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#that sure as fuck don't mean any fucking one of them ever bothers to make use of it when it matters lol
izzyspussy · 29 days
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i think a lot of people have never been in a truly desperate situation but think they have, and this causes them to pass really harsh judgment on people who made bad choices when either irrational or having no good choices to pick instead, and i really wish people could get some fucking self-perception and work on their compassion skills and not fucking do that as much anymore
#jack facts#people be banging on about empathy this empathy that#and like sure maybe people have a measurable capacity for it but i can tell you what#that sure as fuck don't mean any fucking one of them ever bothers to make use of it when it matters lol#and i mean on the other hand it's hard to conceptualize how you would feel going through something you've never experienced before#i just wish people would be AWARE of the fact they don't know!#or like that there's a difference between ''i can't afford anything but instant ramen'' and ''i can't get any food or water''#or a difference between being freaked out by spiders and having clinical arachnophobia#or a difference between ''my loved one is sick and i'm really worried about them'' and ''my loved one is dying in front of me''#etc etc etc etc etc#anyway the longer i live the more i'm convinced that empathy is a garbage concept#and actually a more reliable way to act with true compassion is through at least some capacity for relative objectivity#the ability to say ''i don't know how that feels and i cannot understand it through comparison'' and to be able AND WILLING#to take people's self reports on their feelings thought processes or lackthereof in good faith and with sympathy#and also the ability to acknowledge that doing a bad thing for good reasons does not negate the bad thing being bad#but also should and does change what consequences are appropriate and/or most effective#and also like............... things people do in desperation or other irrational states do not represent Who They Are As A Person#or what it's like to hang out with them in a day to day situation#another thing i keep getting more and more aware of is like. if y'all can't even handle an irrational or impulsive choice that does harm#done by an otherwise ''good'' person under short term desperate situations#that they then do their best to reduce the harm of after the situation is over#i can not even imagine how absolutely unforgiving you must be of anyone who has delusions#and i mean real delusions and real psychosis not the hyperbolic babytalk version lol#like i don't think most of you even know what the fuck a delusion even is the way you act about things as simple & straightforward as like#fear. hunger. pain.#absolutely fucking exhausting
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bountycancelled · 8 months
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OPLA characters reacting to a sweet, girly reader who turns out to be a a ruthless fighter
genre: headcanons, fem! reader, kinda suggestive??, idfk just read it bro
requested: nope, but reqs are open! pls, for the love of god, request for the opla♡
feat: zoro, sanji
a/n: reader's feminine but not female if that makes sense, only witting again because I'm obsessed with the one piece live action. also, this may be a little ooc, since I haven't watched the anime/read the manga, sorry about that! also, if you wanna be added to my perm taglist, pls feel free to ask!
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☆ZORO☆
when you first joined the crew, zoro was immediately unsure of what exactly you brought to the table. I mean, they already had a swordsman, a sharp shooter, a navigator, a dumb cook and a captain/motivational speaker. so what were you doing here?
from luffy's explanation of you, he was aware that you were a good fighter, but he had never seen you in action.
the only things he had seen from you were stuffed animals laying around the ship, pastel outfits he could spot for miles, and bows that had been put in his hair while he slept.
he was tolerant of you at best, and straight up apathetic at worst, but finally, there came a time where someone tried picking a fight with you since you seemed like an easy target while you were walking with him and nami.
although he wasn't particularly fond of you (lies), he still felt the need to defend you as a crewmate, but the ass whooping you gave the stranger made him freeze in place.
there was blood splatter on your pretty face, deep red sploches of your cute clothes, and a look of pure hatred in your eyes. and you had never looked more beautiful in zoros eyes.
that was the first time zoro had ever smiled at you. sure, he had slightly smirked at your cuter tendencies, but in that moment he was truly smitten with you.
from that day, zoro wanted to train with you. what you lacked that he had in experience, you made up for in absolute cruelty when fighting. you were quick, agile and you weren't afraid to make zoro hurt, and he loved every second of it.
zoro would sometimes smile when he saw bruising on his body from his time training with you but catch himself and go stone faced immediately. no, he was not falling for you, absolutely not.
except he was, and the next time you showed up by his side with a slight limp, some tears in your cotton candy coloured clothes, blood all over you, and a sadistic smile on your face, he would tell you as much.
SANJI♡
sanji is unsurprisingly, enamoured by you the second you join the straw hats.
I'm talking, looking at you like you hung the stars in the sky, cheesy and constant compliments like "you're cuter than any of your stuffed animals, yn-swan~" and even brushing up on his baking skills to bake you aesthetically pleasing sweet treats that always put a smile on your face.
if I'm being completely honest, it doesn't bother him that he doesn't know exactly what your strengths are, you could be amazing at everything like barbie or you could literally not know night from day and he'd still admire you all the same.
one day, you're wearing bottoms that are on the shorter side not that sanji minds at all and you're out exploring the island you're at with him by your side, holding all your bags because in his words "angels don't do hard labour when he's around" when someone decides to hit on you.
you reject them politely, but when they make a less than appropriate comment about your outfit, you click your tongue and shake your head, readying yourself to hospitalise someone.
sanji's mood switches to one of being happy because he's around you to one of murderous intent the second this rando tries you, but you already have them wheezing on the floor with broken nose before sanji can even lift his leg off of the ground.
you're back to usual self, fixing the bow on your hair while complaining about how fucking hard it is to get blood stains off of your clothes, while sanji is thinking about how fucking hard he is
safe to say that this heartless, terrifying side of you makes sanji fall even harder and question whether or not he's a masochist.
he'll still insist on doing things like carrying you anywhere (most of your shoes you impractical as fuck, but style>functionality always) lifting things for you and treating you like a piece of fine china because that's exactly what you deserve, no matter how badass you are.
only difference is, now he'll never come to aid when it comes to kicking ass, because he enjoys seeing you take people to heaven and back more than anything.
he compliments now range from "omg you are the most adorable, lovable, doll-like angel I've ever seen" to "please punch me, step on me, make my nose bleed, choke me-" and he's now ten times more annoying about you than he was before, which no one thought was possible.
believe me when I say that images of you in frilly outfits with your eyes gleaming like diamonds eveytime you make someone bleed occupy 90% of his thoughts. (the other 10% is all things cooking, of course.)
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madamefortressmommyy · 11 months
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If you are ever thinking of an autistic person and say to yourself "I never really have to make any/many accomodations for them."
Yeah.
That is because WE are the ones making the accomodations for YOU.
You always hear about how we need all this support and patience but no one ever talks about the sacrafices ASD people make for he NTs in our lives that they never even see or know about.
Oh, you think I am "well spoken?" Thats cuz i spent a ridiculous amount of time rehearsing my lines and facial expressions to make sure they meet your liking.
I don't seem to have any sensory issues? My guy, i have nerve damage from raw dogging the pain. You ever watch a lactose intolerant person eat dairy? They aint gonna shit their pants in front of you. You dont have to follow them into he bathroom to believe them.
Oh you mean you dont remember me ever having a meltdown? I locked myself on the bathroom to have my "temper tantrums" in private since i was 5 years old.
You think I dont stim? Let me roll up my sleeves and show you the gashes and scars from clawing myself under my shirt. The inside of my mouth looks like a crime scene. I can taste the blood. You cant. I would much rather be "squirming" or wearing very strong perfume but i know that bothers people so i find another way.
You think i am "smart?" Yeah i might be, but that is because i am constantly using my problem solving skills to quietly and covertly solve problems i am not "supposed" to have. Problems that would never even occur to you. Problems you would never even know about because i am fucking terrified of what people would say if they knew it takes me 3 hours to get dressed and shower sometimes.
I have given myself perminant nerve damage just because i was afraid to make other people even a little uncomfy.
You understand body language because it comes naturally to you.
I understand body language because it comes naturally to you.
We are not the same.
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ryo-maybe · 2 years
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can u explain why AI art is bad without fearmongering, moralizing or bootlicking lol
I'm going to answer in good faith, even though the tone you're using sounds like you're harboring anything but. The issue with AI art isn't specifically inherent to the tools used to produce it, because, ultimately, a tool is merely that: something devoid of will which, in the hands of a human, can produce a specific outcome. It's the human element that taints what we could otherwise enjoy for the unquestioningly fascinating topic that is AI art and, by extension, AI software as a whole.
Now, the problem isn't people, period, but the kind of people that are responsible for giving AI the bad rep it's been getting, along with the intent that goes into both the development of AI tools and the things produced by dint of said tools. I'm talking about the tech bros happily rubbing their hands, waiting to provide business moguls with a brand new means to commodify and mass-produce what artists stake their entire livelihoods upon, because when you have enough zeroes lined up in your bank account, your eyes are utterly blinded to the soul and personality that human beings put into their handiwork, and which a machine won't ever be able to reproduce no matter how much stolen art you feed it. Oh yeah, by the way, that's how AI art tools have been making the rounds: by chewing on thousands upon thousands of stolen pictures made by actual people so that they may learn how to ape someone's style and spit out absolutely soulless derivatives, while the original authors don't see a lick of recognition or monetary retribution for any of it. Do I need to tell you why stealing and parading someone else's art as your own is a terrible, vile thing to do?
But sure, you did ask me to refrain from "fearmongering, moralizing or bootlicking", which I guess I've already done. So since you'd rather I skipped straight to the point in a concise manner, lemme offer some quick examples of why the culture surrounding AI art has already developed into one of the most abysmally disappointing displays of how greed and an utter lack of human decency can ruin something objectively brimming with possibilities:
Less than a week after the sudden death of Korean artist Kim Jung-gi, someone trained an AI model to mimic his artstyle, having the audacity of asking for credits if anyone wished to use it. I sincerely hope I don't have to explain to you why this is a ghoulish example of the kind of tone-deafness sported by tech bros who buy wholesale into the AI art craze.
A piece of AI art was submitted to an art contest and won. The "artist"'s work amounted to little more than picking a series of prompts and letting the machine do the work. It's as much art as googling a smattering of terms and making a collage of pictures taken from Pinterest (and even then, you would have put more work into it than this person did). That they won at all says a whole damn lot about how abysmal the respect given to artists - real artists - nowadays is.
There are a multitude of people out there already selling prints of AI-generated art. I could link some of them here, but honestly, type "ai art prints" on a search engine and you'll get inundated by them. I've seen and personally know artists who have had to undersell their works because commissions were the only thin, frayed string they could hang on in hopes of making it through the week without fucking starving themselves, but here we are: any random asshole can now yell "MASSIVE BREASTS, THIN WAIST, COCKTAIL DRESS, HUGE BADONGAS" at a computer, let it mash together a trillion of other people's hard work, and print it for easy bucks that the actual authors of the basic ingredients of their insipid soup will never, ever see a dime of.
It really bothers me that you mentioned "no bootlicking". Whose fucking boots is this side of the debate supposedly tasting? That of the artists who post every day about how angry, sad and terrified they are by the prospects of what the development of AI art will entail for their livelihood and passion? What kind of gall did your mother birth you with that you have the spiteful spunk to type that word, when you've got shit like an artist who had their sketch stolen while they were drawing it on stream, then fed to an AI and posted by someone passing it off as their own art? How does that not ignite your indignation? "Bootlicking". Like anyone's tongues have been tasting leather but those of the same tech bro chodes who kept trying oh so hard to convince us NFTs were the future while ruining the environment to make the absolute stupidest point ever made in the history of humanity.
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Shovel Talk(s) Part One
Part One 🦇Part Two🦇Part Three🦇Part Four
Steve and Eddie aren't even together when Steve gets the Shovel Talk from Eddie's uncle, but it is what tips Steve into talking to Eddie about his feelings, so he's not upset by it.
They aren't dating, not because he doesn't want Eddie, because he absolutely does. It's just that he wants to be sure Eddie wants him back. There are times when he's sure, when Eddie gets into his space a bit too close, or more often, than he does with anyone else. Eddie calls him a thousand and one nicknames, ranging from sweet to irritating but just when Steve thinks that's a perk left just for him, Eddie hands someone else a new nickname (just the one, a voice in Steve's head that sounds suspiciously like Robin says).
Not that any of that is the point. Wayne wouldn't bother to give Steve a shovel talk at all unless he knew how Eddie felt. Wayne is a man of action, and he's never done anything unless it mattered. Meant something. Steve and Wayne have sat in plenty of (what Steve considers to be) awkward silences because Wayne doesn't talk to fill the void of silence.
The point is, Steve drops Eddie off at the house the government so graciously bought for the Munsons, walks Eddie to the door and giving Eddie a hug goodbye. He stays on the porch until Eddie shuts the door and then nearly jumps out of his skin when he hears Wayne call out his name.
"Harrington," Wayne says from the shadows of the wrap around porch.
So, Steve jumps and it's only then he notices that Wayne is sitting at the table and chairs set up on the porch. "Mr. Munson, sir, hi. Hello."
Wayne lets out a chuckle, but it doesn't really sound amused. "I have come to accept that you are nothing like your father, boy, but I do want to make it clear to you, that Eddie means more to me than anything else on this Earth."
"I know, sir."
"I know you do. And while I will forever be grateful that you helped return him to me alive, know that I will not hesitate to make you disappear if you hurt my boy in a way he can't bounce back from."
Steve's not afraid of Wayne, not really, but that doesn't stop him from feeling the need to flee. He doesn't, though, because he'd gotten enough shovel talks from concerned parents in high school, and he knows they can sense weakness. "I can't promise I'd never hurt him, sir, but I can promise it'll never be intentional."
He can't actually see Wayne's face in the darkness but he feels sized up all the same.
"I believe that, Steve," Wayne says, and it's the first time Steve's ever heard his name leave the man's mouth, "now go home."
-
Wayne's shovel talk was expected. Robin's is not.
"You took Eddie on a date date?" She whispers it as though they aren't alone in Steve's living room. They're laying on the floor in a line, heads next to each other so if they turn slightly to the side they can make eye contact. Steve's not sure why they always end up on the floor for Serious Talk Time.
"Yeah," Steve says, looking away from Robin's face to stare up to the ceiling, "I mean, sorta? We can't like... be open that it was a date, but we went to dinner and a movie and it was nice. Shared a popcorn and played footsie under the diner table."
"Whoa," Robin says. "I never thought you'd- didn't think you'd be brave enough to ask him."
"Me either."
"Steve," Robin sounds serious, so Steve turns to look at her. She studies his face for a moment before she's the one to look away, speaks to the ceiling, "be careful with Eddie, yeah?"
"What? Careful how?"
"I just think you could really fuck him up," Robin says. "You're his first boyfriend, right? That's going to set a precedent for relationships that might happen if you two don't work out. And I hate to say this, because I know you've changed, but like, I saw how a lot of those girls you dated in high school ended up when you broke up with them."
Steve's a little hurt, because Robin's his best friend. She should be giving this talk to Eddie, not him. But, also, he understands. He knows that Robin knew about Eddie's sexuality before he did, knows they bonded over being queer while Steve was still figuring himself out.
Steve also knows that Eddie's never been in a relationship before, Eddie'd told him at much when Steve asked him out. Steve doesn't like that Robin implied that he and Eddie will eventually break up, but no matter how much that thought makes Steve's heart ache, he won't know if it'll happen unless it does.
He just doesn't understand why she seems to think he'll be the one breaking Eddie's heart. It could go the other way.
"Did you OD over there?" Robin asks, trying to lighten the mood.
"No," Steve answers, "I'll be careful."
-
They've been on four more dates before Nancy knocks on his door. She doesn't accept his invitation to come inside. Just starts speaking on his doorstep.
"As Eddie's Capital P Soulmate," is how she starts that sentence, and it makes something hurt deep inside Steve as he tries not to think about Robin, "I am obligated to remind you that I do own several guns now. And I don't miss."
"Jesus Christ," Steve says, because even Wayne was more subtle, "I got it."
"Good. I do know you'd never hurt him on purpose," Nancy says but Steve doesn't feel reassured.
He thinks that, if she really didn't think he's going to end up hurting Eddie she wouldn't have said anything at all. "Right."
"Well, good talk Steve," and then she's walking down the driveway and climbing into her car.
He closes the door and goes to the kitchen to get himself a beer, mostly so he has something to do besides stew in his emotions. He wonders if Eddie has been given the shovel talk, too? Maybe Robin did the same thing Nancy just did. Showed up unprompted, threatened Eddie with some sort of bodily harm, and then just left.
Steve grabs the phone and dials Eddie's number.
"Hello?" Eddie's voice greets him, albeit questioningly.
"Eddie, it's Steve."
"Oh, hello sweetheart," Eddie says, "are you calling for business or pleasure?"
Steve laughs, "business."
"Boo!"
"Listen, uh, I had a question. I just wanted to know if anyone's said anything to you. About us. Or, y'know, specifically about us and our relationship?"
"Uh, not really? A few congratulations, I guess. Why? Did someone say something?" Eddie's voice is level, almost too level, so Steve knows he's trying to keep cool.
"Oh, no! No! I mean, aside from the scary shovel talk from- Wayne, everyone's been surprisingly cool about it. Very supportive," Steve says and even though it's true, everyone they've told has been cool about it, it feels a little bit like a lie.
Eddie laughs, "I can't believe my uncle gave you a shovel talk! You know, I keep expecting to get one from Robin but so far nothing. She must think you're safe in my capable hands."
Steve is safe in Eddie's hand, he thinks, but that doesn't stop the sting that goes through him. "Of course, she does. You've been a perfect boyfriend."
There's a pause before Eddie's voice comes through the phone, soft and quiet, "I'm glad you said so. I want to be. For you."
"You're not allowed to say those kinds of things when you aren't within kissing distance, babe," Steve says, because if he doesn't add humor to this conversation, he's going to tell Eddie he loves him instead, and even Steve knows that saying that a month into dating is too soon, especially over the phone where he can't see Eddie's reaction.
Eddie laughs and makes kissing sounds at him before the conversation shifts to chatting about the day and making plans for the weekend.
-
Steve is trying really hard to not be the person he was in high school but every time he gets to the point where he's being a better person, someone brings up how he used to be. Shoves it back into his face that no matter what Steve does he can't outrun his past.
One such time is shortly after Steve and Eddie accidentally come out as a couple to all of Hellfire. Steve was just dropping off the boys and had stepped inside to chat a bit. Once game time had arrived it had and Steve made to leave, they'd (he and Eddie) had been on autopilot. Eddie'd whined 'where's my goodbye kiss?' and Steve had stepped over, kissed him goodbye, and was out the door before it had actually computed.
Steve had burst back through the door, rushing back to Eddie, because no way in Hell was he going to leave his boyfriend to deal with whatever the consequences would be alone.
It had been absolute chaos at the table with people shouting over each other.
"Of all the people you could be with, you picked Steve!? You could do better!" Mike had whined, and Steve had thought for sure he was the only one who had heard Mike until he saw Will punch his arm and hiss his own 'don't be a dick' at Mike.
It took almost half an hour to calm everyone down. It was a relief to know that Eddie had come out to his bandmates/the older Hellfire members already. The kids took it in stride, in the end, and Eddie had shoo'd Steve away.
Jeff had excused himself, too, and Steve thought he was just going to use the bathroom but instead he followed Steve outside.
Ah. Steve knows what's coming.
"Harrington," Jeff says, "can't say I'm excited that you're the secret boyfriend Eddie's constantly sighing wistfully about. I'm sure Wayne's already threatened you," And Robin, and Nancy, and Mike doesn't think he's good enough, "but if you hurt Eddie-"
"I get it! There will be dire consequences if I hurt Eddie," Steve snaps, not down for hearing it anymore. He stomps to his car and peels away from the curb without bothering to look back.
-
If he's being honest, Steve didn't even know he had a breaking point with shovel talks until he gets his fifth one from Dustin.
It's not even a shovel talk. It's just a single sentence, said almost a month after Dustin learned about their relationship. He's dropping Dustin off after their DnD game. Normally Claudia picks him up, but she's busy tonight and asked Steve to do it.
"Alright, Henderson, safely delivered."
"Thanks, Steve," Dustin says, unbuckles his seatbelt, and opens the door, before turning back to Steve. He just looks at him for a moment.
"What?"
"I'm happy for you and Eddie. Just, don't hurt him, ok?"
He nods his head but can't say anything. Dustin grabs his backpack, shoots him a smile, and climbs out. Steve does wait until Dustin closes the front door behind him before putting the car back in gear.
He manages to get home, somehow, because Steve doesn't fully remember the drive. It's not that his mind was so focused on something else that made him fail to take in his surroundings, but rather that his mind wasn't even a part of his body anymore.
One moment he was pulling away from the Henderson residence, and the next, he was home, just standing in his kitchen in the dark. And now that his thoughts are back, or easier to process, he finds himself wondering why everyone thinks that he's going to be the one to hurt Eddie.
How many people has he hurt that this is his reputation? Is it inevitable that he will hurt Eddie? Is it truly just a matter of time until he breaks Eddies heart? Why is everyone so convinced that he will?
Briefly the thought occurs to him that maybe he should call up Eddie and break up with him right now, before Eddie has a chance to get in deep enough that Steve could break his heart, but just the thought of it breaks Steve's heart, so he's not going to do that. Doesn't want to do that. That would just be punishing Eddie for something he didn't do.
None of this is Eddie's fault, and Steve's an asshole for even thinking of breaking up with him because of it. Which feeds him back into the loop of thinking that maybe everyone is right about him. He is an asshole and will someday hurt Eddie, perhaps even on purpose.
He loves Eddie. He's in love with Eddie. But does loving him mean proving his friends wrong? Or does it mean leaving him before they're proven right?
He wants to ask everyone why they think he'll hurt Eddie.
He wants to ask everyone why they don't care if he's the one that gets hurt.
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literaila · 3 months
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house rules (roommate au)
gojo satoru x fem!reader
summary:
"satoru keeps an infinite amount of space between him and everyone else."
warnings: mentions of alcohol and drinking, slight angst, mentions of tampons (terrifying), suggestive comments, absurdly long, alternate universe characters
a/n: to all of my frequent readers--i have never claimed to be sane :)
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in the broad spectrum of things, opening the door in nothing but your bathrobe and a ridiculously bright orange clay mask is not the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you. 
oh no, puking on your first ever date at seventeen definitely takes the cake. finding your seventh-grade friends bent over a table reading your diary--in which you wrote many explicit things about them, not to mention, yourself--might be even worse. riding your bike into the pond by your house in front of all of your--much older, much cooler--neighbors, even. picking up your coffee in your favorite cafe and spilling it, which was not only devastating but humiliating because you managed to spill your mocha on every other drink waiting there (effectively banning you from returning) still haunts your dreams. even walking down the street and trying to pretend like you didn't just trip over air in front of every single one of your peers still lingers in your mind, waiting for a moment of peace before it attacks.
you're used to the feeling of dread in your stomach and the nights spent thinking about all of these moments, like a scrapbook in your mind--just there to make your skin itch. 
but, it does get a little bit worse when you realize the man you've opened the door to is none other than a potential roommate; and when you remember that you forgot he was coming. 
or when you have to pull your robe tighter around your abdomen just to make sure that you don't give this man a show before you even shake his hand. 
"is this apartment 214?" he asks, looking right at you--and your legs, naturally--with a confused grin on his face, but grin nonetheless. 
so immediately you slam the door. 
you turn around, with wide eyes, face crackling from the movement, and check your phone frantically. yes, it is the 18th, and yes it is 11:32, which means he was supposed to be here over a half-an-hour ago. 
and also you've just slammed the door in his--satoru gojo, the only person who's even bothered to respond to your ad about an available room--face. 
oh, fuck. 
so you groan, refraining from knocking your head against the door just in case he can still hear, and open it again. a little bit less this time. 
"gojo?" you ask, voice rough and slightly irritated. 
"the one and only. i'm pretty sure this is the right apartment," he says, and you don't fail to notice his tone of voice as he continues, "but if it's not, then fate must've brought us together."
you narrow your eyes, hoping that he doesn't notice the specks of dust that ebb from your skin. "you're late." 
"and you're less than dressed." 
"i thought you stood me up." 
he snorts. "so you started an impromptu spa day? or was this supposed to be another perk of the apartment?" 
you glower, opening the door a bit more just so he can see the fury in your eyes. "i don't think someone who doesn't even text to cancel has any right to judge my self-care practices." 
"i didn't cancel. i'm here." 
"you're late." 
"so i've heard..." he drawls. 
you blink at him, and he blinks back--or at least, you're assuming. because he's wearing sunglasses even though it's cloudy outside. 
and he's aggressively taller than you. he might not even fit through the door. 
you don't look away, waiting for him to break. which he does because you're well-practiced in men of his standard. "so, are you going to let me in?" he asks. 
"are you going to apologize for being late?" 
"i'm sorry that i'm late," he says, immediately, with an air of fake sincerity. "i got stuck in traffic. i would've called, but my phone died." 
"really?" 
the smile reappears, as if from magic. "no, but did it make you want to let me in?" 
you glare even harder--which is tough, honestly--and begin to shut the door. until your plan is interrupted by a foot. "excuse you," you say, to this man, who you already hate. and his stupid chelsea boots.
"look, i'm sorry. i'm trying to ease the tension--because honestly i wasn't expecting to get an eyeful this early in the morning, and you seem uncomfortable--" 
you slam the door against his foot again. 
gojo doesn't even wince. "and also, you're, like, the only person with a room in the middle of october. and i... could really use a place to put my bed. so, can i look around, at least? i'll keep my eyes closed every time i'm facing your direction. i can even give you my rent money today if it works out."  
something in his voice already implies that it will. 
and, well. despite your very short robe and your very dry face mask, he is the only person who's even inquired about the room. and you desperately need a roommate; someone to clean up with, someone to make coffee for, someone to argue about toilet paper direction with, and, most importantly, someone who has money and can keep you from getting evicted from the only place you've lived since high school. 
so you sigh. think about moving back home and suffering at the will of your parents. 
it takes about three seconds to say, "will you wait out here while i get dressed?" 
an eyebrow peeks out from behind the sunglasses, as white as his hair. "how long?" 
"ten minutes. maybe twenty." 
"do you have a chair?" he asks and moves his foot from the door. 
and so you close it without answering and rush to your room to find something that's still clean. 
there's nothing that you'll actually wear, but satoru gojo doesn't deserve your fresh appearance anyway. he can have day-old wrinkled jeans and a t-shirt you got when you were twelve. 
as slow as humanly possible, you remove the face mask, trying to keep your hair out of the way, and think about putting on makeup--which you probably would have done, had you remembered he was even coming--but decide not to. 
in reality, it only takes about seven minutes for you to look mostly presentable and get rid of the mugs you left cluttered around the dining room table. 
but you wait an extra four, just to mess with him. 
and then, eleven minutes later, you open the door again to the man leaning against the wall, playing what looks like candy crush on his phone. 
you attempt a fake smile. 
"hey," he says, with that same grin, "you have clothes." 
you drop your face. "i will close this." 
he isn't phased, just pockets his phone and leans in to look behind you at the entryway. 
you roll your eyes, but open the door anyway, and usher him in. he rubs his feet against your welcome mat and toys with a keychain you have hanging from a coat rack, then looks to you, like he's waiting for a tour. which, you guess, he is.
"there's only two rooms, one bath. it's not very big, so if you need a lot of space..." 
"i can manage," he says, and follows you as you walk into the kitchen. "did you decorate?" 
"um... sort of." 
"sort of?" 
"i, uh, had a roommate before and he bought most of the decorations before i moved in. but i've added a few things. i'm not picky about aesthetics." 
gojo hums. "why'd he move out?" 
"we were together and he cheated on me," you say, flatly, as you have been for the past month and a half. "and then told me i couldn't use his netflix account anymore after i broke up with him." 
gojo merely blinks and gestures toward the wall behind you. "so you didn't buy that dancing frog thing?" 
you turn around, rolling your eyes. "no. i forgot that was there." 
"okay, good, 'cause that's hideous." 
you snort, but nod your head and walk down the hallway. gojo's footsteps follow you as you open the door to his potential bedroom. "it's the bigger of the two," you tell him, "but the bathroom is next to mine." 
"did you change rooms?" 
"what?" 
"when your ex moved out. why take the smaller one?" 
"oh," you rub a finger against the wall, rubbing dust off of it. "it was his room before we got together. and then we shared my current room. this was his man... den?" you try, shaking your head. "gaming room? slaughterhouse?" 
gojo snorts. 
"what?" 
"oh, nothing," he says, airy like he's teasing you. "just curious."
you step back so he can walk around, check the carpets for stains, or look for drywall you could've hidden a body behind. but he doesn't, only watches you as you furrow your brows. 
"you're not going to look around?" 
"it looks like the pictures." 
"yeah, but what if there are, like, bugs in the carpet? blood on the walls?" 
"are there bugs in the carpet?" he asks. "blood on the walls?" 
"not that i know of..." 
"great, then it's perfect," he says, and steps out of the room again, whistling as he goes. 
this time, you follow him, like he's the one giving the tour. 
he pauses at the door a couple of feet down. "this your room?" 
"yes." 
"can i see?" 
you scowl. "no. what do you mean 'it's perfect?'"
"i mean, i'd like to live here. it's nice. besides the frog." 
you lean against the wall, trying to inspect him for any mechanical parts. is this a ploy? some joke? "you've barely been here five minutes." 
"twenty with all the time i waited outside..." 
"you can't just take one look and say 'yup, this is good.'" 
"can't you?" he asks, challenging. 
"no." 
gojo's grin seems to widen, impossibly. "well, i'm not picky." 
and somehow you doubt that. 
but you don't get the chance to tell him that, or anything else, because he leans against the wall, still smiling at you, and asks, "so, are we roommates now?" 
"you haven't even seen the lease. or heard about the house rules." 
"house rules?" he repeats, dubiously. like you're making this up (which you are). 
"yes." 
"such as?" 
"no..." you pause, 'cause this is a fickle argument. something about his stupid smile makes you want to argue with him. or maybe it's the hair. or the sunglasses. "murdering anyone in the apartment." 
he laughs, unexpectedly, and sighs. "well, i guess i'll take my murdering someplace else." 
"and... you can't leave any utensils in the sink." 
"okay." 
"and i'm not cleaning up any beard shavings, or sharing my tampons with you, or any people you have over." 
"these are very extensive," he says, unserious. "anything else?" 
"i..." your brows furrow. "no hogging the bathroom. hot water is fickle. and you have to recycle." 
"it might be challenging, but we'll figure it out." 
"these are not negotiable." 
he only continues to smile at you. 
eventually, after staring back with a frown that feels slightly permanent for more than a minute, you sigh again. at least you won't have to worry about moving out. 
"fine. you still want to live here?" 
"mmhmm." 
"okay," and you stick your hand out for him to shake like this is a business transaction. 
and it seems that you'll be seeing a lot more of that grin in the future. 
*
living with satoru gojo is not... well, it's not hard. he's a normal enough roommate. 
he pays his rent on time and doesn't touch the coffee you make in the morning most days--coughing when he does. he man spreads on the couch and watches movies way too loud and doesn't hang his bag up at the door, preferring to, instead, set it on the counter like a maniac. he whistles when he walks, and wears his stupid sunglasses 80% of the time, and grins at you when you're irritated, and, honestly, he's not really half bad. 
he doesn't leave any huge messes for you to clean up (mostly because he doesn't use the kitchen or the dining table ever). he doesn't invite people over that keep you up all night (because he's gone most nights). and, actually, he keeps the bathroom quite clean (even if he takes up well more than half of the shower space with his weird face creams and deep conditioning treatments). 
but satoru gojo is hard. 
it's not what he does, but rather who he is. with his infuriating good looks--taking up most of the fair share for the rest of the population--and his subtle charm, which, if you didn't know who he was, might actually work on you, and his morning voice and his messy hair and just the way he lives. 
like breathing is just what he's supposed to be doing. like he doesn't need to worry about a thing because nothing should matter if he decides he doesn't want it to. 
so easygoing and naturally intuitive and far too exhausting for you. 
because, as a fatal flaw of your own, you love to mess with him. somedays you'll hope he shows up just so you have someone to fight with. just so you'll be irritated instead of stressed, frustrated instead of exhausted. 
it's kind of addicting, in a way. and masochistic, but you've never claimed to be completely sane. 
and honestly, gojo's just asking for it. 
after a mere month of living with his aura around, you come to expect his cockiness. you live to take him down a notch.
so when he's up this early in the morning, whistling like it's his god-given right, you scowl at him just as he enters the room. 
"woah," he says, sliding on a bar stool in front of you. "starting early this morning?" 
"you're banned from talking to me until noon." 
"is this about the ice cream i ate? cause there was only a little left..." 
"no it's--" you pause, frowning at him. "you ate my ice cream?" 
he lays his entire torso on the counter, pathetically. "i was dying, okay? low blood sugar was going to kill me, and i couldn't see anything else but that ice cream and it wasn't even very good anyway, so, really, i was saving you from having to endure the rest of it." 
"you ate my ice cream?" you repeat. 
"i'll buy you more. a better kind. and then you'll understand that i was doing you a favor." 
"i might kill you." 
"i thought we banned homicide from the apartment." 
"i was going to eat that," you whine, shoving his hands away from trying to grab your mug. 
he smiles, too bright for so early in the morning. "yesterday you told me sweets weren't an appropriate breakfast." 
you scoff. "yeah, cause that's all you eat. you need a green smoothie or something in the morning just to keep your heart beating for the rest of the day."
"my heart beats very well, thank you. wanna feel?" 
you roll your eyes and sigh into your mug. "i'll be expecting three pints of ice cream as an apology later tonight." 
gojo has already moved on, typing away on his phone, probably to some groupies he manipulated into loving him. "i can't. it's flip night at laurent's tonight, and suguru has already threatened me into coming." 
"why did you say laurent's like i'm supposed to know what you mean?" 
"laurent's," he repeats, looking at you.
you blink. 
"the bar?" he questions, like you're crazy. 
"okay, sorry, i don't exclusively hang out at bars filled with frat boys." 
"it's very sophisticated,” he corrects, his frat boy nature very obvious. “i mean, i frequent there." 
you laugh. 
"clearly you've never been." 
"i'm still expecting ice cream." 
he sits back in his chair. "i have class all day." 
"like you've never skipped a class." 
"encouraging ditching?" he asks, mock appalled. "what kind of roommate are you?" 
"the kind that doesn't steal her roommate's food. just get one of your servants to pick it up.”
gojo waves a hand at you, and that statement, apparently. and then he types another thing into his phone—to said servants you assume—and grins again. his face must’ve missed the feeling. "how about i buy you a drink instead? you can come with me tonight. meet my friends. maybe make some of your own." 
"haha," you cross your arms. "if they're as bad as you, then i'm good." 
"you'd probably love them. they also like to torment me, even though i'm pretty and perfectly nice to them." 
"i seriously doubt that." 
his eyes--oh, yes, this early in the morning he skips the sunglasses--sparkle like gems. "i have to play wingman for suguru, but it probably won't take long. you can mingle. meet someone. i think you could use a way to relieve some of that stress." 
"oh, you mean the stress that you cause?" 
gojo grins and you realize that you've fallen into his trap. "i'm willing to help out whenever you like," he says, deviously, "you just haven't asked yet, sweetheart." 
"nor ever will," you grind out.
gojo hums and taps his fingers against the countertop. the two of you stare at each other, grin matching scowl, and eventually, he loses the contest. "so, can i plan to steal you away from eternal solitude at six?" he asks.
and just because he's right--in his weird, satoru gojo way--you nod. it might be nice to get out of the house; and meet people other than the lost freshman at work. and because you know that gojo will continue to bother you about it otherwise. he’s a very difficult person.
as if proving it, he grins all pleased with himself, so you add, "but you're buying all of my drinks." before he can get too ahead of himself. 
*
it's not nearly loud enough in this bar. as soon as you walk in, you're sure of it. 
because even with a band up on the stage, singing about loving someone or money or drugs, you can still hear gojo as he flirts with every single living thing in his twenty-foot vicinity. 
he's got his grin on, styled his hair all fancy, and his clothes are signature in the way that you've probably seen him wear the same thing fifty times. maybe in a row. 
but the people in this bar don't care. no, they flirt back like they already know who satoru gojo is. and maybe they do. 
you don't really care, but you do have to drag him along so he can show you where you're supposed to sit and tell you the names of his friends before you get drunk enough to forget. 
it takes three minutes of trailing after gojo like a lost puppy to remember that you hate going out. that you hate everything about your so-called roommate and you should've shoved his invitation down the drain along with him. 
as if gojo can hear this thought, he peeks over his shoulder, smirking at you. "enjoying the view?" he asks, and you try to trip him by stepping on his heel. 
unfortunately, he only swings around, walking backward through the crowd like it's going to part for him. 
oh, wait. it does. 
you frown at him. 
"what? you don't like the music?" he pouts because that would personally offend him, of course. 
"where are we going? i think we've passed that table four times already." 
"i have to say hi," he says like this is obvious. "it's rude to just walk into some place without greeting everyone." 
"do you own this bar?" 
"what? no." 
"then find your friends so we can sit down," you grumble, trying not to lose him in the sea of people. it's unlikely that you've ever seen a bar this packed. more like a club, honestly, but you wouldn't put it past gojo to lie. 
eventually, he does lead you to a table, announcing, with a flourish. "don't worry, everyone, i'm here," while he bows--because of course he does. "and," he adds, "i brought a stowaway." 
you peek around his shoulder to meet three people, all staring at him with the same unamused expression. one, suguru--from the many photo albums and 'trips down memory lane' gojo has bombarded you with--gives you a little wave. the other two just continue to stare at gojo. 
"everyone, this is y/n, my favorite roommate. y/n, that one is suguru," he says, pointing towards him, "which you already know. the short one is shoko, and the blonde one is--" 
"nanami," you cut in, "hey." 
gojo frowns, looking between the two of you. "you know each other?" 
"we have analytics together," you answer, sliding in to sit across them, next to gojo, naturally. "i usually cheat off of his notes." 
"she gets me coffee," nanami adds, like this information is imperative. 
gojo grins again. "why didn't you say anything nanamin?" 
"because i didn't realize." 
"who else could i have been talking about? do you know several pretty girls named y/n? you a player?" 
nanami has a very familiar frown on his face, and is about to say something when suguru seems to kick gojo under the table. "satoru, i told you to stop referring to other people as 'players.'"
gojo merely rolls his eyes. "can't fight the truth," he says.
you almost smile. almost. but your eyes drift over to shoko, who sighs. "how'd you get stuck with this one?" she asks, not harsh, but not quite soft. 
"he promised me alcohol." 
she nods knowingly. 
speaking of, you turn towards him. "you and i both know there's only one reason i'm here." 
gojo flicks your forehead, but stands up. "i'll be right back," he says, "don't miss me too much." 
and you all watch as he walks away, conveniently stopping at least four times to talk to several different people. 
you groan. "he's not coming back is he?" 
"he will," suguru says, not quite reassuringly. "probably. in an hour or so." 
you cover your eyes with your hands and listen as the three of them laugh at you. 
*
it probably is an hour or two later that you see gojo again. 
you'd fallen into smooth conversation with his friends, talking about classes, and dancing, and the fact that you all shared a common enemy. it was easy enough, talking to them, like ripples in a pond. but surely if gojo had stuck around, it would've been more of a tsunami. you could see the appeal--at least for someone like your roommate. they all seemed responsible enough. 
but shoko, after a twenty-second lull in conversation, decided she was better off drinking at home, and nanami quickly agreed. watching them, compared to gojo, disappear into the crowd was a different experience. 
you bite your cheek unnervingly, wondering if it made you a bad roommate to want to let gojo suffer here alone and walk home by himself. 
suguru pats you on the shoulder when he stands up a moment later, brushing his pants. "i'll go find satoru," he says, softly. you feel that same irritation when you realize that gojo had probably lied to you about coming here for suguru. it was almost infinitely more times likely that suguru had come here for him. "do you want me to tell him you went home?" 
"how likely is it that he'll go home with someone else and it won't matter if i wait for him anyway?" 
the dark-haired man considers this with a sly grin on his face. "if i tell him you left, he'll find someone to cling to. but if you're here he'll go home with you. probably drunk, though." 
you run a hand through your hair, waving him off. "it's fine. i'll wait, then. but tell him that the homicide clause doesn't apply to outside the apartment." 
suguru laughs, not questioning this, and walks away. 
you sit there, toying with a glass someone had left behind, watching the people around you dance like it really was a club. with absolutely no one watching. not even god, evidently.
as usual, gojo lied--even though you hadn't really believed him when he said this place was sophisticated. the clear air of stale beer and vomit is enough to prove that.
you almost laugh bitterly, but then a mop of white hair appears in the chair next to you, and his grin is wider, larger than you'd remembered. 
how long had that taken? 
"hello hello, roomie," he sings, leaning close to you. he moves his chair, shuffling across the floor so that he's near enough to touch. "i heard you were threatening me again." 
"you could hear that over the sighs of your fan club?" 
gojo giggles, like he's in on the joke. his breath falls on your face. "i like it when you tell me you're going to murder me, you know." 
"of course you do. how much did you drink?" 
"it's not the quantity," he whispers, "it's the quality." 
"your friends told me you could get drunk off of hand sanitizer." 
gojo leans back, his long legs knocking against yours. "are they spreading those rumors again?"
you kick his foot away from yours but don't say anything. his eyes seem somehow wider right now, even behind his dark shades. almost like you could see them. 
you blink, and gojo does it back. his lashes fluttering just enough to tell.
it almost makes you smile. laugh a little bit at his innocence--especially right now, when he's clearly not himself--some more unperturbed version of who he normally is (if that's even possible). he probably wouldn't even remember if you did laugh at him. but you refrain anyway. 
gojo gasps suddenly. "oh! let's go to the store. you want ice cream, right?" his elbow slides onto the table as he rests his chin on a hand. 
you kick his foot again. "i wanted a drink," you correct, "but apparently you got distracted." 
"'s not my fault," he almost slurs, sadly. 
"are you ready to go home?" 
"i'm ready to leave. so we can get your ice cream. want to share a spoon?" his grin is unabashed. you could tell him that he is a vile, disgusting creature right now and he would probably agree. 
you don't, for whatever reason. 
"i don't think anywhere's open, and i don't want to drag you around while you're this drunk." 
he taps your thigh with a finger. "hey. i'll have you know that i am a very proficient walker." 
"oh, really?" 
"learned when i was a kid and everything." 
"wow, gojo, i'm very impressed," you deadpan, and look around. "do you need to say goodbye to suguru?" 
he frowns. then points to himself. "gojo," he repeats, and into the crowd, "suguru." 
like he's an actual toddler.
you shake your head and stand up, still looking. "can you text him?" 
"i guess," he mumbles, getting out his phone and almost dropping it. he frowns like this is deeply upsetting. 
so you grab it from him. "what's your passcode?" 
"one one one one." you look at him with a brow raised. "cause i'm number one," he answers, pridefully. 
you scoff, but look through his texts anyway, and tell suguru that you're taking him home--and never ever coming out with him again--and then hand it back to gojo. 
he smiles at you. you roll your eyes. 
then he grabs your hand, and begins to pull. "c'mon before they find us," he says, and it doesn't make any sense. 
but were you really expecting it to? 
*
perhaps the aftermath of drunk gojo is even more entertaining than the actual thing. 
shoko hadn't been kidding when she said he was the worst drunk--and even worse when hungover. 
how do you know this? oh, because you woke up at one in the afternoon--perfectly respectable for a saturday--and as soon as you dared to even open your door gojo was already groaning about the noise. so you slam it a little as you leave. 
there's a grunt, like a dying cat, and two minutes later he is walking into the kitchen with slits for eyes and cotton for hair. you're not sure what he's wearing--some video game shirt--but it's wrinkled enough to match your roommate's appearance. disheveled and slightly peeved, he's almost glaring at you--like he's capable of such a thing.
you try not to laugh. 
"where's the bacon?" he asks, almost slipping off of the counter as he leans on it. his hands rubbing at his eyes. 
"sorry?" 
"wheres the bacon?" he repeats, his voice a different register this morning. "i need emergency bacon." 
"so make some. there's a pan and probably a package in the fridge." 
he whines, falling against the counter again. his natural habitat. "i can't make it, i'm dying. you really want your terminally ill roommate to cook for himself?" 
"i want my overdramatic roommate to act like an adult for a change." 
he blows a raspberry, and his face is hidden beneath the tile of your table. you can only see his hair, which looks surprisingly soft for his state. 
"did you lose some pigment in your hair?" 
gojo snaps up, immediately, gasping. he pulls a strand so he can look at it, blinking rapidly. his panic quickly fades, and he blows the strand out of his eyes. "it's just dirty." 
"from what?" 
"i forgot to buy new bedsheets," he grumbles, once again hiding his face. 
"your bedsheets are dying your hair?" you ask, with a raised brow. 
"they're dirty," he repeats, rolling his eyes as he sits up. "i need to go to the store." 
"um..." you look at him as he slumps against his own body, feeling greatly concerned for his survival abilities. "you buy new bedsheets?" you confirm, "instead of washing them?" 
he waves a hand, blowing you, and your clearly audaious sentence away. "bacon," he says, flatly. 
you roll your eyes. "pan," you point, "stove." 
gojo looks like he might start crying.
and it might be his state or the fact that you don't think you've ever seen him like this--in the month you've known him--all lost and confused and a little bit ruffled at the edges. gojo's snark is usually in its top form when you see him in the morning. 
so, just this once, you grab a pan, and turn on the burner. 
"i'll be expecting payment for my time," you say, as you grab the bacon from the fridge. 
and maybe you get your first real smile from your roommate. 
*
you're lying on the couch reading a book when he appears, swarming like a fly. 
"hello, roommate," he says, uncharacteristically pleasant, and then he sits on your legs. you try to kick him, but it proves futile because apparently he's a giant, so you wiggle your way out from under him and sit up, frowning. 
"don't you have a room?" you ask. 
"i could ask you the same thing," gojo tries to tickle your feet, but you move them away before he can. your frown turns into more of a glare. "what?" he asks, "we can't hang out?" 
"no." 
gojo pouts. "but we're roommates," he says as if it's an explanation. like being roommates binds your souls and forever intertwines the two of you. 
"we are roommates because i had an extra room and you had money. that doesn't seem like thrilling grounds for friendship." 
"well, how about the fact that i let you use my hair dryer the other day?" he lays down on the other side of the couch, smirking at you. "that's a friendly thing to do." 
"that's the polite thing to do. i'm trying to train you. speaking of which..." you point towards the floor, "down boy." 
he takes off his sunglasses, throwing them on the coffee table--which probably explains the broken mug pieces you found in the trash the other day--and lays back with his arms behind his head. his eyes are closed. "i can't be trained." 
"clearly." 
you sigh and relax in your corner of the couch, picking up your book again. his presence lurks like a nightmare, but, you figure, eventually, he'll get bored. 
you just can't entertain him. it's like the advice you'd give to a kid being bullied: they only care about your reaction... 
as if proving your point, after twenty-seven seconds of silence, he opens one eye, peeking at you. "whatcha reading?" 
"a book." 
he plucks it right out of your hands, inspecting the cover. how he got across the couch in 0.2 seconds, you don't know. 
"what is this?" he asks, snickering a little. "word porn?" 
you take it back. "it's called romance, gojo. not that i'd expect you to be familiar with anything of the sort." 
he smirks, laying back down. "i have references if you need proof." 
you shake your head, flipping him off, and continue to scan the words on your page without retaining any information. 
seriously, his presence is impending doom itself. 
"it's okay," he whispers, "you don't need to be embarrassed. everyone craves intimacy." 
"i crave my fist on your face." 
he snorts. "that's not very friendly." 
you sigh, dropping the book again so you can look at him and his obnoxious eyes. "look, i'm tired, it's been a long week, and if you don't leave me alone i'll probably lock you outside." 
"probably?" 
"it's that or throwing you out the window." 
gojo laughs once again, but mimes zipping his mouth shut. you roll your eyes and open your book again. your feet are entwined, but you don't mock this--if only because you're sure that gojo will start an argument about it.
the quiet lasts for two minutes and then he turns on the tv. 
you groan and he laughs at you.
*
you're getting used to having him around, at least. and in turn, his friends. because they seem to be a package deal. 
after that night at the bar, gojo--apparently--feels much more comfortable having them over. trying to bake cookies with shoko or interrupting what's supposed to be a study session between the four of them. 
at least, you think, watching this happen, that you're not the only person forced to endure him. 
but it's kind of... nice to see him act like a normal person, for once. to get teased by someone other than you and pout like a begrudged younger brother. the person who invites his friends over for game night (getting aggressively angry every time he loses) isn't satoru gojo, the man whom everyone is drawn to. he isn't some drunk guy charming everyone around him or a roommate that you just happened upon. 
he's just another college student, laughing along with people who aren't nearly as bad as him. 
and, naturally, you find yourself intertwined with these 'hang-outs' because the apartment is small, and you don't want to be left out--no, you choose not to think about how pathetic it is that satoru gojo has more friends than you do, so please don't bring it up. 
and it's on this night when you're not playing uno with the four of them, but rather, watching behind all of their backs and trying to mess with gojo as much as possible. 
you pretend to be idly cleaning in the kitchen, when really you're standing behind him, mouthing to suguru what color he has whenever he's about to win. 
"hmm," the sly-mouthed man says this time, "green." 
shoko puts down a seven, and gojo groans again. "seriously?" he asks, but begins drawing cards. 
you try--and fail--not to giggle behind him. to which, of course, he turns around with an obvious glare in his eyes. "what are you doing?" 
the sink isn't on, and there are no dishes to be seen in the kitchen. nonetheless, you point uselessly to the roll of paper towels on the counter. "cleaning." 
"you're cleaning air?" 
"sorry, i didn't realize i was banned from loitering in my own home." 
he turns back around, looking at suguru for a moment, then back at you. it's very hard to keep the smile off of your face, especially when nanami looks like he's about to break and shoko is pretending to rifle through her cards again. 
how many times have you done this to him? oh, just a mere eight. 
to be fair, it would've ended a long time ago if gojo wasn't such a sore loser. 
he looks back and forth once more. then he frowns. "what are you doing?" 
"do you want me to go hide in my room, gojo?" you ask, trying to scowl. "because i will. i was just trying to be hospitable--" 
"nanamin," he interrupts. "go." 
so another round of cards is placed, and this time suguru plays normally, keeping his face straight to not draw any suspicion. you lean against the wall, enjoying yourself. 
(don't tell anyone, but this is the most fun you've had in a while). 
and then, after a couple of rounds go by, you finally clear your throat. gojo turns to glare at you through his sunglasses and says "go stand behind suguru if you're going to watch. i don't trust you." 
you raise your brows but do as he says. 
and when shoko has to draw the next time, you smile and tap a couple of times on your thigh. 
suguru does his best impression of gojo's grin, and says, "draw four," to shoko. 
she smiles back. turns to gojo. "draw four," she repeats. 
and he stares at the two of them, then the cards stacked on top of each other, and then to you, right across him. "what are you doing? i know you're doing something." 
"satoru, she's just watching--" 
"no, she's smiling." he looks back to you, "you're smiling. you don't do that unless i'm in pain." 
"so you just assume that you're losing cause i'm... what? drawing your cards for you? shuffling the stack so only you get the bad hands?" you cock a brow at him, willing yourself not to look at anyone else at the table. it would only end in disaster. 
"i--" gojo runs a hand through his hair. then he sighs and begins drawing his eight cards. 
and several rounds later--with gojo losing once again--you've begun moving around the table like you're inspecting each player. gojo doesn't let you look at his cards though. 
and it takes a while before he notices anything. particularly after suguru wins for the third time in a row. 
he looks at everyone--brows pulled together, irritated eyes hiding behind his sunglasses, and his cheeks are flushed from how frustrated he is--and as soon as you start laughing at his face, everyone else does too. suguru throws his cards down and shakes his head. nanami shuffles the deck while trying to keep his laugh muffled--but it's there. and shoko is outwardly laughing at him, pointing at gojo and then at you. 
"are you guys stealing the cards?" he asks, almost disbelieving, his voice so childlike that you start laughing even harder. "look at the deck! it's half the size that it was." 
and then he's standing up and inspecting you, sticking his hands up your sleeves and finding dozens of cards hiding there, falling onto the floor. 
gojo gasps in outrage, but it doesn't even matter to you. 
everyone else is clutching their stomachs and gojo begins to pout. "you're all traitors," he's saying, and "how long have you been doing that?" and you almost can't breathe-- 
so yeah. you don't really mind these kinds of nights. and you don't complain about the messes gojo and his friends leave behind. 
*
you shouldn't have given suguru your number. this much is obvious. 
but, to be fair, you weren't exactly thinking when you were talking to him about a self-help book you'd picked up, and he was mentioning a podcast, and then he was taking your phone and putting himself in it--which, in itself, should not be dangerous--telling you that he'd send you a link and that you should let him know if you liked it, and that was that. 
and really, there shouldn't be any repercussions to this. suguru is your sort of friend, and sort of friends can text on occasion. 
except for the fact that he's also satoru gojo's friend. so when you wake up at ten--silently thanking yourself for taking a day off before a week of back-to-back classes and work--he's already texted you, and it's obvious that you failed somewhere in life. 
maybe when you accidentally invited a demon into your house and allowed him to stay. 
from suguru :p : 
hey satoru is supposed to be in class right now and he won't answer me 
can you please kick him awake? 
but maybe it wasn't a mistake. because at least you have a good excuse to give gojo a bruise. 
so you creep down the hall, reluctantly knocking on his door even though it ruins the element of surprise (you're not a monster) and listening as there's no response. 
gojo must be asleep. or dead. honestly, you might've killed him in your sleep--wouldn't be the first time. 
so you peek the door open, realizing now that you haven't been in his room since he moved in, and watch as a figure slithers under the covers almost before you notice. gojo is completely covered except for the foot he's left hanging off of the side of the bed. 
"get up," you tell him, looking around at the sparse decorations he's put up. there are books, candy wrappers, and socks all over the floor, but it's not the messiest room you've ever seen. which is slightly surprising, considering all that you know about gojo. 
he whines from under the cover, turning so you get a view of exposed skin on his back. "sleeping," he says as if you might believe him. 
so you creep over trash and textbooks and pull the blanket right off of him. 
gojo is already looking at you, pouting. his hair is in his eyes and his mouth is puffy--probably from kissing his pillow in his sleep. "what if i was naked under here?" he asks you, very seriously. "i don't let just anyone see that, you know?" 
"you're wearing the same silk pajamas you wear every night." 
he tries to pull the blanket away from you, his fingers peeling yours away. he huffs. "it's the principle. you don't just wake a man up from slumber." 
you snort. "did you travel a century in your sleep?" 
"yes, now go away." and then he falls back into the blankets, his words muffled. 
"you have class, your highness. i've been sent to fetch you." 
one eye appears from under the blanket. "how do you know my schedule?" 
"telepathy. now get up." 
"i can't," gojo fake coughs. "i'm sick." 
"suguru said you'd say that." 
he groans, turning over and muffling a few explicit words that sound like a curse upon his best friend. 
you poke his back. "did you sleep through your alarm?" 
he doesn't answer. his body has gone limp like you might not notice that he's there if he stays still for long enough. so you pull his hair, turning his head towards you. "you're not usually this whiny in the morning," you tell him. 
"why are you so mean to me?" 
you hum, pretending to consider it. "i think it's the hair. i find it pretentious." 
"i could sue you. discrimination is very serious. i've got a good lawyer, too."
"i'll sue back for mental damages." 
he laughs, and wiggles from your grasp. 
you sigh and finally sit down at the edge of his bed, observing the lollipops he's left lying on his bedside table. gojo's bones seem to crack as he sits up with you, moaning the whole way. 
you're silently observing him--with his slightly red eyes and heinous mouth. you're not used to seeing him like this in the morning; usually, he's chipper and annoying. when he walks into the kitchen in the morning you half expect him to start singing. 
but this gojo is tired. he rubs at his eyes. "did suguru text you?" 
"yup." 
"he's a terrible friend." 
you nudge him, almost like an agreement. "why aren't you in class?" 
"what's even the point of going? it's not like i get a reward."
"i think the reward is graduating, but you might have to fact-check that one." 
he nudges you back and then takes your hand. his fingertips are soft as they trace the tendons and veins he can see on your skin. his hands are softer than you'd have expected. his eyes are wary as they look towards the floor, his mouth twisting in displeasure. but he doesn't stop touching you, he does so idly that you almost don't notice. "i have an a in the class," he tells you, "and i already know most of the material so why would i go to every lecture?" 
maybe it's the way he says it; so sure and nonchalant, in his typical over-dramatic fashion. maybe it's just that he's never mentioned any of his classes to you, or the fact that he's taking any. maybe he's just crazy--that's the most likely option--but you're suddenly curious. 
"what class is it?" 
"theoretical physics." 
you whistle, shaking your head. "and you already know most of it?" 
gojo drops your hand and looks at you. his eyes are wide. maybe he's just realized that he's been talking to you this whole time. "when i was a kid my, uh, my dad had a bunch of textbooks in his office that i used to read through every time i got in trouble," he grins, "which was a lot." 
"i can imagine." 
"well, it turns out you can only read something so many times before it becomes ingrained in your brain." 
you pull at his bedsheet. "do you have a test today, or something?" 
"no, suguru just thinks i'm lazy." 
you laugh, because he is. gojo rolls his eyes at you so you don't say it. you're a little bit surprised, actually. you knew that gojo wasn't stupid (or at least, you might've known) but there's something about the proof of it. like you can't just read right through him. like maybe there's still more to learn about your roommate and maybe there always has been. 
or maybe you're just tired, and he's always had the strange ability to draw irrationality out of you. and also he's an idiot.
"i just..." he starts and his smile fades, but only a little bit. he keeps a layer on while he peels a layer off. "i mean, i like the class. math is cool. but i just don't feel like it today, you know?" 
and there's something about his voice as he says it. steady and true, as always, but softer. but compeltely honest. 
and you've heard him complain about a million things, like every time you and suguru talk about something he doesn't understand or when the door isn't unlocked when he gets home, or when you won't add his one shirt to your laundry. you've heard every whine and every groan come from his lips. 
but he's not complaining about this. just confiding. 
and there's such a drastic difference that it takes you a moment to respond. 
but you do eventually. "yeah, i know," you tell him and rest a hand on his thigh to squeeze. 
and the way that gojo looks at you after--like you might just be saying it to make him feel better--is perplexing. his eyes are blue and maybe you've just noticed this--just started to realize that you're actually sitting with him like a normal person. and that he actually looks grateful. 
you shake your head, willing yourself to look away, because maybe there is something sort of magnetic about your roommate. and it feels impossible to only have noticed this now. to realize how warm he is next to you, and how your muscles tense up when he shifts. gojo is looking at you, and it might be the first time.
so you stand up, flicking his chin. "i'll tell suguru that you're puking your guts up." 
"really?" 
"yup. but next time you sleep through a class i'm going to wake you up by pouring ice water on your face." 
he grins. "cruel." 
"and i'll record it." 
you step over candy wrappers and dirty socks as you leave his room, and as soon as the door is closed you sigh in relief. you're probably better off never opening that door again.
*
it's a ridiculously cold night when he shows up. 
you're sitting at the front desk in the library, pretending to study for a mid-term, and trying to smile at the fifth lost library card you've heard about tonight. you got this job at the beginning of the year, and it pays horribly. but at least you can sit around and study, most weekends it's quiet enough to take a nap, and no one tends to bother you when you're drooling all over the reception desk. 
most weekends, that is, because as soon as he walks in through the door--letting in air so brisk that it has the potential to kill you--it gets significantly louder. 
because satoru gojo is not affected by trivial things such as snow, or blizzards, or the fact that the library is supposed to close in less than ten minutes... 
still, you don't really notice him--a rare circumstance that you will question later that night--until he's right next to you, breathing in your ear. 
"slacking on the clock?" he asks, and just for a moment, you almost disembowel him with the pen you're holding in your hand. 
but then you grunt, used to this sort of intrusion from your roommate, and push his head away. "how did you find me?" you ask him, because, honestly, this job is just an escape from his neverending antics at your house (no, it doesn't matter that you got the job before you knew that such an annoying person could possibly exist). 
"i microchipped you in your sleep," gojo says, smoothly, sitting in the chair right next to yours, swiveling around. "i thought i told you about that?" 
you blatantly look at the clock and ignore him. "you know that the library closes in seven minutes?" 
"...and?" 
"so go torment someone else," you answer, standing up with a stack of fileable papers, "i'm busy until eight." 
"i'll help," gojo says, eager as always, and takes half of your stack. "where to?" 
it is from two months of experience that you know he will not leave you alone. even if you chew off his fingernails and keep them to make into necklaces, gojo will follow you around as long as you make it clear you don't want him to. 
so you walk towards the copying room, smiling at all of the sleep-deprived students you pass by and rolling your eyes when gojo does the same. 
"how did you even find the library?" 
gojo walks like he has absolutely no equilibrium; knocking into you every couple of steps, and then falling in the other direction. it must be a consequence of all of his strenuous leaning. 
so he bumps into you as he replies, "tracker," like it's obvious. 
you snort. "no, seriously. i didn't think you knew that libraries existed. aren't you allergic to reading?" 
"hey!" he tries to trip you. "i'll have you know that i am very studious. top of my class." 
"that's why you pay suguru to write your papers for you, right?" 
gojo makes a small noise in the back of his throat. "he doesn't write them," he grumbles. "well, not all of them." 
you snort and open a door for him to follow through.
"my study group meets here on wednesdays," gojo answers, finally. 
"you're a part of a study group?" 
"where do you think i go all of the time?" 
you briefly consider this, setting the papers down. "cemeteries to mourn all of the people you've annoyed to death, probably. or your girlfriend's house." you shrug.
gojo sets his stack on top of yours, diligently lining them up. "i don't do that every night," he drawls, rolling his eyes. and then he winks at you. "and i don't have a girlfriend. thanks for asking." 
you mess up his stack and turn away from him. "sorry, i meant girlfriends as in plural. girlfriends." 
"nope, again." 
gojo follows closely behind you as you begin to lock up all of the spare rooms, turning off lights and looking for any lost items. "commitment issues?" you ask, fake sympathy clouding your voice. 
"sweetheart, if you want me, then just say that. you don't need to pretend to worry about anyone else." his cockiness is infuriating, but you don't even bother to scold him for it. you turn towards him with sharp eyes.
"do i seem worried to you?" 
"no, but you're a bad actor," gojo hums, fingertips grazing along your skin as he inspects your face. "denial is serious. you might want to see a doctor." 
"you would know," you answer, glaring and pulling away from him. the two of you walk as people begin to trek out of the library, no longer held captive by the idea of studying. 
gojo is much too close, as usual, his sweater brushing against yours. 
"how'd you even know i was here?" you ask him, after a minute of silence. 
"please," he answers, grinning down at you. "i got a PI as soon as you gave me my key." 
you squint. "did you actually?" 
he laughs. "no. you told shoko, and shoko told me..." 
you nod, clearing the desk of your things, tossing your bag at gojo for him to carry. "so why are you here?" 
he clears his throat, unplugging the cord to your computer and wrapping it around his hand. "i was walking by, and i thought i'd see if you wanted to come with me for drinks after your shift."
"drinks?" you repeat, taking the cord from his hands. 
"flip night." 
you groan. "i am never participating in that again after what happened last time." 
"it wasn't that bad." 
"i had to drag you home and you almost threw up in my hair." 
gojo smiles. "consider yourself lucky." 
you push him out of the way and put your coat on. then you turn off the lights and push in all of the chairs, gojo not helping at all. "i didn't even get my drink," you remind him. 
"okay, so let me make it up to you."
and his voice is a bit different. still arrogant, naturally, still smiling and easy--but maybe he means it? maybe beneath his, frankly, soft exterior, he feels bad for getting drunk before you could? maybe he's not actually a complete monster? 
you laugh that thought away as soon as it comes.
you sigh. "are your friends going to be there?" 
"yes, our friends are. they suggested i invite you." 
you sigh--again, because the air is quite thin when gojo is around--and consider it. for just four seconds. but eventually, you shake your head. "i can't," you tell him, looping your arm around his so you can drag him out of the building. 
"why not?" 
"i'm tired, and i still need to study for a test on monday..." 
"do it in the morning." 
you give him a blank look. "i won't want to study if i'm hungover." 
"then don't study." 
you let go of his arm, shivering from the cold. gojo, of course, is not wearing a jacket, or even a little bit bothered by the air. "you're a terrible influence." 
he grins. "i get it from you." 
you shake your head, keeping the smile off of your face. "maybe some other time? when it's not freezing, and i don't have a big test?" 
gojo looks like he wants to argue with you some more--which he usually does--but eventually, his grin ebbs into something simple and he nods. "okay, but you have to come next time i ask." 
"no. what if i'm sick, or something?" you definitely would not put it past him to ask you as a method of torture. 
"that's what alcohol is for." he sticks out his hand, too big and too sly. 
but you relent, shaking with him, and rolling your eyes.
"okay, gojo. have fun. do not wake me up when you get home." 
and you turn to walk away, but his hand catches your wrist. "what are you doing?" he asks, brow furrowed. 
"...going home?" 
he lets go of you and flicks your forehead. "you're not walking back by yourself," he says, like it's a crime. "c'mon." 
and he falls into pace with you, even with his longer legs and fervent energy. 
"this is stupid--" you start to complain, but gojo reaches for the strap of your bag, sliding it off of your shoulder. he then slings it on his own, and pulls you in a bit closer by the hem of your jacket. 
he doesn't say anything, just shoves your hand in his pocket, and whistles as he walks you home. 
*
its a couple of weeks later when you're standing at the door again, trying not to open it more than necessary. 
but, really, how wide is too wide? will a half-opened door signal any longing? will he think that you want him back if you open it more than three inches to pass him his box of stuff that he'd left behind and take your key back? 
how do you navigate the trade-off of a frog statue that will probably haunt your dreams till the end of time? 
"key," you say, without any pleasantries, not bothering to even really look at him. 
even though he looks just the same, your ex. still the lying cheater you'd almost fallen in love with. 
is it wrong to miss his netflix password more than him? 
"thanks," he says, and you've probably been standing there with him for thirty seconds when a head appears on your shoulder. 
white hair gets in your eyes, and you try to push gojo away, but he's already intruded on this exchange and you know he's not going to leave. 
"go away," you tell him, not very softly. 
"hello," gojo holds his hand out over your shoulder, because, again, he is ridiculously tall. "i'm--" 
"key," you say again, swatting his hand away. 
your ex looks at your new roommate--with all of his charm and irritating sunglasses and perfectly shaped teeth--with obvious disdain. you want to push both of them out the door and live here by yourself forever, but unfortunately, living prices disagree. 
so you grab the key from his hand, give him a bland smile, and slam the door with gojo's fingers still in between. 
he pulls them back just in time, still almost on top of you, and smiles when you turn around with a scowl. "a friend of yours?" he asks, slyly. he's about as subtle as a third-grader.
"no." 
he messes with your hair idly, pretending to fix it. "i noticed an obvious absence where our dancing frog used to be." 
"i told you, that's not mine." 
"so you gave it away?" 
you cross your arms. he is far too close to you. "you told me it was hideous." 
"it was," he nods, vehemently, and you know his eyes are grinning at you behind those dark shades. "but now there's an empty spot on that shelf." 
"we can put your tongue there when i cut it out," you give him an innocent smile and walk past him to sit on the couch. your pocket burns with the key you put there, metal like an obvious stain on your skin. 
it's not that you care about him anymore, really. you don't, not even when you lay alone at night and think about him. it's more that... he doesn't think about you. he didn't, and he wouldn't have, even if you were still together. 
is it wrong to be wanted by someone whose opinion is worth about as much to you as a penny you could or could not pick up on the street? should you crave being cared about by someone as awful as him?
you want to throw his key in bleach. maybe take a dip yourself.
gojo follows you, throwing himself down on the couch, and brushing you as he does so. he is very used to this kind of proximity, and the annoyed look you give him. "so that was your ex?" 
"yes." 
there's a brief pause, and a nice person might leave it like that. might try to console you, tell you better off. but satoru gojo is not nice, and he probably never has been. "really?" he asks. then clicks his tongue. 
you interrupt whatever obnoxious statement is supposed to follow: "if you're about to say that there are a lot of more eligible bachelors, including yourself, then i'm going to say that you should probably make a zillow account." 
gojo pinches your thigh. "i would never say something like that." 
you look at him, just barely able to make out the shape of his eyes when he's this close. "you told me that last week when i was complaining about dating apps." 
"well, it was true then." 
you roll your eyes. 
"i wasn't going to say that anyway." 
you hum, relaxing into the hold his legs begin to have on yours. despite his abrupt and terrible personality, gojo is very warm. and he's already intruded into so much of your space--your home, your head--that it almost feels normal. 
with his thighs pushing against yours and his fingertips trailing up the back of your neck. 
you should slap him away, but you don't. 
the last person you cuddled with was the same man who gave you the greasy key in your pocket. 
you look at gojo with inquisitive eyes. "really? no bad pickup line? you were going to say something meaningful?" 
"would've blown your mind, but you interrupted..." he teases, and pulls on a strand of baby hair. 
"whatever will i do now?" 
his hand falls from your neck, and if you weren't as comfortable as you are currently, you might think about what he's doing. 
like the fact that you haven't even questioned this, or his following you around, or the fact that he knew you needed someone to pull you away from that door. 
you don't think about that, but maybe you should. 
still, his hand wraps around your shoulder, and you slump against him without question. 
"i was..." his voice is softer, calmer than you've maybe ever heard it. it should jolt you away from him. it should do anything but keep you planted on the couch right next to him. "i was just going to say that i'm glad he's an idiot." 
"getting turned on by my pain?" 
he laughs. "no, but, i mean, your pain my gain." 
you don't even notice it when he slips off his glasses, his fingers curling around your forearm. 
"where else would i find a roommate that threatens me with bodily harm?" he asks, right in your ear. 
it's true enough, you guess. and at least for a moment, you don't want to rip off his arms. 
and gojo mutters something that sounds like "stupid," but you aren't listening.
*
gojo has called in your agreement; that is the only reason you're sitting at the bar, watching him dance around with shoko--purposefully stepping on her toes--and sipping on some drink he ordered for you.
it's terribly sweet and reminds you of lotion but you drink it anyway. it's not like you bought it, and you're sure that gojo wont buy you anything else until finish it. plus it's giving you a light buzz, just enough to feel comfortable sitting there, and not like you want to run away.
it's not as busy as it was last time, the music slightly quieter, the air in the room less stiff. gojo seems less energized tonight--considering that he hasn't abandoned any of you to talk to the houseplant in the corner--even with the dancing. 
which he is terrible at. it's like watching an eight-month-old learn how to stand. or a man trying to impress absolutely no one. his limbs move like they aren't even attached to his body.
"is he drunk?" you're asking suguru and nanami--who have been sitting there longer than you have. "i didn't see him order anything." 
nanami laughs and suguru ruffles your hair. "that's satoru completely sober." 
"...are you sure?" 
"yeah, he doesn't usually drink. even that," he nods to your drink which you're sipping with a wince, "is too bitter for him." 
you raise a brow, watching shoko frown at him, and then nudge him away. "he drank last time i came, though?" 
suguru nods, looking away like he knows something you don't and nanami snorts.
"what?" 
"he was nervous last time," nanami answers. he's got less than a smile on, but it's better than the frowns you've observed sitting next to him in class. 
your brow furrows. "about what?" 
suguru is about to answer, nudging nanami not very subtly, when the very topic of conversation pops up, bumping into you as he squeezes himself in between you and suguru. his presence is an interruption in itself, but he's smiling like he always does, acting like he's been there the whole time. 
you might've pushed him away a week or two ago. now you just sigh and move a little so he can fit.
"did you miss me, sweetheart?" he asks you, leaning against suguru. "don't worry, i'll dance with you next."
"no, and i don't dance." 
gojo rolls his eyes. "everyone dances." 
you look pointedly between him and the group of people dancing in the middle of the room. an image of him almost tripping over shoko makes you smile. "well some people shouldn't." 
suguru laughs and gojo grins even wider at you--his hair is slightly sweaty and his eyes are peering at you over the glasses sitting on the edge of his nose. "let's test that theory," he says, taking a step back. his tone is nothing less than suggestive. and his fingers wiggle towards you, beckoning for you to follow.
there's a twinge in your stomach and you adjust in your seat, frowning at him. "i told you that i don't dance." 
"well, i do. and you owe me for last time." 
you balk. "owe you for what? making sure you didn't get murdered on the street?" 
gojo pouts, his face so unserious and completely genuine at the same time. "you made me dance all alone. you didn't even come watch." 
"you left me--" 
"just one dance?" he asks, leaning in towards you. his eyes are sparkling. "i'll get you another drink." 
"you'll get me that anyway." 
"i'll let you pick it this time." 
"that's usually expected, you know?" 
he ignores that, "c'mon," he pleads, "you know that you want to." 
"i don't know that, actually." 
and then someone coughs behind gojo and you realize that your friends have been listening to this entire interaction and that you'd completely forgotten they were there. how long has he been standing like that? just two inches away from your face? 
"just go, y/n," shoko says, "put the rest of us out of our misery. i've been listening to him whine all night." 
"hey--" gojo turns, his voice defensive. 
but you take another sip of your drink, sighing as you stand up. "fine," you tell him, rolling your eyes when he turns to you with a smile. "one dance, and you can't ask me for anything else tonight." 
his teeth are like rows of knives. sharp and inviting. "okay." 
he holds his hand out for you again, and you take it, feeling that strange pull in the pit of your stomach. 
it's probably just the alcohol, though. 
*
you don't know how long you've been dancing with gojo. 
it started with one dance where he didn't do anything except twirl you around and sway with you, like he'd accepted the fact that you weren't exactly light on your feet, singing along to the music in your ear, making snide remarks about where you'd placed your hands. moving them like pieces on a chess board.
his breath was hot on your ear. condensation on a glass. 
and then you'd gradually moved to letting him lead you, after who knows how many songs, following his steps and not apologizing when your foot slammed against his, or when you bumped shoulders with him, probably creating marks on your skin. 
and then his hands were on your hips, his chin resting against your shoulder, and it felt almost nice to be dancing with him. almost relaxing to forget momentarily about where you were and who you were with. it shouldn't surprise you that you're comfortable with him, but it does. there's no worry about the way you're looking at him or if anyone is watching the two of you--but then again, you might be slightly drunk. 
gojo hasn't commented on how long the two of you have been dancing, and evidently, you've let the alcohol sway you into staying for more than just another song. 
so now, with his lips on your ear, you're almost smiling into him. your heart is fast, and the adrenaline rush you're experiencing is a pleasant thing; if someone ripped out your heart right you wouldn't even notice.
"see?" gojo says, his voice just a murmur with all of the music swimming in your ears. "you're not so bad." 
it sounds like something else to you.
"you won't be saying that in the morning," you tell him, stepping on his toes, but he doesn't pull back or move too quickly. if you thought rationally about his movements you might notice that everything he's doing is slow; like you're an animal he's trying not to scare. 
"i'm used to it," he pulls back a little bit. "shoko does that too." 
"'cause you deserve it." 
he laughs and leans in, so you follow him. 
are you just swaying now? or is he leading you in something more complex? a dance you've never heard of, or a simple in and out? 
you don't know, and you really don't care. 
after a moment, you sigh. "i've never danced with anyone before," you whisper to him, almost like not saying the words at all. it might be a lie, you're not quite sure. 
your words are just thoughts now with no sort of intervention between your brain and your mouth. intoxication fills your lungs. 
"really?" 
"mhm," you hum, "no one's ever asked me." 
"i don't believe you," his voice might be teasing, or serious, or he might be barking at you.
you laugh anyway. gojo's hands are firm against your skin. he feels kind of hazy, like a dream. so you laugh again. 
"you okay?" 
"i think i might be a little drunk." 
he snorts, his breath short. "really? i didn't think you'd be a lightweight." 
"you're a lightweight." 
"yeah, but you already knew that. i only drink when we come here, anyway. nanami doesn't like having to drag me home." 
"you're heavy," you agree, looking up at him. you can see his eyelashes from under his glasses. you can see his tongue as he moves it, and the tip of his nose. you can almost feel it when he swallows.
"sorry," he teases. his face looks different under these lights. it looks different when you're looking at him this close. 
"you're kinda pretty," the words fall from your mouth as you think them, and you grin. "huh." 
it shouldn't be an odd realization, but it is. his skin is almost translucent, and his mouth is sinful. his eyes are wide and bright and satoru gojo could be a sculpture if he wasn't a man.
gojo looks down at you, his brows raised. "you just noticed?" 
"i don't look at you a lot." 
"oh, please," he shakes his head. "i've caught you staring." 
"i only stare when i'm worried that you're a robot planted by aliens or something. you say weird things." 
he laughs, and his hands squeeze your waist. he could stab you in the back right now and it wouldn't even matter. you're not even worried about it. he could flirt with you all night and you don't think you'd quite mind.
you giggle at the thought, heart beating fast with every breath that comes from him. 
"what?" 
"you're not a bad roommate, you know?" you ask him, but maybe you're asking yourself.
"i'm not?" 
"no. you're actually... kinda considerate. my old roommate--my ex--he never wanted to go anywhere with me. he wouldn't have asked me to dance." 
"why not?" 
"i think he thought i was stuck up. or embarassing. or not worth it," you breathe, almost airly, the words are true but they don't matter to you. not like this, pressed up against him. "i don't know." 
gojo's brow furrows. "how?" 
your brows furrow. "how what?" 
"how could he think you're not worth it?" he repeats, and you laugh back. because it's a joke.
"you'd have to ask him." 
"i don't think i'll ever be talking to him," he answers, voice rough. "it wouldn't be good for either of us. and i don't trust people with such terrible taste." 
you giggle at the thought of the frog sculpture, the disgusted look on gojo's face. you can almost see through him.
"you shouldn't," you answer, not even thinking.  
there's a moment where the room is quiet, everyone inhaling at the same time, and then exhaling. you feel like you fit here, somehow. like everything is moving at just the right place. this silence is a comforting feeling, the bubbles bursting in your stomach reiterating it. 
"hey," gojo says, interrupting that feeling. 
"what?" 
"you're a good roommate, too. you're not stuck up. or embarassing." 
"i'm not?" 
he smiles at you. "well, you're a little mean." 
you smile back. "only to you, satoru." 
his face drops, but you don't notice. you lean against his chest again, your eyes fluttering shut. if you were focused enough, you could feel his heartbeat. but you don't. and you don't watch as he swallows. as his voice falters, for only a single second.
but you do look at him when he says, "my friends like you." 
"they do?" 
he laughs, pushing his sunglasses back up on his face. "wasn't it obvious?" 
you shake your head. you're not sure how long you've been standing with him, or if it even matters. you're not even sure if you're still in the bar, or your bed, being covered with your blanket, tucked in by gentle hands. 
how long has it been now? 
"i like you too," gojo whispers, "just so you know." 
and you could be at home, with your roommate. you could be right next to him. it doesn't matter, because you only whisper, "good," and then it's all gone. 
*
when you wake up the next morning, gojo is already laughing at you. 
your headache is a curse. your mind is in shambles. and your body aches with the manipulation of only one person. 
you hate your roommate and his terrible taste in drinks and that he doesn't even say anything when you slump against the counter, not even bothering to make fun of you or complain about how terrible you are when you're drunk. 
he just smiles easily, ruffling your hair.  
and when he starts to cook some bacon in the pan, you don't say anything, but you go and stand next to him, letting him hold you up. 
there are no words. only the popping of oil in a pan. 
and that feeling, of course. because it wasn't the alcohol. 
*
so maybe satoru gojo is your friend. you will not admit this to anyone aloud, but you concede a little bit in your head, because it's a fragile place there, and you're a terrible liar. 
and so maybe you hang out with him sometimes. 
it's not just the game nights or study sessions anymore. you sit on the couch and play with your phone and he sits down next to you. he'll rub your feet, or massage your legs and you let him. 
only because he's kinda good at it, of course. 
and sometimes you'll turn on a movie and he'll appear out of nowhere, complaining about whatever you picked, but laying down nonetheless. and after several minutes he'll move closer to you, resting his head on your thigh. and you might play with his hair, but only because it's unreasonably soft. 
and some mornings when you wake up and make yourself breakfast, not even trying to be quiet, you'll make a little extra. but it's not for him, it's just a coincidence. 
and he stops by the library on his way home from suguru's, or some girl's house, and the two of you will walk home together, talking about class, or the weather, or whatever gojo wants. you let him do this, because it's usually dark outside, and you don't like walking home alone. 
and if he barges into your room sometimes--obviously not knocking--you only complain a little bit. and then you let him lay in your bed and mess with your things. 
but only because it's the easier option, of course. 
and you've missed the feeling of having someone near. and satoru gojo is easy to be around. 
*
"gojo," you gasp, as soon as the door opens in your face. and then you scowl. "don't you knock?" 
he pushes you so he can move past, raising a brow at you. "i live here." his hands are empty, and he's not wearing a coat again. just a weird button-up probably more expensive than your share of the rent. how he's survived over two decades, you're not sure. 
your brows furrow at him. "well, you could give some warning if you're going to kick open the door. what if you broke my nose?" 
"well, why were you standing right in front of the door when i kicked it?" gojo mimics, flicking you away, then looking down to your hands where your wallet and keys are piled up. "you going somewhere?" 
"to the store." 
"it's eleven." 
"why thank you for that update, gojo. i really appreciate it," and then you move beside him to open the door. 
but gojo grabs your hand, making sure to roll his eyes at you where you can see it, and pulls you away so he can step in front of the door. "what could you need from the store right now?" 
"i need stuff." 
he crosses his arms, uncharacteristically stern. "like what?" 
"stuff. girl stuff. you wouldn't get it." 
he gasps, mouth dropping. "oh no, did i steal too many of your tampons again?" 
"first of all, that's against the apartment rules, so you better hope not. second of all, please move," you glare at him. "i need to hurry." 
"you can't leave right now." 
"i believe there's such a thing as free will..." you try and push him away, but he doesn't budge. "and you're not the boss of me." 
"it's too late for you to walk to the store. go tomorrow." 
you cross your arms. "when have i ever listened to you?" you ask him, feeling that familiar irritation crawl up your skin. 
but then gojo is pulling your arms apart and resting them at your sides and saying "stop that," as a gentle chide. and that irritation molds. you push his hands away. 
you want to push his hands off of the edge of the earth just so that he'll never touch you again.
"seriously, gojo, i need to go. they close at midnight." 
"you can't walk to the store by yourself in the dark." 
"i can do whatever i want." 
"then i'm locking you in your room until tomorrow. you're grounded." 
you poke his shoulder. you can't decide if he's serious or not. his voice is always teasing, and you can't see enough of his eyes. and you can't trust a single thing he says. "when did you become so overbearing?" you ask him, trying not to grind your teeth. 
"when i realized how weak you are." 
"weak?" you balk at him. "i'm not weak. please retract that sentence before i accidentally punch you." 
"you can't even push me away from the door. i'll take my chances with your fists." 
"that's because you're irritating me," you tell him, as you try to do it again. "anger distracts me." 
he laughs at you, leaning even further against the door. 
"gojo," you whine, trying to pinch him away instead. "stop being an ass. just get out of the way." 
he holds a hand to his chest, offended. "i am showing concern about your safety," he claims, shaking his head at you. 
"you are ruining my mood." 
"oh, good." 
you scowl. "move. right now." 
"that was very intimidating," he grins at you, "but maybe try again." 
you groan and try to stab him with your key, which he pushes away, still smiling, still completely the worst. 
"i--" you sigh, "i don't like you very much." 
he snorts. 
then you pout at him, fluttering your eyelashes. "please, gojo. i'll be back in fifteen minutes." 
"what is that?" 
you frown. "what?" 
"what's wrong with your face?" 
you throw your arms up, shaking your head. then you mutter another thing about hating him under your breath and finally turn away. you set your keys and your wallet on the counter, pouting as you sit down on the couch. 
gojo is there a moment later, laughing at you. "was that supposed to be convincing?" 
"don't talk to me. ever again." 
you shake your head, fed up with him and everything about this living situation. how are you locked in your apartment right now?
gojo tilts his head back, and then pauses for a moment.  
"then how am i supposed to ask if you want to come with me to the store?" he asks, nonchalantly. "i need some stuff." 
and you should be angry at him--you should probably break one of his fingers or cut his hair off in his sleep. you should tell him that you hate his company and that if he ever tells you what to do again-- 
but instead, you jump up from the couch, smiling at him. "let's go," you say, quickly, before you change your mind. 
and you don't get to see it when gojo smiles back at you, softly. 
*
"hey," he whispers, "you shouldn't sleep here." 
gojo is shaking your shoulder gently, his breath on your face, his voice soft--even in the haze of disrupted sleep. there's a warm feeling in your belly as he speaks to you, an unknowing smile on your face.
"hmm?" you answer, trying to remember who you are and why you're here. who he is.
"it's almost midnight. what are you doing on the couch?" gojo is helping you sit up. his hands are ridiculously warm, and you don't think about how nice they feel on the bare skin of your back. 
"gojo?" 
he laughs. "the one and only. c'mon, i'll tuck you in." 
"did you just get home?" you must still be sleeping, because his hands are so soft right now. and his voice is so quiet--like the creaking of an old house. 
"yeah. are you going to get up?" he's kneeling in front of you, and his face is bare. you almost want to laugh at how bright his hair is even in the dark. 
"where were you?" 
he shakes his head, smiling up at you, and moves from the floor. "c'mon, sit up," he beckons, trying to get you to move your head from its place. you wince. eventually, he gives up and your heart almost disappears when he picks you up, tapping your legs so that you'll wrap them around his waist. 
you do it, but only because you don't want to fall. 
"why are you so tall?" you complain as he carries you to your room, feeling much more awake when you're this high in the air. 
gojo snorts. "i'll take that as a thank you," he whispers in your ear and sets you on your bed. then he sits on the edge and takes your socks off, pulling the covers out from under you. his movements are slow as he covers every inch of skin he can see, his breath the only sound between the two of you. 
it's colder when his hands move, and he looks at you for a moment as if trying to make sure he's satisfied with his job. 
"are you going to make fun of me for this in the morning?" 
gojo grins, squeezing your leg as he stands up. "probably. but only a little." 
"okay," you yawn, blinking as he backs up towards the door. 
"night, sweetheart," he whispers to you, and then a flash of hair is all you see before your door is closed and you drift back to sleep. 
and in the morning you wake up and can't remember how you got in bed. gojo doesn't say a thing. 
*
satoru gojo can say so much without saying a single thing. 
when he burst into your room--surprising you because you hadn't realized he was home--throwing himself on your bed and mumbling something about hating his life, you didn't say a word. 
and he'd sat there for ten minutes while you typed out a paper on your laptop, glancing over to him every couple of minutes, slightly worried because he hadn't moved an inch. 
you've seen a lot of his moods recently. you've seen him excited about some movie you didn't understand, exhausted after a long day of classes, angry when suguru and you leave him out of a joke. but most of that, you assume, is just him being himself. every feeling he has is probably seven times larger than the average person's.
but now that he's groaning into your bed, you can tell, just from the way his body deflates, that there's something wrong. you could see it when he walked in the room, and felt it because he'd told you he was getting dinner with his parents tonight. 
but if you know one thing about him, it's that he won't talk about it if you ask. 
because after a couple of weeks of spending more and more time with him, you'd quickly realized that you didn't actually know much about his life. he doesn't tell any stories about his childhood, or high school years--minus the ones that he tried to suffocate suguru for letting slip. he doesn't mention his parents much, and when he does, it's nothing but the bare minimum. he mentions classes so offhandedly that you hadn't even known how extensive his studies were until suguru was teasing him about an award he'd gotten a couple of years ago. 
he could talk to you for hours on end, but he wouldn't say anything. 
so after realizing this, you'd resorted to asking suguru about it.
that night, gojo was asleep on the floor between your feet. his hand was under his head, and he was snoring loud enough for you to notice. you'd sat down to watch a movie with him after he'd claimed that you and suguru were losers for being tired at this hour and that he was the youngest of you all. 
suguru only smiled a little bit at your question.
"satoru keeps an infinite amount of space between him and everyone else," he'd said softly, into the warm air of your apartment. "even with me, and i've known him since we were kids. his family..." he trailed off, shaking his head.
you'd frowned. "what?" 
"he's always been too much for them, in a way. i mean, you know, he is too much most of the time. but he does all of it purposefully; the arrogance, the bravado. i don't know... i think he just wants to control whatever image everyone has of him. to the extent that his personality is based on pushing people away, just so he can figure out who's actually going to stick around." 
you'd watched him then, with his fluttering eyelashes--his sunglasses lying on the ground next to him--and his bright hair. the gentle movement of his lips as he dreamt. he was softer like this, less forceful, less of a burden, and more of a boy.
and beautiful, of course, but that's an offhanded thought you wouldn't acknowledge.
"so, he doesn't talk to you about--" the words felt wrong, and you almost felt guilty for talking about him like this, with his best friend. but still. "--important stuff?" 
"he talks to me about a lot of things. but, no, not really. i get a long-winded rant sometimes, but not often." 
"then how are you supposed to know anything about him?"
suguru smiled at you, looking between you and gojo like there was a secret he didn't want to tell. he sighed. "satoru doesn't really tell me any of the important stuff because we've known each other for so long. i understand how his family is because i've watched him deal with them. i can guess how he's feeling based on his expression. but for people he hasn't known as long, like you, getting to know him is like i-spy." 
suguru didn’t need to elaborate. you got it.
like trying to find little hints of him hidden between all of the mess. you'd snorted and agreed. 
and it feels even more true now, with him cowering in your blankets. but still, you say nothing. 
you get it, to a certain degree. vulnerability was one of the feelings you liked to push away; secrets were only supposed to be coveted by you. getting close to people was a dangerous thing, risky in its own way. 
but, thinking that gojo doesn't trust you--couldn't trust you... it's more irritating than it should be. and maybe that's just because you're arrogant, and think yourself to be trustworthy. or maybe it's because you trust him, in your own unique way, even with all of his too much and extremeness. 
you don't say that to him though, just like he doesn't say anything to you. 
"hey," you push him with a foot. "are you drooling on my comforter?" 
there's a moment of silence, then gojo rolls over. "not a lot." 
you roll your eyes at him and type another sentence--a collection of words that have nothing to do with the actual essay you're writing, naturally--waiting for him to say something else. 
and, predictably, he does. "why aren't you paying attention to me?" 
"i'm busy, gojo." 
"no, you're not." 
"i am doing homework." 
he looks up at you. his sunglasses are somewhere on your floor. "well, then you're definitely not busy," he grins. 
you swat away a hand that tries to steal your computer. 
"aren't you supposed to be at dinner?" you ask him, trying to seem like you don't care about the answer. 
he sighs again. "canceled." 
"why?" 
"my dad had a meeting or something." 
"oh." 
you let the silence wade for a minute or two, trying to be discreet when you watch his face for any signs of discontent. but gojo just has his eyes closed. his hands above his head. 
eventually, you nudge him again. "did you eat anything?" 
he shakes his head. 
"do you want me to make you something?" 
an eye opens. he turns over and rests his head on his hands, squinting at you. "are you being nice to me?" 
"not intentionally." 
he snorts, poking you, almost in awe. "you are." 
"i'm just trying to make sure you don't die, okay? who knows what you've eaten today." 
he crawls up your bed, sitting right next to you so he can rest his head on your shoulder. and you should push him off, but you don't. "it's okay. i'm not very hungry." 
"that's not what i asked." 
gojo laughs against you, his hair brushing against your neck. 
you shouldn't say anything more. you shouldn't even entertain him and his antics, and you shouldn't even care (but you do. for some, stupid, infuriating reason). 
so you look at him, and your voice is soft when you ask, "you okay?" to him, hoping that it doesn't seem too intrusive. wishing that you didn't actually care if he was or not.
gojo's eyes meet yours, and for a brief moment, you get that feeling again. 
that feeling in your stomach that makes you want to jump away from him. that makes your hands want to shake, and your voice fade. that feeling that you know--too well, too much--but can't get rid of. 
like an itch you're not really supposed to scratch. 
gojo swallows. "yeah," he answers, with no grin, no conceit. "i'm okay." 
and it shouldn't feel like a relief to hear, but it does. you nod, look away, and go back to your computer. back to your actual life, which shouldn't have any satoru gojo in it. 
but a minute later he adds: "i'd be better if you made me dinner, though." 
and you pull on his hair a little. you try to pretend like his smile doesn't fill you with butterflies. 
*
this shouldn't be happening. 
it's the only reasonable thought running through your brain at the moment. the only echo you can discern, the only words you can make out in the jumble of anxiety and horror running through your mind. 
he should not be this close. 
gojo had only picked you up from work once again, his easy smile meeting yours as soon as he walked through the door--you'd been waiting, wondering when he was going to show up. 
at seven-thirty he was there, letting in the cold air and sitting in the seat next to yours, complaining about the fact that you had a job that diverted your attention away from him while you rolled your eyes. 
he sat there for the half an hour remaining in your shift, distracting you. 
two months ago you would've kicked him out. would've called some make-believe security. 
but you just listened while he talked to you about space theories that didn't make any sense. 
and then he'd grabbed your bag for you, turning off the lights before you could, pushing in chairs while you organized the reception desk. 
and his hand grabbed yours before you thought to notice--swinging along while the two of you began the walk home. 
and halfway there, gojo stopped, looking up at something. "hey," he'd poked you. "look at the stars." 
you'd done it, begrudgingly, squinting. "i can count, like, three." 
"there's at least five." 
"why did you stop me to do this? it's cold." 
"because they look nice," he argues, looking down at you. "you have no eye for beauty." 
and, really, you might've agreed with him. you might've pushed him away from you and told him to hurry up and you might've not cared at all. 
but you could see his eyes, just a little bit, behind his sunglasses. and his smile was alabaster, and that feeling--that gasping for breath, trying to hold on to anything feeling--was there again. 
and it was poking you. like a push in some direction. like a laugh telling you that you were too afraid to do anything. 
you were looking at him. right at his face and the only thing you wanted to say was that he was wrong. 
he was wrong because at least you knew that he looked beautiful. 
but those words wouldn't leave your lips--that thought couldn't leave your head--so you were only staring at him. wishing that you'd never let him into your apartment and that he hadn't started becoming a person to you. 
it wasn't fair like this. 
"what?" he whispered, his smile dropping, like he could tell there was something wrong with you. like he knew you that well. 
if he'd kept on smiling, you wouldn't have done it. you wouldn't have pushed up on your toes and leaned into him, and you wouldn't have kissed him like you did. 
like you're doing. 
and it would've been fine because you never would've started this knowing that it would eventually have to stop. 
and even though it takes him less than a second to kiss you back--his lips molding to yours like an automatic reaction--you know that you shouldn't be doing this. 
that you can't be doing this. not with him. not like this. 
so when gojo's hands move to your waist, his breath even in your mouth, you push at his chest. and you want to run away. 
"i'm--" you swallow, trying not to taste him, the bubblegum flavor of him, and almost flinch away. "i'm sorry." 
gojo's mouth is frozen from where he stands two feet away. his hands are in the air like he doesn't know what to do with them. "you..." 
and you've never heard him speechless before. just the idea of it makes you blurt out whatever comes to mind. "i shouldn't have done that," you tell him, and, "i didn't mean to--i don't--" you shake your head. "sorry. i'm sorry. can we forget about this? can we get home because i'm really cold?" 
"you kissed me," gojo says, so simply. 
the words are another blow to your heart. you were hoping that he wouldn't have noticed. 
and wince and watch him, his face as it shifts, moving with each thought in his head. 
"gojo, i'm really--" 
"no," he interrupts, taking a step towards you. 
"what?" 
"that's not my name." 
you frown. "yes it is?" 
he shakes his head. "no, it's satoru. you've said it before, you know. you should keep saying it." 
"when have i said it?" you ask, momentarily blinded by how he demands this. who is he to demand anything? 
"when you were drunk." 
you scoff. "i'm not just going to call you by your first name cause you want me to," you tell him, "who do you think i am?" 
and then satoru laughs, shaking his head at you, his grin full-force on his face. "are you serious? you kissed me and now you don't want to call me by my first name?" 
you freeze. "i said i was sorry about that," you say, weakly. 
you feel like who you've always felt around him. not as easy, not as cool, never as smooth. you feel like a child caught doing something they're not supposed to. you want to run away from him, but he knows where you live. 
"you're sorry?" 
"i didn't mean to." 
he quirks a brow. "you didn't mean to?" 
"it was an accident?" 
he takes another step closer. "it was an accident?" 
"are you just going to keep repeating everything i say?" you ask, voice hard. this must be a dream. 
satoru shakes his head at you. "no, but i have a question." 
"...okay." 
"if i try to kiss you right now, are you going to try and murder me? i know that we're away from the apartment right now, but it would really ruin the mood." 
you stare at him. 
it must be answer enough because he steps forward and he kisses you again. but this time, it feels less mechanical. his lips are soft and smooth as they push against yours--and he pushes like he's demanding something from you. like he knows more about what you can give than you do. 
and he grins against you like he's doing everything exactly right. 
but when satoru pulls back, your eyes stay shut. you try and banish the feeling in your stomach from your body, but it doesn't respond to idle threats. 
"we shouldn't do this," you whisper to him. you don't open your eyes. you don't want to see his face and fall victim to another one of his schemes. 
"why not?" 
"the last time i kissed one of my roommates..." you imply, hoping that you don't have to tell him that you're scared. 
"oh, right," he brushes some hair from your face. he has not moved an inch away from you. "i forgot that you're experienced." 
"wasn't it obvious?" 
he laughs, and then nudges your cheek with a finger. "look at me." 
you shake your head. 
"c'mon, just a little." 
his voice is so soft. satoru is whispering like it's just for you. and you've never heard him like this and you don't think you want to see him. 
"please, sweetheart?" he asks, one last time, and you have to. if only to put yourself out of your own misery. "good. now listen--" 
"don't tell me what to do." 
he rolls his eyes. "listen," he repeats. "i know you don't like me very much. and i know that you only keep me around for my rent money and my pretty face--" 
you kinda want to hit him. 
"--but i've wanted to kiss you for weeks. and i'm not good at the..." he swallows, blinking just briefly. "all of the telling stuff, but i want to be. with you. for you." 
you're not sure if that's the end, or if it's the beginning. your eyes are stuck on his smile, and you're not listening to anything he said. 
he's very close right now. so accessible. and it's just another reason to want to push him away. 
satoru clears his throat, nudging your head with his nose. "and i'm tired of shoko and suguru calling me a coward, so it'd be great if you'd mention that you kissed me first." 
your brows furrow. "you told shoko and suguru?" 
"i didn't say anything," he almost swears. "they tricked me into admitting it." 
"when?" 
"...the day after i introduced you to them." 
you pull away to observe his face. "really?" 
he groans. "stop looking at me like that," he says, "it's mean." 
you almost smile at him again. then close your eyes. "okay."
"havent you listened to anything i've said to you?" he asks, rhetorically. "i flirt with you every day." 
"you flirt with everything." 
"mmm, true," he leans his chin against your head, breathing you in. "now that i've poured my heart out for you, can we go home? it's cold out here, and i'd rather make out on our couch than that bench over there." 
"who said anything about making out?" 
"please," he wraps an arm around your shoulder, and smiles down at you--with all of the typical swagger--and maybe this time you let him. 
*
631 notes · View notes
bitchlessdino · 10 months
Note
okok i'm here for a request
wonwoo as your coworker who you've been having an office romance with - which you have been taking as a joke. everyone thinks you'll get together, and you play along with that. but wonwoo is very serious.
so late night booty call from coworker!wonwoo? or maybe drunk dial to wonwoo and the aftermath the next day (fucking in the office)
Tumblr media
Pairing: wonwoo x afab!reader
Genre: smut
Word count: 3.9k
tags: office au, feturin bartender!chan and coworker!mingyu, mentions of alcohol, exhibitionism, manhandling, unprotected sex, creampie, pet name
author note: hi bee ily bee, you're messed up for this bee. but im worse for producing it gdjgwkjg. anyways enjoy wonu rot
Tag: @shiningstar-byulxx @misssugarlips @tommolex @hoeforhao @homerunhansol @dkakapizzaboy @junhui-recs @svtup @buffhoshi @meowmeowminnie @caratochan @lovebot4han @6969lilithcat @wonuhour @camisun93 @emmmui @toruro
Wonwoo is a handsome guy and it was clear as day to everyone in the office. You like having a bit of his attention. He’s funny and quite friendly with you, but that is perhaps because the first time you met you had the courage to fight with him over the last jam-filled donut in the break room. Since then, there’s never not been a reason to talk as if you’ve known each other forever.
You admit some of the socializing you’ve been having with Wonwoo is more than what you do with any other coworker, let alone friend, but you were just playing along and it was too late to go back. Besides, both of you know what this is. All this talk was simply harmless flirting, playful jokes, and lively banter. You make it clear at the end of it all that there is nothing between you and Wonwoo, that things are as platonic as two subordinates can get.
You can’t say the rest of the office believes that though, seeing as so many of them with jealous glares in your direction or the nudges from the suspecting coworkers that ‘lowkey ship’ you two together as if you were some characters in television. 
“Ugh, you two make me sick. Just get together and have beautiful children already.”
You and Wonwoo shared a harmonious chuckle together, one louder in humor and it wasn’t the man dashing in a silk silver necktie.
“I wish I could, but they like to sleep on the left side even though I also sleep on the left side and I don't know how that would work,” Wonwoo knocks against your shoulder
“Not to mention he likes cats way more than dogs and the fact that we could never really be together because we’re just good coworkers.”
“Right,” he lightly punches, indicating agreement. “It’d be a really bad idea if we were actually together.”
You raise your brows, almost offended. “Woah, woah. I never said it was really bad.”
“But you were thinking about it.”
“Lover quarrel I hear?” Mingyu butts in after getting his morning joe. “They’re always at it at this time of day.”
You roll your eyes at the giant. “All I’m saying is. I and Wonwoo are good together at work. Just work. Dare I say he’s a good work husband, even if he steals the last of the pastries—“
“Will you ever let that go—“
“No—and that’s all there is everyone. Sorry to disappoint.”
The crowd gives their share of snide smirks before dispersing. Mingyu is the last to stay behind, a Cheshire smile on his face. “Sure, you two. Just keep your hands to yourself around here…if you can help it.”
You were about to throw a light kick at the man before he started scurrying off, leaving you and Wonwoo in your lonesome as always. 
“They mean no harm by the way,” Wonwoo points out, “but if it bothers you that much, I can tell them to lay off.”
“Nu-uh,” you reply, shaking your head, “and make me look like a buzzkill? I don’t mind the back and forth. Just don’t anyone get the wrong idea that our jokes are actually serious?”
“Yeah, because it’d be just awful to be caught dating someone like me.”
You groan at his choice of words. “That is not what I said. Stop putting words in my mouth. This is why we wouldn’t work together.”
Wonwoo shrugs, a smile on his face that truly does brighten up a whole room. God, no wonder people think you’re dating him. What single man smiles like that? “Alright, sweet face. Fine. Who cares what they think? We know left from right, okay?” There’s a hint in his tone that says otherwise but you decide to ignore it.
“Okay, good. Anyways, what are your plans tonight? Up for another night of Valo queue?”
“I actually have plans tonight.”
“Oh?” You say wiggling your eyebrows. “Hot date?”
“Maybe? Haven’t met them yet.”
You’re playful expression fades. “Oh, actually? Wow. You must be…excited.”
He shrugs, freshening up his mug. “It’s nice to have plans outside of binge-watching TV at home, so a little bit.”
Your smile can’t seem to reach your ears until you’ve found a way to find the humor out of it. “That sounds nice. I wanna be set up—Wonwoo don’t you have any hot friends?”
Wonwoo feigns thought, clicking his tongue, now noticing the watch on his wrist. “Well, would you look at the time? Back to work.”
You sneer at him leaving you unanswered, following after him to continue the rest of your day. This is how most days went. Outside of work, you shared your personal interests with him, such as video games—perhaps adding to the assumption that you both seem very couple forward—but otherwise, that was all. There was nothing else that made you more than people who work in close proximity together, and not by your own fault either.
Despite this dynamic, Wonwoo is a private person and you only know what he lets you know. Perhaps, that’s why you are so dead set on keeping the formality the way it is. Who knows the type of person he is behind doors?
You try not to be curious about him for the sake of your circumstance, but the thought of Wonwoo and his date stays in the back of your mind, pestering you like an insect well into the afternoon until after work. That’s when you decide to hit up the local bar, grab a drink—or 5–and catch up with your favorite bartender, Chan, to see what he’s up to. He’s normally a good distraction, seeing as he can talk circles around any subject while jumping from one to the other, and you think it starts to make you forget why ever you came in the first place.
However, ‘drunk you’ does whatever the fuck they want, even if ‘sober you’ says otherwise. You seem to forget that every time you go out, perhaps because you think you’ve overcome that part of you after a while of not drinking. Truth was you haven’t.
“Hellooo…”
The dial tone plays on the other end and you continue your incessant greeting until you’re met with a familiar and confused sound. You automatically grin, clutching the device close to your ear in hopes of hearing his voice again.
“Wonwoo…are you and you having fun…”
You hear shuffling in the background, unaware it was Wonwoo checking caller ID to make sure it was you. “Are you doing okay?”
“Me? I’m great…how are you bud? Buddy? Companion? Bestie?”
“Okay. Where are you right now?”
You chortle, glancing back at Chan who is preoccupied with other customers but watching you from the corner of his eye concerned. “Hehe, I’m with a friend. A very handsome friend…”
Chan lets out a light chuckle before finishing up the drink and handing it to the person waiting. He strolls out to you, listening in on the rest of your call as he pretends to clean up glasses.
“Handsome friend?” Wonwoo repeats.
“Very handsome.”
You aren’t sure what’s going on with you, but you feel the urge to simply narrate everything around you, making sure the man on the other line hears every word. 
“Is there a reason you’re calling me, Y/n?”
You hum against the phone in pondering. “Just…because. It’s you.”
“Me?”
“You.”
Chan lightly scoffs at the scene, almost seeing the pink in your eyes as you speak to whoever is on the other end and politely asks for your phone. You pout at him, denying him the device, but with a stern look, you melt into mush and soon obliged.
“Hi, you must be Y/n’s friend right? They’re at the Carat Club right now and it looks like they’ve had enough to drink.”
Wonwoo hums into the phone before responding back cautiously. “Are you the handsome friend?”
Chan grins hearing the hint of jealousy. “Why yes, I am.”
“You don’t sound that handsome.”
“Well, you can judge for yourself because I’m also the bartender here. If you aren’t too busy, I’d really appreciate you getting them home. I’ll keep an eye on them but I can only do that for so long with the rush we’re having.”
There’s a moment of silence on the phone that makes the young bartender think the calls have dropped until the gravelly voice on the other end begrudgingly agrees, quickly hanging up right after. 
Chan sets the phone back to your side, doing what he’s promised to do. After some time, he recognizes Wonwoo right away by his frantic arrival and the bartender waves him over. Wonwoo scans your current state with a frown creasing his eyes. He tries shaking your sides, and see how little effect it makes.
“How much have they had to drink?”
“A couple of cocktails but by how early they’ve gotten here I assume they haven’t eaten. Best to take them home before it goes right through them.”
“Thanks,” Wonwoo, picks you up by your limp arms and supports your side in the direction of the door. When he’s out of sight, he quietly curses to himself about the accuracy of the bartender’s appearance before settling you in his passenger seat.
His goal is to get you rested and safe. Seeing as your driver's license is doctored from the city several hours from where they are, he assumes it is in need of an update, and tries to pry your address out of you. To no avail, nothing useful comes out from your drunk slurred lips and he ends up taking you to his home, dumping you on his bed, and tucking you in. 
You don’t remember anything after the third drink: making that call to Wonwoo, or the debacle of trying to get you home, or his persistence in climbing up the flight of stairs in his own home with the extra body weight. You can only assume the worst when you wake up the following day in a foreign bedroom; your internal alarm was clock accurate as always. You jump from the sheets in pure fear, scanning your surroundings for an owner, when you realize you still have the clothes you wore to work the day before.
Promptly, Wonwoo walks towards the bedroom you occupy from the wide open door and greet you, a smile on his face. “Good, you’re up. Work is in an hour, I’ll get you there.” “Wonwoo, where am I?”
“My place. I would’ve taken you home if you had been more cooperative.”
It takes your eyes some adjusting but you soon realize the lack of clothing on his body, warranting the smooth, broad, and muscular appearance of a Jeon Wonwoo you wouldn’t dare dream of. You gulp at the sight taking it in before hearing him chuckle as he crosses his arms to obscure the view, forcing your eyes on his face that was bare of the thick pair of metal frames you are used to. Instead, you see his eyes, overflowing with warmth you worry you’d stumble upon seeing them. “Extra bathroom at the other end of the hall. I can lend you a shirt.”
“T-thanks.” You say before he disappears in order to get ready for another day.
You quickly finish what needed to be done, taking advantage of the oversized shirt Wonwoo left you behind and somehow making it work. Soon enough you’re off to the office, in his passenger, only time sober and a lot more self-conscious.
“Did I do or say anything weird?”
He lets out a deep, familiar chuckle. “Depends. What’s your definition of weird?”
You try thinking of an answer but none would come up, having you change your mind about getting his prompt response.
“If it’s any consolation, you didn’t get sick like I thought you would, and you were mostly asleep.”
“That just means I was a mess,” You whine.
“Perhaps, but nothing I couldn’t handle.”
“Wait, what about your date? Don’t tell me you—“
“She canceled and I had nothing going on. You called at a good time.”
“I called you?” You question him in bemusement.
“Like I said, nothing I couldn’t handle.”
His repeating that phrase does something the chemical in your brain, retracing the dents of his torso as if they’re right in front you, glistening against the sun rays peaking out of the windows. The smile on his face makes your heart pound a little harder than you’re used to, and now you’re noticing the veins on his hands as he grips the wheel.
You feel yourself swallow. Hand to heart, you pat down as if trying to manually regulate it, but ultimately fail as Wonwoo continues to speak. This must be the embarrassment talking.
“For a second, I thought you called me to confess your undying love for me or something.”
“What?” You ask laughing a little too hard, for once grasping the humor in the situation with difficulty. “Why would you think that?” 
“For one, you were drunk. It seemed likely.” He clears his throat, trying to focus on the road. “And maybe that’s what I wanted to hear.”
Those words settle into you like hot cement, frustratingly slow, and before you finally answer, you’re already back at work, following Wonwoo as you leave the car. When both obviously arrive together, the usual attention has multiplied by tenfold, and the treatment feels different than normal. More flustering a suffocating after the night you’ve had. Wonwoo is the only one to notice as he calmly escorts you to your cubicles, leaving the questions of your coworkers unanswered.
You aren't sure why they’re comments are getting you like this now, making you feel hot, hands clasped against your cheeks like a bashful child, but it bothers you throughout the day, forcing you to keep mostly to yourself. Its then Wonwoo, sends you a note, meeting him for lunch alone knowingly while everyone else planned a meal out. You hesitantly oblige to his request and when the time came around, it’s unexpectantly timid, awkward, and nerve-wracking. That’s not how monets with Wonwoo are supposed to go.
“You’ve been quiet.”
You bow you head. “Sorry.”
“Why are you being sorry?”
“I didn’t think I was bothering anyone.”
You don’t see it, but he rolls his eyes.“Well, you were bothering me. Talk to me, joke around with me, be mean to me I don’t know. The silence is annoying me.”
“...I’m sorry.”
“Apologizing again? Look at me.”
It was difficult given the predicament you’re in, but he forces you to anyways by lifting up your chin between his fingers. You watch a dark storm brew in his eyes and now you can’t bare to tear away.
“Are you going to tell me what’s wrong now?”
You don’t get it. For the past year, you’ve known him, there's only ever been amicable looks or gregarious smiles at a maximum, but in the deep pit of your stomach bubbles a new sensation that has finally festered enough to rise to the surface. You clench your legs in instinct, eyes fluttering back at him as you let each breath take a slow turn.
Intuitive as always, Wonwoo sees that shift in your eyes. It’s disturbing, daunting, and tempting all at once and he decides he can’t take it anymore.
With the break room wall behind you, he pushes you against it, claiming your lips and body until there is no way of escaping. His lips are soft against yours, but moves languidly and impatient, and the grip of his hands on your hips drains the energy out of your lower body. You attempt to chase his vigor, hands against your neck as you suppress your moans at how he kneads your flesh through your slacks only to press your thigh to his side.
“So I’m what’s wrong?” He asks in a low rasp against your lips.
You naturally hold him by the back of his neck, his nose nuzzling against yours. Wonwoo feels your lips part to speak, but he is in a daze by how soft they felt only seconds ago. “You are far from what’s wrong,” you finally answer.
Ridding of inhibitions and doubt, Wonwoo opens the storage closet behind you and shoves you in to lock you both inside. His hands run up your body needily, desperate to taste the skin underneath the shirt you’ve borrowed. You help him undress the same way he does to you, and your pristine pressed Van Hausens fall near your feet like rubble.
His lips then fall underneath your chin, trailing your neck, he refrains from leaving too much pressure but is almost swayed by your natural scent mixed in with his shampoo. He roughly plants you against a mostly empty shelf, the ice cold metal somehow burning your skin. He helps you tug off your slacks finding that sopping cunt that’s been dying to have him discover them since this morning.
“For me? Just for me?” He wastes no time shoving his hand down the frail fabric of your underwear and gliding his thick digits over your wet slit. “I don’t know if I can keep my hands to myself this time.”
Your voice reveals itself, saying his name in a way you wouldn’t dare let another person hear as long as you lived. He repeats the action, watching you crumble in front of him like award-winning cinema.
“I never heard you speak like that to me. I could get used to it.” He find your ear, his cat-like smile forming before his lips closes around your skin and his whispers cause the ripples of chills down your spine. “Say my name like that again for me, darling.”
You tremble under his touch, feeling his fingers dip into your heat enticingly. “Won…wooo…”
He lets out a soft and gentle moan, and the heat of his breath fans your pebbled skin. “Such a pretty little thing. I’ve dreamt how you’d be like this for me so often.”
“You…have?”
He presses a lingering kiss on your neck. “More than I can be proud of.” He curls his digits before taking light jerks, his thumb rubbing your arousal around the circumference of your clit. He drinks in your pretty pants, teeth grazing back at your skin. “You like me touching you? Aren’t I being such a good work husband?”
Your eyes screw shit, mouth etching open to give him a well-deserved praise, “So goo—“
“Where are my keys,” a voice breaks outside the door.
Wonwoo seizes his fingers from you and clamps them over your mouth, your arousal basically coating your lips and his eyes staring back at you intently.
“Where did they go anyway?”
Wonwoo shushes you with pursed lips. “Better be quiet.” His tone is stern but his actions say otherwise as his zipper comes down in a fraction of a second. “It’s in our best interest not to get caught, right?”
His name muffles under his palm, squeezing the life out of your cheeks as he exposes the bulging cock that’s been fighting away at him since he kissed you. Your eyes dart in their direction, beading perspiration across your forehead, and you feel yourself clench around nothing as his cock draws closer to your fluttering heat.
Your eyes double their size and then shrink to half the size once he’s inside you. His raw, long heat pushes into your core inch by inch, and you feel the necessary evil to bite down his palm. If Wonwoo was bothered by it, he doesn’t show it as he claims you with deep strokes, having your hands rest against his firm pectorals in reluctant trust. His low grunts can only be heard by you and the slight fog in his glasses is apparent the closer he thrust into you, even in the dim closet lighting,
Outside these walls still is a confused Mingyu, not foreseeing the event occurring behind a door mere feet away. “Maybe, they went somewhere else for lunch.”
You audibly squeak within the tight space and Wonwoo shushes you again, knocking back into with a curt but harsh slam before forcing your walls to hold his cock inside you like a natural plug. “You’re gonna get us in trouble, darling. I’m not done with you yet.” An accumulated thrill runs through your veins at the thought of being caught, taking every thrust with pressure and liquifying at the devious smile on your rumored boyfriend’s face. 
“No they’re not here,” the intruder says to a voice unheard from their distance. “…Coming!”
His footsteps noticeably scan the perimeter once last time before they retreated further and further away.
“Finally,” Wonwoo breathes out, “now I have you all to myself.” Although he states that, he doesn’t let go of your mouth, in fact, you swear his hand is getting tighter and now his face closer, finally processing the spearmint on his breath “We should still be careful. Can you be quiet for me?”
You quietly nodded, grasping at his body desperately, gesturing for him to keep going.
He scoffs. “My darling being impatient?” He pulls out almost his entire length before shoving back into you, earning a feeble tremble. “My. Cock. Making. You. Needy. Hm?”
You nod back at him, holding back your tears, nails digging into his shoulder blades.
“Eyes on me, darling. Your work husband is need of your attention while I fuck you senseless.”
Shallow breaths escape your nostrils, finally meeting his eyes, which seemed to have lost the thick barrier of his glasses somehow already set on the shelf behind him. “Would you like for me to cum in you?”
You gingerly nod.
“Will you listen to everything I say when I let go of your mouth?”
Like a glitch, you nod the same exact way.
“Such a good little darling.”
His cock fills you up as naturally as breathing does. While his lips are home against yours, tongue entangling to the point it becomes sex itself. Your hushed moans are music to his ears and bear motive as his cock plunges deeper and harder inside you. He doesn’t mind how you bit his lips, nor how your nails drag against his back, rather he revels in it, doubling over you to push his cock inside you deeper until you're unable to contain your screams and he’s forced to silence you again.
You whisper how you’re close and it’s a natural drug, encouraging him to only ram inside you and claim the sweet sound of your orgasm coating decadently around his cock. He handles it rather gentlemanly, fairly as his cock is next to ripple in climax, shooting his thick over churned honey until it fills your heat until the point of fully occupancy. His arms come around you in a firm grasp, bruising your lips until you’re imprinted with the memory of him. 
You let out light pants, awkwardly thanking his promptly done tasks before you’re whisked away again by his perfect, salvia-sheened lips. “That was very…superb.”
Strange adjective but it’s done the job, you think.
“I’m glad you think so,” he chuckles in a way that tells you things are far from over and you’re proven correct when he brings up your legs, thighs crushing his cheeks that splays the most impish smile. “But we still have 15 minutes of our lunch and a man’s gotta eat.”
Part of my 3K Follower StayCation!!!
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girlgenius1111 · 4 months
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don't you trust me?
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r gets into a fight. mapi is not happy.
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Most of the time, you enjoyed living with Ingrid and Mapi. It was fun, and you liked that you didn't have to be responsible all the time. You were 18, so technically you could live on your own, but the older girls had insisted you stay with them at least another year. You'd fought it initially, but then they got Alexia on their side, and there wasn't really much you could do.
However, today, their presence in your life only complicated matters. You walked in the front door, on your way back from tutoring, trying to sneak past them, right up the stairs to your room. You needed to fix your face, as well as you could, before they could see you. Really, you weren't sure you'd be able to do enough, but you needed to try.
You were finishing your school, which you did online, but you saw a tutor every week to ensure you were doing alright in everything. There were other kids there that saw the same tutor and they'd taken to... hating you. Really hating you.
You weren't sure if it was because they were jealous, you were living out your dream career, after all, or if they were just mean. Either way, they'd been teasing you for months, most of which you could ignore, as you only saw them once a week.
Today, though, you had lost your patience. It was already dark when you walked out of the building, and they'd walked behind you, cracking mean jokes per usual. You weren't sure why it bothered you more today, but it did. You turned, letting out a string of insults that they were left astounded at. You'd turned back around, heading in the direction of your apartment again, which was only a short walk away, when the girl whose mother you'd just insulted grabbed the back of your shirt, wrenching you backwards. To be completely honest, you'd thrown the first punch. It had been instinct. What followed was a fight you were honestly kind of proud of. Your face didn't really tell the full story; you looked like you'd been jumped, but really, you'd held your own against three other people.
You felt kind of guilty, because you'd pushed things to become physical. If you'd ignored them like usual, they wouldn't have taken it further. Instead, you couldn't keep your mouth shut, and now... well.
Surprisingly, you made it to your room, quickly shouting out a greeting to the older girls before shutting your door behind you. You look in the mirror that hung over your dresser, inspecting your face. Your hands were heavily bruised around the knuckles, but nothing was broken. Sure, your nose looked a little lopsided, one of your eyes was swollen shut, there was a cut above your eyebrow that hadn't stopped bleeding, and you're not sure the one on your lip doesn't need stitches, but you're fine. Completely fine.
You hear Ingrid's footstep just a second too late, and she's knocking quickly before opening your door. You freeze, as her question about what you want for dinner dies on her lips, jaw dropping open instead at the sight of your mangled face.
"Y/n, what the hell?" She asks, clearly making a big effort to stay calm. You don't really know how to answer, but she doesn't wait for you to. Instead, she grabs your arm, pulling you out of your door and down the stairs.
"María. María!!!" she shouts, and you attempt to stop in your tracks, but she continues to pull you along.
"Que paso?" Mapi asks, walking around the corner into the living room where you are standing with Ingrid.
"Ask her." Ingrid says, gesturing back to you. Mapi's eyes fall on you, widening, before she swears, moving closer to take your face roughly into her hands.
"Fuck, Mapi, that hurts," you cry out.
"Sorry, sorry," she says, hands softening on your face. Ingrid is standing behind her, looking furious, and you know you're in trouble. This isn't the first fight you've gotten in, but it had been a while. Your teammates had made it clear they wouldn't tolerate any of that. This was the worst it had ever gone for you, that much was clear by the state of your face.
"What happened?" Mapi asks, voice dangerously low.
"I got in a fight." Maybe you should have answered what you knew she was really asking, but your face hurt, they hadn't even heard your side of things, and they were already mad. You weren't really in the mood to talk about it, either.
At your response, Ingrid lets out a long exhale, turning to go into the kitchen. Mapi is staring hard at you, and you shrink under her gaze.
"What happened?" she asks again.
"The other kids that see my tutor. They don't like me very much."
"Did you swing first?"
"Yeah, but-"
"-Y/n, we've talked about this!" Mapi says, raising her voice slightly.
"I know, but-"
"-no buts! This isn't acceptable, you know that. What were you thinking?"
You weren't really expecting Mapi to get that mad at you, honestly. Normally she let Ingrid deal with your fights, and yell at you, but Mapi hadn't ever yelled at you before. You felt your eyes, really one eye, begin to water, and you look down, avoiding her gaze. It's not fair, she's not even hearing your side of things.
"I'm talking to Alexia and Jona, and you're going to be benched until you prove that you can act like an adult," Mapi continues. You know that this is likely an empty threat, so you stay silent. It still hurts, though, that she just assumes the fight was your fault.
Ingrid has reentered the room, an ice pack in hand, and she walks to your side, tilting your chin back up to inspect your wounds.
"María, calm down," she says, giving her girlfriend a look.
"No. This is ridiculous. I thought we could trust you." Mapi seethes, and you pull away from Ingrid, a flash of anger flowing through you.
"You don't want to hear my side of things? You just assume I started it? That's not fair, Mapi. If you want to yell at me, do it later, when my face isn't bleeding." You spit out, both girls looking startled at your outburst. Without another word, you turn, slipping shoes on and grabbing your keys, before walking out the front door, ignoring their calls for you to come back.
Angry tears are flowing down your face, burning the various cuts they come into contact with, and you wipe away at them as carefully as you can. Your feet carry you down the block, and you're knocking on the door before you can even really think about what you're doing.
It doesn't really make sense; logically, Alexia would be just as mad at you as the other 2 were but you didn't know where else to go, and you knew she would patch you up. You wanted Ingrid to do it, really, but you couldn't go back there now, not when you were so upset.
Alexia answered the door, gasping when she sees you.
"Pequeña? Que paso?" she asks, reaching a hand out to pull you inside. Her hands fly to your face, inspecting your wounds, and she's bringing you to the bathroom before you can answer.
"I got in a fight."
"Pequeña," Alexia sighs, applying pressure to the cut on your forehead, and to the one on your lip.
"It wasn't my fault! I hit first, but if I hadn't, they would have. There were 3 of them, I was just trying to be smart."
"3?" Alexia asks, eyebrows flying up.
"And then I got home and Ingrid saw and she got Mapi and Mapi yelled, and she didn't even ask me what happened really, she was just so mad," you cry.
You hear a frantic knock on Alexia's door, and she sighs, instructing you to hold the towels to your face. "Did you run out of there?" She asks over her shoulder, heading for the door.
Clearly, Alexia knew who was at the door, as did you.
"Yes."
You hear Alexia open the door, and tell the girls that yes, you're in the bathroom. You wouldn't have expected her to lie, but still, you don't want to see Mapi. At least this, Alexia seems to understand, as Ingrid comes down the hall alone, pulling you into a hug as soon as she's close enough, ignoring the blood getting on her shirt. You collapse into her, and she holds you up, hands rubbing your back softly.
"I'm sorry, elskling, we should have made sure you were okay, and heard you out before we got mad." She speaks the words into your ear, and if you had been mad at her, the guilt in her voice would have been enough for you to forgive her.
"I'm not really mad at you," you mumble. She laughs at that.
"I can't blame you for being mad at her. She just worries about you. You scared her, she doesn't like seeing you hurt." Ingrid says, and you nod, knowing she's right. "Cmon, let's fix your face." She grabs the first aid kit, and your hand, pulling you out into the living room where Mapi stands with Alexia, who appears to be scolding her. That gives you some satisfaction.
Ingrid sits you on the couch, and Alexia joins her, both girls inspecting the cuts, and your nose. Mapi stays against the wall, staring at the floor.
"I don't think either need stitches," Ingrid says, and Alexia nods in agreement.
"I don't think her nose is broken, either. Just swollen." Alexia notes. You sigh in relief. No hospital.
They use Alexia's extensive first aid kit to clean and bandage your wounds, holding ice against your face until you push their hands off, insisting on doing it yourself. They stand, then, and look meaningfully at Mapi, before they walk into the kitchen, mumbling about getting you water.
Mapi moves to sit next to you, and you're startled when she looks up at you with tears in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry, pequeña. I shouldn't have yelled. Seeing you like that scared me, and I freaked out. I didn't mean to be so harsh, really."
"It's okay," you say halfheartedly.
"No it's not. I'd like to hear what happened though." Mapi says, shaking her head. Ingrid and Alexia wander back in, handing you a glass of water, and sitting down on the couch.
You look between them, realizing that if there were any 3 people who you'd trust, it's them. You tell them the whole story, starting months ago when the teasing began, up until today. Mapi and Alexia look prepared to track the kids down and harm them, while Ingrid looks torn between murder, and giving you a hug. She looks like she's decided on a hug when Mapi beats her too it, pulling you into her arms fiercely. The guilt on her face is evident, and even though you want to stay mad, you can't. So, you hug her back, and she sighs with relief. When she pulls back, you meet Alexia's eyes and shudder at how upset she looks.
"Why didn't you tell us this was happening? We could have stopped it." She says through her teeth. You can tell, though, that her anger is directed at the other kids, and not you.
"It wasn't a big deal, I could ignore it."
"It doesn't matter, y/n, you shouldn't have to handle it. You're never going back there again, we'll find someone else to tutor you." Alexia declares, and Mapi and Ingrid nod their agreement. You weren't going to argue with them. With that settled, Ingrid and Mapi take you back home, after you thank Alexia for her help. They send you right to bed, arguing that you need rest to recover well, and you roll your eyes, but listen. You've just settled in bed when there is a knock on the door.
"Come in?"
Mapi's head peeks through the door, smirking at you, and holding two bowls of ice cream.
"Don't tell Ingrid, it's not a cheat day," she says and you grin. She settles on the other side of your bed, handing you the bowl, and you guys eat in a content silence. Not 5 minutes later, there's another knock on the door, and you and Mapi hide your bowls under your blanket.
"Yes?"
Ingrid opens the door, eyes on the 2 bowls of ice cream in her hands. "Don't tell Mapi, there was only enough left for 2..." she fades off, looking up to see Mapi reclined on your bed, staring at her with her jaw dropped open. You laugh, throwing back your blanket, exposing the first bowls of ice cream. Ingrid and Mapi both start to scold the other, but realize neither of them have a leg to stand on. Instead, Ingrid climbs onto the bed on your other side, handing you the second bowl of ice cream, which you accept happily.
Ingrid mentions something about the training schedule, then, and what time you all need to be up the next morning, and you sit forward, dropping your spoon into your bowl with a clatter. You look horrified.
"What is it?" Ingrid asks, somewhat panicked at the expression on your face.
"I have to go to practice tomorrow. Everyone is going to see my face and freak out. If you two were bad, imagine everyone else's reaction," you groan, already hearing the different lectures you were going to hear.
Ingrid and Mapi chuckle at your panic.
"Remember the last time you got into a fight? And you went to practice with that black eye? Practice was delayed 20 minutes so everyone could yell at you, and Pina got a picture of your face printed on t-shirts." Mapi remembers gleefully.
You glare at her, a look she returns.
"Maybe we can get it on the back of our jersey this time," Ingrid suggest, fighting a smile.
You roll your eyes, going back to your ice cream, dreading the next day, but also not. Having people care about you, worry for you, was a good feeling. Overwhelming, yes, but overall, a good feeling.
-----
lowkey hate the ending of this but im tired and i couldn't think of how else to end it
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a-edgar-allan-hoe · 1 year
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Wild Horses
Simon “Ghost” Riley x Female Doctor!Reader, Soap x Reader Part 2
Part 1 , Part 3 , Part 4
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A/N: Y’all have asked and y’all have received. Enjoy! Let me know what you guys think, I always love to hear your thoughts! Reblogs are much appreciated! 😊💜
Summary: Imagine being the new physician assigned to the team and a certain masked individual takes a new keen concealed interest in you. The two of you are too awkward to function.
Warnings: language, fluff, angst. This one might be a little sad and Ghost is a bit of an ass-jerk so be prepared.
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As mentioned before, Ghost completely stays clear of your vicinity after stepping out of your office. It’s not that he hates you. He’s just slightly irritated. With himself? Or is it you and that pretty face of yours and your comforting voice and your goddamn politeness and your accent. To be honest, the whole team adores your accent. He can’t tell. Remind you, this is a man who has probably never been shown any affection or tenderness so don't expect him to fall for you on the spot. This man needs therapy, like a lot of therapy. All he knows is that he doesn’t want to go through whatever it is he is feeling, finding the whole thing to be an inconvenience really. And because he doesn't know how to understand or face whatever these emotions are, he just buries it. It's easier for him that way.
Poor dude couldn’t even sleep last night, staring at the ceiling of his room and haunted by the idea that he accidentally offended you. This man may have a cold exterior but your scalpels are colder and sharper than the devil's jawline. He almost couldn’t blame you if you decided to inject some foreign substance into his bloodstream and make the whole thing look like it was a stroke. Wait, could you do that? Bloody fucking hell. This man spends too much time with his thoughts I swear.
The man spends the whole night trying to assess his feelings, or rather his attraction towards you, convinces himself you're just another pretty face. The man may be touch-starved but he knows there are other methods to handle his needs, even though it's been a long time since he's slept with a woman, like a really long time. But even then, that situation was different. There was never any intimacy involved, like a quick business transaction that finished just as quickly as it started. It only left him feeling as empty as he was before. Not to mention, he doesn't do well with human interaction and that one and only moment he had with a woman daunted him more than it needed to, and so he has remained abstinent ever since. And if he were being honest with himself, you're just a distraction. And how do you handle distractions? You steer clear of them.
So what does this man do? He does what he intended to do. He avoids you at all costs. Oh, is that you walking towards their small, makeshift kitchen to fix yourself a bagel in the morning? Guess what, he’s doing a full 180 and lurking behind a wall like Michael Myers and his stupid hedge, waiting until you’re finished so he can make himself his morning tea.
Not only that but he makes sure to take extra good care of himself, Vitamin C supplements or multivitamins, whatever it takes to keep himself in best health. He even looks up on Google for extra tips to prevent himself from having to send himself in. He had heard of the saying “an apple a day keeps the doctor away” and goes out of his way to buy an apple during his morning runs. But the poor chap has it all mixed up because when you walk into your office the next morning, you're surprised to see an apple just sitting there on your desk.
Ghost doesn't know that it's supposed to be the other way around and that the apple is actually supposed to be for himself. He doesn't bother to search up the meaning, nor does anyone bother to tell him because they don't even know that he's doing it in the first place. So every morning he goes on his run, he goes out and buys an apple, and so every morning you find one placed on your desk.
The first time you saw the fruit sitting there on the table where you worked, surrounded by your scattered paperwork, you were confused no doubt. You picked it up curiously in your hand, inspecting the bright red fruit before giving a shrug and biting into it, after you wash it of course. You think it's just a small little token of thanks from one of the men. Possibly Soap considering how flirty he was yesterday. Alejandro doesn't seem like the type to give fruits. He's more of a red rose and a bottle of wine kind of man.
But as days go by, each day you find an apple sitting on your desk. And as thoughtful as this gesture is, at this point, considering the amount of apples you've eaten, you're either going to have serious digestive issues or die of cyanide poisoning, as if you don't already have IBS. So what do you do? You start to collect the apples each morning, deciding to throw in your own twist to this gesture until one evening, the men come back from one of their missions to find a freshly baked apple pie and a stack of paper plates and some utensils sitting out on a table for them, including a small little card with the handwritten words "bone apple tea". What in the hell.
"What in the fucks is bone apple tea." Gaz scrunches his nose at the writing on the little card.
They're all standing around at the table staring at the pie with confusion written across their faces. All except Ghost of course, the way his eyes slightly widen once he sees it. His gut is telling him you're behind it. Hm I wonder what gave it away.
"What’s this?" Alejandro asks, tilting his head at the thing.
"Looks like apple pie." Gaz answers.
"Yes I know that." Alejandro remarks. “But what is it doing here?"
"Doubt it's from any one of you muppets." Price speaks up. He knows damn well none of these men know how to bake. There’s only one person here whose hands are skilled or nimble enough to make the braided trim on that crust. Not to mention the detailing in the center, like the way you carefully placed little leaf designs made from the crust on top of the braided design. Yup this was definitely you, unless someone else here had a secret talent they had been hiding.
Literally why are these men acting like the pie has poison it. As if Graves sent it or something. Just shut up and eat the pie before it gets cold you himbos.
"So who made it?" Soap asks, looking towards the others for answers.
"This," Alejandro chuckles after finally realizing, "this was made by the hands of a woman."
"Who, y/n?" Gaz quirks a brow, you're the only woman here.
How in the hell did you get the means to bake a complete fucking apple pie in a place like this? They always heard doctors have skilled and steady hands but what the actual fuck.
"Well don't mind me." Soap literally cuts a big ass slice for himself before going off to devour the thing.
The boys watch Soap basically almost moan once he takes a bite of your pie as he goes off yelling out something along the lines of "well tidy scran", before helping themselves to a slice.
Ghost is the last one to cut himself a slice. He was hesitant at first before finally giving in, plus he also got back from a mission and he's hungry. So when he digs in his fork and has his first taste, it's kinda like that scene from Ratatouille where the food critic Anton Ego finally takes a bite of Remy's food and is reminded of his childhood, except Ghost doesn't have a childhood.
Let me tell you these men are obsessed with your pie and are practically fighting over the last slice like a pair of siblings so don't be surprised when you wake up the next morning to the see that the plate that your pie was in is completely empty without a single crumb in sight. Jesus. Did they lick the table down too?
Also I think you may have just given Ghost a newfound sweet tooth. When he went back to his room that night, he's debating on whether he should keep his daily routine of giving you apples, so far it’s kept you away. What he doesn’t get is that you made a whole damn pie out of the apples he gave you when they were actually supposed to be for you, or him, if you look at it from his distorted perception. But wait. What if you know it's him, and that's why you made the pie in the first place? A way to a man’s heart is not only between the forth and fifth ribs, but it’s also through his stomach. And as much as he wants to deny it, he also kind of secretly wants you to bake another one. It's almost as if he's completely forgotten why he placed those apples on your desk in the first place.
So what do you see when you wake up the next morning? An empty plate and yet another apple sitting on your desk. Okay what the fuck. You've let it slide all those times but now you have got to know who's pulling this shit. It’s not that you hate apples, but the conception that you have no clue who’s behind this is making you start to view the poor defenseless fruit as an object of taunting and torment. And to be honest at this point, you're beginning to think this is some kind of joke. So with the apple in your hand, you head towards the common area where the others are currently settled.
“Okay who did it?” You call out once you enter the area.
Crickets chirping.
All heads snap towards you to see you standing there with an apple held in your hand. They're almost stunned to see you wandering about. They rarely ever see you since you're usually locked up in your office or your room.
The men have done a lot of shit so just what is it that are you asking. They stare at you with not a single thought behind their eyes, that is until their blood runs cold at what happened last night. Was the pie not meant for them? Shit.
“Did what?” Gaz gulps, trying to play it off as nothing happened.
"Who keeps leaving apples on my desk like I'm about to host a county fair?"
"Come again?" Price asks, not that he didn't hear you, but it's probably the most anyone has heard you speak that isn't related to your work. Not only that, but they’re so used to hearing your “doctor” voice that your normal voice is a whole pitch lower and almost sounds foreign and alien to their ears. Not that they’re complaining because they honestly love hearing it.
"Someone has been leaving apples on my desk every single day." You repeat yourself more slowly. "And I'd like to know who."
So you're not mad about the pie.
Ghost immediately snaps his head away from your direction and nearly chokes on his tea. It's almost a miracle he doesn’t get whiplash from how fast he turns away.
The others are still staring at you, a tad bit scared of the expression that sat on your face. They couldn't make out if you were upset or not.
"Well?" You ask, leaning against the doorframe with your hand stuffed in your coat pocket while your other hand tossed the apple about in the air.
"Couldn't be me." Soap answers.
The others shake their heads as you squint your eyes at each and every one of them, trying to decipher the culprit. "Whoever it is, I will find out." You take a bite out of the apple before tossing it to the nearest person, who happened to be Alejandro, before starting to leave the area.
Alejandro catches the apple between his hands, staring down at the fruit with a chuckle to see where you had bit into it before taking a bite of his own.
Soap can't help but clench his jaw at Alejandro's cockiness. Ghost just turns away unbothered, it’s none of his concern. Or at least that’s what he tells himself.
"Wait you're not mad about the pie?" Gaz calls out after you.
"What pie?" You turn back.
Wot
"The pie....from last night."
"I have no clue what you're talking about." You put on your best innocent expression before walking away.
The men snap their heads towards each other. Have they been poisoned? The longer they stare at each other, the more panicked they get.
Alejandro glances down at the apple you had thrown in his hands and is so close to spitting out the bite he had taken.
"I'm kidding." Your voice nearly makes them jump out of their skin as they turn to see your head popped through the doorway. "The pie was from me." You walk away again before turning back around. "Oh, I almost forgot. I have your blood results so if you're free, come see me when you get the chance."
Shit. Ghost thinks to himself after hearing you mention the blood results. He is hoping his blood sample got demolished in some shape or form, but the way you didn't even try to pull him aside to break the "unfortunate" news tells him otherwise. He's just not going to show.
The men watch you walk away in silence after your little moment of humor. They almost don't know how to react. The way the warmth of your voice blended with the obscurity of your words threw them in for a loop.
All except Ghost have no clue who has been sending you apples, but whoever it is that is sending you the fruit, they think that person is trying to win you over. So what started out as some misunderstanding on Ghost's end has now turned into this whole peacocking ordeal. Now it's a competition of who gets you better gifts in order to gain your affection, mainly Soap and Alejandro and even Gaz, but mostly Soap. Price still shows you appreciation for your work and what you do in his own way.
Poor Ghost was just trying to manifest "an apple a day keeps the doctor away". So who’s gonna tell him?
Anyways, when you return to your office to work on your paperwork, the boys go out to get you a little something before meeting up with you to go over their bloodwork results. Despite Soap and Gaz's efforts, Alejandro is the first to leave and the first to return. And just as Soap returns with his little gift for you, Alejandro beats him to it, a smirk playing on his lips as he enters your office with a red rose in hand. Poor Gaz wasn't able to find you anything special so he gets you a cool looking rock he saw instead.
Soap is practically fuming. If you squint hard enough, you might see smoke coming out his ears.
You hear a knock on your door and look up from where you sat at your desk to see Alejandro stepping into your office, a sly smirk on his lips as he holds out a rose.
"Alejandro." You quirk a brow. "What's this?"
"For you, hermosa."
"Oh?" You cock your head back in surprise as you take the rose from his hands. "What for?"
"Oh just a little way of showing appreciation." Alejandro leans against your desk.
"Why thank you Alejandro" You blink, trying your best to push down the blush that tries to creep itself onto your cheeks.
"My pleasure."
You decide to place the flower inside the empty vase you had already set out from before when you moved your things in. "I had been meaning to get some flowers to brighten up the area."
"There's no need" Alejandro smirks. "I'm afraid the rose doesn't compare to you. You do that all on your own."
Little do you know Soap is listening in on the whole thing with a frown. If he pressed his ear any closer he'd fall right through the door. Sure the Scots have their special charm but Alejandro is different and has the most rizz out of all of them, and Soap is fully aware and has always heard they make better lovers and that only adds to his panic.
Now you're definitely not able to hide the heat that spread through your face. You can't tell if it's the state of being flustered or just social anxiety. Well they weren't wrong about Alejandro having a way with words. "Geez, thank you Alejandro. But there really is no need for flattery."
"For you, anything hermosa."
Omfg this dude.
You look away from his strong gaze, managing to shove your flustered state away and stopping yourself from releasing the sharp wit you inherited from your father. Clearing your throat, you open up his file. "Well that really is kind of you Alejandro. And since you are already here, I have the results from your blood work."
"Oh? Everything should be good yes?"
"Well yes, for the most part but-"
"But what?" Alejandro looks confused. What's wrong with his blood?
"Your cholesterol levels are pretty high." You open up his file and read over his results.
"They are?"
"I'm afraid so, but not at a dangerous level. You should probably cut out some of that fried food and red meat and watch your butter intake. Nothing too serious though. Add some greens into your diet, as well as some nuts and whole grains and definitely more fruits and veggies and you're good to go." You hand him a copy of his results before giving a look of grimace. "But watch out on the fiber though. Too much of it can lead to increased bowel movements."
"Increased what?"
"You know, a case of the shits."
The way Soap pulls his ear away from the door and slaps his palm on mouth to keep himself from letting out the most offensive laugh known to mankind. If only you could have seen it. Is he going to bring this up in Alejandro's presence? Maybe.
Alejandro looks over the papers you gave him. "Wait really?"
"Yeeaaah." You give the poor fellow a sympathetic smile. "But hey, everything you need to know is right on those papers, so as long as you cut out the foods mentioned and get a higher intake of the others listed, you'll be back to normal in no time."
"Oh uh. Thank you y/n. I appreciate it."
"Anytime Alejandro." You smile. "You know where to find me."
The way Soap nearly trips over himself as he backs away from the door after hearing footsteps, as if he wasn't eavesdropping on every thing.
Alejandro opens the door and walks out of your office, eyes glued to the papers while Soap is just standing there trying not to be noticed.
The moment Alejandro is out of sight, Soap goes over and knocks on your door.
"Come in." You look up and smile to see Soap. Over the course of the few days since you first arrived here, you were to quick to warm up to the young Scotsman, finding comfort and humor in his personality. You enjoyed hearing him talk about just about anything, and his accent always helped to make whatever he had to say all the more interesting. It really is a good thing he does most of the talking since you make a better listener and love to hear what others have to say.
Soap knows you don't talk much and how you prefer to listen and hear stories, so he always makes sure to keep you entertained. This man is 100% golden retriever energy. Also he calls you lass and lassie and you just eat that shit up, he loves how you blush and that small restrained smile appears on your face whenever he says it. Don't worry, so would I. "Soap! You can have a seat if you want, this will be brief."
"Oh uh, I've actually got you something." Soap hands you a small box.
"Oh?" You quirk a brow as you take the box from his hands? What is it with everyone giving you gifts? Are they in on something you're not? "What is it?" You ask as you open the small box to see a bunch of what looks to be biscuits.
"Scottish shortbread." Soap smiles, rubbing his hand on the back of his neck. "I brought them along with me from back home but I thought you'd like them with your morning coffee."
"Wait, are you sure you don't want them for yourself? I feel bad."
"Nah. I can always get more.......if-when I go back home. You keep em. It's for ya. Think of it as a welcoming gift.....for all ya done, and the pie ya made for us."
"Soap, I don't know what to say." You give the man a heartfelt smile. "Thank you.....really, it's very thoughtful of you. It'll give me a variety from my bagels."
"Don' mention it." Soap places his hands behind his back before noticing a small framed picture you had set up on your desk that definitely wasn't there before. "Is that you?"
"Hm?" You raise you brow to see what he is referring to and seeing him gesture to the photo.
"Oh. Yeah, that's me as a little girl." You glance at the photo as a soft smile appears on your face. It was a picture of you when you were a little girl around the age of 5, when your dad took you on a camping trip to Zion. The two of you were sitting near the tent he had set up overlooking the mountain range with you sitting in his arms while he played his guitar, wearing that same old baseball cap of his that you had grown accustomed to seeing as you grew up. The longer you looked at the picture and relived that core memory, glancing at the crooked grin that sat on your little face and the way your father beamed, the more your face began to match the fond look that radiated off your father's eyes as he looked down at your giggling state.
"That's quite the smile you got there." Soap teases, chuckling at the expression you held in the photo.
"Oh please." You roll your eyes, knowing exactly what he was joking about. "I know I looked goofy. My baby teeth were falling out."
"And that's yer dad?"
"Yup. That's my old man."
"Ya have yer father's eyes." Soap smiles at you, knowing now where you inherited that certain warmth held in your eyes that was able to put the coldest man at ease by just one look.
You let out a soft chuckle, glancing down at the ground to blink away the tears that have yet to form before looking back up at the soldier. "I've been told."
"Where was this taken? The scenery is absolutely braw."
"That was taken at Zion National Park in Utah. My dad had taken me there on a camping trip."
"It's absolutely gorgeous."
"Maybe I'll take you one day."
"Ya mean it?" Soap turns towards you, a grin forming on his face.
"Why not? It's been a while since I went, not since the photo."
"I think you've just made my day lass." Soap smirks before turning to the other photo. "And I'm guessing that's you as well." Soap gestures to the other photo of you around your middle school years that your dad had taken of you, wearing a wet suit as you sat on your surfboard, a grin on your face and your hair matted with salt water while one of your hands formed the shaka sign. "I dinnae ken you surfed."
"Oh yeah, surfing was my life. This was back when I had caught my first wave in Hawaii. My dad was so proud. Took me out for shaved ice right after and couldn't stop bragging to everyone there about how effortlessly I had tube ridden that thing."
"Your dad sounds like a great man."
"The best."
Soap notices the way your smile ever so slightly dropped at one of the corners, as if some sadness had managed to overcome whatever memories that lied in your head so he clears his throat, deciding not to press on the subject any better. "So how does my blood look?"
"Good actually." You blink, his statement reminding you of what you were going to do since he stepped into your office in the first place. "Your levels are all pretty balanced." You hand him a copy of his results. "As for the muscle cramps you mentioned, try to get a higher intake of electrolytes like potassium, magnesium, and calcium. And most importantly, don't forget to stay hydrated and drink lots of water."
"Aye ma'am. I'll make sure of it."
"Thank you Soap."
"No, thank you." Soap gives you one last smile before heading out. "I'll see you around."
"Bye."
It was not long after Soap left that Gaz entered next followed by Price, hearing you go over their results with intent ears. You actually really loved the little rock Gaz had given you, he had even drawn a smiley face on for you. You thought it was really cute despite his embarrassment in not finding you something better. And after the two left, there was only one person left that had yet to show up at your door. Simon 'Ghost' Riley.
Not wanting to pressure the man who looks like he'd stab you for looking at him the wrong way, you decided to stay at your desk, working over some paperwork of your own until the time comes when he decides to show up whenever he sees comfortable.
Picking up your mug, you decide to get some more coffee, leaving your office and heading to the kitchen area to brew yourself a new cup. Looking up from your feet, you see Ghost walking walking in your direction in front of you.
"Ghost!" You call out to him, or as much as you can call out. You never were one for raising your voice, despite the many times your previous teachers had urged you to speak up, displeased with the way you preferred to keep to yourself as opposed to your more extroverted peers. But even when carrying out their commands to speak louder, you always hated doing so, thinking it drew too much attention towards you. It's a wonder you got through med school and became a doctor in the first place.
Ghost had heard you calling out his name and immediately his muscles tense. The last thing he wanted was for you to see him because that only meant one thing, being dragged into your office to go over his blood results until something else insulting slips from his lips. I promise he doesn't hate your guts! So in order to evade you, this man does the first thing that comes to mind, he walks straight into the nearest room, which just so happens to be the shared showers. Simon you dumb fuck. Let’s hope Price isn’t butt ass naked in there for Simon’s sake.
You blink, standing there with your mug that your friend from college thought would be funny to gift you when you started med school, the one that had the words "I have a PHD" in bold colorful letters with the finer print "pretty huge dick" right below it (of course you never used that mug back at the hospital or else you'd hear about it).
So with your mug in hand, you watch the masked man walk straight into the room where the shared showers were. Huh. Well that's weird. You try to give the man the benefit of the doubt, thinking he just did not hear you. Maybe he'll stop by later. So shrugging off what just happened, you head into the kitchen to make yourself a fresh cup of coffee. God an iced coffee sounds good right now.
Once you had headed back to your office, finishing up your work and taking little breaks in between to read your book or snack on something, an hour turned into two, and so forth. Until you looked at your clock and it was already past the time of sunset. Jesus. Where did this dude go? Getting up from your chair, you step out of your office, holding the door open and seeing not a single soul headed in your direction. What in the-
With furrowed brows, you step back into your office, staring down at Ghost's results that just sat there waiting to be picked up.
"Goddamn it." You hiss between your teeth. You have no idea what his issue is or why he avoids you as if you spit in his fruit loops or tea or whatever. But if he keeps this up, it could interfere with your own job. Looking around at your desk, an idea pops into your head as you grab two things that lied there, a sticky note and a two dum-dum lollipops, a sugar cookie flavor and a butterscotch one.
Heading out of your office, you head towards where the men's rooms are located before stopping at a certain particular one, surveying the area around you to make sure no one sees you before staring straight at the door in front of you. Taking out your pen, you write on the note "please stop by my office when you get a chance", making sure to add your initials in the corner before taping it to his door along with the two lollipops, hoping the candy will be some sort of bribe.
"God I hope this works and he doesn't shoot me in the head." You mutter out before heading back to your own quarters that was separate from the men's due to standard protocol. Throwing off your coat and your clothes, you threw on an oversized t-shirt and some sweats, eating a microwaveable dinner in your own room before getting ready to go to bed. There was nothing you craved more than to collapse onto the mattress and bury yourself under the covers. And as you finished brushing your teeth, turning off the lights and getting into a comfortable position under your blanket, all you could do was stare at the ceiling above you.
Little did you know, that same night, in that same moment, there was another who could not sleep, staring at the ceiling as you did now. He had saw the note that you had left him on his door, as well as the two lollipops. It almost annoyed him, whatever it was you were showing towards him. And it did not help that the note had smelled of you, of that perfume that oh so enriched his senses. The man literally has your note laying on top of his bedside table along with the lollipops. He'll throw it out first thing tomorrow he tells himself.
"Oh come the fuck on." You moaned as you turned over onto your side but to no avail. No matter how hard you tried to shut your eyes and shut out any thoughts that attempted at keeping you awake, you just could not fall asleep until you finally give up. "Jesus fuck shit fuck." You hiss to yourself as you throw the blanket off you, sitting up on your bed and throwing on your sweatpants before getting up. Usually on nights like this where you couldn't sleep, you'd find a way to calm your nerves, whether it be reading or drawing or listening to a comforting audiobook.
So, grabbing your pillow and blanket, you open up your closet and grab your father's acoustic guitar, going back over to your bed and staring at the framed photo of your dad that sat on the bedside table before taking that with you as well. Leaving your room, you make sure to be as quiet as possible, looking both ways before heading up towards the roof of the building.
When you were little and had trouble sleeping, your dad used to take you outside to where the two of you had built a little fort, where the two of you would lay under the stars, brushed over by the cool night breeze as he played his guitar, singing old folk and slow classic rock songs until you finally fell asleep. And as you stepped onto the roof, craning your neck to stare up at the stars above you, you were reminded of those moments and the peace it gave you. Setting your bedding down, you prop the picture of your dad up next to you before sitting down with the guitar in hand.
"Hey dad." Your voice is a whisper as you look down at the photo of your father beside you. The photo was taken not even a month after you were born. He had taken you to the fire station he was stationed at, excited to introduce his team to his new precious baby girl, his first child. You could almost say it was your favorite photo of him, sitting on the front bumper of the firetruck in his uniform with you bundled up in a pink blanket in his arms.
"I know it's been a bit of a while since we've last talked." You sigh, forming your fingers into a chord on the fretboard of the guitar. "So to make up for it, I'm going to sing you one of the songs I always used to sing. You know the one, it's one of my favorites, and yours too."
Despite his efforts to fall asleep, Simon had ended up stepping out of his room, walking about the grounds to somewhat ease his mind. This was obviously nothing new to him, he always had trouble sleeping. And during those nights he had trouble sleeping, he'd take a walk to help clear his head. He found comfort in the silence of the night, when everything and everyone was asleep. He would usually go to his favorite spot on the rooftop, where he would seek refuge under the obsidian skies and the silver stars.
As he goes up the stairs that lead up to the roof, he stops at the sound that comes from beyond the door, what sounds to be someone singing and strumming the guitar. Curious to know who the hell had taken his spot and had the radio playing, he goes up further to investigate. So imagine his surprise when he finds you there instead, wrapped up in your blanket and strumming against your guitar, singing The Sundays cover of Wild Horses.
"Childhood living is easy to do The things that you wanted, I bought them for you Graceless lady, you know who I am You know I can't let you slide through my hands" Your voice is ethereal as you sing out the lyrics, your face molded into these deep emotions you can't quite explain.
"Wild horses couldn't drag me away Wild horses couldn't drag me away
I watched you suffer a dull, aching pain And now you've decided to show me the same No sweeping exits or offstage lines Could make me feel bitter or treat you unkind
Wild horses couldn't drag me away Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away
Faith has been broken and tears must be cried Let's do some living after we die
Wild horses couldn't drag me away Wild, wild horses couldn't drag me away
Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday Wild, wild horses, we'll ride them someday."
During the entirety of the song, Simon stands there in the distance behind you, hidden in the shadows, entranced, and can't seem to explain the tingles he feels washing over his body. He thinks he has intruded upon you and wants to leave you to your solitude in what seems to be an intimate moment for you, and yet he can't seem to be able to get his feet to move. Instead he's watching you with this newfound interest. He had never expected you to play the guitar as you did, nor have the voice that you did. So as you finish your song, he almost trips over his own feet trying to back away, scared that you might somehow notice that he had been there this whole time.
"God I miss you dad." You wipe away at the tears that start to spill down your cheeks despite your attempts to wipe them away with the back of your sleeve, scanning your eyes over the stars that scattered across the sky, imagining he was up there amongst them. "I miss you so much."
Regaining his footing, Ghost is careful to open the door leading back into the building, that is until he hears you let out what sounds to be a choked sob. He turns his head back towards you, seeing you bring your knees up to your chest as you cry out, mumbling something he can't quite understand. With his hand still holding the door open, he looks down at the set of stairs, turning his head back towards you for one more time before going down the steps, being careful to shut the door without any noise possible.
Part 3
Tags: @souls-rain @euovennia @i-wish-we-could-stay @depressedacidtest @gh0stm3g @thequeenofbigmacs @k1llerch4n @abbiesxox @feraltiddies @wand-erer5 @1redheaded3dragon @anisa269 @joceymoo @mango-corner @classickook @trueee33 @sockertop @lupskelly @chxbits @kuwizo @sluxm3ozt @tobybestupid @anarchygoose @lez-zuha @thatoneautor0123 @marvelmysterywoman @ella-error505 @awkward-0 @ariessux @kermitdefroghere @urloverx @alldaysdreamers @rat-elbows @nananarc @watersquirtpewpewboomm @izzyisstuff
4K notes · View notes
webslingingslasher · 5 months
Note
I know we’re all obsessed with frat!peter, but are there any instances where nerdy!peter gets a lil mean too?
for the first time ever, peter is ignoring your call. there are times he's unable to answer, but you know he's purposely watching his phone ring before he silences it.
he's actively ignoring you and you want to scream.
peter doesn't get mad at you. but he is. and it's making everything worse. you can't apologize if he won't talk to you.
it's been two days.
'if you don't call me back in an hour i'm coming over.'
'and yes, that's a threat.'
peter must be really mad. because he didn't answer.
'hi, is peter around?' you can tell may wants to shout the truth, instead she shows solidarity to her nephew. 'sorry, honey. he's out right now.'
you challenge her, 'can i wait for him?' may isn't playing your games, 'he didn't say when he'd be back.'
it's not may's fault, but you still huff at her. 'he has to talk to me at some point.' you see a flush of parent coat over her features.
'sometimes when someone is hurt, they need to think about how to react to it before it gets worse.'
you feel like crying, 'is he really that mad at me?' may slowly closes the door, 'i'm sorry, but peter isn't home.' you want to catch the door and bark out to peter, who you know is holed up in his room, but you respect his space and leave.
it was all your fault. you pushed his harshest barrier and you swear you didn't mean to, it was just the most hurtful thing you could spit out in a moment of fury.
instant regret. you swore you heard peter's heart break the second you finished. his crushing silence hurt more than an equal blow. he just calmly grabbed his backpack and left. and you let him, you were speechless, you couldn't believe the things that came out of your mouth.
you retreat with a few texts.
'i'm sorry, peter. i really, really am.'
'i won't keep bothering you, just talk to me when you're ready.'
'i love you. and i know you love me too, so you don't have to say it back tonight.'
and he doesn't. not when you check before bed and not when you wake the next morning. you've never felt peter's cold shoulder before, but it's icy and stings.
you'd see him on campus and he couldn't ignore you in person, right?
there was only one way to tell, and it was when you saw him sitting at an outside table. scribbling in a notebook while he looked over a textbook and some sheets, he never looked so pretty.
it's selfish, but you want nothing more than to kiss him.
'hi.' sitting backwards, your back hit the edge of the table. if he tells you to fuck off you'll make a quick escape. looking at his side profile he shows no reaction, he was expecting you to join him.
'hi.' peter doesn't share the interest to look at you.
'wanna talk?' you hold your breath, hopeful he'd say yes and you could do your best attempt at damage control.
'not really,' his calm nature unsettles you. you'd rather he spit in your face.
'can i talk?' peter didn't want to talk, but he might listen. you just wanted to make it okay, or try.
you think he agrees just to get you to leave quicker. 'sure.'
anxiety scratches your insides, you've never been so ashamed in your life. it was an odd feeling wanting to do nothing but hold peter close to you while you apologize, while also knowing he wanted nothing to do with your touch.
'i'm sorry. i've never been more sorry for anything in my entire life and i don't know how to make it right. i would do anything to take it back, if i could go back in time to stop myself i would.'
it's unfair, but the reality of the situation hits. tears prickle at your eyes. you just feel so bad.
'i don't know why i said that, and i regretted it the second it left my mouth. i could try to come up with a million excuses, but i said it and i'm taking accountability. i know it doesn't help, but, like...'
you close your eyes, when you open them a tear races down your cheek. you're quick to wipe it. it's not about you.
'i am really fucking disgusted in myself. i'm ashamed and embarrassed and i know i broke your heart. peter, i... i took the darkest part of you and weaponized it. i broke your trust and i am a really, really, really bad girlfriend.'
you deserved the silence. 'you're mad at me and that's fair. i can't say it enough, but i want you to know i'm sorry.'
the last sentence caught his attention, peter shakes his head and laughs under his breath.
'you see, the thing is, i don't think i'm mad. i'm just really fucking hurt. you told me ben was just waiting on someone to put him out of his misery.'
you wince. it sounded so much worse coming from his mouth, it was like the words burnt him and left a bad taste behind. they were seared into his brain. there was nothing in the world to justify what you did.
'you were right. you broke my heart and trust in one go. how do you fix it? i don't know, but i can't even look at you right now. talking to you feels like i'm pulling glass out of my skin.'
'i'm glad you're disgusted with yourself, because i am too.'
there was the blow. it wasn't half as harsh as yours, but it dug deep. you couldn't blame him either. it's entirely too selfish, but you need to know if there's something to work for.
'are you going to break up with me?' you sound sad but you wouldn't blame him if he said yes, you would only blame yourself forever. you don't like how long the silence was, it felt like he was actually thinking about it.
'i don't know.'
three words made you feel empty. the future of your relationship and happiness was a gamble all because you couldn't shut your mouth.
'okay.' it wasn't. 'i know it seems pointless now, because i already failed at it, but i'll never say anything like that ever again. i never, ever wanted to hurt you like this.'
for the first time in three days, peter looks at you. he looks tired.
'you did. that's why you said it. you were mad and i wasn't feeding into it, you got even more upset and said the most hurtful thing you could've to me.'
you're desperate, 'i know! but i swear it wasn't on purpose! i didn't know what i was saying until i said it, and i mean, c'mon peter, you know me. i've never said anything like that before, and i won't ever again.'
peter throws you a bone, maybe he really heard the desperation in your voice. 'i know you're sorry, i know you feel terrible and you wish you could take it back. but that doesn't make it okay. and i need you to understand that.'
you nod quick, 'i do! i understand, i promise.'
peter sees it differently. 'i don't think you do. if you did, you wouldn't be here begging for me to say everything's okay.'
his words make you pause, you see his stance in a different light. your apologies have done nothing but make peter feel like he has to accept them. may said he needed space and you haven't given him any, instead hounding him with texts or forcing him to listen to the same string of sorry's.
you stand, it's very clear to you what needs to happen. if you have any chance of reconciliation. you need to cut contact.
'you're right. i didn't see it like that, but you're right. the second i walk away, i promise i'm done. no more texts, no more surprise visits, no more bothering you on campus. nothing. you come to me when you're ready. no matter the conversation.'
you follow your word and do just that while trying to ignore the worst form of anxiety that crosses over your chest. walking away, unsure if your boyfriend still loved you, was a feeling you wouldn't wish on anyone.
it spreads the longer you hear nothing from peter. was he adjusting to life outside you? should you be doing the same? you didn't realize how much you wrapped peter into your life until he wasn't around.
you had to find a classmate to do revisions with. you had to plan lunch with friends instead of peter. you had to scroll past articles and memes he'd enjoy. you had to stop yourself from texting him a hundred times a day.
the closest you got was a glimpse at his face when he was talking to a friend across campus, he was laughing. you felt relieved knowing he was happy, until you noticed it didn't seem like he missed you all that much.
after four days and all hope lost, you decided it was time to wave the white flag. it was over, if you grieve the relationship now it won't be so bad when he tells you officially. you'd be able to walk away without a panic attack.
while wallowing to yourself in your room, you berate yourself internally for ruining the one true good thing you had. spider-man was entirely too calm when he entered your room right as you felt a tear race down your cheek.
'why are we crying?'
you sit up, you've never been so happy to see the masked hero. until you piece together why he's there, you weren't pre-maturely crying after all.
sniffles around your words, 'cause we broke up.'
the mask is off in a second, 'who said that?' you shrug, the answer is in front of your face. 'isn't it obvious?' peter sits next to you, 'we're not broken up.'
you still don't feel comfortable, 'are we going to be?' peter rewords himself, 'i'm not here to break up with you, no.' 
‘then why are you here?’
peter exhales deeply, a tired excuse of a laugh. ‘i can be upset with my girlfriend and miss her at the same time.’ for just a second, you brighten. ‘you miss me?’
‘yeah. of course i do.’ you almost explode when peter pats your knee, ‘you’re my best friend.’ it’s enough to make you want to cry. you fall into him, an awkward hug, he doesn��t say anything.
‘you’re my best friend too. i missed you so much, i’m so, so, so sorry, peter.’ you melt when a gloved hand rubs your back, it’s not even his skin but you’ve missed his touch so much it’s enough to settle you.
‘it’s okay.’
the words you’ve been looking for, your heart soars. digging your fingertips into his shoulder blades, you hold him tight. ‘is it?’ you don’t want to force him into it.
‘it is.’
except when you remember your words it still doesn’t feel okay. you’re not sure if it ever will. you wonder if that’s what peter was waiting on. 'i don't know, peter. i don't want you to resent me.'
'hey,' you're held at arm's length, peter wants to make sure you're looking at him. 'i took time away so i wouldn't resent you. you really, really hurt my feelings, staying away helped me protect yours.'
you can't imagine the strife you placed on peter, you know actions speak louder than words, but it's a promise to yourself that you will never do anything like it again.
'i'm so sorry, peter. i feel terrible.'
a hint of a smile, 'i know you do. watching you squirm has been a little fun.' you drop your jaw, the nerve. 'oh, you're so mean for that!'
peter cleared his throat, you weren't out of the fog yet.
'but, seriously. that fucking killed me, i mean, i really thought i couldn't breathe. i was just... shocked. shocked more than mad or sad or... i'm not sure.'
you open your mouth, peter stops you, he knows what you're about to say. 'and i don't want you to keep apologizing. it happened, we worked through it, and it doesn't need to keep being mentioned.'
'okay.' it's quiet, you understand what he means, but you feel like you can't explain your sympathy enough.
'ben was one of the most important people in my life and i opened up to you about it. i know it was in the heat of the moment, but you can't use those things against me. it will make me feel like i can't share anything with you.'
'i'm-' peter cut you off with your name, you held your lips closed.
'you're not a bad girlfriend either. you tried. you reached out, you stopped by, you apologized, you stayed away. you did everything you could do to prove how sorry you felt. even if i ignored you, that didn't go unrecognized.'
peter takes a deep breath, 'so,' his hands cup your face, thumbs brush your cheek bones softly. 'i love you, i'm not breaking up with you and it's okay.' peter rubs his nose against yours, 'okay?'
peter isn't saying it's okay because it's fine you talked to him like that. peter's saying it's okay because he sees your imperfections and loves them. peter's saying it's okay because he's said some things he doesn't believe either.
peter's saying it's okay because we're all allowed to fall from grace from time to time.
you want to say sorry, instead you smile and push against his face with your own.
'okay.' 
'good. now give me a kiss, i've been dying for one.'
805 notes · View notes
knowyourplace-fool · 5 months
Note
Bully gojo and shy oc !! Who always torments you and humiliates you. Makes you do all his works and you do out of fear. You don't question him and feels smug . He tells how he hates you( but actually he likes her a lot but he doesn't confess because ypu keep rejecting every guy so he thinks you don't accept him either) and tells you that you are just a burden on this earth but then you get into an accident and don't come to scl for a week. Gojo doesn't know what happened to you and can't find out cuz you don't have frnds either. After a week you come to schl with a bandage to your head and a fracture sling on your arm. He gets worried and clings onto you and tou lash out for the first time telling him that he got what he wanted and he could be happy now. He gets angry and kidnaps you and fucks you🙃
-> omfg YES! gojo is such a bully
-> sorry for any mistakes!
⚠️: NON CON, Kidnapping, Mean!Gojo, physically, mental and emotional abuse, manhandling, bullying, biting, groping, size difference
-> THIS IS REALLY DARK AND FUCKED UP PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK !
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All you’ve ever done is mind your own business
Sure, you don’t have many friends but that doesn’t really bother you
You enjoy being independent. Your grades are high in the air, your part time job in your school is more than enough for you to live comfortably. (In this universe, inflation doesn’t exist)
You don’t really talk to anyone, not even family. Whole bunch of drama happened, and they were toxic so you ended up leaving them for university.
Everything seemed to be going as planned until a 6’4 menace walked into your life.
Gojo Satoru was your typical frat boy and the star of the university’s basketball team.
Some may even say the Golden Boy of your university. He was smart, athletic, had a good reputation among the professors and just with people in general. Not to mention, he was ridiculously handsome. Man literally had girls fighting over him.
You’ve seen him in the hallways but never actually interacted with him. He was in a few of your classes but luckily, you guys never were put together in a group.
Until today. Your prof is running a lab and gathered the smartest students he knows to do it for him. It’s kind of a two in one for him, the lab gets complete and you guys gain some experience.
Anyways, the group consists of you, Satoru and his friend Suguru and some other nerdy people
Now unlike Gojo, you already sorta knew Geto. He was really friendly and kind towards you so you were kind of excited to be working with him.
A few days into the lab and Gojo has a sudden fixation with you. Well he always had, but this lab is letting him work closely with you and it’s making his obsession worse.
You’re stupid if you think that Gojo Satoru hasn’t kept on eye out for you. Every time you walk by him in the halls, he gets a hard on just by catching a whiff of you. The cute skirts and the pastel closet you have drives him over the fucking edge.
It takes every cell in his body to resist the urge of grabbing ur wrist, pulling u into the janitors closet and fucking you absolutely dumb and stupid.
You look so cute and innocent, like a little bunny. And god, you are just an easy target to corrupt.
So, Gojo plans a party. A party on the following Saturday after your lab is complete because he knows that you’ll be free.
His plan is to get you to come, keep you company, get you a little hammered, then get a feel of your pussy. Simple plan.
It’s now up to Geto to get you to come to this party. And of course, for his best friend, he’s 100% on board with his plan.
All goes well in the lab and in your final days of completing the report, Geto asked the big question.
“Satoru and I are throwing a party tomorrow. If you’re free, we’d love for you to come. You can bring anyone you want.”
You blush. Party? Your first party? Your brain breaks out in celebration because as much as you liked to spend your weekend relaxing, you also have a severe case of fomo. (Fear of missing out)
Your eyes lit up, saying yes on the spot in excitement. The following day, you went back to your dorm and tore your closet apart, looking for a nice dress. You settled for a blue, body con, summer dress. (despite it not being a party dress but who gives af bc it’s summer)
The next night, you got all dolled up for the party. You made arrangements with Geto to pick you up. He made it on time, looking handsome in his all black fit with his hair in a bun.
You were excited… for nothing.
There was a party (a lit one), but you realized a little too late that your social skills were next to non existent. The whole time, you felt out of place. So you stood in the corner, drink in hand and watched others dance and interact with each other.
“You don’t look like you’re having fun.”
You turn your head only to be faced with a bright blue eyed man, the one and only Gojo Satoru.
“I guess partying is not my thing.”
“Oh come on, come with me.”
He grabbed your hand and headed towards the beer pong table
You and Gojo were a team and surprisingly you two worked perfectly together
The alcohol in your system made you flush, and you found yourself loosening up a bit and having a bit of fun.
Gojo’s plan seemingly was rolling out perfectly. You were a bit drunk, so he took you back to his room to “sober up” (but it was just an excuse to get u alone so he can fuck u but u don’t know that)
Now listen, Gojo got rizz alright. So imagine the look on his face when he went in to kiss you and you slapped him so hard, his face turned the other way.
“I’m not some whore you can use for tonight. I was genuinely having a good time with you, I don’t know why you had to make it sexual.”
You felt like crying. Is this what all guys think about?? Sex?
You get off the bed and head towards the door before you’re pulled back and thrown on the bed
“Satoru, stop! I want to go home.”
And just like how you did with him, he slapped you. Much, much harder.
He didn’t say anything, he just had this look in his eyes that could honestly kill. He took a hold of your wrist with one hand and let his other roam and touch your body.
He pulled your dress up, revealing the lacy, white, underwear you wore. You were a teensy bit wet, not because of him but maybe the alcohol? Or his best friend?
You don’t know, but Gojo thought the wet spot was because of him.
“Tch, saying you don’t wanna hook up but you’re fucking wet f’me.”
He pulled you closer to the head board, reaching out to his night stand and pulling out,,,, cuffs?
“Wait wait wait wait!” You say in a panic. You squirm to get your wrist free but once you feel the metal snake around your wrists and the click afterwards, you were doomed.
Your dress was ripped off by him. Your panty was somewhere on the ground and he easily took off your bra by doing the same thing he did with your dress. You laid nude under him, against your will.
As you can imagine, the night went terribly for you. You weren’t a virgin but it had been a while since you had sex (all the way back in high school) and really it was your first time with someone so experienced.
The next morning, you woke up with him cuddling you from behind while his lanky legs were intertwined with yours
You somehow managed to escape his grip and sneak out of the house before anyone could notice. You did have work, but decided to call in because of… well for obvious reasons.
On Monday, you dreaded to go to school. But with midterms coming around the corner, you couldn’t afford to miss a lecture. You dressed in baggy clothes and took a different route to class to avoid Satoru.
The day was going alright until you had to go to the library to pick out a few books to help you on an assignment.
While you were reaching on your tippy toes, someone behind you grabbed the book which made you quickly turn around. Your eyes meet his bright, blue eyes.
“You’re avoiding me now?”
The anger that overcame you in that moment was indescribable. You wanted to scream at him, hit him, threaten him or somehow bring him down, but you couldn’t.
“Did I fuck you mute? Answer me.”
You took a deep breath in and said, “leave me alone”
“Why? What, you think you’re too good for me? That I don’t have enough worth to fuck you? Is that what it is?”
He grabbed your cheeks with one hand and squished them together, pushing you back against the bookshelf in the process. He was holding you so hard, you couldn’t move.
“Listen to me, you slut. Don’t get our roles mixed here. You’re literally a piece of shit next to me. You hold no value in this world. If you died, no one would even think twice about it because no one gives a flying fuck about you. You think you’re soooo fucking special or something. You think you’re too good for everyone. Well you’re not. You’re just a broke whore, with no friends, no family, no hobby— nothing.”
He roughly let’s go of your face that you nearly fall to the floor. You tried your best but couldn’t help but cry at his words. Gojo swings off his backpack, grabs a note package and hands it to you.
“This assignment is due tomorrow at noon. I haven’t gotten the chance to start it because of basketball. So you’re going to do it for me cause you’re a worthless, bunny that has nothing else to do after school hours. And before you think about handing in something stupid, take a look at this.”
He pulls out his phone and in a matter of 10 seconds, you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach.
A video. Of you. Getting fucked by the Gojo Satoru. It’s evident that you’re crying but it’s easy to cover it up with an “excuse”. Your face held a horrified expression.
“P-please, delete that! Please, I’ll do it but please just- just delete the video please!”
“No, not until that assignment is handed in and I have to get 100% on it. If it isn’t handed in or I don’t receive 100%, this will be leaked to everyone in a matter of minutes. I’ll post this shit everywhere with your full name on it, got it?”
You felt like crying and throwing up at the same time. This felt worse than a nightmare. This felt worse than dying even. “Okay, I’ll try my best but I don’t know if I can get-”
“If you don’t get 100 on this assignment, I’m leaking it. I don’t give a shit. I already showed Suguru— sick bastard got off to it, and I’m sure many more will too if you don’t score 100.”
He picks up his backpack and leaves while you stood in distraught. The following night, after work, you immediately started on his assignment. You saw the assignment date and it was assigned 3 weeks ago. He wants you to do 3 weeks of work in 15 hours.
Somehow, you pulled through the night. Researching the best you can on the internet and trying to make it as best as you possibly could. You were able to send him the file at 11:30am so he could skim through it and hand it in.
You ended up leaving early for the day so you could go home and get some sleep. When you woke up the next morning, your nearly dead phone kept ringing over and over.
You pick it up and see hundreds of notifications on various social media’s and a few iMessages
Your thumb clicked on one of the iMessage notifications and there was Satoru’s name with the following message:
“I told you, only 100%”
Below the message was an image of his mark
A 98%
You swipe off of iMessage and open Instagram and boom
Hundreds of new follower requests, numerous dms and clicking of Gojo Satoru’s story, was the video of him blowing your back.
You checked Snapchat and there it was on his story too. You wanted to die. You wanted to dig a hole and bury yourself alive than live another day in this situation.
Later that day, you had received an email from the dean’s office regarding a “very sensitive and confidential” meeting that would be taking place tomorrow.
You had an idea of what it might be about but hope and prayed to god that it wasn’t what you were thinking.
But to your luck, this meeting was regarding your sex tape and how there is no longer a spot for you on the dean’s list or team.
Your whole world was crumbling apart. You spent your whole life to get to where you are today, only for him to ruin it in a matter of 12 hours.
You left the building slowly, still deeply thinking about what you could’ve done to prevent this. How stupid you are to go to that party and slap the Gojo Satoru.
“Why is this happening to me?”
All of a sudden, everything goes black.
You wake up in a hospital. Your head felt heavy and your arms was twitching. You look around and see… no one. The nurse catches a glimpse of your eyes and quickly walks in to check on you.
She explains that you were in an accident and that they tried to get in contact with an emergency contact but you hadn’t stated anyone. You stayed at the hospital overnight so they can monitor your brain activity and fortunately they were able to discharge you the next morning.
You took the rest of the week off from school and Gojo Satoru was losing his mind. He had spammed called you from various numbers but you weren’t answering your phone at all. He went from his usual mean insults to angry insults to pleading for a response back.
He doesn’t see you until Monday, with a bandage around your head and your arm in a cast which is also in a sling. He nearly runs to you, wanting nothing but to embrace you.
And he does. Holds onto you tightly, inhaling your shampoo until you knee his in the balls.
He immediately drops down and you completely lose your cool. “Don’t fucking touch me! I hate you! You ruined my life! You’re not allowed to touch me after you forced me to have sex with you and shared the video with the entire campus! You got what you wanted Satoru! You stole everything from me! Broke my entire world, burned my hard work down! Made me feel worthless! And now you want to act all concerned?! I hope you rot in hell!”
You ended up going home for the day, otherwise another headache would’ve set in. You took a quick lap before getting up and getting ready for work because those hospital bills weren’t going to pay themselves.
You had the closing shift and although working with one hand was quite the challenge, you desperately needed the money.
After closing up, the walk to your apartment is about 10 minutes away. Everything was going fine until a car quickly pulled up next to you, two men sprung out and shoved you into the car before you even had the chance to react.
One of them had his hand over your mouth while the other held your legs together.
You were blindfolded and tied in the car and after a while the car came to a stop and you were carried out.
You were thrown on the floor and when the blindfold was removed, you were met with his eyes again.
You immediately started crying. You were afraid and quite frankly exhausted of everything that’s happened over the last week.
“Please. I’m sorry. Just let me go. I’ll never ever bother you again. I’m sorry.”
You plead and beg but you hear his belt unbuckling. “Please! Please, I beg you Satoru! I’m sorry! I can’t- I can’t do it again please!”
You were left unheard. He threw you on the bed and tied your limbs to the bed. One of your arms was already in extreme pain and the other arm was starting to hurt too because of how tightly he tied you.
Every ounce of hope drained from your body when you felt his cock push into you. He pushed your head into the mattress and fucked you hard, like there was no tomorrow. Your tears soaked the mattress. Sweat, tears and snot covering your puffing face.
Satoru went on for hours. Abs glistening in sweat, his arm veins popping out because of how hard he was holding you. Not to mention his cock was coated with loads of cum.
You were passed out by the time he finished with you. Your body shaking on its on, cum dripping out your cunt and marks/bruises left all over your soft skin.
Hopefully his bunny learned her lesson.
1K notes · View notes
angelltheninth · 8 months
Note
hiii !can i request sum mahito smut hcs ? the new ep made me wanna give him head loll :/
Just general headcanons? Sure, been a while since I didn't write anything too specific.
Pairing: Mahito x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, smut, rough sex, possessive sex, choking, cum marking, scratching, making out, ruined orgasm, control, begging, power dynamics, mean dom!Mahito
A/N: A real good friend of mine loves Mahito so I hope I do him justice.
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Aftercare is... pretty much non-existent with Mahito, he knows what it is but he never seems to bother with it in the slightest
Having sex with him is a gamble if you're gonna be coming or not, he will for sure, he always does but your orgasm depends on his mood
Wants you to wear short, revealing skirts that show your legs so he can grab your thighs and ass whenever he wants, and so his sharp bites are visible
You have to buy new underwear all the time because he rips them all of you in his horny haste to get you naked
Your body is his canvas to paint with his cum and you don't get a say in that, he will make sure every demon within miles can smell that you belong to him alone, that he is the one who gets to fuck your cunt every night, no any time of day he wants
Mahito's libito is very, very high and somehow gets higher after he killed someone
Having sex with you while he's still covered in blood is no issue for him
Loves to leave deep scratches, gashes on your stomach when he fucks you from behind, these are only you for you to see, because the moment someone else mentions them he'll know that you've been showing your body to someone else, and of course he can't have that
Those marks are further proof that his is your one and only
Mahito doesn't fuck anyone else while he has you either, he brags about them though, or tells you how easy you are to replace if you don't know your place, don't do as you're told
He has ways of punishing you when you mess up too, he can fuck you within an inch of coming, fill you with enough cum to get you pregnant and then press on your clit while telling you not to come
Can do so once, leaving you waiting for him to come back or he can do it many times in one sex session and never let you come, have you begging, torn between disobeying him, touching yourself and listening to him
When he's bored of a meeting he'll leave without saying a word, march into your room and start to make out with you
If anyone interrupts he'll flip them off while making a show of ripping off your panties and hand the torn piece of clothing on the door handle, that's something that's become pretty much a warning sign not to be disturbed
No one would ever call you a slut to your face except for Mahito despite everyone knowing you fuck on a nightly basis and enjoy every degrading thing he does to you
He loves to have your legs around him while you kiss, it makes him feel like he's the one with no choice but to get out of this by fucking you, it makes him feel like you're challenging him to fuck you hard enough for your legs to turn to jello
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matryosika · 4 months
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Mark; Power Dynamic and Other Analysis
Wordcount: 1,065 words Includes: Silly little headcanons Genre: Smut, 18+ Author’s note: This is purely based on my imagination and the vibes I get from him. You may or may not agree with me, and that’s completely okay —this is only me free associating for a thousand words straight. Please enjoy whatever this is, and don't hesitate to share your thoughts with me! Credits: MDNI banner by @/cafekitsune !
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First things first, I sense that Mark loves to be in control. 
With that being said, I honestly don't picture him as a hard dominant. He might not even care about roles, anyway, but he is naturally leaning towards the dominant side. 
He is really playful with the role, though. Mark is such a tease, and really creates an environment in which you can feel comfortable. He takes it upon himself to reassure you in every step of the fucking way —if he feels like you’re shying away from him, he would do anything just to bring you back to him.
For instance, I feel like one of his priorities in bed is to make sure you feel comfortable exposing yourself to him. I can really see him being into body worshiping and might even kneel in front of you and kiss your body from head to toe, whispering sweet nothings while asking all the right questions: "do you like it when I kiss you like this?, "does it feel good?", "do you want me touch you here?", and so on.
Despite the natural dominance I see in him, I do feel like he can get needier and more desperate than you, and he is not really ashamed of expressing it. This man is whiny, might even beg you to let him please you. And it's good that he is very talkative, because I just know his voice gets deeper and raspier in sexual contexts. At the same time, he is not really that loud; it's all whispers and murmurs, half of his words are muffled because he just has to have his lips attached to your skin and flesh. 
But when I say he is talkative, I mean it. The type to curse under his breath, and even start rambling about how much he loves you and how good you're making him feel. At one point he stops making any sense, because he is no longer thinking with his head but his dick. 
Mark might seem shy and collected at first, but I feel like the most he progresses into a sexual encounter, the less timid and more primal he becomes. 
But even then, I don't picture him as someone who might enjoy degrading or humiliating you, and certain practices like impact play might be a big no for him. I feel like he could try if you asked him to, but I don't think he would enjoy it just for the sake of slapping or spanking you. If he does enjoy it, it's probably out of ego —the fact that you're trusting him enough to ask him such things, and that you're enjoying them.
But, willingly, I don't think Mark would ever inflict pain on you like that.
Overstimulation and denial, however, are a whole other topic for him. He doesn't mind hurting you a little if he knows you can take it, and that it can become pleasure in exchange for a little pain —the way he proves your loyalty is through how good you're at following his orders and how willing you're to leave your pleasure aside, or endure a little pain, just because he asked you to. 
Mark is a hopeless romantic, and that translates into sex as a somewhat possessive partner. He is only yours, as long as you prove to him that you're only his. He is going to love you passionately if only you can do the same for him; he never hesitates when it comes to you, and he expects you to be the same when it comes to him. 
Because of this passion and intensity, I think he is very much the jealous type. Get jealous easily, and might act a little bit impulsive on it. Also, he isn't afraid of bringing said topics with you —if something bothers him, he will tell you without beating around the bush. It may conflict him, and he might get shy when talking to you about whatever it was that upsetted him, but he never keeps such things for himself.
That's kind of relevant because I think the possessive, jealous part of him really makes an appearance in bed —he wants to hear you say how you belong to him, and him only; how your body it's only his to touch and kiss, how you don't want anyone else but him.
Mark wants everything there is of you —your mind, heart and body. 
And that's why sex is always so intense; not necessarily rough, but emotionally I feel like he brings a shit ton of vulnerability and he needs you to do the same. Sex with him it's always so fucking intimate, and it can get really filthy because trust is one of the most important things for him —he doesn't care about the mess, as long as it is your mess (with this I mean like certain fluids or things one might find disgusting, but to him they really aren’t). 
He might be an experimentalist; he is willing to try everything at least once before deciding if he is into it or not. He’s also pretty good at communicating and putting his thoughts and emotions into words, so that gives me the impression that he is really in touch with himself and his preferences. 
So, going back to the power dynamic bit, I don't see Mark willingly and fully submitting to you. Although I said he might not even care about those sorts of roles, I feel like he is the most comfortable with being in charge of your pleasure and his. For some it might be a burden, but not for him —he leans towards dominance naturally, not to assert it but because he likes it.
Mark is always gentle, but in the midst of things I really believe he can manhandle you unintentionally. He might squeeze your hands a bit too harshly, or grip your hips a bit too rough; not to hurt you, but because he loses his mind in between. He gets so drunk on you and your body, that he just forgets the whole world surrounding him but you.
To wrap things up, I must say he is a fucking great kisser. I do see him as someone who kisses sloppily, but in a "I definitely know what I'm doing" kind of way. He bites, and uses tongue, and just makes sure to kiss you deeply until your mouth is full of him. Mark either places his hands on each side of your face or takes you by your waist to press his body against yours.
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yuri-is-online · 2 months
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Hey, Yuri, do you think Yuu would ever run the risk of being put in danger by having a romantic relationship with any of the more high-profile members of the cast? I mean, we’ve got royalty, nobility, celebrities, and the very wealthy attending this school. I’ve just been rotating my brain about how these relationships would work out and Yuu is a pretty vulnerable target without NRC’s security. - 🦐
Hmmmmmm. I have a bunch of thoughts about this actually... I tried ranking them from least to most dangerous if that makes sense? But don't read too deeply into the bullet point placements they were mostly just a stream of consciousness thing.
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Not that Risky (surprisingly)
Leona- we don't really have details about his brother's marriage, but I don't think his family has been shown to be overly keen on forming alliances with outside countries, the Savannah seems more concerned with itself. I don't think his family would be too fussed with his partner being a magicless person from outerspace, if anything this might be seen as a plus to the councilors that are always mocking Leona behind his back as his partner's lack of royal blood makes him even less fit for the throne. Not to mention Leona himself is more than enough to protect Yuu, he's the only royal at the school without a proper retainer (which you could argue is because no one at home likes him) but I doubt his family would let him do that if he was genuinely in danger.
Rook- he's Rook. His family does sound rather sweet from the very very very little we know about him (he also seems like he was kind of sheltered as a kid, something I should chew on sometime) so I doubt they would allow anything too bad to happen to Yuu.
Vil- his main issue is his contract, the Japanese Idol industry is cut throat and often sees things like bans on relationships as part of the contract. Vil doesn't want to risk his career or reputation, he mentions that he himself is a brand and I can't see him wanting to put that pressure on Yuu if they're not up for it. But... there are also celebrities who have really private personal lives and I sort of get the sense Vil is like that? And I don't think he would be too bothered if Yuu didn't want to be super public, it would certainly make it easier to keep you safe.
Idia- S.T.Y.X. might be a gloomy place but no one knows where it is
Medium Danger (danger is real but can be managed)
Jade and Floyd- we don't actually know what their family does, just that it's probably sketchy and that Mama Leech calls them every day, taught them self defense, and just generally seems to worry about them a lot. The danger is very real under the sea, but I also sort of get the sense that messing with the Leech family is skipping the fuck around and going straight to find out.
Azul- his business is going to make him enemies sooner or later, but at least during school Yuu should be more or less safe. Azul's able to keep on top of the students who mean Yuu harm, and Yuu is able to politely ignore their boyfriend's business (or maybe they have a knack for helping?) When you get older I can see Azul's need for a security team expanding, but he'll have money to get the best.
Riddle- ok so. I don't think his mom would try to kill you. But god she would be such a toxic person to manage. I'm actually working on a (very old) request atm that involves discussing what Riddle's mom might do if she finds Riddle with a partner instead of his studies (which I assume she's paying for) especially during his internship. She'd go full scorched earth and get very confused when Yuu doesn't back off like Trey did.
Huston We Have a Problem
Kalim- the amount of assassination attempts my poor boy has already canonically endured... I imagine there are probably going to be more in his future. I can see Yuu needing their own retainer (which could be a fun concept for an oc) to protect them and test their food. When Grim becomes a great mage I'm sure he could help with that actually, wouldn't that be cute?!
MALLEUS- acceptance of humans is virtually non existence in Briar Valley AND his mother hated humans so much she "blessed" her child to only be loved by fae. We don't actually know how the senate works but I imagine they would lose their ever loving shit if Malleus brought home a human as a friend and now he wants to make them his spouse? No. They say no. Time to show them what an absolute monarchy means I guess.
Assuming Yuu isn't in a relationship with Malleus I could see their friendship actually sort of being a boon to them, especially if Yuu was with Kalim or Azul. Pissing of the merchants is one thing, but the King of the Abyss? No thank you, they'll just take their losses and go.
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kentoberry · 2 years
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the chain — toji fushiguro.
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about · toji doesn't tame brats, he breaks them.
content · [ 18 + content ; minors dni] · female reader · brat taming · toys · heavy d3gradation & name calling · age gap (toji in his 40s, reader in their 20s) · daddy kink · f1ngering · mention of f1sting · p-ssy slapping · dumbification · dacryphilia.
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"fuckin' brat," toji spat, huffing as he pushed you back onto his unmade sheets. "yer always fucking testin' my patience, doll..."
he stalked around to his bedside table, pulling something out of the drawer before returning to you. he ran a large hand up your thigh, watching you shiver under his piercing gaze. it made you forget what you'd done to misbehave, fear and excitement alike swallowing you whole.
"none of that squirmin', ya hear me?" toji threatened. when you didn't reply, he roughly gripped your chin and forced you to look at him. "i'm not fuckin' around, sweetheart. gonna be a good girl f'me and take it, ain't ya? fucking answer me."
the seriousness lacing his tone made you feel faint, and you struggled to utter a little whimper of "yes, daddy!" before toji had his way with you. he lifted one of your legs to meet his waist, giving him better access to your dripping cunt. he slapped it a couple of times for good measure, feeling you up before stuffing two of his fingers into you. the man didn't bother giving you a chance to adjust, instead fucking you ruthlessly and swearing about how filthy you were.
you couldn't help but squeal as toji worked on stretching your hole open, preparing you for what you assumed would be his cock. each movement from him was rough, enough to make you tear up a little, but you had no plans on uttering your safe word any time soon.
before you could even comprehend it, toji was three... no, four... fingers deep inside of you. you felt dizzy, babbling that you were close to cumming.
"don't you fuckin' dare, brat. i'm far from done with ya." with an irked sigh, toji removed his fingers from you. within a flash, he picked up the item that he'd retrieved from his drawer: his fleshlight. sure, he hadn't needed to use it in a while as having a slutty girlfriend such as yourself means he gets an easy lay, but he kept it nonetheless.
after a drizzle of lube along the handle of the toy, toji bit the bullet and began working it into your warm pussy. despite the fact that he was slow and gentle with his movements, doing his best not to hurt you, his words were a stark contrast.
"fuckin' whore, so eager to take anything in yer loose cunt, eh?"
"maybe later i'll see if i can fit my fist in ya, surely that'd ruin this pussy f'r anyone else you ever wanna fuck,"
"look at ya squirm, brat. ya like havin' an old man break yer nasty cunt, yeah?"
each syllable sent sparks flying to your core; toji knew exactly what you liked best and was using it against you. before you could even comprehend it, toji's fleshlight was stuffed in your pussy, occassionally shifting as your walls subconsciously clamped down around it. he wore a shit eating grin as he slapped the fat tip of his cock against you clit, causing you to jolt a little. it must've been your on switch, toji thought, because you started whining and begging for him to fuck you properly immediately afterwards.
"shh, sweetheart," he drawled, cupping your cheek as he feigned benevolence. "ya know i don't tolerate that bratty ass of yours. i better break it before ya go pickin' up bad habits. surely yer smart enough ta understand." he tapped your cheek then moved his hands back to your thighs. after swiftly aligning his cock with his toy, he started to fuck it.
at first, each thrust was tender. he watched your every expression to ensure that he had neither gone too far or was causing you extreme discomfort, and once he was satisfied, he sped up.
a string of curses fell from toji's lips as he found his pace, smirking at the tears staining your cheeks as you became reduced to a point beyond cohesion — it was as though the only phrases contained in your pretty little mind were "daddy" and "more". he couldn't help himself from running a thumb over your wet cheek and proceeding to lick the salty tears off of his digit. he was being downright nasty with you, fucking his toy hard enough that he was already nearing his release. the sound of his heavy balls slapping against your ass complimented your cries so perfectly.
"where d'ya want my cum, sweets?" he asked, hoping you were still of sound enough mind to answer.
it took you a moment and your voice was meek, but you managed to croak out a small "in me, daddy."
the glint in his eyes would have told you he had other plans, but your vision was instead clouded by tears.
toji slowly pried his fleshlight out of your dripping pussy, though instead of replacing it with his cock, he left you high and dry. the man picked up the toy and pumped his cock a few more times before pulling out, tapping your clit once again, and spilling his load all over your used cunt. it only resulted in more sobs and mewls from you, with toji instead leaning closer to you and hissing in your ear:
"only good toys get daddy's cum."
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merakiui · 3 months
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VALENTINES DAYYY WHO’S USING THERE CUM AS FILLING FOR CHOCOLATES AND WHO’S USING APHRODISIAC
Riddle - he spent all week learning how to make aphrodisiac chocolates, but unfortunately he made them a little too strong. You're in for a very fun, very long night. :)
Trey - Both. Why pick just one when both are equally wonderful?
Cater - He doesn't need either when he can use Split Card!! <3
Ace - Aphrodisiac. Arguably one of the few potions Ace masters fairly quickly and it's for nefarious purposes. T_T
Deuce - Flowers and chocolates (cum-free). That's for later in the evening after he's taken you out on the best date of your life!
Leona - Neither. You'll get it straight from the source.
Jack - He gives you actual chocolates. If you want filling (or to be filled), he's more than happy to oblige.
Ruggie - It's purely coincidence you happen to feel hot and bothered after eating the chocolate Ruggie gave you, just as it's purely coincidence you touch yourself according to his every movement.
Azul - He overdoes it every year for Valentine's and this is no different. You're getting an entire spread of sweets, and after you've had your fill he'll spread your legs and indulge in his treat.
Jade - Aphrodisiac. <3 he has all the time in the world to make sure you remember the taste of him on your tongue.
Floyd - Neither. You'll get it straight from the source.
Kalim - Definitely aphrodisiac chocolates. He can't stop feeding them to you. Kalim knows exactly what he's doing when he insists you have just one more. He'll take care of you!!
Jamil - I like to think he'd use both, but then for more dubious purposes perhaps he doesn't need either and resorts to hypnosis...
Vil - Aphrodisiac!!!!!!! Vil is a master of mixing and making poisons. You can be sure he'll have whipped up the most potent aphrodisiac solely for some Valentine's Day fun.
Rook - Both. This is Rook Hunt. He's weird. T_T also, every day is Valentine's Day if you're Rook Hunt.
Epel - Neither. You'll get it straight from the source.
Idia - Both. He definitely gifts you a skimpy cosplay as well. Please grant his wish and wear it just this once. orz
Malleus - Neither. He will get you lots of gifts: flowers or cute plushies. Anything that reminds him of you, really. Plus, he has two dicks. You will be very well-filled by the end of the night, more so than any chocolate or candy ever could be.
Lilia - THAT'S chocolate?????? T_T Lilia cooked...something. You think you'll settle for kisses from him instead. ;;;;; and a bruising round of sex. That's good, too.
Silver - So romantic!!!!! While there isn't any dubious ingredients added to your chocolates, Silver goes out of his way to make sure you feel appreciated and loved. The birds sing for you, draping a flower crown over your head, and guide you to where he's waiting in hopes of asking you on a date.
Sebek - He would never give you a gift! As if! >:( the gift of viewing waka-sama should be enough for you and him! Be grateful to be in his lord's presence!!!!! (Sebek won't admit it, but he wants you to give him head,,, >_<)
Rollo - Very traditional for Valentine's Day. Flower bouquet, a lovely date, holding hands, chaste kisses to your cheek or knuckles....... and then the most sheet-gripping sex you've ever had that night.
Neige - He suffocates you in love omg,,, but if you start feeling a little too hot halfway through your date, don't worry!!! He'll take good care of you. <3
Che'nya - Rather than that, he can just go invisible and toy with you until you're begging him to properly fuck you.
Fellow - He's not extravagant or expensive with it, but he does mean well with his gifts (mostly). Some may come with strings attached, so be forewarned. He's sneaky! However, he's certain he can help you out of that. There are plenty of ways to mitigate an aphrodisiac...
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