleman. He is loyal, generous, and overall a goodhearted person. We see this when he helps Feyre UTM, at the Cauldron with Elain. When he and Feyre first arrive in the NC in ACOWAR, he is wary and curt at first but he is polite, courteous and respectful after.

And so many people talk about Elain’s goodness. Feyre admires that she still has these traits after everything which is this quote, Nesta talks about it in ACOSF, so do the IC.

Page 258 of ACOTAR: “I marveled at it, actually—that those years of poverty hadn’t stripped away that light from Elain. Perhaps buried a bit, but she was generous, loving, and kind—a woman I found myself proud to know, to call sister.”

Their innate goodness despite everything they've both been through is something they have in common.

I think to end this, I have to talk about what these similarities mean, and my biases are coming in as a person who loves Elucien, but I think these similarities are set up for a reason. They are similar in a lot of ways and the differences they have will cause conflict and spark and chemistry that SJM loves to write in her romances. There has been a lot set up for them. Lucien travels often while Elain does not, Lucien has met Papa Archeron and admires him. I didn’t mention this before but both of them have so much symbolism with light which is super significant. And as I mentioned, conflict. Conflict is important in SJMs romances, she said in this interview in 2020 that a love interest needs to have conflict and a spark. The issues they both have with clinging on to their old lovers and avoiding each other are going to be brought up, why wouldn’t it? Lucien is a male that is rakish and loves banter and SJM loves that in a love interest, so I think there is a huge potential of him bringing out Elain’s boldness once they start being comfortable in each other’s presence. And we have already seen it before but Elain can bring out the gentleman who shows his love.

You don’t have to like Elucien, you don’t have to see any chemistry, but their story isn’t over yet, and whether we get them as a couple or not, these similarities are going to be important, the conflict they have will be explored. And I’m very excited.

This is a summary of my TikTok video I made btw! If you wish to check that out, my username on there is also olenvasynyt. And if you found this post because of my TikTok, then hi lmao

#elucien #lucien vanserra #a court of thorns and roses #elain archeron #acotar #tiktok video summary

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starshipsofstarlord · 10 months

Text

Stereotypical Sociopath

kai parker works other tvd works main masterlist

Summary-> in attempts to avoid Kai, you go to the one place where he is least welcome, the Salvatore Boarding House. But nothing, even your own stubbornness is ever enough to keep him away from you. He always gets what he wants… (1.7k)

Warnings-> 18+ minors dni, smut, fwb, dirty talk, daddy kink, blowjob, degradation, fingering, unprotected sex

There were a lot of things that you could say about Kai Parker, he was selfish and homicidal and down right annoying. You couldn’t remember how Kai had first gotten you into his bed, it had all been a blur of haste insults that you had fired at the witch, you had pounded your fists against his chest until they were removing his shirt from his body. It was never meant to happen again after the first collision of your bodies, it was a one time thing you had told yourself.

But the sex continued to happen, time and time again, from the bathroom of the grill to against a tree in the woods, and many more places that you were too embarrassed to admit. Every time that you saw him there was a lustful shadow overbearing his eyes, you tried to avoid him in any social setting, and so instead of venturing somewhere public, you decided for somewhere that you visioned as a safe place. The Salvatore Boarding House. It was quiet by the entryway, or as far as you could hear, which surprised you. Often times than not, since Jeremy and Elena had moved into the residency, there was more life that had been brought into it. Having your childhood friends now live within the brothers’ domain inclined you to visit more regularly, even when there wasn’t a supernatural crisis.

Despite the lack of people in your peripheral, you continued to walk the hallway that was no doubt older than you were. It was eerie and suspiciously quiet, there was usually at least one person home. You treated lightly, holding in your breath, almost afraid of what could lie ahead. “Elena? Damon?” Just as you had expected, there was no response to your calling, you could only sigh and plop down on the couch, grabbing yourself a crystallised glass of Damon’s precious bourbon, swirling the contents around until you burned your throat with the distilled substance.

“Drinking alone I see…” the intruder’s voice made you jump as an electric swarm rose up your spine, the expensive glass slipping from your disturbed grasp and shattering into dozens of shards upon the wooden flooring. As your head snapped up to meet his cold eyes, you were figuratively compelled to flood with overbearing desire. Malachai goddamn Parker, it was impossible for him to leave you alone! It was infuriating, you were angry and horny at the same time, and it was all his fault. You groaned, none of your efforts to escape the curse that kept gravitating the two of you towards one another appeared to be working. “I didn’t mean to make you jump pretty girl, unless it was on top of me.” The bastard had the nerve to smirk, and upon reaction you flew to stand on your feet, standing before his smug self, his pleasure only radiating irritancy out of yourself. “Or you could be beneath me, I’m happy either way Y/N.”

“Will you please shut up for once in your life Kai?” He was really annoying you now, more so when he raised his brows, no doubt taking your words as an explicit suggestion. And so you raised your hand, swiftly bringing it towards his face to brandish him with a smack, however the witch caught your wrist, tutting disappointedly at your attempt of retaliation. “Naughty girl.” It was impossible to not melt from his degradation, feeling small as he dragged you closer towards him. “What would your little friends think if they knew that you were running around with the devil behind their backs? They would be so ashamed with all the things we have done, especially when they discover how much you crave the thrill. But is it really thrill that you can’t get enough of, or is it just my cock?” Kai was crude as he filled your head with these scenarios, you’d never admit it to him or anyone else, but you had a hunger for more. Perhaps if he wasn’t the sociopath that he had been forged into by his traditional coven, then things could have possibly turned out differently.

“Kai…” he faked a condescending pout as you spoke his name, his lips lingering just over yours, pinching your chin between his thumb and forefinger, his grey blue eyes sending a variation of emotions into your mortal soul. “That’s not my name sweet cheeks. Now why don’t you get down on your knees like a good little girl for daddy, and apologise to him in the way you do best?” He helped you sink down to be sat on your knees, submitted to him to appease his own pleasures. This was the confines of your friends’ home, it was more than wrong to be doing this here, but you were helplessly seduced as Kai released his belt from the grip around his waist, and undid his jeans, pulling them down so that his boxer covered hard on was mere inches from your awaiting lips. You hated yourself as you remembered that you had gone out of your way to keep your distance from the siphon, and you were stupid for doing so. This was exactly what you wanted, for the big of you to be entangled in a passionate mess, despite the terrible logic that scolded your brain for going on a forbidden adventure with your heart.

“Yes daddy,” It was too late for you, once again you were cradled by Kai’s trap, and you were willing to comply with everything that he said. He smiled at your obedience, finally giving into your needy expression and undressing his length, making you drool as you grew threateningly hungry for it. There was already precum oozed at his tip, he pushed it towards your mouth and you opened up wide for him, engulfing his cock past your lips, tearing a heavenly moan from the man who strewed his hands through the lengths of your hair, guiding your movements to pleasure himself.”i could spend all day with you like this.” He praised you, curing your locks around his knuckles so that he could force you to take him deeper. His tip abuse the back of your throat, gagging sounds emitting from you as tears dwelled in your eyes, planning to jump and run down your face.

Nevertheless it would be the worst thing imaginable if the whole charade the two of you were playing was to stop. The sex was mind blowing, but other than that you enjoyed being close to him, despite all the things he had done and proceeded to do. Without the bedding relations that you shared with Kai, he would be nothing more than your enemy. You felt as though he was just that as he pulled your head away from his lubricated cock, frowning menacingly up at him, though he silenced the argument that dared to spill with his lips, encompassing you in the moment as he smoothly laid you upon the ancient sofa, clambering atop of you as his fingers snuck under the shadow of your skirt, teasing you before plunging his digits into your cunt, breathing in your moans as he refused to disassociate his lips from your own. “Kai… fuck. I love you and your fingers.” Your eyes blew open widely as you realised that you had spoken your admission, and Kai paused, making you worry with every nerve in your body.

“Took your time to say it gorgeous.” He smiled, a genuine, toothy smile, and it felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders; he hadn’t even punished you for referring to him by his name, which was significantly unusual. Kai bowed down so that he could press a feather light kiss onto your forehead, a warmth of safety and acceptance washing over your body. “I love this pretty pussy of yours, but not as much as I think I love you.” He, after his long pause, continued to hammer his fingers into you, as though he hadn’t just made a large step into his progress of being a better man and feeling something that made him visibly human. He was experiencing a little thing called growth, and it made your heart swell from realising it. Though that clearly wasn’t on his mind once he removed his fingers from within your walls, sucking tour juices from around them as he situated himself, rubbing the head of his cock along your slit, plunging it in, causing you to euphorically cry out, having to bite his shoulder to muffle the pattern of noises that your brain arranged for you to release. “Oh my god.”

“Oh my god indeed. Seriously, what is wrong with you Y/N?” A new voice spoke, directed in the opposing direction as they had turned themself away to save their eyes from the sight. You were screwed, figuratively and physically as you ushered Kai off of you, knowing damn well that Damon, and who you could see from the back as Elena were repulsed by the choices that you had made. It was going to be a long explanation that would be worthy of some defence, but no matter what, you couldn’t disregard the love that you and Kai had uncovered. The witch sighed as he stood, having tucked himself away as Damon finally saw it for to turn around. “Come on Damon, our good little Y/N has to explore her deepest, darkest parts somehow. And on my part it’s from the inside out.” And that was no doubt through him, however the vampire shook his midnight locked head.

“I’m not on about you two screwing, we all realised that the two of you were fucking behind the scenes quite early on. But you broke my glass! How many am I expected to replace because of your slippery fingers? Don’t even get me started on when Lockwood was wolfing out on you and you smashed one in his face. Or…” he continued with his infinite examples, and you were aware whilst his present concern were his bourbon glasses, that he wasn’t pleased with the idea of you and Kai, it wasn’t his choice, and nothing he said could change the way you felt. And after all, you could always break another glass.

#kai parker smut #kai parker x reader #kai parker imagine #kai parker fluff #kai parker x you #kai parker x y/n #kai parker fanfiction #kai parker fic #vampire diaries smut #chris wood smut #chris wood x reader #vampire diaries fanfiction #vampire diaries imagine #the vampire diaries x reader

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