#that scene in too far lives rent free in my brain

[baileybeez]

My Top Ten Favorite Bumbleby Moments (My Opinion Obviously)

10. All Fight Scenes

I know I'm technically cheating on this one but whenever these two fight, I know I'm in for a good time. And all of them have been superb. These two are in sync without even communicating with each other. They know each other's abilities and know how to work together well in combat.

9. We're Protecting Each Other

This was a 'you had to be there' moment. It was insane. Even knowing these two would eventually confront Adam, the way they did it blew my mind. I loved seeing these two stand up together to confront Adam and become each other's strength's. They had each other's backs in this moment and were going to do it together.

8. We Were There For Each Other

This moment lived in my head rent free for months after the episode came out. They held hands before this to comfort each other during stressful times. Like Blake reaching out to apologize to Yang when she lost her arm and Blake reaching out when Yang's hand started to shake because of Adam. But this time, Yang reached for Blake in a moment of peace. After everything that happened, she forgave Blake and accepted her after everything they went through together. And all she wanted to do was just hold her hand again.

7. Volume 8 Reunion

The amount of gushing I and many others did during this moment was crazy. We were starved for Bumbleby interactions in Volume 8, especially after Volume 7 did so many with them both. After 24 hours of craziness, the two are at peace once again. Blake at first is worried since they did separate missions Yang might be mad that they didn't work together. But all Yang did to reassure her was smile and the two touched foreheads and later embraced each other. It was such a sweet moment.

6. Date Night

Volume 7 had so many good little bee moments that were adorable and I'm a sucker for fluff. Blake getting her new hair and Yang struggling to compliment it, the selfie, Blake falling asleep on Yang's lap with Yang holding her etc. But the two going to a club and off handedly mentioning they're gonna ignore Team FNKI just to have their own fun. You two can just call it a date, we won't judge lol. With Yang trying to teach Blake how to dance and Blake struggling to learn while laughing. I love how whenever Yang cracks a joke, she looks at Blake because she wants to make sure she see's Blake laughing. Not to mention Nora's comments later in the episode.

"Blake and Yang are off doing they're own thing again."

"Friends huh? Just friends?"

"Two people who have gone through that much? I think there's more going on."

And I will forever be mad RT didn't show us them at their date.

5. The Burning Candle

Ya'll this was the spark that ignited the ship. Not only is the Burning Candle just a great episode but it's an amazing moment for Blake and Yang. We get to see these two open up and communicate their wants and desires. With Yang telling Blake about her past and trying to help Blake so she doesn't push herself too far. And then of course at the end Yang gives her that wink and says 'I'll save you a dance'. Then we later see the two dancing. It was also the first time we saw Blake laughing and happy and it was all because of Yang. Yang who just asked for a dance in return for helping Blake and opening up about her past. I was sold on this ship when this episode came out.

4. How Disarming ~

The gay in my brain would not stop buzzing at this moment. It's amazing seeing how much Blake was the one openly flirting and initiating playful touch. There's a great post by @wixhing0nastar going over Blake's body language throughout the volumes. How a lot of the times Blake is more closed off in her posture, like how she holds herself. But here, she's leaning into to Yang's space and just playfully nudging her. She's not holding back. Also I swear I could hear Blake purr when she said 'How disarming'. Like my breath got caught in my throat. And then when Weiss said 'About time'. I knew this volume had to be the one where they finally get together.

3. Volume 9 Reunion

This is my favorite reunion of Bumbleby. Especially since we had to wait for so long for these two to be reunited. Blake was distraught last volume as she failed to save Yang and thought Yang died in front of her. Yang who had always been there to help her and fight by her side. And the first thing Blake does when she gets a free chance is to tackle hug Yang and hug her tightly. Softly whispering Yang in both disbelief and joy. And Yang simply holds her to reassure her like she did in Volume 8. Honestly, if Weiss and Ruby weren't there they would have probably stayed like that for hours lol.

2. I'm Not Gonna Break My Promise

This used to be my favorite Bumbleby moment of all time and for good reason. Blake and Yang had killed Adam. The first thing Blake does is weep and fall to her knees. She's gone through so much and much of it had to do with him. Her torment of him is over and the person she once knew was dead. And Yang wordlessly just holds her and lets Blake cry. Blake finally gets out that she won't break her promise and swears it. Earlier Adam had mockingly told Yang that Blake made a promise to him once and that she didn't follow through with it. And even earlier in the volume Blake had promised to be there if they faced him. Yang has seen Blake stood by her words with her actions. And just reassures Blake she knows Blake won't break her promise. No more words are exchanged as the two just hold each other and Blake just cries more.

The Confession and Kiss

Was anyone really surprised? I know I wasn't. I loved the number 2 moment on my list so much. But I knew as soon as we got the confession and kiss scene it would more than likely take my top spot. It was all a matter of how it was executed and it was done spectacularly. There's many essays and write ups on why this scene was so good so I apologize if I don't add much to the conversation.

But Blake and Yang are stuck in a punderstorm and are trying to figure out how to get out. With them eventually figuring out they need to say things about each other they've never said before. At this point the two have only really said cute things to each other and then Blake comes out with.

'I think....you're an extraordinary person.'

Honest to god I was already getting emotional from just that as Blake goes in some more. Talking about how Yang does what she says, she brightens others around her and is always brave even when she's scared. The looks and the song Worthy playing in the background only add to how monumental this moment was for me. With Yang talking about how she liked how Blake wasn't intimidated by her even back when they didn't get along. She also talks about how Blake doesn't give up on people even when other people hurt her and she never gives up because she knows what matters to her. Blake has tried to help others and has sometimes failed but she has tried to push through despite labeling herself as a coward. But Yang see's a person always trying to do what's best for the people she loves.

Then we get this moment.

These are my favorite expressions of the whole scene. It's so wholesome, pure and full of love in every detail. At this point the two know what needs to be said but Yang is at first hesitant and the bridge between them widens. Blake asks if Yang thought of something then didn't say it and Yang is so bashful as she is realizing she needs to say those three words. But Yang is scared, she compares it to a cliff and if she goes through with it she'll fall. I've always headcannoed that Yang's greatest fear is letting those she loves down. And that ties into how she fell at Beacon and fell in Volume 8. It can also tie to her with the aftermath of Mercury and feeling she let her team down. She's scared she won't be good enough and will lose it all. It also similarly ties into her abandonment issues.

But Blake points out, they're already falling. Their emotions aren't going to go away just because they're scared. They're already worried for each other when they're fighting to save the world and two thought they were dead last volume. With Blake thinking Yang died and she failed to save her. So Blake encourages Yang gently by telling her to say it.

And after a heavy sigh, Yang confesses with Blake jumping in before she can finish as the two say I love you. The bridge that separated them is gone and they're together. They look at each other with blushing cheeks with Worthy playing in the background. They pull into each other, Blake slowly smiling as they get closer and kiss each other. White lilies sprout from under them as the while lily symbolizes rebirth and rejuvenation of the soul. The flowers are also used at weddings and can also mean purity. It's such a perfect flower to fit this perfect this scene.

And there you have it, my top ten Bumbleby moments. There were lots of moments to choose from and so many of the ones I love unfortunately didn't make it on this list. So here are some honorable mentions down below.

#bumbleby #rwby #sapphic #rwby bumbleby #rwby volume 9 #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #blake x yang #greenlight volume 10 #THIS IS ALL MY OPINION

[fourraccoonsinacoat]

Midnight Prayer | One Shot

Pairing: Astarion x Dark Urge / Tiny bit of Enver Gortash x Dark Urge

Chapter Count: One Shot | Read on AO3 Word Count: 4,016

Summary: Takes place during the events of Baldur's Gate 3 after Gortash's coronation in Act 3. Explores the romance between Astarion and the Dark Urge after the implications of a past relationship between the Dark Urge and Enver Gortash are made known. Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Humor, Idiots in Love, Mentions of Violence, Soft Astarion, Spoilers for the Dark Urge and BG3 in general, Dark Urge as Original Female Character Rating: Mature

Author Note: Those new lines in Patch 6 between Durge and Gortash are to blame for this. Plus the fact that I adore the Astarion x Dark Urge dynamic because they're on the same level, meaning they're both barely functioning beings who no business getting into a relationship and yet they make it work. Also, Astarion gets to be the supportive one when Durge goes off the rails.

All these idiots live rent free in my head and I had this scene that just wouldn't leave me alone until I wrote it out. This is a one-shot based on the same Durge MC, Eli, as my other ongoing fic - which I have not updated in some time, and I am sorry for that. Have some brainrot to make up for it! This is grade-A mushy, soft garbage.

Sleep was difficult to find as Eli lay on the stiff makeshift cot. Her glassy half-focused eyes were fixed on the patchwork ceiling of Astarion’s tent as her mind coiled around and around, like a snake trying to suffocate itself. Her thoughts were circular, aimless and chaotic as she chased the ghosts of memories that always haunted her nights.

Sleeplessness was nothing new, and Eli’s propensity for restlessness and nightmares was well known throughout camp. She had a tendency to toss and turn as rest evaded her, and when the darkness of slumber finally overtook her in the small hours of mornings it was never peaceful. She was often agitated and unsettled, mumbling low to herself until the shock of some cruel fever dream sent her into an outburst of screams as she flailed and fought to rouse herself from whatever terror had uncaged itself in her mind.

She’d wake shivering, breathing as if she were fighting for her life against legions of the Absolute rather than visions within her own mind. He was always there, though, whispering soothing reminders that they were safe. That they were together. That the horrors inside her broken mind were toothless phantoms. Remnants of a fractured past she could only catch flashes of.

She’d offered on many occasions to sleep alone, saying it made little sense for both Astarion and her to suffer because of her tortuous insomnia. He’d been firm in his refusals and finally told her that if she didn’t stop saying such ludicrous nonsense he’d figure out how to charm one of Gale’s used socks to jump down her throat every time she mentioned the idea.

Gods, was she thankful for that absurd and stubborn man.

She turned her head, eyes focusing on the pale elf who slept beside her. They’d settled into a habit of overnighting in his tent due to the plank of wood that served as a haphazard bed. Like her, Astarion’s sleep could be troubled, disturbed by his own breeds of monsters that lurked around the corners in his brain. His past was filled with grim and vicious memories. What small comforts he had been able to acquire over the past 200 years were things he clung to like life rafts upon a boiling and thrashing ocean. The stiff plank he slept on brought him a strange sort of peacefulness. He’d told her once that the only soft bed he’d been allowed to use while under Cazador’s control was the large plush bed in the palace’s guest room. The room where he and the other spawn “entertained” those who were brought back for Cazador to feast upon.

His bed in the dorms had been stiff and old, and yet he’d far preferred it to the lavish guest bed. Sleeping on something too downy and cushioned reminded him of the countless nights he’d spent being smothered into a pliable mattress by whatever piece of transient garbage he’d lured back to the palace. They’d have their way with him while he’d disassociate, his body working through the motions of sex while his mind walled itself off. It had become second nature to disconnect himself from the present the moment he slumped onto that soft bed.

It was a cruel byproduct of his torment that laying on comfortable bedding triggered a deep seeded anxiety in him, but Eli honestly didn’t mind the stiff makeshift cot Astarion had set up in his tent for them. Her body recalled sleeping on worse, even if her mind didn’t clearly remember the details. Astarion had even started laying down a thin bedroll atop the plank once their shared sleeping arrangements became a regular thing. It had been completely unprompted. One evening she’d entered his tent and it had simply been there, an unspoken acknowledgement of the validity of their relationship.

They were both uncouth morons when it came to navigating the delicacies and emotions of romantic relationships. They’d been quick to indulge in one another physically, the both of them looking to find refuge from the specters of their pasts in one another’s arms. They hadn’t meant for it to mean anything, and yet they’d kept seeking one another out - drawn together like kobolds are drawn to shiny objects. They’d tried ignoring their growing affections, but neither one of them were particularly good at pretending to be nonchalant and stable. Primarily because neither one of them really knew what that looked like.

Astarion had confessed first, admitting to his initially manipulative intentions with her and revealing truths about his enslavement to Cazador that made her heart ache for him. Eli knew, instinctively, that empathy was not an emotion she was incredibly familiar with. It made her anxious, feeling for someone else. And yet, when Astarion had said he wanted something real with her, she’d felt an almost wild desperation surge to life within herself. She wanted that, too. With him.

A cruel and vicious voice at the back of her mind had admonished her for her pathetic weakness. She should be punished, skinned alive for allowing herself to feel this kind of fondness and yearning for someone else. Once, she had been worshiped as a god by those around her. Once, she had been feared and her name whispered in awe and horror. Once, she had been something powerful, something violent and vicious, a conduit of destruction and carnage. Though the details were fractured, scattered about her ruined brain like shards of glass, she knew instinctually that she was a child of slaughter and that the bonds of mortals should have been beneath her.

But that didn’t stop her. Perhaps…perhaps she could be different. Something else. Something that was valued as more than just a weapon. Something that wasn’t just a means to an end. Something that didn’t need to butcher and rip the world inside out in order to be loved.

She’d pushed the Urge down, beating it back as she confessed her own affections for Astarion.

That had been some weeks ago, back in the Shadowlands. Now, they were just outside Baldur’s Gate, and things were…good between them. To her never-ending astonishment.

Her eyes focused on the sleeping elf next to her. He looked so peaceful, the worried lines of his face smooth and serene at rest. He was pallid, pretty and perfect like a cadaver forever tranquil. Just one stab, a stake through the heart and he’d always be like this – he’d never know torment or despair again. No one would ever hurt him.

She took a long, slow breath and banished the intrusive thoughts back to the shadows of her mind where they always lingered. She would never…she couldn’t…gods, she hated those thoughts that never let her be. They filled her with a sick guilt as she recalled nights tied up, howling and screaming and raging as she spat out all the ways she’d flay and ruin his beautiful body. Afterwards, once the Urges had quieted, Astarion would simply laugh as he cut her bonds, always joking about how you had to pay good coin for degradation like that in the city. He’d hold her until she calmed, the both of them quiet, content to just be together for one more day.

They shouldn’t work, not as a couple or as anything else, really. They were barely functional as individuals. Together, they should have been about as operational as a dumpster that was missing one wheel and was on fire. But they did work. They were careful with the broken pieces of each other, treating them with reverence and respect. They understood pain all too well, and not just the physical kind but the raw and panicked pain of having everything you valued ripped away. Of having your very self torn from your control…the pain of being used and the fear that no matter how loud you screamed or how hard you fought it would happen again.

The fear that you would never be anything more than a tool.

And so they were gentle with one another, in a way only reserved for them. Careful touches and trusting hands, concerned glances and warm smiles, constant wordless affirmations that they were at one another’s backs - that when one of them crumbled the other would be there to help build them back up, attentively and without judgement.

Neither of them knew what they were doing. Their combined histories with healthy relationships added up to an unsurprising number of zero. Astarion had admitted to her that he couldn’t remember ever bedding the same person twice. And Eli…well, she couldn’t remember anything, frankly. Her memories of past lovers were nonexistent…at least…

At least until today. Today, when they’d finally met the infamous Enver Gortash.

The name had always struck her as strange, from the first time she heard it when Karlach told Eli about the tiefling had acquired her infernal engine. The name had stirred something in her brain, like a familiar tune that she couldn’t remember the words for. And every time someone mentioned him, that sense grew stronger. It was as if there was a crack in her skull and every time she’d reach for that sense of familiarity, it would leak out and away just beyond reach.

Until today, when they stood in the opulent and grand hall of Wyrm’s Rock Fortress, surrounded by the elite of Baldur’s Gate, and she finally saw the man who had wrought so much suffering not only upon the city and the coast, but on her friends…

The flash in his eyes when they met hers…a sense of knowing, a sting of excitement. That spark of familiarity suddenly blazed hot and she knew this man was not a stranger. Not to her…

“If you keep staring, darling, I’m going to start charging you for the privilege,” a soft and slightly chiding voice lurched her back into the present.

Eli flinched, startled, blinking away the haze of her thoughts and focusing on Astarion, who now was peering at her through half-lidded and slightly weary eyes. He’d been sleeping with an arm draped across her waist – Astarion had grown fond of resting with an arm or a hand touching her, and she liked it, too. It was comforting.

He trailed his hand along her side in a calming manner, brows furrowing slightly with a hint of concern.

“Sorry,” Eli said with a slight yawn. “I was worlds away.” She gave him a small, tired smile as she reached out and brushed her fingers against the ruffles of his shirt, mindlessly beginning to fiddle with the cloth.

Astarion’s hand slid to her back, pulling her closer until her head was tucked below his chin and he could rest with his cheek against her silvery hair.

Eli could feel the soft rumble of his voice vibrate up from his chest as he chuckled quietly. “I’ve been told I have that effect on people,” he mumbled cheerily as his other hand began to gently brush through her hair, fingers carefully smoothing out any snarls as he stroked back and forth.

She hummed appreciatively, breathing deep and feeling eased by the familiar scent of rosemary and bergamot. “And who told you that?” she asked, teasingly.

“Hmm,” he pondered, running a dexterous finger along the side of her ear, causing goosebumps to prick along her arms. “I think it was you,” he mused slyly before his voice dipped lower into a growl and she felt his breath warm against her ear. “You remember, don’t you? That one night you told me I ravished you so thoroughly your soul left your body.”

He couldn’t see Eli’s exaggerated eye roll, but he could hear the grin in her voice as she responded. “I seem to remember that very same night you saying I exhausted you into delirium,” she teased, poking tenderly at his chest. “In the best way possible, of course,” Eli smirked.

Astarion sighed, the hand on her back drawing aimless circles as he murmured, “I do miss our nighttime trysts.”

Eli smiled, nuzzling into the crook of his neck and placing a light kiss there. “You know what they say. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or some such bullshit like that…”

“They sound awfully boring, whoever they are.” The vampire hummed low in his throat, kicking a leg over her waist and hooking his foot between her legs at her knees so that they were tangled together in a possessive embrace.

Eli just chuckled. They’d backed off the sexual aspects of their relationship for now, the both of them having their own flavors of hang ups that they needed to sort through. For Eli, that meant parsing through her strange, sometimes disturbing Urges which continued to insist that the lines between butchery and eroticism were blurred. Bloodplay was one thing, and that would likely remain a happy little staple in their titillating toolbox once they were ready to be that physically intimate again. But Eli had…other thoughts. Thoughts she wasn’t exactly comfortable with. Darker ones that bubbled up at extremely inopportune times and had her questioning whether she really wanted to shed light on her obscured past.

She breathed in Astarion’s scent, grounding herself in the now and pushing those musing away for another day. The desire between Eli and Astarion had not diminished, and on more than one occasion they had teetered precariously on the boundaries they’d set and wondering whether they should just say fuck it and…well…fuck. They’d always talk themselves down from the ledge, though, comfortable in the knwoeldge that when it did happen it would be earthshattering.

“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, love?” Astarion’s voice held a note of worry and Eli realized she’d been drifting off into the confines of her own brain again.

“Everything,” she sighed, frustrated with herself.

Astarion was silent for a moment, considering. The hand in her hair stilled while the one on her back pulled her in a bit tighter. “Is it…” he began, then paused a bit uncertainly, hesitant with his question. “Are you thinking about today? About…Gortash?”

He said the name so quietly that it would have been inaudible had they not been so closely pressed together. Eli wasn’t surprised about the question. She’d been acutely aware of how Astarion’s eyes never left her as she spoke with the newly crowned Archduke of Baldur’s Gate earlier that day. How he had discreetly positioned himself closely behind her, just off to her right. How he’d tensed, fingers ghosting near the hilt of a hidden dagger when Gortash said he’d always liked Eli. How his gaze darkened and his jaw tightened as Astarion sized the man up from across the hall before they left.

She knew this was a delicate situation for the vampire. Astarion despised showing any sort of vulnerability that could be construed as a reason for pity. Vulnerability, in general, was something he was still figuring out how to navigate after two centuries of living in an environment where anything and everything that could be used against him was twisted into a tool for subjugation and pain. Even with her, there were times when he wouldn’t let his walls come down, needing space to sort through his own internal barriers before he was ready to open up. Eli didn’t mind, and would give him all the time and space he needed. And bit by bit it became easier, for the both of them.

“That…yes,” she admitted, wanting to be truthful with him.

It wasn’t just Gortash, though. It was what he had told her, about Eli’s role in the whole Cult of the Absolute fraud. It was difficult for her to reconcile what she had apparently done with who she was now…the misery she’d set in motion. The lives she had destroyed. She shut her eyes and pressed closer to Astarion, seeking comfort in the cool of his skin against the inferno she felt inside.

He hugged her close, voicing a thought that had been gnawing away at his insides all day. “Were the two of you…close? Like us?”

The tentative, halting way in which he asked squeezed at her heart. As if he were bracing himself for something terrible, for something that would rip her away from him, just like everything else he’d ever given a damn about.

She thought for a while, mulling over the question. There was still so much that she didn’t know about who she was. Who she had been. She’d tell him what she could, though. He deserved that.

“I think we were. Close, I mean,” she clarified when she felt Astarion stiffen anxiously. “Not like us, though.”

She pulled her head back, out from under his chin, so she could see his face and meet his gaze with her own. Astarion’s eyes were round and distressed, the pinch between his brows furrowed and the lines of his face were tense. His eyes searched her own, desperately wanting to know who that man was to her while also fearing the answer.

Eli smiled warmly, bringing her hand up to brush one of his white curls behind his ear. His face softened slightly at her touch while the hand on her back clutched at her shirt as if to hold her here with him.

“There’s still so much darkness in my memory. But, there are things that have come back in flashes and fragments,” she explained, holding his gaze as her finger trailed to the edge of his eyebrow. “And while I’m not wholly sure what Gortash and I were to one another, I know it wasn’t like this.” Her hand came to rest on his cheek, thumb gently caressing his face near the corner of his mouth.

“Not like us,” she affirmed with a tenderness that allowed Astarion to relax, the stiffness easing out of him as the hint of a smile twitched at his lips. “He knew what happened to me,” she said softly, putting into words a thought that had been lingering at the back of her mind.

“He knew what happened to me, and he welcomed the person who did it into his confidence,” she said with a tinge of sadness to her voice. There was an ache of betrayal behind her words, and thought she didn’t fully understand everything her history with Gortash entailed, she understood this. “He stood by while I was unmade. While everything I was, the person he claims to care for, was brutalized and decimated.”

Eli’s words took on a cold edge, sharp as a shard of ice. Astarion listened intently, his breath caught at the back of his throat. He ached to pull her back into him, to wrap her up in his arms and shut the world out. Instead, he placed his hand on the back of her own and intertwined his fingers with hers, holding it against his cheek as Eli spoke.

“When I woke up on the nautiloid, I was nothing. Just the discarded scraps of whoever I had been. I had been thrown away. And nobody came looking for me.” She paused, her eyes flicking down in a brief moment of uncertainty.

There were some truths between them that had still gone unsaid. Truths that neither of them were ready to admit, and some that simply didn’t need words to be understood. Not this, though. This, she wanted him to hear.

“Since then, it’s been difficult not to think of myself as damaged goods. Something that was used up until it broke and was discarded.” She felt Astarion squeeze her hand and she looked back to him. There was a pang of recognition in his red eyes. “Everyone who I spoke to about my…urges, they all confirmed that there was something very wrong with me, even if they sympathized. Everyone except you.”

She paused, brushing her thumb once more against his face before she lifted her hand from him and took his own hand in hers. She pulled it to her lips, lightly kissing his knuckles while he stared at her, afraid to take his eyes off her for fear that she and this moment might evaporate if he did. He had stopped breathing, which luckily was not something he necessarily needed to do in order to maintain his existence.

Eli searched his face as Astarion waited for her to go on, breathless and just a tiny bit desperate to hear what she would say next. She wondered if he understood just how much it meant to her to have someone who didn’t see the wreck that she was when they looked at her. Someone who didn’t see a monster and only saw her, broken pieces be damned.

She thought he probably did…

“You were the only one who encouraged me to simply be whoever I was, darkness and all. I know at the time you were probably just looking to entertain yourself with whatever chaos and bloodshed I could cause,” she laughed and the expression on Astarion’s face melted into one of complete adoration.

“Guilty,” Astarion admitted with a laugh of his own. “And you haven’t disappointed,” he added softly, brushing a knuckle back up against her lips with delicate reverence.

She kissed at it, holding his tender gaze. “I don’t think you know how much that meant to me, though. And then later, when I was at my worst, you stayed by me and took care of me and you never stopped.”

Eli swallowed down the lump in her throat and blinked away the warmth that was threatening at her eyes.

“Nothing else could be like us, because no one has ever cared about me like you,” she concluded, smiling softly and whispering the words with the sincerity of a prayer.

Astarion stared at Eli for a long moment, emotions colliding and burning in his chest with so much vigor he was surprised his dead heart didn’t start beating again. He felt elated and awed by what she’d said. So much so that he was struck speechless and could only play her words over and over again in his mind, wanting to capture them perfectly and tuck them somewhere deep inside himself where no one could reach to steal them away. He couldn’t recall anyone ever saying anything to him that made him feel so cherished and significant. He traced the planes of her face with eyes that were beginning to wet as he tried to clear his throat and failed.

Eli watched Astarion carefully for a moment before her eyes widened in concern and she lifted a hand to him, carding it gently through his curled hair.

“Oh shit, did I break you?” she asked, only half joking as she stroked her hand through his hair.

The feel of it helped to calm him as a wide smile spread over his face, eyes half-lidded and looking at Eli like she was the most precious thing he’d ever seen.

“Come here you sweet, silly thing,” Astarion said, voice low and underpinned with a raw adoration that caused a flutter to take up in Eli’s chest.

He pulled her into a needy embrace; one hand placed softly in her hair as he tucked her head back under his chin, the other hand tightening around the small of her back to hold her close. He kissed the top of her head and breathed in slow, savoring her scent. She’d always smelled like wildflowers and the cool mist before a storm, like something exciting and freeing.

“Gods, you’re incredible,” he breathed, wondering what in the hells he had ever done in his irrelevant life to deserve her admiration. “I don’t think I’m ever going to want to let you go, my love.”

Eli wrapped her arms around him and for a moment she felt safe, secure and at peace.

“Then don’t,” she whispered against him.

They stayed wrapped up in one another until dawn, thankful to have one more day and hopeful for so many more.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldur’s gate iii #bg3 spoilers #baldurs gate 3 #astarion #astarion bg3 #bg3 astarion #astarion fanfic #bg3 fanfiction #astarion fanfiction #bg3 fanfic #astarion x mc #astarion x durge #astarion x tav #astarion x dark urge #astarion romance #soft astarion #sweet astarion #durgestarion #durgetash

[djs-sideblog-for-pog-trains]

so. um. @mean-scarlet-deceiver's post about thomas and henry's relationship has been living in my brain rent free for the past month and i have been turning over a scene for just as long.

so. i tried to write it. i hope you don't mind, jobey. and also you're right. they are Hard to get right. if i had to put an era on this i'd call it BG (Before Gordon).

about 1.5k, full fic under the cut

--- --- ---

Thomas keeps shooting glances at the sheds as he bustles around the yard.

It… the hired help from the other railway, the engines who are slightly too full of themselves for Thomas’ liking (and he’s made sure to let them know as such) have been talking loudly all morning, as they were getting ready to take their trains, about… the new engine.

Henry. Even if he couldn’t have remembered Henry’s name, the other two have been saying it loudly enough to carry around the yard that Thomas certainly has the picture now. And… Thomas’ lip curls as he hears their newest comment as he goes past.

“Hey!” he calls, boiling over, and the two hired engines look at him. “It’s 9am already. Are you going to actually go take your trains, or are you just going to sit and preen all day?”

“What would you know, little Thomas?” one of them calls back, all smarmy and smug. Thomas’ lip curls even more into a full on frown. Eugh. Tender engines.

“About running a railway on time?” Thomas snaps back. “Clearly more than you! Are you waiting for Sir Topham Hatt to personally invite you, or?”

They huff and sneer and pout at him, but they do still steam off one by one. However, they each shoot Henry a knowing and cruel side-eye as they go that makes Thomas bristle, despite himself.

Henry is still in his berth in the sheds. Well, he’s half-in, half-out. He only seemed to have made it so far before he… stopped. And he’s been going all sorts of shades of red as the others’ gossip had gotten louder and louder as he waited for his driver to return with an engineer of some sort.

Henry isn’t looking at Thomas now, but his eyes had snapped to the tank engine when Thomas had spoken up. He’s instead closed his eyes, puffed out his cheeks, and seems to be trying – and trying hard – to… to what? To move?

Thomas tries not to stare, as he moves trucks into the siding they’re expected to be found in. Why is he trying so hard?

Eventually, Henry does actually move – but he… Thomas frowns again. Henry moves backwards, back into the shed. The wheesh Henry lets out as he comes to a halt is limp and weak.

Henry has been here, what, all of a month, maybe two at this point. Thomas hasn’t heard… many kind things, actually, so far, which is weird because look at him. Henry’s huge – Henry’s the biggest engine Thomas has ever seen, and he’s surely powerful to boot.

But Henry… Well, Edward said that Henry is sick, and sick often.

“Why?” Thomas had asked, as they had approached the shed. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Thomas,” Edward had reprimanded, and that’s when Thomas had realised Henry was in earshot, and clearly trying to pretend he wasn’t.

And that had been that.

Thomas had seen Sir Topham Hatt come out of his office at the station to watch Henry’s comings and goings, and more often than not with a stormy expression on his face. And Thomas didn’t get that either. Problems get the stormy expression. Troublemakers get the stormy expressions (Thomas would know). And Henry seems… too…

Thomas biffs his truck ahead of him as he turns his thoughts over.

Too… quiet? Too wallpaper? Too chameleon? Too…?

He snorts to himself. Whatever Henry is, he’s too much of it. And certainly too much of it to be a troublemaker, not like those mainline engines. It’s not like Thomas has gotten to know Henry yet, and it’s not like Henry has given him the opportunity to, either: but Thomas doesn’t get the impression Henry wants to be trouble. But he has to be… there has to be something wrong here, otherwise the Fat Controller wouldn’t be so upset.

Thomas hears a sniff from behind him as he backs down his stretch of track, and realises it’s come from the sheds.

And Thomas sighs quietly. …Then again, if nothing was wrong, Henry wouldn’t be so upset either.

“Those two,” Thomas says, before he can think, and Henry has gone absolutely silent, eyes flicking over to Thomas as Thomas pauses on a nearby siding for just a moment. “Bloody wankers, the pair of them.”

The silence holds for another second or two, before Thomas is rewarded with a shaky laugh.

“…I noticed,” says Henry.

“All those mainline tossers, really,” Thomas continues, and he keeps talking even as his work takes him all around the yard, speaking up so Henry can still hear him. “I almost wish the Fat Controller wouldn’t hire them. Sure, we need more wheels on rails, but they don’t seem to know a blazing thing about this railway.”

Henry – in the shadow of the shed – purses his lips, before he lets out another sigh, another limp wheesh of steam.

“I would hardly say I do, either,” he says miserably.

Thomas frowns, and comes to a halt a little too sharply with a big woosh of steam.

“Of course you do,” he replies, indignant. Henry’s a big engine, he should- why would he say that?  Sure, Henry hasn’t been here long, but he’s a big engine, he should know plenty. “More than them, anyway.”

Henry sighs. He doesn’t argue, but Thomas’ fire flickers in annoyance as he can read of Henry’s face that Henry doesn’t agree either.

“I mean, you wouldn’t have been bought if-”

“Don’t.”

Thomas’ mouth hangs open for a second, before he closes it, blinks, and glances at Henry.

Henry looks even more upset. Great job, Thomas.

“I’m just saying-”

“Well, don’t,” Henry cuts him off again, sounding grumpier. And he’s gone from miserable to grumpy – that’s a win in Thomas’ book. “I’m particularly not in the mood to hear how I’d be more useful as a tin can.”

“The only tin cans around here are those self-important mainland pricks,” Thomas shoots back, and Henry side-eyes him – suspicious. “I’m not convinced they know what a timetable is, let alone how to read one. What kind of engine hangs around in the sheds when there’s work to… be…?”

Thomas trails off, and Henry… actually laughs. It’s tired and it’s bitter, but it’s a real laugh and it’s better than miserable.

“…Well, I want to assume you’re going to go work. When you can.”

“Optimism,” Henry says dryly. “I admire that in an engine.”

Thomas scrunches up his face. “I don’t understand you,” he says bluntly, in a way he’s sure Edward would scold him for if he was with them. “You’re miserable in the sheds, you’re miserable out on the line, you’re miserable doing nothing and you’re miserable pulling trains.”

Henry stares at Thomas for a moment, before his eyes flick away.

“If I could get out of this yard and actually pull trains, I’d do it in a heartbeat,” Thomas says, far more dreamily than he’ meant to, and he cringes a little, chuffing out of where he can see Henry’s face, because he doesn’t need to hear an earful about it from another big engine.

“…You’re small,” Henry says, slowly, not accusatorily nor really condescendingly. He sounds more …confused than anything. “…And you’re useful, here.”

“And?” Thomas snaps back, defensive. “I could be useful anywhere.”

Henry’s silent for another moment, like he’s really chewing that statement over.

Then, eventually, he surprises Thomas by saying, “…I suppose you would be better than those two.”

And Thomas lets out a sharp bark of laughter, shooting Henry a grin as he goes by, and punctuating it with a hoot and a whistle – delighted. The enthusiasm makes Henry blink, before slowly, a smile of his own spreads across his face; one that sharpens to match Thomas’.

“You’re most certainly right! And besides. You let them get to you, you let them win,” Thomas agrees. “And they’re far too useless for that.”

Henry laughs again. Thomas lets out another peep-peep and a woosh of steam of his own, pleased to have earnt it. Footsteps crunch over the gravel of the yard, and Thomas spots Henry’s driver returning with a couple of engineers in tow before Henry does, and replies to their hellos as he bustles past.

“Hello, lad,” Henry’s driver says to Henry, patting his side. “We’ll have you right as rain in no-time, alright?"

Henry sighs again, but does actually smile back at his driver.

His driver blinks in fond surprise as the engineers get to work finding the newest problem. “You’re in good spirits, all of a sudden.” Then, he glances at Thomas as the tank engine goes past. “Making friends?”

“More so finding the only engine in this yard with a thought in his smokebox, it seems,” Henry says dryly, loud enough for Thomas to hear, and that makes Thomas snort in amusement.

He does call back, “Hey, now, be nice to Edward!”

And the engineers and Henry’s driver alike seem relieved when the two engines laugh together.

Thomas watches them work to get Henry’s steam up, and Henry’s finally pulling out of the sheds a good half-hour later. Thomas whistles goodbye as Henry chuffs away.

He smiles with the satisfaction of a job well done when Henry, completely of his own volition, whistles a goodbye in return as he disappears off down the line.

Then, Thomas returns to his trucks, and gives them a good biff once more, ignoring how this time, they really shriek. He – and Henry, he imagines – can’t wait for those mainlanders’ contracts to run out.

#ttte #thomas the tank engine #ttte henry #ttte thomas #ttte fic #dj's writing #i never realised how much i rely on nodding as gestural filler in my writing until im writing engines who cant nod #i hope a) you don't mind and b) this is good #i wanted to draw this originally but it eluded me badly #i dont know if Henry would actually be that forthcoming about his self-depricating comments but ALSO he's very miserable #and probably is trying to make Thomas leave him alone via making him uncomfortable. this however does not work #mostly bc thomas doesn't believe in pity parties. unless they're for himself. #excuse the tag ramble. im thinking about them hard

[daytaker]

NightBringer Satan is a Gift.

I understand everyone has their own opinions on how good/not good NB is as a game or a story or whatever, but in my opinion, Satan's characterization is soooo enhanced by it. I know that this isn't an opinion that everyone shares, but to me, Satan felt emotionally artificial sometimes in the original game (more on that below).* He felt kind of awkward and like he wanted to connect with MC but something was blocking the kind of connection they develop with some of the other brothers. (Disclaimer: I've only done season 1 of OG, so I can't speak to how he's characterized later on. I know, I know, shame. But I'm trying my best.) Getting to see what Satan is like when he doesn't have any control over his emotions makes the stiffness and artificiality make more sense to me, and they become admirable because we get to see just how hard it is for him to get everything under control.

I think they did a really good job with the pacing of his development in NB too. Satan in Lesson 1 and Satan in Lesson 19 are different, but there isn't a moment where he suddenly starts controlling his emotions better. I think there's a lot going on behind the scenes with him as far as his emotional growth and self control are concerned.

Also let's not forget some very important things about Satan that make him, IMO, one of the most interesting characters to work with as a writer:

Satan was never an angel; he had no fall from grace.

Satan was created from Lucifer's wrath---he is literally the product of trauma and self-mutilation.

Satan is significantly younger than his brothers.

He spent the first year of his life more or less trapped in a castle with his deeply emotionally wounded brothers.

He has a deep resentment towards Lucifer that sometimes defies reason---he wishes he didn't dedicate so much of his time and energy to him, but it's basically a compulsion.

He hates his deep association with Lucifer, and he hates that he has a lot in common with him.

And these lead me to some headcanons that live rent-free in my brain every day of my life.

Satan sees himself as a reminder of the Great Celestial War and everything his brothers lost in it, including Lilith.

He is divine retribution against Lucifer for his failure, for leading his brothers to failure, for letting his sister die.

He acts as a counterbalance to Lucifer's pride by bearing the weight of the shame that Lucifer can't fully accept now that he is the Avatar of Pride. Even if Lucifer pushes it out of his mind, Satan never forgets that he failed in the worst way possible.

His biggest aspiration is to become a full and complete person outside of any association he has with Lucifer. He feels like some sort of parasitic tumor that exists only in opposition to his brother, and he wants desperately to escape that role that he feels he was born into.

Anyway, Satan is great, hail Satan, all that good stuff. Did you know I have a lot of thoughts and opinions about Satan? I know, shocking. For more of my takes here's my fic about him (on AO3).

*I think Satan almost metaphorically represents certain elements of autism---emotions that don't come out the way you intend, masking and its limitations, hyperfixations that are barely under control. In Fandom Discourse(TM) there's sometimes a level of focus on more 'cutesy' autistic traits that we find endearing in characters, like social obliviousness and gleefully indulged hyperfixations. But emotional control, emotional masking, emotional seepage, emotional artificiality---these are also real and messy and often times they aren't cute and they're uncomfortable to see in yourself or in someone else. I really don't like diagnosing characters so I'm not about to claim Satan "is" autistic, but as someone who has been called essentially 'spectrum adjacent' by doctors, I relate to the awkwardness and the desire to appear normal despite knowing you're not and emotions spilling out in ugly ways---um. That got really long and personal.

#satan is angry and he has every right to be #I hope this isn't going to make anybody unhappy or uncomfy #these are just my takes #I love him #I love all of them #I honestly love the games too #I don't mind that they are silly #satan #lucifer #obey me #obey me swd #obey me satan #obey me lucifer #obey me lore #obey me headcanons #obey me hcs #obey me nightbringer #omswd #dthc #hcs #text post #satan thoughts

[running-with-the-feels]

saw a post on twitter about how in mkx kuai liang bowed to hanzo the japanese way and prepared tea in the japanese way as well as the utmost sign of respect what are your thoughts 🎤‼️

oooooooo my god do I have thoughts

Basically, that scene is my roman empire, and it lives in my brain Rent Free.

I think that Kuai Liang was just going out of his way to make Hanzo as comfortable as possible. Like he knows where they are, he knows how hard being here must be for Hanzo given what the Lin Kuei did so he's doing literally anything he can think of to say "I am not a threat, please hear me out"

I think he's also trying to soften the blow as much as possible, like there's no way to make telling Hanzo about the truth of what Quan Chi did not hurt, but Kuai Liang is trying so hard not to be cruel about it.

So he tries to show Hanzo by bowing the japanese way and preparing the tea in the japanese way that he wants this to be a chance to communicate, that he respects the pyromancer and his clan enough to learn at least part of their customs so that Hanzo feels a little bit less like he's just walked into a trap.

And the thing is, it works! You can see that even tho Hanzo is doubtful and suspicious of wtf is going on (and honestly that is a very fair reaction to the situation), he's listening to Kuai Liang. He's trying to hear the guy out!

It's also pretty clear that Kuai Liang is comfortable with the motions of preparing the tea, like there's no hesitation or fumbling (which might just be bc the game designers didn't want to deal with animating that but I choose to read into it anyways) so its obvious that he practiced this. He wanted to get it right!

And I just can't help but wonder what else Kuai Liang had in place to try and ease communication between them, to try and make Hanzo more comfortable. Like, did he find any Shirai Ryu items that had been taken as trophies and intend to return them (bc lbr, the Lin Kuei def took trophies)? Was he going to offer to let Hanzo stay the night? Like what was the rest of his plan had Frost not intervened?

Like Kuai Liang went so far out of his way to show Hanzo "I mean you no harm, I just want to talk" in the most polite and respectful way he could and Hanzo sees that! It's why he's so confused during the whole interaction bc to him it doesn't make sense. Kuai Liang should, rightfully, hate him.

And, just a side note, I don't think Hanzo ever blamed Kuai Liang for trying to kill him that one time. Like, Hanzo wasn't gonna let him, but he knows that he killed Kuai Liang's brother, so I think he understands why Kuai Liang hates him so much. It's why (as I read into it, this isn't confirmed) he doesn't kill the cryomancer in the mkx blood ties comics, and instead just leaves him there to bleed to death (dick move tho) bc he doesn't want to kill him. He just wants their feud to stop, bc he doesn't have any quarrel with Kuai Liang.

He might not like the Lin Kuei, but the ones responsible for what happened to him are dead, and by now I think he'd have figured out that Kuai Liang wasn't involved. So he's not trying to be the guy's best friend, but part of him doesn't want to be his enemy any more (I have so many thoughts about that whole interaction too, like that is my second Roman Empire)

But, back to the topic at hand:

The thing is, no one would have expected Kuai Liang to do all that. No one would have ever expected him to try so hard or be so kind about it. He now has proof that Hanzo did the very thing he's been accused of for years, he killed Bi-Han unjustly. Kuai Liang would have been well within his rights to simply send Hanzo that information some other way, without ever facing him.

Hell, he'd be pretty justified in just killing Hanzo over it bc all of these characters seem to agree that vengeance and justice are about the same thing (I mean, canon is slightly more nuanced than that, but that's the general gist of it).

And i think Hanzo knows that, and a part of him almost wants Kuai Liang to do it after he finds out.

but he doesn't

Instead, Kuai Liang offers him an alliance and an apology for what the Lin Kuei did (which, btw, I know we see real regret from Hanzo in that same scene but he does owe Kuai Liang an actual apology with actual words) and lets their feud end. Kuai Liang takes informatoon that would drive anyone else mad with rage and grief (*cough* Hanzo *cough*) and instead chooses to be kind.

I really wonder what that scene would have looked like if Frost hadn't interrupted, if she had trusted Kuai Liang to make the right choice and just let it happen.

How would that change their relationship and its development?

How would Kuai Liang have broken the news?

What else had he planned to say and would Hanzo have listened?

Roman empire guys, roman empire

#kuai liang #hanzo hasashi #mortal kombat x #mortal kombat #subscorp

[atamascolily]

[CW: Extreme puppet violence, including stabbing, decapitation, and blood.]

This scene from Bewitching Melody of the West lives rent-free inside my brain and encapsulates everything I love about Thunderbolt Fantasy in a nutshell (high praise indeed considering Lin Xue Ya is not even in this movie!). Not only is it an incredible example of bard vs. bard musical combat, it's also a great action sequence set to a kick-ass song, as well as a profound character moment. And while know this would be terrible for any instrument IRL, I have a special fondness for any fight where a magical guqin is used for bashing damage.

For additional context, Mu Tian Ming, the woman challenging our red-headed hero Lang Wu Yao (aka T.M. Revolution's puppet-sona) is the one person in his life thus far who was ever unequivocally kind to him, and the song she picked for their duel to the death is the one that Lang's mother taught him when he was a child--a song she knows Lang will be able to play in perfect harmony with her. Talk about a power move!

(I'm pretty sure I shipped them before this, but there's no question this scene is what cemented it, because hot damn.)

It's too bad a cleaned-up track of this duet was never released, because the solo version, while still epic, is just not the same.

Bewitching Melody of the West is what sold me on Lang as a character--I thought he was interesting in S2, but he was so blunt and brusque it was hard for me to like him. Learning his backstory explained a lot about why he's Like That and made me much more sympathetic. It also doesn't hurt that I like his outfit and design in this movie better than his original costume (although the fact that he gets a magical girl transformation had me in stitches).

As for Mu Tian Ming, she is awesome, and I will be forever pissed off at what happened to her in S3. I know exactly why Urobuchi did it, and why he did it the way he did it, but sidelining one of the only female characters solely for manpain is infuriating and I resent it like hell. It's probably too much to hope that later seasons will provide a fix-it, but I live in hope.

#thunderbolt fantasy #wuxia fantasy puppet epic #lang wu yao #mu tian ming #Youtube

[wildmelon]

hey lush how r u? soo i know you’ve spoken b4 abt ur favourite interactive fictions but how would you rank the ones you’ve read 1-5?

i’m a bigbig wayhaven girl but i’m also currently on chp7 of a tale of crowns (which i’m liking so far), and i LOVED project hadea and other wips like chop shop+infamous,, i also have mind blind on my wait list (i started a while back but couldn’t get into it) as well as when twilight strikes…

no pressure to answer i just need to speak on it😓

hiiiiii tysm for asking! been way too long since i geeked out about IF... ooof a top 5 is soooo hard. im gonna leave out wayhaven bc DUH we all love wayhaven but it'd probably take the #2 spot.

a tale of crowns is my all time favorite. i'm completely obsesed with the worldbuilding, the mc, and XELEF AHHHHH (who r u romancing ???)

shepherds of haven is SO dear to me. the world is just so expansive and alive and it's so thorough, it has such RPG vibes. particular blade & chase simp :D

throne of ashes changed my brain chemistry tbh... ruben's route is the only complete one currently but im completely head over heels in love with him. i love how it deals with trauma and healing. & the bonus content from the author's patreon lives in my head rent free.

the exile should be studied bc the impact it's had on me relative to the number of chapters it has so far... love love love the angst, familial drama, and mc backstory. nikke slut <3

the soul stone war is one of the earliest i read and it just makes me feel warm and cozy, i just love the romance and friendships and it'll always be a comfort IF for me.

honorable mentions to mind blind, the bastard of camelot, superstition, & fallen hero <3

i'd love to know your top 5 too!!!! i used to be a lot more tuned in to the WIP scene than i currently am, so i haven't played project hadea or chop shop & it's been a while since i played when twilight strikes but i rly enjoyed it, infamous is obv AMAZING as well. mind blind will likely be published in full soon, give it another try then if u want!! i kinda did it dirty here but it really does live rent-free in my head, my faves are very affected by nostalgia :,)

#ask #magdalune #interactive fiction #interactive fiction recs

[blueberryspyder]

Alright, finally finished drawing Gale! This is based off this wonderful screenshot that’s been living rent free in my brain ever since I saw it ❤️

I love this wizard so much, I plan to draw him a lot

(Also I KNOW his left eye is way too far up, please ignore it I’m begging you)

#my art #blueberry doodles #traditional art #pencil drawing #art #Gale #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #baldurs gate gale #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 gale #baldurs gate #bg3 #I just love him so much #he’s so baby girl #he’s so tender and sweet and I just want to kiss his face

[coffeebanana]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤️

Thanks for the ask @kasienda (and @valiantlyjollynightmare and the anon who also sent me this yesterday)!!

Okay so like. I'm VERY bad at choosing favourites and also my list changes around all the time. Only the first two have long-term positions on the list and then I'm mostly picking three at random based on my current vibes 😂. But vibes are important so!

Say Something - This one is an easy choice because I've spent soooo much time with it and I'm such a perfectionist about it (or well, as close to being a perfectionist as I ever get), plus it has so many of my favourite tropes and all the hurt/comfort!! And I'm very proud of the prose in this one too!

I Don't Believe In Umbrellas - This was my first Marigami fic so I think it will always be special to me haha. And it was fun coming up with all the details for this AU and then weaving it all together!

We Don't Need Roses - This fic was chosen for the vibes. It's another Marigami AU and I also love the worldbuilding I did for this one as well as the prose and the dash of angst and akjbfskdjb it's just so GAY it makes me happy.

Happier - I'll be honest, if I hadn't gotten these asks yesterday this wouldn't be on the list 😂. And it's a funny choice seeing as it's a WIP I've only posted one chapter of and that was like a year and a half ago kajfkjsbf. BUT. I really like the way I wrote that one chapter and I sporadically go back to this fic like "okay, NOW i'm going to finish it" but then it keeps getting bumped for other projects asjfbdkjd. Except this week I opened it again and I SWEAR I'm going to work on it. I'm excited to! I'm prioritizing it ahaha. So right now it's high on the "fics I'm excited about" list and that roughly translates to favourites.

Okay I'm doing something a little unconventional for this answer and choosing something I haven't actualy written yet. (Details about the project in the tumblr post I linked haha. And pfft no this is not just so I can avoid choosing another fic. Not at aaaaall). But I think this fic should count because I know if I ever do get around to writing it then I think it WILL end up as one of my favourites. It's got all the fun angst I love!! And ladrien!! Also it's fully outlined and there are some scenes I'm SO SO excited about writing...although I've really only written like one and a bit scenes so far ahaha. And I don't think I'm going to be able to focus on this one until I finish a couple other things, but I expect this will be the next longfic 👀. (Or maybe it'll just live rent-free in my brain for the rest of eternity, but it still deserves acknowledgement 😂)

And there's my list! Thanks again for the asks! 💜

#ask response #kasienda #valiantlyjollynightmare #anonymous #coffeebanana fics #miraculous ladybug #love square #marigami #adrigaminette

[raccoonfallsharder]

let me love your OCs

masterlist

to request a doodle, read and reblog this post. (currently CLOSED) rocket art | my OCs | current queue | main masterlist

petra quill, moon, rose, juno, j’me, juno again ♡

doodle requests are currently CLOSED.

i reserve the right to choose & reorganize my queue based on wherever inspiration strikes (it's not that i don't like your OC ~ it's just that my creativity is a fickle thing). i do tend to most enjoy drawing humanoid femmes with reckless hair in the gotg fandom, so they will probably get priority.

avery, jolie, fleuret, chérie | ken, brita, star, akira | ember, mori, magril, dori

Akira (@bakaotakulife) look at this shiny blue-haired badass. she has such an interesting backstory and you'll want to follow her creator to find out more about what happens next, i'm just saying.

Avery Malloli (@evolvingchaoswitch) is a fuckin badass bar-owner with sexy arm-muscles and tattoos and both i and jolie have crushes on them.

Brita (@pretty-chips) is such a pure, delightfully fun character with record-store-clerk vibes. Thank you for letting me draw her. She is a glowing sunbeam-soul. ♡ another Brita wearing a terran t-shirt gifted to her by my oc, Jolie Spinner

Chérie (Cherry) (@aliasrocket) I have a crush. 10/10 would attempt to flirt with (badly). Thank you so much for creating her and letting me doodle her! Dori (@funkydancingdinosaur ) i have deeply loved having the chance to draw and paint tadoria. they are so rad and i love their bioluminescent fucken eyes. i may end up having to draw them again at some point just to play with those eyes again. so fuckin cool

Ember (@thirteens-lucky-tardis) this girl is a fucking dragon. she’s got such interesting background lore and she’s cool as fuck. i vow i will, someday, draw her wings. truly a rich and interesting oc with great interactions with rocket! thank you gif letting me doodle her!

Fleuret (@elegant-fleuret) is my personal caffeine deity. i now pray to her for the ability to scrape myself out of bed and for deliverance from coffee crashes. she is also the dj of knowhere which is possibly the coolest fucking job in the universe and i would like to be her friend.

J'me (@caesarhamato22) is a badass babe and i loved getting to try some new things and make up some guns. plus making something for jay is like. making an offering to a god. such a fucken honor

Jolie (Window Across the Galaxy) - my gremlin child. just some scritchy-scratchy character concepts. feel free not to look if you want to imagine Jo in your own way. ♡ another series of low-rent jolies ♡ the "real" Jolie doodle - refined, finished, && in color ♡ a favorite scene of Jolie & Rocket (Chapter IV. Got There First.) ♡ i just wanted to add other folks' beautiful art of jolie here too. i am so grateful for these treasures ♡♡

very first portrait of jolie by @raccoonmybeloved ~ so fucking cute i died

sims of jo by @evolvingchaoswitch ~ particularly love her paint-spattered outfit

an absolutely drool-worthy nsfw of rocket & jolie by @lazarel-3000 that permanently has altered my brain chemistry and lives in my mind forever ♡♡♡

Juno (@lazarel-3000) is one of my favorite OCs ever. she is everything. i want to be her && i want to date her (unfortunately she only has eyes for rocket). ♡ a rough little juno sketch because i just love her that much (+ it was a birthday thing!) ♡ another juno [NSFW], covered in sparklies, per one of my fave scenes from The All of You ♡ my favorite juno so far ~ a lineless portrait. she's so fuckin gorgeous and i cannot get enough of her!

Ken (@thismonthshyperfixation) ken is a very rad-as-hell woodworker who meets pete on terra. they go on a space-road-trip to knowhere so ken can meet rocket. they have very cool hair and tattoos and i wanna hang out with them and talk about making stuff

Magril (@rxin3akamallory) i have so enjoyed getting to know magril over the months that rxin3 has been patiently waiting for this doodle. she's such a clever, resourceful, resilient little sweetheart, an opossum, and a halfworld refugee who escaped via a ravager ship. plus her eye is a camera?? i love her!!

Moon (@glow-autumz) with Rose (see below). Thank you for letting me draw these two lovelies. You know I headcanon them as interdimensional besties ♡ ♡ another Moon (@glow-autumz) Thank you again for letting me illustrate some of Moon's rad powers. i am OBSESSED. I appreciate so much you bringing her to life! ♡ a Moon-Mermaid (@glow-autumz) because she has captured my imagination. Thank you for letting me continue to doodle your amazing, gravity-defying, gorgeous-haired girl!

Mori (@blueberrysquire) this adorable badass is an alien space psychologist who focuses on shepherding folks across the threshold of life and death. they live incredibly long and their lore is rad as fuck. i took way too long to draw this character but they are an absolute delight and you should read more about them!

Petra Quill [NSFW] (@hibatasblog) so this version of peter is rad as hell and i wanted to draw them in their seductive shi'ar lingerie. petra quill is the darling version of peter quill who features large in all of this author's rocket x fanfiction and i love them. this particular sequence is from casino royale and you should check them out on ao3!

Rose (@love-for-faeries-go-burrrr ) & Moon (see above) Thank you for letting me draw these two lovelies. You know I headcanon them as interdimensional besties ♡ ♡ Another Rose (@love-for-faeries-go-burrrr) because I love her so, so much. aka rose gets her wings back

Star (@cleo-is-babygirl) is a pure fluffy little sundrop and a brilliant self-taught medic/surgeon. she is also the first tanuki/anthropomorphic animal i have drawn other than rocket so i was very nervous but i did my best. thank you for letting me try something new and expand my experience, friend!

#let me love them #other people's characters #i just love drawing pretty girls #gotg oc #rocket x oc #original character #space princess #let me love your ocs ♡rfh #gotg fanart #rocket raccoon fanfiction #gotg fanfiction #guardians of the galaxy #reader insert #rocket racoon x reader #fan art #rfh masterlist #rfh art

[fourraccoonsinacoat]

Head Full of Ghosts

Pairing: Astarion x Dark Urge

Summary: Takes place during the events of Baldur's Gate 3 and explores the romance between Astarion and the Dark Urge, as well as the friendships and relationships she has with her companions. Plus, everyone gives shit to Gale about his cooking. Tags: Slow Burn, Angst, Pining, Humor, Violence, Friends to Lovers, Developing Friendships, Developing Romance, Spoilers for the Dark Urge and BG3 in general, Dark Urge as Original Female Character Rating: Mature (Will eventually be Explicit, just not there yet.) Current Chapter Count: 3/? Read on AO3 (Will post chapters to Tumblr, as well.) Current Word Count: 13,050

Author Notes: Hello, Tumblr! Longtime lurker, first time poster. BG3 has reignited my love for writing fanfic - I think it's legit been over seven years since I've written a fic. The dry spell has now been broken. BG3 has grabbed me by the throat and pulled me back in and damn, if I'm not enjoying the hell out of it. I've got an ongoing fic on AO3, so I figured why not officially join Tumblr and dive headfirst into the fandom? Should anyone read my silly fic, I dearly hope you enjoy it. All these characters currently live in my head rent free.

Chapter 1: Misfits

The toll house burned as Karlach whooped, exacting rage and fury on everything within the abandoned building. Her glee might have been infectious if it hadn’t been so damn dangerous.

Luckily, Eli and her merry band of misfits had gotten clear of the structure before the worst of the fires caught. They now stood in the middle of the dirt cart path that led to the toll house entryway, watching the scene unfold in front of them with the same morbid curiosity with which townsfolk might watch a public hanging.

Wyll rubbed the back of his neck, cringing slightly as the loud and unmistakable crash of something glass-made reverberated from within the inferno.

“Maybe…” he started hesitantly, then cleared his throat. “Maybe someone should stop her?”  

Honestly, Wyll was too pure for their group of maladjusted headcases. Between being forcibly inducted as Emerald Grove’s newest mediator, and trying to figure out just what in the nine hells was going on with the illithid tadpoles in their brains, Eli had not had much time to get to know Wyll. Like her, he was a warlock, though he was being rather cagey about who or what his patron was. She guessed it had something to do with his contract, and it wasn’t as if she had much room to judge.

Eli couldn’t even remember who the hell her patron was. That knowledge was a gaping black hole in her ruptured memory. Sometimes, late at night, in the stifling silence when the chaos of the day had finally died down, she’d try to recall…anything. Anything about her past life beyond the images of blood, death and rot that swirled in her mind. She was never successful, and her attempts usually ended in a roiling headache. The holes in her brain were deep, dark and remained unknown.    

“These days I’m trying to avoid situations that end with me burnt to ash,” Astarion’s snark brought Eli back to the here and now. “But if you’re confident in your ability to be fire retardant, then by all means,” he finished the thought by motioning towards the building with a bit of a flourish.

The building was now practically engulfed in flames so bright that it was difficult to look at. She was pretty sure she could hear the roof caving in. Eli pinched the bridge of her nose and shut her eyes, the light and sound of it all was causing her already throbbing headache to grow and fester behind her eyes.

“Stop trying to suck the joy out of things, Wyll,” Eli said, with a bit more bite than she had intended.

She couldn’t see it, but she heard the eye roll in his response. “Fine. Far be it from me to deny someone their little moments of destructive bliss.”  

Eli huffed in response and felt a presence move up next to her.

“Another headache?” Shadowheart’s voice wasn’t quite concerned, but it did have a hint of guarded interest, and for Shadowheart that was just as good.

“Think I’m going on day three now,” Eli responded with a groan. She let her hand drop from her face and opened her eyes, blinking back against the influx of light.

No one spoke it out loud, but they all knew the significance of that statement. Three days ago, Eli had woke in the middle of the night to discover Alfira, a kind and gentle tiefling bard, brutalized and dead…by Eli’s own hands. The shame, guilt and confusion from that night was still a gaping and painful wound within. Alfira was a constant and haunting presence, a reminder that her mind and body were not her own. She could recall flashes of memory from that night, and she desperately wished that was not the case.

The fear in Alfira’s eyes was emblazoned upon her brain and it followed her into her dreams. She was not sleeping well, if at all. And the terror that she would once again wake up to find she’d torn open another of her companions, one of her friends…it was enough to fill her nights with nauseating dread.      

“Maybe Gale can cook up a sleeping potion for you when we get back to camp,” Shadowheart suggested with more softness in her voice than Eli was used to. “I’m sure your penchant for rummaging through our wares until all hours of the morning isn’t helping things,” she chided a bit more coolly.

Eli gave her a non-committal half smile. She’d taken to perusing their camp’s growing hoard of books during her sleepless nights. Reading kept her mind busy, and off of other darker thoughts that stalked her steps.    

“Given the unholy smells being extruded by Gale’s cookpot the other night, I’m not sure I’d trust him to brew a sleeping potion someone is expected to wake up from,” Astarion said cheerily, stepping up to Eli’s other side opposite Shadowheart. “Besides, there’s nothing wrong with a little extracurricular nighttime activity.”

The suggestive smirk he gave Eli caused the pit of her stomach to tighten.

“Yes, because reading is so titillating,” she deadpanned back at him. Astarion was a shameless flirt, and Eli wasn’t in a mood to deal with him while her head was splitting open from the inside out.

Astarion, however, was not dissuaded.

“Darling, it’s not my fault if you choose a boring activity.” He emphasized the word ‘boring’ and Eli knew exactly where this was going before they even got there.

He leaned in closer and she caught the faint scent of spice and rosemary that always lingered in the space where he’d been. Nine hells, why did she know that?

“You know I’m only a few tents away if you ever want to try a more stimulating activity,” he purred. A small shiver ran up her spine as she felt the breath from his words against her neck.

A derisive snort came from Eli’s other side. “Really, Astarion, were you never taught not to play with your food?” Shadowheart said with the hint of a smirk, which turned into a full grin when Eli shot her a dark glare.

Eli suddenly felt very aware of a certain spot on her neck as she looked back to Astarion, whose red eyes had been lingering there before they flicked back up to her face. She met his gaze and thought she saw something hungry flash across his expression before he looked to Shadowheart.

“Call it an appetizer,” Astarion replied in that smooth and sultry voice that danced so effortlessly from his lips. “Something to get the blood pumping before the main course.”

Eli was starting to feel something akin to what a rabbit may feel when being circled by wolves. Astarion had inched closer to her as he spoke and teased, pushing into her personal space with bravado and squaring up to her like an animal on the prowl. Eli had experienced this behavior from him before, and she hated it. Not because of any issues with personal boundaries - she didn’t even know if she had issues with personal boundaries, considering how full of holes her memory was. No, she hated it because of how her body responded. And she doubted it was the sort of response Astarion was looking for.

All of his bravado, his confidence, how sure of himself he seemed when he pressed near to her, playing his games. It triggered an anger in her she didn’t recognize. A cruel and dominating rage that wanted nothing more than to grab him by the throat and force him to his knees, demanding respect. She was no rabbit fearful of wolves, no plaything for him to tease. She’d flay him sternum to navel for his insolence.

“Stop,” Eli muttered, moreso to herself than to Astarion.

Her head was pounding as she tried to shove those unwanted and vicious thoughts back down into the unknown void of herself. She took a tentative step backwards and nearly collided with Shadowheart, who managed to step quickly out of the way. Eli felt a hand on her shoulder and reflexively flinched away, internally trying to wrest herself from the cloying vile madness that was building in her brain.

“Sorry,” Eli heard Shadowheart say.

Glancing to Shadowheart, Eli saw she had her hands raised in a conciliatory gesture. Likely, Shadowheart had reached out to try and steady Eli. The problem was, Eli didn’t trust herself when her mind went red and hazy.

She didn’t want anyone touching her in those moments. She didn’t want anyone ending up like Alfira…

“That’s enough of that,” Wyll’s strong voice held a very clear note of annoyance in it. “Leave her be and let’s get back to camp. Lest we get lost out here after the sun goes down.”

Eli appreciated the sentiment, but she almost wished Wyll had stayed silent.

“Ah, the dashing Blade of Frontiers here to save the pretty damsel from the dangerous vampire,” Astarion said, with more than a hint of contempt to his words.

Astarion and Wyll did not play nice. They reminded Eli of two dogs posturing and vying for control when they were near one another. And, unfortunately, everyone else got pissed on in the process.  

Astarion continued to bait the hook, voice sickly suggestive. “Hoping she’ll offer you a place to sheath your blade tonight if you play hero?”

Eli wheeled on Astarion with a glare that only succeeded in making the elf smile wider. For all of his pompous confidence, Eli did take note of the fact that Astarion had backed off from her. At least in the physical sense. He seemed more than happy to continue his verbal assault.

“You vulgar bastard!” Wyll barked back, angrily stepping towards Astarion who was grinning like a feral cat. Wyll was taking the bait.

“Lolth’s rotten nickers!” Eli exclaimed, exasperated and over all of this. “If the two of you want to have it out, fine! Just know I’m not asking Withers to bring either of you miserable assholes back if one of you kills the other!”

The blood in her head was pounding again, pulsating painfully behind her eyes. Eli threw up her hands and turned away from the squabbling men, only to see that tiefling barbarian, Karlach, watching all of them with a grin.

“You lot seem fun as hell!” she proclaimed with a laugh as the toll house continued to blaze like an inferno behind her. “Still cool if I tag along?”

“Yeah, sure,” Eli responded. “We all seem to be in the same shithole of a boat, so if you want to grab a paddle I’m not stopping you.”

Eli smirked and Karlach’s face lit up with excitement. “That’s the spirit!”

The next few moments were a blur. Moments in which Eli felt very much like a passenger in her own body. Astarion wasn’t letting up, and from behind her Eli heard his goading voice as he continued to taunt Wyll.

“You know, Wyll, if you’re ever curious about what our dear, sweet Eli tastes like, all you have to do is ask,” Astarion’s sly words were dripping with inuendo.

Eli snapped.

She rounded on Astarion like a displacer beast loosed from hell, stepping into his personal space just as he had done to her earlier. Eli, however, was not playing games. Her head felt like it was exploding from the inside and her vision was beginning to swim. She needed to get out of here. She needed to leave before she lost control. She needed to put this flippant, disrespectful maggot in his place.

“Would you FUCK OFF with your self-aggrandizing bullshit!” she roared.

Eli was up in Astarion’s face now, all venom and rage as she tried to maintain enough control to keep herself from driving a dagger through his eye like the monster inside of her was demanding.

“I’ve let you feed on me ONE time, and that has been the extent of any nightly activities between us,” she growled, locking eyes with the vampire spawn.

Astarion was a few inches taller than her, but in this moment it didn’t matter. They had all seen Eli fight. They’d witnessed the absolute carnage and power that she was capable of, and while most of that ability came from whatever deal she’d made with her patron, they had all sensed something else beyond her skill as a warlock. Something foul and brutal and violent that she seemed desperate to keep restrained.

That thing was leaking out now. Pressing at the barricades in her mind wrestling to break free. It wanted blood and gore and anguish. It wanted out.

“So, keep your pathetic attention-whoring charade in check or I’m going to lock you in a coffin and burry you so fucking deep even the worms won’t be able to find you!” Eli snarled, eyes glittering with a mania that indicated she was far from joking.

Eli didn’t know the chord she’d struck in Astarion – she didn’t even know if he had chords to be struck. She didn’t know how her words wrenched unbidden memories to the surface of his mind, like puss oozing from an infected wound. She didn’t know the torments inflicted upon him. Didn’t know that her words caused his chest to tighten with anxiety as unwanted recollections flashed in his mind. Days, months, years trapped in lonely confinement at the whim of his abuser. Locked away and starved because he said something displeasing or because he begged to be spared the agony of having his scars cut open once again because his master was bored and wanted to play.

Astarion had gone very still in the face of Eli’s wrath. And as the haze of anger in her mind dissipated and the realization of what she’d just said crashed down upon her, her eyes went wide and she took a quick step back. Her head was a mess and she felt like she was coming up out of a dream and seizing control of herself once more.

Shadowheart, Wyll and Karlach stood by, staring with a mix of shock and morbid curiosity. They were not going to get involved, but they damn sure were going to watch this disaster play out.

“I…uh…” Eli stuttered as she pulled herself back from the brink.

Her movements felt lethargic and wrong, as if she were a step removed from the actions her body was taking. But she kept hold of her mental steering wheel and willed herself to maintain control.

“Fuck. I’m sorry, Astarion,” she lifted her gaze, wanting to meet his eyes so she could explain and apologize again.

But Astarion wasn’t looking at her. At least, not at her face. His eyes were fixated on the collar of the burgundy undershirt she wore below her chest armor. His expression fluctuated somewhere between grim detachment and smoldering hatred, crimson eyes glassy and distant.

Eli felt an unnerving sensation of being looked through.

“Astarion?” she questioned, voice softer and tinged with an edge of worry.

She took a tentative step forward and raised a hand towards him. Had he been struck with an incantation? A curse? Maybe Shadowheart or Wyll had cast something as a means of intervention?

Eli was about to turn and ask them when Astarion flinched back from her outstretched hand as if she’d struck him. His eyes snapped to hers and burned with a hostility she’d never seen from him, not even during the famously vehement rows he and Gale would get into over Gale’s cooking (the arguments usually ended with Gale shouting, “You aren’t even going to eat any of it, anyway!” and storming off in a dither).

“Don’t,” Astarion snarled through clenched teeth and a tight jaw. “Don’t fucking touch me!”

Icy loathing dripped off his every word and Eli suddenly recognized the defensive posture he’d put himself in, leaning back and away from her with hands ready to go for a weapon or even swing at her should she move closer. He reminded her of an animal trapped in a corner, baring its fangs at something…

At something dangerous. At something intent on hurting them.

Shit. Had her outburst really been that bad? Had he really thought she was going to attack him?

A pang stabbed through her stomach as she realized…of course he had. Because of what she’d done to Alfira. She’d already proven she was capable of brutalizing the people around her, no matter how innocent they were. They thought she was dangerous. Astarion, a godsdamn vampire who’d crept up on her in the middle of the night, thought she was dangerous.

She needed to get herself under control. This wasn’t a sustainable lifestyle. At least not for the people around her…

“Astarion, I’m really fucking sorry,” she backed away from him, giving him space and bringing her hands back to her sides. “I’m not even entirely sure what happened. Things got…hazy. I’m really sorry.”

It was a piss poor excuse, and an even worse apology. She knew. And it seemed he agreed.

“You can choke on your apology,” Astarion snapped as he shoved past her. “If the tadpole turns you tonight, it wouldn’t be too soon.”

The sheer venom of his words stung as painfully as if he’d stabbed her right there on the spot. She opened her mouth to reply, but could think of nothing worthwhile to say. So she snapped it closed and watched him walk off down the path that led back to camp.

Well, some fantastic leader she was turning out to be. She already didn’t understand why anyone thought she, with her magnitude of memory loss and murder happy tendencies, was the ideal candidate for a position of authority. She was awful at this shit!

Eli had spent a lot of time combing through her fractured psyche, trying to piece together any semblance of facts about who she was. In all that self-reflection, she’d concluded there were two things she was really good at. Killing people and drinking.

Fuck, what she wouldn’t give to be doing either one of those things right now instead of this.

She turned a miserable expression on her remaining companions. “Is it too late to go back to the mind flayer ship and just surrender?”

Wyll laughed and sided up to her, clapping a hand on her shoulder and trying to be reassuring.

“I’m sure he’ll get over it,” he said. Then, with a somewhat darker smirk, “And if he doesn’t, we’ll just stake him. Luckily for us, our benevolent illithid captors saw fit to crash us in the middle of a forest. Trees everywhere.”

Wyll grinned while Eli just gave him a deadpan stare. He wasn’t helping. Maybe he wasn’t too pure for their little group, after all. Maybe he was just as much of a dumbass as the rest of them.

Eli looked to Shadowheart, who simply rolled her eyes before glancing after Astarion as he continued to walk further and further from the party.

“I bet he just needs some time to cool down,” Shadowheart mused. “Men can be irrationally dramatic when they put their minds to it.”

The grin on Wyll’s face fell as Shadowheart started to follow Astarion down the path. Eli trailed after her, glancing to Karlach in the hopes of making some sort of conversation to distract herself from all the pain and noise in her head.

“I’m just happy to be here,” Karlach laughed.

#baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate fanfiction #baldurs gate astarion #astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion x tav #astarion x dark urge #astarion angst #astarion bg3 #bg3 astarion #astarion x mc #astarion x original female character #astarion x oc #astarion romance #astarion fanfic #astarion fic #astarion fluff #bg3 #bg3 spoilers #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 fic #baldur's gate iii

[ijustkindalikebooks]

I really hope I don't read a life changing book in the next three weeks so this list is out of date, but this is a list of twelve books that have been dwelling in my head for the last year.

I quote them, I think about them, I think "holy cow someone wrote that" often about these and I can't wait to either the read the next one or the next thing that comes from this author (or both). I really hope you've had an amazing year of reading and I can't wait to see your own lists from 2023.

How High We Go In The Dark by Sequoia Nagamatsu - A sort of slow burn book that has dwelled in my brain since I read it back in April, How High We Go In The Dark is a dark exploration of humanity connected by short stories that have a common thread through the book. The rollercoaster story lives in my head rent free, and not in a good way, it's a little bit disturbing, but I think we live in a dystopia more than we believe we do and maybe there's a metaphor in there somewhere.

Sea Of Tranquility by Emily St John Mandel - Another book that connects via short stories, this is quite common for me as I love that sort of thing, reflecting on my list of books. I think Mandel writes so poetically and brilliantly throughout this book, she delivers on pathos and emotion to really deliver stories about people, about people in different timelines connected by a strange portal moment of magic. If you love fantasy but in a more contemporary delivery, I do recommend this book to you.

The End Of The Affair by Graham Greene - I am a collector of books as much as a reader of them and this year I've been trying to read my bookshelves a bit more as I just am buying books to make myself look clever at this point, which is just lame. This was one of the first books on my shelf, and though not perfect, and damn did she deserve better, this book delves into obsession and love and what it actually means to people. It's a weird book.

Another Day In The Death Of America by Bryan Younge - I am not American, I have never seen a gun in real life in the hands of a person I know (some police have them near Parliament, well they did once I think) so I don't understand America and their passion for ammunition, but this book should not make you proud of it. This book is a gut punch through every chapter as the author details the young lives lost to guns in 24 hours. A brilliant and sad book.

Tower by Bae Myung-Hoon - My passion for Korean Literature does not abate (I am not a Koreaboo, don't worry). There's a way Korean writers write books like their objective observers on a scene that I particularly enjoy and Tower is another good example of this. Tower again is short stories tied together about a building that is it's own country and the people who live and want to live in it. The Elephant chapter hasn't left my brain since I read it and I recommend it (unless you like Elephants, then don't, cos it's again fucked up).

Beyond The Story: 10 Years of BTS by BTS - Ahh BTS, since 2017 I've known this group and their impact of my life and music taste is so ridiculous, I feel like something's walk into your life for a reason and wow, did they. The story of the rise of BTS from a lucky break on Mnet's music show to Grammy nominations (robbed!) is incredible to read and even if you don't like them it's a fascinating insight into a group that made their name in a country that was dominated by three big music companies, and they weren't on any of them - Hybe now supercedes all of them. An incredible underdog tale.

Lirael by Garth Nix - Where has this man been all my life with these books? I'm embarassed, be embarassed for me. This series is so good so far, I'm going to read Abhorsen next year which I believe is the next one and I can't wait. I would also recommend the Booksellers Of London series too by the same author, which is every bit as good and set in 80's London/Bath. Fantastic fantasy that makes you think where is the next one, give it to me now.

The Last Devil To Die by Richard Osman - Y'know, this series is so British, it should come with teabags and digestive biscuits, but I love it all the same. A series about a group of pensioners who solve mysteries, The Last Devil To Die is the fourth book in this series and it's probably for me one of the best. The storyline with Stephen is devastating and the plot is incredible with characters that come to life every time this book is opened. I can't wait for whatever this author does next and those who voted for The Housemaid on Goodreads, I'm judging you, to be honest.

Hortus Curious by Michael Perry - Plants, people. Plants are incredible, insane, incredible. There are plants who eat living things, but that's just the start of their madness. This book is an incredible exploration in fantastic plants you would think you'd only see in a Herbology classroom but here they are in real life, killing people and eating small animals. Fantastic book, if you love nature and weird stuff, this is for you.

Against White Feminism by Rafia Zakaria - I think the white women were in the house so much from this book. How women were protected in their plantations as people were treated abysmally who were just another intersection from them. I think we all need to work on our biases, prejudices and judgements we make and this is a short and brilliant book that could help you do that. I consider myself a feminist, and to be a good one you also have to shut and listen to people who don't look like you, make spaces intersectional my friends.

The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang - The only romance book for me with rights this year (I keep being recommend books about hockey players and I am, that's just not going to happen). The representation of autism is fantastic and the sexy times are sexy if you need that and the characters, the characters are impeccable. I really recommend all of her books to be honest (and Talia Hibbert too, actually) as they make such great books with fantastic rep.

The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman - John Green on Crash Course said about this book 'the thing about this dystopian book is that this dystopia has already happened'. Charlotte was told by her doctors to quit all her hobbies and stay in a room and do nothing and it drove her to a deeper sickness, she wrote this book during that time of recovering from her ''recovery'' and it makes for powerful reading. The whole story is easily found online for free and I highly recommend it, probably one of the first psychological thrillers.

I apologise if some of these are a bit grammatically weird, I am working on it, I only just found out I'm dyslexic hence my difficulty with small text and need for audiobooks (smh, sometimes it's so obvious it makes me shake my head).

Please let me know what your favourite books of 2023 were.

Vee xo

#booklr #books #fiction #bookblr #book #non fiction #classics #fantasy #mystery #science fiction

[effervescentdragon]

Hi, I hope this isn't too random, but you seem like a good person to ask for fic recs. Ignore this if it's too much of a bother, but if not what are your favorite Seb and or Charles-centric fics? Hope you're having a good day :D

Hello dearest anon! Thank you so much for asking me this and giving me a way to decompress after my exams, and also, thank you for trusting in my taste about my favorite vroom vroom boys <3 I will put the recs under the cut, because it's going to get long. Many (if not all) of these are slash fics, and most of them will probably be Sebchal (because I am trash about them), but I'll include pairings and some details, but please mind the tags and warnings in fics :) also these are the ones I remembered off the top of my head rn after 2 exams (read: fics that live in my head rent free all the time)

-

sebchal/cheb fic recs first!

an evolutionary theory of the soul by Anney

sebchal soulmates au. my absolute favorite, one of my ultimate comfort reads, the most perfect thing i've read and one of the first ones i've ever read. i re-read it often, and it also contains links to the moments described in the fic, so i use it for research (and comfort) on top of it all <3

Down in the Depths We Make Our Home by my dearest @antimonyandthyme

a pacific rim au that made me almost miss roc22 race because i was so invested in it, i couldnt even stop reading it. pacific rim is one of my all time favorite movies, and this is just. so, so bloody beautiful. athy is a master wordsmith, and this fic is. i don't know how to describe it. transcendental. ephemereal. everything. <3

here comes the sun by the lovely @wdcseb

aka the fic ive read probably top 3 most times out of them all. sometimes i go and just read that japan part and melt and die all over. seb comes back as ferrari's team principal after retiring. charles still drives. idek where to start with how wonderful this fic is. i can quote half of it by now. <3

Everything I do, I'm gonna think of you by @misonikomi

beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. seb still races, but charles is a disillusioned model. its such a lovely story of acceptance and of two different worlds crashing, but not really. it has some of my favorite descriptions, and seb's character is wonderfully done throughout. also, there is a sequel from charles' pov, which is equally lovely. i reread it a lot.

With you I'm in real danger by wonderful @jean----ralphio

seb sells antique books in Monaco. charles is a pornstar. i am IN LOVE with this. the way their rl personalities and issues apply to how they are in this au is magnificently written and just all around amazing. also, very hot :)

postcards from places that miss you by @streetlightsky

i screamed about this fic so much, like so so much. the postcards have one of the best confrontation scenes ever. the showing and not telling really comes through here, and it just. it makes me feel happy whenever i read it.

all of these authors have other fics that you should definitely check out, but these are my favorites by each of them! all of these are also completed bcs I rarely bother with unfinished work, but there is a wip i follow religiously: To be wild, to be free by anonymous author (if you by any chance happen to read this, i adore your fic <3!), where in a twist of fate or magic or whatever, Charles wakes up and Seb is young, and only starting his F1 career as a rbr driver :) and nobody remembers older Seb except Charles. i've re-read what's published like. 5 times so far or sth, i love it so much.

for seb-focused fics, the first, ultimate, and only fic that comes to mind is dearest @kritischetheologie 's Everybody Wants To Rule The World, which is a NicoR/Seb fic and has some of the absolute best characterisation of Seb i've ever seen. it made me so feral, i couldnt write anything for a week because it took over my brain and every time i thought of anything else, i just couldn't. i adore it <3

i will also self-promote here, because my first foray into f1 rpf was a seb-focused fic Red Gods of Old, which is a 2nd person pov magical realism diary entry that focuses on seb in ferrari :)

honorary mention to my ultimate comfort sewis fic I've Got You by @loveyouhomex which made me cry with how perfect it is, and i've only read it twice, because it devastates me in the best way out there. it spans their whole acquaintance in f1, and its so, so beautiful.

there is another wip i follow, which really explores sebs character in a fascinating way, and the self deprecation we've all witnessed, transformed through the superpower au. it's a simi fic by @creampuffjiggle called Six Feet From Ice and i am entranced by it! tho i did binge read it just as the last chapter published turned out to be a hearbreak <3 wholehearted rec!

for charles-focused fics, there are so many lovely ones in the pierre/charles tag on ao3, though most of them are extremely angsty. the ones that i love, and that come to mind instantly are these:

whatever our souls are made of (his and mine are the same) by empireofclouds - a soulmate au with heavy mythologizing that i fucking ADORE;

 hopefully, one day you will love me back by @sebchalex - where monaco gets kicked out of eu and pierre and charles marry and somehow still pine over each other;

If I were proper, I’d have a chance; not with you, but somebody else by @deepdowninshipperhell - an a/b/o which i literally have open on my phone at all times for comfort because its just perfect.

in the end, i will include my own fics here too, because first of all why not, and second of all i do write about seb and charles most often :)

Monaco - sebchal, monaco gp 2022 as it shouldve been;

Taller In Another Dimension - piarles, montreal 2022 date as i choose to believe it went;

By The Same Blade - sebchal, magical realism ft hanahaki disease 5+1.

thank you so, so much for asking anon, i love you for this <3

#f1 rpf #akira answers asks #sebchal #simi #piarles #sico #sewis #akiras rpf fic rec masterlist #all of these make me insanely happy <3 #anon asks #fic rec

[disgruntleddemon]

continuing my JuniperAnt propaganda <3

continuing from my last hcs on em, i've had this scene idea rolling around my head lately. my thinking is Antfur starts to get restless. Juniperclaw is stuck in this dark gross tunnel, and Antfur rly can't go anywhere else either. he feels tossed aside and forgotten by the clans, and he feels like Juniperclaw has been too.

Antfur knows ghosts exists. there has to be other afterlives outside of starclan and the df. somewhere where he and Juniperclaw can really belong. even when Cinnamontail and Blazefire pass, as far as Antfur knows they could probably still visit each other.

for Juniperclaw, he has family in starclan. Starclan is an end goal for him. something that feels so terribly close. he can't turn away now, if he did he'd never be given another chance. he barely has a chance as is, and he couldn't throw it away.

ig just an continuation on the whole "Antfur becomes more disillusioned while Juniperclaw becomes more devoted" thing. they both feel desperate for something that's just outside of their grasp, and those goals aren't lined up. neither of them really knowing what their future holds or what to even do.

but ye,, love going insane over two rando cats w no cannon interactions. these two live in my brain rent free <33

#warrior cats #my art #Antfur #Juniperclaw

[the-darklings]

That anon felt unnecessarily aggressive and WAY out of line. Your response was perfectly understandable and kind. And I'm sure most people are just engaging with the story, not sending asks to demand an explanation. That anon needs to take a step back and rethink how they approached you. Absolutely unacceptable. Not to mention, this has always been snapshots into the world and relationships of Wanderer. While that may not be how some people like to read, it's their job to move on and find something else. Not demand a different way/story/etc from the writer.

Please don't feel like you've done something wrong. Second person POV is extremely difficult and you leaving it as a blank slate for us to imagine our own character is wonderful. You're one of the best reader insert writers I've read. And I've never EVER felt like your scenes were incomplete or like I was left confused. There are many, MANY writers who hint at things and don't immediately spell out the scene or explanation. Reading has always been about interpretation and making readers think. Or even fill in the gaps with their own experience. If you need everything hand fed to you, maybe you need to read something different.

Anyway, this story lives rent free in my head and it's beautiful and feels like it breathes a life of its own. I love how much you tip your hat to the comics and storytelling. Keep doing what you're doing. And thank you for sharing it with us.

Thank you very much for saying so!

Anon is entitled to their opinion; I respect it because they outlined it respectfully. Critisism is part of the job, and in all honesty, my own brain can often be far crueller to me jsdhgdsg

I do appreciate your words, though, as you nailed it on honing in what was intended for this story from my side. If I didn't have a work-related writing project, original novel, and other large series on my plate already, in all truth, tibyim would have actually gone through the 1000 years year by year (or close to it), so you would have seen a far more linear, slow-paced style. The trade-off would have been another 300k+ series. I simply don't have spare time for project so large right now. Even so, I ended up falling in love with it so much that it's become far more extensive than I intended. It will probably be 50-60k upon completion + two full-length one-shots + multiple blurbs + likely a sequel or one-shots handling future arcs from the comics, too.

#i forgot to mention it on the other ask but yes majority of the asks about the hob/wanderer scene were guesses/theories #also it's fine guys dw. i could have ignored the anon (it's honestly a miracle I even spotted it with how busy my inbox is) #but criticism is just as important as positive feedback. even more so. #asks

[quitefair]

Fanfiction Writer Questions!

Was tagged by the very lovely @optiwashere some time ago, and I've only just had the chance to sit down and take a crack at this!

Not gonna tag anybody, but if you read this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!

(Also this is talking about a lot of fics that I've written but not published because well... that's just how it's been lmao...

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

13 at the moment. I’ve deleted a few things that I’m not entirely proud of/works that I’m planning on rewriting and improving upon.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

26,031 (my WIP folder has almost 100k words, if we want any comparison)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mainly Dragon Age! Although AO3 is misleading… I’ve only got 7 fics on there for Dragon Age. But these don’t include the ones I’ve deleted and also the literal hundreds of WIP documents in my writing folder. It’s become quite a problem. I’ve also been writing for Baldur’s Gate 3 a bit more recently, but those fics are on hold because of lack of time/motivation/the fact I’ve not finished the game yet and want to do my research and understand characterisation and plot better.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. a lesson in grief (T-rated, Vi/Caitlyn from Arcane) 2. slip away (G-rated Gen-fic from Hades 2020) 3. Names (G-rated Fenris/Female Hawke from Dragon Age) 4. Anxious Grief (T-rated, Cassandra Pentaghast/Male Cadash from Dragon Age) 5. Fear and Forgiveness (G-rated, Dorian Pavus/Male Adaar from Dragon Age)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! Every single comment I get is like fuel to my brain so I love and appreciate each one!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I think I did toy around with a fic where I left Hawke in the Fade. The process of getting into Fenris’ headspace during that was way too painful for me to continue.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics tend towards happy endings, even if they pack a lot of angst in the body of em. Of the ones I’ve got published, I’d say Names.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven’t, but then again I post so rarely and sporadically so people forget I even exist huhu.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

… Yes… (and that’s all im gonna say)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I’ve not written crossovers per se, I’m more of an AU kinda guy. Though there’s definitely an ancient story I wrote back when I was like 13 that had like, every single bit of media I’d ever loved merged into one, and the excuse was that I’d just read His Dark Materials and wanted my own universe where everything I loved existed at once. COMPLETELY self-indulgent shit.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know…

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope! At least not that I know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Again no… I’ve not done a lot of stuff huhu!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

It’s the one and only. The girls that live rent free in my head. The girls that deserve everything. (It’s Josephine Montilyet/my Inquisitor from Dragon Age Inquisition)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

It’s the Dragon Age Inquisition rewrite I’ve been complaining about for the longest time. It’s become the pet project I keep poking at whenever I have the energy to. All my Tashak/Josephine fics are set within this, and honestly at this point, instead of making one large fic, I might as well just post the disjointed chapters separately even if they don’t make sense. I’ve got WIPs in the folder from 2016. It’s out of control.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I’d like to think I’m good at descriptive writing, at drawing the reader into the scene and pulling them along with the story.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I’m so bad at dialogue it’s not even funny. Also, my writing can tend towards too much rambling – I guess that’s just because it’s the way my brain works.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

The only other language I’m fluent in is Malay, and I really can’t imagine myself writing in that unless in very specific circumstances.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Dang, I think it was probably for BIONICLE. Way back when I was like, in secondary school.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Published? Names. There’s stuff in there I still feel jealous of, even today. Unpublished – a bunch of stuff for Aforementioned Dragon Age Rewrite. I should really post stuff from there at some point LMAO…

#meera talks #my writing #WAHOO ive been in a good mood and sorting out my writing folders...... its been getting me excited to publish stuff again #whether or not if happens.... we'll see!