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emberfrostlovesloki · 7 months

Text

Melancholia [Hotch x Reader]

Photo credits: Right (@optimistic-nihilist) Center (@vivienvalentino) sent to me via my love (@sadgirlzluvdilfs) Right (@citronplume)

Prompt: Characters both duck for cover under the same tiny storefront when it starts pouring, aka, how the reader met Aaron. Also, the reader is feeling down due to the seasonal changes, and Aaron is there to give her some love and support.

Category: Hurt/comfort/fluff

Word Count: 6.7K

Content Warnings: Mentions of mental health (depression and seasonal depression), mention of eating (reader has missed some meals), light drinking, minor language

A/N: This is another one-shot inspired by @imagining-in-the-margins Meet Cute Writing Challenge and this one is actually a meet-cute! The reader is also a non-BAU member. I’ve been having the seasonal sads, so this is sort of based on my feelings a bit. Given that World Mental Health Day was earlier this week I just want to say that you matter! You are loved, and I am so happy you are here. There is not shame in getting help or just talking to someone. I’m very grateful for my friends on here and my messages are always open. If you liked this story, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! I hope you have a great rest of your week - Levi.

List with all stories

_y/n_ = your name

_y/f/b_ = your favorite book

_y/e/c_ = your eye color

_l/n_ = your last name

_y/b/f_ = your best friend

_y/b/f’s/n_ = your best friends name

_y/f/a_ = your favorite artist

_y/c/f_ = your comfort food.

_y/n_ checked the weather diligently every morning before she got ready for the day. As someone who had a penchant for keeping up with her favorite aesthetic look, knowing what the weather was going to be for the day was a must. _y/n_ had not planned for a total and utter flood to come down from a sky that was promised to be ‘clear and sunny’ all day. It had started out as just a few drops, but soon it was an unrelenting pelting of water on the pavement. The street offered little cover, and _y/n_ moved more quickly down the road looking for any relief. Finally, she saw it in the small awning of a local bookstore she liked. There was just one small issue, there was already someone standing under the protected space. ‘What the hell,’ _y/n_ thought. She would rather be uncomfortably close to a stranger than continue to get soaked through. At this point the outfit she had picked for the day was a bust anyway, so why not lose a little dignity while she was at it. Thankfully the tall man saw her coming and moved as far to the side as the space allowed. Even with this being the case when _y/n_ slipped under the awning the two of them were standing with their shoulders essentially pressed together. They avoided looking at each other for a moment due to the awkwardness of their close quarters. However, the feeling passed and the man said in a low tenor voice, “This is some storm we’re having here.” At hearing the man’s smooth, even voice, _y/n_ turned her head his way and actually looked him over for the first time. He was tall, as she had seen before, but now that she was next to him, his height was more noticeable. He was more prepared for the weather than _y/n_ had been, but he was still pretty soggy with his shot hair sticking to his forehead slightly. The man was also fit. _y/n_ could tell from the way his nice clothes sat on his body. The stranger might have been wet, but he was also warm. Standing this close to him, _y/n_ could feel the warmth coming off of him in waves. For a moment _y/n_ wondered if the man was sick, but he didn’t look pale or flushed; he looked perfectly fine as a matter of fact. More than just fine. _y/n__ internally berated herself for thinking that a total stranger was attractive, but she couldn’t help herself. It took _y/n_ a second to realize that she hadn’t yet responded to the man’s comment about the storm and quickly said, “Oh yeah. This is like Biblical or something. Do you think we should start building an arc?” _y/n_ meant to make a joke, and she cringed at her own choice of words even as they came out of her mouth. Thankfully the man made what sounded like a small chuckle or laugh, though in all honestly, it might have just been him letting out a breath. Either way _y/n_ didn’t want to think about it too hard out of embarrassment.

Hotch watched the young woman move down the soaked sidewalks, her eyes looking for a place to land that wouldn’t mean a bucket of water being poured repeatedly on one's head over and over again like being in the open was. There really only was one place for her to go, and that was next to him under the awning of the bookstore he had hoped to stop in on before heading to Morgan’s. The team was celebrating Emily’s birthday, and even though he had a gift and card for Prentiss, both of which he hoped weren’t ruined by the rain, he had wanted to get her something extra. Prentiss had been going through a lot the last couple of months and he wanted to support her in the little ways he could. The book he had wanted to buy was taunting him from the illuminated window. It was Zadie Smith’s new novel, The Fraud. He had also been hoping to get Jack a new book to read to him at bedtime as well. As much as Aaron liked The Little Prince and the few other stories he often read to Jack before bed, he had to admit that he was slightly sick of them. However, the bookstore had been closed, ‘Due to a family emergency’ the sign on the front door had read. At that point, the skies had opened and he found refuge under the small awning. Now the woman was near to him, and in another second she was next to him, pressed close due to the limited space offered by the covering. Hotch moved infinitesimally to the left to give them both a bit of breathing room. There was a slight awkwardness to the closeness of their bodies, and Hotch took that moment to look the woman over. She was younger than him, he assumed, and not dressed for the weather. Neither was he really, but at least he had a jacket. The woman must have been freezing, as she looked soaked to the bone and her bare shoulders kept catching water droplets from the leaky awning. For a moment Hotch had the idea of taking off his jacket and giving it to the woman. And then he had the more outrageous thought that if they stood face to face, there would be more space for them to be dry. Aaron quickly swiped the thoughts out of his brain. Internally Aaron thought, ‘God get a grip Hotchner. You sound like someone from a dime store romance novel.’

Aaron resisted the urge to sigh at his life at the moment. He was attempting, keyword attempting, to put himself out there more. It had been a few months since Hailey had left him, and he had tried his best to process the loss of his best friend and wife. They were still amicable, and hearing it from her side of things helped Aaron make sense of her choice -- even if it still hurt him. Rossi had been supportive of Aaron trying it out with a few women just to see. None of his attempts so far had been very successful. He was on a few apps and when he matched with people he tended to panic. The idea of having to open up to essentially total strangers never sat right with him. What would he say? “Hey I work for the FBI and I can tell when you’re lying, and I work 70+ hours a week, and I’ll be gone a good deal of the time, and I have more classified secrets than you can guess?” It all felt a bit overwhelming to him. Not only was it overwhelming, but it was demeaning also. Trying to figure out if he liked a woman based on a few photos and a blurb about their life and experiences just didn’t sit right with him. For a moment he let his mind wander. He wished he could just meet someone naturally, but he knew such occurrences were rare in life, particularly for someone his age. Finally, he pulled himself together and bridged the gap between the woman and him to end the silence lingering between them by saying something about the rain. The woman looked up and over him before responding with a joke. He nearly laughed before responding, “I don’t think we have the time or materials. We might be fated to drown.” His reply caused the woman to laugh, and it was a soft sweet sound, like ice being poured into a crystal glass. The sound was quickly muffled by the rain and the sound of an approaching car. The sidewalk with the awning was very near the street and as the car passed it sloshed a large dirty wave up and around the woman’s legs. The woman said, “Eww” as the extra wetness moved over her body. She stepped back a bit as another car came quickly down the street. Aaron, rather protectively, moved his body in front of the woman taking the splash of water himself.

_y/n_ didn’t expect the man to move in front of her and as he positioned his body to get wet instead of her, she raised an arm, ever so briefly touching his back. She was going to say, “You don’t have to do that,” but he had already gotten wet and the car was far down the street before she had the thought. The man turned to face her, and they were so close to each other, just an inch or so apart that she could feel his warm breath on her face. Looking up at the handsome man caused her brain to stutter for a moment, and she didn’t even realize that her pupils were beginning to dilate, and there was a small blush blossoming over her face. However, the man did. When _y/n_ had composed herself, she finally said, “Thank you for doing that. You didn’t have to.” The man gave her a small smile and replied, “It’s my pleasure.” He seemed like he was going to say more, but the ping of his phone made him stop. He pulled his iPhone from the pocket of his shirt and seemed to nod at the screen. The man put the phone back where it had come from and then returned his attention to _y/n_. He asked, “How far are you going in this storm? I’m assuming you’re not planning on standing here forever?” There was a sort of mirth in his expression that made _y/n_ momentarily be warmed from the inside. Being this close to a stranger would normally make _y/n_ uncomfortable, but there was something about this man that was inherently non-threatening. She answered his question honestly saying, “I actually really need to get a move on. I was trying to make it to the subway station on 19th Street. It’s only three blocks down from here.” The man nodded undid one of the inner zippers of his jacket and pulled out a folded copy of the days New York Times. _y/n_ could see a fancy car pull up near them and stall. For one fleeting moment, she had a bad feeling about this man and a waiting car, but it was only a moment as he extended the paper toward her and said, “Sorry it’s not much. Maybe you could hold it over your head while you walk? I have to run myself, but have a good rest of your day.” And with that, the man turned around and walked into the rain. His shoulders were hunched as the water hit him once more, and he half-jogged to the Corvette on the street. She could just barely hear the start of a conversation as the stranger closed the door of the car. Now that she had just a slight cover, _y/n_ placed the paper over her head and moved back onto the wet sidewalk as well. She gave the car one final wave as she ran down the road.

Rossi pulled up and watched as Aaron stood very close to a woman under an awning taking a beating from the rain. He didn’t have a good chance to see exactly what the woman looked like, but he could tell that she was invested in whatever Aaron was saying to her. Rossi sighed softly. He knew that Hotch often beat himself up about meeting new people. He was also still beating himself up about Hailey. Rossi wished that his friend could see that people, women, were actually interested in him. That they wouldn’t pick apart his every flaw or see the guilt that he felt. Not that the woman Aaron was talking to was ‘the one,’ just that people would care about him if he allowed it to happen. If he was vulnerable. Aaron moved toward the car and opened the door, leaning down to sit in the passenger seat. Rossi turned to Hotch and teasingly said, “Having a nice conversation over there?” Aaron scoffed and said, “It was fine.” Aaron could hear the deeper jesting tone in Rossi’s words, and he was reminded of how many times Dave had been his hype man like he was in his teens going on his first real date. Aaron didn’t mind it as long as he wasn’t being patronized. For now, it was just a reminder of his own personal failings. Hotch didn’t notice, but as he had gotten into the car, there was a tinge of color on his cheeks; Rossi did.

_y/n_ never expected to see the good-looking man from the rainstorm again, but as fortune would have it, she did. _y/n_ was out at the park taking a stroll and doing some reading a few weeks later. The weather was much improved and the crisp air was perfect to spend a few hours outside exploring her new surroundings. She’d just moved into the neighborhood a few months ago, and due to her busy work-life balance, she hadn’t really gotten to know the area yet. A coworker had recommended Theodore Rosevelt Island Park as a nice place to spend the afternoon and had promised that it wasn’t super busy or loud. The coworker had been right. The park was beautiful. The sprawling trails offered variety a of scenery. _y/n_ had picked a simple hilly paved trail to just enjoy the weather and the crisp smell of fall. After around an hour of walking, she settled down on the grass and started reading _y/f/b_. After another hour, _y/n_ felt her eyes growing heavy with sleep, and she sat up to get ready to leave. As she shifted to her feet, a glint of sunlight from the ground caught her attention. She stood and moved three yards over to where she had seen the light coming from. The source was a lost phone whose back-facing camera had caught the light at just the right angle to be seen by _y/n_. She picked up the lost item and clicked on the home button. The screen blinked alive. The phone only had ten percent battery left and she wondered if it had been laying out for long or if it being in the sun had drained its power banks. There were five missed calls, three from the same number and two from two separate numbers. _y/n_ assumed that the owner of the phone had gone to separate people in the park and asked to use their phone to call the lost one to see if anyone would pick up. _y/n_ checked and the sound was off, so even that strategy wouldn’t have worked anyway unless someone had found the phone. Otherwise, no one would have heard it go off. As _y/n_ walked back to her spot, trying to think about how to get the lost item back to its owner. While she looking at the little boy who was on the phone’s home screen, it vibrated in her hand with a number with no name attached to it. _y/n_ swiped the answer button and said, “Hello?” There was a small silence on the other side of the line as if whoever had been calling was surprised someone had picked up. Finally, the person, a man, said, “Hey. I lost my phone about a half hour ago and, well you found it. Could I come to you and get it?” The man on the other end sounded slightly breathless. His voice sounded oddly familiar. _y’n_ was sure she had heard it before somewhere but couldn’t place it. _y/n_ responded to the man’s question saying, “I’m on the Drivesdale scenic loop. There’s that big oak tree if you know it. I’m under that tree.” The man replied, “I do know it. I can be there in about ten minutes if you can wait?” _y/n_ nodded and said, “Of course. I’ll be here.” There was an odd silence before _y/n_ heard a muttered reply on the other end of the line before the phone call ended.

_y/n_ knew the man the second he rounded the corner in the bend in the path. It was the guy from the day that it was raining buckets. He was far less soggy now, and he was wearing a black t-shirt and back jogging shorts that highlighted his distinct calf muscles. His shirt also emphasized his forearms which seemed strong. _y/n_ wished she could think about other things other than the physical attributes of the man quickly jogging toward her, except that was all she had to go off of. That and the fact that he knew someone who owned a fancy sports car. _y/n_ stood as the man drew near.

Aaron was highly annoyed at himself for losing his phone. How he hadn’t noticed its weight missing from his pocket baffled him. He wasn’t sure how far he had moved since the phone made its mysterious disappearance. Today was a long run day for him, and he had moved around twelve miles according to his Apple watch. He briefly, sarcastically, thanked god that it wasn’t his work phone that had gone missing. But that would never happen. His FBI-issued phone stayed in a zipped pocket on the inside of his shirt and it stayed on all the time. Aaron had asked a few people if she could use their phones to see if someone had picked up the lost item, and he was close to despair and thinking he would have to go back home and try the ‘find my iPhone app. A wave of relief washed over Aaron as someone picked up for his last attempt at finding the phone while not having to leave the park. He listened to the location of the person who had it and confirmed that he would be right over. He ended the call and thanked the kind elderly woman who had let him use her phone. Hotch set out on a brisk jog, not wanting the woman holding his phone to wait longer than needed.

Hotch had found himself worn out over the last few cases. Not that they were the worst cases he had ever seen, but the continued horrors and depravity he saw on a weekly basis were wearing on his morale. He was also tired. He’d done his normal pre-workout routine, but the energy drink and warm-up didn’t seem to have its normal effects. Hotch blamed both of these emotional blightes for his losing his phone and his not noticing. As he rounded the corner toward the big oak tree, there were very few people around and he saw the woman he was sure he had talked to a few moments before. As he got closer to the woman, it took him a moment to realize that he had seen her before. As he scanned through his memories of the past weeks, he clocked her as the person he had been stranded with under the bookstore awning. She looked lovely and calm as she was clearly scanning the area for him. Hotch had thought she looked good the day he had first met her, with her bright _y/e/c_ eyes standing out on her slightly flushed face. But now that she was dry and more relaxed, Hotch could appreciate her in a more natural environment. Aaron took a sharp breath in as he remembered how close they had been standing next to each other, he looked down at her as the cars passed by, splashing his legs and soaking his socks further. There was also that brief moment as her hand had touched his upper back. Aaron cleared his throat and moved those thoughts somewhere deeper in his mind. Somewhere fantasy could take root if he wasn’t careful. Hotch put on a small smile as he stopped in front of the woman. She was holding out his phone for him, and he reached out for it. After the cool metal was in his left hand, he extended his right hand and said, “Thank you so much for finding this. It’s a pleasure seeing you again. I see you survived the rain.” There was a beat of silence, and then he added, “I’m Aaron, Hotchner by the way.”

_y/n_ smiled up at Aaron and took his hand in hers. He gave it a firm yet steady shake and she said, “I’m _y/n_, _l.n_. What a surprise to see you again. How have you been?” _y/n_ wasn’t sure why she asked the last questions, but it felt natural. She was also distracted by his scent. He was sweaty, but there was a sort of brine to the scent. Like when one stood next to the seashore at twilight. When Aaron responded, she smiled and said, “I’m glad you’re doing well. I’ve gotta head out, but it was nice to see you again, Aaron. I hope you have a good rest of your weekend.” _y/n_ didn’t particularly have to go anywhere, but she had the sinking feeling that if she stayed around the figure that was Aaron Hotchner, she might say something silly or stupid, and for some reason, she didn’t want to seem like that to him. As she had the first time they met, she gave a small wave and moved down the path. Again, she thought this was the last time that she would see him.

They were destined to meet again three weeks later at the local bar in the neighborhood. Seated at a small table, _y/n_ shared her new life updates with _y/b/f_ who was visiting for the weekend. _y/n_ had just covered the rainstorm incident and she said, “And then on top of that I saw him again later in the month. Let me tell you, if I thought he was handsome in the rain, you should have seen him in his workout clothes!” _y/n_ was speaking openly and candidly given that her inhibitions were down because she had already had three drinks. Her friend who had a similar buzz said, “Okay, wait _y/n_. I’m going to need you to describe this guy in lots of detail. You always have a way with words, and I need the skinny. He sounds like a dreamboat.” _y/n_ flushed further, above the color of the alcohol that had tinged her cheeks. _y/n_ looked at _y/b/f_, and they had an expectant look on their face. _y/n_ couldn't help but giggle before saying, “Well he’s tall, and he has dark hair. It’s cut short and neat from what I can tell, though both times I’ve seen him it’s been a bit disheveled. He’s fit. I mean, I saw him working out, and the first time I saw him his clothes were pretty much hugging his body. And man what a body he has. Apart from his name, and his looks, I don’t have that much more to go off of. When I found his phone there was a picture of a little boy on his lock screen. For all I know he might be married or in a serious relationship. That doesn’t mean that I don’t find him attractive, but I’d never do something with a man who was committed.” If _y/n_ was being honest with herself, she’d probably never do anything with the man ever? What could she possibly say if she even saw him again? The world was small, but not that small. _y/n_ had relegated him to a small dreamlike crush to think back on every now and then. _y/n_ took another sip of her cocktail to try and hide her blush from her friend. The door to the small bar opened and her friend, who was facing the door, looked at the large group that was entering the establishment. The final person to enter the bar caught _y/n_’s friend's eye, and they said, “I think your man just came in here.” _y/n_ incredulously said, “Oh please, _y/b/f_, don’t tease me like that. It’s bad enough that I haven’t dated anyone seriously in years.” _y/b/f_ sobered slightly and said, “No _y/n_, I’m being serious. The last guy that just came in kind of matches the description you just gave.”

_y/n_ rolled her eyes but looked behind her anyway and low and behold, it was Aaron who had walked through the door. He was with a group of six people, and he was congenially chatting with an older man and a very pretty brunette-haired woman. _y/n_ hadn’t yet seen the man so at ease, but it looked good on him. It fit. The intense blush on _y/n_’s face told her best friend that she had pointed out the correct figure and they said, “Damn, He is hot. He must live in the neighborhood or something if you keep running into him unplanned like this.” _y/n_ nodded along in agreement, and _y/b/f_ continued, “You should give him your number or buy him a drink or something while he’s here. Who knows when the next time is that you’ll see him?” At the suggestion, _y/n_ shook her head in embarrassment and said, “I don’t know _y/b/f’s/n_. What if he’s not interested?” _y/b/f_ sighed and placed a hand on _y/n’s shoulder saying, “Oh come on _y/n_. Nothing gambled, nothing gained, and all that. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? He says no, or that he’s married and then you run into him at the supermarket and it’s awkward and you move past each other in the cheese aisle? Would you just give it a chance?” _y/n_ thought about the cost-benefit of actually making a move on Aaron and found that, as her friend had said, the cost side of the equation was pretty low. After a long silence filled by the ambient hum of the noise inside the bar, _y/n_ said, “Okay, fine. But I’m going to wait for him to have a drink first and make sure he’s not overly attached to anyone in his party, and that will give me time to sober up a bit. I might be taking a risk on my behalf, but I’m sure as hell not doing it drunk.” _y/n_ moved to the bar and got herself and her friend some water. While she was waiting, the pretty brunette and the older man whom Aaron had been speaking to when the group had walked in moved next to her at the bar. As _y/n_ overheard the woman saying, “I don’t know Rossi. He looks sad to me sometimes. Like when he thinks no one is looking? I’m kind of worried for him.” The older man, Rossi, nodded and said, “I see it too. But you see it, and I see it, but Hotch? I don’t know, and I don’t think he would really appreciate us cornering him in his office and asking him about his mental health, do you?” The woman laughed and said, “That’s a big fat no from me. But you know how he gets. I’d just like to see him happy.” As the woman finished the statement, _y/n_ got her water and gave the two she had been eavesdropping on a small smile before heading back to her own table.

About a half hour later _y/n_ felt more in control of her faculties. Aaron had had two drinks and _y/n_ subtly watched him. He didn’t seem to flirting or attached to any of the women or men he was with; he also wasn’t wearing a ring which was a good start. _y/n_ moved to the bathroom to make sure she looked alright before she made her move. _y/n_ reapplied some mascara and lipstick, but she knew she was just stalling at this point. She took a deep breath and whispered, “You can do this,” as she walked out of the ladies' room. Fortunately from _y/n_, Aaron was at the bar getting a drink for himself, Morgan, and JJ. _y/n_ idled up to him and said, “Hey Aaron, fancy seeing you here. Can I get you a drink?” Hotch turned and looked down at _y/n_. He was a bit tipsy given that he had two drinks in a pretty fast period. Hotch looked over the woman who kept appearing in his life and said, “Hey again _y/n_. We can’t seem to escape each other.” He looked over her face and saw the tells of attraction. He took a steadying breath as he realized that he was also attracted to _y/n_. He cleared his throat before saying “And you can buy me a drink if you like.” _y/n_ beamed. She had fully expected him to say no, and she asked, “What’ll it be?” Hotch thought for a moment and said, “Margarita on the rocks please.” When the bartender came over _y/n_ ordered two margaritas on the rocks. _y/n_ Aaron chatted while they waited for the drinks and at the of the night, in a moment of inebriation and a bit of teasing from Morgan, Aaron had given his number to _y/n_.

In a small moment of vulnerability for both of them, they had started texting on and off. Then they had had their first date and it had gone well. Then they had a second, and a third, and Aaron realized that _y/n_ was steady, calm, and kind. She wasn’t bothered by his extended absences, or him having to change their plans often because of a case. _y/n_ had slowly started meeting the important people in his life. It had been Morgan first. That happened kind of by accident. Then there was Rossi and Em, and Jack of course. By all means their relationship should be growing, and they would have their rocky moments, but happiness and care should be blooming, but for _y/n_ it simply wasn’t. A sadness was tugging at her soul like a millstone.

She was lying in bed; she had been all day. It was 11:00 a.m. The day outside looked pretty as the leaves fell and soft light came through the window. She had barely had the will to open the blinds. She had been crying a few minutes earlier but had managed to stop the flow of tears eventually. All _y/n_ had wanted to do over the past few days was sleep. Sleep and cry. She had managed to keep up her hygiene a bit because she had to look and dress professionally for work, but if that wasn’t the case, she knew she wouldn’t have done any of her normal care routines. Her hair was on its last legs with dry shampoo, and she could feel it getting greasy and gross on the pillow. A sound at the door caught _y/n_’s attention. ‘Aaron,’ she thought. She had forgotten that he was coming over today. She tried to find the will to get up, but she was embarrassed about her current state both mentally and physically. She turned her back to her bedroom door and sniffled. Maybe if she didn’t answer he would leave? There was a second of silence and then there was a ping of her phone. _y/n_ was sure that it was Aaron asking if she was okay. Then after that, there was a call and she could hear Aaron’s voice from outside saying, “_y/n_ are you in there? Are you okay?” There was worry in Aaron’s voice and she cringed because it was so silly to be sad right now. She thought it was too early in their relationship for him to see her so sad.

Aaron stood outside _y/n_’s door. There was a small panic rising in him. He had texted and called with no response from _y/n_. There was an eerie quiet outside her door. Normally at this time, she’d have her vinyl playing _y/f/a_ and making some coffee or reading. Hotch could picture it and it made him feel warm for a moment. But he didn’t feel that warmth now. He sensed that something was wrong, and he called out saying, “_y/n_ if you’re in there I’m coming in, okay.” Aaron punched in _y/n_’s seven-digit code, and the door clicked open. There was no one in the kitchen or living area and the lights were off. He checked the bathroom and it was also empty. Aaron called for _y/n_ saying, “_y/n_ are you here?” More softly he said, “God, please be here.” Hotch moved to the bedroom door and gave a hesitant knock saying her name again. There was a soft sound from inside and, fearing the worst, he opened the door. When his eyes fell on _y/n_'s form under a bundle of sheets and blankets, he let out a momentary sigh of relief. He stepped into the semi-dark room and approached the bed saying gently, “_y/n_, are you alright?” _y/n_ was faced away from him and said, “I’m sorry, Aaron. Give me a few minutes and I’ll be alright.” She spoke so softly that Aaron almost didn’t hear her. There was a sadness in her voice that pulled at his heart, and his concern for her only grew. Hotch sat on the edge of the bed and placed a hand on her upper arm asking, “Honey, would you please look at me. I need to see you.” Hotch needed to know if she was alright. Sluggishly _y/n_ moved from her side and onto her stomach. She turned her face toward Aaron, and he assessed her. It was clear to him right away that she had been crying. Her tear streaks marked her face and her eyes were red and bloodshot. Aaron rested a hand on her cheek and said, “Sweetheart please tell me what’s wrong. You’ve been crying.” _y/n_ sniffled and said, “It’s nothing, it’s stupid.” At hearing _y/n_ say this, Aaron turned to face her more directly and sincerely said, “Whatever it is, it’s not stupid to me. I wanna know why you’re sad.” He leaned down and kissed her forehead. There was silence as _y/n_ thought about what to say. Finally, she responded with, “I’m just sad, Aaron, and I have no right to be. I have everything I could want. I have a job I like. I’m finally stable in my life. I have you and Jack, and I’m still so fucking sad, over nothing.” While she spoke the tears started falling again.

Aaron listened and his heart ached for the pain _y/n_ was feeling. He brushed his hand down her cheek and then moved his thumb to wipe away the tears falling on her face. Tenderly he said, “Darling, I’m so sorry. You’re allowed to feel sad, even if there’s not a reason. And you’re allowed to be sad near me; it’s not embarrassing.” _y/n_ made a small sound as she pressed her forehead to his thigh. Aaron wondered if this was an attempt to hide from him. He looked down at her and asked, “May I hold you, _y/n_” _y/n_ sniffled but nodded yes to his request. Aaron leaned down and undid the laces of his loafer and kicked them both off with his other foot. He slipped his jacket off and moved to the other side of the bed. He pushed up the covers and lay down. When he was settled a bit, he pulled _y/n_ close to his body. When she was cradled close to him, he could feel her relax. Aaron ran a hand up and down her side as he asked, “Have you felt this way before? Have you spoken to your therapist about these feelings?”

_y/n_ felt better being close to Aaron. She responded to his question saying, “I have sometimes. When the weather starts changing and the days get shorter it can get really bad. I’ve been okay for the last year or so, but now it’s back. I haven’t told my therapist yet. I was going to in our next session. I had kind of hoped that it would just go away, but it hasn’t obviously.” Aaron hummed and moved his hand to her stomach, rubbing soft circles over the flesh there. Next, he asked, “And you’re still taking your medication?” At this, _y/n_ actually chuckled and said, “I have. I know what happens when I stop taking those and it’s not pretty.” Aaron felt a tiny bit better hearing her laugh and make a joke. The feeling in the room lightened slightly. The silence lingered for a few minutes and Aaron broke it saying, “Would you like to stay here for a little bit?” In his arms _y/n_ sighed and said, “Yes please.” Aaron shifted in the bed so his head was resting near her neck, and he circled his arms around her protectively. He planted a few kisses on the nape of _y/n_’s neck and then stilled his movements as she quickly fell asleep. Aaron looked her over. He was glad that she found comfort in him. His embrace. He would have to do more research on seasonal depression because although he knew it was a type of depression, he didn’t know much about it. The only person that he maybe knew had issues like that was Spencer, as his younger agent had once told him that he had worse thoughts during the winter. But for now, he would just be there to support _y/n_. Her health and happiness were paramount to him, and he was going to do everything he could to make her feel alright.

After an hour, Aaron and _y/n_ woke and Aaron thought of something. He asked, “When is the last time you’ve eaten, darling?” The moment it took for her to answer told Aaron what he needed to know. When _y/n_ replied, “It was yesterday at breakfast.” Aaron frowned at the answer and said, “Alright. Well, how about we get some food? We could make something here or I could order something for us?” _y/n_ thought and said, “There’s not much in the fridge. Maybe we could order some _y/c/f_ ?” Aaron replied and said, “Of course, I’ll place the order now.” Aaron pulled out his phone and opened Uber Eats to get the food. After this, they both moved to the living area. Aaron opened some blinds to let some light into the room but chose not to turn on any of the overhead lighting to create a calm environment. He turned on the TV and put on Seinfeld putting the volume on low to give them some ambient noise. _y/n_ sat on the couch and Aaron pulled her into his arms while they waited for the food to arrive. Aaron moved to stroke her hair, and as he started, she cringed slightly. He stopped his movements and asked, “What is it, _y/n_?”_y/n_ felt the shame rise in her again as she said, “It’s dirty. My hair. I haven’t washed it in three days.” Aaron nodded and said, “It’s okay, _y/n. I don’t mind.” _y/n_ softly said, “Okay.” She believed him and rested her head against his chest again. Aaron started gently combing through her hair with his hands. _y/n_ listened to the steady thumping of his heart near her ear, and her hands found a place on his stomach. When he sat, Aaron had a little tummy that hid the muscles of his torso. It was actually one of the favorite parts of his body. They hadn’t been undressed in front of the other yet, but when they were, she looked forward to paying that area extra attention. _y/n_ knew that just being with Aaron wasn’t going to fix her mental health problems. She would have to face the emotions and it might hurt, but it was worth it. For now, Aaron was a balm and a light, and she looked forward to moving forward with him in life. She knew that with Aaron by her side, better days were coming. That the sun would shine a bit brighter than it had before.

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animehouse-moe · 10 months

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Mobile Suit Gundam - The Witch From Mercury S2 Episode 11: Unrelenting Tenderness

Ah, nothing like being stressed out for an entire episode as to whether or not Suletta will succumb to the high permet score, or if Guel will end up killed by Lauda or kill another family member, or if our Elan will go off and die like the others, or this that and the other thing, all to get faked out for the real danger/moment. Incredible work on the episode that skirts around a more high level narrative to instead approach characters head on to unify them for this "final" episode to come, so certainly lots to talk about!

Well actually, sort of unexpectedly, the episode starts with a Calibarn vs Aerial fight that's showing off to the max. Of course, Suletta and Eri are having their chat about ideals and what's right/what they should be doing, but I'm pretty sure most people understand what's going on, so I'll just share how absolutely cool the fighting is for these scenes.

The pacing is wild, and given the scale of the combat, I think the decision to take the objects further away from the viewer so details matter less was a great idea. It allows for incredible pace in the fight without worry of being perfect, or taking absolute ages to complete. Plus, the way the fight's constructed in three dimensional space, you still get close ups and flybys past the camera that allow you a closer glimpse into the combat. Just really, really well orchestrated combat for the feel that was desired of it.

Similarly, I love how well designed the combat style of the Calibarn is. If you notice through the sequence, Suletta isn't actually retaliating against the Gund Bits at all, rather she's purely evading them. As you'd expect of Calibarn. It's main form of movement is also its source of combat power as the, as I like to call it, "broomstick" is used for high powered propulsion through the fight. And I think that's a super cool idea for a design, especially with how this episode show it off.

But anyways, the fight rages on as Lauda engages with Guel, the Earth House + Elan + Bel, and Felsi all sortie to enter the fray as we cut to the opening.

Following the opening, and a bit more dancing around with various characters to establish where they are/what they're doing, the data storm of Quiet Zero suddenly begins to wane/fail. This is a really cool piece that reminds viewers of where Quiet Zero began. Under the supervision of Miorine's mother Notrette. It also reminds viewers about the fact that Delling Rembran continued the Quiet Zero project in secrecy, but disavowed the existence of Gundams. Anyways, I present to you the notion that Notrette still exists in the Data Storm, and that she's the one interfering with Prospera and Eri. Ericht's frustration in regards to the data storm stalling out are directed at someone, nothing something, but another person that shares a similar goal/ideal to Ericht. Prospera's comment on pest control. It all implies a lot of things, and there's not many others that would check enough boxes aside from Notrette.

We temporarily shift from Quiet Zero towards a very interesting conversation with the Space Assembly League. Given what we've known with the last while in regards to the league, I wouldn't say it was expected, but it was certainly a possibility that they would stick their nose into the situation in full. What I find most interesting about it is how much this opens up the world of GWitch. The existence of a massive space laser that's a "tool for transferring energy", and the idea that civil unrest and discord still exists on Earth, coupled with the fact that Shaddiq's character arc hasn't actually been concluded. There's a lot of moving pieces that say, "but we're not done yet!", so I'm very curious to see what comes from their involvement and the various politics surrounding the league as well as Earth.

Now, onto the most nerve-wracking and stressful part of the episode: Lauda vs Guel. My heart was in my throat this whole time. The conversation, the Gundam vs Mobile Suit, the flashback. So much of it. I'd been stressed since we saw Lauda show up in the last episode, and they certainly drew it out in today's, but the character development for Lauda in particular was outstanding.

The whole idea of the being the younger brother that just wanted to stand beside his sibling but never could rings so clearly with his words. That Guel chose Miorine over his own brother, that Guel killed their father and never told Lauda, that Guel left Lauda just as quickly as he returned. All he wants is the big brother that accepted him all those years ago, the big brother that give him the gift of a family, someone to look up to, someone to go running to when times were tough. It's an incredibly emotional piece that builds off of Guel's similar encounter with his father. It had me so scared. Going back into Lauda's memories to find Guel hug and accept Lauda, and then returning to see Guel's Dilanza embrace Lauda's Schwarzette in the same way as sparks fly and you sense the end of Guel.

I'll never forgive GWitch for scaring me that badly, but thank God Felsi had already rocketed out in her mobile suit to break up the fight. But yeah, Gigabob continues his tear of being the best boy this season, and brings his little brother Lauda under his wing finally. Incredible piece that gives Guel the chance to right the wrongs of his past with his father, and to step into the light with his burden lightened.

So with the most nerve-wracking sequence finished, we return to Earth House and Co who have infiltrated Quiet Zero and are trying to shut it down. It's tense and high stakes, and there's great moments like Bel standing up to Prospera, who represents the sins that Bel herself bears.

The real moment though is Miorine (and Notrette to a degree). Miorine is tasked with inputting the shut down code for Quiet Zero, which was originally 'Quod Erat Demonstrandum', or in the literal translation 'What Was To Be Shown'. Typically, it's used at the end of math proofs as a way to conclude them, so an interesting addition in the form of originally 'concluding' Quiet Zero while staying true to Notrette's penchant for latin phrases.

Of course, Prospera changed the code so it doesn't work, but like Eri hinted at earlier, Notrette isn't completely gone, and is still helping her daughter Miorine by providing a backdoor to which only she would know the answer: part of the genetic code of the tomatoes that her mother left behind. A really sweet piece that speaks to Notrette's love for Miorine, but also like I said further proves the existence of her within Quiet Zero/the Data Storm.

Truthfully, I think the introduction of Notrette via the data storm helps bring Suletta (and by extension Prospera) and Miorine closer as lead characters. Giving them something that's been lost, and that they struggle with through similar aspects allows them to be placed on equal footing while providing different approaches/ understandings to their unique situations.

But anyways, Quiet Zero gets shut down and the Benerit Group/Earth House/sorta Space Assembly League succeeds in their goal of defeating it. But the Space Assembly League at the top has a different idea, as they turn that weapon on Quiet Zero and fire, leaving Eri on her own to protect everyone.

I really like this piece, specifically because it's Eri's decision. It's Ericht moving to protect her mother and her little sister, and their friends and family. It's not Eri acting for the sake of Prospera, or under her order or wishes, it's one of the few scenes where Eri acts under her own agency and desire. And within that, it's incredibly ironic that she ends up destroyed.

And our episode ends here. Aerial destroyed, Quiet Zero shut down, no defenses, no protections as they stare down the barrel of the universe's most dangerous weapon.

A dire situation, one that seems to have little hope of surviving for our characters involved, but let me show you these details first.

Starting off with Prospera, her permet pattern is different. The shape is decidedly different from the usual that we see from all the other pilots/characters. Alongside that, she's not actually piloting or directly interacting with a Gundam or anything, so it shouldn't be visible in the first place. So why can we see it, and why is it different? Well, for one, she seems to use it as a way to connect/interact with Ericht and Aerial, but more than that I feel it's connected to Carbo Nado and Prospera's past with her that was teased in the prologue.

Secondly, I think it's easy to forget how Suletta refers to Aerial/Ericht, and how we're shown the girl/Gundam. Suletta commonly uses 'Miina' to refer to Aerial and her Gund Bits, which means "everyone". Suletta sees, experiences, and understands Aerial as a multitude of Ericht's, and we see them that way as well. Even in this episode we see several Ericht's that take the place/form of Gund Bits.

And if you pay attention to the wreckage, you'll notice that some of the Gund Bits from Aerial are still intact, floating around Suletta and Calibarn.

So I'm sure most know what this means, but Eri is still alive. Aerial is gone, but Ericht lives on through her Gund Bits, and will ultimately integrated with Suletta and Calibarn to form a defense against the Giant Space Laser ™️.

And that's the end of the episode, this time. For sure. Definitely. I'm really quite interested to see what they do with this final upcoming episode though. There's the potential to expand the scope of GWitch to place further focus on Earth through the Space Assembly and Shaddiq, but there's also the opportunity to call it a day with the final episode with whatever the outcome may be from that. It's a good position to find themselves in, and I think I'll be relatively satisfied with whatever they do there. So many character arcs have been resolved, and goals reached between them all. But it also doesn't mean there's an entire world for them to explore out there, for new challenges to arise or progression to be made, particularly with characters like Shaddiq and Miorine. Only time will tell though, and with a countdown of one week, we won't be left waiting long to find out.

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ndlqzrz · 4 months

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Niko is such a strange person. Not in the way he's weird but like I've never come across something like him. And I don't think I ever will. One of the reasons I like him so much is he doesn't care. He doesn't care if he's cringe or chaotic, or weird. He's so....Niko. He's so attractive without even trying. He's so sweet and humble as well. For someone as cool and amazing as him. I want to kiss him on the mouth.

Prepare yrself for a long paragraph.. (essay basically)

This bro. (The end is crazy babe but u ate regardless) I swear i’ve been trynna explain to my friends and they wont hmo😭. Like omg don’t get me started bae (oops u did..) like as u said he’s so sweet and humble, like wtv about the trolling you can tell he’s genuinely a nice person. Like he’s so generous and kind like omd. Nice guys 🔛🔝 fuck ‘bad boys’ the hell? He’s so funny as-well like from being unintentionally funny and his little sarcastic and side comments omfg. AND THE COMMENTARY MAN HELP ME😭. I BE ALMOST JOKING ON MY WATER FROM LAUGHING ISTG. Stop and his cuteness istg. Like he’s actually a cutie patootie. I was talking to one of my moots about it, she brought up his sleepy voice in the last to fall asleep vid and omfg. Part of me was like ‘🤭😻’ and the other part was ‘🥹💔’ LIKE. And the way he was hugging everyone when they came back omg :(. Stop AND (i think I’ve said and 42 times) his little downward smile I swr i’m the only one to bring this up omds, adorbs. His confidence is another thing that just.. fucking hell. (I think this is a problem..!!) yk how hot it is, genuinely? The way this man can go up to someone, say the most vile disgusting unhumane horrid cancellable thing on planet earth, and walk away like it never happened? 🛐🛐🫶🏻🫶🏻💍💍. Marriage. Omfd. Stop and he’s actually so smart as well like? Him those quiz vids.. omfg bro how does this man know that much? Like? Icl tho when he said ‘according to my calculations’ in that one vid.. I- 💀 niko babe no..!! Stop but yk when he puts his hands up and holds them while concentrating & has that one look on his face?! Yeah.. idk.. sm about that.. like.. 🫣😓🤔😶🤗🤭.. yous can say what u want about that but, me personally? ☺️👏🫶🏻🛐. No bcuz he’s genuinely so fine as well tho my friends are trippin. Like that man, omds. From his eyes to his smile to his HANDS (i had to mention them bro i’ve seen an edit..) like OMDJWKSJDJSWJJWJWJWJWJSJSKJWJSNWNWKWKEJEKWKEKWKW. I do not care that he walks like a 75yo with a walking stick. He’s fine. Bro him in a suit hits so diff bro omfds. Istg anytime I see him in a suit I nearly pass out. Unrelated but he likes the barbie movie. ☺️. Love him 4 that. Had to mention it bc surprisingly (not rlly) their aren’t a-lot of men who do.. (like its not based on what some of them do irl but okay!!) His eyes are actually so.. omfswiwosiw. Like yes stare at me like that bae!! 😻. Anyways I’m gonna stop now bc I feel like it’s getting out of hand guys.. *I will continue this in my notes*

BYE😭

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unpopularly-opinionated · 1 year

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I logged onto Twitter for literally 5 seconds and immediately saw people harassing a community director for something called the MAG Festival, which I gather is a video game convention of some variety, who made this joke banner for their event:

Game industry folks, of course, lost their minds and they had to backpedal (frustrating, but I get it).

Anyways, funny joke. Wish the games industry wasn’t so toxic and unwelcoming. Even if you genuinely believe GG was a toxic movement, it boggles the mind how anyone thinks harassing community managers for...*checks notes*...a dumb joke you can either choose to laugh at or roll your eyes and ignore, is better.

Unrelated side-note: Can we just talk about how fucked social media is in it’s current state? Like just the overall design of how interactivity between users works, and how all of them are explicitly designed to feed into this industry of hate and overall negativity?

Think about it: you see a joke on Twitter and, assuming you HAVE to respond to it one way or another as that’s what’s asked of you by nature of you using social media, you’re really only given two options:

Either you enjoyed the tweet, found it humorous, so you’ll indicate that enjoyment simply by clicking the little heart icon to increase the little number next to it that indicates how many other people enjoyed it, and then you’ll promptly move on.

Or, you disliked the tweet, perhaps it even upset you in some capacity, so you’ll indicate that displeasure by writing a 280-character (or h/e long Tweets are these days idfk) comment on how the joke “wasn’t funny” and perhaps even that the tweeter is “a bad person” for making it.

Now when the next person comes across that same tweet, which do you think they’ll see first, the single spot where it indicates that 10k people liked the post, or the seemingly-bottomless deluge of comments from 1k people expressing their negative response to the joke? More than likely their eyes will be drawn to the comments before the likes.

Now I know what you might be thinking: “Well, what’s to stop someone from commenting on the tweet to indicate that they liked the joke?” And you’re not wrong, except that the algorithm on most social media sites values the engagement from those negative comments higher than the engagement on those positive comment. Remember, even if every 100th person who liked the tweet posted a comment saying as much, the other 99 are still just scrolling by the post once they’ve liked it. They aren’t sticking around to like other positive comments. You know who are liking comments though? The ones already sticking around to comment their displeasure of the tweet.

So yeah, the TL;DR here is that social media, as are sadly most websites these days, are actively trying to not only piss you off, but to keep you essentially towing the line, so-to-speak. Don’t post anything too subversive or the algorithm will convince hundreds, if not thousands of people to harass you off the platform, if not worse.

#magfest #kotaku #video games #video game journalism #journalistic integrity #gamergate

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hannahwashington · 2 months

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ALSO IM JUST NOTICING YOUR HEADER IMAGE. I LOVE IT SO MUCH gundham danganronpa and crash bandicoot (is that his name im sorry) real. also btw feel free to talk abt th emountain experience bc i dont think i ever asked yet

YES HIS NAME IS CRASH BANDICOOT ive honestly BEEN waiting for someone to comment on my header it is one of my favourite images ever (thanks @horatios-mom). it's like a sequel to the era when i had lesbian crash bandicoot as my icon. i'm only through the prologue of sdr2 but i have been obsessed with gundham for Years,. i barely know the guy but i love him. i will Know More Soon. and trust i will be So mentally ill about him and also the series. i already Am i am just waiting to finish the games to post about them.

anyway MOUNTAIN EXPERIENCE. OH BOY. where to begin.

let me take you back to a time when a wide-eyed 17 year old Archie got traumatised by a mountain. sit back, relax, and follow along my recounting of an experience i found so horrible, i had to vent by projecting onto my favourite blorbos at the time. Don't worry, I am more than comfortable with sharing this story, and with hindsight know exactly where to direct my anger with what happened.

It's March 2020. I'm in my second-last year of high school. every year my school takes the people in this specific grade to a leadership camp to teach a variety of skills and stuff to prepare them for the next year, when they will be school leaders basically. this leadership camp happens to culminate in a hike up the Drakensberg, where we sleep overnight, then come back down and go back home.

To be Quite frank. I was Very Excited for this trip. the more school-related activities not so much, but getting the chance to hang out with my classmates outside of school and the hike were what excited me. I'm not the most fit person, but i loooove me a good nature walk.

So it's a few days before the hike. they take us out to a bunch of activities and it's pretty fun. we did an adventure park thing and i was in the middle of a massive tarzan fixation so when i went on a giant rope swing i did his iconic yell. there were ziplines. once when i went down a line i forgot to brake and SMACKED into the mattress on the tree. so that was fun. here's the thing though. they made us walk everywhere. and these weren't easy strolls, they were hikes in and of themselves. i can't speak for anyone else, but the days leading up to the hike were PAINFUL. my feet were so fucking sore and we hadn't even gone near the mountain yet.

Then they hit us with the "yeah we're pushing back the hike by a day because it's gonna be pissing buckets tomorrow." which, duh, of course it's gonna be pissing buckets, it's the drakensberg, it's kinda known for that. but also, that means another day of walking, another day of worsening the condition of my feet. i felt like sam from death stranding when you let him walk barefoot everywhere. it's around here where you might start recognising elements from the fic snippets i posted, by the way.

so the next day like the absolute ass he is, the headmaster (who joined us for. some reason) made us hike up a mini-mountain to 'prepare us' or something. he was a horrible person for completely unrelated reasons and this logic is totally and completely backwards. anyway, after THAT nightmare, we went tubing down a nearby river. this WAS fun. i went down the river multiple times even though my feet hurt like shit. i had to get my fleeting joy somewhere during this trip-turned-nightmare. everyone had fun except this one girl who was not lucky at all. at the end of the river there's a small drop and 99% of the time when you get there you fall out of your tube. she was one of these people, and was really unlucky as she ended up cutting her foot on a rock. she had to be pulled out of the river by a few of the boys.

now then you would THINK she would go home because of this. kind of a bad idea to hike up a mountain with a cut up foot. but no, like the madwoman she is, she decides to pull through. i respect her so much for it.

Anyway, next day comes, my feet are basically throbbing so bad it's like my heart practically lived in them, not even to mention the soreness in my legs. again - i was NOT fit. i was so nervous i could barely eat breakfast. i tried to twist it into something positive by being like "tehe i'm going up a mountain like my favourite teenaged blorbs" but it really was Not helping. sooooo we get to the foot of the mountain and get ready to go. a couple of girls left and missed the hike because they had a netball tournament or something. to this day i wonder if they realise Just how lucky they got.

This is the part i remember most vividly. the Worst part. we set off on our mountain adventure, and i repeat this mantra: keep pace with the person in front of you. which goes great for all of two minutes until like a whole five days of walking absolutely nonsensical distances catches up to me and i slow down and down and down until everyone has passed me and oops! i've stopped completely. my legs are Begging to be put out of their misery and i am Rooted To The Spot. to cut a long ass panic attack short eventually someone comes back to pick me back up and Get Me Up This Stupid Mountain. it wasn't sam unfortunately, it was the drama teacher, but he was a pretty cool person and probably most comforting adult there, so perfect to deal with me in that moment.

he tells me about setting little goals for myself, like finding a specific rock and making my way to it. break the whole hike down into thousands of little baby steps. this way, i actually started to make progress, little by little, until we break the tree line. i can't remember if this moment was in the snippets i posted, but i look up and see the rest of my classmates above me, and when they notice us they start whooping and cheering and singing break my stride (which is kinda the theme song of the trip, ngl). i was still kinda in hysterics so i yelled at them to shut up. looking back, i appreciate it so so much. anyways, the drama teacher and i carry on with our baby steps.

when i've calmed down enough i start talking. i can't remember if he told me to talk to get my mind off of things or if i started on my own, but in any case i just start talking. i know specifically i brought up treasure planet - my all time favourite movie - and he told me he hadn't heard of it. another fanfic snippet moment here: i did, in fact, rant to him about midsommar. i remember specifically talking about the daylight horror aspect and how the black bars could've been white instead to emphasise just how bright and sunny the film is. also at some point we passed random people on the road who didn't speak english and for some reason, to this day i still have no idea why, the drama teacher told me that he thinks those dudes were drug smugglers and using the trail to get drugs over the border. anyways.

eventually, after so, so long, we make it to the top. not the end of the hike, far from it, but the vertical climb is over. you see, this specific trail has like two hours of a horrible vertical climb, but after that, it's a basically-flat trail. not that that would make it any easier but anyway, i thought that the worst was over. from our position we could see the rest of the group, who were all resting by a fork in the path - a significant landmark. eventually we catch up to everyone, and if my fic is to be trusted, everyone started clapping and cheering and singing again, this time 500 miles (hardy har). this is one of the only details in the fic where i can't tell whether i made it up or if it's actually based on what happened. when i sat down, guess what, legs wanted to shrivel up and die, what else is new, but what really struck me was that Literally Everyone Was In The Same Position. some were crying. some were staring into space with cold, dead eyes. Nobody was having a good time. how foot-cut girl was even still here was what shocked me the most. again, CUT IN HER FOOT, it was PRETTY SUBSTANTIALLY SIZED. even so she did Not look good.

drama teacher had gone to talk to all the other adults about our (my and the injured girl's) predicament. we were in No position to carry on with the hike. (i'd argue nobody was but i digress). it was a full-blown argument from what i remember, and when the adults tried to talk to us they kept on interrupting each other. one kept trying to offer a way down, but another teacher (who championed this leadership camp btw, to put this into perspective) was Adamant we continue and simply sleep at the closer campsite.

You can probably guess what ended up happening.

The break just honestly made me feel Worse about moving, and my mentality obviously wasn't the best, and i sorta just really started missing home at this point, but i had to keep going. since it was flat this time i could actually keep some sort of pace, though head leadership camp teacher complained whenever i slowed down too much (actual villain of the story in hindsight). eventually we make it to one of the campsites.

Here's how the camps worked. every year the group split into two - boys and girls - and rotated each year on who went to each of the two campsites. one camp was by a river, the other by a cave. so, one year the boys would go to the cave and the girls to the river, and the next year they would switch. this year the girls were supposed to go to the cave. guess what. it's the further camspite - a good extra... i dunno, hour of walking? obviously injured girl and i couldnt do that. issue is, you need a tent to camp riverside - we obviously didnt have one. however someone, an actual god among men brought an extra tent with him. i never spoke to that kid. but he made it so we didn't have to suffer as much. so i hold a sort of affection for him.

so, the group splits and we finally, FINALLY get our chance to rest. properly. let me tell you, river water has never and i mean NEVER felt so good. i think i spent like a solid hour soaking my feet. the boys - who. somehow had energy after all THAT - made a dam out of rocks. one guy was taking pictures. i never took my own pictures of the mountain, even though the view was beautiful. i was in too much pain to care. i took a Single picture related to the hike itself, and i'll share that at the end of this thrilling tale. that evening after dinner, i snacked morosely and watched at least half of happy death day on my phone. maybe an episode of unbreakable kimmy schmidt, though i don't now for sure about that one. injured girl and i shared that extra tent.

oh yeah, and guess what. it ended up pissing buckets during the night. shocker.

anyway the next day comes and the walk back is worse. one of the other teachers decides to use 'tough love' on me - which was basically yelling at me and failing really badly at being encouraging. honestly would have preferred being tossed off the mountain instead because it just made me Very Distressed but anyway. what was nice was that this time for the walk injured girl and i were at the front of the line setting the pace. and also two of the boys, two absolute GENTLEMEN were walking with us and leading us. you know me, i'm a lesbian, but god i could've kissed them for what they did for us. (i did not but you get my point).

surprisingly the vertical climb down was the easiest part. the really, really vertical part anyway - which was mostly near the top. so easy that a few boys raced ahead of the group... and ended up taking a wrong turn and getting lost. more on them later. when we dipped into the treeline it felt like we were so close yet so far, SO close to ending this suffering, but every single turn without the tar road in sight made me fall deeper and deeper into despair. i think i literally yelled out "MERCY!" at some point. anyway when we did finally get to the road i started crying as we made our way back to the bus that would take us home.

everyone started taking showers, blessed, cold showers at the public bathrooms, and washing myself of the whole experience felt Wonderful. except it wasn't quite done insulting me just yet.

So. the day before we put our suitcases in the bus that would take us home. what they neglected to tell us was that we needed Everything we'd need for that day and the following day on our person. which means they wouldn't be taking our bags out of the bus, not even if we REALLY needed something. i didn't have my flip flops on me. i had put the shoes i had hiked in away (and also they were like sopping wet which is disgusting). it was hot as fuck and the parking lot outside was all gravel. i had to walk in that barefoot.

insult to injury.

i got myself ice cream. tried not to cry. we all had to wait for like half an hour as the lost boys made their way back to us (i can't remember if a teacher had to go back onto the path to find them or not). borrowed drama teacher's flip flops which were hilariously oversized. and then, literally RIGHT as everyone was boarding the bus to leave. i whip out my phone and grab the one and only picture i have related to the hike itself.

it was a long drive back to my home province. i put on some music, cuddled my pillow and tried to sleep. i mostly just tried not to sob. out of pain, relief, anguish - whatever. since it was a long drive, we stopped at a strip mall that's a really common sort of stopping station for people doing drives like this, such as to use the bathroom. another school happened to be pulled up as we stopped by here, and a girl gave me the filthiest, most judgmental look i have EVER seen because i was barefoot. i honestly don't blame her.

it was dark by the time we got back to the school. i did, in fact, cry when i saw my family. the very next day - no exaggeration, i'm 99% sure it was the VERY next day - it was announced that schools would be closing and the country would be going into lockdown due to covid. which means i got to spend the next, like, two weeks recovering instead of thinking about school. i think one of the days after i got back i watched interstellar. i was on a bit of a sci-fi kick. it was okay.

here's that picture i took outside the bus before we left for home.

people Did see me take this. a couple of my classmates made jokes about how they relate and at least one gave me a high five.

anyway, that's the story of my Mountain Experience™. again, more than comfortable sharing this story as i think it's quite important with understanding me and we know who to blame for putting us through this. i've had chats with other alumni who came before me and they had their Own nightmarish experiences with this camp, which makes me wonder how it continued being a thing for so long.

#ask #queerkearney #answered #my writing #biographical this time :)#kiddo's mountain experience #mutuals :)

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roxasboxas · 1 year

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22 for the violence ask game?

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

Ok this is a little hard to explain but I am constantly thinking about the relationship between Disney Town and the Land of Musketeers. I was really hoping someone would ask me this question specifically bc I want to talk about it.

Like-- Okay, we know that what happens in the Land of Musketeers during Dream Drop Distance is not how these events originally played out, since the sleeping worlds are just casually locked in dreaming time loops. King Mickey is there, fully aware of the wider universe and probably part of the way through his keyblade training. Donald, Goofy, Minnie, and Pete are there, too, which is very interesting with regards to in-canon lore. With the first three, one can say that this is simply their world of origin-- the world likely started dreaming shortly after this, although precisely when and how can't be pinpointed, so it makes sense that at least its queen and and two of her personal guards would follow the third back to his original home for safety.

But that Pete? From the Land of Musketeers? He is not our Pete.

We know where our Pete came from and what he got up to during that time. He came from Disney Town, and he goes from a bit of a sourpuss in the era represented by Timeless River to someone who acts out due to desiring recognition from his peers during BBS to an associate of Maleficent afterwards. A lot happens between these two points that we don't see-- In no particular order, Mickey gets married, he becomes a king, a castle is built (with grounds! and walls! and an attached town!), more people seem to appear and begin to developed a genuine and unified culture.

Nowhere in there is there room for whatever Musketeers!Pete is getting up to. And besides which, King Mickey doesn't seem to think he's worth commenting on anyways, when I'd think he'd have something to say if this Pete who'd gotten to be so important in another kingdom in another world was the same man he knew. And in BBS, Minnie only sees Pete as a nuisance, which is not the attitude I'd expect her to have if he'd previously kidnapped and attempted to kill her. They are two different Petes. (They might also be two different Minnies, and Donalds, and Goofys, but I can't prove that so I won't worry about it right now.)

And I know DDD wasn't in development with BBS, so they hadn't necessarily thought of its inclusion yet, but listen-- Nomura's not flying by the seat of his pants here, much as people joke about it, and he doesn't pick these worlds willy nilly. At the very least, if it was only one Pete, Mickey would've said something in DDD.

We've seen two different versions of the same character showing up before because of data and computers. But this? This is just straight up two Petes. Two real ass Petes, who have nothing to do with each other. And nobody feels the need to comment. This is just a thing that happens. Nomura's been sparing us the complications of having to deal with this with any real urgency, but as of DDD at the latest there's canonically two unrelated Petes and nobody talks about it.

The potential ramifications of this are, of course, immeasurable.

#kingdom hearts #dream drop distance #kingdom hearts dream drop distance #khddd #kh3d #im gonna need tags for disney characters huh #answered ask

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jovenshires · 5 months

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i was the tommy essay anon, and i just want to say how much it slapped?? the whole thing with spommy rivals-(to friends?)-to lovers is actually brilliant. bc i can see it so clearly.

it would make almost more sense for tommy and spencer to dislike each other first before they become bffs, right?? cause at first glance they really aren't alike at all. like you wouldn't expect them to be so fond of each other. (someone in the youtube comments once said 'they're like 2014 tumblr x 4chan and it somehow works' and it changed something in my brain)

i'm also remembering the truth or dab video where courtney was asked who in the room gives the worst first impressions, and spencer was soo surprised they didn't pick him. (courtney then said he gives the worst second impressions tho) <- sorry, a somewhat unrelated tangent.

but tommy's bag of insecurities and defensiveness + spencer's 'showing emotion is a weakness' thing makes for a pretty volitile combo. it's blowing my mind a little just how perfect it is, actually. and you said, let these guys be a little mean to each other? i love you

anyway, thanks for letting me geek out in your inbox, you're great, bye!

thank you!!!! AW see you get me. like ik they are besties-to-lovers most of the time but in another life the rivals-(to friends-ish.... you'll see but i think they would rather die than call each other friends even if it's true)-to-lovers potential is off the charts

YEAH like.... i maintain my stance that they are alike in more ways than they realize but on the surface they're SO different. (that.......... is so real holy shit only referring to them this way from here on out)

YEAH. YEAH REAL. there's no way he gives a Good first impression....... he needs some warming up to imo

ANYWAY. you get it exactly. like there's something about their dynamic that SHOULD be so explosive and in another setting, especially one where they're actively pitted against each other, it would be easy to make them... a little mean to each other.

i love YOU, you're great, thank you for chatting with me always <333333

#iwks #fic #ask #asks #anon #anonymous

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panthera-tigris-venenata · 9 months

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💡- What’s a idea you’ve enjoyed but never/couldn’t write?

🍤 - Who do you mostly write for (going “[someone] would enjoy this!” when writing)

💿 - Which character is most likely to have a terrible sleep schedule?

🔔 - What compliment meant the most to you regarding your writing? (offline or online)

🏳️ - Favorite way you have described something in your works

🔗 - What has been your favorite dynamic to write for? (romantic or platonic)

🥫 - What’s a scene you’ve really enjoyed working on?

💡 What's an idea you've enjoyed but never wrote//couldn't write?

Sea Three going on the Isle of the Doomed!

I mean. I did write it. Kinda. But there were more people and AU background and I'd like to write it again, thank you.

They'd go looking for CJ when she vanished, still, because it's a good motivation. However, I can't figure out a good trap for Gil, so I'm stuck.

Also Anthony doing Harriet's hair. I think it'd be neat.

💿 - Which character is most likely to have a terrible sleep schedule?

All three Hooks, Uma, probably Mal.

There is a bet going on about whether the Facilier sisters are sleeping at all.

Carlos while living in Hell Hall for reasons called "Cruella is crazy and time is fake."

Ben if someone didn't force him to stop working and/or studying at eleven in the evening at most.

Audrey sticks to her sleep schedule religiously to pretend she has everything under control and Fairy Godmother gives Jane lights out at ten o'clock sharp.

🔔 - What compliment meant the most to you regarding your writing? (offline or online)

Let me just:

And about every single comment @dragoneyes618 ever wrote me ✨

Unrelated to Descendants, someone once told me „I wouldn't be afraid to offer this to a publishing house.“ (We then met once and they said they loved my stories and it was the sweetest thing ever) (it was an original story, just to be clear.)

🏳️ - Favorite way you have described something in your works

...I don't think I'm describing stuff all that much?

I think this scene is neat, though, and I apologize for the length:

It only takes one visit to her room for her to get all she needs, her hands doing their tasks completely on autopilot. Unsteered.

Take the dagger, CJ, tuck it to your belt. Then the other one. And another. Don’t forget your sabres. The boxers, for when you feel like you want to punch something – you do want punch something, don’t you? Someone? Their bones cracking under your knuckles, their hot blood splattering all over you?

You do know that a few cracked faces won’t miraculously heal broken reality, don‘t you?

…Yes, that goes for skulls and spines too.

CJ’s own skull throbs violently, she wants to go to Harriet and make her tell her that everything will be okay, even if it’s a lie.

Somehow, explosives find a way to her bag.

Oh, who is she kidding? She knows full well how they got there, and she knows how she wants to use them, too. Her fingers just itch to zap the lighter and throw the gotten-on-black grenades with all her might.

Watch the world burn.

But not yet.

She knows who has to pay first. Who else should it be than the king that condemned her siblings to death for the mere crime of being born?

The atrocities afterwards do not count.

Old king or new king, CJ doesn‘t care anyway.

The old king and his family, the woman who set up the shimmering Barrier of CJ’s childhood prison and her siblings’s mausoleum, all the people who turned a blind eye to the Isle for the last two decades.

The entire royal council, yeah, sure, why not.

Go big or go home.

CJ laughs hysterically as she walks through the front gate of Auradon Prep, straight to the Castle Beast.

I'm also obsessed with this fic (claudine/huma) a normal amount.

Plus, for some reason, the mental image from this fic brings me so much joy: Ginny and Maddy sitting together on the floor, Ginny playing with her own hair while Maddy plays with her doll, raking her nails through its hair. They're so cute, your honour.

🔗 - What has been your favorite dynamic to write for? (romantic or platonic)

Harry Hook/Uma

Harriet & Harry & CJ

Harriet Hook/Anthony Tremaine/Ginny Gothel

Claudine Frollo & the pirate crews. Particularly Harry and Uma. No I will not shut up about them. It can be your problem.

✨ What's a scene you've really enjoyed working on?

Probably every single Hook siblings reunion scene. Which I wrote a normal amount of.

#disney descendants #ask

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mchiti · 11 months

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ohh how many white players have done and said questionable things and no one remembers. or they do remember and they cancel it out because they see his humanity. which is fine but at least afford non-white players the same humanity. lmao mudryk got more flak for filming a stranger at the gym than his pro-isr*eli and anti-arab comments and likes, that really tells you all you need to know.

i saw that comment you got about 'the arab world' and it made me laugh because the same person said 'you don't know anything about eastern europe' ... just imagine if we viewed eastern europe with as much ignorance and lack of nuance as they have when they view 'the arab world'? at least we can name more than 3 countries in eastern europe lol, don't know if they can say the same for 'the arab world'.

you're so right, unfortunately most discussions on football tumblr are done through a western lens. you simply cannot apply this lens when discussing footballers from the rest of the world but. the tragedy is that these people think they are so big-brained and liberal but in reality they are small-minded. like 'I truly don’t see how anyone who’s not Russian can just go to russia with a clean conscience' they need to ask themselves if they would feel the same way if r*ssia was at war with a middle eastern country rather than white ukraine? would they even care? if they would feel the same way if a footballer was seen visiting isr*el? or any other western country that has ravaged the ME and murdered and tortured its people? no, because when footballers are seen visiting those places, no one says anything.

anyway sorry and i love you and thank you for talking to me about this ❤️

It's just so disappointing isn't it anon. Like we can't even fathom saying this out loud because that's not something you can even put into words without people laughing at you for being ridiculous, but how is usa any different from russia in that sense. How is israel different. I saw the pics of another little Palestinian kid murdered in the streets, a 2 year old kid, only yesterday. It drives me mad if I think nobody - nobody - on here went to discuss mudryk clean conscience for supporting an apartheid state. Or him replying "FACTS" to someone saying 'why would he support your arabian shit?" like how? where is his clean conscience there. Where is everyone's conscience. If we wanna be real than let's admit players are just players, a lot of them are not necessarily educated on stuff but if you accept that you have to grant this privilege to anyone. Because if one moroccan player visiting russia for reasons that are not even political in the first place makes you writing posts about it (i've seen that on his tag) then do it for everyone else. or is that the only conflict worth mentioning cause as you said it's against a white, christian country. if you use that measure anyone who plays in MLS has no clean conscience then lmao. or are the half million and counting of iraqis murdered not worth mentioning, just to say one of the million examples of occupations, bombings on civilians, murders and torture from the west.

it's an unjust world we live in. but precisely because it is unjust, targeting a single player for political reasons that are completely unrelated to him, questioning his level of conscience while the whole western world never question their own level of conscience is unfair and it will never, ever sit right with me. That he probably underestimated the implications I said it myself, but this is another level of hypocrisy.

oh no don't apologise!! i mean this is exactly the stuff that you type it down and you can get canceled forever but yeah. I think of mudryk "arabian shit - facts" comments before I sleep and I get motivated into not falling for this shit ever. I think of my baba then, my mama, all the migrants and diaspora kids I know. I think of all the "arabian shit" that are part of my life. And I will never sit down or stay quiet. Have a great day/night ❤️

#asks

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allylikethecat · 11 days

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Totally unrelated to most of the stuff you post but on the topic of your Taylor explanation just and your comment about not rlly buying the variants anymore-

I’m a fan of her music for sure but the way they sell variants just really gets me. I mean there is absolutely NO NEED. The way they release the original on presale first so everyone gets it and then they release each variant individually with a different song on it saying it’s “exclusive” and “only going to be available for 70 hours” or something like that, only for them to be repeatedly restocked and then eventually made widely available in indie record stores. Like it’s just straight up lying for money??? That they don’t need. And THEN releasing the same vinyl records with signed inserts so that people buy the SAME record. Again. It’s so incredibly tone deaf and exploitative idk Ik it’s a choice to variant collect but it’s just milking people for no reason. And I know so many other labels do it but none do it NEARLY as bad as it is done for Taylor swift. And Ik it’s not like it’s under her control or whatever but she has so much money and influence that she ABSOLUTELY could do something about it if she wanted to or cared in the slightest ygwim?? I am a vinyl collector but I honestly find it hard to even bring myself to get one version of her albums bc of this. And like considering a lot of her audience is so young as well idk it rlly rubs me up the wrong way. And each one gets posted on the Instagram with love hearts and a cute picture and it’s just like 🥳🩷🤩buy this too!😂😇💕. Idk Ik so many artists do it but like influence wise she’s not really at the mercy of her label ig?? At least not to the extent that she couldn’t make moves to combat it if she wanted?? Anyways that rlly put me off ig (I’m still a fan though can’t help myself). Also Ik this is soo unrelated to your account and you ABSOLUTELY don’t have to respond to this if you don’t want to. I just saw that other post and it made me think about it.

Alsoooo any clues on the fic being posted tomorrow 🫢?? 🥹🥹 I ask like I have a favourite but I will very much be excited at ANY update I won’t lie

AND I’m dying at the fact we are HALF WAY through all the kings horses??!? Idk if I can handle not having a new chapter each Friday. But also excited for fictional Matty and George to get together and possibly be happy even (crazy thought Ik)??

Oh my gosh thank you for sending me this super long ask! This is another one I debated answering because I don't want to start any kind of fights or cause any kind of issues or drama. Also, as always I do want to say that these opinions are my OWN and are based on how I feel and I am not saying that I am *right* or that someone else is *wrong*. I'm not trying to convince anyone of anything, just tossing in my two cents / my perspective.

Even though I'm not a *huge* fan of Taylor anymore, and have felt like I have outgrown Taylor Swift the Brand, I do still enjoy her music (for the most part) but I 100% get the million variations thing from a marketing / sales prospective? Like it sucks but that's business and if people are going to keep buying them they're going to keep making them. As a businesswoman these days I would expect nothing less. Let get that money!

HOWEVER, I know Billie Eilish got a lot of flack for her comments about vinyl variations and then also having a billion of them for her new album, and while I'm not really a fan of her music (I think she's talented she's just not really my vibe) I did think it was cool that regardless of how her comments were misinterpreted she put all her variations on sale at the same time and the track listings were all the same, therefore giving fans the opportunity to just choose and purchase their favorite colors instead of scrambling because something is "limited edition" but not really. Maybe not as good for the seller since the panicked demand isn't there, but that does make for a more pleasant experience as the buyer. Also yay bundled shipping!

Even though it was probably a let down, I hope you enjoyed the sick fic I posted today - I don't think anyone guessed that would be the fic updated so maybe I can still be surprising haha

Hehe I'm so happy that you're enjoying All the King's Horses! That is currently my favorite fic and I am so absolutely obsessed with it and having so much fun working on it! I love horses and the boys SO MUCH and I am so excited to continue sharing their story 🩵 We're roughly halfway through- a few chapters might get added because I don't know if I'll be ready to leave the yet when the time comes haha I'm very excited Fictional!George is going to take Fictional!Matty on a date soon, it's going to be very sweet and very them.

Thank you so much for sending me this ask and for reading and your continued support! I hope I answered it in a satisfactory way that doesn't ruffle anyones feathers too badly! I want to keep my blog a happy positive space when possible! (Heartbreak fanfic not included in that happy statement haha) I hope your Tuesday is going well and that you have a great week!

❤️Ally

#allylikethecat #ask ally #anon ask #keep it kind #fanfiction #matty fic #gatty #fanfic #questions #all the king's horses #equestrian au #in sickness and in health #sickfic #i hope its okay if we move away from some of the taylor topics #i know i was the one that initially brought it up #but some of the complex feelings surrounding it are kinda bumming me out #like i wanna be carefree and eighteen again #not twenty eight and like... having to adult lol #lets talk about noah kahan lol

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amaounghususssy · 14 days

Text

I think I just became a pariah on an mspfa fandom

There's this mspfa called deadlock that is like really fucking amazing and I read the whole thing in one sitting and t was like 700 pages and I couldn't stop thinking about it. Anyways 2 days later after my second readthrough I get to the end and go to the new pages that were added after I finished it the first time and keep in mind this thing has been updating for 8 months before I found it. On the page, the creator said they were unhappy with where it was going and was rebooting the whole thing from the start and unlisting the old one. If you haven't experienced content grief let me tell you it is horrible especially when the obsession is fresh. I kind of freaked the fuck out I admit and even though I knew the new one was probably going to turn out to be better, I was still planted firmly in the anger stage of grief at the time and commented something along the lines of "(character): do nothing. Nothing matters since that comic you like got rebooted" and then kind of immediately left and forgot about that comment. I'm sorry I swear I was in a bad place and it was the middle of the night. The next day I checked my notifications and saw that someone tagged me saying more or less "SHUT UP (USERNAME) NOBODY CARES" and it ratioed the hell out of me. Fight or flight kicks in and I delete my comment but the angry one still has my username in it to call me out with and I kind of felt like actual garbage for a while. There was another comment from the creator and I don't know if it was in response to mine but it pretty much said (regarding the decision to reboot) "I write for myself not other people" and i'm a visual thinker as soon as I see the comment I made, the angry one, and that one in conjunction my mind conjures a picture of an angry criminal or something (me) being hauled away by the cops and screaming "I'LL GET YOU BACK FOR THIS" at a tearful child (the creator) while the creator's parent (angry commenter) says "never go near my child again or you're dead, you hear me?" And I couldn't get that image out of my head for a while. Sucked. Anyways after deleting the comment I don't know why but I still felt like idk expressing this somewhere. I went into an unrelated fanventure's comments and AFTER THINKING IT OVER SO I DON'T SAY ANYTHING TOO REGRETFUL HOPEFULLY I just write "I can't believe (creator) rebooted deadlock". I know it sounds like I'm being dramatic going to these lengths and I probably was but you haven't read this thing man. Nobody reacts to the comment so mission accomplished I guess.

A couple days pass to today, and I've recovered to an extent. Not sure how much of an extent but the change was noticeable I guess. Basically I go on the deadlock discord and it has this channel where people can plug their own random mspfas for whatever reason. I decide why the hell not and do that. This is where the real unbelievable shit happens. As soon as I post the link and a quick message about having posted it there, someone types the exact comment. That I wrote on the other fanventure. It was like "page 349, 9 Apr 2024, (username), I can't believe (creator) rebooted deadlock". This was SECONDS after I make a message in the discord. You can't make this shit up. I said "What" and the other person never responded. Nobody else was on that channel. I know it wasn't a bot because they had a normal bio and servers and they plugged their own fanventure a ways upward in the channel. My discord username and mspfa username are completely different and there wasn't enough time by far between when I posted it and when they said that for them to click on it, click on my profile, click on my favorite fanventures, happen to select the correct one, and look at the comments, like it's an astronomically low chance. It was sburb.exe so I guess it wasn't the most obscure one it could've been so it's not out of the question that they saw it before, but like, how did they have it ready to copypaste? How did they know my discord and my mspfa are run by the same guy? The discord username is related to sburb.exe I guess and it's on the deadlock discord so maybe how many people are fans of both? But even if they did that yagami light ass deductive move how did they have it ready to copypaste and what's the fucking chance they were the only other person in that server at that time?

I waited until they got offline and deleted the "What" message so hopefully more people don't pull an fbi on me again because that message (correctly) implies I am the one that said that. Creator I'm sorry for badmouthing the deadlock reboot please don't kill me

#homestuck #mspfa #deadlock #is this it is this forum drama #discord #freaky #apology post #kinda #im not like this in real life i swear #content grief #i felt like trash now i feel like im being watched

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verdantglow · 1 month

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that makes so much sense actually. i also am making some aus (unrelated) and am wanting to seperate them into little ficlets/art pieces/comics of the pieces that motivate me before even touching on an overarching story but also god is it difficult for me. if thats what works for you as well id definitely say treat it like that (also i would LOVE to see any animatics you do for this)

i personally am mostly watching the hermits doing their hermit crafting (currently watching 18 hermits simultaneously the hyperfixation is b a d) and a couple SOS members, though i plan to watch more of the creators. I've really only seen up to double life (all through grians pov), and i havent even finished that. in my defence, the "its for your secret soulmate" line utterly and completely destroyed me and i have NOT recovered since (i stopped watching his hermitcraft videos after that too until the start of s10).

i have made the resolution to go watch other povs but i need to finish his first rip.

ANYWAY BACK TO THE AU

How often do you think the vflarp games effect their out of game relationships? like obviously it led to them becoming friends and desert duo becoming "moirails" but like. Did double life cause a rift between grian and scar? has rendog being absent from the games had any significance on anything? (i havent watched further so i cant really give too many other examples). Do the winners get anything other than the satisfaction that they alone won?

absolute behemoth of an ask my bad

Yeah! There’s just something so appealing about being able to just jump around & do mini projects that go together rather than one huge one. I’m hoping it’ll hold off the burn out I inevitably get for my AUs. **stares off into the distance thinking about all my mega fics that only ever got three chapters** I get it being hard to break it down though! I hope you’re able to land at a place where you can create as easily & painlessly as possible. ^^

I feel you on the hyperfixation lol. I was doing that hermitblr survey that’s going around & realized that I watch every episode of a third of the server, & some to most episodes of another third. & there’s a handful in the final third that I’ve been meaning to watch, but haven’t gotten to because I’m so busy watching everyone else & thinking about fanworks. This season is just slamming all the good brain chemical buttons!

Tbf, “it’s for your secret soulmate” hit so fucking hard, I do not blame you an ounce for wanting to take a break after that! When you’re ready, I highly recommend Martyn’s 3rd life, it’s so good! I never quite got the Renchanting/Treebark hubbub as someone who’d only seen Grian’s perspective of that season, but after watching Martyn’s… The drama is just. So. Good. Martyn + Ren is just a combo of theatre kid lore nerds & it honestly slaps. Gem’s Secret Life is damn good as well, just ‘cause she got to be a chaos gremlin & we love to see it.

Oh yes, their VLARPing affects IRL relationships all the time! A lot of early relationships developed due to playing 3rd Life & those relationships continued on to influence who went on which ship once they reached adulthood! Obviously, we’ve got Scar & Griann, but also there’s Scohtt & Jimmie who became auspitices, & Wrehnn & Martyn who stick together & eventually become matesprits. Jimmie & Tangoh hit it off after playing Double Life as soulmates & eventually enter a [matespritship? Moiraillegance? Haven’t decided] as well. & of course, my beloved Boat Boys developed their weird whatevership around the same time. (Joel swears they’re pitch. Eethos never comments on it. The truth is somewhere around them being hate friends who are flushed for each other??? But fuck if you’ll ever get either of them to admit it.)

Things were pretty rocky for Scar & Griann after DL; the whole secret soulmate thing was a case of Griann being mildly annoyed with Scar & thinking he could get back at Scar/make Scar jealous. This blew up in his face ~*~spectacularly~*~ & it took quite a bit for things to heal between them. (Mummbo spent a lot of that time being very confused why the vibes on Scar’s ship were so fucking rancid until he managed to get Griann to fess up.)

There definitely is a plot related reason Wrehnn hasn’t been playing, but I’m holding back on finalizing anything until I get more of the out of game plot mapped out. But yes, that definitely affects/is an effect of things in game!

I think, much like in real life, winning is just for the prestige of it. Like, in this AU, the Life series is just a bunch of games they’re playing for the heck of it. Though this does make me think that I need to decide where these games come from, whether it’s a mass market thing or something Griann threw together or if maybe it came from some other outside influence. Hm…

#trafficstuck #verdant answers #verdant rambles #trafficblr #also I have to say your asks as absolutely delightful & I always look forward to them!#like seriously. bright points of my days.#thank you for sending them!#^^

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maoam · 3 years

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WHY HINATA IS NOT A GOOD CHARACTER

INTRODUCTION

I wanted to take a deeper look at Hinata’s character, considering there are a lot of claims about her out there, that she’s strong, that she’s kind, that she’s complex and relatable, that she’s the perfect woman and that she’s at least better than Sakura. I don’t really think so, and I’ll explain why. I’ll be focusing on canon, so no fillers or novels will be included in this post. I’ll say this as a warning, if you’re a fan of her character this probably won’t be something you’ll like. This will be tagged with the anti tags and put under read more so please do not complain if tumblr somehow puts this in the normal tags, it is not intentional. Also Sakura stans please don’t write lengthy comments about Sakura under this, I’m not a fan of her either and I’ll write about her later. Make your own post instead.

”HINATA IS STRONG AND THE BEST KUNOICHI”

Hinata is generally really bad as a shinobi and I’m not sure where the claims that she is strong come from. Hinata's entire character revolves around her being weak. This could have been fine if she actually developed, or if she found some other area for herself, yet she's mediocre at best and a waste of panels at worst, because she never becomes good or strong at anything. She’s not only physically weak from start to finish, but she’s also the equivalent of a damsel in distress. Everytime Hinata attempts to do something, she ends up failing, getting beaten up and having to be saved. She lost to her sister who is five years younger than her, which is what marked her as a failure in her clan. She tried to fight Neji in the chunin exams and ended up coughing up blood and losing her consciousness, and Naruto had to beat Neji for her. After Kabuto heals her fully, she spends the rest of part 1 either sleeping or missing in action. Very underwhelming.

If this had been only the beginning, it would have maybe been fine, but it’s a reoccuring pattern with her character. She throws herself in front of Pain, managing to do nothing but get one-paneled and almost killed. Even at the start of the war she had to be saved by Naruto. She tried to run to Naruto and tripped over a rock. Actually, she’s so weak she got Neji killed, when he had to jump in front of her so she wouldn’t get impaled. Why is she even in the front lines when she can’t fight? Even in Naruto the Last movie she had to be saved multiple times. In Boruto the movie she is still useless and reckless, leaving her daughter’s side to help Naruto, ending up defeated and having to be healed by Sakura once again.

I can’t say she’s mentally strong either. She has the personality of someone who hates conflict and tries to avoid it as best as they can, to the point of agreeing with others on everything, as Neji pointed out. Even without him saying it out loud, most of Hinata’s moments that aren’t her thinking about Naruto are her doing exactly this. This is not the personality of someone who is strong mentally. It’s the personality of someone who is too weak to have their own mind, someone who will go with the flow and is easily led and convinced. It can be dangerous the more you think about it. Hinata is also the bystander who never stands up for Naruto despite liking and admiring him. If she’s a compassionate girl, why isn’t she showing this by reaching out to Naruto and befriending him? Why doesn’t she show he’s not alone? Why is she only drawing inspiration from him? I don’t normally watch fillers, but there was one filler scene unrelated to Hinata where this girl says if you only look at the loser and do nothing, you aren’t much better than the oppressors, which probably wasn’t meant to be a call out for Hinata, but ended up being so anyway. Another thing that’s annoying is how she is berating herself often, yet doing nothing, it comes off as self-pity. Even in the Last movie, she is talking about how she must be a bad sister for knitting a scarf when her sister is in danger. Then why are you doing it and not stopping? Of course everytime this happens Naruto must cheer her up because she just can’t stop moping around and doing something herself.

Aside from all this, from the very beginning Hinata’s honor needed to be defended by Naruto because she couldn’t stand up for herself. Of course, after Naruto’s words she did stood up for a moment, and that was good, but it should have been a wake up call which altered her course. Instead, she kept doing the same she always did. If we take the Last movie into consideration, she’s still not strong enough to do anything even about her crush on Naruto. She needs genjutsu and Sakura to do the work for her. So even when it comes to the only thing she cares about 90 % of the time, which is Naruto-kun, she can’t do anything about it. That’s really sad.

”HINATA IS KIND AND SELFLESS”

There’s one mistake I see people make often, and that’s assuming characters that are quiet and shy are automatically kind. I wouldn’t say Hinata is as kind as the fandom makes her out to be. She simply comes off that way because you don’t really see her have her own opinions or disagree with the other characters. Hinata’s shyness on the other hand is most of the time a fetishized quirk to appeal to certain subset of fans. Her shyness doesn’t stop her from taking exams or hanging around Shino and Kiba, or talking to characters other than Naruto. She also has enough attitude to rub Neji’s status as a house slave in his face during their match, but because she stutters Naruto-kun every five minutes she’s supposedly kind. Kindness is shown through actions, not through standing around and stuttering. For comparison, we see Ino befriend an unpopular kid like Sakura, and give her confidence. That’s an act of kindness. Did Hinata ever cared about helping the branch members in any way? No.

She's supposedly "kind" but like I mentioned before she never shows this kindness by standing up for Naruto, or reaching out to him. She simply stares at him behind a tree and draws inspiration from his suffering. The only time she can actually stand up is to selfishly confess her love and die. She even said she felt like being selfish, and like I said she knew there was nothing she could do, she was told she’d only be in the way. She came there only to confess and commit suicide. This actually reminds me of another anime where this female character, after being unable to receive a male character’s love killed herself in front of him and said ”now you’ll never forget me”.

In the end, she cares about nothing but her own hormonal urges. Hinata tried to help Naruto cheat to pass an exam at the risk of disqualifying her whole team. This is the first individual action we see her character take. Did she consider Shino and Kiba during that moment? No, she didn’t even have an inner conflict on whether she should do this, whether it’s right towards her teammates. Even Naruto considers he might get Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura all in trouble if he accepts Hinata’s offer, which is why he doesn’t do it. Then when Hinata wonders if she can cheer for Naruto during his and Kiba’s match, she thinks Kiba might get mad. It’s more about how Kiba views her rather than whether she should cheer for Kiba because they are in the same team and should support each other. During the Pain attack, she left an injured shinobi, who couldn’t move, to go to Naruto, even when said shinobi told her she would only be in Naruto’s way. She didn’t try to save people, she simply wanted to confess and act in front of Naruto. This is about a threat to the entire village, which includes her comrades and her sister and she’s thinking only about her romantic feelings towards a guy she had maybe two conversations with and who barely remembers she exists. How is she better than Sakura? War arc really was the icing on the cake that Hinata’s character is only about Naruto. We should not forget the infamous ”Naruto-kun’s hand is so big… so manly...” is that really the right time to be thirsty? When Neji just died? Shikamaru mentions that he could help out Naruto as a right-hand man and then Hinata thinks “I-I want to be by Naruto-kun’s side too.” Then there’s of course the scene where she starts running to Naruto, leaving her post and teammates, even when Naruto is a mile away and already in the hands of medical ninjas, and even that ends up her pathetically tripping over a rock. Kiba has to remind her to use her byakugan because she is too busy gushing about Naruto. Eventually her only last line is “Naruto-kun”, when everyone is put into IT. It’s like a parody by this point. She doesn’t have any concern for her sister, her father, her teammates, Kurenai or her baby. It’s just “Naruto-kun” like it always is. Even in the Last movie, she is knitting a scarf for Naruto during the mission where they’re supposed to save her sister. Who brings a scarf on a mission? Why is she thinking about her romantic gift to Naruto so much she has to take it with her on a mission which focus is saving her sister? She even looks more devastated when Toneri tores the scarf apart than she ever does for Hanabi’s sake. It’s just silly and selfish.

”HINATA IS A COMPLEX CHARACTER”

Is she complex though? Her development goes from standing behind a tree looking at her crush she never talks to, to committing suicide for feelings that could never be reciprocated, to… waiting that a genjutsu and Sakura guilt trip Naruto enough for him to be with her? Like I already mentioned her character revolves entirely around Naruto, she has no hobbies or interests we know of aside from him. She has no motivations aside from being by Naruto’s side. She once had an interesting goal and backstory, but that was never fully explored, and it turned into her wanting Naruto’s attention and thinking about him. Her clan plot was irrelevant, she showed no interest in wanting to be a leader or even wanting to make things better for the branch members. It’s funny because immediately after the ending, no one cared about the Hyuuga branch and how the storyline was dropped and had no resolution. It was only when Hinata was being attacked for not showing to care did her fans start to over-analyze all the panels looking for the tiniest little clue that might hint at some changes.

It’s possible to be both shy, anxious and quiet and also to be strong, motivated and have interests and dreams. Hinata is never strong for herself, she’s only strong to be with Naruto, to die for Naruto, to motivate Naruto, to have Naruto look at her even for a moment. All the while Naruto doesn’t pay much attention to her unless she’s literally dying in front of him or she slapped him. Even when a big climax is happening, what’s on her mind is always her romantic feelings and her crush. I saw someone say if she were a male character, and she pulled this pointless sacrifice and theatrical confession in the final fight of an arc, she would’ve been universally mocked. Actually, I think even if it was Sakura who did this instead of Hinata the former would have been mocked, because their stans are unable to see the same flaws in their own fave as they see in the other girl. Naruto is a battle manga, characters are supposed to contribute to the defeat of the villain in some material way. The only reason people praise Hinata for what she did in the Pain arc is because they either pity her or because they’re men who think women killing themselves for a man is great because it boosts their ego.

I also notice many Hinata fans don’t notice the vanity in their own fandom. They call Hinata “princess”, ”heiress”, ”Konoha’s first lady” and draw fanart glorifying these concepts and how it makes Hinata good, because they like the superficial status, what they don’t care is the titles are unearned. I thought Hinata’s appeal was that she’s the underdog and a loser? Or maybe her real appeal is the idea of getting everything you want without doing much in order to get it? Another claim is that Hinata is the perfect woman, which you might see from men. This is what I might dislike the most. Men judge Hinata’s worth and whether she’s a good character based on what kind of woman they want and think is the right kind of woman. Hinata has big breasts, she’s submissive, she has no other interests than the man she likes, and she’s the only girl in her class who didn’t go for the popular guy. Many men hate Sakura, Ino and Karin for being fangirls but praise Hinata for being a fangirl. Basically to them if a character is a fangirl of the wrong guy, she’s a stupid slut. If she fangirls their self insert, she’s wife material and the ideal woman. If Sakura has to be saved, she’s useless. If Hinata tries to kill herself for Naruto, she’s ”so kind”. Rin is a one-dimensional character, but Hinata saying Naruto-kun for the 50th time is depth. Hinata is also claimed to be better than the other girls because she had more kids and thus is more ”fertile”. It’s like feminism never happened and we are back to the 16th century. Why are we judging women’s worth on how many kids they have and how much they can please a man?

I could also talk about how Studio Pierrot turned Hinata into a hentai bait for otakus, which also plays a part in her popularity, but I don’t think it’s necessary, so I will just offer this picture which speaks for itself.

END NOTE

Hinata is simply just a sexist stereotype, a shadow of a real woman, with not much depth, and who is certainly not better than Sakura either. Both of them are fangirls whose characters revolve around men. It’s wild to me how there are women who genuinely act like one must be a misogynist if they reject Hinata’s superficial, one-dimensional and boy crazy character. Her character itself is misogynist for crying out loud. And honestly, what does it say when even the creator himself assumes that Hinata is someone’s favorite character because he must like big boobs?

#anti hinata #anti hinata hyuga #mp #I'm not sure if I'm satisfied with this #but there's just not much to talk about when it comes to her character #it would just become repetitive

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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA Chapter 320: Deku vs. Class 1-A

Previously on BnHA: Flashback!Kacchan was all “fuck Deku and fuck his stupid goodbye letters, I need to speak to somebody in charge.” Endeavor was all “hello, I am Somebody In Charge.” Kacchan was all “listen up asshole, you need to let us go out and collect our wayward nerd because you stupidly left him alone with All Might and that’s a fast track to disaster right there.” Endeavor was all, “[self-incriminating silence].” Rat Principal was all, “okay sure, have fun kids.” Back in the present, class 1-A was all “hi Deku” and Deku was all “I’M FINE!!!!!” and Kacchan was all “THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU’D SAY YOU DUMB FUCKING NERD” and so the kids all got ready to fight, because OF COURSE they’re gonna fight. Sorry guys, but yeah it’s happening.

Today on BnHA: Kacchan is all “what’s up Deku you look like a possessed Rorschach test, so anyway how are the new quirks coming along.” Deku is all “they’re coming along like THIS” and uses Smokescreen to try and get away. Kacchan is all “PHASE ONE COMMENCE”, and Kouda, Sero, Jirou, and Ojiro leap into the fray to shower Deku with heaps of love and violence, because this is a shounen manga and kicking someone’s ass while simultaneously proclaiming your undying admiration for them is just how it’s done in these parts. The KoudaSeroOJirou squad then passes the baton to Satou, Momo, Tokoyami, Kaminari, and Shouji, who are all “fuck this mask” and do a bunch of stuff to tear Deku’s mask off because they’re the real heroes. Shouto is all “LOOK AT THE LITTLE CRYBABY, THAT’S RIGHT, GO AHEAD AND FUCKING CRY and by the way let us share your burden please,” and once again I swear this is all very deeply moving and touching within the actual context. The chapter ends with Tsuyu being all “look at me. I’m the cliffhanger now,” and damn.

lol what

I don’t think anyone was expecting that. I mean, not that I’ve got anything against Tsuyu or anything. anyways it’s a very nice cover and I love the colors and I hope this means Tsuyu’s gonna do something badass

also, “Deku vs Class A” -- pretty much the expected title, but it’s still got me hyped nonetheless fuck yeah let’s go

IIDA ANGST

Iida Tenya really said “fuck the uniform code, we’re leaving the helmet at home today.” sorry kids, prim and proper C-3PO Comic Relief Iida has left the building. can I interest you in some Serious Iida

meanwhile Kacchan is all “sup Deku, I heard you got a few more quirks, and might I just add that you look like the Snyder Cut of Detective Pikachu”

“you look like a tarred and feathered squid” okay easy there Kacchan. I mean it’s all true of course, but still

“thank you all for coming” OH EXCUSE ME SON, WERE YOU PLANNING ON GOING SOMEWHERE. LET’S JUST SEE HOW THAT PLAYS OUT

yep and there’s Smokescreen, right on cue

okay Horikoshi, I leave it in your hands. hopefully you can come up with some more interesting combos than my dumbass predictions lol

LOL THIS ISN’T A COMBO AT ALL

“explosions solve everything” -- Horikoshi Kouhei, 2021. something something shockwave, something something handwave ta-da no more smoke. lol okay then

oh, ouch

he would know, wouldn’t he. nice application of one of your many hard-earned life lessons, Kacchan

by the way you guys, just as an experiment, I’m going to try to anticipate some of the discourse this week in the hopes of preemptively addressing it and thus saving myself some time later on lol. so here’s our first test run!

ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “oh my god what a fucking hypocrite can you believe this fucking guy”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: it’s precisely because Kacchan has been in this exact situation himself that he’s able to recognize his past self in Deku now and call him out on it. just because it took him sixteen years to get it through his head that he can’t accomplish every single thing completely by himself doesn’t mean Deku has to go down that same path. so yeah, maybe it is a bit hypocritical, but if you insist that the only people qualified to call out stupid shit are people who have never done a single stupid thing in their own lives, then what you’re basically saying is that absolutely no one on earth is qualified lol. so yeah, I’d have to disagree

and one last unrelated note, I’m willing to bet the whole “you didn’t even say a word before you ran off” thing is possibly the first thing Kacchan’s said in this whole encounter that actually does stem from genuine hurt rather than his tough-love-harsh-truths strategy. I’M TAKING NOTES HERE HORIKOSHI. at this rate it’ll take twice as many chapters as DvK2 for them to hash out all the stuff between them, geez

anyway so I gotta say, so far Deku vs. Class A is looking an awful lot like a DvK3 wearing a hat, trenchcoat, and sunglasses lol

OH SHIT I TAKE IT BACK??

FUCK YEAH, YOU GO KOUDA. and I guess he ditched his mask as well! excellent

so far the strategy here seems to be “Kacchan says all the mean tough love shit while the rest of 1-A balances it out with warmth and kindness”, which actually works pretty well imo. Deku is one of those people that doesn’t usually need a Kacchan Translator anyway, but just in case, this is very efficient

mm but of course Deku is slingshotting himself away with Blackwhip. all right then, who’s up next!

FUCK YEAH

okay but seriously you guys, what is going on with Sero’s face in these last couple of chapters though, it’s really starting to unnerve me. is he trying to emulate Kacchan’s whole asymmetrical facial expressions thing?

in fact let me just quickly hit pause here because,

ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “SERO IS TOGA??!”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: no

oh snap looks like Jirou’s getting in on the action too!

poor Jirou probably spent days racking her brain trying to think of something she could bond with Deku over. is Horikoshi doing these in reverse order of the kids who have had the most interaction with him? that would explain why poor Kouda didn’t get a flashback lol

omg. well that answers that

so by my count, Satou and Hagakure are the only ones remaining in this first tier of kids who Still Appreciate Midoriya even though they’ve barely ever spoken two words to him in their lives lol. so they’ll probably be next, and then we’ll get to the next tier of kids who are pretty good friends with him but not quite besties. and then we’ll move on to the IidaRokiRaka trio, and then lastly, to the boy who is in a tier all his own

BUT FIRST, A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR

and by “sponsor” I mean the Dekuangst. just in case that wasn’t clear. indeed, many thanks to the Dekuangst for making this all possible

(ETA: okay so this whole “take me away” line seemed pretty weird to me, and sure enough it’s yet another one of those cases where only the verb is specified, and the object is left to the reader’s interpretation. so even though the translation says “take me away”, I’m pretty sure that what Deku’s actually saying is “take you away” -- as in, his loved ones will be taken away by AFO.

and that is literally the way he phrases it, though -- the verb used is “奪う” (ubau), meaning “to snatch away; to dispossess; to steal.” which, god, that hurts my whole goddamn heart though, because for him to say it like that?? not “AFO will kill you”, but “AFO will take you away from me.” he can’t have nice things anymore because of AFO. he can’t be around the people he loves because AFO will hurt them. he can’t have happiness because AFO will take it away from him. anyway so where the fuck is AFO right now, motherfucker I just want to talk.)

by the way can Ojiro just extend his tail to whatever fucking length he wants or what because it’s like twelve feet long in this panel lol

WOOO FUCK YEAH TOKOYAMI

YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!! BUT WHERE’S YOUR FLASHBACK? YOU’VE HAD A BUNCH OF INTERACTIONS WITH HIM, THAT’S NOT FAIR

okay so now Satou’s stepping in which is back to my anticipated order, so maybe Toko will finish his little moment afterward

dskfjfkk

“REMEMBER THAT TIME DEKU BORROWED SATOU’S FOOD COLORING” Horikoshi says, sweating. “AND REMEMBER THAT TIME HE, UM, SMILED IN HAGAKURE’S GENERAL DIRECTION”

actually I am curious about what Hagakure’s part will be because, you know, the whole traitor thing lol

(ETA: funny how we just skipped right over it huh. can we get a traitor reveal countdown started here? definitely getting close to that time.)

whoa lol wtf

MOMO??? THIS HAS MOMO WRITTEN ALL OVER IT DAMMIT

-- SWEET MOTHER OF FUCK

“SORRY MIDORIYA-SAN, I LEFT MY FUCKING CHILL AT HOME IN THE LOCKER NEXT TO IIDA’S HELMET” holy shit lmao

and here I thought she’d get a flashback to her time on the Baku Rescue Squad or something. but nope, no flashbacks from Momo, only terrifying sci-fi torture devices

poor Dark Shadow is such a trooper omg

“why am I the only one who has to make prolonged contact with his smelly disgusting self” taking one for the team there DS

FUCK YEAH KAMINARI NO JUTSU

THE PRICKLY BASTARD WHISPERER STRIKES AGAIN!! don’t suppose you brought any clean clothes you could sneakily force him into huh Kami

okay here we go, so now Shouji and Tokoyami are joining forces

um excuse me this is fucking awesome

wonder how he’ll break free? don’t think he’ll reveal Fa Jin until the end of the chapter, so maybe Air Force or something? idk

TOKO GETS AN EXTENDED MOMENT BECAUSE HE IS A TIER TWO PATREON REWARD LEVEL FRIEND YAY

WHY IS MOMO MAKING THIS FACE LOL YOUR THING WAS WAY WORSE

and Shouji just casually hitting him with what is easily the best comment from anyone yet. too bad Deku’s just gonna ignore it. you deserve better Shouji

KAMINARI OMFG

it only just occurred to me that Kami is currently trapped inside Dark Shadow right along with him lmao omg. realest one in the entirety of BnHA, right here. we will never forget your sacrifice

aaaaaaand Deku’s yeeting himself

do you really hate the thought of taking a bath that much my dude

oh shit the mask!!

-- oh shit the feels

o(TヘTo)

fuck. and I mean, we knew he was crying, that was a done deal. but still, to see him in this much pain is just...

and the acknowledgement that he knows they’re worried about him, but that it doesn’t change his mind one bit. this, right here, is why they have to be a bit harsh with him, you guys. because they’re up against the full, unbridled stubbornness of Midoriya fucking Izuku, and if they don’t match that stubbornness with an equal stubbornness of their own, they basically don’t stand a chance

(ETA: quick note that there is apparently another mistranslation here -- rather than saying that his friends are oblivious to the danger, what Deku is actually saying is that none of his friends have activated his Danger Sense once throughout this entire fight. which I had been wondering about, and it turns out Horikoshi actually confirmed it. so basically none of the kids bears any ill intent toward him, and there’s literal proof right there.

incidentally, as @class1akids pointed out, this also casts an interesting light on this chapter in terms of who hasn’t fought Deku yet. not to play the Hagakure Traitor Music for the billionth time you guys, but I’M JUST SAYING lol.)

anyway, but the good news is that they all seem to understand that. and the even better news is that we have reached the tier 3 friends!!

“OR ELSE” lol, great to see Shouto wielding his friendship just as aggressively as Deku once did towards him. I do love a good role reversal

p.s., ANTICIPATED DISCOURSE: “why is Shouto being so cruel to Deku can’t he see how hard this is on him”

PREEMPTIVE REBUTTAL: this is a callback to the classic “even heroes cry when they have to” Shouto line from chapter 137. Shouto is clearly following Kacchan’s lead here and going for the more ruthless approach, knowing that the gentle approach isn’t getting through to him (if anything it’s only making him more stubborn as we saw on the previous page). basically it’s his way of pointing out that even heroes are still only human, and so is Deku last time he checked

ah okay, and there Tsuyu is at last

okay real talk, I get why Tsuyu is included in the tier 3 friends, because she was one of the first people to team up with Deku going all the way back to USJ. but that said, this probably would have had more impact if their most recent interaction hadn’t been like 150 chapters ago

but anyway though it’s still a good speech. maybe not quite a cliffhanger-level speech, but a good speech nonetheless. in a way though, I’m glad to see that Horikoshi seemingly didn’t give a fuck whether he ended this on an actual cliffhanger or not for once

and that “headed toward the climax” part has me excited too, ngl. because if we really are getting to the so-called climax this soon, that makes me even more certain that there is indeed a DvK3 in the forecast. so I presume that next week (or I guess two weeks from now) will be the tier 3s along with the remaining tier 2s like Kirishima and Aoyama

and then after that, well... [orange and green banners being hoisted] [sound of screeching airhorns and vuvuzelas in the distance] [sound of All Might approaching in his car which I didn’t notice until I looked back at this page a second time whoops] THE PROPHECY WILL NOT BE DENIED

#bnha 320 #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #asui tsuyu #tokoyami fumikage #kaminari denki #todoroki shouto #class 1-a #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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