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#so seeing her and knowing theres nothing i can do except sit and listen to her pain is so upsetting
lxmine · 1 year
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while you’re sleeping + wanderer, xiao, aether x gn!reader
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+. tooth rotting fluff, use of scara’s real name
+. summary ; them confessing to you while youre asleep… or so they thought.
+. A/N YALL SRRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN SOOO LOOONGG I HAD SO MANY PROJECTS ON HAND BUT ITS ALL OK NOW! anyways have this <33
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wanderer
he couldnt move… he couldnt move at all. he looked at you laying on his lap, sleeping peicefully. he breathed in and out just like what nahida told him to do whenever he’s mad, except he isnt. he doesnt know what he’s feeling but he felt as if he’s about to explode, his cheeks felt warm, how can a puppet feel such things for a mere mortal? if someone ever comes and see’s him, he’d be sure to get rid of them.
“you really are annoying.” he whispered rolling his eyes before looking back down at you. “i dont know what these feelings are but its so bothersome. you make my cheeks feel so warm and theres that fast beating inside my chest whenever you do stuff like this.” he babbled. he groaned, he felt like he’s going crazy, “i wanna push you off my lap right now, but i really rather kiss you right now.” he said only loud enough for him to hear looking elsewhere to contain his embarrassment. hearing a giggle. his eyes went wide.
“awww thats so adorable, wanderer.” you teased looking up at him, who so suddenly harshly pushed you off his lap to stand up and leave. “i hate you.” he grumbled, fast walking away from you. he should have know better! “kuni wait!” you laughed catching up to him and grabbing his wrist to pull him close to you and leaned in for a kiss. “you’re in love with me, and so am i. now, dont run away from me okay?” you smiled at him who is now a blushing mess, he felt so human.
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xiao
xiao thinks he really shouldn’t be there, sitting beside your sleeping form in a field of flowers. too calming for his liking, he wasn’t used to it at all. how did he even end up in here with you laying your head on his lap. he sighed, leaning both his arms beside him for support, admiring the place. if it aren’t for you bribing him both almond tofu and for bringing zhongli along with with you to convince him to come along with you.
“i appreciate that you want me to take a break even just for a while, but i just cant get used to this.” he began, still not looking at you. “i don’t understand what i was feeling, so i asked mr. zhongli about it and he told me i was in love or something. “ he breathed out closing his eyes. “ i know nothing of affection but i’m willing to learn it for you.”
“i want to teach you then.” his breath hitched upon hearing you, quickly opening his eyes to look at you. he hadn’t realized you’re awake, he guesses he’s just easy to let his guard down around you.
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aether
“waaahhhh paimon’s really full now!” paimon sighed leaning g against the chair, aether hummed in reply, admiring you who is sleeping beside him inside your home. you were just watching them eat away minutes ago and now youre asleep. “[name is really nice~ they’re so lovely! i love [name]! [name] cooks so much tasty food.” paimon smiled swinging her feet.
aether blushed, burying his face against his arms not daring to show his face. “i love [name] too.” he says aloud, catching paimon shocked. “[name] is so kind, [name] is so sweet,” he continued. “t-traveller-“ paimon tried to warm him that you’re awake and listening but he stayed in his position and continued. “[name] makes me feel loved, they make me feel warm and fuzzy. i love [name].”
“i love you too.” he sat up quickly hearing your voice so suddenly. now he’s a blushing mess, paimon giggled at the sight. “i… uh…” was all he could say while you and paimon laughed at his blushing face.
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AHHHHHH THIS WAS SO MUCH BETTER IN MY HEAD AS ALWAYS! AND MY CHARGER IS SO SHITTY I CANT EVEN CHARGE WITHOUT USING MY PHONE AND ITS KILLING ME IM NOT USED TO NOT USING MY PHNE WHILE ITS CHARGING. ANYWAY IM SO EXCITED FOR LANTERNRITE OMGGGGGGG WHO R U GUYS GONNA PULL FOR???
MASTERLIST
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calebwittebane · 10 months
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i wasnt gonna talk about it here and im still unsure about doing so, but. ive been having a hard time coping with gaias cancer diagnosis. its late stage and metastatic and theres nothing i can do except get her the best treatment possible and make however long she has left as good as possible. i dont know. its been so weird. cats are cats but to me she is family. shes the small person ive been responsible for these past 12 years. she was with me during some very significant moments of my life. getting to have her snuggle up to me and put her silly fuzzy paws on my face and purr loud as an engine, and petting her soft fur and talking to her and knowing that no matter how much i screw up in life i'm still her mama--all of that has been this, idk, rope tying all the fragments of my life together. i hope shes been happy with me. i can tell she can tell things are bad, and though shes a very strong kitty, i know shes been feeling worse. it makes her anxious to see me sad like this, so i try to keep it together and just do my thing. i dont know. theres vet visits ahead of us and shes gonna be soooo sulky... she hates being given meds too. but i let her sit on the window sill and look at birds and sniff the air basically all day. its a good thing its summertime. well she was in a bad mood this morning but she looks content right now. shes snoozing and listening to the crickets. she really likes that.
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soulofamy · 1 month
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Ship that you find cute but don't ship: ✌
Controversial Shipping Ask
ill give two, one for soulcalibur and another for mortal kombat
for soulcalibur, it would probably have to be hwang and mina. i dont think theres anything wrong with them and i dont really object to them being together. i honestly think sc6 gave them a really cute moment together after gaboks siege on the dojang. but idk i feel like they dont really give me a reason to care about them? they feel like a very bland version of kilik and xianghua. kilik and xianghua are easier to want to follow along with because there are hurdles you want to see them get past in order to find their happiness. the hurdles break your heart when you see that they are getting in the way. but that just makes the cute moments all the more endearing when we get them. sc3 arcade endings were all so sweet to watch and xianghuas sc4 ending legitimately made me tear up.
so then i turn to hwang and mina and wonder what it is that they have. like they arent BAD by any means. but like mina has a bit of stubbornness to overcome and her desire to be independent gets in the way of her settling down. but i feel like in the grand scheme of things there just really isnt anything for me to dissect or sink my teeth into when comparing them to the other ships i care about within soulcalibur. if someone who loves them wants to sit and tell me about why, i would happily listen and i am more than open to having my mind changed! but like as it stands, i am as indifferent as i can be on them as a couple
for mortal kombat, i already know that everyone and their mother is going to be at my throat for this but i dont really ship liu kang and kitana lol. i mean in the second timeline, especially in mk11 and in aftermath they were kinda cute. but then mk1 tore them apart and its kinda permanent, to the point where they dont even exist in the same universe anymore so i have to just wonder what the point is. i am not someone who likes angst for the sake of angst, if something angsty happens i want some sort of payout. i want development, i want the angst to be overcome, like just give me something. but mk1 does absolutely nothing except give us a two minute long moment of fanservice. no intro dialogues between titan kitana and liu kang, no reason to believe that they will get to be around each other more now, no exploration of liu kangs loneliness now that he is a god and is not in a place where he can have normal relationships anymore, like the ship just kinda sits there and doesnt do anything. they have their cute moments, yes, but its just really boring to watch
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nebulaleaf · 4 months
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I’m surprised u thought the dlc sucked ass— can u elaborate on why? It def has its flaws but I thought it was pretty fun so I’m interested to hear what you think
its 32 dollars and my total playtime was 3:59:00. my brother in christ that is INSANE. HALF OF THAT WAS CREDITS AND POST CREDITS SCENES ESSENTIALLY
listen the new characters were fun. thw new ost bopped. but this was a cardboard sandwich of content. i chuckled a few times but the mc picks vs. the new character npcs just... DO NOT MESH! ITS BORING! AKECHI HAS NOTHING TO SAY ON ANYTHING (except bickering with joker at times) AND KASUMI IS JUST... YIPEE WE'LL HELP! and OH NO. I ALSO MISS MY SISTER :((( SO WE'LL HELP! there is no sustinence here i genuinely feel bad for akechi fans and kasumi fans. imagine being starving and they serve you a single pea. like yes thank you that is food but also; 32 DOLLARS TO FIGHT A REHASH OF THE FINAL BOSS I ALREADY JUST FOUGHT, BUT WORSE. now. okay mechanically the boss was fun. i enjoyed it nothing to write home about but its no okumura and thats good. the music was super lacklustre and lame. AND MY GOD. I WAS SOOOO EXCITED TO SEE HER GOD DESIGN AND ITS JUST. SALMAEL BUT WORSE. AND I KNOW SHES SUPPOSED TO BE HIS FOLLOWER BUT UM. LMAO? THIS IS *EXTRA PAID CONTENT* YOU JUST REMOVED THE CLOTHING LAYER OF SALMAEL'S MODEL AND STUCK A BIRD ONTO IT. it just feels lazy this dlc is lazy. theres enjoyment to be had about it for sure; but after how good p5t was im just sitting there like. this should be free its a ripoff
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nonegenderleftpain · 2 years
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i hate hospitals i hate hospitals i hate hospitals i hate hospitals i hate hospitals i hate hos
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bangtangalicious · 3 years
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what would fmf!jk do if oc didn’t listen to jk and actually dated someone and ended up falling in love, how far would jk go to get her back?
so lets say you fall in love with taehyung bc he’s such a sweetheart in this. i hope you like this anon <3
tw: jealousy, possessive behavior, toxic fuckboy mentalities, fuckboy!jungkook, manipulation, implied smut, angst (sorry lmaoooo), heartbreak, selfpity, sabotage, poor taehyung rip, implied slut shaming (this part of the fuck me forever au)
weeks after hearing the news that you and taehyung were actually now dating, jungkook would find himself at the bar every night, drinking away the pain and throwing himself at others. he’d fuck two or three people a night, but his mind was always full of you. he was sick of you. no. he missed you.
he’d see you and taehyung around campus being all cute together. taehyung kissing your forehead, making you laugh, holding you in his arms the way jungkook used to
he’d sweat it off at the gym, pounding into the punching bag like there was no tomorrow. he couldn’t sit around and let you slip away from him. not any longer.
he’d hit you up, hellbent on doing whatever he needed to sabotage your relationship before he loses you for good. he’d text you asking to meet, showing up at your place when taehyungs not around. he’d want to try to drive a wedge between the two of you
he knew youd tell taehyung youd been spending time with him. he wanted you to. because he knew taehyung would advise you not to see him. to cut him out of your life.
and that was the key. jungkook would start putting the idea in your head that taehyung himself was overly possessive, not wanting you to spend time with your own best friend—how ridiculous ! 
jungkook knew all your deepest insecurities, and would exploit them to the fullest in order to to make you doubt taehyung’s commitment to you. 
he'd point out whenever other girls would talk to him. whenever taehyung would say he was too busy to see you. it would become the bane of his existence, making sure to catch taehyung slipping whenever he possibly could. he'd fill your head with wrong notions, reminding you all the reasons you felt you were undeserving of someone loving you.
then he'd recommend breaking up with him.
in the meantime he'd go around telling all your mutual friends that you still sleep with him even though you claim to be dating taehyung
taehyung may not believe it, but everyone else does. 
eventually they would start judging taehyung for being complacent or naive. saying that you’re taking advantage of him and getting away with cheating on him because you’re just that hot
despite how hard taehyung tries, it would eventually get to his head. he would blow up at you accidentally one day and you would start to think that maybe jungkook was right about taehyung being possessive. you weren't used to being in a relationship either. so you’d dump him then and there
jungkook would be overjoyed when you tell him, calling him in a mess of tears. he'd come over right away and take full advantage of your heartbreak & vulnerability. hold you tight. be the friend you knew and loved. the one you needed. 
sssh baby its okay. im here now aren’t i? everything will be okay. i got you.
you’d realize just how close he is, your lips would draw into him like a magnet. he’d make sure you kissed him first.
you’d want to give him everything, let him take complete control so that you could feel numb.
let me take away the pain baby. i can make it all go away. let me treat you right.
jungkook would then begin to fuck you sweetly. with care. getting into your emotional mind. filling you with love & adoration. making you feel wanted. making you feel beautiful. 
he has no idea what he’s missing out on. you’re a fucking goddess y/n. you’re the hottest girl in the entire world. you drive me crazy.
you realize that no matter how hard you tried to deny it you still had feelings for jungkook. you always would. 
this would overwhelm jungkook. he loves you too. but he’s afraid. afraid he’ll mess up and you’ll leave him. afraid that you’ll hurt him, get bored of him before he gets bored of you. he likes having to chase you. he likes the freedom of having you only when he’d like. he can’t be tied down, he can’t! its suffocating to think about. he doesn’t want what you and taehyung had.
he'd panic internally, but decide to entertain your feelings for the night if it would keep you this eager to please him and let him rail you repeatedly, all night long. however he wants.
god im fucking in love with you baby. i love you so much 
as he would push his cock deep inside you. he’d promise you love. friendship. the knowing comfort that you’d never ever be alone—you always had him. he was yours as long as you were his. 
you’re mine. all mine. don’t ever let anyone touch you again except me. im the only one. tell me im the only one. show me how much you need me.
he would fuck you over. and over. and over again. lips glued to one another. never parting as he pumped you full of his cum until you couldn’t even move. 
such a good fucking girl. so perfect for me. wanna fuck you just like this for the rest of my life
in the morning taehyung would show up begging for you to give him another chance. jungkook would answer the door in nothing but his boxers, telling taehyung everything he needed to know. 
once he would leave jungkook would grab your phone and block taehyungs number. he didn’t want to risk the two of you communicating and fixing your relationship.
he’d lie down, thinking about his actions as he watches you sleep. he couldn’t do it. he just couldn’t do it. he’d blink back tears of frustration, hating himself more for stealing something good from you—his best friend—for his own selfish needs. 
he wasn’t good enough for you. you deserved better. he recalled with a pang in his heart all the promises he made made while making love to you for so long last night. he was rotten, and he knew it. 
so when you you woke up. 
he was gone. 
a/n: basically he’d manage to get you back but then he would leave bc. he’s an asshole. IM SORRY HAAHAHA. theres a happy ending in the works ok dw. 
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erythrum · 3 years
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𝑭𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒆𝒓
𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘖𝘯𝘦
𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝘙𝘢𝘧𝘦 𝘊𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨,𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧,𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘯 𝘙𝘢𝘧𝘦,𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘦𝘹,𝘴𝘦𝘹𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘶𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘴,𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝙖/𝙣: 𝘪𝘮 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺
𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝘾𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 1.9𝘬 +
𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘤𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘨𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘺𝘢𝘳𝘥, 𝘺/𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘙𝘢𝘧𝘦
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The boneyard was a melting pot, pogues, tourons, and kooks unalike all gathering for one of the last kegger's of summer. This mash together of kids from all over Kildare and the mainland always ended in chaos, it was just a matter of time before shit went down tonight.
Rafe had his arm thrown around my shoulders as we walked down the path to the boneyard. I could faintly see Topper and Kelce downing the cups of pogue provided beer. Didn’t matter whether or not the kooks or pogues could get along, as long as it was on the cut and alcohol was provided, the teens could get along for a limited amount of time.
“Hey y/n! What are you doing here? I thought you were leaving for college this week?” It was Sarah who yelled out to me, running up to her brother and I in her floral printed dress. Rafe’s arm dropped to his side as she came with Topper not far behind.
“Oh I just couldn’t miss my last kegger before leaving, Duke can wait on me one more day.” The two of us embraced in one of those hugs that has you shifting your weight from side to side. I guess she didn’t realize I wouldn’t leave for college for another month, but I was sure she was already too drunk for me to explain it to her that she was not thinking of the right month.
As Sarah was hanging onto me probably a little too tight, Topper was giving Rafe one of those looks that said everything but also nothing at the same time. Like prior knowledge had to be known to understand the context. I of course did not, those two always had some stupid shit planned and I can almost guarantee it had to do with messing up the pogues’ little party.
The sun hung low on the horizon after I had finished my third cup, the colors illuminating the sky so brilliantly it felt like a fantasy. I stripped off my top and headed for the water, the pinks and purples of the sky reflected in its crashing waters. It was so cold, the temperature sent shivers up my body and a familiar rush in my energy. Almost waist deep now, I submerged my body completely under the water. It was always how I remembered it, calm and refreshing.
“C’mon Rafe! Don’t be a little bitch and get in there, I see the way you look at her,” Topper spewed, pushing his friend to have a little courage.
“Man what the fuck are you even talking about?” Deny everything Rafe thought.
“Oh come on dude, you’ve been making please love me eyes at her since the sixth grade, and please fuck me eyes at her since the tenth, when are you gonna do something about it for once? You’ve got a month to make a move, or regret it your entire life,” Topper continued his monologue as Rafe tuned him out, too distracted by the girl, his girl, staring out into the Atlantic like it was calling to her.
His heart was pounding as he made a B-line for the water, a light jog, but not so fast someone would think he’s crazy, or just madly in love. He swiftly pulled his polo over and off his head before plunging into the chilly water. Topper clearly knew whatever he'd said had worked.
I heard him before I saw him, Rafe approached and submerged himself just as I had a few minutes before.
“If we get hypothermia I'm sending you my hospital bills.” He laughed, wading around in the shallow water.
“Oh shock! Rafe Cameron threatening his medical bill payments? I never could’ve guessed!” We enjoyed our few minutes of peace before talking again.
“But it’s basically impossible anyways, you get use to it after awhile, maybe it’ll calm your hot-headed ass down,” I giggled and prepared for what always came next. Rafe pickup me up around my waist, lifting me over his shoulder before attempting to sprint as fast as he could deeper into the water. His hands had been wrapped around the back of my knees for a few moments until he threw himself and I down into the deeper water, both of us completely submerged beneath the surface.
The sun was dipping below the horizon now, and the deep blue of the sky was beginning to envelop the boneyard. We had come up for air, and I began splashing him with the water around us, payback for his antics. Theres no way in hell I’d be able to throw him down into the water too, this was the best I could come up with. The two of us were laughing before Rafe grabbed my arms and twisted me around so my back was flesh against his front. I gave up on trying to fight him off. Instead I just rested against him in an attempt to catch my breath.
“Hey Rafe, can we talk about something?” Oh fuck she knows, he thought. This was gonna be it, it’s going to fuck up his entire plan.
“Yeah, uh sure, like here?” He questioned.
“Maybe not here, I think we’ve got as audience,” he knew she was referring to Topper and Kelce, they were watching from the beach.
"The truck then?" I nodded my head, not at all prepared for the favor I needed to ask of him.
The sand stuck to my feet as we headed back to where his truck was, the chilly air wrapping around my body. Rafe opened the backseat door and pulled out a towel for me, always prepared. He pulled the passenger side door and I slid into the seat, the heat of his car pumping through the interior. My heart was pounding, but I wasn’t sure if his was too. We made it about halfway to tannyhill before speaking.
“Soooo,” he said.
“You’re going to think I’m absolutely crazy, Rafe," I laughed in an attempt to hide my nervousness.
"First of all, you're already crazy, and second of all, I'm pretty sure I know exactly what you're going to say," his hands were clenching the steering wheel harder now.
""Oh really? You already knew that I was going to ask you to take my virginity?" I don't know why, but I just blurted it out.
His car came to a screeching halt on the side of the road, lunging me forward as he stared in disbelief at the road infront of him.
"Im sorry, what did you just say?"
"That I want you to take my virginity? V-card? Cherry? Damn Rafe how else am I supposed to say it?"
"And," there was a pause in his voice like he didn't believe me, "your being serious, correct?"
“Correct.”
“And, come again? I need to hear that one more time.”
“Jesus fuck Rafe, I’m being dead serious, I want you to take my virginity, what about that is so hard to explain?” It came out as more of a yell than a scream, he took a long sigh and ran his fingers through his hair. He was thinking long and hard, I knew because he always had something to say, and now he wasn’t saying anything at all. It felt like hours had past before he spoke again.
“Why?”
It was my turn for a long sigh.
“Well, I guess I’ve been thinking about it for awhile, and I want to do it, but whenever I think about it in my head the only person I can see doing it with is you. You’re the only person I trust enough with my own body, I mean shit,” I had to think for a long time before admitting what came next.
“Whenever someone, you know like Scarlet or whoever, asks about who I’m interested in or whatever it may be, not a single person ever comes to mind except you, it’s like all I see when I look at you is you, everything else is like blurred around you and whenever I think about who the love of my life will be, I always think of you, not some mystery guy that I haven’t met yet.” I didn’t plan for this to be a full confession on how I feel about him, but here I am spilling everything I’ve been holding in my heart for the last three years.
“And I know that sounds fucking stupid I know, I mean we’re still teenagers for crying out loud, but when I’m with you it always feels like I’m home.” I was nearly crying at this point, struggling to get the words out of my chest that had been waiting for so long. He was listening, deadly quiet, and I had no idea what he was thinking for once in my life.
“You know what? Just forget about it, can you take me home please?” I was definitely crying now, it felt like I’d ripped my own heart to shreds. Theres no way he could ever feel the same way about me, he protected me like I was his own blood, not like he was in love with me. My face was nestled into the sleeve of my hoodie as the tears came out. His hands had moved back to the steering wheel now, gripping onto it so tight I thought it might break. The muscles in his forearms almost looked like they were twitching, but he still had the car in park.
He wanted to just grab her and kiss her right now, the girl he'd been in love with since the sixth grade sitting in his passenger seat, her seat, confessing her feelings to him. Rafe knew it was alot for her to ask, but it meant even more to him everything that she had said after her original question. And there was no way in hell he was going to let her get away again.
Rafe reached his hand over to hold onto her tear stained cheek.
"y/n," The bother of them were breathing heavily.
"I'm in love with you," it slipped from my mouth and he leaned in to kiss me. It felt like I had a wave of electricity coursing through my body. His hand grasping onto my face as he leaned over the center console. My hand reaching for his chest, his lips on mine as we intertwined with one another. It felt like everything in my life was complete, and the tension has been released. His fingers tangled in my hair.
It was over before I realized it, and Rafe was driving me home. My breathing hadn't normalized in any way, it was like I needed to throw up my heart to get the knot out. I couldn't stop thinking about the way his had felt on me, the way his lips felt on mine, the way it felt for once in my life like I was loved.
"i'll think about it," his voice cracked.
I leapt out of his car as fast as I could with tears streaming down my face. Did he feel the same? Did he not? My brain was spinning so fast I barely made it inside my bedroom door before collapsing. I wrapped myself up in the thick comforter, a heart full of ache and a body exhauster with sleep.
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rommahh · 3 years
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Enough For You
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Word Count: 4.8k
{This is my first peter fic and theres more to come. I may make a part two of this- it depends though. This work is a complete work of fiction and doesnt follow the mcus storyline of peter parker at all. Just the characters. Anyways enjoy. Much love, R.}
Peter, as smart as he can be, was a complete and utter idiot. He could read an entire textbook on quantum physics, take a test on said textbook, and ace it like it was nothing. That's how intelligent he was. But when it came to the obvious things that didn't take place in the academic world- he was an oblivious idiot.
Y/N has had a crush on Peter since they were in elementary school. Everyone in Peter and Y/N’s inner circle saw how deep in love Y/N was with Peter- except for Peter. Y/N has spent years trying to tell him how she feels but he always just interprets it as Y/N telling him how much she loves their friendship- like the idiot he is.
As senior prom slowly approached Y/N waited for the moment where Peter would ask her to the dance. They both were not dance people but senior prom was so different. Y/N just wanted to spend the night with her closest friends before they all went their separate ways for college. Normally Y/N and Peter went to every dance together, but as prom got closer, Y/N started to worry that he wouldn't even ask her. And unfortunately, she was right to think that.
Ned, Peter, MJ, and Y/N all sat at a round table on their school's campus during their lunch period talking and eating. The conversation of prom came up making Y/N’s ears perk up hoping to hear the words she's been waiting for from Peter.
“So Peter, what are your prom plans?” MJ asked, chewing on some of Y/N’s carrots from her lunch. Y/N looked at Peter waiting for his answer. He blushed, rubbing the back of his neck to ease his nerves.
“I'm actually going to prom with Liz. I asked her yesterday after school and she said yes.” He smiled happily of the thought of him and Liz dancing at prom. Y/N on the other hand felt her heart clench uncomfortably. MJ looked just as shocked as Y/N hearing Peter's words. Ned looked up from his comic book as an uncomfortable silence filled the table.
Quickly, Y/N packed her lunch back into her lunch bag and slung her bookbag haphazardly over her shoulder. Her face was scrunched up as she tried to contain her tears. “Sorry guys, I completely forgot that I have to help Mrs. Anderson with some...thing.”
Rushing away, the group was left to watch Y/N’s figure scurry away from the table. Tom looked at her in confusion before looking at his other best friends trying to figure out what had just happened.
“What just happened? Is she Ok?” He asked getting his stuff ready so he could go and follow the girl. MJ put a hand on his arm to stop him from packing up.
“I think you should just let her be alone for a minute… So you and Liz huh?”
“I- yeah I've had a crush on her for years now. I thought I told you guys this.” Peter’s hands fiddled with the book in front of him. Ned shared a look with MJ making Peter look at them confused again. “Guys, what aren't you telling me? What's going on?”
“Sorry dude, it's not our place to say. You should probably talk to her after school.” Ned replied, patting Peter on the back trying to comfort him. The bell interrupted any further conversation from happening. The trio went their separate ways to class after saying an awkward goodbye.
Peter spent the whole day with his mind clouded with thoughts. He racked his brain for any possible reason as to why Y/N were so upset.
After school, Peter showed up to a Y/N’s house hoping to talk to the girl and figure out why his best friend was so upset. Y/N’s mom gave Peter a small smile when he approached the house, nodding her head to where the backyard was located to say where Y/N was at.
Y/N sat on a quilt made by her grandmother on the soft gras of her backyard. A large tree covered her from the sun that was slowly beginning its descent into the night. She looked up from the book she was reading hearing the sound of footsteps coming towards her. Peter stood there, backpack on one shoulder, hands in both sweater pockets just waiting.
“Hey.” Peter said, setting his backpack down before sitting across from the girl on the soft quilt.
“Hi Peter.” She quietly replied, keeping her head low so she couldn't meet his eyes.
“Can you tell me what happened today? You seemed upset. Did something happen in class?” He asked, his hand reaching out to tilt her face to look at him. She looked at his face, seeing his furrowed eyebrows and watching as his eyes searched her face for any clue as to what was wrong.
“You're taking Liz to prom.” She finally spoke after a moment of silence.
“I'm taking Liz to prom.” He confirmed still sitting there in confusion.
“I wanted you to ask me to prom.”
“Oh.” Y/N stopped looking at Peter, her hands playing with the frayed edges of her ripped jeans.
“Oh? You always ask me to school dances and I just thought…”
“Thought what? Y/N I dont get what you're saying. We did go to past dances together but this is prom you know. I really like Liz so I asked her.” He said still not putting two and two together to understand the issue.
“To be the smartest boy in our school, you are the biggest idiot ever.” Peter scoffed, offended by her comment. “Peter, I love you.”
“What?” Peter was shocked by her statement.
“I've liked you since the 4th grade and I guess I assumed you had started to like me too. I thought you were going to ask me to prom because you- you liked me too?” She looked at him again, face flushed and shoulders tense with anxiety.
“Y/N...I'm sorry but I- I dont like you like that. I didn't know that you did like me like that.” He watched as her shoulder dropped in defeat. Tears pooled in her eyes spilling onto her cheeks. She quickly wiped her face off with her hands. “Please don't cry, i'm so sorry. I still want to be friends though.”
She chuckled at his words. “I don't think we can be friends, Peter. I think it would be best for myself if we weren't friends.”
Her words cut like knives through his heart. He stood up abruptly as anger flooded through his body.
“So we can't be friends now? We've been friends since kindergarten. You are my best friend Y/N and you're going to throw it away over this?” His voice rose as he spoke. Y/N stood as well, anger taking over her as she listened to Peter raise his voice at her.
“Do you know what it feels like to watch someone you love not love you back?” She yelled at him, Peter’s eyes widened in shock having never heard his best friend speak like this before. “Do you know what it's like to watch the person you love have crushes on everybody but you? Do you know what it's like to not be enough? What is it about Liz that I don't have? You don't even know her!”
“You're mad at me for not liking you back? I can't control my feelings Y/N and I'm sorry for that but I don't want to lose our friendship. Please don't do this.” He held her face in his hands brushing the stray tears from her face. She shook her head free, backing away from him. Her hands clutched her arms, folding on top of her chest.
“I'm sorry Peter that I couldn't be good enough for you.” She gave him a small heartbroken smile before grabbing the book she was reading and went inside of her house. Peter watched as his best friend walked away from him for the second time that day. His chest felt tight, hands shaking as he thought about the ending of friendship he held dear to his heart.
Peter dreaded going to school. He spent the whole night being forced awake by panic attacks and non-stop crying. He had never felt a heartbreak like this. He's heard people say that friendship breakups are harder than relationship breakups and Peter can attest to that. Granted he's never been in a relationship, but he's going through a heartbreak he's never felt before.
He got ready for school slowly, relishing in the comfort of his room before exiting out into the living room of the apartment. He gathered his backpack that had been thrown carelessly in the living room out of anger as Aunt May watched him from the hallway before her bedroom. She decided against asking him what was wrong because she didn't want him to become even more upset on his way to school. Her heart aches as she watches her boy frown and wander around with sadness looming on his face.
At school, Ned and Mj waited for Peter at his locker like the group normally does. This time, Y/N was nowhere to be seen. Peter walked up to his locker, unlocking it and grabbing his things from inside of it for class.
“Did you guys know she liked me?” Peter asked after standing in silence with the group for a few moments. They looked at Peter in pity before nodding yes. Peter shook his head, upset with himself for never noticing the obvious feelings coming from his best friend.
The group walked to their first period class, Ned and Mj making small talk whereas Peter walking listening in on the conversation. Sitting in their normal seats, they waited for the first bell to ring that determined when the first period would begin.
The door of the classroom opened showing Y/N with arms filled with her textbooks and backpack slipping off of her arms. MJ thought Peter looked bad but Y/N probably looked worse. Her eyes were puffy carrying bags of sleeplessness and her overall appearance looked tired. The Y/N the group knew would come to school always dressed for success wearing the cutest outfits and makeup done to perfection. She wasn't over the top with it but she always looked so well put together. Today, she was wearing leggings and a ratty hoodie. Her hair didn't look like it normally did, her face was bare of makeup.
She moved slowly looking for an open table in the classroom. She saw one in the back of the room near the window and walked over to claim it as her own. Her friend group watched in shock as she walked past them and towards the empty table. Peter’s chest hurt so bad watching her walk past them. Mj and Ned were upset too but they had spoken to her before school and understood her want for space.
“She doesn't have to sit all the way over there.” Peter whispered still staring at Y/N as she settled into her seat in the back of the room.
“It's ok, she just wants space and that's ok.” Mj reassured him, rubbing his shoulder as he laid his head down on the table. He didn't know how he would cope without his best friend or lack thereof.
Lunchtime came sound and normally the friend group would sit outside together if the weather was nice. They've always done this since freshman year. They would sit at the wood tables and share their lunch with each other. Y/N would normally share her fruits and vegetables knowing that her friends packed unhealthy junk food.
Today was different though. Mj, Peter, and Ned sat at the table without her. Her spot at the table is empty leaving an uncomfortable gap at the round table. Y/N found herself seated inside of the library by the window that looked out on the wooden tables she would normally sit at.
Y/N sat in the quiet library crying her eyes out as she watched her friends comfort Peter. She was hurting so bad knowing that she ruined her friendship. She wishes that she never said anything. That she just let Peter be happy with his newfound relationship with Liz. She wanted to be happy for him but she had some resentment towards him. She understood he couldn't control his feelings but she hurt knowing that he never in the years they've known each other he's never looked at her more than a friend.
She wiped her tears from her face, pulling her neatly packed lunch box out of her backpack. She stared down at her lunch, sad that she had no one to share with anymore.
“Hey, do you mind if I sit here?” A voice said from above Y/N. Looking up she saw Bryant, another senior in her class, standing with his lunch.
“Oh- yeah, sure, of course.” Y/N stuttered making room at the table for his things. The table was large enough for the two of them so there was no real reason for her to say that he couldn't sit with her. Bryant was the captain of the baseball team at their highschool. He wasn't like the cliche popular kids at school who stayed within their cliques but he was very sweet and attentive to anyone he crossed paths with.
“Thank you! I saw you sitting by yourself and it kinda looked like you needed a friend.” He commented setting his salad from the cafeteria down along with his backpack that seemed too empty for a highschool seniors backpack. “So, how's today going for you?”
Y/N was taken aback by the boy's boldness. This was her first time ever talking to him and he wants to know about her day? She was baffled.
“I-It's been slow I guess. I'm ready to go home honestly.” He nodded, chewing on his salad.
“I feel that. I wish I could go home after school. I've got prom preparation after school, so annoying.” He rolled his eyes at the thought. “I don't know if you know but my name is Bryant, it's real nice to meet you.”
Sticking his hand out to shake, Y/N grasped it hesitantly.
“I'm Y/N, I think we had english together last year.”
“Yeah we did didn't we. I hated that class, you were awesome in it though.” She blushed at the compliment. “But yeah, I know who you are. You're apart of Peter’s little group.”
“Oh yeah, I was.” She shrugged emotions overwhelming her again.
“Was? You obviously don't have to tell me, but I hope you're ok.” Bryant smiled at Y/N and Y/N was blown away by his kindness.
“Peter and I aren't friends anymore. He's going to prom with Liz and I just thought that maybe he would have asked me.” Bryant felt bad for Y/N. He could see how hurt she was despite her wearing a smile on her face. Y/N wasn't a stranger in this school. She played a large role in academics and actively participated in multiple clubs. The Y/N Bryant saw before wasn't present today and it was sad.
“I know we've just met but I don't have a date to prom either...if you would like to go with me. I wanted to go with Jordan but it turns out he is not actually into very beautiful and athletic boys.” Y/N laughed along with Bryant.
“I would love to go to prom with you as long as we can coordinate outfits.” Bryant laughed some more agreeing with her. Y/N looked down at the lunch before sliding over a few snacks toward Bryant. Y/N still felt the sadness of letting go of her best friend lingering with her but it felt nice to meet someone new. Not someone to replace her Peter but someone to remind her that life goes on and that she'd be ok in the long run.
Weeks have passed since Peter and Y/N’s fallout and it was a weird few weeks. School was coming to an end, cap and gowns were slowly being handed out for graduation and prom posters were posted everywhere.
Y/N was still avoiding Peter at all costs but she apologized to Ned and Mj for ignoring their feelings. She didn't want them to feel like they had to be in the middle of this mess. She didn't want them to feel like she also ditched them too. They understood her, they knew how hard it was for her to remove herself from their friend group for the sake of her mental health.
Y/N and Bryant continued to grow closer. He was a good distraction from her current problems. She also learned that he was bisexual and that Jordan was also on the baseball team who was too scared to come out and go to prom with Bryant. Bryant was someone Y/N didn't expect to befriend her. His kindness made her feel so much better after what had happened.
Peter struggled badly. He had been so happy to finally get the girl he had been pining after for years but seeing Y/N cry because of him hurt so much. It made him rethink his whole friendship with her. Did he really only think of her as a friend?
Peter watched everyday as Y/N grew closer to Bryant, a warm feeling entered his belly every time he saw the two together. It wasn't a pleasant warm feeling, it was a feeling that made him overthink everything he did. It was a feeling that made his face scrunch up and his head fill with sickness. His thoughts became muddled, words not making sense as he watched the two. He was jealous. Did he recognize it as jealousy, no, because Peter was an idiot.
Prom season was hectic and fun all at the same time. People were hardcore prepping for the dance. Money was being saved for the before dance dinner and the stretch limo that would provide a chariot to the dance.
The mall was beyond crowded, Bryant led the way with Y/N pushing through crowds of people to reach the small dress shop they had been dying to go to all day. The small dress shop was locally owned by a hispanic couple who hand made the dresses in the shop. The dresses they had were beautiful, all arraying from different colors, sizes, and silhouettes. Y/N tried on almost every dress in the store that was in her size.
“This is useless, these dresses are gorgeous but I feel like I look so stupid.” Y/N huffed sitting next to Bryant on the velvet loveseat that sat in front of the dressing room. Y/N was near tears out of pure frustration.
“Stop it, I thought you looked amazing in every single one of those dresses. I think you're just too into your own head. What's up girl?” He put an arm around her shoulders laying his head on top of hers.
“I just want to look good. Good like Liz…” She whispered the last part out of embarrassment. Bryant scoffed.
“You're joking right? You two are incomparable people. She's pretty in her own ways just as you are. Are you comparing yourself to her because of Peter?” Bryant exclaimed loudly, catching the attention of the woman who owns the shop.
“Peter likes Liz.” Was all that Y/N could muster, pouting at her own words.
“Here mija.” The woman who owned the shop came walking over to Y/N with a beautiful pink dress in her hands. “I made this a week ago but havent even put it on the floor yet.”
Y/N shook her head furiously, “No I couldn't.”
“No, please try it on and if you like it, it's yours.” The woman insisted on a bright smile playing on her face.
“Its-Its mine?”
“Yes honey, you obviously need this dress more than I do. You need a dress that will make you feel beautiful and I think this will do.”
Y/N tried on the dress watching it flow down to the floor. It was a pretty pink color with flowers at the top. Buttons adorned the middle of the dress cinching the waist and the bottom of the dress flowed to the floor in bunches.
Stepping out of the dressing room, dressed clad on her body, Bryants mouth dropped in shock at the sight of her.
“Holy….” He was at a loss for words. Y/N blushed, turning to look at herself in the mirror, her own mouth dropping in shock.
“...Shit” She finished.
“You look amazing mija. It's all yours, please, you have to wear that to your dance.” The woman begged Y/N. Y/N nodded, smiling at herself in the mirror. It had been weeks since she felt like her normal self. She had spent so many days pondering about why Peter liked Liz more than her. Why Liz got Peter versus Y/N getting peter. But now it wasn't about Peter.
The woman walked with Y/N up to the front of the store, carefully wrapping the dress in a delicate box.
“No boy should ever determine his worth.” The woman said, handing the box over. “You are beautiful and I'm sure Liz is too but you, you are a gorgeous young woman who will encounter many men or women or people in general who will want to be in your life simply because you are you.”
Y/N thought about the shop owner's words as both Bryant and her maneuvered through the mall's crowds. Y/N grasped the corner of Bryants elbow as he carried their shopping bags. He made small jokes making Y/N laugh. He kissed her on the cheek endearingly as she laughed some more.
Unknown to Y/N, Peter stood a few feet away from the couple as they walked by holding onto each other looking like...a couple. That warm feeling reentered Peter's belly, sickness looming over his head making him feel lightheaded. Peter watched the couple walk away with sadness filling his heart. He missed being Y/N’s best friend. He missed their walks through the mall where he would buy her all the pretzels she wanted while holding her bags of useless junk she spent hundreds on. He missed her.
Prom night came quickly after finals finished on campus. Y/N put on her dress and had her hair and makeup done by her mom. Standing in front of her mirror she made sure she was ready to go. Her mother called her to the front door signalling Bryant was there to pick her up.
Bryant showered Y/N in compliments, getting his matching pink tie tied by Y/N’s dad. They both exchanged corsages and boutineers that were adorned by pretty white flowers. They took pictures in the backyard by Y/N’s tree posing in silly poses and in your typical prom poses.
Peter stood outside of Liz’s house filled with dread. He realized that this was not the place that he wanted to be. He wanted to be at Y/N’s house taking pictures, eating her parents food, and laughing about the stupid things they normally joke about. He wanted to watch as Y/N showed off her dress to him. He wanted to be the one to bring her a bouquet of flowers that she would dry up in her journal for safe keeping. But instead he was here, in front of Liz’s mansion, hurting.
The dance was at full blast when Y/N and Bryant arrived- late because Bryant believed being fashionably late was the best type of late. They walked around the venue hand in hand as Bryant showed off all of the things he contributed to the dance. Bryant left Y/N in the flower photo room having been called away to help fix something for the dance. Y/N admired the walls covered in small and large flowers.
“Woah.” Someone gasped from behind Y/N. Turning around she came face to face to a red faced peter. “You look…ethereal, is that even the right word?”
Peter couldn't stop staring at how beautiful Y/N looked. Her dress made her stand out from the rest. Butterflies erupted in his stomach replacing the warm feeling of jealousy he had been previously feeling.
“Oh, hi Peter.” Y/N was filled with nerves as he slowly walked towards her. “How are you?”
“I don't feel too good honestly. I messed up a really good thing I think and I want to fix it. I never realized how much you meant to my life until I lost you. I know that's cheesy but it's true.” He quietly uttered, staring into her eyes. “I don't want us to stop being friends and I think I do like you.”
“You think?” She questioned looking at him hopefully.
“I- yeah I think.”
He thinks. He doesn't know if he likes her but he thinks he does. Y/N shook her head disappointed.
“Peter, I've spent the last three weeks wondering why I wasn't good enough for you to like me. I only just realized that I was good enough maybe not for you but for other people. Since we were kids I always did things in hopes of catching your attention. I joined the debate team because you did. I joined the academic team because you became the captain. I even tried to apply to be an intern at stark industries so I could work with you without even realizing that stark industries didn't have internships. And that spiderman started appearing a lot more after said internship appeared.” She had a knowing smile on her face.
“Oh so you know.” He looked down at the ground embarrassed to be exposed.
“Peter, I know so much about you. I know you better than Mj and Ned that's the whole reason why we are best friends. I know how you like your sandwiches- breakfast and lunch. I know how you organize your school work. I know that you like to specifically request time in the lab in the morning because all of the equipment is freshly washed and you like to first pick at the goggles and coats. Peter, I know you don't like me. You feel bad and miss me but you don't like me.” She walked to him, placing her hands on his cheeks. He melted into her hands.
“But I think I do Y/N.”
“Ok so say you think you like me, I would prefer to have you when you know you like me not when you have only developed small feelings after not having me for a few weeks. Peter, I'm in love with you. I'm in a lot deeper than a few small feelings. I don't want to make you be in a relationship when we are in two very different places.” She sniffled a little one hand coming to stop the tears from ruining her makeup.
“I want nothing more than to be your best friend again but I can't.” He couldn't stop his tears from falling at those words. “I can't go back to being the girl who did nothing for herself and everything for the boy she loves. I need more for myself. I'm going to college and I don't even know how to just be me without you and I need to learn how.”
He absorbed her words, crying free flowing tears.
“I want you to be happy Y/N.” He nodded, she swiped her thumbs under his eyes. She smiled sweetly at him. Placing a sweet kiss on his lips, Y/N  gave him one last smile before walking away from him.
Y/N walked away with her heart feeling light. She felt like a burden had been lifted off of her shoulders. Her intent wasn't to hurt Peter but she needed to say what had been in her mind for weeks. She knew he would eventually move on from his slight crush on her and so would she. She would move on eventually, it would be a slow and hard process but it would happen. And she would never fully get over him. She's been in love with him since they were kids- it's all she's ever known. But for right now she was focusing on loving herself and growing into the person she was meant to be- without Peter.
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ickymichi · 3 years
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𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀 𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐈 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒:
𝐩𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
<3 warning: none really! just slight mentions of nsfw but nothing brutal, swearing, v slight angst, mentions of insecurity.
<3 things to know!: set in the timeskip, unless i’m like ‘this was back in high school’. (implied female) reader and issei are in an established relationship.
<3 summary!: headcannons i have about issei and his appearance/body. :)
<3 a/n: see i genuinely had no idea what to call this. like it’s headcannons that i have about issei’s appearance/body?. and also to make some of the things named more normalised and to make ppl see how attractive they make ppl. reblogs are greatly appreciated <3
all contents belongs to hotboyissei 2021. please do not repost or modify on this or any other platform.
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𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐊𝐋𝐄𝐒: listen to this okay. issei with freckles on his shoulders. beautiful i know. but just imagine it. those nice broad shoulders with thousands of freckles scattered across them from years of tanning and getting sunburned on the beach while on holidays or just from the numerous summers he spent in your backyard getting a tan. just running your hands across them seeing how some of them connected to form a bigger one. he always tells you it tickles. but never says stop. also in summer he gets them on his face from the sun.
𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐒: he definitely had them on like the part of his back where his arm meets his shoulders, on the under side of his biceps and definitely got some on his ass cause boy got cake. but he’s insecure about them and used to hate wearing tank tops cause you could see them. but you told him how much you love them and how cool they look. now mf thinks he’s hot shit (as he should) and walks around your house in them or just shirtless. if you have some to he would literally always be telling you how attractive it is. literally constantly.
𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑: he definitely is on the hairier side. like he got hairy ass legs let me tell you, but it thins out when it gets to his thighs a bit. definitely waxes or shaves his ass idc idc, was scared from this one time he was watching porn and it just got a shot of the guys hairy ass and he was disgusted. but also he got like, not a lot to where he has to constantly wax it, but a nice amount of chest hair, like it’s only on his pecs not on his stomach you know?. side story!: it was like, two months after you started dating and you were having a movie night at his and you were staying over. makki convinced, i mean convinced him you were going to have sex for the first time. so issei being afraid you’d think his chest hair is unattractive he booked a chest wax and made makki come with him. he recorded the whole thing and showed you two years later, big bad matsukawa issei himself, screaming from pain and nearly breaking makki’s hand with the grip he had on it. end of side story :). his happy trail? pheww that shit idky it’s just attractive to me for some reason. also has a bit of stubble but he shaves it cause of one time in third year he was just really lazy that week and didn’t shave and when the four of them went to go to the cinema on saturday oikawa said: “who’s uncles coming our way?”. from then on he never goes out with to them without shaving beforehand. if you tell him you find it attractive he’d grow it out a small bit just to see your reaction. but if you said you don’t like it he’d do it anyway to annoy you.
𝐀𝐂𝐍𝐄: high school issei definitely had acne. not like major but had some on his cheeks and his back. he hated it sm cause all his friends never had a problem with it. until you told him it doesn’t matter if he has it for not he’s still seggsy as fuck. now timeskip issei? not as much. he made sure to start taking care of his skin halfway through high school. that is until masks became a thing, poor guy has a love hate relationship with them now.
𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆: listen, issei eats. mf has the biggest appetite you’ve ever seen. ceo of “you eating that?”. every time you see him on the couch he either has a bag of crisps, chocolate, popcorn, leftovers from last night or a takeout he ordered in his lap. man just loves food (i relate ‘sei dw). but all that eating makes boy bloat like crazy. like, he has a fast metabolism so mf never gains weight that much🙄. but he could literally eat half a sharing bar of chocolate and suddenly he’s eight weeks pregnant. also, he didn’t know what bloating was until you finished a movie night and mf took half the popcorn, had his own bag of jellies and three of the small multipack chocolate bars. so when he undressed for his shower and caught a glimpse of his stomach that normally only has a bit of pudge, pushed out to where it looks like he gained weight over night he has a stroke. this how shiz went down:
“(Y/N)!!” you literally sprinted to the bathroom thinking he fell or sum. “what issei? what happened?!”. “have i, have i always been this big?” “what? you look like you always do”. the distressed noise he let out along with him fake stumbling and grabbing the counter had you confused. “i look pregnant! what do you mean i always look like this? we’re getting a treadmill or at home gym or whatever i need to get back to how i was. good lord i really let myself go.” he ran a hand across his face while rubbing his stomach and looking in the mirror. then it hit you. “oh my god you fucking idiot, you do realise how much shit you are right? your just bloated.” “bloated? the fuck is that?”. you then spent the next fifteen minutes sitting on the toilet seat explaining what bloating was while he showered.
𝐂𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐇: i just know baby don’t got teeth that look like a fresh set of veneers. and it’s not like they crazy crooked, just slightly that you barley notice unless you’re up close and stare at his mouth. but because he’s always looking at himself it’s the first thing he sees. this leads to him covering his mouth whenever he laughs and only slightly smirking or lifting his mouth to a small closed lip smile when he’s told to smile. everytime he has to take a picture with his family one of his auntie who’s taking it shouts: “smile issei!” every time. and he always says: “i am though”which leads to his getting pinched in the side by his mother and her telling him: “fucking smile properly before i whoop your ass” through gritted teeth while she smiles brightly herself. he grew to not care as much when, you again, told him you love his smile when he threw his head back instead of covering his mouth when you told him a funny story.
𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐒/𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐒: heavenly i know, but bby doesn’t completely agree. we all know boy thick especially those gorgeously thick thighs! but he just thinks they’re too thick. he’s used to seeing oikawa and makki’s slender ones, so when he stands in front of the mirror in a pair of swim shorts he bought and they’re swinging on his waist but about to rip around his thighs he can feel himself start to tear up. and then, what a suprise, you walk in!
~ start story:)): “ ‘sei! you ready to go, oh are you okay?”. he whips his head around to see you standing in the doorway in the swim set you just bought your self. ‘god you look so good’ he thinks to himself. “uh yeah yeah i’m good just need a few minutes these uh, they don’t fit.” he brings a hand to his face and uses his index finger and thumb to wipe the tears in the corner of his eyes. “oh well then you can just tie the strings, that’s what they’re there for, i told you to go a size down silly”. you stand infront of him and start to tie the strings in the shorts around his waist. “no doll, they aren’t to big, they’re to small look” he motions his head to the way they’re straining around his thighs and he just wants to start crying again. “oh i see, we’ll theres nothing we can do there , is there? we’ll just buy another pair on the way.” how? he thinks. how are you not laughing in his face that his legs are to fat to fit in a pair of shorts that are 2 sizes to big for him? “i know what you’re thinking,” your soft voice breaks him out of his thoughts. “why is she not laughing at me huh? she probably thinks i’m fuckin’ ugly” you do your best to mimic his deep voice but just sound silly trying, making him let out a small laugh. “how many times have i told you how much i adore your legs hm? how many times have i done, such oh so sinful things on them while going on about how much i love them?. to many to count issei. so next time you think all those silly bad thoughts just think of me and every time i tell you nice things about them!”. now he’s definitely crying, but this time over how much your words helped him. and now he feels like a million dollars as he struts across the beach to the three men waiting for you with his neon orange shorts tied around his waist and clinging to his thighs. end story :))~
jesus i forgot about his legs. anyway, all his life he’s been told how ‘lanky he is’ and how long his legs are. this makes him feel like shit really,most of his jeans stop above his anlke so the only type of socks he had is the long ones that he uses to hide his ankles fromm people, making them think he has the perfect size. he’ll never forget the time he spent hours shopping with his mother and trying on countless pairs of trousers for an upcoming wedding that and they stop above his ankle. he feels embarrassed really, seeing the fitter tell him they can just get them custom made, but it’ll cost more plus the original price. watching how distressed his mother gets when he tells her how much it’ll be. he doesn’t want his mother spending that much money on a pair of trousers he’ll wear once so he butts in saying it’s fine and he’ll deal with it by wearing black socks and no one will notice. the same exact problem happens several years later except in his mother’s place is makki along with oikawa and iwa, watching him get fitted for your wedding. he tells himself ‘think of (y/n), think of (y/n) and how much she says she loves your legs’ but it’s hard to when all the other men have no problem finding the perfect suit size. he doesn’t want to pay extra for a custom suit but that’s what it looks like is going to happen.
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-end <3
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laurie-stark · 3 years
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Bags
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(not my gif)
Summary: After another duffle bag of supplies washes up on shore, the girls realize that they’re going to be stuck here for a while. Episode six rewrite. 3.0k words. 
Pairings: Toni Shalifoe x fem!reader 
Warnings: Swearing, throwing up
A/N: Okay listen I just wanted Toni fanfic but no one was writing it so here you go. Also I really tried too hard to get the bed sharing trope LEAVE ME ALONE I LIKE IT PSLFDLJ (this is your reminder to turn on Interactivefics xx) oh and also theres a bit in here thats heavily inspired by @ drewstarkeys Toni fic which you all should go read asap its amazing. 
This was weird. It was really fucking weird. It had only been four days since we found Jannette’s grave empty. Four days since we found a clean water source. The longer we stayed on this god forsaken island, the more it felt like we were never getting off. And now another round of duffle bags have shown up. You know, as crazy as I think she is sometimes, Leah’s starting to have a point. Something is way off about this place. 
Nora and Rachel were the ones who spotted the bags. They washed up on the rocky side of the beach, covered in weeds. Dot was hoping for some more food, maybe more medicine if we were lucky. But to all our confusion, all the bags contained were blankets and pillows. Ten pillows and five blankets, Dot so cheerfully announced. My first red flag was that the insides were completely dry. I didn’t want to say anything though. I was sure there was a reason for this.
“There’s enough shit here for us to double up,” Dot told us while Nora and I laid out the makeshift beds. “Except for one person who gets to sleep alone.” 
“Well that’s not fair, why does one person get a bed all to herself?” Rachel asked, standing up defensively. 
I rose to my feet as well. “Why don’t we rotate it?” I suggested, hoping to relieve some of the tension. “W-with our off days. That way whoever’s off can have an extra good night’s sleep before they have to work again?” The girls all nodded their heads and mumbled words of agreement. Rachel sat back down on her log. 
“Great idea y/n. So who’s bunking with who?” Dot asked. Rachel and Nora instinctively reached out for each other. Beside me, Toni looked to Martha. Martha gave Toni a weary look before reaching a hand out in the opposite direction. Towards Shelby. Even I had to stop myself from dropping my jaw. 
Fatin gleefully agreed to pair with her “new bestie for the restie,” Dot. That left myself, Toni and Leah. I glanced between them. Leah was avoiding my eye and Toni...Toni just looked mad. It’s not that I don’t like Leah, I just don’t know her. Not that I know Toni any better, but at least Toni hasn’t gone batshit crazy more than once. On the other hand though, I didn’t find Leah unbelievably beautiful the way I did with Toni. And Toni would never want to bunk with me anyway. I crossed my arms, not doing a very good job at hiding my uncomfortableness. I was about to open my mouth to ask Leah to share when Toni called my name. 
“Y/n,” I turned to face her, eyes wide. “You’re with me?” I nod and swallow hard. Fuck. 
The sun was getting lower and lower in the sky, just like our food supply. Rachel offered to go foraging for something meatier in the morning, so at least I could look forward to that.
I shuffled under the blanket Toni and I shared. “Sorry you got stuck with me,” I whispered. “I can go sleep with Shelby if you want, so you can be with Marty?” 
“Nah,” Toni shook her head. “I don’t mind. Besides, I don’t really think Marty wants anything to do with me right now.” I didn’t know what to say. I felt bad for her. A lifetime’s worth of friendship thrown out of the plane. Literally. 
I wondered if anyone else was awake. The light from the fire was enough to see everyone’s feet but that’s about it. I still wasn’t accustomed to how dark it got at night. I was limited to just my hearing after the sun went down. I would try not to listen though. The more you listen, the more you realized how we definitely were not alone out there. Focusing on Toni’s breathing beside me was enough to keep me sane.
Couldn’t say the same for Leah though. She sat straight up and I thought she got bit by a crab or something. 
“Does anyone else think that this is crazy?” She asked us.
Fatin groaned. “Leah, we got into a plane crash. Is that not enough crazy for you?” 
“No seriously Fatin, what the fuck is going on?”
“What are you talking about,” Dot sat up. 
“I mean these,” Leah held up a fist full of her blanket. “Where did they come from? Do none of you think that something’s up?” 
I pushed myself upright. “I’m starting to agree with Leah.”
“Oh God, not you too,” Dot flopped back down onto her back. 
“No, think about it,” I started. “A bag with medicine just happens to show up? And then we find Jannette’s grave empty!? And now these duffles appear with nine peoples worth of blankets and shit? Who brings that to a resort retreat? That’s weird. It’s really fucking weird.” Everyone was sitting up at this point, staring at me. “I didn’t say anything when we opened them, but these things were dry. Everything bone dry. Rachel and Nora found the bags on the shore, like they were washed up. They should have been soaking. Hell, they should have sunk!” I took a shaky breath in. “Every day we stay here the more it feels like we’re not leaving. It’s like someone wants us to stay here. I know I sound crazy but come on!”
“Y/n...” 
“We don’t even remember the crash!”
“We all blacked out.”
“That’s not how plane crashes work though!” I realized how loud I had gotten. I noticed how Nora was sitting, hugging her knees tight. Shelby’s face was pale, even in the orange glow from the fire. I closed my eyes. “This isn’t my first crash.” I kept my eyes shut. I didn’t need to see their faces while I told this story. “I got into another one like eight or nine years ago. The engines broke and we crashed in a forest somewhere near Chicago. And I remember it all. I remember the engines failing, and the plane falling and the back coming off when we hit the trees. I didn’t black out until I was on the ground. So yeah, I think something is fucking off. This isn’t right, none of this is right! We shouldn’t be here, we shouldn’t-” 
I started to choke on my own words. I think I was starting to throw myself into a frenzy. Something grabbed at my hand. It was Toni. She looked me in the eyes. There was something in her gaze that told me I was safe. Told me to calm down.
“Okay,” Dot said slowly. “I think we’re all starting to lose it a little bit Y/n. And no sleep isn’t gonna help. Let’s all try to get some shut eye, yeah?”
I nodded profusely and flipped onto my side, embarrassed now from that outburst. I guess I didn’t realize how far off the rails I’d been slipping. Silently, I started to cry.
I tried to stay as far away from Toni as possible. With my back to her, I figured that my crying could be somewhat camouflaged. I was very wrong.
“Hey,” Toni murmured. When I didn’t respond, she tugged on my shoulder to roll me over. I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks. I couldn’t look at her directly. Her gaze softened. I realized then how close we were. Even in pitch darkness, I could still make out the outline of her face, her cheeks, her nose, her lips- I prayed she couldn’t hear how loud my heart was thumping. Toni reached a hand out and brushed another tear away. Had I started crying again? Jesus I was so far gone. “I know how you feel. I wanna get out of here too.’ I said nothing.
Toni moved to create some more space and put her arm out. I looked at her, questioning, though I doubt she could see my face. “Come here,” she said quietly. “I heard what you told us yesterday, about what your mom says? Sometimes you just need a hug.” I nearly started crying again right there. Slowly, I squirmed closer until my body was curled into hers. I smiled inwards. Besides the fact that my heart was trying to beat right out of my chest, I felt better. We both drifted off soon after.
 I woke up to the sun shining way too bright and the sound of…snickering? I opened my eyes and tried not to get totally blinded by the light. I looked up to see Nora, Fatin and Dot standing over me, all chuckling.
“What?” I mumbled. I must have woken Toni up because she started moving underneath me.
Oh.
That’s why they were laughing.
I had fallen asleep curled into Toni’s side and woken up completely entangled with her. It wasn’t a one-sided thing either, she was holding on to me for dear life. What. The. fuck. I jolted upright, maybe a little too fast because the three girls around us started to laugh more.
“Good morning love birds,” Fatin cooed.
“Shut up,” Toni said, using a hand to shield her eyes. “We were conserving heat.”
“Yeah, what she said,” I smiled. “Is it breakfast already?”
“Not quite,” Dot shrugged. “Martha and Shelby are still getting some berries and shit.”
“Oh well in that case I’m going back to bed,” Toni grunted, rolling over. Her and I were on water duty today, so technically we had no need to be up before breakfast anyway. Dot and the girls made their way back to the fire. I was half awake though. Might as well start the day early too. Except that Toni seemed to have other plans.
Before I had the chance to get up Toni was tugging at my arm, silently asking me to come lay down. I gave in immediately. “Come keep me warm,” she mumbled. And so I did. As I laid my head down onto her chest, I noticed Shelby looking at us. She turned away when she met my gaze, but there was something behind her eyes. Disgust. Great, just what we needed. Stranded in the middle of nowhere with a fucking homophobe.
“Do you think Shelby is homophobic,” I asked lowly.
“I dunno, maybe? Why?”
“No reason, I just….That would be pretty awkward if she was.”
“Yeah…”
 Nora woke me up a second time that day for breakfast. We ate in silence like we had done for the last few days. Food was running short and we were getting antsy. Toni and I broke away from the group after we ate with half of Fatin’s luggage bag. We trekked up and through the forest towards the waterfall. Neither of us said a word the whole trip. I was starting to overthink. Like, heavily overthink. In normal circumstances, overthinking might be appropriate. The night before was…not normal. But these were not ordinary circumstances. The middle of nowhere is probably the best place to have not normal and still be fine. Whatever. Right? Was it weird? Does she think I’m some weird crybaby now? Was that just a pity hug? Am I going absolutely crazy for no reason?
I’d gotten so wrapped up in my thoughts, I didn’t even notice we’d arrived back at camp. As Toni and I got to work, filling bottles to boil, Rachel was shouting from the top of a cliff. She was holding up a sack of something, I couldn’t quite make it out.
“Who’s ready to fucking feast?”
Mussels. Rachel found mussels. Now, I’d never been one for survival training but the one thing I knew was that seafood was a no.
“I really don’t mean to be a bubble burster, it’s just that seafood can be really dangerous,” I explained. Rachel looked like she wanted to take my head off. “And we do not have the vicinities to properly prepare these.”
“So what, you’re saying I’m trying to poison all of us?” Rachel challenged.
“No! No, no, not at all Rach. This was a great find, you did good.” I smiled wearily. “All I’m saying is that maybe someone should sit this one out, you know? Just in case. If we’re all sick then we’ve got no chance.”
“Great then who’s gonna be the starving one?”
“I don’t mind. I got berries.”
 Turns out Shelby wouldn’t eat either. An allergy, I think she said. It felt good to see everyone this happy. Leah was genuinely smiling, Dot seemed a little less stressed. For a second it felt like we were actually on the retreat we were supposed to be on. Toni started to make out with her mussels. Or…well you know, with them. We all found it hilarious. Except for Shelby...
“Fuck you.” And with that Toni was off, running down the beach. I myself was on the brink of tears. Some churches man…they’ll brainwash even the best of 'em. I stared at the sand, not sure where to go. I wanted to chase after Toni, I wanted to stay right here and hide in the sand. The rest of the girls had gone quiet too.
“What?” Shelby asked. “Am I not allowed to have my own beliefs?”
“Not those ones,” I spat. I pushed myself up and jogged around the bend.
I saw Toni near the shoreline. She had her feet in the water. Cautiously, I crept up behind her. I didn’t want to startle her. “You good?”
Toni turned and her stance signaled she was ready for a fight. Her shoulders relaxed when she realized it was just me. “Yeah. No. Whatever, I just need a break from barbie bitch.”
“Yeah, you and me both,” I chuckled. “Will you though? Be okay?”
“You don’t need to worry about me. I’m fine.” She looked back out at the sea.
“G-good. Okay, I, uh…good, I’m glad,” I was muttering. I mutter when I’m nervous. Avoiding eye contact, all that fun stuff.
“Why are you so nervous?” Shit. So she did notice. “I mean you’re chill around everyone else but you get all twitchy around me. What’s with that?” She paused and her face fell a bit. “Do I scare you?”
“Oh god no,” I grasped her hand. “No I promise Toni, I’m not scared of you.”
“Then what?”
I look down at my toes. “I-I um…you-“ I swallow hard. “You’re pretty.”
She didn’t say anything and I was about ready to jump into the ocean and never come back. And then she laughed. She fucking laughed! Oh my god I was going to cry. I felt like I had just been publicly rejected in middle school all over again.
“That was cute,” Toni said, still chuckling a bit. I looked her dead in the eyes and she wasn’t kidding.
“Okay, I’m gonna go back now.” I turned on my heel and started walking back, very briskly might I add. I could not believe that just happened. 
“Yeah me too-“Toni cut herself off and started heaving. I looked back. Toni was throwing up her entire stomach and then some. I rushed to her side, brushing the hair from her face. In the distance, I could see Rachel throwing up too. Oh Jesus Christ.
Shelby and I spent the rest of the day running from girl to girl, holding hair and passing out water. It was one huge haze of running back and forth, trying to make sure no one died. I knew that the mussels were a bad idea. God, how could I be so stupid? This was all my fault. Once Dot resurfaced from the dead, she took charge. Leah was sent to go find the medical bag while Dot and I boiled more water. She had me look over Toni and Marty while she took after the twins.
Toni was not good. By the time I got back to her, she was practically lifeless. Fatin was trying to get her to drink some canned water but it wasn’t working. Matha, who was equally unwell sat by idly, crying into her can of water and trying not to throw up again. I pulled Toni off of Fatin and into my lap, trying to get her to drink the water from my bottle. She kept turning her head away or pushing my hand. I pulled her closer and upright with one arm and got Fatin to hold her face in one place.
“Drink,” I told her. She couldn’t even speak but she shook her head. “Toni, drink. Please. You need to rehydrate for me okay?” I got her to drink a little, but she just couldn’t swallow. Martha started crying at some point. Luckily, Leah made it back with the medicine. 
Trying to fight Toni into taking the pill was not working Especially not when everyone started crowding and screaming at myself and Dot. Shelby crouched to our level and took the pill from Dot. This only made things worse. No way in hell was Toni ever going to accept anything from Shelby. But blondie wasn’t going down without a fight. In one motion, she’d shoved me out of the way and climbed on top of Toni, dropping the pill into her mouth and forcing her to swallow. 
 Night fell and everyone was exhausted. Toni hadn’t woken up since Shelby drugged her and honestly I was getting a little worried she died in her sleep or something. Martha wasn’t looking too hot either. She’d broken into a sweat despite the cold of the night. Everyone else is tucked into their respective beds, dead silent. The cold night air made it easier to relax. After a day like today all i wanted to do was curl up next to Toni and never wake up. 
Beside me, Toni started to stir. The weight I’d been carrying finally lifted off my shoulders. “Toni?”, I chimed. “Are you alive?”
“No,” she grumbled as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. I didn’t give her a moment more to readjust to life before I tackled her in a hug.
“Oh my god, you’re okay.” She laughed at me again, but this time I didn’t mind. Cause she wasn’t dead. Or close to dying. I pulled her back down on top of me. She fell asleep again in my arms. I smiled down at her. Once again, there was a moment where I wasn’t in living hell. It was just me and Toni. Somewhere safe. And warm, preferably. Everything was going to be okay.
 And then Marty dropped dead.
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natromanxoff · 3 years
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19 - The Dynamic Duo V Montreux
Hello folks. I was sitting around twiddling my thumbs and I thought I would give the old hard drive a clean up, so before I dump a load of rubbish I thought I'd better answer these before I throw everything in the recycle bin. Let's start with a lady from New Jersey who goes by the name of Dorothy who gave me a very interesting offer for the next time I'm in New York. If you're reading this Dorothy, could you send Jacky your email address so I can reply to you. I've just opened up a "secret" Hotmail account so I can send replies without pestering the lovely Mrs Smith all the time, and to test it I went to the guestbook and picked a few names at random. Maybe I should reply to the irate drummer, but if I do that he'll just reply to me and the girls in the office will miss out on laughing at him as well. Staying with the skin bashers for a mo, Ron Hansen in Madison is a drummer, and said he liked my jokes and reckons Mr Irate uses three sticks, two in his hands and one up his arse (his words not mine). Would I be correct in saying your a Zep fan Ron? Today's question is, "What do you get if you cross a drummer with a roadie?" The answer is a stupid roadie.
Moving on, last time around I mentioned a drink which we consumed in Brazil, and the charming Sonia and Dina informed me it was called Caipirinha, and a pleasant little tipple it was to. Somewhere in Australia there is a lady called Karen who is listening to the Offspring CD non-stop, so I'm gonna have to try and answer her question as she has such great musical tastes, even though she wants to know the..........(flashing lights, fireworks, drum roll) Hoover Salesman Story. ARGHHHH. Its actually a very short tale, and I think it's quiet boring but it seems to have grown in stature over the years, and as always I'm gonna drag it out and start from the first skiing expedition that I ventured on with RT.
Having checked my trendy little biog mag, I reckon the year is 1980, and the dynamic duo are in Montreux putting the finishing touches to Fun in Space and we have a few days off before a tour starts in Zurich when Rog says, "Let's go skiing." He had skied a few times before and was ok at it, but I had never put a pair of skis on in my life. I said, "Lets go, but you ski and I'll just get pissed." He then went on about what a buzz it is and how I would love it, etc. As we were touring soon our American crew had to fly out, so I called up Jim Devenney and told him to come over a couple of days earlier cause we were gonna ski. Jim is a great skier and was on the first flight available and I picked him up at Geneva airport ready for some fun. That night we hit the town and have too many drinks and Rog goes off to bed semi early, while Jim and myself sat out on the jetty of Duckingham Palace with a ghetto blaster, Derek and Clive tapes, and a vat of wine singing disgusting songs at full blast, which must have echoed over to France. Suddenly we hear a French voice screaming at us and we have no idea what he was saying so we carried on goofing around, and the next thing I hear is a huge splash as Devenney falls in.
Let me assure you that a drunk trying to get a drunk out of Lake Geneva is not an easy task, but we succeed and head back to DP and retire to our rooms. I'd just got into bed when I hear a crash and go to investigate, only to find JD had gone in the wrong room and was trying to get into a baby's cot, and getting him out of there was harder than getting him of the lake.
Next day Roger, Dave Richards, his wife Collette, Jim and myself set off to Zermatt, and on arrival we stock up on skis, passes and other skiing paraphernalia (big words now!) Dinner, drinks and off to bed. Next morning we're up and ready to go, and thinking I'll never ski again after this I refuse to waste money on a ski suit, so I wear jeans. My second wrong move, the first was agreeing to go. The hotel owner wouldn't let us leave the hotel without first drinking a couple of Sambuccas, not my idea of a good breakfast, eggs, bacon, tea, toast and Italian liqueurs, but who are we to refuse. Next I've got to try and walk in those godamn boots, and we eventually arrive at the top of the Matterhorn.
The OK skiers, RT and Dave set off on their own, Collette begins a very slow trip down while JD tells me he'll stay and teach me. On go the skis, and down I go, flat on my arse. Up I get and I'm off, for all of about 2ft before I'm down again. This is not any fun. After a couple more tumbles my great mate Jim said, "If you're gonna f*** around I'm going." And thats the last I saw of him all day. Thanks pal. I'm standing there watching people ski and think, "It can't be that hard. If you stand like this, lean like that, you can ski." So I stand and lean in the correct positions and I'm away, screeching down a mountain with only one very small problem, I have no idea how to turn or stop, so as I'm flying past Collette, and she reckons I looked very worried, I yelled for some advice and all she said was, "DIVE." Sound advice, so thats what I do, and by now I'm getting wet. I wait for her and then we set off together, the blind leading the blind, with me diving at the slightest bit of speed or bend in the piste. A million years later we eventually reach the bottom of this awful slope and it's finally over. Wrong. Theres a T-bar to get on so we wait in line till it's our turn. You're supposed to put the bar just under your bum and it drags you up, but I'm 6ft and Collettes about 5ft 5in, so the bar was either in the middle of her back or around my knees, and no one told me not to sit on the f***ing thing and we bounced around for a while until we fell off. I'm now getting really pissed off with all this, "Get me a helicopter," I demanded from Collete. She told me they don't just send them, you have to be hurt. I replied with, "I'll break my f***ing arm but I've gotta get off this mountain." Realising I'm not getting a copter I light a ciggie and ponder.
We agree to split up and go with someone our own height, so I ended up with a great German guy who was really helpful. Once on the T-bar I can see that it goes way up and I would have to ski back down to base camp, and in case you've forgotten, I can't ski, so I said that I was gonna bail out, and jumped off. I then head of in a straight line to the cable car, skis on the shoulder and wading through 3ft of snow in a pair of very heavy and very cold jeans. What seemed like hours of wading I make civilisation and head to the bar for a triple strength coffee and a triple scotch while everyone gawked at me cause I looked like I had a shower fully clothed. Yeah, I wanna do this again.
Dinner that night was great fun for the others cause they got to take the piss out of me. Their day will come. The rest of the nights activities shall remain sealed away, but a good time was had by one and all. The tour went smoothly and I try and put Zermatt behind me, except Collette, still to this day, takes great delight in telling everyone about it, and everytime she says it she makes me look more and more pathetic.
The next winter appears and I'm at home and the phone rings, "CT, wanna go skiing?" To which my reply was nothing like, "Oh I'd love to you fabulous little drummer boy." I can't believe he talked me into it again, but this time we were gonna do things correctly and go to Aviemore in Scotland and take lessons, this was the saving factor in his plan. So once again we pile into the Range Rover and aim north. We split the driving (for a change) and had a good journey up through the snow covered mountains till we get to the resort. A usual night was on the cards, dinner, drinks and bed, then up bright and early for some lessons and a good day on the slopes. This time we've both got the correct outfits so we head off to where our little group of idiot skiers are. We're all standing in a line, with Rog and me at the end, and each person gets to snow-plough a few feet. These clowns have less idea than my first try, and it's also incredibly cold and we've now got icicles hanging off our hair. It's our turn and we both look like olympic champions, but the only thing wrong with getting it right the first time is that the instructor then turns his attentions back to the start of the line. Here I am once again standing on the top of a mountain, freezing cold with two 'things' stuck on the end of a pair of stupid boots, and I inform His Royal Highness that the next trip away involves sand and sun, no excuses, end of argument. RT agreed that this wasn't much fun and thought my idea worth considering.
We finally heard the two magic words, "Lunch Break." We're gone in search of some good HOT food and a nice beaujolais, and we found both. We also found that the hotel bar had an amazing selection of whisky, and we had to try as many as possible. We're now semi pissed and decide that as we're warm we might as well go back to this lesson even though we are very late, and the instructor looked at us and said, "Where have you two been?" Rog came back with "Trying lots of your wonderful scotch's." He was fine with that answer and we carried on trying to learn something, and would you believe by the end of the day I could actually turn and stop.
Back to the hotel for a nap before dinner. Over a very nice meal and a couple of little drinkettes we agree that it's far to cold here and we'll clear off the next day, so into the bar we go with our earlier mission of trying all the scotch's. We were sitting at a table chatting away and cracking jokes with each other and end up talking to the couple on the next table, swapping skiing stories, needless to say mine were very short, and having a bit of a laugh, when the woman said, "What do you two do for a living?" God knows why, but I said; "We're Hoover salesmen." At first they didn't believe us but we both started going on about the difference between domestic and industrial cleaners, uprights, backpack types, ones you pull along the floor. We went on about the different wattage, suction power, the amount of pressure on Axminsters and Wilton carpets, even a couple of car expressions like overhead this and thats. What the hell do we know about vacuum cleaners? But boy are we good at this. After about 30 mins of utter bullshit the subject finally changed and they wished us all the best with our door to door salesmanship and off they went to bed. We then had to reassure each other what we actually did for a living, had some more drinks and tried to work out how we knew so much about cleaners as both of us have spent most of our lives trying to stay well away from them. We spent the drive back to London having a good laugh about the one day we spent in a Scottish ski resort.
Well that's it folks, the story of a small company, R & C Taylor,..... Hoover Salesmen. I did learn to ski quite well, and whilst in Gstadd doing the Shove it album Spike flew out cause he fancied learning to ski, and the fool asked me to teach him. I wasn't much help because everytime he fell over I burst out laughing cause I kept seeing myself in Zermatt, and Spike looked just as worried and stupid as I did.
Before I go I noticed that Jacky had to get her boiler fixed and said for me not to make a comment, but little things like that spark me off and I remembered that when we were recording in the Townhouse Studios I had a little, no a big affair with the studio chef. Every three months Virgin would do a magazine for all their staff, written by all the heads of various departments, airlines, studios, video, shops, films, etc. and they would say what was going on with their particular section. Alan Douglas, who was chief engineer of all Virgin studios wrote who was recording where, and he wrote, "Queen are in studio 4, and Crystal, their main man is stoking the kitchen boiler." I thought that was hilarious, but Jane went ballistic. That's it for now.
Loadsa luv Crystal (Carpet cleaner to the stars)
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Note
He did? Umm.. what happened exactly?
(referring to this post)
my 11th grade chemistry teacher had an associates degree in liberal arts.
you know how in virtually every class you’ve ever had since middle school, your teachers made a big stink about the syllabus? she didn’t have one. this was her first teaching job, which she got because of her length experience as a substitute, not by her licensing qualifications. we were, at first, excited to have her, because she was a “fun sub” and we were 17 years old and stupid as all shit. we were the “normal chem” class in a system where the only other options were “honors chem” which was filled with children who actually know how to study (or cheat) and have an air of proper student activity, and “AP Chem”, which is clear enough if you’ve been an american student in the last 15 years.
she followed the mcgraw hill chemistry book in order of chapters, despite the fact that our state standardized tests did several of the chapters out of order. ever notice how you’ll suddenly be looking at chapter 11 when just last week you were on chapter 5, then the next week you’re on chapter 8? standardized testing is the reason. anyways by asking my friends in other classes who had chemistry teachers of relative competence, i was able to discern which chapters i should focus on, and while she was distracted with literally watching youtube videos all period, I was turning around in my seat and walking across the classroom helping my friends and enemies with the packets. (she was a two-packets-a-week kinda teacher.)
yes i said enemies too. the people i hated, i hated because they were sons of bitches i wouldnt piss on to put out a fire. i hated them so dearly i used to pray to god that they would bump into me so i could throw myself into the concrete and split my forehead open and get them expelled due to the blood-clause of our “zero-tolerance policy”. two of the kids in my class had, only the previous year, attempted to set my hair on fire.
i hated the teacher more. 
it gave me extreme pleasure to see her fume and clench her fists when a student would say “i need help” across the classroom and she would move to get up and they would say “oh not you miss, im waiting for vicky.” jesus christ the only time ive ever felt a comparable high was when i was at a halloween party in college where i was literally so zooted i couldn’t move.
it got worse over time, her getting more and more angry, my ego growing larger and larger. i was a huge bitch in high school, i really thought i was the smartest bitch in the room at any given moment. severe main character syndrome. imagine that kind of person actually being right for 45 minutes out of every day. can you even comprehend the kind of frustration that would create? in a room full of little sociopaths who dont give a shit about anything but getting this joke of a class over with so they can graduate? your first real teaching job and they look right past you, the teacher, to this annoying little shit whose grades are completely abysmal? how are they managing to learn anything from a child who can barely speak in front of more than 10 people? who turns cherry red in the face of literally every authority figure in the building except you? who can’t concentrate and stay still in one spot for more than five minutes? all of your other classes behave! they listen! they sit down and shut up and do the packets! so what fucking gives!!!
so you say “fine, since you all HATE ME so much i just won’t teach then!!!” on literally week fucking ten of teaching. and instead of prostrating themselves before you, begging you to like... point at transparencies and read directly from powerpoints i guess.
and they all collectively say “okay” and let the chipmunk child flutter between desks and help them memorize formulas and mnemonic devices and shit. surely her grades will suffer if she’s constantly dealing with other people and you’ll have justification that her horseshit is “distracting” and “a detriment to her studies”. she got bored gave up on that after two days after nothing changed.
then we did the midterm.
except at the end of the exam packet was something we never learned because again, she was going through the book chronologically. because i actually enjoyed the chem book (so much that i stole it when the year was up lmao), i knew the material.
it was about lewis dots/structures. i couldn’t tell you a damn thing about it today but in december 2010 i absolutely knew that shit. i didnt have too much of a problem with it in the exam, but the students who had gotten to that point were complaining and at first she pulled that “you should have been studying independently uwu” shit but the class was about to get loud during exam period so she shushed us and said that when we get to that point, just stop, and she’ll mark it correct during grading, no harm no foul just keep it quiet. one of the more confrontational students called horseshit and said theres no way we’re trusting that and there’s definitely no way anyone will keep an entire classroom cheating at the instruction of the teacher quiet.
i offered to teach it.
she scoffed, rolled eyes, said “sure fine but you can’t get your exam back” and i said “okay.” so when everyone was to the point in the exam, we piled them all on her desk and i used the whiteboard to briefly and quietly explain lewis dots, used the book examples and problems, and helped the other kids understand. there were a couple exam questions that were lifted straight from the book problems so i skipped those. while teaching i realized i had gotten a couple wrong which sucked :( it was an incredibly stupid experience overall, and no teacher worth the paper their certification is printed on would have allowed that to happen. and fucking yet.
anyways everyone but me got their exams back and finished it and many of us passed, only a few of them did particularly well.
discussing the chem exam with friends who also took the chem exam, many students found their anecdote about the lewis dots to be confounding, for you see, the exam we took was not, in fact, the midterm, but the god damned final.
she had us taking the fucking final because she didnt read the fucking folders which read “midterm” and “final exam” on them
she was reprimanded severely and we all had to take the exam on different days, in different classrooms, sitting very far apart. after that she hated me even more. like girl it was your fault lmao i am literally a teenager grow up lol. anyways you can imagine how much more fucking insufferable i became, knowing how miserable she was.
it all came to a head in february when some students were giggling quietly following a minor fuck up on her part regarding bellwork. they were making fun of her like “are you sure thats not tomorrows bellwork lol” and a friend next to me did the “hey i need help wait no miss not you sorry” thing and when i answered him, she solidly snapped. blah blah YOURE SOOOO DISTRACTING blah blah YOU THINK YOURE SOOOO SMART DONT YOU blah blah blah and she was like demanding i leave the room and shouting at the top of her lungs at me “ YOU POISON THE MINDS OF EVERY OTHER STUDENT HERE. YOU’RE POISONOUS VICTORIA, YOU’RE A VIRUS IN THIS CLASSROOM.”
i will never forget that line as long as i live. it was like crack to me. i moved to open the door to leave and the vp opened it first. he escorted me to the office and asked me what happened, then told me to keep my head down in class from now on, and that if i wanted to help my friends i should give them my number and help them out on our own time. i was like “bro thats really stupid” and he was like “thats all we can do right now but i promise we’re working on it”
i lasted the rest of the year giving smug smiles as we did packet after fucking packet for the rest of the year. they were all take-home work. i wasnt comfy giving my number to my enemies. the class camaraderie ended.
the final was altered. my class took a different final than the rest of the normal chem classes.
i started 12th grade and got a solid case of senioritis. i told that story to anyone who would listen. while it was happening, i obviously told my favorite teacher everything as it happened. when i mentioned it senior year he was like “oh yeah i forgot about her,
she was fired over the summer.”
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tick-fic-nick · 3 years
Text
Braids, Family, and Tickles
word count: 1784
Summary: No one in the mighty nein knew that Caduceus was ticklish until Jester made a little discovery. He finds out that a peaceful day can take quite the chaotic turn.
characters: (Caduceus, Jester, Beau, Fjord)
Warnings: (Tickling)
Caduceus was sitting alone on the floor in his room with the door open, in the Xorehouse. He had been meditating for an hour, when he heard someone (not so sneakily) enter his room. He opened one eye to look to see who had come in, though he was sure he already knew. He saw Jester sitting down a few feet away from him with her sketch book and regular paints.
He fully opened his eyes now and gave a small chuckle, "hello Jester." He sound happy to see her.
Jester looked up to meet his gaze with surprised
"Oh my gosh, im sorry Caduceus I didn't mean to disturb you, I just wanted to draw you but it was hard to get a good angle out there."
His posture had relaxed and he pushed his hair away from his face. "Its alright, do you need me to pose? Or should I just do what I was doing?"
She put a finger to her chin, in a show of contemplation, "Well, what if you were in a really silly pose?" She jokingly suggested " Like you could be doing a handstand or make a really funny face?"
Her suggestions made his features curl up into a smile "Well I havent done a handstand in many years. I dont think i could do one even if I tried," he brushed the hair away from his face again, "i dont know if I can make a silly face."
"Do you want to try?"
"Sure." He takes a second to think about the face he'll make before his eyes go crossed, brown furrows, face scrunched up, and he just barely sticks his tounge out. He turns to Jester "is this, uh, is this silly?"
Now the face that he makes isn't to terribly funny, but the way he executed it just makes Jester laugh, "hahaha thats a really good silly face Caduceus! But you don't have to keep that up, I can draw you how you normally are."
He had his face go back to normal, and then moved his hair out of his face again "Thats good, my mother always said that if you kept making a face that it would get stuck that way"
"Caduceus is your hair bothering you?"
He moved his hair again
"Oh, well. Its just been like this today, theres nothing I can really do about it."
"Well, why don't I help braid your hair? I used to help my Mama do her hair before her performances, I wouldn't mind helping get it out of your face for you." She already started putting her sketchbook to the side along with her paints.
"I guess I wouldn't mind, if your offering."
Jester sat up on the bed and had caduceus sit on the ground in front of her. She took his long mohawk in one hand and started to think about how she should go about doing this. She finally started to make a French braid. Weaving his hair, she could tell he was leaning into her just a little bit. Which he was.
"I always love my Mama doing this for me, do you like it?"
"Yeah, I'd say I do. It actually feels a little tickly."
"Tickly?" She laughed "like ants tickly? Or like this?" And she used her tail to lightly go over one of his ears. He twitched his ear and snorted, batting her tail away. "Caduceus! Stay still, I almost lost a hold of your braid!" She teased.
"I cant sit still if you tickle my ear" he deadpanned. Though there was a slight tinge of red to his cheeks, but Jester couldn't see it.
"Okay, okay!" She grinned, and continued her work. After a few more minutes she finished the braid and tied it off with a band she hand around her wrist. Hopping off the bed she stood in front of him, and looked at her hard work. "Oh my gosh, Caduceus, it looks great!"
"Does it really?" He stood up and looked at the mirror in his room and gave a laugh, "thats funny."
"Whats that?"
He looked down at her "I look like my sister." He chuckled again looking back into the mirror, not seeing Jester look of mischeif.
"You know caduceus." She walked closer to him "I dont think anyone even knew your were ticklish."
He froze for a second, before he turned to her and put his arm at her forehead. Impending her movement forward. "I have siblings Jester, I wouldn't do that if I were you."
Her goody smile turned into one of determination "well if you going to play that card, then im going to play my own!" She walked away from him and ran out the room and down the stairs.
It didn't quite click to him that she was getting reinforcements, so he picked up her sketchbook and paints of a nearby shelf.
                                         ______________________
It was a little bit later, after dinner. Most of them were sitting in their living room except for Caleb and Veth who were working on a spell, and Yasha, who went to her balcony to listen to a nearby storm.
The rest were having a nice conversation and enjoying each others presence, Caduceus had put a pot tea on to start cooking and got up to get it when it was ready. When he got back he put the tea on the center table to cool off, and took his spot on the floor.
They were talking nonsense about a schrodingers skeleton, or something of the such, whatever it was, it was amusing.
Though the conversation was stopped when Caduceus snorted, and his arms came to protect his ear and neck. The culript of this reaction sitting next to him with a bright smile on her face.
Fjord looked up with amusement at him "Caduceus are you alright?"
He stammered, his face flushed "oh well, I--" he was cut off by Jester
"Oh, hes fine Fjord. He's just a little ticklish."
"Caduceus, your ticklish?" Beau looked up towards the tall firbolg, who has a wobbly nervous smile.
Jester answered for him again sitting a bit closer to him "his ears are, but I dont know about the rest of him." She reached out her hands but she got stopped again by his arm to her forehead.
He put up his other hand to the other two "yes I am ticklish, but if you tickle me I will get every single one of you back for it."
Fjord look towards to Beau, with a mischievous grin "Beau, did you hear that? I think he just threatened us? How rude"
"Yeah, its almost like he's asking for us to teach him some manners" she looks back towards Fjord playfully punching her fists into her palms.
"Oooohh Caduceus, your in so much trouble!" Jester wiggles her fingers towards him without getting any closer because of his arm. His flush spread to his ears and neck, he quickly turned away from her and looked at the others.
Though he panicked when he only saw fjord right in front of him. He tried to turn around to look behind him but he was pulled down onto the floor by Beau, who had stuck up behind him.
He looked up at the three who stood over him, which seemed to spark many memories of his childhood tickle fights with his siblings. Beau climbed up and sat right on his waist, making sure he can't move. Jester hopped over to his head and sat next to it, playing with the cloth near his shoulders and neck. Fjord sat near his knees and legs.
Beau looked down at him, mostly deadpanning, but he could sense some satisfaction when she said "its nothing personal, man. Think of it more like uh.. an initiation!"
Jester spoke up and leaned over his head, her face upside down from his angle "yeah, totally. Cause you always sit out our tickle fights caduceus."
Fjord peaked around from beau "its almost a right of passage." But caduceus could quiet see any of them. His hands rest on top of his rosy face.
He groaned, "please just get it over with, you guys are horri---EEe"
His request was cut off from a squeak that erupted from his mouth with died down into soft almost quiet giggles. His body shook and he squirmed at the tickly feeling getting poked and proded around his torso.
Jester followed Beau's lead and playfully jumped her fingers around his neck and ears. His giggling got audible with her contribution and the hands that were covering his face twitched and flung to her hands trying to catch them.
"Hehehehehe wahahahait! Dohohohont! Ahahaha hehelp"
Fjord voice popped up through the laughter "help? I think I can assist you, Caduceus."
"Nohoho!"
"Oh nonsense I'm happy to help. Do tell me though, is this a good spot?" His hands spidered around Caduceus' knees, even though there was he was wearing his normal baggy pants, it didn't seem to matter. His volume increased quite a bit. So did his squirming. His legs shook and wiggled, trying to get away from the tickling. "~I think it is~"
"Nohohohoho! Not thahahahat kihihihind of hehehehehelp!"
"How about this then" jesters voice said right before he felt one of his arms getting restrained by Jester. She then started to slowly poke and scratch down his restrained arm teasing the sensitive area. "Is this helping?"
He shook his head no and started whining clawing at her hand with his other arm, but no use "Not thehehehere Jehehehester"
"Why? Is it tooooo ticklish?" She attacked on the last word wiggling her fingers down into his hollowed pit.
His laughter started to boom, and go up an octave. Beau suddenly found it more difficult to stay straddled on her firbolg friend. And jester almost lost her hold on his arm.
"HAHAHA, STAHAHAP STAHAHAP. NOHOHOHO! UHUHUNCLE! UHUHUN HAHA"
Both fjord and beau stopped tickling and just watched jester slow down and unrestrained his arm. His laughter just stayed at giggling.
Beau got up off caduceus, and stood up looking down at the giggling, out of breath firbolg on the floor "hey man, you good?" She asked
His giggles had mostly subsided and one of his hands still covered his face. He looked at each of them. His wobbly smile turned into an amused smirk. "You all, are in such trouble"
Everyone gave amused somewhat concerned looks at each other while caduceus got up and walked towards the tea pot that he'd set down earlier. He picked it up with one hand and looked back to the three, slightly out of breath.
"Hey look, the teas ready"
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virtual-luvr · 4 years
Text
Not fair
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Pairing: Sero x Reader
Pronouns: gender neutral; they/them
Warning: angst at first, if theres anything else i should tag as a warning pls tell me <3
Description: did Sero really not notice how much you liked him??
Note: this is defenetly not based off of my daydreaming before going to bed
------------------
Sero had his knees tucked to his chest, head held down so that nobody noticed the tears pricking from his eyes. Big droplets falling onto the fabric of his U.A uniform.
He is breath hitches hearing footsteps near him. He desperately hopes no one catches him, god, it be embarrassing if someone caught him crying.
He didn't want people to think of him as weak.
The footsteps suddenly stop and a figure is sat right in front of him
The figure crouches down and pats Sero's head
Sero looks back at the figure, tears streaming down his face still and he raises both his shaky hands to desperately clean his tears away.
"What's wrong Sero?" You say, tilting your head to the side, worried for your friend
You sit down in front of him, a small frown etched onto your face
"I-its nothing" he hics and stutters while standing up, trying to move his wobbly legs
You swiftly stand up with him and catch him when he's about to fall
"Please Sero talk to me, what's wrong?"
He just sighs, looking down at fiddling with his hands he only give you a small response saying, "its okay, i have to go to class"
And before you could utter out another word he's running off to his classroom.
The frown on your face is back and you grumble as you walk to your own classroom, dragging your feet against the floor.
Even through your whole lecture you were thinking about how you caught Sero in that state, you were seriously worried.
Walking out of the classroom your eyes meet with Ururaka and she gives you a kind smile. Waving at her you run your way over to her and say your greetings towards everyone else in the group.
"Hey Ururaka I need to talk with you"
She gives you a small "hm?" And you both walk somewhere more private other cooing and whistling seeing you both walk alone
Sero sees this and frowns, thinking just like the others that it was a confession and it makes him remember the reason why he was having that breakdown in the first place.
No one liked him, atleast not in that way. Or well thats what he thought.
Not like he'd tell anyone that though
That would be weird, wouldnt it?
Back to you and Ururaka
She softly gasps when you tell her the news, covering her mouth her eyes well up with small tears similar to how Sero was before. She hated seeing or hearing that her friends are sad and when you told her the news she almost broke down as well.
"Do you know why he was like that??" She asks while rubbing at her eyes
"Im not sure, he ran off before i could really ask. But i wanted you to know just in case you could maybe help. I've tried to talk to him these days but he's ignored me" you frown for the third time that day, by your own words at that.
Its really made you sad that he's been ignoring you.
She puffs out her cheeks, her eyes filled with determination, "dont worry (Y/N) ill make sure to find out whats the cause of it, just leave to me!"
And just like that shes off as well
You grab your backpack and hold on tight to it while walking to the cafeteria to get some food
--------------
Sero walked with his friends, head hung low and his usual smile was duller then how it normally was.
"Hey a little birdie told us they saw you crying, are you okay Sero?" Ururaka abruptly says
"What-?" Sero looks at her, chuckling nervously, rubbing at the back of his neck, a habit of his.
"They were really worried about you, did something happen Sero?"
He really felt cornered this time, all his friends waiting for his answer. He chewed on nails and gave out a sigh.
"Its just not fair" he says
"All you guys are so pretty, and smart. And your quirks are amazing and then there's just me with...tape"
They all stood shock and bewildered
Sero keeps on talking
"And ive seen so many people confess to you guys!! Ive never even gotten one confession, i feel like nobody like me in...that way"
He sat there, talking as if there clearly wasn't a person who had a crush on him,
When the person from the next door class has been crushing on him since the day they met.
As if you weren't around the corner listening to what he had to say
Did he really not notice your feelings for him?
You were sad to see him talk so bad about himself, you had never seen him act this way
"Are you an idiot?"
"I cant believe you said that in front of us, in front of (Y/N)!"
"What about (Y/N)?? They're not here--"
God he really was oblivious
"Im here Sero" you walk around the corner giving Sero a sad smile
"Oh (Y/N) hey-"
"Sero that's really not manly of you to say, we all love you, (Y/N) especially!"
You blush at Kirishimas comment, "hey stop it no need to tell Sero that"
"Tell me what?" Sero looks between the both of you, still oblivious to everything
Everybody mentally facepalms except you, they had enough of you both pining for each other without even noticing the others feelings
Ururaka and Kirishima push you closer towards each other and then everyone in group besides you two run away as fast as possible.
An awkward silence falls on the both of you
"Uhm-"
"Sero i dont know how you haven't noticed yet but i really like you please dont think that nobody likes you in that way because i do and have for a long time i mean you barely have any brain cells sometimes but thats okay because i dont either and your smile brightens up my day plus when you use your tape for pranks i find it really funny and-"
You stop your rambling, you didn't want to embarrass yourself just in case he didn't like you in that way
You look at Sero in the eyes and he smiles so brightly it makes your heart melt
There it is
The smile you fell in love with.
Small tears well up in the corners of his eyes and you inch your hands towards his face to wipe them away, but he grabs your face and pulls you toward him
Crashing his lips against yours he smiles into the kiss, you stumble a bit but try to stand your ground even while Sero has a death grip on your collar
"Ser- wAit- we're in pubLIC" you yell out in between kisses
You grab at the back of his uniform so you can at least pull him back from you to breath a bit but its useless, he keeps on kissing you and you receive small pecks all around your face.
"Im guessing thats an 'i like you back'" you say out of breath
"Hell yeah!!"
[1212 words; august/8/2020]
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scarletwidowaf · 3 years
Text
Ghost Of You - Chapter 4
AN: this is my favorite chapter so far! Its Mostly fluff and wholesome. Again, didn't checked mistakes so I'm sorry in advance .
words count: 1880
masterlist | story index | AO3 | wattpad 
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The two ex-avengers were lying on their motel shared bed.
The place was in a pretty good condition which was a nice change after the last 4 motels the group found themselves at.
Natasha was lying under the covers, her red long hair in a messy bun and a book in hand.
Next to her, Wanda was sleeping peacefully.
The younger woman was finally getting better after the brutal cold she suffered from in the last few days.
Natasha couldn't help but appreciating how cute and peaceful she was.
Her hair messy, nose red and cheeks flushed.
Thats how their evening went.
Wanda peacefully sleeping while Natasha reading a book and glancing at the younger woman every now and then.
At some point, when Natasha glanced at the brunette next to her she met with green eyes, who were watching her curiously
Natasha couldn't help but smiling at the sight in-front of her.
"Is everything okay?" She asked.
Wanda nodded weakly.
"You love reading, dont you" wanda asked.
"I do. It was something i loved doing ever since i was a kid."
"Why?"
"Many reasons, its comforting and enjoyable and in a way, its an escape, even if its just momentarily"
"Do you feel the need to escape?"
"Like right now? From this bed?" Natasha asked confused, a small smile on her lips.
Wanda smiled but didn't answer.
"So, What are you reading this time?"
"The Catcher in the rye. Its a classic"
"Is that so? Will you read to me?" Wanda asked, her cheeks getting flustered (even more than it already was).
"You dont have to of course, i didn't really thought how weird it might seem-" wanda ramble and Natasha smiled before moving her attention back to the book.
"That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they're not much to look at, or even if they're sort of stupid, you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can."
She read out loud, cutting the girl mumbling.
Natasha looked at wanda again.
The younger girl's body was pressed to her side, as she was clinging to her for warmth. Wanda looked at Natasha with a smile.
"Making sure I'm listening?"
"Something like that" she responded.
Wanda smiled at her. Her eyes sparkle.
That moment Natasha couldn't help but smile.
'Jesus christ', she thought, 'they really can'
____
"Natasha?"
Wanda felt stupid as she called Natasha's name into air.
How do you even call a dead person? She thought.
The young woman stood in the middle of the no where in particular, not far from her cabin.
A red pickup truck parks not far and its headlights illuminate the woods, where it begin to darkened.
The sun was half way down and the sky was painted in beautiful shades of orange, red and purple.
Wanda chose this spot because of the beautiful view it revealed, a small waterfall was pouring from a spot not far from her and into a lake. It was truly a sight.
Wanda really thought things trough this time.
she wasn't sure what the future holds for the two women but she was tired of wasting their precious time with fighting and crying over their bad luck. So she organized a date for them.
She spread a big mat on the floor and layered it with many blankets and pillows and even lit some candles around them, far from something that could catch fire yet close enough to light the space.
She even organized a picnic basket full of food and snacks natasha loved and some surprises for the date.
And most importantly she was definitely dressed to impress.
A high waisted skinny jeans, the ones who made her ass look extra good and she knew Natasha liked (she knew that since she wore it a few days before the snap when the two women traveled in the streets of Paris and natasha's thoughts were very loud while she walked behind her)
With a white top who didn't leave much space for imagination, cleavage and toned stomach were visible and wanda just hoped the weather will stay as warm as it was.
After shouting natasha's name over 10 times the younger woman got frustrated.
Wanda was about to give it up, sit and cry while eating cake but when she was about to turn around she met with Natasha smiling at her.
The older woman was dressed differently, which was odd, it seems like although she was dead she could do almost everything (except touching wanda which was frustrating enough), she could hold a book and read, she could eat food (although hunger was never an issue for her) and she could change clothes.
When they found out the older girl could do that natasha was pleased, relieved to change into something that wasn't the clothes she died with.
Natasha was leaning against wanda's truck, an amused smile painted on her red lips.
"You called?" She said with a lighter tone and wanda sigh in frustration.
"How long where you watching me like a creep, romanoff?"
"Long enough" natasha moved from tree to wanda's side. Her eyes scanning Wanda.
"I was just enjoying the view" she said. Her tone flirty.
To make things worse she even bit her lip, making wanda's cheeks grow red.
Wanda smiled before she sat on the pile of blankets and waited for natasha to occupy the spot next to her.
"Do I'm making you feel uncomfortable?" Natasha asked when she sat.
"Not at all nat. Im just not used to get this kind of attention. You were always holding yourself back and vision was.. you know.. vision" wanda confessed.
Natasha smiled softly.
"Well, i was a coward and vision was vision so.."
Both women smiled at each other. Their eyes sparkle with joy.
"So, what's up with the setting, not that I complain" the older women said as her eyes traveled to wanda's outfit.
"I wanted to arrange something for you. As a apology for bringing you back purely"
"You always arrange a super romantic date in the middle of the woods as an apology? Because if this is the case i think i deserve many of those after all this time"
Natasha joked and wanda rolled her eyes.
"You're an ass you know that?"
"Ive been told"
"So, what's in the basket?" Natasha asked.
Instead of answering Wanda opened it lid and pulled out the first item. A headpiece she made herself.
Natasha stared at the white flower crown with confusion.
"Why-" she started asking and wanda cut her off.
"I made this for you. For your birthday"
"Okay first of all: This is not my birthday and you know it, and two: you remember I'm dead, right?" Natasha said with a raised eyebrow, yet didn't show any sign of resistance when wanda put it on her head.
"I know its not your birthday, but I missed 5 years of life, so i think i deserve an extension"
Wanda couldn't help her smile when she saw Natasha with the crown. The older girl's cheeks were a bit flushed and she bit her bottom lip to hold her smile. Her green eyes sparkle with joy and warmth.
"I love it" natasha admitted
"Good, because there's a cake too"
"Of course there's a cake" natasha said in amusement.
Wanda smiled brightly before she turned back to the basket and started to take out the edible items in it.
Natasha couldn't help her staring, the younger woman was beautiful, just as she remembered and even more. The Wanda Natasha was looking at at this moment was not the same Wanda she remembered.
It was like wanda somehow managed to grow up at her absence and natasha couldn't help but appreciate the women she became.
"Are those burgers from bob and Amy's?" Natasha smiled and wanda nodded
"I know that they're your favorite" wanda said as she pass Natasha her burger.
"You're kinda perfect you know that?"
"Ive been told"
By the time they finished their burgers while holding a general conversation the sun was already gone and the only light that's been left was the from the candles and wanda's truck headlights.
"You should turn off your lights" natasha said with a smile and wanda did as she was told.
It was dark except for the soft candle light.
"Now i can barely see you" wanda pouted.
Natasha smiled.
"Dont pout. It makes me sad because i cant kiss it away"
Wanda stopped pouting.
"I think I found a solution for that" wanda said and natasha raised her eyebrow.
"I found out what went wrong in the first place and i think i can fix it."
"why me wanda? Why not your brother? Your parents? Vision?"
Wanda looked down at her lap, her eyes glitter with tears.
"Its been too long for them, there's only a short window of time where it can be preformed."
Natasha smiled sadly.
"I know there's a catch wanda. What will it cost?"
"Its nothing i cant handle"
Wanda whispered.
Natasha bit her lip.
"No"
Wanda's eyes widened.
"Nat-"
"No." The older woman repeated.
"So what? Do you want to stay like these forever and hurt the both of us in the process?" The pain was visible in wanda's eyes.
"Of course not wanda" natasha whispered while her eyes traveled wanda's face. Aching to touch it.
"Then what?" Wanda asked.
"I think you need to let me go."
"No."
"Wanda-" natasha tried her again but got cut off.
"I refuse to let you die" wanda said with anger.
"Im already dead wanda"
"You dont get it, do you? I love you! Let me save you. You said you're a selfish person natasha, than prove it and choose to stay"
Wanda's tears were smudging her makeup and natasha sigh in defense.
"I love you too"
"So stay" wanda begged.
Natasha smiled sadly at wanda before she pulled the basket to her lap and pulled out a small vanilla flavored cupcake wanda brought and took a bite of it.
"Theres something i wanna try. Close your eyes" she said and wanda looked at her confused.
"Just do it, ill be here when you'll open them again" natasha said before she took another bite.
Wanda did as she been told.
Before she could open her mouth to say anything she felt soft lips ghosting over hers and a hint of vanilla flavored cake.
The younger girl was taken back.
She could almost feel natasha's lips and if she tried hard enough she could almost feel her breath.
Almost.
When she opened her eyes she found Natasha taking another bite from the cake with a small sad smile tugged on her lips.
"That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty.. ..you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are." (-the catcher in the rye)
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hello-yue-here · 3 years
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About your atla ship songs, I have a couple of questions (sorry if my phrasing comes out wrong, english isn't my first language and I worry it might across as accidentally defensive): how did you end up with the choices for zukka, jetko and yuekka (note: I haven't seen the great comet, so feel free to obsess over it, I'm intrigued now and the hype is appreciated!)? Sidenote: I think the mailee choice is HILARIOUS and the tokka one just make me sad, I didn't expect to be attacked like this😭
kdjfha;s i love you im gonna obsess SO HARD over great comet now. you may regret this
this is gonna be so long so the rest is under the cut whoops
yuekka: no one else from great comet
where do i even begin. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN
okay so background information on this show: it's based off of a 76 oages excerpt from war and peace and its centered around a woman named natasha (and this guy pierre but he's irrelevant to this song so we wont worry about him) and natasha's bethrothed is off fighting in the war right now. she hasn't seen him in a while but she is in love with him.
every single lyrics of this song SCREAMS yuekka to me. the innocence and purity of their love. the love at first sight. and even the melancholy ending just- i go apeshit for this song. i love this song so much. and denee benton's voice??? kljsdhflwksugf please listen to this song if you haven't already. listen to the whole show. your life will be changed forever.
onto the lyrics (i stg this is ab to be the whole song whoops)
"the moon"
THOSE ARE THE FIRST WORDS ON THE SONG. natasha and andre (her bethrothed) met underneath the moonlight. Sokka and Yue first spoke to eachother at night and always met each other for their most intimate moments under the moonlight. also yue is LITERALLY the moon so like: right of the bat with those two words it's yuekka.
"and i saw your eyes / and i saw your smile / and the world opened wide"
sokka fell in love with yue the moment he saw her in the canal. she literally enchanted this motherfucker. everything about her made his heart go crazy. and 'the world opened wide' to me is from yue's perspective. Yue had never left the north pole and sokka had seen a good chuck of the world at the point. He took her on appa, he told her about his adventures. he saw the world yue wished to see and you know damn well that Sokka would have done anything to give it to her.
"oh the moon /oh the snow in the moonlight / and your childlike eyes and your distant smile / ill never be this happy again / you and i and no one else"
natasha sings fondly about the moon and the snow, seeing as it was where she fell in love with andre. yue and sokka LITERALLY fell in love in the same place: in the snowy nothern water tribe under the light of the moon. childlike eyes: THEYRE CHILDREN!!! distant smile: this is where it gets a little sad. theyre both children with way too many duties during a world that has known nothing but war for the past century. they want to be happy but yeah, theyre smiles are distant and far away because happiness seems out of reach for them most of the time. i'll never be this happy again: the moments yue and sokka shared together were probably the happiest either of them ever were. they were able to ignore the war and the world in the moments they shared together. and with no one else. no one else would be able to give each other this sense of peace and happiness and love.
"joy and life inside our souls / and no body knows just you and me / it's our secret"
Yue and Sokka had to sneak out in secret at night to go and see each other. Yue and Sokka couldn't be together for real because Yue was already engaged, but they were literally in love so she decided to see him anyways in secret. kasdjfhklasjd im losing my mind over them at this point.
"this winer sky / how can anyone sleep / there was never such a night before / i feel like putting my arms around my knees / and squeezing tight as possible / and flying away"
these are my FAVORITE lines in the entire song. yue and sokka had never felt this strongly about anyone before and that's why they are so drawn to each other. they had never experienced love before and they wanted to hold onto it for as long as they could even though they knew they couldnt. Sokka takes yue up on appa and she is wistful and wishes she could live like he does every day: ie flying away. oh my god these two deserved so much better. so much fucking better.
now for the saddes part. the saddest fucking part.
"maybe he'll come today / maybe he came already / and he's sitting in the drawing room / and i simply forgot"
natasha misses andre so intensely at this point. when i first listened to this show and heard this song i was like "wait a min... is andre like... dead?" and im sure i wasnt the only person who assumed that this was why natasha felt so sad by the end of such a beautiful song. (spoiler alert andre is fine)
but this line really exemplifies how sad natasha is, and hints at the fact that andre may never come back. it implies that their relationship is doomed (at least in my opinion) and that's all yuekka. Sokka misses yue intensely when shes gone. Yue accepted her fate almost immediately but sokka was in denial. he thought there had to be another way. but in the end it wasn't meant to be. and sokka will go on, loving yue, wishing for her back, even though it's not possible.
fuck im gonna cry.
zukka: all i've ever known- hadestown
"i was alone so long / i didn't even know that i was lonely / out in the cold so long / i didnt even know that i was cold"
sokka is from the swt so theres where the cold comes in. also in the gaang (initially) it was just him katara and aang. and katara and aang were much closer to each other than sokka was with aang and the two of them were benders so sokka was kind of an outsider with the two of them. He also represses a lot of his emotions and feels the need to do everything himself so i do see a lot of loneliness in sokka. and the fact that so many people in his life have left him (his mom, yue, his dad, suki briefly, etc...) he is known to keep people at an arms length. i see a lot of loneliness in sokka.
zuko's loneliness is a lot more obvious: he has literally been cast out and abandoned by everyone except iroh. and even then he still feels the need to be alone (remember zuko alone? thought so) these boys look after themselves and push others away and revel in their loneliness in order to keep themselves from getting hurt. at least in my opinion on canon and also some fanon because id be a liar if i said fanon didnt influence how i view ALL my ships (not just zukka)
"all ive ever known is how to hold my own / but now I wanna hold you too"
COME ONE MANNNN, they just wanna hold each other. theyre both very big protectors as well and kljhflkasdhg they wanna protect eachother like kljdhfl im gonna lose it rn.
"You take me in your arms / And suddenly there's sunlight all around me / Everything bright and warm / And shining like it never did before / And for a moment I forget / Just how dark and cold it gets"
SUNLIGHT SYMBOLISM. zuko is literally powered by the sun. i don't think i even NEED to elaborate on this one anymore lol. They find comfort in each other away from all of their trauma. when they're together nothing else matters and i personally love that for them. they both deserve love.
"I knew you before we met / And I don't even know you yet / All I know is your someone I have always known"
these two are extremely similar in canon. many parallels. older brothers overshadowed by their prodigy little sisters. longing to make their fathers proud (granted one dad is good and one is fuckin evil), both are pretty bad with emotions. both are seen protecting others before themselves (sokka protecting suki during the serpant's pass, sokka protecting toph on like multiple occassions, zuko protecting katara in the final agni kai), the list goes on. they know who the other is because they see themselves in the other person. they already know each other because they are each other (in a way, not entirely, but the similarities are strong in my opinion)
"I'm gonna hold you forever / The wind will never change on us / Long as we stay with each other / Then it will always be like this"
i just think this line is so cute and sweet (ignoring all the symbolism and foreshadowing that comes with the last line in the musical itself. im gonna pretend this is nothing but happy) and i think these boys deserve happiness so yeah. this song is zukka to me lol.
jetko: thrill of first love- falsettoes
if you've never listened to this song go an do it now. you will know INSTANTLY that it is jetko because of the dynamics alone. marvin and whizzer are pure jetko and i take no crticisms.
marvin and whizzer are both extremely stubborn, and they don't always get along, and they fight a lot, and they get mad at each other a lot, and they are both passionate as hell, and they will bring this passion into everything. they love each other that is without a doubt, but they arent perfect and they are once again stubborn and determined as fuck.
sound familiar? it's literally jetko.
the lyrics aren't what remind me of jetko, but the dynamic itself. the lyrics are too on the nose for a gay couple in 1970's america so that rlly cant apply to jetko all that much. but the way these two characters bounce off of each other and get annoyed with each other and argue with eachother reminds me of jetko. because let's be honest: these two are the most stubborn characters in the whole show. they will fight for what they believe and it will take literally everything to change their minds.
i love jetko but i think they would have petty arguments all the time and get aggravated by one another so easily. and this is even seen in canon: they work so fucking well together but they did not even HESITATE to fight one another after neither of them would give in and let the fight about whether jet was right or wrong about zuko being a firebender. like i cannot say it enough they are stubborn as fuck.
but underneath all that stubborn pettiness and bickering: marvin and whizzer still love each other. and jet and zuko would still love each other. because even though they are stubborn when it comes to arguments, they are even more stubborn and determined when it comes to each other. these two passionate motherfuckers are in love.
(now when i chose this song i decided to ignore the fact that this song literally spells out the fact that marvin and whizzer's relatinoship is doomed because they literally say passion dies. thats the difference between jetko and whizzer and marvin because i dont think passion dies. i chose this song strictly for the bickering lmao)
and i know you didnt ask about tokka but,,,,
i rlly wanna talk about the tokka one
so im going to
tokka: on my own- les mis
look. i KNOW this song is about unrequited love and i love tokka as a couple but,,, the unrequited love in this song just SCREAMS unrequited tokka to me so thats what i went with.
eponine is a girl who has neglectful parents who lives life by her own rules: toph. eponine is shown to be tough and confident and spunky to others but behind all of that she has emotions, she feels love, she hides her vulnerability so much: toph. she is in love with a guy she cant be with because he loves someone else: TOPH
eponine is toph to a t and toph is eponine to a t. this is not up for debate lmao
"without him i feel his arms around me"
toph is always seen grabbing onto someone (and its almost ALWAYS sokka) when she's somewhere where she can't use her feet to see. FEEL and ARMS cmon. look at it.
"and i know / i know that he is blind"
COME ON. IMAGINE TOPH SINGING THIS LINE. this line is already powerful enough in les mis but having toph, a blind character, sing it just makes the symbolism even deeper. toph sees the potential relationship they could have together. toph sees that sokka is oblivious to this. toph is not blind to the truth or the potention, but sokka is blind to her feelings. im about to lose my mind over this line.
"I love him / But every day I'm learning / All my life / I've only been pretending / Without me / His world will go on turning / A world that's full of happiness / That I have never known"
i need to sit down for a moment. toph grew up in a household where her parents did not understand her. she has learned to hide her true emotions and vulnerabilities from everyone. and its the fact that toph knows that she and sokka will never be together and the fact that she still loves him in spite of that is what makes this even more heartbreaking.
"but only on my own"
TOPH AND EPONINE SWEETIES I LOVE YOU
thank you for indulging my theatre kid nonsense. you are very sweet and kind and lovely and awesome and i hope you have a lovely day bestie :) <3
ask me why i think these songs go with these ships
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