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onedaughterofman · 1 year

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Heyoo! how are ya doing? Im unsure if you take requests because i can't navigate tumblr to save my life, but, if you do, could i ask for some Ghost bc x reader birthday comfort fic? like,,, hurt to comfort? yesterday was my birthday and i had a rlly bad day, like, boss screaming at me, ppl forgetting abt it, etc. Can be with anyone, the ghouls, papas, whichever flows better :) Gn reader if possible. If not thats ok! Hope you had a good day!

Hi! Listen, I'm not taking requests anymore BUT I had a draft laying around that could work with this, so I made some changes here and there. It's not perfect, but I hope you like it.

I know your birthday was some days ago, so happy (really) late birthday! ♥ I'm sorry to hear you had a hard time. Here is my gift to you.

Papa Emeritus II x g/n reader. Birthday fluff!

Summary: Secondo is a soft man at heart, with a secret talent he puts to good use for your birthday.

Tags: Rated T, kinda fatherly Secondo, fluff, platonic relationships.

A/N: Look at Papa doing his silly little dance!

“What’s that?”

Papa’s hand hangs in front of your eyes, a big white ceramic plate resting on it. “Torta paradiso,” he replies, delicately swaying the place to one side and then the other. “All'arancia”.

Alright. That you can see and smell. The delicate yet strong fragrance of the orange permeates the air, making your mouth salivate. The cake looks simple, barely decorated with a bit of powdered sugar and orange zest on the top.

However, you don’t understand why Secondo is placing it right in front of your face, making it serpent like it’s tempting you to sin. “I can see that,” you continue, sitting straight on the couch. The heavy blankets fall around your waist and the cold air hits your skin, sending shivers down your arms and legs. “Where did you get it?”

“I made it myself.”

Oh.

That’s… something you didn’t see coming. A man like Secondo, who always looks angry and intimidating, doesn’t seem to be the type to spend any time in the kitchen baking something as delicate as a cake. Even more, he not only made it, but now he’s proudly displaying it to you.

“I didn’t know you could bake.”

“Can’t an old man have a hobby?”

Tripping over your words, you hurry to reassure him that it wasn’t your intention to question him. Secondo only laughs, a bitter but somehow calm sound that fills the air with warmth. He takes a sit next to you, motioning to move away the blankets. The ceramic plate is placed on the little coffee table.

For a few seconds, Secondo stares at the TV. There’s an old movie there, a cartoon you used to watch when you were years and years younger. This movie always brought comfort to you, awakening memories of hot beverages and butter cookies, of old friends and cozy socks.

Life used to be simpler before. Then, shit happened. Shit always happens, but it hits harder on days like these.

On your birthday.

No one remembered it. This day was just another day, only heavier on the heart. Maybe it’s all your fault. You are fool, as you have constantly been. Year after year, you hope for things to be different, better somehow.

A certain type of sadness fills your body and soul on your birthday. A sadness that walks behind, hugging your back and whispering heavy words in your ears.

No one cared.

No one celebrated it.

No one.

To your left, Secondo sighs. The sound halts the tears that were beginning to form on your eyes. In a swift movement, you hurry to clean any remnant of it, hoping he doesn’t notice it.

If he does, Papa says nothing. He merely reaches out to the plate, cutting a slice of cake before carefully placing it on a napkin. His gloved hand extends in your direction, leaving no place to deny him. You take it.

His gaze is intense and expectant, full of an emotion you can’t quite discern when you take the first bite. Is he nervous? Is he anxious? He’s looking right into your soul, analyzing every little twitch of your eyebrows and searching for any reaction.

The sweet and fresh taste of the cake fills your mouth. The texture is soft, airy and delicate, and the taste of orange and vanilla is comforting. You nod, a smile on your lips. “This is so good!”

“I’m happy to hear that,” he says, letting himself fall on the couch. For another long moment, he stays in silence. His eyes absentmindedly look into the TV, before closing as he exhales. “Happy birthday, kid.”

“You remembered it?”

“Isn’t it a Papa’s duty to remember this stuff?”

Right. A duty. It’s foolish to think a busy man like Papa Emeritus II went out of his way to do something for your birthday, out of the kindness of his heart.

Maybe it’s the way your gaze obscures, or the heavy lump on your weary shoulders, but he hurries to continue. “I mean, I care about every Sibling. I know most of us don’t fit outside this Ministry, but we are a family here. If we have nothing else, at least we have each other.”

The strange softness in his eyes makes you swallow dry. Papa is a stern man, someone who mostly keeps to himself when he’s not surrounded by women. And yet, there’s something deep inside his pupils, a dark veil of emotions that tells you he understands.

Papa is a sad, sensitive and lonely man at heart. “Do you really like it?” he questions, after a beat. “I wasn’t sure if I wanted to make this or a torta caprese.”

“I liked it,” you repeat. Papa smiles, reaching out to wipe a bit of powered sugar from the corner of your mouth.

“So, what are we watching?”

Excitement filling your voice, you explain. Papa listens, nodding a few times in an effort to encourage you to keep talking. When the movie continues, his eyes remain on the screen for a few minutes before you detect the faint sound of his snores.

Oh, well. Papa is also an exhausted, old man. Leaning closer to his body, you wrap the corner of the blanket around him. Head on his shoulder, you take a deep breath and close your eyes too.

#ghost band #ghost band fanfic #papa emeritus ii #papa secondo #papa emeritus ii x reader #my writing #my fics #ask box

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cielomist · 1 year

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This is very much not april fools related i genuinely want to hear your thoughts /srs but i am begging you can i Pls have a full ass rant abt all your vexen thoughts im backreading through propaganda and youre making me go OUGH - @fuckable-kh-men-battle

HOUGH

i want to preface this by saying i am not super articulate, i am very much a person that just rotates characters in my head at high speeds and doesn't form super coherent thoughts, but by god i know i have a lot of vexen thoughts its just gonna take some time to put them into like, understandable words

under a cut bc im sure its gonna get long. also im sorry that this is so incredibly disorganized.

OK SO

i have loved vexen. ever since i was a kid. i never even played com i just saw him in the kh2 journal and was like "THAT ONE"

(i was also deep in the like… 2009-era deviantart kh fandom, but… 😬)

but getting into the deeper stuff, vexen has this fun little dichotomy of somehow being incredibly cringefail but also EXTREMELY accomplished. he brags about how smart he is, he giggles to himself about it in the castle in days, and it comes across as this pathetic little man just being full of himself, but he also can like, legitimately back it up? he just MADE another riku. he MADE xion, and xion is absolutely extraordinary because she was not supposed to develop as her own person, but he was just so damn good at making just real ass PEOPLE that xion became her own person with her own thoughts and feelings and dreams

one of my favourite scenes is this one. first of all i live for all interactions between vexen/even and zexion/ienzo because GOD. i'm fucking obsessed with dad!even as a concept and i love thinking of the dynamics between ienzo and all his dads and i need to stop myself here or i'm gonna go off on a whole other tangent about ienzo specifically and how fucked his entire life was--

anyway that scene is one of my favs because i just love vexen running through the castle, yelling for his son, because his boss is actively avoiding him. i just assume this is how it always is with him.

also it's been pointed out that vexen, when talking with zexion, will often bend so he's eye level with him and i love that. i adore that.

also speaking of vexen/even and zexion/ienzo, THIS

god sorry i just read ienzo's character file and he mentioned even would scold atw for buying ienzo so much ice cream and i love that mental image. atw is literally king of radiant garden and even's bitching him out for spoiling his 8-year-old

and god VEXEN'S CHARACTER FILE... "I had lost sight of why I wanted to be clever in the first place. I wanted to be clever because I wanted to be helpful to someone." HHHHHHHH even became a scientist in the first place because he waanted to HELP PEOPLE and he got in this spiral of "i need to be smart to help people" and he worked HARD to become smarter and eventually dropped the "to help people" presumably because of xehanort and then when he was recompleted the first time he REMEMBERED WHY he wanted to do all the things he wanted to do in the first place, and in order to help people he gave up his heart, his humanity, what the original organization had been WORKING TOWARDS THE WHOLE TIME and i just. ough.

also in birth by sleep even talks to ven for like, two minutes maximum and from that is able to just deduce that ven's heart is not only completely devoid of darkness, but also that any darkness he DID have was forcibly removed. i don't know where to fit this tidbit in but i think about it a lot.

i mentioned in one of my propaganda asks a post that theorized about vexen's shield, and while i still can't find that post i did remember a fic i read based of of it

i somehow don't have coherent thoughts on his redemption arc in kh3. i get distracted by how pretty he looks when he says he wants to atone i think. but his little monologue when he's trying to convince demyx to help him out... ough. i am personally of the opinion that even was the apprentice with an actual like, medical phd. i think all of the apprentices specialized in different things, and i don't really have a solidified idea for anyone else (though dilan is shown to like flowers in his character file, though i think that gardening is a hobby for him rather than his professional field) but that's my Even's Professional Career headcanon. he absolutely has the entire ICD manual memorized. and rememorizes it every time it updates.

i also think post-kh3 when he was re-humaned he just straight up euthanized himself to be recompleted. he didn't want to wait to regrow a heart and it beat the hell out of immolation, axel

anyway i really wish people wouldn't reduce vexen/even to just being a creepy weirdo; he has SO MUCH to him, but ultimately i think people overlook him because he's not an anime prettyboy and i and the other vexenfuckers are stronger and smarter and sexier than everyone else

for now that's all i've got. if i think of more things i will rb with more vexen thoughts. thank u for your patience as i go insane writing this. <3

(fun fact! when i was in middle school (maybe high school?) i set his japanese laugh as my alarm and to this day i remember it bleeding into one of my dreams via a man in a parking lot laughing at me until i woke up and realized it was my alarm going off for school)

#keetext #vexensweep

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yesimwriting · 3 years

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Would you write a Kaz Brekker request where the reader is a bookworm and a crow and basically Kaz asks the reader to read to him as his way of apologizing after a argument that was his fault?

it a/n i did something kinda similar in a 'promise of rain' blurb,, but this concept is so cute to me:)) love it sm i moved it up my request cue lol

also IM IN COLLEGE NOW!! WHAT?? AND IVE BEEN TO A PARTY! AND IM JOINING A SORORITY AND I DID DRAMA AUDITIONS AND AHH !! SO DIFFERENT! I MISS MY MOM AND SISTER AND DOG AND EVEN MY DAD BUT IM HAPPY HERE!!

also im a little worried this might not portray kaz superrrrr accurately bc it's been awhile so just let me know,, feedback leads to improvement:)) also kinda set this up for a part 2 bc...well youll see

They've always said a lot of things about him, and I've always heard them. But I've never quite believed them. Sure, I get why the dark things that have flourished in the poisoned soil that is Ketterdam consider Kaz Brekker the darkest thing of all. I understand the nickname 'Dirtyhands' for the gloved criminal who has fooled each crime boss at least once. I understand each terrible thing they've said about him.

But I've never agreed with them. I've never even considered agreeing with them. Until today.

The thought that maybe everything people say about him is correct in a simple context struck me worse than the silence after our argument. It made me feel like both a fool and hypocrite. Kaz and I have had our fair share of spats over the relatively short time we've known each other, but never like this. Never so badly he stormed out of the room before I could. I squeeze the book in my lap even harder, desperate to focus on the words on the pages.

You didn't hurt him. He walked away because he decided you weren't worth the cost of his expensive time. I repeat those thoughts in my mind over and over again, letting them bitter me further. It's a lot easier to be mad than hurt. A lot easier to fuel your pain than try to understand your mistakes. Besides, tiredness is already dredging around in my chest and if I don't calm down a little I won't be able to fall asleep.

I had escalated the fight more than I should have. Knowing Kaz is like performing in a tightrope act. One must always be aware of where they're going. Watching what's in front of them without ever thinking too much about what's beneath or behind them. Today though, when I needed my balance most I chose to fall. I chose to dive, and apparently there was no net.

"Oh, you're doing that thing."

I roll my eyes at Jesper's voice as I fight down a yawn. I wipe my face with the back of my palm before turning. The burning behind my eyes never resulted in full tears, but I feel better after doing so. "What thing?"

"That terribly noble thing where you find it in yourself to take full blame for every single conflict you and boss man fall into." The slight humor in his voice is enough for me to roll my eyes again. "Between you and me, I'm sure the reason he's so angry now is because you didn't do that for once."

I press my lips together as my chin angles itself upwards slightly. "I never do that." He raises an eyebrow. The slight sympathy that colors the look is more offensive than his accusation. "If I pick and choose my battles, it's for good reason."

"Clearly."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He shrugs once before further entering my room. I say nothing when he sits at the foot of my bed. "Oh, you know," Jesper stretches back casually, resting his back against the wall and extending his legs, "You and Kaz--Kaz and you."

Has he been drinking? Perhaps he's not here because of my unusual absence from downstairs after my fight with Kaz but because he's already too tipsy to think right. "What?"

At my confused look he grins, flashing all of his teeth with an arrogance that outshines the whiteness of them. He taps the still open book in my lap. "Let me put it in terms you'll understand." Jesper sits up a little further, amusement clear in his features. "You two make a shameful Elizabeth and Darcy--"

"Oh, shut up," I groan, glaring at him, "This isn't Pride and Prejudice. And Kaz and I," Jesper's smugness returns when I can't quite think of what I want to say, "We're barely friends--we're barely anything, let alone what you're implying."

Jesper pulls his legs up and shoves me gently. "Dearest, y/n," he ignores my glare, "You should know better than anyone that 'barely friends, barely anything' with Kaz is more than it is with anyone else?"

"That doesn't mea--"

"You two say goodnight to each other." Once. Kaz and I said good night to each other in front of Jesper once. How dare he assume it happens regularly? He's right, but that doesn't mean I'm okay with it. "You play cards with him. Not for money, not for skill--"

"It's for practice." The look Jesper gives me is enough to tell me that my defense didn't land.

Damn him for ever finding Kaz and I on one of those strange nights. One of those nights in which he lurks at the stairwell...the one that divides my room and his attic. One of those nights in which it feels like he's a phantom and I'm the only one that can really see him. A night in which we both silently find each other.

I couldn't quite believe it the first time it happened. I'm not exactly a Crow--I don't feel enough a connection to the Dregs to join them without some kind of guarantee--but I was needed for some obscure job. but I was needed for some obscure job. The Crows needed an insider who could blend into high society, and I needed a place to stay away from my father.

It worked. I worked. And with each passing day I found myself enjoying the Crows more and more. That's why I stayed. That's why I started checking the stairwell practically every night, a set of playing cards in my hand.

The first time had been awkward. I couldn't sleep and my room felt too quiet, but the rambunctious club felt too loud and a little unsafe considering the hour. So I settled for the only space in between. When Kaz found me sitting on the steps and playing a solitary card game I had been so stunned by embarrassment I just offered to deal him in. I had been more shocked when he silently accepted my offer.

"Practice?" Jesper repeats. "You were laughing, I heard you."

"That was one time--how do you know we didn't just happen to play cards together the one time you saw it?"

"Because you laughed about a play you considered 'predictable'."

Sighing, I sit up a little straighter. "I'm not having this conversation. Occasionally saying 'goodnight' to someone who lives in the same space I live in and sometimes playing cards with said person because we both happen to be up at a certain time doesn't mean anything."

"And the way he looked at the contact that was flirting with you?"

Oh...this conversation again. "For the last time, the contact wasn't flirting with me. We had to dance to blend in and when he leaned towards me to whisper in my ear...it was to tell me the intel Kaz just had to have."

"And when he tucked that strand of hair behind your ear?"

"He just wanted to sell our cove--"

"Y/n, he kissed your cheek and I'm fairly certain he would have kissed you if Kaz and I hadn't made it to the corridor at that second."

Why is everyone so obsessed with what would have never happened? The contact had been attractive, tall with fair eyes and hair. But it's not like I feel anything for him, nor would I have been so foolish during a job. A fact that Kaz refuses to believe. I'm tired of this argument...I'm just tired. This job required me to start getting ready early in the morning and lasted long into the night.

"I wouldn't have kissed him and even if I had, the fact that Kaz is so mad about feels...sexist." A stupid argument, considering that Kaz couldn't care less if the person he's working with is female, male, or anything in between because the only thing he cares about is profit. "It's a stupid thing to be mad about, but you hit on anything with a pulse at any time and--"

"I resent that--"

"For the first two weeks I was here I thought you might've been a prostitute."

I can feel him holding in a laugh. "Did you at least think I was a good prostitute?" When I glare again, he finally actually laughs. "Not the point--got it."

"Then what is the point? You're bored and obsessed with gossip so now you're shaking me for information you don't need."

"The point is you're oblivious." Rude...I move my leg in a weak attempt to push him off my bed. Jesper catches my ankle easily, ignoring my attempt at a fight. "You thought the contact was only doing his job and you don't know the real reason that Kaz blew up at you for the first time the way he blows up at everyone."

"Okay, well since you know everything, tell me why he's mad."

He lets out a sigh like he can't believe I even needed to ask that. "It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy."

...Maybe he is drunk? "Don't be so cryptic. I don't like you enough to put up with that."

Jesper half-sighs again before pushing himself off my bed. "I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that."

"Asshole," I mumble instinctually as he walks towards my door. "Are you not telling me because I tried to push you off the bed?"

He turns when he reaches my door in order to lean against my door frame. "It's not not because of that." I should throw my book at his head. "In all seriousness, think about it. If you don't you'll either kill each other or kill me."

Ugh...he's so confusing. This time, I let him go. He leaves he door open, which is beyond annoying. I stand up to close it, promising myself I will focus on my book the second it's in my hands again. As I walk back towards my bed, my eyes land on the deck of cards on my nightstand.

Does it send a signal I don't want to send if I don't go the stairwell tonight? Do I want to send a signal? I don't know...actually, the only thing I know is that I don't want to think about this a second longer. I don't ease as I read, but my eyelids become heavier with each word they cross. I feel the weight of them as my focus slips, farther and farther away until I can no longer focus. When my eyes fall shut I can't bring myself to think or force them open.

I notice my surprised before I register that I've just woken up. Falling asleep feels so far and yet the crick in my neck confirms the obvious. Rubbing the eyes with the back of my hand, I push my book from my lap and sit up. The only indication of how much time has passed is how much my bedside candle has melted.

How long have I been asleep? How did I manage to fall asleep? I thought I was too mad at Kaz to manage anything but pouting in my room. I hadn't even decided if I wanted to talk to him.

I stand even though I haven't decided anything. I should at least change if I want to go to bed. But is leaving this alone for even longer a bad idea? I think Jesper thought so...though my conversation with him is far from clear. It's not the best look that the first time you let him pick a fight with you happens to be about some guy. I'm going to pretend I think you're smart enough to piece things together from that. What does he want me to do with that?

Maybe he was partially intoxicated and felt the need to play the role of a good friend. Or maybe this is his idea of a joke.

Whatever--regardless of Jesper, I have a choice to make. A tiny part of me hopes it's insignificant, but I know Kaz enough to know that nothing is insignificant to him. He holds onto things the way he holds onto his kruge. Perhaps I'll seek out Inej, she seems to be the best at rationalizing. Though she might be asleep by now, or on a job or...I don't even know.

How late is it? Is it late enough to be one of the few hours Kaz claims to reserve for sleep? Maybe my bad luck is still around and he's already in bed for once. Does that mean his anger will extend to tomorrow?

I shouldn't care. It's not like I'm in the wrong. Did I escalate things? Maybe a little...but I won't apologize for defending myself. Even though that makes everything a little easier. I feel stuck, like in some kind of place of half sleep. A single knock at my door is enough to make me want to jump. I rub my eyes a little more firmly in hopes of waking up more before someone sees me.

I approach the door without worry. Maybe it's not as late as I assumed. Or maybe it's really early? I open the door while still fighting against my slight disorientation. I'm so focused on acting normal, I almost don’t register the person standing at my door.

I don’t know who I expected, or what--maybe Jesper, much more tipsy than he was before, slumped against the doorframe, only knocking because he’s too tired to push the door open. Maybe even Inej, on her way here to deliver some kind of job or notice of dismissal. But it’s nothing I could expect. It’s...Kaz.

The Dirtyhands stands at my door, expression as hard as ever yet something behind his eyes that burns the sleep away from me. “Uh--hi.” I bite my tongue to avoid cringing at that very awkward beginning. “Are you here to kick me out yourself?” The only response I get is the slightest shift of his gaze off of my face. “No? Well then I think I’m going to bed. It’s late.”

My tone and words are clear. Get out of my doorway, I’m in no mood to go back to arguing. When he still doesn’t say anything, I’m emboldened by my nerves. I push the door between us without breaking eye contact.

Before the wood can meet the doorframe, he moves his cane, wedging it between us. “Y/n.” I don’t understand the way he says my name, but I’m certain he’s never said it like that. “I...” When he’s not prompted by the uncomfortableness of silence, I raise an eyebrow, my grip on the door tightening. “What I said shouldn’t have been said.” Wait--is he admitting fault? I’m so thrown I almost melt entirely. “Not to you.”

The addition leaves him so lowly a part of me wonders if I’ve imagined it. I’m so thrown by it I don’t even think to reply until a long second has passed. “You seemed to believe the opposite a few hours ago.”

His lips press together for a moment. “You didn’t ask me to play cards tonight.” He took that as intentional? At least that got me some kind of apology? I keep my mouth shut, greed making me want more information. I guess he must sense my silent tugging because he head inclines slightly. “Don’t push.”

I fight down a grin. “Push what?” His only response to stiffen further. “I’m going to tell you something as a peace offering.” That seems to intrigue him in some way. I can’t tell if it’s a good kind of interested, but I note the slight raise of his eyebrows and his intentional silence. “I didn’t chose not to ask you to play cards.” He gives me no indication of anything, which is fair...considering my vagueness. “I was mad, obviously, and in the middle of deciding on a course of action...and then I fell asleep.”

A long pause of silence. “You fell asleep?”

I’m not sure if his incredulous tone should offend me or not. If I wanted to lie, I’d like to think he knows me well enough to know that I’d have thought of a better excuse than that. Or at least a less embarrassing one. “Yes, it’s not that difficult to believe. Today had been long and all I wanted to do was read, but then Jesper came in to say the oddest things and then leave me to...”

Oh--oh. I guess there’s a reason people say to ‘sleep on’ something. Because now, actively remembering Jesper’s words for the first time since I fell asleep...I understand what Jesper was implying in the oddest way possible. He meant that Kaz and I...that perhaps there is a Kaz and I in a context that’s more than just grammatical. Wow. I really had to realize this with Kaz right in front of me.

My face feels warmer than it did before, an irrational bout of anxiety forcing me to consider that me might be able to read impossible, embarrassing thoughts from my expression alone.

“What did Jesper say?” I’m too lost in my own spiral of confusion and panic and some feeling I can’t recognize to register how Kaz asks his question. There’s an edge to it, an odd one, but that could easily just be Kaz.

This is most definitely the last conversation we need to be having. I’m still mad at him for his earlier dramatics. So I just shake my head, feigning an exhaustion I could lose myself in. “Nothing and everything all at once.” I resist the urge to rub my eyes again. “I’m pretty sure he was drinking, and I wasn’t really listening. I was just trying to read.”

Kaz’s expression hardens briefly as he takes in my words, and then he exhales, nodding once with the breath. “What were you reading?”

My lips part instinctually, ready to spew off details about the latest novel that’s captured my attention. But before I can let myself take off, the reality of the situation strikes me directly in the chest. This is not Nina, or Inej, or even Jesper after what he considers a ‘good night’. This is Kaz Brekker, the man believed to not have a soul. I’ve spoken to him before about casual things, though most of the nights in which we end up playing cards or just sitting near each other are spent in silence. But he’s never prompted me before. Not in the one topic he knows is guaranteed to turn me into an overenthusiastic, gushing fountain of poor summaries and character analysis.

I guess this is his peace offering. This shouldn’t warm the way it does. He was still unbelievably dramatic and treated me like I’m some kind of unreliable fool. “It’s late, and you know how I can be. I’d hate to keep you for nothing more than a poor summary and honestly, an embarrassing rant about plot or characters, because there’s just nothing as frustrating as when two people so clearly care about each other and both are too stubborn and oblivious to acknowledge it.”

Kaz’s eyebrows draw together just enough for me to be able to make out a shift of expression in the poor light. Perhaps his lingering irritation is preparing to rear its ugly head. The corner of his mouth seems to threaten to tilt upwards as Kaz angles his head to the side slightly. “I can’t imagine that position.”

No kidding. I bite my tongue to keep the sarcastic comment and awkward laugh that would sure follow it away. “Who can? That’s like half the point of reading.”

How can interaction feel so over and just at its beginning all at once? I press my lips together to avoid filling the silence with things I’d no doubt instantly regret. It’s easy to be mad at Kaz in the moment. Too easy. But to stay mad at him when his temper has passed and he returns with some kind of begrudging and admittedly awkward and uncertain truce is another task entirely.

“I’ve never understood your attachment to written words.”

“It’s not about understanding, it’s about everything else.”

“And you say I’m cryptic.” Is he...kinda almost joking? I straighten my spine, too tired to fight and too wounded to forgive. “There’s understanding in everything, nothing can survive on sentiment alone.”

“If you read the way I did, you’d understand.”

His lips press together as his expression remains unwavering in its hardness. “Read to me.”

...Interacting with Kaz in any way often leaves me feeling like I’m wandering through unknown territory. But this, this is undeniably different. So different I can’t even think of a way to react. I watch his expression as cautiously as possible. He’s purely reserved, no distinction from the look he wears during business propositions. Except there’s a tightness I can’t quite understand.

Maybe it’s because I don’t want to fight anymore. Maybe it’s because exhaustion is leaving me partially delirious. Or maybe it’s the weird feeling in my chest that I can’t quite place. That I don’t want to place. “Okay.” I shift carefully. “If for no other reason then to prove you wrong.”

Never did I think I’d end up in the position of sitting in my bed, book in hand, with Kaz Brekker sitting next to me. But here we are. I’m so tired, I almost let out a nervous laugh when he first walked in. So brooding and tall, gripping the head of his head cane as he sits at the foot of my bed, on my pastel quilt.

I’m glad for the excuse to keep my gaze away from him and on the words in front of me. I read out loud, feeling more and more comfortable with each page I finish. But as my inhibitions slip away, so dos my hold on consciousness. My eyelids seem to grow heavier with each word that I read.

“You’re falling asleep.”

I straighten my spine on instinct. “Am not.” I’m not sure why I feel the need to deny something so simple.

“You’re impossible.”

From him, that statement is laugh worthy. “I’m impossible? Do you not remember earlier today?”

From the way his jaw locks, I realize that he’s in no mood to be light about this topic. I don’t understand why. It’s not like I’m the one that wronged him. “I remember your lack of focus.”

Keeping my hands at my side to avoid rubbing my eyes, I frown. “If you want to have this argument again, fine. Jesper is more ‘distracted’ than me half the time and you’re much more lenient on him. It’s not like I was flirting with someone or gambling or doing anything but having a two second conversation. One that I needed to have to get information that you wanted.”

The last time we fought, I had more energy to restrain myself. This could be atomic. I hold my breath, waiting for Kaz’s retaliation. He exhales, eyes not meeting mine. “Arguing with you when you’re present is exhausting enough. It’s not worth it when you’re half asleep.”

This angers me further. I hate that he’s right. “I’m not half asleep.” He leaves it at that. I glare even harder at him, slumping further into my bed. “But for the sake of argument, I’ll drop it. Something you’re incapable of doing.”

At that, his eyes meet mine. I try to hold his gaze, but the harder I think about not seeming tired the more exhaustion slips in. A yawn escapes me before he looks away. Great. “I know when to lie in the grass in wait.”

Rolling my eyes, I shift back slightly. He’s incapable of being less dramatic than this. Still, I can’t imagine the effort it’s taking on his part to not start an argument. Maybe this is why Jesper spent so long implying that there may be a Kaz and I in any capacity beyond a vague kind of friendship. “I’ll admit you’re tactful.”

“Resourceful people recognize that trait in other people.”

Blinking twice, I lower my book slightly. Am I truly exhausted, or did he just compliment me in a way? “Careful, I may start to think you find me tolerable.”

“Let’s not exaggerate.” Okay, now I know I’m exhausted because I think he might have just attempted a joke. Rolling my eyes, I decide not to acknowledge this lightness in fear that I’ll scare it away. “Y/n?”

I press my lips together, worried about the destruction of our peace. “Yes?”

“What did Jesper say to you? Earlier?” I pause, slightly unsure why we’re moving backwards.

We’re in a decent place now, and I’d hate to ruin it. I’m too half asleep to lie eloquently. And it’s not like he’s an easily convinced man. “Oh, he said it so cryptically it took me longer than it should have to understand. And it didn’t help that it was something so...well, you might find it funny. As funny as you find anything, anyways.” Wow...I’ve spent such a long time talking. Rubbing the back of my eyes, I avoid his gaze. Exhaustion and awkwardness mix in my stomach oddly. “It seemed like he was trying to imply that you and I...me and you...” Why is this a difficult thing to say? It’s not like I was implying it and Jesper’s known for his oddness. “I think Jesper was implying that there was a you and I, or at least that there could be.” I’m too lost in a haze of almost sleep to watch his reaction. I let my head rest against my headboard even further. “Isn’t that odd?”

He’s quiet for a long second, and then he finally speaks again. “Odd, even for Jesper.” The response doesn’t satiate me...what’s that about? I exhale, deciding that feeling is tomorrow’s problem. When I blink, I decide to let my eyes stay closed. Just for a moment. The sound of something shifting is what makes my eyes squint open. Kaz is standing, his expression unreadable as he straightens. “Goodnight, y/n.”

At that, I sit up slightly, ignoring the exhaustion behind my eyes. “I haven’t finished the chapter.”

“You’ve convinced me of enough.” A concession? How exhausted do I seem? My lips press together as I think of my next argument. Before I can get it out, Kaz leans forward. He grabs the quilt at the end of my bed and tosses it onto my legs casually. “Goodnight, y/n.” The meaning of his repetition is clear. His word is final.

I find enough energy to manage a glare, but I pull the quilt over my legs anyways. “Goodnight, Kaz.”

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker imagine #kaz brekker x you #shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone netflix #shadow and bone imagines #six of crows #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows show #shadow and bone show #six of crows netflix

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reversecreek · 3 years

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clicks onto the dash wearing kitten heels n coyly holding my bang....... hi. me again. it took me so long to select a gif to use on cricket’s intro n i settled on this one bc he looks so unsure abt his smile n it’s rly his essence <3 u can find his pinterest board here n his (work in progress) spotify playlist here. hmu to plot!!!

* alex wolff, cis male + he/him | you know cricket donahue, right? they’re twenty-two, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, all of their life, on and off? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to should have known better by sufjan stevens like, a million times this year, which slipping on wet leaves to photograph a tree struck alight by lightning, delivering a tedtalk to your own reflection to hype yourself up to buy groceries, hiding your hands inside of your sleeves in case you grew an impromptu megan fox thumb overnight thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 1st, so they’re a libra, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( nai, 24, gmt, she/her )

HISTORY:

cricket ws born to a couple tht lived in lilac ridge. their trailer was tucked closest to the woods n always fell under the shade. it was like the leaves wanted to pretend they were a perpetual hanging cloud on the family n that was kind of fitting. their only reason fr having him in the first place was a kind of shrugged like........... we’re under the income bracket we’d get child benefits so why not! may as well try it to rake in some extra cash! needless to say they didn’t rly think it thru or anticipate all of the responsibilities tht came w children n wound up seeing him as an extremely large burden n boy didn’t he know it!

(child neglect & abuse tw) i’ll try to keep this part vague n brief but things were Not Good for cricket growing up. people in lilac ridge didn’t like his parents n it was for a gd reason. he remembers foggy things. being little n wandering around combing the grass with a stick to search for wrappers to suck on bc he was hungry. feeling uneasy when the front door opened. finding out his name was cricket bc the insects used to crawl into their trailer thru the vents n his parents liked to squish them into the carpet -- his mum told him as much once. i think this says a lot. to excessively trim the fat of the story he wound up entering the system at around 8 after his latest and most serious hospital visit. his parents hd to deal w the authorities n last he heard they bounced to evade charges.

(anxiety & violence & trauma tw) cricket sustained a few lifelong injuries from his time in lilac ridge. his knee didn’t heal right which meant he had (n still has to this day) a limp n he’s partially deaf in one ear. he’s always been an incredibly insecure n anxious person so this mde him rly self conscious going into a strange n new environment tht wld b difficult fr any kid to adjust to, nvm w these added worries. he jst felt like something weird to ogle at honestly. he probably wld have felt like that no matter where he was or what he looked like. he cld be in a huge hall of 200 people all wearing the same uniform n he’d still feel like the odd one out. needless to say this didn’t rly help him make friends

cricket’s coping mechanisms were romanticising the things tht other people found ugly or embarrassing or painfully ordinary. he liked it when the rain hit clunky drops against school windows n forbid everyone from playing outside bc he could feel the vibrations through the rubber soles of his shoes n it was a little bit like hearing all of the world at once fr just a moment. he liked medieval fantasy lore about stout gnomes w crumbs in their beards n cheeks red from ale. he liked fallen nests with the remnants of hatched eggs still dirty from the branches n soil they’d hit on the way down. he liked the way the sunlight leaked thru the leaves of the trees in the woods and how, when he sat very still, he could tune into the ringing that was always in his ear n pretend it was coming from the same place, that light thru the leaves, that the angels were trying to talk to him.

he spent a lot of time in the red room at his high skl (i’m begging u this is not a 50 shades reference) (after googling i jst realised it’s called a darkroom bt i’m leaving this fr the sake of sexy bimbo authenticity) n felt quite at home in there. he borrowed a camera whenever he cld (maybe he did yearbook) n photography became his way of immortalising the world as the romanticised version he wanted it to be. his memories were bad bt his photos were beautiful. maybe if he took enough they’d paste over n bleed into each other. maybe bad cld be replaced w beautiful if he tried his very best.

he got placed into fostering w a family once bt apparently didn’t meet the vibe check of their tastes so he wound up returning to the group home he’d initially been placed in. overall this is where he grew up n he aged out the system rather than getting adopted. there was a sense of floundering/isolation/not feeling gd enough in tht bt cricket made do the best he knew how.

that said there were some gd points! (shocking i kno bc his life hs been so fking bleak so far bt please it’s ok........) (is it?) (🤔). basically he interned as an assistant at this local photography studio during high skl working under this kind of whimsical yet endearing old man. suspected wizard possibly in cricket’s eyes, as an avid fantasy genre reader. for one of his bdays said old man / his boss bought him his very own film camera n cricket cried bc he’d never been bought a bday gift. this ws rly embarrassing bc this old man didn’t know how to emote n neither did cricket so he ws jst sort of sat wiping his eyes n sniffling saying he wasn’t crying as the old man pretended to suddenly clean his lenses. when cricket graduated he offered him a full time position there. they do like. wedding photographs n family portraits n all kinds of things...... pay isn’t huge bt it’s something n he Loves taking photos so it’s sexy <3

PERSONALITY:

SUCH an anxious person it’s actually unreal. overthinks absolutely everything he’s ever said. one morning he might hv put green socks on n for the rest of the day he’s nervously looking around like omggggggg they’re all looking at my socks probably thinking im a little green sock boy thinking i’m a fool n a jester this is all everyone’s probably thinking about i hv to hide my green socks..... even tho literally no-one cares

once saw a girl eating a chicken wing n in his head was like ok she likes chicken good future gift idea..... n turned up at her house with an entire rotisserie chicken

probably thinks WAY too hard abt what to write in bday cards n googles like generic ideas that he can use.... u open a card from cricket n it always says smthn weird like “Warmest wishes and love on your birthday and always!” or “You deserve everything happy. Wishing you that all year long!” tht he got off google

nervously fiddles w things a lot. literally anything. his hair. the cuffs of his sleeves. a thread on his bag. u name it

struggles w eye contact sometimes............ it’s like. he wants to talk to ppl n make friends bt he’s honestly so bad at it. he’s fumbling thru life like a nervous headless chicken

ALWAYS has his camera on him. like always. will tke a photo of u bc he thinks u look nice then be like im so sorry im so sorry...... bowing his head shakily holding his camera bc he doesn’t even kno what possessed him he jst thought it’d be a nice photograph bt boundaries exist. probably breathes very heavily over this later in his room panicking thinking he nw seems like hannibal lecter

probably more confident online bc he has time to think abt what he says more.......... i can see him hving a group of online friends tht he’s more confident w. honestly he’s pretty witty at heart he jst has a hard time verbalising things so ppl overlook him sometimes bt once u get to know him more / he’s more comfy he can b a funny little man.....

loves photographs where he cuts something out of them. loves missing spaces n voids. thinks it’s a rly interesting concept when something that isn’t there becomes the focus of a photograph where everything else is. probably loses his mind fr a collage like a front row 1d stan. likes experimenting w light n perception. pretty artistic honestly hs probably made a stop motion film in the past bc that’s just an extended form of photography in his mind bt i doubt he showed anyone

ummm...... very sweet bt like. he reminds me a lot of this quote. “he had the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise.” feel like tht sums him up quite nicely

WANTED CONNECTIONS

someone he met at a wedding: cricket probably ws forced to photograph a wedding fr his boss one time n it cld b interesting as a place to meet from that....... like. i can imagine either it being rly awkward maybe he accidentally spilled a drink on ur muse n was stuttering rly apologetic n it ws just a train wreck. or mayb they took pity on him or even (in a shocking turn of events) a shine to him n invited him to drink n dance. omgggg the thought of cricket trying to dance makes me wna die n probably mkes cricket wna hyperventilate bt idk maybe he went wild n let loose. mayb they wound up damaging the camera somehow. mayb they had to scramble to get another one n ur muse covered the cost n it was a strange late night excursion tht cricket thought about a lot since. cricket probably vowed to pay them bk somehow no matter what. idk. we can work things out. lots of diff options here. doesn’t have to b a wedding either can b any event tht required a photographer

ppl he went to school w: pretty self explanatory i suppose...... maybe they were frm completely different worlds..... mayb ur muse was popular n cricket was definitely not but they got paired fr an assignment n had to work on a project together....... mayb cricket asked ur muse on a date one time n it was completely embarrassing bc he didn’t realise they had a bf n it haunts cricket at night still bc he’s rly dramatic.... mayb ur muse felt sry fr him n ate lunch w him n inducted him into their group like a lost puppy finding a home.... world’s our oyster

neighbours from his brief time at lilac ridge: not to reference taylor swift but i’m gna reference taylor swift n say we cld do a seven inspired plot here. sighs a little..... then sighs a lot. he was here ages 0-8 so idk. we cld work out childhood plots perhaps....

sickening simp: i mean.............. cricket probably gets crushes on ppl so easily like just. anyone who’s the slightest bit nice to him.................. he’s a disgrace. ok i take it back. bt also please get it together freak............... i didn’t say that. he’d probably b extra nice to this person n try n pay close attention to things they liked so he cld get them little gifts. just a bit embarrassing n lovestruck bless his heart. wldn’t expect anything back tho honestly that just isn’t something he tends to do.

let’s go gays: cricket’s bi but he probably was rly in his head abt liking boys n tried to sort of squash it internally during his younger yrs...... i think he’s more comfy w it now MAYBE idk bt back then i picture him having a friend tht ws kind of like. similarly loserish as him perhaps (no offence to ur muse potentially filling this plot or cricket bt let’s face the facts) n they’d hang out n play games a lot n one time it jst kind of happened n he was like............. *struts in looking around sharply* What going on here? except not. bc it’s cricket. more like *shambles in looking around anxiously* What’s, uh... What’s... the happenings? S--... I’m sorry. (immediate apology for saying what’s the happenings bc nobody talks like that n it was an impulsive panic bc he didn’t know what else to say)

those who grew up in the system w him: maybe at the group home or i’d also like the family that fostered him n said sayonara. honestly i imagine the parents just thought he ws a bit too much of a handful / had too much baggage which is rly quite merciless n terrible but. if u think that aligns w ur muses home situation hmu......

um. can’t think of more bt just anything honestly. jst go wild.......

#irvingintro #abuse tw #neglect tw #trauma tw #anxiety tw #violence tw #DOES A LITTLE JIG #admittedly i didnt include a formative moments section like my other intros bc idk what kind of superpowers i was inhaling the fumes of #for those intros but #i'm a mere mortal now.

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cruddyborderlandstheories · 4 years

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Debuff Zane Build

i am tired of not seeing this build in all the zane build videos i watch so im sharing it here because its stupid fun bc u run fast and kill faster. it’s not meta, but its fun as fuck and u have a lot of damage and survivability with it. I’ve completed M4 Slaughter Shaft with it- haven’t tried on M10 yet but i have faith. p.s its 4 am pls have mercy if there’s spelling mistakes.

what ur gonna need is a band of sitorak, zheitseiv’s eruption, a seein’ dead, and the piss grenade. everything else is fair game, whatever u want. try to get it to have the sntl cryo anoint bc good. but u must have the 4 main items for this to work perfectly (it also somewhat works with a low level Frozen Heart bc best shield in the game but you will die a lot more)

also i need a fucking name for this build help

oh god oh fuck i forgot i was playing through the handsome jackpot dlc again

oki im ready to party

this is my current loadout

sometimes i switch the reg Q-System for a kaoson or a nighthawkin if i need ammo (OP QSystem is... OP but not as fun as a tracking grenade QSystem so i don’t care for it) and maybe the brainstormer for a reflux if many shielded enemies (i prefer the brainstormer over the reflux atm. so try for a brainstormer!!)

3rd slot, that’s a monarch which used to be a dictator b4 it got a straight upgrade. I actually don’t use the bipod unless im in a boss fight and don’t need to move fast. usually violent momentum and violent violence cover the dps loss

ur first 3 gun slots honestly don’t matter much. I have my reasons for using them, but you can use whatever u want i think, so long as its a strong weapon (bc unfortunately a lot of weapons are not scaled for m10). u dont HAVE to use the monarch or the Q system or the brainstormer. I recommend them, cuz theyre fun, but u don’t gotta if u wanna swap em out for a a kaoson or a yellowcake or a sandhawk or smth

the last gun is my zheitsev’s eruption. This bad boy, when u reload, shoots out homing balls of debuffery. So every enemy that gets hit with these gets a debuff. I have tried this with the needler but I prefer Zheitsev’s bc it can hit more enemies and once and takes less time. this gun only goes to Blane (ur clone).

for the skill trees we have no points in under cover even tho brainfreeze is the best skill in the gaaaaame

explanations:

really the hitman tree is p self explanatory, u wanna go fast as fuck boiii. My band of sitorak does not have the +15 movespeed while zoomer is active anoint (it has the break shield amp anoint, which is p okay. want movespeed, but a nice human from the reddit gave me this sitorak so i didn’t have to farm). u want drone delivery bc Blane will NOT be throwing grenades. If you try to make him throw grenades with the seein’ dead he will ONLY throw grenades and never fire his gun, meaning he’ll never reload. it’s a nightmare. anyway. u want the piss grenade (ideally with the +25% damage on thrown anoint). im not looking forward to regrinding this when they finally mayhem buff grenades.

we put one point into playing dirty because we want those extra shots and honestly with the amount of times seein’ dead can proc ur kill skills you’ll have it more often than not

we also have points in good misfortune for that sweet sweet uptime (which btw can be infinite using the brainstormer/reflux bc it is essentially a redistributor without the need for ur barrier) the monarch/dictator also does it justice

for Blane u DON’T WANT praemuntis. we want blane reloading as often as gotdamn possible. now unfortunately my seein’ dead gave me a +weapon mag size roll (im actually not sure if this affects blane, but im assuming it does) but it does have the amazing +5 donnybrook so I’m taking it anyway. I am so not looking forward to regrinding a good class mod when they finally release action skill buffs for them. i cri. i actually hear 3 points in donnybrook and 2 in violent violence is p good (or 1 in violent violence 1 in playin dirty) so maybe grinding won’t be so bad. maybe i’ll finally get a +weapon damage roll

u can grab 1 point in ducttape mod and put 4 points into borrowed time if you want. it doesn’t really matter. i current have 5 in borrowed time and 3 in pocket full of grenades (for some reason??? usually i only put 2 in.). U can do that and use those extra points for either ducttape mod or more points in playing dirty.

u NEED quick breather. This skill has a STUPID interaction with the band of sitorak shield because of how quickly it recharges. I’m talking, the instant you swap with Blane, you have full shields and so does he. It’s dumb, I love it. Use it to get out of trouble.

so im probably gonna need to explain why i have 3 points in trick of the light: im a cryo slut. That’s it. put those wherever you want, just make sure you can get Double Barrel. i’ve seen builds where people actually go for brainfreeze, i might try that next time i respec.

Double barrel will make it so blane can use the zheitsev’s eruption and debuff your enemies for you. it’s worth it.

so the augments u want are these:

SCHADENFREUDE. because band of sitorak has such a tiny capacity, ur shield is constantly up. If its not, it’s constantly breaking from full capacity. this does have a fun effect with the amp shield break anoint, but mainly i like it for the 25% damage buff whenever it breaks. its a tradeoff for damage, ur constantly swapping between max shields and more damage, so its actually p constant survivability and damage over the long run.

i grab doppelbanger bc blane sometimes gets stuck in the floor and/or i don’t feel like running all the way back. i wouldn’t recommend getting which one’s real or digital distribution only bc u want him alive as much as possible. u can also get binary system instead of doppelbanger, its up to you

for Zoomer u want bad dose for the movement speed and (sometimes) static field (only if the enemies have shields). this is so if blane goes down or he isn’t taking damage, zoomer can refill ur shields. if the enemies won’t have shields usually i grab winter’s drone or boomsday depending on how i feel.

im actually gonna try to see if i can’t grab brain freeze. hang on. i know trick of the light is frowned upon for most people so lemme just respec. (im sorry i just love the vibes it gives me it’s like HAHA you thought that was me? no!!! boop. and then they’re ice sculptures and man i love h2o i wish emma had frozen more people the only people she really freezes are Greg and Miriam and honestly she doesn’t even kill Greg smh. (Greg is dr denman’s assistant. greg is highkey god.) I do like what she did to Mirami, the fucking implications that YES these teenage girls ARE powerful enough to instakill people, they just don’t out of the kindness of their hearts. Rikki was badass that episode too. actually i love the episode where rikki almost boils a dude alive for making a fool of her with ILLEGAL F I S H and burns people using steam from a pipe. rikki is my favorite mermaid- she knew what was u p. I wish mako mermaids was as badass as h2o was. and the cartoon. god imagine the cartoon violence. sigh. let them use their op superpowers to be SUPERHEROES. like in h2o au i have baron flynt puppeteer people to their deaths from Thor bc he has cleo’s powers like why couldn’t she do that to someone. Like dr denman “lmao bye bitch” or even charlotte (who imho wasn’t bad until cleo started being rude to her. cleo was 100% at fault that season). it wouldn’t have killed her!!! ... instantly. probably. ive never seen avatar in full but i did watch the blood bending episode as a child and as i understand it that’s frowned upon but hey. CAN BELLA TURN PEOPLE INTO JELLY?? harry potter 🅱oneless arms... my god.)

anyway, respeccing.

there goes all my money. rip.

so i think im gonna have to live with the slower reload speed (sob) but yes u can in fact get brain freeze with this build. lemme show...

so ye in the event u just can’t live without freezing people (i know the feeling) feel free to do this. imma play with this for a bit and see if i can live with slower reload. I actually depend on the 100% cryo with zoomer active for all my cryo damage. i also use an ice breaker so they freeze fairly easy (but only on mobs. on bosses u want the snowdrift or something else)

this build isn’t really meta and u might have trouble doing a solo run of true takedown on m10... bc its true takedown on m10, but honestly it’s fun as F U C K. you CAN do it, but it’s not no thoughts head empty like barrier-redistrubutor/yellowcake zane can be so u gotta be on TOP of ur SHIT. i love it. running around killing stuff. it’s fun. i also love teleporting. it’s my FAVORITE THING. I STILL GET GIDDY OVER IT BECAUSE IT’S SO FUN. ask my friends, they will tell you, sometimes i’ll just start gushing over how much fun it is to teleport even though i’ve played zane since release. just. GFDGHKJGDFK so much fun. i just... b o o p. god i love this game. i took a break to play assassin’s creed odyssey (fun sneaky beaky game, pretty awful dialogue) so DAMN i missed this.

here’s a link to a video I took on athenas (my favorite area to run. it’s this game’s bloodshot stronghold!) this is the playlist i listen to while playing Zane. i keep swapping songs during play bc sometimes they don’t fit my vibe or i get tired of them lol (spotify control is hooked to my 4th and 5th mouse buttons so i don’t have to stop playing) i forgot where my shock sandhawk was in my inventory, is what i use to demolish traunt. i was so scared i threw it in my bank earlier on sanc-iii lol (also yes i still slap blane’s ass. it’s to encourage him to kill)

and here’s a link to the save + everything I had on me at the moment (including the stuff i picked up in the vid in case u want it lol) cuz im lazy and don’t feel like clearing out my inventory. some of these are only m4-9. which ones? it is a mystery. you’ll know when the new update releases ;) (no but actually im so hype for mayhem level on the item cards. finally. FINALLY!!!)

why is this video taking so long to upload. hynnnggggg

oh god is that the sun

#borderlands #bl3 #fuk it uploading while the video processes #zane flynt #zane build

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wayward-pendragon · 4 years

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Ultimate taekook rec (pt.1??)!

Hello friends! Quarantine has a lot of us stuck inside so I’m gonna try and keep the fic recs comin and hopefully give y’all something to enjoy while we all stay home :) Taekook is one of my fav ships, I think their personalities fit really well and they are such a fun pair. All of these fic are from ao3 and they’re usually a little on the long side but I’ll throw in some short one-shots as well! This will likely be a pt1 bc i have soooo many taekook bookmarks on ao3. Let’s get started! (I have another BTS fic rec here if you would like more things to read!)

Bite Me by Curionenene, YeonAh

Summary: “Ho… Hoseok… my na- Ju-Jung Hoseok. Who— what…?”

On hindsight, maybe it wasn't the best idea to reveal your name to two lunatics who had fed you something from a blood bag at 11.54 pm in the middle of a quiet, isolated alleyway.

"Hoseok? Nice to meet you, Hoseok. I'm Kim Namjoon, and this is Kim Seokjin. Do you remember what happened to you?"

“I—”

“Seriously. Just tell him like I did you. It's like pulling off a band-aid, better fast than slow.”

A heavy sigh was Namjoon's response to Seokjin's interjection. "I think this is a bad idea, but alright. Hoseok, you nearly… well… you did die. I saved your life the only way I could. By turning you into a vampire."

On hindsight, maybe it was a really, really, really bad idea.

One unfortunate near-death later, Hoseok finds out a few things: One, vampires are real. Two, they don't sparkle. Three, a war is brewing and he's landed in the middle of it.

Or: AU in which Hoseok screams a lot

okay so I love this fic to the ends of the earth and back. It starts out as Hoseok centred when he is turned into a vampire but then starts to focus on other characters and storylines as well. The Taekook in this is very slow burn but seeing the evolution of their relationship killed me. This fic reads like a full ass novel and I highly highly recommend giving it a read.

refrigerator humming, chewing gum and instant karma by locks

Summary: Taehyung sets the flowers down on the dining table, plucking the card off the little holder. "Dearest Taehyung, just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you. I hope you're thinking about me too. Love--" he pauses and squints before cocking an eyebrow and pursing his lips. "Hyung, why is the boss of your little boy band gang professing his love for me?"

Yoongi drops the noodles on the floor with a loud curse as he burns his hand.

Or, Taehyung's been trying his hardest to avoid Yoongi's criminal life for a long ass time, but a cute kid and his infuriating father keep pulling him deeper into the mix.

Mob boss JK but soft mob boss with his son I cannotttt. Watching the evolution of Tae and JK’s relationship was hella cute and fun. Also taekook with kids is just so soft omggg.

cuz in a sky full of stars (i think i saw you) by wowoashley

Summary: taehyung always has bad ideas. and jeongguk thinks this might be the best.

Proposal AU!! Jungkook needs a guest to bring to the Namjin wedding and it seems like his assistant Taehyung is just the man for the job. This is so sweet but angsty near the end, honestly so goodddd.

maybe we’re all just fools by airplanewishes

Summary: Jeongguk likes to run. He’s never wanted anyone to run with him before.

Fake dating AU! Jungkook’s on the school track team and his mother is bothering him about dating someone which JK really doesn’t wanna do so that’s where Tae comes in. Honestly it’s hella cute but also hella angst, highly recommend.

cliff drop gradient by astringxnt

Summary: “somewhere along the way, we will all realize that we only start chasing the things that we were once given a taste of.”

(or, in which Jungkook and Taehyung get married to qualify for more financial aid.)

Weeee love fake dating AUs in this house. Basically Taekook need money so they get married but nothing really changes at first, but then they start to realize their feelings for each other :))

let me know by wowoashley

Summary: taehyung never wears a shirt

JK moves into an new home and his neighbour just happens to be Taehyung. Through this, JK goes on a journey to discovering he is attracted to Tae and it’s really good but angst w/ a happy ending.

Cinnamon Crisp by teatimetaemint

Summary: Jungkook needs his daily dose of cuddles and Taehyung likes to wear Jungkook's clothes. They don't care that alphas and omegas aren't supposed to be best friends.

SO MUCH FLUFF. Im not a huge ABO lover but this is such a sweet story and they care about each other sm it warms my heart. Childhood friends to lovers is also one of my weaknesses sooo.

Date Me by flywithtaetae (kimtaehyungs)

Summary: Taehyung flirts with the cute high school boy and relishes in the flustered reaction he gets for almost an entire year. But when the following year comes along, he finds himself choking on his own words.

One of the only shorter fics on this list and omgggggggggg it sooooo cuteeeeee.

I knew I loved you then (but you’d never know) by nutaella

Summary: 'You asked me to the store with you and your child, and now my distant relative we met thinks I'm married with a baby' AU

Another shorter one but its so sweet. Jungkook has a little bb son and Taehyung is helping his bestie raise his son and they get mistaken for a couple.

beep boop by vvpa

Summary: Taehyung’s gaydar is broken. Maybe. Probably, at least. Jungkook can’t really tell.

This one was so funny omgggggg. Its short but so wholesome and funny as hell I actually laughed out loud.

15.30 - Appointment: Kim Taehyung for Jeon Jeongguk (genital piercing) by PaperTigerBlackAndWhite

Summary: Taehyung makes a bet, the forfeit of which is getting his dick pierced.

He loses the bet.

Good thing the piercer has nice eyes. And face. And hands. Not so nice that he seems to keep laughing at Taehyung, but you can't have everything.

This one is also hilarious omg. Tae getting his dick pierced was never something I thought I would read but here we are. Warning, this has a lot of smut so if that’s not your thing don’t read.

You’re So Special by miniimin

Summary: Sometimes you find your soulmate in the form of a dirty kid on the playground. Sometimes it takes a little longer to figure it out, but that's okay - in the meantime, you have a best friend.

(Or: Jeongguk falls in love before he knows what the word means. Taehyung spends all his years teaching him.)

This is one of the absolute sweetest fics I have ever read. It follows Tae and Kook as they grow up from little kids to uni and its so sweet. If u want something wholesome and makes u feel things, read this.

Fall Asleep (Fall For You) by drannie

Summary: “They say when you fall in love you can’t fall asleep, but now that I’ve met you I feel like I finally can.”

A University AU where Jungkook and Taehyung become roommates. But Jungkook has insomnia and can't fall asleep with other people and Taehyung can't fall asleep alone.

oh boi is the angst real w/ this one. It is one of the best taekook fics on ao3 for a reason. I highly recommend giving this one a read.

Chemistry by taecheeks

Summary: “What’s your zodiac sign?”

“Virgo,” Jungkook responds without thinking. He frowns, glaring. “Why?”

“Hm, I can work with that,” Taehyung says. “I’m a Capricorn.”

“Fascinating. Now back to Chemistry -”

“Isn’t that what I was talking about?”

[Or, Jungkook just wants to get his tutoring sessions with the President's son over with. Taehyung just wants to get his cute tutor under him.]

This one is longgggggg. Basically JK tutors Tae and everything progresses from there. Honestly this fic has a lot of elements to it and I really just love it. It deals with a lot of different themes like child abuse, panic attacks, and many other things so if any of that upsets you, this fic may not be done for you. The entire series is is really cute tho plz read.

fever started long ago by thestarsabove

Summary: Where there is love, there is warmth. Where there is honesty, there is relief.

In which Taehyung eats a magical fortune cookie and wakes up physically dependent on Jeongguk’s body heat.

A canon compliant fic rec and boi is it will written. Basically tae becomes dependent on JK’s body heat which ik sounds weird but its a really goof fic trust.

maybe we’re fireproof by thestarsabove

Summary: For as long as Jeongguk can remember (and even before that too), his body has been on fire.

Same author as the fic above and just as amazing. Not canon compliant this time and this now JK has problems w/ body heat. Hella recommend this author is fantastic.

Dogs Days by vestals

Summary: Chopa the corgi needs to be sent to dog school, and it just so happens that his trainer is, in Kim Taehyung's opinion, the finest man out there.

Too bad he's already got a boyfriend.

Okay so this one I was skeptical to read but I’m real happy I did. This fic was sooo good, the build up was killer and I really enjoyed it. There is quite a bit of smut in this one, you have been warned.

It’s gonna be you (I can’t let go) by OnlyWinterHere

Summary: "The sound of the crowd screaming is deafening. After four years, he should be used to it, but today he needs silence more than ever. Still, Taehyung smiles, because if there's something he's learned how to do is smiling even when he feels like dying."

Or the one where Jungkook gets a girlfriend and Taehyung can't cope.

This one hurttttttttt. If you are in the mood for some angst and sadness here is the fic for you. Happy ending tho and honestly it’s a really good fic. Also the yoomin spinoff is *chef’s kiss*.

5 millimeters per fucking second by Curionenene

Summary: Jungkook is painfully shy and he wants to do things with his boyfriend Taehyung.

(Or: the kind of slow burn you never knew you needed.)

AWWW this one is the sweetest omgggg. This brings an entirely new meaning to slow burn and it is so precious I can’t.

i wanna come put your lips on mine by locks

Summary: Taehyung glances over at him and with the light hitting the side of his face, throwing shadows over his face, Jeongguk can't bring himself to be that bothered about their date. Sure being alone would have been nice, but he thinks this is nice, too. He's with Taehyung, they got their dinner and movie. Just maybe next time they hopefully won't have his brothers as chaperones.

And when Taehyung puts his head on Jeongguk's shoulder later, he can't bring himself to be that mad at all, actually.

Or, it turns out Taehyung and Jeongguk share the same brothers: Fraternity for Jeongguk, and for Taehyung, well, blood.

This is another sweet fic. JK and Tae trying to date behind Tae’s brother’s backs is kinda hilarious and adorable.

Well folks that’s it for now but I have so many more so if y’all are interesting in a pt.2 let me know!! I hope you love these fics as much as I did. If you want other ship recs let me know and I’ll try my best to accommodate! Stay safe and healthy everyone!

#taekook #vkook #kim taehyung #jeon jeongguk #jeon jungkook #bts #bts fic #bts fic rec #taekook fic rec #taekook fic #ao3 #bangtan sonyeondan #bangtan #fanfiction #fanfic #fic rec

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silverandarsenic-hcs · 4 years

Note

Going off of the break-up headcanons (they broke my heart btw) what about some cheating headcanons? As in, an S/O that is caught cheating by one of the Papas or Copia.

Hello i am glad those break up hcs got to yall bc i was really hoping they would. also one of the other asks from wattpad was the opposite of this one, how would they react if they were caught cheating on their s/o and how would they earn back their trust, so another long full band one! also im only doing the ones i WANT TO because this is MY (and nyx’s) BLOG and thats that

Papa I: Old fashioned man does not cheat. He simply doesn’t. he shockingly still believes in true love, and soulmates, and The One, after all this time. If ever did cheat it would take enough liquor for his eyes to stop working and a really manipulative person to make him think it was you. and if that happened, he would surely run right home and tell you. he would explain that he never wanted it, and that it shouldn’t have happened, and every little detail he can remember, and expect forgiveness. Unfortunately, bc he’s so ass over tits for the idea of love, if his s/o cheated on him for any reason, he wouldn’t show that he’s bothered any more than he has too. all he wants is to be with you. to be together. he won't let something like a pesky infidelity keep him from that.

Papa II: Like I said before, he has no time for the trivial. if youre not in it for the long run, you’re a one night stand, and even then. The only thing he would possibly cheat for is if he started to have feelings for someone else, but he knows that means he never cared about the first person enough, so he would probably leave sooner than he would cheat. but if everything happened so suddenly with the new person... maybe he would get himself too tied up before he could end things with the first. And he would feel awful about it. But if he was full into his s/o and found out they cheated, he would be heartbroken. Devastated. You're not the person he thought you were. you never were that person. he doesn't even know who you are anymore. there's no point in trying to forgive or beg for it in his eyes - some mistakes you can't write over. some trust you cant win back.

Papa III: He... has dabbled in poly relationships. he quickly establishes these limits with any new partner - can you sleep with other people, what counts as cheating, how is the situation handled? - and makes sure he knows the rules that you're both comfortable with. so in that sense, he’s never cheated. but he has slept with others outside of his relationship, with his partners express knowledge. that being said, he’s been cheated on plenty of times when his partners agreed to be monogamous and lied. the worst part about it is he gave them a chance to say what they wanted, and made sure they knew that the rules could change at any time if they talked about it, but they still went behind his back and made him look like a fool. And III doesn’t take very kindly to being made a fool.

Cardinal Copia: Morally Ambiguous Copia Mode: Enabled. He would cheat if he felt he need to. if it would get him where he wanted to be - that includes any bosses or higher ups (youre telling me he was III’s assistant and never sucked him off??? ok....) but he wouldn’t cheat for any other reason. and he would DEFINITELY keep it a secret. the less they know the better, for both of them. If his s/o cheated on him for any reason they could have avoided, there will be hell to pay. that is, if he stays. the chances of him ever trusting you he wont check your phone, or ask where youve been, he just wont ask at all because he assumes anything you tell him will be a lie. he wants you to know that he doesnt care what you say, whether you can make it up to him eventually or it tears you two apart.

Dew: Shockingly good at being faithful and loyal, but, we all slip up sometimes. out of all the people he’s been with, hes only cheated on two of them, and it was because he couldn’t stop himself - believe me, he tried. he was just so desperate and you weren't around and they were throwing themselves at him... what do you expect? but it’s not something he makes a habit of, and he feels worse about it than he expects his s/o will. if they ever cheated on him, he would feel just as bad. probably blame himself for not being good enough, or not being there when you wanted him. the worst thing that could happen is that if it wasn’t only cheating, but a full blown affair. if they had feelings for the other person, and didn’t want to be with him anymore. that would break his little heart.

Swiss: i just made a little separate post abt this for him. Swiss is a serial cheater. You would think he’d know this about himself, but he constantly gets into relationships and agrees to be monogamous because he thinks he’s changed, but really, he hasn’t. and he doesn’t cheat with malicious intent ever, he just likes the thrill of doing something he knows he shouldn’t, and doesnt think its reasonable of anyone to expect him to only be having one lover when theres so many people in the world to love. Inversely, if he caught or found out his s/o was cheating before he got the chance, he would lose his mind. Go on about how could you betray his trust like that, and how he’ll never love again. really toxic out here im not going to lie. But he doesn’t really care, he just wants to make you feel bad, and hes onto the next in less than a few hours.

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scintillating-galaxias · 5 years

Text

give ‘em hell, darling

Chapter Two—Step 1

Sandalphon appears to read Aziraphale his charges and to collect him from Earth.

(read it here on ao3!)

“An’, get this angel.”

“What?”

“She told ‘im, ‘nothin’ wrong with the economy, just get your arse up and find a job!’” Crowley hooted loudly, sloshing a considerable amount of wine down the fist gripping the stem of the glass. Aziraphale, glassy-eyed, miracled it back into the cup. “An’ she hasn’t worked in years! ”

Aziraphale shook his head, tutting. “What did you do?”

“Nicked her credit card and left it for the bum.”

“Crowley…! Alright, I would have given him money anyway. Stealing from the rich, giving to the poor, or something like that.”

“See, you get it.”

A very sharp rapping on the door rudely interrupted Crowley’s drunken rendition of a fool he had made out of a woman on the street criticizing a homeless man.

“Someone’s here,” said Crowley after a minute.

“Obviously,” said Aziraphale. “Doors don’t knock themselves.”

“No, I bloody well know that!” hissed Crowley, drunkenness slurring his vigilance. “Someone’s here! Aren’t you closed right now?” He stiffened abruptly, nostrils flaring slightly. “I can feel it—someone holy. Smells like bleach.”

Oh, dear. Murmuring some very mild curses, Aziraphale quickly sent the alcohol in his system back into the bottles and then told the bottles to return to the dusty cabinets from which they came. He straightened his bow-tie and after he swallowed dryly, called, “One moment, please!”

“What the Heaven do they want? I thought you said they’d leave us alone!” hissed Crowley. He had sobered himself up as well and was agitatedly pacing back and forth, shooting poisonous looks at the closed door, which shuddered fearfully in its doorframe.

“I’m not sure,” Aziraphale said.

“We’ve wasted enough time already,” said a sharp voice, laced with—glee? That couldn’t be good. Aziraphale pushed down his growing concern and made for the door. “Open up. I know you’re not—ah.”

“Good day, Sandalphon,” Aziraphale greeted tersely. “What business brings you to Earth?”

“You,” Sandalphon answered with a grin that was too wide to be natural. His gold-teeth, hardly having to be changed for his human appearance, glinted. He produced a stack of papers and brandished them. “You’re being recalled to Heaven.”

The shot of dread that fired through Aziraphale’s body made him feel weak-kneed. He resisted stumbling by sheer force of will and managed to coolly ask, “Why?”

Sandalphon stepped inside the room without invitation. He glanced derisively about, empty eyes moving derisively from Aziraphale’s dusty shelf of not-for-sale (read: favorite) books, to the antique rug, and finally, to Crowley, who curled his lip and let his forked tongue flicked menacingly. “Your performance lately has been lacking,” Sandalphon said, refocusing his stony stare on Aziraphale. “Heaven has decided you’re no longer the best suited for this job.”

Crowley snorted ungracefully while Aziraphale blinked disbelievingly.

“You’re kidding,” said Crowley. “Was there another angel who’s secretly been on Earth this whole time?”

“Am I—Am I being fired?” Aziraphale asked incredulously.

Sandalphon’s plastic grin stretched wider, somehow. “No. You’re being recalled. You should be fired, but this is the next most appropriate action to take.”

“That’s not—Never mind.” Aziraphale discreetly wiped his hands on the backside of his coat. “What about my, erm, performance has been failing?”

Sandalphon gestured to Crowley. “Obviously,” he said shortly, “ that has not been permanently banished to the deepest pits of Hell.”

Aziraphale bristled as Crowley loudly said, “I am right here. ”

“And,” Sandalphon continued, unperturbed, “your reports have been disappointingly lackluster. You’ve reported nearly the exact same interactions with humanity from this particular part of the world for the last year, and the year prior to that, and the year prior to that. And the two hundred before that.” He sighed in the morose manner you’d expect from a greedy boss denying you a raise. “Our expectations for you have simply not been met.”

Azirphale gritted his teeth and forced out, “May I see exactly what expectations you are referring to?”

To his surprise, Sandalphon actually handed over the papers. Aziraphale took them, staring suspiciously at first at Sandalphon, then the papers. Crowley’s lip curled as Sandalphon pointed out a paragraph on the first page.

“You’ll see here that the terms to your assignment are laid out quite clearly,” he said. Lines began to highlight themselves in golden light, obviously larger points of discussion. Aziraphale scowled. He filed his own taxes to the point of investigation by the British government, for Heaven’s sake, he knew how to read the small-print. The light only served to amplify the bleak blackness of the curling Enochian. “To begin, you were given the task of protecting the humans of the Garden of Eden from Evil. This included the terrible temptation of Eve.” Sandalphon shot Crowley a nasty look. He shrugged unapologetically. “You were charged with a Holy Blade of Flame by the Almighty to assist you in this task. However, you lost it mere week later, and it ended up in the hands of the one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, War.”

“It—That was to help the humans! It was in the name of good!” Aziraphale did not like where this was going. “It was cold. I could not send them back into the Garden after their ejection by the Almighty—but I had to do something.”

“Which brings me to my next point…”

Crowley rolled his eyes. Aziraphale could only grit his teeth and listen as Sandalphon went down a list of his apparent misdemeanors with excruciating detail and slowness. Being unable to keep peace in a small village teeming with anger over a corrupt political situation in 2200 BC, allowing said political situation to become corrupt, warning families of a blight in 13 AD, healing people who Heaven wanted dead in 403 AD, miracling people to full recovery during the Bubonic Plague, and, most recently—

“You’ve been observed to be indulging greatly in the sin of gluttony—”

“Now, just one minute,” Aziraphale interrupted, beginning to feel panicked.

Sandalphon’s smile turned sour. “Angels can’t sin. This goes without saying. However, you’ve clearly proven yourself to be something else ever since that little stunt with the Hellfire. We don’t know what you are. Obviously not Fallen, but you’re not Unfallen, either. Gluttony is a sin no matter what you are. It’s only appropriate we treat it as such.”

Aziraphale froze. Beside him, Crowley had also gone still. Crowley had recounted exactly what had happened to him while he was in Heaven, including Uriel’s disgusted comment of, “What is he?” Evidently, it had not gone unnoticed. Admittedly, it was a rather logical question to ask. But Aziraphale couldn’t answer, “I don’t know either,” and he couldn’t explain what he and Crowley had done to escape extinction. That would only tell Heaven they could try again, and get the results they wanted this time. He swallowed and said nothing at all.

“So,” drawled Sandalphon, “the sin of gluttony. Gabriel noticed you partaking in some Earthly food while he was here. You explained it was for your human disguise. However, you’ve been recorded sullying your heavenly body with gross matter for centuries now. You don’t need to eat. Therefore, anything you consume can be considered excessive and unnecessarily.”

“That’s bollocks,” Crowley cut in. Both angels turned to him, Sandalphon in annoyance, Aziraphale in surprise.

“What?” said Sandalphon.

“That’s wrong,” Crowley said impatiently. “I’m the demon here, I should know what sin is. Gluttony’s supposed to be, y’know, an excess of food or wealth or whatever withheld from the needy. Sure, he eats a lot for an angel”—Crowley pulled his face into a ‘well, what can I say?’ frown—“ans he eats every day like most humans do. But he’s never sat around and ate big ol’ honeyed hams and wine all day while telling the poor people to piss off. I would know; I’ve been, erm, adversary-ing him for six thousand years.”

Thank you, cried Aziraphale internally, but Sandalphon was not impressed.

“Then what of these books?” he said at once. “Surely you don’t think we haven’t noticed the way he hoards these things. They are a symbol of status he refuses to part with, even for the innocent human pursuit of knowledge.”

“That’s different! Humans don’t need books the same way they need food.”

“Fine,” Sandalphon said with great reluctance. “The food is excluded. Then do tell me, demon; what is the reasoning for his reluctancy?”

Sandalphon turned to Aziraphale, who had gone quite pale.

“Their contents would be wasted on them,” he said. “It would be a tragedy, really.” He wanted to say collectors only bought them for the name, but he knew that wasn’t true; most collectors were just like him, in reality. The only difference is that Aziraphale has been there, living the events that inspired the legendary books of their times. There was no experience like it. Any modern day collectors were simply grasping for a way to experience a past they never could live. And for as long as a story is passed around humanity, it is eventually lost in the mess. As long as they were with Aziraphale, they were safe.

Sandalphon raised an eyebrow. His bald head was shining in the lamplight. “You wouldn’t even spare that moment of joy for a human? They don’t have forever to indulge themselves.” Sandalphon took Aziraphale’s guilty press of his lips as a victory. His eyes shone triumphantly. “Do you have anything to say for yourself, Principality?”

Aziraphale blinked once and let all pretenses of politeness slide off of his face. “Nothing you would sincerely listen to.”

“Aziraphale!” Crowley whirled on him, gripping Aziraphale’s forearm in one hand and gesturing furiously with the other. “Wha’—You can’t just go with him!” he snapped. “There’s—You haven’t hardly got to make a case for yourself!”

Aziraphale forced a weak smile for Crowley. He patted his bony hand gently. “It’s looking like I’m having little choice in the matter, my dear.”

“Hell, even Hell at least has a jury!”

“Yes, well… this is Heaven after all.” Aziraphale leveled an icy glare at Sandalphon who shifted uncomfortably. “They can do no wrong. Can they.”

“No,” Sandalphon said airily, sounding severely less confident. His mouth opened to say something else, only it opened, and then nothing at all came out. In fact, it stayed perfectly still, as did the rest of the room; the dust motes froze mid-flight, the swaying of Sandalphon’s trench-coat was caught in a dramatic turn—

“Crowley?”

“Aziraphale, they can’t take you again!” Crowley had a snarl on his face as he angrily waved his hands in the air. “They brought a demon last time for the Hellfire, they’ll bring another to—to torture you, or something! You won’t last a second! Or they’ll find you over to Hell itself—!”

“I’m tougher than you think,” Aziraphale assured him gently.

Crowley’s face crumpled. “I want to believe you, angel, I do. But this is Heaven’s punishments we’re talking about.”

Aziraphale’s heart ached at the fear in Crowley’s voice. He took Crowley’s cold hand and folded it tightly in his own two hands, holding it against his chest. “I understand your concern, my dear. But I’ll be alright. They’re operating out of fear, at the moment, I’m sure.”

Crowley furiously shook his head and wrapped his other hand around Aziraphale’s, gripping it as though he would vanish right then and there. Which, Aziraphale thought grimly, he very well might be. “It doesn’t matter what they’re operating out of! They want to get rid of you—”

“That may be so. But I think that Heaven is being a tad ambitious,” Aziraphale said primly.

Crowley stared at him. Then he took off his sunglasses to really drive in the disbelief shining in his—entirely yellow, Aziraphale noted guiltily—eyes. “Aziraphale, what are you saying?”

“There is no such thing as luck,” he said delicately. It was not a coincidence I found a scrap of prophecy that happened to be exactly what we needed to live another day.”

Crowley’s pupils narrowed to thin lines. “I, you, wh—gh? Can you even hear yourself right now? You think—? Come on, after all of this, you really think She— ?”

The room had slowly begun to move again. Crowley’s miracle was wearing off.

“How can you be so sure?” he finally asked.

“Crowley, listen to me,” Aziraphale said lowly. “I honestly cannot say I know what they will do. Your guesses are as good as mine. But I know Heaven, and I am not stupid. They don’t believe the failure of the Great Plan was a part of the Ineffable Plan. They’re searching for someone to blame, and, well, I’m a prime candidate.”

“Then they should take me too!” Crowley said indignantly. “I’d rather be trapped in Heaven with you than be on an Earth without you.” Aziraphale’s cheeks grew faintly warm at the intensity and genuinity of that statement, but he had to focus right now. He shoved the tidal wave of adoration towards Crowley as hard as he could and hoped he would feel it.

The sway of Sandalphon’s coat has reached its apex and was now falling the other way.

“The feeling is mutual,” he said honestly. “Heaven does not care for Earth as much as they do about the War. But they do care about what will happen to Earth if Hell is given free-range. They won’t leave you alone. If—when—they take me, they’ll send another angel in my place.”

Crowley made a disgusted sound.

“Heaven does not appreciate the wonderful stories and intricacies of this place; I believe it is why they were so eager for the end of the world. And if they do send another in my place, it is under the assumption they can use any stuffy old angel to replace me. That anyone can appreciate humanity as I do. Crowley— you need to prove them wrong. ”

Crowley was always a particularly cunning demon. His distressed face went through a complicated series of emotions before ending on a positively, if slightly wobbly, serpentine grin. “And how should I do that, angel?” he purred.

The completely random thought of kissing Crowley dramatically before the miracle ended flirted intensely with Aziraphale. Startled, Aziraphale found himself leaning in to growl, “Give them hell, darling,” and then the miracle’s lifespan was up.

Sandalphon looked incredibly displeased.

“You’re only delaying the inevitable,” he said snidely.

“I delayed the ineffable,” Aziraphale corrected. Sandalphon narrowed his eyes. “Well? Go on, then. List my charges.”

Sandalphon tapped his foot on the ground and the pages went flying back into his outstretched fingers. “It is with these words that I charge thee, Principality Aziraphale, Angel of the First Order of the Lowest Hierarchy, Guardian of the Eastern Gate…”

Aziraphale stopped paying attention as the list of his crimes ( crimes, he thought with a mental eyeroll, this was ridiculous) was read. He nudged Crowley, and hoped the brief contact was enough to convey, I’ll be okay, we’ll be okay, I promise I’ll come back. I won’t leave you behind.

“I still hate this,” murmured Crowley, low enough to go unnoticed by Sandalphon.

Aziraphale gnawed his cheek—a nervous habit gained after reading the phrase from a book and trying to figure out what it meant. “It is not ideal,” he said back just as quietly. He smiled tightly when Sandalphon glanced at him. “But I believe it won’t be long,” he continued. “I’ll be back before you know it. Two shakes of a lamb’s tail.”

“...two thousand, seven hundred, and thirty-three accounts of gluttony…”

“Yeesh. You’d get a commendation from Hell for that one.”

“Hush, you.”

Finally, after what felt like a day's worth of monotonous droning, Sandalphon lowered the papers. “Given this evidence, Heaven no longer sees you fit to be the angelic representative of Earth. You will be recalled to Heaven until given further notice, and during this time, Heaven will proceed with any necessary actions. Do you have any questions?”

Aziraphale made a show of looking cowed. “May I say goodbye?”

“To who? The demon?”

“Humans question things when a regularity in their life vanishes without imaginable reason.”

Sandalphon nodded after a very obvious hesitation. “You have one hour.”

And he vanished in a great crackle of lightning. Aziraphale slouched, unaware of how tightly he’d been holding himself up. Crowley squeezed his tense shoulder.

“I should get going,” said Aziraphale. “Clock’s ticking. Will you mind the bookshop for me while I’m gone?”

“‘Course.”

“If anyone asks, I’m on a business trip.” Crowley nodded, a pinched expression crossing his face. “What is it, Crowley?”

He didn’t answer for a pronounced moment. “Just—Don’t do anything stupid, angel.”

“I’ll miss you too, my dear.”

An hour later, after he had exhausted himself teleporting around London hastily explaining his absence to the restaurants he frequented, his manicurist, the bakeries, making phone calls, and leaving voicemails for would-be buyers of his books, Aziraphale was gone.

#good omens #good omens fanfic #aziraphale #crowley #sandalphon #gehd #my writing #drinking #drinking tw

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smoochews · 6 years

Note

what are your favorite writers and your top favorite works from them?? like a top ten

I saw this ask in the middle of work and I wanted to scream aksldfjalks I’m gonna tell you rn that I got really overwhelmed with the amount of authors that have earned a spot in my top favs that I actually cut this to just the authors that I have most recently visited (this counts as returning multiple times to reread a certain fic… which happens… a lot)

@arckook Ria is one of the first authors I ever read from for k-pop fanfiction. Until Ria, I was just highkey on that Haikyuu volleyball gays/imagines and I’d like to believe that she was one of the main reasons why I began to invest myself heavily into the kpop fandom. I’m always amazed with each piece she releases. Her style is so unique and hypnotizing. There’s a big section in my heart reserved just for Ria that I don’t have enough words to convey. plz support. plz love. she’s the best

- To The Stars (Jungkook, BTS): Zombie Apocalypse AU, Enemies to Lovers AU, series, violence, angst, drama

This read is not for the light hearted. You have been warned. You will sob hysterically. You will feel rage seep into your bones. You will punch a hole in your screen. MC is an entire badass, but so broken and vulnerable; somehow she manages to keep herself together and carry on. Even when she hates Jungkook with every cell in her body, she makes sure to keep him alive, watch his six, just as he does for her. There’s only a handful of works that have kept me as heavily invested and on my toes every step of the way. And that list begins with To The Stars

@brokeandjetlagged I cannot tell you how many times I’ve made a fool out of myself in public while reading Bailey’s work…. like lord help me I can’t stay in my chair…

- We Take A Shot (Baekhyun, EXO): Office AU, boss!Baekhyun, one-shot, fluff

Even after re-reading it 2-3 times, I cannot help the obnoxious laughter escaping my mouth….sounding something along the lines of a screeching seagull. Dorky Baekhyun trying to be Mr. Businessman really killed me. LIKE PLZ THE HOVER BOARD asdfjsj I’m laughing just thinking about it

- Hurt Me, Heal Me (Yixing, EXO): Hospital AU, nurse!Yixing, one-shot, fluff

Honestly, I would pay to be Baekhyun in that moment. Someone kick me in the face if that meant I could spend some time with nurse Yixing. He’s so adorable and I highly relate to MC being a mess when he thinks that she’s Baek’s girlfriend. Overall, this fic makes my heart go kyuu~

- Bromance .2 (Minseok, EXO) : College AU, frat!Minseok, enemies to lovers AU, series (ish), fluff, smut, drama

enemies to lovers…. honestly I’m not entirely sure of what to say other than that you should read it

@sehun-smut ngl. one of the reasons, besides me passing out, that this rec list took so long to make is bc I stopped to re-read both of these fics…. no ragrats… I don’t think you’ll understand until you read all of their work… so like… you know what to do…

- Business in the Front (Baekhyun,EXO): Restaurant AU (ish), one-shot, smut

Older Baekhyun is a kink okay. I’ve never wanted to call someone daddy more in my life than while reading this fic… and like to begin with it’s hard for me to imagine Baek being zaddy, so that should say A LOT.

- Deceitful (Chanyeol, EXO) - Mafia AU, series, smut, violence

I think this is the first honeytrapper fic I’ve ever read in my life. I mean I was aware of the job description but not the actual title. I must say I’m thoroughly aroused and equally terrified.

@exhoe-imagines I really adore Ruby and Jewels. Like, they’re so funny and interactive with their followers; and their content is always breath taking. highkey power couple energy

- Can’t Hold Back (Jongdae, EXO): Enemies to Lovers AU, one-shot, smut, drama, slight angst

You already know Jongdae is fucked the minute he sees MC’s bathing suit on the ground while she’s in the pool. You already know that when he went home that evening, his meat was begging for mercy by the end of the night. jfladskjf okay I’m gross, I know, but carrying on– the growth between Jongdae’s and MCs relationship is really heartwarming. Could not have asked for more from this fic

- Lucky (Baekhyun + Chanyeol, EXO): College AU, one-shot, smut

So…. let’s talk about the elephant in the room… or should we say two? bc there is definitely more than one trunk for MC to handle… so…. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GET WREKT MC

@yehet-me-up I will never not be in love with Sarah. Her Exodus Mall series really takes me back home. Often times when I’m feeling down and sick, I return to Sarah’s page and re-read that series. To say the least, I find home in Sarah’s writing.

- The Problem With Wanting (Kyungsoo, EXO): Mall AU, series, fluff, slight angst, smut

listen to this song and just take it in…. I think this was the first fic I read from the Exodus series and it will always hold a special place in my heart. This fic in particular is what I find myself coming back to again and again, time after time, and I always feel renewed. I feel youthful. More like… you know that feeling you get when you realize you’re falling in love with someone? That’s this. Please read. Please.

- Disqualified (Kyungsoo, EXO): Friends to Lovers AU, one-shot, angst, fluff

Imagine twisting a knife in your gut and slowly removing it through the opposite side of your body. That’s this fic. But like. With love. askdjflksjd I really love the way Sarah portrays Kyungsoo. Her descriptions of his thoughts, mannerisms and quirks make me feel like I’m watching a movie. Everything is so distinct and the atmosphere feels tangible. idk words. I just love Sarah.

@snakescript I don’t know too much about this author but I’m totally and completely enamored with their writings.

- Make The Devil Cry (Taeyong, NCT) : College AU, one-shot, light angst, smut

I’m weak for the “playboy” tamer… and tbh I feel like this would be Taeyong irl. Hard and complex to the eyes of an observer, but a major softy and sweet pea to the eyes of a listener. I’m upset of how little attention this fic has bc the world is really missing out on a diamond.

- Face Like Thunder (Chanyeol, EXO): Mythology/Greek God AU, one-shot, light angst, fluff

I would like to file a complaint. My heart is crying and my love for Chanyeol is soaring and I’m ACHE FOR THE MAN. Lmao I’m not even a Chanyeol stan but this fic got me thinkin’

@johobi you can always count on Jo to make you cream your pants in the middle of Target (stay away from the baby section kids)

- Bloom / Snared (Yoonji/Yoongi, BTS): Mafia AU, smut

honestly, Yoonji can wipe the floor with my body, in pool of my own blood, and I would thank her. I really really love the way Jo depicts Yoonji here. I can just feel that fem fetal power and that in itself got me ruining my underwear.

- Tooth and Claw (Jungkook, BTS) : Werewolf AU, smut

I’ve never related to furry more in my life than while I read this fic. high key wanna be rawed and torn in half by his king kong schlong … idk how MC survived, but she’s my idol.

- Dig Deep + Interval (Yoongi, BTS): Space AU, smut

I’m ngl. I really went to Pornhub and looked up tentacle porn after reading this. Y’all can @ me, roast me if you like,,,, but you’re a got-damn liar if you say this doesn’t get your blood pumping. p sure I wrote this on my tags but i didn’t even know I liked tentacle porn until then…. I hate myself

@bread-jinie idk where to start…. there are so many things I can say about Kat…… im tongue-tied….

- Wings (Chanyeol, EXO): Friends to Lovers AU, angst, fluff

I think this fic is my favorite work Kat has written so far. It’s like she knows the right words to tug the strings of my heart and play me like a puppet. A heartbroken but hopeful puppet. MC and Chanyeol always looking at each other but never at the same time breaks me; thankfully, the ending patches me back together.

Honorable mentions bc I’ve grown v tired and cannot continue with full details for info regarding everything, in addition to the fact that I’m inpatient and I want to post this ASAP:

@kollectionn GOD SENT. DO NOT PLAY AROUND. YOUR LIFE WILL CHANGE. YOU WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. THE WORLD WILL END AS YOU KNOW IT. THEN BE REBORN FROM THE ASHES AS C WILLS IT SO. (sorry for the all caps but I feel INTENSELY about C and her works of art; If I can recall correctly, I believe she said that she would begin to write her own non-fanfic when she finds the time. I think she has the power and ability to write best selling novels that would leave J.K. Rowling quaking in her boots. Plz go and love C. Don’t ask for updates. Just show her all the love she deserves and more; I haven’t been lately and I feel terrible for it; I hope she knows I love her!!!)

@dropsofletters lemme tell you somm’… this author is so talented and diverse in her work that I find myself scattered with the amounts of fandom’s she holds in her clutch. I’m so thankful to have found her page on this godforsaken website bc she caters so much to this world. Talented. Spectacular. Amazing. Blessing to Society. I don’t think I’ve found any multi-fandom writers that has spread out as far as she has. She’s one of those authors that has exactly what you’re looking for, even if you don’t know what it is. An Angel.

@layhyunnie beautiful. ethereal. whimsical. Inspiring. I mean literally inspiring. I wrote a few drabbles after reading Guardian bc I wanted to try and bring to life a world outside of our own, to step outside reality, just like I felt while reading their work.

- Guardian (Yixing, EXO): Supernatural AU, series, fluff

Again… I’m v tired… so here’s a short list of authors I meant to add here, along with their fics/full details of why I love them:

@knockknocksoosthere / @underthejoon @marshmallow-phd @kpopfanfictrash @yeolology @yeolology @whimsical-ness @remembeo @lofiexo @nochugguk @noona-clock @noonachronicles @oilblotter @soobadnoonecanstopher

((If you would like to know more about my interests in the unfinished authors, or any authors above for that matter, then please leave me an ask!! I will answer them when I am no longer tired akjsjdf I cannot reply via chat as this is only a side blog))

#i hate u anon #did u really wanna kill me #jk sjfdsdjf #i cant hate u #i hope you like it ;;#also at all the authors i've reblogged from... you are my favorite.... im just v tired and only have 2 brain cells left #paep speaks #asks #anon #exo #bts #exo fic recs #bts fic recs

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maknaesdancersrappers · 6 years

Text

Warm (14/16)

prologue

cotton, wind, blow, blouse.

hair, flower, aroma, scent.

cold, eyes, ice, dive.

touch, warm, melt, lips.

a/n: i cried writing this one

You’ve noticed ever since your 7th anniversary, Taeyong has been distant and jittery around you. It started with him blankly staring at you when you would tell him about your day and it would take a few calls of his name for him to snap out of it. Next, he would always come home late, either from working overtime or hanging out with Johnny ever since he moved back to Seoul from Chicago.

When you consulted your best friend, she said it might be the infamous ‘7-year itch’ that happens between couples; when the relationship starts to recede. You argued that it can’t be because he’s always just as passionate and enthusiastic when you two would fool around in bed.

“Well, maybe he just wants sex. You two are still unbelievably celibate.” She scoffs and under her breath she grumbles, “I still think his pepper is an inch.”

You scold her when you caught what she said, shoving her shoulder.

“Then he’s probably cheating on you! Like, are you sure he’s really working overtime or meeting Johnny?”

You frown at her suggestion, “It’s not like him to lie.”

“Remember that little incident with what’s-her-face and wanting to have him ‘study each other’s anatomy’ back in senior high?”

That left an unsettling feeling in the pit of your stomach and it stayed there until you got back home where Taeyong was browsing through the usual stack of papers he brings home from work in the living room.

He looks up from the file he was holding, his eyes a little red and the bags under them were darker than usual. “Oh, hey.” He briefly stands up to kiss your cheek before plopping back down on the couch. “Have you eaten? I made some beef stew.”

“I’m still full… Aren’t you going to bed yet?”

“I will in a while. I’ll just sort these out.”

You nod and get ready for bed, trying to forget the suggestions your best friend had mentioned earlier.

Taeyong clambers onto the bed just a few minutes after you settle in and as he was about to scoop you into his arms and warm you up from the cold airconditioning, his phone rings. He mumbles an apology when he sees your dismayed expression before getting up and answering his phone.

“Why are you calling? Ya! I’m thinking it through, wait, I’m in the same room as her.” He says into his phone in a hushed tone, thinking you didn’t hear him as he slips out the room.

Your chest tightens, thinking what through? And why did it matter that you were in the room.

“Maybe he’s cheating on you.” Your friend’s words echo in your head.

You fell asleep before Taeyong came back to bed and when you woke up the next morning, he was gone already. He left a note by the breakfast he made you, telling you he had to go work early, and you can tell he was in a rush because of his handwriting.

As you dusted your face with setting powder, your gaze lands on the small jewelry box Taeyong had gotten you for your birthday 2 years ago. You haven’t been wearing any of your jewelry since you only used them for night outs or formal events, but today you felt like wearing at least one of them. Upon opening the navy faux leather box, it was a mess of tangled chains of necklaces and bracelets on one side and neatly arranged rows of your earrings where rings are supposed to be. You see the rose pendant he had gotten you before and untangle it from the others. On the leaves, it had his initials and since you felt so distant with him the past weeks, you decided to wear it.

But it had still bothered you all morning about Taeyong’s actions and your friend’s words still haunted the back of your mind. You hated it that it made sense in your head, but you refused to believe any of it. You were so out of it during work that your boss had advised you to take the rest of the day off.

You barely worked in the morning, yet the second you got to your apartment, fatigue started to set in. Without another thought, you open the door and toe off your shoes on the mat. You thought you were seeing things, but you see Taeyong’s loafers--the one he wears to work--on the mat, and what made you feel ten times worse were the black pumps beside it.

“Taeyong?!” You didn’t mean to actually screech, but when you hear more than one hurried footsteps inside the living room, you repeat yourself and stomp towards the noise.

“[Y/N]!” Taeyong awkwardly stands in the middle of the living room, hands behind his back and looking flustered. “W-what are you doing home so early? Are you sick? Are you okay?”

“Am I okay?” You scoff, “Are you okay? What are you doing home so early?”

“I, uh, forgot some papers.”

“Oh, did you?” He nods his head at your question. “Did you bring a co-worker with you, huh?”

His eyebrows furrowed together and as if a lightbulb went off in his head, his eyes widened. “Uhm, I--”

“Where is she?” You demand as you looked around the room. When you feel his hand on your shoulder, you push him off and glare at him with wet eyes. “Are you cheating on me?”

“No! You know I would never even think of that!”

“Then whose heels are on the mat?”

“Miyoung’s!”

You and Taeyong had never screamed at each other like this.

“Who the hell is that?!”

“Johnny’s girlfriend!”

And as if on cue, the front door shuts and Johnny’s voice booms, “Hey, Taeyong, the flower shop only had peach roses, [Y/N] is fine with that, right--oh…” He walks into view with a three large bouquets of the roses he was just talking about. “A-am I late?”

On the corner of your vision, you see Taeyong shake his head while covering his face with a hand.

“Late for what?” You asked, calming down a bit.

Suddenly, a girl runs out from the laundry room and went straight for Johnny. She looks at you with a tight smile. “Hi, uhm, I wish we met on better circumstances, but I think it’s best that Johnny and I leave. Let’s go, hun.”

“Wait, what’s happening?” Johnny looks at her and back at Taeyong, but she hushes him.

“Hush, Taeyong can handle this.” She says, glancing at him and gives him a thumbs up, mouthing “You got this.”

When they left, you turn to Taeyong and wait for him to explain.

“Uhm, do you want to sit down first?”

“No, I’m good standing up.”

He sighs, “Okay. Uhm…” His eyes fall on your neck, making him reach out and touch the necklace you wore. “You haven’t worn this in a while.”

“Don’t change the topic. What the hell is happening?” You snap at him and he offers you an apologetic smile.

“When I bought this, the store also had these rings; really expensive rings. And I knew I didn’t have the money to buy them so I didn’t think much of it until I saw this one particular ring. I immediately thought of you and I don’t know why I did, but when the lady who sold me this necklace offered to reserve the ring for at most 3 months, I took it.” He pauses to swallow. “After I gave you this necklace, I started working different part time jobs so I can save up for the ring. I didn’t even have enough when the 3 months were up, but my mom lent me the money because she knows how much I wanted it for you-- how much I love you.”

Taeyong pulls out a square box from his back pocket and you recognize the packaging as the same one that came with the necklace from years ago. “So I’ve had this for 4 years because I didn’t know when to give it you; I kept waiting for the right time, and if you came home a little later, I could have given it to you like I planned.”

You stare up at him, “But, we already celebrated our anniversary… w-what’s with today that you have to ask Johnny and his girlfriend for help?”

He inhales deeply, closing his eyes as he slowly exhales. With one last breath, he gets on one knee and holds your hand, gazing into your eyes.

“I swear to God, I had a whole spiel to tell you, but you came too early and now I can’t remember most of it.” He chuckles, “And I feel like I should apologize for taking so long to do this, but [Y/N], you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You’re patient and understanding with me, you know how to put up with me, and I’m--I’m me because of you. I loved you for 7 years and I promise to love you even more for the next years to come,” He opens up the square box and reveals the most elegant ring you’ve ever seen. “Will you marry me?”

You don’t even realize that you had held your breath or that you’ve began crying until you attempted to answer him. “Wait, I just feel so stupid for thinking that you were cheating on me.”

He shushes, vehemently shaking his head. “No, no, it’s okay. Please answer me, baby. One word, yes or no. And whatever it is, I’ll accept it.”

You choke back your tears at the thought of him understanding if you reject his proposal, “Of course, it’s a yes!” You pull him up from the floor and throw your arms around his shoulders.

He hugs you back, wrapping his arms around your waist and you feel it: the warmth of his body that you missed so much; the warmth that made you feel that you were home.

“Is this really happening?”

He laughs, breaking the hug off to put the ring on your finger. “Why? Are you having second thoughts?”

“No!” You cry, briefly admiring the ring before returning your attention on Taeyong, who wipes your tears with his thumb, “Never.”

a/n: i will always cry while writing marriage proposals bc its the only time i allow myself to be so cheesy and im so soft rn it didnt help that taeyong had apple hair for inkigayo :c

this is still open (u kno if anyone else is interested in getting to know me)

follow me on twitter? @ohyesjaehyun

#nct #nct u #nct 127 #nct 2018 #nct scenarios #taeyong scenarios

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zillanewt · 6 years

Text

Merc With A Trashmouth

Chapter One // Chapter Two // Chapter Three // Chapter Four

summary: Despite growing up in Derry together, the two boys went down two very different paths. Richie is the world’s most notorious mercenary and assassin, while Eddie is none other than New York’s sweetheart - the literal poster boy for bringing justice to baddies without unaliving them. This is the self-indulgent spideypool!reddie au that literally nobody asked for.

pairing: reddie

words: 1.2K

warnings: gratuitous cussing (bc this is deadpool!richie ofc), non-graphic violence (again, deadpool au), mentions of child abuse (it’s only one or two lines)

A/N: wow so idk if ive ever told yall, but im such a huge marvel fanboy and this is a fucking pleasure to write. ok so Richie’s backstory on how he became a mercenary is very vague for a reason, because nobody is actually sure of Deadpool’s backstory in canon, soooo. There’s also quite a bit of fourth wall breaking because Deadpool. I feel like this kinda sucks and is a little underdeveloped, so please let me know what you think! Please message me if you would like to be added to the taglist!

Kids who left Derry were fucking strange. But that wasn’t saying much when those who stayed were either absorbed into the evil cogwork of the town’s sinister behaviors or abducted by a demonic sewer clown.

Though, none of these things truly mattered to Richie Tozier.

He supposes he would’ve been strange even if his parents hadn’t even birth to him in that shithole town. Besides, he’s 95% sure all that Pennywise shit happened in another universe, so it’s not like anybody would know what the fuck he’s talking about if he brought it up.

Still, you had to be a special kind of fucked up to be sitting masked in a Toronto bar while a man offers you money to kill another man.

“There are important business transactions happening here, so you won’t get my tragic backstory quite yet, sweetheart.”

The man sitting across from Richie looks confused, yet unsurprised that the mercenary is speaking to thin air. There are always whisperings about how crazy the man is, so nobody expects him to be any less than completely psychotic. If you walked away from a conversation with him without a bullet in any of your limbs, it could be considered a complete success.

“We have an offer for you,” the man said in a low voice, sliding a manila folder across the table. “High-pay target. We suspect him to be Spider-Man. He has been interfering with our drug rings in New York.”

The second Richie opened the file, his heart was hit with a pang of worry, then a wave of rage. In small black typed letters was “Eddie Kaspbrak,” then stamped over in a bright bold red were the words “TERMINATE.” There’s going to be hell to pay for whoever thought this would be a funny April Fools joke to pull on him.

“No,” he growled, tossing the file back onto the table. “He’s from Derry. This guy couldn’t even complete a lap in gym class. What in the fuck makes you think he could possibly Spider-Man?!”

The man instantly shrinks back from Richie’s yelling, slightly in fear for his life.

“People change, Tozier,” the man reasons, then chooses to go for the low blow. “You did, didn’t you?”

Every patron in the bar eavesdropping knew the comment was a mistake and so did the man, as regret instantly washed over him and his face paled. He took those few quiet seconds to silently say goodbye to his limbs.

“Get out,” he mumbled very quietly, almost like a hurt teenager.

“What?”

“Get out!!” he yelled at full volume now, not holding anything back. Sure, he killed people for a living, but damn...he still had feelings.

The man quickly gathered his belongings, sweeping Eddie’s file into his arms. His breathing stopped when Richie placed a crushing grip on his arm.

“Leave Kaspbrak’s file with me,” Richie demanded, determining the amount of pressure it would take to break this guy’s arm.

“I can’t do that Mr. Tozier! My boss will kill me,” the man said panicked but gave in when Richie began applying said pressure. “Ow! Ow! Ok! Ok! Take it! Just please don’t hurt me!”

As soon as he handled the file over, Richie let go, but he wasn’t quite satisfied yet. Before the frightened man could run away, he whipped out his gun.

“One more thing, Mrrr…” Richie said very calmly, a complete contradiction to his behavior only seconds ago.

“Reynolds,” the man whimpered, not taking his eyes off the gun in Richie’s hands.

“Mr. Reynolds,” Richie began, putting the barrel of the gun against the man’s forehead, in between the eyebrows. “You tell whoever the fuck you’re working for that nobody touches Eddie Kaspbrak or every single one in your filthy operation will become very familiar with my good friends here.” He gestures to his guns and the twin katanas strapped to his back.

“We Gucci?”

The man whimpers and nods, fleeing from the bar as soon as Richie puts his gun away.

“God,” Richie giggles, “they are so fun to scare.”

Sitting in this dirty bar, he realizes now he has Eddie’s information, but he’s not sure what to do with it. They haven’t talked in a good 10 years, and he’s not even sure Eddie would even care about him anymore.

It’s not like anybody really does.

But, some crazy part of him is screaming at him to find his childhood best friend and love.

“Uhhh no,” Richie says to no one in particular. “Eddie probably has a perfect life and family, and we kill people for a living.”

Would Eddie hate him if he knew who he grew up to be? Would he be disgusted? Would he find out what’s under this mask and be horrified?

It’s times like these he wishes he still had Stan to be his voice of reason. But then again, if that were reality, Richie wouldn’t be “the Merc with a Mouth.” He’d just be regular old “Trashmouth,” like he was when they were kids.

Constantly, he lays awake at night due to the pain and wonders whether his life would’ve been different if he didn’t move from Derry when he was 15. There was nothing Richie wanted to do more than stay with Eddie, but his father was relocated Canada. Though, that sounds like a relatively safe place to be, right?

It should’ve been, but his parents just would never stop fighting. It wasn’t that bad back in Derry, but the move put too much stress on them and they all snapped in their own ways. Mrs. Tozier yelled at her husband and son whenever she got drunk (which was quite often). Richie’s dad decided to take his anger out on his “idiot son” and would throw Maggie’s empty bottles at him.

Richie?

Well, Richie was a teenager. There was nothing else to do, but fall in with the wrong people and turn to violence. The violence provided money, which was his ultimate independence from the disaster of the Tozier household.

Truthfully, he doesn’t remember much else, due to his state of mental health. All he knows is that he now owns a full arsenal and always has weapons strapped to him, like a fucking lunatic.

And to think, just ten years ago he and the Losers were spitting loogies at the quarry and telling ghosts stories about “Pennywise the Dancing Clown.” Richie was at least glad he didn’t exist in the universe where that stupid clown actually tortured and tormented them. He didn’t need any more problems.

Carefully, he opened the file and looked at the picture of Eddie. This is him at 25, and he’s just as amazing as he was when they were kids. His skin is sun-kissed like it always was when they were younger. He still has all those freckles on his face. There’s a woman with him in the picture, probably his wife or girlfriend, kissing him on the cheek as he laughs.

Richie should be more bitter Eddie has all this - the beauty and a happy life - while Richie has literally nothing, but he just simply can’t be. He remembers how much Eddie struggled when they were kids, as his mother continually manipulated him and the Bowers gang constantly beat on him, but he was always kind to other people. If anybody deserves to be happy, it’s Eddie Kaspbrak.

And if Eddie really is Spider-Man, then Richie would truthfully be impressed and slightly aroused because he’s seen how tight that spandex is.

Maybe, it’s time to pay his old friend a visit….just to make sure no goons try to whack him off.

#wow this really sucks i could do better #im sorry yall #reddie #merc with a trashmouth #my fics

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mxn-yoongi · 7 years

Text

BTS as Kingsman (Seokjin)

-Literally a whole dad. Like super supportive of new trainees and then always becomes a mentor to the newest member. Hes kinda good at judging people

-Its gotten to the point where whenever they have a new batch of trainess he can basically guess whos in and whos going to be out. AND HES NEVER WRONG

-Like ‘ that one is too confident i think he’ll be out when we toss him out of a plane and make him work with the others. Next’

-‘That one just busted DOWN A DOOR WITH HIS SHOULDER FUCK YEAH KID YOURE IN’ (good job lancelot!!)

-Codename: Galahad

-Jin really likes being more of a tech guy instead of being in the field.

-Like yeah i can hack into the any security system and delete anything theyve got or obtain top secret government files without being detected on their system but dont ask me to punch a guy in his throat

-Like i will if i HAVE TO but ask lancelot first he’ll punch anyones throat so leave me here

-So basically one day arthur is like ‘hey galahad we kinda need you to hack into the United States Governments files’ and jin just

-‘Okay sure’

-So jin gets to it and hes typing at the speed of light and there are a bunch of numbers and letters on the screen and jins just chilling because of course hes got this in the bag hes done this like a hundred times

-And he finally pushes enter (dramatically might i add) because that always gets him right in and he turns in his swivel chair and hes like ‘what do you need arthur’

-But arthur is like ‘umm bro’ and hes pointing at the computer and jin turns around and HIS EYES ALMOST POP OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS

-He! Has! Been! Detected! And! Blocked! Out! Of! The! Archives! And! Databases!

-How did this happen@@@@@@@

-Jin just kind of gets this determined look in his face and suddenly hes typing faster than before (if thats even possible)

-‘Galahad whats going on?’

-‘Something is keeping me out but that should be impossible because...because...well just because i know what im doing and they shouldnt be able to trace anything back to me and what is going on’

-Jin is like working overtime on his computer like how does he type that fast how is he even reading the things that come up on screen if they disappear in .2 seconds what is this

-‘Okay okay no need to panic its probably just like a firewall or something’

-Jin stops everything and glares at arthur

-‘Are you kidding me? You think of all things a measly firewall will stop me. This sint a firewall.Its not even some bot system either because its too slow. This is like human speed blocking.’

-Suddenly jins screen goes completely black.

-Both men are confused bc umm whats going on

-A loading bar appears at the top of the screen and suddenly some kind of I.M. window pops up.

-Jin tries to click the x in the top right corner to close the window but nothing happens.

-Instead in the bottom left corner there are three dots and the words

-‘Y/N’ is typing…’

-The message that pops up leaves jin red in the face

-‘Is someone being a bad boy?’

-Arthur is laughing because ‘did your computer really get some kind of freaky virus from waching porn’

-‘I DONT DO THAT ON THIS ONE’

-‘I really need you…’

-Jin frantically pushes the x but it still doesnt work

-‘TO STOP TRYING TO HACK THE US GOVERNMENT’

-Both arthur and galahad stop what theyre doing umm this is a little too real

-‘Are you going to respond?’

-‘I know youre reading these’

-‘I can see you right now’

-There is literally no way you can see them because theyre in hq which is a mansion in the middle of nowhere

-Another window pops up on the screen and its jin like in real time and he realizes its the image from the camera on his computer and oh my gosh someone is hacking into the hackers computer what the heck

-‘This is a warning. Don’t try to hack the government again because I will find you. Have fun.’

-The screen goes black again and when it light up lo and behold its on A PORN SITE lol arthur is dying in the background bc galahad just got out hacked.

-Jin is still shocked by the fact that someone was capable of doing this to him. Like there is someone out there that can really get into their system despite jin taking every precaution and making it nearly impossible to hack

-Jin shuts off his computer and just kinda flops onto the ground because what the heck

-2 WEEKS LATER LETS TRY THIS AGAIN GALAHAD

-Sure enough jin still cant get into the database and the I.M. window pops up again

-‘I literally warned you’

-Jin kinda hesitates a little because should he respond or...

-‘How did you know it was the same person’

-‘I told you. I can see you’

-‘HOW’

-‘I dont hack and tell baby.’

-Jin is taken back?? Um baby? Hes no baby. Hes not your baby. Is he your baby?!?!?! Mom???????

-This goes on for like a while. Like jin tries to get into the files but hes always stopped by you and then you guys have a lil conversation and jin starts trying to hack more often just becuase…

-He wants to talk to you a little bit?

-Like he genuinely begins to worry about himself because does he like someone thats preventing him from doing his job? Have you become a part of his daily routine? Can he separate himself from you?? Its like a criminal falling in love with a cop basically.

-You also let your guard down a little bit like he already knows your name and birthday and about your dog. You dont tell anyone about your dog. Bc hes yours. Your! Dog! But this guy trying to hack into the US government knows about him what have you done.

-You decide its time for a break from this whole hacker blocking thing so you tell your boss and he assigns someone else to this case.

-Yeah its a case.

-The gov. has been trying to figure out who is getting into their files and you were put in charge but clearly its proving more difficult than you thought bc you have grown attached and if he gets caughts then you wont be able to talk to him anymore

-Youve figured out for the most part where he is located but you havent reported it to your boss because...because you cant…

-So now theyve got someone else trying to figure out what you already know

-The day you decide to take your break jin also decided he wants to talk to you and there he goes trying to hack again. He pushes anter and waits for the screen to go black like it has for the last few weeks.

-But it doesnt??

-Hes suddenly in the governments files…?

-Jin is kind of of worried like umm where is Y/N and why didnt she stop me from doing this.

-So jin has no idea what to do now because for the next week he keeps getting into the files and its like you disappeared from the internet and all of a sudden he gets an idea

-Like hes got these government files so if you work for the government they must have some information on you right???

-He searches your first name and a few different people pop up then he narrows it down to one by looking at the birthday and there you are in all your glory.

A picture of you that makes jin’s heart skip a few beats followed by

Name: L/N, F/N

Age: 24

Department: Cybersecurity

and right there...your address…

-Seokjin swallows hard before he scribbles the address down on a piece of paper.

-Hes out of his chair before he knows it and nobody has time to question him when he says hes going out into the field to gain some valuable information

-AND THATS HOW HE ENDS UP on an airplane to your location at 9 pm.

-One five hour flight and a one hour taxi drive later jin is standing outside what he assumes is your house at 3 in the morning

-He hesitantly knocks on the door and waits.

-You are woken up from your good night of sleep by a knock on the door and when you look at the time youre like umm who is here at 3 am and why, oh wait you think you know why

-You shuffle downstairs slowly

-You swallow hard and open the door. The person you see on the other side doesnt startle you bc oh my gosh this is the hacker man ive possible fallen in love with even though technically im supposed to be throwing him in jail oh my gosh

-And you deliberately let him find out your location in hopes that he’d show up but you didnt think he’d be here so soon

-Maybe this was a bad idea

-OH GOD HES HOTTER IN REAL LIFE. TRUE WORLDWIDE HANDSOME.

-Your mind is nearly blank but somehow you manage to play it cool

-‘I wasn’t expecting you so soon’

-Jin is ??????? you were expecting him???

-‘I didnt think you’d let your guard down long enough that i would figure out your address.’ jin plays it off cool with a little smirk that makes you want to pounce on him

-‘Oh baby...its so cute you think you could have actually found me.’

-Jin raises an eyebrow in confusion

-‘Don’t try to fool yourself. I let you find me.’ the way your bottom lip juts out slightly is enough to make jin lose it

-he is impossibly entranced by you bc not only can you out hack him but you also outsmart him and out-hot(?) him and everything in between.

-He literally cannot hold himself back he just kinda goes for it like a full on dizzying, heated, passionate, swollen lips and flushed faces type of kiss.

-And that is how you managed to get yourself a kingsman boyfriend.

A/N: Sorry if this one is a little bad its just kind of what comes out of my mind.

#kim seokjin x reader #kim seokjin x you #seokjin x reader #seokjin x you #bts x reader #bts kingsman au #bts #kim seokjin imagine #kim seokjin scenario #kim seokjin #kim seokjin fanfic #seokjin scenarios #seokjin imagine #seokjin fanfic #bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts fanfic

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