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#stop trying to tell me im good. i can assure u its a problem and i want it to fucking stop. whats the point of being successful if u cant
opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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#other ppl: youll be fine! u r passionate abt what u do#no u dont understand. its not passion. im being consumed. im being devoured whole and alive.#its out of control and its killing me#stop trying to tell me im good. i can assure u its a problem and i want it to fucking stop. whats the point of being successful if u cant#even fucking breathe?#this has been my weekend in purgatory for some reason. but fuck u i got the fucking application 98% done so im gonna read it over tomorrow#when my brain doesnt feel like its gonna explode and thrn send it to the dude and idk see wtf he has to say about it bc im positive i#overwrote it bc im unhinged. whatever tomorrow im gonna spend another 4hr transfering algae#if i can. turns out ive given myself a headache and now i cannot sleep lmao#lol i wrote all that yesterday night. it appears i was having a bad time. and i continue to have a bad time bc my manuscript is 98% ready#for submission but i leave at 7.20 tomorrow morning for my flight and wont be home until 7pm in this time zone at the very least#which means ill have to fucking wait all day to submit i guess unless i use plane wifi or something. fucking idk#i also havent sent the application in yet and i havent bought any Christmas presents bc my brain is splitting into a million pieces#its 10 pm now. will is sleep tonight? who's to say i still have work to do on this fucking manuscript#at least my coauthor thinks itll only get sent back with minor revisions so it must look pretty ok#part of it is just me bitching abt inconsistent methods across papers bc it annoys me but also i dont give a fuck#i will fucking psychically control ppl to read this paper and use its knowledge bc the way they talk abt the topic annoys me so much#which is additionally annoying bc like i said i dont give a fuck#anyway im procrastinating#unrelated#my parents texting me today: yay we r excited to see u 🤗#and im just laying on the floor eminating a demonic aura
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arodabi · 3 years
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okay, i’m finally getting around to writing this, and uhh ill say its for aro week too. this is written as an aro person directed at alloromantic people. when i refer to writing, i’m kind of using it as a general term for creative works. Here’s me throwing my hat in on the question:
Can you ship aromantic characters?
and my answer is,,,,, actually a question. Why do you want to ship aromantic characters? 
I want alloros to realize that for a lot of aros, we do not get to see ourselves represented often. I can actually count on like one hand how many popular canon aro characters there are, and on the whole, none of their identities are respected. people constantly try to weasel their way out of actually writing aro characters, or they just ignore or deny their identity outright. fandom spaces (hell creative spaces in general) are at best not welcoming to aros, and at worst actively hostile towards us. So when the first question brought up when a character gets canonically confirmed as aro is “okay cool but can i ship them???” or “that’s nice but how can i still write about my fave ship that involves them??” i want to fucking scream. its a slap to the face and it shows that people really do not give a shit about aros. you say stuff like that and all i hear is “my fictional ship is so much more important than representing your marginalized minority identity” so instead of me just sitting here and saying “yes you can totally ship aro characters, as long as you’re respectful!!!” i’m saying “can you stop and think why you want to shove an aro character into a romantic relationship at the first chance you get?? maybe you have some arophobia you haven’t worked on?? maybe since we live in an amatonormative world, you’re letting that influence your views??” because that question being the first thing out of your mouth when you see a character you like confirmed as aro? that’s already disrespectful towards aros in my book.
So back to my question, Why do you want to ship aromantic characters? is it because you can’t write characters without them being in romantic relationships? or because you think a character without a romantic relationship is boring? Because if so, that’s a bad reason and it sounds like amatonormativity is rotting your brain. 
Is it because you just really like a ship with the aro character? Because you can write two characters with a strong relationship without writing them as a couple. A strong friendship can hold just as much power as a romantic relationship.
Is it because fuck aros, i will write what I wanna write and I don't wanna write this character with their canon identity? because then you’re just an arophobic asshole that needs to work on your shitty opinions. aro representation is just as important as any other lgbtqia+ representation.
Now if you’re reading this and thinking “well i heard aros can be in queerplatonic relationships!” I want you to think for a second. Are you writing a qpr or are you writing a romantic relationship with the serial numbers filed off? Have you talked to aro people or read stuff actually written by us? because, yes, some qprs can look a lot like a romantic relationship from the outside, but that’s just it, you’re looking at it from the outside. qprs are more than just “romantic relationship with extra steps”, and i think it’s really telling how many times i see alloromantic people saying they’re depicting an aro character in a qpr, not a romantic relationship, but then they never ever make any effort to distinguish the qpr from any other romantic relationship they write or draw. It just feels like qprs are getting used by alloros as a gatcha any time an aro person objects to how they depict (or don’t depict) aromanticism. if you want to write a character in a qpr then go for it! but you need to actually do research, talk to aros, get multiple opinions and not just take the first opinion that agrees with you and run with it.
“But what about headcanoning a character as arospec?” now i will say before i go into this, i am aro, not arospec, so if an arospec person wants to come in and correct me at any part here im happy to listen. but my problem when alloros bring up arospec identities is a very similar problem to how qprs are often depicted. I remember when Peridot Stevenuniverse got confirmed aro (she did, do not argue this with me) people were jumping over themselves to assure everyone that “a character getting confirmed as aro just means they are any arospec identity” which,, uhh,, not true? i mean if an arospec person wants to see a canon aro character as, say, aroflux, i’ve got no problem, aro and arospec people can do what they want really. but, i do have a problem with all the alloro fans who were spreading this. because, do you really see the character as demiromantic? or are you using that identity to deflect criticism from erasing aro identities? are you actually trying to write a good depiction of a demiro person? or are you just writing normal ship stuff and slapping a “uwu ive never felt romantic attraction until i met you! and now i will act exactly like any alloromantic person!” at the beginning? being in fandom spaces, i do see the occasional fic actually depicting an aspec identity (i say aspec her because aro is so rare that most of these examples i’ve seen have been acespec identities rather than arospec) but like 99% of the time, that’s written by someone who actually shares the identity. before you use our terms and identities to cover your ass when you erase us, consider not fucking doing that. consider listening to all aros and getting our thoughts and input. 
And last here is “but what about romance positive aros?” now i think most of what i’ve said previously can be applied here. the only thing i wanna add is, i think its very interesting that almost every time i see non aros depict aros, they always write them as very into romance, very open to be in romantic relationships, and very quiet about their aro identity. despite the character in canon not showing any of these traits. romance positive aros are good and important, but not every aro is romance positive. there’s quite a few of us that are romance repulsed, and alloros only depicting aros as super romance positive no matter what is suspicious to say the least. if an aro character is shown to be open to participating in romantic activities in canon then of course write them that way. but if an aro character is shown to be uninterested in, or even actively against romantic activities then respect that too.
so, to wrap up my thoughts in this ramble: please ask yourself why you want to ship aro characters so bad, because if the only reason is that amatonormativity has brainwashed you into not being able to write, or draw, or do anything with a character without them being in a romantic relationship, then you uhhh need to work on that, that’s honestly a writing/creative flaw imo. if you like the relationship dynamic between an aro character and another character, consider making them friends. friendship is not less powerful than romantic relationships. nobody is ever too old for the power of friendship trope. If you’re erasing an aro character’s identity because fuck aros, then fuck off somewhere far away from me and work on your bullshit. qprs, arospec identities, and romance positive aros are all very real, very important parts of the aro community, but please talk to other aros about them and actually make an effort to understand how these things work, dont just assume. And also don’t use these things as a way to erase aro identities and cover your ass if get called out. its disrespectful towards all aros.
The most important thing to do before writing or creating work with aro characters is to talk to aros, and not just the aros that agree with you. look up what a qpr actually is, learn how aros experience their arospec identities, talk to aros with multiple outlooks on romance. and if you can’t bring yourself to reach out, at least read through our own writings, whether that’s fiction, or informational posts, fuck, look through our memes if u wanna. Just please actually make an effort.
So, Can you ship aro characters? its complicated. look at trends in your fandom, question why you want to, and do research. Be an aro ally, listen to us. That’s really the most important thing.
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thisdreamplace · 3 years
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ashamed to say the 3D reflects our true inner reality, yes? my ENTIRE family has turned against me, after some atrocious conflicts in which they all ganged up on me nd judged me, name-calling, very hurtful things too, provoked me. i been dealing with some serious mental uh 'issues' on my own nd when this happend i was already on the verge of a breakdown nd the good news is while the conflict happened i kept telling myself theyre only reflecting me u can get thru it etc. Later i looked at the hard facts nd realised some of the hurtful things they said were my deep secret feelings abt myself. BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people? confronting one person vs whole family, why?! i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?
Part 2 is simply its been a week and theyve still been cold towards me as if I yelled AT THEM ABT THEIR PAINFUL 'tRuThS' in front of EVERYONE LMAOOO. At first if i was around we'd have dinner together while they'd all talk to each other like best friends aka sickeningly overly friendly while completely IGNORING me while i sat there. i could tolerate it. I WAS PISSED AT THEM TOO Now its too painful. They're having dinner without telling me, yesterday didnt leave enough food for me knowing i hadnt eaten, serve tea/snacks without my portion. i honestly feel so unspeakably trigered nd sad. worst is these things r reminding me of deep school memories when id feel excluded like this by other kids at parties or class activities nd its like im back there. anyway im glad i controled myself a bit nd didnt counter with horrid things abt them to THEM yet they think they can say the same to me. im so hurt rn i cant even tell u lol i was okay the whole week but now its too much,, ive been crying the whole day
thing is, ik this seems like 'im a victim oh noooo they ganged up on meee'. Nope its more like how do i change myself to change them?! u could say why not talk to them how they made u feel, except whenever ive defended myself in the past regarding hurtful things they/anyone in family did, the siblings/parents would say irritating things like: "oh so YOU'RE the one hurt? Oh thats right, its because YOU'RE right! yes, yes, you're always right. Forgive me for saying anything against the perfect person u are." Or one of them says: "You?! I hurt YOU? What about me? You don't care about me! So you think what ur doing is okay?" or "no, who do YOU think u are to tell ME what to do?" it just goes in circles like this! i dont deserve to hurt myself or do smth to myself even if they dont give a damn, even if years of silent suffering of the 'mEntAL pRoBlEms' (which my lovely parents have already told me is my fault years ago, hence why I NEVER show it to them, unless im crying too much then lol they just mock me, but idc abt THAT bcoz now ik i hav a right to let out my emotions)). i mean this is worse rjan usual. its kinda insane nd when guests come they start talking to me as if nothing's wrong then when they leave, they ignore me!
this whole twisted dynamics, feelijf left out nd helpless is ig some crazy assumptin from childhood of being alone nd unable to defend myself. plus when they argye with anyone, they become overly self-righteous nd over the years its clear they can only scream, blame the scapegoat and never talk abt serious matter like normal ppl. And yes, in the past when i bring this up, they like to reply with stuff like: "no YOU'RE the one who doesnt talk to US bla bla" like, when i do u just shut me down? have belittled my mental 'issues', mocked me when im at my worst, stabbed me with cruel silent treatments nd thinking its alright "bcoz of self-righteousness blegh". Or maybe i think its okay for them to punish me? or whatev? Like law says u get what u r. if these ~~~ keep doing this to me, im doubly ashamed to say this means im the one at fault?! i let this monster assunptin grow nd now idk what to do. the worst thing imo is how i failed to tell them,even if they ignored me in the past, how i feel when anything like this or a conflict happens nd none of them stand up for me, or at least are neutral to me. bcoz now if i do, they say nope, u dont care what we do, YOUR the shameless one :! so yeah they hav the advantage of 'numbwrs' while im too afraid to stand up for myself lol. btw they never apologize nd i suspect they expect ME to apologize to TYEM bcoz everything's already ruined bcoz of 'me'..... i give up on them, i really do, but my heart hurts. Either i harden my heart, nd save up to move out, OR i try to change my self or whatev assumptins i have. But how do i do that? i try afirming: "my familys so nice to me, im respected by them" but it feels so fake tears literally enter my eyes lol
firstly i want to say, thank you for coming here to vent and being open about your feelings. it’s so important sometimes to just let it all out, without holding back. so that way you can move forward more bravely, to create the life you truly want to experience. that being said, i am going to be completely honest with you here in hopes that perhaps it may inspire you and you will be ready to do what is needed for the life you truly want to experience.
“BUT my question is why the HELL cant they talk to me like normal people?” -> “i felt so small nd like an object, nd not a single person defended me. am i not a part of the family?” here is your question, and here is your answer. i think that being completely honest when venting your feelings can actually be so helpful, because if you read back what you have said, you will be able to clearly find the patterns that are creating your personal hell. FEELING IS THE SECRET. ASSUMPTIONS HARDEN INTO FACT. the true way you feel, becomes your experience. Feelings/assumptions/beliefs come first, and the experiences come second to confirm them. That’s all that’s happening here.
i am glad that you were able to keep your reactions to a minimum! that's wonderful and as many of us know, it can sometimes be hard to do in such hurtful circumstances. but you managed to do it, this shows just a small glimpse of the power you truly hold within. although emotionally you may feel out of control, there is still the choice to choose better for yourself which you demonstrated through your reaction to them. good for you!
the truth is, you acknowledge the victim mindset to seem like you’re not engulfed in it, but no, you’re still very clearly engulfed in it. as i have said before, you can’t be a VICTOR and feel bad about it. feeling bad about taking responsibility, about everyone is you pushed out, about any of these types of concepts automatically shows a victim mindset. talking to them won’t do anything, because there are no second causes. you could talk to them nicely, you could be the nicest person in the world. but you can’t pretend your way out of your inner world. your inner world is the one and only cause of your experiences. until you change the story you tell yourself, they will stay the same. this is a hard pill to swallow sometimes. and it can feel heavily, because it’s ultimately only you’re choice. they can’t change until you do. the heaviness of the situation may make it seem impossible to turn around, but that’s just an illusion. your emotional attachment to the situation makes it seem so real and hard to change, but no. that’s just an illusion too. however, it’s ultimately your choice. Do you want to take responsibility for your life, or do you want to keep being tossed around like your lost at sea, victim to the merciless angry waves? Because we always have a choice. No one chooses your inner world, you do. No one can go into your mind and decide things for you, that’s only your job.
you can harden your heart, but who would be the one who suffers more? It won’t be your family, i can assure you. it’ll only be you. by doing that, you keep that old story alive and therefore you keep experiencing it. you keep those stories alive that are desperately showing themselves to you, saying “LET US GO.” but you remain identified with those painful stories, so you grip onto them tight. you keep on thinking of possible reasons for their behavior, but you could just read your entire ask back to yourself and you’ll see every reason. your reactions, your beliefs about them, your emotional pain. its your refusal to let those things go, and focus on what you truly want that keeps you in this state and keeps them in this state. sure it’s painful to face the responsibility at first, but it’s not a blame game. thinking its about blame is just a misunderstanding of the teachings. it’s not about they’re so perfect and you’re so not, so you have to change your ways. it’s about this is how life works here. this is about... you can ONLY ever experience self. whatever is going on within, will be reflected in your outer world. it’s about how they can’t change, UNTIL YOU DO. so instead of feeling sorry for yourself, you have to decide to give yourself the gift of a wonderful life because you have that power too. you stop deciding they can be in control of your experience, and you decide your experience yourself.
to change your assumptions, stop trying to affirm over them and actually face what’s keeping you from believing in your desires. yeah, it’s going to be painful and uncomfortable. but you need to face the pain that you’re running away from, so that it can finally be released. you have to realize, it only stayed true because you believed it to be true. and if you are to live a life free from that story, and experience a more desirable story, then you must let the pain go. give yourself love and grace as you work through it, and know that there is a more beautiful side of life that awaits for you to accept it in.
No One To Change But Self
There is Nothing to Forgive
How to Sit with Your Triggers
give yourself the time you need, it's not race. the love that you wish to experience exists, allow it in. 💖
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harumiyabedo · 3 years
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how genshin impact characters would react to the traveler making matching bracelets ^ - ^
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heya! this is my first time making stories for genshin so i’m sorry if some of them are ooc and ahjdhahs my english is terrible so i hope u don’t mind and enjoy <3 [ also if there are some mistakes feel free to comment!! ] repost!!
ganyu, hu tao, venti, albedo
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ganyu
first of all let me just.. she’s very sweet. we all know how she overworks herself :(
traveler would collect qingxin flower just for the sake of qilin matching bracelets
paimon would also nag about how tiring it is to climb up these mountains to get them
the traveler would pretty much make the bracelets whenever she’s busy or far away from them
of course, SHE WILL MORE LIKELY FEEL SUS ABOUT THE TRAVELER..ok jk uhm yes i think she would be confused on why you’re staying away from her
PLS I CANT EVEN IMAGINE HOW SWEET SHE WOULD ASK THE TRAVELER “traveler, i don’t know how to say this but i’ve been meaning to talk to you, did i do something wrong?”
traveler would panik because of how they worried her on hiding something from her
“ah no! don’t worry ganyu we just had to collect some materials” paimon would help you out to reassure her that she did nothing wrong
“oh i thought i did something wrong, do you want me to help you out? since i’m on a break” she would hesitantly ask you
of course, you didn’t want her to feel sad and invited her to join you go watch the view near the mountains in mt. tianheng
while waiting for the sun to set itself you decided it’s time for her to know
“ganyu!! we want to show you something!” paimon’s loud voice echoes to her ears
paimon covers her eyes, trying her best to cover her sight, as you attach her bracelet in her wrists
“okay! i hope you like this~” paimon says
i could imagine some litol smol tears she’s holding, she never received these kinds of gifts from someone so it would be special
“i- didn’t expect you to make this for me traveler, it looks pretty.” smiling through her happy eyes “and yummy” out of nowhere she says that
you would laugh at how cute she’s stopping herself from eating the flowers, since it’s a ‘special’ gift from you.
hu tao
HELLO?! to one of the most energetic person we’ve known! hu tao hehe
actually it’s very tricky to make secret gifts for her!! since she would probably follow you and paimon withouth you knowing
so..you definitely hide from her very very far away after collecting some silk flowers, hoping ningguang doesn’t mind
after collecting some of the flowers both you and paimon travel again to mondstadt near windrise
“do you think she wouldn’t follow us here?” paimon asks curiously as she piles out the flowers you both collected
you shake your head reassuring paimon they wouldn’t know
it took a few hours for you to finish it nice and neatly and of course you needed some rest since it’s almost night time
the next day you and paimon would traveler back again in liyue to find hu tao
“HU TAOO!! WHERE ARE YOU” paimon screaming again loudly, her words echoing through wuwang hill
since she would probably stay there mostly, to bury or even scare some people
it would probably take you both a few minutes to find her just sitting near the cliff watching the view
“HU TAO!! THERE YOU ARE!” paimon calls out her name
“hehehe.. what brings you here traveler!” she asks curiously
actually at this point i know she would act confused but she definitely know about the activity you did with paimon
approaching her with a small gift box for her, with a neatly tied ribbon made out of vines to make it more nature ish? i guess
she would open it immediately and look at it for a few seconds before she realizes its a flower bracelet
wearing it immediately and showing out her wrist to let you know it looks good on her!
of course she doesn’t want you to be sad because she already knows about it and shows you how happy she is with the bracelet
you both would sit down together and wait for the sun to set with her ghost scaring the shit out of paimon
venti
another person we all love! collecting cecilia’s would be a little hard since venti would be performing their harp again with the winds
but not to worry! i can definitely assure they would be staying in windrise
let me just tell you how cecilias also look vv pretty.. just imagine how the wind breeze would flow through your hairs while collecting cecilias
“traveler! paimon! i didn’t expect you both to be in here~” venti calls out your attention
paimon: panik traveler: visible panik
“OH! we were just staying here for some wind” paimon says
“hmm i see, well you wouldn’t mind if i accompany you?”
you both nod without even hesitating
WELL THAT DIDNT WORK OUT BUT! you don’t give up and continue collecting them for a few days
connecting both stems of the flower itself, and the outcome a pretty cecilia bracelet!
now the problem is looking for venti
it would be confusing because they would be in windrise, stormterror’s lair and starsnatch cliff
so you decide to go to windrise and surprisingly there they are, using the harp performing again to the winds
“venti!! we have something to show you!” paimon excitedly calls out their name to inform them
“oya? what is it! come on come on i’m thrilled to know” they say
you tie the bracelet on their wrist showing them you have matching bracelets
“traveler.. this looks pretty!!” touching the petals
“but it could be nice if we tried making apple bracelets!”
well i’m expecting them to say that so 😋
in return they would perform some songs to help you all relax under the tree, watching the leaves dancing softly
paimon would also talk about how funny it is to make the flowers
“you could’ve told me so! i would just act like i don’t know anything” venti would make a joke out of it
it all ends up watching the skies together raising your arms to see the bracelets
in which you and paimon would doze off.
albedo
HELLO IM A SIMP FOR HIM HEHE but anywho, he has the same flower as venti but don’t worry it won’t be that difficult to collect since he would be staying in dragonspine again doing some experiments
“albedo! we’re gonna head out for a bit to get some food” you wave and bid goodbye to get some “food” but it’s actually the flowers
albedo would smile at the view and decide to take a rest and sketch out something
while sketching out, you and paimon still collecting the flowers would make them near the cliffs so that it wouldn’t be hard to make them
albedo sketches both you and paimon with klee bombing👹 the fishes and he would laugh at the picture he imagined
sir. i love u, ANYWAYS MOVING ON
on your way back to the lab is F R E E Z I NG so don’t worry you’ll definitely speedrun your way to the lab
panting your breaths and finally arriving at the lab
“paimon! traveler! i see that you both have arrived.. why are you both panting so hard.” he would suspiciously ask you both
“well if you didn’t have your lab here in a freezing mountain” angy paimon
“haha i’m sorry, come on i’ll help you out” and YOU DEFINITELY WOULD LOVE TO ACCEPT IT BCS WHY NOT 😍
settling yourself near the fire and wearing the coats tightly because of how cold it is
“where’s the food?” out of nowhere he asks
oh no.
panik again yes ofc we love that
“well we kinda uhh.. ATE IT AND FORGOT TO BUY SOME FOR YOU haha..” paimon jokes
albedo’s mind rn: hmm sus
you couldn’t take it anymore and show him the bracelets you made
“hEY! I THOUGH WE WERE SUPPOSED TO SURP-“ covering paimons mouth
smiling through the embarrassment, but that’s ok bcs he would gladly accept it and wear it himself
“this looks pretty traveler, when did you make it” he asks while investigating it the petals and stems curious on how you tied it perfectly
and you tell him how all of it went out
“well i didn’t know you would be so good at this, i’m gonna keep this and wear it while i’m here in the lab” he smiles and pats your head
SIR PLS DJNSDJBSH HEHE
he would also show you his sketch while waiting for you both.
“well we kinda uhh.. ATE IT AND FORGOT TO BUY SOME FOR YOU haha..” paimon jokes
albedo’s mind rn: hmm sus
you couldn’t take it anymore and show him the bracelets you made
“hEY! I THOUGH WE WERE SUPPOSED TO SURP-“ covering paimons mouth
smiling through the embarrassment, but that’s ok bcs he would gladly accept it and wear it himself
“this looks pretty traveler, when did you make it” he asks while investigating it the petals and stems curious on how you tied it perfectly
and you tell him how all of it went out
“well i didn’t know you would be so good at this, i’m gonna keep this and wear it while i’m here in the lab” he smiles and pats your head
SIR PLS DJNSDJBSH HEHE
he would also show you his sketch while waiting for you both.
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hello!! thank you for reaching here in the end! i don’t know if i did good or no but hopefully i did some ok i guess, i think most of them are ooc but thank you for reading <3
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mollydollydreams · 3 years
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Thinking about cnc today but like...in a soft way...not super violent, just...coercive. You're not gonna throw me down while I kick and scream, but you won't have to, because I'm so scared that you might do that or something else that I just do what you say. Then I thought of a scenario but it got somewhere between the two...
I just moved into my own place and you're a friendly older neighbour living across the street. I'm kind of small and not that strong, and you see me through the window struggling to set everything up by myself. After a long day I'm sweaty and tired and hop in the shower, washing myself off, but I totally forgot that I dont have curtains or blinds yet - you can see me stand there oblivious with my back to the window, water spilling over my butt, and you feel yourself get hard. You quickly turn your lights out and take out the zoom lens on your phone, and begin filming me massage the shower cream into various parts of my body. You think how soft I must feel, and begin to stroke yourself, imagining sliding your cock between my butt cheeks. I turn around, facing the window, and absent mindedly rub shower cream on my chest. I begin to touch my nipples a little. You wouldn't really be able to slide your cock between my tits, you think, they're too small. But that's not an issue for you and you keep jerking off as you see me slide one hand below my belly button.
Suddenly you see me make a shocked face as I duck out of the way of the window, then peek round the window frame to see if anyone is around. You laugh to yourself as I dont seem to have seen you, but you get a little frustrated that you didn't get to see more. You rewatch your recorded clip and wish you could have got more detail, so you find some videos of girls who look like me to finish yourself off.
You see me the next day carrying some large bags out of a taxi. I'm not doing a very good job at keeping hold of them, and something small and pink falls out of one. You decide now is a great moment to take a walk, and go outside. You see a light switch flicker on inside, confirming my location, and quickly snatch the item on the ground to put in your pocket. You walk quickly round the block then return home to take a closer look at your find.
Little pink panties, with a Hello Kitty motif and hearts printed all over, lacy edges and a bow in the middle. You feel your cock twitch again and inspect the fabric. You rub it between your fingers - it's soft and smooth, and you imagine what it must feel like covering my pussy. You're getting hard again. You pull and stretch at them, visualising the size of my hips and butt. You look out of the window, but by now I've put my curtains up and you cant see anything. You feel a little resentful - you want to have what you're craving. You put the panties down, put your phone down next to them playing the video of me in the shower, and jerk off hard and fast. You keep your cock pointed at my panties and imagine me in them, so that when you cum you shoot your load all over them, covering them in you.
You dont see much of me for a couple of days. Then you see a truck pull up outside my place - it's a furniture brand. A man gets out of the driver's seat and takes some large flat boxes out of the truck to place by my front door, and you see me open the door to let him in. I look tiny next to him and it's obvious I could never carry them inside by myself, so you see the man pick the boxes up again and take them inside. You take a look at my miniskirt and cami top. The delivery man leaves and you see him looking too. The truck leaves; you decide to be a good neighbour and come say hello. You want to see me more closely.
You knock and wait for me to answer. I open the door, looking a little confused, tucking my hair behind my ear. Already flustered - perfect, you think. You look down at me, realising you can see the outline of my nipples. You introduce yourself and explain that you live across the street, and that you just thought you'd say hi...but wasn't that truck from that furniture place? And dont you have to put those things together yourself? I half heartedly reply that yes it is, and I'm about to put it together so I should really go. You interrupt me to joke that that must be why I look so flustered and ask what it is, and I nervously reply that it's just some shelves. You say you can put that together for me in no time if I'd like. I look a little more nervous and make an excuse that I dont want you to go to any trouble, and begin to back away. You ask if I'm sure, and step forward. I begin to reply and close the door a little, and you know I'm not going to say yes, so you step right in and push the door back at me, stating you just cant leave that work to a young delicate lady such as myself.
I'm visibly stunned but smile a little and slowly close the door behind me. You ask where it all is and I carefully step past you to lead you to the correct room - as I do, you catch my strawberry and vanilla scent, and you watch my butt as you follow behind me. I gesture into a room and you look inside to see it's a bedroom. Not much is set up, but theres a large bed covered in plushies, a dresser covered in makeup and nail polishes, some of those bags of clothing earlier are spilling open with all kinds of skirts and lacy things falling out. Your bedroom, I ask, and I seem embarrassed as I nod.
"Nothing to be shy about," you say. "I'll help you out. Just think of me as your daddy."
As you're working on the shelves, im hovering by the door looking nervous the whole time. You maneuver yourself to "accidentally" knock a screwdriver over towards me and under a chair behind me, and ask if I could grab it for you. I think for a moment before crouching to get it, but it's gone a little too far under. You see me struggle to lean under the chair to pick it up while holding my skirt in place, but the screwdriver is too far and my skirt is too short. You catch a glimpse of two soft folds underneath heart print panties, before it disappears under my skirt again. I resurface looking a little red and come back to hand you the screwdriver - your fingers clasp mine as you take it and thank me. Nearly done, you assure me. At this point I'm more embarrassed about bending over in front of you than I am about leaving a grown man alone in my bedroom, and leave to wait in the lounge.
You finish the shelves in a few minutes, and hear me rustling through some things down the hall. You take a moment to open my drawers and see more character print panties, little pink bras, and cute socks. You bite your lip to collect yourself and call me into the room - I look relieved to see the shelves fully built. You ask me where I want them and push them against the wall where I pointed, easily lifting the furniture and pushing it into place. You turn around to see me smile and relax a little, and thank you for your help.
"Its no problem," you say, looking at me with the bed behind me. You look me up and down and think about pushing me backwards onto it. Casually, you step to the side a little, towards the door. I step closer to you, thinking you're leaving, but you stop and turn around again. "I hope we'll get on well as neighbours then?"
I'm a little surprised. "O-of course! Really appreciate the help!"
You take another step to the side, standing between me and the door, and I stop smiling. You casually close the door and turn back towards me. "Oh, I almost forgot." I take a step back.
I look nervous again, but smile a tiny bit. It's as if I'm trying to convince myself you still mean something innocent. "What is it?"
"Well," you start. You take your phone out of your pocket. "It's just...I thought you should know that I could see into your bathroom the other day."
You show me the video of my shower and my eyes widen. I step back and stutter a little.
"Now dont worry, theres no need to be scared," you say. "Its just you ought to be more careful. It can be dangerous and I'm just letting you know so you can take better care in future." My eyes dart around the room. "What if this got out?"
Now I look terrified and I'm shaking my head. I flinch and whimper as you firmly touch my face and grasp my jaw. "You dont want it to get out, right?"
"N-n-no..."
"Of course not," you say, slipping your phone back into what space is left in your pocket after you've gotten hard. "Now...I'll keep it safe for you. I told you I'd look out for you didn't I? And to think of me as your daddy." You keep hold of my jaw with one hand and begin to u buckle your belt with the other. My eyes well up a little and I stutter something again.
"Shhh it's okay. I'm just going to ask you a favour, since I did you a favour." Your cock is fighting your underwear for freedom and I whisper, "please no..."
You pat your pocket where your phone is. "Then I'll have to post this on the internet. Do you want that? I could find your family. I could send it to your parents." I'm whimpering quietly. "So you're going to do what I tell you then?"
I weakly nod. "What was that?" you ask.
"...Yes."
"Good girl." You let go of my jaw. The second you do, I try to dart under your arm and towards the door, but you step in front of me. I look up at you and you shake your head at me. "Keep your promises."
I step back and stand still, and you let your cock spring free. I look scared as you begin to stroke your length and look me up and down.
"Take off that top, wont you? I wanna see your cute little tits again."
I seem to have resigned myself to doing as you ask. Eyes downcast, I awkwardly pull at it, then pull it up and over my head. Your breathing gets heavier as you see my exposed nipples, and before I can do anything with my top, you hold your hand out expectantly. I'm confused for a moment so you gesture at what I'm holding, and I reluctantly hand you my cami. You sniff it before throwing it on the bed behind me.
"Now your panties."
I bend over as little as possible and shyly remove my panties, my hair falling into my face. You hold your hand out again and this time I already know what to do. You hold it to your face and breathe deeply, then lick the patch that was just touching my pussy. You begin to leak precum as you touch yourself. You look at me standing with my head lowered, bangs in my eyes, crossing my knees under my little plaid skirt, trying to hide my nipples with my hair and hands. You lift my chin to look at my face, and tell me, "Sit on the bed."
You step forward and I instinctively step back, falling backwards onto the bed. I clutch at my skirt to keep it from showing anything as you kneel down in front of me, between my ankles. I move backwards, as far as I can to get away from you, but reach the wall and my collection of teddybears and plushies. You laugh a little and keep slowly jerking yourself.
"Now spread those legs sweetie."
For a moment I dont move.
"Or do I have to push them?"
I slowly move my feet to the side, keeping my knees together, still holding my skirt down with one hand and covering my chest with the other. You smirk at my embarrassment and look expectantly until I move my knees apart too. I push my skirt down over my pussy.
"Now lift up your skirt. Let me see."
A tear rolls down my face as I slowly and reluctantly clutch at my skirt, lifting it just high enough for you to see my bald pussy. You let out a low growl.
"Keep your legs like that," you tell me, smirking and using your precum to lube your cock. "Now daddy needs you to take your hand off your tits and use both hands to hold onto your skirt."
I uncover my nipples and clutch the hem of my skirt, instinctively pulling it a little lower.
"Pull it higher again. Now hold onto it tight and let me take a look."
I hold tighter and you bring a hand between my legs. I whimper and flinch as you touch my lips, spreading a drop of wetness as you run your finger slowly up and down.
"Legs wider." I whimper again and try to force myself to obey, spreading my legs more. It's just enough that my lips part and you can see just how pink I am. You unintentionally buck your hips up and into your hand as you keep stroking your huge cock, and gently touch my pussy and clit with your other hand. You look at me, scared and shaking. You poke one finger inside and listen to me gasp as you slowly rub the inside of my pussy. My legs snap closer again but you stop stroking yourself and hold my knee in place.
"You're very wet there," you say, leaning a little closer. "Keep still." You put in another finger and I let out a tiny sound, somewhere between a whimper and a moan. Your cock twitches with excitement and you lean over me to lick my tits, wet lines from the bottom of my tiny breast up to the nipple and down again, then the same on the other side. You can hear and feel me quivering with fear. You sit back again to look at me.
"Dont be scared, sweetie. You're gonna love it."
You take both my wrists in one hand, pin them above my head, spread my pussy open with your other hand and begin to slide your cock up and down over my lips and clit. You move down and push the tip of your cock into me. You moan and growl at how tight and wet and warm I am, moving a tiny bit. You use both hands to spread my legs apart and push your way in further as I make more of my little noises. You begin to slide in and out, slowly, making sure I feel every inch of every thrust as fully as possible. You feel me get wetter and hotter around your cock. I begin to try to cover myself with my hands again so you lift my ankles onto your shoulders and hold both my wrists either side of my head, looking down at me as you fuck me. My little tits bounce and I cant move at all, as you fuck me a little faster, a little harder, a little faster again. My noises are getting a little loud so you clamp your hand over my mouth. "Shhhhh...this is your favour for me, remember?" You keep going and after a while move your hand to my butt, holding me in place as you pound into me. I turn my head to the side and you bring your hand back up to hold my jaw and make me look you in the eye.
"I'm gonna cum," you say. "I'm gonna cum so hard all inside you, you're gonna be full up of me."
I close my eyes and you kiss me forcefully, pushing your tongue into my mouth and onto mine. The force of your kiss keeps my head in place, your hands hold my wrists in place, and the force of your thrusts and the sheer weight of you leaves no room for me to move at all. I have no choice but to feel you growl and moan into my mouth as you tighten your grip on me and empty your load inside me, ramming up into my pussy and making sure I take it all.
As you calm, you look at me and smile again at my embarrassment. "Good girl," you say right into my ear. You sit back and stretch your neck a little, your cock still inside me. You pull out and watch your cum pour out of me and onto the back of my skirt.
"Good girl," you say again. You stand up and look at me as you put your boxers, jeans and belt back into place like nothing happened. You look at the shelves you built for me earlier, then back at me.
"Let me know if you need any more help," you say. You take your phone out of your pocket. "If not, I'll come back to check on you some time soon."
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dukeofonions · 3 years
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hi so i.found ur blog and its honestly like a breath of fresh air to look at so if its ok i might just fuckin,,vent here.
so. ik a lot of other people have been talking abt how pof was really straining to watch and i am.very late to the party but i need to talk abt it bcz holy fuck. when i first watched it i was in a way better place mwntally, also the general excitement of wow,content kinda overrode the headache and the eye hurty and the just. bad. but i was rewatching it recently because i was basing a fic off it and i just. i couldnt finish it because all of it was just so much and there was no fuckin warning?? so that was pog ig
next thing because i have. a lot of thoughts. ive been in the fandom for not-very-long, i joined in the middle of 2019 or something.and it just kinda sucks because im only still here for the fandom. i love the series but i can only watch dwit and compilations of logan/roman being sad so much before i can basically recite them off the top of my head. but i reallyreally love writing for the fandom!! it makes me so happy to do the writing, its just the fact that im not as invested with the series that makes me feel,,idk man guilty ig?? anyway thats too deep for a rant so im.a move on
god so tw me not liking post aa virgil and me talking abt toxic friends but hoooly fuck man. i just. pre aa virgil was fun because he was snarky and sarcastic and i could actually stand the nagst because his character made sense?? he was the 'bad guy' and he wasnt as woobified back then and he was honestly a solid vibe. but post aa virgil gives off the vibe of that one friend who fuckin, gets angry at you when you bring up any of your mental health issues and then blames their outburst on their mental health issuea and its like?? no i hate that character dynamic. people say bad things when the feel bad, sure, ik i have, but its the vibe of 'im gonna threaten you and then blame it on my mental health but if you so much as look at me wrong while ur having sensory overload or something i will smite you with the force of one thousand suns' and i am just.so tired. also ithink someone else said this but we should just call the series 'virgil sanders and the rest' because thats what it is now ksbdjqkbsq
also (all ofthese are my opinions btw and im not trying to say im rigbt im just tired honestly) the way. in pof the way patton's whole thing is 'you need empathy' is not funky fresh for both people with low empathy and high empathy 😎 bcz ppl with too much/too little empathy are always told theyre 'cold' or that theyre 'oversensitive', the whole 'there is an average amount of empathy and if u dont have that fuck you actually' is icky and bad and gross. i do think patton's character is really well done in the series but that episode jjust personally. ick.
and finally the moment uve not been waiting for bcz this is probably really tiring to read but the moment youve been waiting for-fwsa.just. why. its cute and stuff and i love nico. nico is a vibe. also bathroom man john is great. but shouldnt roman still be on shit terms with thomas?? like lk we're just gonna sweep away the whole 'i thought i wad ur hero' shizz? cool cool, glad to know romans arc still aint happening. also i get it, we needed to cement that virgil is a light side now. but like..did we?? actually bcz this is so long im gonna send in a second ask (im sososorry if this clogs up ur ask box if u tell me to stop i will i just. many thoughts) abt how even though i hate virgil, his arc should have been done. so differently. just gonna put like,, a mushroom emoji here so u can put the 2 asks together if u want 🍄
You’re always free to vent here! Sorry it took so long to respond but life has a cruel habit of getting in the way of things I need to do. 
So for starters, the POF problem should be talked about more so I can assure you that you’re not late to the party. It never really got the amount of attention it deserved so I am more than willing to bring that back up and trust me, you’re not alone. 
And again, you’re not alone in this either! Plenty of people still enjoy creating content for these characters. You don’t have to feel guilty for not finding the actual series interesting because honestly, I’m kinda losing interest too. But I still love these characters and I love that the fandom is still creating stories with them through different mediums.
Honestly I agree with just about everything you said about Virgil and I do eventually plan on tackling a lot of this in a future post. You know, if I ever force myself to just sit down and write the dang thing... 
Oh my gosh I’ve been waiting for someone to talk about this because that whole thing about empathy in POF really ticked me off because you’re absolutely right, not everyone is 100% empathetic, and some people can be empathetic to a point where it hurts themselves. Like I get what they were trying to say but it came across as, well, like you said. “If you’re don’t have this exact level of empathy then eff you I guess you’re a bad person.” Maybe that actually wasn’t their intention but it sure came across that way and maybe I’ll go into it a little more in another post because now that I’ve been reminded of it again I kinda wanna talk about it more. 
Okay yes, FWSA on its own is a good episode. Heck, it’s one of my favorites. It feels closer to a season one episode than ATHD that’s for sure. The problem with this episode isn’t the quality but the fact that it comes right after POF. And I’ve basically gone over this in my “Problem With Asides” post and how it affects both Roman and Virgil’s current arcs so I won’t go into much more detail here but just know that I pretty much agree with all of this. 
Also don’t worry about cluttering up my inbox. It’s here for people to share their thoughts and that’s exactly what you’re doing! Hope to see your part two soon mushroom anon! 
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snkpolls · 4 years
Text
SnK Chapter 133 Results
The chapter poll closed with 1456 responses. This month’s poll results brought to you by /u/berthototototo ,u/staraves, u/_Puppet_, @shifter-lines​ and @momtaku​
RATE THE CHAPTER 1,365 responses
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Nearly 80% of the fandom rated chapter 133 as good or great. In comparison with most SnK chapters, that’s on the low side. Since this was yet another set up chapter it’s possible that the fandom is waiting to see what payoff there will be before they throw their full support behind the developments introduced this month.
lmao good chapter but wtf
It's the best paced chapter since the rumbling began.
All I can say is I can't wait for the next chapter.
Great start to the end
There were a lot of contrived moments here on the first read but I'm hopeful things will play out in an unexpected way.
One of the better recent chapters, felt well paced and most of the dialogue and events seemed logical and fitting. Nice to see one more location added to the AOT world before the end.
I’ve been doing polls for almost 30 chapters now, this is the first where I have no chapter rating, I need to see how all this plays out before I decide if I love it or hate it.
All of this self-reflection is annoying. Though that feeling is just more because of the fact that waiting a whole month for another ‘these hands have killed’ chapter is not exciting when we are so close do the end and I just want to see the ending already.
Average as fuck, the intention is good but the execution is not it, and the dialogues feel very forced and repetitive.
Not good at connecting the narrative plot points 'cause there's...hundreds of them at this point but I'm here for the character interactions and to see just what the hell that "See you, Eren" from the beginning actually meant
Good but I worry about the pacing, some of this should have came earlier, will wait to see what comes from it.
  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT 1,379 responses
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Looks like a lot of people were glad to see that this conflict will not be resolved with a little heart-to-heart (34.9%). People also loved seeing child Eren being spooky with his new pal Ymir (18.8%). 11% liked seeing Eren’s friends reach out to him – or at least try.  9.4% liked Levi, because Levi. Connie, Jean, and Reiner sharing a moment of understanding warmed 8.6% of your hearts. 5.6% were happy to see Falco and Gabi brainstorming, and seeing Mr. Leonhart being a badass was the favorite moment for 3.6%.
I don’t know how it didn’t come up in this survey that Levi called Armin COMMANDER. That was my favorite moment by far. I also enjoyed the confirmation of Levi still caring about Eren. He always uses Zeke as a scapegoat. I somewhat feel bad for monke.
Isayama yeeting the Talk no Jutsu trope was my favorite moment!
I CAN"T BELIEVE THAT FLYING TITAN IS CANON LIKE HOLY SHIT
It was tough for me to decide a favorite moment from this chapter because every scene in this one was awesome. That's how fantastic of a chapter it was! I guess the only issue for me is the possibility of the Flying Titan actually becoming a reality when it felt too good to be true, but looking back, I think there was some foreshadowing to this becoming a reality.
God bless Isayama for the flying titan reveal
Favourite part was child Eren and Ymir standing in the paths.
Kiyomi being willing to die and sink with the ship actually hit me harder than I expected
Levi being the smollest husband is my favorite.
The gang forgiving RBA makes my heart weep with both melancholy and joy
  WHO WAS THIS CHAPTER’S MVP 1,363 responses
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Kiyomi and Eren are similar shades of green in this chart but I assure you it was Eren’s ranting about freedom (39.8%) and not Kiyomi’s talk of sacrifice and atonement (1%) that granted Eren this month’s MVP. Armin (18.9%), Mr. Leonhardt (9.5%), Falco (6.2%) and Levi (5.7%) are the other visible pieces of the pie.
#TEAMEREN
ANNIE IS THE BEST GIRL!
EREN IS A GENEROUS GOD
Falco is a good boy
Proud of armin for not backing out from commander role🤩
I love every time Eren shows up nowadays, other characters are getting a little worrying tho, Its starting to seem like alot of them have outlived their usefulness to the story and are just repeating stuff until their deaths.
Reiner handsome. That is all.
eren is just a cool badass
  WILL ONYANKOPON ACTUALLY MANAGE TO GET THE PLANE TO EREN WITHOUT ISSUE, OR WILL THE HALF-CAPACITY FUEL TANK BECOME A RELEVANT POINT? 1,363 responses
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Because Isayama has made clear that details as small as which direction Grisha is looking while leaving the house can’t go unquestioned in this manga, we asked about the fuel tank which is at half-capacity thanks to Floch, and whether or not it will present problems for those on board. A strong plurality, at 44.2% of you, think that they’ll run out of fuel, but it won’t be a massive hindrance. In second place, with almost exactly half of the votes as the first answer, 22.2% of you think Onyankopon will use the plan in some sort of suicidal attack, and just under 20% think the fuel tank will be a major roadblock in some other way. Lastly, ~14% of voters said they’ll make it just fine despite the damage. I admire your optimism.
I hope in vain that Onyankopon doesn't die. He won't even get to go to PATHS if he does.
  THE TALK WITH EREN FINALLY HAPPENED… SORT OF. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING DESCRIBE YOUR THOUGHTS? 1,371 responses
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Multiple select charts aren’t the prettiest but we like to think they do a good job of showcasing what the fandom thinks on a topic. While none of the options this month reached any sort of consensus, they do provide a snapshot of what we want and expect from Eren.  
Of the items offered, only “I’m glad Eren was firm and there will likely be no Talk no Jutsu” reached 50%. The other more popular choice were “I’m surprised Eren reached out to them instead of the other way around” (41%), “THAT PATHS STUFF IS STILL SO COOL” (38.8%) and “I’m glad so many were able to talk to him and it wasn’t just EMA” (33%).
The more negative options, ‘Eren was unnecessarily cruel, his friends deserve better”(13.8%), “I’m mad that Eren is letting them fight him. It’s like he wants to lose” (10.6% ) and “I don’t like Eren dismissing the possibility of talking” (8.1%) received only a fraction of support.
it looks like Eren is committed to HIS path, which backs his friends into a really tough corner. I can't say I'm surprised; we've seen it coming since they got to the ocean, we just didn't want to believe it.
Paths do be lit tho
I really wish Eren would stop the rumbling. He had done more than enough.
Eren's speech, didn't feel like him talking. It was way too typical, he used his catchphrases way too many times. This could be done on purpose for an in-story actual reason, but if it wasn't, i'm not a fan of it. The alliance talking about the colossal being able to defeat eren, makes me think armin won't be able to. I think Armin and Reiner still don't understand Eren's intentions, i fully think he does not want to be stopped. Eren is going to try to kill all of them.
I love Eren dialogues. I just loved the chapter and paths scene so much. Quality character development!!
Feel sad about Erens "catch me if you can" - I wish that the alliance will work together with Eren ....
Thank god for no talk no jutsu
he's been allowing them to use their titan powers, even against the Yeagerists who were supposed to defend their country. That means Eren doesn't dise with his friends, but doesn't side with his own supporters. Yeah, Eren's a dick.
  WHOSE WORDS TO EREN DID YOU ENJOY THE MOST? 1,366 responses
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The attempts at talking to Eren were almost a character rorschach test as each individual brought up what was closest to their hearts in an effort to stop the rumbling. While none of their pleas impacted Eren, we were curious which one the fandom enjoyed most. Levi’s promise of an ass kicking (32.5%) was the favorite, distantly followed by Mikasa’s more impassioned “Let us share your burdens” (24.9%).
Levi beeing sassy again - awsome
Mikasa saying she wants Eren to share his sins with her may be a hint for what's to come. I think she won't be able to let go of Eren and turn against the alliance to protect him.
Levi is hilarious
Honestly, the alliance have been so clueless that even Eren himself had to spare a moment for them, explicitly telling them that talking is never an option with Eren ‘I must always fight’ Yeager.
Look man, I'm an Eremika shipper and all but I really wish Mikasa didn't go on her usual "I'm here for you Eren" spiel in paths. It felt a little forced, and this would've been a good arc to have some more upfront and major changes as to how Mikasa sees Eren, but to get that usual "100% devotion" Mikasa that we've seen all series after we got signs that she's changed how she sees Eren was kind of disappointing.
I knew that the alliance talking to Eren won't work
Everyone is all sad while trying to convince Eren to stop the rumbling, and there's Levi cracking up jokes 😂 
  EREN PREEMPTIVELY TOLD THE ALLIANCE TO NOT NEGOTIATE WITH HIM AND TO ATTACK HIM WITH THE INTENT OF KILLING HIM. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? 1,357 responses
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It seems to be another month of Isayama dangling Eren’s motivations in front of us, though this time we got some substance in the form of some surprising words to the alliance. The most popular interpretation is the straightforward one (30.1%), that it’s as Eren says and he is genuine in not wanting to step on his friends’ freedom. Up next is people who support Reiner’s hypothesis of Eren wanting somebody to stop him (21.2%), with decreasingly popular choices being Eren wants to be killed only after the rumbling is complete (15.5%), he’s just continuing his daily “freedom” spiel (12.4%), and he’s confident in the alliance’s inability to stop him (11.6%). Many opted for the write in option to share their original theories (5.6%).
Seemed like a cry for help to me.
Im convinced that he wants to be stopped, he just doesn’t realize it yet.
Inconsistent character writing lol
Eren loves his friends, so much that he is unleashing the Rumbling, but he only cares about them on a physical level. He wants them to stay alive, no matter how they are mentally.
Eren is in the darkest part of his mind and wants to die. However, his obession with freedom is strong, so he keeps moving foward and won't allow his friends to just kill him without fight.
He wants the alliance to challenge fate, as he thinks the destruction of the world is inevitable
I believe that Eren does want to win but doesn’t want to live with the guilt, but I just felt this moment was too forced, and honestly a little bit cringe, just didn’t feel like something Eren would say
It wasn't Eren talking
No idea, not even sure it's really Eren talking
There are only a few possibilities that make sense: Reiner is right and he wants them to kill him, Ymir is controlling the PATHS and trying to imitate Eren but doesn't quite understand that his concept of freedom is hypocritical, OR Eren only sees restriction of freedom enforced through PATHS as being truly taking away their freedom, like he thinks it's alright to manipulate, gaslight, beat and imprison his friends using his own voice and hands, but using the Founder is somehow too far.
it’s all a part of his plan even tho the fandom hates it. Just wait for it guys ;)
Eren wants the world to see that the Eldians they hate are saving them from the rumbling
If allaiance kills eren then the world will respect eldians more
Zero Requiem
I don't like the Lelouch scenario, it is contrary to what Eren's character really is. I believe there is more to this because why say it now, when he could have said it before ? There has been many holes with what he's doing.
Lelouch ending
LELOUCH LELOUCH LELOUCH
It means he values freedom over safety... which makes him look like a hypocrite because a lot of times he had no problem taking their freedom from them lol
hes hypcritical asf, getting to decide who can be free or not when he that literally was bothered by that himself. I think it was very selfish
Eren has become crazy had this point and his reasoning doesn't make sense, he's trying to dodge reality
Eren is just trying to define, create, and justify his own version of “freedom” because he can’t let go of his childish way of looking at the world. Letting his friends have their “freedom” almost feels like a cheap necessity he had to toss into his homemade definition of freedom.
Eren is a fucking narcissist, a hypocrite.
Eren is dumb
Eren is just doing what he has to do.
Eren's cool as fuck
He's literally giving them the choice to do what they want. The freedom of will. It's up to them to decide if they want to stop him by force or not. At the end of the day, Eren is already firmly set on doing what's necessary for Paradis.
If they want to die trying to stop the rumbling, they are free to do so. But, he wants them to know that negotiating is useless
Reiner is wrong, Eren doesn't want to be stopped because the Cringevengers are trying to take away his freedom to destroy his enemies
  EREN IS DEPICTED AS A CHILD, AND WITH THE SAME SHADED EYES AS YMIR ONCE DID. WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING EXPLANATIONS DO YOU BELIEVE? 1,339 responses
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Child Eren appears again in this chapter, but now resembling Ymir even more. About half of the fandom thinks that the shaded out eyes is a sign of loss of free will. The other popular option, at 42.1% is that they’re depicted at the age they first got their titan powers. The idea that their eyes symbolize ignorance and that their child form symbolizes immaturity each got about 16%, and 10.5% of fans think Yams drew it this way just to look cool.
Alliance POV. They cannot understand Eren/Ymir, therefore their eyes (=windows to the soul) are obscured. Note that Ymir's eyes gradually got clearer from Eren's POV as he humanized her.
Carla died when Eren was still a child. He never healed from this traumatic experience, his child-self is still strongly suffering, that why he appeared as a child. I believe that the child next to Ymir is the darkest part of Eren's soul.
child self image is reflective of eren entering a state of naivety so as to bear the pain and gravity of the rumbling which he has caused  
I think it symbolizes a kinda immature concept of freedom
"Slaves don't need two eye balls". Eren is a slave to freedom.
shaded eyes represent being blinded by their desire for freedom & child-like state represents their innocence even if deemed to be something more
The are the ages of their greatest trauma
Adult Eren couldn't live with the guilt so he's letting child Eren carry the weight.
Both of them are doing everything for the sake of others, at the moment they aren't even thinking about themselves. EREN wants the people he loves and cares about to live a happy life and for that he is ready to sacrifice himself.
Bert had shaded eyes when talking to Armin too. I think it means the character is going to do questionable actions but in a mysterious manner. If that makes sense…
Bertold had the same shaded eyes when he was acting as the villain in rts. Same for Eren/Ymir here. Like Bertold, he is willing to kill his friends
Eren could have split his psyche similar to Reiner did with Marco. He is so distraught from his actions that he is using his child self's willpower to continue moving forward.
What about that parasite thing that attached to Ymir in the tree? What if that's the big bad of the series, and has taken over Eren?
The eyes are closed because they are tapped into the Yggdrasil network and are looking at what is happening in the real world through an inner eye.
  YMIR APPEARS TO BE ALIGNED WITH EREN. WHAT DO YOU MAKE OF THIS? 1,329 responses
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Ymir and Eren standing side by side was quite the sight to behold, but what does it mean? The large majority at 55.9% believe it indicates that they’re on the same side wanting the rumbling. 19.2% believe Eren to be a pawn to her now, 15.6% think it’s the other way around, and 9.3% think she’s on his side but is having doubts about her allegiance.
Corrupted by the Eren’s idea of freedom (Ymir’s freedom was taken from her); Child Eren is a prisoner of Adult Eren’s future actions.
Eren is taking Ymir's place as the lord of the Paths. Like Ymir, after he dies, he will live on in the Paths.
I low key think Eren is kinda being controlled by Ymir/ conflicting with her
Eren is now like Ymir, enslaved in Paths to something bigger
Ymir started controlling Eren when he was a child
Ymir and Eren are tied together now. One is definitely being influenced by the inner emotions of the other (possibly Ymir's years of resentment for her life since we saw Eren "sleeping" at the end of one of the previous chapters with the birds)
Eren as a child symbolises regression, immaturity and narrow-mindedness. Eren refuses to be an adult (aka making compromises, listening to others…) and enslaves himself to the simplistic ideology he had as a child. Ymir was a literal slave who never managed to emancipate herself despite her power. I think the parallel between the two is to make Eren's state of mind more explicit than it already was in 131.
EY is cute and canon
  EREN SAYS ALL THAT’S LEFT IS TO FIGHT. WHO IN THE APPROACHING BATTLE WOULD HE BE WILLING TO KILL? 1,333 responses
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Eren’s willingness to kill his own friends has been a topic of debate ever since the two sides separated, and this chapter pushed that question further. People seem to think Eren would hesitate the most with Mikasa and Armin, and hesitate the least with Pieck and Reiner, with the others falling into various middle positions, as the chart shows. The requisite to avoid Eren’s hit list seems to unsurprisingly be a pre-existing bond with him, with some leeway being given to children. Except for Gabi, it seems, but we all know how Eren fondly refers to her as “that brat”.
Eren has accepted that he will kill his friends, and wants to get it over with
Eren explicitly said "If someone tries to take my freedom, I won't hesitate to take theirs". That was in private to Zeke, so I don't doubt for a minute he will kill anyone in the Cringevengers he needs to in order to achieve it.
He is willing to kill them and I can't wait when some of the 104th will die already
Eren kill Armin already please
If Falco dies, I cries.
  IF NEITHER SIDE STEPS DOWN, EREN SAYS THEY’LL COLLIDE. WHO DO YOU THINK WILL WIN THE BATTLE? 1,349 responses
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The time to make your bets is here! As the long-awaited battle between the alliance and Eren approaches, the audience is almost evenly divided on what they think the outcome will be. If this poll counts for anything, the alliance are projected as the victors (50.6%), narrowly edging out (by only 15 votes) the believers in Eren as the winner (49.4%). Whether you attribute the neck-and-neck result to the unpredictability of the setup, or simply too many clearly incorrect people from the opposing side to yours, is up to you.
The alliance will win GG WP
The alliance have 1 skilled warrior , 2 skilled former SC soldiers , 5 Titan shifters and 2 Ackermans but I still thinking that they can't defeat Eren or Ymir .
th Eldian empire will win in the end and the outside world will get what it deserves...I hope
Eren naturally shouldn’t be able to be stopped. He’s way too powerful.
I appreciate the fact that Commander Armin definitely has no tangible plan and it was the SC part manifesting their death throes for a peaceful end. Still I can't help but cringe and not feel anything at their attempt.
don’t think it’s a win/lose situation between eren and alliance, both with win and lose in some way and there will be some 3rd option
I can't wait to see the alliance-Eren fight. I just can't wait
Isayama's writing with his asshole. Whoever side gets to win, we lose.
  LEVI RETURNED FROM PATHS WITH MORE FINGERS THAN HE STARTED WITH. IS THIS A MISTAKE? 1,342 responses
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We’ve seen Isayama make mistakes that the fandom took too far before, is this the case again? In an incredibly close vote, 51.5% think it is just a mistake, while the other half at 48.5% are convinced Isayama slipped in this plot development.
I've been saying this for years but Levi getting his fingers back from the Paths was definitely intentional and I'm sure the relationship between Ackermans and the Paths are going to be a major plot point. And after 132 I'm wondering if the 'afterlife' aspect will prove important too.
Is it just me or has Annie been going through a growth spurt lately? Either that or Isayama's artwork is getting sloppy. Not to even mention Levi's fingers…
This was quite a chapter. So many things that could happen especially with the flying titan. And then levi possibly having his fingers back. Then learning annie’s titan power. I heard aot will have a bad ending but i hope the the alliance will win.
Levi is being healed by the coordenate. Ackerman's blood is "half titan" so he must have recovered because of that just like titans do.
  WHICH COMMANDER HAD A BETTER TITAN DRAWING? 1,352 responses
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Can Armin live up to Erwin? While he’s asking himself that, the fandom has decided that in the drawing department he has not. Erwin’s (in?)famous turkey titan drawing ate up 61.2% of the votes compared to Armin’s drawing from this chapter at 38.8%.
none of this would have happened if my goat erwin was still alive
  IF EREN IS INDEED STOPPED BY SOMEONE, WHETHER IT BE KILLING HIM OR INHERITING HIS TITANS, WHO MAKES THE MOST SENSE FOR THIS ROLE? 1,349 responses
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The bets are on Mikasa being the one to stop Eren and/or inherit his burdens at 30.2%. Her words to Eren this chapter could definitely be foreboding in hindsight. Armin, leader of the uphill battle against Eren, is the runner-up at 26.5%. 18.6% think the answer is no one – presumably because Eren will either wipe ‘em all out, or be the one to decide his own fate. 13.5% think Reiner will be the one, he is the same as Eren after all. But everyone is the same nowadays, so who knows?
We then have Gabi (4.3%), Falco (2%), and Zeke, Jean, and Levi tied (1.5%). Annie follows with a tiny fraction (0.4%), and Pieck, the ultimate underdog, has the fewest votes at 2, or 0.1%.
...Hang on, aren’t we missing someone? Yes – even below Pieck, there is the underdog of underdogs: literally nobody thinks Connie will be the one to end it all. Will he ever be considered a real main character? :’(
I'm leaning towards Mikasa.
It feels like there was a lot of foreshadowing for Reiner to go head-to-head with Eren one final time.
Can't wait for Gabi to eat Eren.
  WILL LEVI KILL ZEKE? 1,322 responses
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It’s been over 4 years both in and out of world since Levi vowed to kill Zeke. Will he end up doing it after all this time? The majority of fans think he will, at 54.8%. 18.5% think he’ll die before completing his goal, and 14.2% think he’ll reassess the situation and his goal of killing Zeke.
Both will die fighting each other
He may kill him and realise it was pointless, both as revenge and to stop the rumbling. Or possibly he'll be prevented from using violence as a solution this time. No forgiveness though.
He will defeat him but die just after killing him
He will fulfill his promise to Erwin but he'll die soon after
I do think he will but I don't think it's about Erwin's promise anymore
He will prioritize stopping Eren over killing Zeke
Please don't kill monke. Let him redeem himself first. Monke to save the world!
He won't necessarily forgive Zeke, but he will take pity on his sad state of affairs, but more importantly realise stopping the rumbling is more important than his petty revenge.
I predict Levi will kill Zeke, but it will be some kind of suicidal attack that will get him killed in the process.
Zeke will die but not by Levi's hand
He'll be forced to team up with him to save the world. But won't forgive him.
Nah, characters never get what they want, plus I don't see a real fight between them, that would be repetitive and too predictable and Zeke is probably too distressed/depressed over what happened in paths. And that would be really boring if Levi killed him tbh.
No, Because Zeke is already dead
I can’t believe the Beast Titan could be any animal they wanted, including a T-Rex, and that boring jackass picked a monkey. As if he wasn’t enough of a loser.
HOW CORRECT ARE ARMIN AND LEVI IN THINKING THE RUMBLING CAN BE STOPPED BY KILLING ZEKE? 1,343 responses
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Levi suggests to the alliance that instead of ending Eren’s life to stop the rumbling, they could opt to kill the man previously called the key to the Founder, Zeke. Only 4.2% of people agree that this would help in stopping the rumbling, with the most popular response at 41.8% being it would fail due to Eren having full control of the Founder. The belief that Zeke’s death would have alternatively disastrous consequences is also popular, with 27.8% thinking Ymir’s presence would allow the titans’ advancement to continue, and 26.2% expecting the lack of command over the titans would render them mindless, but still functioning.
killing zeke probably won’t solve anything since the rumbling has already started, it might make a difference since eren isn’t royal but i think it’s just too late, and I really don’t want zeke to get killed
They'll find either that Zeke is already dead and was only needed alive for a moment to begin the rumbling, or that his continued existence is still necessary for defeating Eren somehow.
Everyone's talking about "stop Eren using Zeke," and here I am remembering "Zeke, stop Eren."
How is killing Zeke going to solve what Eren is doing? The poor guy just wanted to achieve his dream of eliminating all pp’s and instead he has to bear the burden of the destruction of the whole world.
Killing Zeke instead of Eren would be an emotional cop out for the Alliance. I hope that won't become the case, because that would make the ending of this manga super dissatisfying.
  WHICH WHOLESOME MOMENT BETWEEN COMRADES DID YOU LIKE THE MOST? 1,334 responses
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In such dire times, wholesome moments really are appreciated. 43.5% loves seeing Annie recall her 104th days the most, while 28.3% appreciated Connie accepting comfort from Reiner. The rest of you were split pretty closely between Gabi and Falco being adorbs together and Armin emulating Hange in his interactions with Onyankopon.
Annie's flashbacks of the Warriors I rly liked, Reiner smugly looking at Bertholdt was rly heartwarming...
It is very heart-warming how close the surviving members of the 104th still feel to each other after all said and done, including Eren.
the 104 got some understanding /closure for previous actions, so that's nice
Gabi and falco should have listened to Annie when she told them to take care of the charcoal, instead of ruining the chapter, and spewing some nonsense
WHICH OVERUSED PHRASE FROM THIS CHAPTER ARE YOU MOST TIRED OF? 1,315 responses
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Isayama sure is hammering home certain themes and character motivations; is it too much?  29.1% are tired of hearing everyone scream EREH, which is most often attributed to Mikasa, but it branched out this chapter to all his friends. 22.3% got bored of everyone being the same as each other; because when everyone’s the same, no one is. 19.5% are tired of every other word out of Eren’s mouth being freedom, 16.4% want Levi to get an original thought, and 12.7% want Eren to shut up about his other catchphrase and just stay put for one second.
Muh ereh
I LOVE YOU EREN KEEP MOVING FORWARD 4EVER
"The dialogue between Jean, Reiner, and Connie couldn’t have been worse. It felt like a bunch of stock phrases, “we’re the same”, “traitor”, etc.
Can't remember who said this and where but Eren does love his friends, it's just that he only cares about their physical well-being. ""You are free to do as I see fit.""
Ereh: Reiner, I am the same as you. I know that my enemies are the same but I have no choice because Society™
Rainah: No, you are wrong. I had a choice, but I attacked the walls because I was selfish and because I wanted to.
Ereh: Damn bro, same. Time to commit war crimes!
Man, each time I feel like the 104 can't be more annoying... I can't stand their whining about ereh, how they don't wan't to kill him and that ereh is just misguided, let's talk, please come back uwu.
The forced ""We're the same"" bullshit is really getting on my nerves. Reiner broke a wall with the goal of committing a genocide against innocent civilians. Jean and Connie killed a few soldiers with the goal of STOPPING a genocide against innocent civilians. No, these actions are not the same, and I'm sick of Isayama trying to make us think that they are. Now, I can forgive it because it seems like he's just going for a "Jean, Connie and Reiner all murdered former comrades and are racked with guilt because of it" comparison, which I'm fine with, but we're on thin ice here with the moral reductionism.
"We're the same". I'm sorry, are they suggesting the 104th and Warriors are ANYTHING alike? the 104th are victims of circumstance who were forced to make terrible choices. The Warriors willingly slaughtered hundreds of thousands. The Warriors are horrendous monsters beyond redemption, and it's insulting of Connie to say they're the same as those inhuman creatures.
even tho I liked that Connie and Jean acknowledge their similarities with the Warriors, they are still not the same, the Warriors were brainwashed coerced children when they started their crimes, the 104th were adults in high positions when they killed innocents and they enabled Eren to do the Rumbling by ignoring the signs, while RBA almost from the start fought to prevent the Rumbling.
The chapter's named Sinners, Isayama called feeding a person to a titan a sin right as chapter 84 came out, and EAMJC killing Bert still hasn't been addressed under these circumstances? They're saying they are the same as the warriors which isn't true in any capacity and I hope they fall on their ass soon to realise they are not at all the same.
Eren saying freedom all the time has been cringe since the EMA table confrontation.
  WHAT WILL FALCO’S FLYING TITAN BE USED FOR? 1,335 responses
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The most popular two options, at roughly a third each, are that Falco will come in clutch at the final battle, and that he’ll save them when the plane starts to falter.
Carrying the Eldian evacuees to safety but remember there are also Marleyans there. A titan saving Marleyans, by its own will, will all help for the final peace treaties  
Either taking Annie, Gabi, Yelena, and Kiyomi off the boat and picking up the Alliance in case the Flying Boat runs out of fuel at any point, or carrying the Eldians from Liberio to safety in case there are no airships left at Fort Salta to escort them.
What's the point of Annie going off if she's just going to join back a chapter later after more aruani flashbacks?
I DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE IN THAT
Eren is baiting him with that "scenery" because he needs to have the 9 titans to end the Ymir's curse
Fly gabi to the founding Titan to snipe eren
I get a feeling that he is the one who may inherit Eren's titans. What would be the point of giving him the titan powers, if he doesn't have any bigger role to play? Falco is somehow opposite to Eren, so if the power of the FT and AT are given to such pure boy like him, the future of the world might become brighter.
I thought the dialogue hinted more at Annie eating Falco's spinal fluid and gaining wings. Also I think it will be funny if Falco's memories are not from the previous Beast Titan but is actually the "Scenery" (it looks suspiciously similar)
Transporting Annie, Gabi and Falco where needed for the plot.
I wonder if Annie mentioning eating birds meant anything, or if it was just another poor attempt at humour by Isayama?
He'll transform thinking he can fly, find out he can't, the ship will sink and that's how Isayama will kill the characters on the ship
He'll fly far away on a different planet and start a new colony. Oh wait there is atmosphere. Whatever paths will lend him some cheat codes :P
  THE PLOT POINTS HINTED AT IN THIS CHAPTER HAVE SPARKED SOME BACKLASH. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT EACH ONE?
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So many revelations! The most controversial ones are Falco potentially becoming a flying titan, him getting Zeke’s memories, and the Female Titan powers; though more people are ok with each of these than not. Eren letting his friends continue to use titan powers, and the Beast Titan being multiple animals are the most accepted developments.
The idea of a flying titan is forceful and too convenient. I wonder how Isayama will draw it and not make it look like something odd.
The flying titan thing is the dumbest and most forced thing in snk I've seen. It feels like something from a fanfic and just seems so out of place. It's so sudden and forced. There are other things that seem really rushed in this chapter too. Like the bits about Annie's titan etc.
Lol at people calling anything about this “forced”. AoT fans pretend they’re a lot smarter than they actually are.
The stuff about Female titan and flying titans and memories being distributed was maybe a bit too conveniently delivered in the very end of the whole series, but tbh it's still plausible in-universe. I take it as a sign that Isayama knows what he wants and he wants to do the ending justice, not just get it out there as soon as possible with as little work as possible."
I'm glad the Falco can fly because it means the rest of the alliance can join the final battle and him flying was well built up. What I think should have been set up better is this power coming specifically from the Beast Titan. All past users we have seen of it was a monkey and we're just being told it could be other animals now?
some things (like zeke's beast memories, female titan abilities, flying titan, warrior families being alive) were so convenient, but I'm not too mad about it
Someone had thought about the beast titan animal theory before, since there was a giant horse at those old "paintings" that tell the story about eldia in marley's perspective, it is in chapter 87 i think, when grisha's parents are lecturing him.
The falco thing is too forced. The beast titan being any animal isn’t that forced but it should’ve been revealed waaay before, not in the same chapter as this whole falco flying thing.
I fully expected the Liberio Eldians to be alive, but was not expecting them to be en route to Fort Salta.
I don't like how plot convenient it is that the Eldian evacuees from Liberio are heading for Fort Salta just like Eren with his rumbling titans, the Alliance fighters on the flying boat, and now apparently the boat crew as well.
I always thought that suggested all the forms that titan could take. In retrospect it feels obvious -- Yams, you practically telegraphed that by naming the kid Falco in the first place.
What do you mean it's stupid that Galliard cured world hunger by creating bacon with his Titan form? His name is PORCO
since when could the Female Titan copy other powers? Did I just miss that? Because it just comes across as a convenient way to get Falco, Gabi, and Annie to the final battle.
annie will eat a boat and tranform into a boat titan AND KILL EREN WITH HER BOATNESS.
  WHICH TRAIN MOMENT DID YOU ENJOY THE MOST? 1,332 responses
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After being implied in 125, we get to see the Liberio evacuees on the run. As set up in that chapter, 44.8% were most happy to see Mr. Leonhart continuing to be a boss, while 33.6% were most hyped for another great double spread of the rumbling, as we’ve gotten for the last 4 chapters. Mr. Finger and the Brauns' concern for the children came in after that, followed by Karina and the Grices.
Papa Leonhart is a true badass. It wasn’t said if Bertolt’s mother was still alive, and the lack of Galliard parents/zeke’s grandparents was interesting- how the only warrior/cadet families shown were ones with a child that the readers know is still living.
Go Mr Leonhart we stan
I can’t believe karina is still alive
While having all the warriors' family (expect for the Yeagers) be there is forced and not natural, I'm really hoping that Falco gets to reunite with his parents.  He's so precious that he deserves that.  If the other parents die then so be it as long as I can have a Grice family reunion.
The approaching rumbling has pretty much lost its impact as a visual image because Isayama has overused it to death.
I liked the new character in the train
This chapter was a beautiful demonstration that ANNIE GOT ALL HER GUTS FROM MR. LEONHART THAT BADASS JUST REFUSED TO DIE AND FORCED THE MARLEYAN SOLDIERS TO GET TO THAT TRAIN WHAT A LEGEND
  WILL THE BLIMP BOMBERS BE EFFECTIVE AT ALL? 1,348 responses
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The chapter ended on the cliffhanger of the blimp bombers approaching Eren, but will it be worth the wait? The Majority, at about 75% think they will take out a few colossals but nothing to write home about, 19.7% think Eren will wipe them out without a second thought, and 5.6% think they will help deal a decisive blow.
I think The bombs on the plane , The colossal Titan nuke ability and the blimps won't do any kind of damage to Eren .
the blimps Will be destroyed by founding titan eren using his thorn on his spine
I'm itching to see eren finally take some sort of action against marley's bombers :D
I’m wondering if Isayama is going to flip the script a bit and showcase how the advancing technology is gaining the upper hand over titans, and cut Eren off in his tracks abruptly/make him change his tactic. Or, if it’ll just be the catalyst for the alliance to stop him after they witness it has no major affect on the titans.
I'm not sure about the direction of the final battle but everything's colliding at Fort Salta one way or another. I'm curious about this volume's cliffhanger."
  DESCRIBE THE CHAPTER IN ONE WORD 855 responses
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Continuing with the theme of underwhelming reception, the responses to this were, at least compared to others months’, very low in quantity and disparity between the top words. The 5 most chosen words for this chapter, quantity and average rating included, are:
Setup/Set-up [32 ; 3.91] Amazing [28 ; 4.79] Freedom [25 ; 4.20] Awesome [19 ; 4.84] Paths [19 ; 4.16]
Honorable mentions (because they all had the same or only one less amount of picks) include Ereh, Interesting, Great and Pain.
  WHAT CHAPTER DO YOU THINK THE MANGA WILL END AT? 1,337 responses
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Since Isayama’s self-appointed deadline of 2020 likely failed to stick, we’ve decided to revive this monthly question. The last time we asked, the majority of respondents chose 138 as the final chapter, which remains the most popular option now, though now losing a majority (39.5%), with 140+ (20.9%) and 139 (21.3%) hot on its tail. Perhaps it has something to do with the shared opinion that this chapter is one of setup, but it’s safe to say most of us are unconvinced this is ending anytime soon.
I think that the manga will end at chapter 138 or 139, and so 133 has to be the last "transition" chapter before the climax (end of volume 33/beginning of the last volume)
I think the story is going to end either at 138 or 139.
it will be over in a few months and both like Eren and Yams, we will finally be free.
I just hope Iseyama doesn’t rush to end this before the end of the year. 138 is the minimum
Idc at this point i just want it to end now it feels like it's stalling
I CANT WAIT FOR CHAPTERS 134+ TO COME OUT
im sad its ending :(
  WHAT ARE YOU MOST HOPING TO SEE NEXT CHAPTER? 1,366 responses
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Wow this was close!! We have a lot of hopes for next month’s volume closer. Of the options we presented, “The alliance finally taking action against Eren” (23.1%), “ZOOK WHERE ARE YOU” (22.1%) and “I’m always down for more Eren Jaeger” (20.9%) created a tight three way race. Historia’s return to the story was a distant fourth (12%).
I'm really curious about Zeke's whereabouts, I'm sure he will play another big role from now on
I’m just confused about Eren’s motivations and desires at this point.
Love the thought of a flying titan
levi better kill zeke next chapter!!!
Pls bring back historia
I just want to see Historia. Please I miss her lesbian greatness. Please I'm tired.
Next chapter is gonna be crazy
where is monke??
Isayama has something up his sleeves and I’m scared for the next chapter lol
Just let Levi kill Zeke already
Kiyomi backstory when?
One thought, the same as after every chapter, who's gonna bite the dust next ?
  WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING PLATFORMS DO YOU USE TO DISCUSS THE SERIES? 1,274 responses
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Reddit (41.3%) and Twitter (40.7%) remain the two most active platforms for fandom discussion, with Twitter stealthily creeping up on Reddit ever since we allowed multiple selections. Discord follows at (21.6%), with those lucky enough to talk about SnK in real life close behind (20.4%). Wherever you discuss the series we appreciate your support of the chapter poll! Even the Snapchatters.
  ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE CHAPTER? 365 responses
WOW, something something the japanese fans are not happy copypasta
The rumbing started some time ago and our heroes should get hungry in a little bit, will they be able to call pizza? Or something? Because it'd be very sad if they had to die without dinner :(
If Falco's cloud memories end up being child-Eren's view from last chapter, that would be incredible. So many characters will seemingly play an important role now that I have no idea what will happen next.
Reiner keeps thinking that the dialogue is about their guilt and since they are the same, then Eren wants to kill himself. But one of Eren's main statements is that he keeps moving forward despite everything (and he thinks Reiner is the same). I think Reiner's ""Eren wants us to fight him because he wants to die"" will be proven wrong, and he'll come to the correct conclusion in the end.
it's frustrating seeing eren continue the rumbling for the sake of his friends when it's not what his friends want
It's good but it could freak me out
it's honestly making me feel more hopeless...
Connie Reiner conversation was perfect to bring up his late best friend Bertholdt, but I guess they forget again and pretend they never killed him brutally, and he just got thanosed one day lmao
i'm really enjoying annie's development. she's went from one of my least cared about characters to one of my favourites just from her development with armin and reiner alone. really looking forward to how isayama will finish her arc.
Eren is gonna be defeated by the power of friendship and the power of the scarf he gave to boring Mikasa and also by two kids who should honestly be dead by now but somehow are still alive in this mess anyways boring chapter i don’t care what happen anymore I just want to this to end
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a Falco should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The Falco, of course, flies anyway because Yams don't care what nerds think is impossible.
I don't mind the "inconsistencies", because most of what people are complaining about is just nitpicking that doesn't have much of anything to do with the story being told. I just hope that we're done with setup and can finally get to the final battle next chapter.
Everybody in this chapter was admitting their sins, but Bert still wasn't mentioned when so far he's the biggest elephant in the room when it comes to Reiner / AMJC. They watched Armin devour Bert and felt nothing about it, they participated in a terrorist attack against Liberio and threw a party instead/didn't protest against it, but the moment they betrayed their countries and slaughtered their comrades, suddenly they're evil sinners. It really feels iffy as shit.
Eren should finish what he started, I actually support him, I do understand his anger, his past anger, and everything that has been done to the Paradis Island. The only way to stop the exterior world’s way they think about them, is killing them all (or nearly), otherwise it’s never going to stop. It would be too much of a childish way of actually allowing the alliance to stop him knowing that he’s really REALLY powerful.
I don't get why people are having so much backlash about Eren allowing the Alliance to kill him, it's not a goad of "come get me", it would be hypocritical of him to take away their powers to stop him when he preaches about freedom, because then he'd just want PERSONAL freedom when want he truly wants it freedom for everybody especially Eldians.
@ isayama as a yumihisu shipper stop the Ymir smelling Historia's hair gag it isn't funny :/
I just think Eren doesn't detour from his character cause he's persistent on continuing the rumbling, having his own definition of freedom while he also doesn't take away his friends' power to fight him. It's just kinda frustrating that Eren is so blinded by his concept of freedom and chose this path.
People who think Eren will complete the rumbling are in heavy denial.
I kinda hope that we get to see Hizuru at least once. I also believe that Mikasa deserves to know the truth about her Ackerman blood and that it does not make her a slave in any way. More than anything though I just wanna see her character done justice in this final arc so that people will finally quit complaining about her always being "Eren-obsessed." She is without a doubt one of the most misunderstood characters in the entire series.
I liked the Paths stuff. But I'm bored of the cringe 104th, Isayama please give back Bertholdt I wanna see him, Paths is the perfect opportunity T-T
I maintain that Eren allowing his friends to fight him and potentially die because FREEDOM is fucking weird and OOC because he had no problem taking their freedom away in 112. He lied to their faces (same chapter he stated that ignorance=slavery) and locked them in prison. He also couldn't stand losing anyone close to him for most of the manga (serumbowl, hiding info about Historia, etc.), even if it went against Paradis, and so far nothing states that he suddenly and consciously changed his mind on that. If there is no explanation for his sudden change in behavior then parts of his character just went down the drain for the sake of covering up a plothole (that could easily be resolved by just saying that the founder can't control the shifters......)
I read some theories of Hange come back as a Titan Shifter. The parallel of both Ackermans put their fist on Eren and Hange before they died. Eren came back to life again as Attack Titan after that. There are also similarities between Hange and Xavier, both do research on titans, wearing glasses and I wonder if we would find out who is this person that Zeke could trust, as Xavier mentioned. We've seen Hange almost died 3 times, during the battle with Bertholdt and Reiner revelation, the crystal underground with Kenny's team and Bertbomb. Hange managed to come back again and again. Maybe I'm just being hopeful here (crying again) but I respect if Isayama sensei really killed Hange for good. But but but.. T^T
I'm beyond sick of the alliance. If they win at this point Isayama has officially destroyed his own manga.
No Hanji = nothing to smile neither to hope for in this chapter. I hate Eren for not even reacting to her death.
Isayama's doing a terrible job with the Alliance. I have many reasons to want the rumbling to be stopped, but if I forget for one second that Armin's my fave charac., I need to ask WTH?? Characters say one thing while the narrative says another. Yo, every damn chapter they've been feeling guilty and shitty, yet their constant regretting says they're good people. The heroic sacrifices say they're good people. The refusing to bring the kid although the kid can fckin fly says they're good people. This is more complex than calling an oldman with a career built in genocide HERO then calling these lost as fuck teens SINNERS. Repetition won't make me buy it. Btw, I'm not taking proJeCtiNg five chapters from the end. I refuse to believe these characters are at the same. damn. mindspace as 10 chapters ago. Nah. Losing or winning, this finale should feel dignifying, not pathetic. I'm desperate here. :(
I'm tired of Eren and the alliance. My feelings are with Levi's promise, nothing else. What comes after that (if Levi is able to kill Zeke) it would be interesting (and amazing, I'm sure) conceptually, I will love to read it, but my heart is with our midget. He deserves to rest.
Also Levi...I get why he's still ""muh kill monke"", it makes sense with his character... But that doesn't mean it's not annoying.
I REALLY enjoyed this one
Can't believe that flying titan was a sort of joke since the Marley arc, but now it's a thing uh.
More evidence that freckled Ymir may be alive.
where bert
where IS ZEKE
Where Monke?
Ymir distorting the space and keeping Mikasa, Armin, Connie and Jean away from Eren makes me think she's controlling him.
YOU ARE FREE
There was so much information given to us this chapter. The reveal of the possibility of Falco flying and the possible death of Zeke.
There were some alright points to this chapter but for the most point, it seemed like so many things were forced, the most ridiculous points of this chapter for me were the warrior families living, and Falco deciding he can fly simply because he had a dream
This chapter (like all the others and the others to come) made me cry. 😔
This chapter made sense. Too much sense. All the plot points we’d been expecting like Falco being able to fly, Eren bringing the alliance into Paths to tell them they have to kill him if they want to stop the rumbling, and the folks from Liberio surviving, were all present. I think Isayama is about to throw some wild curveballs and ruin our whole careers
Something's wrong with Eren
Thanks Isym for ruining Armin and make him Annie's waifu
Nice, a little boring but also not disappointed
The alliance was so annoying this chapter. Reiner projecting his pathetic suicidal thoughts into Eren was just absolute cringe. Then Jean and Connie actually saying they’re the same as the guys who killed their friends and families just made me damn near bust a vein. Then Pieck was just being a passive aggressive bitch. I was hoping that at least the 104th would make it out alive but now I straight up want Eren to kill them all. They’re just flat out insufferable, incompetent traitors at this point.
Pieck passive aggressively roasting Armin felt good
Levi is sexy take the bandages off his face and let me see the scar
Levi's really fed up. he doesn't care anymore about eren he just wanted to kill zeke. But I do agree that by killing Zeke, maybe the rumbling will end.
People thinking that Eren became a slave are speedreaders
For me, the Rumbling represents Eren’s own death drive. He’s killing others and wants do die in the process or afterwards. And his talk to the alliance is what his "if you don't fight you don't win" ideology boils down to. Blind, narrow-minded kid!Eren doesn't really see any other outcome other than him completing the Rumbling (aka "winning") or getting killed by his friends before he can complete it. I (heavily) suspect Isayama is going for a third option though.
This arc has highlighted Eren's internal contradictions regarding freedom. We have him forcing his friends to fight, imprisoning them, beating them, gaslighting them about their own free will, but most of all forcing the rumbling onto them, which completely takes away their agency to choose their own fate. I would be disappointed if Isayama has dropped this consistent pattern of Eren contradicting his own ideals of freedom, just to rectify his mistake of making Eren too overpowered due to rule of cool (something I initially feared), so I'm hoping the true reason has to do with Ymir taking the reins and speaking for Eren.
Eren can't help what he wants and believes in and he can't stop his convictions to move foreword, but at the same time he recognises his friends own free will and different convictions and has decided that both sides will never be able to give up their own convinces or meet at a middle ground and has decided to just let things play out.
Eren is resigned to his fate to rumble the world, but he will not command his friends to do anything. He is willing to die by their hands.    
Eren prizes freedom above all else. If someone uses their freedom to try to kill him, he wouldn't mind
Eren isn't sure if he's right so he wants them to have the chance to stop him if they feel so strongly
Sooo due to the Warhammer nutcracker incident, does that mean Falco has a portion of the Warhammer, or something?
Spectacular chapter completely closing the possibility of dialogue between Eren and Aliance. It's good to see that Eren remains firm with his actions and hasn't changed his psychology of freedom out of the blue. Although many people think that Eren wants to die, I'm sure that he will fight against the Alliance to survive and carry out his plan to destroy humanity.
Still a Beruani shipper...and...OMF ANNIE IS THE 2ND SASHA SHE WANTS TO EAT GIVE MY BABY FOOD
Still feels like buildup ready for the final showdown already
Telling the story as if the alliance stands a chance, or has anything close to a complete picture of Eren, is still dumb
historia pov when
Honestly I think everything about Annie is forced and she never should have come back.
Hope Jean survives 💯
Hope will reveal historia's baby connection to the series
I believe in Isayama
I believe that Annie got the ability to harden by eating part of Reiner, I think by revealing her ability yams intends to lay foundation for Annie getting wings as well and joining falco in the sky fuck ya
I hope Annie's father dies in front of her
I hope any inconsistencies in Eren's character get clarified later.
I hope more is discussed about Historias child
I hope My beloved Eren kills levi and armin
I just can’t wait a pray that MAPPA don’t fail us💀
I don't know man why the fuck does a flying titan exist
AC130 INBOUND, wait, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT BIRD THING AND WHY DOES IT HAVE BOMBS IN ITS HANDS
Isayama is a hack
isayama never misses
isayama the goat, incredible as usual
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Text
Main 6 studying with MC (HCs)
asra
asra is... decent to study with
if you want to actually study that is
Because one pout, one pair of puppy dog eyes, and he's instantly calling for a break even though it's been five minutes since your last one
sure, he's determined to get serious for a really big exam, but if you try hard enough, he'll crack so so easily it would be sad to witness if you didn't love him so much. He literally can’t say no to that face of yours and you both know it
he's really good at teaching difficult concepts though - asra has a way with words that just makes you understand them well
in the event that he's the one that doesn't want to study, he does try to distract you for a bit with that mischievous asra smile and that intense gaze of his and him leaning just a bit closer than necessary but rest assured that if you put your foot down he'll stop and you two can get work done
just don't study too late or you'll find him sleeping when you look up from doing a particularly hard problem but it's adorable so its forgivable
nadia
nadia here is the best 
she's organised, she's got so many good study techniques, her notes are perfect and she knows exactly when you need a break so that the breaks aren't too frequent but enough so that you don't feel like ripping your hair out in frustration by the time you end a study block
if you do feel like ripping your hair out in frustration she's amazing at support and stress-relieving - would give you a nice, warm hug and tell you just how smart you are even if you don't realise it and how you're working so hard that it's commendable in itself, a massage slowly working it’s way in there
you might catch her staring at you a few times though so hopefully you can work under someone's gaze because that stuff is pressuring as hell and nadia's not flustered at all about being caught 
like asra, she can explain concepts super super well you might just replace your teacher for her honestly
And if you need an online resource that you gotta pay for, she’s got you covered 
julian
So julian tries to explain things to you but he just... fumbles. and, like. "you do it like this." "okayy but why" "why???? because... because that’s the way it works." "i still dont understand" "uh, um, i dont understand it myself y/n im sorry!!" "but. but you can do it????" "yeah but i dont understand how i understand"
his intentions are good though!
studyholic so it's probably you who has to call for breaks else he's staying up till 3am having studied 8 hours straight 
he is very watchful of breaks though; times them and gets back to work immediately when time's up
on one hand that's good! it means the study session isn't a waste of time and you get to work on creating some good study habits! 
on the other hand it's not! it means you might have finally gotten him to relax, lie down a bit with you, get him laughing off a sliver of that stress and then the cursed alarm sounds and he's yeeting himself out of your embrace and back into study mode!
please force him to rest he needs it
portia, muriel, and lucio under the cut!
portia
it all depends on balance
you two can get a lot of work done together whilst also having some good fun 
but you both have to be super careful that one more snack run isn't too many, one more five minute break isn't too much, and one more "want to hear what i heard today y/n??? This is the last time and then we can get back to studying i swear!" isn't going to lead into a full-blown gossip session
pepi is the best stress reliever just bask in her existence for a few minutes and all your worries are gone your skin is cleared your crops watered
portia can make a bunch of cute and funny lil memory clues for a lot of stuff though which is awesome but sometimes she reaches really hard and it doesn't make sense at all or it's just too silly that you would probably giggle during a test so you two just burst out laughing which disrupts the studious mood but it was time for a break anyway right??
Study sessions with her are overall a good mix of fun and actual work but when the test is the next day you two are probably just bouncing back pure panic and screaming
muriel 
a nice, calm, quiet study session. if you're working on your stuff and muriel's working on his and even though he's a bit stiff in the beginning he slowly relaxes throughout and even though he gets a bit flustered if he doesn't know the answer to a question you ask, it's all good. it's nice
but say you're the type to cause some mischief and whenever you do ask a question or he asks a question you brush your arms together, or when muriel's looking over your shoulder you lean back gently against him, or you smile at him too long 
he's super flustered. studying?? how can he when you're being so--so weird? so you??
muriel would grumble about how you're such a distraction and how he's not getting any work done so what's the point but he can't bring himself to kick you out because at the end of the day he doesnt really mind your company so he just flounders around you until you have mercy or it’s time to go home/leave
he acts like he doesn't want to study with you again but he doesn't refuse you when you suggest another study session so there’s that :D
lucio
for some strange, unknown reason you decide to study with lucio
sure, he's your boyfriend but he's still lucio and he is, hands down, the type to try everything to get you away from your studies
he probably thought you wanted to Study with him winkwink not actually study so hes super disappointed when he finds out
from being a major distraction to doing everything but studying to kisses that get longer and rougher every second, he's literally doing all he can to get you away from those textbooks
pouts when you ignore him in favour of work and whines about this being so unfair and how cruel you are and how you probably don't even need to study anyway and at least melchior and mercedes love him 
but there is one advantage of studying with him and it’s when you do have a break, he's great for cuddles and relaxation
...but the disadvantage is that he won't let you go when you decide it's time to get back to work so honestly those cancel each other out whoops
nevertheless, he’ll insist on studying with you more in the future and let’s be honest, you’ll accept even though you know just how unhelpful he is because, at the end of a very frustrating day, you still love him
-
thank u for reading! also just a heads up that i may be less active in posting content because school’s starting to overwhelm me (could use a study session with nadia ngl) but i will be online! because no matter how hard i try i always come back
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wygolvillage · 3 years
Text
been thinking about how i would make a remake/reimagining of simons quest. long post ahead. might be a little stupid since im no game designer or writer or anything lol
random gameplay stuff
it would be metroidvania style, but not all in the castle. imagine it like ooe but the map is interconnected.
i would keep the day/night cycle but it would be less obnoxious of course... probably there would be a little clock on the HUD showing what time it is and how close you are to nightfall. villagers would go inside during the night, but you can still enter churches. churches are your most reliable healing method since save rooms would be pretty sparse in the rest of the world map, and saving at the churches also allows you to skip straight to morning or nightfall if you so desire. being stuck in the middle of the woods during night can be disastrous if the player is ill-prepared since monsters grow stronger then.
there would still be puzzles to figure out and complete, and it would still be a bit cryptic (not to the degree of the original of course), but there is a supporting character i would put in who you can ask for hints at any time, and hers are a lot more straightforward (more on her later). important items are gained through quests rather than bought with hearts, but drop rates would be VERY forgiving since it’s required. like, a villager promises to give you the red crystal if you can get him some fish meat from a merman, which would have about a 40% drop rate... i kind of wanted to preserve the sense of fighting monsters to forage for materials the original has without making the game a total grindfest :P
additionally, materials dropped from monsters can be used to craft food items after simon teams up with the aforementioned supporting character. like i said before, save rooms wouldn’t be super common so it would be implemented as a way to heal yourself when you’re away from town.
the bosses would be decently difficult to compensate with there being very few of them- a true challenge, but they can be beaten with both playable characters if the player is skilled enough
the plot would be expanded upon as well so lemme give a little summary
it begins in simons house where he wakes up having trouble breathing. he’s been struggling with some physical illness ever since battling dracula years prior, especially a nasty bite on his arm he sustained during the fight, and that arm has been turning a pretty nasty shade of grey, like its wasting away. he goes outside to a graveyard near a local church to try and get some fresh air, but it is largely unhelpful. suddenly, he spots an old woman standing at one of the graves. he looks over at him and says mysteriously “ah... must be a horrible night for a curse.” simon is like “what do you mean?!” the old woman tells him to “resurrect him and destroy what remains, or nothing will remain of you”. she then disappears into thin air, implying she’s a ghost or something equally spooky. simon is like “destroy what remains... dracula’s remains?!”
the game starts properly in the graveyard and surrounding forest as simon heads in a fairly straight path towards the town of jova, where he meets a woman a few years younger than him named agnes. agnes’ parents were killed by dracula’s forces when he was resurrected back then, and she admires simon greatly for defeating the dark lord (shes also implied to be a descendant of grant danasty!). she decides to accompany him on his quest after hearing about his curse. he asks the head priest of the town if he knows about dracula’s remains, and the priest tells him that he heard of some of dracula’s followers placing some of dracula’s body parts in their strongholds to worship, and points him to the direction of the first stronghold and hands him a stake. he also warns them that bringing all of his remains together can resurrect the dark lord and it holds a remarkable corrupting power.
simon and agnes then become a character swapping duo (just like portrait of ruin hehehe). agnes is low on defense but can deal plenty of damage at a close range, and her signature weapon is the golden knife. she’s fast as well, whereas simon is more of a slow, defensive character who is best at keeping distance between himself and the enemy. agnes is smart, but impulsive and stubborn, and doesn’t like being told that she’s wrong. simon is a stoic but kind individual who tends to keep to himself. their personalities occasionally cause conflict between them during the adventure, but they eventually grow to become really good friends.
eventually they reach berkeley mansion, the first of the strongholds, and its aesthetic is very much “dark evil church”. there are the usual skeletons and bats and stuff, but some of the dracula followers are regular enemies as well. the first boss is a human who has dedicated his life to following dracula (specifically to contrast against the priest dude who gave simon the stake and directions) who uses magic attacks and stuff. beating him earns simon dracula’s rib, which functions suprisingly well as a shield (which becomes important later).
the adventure continues on like this, going from town to mansion to town, with simons curse becoming more and more hindering to him (from a story perspective not a gameplay one. simon wont become worse to play as because that would be lame as hell). they go to the other mansions, with the bosses being carmilla (guarding the nail of vlad, in a mansion thats very much a vampires lair), olrox (guarding the eyeball, in a massive dining hall themed mansion) death (guarding vlads ring in a Spooky Clockwork Skeleton Mansion with slogras and gaibons and all the usual death stuff), and in the final mansion... there is no boss. just as simon is about to grab the heart, agnes stops him.
Agnes: You told me you were going to destroy the remains, weren’t you?
Simon: Of... Of course, Agnes. Why do you ask?
Agnes: Why haven’t you?
Simon: ...
Agnes: We have almost all of them. You remember what the priest said, right? That bringing them together can resurrect Dracula.
Simon: Well... I haven’t exactly been truthful, Agnes. The old woman who sent me on this quest didn’t tell me just to destroy his remains...
Agnes: So you’ve been intending to resurrect the Dark Lord this whole time? For your own selfish gain?
Simon: This curse will kill me if I don’t.
Agnes: ...So it’s true, then. You’re willing to risk the lives of thousands just to save your own skin. Lives like my parents’... Lives like mine.
Simon: I...
Agnes: There’s no need to explain yourself, oh great hero, Simon Belmont. (Scoffs) If you care more for yourself than anyone else, strike me down now!
surprise! simon has to fight against his best friend! tbh i would be pissed at him too lmao. and it’s a tough fight, as agnes can deal a ton of damage and is hard to dodge. killing her like any other boss will give you the bad ending, where simon realizes she was right and lets himself succumb to the curse out of guilt for her death. the way to the good ending is to use dracula’s rib as a shield (i told you it would be important!) or dodge/survive her attacks until she tires out (the shield is the best method though), and realizes simon doesn’t want to hurt her. they have a touching emotional moment and simon assures her that he beat dracula before and can do it again, but he will need her help. agnes nods, and they head to the ruins of dracula’s old castle, which is totally empty. there’s no music, while the rest of the game has been filled with catchy tunes, here there’s only ambient noise.
they reach the throne room and place drac’s remains on a pedestal, where they begin to glow with dark energy. blood is dripping down the walls and stuff, and the count is returning to the mortal plane as thunder booms in the background. simon begins to doubt himself. if he loses now, the world will be plunged into darkness, and it will all be his fault. but... agnes has his back, despite everything. they fight dracula together, and though it’s tough with simon’s weakened body, they eventually prevail, as simon drives the stake into his heart, the curse finally lifted.
the game ends with agnes and simon returning to jova. agnes admits that she’s still upset with simon for lying to her, but she would be even more upset if he died slowly because of her. simon sighs, stating that there was no easy solution to the situation they were in, and asks for forgiveness for breaking her trust and risking so much for his own desires. agnes says maybe one day she will forgive him completely, and she still considers him a friend, but she needs some time to herself. simon nods, and they go their separate ways.
SO YEAH idk if this is even good but i hope u at least enjoyed reading it. maybe ill make designs for this version of simon, and for agnes too ofc :D
...yeah, not exactly the happiest ending, but i always found it kind of weird that simon was so willing to resurrect the count to save himself from the curse, so that’s the main conflict i decided to add to the story. its not the sort of conflict that can be easily resolved. theres no easy answer... agnes was right about simon risking other peoples lives being wrong, but she was also wrong to insist that he just give up and let the curse kill him instead. its Complicated idk... Castlevania II: Simon’s Trolley Problem
edit: actually i decided there would be two "true endings" after using the shield in the agnes fight. the one i described, and a second one where they decide against resurrecting dracula and simon lives out the short rest of his days with agnes until he dies of the curse. both endings are considered equally canon and valid
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lampd-intheface · 5 years
Text
vampire LAMP au
okay but like imagine a vampire au with polysanders except virgil is the only human???
roman got bitten by a vampire in italy just for kicks and then he was left to his own devices. he had to suffer through the shift alone with nobody to help him
for a little while, he was ravenous and accidentally killed a lot of people. in the end, tho, he snapped out of it and taught himself how to control his hunger
roman lived through the italian renaissance and moved between italy and spain (which is why he can speak really good spanish/italian) and even settled down a little in england for some time too
when roman settled down in england, he met patton who'd been a vampire for a while now
patton became a vampire becos he was hit with the plague and his mother was desperate to find a cure. this vampire they met ended up helping and then taking patton under his wing
roman and patton eventually find themselves in america (which was still a pretty new country at the time)
logan lived during the industrial era where everyone was just inventing things left and right and it was booming in terms of science and machinery
he was turned becos a vampire thought his genius was too valuable and death shouldn't put a stop to logan who had a lot of potential
the three then settled down in america
roman made some money writing fantasy books under pseudonyms. logan made money through patents or really any kind of intellectual work he could find. patton spent his time at home, just helping out and taking care of roman and logan
they had to move often, of course, becos people would be suspicious if they just stayed in the same place for too long. they couldn't get attached to people either becos getting attached to people meant people who would keep track of them
after all of their years being alive, patton and logan and roman have amassed enough money that they're just chilling and living comfortably
now, it's the modren era and, in this au, all of them either have online classes and/or night classes
virgil takes night classes and online classes because it limits his social interaction with other people and he's much more comfortable interacting with smaller groups of classmates (night classes)/not physically interacting with classmates at all (online classes)
the others because well duh they're vampires
it's not becos they dont like sunlight (they can be exposed to a little but too much gives them rashes). it's just that it's easier to keep a low profile if they interact with less people
logan is really the only one seriously taking classes and not for any other reason than because he loves learning. patton and roman will take classes here and there but only for their hobbies
insert virgil. i haven't thought this one through but logan probably meets him first because they share a class together.
anyway, LAMP have a meet cute or whatever
maybe like virgil is in an art history class and the prof says something wrong abt a certain part of history
logan is about to correct the prof but virgil beats him to it and logan is impressed with how accurate virgil was with his facts because logan lived that era and not a lot of people are so knowledgeable about it
that aside, their friendship takes time
logan has to introduce patton and roman separately and then the three of them have to keep attempting to get closer to virgil slowly and at virgil's pace
eventually, for their own reasons, they fall in love with virgil
logan falls in love with how much he relates to virgil. virgil is so smart and the two of them can talk and have debates and virgil just understands him so well
roman falls in love with how snarky virgil is becos he'll tease virgil and he knows virgil will serve it right back to him. virgil challenges him and its exhilarating and exciting
patton falls in love with how soft virgil is and how much he wants to protect virgil from all the bad things in the world. he loves how virgil has been through so much and yet virgil is still so strong
virgil is unaware of how smitten the three of them are tho and he falls in love with them too. he kind of just... plans to be with whoever asks him out first (if any of them ask him out at all)
because virgil struggles with his anxiety a lot, he can't really work at normal places. there's too many interactions, too many people.
he had thought that he'd eventually get used to it and then he'd be able go get a job but it's taking him a lot of time to get over his anxiety
precious time he can't really afford since he's putting himself through college
which is where his vamp boyfriends friends come in because hello, if they can't pay for their cute human crush's essential college classes, then what's the point of having all that money?
in any case, they find out abt virgil's financial problems and they're like omg... we're the solutions to his problem!!!
roman: i can finally actually slay what ails virgil!!!
logan: you won't be slaying anything--
roman: LET ME HAVE THIS ONE THING
before they establish that sort of relationship though, logan and roman and patton all agree that they want virgil to know the real them first so that virgil can decide whether or not he wants to be associated with them
the last thing they want to do is make virgil feel like he's obligated to stay with them even tho he fears them becos they're paying for his college and housing him and stuff
so, they plan get to know virgil more and then tell virgil they're kind of sort of creatures of the night
definitely easier said than done
when they tell virgil, he's like *phone error sound* ??? before realizing oh my God, they're serious
he then laughs about it a little and the other three are confused but he clarifies that the situation was very ironic
becos like omg, how hilarious is that??? the one goth guy who's super pale and avoids social contact and is practically the stereotypical vampire is actually the only one that's NOT a vampire??? that's irony at its finest
virgil then also assures them that the three of them being vampires doesn't bother him one bit
virgil, the epitome of tumblr humor: bold of you to assume i wouldn't f**k a supernatural being
jokes aside, he does reveal to them that he couldn't care less about what species they were, just that they loved him and he loved them
and damn did virgil love those three idiots
roman: woah there, you might pull a muscle from all the i love you's you're spouting
virgil, sweating up a storm after showing the most emotional vulnerability in his life: sh*t u rite
jokes aside, they do form a sort of weird relationship where the three of them happily provide for virgil because virgil doesnt have the means to do so
it takes virgil a while to really get used to it since he's not used to accepting things from other people without giving back
he struggles for a little while becos he keeps trying to find ways to repay them for what they do for him but there's only so much he can do
eventually they have a conversation abt it and they're like babe honey sweetie no
patton: you give us your love and that's the absolute most important and priceless thing in the world!!!
virgil, known pessimist who cringes away from romantic gestures out of habit: sounds fake but ok
but like eventually they work it out in like a slowly but surely kind of way.
virgil learns to see money the same way the other three do (replaceable and pretty much worthless to vampires who have a large abundance of it) and the other three learn to kind of tone it down on the expensive gifts
virgil: im so glad you guys dont buy me really expensive things now
roman, sweating profusely as he hides the golden apple he had commissioned to be made especially for virgil: oH YEAH OFC HAHAHA
(logan, when roman had suggested getting virgil the golden apple: first of all, no??? in what way is that even romantic--)
omg imagine if virgil does the thing where he coops himself up in his room??? and then someone tries to get him to get out by pulling the blinds open to let in light??? and virgil hisses???
patton, having just let sunlight in, looking absolutely offended: OKAY FIRST OF ALL, you're not a vampire so don't take that tone of hiss with me--
someone is like teasing or bullying virgil abt his aesthetic and virgil is obviously getting uncomfortable, esp when they call him twilight (in reference to the vampire romance novel)
so one of the boys, probably roman, steps up and he's like 'the person you should call twilight is me' and he scares the bullies by flashing his eyes red and showing them his fangs
omg!!! roman doesn't have a reflection so virgil helps him put on make up or smth!!!
maybe virgil in this au is an artist so he paints a picture of all three of them so they know what they look like becos they dont show up on pictures and reflections
patton, gazing down at the picture: this is what true love feels like
logan, also feeling the same way: really? how unpleasant
logan:
logan: give me more
omg also logan having only really kept up with the intellectual side of history so he doesn't know abt memes and like stuff like that so virgil teaches him and he has his Flashcards™
iDK MAN JUST VAMPIRE BOYS BEING SOFT FOR EACH OTHER AND FOR THIS SMALL LITTLE HUMAN THEYVE PULLED UNDER THEIR (bat) WINGS
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drabblesanddreams · 5 years
Note
hey, idk if you’re currently accepting requests but imma try anyway. can u do a scenario with chuuya and his fem!s/o where mori had assigned her to a mission that requires her to stay at the ADA for a while. most prolly bc a new mutual enemy showed up in yokohama. chuuya is agitated and scared bc his gf and dazai had a long history together and they havent had a closure yet and its clear that dazai still loves her. so chuuya would have to ask for assurance from his gf. make it extra angsty! 😂
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omg hi!! I loved writing this request so much so tysm for sending it in! Though im not sure its the kind of angst you were thinking of i hope you enjoy it regardless! Also super sorry for finishing it super late, hope yall enjoy!
My kofi link if you wish to support!
TW: just arguing tbh 
Word count: 1.5k
Summary: What happens when you are sent off to work beside a certain ex-mafia member who you share an unresolved history with but your currently with chuuya?
“Hat…check…gun…check…” you mutter to yourself as you recount each of the objects that you had packed for your latest mission. “So, what exactly am I missing, then?” you still feel like something was off however, like you forgot something important. You scrunch your eyebrows together in deep thought as you tried to pinpoint what exactly you were missing. You couldn’t afford to forget anything that might come of use, for this upcoming mission was of high importance.
A new group had recently arrived in Yokohama, threatening the dual existence of the ADA as well as the Port Mafia. This shared threat meant that both organizations had to work together, at least until the threat had been wiped out.
That was where you came in, you had a certain history with one of the members, a history that painted you in a good light which was exactly what the Port Mafia needed in order to establish a functioning alliance.
On the other hand, both you and Mori-san weren’t foolish enough to think that this history meant Dazai trusted you, per se. He was a complicated man with an even more complicated way of thinking who was smart enough to know that trusting someone was one of the most foolish things you could do.
But the fluttering feeling you felt in your stomach was a strong indication of just how nervous you were to be working alongside the handsome brunet once more. You knew how sly he could be with his words, how he could get deep under your skin and make you question things you were so sure about before. You wanted to bury your past in the deep end of your mind, to never resurface again and haunt you. Regardless, your fling with Dazai ended a long time ago and you were now with-
“Hey,” the sudden sound of another individuals voice breaks you out of your deep thought and you blink haphazardly. You straighten up from looking over your backpack to see Chuuya standing by the door, hand seemingly hesitantly placed on the frame, gripping it a little too tightly. He stares at you solemnly, a man just as caught in the spirals of his mind as you were.
“Hey,” your mouth curves into a smile, happy to see your boyfriend before you were due to head off, “What are you doing here?” Chuuya was required for a different part of this mission, and though you were confused to see him you wouldn’t say that you weren’t happy.
“Got you somethin’” You watch as he pulls a bouquet of red roses from behind his back. You smiled warmly at him before accepting the flowers and burying your face slightly in order to inhale their sweet scent.
“You didn’t have to,” you comment, though very much happy as you temporarily place the bouquet on your bed so that you can later place them in a vase. Every day without fail he presented you with a big, bouquet of red roses. The colour as rich and passionate as the foundations of your relationship with the ginger mafia member. It was sweet, really, and never failed to make your insides flutter with affection.
“But what are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to already be gone?” you question, turning around as he pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly and burying his face in your neck.
“What?” he snorts before planting soft kisses onto your neck, “I can’t see my beautiful girlfriend before she leaves me for another man?” you roll your eyes at his comment, moving back to slap his chest lightly, “Haha, very funny Chuuya.”
He returns to your neck and you’re distracted momentarily as he continues his previous actions. Light sucking, sensual kissing, tender licking, pleasure fills you as you flutter your eyes shut and loll your head back, letting him have even more access to your neck.
“Say it to me then,” he murmurs, and you hum, still too lost with how good his mouth feels on your neck and how his hand was gripping your hip.
“Say what,” you whisper back, and he stops his mission of decorating the skin of your neck with his loving kisses.
“That you don’t still love him,”
You huff, “Love who?” wishing he would just go back to making you feel good.
“Dazai.”
This catches your attention and you open your eyes, moving your head back to look at him in his eyes. Even now up close, the blue of his eyes is breathtaking to you, though they are now set hard with something you can’t quite identify.
Anger? Frustration? You have no idea what it is but its setting you off slightly.
The two of you never mentioned his name, not when it included the context of your previous relationship with said man. Later in the day, you would wish that you did, after all, maybe it wouldn’t have led to the conversation that the two of you were having now.
“What?” you ask, forehead creasing in a state of confusion.
“C’mon (Y/n), I think we both know what’s going to happen when you leave,” he states icily and you blink, shaking your head as you move backwards, sneering ever so slightly, “And exactly what’s going to happen?”
He rolls his ocean blue eyes at you and you cross your arms as you wait for his answer, “I seriously have to spell it out of you? It’s not cute playing dumb anymore doll,” your eyes narrow at his words.
“What the hell’s your problem?” you asked, confused and a tad hurt by his passive behaviour. You had no idea why he was acting like this; you watch monetarily as he strides further into the room and turns away from you. You have the faintest clue though, “Is this seriously over him? How many times are you going to keep bringing this up?!” you ask in indignation
His nostrils flare as he spins back around to face you, “Yes,” he confirms and you throw your hands up in frustration, “We both know that you’re still in love with the suicidal basted.” You wince at his words, you never thought that he would throw the fact right in your face. But his next words shamelessly cause your heart to skip a beat.
“And we both know he’s still in love with you.”
“Jesus fucking Christ Chuuya, unresolved history doesn’t mean that I’m still fucking in love with him!” you exclaim in pure frustration throwing your hands around as you turn away from him and sit back down to your bags on the ground.
“It does though!” he claims, jaw clenching as his voice raises to a shout, “You can honestly tell me that you feel absolutely nothing?” he snarls following you so that he can meet your scowling face. You almost want to shy away from his blazing fury. Chuuya has always been a hot-headed fool, but to take it on you over some insecurity…
“Well, what the fuck do you want me to do Chuuya?!?” you yell, throwing a piece of clothing at him as you stand back up, “What, do you want me to just quit the mission? Maybe move to another city so I never have to see him?” your eyes spark with fury as you continue, “O-or no, you know what? Why don’t I just move to another fucking planet huh?!” you scream.
“I knew I it, I knew you still had feelings,” he shouts back, knocking back his hat slightly so that he can run his hands through the orange strands. You shake your head in disbelief, “But I’m with you because I love you!” you cry out and he stares at you from underneath a heated gaze.
“You seriously have no trust in me? After everything?” you ask, as you stared at him in confusion. You didn’t understand how he could react to you in that way, how he could question everything the both of you went through.
A moment of silence finally overtakes the both of you and you stare at him, breathing heavily as you try to catch your breath.
His gaze darkens, his voice dropping to a low tone, “Yes.”
You flinch at that, eyes welling up pitifully as if he physically assaulted you. You try blinking it away to no avail and instead glare at him hatefully, letting the tears well up as the hot white-anger fill you to the core. All you want is to claw at him, to see him bleed and wail as pitifully as you feel right now.
The only sign betraying the resolute anger you felt was the quiver in your bottom lip. Your breath hitches as you slightly nod in resolution, “Get out,” you whisper.
He stays put, however, and instead fixes you with a hard glare.
“Get out!” You shout furiously, reaching for the bouquet of flowers on the bed and hurling them in his direction, the tears finally spilling down your face, “And take your stupid flowers with you!”
And he did. Leaving you behind with a broken heart and a hollow feeling that you haven’t felt in a long time.
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pokefanbri · 3 years
Text
I still have all our convos thru text & messanger, i didnt even realize til now or even existence of the still there photo we took together on our 1st date lookin like 2 hot messes lol. Ive done the math correctly this time lol & actually looking at the calendar its another stab to the chest...3 and a half months under the same roof, but almost 6 months together in full...im telling u, it wasn't enough time 😔😭 makes me wanna slit my own throat.😫What the actual fuck!!!🤢🤮
he said this to me earlier this yr 20 days after I moved in.
"To answer your post on Facebook Some change is not bad leaving your comfort zone to better your self is not change it's the right thing to do for your body your mind controls. I've left my comfort zone behind and making changes that impact all around me if you can't see the work I'm putting to make you a better person that your missing the point why we are together to better each other I won't stop trying to make you a better person because I feel some type of way I don't feel about anyone else"
Isn't that what we do everyday, to be better versions of ourselves. We most definitely have changed for the better over time this yr, small amounts at a time...u cannot rush these things or force change onto another.. Though it starts with you for your own betterment, You can't make someone else change or be better if they're a bit stubborn to change little things that may be upsetting, but you can surely help them through it. One has to step into the shoes of the other & realize something isn't right...but how do u help or approach someone struggling with a problem..& bring them out of the darkness, being there for them, a simple hug or cuddle, compromises, a safe space to talk things out...taking action to help them heal is all thats needed. As I reflect on everything we've said to eachother.. I know he cares about me or loves me too at the very least..even if he can't bring himself to ever admit, I know its within and has been apparent many times. He may think he's not good enough for me, or I for him due to my own issues...but everyone has them, it doesn't mean your weak. If one is in a state of weakness the other is there to help them up & assure them that their stronger than they give themselves credit for. And the purpose of going through things good or bad together, learning what to do & what not to do..its all a normal part of the experience..it brings you personal growth & even bring u closer as you go, work out your issuse & become stronger together. When u love someone, u love them with all their scars & wounds, broken or damaged..& would do anything to bring them comfort & pick them up when they're down. This is how I feel toward him. Though I wasnt given alot of support myself, being next to him & holding his hand was all the support I needed most the time, he was my rock as much as I was for him. I was too wrapped up in my own problems to notice he had any of his own..though he hid them well so I had no clue. If u want to be better do it for yourself & it would reflect on those around you. And when you're with someone, you do it together with strength & determination to see it though til u make it through. Im strong without him but still so weak without my rock to guide me. With him I was free but still stuck in my own poisonous prison, it wasn't meant to be his burden too, & his onto mine respectfully. He was stuck within his own walls just as much. We both didn't know how to come out of our individual depressed stinks, incapable of giving we needed, we weren't equipped with the right tools necessary to lift eachother & lost sight of what was important..we quit bettering ourselves & got worse..stuck under 1 roof without much to do..our own personal cell....and not doing anything to help the other, we didn't know how. If I knew then what I know now, it wouldn't have been that way 100%. After a few months there was less trust & eventually we both got scared of what we thought of the other til it got under our skin & I could sense him pulling away. All we needed was to be heard, cared for...and genuinely loved. We were the best of friends the whole way through nevertheless, but we lost eachother in the end, heartbreak hotel ever since. My heart has been putting back the pieces but still burns for his 2,000 miles away. I feel we didn't experience a whole lot..& the story was & still is far from over. I cant help but feel this way, I just can't stop it...its not easy at all to let go of him when he's the missing piece. Its so fucking hard when ur heart is tethered to someone elses. And it hurts so much that I wanna die. But I cant give up, cause if I did he may too. Im lost without him. But even if he's not here beside me, even if I need his warm embrace to tell me im safe from the storm, ill continue to better myself..for my own growth, & for him. I promise this
We lost the battle, but we didn't lose the war. Keep fighting my King of darkness with all your heart & your Queen of light will do the same. I hope to God one day we find eachother on the front lines when the dust settles
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Text
Big News
Summary: Sarah and Ava have big news for the groupchat.
WC: ~1.5k
[Other Bekker renamed the chat “HOUSE PARTY”]
Other Bekker: it’s official
Other Bekker: i own a house
Other Bekker: with my WIFE!!!!!!
Bekker: We’re throwing a housewarming party and everyone’s invited!
Dr. Lanik: What’s the dress code
Other Bekker: casual if you wear a suit ill kill you
Ethan Choi: When? 
Bekker: We were thinking it would start at around six or seven? It would mean a lot to us if Crockett could make it.
FreeWilly: Will there be alcohol?
Other Bekker: some of us are sober. No
no-ah: I’m in
Maggie<3: Wait who’s sober other than Crockett?
Dr. Lanik: Me
Other Bekker: me
connor: @OtherBekker there was an open bar at your wedding
Bekker: Circumstances change
Ethan Choi: This is such a fun conversation. Let’s not have it.
April: So back to the party… details!
Other Bekker: ill send the address in a bit but its gonna be potluck style. Everybody brings food. itll be pretty casual so dont be that asshole (@Dr.Lanik). starting at six ish and ending at maybe 10 or 11 depending on how tired we all are
Ethan Choi: Crockett’s program usually ends at like 5:30 so we might be a little late?
Other Bekker: ok sounds good. how is he btw
Ethan Choi: Pretty well. He’s outpatient for another few weeks and then his doctors are going to discuss long term options. Hopefully he’ll be back at work soon, too
April: Tell him we’re proud of him?
Ethan Choi: As soon as I pick him up tonight.
-
Sarah: are we telling them tonight?
Wifey: I was thinking so, yes. I mean, we have our house, and the paperwork went through.
Sarah: im so excited
Wifey: Me too, honey
-
Nat: Not to alarm anybody but whoever’s in charge of Connor right now, come to treatment 4
FreeWilly: love the implication that we take turns babysitting him
Dr. Lanik: We kind of do. I think it’s Maggie’s turn.
Maggie<3: I’m not at work. Who’s next in line?
April: @QueenElsa
Queen Elsa: Fine
connor: im a big boy i can take care of myself
Nat: You literally have a concussion
Ethan Choi: Why?
Nat: He fainted after a surgery. His sugar is low on the finger prick and he said he hasn’t had any water since his shift started
Dr. Lanik: @connor We’ve talked about this
connor: ok boomer
Dr. Lanik: @connor Stop calling me a boomer! We’re the same age!
connor: ok
connor: boomer
Bekker: Can you grow up @connor
connor: no
Queen Elsa: Update for everyone, Connor is getting a CT. He’s eating a Snickers bar right now and we’re pushing fluids
FreeWilly: youre not you when youre hungry
Dr. Lanik: @Bekker @OtherBekker What day will your housewarming party be? My daughter’s birthday is Friday.
Maggie<3: IM SORRY YOUR WHAT
Other Bekker: ?????
Bekker: We were thinking Saturday.
April: @FreeWilly Did you know about this???????
FreeWilly: uh yeah?
no-ah: Why did none of us know you had a daughter?
Dr. Lanik: I just don’t see how it’s any of your business.
Nat: How old is she? Who’s her mother? What school does she go to? How did we go this long without knowing?
[Dr. Lanik has sent an image to the chat]
Dr. Lanik: This is Emma, she’s almost eleven, and this is the most information any of you will ever be getting about her.
Ethan Choi: Well this has been a wild ride
Other Bekker: now taking bets on how crockett will react. $10 says he thinks its a joke
no-ah: Coward. He knows everything. $20 says he already knew.
Other Bekker: youre on
Queen Elsa: ...Anyways, Connor’s CT came back alright. It’s a minor concussion; he’ll be fine soon. 
Maggie<3: That’s good
Dr. Lanik: @FreeWilly and I will look after him.
Ethan Choi: Just picked up Crockett, he says hi. He also has letters for each of you as part of his process
Nat: That’s sweet
Ethan Choi: I have been assured none of them contain nudes
Other Bekker: thank g-d
Ethan Choi: I’ll be giving them to you all at work.
Ethan Choi: Crockett will be cooking something I won’t even try to pronounce for the housewarming party
Other Bekker: his cooking is all so good...
no-ah: It slaps
Queen Elsa: Is it that pasta thing??? With the crawfish????
Ethan Choi: Honestly, I don’t know.
Nat: Owen and I are bringing cookies.
Bekker: Important question, @Dr.Lanik… will Emma be coming?
Dr. Lanik: No. I don’t want her near any of you.
connor: hes got a point
Maggie<3: Have you never, in your life, had to bring her to a doctor?
Dr. Lanik: We use East Mercy so that you all keep your noses out of my life.
FreeWilly: ouch
April: I mean, if I had a daughter, I wouldn’t want any of you near her either.
Nat: Harsh, I trust you with my son
April: You’re different.
Bekker: Do I hear wedding bells?
Nat: @April What if we kissed in the doctor’s lounge… and we’re both girls?
Nat: Haha just kidding
Nat: Unless…?
April: Did you just hit on me with a meme
Nat: Did it work?
Other Bekker: another win for the gaydies
Other Bekker: THEY BOTH JUST WENT INTO THE DOCTORS LOUNGE JHGFKHFRH
Ethan Choi: Crockett laughed 
connor: do you read these messages to him?
Ethan Choi: Sometimes. He likes to be in the loop.
FreeWilly: hot take but. we could just add him back to the chat?
Ethan Choi: He’s not ready for that yet, but he does like to be updated on your lives and one-on-one texting is stressful for him
Other Bekker: we spend more time talking about crockett now than we did when he was in the chat
no-ah: Sweet I have my Crockett letter
Ethan Choi: I'll put them in your lockers. My shift is starting so I'm turning my phone to silent. 
Other Bekker: Crockett Time
Bekker: Did he write me one?
Other Bekker: @Bekker both mine and yours are in my locker i think. one is for "blonde bekker" and one is for "brunette bekker"
no-ah: That's what he has your contacts saved as 
Queen Elsa: Mine is just a smiley face sticker in an envelope?
Other Bekker: jsyk we should probably keep these private! this is important to him
Maggie<3: I'm so excited to see him again on Saturday, I've missed him.
FreeWilly: He's been busy. I think his program is like eight to five every day but Sunday
Nat: What's that even like?
Other Bekker: they have an in house aa group that meets a few times a day and theres a ton of other support like therapy to get to the root of the problem. i mean before he got sober the first time he was self medicating 
Other Bekker: he does a lot of art therapy i think. when he was inpatient he kept mailing paintings to my wife and i 
-
Curry (Not Dr.): Hey, it's Elsa Curry from Med. Sarah gave me your number. I was just wondering why you gave me a sticker?
Crockett: dont u put them on the inside of your binder? the one u put ur case notes in at the end of ur shift 
Curry (Not Dr.): How did you know that?
Crockett: u pull ur binder out when ur stressed to reference old cases. i thot u might like another sticker so u know ur not in this alone
Crockett: :)
-
[crickett has renamed the chat "dick bros"]
crickett: @connor do u wanna fuck again this weekend lmao
connor: ???
connor: i thought that was a one time thing
Ethan Choi: It doesn't have to be. 
-
Maggie<3: @Bekker @OtherBekker Sorry I'm running a little behind! I couldn't find my keys
Bekker: No harm, no foul!
[Bekker has sent an image to the chat]
Bekker: Definitely hurry, we're having so much fun!
-
Crockett: baby
HUBBY: I'm sitting right beside you.
Crockett: ik but im feeling kinda overwhelmed 
HUBBY: Do you want to go home?
Crockett: i think i just need air will you cover for me if someone comes looking
-
Other Bekker: THANK YOU @Maggie<3 FOR ACTUALLY HELPING CLEAN UP 
FreeWilly: sorry!
connor: sorry ahhhhhh i didnt think about it 
Nat: Congrats again, you two, this is huge!
April: ^^
no-ah: Will we get to meet her, or will she be a secret like Laniks daughter?
Bekker: You'll all definitely get to meet her, but let's not do so much at once? Adjusting to a new home is hard, and from what the adoption agency tells us, she's had a rough go of it.
no-ah: Of course! 
Queen Elsa: No little girl could have a better home! Congratulations on your daughter and I wish you really good luck. If you ever need help, we're all here!
Dr. Lanik: She's about eight, right?
Bekker: Yes
Dr. Lanik: If she needs help adjusting, let me know, and maybe Emma and I can help. She was about that age when I adopted her.
connor: the Lanik lore we are getting today omg
Dr. Lanik: You'll both be great parents, and @OtherBekker don't hesitate to let me know if you need extra time off. This is a big deal and you shouldn't have to stress about work when you should be worrying about your family. @Bekker I'll also ask Dr. Latham to be lenient with you as well.
Other Bekker: thank you from both of us <3
connor: who knew lanik had a heart. 
23 notes · View notes
sladedick · 5 years
Note
im just creepin on your twitter (as you do) and i wondering if u would ever write some rastim? bc 👀👀
yes!!!!! sorry this too k so long i love ra’stim owo
noncon/underage/switching/violence/black humor | on ao3
           Timothy Drake stares at his American school lunch in the fuzzy security camera. His dark circles are visible under his eyes even from this height, and his hair is visibly unwashed. Equations trail their way up pale arms in smudged ink. He shovels another soggy french fry into his mouth, scratching his armpit with the other hand.
           “Are you sure you want that one, Master?” Ra’s’s assistant inquires, standing meekly next to him as he watches the screen.
           “You dare question the will of the Demon?” Ra’s booms.
           “N-no, master, of course not,” he mutters, looking down. Ra’s turns his attention back to Timothy. He’s facedown in his applesauce, clearly snoring.
           “He’s perfect.”
Share the happy news with your detective
           “Happy engagement,” Ra’s says. Tim blinks at him.
           “To who?”
           “To you.”
           “I’m not engaged,” he says blankly.
           “I am pleased to inform you that you are. To me, the Demon’s Head.”
           “No,” Tim declares.
           “Yes.” Ra’s’s grin shows teeth.
           “No!”
           “This is not a discussion,” Ra’s says. “It is the respectful thing to do before I deflower you, Detective.”
           Tim makes a disgusted face. “You won’t be ‘deflowering’ me. I had sex with Superboy.” It had been an ordeal. Kon’s Kryptonian dick had gained semi-sentience and tried to lay its eggs in Tim. Turns out Clark hadn’t bothered to give him ‘the talk’.
           Ra’s’s lip curls. “How inappropriate.”
           “No premarital sex, huh, but rape is a-okay,” Tim mocks.
           “Victor’s rights, Timothy.”
           “That’s bullshit,” Tim says. Ra’s wags a finger in his face.
           “Language, Detective.”
           Tim sticks his tongue out. “You can’t marry minors without parental consent. Your marriage is null and void. Ra’s! Ra’s, listen to me, we have to be in Alabama—”
Keep excessive amounts of alcohol away from your detective
           The reception is ostentatious, of course.
           Ra’s first notices the problem when Tim’s step is slightly halting at the reception, cheeks slightly redder—always red, really, given how pale his skin is even for a European. They’re even red through the several layers of makeup that Ra’s had his servants apply.
           Tim gives a lopsided grin, showing off teeth that, until recently, had had braces on them. That’s the second sign something is off. Timothy has been pouting ever since he was kidnapped.
           “I want — some more campaign,” he says, quite sincerely. A face, as if he knows that’s not quite right. “Clam pain.” A pause. “Sham veins?”
           “Champaign, dear,” Ra’s says softly. Timothy grabs another glass from a passing server before Ra’s can stop it. The reception is ostentatious, and Timothy’s dress is no exception, in lacy whites and pale greens, showing off his body just enough to tell everyone what Ra’s has that they don’t. And how they should be jealous of Ra’s’s high school concubine.
           “It’s poor taste to be drunk at your own reception,” Ra’s says.
           “Your … fault,” Tim says. He sways slightly. Ra’s catches his arm. “Kidnapped me. Miss my family.”
           “You’ll make a new one quite soon.”
           “Fuck you. Hate you,” he mumbles. “Don’t wanna get pregnanant. Pregant. Prenengant.”
           Ra’s snatches the glass of champagne from Timothy’s hand as the boy slumps slightly against him.
           “I insist,” he says coldly, angrily, “that you be conscious for the consummation.”
           He takes some pleasure in seeing Timothy’s skin lose its redness for the first time that night, falling away to reveal a pale face. Timothy grabs desperately for the alcohol, but Ra’s whisks it away just in time.
           “Absolutely not.”
             2. Keep your detective well entertained
           “You can’t all be monks,” Tim tries to explain. The ninja sat in a circle around him squint at him through the eyeholes in their masks, heavy armor clinking as they shift. Tim repeats it in Arabic for the two that don’t speak English, and then switches to it for good.
           “I wish to be of the shadow subclass,” Ninja No. 3 says.
           “As do I,” adds Ninja No. 1.
           “The point of Dungeons and Dragons is to be something you’re not. It’s escapism.” The four guards, practically brainwashed into the service of Ra’s al Ghul, stare at him. “Nobody is allowed to be a ninja monk.”
           “I will be a warlock,” says Ninja No. 2, waving about the bit of paper that Tim had given him, translated from what Tim remembers of the Player’s Guide. “In service of the great Head of the Demon—”
           “This is a fantastical universe. Ra’s doesn’t exist. See? Escapism!” Tim sighs. “If you don’t cooperate I’m going to tell him you were very inadequate and suggest severe punishment.” He stares sternly.
           The ninja pale. Tim wouldn’t do that, really, because then they would end up dead. He knows exactly how much influence he has with Ra’s. The threat, however, is still good.
           “I will be a fighter,” sighs Ninja No. 2. “In the service of nobody.”
           “Perfect!” Tim grins. He feels like he should patronizingly pat their heads, but refrains. That’s the kind of thing they might only accept from Ra’s.
           “I will be a sorcerer,” says Ninja No. 4, “who works for only himself, and wields fantastic power.”
           Tim nods enthusiastically.
           “I will be a rogue,” says Ninja No. 1, “who overthrows his glorious leader and takes his place, murdering his kin and raping his wife—”
           “Wait just a second—”
           “—and sending all his castles and being to endless ruin, in search of individuality.”
           “I mean,” Tim says, “I’ll allow it …”
           (Ninja No. 1 doesn’t show up the next week. Neither do any of the others. It wasn’t your fault, Ra’s assures him, though please do not encourage individuality, Timothy.)
             3. Be assured your detective is sexually satisfied and interested
           Tim sits on one side of the wooden table, idly tracing the patterned texture with one
finger. Ra’s sits stiff and regal as always, a few slips of paper right in front of him. This is obviously a Meeting. Ra’s is always around Tim, but a Meeting is different. Ra’s has something to talk about, and Tim probably doesn’t want to hear it.
             “Beloved,” Ra’s says.
             “Ra’s,” Tim replies. His voice is considerably cold. More tired.
             “I’ve been doing some research,” Ra’s says. “You have been quite uninterested in our sexual activity.”
             “It’s because I object to the rape,” Tim says.
             “Ah, I think not. I think you’re simply not … stimulated enough. So I found out what you might be interested in.”
             “Please don’t—”
             The papers are slapped onto the table like a death warrant, and Tim is stared in the face by his last six months of search history.
             man turns little brother gay big dick blowjob looks back at him like the antichrist with flaming, doomed eyes. Tim pales. He tries to think of exactly what he’d been searching on PornHero before Ra’s had caught up with him, but his mind is suddenly completely blank.
             bears rail twink anal dp rimming glares accusingly at him. Tim knows that Ra’s has a perfectly neutral expression on his face. He always does. But Tim can’t force himself to meet the green eyes, not even on the pain of losing some of his pride.
             “And some more enlightening content,” Ra’s adds, putting another piece of paper on the table. Tim can barely bring himself to open his eyes and look.
             batman fucks robin hard in the ass, batman and robin blowjob, batmanxrobin—
             Tim covers his eyes. He can’t take it.
             “You’re particularly understimulated in the bedroom. Would you prefer that I don a suit in the manner of your adopted father? Would you enjoy referring to me as—”
             “No!” Tim almost screams. He wants to cover his ears. “Ra’s, please. Please don’t, okay? I’ll be good, okay? I’ll pretend I like getting fucked. Just please stop.”
             Ra’s makes a little humming sound. “This is not a punishment, Beloved. I am simply curious.” The rustling sound of papers lets him know what’s going on. “Though perhaps you can explain this? Superboy x reader fluffy love fanfiction?”
             Tim turns white.
             “I’m going to kill myself,” he declares, and he’s not sure if he’s joking or not.
             4. Install safety bars on windows; learn modern youth jargon
           “I’m going to kill myself,” Timothy says.
           It’s something he says a lot. Quite a bit, really, typically any time something goes even a little wrong. Timothy had explained to him, a sullen glare in his eyes, that it was a joke. Ra’s had eventually been persuaded.
           The fact that Timothy is crouched on the window ledge, the mountain wind making long-grown dark hair—tended to with the most expensive shampoos—swirl out behind Timothy, makes the thought of him joking much less likely.
           “That is a choice you will regret,” Ra’s says coolly. He could try to grab him, but Timothy would fall out of the window and die anyways. Then when it came time to punish him properly, Timothy could attempt to childishly shift the blame.
           Timothy flips him off.
           Ra’s raises an eyebrow. “How rude, Beloved.”
           “Yeet,” Timothy says. Ra’s assumes this also means I’m going to kill myself because right after Timothy does it, he’s falling through the air. Ra’s doesn’t hear the crack of his bones or see the blood spatter, but he sees the broken body splayed in the snow below, certainly dead.
           “How inconvenient,” Ra’s says, to nobody in particular. Except, perhaps, the three guards who monitor Timothy at all times. He makes a mental note to have them executed.
             6. Discourage your detective from staging coups
             “Fuck,” Tim says.
             “Indeed.” Ra’s’s teeth are perfect, pearly white. A wickedly curved sword at his side slowly drips blood into the oceans pooled around his feet, the corpses’ blood eking its way towards Tim’s booted feet.
             Tim stomps. Blood splashes, staining the bottom of his robes. “Fuck!”
             Ra’s sheathes his sword. The front of his shirt is crimson, showing that he, at least, did not escape unscathed. Tim draws some small satisfaction from that, even though he feels the guards still loyal to Ra’s grab at his shoulders, yanking his arms behind his back and holding him still.
             “A valiant attempt, Detective,” Ra’s says. “Next time, I suggest purging your dissenters’ ranks for spies more carefully.” He moves forward, and Tim sags slightly in the arms of the guards.
             “I’m sorry?” Tim offers.
             “You’re not.”
             Tim sticks his tongue out.
             7. Properly reprimand your detective
             “I’m sorry,” Tim whimpers, head hanging between his shoulders as he stares down at the bed beneath him, fingers curled in the sheets, eyes squeezed shut in pain.
             A hand cards gently through sweaty hair. “Shh, Timothy, it will be over soon,” Ra’s murmurs. The back of the boy’s thighs and buttocks are covered in red switch marks, from the birch thing that Ra’s holds in the hand that does not hold Timothy. The skin burns red and pink and parts bleed. Timothy won’t be able to sit down for a month without remembering this.
             The next one whips down with a wicked noise. Timothy chokes, spasms, arms shaking. He gasps, tears clinging to his long, pretty lashes like pearls.
             “You are free to cry if you like, Beloved,” Ra’s says softly. “Forty out of fifty. You’re almost finished.”
             8. Curb attempts to relate to the youth
           Ra’s throws his sword. It impales the man through the gut; a wound that will leave him squirming for hours in agony before he finally expires.
           “Yeet.”
           (Timothy doesn’t speak to him for a week.)
             9. Keep track of possessions around your detective
           “Is that my cape, Detective?”
           Tim wraps the green folds further around himself, his small form almost disappearing inside of it. “Maybe.”
           “Are you going to return it?”
           The high collar hides Timothy’s face, and slightly muffles his answer. “No.”
            10. Take very good care of your detective, and give it nobody else to turn to when it hurts
           Timothy’s eyes are wide, blank oceans, full of a sort of pain and sadness that Ra’s knows will pass, but he still almost dislikes seeing in his consort’s eyes. Ra’s’s arm is wrapped around him, fingers splaying dark hair around them, Timothy warm against his chest. His eyes are closed, the two of them wrapped in Ra’s’s cape. Before, Timothy would flinch away whenever he was to be held. Now, he almost begs to be touched with his eyes, even when he is too proud to ask.
           A shift of him. Ra’s stays still, doesn’t move, enjoying the fact of Timothy against him. A hand slowly pets his hair.
           Something is wet against his chest, where the neck of his shirt is cut down to reveal his chest. Ra’s almost has to pry Tim’s face off of him, and it comes away teary.
           “How do you fair, my love?”
           A hand rests on Ra’s’s shoulder, pale fingers against dark, tanned skin. The eyes look past Ra’s.
           “I hate you,” Timothy whispers. It’s not an accusation. Simply a sad, broken confession.
           “I know,” Ra’s says, almost, almost sympathetic.
           A pause,
           A long, long pause.
           “I love you,” Tim whispers, and it’s even softer, barely audible. And then he’s diving back against Ra’s’s chest, Ra’s’s head tucked above Tim’s.
           “I know,” Ra’s murmurs.
           The look in his eyes is the stare of a man who has killed millions, and will kill millions more.
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elijahfitz · 4 years
Text
and introduction.
meet elijah.
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hey guys! im lina! im 18 and im in the cst timezone. im currently a freshman in college and ive also been rping for like 6 years now ( i started on the neopets chat boards. if thats not an embarrassing fun fact idk what is ) but i havent rped since this summer since school was and still is kicking my ass. im really into musical theater, marvel & dc, and disney! i also used to be a lifeguard at a great wolf lodge for 2 years so if u want any funny stories about stupid children, or even just wanna be friends, lmk! im also SUPER sorry this intro is so late. i was gonna do it yesterday but then my friends wanted to hang and it kinda went downhill from there. im actually posting this like 20 min before i have a lab practical so i wont be able to reply until late tonight, but like this post to plot or anything!
some fun facts abt elijah:
he was adopted when he was around 3-4? he was abandoned and left on the back of a merchant cart headed to corona, where he was then discovered and then put into the local orphanage since no one was sure where he came from or who left him. all he had was a stuffed bear (named wooly), a basket of water and fruits to eat, and a letter that explained that:
his name was elijah
he was 2 (born on february 28th)
his parents couldnt care for him, so they hoped he would be found by a kind soul who could either take care of and love him, or else get him to someone who could
they loved him and only left him in the hopes that he would have a better life
he lived in the orphanage for almost 2 years and the few months before the 2nd anniversary of his arrival, rapunzel & eugene visited the orphanage that eugene grew up in and fell in love w/ eli, promptly adopting him soon after. he barely remembers anything about his abandonment and time in the orphanage, but always wanted to find his birth parents and let them know how he turned out. he kept the bear and basket in his room but carries the letter around with him in his wallet wherever he goes.
his full name is elijah frederic fitzherbert. he was given the middle name frederic in honor of his grandfather.
but, he much rather prefers eli. doesnt mind formalities but insists on people who know him to call him by his nickname. except he HATES being called “highness” bc he thinks it sounds stupid. he wont get upset per se if u keep referring to him as “your highness” but he will get annoyed
he very much wants to fulfill his role as “corona’s golden boy” by contributing back to his people. he worries for the kingdom more than he worries for himself and is always trying to prove that he is worthy of being a prince rather than just some random kid who got lucky enough to get adopted. most of his days are spent doing modest favors and helping out the townspeople or visiting the villages surrounding the kingdom.
when he’s in the castle you can almost always find him in the kitchen! boi loves to bake and cook. he loves the way food can bring joy to everyone. he often makes goods to give to the townspeople or the kids at the orphanage, where he volunteers at least every 2 weeks when hes not busy w prince stuff.
has an acute fear of disappointment. he feels so much pressure to prove his worth that came from growing up thinking if he did anything wrong he’d be sent back to orphanage, esp since his parents had another child. they wouldn’t want or need him anymore. he mostly got over this when he broke a vase when he was 12 and tried to run away from home, except he fell out the tree that he used to climb out his window and broke his leg lmao. his parents assured him that no matter what he did they would still love him and never abandon him, and his dad also taught him how to climb trees and roofs without dying (much to his mom’s chagrin). even tho hes pretty much over it, it kinda lingers subconsciously. thus, he overcompensates in everything he does and gets overly anxious about small problems
growing up he thought the stories that his dad told him about his past were so cool, despite the fact that he would almost always only hear those stories when he was being taught lessons of what he shouldnt do. he used to run around pretending to be flynn rider and his dad played along, planning play heists for them to do together (think scott & cassie in that one scene from ant man and the wasp) but they stopped when eli hit that age where he thought it was embarrassing to play w his dad. but, it really helped him bond w eugene and help him work on his coordination bc eli is CLUMSY AF
eli legit trips over nothing at least twice a day.
he bonded w his mom through art tho, which eventually turned into aesthetic desserts and meals! thats another reason why he loves baking and cooking so much.
when his 1st sibling was born when he was 5 at first he was jealous. he didnt get much attention at the orphanage due to the fact that there were so many kids and he was just starting to get used to the idea of having parents didnt have tons of kids always trying to win their affection and attention. he thought having a little sibling was the worst thing in the world and would hide from his parents bc if they couldnt find him they couldnt send him away. he hated his sibling.
until he met them. the second he saw their chubby face he was hooked. he swore that he would do anything and everything for them. and that continued when his parents adopted his other siblings as well. he absolutely adores them and acts like the protective older bro role
thankfully, with such a large age gap eli never rlly had to go through any of those petty squabbles that siblings usually have. he was always pretty protective of them tho and would fight when he thought they were being reckless and dumb out of his own fear that if they got hurt he would be an awful big brother (again, fear of disappointment)
he loves to travel bc his mom would always take him to these extravagant kingdoms and on these amazing sightseeing trips
this boy is hopeless when it comes to love. i can imagine lots of ppl liking him on top of all the ppl throwing themselves at him bc royal, but him being completely oblivious and thinking that no one likes him.
he had rlly bad ADD as a kid but its gotten better as hes grown. he still occasionally struggles w executive functioning tho and always gets rlly frustrated when he cant focus or remember
like i said earlier, clumsy af. no coordination. the only athletic ability he ever had was horse riding and running
that said he has a horse named may (short for mayonnaise. dont ask
he likes music a lot. prob learned piano at a young age
he probably is at the party bc royals? idk
EDIT: although (currently) unknown to eli, his true birth mother is maleficent. when eli was 2, his birth father took him away from her and had her suppress eli’s natural born powers. his father realized he was unfit to care for him, so he was the one who abandoned eli.
wanted connections!!
obv his parents and siblings? i mean cmon
one ( or both???? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) of his birth parents!!!!! they dont have to know that eli is their son or mayb they do and are too scared to tell him, but being trapped together will eventually make it revealed
childhood friends! people he met when he traveled w his mom or met at royal social functions? i rlly also want friends that he would hang w at all the royal galas and stuff and they would go do dumb stuff like look sneak out and look for secret passages of make bets of who could dump more crab cakes into the stuffy duchess’ purse when she wasnt looking
people who know him solely through his family
someone who likes eli and eli legit has no clue, no matter how much they flirt and drop hints
people who hate eli! or even just dislike him, which makes him upset bc he doesnt like the idea that there are ppl who dont like him in the world. mayb bc sometimes he gets super highstrung when things arent going how they should b and he like lashed out at them once or something. maybe they hate his parents and on principle hate him. idk
someone who was w eli in the orphanage
past relationships? i feel like hes never rlly had a bad breakup tho, its just that they prob just didnt work out. hes also bi so they can b any gender. hes still looking for his otp
idk, legit anything. send me those plots man
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chokefriends · 5 years
Text
Pit-town Strays Ch.1
Kidlaw softness and redneck shenanigans in a northern mining town. Everything's fucked but whatever.
Rated T, no warnings, or just general warnings for setting-specific social ills and violence (racist cops, shitty parents, etc). Someone ordered wholesome kidlaw family feels? well HERE.
[Ch. 1] - Ch. 2 - Ch. 3 - Ch. 4 - Ch. 5
Read on Ao3 too, I’m Ossicle
“What the hell are you going to Pit-town for?” Bellamy chewed at Law with his mouth open, a smarmy sneer on his pasty face.
“None of your business.” Law scowled, turning his eyes away from his brother’s ground-up breakfast. He shoved a random pile of coursework into his backpack.
“Well I know what kids like you go up there to do. Everybody knows.” Bellamy drawled on, like he knew shit about anything besides scamming beer and shooting bottles at the quarry.
“Don’t make assumptions, idiot. I’m just babysitting.”
“Why?”
“It’s called a job? You should try it,” Law suggested primly. “Feet.”
Bellamy lifted his feet off Law’s pile of textbooks. “Why, though? You got that big scholarship, I seen the letter when it came in.”
Law frowned at him. “How did you…”
“Well it was just there, so I read it. Why don’t you move out, if you got all that money? You hate it here so much.”
Law waved this matter aside. “I owe that money to someone. Give me the volvo keys.”
Bellamy didn’t move his stupid stumpy self from the ancient recliner—prized spot in the basement space the three brothers shared. “No, I need it, I’m meeting up with some guys later to go down to the quarry. Dad said I could.”
“Bellamy, I need it to get to town. Just gimme the keys.”
“Well I need it to pick up little ladies! You can hitch, right?”
Law didn’t bother arguing. He sighed through his nose and slid his feet into his severely ratty sneakers before heading out into the yard.
“Don't tell Dad where I am or I'll tell him about your girlfriend!” Law called on his way out.
“Obviously,” Bellamy muttered.
The ancient volvo wasn’t feeling cooperative today, or Law was having a lapse or something because he couldn’t fucking hotwire it. He slammed his fist on the dash and took out his phone. It was an oddly summery fall day—not too cold to walk or bike—but his shoes were getting thin in the soles, and Law didn't like asking his dad for little stuff like that. Didn't wanna be such a burden all the time.
He scrolled through his messages and sent a couple off to see about a ride. But Robin (who'd suggested the job) was teaching, and Baby (sweet, bitter Baby) was already in the sauce.
BB: i cn still come tho? you real stuck?? big bro awwwww im sry
You: Nono dont go driving if youre partying it up, Ill hitch a ride I guess
BB: Where?
You: Just into town
BB: Where in town??????
You: The Pit.
You: or whatever.
BB: LAWWW NOOOOOOOOooo jus kidding lol no judgement here
BB: id sell it on weekends too if i were pretty liek U
You: I’m not selling my ass!!!
BB: Lol
BB: sure
BB: why else ndn boi hangs w miner trash? Shady.
You: Lots of reasons, including a babysitting job. Don’t make assumptions.
BB: “babysitting”” “””job”””’
You: Yes.
BB: God ur sheltered
BB: shltered bebe in u nice rich house
BB: don get picked up there, pit-town piggies love ndn bebes
Law pocketed his phone with an eyeroll and started walking down toward the highway.
Once he’d found a ride and gotten dropped off, it was a twenty minute walk from the highway to the Pit. Law ended up climbing over the bare, rocky hill behind the truck stop, cuz his phone’s map had the place all wrong. On top of the hill, he could see the Pit in all its glory laid out before him.
Pit-town was the weird little enclave where the town’s mine workers were housed, in tar paper houses as outdated as the mine itself. The tangled machinery of the refinery loomed just beyond the houses, and above all that, the smokestacks. White smoke drifted from their peaks, as high above him as the clouds. Nothing except low bush berries grew around here—it was like an outpost on the moon.
Law went down into the village. Men with tattooed arms watched him from pickup trucks, and women smoking in lawn chairs whispered. Half-feral dogs barked and circled.
“Ya lost, hun?” one busty woman called from her front step as he passed, and her friends chuckled.
“No…” he mumbled back, and hurried on as they all laughed.
He was flustered and out of breath by the time he got to the address, on the other fucking side of the whole village. The house was like the rest: a single-storey bungalow on a small plot of land with a car port full of dead appliances. There was a little pink bike lying on the front step, and a short dog chain attached to a pole in the middle of the bare yard. A deep trail had been trod in a circle around the pole but there was no dog in sight. Law went up and knocked lightly.
He stood there for a few minutes, feeling the neighborhood eyes on his back, before trying again. He knocked a little louder. “Hey, um. Hello?”
A harsh voice called, “YEAH IT’S OPEN.”
Law tried the door. “No it’s not?” he called back.
“YEAH IT IS JUST KICK IT AND TURN THE THING AT THE SAME TIME.”
“...No, definitely not open,” Law assured him after trying every kick-turn combination.
“AH FUCK.”
“Yeah.”
“OKAY, CAN YOU JUST BREAK IN?”
“...What??” Law was almost offended.
“I’M DOING A THING, CAN’T GET THE DOOR RIGHT NOW, JUST TRY SOMETHING.”
Obviously Law could break into stuff, because his shitty little brothers thought it was hilarious to lock him out of the house all the time. And because their father thought it was prudent to keep things like Law’s ID in a secure location. Law didn’t think that skill set was a great way to start this ‘job’ thing, though… He looked around at the prying eyes across the street and they flitted back behind their blinds. He sighed.
The lock was just one of the doorknob ones, and the jamb didn’t have a guard on it so it was easy to get a credit card in there. The door swung open and Law stepped into a cluttered hallway.
“In here!” the big voice called from down the hall.
“I here!” a little voice added.
Law navigated his way carefully, stepping over baskets of laundry, unreturned empties, and sealed up moving boxes. Something obnoxious was playing on tinny speakers in another room. He rounded the corner into a sweltering little kitchen that seemed like the only clear spot in the house.
There was a very tall redhead with a face full of piercings sitting at the kitchen table in his boxers, and a much smaller redhead in a frilly blue bathing suit beside him. They were painting their toenails black, with their feet up on the table.
The bigger redhead seemed really shocked to see Law. He almost toppled backward on his chair. “H-hi! Uh! You’re Native.”
Law blinked. “Yeah. Um. You’re naked.”
“I’m Nami!” announced the little girl.
The guy was pretty much naked, by Law’s standards. Also kind of jacked… Law could feel his face heating up and was glad that it didn’t really show on him. The man sitting there in his boxers was pale as a fucking ghost, though, and so his sudden flush was super obvious. He rushed to recover from that intro.
“I don’t mean like, ‘oh, you’re Native.’ Well, obviously you are, heh, but I don’t mind or anything!"
“Yeah, uh.” Law nodded helpfully. “I don’t mind either, that you’re… naked.”
“Kidd is a naked...” Nami sang to herself.
“I'm not even,” Kidd protested. “I'm just hot as hell. Aren't you hot?”
“Am I??” Law was completely lost.
“Not—! I mean, yeah, but you're in a hoodie? Aren't you sweltering?” Kidd clarified.
“Oooh. No, not really. I like to keep covered up,” Law explained, picking at a fraying sleeve. He supposed it was weird to be wearing jeans and a hoodie in this weather, but no weirder than wearing Crocs in public, like people here seemed into doing.
Kidd was distracted by Nami painting patterns on her feet with the nail polish. “Fuck, Nami, stop, we just paint the nails. It’s messy, see? MESSY.” He took the tiny girl and sat her on the counter instead, then went about cleaning up the table. “Sorry about the door. Can’t go anywhere with wet toenails, it smears like hell.”
Law nodded harder and went to help him. “It’s cool, I know how to break into stuff. I mean I don’t usually! But your door was easy. Not that I’ll do it again!”
“Not a problem… uh, Kidd. I’m Kidd. Hi.” The guy finally got his head together and extended a hand. His fingernails were painted black too. He had a really firm grip.
“Law,” Law replied in relief.
“And this is my sister Nami,” Kidd jabbed a thumb at the toddler perched precariously on the counter. “She’s a fucking psychopath.”
Nami ignored them, sticking towels into the toaster instead.
“You have a dog too? I saw the chain outside.” Law wondered.
“No, Dad took the dog with him. And the fuckin car…”
“Your parents are both working?” Law asked, and immediately regretted it. God, he really was sheltered.
Kidd blushed again and started stacking dishes.
Law rushed to clarify. “Or, ‘parent'? I only got one too—a dad. I'm adopted though, and my birth parents are both passed, so.”
Kidd was wiping off each dish absently under the running water, not really cleaning anything. “We got a dad and mom, they’re just… not around right now. So it’s just us! Which is better, believe me.” He growled the last bit under his breath.
“Oh, got it.”
“Anyway. I didn't wanna ask someone to come all the way here to watch Nami, but that bitch down the street won’t take her anymore because of lice or property damage or something, and I got an interview today. I’ll prolly find another illegal daycare somewhere around here if I do get this job, though, heh.”
“Yeah don’t worry about it.” Law tried not to seem squeamish at the mention of lice.
“If they do take me I’ll be starting right away, so I might be out til pretty late,” Kidd warned him. “I’ll pay you for however long you’re here for though.”
“Sounds good. You gonna work at the mine?”
This seemed like another sensitive issue. Kidd looked away and muttered, “No… you gotta be 21, and take all these courses and stuff. And anyway, like HELL will I end up in the fuckin pit,” he finished with unexpected heat.
Law was saved from having to come up with a response by Nami blowing up the toaster outlet. The kitchen appliances all blinked out.
“FUCK! Again…” Kidd rushed to pick her up and sit her back on the table as a loud dryer beep sounded from the bathroom. “And fuck, there’s my pants. Listen, can you grab a fuse from the drawer there and stick it in? I actually REALLY gotta go, like right now.”
“Yeah of course!” Law watched the strange redhead duck through the kitchen door and pick his way down the obstacle course hall to another door.
He pulled his eyes away from the muscled back and onto the little girl, who was… eating nail polish.
“You!” Law scolded her, and put her in a chair. He grabbed the few towels that weren’t burnt, and tied her to the aluminum frame. “Okay, eat cheez-its while I fix this.”
Law had got the new fuse screwed into the panel and the nail polish off Nami’s face by the time Kidd came back, dressed in clothes that didn’t seem like interview clothes to Law: heavy duck pants and steel-toed boots. He grabbed a duffel bag that was sitting on a box stack, shouldered it and then stood looking at Law.
“Uh,” Kidd was blushing again. It was kind of amazing to see this tough blacklung brat acting so unsure. “If I come back really late maybe I could bring something? To eat? And we could eat it here?”
“Yeah, that'd be good.” Law shrugged like he didn't mind either way.
“KFC?” Kidd suggested.
“Oh I don't like breaded stuff. Fries are good, though.”
“Chinese?”
“I'm trying not to eat MSG actually…”
Kidd tried to think. “So what do you eat?”
“Mostly sushi.”
“I didn't know there was any sushi places in this shit town,” Kidd admitted.
“At the college there's one. Uh, but whatever you bring is fine, don't worry about it!” Law reassured him.
“Okay. Well, see ya.” Kidd made his way outside, yelling at some hovering dogs to git!, then started swearing. “Aw fuck, Nami's FUCKING bike…”
“You trip on it?” Law poked his head outside.
“No,” Kidd was looking at an empty front walk. “Fuckin kids took off with it again. I'll just go punch their dad in the throat later, not a big deal.”
“Holy,” Law commented mildly.
He watched Kidd pull a frankenstein-ian motorcycle out of a side door and roar away on it. Then he looked around to see if anyone had caught him looking. He was just sending a good glare at the prying eyes across the street when he remembered that he was babysitting. He returned to the kitchen where Nami was sitting once again on top of the table, drawing circles in a nail polish puddle with one finger.
“Your brother is an entire entrée,” Law informed her.
She didn't reply, intent on her craft. But she objected when he tried to pick her up. “Nooo!”
“No?” he put her down.
She glared at him, a tiny girl of no more than four, ginger hair in little pigtails and her frilly blue bathing suit spotted with nail polish.
“I'm Law,” he sat down so he was at her level, and introduced himself. “Lawww.”
“Law...” She appraised him solemnly for another moment and then seemed to deem him acceptable. “I’m being a witch,” she confided in a whisper.
“A witch?”
“Yah.”
Law sat back in the chair with a laugh. “My girl! Let's talk!”
Law had the kitchen scrubbed to his own exacting standards in short order, having secured Nami firmly to a chair (with duct tape and towels this time).
She was starting to nod into her cheezits by the time he'd finished, and Law figured it was nap time. He went to review the rooms along the hallway, looking for a baby room. He couldn't figure out the logic of the place, though. There was a largeish bedroom, which seemed to be the source of the stale smoke smell, mostly taken up by a tacky king bed and Seinfeld DVDs. It clearly hadn't been used in forever. He closed that door. Then there was a smaller room that might've once been a child's room, decorated with glow in the dark stars on the ceiling and complex Lego structures piled in one corner. It was stacked floor to ceiling with file boxes and covered in dust too. Another small room seemed to be Kidd's hideout, though the bed was just a box spring covered in laundry and books. There was a guitar and practice amp, and a desk piled with half-dissected old laptops. Law resisted the urge to snoop, and closed the door.
He went back down to the other end of the hall, past the front door, where the narrow corridor opened into a small living room space. A couch and a single mattress were neatly made up into beds, in front of a large TV that seemed like the only new thing in the house.
“I want a Kidd nap.” Nami had somehow gotten out of the duct tape high chair and was at Law's side, rubbing her eyes.
“Okay? In the big bed?”
“You're silly,” she accused. She went to lie down on the couch, pulling a fuzzy blanket over herself.
Law went to sit next to her. He gestured down at the mattress on the floor, with its orange and blue comforter and many fuzzy cushions. “Is that your bed? Don't you wanna nap there?”
“No,” she explained patiently, eyes already closed.
“Right, obviously.”
He watched her shuffle and sigh her way to sleep.
“I could've had a sister,” he murmured, partly to her and partly to himself. “I mean, I do have a biological sister, but I didn't grow up with her. I think it would've been nice, though…”
Nami was already asleep when he looked over again. Easy! Law totally had this babysitting thing in hand. He pulled his stats assignment out of his bag, and got down to the real work.
Nami turned out to be a pretty chill baby, as well as being an utter terror. She mostly ignored Law, preferring to go about her little play tasks uninterrupted, with the TV playing in the background. “Being a witch,” she explained whenever Law asked what she was doing.
“Keep it up,” he encouraged her, turning back to his own work.
He quickly learned, though, to keep an ear out for silence, because she was probably blowing shit up. Law found her building a fire in the oven, then making what he was pretty sure was mustard gas in the toilet.
“How’d you do that??” He took the bleach from her and she threw a mild fit before toddling off to the next game.
By the time Kidd returned, Law was just sitting in a kitchen chair with his stats assignment disregarded in front of him, watching the four-year-old expertly jimmy the makeshift lock he'd put on the knife drawer.
“More twist on the lever,” an amused Law recommended.
“So this one's being a psychopath huh,” Kidd entered and threw his duffel bag on the table.
Law corrected him.“Um, she's a witch and a prodigy? She made several deadly potions with cleaning supplies today."
“Oh jesus now there's two of you.”
“One more and we got a coven.”
“Great. Nami, it's like 11, why ain't your ass in bed?” Kidd growled at his sister, who ignored him.
“She went down for a couple hours, but kept getting up when she heard a car go by. And I couldn't get any pajamas on her,” Law reported.
“Yeah she won't take the bathing suit off unless I bribe her. She's big into being a ‘mermaid’ this month, on top of being a witch.”
Nami had gotten the knife drawer open and was feeling around in it with one chubby hand.
Kidd scooped her up. “No knives.”
“A knife!!!”
Law shook his head and smiled. Child after his own heart. “What's she want a knife for?”
“She's been trying to slash my tires lately, so probably that. It's usually pretty funny to watch, but yeah, not at bedtime. Eh, Nami?”
“I WAN A KNIFE! A KNIFE A KNIFE A—”
Nami stopped and stared at the chocolate coin Kidd was holding up. She grabbed it and wiggled out of his arms. They followed her to the living room where she was stashing her prize under the couch.
“Holy, she's got a hoard,” Law gave a low whistle at the cache of foil coins and random shiny things.
“Yeah I think she's more dragon than mermaid,” Kidd commented.
Nami lay down in her floor bed, where she could see the glittering pile.
“I got food, if you wanna…?” Kidd nodded back toward the kitchen.
“Is she good here?”
“Yeah she pretty much puts herself to sleep, just leave WrestleMania on for her. She likes the noise.”
They went back to the kitchen, and Kidd turned on a thing Law had thought was a smashed toaster oven reconstructed with safety pins, but which turned out to be a radio. Kidd gestured to a bag on the table, and Law unpacked it while the redhead fiddled with the receiver. It mostly seemed to be picking up country music and static.
“Can almost get that alt rock station with this thing,” he muttered, “probably just needs another coat hanger.”
“You went and got sushi??” Law pulled out several little plastic containers.
Kidd’s back was to him but Law could see his neck and ears going red. He kept fiddling with the dials. “Yeah, whatever.”
“From all the way at the college?”
“Yeah. Whatever.”
“...I think that radio is using you as an antenna,” Law observed, changing the topic.
Kidd snorted and let go of the screwdriver-dial, and the radio went to mostly static. “Faboo. Maybe it wants a piercing too.”
His face had returned to a normal color under all that metal, and he joined Law at the table. Law offered him the dragon roll and took the sashimi plate.
The chopsticks were an obstacle.
“Do you stab it?” Kidd glared at the sushi and the two little sticks.
“No, look at my hand: hold one like a pencil, and the other one loosely—”
“I stab it.”
“Don’t stab it, hey, you’ll ruin the integrity of the roll shape!”
“Hm,” Kidd chewed his mangled piece. “Tastes like salad.”
“Here.” Law scooted over a chair. He took the chopsticks out of Kidd’s fist and rearranged them. Kidd’s hands were large and rough to the touch, and the scent of sweat and gas clung to his clothes. The sudden impression of body heat and machinery smacked Law right in the back of the brain.
“I’m gonna say this is finger food,” Kidd decided.
“Yeah,” Law agreed automatically.
“Yeah, fuck this. Want a beer?”
Law hated beer. “Yeah. I mean, whatever.”
Law sat and nursed the beer with determination, trying to pay attention to Kidd's animated take on government surveillance vans and Nicolas Cage. His brain was getting fuzzy really fast, though. He was such a fuckin lightweight.
“He’s not an actual human person, is all I’m saying. You seen his face tryna do face stuff?” Kidd argued, crunching his second beer can and tossing it in the bin across the room. "Nother beer? Hey, you’re not even done that one.”
“Tastes like bread,” Law noted distractedly.
“I guess. You don’t like Bud?”
“I liked the first movie,” Law hiccuped.
Kidd laughed like a fucking hooligan, and Law had to laugh too. Normally loud laughs grated on Law's ears, but he decided he liked this one. It wasn't mocking or cold; just big.
Kidd shook his head with a final chuckle and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Me too. Sooo uh, what you studying at the college?”
“General science right now, thinking I'll go into the pre-med stream,” Law answered right away. “Or maybe something more research, less clinical… uh. Or you know, like. Whatever.”
Kidd actually seemed interested. “Yeah that sounds awesome. I always wanted to go into engineering, but pure research would be cool… You um. Doing some math, there?” He looked over at Law's assignment, abandoned on the table.
“Stats. The bane of my existence. Don't stare at it too long, it'll put the bleed on your brain.”
“...you're stuck, huh?” Kidd glanced over again.
“No.” Law sniffed. “I'm considering it from many angles.”
“Okay, man.”
“Oh, like you know anything about sample sizes and shit.”
Kidd shrugged, but the line in his forehead deepened. He cracked another tallboy.
Law gripped his own beer can in the uncomfortable silence that followed, and then downed the rest all at once.
“Nother,” he wiped his mouth and Kidd raised an eyebrow but passed him a fresh one.
“Git it in ya.”
“Mhm.” Law took a deep swig and almost fucking barfed. “Sooo… you make that bike yourself huh?”
“...yeah,” Kidd's face lost the put-out look and split into a grin. “Or whatever, I just added some stuff and changed other stuff… actually, it's…”
That got another good long ramble out of the redhead, full of startling laughter and crass parallels with female body parts. Law wondered idly if Kidd was actually familiar with any female body parts, or whether this was just how people in Pit-town talked.
“Hm?” Law sat up straight, realizing that Kidd had asked him something. His brain was definitely all swimmy now.
“Or I can give you a lift back now. It's a long way to the Rez.”
“I'm not from the Rez, I live down the highway. I can just hitch my way back, it's not a big deal." Law looked at his phone—after midnight.
Kidd was giving Law a look, like he wanted to say something about that, but then grunted and downed his beer instead. “Here, for today,” he said, taking an envelope out of his pocket and pushing a few folded bills into Law's hand.
“Thanks.”
“If you're free tomorrow I'll be working again at noon. And like I said, you can stay here tonight if the trip out is—”
“Oh!” Law felt his face heating up again. “No, I gotta get home. My dad's gonna kill me as it is. I'll come back tomorrow, though, okay?”
“Okay! Or, whatever, good.”
“Yeah.” Law stood and started stuffing things back into his backpack. “Okay see ya tomorrow.”
Kidd gave him a flippant salute and cracked another beer.
Pulling on his sneakers at the door, Law felt a little tug at his pant leg.
“Law, you are going to go?” Nami worried.
“Yup, gotta go home.”
“Law, you won't be here if you go,” she started snuffling.
Law picked her up and put her back in her bed. “I'll come back tomorrow. Okay?”
“No.” She hid under the blanket and kept snuffling.
He hesitated. “I have to go.”
“She’ll get over it in a minute,” Kidd told him from the doorway, leaning backlit against the frame with crossed arms. “It's better not to draw it out.”
Law looked at the little lump among the cushions and shrugged. He stood to go.
The redhead chewed at his tongue piercing and watched him. “Okay, I don't wanna be weird about this, but like. It's the Pit. And you're... You know?”
Law wasn't getting it. “I'm...?”
“C'mon, you stick out. And it's really late, and it's just past check day, and… it'd really just be faster if I gave you a ride.”
Oh, fucking chivalry or whatever.
“So I'll put my hood up,” Law dismissed this.
“It’s the Pit, though,” Kidd said again.
“... See you tomorrow.” Law left without drawing it out any further.
Law got halfway through the village before someone pulled up next to him, apparently to offer him further unwanted courtesies.
“Looking for a place to stay?” the man offered.
“Just heading home,” Law deflected.
This didn't seem to be the answer the guy wanted, and he followed Law in his pickup at very close range, until they got to the village limits and the end of the street lights. Law gripped his phone in his pocket. He heard the truck door slam just as he went to detour off the road between two houses.
Law tried not to back away as the guy advanced. “I'll call the police.”
“I am the police,” the man pointed to the badge on his belt.
"Shit..."
"And you're trespassing."
Law held onto his phone, a harsh roaring steadily growing in his ears. The smart thing would be to play dumb and helpless so he wouldn't fucking get shot, and just hope someone came by… but the man went to grab him and he panicked just as the roar peaked. Law snapped the fist holding his phone into the man's temple, and it made a loud crunch. A couple more frantic strikes sent the pig down in a confused pile of limbs.
Well he'd fucking done it now. Maybe he could run before—
“Oohhh shit, haha,” someone commented.
Law glared over at Kidd, who was sitting there on his noisy rat bike, peering at the man on the ground.
“Hi?” Law crossed his arms.
Kidd scratched his neck. “Saw him drive past after you left, and figured… yeah. I was just gonna come and like, bam! Do a drive-by with a crowbar. But that Rocky shit was actually way cooler, haha. Is that a brass knuckles phone ring?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah…” Kidd considered the lump on the ground. “Kay, well. Can I drive you home now?”
“...” Law really, stubbornly wanted to refuse.
“Just so you can see how Marlene here rides,” Kidd patted the motorcycle. “Did I tell you I built her?”
Law's tension cracked and an incredulous laugh bubbled out. “Yeah. You told me. She's a beauty.” Kidd passed him the helmet and Law slid into place behind him.
“She’s a rubber-tit, chain-smoking old blacklung biddy, fuck yeah she's a beauty. You can ride her all day and night, she don't get tired.”
Law had been wondering how he'd get all the way home like this without popping a boner, but that mental image cleared it up.
“Uh,” Law gave the unconscious cop a guilty glance, “should we get this guy somewhere…?”
“Oh, I'll just call his wife to come get him, I guess,” Kidd snorted at the pathetic pile and took out his phone.
“You know him?”
“Everyone knows everyone here… hold on a sec. Hey, Mrs. Kyle? Yeah I just seen Kevin going off tryna fight that goose again.”
“Fuckin what??” Law snickered.
“Yeah, Cobb Road. Looked like he'd taken a good one on the head already. I dunno who taught that thing to make a fist. Yeah, anyway. Yeah, bye.” Kidd hung up, nodding to himself like that was it.
“No one's gonna believe that shit,” Law objected.
“Oh the goose? That's real, the thing's a monster. I think they should just shoot it but there's a pool on who'll defeat it in hand-to-hand combat.”
“...okay. Sure.”
“It's the Pit,” Kidd explained again.
Kidd tied a bandana onto his face as a windguard, and they pulled out of the village and onto the highway. It was fall but the air was warm and smelled like tar. Law held onto Kidd's waist and directed him by patting his arm and pointing. The smokestacks receded behind them, though the tar smell lingered on through the treeless landscape. Eventually Law signaled for them to stop.
Kidd pulled off the highway and stopped just under the lone streetlight at the turnoff. He looked around. “This is just a carpool lot. I might as well take you all the way home, right?”
“Nah, my Dad's already gonna be pissed that I'm out this late. If I ride up on a bike smelling like booze… yeah.” Law passed him the helmet and dismounted. “It's not far from here, I'm good now.”
Kidd was still processing the first part. “Aren't you in uni? You still have a curfew?”
Law shrugged. “He's strict. He just worries. Though, yeah, he's nowhere near as protective about my fuckin brothers so—”
At that exact moment Law's brain registered the whine of a familiar car, and he had to grip his bag to keep from bolting. He relaxed slightly when he saw it was just the Volvo.
“Hey Lawnboy,” Bellamy chuckled, leaning an elbow out the window.
“Hiii Law,” a gawky, sharp-eyed girl chirped from the passenger seat.
“Monet, my dream girl,” Law flirted mildly, leaning on the door frame. Monet giggled and Bellamy scowled.
“That your ~boyfriend~?” the blond troll mocked, jabbing a thumb at Kidd, who tensed and sneered.
“Yeah,” Law shot back.
There was a pause.
“Really???” Monet scrambled to get a good look at them both. Bellamy's face went slack with shock.
Kidd stuffed his head into the safety of his helmet.
“What're you doing?” Law questioned the helmeted Kidd.
“He's shy!” Monet squealed. “Ahhhh you guys are perfect!”
“Are you blushing?” Law tried to flip up the mirrored visor and Kidd held on stubbornly, shaking his head.
“Law, bring him to Hawk's place with us, I'll make youse guys’ drinks!! I got sourpuss and peach schnapps!”
“They're not coming to Hawk's,” Bellamy told her sullenly.
“Shut up Bellamy. Law, you guys coming?”
Law demurred. “Gotta work tomorrow, Monet-fique. Nother time.”
“Aw.”
“See you at home, Bellyache,” Law dismissed his pouting brother, who scowled.
“‘Babysitting’, huh. I'm telling Dad you're hoeing it up in the Pit,” Bellamy threatened.
Monet punched him in the shoulder. “Oh my god Bellamy no you're not. Later, Law! Byyye, strong silent boyfriend!”
Bellamy took his cue and screeched away.
Law turned back to Kidd, who was still hiding under his helmet. “Sorry. That was my brother. It just seemed like the best way to get him to leave.”
Kidd gave a slight shrug.
“So. See you tomorrow?” Law shouldered his bag.
Kidd nodded.
“Thanks for the ride. And for dinner and stuff…”
“Yeah it's whatever,” came Kidd's muffled voice.
“Oh yeah I mean, whatever.” Law started off down the road.
“Uh…! Thank you too, for… coming...” Kidd called after him a few steps later.
Law stopped and looked back awkwardly.
“...And for being chill about Nami's issues, and the house, and dealing with that creeping fucker… You don't have to come back after that crap. And if all this is gonna get you in trouble with your dad anyway,” Kidd offered in a nervous jumble, as Law wandered back over and stood there, feeling suddenly sad.
Law had had his share of sweet goodbye kisses under this streetlight, when he'd been a little younger and a little less worried about everything. He kinda really wanted another like that right now… But Kidd was holding onto the helmet on his head like a life preserver. And a kiss seemed like such a shallow, wrong-headed kind of assurance to offer against all ‘that crap.’
Law leaned in, and bonked his forehead lightly against the glossy helmet instead.
“Well, pick me up tomorrow, at the highway. So I don't gotta risk crossing the goose,” Law shrugged too, like it really was all just whatever.
He couldn't see Kidd's face but he could see his heaviness lift.
“You got it, Cap.”
The scruffy redhead leaned into his bike and the road, and became a fading engine roar in the dark. Law walked home slowly.
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