#but they r also moments.. where they both feel true belonging and acceptance. like they never have before… and it blows there lil minds… | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

athenadione · 5 months

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i wanna wear his initial (on a chain around my neck)

I know it's super late, but I wanted to share my fic for damirae sauce week. I hope you enjoy! (Rated E for explicit sexual content) Words: 2,059 Read HERE on a03

Raven’s sure that most people would never consider Damian to be a generous person. It doesn’t help that he keeps even the closest of friends at arm’s length. She’s also sure that it doesn’t bother him that most people refer to him as distant and cold. He’s always held his cards close to his chest, and keeps those he cares about most even closer.

And as his favorite (a true honor), Raven knows that Damian is more generous than he’d ever admit. So much so in fact, that Raven isn’t surprised in the slightest when he’s knocking at her door with a quiet excitement in his eyes. All while holding something behind his back with both hands. Refusing to show her until he’s completely inside, away from the prying eyes of their teammates.

“What is it?” Raven asks, taking the elongated velvet box from him carefully.

“Open it and see for yourself habibti,” Damian tells her, affection clear in his voice. Her eyes flit up to him a moment, already feeling the smile growing on her face. Her lithe fingers make quick work of the sheer bow wrapped around it. When she lifts the top she doesn’t hold back her surprise.

“Damian, this is…”

“Adequate?”

“…expensive.”

It’s obviously hand-crafted, probably from some obscure jewelry artist requiring a password to meet at a secret location. (She’s kidding, well mostly). Even so Raven can only begin to imagine how Damian had the time to commission this without her knowing about it.

“Tch, you deserve the best omri. I won’t stand for anything less.”

She touches the outline of the necklace delicately. It’s pure silver, and simple. A dainty chain, ending with an embellished ‘R’ full of tiny emeralds. R for Robin, so she can wear it out in public. My Robin.

“It’s beautiful, put it on for me?” She asks, handing the box to Damian.

“Of course.”

She turns around and walks to her mirror, gathering her hair over her shoulder. When she feels the ghost of his fingers at the base of her neck it sends a shiver down her spine. Then his hands come around her head with the necklace.

“So…you like it?” He asks as he starts to clasp it.

Raven trails down the R with her forefinger, staring at her reflection. The chain settling against her neck is cool to the touch and electrifying. Wearing his initial around her neck feels…thrilling.

She turns back around to face him as he finishes. “I love it,” she says, standing up on tip-toes to kiss him. Her arms wrap around his face and his hands find her waist when she pulls him down to bring his lips to hers. “Thank you habibi,” she murmurs against his lips.

“It’s just as much a present to me,” he admits against her skin as his voice drops an octave, “now everyone will know exactly who you belong to.”

A sizzling heat settles in her lower abdomen as goosebumps rise on her skin where his breath tickles her ear. “All those poor women are in for a world of hurt once they realize Robin is officially off the market.”

“Good,” he says, nibbling the shell of her ear, “they should have known I’d never be interested in any of them anyway. How could anyone ever compare to you?”

Raven’s never been great at accepting compliments, but with Damian she’s learning. Still, it doesn’t stop the light shade of red she feels heating her cheeks as she answers him with another kiss.

The heat of his mouth moving against hers is a slow burn. They take their time exploring one another, delighting in the pathway of their hands on each other as Damian takes the lead—nibbling softly on her bottom lip. She sighs at his ministrations, relaxing further into his hold. Damian starts to play at the zipper on the back of her leotard while leading her backwards towards her bed.

“Is this okay?” he asks her, and Raven nods, helping him slide the straps down her shoulders.

“Yes,” she breathes, “It’s more than okay.”

She leans into his chest, fingers slipping underneath his belt to tease him as his hands skin over her arms. Marveling over the gentle way he cups her face in his hands, and the care he takes to help her undress. Trailing soft kisses down her shoulder, following the path of her leotard as it slides down her legs.

“Tabdū rāʾiʿan, you wear our initial so beautifully,” he whispers with reverence against her calf as he helps her step out of her spandex. Raven sighs at the feels of his 5 o’clock shadow scratching lightly against her leg. It’s not enough friction, she needs more, but she knows better than to rush him. Damian likes to take his time, and she’s learned the hard way what happens when she tries to push him. She nearly shivers at the memory.

That night he had turned her into a wet, sobbing mess. It had ended with her begging for mercy as he had continued to make her come again and again. So many times that she had eventually lost count.

“What are you thinking about?” he asks and looks up at her, and Raven’s breath hitches at the sight of him. Inches away from where she needs him the most, hands tracing delicately over her skin to reach the swell of her hips.

“You of course, and how very talented you are,” she teases, her hands finding themselves playing with the strands of his dark, curly strands of hair.

He hums, “you flatter me,” his hands tighten around her hips and he lifts her up onto the edge of the bed, “but you’re just as talented you know.”

“No argument there,” she laughs at his raised brow before drawing his face back up to hers for another kiss. Letting him push her back until she’s surrounded by pillows, and his frame settles over hers. Close enough that she can feel the warmth of his arms around her face.

“I think you’re overdressed,” she says, her hands gripping the edge of his uniform tucked into his pants.

He stops her with his hand on her wrist, “Not yet, I want to look at you first. I want to watch you come for the first time wearing my necklace.” He fingers the chain between her breasts, before brushing his thumb over one nipple. “All mine,” he says as he teases the bud into a tight peak, “I want them all to know you’re mine.”

Raven moans, chest heaving as he turns his attention to her other nipple—taking it into his mouth. “Y-yes,” she stutters when his tongue swirls around it, “I’m yours beloved.” She pants as he continues, as wetness continues to gather between her thighs. She wants to squirm, press her legs together to relieve the tension that’s building there so quickly, but she knows the pay-off of waiting. So she doesn’t plead with him, just whimpers, when Damian traces a single finger around the hood of her clit, so devastatingly slow.

“So good omri, you’re being so patient,” he grips one of her thighs before hitching it over his shoulder, the act giving him more access to her. “Can you be still for me? I want to taste how sweet you are.”

“Yes, yes, albi, please,” she responds, gasping when he lowers his mouth over her clit. Her back arches off the bed just a little as she struggles to not move. Her hands tangle in the bed sheets as hot pleasure starts to build inside of her. His lips expertly nibble as his tongue darts out, sketching circles around her nub. Then he slips a finger inside of her, and it starts to pump in a rhythm that drives her only higher towards her peak.

Her orgasm catches her by surprise, ripping through her body, and she cries out—her hands reaching to entangle in his hair again as he helps her ride through it. He plants small kisses to both of her inner thighs, murmuring words so low she can’t understand what they are.

There’s a light ringing in her ears and she’s covered in a line sheen of sweat when Damian starts again. Enclosing his mouth around her clit once more. Raven shakes her head against her pillow as her hands shakily reach to pull him up, “Please, no more Damian. I want to feel you inside.”

He glances up, and brings his fingers up to his lips, covered in her essence. “You do taste sweet Raven. So sweet that I want seconds.” His mouth lowers unto her again, “One more, then I’ll give you what you want.”

She’s shaking by the end of her second, gripping his shoulders like a life-line as he pushes her back over the edge. He tells her how beautiful she is, a goddess incarnate, when he considers going for thirds. She begs for him to stop instead, “You promised,” she says, still breathless.

“You’re right, I’m sorry omri. You just taste so good, I couldn’t help myself,” he says as he moves to stand, giving Raven a short reprieve. She watches as he undresses, taken by the way his muscles ripple under the light from the nearest window.

He catches her staring, sending her a light smirk before it melts into something more intimate, “Are you okay? Do you need a break?” he asks.

Raven smiles warmly and shakes her head, “I’m good, just enjoying the view.”

“Likewise,” he quips, moving to settle his length right over her core. He kisses her shoulder as she moves to grip his forearms.

They groan together, breath intermingling, as he moves inside of her. Going slow until he finally bottoms out, and Damian gives Raven a moment to adjust to the feel of him. The delicious way he fills her up. And then he moves again and she throws her head back with a moan as he starts a punishing pace. One that she can’t help but be swept into, can’t help but drown in the tidal wave of their pleasure.

Damian quickly finds the spot that draws out more whimpers from her lips, and he lowers her mouth to swallow her cries. She drinks in his kiss greedily as he builds them both back up to orgasm, his fingers finding her swollen clit, rubbing tight circles that contrasts his more shallow and well-placed thrusts. Then he pushes them both over the edge together with a final stroke, moaning her name into her neck as he spills inside of her.

Her own orgasm is mind-blowing, and Damian continues to thrust languidly, drawing it out as long as he can. He moves the sweaty strands of hair out of her face, curling them behind her ears as he kisses her again. Long and slow and full of devotion. For her. It makes her heart squeeze with emotion.

“I love you,” she says, accepting more kisses at her temple.

“I love you more,” he tells her, rolling onto his back while pulling her on top of him. She listens to his heart beat as it starts to slow, relaxing in the afterglow of their love making. One of her favorite parts.

Damian makes them sit up as he reaches for her mini fridge, pulling out two bottles of water before uncapping one and handing it to her. She accepts it while murmuring her thanks, and takes a few greedy sips, not realizing how thirsty she really was. After a while they settle back against the headboard as Damian uncaps his own bottle.

Raven starts to play with her necklace, admiring the shine of the emeralds as it reflects against the light. “You know I really do love my present, but next time I have a different necklace in mind to wear,” she says with a light smirk.

Damian catches the playful lilt of her voice and looks down at her with a raised brow, “Oh? And what did you have in mind, beloved?” he asks, just before taking a sip of water.

“Your hand.”

Raven laughs as he chokes on his water in shock. The mess on her comforter is completely worth the look on his face. She’ll pay for it later for surprising him like that, but that’s okay.

She’s counting on it.

#damirae #raven #damian wayne #fanfic #damian x raven #damirae sauce week 2023

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demonslayedher · 3 years

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Dream Analysis of Mugen Ressha

Spoilers for the movie, while it does not depart from the plot of the manga, they made adaptational choices which I may refer to within.

While Enmu has control over what kind of dream his victims see, ultimately, he would have no way of knowing all of the details of his victims' lives, so we can assume that he is prompting his victims to fill in a lot of the details themselves. These are the worlds they surround themselves with consciously, but their untouchable unconscious spaces say just as much.

I've said some of this before, but these dream sequences give us so much to say about Inosuke, Zenitsu, Kyojuro, and Tanjiro.

Into the dream: Did that "Rengoku-aniki" thing really happen???? It's animated like a fever dream (or drawn like a typical Gotouge-being-Gotouge panel), but both the movie and the manga leave this inconclusive. It can be interpreted two ways: 1. The two other demons were there all along as decoys, set to appear only when Enmu's blood technique slowly started to take effect so that they'd let their guard down. In this way, we'd know that the boys had a true way of witnessing Kyojuro's prowess and a true bonding moment, thereby making his death hit all the harder later. This would also mean that one of the cars was totally unusable for passengers, and many of the passengers were already thoroughly spooked before falling into sleep. It would also imply that they were all super excited, thoroughly relieved, returned to their seats, and then just passed out.

2. The moment the tickets were clipped, Enmu's very, very, very realistic dreams took immediate effect, but he still needed time before it took effect enough that their guards would go down. If this is the case, then it implies the following: 1. Enmu's illusions can be shared 2. Everyone syncs extremely well together to have all been sucked in by the same illusion (it's possible it was only Tanjiro's, but since we get in everyone's heads a little in this part, I believe they all experienced the same thing). Reacting in ways so true to how they would in waking like, they learned as much about each other as truthfully as they would have if they were fighting while awake. 3. The "Rengoku-aniki" thing is the moment they're falling into a deeper stage of sleep, when any bizarre thing will make sense. They've lost any sense of holding back and are embracing the emotions as they hit them. Even if that was all a dream, the bond formed was very real. But then, as they fall deep, they fall into their own headspaces. Inosuke: I love how bombastic this dream is. It moves at a very fast pace, and everything revolves around Inosuke. He is physically much larger than Ponjiro, Chuuitsu, and Pyonko, who clearly follow him as their leader, the most powerful person in this cave exploring world full of wonder and excitement. True to life, these underlings can at times be frustrating or stupid, but there is no one else Inosuke would rather have at his side to take on a hugely impressive foe. It's a relatively simplistic world, what Inosuke really cares about is his place in it, and who is there.

Taking it a step deeper, he should not be able to manifest in his self-conscious space, but Gotouge attributes his and Zenitsu's ability to do this and protect their cores from intruders to their strong senses of self. What's telling is that his subconscious space is practically identical to his conscious dream space; like there is no breakage between one stage of reality and the next. In its Zen-like simplicity Inosuke's mind is never at odds with itself, its interpretation of reality is fluid and seamless. However, being at this deeper state brings us to a deeper state of self actualization, with Inosuke manifesting closer to the ideal beast he views himself as.

Now, with Inosuke being so fully invested in what he sees as reality, he's still got a carry-over effect from dream after waking up, which one could interpret as not having fully shaken the effects of Enmu's blood technique. After all, Zenitsu simply never broke out of it, Tanjiro had to kill himself in his dreams each time to fully snap out of it, and Kyojuro was the only one powerful enough to have broken through its effects through his own willpower. When Tanjiro says the train is a demon, he buzzes with "I was right!" (a conviction that only got stronger in his dream), and Inosuke's declarations of being the boss and Tanjiro being his underling are indignantly plentiful and he fully believes what he is saying every time he brings it up, even if he's aware that he's no longer in the cave exploring dream. But, given that Inosuke is so at peace with his own version of reality, it's also just as likely that his conviction of being The Boss was also only compounded by the dream, and all that dream did was give him a more fun setting in which to play around in. But, what was so fun about the dream, what made him sleep-giggle with pleasure, was that everyone else was finally getting with the program and recognizing him as the boss, as they should. Finally. It's so frustrating in real life that he has to keep reminding them to get it right. Get it, Santaro?? GOOD. Zenitsu: What I love here is the contrast between subconscious and conscious space. Both of them have the same theme melody, but played in very, very different ways. They also both play with the same core desire in very different ways as well. Is it so much to ask that he can just spend some time alone with the girl he loves?? If we jump straight to the pitch black unconscious space, he specifies to the intruder that only Nezuko is allowed there. Not just girls in general, not a close friend like Tanjiro, only the one girl he loves, and even then, you'd have to love someone a lot to invite them into the deepest, darkest corners of your soul. And it is a very, very, very, very dark corner. Zenitsu's spent most of his life building that dark, pessimistic personality, compounded by the treatment he's always received throughout his life and what he believes about himself at his core. He's ugly and depraved there, and very defensive. Because he holds himself in such darkness, that makes him desire the bright, happy, completely idealistic world of his conscious dream world. It's rich with detail and warm and he knows it well, that places is the first place he ever felt someone have hope for him; it's Jiichan's home, that sunny place with delicious peaches and full of clovers and lush greenery and a charming stream. Of course he'd want to show it all to Nezuko, she deserves to see such a happy, pretty place! And, while the world is idealized and happy, Nezuko is e-x-t-r-e-m-e-l-y cute and actually wants to hang out with him too. She's willing no hold his hand, none of the girls who dated (read: used) Zenitsu in the past were ever willing to hold his hand. He even gets to show her that he can be cool, and she likes it!! She looks him in the eyes and is totally honest about enjoying his company!!

He just wants someone to want him back. He wants to belong in the sunshine too. So, even if he had it in him to wake up from Enmu's blood technique, who can blame him for staying there? (You know, besides Tanjiro, who has been desperately screaming for them all to wake up and help him protect the passengers. Zzzzz, five more minutes, Tanjiro, zzzzzzz----) Kyojuro: This... isn't really a happy dream. Kyojuro has accepted a lot of sad parts of his reality so wholeheartedly that he doesn't seek the comfort of a dream in which his mother is still alive, or a dream in which his father is proud of him. Instead, what Kyojuro was looking for was the chance to go back and say more to Senjuro. This implies that on the real day he knelt in that room, while his father faced away and read the book* while Kyojuro told him all about how he defeated Lower Moon Two and became a Pillar, and was met with his father's heartbreakingly unenthusiastic reply, he later went outside and...

...didn't say any words of comfort to Senjuro.

This regret, that he didn't do more for his brother whom he knew was hurting in his own silent ways this whole time, was what sat most bothersomely in Kyojuro's otherwise peacefully self-assured psyche (or fired-up psyche, if you go by his subconscious space) . It makes sense that in his dying wishes, the first thing he requests is that Tanjiro do this in his stead. *Speaking of that book, Kyojuro had forgotten about it until his memories pulled together to create the details of the dream, which was why he thought to mention it to Tanjiro later. This shows that Enmu is not an architect of people's dreams, he only sets them in motion. How believable they are depends on each victim. (Totally unrelated, I love the design of the Rengoku estate's garden??? It's primarily evergreen and unflowering trees, meaning it stays relatively steadfast throughout the year, a garden designed in samurai villa taste. Plus the details of the house also fit really well, I think??? Would need to review research of buke-yashiki architecture to say more.) Tanjiro: ...*deep breath* This boy really, really wants to go home. Like, the climax of the movie is amazing and all, but it's the scenes with Tanjiro's family that make me cry. Ugh, where do I start. Enmu probably just grabs on to whatever thread of a desire a person has, and then he just tugs on it and says "this way, let's go really far in this direction, show me where it goes, hmm, okay, nice, lovely. Have fun here, I've now seen enough to write my own angsty version for later." So... so I'm just going to work backwards a moment. Enmu screwed up here, thinking he could really read the depth of Tanjiro's family and his feelings for them. He thought he could make a convincing version of these "characters" cry and shove Tanjiro around and speak meanly to him and make him feel shame. And the cut to that dream, OH MY GOSH, truly horrific sound and color change. But Tanjiro's sees through it so fast that he wakes up immediately and uses that anger at how Enmu wrote them to cut off his "head." You screwed up, Enmu, you blew it, maybe other people would very so blown down by the shock that they wouldn't question how unreal that dream sequence is, but Tanjiro has honed his fighting spirit so much that it's been nagging him even throughout his happy dream. And he really, really, really wants to stay in that happy dream. Like, even though he's on guard at the beginning, so much so that he only focuses on the familiar feeling of a demon being around and does not notice the familiar landscape AT ALL. But the moment Hanako and Shigeru step in, convincingly made from Tanjiro's memories and unedited by Enmu, Tanjiro throws that all away in an instant. As he says when he's trying, after trying and trying and trying to rip himself away from the dream, he was never even supposed to had left this world. He was never supposed to had touched anything like a sword, they were all supposed to stay there together, living their simple life. If things hadn't gone wrong that one night. Tanjiro cares deeply about his mission, he's adopted his training deeply, he has serious desire to improve, which is why his subconsciously keeps trying to call himself back to reality, but it's so hard, because this is where he wants to be, and it's even harder because it feels so real. It's a little peeve of mine when families with lots of little siblings are written to be too angelic and idealistic, and there is some of that with the "let's make sembei, yaaaay" scene, but... but that's actually pretty true. I'm giving myself away with how close this hits to home, but it's a dynamic in a lot of large families, especially large families pretty happy to stay to themselves and people who live the same sort of conservative, traditional lifestyle, to foster in the older siblings some pride in taking care of the little ones and helping create that happy world for them, even if taking care of little kids can be rough. It's not to say that things are always happy and fluffy, they're not, and that's not to say even

happy kids don't resent being in a large family sometimes. But there's plenty of moments in daily life, especially in the presence of small children, that you get swept up into a sillier, happy, caretaker side of yourself, and since you all grow up with these silly moments together, you're going to naturally fall into into some silly, scripted-feeling moments of "then I'll be in charge of eating the sembei!" "no faaaaair!". So, I'll give the sembei scene a pass because that IS a moment that happens in years of moments with the same posse of kiddos around you all the time. But it's also so striking to me how each of Tanjiro's siblings, however idealized, has their own personality. The traits are so subtle but consistent and Tanjiro knows all of them. They pick up on things about each other, they grow realistically annoyed and surprised and concerned and scared like they would if they were real instead of only Tanjiro's memories of them. Those kids feel so real to me, even if they are annoyingly overidealized in some parts as Tanjiro is letting himself get swept away. And just when he's managing to part from it to go face reality, Enmu makes more attack: he brings in Nezuko, trying to make it feel like there's no point in Tanjiro running at all. She's fine. There's nothing left for him to fight for. Everything's fine. And all over again, Tanjiro just stops. He KNOWS it's not real, but he's hurting so much to hear her voice again that he just sto-o-o-o-ps. And his desire to stay with the others catches up to him all over again, and he's tempted all over again to stay, EVEN KNOWING IT'S NOT REAL and there are very, very, very pressing matters to attend to. Even if it was all a little happy and idealized, more than anything, it felt like life always did. It's telling that when Tanjiro finally, FINALLY pulls away from that that time, he doesn't look back, and the family stops chasing him. This is Tanjiro accepting reality, however much it hurts. He's already had a couple years to accept this, but it was all overwhelming to get such a vivid taste of it again.

Tanjiro wants to do well to his organization and honor Urokodaki's training and avenge the fallen and prevent anyone else from being hurt and see an end to Kibutsuji Muzan and make Nezuko human again, but more than anything, he wants that simple life. And it's so, so heartwarming that at the end of the manga, he gets it.

It's not the same. It'll never be the same.

He never wanted a life with a sword, but he's been working so hard at it anyway.

#my heart is broken and it's Kamado Tanjiro's fault #KnY Fandom Theories and Meta #Mugen Ressha Hen #Kamado Tanjiro #Kamado Tanjirou #Agatsuma Zenitsu #Hashibira Inosuke #Rengoku Kyoujurou #Rengoku Kyojuro

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dreamii-yume · 3 years

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So, in the event, Rook has shown that he just carries rope with him. You may do whatever you wish with that information 👀

This was an ask from a few...weeks ago? I don’t remember exactly how long this was sitting in my inbox because I was waiting for the perfect time to answer it (//∇//)

Rook had been a very kind and helpful senior to you this year. You’ll be lying if you say that you didn’t think he was a bit strange like the others, but he has that certain charm in him that makes it difficult for you to complete look away from his direction. Besides, it got to the point where you just got used to him and even thought his actions were somehow entertaining...If you were the spectator, rather than the target that is.

Rook is a very doting person as well, you are by no means an exception to this peculiarity of his. He’ll appear when you least expected it, often startling you out of your skin just by a mere greeting alone. He would always talk to you as if he’s reciting a poem ever so often, making you think that you may or may not have completely lost his point here, it’s almost like he’s talking in a different language. He always acts like this towards you, and to everyone else as well, you could never know what he’s thinking or what he wants in the first place. Part of you just thought that he may just have been built differently than others, but then again, Rook is an elusive individual to begin with so everything could all be an act in the first place.

Long store short; you were both fascinated and terrified of this man.

But as strange and conflicting your relationship with Rook is, you still respected the guy as your senior to some extent. Say what you want about the the Pomefiore Vice Dorm Leader but you can’t deny his wide range of capabilities. When you are at a lost for things that you think you can’t do, he was the one who provided you with the advices and help that you needed during those times. Before you knew it, you had already owe him in many ways and yet, Rook had never once asked for anything in return.

“Worry not, mon petite chérie. For I am only doing of what I must.” He would say to you as an excuse, often filling you with guilt sometimes. Especially whenever he would ever so gently pat your head, chuckling to himself as he towers down upon you. “Seeing the beauty in your smile is enough to make my own heart flutter in happiness. Oui, believe me when I say that it’s that marvelous.”

Huh...So, people who accepts things like that as payment still exists in this time and age too. Forgive yourself from being too suspicious of his behavior though, you just don’t think a single smile is worth all that trouble but you guessed this was just another “agree-to-disagree” kind of situation. Who knows? The two of you did grew up in two different upbringings. Or quite literally, two different worlds.

Anyways, although you respected his choices after all this time, you thought it was just common sense to at least provide him with a simple gift in his birthday. You saw how everyone else such as Epel, Vil, and Trey were preparing their own gifts, so you don’t think he’ll be able to reject yours this time. You made your way through the Pomefiore lounge where the party was being held, but was unable to see a single glimpse of your peculiar senior around. It was a lively party and he may be busy with the other dorm residents, so you felt a bit out of place and proceeded to ask people you personally knew about his whereabouts.

“Rook? I was talking to him earlier but now, I have no idea where he went.” Vil said with a sigh as he crossed his arms. “That guy is as elusive as always, even I wouldn’t know exactly what’s running through that mind of his. It puts me in an unsettling position actually.”

“But it’s his birthday for goodness sake, he’s the main protagonist of the day. He should be the one to at least entertain the guest out here, not hiding in plain shadows, seriously.” You laughed nervously as Vil ranted in irritation, huffing by the end. He then glanced at you and soon took notice of the gift you’re holding. “If that gift is for him then, just leave it at his room. It’s unlocked, I believe. We stacked the other gifts he got earlier there too so it wouldn’t clog up the lounge.”

“O-Oh, is that so...Thank you very much.” Thus, ended your conversation with the Dorm Leader with a bow, watching as he walked away saying how Epel had been consuming way too much sugar for the night. With no more leads to follow, you chose to go with Vil’s suggestion and headed out to his room, still at a lost for where your senior could be.

It was true, the moment you spotted the room and turned the doorknob around, it easily spun open. “...Pardon my intrusion...” You slowly said as you took a peak before entering, unsure if anyone was actually inside. There was no one, just some elagant room design as expected with the Pomefiore dorm, with neat furnitures decorated all around. You could feel your own heart cry when you compare to your own dorm which trademark lies within the ghost residents.

You felt slightly anxious, it was your first time visiting his room like this so you couldn’t help but to gawk at some things you’ve never seen before. This was your chance to explore another man’s room, albeit only for a few seconds and by the looks of it, it really hits different that of Ace or Deuce. It has the exact same smell as Rook and the sense of familiarity was somehow calming, probably because you’re so used to being in close proximity with him now. His belongings were all well-organized, the books are neatly stacked on the bookshelves, along with some...questionable collection of bows and arrows stuck on the wall. You also noticed a spare hat and a single telescope lying on his desk, you could ask what it was for, but you preferred to keep the question for yourself.

You shook your head eventually, quickly but carefully prancing inside to place your gift on his desk. Finally, your quest has been conquered, although looking around, the other presents that Vil mentioned was nowhere to be found. Maybe he has them already opened and kept at a certain storage of some sort? Anyways, that wasn’t your problem now, you did what you needed to do, it was your time to bounce out of this room, feeling as if you’re invading too much of his personal privacy. Rook did told you that he never liked that in a person.

...Until, something else caught your eye.

You stopped, eyes blinking repeatedly at the slight tear in the wallpaper near his bed. There was something hidden inside, no, it doesn’t seem like it’s trying to hide at all. It was deliberately placed in a place like that for everyone to see. So, like a cat overwhelmed by curiosity, you stepped close to inspect it, even going as far as stepping on the neatly draped bed sheets of his to get a closer look.

“Eh...?” It was a mass of pictures of almost everything and everyone you can think of upon coming to this school. It was stuck inside the wall like a collection of some sort and it took you a while to actually get what all of this meant. “There’s so many pictures...Pfft...!”

You ended up laughing at yourself for feeling so tense, you honestly felt stupid for the amount of suspense you gave yourself. Of course, this was definitely something that Rook Hunt will do, what did you think it was going to be? Sure, it is creepy to think that someone is keeping tabs at everyone and everything through photography but this is just normal in this school. At least, to those who knew Rook to some extent, it’s not really a big deal nowadays, especially at this school. Anyways, you calmed your laughter down and stared back at the pictures to actually admire them as despite it all, every one of them are all well-taken.

Humming throughout your exploration, you thought it would be interesting to see if you could spot yourself in one of these photos. You looked around and at first, it was tough since you weren’t anywhere in the photos that the wallpaper could reveal but after a while you found a glimpse of your own face at the very edge. However, the tear in the wallpaper stops there so it filled you with disappointment to not be able to see the photo he took of you. “That’s a bummer...” You pouted slightly.

However, combined with overwhelming curiosity, your mischievous side couldn’t help but to come out. You peaked through the small hole inside the wallpaper and confirmed that there is more, as you expected Rook would have, just not visible from your angle. You didn’t want to damage anything but you carefully slipped your fingers in the small opening, trying to get a better look of the picture. You were mainly trying to shine light on them, just a little bit more and you could make out of its content. It got your heart pumping somehow, eager to see what kind of photo you were in.

“Bonjour~”

Screaming almost immediately due to panic and shock, you made the mistake of instinctively gripping his wallpaper tight, dragging them down completely by accident. You turned around, face flushed and clutched your chest as your heart beats so fast that it feels like it could jump out at any moment. “R-Ro-Rook-san!?” You stammered out, your butt hitting the bed while your legs shook. “W-Wha-When...!?”

Rook only gave out a chuckle as you frantically try to calm your nerves, which was nearly impossible after the stunt that he just pulled. You knew he loved doing this and to think you’d be used to it by now, but this one felt so different than the other times you were startled by him. He was so close to you with that greeting, too close in fact. Just where the hell does he keep coming from, you didn’t even hear a single sound from your surroundings. Rook stood straight before glancing over at the mess you had realized you made when his expression turned that of worry.

You were still gripping onto the ruined wallpaper at this point so, you gasped and quickly turned around, preparing for any damage you may have caused. However, at that moment, you stopped once your eyes had finally caught what kind of picture were inside those wallpapers all along.

“Aah...To think mon chére fleur herself would be the one to unravel my collection! How embarrassing~!” Rook said, placing a hand on his slowly heating up his cheeks. He bats an eye to your direction, looking all embarrassed as you stared, unblinking at his work. He soon smirked and chuckled darkly, leaning in closer to you from behind, in which you shivered at. “...But how does it look in your perspective? Aren’t they all beautiful?”

Yes, they were harmless pictures, that’s all there is supposed to be on it. But these pictures striked a nerve in you, one such that you didn’t know could cause this much wave of alarming fear in your body.

They were harmless but they were not normal in the slightest. For almost all of what the wallpaper had revealed was all about you, and only you that it makes you sick to the stomach. Everything that you remember doing in your daily routine had been taken into consideration, from a picture of you yawning as you wake up in the morning, to a picture of you sleeping peacefully at night. Pictures of you seemingly eating, walking, talking, everything that you’ve been doing is pasted on the same wall before you, all taken in such high resolution. If that wasn’t enough, even a few photos of you in the nude was in there, bathing and changing, you unconsciously wrapped your hands around yourself as goosebumps quickly formed.

Rook had literally been watching your every movements, documenting your life with a camera and capturing everything, including things that hits way too close. Deeply disturbed, your eyes tried to glance everywhere but the pictures, only to find no escape to them. Some pictures had even been tampered with before taking the shot, like that one photo where his hands shows his hands deliberately spreading your legs for the camera as you slept. You shivered, unconsciously thinking about that other one where it was your breasts that was fully out for the world to see and oh, god...That one with your sleeping face covered with a suspicious white liquid, you almost gagged at the mental image.

“...W-What is this...” You slowly looked up at Rook with fear in your eyes, trembling like a leaf as the same guy looked down upon you with a chilling smile. It was honestly too nauseating that you instinctively brought a hand to your mouth, just in case something does come out.

“Beauty, my Love.” Rook purred closer to you, his eyes brimming with desire. “Your beauty.”

He caught your chin in a gentle yet tight grip. “I had it preserve in a memory that I would forever see. Just keeping them in my mind alone was not enough.” He said, closing in on you on his bed, preventing any possible escape routes. “...For I am a greedy man.”

And with that, you found yourself in his bind, pinning you down on the bed with your hands on each side of your head. “Now...The reason why you invaded my sanctuary was...?” Rook asked but he was not expecting you to answer at all. Instead, his eyes glanced to the side, eyeing the gift you left on his desk. “...Ah, of course. Vil must’ve given you permission to hand your gift in.”

You were as stiff as a rock, too tense to even act and move. The hands on your wrists doesn’t seem too tight but a feeling in your gut screams at you to not even try if you didn’t want to get hurt. You were left gulping down your own nervousness as Rook turned back to you with the same smile. “Merci. I’ll be sure to treasure whatever you have given me.” He whispered as he leaned closer, giving you a delicate kiss on the temple in which you squeaked at. “...But nonetheless, you trespassed on someone else’s territory, petite proie. A predator’s territory, on top of that.”

“I-I’m sor-“

“Non, an apology is not what I need. Someone as beautiful as you should not make that kind face.” Rook cuts you off, before suggestively licking his lips. He sat up, confident enough to let go of your wrist, knowing fully well that you wouldn’t have the guts to push him off. He straddled above your stomach, which left you confused and wary to wonder what he was planning to do. However, looking back at him, your eyes widened in caution as he suddenly pulled out a long and thick rope, one that would certainly burn your skin if you struggle too much. Where in the hell did he... “Lift your head up high and reap what you have sowed. That is the beauty that can justify your crimes.”

“Now...” You breathe heavily as he tightened his hold on the rope, biting his lip eagerly. You can’t even imagine how much he has planned inside his head. It made you visit the terrifying possibility that he was ready for this moment from the very beginning, curiated and planned. Your heart drops at the thought, if that is really the case, then...Just how much? How much further into the future did he plan exactly? “Allow me to indulge myself to this fine opportunity you gave me, beloved Trickster.

“...A fine opportunity, indeed. Beautifully so.”

Allow Yume to flex on her non-existing French skills along with her companion, Google Translate. i sincerely apologize to any French Darlings out there yume did not attend a single French class in her life lol

Someone teach me French so I can write more things about this sexy bitch.

#rook hunt #yandere rook hunt #twisted wonderland #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere #Birthday Crumbs

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honey-makki · 3 years

Text

grandma’s blessing

best friend!hanamaki takahiro x fem!reader

warnings: mentions of death (family member), oral (fem receiving), fire, probably unsanitary cooking conditions if i’m being honest (it’s soft i swear)

summary: the holidays are your favorite time of year. your best friend hanamaki tries to keep holiday cheer alive despite the loss of a family member.

word count 2.4k

masterlist

Holiday’s are tricky. Decisions on whether the trauma of going home will be a heavier burden to bear than the guilt and loneliness of your city apartment. GOing home was never a pleasant experience. Trips filled with parents nitpicking your seemingly successful life and emotionally battering you about anything and everything they could. The only reprieve would be hugging your grandmother and being able to see her face-to-face during dinner. She understood why you didn’t come home every opportunity and didn’t blame you a bit.

On years when it would be too much to travel, you knew that she would still give you a call. Spending all day on the phone with you while you bounced around the kitchen making much smaller portions of what they would be eating at home. Even the small amounts of silence on the call were comfortable. You could feel her next to you kneading the dough for a pie while you mixed together the fruit base. It felt like home.

The silence that has been living in your apartment the past few months after her passing was suffocating. Weekends spent with friends at their apartment just to get out of somewhere that just seems to reek of death and despair.

You had spent more nights at Makki’s place in the past month than at your own. He was your closest friend, a true confidant, someone skilled at lifting your mood, and the person you’ve been undeniably in love with for years. You accepted the fate of growing old with a horde of cats as long as you can have his silly pink hair shining in the sun when you hung out with friends. It’s ok that you are going to be alone forever as long as you still had a standing laser tag date once a month. The only thing stronger than your feelings of love towards the strawberry blond was fear of losing him.

He has been a pillar of strength during the past few months. Holding your crying body until you fall asleep on his tear-stained and snot covered chest. Setting alarms in your phone to make sure you are eating or going to work instead of sitting in a dissociative state. Ever since you shared a bed with him, he’s been a little more comfortable with physical contact. Walking closer together arms touching when going out or throwing an arm over your shoulder when lounging around the house. You can’t count the number of times you’ve both woken up in various stages of cuddling.

He was the one to bring up spending the holidays together. He had just gone home for a wedding and couldn’t afford another ticket and he knew that you were in a weird spot. “We can stay here and make dinner and bake cookies and watch shitty r-romcoms? Someone has to appreciate Hallmark movies, why not us?” You can hear his voice crack and start to speed up as a blush rises across his face. You see it but don’t really process it, more relieved that for the first time in months, the thought of holidays didn’t make you run to the bathroom and throw up. You smiled and nodded, setting plans for him to come over later in the week.

Makki always liked when you cooked, throwing a western spin on dishes he considered normal. But today, he was flabbergasted, you didn’t let him just sit on the barstool curating music while you did all the work, no, there was too much food to be made for him to laze around. You laid out the recipe for your grandmothers’ mac n’ cheese, explaining what everything meant while you got started on an asian fusion stuffing you figured out a few years back.

You stole glances at him in the middle of stirring, combining and folding everything together. His tongue sticks out between his lips while he deliberately measures out the exact amount of cheese required. In all the time you’ve seen him, you’ve never seen him totally lose his laid back air until now, and you can’t control your laugh. Is he really more serious about measuring out sharp cheddar cheese than a game that would take them to nationals? Or that physics final he actually studied for? Your heart skips a beat when you see his soft, satisfied smile to the dish he just created. All you can picture when he looks over to you is how cute of a child he must have been. Cheeks round encasing his bright smile as his head tilts ever so slightly to the left.

After he slides the last dish into the oven, you both opt for taking the time to clean the kitchen, knowing that you won’t want to do it after dinner. The dishes are washed and dried and while Makki puts away the ones that go on a higher shelf, you return flour and other ingredients to the pantry but before you put them down you call out to him, voice lighter than normal, the one you use when asking a favor.

“Taka, how upset would you be if I said I wanted to cook a little bit more?”

“You get dishes this time around then, but what are we makin’?”

You turn out of the pantry with a bounce in your step before slapping down the flour and newly acquired, chocolate chips and sprinkles. “Cookies! We always made cookies with my grandma and it wouldn’t be the same without them.” Your eyes sparkle at the thought of the sweet treats and equally sweet memories of your childhood. Makki thinks you are breathtaking.

“Let me get the bowls back down and we can probably make mediocre cookies if you have anything you do with it.” He smiles at just how cute the squawk you made from his teasing is, just happy that he gets to be here with you. He doesn’t really hear how you defend your baking skills and complain that just because you forgot flour one time doesn’t mean you are inept at baking.

He never thought he would be the type to settle down and be domestic, it just didn’t seem like something he cared a lot about, but now he he can’t rid his mind of the thought of waking up ten minutes before your alarm just to make you a cup of coffee or throwing your favorite blanket in the drier on days it’s raining so when you get home, you can melt into the soft plush and warm up instantly.The clattering of spices brings him back to the moment, turning to see you picking up the cinnamon and vanilla extract.

“You good, love?” There’s something about how you look when you flustered because of him, that scratches an itch he didn’t know was there. The first time a pet name like this had slipped through his lips he was certain that whatever line the two of you were toeing had been crossed, demolished. Instead you just tucked your hair away and averted your gaze back to whatever shitty movie the two of you were “watching” that night. Now it’s normal, well its not normal, its very much not normal for him to refer to you as love or babe and it's not normal for you to exclusivley call him by his first name. It's decidedly abnormal considering your relationship or lack thereof. But if you aren’t going to question it neither is he.

He helps you up and gather the remaining ingredients for the “famous snickerdoodle cookies” that you swear had won awards. The mixing of the dough is interrupted when he has to grab your wrist to stop you from adding salt instead of sugar. You refuse to look at him because you know he is sporting a huge smirk and raised eyebrows, knowing that he’s right about you not being the best baker. You are reprieved by the oven going off, signaling to remove the earlier and change the temperature.

“Damn, babe, these cookies look so good, especially this one.” You return to Makki who already started to lay out the dough on the baking tray. You see perfectly round blobs squished slightly by a fork for a pattern and then right in front of him you see the cookie he was talking about. You didn't expect to see your 27 year old boyfriend-who-isn’t-your-boyfriend to be holding a cockshaoped cookie. But really, you should have seen it coming from the guy who laughs when either of you fart.

He can hear the clock ticking as you just stare, annoyed. He was concerned for a second, that maybe he shouldn’t have made a lewd joke when making cookies. This is something he used to do with her grandmother, you stupid idiot.. But when he can see the apple of your cheek peeking out from behind your hand, he recognizes that face. The one that positively exudes warmth and happiness with her laughter. The butterflies always buzzing in his stomach go wild when this face comes out. He would do anything to see it for the rest of time.

You don’t know where the courage comes from but you cup his cheek for a kiss, he mirrors your action. It just felt normal, and you honestly didn’t realize that it wasn’t normal until you both pulled back. Your eyes are locked on his, both of you sporting a soft smile until his keeps growing, evolving into a laugh that is borderline offensive in how loud it is.

You don’t know why and you get a little nervous that maybe he doesn’t feel the same way, when you go to hide your face, you feel the heat rising but also a soft powdery coating? And that’s when you realize his hands are still coated in flour from shaping the cookies. Your eyes are rolling while you chuckle but Makki on the other hand is losing his mind, almost in tears from laughing while putting the cookies in the oven. “It’s not that funny, Takahiro! Get me a napkin please.”

“Nah, you look really sweet. Good enough to eat.” You weren’t surprised when he returned to kissing you, nor when he lifted you up by your thighs and plopped you on the counter. The kisses are sweet, lazy and perfect for a second kiss, and a third and a fourth. This is normal. His lips belong on yours. Your hands should be tangled up in his hair while his run over your waist and legs. This is right. There's no rush to deepen the kiss, both of you happy to just indulge in the warmth of the other, but it is inevitable. A soft nip at your bottom lip or an accidental tug of his hair, neither of you know what happened first but you both are staring at each other, panting lightly with a much darker gaze than the original flour induced makeout session.

“You are just as sweet as I thought. Gotta have a taste.” His voice is raspier than you’ve ever heard and you just let him move your body as he pleases. Pull your hips to the edge of the counter. Spread your legs as far apart as they’ll go. Lift your hips when he pulls your shorts and underwear down. Gotta act as sweet as he says I am. He has barely touched you but when he falls to his knees and just stares at your dripping slit that he's imagined for years, your eyes, you are already imagining how good he's going to feel.

You shouldn’t even try to think, his tongue exceeded any expectation or desire you had. Expertly flicking against your throbbing clit as he works two fingers in you. You feel the groan he lets out when he dips his tongue into your hole before you hear it. The vibrations reverberate up your spine and through your body, an all-consuming heat starting in your stomach, threatening to let loose, to run rampant on your body. His fingers, joined by another, return to your clenching hole and search for the spongy spot hidden deep inside. All you can hear is the blood rushing through your head, drowning out every other noise.

“C’mon love, cum on my fingers, on my tongue, I’ve wanted, dreamed about this for years, give it to me.” His slow words juxtaposed the fervent pace of his fingers and it was enough to send you over the edge.

You feel so hot you fear you might pass out, the groan Makki lets out beneath you is the only thing keeping you grounded. You were first concerned that you had hurt him in someway, but when you see his eyes roll back into his head and his tongue trying to lap up every single bit of cum you squirted on his face and thighs, you know it wasn’t due to excruciating pain, rather it's just an obscene reaction to you.

When you push him back, squirming with overstimulation, you hear him scramble and “Shit! Fuck! Fire extinguisher?? WHERE IS YOUR FIRE EXTINGUISHER???” You are still out of it until he starts actually screaming, words still evade you but he follows your line of sight to the red tube hiding in the corner next to the fridge. The smell of smoke is overwhelming all of a sudden. You were in a dreamlike post orgasmic state and suddenly your coughing, eyes hazy.

the cookies, SHIT THE COOKIES!! Smoke is billowing out of the oven and your fire alarm is blaring, but soon the room is filled with a white foam originating from Makki. You never realized that the foam would continue to expand until half of your kitchen was covered in it and you saw a sheepish looking Makki on the other side.

“Fires out”. Again, he starts to laugh at you, and this time you join him. Today has turned out entirely different than you expected. It wasn’t a sad day, it was filled with laughter, romance, an ill timed fire and Makki. All in all, a successful holiday, despite the fact everything you cooked was coated in foam. He’d seen you staring at the food and already took his phone out to order food, “Indian or ramen?”

Yeah, you think you’re grandma would be happy seeing you like this. Happy Holidays.

a/n: i don’t really know what this is but the image of makki being a disaster in the kitchen came to me one day and here we are. make sure you read the other fics in the collab

matsukawa’s funeral home winter collab

a/n 2.0: also a/o to @iwaasfairy for making that makki image that i used in my header. i love her more than i love him which say a lot

#hanamaki takahiro #hanamaki drabble #hanamaki x y/n #hanamaki smut #haikyuu smut #makki smut #makki x reader #makki x you #hanamaki x reader #hanamaki.coffee #kristen.writes #oral.espresso

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 3 years

Note

What I don’t get is why the antis keep claiming Alina was so much better and happier without her powers when it’s shown over and over that’s not the case? Even with completely changing M*l’s personality it still holds true that Alina never felt like she belonged anywhere. I know M*linas want really badly for their ship to be like Darklina but without the “problematic”elements but they were never thus star crossed lovers romance or equals in any way in the books or the show for that matter. He might support and protect her in the latter but that doesn’t mean he’ll actually understand her and what she’s going through(it also doesn’t help they didn’t give him real personality,lol). Also can we stop putting all the blame on Alina for being in a co dependent relationship with M*l? Like antis keep justifying their trash ship by saying it was Alina’s choice to keep her powers hidden,etc and M*l was supportive and risked so much for her. Not only does this remind me of when they use the same excuse about Aleksander having a traumatic past but it also reeks of victim blaming. Also there’s a reason why Doyalist and Westonian readings exist. From the latter’s perspective yes it’s Alina’s choice to keep her powers alway but it’s because of M*l and he doesn’t really mind that she does if anything he’s awful and unsupportive even on the show he just brushes it off and seems happy about the fact.From Doyalist’perspective M*l represents something that’s holding Alina back and from whom she needs to let go off unfortunately they didn’t happen because the author was super biased and wanted to force her endgame(it reminds me of JKR doing the same with the endgame couples in Harry Potter)but it’s 101 writing,seriously!

(Book Spoilers) (Trigger Warning: Mentions of Self Harm.)

I really struggle to believe that Alina could be happy without of her powers because in the books she is put in a situation where she can't/doesn't use her powers three times. Once in each book, in book one its when she pushes her powers down so she can stay with M*l, in the second when she and M*l are hiding from the darkling, in the third when she is kept underground by the Apparat. Each time we see her suffering, she is sickly, she feels weak and she is just generally miserable without them. I mean surely having her powers stripped from her at the end of the trilogy must have reminded her of those times when she couldn't use them before. I find it hard to believe she was happy because the narrative within the books tells me that when she struggles without her powers and that she misses using them at like a soul level, it's so damaging to her. The time she spends underground in R&R in particular where its not that she chooses not to use her powers but where she physically can't was really sad, I really hated seeing her so just, I don't know how to describe but it was like soul crushing for her and it made me feel physically uncomfortable and sad reading those scenes and seeing how much it affected her. I do feel like it likely traumatised her so I can imagine losing her powers altogether that also must have been very traumatising. She loses apart of herself. I've said it before but sometimes I feel like antis look at Alina losing her powers the same way they would if she lost a piece of jewellery, its sad to lose something sentimental like a bracelet, but you can live without it. But her powers weren't an accessory to her they were an integral part of her, LB might as well have ripped her soul out. Seeing the effect not having her powers had on her, especially when it was because the apparat was deliberately keeping her trapped to keep her weak, seeing how much she suffered, was a large part of the reason why I was so upset when I found out what Alina's fate was come the end. The fact that one of the times she went through the struggle of not having her powers was because she wanted to be with M*l and seeing how much M*l wanted her to give up her powers despite this is also why I hated that she ended up with him. I mean she pretty much self harmed because she was so dependant on him and couldn't cope with the idea of leaving him. But I 100% agree with you nobody should be blaming Alina for that co-dependency its a result of her trauma of becoming an orphan and needing someone to cling too. That's not her fault. However Alina as part of her story arc really should have grown out of that relationship as it would show how she is healing from that trauma. M*lina really should have let each other go and the really frustrating part was there were a few times in the trilogy where they nearly do. There is a moment in S&S where she seems to realise that he isn't ever going to be happy at the Little Palace and with her being in a prominent political position and she nearly lets him go. The same in the beginning of R&R where it seems like they have both accepted that they were on different paths and that they should move on from each other. But LB never commits to it and in the end we end up with that forced endgame where Alina loses her powers and ends up exactly where she started the series.

#alina starkov #anti mal #anti malina #anti leigh bardugo #answered

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latte-fairytaekwoon · 4 years

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𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎! 𝙰𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚣 𝙿𝚛𝚘𝚏𝚒𝚕𝚎𝚜:

𝙹𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚈𝚞𝚗𝚑𝚘

Disclaimer: In no way am I condoning, justifying, encouraging nor trying to romanticize yandere behavior. This is all a work of fiction and not meant to represent real life scenarios.

Warning: Mentions of toxic relationship, yandere behavior, self harm, sexual scenes, guilt tripping, gas lighting and other forms of mental manipulation are contained within this post. Read at your own discretion.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

𝐁𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧:

𝙽𝚊𝚖𝚎: 𝙹𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚈𝚞𝚗𝚑𝚘

𝙳.𝙾.𝙱: 𝙼𝚊𝚛𝚌𝚑 𝟸𝟹𝚛𝚍, 𝟷𝟿𝟿𝟿

𝙷𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝: 𝟷𝟾𝟼 𝙲𝙼/ 𝟼'𝟷 𝙵𝚝

𝙰𝚐𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: ■■□□□40%

𝙾𝚋𝚜𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: ■■■■■100%

𝙼𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢: ■■■■□80%

𝙾𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝 𝙻𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕: 𝙻𝚘𝚠

𝚈𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝙲𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗: 𝙳𝚎𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝

𝙱𝚎𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝙰𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚜:

• 𝙸𝚗𝚊𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚘𝚋𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚊𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 .

•𝚄𝚗𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚑𝚢 𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝.

•𝙵𝚊𝚒𝚕𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚞𝚗𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚢 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚋𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚊𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗.

• 𝙴𝚡𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚖𝚎 𝚜𝚞𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚍𝚊𝚕/ 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏-𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚒𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚘𝚛 𝚊𝚐𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍.

•𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏- 𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚒𝚣𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚍𝚎𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Normal Yunho at first seems like your average guy. He's very sweet, caring, playful and his close, and very few, friends he has would say that he's full of energy and smiles.

He just radiates this sunshine personality that draws people to him, although they may not stay very long.

He met you through mutual friends and acted the same as he did with others.

Albeit it's true, he was very affectionate towards you from the start, which both surprised and didn't surprise his friends.

But that doesn't mean he felt love at first sight with you.

Yunho isn't one to get overly attached right away.....yet.

It happened gradually.

He became attracted to your confident, strong and bold nature, all traits which he lacked in.

But no one knows that because he's good at hiding it.

You were also a very compassionate and empathetic person, which sealed the deal for him.

He admired you from afar, not wanting to get close to you just yet.

However, he'd get pouty and insecure whenever another man would show intentions of wanting to get close to you.

He'd whine often about it and that's how you found out he had feelings for you.

You thought it was cute, that he was cute.

So you were the one who took the first step to start a relationship.

Although shocked, Yunho was extremely happy.

As a boyfriend, he is very devoted to you, putting you above everything else, including his friends, family and health.

Everything moves really fast with him. Example:you had your first kiss on your first date.

Yunho just doesn't see why you have to wait if you two love each other.

"I feel like I've known you my whole life."

Not even 3 months later and you were already sleeping together.

Yunho sees that was the moment he went to heaven......

And that was the moment when hell started.

Yunho started becoming more and more clingy.

Texting, calling you at odd hours, asking you things like where you were, what were you doing, who you were with and if he could go see you.

He usually makes you stay till very late at his place that you have to spend the night with him.

No other option. He insists.

Even keeps spare clothes for you in a drawer he set aside just for you.

Till one day: "Why don't you just move in with me? It'll be so much easier and I could see you even more."

You hesitated, since you were barely 6 months into the relationship and you already felt smothered by his constant presence.

"I don't.... I don't know Yunho.."

He panicked at your hesitation.

"Why...why not? Don't you love me? Is it because you don't want to be around me?"

You began calming him down, trying to explain that maybe things were going to fast, but that only made him get more agitated.

It was truly terrifying for you to see him hyperventilating and choking on his own breathing like that.

Hot tears were falling rapidly down his face as he began saying:

"Why don't you love me? Is it something I did? What am I doing wrong? Tell me!"

"Yunho you did nothing wrong. You're perfect the way you are and I love you just the way you are."

He sniffled and wiped his nose on one of his sweater paws.

"Do you love me? R-really?"

You nodded your head in confirmation. But Yunho was still sulky about something.

"But then.... wha-why not move in? I p-promise you'll like it."

He looked at you with such fragile and tender eyes that you could not refuse him. So you agreed to move in with him.

Biggest mistake you made.

Even though he had his eye on you for most of the day, it wasn't enough for him.

If you were even 3 minutes home later than usual, he was badgering you with questions like:

"Who were you with? What took you so long?"

And you're like "Geez. Let me breathe."

Don't say things like that to him. He starts feeling bad and responds with things like:

"I know I'm sorry, I'm such a pathetic excuse of a boyfriend."

It honestly broke your heart to hear him say such things.

But it also irritated you how jealous he got when you hung out or even talked to another man that wasn't him.

He'd latched onto you in public if he felt you were paying more attention than he liked to another guy.

Sometimes would cause a scene that made you run back home in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry! I just can't help it! Don't you get it?! They're trying to take you away from me!"

"No! You're just an overly possessive and overly jealous boyfriend and I can't stand it anymore! I'm leaving."

"Wait what?"

Yunho watched in horror as you began packing a small bag so you could spend the night somewhere else, and pick up the rest of your stuff later.

All throughout that, Yunho begged, cried and went ballistic.

He repeated for you not to go, not to leave him.

"Y/N you don't understand....you can't leave me... I'll die, I can't live without you.."

You merely rolled your eyes at that. No one dies of a broken heart.

So you just walked out the door and rented a hotel room for the night, unaware of the mess you were about to wake up to.

You woke up bombarded by texts and missed calls from Yunho's friends:

"What did you do to him?!" "You heartless bitch!" "I hope you die if anything happens to him!" "All he did was love you and you destroyed him."

Then the hospital called you: Yunho had tried to kill himself in the night.

Your heart stopped when you found out. You felt so guilty and you felt like a monster.

Without thinking twice, you ran to the hospital to see him.

He layed there, still unconscious from the medication they gave him to calm him down.

You stayed by his side, praying that he'd wake up soon so you could apologize.

He woke up and although he looked surprise to see you....he was only feigning.

Of course you'd go out of your way to see him.

You were bawling your eyes out and holding him close, scared out of your wits at the thought that you almost lost the love of your life.

Yunho apologized, but you hushed him with a kiss, saying it wasn't his fault.

From then on, you began blaming yourself for everything....

And he made sure to remind you not to test him again.

You thought that after that talk, everything would be back to normal and you two could be a regular couple.

How stupid you were.

Life with Yunho now was like walking on thin ice all the time.

You couldn't mention anything about him that made you slightly uncomfortable because he's belittling himself with such foul words, crying to the point of hysteria....

But the worst times are when he's banging his head on a wall hard enough to draw blood, or punching the concrete wall so hard that his knuckles end up bloody and bruised.

You have a heart attack whenever that happens.

You've been so traumatized by his previous suicide attempt that any harm he does to himself sends you in a panic and you're holding him to you, comforting him and reminding him that you love him and won't ever leave him.

Then happy Yunho is back, as if nothing happened.

And he always wants you to reaffirm your love after such ordeals in the bedroom.

Yunho never ever fucks you, no matter how messed up he is.

He likes to take his time with you, going down on you or teasing you with his long fingers before he's thrusting his cock deep inside you.

Always cums inside you, always. With no protection.

It's a reminder that you belong to him and him only.

And also because he knows there's a possibility he could get you pregnant.

Which is what he wants.

If you two have a child together, it would only strengthen the bond you two have and it's another reason to tie you down to him.

And that's exactly what happened.

You were terrified and tried to conceal it for the longest time, but Yunho isn't dumb.

He was elated when he found out you were carrying his child inside of you.

Which only prompted his obsessive nature to escalate.

He made you quit your job because he wanted you to stay home to take care of your baby.

Of course, that's just an excuse to keep you from leaving the house.

You two also officially got marriage, and that was it for Yunho.

He finally succeeded in bounding you two together for life.

As a father, he doesn't mind sharing you with your new baby daughter.

He loves and adores his daughter very dearly because she is a physical manifestation of the love between him and you.

But she's the only child you two are having. There's only so many people he's willing to share you with.

To others, he's a doting and loving father and husband.

In the eyes of an outsider, you guys are the perfect family.

But you.....you stopped fighting a long time ago.

You resigned yourself to accept that this is your life now and you'd better make the best of it.

You're no longer the strong, confident and decisive woman you once were.

Yunho made sure to tear that all down to the point where you simply just act in a way that'll make him happy and won't trigger him to repeat what happened years ago...

Especially not in front of your daughter. You do not want her to experience what you did.

So the question remains.....how do you escape Yandere Yunho?

Well....... you have two choices:

Either spend the rest of your life playing into his façade of a perfect relationship, that's the easier choice.

It certainly spares you the mental, emotional and physical strain of fearing when his next suicide attempt might happen if you do anything that'll result in him degrading himself or guilt tripping you into staying with him.

Or..........kill yourself. But keep in mind that if you do, he won't be too far behind from you. In the words of Yandere! Yunho himself:

"Nothing will ever break our bond, our bond is forever. Even in death, our love will go on."

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hunflowers · 4 years

Text

MYTHOLOGY (I)

Word Count: 6.4k

Requested? Not exactly, but you always can here :)

A/N; OMGGG it’s finally here. I’m sorry for the long wait but I really hope you all enjoy the first part of demigod!Harry. And listen, I’m gonna be honest, this part is probably a little boring bc this is all about background/the past leading to the present, so pls bear with me because i promise it’ll be good! Anywho onwards to the story, have fun! *nose boops*

tag list: @thicksniall @meetmeinfleetwood @afire-hes @pradaxstyles @c-h-e-r-r-y-y @gotmyhandonmyheart @burberryharold @harrymoncheri

Life is a funny thing.

Everyone thinks they know who they are and how their life is going to pan out. There’s a meticulous planning to life that people try to control; a plan that decides where they end up, who they end up with, and how happy they end up. But it’s so far out of everyone’s control, and not a single person could claim they were successful.

Calista thought for once she was in control, that maybe if she took matters into her own hands, everything was going to go the way she wanted.

And everything was starting to look up.

From birth to present, her life has always been one filled with uncertainty. Uncertain about where she was going to live, if she was going to eat, if she’d ever find a family that would love her. All her life she wished for something to go her way, for something to go right instead of left.

When she hit the turning age of eighteen, things did start to look up for her. All her life she’s been on the lower level standards of society, grazing by, by the skin of her teeth. She figured her life was doomed from the start considering she never really had a true family, or a true support system.

As a baby she was left on the doorstep of some random woman’s house, and then that woman handed her over to the nearest orphanage, which then turned her over to the foster care system. From the moment she was born she hadn’t been wanted by anyone, not even her own parents, and all her childhood was between homes and ignorant foster parents who hardly ever cared for her existence, but rather the check she brought in for them.

A person’s childhood is meant to represent the happiest portion of their life. Being able to look back on memories that last forever, memories that weld nostalgia, and memories that you’ll forever hold close to your heart.

This wasn’t Calista’s case.

For Cal, all she can remember is the constant bullying from foster siblings because of her innate ability to be a good student; The constant slaps and kicks and punches thrown her way because she was too slow to stop them; The never ending verbal abuse of being alone with no friends.

Every day she went to school and wished she could never leave, because at school people at least left her alone. No one cared to talk to her so that meant she didn’t have to deal with anyone, and she liked that more than anything. It was going home that was the problem. There were plenty of times she contemplated running away, finding a home that would accept her, but she always talked herself down, saying one day these people will be nice to her. She had high hopes and tried to see the best of every situation, but time after time she was let down when she was pushed into a wall or tripped on the sidewalk.

The last home she was in before she turned eighteen had been the worst of them all. Every night she cried herself to sleep, and prayed to whoever would listen that she needed to be saved, that she shouldn’t have to live her life like this and that hopefully one day, things will start to look up. Then they did, and it was incredibly shocking. Cal was awarded a full ride scholarship to the University of Cambridge, a goal she’d never think she would achieve. The moment she got the news she made sure to put in extra hours at work and even get a second job so the moment she graduated high school she could leave, and head straight for England.

She had been tempted to tell her foster parents, to see if maybe they would be happy for her, but every time she tried, they shot her down and forced her to do work around the house or banished her to her room for the night and left her starving. No words could ever properly convey how excited she was to put this part of her life behind her, to start somewhere new, and to hopefully make better memories along the way.

So, her eighteenth birthday passed and high school graduation flew by, and before she knew it, she was packing up without a word to anyone, and moved away. She didn’t really have a plan as to what she would do once she got there, but anything was going to be better than her old life.

Calista had bounced around a few motel rooms over the course of a couple months before she moved into her dorm room, keeping herself busy with a few different jobs to try and save up a bit of money. Even here it was difficult trying to stand on solid ground, and she can’t say she expected much else with the cards she’s been dealt in life, but with this new start she figured it would be at least a little better than life back over the ocean.

Then the unexpected happened.

She made a friend at the restaurant she had been working at.

Trinity Kim, the bestest friend Calista could ever ask for. Usually, when people talk of soulmates, they talk of significant others. If anyone were to ask Cal who her soulmate was, she’d say Trinity, Trin for short.

It’s almost as if they were destined to be friends. They were alike in every way possible, but they were also so different which kept things interesting. For example, they both had lived pretty tough lives before meeting one another. Though Trin wasn’t in foster care her whole life, her father and step-mom had been involved in her life so little that she nearly forgot they ever existed. Their biggest connection had been that they never had met their birth mothers, which at first was oddly coincidental, but now, a few years later, it was strangely comforting for them to have something so deep in common. It’s hard to relate to people who have stable homes, because for Calista, well, she doesn’t; And not that she wants people to feel the way she does, but for some reason, when she found out Trin had a bit of a messed up life too, it helped her feel not so alone in this scary reality.

Then they found out they’re actually going to the same University, and that’s when they knew they’d be inseparable. Because what’re the odds of that?

Adapting to this new lifestyle was a rollercoaster for Calista, not that she expected any different, but three years later, she still found life a little overwhelming from time to time. Though this life was infinitely better than her one back in the states, it didn’t stop her underlying insecurities of not fitting in anywhere. She has Trin, and the few other friends she’s made over the years, but no matter where she was she never felt this sense of… belonging.

A lot of people she knew at school were business majors, looking to go into finance and everything else associated with the program, because they were trying to build stable careers. Calista on the other hand invested her life into the classical studies program, because for some reason she had this weird fascination with ancient life ever since she was a little girl, finding Greek and Roman life to be so interesting. It wasn’t a popular major, and people she told always tried to bring her down because of it, claiming she’d never get anywhere in life knowing stuff about mythological gods that never existed.

She’s learned to grow a tough exterior, not letting people and their dumb criticisms get in her way anymore. She’s a blooming adult, and she’s learned the hard way that sometimes people are just mean for the sake of being mean, so she’s put on her big girl pants and sticks up for herself now, never giving anyone the chance to walk all over her anymore.

Trinity has also helped Calista in boosting her self-confidence, giving her that little push to bite back at people that bark. There was one time they were at a party, and a girl came up to Calista, claiming she had been flirting with her boyfriend - and truth is, she had been, but she wouldn’t have if she knew he had a girlfriend - and when she starting calling her names, Calista spat right back at her, telling her to get a better boyfriend if this one was flirting with other women, and that maybe she should get a better taste in men.

Normally, Cal would’ve just apologized and moved on, but she’s so sick of people thinking they could just say or do whatever they want to her.

That’s why on one special night, Calista’s life changed forever.

She had been coming home from work with Trin, their job only a few streets away from their shared apartment, so they walked. It had been a nice night out, the moon in its crescent phase, glistening in the indigo sky, accompanied by a few scattered stars. It was a night just like every other one, until it wasn’t.

“Trin, I’m telling you, Niall likes you.”

“Please! He likes you, I know he does.”

“How could he like me, if he’s told me himself that he likes you?”

Trinity paused in her steps, halting Calista a few steps ahead of her, looking over her shoulder with a confused look. Trinity was looking around, as if she saw something Calista didn’t, a worrisome face etched into her features. “Trin?”

The situation wasn’t helped by the fact they were in a more remote part of the city, no cars or people around at this time of night. They were both too poor to afford a car, hardly getting by with their rent money, and this is when that lack of money would bite them in the ass. The weird part was, Trin didn’t really seem unnerved about her surroundings or anything, she just looked confused. That’s when Calista saw something move in the corner of her eye, or someone actually. They appeared from the alley a few feet away, as if that wasn’t creepy at all, and stood beneath the streetlamp that hovered above them, illuminating a dull golden glow around them.

There were two people, a boy and a girl watching the two friends, hands at their sides, holding some sort of… weaponry. It was hard to tell, but from a distance it almost looked like they were holding swords. All Calista could think about, rather than her fear of being killed, is who uses a sword anymore?

Their faces seemed oddly recognizable even though she’s pretty sure she’s never seen them before. Yet, she felt like she knew them. Though, it seems Trin does when she speaks nonchalantly to them, shoulders relaxed in relief of it not being some crazed serial killer. “What the fuck do you guys want?”

The girl ignored her, keeping her dark eyes fixated on Calista, skimming the length of her body in disgust, a grimace resting on her features as she rolls her eyes at Calista just simply standing there. “We were told to relay a message to you.”

“And this had to be done at ten at night, next to an alley?” Trin deadpanned, crossing her arms over her chest. Cal stood off to the side, lost out of her mind as the three bickered back and forth for some odd seconds, wondering what in the hell was going on. She still couldn’t even pinpoint where she knew these people from.

Not to mention, she was still beyond confused about why they had fucking swords.

The boy caught her eyeing the metal, pushing the material of his jacket back a little bit so the silver shined under the streetlamp, either showing it off or trying to taunt her. Yet, her only response to that was an eye roll and a tap of her foot as she continued to ache from her six hour shift. It was weird how she didn’t feel at all threatened in this situation, but something in the back of her mind told her that if it were to go south, she’d be okay. Maybe not, she’s hardly ever been violent in her life, usually taking pain but never giving it.

“Tell her yet?” The girl jutted her head in Calista’s direction, again eyes raking her body with a look of disgust written on her lips.

“No, they said not to,” Trin replied, side glancing to Cal quickly, praying in her mind the curly haired girl didn’t ask questions when they left.

The thing about Trinity is that although to Calista, her appearance in her life seemed completely natural and as if they bonded purely on their backgrounds, that wasn’t completely true. For three years Trinity has been keeping the biggest secret of her best friend’s life and it’s been eating her alive ever since the small age of thirteen. When she was younger, she was told about how her future was meant to unfold with the mystery girl from across the atlantic, and how she was sworn to secrecy because it could end both of their lives if any wrong person found out the truth.

It was a lot for a thirteen year old to take in, but Trin knew she had to be strong.

But, when word got around that Calista was making her way over, that’s when Trinity was told to ease the girl as slowly and painlessly as possible into her righteous lifestyle. Trinity though, couldn’t grow the balls to ever do that, always fearing that she’d cause pain to her newfound friend and that -- from personal experience -- finding out the truth can be very, very difficult. So she hasn’t told her about her true history, and she’s felt awful about it.

Though, due to Cal’s impeccable speed, she beat her friend to the answer of that question, “Tell me what?”

The short blonde girl looked to her opposer, a smirk sliding across her lips before she glanced up to the guy, nudging his arm with her elbow. “This is gonna be good.”

“Can someone tell me what’s going on right now, or?” Calista pressed, looking at all three of them, no one jumping to give her the answer she had been looking for, for the past five minutes.

Trinity looked nervous, gnawing at her bottom lip as she seemed to be in pain with whatever was going around inside her mind. Her lack of talking spoke volumes louder, though; Because her silence meant she was keeping a secret. It was hard to gauge whether or not the impact this secret would have, but a secret was a secret, and Calista hates secrets.

Her whole life had been nothing but a secret considering she had no idea who even birthed her, or if she had any family that was maybe looking for her, or what day she was even born on. Her declared date of birth was the day the woman found her on her porch. She had secrets up the wazoo, and anymore was just bound to break her.

Again, Trinity wasn’t the one to speak up, as now the guy decided to open his mouth, “What do you know about Greek mythology?”

Calista was taken aback by the question, stumbling around in her mind how that was at all relevant. It was also oddly concerning a question so random held so much relevance in her life considering her studies focused around this area of history. “Uh… why?”

“Don’t listen to them, Lis,” Trin interjected, taking a small step forward between her friend at the two a few paces away.

“Well, if you’re not going to, we will,” the girl retorted, now taking her own step forward. From the looks of it from Calista’s point of view, any more hostility verbally, those weird fucking swords of theirs were going to come in handy. And even though she had the slight fear of being impaled to death, something inside of her sparked some sense of nobility, going to stand next to a frustrated Trinity.

“I think someone should tell me something soon before I lose my mind.”

“Well, c’mon then Trinity, tell her. Mr. Cirillo said you have twelve hours, or we’re coming back and doing it ourselves; That’s why we’re here,” the girl shrugged, picking at the chipped black nail polish on her thumb.

Trinity scoffed, rolling her eyes, “Why wouldn’t he just tell me himself?”

“Because he’s tired of telling you and you not listening,” she spat back. “Look, I’d rather her not know either, because I don’t need any more competition for my title, but there’s apparently been a threat, and we need all the hands we can get in case a war breaks out. Plus, it’s unfair for her to keep living a lie. Twelve hours.” And then they walked back into the alley, and disappeared as if they hadn’t been there in the first place.

Calista’s mind was swirling down a very long drain to say the least. A war?Living a lie? Competition for a title? None of it made sense and she wasn’t sure if it ever would. Silence fell upon them the moment they started their journey back home again, not that she knew what to say. She had so many questions buzzing around her brain that she didn’t even know where to begin. Who even were those two?

And what the fuck was Trinity keeping from her?

The second they stepped through the door of their apartment, Calista flopped herself down on the couch, clutching her head as a migraine began to seep its way into her problems for the night. She didn’t want to be the one the break the thin ice they’d been itching their way across for the past fifteen minutes, but as Trinity paced around, biting at the tip of her thumb, clearly lost in her own thoughts, Cal figured she’d better be the first to speak before she bursts at the seams from anticipation. “Trin, help a girl out, what the hell is going on?”

She stopped her walking, head snapping to the side as her eyes frantically observed the sitting girl that was pushing her sweaty hair back from off her forehead. Whenever everything was dealt with, they seriously had to talk to their landlord about the excessive heating in their flat. It was as if they still had the heat on even when it was blazing outside.

Trinity took a breath, closing her eyes shut for a brief moment before collecting herself and sitting down on the available leather cushion. “I need to start this off by saying I’m sorry.”

“For wha--”

“Please… just let me finish.”

Calista nodded her head, silently agreeing to let her continue, slowly bracing herself for whatever was bound to be revealed. This deep pit nestled in her stomach, gravity weighing her down as anxiety built up inside pouring out of her as she continuously carded her fingers through the ends of her knotty hair.

“I’m so fucking sorry for lying t’you, and for keeping shit a secret -- even though I was told to -- and I need you to know that it has been my fault for you not knowing any sooner than tonight.“

“You’re really sca--”

Trin gave her a pointed look, causing her to shut her mouth nearly immediately. “Do you… remember when Damien, uh, the guy from before, asked you about Greek mythology?” Calista nodded her head in remembrance, choosing to keep her mouth shut in fear of being told to shut up again.

“The reason he asked you is because, well, it’s not exactly a myth. It’s quite real and well, you’re a part of it. And by that I mean uh… you’re the daughter of the goddess Athena.”

❊ ❊

Calista couldn’t fall asleep that night.

She laid in bed, covers pulled up to her chest as she stared up at the ceiling, hands resting on her chest as the last of her tears dried on her skin. Her mind hasn’t given her a moment to calm down, thought after thought popping up as question after question runs around, giving her feeling after feeling of all different types of emotions.

She wasn’t happy, that much was for certain given the circumstances. I don’t think anyone can have their life flipped upside down so drastically and be happy about it. But, she wasn’t exactly sad about it either. It’s not everyday someone finds out they’re a literal demigod. Truth is, she doesn’t really know how to feel, because how does one feel when they find out why her life turned out the way it had?

When she came to college, this wasn’t the Greek life she imagined herself joining.

Her mother, Athena, goddess of wisdom, warfare, and handicraft met her father twenty-one years ago. Her father wanted nothing to do with her and well, Athena couldn’t exactly be a proper mother with her god duties and such, so Calista was left alone. It’s said that her mother watches over her everyday, but if that were true why would she allow her daughter to lead such an awful life?

When Calista was thirteen, supposedly people had come to her house to take her to her awaited lifestyle, something she never knew happened. But, her foster mother at the time told them she didn’t want to go with them and that she was happy where she was -- which was a complete lie, because that woman most likely slapped her five minutes prior. Conveniently, not even two weeks later Calista was transferred to a different home because the woman couldn’t take care of her anymore.

This explains her interest in classical studies, considering she’s technically part of those studies, but her choice to Cambridge was a complete chance, in Trin’s words. But, when news spread that she was coming over seas, that’s when these people felt it was finally time to reel her in. Calista isn’t exactly sure who these people are, because Trinity was pretty vague in her explanations, but from what she can gather, they’re other demigods and mythological creatures and whatever else that are part of this life.

Aside from this whole new truth being exposed to her, the thing battling with her most is what she’s gonna do about Trinity. She’s her best friend, she loves her more than she loves herself, but she can’t put aside the fact that she literally kept the biggest secret of her life from her, because she wasn’t ready to tell her. Trinity was being selfish, and Calista doesn’t know what to do.

All her life she’s dealt with people being the worst to her, and for once she thought someone was different. Turns out, everyone is a liar and chooses to be the worst possible person in front of her. It’s this constant tug of war going on in her brain, that she’ll never be good enough for anything or anyone, and the moment she accepted that, she got Trin. But of course, that was ripped right from her, just like everything else.

Fuck, she’s not even good enough to be a demigod.

The following few days they had hardly spoken to one another. Calista because she was still holding this frustrated anger within her that she’s not exactly certain how to express without blowing her top; And Trin, afraid to get her head chewed off with a promising breakdown following on her part. They were walking on eggshells around one another, to the point they sort of avoided each other to the best of their abilities in their small apartment.

The first time they genuinely spoke was when Trinity said she had to bring Cal to a discreet location where she’ll get more answers from people that know just a little bit more. It was explained though that this is where Trinity ventured off to in the summertime when she went away on “vacation.” Vacation just simply meaning travelling to this camp/school site where she trains and learns more about her true heritage.

It’s hard for Calista to understand what exactly she’s training for, but she guesses that’s why this little trip to this place is necessary.

When they arrived, she was in pure awe at the inspiration of old Greek architecture, noticing the ionic columns lining the front of the big building. Μυθολογία was nestled into the marble, the translation from Greek meaning Mythology, which Trin had mentioned at some point that the name of this place was simply named Mythology because that’s what all of this is supposed to be.

A myth.

“This is where everyone basically sleeps and where we train if it’s raining. There are also a few offices for like, the ancients, so,” Trinity explained, walking them up the set of steps that led them to the main door.

Calista could hardly pay attention to what her friend was saying as she gawked at the intricate and beautiful layout of the foyer in front of her, admiring the various statues and paintings that contained her… mother. “She’s a beautiful woman, isn’t she?” A voice spoke behind her, causing her to whip her head around, coming face to face with an older man that had greying hair and a few wrinkles lining his face.

Oh, and one eye.

“Stunning,” she replied, taking one more look at the goddess before giving her full attention to the man.

“I’m Mr. Cirillo. It’s an honor to meet you, Calista,” he stuck his hand out, which she grasped in her own, shaking it firmly, trying not to stare too hard at the fact that he has one eye but she also doesn’t want to be rude and not give eye contact.

She gulped, taking a look at Trin who was busy on her phone, before smiling softly back up at the tall man. “I’m sorry… I’m still trying to wrap my head around all of this,” she apologized, taking in a deep breath and looking at the few people that walked by them in the foyer, making an awkward eye contact as they started whispering to themselves about her.

Great, even when she’s meant to fit in, she still can’t.

“Believe me, it would be more concerning if it wasn’t a lot to take in. I’m not going to overload you just yet, Trinity will be showing you where you’ll be staying and then head to the cafeteria, you must be hungry from the ride here,” he suggested, placing his hand on hers and Trin’s shoulders, guiding them in the direction they were meant to be.

Then, Trinity was taking her hand, leading her up the grand staircase in front of them, leading them down endless hallways to finally get to their shared room. It was a decently sized room, half of it clearly inhabited by Trin as it was messy and had a few of her signature posters lining the wall. The other half however was very empty, only adorned by the full size bed and wardrobe and small nightstand table. “You’ve been set as my roommate since I first moved in,” Trinity spoke quietly, picking at her fingernails as she sat on the edge of her own bed.

Calista nodded her head, setting her suitcase down next to her bed. Walking over to the window seat, sitting herself down on the soft blue cushion, overlooking what must be a courtyard as across from her just seemed to be more rooms that were down a different hallway. They both sat in silence for some odd minutes before Calista took the plunge and said, “I just wish you told me.”

Nearly immediately Trinity responded, jumping up from her seat and padding over to her friend, standing a couple feet away. “I’m so sorry, Lis. I have no good reason to explain why I didn’t, but I regret it so fucking much. I shouldn’t have been selfish and I need you to know I’m just so, so sorry. I probably screwed up your trust in me, but I’m going to do whatever I can to fix this.”

Both of their eyes watered, emotions flooding through both of them as they wind up in a few more moments of silence. They’ve never not talked or hardly ever got in fights, and by this point, they were both just sick of the never ending silence and wished everything could just go back to the way it was. But, it can’t, though they’ll both do everything they can to resume some sort of normalcy and hopefully repair this strained relationship.

Calista looked to her friend, nodding her head in a silent acknowledgement that she knows she’s going to try hard, and stands up to bring her in for a hug. It was the most awkward hug of their life, but it definitely was a start. They both cried a bit, but when they separated they raised their hands and wiped away each other’s tears, laughing a bit to themselves.

Sniffling, Trin stood straighter, gesturing around the room, “Alright, well this is our lovely humble abode. You can do whatever you want to your side and uh… Oh! These small little statues,” she pointed to the small sculptures that were in little cubbies by the window, “are our mothers. So, y’know, Athena is on your side and Artemis is on mine. As if we don’t see their faces around here enough, but honestly I think it’s so no funny business can go down in our rooms because, well, our parents are watching which is weird.”

“Trinity Kim, has any funny business gone down in this room?” Calista questions, raising her eyebrow at her friend. She immediately turned red at the inquiry, turning hot on her heel and over to the door. “C’mon, let’s get some food before it’s all eaten.”

Calista gasped at her blatant avoidal of the question, “Trin!”

❊ ❊

There were a lot of people around. A lot more than Calista could expect.

And surprisingly, aside from when she first entered and people were whispering about her, a lot of people were completely welcoming. She was the talk of the town apparently, everyone knowing who she was and crowding around her to introduce themselves. She felt bad since she had not a clue who any of them were but it seems none of them cared.

The thing that surprised her most was to see Niall, another friend of hers and Trin’s that went to school with them, here. It makes her wonder who else she knows from school that’s here.

And apparently Niall is the son of Poseidon? Which is pretty fucking cool, and explains a lot about him, like his obsession with pool sports. Or, just water in general.

But, now that she knows Niall’s here, she wonders if he’s who’s been in her room with Trin. She tried to pry it out of her friend before, and she was so close to getting an answer, but then Niall came over to them and she immediately shut up.

She also saw those two people from the other night, Damien and Wren, that sat by themselves in the corner of the grand room, seeming completely uninterested in anything that involved everyone else. Trinity had explained that they think they’re better than everyone else here so they hardly take time out of their day to engage with others.

Damien’s Zeus’ son, so because his father is Mr. Almighty, he basically thinks he holds that same title, when in reality he’s just a dickhead. He’s mediocre at best at combat, with or without weapons, and is just plain rude and egotistical. Wren is the daughter of Ares, so she thinks she’s something special because she’s the best female fighter this place has ever seen. Which, it’s pretty cool to be the best, but that doesn’t mean she has to be a bitch about it.

Their whole dinner, Trin and Niall tried giving her the scoop of everyone deemed necessary -- their words -- but one person in particular stood out to her. He was on the opposite side of the room, and even though he’s sitting at a table, it looks like everyone sitting with him, is there just because he is. Calista could admit it is difficult to not pay attention to him, his vibrant smile and glowing aura drawing anyone to him.

His name’s Harry, and according to Niall, he’s the best male soldier this place has ever seen. It was hard for Niall to admit it, but he can’t avoid the truth. Unlike Damien who despised Harry for it, them two supposedly always going head to head about who was better. “Damien can never get the hint that he, well, sucks ass,” Niall digressed, sipping on his drink, raising his eyebrows in an ‘I’m not wrong’ manner.

It also doesn’t help Damien’s case that Harry is a genuinely nice guy. Aside from the battle field, Harry will go out of his way to help anyone, bringing joy and happiness to everyone around him. He’s the son of Apollo, god of the sun which makes sense since this guy basically radiates energy like he himself is the sun.

He was definitely someone she wanted to befriend, and she’s a little saddened he was part of the masses that had introduced themselves to her earlier.

“He’s right. A lot of people wish they were as good as Harry, but it sort of just comes, uh, natural to him,” Trin shrugs in agreement. Calista looks past her friends to take a look at him one more time, noticing he’s no longer sat at his table anymore.

But, then a voice speaks from right next to her, startling her and causing her to jump in her seat as she notices the guy suddenly sitting next to her. “You always know how to warm my heart Trin,” he smiles, placing his hand on his chest over where his beating muscle lies, before extending it out to the new girl.

“Hi, I’m Harry.”

Never mind, she’s happy again.

Calista takes his hand now, shaking it with a response of her name, all but falling in love with him immediately on the spot. How is someone allowed to be this good looking? It surely must be a crime.

“How’re you liking things so far?” He asked, keeping his eyes locked on hers and a small smile on his face, as if he was always such a happy person.

Calista swallowed, “I’m adjusting.”

“Understandable. It’s easy getting used to though, especially since you already have some friends here,” he smiled kindly, bringing his hand up to brush through the few fallen strands of hair that adorned his forehead.

“Well, look who finally showed up,” another person spoke from behind her, everyone’s eyes snapping towards the direction it came from. Wren stood at the end of their table, a cynical smirk plastered on her face as a bored looking Damien stood behind her. “Nice to see you again, Newbie.”

Though the tone in her voice suggested otherwise. So, Calista called her out on it, “Is it?”

Wren scoffed, rolling her eyes dramatically as a drawn out groan escaped her mouth. “Let me guess, they told you how I’m the biggest bitch around and that all I care about is staying at the top.”

Calista looked around at her silent friends, nodding her head in agreement, “Mm, yup.”

“Good, then we have an understanding. Don’t get in my way, and I won’t get in yours,” she grinned, placing the palms of her hands flat on the table as she leaned forward, her face about a foot away from Calista’s.

It was clear she was trying to be intimidating, her stern face probably scaring away anyone she laid her eyes on. Though, just like a few nights ago, Cal was far from scared. Something about this girl was far from threatening, so without a second thought, Calista leaned her face a bit closer, a small smirk of her own forming on her mouth.

She didn’t like bullies, and she was tired of running away from them.

“And if I do?”

Wren’s eyes lowered into slits, her smirk dropping as her upper lip nearly raised into a snarl, clearly not enjoying the fact that someone wasn’t intimidated by her.

“You’ll wish you didn’t.” And with that, she stood back up, skimming her eyes over Calista again before walking away, grabbing Damien by the wrist dragging him away from his little glare-off with Harry.

“Wow…” Niall, spoke up, looking around to his friends, “I hate them.”

“Oh my gods!” Trin gasped, pulling on her friend’s hands, tugging her nearly halfway across the table. “Lis, we’ve got Leaderships in a few weeks, you’re gonna beat her.”

Calista looked to her Trinity in confusion, scrunching her eyebrows together as to what the fuck she was talking about. “Um, what’s Leaderships?”

“It’s basically just ranking everybody in order of first line of defense to last,” Niall explained.

“So, Harry here is the best male, and Wren takes pride in being the best female, but, I think with a couple weeks of good training, you can knock her right off that fucking pedestal of hers,” Trin continued, smiling with excitement and shaking Calista’s hands vigorously.

It was a tempting offer. Being new and being the best sure had its perks. But, even though she can’t stand the girl, Calista can’t see herself surpassing Wren. That girl has probably trained her whole life to be where she is, there’s no way a new girl, who didn’t even know this place existed a couple days ago, can sweep in after a few weeks and take that position.

It was tempting, but it was near impossible.

“Trin, I don’t think that’s gonna be possib--”

“A few days ago you didn’t even think this was possible, yet here we are. Anything is possible, plus with help from us, and the fact you’re mother is the goddess of battle strategy, you’re destined to be the best. Right guys?” she turned to the two guys who were caught up in their own conversation, not paying attention to a thing she said.

Niall yelped in pain, his shin burning from the ferocious kick Trin delivered to him. “Wha’ was that for?!”

“Trin, why don’t you just beat her?”

She scoffed at the question in return, “I’ve tried. The bitch is a fucking cheater though, nearly sliced my achilles tendon in two.”

“So--”

“But, it’s time someone else takes a hold of that precious title of hers,” Trin finished, letting go of her friend’s hands now.

“She’s right,” Harry spoke from beside them, looking away from them and to the corner the couple had resided back into. “Both of them think they run the fucking world, and it’s getting t’be a bit sickening.”

Looking back at the curly haired girl, he smirked, sitting up just a bit straighter, “Whaddya say, love, wanna be the best?”

The first thought that popped into Calista’s mind though, was how the fuck did her life change so much?

#HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED!#mythology series #harry styles series #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles au #harry styles x ofc #harry styles writing #harry styles smut #harry styles blurb #harry styles soft #1d fanfiction #1d fanfic #one direction fanfiction #harry styles

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bokunoheroanalysisforthefuture · 3 years

Text

Chapter three! I already skimmed through it and just. Holy fuck I’m falling in love with this series all over again, and this is just the opening arc, how the hell is this so good??? I’m genuinely just in awe and fuck is it making it hard to decide where to have a cut-off point for this chapter. I suppose we’ll just have to see what fate decides.

(Also, the temptation to just paste in all of the last three pages of the chapter is so incredibly strong, you don’t understand.)

[No. 3 - Entrance Exam]

We start off with some exposition: UA’s hero course is designed to give students all they need to go pro, and is the toughest and most popular hero course in the country, with only a 1 in 300 acceptance rate. Discounting the four slots that are recommendation students, that’s 36 slots a year, which is about…

Yeah. That’s a lotta applications, and that’s just for the hero course!

Several alumni are mentioned: All Might, who declined the people’s choice award; Endeavor, who’s stopped more crimes than anyone else in recorded history; and Best Jeanist, who’s won the Best Jeanist award eight years running. (One of these things is not like the other~ One of these things just doesn’t belong~) The exposition suggests that graduating from UA is basically a requirement for becoming a great hero - something which we’ll learn soon enough isn’t quite true.

But yeah, Endeavor with the record for crime handling, even above All Might. Quite the impressive hero, though that face…

Not precisely reassuring.

So yeah, Izuku here mentions the date of the exam - February 26th. I figure that this has to be a Sunday, for the simple fact that Japan has a slightly different school schedule than us. Most notably: Japanese schools (some of them, anyways) have 5.5 day school weeks. Yes, that means the first half of Saturday can still be a school day.

While I couldn’t confirm for sure whether this is more common among the higher end schools, I feel like a school like UA, with its ‘Plus Ultra’ motto, would definitely be a school to have a half-day (or even a full day) on Saturdays, and since they also have to accomodate for middle schools that have Saturday morning classes, I figure that it would make the most sense for UA to schedule this exam on a Sunday.

The benefits of this, as we’ve already seen, is that we can then narrow down the timeline for the rest of the series, just based on that single, confirmed date. We know from the last chapter that the Sludge Villain had to happen on a Thursday or Friday of the first week of school (April 14th/15th), with the first training session two days later (the 16th/17th). But what this also gives us is when Izuku’s first year of UA starts, AND the possible years it could start on.

Since we see the glowing baby is in a modern hospital, we can assume that’s correlated to about our times. Give it a few generations, and we can guess that we’re in the 2200s or 2300s for the current era. Based on that assumption, we get the following years that have February 26th on a Sunday:

23rd century potential years: 2204, 2209, 2215, 2226, 2232, 2237, 2243, 2254, 2260, 2265, 2271, 2282, 2288, 2293, 2299

24th century potential years: 2310, 2316, 2321, 2327, 2338, 2344, 2349, 2355, 2366, 2372, 2377, 2383, 2394, 2400

As a side note, when I got into the series, my brain weirdly latched onto the idea that this had to all be happening in the year 2317. I don’t know why I decided on that number, but that’s what I rolled with, and hilariously I could be RIGHT about the year the current manga arc is happening in, provided Izuku’s first year is in 2316. Sometimes you just know, ya know? I know at least one other friend made these calcs independently of me and chose to run with 2237, which is totally valid! Probably makes more sense to be in the 2200s, but there’s room depending on how much time one thinks has passed.

As for when Izuku’s high school school year starts, we know that Japanese schools start on the second Monday of April. Since we don’t know if this is a leap year or not, we’ll end up with two dates, but that’s fine!

Feb 26 (Sun) -> Feb 27 (Mon) -> March (6/5, 13/12, 20/19, 27/26) -> April (3/2, 10/9)

Therefore, Izuku’s first day of classes (not counting the orientation, which I’ve seen a few other timelines assume is on the Sunday before classes start) is April 10th (or the 9th if a leap year)! I know this is all in the future from this chapter, but still, I wanted to share this at some point and figured now was as good a time as always.

Math!

Sorry, I’ve just wanted to share this math I did for a while now, I put a lot of work into it and I am very proud of it. Let’s get back to the chapter.

So Izuku lives a 40 minute train ride away from UA, and has made it just in time for the exam. Apparently, this is only the practical portion? Or well, that’s the part that gets focused on in this chapter, with no mention of the paper exam. I would imagine they’d be the same day, though? But I suppose one can do whatever they like with it.

He’s standing there looking at the school, thinking about how he didn’t have a chance to test the power, while the other students head in-

Excuse me, Toga?? I know that hairstyle is just a bit off, but… ???

...right, anyways. Izuku is wondering whether the hair really did anything (also, it was apparently sour, which, ew.) Katsuki comes up behind him and tells him to move aside.

Truly a flattering image. Izuku panics a bit and greets him, but Katsuki just walks by without another word or gesture, leaving Izuku confused as he watches him head on into the building. The narrative notes that since the villain incident, Katsuki hadn’t bothered Izuku, while the unnamed characters in the background apparently recognize Katsuki from the ‘sludge’ incident (well, not shocked how the fandom held onto that name).

Izuku notes that he’s gotta stop flinching instinctively, and then tries to hype himself up, noting that it’s not like before, and think about the past ten months while taking a wobbly step forward- and then tripping over himself.

I’m sorry Izuku just has so many fantastic faces in this chapter I am crying trying to limit myself to just a few. But yeah, that little derp as he realizes what’s happening is adorable, especially while Ochako gently sets him back on his feet. She mentions that it’s her quirk, and apologizes for using it, but that it’s a bad omen to trip and fall. (I wonder if that gets played with again during later parts of the series… will have to check to see.)

While Izuku freaks out over talking to a girl, Ochako notes that the exam is nerve-wracking, and then heads off while wishing both of them luck as Izuku stares after.

This fucking kid. I love him so much. His flustered excitement gets him some weird looks from the others still outside.

We transition to a new character (Present Mic) who immediately shows off his performative side by calling for a ‘hey!’ which… is met with silence from the crowd. He doesn’t let this throw him off, instead letting them know that he’ll present the guidelines for the practical, followed with a ‘YEAH!’ that gets met with an even heavier silence.

Izuku and Katsuki are seated next to each other, with Izuku descending right into excited muttering over Present Mic and how he listens to his radio show every week. Also with the assumption that all the UA teachers are pro heroes, which I mean, true, but still. Katsuki tells Izuku to shut up.

Present Mic explains the test: ten minute long ‘mock cityscape maneuvers’, with the applicants split among seven arenas, labelled ‘A’ through ‘G’. With more than 10k applicants total, that’s about…

Yeah, more than 1500 per arena. Fucking hell, no wonder the robots deplete so quickly in only a few minutes. Also of interest:

“Bring along whatever you want.” So technically, if Izuku were able to procure the tech and training to handle the robots, there would be nothing keeping him from getting into UA quirkless… though I imagine any kid who gets in mostly on tech probably gets side-eyed… though if said kid made their OWN tech, they might also get an offer from the Support department.

(AU where Mei accidentally took the heroics exam and got a shitload of points, but she ended up taking the offer for Support instead despite setting the record for most points in said exam. Katsuki forever wants to fight her. Izuku and her are good friends.)

Also, another thing I love is how Katsuki just told Izuku to shut up a moment ago, and then:

He’s the one to initiate conversation on the details of the test, basically agreeing on the reasoning behind dividing up the students between arenas. Katsuki is annoyed at not being able to crush Izuku, which has Izuku awkwardly silent.

Also mini-Mic.

Poor, poor Mic. He just wants audience participation. Anyways, he continues on to explain the points system, with the help of cute little Mario-themed silhouettes. There are three kinds of faux villains, with different points awarded for defeating each based on their difficulty levels. Also, attacking other examinees is prohibited!

A student (cough Tenya) raises their hand to ask a question, going on to note that the handout sheet appears to have four varieties of villain, and that such a blatant error (if it is one) reflects poorly on Japan’s top academy. He then spins around and points at Izuku, calling him out for his muttering and how distracting he’s been, and that ‘if this is some sort of game to you, then please leave immediately!’

Is that… Mineta seated behind Izuku? I can’t find another panel that disproves that theory, so. Whelp. If you ever for some reason want to have Izuku accidentally deal with the grape early, he’s right there.

Anyways, Present Mic brings the convo back to the initial question/comment, noting that the fourth villain is worth zero points, and is more of an obstacle. He then brings up Super Mario Brothers, the old retro game, and compares the Zero Pointer to a thwomp. There’s one per site, serving as a gimmick that’ll rampage in close quarters. Tenya thanks Mic and apologizes for the interruption.

And so we get our final words from Present Mic:

??? either he's referencing the original guy (which I think would be a misquote because I doubt OG Nap ever noted anything like that) or some French hero or the like who took on the name.

Discord offered this to me while putting together the post:

So there you have it. Tentatively confirmed.

Those EYES man, dude’s got the Rinnegan going on.

Honestly, I have to end on this panel just because of that last line from Present Mic. Like, look me in the eyes and tell me this isn’t the exact point to end on.

The discord’s takeaway from this:

#chapter 3 #opening arcs #readthrough #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #uraraka ochako #yamada hizashi #iida tenya #I seriously cannot believe they actually said 'break a leg' while Midoriya Izuku was in the area #like talk about tempting fate #and that little bow #like 'yes sir i will do my best to break a leg'#'in fact i will break both legs AND an arm'#'Plus Ultra!'

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septembersghost · 3 years

Note

for the reverse unpopular opinion meme ummm vanessa/ethan and elena gilbert in general <3

c r y ♥♥♥

Vanessa/Ethan, where do I begin? idk how to capture this well and succinctly! they’re a pairing that I didn’t EXPECT to captivate me so much, and then they quickly turned so many of their initial tropes inside out. you think she’s this mysterious, perhaps slightly aloof, determined Lady, and he’s the masculine, American, gunslinger with a troubled past - their first interaction, when he's sort of glib, calls her “darlin’,” and she just READS HIM, and then he asks, “You have a name?,” and she replies, “Yes,” with that enigmatic smile and walks away! then it’s like - actually, she is boundlessly empathetic and frighteningly perceptive, and she’s suffered horrific trauma, but it doesn’t define her, and she forges on through the dark, and he admires her for it. he is fascinated and impressed by her, and he’s wildly loving and surprisingly soft and not closed-minded (about her intellect, about the existence of the demimonde, about the tasks ahead of them). they’ve both suffered abuse, had their entire families stripped from them, both been beset by violence and darkness, some of their own making, and they’re drawn together electrically and yearningly. they both ache for a place to belong. (also, the Iconique bi aspect of the two of them, and never once do they judge each other for all that they know and uncover about their true selves. Dorian being infatuated by both of them? he’s ~problematic~, but you can’t say he doesn’t have taste). they both have monstrous aspects, yet in one another nearly find salvation. (that he says to her: “We are not like others. We have claws for a reason.” and she says to him: “Whatever you have done, whoever you have made yourself, I'm here to accept you. We're together for a reason.” I---!!!!) the fact that he manages to drive the demon back when she’s so terrifyingly possessed. when she asks if she can sleep in his room because she’s afraid, and you realize they give one another safe harbor. EVERYTHING in “Little Scorpion” when they go to the moors together. (has chopping down a tree ever been more symbolically loving? the discussion about their childhood fears! the fact that he teaches her to shoot, and she teaches him to dance! the way they fall into easy, comfortable patterns together, despite their terror and sadness. “Do you ever think what it would be like, to be like other people?” “Normal people? I try not to.” the score used for their waltz is one of my favorite pieces of music from the soundtrack.) the prompt said to not talk about missed potential which is HARD with them (the Wolf of God/protector thing was such a cool concept), but what we got on screen was so beautifully matched, they were like watching a dance, in and out of the shadows and light, magnetically drawn together, wishful and wistful. they both longed for connection and safety desperately, they were tender to one another in a world where they’d been brutalized (and it had “made us brutal in return”). that dream she’s forced to see at the end of S2 being suffused with warmth, and knowing how much she craves it, and seeing her turn it down for the sake of her own soul. the letter he writes to her tearing my heart out. (“your many kindnesses I will always carry with me. such generosity has not been a part of my life, and I thank you for your affection and understanding. in my most frightened and lonely moments, you were there, and such light you brought to me.” ARE YOU KIDDING, THIS IS MY WEAKNESS.) the IMPECCABLE Gothic Romance vibes of it all. it is very hard to effectively capture that and not lean too far into melodrama or to not feel like a facsimile of other Romantic couples, and especially since Penny Dreadful utilized characters and stories from preexisting media, they could’ve fallen into that, but never did for me. maybe because Vanessa and Ethan were both original characters? but the writing for them, the way they were more mirrors than they were opposites, the quiet and peace and understanding they found in one another, the way they became found family (the found family aspect of Penny Dreadful in general is a LOT) and never-quite-lovers, a missed breath away from their hearts being joined. I love them both so much and I’m sad about them forever.

***

ELENA, my best girl, my forever girl. I love Elena for a lot of the same reasons I love Dean, I can’t actually acknowledge her without saying that? they are closely related for me and have a lot of trait overlap. Dean was a part of my life for four years before Elena was, and Elena is actually another flickering flame that came into my world at the absolute lowest, ugliest point. seeing her as this young woman who is floating in grief, and yet still shines as a beacon of humanity with a recklessly brave and loving heart. her depression is really important to me and it gets dismissed or twisted a lot by people who unfairly decided to hate her, but it’s such an important aspect of her and about the way she’s moving though her life and coping. she is so compassionate, yet also able to be cruel and knife’s edge sharp. she suffers and is allowed to show that, to feel it. we see her begin to wake up out of the haze of loss and we see how many times she traverses the edges of it. she’s clever and tactical, but also makes impulsive decisions. she struggles and she’s self-sacrificing, to her detriment at times, and often despite others’ demands and even manipulations. she’s loyal, yet cunning. she’s radiant in a way that enthralls and draws in those around her, including the monsters (especially the monsters), and she herself is seduced by that other of the world. they say she’s a “special girl,” but it’s not because she’s a doppelgänger, she is NEVER a copy of a copy, she is fiercely her own. it isn’t her magical blood that makes her special, it’s her essence and the spark that makes her who she is. she got to be ruthless at times, she lashed out, she broke down (the scene where she burns the house down is inscribed in my brain, and it’s been years now since I rewatched TVD), but she also exuded joy and hope. she’s just so, so human and so made of love - its goodness and its darkness (again, the Dean parallels). and Elena has one of the most important lines from a show that has always stayed with me - her version of “I do my best to be brave” - “I’ll survive. Somehow I always do.” it isn’t valiant and it isn’t even remarkable, per se. it’s laced with sadness. yet she survives and withstands and keeps her heart open anyway. she always comes back to herself.

(Vanessa and Elena are without QUESTION two of my absolute favorite heroines of all-time, and there’s a whole other analysis I could do regarding the moments when they succumb and do become those beings with teeth themselves, and yet still how it’s their souls that persevere. through everything that befalls them, I just cherish them more and hold them closer.)

#arthurwilde #letterbox #ask games #filing this #she is without limits #we have claws for a reason #i bite my tongue and torch my dreams #TRYING NOT TO WRITE TEN PAGES ABOUT EACH OF THESE TOPICS WHILE STILL DOING THEM SOME SEMBLANCE OF JUSTICE

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anthropologicalhands · 3 years

Note

r/n - i've been working on my backwards walk / there's nowhere else for me to go / except back to you just one last time / say yes before i change my mind

As Rebecca tries to be sanguine about nearing forty, seeing it as a peak rather than a slide into decay (a Naomi-fostered distortion that has proven remarkably difficult to shake), one thing that has comforted Rebecca over the last decade is that with experience, she’s learned how to handle all matter of situations with grace, simply because she’s seen them before.

Revisiting this particular situation, however, is not what she expected.

It starts with an invitation delivered to Rebecca’s house to Hebby’s fifth grade graduation. There wouldn’t be anything strange about such a thing, even after she gets over the orange-and-turquoise astronaut theme (Hebby was going through a bit of a NASA phase), were it not for the fact the invitation was also addressed to Nathaniel.

Rebecca and Nathaniel, specifically.

Still frowning and trying to ignore the weird ringing that just went through her head at the jolt of seeing hers and Nathaniel’s names juxtaposed across a piece of lurid cardstock—like they’re a unit, or something—Rebecca credits herself with just pulling her phone out and calling Darryl directly instead of diving headfirst into a panic spiral.

“Rebecca!” Darryl’s voice booms from the other end of the line, and Rebecca can’t help the reflexive grin—Darryl’s unflagging enthusiasm while raising four daughters remains nothing short than a scientific marvel. “What a surprise. How is my favorite pretzel singer?”

“Hey, Darryl. Quick question for you. I got your card—”

“Isn’t it great? Hebby picked out the colors specially.”

“I’ll bet she did. But that’s not why I was calling, actually. I was wondering if, perchance, you might have had a shortage of such eye-popping invitations?”

“What do you mean?”

“My invitation was addressed to me and Nathaniel, which, I can definitely send him the deets, no problem, but wouldn’t an email be easier?”

“Oh?” She can hear Darryl’s mustache frown from the other end of the phone. “You mean you and Nathaniel aren’t…”

“Well, he doesn’t live here,” snaps Rebecca, a little flustered. “Why would you think that? Why did you think—did he—”

“Hang on,” says Darryl, and she can hear him calling for April, leaving her stuttered rejection hanging.

Are her and Nathaniel—

How is that even a question anymore?

It’s been a decade, and everyone involved with that event has definitively moved forward with their lives. Her and Josh were a definitive ‘no’ from that fateful Valentine’s Day onwards, remaining dear friends instead, and she was very much the ‘cool aunt’ among his own children. Her and Greg had wavered briefly for a bit afterwards, ran into some seriously uncomfortable friction, and it took them the better part of two years to find a good balance. It probably helped that she accidentally connected him to the woman who would become his wife, but that was a story for another day.

And it was a similar story with Nathaniel. He went to Guatemala for two years, came back and split his time between helping at MountainTop and working with some volunteer legal capacity with the local zoos and her and him—

Ah. Well.

Okay, so it wasn’t quite as clearly defined with Nathaniel, beyond the general fact that she wanted him to be happy, and he wanted her to be happy, and generally their relationship since his return had been checking in on each other, making fun of their weird hobbies and still showing up to events that were important to each other. It was all very adult and friendly and open. Their friendship had appropriate limits and boundaries and they supported each other in the respective relationships they had tried over the years, and it was very platonic…

Well. Except when it wasn’t. There hadn’t been a repeat of the Mona incident ever, and Rebecca could honestly say that she really liked a couple of the long-term girlfriends he’d introduced to them since then, and was genuinely regretful when those relationships ended. Especially for Sylvia, the LA Zoo curator who had to move for her career. Not that the regret wasn’t complicated by other factors, like when Nathaniel had admitted privately to Rebecca later that as much as he liked Sylvia, he just couldn’t see himself leaving California again.

She didn’t get butterflies at that, exactly, because but there had been a comfort in knowing that Nathaniel was content to remain in her orbit.

Again, not entirely uncomplicated. But it was nothing beyond the usual messy spectrum of human emotion internally, and never acted on externally.

She’s dated on and off as suited her libido and her schedule and her desire to find a life partner. She’s had relationships that got serious enough to talk about the future on and off, but they’ve all ended too for reasons inherent to those dynamics themselves. Nathaniel had been a good friend while they were going on, and a shoulder to cry on after, and well, okay, they might have fallen back into bed together a few times over the years, but they never pretended that it was either more than it was or that it was some forbidden thing that wouldn’t happen again. It was what it was.

Well. And they hung out, sometimes. And occasionally were each other’s plus-ones to public events. And friends’ weddings. And quite possibly—

Hm.

It really, really doesn’t help her case that she’s going to see him tonight, either.

“Rebecca?” Darryl tears her out of her thoughts. “Sorry about that! I think there was just a mistake at the stationary shop and they put your cards in together. What are the odds? I might need to call the other parents on the list, just to make sure that they got theirs all right. Could you take that one to Nathaniel? I don’t know if it’s out of your way—”

“Not at all!” says Rebecca, smiling with all of her teeth even though Darryl can’t see her, her cheeks aching. “Not even remotely.”

“Good,” says Darryl, and she can hear him beaming from the other side of the line.

“So, a funny thing happened on the way to your apartment…”

“That’s ominous,” comments Nathaniel, taking the bag of groceries she shoves at him without complaint as he closes the door behind her. Rebecca kicks off her shoes and toes them out of the walkway, abiding by Nathaniel’s still oft-repeated entreaties to not leave her personal belongings strewn entirely across his apartment.

“It’s not ominous so much as luminous,” says Rebecca, reaching into her purse and withdrawing Hebby’s invitation with a little flourish of the wrist. “Well, fluorescent.”

“Oh my god.”

Nathaniel accepts the card and flicks it open, scanning through the cheerful, only slightly grammatically incorrect message, and cannot quite suppress an amused huff of laughter. Rebecca hides her own smile as she turns away to set her purse on the very useful hook Nathaniel installed for her own use. Like herself, Nathaniel has a soft spot for Hebby, despite his continued awkwardness around children.

“Right? She gets that from Darryl for sure.”

“I don’t know, I remember someone showing up in some pink and purple eyesore into a law firm the very first day I met her.”

“You just didn’t know fun when you saw it,” says Rebecca instead, perching on the edge of the couch. “But it was funny. I was worried for a second that he thought that we were a couple or something. How weird is that?”

She is completely, totally casual in her delivery of that line, she knows. A decade in community theater and singing gigs have certainly finetuned her ability to turn a phrase, if nothing else. But something must be slightly offkey, because Nathaniel snaps up from marveling at the card to eye her suspiciously.

“Very weird,” he says, after a slightly-too-long pause. “Do we seem like a couple? Why would we seem like a couple when we aren’t a couple?”

“That’s exactly what I thought!” She punches him companionably on the arm; apparently too hard, if the way he winces and rubs at his bicep is any consideration.

(She’s been taking workout classes with Valencia—she deserves something for all that pain.)

“But it’s probably nothing,” she adds, determined to address this weird little misstep directly, because they are both too old to be having any kinds of weird misunderstandings anymore. “We’re close. We have our own rhythm, our own special two step. No wonder Darryl got confused.”

“He’s getting old,” says Nathaniel.

“Dude, c’mon.”

“What? It’s true.”

“What about you, Mister Gray?” Rebecca challenges. Nathaniel pulls a face in response, clearly fighting the urge to brush his hand through the aforementioned silvering at his temples.

(He wasn’t quite vain enough to dye his hair yet, though Rebecca credits his restraint to the fact that she would never let him hear the end of it.)

“It’s just a couple of hairs,” he says inconsequentially, as though it hasn’t been long established that between the two of them, he’s the one with the greater fear of aging, and therefore in far more danger of aging gracelessly.

“Keep telling yourself that.” Rebecca hops off the couch and grabs him by the elbow. “Now c’mon, let’s make sure make these sweet potatoes are not oh-sweet-pies-don’t!”

Heading over to Nathaniel’s place had left Rebecca feeling on edge, not quite sure how to process the idea of someone, anyone, considering her and Nathaniel as a potential couple this late in the game.

Nothing is more grounding, however, than seeing Nathaniel being clearly so off kilter, missing steps in what should be a well-worn dance of theirs by now. Dancing has always been their thing—where they once threw each other off at every possible moment, shaking up their convictions about life and happiness and how that concept could exist within their previously compartmentalized existences. Now, they were familiar with each other. Comfortable. Predictable.

They knew each other’s moves now, which means that she could see Nathaniel’s as clear as water.

He’s unfocused during dinner, a little erratic in his answers, jittery, as if he’s had too much coffee. It’s putting her off her rhythm, and while she knows that not everything in life needs to be a big song and dance production, there does need to be some kind of continuity.

This evening was supposed to be easygoing and relaxing. And, yes, probably beneficial in that very particular friends-with-benefits way. But since that clearly wasn’t going to happen, they needed to execute a sharp left turn and get this all settled.

“Nathaniel?” she repeats, for the third time.

“Hm?”

“Are you getting hard of hearing in your old age?” He scowls deeply at her in response. “Yeah, yeah, I had to ask. So, what’s bugging you?”

He’s silent for a long minute. “Just something ridiculous.”

“Yeah?”

He shakes his head. “We don’t need to go through it again. It’s just spinning in circles around the same old subject.”

“Try a jazz square then.”

That startles a laugh out of him, much to Rebecca’s satisfaction. Good to know that she still has some capacity for surprise with him. She continues, “You know that move, right? Don’t tell me you forgot about Connie.”

“Are you kidding? I still have nightmares about her scarf strangling me to death.”

“Dark.”

“She was terrifying.”

“Yeah.” They sit in companionable silence. Then Nathaniel sighs.

“Sorry I’m being weird. I just…hearing that from you, I always thought it would just be a good laugh. You know, ridiculous to even think about romance again. But it made me feel weird instead, so now I’m acting slightly weird.”

“I wouldn’t say slightly,” teases Rebecca, unable to resist. Nathaniel doesn’t return her smile.

“Rebecca, I like where we are. I like that our relationship isn’t a big production anymore.”

“Don’t get me wrong—I love drama on the stage, but that’s definitely where it should stay.” She drums her fingers on her thigh, subconsciously tapping out a tune that’s been giving her trouble these last few weeks. “We can learn new steps, you know. Old dogs, new tricks? That doesn’t only apply to the bedroom.”

Nathaniel (again, predictably) groans.

“Aren’t you getting too old to have such a dirty mind?” But he’s smiling, now.

“Nah. I fully intend to be a filthy old woman. But seriously,” she adds, moving to sit besides him on the couch. “If just the thought of other people thinking that we’re a couple again is enough to send us both off balance, we need to center ourselves. Maybe it’s something worth talking about. What do you say?”

She reaches out and grabs his hand, and starts to tap a rhythm against his large palm—one of the first she ever composed, the first one her friends ever danced to. After a moment, he taps back, completing it.

“Yes.”

#writing meme reply #rebecca x nathaniel #crazy ex girlfriend #ellie writes fic #I'm not sure how happy i am with the denouement of this one #and it spun away a bit from the prompt #but i like enough of it #it's been forever since i've written fic #notbang

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royallyprincesslilly · 4 years

Text

Title: Love, Maybe? {38}*

Chris Evans X Reader OFC Vixen Giovanni

Warning: Cursing, Plot, Heavy Angst, Mild NSFW

Word Count: 4.1K

Summary: After a night of drunkenness you wake up next to warm, hot as hell body, a migraine and no memory of the night before. When you come to realize that the hot body belongs to none other than Hollywood’s golden boy Chris Evans you freak out. As events unfold you become even more panicked to find out you got married in your drunken haze. What else is there to do but get it annulled, right? Before walking away, you share one more night of molten kisses and passion. Three years later you are still living with the repercussions of your brash decisions, but the surprises don’t stop there. The past has a way of coming back and have you questioning is this fate that you’ve been running from, hell could it have been love, maybe?

NOTE: **Italic texts is an inner Vixen thought. Bold Italic texts is an inner Chris thought.

**Loosley Edited/Proofread**

**Slightly Interactive***

Thank you guys for reading!!!! If you enjoyed this please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG. 😊❤❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 38: Reality Check

-Chris-

“No, don’t do that sweetheart, you’ll fall in.”

From what he knew about her already he knew she wasn’t going to listen. Sure enough, she leaned forward over the wooden path trying to reach something in the water and sure enough, she tumbled headfirst into the water. He couldn’t help but laugh as he ran to her.

“Really Christopher, you laugh at your daughter?”

“I told her not to do it.” She popped her head up laughing up a storm. “See, she finds it funny.” When he looked at you, you were shaking your head.

“Not funny, she could have drowned.”

“Oh stop it, she can swim.” He plopped her onto the blanket on the shore and sat.

“I otay mama.” She grabbed two strawberries and munched them as he wrapped her in a towel.

The three of you sat and ate the picnic lunch you’d so expertly made and enjoyed the sunshine and the beauty of the day. When he’d brought up showing Ella the lake you reassured him it was a great idea. The way she loved water it would have been a waste not to show her. She loved it. She splashed and was even able to swim around thanks to the calm waters. They’d played together, and she climbed all over him having him pretend to be a tree then a giraffe and finally a water horse. It was great being with her.

With each passing day, she gave him more and more confidence with his parenting and let him get closer and closer. Now she didn’t just run to you for comfort or when she was feeling shy, she ran to him and asked for him. It overjoyed him. He hoped she could tell how much he wanted her, how much it meant to be her dad.

After she ate, she whined for the whole thirty minutes she had to wait to get back in the water. Once the time was up she ran away heeding your warnings to not go too far. He watched you lean back onto your elbows then look to him.

“What?” He shook his head and continued eating his apple.

“Uh no, that was a clear something look. What is it?”

“It’s nothing. You just—I like what you’re wearing.” He really liked it. The two-piece wasn’t skimpy but it wasn’t modest either.

“You like what I’m wearing?”

“Yeah, orange is a good color on you.” He wasn’t lying, it was true. It complimented your skin and made you even more gorgeous.

You snorted and smiled. “Thanks.”

“No, thank you.” He looked to Ella in the water and he could feel your eyes roam his body. He decided to give your moment to gawk. When he looked to you, you were laid back with the sun beaming down on you. The sun loved you.

“Come pway mama, da-da.”

“Coming baby.” You stood and walked toward the shore where she sat but he didn’t move.

“You’re not coming?” You looked back at him. He was enjoying the view too much to get up.

“No, I am, just—enjoying the view.” Your jaw dropped as you looked at him making him smile.

“Watch it.”

His laughter was loud. Tossing the apple to the side, he ran to you and wrapped his arm around your waist and carried you the rest of the way to Ella.

The three of you played in the water and laughed and screamed to your heart’s content. He used his muscle to manhandle you and Ella and she loved every second of it. Every time he tossed Ella into the air he could literally see your heart leap into your throat. It was hilarious. You had to know he would always catch her.

When Ella got tired of playing with the two of you she went off to the shore and played in the mud and collected rocks. She could easily entertain herself. It left the two of you slightly alone a few times. He knew you didn’t want to give Ella any confusing visuals so for the majority of the time your interactions were flirtatious but never overtly inappropriate. He tested boundaries by slyly touching you here or there but always remained respectful. After a little while, it was like a game of who could touch the other without being obvious. He was wining, you were still a giant ball of mystery with how you held yourself reserved all the time. It drove him insane. He wanted to know how you felt.

~~~~~~~~~~~

-Vixen-

You opened your eyes to see both Chris and Ella peacefully sleeping. A little after midday the three of you took a nap in the boathouse. You were the first to wake evidently. Chris was laying on his back with one arm across his forehead and of course, that was the position Ella was in. you smiled at yet another similarity. He couldn’t deny her if he wanted to. It was clear he didn’t want to. Rather than running from any responsibility, he was steadily piling more and more on. He wanted her. if he was to be believed he wanted you too.

Sighing, you stood and carefully walked out and onto the wooden planks and gazed out over the water and the orange glow of the sun on the water. This place was beautiful, and you were going to miss it when you went back to LA, and then San Francisco. You sat and dipped your feet into the water and for the first time thought about going back to reality. It was easy to mistake LA for your reality, but it wasn’t, San Francisco was. How was this little family thing going to work then?

When you felt him behind you, you didn’t jump or feel any alarm, your body was used to his presence. You took a deep breath when you felt his lips press to your neck then your shoulder and you couldn’t suppress the moan that escaped.

“Do you know that you two sleep just alike?”

“We do?” You nodded and again he kissed your neck.

“It’s cute. You have an actual mini you. She looks, laughs, sleeps and eats like you. Her sweet tooth is uncontrollable another thing you share, and God her eyes. Kristella was the right name for her.”

“It’s surreal,” he responded then kissed your shoulder. “Today was great, right?”

“It was. She loved it. Good call.” He began tracing lazy patterns in your skin and you settled back into him and enjoyed the perfectness of the day.

The silence between you stretched as did the comfort.

“I’m so happy and grateful to get a second chance not only to be Ella’s father but with you. Thank you.”

Looking over your shoulder you met his eyes and searched them trying to find any hint of a lie, any hint that he was lying but once your eyes met you knew he wasn’t. Your heart fluttered yet again forcing you to take a deep breath.

“Why couldn’t you have been this way three years ago?” Chris shook his head and a look of remorse washed across his face.

“I was stupid, a dick who couldn’t see what was right in front of me.”

“Which was?”

“The woman of my dreams. Everything I didn’t know then I wanted, everything I wasn’t ready to see. I’m ready now Vixen. I know it might be too little too late, and reap what you sow, and I agree. Honestly, I deserved to lose you back then. As much as it hurts to accept; you were right. I wasn’t ready, not for this or—you. I would have screwed it up, I would have hurt her.”

His candor shook you. it shook you so much that you had to look away or else you’d say something you couldn’t take back. His hand on your chin stops you forcing you to not only keep contact with his eyes but to also full on face him. When you were fully turned sitting on his lap with his arms securely wrapped around you holding you against him you knew what was going to happen before it did.

“I’m sorry for hurting you. I regret it on my long list of regrets. I’m ready to be her father, I’m ready to be in her life, ready to step up in any and every way you want. After seeing your world in San Francisco, I know you don’t need me, you don’t need my money, my influence, my connections or lifestyle. I know you can honestly take me or leave me, but I am ready for you and everything I opted out of three years ago, everything I felt and saw but ran from. I want to be in your life.”

He took a breath and searched your face before he continued.

“You’re so hard to read all the time it really gives me anxiety. I have no idea what you want, how you feel, if you feel anything. Tell me, please.”

You crash your lips to his and kiss him with every emotion you felt. You didn’t want to talk, not with your mouth as least. There had to be a way to answer him, to show him. as you kissed him he kissed you back. You kept your moan low while your hands traveled down to his swim trunks. You unlaced them and freed his straining cock. When your eyes met he saw your intention, he knew what came next and he didn’t protest, he just pulled you down onto his need and laid back onto the wooden planks. Hopefully this was enough for him, hopefully he could hear what your mouth didn’t say.

-Chris-

As he looked out over his backyard he smiled at his family and yours. This was a long way from the first time they got together. Now everyone was laughing, talking and genuinely looked to be enjoying themselves. As he flipped the meat on the grill he smiled and finished his beer. He found you in the crowd laughing with his sisters at the same moment you looked over to him. your smile turned bashful before you bit your bottom lip. That bottom lip drove him crazy and would probably be the death of him. You looked away and went back to your conversation.

“How’s everything over here, son?” your father approached him and looked at the meats on the grill.

“Good, sir. Another few minutes and they’ll be ready to come off.”

“All right sounds good. How are you doing?”

“Good. Are you doing okay sir?”

“I’m good, just wondering when you’re going to tell my daughter you’re hopelessly in love with her.”

He nearly choked on his beer. What’d you say to that?

“Uh, well sir,” he cautiously began.

“You can call me Carmine, we’re family.”

He smiled and nodded. “I appreciate that Si—Carmine.”

“So talk to me. Why haven’t you told her yet?”

“It’s complicated.”

“Why? Yes I know she can be intimidating and appear cold and closed off but I assure you, it’s an act.”

He smiled because hearing that made him feel a lot better for some reason. It meant that you weren’t that way with just him. if your family saw it too you were this way with them too.

“How uh, how exactly do I work around that?”

“Simple. Trust. Show her she can trust you. if you get that squared away then the rest comes easy,” Carmine assured.

“I think I already fractured that trust.”

“What’re you doing about it?”

“Trying to rebuild it. I have no idea it’s even working. She’s still so distant,” he confided.

“I’m sure it’s working. The thing with Vixen is she has the best poker face, but with every poker face, there is a tell.”

“What are her tells?”

“Her actions. If her words say one thing or nothing but her actions are clearly speaking then I’d follow her actions. Like with her giving you more and more freedom with Ellie Bellie shows she trusts you with her. you found a way to lower her fierce mama bear exterior and let you in for her. I wouldn’t worry too much about it. what is meant to be will be.” Carmine leaned back and groaned as if he had not one care in the world.

“Just remember, I don’t own any guns, but I know how to kill a man with my bare hands in twenty-nine different ways if you ever hurt her.”

“Got it, sir.”

Carmine nodded and walked away leaving him with his thoughts once again. He was so lost in them he didn’t hear you come up.

“You wouldn’t last a minute in my kitchen gazing off to nowhere while precious meat was on the fire.” He smiled and looked you over.

“Precious meat huh.” You snorted and shook your head.

“You’re such a horny teenager.”

“Enjoying yourself?”

“I would be enjoying myself a ton better if you would hurry up and feed me.” Again he smiled and stepped closer to and went to your ear.

“Follow me upstairs and I’ll feed you,” he whispered. You smiled.

“You got yourself a date—later. Until then hurry up, we’re hungry.” You walked off to join everyone else.

Fifteen minutes later he brought the meat over to the table and everyone helped themselves. You made Ella a plate and he made you a plate. Conversation never died down and the laughs kept coming, it was great that everyone got along, it was what he wanted when he brought you here. He wanted his family to love you as much as he did.

The vibrating in his pocket had him groaning. He’d tried to ignore it for the last hour, but it kept buzzing and buzzing. He ignored it again and looked up to see you looking down at your phone with a confused expression.

-Vixen-

As you stared at the message from Kassius confusion filled you.

Kassius MSG: Is it true?

MSG: Is what true?

You drifted off to the side as you waited for Kassius’ reply. When his message came in it was a link. You clicked it and immediately the cover of a tabloid magazine popped up and it was you and Chris on the cover. You were sitting together in a restaurant laughing together, it was the bakery from San Francisco. The headline read “Chris Evans Bombshell, Secret Life Exposed.” Your jaw dropped and you looked up to see Chris digging his phone out his pocket with his eyes on you before he looked down to his own screen.

When you looked back to your phone you scrolled through the article. They’d uncovered your identity and even had pictures from Vegas three years ago. There were pictures of the two of you at the altar, pictures of your marriage certificate, pictures of a still from your wedding video with both of you showing off your rings. When you saw pictures Ella you freaked out.

They had it all. As you continued to skim the long article they broke the news that he’d been married for the last three years and that it was a secret. The more you read the more your confusion and alarm rose. They’d dug up where Ella was born, tried to speak to nurses and the hospital. This was invasive as fuck and you weren’t down with it.

You looked up and saw a freaked out look on Chris’ face. you saw him take a step to you, but you got another message. You were so confused as to why the article was speaking in present terms. They didn’t mention the divorce papers at all.

MSG Kassius: Channel sixty-one, right now.

You walked toward the TV that was mounted in the corner and that was when the staggered beat of TMZ came on. They were running the same exclusive.

“Again, exclusive breaking news. Chris Evans, Captain America, the man everyone loves is off the market ladies. You heard it right. These pictures that were taken a few days ago show him on an apparent date with a beautiful mystery woman. The two appear to be having a great time, but she’s not a mystery, Chris knows her well. She’s his wife. You heard right, Chris Evans is married and has been for the last three years.”

“What!” It was Lisa who shot to her feet first. All eyes went to Chris then to you and back to Chris.

“We’ve uncovered the wedding pictures, the marriage certificate, and the lady’s identity. She is Vixen Giovanni, she’s a local San Franciscan who owns a successful restaurant there and is in the works of opening the anticipated Giovanni’s here in LA. The two also share a daughter, you got it a love child who is around two years old. The timing lines up with their wild Vegas wedding.”

The only thing you heard was the blood pounding in your ears but you saw the chaos unfold around you. the parents were on their feet and the siblings were looking around and between you and Chris waiting for an explanation. You saw their lips moving and knew they were speaking but you didn’t hear any of them. You looked back to the TV and just zeroed in on the images of Ella they were plastering all over the screen and pictures of your restaurant and you through the years. It was a major invasion of privacy. Suddenly the narrative changed and the images on the screen were of the two of you in the dancehall in San Fran.

Images of you dancing together and laughing with your faces close together than kissing were everywhere. Through all of that, there was no mention of your divorce. You looked to Chris who looked stressed as fuck. When your eyes met you saw something in his eyes that didn’t sit well with you.

“Chris! What the hell are they talking about? It’s all lies right?”

When neither of you made an effort to explain they became more livid.

“Okay look wait, everyone calm down,” Chris began. Nexus took up Ella and rocked her hoping to keep her calm.

“Calm? Christopher Robert Evans, if you don’t explain!”

“It’s true.”

That was all he got out before all hell broke loose. His mother gaped at him and your mother’s jaw dropped.

“Vixen!

“Chris, I wasn’t there. We weren’t there, none of us were there to see it. how could you do this!?” Lisa looked hurt but furious.

“Chris--,” she began before she stopped.

“Maw I know, I know. I’m sorry. It was a spur of the moment thing, we were both drunk and just did it. we didn’t think about it or anything. It wasn’t a conscious decision either of us made,” he explained.

“So you married my daughter on a whim when you weren’t in your right might? She wasn’t worth a sound decision?

“Dad--,” you began attempting to smooth things out but he held his hand up to you stopping you.

“No sir, it’s nothing like that. You know what I think about your daughter. This was three years ago, we both were—look we know there’s no excuse for it and we’re sorry.” He looked to you no doubt pleading with you for help, but again you saw something in his eyes.

“Nothing to say Vixen? You got married without me there, without your mother. How could you do this?”

“Mom, everyone. Let’s take a breath. Yes, we did this and I understand how you feel. You have every right to be angry. What we did was stupid and irresponsible, we both know that, right Chris.”

He nodded.

“We should have told you guys the same time we told you about Ella. For me I knew you guys would be mad, I knew neither of you would understand and I really didn’t want to disappoint either of you because I got drunk and did something reckless. Back then you guys know I did reckless things for fun and I knew you both wouldn’t like it.”

“Same here, I should have told you. I’m sorry.”

“Wow, you married a complete stranger, then had unprotected sex with them and produced a child. My god Chris,” Lisa said as she paced the floor.

“The thing that they aren’t revealing, and I don’t understand why. We’re not married anymore. A few days after we got married we filed for divorce. We both signed the papers and handled this,” you explained.

The silence around you was the calm before the storm.

“What!” There were several voices that screamed it. It looked like that nugget made them even angrier.

“What do you mean?”

“I went to LA shortly after and we filed with Chris’ lawyer. It was taken care of.”

“So first you irresponsibly get married, irresponsibly have sex, then get a quickie divorce and decide to lie about it for three years?”

They way they said it made it sound like the two of you were children and made questionable decisions. Across the way Chris rubbed his forehead.

“Vixen, I don’t know how you could do this. You were married and you threw it away. You had a husband and now it’s all wasted.”

You were confused. She was pissed you got married and now pissed you were divorced. You couldn’t win with her.

“Actually,” Chris began. All eyes fell to him, but he avoided your eyes as he looked to be thinking about something. When his eyes met yours, you had a bad feeling.

“The reason why they didn’t break the full story is because that is the full story.”

“What?” Chris slowly walked to you, but you stepped back cautiously.

“You’re right, we signed the papers and I thought they had been filed, all this time I thought it went through but Sherman called me a few weeks ago and told me that because of some things he was going through he didn’t end up filing the papers. He went to rehab and then left LA for a while. They sat in his desk all this time. I didn’t know Vixen.”

As he spoke he kept trying to get closer, but you didn’t allow him to. A plethora of emotions filled you, shock, confusion, disbelief, hurt, anger, disappointment and a slew of other things. The one that was prevalent was hurt. He’d lied to you and kept something super important from you. something that you had every right to know. The last few weeks flashed through your head, every moment with him, every kiss, every time you slept together. It all felt manipulative now. You began to wonder if he had an agenda this whole time.

You didn’t know what to say, so you didn’t say anything. You walked away inside and upstairs. There you found Nexus and Ella in your room watching TV and laughing together. The minute you walked in Nexus went on alert.

“Is everything okay?”

You pasted a smile on your face and nodded. “Perfect.”

You walked to the closet and pulled out your bags and began packing them. You didn’t bother folding anything, you just threw things in not caring if they wrinkled or got ruined. you went through the room like a hurricane and just dropped everything in your bags. After twenty minutes you were done then you walked into Ella’s room and tried to keep your tears in. you packed her things and pressed the button you had that made you able to push things to the side.

When you finished you walked back into your room and scooped Ella up. “Nex, when you are leaving can you bring the rest of her things?

“What happened? What’s going on?”

“I have to go, please don’t make this a thing.” She nodded understanding you were trying to keep this as calm as possible. You walked out and down the stairs and out the front door.

“Wayo we go, mama?”

“On a trip princess.”

“Da-da come?”

“Nope, it’s just you and me, like it’s always been.”

You put the bags in the car and when you shut the trunk there was Chris coming toward you.

“Vixen wait, don’t go. Please. Please let me explain.” You ignored him and walked around the car the opposite way then opened the door and put Ella in the car seat. Throughout the whole action he continued to plead.

“You can’t just leave. What about the last few days, the weeks we’ve worked to get here. Don’t I deserve a chance to explain?”

Sliding into the passenger side you tried to shut the door but he held on to it.

“Vixen, don’t do this, I’m sorry.” You pulled it free and slammed the door then took a breath and drove off.

You had no idea where to go but you knew you couldn’t spend another minute there with him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

***If you want to be tagged please SEND AN ASK SO IT WILL BE EASIER FOR ME TO KEEP TRACK OF. Thank you for reading!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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#love maybe fic #Chris Evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans smut #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you #Chris Evans X black reader #black fanfiction #angst fanfic #slow burn fanfic

186 notes · View notes

shipersanonymous · 4 years

Text

One Hit West

Author's note:

Alright let's start with a little action. Not as long as the previous one but don't get too comfortable with the scenario cause I like to pull surprises 😏.

Also (I think this goes without saying by now) CLIFFHANGER WARNINGS APPLY!

Enjoy 😍❤️

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

[Barry]

She’s not yours.

Doom-doom.

She’s not yours.

Doom-doom.

She’s not yours.

Doom-doom.

The phrase repeats itself in his head, in time to the steady beat of his quaking heart. Her eyes, her face, her aura. It all just calls out to him. To a part inside him he didn’t realise, until this very moment, that he had. Barry has no idea what he’s feeling, but he knows that the emotion originates from a place of love…

She’s not yours.

… and pain.

Pain? Why pain?

Does he want her to be his? To be a part of him he didn’t know existed? Yes. Yes he does. But having that wish come true means taking it with the consequences.

It means that Iris lied to him. That she’s been lying to him for the past five years. That she’s kept this secret from him all this time despite knowing just how much family means to him.

It’s everything.

Having this little girl be his daughter means accepting that he hasn’t been there for her for the past five years of her life. That she’s been fatherless all this time, or worse, that some other man has been raising her instead. That someone else gets to hear her call him “dad”.

“Are you alright Mr. Allen?” her tiny voice asks, the drop of worry in it warming his heart. The maturity of her speech surprising him.

“Huh? What?” he asks, still a little disoriented by the spark of familiarity she lit in him. The little girl eyes him curiously, her head tilting cutely to the side as her sad eyes analyse him with concern behind square, purple framed glasses. Without a word she starts to wheel her way towards him.

“Baby girl-”

“It’s alright aunt Anissa. I just wanna help.”

She says sweetly and her aunt steps aside without verbal protest though her emotional conflict couldn’t be any clearer on her face.

She stops in front of him and tentatively reaches for his hand. Her little fingers hold on to his and Barry feels his eyes grow moist. He looks down at her, an astonished smile creeping onto his lips and she smiles back up at him sweetly. Then she surprises him by saying the first child-like thing since she stepped into the house:

“Do you want a hug Mr. Allen?”

Barry chuckles at the paradox. Such a simple request but it carries so much emotional weight.

“Yeah, a hug would be nice.” He answers and kneels down to her level. With a smile she opens her arms wide and he leans into her, wrapping his arms around her with a gentle urgency. She squeezes him weakly but the action comforts him and he can’t stop the single tear that streams down his cheek.

“Better?” She asks, without letting go and he nods into her shoulder.

“Much. Thank you Princess.”

She chuckles, the sound making his chest feel like the sun exploded inside it’s fragile walls of bone.

“It’s Nora.” She answers and Barry’s heart forgets to beat.

“What?” he asks, speaking through the sudden dryness in his mouth.

“Nora. My name is Nora. Nora West.” She clarifies and he pulls away slowly and looks into her eyes, his own eyes wide with disbelief.

“Nora?” He whispers the name like it’s meaning is indescribably precious. She smiles and nods innocently.

She’s not yours…

[Flashback]

The first thing Barry noticed was her smile.

It gave the dreary place a new and human warmth that the bright wallpaper and homey positioning of the furniture failed to grant the asylum. It seemed out of place yet, simultaneously, where it belonged.

From her smile and the gentle way in which she handled his mother to the sweet voice she used to spark up a one sided conversation, it all warmed his heart and for the first time ever in his 17 years of life, Barry wondered what the meaning of love was.

She caught him staring but, to his relief, she didn’t mention it. Instead she stopped his heart by aiming her other worldly smile at him. Tilting her head slightly to the side she asked:

“Hi, I’m Iris. Can I help you?”

It was all Barry could do to blink.

“Sir? Are you alright?” She took a step closer and suddenly his heart jump started, causing him to start as if suddenly awakened from a dream. The girl, Iris, jumped at his sudden reaction then analysed him with a quizzical gaze.

Barry mentally face palmed himself and begged the heavens to keep away the tint he felt creeping onto his cheeks.

“I’m sorry about that. I – uh – I was just startled to see you that’s all. I’ve never seen you here before.”

“Oh, uhm. In that case I’m the one who’s sorry. They should have told you this at the reception, I’m – uh- I’m one of the volunteers for this week.” She explained. A vague memory of the lady at the reception came to Barry’s mind but he was still disoriented by the spark of emotion she’d ignited with in him. He felt blindsided like he’d been ambushed yet he couldn’t consider Iris an enemy and every beat of his heart seemed to echo with happiness not anger. Could this really be one of destiny’s traps?

“Sir?”

Damn it! He scolded himself, he was staring again.

“Barry,” he answered and she blinked, confusion clear in her wide eyes.

“Excuse me?”

“Oh, uh” he tried to banish his embarrassment by clearing his throat then continued.

“My name, is Barry. I… think we’re about the same age so please, um, d-don’t call me sir.”

She chuckled and his heart picked up its pace. Right then and there, he knew he was a doomed man.

Where’s the ground that will open up and swallow you when you nee…?

His train of thought was interrupted by a loud bang followed by screams and the sound of panicked foot steps in the hallway. His feet suddenly felt cemented to the floor and he simply stood in the door way looking at her frightened face with his own wide eyes.

He blinked and in that moment she seemed to transform. Her panic dissolved into a calculated coolness and she stepped towards him with dedicated steps. Her hand wrapped around his wrist and his heart fluttered just as she pulled him inside and closed the door. She locked them in then looked around the room with a speculative eye. Her gaze landed on the door to the bathroom and just as she stepped towards it, the door to the bedroom rattled.

Barry felt his fear ringing in his ears and took small steps back till his foot hit the wheel on his mother’s wheel chair. He turned to look at her and her eyes were wide open. She looked petrified and the rise and fall of her chest seemed forced, like she was trying to breathe through a nightmare. That - the first sign of emotion he’d since in his mother since….

That was enough to spark him out of his paralysis and he kneeled down and held one of his mothers hands in both of his.

“It’s OK mom, I’m here. I’m here it’s OK. Focus on me, just on me.”

As if by a miracle her eyes connected with his. It was a sign that she saw him. That she knew he was there. Barry let out a breath of disbelief. For three years he wondered if he’d ever be able to see her smile again. If he’d ever hear his moms voice or even get a sign that she knew he was there. He’d spent countless hours sitting beside her in silence, watching her stare into oblivion without making the slightest movement besides to breathe. He’d longed for her to respond to his voice, to his touch, to his tears. To feel her caress his cheek and call him her “beautiful boy” again.

Time and time again he’d leave disappointed and with a heavy heart yet still he returned each week with the same hopes and prayers. And they were finally answered.

“B-B-Barry,” her voice came out a strained whisper and a single tear rolled down her pale cheeks.

“Mom,” he answered, unable to hold in his own emotions.

Another rattle interrupted their moment and Barry turned to the door in time to see Iris dart towards the bathroom door and burst it open.

“We need to hurry,” she whispered and Barry nodded.

“Hold on, mom.” He answered before sliding one arm beneath her knees and picking his mom up from her chair. He followed Iris into the bathroom and she closed the door behind her.

“I can’t lock this one, I don’t have the key.” She explained pressing her back to the door as if she could keep it closed with her own body weight.

“Barry,” his mom called out to him weakly, startling him a little. He’d grown used to her silence and almost forgotten the sound of her voice.

“It’s OK mom don’t worry. I’ll keep you safe.”

She shook her head, indicating that it’s not what she meant.

“R-run.” Her voice was raspy and weak and each word tore at his heart. He laid her down in the bathtub and held onto her hand with both of his, kissing her fingers with closed eyes as tears streamed down his cheeks.

“Please mom. Don’t over exert yourself, it’s been a while since you last spoke. And don’t try to fight me on this one. I can’t just leave you here. OK? Just save your strength, I’ll find a way get you out of here.” He replied under his breath, aware that their conversation might get them caught.

“I’m sorry Mrs Allen but I’m with Barry on this one. We can’t just leave you here.” Iris added her whispered support and Nora looked at her with heartbroken eyes.

“Fran-cine,” Mrs Allen choked out and Iris’s eyes grew wide with astonishment before she blinked and they became watery with sadness.

“No mom that’s not Mama West that’s Iris. She’s-”

“Francine’s daughter.” Iris interjected “I’m Iris West, Francine’s daughter.”

Barry’s eyes widened as he looked at her and slowly noticed the resemblance. He’d been so awe struck before that he hadn’t paid as much attention as he should have.

He looked at her, speechless, she smiled weakly and a comfortable yet intense silence took over as they simply stared at each other. Each moment sealing them deeper in an inevitable emotional fate.

The sound of splintering wood brought their focus back to the situation at hand. Loud footsteps echoed outside the door followed by a hard shove that Iris somehow managed to control.

“Stay down mom,” Barry whispered and gave her hand one last squeeze before running towards the door and adding his weight to it. The shoves kept coming, and the two of them worked together to keep the door closed.

A moment of reprieve.

A click of a gun.

A single shot.

Iris fell to ground clutching at her shoulder and howling in pain.

“Iris!” he screamed and knelt down beside her pressing onto her wound to help her stop the blood flow. In that moment of weakness, the enemy managed to kick at the door sending both of them soaring across the room (which doesn’t seem as impressive a feat when you account for the small size of the bathroom).

Barry held onto Iris and she landed against his chest. He hit his head and was out cold. But Iris, thanks to him, was still conscious. Dizzy from blood loss and the effort of being flung so violently but conscious none the less. Conscious enough to see the blurry image of men in black storming into the bathroom. To see the moment Nora was face to face with the enemies gun. To see the woman turn her face towards her and smile with a maternal warmth. She mouthed out a single word….

“Love.”

Then the gun was fired.

One shot to the forehead.

The blood bloomed, the life seeped out of her, and the heartache Iris felt was stronger than the pain from her wound but she had no strength to scream. Her lungs seemed to have been crushed by the weight of her grief and she took three labored breaths before the darkness took over.

…

[Iris]

Her hand freezes in the air, the keys jingling slightly from the left over energy. The world ceases to exist and her heart stops as she hears a familiar sound echoing from inside. Iris holds her breath and waits to confirm that she heard what she thinks she heard. That her ears aren’t deceiving her. Sure enough the sound rings through the air once again.

Her daughter’s laughter.

Like a woman risen from the dead, her heart beat sky rockets and she begins to hyperventilate. Beads of sweat pepper her forehead and neck and a slight tremble comes over her. She shakes her head in an attempt to center herself but all it does is make her dizzy. Her hand reaches for the railing around the porch as the other clutches at her chest. Breathing is hard and no matter how hard she tries, she can’t bring her mind to accept the possibility that Nora might actually be in there right now. With Barry. With her father.

Does he know?

Does she know?

Iris’s heart quickens a few beats more.

She hasn’t been this scared since that night.

Another cackle floats from inside, recapturing her attention. She needs answers. Frantically Iris, unlocks the door with shaky hands and bursts it open. She rushes in and stops dead in her tracks at the site of the scene before her. Nora is seated on Barry’s lap, her own lap covered by a bowl of popcorn and the Wizard of Oz playing out on the screen.

It’s like a scene out of her wildest dreams. Something she’s longed to see play out for years.

Then why is she so scared?

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nattapohntkp · 3 years

Text

Rhythms & Blues

Everyone may have heard of a music genre called R&B (Rhythms & Blues), but many people don't know where R&B came from. With more melodies and rhythms founded, R&B is a music genre that focuses on the lyrics, the genre of love, and playing with the right rhythm. The music is a little brighter, but still not as bright as Pop. The musical instruments are not limited in style but often use a little sound effect. R&B originated in the '40s. It evolved from the Blues that black people sang in churches to release the suffering caused by the abuse and persecution of white people. Blues music has another meaning: sorrow, depression. Therefore, Blues has mostly sad rhymes and melodies, or sounds like a singing of the prayer in a church to seek blessings from the Lord (Gospel) itself. The R&B genre is a mix of African-American music from Pop, Jazz, and Blues. As the times change, more and more R&B music has evolved and mixed with other genres. Since the 90s, R&B music has infiltrated more and more music genres to become another genre. One example is that R&B can go along with Pop music which introduce many R&B stars such as, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Jennifer Lopez, Celine Dion, Beyonce, Brian McKnight, Chris Brown, and more. It can also mix with Hip-hop music as well which appears in Afrobeat’s work. In addition to Pop and Hip-hop, artists like Davido and Wizkid blend R&B and local melodies to the mainstream.

R&B music is a music genre that can reach audiences with a wide range of rhythm, catchy content, reflecting stories. Therefore, it is the music that no matter how much the times change, R&B is a song that people still listen to.

The famous artists and their works.

1. Beyonce

Beyoncé Giselle Knowles, also known as Beyonce, became famous in the 1990s as a key member of destiny's child, the all-female R&B band of that era. In June 2003, during the suspension of Destiny's Child, she released her first solo artist with “Dangerously in Love” album. It was one of the most successful albums of that year. The album was a huge success in both sales and criticism, leading to a hit song such as “Crazy in love”. Later, Destiny's Child officially decided to disband. and she continued to work on music as a solo artist.

The examples of famous songs by Beyonce.

1. “Crazy in love” (2003) is a song that truly suitable for lovers because the content of the song says "Got me looking so crazy right now, your loves" which indicates how much you love someone until you are crazy about him and hope that he only calls your name.

2. “Listen” (2007) is a song that wants to convey other person to listen her voice and dream. Since, she has always followed others in the past but it's time for others to listen to her voice, her desire, and her dream.

2. Whitney Houston

Whitney Elizabeth Houston is an American singer, actress, and filmmaker. She is named the most awarded female artist of all time by the Guinness World Records. She is one of the best-selling music artists of all time, with approximately 200 million records worldwide. She is also an influencer for many African American female artists.

The examples of famous songs by Whitney Houston.

1. “I will always love you” (1992) is a song that wants to say goodbye painfully and deeply. The lyrics present a true love that we unable to stop loving even though we are far apart unless we discover later that the person we love is not what we think.

2. “I have nothing” (1993) is a song about deep and confusing love that arises between lovers due to the different feelings of women and men when it comes to their bond with their lover.

3. Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey is an American singer, songwriter, music producer and actress. She made her debut in 1990 under the direction of Columbia Records executive Tommy Mottola. She became the first artist to have the first 5 singles hit the 1st chart on the Billboard Hot 100. She has a lot of hit songs, making her the best-selling artist in Columbia. According to Billboard magazine, she was the most successful artist of the 1990s in the United States.

The examples of famous songs by Mariah Carey.

1. “Hero” (1993) is a song that wants to convey to the audience that loving yourself is the most important thing.

2. “We belong together” (2005) is a song that reminds many couples very well. This song teaches you how powerful words are, no matter how much you do well or be honest with love. Speaking without thinking, it can ruin a relationship.

4. Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lynn Lopez is an American singer-actress. The owner of many famous songs whose past albums have sold more than 80 million copies worldwide and the movies that reach $ 2 billion.

The examples of famous songs by Jennifer Lopez.

1. “If you had my love” (1999), the lyrics are about the beginning of a new relationship with Jennifer Lopez during her confrontation with her crush.

2. “All I have” (2002) is a song that interacts between women and men., In this song, the woman is the one who breaks up and the man does not want to believe that she really leaves him. So, he tries to hold back but it is impossible to be the same. This song is a soothing melody but it expresses the pain of a man.

5. Brian McKnight

Brian McKnight is a talented artist with a wide range of singing and performance and he can play the music that ever nominated for a Grammy.

The examples of famous songs by Brian McKnight.

1. “One last cry (1993)”, the lyrics present to the people who are upset or disappointed about love, feel sorry, and want to cry. It will be the last time and don't let the same person come back to hurt us again. Tomorrow will start over, you have to tell yourself that you will have a new life and new things are waiting for you. When our thoughts and ourselves are good, we are always attracted to the good things, smiling brightly and strongly open for the something good coming in.

2. “Back at one” (1999), the lyrics present the good love that a man has for the woman he loves if he is like a bird perched on a branch and never afraid that the branches will break and fall because he believed in his own wing power.

6. Ne-Yo

Shaffer Chimere Smith, better known as Ne-Yo, is an R&B singer, songwriter, music producer, and American actor. He is famous for composing music when he composed Mario's “Let me love you”. This success leads Ne-Yo to meet with the head of Def Jam and sign a contract.

The examples of famous songs by Ne-Yo.

1. “So sick” (2006), the lyrics present that to forget about the old love are often very hard thing for many people, only time that can heal and that memory will be forgotten someday, but until then, those will always be the things that bother you to think about the past we did with an old lover.

2. “Miss Independent” (2008) is a song that wants to present that if you meet a woman and you are very interested in her, you will be able to observe her personality traits and capture her strengths and compose stories about why you like her.

7. Alicia Keys

Alicia J. Augello-Cook is an American R&B singer which sold more than 20 million copies worldwide from her first album in 2001 until 2007. The first album, “Songs in A Minor”, featured the hit song ‘Fallin’, selling more than 10 million copies worldwide and earn her 5 Grammy Awards. (Including the grand prize: Best New Artist and Best R&B Album).

The examples of famous songs by Alicia Keys.

1. “You don't know my name” (2003) is a song that presents the insanity of love on one side because he did not even know her name. She really liked him and felt that he had possessed her mind.

2. “If I ain't got you” (2004) is a love song that presents an interesting worldview philosophy. Fame, honor, and money, they do not important and are just illusions when compared with to be loved by someone.

8. John Legend

John Legend, real name John Stephens. He is an all-around R&B, soul, hip-hop artist with a wide range of singing, playing, composing, arranging, and producing music. His first album won 3 Grammy Awards 2006, 3 Soul Train Awards 2006, and 1 BET Award 2005. Britney Jean Spears, The Black Eyed Peas, Jay-Z, and more.

The examples of famous songs by John Legend.

1. “Used to love you” (2004) is a sad song that comes from the breakup. She was gone and took all the memories from him but he still remembered the moment when he first met her which make him sad when she left. Although he hates her a lot, he used to love her a lot too.

2. “All of me” (2008), the lyrics represent if you really love someone, you have to give your heart to him wholeheartedly and you need to accept him as he is no matter what it is good or bad. Then, you will be happy and you will never have to regret that later "Why are you like this or Why are you like that? " because you are willing and can accept anything that he can be.

9. Jeff Bernat

Jeff Bernat is an American-Filipino singer, songwriter, and producer. The owner of the super romantic song 'Call You Mine' has been selected to accompany the popular Korean series 'You Are My Destiny' and has a lot of Korean fans. Since he released his first full album, “The Gentleman Approach” in 2012, the 29-year-old Jeff Bernat has been on the constantly watch with subsequent albums such as “Modern Renaissance” (2013), “In the Meantime” (2016), and “Afterwards” (2017).

The examples of famous songs by Jeff Bernat.

1. “Just vibe” (2011) is a song for the fanatic. It represents to someone convey a woman who treats him equally as everyone else. Even if you are higher than him and tell her that he likes what she does, but actually likes everything that is her.

2. “Call you mine” (2019), also known as The Gentlemen approach, means approaching a woman like a gentleman. It is a song that has a good meaning and suitable for giving to someone special. The best sentence of this song is "Can I call you mine?".

10. The Weeknd

Abel Tesfaye, known as The Weeknd, is a Canadian singer, songwriter, and music producer. In late 2010, he uploads the song to YouTube by the unknown name, The Weeknd. he released several mixtapes, and each set contains nine songs throughout 2011, including the highly acclaimed House of Balloons, Thursday, and Echoes of Silence.

The examples of famous songs by The Weeknd.

1. “Heartless” (2019) is a fun song that hides the gloom of a man who blames himself for being heartless to love one another. In which the heart deeply, he wants to have good love but living a fun life, spending money, mingling with other people, is the one that makes life go around like this.

2. “Blinding lights” (2020), a melancholy song of desperate people who leave their ex-lover. The inaction of that ex-lover made the atmosphere worse and helpless. Delivering is the only chance for that person to return, and it is the thing to heal from this despair.

11. Ben Chalatit

Ben Chalatit enjoys music from his passion and attendance at the School of Music. He joins the first music group with friends under the name, Monotone. In the style of self-composed music and become indie music that is very popular at that time. And the famous songwriter, Boyd Kosiyabong, pull him into the work. He has made many famous songs such as the people below, the score of life, ouch ouch, and many more. This is evidenced by the various artist awards that he has received.

The examples of famous songs by Ben Chalatit.

1. “Hold back” (2014) is the theme song for the 2014 TV series Sai-Si Phaeng. It mixes with emotions, squeezing a little talk about the time when you lost your lover and want to hold it as long as possible. A moment of just a second would be invaluable if he would be with us.

2. “All My Heart” (2015) is a theme song, Kao Bodin drama, starring James Mar and Matt Peeranee. It is a slow-fusion-pop-style song with the sound of Thai music and tells of loving someone with all their love. This song also earns him the 30th Golden Television Award for outstanding drama song.

12. Lydia Sarunrat

The princess of the R&B of the Thai music industry. She is a gorgeous singer, Lydia Sarunrat, with a clear and unique voice. It makes her famous since her first release, such as I am free, please call me back. And there are always new songs coming out. Later, she returns to the sumo mask singer show and won “The Mask Singer Season 2”.

The examples of famous songs by Lydia Sarunrat.

1. “I'm free, please call me back” (2005) is a sad song content. Because he calls her lover but he does not answer the phone and does not call back. There is a hint in the song saying, "are you really busy or there are other people”.

2. “Just make eye contact” (2018) is a sweet love song. It composes of a period drama, Buppesanniwat. The content of this song is rather sweet. Because it wants to convey that the eyes are the windows of the heart.

The examples of artists and their works. The author thinks that the reader may know or listen to some of their songs. The artists illustrated are quite famous for their outstanding works. If you have not listened to their music, I suggest you give it a try and I believe that you will be fascinated by their work.

In conclusion, R&B (Rhythms and Blues) music is a genre that can listen to over and over. It can make you feel relax. But if you know the content of the song, some songs can also have content that can hurt, bruise or cry. Nowadays, R&B music is mix with a wide variety of other genres. This genre of music is therefore widely known. This has resulted in many emerging artists making R&B music or mixing R&B music as well.

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edendaphne · 5 years

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As promised, some angst starring Chat!Felix and Marinette (using some of the earlier concept art/designs)

Note: I'd been working on this oneshot and illustrations since before the most recent season 3 spoilers were released (the ones with episode titles and synopses) so everything in here is strictly an AU.

You can also read it here on Ao3

"I’m in love with you, Felix."

Felix stared at Marinette for a few seconds, then scoffed. He didn't have time for this today; he was planning his own love confession to Ladybug tonight and he didn’t appreciate any unnecessary distractions. Marinette’s abrupt declaration of love was merely one of numerous others he had received; call it another curse he was inflicted with, although this one wasn’t of magical origin like his ring.

"You don’t love me, Marinette," he snorted. "You love what I represent. Fame, money, fashion. You think you can get a taste of those things through me.” Looking away, he added, “Just like all the others."

Marinette faltered, "Th-that’s not true! I like you for you, not just because you’re an Agreste!"

"Is that so?" He replied sarcastically. "How could you? You don’t even know me,” he spat, words dripping with unveiled disdain.

Gathering as much determination she could, Marinette argued, "But I do! I’ve noticed things that you try to hide from others. You’re always very reserved and serious on the outside, but I know that inside you’re actually a very warm and loving person." She added a bit more quietly, "I know that you act a certain way because you’re afraid of being vulnerable, of letting people in and getting hurt, just like you’ve been hurt in the past."

Felix glared down at her from his height. "So you’ve been studying me? I don’t appreciate being psychoanalyzed, Marinette."

"No, that isn’t—! I didn’t—!" she stuttered, panicking on the inside, desperately fighting the urge to run away or hide, anything to escape from his judgmental gaze. "I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry or upset you! I just want to understand you and figure out—"

"Figure out what?” He interrupted. “How to impress me? How to talk or what to wear to make me notice you? Have you ever taken the time to actually get to know me?"

Marinette recoiled and curled in on herself, the sting of his words chipping away at her heart. "That isn’t it! You say I don’t know you at all, but you never accept my invitations to go on activities or dates! How can I get to know you better if you won’t give me a chance?"

"Maybe I don’t want to give you a chance. Have you ever considered that maybe I just want to be left alone?" He crossed his arms and said with finality, "Stop hounding me, Marinette. I can’t stand groupies."

Marinette gasped in disbelief. Bristling at being called a groupie, her stomach churned unpleasantly, suddenly feeling the need to throw up. With her voice as even as she could muster, she uttered quietly, almost whispering, “R-right. As you wish. I won’t bother you anymore, I promise.” She turned away from him, hoping she could force one foot in front of the other despite the sudden feeling of lightheadedness. “Take care of yourself, Felix. Goodbye.”

Felix sighed heavily in frustration as she walked away. He could have sworn he heard sniffling, but it must’ve just been his imagination.

Hours later after dark, Felix ran across the rooftops as Chat Noir, getting some light exercise before his patrol with Ladybug and, if he were to be completely honest with himself, to get away from his stuffy mansion. He paused on top of the bakery by the school, enjoying the delightful smells of foods he didn't allow himself to partake in, when he heard Marinette tearfully talking on the phone. That was odd. Why would she be crying at this hour?

“No… I’m not okay, but I will be eventually. It'll just take time.” She sighed. “A lot of time." She paused, listening to the other side. "No… no, please don’t confront him. He made it pretty clear that he doesn’t want anything to do with me and I’m going to respect that."

Chat Noir became rooted to the spot. She was talking about Felix, about him, and the confession from earlier.

Marinette sighed and resumed tearfully, "Maybe he’s right. Maybe I really don't know him at all. Maybe I’ve just deluded myself all this time because I thought I understood him a little. Oh, how could I have messed this up so badly? I should never have confessed! …At least I know what he really thinks of me now. I’ve never seen him look at me that way, like I was the scum of the earth, like-" she choked down a sob. "Like I was lower than dirt! Like he hated me!"

Chat’s heart dropped and he felt like he’d been dropped into a tub of ice water. Had his words really affected her that much? He didn’t actually hate Marinette. She was a genuinely nice person, always helpful and cheerful, if a bit scatterbrained and lacking in punctuality. Still, the guilt settled uncomfortably in his gut and he felt slightly dizzy, his hands clammy underneath the suit. Part of him wanted to leave so he wouldn’t have to endure hearing the rest of this conversation, but another part deep within knew he deserved the torture of hearing how much he'd hurt her.

There was another pause as Marinette continued to sob. "No… I'm giving up on him. Maybe even giving up on love altogether. This kind of pain isn't worth it." She went quiet for a few moments, then replied, "Yeah, you're right. Thanks for checking up on me, Alya. You're the best… Yeah, I'll keep in touch… Sure... Love you too. Bye."

Flabbergasted, Chat Noir still couldn’t force himself to leave the balcony. Overhearing (okay, eavesdropping) this discussion had shaken him to his core. Marinette had been honest with him earlier. Her confession was authentic and heartfelt. And not only did she care about him, but she’d also been able to see past his aloof and unfriendly demeanor that he’d used as a shield from the world ever since he was a child. For as long as he could remember, he’d given up on trying to be understood, and Marinette was the only one that had ever even attempted to do so.

Choking back a hard, uncomfortable lump in his throat, he shook his head and stood up. He needed to calm his nerves before his meeting with Ladybug, so he attempted to convince himself that his actions were entirely justified. He couldn’t help the way he felt. He didn’t like Marinette the way she apparently felt for him. Maybe he could have been more kind in his rejection but that wasn’t who he was. Felix wasn’t a nice person like her. And Marinette was resilient. She’d get over it. She’d forget him. And eventually she’d find herself a person who was her type and would suit her better. It was never meant to be.

He ignored the large, empty pit in his stomach and with these thoughts in mind, he sprinted away into the night, blending in with the darkness where he belonged.

“I’m in love with you, Ladybug.”

Ladybug widened her eyes incredulously, staring first at Chat Noir, then at the ruby red rose he was holding. She felt prickles at the back of her neck, dreading a conversation she’d hoped she would never have to have again, much less within the same day.

She pinched the bridge of her nose and suppressed a groan. Chat Noir theatrically professed his so-called affections for her just about every other week, and this time was no different. She simply wasn’t up for any teasing this night.

“Chat, can we stop with the shenanigans today? I’m really not in the mood. In fact, I almost called off tonight’s patrol.” At his questioning look, she elaborated, “Earlier today I got rejected by the guy I like and he… he didn't let me down gently." She turned away, trying desperately to even her breathing and blink away tears lest she open the floodgates again.

Chat took a step forward and took her hand, stating dramatically, “Who could have possibly been so cruel to you, My Queen? Surely they must be blind or idiotic to reject an extraordinary creature such as yourself.”

She scoffed through her nose. “He certainly didn’t seem to think I’m so extraordinary.”

Chat’s mouth widened into his trademark Cheshire grin and he replied with a flourish, “It’s a good thing I’m here then, for I’ll sing your praises far and wide all over France, letting everyone know of my adoration for you.”

Ladybug huffed incredulously, taking her hand away, her voice trembling as she snapped at him, “Chat, don’t. Don’t do this to me. Not today. Not after what happened to me earlier. Can’t you be more sensitive to my feelings and stop being so damn pushy?” After a long pause she took a deep breath and continued, “You don't love me, Chat. You… ‘you love what I represent.’”

Chat’s eyes grew wide as saucers, feeling a strong sense of déjà vu that was too close to be mere coincidence.

This can’t be… No, it couldn’t be, it just couldn’t. There’s no way fate would be this cruel.

Pushing the intruding thought aside, he argued, “But Ladybug, I do love you! I’ve loved you from the moment we met!”

Ladybug let out a small scoff. “Chat. We both know that’s a lie.” A few moments passed and she stated bluntly, “I know about your curse.”

Chat’s mouth dropped open slightly upon hearing her revelation, feeling something akin to whiplash. She knows, he thought. But how?

“You just want to use me. You always have.” Ladybug declared hotly. “Well, I'm not going to fall for it! They’re lies, all of it! Never in our entire partnership have you been honest with me.” She looked up at him and the tears finally started flowing. “You couldn’t care less about me,” she seethed.

This conversation was quickly spiraling out of his control. Desperately, Chat argued, “You know that’s not true! I do care about you!”

“Oh, please,” she dismissed him bitterly as the tears fell. “You only care about yourself. All you’ve ever wanted from me was a kiss to break the curse from your miraculous, and then you’d toss me away when you didn’t need me anymore. If you had just asked me then I’d understand, but you couldn’t even be forthright with me about it... After all we’ve been through together, don’t you think I deserve at least that?” She squeezed her eyes shut, body shaking.

Chat felt his insides crumple and it was like his body was free falling. Despite Ladybug being correct in her assumption that he didn’t start their partnership with the purest intentions, he had sincerely grown to fall deeply, irrevocably in love with her. Did she really, earnestly think he didn’t care about her at all after all this time?

“Ladybug, you have to believe me, that’s not how it is!” he insisted. “You’re the love of my life! You’re everything I could ever need!” Ladybug countered sharply, “But what about me, Chat? How about what I need?”

Chat replied quickly, “I’d give you anything you could ever possibly want! Anything you wish for would be yours.”

Feebly, she replied, “I don’t even know what I want anymore.” She muttered, aside, “Maybe Felix was right. Maybe none of us truly know each other.”

Chat Noir paled. This couldn’t be happening. All this time, right in front of him. The compassionate, thoughtful, ingenious, most important person in his life. And he’d been too blind, his soul too bitter to notice her. Thinking of it now, there was no real difference between the way the two of them acted, save a bit more confidence and outspokenness as Ladybug. The same couldn’t be said about him though. His outgoing and theatrical Chat Noir persona was the complete opposite of everything Felix was behind the mask. There was no way she could have guessed that they were one and the same. He, however, had no excuse. It should have been obvious. But Ladybug was right. He was selfish. And he’d been dishonest. Not only that, but his heartless, cruel treatment of Marinette had ruined any possible chances he may have had with her. She truly was extraordinary and he was just…

I’m an asshole, he realized.

The pain etched on her face, the red and puffy eyes that were visible despite her wearing a mask, none of it belonged there. She deserved nothing but happiness but she was the one suffering. Because of him.

He inhaled sharply as a flood of memories flashed through his mind of all the times when harsh words were directed at him, memories of his younger self hiding inside a closet, sobbing, desperately wishing for even the smallest amount of love and warmth. Until eventually, years later after countless heartbreaks and disappointments, he’d finally adapted and became numb to it. And while this defense mechanism helped him to protect his own heart, it had also rendered him uncaring and indifferent towards others. It was only recently, due to Ladybug’s kindness and influence, that Felix was slowly beginning to learn how to feel again (although admittedly he was still pretty lousy at it, as his current situation could attest to).

Ladybug sniffled and suddenly paused, as if a thought had just occurred to her. She steeled herself, resolve filled her face and she took a few rapid steps forward Chat Noir until their bodies were almost touching. She placed a hand on his chest and looked up at him, and yet her eyes looked hollow and dispirited. Her other hand moved to gently cup his jaw, then she closed her eyes and closed the remaining distance between them.

As she leaned in, Chat panicked. "W-what are you doing?!"

"Giving you what you want," she said and puckered her lips.

He pulled his head back and she opened her eyes, revealing a now agitated look. Chat took a few steps backwards hoping to get some distance between them but she followed, never letting go of him, until he backed up against a wall and had nowhere left to go. She pinned him against it roughly, using both hands, holding him still enough for her to kiss.

“L-Ladybug, wait!” he stammered. “Don’t do this! You can’t!”

Exasperated, she cried, “Don’t you want to be free from the burden of being Chat Noir? You’d never have to see me again. That’s what you want, isn’t it? Your freedom?” she spat. “One kiss and you could get rid of all this, and we can stop this game. You don’t love me and maybe I’ll never be loved like I want to be, but I can free you from this curse. And from me.”

At that instant he did something he never believed he would ever do: he pushed her away. He couldn’t accept her kiss. Not like this. This wasn’t like her. She was hurting and lashing out and asking for help all at once. This wasn’t how he wanted to end his time as Chat Noir. It couldn’t end like this.

“Ladybug, listen to me!” he pleaded, holding her firmly by her upper arms. “I don’t want this and I know you don’t want this! I can’t let you do it! You mean so much more to me than this!”

She squirmed in his grip. “I don’t believe you!!” she shouted, barely able to see him through her watery eyes.

Not letting go, Chat replied quietly, “I don’t blame you. I really don’t. I haven’t been a good partner to you; I’ve been deceitful and crass, and I’m sure someone else could do a better job at being Chat Noir. It may not come as a surprise to you that I’m not a good person in real life. In fact, I’m pretty damn horrible.” He gave a humorless chuckle.

Ladybug ceased her struggling and looked up at him in confusion.

Chat continued, “But I believe that we’re together for a reason and I don’t want to give up. I’d like to stay with you and continue to fight alongside you. I want to protect you, to destroy anything that would dare try to hurt you… But if that someone is me, then…” He tightly squeezed his eyes shut. “If you really don’t want me here then I can leave. I can leave you alone and I promise I wouldn’t bother you anymore.” He looked at her pleadingly, eyes glistening. “But if you would have me, if you would tolerate me, then I would stay with you forever. I promise.”

Through his hastened speech, Ladybug stared at him, wide eyed and full of disbelief, but as he reached the end, she broke.

Gasping and staring, a horrified Ladybug cried remorsefully, “Chat… Oh, Chat, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” She sobbed openly, not even attempting to suppress it. Chat gingerly pulled her close, gathering her into his arms. She trembled and heavy sobs violently racked her small body. He held her, soothed her, whispered to her, stroking the back of her head gently, careful so that his claws wouldn’t snag on her soft, raven hair. They stayed that way for a long time, clinging to each other like a lifeline.

An hour later, Ladybug and Chat Noir sat on the roof side-by-side, legs and hips touching. Chat's arm draped loosely around her shoulders and his thumb stroked against her upper arm, while Ladybug rested her head on his chest seeking comfort. The two sat in companionable silence; Ladybug’s crying had finally stopped and she was exhausted. Her breathing had slowed considerably and Chat wondered if she’d fallen asleep. He wished vehemently that they could stay like this forever, but they had school the next day and Felix had a very long apology to prepare, so it was time to part ways.

Chat gently nudged Ladybug’s shoulder and she stirred slightly. “Are you awake, Choupinette?”

“Hmmm…” she sighed airily and nuzzled into him. “Barely.”

He chuckled lightly and gave her a small squeeze. “I deeply regret having to disturb you, but alas, the time has come for us to say our farewells for the night.”

Ladybug harrumphed and tightly wrapped her arms around his waist in mock indignation, which caused him to laugh.

He booped her nose playfully. “You are simply too cute, Ma Choupinette. But we absolutely cannot allow such rebellion from you. You are going home even if I have to transport you there myself.” With this said, he abruptly jumped up, carrying her in his arms bridal style, the sudden movement causing her to throw her arms tightly around his neck and squeal in surprise. He followed up by vigorously tickling her ribs with the hand that held her torso.

She squirmed in his hold and laughed freely. “Alright, alright, you win, I’ll go home! Now let me down, you doof!”

Chuckling, Chat set her back down on the ground, yet his hands remained on her waist, not quite ready to fully let her go. Similarly, she had released her hold around his neck but her hands had slid down onto his chest. He could feel the hair on his arms stand up and his face heat up, along with the butterflies fluttering wildly in his chest, and he was grateful that his suit covered most of his body so she wouldn’t be able to see it.

Her expression sobered and she said with difficulty, “By the way… I’m sorry I tried to kiss you. And I’m sorry I said all those awful things to you.”

Chat stroked her cheek and spoke to her softly, “You don’t have to say sorry. Not to me. I know you were feeling devastated by what happened to you earlier. I should have been more considerate to your feelings, acted more tactful.” He frowned and he spat bitterly, “That other guy… he’s a fool. He doesn’t deserve you. He will never deserve you,” he said emphatically. “You’re too good for him, too pure and sweet and kind. There is no excuse for the way he treated you and he doesn’t deserve your attention, nor does he deserve your forgiveness.”

Ladybug looked away from him and shrugged. “He really isn’t a bad person. Honestly, I can’t even be mad at him. He had every right to not return my feelings and reject me, even if he didn’t go about it the right way. Now I’m just dreading how horribly awkward things are going to be at school.”

Chat’s eyebrows rose in shock and his throat felt dry. How could she possibly be defending Felix even now? Was it because she was in love with him and she was seeing him through rose colored lenses, or would she have been just as kind to anyone else? Knowing her though, he suspected it was the latter.

Hesitating, he gulped but finally asked, “Are… are you going to speak with him about it?”

She exhaled and she shook her head. “He seems to really dislike me,” she replied. “I won’t be talking to him unless I really have to, like if we have a school assignment together.”

Chat frowned at this. Had he really cost himself the friendship he hadn’t realized they’d had?

“I’m sorry,” he replied remorsefully. “I wish I could make it up to you.”

She smiled weakly, yet it was the most melancholy smile he’d ever seen on her beautiful face. He never wanted to see her look that way again. He felt the protectiveness that he only ever felt around her overwhelm him, promptly followed by the crushing reminder that it was he who had caused her such pain.

She patted his arm. “Don’t be sorry, Mon Foufou. It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known.”

Chat’s blood ran cold, the anxiety and self loathing he always carried within himself swelling exponentially every time he replayed that conversation in his head. He could never deserve her; not ever would he be worthy of her love. But... despite that, he still desperately longed for a chance. An opportunity to pursue her, to court her properly, to treat her like the Queen she was. Just one more chance to redeem himself, as much would be possible for a wretched person such as he, anyway. And maybe, just maybe, eventually she might forgive him. It was worth a try. She was worth the effort.

“For what it’s worth,” he spoke quietly, “I really did mean it. When I confessed.” He rubbed the back of his neck and felt his face redden. “I didn’t exactly say it the way I should have. I’m terrible at this sort of thing. Sharing my feelings and being sensitive to others. I’d like to try again sometime, and this time I’d like to do it right.” He wrung his hands together nervously. “You don’t have to say anything, I just…” he looked straight at her and said earnestly, “I just wanted you to know.”

Ladybug beamed at him, then nervously reached back to grab at one of her ponytails, developing a lovely blush that made her little freckles stand out. “Hmm… I wonder if that’s actually true. But in any case, thank you, Chat. Really.” She turned her body slightly, then added, “M-maybe someday, if you actually feel that way, and if you can prove it… Maybe we can--” she hesitated for a few moments, and continued, “Well… I won’t get ahead of myself. I don’t want to set myself up for any more disappointments. And I wouldn’t want to string you along, either; I’ll need time to get over my crush… a lot of time.” Chat felt his limbs stiffen at hearing those words again, the words Marinette had uttered back on her balcony. “I really did like him a whole lot.” She looked back at him and quirked her usual sweet smile. “But if you’re willing, then… I guess we can wait and see what happens.”

Chat Noir reached forward to take her hand, then lightly kissed her knuckles. “I’ll wait as long as it takes, My Queen. Anything for you.”

Big thanks to @imthepunchlord for letting me borrow Chat's nickname, "My Queen"

Mega super gigantic shout-outs to my amazing fabulous betas, @kryallaorchid and @chocoluckchipz who helped me with everything from brainstorming and editing to coming up with a title and summary (because I'm a hopeless hot mess) XD

#Miraculous Ladybug #Marinette Dupain Cheng #Felinette #Felix Agreste #Chat Noir #Felix!Chat #Ladybug #Eden Art #My Art: Miraculous Ladybug #Fan Art #fanfiction #Eden writes #oneshot #fanfic art #ML AU

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blueymoons · 4 years

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Hey boo! Here's a bunch of numbers for that music meme: 1, 5, 6, 15, 20, 26, 28, 35, 38, and 50 🥳❤️ Looking forward to your answers, I love your music taste!

OOOoh this is so exciting!!! @kenzthepea...I adore you and I haven’t told you that enough lately. ❤❤❤

OK..Here goes:

1. Current Favorite Song: This is hard...Because I love so many songs. But the one I kept repeating today was Cardigan by Taylor Swift. I like the melody, and the lyrics that are so intricate. I especially love the bridge and I think my brain is formulating a fic with this song...but I have to wait and see what percolates. But it feels like that’s about to happen.

5. A Song That Reminds You Of Another Time In Your Life: I’m going to with It’s Been Awhile by Staind. I don’t know why...but every time I hear this song I think back to the first guy I fell in love with. It literally never played while we were together, or featured in our relationship at all, and has nothing to do with either of us...but it makes me think of him because I feel him in it. I think it’s maybe that during the time I met him, and fell in love with him and was held by him...I was dealing with some serious things in my home life. My mother was abusive, and I felt worthless and like a complete fuck up...but all of that didn’t matter when he hugged me. None of it mattered when we were talking. It makes me feel the way he made me feel and I love that. Because I still love him. Just differently, though 15 year old me is still deeply in love with him...But I am happily married to a man who adores me, who listens to me, and who makes me feel seen...which is exactly what Daniel did for me all those years ago. We’re still very good friends and we sing karaoke together (not currently obviously) and he still gives the best hugs and he’s still as sweet and dreamy and magnetic as he was the day I met him. And I feel grateful, so damn grateful that the first man I ever loved, taught me that I was worthy of that love, so that I could recognize when my husband felt the same way. That was long...but worth it. And you knew I’d be wordy. 🤣

6. A Song That Reminds You of A Place You’ve Been: I cannot hear the Hawaiian version of I’m Yours by Jason Mraz without instantly being transported to the beach house my husband and I were married out of a little over 11 years ago. That song was played multiple times during our stay, and the Hawaiian version is so much more lovely than the radio version. It wasn’t our wedding song...but it is our unofficial wedding song. So much so that it’s the song my husband set as my ring tone when I call him. 🥰🥰🥰 I can’t seem to find the Hawaiian version but the version I linked is very damn close.

15. A Song That Makes You Want To Fall In Love: This one was really hard...Because I’m already very much in love with my husband...But I’m going to give you two...by the same artist, on the same album, because both give off some serious sex appeal to me and both would make me ache to have someone to feel that way about if I didn’t already have my Husband-Man. Wolf Like Me by Lera Lynn ft. Shovels and Rope, and Lose Myself by Lera Lynn, ft. John Paul White (you knew he had to be in here somewhere). Both are on her Plays Well With Others album, which was co-produced by John Paul and Ben Tanner (of the Alabama Shakes) at their Sun Drop Sound recording studio in Florence, Alabama and is on their label Single Lock Records (I’m a huge fan of pretty much every artist on Single Lock’s label) and these two songs are just straight up magic. Wolf Like Me is like...a werewolf love song. It’s literally her begging someone to be a wolf like her, and understand her, and I believe its a cover...but I choose to ignore that because I don’t ever want to hear anyone but Lera and S&R singing it. It’s haunting and sexy and just...ooof. So good. Lose Myself is sexy AF as well because it’s a duet with John and they’re basically singing about being in love with someone who they know is bad for them...and it’s just so painfully sexily delicious. I dare you to listen to their voices melding and not melt into a puddle. It’s almost impossible.

(This damn post is going to be really long...I hope you don’t mind. 🤣)

20. A Song You’ve Listened To On Repeat Recently: Rattle by Penny and Sparrow (I think you already know this one) has been on repeat for me lately. This song has been many things to me...But It’s become my worship song. When I REALLY need to talk to God (I’m spiritual...I hope this isn’t something that bothers you. Apologies if it is...I won’t preach...I promise) I turn this song on and I always feel closer to Him. When I first heard it I heard it as a romantic song. But the more I listened to it, the more I felt Him in it and the lyrics really called to me. “Because I’m not proud, I’m not proud, I’m not proud of me...so how could you, how could you ever be?” really nails me on the head. I feel like I fall down on being a light for God quite a bit. I try, always, to be a beacon of love and acceptance and grace to everyone. I want to understand my fellow humans...and love them despite their flaws and foibles...but it’s hard. And so this song reminds me that I’m not alone, and that I’m not the only one who occasionally feels that I’m not making Him proud...but the last lines, “I'm gonna work on waiting, If it's true you wanna say you love me every day. And I'm sorry (that it took me so long to realize) you've always felt that way”, are a beautiful reminder that God’s love for me is something he wants to give me everyday, no matter how much I’ve failed at being His beacon on Earth. So it’s my worship song, because I don’t go to church, but hearing this song is feeling a wash of his love over me and that helps me on really hard days. (I hope that wasn’t too preachy)

26. A Song That Reminds You Of Your Favorite Fictional Character: GOD SO MANY!!! Like...everyone I’ve ever written a fic about...and there are MANY. I guess the best way to find this one is to go to my AO3 series The Music Made Me Do It

28. A Song That Represents Your “Aesthetic”: I don’t really know what my “Aesthetic” is...maybe uptight, bohemian, plant loving, boy and dog mom, who over thinks everything constantly? Is that an aesthetic? LOL. So i’m not sure how to answer this one. But if “aesthetic” means what I would have playing in the house all the time, no matter what, no matter who comes over...It would be THIS entire playlist. It’s called Relaxed Jams (which is the EPITOME of an original title...I’m not good with titles...leave me alone 😂) and it’s pretty much playing nonstop in my house and car...Unless I’m listening to Hamilton...which is also constantly playing. So...there you go...My “Aesthetic”...Hope that works for you. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

35. A Song That Sends Chills Down Your Spine: In the fall of 2018 I was dealing with the knowledge that my oldest son was planning to move to Florida. And I was NOT handling it well. To be honest...I still am not handling it well. I don’t like my baby being so far away and I miss seeing his face, hearing his voice, yelling at him to clean up after himself...I just miss him like I’d miss a limb. We’ve been together since I was 18 and he’s going to be 20 in a few weeks and so, I’m sure you can imagine, over half of my life has been spent loving him. My two boys are the air in my lungs and the blood in my veins. They are EVERYTHING to me and that’s not hyperbole. It’s FACT. So, the idea of him moving away from me made me feel like I’d done something wrong, something to chase him away. And I was listening to a random Jason Mraz playlist on Spotify when I heard a song of his that I’d never heard before (which, in itself was a fucking miracle). That song is God Rests In Reason (yes...another God song...sorry) and it’s lyrics were so utterly perfect for the way I was feeling that I had to literally pull over on the side of the road because I couldn’t see where I was going for the tears in my eyes. Those lyrics were: “Well your children will not be your children They are the daughters and the sons a beginning They'll come through your womb but not be coming from you They will be with you, but they do not belong to you You can give them your love but not your thoughts 'Cause they'll arrive with their own hearts They're the coming of angels this blessed season Undone they’ll sing, Oh how God rests in reason God rests in reason Isn’t reason enough to prove how God moves through you God rests in reason And thank God you can direct the course of love itself of love itself Directs the course of life Believe not God is your heart child But rather you’re in the Heart of God” And it just SPOKE to everything I felt. I’d been asking myself why my child, who I love beyond everything else, who I’d lay down and die for if he asked me to, would want to leave me. Why would he want to go so far away...and God answered with this song. Because Michael has his own heart...and his heart is pulling him to Florida. And in those moments I started to feel a measure of peace. And I started to cope a little better. I stopped crying and feeling like he was telling me I’d done something wrong, and I started being proud that I’d raised my son to feel strongly enough about his own intuition to follow his dreams and reach for the things he wanted in life. I still miss him. I still hate that he’s gone. But it’s eased. And when it threatens to suffocate me, I go to this song. I realize it isn’t spine tingling in the manner that this question probably meant...but it tingled my spine that a song I’d never heard, by an artist I adore and thought I’d heard everything from, shuffled through my phone at a time that I really needed the message in it. I hope that makes sense...and fills the request.

38. A Song That You Think Is Underrated: I really think pretty much everything Penny & Sparrow has done is horribly underrated. These two men deserve at least the same amount of accolades that Hozier has. And I’m sure Hozier would agree with me if he’d listened to their catalog. I’m never NOT going to promote these guys and I know y’all are tired of it but they mean a literal shit ton to me and I NEED everyone to know their music and recognize their brilliance. They’re better than Ryan Adams, and all the other sad bastards of folk...and they’re complete and total sweethearts who really give a damn about their fans. I will not rest until I’ve told the entire world about Andy Baxter and Kyle Jahnke and that’s that about that. You can find a playlist of their entire catalog of music songs here. I listed them in order of release...and I recommend listening to them that way. At least for the first listen. But be prepared to be hooked because they’re addictive.

50. Free Slot! Any Song You Want To Share: I feel like you just had me create a playlist for you...And I’m totally OK with it. But I can tell you that...the song Green Eyes by Joseph will be featured in a forthcoming work of mine...The chapter has already been written...I just need time to finish the chapters before it. I guess this is a spoiler for the fic...but it isn’t really because if you know anything about my #1 ship...you know where I want it to go...and this song, is perfect for it.

Goodness Kenz...I hope this was what you were expecting because I feel like I wrote you a book.

Thanks for asking me for all of these songs...You know I love talking about my favorite musics. And I hope there are some songs that you just fall in love with here. I’d love to hear about it if you do. Hope you’re well.

Love you!

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