#especially if they havent even done any testing or looked at you yet

[thedisablednaturalist]

If you have mysterious chronic pain and have the means, here's a list of doctors you should see other than your primary and a rheumatologist:

Neurologist and/or sleep specialist

Pain management doctor (also sometimes called pain and spine doctor)

Therapist that specializes in helping physically disabled people (having chronic illness sucks and you need someone to talk to)

Psychiatrist (most people with chronic illness also need psychiatric meds)

Physical therapy or rehabilitation center that specifically has procedures for chronic illnesses. My chiropractor acts as this for me but I'd only recommend that as a last resort. If you have something like fibromyalgia or ehler dahlos syndrome you need to be very careful with how you stretch and how much exercise you do. My chiropractor has special exercise equipment that is very gentle and has a lot of padding to reduce pain.

ENT (Ears, nose, throat doctor)

Nutritionist

A primary care doctor will at most only perform blood tests. Many illnesses do not show up on these blood tests. You want to get checked for rheumatoid arthritis, lyme disease, and lupus. Even if your doctor tells you it's because your vitamin d level or iron is too low, I would still recommend further testing.

They'll most likely refer you to a rheumatologist regardless, but unless you actually have arthritis I wouldn't rely on them too much. Mine charged too much for a 10 minute appointment where all she did was give me meds and would not discuss any other treatment or management options. She also laughed at me when I asked about a mobility device. It might just be I had a bad experience but it seems like those doctors are just given chronic illness patients cause no one else wants them.

You need to get your spine looked at. An MRI is essential. At the very least get an xray of your neck and spine. A neurologist or pain + spine doctor will most likely order one.

Neurologists will check your nerves and brain function. They'll check if your nerves are overly sensitive or unresponsive. You'll get stabbed and shocked a lot.

Pain and spine doctors are the ones who will give you pain medicine. It will not be immediate. They will need to examine you (MRI) and try other medications and treatments first. This is because insurance is not going to pay for stronger drugs until you've exhausted other options. You'll most likely start with something like duloxotine, gabapentin, prescription NSAIDs, and/or muscle relaxers. Once my results came in from the MRI I was given steroid shots in my spine. They will give them in different spots first to see which spot is most effective, so don't worry if it only works one time and not the others. I cannot stress the importance of having this type of doctor on your care team. Being able to have the power to manage my pain has helped so much. This is also the doctor that signed my form for my handicapped parking permit.

Sleep studies are expensive, but sleep is extremely important for your quality of life. So many people have sleep apnea and don't know it. CPAP machines today are really quiet and comfortable. This will be essential for tackling chronic fatigue.

An ENT doctor is only if you end up having sleep apnea or have any issues with your sinuses. I had to go and get my nose fixed because even with my cpap I still wasn't getting enough air.

You need to have some way of moving your body. Only do this after you are already on a treatment plan. It's hard to do things like exercise when you are still dealing with pain and fatigue. Doctors will want you to do physical therapy first but that's not a good idea because you won't stick with it due to pain. You need to deal with the underlying problems before working on stuff like exercise and nutrition. Able bodied young people who don't exercise and don't eat well are not in constant pain, so you shouldn't be either. If they tell you to lose weight drop the doctor, that's a cop out response.

I haven't reached the step to get a nutritionist, but changing what foods you eat and when can really help with pain management. You also may find that something you eat is exacerbating your symptoms.

With my insurance plan I can pretty much call up a doctor and make an appointment without a referral. I know some plans need referrals, so either call your insurance for one or get your primary care doctor to give you one. Idk how this works for medicare but I think you can just make an appointment with anyone who takes medicare.

I have not been able to obtain a script for a mobility device from any of my doctors. If you have a type of doctor you'd recommend for that please chime in. I've heard occupational therapists are the way to go though but still need to look into that myself.

Also do not feel bad if you cannot afford these. It is not your fault. Healthcare especially in the USA fucking sucks. This is mostly only useful for people who are in the investigative stage who have insurance. I'm not saying "oh just do yoga". Your pain is not your fault, and it can take a long time to figure out a plan that's right for you. I didn't know what doctors I was supposed to see when I started out, and was just given to a rheumatologist since there isn't a fibromyalgia doctor. I only had blood tests at that point. Hopefully this helps people save time and make sure they can fully investigate the cause of their pain (or at least how to manage it better)

#chronic disability #chronic pain #spoonie #fibromyalgia #disability #ehlers danlos syndrome #eds #chronic fatigue syndrome #cfs #POTS #pots syndrome #if a doctor mentions your weight within the first 10 minutes of the exam get out if there #especially if they havent even done any testing or looked at you yet

[naralanis]

My first pen was a Pilot Metro Retro. And was promptly broke by an E-2 I let borrow it to sign paperwork (i kept the cap so he would have to give it back, but alas). And then a couple years later I jumped to a TWSBI Vac700 Iris. Anyway, i have a few different pens, but I havent found even a basic instruction on how to tune tines or maintain them besides washing them out with distilled water. And suggestions?

Hi there! Sorry about your Metro, and hope you're happy with the TWSBI! I once let someone borrow my Décimo and they... mangled it. Heartbreaking! I was eventually able to fix it, but it took some doing, and it was also a last ditch effort -- I was already fully prepared to dish out the money for a brand new nib unit, so I figured there was no harm in trying.

I'll get to the easy stuff first: if your fountain pen is writing OK, it doesn't really require more maintenance than a good flush every now and then. You don't even have to use distilled water (unless the water in your area is like, exceedingly mineral-heavy) -- plain tap water and regular dish soap will do just fine.

As for nib tuning/readjustments, they are not part of a pen's general maintenance. Readjustments are done if there's a problem with how your pen is writing, and personally I view nib tuning as something done to improve the experience to the user -- mostly to smooth a scratchy nib.

Here's the short answer as to why info on making these adjustments is a little less widespread (though still relatively easy to find):

1) While often simple, these alterations can be a bit fiddly, and it's very easy to irreparably damage your pen.

2) These alterations, but especially tuning/otherwise modifying your nib/feed, will almost certainly automatically void your pen's warranty.

Keep that in mind if you decide to undertake any tuning -- it is always at your own (and your pen's) risk.

That's the short of it! For the (much, much) longer version, as always, see below the cut!

sorry this one took so long, I got really, really into it and it is stupidly long adalskjadhls

So, first things first. Your pen writes completely fine, you wash it every now and then or whenever you're changing inks, and have an overall pleasurable experience writing with it.

Congrats! Nothing else needs to be done. Enjoy your pen.

Now, let's say your pen isn't writing completely fine. Maybe it's skipping, maybe it feels scratchy, maybe it's laying down too much ink or not enough.

Before you go straight to tuning your nib, the first thing you do is: you clean it.

"But Nara, I already cleaned it." Clean it again. You'd be amazed how often a more thorough flush fixes simple flow problems -- do it with dish soap if you used only water the second time.

The next step? Try a different ink, if you have some. Then, try some different paper. It's good to have a paper/ink combo that you're familiar with to use as a standard. I like to use a Rhodia No. 19 Dot Pad and Waterman Serenity Blue to test all of my pens -- nearly every pen I buy writes an 'inauguration' page with that exact combination.

If your pen is a cartridge/converter, always make sure the cartridge or converter is the right fit and that it's seated properly. It should fit securely without a ton of pressure -- if you can basically bop it off without trying, it's probably the wrong fit. If the converter provided to you by the retailer doesn't fit, contact them -- maybe you got a defective pen.

Alright, so you've done all of the above, but your pen is still writing funky or not at all. Now it's time to take a closer look at the nib.

Enjoy this expertly made reference image I made on my phone before I realized I could just link you to a better one.

Before you start researching how to tune/grind your nib, let's check the nib and feed alignment -- the feed is what allows the ink to travel from reservoir to paper, and if cleaning your pen hasn't solved the problem, there's a good chance it is probably not seated correctly.

Here's what you should check for:

1) Make sure your feed is flush to the underside of your nib

If there's a major gap between the underside of your nib and the top of the feed (where the ink channel is), the ink simply can't get to where it needs to be (i.e. the tip of the nib). I

If there is a major gap, you can check if your nib and feed are seated correctly in the nib section. This depends a little bit on the pen and the model, but most of the time, you can try grasping nib and feed together and gently pushing down. Remember to never grab your nib by the shoulders/tines, as that will most likely ruin it.

2) Make sure your feed is properly centered with the nib.

This is easier to check if your pen has a breather hole, which most of them do. Basically, check to see if the ink channel at the top of your feed (you can see it through the breather hole) lines up with the ink slit. Here's a good example:

And here are... not so good ones. Coincidentally, both on Conklin pens.

This is usually a simple fit -- sometimes you can gently wriggle it back in place. Other times, you need to remove the nib and feed from the collar (basically the plastic thing that holds the nib unit together) or they are friction fit to the section altogether (like in the Lamy AL-Star). Do a bit of research on your pen model before you try disassembling it.

Feed is centered? All good to go? OK, now we move on to checking the metalworks, so to speak. I recommend using a magnifying glass or loupe for this part. Here's the one I use.

4) Check your tines for a) factory oopsies and b) misalignment.

Here's an example of tines that were just... cut very wrong (sorry for poo-poo pic quality, but you should be able to see the tine on the right just... ain't right)

In the case above, contact your retailer. I noticed this one before even inking my pen, but they should cover a replacement regardless.

DISCLAIMER: all adjustments from here on out may void your pen's warranty.

(maybe not a simple realignment, but don't risk it, or ask your retailer before you try anything).

Here's an example of slightly misaligned tines (ON THE SAME PEN AFTER EXCHANGE BTW).

I stupidly didn't get pictures of my Décimo or the Duragraph above looking straight at nib pointing up -- you could actually see one of the tines sloping slightly downward. That causes unbearable (to me) scratchiness and can tear off paper fibers. No fun.

There are better examples from JetPens' Fountain Pen Troubleshooting Guide (which you should absolutely check out!)

You can fix misaligned tines yourself. It requires patience, a little pressure, and a lot of finesse not to overdo it. You can manually bend the tines back into place, but before you try it yourself, I recommend going to YouTube to see how other pen people do it. My method is similar to this one, but there are several others. You can use your fingernail to push it down, just be very careful with how much force you use.

The one method I personally don't recommend is, ironically, the one JetPens recommend on their guide. It might work just fine, but I just think it is way too easy to overdo it and get splayed tines or create a major gap between nib and feed.

OK, seems like the tines on your pen are fine? Time to...

5) Check the distance between your tines.

Your tines should, ideally, be juuust a hair apart-- only enough for the ink and capillary action do their thing. They shouldn't be touching, since that would hinder ink flow, but there should not be a gulf of distance between them either. Let's revisit another Conklin

Yay. Fun.

This is also fairly simple to fix, but again: you have to be delicate about it. I manually manipulate my tines into position and kind of go by feel by now, always testing and checking with my loupe. Here's how PenBoyRoy does it:

Again, there are many different methods, and you will often hear different things from different pen people. It's down to preference and what works for you!

OK, now we've gone through an odyssey of troubleshooting (I AM SO SORRY), let's talk about nib tuning.

Yet another disclaimer: doing anything I describe below will 100% void your pen's warranty.

Tuning your nib isn't necessarily fixing it. It certainly can, if you've done pretty much all of the above and everything looks fine but the pen isn't writing the way you want it to. I use it to smooth down pens that are technically writing OK, but the experience of writing with them isn't entirely pleasant for me.

Essentially, you're using a rougher surface to basically... 'sand down' your nib. There's a wide variety of techniques (from using a rough paper bag all the way to actual fine-grit sanding blocks), but the most important detail you need to remember is you're removing tipping material (however little).

While tuning your nibs isn't necessarily hard, it's very, very easy to overdo it, and that will cause pretty much irreparable damage. If tuning nibs is something you're interested in, practice on inexpensive pens first -- I practiced on ye olde Pilot Varsity.

The Varsity is great to practice tuning because 1) it's super cheap, so even if you fuck it up completely, it's not the end of the world. 2) It has a medium tip.

The bigger the tip = the more tipping material = more room for error.

I mainly use two things to tune my pens: micromesh and mylar paper, which are both super fine abrasives. Goulet (and other pen retailers) sell entire nib-tuning kits with everything you might need to get started, but here's my own (plus a few extras that may look scary, but trust me, you don't need all of this):

In my pen kit above, you can see my newer sheets of micromesh and mylar and the scribbles I use to tune my nibs. I hold the pen the way I normally would when writing with it, and scribble over the abrasive, but I don't do it randomly. Figure 8s are usually the go-to for simple tuning; you can also go a particular direction if you know exactly which area of your nib needs to be smoothed.

Again, even micromesh and mylar paper (particularly the latter) are incredibly fine abrasives, it is still very easy to overdo it. I have fucked up nibs before, mostly on my practice pens, but also on a not-super-cheap pen, and I had to buy a whole new nib unit.

So, like I said, possible? Very! Simple? Sure! Finicky? Hell yeah.

Side note: tuning a nib is mostly just making it write more smoothly. If you'd like to change the shape of the tipping material entirely (and thus create line variation), that is totally something that can be done!

It is called nib grinding, and it is better left to the professionals, but it is super cool!

pOK, I didn't quite mean to go into a full nib troubleshooting post, but I should have known my brain could not be stopped. Hopefully, this (extremely) long-winded, tangent-riddled descent into the rabbit hole was at least a little bit useful!

Thanks for dropping by!

#soulofkeys #ask naralanis and maybe she will deign to respond #fountain pen #pen asks #nara rambles #and holy shit how she rambles #I AM SORRY I COULD NOT HELP MYSELF #anyway #have fun I guess? #also #please do more research than reading what 1 (one) hyperfixated idiot put together on a Tumblr post #I avidly encourage it #pen talk

[an0nymousghost]

simblr asks v2

here are my answers! find the questions here.

i wrote soo much ahaha. like however much you think i wrote, i wrote more than that. imo everything i write is gold though

1. are you going to buy the new pack (cottage living) when it comes out? no, it looks really nice but i legit never ever buy packs at launch, especially cause this one is a expansion and it will probably go on sale at some point

2. do you p*rate your dlc or buy it legitimately? buy it legitimately 👌

3. what’s your favorite world? brindleton bay, it gives like seaside cottage vibes. willow creek is good but it’s boring. 

4. if you use a queue, how many posts per day do you set it as? 3 or 4. i used to do like 12 lmaoo what even was wrong with me

5. do you watch sims on youtube? yes, i watch mainly malixa, oshinsims, and msgryphi

6. what are your thoughts on the most recent pack? (dream home decorator) those sectional couches look good! but honestly im kinda annoyed because now it’s even harder to have all the items filled in when i place lots from the gallery. like i’m just saying like a lot of builds will use that pack probably and if i don’t get it then i can’t really use builds/save files 

7. how many packs/kits do you own? lemme count

expansion: all - 10/10 game: 5/10 stuff: 9/18 kits: none xo

24/38 - 63%

8. what’s your origin id? is it the same as your url? 🤗 it’s in my title, it’s celeschul. it doesn’t look that nice in my title but i use celeschul in my package files and i’m guessing people search things like, “celeschul penny hair” or something like that in order to find my cc- so i keep it in there so the search results are easier. i do want to change it though..

but no it’s also not the same! well i mean it’s the username i use for cc. my origin id used to be an0nymousghost but i changed it. i wonder if anyone’s taken that one?

9. is your simblr your sideblog or main blog? main blog ✌️ my old blog @stardze​ is a main blog as well.

my old old simblr was a sideblog but it had like 1 follower and it literally a bot so i don’t think that counts. i have a multifandom sideblog though 

10. do you have a cc finds blog? i wish. i was thinking bout it earlier and that would be sooo neat but sometimes i download stuff that doesn’t have a tumblr post attached to it, and also it’s stressful to keep up with so nah

11. are you wcif friendly? yes sir. in fact i bring the trouble of wcifs onto myself but doing them even when nobody asked.

12. what’s your favorite sized household to play with? (ex. 1 sim, 4 sims) gonna have to think on this one, honestly 1 sim is really fun and stuff goes by so fast. doing stuff with astrid when she was on her own, it was much more efficient. 

for families, i haven’t done that in a while actually. 5, 2 parents and 3 kids is cute tho. why did i write this this is honestly such a hard question

13. if you have c&d, do you play with pets? i feel like i haven’t played with cats and dogs in forever. honestly i just have no paitence. noelle fae was supposed to get a cat (there’s a food bowl + cat bed in her house) but when summer vacation started, the amount of time i spent playing ts4 decreased a lot. (this doesn’t really make sense, i have a lot more time. honestly it just has to do with my recent obsession with a certain anime/manga and some other personal thing)

i did random nightmares in may though and i had pets frequently. g5 didn’t because sofia scarlett lived in an apartment, but g2/3/4 had cici, and g1 had all the cats. but that was back in march so it’s been a while.

14. what lifespan do you use? i really want to do aging off but then i feel like it drags on. but aging legit stresses me out, sometimes i just want to sit down and do some cas stuff but i only have 2 hours in real time and there’s like 4 days left till one of my sims’ birthdays. 

15. if you own a lot of packs, how many of them have you actually played through? just so everyone is aware this question was made for me

i feel like eps require a specific save made for testing them out, but the only save i’ve ever made for an ep is noelle fae’s get famous save. 

that is literally a lie - i made a save for island living with one of my 100bc kids, maisie acapella. i did actually post it on tumblr BUT then i deleted all the posts BUT i reblogged them on my alt account BUT i privated my alt account so i honestly forgot about it

i have never played through discover university or watched anyone do it on youtube, i’ve read gerbits’ story about it so i think i’m pretty qualified. i’ve always wanted to do one with periwinkle acapella but i never got around to it

another ep i know nothing about is get to work

i tried doing a eco life playthrough but i hadn’t watched any videos and i was like..what is going on. so i quit lolx d ;;;;; i mentioned it but the whimsy stories legacy was the first time i had played with the eco lifestyle features so technically i think i know what im doing

i got outdoor retreat literally on monday of this week so i haven’t played through it yet. 

jungle adventure i still don’t know what’s going on. i remember last year before i bought the pack i was brainstorming, and wanted to do a ja playthrough with luna and cedar, who are a couple who i did a random legacy with and it was all queued to post when i deleted everything (if you’re wondering why, it’s because my queue was literally 200+ posts). except this time i didn’t save them to my sideblog so i lost them. 

i still havent had a restaurant in dine out 

also never did the vet thing from cats and dogs

i have no idea what that rock climbing thing is from snowy escape but i did most of the other stuff because rn g5

city living i did through psc stage 5 and also it was the first pack i bought anyways

the rest of them are either stuff packs or i ended up playing them through casual gameplay (seasons, parenthood)

16. what do you do as you play sims? (ex. listen to music) i listen to music most of the time, or listen to commentary youtube videos because i am an alpha chad. i also used to talk with my friends on voice call but i don’t do that anymore 🥲

17. which sims challenges have you tried? random legacy, whimsy stories, perfect sim challenge, 100 baby, legacy (just the plain get-to-10-gens one), random nightmares, berry zodiac, astrology legacy, apocalypse

i feel like im forgetting some.. honestly most of the stuff i did before simblr was either 100 baby (i love that challenge) or random saves that lasted for 2 seconds. 

18. do you like the new(ish) hair swatches? nah. 

i do appreciate that most cc hairs have a true (ish) black, thank god! and the fact that the hair update is what inspired me to update and fix a bunch of hairs with different issues is pretty nice. but will i use them? no. 

plus it takes up like 5 gb? depending on how many packs you have.

19. post the latest screenshot you took 📸

i live in cas

20. what is the cc/ingame hair that looks the most like your own? i think that dream home decorator side part hair looks a lot like my hair. honestly i havent see much like my hair but that one is kinda-? close

21. who is your favorite sim of yours and what is their story? noelle and alari fae i think! 

link to post

noelle is blonde and has blue-grey eyes. she wears purple contacts pretty often though (because she wants to 😌)

alari has light brown hair that is kinda curly, and she’s got pretty vibrant blue eyes. 

they’re sisters, alari is 3 years older than noelle. noelle was 19 and alari was 22 when they got spotted

they worked as models when they were young adults. their jobs involved dyeing their hair blue/pink, and they would model like clothes and stuff. anyways, they were pretty successful. like not ultra famous but they had enough money to not work for the rest of their lives. 

their modeling group was made of 4 girls, the others were named paisley autumn and they were green and red, respectively. some things are: 

paisley and alari started dating during this 

autumn was a single mother to a little girl named destiny

noelle dated many people during this but never ended up finding the one <3

when their contract ended after like 6 years, paisley and alari went to go live together and noelle decided to get into acting. so thats when get famous playthrough started!

there’s more but basically they’re like oc’s with sims on the side. xoxo

22. if you use cc, are there any cc creators that you have like ALL of their items? this is such a good question! i hoard hair very heavily (my folder is 11gb) i so i have like 97% from most of the popular hair creators. 

i think i had legitimately EVERYTHING from simstrouble though, i went through multiple times to check and i also have all of her retired stuff. 

i have everything from ridgeport i think-? because of the fact that she uploaded all her stuff in one big zip. 

i think that’s it.. for a long time i also had everything by clumsyalienn, but then i ended up deleting it and only keeping my faves. 

and looking at my collection, maybe ah00b? i might be missing a couple but i at least have like 99%.

23. what’s one pack you think is underrated? dine out, it’s laggy af yes but it’s such a nice thing for my sims to do. 

24. what are your favorite sims stories/legacies? melons by gerbits always and forever

this question was inspired by this ask anyways so 

25. if you could change one small thing about ts4, what would it be? most of my suggestions are pretty complex but literally just - when you add tray files, they appear at the top. my life would be so much easier

this took me literal hours to answer

#replies #replying to MYSELF

[wolferals]

✨UNDER MY SKIN(S)✨

james cook x reader

„Y/n, friend." your mom shouted from downstairs. You were still busy with your english homework as you got interrupted. A sigh leaving your lips you got up from your desk to walk down to the door. Who of your friends would show up on a Tuesday night at 9pm when they knew you were busy doing schoolwork?

As your head shot around the corner you let out a frustrated moan.

The brown haired boy grinned sheepishly as he had his hands behind his back. „Cook." you spoke and approached the interrupter of your busy night.

„Hello y/n. Looking stunning."

Looking down at yourself you realized you were only wearing a big sweatshirt and some knitted socks to keep you feet warm. You were not wearing pants at all, and your hair was up in a messy bun.

„What do you want? I'm busy." You snapped at him but he just kept on smiling.

„I wanted to see if you were up for some fun. Freds and J are twats and studying for the exam tomorrow. Eff's a bit of a headache at the moment and Naomikins wont answer the door." He explained and rested his arm on the doorframe.

„Cook, as I said, I'm busy."

He made his lip tremble a bit, making you roll your eyes at him. „Come on y/n/n, just for an hour or two. I promise I dont got any drugs this time. I just dont wanna be alone right now. I'm going through something."

You again rolled your eyes at this jackass and joked:"Did Effy not wanna fuck you tonight? I'm really sorry. But fuck, fine. I just gotta get dressed. Come in and close the door behind you."

Like a little kid he let out a happy laugh as you walked upstairs, noticing that Cook was following you.

„Hello? Privacy? Also my mom won't like you being in my room with me, at that time especially."

He closed the door to your room and started looking around while you rummaged through your closet.

„You got a nice room y/n/n. Why havent I been in here?"

He asked and played with your dreamcatcher.

„Well because you're a dick Cookie? And I dont like dicks in my room."

-„Thats cool, but hey now you got one in your room. A big one. One that could make you feel real good."

He started laughing and pointed at his crotch. „Fuck you Cook. Turn around."

You quickly took off your sweater and threw on a white cardigan and paired it with a pair of some wide legged jeans.

„Okay I'm done." you then spoke and watched Cook scan your body from head to toe. „Looks cute."

You were surprised by his choice of words but didn't complain. Smiling, you grabbed your stuff and you two headed downstairs.

„Mom, I'll have to help Cook with something real quick, I'll be back in an hour."

You were about to open the front door when your mom stood in the hall. „Where are you going?" She asked, a serious expression on her face.

„Just around the block. I promise I'll be back soon."

Cook just stood there and watched you and your mom discuss but suddenly spoke up:"Ms y/l/n, I promise I'll have her back in exactly one hour. I'll take care of her, nothing will happen to your daughter I swear."

You stared at him in disbelief. That Cook new words like „I promise" or „I'll take care" shocked you a bit.

„Fine. One hour. You have a test tomorrow sweetheart, have that in mind." Your mom finally let you go and Cook didnt waste any more time slipping through the door outside, pulling you with him.

„Wow your mum seems..."

-„I know." you scoffed and shut the door.

Cook took a deep breath as well.

„So you ready for the exam tomorrow?" He then asked.

Walking down the dark street you shrugged your shoulders at him. „I think so but to be honest I was too tired to make anything stay in my brain tonight."

He laughed lightly and replied:"Welcome to my world."

You gave him a quick glance before continuing to walk through the darkness.

It didnt make you uncomfortable being with Cook, even though in fact this was your first time being alone. You simply didn't know what to say to him. He was just too different from you.

„You wanna have some fun?" He broke the silence suddenly as you two walked towards a big building.

„Sure; whats that though?"

He gave you a devilish smirk. „Ever really partied before?"

You shook your head while Cook grabbed your hand to pull you towards the building. His hand was bigger than yours. And it was warm, it felt nice holding someone's hand. You'd never had a boyfriend to touch you but that little thing you got from him there was really nice though.

„Cook what is this place?" you asked when the red lights hit you right in the face. „You're gonna love it." He smiled at you, still holding your hand.

Once down in the basement you two met a bunch of people lining up in front of a big door.

You spotted a bouncer at front letting certain people in.

„I just need you to do one thing. Could you please flirt with that man so we can get in easier? They dont really like me here that much, you need to work with those."

Cook pointed at your boobs.

„Are you kidding?" You asked him, not believing a word he just said. „Please, I really think you'd like it, plus we dont got too much time left. I need to get you home in 40 minutes so just show him your tits and we can have some fun."

You scoffed at him but eventually pulled him up to the bouncer. The guy was around 25, attractive he was for sure but you didnt really know what to say.

„Oh you again, why dont you fuck off?" He looked at Cook.

You gave Cookie a serious look and then turned back to the bouncer. „Hi, I'm sorry I've never been here before; and my friend just told me I'd have a lot of fun in there. Dont you think you could let us in, please?" You gave him your puppy eyes and lightly bit your lip.

He looked inbetween you two and spoke:"This your girlfriend?" He was obviously speaking to Cook.

He just shook his head and you answered:"No sir he's not. We're just here to have fun. I promise we won't be here for long, just a bit of fun. Please sir?"

He breathed out and opened the door behind you. „Alright then sweetheart. And you, dont come here again after tonight." Cook grinned and pulled me inside the club, speaking a „cheers" to the bouncer before coming closer to my ear due to the loud music.

„Promise one thing y/n. Have fun. Let it all go and be free. Just for now."

You looked up at him, his face being lit by the colorful lights. He again smiled at you. „I promise." was all you said before basically jumping into the middle of the dance floor and letting yourself go. A upbeat song was playing and you just started jumping and dancing with Cook as if there was no tomorrow. He seemed to enjoy it as much as you did because he was laughing. You'd never seen him so cheerful and genuinely happy.

„Cookie?" you yelled against the loud music and grabbed onto his neck. „Thank you so much for bringing me here!"

He nuzzled his head in your neck and placed a soft kiss against your skin. „Just let go." You held onto his neck and danced with him again. His forehead rested against yours and your eyes kept locked. It felt like the world around you two had stopped. It felt like Cook and you were the only thing that mattered, as if it cured every worry in your body.

And before you could think about it, you pulled him close and placed your lips onto his. He kissed you back immediately but his kiss was different than you'd expected. It was softer, much more passionate that you'd ever imagined. His hands grabbed you by the waist until you let go of him and smiled brightly.

„Take me home Cook." He licked his lips and nodded as you two made your way through the crowd to the exit door.

Once the noise had quiet down and the only thing you could feel was your own heavy heartbeat and the cold air hitting you, you leaned against the wall. Cook did the same and let out a soft giggle.

„Did you have fun?" He asked and turned his head to look at you. „A lot." You smiled happily.

„Good. Yeah, good."

He stepped closer and placed both his hands on the wall next to your head. He looked down at you and licked his lips once again. „We still got 19 minutes. Sure you wanna go home now?"

Before you got to answer he had kissed you again. It felt too good to be true, his lips moving in perfect sync with yours. His hand on your neck and your hands in his hair.

He truly was a fantastic kisser.

And yet again, the world around you had stopped. Cook was the only thing that mattered to you and deep down you knew how wrong it all was but Cook made you feel worth it. Made you feel good about yourself.

After he let go of you, he grabbed your hand once again and you two slowly walked back to your house without saying another word.

You only caught him looking at you every now and then.

But as you stood in front of your house you turned to him and said:"Thank you Cook, I had a lot of fun in that just one hour." He laughed and replied:"Good. Im glad that I could at least make someone happy tonight."

You giggled as well before looking around to see if your mom was by any chance watching you. But the lights were off and the blinds were shut so you looked back at Cook and placed another quick kiss on his lips.

He didnt seem to be having it, so he pulled you even closer to have a proper harder kiss this time.

„I'll see you tomorrow then?" He asked and put a strand of hair behind your ear. „You see that balcony? Left window is mine. Next time make sure my mom doesnt see you."

He laughed his significant cook laugh and nodded. „Understood. But how soon would be too soon? I mean would it be inappropriate to show up in, lets say 10 minutes?"

-„Cook I'm really not the girl to..."

He grabbed your head and spoke:"No, no I just dont wanna go home yet and I wanna cuddle a bit. I'd be gone before your mum could notice anything."

„Cuddle" Cook wanted to cuddle, that was a first.

„Goodnight cook. See you tomorrow."

He nodded, let go of your hand and walked a couple of steps closer to the street.

„Its really warm tonight, I'll have to air out my room a bit though." you hinted and smiled at him before stepping inside the house. Before closing the front door you saw Cook smiling happily at you before looking up to your room for you to open the window for him. This boy was up for some closure he'd never had before.

#jamescook #skins #jack o’connell #cute #preference #preferences #imagine #relationship #love #bristol #e4 #i'mcook

[tumblebee-the-smol-bean]

Oh! What about a classification universe where everyone takes a test and gets their classification (little,neutral, caregiver). Everyone gets what was expected (Virge and Ro little and Pat, Lo, and Janus are caregivers). Everyone expects Remus to get neutral but he gets little. He tries to hide it for a bit until Logan walks in and finds out! (Maybe Pat could be Virgil's cg and Janus could be Roman's? What ever works for you!) Thank you!

Warning: there be a few cuss words here babies.

Remus fiddled with the corners of the envelope he held between his fingers. The friend group had all taken the tests together so they could find out their classifications at the same time. And now here they were, all sitting around in Patton's living room.

He wasn't nervous of course. He knew what everyone including himself would get. Patton was literally the dad friend so of course he would be a caregiver, and if Patton was the dad friend, Logan was the stricter, more cautious mom friend. Then there was Janus who was also a mom friend, but a little more relaxed. He would bet money that Virgil and his brother were littles. Vee already exemplified basically all of the traits and he and Patton pretty much already had a caregiver, regressor relationship going as it was. Then of course Roman was just childish and creative. But Remus? Remus was all crude jokes, chaotic energy and innuendo. He would not be a good caretaker and definitely not a regressor. So he was okay with being the only neutral in the group and told them all as much.

"Now kiddo, we havent even opened our envelopes yet! We dont know what any of us are going to be. Don't make assumptions."

Patton wagged a finger at him playfully.

Logan straightened his glasses. "Actually the true answer lies between both of your responses. While we technically dont know what our results are yet we can make an educated guess based on the traits we exemplify and how likely it is for us to be sorted into each category baised off our traits."

"Ugh! Let's just do it already! I'm tired of waiting!" Roman said exasperated before practically ripping into his. He beamed at the results. "We were right! 'Regressor: 4 to 7 headspace!" He cheered. Janus rolled his eyes with a smile. "Now that one was obvious." There are cheers and congratulations from around the circle and they move on to the next person. Janus is of course a caregiver, as are Logan and Patton. When the circle reaches Virgil he shrinks in on himself and fidgets with his envelope, looking at it like it might come to life and bite him.

"Here kiddo," Patton offered, holding out his hand "would you like me to read it?" Verge nodded and handed it to Patton, stuffing his hands in his pockets and looking down.

Patton carefully opens the envelope and scans the contents before breaking out in a smile. "Regressor: 1 to 4 headspace!"

He immediately pulls Virgil in for a hug, likely to comfort him and quell any panic that might be arising as everyone else congratulates him. Virgil of course latches on like a sea monkey and rests his head on Pattons shoulder with a small smile, giggling as the dad friend whispers some joke in his ear, almost assuredly a pun.

Finally only Remus is left. With all eyes on him he smirks and tears open his envelope, ripping out the paper only to stop dead at what he sees in print. He only has a few seconds to think quickly, keep his poker face and turn it into a smile as he tucks his paper back in the envelope.

"Well no fucking surprise here! Nuetral!" Patton reprimands his language but they all smile and clap for him, although Janus looks at him a tad suspiciously.

"Well we should all probably get home. It is getting rather late." Janus commented.

Roman gets a ride with him and Virgil decides to sleep over at Patton's place. That left Logan and Remus.

"Do you require a ride home Remus?" Logan asked.

"Nope! Just gonna shove a broomstick up my butt and fly home on it like a witch!"

Logan looked unimpressed.

"...yeah I could use a ride."

"Well alright then." Logan smiled and grabed his keys. The two waved to Patton and Virgil before heading out the door. They got in the car and Logan double checked to make sure Remus had his seatbelt buckled. He hadn't forgotten the time he almost flew through the windshield and got glass in his forehead because 'seatbelts just take all the excitement out of driving'

Remus rolled his eyes but complied and satisfied Logan began the drive to Remus's house, playing some nerdy music on the car audio.

Remus didnt look at Logan the whole drive. He just stared out the window and felt his stomach turn as he recalled the actual contents of his results.

A regressor. But he couldn't be! It had to be wrong! Roman was the childish one with his disney and cartoons. Remus was...punk, feral, deranged some might even say...he was the furthest thing from a kid.

A few minutes later his thoughts were interrupted by his phone buzzing and he sighed. It was Roman telling him that Janus had agreed to try out being his caregiver and he was going to spend a few days at his house instead. He was going to have a few very lonely days ahead of him. But that might be for the best as he has to process everything.

Before he even realized it Logan was pulling up to his house. He thanked him devoid of his usual energy and walked inside. Missing the concerned look Logan threw his way.

The first thing he did was hide his letter under his mattress and then he stared at the ceiling, trying to figure out how this could have happened.

He came to the conclusion that he wasnt a regressor. The tests were wrong. Or at least he wasnt going to be. He was Remus for satans sake and he intended to stay that way. And if he ever started to feel SMALL. Well then he would just ignore it until it went away. That shouldn't be too hard right?

Wrong. It had been three weeks since they all got their classification and Remus felt like absolute shit.

Both Roman and Virgil had regressed a few times and were settling in with their caregivers. They seemed...happy. but Remus? He was just tired. Every once in a while (especially when things seemed to get ovewhelming) he would feel his head start to go fuzzy and he would begin to feel an odd sense of calm and a sinking feeling. However he was always able to push it down and shake it off before continuing on with his day like it hadn't happened. The only problem was it seemed to be increasing in frequency. It had gone from happening a few times a week to a few times a day and truth be told he was starting to get overwhelmed.

Then it happened. The worst episode hit him while they were all hanging out at his house. The others were having some sort of conversation but he couldn't focus on what they were saying. Too busy trying to get rid of it. It wasnt working though. He subconsciously leaned into the nearest person to him for comfort, which happened to be Logan. He raised an eyebrow at this as Remus was generally not one for physical affection. He wraps an arm around his waist anyways. If Remus needed him he would oblige. "Are you quite alright Remus?" He asked causing Remus to jump and realize what he had been doing. He had to get out of there. Now.

"Mhm! Yuppers, fit as a fiddle...I'm gonna go lay down. Bye!"

And with that he scampered off to his room. Curling up in his blankets he took his envelope out from under his mattress and glared at it as if that would somehow magically change the results. But of course it didn't. All of a sudden his emotions were alot harder to suppress and he was just so confused and upset and angry all at once. He felt something warm on his face and realized he was crying which made him cry harder, he stuffed a blanket covered fist in his mouth to try and muffle the sounds and hugged a pillow close to his chest.

There was a knocking at the door then. "Remus? Are you quite alright? You left rather suddenly and I thought it best to check on you." Logans voice drifted in from outside his door and part of Remus wanted to open it and launch himself into his arms and just stay there, cuddled up while Logan comforted him. But he didn't. He wasnt a baby, he could deal with this on his own.

When no answer came Logan tried to knob and the door creaked open. Remus cursed himself silently for not locking it.

Upon seeing remus curled on the bed, teartracks down his face and obviously upset, logan rushed over and laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Remus? What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

That's when his eyes caught on the envelope on his bed and he picked it up. Remus emmiting a high pitched whine when he did.

Logan looked confused for all of a second before he put the pieces together.

"...you arent actually a neutral, are you?"

He shook his head sadly and Logan sighed, sitting on the bed with him.

"Remus, you didnt have to hide this. We're all here to support you." He rested a hand on his shoulder again and Remus leaned into the touch, giving Logan an idea.

"Remus, may I hold you?"

He practically jumped at the offer and noded vigorously. That's all he wanted right now.

Logan smiled softly and crawls on the bed, leaning up on the headboard and pulling Remus against his chest, where he instantly relaxed. He hummed softly to him and rested a hand on his back.

"May I see your results?" He asked and Remus nodded slowly. He trusted Logan.

Logan nodded and pressed a kiss to the top of Remus's head as he opened up the envelope and took a look at the contents inside.

Regressor: 3 to 7 headspace.

Logan nodded to himself and slipped it back in the envelope.

"Thank you for letting me see that Remus, can you tell me how old you are right now?"

"M seventeen." He mumbled and Logan sighed, changing tactics.

"How many times have you regressed in the last three weeks?"

There's a long pause and Remus shifts awkwardly against him.

"Remus?"

"....none." he whispered. He knew it wasn't good to suppress regression but he had done it anyways.

Logan pursed his lips, but honestly he had expected this.

"Come on love," he coaxedRemus out of the bed. "We're going to get you out of the house so you can regress without being around everyone. Is that alright with you?"

He noded and followed Logan. They left with some excuse about running an errand and get in Logan's car. He made sure Remus was buckled and started the engine.

"Where we goin?" Remus asked curiously.

"The store." Logan responded. "I assume you dont have any supplies?"

Remus blushed and nodded his head. No use buying little gear if you told yourself you weren't going to regress.

They pulled into the parking lot of a store for that purpose a few minutes later and Logan took his hand as they walked through the parking lot which only served to make him feel smaller and push him further into regression.

When they entered the store Logan took him down a few aisles, stopping when they reached the toys.

"Okay, you may pick out two toys, I'm going to go and get you a few more things. Stay there alright?"

Remus nodded, in awe of all the options the toy isle held. While Logan was off shopping he picked out a nerf gun and an octopus plushie, running up to the cart excitedly to drop them in when Logan returned.

He smiled. "Did you find something you liked little cephalopod?" This caused Remus to nod and giggle happily and Logan chuckled back in response. He had filled the cart with other supplies. Sippy cups, pacifiers, a couple of snacks and small foods as well as some assorted juice boxes.

Remus looked at them all in excitment. And Logan led him through the checkout. Buckling him back up in the car with his octopus, the rest of the bags in the back.

Remus swung his legs happily in the passenger seat while he clutched his new stuffie. Gaining a small smile from Logan.

"Are you alright if we go back to my apartment cephy?"

Remus nodded happily and they made their way to where Logan lived. He was the oldest and so he lived on his own in an apartment just off his college campus.

He quickly unloaded all the groceries and picked Remus up, carrying him inside much to his delight.

The two spent the rest of the day together. Remus ate dinosaurs nuggets and ketchup for dinner which he used to create a whole mess that Logan rolled his eyes fondly at but cleaned up. Then they watched cartoons and snuggled together and Logan watched as he used a new coloring book. Praising every drawing even if they were slightly... unorthodox. Eventually Logan announced that it was bedtime for little boys and while Remus pouted when he was set down on the soft bed he couldn't help but look at Logan like he put all the stars in the sky and he gathered up the courage to ask him his question.

"Lolo?"

"Yes Chephy?"

"Will you be my caregiver?"

"I would be delighted to."

The day ended perfectly for both of them, cuddling on the bed until they fell asleep.

#agere #sfwagere #sanders sides #virgil sanders #fanfic #sanders sides agere #sympathetic deceit #logan sanders #patton sanders #agere remus #sympathetic remus #remus sanders #cg logan #Janus Sanders

[kirishwima]

what pisses off the RFA, or what makes them go T_T ?

ohh its good ol' angst time i see

YOOSUNG:

* When it comes to fears, things that twist his heart like thorns on a rose, the one thing that comes to mind is death.

* His first true experience with death and loss was when he lost Rika, and we all saw how much that affected him; it got him thinking of what it's like to die, what comes next, it makes him wonder if he's lived a life worth living and when he realizes he has done nothing of what he wanted to he panics, cries even

* When it comes to anger, what upsets him like no other are lies, or having his kindness being mistaken for naivety. He's a cheerful guy, he's gentle and caring; but he's not an idiot, and you'd be a fool to treat him as such.

* When people take advantage of his kindness he'll show them a face they've never seen before-long gone is sweet happy Yoosung and in his place comes a menace, his gaze ice cold and his words dripping venom.

ZEN:

* He likes to play at being a 'macho man', even though he too acknowledges the faults of toxic masculinity, even if he falls into some of its traps. Yet his biggest fear isn't to not be perceived as manly. No, his fear is to be acknowledged.

* What does that mean? You ask and you're right, it's very vague phrasing. For me at least, Zen seems to always be putting up an act (especially in other routes except his own); he's so scared of letting true emotions show, to expose himself for who he really is that he tries to pull a facade, be it over exaggerating and focusing on his beauty to flat out avoiding conversations so as to not show his cards, his isnecurities. He's afraid of being seen.

* As for what pisses him off, well...Jumin obviously lmao

* Nah, what really angers him like no other is greed and convinience. He hates being handed things, can't stand to be coddled. He needs to know he's earned his place and victories through his hard work and hard work alone. If he sees people taking advantage of the system, using priveleges others aren't privy to and then pretending they got to where they are on their own he WILL expose them for the idiots they really are lol

JAEHEE:

((friendly reminder that i havent plaged her route in a long while so these are mainly observations from other routes))

* She likes to pretend nothing truly fazes her, but truly Jaehee takes things to heart much more than one would think. That's also exactly why she's built up walls for herself, afraid of letting anyone else in because...what if they hurt her? What if they don't like what they find once she lets them in? ...what if they leave?

* Of course the death of her parents impacted her like no other event, and losing loved ones in a flash like that is jarring, especially at a young age; so Jaehee's always afraid of people getting too close, and worse-of people leaving.

* As for anger, she HATES being taken advantage of. Similarly to Yoosung, but the main difference is that it's not her kindness people tend to take advantage of, but her capabilities and resilience. People think she's a reliable wall, piling things atop of her without even once thinking she might break under the pressure.

* What's worse, is Jaehee will rarely if ever lash out in anger, or even at least tell people to stop. She lets them lean on her until she can't no more, and then she simply takes a step back away from them, becomes cold but never mean. It might just be that she doesn't know how to.

JUMIN:

* Yes yes, Jumin the 'robot' as Zen calls him does have feelings, and fears and worries-truly he might be more human beneath his cold exterior than any one person may ever truly know.

* Jumin's big flaw is that once he's attatched to someone, once he bonds with them, he'll be there for life. Even if the person he loves is to kick him to the ground, even if they hurt him and dispose him like a carcass, if he's with you he's with you 'till the end of the line. Jumin's fear is that he cares too much or not at all, and there's no inbetween.

* He's learnt to deal in extremes, and that's not a trait you can simply unlearn; moderation has never been a part of him, and he fears it never will. So he'll love, or he'll hate, but he'll never simply tolerate (even if he may sometimes make it seem that way).

* As for anger, there's very few things that infuriate Jumin. Or rather, it's that he bottles in his furstrations until much later on he reaches a tipping point, unlesshing all those grievances like breaking glass. For him to come to that point though, it takes a LOT.

* One thing that can and will anger him like no other, even to the point of being physically fighting, is seeing someone mistreat animals. He WILL throw hands don't test him just because he looks like a prim and proper gentleman. 😤

SEVEN/LUCIEL/SAEYOUNG:

* I mean...we all know Seven is in fact a bundle of insecurities and fears moulded into human form.

* His fears and worries are countless and they often keep him up at night; losing the ones he loves, being unable to help as people he cares about suffer, having others be put in an unfavorable situation because of him...oh wait these are all things that HAVE happened and he has gone through. No wonder this man is as closed off as he is.

* So yeah, he has a myriad of fears. But honestly, and this will sound cliche I know...his biggest fear is himself. Wether he's good enough, wether he's worthy of love, if it's okay for him to be cared for, they're all worries that choke his throat, making him push others away for their own sake. Teaching Saeyoung to accept himself, and him truly believing he's capable of being loved is a long hard process.

* When it comes to anger, well generally he's learnt to keep his cool under most situations given his training, but he will go feral if he sees anyone being abused under any form. Knowing what it's like to be a victim in your own house, to cower from the people that should be there to protect you-he'll fight for the victims with tooth and nail.

V/JIHYUN:

* Similarly to Seven V's a burrito of insecurities, with a stuffing of fears and worries.

* He'a afraid of hurting the ones he loves, afraid that he's too much, too little, not enough and overwhelming all at once. He's afraid of moderation, afraid he'll never be able to provide the love one needs as they need it.

* In truth, he's afraid of being abandoned, and this deeply rooted fear is the one that blooms the rest of his insecurities and worries. He's afraid that if he doesn't mould himself into exactly what the other person seeks, they'll leave him in search of something better. He's terrified of being alone.

* When it comes to anger, in the past as a young teen the slightest thing could infuriate him, and he'd freely voice his anger even if it hurt others. Nowdays though, mainly because of the aforementioned fears, he's learnt to handle his anger, and it's a feeling he rarely experiences.

* One thing that can anger him to no end though, is if you dare hurt or taunt the ones he loves. If you even look at the ones he cares for the wrong way, he'll point you with a glare so cold and sharp you can feel blood pool on the tip of your tongue.

* Don't mess with V's family. DON'T.

-send me mystic messenger headcanons for character reactions-

#i rly enjoyed writing this OwO #i love analysing characters lol it reminds me of essays in english lit which i LOVED SO MUCH aaa #mystic messenger #mysme #mysme headcanons #mystic messenger headcanons #mysme prompts #mystic messenger prompts #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #mysme zen #hyun ryu #jumin han #luciel choi #saeyoung choi #jihyun kim #mysme v

[el-im]

im putting all the things ive been meaning to write posts about into one single item because i am feeling Very Observed lately and i figure with it being as early as it is that hopefully this wont show up on some peoples dashes by the time they get around to pulling up tumblr today. 

first of all heres a photo dump and some captions

from when i texted charlie my images of the sisko card, which i was really hoping he’d like

a smiley face on my coffee 

i was gonna make a gender joke here bc the longer i looked at these before n after pinning back my hair pictures the more i was like ‘oh we just flipped gender presentation like a lightswitch huh’ but that was not funny and i am not funny and I wish i were but im not and its kind of a >:( fact thats been bugging me lately. 

from mom, yesterday, who dropped off one for me, one for nick, one for mia, and one for abe. i was expecting this to be the only thing i got/heads up/message on valentines day but i woke up this morning to find that aub had sent me a playlist that i looked at but havent listened to yet (because im trying to order my responses to things in increasing complexity and time--i responded to the tik toks elanor sent me first, them had a look at the star trek document that joe sent me and commented on the questions he asked without giving away spoilers, and am now making this post, which ive been meaning to make, and will then maybe try to listen to the playlist and then respond to michelle’s email) 

these are joes thoughts from some ds9 episodes. initially, i’d sent him a list of ‘best’  episodes (my favorites AND the eps i thought were most emblematic of ds9′s issues--bajor’s relationship with cardassia, trill relationships, etc) hoping that he’d be able to see the merit of the show, but he insisted on re-watching the first episode before he started working on the list because he’d only seen it once a long time ago, and then, after watching ep 1 and captive pursuit (with tosk) decided that he’d try to watch the full first season, especially after i expressed my dismay at realizing he wouldn’t get the chronological introduction to garak bc ep 3 wasnt on my list of best episodes. anyway. he showed me this list of written reactions after watching ep 1 and captive pursuit and it made me so happy he decided he’d keep doing it, which i insisted wasn’t necessary because it seems to me like a lot of work (and which i still feel guilty about) but he was like told me that he’d only seldom seen me as happy as i was upon reading that and it was something little he could do to foster that joy which.. makes my heart crack in two). 

anyway. the real reason i started this post was because ive been up in arms for the past few days about mia and covid. 

speaking of which. 

baby ‘passed’ first covid test. that arrow on the side is the minimized player where im watching nemesis. hah. 

anyway. 

to make a longer story short, my (pregnant!!!) sister decided, stupidly, to go with her boyfriend abe, a sound engineer, to a broadcast stage he was setting up in california, because she has a liver condition that appeared during her pregnancy which makes giving birth difficult (which is emotionally challenging for her because she had always wanted to do an at-home birth without drugs) and in fact, is a condition which typically leads to the birth having to be induced early, which means, at this point in development, that she could potentially need to have the child at any time. she went with him because she didn’t want to be without him if the baby needed to come. she was there for a week, with the both of them feeling sick all the while, and then came home early without abe because she felt bad and wasnt having fun, eventually getting a ride from my mother (who lives with my grandmother and great aunt, 93 and 86 respectively) back home from the airport (she took a PLANE!?). anyway. at our insistence, she was tested the same day she got home. she was reluctant to do it because she ‘didn’t think she had it’ and figured that it was ‘just the flu, honestly’ as if she had any way of knowing that???? in the day she was waiting for her test results, she came out of her room multiple times without a mask on, walking around the kitchen or playing with the dogs, even though we told her to stay in her room (and had brought her food/hot tea/whatever else she needed). she had no reason to come out when she was 1. sick and 2. not quite sure if she had covid or not

anyway. her test came back positive so she was trying to ‘stay in her room’, which lasted for.. not even a day. nick and i, who hadn’t seen either of them in a week, but had been around each other, got tests. we (as pictured) both got negative results, so mia must have gotten it in california rather than from someone we’d all seen (like nick and mia’s dad or stepmother earlier in the month) 

abe came home soon after and had taken two rapid tests when he landed, but then, when coming home, immediately was sitting in the same room as my sister, without a mask on. he slept outside in our ‘arizona room’--a screened in patio with a futon in it for the first night. when his results came back (as negative), he decided that he was fine to be in the house, so wouldn’t wear a mask in the kitchen or in the living room, (something nick and i both did) AND would also be in the same room as my sister for long periods of time. i’d like to think he was wearing a mask in there, but i can’t be sure. he was playing video games in their shared room where mia was watching tv, as long as he (AND I QUOTE) ‘stayed in his corner’. it’s a ten by ten room at most. there’s no way that staying in there, even with a mask on, for as long as he did was a smart option. so... to reiterate. abe was in a room with my sister, who has covid, for a long period of time, and then wouldn’t wear a mask when in the common areas that everyone uses. which is... great right

and the thing thats been annoying me for these last couple of days in particular, ASIDE from all the dumb shit they’ve done up to this point, is that mia says abe needs to bring her food (valid) and YET mia is always in the kitchen (which doesn’t make sense). i was in the kitchen preparing a meal the other day and she came out to refill her water. which, if abe was functioning SOLELY to bring her things, as she was insisting, would not have warranted her coming out of her room. it was the middle of the day. she could have said she needed water and left her cup by the door and i could have refilled it and brought it back.... but she didn’t. i was wearing two masks (a cloth one over a medial grade one) but was still wary about her being there--because I was making food. i told her to get out of the kitchen because she’d finished getting her water, but she said ‘just a minute!!’ and continued, not three feet away from me, trying to pick up one of the dogs and playing with her. i kept telling her to go back to her room but she was acting as though i was being rude and being completely unreasonable??? she takes every request we make for her to stay away from us as a personal attack, like we don’t want to see her or be around her, instead of us trying to protect ourselves from covid?? 

THEN the fun part is after all this, abe sets up an inflatable mattress in the office (which is :) right :) next :) to my room) because he decides he doesn’t want to sleep in the same room as mia (reasonable) despite having been occupying the same room as mia for hours (STUPID). so now abe is using the hall bathroom, which nick and i use/shower in/brush our teeth in. before, abe had been using mia’s bathroom off the bedroom, and, again, had been sleeping in there. so now, if abe DID catch it from mia, which is likely, at this point, he’d going to give it to nick and i.

nick and i were upset about this, and told mia last night that she needed to stay in her room. that was how people quarantined. that is how you quarantine. you do not leave your room for ANY reason, especially if you have 1. MULTIPLE PEOPLE CAPABLE AND WILLING TO BRING YOU FOOD AT ANY TIME OF DAY and 2. A BATHROOM THAT CONNECTS TO YOUR ROOM. she came out and started yelling at us about abe, though neither of us wanted to fight with her (and there was no reason to fight about something we were CLEARLY right about). she said ‘YOU CANT HAVE IT BOTH WAYS’ which meant that abe can’t not use the livingroom and the hall bathroom (which we were saying he shouldnt do) and that he can’t be in quarantine with mia (stay with her in her room) but the thing is.... BECAUSE he has spent so much time with her, and because they weren't wearing masks when they were outside and BECAUSE he spent hours playing video games in the room that my sister has been quarantined in for a whopping two days--he now shouldnt ALSO be using our bathroom, because now we can get sick. (and probably fucking will!!!!) she is having him now stay in the office and use our bathroom (GREAT) instead of just biting the bullet and staying with her because he ALREADY HAD BEEN staying with her 

and now they are both in the kitchen :)! i can hear them from my room. great. 

anyway here r some sketches that i never uploaded before cause theyre hideous but im putting here because i hope to fuck no one actually reads this/scrolls down this far

#captain's log #it does not compute to me #that you can just be this fucking stupid #i hate her #i am SO fucking mad at her about this i dont want to live here :)

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

tw/venting

ayo the thought of having to go back to school in a little over a month is fucking wild. like.....i feel like i just got out of school and binge watched invincible for the first time. IT FEELS LIKE YESTERDAY. it’s extremely scary thinking about how fast time is passing by because i keep doing the same thing everyday. there’s barely any change in anything. not allowed outside. my IRL friends arent vaxxed yet, and even if they were, my mom’s suspicious of my intentions when going out. and lets not get into the fact that school doesnt stress me out as much, but i’ll be damned if i dont have awful test anxiety still. i feel like everything is fucking passing me by and that sucks ASS. my classmates are going out to beaches and shit, and posting on insta (good for them, i probably need to touch some grass) but like?? i feel like im just being robbed of my life. and teen years and all that. 

i know the pandemic has been hard for LITERALLY everyone. (if you said 2020 was a good year, hush, you’re alone in that regard bestie, dont wanna hear it) but i just......im finally recognizing feelings and all that (shit’s scary man) my thoughts dont match my body whatsoever (not dysphoria, its derealization, or something similar). thats so scary to me. sometimes i catch myself in the mirror and im talking and im like...”thats not me.....oh fuck, it is me.” so i dont look in the mirror and talk aloud, is what im saying. i’ll have a breakdown. but im extremely extroverted. i love people, and seeing people and hugging people. and not feeling like every day that i spend inside of my fucking house is a waste of time because time travel doesnt exist and i cant get any of these days back. at all. it is a never ending cycle. i just want a hug, dude. i’ve never experienced cuddling before either. i would love to platonically cuddle someone. but i got rid of toxic friends (still not over it) and got very radicalized...but for what. my own knowledge and betterment.....but eh. plus i traumadump, nobody wants to hear my sob story, i need to hush. and get in contact with my therapist. and discuss my anxiety issues. and possible depression. and PTSD and so many other things because it’s really not cute. anyways.

also heyy, my body issues are back. like?? hello. not that they ever went away, they just steep for a bit, then start boiling back. and that’s torture for me. having a generally okay body is fine, but then i realize that when i do wear pants, they’re either my overalls (comfort and queerness) or jeans. and yay those are tighter than they were last time. and i know weight fluctuation is a thing that happens, but i really feel like i could do more to not feel as bad. (i mean, sure, i could, but exercising makes me feel horrible mentally so). i see classmates thin and everything (i know thin isnt always healthy, but a part of me wishes that i was bone thin, we wont talk about it) and i know “every body is a bikini body” and i support that initiative 1,000 percent, but A. i have no idea if my parents would even let me get one if i wanted one (i dont) and B. i dont have the confidence to wear something like that. i even hate the fucking swimsuit that i have. i want the fucking full length victorian swimsuits with a shirt and fucking shorts because i cant stand being exposed. my stomach pokes out too much. my arms arent muscly like they were some years back. i just feel....so weird. and the “oh she’s smart, she cant be hot.” one or the other type shit that my brain keeps trying to tell me is real ia NASTY. like heyyy i have a brain, and i use it most days, but my body also shouldnt be fuckshitted like this. this collection of skin and bones keeps me safe (but not from my brain, its on some different shit)

another thing is that i can not wear exposing things. ugh, i would feel so just....out in the open. im literally scared of someone coming behind me and fucking groping me, or slapping my ass. (valid fear) but i literally fucking HATE feeling like that. one, I AM UNDERAGED, and two, ITS NASTY EITHER WAY. and if i went to school, and wore something mildly form fitting, i’d be pushing my body forward to look less noticeable (i dont trust seniors), or pulling my jacket down (i always wear jackets in school) so people arent looking at me. that sucks. and i wish i didnt make my anxiety that bad as to where it just sucks to exist. with a human flesh prison that looks a certain way. i kinda just want to hide my body. permanently. (not dysphoria related, my tits are fine, if they stay, cool, if they don’t, cool) but like...ugh.

and this is where it gets EXTREMELY dark, trigger warning for suicide mention.

yeah last year on the first week of school (virtual) i really wanted to kill myself. which like..isnt okay. i havent really told anyone about that either. because it was an extremely low point for me. i just didn’t think that i could fucking make it through the entire year. all those assignments, and all those days, wasted. im not learning anything valuable (besides maybe science and finance)...i dont know what the fuck i want to do with my life. there’s no such thing as ethical consumption so i’m gonna be contributing to something fucked up, no matter what i do. im weird. and political. and opinionated. and into so many different things. which, y’know, should be cool and fun and fresh. but it terrifies me to know that other people arent like me. that they many never understand my interests. and i feel like this with EVERYONE in EVERY class. unless i see a similar interest. or a tiny flag. but the thought of introducing myself again and again. to more people. who i may never fucking see again. who probably dont care about me. kinda discourages you a bit. so yeah, i really wanted to off myself. it seemed so impossible to get through everything. and then heyyy, near the end of the year, something really shitty happened. was depressed. told my mom i may be autistic... “okay...well....getting diagnoses takes a lot of money. so unless you have 700 bucks laying around....then no.” (who says the person who may ALSO be autistic along with me) few weeks back, talking about my therapist who wanted to talk through the DSM-4 with me “you really think you’re autistic huh.” of course mom. why else would i have written a paper about it, followed actually autistic accounts, and done research on it.

then near the next year, i sucked even more ass. friend shit broke me down and i felt....like i fucked up. which i did. and like i cant keep people in my life. (which is partially true) and i felt more physically exhausted than i had in literal years. i feel very deeply, and especially with negative emotions. so that really fucked me up. (may be something more serious, i have no idea) so there’s that. i just....i’ve never felt like i had been so awful in some time. like i let everyone around me down. so no more of /those/ situations. i dont sleep correctly when my hair is wet, so you can imagine how my dreams were THAT night.

but yeah, i dont feel like wanting to kill myself again. because i know it’s not worth it. but something just keeps pulling me deeper into these disgusting pits of awfulness. like there’s no other way out. (wrong) and gritting my teeth and willing myself to do things is going to hurt, but it’s quite literally the only choice i have. i cant give up. so there’s that. my thoughts and everything. yeah.....it’s 5:10 in the morning, im going the fuck to sleep.

[skittymon]

Finally finished Tales of Eternia!! 

And that makes 11th tales games finished and 15th overall played in some degree (Phantasia, Legendia, Innocence, and DotNW being the ones I havent finished yet).

Once I started again in December I decided that instead of liveblogging I’d make a review at the end instead.

So here we go! I will keep this spoiler free as possible!

I’m pretty scatterbrained but I’ll try to divide this into: combat, story, characters, and other game mechanics.

Combat: So obviously, the combat is above Phantasia and Destiny’s, being made after them. I honestly have grown fond of the 2d linear style format. There’s so many different boss fights in this game that can only work in a 2d field rather than 3d. 

On the flip side, that’s not always a good thing. I count bosses like the wild dog thing in Vesperia, and Fodra Queen of Graces to be among the hardest mandatory boss fights in tales. Welp, Eternia added one to the ranks. Rem (aka Aska the light spirit) is one of the most frustrating boss fights I’ve done. Apart from constantly slowing healing itself, on the field it brings a shiny ball with it. You cannot destoy the orb, it’s there all fight, and if you touch it it hurts you. And of course it blocks the way to Rem. There is a way past it, it moves up and down so you just have to wait until its up to move past. BUT GUESS WHAT THE AI DOESNT DO. So your party will probably either be dying or constantly in pain. AND REM CAN MOVE THE ORD ANYWHERE. Also you cant physically hit Rem while its casting a spell only far away skills. So if you ever play this game just cheese it and spam variations of Sonic Blade.

Of course, on the flip side it’s every easy for you to cheese boss fights and just back them up into a corner unable to move or do anything until they die, so it evens out.

The sprite animations for the artes are gorgeous. Reid moves so fluidly in his artes, he’s honestly my third favorite protag to play as behind Yuri and Ludger because of this. The caster animations are great as well, granted it can become cluttered and hard to see in when artes like blizzard and earth shaker are used. BUT GOD DAMN I CAN WATCH MEREDY USE METEOR ALL DAY IT LOOKS SO COOL.

Nitpicks about the combat system are, Life, the reviving spell Farah has, takes to long to charge, and for Meredy and Keele to use healing artes you have to mix and match who has what craymel (spirit). There might be a guide but I didnt look beyond reddit so Life was the only resurrection spell I had. 

Last nitpick comes from the Aurora Artes. Aurora Artes are skills only Reid can use, but in order to use them you have to have health below 15% and press circle, square, and x at the same time, so it’s very easy to mess up and die. Then to use more Aurora Artes you press the same buttons repeatedly, and after you use them Reid is left with 1 hp. AND the final boss has an automatic kill skill, you have to press the buttons at the right time to activate it and keep everyone alive, or you can cheese it like I did and have Farah hold a reverse doll to revive her after she dies. Did I also mention this skill happens in phase 2 of the fight when the bosses health is less than 20,000 after starting from 300,000? If you fuck up thats like 10mins of redoing.

But to end on a better note for this section, I love the way artes are learned. You have to use certain artes a number of times before you can unlock it (I THINK abyss and vesperia and many others are like this but this is the first time I found it rewarding). I grinded like hell to get the best artes for Reid AND YOU BET IT WAS WORTH IT. Omega Demon Chaos I love you,,,,

Story: Like countless other Tales titles, the conflict comes from two worlds being at odds with each other. However this game does something that none of the other games have done with this story beat. Language barriers! It’s super cool in the first couple of hours theyre just trying to figure out how to talk with Meredy. Of course by the end this point is nearly dropped entirely, everyone else just getting the special ear ring I spent 3 hours to get so the plot can move on.

Like most tales, theres a moment you thought the story would end but BOOM the twist. I wasn’t shocked by it, but that’s because I knew who the final antagonist of the game was prior to playing it, but still it was executed well. 

Something that makes this Tales stand out is how they deal with backstory. So the main fours backstory is vital to the story and their characters but they don’t show it till like 20 hours in. It’s like if Graces you start off in main arc and learn about the childhood arc 2/3 of the way through and went “ohhhh that’s why they were distant with each other.” And other stuff about it but I won’t spoil it.

Overall a good story, though I do feel like I’m missing things either from missing some side quests, or because of no skits.

Characters: The main ones to shine are the four main characters (Reid, Farah, Keele, and Meredy), everyone else literally is either one dungeon and/or optionable. Chat does still feel like a character being the owner of the Van Elita aka means of transportation for half the game. Max and Ras tho rip. ESPECIALLY MAX. Ya know how every tales there’s the mandatory Talk Before The Final Battle? Yea well they all get one except Max. You see him, but he doesnt talk, YET THEY CRAYMELS DO.

Another odd, yet charming, thing is that there’s no big moment of character development for anyone like Luke cutting his hair, Magilou keeping the portal open, or punch in the face like Alvin. They just. Slowly change. And its really weird cause for all of disc 1 Keele is basically an unbearable asshole and he just? Learns to be a better person from everything he sees? There’s no callout or moment of realization, he just slowly learns and it’s super refreshing. 

Reid is probably one of the most relatable protagonists up there with Jude. I’m sure most of you know the “he doesn’t want to do shit lol” persona he has BUT GOD WHY HE’S LIKE THAT BABY I LOVE YOU. Farah’s personality is also explained in the backstory, so for any of you crestoria players that Farah’s backstory is really different like how Emil’s is, but the sentiment of why she’s like that is the same and stem for a similar event.

Meredy’s also great. I thought I’d get annoyed of her and her “You bet!” but god when she says it the last time at the end of the game, I was pretty moved. I wish I knew more about her backstory but I’m pretty sure a certain section of her life info was left to skits and ya know we didn’t get those till Symphonia :)))

As antagonists go, besides the Craymels who are there to test you before you get their power, there’s just two. Main boss and their lackey. The lackey is eh. You see him once at the beginning of the game, then see him destroy a  city, then one last time where you kill him. You do get his backstory and stuff but eh I’m usually not fond of tales mini villains minus Chimerad, God Generals, and Artorius’s lackeys

The main antagonist tho, I really don’t wanna spoil it but it’s hard to talk about why I’m conflicted on it without spoiling. So it’s like Destiny’s final boss but written better in some part and worse in others. So at one point it’s super emotional and pretty powerful with the message eternia wants to send but at the same points its a jrpg where you gotta kill god cause he doesn’t think humans are worth it. 

Oh one more thing thats honestly hilarious, there’s literally SINGLE animated cutscene by Production I.G in this entire game minus the op. 

Other things: the amount of mini games in this game is insane, but the amount you have to do IN JUST THE SECOND DISC to continue the plot is more than any other tales game I can recall. Some of them are fun like the card game, others like the bomb one I want to throw in a fire. 

There’s also so much Destiny pandering in this game. There’s portraits of the characters, you can collect lens, I’m 95% sure the way a certain character is done is because they wanted another Leon, you can SUMMON THE SWORDIAN USERS ARE AS AN ACTUAL SUMMON. While all Phantasia gets is the cameo battle and the Eternal Sword. I mean I didn’t mind cause I’ve finished Destiny and it’s one of my fav tales games but damn it was pretty obvious. 

EXPLORATION IS SO FUN IN THIS GAME. Mainly near the end when you have free reigns. YOU CAN DIVE UNDERWAY AND EXPLORE THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA WHAT OTHER TALES GAME LETS YOU DO THAT??? 

In conclusion: A fun game! I don’t think it was worth 133 dollars tho consider my play file was 35 hours and thats with a good chuck of side quests and ex bosses. Probably in my top 5 combat systems of tales and final villains, but not in terms of story or characters. A really hope it gets remastered soon I’d love for more people to play it.

#skitty rambles #tales of #tales of series #tales of eternia

[sporesgalaxy]

You know what? Fuck it. Here's the whole ass WIP script for the Danny Phantom/Ben 10/Deadpool crossover nightmare, which is called #follow ur crossover dreams, by the way. I think copy-pasting on my phone is gonna delete some italics but whatever.

Reminder that it's still a really early draft with a lot I plan on changing (wade Motormouth wilson doesnt say nearly enough bullshit, for starters), but hopefully u will enjoy it. happy birthday to me, my gift is letting myself share ideas without maximum effort

[BEN is running through a crowd of high school students, excitedly. He is on his phone] BEN: C'mon, Gwen, just tell me where to go! I wanna fight some bad guys today! It's been weeks! [GWEN is on a computer] GWEN: Ben, for the last time, you are NOT going into this alone! We aren't even sure what's causing this yet! Seismic activity at this scale is totally unheard of around here, and whatever's causing it-- BEN: Is gonna get it's butt whooped by the one and only Benn Tennyson! BEN: Don't worry, I can totally handle this! GWEN: Yeah, cause things always work out perfectly  when you say that. BEN: Just give me the location, and you can catch up with me there! GWEN: No, Ben. I'll fill you in when we know more, but.until then, don't run off. [BEN is dejectedy watching TV at home, when suddenly, there is another earthquake. Soon after, a newswoman reveals the epicenter just outside of town, and Ben gets an idea] [BEN gets off a public bus at a bus stop far outside of town. He looks out into a dry hilly wilderness, and down to his phone gps to confirm he is going in the right direction.] BEN: all right...I didn't wanna risk timing out before I got there, but I think I'm close enough now... [BEN places his phone gps at his feet, closes his eyes, and slaps the Omnitrix] [BEN transforms into Stinkfly] BEN: Well, I was hoping for XLR8, but I guess I can work with this? [BEN picks up his phonr and flies off] [when he reaches the epicenter BEN finds, embedded into a large hill, an abandoned lab of some sort.] BEN: ooOh [BEN enters the lab, and shortly times out, becoming human again. He sort of tries to sneak, but is clearly too excited/curious to be very effective] [The lab is full of rusting, inscruitable equiptment. Finally, Ben enters a natural cave turned testing area deep inside the lab, a cavernous room machinery littering the floor. There seems to be a fixation on machinery that we would recognize as Danny's parents' portal, but not embedded into a wall, so like a door attatched to a tube. Spare parts and dissasembled prototypes rest along the edges of the room, and a few assembled peices rest towards one end.] [Ben stands on the far south end of the cave, looking around at all of the strange wiring and such.] BEN: I wonder if this is Plumber tech... [BEN kicks a bundle of cords on the floor, and the sound echoes through the room.] [Then, a stranger sound eminates from somewhere just outside of the cavern. And another, similar, closer sound is accompanied by a visible flash. And then-- in a green streak, DANNY bursts into the air in the cavernous space, and then hits the floor and skids. When he stops, he turns human as he falls unconscious] [BEN has no fucking idea what is going on] BEN: uh...h...HEY. ARE YOU...OKAY? DANNY: ... BEN: HELLO? HELO-O? DP: ya think he's dead? BEN: AUGH!!!! [BEN jumps violently, very surprised by Deadpool's presence, and takes a step back] BEN: Who the heck are you?! DP: Call me Deadpool! [BEN gives him a look of utter disbelief. That is the stupidest superhero name he's ever heard. He's about to say that, but then,] DANNY: [groans] DP: [hops down. Puts a hand out, signalling for Ben to stay] Stay here, kid. [Ben is offended to be belittled even if it's reasonable. He stands with an angry look on his face for a moment before following just a few steps behind deadpool, hand at the ready above his watch.] [DP veeery cautiosly walks over to Danny and then....abruptly switches gears, standing up straight and gently bumping the boy's shoulder with his foot] DP: hey. hey. get up. DANNY: five more minutess.... DP: ...7Your mom made pancakes? [DANNY's eyebrows furrow. He groans again. He props himself up, and rubs his head. He's covered in dirt and some blood. He opens his eyes and his expression is full of exhaustion and dread as he processes his unfamiliar surroundings. He looks up at Deadpool] DANNY: ...........I don't smell any pancakes. [DEADPOOL and DANNY stare at eachother for a moment. DANNY seems to be waiting for something. He suddenly looks at BEN, incredulous] DANNY: So are either of you going to attack me, or are we having a staring contest? BEN: I dunno, are YOU going to attack? [DANNY is so tired. He's had a long day] DANNY: I'd prefer not to, but it tends to happen a lot. DP: Well that's depressing! BEN: Well if none of us are fighting, I have a question. BEN: Where'd you two come from? DANNY: Ghost portal. DP: Time travel. BEN: ... BEN: You're not giving me much to work with, here. [BEN points to DANNY] BEN: Especially you. I get time travel, I can live with that-- DP: Thank god. BEN: --But, "ghost portal?" Like a portal for ghosts? Are you dead?? [DP slowly prods Danny with his foot again. Danny is too busy suddenly realizing that he's in human form to be concerned with that] DANNY: I--uh-- BEN: Was that what was up with the green energy? DANNY: Maybe I just went through the ghost portal, ok? I--where are we? BEN: Somewhere on the outskirts of Bellwood, Nevada. DANNY: Nevada? BEN: Nevada DANNY: Huh. DANNY: And why are you here? BEN: [excited to sound smart] There was some unnatural seismic activity around here, and I came to check it out, see if it was anything nefarious. BEN: [cocky] You know, usual superhero stuff. [Danny is a little shocked. He's never really met another superhero before, who wasn't a clone, or accusing Danny of being evil or something] DANNY: oh. BEN: What? DANNY: You're...you're really a superhero? DP: You're like 12 is that safe? [What is the deal with all these young superheroes but say it funnier] BEN: I'm 16!!! DP: Children trying to be superheroes never works out well, trust me kid. BEN: I'm not a child!! Why do you care, huh? DP: Cause I hang out with a lot of superheroes and the heroism business has never done anyone's mental health ANY favors. [DANNY puts his hed in his hands] DANNY: Ugh, tell me about it. BEN: Ha! You AREN'T a normal kid! DANNY: oops. BEN: What can you do?? Do you have GHOST POWERS? [DANNY bites his lip] DANNY: What about you? Do you have powers? BEN: I can turn into any of hundreds of aliens! DANNY: ...care to show me? [BEN looks at the Omnitrix. It's still timed out] BEN: ...in theory... [Danny raises an eyebrow] [meanwhile, Deadpool loses interest. He starts climbing on stuff, looking at the scattered tech.] BEN: Uhhh...can it wait a minute? I just flew here. DANNY: What?? BEN: [gestures to watch, grinning sheepishly] Alien tech! BEN: I swear I'll show you later. What about you! Show me yours! [Deadpool arches an eyebrow at them in the distance] DANNY: ...I guess, since you already guessed it... BEN: What are you so worried about? Ha, haven't you ever met another superhero before? [Ben was sort of kidding, but...] DANNY: BEN: DANNY: Uh, no. Not really. BEN: ...So do you fight bad guys all on your own? DANNY: Uh, yeah? I'm kinda the only person who can. [Reconsiders, and adds with bitterness] Well, the only one who can and will. [Ben thinks about that for a second. He knows how it feels to think you're the only person who can save the world, but Ben is usually wrong when he assumes that's the case. He doesn't like imagining how he'd feel without all the support he's gotten in his hero-ing career. He's genuinely concerned for Danny.] [Danny notices the concern in Ben's expression. Ben seems to be about to say something, but Danny suddenly feels insecure about being pitied. He finally stands up, brushing himself off] DANNY: But like, I have friends, and plenty of tech they can use to help me out. I'm just the only...I guess I'm the only superpowered person willing to deal with fighting ghosts all the time, okay? Whatever! I've been at it for 2 years, I'm used to it. [Ben then adds something together in his head] BEN: Wait, have you never heard of me? Ben 10? DP: Wow! Humble! BEN: No, seriously! Never? Have you ever seen any aliens? DANNY: Uh, no? BEN: Where are you from? DANNY: Colorado. BEN: I've saved the world, like, several times. [DANNY and DP raise an eyebrow each] BEN: Publicly!! People know about me! I'm a big deal!! This is--You guys aren't from here. I need to take you to the Plumbers, so we can-- [A portal powers up again. DANNY seems to suddenly remember something. He goes stiff] DANNY: Oh no. BEN: What? Is that the Ghost Portal? DANNY: Yeah. And you're about to meet the guy who punched me through it. [DP rejoins them to look at the threat] DP: Oh, now that you two have your shit figured out, I should mention I'm from another universe. BEN: WHAT! You said time travel! DP: Yeah, time travel gone horribly, horribly wrong. BEN: How??? I've time travelled a few times and never seen anyine mess it up that bad. DANNY: Yeah since when does time travel take you to other universes? DP: OH SO WE'RE ALL TIME TRAVEL EXPERTS HERE ARE WE??? I'm not telling you two how to live YOUR lives! DP: How about I start bragging about being a superhero expert! Neither of you even know what an X-man *IS!* BEN: Like from the comics? [DP looks at Ben. He won't say it out loud but his expression says "WHAT THE FUCK DUDE"] [BEN shrugs]

[time to get DISJOINTED!!! Here's 2 comic transcripts]

...[some fighting I havent written yet]...

DP: DANNY WHY IS YOUR GHOST DAD SO HOT?? DANNY: HE'S NOT MY DAD. PLEASE DON'T CALL HIM THAT, IT'S A WHOLE *THING* WITH HIM-- [VLAD beams] VLAD: Now, Daniel, is that any way to speak to your father?? DANNY: SEE?! Now he'll never shut up about it! VLAD: I've had enough of your sass, young man! You're GROUNDED. [VLAD spikes Danny into the ground HARD.] [DP is pissed off now. He reaches for his katanas.] DP: Ok I get the picture.

...[more unwritten fighting]...

VLAD: Well, now that I have your undivided attention-- [DANNY has just been punched into the ground. He's sitting up, now] DANNY: --You can start the evil monologue. Joy. VLAD: Evil is such a reductive word. Don't you ever get tired of being beaten half to death to protect people that couldn't care less if you lived or died? [DANNY stands up, with some difficulty] DANNY: You *would* think having a conscience is exhausting. [VLAD is taking a lazy step towards Danny every few moments] VLAD: ...Have you noticed where we are, Daniel? VLAD: Because it isn't Amity Park. It's not even in the same universe as Amity Park. VLAD: And it's not anywhere your idiot father will ever bother finding, seeing as it has nothing whatsoever to do with ghosts. [VLAD is standing over Danny, now] VLAD: Do you know what that means, my boy? VLAD: Nothing I do here can spoil my reputation. VLAD: And none of your little friends are coming to save you. [VLAD places a hand on Danny's shoulder, gripping too tight] VLAD: So VLAD: I'm going to make you the same offer I made you the night of the reunion VLAD: One. Last. Time. VLAD: Either abandon Jack and let me teach you how to really use your powers, [VLAD summons some ghostly energy between his hand and Danny's shoulder] VLAD: Or force me to make poor, dear Maddie file a missing person's report that will never be resolved.

[wow direct segue into comic!]

..[just a tad more unwritten fighting]...

[Vlad has Ben by the neck very far up in the air, and Ben is frantically pressing his Omnitrix] VLAD: [cackles] Goodness, I think your powers might be even more tempermental than Daniel's! It's a little sad, honestly. I was looking forward to a real challenge for once. DP: [on the ground, a distance away] Superpowers shmuperpowers [cocks gun, and fires a couple of shots at Vlad] [Vlad was watching DP talk, unimpressed. He becomes intangible, clearly no longer interested in Ben, allowing him to plummet to his death] [After becoming tangible again, and without breaking eye contact, in a flash of pink energy, Vlad is right in front of Deadpool, and violently pins him to a wall] DP: AWH, you can teleport?! That's not even fair!! VLAD: [close to Deadpools face, crushing his neck harder] No. It isn't. And that's just how I like it. DP: [choking] [thinking] don't say harder daddy don't say harder daddy don't say harder daddy [cut to Ben falling through the air, desperately, repeatedly smacking the Omnitrix] BEN: PLEASE WORK PLEASE WORK PL-- [Danny swoops in and catches him] BEN: [clinging to Danny, obviously spooked but trying to be cool] Thanks! DANNY: [amused] Don't mention it. [Danny puts Ben down on the ground] BEN: Um..where are your legs? DANNY: Oh, they uh...they just do that sometimes. DANNY: Is something wrong with your watch? BEN: [glares at the Omnitrix] It just does this, sometimes. [Danny sees something coming] DANNY: Well you'd better fix it fast! [Ben looks up just as Danny turns them both intangible, seconds before Deadpool is sent hurtling through them and into the ground] [BEN is grinning, watching his hands as they turn re-tangible] BEN: That is SO COOL! I've only ever gotten to do that to myself! Y'know, as an alien! [DANNY was looking at DP's crater, but turns to BEN, surprised at the genuine enthusiasm] DANNY: [maybe blushing a little?] Uh, thanks! [BEN grins at him, and Danny smiles back. They're cute.] [Deadpool's hand pops out of the crater, waving (flailing)...reassuringly?] DP: Don't worry about me, all he did was break [groans] most of my bones. [Danny grabs Ben and pulls him out of the way before Vlad fires an energy blast at Deadpool] VLAD: Still think you can manage without superpowers? [DP sits up painfully and slowly, and coughs] DP: Ac-- [Vlad hits him with a copious amount of energy blasts for an unnecessarily long time as he slowly lowers to the ground] [When Vlad lands and stops firing, he turns around to face Danny and Ben] VLAD: Where were we, Daniel? [Danny is horrified. He's gripping a fistful of Ben's shirt like his life depends on it, expecting to have to save him a third time. Ben is a bit shaken but still determined, and holds his hand at the ready over the Omnitrix] VLAD: ...That was rhetorical, my boy. I had just asked you a very simple question. VLAD: [turning his gaze to Ben] And I don't want to repeat myself. [Ben is not quite picking up on Vlad's thinly veiled threat. Danny, bug-eyed, follows Vlad's gaze to Ben, and is clearly absolutely terrified to be responsible for the deaths of two people he just met. Danny tightens his grip on Ben's shirt.] DANNY: ...I-- [a gunshot hits Vlad from behind. Vlad is completely shocked] [behind him, DEADPOOL is sitting up in the crater, charred to all hell but somehow still alive. He appears to only have one (barely) functioning arm left, which is holding the smoking gun] DP: I never said I didn't have any superpowers, jackass. [DP narrows his eyes] DP: I just like guns. [DP tries to shoot VLAD a few more times, but VLAD has turned intangible, and flies to a safer distance] Vlads gonna say some shit and run off Im not done yet but hoo boy. Oh man.

#void screaming #follow ur crossover dreams

[ineffablepjm]

No Panties - Pt.2

Notes - AHH IM SO HAPPY PART 1 DID SO WELL! YOU CAN READ IT HERE IF YOU HAVENT ALREADY DONE SO! HERE IS PART 2 I HOPE YOU ENJOY ITS ALSO PROBABLY TRASH COMPARED TO PART 1 BUT WHATEVA

Triggers - We got all types of smut in here, fingering, dirty talking, cum play, degrading words, unprotected raunchy sex (lord help me), angst, fluff, ya know

Word Count - 4.9k

2 weeks ago Jeon Jungkook had you on a science table with your legs spread open and his fingers buried in you. 2 weeks ago was the first time you stopped wearing panties to school. 2 weeks ago you began to avoid Jungkook at all costs. 

To this day your best friend Jimin knew nothing of what happened in the science classroom, all he knew, or so he thought he knew, was that Jungkook and you got into a heated, very heated, argument about him telling Namjoon to back off from you. It was difficult avoiding Jungkook especially since he tried his best to always run into you and catch even just a glimpse of you. He assumed that you avoided him because you were ashamed and because you didn’t feel the same way he did, but actually you avoided him because after that night you couldn’t stop thinking of him and the way he made you feel, but you feared rejection knowing his player past.

You closed up your locker and stared down at the flashcards in your hands, history, stupid fucking history. For some reason out of all the classes you had you struggled with history, I mean did you really need it? Your plan was to go to Yale for molecular biology, not for stupid fucking history. Your eyes focused on the words that connected to battles that happened centuries ago, to names that in some lifetime meant something to people, however, your studying was interrupted by a very enthusiastic Jimin. 

“____!!! Guess what?” He grinned and stared at you, your eyes met his and you cocked your eyebrow confused as to what he could be so excited about but since he received no answer from you he sighed. “Fine, well the dance team is in need of some money, so we’re doing a fundraiser.” He beamed. You nodded and smiled. 

“Don’t tell me, a carwash?” You plopped the flashcards into your bag and the two of you began to walk towards the 400 halls. 

“No silly, carwashes are for clubs that aren’t cool, but the dance team is super cool, Minho is hosting a party, tomorrow night, $5 for girls to get in and $10 for the boys.” He spoke. “Apparently his parents are out of town for the weekend and I don’t know if you’ve ever seen his house but it’s massive.” You smiled slightly and nodded. 

“A party? Your coach approved that?” You question. 

“Well technically no, he doesn’t know, we’re just going to collect the money and then show up with it and say we-- Well im not sure what we’ll say but something will be said. The point of all this ____ is that you need to come, it’ll be a raging party and who knows maybe you’ll run into Jungkook.” He winked. 

Jungkook. Your heart raced at the mention of his name and you shook your head. “I told you, I want nothing to do with him, ever since he told Namjoon that he needed to stay away I’ve made it my mission in life to forget him and not ever see him.” You sighed. “Anyway, yeah I’ll go only because you’re my best friend and I support your dance team, but I’m locking myself in a room and not coming out until people are so drunk that they don’t even notice me.” 

Jimin nodded and grinned. “Sounds good to me as long as you come, are you tutoring Namjoon today?” He asked, you nodded and then you pointed to the direction of your class, queue for your goodbye, then you waved. He chuckled and waved going the opposite direction. 

“Namjoon-ah...” You moaned and bit down on your lip softly as he pumped your orgasm out of you, he leaned over and pressed soft kisses to your neck. The two of you decided to take ‘tutoring’ somewhere else and no longer studied in the library, now you studied in the student parking lot in Namjoon’s car. His car had dark tinted windows and just to be extra safe he put his sun protector up on the windshield. 

Namjoon hummed and he pulled his fingers out from inside of you and he slipped his fingers into his mouth sucking away the juices. You watched him and then pulled down your dress. “When did you stop wearing panties?” He chuckled and smiled. “Not that I mind I was just surprised at the easy access.” You simply shrugged and smiled. 

“Being commando is easier than having underwear now.” You smiled. “By the way, there’s a party tomorrow at Minho’s house, it’s a fundraiser actually for the dance team, $10 for guys to get in if you wanna come, I’ll be there.” You smiled. In all honesty, you liked Namjoon, he was sweet and he made you feel good which was a bonus, but he didn’t give you any of the butterflies Jungkook did. Jungkook.

“Yeah, I’d love to come.” He smiled. “I’ll text you when I’m there so we can meet up.” You nodded at his reply and smiled. 

“See you then.” You waved at him and got out of his car throwing your bag over your shoulder. You walked over to the ledges of the courtyard and sat down waiting for Jimin to get out of practice, he was your ride home. You placed your bag on your lap and pulled out your agenda clearing things that were already done. You took notice of writing things down to keep things fresh in your memory, tests dates, tutorings with Namjoon, you even wrote down the date you and Jungkook met up, you glanced at it and sighed scribbling it out to make it less visible. You closed the agenda and looked up your eyes meeting his. Of fucking course. Immediately you stood and made your way towards the entrance of the school, the butterflies roaring in your stomach and your legs feeling like jelly.

“____!” He shouted. You kept walking. “____! Hey, I just wanna talk!” You sighed and reached the doors but when you pulled on them they were locked. You groaned and sighed slowly turning around to face Jungkook. “Why’re you avoiding me? And now running away from me?” He asked stepping in front of you his arms crossed over his chest. 

You looked at his face momentarily and groaned knowing he was too irresistible and you wouldn’t stand your ground by looking at him. “What do you want? You got what you wanted from me, so just leave me alone.” 

Jungkook looked slightly shocked and he shook his head. “I got what I wanted from you?” He questioned and rolled his eyes. “Seriously? Is that what you think this is?” 

“What else would it be? You bother the hell out of me all the damn time when we’re in school, and then once you get me to cum you move on I mean that’s what usually happens, so why aren’t you following normal procedure? You clearly only want to fuck and like I told you,  Im a virgin so I won't fuck you.” You snapped your jaw tightening. Jungkook looked away and he scoffed slightly and rolled his eyes. 

“You know what those weren’t my original intentions but you’re right, why the hell don’t I just move on? Wouldn’t wanna stick my cock in a slut anyway. I’ll let Namjoon have some of that instead.” He growled and stared at you intently, the words hit you like a shit ton of bricks and you stared at him, your blood boiled and you smacked him, the sound echoing through the awning. Your hand stung from the contact and you could see the pink shade quickly appearing on his cheek.

“Don’t ever fucking disrespect me like that again Jeon Jungkook.” You spat and quickly walked away from him the tears brimming your eyes. “Asshole.” You murmured and decided to just walk home. Jungkook cupped his cheek and you couldn’t believe you just did that, he had no reason to call you a slut, but he was jealous, more jealous than he had ever been I mean for fucks sake he saw you coming out of Namjoon’s car flushed just like you had been in the science room. He turned to see you walking away and he shook his head. 

“Fuck!” He yelled out and bit down on his lip. He turned around and saw a few people still looking at him but he didn’t give them any mind. Jungkook marched over to his car stepping into and then he slammed his hand down on the steering wheel. “Fucking dammit.” He groaned out and then rubbed his face. He turned on the engine of the car and drove off to Yoongi’s house.

The house looked empty from the outside, not many cars surrounded it and the music couldn’t be heard outside either. You stepped onto the trail and walked up to the door knocking softly, one of Jimin’s dance mates opened the door and smiled, he allowed you in without paying since you were Jimin’s guest. “Come on in love.” 

Immediately the hot air hit you and you groaned stepping in through the hall. Your eyes widened as you saw the number of people already at the party, bodies danced, drank, smoked and most even kissed. You looked around for Jimin but had yet to find him so instead, you went towards the kitchen and pulled out a bottle of water. You uncapped it and took a chug your eyes scanning the room, and then you saw Jimin. He was talking to a girl, her hand resting on his arm and you smirked softly. He was always quick to get girls to come to him, so instead of bothering him, you decided to try and find a room to stay in.

You followed a couple who was set off to find a room just like you, you watched as they disappeared into a room and you began to open doors trying to find an empty room. Most where packed and had people in them, but finally you found an empty room. You stepped in and sat down on the bed, you sighed softly and heard the thumping off the music before laying down and pulling your phone out.

You: Hey! Are you planning to come tonight?

Joon: I’m actually walking in right now, where are you?

You: some room in a hall, idk 😅 find me?

Joon: coming

You smiled softly at the texts and within moments you felt the door opened and you saw Namjoon. “Hey!” You smiled and he walked in shutting the door behind him.

“Hey, beautiful.” He smiled and came towards the bed where you sat up. He sat down and looked at you. “Jimin was looking for you, but when I told him I was gonna meet you, he kinda just laughed and walked off.” Namjoon shrugged.

You laughed and shook your head. “God he’s such a doof.” Namjoon looked at you as you laughed and smiled.

“____, you’re so beautiful.” He whispered and you blushed looking at him. “I’m sorry, I know we don’t usually get into our feelings but I just— I really like you.” He mumbled and softly held your hand. Your eyes met his and you continued to blush, you didn’t want to be rude and tell him you didn’t feel the same way but it wasn’t fair to lead him on either. “I know you might not feel the same, and it’s okay, but I just want you to know that I’m here..” You nodded at his words and then rubbed his knuckles.

“I know Joon... my feelings are really all over the place right now, and with school and all it’s really hard to focus on anything else..” You explained, technically it wasn’t all a lie. “You know the first person I go to after Jimin is you and there isn't anyone who I would rather spend time at this party with.” He nodded and without any warning, he pushed his lips onto yours. Your eyes widened and you were shocked but then decided to kiss him back, your hand cupped his cheek and the two of you intensified the kiss. His tongue slipped into your mouth and you pushed it a bit with yours, he moved his body over yours and you lay down your hands going up to his hair. Namjoon and you had never shared kisses before it was purely just his hand in your pants, but this was different, he wanted more passion, more than just you feeling good. 

His hands traveled down to your pants and he began to unbutton them, he gently pushed them down to your knees and his hand met your cloth covered clit softly rubbing it, you moaned into the kiss and your hips bucked up into his touch. You pulled away from the kiss and your eyes met him, Namjoon’s hand slipped into your underwear and as usual, his finger slipped into you, you moaned softly and closed your eyes. He began to pump you slowly and then he increased his speed, the feeling Namjoon was giving you didn’t compare to the feeling that Jungkook had given, you missed it, the way he pushed two fingers in you and pumped you with no remorse and the dirty words that followed his actions, the way his tongue flicked on your clit, the noises that were so cynically sounding through the classroom and the way he tasted you and finally had you taste yourself. “Kook-ah..” you moaned out imagining it was him buried between your legs, you didn't even realize you moaned out the wrong name when it all stopped. You opened your eyes and looked at Namjoon. “What’s wrong?” You stared at the boy whose eyes were wide and jaw was dropped.

“You’re joking right?” His gaze changed and he rolled his eyes getting off the bed, you were slightly confused until you realized and you covered your mouth. “This is a fucking joke.” He growled. “Tell me you didn’t just fucking moan Jungkook’s name.”

You quickly shook your head. “I’m so sorry Joon... I didn’t mean to, I swear.” He scoffed and then stormed out of the room. You watched him go and you pulled up your pants quickly running after him. “Namjoon!!” You yelled out but he ignored you and kept on walking. “Namjoon please!” You yelled and some couples around in the hall noticed. You sighed softly and let him go. You placed your hand on your forehead and then shook your head. What did I do? You stomped your foot cursing at yourself under your breath and leaning against the wall. Your gaze moved up to the crowds and you tried to spot Jimin again, but no luck. Instead, you saw Jungkook staring back at you, he was with a girl, he was smirking whispering things to her yet his eyes never left yours.

You imagined he was being dirty, telling her how he wants to go somewhere private where they could talk, and that would turn into kissing and then fucking. Your blood boiled because this was all his fault if it wasn’t for him you and Namjoon would still be in the room. His eyes scanned your body and you noticed he stared at your pants, you looked down realizing you never buttoned your pants and if he had seen Namjoon stormed off he probably knew what was happening. Jungkook shook his head and he wrapped his arm around the girl's waist and they disappeared into the crowd. You groaned and turned around finding your way back to the room. Once in you shut the door and threw yourself on the bed. Your eyes shut and you just thought about everything, did you really have to avoid Jungkook? I mean you could’ve just given in and let him do whatever he wanted to but you loved yourself too much to just to that. But what did self-love have to do with anything? If you loved yourself you would let Jungkook fuck you so good you couldn’t walk the next morning. 

The music thumping as getting increasingly louder and you wondered if any of Minho’s neighbors would notice, but they were a pretty great distance from him and the house was large so it was unlikely they cared, you were sure somewhere in the house the music couldn’t be heard. So instead of sulking you picked yourself up and left the room in search of a more quiet place. You noticed the stairs at the end of the hall and you climbed up them, more doors were upstairs and you wondered how a person could have such a large house and not get lost in it. Straight ahead you saw a room, but this room was different, the doors were double and it looked like it would lead to some fancy dance hall or something. You looked around to see if anyone would see you sneaking into this room and when you saw no one you opened up the door and slipped in. 

Your jaw dropped as you took in the surroundings, a large bed was smack center of the room, a chandelier hung above it and a large mirror was on one wall. You made your way to the bed and softly touched the comforter with your hand before taking a seat. You couldn’t get Jungkook out of your mind anymore, and even though you had slapped him the last time you encountered him you still wanted him, the thought of him with another girl made your blood boil but how could you ask him to come to meet you when you were still on thin ice with him. Your heart raced as you thought about texting him to come to this room. The better side of you told you do not, to just stay in here until the party died, but there was a side of you who insisted you texted him, who insisted you brought him here. 

You: Jk, upstairs, large double doors. 

That was all you said. You would give him a few minutes to show up before you would decide to just sleep or just watch a movie on your phone. Instead of just sitting here and waiting you stepped into the large walk-in closet and looked at all the clothes hung up. Some were men's clothes, but the majority were women, brands you’d never even heard of, and clothes with tags still on them. You didn’t touch in fear that something might ruin them but admiring them was enough. Your feet took you into the bathroom and you gawked at how large and fancy it was. A large tub with jets and beside it a nice shower, double sinks and all. You smiled at the thought of having such a nice bathroom-- 

“____...” His voice soft and velvety. Your heart raced and you could feel your knees weakening. “____.” He spoke again a bit louder this time. 

“Jungkook.” You called out making your way back through the closet and then into the room where he stood. God, he was so mesmerizing. “Jungkook.” You said again stepping into the room and he turned to look at you. 

“Look ____, I’m so sorry, I should’ve never called you a slut, I just, I saw you with Namjoon---” 

“Stop.” You mumbled stepping closer to him and shaking your head. “I don’t care it doesn’t matter.” Your hand took his and you smiled softly. “Jungkook, I want you, more than anything I’ve wanted in a really long time I can't stop thinking about you, can't stop picturing you, and it’s hard to like you because well you have a reputation and that scares me.” You spoke.

Jungkook nodded and then sighed. “I know... But I swear, for you, I’d change.” He mumbled his hand interlocking with yours. 

His words were exactly what you wanted to hear but you also knew that it was hard to believe someone like him would change just for you. “You’d have to prove that to me.” You whispered and he cupped your cheek. 

“I will.” He smiled and then leaned down pressing his lips onto yours there was more that you wanted to say to him but his lips meeting yours made your worries go away, for now at least. His kiss was hesitant, scared even as if he took things too far you’d run away. Your hand softly slid up to the back of his neck and you pulled him towards you encouraging the kiss. He hummed softly and wrapped one arm around your waist and the other moved down to your thigh where he encouraged you to jump up, which you did wrapping your legs around his waist. 

Jungkook pushed his tongue passed your lips as he walked towards the wall with the mirror. He pressed your back up against the cold glass and you shivered, he pulled away from the kiss his lips going to your neck where he softly left wet kisses, he settled on a spot behind your ear where he began to suck and nip at. Your hand tangled in his hair and gave him a soft tug whining out his name. He pulled away from your neck once satisfied with the color of the mark and with his free hand he began to pull of your shirt, you helped him and threw it on the ground, he pulled you away from the mirror, where you unhooked your bra and threw it down. Jungkook let out a sigh as he admired your naked torso. His free hand softly caressed each one of your breasts before settling on a nipple and giving it a pinch. “You’re so beautiful.” He mumbled. 

Your hands traveled down to the hem of his shirt and you pulled it off revealing his toned body, you admired the way his stomach flexed as he held you and you could feel the dampness in your jeans intensify. He noticed your gaze and smirked softly but didn’t say anything, instead, he leaned his head down and wrapped his lips around your nipples tugging at them and softly nipping them with his teeth. Finally, Jungkook let you down so you stood and he kneeled down on his knees. He began to unbutton your jeans and then looked up at your through half hooded eyes. “I wanna eat you out since I really couldn’t last time.” You softly bit your lip and nodded. He pulled down your pants and you stepped out of them. “Finally wearing panties.” He teased and you blushed. 

“Sit on the bed facing me.” He ordered you did as he said and sat down facing him. “I want you to look at yourself in the mirror while I eat you, okay?” Your eyes flicked to the mirror as you saw your naked torso in the mirror and Jungkook approaching. You looked at Jungkook who now kneeled in front of you, he pushed your thighs apart and he hummed, he could see how wet you were. His hand softly rubbed your clit over your panties and you softly moaned your eyes shooting up to the mirror, a blush rising on your cheeks. He increased his speed lightly before pushing his hand into your panties, Jungkook’s middle finger teased your entrance and he hummed. 

“So wet for me baby, do you ever get this wet with Namjoon?” He mumbled and you shook your head softly moaning. He removed his hand and pulled your panties down around your ankle. He spread your pussy lips apart and he tucked his head in between you his tongue lapping on your clit, the heat in your stomach picked up and you leaned back your eyes shifting from the mirror back down to Jungkook. While he flicked his tongue he slipped in his middle finger and began to pump you his tongue continue to circle around, his eyes caught yours for a second and he smirked pulling away. “Eyes on the mirror or I stop.” You whined softly and looked at the mirror. 

You felt so exposed in this position, Jungkook’s back to you his muscles flexing as he dove deeper into your core, moans erupted from your lips your hand tangled in his hair. For a second your eyes looked at your flushed body, nipple poking up in the air, chest quickly rising and falling, small beads of sweat plopping onto your exposed forehead. “Kook-ah..” you moaned out and closed your eyes. You were approaching your high and your walls began to close around his finger, Jungkook quickly pulled his finger out and replaced it with his tongue getting a good taste of your juices, he pulled away and looked at you.

“I still want to fuck you.” He smirked softly his eyes finally meeting yours. You licked your lips softly and then smiled nodding. Jungkook rose to his feet and he unbuttoned his jeans pulling them off and kicking them to the side. Your eyes trailed down his abs and down to the bulge of his briefs, your mouth practically watered as you looked at his growing member. Your hand softly reached out and touched him causing a hiss to slip from his lips. He wasn’t expecting you to do that so the move threw him off guard and he stood there stunned. Your hand softly rubbed him over his briefs and then you hummed. 

“Take them off.” Jungkook nodded and he slipped his boxers off his member springing up and hitting his lower stomach, his hand automatically went down to his length where he pumped himself a few times. “I want to taste you.” You whispered and he smirked. 

“You’re filthy I swear.” His hand cupped your chin forcing you to look at him. “Next time baby, I wanna be in you right now.” You gave him a devilish smile ad he lightly pushed you back into the bed, you laid down for him and he climbed over you his lips meeting yours again, the kiss was soft and slow this time, he was really savoring you, his lips still tasted of you and your hands traveled back up to his hair, without disconnecting your lips, Jungkook slipped his hand down to his cock where he spread his precum around his tip, he placed his member between your lips and softly rubbed it up against your clit. 

You parted from his lips throwing your head back, the slick movements from his tip against your clit felt so nice and it made your pussy throb harder than before. “Fuck me Kook...” You moaned out one leg wrapping around his waist. He hummed and placed his tip against your entrance pushing in, he didn’t give you a chance to adjust, he just slipped in all the way. Your moans turned into cries and you groaned out at the pressure surrounding your entrance, a slight stinging. Jungkook didn’t move his hips instead he moved his lips down to your collarbone where he began to nip at you.

After a few moments, you softly pushed your hips up and his eyes met yours and he smirked softly. Jungkook hips began to move and he slid in and out in soft motions to not hurt you, the slick sounds were soft and not as bad as before until he began to quicken his pace. He increased his speed his hips now smacking against yours and his balls hitting you, the noise filled the room mixed with the moans from your lips and the sighs from his mouth. “Bet Namjoon never got to feel this good, god baby your pussy was made for me.” He moaned out, his hips continued their moves and his hand went down to your clit rubbing soft circles on it. 

“Listen to the sounds you make, god you’re so sexy.” He kept up the dirty words and the growling against your ear and it only made you arch your back towards him. “Im gonna flip you over, face down ass up princess.” He pulled himself out, you nodded and flipped over resting your head on the bed, Jungkook pulled your ass up to meet his glistening cock, and he slipped back in again. This time he was more aggressive, his hips moving quick and his balls hitting your clit now, your moans turning into screams, his fingers dug into your ass cheeks. 

“Jungkook-ah, yes!” You moaned out causing him to also moan, you could feel your high approaching and your walls were beginning to clench around him. “Oh fuck...” You moaned and he knew you were close but he didn't slow down, no he just picked up speed. His cock twitched inside of you and he knew he was close to. 

“Come with me baby..” He mumbled leaning down over you his pace never failing, soon enough your orgasm washed over you and you let out a yelp as your whole body twitched and you swore you could see stars. You were too dazed to notice the warm liquid filling you up as Jungkook reached his orgasm with you, he quickly pulled out and stared at the liquids falling from your pussy. 

“I came in you.” He mumbled and with his finger pushed in the cum that was falling, you heard him say this but instead of moving or saying anything you just laughed softly. “Im serious.” You nodded and laughed again. Jungkook couldn’t understand what was so funny, he laid down beside you and looked at you. 

“Im on birth control.” You spoke and shrugged. “Irregular periods.” You smiled. Jungkook nodded and then looked at you smirking. 

“So I can come in you all the time then?” He licked his lips. “Wanna go again?” He cleaned up with the sheets. You laughed softly and shook your head. 

“I need a break.” 

#bts #bts fic #bts smut #bangtan #bangtan boys #bangtan sonyeondan #bts jungkook #jungkook #jungkook fic #jungkook fanfic #bts jimin #jimin #jimin fic #bts rm #namjoon #namjoon fic

[nathannewlandbct-blog]

Making the Pit Area

On the 20th of September I began work on the pit section that would serve as the introduction to the gameplay within our game. I started by making the deferred decal textures that I would use to guide the player though the space. These were not difficult, and I quickly moved on to modelling the basic blocks I would be using to create the jumping puzzle. I knew I wanted to go for a simple geometric shape that was worn down and beaten about. This was inspired by the games Destiny and Destiny 2 where the Vex would have monolithic geometric structures constructed out of detailed, yet basic, primitive shapes. 

I took a primitive cube, subdivided it, sculpted some dings and scrapes into it and added a single face bevel to the edges. This keeps with the theme of simplistic geometric shapes within the game but the damage, combined with a detailed material, gives the prop a clean, yet sophisticated look. They were often many times the size of the player in terms of scale and so added to the monolithic sense of hte game area.

 All the cubes were aligned with the world space axis in units of 90 degrees. This helped on a practical level so that the cubes would line up flush to one another and it gave the whole scene a sense of order in relation to each other. There are two cubes, one 2x1 rectangle and four quarters of and 2x2x1 with a negative cylindrical hole. This piece means I can make curved ramps, arches, tubes or half, cylinder shapes.

  I started by making a basic jumping route, tested it a bit and tweaked some distances and scales, added some more, and got team members to test it. The whole process was shorter than I expected, I got most of the structure done in a day or two and polished it in another day or two. This also meant that not only myself, but the team was happy with the layout. Level layout should not technically be my job anyway as an environment artist and not a gameplay designer, but I was happy to help.

The tricky but was the lighting after. As the space is quite dark because of it being down a deep well, I wanted to play on the concept of having it so dark that the player can only see the essentials of the platforming experience, this would limit their need to explore and work well with the whole motif of the game where the player begins by falling into a pit of darkness and ends by being shot out of the top on into the blazing sunlight.

Again, I looked to the Destiny games to see how they did some of thier dark levels, and I remembered a specific boss fight (the Sunless Cell Strike) where the three players have to fight in a completely dark cavern where the only light comes from the boss itself and players when they activate abilities.

Our player character lights up when it uses abilities, but I knew that this would be ridiculous to require the player to move in order to see. I settled for framing key jumps with light (like how Wheatley does in portal 2)

and guiding players with glowing particle clusters.

 The biggest problem with this was the iris settings on the game camera. The desert by nature is  a bright place and my bottom of the well scene is about as close to absolute dark black as I can get. I could balance the exposure of the post processing volume to look current at low light but as soon as the camera looks at the pool of fluid ability pick up thing, the images would darken to compensate for the bright material. It was a water material which in the past ive found to have used emisive channels however, in this particular material, there was not emisive. It was not technically emitting any light, yet it was the brightest thing in the room. It still is as I havent found a fix for it yet. I tried replacing the empty node with 0 and that doesnt work. I tried having and internal space ppv and an external space ppv with exposure looked on both but i couldn't get those to balance out smoothly ether. The last thing I have left to try is to increase the ambient light level in the space with a couple of point lights and balance it out the exposure in the ppv. This would bring the values closer to what the exterior conditions would be as well.

It was about this time we had the GDM playtest. I was manning another game project I was also part of but was right beside this project was well low key listening to feedback that was being given regarding the work i had done. That afternoon I had added the most light that area had ever had since I started working on it to the point where it was almost too bright for the tension I had planned. This was after that morning some of my colleagues started to complain that it was too dark as I think they were expecting a light and breezy platforming adventure without realising this was the darkest, lowest point of the sentient tower and of the game itself. We also added a point light to the player character that was always on and cast some slightly creepy shadows on the player characters face. So I would stand beside the game while watching another and hear a few players mention how dark it is. Then I would have three colleagues come up to me and get my attention and and tell me its too dark. And this would happen again, and and again and again. I would go home and come back the next day to work on something else and I would have three or so more people tell me by the way the level is too dark, fix it. I would go home for the weekend and have my phone periodically light up with chat to do with the project and, did you know, we had lots of people say the level is  too dark. I get to Uni on a Monday to add more light to the level. Before I get my laptop out to even open the project I get told the levels too dark, you might want to fix the lights in the first area, learn to light a level.

I finally get to edit the lighting in the level and find that its simply the settings form the build we used to showcase hadn't carried over from what I had designed.

This kind of communication behavior is unacceptable and beyond irritating. It try to be patient with my team and receive criticism well but I cannot stand constantly being told information I already know, especially without being able to do anything about it. I know this kind of thing never happened when I was leading Project Kowhai.

At the moment I am working on fixing the lighting for the entire map as the directional lights and dynamic sky blueprint from the GDM demo build are glitching. Once thats fixed I can add and balance the first scene like I had intended to do.

D. (2018, July 20). Destiny 2: How to Get Whisper of the Worm - Exotic Sniper Rifle Guide. Retrieved October 8, 2018, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRewTTLRkYk&feature=youtu.be

I. (2015, September 15). Destiny: The Taken King - Sunless Cell Strike Mission. Retrieved October 8, 2018, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWLP0JXcrpo

I. (2011, May 21). Portal 2 Walkthrough: Chapter 5 The Escape. Retrieved October 8, 2018, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sm2bu9HezEE

#bct #aut #kowhai studio #kowhaistudio #ctec709

[wolferals]

🇪🇸vale🇪🇸

finally fallin' chapter 7

arón x reader

(The spanish is all google translate, i wont take responsibility for mistakes)

chapter 7

The sun tickling your face woke you the next morning. You stretched your legs and rolled over to your left side, your hand hitting the edge of the bed.

You didnt think any of it and just slowly opened your eyes.

The first thing you saw was the window where the sun had come from and you realized that this wasnt your place.

Carefully you sat up and scanned the lit room.

After thinking about the previous night you came to the life changing realization that you had had sex with Arón.

And as you has thought the night before, you immediately regretted it.

As you got up you saw that you were wearing underwear and your dress was kind of hanging off your upper body, your boobs fully exposed.

You picked up your bra and your other stuff and carefully opened the grey door to the living room.

At this point you hoped he wasnt there and you could sneak out but of course he was standing in the kitchen, sipping on a drink in a cup. Coffee.

„Oh good morning." he spotted you and smiled.

Totally embarrassed you walked up to him and sat on a chair, hiding your face in your hands.

„God my head." you groaned and didnt dare to look at him.

Arón stood in front of you and handed you a glass of water with a pill. „Here."

You nodded, swallowed the pill with a big chug of water and replied:"Thanks."

You didnt even know what to say, you were too confused and embarrassed for what you had done.

„I'm gonna go." you then spoke and got up and wanted to leave as fast as possible but a hand grabbed you by the arm and pulled you back.

„What?" you asked and turned around.

Without saying anything else, he cupped your face and placed a long sweet kiss on your lips.

It confused you even more. What did this mean now?

To you this was a mistake, a one time thing.

Was it more to him?

„Uhm.. bye." you exclaimed after looking at him in total confusion. He smiled and then opened the door for you.

„I had fun last night."

You just nodded again and made your way back home, still not knowing what had just happened.

It wasnt your intention to come off as a rude bitch, it just didnt make sense to you and you were pretty bad at hiding your self consciousness.

It had been a huge mistake.

*time skip to 5 hours later*

You had gotten a text from Arón this morning after you had left.

„Are you okay?"

To which you hadnt replied because you were still very embarrassed.

And to make this whole situation even worse, in about 45 minutes you were going to meet up with Itzan and Arón to take the shots for the photo series.

And oh boy were you nervous.

You were hoping Itzan had no clue but they were best friends, he had probably told him and Itzan was now thinking you were a hoe or something.

You had NEVER had a one night stand before. Especially not with a guy you basically just met.

Still very concerned about meeting him, you put on a pair of jeans shorts, a black top and a flannel in case it got colder later.

You didnt apply any makeup, you didnt feel like it. A blue scrunchie kind of highlighted your outfit, holding your hair up in a high ponytail.

You paired your outfit with a golden necklace, some dangly earrings and your usual vans.

Then the time had come for you to grab your bag, your phone, keys and your camera to get going. To meet him again. To face him.

It didnt take too long to get to the previously agreed venue and you were more than glad to see Itzan alone.

„Hey!" you greeted him and gave him a quick hug.

He smiled and replied:"Hi how are you?"

While you were waiting for Arón, Itzan seemed to have no clue about what happened and your thoughts were shooting through your head like arrows waiting for their time to hit the middle.

„Oh there he is, thank god." He suddenly spoke and you turned around just to be faced with a smiling Arón, who walked up to you and said:"Hola people."

It confused you how chill he was. Was hooking up with „strangers" an every day thing for him?

„You ready Piper?" Itzan asked him as Arón was sitting there on a bench, waiting for you to take the picture.

Itzan had called it your job to photograph and his own job was to „direct" Arón.

What a generous guy he was.

„Claro qué sí." Arón nodded and you tried to focus on your job to take a good photo.

While the guys talked about the next test shots you were only thinking of his naked body on yours, making you all bubbly inside.

„Y/n you good?" Itzan asked concerned and snapped his fingers in front of your face.

You came back to reality and asked:"Uh what? Yes. Im fine. Didnt sleep too well."

You heard Arón chuckle. „Why didnt you sleep y/n?"

He got a death glare from you.

„Easy guys. Lets just do this." Itzan seemed to get annoyed.

You were too. You were annoyed by Aróns behavior. But especially you were annoyed by yourself, you didnt even know how that could've happened.

„Y/n photo!" Itzan complained and you nodded back and took a the next picture of Arón. He was looking deep in your eyes, as you looked up from the camera again.

„Do we got it?" Itzan asked you.

Nodding you replied and checked through the taken photos.

They did look pretty good already, you still had to edit them though.

„Whats wrong with you, y/n? Are you feeling okay?"

Itzan looked at you all concerned. „You're absent today."

You simply nodded. „Sorry, im good."

He grabbed his backpack and then spoke:"Maybe its better if we edit the pictures this weekend, you get some sleep y/n you hear me? Imma head to the gym, see you later Piper."

And you were back alone with Arón. He walked up to you and intended on saying something but you cut him off before he could even start. „It was a mistake, I'm sorry. I dont wanna talk about it."

You acted like you were going through the pictures as he looked down at you.

„Y/n, come on." His arm reached out to touch your hand but you pulled away and replied:"I'm very sorry Arón, but i'm not like this i promise. I was drunk and it was a huge mistake."

He sighed. „Please?"

You looked up and took a deep breath.

„I know you like me."

You shook your head. But both of you knew it was a lie.

A thousand thoughts were running through your mind at this moment. „Arón, please lets forget this. I'm not ready for that."

Arón nodded and didnt say anything for a bit.

Then suddenly he asked:"Let me guess, you've been hurt before and arent ready to try something new?"

This time you shook your head and meant it.

„Not hurt. I just havent really been loved by anyone yet. And im..."

-„Scared?" he asked softly.

You were aware that this was a bitch move but you seriously were afraid of being close to someone.

Nodding you answered him.

„Yeah." you whispered and looked to the floor.

Arón got closer, tucked a loose strand of hair that had fallen out of your ponytail behind you ear and rested his hand on your cheek.

„Thats okay. We can take the time. And if you're not ready to do this, thats okay too. But trust me chica, I wont give up on you."

This made you laugh.

„Come on. Let me try this." He pleaded and pouted at you.

You werent sure, you wanted to get to know him better first before „dating" him.

„Please just give me some time." Was all you said before giving him a small smile and grabbing your stuff.

„As long as you need." he smiled back.

„But just that you wont lose interest, I'll keep annoying you over text."

You started to grin. You knew he would.

„Vale" you replied.

„Vale" he spoke back and smiled at you, as you slowly walked away after telling a boy who was head over heals for you to give you time? Like girl, this man wants you and you walk away?

Sometimes you hated yourself for your decisions.

#elite #aronpiper #cute #preference #omander #aronxreader #ander #preferences #smut #itzan escamilla

[actualbird]

It's totally cool if you don't!!! I get it!! However. Do you maybe have any tips on for when school is hell, I'm only asking because it seems to be hell for you a lot so maybe you have coping mechanisms (also wikihows Don't F-ing Work), but it's cool if you don't have advice! Just keep existing and being the messy and wonderful bird we all love.

hiya anon!!! and well this ask came at a great time since im starting the next semester next week, so maybe some of the stuff i do to stay alive might work for others too

schedule nap time: THIS IS NOT A JOKE IM SERIOUS. if you have a free period in between classes or even a class where you can afford to nap and nobody gives a shit, do it. and if you can, make it a regular thing. im the kind of person who needs that extra boost of energy during the day, so i put aside like 30 minutes per day to just pass out in the library. it’s rather rejuvenating. like, u might look a little bit like a mess after, but. worth it

planner/schedules/reminders: im not the type for planners because handwriting stuff is not my jam, but For The Love Of God have some sort of record for what you have to get done. this does wonders for my anxiety especially during hell week because i can see clearly whats going to kill me and plan accordingly. also, making checklists and schedules is…honestly very relaxing. for class schedules i use this app called ClassUp. it’s simple and cute and u can customize it a bunch. my checklist thing is also rlly great. it’s a chrome extension called Todoist. super straightforward with like cool stuff for deadlines and priorities AND you can hook it up to your email to send you reminders for when youre overdue on something. Todoist sends me so many emails…if you do like handwriting, maybe bullet journal? a lot of people find that fun. just try and find the type of organization that not only works for you but brings you some semblance of joy, no matter how small. god i hope im making sense.

Worry Time ™: this is something jenny @listentotheshityousay told me literally yesterday. if youre the type to get a lot of anxiety, “set aside 10~15 min every day (or maybe two short sessions per day if that works better) where u do nothing but worry.” i havent tried this yet but the logic is sound. like you exhaust your worrying in that session, and having a Time for worrying makes there also be a time for Not Worrying. it’ll help get rid of that constant feeling of dread and instead you have a concentrated but short and finite moment of dread. you cant get rid of worry, but you can sure make it more efficient. if you catch yourself worrying about something, make a note of it and worry about it in the next session. as jenny so wonderfully put it, “procrastinate on worrying.” it’ll free up a lot of time that can be used for actual work.

things thatll calm you down when youre freaking the fuck out: what it says on the tin. i dunno about you but school is panic attack heaven esp when workload gets Heavy. i figured pretty fast what the warning signs were and helped myself make that shit easier. i have a bunch of videos and songs saved in my phone that calm me down. this cute keychain i squeeze like a stressball.  origami paper (folding cranes is, ive discovered, a very effective way of calming down). just like tiny stuff you can bring with you just in case things get bad. they wont magically make things better, but at least it wont be like youre dying. 

rewards: positive reinforcement does fuckin wonders. in the hellscape of school sometimes it gets hard to feel happy about anything, so you have to take the hammer and find a way to make yourself feel happy. if you ace a test, Treat Yo Self. and this doesnt just apply to “big” achievements. i buy myself candy when i recite without stumbling over my words. tiny rewards or big rewards. i like to think it makes life feel like a game, which makes school just that tiniest bit more bearable.

just something to look forward to: i have this thing called fancy friday where on fridays i put a little bit more effort into my outfit so that i look Fly As Fuck. it makes me feel good the entire day and motivates me to get to the end of the week. i could be sobbing on wednesday but in the back of my head i’d think “at least on friday i’ll wear that cute skirt” and so i push on through. give yourself something fun to be excited about. school can be as much of a dick as it wants, but it cant take away the joy you have for something you crafted yourself. 

go easy on urself: not a coping thing but just a general reminder that while school is important, dont let yourself get too caught up in grades or work or achievement or failure. youre not a machine and youre doing your best. i think thats pretty cool

i hope school doesnt get too hellish anon!!!!

#anon #asks #long post #SURVIVE ANON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 1B - “I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first boot.”-Jess

no words.

LITERALLY

NO WORDS.

Two points. TWO FUCKING POINTS.

I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first foot. That ain't a cute look xoxox

i'm already forgetting to search for the idols, i'm already getting paranoid about if i need to start making alliances instead of just enjoying the really cute convos i'm having with ruthie lily and kevin (max is kinda dry and annoying but... we'll try to make it work ig).... and i'm already hating every challenge we do especially this one although i actually really liked the challenge it was so creative and fun, i just hated that i have bad luck and am stupid with the deduction things, HENCE why i havent looked for the idol yet. LOL. so.... tl;dr - things are going perfectly! this hufflepuffle is workin exactly as he should!

I just wanna say we really are the hufflepuffs. 114 moves in like 5 hours, but we did it.  Really proud of Ruthie, Landen, Kevin, Max, and I! Sending positive vibes to slytherin. Hope they are okay in this madness.

Yo my tribe? Kinda dope. I think that everyone worked really well together today! I think Joanna kinda took the lead and some of her ideas were... a choice. But! It got us first place! I think that this tribe has a good shot of getting to swap unscathed.

With Slytherin going to tribal, I really hope that someone I don’t know goes, but at the same time I’d be okay with Jess going? I feel like she’s such a sleeper threat in most games I’m in with her and I really just don’t want to compete with that this time around.

I kind of snapped and got myself an idol good until final 6 teehee.

I knew that the Snape's letter or writing or whatever that freak was up to was SOMETHING. Did I get lucky... hell fucking yeah.

A crackhead like me SHOULD NOT have all this POWER.

I also gave Jacob literally the worst clue ever because we are sharing clues ladies xoxoxo

The clue was:

"Snape is taken aback. “That wouldn’t be any business of yours now would it? I wouldn’t want to find out you are spreading false information. I trust you won’t have any issue with that”. Congrats! You’ve discovered Snape Storyline 2! That’s all for the moment, and will end your search for this round."

BOTH ARE HALF TRUE. Just in case he doesn't put 2 and 2 together and now I went from place to place on purpose. He's gonna think now I gave him something of value and I know he's gonna think "No way someone go an idol on day fucking 3".

CONFESSIONAL 1.1 — Walking into the Great Hall, I saw a few familiar faces... for not good reasons!

First Jacob, who I know from tengaged. He and I were in a similar friend group for a short period before he left it, but we had a rocky relationship. We flirted a bit (blame 16-year-old Nicholas), but that is in the past.

Secondly, Jess... who I just directly sent home in Eve’s The Challenge: Fresh Meat. She did not have great words to say to me (such as I’m condescending), so I was very wary and, honestly, unhappy with her being here.

But, as Kylie Minogue says, it’s better the devil you know.

Flash forward to the Sorting Ceremony, and I’m so happy to be.. Slytherin? I told Mister Vintage (Sammy) and Mister Heinen (Caeleb) that I’m either a Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, but I suppose I’ve been lying to myself.

Then, I see my tribe: both Jess and Jacob are present. This is a curse wrapped in a blessing wrapped in an enigma. And, I love it.

I hate, hate, hate conflict and bad vibes, so I directly spoke to both. Jacob did not easily recognize me, but remembered me fondly; so, a successful reacquaintance. Jess, on the other hand, was definitely more apprehensive (as was I), but I made one thing clear: the past is the past, and I am declaring my loyalty.

I have been hurt in previous games by shoving the past aside while the other is still grudgingly aiming for revenge, but I feel Jess is different. She apologized to me about her words, which did hurt, and I apologized to her. What I said was honest, so I’m glad to see a fateful blossoming.

The first reward challenge is revealed, and honestly, I’m really bad at participating in pre-merge competitions, because I do not mind tribal. However, I do want to, since we are such a small tribe, focus on maintaining our numbers in case of a swap. We came in second this reward, and honestly, I’m glad to have eaten cupcakes (although I hate cherry). The fact we all chose a dessert and were privately messaged makes me assume someone received an advantage, but who knows...

What I DO know is that I had two separate relationships, so I wanted to lock a trio down (Me, Jess, Jacob), but I obviously did not want to gamebot this early and make the chat day one. So, naturally, i waited until after immunity.

Speaking of immunity... I took charge, because I like it, but also, I wanted to be able to take blame if we lost. I hate the whole “let’s vote someone out cuz they cost us a virtual challenge” this early in the game, it’s a cheap way to vote. I want to vote on loyalty and activity instead. That’s why I am probably going to target Jessie or Vi, but I‘m unsure as to which will be my vote. On one hand, Vi is much less social, but she also contributed a lot to the challenge. I do not want to judge a book by it’s cover, so I will reach out to her and assess her vibe.

I like going to tribal first, because my philosophy is that it’s better to test loyalties now, rather than guess loyalties later.

Regarding other players, Jules and Juls just played in a mini with me and sheeped the majority alliance to screw me over, so I’m not feeling them right now. Bitterness doesn’t exist in my mind: play well and I respect it; sheep and be stupid, and I will gladly dish out the karma. 

I’m satisfied with the happenings of this game so far, and I hope to make it further!! This is one of my first real orgs so, I’m em definitely excited. x. nick

Yay we won immunity. Raffy do be carrying our tribe though!

WELL WELL WELL!!!!!!! as far as my relationships go which is where i left off last round, really nothing much has changed about how i feel about or view my tribemates, but in exciting news... we won immunity!! i am not going to be first boot that is so nice, and im hoping that we can keep winning immunity until a swap so I can feel more secure. I think I could stand a shot if we lost on this tribe but i think if so the vote would split 3-2 i dont think i can get a unanimous vote on anyone unless its myself which is NOT WHAT WERE TRYNA DO HERE !! if anything i feel like i have the best chance to wiggle myself in with the girls (lily and ruthie) Max would probably be my ideal first vote if we ever lose an immunity because I know landen can be useful in challenges, but he YET AGAIN addressed me with a name that does not sit well with me he called me a "challengewhore" yet another reference to TS 2020, so this is not a good sign. Ideally I could get landen out and still be set but i know he has a relationship with juls who i also have a relationship with and wish to continue to have in this game, and us going against each other could make that more stressful than it needs to be because i know landen avenged beck for voting juls out maybe juls would do the same for him? Much to think about, but thankfully i dont have to think about it all that hard because yet again we ARE SAFE !!! woo, anyways thats pretty much it hopefully we can keep winning :D

Ahhhh safety feels so nice, I’m glad that I’m not in danger of being the first boot. Also I love the fact that ravenclaw won the first challenge with so little moves HAHA!

I want to go far in this thing with lily and with kevin, my goal right now is to get to merge and owen be alive so I can work with him!

I am very happy to have won this immunity challenge. We barely won, but I managed to pull my tribe to a victory. Emphasis on the "I" part. I am very frustrated with my tribe's lack of challenge activeness and ability. If the time did not work for them, then I do not know why they even suggested doing it at 2 PM. This challenge would have gone faster if I had done everything myself. In the end, though, I hope this helps in me staying in the game because I am a necessity if they want to ever win a challenge in first place. I highly doubt that they could do it without me.

So I’m currently writing this with one hand because my cat decided to lie on my other one  anyways Nobody is really talking about the vote which means it’s probably me going but I’ll see what I can do to change that

Here's a breakdown of my first few experiences since I am writing this a few hours before the first tribal council.

FIRST I was cast in this game along with a BUNCH of people that are icons across different formats of Tumblr Survivor - so that's intimidating. Mostly because my play style is kinda vanilla in comparison. I gotta find a way to stand out or I'm going to be thrown out fast.

SECOND There's a twist that will probably have some major effect at some later point in the game where everyone is added to the Great Hall. I think that it's for convenience of posting things like results and challenges so it only has to be sent to one chat... but also so that we can feel THEMATIC which is a lot of fun.

The game started in the Great Hall and we got sorted into our houses and the implication was that it's random but.. I don't think it's entirely true if I can read into what the hosts said to me once I was sorted into Gryffindor (something about running out of room in Hufflepuff) - because I definitely didn't say Gryffindor in my application.

THIRD My tribe has the following people: Joshua, Juls, Raffy, Autumn, and myself. 

I do not know how many of theme said Gryffindor when they applied but also did not want to bring it up to them as I am masquerading as a brave idiot. :D

Anyway, I started conversations with all of them and they all seem very sweet!!

I've played in a game before with Raffy where he was super snakey but also a great ally until he tried to snake me. So there's that... he's also an "over the top" type of person so he takes charge a lot of the time and voices his opinions about everything. I hope we can create some sort of working relationship in the game, but I think that he will tell me the truth if he does align against me.

Autumn is super chill and super strategic-minded. She puts lots of thought into all of her decisions and makes calls that benefit her getting to the end while trying to align with the right people. If I can't get to the FTC of this game... TBH I want to make sure she gets there. I played with her in one game and we both were tossed out one after another when the game turned on our "side". I don't think that relationship will factor into this game as it was forever ago and we both kinda play "new" every time we start a game but I'm hoping she will want to try and play with me just because I've seen how great she is at the game.

Juls is a very fun person who seems to always be having a great time! I found out she lives in Texas too and that she was excited to get to know me because we are from the same state. I was like.. do I know you? Because when she messaged me the way she did implied that she knew who I was and I was thinking OH NO what have people said.

Joshua seems really sweet. He hasn't added incredibly much to conversations so far with him but he has contributed some fun things. I love that he tries to be entertaining, but as I see it so far he's the first person I'd be willing to vote out if it came to our tribe going to council... though of course, having said that I bet they've all declared me their first choice.

FOURTH The reward challenge was the Letter plus Number challenge so as predicted...

I did terribly and earned 0 points for our tribe and was SO happy it was not for immunity.

The immunity challenge was a Choose Your Own Adventure Puzzle.

We got a slow start in that I feel like everyone was afraid to make a move because that would put a target on whoever "failed for the team". Then me and Raffy kind of got things rolling with him taking the main leader role and me taking on a secondary role either agreeing with his suggestions or contributing a suggestion for what we should do.

There was a misunderstanding with the competition and we ended up making a whole bunch of extra moves because it was unclear to us that the letters we found at a later part of the challenge were able to be changed into numbers at a lockbox so we did a bunch of extra stuff... and I was resigned to the fact we were going to the first tribal when we go surprised that Slytherin... DID WORSE!!! O_O

Anyway... I still have no alliances or confirmed "working game" relationships and I really don't feel like starting those conversations at the moment so if I am out of the ones established or on the bottom of one that will add me to "pick me up" for later votes then I blame myself for not trying hard enough in that category.

FIFTH I definitely didn't just now search for the idol and waste two days that I could have searched other times. Nope! Not me!! :)

Anyway I went on a trip to Hagrid's Hut because I love me some Hagrid and I figured he'd let me in since I"m a Gryffindor and he loves us the best (you know, like a reverse Snape)... I dug through all of his junk and found his umbrella. Apparently I liked that it was pink and then left his hut. 

To be honest, I probably should have taken his dragon's egg and turned him in... maybe could have gotten him fired.

Someone finally got me to come out of retirement- can you believe it

It's been cute so far and I have no complaints, probably cause the hosts wisely put me, Owen, and Dan in separate corners lmao. Yooo if we all make it to merge?? Hell hath no fury. But we will cross that bridge when we get there! And for now I enjoy the calm before the storm. I deadass forgot how to be an org so I need all the time I can get to socialize and reacclimate. Me checking Skype more than once a year? Don't remember ever doing that. I love Raffy, it's always good to see Chips, I think I like Juls, and I'm not sure how I feel about Joshua but it's fine. I like Gryffindor cause we have no beef and I hope it stays that way.

ok so my tribe lost :( big sad. but im def ok bc jess is soooo close to me and we made a threesome with nick so. i think jessie is an easy first boot bc shes not around as much as vi. but really its our decision at the end of the day!

here’s the hot goss.. i’m a little upset i didn’t get anyone i Know on my house/tribe but also grateful HSBSNSNN all i know is that so far i’ve been doing pretty solid in securing relationships with those on my team (at least.. i hope so :flushed:) and i’m hoping they all like me hehe. kinda praying to just mist my way to merge where i can be united with people who like me enough to keep me around still.. >:D 

[agilenano]

Agilenano - News: The Best Audio Equipment of 2019

CGMagazine The Best Audio Equipment of 2019

With the advent of new technologies such as smart assistants, Wi-Fi speakers and more advanced Bluetooth headsets, the audio landscape has gotten much more interesting in recent years.

It seems everyone is looking to jump into the space, offering an exciting and diverse series of products all looking to snag your holiday dollars. From Sonos, to Amazon, there are countless devices that look to play your music while at home, or even on the go. With so many options, its challenging to decide which devices are the right ones to suit your needs.

This is where CGM comes into the picture. We have taken the time to sort through all the products currently on the market and find the best and most powerful ones to suit your audio listening needs. As always, CGMagazine only endorses products we have tested, so there always can be a piece of gear that while amazing, has not made it into our office for review.

Sonos Move

The Sonos Move carries forward years of technology and refinement and packages it into a relatively convenient, easy to understand device. The addition of a 10-hour battery, Bluetooth, and easy charging makes the Move one of the most exciting and most versatile devices Sonos has released in a long while.

Sonos has spent years developing the Move, and from the sound quality to the design, this effort and attention to detail is seen throughout the device. It sounds good and can take the punishment needed to be a speaker on the go. From drops of rain to general wear and tear, the Sonos Move is built to last.

Sonos set out to make the ideal Wi-Fi portable speaker, and they succeeded with the Move. This is a testament to the quality and time Sonos spends on their products, building devices that both last and sound great. While not for everyone, if you are already a part of the Sonos ecosystem and are in the market for a new speaker, look no further than the Sonos Move.

You can purchase the Sonos Move for $499.99 at Bestbuy or directly from Sonos.

Echo Studio

With the Echo Studio, Amazon is finally admitting good enough no longer cuts it within smart speakers. Amazon was one of the first on the smart speaker scene with the original Amazon Echo. Now, years and countless Echo based products later, Amazon is finally offering an option that competes against the likes of Sonos or the higher end range of Google and Apple smart speaker entries. While it is a more costly option, the Echo Studio offers tremendous value for the price, ushering in a truly fantastic sounding speaker, that also happens to be equipped with Alexa.

Sitting at the top of the Echo Studio is a 55mm mid-range speaker, that utilizes the cut-out to maximize bass output while playing heavier songs. There are three 55mm mid-range speakers in the Echo Studio, one faces up, while the other two act as left and right. To push the audio forward, Amazon has a single 25mm tweeter. If that were not enough, the Echo Studio also features a 133mm downward-facing woofer to ensure all the songs have the impact the original creators intended.

Amazon has done a fantastic job building a high end for its echo line, and the Studio stands as one of the best speakers you can get for sub $300 CAD. While I hope Amazon improves on the inputs if they iterate on the Studio next year, as it stands now, the Echo Studio is a great value and an all-around fantastic sounding speaker.

You can buy the Echo Studio from Amazon for $259.99.

Lucid Sound LS41 Headset

Times have changed since then as headsets have entered the luxury sphere, with pricier entry points and more features cropping up on the regular. Enter Lucid Sound, an emerging headset maker whose goal is to fit right into this luxury sphere. While they havent been around for very long, their new LS41 flagship headset is a triumph that very much puts them on the map with crisp sound quality, comfortable design, and intuitive features.

The LS41s sport 7.1 DTS Headphone:X Surround Sound that manages to bring an impressive layer of immersion to gaming. While playing, I regularly noticed sound cues that I dont normally hear on my standard headset. As a result, I felt even more immersed in the world of the game, and it made for a truly cinematic sound experience.

The LS41s are rather pricey, clocking in at $200.00 USD, and are no doubt out of many gamers peripheral budgets. That being said, if you do have the money and are interested in a great wireless headset that packs impressive sound quality and comfort then the LS41s are a great choice.

You can buy the Lucid Sound LS41 from Amazon for $259.99.

Sonos Ikea Symfonisk

When you think of high-end wifi audio, you dont tend to think of Ikea, yet in a recent partnership with Sonos, they are looking to change that. The Symfonisk is a result of that partnership, a simple, yet exciting bookshelf speaker that sounds good, and brings with it all the power of Sonos, only a bit cheaper, and with that special Ikea style.

At first glance, it may be hard to imagine this speaker holds the power of Sonos behind it. It looks very Ikea, with simple lines, and all fabric covering. But once you plug it in, and set it up, things change. The IKEA Symfonisk sounds fantastic far better than the $149.00 CAD pricetag would suggest it should. It would be hard to compare it to the Sonos One, although for most people it has a similar sound profile. It is powerful and elegant in design, making it an ideal addition, especially if you want to avoid the tech, smart home house look.

Sound-wise, the IKEA Symfonisk has a bold, full-bodied sound that will more than fill most rooms. And while the balance may be a bit heavy on the treble, overall, the IKEA Symfonisk sounds good and strikes a good balance for most audio setups, especially with some basic tweaking to the EQ.

For the price, the IKEA Symfonisk makes a fantastic addition to the Sonos family of products. It looks good, sounds fantastic, and will fit into most living spaces with ease. While it may not have the sound profile of some of the higher-end Sonos range, it more than makes up for that in price and style. It is a great speaker and a great gift for anyone looking to jump into wifi audio this holiday.

You can purchase the IKEA Symfonisk at Ikea starting at $149.00 CAD.

Astro A50 Headset + Base Station

For those unfamiliar, the Astro A50 are a pair of premium $399.99 CAD headphones that are equipped with a flip-down microphone and a base charging station. There are two models: PlayStation 4/PC and Xbox One/PC, with a switch on the headphones themselves that determines which of the available two the headset will interface with. Built by ASTRO Gaming, these are meant to be top-quality gaming headphones.

The charging station serves as the A50s anchor and link to your device of choice. It can smoothly hook up to a PC with a USB cable, and can be attached to either a PlayStation 4 or Xbox One (we are reviewing the PS4 model) with a slightly more involved, but well explained and quick setup process using an optical cable. The base must be plugged into a device, otherwise the headphones will not work. You have to commit to a location.

The Astro A50 headphones are a perfect fit for gaming. These headphones have good sound, a convenient wireless design, and a comfortable fit you can wear for long gaming sessions without any fatigue. They have a clear and reliable microphone, a good battery life with power saving features (annoying as they are), and an excellent sound for both gaming and listening to music. For gaming, and for stationary activities like watching shows or movies, these headphones are worth their asking price.

You can by the Astro A50 at Bestbuy or Amazon for $299.99 CAD.

Creative Outlier Air

Ever since the 3.5mm headphone jack became a rare commodity, the race to build the best possible Bluetooth headset has been on. Everyone from Razer, Samsung to Apple have thrown their hat into the ring, offering a wide range of options, all with advantages and disadvantages. Now Creative Labs, the company behind some of the best sound cards of the 90s is stepping in, with their new Outlier Air. This small sport wireless headset promises sweat-resistance, in-ear controls, and hours worth of battery while on the go, all for $69.99 USD. While not the best available, for the price, the Outlier Air is hard to resist.

Built for consumers looking to be free of wires, the Outlier Air offers an easy design and concept. They manage a fantastic battery, in headphones and with the case, meaning you will have little to worry about while on the go or working out. The IPX5 certification means sweat, minor water spillage, or even the sporadic downpour should be no issue, at least were the headphones are concerned.

While the Outlier Air may not be the best headphones on the market, they offer an amazing value for money proposition. The Outlier Air are comfortable, affordable and is packed with features that should satisfy even the most discerning buyers. While they dont have the polish or isolation seen in other brands, for the cost, the Outlier Air is a must-buy for anyone looking to go wireless.

You can buy the Creative Outlier Air on Creative for 74.99 USD.

Jaybird Tarah Pro Bluetooth Headphones

The Jaybird Tarah Pro are headphones built for the runners, athletes and fitness nuts out there. They are solidly built, corded headphones that feel good and sound great. While not true wireless headphones, for the people these headphones are built for, that is a bonus there is little chance of dropping and losing a headphone while on the go.

The Jaybird Tarah Pro are a good balance between utility and craftsmanship. They feel comfortable when worn and look good up close. There was clearly a lot of time and effort to build a Bluetooth headset that can withstand an active lifestyle and still look stylish while doing so. They fit comfortably even when using them over long periods or while working out or being active.

The Jaybird Tarah Pro charge quickly, are easy to get setup, and most importantly, sound great. Often sport headphones put so much attention into making them rugged or able to withstand water that audio is an afterthought. Thankfully, thats not the case here. Audio feels natural, allowing the music or spoken audio to shine even though Bluetooth audio compression. From electronic, vocal, to instrumental, everything sounded good, with no aspect of the audio greatly overpowering a piece of music.

The Jaybird Tarah Pro are not the highest end bluetooth headphones you can buy, but they are some of the most well rounded, most well equipped sports headphones we have ever tested. They sound good, are comfortable to use, and are just plain nice to look at. If you are looking to a gift for the indoor or outdoor athlete in your life, look no further than The Jaybird Tarah Pro. They will make any fitness enthusiasts very happy.

You can buy the Jaybird Tarah Pro for $199.99 at Bestbuy or Amazon

Amazon Echo Dot with Clock

In a modern world where we are constantly surrounded by smart speakers and devices, the concept to use that power to ask the time seems silly. According to Amazon, one of the most asked questions of Alexa is the time, so it makes sense that at least one of their devices would come with a clock built-in. Enter the Amazon Echo Dot with Clock, a simple addition to an already great device that somehow makes it infinitely more useful to people.

This new $59.99 USD smart speaker, places an LED digital clock in front of the already fantastic design of the Echo Dot. It seems like a no brainer for the little device, and it works wonderfully. With this new addition of a digital display, the Amazon Echo Dot with Clock also has a few other tricks under its sleeve to use this new readout.

Ultimately, Amazon has added a great new feature to an already great device. Do I feel it is a game-changer for the echo range of products? No, but what it does do is give a quality of life improvement that was much needed. If you are looking to pick up a gift, or want to enter the world of smart speakers, the Amazon Echo Dot with Clock is a great starting point. It is simple, inexpensive, and a great addition to the range and a must-buy for anyone looking for an inexpensive smart speaker.

You can buy the Amazon Echo Dot with Clock from Amazon for $59.99.

The post The Best Audio Equipment of 2019 appeared first on CGMagazine.

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