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writingtoforgetreality · 4 years

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“Who is she?” (Alexander Calvert x Reader)

Request: I would like to ask for something where Alex and the reader are dating and the two are part of the Supernatural cast, and they fake a fight in front of Jensen, Jared and Misha, but it ends in a cute moment. That's it lol. (by anonymous), [Actors-Masterlist]

Summary: You could not find the script you needed for an important upcoming audition. Still, you had to start practicing or you would not perform well. Luckily, Alex was always there to help you with your lines. But what would happen if things got out of hand?

Words: 1,937

Warnings: language, mentions of cheating, argument, protective!Jensen, fluff, (Y/E/C) = your eye color

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

“Alex?” you were currently in your shared apartment in Vancouver. Searching for a very important script, you slowly started to go insane. You could have sworn you put it right on top of the coffee table. Why was it not there anymore? Maybe Alex had seen it.

“Yeah?” his scruffy voice made you look up. He came straight out of the shower, only a towel hanging low on his waist. On every other day, this sight would have been an invitation for you but you had to find this damn script.

“Have you seen my script? I put it right there.” you pointed to the place where you last saw it.

“Um, I don´t know...Are you sure you left it there?” Alex got closer to you and started helping you. First the living room, then the kitchen. Soon after, it felt like you searched through your entire apartment, without luck.

“(Y/N), it´s time to head out. We´ll be late.” he disappeared in the bedroom and came out seconds later in a black hoodie and gray sweatpants. Why bother wearing anything else when you had to change as soon as you were on set?

“Ugh, okay. I´m coming.” it did not make sense to you. You needed that script. There was a very important audition coming up. A big movie with TOM CRUISE. Yes, you heard that right. An action film where you would portray his love interest. This would be your chance to really start at Hollywood. Your role in Supernatural was the first start and the fans loved you a lot. Just like Alex, you came around for the 13th season. At first, you were only meant to stick around for a few episodes. Just some girl who was saved by Jack and brought back to the bunker. The fans seemed to like you and they almost immediately caught up on the chemistry Alex and you shared. When you started dating, the writers decided to make your character Jack´s love interest. Now, the last few episodes were about to air and you still had not found your next job.

Of course you worked on it to change that. Supernatural was your first acting job, you were not the most famous in this industry. Jared had already found his next role: Texas Ranger. Jensen will be a part of the third season of The Boys. You were incredibly happy for them but it also scared the shit out of you. If it took them this long to be cast in another project, how long would it take you? That was something you should not be thinking about during your ride to the set of Supernatural. You should start preparing for the upcoming scenes.

The first half of the day was very productive. Ever since the thought of shooting the LAST episodes has sunken in, the crew really wanted to bring the best out of every scene. Still, Jensen, Jared and Misha loved to mess with Alex and you. There had to be enough scenes for the gag reel, right?

As the director called for lunch break, all of you made your way over to the catering area. You were not hungry, thoughts still with your lost script. Maybe you should just give them a call to let them know that you needed another script. No, that would not leave a good impression.

“When do we continue filming today?” Jensen asked.

“Uhhh, around 3 pm, I think?” Jared´s answer was not really helpful. Most days he had no idea about your schedule. One of the reasons that made you love him even more.

“For once you´re right.” Misha threw in.

Everyone headed back to their trailers, wanting to prepare for the next few scenes and relax a bit.

“Can you practice with me?” you asked Alex as you were walking towards your trailers. You did not share those because they were very small to begin with.

“Practice what? We rehearsed our shared scenes, like, a hundred times last night.” he chuckled, amused by your uncertainty. He knew how you barely ever forgot your lines or broke character yet you still wanted to keep on running through your lines.

“Nooo, I mean for the audition. It´s next week and if I don´t start going through it now I´ll be even more nervous.” you came to a halt, waiting for his reaction.

“I thought you lost the script?” Alex turned around to look at you.

“Misplaced. Anyway, I know the story more or less. We could just improvise. Please?” your big (Y/E/C) looked at him in a way you knew he could never resist.

“In my trailer or-”

“Actually, I think right here, outside, would be perfectly fine.” your smile grew. You loved acting alongside Alex. This role was not meant to be his but he was always happy to help you with auditions. You did the same for him. Recalling what was written on the script, you tried your best to explain the story to him. It was easy, really, your character found emails from another woman, arranging meetings that go way back, like seven months. The scene you had to prepare for the audition was you confronting “Tom Cruise” which ended in a big fight.

“Got it?” you watched Alex´ face closely, looking for any misunderstandings. A nod from his head made you get into character.

“Hey, honey, I´m home.” your back faced Alex, your body language seemingly tense. He moved closer to you as you did not answer him. A hand was held out to touch your shoulder but as soon as it came in contact with you, you brushed it off angrily. Turning around with tears in your eyes, Alex was impressed by how fast you could make this role alive, without even saying a word. You truly were magnificent.

“DO NOT call me honey!” you managed to keep the tears at bay, thinking it would be better to let them spill a bit later.

“What´s wrong?” Alex gave you space, getting the sign of you not wanting to be touched by him.

“Oh, so you don´t have anything to tell me?” your arms crossed in front of your chest, your eyebrows raising, waiting for him to answer you.

“Um, I´m not su-”

“BULLSHIT! Bullshit.” the second part was barely above a whisper, showing that, despite everything you saw, you still cared for him. Loved him, even. Alex just stood there, knowing what your next words would be like.

“How long has this been going on?” your gaze was focused on the floor, not wanting him to see your tears that now started spilling.

“She doesn´t mean anything to me. You are the on-” but once again, Alex was cut off by your screaming.

“Did you fuck her?” your voice was small, not wanting to ask this question but desperate for the answer.

“Sweetheart, I-”

“DID YOU FUCK HER?” this time you screamed at his face. Your emotions were all over the place.

What neither Alex nor you noticed was Jensen, Jared and Misha storming out of their trailers due to hearing screams. When they saw the scene in front of them, they came to a fast stop. Did they just hear that Alex had cheated on their (Y/N)? Someone who was like a little sister to them? Jensen made himself ready to storm to you, wanting nothing more than to punch Alex. Jared and Misha, though, held him back.

“Yes.” Alex sighed. “But it´s not like she means anything to me.” he once again came closer to you. This time you did not protest. You were too exhausted to react to it.

“Who is she?” scared of what the answer would be, you took a step back but looked straight into his eyes.

“Cassie.” you read Alex´ face as regret but as soon as you heard him say the name you could have thrown up.

“CASSIE?! MY BEST FRIEND CASSIE?!” you lunged towards him and started punching his chest, too weak to do any damage, but you were angry and did not know what else to do.

That was too much for Jensen. He ripped himself free and ran towards you, Jared and Misha following close behind. A shove from the side made Alex and you separate. Suddenly you were pulled back by two strong arms. As you looked behind, you saw Jared holding you close to him. As you focused your gaze back to Alex, you were shocked to see him in Jensen´s grasp. You did not quite understand what Jensen was saying but it did not sound good at all.

“Jensen, stop!” you wiggled yourself out of Jared´s arms and ran to save Alex. You tried pulling Jensen away but he was too strong. Even Alex could not free himself.

“IT WAS JUST ACTING!” your scream erupted which made Jensen stop in his tracks. Slowly, he let go of Alex who coughed a few times.

“What?!” the confusion was written all over Jensen´s face.

“Alex and I were just practicing for my audition next week. You know, the one with Tom Cruise? I told you about that.” your heart was racing, your breathing too fast. Jared and Misha were already at Alex´ side, making sure he was not hurt.

“Shit, I´m sorry. Alex, are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, all good.” he waved it off as if it was nothing. Typical Alex, you thought.

Suddenly you started laughing, replaying the scene in your head. Everyone looked at you weirdly but copied your actions soon after.

“Alex, he almost killed you.” by now tears were streaming down your face because you were laughing so hard.

“Hey, I didn´t even touch him.” Jensen complained.

“Oh yeah? Tell that my throat.” Alex stated sarcastically.

“That was acting?” Jared asked to which Alex and you only nodded.

“If you don´t get the job I´ll make sure to sue them, just so you know.” this time it was Misha who spoke up. This only made all of you laugh even more.

“Everyone back on set, please!” you could hear the director yell. Jared, Misha and you walked over, chatting and laughing about everything that just happened. Alex and Jensen, though, were a bit behind.

“Sorry again, kid. I really thought y´all were fighting. It sounded so real. You sure you´re okay?” he finished his sentence with a light chuckle, still somewhat ashamed of throwing himself at Alex like that.

“I´m fine, Jensen, really.” Alex laughed lightly. “Besides, now I know what happens if I ever hurt (Y/N) in any way.”

“You better take care of her and treat her like a princess. I´m serious.” Jensen had a stern look on his face but smiled anyway. You meant a lot to him and he could not bare the thought of anyone hurting you.

“I will. I promise.”

“Y´all coming or what?” you screamed at them from the other end of the set, waiting for the two of them so you could finally continue filming.

“On our way.” Alex said back, beginning to walk towards where you were standing. As he kept walking he thought about you again. How it was so easy for you to act out such a hard scene. Your talent amazed him. He really hoped you would land that role. From what he had seen so far, you were perfect for it. God, he loved you. It still had not sunken in that you were his. What did he ever do to deserve you? He knew he could not live without you and he would keep on reminding you of his love for you every single day.

Published (09/10/2020) by Cathy

Tags: @kalasyrtiaan, @blairrrose (thanks for your support <3)

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holylulusworld · 4 years

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Distraction, please

Request: Hi, I was wondering if I could put in a request? A Dean x reader story where the reader is studying (lol I am now) and she doesn’t take breaks, she just works whole day long and tends to forget to eat (guilty lol). Dean will distract her (maybe in a smutty way hehe) for a break.

Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam

Warnings: language, smut, unprotected sex, fingering, oral (female receicing), Dean being jealous of books, nakedness

Tapping his fingers onto the table Dean rolls his eyes as you ignore him once again. For days you bury your nose into your books, determined to get an A for your finals. Maybe even an A+.

Not amused you don’t spend time with him or at least give him a glance Dean hates your books with passion and he wants to take them out of your hands and burn them, or bury them six feet under.

“Do you want anything to eat or drink?” Dean tries but you raise one finger, shaking your head. “Sweetheart, you haven’t eaten since breakfast and that was just an apple.”

“I got no time, Dean. Let me finish this and I’m done and prepared for my finals. I can’t stop to study right now, Dean. Not close to my goal.”

Sighing heavily Dean falls against the chair with a loud thud. While you ignore the noise he glances at you, licking his lips. You are studying for over a week and he didn’t get any kind of attention.

His libido works on overload and all he can think about is to take your books away and press his cock into your hands instead.

Dean’s eyes darken when you stretch your sore body and take your glasses off to rub your tired eyes.

“A glass of water or beer?” Dean tries once again to get your attention but you even ignore your rumbling stomach.

“I got no time, Dean. If you can’t be silent, leave the library. You know I want to become an expert for antic myths. We need this knowledge to defeat monsters. Now…shhh…”

Smirking you hear Dean silently groan but he falls silent as you prop your feet onto the table and he gets a glimpse of your panties.

“Damn…” Whispering the word Dean moves one chair closer to you, smirking as you are too engrossed in reading your book to see him fall to his knees to crawl toward your slightly spread legs.

He’s kneeling in front of your chair, licking his lips as his shoulders spread your legs wider and his face nuzzles your mound.

“DEAN! Holy shit…” Panties shoved aside, tongue flicking your clit Dean ignores your outburst. Instead of stopping his tongue he rips your panties apart to shove two fingers into you.

“Pretty student. Just relax and study some more. I’ll make sure you barely feel the distraction…” Dean husks against your pussy but you are far from being able to study as his lips seal around your clit and two fingers thrust harshly in and out of your channel.

“Dean-that’s no help to concentrate…fuck…I…don’t stop…” Your book clutched to your chest you let Dean toss your legs over his shoulders to work your heated flesh. His tongue teases your clit while his fingers catch your g-spot, making you squirm.

“That’s it, let go…”

“No…I want…oh…fuck me…” Crying out you toss the book to the floor, the last chapter long forgotten.

Your legs fall open and you pant heavily as you must watch Dean open his pants, a triumphal smirk all over his face.

“I knew you will relax enough…”

“Dean…” Panting you try to get up on wobbling legs, but you don’t get far.

Placed onto the table you sit on the edge, letting Dean hook one leg over his thigh. He’s impatiently lining his cock up with your entrance, pushing into you in one go.

Your hands fist his shirt, that goddamn red shirt of sex and you wrap your legs tightly around his waistline, grinning up at Dean. “Fuck me, Baby…distraction, please…”

One hand in your hair, mouth kissing a trail down your throat Dean groans, feeling you clench tightly around him. When he starts moving it’s rough, fast and desperate. One week of pent up lust gets released with every hard thrust.

Your hands fly to his shoulder, nails dig deep into the fabric of his shirt as you let Dean fuck you straight into the table.

“Dean…”

“That’s it, my smart student. Just let me make sure all you can think about is the stuff you just learned.” Dean pants against your skin, loving the way you let him take care of you.

“Dean, all I can think about now is your dick hitting the right spot. Jesus, Winchester…I think I will forget my name one day…”

Laughing Dean wraps his arms around your body to carry into his bedroom, kicking the abandoned book aside on his way.

----

Back hitting the mattress, you watch Dean strip his clothes off, tossing them someone onto the floor. Your top and bra join the pile of clothes before Dean crawls back between your legs to continue what he started.

Lips claiming yours, one hand pressed to your back the other stroking your right thigh he slowly starts moving again.

Dean is all-consuming, surrounding you with his body and scent as he slowly thrusts into you.

“I love you, my smart girl. You are Sammy in a sexier body, and you smell better.” Laughing you paw at Dean’s back, meeting his harder coming thrusts till the knot in your belly bursts open.

“I hope I’m sexier than Sam…fuck…Dean…” Gripping his biceps you love the way his muscles flex under your fingertips, love you can see the moment he comes in his eyes before his cum floats your belly.

A wall of muscles carefully covers your body. His face in your neck, hands all over your body Dean just presses his skin to yours as your hands slide over his arms.

“I really needed a distraction, Dean. Thanks.”

“I love distracting my girl. Can do it anytime you want me to. How about I come with you and distract you during your finals too?” Giggling you shake your head.

“I don’t think my fellow students or my professors want to watch us going at it during my finals. But you could wait for me outside, to make sure I do not chicken out.”

“Deal. After you are finished we celebrate in my backseat…” Grinning Dean pecks your cheek before he pulls out to clean you up.

----

“Here we have your books, a delicious sandwich, something sweet and water. Now study, read the last chapter and I’ll sit next to you on the bad and you can look at me to have a sexy distraction.” Wiggling his eyebrows Dean points toward his naked body.

“Dude, I can’t concentrate when you lie next to me, naked and all…” Cursing you glance at Dean, not wanting to get distracted again. “Covered your body, all of it and let me read ten more pages and we can talk about you and me in the backseat…”

“Alright, Sweetheart. I will cover my sexiness and be as quiet as possible. I can’t be a again distraction after all…”

SPN Forever Tags

@donnaintx, @screechingartisancashbailiff, @fallen-wolf22, @sister-winchesters99, @mogaruke, @the-is13, @helloitsmeamie203, @strayrosesbloom, @thewinchesterco, @hobby27, @kittycatlover18, @gh0stgurl, @marvelfansworld , @sandlee44, @hawaiianohana31, @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt, @katpatrova17, @notyourtypicalrose , @heyitscam99, @flamencodiva, @echoesofpassion, @cocklesbelli, @voltage-my2dlove, @fandom-princess-forevermore @thenamelesschibi, @lauravic, @fandomsrourlives, @wittysunflower, @drakelover78, @lemondropirwin, @lonewolf471, @wronglanemendes, @spnhollis, @void-imaginations, @jay-and-dean, @shatteredabby, @juniorhuntersam, @helpmeluci, @neii3n, @goodgodimaweirdperson, @alltimesamantha, @chonisberonica, @supernaturalonice, @stuckys-whore, @shadowkat-83 @officialmarvelwhore, @wecantgiggleitsafandom, @meganywinchester, @shikshinkwon, @miraclesoflove, @yolobloggers, @lu-sullivan, @maniacproffesor, @hollymac79, @straycuties9, @kayla-2000, @ilovefanfic86, @gracefultrenchcoat494, @babygirls-fav, @spnwoman, @amiquette, @linki-locks11, @geekofmanyforms, @eggingamazinglove, @jessica-marsh09, @spnficgirl, @shut-themoonscone, @thequeenreaders, @countrygal17a, @kteelou, @soryuwifeyxx, @kricketc28, @atomicfandombomb, @defenderrosetyler, @shortwinchester, @maybesomedaygayyyy, @tmiships4life, @deanmonandnegansbitch, @exo-nova, @laxe-from-outer-space, @sabascio, @that-place-called-middle-earth, @the-broken-angel-13, @bunnybaby89, @pandabiiissh, @maddiedott, @fandom-imagines1, @lilulo-12, @theoneandonlymelol, @mblaqgi, @sea040561, @clawsandshotguns, @justsomedreaming , @differentstudentrunawaysposts, @hhiggs, @deepmuffinspymaker, @certaindeanwinchesterforcastiel, @cassiopeia-barrow, @mep6811, @jo-like-josette, @supernaturalenchanted, @mscarter213, @trumpettay, @waywardbaby, @its-the-timey-wimey-winchesters, @zxph-yr

Dean/Jensen Forever Tags

@spnfamily-j2, @supernatural-bellawinchester, @butifulsoul125, @lyinginthegingerlocks, @deans-baby-momma, @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester, @20gayneen, @janicho88, @thefaithfulwriter, @dreaminemz, @negans-lucille-tblr, @akshi8278, @midnightsilver16830, @mrspeacem1nusone, @ria132love, @caligraphee, @the-witch-in-silence, @multisuperfandom, @deansgirl-1968, @justanotherwinchester, @jadesupernatural, @squirrelnotsam, @gaveherhearttotheliontattoo, @roonyxx, @jason-todd-squad, @thevelvetseries, @spnsuper17, @adoptdontshoppets, @woodworthti666, @frederikkeborup, @psychicforest, @luciathewinchestergirl, @michellemxndes, @addictedtofictionalcharacters, @gabifernandessn, @magssteenkamp, @neerness , @jxackles, @tranquility-or-chaos

#spn #spn fanfiction #request fill #distraction please #dean winchester #smut #deean winchester smut #dean winchester x you #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester SPN #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean x you #dean winchester one shot #Dean Winchester One Shots *Request Fills only*

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kinktae · 6 years

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Tempting || 10

Y/N is an angel and a good one at that. She steers clear of the seven deadly sins, especially lust. She is out performing her duties when she runs into a demon. Luckily for her, that demon, Taehyung, doesn’t seem to buy into that whole “Angels and Demons are sworn enemies” idea. But unluckily for her, Taehyung just so happens to be the very embodiment of sin. Especially lust.

Or, “For someone who is meant to be so pure, you sure are dirty, angel.”

pairing: demon!taehyung x angel!reader

genre: fantasy, smut, angst

warnings: alcohol use, mentions of suicide/death, lots of dirty talk and smut lol

A/N: this is less biblical and more supernatural?? Like less focus on religion itself and more focus on angels and demons as immortal creatures even though I might reference some “biblical” terms lol sorry this is too unholy anyways it’s fine. oh and this is a dream I had!

CHAPTERS: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 (final)

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CHAPTER TEN (THIS CHAPTER IS ACTUALLY EDITED FOR ONCE and this chapter is dedicated to @timeline-comics who helped me with the plot <3)

I woke up to the feeling of goose bumps running up and down my skin.

The source of temperature-induced discomfort was quickly pinpointed, as I opened my eyes to see Taehyung's arm and leg tightly wrapped around me, pressing me into his chest.

His hot breath pressed against the crook of my neck, where his sleeping head had taken purchase. The rest of Taehyung, however, remained cool to the touch.

Angels naturally gravitated towards warm things; both physically, such as sunlight, and figuratively, like love.

How odd that I would find warmth in a demon.

I shifted my body away from the cool-skinned boy with a whine. My covers had somehow ended up by my feet and I wanted desperately to retrieve them.

Taehyung let out a groan of protest but let go of me.

I sat up, pausing for a moment as I took in the soreness that lay in-between my legs.

“Morning.” A tired groggy voice called out from beside me.

I turned over to look over at Taehyung, who was staring at me through hooded eyelids, clearly more than willing to go back to bed.

“Good morning.” I smiled at him, my heart swelling at the sight of the sleepy form of the boy I loved so much. He gave me a lazy smile before shutting his eyes once more.

I turned back towards the front of my bed and reached over to pull my covers back over Taehyung and I.

Immediately, Taehyung threw his arms around me, pulling me back into his chest.

I turned over in his grip so that I could face him. Taehyung was awake once more, an odd look on his face.

“How are you?” He asked, nervously.

“I’m well, and yourself?”

Taehyung rolled his eyes and brought up a hand to flick the tip of my nose, causing me to exclaim in laughter.

“I mean how are you feeling? After your first fuck and stuff.”

“God, you really do have a way with words.” I sighed at the crude boy, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

“I’m fine. Just a little sore, I suppose.” I told him with a hum, admiring how the morning sun that seeped into my room fell on his handsome face.

“That’s good.” He sighed happily before sending me a small smile. I could feel myself blush lightly as I smiled back at him.

I couldn’t believe I slept with Taehyung. Having Taehyung pressed against me and holding me like he did last night felt wonderful. Along with the other things he did, of course.

“So... you up for round two?” Taehyung smirked, the question clearly having had been on his tongue since the moment he first regained consciousness.

I laughed and rolled my eyes, pressing my mouth against his. Thankfully, Taehyung let the kiss remain soft, just moving his lips slowly against mine.

Pulling away, I sighed, “You need to go.”

Taehyung scoffed sarcastically, “What am I? Some sort of one night stand you have to kick out?”

“Yes.” I told him, getting up to get out of bed.

I was in some sort of blissed out high right now, still glowing from last nights effects. As much as I wanted to lay in bed with Taehyung for the rest of time, the last thing I needed was for one of my roommates to walk in and see a demon in my bed. Besides, I had to take a shower and clean all my sheets.

“Wow, love you too.” Taehyung grumbled, moving to get out of bed as well.

I knew he had said it sarcastically, but the fact that he had said it at all still left my cheeks red and smiling.

“Wait, pull your shirt up, angel.”

My smile quickly faded as I sent a scowl his way instead.

“No, I said no round two.” I scolded him which just caused him to roll his eyes.

“Angel.” Was all he said as he took a step towards me before lifting my shirt up and over my bare chest.

I squeaked out in protest, throwing my hands over my breasts to cover them.

Taehyung let out a deep laugh, his voice still recovering from having just had woken up.

“Lemme see.” He back me into my bed. I fell back involuntarily and Taehyung took that as his opportunity to pry my hands off of myself.

“Pretty.” He breathed once he had successfully held my hands away from myself.

With a final extersion of energy, I pulled my hands out of his grip and yanked my shirt back down, sending him a frown. I shoved him away from me.

What on earth was wrong with him?

“You pervert!” I accused, crossing my arms over my chest, in case he tried to pull another stunt like that again.

“Shut up, you love me.” Taehyung stated with a cocky smirk that I wanted to wipe off him so badly.

“Go away.”

Taehyung’s smirk was replace with a sad pout, “Say you love me, angel.”

I blushed at the sudden request, caught off guard.

“I love you.” I told him earnestly.

In response, Taehyung just stared at me, before clearing his throat.

“This is gonna sound so stupid but... I think I’ve always had love inside me. It’s like, it’s always been there, but it wasn’t until I met you that I began to feel it. Does that make sense? Without you, I would’ve never known who I was. And the fact that I’m someone that you say you love back is something I’ll never be able to wrap my head around. I don’t deserve you but I’m so fucking happy that I have you because I love you, Y/N. More than you know.”

I sat in front of Taehyung, doe-eyed at his sudden impromptu confession. Taehyung’s cheeks grew pink, as if he wasn’t aware of what he was saying until he had said it.

“I– Fuck, that was cheesy, I’m sorry.” Taehyung laughed nervously, his hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

It was moments like these that made me sometimes wonder if we were both in over our heads. We were in this too deep at this point, and I couldn’t leave Taehyung if I wanted to. It scared me.

“I love cheesy.” I assured him, my smile wide. Taehyung gave me a relieved grin.

“Come over this afternoon. We can watch some of Jin’s human movies that he has given to us. We could also make some pizza. Or, if all that sounds lame, I can always just eat you out until the sun comes up.”

I let out a surprise laugh, my face immediately heating up, “Oh, God. Is there an all of the above option?”

“Come over this afternoon and find out.” He taunted with a smirk and raise of an eyebrow.

He made his way to my window, starting to leave.

“Don’t forget to do your angel magic and wear some Purgy eyes in case Jungkook is home.” Taehyung called out with a final wave before jumping out of my window and into the day.

I sighed. I didn’t think stealing yet another essence suppressor was going to sit well with my fellow roommates. In fact, I should probably apologize to all of them for the scene I created the other day.

Walking in my bathroom, I decide to shower before doing anything else. Laundry and repenting would have to happen after I was clean.

I stood in front of my mirror as I peeled off my shirt. I let out a small gasp at my reflection.

My breasts were littered with purple bruises, some small and others that bled into one another. So this is what Taehyung was looking at. The memory of how I had permitted Taehyung to mark up my chest ran through my head.

Imagine if I have caved in and let him have his way with my neck.

I sighed at the sight.

Odd how something that looked so bad had felt so good.

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“– I just really wanted to apologize for how I spoke to all of you the other day. I lied to you about taking the essence suppressor. You were completely justified in asking me about it. I’m sorry.” I finished, my head bowed slightly.

I had walked downstairs, my hands full of my bed sheets, when I saw Hobi and Namjoon sitting at the table, eating breakfast. They both looked at me quickly before going back to whatever it was they were doing. In Namjoon’s case, it was reading a book he had laid out in front of him, and in Hobi’s it was demolishing his meal.

Setting my sheets to wash, I knew I had to say something. Things were awkward and tense in this household and it was entirely my fault. So I made my way up to the table and began to seek forgiveness.

“Y/N, I forgave you the moment you angrily marched up the stairs away from us. You know I can’t stay mad at you.” Hobi reassured me with a small smile.

“I can.” Namjoon reminded, his eyes fixated on his book.

I felt myself cringe at his words, “I’m sorry for yelling at you Namjoon, I was out of line. Please forgive me.”

Namjoon raised an eyebrow before lifting his eyes up to look at me. He gauged my sincerity for a moment before sending me a dimpled smile.

“Of course I forgive you. It’s your job as our sister to test my patience, I guess.”

“Sister?” I said, tilting my head in confusion.

“Yeah. You’re like a little sister of sorts. And the rest of the boys are my brothers. We’re a family, Y/N. Families fight. But they also forgive. Now sit. Eat.” Namjoon said, nudging his plate of toast my way. I sat in the seat in between Namjoon and Hobi, happy to have my boys back.

“Where’s Jimin, by the way?” I asked casually as I munched on my toast. The boys normally all ate breakfast together in the morning.

“He left extra early today. He must be pretty busy because he seemed like he was in a rush to get to the park.” Hobi informed me.

“Yeah, he came home last night pretty late and he seemed absolutely drained. He looked upset as well.” Namjoon added before turning his attention back to his book.

“We should all go to Limbo again! Take a much needed break.” Hobi announced excitedly.

“I’m down!” I agreed eagerly. Maybe I could plan it so that Taehyung went that night as well. If I planned it right, I could spent half the night with the boys and half the night with Taehyung.

Speaking of Taehyung...

“Hey so, I actually need a essence suppressor for tonight.” I said, turning towards Hobi, trying to look as casual as I could.

“Oh, are you going to Limbo?” Hobi inquired, with a raise of an eyebrow.

“Yeah... another angel I met last time told me she was going tonight and asked me if I would join her.” I lied through my teeth. I had just apologized for lying yet here I was once again. It was beginning to worry me how good at it I was becoming.

“Oh, who?” Hobi pressed, genuinely interested.

I froze for a moment, panicking. I hadn’t thought this far ahead.

“Um, her name is Angelina.” I spoke finally, having said the first name that popped into my mind.

“Never head of her.” Hobi shrugged, scooping another spoonful of food into his mouth.

“She’s not anywhere near here.” I hummed, quickly shoving my mouth with another toast as if to silence myself before I could feed Hobi yet another lie.

“Cool. Well, I’d give you one of mine but I really can’t afford to lose another pill. It took me so long to save enough for the amount I have now. Literally an entire year.”

So that’s where all of Hobi’s left over money from his allowance went.

I pouted in disappointment but other wise understood; I swallowed my bread, “Dang it, I really need a supressor.”

Hobi gave me a sympathetic look before shrugging.

“Why don't you get it from Hobi’s drug guy.” Namjoon spoke up suddenly, his eyes not lifting from his book.

“Drug guy?” I frowned at the term, not liking what it implied.

“Why do you have to phrase it like that?” Hobi laughed.

“Because it’s a guy who sells drugs.” Namjoon retorted before sighing dramatically, “Poor Hobi has a drug problem.”

“Hobi, you do drugs?!” I gasped.

How in God’s name was Namjoon speaking so casually about this?

“No, I’m not some sort of druggie, relax. Joon, stop joking around, you know she doesn't pick up on your sarcasm. Anyway, the guy I get the suppressors from just happens to be a drug dealer.”

“Oh my God, he’s your drug dealer!”

Hobi rolled his eyes, “Don’t call him my drug dealer.”

“So he’s not drug dealer?” I questioned, suddenly confused.

“Well, no. He is a drug dealer.”

“What am I meant to call him then?” I huffed, annoyed at the pace of this conversation.

“He’s my plug.”

“Plug?” I furrowed my eyebrows, unfamiliar with the term in that context.

Hobi just nodded, “Yeah. Keep up with the modern slang, Y/N.”

I rolled my eyes which caused Hobi to laugh. I shifted in my seat.

“I don’t understand. How did you even find this... plug.”

“I take it back, don’t use that term. Sounds weird coming out of your mouth,” Hobi started once he had swallowed his food, “and stop asking so many questions, I’m not gonna take you to see him if you keep that up.”

I made a small noise of surprise, “You’ll take me to him?”

“That was another question.” He laughed before nodding to answer me.

“Ah, you’re the best!” I squealed, leaning over to give Hobi a tight hug. “When can we go?”

“Now if you want.” He shrugged.

I stood up from my seat immediately, “Oh, God. I’m gonna go get ready then!”

My nerves were already through the roof. If I was going to meet this infamous drug dealer then the last thing I wanted was him not to like me. Drugs and violence typically bled into one another, and I didn’t want to give him any reason to dislike me.

I dismissed Hobi and Namjoon quickly nd rushed to the stairs, bouncing with every step.

Walking into my room, I made my way over to my dresser. Opening the box that contained the money I had saved up, I pondered upon how much I should bring. Hobi had told me once that the essence suppressors were expensive and even though I only planned on buying maybe three or so, I couldn’t help but worry that I might not have enough.

Grabbing all of my remaining money, I began to get ready.

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Surprisingly, this drug dealer lived in a nice neighborhood. For some reason, I expected another sketchy entrance-to-Purgatory type of situation. Hobi explained to me that this guy made good money and could afford a nice home.

I thought that a drug dealer would want to draw as little attention to himself as possible, but then it occurred to me that his clients were probably all supernatural and capable of hiding their tracks.

Hobi stopped in front of a house and made his way to it’s door. I followed him cautiously, stopping behind him as he knocked on the door.

Within moment, I heard the door unlock and swing open.

“Oh, hey Hoseok.” A voice greeted from ahead of Hobi. I poked my head from behind Hobi’s back to see who this infamous drug dealer was.

My eyes grew wide.

“Y/N?”

Jin’s expression mirrored mine, wide eyed in disbelief.

“Jin?” I responded, unable to understand how literally everyone in my life somehow lead back to Taehyung. Even if I had wanted to distance myself from him, I genuinely couldn’t.

“Woah, what? You guys know each other?” Hobi said, his eyes flickering between both Jin and I.

“Yeah, we met at Limbo.” I said automatically, Jin’s eyes never leaving mine.

There was no doubt. I hadn’t taken a suppressor today; he could see that I was an angel.

I felt my throat close up.

Jin now knew that Taehyung was a demon and that I was an angel. And with one slip of the tongue, Hobi could find out as well.

“Oh, you were there that night, Seokjin? Shame I didn’t see you, we could’ve hung out.” Hobi said, completely oblivious to the thick tension that surrounded Jin and I.

I stepped behind Hobi to hide myself, trying to control my now erratic breathing.

He had seen my panties in his best friend’s dryer so he clearly aware of the fact that Taehyung and I had that kind of relationship. And now I had just waltzed to his door with another angel to ask him for the very thing I had used to lie to him.

How in God’s name did my life come to this?

“It’s fine. I was with some friends you wouldn’t have wanted to get involved with anyway.” I heard Jin’s voice ring out.

Even if Hobi stood between us, Jin’s voice ran right through me, resonating deeply. Of course he disapproved. I didn’t doubt for a moment that half demons knew the implications of an angel and demon being involved with one another.

My body was suddenly yanked away from my hiding spot as Hobi pulled me into his side so that I could face Jin.

“Well, Y/N is an interested buyer in those essence suppressors I get from you.”

“I bet she is.” Jin stated through a tight-lipped smile. I blushed at his snarky comment, my eyes falling to the floor.

I heard the sound of Jin shuffling and I look up to see that he had moved from his doorway, inviting us in.

I followed Hobi in cautiously, wanting to be anywhere but here. It wasn’t that I thought Jin was going to tell Hobi about Taehyung and I, but the possibility certainly made me sick to my stomach.

Jin’s house was beautifully decorated on the inside; he had a clear preference for marble and white when it came to interior design. The house itself wasn't extraordinarily big, but it was still a good size and it was clear that money had been invested into it.

Hoseok sat down on the couch in the living room and I followed suit, taking in everything around me. Jin had a top notch speaker system, along with an enormous television that I couldn’t imagine any human lifting on their own.

It seemed like his house had everything he could ever want, so I found it curious that he chose to spend his time over at Taehyung’s small apartment.

Did he live alone? Perhaps, he was lonely.

Jin stared down at me.

“How many?” He said bluntly. I clearly wasn’t in his favor today.

“However much this will get me.” I replied quietly. Reaching into my pocket, I showed him how much money I had on me. Jin looked at the currency for a moment before meeting my eyes again.

“So... one.” Jin stated.

I blushed, embarrassed at how foolish I must have looked coming all this way for a single suppressor.

“Yes.” I said extending my money towards him. Hobi quickly interjected.

“Woah, give him the money after you get the product. Haven’t you ever hustled before?” Hobi laughed easily, clearly familiar with how these exchanges usually worked.

“You don’t trust me Hoseok?” Jin smirked at the orange-haired boy, suddenly in a better mood.

Hobi grinned, “You say half demon, I say half scum-bag.”

I widened my eyes in horror at Hobi insulting Jin, but to my surprise Jin just laughed in response. Jin proved to be good spirited regardless of the situation.

Jin told us that he would be back and headed off into a hallway to his left.

“How long have you and Jin known each other?” I immediately asked Hobi, once we were alone.

“Mm, probably a little under a year. He had just moved here when I ran into him. Said he was getting away from his family, or something like that. I would’ve introduced you all but he’s part demon, you know. How long have you known him? I’ve never heard of him going by Jin.”

“First time I met him was that night at Limbo. He just introduced himself as Jin.”

Besides, Taehyung and his friends all referred to him as Jin so it had solidified in my mind. Not that I was planning on telling Hobi about Taehyung or any of his friends.

It was looking as if Jin had no intention on telling Hobi about Taehyung and I, but I still felt like I needed to verify with Jin himself.

Jin came back rather quickly, a small clear baggy with a familiar white pill inside.

“You want to smell it to make sure it’s the real deal or are you good?” Jin teased, causing Hobi to roll his eyes.

“I guess I’ll trust you this one time.” He sighed dramatically.

And with that, the baggy was placed onto my palm and I gave Jin the money I had promised him. I almost couldn’t wrap my mind around how expensive one little pill was.

“Oh, can I borrow your bathroom before we go?” Hobi asked politely to which Jin nodded.

Hobi didn’t bother asking for directions as he got up and walked to what I could only assume was the hallway that led to the bathroom. He had clearly been here before.

Suddenly, I became painfully aware of the fact that Jin and I had been left alone, and by the look on his face, he clearly wasn’t in the mood to talk.

Still, I needed to make sure Taehyung and I’s secret was safe.

“He doesn’t know.” I started meekly, unsure about how to go about this conversation.

“Who? Tae or Hoseok?” Jin quipped back immediately, the judgment in his voice evident.

I flinched at his tone and at what he was implying– that I was using the essence suppressors to lie to Taehyung so that he wouldn’t know I was an angel.

“Hoseok. Actually, no one really knows. The only person that knows about Taehung and I is Yoongi and, well, now you.”

Jin said nothing in reply, which caused my uneasiness to grow.

“I’m not gonna tell Hoseok if that’s what you’re thinking.” Jin stated after a moment of me just staring at him.

Panicking, I shook my head. I needed to stop angering him.

“No! Uh, that’s not what I meant to–”

“I’m sure you and Tae already know how stupid it is what it is you guys are doing, so there’s no need for me to make your situation any more complicated. You already have a shit storm coming for you, I’m sure.”

I fell silent as I took in what Jin said.

“I love him.” I thought out loud, staring at the clear bag on my lap.

Jin blinked at me, saying nothing.

Looking up, I met his eyes, “We want to make this work. There has to be a way. I know we probably both look so incredibly foolish to you but I have to believe that this isn’t a mistake. I’m sacrificing everything to be with him so I have to believe that all this is worth it. He loves me.”

Still he said nothing and I felt myself sink into my seat.

“Wouldn’t you do anything for love?” I frowned.

I watched as Jin’s expression softened a bit; perhaps it was the human in him that sympathized with me a little.

“Yeah. I would.” He replied in a softer tone, suddenly growing somber. I wasn’t sure how to reply to that so I didn’t and we stood in silence until Hobi returned from the restroom.

“Come on, my fellow druggie. Let’s get a move on. I’m sure Jin has other things to do today.” Hoseok waved me over, standing by Jin’s front door.

I jumped to my feet quickly, rushing over to Hobi, more than ready to leave.

“I’ll see you whenever I see you, I guess.” Hobi told Jin casually with a small shrug of his shoulders.

“If you ever decide to delve into human drugs, you know my hours.” Jin replied, a small smirk on his full lips.

I frowned automatically, but Hobi just laughed him off before waving him goodbye and walked out the door.

I paused behind Hobi to give Jin a small but grateful nod, which he returned. Whatever his opinions were, we had seemed to reach a small but silent agreement, and I trusted him not to tell anyone. With a small ‘goodbye,’ I walked out of Jin’s house and shut the door behind me.

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I had managed to slip away from Hobi by claiming that I wanted to explore the city and help some people. Thankfully, Hobi had a job to do elsewhere and left me without a hesitation.

I did actually end up roaming around the city and helping a few humans. I had been spending so much time with Taehyung lately that I had almost completely forgotten about my angelic duties. It was funny to think that this is what once completely consumed my mind.

When the afternoon rolled around however, I made my way back into town, Taehyung’s apartment lay just on the outskirts of it, helping to blend the town into the busy city.

As the elevator took me up to the thirteenth floor, I couldn’t help but feel the familiar rush of excitement that came whenever I knew I was going to see Taehyung. I wondered for a moment if this feeling would ever go away.

I lay a knock on the door, and to my surprise, the door swung open before my knuckle could come down to press another knock onto it.

“You came!” Taehyung exclaimed happily, a boyish smile on his face. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me in for a hug.

I laughed at his boundless energy.

“O-Of course I came.” I stuttered, as his mouth had wasted no time into trailing kisses down my neck.

“If you didn’t come, I was going to go get you anyway.” He admitted with a chuckle, a hand grabbing onto my hair, pulling my head back so that he had better access to my neck.

“Taehyung...” I sighed, “Are you home alone?”

“Kind of. Yoongi is in his room.”

Immediately, I shoved Taehyung off of me. Of all the people who knew of my existence, the last person that I wanted to know I was here was Yoongi. The last time I saw him I had literally threatened to fight him; there was no way I was actually going to follow through, especially now that I was the one who intruded into his home.

“Why are you so scared of Yoongi? So what if he doesn’t like you? He’s not gonna confront you about it. He’s harmless; he mainly keeps to himself and sleeps.” Taehyung frowned, reaching for me once again. I stepped back to counteract his movements.

Taehyung was cute, but he was incredibly naive. This image of Yoongi that he had clearly didn’t exist as Yoongi had absolutely no problem in stomping into my house just to tell me how much he disliked me.

“Ever heard of the expression ‘Don’t poke the sleeping bear?’ That applies to Yoongi.” I told him adamantly, refusing to back down on this one. My life was complicated enough, if I went around aggravating the vampire who already hated my guts, then I was just asking for more trouble.

“Whatever.” Taehyung huffed, making his way towards the the couch. I followed him and sat down on it.

“I have snacks in the kitchen that I’m gonna go bring over. Look through these movies and pick one.” Taehyung told me happily, gesturing towards the display of DVDs that lay on the coffee table in front of the couch.

“Okay!” I told him as he left for the kitchen, peering down at the different films.

Angels weren’t very big on movies. They were fascinating and all, but they only took up time that we could be utilizing to helping humans. I couldn’t remember the last time I sat down to watch a movie. I was excited to do so.

“Put on your Purgy eyes, by the way.” I heard Taehyung’s voice call out as he walked away.

Oh, I had forgotten!

I reached into my pocket in search of the small baggy I had gotten earlier today but frowned when my hand came back up empty handed. Reaching into my other pockets, I felt myself start to panic as they, too, proved to be empty.

How had I lost it? Did I drop it? Oh God, how could I be so careless!

I let out a groan at my own stupidity. Leave it to me to spend all my money on one measly pill, only for me to lose it.

I frowned at the cover of a movie that lay in front of me.

‘Charlotte’s Web’ it read. I wasn’t sure who Charlotte was but I was pretty sure I had her beat when it came to whose life was more of an entangled web.

The sudden sound of the front door opening snapped me out of my thoughts and I watched as Jin walked in. He met me with wide eyes.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” He asked quickly, his eyes flickering across the room, probably for Taehyung.

“Good to see you again. I’m spending the night.” I told him, politely.

“Y/N is here? Hell yeah!” I heard a voice call out from behind Jin. Before I could pin a name to the voice, Jungkook poked his head out from behind Jin, meeting my eyes directly.

Only this time, I hadn’t taken an essence suppressor. This time, when his eyes met mine, they no longer held that playful twinkle that they usually did.

I watched in horror as his eyes and entire demeanor turned dark, something carnal and forbidding taking over.

“Oh, fuck.” Jungkook all but growled.

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acest-of-them-all · 6 years

Text

So now story time bc today is the day I became extremely sure I am asexual

So. Let's go waaay back to when I was a kid and had no idea there was other sexualities than straight. Obviously I assumed I was gonna have a boyfriend sometime. I didn't really think about it, though. It wasn't relevant because I was a kid and I had other worries like what will I play with my friends during the breaks between classes.

When I was about 13-14, I had discovered the fact that there were not only straight people, but also gays, lesbians and bisexuals. I was like hey, girls are nice, I would date a girl as well as a boy. So I labeled mhself as a bisexual. Now, I hadn't had any real crushes(I now have realized), only a few people I had taken interest in, so I didn't really know how attraction to another person felt like.

When I was about 14 years old or when I was turning 15, I wasn't so sure about my gender anymore. I didn't feel good in my body, and I hated it so, so much. I had more knowledge of sexualities and genders, so I began to wonder, if what I was experiencing was me being transgender. I was kind of suspicious though, because the feeling came so late, and not as a child already. But I knew that the gut-wrenching feeling that made me want to throw up I got when someone called me a girl, was very real. I was convinced I was a transgender, and I was fine with that. It still hurt though, when after two years of feeling horrible dysphoria with my body I told my mom that I was pretty sure I was trans, she still would address me and my sister as "girls" when talking of both of us. I never got the chance to tell my father, though. At some point, I realized that I might not be able to go through the surgeries, as the places I could do that were quite far away, and I didn't know how expensive it was gonna be. Soon, I was fine with that, too, because I realized that my discomfort in my body being female was fading. I was so confused. I had felt like a boy for the last two years and now I suddenly felt like wearing more makeup and dressing more femininely?? I was like huh. I was a fake after all.

At the same time I started to realize that I didn't feel the desire to become close to people. I thought I was somehow incorrectly developed, that it would come to me later, so I didn't really pay attention to it.

Now, in the spring, this year. My first year of vocational school was almost over. We had photography, and I was sitting at my computer on my phone, because I had already edited all the photos I had taken and nothing else to do. There was this guy, that I knew my friend knew, sitting at the computer next to me. He wasn't in our class(he was on his second year). He asked about what we had been doing, which I found weird, because I didn't know this dude, but I just awkwardly answered him. We conversed for a while, and he offered to show me how the studio lights and flashes work. I accepted, because yeah, I had nothing else to do. Well. He showed me how they worked, I was quite awkward all the time, and he asked about stuff. One thing he asked was if I had ever kissed anyone. I obviously hadn't, so I answered no. He asked if I wanted to try. I was confused and I kind of panicked so I accepted. I was tense and nervous and confused, and he told me to relax and close my eyes. I slapped my hand over my eyes, because I couldn't bring myself to close them, I was so nervous. I was just standing there, tense as hell, as he kissed me. Or tried to. It didn't go well, as I kept my lips tightly together and I was panicking. He told me I had to relax, to which I repeatedly told him that I wasn't capable of that. That was followed by him letting it go and us both apologizing for making things awkward. The whole thing was like straight out of a fanfiction. Except that if it was a fanfiction, I wouldn't have been an already suspecting ace, I would have magically been able to kiss him back and we'd have banged in the studio. Yeah, no. I didn't really see him after that, which I was pretty relieved of, because now I wouldn't have to deal with awkward shit! At that point I was almost completely sure I was ace and aro, because I didn't feel like romantic relationships were really my thing and the idea of me having sex with someone, to be completely honest, disgusted me. I had also found a term that I felt like it fit my gender: genderfluid. My preferred gender tends to change quite slowly, I can feel really feminine for months, or really masculine for, apparently, years. Sometimes it's one of those, but in between happens too. Currently I am leaning a little bit on the feminine side.

Anyways. This fall. Summer was over, my second year of school started. And I get to live alone, which is super awesome! One day, after like two weeks of school, the guy texts me(we had exchanged our numbers back then), asking how I'd been. We talked about stuff, it was casual and cool. He's pretty nice, since he likes memes and listens to good music. I told him that I lived alone, and he joked about coming to ruin my peaceful isolated life. I was like yeah, you can come over sometime if you want to, because sometimes some company isn't too bad. The next monday he came to hang out, and it was cool. We listened to music, showed each other memes and all, and I was relieved it wasn't awkward(I had done research on the internet on how to carry on with a conversation before he arrived lmao). Then he left and everything was well in the kingdom. A week or two went by, he would occasionally text me and yeah. It was cool and I was like whoa did I manage to make a friend.

Until.

The day before yesterday(saturday). He texted me like usual and asked if I wanted to hang out on sunday, but because I wouldn't have had any time, we agreed to hang out on monday. A.k.a. today. And then he asked if I still couldn't kiss. And I was like ooohh nooooo, and said that no, I can't because who the hell would my ace ass I have been kissing? He was like well do you want to try on monday and internally I was like WHY??? DON'T YOU REMEMBER HOW AWKWARD IT WAS??? And because I figured that the sooner he realizes I'm a hopeless case, the sooner he leaves me alone with the kissing stuff(and because my idiot brain is like BUT WHAT IF YOU'RE A FAKE ACE??? WHAT IF YOU DO LIKE IT HMMM?!? and I wanted to be sure), I was like uuuhhh sure I guess. I warned him that I was most likely going to be awkward as hell AGAIN, but he just told me to "relax and enjoy". Which confused me because I simply do not see the appeal of having other person's tongue shoved down your throat, but I let it be.

So he came over. We conversed for a while, then browsed memes again(which meant we were both sitting on my bed). Soon he was like sooo about the kissing and I was like oh god oh god what do I do, so my brain switched into "scientific experiment" mode, and I was like yeah, I only need to think of this as an experiment on what kissing feels like and everything would be fine. So he told me to get in his lap and I was just confused as hell and was like uuhhh do I have to like do something, to which he answered that not really. And then he kissed me. And his tongue was in my mouth. It didn't taste like anything, it felt weird and I was just kind of trying to not be too awkward, trying to somehow respond to it. He asked how it was and I was like weird, not the most unpleasant thing but nothing special either. And we ended up lying down and kind of cuddling on my bed, which was okay. I was just making random comments about like how babies have more bones than adults and at some point I was like do you wanna take a nap, naps are nice, to which he agreed. It wasn't a nap though. He kissed me some more and yeah. At some point though he had to leave, so he did. And that's when it really hit me. I felt really unhygienic and weirded out. I still could taste his tongue, which is why I brushed my teeth twice in a row. The taste wouldn't go away! I ate, and I noticed I was terribly aware of my own tongue in my mouth. I could still smell his deodorant or whatever it was, and now it wasn't even nice anymore, it was disturbing and overwhelming. I couldn't even drink from my bottle normally because of the way it feels! I brushed my teeth one more time and put my clothes at my window to air out, I don't want them to smell like him. I went and scrubbed myself under a practically boiling shower, I think I've never been so thorough when showering. I'm still confused. Why do I feel so disgusted and unclean, when clothes weren't even reduced? Apparently it doesn't need much. But if mere kissing makes me like this, I can't even imagine myself in even a slightly more intimate situation. Just, no. If he wants to do that again, I gotta tell him that kissing definitely isn't my thing, maybe just straight up tell him that I'm asexual. At least now I'm sure about it lol

#sorry for the rant #sorry for the long post #personal #i just wanted to tell this #asexual #aromantic #lgbtq #lgbt #lgbtqa

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sindrafalcone · 7 years

Text

The Mom Ch. 8

Fandom: BIGBANG/ Choi Seung Hyun

Synopsis: Truce

Warnings: I’ll go ahead and rate this one PG-13. I mean, it does get a little steamy in the middle, but nothing worse than something you’d read in a Harlequin romance novel. lol (It’s very reminiscent of “The Girlfriend Ch.1″) Nothing explicit, I promise.

Author’s Note: I realize that all of my Nannyverse readers have been extremely patient with me. You guys have waited an extra week for this update & haven’t complained one bit. You are simply the best followers out there! <3 I hope you find this chapter worth the wait.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. This story contains fictional representations of real people. None of the events are true. This is from an American standpoint, so some of the situations may not happen the same way they might in Korea. I make no money from the writing of this fictional work.

Masterlist

It wasn't too long after all the drama that everyone had said their goodbyes and gone home. But before leaving, you all made plans to have another dinner since you'd declared that this one had been all but ruined by the sudden appearance of your sister.

As he shut the door after his family left, Seung Hyun had turned back around and leveled you with a thoughtful look. You'd expected him to interrogate you about the conversation you'd had with her, but instead he just wordlessly took your hand & led you to the stairs.

“Where are we...?” you started to ask, but didn't get to finish.

“You didn't get the chance to feed the twins before they fell asleep.” he explained as you walked up the stairs, still hand in hand. “If you don't do it now, they'll wake up at some ungodly hour starving and screaming.” he flashed you a smile.

He was right of course. You were surprised you hadn't thought of that yourself, but all the emotions of the day had your mind muddled. You finally reached the top of the stairs and headed for the nursery. Looking into the cribs, you couldn't help but smile at the sight of the twins sleeping peacefully. Today had been rough, but if you had guaranteed that their horrible 'aunt' would never show up in their lives again, it was worth it.

Seung Hyun let go of your hand to reach into one crib and gently lift Sung Ja out. Once he had her cradled in his arms, he nodded silently to the rocker in the corner. Taking the hint, you went over to it and prepared to feed your daughter. When he'd successfully transferred her over to you, he went back to get Seung Min and went over to the changing table to handle diaper duty.

With Sung Ja latched and feeding, still in her sleep, you watched Seung Hyun deal with his son. He was such a good father when he was home. Even after he'd been gone for months, it was like he seamlessly fell back into his role. Not for the first time, you thanked your lucky stars that your husband wanted to be an active participant in raising his children.

When he was done changing Seung Min, he came over to sit on the ottoman at your feet. Seung Hyun softly hummed under his breath in an attempt to keep the twins from waking up & you recognized it as one of the songs he'd recorded for their lullaby album.

He bounced Seung Min lightly in his arms, amazed at the miracle that he and his princess had created. He had never dreamed that being a husband and a father could make him this happy. Staring at his son, he suddenly found himself wishing you were pregnant again, another little life growing within you.

You interrupted his thoughts to switch babies with him & he carefully took Sung Ja from you so he could burp her. Unfortunately, doing that made the baby girl wake up slightly and she stared at her father with sleep-heavy eyes.

“Appa...” she babbled, grabbing at her father’s nose.

Smiling with great pride, Seung Hyun held his daughter out in front of him him, studying her face and seeing so much of you in her. It warmed him clear to his toes. The two of you definitely needed to have another one. Or two...

“Uh-uh... Thing One.” he gently reprimanded her, standing to take her over to the changing table. “It's time to sleep now.”

When he had a fresh diaper on her, he wrapped Sung Ja back up tightly and went back to singing while pacing the room and bouncing her in his arms, making her drift back off in no time. Soon enough, you'd finished with Seung Min and burped him yourself. Then the two of you laid the twins back into their respective cribs... mission accomplished.

Seung Hyun slowly made his way to you, his hand silently reaching out to take yours. He quietly led you across the hall and into your shared bedroom. Opening the door, he brought you inside, sweet anticipation building now that the two of you were finally alone. Closing the door behind him, Seung Hyun shoved his hands in his pockets as he watched his wife move across the room and start to turn down the bed, pulling the covers down in preparation for sleep.

As he slowly began to walk towards you, his eyes raked over the skin left exposed by your skirt, appreciating the way the hem lightly grazed your thighs, allowing a generous view of your legs. The more he watched you, the more he wanted you. And now that he finally had you all to himself, he wasn’t going to waste another moment.

You turned around to find Seung Hyun standing right behind you, his lips instantly against yours as he wrapped you up in his strong arms. You fought down the moan that rose in your throat as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

He backed you up towards the adjoined bathroom, stopping only to pick up the receiver for the baby monitor from the nightstand so he could bring it with him. Seung Hyun didn't waste any time as he lifted you up, depositing you on the counter top next to the sink. Kicking his slippers off, he quickly moved against you, his mouth plundering yours as he touched every place he possibly could, the intimate contact not nearly enough.

He wanted so much more, wanted to feel and kiss every single inch of you, to hear you breathlessly crying his name.

You gasped as your husband raked his teeth over your collarbone, his hands pulling the straps of your dress down. Your hands moved over him as well, rising desperation taking over as you tugged his shirt free from his pants, your fingers sneaking up beneath the fabric to explore and stroke the muscular planes of his back.

“________-ah...” he moaned, your fingernails lightly scraping over his skin. “I propose a truce...”

In answer to his suggestion, your hands moved to firmly grip his backside, squeezing him before sliding around to the front of his pants. Your fingers made quick work of his belt buckle, swiftly removing the strip of leather and flinging it across the room without even looking or caring where it had landed.

Seung Hyun pressed his forehead against your shoulder as your fingers slipped inside to grip him, stroking him and taking his breath away like only you could. His mouth began to attack you then, his teeth sinking into your skin as his mouth sealed around it, causing you to hiss with pleasure.

“Seung Hyun...” you gasped, arching your back as he rolled his hips firmly against yours. He was definitely going to be leaving his mark on you quite a bit tonight. Of course, you were never innocent in that regard either, if the fingernail scratches you almost always left on his back were any indication.

At first, you had felt so guilty about the marks and scratches that you left on him after your passionate love making, but Seung Hyun had quickly reassured you that he adored it and was proud to bear your mark, the visible proof of just how good he was able to make you feel.

He suddenly yanked your hand from his pants, intertwining your fingers together, the faint clink of your wedding bands echoing in the bathroom. “You better stop, gognju-nim.” he rasped. “Or this will be over before we’ve really gotten started.”

You chuckled softly, using your feet to push his pants down his hips. “Then you better get to work, naui wangja.” you breathlessly threatened him.

He quickly pulled you from the counter and slipped the dress down your body, kissing his way down to your neck and unhooking your bra. You arched your back again as his mouth descended downwards, bracing one hand against the counter top for support since your knees were already going weak.

You raked the fingers of the other hand through his hair, tilting your head back as he stole your breath away. Seung Hyun was rapidly setting your body on fire with his heated ministrations, your mind awash with the pure euphoria flooding it.

Suddenly pulling away, he knelt down & tugged your lace panties off, a smug smirk forming on his lips. “You have no idea how much you tortured me when I found that red thong in my suitcase.” he told you, breathing heavily as he began planting hot, wet kisses along your thigh, pausing to pay special attention to your hip bone.

“So you liked it?” you managed to gasp out.

“Very…very…much…” he hummed against your skin, sending a vibration of pleasure jolting through you.

He finally kissed his way back up your body, your hands moving to grip his shirt and ripping it open. Buttons pinged across the tiled floor and you yanked the fabric down his arms. The torn material went sailing through the air to join the belt you assumed, but you really weren't sure & you couldn't bring yourself to care.

Seung Hyun growled something almost feral as he began to assault your throat, kissing his way to your ear. “I liked that shirt.”

“I’ll buy you a new one.” you murmured, grabbing hold of his face and bringing his mouth to yours.

His boxers quickly shared his shirt’s fate, disappearing somewhere across the room. He ran his hands down your arms, drawing them away from his body and up over your head & holding them in place with a firm grip. His mouth descended on your body like a starving man denied food for weeks, anxious for everything that you had to offer him.

He ran his other hand down the length of your arms before caressing your skin again, stroking and massaging until you were arching and writhing from his touch alone, your breathing became labored with a constant string of moans spilling from your lips.

“Seung Hyun...” you gasped. You managed pull one wrist free from his grasp with a frantic need to touch him again as well.

“No, gongju-nim.” he huskily murmured in your ear, capturing your hand that had settled on his back and pulling it back up to join the other one. He wrapped his fingers around your wrists again. “This is all about you right now.”

“But…but…!” you managed to get out between breaths, tightening your hands into fists as he continued to stoke your fierce need for him. “But you…what about you?”

You were quickly silenced by his lips on yours, his tongue stroking your mouth, your taste driving his need even higher. “Pleasing you…pleases me…more than you know…”

His free hand found your thigh, caressing your smooth skin before drawing your knees even further apart. Seung Hyun rolled his hips against you, eliciting a sharp gasp at the feel of him. He smirked as he kissed behind your ear, raking his teeth over the sensitive skin there.

He could feel the sweet tension in your muscles as you squirmed, biting your bottom lip. “Yeobo…please…” you panted. “I…I…need... I have to touch you…please…!”

“Not yet, _______-ah.” he smirked against your throat as he continued to deliciously torture you, his sure fingers caressing and stroking you into a heated frenzy.

He felt you begin to shudder and tremble before him, your teeth digging into your lower lip as you moved. Seung Hyun finally felt like he had worked you up enough and, with surprising gentleness, he let you go and pulled you into the shower along with him.

“You’re amazing, ______-ah…” he breathed heavily, fighting to calm the hammering of his heart. “No one will ever love you…as much I love you.”

You smiled softly as you gazed into his beautiful brown eyes, bringing your hand up to caress his face. “I hope you never forget how much I truly love you, Choi Seung Hyun.”

He smiled in return, his lips finding yours as he began to worship you all over again. It wasn't until he was buried inside you, the warm water cascading over your entwined bodies, that you began to feel the stress of today completely melt away.

A few days later, you were surprised by an unexpected text from Dong Wook. Technically he was still your boss, but you hadn't heard anything from him in months, not since shortly after you'd done the magazine photoshoot.

Are you free for dinner tomorrow? I have some things I'd like to discuss with you.

You paused for a moment to think about his question & realized that Seung Hyun had a dinner date that night as well with an art acquaintance of some sort... he'd said something about helping to curate a new exhibit.

Um... let me see if I can find a sitter and I'll get back to you. You texted back.

Excellent, I'll be waiting. Se7en replied.

Unsurprisingly, your mother-in-law was all too willing to come over and look after the twins for a few hours.

Can we make it an early meal? I can't keep Eomma up too late. You sent him.

Of course.

You settled on a time of 4:00 and he sent you the address of the restaurant. After a quick internet search, you realized that you wouldn't be able to get away with wearing something that qualified as 'Business Casual'. The place was extremely fancy.

You'd cornered Seung Hyun as soon as he got home, making him come up to the bedroom to help you pick out something suitable to wear. You were perfectly capable of choosing your own outfit, but there was something inherently sexy about having him do it for you.

“What does he want to talk to you about?” your husband asked as the thumbed through the hangers on your side of the closet.

“I have no idea.” you admitted, mirroring his actions & perusing through his clothes. Seung Hyun had agreed to pick your outfit only if you would return the favor. “He didn't specify. But I'm assuming that it has something to do with work.”

Seung Hyun grunted noncommittally as he pulled a cream colored, cashmere coat off the rack. “I don't remember buying you a Valentino.” he said, brow furrowed.

You glanced over your shoulder to see what he was holding. “That's because you didn't, yeobo.” you chuckled. “That was a gift.”

“Jiyong?”

“Goofball, actually.” you smiled, turning back to look through Seung Hyun's suits.

“Hmmm... surprisingly, this isn't that bad. But I'm not sure how I feel about those two always buying my wife clothes.” he mused.

“I can't help it that they like to spoil their sister. Besides, it's not like they have girlfriends of their own to buy clothes for.”

“Mmph.” he huffed in agreement. “Daesung doesn't buy you clothes and he doesn't have a girlfriend.”

You snorted. “Daesungie barely buys himself clothes.”

The two of you shared a laugh at that while you finished choosing outfits for one another.

A few hours later, you were slipping into that Valentino coat as you prepared to head out the door. Seung Hyun had ultimately settled on a green, satin wrap dress with champagne colored heels. You adjusted the coat and kissed the twins goodbye as he handed you a clutch purse that matched the heels perfectly.

“Have a good time, ________-ah. I love you.” Seung Hyun said, kissing you on the cheek so you wouldn't smudge your lipstick.

“I love you too, Seung Hyun. I'll see you when you get home.” you walked out the door with a bounce in your step, happy to get out of the house and feel like a proper adult for a while.

You'd met Dong Wook at the restaurant and after placing your order, you got straight to business.

“So... what is it that you want to discuss?” you asked bluntly, as soon as the waiter walked away.

“Wow.” he smiled. “You don't beat around the bush, do you?”

“Well, you sounded so eager to talk about whatever it was in your texts. I figured once we got that out of the way, we could move on to pleasantries.” you arched an eyebrow at your boss.

Se7en sighed heavily. “I want you to come back to work.”

“Excuse me?” you asked in disbelief. You had honestly been expecting the news that he'd hired someone new to replace you, not that he wanted you to come back so soon.

He held up a hand to placate you. “Just... hear me out, okay?”

You simply nodded and motioned for him to continue.

“I'm not talking about full time. I was thinking maybe you coming in to the office one day every other week.” he paused to judge your reaction, but you didn't give him one. “Anything else could be done through telecommuting. I don't need you to edit or anything. It's just that you're really the best at understanding what I want when I come up with a concept. Really all I need you to do is set up the design for the shoot and direct a little.”

“Dong Wook, we discussed this before I went on maternity leave.” you said. “I told you that I wanted to take at least a year off. It's barely been six months.”

“I know.” he winced. “But you know I wouldn't ask if I didn't really need your skills right now. The quality of our photo shoots has seriously gone downhill since you left.”

You sighed, mulling it over. You didn't really want to leave the twins, not even for only two days a month. But, on the other hand, getting out of the house and back on the job might be nice.

“I'll even hire someone so that you can bring the twins into work with you, if you want.” he offered with a smile.

“Really?” you asked in surprise & he nodded hopefully. He must honestly need your help if he was willing to go to that expense to get you to come back. “I... I'll think about it.”

“Great!”

“But I'll have to talk it over with Seung Hyun first.” you said quickly.

“Of course! Of course... take all the time you need.” Se7en told you.

It wasn't long after that when your food arrived and the two of you resigned yourselves to more friendly conversation.

You were sitting in the back of the car on your way back to the villa when you got a text from your husband.

We are definitely discussing this when I get home, gongju-nim.

He had attached a link to a news website & you clicked it, only to find a picture of you and Dong Wook, kissing each others cheek as you'd arrived at the restaurant. The title read, “Trouble in Paradise Already?”

You fought back a smirk as you sent your response. I would have been more shocked if we didn’t.

They certainly work fast these days, don't they? Are you doing okay?

I’m fine. And don’t bother with the discussion when we get home. You know I always win.

You could practically hear Seung Hyun snort in reply & that made you smile to yourself.

I believe we already have a war going on that is still unfinished. he texted back.

I thought you’d forgotten all about it. What happened to our truce?

Oh, yeobo... that was only good for last night. The fight is most certainly back on... he replied quickly.

You smiled to yourself as the car pulled up to the house. It was going to be a long night while you waited for Seung Hyun to come home so you could continue your battle of sexual wills.

It was well into the night before Seung Hyun finally managed to make it back to the villa. To tell the truth, he was more than a little annoyed that dinner had taken as long as it had.

Stopping by the nursery, he quietly opened the door and entered to find his children fast asleep in their cribs. Seung Min had his favorite stuffed rabbit grasped tightly in his little fist. Yeon Jun had given it to him when he was four months old and it hadn’t left his side since then.

Kissing his son on the forehead & then repeating the action with his daughter (who was clinging to a panda plushie), Seung Hyun left, making his way to his own room. Silently opening the door, he found his wife sound asleep in the bed.

You were a vision of beauty to him, curled up on your side with your arms wrapped around one of his pillows. You were hugging it close as if it were him, making Seung Hyun smile to himself. He was growing more than anxious to replace that pillow in your arms.

He softly made his way to the bed, lifting the covers and carefully crawling in next to you. He gently pried the pillow from you grasp, your soft sleepy murmur of his name like a sudden bolt of electricity shooting through him.

As much as he longed to kiss you awake and make love to you right now, you needed your sleep and he was exhausted. He just wanted to curl up around your body, hold you close and drift off into much needed oblivion.

Tomorrow morning, however, would be a different story if he had his way. He hoped to get a little one-on-one time with you before you each started your day, preferably with you pinned between him and the mattress.

“Seung Hyun?” you sleepily murmured as you quickly snuggled up against his muscular frame, releasing a contented sigh as you molded yourself against him. “How was dinner?”

“Fine…go back to sleep, gongju-nim.” he gently said, tilting down to kiss the top of your head.

“No, I want to know how it went.” you insisted, your voice still sounding drowsy as you slid your arm around his waist, holding him closer to you. “What kind of exhibit do they want your help with?”

Seung Hyun eagerly wrapped his arms around you and held you securely against him, keeping you where he always wanted you, where he always needed you to be, right by his side.

“Something a little different than last time.” he told you cryptically as he absentmindedly rubbed your back, relishing the feel of your frame against his, your familiar scent already comforting him.

“Oh, so not an auction?” you asked, tilting your head back to rest against his shoulder so you could look at him.

“No. Not an auction. Just an exhibition.” he murmured, his mind refusing to allow him to rest despite how exhausted he was.

Your eyes narrowed suspiciously as you reached up to rub the remnants of red lipstick from his cheek. You had known that he was having dinner with one of his exes, but it couldn't be helped since she was the main curator of the museum he was to be working with. “I see she didn't waste any time...”

Seung Hyun could hear the jealous edge to your voice, but you never had anything to worry about. “It was nothing…I promise.” he swore. “You know her, _______-ah. She always likes to push the boundaries, see how far she can go in order to get a reaction.”

“It obviously didn’t take much tonight.” you curtly replied.

You knew you shouldn’t let it get to you, but she was the only one of Seung Hyun's many exes that always seemed to make your blood boil. You didn’t know if it was the fact that she was so seductive and beautiful or that she was more entrenched in the Seoul art scene than you had ever managed to get. Either way, you didn’t like how she continued to try to seduce him every chance she got, despite the fact that he was happily married.

Seung Hyun captured your hand resting on his chest, bringing it to his lips to place kiss on your knuckles. He tightened his hold on you and rubbed soothing circles on your back with his other hand.

“Yeobo, you know she means nothing to me.” he promised. “She provided me with some information about what the museum wanted while we ate dinner, kissed me on the cheek, and then left the restaurant.”

“I know…it’s not you, Seung Hyun.” you admitted. “It’s her that I don’t trust. She’s never kept her intentions hidden when it comes to you and it’s obvious that she wants you back.”

“She can do or say whatever she wants, but you’re the one I love…the only one I want,” he told you.

You tilted your head and kissed his chest, wanting to change the subject. “Tell me about the exhibit.” you pressed. “What information did she provide? Was it anything that will help you choose pieces for the gallery?”

“Maybe...” Seung Hyun stalled as he slid his fingers up into your hair, his eyes focused on the ceiling as he thought back over the events of the night. “But I want to hear about your meeting. What did Dong Wook want?”

“He wants me to come back to work.” you told him.

You tilted your head back up and watched as your husband’s eyes immediately darkened with anger, his face locking into that fierce look that always managed to frighten others, but not you.

“He what?” he nearly hissed as he attempted to process what you had just told him.

“He wants me to come back to work.” you repeated. “Apparently the quality of their photoshoots has tanked in my absence and he thinks I'm the only one who can fix it.”

“Absolutely not.” he angrily ground out. “You already told him that you wouldn't come back until the twins turned one.”

“Seung Hyun, relax.” you attempted to soothe him. “I never said that I would do it.”

“I’m not about to let him guilt trip you into returning to work before you're ready. I don't care how much of a friend he is to me.” he angrily snapped. “Why does he think you can make it better?”

“Because of my ability to understand what he wants from his concept ideas.” you patiently told him, knowing that he already knew the answer to his question. “And he needs me to organize the shoots.”

“But you were working almost every day before you got pregnant. And even three days a week until you went on leave.” he shook his head. “There's no way you can do that now with the twins to take care of.”

“I realize that.” you agreed, taking his hand in yours in an effort to calm him. “I told Dong Wook as much, and he said I only need to come into the office one day every other week. That's only twice a month. The rest I can just do through the computer. It might take me an hour every day to get that done.”

“You sound like you've already made up your mind.” he bit out, squeezing your hand.

“Seung Hyun, I didn’t tell him I would do it.” you sighed in exasperation, your own frustration rising in proportion to your husband’s. “Besides, you know I would never agree to anything as big as that without talking it over with you first.”

Seung Hyun drew a ragged breath, forcing himself to relax. “I know, I know…I’m sorry,” he murmured.

“I know, it’s alright,” you reassured him, leaning in to kiss his cheek and bring him back from the brink. “But, for what it's worth, Se7en did offer to let me bring the twins in to the office with me and he would hire a sitter for them while I work.”

“Really?” he replied, surprise in his voice. “Well... that changes things.”

“You are the most stubborn, most infuriating man I think I have ever met.” you scowled at him, pulling away and putting some distance between you again.

“Forgive me, gongju-nim. But I only want what's best for you and the twins.” he frowned, reaching over and pulling you to him once more.

Seung Hyun leaned in and softly pressed his lips to yours in a silent appeal for understanding, brushing them gently against yours and teasing you. You parted your lips, asking for more and happily accepting it as his tongue slowly slid inside of your mouth. You rapidly began to lose yourselves in a kiss that only grew more heated.

Finally breaking for air, you leveled him with a glare that held little anger to it now. “I hate how you always manage to do that.” you breathed heavily.

“Do what?” he smirked.

“Get your way when you kiss me like that.” you frowned.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, ________-ah.” he maintained.

“Of course you don’t.”

“Besides, I still need to get some revenge.” he huskily said as he began kissing behind your ear.

“Why?” you gasped as he raked his teeth over your earlobe. “What did I do?”

“You're the one who made the news with your 'Date'. Potentially cheating on me with your boss...” he reminded you with a playful tease. “Plus, we're still in the middle of a war, remember? Unless you give up?”

“I never agreed to surrender and you should’ve been keeping your focus on your own meeting instead of those gossip columns.” you scolded him.

“Well, if you weren’t so damn sexy.” he shot back. “No more meetings without me. The thought of what you might be getting up to is far too distracting.”

“We’ll just see about that, T.O.P.” you murmured, tilting your head and kissing him again.

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analogscum · 6 years

Text

PRIME EVIL (1988, d. Roberta Findlay)

Recently, my dear Scumbags, I watched a horror movie that I simply must tell you about. It deals with a woman who is haunted by dark secrets in her family history. It keeps her from enjoying everyday life, and she only begins to unravel more and more when a tragic death rocks her world. In her time of need, she brusquely pushes away those around her who would provide the help she really needs, and instead turns to spiritualism, only to realize once it’s far too late, and she’s burned all her bridges, that she has been an unwitting pawn in the machinations of a bloodthirsty demonic cult for her entire life, a sacrificial lamb destined for the abbatoir since birth. That movie, of course, is 1988’s Prime Evil. Wait, what movie did YOU think I was talking about?

Prime Evil was the final film to be directed by exploitation auteur Roberta Findlay. Her story is a fascinating one: alongside her husband Michael, she wrote and directed a number of sadomasochistic sexploitation films in the 1960s. Under the tutelage of George Weiss, who produced Ed Wood’s cross-dressing classic Glen or Glenda, the Findlays began spicing up their skin flicks with touches of seedy violence, essentially creating the “roughies” genre, alongside fellow New York City filmmakers Joe Sarno, Joseph P. Mawra, and Lou Campa. By the 1970s, the couple transitioned into making straight up slashers, including the super controversial 1976 feature Snuff, arguably an early example of found footage horror. The next year, Michael Findlay was tragically killed in a horrific helicopter crash on the roof of the Pan Am building. Roberta soldiered on, directing a number of genre classics on her own, including two in 1985 alone: Tenement and The Oracle. Prime Evil, unfortunately, is not a classic. In some regards, it is barely even a movie. Miss Findlay clearly had some lofty ambitions with this film, but attempted to execute them on a grindhouse, run and gun, down and dirty production. Because of this, Prime Evil is a fascinating failure, the type of film that works best when watched with like-minded friends, and preferably at some level of inebriation.

We open in a church in the 1300s, where some good ol’ terrible narration explains that the plague is in full effect, and the priests believe that it is God punishing those who aren’t holy enough, so a few priests were like, fuck this noise, we’re taking our talents to Hades. There’s a meeting with a bunch of priests, and the head priest is like, yo, Father Thomas, what’s with you, man? And Father Thomas is like, didn’t you hear the narration? I’m on Satan’s team now, God is wack. They converse about this, but Roberta Findlay must’ve not liked the dialogue, so the narrator comes back in to drown them out. Then the head priest is like, I’m gonna excommunicate you, Father Thomas, but Father Thomas is like, lol nope, and decapitates this head priest with a giant sword, and it’s awesome. Father Thomas is like, news flash bitches, I’m running this show, and I’m Satan Squad all day, so don’t get in my way. Some dork-ass priest is like oh noooooo! So Father Thomas awkwardly slashes him across the stomach with his sword, and the guy awkwardly falls down some stairs, and even the movie can’t stand to look at this, because it fades to black, mid-fall, like it’s embarrassed.

Cut to: present day Boston, though the film was obviously shot in New York City, to the point where nearly every synopsis I’ve read incorrectly says that the film takes place there. Anyway, an old priest dies while holding a weird amulet. A nun, Sister Angela, goes to the bishop and is like, hey bishop, I think Satanists killed that old priest, and I have a story about my mom being murdered by Satanists in Egypt or something, it’s kinda boring, Liam probably zoned out during this part. And shockingly enough, the bishop is like, yup, we know, it was totally a satanic cult, we just don’t know how to handle this pesky problem. So Sister Angela is like, hey, let me go undercover and infiltrate the cult and do nothing else until the final scene of the movie. The bishop is apprehensive for like five seconds, but then agrees, under the stipulation that Sister Angela must renounce her vows so she can do all sorts of evil cult stuff, which in this movie means smash a plaster crucifix with a hammer and burn her nun uniform. Umm, hail Satan?

Honestly, nothing about this cult makes much sense. They’re still lead by Father Thomas (whose last name, we find out, is Seton. GET IT?!?!) Members of the cult have to sacrifice a family member who is a virgin, and in exchange they get “13 years of immortality,” which is an oxymoron. That is not how immortality works! Why would you agree to some cockamamie plan where you have to renew your immortality clause or whatever every 13 years or start to age again? Is worshiping Satan like going to the DMV? Actually, that kinda makes sense.

So all of a sudden, this blonde lady is making out in a hallway with some dude who looks like Kevin Nealon. But wait, what? I thought Sister Angela was our main character? Is it now this lady? Anyway, she goes in and sees Alex, who is her job recruiter of some kind? Apparently blondie used to be a prostitute before she joined this like, temp agency? So Alex is like, hey, I got you a job interview at 2:30 tomorrow, it’s for a paralegal job…on Wall Street! To which blondie animatedly replies, “Wall Street?!?!” And I died a thousand tiny deaths.

Now we get to see blondie and Kevin Nealon hitchin’ a ride into the bone zone, Findlay style. But oh gosh, they’re interrupted by a homicidal maniac in a handyman’s uniform! Wait, what?! But fortunately, Kevin Nealon knows karate! WAIT, WHAT?!?! So he awkwardly does karate at this schlubby murderer for a minute, but then whoops, he still gets stabbed in the back, contorting his body like a Merce Cunningham dancer. Which is weird. So blondie runs down the stairs, before our killer catches up via a convenient jump cut, and knocks blondie out with some sort of tranquilizer. As he’s carrying her out of the building, some guy passes them and goes, “She have too much to drink?” To which our schlubby murderer replies, in a lifeless monotone, “Yes.” And the guy responds, “Have fun, man!” EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW EWW.

Since every cut to a new scene in this movie feels like violent whiplash, all of a sudden we’re at a gym, and Alex is working out with her friend. This friend is the most obnoxious character I’ve seen in a movie in awhile. She yells all of her lines in an exaggerated Valley Girl accent like a Siobhan Fallon SNL character for no reason, grunts loudly while using the machines, is constantly shoving chips and other junk food down her throat, and only wants to talk about sexytimes. She asks Alex if her boyfriend, Bill, is any good in bed, which really upsets Alex for some reason, and they get into a fight, which ends with the friend yelling the amazing line, “WHY DON’T YA WANNA GET POKED?!?!”

Suddenly, Alex and Bill are in the back of a horse-drawn carriage, riding through the part of Boston that looks just like Central Park. Without being prompted, Alex begins to go into excruciating detail as to why she don’t wanna get poked. Turns out, when she was 6 years old, her father sold her to a ring of child pornographers before mysteriously disappearing, yup, the movie really goes THERE. Clearly and understandably, she’s still deeply traumatized by all of this, which is why she and Bill still haven’t had sex despite the fact that they’re ENGAGED. But then, in basically the next scene, she’s hanging out with her rich lush of a mother, and she’s like, hey, come with me to Grandpa’s Christmas party, and the mom is rightfully like, you mean the father of the man who sold my daughter into sexual slavery as a child? Yeah, no thanks, I never wanna see anyone in that family ever again. GOOD IDEA, LUSH MOM! But Alex is like, oh c’mon, Grandpa is nice.

Plot twist: Grandpa ISN’T nice! In fact, Grandpa is a Satanist, and he’s going to sacrifice Alex at their next ceremony in order to renew that bullshit immortality contract. Apparently last time he offered up his son, Alex’s father, and that’s why he ain’t around no more. But, didn’t it have to be a virgin who was sacrificed? Umm, don’t worry about it. Father Thomas has the amazing line, “You’re being very flippant for a man about to sacrifice his granddaughter.” But Grandpa doesn’t just want to do that, he wants to overthrow Father Thomas and rule the world, or something, basically it’s all talk and nothing ever comes of it.

OK, this is taking forever, because something batshit insane happens every two minutes in this movie, so I’m gonna ramp it up a bit: Alex meets Father Thomas and begins to fall under his Satanic influence, thanks to his handsome eyes and Shatneresque line delivery. This rightfully upsets Bill, but Alex screams in his face every time he brings up how inappropriate this PRIEST acts around her. Dude, Bill, my guy, between the crazy family and the lustful priest and the no sex, why would you marry this woman?! The Satanists basically waterboard Alex’s lush mom with alcohol, which somehow Alex doesn’t hear despite being right next door to it happening. She moves in with Grandpa. Father Thomas makes out with her after the funeral, which, holy shit! Schlubby murderer abducts more ladies, including a hooker whom he basically reverse psychologies into roofying herself (in a scene set to Seinfeld style slap bass, no less!), a wise-cracking teen prostitute character they introduce solely to be abducted, and Alex’s slutty gym rat snack friend. Turns out schlubby murderer is doing all this because he wants to be a part of the Satanic cult, but Father Thomas is like, lol bro you may hang with us, but you’ll never be ONE of us, because you’re a creep and no one likes you. Somehow Bill starts to figure out that Father Thomas is behind all this murdering and Satanic chicanery, and goes to confront him, but whoops, schlubby murderer throws him off a roof. At least we get a pretty good bad dummy shot out of it!

At this point, you may be asking yourself, is there a bumbling police detective in this movie? Well of course there is! I think his name is Dan and he’s got a mustache! He’s investigating the disappearance of blondie from the beginning, and gets wrapped up in all this drama with Alex’s family because of it. Based on one phone conversation with Bill shortly before he’s murderized, he somehow puts together the entire satanic plot, including knowing that it’s going to happen during the winter solstice on December 21st, which, whatever, the movie has to end somehow, right? So Mustache Dan and his partner go to arrest Father Thomas, and during their confrontation, Mustache Dan utters what is actually the best line in the entire movie, a line that puts even “WHY DON’T YA WANNA GET POKED?!” to shame. Get ready for it...

“Cut the crap, fart breath!”

Slow clap for that. Slow clap. Brilliant.

Finally, the sacrificial ceremony can begin! Alex is all loopy under Father Thomas’s sexy spell, everyone has gathered in their finest Sunn O))) robes. Even Satan himself is there, and you guys, Satan in this movie is played by a tiny adorable puppet. It looks like if the baby from Eraserhead had bat wings and was made of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos. It is terrible and charming. Father Thomas begins the proceedings by introducing everyone to blondie, slutty gym rat snack friend, and wise-cracking teen prostitute. He’s like, these ladies are the brides of Satan now, so go ahead and show the audience dem titties! Naturally, they oblige. Suddenly, we see Sister Angela standing in the corner, and remember that she’s in the movie. Grandpa is ready to sacrifice Alex, and all the satanists begin to awkwardly grind on each other. Schlubby murderer wants in on some of them libations of the flesh, and grabs Sister Angela. Sister Angela is like nope, I didn’t sign up for THIS shit, and slashes his throat. Then she stabs Grandpa to death, before he can sacrifice Alex. Then, oh my gosh, she stabs the tiny adorable Satan puppet to death! RIP Satan puppet! All of the occultists begin to age rapidly and turn into corpses, like a less impressive version of the climax of The Devil’s Rain. Father Thomas runs up some stairs, yelling “You’ve won this time!” as if he’s a goddamn Scooby-Doo villain. All of the women are safe, and Sister Angela has some dumb line that includes the phrase “prime evil” but who cares.

The movie ends with a real estate agent lady showing a church to some guy, which is not how churches work I don’t think, and we’re supposed to not know who this guy is even though it’s glaringly obvious, and of course it’s Father Thomas, and he’s like, why don’t we check out the basement, mwahahahaha! And then the camera zooms in on him twice, just to really make sure we all get it. But wait, how can you restart the cult if Satan has been stabbed to death? How are you not a rotting pile of bones now that Satan has been stabbed to death? Get outta here with this ending!

Now, I wanna give this movie a fair shake. Yes, it is bonkers. Yes, the dialogue and the acting are both laughable. Yes, the camerawork and the editing are shoddy. Yes, the kills are mostly dull. But as I was making my way through the movie, trying desperately to make heads or tails of the madness unfolding onscreen, I suddenly began to think to myself…did Roberta Findlay secretly make a film about abuse?

Alex, the main character, is defined by the trauma of her childhood. It rules her everyday life, it keeps her from enjoying meaningful friendships and an intimate relationship with her boyfriend. However, despite all of this, she still lets herself be groomed for further abuse by Father Thomas, and remains oblivious to the fact that she is being groomed until it is nearly too late. That really struck me. Was this intentional on Roberta Findlay’s part? Was she trying to make a statement about how women can become complicit in the machinations of their abusers? Would I have thought of this if the film wasn’t directed by a woman? Am I giving Prime Evil too much credit, seeing a feminist message in a blood n’ boobs cheapie? Either way, there’s no denying that, whether it’s amassing an impressive oeuvre of sleazy underground classics, or infiltrating a weirdly bureaucratic Satanic cult, sisters are doing it for themselves.

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