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#it's even harder to want to look at or respond to messages but!! I appreciate this.
sherewrytes · 18 days
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T. A. R (Time, Appreciation, Respect)
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(I'll always want you part 2)
Synopsis: Ony was calling Y/N constantly these days, trying to always reach out to talk and say his piece. Y/N wasn't sure if she was ready for it.
C.W. Angst, Black coded reader, Drug use (weed). Song links used as reference.
Fanfic inspired by the following song.
Solange: Cranes in the sky
Link for part one here
Time had passed since your confrontation with Ony on that fateful night. The sting of betrayal still lingered, casting a shadow over your every thought and action. You still find herself unable to shake the memories of everything that took place between you and Ony and the raw emotions it had unleashed.
It's 2:30 AM. You lie awake, replaying the conversation with Ony in your mind. A part of you acknowledges he may be right, yet you find it impossible to converse without being overwhelmed by emotions.
You heard Annie out on her part to play in all this but not Ony. You didn't have class until 2pm today so you had enough time to sleep some more if needed. You got out of bed, stretched, went to your desk to journal to clear your mind.
You lit the candle on your desk, opened your journal and poured your feelings into it. The pen felt heavy in your hand, similar to how your heart felt in your chest. You wrote about the confusion swirling within you, torn between the logic of Ony's words and the ache of betrayal that still lingered deep within your soul. Memories flashed through your mind of happier times, of sad times and every moment in between. You knew you should hear him out but, you couldn't decide if you were ready or not.
You closed the journal and texted Sasha to see if she was awake. You needed someone to talk to. Sasha responded almost immediately saying she's in the area, so she'd be over in a few and she has Connie and Eren with her.
You sighed and responded. You went to your kitchen to make a quick midnight snack for you and your quests. 15 mins later, at your apartment is Sasha, Connie and Eren.
Connie: "Is it okay if I smoke in here. Between Uni, my music shit and other shit. I'm stressed out."
You: "It's cool. I do smoke sometimes, well used to with Ony. Speaking of Ony. He's been calling my phone nonstop.
*Turns to Eren* He said you've been on his ass about me. Eren the fuck you on boy.
Eren sighed "Look I'm just looking out for him. Ony is taking this harder that I've seen him take anything. Him and I go way back. Ony only shows up to class, messages me for some weed well hella weed. He aint even in the studio much either."
You knew Eren, Connie, Mikasa and Ony were music majors at Paradis University which you all attended. Eren was the lowkey producer type that makes beats to rival the greats. Connie is a rising hip hop artist and Ony is a cross between Trap Soul and Rap. Mikasa was the soulful girl with a beautiful voice. You knew Ony never missed studio time for nothing, so you knew he was struggling.
"When last did he show up." Y/N asked Eren with some concern in her tone.
"Probably 2 months ago before that it was 3 months before that. Look you don't have to force yourself to talk to him or bear his wounds or help him heal from the mess he made on his own. It ain't your job to, What I'm asking is if you can hear him out even if its 5 minutes if you can't then Imma tell him to drop it."
You sat in silence for a bit truly wondering what to do, so you turned to Sasha. "Honestly I want to hear him out, I do but I need more time. I know everyone thinks I forgave Annie so easy, but Ony and I had something deeper than Annie and I had even with our years of friendship. Ya we were fighting and at odds that time but..I know I'm being dumb cause Annie is just as responsible as he was. I just need to clear my head some more."
Connie took a toke of his joint and passed it to Eren then Eren to Sasha. Sasha pulled out her phone and connected it to the speakers in your apartment and started playing L.E.S by Childish Gambino. They all passed the joint around the room you took a few hits here and there. Eren was mindlessly scrolling through his IG to see Ony posted a 15 sec video on IG with a link in the caption to his YouTube to his latest track Amphetamine.
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Eren blurted out with a bit of shock, "What the fuck, Ony just dropped a new song. It looks like he changed his artist's name from Ony to Soro. I mean he mentioned the change last time he came in the studio. Yo Sasha disconnect real quick lemme listen to this real quick."
Sasha disconnected her phone to allow Eren to pull up the track. " The song is almost 8 mins WTF is Ony on" Eren says.
The beat kicks in with this smooth, laid-back vibe that immediately hooks you in. Everyone's silent giving the track a listen.
" It's like an amphetamine, how it marinate on my mind (stuck on me, yah) Got no doubt I'll be alright, if I just make it through the night."
You can hear, almost feel the range of emotions in the song. You can hear Ony's voice pouring out his feelings. The beat changes around 2:48 seconds in giving a whole different vibe to the song.
"Shawty cold as December, I still fold her, no Manila B-b-b-brr wit me baby, I hibernate, smoke the lettuce."
Everyone was vibing with the song until they heard Mikasa's voice drop on the track around 4:28 Everyone a bit surprised since Mikasa doesn't easily do features even if it's with her friends. Connie laughed a bit "He got Mikasa on this with him. Damn he really went all out. Aye Eren aint this the same beat he said he didn't want around 5 maybe 6 months ago?" Eren laughed thinking back to when he played this beat for Ony, and he said he hated it. Ony owed him big time for this, but he'll circle back to it. As the song finished. You sat with your eyes full of tears. You thought to yourself that you could feel every emotion Ony sang about in the song. The loss of their relationship, his struggles with his mental health and so much more.
Connie was the first the chime in when the song ended "Damn that was.... deep." "Yah it was Ony really flipped the script on this one." Eren chimed in.
Eren got a notification that Ony was live on IG. He clicked on it. He saw he was talking about his just dropped song and other usual shit that's going on in his life.
Ony's eyes were the newfound usual shade of slight bloodshot red from smoking and hardly any sleep. He was reading off a comment asking him who inspired him to write the song. he responded with "Someone but also no one."
Ony's voice flowed through the speakers in your apartment causing Eren to disconnect his phone to watch the live a bit easier.
He commented saying "Fire track man, wish you'd let me know you were droppin a song man."
Ony read the comment out loud and smirked and said "Sorry man. I wanted it to be a personal project, but I owe you one big time for the beat."
Ony and Eren were engaging in their usual banter in the comments of Ony's Instagram live. You were deep in thought when Ony read aloud a comment from someone claiming his song was inspired by his ex-girlfriend. Ony and you had a semi-public relationship, which is due to his rising fame as a Trap Soul/rap artist.
Ony sighed, his mind drifting back to the last time he saw you in person, when you came to return his belongings from your place. He had seen you around campus since then, but it simply wasn't the same. His response was "It was inspired by pain. Pain of loss, loss of love, loss of hopes, loss of dreams. Loss of self. She's part of something I lost in my life."
Ony paused, his gaze drifting off as he recalled the bittersweet memories. He took a deep breath, trying to push away the ache in his chest as he continued, his voice laden with emotion. "So yeah, she's part of what I lost, but 'Amphetamine' is also about finding myself again. It's about reclaiming my voice, my truth, and pouring it all out into my music."
A faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips, though sadness lingered in his eyes. "Maybe one day she'll hear this song and understand. Understand that she's not just a memory, but a muse who ignited something within me, something I'll carry with me forever."
With that, Ony concluded, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air. The live disconnected indicating he ended it abruptly.
As the live session ends abruptly, the room falls into a heavy silence. You, sits with a mix of emotions swirling within yourself. Ony's words echo in your mind, resonating deeply with your own conflicted feelings. You can't shake the sense of nostalgia and longing that his music and words evoke. Sasha breaks the silence, her voice soft yet determined. "Y/N, are you okay?" she asks, her concern evident.
You took a moment to collect your thoughts before responding. "I don't know, Sasha," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
Sasha nods understandingly, her eyes reflecting empathy. "I get it. It's hard to hear someone express their pain so openly, especially when it's intertwined with your own." Eren chimes in, his tone reflective. "Yeah, but maybe that's what he needs right now. It's better than him bottling it up and tryna smoke it all away."
Connie exhales a puff of smoke, his expression contemplative. "True, but it's also a lot to unpack. Y/N, you don't have to rush into anything. Take your time to process everything, to figure out what you need and want. What Ony did was messed up"
You nod, grateful for your friends' support. "Thanks, guys. I think…I think I need some time alone to sort through my thoughts."
With that que, Eren, Sasha and Connie left your apartment. you walk through your apartment heading to your room, the melody of Ony's song still echoing in your mind. Your emotions even more confusing than when you talked to Ony earlier. You looked at the time. It was almost 5 am. You decided to shower and head back to bed, hoping to get some rest before class.
Your mind was restless, torn between Ony's latest track and his words during the IG live, you were conflicted. On one hand, you acknowledged missing him, but on the other, infidelity was something you could never condone in a relationship. You recognized a desire to listen to his explanation, yet you feared your heart might not endure his version of the events.
The weight of Ony's words hangs heavy in the air, suffocating your mind with intense thoughts. Alone amidst the dim glow of your bedside lamp, the words "Maybe one day she'll hear this song and understand." taunt you with the possibility of reconciliation and closure. You thought to yourself "How could I ever hope to understand the depths of his pain when my own wounds still bleed with the memory of his betrayal?"
Finally entering your room, you sink onto the edge of the bed, burying your face in trembling hands, desperate to silence the cacophony of thoughts threatening to consume you.
"Take your time to process everything, to figure out what you need and want." Connie's words echo faintly in her mind. With a trembling sigh, you rise from the bed, your steps faltering as you make your way to the bathroom. The steady stream of water cascades over your trembling form, washing away the tears that stain your cheeks.
"It's 5 am. I should try to get some rest before class," you think to yourself. Climbing out of the shower, your limbs feel heavy. Wrapping yourself in a towel, the fabric offers a feeble shield against the lingering chill. You dress slowly, abandoning your usual routine for the simple comfort of bed, seeking to calm your mind. Eventually, you drift into sleep, the confusion in your heart, perhaps even greater than before.
*Slight Time Skip*
You finished up her class for the evening, your Textile Science class drained your mind. you run into Eren, Connie, Armin and Pieck in the courtyard chattin it up.
"Yo, Y/N!" Armin hollered, his grin wide as he motioned for her to come over. You gave a small nod, casually strolling over as they kept chattin'. It helped take your mind off things for a sec.
"So, y'all ready for tonight?" Armin asked, his eyes sparklin' with excitement. "Tonight?" you echoed, feeling a bit lost.
Armin leaned in closer, speakin' low like it was a secret. "The party, It's goin' down at my place. everybody's rolling through." You thought about if Ony was gonna be there since going Armin's parties was one of their go to things as a couple.
You shifted uncomfortably, tryna come up with an excuse to bail but before you could say anythin', Sasha and Mikasa slid through, bringin' a burst of energy to the scene. "Hey, y'all!" Sasha greeted; her smile infectious as she pulled you into a hug.
Mikasa gave a nod, her expression serious as she peeped Y/N with concern.
"Y/N, you gotta come through tonight," Pieck chimed in, her voice smooth and persuasive. "You never show up to the parties, and it's gonna be lit." Y/N hesitated, caught between the comfort of being alone and the fear of missing out on the squad's vibe.
Just then, Ony strolled past, casting a shadow over Y/N's mood. She felt a surge of anger bubbling up inside, memories of their messy situation flooding back.
Armin, clueless as ever, turned to Ony with a hopeful grin. "Yo, you coming tonight, Ony?"
Ony glanced at you for a sec before turning back to Armin, his face unreadable. But before he could answer, you spoke up with fire in your voice. "I ain't showing if he's gonna be there," you stated, pointing your finger at Ony with a fierce look.
The air got heavy; the tension thick enough to cut with a knife. Y/N's heart raced as she waited for Ony's response. But instead of coming back at you, Ony just nodded quietly, his eyes holding a hint of regret before he dipped out.
You caught the concerned glances of your friends. You knew your emotions were a bit confusing being torn between wanting to hear him out, missing him then not wanting to be around him. Even though almost much time had passed, her emotions still felt raw.
You looked around to your friend group who was gauging your reaction to seeing Ony. Each stare, felt like a trap a push to make a decision you weren't ready for.
"I can't do this," you muttered, your voice barely above a whisper as you took a step back, your eyes darting between your friends and a mental escape route. Sasha's hand on your arm stopped you in your tracks, her grip firm yet gentle. "You can't run from this forever, Y/N, you're gonna have to address this or find the will to move on" she said softly, her eyes reflecting a depth of understanding. You stared at Sasha's face trying to gauge her facial expression and reaction "I know, Sash I know." you whispered hoarsely, your voice cracking with emotion. "But I'm not ready to face him, not yet. I don't know if I ever will be."
With that said you turned and left them there, briskly walking back to catch an uber back to your apartment.
----------------------------While you left-----------------------------------
Eren stared at Armin, scoffing with annoyance "Bro, how you gonna forget they ain't together no more? Ony straight up did her dirty with Annie."
Armin sighed and took a step back. "I know but they're both my friends and I want them both to be happy and come out more. guess I messed up by asking them out around each other. It's just that we hardly get to chill with both of them around, you know...it's tough."
Eren shook his head, his frustration evident in his furrowed brow. "I get that, Armin, but you gotta realize it's not just about them being happy. Ony really hurt Y/N, man. And seeing him around just brings back all that pain."
Armin's shoulders slumped in defeat, his expression reflecting the weight of his guilt. "I know, Eren, I know," he muttered, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I just... I don't know how to fix this mess."
Sasha, who had been listening quietly, spoke up with a sympathetic tone. "Maybe there's no quick fix, Armin. Sometimes all we can do is give them space and time to heal, you know?"
Connie nodded in agreement, his expression serious. "Yeah, sometimes the best thing we can do is just be there for them when they're ready to talk or when they need us."
Armin sighed; his gaze heavy with regret. "You're right," he admitted, a sense of resignation settling over him. "I just hope they both find their way through this, somehow."
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fatuismooches · 6 months
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FOR THE HARBINGERS
Reader telling them "I love you", and they either smile, fluster or say ilyt BUT reader is like " no you don't understand ". Grabs them by the shoulder, looks them dead straight in the eye and says it slowly once again. " I. Love. You." And proceed to say the most devoted, loving words about them and how reader is so in love, loyal and just. UGHHHH
Take it easy! Just bask into this idea, hope you don't stress over answering a bunch of (my 😭) asks!! Mwah mwah 💕💕 /p
OH I AM MORE THAN BASKING INTO THIS BECAUSE IT IS SO REAL!!!! We love a reader who is completely and utterly in love with their Harbingers <3 Pierro and Capitano are the ones who stay silent as you go on a whole tangent about how much you love them. Pierro retains his usual serious look, but you're so caught up with your words you may not notice how his face turns softer at your blatant declarations of devotion. Sure, he has a mountain of work to catch up on, but what kind of lover would he be if he didn't let his love rant their feelings out to him? He's not the most verbal or physically affectionate, but that doesn't mean he doesn't appreciate it. I imagine he's been betrayed and such in the past, you know with Celestia and Khaenri'ah and all, so he deeply appreciates your words. Capitano... well, you can never really see his expression with that big helmet of his, so it's a bit hard to tell what he's thinking but don't worry!! His heart is beating quicker than usual and his mind is racing as to what to reply with!! Since when did you become so romantic and affectionate? He hasn't read enough romance advice books to respond properly yet! So Capitano just... pats your head and thanks you so sincerely it makes you giggle. He attempts to formally respond to your feelings via writing but he can't find the right words, unfortunately.
Dottore (that's who you're here for, I know) merely bursts into a laugh. No, he's not laughing at you, but he simply finds it a bit amusing. The idea of true devotion, of genuine loyalty, of real love... he still toys with those concepts a bit. He does feel these things toward you, but he won't verbalize them. Yet you don't seem to care about admitting those feelings toward him in the slightest... in fact, it seems like you jump at the chance to tell him how much you adore him... it's a bit funny to Dottore. Of course, he won't ever stop you, he does enjoy being worshipped and loved by you. Akademiya Zandik, on the other hand, would probably fight you off and then storm away to hide his blushing cheeks. How dare you say such idiotic things to him and how dare you make his heart thump hard at such stupid words. Pantalone too, except it's less of a laugh and more of a few chuckles. He's the kind of person to smile and nod at everything you say, completely enamored by you. He'll stop you in the middle and ask you to elaborate on a specific part and you happily do, he's stroking his own ego at this point but how can you blame him? His darling is being far too cute for him not to want to tease them a bit!
Columbina and Childe are very excited and blushy over it. They adore it when you're so open with them! Columbina's smile is even larger than usual as she hums in agreement with everything you're saying. Yes, please keep adoring her like this. She loves hearing about how much you love her. She's quite open with her feelings toward you too, so to hear it reciprocated so plainly? Pure bliss for her! Childe too is similar, you can literally see how he lights up and a faint blush spreads across his cheeks when you flatter him with such praise. But not for too long, because he'll pick you up and tease you ten times harder. Trying to get on his good side, hmm? Well, he'll have you know he loves you far more than you ever cold. Occasionally, he gets worried about whether it's right to be with you since he's in the Fatui, so these kinds of messages are secretly quite reassuring to him.
Arlecchino and Signora are very elegant and smooth about it. They watch you with a knowing smile, hands tracing over your collarbone and up to your neck and chin... a finger combing through your hair. Arlecchino is still a quiet and reserved woman, she still doesn't say much after your confession, but she is very pleased. Kisses you and gives you a sincere thank you. In her line of work, it's not often she find someone as loyally passionate as you are. Much less someone she loves to the deepest depths of her heart. She knows that you'll never betray or stab her in the back, and she shall never do that to you either. Signora is more smug and teasing about it. Oh? You truly love her that much? How about you show her it too? She ends up flustering you despite you being the one throwing all these sweet words at you. She truly loves being pampered by you, she needs it after all with all of the heartache she went through with her last lover, who she was abruptly cut off from.
Scaramouche and Sandrone short circuit for a few moments before springing back to life, stuttering and berating you for such stupidity and hurriedly breaking free from your grip. They can't deal with such loving words being directed towards them, especially unprompted. Scaramouche's expression is one that you have imprinted in your memory, the uncharacteristic redness and slack jaw, before he becomes his usual Scara self and launches into a long speech about how clingy and strange you were and that you should never do that ever again lest he actually get mad (this is a plea for you to confess all of that again, despite his adamant protest... you know he loves being loved, a feeling that always seemed to slip away from him. He's hesitant about it but he can't deny the rush of his "heart" when he hears your sincere words.) Sandrone's face is just blank. Blank like a robot. She opens her mouth to speak and then closes it, and then opens it again but she's at a loss for words. She finally gets out a half-hearted insult and ends up stuttering halfway through, so that's already not a good look for her. It seems even her usual bad attitude can't keep up when assaulted with such genuine affection...
And... Papanella can get a little platonic kiss on the cheek while you thank him for being the best grandad.
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mysteria157 · 3 months
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Chapter 4
Pairing: Nanami Kento x Black Fem Reader
Word Count: ~3.8k
CW: Profanity
Summary: When you think you’re a step ahead to keep Nanami out of your way, your world comes crashing down and makes it harder for you to decide to break the news.
Notes: Hi! Thank you all for taking the time to read. Reblogs, likes, or comments are always appreciated but not necessary &lt;3 I hope you enjoy reading!
Previous Chapter | Ao3 | Next Chapter
It Had To Be You Masterlist
Divider: @cafekitsune
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“Who’s the father?”
The question made you flinch, tears long since stopped running and your face was surely a mess. You couldn’t answer her and couldn’t look at her even though her silver eyes were tearing you down by the second.
“Y/n. Who is the father?”
You kept your watery gaze at your desk, hoping the silence would be enough for her.
She was quiet for longer than what you hoped for, making you antsy and tense until you eventually flicked your gaze up at her. Ome furrowed her eyebrows, her face etching into a look of pure confusion before falling into disbelief, the pieces clicking together.
“Nanami?! I know you’ve always had a boner for the guy, but I’m pretty sure the last time we were in Tokyo, he made every effort to piss you off and your affection pretty much fizzled out.”
You didn’t respond, choosing instead to look down at your hands that sat pathetically in your lap. You shouldn’t have felt so chastised by Ome. But she knew you inside and out; your goals, your values and your personality. So, the surprise was warranted. The small hint of disbelief made all the more sense as well.
“Was it when we went to the izakaya?” You nodded softly; eyes still turned away. “I tried to follow you but Gojo told me Nanami texted and said he took you home. I thought he apologized.”
Oh, he took you home alright. He took you to your hotel and barely made it inside before you both were pulling at each other’s clothes and falling into a drunken and sweaty heap on your bed.
The sudden heat in your cheeks pulled you back to the present, your mind racing with every intricate detail of that night before you shook away the thoughts. Now wasn’t the time.
“What happened? Did he…you know…?”
You paled and scoffed harshly.
“No. He may get on my last nerve but Nanami isn’t a monster.” 
You went into detail about that night, describing the conversation between you both before stopping when things got entirely too explicit. 
“I thought things would be a little better after that but I woke up and he was gone and I got this instead.”
You pulled out your phone, scrolling to a chat that you wished you should have deleted sooner. How Nanami managed to get your number, you’ll never know. The only ones from Tokyo who had your number were Shoko, Gojo, and Yuji. Any one of them could have slipped him the number under the guise of wanted to discuss work related matters. You slid the phone to her, your gut churning as you watched her read the message exchange.
Nanami Kento: Y/n. I apologize for leaving abruptly this morning. We were both incredibly intoxicated and made a decision that shouldn’t have occurred. I should not have kissed you. It was against my better judgement and I apologize for making you uncomfortable. Such a mistake will not happen again. 
You did not make me uncomfortable and I understand. 
Nanami Kento: Great. Have a safe flight.
“I’ll kill him.”
Ome’s words were laced with poison, permeating the air and making your skin prickle. She let the phone clunk onto your desk, pulling away from you to pace back and forth.
“He could have just told you that in person. Fucking coward, sending it through a text. I’ll beat his ass. Pull out his Scandinavian looking hair and stuff them down his throat.”
The room was thickening with tension, your nerves fraying and your head pounding, and you could feel your throat closing up, the usual anxiety placing its heavy hands on your shoulders as you let out a shaky breath.
“It was just one night. I had gotten over it really.” 
You hadn’t.
“But I have an IUD…we used a condom…I was careful, Ome.” Your words cracked at the end, tears swimming in your vision as your emotions fluttered away from you, slipping through your fingers like melted butter. “I was careful…”
She stopped pacing, sensing your unease and coming to kneel in front of you.
“I know you were, honey. But unfortunately shit happens….and the important question right now is, are you going to keep it?”
You shook out a watery sigh, brushing away fat tears as you tried desperately to get yourself under control. The thought of an abortion had crossed your mind briefly, so fleeting that you never really let the idea simmer. Of course, you wanted a little more time in life. You were already twenty-nine but even another year or two would have been great. You could earn more money, get a higher position, find someone to settle down with.
But not everything goes according to plan and maybe this was karma for always trying to be predict how your life was going to go. While you wanted a partner to be there for you…you could do this on your own. You’ve gotten this far with your own hard work and dedication, raising a baby would be more challenging but not impossible.
You had a house that could be a home for even two children—three if you wanted to push it; a nice backyard, a good neighborhood, great schools. It was doable. And you had Ome, who would be more than enough.
“I’m keeping it. I don’t need him to raise a child. But I still need to fucking tell him and I just—” You groaned softly, wiping at your face as your eyes began to sting again. “Jin wants me to come with him to Tokyo next week for a new project that I’ll have a larger role in. I can’t avoid him; he has to know. But I can’t do this by myself Ome.”
“I’ll come with you.” She was steadfast in her response, soft hands rubbing your arms. “Don’t argue with me. You and I both know Jin would let me go with you in a heartbeat. I’m not going to let you do any of this alone.”
“Stop being so nice.” You tried to tease her through your flickering voice, body beginning to shake as your throat tightened even more. You wrung your hands together, skin tingling and beginning to perspire with cold sweat. Your chest gave a painful lurch and you could practically feel your heart beating against your ribcage. “I don’t deserve it.”
She scoffed, placing a hand on your cheek before turning you to face her. Your vision was shaking and suddenly you realized your entire body was trembling with fear.
“You’re not going to the guillotine, you’re pregnant. But you’re also having an anxiety attack, so I need you to breathe.” You followed her instructions, pulling a shaky but long breath into your lungs before exhaling. Eventually the heart palpitations stopped, the trembling reduced to intermittent jolts, and your hands had cooled against your legs. “You know exactly what you deserve, and self-loathing is not it.”
She pulled you onto your feet and went about tidying up the office; she closed the blinds, shut off the computer, gathered your purse and held out your jacket for you. You wordlessly shoved your arms into the sleeves and smiled softly at her as you pulled your purse over your shoulder. You rushed into her arms, burying your face in her shoulder as she rubbed your back soothingly.
“I told you once in middle school that I would protect you, and I will continue to do so. Just me and you, buddy.”
“Thank you.”
She hummed in reply, the motion of her hand on your back relaxing you slowly.
“I haven’t kicked a man’s ass in a long time so I might be a little rusty.”
You shook a wet chuckle into her shirt.
***
Gojo Satoru: Why did I have to find out from Yaga that you’re gonna be in the office tomorrow? Do you not like me? I thought we had something going here.
I honestly wanted to surprise you. 
Gojo Satoru: Lies.
Ome is coming.
Gojo Satoru: I forgive you 😘  
You were only expected to be in Tokyo for a few days but already your phone was blowing up with messages from Yuji, Shoko, and Gojo. It brought you a small feeling of warmth to be so accepted by people who had only known you a few weeks. You had always kept to yourself growing up. The tiny group of friends that you and Ome did have moved overseas after college and while you maintained contact, it wasn’t the same as seeing each other in person. You were just naturally introverted and were content to go to work, partake in a few hobbies when you had the time, and be a homebody.
So to feel Gojo pull you into a bear hug when you walked into the office that Monday, you savored the feeling of having more people who wanted to be close.
“Where is my lover?”
You couldn’t tell if his persistence with Omelia bordered on delirium or fear of rejection.
“She’s with Yaga and Jin, and she’s definitely not your lover.” 
You could have told him that Ome had a boyfriend, but even you weren’t really sure what the status of that was anymore. She spent most of her time complaining about him but not actively trying to leave him. Even after cheating. Regardless, it wasn’t your business to tell and you wouldn’t risk Ome’s privacy and trust. But Gojo was surprisingly nice—even if a little eccentric and chaotic—so Ome couldn’t strangle your neck if you gave him a little nudge.
After all you were pregnant, she wouldn’t be able to strangle you for a least the next ten months anyway.
“Stop trying so hard with her. If there is one thing Ome hates, it’s men who act like they have it all.” He opened his mouth to protest. “Even if you do have it all Gojo, carrying on like an annoying teenager will only earn you a punch in the face from someone like her. Like most women, she naturally hates men. But unlike most women, she will get violent if you don’t calm the fuck down.”
He shuddered; bright blue eyes filled with playful desire. The action made you chuckle softly, your face curling into a grimace.
“My soulmate.”
It was during the first team meeting of the day when Jin announced the new project that would be completed by both Tokyo and Sendai branches and that you would be working as a Co-Lead. Everyone seemed excited about the prospect, especially Yuji. You couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm as he asked his father questions, ignoring Megumi’s gentle but annoyed demands to stop talking.
You already knew to expect the glower from Nanami.
You did your best to ignore him, you really did. But just the quick glance in his direction and your eyes caught the subtle hint of disapproval in his eyes. Through the dark tint of his glasses you could see his brown irises oozing discontent. His words from five weeks ago echoed in your head, pounding in your ears and making you feel small and unimportant.
Your ideas were good. They were useful and everyone loved them. You were confident in your abilities.
So, you shot a sharp look back at him, challenging him silently as everyone else talked around you and fell into a lull in the background.
“Reworking a system that has been nothing but efficient makes no sense, wastes resources, and does nothing for no one.”
He was wrong. There was always room for improvement, and you could help make things so much better if he just pulled his head out of his ass and paid attention to you.
“Why do you care so much about my opinion?”
You watched him take a characteristic deep breath, his posture slouching forward slightly as he rested his chin atop one of his large hands, eyes not leaving yours. You refused to give in, narrowing your own at him stubbornly and trying your best to ignore the heat in your gut as he lifted an angry but perfect eyebrow.
No. You were in charge this time. You called the shots and you would be ready to tell him to shut up the moment he tried to voice any disagreement with you.
That night meant nothing in the grand scheme of things when you had a job to do.
Even though his mouth that was currently pressed into a firm line had also kissed, licked, and bitten almost every inch of your skin that night, it meant nothing. Even though his efficiency at the office carried quite well into the bedroom when he made you cum three times, it meant nothing. And even though the voice that normally shot down your suggestions had done nothing but encourage and groan and praise you as you begged for release, it meant fucking nothing.
But it meant something now that you were carrying a product of that night, now that you would have to tell him he was the father of your child.
If you even told him.
No, of fucking course you were going to tell him. How that was going to happen, you had no idea. But until then, you knew he would go above and beyond to keep the project from going your way.
Yaga was initially a little puzzled when you asked that approvals be routed to another director instead of Nanami. It was a ballsy move that had taken your entire stay in Tokyo to finally make the decision to speak to him.
“I mean no disrespect to Nanami-san, his work is fantastic, but I think it’s no deny that he is not the most…supportive to processes outside of scope.” Yaga had simply chuckled, his hard features relaxing slightly as he contemplated your words. “Please do not remove him from the project. I would still like him involved, but in order for this project to actually go live, we need eyes that are going to see all aspects, even if they are different.”
The minute he approved your ask and sent an IM to Nanami to see Yaga in his office, you knew it wouldn’t be long until he would be looking for you. You just needed to get to 5pm, hurry to the airport and settle for a scathing phone call in Sendai where you wouldn’t have to see Nanami’s face.
You thought you were in the clear.
You shouldn’t have been so confident in yourself.
You were furious as you stood in front of your boss and Yaga in his office. Whatever Nanami had told Yaga seemed to be enough to rescind the decision to remove him from the approval process and dissolve the co-lead position as Jin would be more than enough. Yaga had muttered something about the sensitivity of the project, the visibility of higherups that would be involved and Nanami’s ‘years of experience with an eye that can catch things most miss’.
He was still babbling on and on but frankly you didn’t really care anymore. You had been made a fool of and reduced to nothing but an associate from another branch trying and failing to make a difference.
The more crushing blow came from Jin’s lack of defense. Even with his characteristic soft eyes and gentle smile, his face clearly showed he had conceded to Yaga’s words, agreeing with him in ways you didn’t understand. He had mentored you. Shown you everything. Having you co-lead was his idea. He had insisted that the decision to dissolve the position was from the higherups and the higherups alone, Nanami had not suggested it but he definitely insinuated that they would be looking.
But even still…
The sharp pang of betrayal was heavy in your chest, turning painfully like a knife and making your eyes burn. You blinked away the tears before smiling at them both and agreeing with their decision. You didn’t have the energy to argue but you could feel the betrayal melt and morph slowly into raw and unbridled rage.
Nanami fucking Kento.
The stress of finding the appropriate time to tell Nanami about the baby fell at your feet in that moment when you closed the door to Yaga’s office quietly and stormed to Nanami’s office. You didn’t knock, all sense of decorum had evaporated the minute you saw that stupid gold name plate on his door and yanked it open.
He was expecting you. Of course, he was. He was the poster child of apathy as he sat reclined in his red leather chair with one leg crossed over the other, arms folded over his chest that made the fabric of his blue button up shirt stretch tight over muscles you had scraped your nails down weeks ago.
“You’re a piece of shit!” you hissed angrily at him, your fists clenching hard at your sides. “You’re a piece of shit that would rather go about his mundane life, doing the same things over and over because that’s what’s expected of him.” His indifferent stare slowly faded into one irritation, hands minutely clenching his arms. “Clock in at the same time, go about the same mind numbing routine during the day, clock out at the same time. You do the minimum of what is required to make your life easy and admonish anyone else who chooses to do more.”
He didn’t respond at first, his mind spiraling with scathing retorts that he wanted to throw your way. He hated the truth in your words. Or the truth to some degree. The bare minimum was all that was really necessary to get the job done, and he got the job done well. He made good money, got home at a decent time, got to enjoy the things he could in his spare time. Why do any different?
“But you went out of your way to make me look like a fool to Yaga because what?! Because I want to do better? I want to do more and make a difference?!”
“No.”
You bit the inside of your lip, holding back a plethora of curses that you wanted to slew in his direction.
“I went out of my way to make Yaga see reason that he was letting someone who has no idea of how this branch works, try to take the helm.” He stood slowly, walking around his desk before long legs made their way to you. You were shaking with anger to a degree that was making you lightheaded. There was no point in trying to hide your emotions from him. He had crossed a line that had released the shackles of your professionalism around him.
That familiar scent of his cologne slowly drifted up your nose, teasing and seductive, trying its best to make you pliant and submissive. You wouldn’t give in. You wouldn’t. Not this time.
“Your ideas are not bad, y/n. But with this environment, in this kind of office, they will only do more harm than good. To everyone else you are the breath of fresh air that can bring this company to the top of the marketing food chain. But I see right through you. All your suggestions are nothing but a desire for attention.”
The rage flared in your gut, your eyes widening in defiance as you opened your mouth to argue.
“You’re a bright eyed marketing specialist that just wants to be seen, a status climber with no regard for the long term effects of what you want to bring to the table. You’ll do anything to get ahead, even if that means tearing down the company that helped elevate you.”
The sound of your hand making contact with his face should have shocked you. Nanami’s head, that was knocked to the side from your harsh slap, turned back to you, his eyes wide in alarm and cheek blooming red.
You were delirious with rage, shoulders heaving deeply as the smell of hate leeched through your pores. You never would have expected those words to come from his mouth, no matter how serious and stoic he naturally was. You ignored the alarming bells of workplace assault in the back of your mind.
You didn’t care. You didn’t fucking care. He deserved it.
“Well, I’m glad to know how you really feel. That makes this so much fucking easier.” He still hadn’t moved, his eyes beginning to blink away the shock as he gaped down at you. “I’m pregnant.”
You didn’t think he could look more shocked as the words spat from your mouth. You didn’t take pity on him, if anything the expression on his face only fueled your words more. 
“I’m keeping it, even though you have no say in the matter. I don’t need your help and frankly I don’t want it. If you want to be involved in the child’s life then I won’t stop you, but I have ten months to be away from you until then.”
You walked to his door, ignoring his silence before you turned to look back at him. “You were right by the way. That night was definitely a mistake. And while I don’t regret the fact that I’m pregnant or that I’ll love it any less, I think I’ll hate the thought that you’re the father for a very long time.”
You didn’t slam the door this time, the anger seemed to evaporate from your body the minute the a/c from the hallway hit your face.
When you finally saw Ome, the look on your face must have been enough for her to piece together what happened. She didn’t speak, didn’t ask for an explanation, didn’t try to tease you to put a smile on your face. She simply helped you into your coat, put your purse over your shoulder and grabbed your hand. Her soft skin was like a tether, grounding you as much as possible to the present and reminding you that you weren’t alone.
You didn’t see Nanami as you said goodbye to Geto and Gojo or when Yuji pulled you into a teary hug, even though he would probably see you in a few weeks. But you were glad Nanami didn’t seek you out, because you didn’t know if the sight of his face would flare the anger inside of you again or make you burst into tears.
This should have been different. It should have been a heartfelt moment; a pregnancy test wrapped in a cute ribbon as you presented it as a surprise to him. It should have been tears of happiness, two people lovingly coming together to celebrate the beginning of new life brewing in your belly.
But as you were slowly and painfully beginning to accept, nothing goes as planned. No matter how hard you worked.
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gingerjolover · 7 months
Text
Unspoken - Lucy Dacus x fem!reader
Synopsis: Lucy and Crew!Reader don't have to say it but they're in looooove
G's notes: Thank you guys for all the support :') I have had the shittiest month and feel so grateful for all the sweet messages and encouragement I've received. Things are finally returning to normal, so this is literally like 1/5 stories I have to post! (lmfao)
Julien fic is up next!!!
WC: somewhere around 1.2k...again
Warnings: RPF, smoking ciggies, kissing, julien calling you punk, swearing ig
feedback is appreciated and welcomed but pls be kind!
boygenius, “the tour,” 25 shows come and gone. It’s dark outside, the Red Rocks amphitheater slowly emptying, fans and crew alike buzzing from a fantastic performance to end the US leg of the tour. It's hard to tell if the elevation in Colorado is dizzying or if the post-show high is slowly infiltrating the band. 
You and Julien are sitting backstage, hoodie-clad and shivering but still leaning against the back of a truck, smoking cigarettes out of sight from the exiting crowd. “You sure you don't wanna help them?” you ask Julien teasingly, pointing to the crew loading equipment into the vans. “Oh fuck off!” Julien laughs; it's obvious she’s staying as far away as clean up as possible, her willingness to help often making it harder for the crew.
Lucy approaches the two of you, changing out of her stage uniform into a pair of flowy pants and a hoodie. Her eyes glimmer, her cheeks flushed, and her hair slightly messed up from pulling her hoodie over her head. She smirks as she walks closer to you, the tension rising as you stare at each other, smiling.  
There’s something unspoken, not quite a relationship but more than a friendship, bubbling beneath the surface. Julien smirks, noticing the tension, coughing softly before taking another drag herself. 
Lucy leans beside you and takes your cigarette, taking a long drag and exhaling a puff of smoke,
"How about that show?" Lucy says. "It felt like it went by in a blink."
You can’t help but let out a contented sigh, nodding in agreement. Having spent hours on the road with the band, working and chatting, it's impressive how fast shows fly by. 
“You did great, Luce, like always,” you smile, eyes twinkling, tucking some of Lucy’s hair behind her ear. 
Lucy smiles back at you brightly, her lipstick slightly messed up from kissing Phoebe and Julien on stage. She leans her head against your shoulder, enjoying the closeness. There's something so familiar and comforting about you; Lucy knows she can trust you with anything, and the natural connection that seems beyond words is evident to everyone around them.
You nonchalantly kiss Lucy’s forehead, avoiding Julien’s teasing eyes and wide smirk. Glaring at Julien, you turn your head away to take a drag from the cigarette.
Lucy's face flushes at the touch of your lips. What’s seemingly a quick, innocent kiss on the forehead makes her heart race.
“Jules… you want the rest of this?” you ask, holding up your cigarette, blowing the smoke out of the side of your mouth, away from Lucy.
"Nah, I'm good," Julien responds, smirking. She looks between you and Lucy, giving Lucy a subtle, knowing smile.
You hold out the cig for Lucy, waiting for her to take it between her lips.
She gently takes it, nodding playfully in thanks. She inhales and lets out a slow stream of smoke. Without thinking, her gaze drifts downwards, staring at your lips.
“Pretty,” you mumble softly, pulling the cigarette from her mouth. 
Lucy blinks and looks back up at you, blushing and embarrassed at having been caught staring at your lips. She keeps a minor distance between you both, leaning against the truck. You take another drag on the cigarette and smile, maintaining eye contact with Lucy.
"You look pretty good yourself," Lucy quips playfully, surprising the both of you.
“You feel okay? Still flushed from the show?” you ask, noticing Lucy’s pink cheeks, thumbing the meat of Lucy’s warm cheek. 
Lucy flushes even more, trying to stay composed and ignore her growing attraction, but her feelings are becoming more apparent.
"Yeah," she replies, attempting to act nonchalant. "Just...still processing everything, I guess." Lucy takes another drag on the cigarette and watches as the smoke evaporates in the cold night air.
“I’m gonna go grab Pheebs,” Julien says, awkwardly exiting. She’s a few yards away when she turns around, wiggling her eyebrows and winking at you. 
Widening your eyes at Julien, you turn back to Lucy, smiling at her softly. “So, you ready for Europe?” you tease Lucy, staring at her eyes and lips. 
Lucy nods and huffs out a breath, slightly taken aback by your teasing expression. She doesn't know how to respond, not often getting stuck like this; her eyes are drawn to your lips again.
"For sure," Lucy replies with a forceful laugh, attempting to sound chill.
"I've heard that European crowds are even more enthusiastic than back home, so hopefully, you’re prepared,” you tease in a sing-song voice, leaning closer. 
Lucy crushes the cigarette on the ground with a slight grin. "So... what about you? Are you ready for the next leg of the tour?" she asks, biting her bottom lip.
“I’ll only be seeing y’all in a few cities, unfortunately,” you pout, “but I’ll be back on the fall leg,” you reassure, stepping closer again.  
Lucy's cheeks flush ever so slightly at your remark, her smile dipping momentarily when she realizes there will be some separation soon, having gotten used to your presence working on the tour.
"Well, I’ll miss you while you're away," Lucy says softly. “I… I mean, we all will, you know, because you are such a big part of the crew…” Lucy trails off, swallowing the lump in her throat as she stares into your eyes. You grab her hand, rubbing it with your thumb. 
A brief silence passes, and Lucy breaks it again, her voice softer.
"I..." she stops, finding it difficult to say what she wants.
“You don’t have to say anything Luce,” you murmur, interlocking your fingers, eyes staring into Lucy’s, dropping to her lips. “I feel it too,” you say softly, smiling widely. 
Lucy's eyes go wide. She hadn't anticipated that response and hesitated momentarily before leaning closer toward you. She brushes her lips gently against yours, a moment of pure intimacy. Holding the kiss for a few moments as if time had stopped moving.
Lucy slowly pulls away and looks at you, her heart racing. She can feel the heat from the kiss on her lips, and her entire body is awash with emotion. She looks back into your deep eyes and tries to control herself.
Your smile widens, leaning back into Lucy, connecting your lips again. Your hand cradles her jaw, tongue softly sliding against Lucy’s. 
Lucy's hand moves up to your waist, pulling you closer.  You share a passionate kiss, mouths pressed together with a growing intensity. Lucy's body trembles, and her heart pounds rapidly in her chest. She can feel your shaky breaths between kisses, and the sound of her pulsing heart fills her ears.
You kiss for several more seconds before finally pulling apart. A deep silence hangs in the air before you lean forward again to brush your lips against Lucy's cheek.
“Hey punk, you got a light?” Julien calls to you somewhere hidden backstage, likely standing with other crew members. 
Leaning back to not yell in Lucy’s ear, “Coming,” you shout, rolling your eyes and making Lucy giggle. 
Some of the band is approaching Lucy, so you turn to her gently. “I’ll be back, yeah?” before leaning to kiss the corner of her mouth. 
Lucy watches you walk away, her eyes trailing down your body. She’s distracted as she greets the band, leaning up against the truck with her, with a small smile despite so much left unspoken.
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obsessedelusional · 1 year
Text
opposite
paring ✦ Bella Ramsey x Reader
summary ✦ It’s hard to move on when your ex is a famous actor. As a even more famous singer your bound to see each other. What happens when Bella allegedly starts dating their costar? Who looks entirely the opposite of you.
word count ✦ 3,700ish
authors note ✦ I saw Sabrina Carpenter live and this song has been stuck in my head so it inspired this. Also the most recent request I got had the sweetest not ever just about cried reading it. Just wanted to let who ever sent that know I appreciate you so much. Almost to 900 omg thank uuuuuuuuuu
masterlist
FEEDBACK AND REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!!
⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹
Your ex partner, Bella Ramsey, had finally found the success they always wanted. Which only made the break up harder, seeing their stupidly handsome face everywhere.
You were an even more successful singer, your rise to fame began when you stared in a popular children’s show. As you aged and left the show you began posting covers online. Eventually sharing snippets of your original work, one went mega viral changing the trajectory of your life. Releasing the song began your music journey and you hadn’t acted since.
It all started when the director of a movie Bella would be staring in approached you to write a song that would be featured in the movie, you were ecstatic. You were invited to the premiere where you were introduced to Bella. Your attraction to them was instantaneous.
Unfortunately you didn’t get to see them again that night. When you arrive home that night you throw on your comfiest clothes. Laying in bed you waste no time cyber stalking Bella. Doesn’t take you much time to find their instagram. You smile seeing the follow back button. You click it before sending a simple message about how you enjoyed the film. Truth be told you weren’t paying much attention to it. It takes a couple hours but Bella responds thanking you. This conversation sparked many more before finally inviting Bella over. A handful more of casual dates lead to you two making it official.
Your relationship with Bella was extremely private entirely on their part. You wanted the world to know but they weren’t ready. So you never pushed the issue figuring Bella would be ready eventually. Six months later and they weren’t ready, starting the downfall of the relationship.
Missing opportunities because Bella wanted you with them. A big event would be nearing and suddenly Bella desperately needed you in England. Only for you to arrive and Bella be distracted. One time you arrived and Bella never responded to your messages. You were in their home town for a whole 24 hours before they got back to you. They came out with some bullshit excuse.
Making you feel like shit for going to events while they were in town. Leading to arguments because they were always invited. Sometimes you couldn’t help but feel like they were jealous of the fact that you were on a whole different plane of fame than them. Or maybe they felt inadequate. Bella shut down at every conversation about the relationship so you never understood the underlying issues.
It all came to an end when you had planned a trip to Paris for the two of you, somewhere you had always dreamt of visiting. They were well aware of this fact, telling you that one day they’d take you.
Bella would be done filming their most recent project around the time you’d be on a two week break from tour. You wanted nothing more than to spend it with Bella. Things had started to go stale, hoping this would help things to be like when you first started dating. When you arrive to Nottingham you surprise them expecting them to be as excited as you.
“I don’t want to go.” Bella responds flatly, reading over the card you worked hard on. The plane tickets slipped inside.
“Why not?” You ask, irritation heavy on your voice.
“Because I’ve been there before so many times. Plus we can’t go anywhere without paps following you around. Surprised you made it here without being followed.” They set the card down, walking away from you.
“Would it be so bad if people knew we were dating?” You respond, Bella just looks at you unable to talk.
“I don’t understand. Every single time I try to do anything besides sit in your apartment for weeks on end you shut it down. I’m always traveling to see you. Not once have you come to LA when it wasn’t part of your job.” You speak, voice shaking. Not sure if your about to start crying or yelling. Maybe both?
“You know I don’t like LA.” Bella says only responding to part of what your just said.
“I don’t like being a secret but I do it because it’s what you want. We do things we don’t like for the people we love.” The mention of love sends tears running down your cheeks.
“Whatever.” Bella huffs pulling their phone out. Every time you tried to discuss anything uncomfortable Bella always shut down, typical.
“Fuck this.” You spit out wiping away at the tears, reaching for the card. Pulling the tickets out of the envelope and taking one. Tossing the other ticket at Bella, their face fills with confusion as they pick it up from the floor.
“I’m going to Paris with or without you. Our hotel information is in the card. You know where to find me if you want to continue whatever the fuck this is cause I’m done.” Bella doesn’t plead or try to stop you like part of you wish they had.
When your out in the hallway of their apartment complex that’s when the real waterworks start. Between tears you shoot a text to your personal body guard that had dropped you off requesting a pickup.
Your sat outside crying just long enough for some one to sneak a video of you. Posting it to twitter that day going viral, most people wondering why you were so upset. The greater half of the internet turning into a meme. So that for the rest of your existence you’d be reminded of the day your relationship with Bella ended.
A couple days later your were in Paris all by your lonesome self. You decided after two days of moping in the hotel room it was time to get your shit together. Taking a long hot shower washing the breakup off your body and out of your hair. Hadn’t heard anything from Bella which was probably for the best.
You take your time to do your make up. Spending even more time on picking an outfit out. This would be your first time making an public appearance since the video. Your manager pressing you to post something about it. When your done your body guard is waiting for you in the car outside. They drive you to the Eiffel Tower.
Your in awe as they park, the tower perfectly in your view. Your quick out of the car your body guard hurrying to catch up. Your late start to the day puts a pip in your step. Momentarily you forget about everything doing the stereotypical tourist things. Taking pictures of the tower and then photos of your self with the tower. Enlisting the help of your body guard to get better photos, laughing at their attempt.
When you finally get your phone back you scroll through the photos smiling. Until you hear your name softly, looking up your greeted by a young girl.
“Hi,” you smile. They start talking about how much they love you and your music. You thank them pulling them in for a hug, the fan not realizing how much you needed that hug.
“I know it’s none of my business but I hope whatever had you so upset in that video has been resolved or something. I just hope your feeling better, I guess that’s what I’m trying to say.” They laugh at their own words, you smile thanking them again. You ask them if they’d like a picture, your body guard snaps a few for the fan.
“Thank you,” the fan says before going to leave.
“No thank you, I appreciate you.” You respond.
It doesn’t take long before a small crowd of people forms wanting your attention. You talk to each one, taking photos with everyone. Thirty minutes have passed and the suns starting to set. You say you goodbyes before following the body guard to the car. In the car you scroll through all the photos you took tonight. Favoriting a few, deleting the rest and editing your favorites.
Once in the hotel room you decide it’s time to make a post. You post several photos in one post, doing a photo dump of your adventures from the last few days. The first photo you in front of the Eiffel Tower, the second a shot of the tower by itself. The third photo you crying in your hotel room, a snap chat you had sent your friend. Deciding to attach a screenshot of the video that went viral or you sobbing outside of Bella’s apartment. Ending it with an off guard photo of you laughing.
caption: if you’re going to be sad you might as well be sad in paris
3 Months Later
Bella’s most recent tv show has been doing so well that the entire world was tuning in every Sunday night. Expect you of course, you refused for your own well-being. It’s hard to avoid her though at this point everyone’s talking about the show. Your feed flooded constantly with posts about the show.
Clips of the Bella and their love interest had been blowing up all over TikTok flooding your for you page. Causing you to fall down a rabbit hole every time which only made their videos appear more often. The only good thing to come out of this was you spent less time on your phone.
Tour has come to an end, it was amazing but you were ready to relax. Your recent breakup was inspiring many songs, the next album coming along easily. Your visiting your parents in your home town, staying in the room you grew up in. Not much has changed since you left years ago. To your dismay your younger sibling was obsessed with Bella’s new show, begging you to watch it with them. Constantly bringing it up in conversation.
“I’m surprised you haven’t seen it. The show has girl on girl action in it.” They casually say at the kitchen table.
“Don’t refer to it as that.” You roll your eyes.
“Whatever. You’d love it. We should binge the show today and then we can watch the new episode tomorrow.” They suggest.
“I’m good.”
“That Bella girl is in it. Remember she starred in that Amazon movie you made a song for?”
“Yeah I remember.” You respond, ready for this conversation to end.
“I ship her character and her costar, Cleo. They’re so cute. I think they’re dating in real life.”
“Why do you think that?” Suddenly interested in the conversation.
“They’re always together all over social media. They look pretty much in love.” You reach for your phone pulling it out, opening instagram. Typing Bella’s at into the search bar, clicking on their profile once it pops up. Photos of Cleo filling Bella’s feed.
“There’s no fucking way.” You groan aloud, seeing the photo of the two of them hugging in front of the Eiffel Tower. The place you had begged Bella to take you to before the breakup. They refused to because they didn’t want anyone to know you were dating. Or maybe it cause they didn’t want Cleo to know? They were filming this show the entirety of your relationship with Bella.
“What?” Your sibling questions.
“Nothing.” You mutter, leaving them sat alone at the kitchen table. Straight to your bedroom you head. You find Bella’s new “friends” Instagram, taking note of the follow back button. Scrolling just far enough to find a post with your lyrics as a caption. Bella was still keeping you as a secret. You could feel your self getting angrier by the second. You had cried so much over this entire situation now only anger left.
Then noticing all the differences between you and her. Opposite colored hair and eyes. Body entirely different, looks nothing like you. Apparently Bella had a type and obviously wasn’t you. Why does Bella look so happy in this photos? Why could they be happy with you?
It all starts to click Bella was holding out for the opposite. Most likely dragging you along until they found what they actually wanted, Cleo. Even if you never left Bella that day your relationship would of never worked out, you weren’t Bella’s type. They’ve at most been dating for three months and Bella was ready to be public in Paris of all places.
That night you stay up super late. Your brain heavily inspired by the news shoved in your face this morning. After several hours you have a shell of a song deciding to title it Opposite.
♫ Oh, so you do have a type? And it's not me.
Oh, so you can reply? Just to not me.
So y'all are in Paris now? Guess it's public. ♫
Some time has passed since you finished writing Opposite. Normally releasing a song took months but you stressed the importance of this being done. So a week later it was upload to all steaming platforms. Within the first day it is clear it’s on its way to becoming a massive hit. You phone is flooded with compliments on the song.
The smallest part of you wondering if Bella’s heard it. Curiosity gets the better part of you, pulling up Cleo’s instagram on your secret account. Clicking her story where it shows a screenshot of your song with the caption, “Can’t stop listening to this.” You can’t help but smile thinking about Bella being forced to listen to this over and over again.
Weeks have passed since you released Opposite. It went number one on the second day and hasn’t left since. Your next gig is an awards show, you’ve been busy practicing. Adding Opposite into the mix among the other songs you’ll be performing.
“You think your ready for tonight?” Your agent asks.
“Yeah.” You respond, you had just finished the last rehearsal for tonight. Getting approval from the award shows reps. The show started in three hours.
“Time to get you to hair and makeup.” You nodded following your agent to your backstage room. Your name posted on the door.
Once inside your greeted by the girls who regularly did your makeup and hair. They spend a solid two hours working on you. You rush getting dressed in the red carpet dress. Just as they’re applying the finishing touches your agent comes into room notifying you that it’s time to walk the carpet.
Your walked out of the back of the building, ushered into a car. The car drives around to the entrance where everyone arrives to walk the carpet. As soon as you step out the crowd starts screaming for you. Camera flashes nearly blinding you as you walk out. Your agent is close behind guiding you through the carpet, instructing you where to stand and how long. Before you stop to do interviews you take pictures with some of the fans lined up outside.
The first two interviews you do are entirely harmless. Asking you questions about your music and if there’s a possible album on the way. You thank them when it comes to an end, quickly moving on to the next.
“You look so good tonight.” The next interviewer says.
“Aww thanks, you too!”
“Thank you. We’re really loving your new single! Is there an album in the works?”
“Perhaps.” You smile sheepishly.
“We can’t wait. You were recently turned in to a meme..” You physically cringe at the reminder.
“You we’re crying and a few months later Opposite was released. Are the two incidents related?”
“Yeah actually they are.” You laugh.
“We’ll I’m sorry you had to go through that but Opposite is a bop. That many can relate to, including me. So thank you and I can’t wait to listen to whatever you put out next.”
“Thank you. Thank you for saying that. You’re so sweet.” You say before saying your goodbyes. You move onto the next interview. Your busy answering their questions when you notice a familiar face a few spots down, it’s Bella. Cleo following closely behind. You rush through the last half of the interview, finding your agent letting them know your done.
They lead you inside where your sat at a table, where’d you be sitting until your performance. You read the name plates breathing a sigh of relief when Bella’s name isn’t on one. Your sat with other young female artists sitting fairly close to the stage. As the table starts to fill you create small talk with the girls.
You can’t help but notice Bella and Cleo enter. Cleo’s scanning the room her eyes light up when she sees you. She starts heading towards you. You turn your back to them muttering a silent fuck praying that she’s going literally anywhere else. Your prayers aren’t answered because you hear the sound of your name leaving her mouth.
“Hi.” You smile at Cleo. Bella stayed back watching the two of you intently. Probably terrified because if the math is mathin Bella was dating both of you at the same time. You could expose them in a heartbeat.
“Oh my god. I can’t believe it’s actually you. I love you so much. You’re music is everything to me. Like you have no clue.” Cleo gushes over you.
“Thank you. You’re too sweet.” Cleo asks for a photo so you agree standing up. She pulls you into a hug, any bad feelings towards her fade away. Realizing Bella’s the asshole in the situation. You pose for a quick selfie with her.
“Thank you so so so much.” Cleo pulls you into one last hug before running back to Bella. You can’t help but feel bad for her as she fangirls to Bella. Bella and Cleo sit a few tables down.
Your currently under the stage listening to the women who’s announcing your performance. You weren’t all that nervous until you realized Bella would be in the audience. The stage floor opens and your platform begins to rise, it’s time to go.
You start with a mashup of your most popular songs. Singing short snippets of each, moving on to the next. Hitting every note and dancing along with the back up dancers. Everything is going smoothly. Just as planned. The crowd cheers you on and most sing along. The lights go out briefly just quick enough for an outfit change. When the lights shoot back on your at the front of the stage, hands holding onto the microphone stand. The music for opposite stars, spotlight on you.
As the words spill out you can’t help but look to Bella. They look uncomfortable sat there, doing everything in their control not to look at you. As you continue signing Cleo looks happy signing with you, unaware of Bella.
♫ “She looks nothing like me. So why do you look so happy? Now I think I get the cause of it. You were holding out to find the opposite. Said I'm beautiful Was I being lied to?” ♫
You finish the rest of the song not once looking back to Bella. Too hard to look at the person who caused you so much pain. Once your done the audience erupts into applause. The host comes out greeting you.
“Damn girl that was amazing but that song is so so sad. Are you okay?” The laugh.
“I’m great actually. This is probably the coolest moment of my career.”
“Your on fire. I’d hate to be the one who hurt you.” They tease.
“Their loss.” You shrug your shoulders.
“Absolutely. Thank you for that amazing performance.” You thank the host before exiting the stage.
You busy changing into your final outfit of the night. A more casual dress that you can wear the rest of the night. A soft knock at the door has you looking up from the shoes your busy trying to shove on. Your entire team in near so you have no idea who it could possibly be.
“Can someone get that?” A few moments later Bella is stood there in the doorway.
“It’s Bella Ramsey.” Your assistant says. They don’t know any better because no one knows about your past with them.
“Can you give us a moment?” Your team nods leaving the room. Bella finally enters the room, keeping their distance. Wary of you might do next.
“What do you want? I don’t have much time before I have to go back out.”
“I wasn’t lying.”
“What?” You ask, confused.
“When I said your beautiful.” A laugh leaves your mouth, finding Bella’s cheesiness stupid. Bella’s phone vibrates.
“Thank I guess. Are we done?” Bella is busy looking at their phone so you ask.
“No I want to apologize-“
“Whatever you’re gonna say. Don’t.”
“Please just listen.” They plead, moving closer.
“I made a huge mistake. I should of taken you to Paris. I was a shit partner. You-” Bella rambles so you interrupt them once again.
“Don’t do this. It isn’t fair to Cleo.”
“You don’t understand the whole picture.” Bella responds their phone vibrating again.
“Seems important. You should take it and leave.”
“Not until you hear what I have to say.” They respond. You only cross your arms across your chest waiting for them to speak.
“I’ll be honest I was scared to go public with you because I knew no one would care about me and my acting. I’d always just be Y/N’s girlfriend. That’s it.”
“Doesn’t matter anyways your with Cleo.” You respond.
“Right before the last time you came to see me. Right before we wrapped up filming the director and a handful of PR pulled us into the office. Insisting that Cleo and I should pretend to date. Get more people to tune in.”
“I don’t believe that for a second.”
“It’s true. Said that fans shipped us heavily. They vaguely indirected that if we didn’t our characters might not see the next season. I was so distraught on what to do and then you came and broke it off. I took it as a sign on what to do.” Bella further explains, phone buzzing again.
“We are suppose to present an award any minute hence the persistent phone calls. I was told to announce our relationship on air tonight. I miss you so fucking much. I can’t do it knowing there’s even a slight chance you’ll forgive me.”
“This is all too much.” Is all you can manage to say letting your arms falls to your side.
“You don’t have to make your mind up right now. Just tell me not to go out there and announce it and I won’t.” You look over Bella their filled with panic.
“Don’t do it.” You whisper barely audible. Bella’s panic turns into joy. Smiling ear to ear before leaving you alone in your dressing room.
⊹ ꙳ ✦ ⁺ ‧ ⊹
thank you so much! I hope you enjoyed! If you did, please consider reblogging or leaving feedback. its all greatly appreciated and helpful!!
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the-grimm-writer · 17 days
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ok for my commissioned fic, i would like junkrat capturing reader with the line “aw, did a TRAP getcha?” aaaaaand noncon, you know what i like, make it painful, slapping, choking the 9 yards :) and a special guest appearance by roadhod is always appreciated :) thank you queen
Ehehehe silly honey forgot to add the reader's trying to escape <33
Tw: Junkrat. Noncon, degradation, slapping, hair pulling, choking.
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The sound of psychotic laughter rang in your ears as you ran . Your heart racing in your chest as you didn't dare to look behind you, knowing the man was right behind you the moment you ran out of the house.
Running down the secluded landscape, you screamed as an explosion rumbled under your feet, barely jumping out of the way in time before the ground cracked open. The mini bomb he'd planted going off with a small bang as fire quickly erupted from it.
The force of it pushed you forward, causing you to yelp as you hit the ground hard. The bomb wasn't enough to kill you, but it was definitely enough to get the message he was sending you across.
You groan in pain, but you still try to push yourself up. Knowing what was going to happen would be much worse if Junkrat caught you.
Just as you were about to get up, you cried out as a foot collided with your side, making you fall back down. You looked up to your captor, shaking his head in mock disappointment.
"Aw, did a TRAP get ya?" he pouted. But it didn't reach his eyes as he grabbed your arm and pulled you up. You could see the twisted delight in them. "Ya poor thing. But you broke the rules. And what am I if not a man of my words?"
"Fuck you!" You spat at him. He just responded with a tut, shaking his head before he raised his hand up and slapped you.
"Such a filthy mouth." He laughed, his eyes glinting with malice as he taunted you before a grimy hand curled around your hair and pulled you forward. "Now let's get back inside, on you go."
You struggled against him as he dragged you back by your hair, screaming and swearing, digging your shoes into the ground. You didn't even care if you possibly set off another trap. All you wanted was to get away from him.
But of course, your prayers were never answered. He pushed open the door and threw you inside, making you hit the floor like you were a rag doll, not even bothering to get you into the bedroom like he usually did.
You tried pushing yourself away, but he was much faster, pouncing on top of you as he started to rip off your clothes.
You screamed despite knowing there was nobody around to save you. And your screams were only met with more laughter as he left you vulnerable, slapping you whenever you got too rowdy and tried shoving him away from you.
"Such a pretty sight." He smirked as your clothes were a tathered mess as he pushed himself up just to push his pants down, pulling out his thick cock. He gave it a stroke before lining himself up with your pussy.
You tried sitting up, your eyes going wide. "Please, I'm sorry! I'm not ready!"
Junkrat smirked, not saying anything in response. Instead, he wrapped his hand around your neck and pushed you back down, shoving as much of himself as he could into you.
He moaned loudly, your tight pussy clenching down on him as he squeezed your neck. You weren't prepared, which made it a little harder for him, but that didn't stop him. Pulling back and brutally thrusting into you until he was balls deep inside you.
Taking a look at you, he grinned, realizing his cock wasn't the only thing making you panic. He'd been gripping a little too hard, realizing you could barely breathe as he choked you.
"Does that hurt?" He tilted his head, amused as your hands clawed at his wrist, trying to escape the grip he had around you, softening so you could let out a gasp.
You whimpered, nodding your head as his hand tightened around your throat as he thrusted into you.
"Awe, well, that's too bad." He chuckled darkly, enjoying the flushed look on your face each time he took your breath away as he ruthlessly pounded into you. "I'm not stopping until I'm done with ya."
Your soft cries were like music to his ears wach time the tip of his cock hit your cervix like he was trying to break it. No longer screaming and swearing at him like a little brat. His grunts were louder, not hiding how good you made him feel.
He was shameless in that way, not hiding how much pressure it gave him to hurt you like this. To have total control over you. Like he always wanted.
With a shutter, he slowly stopped, pushing as deep into you as possible as he came hard. Thick hot cum flooding your insides as darkspots filled your vision.
"Maybe I did get a little too carried away." He chuckled as he finally let go and stood up, putting his cock away and pulling up his pants. "Sorry, love."
Shakily, you let Junkrat pull you up, cum dripping down you thighs as you stood up. He wrapped his arms around you and kissed the top of your head. You flinched, hating when he was intimate more than when he was hurting you. He just gently rocked you back and forth, cooing at you lovingly until there was a knock on the door.
You paused for a moment, your breath hitching in your throat as the door opened and a large man stepped into the house, reeking of bad intentions.
His grin widened, wrapping his arms around your aching body and pulling you in close. "Oh? Did I forget to mention I have an old friend stopping by?" He cackled as he watched Roadhog slowly stalking towards you. "Aren't I nice? I got you all warmed up for the real punishment."
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1d1195 · 1 year
Text
Therapy IV
I didn't think I'd be writing a part four for this Therapy series if it wasn't for this message, thank you so much to this lovely anon.
Warnings: 18+ topics mentioned, jealous Harry
“My God, you’re beautiful,” she spun around and smiled at Harry approaching her much like the last time. “Y’really gonna be the death of me in this dress, kitten."
Hey, kitten, how’s your day? xx
The smile that popped onto her face made her stomach flutter at the same time as she opened her message from Harry. All she could think about was his sweet-dimpled face and his pretty eyes. Texting him at lunch time had become a routine for them. A quick check-in to get each other through the rest of the day.
It’s good, how’s yours?
It feels long. I want to go home and watch a movie with you.
She shamelessly giggled at her phone while she responded. Same here. I think it’s your turn to pick.
Well, I don’t actually plan on watching it, so I’ll let you pick. I just want to look at you and kiss you and stuff.
And stuff?
Good stuff, I promise. xx
She felt her cheeks warm even though no one was around her. I like the way you think, Harry.
Her phone rang instead of his response to her. “Hi,” Harry said cutely.
She giggled. “Hi.”
“I jus’ wanted t’say that no one in my past relationships ever really called me Harry,” he said. “So I like when you use it.”
“Hmm,” she hummed with a grin. “That’s cute,” she giggled.
“Don’t make me blush.”
“Hey love,” It was so shocking that Harry felt like his whole body stopped it’s auto-functioning. He was certain he stopped breathing. It felt like his heart nearly exploded out of his chest at the sound of someone else calling her “love.”
“Hold on one second,” she said to the phone. Harry wanted to die that she was going to respond.
“Oh sorry,” the voice said. Harry was bristling with anger at the interruption.
“It’s okay, what’s up?” Harry didn’t like that she thought it was okay that he was interrupting their phone call.
“I’m sorry to interrupt, I know you’re on your lunch,” Harry wished he could see him. He also wished to strangle him, but through the phone he knew it wouldn’t be possible. “But it’s an absolute shitshow in this meeting right now. We can’t add two numbers together to save our lives and we’re about to make your job a whole lot harder if you don’t help us soon.”
“Leave it to you to call on the accountant for math help—I appreciate you trying to make my job easier.”
“Who else would I ask, love?” He chuckled. Again, Harry was nearly sweating with how angry he was.
“I’ll be one minute,” she said and then to Harry she sighed. “M’sorry, Harry. I have to go.”
Trying to contain how frustrated he was by something that was not her fault was next to impossible. But he thought he managed well given the circumstances of how he was really feeling. “Oh, s’alright. I’ll see y’at home, kitten.”
“Bye, Harry. Love you,” she said it so sweetly Harry almost forgot that he was grumpy.
“I love you, too, baby,” he managed to respond feeling the anger slowly melt away because his love for her was so encompassing he couldn’t feel mad when he was thinking about her, let alone when all he felt was love for her.
But the second she was no longer at the other end of the phone call he was all out of sorts. It had nothing to do with her. Everything he felt was in direct response to the mystery male voice that called her love. She wasn’t his love. She was Harry’s and that was it. Harry knew she was being polite. For fuck’s sake he called most people he knew love. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary and it wasn’t wrong to do it.
But he didn’t like it one bit that someone at work, with whom she spent a large chunk of time with each day, called her some pet name. What was worse, Harry knew it wasn’t the first time he called her love, and it wasn’t going to be the last. Maybe if he was significantly older Harry wouldn’t care. But until Harry knew who it was, he was going to writhe in anxiety and simmer in anger.
Immediately after, Harry cancelled his final appointment—one that wasn’t dire, so he didn’t feel too bad for his client. He also knew he would be no help if he attempted to talk and listen with him. His mind was set on one thing, and he was lucky he had enough brain power left to drive himself home without crashing from lack of attention. It didn’t stop him, however from throwing himself a pity party all the way back to their shared apartment, sulking in how mad and grumpy he felt.
On a regular day, Harry typically got home after her so he never really got a chance to spoil her by doing the little things she always took care of without so much as a question of whether it would be done or not. He threw the laundry in the washer and reloaded the dishwasher so he could get started on dinner. He didn’t really know what to make but he figured if she didn’t have to think about it, that would be nice so he settled on one of her favorite pasta dishes that Harry loved to make for her.
He heard the door open about an hour and a half after he got in. He was sitting on the stool at the breakfast bar reading his book while minding the food cooking in front of him. “Hey kitten,” he called gently.
“You got home early!” She said with delight, and he was again so affronted by how much he adored her as she all but ran from taking her shoes off and hurrying to his side. He turned on the little stool and she pushed herself between his thighs wrapping her arms around his neck as she nuzzled against his body. He once again nearly forgot he was mad. He kissed the side of her head and rubbed his hand up and down her back.
“Cancelled with m’last client,” he murmured into her hair.
She sighed contentedly and nodded against his chest. “How nice,” she mumbled into his shirt.
“How was the rest of your day?” He asked.
“It was fine...um...we’re having a company party next Friday night. It’s at this fancy club and I’m allowed to bring you, so I wanted to know if you’d like to come.”
“I always like coming with you, kitten,” he said flirtatiously.
“Shush,” she giggled and shook her head against his shirt. Harry chuckled and kissed the side of her head.
“Of course, m’love,” he said quietly. He felt the anger return once he realized he wasn’t the only one calling her love anymore. “Y’said it’s fancy. Can I request y’wear that dress y’wore to the birthday dinner?”
“I’d be okay with that,” she giggled. “You sure that’s a good idea?”
Harry combed her hair away from her ear and pressed another kiss to her temple and nodded. “Can always sneak y’off into the bathroom,” he hummed into her ear. She shivered against him, and she shook her head.
“Don’t tempt me,” she mumbled.
“I believe that dress has a slit up y’leg that I like very much,” he responded. “Would be easy enough.”
“Stop,” she said. “Don’t turn me on if dinner is going to be ready soon. I’m hungry,” she reminded him.
He chuckled. “Yes, kitten,” he said and released her from the hug he had held her captive in for the last few moments. “It’ll be ready soon, go do whatever it is y’do when m’not here,” he said.
She wandered down the hall toward the bathroom as she called back to him. “You mean run around naked?”
“Now who’s tempting who?”
*
She noted that Harry had seemed much clingier over the week. Instead of their daily texting conversation around lunch time, he started video chatting with her instead. “Just miss your face,” he said.
She smiled at him and felt her face warm at his assessment. She liked it though. Everything about Harry made her feel so loved and adored. Being with him as a roommate was almost no different than being his girlfriend, save for, he was much touchier, there were more kisses, and of course there were a lot more orgasms. “I miss you too,” she said.
It was true. If she could, she would spend every minute with Harry. She was certain she would never get sick of him. She hoped that she wasn’t clingy, but Harry never had anything less than a smile. Even their arguments were silly—there wasn’t anything to argue about because everything was near perfect. (There was one time there was bug and Harry chased her around the whole apartment with it between his fingers until she cried—that caused quite a tiff but nothing a few kisses from him couldn’t fix.)
But Harry was rarely clingy. She had to be careful because the last thing she wanted to do was to overwhelm him. Seeing Harry acting clingy though...well it was nice. It was different and she liked the fact that she wasn’t the only one obsessed in the relationship. But it did make her wonder why he was acting this way. But not enough to ask.
Much like her friend’s birthday dinner, Harry was going to meet her at the party after he got out of work. In the same fashion as the day of the dinner, she waited outside patiently for Harry before entering.
“Hey, you coming in, or are you just going to stand out here all night?” It was her coworker as she headed up the steps to get inside.
She let out a breath of laughter. “Maybe,” she said sarcastically. “I’m just waiting on my boyfriend.”
“Oooh, the infamous boyfriend. Gonna break a lot of hearts in there tonight,” she said knowingly.
Tilting her head at her she blinked in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“Oh, surely you know that everyone in the office is in love with you,” she rolled her eyes.
Her jaw fell open a bit and she blinked slowly. “I’m sorry?”
“You’re hot, you’re smart, you’re nice, you’re exactly the type of girl these guys want to take home to mom,” she rolled her eyes. “They’re all hoping your boyfriend isn’t real.”
Feeling her face flush red, she didn’t really know what to say in response to that. “You’re joking,” she whispered instead.
She rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. Probably just a dick measuring contest. Although if I’m to believe social media, sounds like your boyfriend will win if he’s a sex therapist. Sorry for snooping but us ladies have to stick together,” she said. Seeing that didn’t quell the worry on her friend’s face she smiled gently. “Hey, I’m only kidding. Really, it’s totally fine. They’re all just jealous you’re taken, is all.”
Rolling her lips into her mouth she shook her head. “Maybe I shouldn’t go in,” she said.
She rolled her eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. You look incredible. You can’t not go in. It will be fine. You don’t have to stay long if it because a real issue. I’m sure your boyfriend can fend off a few finance bros,” she said knowingly. She pressed a hand on her upper arm when she still didn’t manage to assuage her fears. “Really, it’ll be okay. I’m sorry to have upset you.”
“No, it’s not your fault. I’m sorry. I know, I know. It’ll be fine. I’m just being dramatic.”
She smiled sweetly. “If you need help just send me a smoke signal and I’ll come up with an emergency,” she winked. “You’ll be fine. Please introduce me to your boyfriend I have a few bedroom questions for him,” she wiggled her eyebrows at her suggestively once more and fortunately that did make her laugh as she waved and headed inside.
Alone with her thoughts she paced slightly in front of the entry way. She looked at the menu posted outside the door in hopes of distracting herself. Reading the different entrees didn’t help much; in fact, she strongly considered calling Harry she wasn’t feeling well. Then, he wouldn’t come to the club, and they could just go spend their date night at home instead. It wasn’t that she believed they were all in love with her, that wasn’t something her humble self could imagine. But what she did believe: it would be entirely cruel to Harry to make him suffer through an evening that she anticipated being a fun date night where she could show off how cute he was when other guys were supposedly looking at her longingly.
“My God, you’re beautiful,” she spun around and smiled at Harry approaching her much like the last time. “Y’really gonna be the death of me in this dress, kitten,” Harry said wrapping an arm around her waist and kissed her cheek in greeting. “Did y’have a nice day?” He asked scanning over her whole body. His smile grew as he looked her over. It was amazing he had no idea about the apparent tumult that was about to ensue if she walked in there.
“Yeah,” she said and her eyes also, shamelessly, scanned Harry up and down. “You look...” she sighed and her smile grew on her face by the second. “Maybe we will end up in the bathroom.”
He chuckled and shook his head. “Don’t make it hard fo’ me t’walk in there, love,” he murmured in her ear and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. “Let’s go show off this dress before I rip it off you.”
*
Harry wondered if she knew everyone was looking at her. Harry was introduced to every one of her coworkers and they nearly paid no mind to him at all as they took in her ethereal being. The only one that paid any attention to him was her female coworker that had no less than fifteen questions about the bedroom. He took each one in stride because it was his corner of the world and he loved sharing his knowledge and advice about how to make things better.
“Well now that we’re close Harry, what can you tell me about stimulating the g-spot?”
“Jesus Christ,” she said putting a hand over her eyes. “Why don’t you take his card,” she laughed. “I’m going to lose my mind,” she said.
Harry chuckled and smirked. “I like your questions,” he promised her. “They’re good ones,” he assured her. “Sounds like you have a healthy bedroom life,” he winked at her.
“I like him,” she whispered to the sweet girl in the beautiful dress but obviously Harry could hear. “Bring him any time,” she said and gave her arm a squeeze and mumbled something in her ear before she flitted away to start some other conversation. Harry didn’t pay much attention to whatever she mumbled.
“She’s fun,” Harry remarked as they headed toward the bar to get another drink. Harry liked the way she held his upper arm as they walked. He loved having her attached to his arm; he thought they must have looked like the classiest power couple.
Harry wasn’t with her because she was beautiful—there were so many other important reasons why he adored her. The fact she was beautiful was the icing on the cake. Getting to show her off as his girlfriend was one of his favorite past times.
Especially when he could show her off in front of most of her coworkers who he already despised.
He tried. Really tried. He showed up with an open mind—he didn’t think about the guy that called her love the entire ride over. He was going to be good; he wasn’t going to worry about anything like that while he was with her. The last thing Harry wanted was to embarrass her at work.
But the second the two entered the room he felt every pair of eyes gaze at the gorgeous girl at his side. Naturally, she had no idea. Harry was grateful for that because as he was ready to lose his mind, she gave his hand a squeeze as she thanked him for being there.
There wasn’t a world in which he wouldn’t do literally anything for her.
“Oh loads,” she rolled her eyes. “I think we’re going to have dinner soon, thank God.”
“Y’hungry, kitten?” He chuckled. She nodded silently, sighing dramatically. He smirked. “Well, d’you want t’find us some seats and I’ll grab the drinks?”
“Are you sure?” She asked her eyebrows pinched together with worry. Worry about what, Harry wasn’t sure.
He nodded. “I think I can manage a vodka cranberry and m’own drink.”
“And find our seats?” She wrinkled her nose cutely at her own joke.
“Might be tough. Might have t’actively think ‘bout breathing t’keep m’self going.”
She giggled. “Okay, thank you, Harry.”
“Anything for you, m’love,” he mumbled and pressed a kiss to her cheek. With a squeeze of his bicep, she released him to go find a pair of seats.
Harry knew it was a risk to let her go alone but he hoped as professionals they wouldn’t turn this evening into an issue...and they wouldn’t turn into vultures. As Harry turned with the two drinks in hand he practically knew they would be all over her. There the poor thing was guarding Harry’s seat beside her as if her life depended on it.
Of course, Harry couldn’t come storming in like an idiot. So, as much as he wanted to run to her side so he could protect her—even if she didn’t truly need protecting—he casually sauntered over. “Here, kitten,” he said softly and placed the drink over her shoulder.
“Oh, hi,” she said and while no one else heard it, it made Harry happy he heard the relief in her voice. Harry sat down beside her squeezing her shoulder as he sat down. Effortlessly, she reached for Harry’s hand once he was seated and squeezed once her fingers threaded through his. She began introducing everybody to Harry, who all nodded at him respectfully, but Harry could see the competition in their eyes. He didn’t like it. Harry knew there was no competition. But it still made all the blood run hot inside him. “This is my boyfriend, Harry,” she said finally.
“We thought she made you up,” one of them snickered.
Harry forced a smile and nodded. “M’very real,” he promised.
She gave his hand another tight squeeze. “Oh, thank God you got a seat across from me!” The only coworker of hers that Harry enjoyed: the lovely girl who asked tons of questions. Although Harry prayed she wouldn’t ask any of them right now. He knew that their minds would only be on one thing—and that was the gorgeous girl beside him. It was infuriating how much Harry loved that dress on her and now he wanted her to be wearing anything but that dress—and not in a fun way. She directed a smile at her and Harry could see out of the corner of his eye that she was clearly uncomfortable.
“I see you all met Harry, I told you he was real,” she rolled her eyes.
“She’s got no pictures of you, Harry,” one of them smirked. “She once made up this imaginary delivery...so we couldn’t be sure,” he explained.
“I found that delivery, thank you very much. I didn’t see any of you running around the building trying to match the picture,” she rolled her eyes as she sipped her drink.
Harry smirked and shook his head as he sipped his own drink. Less is more he thought to himself regarding talking to all of the guys that looked at him as if he was the enemy. She seemed to relax a bit as her grip on his hand lessened as the seconds ticked by. Everyone was engrossed in a story and the upcoming Monday Meeting, so Harry was able to enjoy the moment even though he still felt a bit on edge. Dinner was going to be served at any moment, so they all took seats around the table.
Harry couldn’t help but notice how close the guy beside her was sitting. Beneath the table Harry felt her knee bump against his and she whispered a sorry under her breath. He gave her hand a squeeze and took another sip of his drink. Harry and she made small talk and eventually he had to release her hand so he could eat. It nearly killed him.
“Any trips planned for your vacation?” Her friend asked as she brought a bite of salad to her mouth.
“We’re doing a weekend down by the coast,” Harry answered as she was in the middle of chewing. She pressed the napkin to her lips politely and she nodded.
“A wine tour and just a day by the beach will do me some good,” she smiled.
“Oh, how lovely,” she cooed.
“There’s a really good bookshop down by the hotel you’re staying at,” one of the guys across the table said. Harry felt his muscles tense knowing they all knew where they were staying. Of course, it wasn’t her fault. Harry wasn’t mad that she told him; that’s what coworkers did—they talked to each other. He just wished with everything in him that they didn’t think she was gorgeous the way he thought she was. “The missus really likes it, and I know you like books too,” he said kindly. Harry felt his muscles relax a bit—the missus, this guy was okay. Fine, Harry could eat his pasta in peace now.
“Amazing,” she grinned happily. “Just need a coffee shop and I’ll be good for the whole weekend,” she joked.
“M’sure they’ll have one,” Harry chuckled.
“It’s impressive how much coffee she can drink,” this time it was the guy to her right. “If she could do it with beer she could compete.”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s not that much.”
“It’s at least three cups. You’re constantly doing Starbucks runs,” the one beside his eyes.
She shrugged. “I like coffee.”
Harry chuckled. “I’ll get you a coffee maker like the one in m’office,” Harry suggested quietly.
“Office, huh? Are you an accountant as well? Is that how you both met?”
This time Harry saw her muscles tense. “Oh, no...er...we went to the same college,” Harry said. “I studied psychology...I’m a therapist,” he said breezily. The girl across from them took a gulp of her drink and eyed the table suspiciously. The poor thing beside Harry knew that he was keeping specific details away from the people she worked with, and she was so grateful Harry just knew that he should do that.
“Oh cool,” he responded. “My mom’s a therapist. What’s your specialty?”
Harry didn’t miss a beat, as if he had planned on answering. “I deal with people who struggle with their relationships mostly,” he said.
“Do you like it?”
“It’s one of the best things I’ve done with my life. S’very rewarding,” Harry said proudly.
They all seemed to nod in agreement. “Not like here,” one snorted. It was a joke, because financial business was obviously completely different than therapeutic business. This resulted in laughter and fortunately got them away from the topic for which she was so relieved.
“Harry’s nice,” the guy beside her whispered.
“Mm, he’s the best,” she answered softly as she continued eating.
“Lucky guy he is,” he murmured. She ignored the comment. She didn’t want to start anything. But Harry saw her cheek turn one shade pinker. Beneath the table he gave her leg a gentle squeeze.
They just had to get through dinner and dessert.
*
Unfortunately, dinner turned into several drinks before dessert was even a thought. While the conversation was carefree and no one seemed to be having the dick measuring competition her friend alluded to, it was obvious that her coworkers had too much to drink. They were loud, rowdy, and definitely over the top. Harry graciously took it in stride, draping his arm across the back of her chair so he could squeeze her shoulder every now and again.
The conversation ebbed and flowed between work and leisure activities. Harry actually went to the same gym as the one coworker he did like (the one with a missus) and they had a good laugh about something that had happened to one of the machines the week prior. Another coworker also shared their affinity for books and recommended some titles for Harry which he took down in his phone.
But it was just as dessert was finishing that the guy beside her became a bit too much. It felt like it happened in slow motion, his arm knocking the drink over into her lap causing her to stand up instinctively making her own drink spill on her as well. “Shit,” he hissed.
She gasped at the coldness, the liquid sadly seeping into the beautiful dress Harry loved so much. But of course, all pairs of eyes were on her pretty chest where the coldness made her nipples harden against the fabric of her dress. Harry felt his blood burn through his veins again as the stupidly drunk guy started dabbing his napkin against her dress. “It’s fine,” she said quickly trying to brush his hand away and Harry stood as well, pulling his suit coat off and around her shoulders because he wanted to hide her nipples as quickly as possible.
They were practically drooling over her, and it made him want to murder someone, probably someone at the table, specifically.
“I got it, thank you,” she said politely as he continued dabbing at her dress. While his brain must have been foggy with alcohol, it wasn’t his fault it was the center of her dress that was ruined. Harry was nearly steaming as his hands started drifting over her thigh. She flushed brightly as she shooed his hands away again and Harry couldn’t take it, he lightly pulled her toward him stepping away from their chairs. “Enough, mate, she’s fine,” he said grumpily.
“Oh no,” she heard it from her coworker across the table.
“He was just trying to help,” one said rolling his eyes drunkenly.
“Shut up,” the only taken man besides Harry hissed back.
Harry took a deep breath trying to keep collected when all he wanted to do was throw something at these idiots. “Help? He ruined her dress?”
“I think he did us all a favor,” one snorted quietly.
“Oh, God,” she whispered again from across the table taking another large gulp of the drink in front of her.
“Oh,” Harry said flatly wrapping his arm around her tightly, so the opened front of his coat wrapped snugly around her, too. “Why’s that?”
“Harry,” she whispered and turned her face toward his chest, but she couldn’t look up to meet his gaze because he was busy glaring at the rest of the table.
“You’re a lucky guy Harry,” the idiot said.
Harry didn’t respond—he knew he was lucky. He didn’t care if she walked around naked in front of everyone, he knew she was all his, but he did not like the way they ogled her as if she was just something to be desired. She was so much more than that.
“Let’s go,” she whispered to Harry.
“Oh, come on, love,” it was the voice from the phone call.
“Don’t call her love,” Harry snapped.
“Harry,” she whispered gently again. She felt horrible—so horrible.
“Please don’t go; m’sorry about your dress. You still look gorgeous in it—I’ll have it dry cleaned for you,” he said. “Take it off and I’ll bring it back for you—”
Harry opened his mouth to say something, something not good she was sure, but she ignored it and gave Harry a hard shove toward the door as she snagged her purse off the back of her chair. Harry released his hold around her shoulders and grabbed her hand as he fumed, leaving through the door. In heels it was nearly impossible to keep up with Harry. “Harry, slow down please,” she whispered. He slowed barely, pulling her to his car. He opened the passenger door and nearly shoved her inside.
“We’ll get your car tomorrow,” he grumbled and closed her door angrily as he stalked around to the other side.
“Harry, wait,” she pleaded as he shoved the key into the ignition angrily. He was still fuming and she didn’t want him to drive if he was this mad.
“M’fine,” he snapped.
She was silent. With her hands in her lap the only comfort she had was Harry’s smell from his jacket wrapped around her. He sped home, breathing heavily, her heart raced at how tense it felt in the small space of the car. It was so quiet she wanted to cry. She felt like it was her fault and her whole body felt achy with worry.
Once parked outside the building, Harry gripped his steering wheel with both hands and stared out the windshield into the dark as if he could see through the darkness.
Eventually, she couldn’t take the silence a moment longer and finally spoke. Wringing her hands together, nervously. “Harry, I’m sorry,” she whispered. He remained silent, didn’t even look at her, which worried her more. When she worried—especially about Harry—she tended to ramble. “I... I truly had no idea they liked me up until tonight. In fact, until four minutes before you showed up. I’m so sorry. I never would have put you in that position and it wasn’t fair to ask you to come. It was so nice of you to do it. They don’t act like that in the office, I promise. I don’t...” she shook her head, tears filling her vision. She knew it wasn’t really her fault, but it felt like it and Harry not talking made her feel worse. “If I knew—"
“Y’can’t leave me for one of them,” he muttered and glanced down at his lap before looking out the windshield again.
She released a small gasp processing the words as they made it to her ears. “W-what?” She whispered.
Closing his eyes like he was in pain, Harry sighed. “Someone called you love when I was on the phone with you the other day,” he explained. “Made me mad,” he muttered.
She the blush flood her cheeks. “But—”
“I know,” he said without having to hear her thought process. He already knew what she was going to say. “It doesn’t make sense,” he shook his head. “M’sorry,” he mumbled. “Then...tonight. Obviously, I wouldn’t skip this for you,” he promised. “But...I couldn’t imagine you in this...” he finally turned to look at her and he scanned her up and down again. “I couldn’t imagine not being around you when y’looked so stunningly attractive,” he bit his lip. “They have every right t’think you’re beautiful—because you are, kitten. You’re...s’pretty. S’impossible to be rational. I can’t blame them for looking at you. For wanting me t’not exist. If I were them, I’d be jealous of me.”
“Harry,” she breathed. “But you are...you.”
He shrugged. “I know it doesn’t make much sense, kitten,” he repeated. "The devil doesn’t have anything on how temptin’ you are,” he smirked sadly. “S’not your fault,” he shook his head sighing again. “M’jus’... I’ve never been s’jealous in m’life,” he said looking back at his hands. She wanted to smooth out the wrinkle he made in his forehead. “I don’t like that other men know how beautiful y’are. I want t’keep you all t’m’self,” he murmured. “So...please don’t leave me for one of them,” he repeated.
“Harry,” she whispered.
“I know, I know, kitten. S’jus...” he sighed.
“Harry...I don’t think I could leave you for anyone,” she told him.
He smiled and turned to look at her. “M’sorry for acting like a jealous caveman.”
“They were out of line.”
“Doesn’t mean I needed t’act like that,” he shrugged. “I jus’ didn’t like the way they looked at you.”
She looked down at her stained dress, Harry’s coat draped around her, and she looked back toward Harry. “You have nothing to be jealous about,” she promised. “M’so in love with you...and...you’re the only one that can make me cum, obviously,” she reminded him.
He chuckled and rolled his eyes. “S’that the only reason y’keep me around?” He murmured. He sounded like he was kidding but she could hear the worry in his voice.
“There’s about a hundred other reasons before that, you silly goose,” she promised.
They sat in comfortable silence for another moment. “We better get y’inside and out of that dress,” he said quietly. She nodded in response.
Harry unclipped his seatbelt. “I hope that stain comes out,” he frowned. “You look extra beautiful every time I see you in it,” he reminded her.
She blushed and smiled as she turned from him bashfully unclipping her belt as well. “Thank you,” she said cutely. Harry gave her knee a squeeze.
“I also want y’out of your dress so I can make y’cum so hard y’would have ruined the dress anyway...They weren’t the only ones looking at your pretty little nipples when the drinks spilled on you,” he promised so easily it sent a shock of electricity all through the center of her body.
“Oh...oh...” she repeated herself dumbly as he came around to her side to help her out of the car. His eyes dipped down to the V of her dress and he watched as her nipples poked against the fabric once more. He smirked and brushed his thumbs over each one as he sighed. She moaned quietly.
“Better make sure m’the only one who continues t’make y’cum,” his voice was so warm and seductive it made her press her thighs together for some sort of relief. As he whispered across her cheeks and pressed his lips against hers, she felt every word he spoke surge through her body like an electric current. “Better do it, quick, too, huh, m’love?”
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always always thinking about your post that was like “normal has a very high threshold for being loved that is nearly impossible to meet and he will do *anything* to feel validated” and then today in the discord during the part where willy reveals it could’ve been either normal or scary, will said “willy fucked up normal would burn the entire world down for the tiniest crumb of validation” and just. screaming screaming forever about this boy’s inability to ever feel loved enough, he is every webweaving post about always devouring and never feeling full from love, this boy is RAVENOUS and it’s hard to understand how the oak good-boy morality can even supersede that, he has every trait imaginable to become a villain and it feels like the only thing preventing that is the desire to be good, bc tbh I don’t think he wants to be good more than he wants to be loved
SORRY FOR TAKING ALMOST TWO FUCKING WEEKS TO ANSWER THIS ANON!
Eheh, firstly *thank you* because this message is very sweet and made me extremely happy. The post you’re talking about took a good while to write and came with a lot of anxiety so it’s very nice to hear that you’ve kept fragments of it with you, I really do appreciate that!!! 💜
I’d debated for a bit on answering this privately to be honest with you, as not every fire I’ve sparked is one whose flames I wish to fan, so to speak, but everything you wrote is just so on-point and well-articulated that I couldn’t resist. Otherwise. *Ahem*. I know it's very very silly to respond to a response about an essay with what is essentially another essay, but you see, in thinking of how to answer your message, I got a little caught amongst many other things that have been on my mind... And I've seen some takes that have annoyed me for one reason or another and couldn't decide how to address those and. Well. Ultimately I decided that the stuff I wanted to talk about was connected *enough* to the stuff brought up in your message (as well as in my original post) that I could put it all together, soooooooo if you'll entertain me rambling once more~
Let's start by saying that, I recently saw a take going around stating that “Scary’s internal issues caused her external issues while Normal’s external issues caused his internal issues” (among a number of other statements that I frankly found pretty questionable), and I must say, for reasons that I hope to explain, I disagree with this assertion on both accounts!
In Scary’s case, this statement completely erases and undermines the trauma of her dad walking out, and what that does not only to her confidence and sense of self-worth, but to her relationship with her mother as well. And the degree of the impact of this external trauma on her internal view towards and treatment of herself is clear as day just by looking at the stark contrast between Terri and Scary. Scary (Terri) is someone who once had confidence in herself and could find validation and motivation internally, most recently evidenced by Terri's words of encouragement to Scary whilst under beacon of hope:
But then her dad leaves, and things get harder at home, and Scary starts to fight with her mom (her mom who she once called her best friend!!!), and she starts to feel worthless and unlovable- something that only gets worse with time as Willy alienates her from the rest of the group, case in point with this revealing exchange:  
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No one’s told her they’re proud of her in a long time (sound familiar??),
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her teachers at school shut her down when she tries to speak her mind or otherwise dismiss her behavior as “acting out” seemingly without any sort of intervention or attempt to actually check in with her,
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[the above teen fact is from episode 31]
Only then, in response to her diminished sense of self-worth does she begin to cut herself off from the rest of the world and from her former self, most importantly quitting soccer (which we know matters a lot to her!),
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and those things leave her even more vulnerable and supportless and ashamed. Not to mention all the mixed emotions she must feel when Terry walks into the picture, between actually liking him but not being able to see his love as genuine due to her relationship with her bio dad and all the frustration and shame she must feel as a result.
This is not to claim that Scary’s internal struggles do not inform a lot of what happens to her and the people around her over the run of the season- of course they do! (In fact some of the later things mentioned above are examples of that- I guess I got a bit carried away). But Scary’s major internal struggles that affect her throughout the course of the adventure are preceded by a slew of important external events that negatively affect her psyche and are in many cases out of her control. Scary’s internal struggles did not originate in a vacuum, and I absolutely would not say that they “caused” the bulk of what she has been through.
Unlike Scary, Norm’s excessive dependency on external validation to feel like he’s worth anything begins when he is very young. [Emphasis on “excessive” here, since obviously everyone requires validation from others to some degree, the point being just that this trait is so very pronounced in Normal and, as I argued a bit in the post anon is referring to, usually the most important factor informing his courses of action, superseding (but not implying the absence of) any desire to be good and help those around him. Will’s statement (the one which anon quotes) seems to corroborate this.] We know that things go so far back from Sparrow’s account in episode 17:
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It’s important that this is about Normal’s kindergarten experiences too, because it tells us that Normal’s predominant internal issues go back farther than this and hence were not caused in and of themselves by his peers- instead being perhaps more fundamental to who he is as a person.
This is not to say that external events do not exacerbate the state of Normal’s psyche. In his youth most notably, we can infer that he interpreted Hero’s treatment (which of course he did not understand at the time to be her training) as favoritism, and I think it’s pretty clear by this point that his resentment of her is tied to the degradation of self-esteem that he experienced as a result.
Then of course there is the dance. Sparrow’s words to Normal during the dance obviously consist of a very pivotal moment for Norm within the context of the season, but I think it’s important to remember and not erase the fact that Normal’s internal issues with validation do not begin at the dance, as established in the kindergarten case but also further exemplified by Norm’s primary motive in becoming the school’s mascot in the first place (to get everybody to like him). I think it’s important to remember this in part since it informs so much of Normal’s reaction to what his father has to say, immediately afterwards but also throughout the whole rest of the season. No kid wants to hear that their parent isn’t proud of them, but the severity of the response to this sort of statement is going to vary drastically depending on the person, and in Norm’s case, given his natural disposition, it’s devastating. [and I swear there’s a teen talk moment where Will says basically this but I can’t find it for the life of me rn damn it lol maybe I’ll edit in the clip later if I do]
Of course in this specific case, one can still mostly say that the problem stems from outside of Normal, and that his preexisting issues exacerbate his response but are definitely not the cause of it. Outside of this instance, however, this is not always true! In fact, Normal’s excessive dependency on external validation and related rejection sensitivity (negatively) inform a large amount of his interactions with those around him, particularly Lincoln and Taylor (imagine me underlining “Taylor” several times as I say this). Truthfully that’s a whole ramble on its own, but with respect to more recent events, I have to admit that I was genuinely quite irked to find a lot of people blaming Taylor and Lincoln for Norm’s response to their uh. mech shenanigans in episode 37, choosing to frame this as an act of moral failing or even malice on their part, rather than a reflection of Normal’s own issues and room for growth. Lincoln and Taylor were simply focused on the mission at hand, and there was no good reason realistically speaking to have expected them to be aware of Normal’s emotional state at that point in time (or in general, to be aware of the jealousy their bonding moments evoke within Norm- particularly when Normal consistently fails to communicate and address those emotions with them in a manner that is direct and not passive-aggressive). Lincoln in particular is very clearly stated as not even having fun in that moment, very understandably being focused instead on the fact that his friend Scary is around his father, who he just witnessed, you know, murder someone. This is not an instance of the world going against Norm for no good reason other than to put him through it, this is a very clear example of Normal’s internal issues affecting the way he perceives external events in a manner that is not actually very reflective of the reality of the situation, and which of course feeds in further to his cycle of self-loathing (and I won’t go into it here since I sort of did in the post anon is responding to- but Normal’s negative reaction to Lincoln breaking the pick to gain Scary’s trust is another important example of this [tbh all the more so now coupled with the hypocrisy of how he handles the anchor in Goofs but that’s a tangent]). As aforementioned, Norm also struggles a good chunk of the time to actually explain his feelings in a manner that is direct and does not rely on blaming others for not picking up on his dejection, as exemplified in how this discussion goes with Lincoln in the most recent episode:
The treatment from fandom of this whole instance being reflective of a reoccurring issue I tend to have with a large chunk of the fandom, wherein the collective memory of canon tends towards getting warped to account for Norm’s mental state. Sometimes that’s hailing him as some morally-perfect, emotional reincarnate of Henry (as though the pride layer didn’t happen, as though Goofs didn’t happen, as though all of Norm’s relationship with Taylor isn’t what it is- …I feel like I should stop implying stuff about the significance Taylor and Norm’s relationship and not elaborating but it really is an essay in and of itself LOL), other times it’s just downright turning everyone around Normal into a villain, a persistent phenomenon which I sort of illustrated in the above example but also touched upon in an earlier essay (arguing that despite the fandom’s quick jump to villainize him- Lincoln breaking the guitar pick would prove to be an act of love). Sparrow also takes a good brunt of the damage from this. Sparrow saying he’s not proud of Normal gets turned into Sparrow not loving Normal (despite an abundance of proof in canon to the contrary), his apology for what he said and the support he shows for Norm in light of his alternative plan on dealing with the Doodler are completely ignored by most of the fandom, as are any other demonstrations of emotional availability and shows of growth that he displays throughout the course of the season, and the true motives behind Sparrow’s insistence on Normal living a “normal” life- to protect him from the childhood that he but also that Hero had to undergo- is somehow framed as Sparrow actually holding some kind of favoritism for Hero. It’s as though there is a complete inability on a larger scale within the fandom to see Sparrow as separate character outside of the filter of Norm’s emotions, and the other teens (including Hermie) get a similar if less pronounced treatment.
[Actually, I would argue that to some degree all of the kiddads except Terry (and Lark since he’s not officially a dad) tend to be perceived and criticized predominantly through the noise of their respective child’s emotions/behavior. In Grant’s case, Lincoln 1. spends a good part of the earlier half of the season asserting that his dads are the best dads in the world despite everything going on and 2. has a very unfortunate tendency to compartmentalize and push down his negative emotions as much as possible- in typical Wilson fashion- so the complexity and severity of Lincoln’s issues with his dad generally go understated, and only now that Lincoln has begun to be more vocal and upfront about his issues has some of Grant’s parenting finally begun to come under fire, and even then mostly only his more recent transgressions. In Taylor’s case, Taylor’s emotional security/stability and general fondness for his dad mean that Nicky is being hailed by many people as “the best dad” where in fact Nicky- while certainly helping the teens out in many ways and perhaps even acting as a friend to them- has done just about jack shit for Taylor as a *father*, and really if Taylor has anyone to thank for being as well-adjusted as he is now, it’s definitely his mom! But I digress.]
Normal and Scary are very similar, but the way fandom treats them is very different. People (mostly) seem to be able to acknowledge that Scary, in spite of her mistakes and flaws, is a scared, tired kid with a good heart who is capable and deserving of love. In Normal’s case, I just can’t seem to shake the impression that the fandom (in general) would rather strip Norm of all the things that make his character complex, and nuanced, and flawed, reducing him to an utterly uninteresting husk of a character before depicting him as anything other than a perfect goody-two-shoes who has never hurt anybody in his entire life or daring to acknowledge the fact that “Normal has been through a lot, is hurt, and deserves a good support system and emotional validation” and “Normal can at many times be his own worst enemy, sometimes makes mistakes that affect those around him, and has room to grow emotionally” are notions that can and should coexist. Or at least, that's my two cents on the matter.
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juicefield · 1 year
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Meyp Skxawng - Neteyam X Avatar!Reader Part 4
A/N: My apologies for not updating the fic in so long, I was sick with some type of stomach bug and then had a really hectic week. I've also been suffering from writers block, so if this isn't up to par I apologize! Just been struggling with writing lately. Also I'm not sure if this was obvious but when reader is with the Sully siblings (besides Neteyam) she is speaking English, and that's why she talks a lot more casually then with others (not just bc she is more comfortable around them). As per usual feedback is appreciated! Also if you find any mistakes comment them down below or message me.
You can find the other parts here:
Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3
Although the writing in this fanfiction is my own, I do not claim any  ownership of Avatar, Avatar: The Way of Water, or any of the subsequent medias. All rights go to James Cameron and the producers. 
Synopsis: After a few week in your new body the Sully kids and Spider take you out into the forest for the first time.
Neteyam X Fem!Avatar!Reader 6.8k 1st person POV
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Y’know, Jake was right when he said that eventually everything becomes backwards when you have an avatar. Like out there is the real world and in here is the dream. I’ve only had this body for a few weeks and I already feel my sense of reality slipping from me. Time becomes blurred, days simultaneously feeling too short and too long at the same time. Every day I feel more and more like I belong out there, in the forest, and not here in the lab with Norm and Max. The first week was difficult, my new body weak and feet too pliant for the harsh peat of the forest floor. But, slowly, day by day I feel the calluses building and my muscles will themselves to go a little further. 
With the Sully children it's learn fast or be left in the dust. Hell, the first time I went to the forest with them I almost died. We had decided to take my first trip out, well actually out and not close to the cave entrance. Lo’ak led the charge and set out at breakneck speed and before long I was left behind with Kiri. Spider, Tuk, and him paid no mind as we disappeared from their view. Walking slowly, we were enjoying the forest's feast for the senses and Kiri turned to me with a strange expression.
“Why are you walking so slowly? You were faster on your first day.” She says, fixing me with a pointed look, even though she was clearly walking slower than me.
“Well it is a lot harder out here! I’m not exactly used to climbing giant tree roots and dodging excessively large plants.” I whine, annoyed that she dared to point out my slow speed. Stopping suddenly she spins around to point at me dramatically.
“Ah! Ah ah,” She tutted with a wag of her pointer finger, “you told me you were going to make the most of this opportunity. Taw, you are stronger than you think. If you want to thrive in this body, you must trust it. You have always been stronger than you think.”
While normally her words would have been extremely comforting I’m still sore about her comparison to my past self so I look to the side, pouting and refusing to answer. This only served to make her angry, which she quickly demonstrates by pulling harshly on my tail. Yelping in pain I open my mouth to respond before her fierce eyes train on me, quieting any verbal retaliation that I was hoping to attempt.
“(Y/N). Your spirit is very strong, and that is the most important part of someone. You have always been strong, despite your problems, and you need to realize that your outside now has that same strength. Trust your body. Here.” Kiri comes up behind me to place her hand on my stomach.
“Breathe. Feel the muscle, the bone. Feel its strength.” She instructs as I do as she says. Taking a deep breath I try to tune out the rest of the forest, turning my focus onto the muscles in my stomach. I feel tension rise in my abdominal muscles when she presses harder to illustrate her point. She gently removes her hand to grab mine and place it over my chest.
“Now, feel the heart beating here. Notice the sounds it makes. Your spirit lives here, and she is very strong. Feel how the strength starts there and flows down the rest of the body.” I gasp softly when my hand makes contact with the warm skin of my chest. I am surprised by the thunderous beat I feel below even through bone. It feels like the drum the people use for the many rituals and parties that take place in high camp. The beat of my heart reverberates through muscle and bone the way the air vibrates around the drum, taking the energy of the drum all the way to my little room in the lab. So too does this heart take this blood to my legs, imbuing them with life and power. As I focus on the beat I can start to hear it too, a distant thump in the blood of my ears. I don’t stop listening to its sweet rhythm until I am interrupted by Kiri nudging my arm. 
“Sit with me. I want to teach you something.” She commands me and points to a cleared area next to the tree we are standing on. I hesitate but ultimately decide to obey, sitting down on the soft moss and blades of grass that litter the forest floor.  Fixing me again with her intense stare she places her hands on her crossed legs and I mirror her.
“Oel ngati kameie. Do you understand what that means?” Kiri prompts and I almost roll my eyes. Of course I know what that means, I’ve literally heard it throughout my entire life, despite it never being directed at me.
“I see you. Yes, Kiri. It’s the most common phrase in the whole language, so uh- yeah.” I respond and look away from her eyes for a moment of reprieve from what I am starting to suspect is a lecture on ‘seeing’ myself.
“No. Wrong. Seeing is not looking. You do not understand because you do not see.” She says and flicks me between my eyes.
“Ow. Why are you flicking me? Of course I can see.” I whine and press two fingers over the spot she assaulted, massaging gently. She has had so many years of practicing her flicks on her brothers that her fingers are practically a deadly weapon at this point. I know that she doesn’t mean see like that, but I’m still irritated enough that I don’t want to give her what she wants. She hisses slightly and I can see the frustration on her face so I refocus and decide to actually listen to what she has to say.
“Taw. Seeing is not done with your eyes, it is done with your spirit. To see someone is to let go of the previous experiences you have had and to let them wash over you anew. When I say I see you, I mean the part of Eywa in me sees the Eywa in you. I see into you, your spirit and your kindness and I see the way we are connected. I see into you. I saw you when no one else did, and that is what I am asking you to do now. Do not see the forest as a dangerous place, see it as it is. It is the most wondrous creation of Eywa, and you are now a part of it. If you want to find a place in the clan, you must learn to let go of what has happened to you. You must also see your new self, to trust yourself as well as the forest. Do you understand?” Kiri finished the explanation with a gentle touch of her hand on my own. 
“I know but, Kiri, I’m not a part of this forest and I never have been. I can’t see because I am not a child of Eywa like you. I’m afraid there is no Eywa in me.” I speak my fear that I had been holding in since I took my first few steps in this body. The fear that I would be unable to connect with the world around me, despite aching deeply for a connection.
“Oh, (Y/N), you have always been one of Eywa’s children. You were born on this moon just like everyone else and Eywa’s heart beats in you as well. In fact, I feel that you may be closer to her than even some Na’vi I know.” Kiri comforts me in a soft whispering voice, looking into my eyes with tender sympathy.
“How? I can’t connect with her, I can’t visit the tree of souls, or even pray to her without feeling dirty and shameful.” I lament, shrugging my shoulders to try and hide how strongly the thought makes me feel.
“(Y/N), you don’t need those things to be connected with the Great Mother. I cannot explain it, I just feel her in you. Ever since you have been in this new body I have sensed that she grows closer to you everyday.” Kiri answers vaguely. I try to get her to explain, or at least to try to find words for what she feels but we are interrupted by the sounds of a branch snapping about twenty feet away from us. 
Kiri is immediately at high alert and brings a finger up to her lips to silence my many questions. My ear twitches at the sharp sound and I scramble up as silently as possible. Kiri nods toward a tree to our right and we both huddle behind it, looking around the trunk to where the stick had snapped. The hairs on the back of my neck start to stand when I see foliage rustingling in a way that looks like something is almost slithering through. Immediately I am sure it is a predator, I can tell by the way that the leaves shake that whatever is behind them is stalking us. Any prey animal would have run already, so we can rule out a yerik. Kiri is watching from the other side of the tree, gripping my forearm tightly with one hand and the other grips her hunting knife. We are almost stuck in place while the rustling comes closer, still skillfully hidden by the thick foliage. I can’t help the gasp that leaves my throat when a pair of yellow eyes locks with mine. 
“Nantang.” Kiri mutters as the viperwolf begins slowly moving forward, revealing it's hexapedal limbs one by one as it climbs over the stump it was standing on. I try to look away from the intense eyes but an invisible force causes me to stay rooted down. I am still staring at it when two other pairs of eyes join the first, causing Kiri to start pulling on my arm.
“They are out in the daytime… run! We must run, (Y/N)!” It takes only a moment before I am snapped out of my stupor and I take off after Kiri. The wind whips past my face as I jump over roots and plant, scrambling to catch up with Kiri. This causes the biggest one in the middle to come rushing after us, using its extra forelimbs to grapple over the ground around us. The wind is knocked out of me as the largest one slams into my back, its mouth wrapped around my tail yanking me to a stop and onto the forest floor. The next few moments are a blur as I wrestle with it, forcing my arm up under its throat to keep it from biting my face off. Kiri heard the sound I made when I went down and whips around, she shouts something but I can't hear her as the adrenaline has the blood pumping loudly in my ears.
Vaguely I register her calling out for Lo’ak as I wrestle with the largest of the viperwolves, its teeth sink into the flesh of my forearm and I cry out in pain as we roll over and over again. The other two viperwolves circle me and their packmate while Kiri yells something at me in Na’vi, but in my preoccupied state I can barely even  understand English. Eventually she yells one word in English. Catch.
She throws the knife towards me and it lands a few feet away. I use the arm that isn’t clamped between the viperwolves jaws like a vice grip to try to reach it. I stretch as far as I can go and my fingers only push it farther away from me. I strain against its gleaming fangs, which causes the flesh on my arm to tear slightly, but allows me to finally reach the knife. Gripping onto the leather handle I face the viperwolf. It releases my arm when my eyes meet its piercing amber eyes. The muscles on its face ripple as it lets out a loud snarl, fast as lightning it lunges toward my throat and my instincts kick in, sinking the knife up into the dip of its throat. It falls only a few inches from my throat and it thrashes a few times, horrific wet gurgling sounds leave its throat as I push it off of me. 
One of its packmates lunges towards me in retaliation, running on pure adrenaline I kick it squarely in its torso but before I have the chance to attack again with the knife now firmly in my grip an arrow whizzes past my face, landing in the torso of the poor animal. My gaze traces the arrows path and I spot Lo’ak between the trees. 
“Lo’ak!” Kiri shouts, and he readies his bow with another arrow, aiming it at the last viperwolf but it runs off after looking at its dead and wounded packmates. Lo’ak drops his bow to his side and runs forward toward us with Tuk chasing his heels. Spider follows a few feet away grabbing Lo’ak’s bow and calling out my name when he notices the crimson blood flowing down and pooling in several distinct spots around my feet.
“TawTaw are you okay?” Tuk says worriedly, rushing to my side and grabbing my injured arm. I wince and make a noise of pain when she grabs onto a part of the open gashes. She apologizes quickly and lets go, allowing me to hold the arm up to her.
“Yes, TukTuk I’m fine. It will scar, but nothing major.” I answer, my voice softer than I expect. Spider crowds around me and pulls my arm to him to examine it for a moment. He and Tuk ask a couple more times if I’m okay while I reassure them while her two siblings fuss in the background. Once he is sure that I’m okay he tries to lighten the mood.
“Yeah, Tuk. That’ll be like the coolest scar ever, right? Badass!” He says in an attempt to reassure her, placing a comforting hand on both our shoulders. I agree quickly and try to put a smile on my face to appease her. Before she can agree or disagree Lo’ak is storming over to us with an intense look of concern on his face. His eyebrows are furrowed and his mouth is in a downturned scowl when he opens it to speak.
“(Y/N). Are you okay? You need grandmother.” Lo’ak says, in a tone that's honestly more serious than I have ever heard him use.
“I can treat her, Lo’ak, like I said. She will be okay, many have suffered far worse.” Kiri assures him, placing a hand on his arm to calm him down.
“No! Grandmother needs to see her.” Lo’ak argues, eyes still wild with fear. I've never seen him look so scared before, and I saw the look on his face when he accidentally stuck Kiri with a poisoned arrow when they were just thirteen. He was really scared to go home after that, even though it was easily reversed with the help of Mo’at. I stand up, wobbling only slightly from my lightheadedness from my lack of adrenaline and the loss of blood. I  reach out to nudge his shoulder and he whips around to face me. Looking into his face he seems even more freaked out than I am at the moment. 
“Lo’ak I’m okay. Look I’m barely even bleeding, it will heal easily. And… thank you for protecting me.” I try to convey this while looking into his eyes. After I say this his ears droop and I can practically see the adrenaline leave his body. Again he surprises me with a fiercely protective hug, grasping onto my neck to avoid my hurt arm. I can feel his heart beating next to mine as I raise my arms to embrace him, enjoying one of his rare hugs.
“Okay. But, I still want you to see Grandmother. It’s not that I don’t trust Kiri to treat you, I just…” He whispers, trailing off as he lets go of my shoulders. Reluctantly I agree, knowing how hard headed he can be he will not let it go. Usually that would be just fine, but I didn’t really want the famed tsahik to know about how I almost got us killed by being dramatic about my new body. Tuk takes our embrace to mean it's time for hugs and practically jumps on me after he steps aside, carefully making sure to avoid my left arm. Silently I send thanks to Eywa for sparing my right arm, which is my dominant.
“We heard growling and Kiri yelling bad words. I was so worried.” She laments, squishing her face into my abdomen. Kiri steps back into the conversation, having sent the animals off to Eywa with a prayer with Spider trailing her like a much smaller shadow.
“We will head back. Grandmother will want to know what happened.” Kiri says, sheathing her knife back into its holster after wiping the blood of the creatures on a cloth. I can see Tuk visibly droop at this, obviously upset to miss out on a day of swimming and fun instead of the usual chores and training.
“No, Kiri, you go have fun with Tuk and Spider. Me and Lo’ak will go back. You rarely get time off, please enjoy it.” I insist and it takes a few more back and forths of arguing until Kiri relents and takes them to the intended destination, but not before rolling her eyes with a big fat dramatic sigh. While I had said the reason was because of Tuk and Kiri’s non-existent work-life balance, I really just wanted to talk to Lo’ak. He still seems shaken up from the attack and I want to address his worries in privacy away from his sisters and Spider, who would definitely tease him for caring so much about me. They have always thought it funny to tease him and imply that he cared for me more than a friend. I know that it would only make him more upset, causing him to retreat back into his tough guy shell. He needs a more gentle touch than any of the three can possibly provide him. While Lo’ak feigns being a macho unfeeling warrior he is really a sensitive soul. The trip back is silent and he jerks his head around at the slightest sounds, his body is rigid with tension like he expects something to jump out at us. 
“Lo’ak,” I start softly, placing a hand on his back and wincing when he jumps slightly. “Are you okay? We’re okay now. Tell me what’s wrong.”
“Nothing is wrong.” He responds curtly, refusing to look back at me. I sigh and shift my hand up to his shoulder, grasping softly causing him to stop dead in his tracks. 
“Lo’ak, c’mon, you know that I know you better than that.” I mumble softly and he finally looks back at me. I see a surprising amount of pain swimming in the depths of his eyes and his face sears itself into my eyes. With eyebrows drooping and his ears bending at and ears drooping lowly he responds.
“You could have died, (Y/N). If I wasn’t there you could have died. What would I have done if you had died on my watch? You have always been the only person in my life I knew was safe. The only person that I knew I could count on to come back to, the only one that this world couldn’t take. Now that you have this new body that isn’t a guarantee anymore and that… scares me.” He admits, looking away in shame at his words. My eyes sting as I realize what this is really about. My voice wobbles with emotion and my eyes grow misty as I try to respond to his words, struggling to find words that would comfort Lo’ak without dismissing his feelings.
“I know Lo’ak. This is scary for me too, but I need this. I can learn to protect myself. Hell, I killed a damn viperwolf! Shouldn’t you be proud of this meyp skxawng for that?” I finally get out, resorting to humor once again to avoid the big feelings that we are both laying out on the table. You see, me and Lo’ak have always been each other's constant. I was the only person in Lo’ak’s life that didnt see him as a fuck-up, the only one that he felt safe going to to cry. While we never talk about it (due to his usual attempts at stoicism), I have helped him through more than a few nights after Jake or Neytiri have really ripped into him hard. My joke seems to land when he smiles a little and nods.
“You are right. It was impressive that a useless baby like you could kill just one.” He says and his lips finally curl up back into their rightful place, into that signature smirk. I let out a faux offended noise at his comment and pushed his shoulder, telling him to shut up. I see the lines on his forehead disappear and can't help but mentally pat myself on the back for calming down my best friend. After a few more exchanges of friendly banter we continued on back to the clan, only stopping once when he let go of a huge leaf that flung backwards as I tried to stop it with my torn up arm without even realizing it. I got a few stares and sympathetic looks on the way through camp, but it was relatively uneventful until we stopped at the entrance of the healing tent.
I take a moment to prepare myself for what I am sure to be an endless barrage of questions. After taking a deep breath such as one would before jumping into water I step into the marui. Mo’at seems to be packing up some sort of tea into a small satchel. I catch the tail end of her instructions to the young man that looks to be not much older than me as he sits next to her, nodding dutifully along as Mo’at drones on. 
“... Let it brew for 20 minutes. Do not add anything. It is supposed to taste bad, you will deal with it.” She says looking him in the eyes and raising her eyebrows for a menacing effect. The young man looks away awkwardly and says thank you to her before shuffling out. Finally her eyes land on me and immediately go to my shredded arm. Her eyes slide back to mine and it's like I can feel palpable exasperation pouring out of them.
“Sit.” She commands and motions to the mat in front of her with the fluid sweep of her arms, adorned with a jeweled top that clinks as she moves. I gulp and hesitate before Lo’ak clears his throat, as if to tell me to hurry up. Hurriedly I sit down cross legged and hold my arm out to her as she greets Lo’ak with a hand, motioning down her face.
“What happened?” She asks, pulling harshly on the arm to adjust it so the light pouring in from the hole in the ceiling hits the still oozing wound. I try not to flinch as she turns the arm back and forth, trying to see both sides to assess the damage caused by the bite.
“Grandmother, Kiri and (Y/N)-” Lo’ak starts to explain before she cuts him off with the raise of her hand, silencing him effectively as the words die in his throat.
“I was asking her. Let her speak for herself.” She commands him and he shrinks back, going to sit in a darker corner of the marui.
“Well, Spider, me, Tuk, Kiri, and Lo’ak we’re headed out to one of the watering holes to swim and we got separated. They left me and Kiri behind and we took a moment to stop because Kiri said she had something she wanted to teach me. After we talked and meditated we heard a branch snap and then a pack of nantang jumped out and attacked us. Luckily, Kiri was faster so they didn’t hurt her. The biggest bit me and I had to defend myself before Lo’ak came and shot one of them…” I explain while she stares at me, showing absolutely no emotions, which only serves to terrify me. She says nothing so I continue rambling on.
“And I’m sorry. I had to kill one of them to stop it from doing this to my face instead. I do not know the prayers, so Kiri sent the animal off to Eywa for me.” I continue on before she raises a hand to stop me from word vomiting up more apologies. 
“How many nantang?” She asks, already pulling out some cloth and water to start cleaning each individual wound.
“Three. One large adult male and two juvenile males.” I respond, trying not to pull away from her harsh dabbing. She looks back to my face and tilts her head slightly, raising what would be her eyebrows in surprise.
“Hmmm.” She hums and I can feel my ears start to wilt under her scrutinizing gaze. “A sky person has not killed a nantang since Jake Sully. They do not usually attack in the day unless they are threatened. Did you threaten it?” She notes and starts grinding up a poultice to use on my skin, my nose twitches from the acrid smell so it takes me a moment to answer. 
“I think it was because I met its eyes. It was staring straight at me, I… I’ve never felt like that before.” I admit and she does nothing to respond except nod. Before long she is done with the poultice and starts to apply the goopy salve to my forearm. It stings quite a bit but I slowly relax into the pain, which is honestly not much worse than my normal days in my other body. While the burning pain is intense, it’s not anything I haven’t felt before. In fact pain is one of my longest friends, beating even the Sully siblings. She seems to notice and tilts her head inquisitively.
‘Does it not hurt? It is concerning if you do not feel the wound.” She looks at me expectantly and I shake my head.
“No, it definitely hurts. But I am very used to pain, so it does not bother me.” I almost mumble out my answer, trying to avoid her fiery gaze that is boring into my side profile.
“But you grew up in the lab, did you not? Why are you familiar with pain? Even my strongest warriors will complain about this salve.” She motions to the remains of the poultice in the mortar she used to grind it up, curiosity edging into her voice.
“Oh. Yeah, I forget that most people don’t know. My other body is… weak. There is something wrong with my legs, and they often cause me very intense pain.” I explain, using my hands to point at my blue legs. She chides me for moving my afflicted arm and pulls it back towards her to start wrapping it. She uses some unusual type of cloth to wrap around it a few times, securing the poultice to my skin.
“You are strong… for a lab rat.” She says in what I can only interpret as approval. Once again I somehow win approval from the hardest member of the Sully clan and my stomach feels like its flipping as I smile shyly at her compliment. 
“Thank you. And, thank you for treating me… and I really am sorry to have disturbed the balance of life without proper training, ma’am.” She waves off my worries, clicking her tongue in dismissal.
“It is fine. Now keep this on for a day and clean it thoroughly twice a day for a moon cycle. If it starts to burn or is hot to the touch, come back, or check in with Kiri. Now go, I must get ready for the returning hunting party. There is always an injury for me to tend to when they return.” She says dismissively, with such little expression that I cannot truly gauge her feelings on my actions in the forest. Lo’ak and I exit the marui, slowly shuffling out in tense silence. Once all the adrenaline wears off I realize I’m feeling pretty tired and just want to go home to my other body, this one is in sore need of a rest. Stopping Lo’ak I tell him I’m going home and thank him for taking me back, but insist that he can go now. He asks me a couple times if I’m sure and I assure him that I’m all good now and the walk back to the lab is very short. Finally he nods in agreement and we part ways. 
I take my time on the way back to the lab, trying to delay the inevitable scolding I will get from Norm and Max for my forest trip. As I stroll by the cooking area I take a deep breath, enjoying the scent and how empty camp is at this time of day. As I look around at the few people sitting outside I notice the screeching sounds of many ikran in the distance getting closer, signaling the return of the hunting party Mo’at mentioned. I walk to the edge of the cave mouth and watch the hunters as they return, noting how they all start lining up to carry the prey to the area where they butcher their prey. Among them I spot the tall figure of Neteyam. He seems to be instructing a few younger men and vaguely I wonder if he will be the one returning with a wound this time. I let out the breath I am holding when I note that his blue skin doesn't seem to be  marred by the crimson signature of an injury. 
It crosses my mind to wave to him or call out his name but I stop when he turns to one of the other young hunters and starts to discuss something with her. I continue walking past them and find myself sort of relieved at having successfully avoided him. We hadn’t really said more than two words to each other since our awkward dinner encounter. I’m not sure what it is but I just can’t bring myself to look him in the eyes since, unable to even think of how to apologize to him. What would I even be apologizing for, really? There's just something in those eyes of his that stirs something in me, they stir some part of me that I wasn’t even sure really existed. I’ve always felt like I am an animal in a cage, stuck, with everyone around me looking at me with pity and lingering distrust in their eyes. It is always one of the two. But when I look into his eyes, I feel like I am looking into the eyes of another animal in a cage all of his own. His duties form his own cage, making sure he does not take off in flight to get away from here. Much like me, many pass him with the same pity because of his harsh father, but instead of distrust it is fear that lingers after, fear of angering him or his powerful parents. However, when he looks at me it feels like he is seeing me, and me only, not my legs or my demon blood, just me. My pure soul untouched. Our cages fall around us, and there is only the other animals eyes boring into our soul. Such a tantalizing paralysis. I've never felt anything like that so it is obviously fucking terrifying to me, because I know that thought, that hope, which I will leave unsaid, is entirely impossible. 
I am lost in trying to find an apology for the next time I see him while I stand there watching that I don’t notice the first few times someone calls out my name. On the third time I hear it it finally registers that someone is actually calling out my name so I look around to see Neteyam waving me down. I hesitate for a moment and he waves a little faster, beckoning me to him as he waits by his ikran. Bracing myself for a moment, I begin slowly striding to him. As I approach I can see the agitated swing of his tail and the look of panic on his face.
“Hello, Neteyam. Is everything okay? Did something happen during the hunt?” I ask, finally sparing a quick glance into his eyes to see his reaction. His face morphs into a look of confusion and he shakes his head.
“No, no. I wanted to see if you were okay. What happened to your arm?” As he says this it makes me realize that most of the pain from the wound had actually subsided from the poultice. I will have to thank Mo’at for the care, maybe I will weave her a nice satchel, if Kiri can help me.
“Oh, yeah. Honestly I forgot about it for a minute, your grandma is such a talented tsahik that it barely hurts.” I offer up in response, too embarrassed to lead with the fact that I nearly got myself killed my first time outside of the Omaticayan stronghold. This only serves to make his grimace deepen and I can tell he is not satisfied so I continue on. “Your siblings, Spider, and I were headed to the swimming spot when me and Kiri got separated. She was helping me with some spiritual guidance when out of nowhere a pack of nantang attacked us, er well actually attacked me I guess. Luckily Kiri had her knife and Lo’ak showed up or I’m pretty sure I’d be running through a nantang’s guts right now.” His brows knit in concern when I finish my rambling explanation. “Oh, and don’t worry, I’m the only one that got hurt. Kiri was far enough ahead that they didn’t attack her.” 
“What? How many nantang? They do not usually attack during the day. Maybe I should warn father that there might be a pack of rabid nantang running around attacking people.” He says thoughtfully, rubbing his chin with his pointer finger and thumb. I can feel his eyes as they scan my body again to see if some new injury beside the one on my arm would mysteriously pop up.
“There’s no need. There were only three and two of them were killed in the fight. The other was scared off when me and Lo’ak defeated it's packmates. I doubt it will be back to the area anytime soon, and they did not seem rabid, just… hungry.” I say to try and ease the tensions that have gathered in his broad shoulders. I see them sink down for a second before perking right back up.
“You and Lo’ak? You killed one?” He asks and I get the feeling that he meant that he was impressed but the word kill instantly deflates any burgeoning pride I can feel. 
“Yes… I did not want to, but it was lunging for my neck. If I had hesitated any longer I would have…” I trail off and look to the side mournfully. I know that realistically Eywa and the clans members wouldn't blame me for my actions, but I feel like I've upset the balance of life in the forest without having learned the proper way of doing things. From watching Jake’s video logs I am aware that there are certain customs and traditions when it comes to the extinguishing of life in the clan. They did not even allow Jake to participate in hunts until he had proved himself as a member of the clan, something I have yet to do and have no idea how to accomplish.
“You need not worry, you were protecting yourself and my sister. Mother and father will know that and appreciate it, and so will the Great Mother…” Neteyam reassures me, and I let out a sigh of relief when he pointed out that I was also protecting Kiri. That’s definitely something that could help if Neytiri hears and starts to disapprove of me. I had only just gained her trust enough for her to allow her children to go places with me completely unsupervised. Plus it is a soothing balm for the guilt I’m feeling about it.
“I know, but it is still bothering me. I am not used to death and the flow of life I suppose. My world was so small, I feel unprepared for this huge new world.” I’m not sure why, but Neteyam makes it feel second nature to talk about the thoughts I haven't even shared with Kiri yet. Everytime I see him it’s like he does something to me that obliterates all of my self control and the waters of my thoughts flow through my mouth like rushing rapids. My normal defenses are no match for the charm of this gentle giant. Neteyam seems to chew on this for a few moments, gathering his thoughts into something easy to say. After a moment he places a large hand on my shoulder, something that seems to simultaneously ground and unnerve me.
“You will. You are brave, that much is clear to me. This world is large, but you will make yourself big as well. You have a desire to learn, and that is how you will do it. Learn well, Taw.” He responds and I am blown away by his confidence in me and the maturity of his response. Oh, and also the fact that he used my nickname. For a second it feels like he has stuck a live wire in me, electricity surging through me, making my heart beat loudly and my thoughts shift into overdrive. Placing a hand over my heart I try to quiet the cacophony of thoughts that attack me and I find myself saying a single word in question.
“Taw?” Is all I manage, almost breathless. Neteyam’s intense gaze falls and he starts to fidget, looking at the song chord at his waist. He fumbles with it to alleviate the nervous energy that is clearly filling him.
“Is it okay for me to call you that?” Neteyam asks, his voice unsteady and unsure. “It’s just… that is what my siblings have called you for a long time, so I thought you might like it if I also called you that. It suits you very well.” I cough a little from surprise and can’t help the smile fighting to show on my face. My tail almost wags for a second before I can still it.
“Yes. Yes, you can call me Taw… Just don’t call me TawTaw, Tuk might try to poison you. One time she tried to feed Lo’ak kllpxillw seeds after he called me that, even though they hurt his stomach. She is very protective of her special name for me.” I giggle as I tell the story, remembering the distinctly mischievous look on her face as she tried to hide the seeds in the dish they brought to eat at the lab with us. My story makes Neteyam let out a hearty belly chuckle, and he grins as he imagines the scene between his siblings. 
“Yes, she seems to be very protective of you in general.” He comments and opens his mouth to say more before a very irritated looking young man calls out Neteyams name from a distance away.
“Come on, man! We need help carrying these yerik. You can flirt with girls when you’re not on hunting duty!” He shouts across to us, his tail lashing back and forth in agitation. Neteyam’s grin drops and he rubs his temple soothingly, rolling his eyes at the voice.
“My apologies. That is my friend, Rinu. He does not have any manners. Thank you for the conversation, but I must go now. See you again, Taw.” Neteyam says his goodbye before setting off toward his friend. I let out a laugh at his friends before saying my own goodbye as he retreats. Taking a moment to recuperate from the second use of my nickname I start walking towards the direction of the lab again. Luckily I come back when Norm is out helping in his avatar so I am spared from one of his famous motherly sermons of being careful, instead I only get a small lecture from Max on the importance of being aware in the forest. He makes me promise to take one of Kiri or Lo’ak’s extra hunting knives next time before I lay down to wake in my new body.
A/N pt 2: Again thanks for all the love so far, and sorry if this part wasn't my strongest, I've been dealing with a lot so sorry if that same through my writing. Anyways I just wanted to share a piece of fanart I drew of Neteyam as Olo'eyktan while I had writers block. Enjoy!
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@skeletondeerart @jackiehollanderr @anxietydrogz @farleyis @soleilmoon
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bobbiworks · 6 months
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Beyond the Bell's Chimes | Part 4
riize ff: wonbin, eunseok, seunghan, sungchan, sohee, anton, shotaro, original characters genre: youth, romance, teen, fluff, angst, slice of life note: you can check my asianfanfics.com/jayxhobi for this story.
Ever since that day when a pebble accidentally hit Jiwoo's forehead, flung by Wonbin in a fit of frustration, she had been giving him death glares. Out of all the people in their class, it was this enigmatic, quiet girl who had barely spoken to anyone, despite several weeks having passed.
Seunghan couldn't help but notice the peculiar situation his friend found himself in.
"You've really gotten on her nerves, my friend," Seunghan teased, but Wonbin wasn't in the mood for jest and chose to ignore him.
Since Wonbin wouldn't divulge anything, Seunghan decided to step in and invited Jiwoo to accompany him to the cafeteria to grab some snacks. Jiwoo accepted and silently walked alongside him, ignoring the icy glares from the other girls in the class.
"What do you want? My treat," Seunghan offered as they stood in line.
"It's okay; I can buy something for myself," Jiwoo politely declined, but Seunghan persisted, repeatedly asking her what she wanted. Jiwoo, just as stubborn as Wonbin, refused to give in.
However, Seunghan persevered and waited for Jiwoo to state her order. He immediately paid for the egg sandwich she selected.
"I told you I can pay," Jiwoo protested as she tried to hand him her lunch money.
"I told you I'd pay," Seunghan replied, and he eventually prevailed. Jiwoo couldn't help but appreciate the gesture.
"...you insisted because you want something," she accused, squinting at him as they made their way back to the classroom. Seunghan nodded with an apologetic smile. Jiwoo sighed. "I knew it."
"Everything has a price," Seunghan stated, but Jiwoo disagreed.
"Most of the things we want have a price, but not the things we need to become human," she remarked, leaving Seunghan a bit puzzled as he tried to comprehend her words.
"Sorry, but all I want to ask is what's going on between you and Wonbin?" he inquired.
"He hurt me," Jiwoo responded, surprising Seunghan with this revelation. He began to contemplate what might have caused Wonbin to hurt her feelings, leading to Jiwoo's peculiar behavior towards him.
"How did he hurt you?" Seunghan asked, intrigued by the unexpected information. He contemplated various ways in which Wonbin might have caused Jiwoo emotional distress.
"He kicked a pebble, and it bounced back and hit me right in the forehead. Look." Jiwoo pushed her bangs away from her forehead, revealing a red, swollen mark in the center. "And you know what's worse? He didn't apologize; he said it was my fault for being there."
Seunghan was left speechless. He hadn't expected Wonbin to be so ridiculously petty over something so trivial.
"I'm sorry. Does it still hurt?" he asked.
"It hurts when I press it, but I'd feel much better if he apologized," Jiwoo said. "It's a simple sorry, so why can't he do it?" She continued, and Seunghan could tell that Jiwoo valued such simple yet meaningful gestures.
He smiled and gently pressed a cold can of grape juice against her forehead. "Keep it on your forehead. I'll talk to Wonbin and make sure your message gets through," he promised.
"You don't have to," Jiwoo protested.
"He's under my care, and he needs to remember the things I've taught him about how to treat girls," Seunghan stated firmly and proudly, causing Jiwoo to burst into laughter.
"You're so strange," she said, chuckling.
"Not as strange as you," he playfully retorted, making her laugh even harder.
Unbeknownst to them, Wonbin had been observing the exchange from a distance, wondering what Jiwoo had done to his friend to make him so kind to her. He didn't even notice the girl standing next to him until she spoke up.
"They make a cute couple, don't you think?" the girl remarked.
Startled, Wonbin turned to the source of the voice and saw Suyoung smiling at him.
"Jiwoo and Seunghan. Don't you think they look adorable together?" she inquired, but Wonbin remained unresponsive, maintaining his cold demeanor.
Suyoung accompanied him back to their classroom and initiated a conversation. "So, how long have you been playing?" she asked, reaching for his guitar before he quickly pulled it out of her reach.
"Sorry," he mumbled.
"About a year," Wonbin replied tersely, almost glaring at her. This guitar had been a gift from his mom, and he was protective of it.
"It's an electric guitar. I've never seen one up close," Suyoung added as she sat next to him. "Do you think I could play it one day?"
"Not sure," Wonbin replied, but his interest was piqued when he realized that she could play.
"You play?" he inquired.
"Yep. I have one at home. I've been playing for three years now," Suyoung disclosed. "Would you like to jam during lunch tomorrow?"
"Sure," Wonbin responded, experiencing a sense of excitement that he hadn't felt since arriving at the school. He didn't expect to meet a girl who could play, let alone one who invited him to jam during lunch. He was eager to tell Seunghan about this.
"Wow, you can really smile," Suyoung noted with a chuckle. "Okay, I'll bring mine tomorrow, and you can invite some of your friends to join us."
"Hey, guys, what's going on here?" Sohee, one of the kindest students and Suyoung's friend, approached. "Jamming with a guitar?"
"Yes, Sohee. Do you want to join?" Suyoung asked.
"Sure! But only if Wonbin is okay with it," Sohee said, giving Wonbin an inquisitive look. Wonbin couldn't say no, as he didn't want to miss the opportunity to play with a girl.
"Sohee's a great singer. Maybe you can join us for karaoke sometime?" Suyoung suggested.
"Karaoke?" Wonbin blinked, his heart racing as someone besides Seunghan had invited him to hang out.
"Yes, I asked Seunghan earlier, but he told me to ask you too," Suyoung explained, noticing the change in his demeanor. "I wanted to ask you as well, but I didn't know how, so I asked him first and sought his advice."
"I'll think about it," Wonbin responded, although his face didn't light up, leaving everyone feeling somewhat disheartened. Just then, Seunghan and Jiwoo walked into the room. When Wonbin walked out, Seunghan attempted to follow him.
"Hey, where are you—?" Seunghan began, only to be taken aback by the sight of Jiwoo following Wonbin.
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pancakes4two · 2 years
Text
3 times harry said the word “love”
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i mean it’s basically like a rite of passage to write something like this right??? will be off to new york next week to see harry so i wanted to post something before then 🥰 as always reblogs and comments are much appreciated!
preview: “What was that for?” You asked. The conductor standing behind Harry stops looking around the station and tucks his head back in the window, signaling that the train was going to leave soon.
“Dunno,” Harry says, trying his best to shrug with his hands still on your body. “You’re so cute. I love it.”
MASTERLIST | REQUESTS | READ MY NEWEST SERIES HERE
1.
“So how about that date?”
“Surely you’re joking?” You responded to the man standing in front of you. I mean, you had an honest right to be a little incredulous at his intentions. You hadn’t even wanted to come to this party in the first place; your best friend had just gotten a fancy new industry job in LA and you knew none of the people here. She had said it was going to be a small get-together, and practically dragged you out of bed to accompany her. You’re pretty sure Kaia Gerber just walked past you a few minutes ago, and now for some godforsaken reason Harry Styles is standing in front of you, leaning against the bookshelf you were trying to camouflage your body with, asking you to go on a date with him.
“Are you drunk?” You continue, watching as Harry crosses his arms in front of his chest in amusement. “Did your friends put you up to this? Spicing up the night with a bit or truth or dare?”
“What, I can’t ask a cute girl out on a date without getting interrogated anymore?” Harry yells over the music. Some old Tame Impala remix comes on the house’s speaker system and a group of people bump into the two of you as they rush to the living room to dance. You look at Harry with a deadpan expression and cross your arms to match his stance. He’s infuriatingly tall, you realize as you tilt your head up to look him in the eyes, unimpressed.
Twenty seconds into your staring contest, Harry breaks the silence between you with a laugh. “For what it’s worth, I’m completely sober. I don’t drink when I’m touring. Not a fan of truth or dare either, at least not when I haven’t even had one drink yet. And I’d really love to grab dinner with you before my show on Saturday.”
The singer smiles at you as you consider his offer. You had to admit that he was attractive: you’d seen him enough times on magazine covers and your friends’ Instagram stories to understand that he was hot. And surprisingly sweet, with the way that he just tried to ask you out. You’re also fairly sure that your best friend would never let you live it down if you turned him down. Fuck it, you think, what do I have to lose?
You pull your phone out of your purse and hand it to Harry, with the screen opened on your Messages app. “Don’t give me your work number,” you joke, watching him type his digits into the top of the screen. Harry smiles at that, then sends himself a text using your phone. When his own device pings with a notification, he unlocks it and saves your contact.
Right then, a guy with bleached hair pulls on Harry’s arm and starts dragging him towards the living room. “You gotta come here, H, they’re getting them to play ABBA and we need your voice on the floor.”
Harry laughs as his friend continues to lead him further and further away from you, his feet shuffling against the hardwood floor as he hurries to catch up. Right before he turns the corner, he looks back at you, his hair slightly messed up and his eyes sparkling with excitement. 
“Thanks, love!” He yells over the crowd, giggling when his friend pulls on his arm harder. “See you Saturday!”
2.
“Fuck, Jeff is going to kill me,” Harry says when the two of you finally make it to the train station. You’d lost track of time during your date and now he was fifteen minutes late to his own show. Since it was the evening, LA traffic was in full swing, and the metro was his only hope for making it to the venue on time to take the stage after his opener.
“You sure you can’t come with me?” He asked you, hurriedly trying to add a metro card to the wallet on his phone. The two of you watched as the screen loaded slowly.
“I want to, but I don’t really feel like seeing our faces on a gossip site tomorrow morning,” you said sheepishly, “and I was kind of looking forward to having a quiet night in.”
“No, you’re right,” Harry said, “but I have to say a night with me is much more preferable than your bed and ten episodes of a Netflix Original.”
“Shut up,” you laughed, shoving Harry in the chest. His t-shirt was soft and worn, which made sense since it clearly seemed to be a vintage tour shirt for a band you didn’t recognize.
Harry’s card finally loaded and he used it to get through the turnstile. You followed closely behind him, since the train you took to get home had a stop at the same station. You checked the transit app on your phone: the next one was coming two minutes after Harry’s train.
Harry stepped on the train as soon as it pulled up, the tracks leaving a gap between your bodies. His limbs were long enough that he could rest his hands on your shoulders as the train stalled. “Did you have fun on our date, or are you still convinced it was a prank?”
You raised an eyebrow at him, feeling a warm sense of comfort from his touch. You thought you saw a girl pull her phone out in the corner of your eye, her camera obviously directed towards the two of you. Harry notices this motion too, glancing at her briefly, then returning his attention to you. He doesn’t seem to care.
“You’re probably going to have to take me out on another one before I decide,” you flirt back. Harry’s eyes light up in challenge, and he looks down at you in amusement, the corner of his lips quirking up in a playful grin. He smells like clean laundry and lavender. Removing one hand from your shoulder, he squishes the tip of your nose.
“What was that for?” You asked. The conductor standing behind Harry stops looking around the station and tucks his head back in the window, signaling that the train was going to leave soon.
“Dunno,” Harry says, trying his best to shrug with his hands still on your body. “You’re so cute. I love it.”
You roll your eyes at him playfully and the train moves forward ever-so-slightly. Startled by the movement, Harry suddenly cups both sides of your face with his hands. He presses a kiss to your lips, and it’s so brief and gentle that you don’t register what just happened until after he pulls away.
You open your eyes and Harry is smiling at you from six feet away, his train pulling away from the station. Your hair whips around in the wind and he waves at you, one hand pressed to the glass window in the middle of the doors.
“See you soon,” he mouths, and you stand there dumbly until your train arrives, wondering what the hell just happened.
3.
“Styles.” You said seriously, pinning your boyfriend down into the couch. The two of you were sitting in his green room, trying to pass the awkward amount of break time that he had between soundcheck and when he actually had to be ready and dressed for stage. “What did you just say?”
“Nothing,” Harry replied defensively. “You heard nothing.”
You pressed his arms deeper into the couch, kneeling on both sides of his body. The loose front strands of your hair dangled above him, and Harry tried to swat them away, blinking rapidly as they brushed against his face. You laughed and grabbed the hood of Harry’s sweatshirt out from under his body, then pulled it over his hair. You reached for his hoodie strings and tightened them, the fabric closing over Harry’s face so that only his nose and lips remained in view.
“Y/N,” Harry tried to reach for you, but he couldn’t see and had terrible accuracy. You tied the strings of his hoodie in a large bow, then leaned back and admired your work. You looked at your boyfriend as he tried to untie the knot, his hands fumbling around in the air as if he were a baby. Here you were, traveling the world with the boy you loved, (although he didn’t know that just yet.) It was strange how much your life had changed in six months, all because of a party you almost didn’t go to.
“Tell me what you said and I’ll let you go,” you said, flopping your body on top of Harry’s. You rested your chin on the top part of his chest so you could look up at him. He looked impossibly cute all wrapped up in his sweatshirt.
“IsaidIloveyou,” He mumbled.
“What?”
“I said,” Harry enunciated clearly, slowly dragging out the syllables. “I love you.”
You giggled, then pulled at the ends of one of the strings in order to untie the knot. You grabbed both sides of the hood, pulling at them lightly to loosen it. When Harry’s face finally appeared out from under the fabric, he grabbed at one of the decorative pillows on his side and threw it at you.
“You’re not gonna say it back?” He pouted at you, his hair now adorably messed up. You pulled the pillow he just threw at you into your lap and looked at your nails, making a show of ignoring him.
“Babeee,” Harry whined, pushing you up against the other side of the couch. You laughed again and threw an arm over his shoulder, twirling your fingers around the curls growing behind his ears.
“I love you too.”
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khaleesiofalicante · 2 years
Text
“I like it,” Alec said as he inspected the coffee maker and the small box next to it. “What are these?”
“Coffee beans from Colombia,” Magnus informed as he walked up to Alec. “I think they would appreciate it.”
Alec  managed a small smile. 
After the Dark War, Aline and Helen had been ‘sent’ to Wrangle Island to ‘study’ the wards. 
They all knew it was exile. They all knew it was punishment. But no one really spoke about it. 
No one really spoke about a lot of things. 
Alec’s eyes drifted over to Magnus, who was feeding Chairman Meow. 
It has been a few weeks since their return from Edom. A few weeks since their talk. 
Magnus promised to be more forthcoming. Alec promised to be more patient. 
They both promised to try again. To try harder. 
But there was much to talk about. 
Magnus had trusted Alec with his past. Some of the things Alec read in the book Magnus had given him led to more questions than answers. 
But even in the book, some things were simply not there. 
Some things, as Magnus said, were too difficult to talk about. 
So, Alec didn’t push. 
He had pushed before and he had lost his Magnus. He didn’t want to make that mistake that. 
It was just that…Well, it was kind of obvious that the whole thing was bothering Magnus too. 
But they both ignored the elephant in the room. 
“I have to go back to Idris today,” Alec told the warlock. “My father wanted to talk about the future of the New York institute or something.”
Magnus hummed. “Sounds important.”
“He’s been trying to give me more responsibility,” Alec sighed. “Not that I’m ungrateful or anything. It’s just, well, I could do with a break.”
Magnus grinned at that. “Would you like me to whisk you away to Europe again, Alexander?”
“Maybe somewhere else,” Alec chuckled. “Asia? I’ve never really travelled there.”
He has never really travelled anywhere. Until Magnus. He has never really done anything. Until Magnus. 
It was funny how one person could change your whole life. Every single part of it. 
A fire message fell on his lap. Alec sighed. “It’s my dad.”
“Dads are the worst,” Magnus huffed, and then tensed up immediately. Then he put on a smile. “It’s alright, my love. Go. The Chairman needs a bath anyway.”
Alec nodded. He pressed a kiss to Magnus’ lips and got off the couch. The warlock made him a portal. But Alec couldn’t bring himself to walk through it. 
Don’t push. Don’t push. Don’t push. 
“He really was the worst, wasn’t he?” Alec heard himself ask. 
Magnus looked away. “I’d rather not talk about it, Alexander.”
“Him, you mean?” Alec clarified. “Asmodeus?”
Asmodeus. 
The Prince of Hell. A fallen angel. 
Magnus’ father. 
Alec had only found out in Edom. He had not talked to Magnus about it since. No one did. 
“Perhaps you should leave,” Magnus gestured at the portal. 
“Do you have me to go?” Alec asked. 
Magnus didn’t respond. 
Alec walked back to the couch and sat down next to him. “If you don’t want to talk about it, then we don’t have to.”
“It’s not that I don’t,” Magnus sighed. “It’s just…I’m-”
“You’re what?” Alec asked.
“I’m scared,” Magnus whispered. 
Alec blinked. “Scared of what?”
Magnus sighed deeply. “I’m scared that you’ll leave me.”
Alec chuckled. “Magnus, I already know you’re his son.”
“But what if closure-”
“I didn’t ask for closure. I asked if you wanted to talk about it,” Alec corrected. “I’m not going to leave you for talking about your feelings, Magnus.”
“You might leave when you find out what I am,” Magnus said. 
“What you are?” Alec echoed in confusion. 
Magnus inhaled and held the feline tightly for comfort. “I’m called an Eldest Curse. It refers to the oldest living child of a prince of hell.”
“Oh,” Alec said. “Are you different from other warlocks?”
“In some ways,” Magnus nodded. 
“Are you more powerful?”
“In some ways,” Magnus nodded again. “I was not so powerful in Edom as you might recall.”
“Right,” Alec said. “Well. Okay. So, you’re an Eldest Curse. Thank you for telling me.”
“That’s it?” Magnus blinked. 
“Baby,” Alec chuckled. “I don’t know what else you want me to say.”
“I’m an Eldest Curse!” Magnus said incredulously. 
“You’re Magnus,” Alec reminded him. “You’re the High Warlock of Brooklyn. You’re my boyfriend.”
And one day, you will be my husband. 
“But my father-”
“He doesn’t define who you are,” Alec shook his head. “Just as mine doesn’t define who I am. We are more than our blood, Magnus. Isn’t that what we learned in the last few months?”
Magnus gave a small nod.
“And I don’t know why you were so worried about telling you are super powerful. It’s super hot.”
Magnus rolled his eyes fondly. “Stop it.”
“It is,” Alec insisted. “I hope it’s not offensive to say that.”
“It’s not,” Magnus huffed. “Not when you say it.”
“Are there others walking around and calling you super hot?” Alec frowned. 
“Many others,” Magnus winked. “What can I say? I’m in high demand. Despite being a curse and all that.”
Alec smiled and took Magnus’ hands into his own. He lifted it slowly to his lips and gave it a gentle kiss. 
“You are not a curse,” Alec said softly. “You are my dream true.”
Magnus shook his head fondly. “You are a sap, Alexander.”
Alec smiled. “Will you tell me more? About how you met him? When did you find out?”
Magnus smiled back. 
He talked. 
I’ve always wondered how this conversation went. So, here is my take on it. 
For @malectober. Prompt: Curse
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wannaeatramyeon · 9 months
Note
hihi!! i thought this was funny and wanted to tell you😭
i was telling my friend about Goo and how i would absolutely marry him and they said that he needs their blessing. i asked what he can do to get their blessing and they said he needed to write them an essay about how much he loves me so, to entertain them, i wrote them an essay from Goo's perspective about why he wants to marry me with a 20 minute timer. it was 584 words in the end and I worked a miracle.
Moral of the story: Goo got the blessing😭so uhhh you can always write your way into someones life??
This tickled me, just imagining the unhinged ramblings from Goo POV mixed with your own. Drop it please.
Inbox clearing time! Non fic requests answered: 6. (Check it - plus my fave Lookism arcs!)
To the non-anon anon that I have not included and I don't know what to do with your message - No, I won't hold your hand while you poop. Good luck with that.
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Really?? I feel so... unhinged and nonsensical (even more so than usual) when I rant. Seriously thank you for reading!?!!?
PTJ did somewhat write women with more of a personality in his Life As A Loser Series so it seems more of a shame that he's lost his touch and catering much more towards teenage boys with his current series.
Which. Fine. Action manhwa - great. BUT if your target audience are teenage boys then yknow, wouldn't it be even BETTER to write some strong badass women so these impressionable youngsters realise that not all girls need saving, and oh look. Girls are human too. With their own ambitions and flaws and imperfections, just like everyone else.
If you must make them simp, form a harem. Also. FINE. At least give them something beyond that.
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Hey Black Anon! Sorry again for how long it took me to respond to your ask before, and hope it's going much better for yourself since your last request.
I'm muuuuch more responsive with DMs so if you ever wanna come out of anon - come shout at me in my DMs!!
HTF s2 is really... something. Completely lost the meaning of HTF and Viral Hit. Don't blame you for dropping it. Alas, the Taehoon grip on me is still going STRONG.
LOL. Me in a similar position, wondering if I should get into JJK.
Can I... recommend some of my fave arcs if you ever do decide to read Lookism? The ones I like are generally more story driven.
Vasco's backstory (prepare the tissues) - 52 - 57
Johan + Zack + Mira backstory (cult warning, another sad arc) - 132 - 138
Goddog (another pretty sad arc with Johan) - 199 - 213
Jacedichi Files (silly crime solving with Burn Knuckles) - 215 - 218
One Night (Johan + Jace!! Fun action) - 258 - 262
Jake Kim (PLEASE READ THIS IF NOTHING ELSE) - 302 - 318
Workers (2A) (Rescuing Sinu. Honestly, I cry almost every time. Read Jake Kim's arc to appreciate this!) - 372 - 392
Let me know if you ever get into it!!!
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Me??? Mine????? I cannot write that guy so thank you - that means A LOT to me! I will try harder to write a decent Eli (that doesn't devolve into ranting about his current direction).
Thank you for reading and being so friggin CUTE!! 💖
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I feel a vaguely threatening tone from this.
Like something Goo would recite before walking into a darkened warehouse with a crowbar 🤔
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Baby there's nothing noble about this, but it is actually more satisfying than my normal job lol (lolling through tears).
Thank you so much for reading!! My single braincell has been firing quite well with these ideas.
Anon. Honestly this is adorable, I've screenshat this for a pick me up ahhhhhhh 🥹
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My dear 🕊️ anon, thank you for reading my DG fic! I also feel very little for DG but I will admit I am coming around to him.
YES!!! I LOVE the idea of someone getting close to James Lee in his younger years, and him being soft for the reader.
And then I also like angst so let's bring those 2 things together. Heh.
Eeeee I also added that Remember fic to my list of faves that I have written.
Please. I also have a list of fictional men I am unwell over. Let's start a support group! 🫠
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mrthful · 9 months
Text
Hey yall, this is a long time coming, and this is how ill address it TW drugs mostly
I know ive been gone for some time, on and off posting, and not responding much to dms. i want to tell yall that my intention isnt to run away or scam yall at all. things have been really difficult, so heres whats happening
My partner and i recently split up, and its honestly been a long time coming. our relationship had been steadily going down hill for a while, and it effected my overall motivation to do pretty much anything, like draw for myself, let alone commissions. theres been constant drinking and c*ke around me that ive been so extremely uncomfortable with, as well as being lied to, cheated on, and just so mentally unwell with my own depression, anxiety, and resurfacing trauma, that i couldnt tell what was true and what wasnt, with the constant lying and sneaking around and just everything, the entire environment i was in
it was harder since i was going to work so much that i never had true time for myself or to really work on things, and everything was so overwhelming for me since i couldnt take any breaks from work since my ex partner had just taken off work for a long time to drink, and i was pretty much the only one responsible for paying bills and trying to feed myself and partially feed the 3 other people with us.
i currently cant even live in my own apartment and dont have most my stuff, so im also readjusting to everything thats changed as well as finding a new job
i still need time before i can fully come back and finish up commissions, and i thank you for your patience, im really trying to get back into the groove of my life and move past everything, but its very difficult so itll take me some time, but i really would like to come back and continue making art and friends
i do have a full list of all owed art, if youd like to message me you can, but i most likely dont have an update for you, im doing my best to move past this and bring yall stuff to look at/what i owe
i just hope that yall can understand why ive been disappearing and re appearing over the past year, and i love anf appreciate the little community i have. out of all the things ive lost over the past year and a half, i definitely dont want to lose yall. ill see yall soon though, dont be afraid to message me!
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maiji · 6 months
Note
Lenormand reading request (thanks for doing these, it's a great idea and I'm really interested to see how they work!):
I'm working on changing some of my habitual / automatic ways of thinking, but - as fully expected - it's not easy. What should I bear in mind when taking on this challenge?
Numbers: 19 and 23
I really appreciate this question, and find it so relatable!
With that in mind, I will note as a general comment for anyone getting any kind of reading done that the person doing the reading (in this case, me) will invariably bring their own experiences into it. These are interpretations, so they will be filtered or coloured by the mind interpreting them in some way, no matter how much they may try to be impartial/neutral. It's not a bad thing per se, but just something to be aware of. So if anything doesn't feel relevant to your own experience, always feel free to use it as a jumping point for making insights that feel more applicable and more helpful to you. It's your question for your situation, so you may find connections other people may not even be aware of.
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#19 was The Letter, and #23 was The Snake. This one is extra interesting to me because it is also the combination (albeit in a different sequence) that I drew in one of my Reading Examples for a totally different question, which you can see here (do a search for the phrase "Snake + Letter" to find it quickly). So it offers a convenient comparison to see how interpretations are tied to context.
The Letter is about communication, and The Snake has a variety of possible meanings. A lot of them, especially the traditional meanings, can appear to be very negative (poor little Snake!) but I personally find that's surface-level - it's easier for us to remember things that are extreme, and from there we can find more nuanced interpretations. Some of the modern associations include desire and single-mindedness.
I'm grateful that the first card drawn was the Letter, because in this situation it seems to be the more "obvious" read - very easy to connect it to the nature of the question. This is about your habits and ways of thinking, so a possible interpretation is communication with yourself. Awareness of what you're thinking or doing when you are doing them is a very immediate first step in being able to change course - if you want to change it, of course.
And that thought helps me to find a relationship with the Snake. Here I'm focusing on those modern meanings. There are a few directions we can look at it from, but one that strikes me is that sometimes the more we want something, the more we beat ourselves up over our perceived failure to achieve it... and the harder that can make it for ourselves. It reminds me of this video that's floated around the internet for a while and reappeared on my Mastodon feed the other day, of a man punching a Non-Newtonion fluid. This type of matter changes viscosity based on pressure - in this case, solidifying. So his forceful punch met a hard surface and resulted in a reaction of pain, whereas a gentle touch sank through with ease.
These are fairly abstract and metaphorical interpretations, so I often find it fun to see if I can do a more literal reading too. That can sometimes yield surprises and more ideas. For example, The Letter is also writing. Thoughts are nebulous and can be hard to grasp - they come easily and go just as easily. Words you can see and reflect on in a more tangible way, and that could be an assistive device. What if you wrote a letter to yourself, messages of encouragement and/or reinforcement? How about little reminder notes of the positive, and things you want to do more of, focusing on that over the negative/things you want to do less of?
One of my friends keeps a daily journal to help manage and respond to thoughts and habits. I'm not nearly so diligent in this area, but I've written letters to myself using FutureMe. It can be easy to feel like I'm making no progress minute by minute, day by day, so seeing a message from Past Me has often helped me to reinforce what and why I do what I do, and to be able to see my journey over a period of time has been super powerful.
I hope this provided some interesting food for thought!
--
Thanks for requesting a limited time free reading to celebrate the new edition of the Fortune Lenormand oracle/art deck!
Want to dive deeper?
Fortune Lenormand oracle/art deck - there's a free downloadable overview of card meanings!
humangray.com/lenormand - more info and resources/links!
(Note: these readings are being done with my old card deck from the original printing. There's not much difference with the new edition available in the link above - the biggest one is that the new edition has a custom box ooh ahh!)
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Text
Prominence [WCh. 2.61]
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Social Media AU ; Idol AU ; Added Unit AU CW/TW: Language Genre: Comedy, Romance Pairing: NCT x Idol!Reader, Seonghwa x Reader Y/N Pronouns: Female (She/Her) Word Count: 3.4K
(WCh. 2.61/?) [First] | [Previous] | [Next] [NCT Masterlist] | [Other Groups Masterlist] | [Prominence S1 Masterlist] | [Prominence S2 Masterlist]
Notes: Huhu, I was able to squeeze in two characters I've been wanting to hehe Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.
Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!
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25 February 2022
Seonghwa woke up as soon as Mars had licked his face.
"Urgh... Mars, don't do that," Seonghwa wipes his face with his hand and sits up. Mars barks next to him and Seonghwa rubs his eyes, watching Mars stand up against his nightstand, he pushes his phone towards him. Seonghwa picks it up, squinting to read the message on it. "Yangyang? What does he want?" Seonghwa yawns.
Night Bowl. Tonight. 10 p.m.
Seonghwa's brows furrowed, naturally, he knew the location, he'd been to your aunt's restaurant a number of times before, but what could he possibly want? Mars barks next to him, as if to answer him.
"Working as a double agent, are you?" Seonghwa asks. He looks at the time, it was still early in the morning. He had a few schedules to get to beforehand. "How is she?" He asks. Mars tilts his head to the side. "Oh, come on, you know who I mean." Mars seems to smile as he hops onto the bed, resting his head on Seonghwa's lap. Seonghwa moves to pet him, and Mars responds by lightly biting him, not enough to hurt, but enough to keep Seonghwa's hand in place.
"Yup, you definitely deserve that," Hongjoong chuckles from the other side of the room. "Mars, bite him harder." Mars barks and applies more pressure. "Looks like we know which side he's on."
"Mama's boy," Seonghwa glowers. Mars rolls off of the bed and leaves the room. "Do you think he's going to run away again?"
"Probably, just hope he doesn't find a way to snitch on you to (Y/N)," Hongjoong sits up in bed to face Seonghwa. "I'm happy for you, really," he says, "it's not easy to be in a relationship as an idol, let alone with one."
"We're not on shore yet," Seonghwa sighs. He couldn't help but notice the strange foreboding feeling surrounding him. Something is going to go wrong, he knows it will. Nothing ever seems to go right with you two. Your first date, even the second one, meeting his parents and meeting yours, your relationship being exposed, and now this.
"Hey, don't overthink things too much," Hongjoong speaks up. "I have a really good feeling that everything will work out fine."
"I hope so."
"I know so," Hongjoong confirms. "You're tenacious, (Y/N) is stubborn, you're perfect for each other. Whatever is coming your way, I know you'll both get through it," Hongjoong adds. Seonghwa could only glance at him.
Despite their words, Mars trots back with a shirt in his mouth, now spotted with saliva, but it was clear what it was nonetheless. It was a white blouse with an undone ribbon in front.
"Now, where did you get that?" Hongjoong asks. Mars barks, as if to answer.
"I threw it in the laundry, figured I could give it back to (Y/N) next time I saw her," Seonghwa clears his throat. Hongjoong could only laugh.
"Well, well, when was the last time (Y/N) stayed over?"
"Never, it got mixed up with my things when we went to..." Seonghwa's voice trailed off. "When we went to Rome."
"Rome, wow, I still can't believe that the company sponsored that."
"I mean, we did have to make content," Seonghwa shrugs.
"It's still a trip regardless," Hongjoong scoffs. Whatever he said next fell on deaf ears. Seonghwa only picked the blouse up and folded it nicely.
He'll make things right again, he knows he has to. One step at a time.
"What are you going to do in the meantime?" Hongjoong asks. "Plan your strategy? I know your parents already want you and (Y/N) back together, what about hers?"
"I'm meeting an old friend of mine, actually, he recently moved to Seoul so he's been wanting to go out," Seonghwa shrugs. "Besides, I know (Y/N)'s parents will be supportive regardless, or at least I hope so. We'd only met the one time they came over here to visit from the States, but even then, they were just glad that she found someone she really liked," he adds.
"(Y/N) and her parents aren't that close?"
"No, or at least, not as close as I am with my parents." Then, suddenly, his expression grows distant. "I think... I think my real problem would be with her brothers." At this, Hongjoong sits up. Mars' ears also perk up, as if this was the first he'd heard of them too.
"(Y/N) has brothers?!"
"Yeah, she doesn't talk about them much though, but when she does it sounds like they're close," Seonghwa leans against his bed frame. "Either way, it's not important right now. Her younger brother's in the States and her older one's... somewhere, I've never met them, actually. From what I hear from (Y/N) he's a bit of a homebody," Seonghwa frowns and stands up. "I'm going to go get ready now, don't wait up for me," he walks over to the closet and the conversation ends there.
~
"Yangyang!" Your voice was shrill in the WayV side of the dorms. Kun only stared at you when you walked in after he said the door was unlocked. "Where is he?"
"What did he do?" He spoke with a voice of a thousand tired men.
"I can't find Mars anywhere, have you seen him?" You crossed your arms.
"Mars? No, I can't say that I have, Yangyang's in his room though, if you want to ask him."
"Thanks, Kun, I'll be in and out!" You smiled and walked down the hall. You knocked on the door quickly and opened the door. "Yang, have you seen-" your words got caught in your throat. Yangyang was staring at you with wide eyes and you matched his expression. With a razor pressed to his leg and a can of shaving cream in his other hand, you both stood frozen for a few seconds longer. "Uh..."
"God dammit, woman, can't you knock?!" Yangyang shoves you out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
"I did knock!" You shout back. "Who the hell shaves in their room?!"
"I do!"
"It's disgusting."
"It's practical."
"Oh my god," you hit your head against his door. "Whatever, have you seen Mars?"
"Mars?"
"Yes, Mars."
"No? Why?"
"I can't find him anywhere!"
"I get this is like an emergency," the door opens and Yangyang, now wearing a pink hoodie and orange shorts, a horrid combination no doubt put together just now, leans against the frame. "But could you not have texted me about this?" He asks.
"I was going to text the chat, but my phone died and I can't find my charger- Ooh! Before I forget, can I borrow yours?" You smiled. Yangyang leaned to the side and handed you his. "Thanks! I'm going to check the Dreamies next. Just, let me know if you've seen him."
"Yeah, yeah, I will!" He closed the door and you were on your own again.
"Any luck?" Kun takes small sips of his coffee.
"Not enough," you shook your head. "Mind if I leave my phone here to charge for a bit?"
"Go ahead," he nods his head toward the outlet, not looking up from his phone. "I'll let you know if I see Mars wandering around here."
"Alright, thanks again," you plugged your phone in and stepped out, walking over to the Dream side of the dorms. One knock was all it took before the door swang open.
"Hi, (Y/N)," Jeno took heavy breaths and had a nervous smile on his face.
"Hey, Jen, just came back from the gym?" You asked, looking at the time.
"Yup!"
"That's early, even for you," you hummed.
"Yeah, yeah," Jeno nods his head. "I've been wanting to work on myself lately, you know? You should come with me next time! I'm always more productive at the gym when I go with someone!"
"What about Jaemin?"
"Too early for him! Come on, (Y/N), it'll be fun! So fun, in fact, that I'm going back right now to get more reps in, you should come with me!" He steps out of the door and closes it behind him.
"What are you hiding, Lee Jeno?"
"These massive guns," Jeno rolls his hoodie sleeves up and flexes, earning an eye roll from you.
"Have you seen Mars?"
"Mars? No, but I'm sure he'll turn up after we go to the gym!" Jeno nods.
"Huh?"
"I mean, Xiaojun hyung is over there right now, Mars and Bella usually play a lot, maybe he knows?" Jeno insists.
"That's true! Good thinking, Jen! Alright, I'll go get ready and we can head over there!"
"Yeah, yeah!" Jeno nods his head exaggeratedly just as the door opens behind him.
"Lee Jeno! What do you mean you lost Mars?!" Renjun shouts. At that moment, all the color in Jeno's face drained. You leaned over to the side.
"Mars is missing?" You ask.
"Well, Jisung's been crying about it all morning, so yeah," Renjun sighs.
"Uh... hold on a second, could I borrow one of your phones?" You ask. Renjun hands you his and you type in the first number you thought of.
~
"You know what, Yeosang? I'm sick of your shit," Wooyoung huffs. Yeosang rolls his eyes.
"Oh yeah? That makes two buddy."
"Wait, that doesn't make sense," Mingi shakes his head. "Yeosang are you also sick of your own shit or Wooyoung's shit?"
"Why would I be sick of my own shit, Mingi?" Yeosang scoffs.
"I was just saying! You're the one who said it wrong!"
"Okay, okay, break it up," Hongjoong steps in. "What are you two arguing about now?" He looks between Yeosang and Wooyoung, who are each holding pet food.
"Yeosang thinks that Mars likes beef but I know that Mars likes chicken more," Wooyoung explains. Yeosang groans.
"That's not true! Mars always has leftovers when you feed him that crap!"
"I just give him a lot so he doesn't starve!"
"Why don't we just scoop each into a bowl and see which one he eats first," Hongjoong sighs. He pauses when his phone starts ringing, seeing an unknown number. "Hello?" The other members of ATEEZ stood in tense silence.
"Hey, Hongjoong! I'm glad you answered! It's (Y/N), I'm using Renjun's phone."
"Oh! Hey, (Y/N), what's up?" Hongjoong immediately relaxes.
"I was going to call Seonghwa but I had a feeling that he wouldn't pick up after the whole fiasco, you know? But, anyway, hey is Mars there? No one's seen him over here."
"Yeah, Mars is here- Hey! Since I have you on the line, let me put you on speaker really quick," Hongjoong moves the phone from his ear and taps on the speaker button. "(Y/N), does Mars prefer chicken or beef?"
"Hm? Neither, Mars likes pork."
"What?!" Wooyoung and Yeosang's voices were overpowering. The group could hear your laughter through the speaker.
"Why didn't you ask Seonghwa? He knows that too, I'm sure."
"Hyung said that he had to step out for a bit!" Wooyoung walks up to Hongjoong and speaks into his phone. "I think he mentioned that he was meeting a friend."
"That's good! He needs a break from you guys every now and then," you chuckled, "well, I have to head out too! I promised Jeno I'd go to the gym with him, so I'll see you guys sometime soon!"
"Bye, (Y/N)!" The group shouted out before Hongjoong hung up. He put one hand on his hip and looked at Yeosang and Wooyoung.
"Well, we know what kind of food to get from now on," Hongjoong says. "Just finish up those two first and then we'll get the right one."
"I can't believe we never considered pork," Yunho frowns.
"He always ate the beef one," Yeosang grumbles. Mars' ears shift downward as if he felt guilty. The look in his eyes were enough to show that he wanted to head back to the NCT dorms, right away, preferably. Maybe if he was lucky, the one they call Johnny would throw him a pork chop. Mars whimpered, his brain filled with thoughts of food.
"Mars! You're drooling!" Yeosang grabbed a paper towel and wiped Mars' face. Mars spots the bag of dog food in Yeosang's hand and a cry slips out of him. If he didn't miss them so much, he'd have ran back to you in a heartbeat. The life of a dog is hard.
~
Seonghwa adjusted his mask carefully while he waited in front of the café. He stared at the message on his phone, he was slightly surprised that Kyungjae still had his number, considering that they exchanged it so many years ago. They were both in the same club in grade school, and Seonghwa being Seonghwa he did his best to help the younger members out with getting adjusted to club duties and activities. Kyungjae just so happened to be the one of his dongsaengs that he really got along with. They were close up until Seonghwa had graduated, and after that, their interactions were very sparse. They hadn't seen each other in person until that day about a month ago.
"Hyung! Hyung! Hey, I'm over here!" Kyungjae grins. Seonghwa's expression lights up and he waves at him.
"Kyungjae, how have you been?" Seonghwa asks.
"I've been good! Let's head inside," Kyungjae holds the door open for him and Seonghwa steps in. They spot a table near the back and set their things down first. "Hyung, I hear their strawberry tarts here are really good, should I get you one?"
"It's alright, I can-" Seonghwa's hand was on his wallet already but Kyungjae shook his head.
"No way, hyung! I've got this one, I got this great new job and you always spotted me in school, let me get this one!" Kyungjae was off before Seonghwa could argue. Seonghwa sighed instead, watching Kyungjae speak to the worker. He leans back against his chair, letting his mind wander.
You had only mentioned your brother's once to him, and it was after he introduced you to his older brother.
~
May 15, 2021
"He's nice! You told me he was scary," you nudged Seonghwa's arm just as his older brother walked off. Seonghwa had told you earlier about how intense his brother could be, a natural response to growing up together, of course, but you'd almost too confidently shook off the fear. You'd told him that he didn't have to worry and, lo and behold, you both hit it off almost too perfectly. "See, I told you that you didn't have to worry. I have brothers too, you know," you laughed.
"You never mentioned it," Seonghwa says. You'd been together for a while now, he was surprised that you'd kept it from him for so long.
"Yeah, well, we're not as close as we used to be, but we still check up on each other. My younger brother's a pro-gamer! That really set my mom off, oh my, that's a hard job, you know? He's in the U.S. right now training or something like that, so I doubt you'll meet him any time soon. Even I can't get him to take a break and come over here," you sighed.
"Gaming? Does he stream?"
"Every now and then, yeah," you nodded. "I haven't had time to check in on those, though, I'm being run to the ground," you sigh. "But, actually, my older brother lives here! Daegu, I think, but uh... he doesn't really go out much. Plus, he's always busy with his job too, he works in Foreign Affairs," you shrugged. "Mostly from home, but yeah. He practically raised me and my younger brother though, I owe him a lot! I'll try to get him out of the house to introduce you one day, promise!"
~
25 February 2022
Needless to say, you never did convince that older brother of yours. But he took your word for it then that he didn't have anything against the relationship. Then, he felt a slight vibration against the table, he flipped his phone over and, well, nothing. He looked over to Kyungjae's instead, seeing an incoming call from a contact titled 'J'. Soon, the vibration stopped, and a simple missed call notification remained. But it wasn't that that caught his attention. It was something that got him to sit up straight. He cleared the notification and, sure enough, he'd recognize you from anywhere.
He knew this picture, it was straight out of the previews for Photograph.
Was he just a fan of NCT? He wouldn't be too surprised, your group had hiked in popularity over the past year, and he knew it was normal to have pictures of your favorite member as your home screen or lock screen, but he was sure that he was justified in feeling a little weird about it. He moved away just as he noticed Kyungjae on his way back with the pastries in hand.
"Sorry that took a while, hyung! They were taking way too long to get our orders out," Kyungjae placed the tart and coffee in front of him before taking his seat. "So, how are things with ATEEZ? Being an idol must be so time-consuming," Kyungjae sighs.
"It is, a little bit, but I find time for the people I love," Seonghwa says. "How about you? You're a stylist now, right?"
"Yeah! I got accepted into my dream company and now I'm working with my favorite group. You know, a lot of my classmates told me to stay away from my favorite group if I wanted to keep them as my faves, but if anything it just made my appreciation for them more," Kyungjae gushes.
"NCT, right?"
"Yeah, how'd you know?"
"I still talk to some people within that group, you know," Seonghwa slides his coffee closer to him. "They told me that there was a new stylist, so I figured it was you," he says. Not really, he just put it together now. All of the pieces had finally been put together, it must have been the man in front of him that you were trying to tell him about before.
But he could hardly believe it, he knew Kyungjae well at some point, and he didn't think that he'd ever do something so uncomfortable to another person, but times really do change people. He felt uncomfortable himself now. There was no doubt in his mind, Kyungjae had to know that he had been in a relationship before, and if he really was your stylist then he was certain that he had some idea that you were talking again. He looked down at his coffee, it was a ridiculous notion but he didn't feel comfortable drinking it anymore. Without another thought, he shot you a text.
'Call me.'
In no time at all, his phone rang.
"Sorry, that's the company," Seonghwa took it before Kyungjae could look at the screen. He holds his phone to his ear, making sure to keep the volume low enough so only he could hear it.
"Hey, is everything alright?" Your voice sounded tired, maybe a little strained. He wanted to ask you that, but he had to keep the charade on. "Sorry, I'm at the gym right now and my arms feel like jelly, but I'm taking a long break so I have time." There you go reading his mind, he didn't think you'd be able to that still.
"Really? Now?" Seonghwa speaks.
"Huh?"
"Just have Hongjoong do it."
"What? Seonghwa, did you mean to have me call you?"
"I really have to go in today, huh? I'll be there in half an hour," Seonghwa continues.
"Here? In the gym? I mean, if you want? I'm with Jeno right now though and I think he's trying to get me to dead lift but forget that! I think my arms are about to fall off!"
"Alright, thank you for letting me know. I'll call later."
"Okay then? Alrighty! Stay safe!" Seonghwa hung up and shook his head.
"Sorry, I'm going to have to head out early, could we raincheck this for later?" He plasters on his idol smile and Kyungjae nods.
"Yeah, that's no problem, hyung! Just let me know."
"Thanks, Kyungjae, I'll talk to you later," Seonghwa slips his jacket on and walks out of the café.
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