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random-imagines-blog · 3 years

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Disarm {Shadow Moon x Sibling!Reader}

Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 2541 Summary: Wednesday is on a mission to pull you and Shadow apart. Neither you, nor Shadow, or having any of that.

“And that is why I don’t think y/n should come with us, Shadow.” Wednesday seemed to enjoy speaking to your brother as if you weren’t there. As if you weren’t in the booth beside the tall, muscular man who had been your best friend since the day that you had been adopted by his wonderful mother. He had been messing with the climates of your relationship, trying to make things stormy when things were set to be clear. Trying was the key word here. You looked to your brother, and he looked to you, and you knew what he was going to say in response. And you were proud to have such a loyal brother - one who knew that you were better with him than without. One who wasn’t going to leave you at home because you were a ‘weirdo’. A freak. Even the Gods seemed to look at you like that - mainly the old ones. You would think that after hundreds, even thousands of years, there would be nothing that would surprise them. Let alone someone like you, who defined themselves as nonbinary.

“No,” Shadow said with a shrug, completely dismissing everything that Wednesday had said. “I’m not leaving them behind.”

You looked at the old man across from you with a smug expression. You didn’t like him from the start. He had an untrustworthy air. Him and his friends. You thought that Mad Sweeney was a bit funny, and Ostera was a wonderful woman but everyone else, you could take or leave. When he had offered Shadow a job, he took it with a couple of conditions. One of those was that you would accompany him. He had just lost his wife. He wasn’t willing to part with the only other person that he had left. Which was you. And since you had nothing else going on, just a dead-end job in a town that you didn’t care for, you found it easy to pack up and snooze in the back of the car while driving down the dusty highways of the country.

“Now, now, Shadow, don’t be hasty,” The man said, bringing his mug up to his lips. He looked small in that moment, and there was a glint in his eye that you weren’t fond of. This was an old God who was used to getting his way. And for the first time, someone was fighting back. He probably hadn’t expected that someone to be his son.

“I’m not being hasty,” Shadow said, quickly retorting back. “I’ve thought about it, and my answer is fuck you.”

“Shadow...” Wednesday said, a warning in his voice. You leaned forward, grabbing a couple of the sugars out of the little canister, and started to juggle them, getting the attention away from your brother.

“We’ve made it this far together,” You said, trying to reason. Poking the bear wouldn’t help anyone out in this situation. You’ve already tried that before, and ended up getting hurt because of it. “And we’ve done alright, wouldn’t you say? Okay, maybe there was a famine and Laura is back from the dead and the bullet guy is dead but we’re alive and we’re doing alright. We got a good thing going here. Let’s just keep it that way and not give each other anymore grief.”

“Bit late for that,” Shadow said, folding his hands in front of him and looked out the window. You glared at him - his input was usually nice, but now he was just stirring the pot.

“I just don’t want to see y/n get hurt,” Wednesday said, clapping to get Shadow’s attention back. “And if she-”

“They,” You corrected for the dozenth time today.

“- keeps following us around and getting involved in the war, it’s going to happen eventually. Remember Vulcan?”

You winced at the memory of the bullet God. You were glad that he was dead, thrown into the fire to become what he loved so much. Because of him, you had ended up getting shot. You and your damn mouth, getting you into trouble all the time. It hadn’t been a particularly dangerous shot, since it missed your arteries, but it still had hurt like a bitch. It was still wrapped up, underneath the frumpy sweater that you were wearing to keep yourself rather low-key.

“If you had given us any warning about what we were getting ourselves into, maybe it wouldn’t have happened,” Shadow said, still in a mood. The conversation took a lull for a moment as the waitress came around and put our heaping plates in front of us. I thanked her with a smile, then waited until she walked away to interject.

“Yeah, maybe if we weren’t with someone who had as many enemies, I might not have gotten shot.” You pointed out, looking pointedly at the old man across from you.

“Maybe if he had been looking where he was going-” Wednesday started to say again.

“They!” You jumped up, slamming your hands down on the table. “What is so difficult about they that you can’t understand? You’re ancient. You know a lot of words. Say this one with me. Th - ey. They.”

Wednesday gave you a dirty look which came through his bad eye as well as his good. You weren’t intimidated by him, though. He was an old God with old powers. He needed Shadow, and if he were to kill you, Shadow would not co-operate. It was as simple as that.

The restaurant had gone quiet at your outburst, but when you gave them nothing more to stare at, they cultivated their own conversations up to a peasant murmur once more. You lowered yourself back down onto the booth, and Shadow put his hand between your shoulders to keep you from jumping up again. And you noticed him subtly moving objects such as the napkin rack out of the way so you couldn’t hurl them at Wednesday’s head. Probably a good idea.

You distracted yourself with the food that was put in front of you. The usual greasy diner fare you had gotten used to during this road trip.

“Y/N is staying with us,” Shadow said, leaving no room for disagreement on the matter. “There’s no reason that you can give that’s good enough.”

You stuck your tongue out at Wednesday, playing a not so tactile card, but you were just so pleased to be getting your way. He put his hands up in surrender, though he still had a calculating look on his face. “Fine - fine, if that is what you want, Shadow, that is what you’ll get.”

“Why does it feel like we just made a deal with an evil genie?” You asked Shadow.

“They prefer to be called Djinn-” Wednesday cut in as Shadow nodded.

“Oh, so you’re all about what they prefer to be called. But I don’t matter enough to have my own pronouns respected? Rude, Wednesday. Rude.”

You lounged in the backseat of the Wednesday’s car, back against the door, and feet up on the seat. The God kept fiddling with the dial, and then set it onto some jazz croner who gave you an instant headache.

“Do you know any enchantments, Wednesday?” You asked, playing with the seatbelt strap. He turned around to look at you, his eyes shielded by the ridiculous straw hat that he was wearing on his head.

“Why?” He questioned, since you rarely ever asked him anything.

“Is there one to make me temporarily deaf? Because this song is seriously causing me some pain. A bit of hearing loss wouldn’t go amiss.”

“Ask and you shall-” Odin started, but Shadow cut him off.

“Do not deafen y/n,” He ordered. “And stop complaining back there. I’ve heard the music you listen to. This is a gift compared to that.”

You crossed your arms and side dramatically, hanging your head backwards against the window.

“Bored, bored, bored,” You muttered under your breath, tapping the back of your head against the glass with each mention of the word. “Are there any attractions or something on this road? Like a museum? Or a hot dog shack? Bro, we gotta get a couple of footlongs. Road trips are nothing without the dogs. I don’t even know how we survived this long without them.”

“We’re not making a stop until we get to the destination,” Wednesday said, pulling the hat down over his eyes, clearly ready to take a snooze.

“We’re not making a stop until we get to the destination,” You mocked. Wednesday didn’t give you a response, so you had no fuel left to throw on the fire. Maybe taking a nap wasn’t such a bad idea. The beds in the motels that you’ve been staying in were lumpy. And they were the sort that took quarters in order to vibrate so you really hadn’t felt comfortable staying on them. You had laid out some of your clothes on top of the bedspread and slept on them, trying to make a barrier between yourself and the bacteria. It hadn’t worked very well.

You woke up an hour later, though there was no noise that had roused you. Rather, the car had come to a complete stop. You looked around to see that you were still in the middle of nowhere, but there was a stall up ahead. A woman was selling berries. In the middle of nowhere.

Shadow unclicked his seatbelt and was starting to get out of the car. You grabbed at his shoulder and tried to keep him in place but he looked like he didn’t hear you. You hurried out through your own door and circled ahead of him, walking backwards so he wouldn’t bump into you. “What happened to no stops?” You asked.

“I’m hungry,” He said, his broad frame catching up to you quickly, and then passing you. You had to jog to keep up.

“You do realize this is suspicious as hell, right? Look at where we are. It’s all ... fields. There are no berrybushes or anything around here. Where did she get them, and why is she selling them here, where no one drives?”

“You’re being paranoid,” Shadow said. You noticed, though, that he was looking straight ahead, his eyes never deviating. Right at the woman in the sundress on the side of the road who was beckoning for both of you to come closer. You shook your head - this was too damn weird.

“I’m serious Shadow,” You said, sensing that something wasn’t right here. Wednesday was no help, he was still napping in the passenger seat of the car. You could see him from where you were standing. “This sounds like a bad greek tale or something. I don’t trust it. I’ll buy you all you want to eat at the next rest stop, just please, get back in the car.”

“There’s nothing to worry about,” Shadow said, nudging you aside to go up to the woman. You turned around to take the sight of her in and - and she was beautiful. Not like a supermodel with angular features, but someone who just seemed to radiate love and life. Voluptious. Dimples. A great smile. Silky hair. The brightest eyes that you had ever seen.

“Come on sugar, don’t you want to try some fresh berries?” She asked, holding out a basket of blueberries.

You had to shake your head to release yourself from the temptation. It wasn’t all that hard. For you, it was a split second of hunger, and the thought of a pie. It was an easy temptation to get rid of. But Shadow was giving in - giving in way too easily. You never actually saw him eat berries before, so this was extremely suspicious. Trying to get him to return to the car with your words was clearly not working.

So you acted a little hastily. Rather than try to pull Shadow away, which would be damn near impossible given the size of him, you turned to the woman. She was smiling at you, trying to entice you to take a berry. Shadow was reaching inside of the basket, and pulled out one that looked perfectly ripe. Perfectly round.

You thrust your arms up under the basket, pushing hard on the bottom of it, making the woman jolt. She let go of the basket in surprise, and the berries flew into the air, then scattered on the ground around the three of you. “Look at what you did!” The woman screamed, falling onto her knees. It was like a curtain had been pulled, and light was seeping through - for you and Shadow were able to see more clearly now. The once beautiful woman was an old crone. Really like something out of Grimm brothers. Shadow pulled back in a dazed disgust, and looked around him.

“Where are we?” He asked, holding his head.

“Never mind that, get in the car, go, go, go!” You said, rushing him, pushing his back. He stared to jog back towards the car, turning his head over his shoulder to look at the stall. The woman was still on the ground, screeching, trying to put all of the berries back into her basket. You didn’t have much time before she would have collected them all. You had to get out of here.

You threw yourself into the backseat, and you didn’t have time to put your seatbelt on before Shadow was pressing down on the gas pedal and getting you the hell out of there.

“What happened?” Wednesday grunted, pulling the hat up from over his eyes.

“I don’t know,” Shadow said, still confused. He adjusted the rearview mirror but you popped your head up to try to block him from seeing out the back.

“Don’t even look, Shads,” You warned. “She might have all her berries back in her basket.”

“Rickity old stall?” Wednesday guessed.

“You know it?”

“It means that they know where we’re going and which way that we’re taking,” Wednesday said gloomily. “Good on you, Shadow, for not giving into the temptation. Many people have fallen-”

“You’re giving him all the credit? Really?” You asked, completely in disbelief. “He was over there like Narcissus to a mirror! I was the one who stopped it by hitting the damn basket.”

“It’s true,” Shadow agreed. “Y/N saw right through it.”

Wednesday didn’t say anything for a long moment. You didn’t think that he was going to at all. You just settled right back into the seat, looking through the windshield at the long road ahead.

“I guess you should continue with us then,” He said. You knew it was hard for the old God to admit any sort of defeat, so maybe you would let it go graciously..

Nah.

“In your face, sucker,” You said with a smirk.

#Shadow Moon #Shadow Moon oneshot #American Gods #American Gods oneshot #request #oneshot #oneshots #shadowm

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afterspark-podcast · 3 years

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My Little Pony/Transformers: Friendship in Disguise, Part 1 Transcript

[This can also be found on AO3!]

[Stinger]

O: So I'm like, “No, I'm just fine with pretending this never happened, honestly.”

[Intro Music]

O: Welcome to our April Fool’s Special!

S: The Transformers/My Little Pony: Friendship in Disguise crossover.

O: Specifically, issues 1 and 2 here. An episode covering issues 3 and 4 will be released in a few weeks. Um, so obviously our podcast doesn't normally talk about ponies.

S: For all that it too was a popular Hasbro franchise in the 80’s- I mean, still is.

O: Yes. I will attempt to give a short blip about My Little Pony characters that show up, but we're gonna kind of assume that you know the mane six. Which is Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie. Ah, Specs has seen some of the My Little Pony episodes, whereas I have seen... all of it at this point. Um, so I'm reasonably familiar with most of the characters. And uh, for the record, Twilight Sparkle is my favorite, but that's because she's basically me. [laughs]

S: This was a crossover comic that was released in 2020 (for your information).

O: Uh, most of the Transformers characters in here are part of kind of the regular G1 cast that you're all probably used to seeing in various things. Most of them we've talked about. There's a few we haven't um, because they just haven't popped up in the series yet. [Like Arcee.] The exceptions being Gauge who's from IDW2, and Windblade who's from IDW1, Cyberverse, and several other things.

S: Mm-hm. They did some fun things with the fonts and some of the other visuals in this.

O: Such as using the Transformers font for ‘Equestria’ and the My Little Pony font for ‘Cybertron’.

S: Mm-hm. And the character’s speech bubbles use the fonts from their respective series.

O: Some of the issues are done by who I think is the current artist for the My Little Pony comic series. While the rest are done by Transformers comic artists- like, plural, several of them.

S: And with that we begin.

O: Part 1: Transformation Is Magic!

S: In Equestria, a pony by the name of Quibble Pants is standing in front of a newsstand complaining about some very applicable meta issues.

O: Quibble's a side character. His whole shtick is that he picks apart plot and whatnot.

S: He's a bit of a nitpicker.

O: The newsstand pony tells Quibble (and by extension us) that this is all for fun. So don't worry too much about continuity here, guys.

S: Mm-hm, a loud clap of thunder transitions us to a nearby mountaintop where Queen Chrysalis is up to nefarious plots

O: She [Chrysalis] is villain. She is the queen of the changelings. She can transform into different creatures, basically, or different ponies. I think, judging by some of the background characters in some scenes later, that this is after she's lost control of most of the other changelings? Though she does have a small group working with her here.

S: She plans to bring forth other changelings from other worlds to take over Equestria.

O: I'm sure you can see where- where this is going. [laughs]

S: Mm-hm, and now, on cybertron.

O: The Autobots and Decepticons are fighting, shocker.

S: The Decepticons are clearly trying to take control of a malfunctioning space bridge.

O: A space bridge that Shockwave is convinced is breaching other dimensions.

S: Suddenly, all of the Autobots and Decepticons are zapped away through a portal.

O: Leaving only poor Grimlock to smash into view a few seconds later... thinking they have all ditched him.

S: Poor Grimlock.

O: Poor Grimlock. [laughs]

S: Back in Equestria, Twilight shows up with several royal guards to stop Chrysalis but it's too late and a portal opens, sending the Cybertronians zooming past through the air.

O: Twilight is horrified to see that Chrysalis has summoned living things that are about to go ‘splat’ onto the ground, or more likely ‘crunch’! [laughs]

S: Or possibly clank, if someone slows them down-

O: [laughs]

S: But I mean, who knows? Twilight speeds off to try and save the newly arrived Cybertronians. While Chrysalis stays behind to acquaint herself with Megatron.

O: Bee is both surprised and resigned to see himself falling to a colorful death.

S: But Optimus grabs Bee's hand, and intends to break his fall with his own body.

O: Optimus, are you okay? Do you need to talk? I feel like you need to talk. We need- we need to get you into therapy, dude.

S: It's all the self-sacrificing, but yes.

O: [laughs]

S: Yes, he needs some therapy. The two are saved by Twilight’s a very timely arrival and magical powers.

O: The Cybertronians are just as surprised by the ponies, as the ponies are of them.

S: Bee attempts to blend in by transforming into vehicle mode, to Twilight's consternation. But Twilight says that doesn't really help him blend in, but it's okay if they're different!

O: She comments on their ‘shape-shifting magic’ and that Chrysalis will be disappointed that they're friendly.

S: To which Optimus says... unfortunately, they are not all friendly.

O: And then we are given the most amazing image. [laughs]

S: Queen Chrysalis, as happy as a kid in a candy store, on top of a tank, aka Megatron.

O: Seriously, it's one of the best images in the comic. [dissolves into laughter] And one that was shared I think, pretty frequently after the comic came out? So it's very funny.

S: Mm-hm.

O: And we begin part 2 of issue 1: Shine Like A Diamond.

S: Rarity and her staff at her Manehattan boutique have been volun-told to get Starscream all dolled up for his coronation.

O: You know, the outfit he's in in the G1 movie, the purple cape and the crown get up.

S: Rarity attempts to calm him down, because he is being a snippy asshole during all of this.

O: Yes, with vague, implied threats throughout.

S: Mm-hm, so Rarity says, “Happy, healthy subjects show just how good their king is, don't they?”

O: A car is heard in the distance, much to Starscream's surprise, as he didn't think the ponies had cars. Which, he is correct!

S: Mm-hm, Arcee barrels into him with a flying kick.

O: And Starscream retreats.

S: Leaving Arcee and Rarity to introduce themselves.

O: They seem to become fast friends as Rarity thanks Arcee, and Arcee tries to help clean up the mess Starscream has made.

S: Unfortunately, Starscream returns with the rest of his trine in tow.

O: Arcee intends to fight them alone, but Rarity generates a magic shield to help protect Arcee while she fires on the jets.

S: Thundercracker takes a direct hit, while Starscream and Skywarp are herded closer together by Arcee's fire.

O: Once they're close enough, Rarity uses her magic to wrap the fabric from Starscream's cape, that she was helping make earlier, around the two of them.

S: Skywarp says, “This is stupid! I'm out,” and teleports away.

O: Leaving Starscream to nosedive to the ground with a boom.

S: Arcee compliments an exhausted Rarity on her help.

O: While they both agree they would do anything for their friends, and for each other! Now, you may notice that none of the My Little Pony characters have been shown in the Transformers universe, but that is about to change.

S: In issue 2, part 1: Inspiring.

O: It would seem that Twilight's assistant, Spike (the dragon) is wandering around the Ark writing a letter to Twilight.

S: Of course, with Grimlock being the only one left behind, he's presumably found Spike and brought him to the Ark.

O: Spike is of course very enamored with the big old Dinobot.

S: And Grimlock seems to like Spike quite a bit too. Even holding him in his open palm while they get an alert from Teletraan about an attack.

O: Said attack, by way of the Constructicons, who have come to destroy the Ark while everyone else is away.

S: Grimlock transforms into dino mode and meets them.

O: Grimlock makes the mistake of saying, “Puny Decepticons, even together you no match for Grimlock!”

S: To which, they respond by forming Devastator, and stomping the absolute crap out of him. “Grimlock and Grimlock's big mouth.”

O: Spike shouts words of encouragement to Grimlock, but quickly sees that the Dinobot is losing.

S: So he thinks, looks at the Ark, comes to a realization, and then runs inside to make his realization happen.

O: Inside, Spike flips through two large books. ‘Modern Cybertronian For Everyday Conversations’ and ‘Teletraan I For Dummies’.

S: He then climbs onto Teletraan’s console and starts the main engine cycle countdown.

O: Spike yells at Grimlock to get down.

S: Which is, you know, not that hard as Devastator is still stomping on him.

O: Devastator is then blasted by the bit of the Ark that's still sticking out of the ground, causing Devastator to fall to pieces.

S: The Constructicons flee, and Spike checks on Grimlock. Spike still feels pretty down about himself, because all he did was press some buttons. But Grimlock says Spike did even more than he did.

O: “Spike learned new language, and operations system in short time! Spike think of using busted engine as canon! Spike use pronouns!”

S: Grimlock tells Spike that Spike inspires him, and that he's full of potential.

O: Spike collapses into a happy little puddle of dragon that Grimlock called him, “Inspiring.” Their friendship is so cute! [laughs]

S: And now it's time for part 2 of issue 2: They Eat Ponies, Don't They?

O: We are brought onto the stage of a cooking show, “Prepping With Pinkie,” hosted by Pinkie Pie.

S: And a special guest, Gauge!

O: And all I can think is- Arcee she still one of her parents in this continuity? Is Arcee worried about her child!? [laugh]

S: And in the spirit of cultural exchange, Pinkie and Gauge will be sharing some of their favorite recipes in today's program. I never thought about giant robots having recipes before this, and I didn't want to think about it.

O: [laughs] Pinkie is, of course, making cupcakes. While Gauge has brought iron filing casserole.

S: Poor Pinkie and ah, several audience members are questioning their decision based on their facial expressions.

O: Pinkie goes to start her cupcakes, but suddenly everything starts shaking.

S: [singing] Dun, dun, dunnnn!

O: [snorts]

S: A space bridge appears with Shockwave stepping out of it.

O: He has, by his own admission, come to ‘spice things up.’

S: Ah, time for some puns. Unfortunately, his recipes require a bit more audience participation.

O: Shockwave’s apparently come to discover how much pony it takes to fuel one Decepticon.

S: [sighs]

O: [laughs]

S: He transforms his hands into a grater and a whisk, respectively.

O: Pinkie and Gauge evade him, causing him to demand that they stay still so he can finish his experiments.

S: Oh god, by attempting to whisk them!?

O: [laughs] I know, I know! I'm not saying it's sane!

S: I know, I mean, I read it too.

O: [laughs]

S: It’s just, now I have vivid mental images of this being attempted and everyone being very…

O: Confused? [laughs]

S: Yes. Gauge whacks him in the head with a cookie sheet, completely bending it out of shape, and tries to get Pinkie to flee.

O: Pinkie refuses, but in the background the show's audience is running through the exit door- at least part of their audience is running through the exit- exit door.

S: Mm-hm. Shockwave transforms his hands again, this time to a spork and spatula. Sporking them to death is not gonna work, dude!

O: Tell him that! [laughs]

S: Mm-hm, again, with the mental images. Gauge rips off the spork and spatula, sending Shockwave falling backwards, where Pinkie trips him.

O: Pinkie and Gauge grab some frying pans and bean Shockwave's face in between them.

S: Shockwave, thoroughly beaten by a small Cybertronian child and a pony, is kicked back into the space bridge and disappears.

O: The remaining audience claps.

S: And 47 minutes later, the duo tries the other's culinary... contributions.

O: Pinkie declares it as success, though her face implies she didn't enjoy the iron filing casserole.

S: In the background, Gauge is clearly trying to politely spit out the cupcake in a towel. [laughs]

O: And that ends issue 2. So, join us next time for issues 3 and 4 where we will finish this mini-series.

S: And that just about wraps it up for us today. Remember to check us out on Tumblr or Pillowfort as Afterspark-Podcast for any additional information, show notes, or links we may have mentioned. You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter at AftersparkPod (all one word), and various other locations by searching for Afterspark Podcast, such as AO3, iTunes, Spotify, and Youtube, just to name a few. And feel free to send us questions on Tumblr, Youtube, or AO3. Till next time, I’m Specs.

O: And I’m Owls!

S: Toodles.

[Outro Music Plays]

#transcript #afterspark #afterspark podcast #friendship in disguise 1 #friendship in disguise 2

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shy-magpie · 4 years

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RQG 151

Moving the patreon names a good idea but changes to structure take up more brain space than they should. I hope they keep the reminder they moved it as a substitute, at least for a while. The rest of the structure is the same and I can feel my shoulders coming away from my ears as the theme plays. I choose to interpret that as Alex saying his players being fine is his highest priority. Borb Under the sea bed🎵. 1)its great when I barely start a thought before a player says the same thing 2) we will get our musical one way or the other 3)I know they're from an improv background but it never ceases to delight how joyfully they support each other's unexpected bits. 4) Alex seems like he gets a kick out of playing up his annoyance at the musical idea more than actually being frustrated it keeps coming up. I thought so but nice to confirm. Bless this cast, it wouldn't have been a huge deal if they let Alex's description stand but its so nice they not only corrected it, they did so without hesitation and Alex seemed to appreciate the help in getting to better phrasing rather than take it as an accusation. Not that I thought he would but feeling grateful for RQ not falling into behavior I see elsewhere. Also hearing everyone chiming in; with Bryn being the one to name check the trope instead of it being on Helen to always take the lead is nice to hear. "he was very encountered" Have I mentioned lately that I love literally everything about this show? Even when he thinks he knows exactly what the party is going to do and certainly knows what he is guiding them towards Alex checks instead of putting anyone in the position of having to derail. Cel! I wonder if cis people get anywhere near my joy in Cel having that kind of control over their body. I mean its just objectively cool even without the gender aspect so I hope they at least enjoy that much. I need cancan art. Did Alex know how delighted Lydia would be with the image of being popped out like a cork before he said it? Coo coo ca chu, thank you Ben Zolf remains 200% done and doesn't bother checking the door Ben don't! 92 HP, well that would be comforting if it wasn't Zolf. Like I don't think it's actually a death wish/that he is suicidal but well, see not checking the door. He is far too comfortable with the idea of being hurt. Alex:Chill sea dude Ben: sounds of objection Lydia: chill environment neutral dude Still love Alex's set design. A person! Bryn sounds alarmed about implications of the walk ways. Cel can shield themselves. Yes Hamid can armor himself! Also casts fly on himself & Azu. Thank you Ben/Zolf. This show does get deep into moral quandaries sometimes but unless these guys are as drugged as the Kobolds they objectively need to die. The dice love us Altruism run Darn it Alex, are you hinting they are drugged against their will? Azu feels tapping their shoulder then killing them is better even if they don't have a prayer of defending themselves. Oh I see Helen has our back and is checking for mind control before we do Kobolds 2: the guilt continues. Well yes they are surprised Bryn sounds so pleased as goes through exactly how many ways the odds are in Hamid's favor. Then he rolls 6,6,5,5 on D6s for 26 damage so no kill like over kill. Watsonian explanation: emotion is at least partially fueling Hamid's magic especially anything fire/desolation aligned, and there is no way he isn't overflowing with emotion after the last few hours. Zolf is happy to let Azu handle the last one and uses his action to ask if Cel knows what (something, the equipment in this room?) does. Cel determines its a notification board for the cell cavern. So these guys were directly aware and involved with the mistreatment of the Kobolds. I officially am dropping the last tiny part of me that cared if they were drugged/otherwise forced into the work. If they were cognisant enough to read that and still did it then its time to find Zolf's old bucket. Glad the table is having fun! I wonder what the face Alex pulled looked like. Raw terror? The equivalent of a neon sign reading "I'm screwed"? I shouldn't have implied Alex would leave the listeners out, this is a wonderful description. Helen is more thorough than I am. There you go, time to die. Oh episode name drop. That's my Zolf, killing who needs killing doesn't mean we ignore collateral damage. And Cel just invented the departures board. Zolf: not worth destroying? Cel: If you'd enjoy it Priorities Heading towards the shore I like how Alex sounds pleased they broke his dungeon Vital info for visualizing this. Poor Azu is trying to swim while Hamid & Cel are zooming elegantly and Zolf is walking because boots or no he is ungainly. Hamid enjoying flying & Azu being adorable even under the circumstances is endearing. Correction Cel is walking Lockers & propaganda posters I can't put it in words but there is a connection being made between how little these mooks care about messing up shared spaces & the rest of the mundane evil that led to them being bucket worthy. Thank you all for the taking water breathing potions I'm not sure how I feel about Alex giving us stuff for free Oh Dear! Are the mooks heading to the village? Zolf is reassuring Never over the little touches Alex has to make the world feel more real like the water proof flares Oh Cel dear, 1)you don't know that, you don't need mourn your village while they yet may live 2)what kind of trauma have they been through? "Again"? Lydia gets a quick dig in about the party not being allowed to sleep. Cel shifts into a creature who can see. ~Break~ Nevermind just enlarge person Somewhere Babs is begging for a simple answer. I don't think we got a simple answer Hamid is reassuring Cel. Something both relateable and possibly a bad sign that "don't worry they have been spending all their time preparing to kill us, so they can't be attacking your people" is legitimately both the line Hamid took and probably the most effective possible. The others help too. I love how they openly care, reassuring Cel without telling them to repress or that they are wrong to experience the emotions in the first place. Lights and colors flashing in the water. The dice seem to be favoring Bryn today. There's a fight up ahead. They all run to the fight, Cel leaves them in the dust. Hamid flies after Cel since he couldn't catch up on foot The dice do know I promise I will appreciate the set design on relisten, but for the love of god who is fighting who? Mooks vs who? Humans Yes! Alex hasn't quite gotten there but the cast sound convinced its Barnes & Carter. Ah is Wilde with them? Did Wilde tear his hair out worrying then send back up the second Zolf was overdue? Bleeping Carter Barnes sounds like he is having fun Carter is throwing knives at people. Odd knife & dagger are basically synonyms but not getting Sasha feels 2 vs 8 Ben points out Carter stole Sasha's gimmick Ok warming to Carter will take a minute but I already like Barnes Natural 1 on bomb throwing. Thank you Alex for not being a "death by nat 1 is funny" GM Alex keeps forgetting what a bad bum Cel is. Giblet heavy day Moving quickly past possible misgendering of Cel. Best way to handle that I think, no distracting corrections but Lydia doesn't let it stand. Thank you for being safe Hamid! Hamid protects Barnes. Love the extra extra pew. Finger guns! Alex is 3rd person level stressed Cel gets out the crossbow and punctuates their correction on pronouns. I love this podcast. I really, really, love this podcast and stuff like that shows they love their listeners back. Cel: Pronouns. Are. They. Them Helen: the dice say they/them rights Not sure if dead but 13 damage against one misgendering mook Hamid continues to shoot very well in support rather than endangering himself needlessly. Azu, spotting Carter: You! You? Accidently restarted the episode when I unpaused and now my phone is acting up, and is doing strange things when I try to fast forward to where I was. The annoyance at the above is cancelled out by hearing "Pronouns. Are. They/Them" 4 times Zolf: great seeing you again I love Barnes Alex the fandom appreciates this description Ah Zolf got Barnes into the Campbell books And they attempt to flee badly Carter finally rolls decently but not impressively Cel shoots one in the neck they're still moving Hamid mutters in draconic: this is for the Kobolds Thank you Bryn Barnes successfully seduced <Azu> Helen I love that the trained mathematician is the one who participates in dice superstition Ben! Huh patreon names still make my brain happy. Wonder if it's something deep about community or I just got pavloved by it being before RQG & TMA for so long

#RQG spoilers #Rusty Quill Gaming #live blog thingy #RQG season 4 #RQG 151 #long post

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romancingromanoff · 5 years

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Imagine Being In The MCU And Going On Ellen Part 1/3 (Scarlett Johansson x reader)

Part 2

You’re a guest on the Ellen show and also currently dating Scarlett Johansson. I just really love Ellen and pretending that I’m a part of the Avengers cast family like it’s a huge fantasy of mine that will never come true (rip my hopes and dreams) so I decided to make it three parts haha. BONUS POINTS IF YOU KNOW WHERE CARLA SHAW IS FROM. Reader is of an unspecified gender, I use they/them pronouns. Also, part 3 of What Happens At Disney is coming soon :)

Jumping up and down in front of the mirror in your dressing room you kept trying various dance moves to see how they looked. It was Ellen so of course you had to dance out onto the stage when she introduced you! Though you had technically met with her before at Chris Hemsworth’s birthday party, it was really just a quick “hello,” “how are you,” and a funny comment from her that made you laugh. So nerves were naturally part of the reason why you were so angst at the moment and felt like you had to get rid of a bunch of pent up energy.

Your door opened which almost made you choke on the sip of water you had in your mouth. “Y/N, you’re one in five!” the crew member tapped her watch and you could only respond with a noise that sounded a little bit like “mmhmm” with your mouth still full of your drink. Taking one last glance in the mirror, you flashed some finger guns at your reflection, immediately regretted that cringed decision, then stepped foot out into the hallway where another crew person was waiting to escort you to your place.

From stage right behind the curtain you could hear the audience’s hysteria gradually calming down after they had all won $1000 Target gift cards and Ellen sat down to introduce you. “Our next guest has taken the world by storm since we fell in love with them as Obie’s hilarious best friend, Mason, in the Netflix Original Series ‘Time To Dive.’ After a suspenseful appearance in the modern remake of ‘High Noon’ with John Hamm they joined the Avengers as a recruit with some pretty neat morphing abilities in Marvel’s newest film which is coming out next Friday. Please welcome Y/F/N Y/L/N!”

You were so overwhelmed by everyone in the crowd jumping up and down that a huge smile covered your face as you tried waving to them all while also keeping a beat in your step, which was hard to do when you couldn’t hear the music very well. Approaching the couches that you had watched all of your favorite celebrities sit in was just surreal and Ellen opening her arms up to hug you was the cherry on top. “Hi, how are you?” she said underneath the wave of all the cheering so that only you would hear.

“I’m good, thank you so much! Thank you so much for having me,” you repeated what you last said as you sat down and the clapping had died down.

“So, this is your first time on the show,” Ellen smiled.

“Yes, yes it is. And I’m so happy to be here!”

“Well, thank you so much for taking the time to stop by. I know the press tours Marvel has you doing keep your schedule super busy.” The audience let out a series of “whoos” at the sound of Marvel being mentioned.

“It’s certainly crazy and I never could have dreamed about being a part of something like this but really it’s the fans that keep it going. We owe so much to them.”

“You must have your fair share of crazy run-ins since you, you know, signed a contract with them and everything. How has going out in public changed for you?”

“It’s funny, actually,” you laugh a little bit remembering an incident that occurred about a month ago. “I mean since ‘Time to Dive’ I’ve always had fans come up to me asking for pictures and autographs; stuff like that just at restaurants and a few public places. But since I was announced as a part of the Avengers cast and started filming the run-ins have gotten a lot more frequent and I’ve found that the Marvel fans are very... um... adamant,” you laugh. “They definitely know their stuff which never fails to blow my mind.”

“I guess ‘adamant’ is one way of putting it,” Ellen jokes and you chuckle along with the crowd. “But you actually had someone like demand to take a picture with you after you had just gotten out of surgery? Is that right?”

“Oh my gosh,” your pitch got so much higher when you turned around and saw the picture from that day on the giant screen behind you. “Yeah, so it was just wisdom tooth surgery, nothing super serious but I was pretty drugged up on painkillers and loopy to say the least. Wow, okay, yeah you can see how swollen my cheeks are, aw man, and that gauze in my mouth I just look completely dead!” you remarked on the image of you with your messy bun, glasses, and sweats on as you were being pushed out of the hospital in a wheelchair.

“But you were 100% fresh out of the operating room where you were under anesthesia and a complete hot mess?” Ellen laughed as you squirmed in your seat from a mixture of embarrassment and just laughing at how hilarious you looked and how strange the situation was then.

“I don’t know if ‘hot mess’ is how I would put it, but it was definitely strange.”

“And they drug you up pretty well for this surgery, right? Like there are a lot of people who film themselves or get a relative to film them post-surgery because they’re prone to say really crazy things.”

“Honestly, I think that a part of me just thought it was standard procedure,” you admit which makes the audience crack up. “I don’t remember it too well but the fan who’s crouching next to me in the picture basically stopped me and asked for a picture and I was probably just like ‘sure, why not?’ you know? Like everything was normal.”

“Speaking of pictures, there’s a photo of you and one of your co-stars going around that’s been building up a ton of talk over the last six months,” the audience cheers as the screenshot of your instagram post comes up. It’s probably your most favorite photograph in the whole world and you can’t help but smile upon seeing it. You are your girlfriend Scarlett weren’t too public with sharing all of the details about your relationship and you both valued privacy pretty highly. As a celebrity on instagram you were pretty inactive compared to a lot of others your age since you never went live, rarely posted on your story except to promote big press events, and would go weeks or even months before you’d upload something new to your feed. Even though the photo was from six months ago, it was actually the 4th most recent on your profile. Scarlett, of course, didn’t have any social media at all and you respected her wishes to try and keep a low profile online by never posting any photos of her and you, but this picture was the one exception that she had allowed.

“That is just adorable,” Ellen smiled and the audience followed with a giant “awwwwww” which made you blush. “So this was taken on snapchat?”

“Yeah, that’s the dog filter,” you point to Scarlett’s face which has the staple dog ears and nose on her in the center. But she’s also laughing so the big pink dog tongue is sticking out with her face all crunched up as you’re giving her a big kiss on the cheek. “We’ve been dating for a little over a year,” a lot more “awes” and hoots instantly follow which makes you laugh. “But that was the first time we both felt okay with posting a photo of us just being together. It was a surprise for a lot of people; including myself too.”

Ellen gets a mischievous look on her face and leans in really close to you. “You know, it’s funny that you mention surprises because I-”

“Oh no,” you gasp suddenly clutching the arms of the chair really tight and spinning your head around to check behind you. Absolutely EVERYONE in the cast had warned you about the pranks Ellen loved to play on her show that almost made some of them pee their pants in fear. A couple of years ago when you were just another regular Marvel fan that followed all of their talkshow appearances you had watched the videos of the Chrises or Scarlett being surprised by someone in a crazy costume on repeat. It was hilarious of course, but now being in a position where it might happen to you was terrifying. You were embarrassingly easy to scare and in that moment you took back all of the times you had laughed at others being surprised on the show.

“You can relax, nothing’s back there,” Ellen reassures you while chuckles and excited squeals fill the studio. “Or maybe there is.”

Your eyes widen again and your heart drops as you turn back around.

“But, no, no there isn’t,” Ellen corrects herself. “Or is there? I don’t know.” You anxiety keeps dropping then shooting back up as she plays with you and by now your neck is hurting from straining it back so much. “I’m just kidding, I do know. And there isn’t anything,” she finally settles the tension before looking straight into one of the cameras. “But we do have a good surprise and it is not scary, I swear, coming up after the break.” You’re clutching your speeding heart in both your hands as the Ellen theme music plays cueing the commercials. The clapping dies down quickly as a bunch of set workers being moving cameras and lighting and you follow the blonde you’ve admired for so long as she stands up and goes in for another hug.

“Hey, Y/N, you need some water?” she picks up a bottle from behind her chair and you nod. “HERE you go!” she pretends she’s about to splash it all on your shirt and you jump back making a panicked sound before you realize that she’s kept the top of it on and there’s nothing on you.

“Scarlett said to watch out for you!” you laugh and are happy to hear that your mic is off.

“Really? She did?” Ellen smiles like the two of you have known each other for years and it makes you a hundred times more comfortable. Most interviewers were so stiff and acted like robots off camera but you were finding Ellen to be extremely friendly and caring. “Me and Portia love you guys by the way.”

“Wow,” you can’t believe what you’ve just heard. “Thank you. I mean, thanks that is just crazy to hear. We love you two as well and I’ve always been a fan of your show; it’s what got me through school, haha. And, yes, Scarlett almost made me too scared to come on but I really wanted to meet you.”

“Well I’m glad that you came too. Hey, I heard that you and Scarlett were thinking about adopting a new pet?”

“Yes!” you nod your head excitedly. “We really want a dog. I grew up with two but I’m just worried about having to leave the little guy or girl at home for long periods of time or having to make them travel a lot with us.”

“Yeah I totally understand. But like for me, going home to my cats every evening and just laying on the couch with them and Portia is what keeps me sane.”

“Absolutely, same for me.”

“Woah, okay, can you just come stand over here for one second?” she pulls you to the side as a set worker instantly lifts your chair up and takes it away only to be replaced by two other crew members that have a full sized couch. That was strange. Usually you’d be told if there were going to be guests or fans that you’d have to interact with on shows but you just shrugged it off and assumed that a fan from the audience would be coming up to meet you and it was just a surprise. “Thanks.”

“And we’re back on in ten!” one of the producers yelled and you and Ellen took your seats. “Five, four, three....”

The audience was cheering once again as the music played. “Alright, we’re back with Y/F/N Y/L/N,” Ellen said looking into the camera. “And before we left we told you that there was a surprise for you.”

“Yes, and I’ve noticed that you’ve expanded the seating area so- oh wait,” you interrupted yourself to turn around to check and make sure nothing was behind you again which made the audience laugh.

“No, there’s nothing there. We actually have someone in the audience today who is a huge fan of yours that would just love to meet you.”

“Cool beans!” the audience starts shrieking and jumping up and down not knowing who it’s going to be.

“So the fan is actually completely blind but is a part time worker at Barnes & Noble and also operates rollercoasters at six flags during the summer.”

“Oh.... oh my God, I mean, that’s amazing I’d love to meet them,” you were suddenly very nervous about meeting this person.

“In a letter they wrote to us, they said ‘even though I cannot see my only dream in life is to see Y/N in person.’ From Duluth, Minnesota, please welcome Carla Shaw!”

Scanning the audience you finally catch sight of a very timid woman with frizzy red hair and dark sunglasses get up towards the top and smack dab in the middle of the aisle. Not so sure of what to do, you almost get up from your seat when you don’t see any crew members going over to help her as she shuffled her way past other audience members who are simply clapping and leaning away from her as she feels the tops of the chairs to walk towards the stairs. “I should probably help her,” you get up and jog off the stage to go assist this poor woman who’s waving her cane around feeling for where the steps are. You are shocked and almost appalled that no one else getting up to help her and you jog up the steps carefully and go to lock your elbow into hers so you can guide her down.

“Allow me,” you offer before she completely spazzes our in front of you tripping down two steps and throwing her cane in the air. “SHIT!” you scream and forget that this is daytime television. You immediately fall to your knees and go to try and help them up when you notice that they’re just sitting there laughing. That laugh. You know that laugh.

“Oh my God-“ you breath as they reach for their hair and pull off what is actually a wig and then take off the giant black glasses. “I cannot believe you!” you yell at Scarlett who’s laughing hysterically at your dumb face.

“Hey baby,” she says cheekily and you roll your eyes as the two of you get up together. The crowd is going completely bezerk and girls all around you and covering their faces with their hands, mascara dripping with tears of joy and disbelief. She pulls you in for a hug and the screams get louder which you didn’t even think was possible.

“Scarlett Johansson everybody!” Ellen is clapping from the stage as your girlfriend waves to some fans and the camera. You playfully bump your shoulder into her and she pushes you back like you’re two bumper cars as you walk down towards the stage. Once you’re up there, the two of you turn around to wave at the audience some more and you’re certain that your eardrums are permanently damaged.

“I’ll sit on this si- AHHHHHHH!”

“AHHHHH SHIT”

You both scream with horror in your eyes as you see the cushions from the couch launch into the air as a beastly looking guy dressed like a yeti explodes two feet in front of you. His growling almost gives you a heart attack and you and Scarlett instinctively clutch into each other with both of you trying to hide behind the other.

Your grip on your girlfriend is so tight and you don’t let go until the yeti guy has completely disappeared running offstage. Ellen is in a complete fit of laughter that has rendered her unable to stand. She’s laughing, struggling to take breaths when she needs to from her chair while high pitched screams continue to get louder and louder.

“WHY!?!” Scarlett looks at the blonde woman in horror and your fingers are up by your neck feeling for a pulse.

“Is that all the surprises? Please tell me there are no more surprises,” you cry for mercy.

The next part will be an interview with you and Scarlett where you discuss the upcoming movie, choose your favorite Chrises, and talk a little bit about your relationship

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seunghyuns-enbyfriend · 5 years

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BTS Reaction to S/O Coming Out as Nonbinary

A/N: If you don’t like it, just don’t read it, thx, there’s no reason for anyone to hate on things they don’t like/agree with, so just go about your day, title says it all so don’t pretend I didn’t tell you what this is. Follow my blog for more content like this and have a wonderful day. Sorry if some of these are really similar, I wanted to point out the differences but I didn’t want to make the others too short, especially since my bias is first in the order I always go (fanchant order, for anyone curious before reading it, so no, I didn’t just put my bias first lol), I hope everyone enjoys this!

Kim Namjoon:

Mr. Big Brain here? He’d want to know everything about it, he’d race through the google questions (on google, of course, I think he’d understand how tiring it is to be asked the same question again and again, I mean, the infamous dating question...) then approach you with any personal questions, sit and listen with wide eyes and open ears. “Babe, I want to be an advocate for you, just tell me how you want me to do it. I google’d the basics, here’s what I know, tell me if anything’s wrong.” Starts talking about it more in interviews, using even more gender-neutral terms. Takes to using your pronouns relatively quickly and feels like absolute garbage when he gets it wrong, spends the whole day making it up to you if he fucks up. When someone talks shit about enbies, he’ll launch into a whole speech about why they’re wrong, overwhelms them with his off-the-cuff knowledge of the subject and ability to cite sources, will 100% speak over them if they’re continuing to say some dumb shit, especially if they cite “god”, and will talk about ancient cultures with more than 2 genders just to point out that it’s far from a new concept. Will physically protect you if necessary, he may not be a violent person but he’s built like a protector.

Kim Seokjin:

“So... You’re not breaking up with me, right? I mean, obviously there are more important things than that but... No matter what gender you are, you can’t resist my handsome face, right?” Pouts and jokes and pulls you into a tight hug before seriously telling you that he doesn’t care what gender you are, he loves and respects you. A bit more hands-off than Namjoon, will let you educate him and will google things if it seems important but to him, you’re just a person, and a person he loves very much. All he cares about in terms of your gender is how that affects your relationship, so of course he’d work hard to get your name and pronouns and such right, and he’d learn how to comfort you through dysphoria, and how to properly correct people (by watching you, of course, or if you’re too shy, he’ll ask why you didn’t correct them then take initiative and figure out how to correct them himself). When someone’s talking shit about enbies, he’ll be more the type to ask them why they think whatever their reason is comes before people’s happiness and mental health. Doesn’t understand why people are so damn rude. Will usually just take you out of confrontational/unsafe environments/situations but will fight if he has to. Will definitely make computer-based puns, but only if you don’t find them offensive.

Min Yoongi:

“Ok, just tell me what to call you and how to talk about you.” Quietly there for you. In secret googles all the questions he knows are more general. Will glare down anyone who talks shit about you until they’re intimidated into shutting the fuck up. Will cover your ears and quietly give a very detailed and disturbing description of gender dysphoria he found online once they’re silent, take your hand, and walk away. Quiet in his advocacy for you but won’t ever, ever back down unless you tell him to. 100% will get in someone’s face if necessary, will physically protect you in spite of his shorter stature. Won’t take any shit from anyone about it and will cut people off if they treat you poorly, especially because of your gender.

Jung Hoseok:

Another silly boy, but unlike Jin, his first words will be, “You know... I love you. Your personality. Who you are as a person. Not as a [boy/girl], as you.” Then he’ll start making jokes and talking about getting new couple’s clothes, mugs, etc. I could see him messing up a little more than most of the other members, but he’ll always catch himself and apologize. He gets a little carried away sometimes and I think he knows that. Will be very careful when he’s not being playful, and will triple down on being careful when he’s talking to the public, if you’re out about your relationship and want to be out as nonbinary. Won’t misgender you even if you don’t want to be out as nonbinary, but he will find ways to do that without outing you. Will google things as they come up, and will talk to you about it. Will confront hateful bigots calmly, but if they say anything about you specifically, he’ll lose his shit and go off on them, probably scare the shit out of them, too, since he’s usually such a happy-go-lucky guy. Will go out of his way to make you smile when you tell him and whenever you run into bigots.

Park Jimin:

At first, he’ll think you’re going to break up with him, and he’ll freak out a little, tell you that he doesn’t care what gender you are because he loves you and he hopes he didn’t do anything wrong. Will calm down once you reassure him you don’t want to break up, you just want him to know. He’ll be so relieved, and he’ll remind you that he really does love you with all his heart and soul. Will insist on learning as much as he can so he doesn’t mess up. Kind of a big ball of anxiety for a while because he really doesn’t want to fuck up and lose you. Will passionately tell bigots to go fuck themselves (maybe not in those exact words but well...) and whisk you away from them as quickly as possible. Probably won’t refer to you using any pronouns until he’s sure, will always slow down as he begins talking about you, wording sentences in his head and checking them over against his internal list of things not to call you before he says them out loud, still double-checking before they come out of his mouth. Very protective of you, doesn’t want to tell the world about your relationship even more once you come out to him because he wants to protect you from all the haters in the world and he knows he can’t. Needs lots of reassurance that you’re ok and that you know what you’re getting yourself into, and that you can just block the haters.

Kim Taehyung:

“Woah! That’s cool! Does this mean I get to take you shopping for a whole new wardrobe? We should get you some really cool new clothes! We should, we should go shopping and get you a bunch of new clothes!” Will kind of just roll with it, doesn’t understand why it’s that big of a deal but he’ll respect you through and through. When confronted with bigots, he’ll look at them with that sad/confused puppy face and ask why they can’t just accept you. Wants to show the world how brave and strong you are, but only with your permission. As much as he doesn’t see why it’s a big deal, he does see that it is a big deal and that people are cruel about it, so he’s thrilled you trusted him with it and is so, so proud of you just for existing and being strong. Wishes he could protect you but sees that you’re strong enough to protect yourself and him, and will cheer you on if you ever have to. Prefers to take you away from hostile environments.

Jeon Jungkook:

“I should take new pictures of you. Showing off the real you. We can use a nonbinary pride flag in them. That would be pretty cool, wouldn’t it? Why wouldn’t I still love you? You’re my muse, my model, my love. Your gender doesn’t change that. You’re still you, after all. It’s your personality I love.” Mature Kook hours right here, as much of a silly baby boy as he can be, he understands the gravity of the moment. As the youngest, he probably has more understanding from the start, but he’ll do more research to make sure he didn’t miss anything. Will roll his eyes at bigots before commenting to you, “It’s so funny how people can ignore other people’s feelings like that. Come on, jagiya, let’s go be around people who respect others.” 100% doesn’t waste time on bigots. Not afraid to act as your bodyguard or to let his bodyguard(s) do the dirty work if someone tries to hurt you. Loves exploring your identity with you.

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mykidsgay · 6 years

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Defining: Deadnaming

By Mahdia Lynn

Welcome to another installment of our “Defining” series, where we unpack various terms and identities. Do you have a word that needs defining? Let us know!

Define It:

“Deadnaming” is the act of referring to a person using the name they were given at birth instead of the name they have chosen for themselves. Deadnaming is hurtful, traumatic, and even dangerous for transgender people to experience, and we should always refer to people using the name they identify with.

Explain It:

Names are complicated. Our names are definitive pieces of who we are and how we are perceived in the world. They’re also extremely gendered in our society, which leads to problems for people who don’t fit society’s gendered expectations.

We’re not born with a gender. We come into the world as amorphous, genderless blobs, with no real way of expressing gender until we’re a lot older. It’s families, culture, and society that project gender upon us. We are not born with a gender; we are assigned one.

Naming is often a reflection of that gender assignment. If you are assigned “male” at birth, there is a long list of male names to choose from, along with a trunk of “boy” toys and “boy” clothes and a million little gendered expectations to boot. From the moment we’re born, gender is thrust upon us—whether we want it or not.

The name that we are given at birth is also aspirational. Our parents imagine a future for us, and choose a name based on who they expect us to be. As it turns out, sometimes the name you gave that genderless blob 16 years ago doesn’t quite suit the person that blob grew up to be. Often the name we were given at birth is a giant billboard pointing to that (incorrect) gender assignment. When we realize we’re not the gender we were assigned at birth, our name becomes a representation of everything that went wrong with our incorrectly-gendered lives.

As a transgender person, choosing a new name is a deeply personal and important process. When our given name is a stark reminder that we are not who we were expected to be, we are blessed with an opportunity to correct that mistake and choose a name based on who we are today.

When a person comes out as transgender, parents and families go through a transition of their own. Part of this transition as a parent is a rearranging of roles and expectations; not only is there a shift in how you perceive your child, but also a shift in how you perceive yourself. This transition takes time, introspection, empathy, and love. Respecting your child’s agency in determining their gender is a critical part of parenting a trans kid, and the expression of that respect is respecting your child’s chosen name and pronouns. Deadnaming, however, is a refusal of that agency; a denial of your child’s self-determination. It’s a way of telling your trans kid, “I know who you really are, and it’s not what you say”.

Debunk It:

• It’s not a trans person’s “real name.”

There are a lot of ways to refer to the name a trans person was given at birth—”real” is not one of them. I usually refer to it as my “dead name” or “given name.” One friend calls it her “birth name.”

• Using the wrong name is harmless.

Getting deadnamed sucks. It’s jarring and uncomfortable. It violates trust. A person’s dead name can be a trigger word unearthing the gendered trauma many trans people live with. But deadnaming can also be wielded as a weapon against trans people.

Here’s a story: for most of my professional career, I have worked as a chef. It’s a hard profession for women to be in, let alone transgender women, but I’m good at what I do and I can pass for cisgender so I made a pretty good living running kitchens. When I moved to a new town I found a job at a kitchen that was a great match for my career. It was small, independent, and amenable to my management style. My first week at work I worked hard and proved myself in the kitchen to garner at least enough respect to run the place—until one day a coworker I had confided in got angry and loudly called me by my dead name in the middle of the kitchen. That’s all it takes to get the rumor mill going. I was quickly outed as transgender to the entire staff, then all of a sudden people “mistakenly” began misgendering and deadnaming me at every turn. Overnight, my new dream job had become so hostile I had to leave for my own safety. Using just one word in the wrong company, a person wielded my dead name with enough power to take away my livelihood.

Deadnaming a trans person has consequences. It can be weaponized like in the story above but even if it’s an accident with the best of intentions, deadnaming a person in public is putting that person at risk. If you want to support and protect the trans people in your life, it is imperative that you always refer to them with the correct name and pronouns.

• “I’ve always called you X, I’ll never get used to Y.”

As I was writing this piece I decided to reach out to my parents for their thoughts. I came out as transgender a little over ten years ago and it’s been maybe seven of those years since I’ve been deadnamed by one of my parents. Here’s what Mom said:

“It takes time, and it takes practice and effort. It doesn’t come easy at first, but in time it just becomes second nature, as natural as the name I called you before.”

Don’t be too hard on yourself for getting it wrong at first—it’s a transition for everyone—but don’t give up just because it feels weird at first. Apologize if you mess up and commit to doing better next time. Just give it time, effort, and practice.

Be sure to check out the rest of The Defining Series right here!

***

Click here to read about our brilliant contributors!

#my kid is gay #my kid is trans #deadnaming #trans #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #advice #parents #parenting

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adventures-in-transmania · 5 years

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Let’s talk bathroom usage. I’m not sure if I’ve already addressed this on this blog, but we’re going to go more in depth with it.

My current battle of the year has been bathroom usage. I don’t like using public gendered restrooms and haven’t since I came out as trans. I passed as a woman for quite some time, so I sucked it up and used the women’s restroom. It was so ingrained that even single-stall restrooms that were gendered, I’d use the women’s room. I don’t know where I picked that up, seeing as I’ve had cis women tell me that they’d use the men’s single stall restrooms if the women’s were in use. I never would have dreamed.

Flash forward to the night I spent in the library with a group of my friends. I got up the courage to use the men’s room because it was just us in the library at 4am in the morning. They were single stall restrooms, which helped, and opened hella doors to me.

I think the locker room incident was in the same year, or within a year, which kicked me so far back. If my friends couldn’t accept my presence in a male space, how were strangers supposed to? This was especially key when I didn’t pass at all. A single moment conditioned me that I wasn’t welcome in male spaces, that I didn’t pass as male, that I wasn’t seen as male, that I never would be seen as male. It colored my vision. I could never use men’s restrooms without men knowing I was an ‘intruder.’ I’m not an intruder.

I came out at my first job, at my previous job, and at my current job. My first job, I wasn’t taken seriously. My second job, I had changed my name legally, so people seemed to take me seriously (other than the fact that I didn’t choose an obviously ‘male’ name, as a supervisor had commented). The women tried to use the right pronouns (they messed up, understandable, I guess given that I didn’t pass as male, but they still corrected themselves. I often got ‘the apology,’ which was fine at the time. I appreciated the effort. I still appreciate the effort, but I don’t need the repeated apology speech). The men didn’t even try and I had one male who had issues regarding LGBT+ issues that I excused way more than I would anyone else because he had a shitty family situation, which I could relate to, somewhat.

Anyway, context, I had a boss who would ask questions, who I’d talk to about stuff regarding trans things. She was nice and understanding. She’d ask ignorant questions such as if I planned to get ‘the surgery.’ I tried to explain that that wasn’t the best way to ask, that many trans people don’t appreciate that question, but explained why I would love top surgery, but didn’t exactly plan on getting any ‘bottom’ surgery in my lifetime. It was a cute sort of ignorant rather than malicious. She didn’t mean it and she learned from it. Maybe about a few months before I left that job, she offered to put a lock on the men’s room, a small restroom, but not single stall, so I would be able to use the restroom of my gender. I never gave her an answer because things were getting so I didn’t even want to stay and I rarely used the restroom anyway. I don’t think I ever told her, but I appreciated the thought so fucking much. There’s not many who would have thought to ask or even thought of that solution or even just fucking thought of ‘it’ to begin with. I loved working with her and I miss her a lot. She mentioned that she’d had sensitivity training, which isn’t exactly a common thing here it seems, and honestly, that made such a fucking impact on me.

My current job, unfortunately, that wouldn’t be possible. We take inventory, so we go into different buildings daily. Everything changes. We’re there for maybe 8 hours at the most and then we’re gone for six months. I can’t ask them to make special accommodations for an 8 hour period for once every year or six months. So I just didn’t use the restroom and if (IFFFFFF) I had to, I’d quickly use the women’s restroom and hope like hell no one saw me. I think it was maybe five times in the first seven months???

Then I started hormones a couple months into this new job. Things started changing. My voice started changing. I started passing much better. I got male pronouns more than half the time from strangers. However, it still posed an issue given that my aunt who works at the same company, who helped me get the job, refers to me as ‘she/her.’ I was introduced to everyone as ‘she/her.’ Only after some time and some explanation to people who actually cared to listen was I accepted somewhat as male. I still get people misgendering me (I work with a lot of older cis gentlemen who have an issue with gendering me correctly, but we’re getting there, I guess. It’s a long process). I’m trying to get better about correcting people and people tend to refer to me as my ‘Riley’ or ‘they/them,’ which I will take over ‘she/her.’ It got so bad I was starting to associate ‘Riley’ with ‘she/her’ pronouns, but it’s getting better.

Anyway, it took some time. Probably 5-6 months in, I finally talked to a supervisor about my issues with using public restrooms. He actually talked to me about it, offered solutions where he could, and even offered (and did) talk to our manager about it. I was prepared to do it myself, even asked him to make time to talk to me about it, but apparently this supervisor took it upon himself to talk to our manager about it, which I was grateful (and super fucking surprised) for. There aren’t many cis men who would take the time and awkwardness to talk to an older man (our manager) about another person’s right to use which restroom. I was also super surprised to hear this manager, who’s clearly never had to deal with another trans person, say it shouldn’t be a big deal. I had already gone through the list several times:

“I’m a man, I should be able to use the men’s restroom. I pass more than half the time as a man. Our state legislation states that in public restrooms, I am able to use the restroom that I self-identify as. As long as there’s a stall, it shouldn’t matter. I would like to not use the women’s room because it makes me dysphoric. I should have access to a restroom for a variety of reasons, whether I need to get something to blow my nose with, or need a moment to myself, or need to fix my packer in private (something I REALLY, REALLY didn’t wish to bring up, js), or to simply just fucking pee. I’m starting to pass really well, women might have an issue with me in the women’s restroom.”

I went through this list so much in the week leading up to this. All to be let down after I was told ‘yeah, I was already talked to and I don’t think it’ll be an issue..” I was so fucking stressed and defensive. I was relieved, don’t get me wrong, but I also think I should have been part of the conversation. I’m the one it impacts. I still avoid public restrooms at work, not because of the staff of the store, but because of our staff (which always contains at least one male). I don’t feel like looking for the males on our team on the floor just to make sure I can use the restroom, if it isn’t single-stall. I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. I’m already uncomfortable enough for the both of us. I just want to pee (or arrange my goddamned packer because goddamn that thing is inconvenient). The last thing I want to do is see anything I’m not supposed to. Because let me tell you, I may be into men and women, both and neither (yay pansexuality), but I am not in the fucking restroom trying to get off. I just want to take care of what I need to and leave. It does not involve you.

#Personal #Ramblings #Bathroom usage #drunk ramblings

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fishfingersandjellybabies · 7 years

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Less Than - fic

Characters: Damian Wayne, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Cassandra Cain, Bruce Wayne Summary: Jason didn’t mean to find Damian in the middle of a breakdown. He also doesn’t know why he was surprised to find that it was Tim’s fault. A/N: I recently read the Night of the Monster Men crossover, and it annoyed me how much everyone talked about Tim being dead. Like, I get this is right after it happened, but...it just seemed excessive. And I began to ponder how it would affect the boys who had been dead themselves before. I decided it wouldn’t affect them well, for a multitude of reasons. Basically, this is just Damian letting his own grief and insecurities finally get to him. He apologizes at the end because he feels guilty that the family found out and he made them feel bad/worry. He cries because of that and also his grief. Jason finally hands him over to Dick when they get home, and Dick holds him like a lil baby the rest of the night. Damian probably falls asleep in his arms let’s be real. This is basically just word jumble.

He found him lying on a skyscraper rooftop. On the middle of a helipad. Cape spread out beneath him, arms flung out, legs spread.

He didn’t have his mask on. That laid next to his head. His communicator laid next to that.

And Jason didn’t say anything. He wasn’t looking for the kid, and as far as he knew he wasn’t off the family’s radar either, but – he just had a feeling.

So he just took off his helmet and walked across the roof. Laid down by Damian’s head, so his own head was next to his little brother’s, and mimicked his pose.

The sky was clear tonight. And the stars were beautiful.

“…Do you think Father cares?” Damian asked, after only a few moments of silence. “Do you think any of them care?”

“About?”

“The fact that I died.” Damian whispered. “The fact that you died.”

And it looked like his feeling was correct.

“All they talk about is Drake.” Damian continued sorrowfully. “How Drake isn’t here, how they have to live up to Drake’s standard, honor Drake’s memory – Drake, Drake, Drake.”

Damian took a deep breath, let out a deeper exhale.

“Do you think they talked about us like that? Or cared about our deaths as much as they do his?” Damian asked. “Do you think they even really knew Drake at all? I mean, at this point I think I knew Drake better. Because he wouldn’t want this. He wouldn’t want to be held up as some kind of martyr. Or cried over. Or whatever.”

“I know they did for you.” Jason was quick to confirm. “I remember what a mess they were over you. Dick about became an alcoholic. Bruce went insane. I…well, I was dead, so I don’t know what they said about me.”

“You’re the only reason Drake was in this family at all. He wanted to live up to the example you set.” Damian whispered. “But…I feel like this is different.”

“Oh?”

“They didn’t use us as ways to get better. Be better.” Damian continued, and Jason could hear him on the edge. He was going to crack. He was going to fall into a pit of emotions, and he was trying so hard not to. “They mourned us, that’s all. They mourned us. They’re still mourning us, and we came back.”

A tense pause.

“…Do you think they even know we came back? Or are we ghosts?” Damian whispered. “Are we still ghosts, Todd?”

Jason’s instinct was to say ‘Yes we are, and that’s all we’re ever going to be now. You’ll spend the rest of your life trying to overcome that. For them, for yourself, for everyone.’ But he didn’t. He waited a moment, thought through his words. Sighed.

“You’re not a ghost to me, Damian.” Jason returned gently. “Am I a ghost to you?”

“No.” Damian said quickly. Almost sounded like he was blubbering, like he was a real ten year old. With feelings and emotions and healthy outlets of how to show them. “I just. I don’t know. I feel like Drake’s death is more important than ours. They’re sadder with him gone than us.”

And Jason had to admit – it was a good thing Damian was still using pronouns like ‘we’ and ‘us.’ Hadn’t slipped into ‘me’ and ‘I.’ That meant he wasn’t internalizing. Wasn’t blaming himself and hating himself and distancing himself.

At least – not yet.

“They don’t love us as much as they love Drake.” Damian surmised. “I’m sure of it.”

“I’m not.” Jason tried. “Remember – we stole tech, kidnapped Cyborg and jumped to an alien planet for you. That’s no small feat. Dick tried to kill the Joker for me, and you beat him with a crowbar. Have they done any of those things for Tim?”

“…No.” Damian admitted. “But-”

“Grief does different things to people.” Jason sighed, barely believing the old adage himself. “And Tim was a weirdo, so. They loved him differently than us. Not more, or less, but…differently.” He stopped as something came to mind. “And…he was always there, through every tragedy they – or even we – went through. He popped up in Bruce’s life when I was dead. Was there when Bruce died, and even you, and was there when Dick pretended to be. Even for you, and don’t think I didn’t see you two reading encyclopedias together in the manor library during Dick’s spy phase.”

“They weren’t encyclopedias, they were collections. He found a volume of Arthur Conan Doyle’s vampire stories.” Damian corrected.

“…But now, suddenly he’s the one gone, and no one has a backbone to hold them up emotionally anymore. Not even you, apparently.” Jason waved his arm in the air. “Because, Damian, you realize you’re way too young to be having an existential crisis, right?”

Damian hummed defiantly. Then: “…Maybe they’d be happier if I were able to take Drake’s place.”

There it was.

“I mean, if you all found me, then I can find him.” Damian continued, even as Jason sat up. Began to turn himself around to face Damian. Damian didn’t move. “Surely I can make a deal with a deity, or find magic to switch our souls, or, you know-”

“Nope.” Jason cut off. “Stop right there, squirt.”

Damian paused, then tilted his head back, looking up at Jason. “I just mean-”

“I don’t care what you mean.” Suddenly Jason lashed out, reaching under Damian’s arms and dragging the boy towards him. Damian let out a noise of surprise, blinked, and instantly found him cocooned in Jason’s arms. Trapped in a circle of his legs and underneath his chin. Being held tightly, safely. “You’re going to stop talking like that right now.”

“…Todd?” Damian whispered.

“You matter, okay? You matter as much as Tim did. Does. Don’t ever think otherwise.” Jason began to ramble. He found himself suddenly rocking slightly, but didn’t have the heart to try and stop. “And even if you think – wrongly – that the others don’t feel that, know that I do, okay?”

Damian just slumped against him.

“I…” And it was still impossible to say a simple thing like ‘I love you,’ even to this child, the one who probably needed to hear it the most. “I’m glad you’re here. I’m glad you’re still here. I’m glad you came back. I think about it every day.”

He didn’t realize how he emotional he was getting, until he felt Damian reach up and wipe a stray tear away.

“Tim…isn’t more important than you. Just like Dick isn’t more important than the rest of us, no matter how much we still sometimes think it.” Jason whispered, shifting if only to hold Damian tighter. “And I know I’m not the brother to get all…sentimental about the rest of you, but. Just. Just don’t talk like that, okay? Please, just don’t talk like that.”

“Todd…”

“If not just because you trading yourself for Tim would still leave this family missing pieces and broken,” Jason cut off. “But because if you let yourself think those kinds of things, then you’re letting that darkness win.”

He sniffed, shifted back so he could look into Damian’s eyes, and carefully lifted his hand to hold his face.

“You know that darkness I’m talking about, right? That darkness that sticks around after you come back to life.” Damian nodded silently. “You’re better than that shit, man. I know you are.”

“So are you.” Damian added quickly, before Jason could continue. “You’re better than that too, despite your attempts to act otherwise.”

Jason smiled, leaning his forehead against Damian’s. “…You feeling better, kid?”

Damian paused, but then shrugged. That was good of an affirmative as he was going to get for now, Jason knew.

“…Next time you start feeling like this, don’t come hide on a rooftop.” Jason whispered. “I want you to call me instead, okay?”

Because Jason didn’t want to think about what stupid thing Damian might’ve done if Jason hadn’t come across him. And he didn’t want to think about what stupid plan his little brother might think up the next time he got in this funk too.

“Promise me you’ll call me.” Jason ordered, even as Damian stared up at him with big doe eyes. “Like, blood oath kind of promise.”

Damian quirked his lips, but slowly nodded.

“Good boy.” Jason hummed, pulling Damian back against his chest. “And if you break that promise, I swear to you I will kick your puny little ass.”

Damian scoffed, but curled into Jason’s embrace all the same.

“…You matter.” Jason reiterated. “You’re more than your death. We are more than our death.”

“And we love you.” Jason and Damian both jumped. Found Bruce, Dick and Cassandra all standing on the ledge. It was Dick who had spoken, and before Jason could ask, Dick pointed to his own ear. “More than basically anything.”

…That’s right. Jason had never taken out or turned off his own communicator. Which means this whole conversation happened on an open channel, for the whole family to hear.

Oops.

Surprisingly, though, it was Bruce moving first, hopping off the ledge and gliding towards them like a man on a mission.

“I wish you’d told us that this is how you felt, Damian.” Dick continued, as he and Cassandra slowly followed Batman. Batman, who was dropping down next to them, and gathering both sons up into his arms. Damian didn’t react, even as Dick and Cassandra crouched around them too, Cassandra taking Jason’s hand in hers, and Dick carefully rubbing Damian’s curved spine. “I wish you would have let us help you.”

Damian shrugged. Hid his face against Jason’s throat.

“You’re not a ghost.” Dick whispered. “Neither of you are. And all of us…thank our lucky stars for that every single day.”

“You’re here. With me.” Bruce mumbled, and Jason glanced at him. Watched as Batman carefully ran his hand over the back of Damian’s head. “And I’m going to make sure you stay here with me, for as long as I can.”

“Tim’s death doesn’t mean any more or less than either of yours.” Dick added. “And it…breaks my heart that you thought that, for even a second.”

“I’m sorry.” Damian murmured. Cassandra silently shook her head.

“No, Damian, it’s not. You don’t have to-” Dick tried, but couldn’t find the words, so he sighed. “Don’t apologize, Damian. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“It is valid.” Cassandra tried. “These feelings.”

“Completely.” Dick agreed. And when he said it, he glanced knowingly up at Jason too, who smiled sadly.

“I love you.” Bruce said simply, holding Damian and Jason tighter. “I love you all more than anything in the universe.”

And this time, when Damian spoke, there were tears in his voice. Jason could feel them on his neck. “I’m sorry.”

Dick kept rubbing Damian’s back. “…How about we call it a night and head home.”

Bruce nodded, and Dick held out his hands for Damian, the fact that he would not be walking on his own, able or not, unspoken between all of them.

“No, I-” Jason shifted his arms around Damian. Damian, in turn, let him, wrapping his arms around Jason’s neck in return. “Lead the way, ‘Wing. I’ve got him.”

Dick smiled and ruffled his hair, before leaning down and leaving a kiss to Damian’s temple. Reluctantly, it seemed, Bruce let his sons go, standing as Dick and Cassandra did.

“Take them to the manor, Dick.” Bruce hummed. “Cassandra and I will finish the patrol, and follow behind shortly.”

“An hour or less, or I’m coming back out here after the both of you.” Dick scolded, even as he began, almost ridiculously, to tuck Jason under his arm. Jason didn’t react to the gesture, just kept his focus on Damian. Cassandra gave a thumbs up, staring pointedly up at Bruce, who nodded eagerly. “Good. See you soon.”

He didn’t watch Batman and Black Bat race back into the city. Just kept his arm around Jason as he spun him and Damian around, and headed for home.

#Damian Wayne #Jason Todd #dick grayson #cassandra cain #bruce wayne

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fivewrites · 7 years

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5557 Reviews Your Fanfic #3: Soul of a New Machine by StygianLotus

Hello, friends, I am 5557 on Ao3 and I review your fanfiction if you want me to.

Soul of a New Machine by @stygianlotus

Summary:

Lance had been living the same cycle of events over and over since he got captured by the Galra. After seven months with Haggar, the other Paladins finally manage to save him. However, they soon realize that Lance's wounds run much deeper than they had hoped.

Rating: M

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence

Tags: Psychological Torture, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Psychological Trauma, Torture, Aftermath of Torture, Coran helps Lance, Langst, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Angst, Post-Defeat of Zarkon, Post Season 2, Flashbacks, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, poor lance

Optional info:

Is English your first language? Yes How long have you been writing for? 4 years Are you 18+? No Do you want publish / write professionally one day? Maybe

Technical Style / Formatting: Paragraphs are of a good size.

Quotes and dialogue are all correct, punctuation is used correctly.

I find parenthesis to be unnecessary in fiction, but they are still used correctly.

Could use a bit of dialogue attribution switch-ups (Lance said vs. said Lance) here and there, but that’s a very small thing.

The second chapter’s flashback doesn’t need to be entirely in italics, but it’s ok.

Pace: The pace is affected by the problem of the mixed-omniscient narrator.

The biggest core problem in the story, and one that is at the root of all others like the confusing sentence structure is: Who is our narrator and what does our narrator know?

In some paragraphs, is seems like we have an unreliable, deep-pov narrator that keeps us well inside of Lance’s head. In other paragraphs, the narrator informs us in a more omniscient way of information that Lance himself does not know. And inconsistence narrator can lead to plot and characterization problems, as well and issues with general prose flow and how the story progresses.

We need to establish solidly who the narrator is (is it a detached voice of lance, or an outside figure?) and what exactly they know. Do they know A) everything about everyone, all the time? (omniscient) B) Everything about lance and only Lance (Limited omniscient) or C) Some things about Lance, but not everything (Unreliable non-omniscient)

Establishing this will help with the confusing sentence structure and set the pace and tone of the story so the reader can understand what’s going on (even with limited information) and progress.

Dialogue: The dialogue is fairly good, and I appreciate the fact that the team care about Lance and want him to feel safe and welcome back on the team.

Once we solve the narration problem, the dialogue will fit the story that much better.

Characterization: So far, characterization isn’t too much of a problem, but with huge, personality-changing events such as capture and torture, it’s really important to research trauma and how is can affect a person. It’s up to you to decide how lance’s behaviour deals with his trauma, whether he chooses to smile through it and pretend nothing is wrong, or like in your story actually show that he has been deeply affected.

It’s not wrong for Lance’s personality to change from an extreme situation. I think it would be wrong to write him as the exact same person he was before his capture, but I also want to stress that he is not 100% a new person. There are and will always be fragments of the old person there, and they will have good days where they are able to laugh and joke and have a good time. It’s about finding the balance of depth.

For research, I would really recommend watching the movie Room (2016) about the 5-year-old child who grew up in captivity with his mother. This movie does an amazing job of showing that even in a dire situation, they are able to be sane and smart. It also shows that they are not immune to breaking down and falling apart. Both are true, and that is what makes the story so powerful.

Flow / Prose Style:

Try to find and remove extraneous filler words like was and had. As well, look for text written in the passive voice, and try to edit it to become more active.

“The cup was picked up by Lance.” - Passive “Lance picked up the cup.” - Active

I think I understand what you’re going for in the beginning, so I’m going to make a few assumptions.

The opening fades in like a person coming into consciousness after being knocked out- blurry, unclear, unable to pin facts and details and people. This is an appropriate way to open a thriller / angst story, no problems there.

My advice for a choice like this is that as an author you need to be very careful and specific about what you make clear and what you make hazy.

Too clear, and you don’t get the desired effect.

Too hazy and your readers are confused and bored because they can’t understand enough

So when you’re doing a style like this, be very careful about who knows what, and who is being mentioned. If you turn too many names into epithets or pronouns (he or she) we very easily lose track of what the narrator is referring to.

“He remembered Allura ordering for them to attack him, remembered Hunk being the one to do it while Lance was still restrained.”

This sentences contains two “he’s” and the second one is unclear as to who it’s referring to. We could use clarity by saying “Lance remembered Allura ordering for them to attack him, remembered Hunk being the one to do it while he was still restrained.”

“How could they still act like they were best friends after everything that had happened?”

And here, it’s slightly unclear as to who the “they” is referring to. Lance and Hunk? Lance and the rest of the paladins? Hunk and the rest of the paladins? etc.

For someone who is english as first language, some of the phrasing is… odd. It’s not exactly passive voice, nor is it grammatically incorrect, but it attributes action and intention to the wrong symbol of importance.

Like PutTING the emPHAsis on the wrong sylLAble. It’s not incorrect, but it it is jarring.

““Hey, Lance?” The sudden voice jerked Lance out of his thoughts, looking up quickly like he had gotten used to doing.”

The second part of the sentence says that it’s the voice, not lance, that looked up quickly.

“Keith’s face made Lance take an involuntary step back, watching him cautiously.”

This is also odd phrasing that leads to odd mental image. It’s like Keith is pressing Lance around physically… with his face. Keith’s face doesn’t really make anyone do anything unless he’s physically using it. The way it’s described currently gives keith’s face, and not keith himself the agency and importance.

At the very end of the sentence, it’s unclear whether it’s Keith’s face or Lance that is doing the watching cautiously.

I get the idea of the scene, but the phrases used to describe the action are odd. So when the common thread of concern is confusing sentence structure, it’s often a good time to go back to the basics and start from the bottom. try to rewrite sentences three times and pick the best one you like. this can also help stimulate new ideas and new ways of phrasing.

Parenthesis tend to be aside thoughts. Find a way to integrate them into their own sentence or paragraph. Also, things said in parenthesis tend to come across as comedic, so it helps the tone of the serious story to try to minimize them.

The same goes for but / although additions to sentences. Decide if they deserve their own new sentence or paragraph or if that information really needs to be told to the reader at all.

Beware when using epithets. “The blue paladin” sounds cold and unsympathetic. If you want readers to attach themselves, use names.

Story:

There’s a lack of impact in the initial chapter because we are told snippets of Lance’s experiences, but rather than holding it as a mystery, or exploring it in more depth, these things come across like an informative list rather than a story.

Each event and experience that lance has faced, while impactful on its own, loses impact when strung together with the other pieces that come across as list-like.

There are two options of exploring lance’s experiences, and this will come down to how you choose to narrate the story, and it’s this: Do you want Lance to be the POV character or not?

If you make lance the poc character, you can explore all of his thoughts and memories of the events of his capture. It would be an internal tale, and explore him learning to communicate with his team once again.

Or, you could make Keith the POV character, and write more of a “medical mystery / crime procedural” type story, where the team slowly learns of the events that happened to Lance and how deep they go. (this does not have to be a klance fic or romantic at all if you choose to make keith the POV. He’s just the narrator who cares about his friend)

The flaws in the first couple of chapters are a little counterintuitive. The story seems a bit rushed, and one would assume that it’s under explained. I think the opposite is true. It’s over explained, trying to catch us up as quickly as possible to everything that has happened to Lance.

What would make the story more interesting would be to let each event breathe a bit, and explore more of Lance’s sensory reactions and his dialogue with his team than simply stating what happened to him and what went wrong. Show us Lance’s flightiness and mistrust instead of telling us about his torture.

The first chapter could use a bit more environmental description. Where do they go in the lions? How far? When?

The second chapter where Keith is rescuing Lance is fairly straightforward a good, we just need to decide on a main narrator and stick to them.

“Keith wished that he knew how to help, really – it was frustrating to all of them. They wanted to be able to help, but Lance wouldn’t let them in. He still kept everything inside, as he usually did, they’d learned. Lance was the type to bottle up his emotions because he was worried they’d hold someone back.”

This would be a great opportunity to show us Lance’s mistrust instead of telling us. What are his actions? His reactions? What does he do, specifically?

“Coran wished that he could see what was going on inside of Lance’s head so that he could help him.”

This comes across as odd and weak because we as readers can see inside of lance’s head. We were told lots of things by the story, so there’s no surprise or mystery. We feel smarter than Coran, rather than on his level.

The story really starts to take shape in the third chapter, and I really like that Coran is both a main part of the story and well-characterized. But the POV / narration problems are of prime concern. Once we figure these out, it will start to flow much more smoothly and be much more engaging to read!

#vld #voltron #Voltron legendary defender #writing help #fanfic reviews #voltron reviews #my reviews

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lesserfandomappreciation · 7 years

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sidon x short shy reader comfort scenario where reader feels inferior and sad please and also thank you sm ...

No problem sweetie! And if you ever need to talk about emotions that feel like they’re hard to get through, I’m glad to listen!

As for this ask, I’m going to stick to gender neutral pronouns until you correct me.

-Mod Pinks

Comforting tiny shy s/o who has thoughts of inferiority and sadness (Sidon) (Slight trigger warning at the beginning for negative thoughts of self worth)

Stupid. Disgusting. Dumb. Idiot.

This… this had not been a particularly cheery day. Being His Highness’s partner meant bringing a lot of attention from the citizens of Zora and beyond, something they were still trying to get used to. Usually walking around the city’s beautiful sites and taking in the atmosphere calmed them down but today…

Why them?What was His Highness thinking?They don’t belong.

…The elderly had a lot to say. To each other, obviously, as if they would ever give them the time of day.

Ink met the paper as they continued writing, completing the task at hand. Sidon was a prince who would someday be King, which meant that they needed to be just as responsible as him. Completing reports and performing duties was something they usually didn’t mind doing, since it help their lover so much, but today…

His Majesty won’t appreciate if the papers are marked with water drops, let’s put it that way.

(Name) leaned back against the chair, putting the pen down and staring at their hands in frustration, unable to wipe the tears falling on them. They’d always been shy, it was something they struggled with since they were young. And now, it brought them great sadness as they couldn’t find it in themselves to be angry at those words they had said.

Knock, knock

“(Name), may I speak to you? There’s a dignitary my father is sending me to meet and he- (Name)!” No, no, no! Quickly they turned away, wiping their eyes as quickly as they could. They couldn’t let him see them like this, they couldn’t!

“Please, (Name), what has happened? Are you hurt?” In less than 2 bounds he was before them, kneeling down and cupping their face in his hand. Concern grew as Sidon saw that his beloved tried to swallow down whatever had happened, trying to keep it to themselves. “Darling, I can only help you if you tell me what happened. Please. Let me help.”

His eyes never left theirs, searching for whatever truth there was within them. Damn it. They didn’t deserve his concern, his soft touch, his smile- any part of him at all. Those elders had more truth that they themselves knew.

“Sidon, it’s… please, it’s… it’s nothing, just-”“If it is nothing than why are there tears here? Beloved, please, do not hide from me. I want to help.”“I….” Damn him and his gentle voice, barely even a whisper as he spoke to them. Damn their own cowardice, having to look away from that warm gaze to be able to speak. “I… I don’t deserve you… There’s nothing I’ve done or I could ever do to be good enough for you.”

“What? Who- Have the elders said something? Beloved, you are above them, their words are little more than lies-”

“Are they though?!” Their gaze whipped back to him, his mouth agape as their fury overruled their shyness for the first time in a long time. “There’s not an ounce of a fighter within me, I have no experience being a leader, much less a ruler, not once have I done some great deed nor achieved some grand goal- the only thing I’ve ever done is somehow make you think that I’m good enough and I still don’t know why you think that!” Ragged breathes filled the room, the anger leaving them breathless. “They’re… they’re right. All of it, it’s… it’s true.”

Their head dropped, unable- no, unworthy- of continuing to hold his gaze, before the guilt hit them straight in the gut. No. No. They weren’t supposed to have told him, they were just supposed to keep it to themselves, not let him know how they were effected by it, just like a leader should. Goddess, the rumors were true, every ounce of them.

“(Name), look at me.”“…”“(Name).”

Slowly, that warm hand tilted their head upwards before a pair of warm lips kissed them on the forehead softly. Sidon’s other arm wrapped around them and brought them close to him, hiding them away into the rest of him. For a moment, just a moment, the room was silent save for a couple of broken sobs and nightly noises from outside the window. (Name) gave a small squeal of surprise when they found that their legs no longer where on the ground. Instead, their entire body was inside of his grasp, held within his lap as they sat on the bed, warm in their Prince’s arms. Silence eclipsed them once more.

“Did I ever tell you of my sister and Link?” They looked up at him, unable to see over his chin as he continued. “The elders- everyone loved her. There wasn’t a single Zora who hated her. So when she died, everyone blamed the one who got her into the mess- Link. For a century, they spoke of how it was his fault, that he was the worst, that he was a monster who deserved to suffer. And when he came back, they turned their backs on him, refused to give him the time of day and spoke slander of him.”

“…What happened then?” Finally, Sidon looked down at them, with enough love in his eyes that they could feel themselves melt looking at him.

“He proved them wrong. Beloved, I can promise you that their words are just that. Words. Not based in fact but based in a hatred they nurtured over the years. But while they speak of hatred, I see that everyday you are proving them wrong. And that if anyone doesn’t deserve anyone, it is I who doesn’t deserve you.”“What, have you lost-”“How many other people do you think would willingly gain a hundred new duties and still love me? How many others hear such words and still continue caring for another’s well being?”“I-…..Um…”

“(Name). People do not deserve people. They love them for their all. My heart is yours til the day it beats no longer. And while I cannot force you to see all that you are, I can stay with you and help you prove them all wrong your way- ah, what did I say, I’m sorry, are you well?” New tears were falling down their face, though this time there was no frown to be seen on them. Slowly they pulled away and reach up to kiss him on the chin.

“Thank you.” A smile grew on his face, leaning down to kiss them on the forehead.

“For you, the world.”

#botw #breath of the wild #loz #sidon #prince sidon #scenario #sidon x reader

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letteredcreation · 7 years

Text

Life of a telepathic enby

Short story/drabble, ~1800 words.

I was still learning to control my telepathy, and part of that included learning not to accidentally let my thoughts be heard by everyone around me or just whoever I looked at. Therefore, learning that I did not identify as the gender I had been assigned, the one I had been raised as and the one everyone thought I was, before learning to master my telepathic abilities, made it quite difficult to hide my gender identity. I did not even get to be sure of my own gender before people around me knew I was questioning what it might be. It was particularly inconvenient when it started with thoughts such as "I kind of wish I had a dick", "why would I want to wear dresses all the time?", "But I don’t want to be with the girls or the boys…", and "Wait, does that mean I'm gonna get boobs someday? No, thanks!".

It was also exceptionally awkward when my parents had yet to hear any of my gender-questioning musings and were expecting me to be the perfect little girl and attend a fancy dinner party. And, of course, I was feeling particularly masculine and quite dysphoric (not that I knew that term back then) on this evening. And, of course, I was distracted by this and all the people around me so my control slipped, along with my until-then-quite-secret questions about whether my gender was not what I had always been told it was. As one can imagine, letting a mental inner conversation of "I hope I don't get boobs like her, at least! Not that I'd want any boobs… Who'd want them anyway? So inconvenient and gross! A long pee-pee, however, now that's something I'd be on board with just about now…" be heard by the entire party, was not something my parents were particularly happy about. Especially since my telepathy was not considered "normal" or even possible, and so something only my closest family knew. Luckily, in a way, most people had not been able to see properly if my mouth was moving or not, and had thought I had said it out loud. This was not all good though, as, if we could have explained it with the lack of control of powers, at least then there would have been some understanding. As it were, however, people were shocked. They were shocked someone could have such thoughts (apparently that was not deemed "correct"), and also that someone would say something like that out loud at a dinner party. My parents had similar views.

The result was several years of quickly becoming more in control of my telepathy (at least as far as not involuntarily sharing my own thoughts) as I was told again and again that I was a girl and that there was no other option. I learned to suppress the thoughts, ignore the discomfort, and take refuge in the few times where the discomfort and confusion were at a minimum. After some years, however, I became accustomed to the internet and found more information about who I was. Through the years I had hoped to find any hope my parents might be accepting of my identity, but listening to their thoughts gave me nothing for that. Some other people, though, random strangers in shops and on the bus, I could hear occasionally thinking similar thoughts or thinking of a person who had come out as a different gender than they had thought they were. It was these strangers' thoughts that helped me feel less alone and helped me know what to search online to find what I wanted - what I needed.

In the later years, as I learned to control it better, I was happy for my telepathy, incredibly so actually. It had helped me be sure that my parents would not tolerate my trying to tell them of my questions around gender (however depressing it was to hear) which meant I knew how to act to let them give me more freedom elsewhere, such as online. Behaving how they wanted for all those years meant they were no longer suspicious I might me transgender, and so I was able to research what I needed and find people who felt the same way as me. It gave me the opportunity to find the words to describe myself more correctly, to find a word for my own gender identity, something that was important to me (but is not so for everyone). I was able to find the term Genderfluid, read the description and feel a sense of belonging. I found a community of people who identified similarly.

As I became older, I also realised how much I needed to be able to express who I was, and how in my current home that was not possible. I had been increasingly affected by my life, the constant misgendering, the knowledge that the people around me didn’t understand or even accept me for who I was. So, really, I should have been more careful, should have gone through with my escape plan much sooner, but it was hard, hard to leave behind the only home I had ever known, hard to try a risky plan that could backfire, hard to break the hearts of the only family I had ever had. So I waited. And I waited. I waited until I was close to bursting, until my unaccepting surroundings had taken a too great toll on my mental health, until the all-too-frequent dysphoria had gnawed its way to my bones. And still, I waited. And so, I burst. Being me, I also managed to burst at the worst possible time and place and way.

It was my cousin's wedding. We were sitting in our seats, watching the ceremony. I was, once again, decidedly not identifying as a girl. This time, however, I had been identifying more with a third unknown-yet-definite gender. I had still been feeling quite masculine, though. And I had been sat with the women, as was usual during these occasions. The couple was about to sign the contract, and that was when I let myself pick up on a few nearby thoughts. To be honest, I should not have been expecting anything else, I should have been used to it by then, I should have been in better control of myself, I should have known not to listen to my mother's thoughts. It was a mistake, a slip, an accident. One that finally burst the damn, released the water, started the storm, disrupted the calm.

The first slip was, once again, on my powers. Therefore, I, once again, released a stream of thoughts to the entire room. This time, however, it was not a questioning voice, it was not a confused child's ponderings, it was not innocent. No. This time it was angry, furious, outraged, it was sad, bitter, a mess. It was loud. It was a loud, bitter rant. It was a shout in everyone's minds, so startling and sounding so out-loud that nobody except my parents would think it anything else. Everyone had turned to look at me as I started speaking in their minds. I had no idea how it had happened, when exactly I had snapped and let everyone hear my inner rant. I had reacted to what my mother had thought and somehow let everyone hear it.

I opened my mouth as soon as I realized what was happening, hoping to conceal the true nature of where they had heard the voice. I was, after all, aware of how unknown and unacceptable such powers were in our society, despite the superhero movies. It was too late, though, most people had already looked at me without a moving mouth and heard my voice in their minds at the same time. I ran. As soon as I realised what I was doing, I tripped over the legs of the people sitting in the row beside me and ran out, ran away.

As the soon-to-be-spouses had been about to sign, my mother had thought: "I can't wait 'till my dear daughter will marry her own handsome and appropriate man!", and I had thought (to be heard by everyone): "I'm not your fucking daughter, I'm non-binary, I'm genderfluid, I'm not a girl, or a boy. I don’t understand how people can call themselves my family, say that they love me when they can't even try to accept me for who I actually am. I hear their thoughts, I hear their hopes, I hear and see their reactions to people like me - people just trying to be themselves - and they're not good. Oh, no, my family hates me, really, if they knew who I really am." And then, as I looked up at the last part, I saw all the people staring at me, I saw the shock, the fear, the confusion, and my parents' outrage.

So, I did not get to escape the more peaceful way as I had planned, but as soon as I had come out (in the worst way possible if you remember), I ran away. Unfortunately, I had no way of getting home to get my belongings before leaving. I had my phone, and there the number of the one person I had found that could help me. I had some money that I had managed to steal from my parents and had luckily had in my purse (one of the pros of wearing a feminine outfit I supposed). I had been lucky as I had this person to contact though. And after this, after escaping my abusive home, life got better. I had to learn to live away from home, without my family, but it was so much better when I go to be myself. I was also lucky to have parents that just decided I was not worth it and rather seemed to pretend I had died, or, more likely, had disowned me and made up some half-believable lie about how the guests had seemed to hear my voice in their heads. At least they did not come after me or try to find me, despite my status as a minor.

My contact I had found online took me in, and I got to live there, determined to work for them to make up for it. And, as a result, here I was, using my powers carefully, learning to control not just my powers but my mentality as well. I rarely said anything in anyone else's mind, only sometimes correcting people that used wrong pronouns about me or someone else, or correcting them on something else. I always made sure to make it seem like it was just them correcting themselves, and tried to stay as hidden as possible.

#my writing #trans #short story #drabble #dysphoria #genital mention #genderfluid #letteredcreation #oc #original characters #not fanfic #own world #nonbinary #questioning #queer #lgbtq+

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