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some people really be out there typing fanfics longer than war and peace in their free time and then going on about their life like it's no big deal. how fucking incredible. like no offense to tolstoy but that was like. his whole job
I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH, you can combine one 8oz can of pumpkin puree with one box cake mix (any kind but spice cake is best) and about 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips, drop by tablespoon-ish onto a greased/parchment/silpat cookie sheet, and bake at 350F for 13-16 minutes
if there are no spices in either your cake mix or pumpkin puree i suggest adding warm spices such as cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves
THE GOVERNMENT DOES NOT WANT THIS INFORMATION GETTING AROUND
Damian, all of seven and clearly wise to the ways of the world, decides he's going to find his father sooner.
So he does recon.
His father is Batman, and Batman is in Gotham. Clearly with how much Mother tells him he isn't ready to face Batman yet, no matter what he does, this is just a test to see how he will escape.
A test he will pass.
He concludes that the only way to escape his Mother and Grandfather's watchful eyes is to use magic to get to Gotham.
He gathers up as much intel as he can about summons, and summons the Ghost King in a circle designed to compel the King to do as he says. Since this being will be royalty, Damian puts down the constraint of only two days; it should be about that long to locate his father, and he isn't in the business of forcing another being to obey him like a slave.
What Damian doesn't know is that this is the wrong kind of summoning circle. It's just a normal kind of summoning circle with instructions to either find Damian's family or become it within two days.
Now Danny has to get Damian to Gotham and find this "Batman", in a dimension he's very unfamiliar with, or he's going to be a teenage single dad.
One of my favorite scenes i've ever written lmao, from "The Princess and the Peasant"
I seriously strongly recommend reading this if you're a fan of Rarijack like me. It's got action, romance, comedy, drama, all of the above and more; It's a three course meal and also the whole fucking menu
god. GOD. the underlying anger in everything terry writes really IS apparent in hogfather bc fuck u mean this is how things should be? no the fuck it shouldn't. poor people shouldn't have to be satisfied with what they get, that's just fucking capitalism. i REALLY like that terry decided to use death as projection for what he thinks bc death doesn't know anything and it has to be explained to him and by it being explained to him it shows how fucking stupid those things are. bc ok here's this world where an equivalent of santa ACTUALLY exists and, because it mirrors our world, it's still unjust. santa actually fucking exists in this world and he could give ANYONE ANYTHING bc he's essentially a god and people gave him that power by making him up, BUT because ppl imagined him in a way that poor people don't get shit (like they usually do) and rich people get EVERYTHING they want, he exists like that. whereas death has seen the absolutely WORST of humanity and he STILL thinks that's bullshit and it's not how it should be, it's just how it goes. bc capitalism is always capitalism where there's money and the world will always be fucked up as long as there are oppressor to hold it up. like i just.
Character concept: kindly old mentor figure who is scouring the land in search of The Chosen One to pull the sword from the stone. They find the kid destined to be king, whisk them away on a magical adventure full of lessons like "be a good sport" and "always see the best in people," and guide them to the stone.
The child pulls the sword out and immediately gets knifed in the ribs by their mentor, who takes the sword, hides the body, and gets declared the rightful king.