#the sun.... cries this is so much pain but i feel a lot better now wtf

[runningmunson]

Monster in The Stories

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Female!Reader Word Count: 1.1k Summary: Aemond's young children see his eye for the first time scaring them. He becomes insecure about being a monster to them but you reassure him that wont ever be true. Warnings: Swearing, insecurities, angst to fluff

Masterlist

Aemond’s skin bothered him greatly today. His patch rubbed at the scar in all the wrong ways causing him a lot of pain. He chose to ignore his duties for the day and stay inside the safety of his own chambers. It was the only place he truly felt comfortable enough to leave his face bare, hoping the fresh air would help soothe the irritation where his eye had once been. This left him time to think about the little family he had created.

You and Aemond had two beautiful children, the spitting image of their father in every way. Rhaegar was your firstborn son, now the age of three. Then there was Vaera, your eight-month-old daughter. They were his pride and joy. Aemond tried hard not to be absent like his father, instead opting to be a constant presence as much as he could for what the court demanded of him.

Little Rhaegar’s legs tried to keep up with your own as you carried Vaera to your room, unaware that Aemond was already there. When you opened the door, you saw your silver-haired husband sitting at his desk reading. Rhaegar ran off to play, so you sat Vaera on the floor to allow her to crawl and joined your son.

She made her way over to her father, using his leg to stand up. He reached down to pick her up into his arms and smiled at her, “hello, my sweet girl.”

He forgot that he was not wearing the eye patch that he never took off around his children. This was a mistake seeing as the second Vaera looked at her father's face, she let out a piercing scream, not recognizing him, and began to wail.

Rhaegar ran over to see why his sister was crying, and you followed behind. Another mistake because Rhaegar began to cry as well. “Mama, papa hurt!”

You looked over to your husband and gasped, “Aemond, you don’t have your patch on!”

His face dropped. Guilt set in as he looked between the two when he realized he was the cause of their tears. He tried to comfort Vaera, but it only made the screaming worse. The baby was quickly shoved into your arms as he stormed out of the room, roughly shoving the leather over his head.

“Wait! Aemond, I didn’t mean-,” you cried out, but you were met with the door slamming, leaving you to calm your children.

You knew better than to follow him. Aemond often needed time alone to process things, so you tried not to hover and give him space. If he wanted to talk about it you let him come to you.

---

Aemond wasn’t at dinner that evening. Your mother-in-law questioned his absence, but you made an excuse that he wasn’t feeling well. The sun had long set before you made your way back to your shared chambers. The nannies had already taken the children off to bed for the night.

You were surprised to find him in the room, sitting in a chair in front of the fireplace, nursing a cup of wine. His gaze was fixated on the soft orange glow the flames gave off and so deep in thought that he did not hear you come in.

The click of the door shutting made him turn to look at you. His lips were drawn in a steady line, no emotions shown, which made it difficult for you to read him at that moment. You stood in place near the door as you held your breath, not wanting to approach him for fear of possibly angering or upsetting him. A sigh of relief was heard from your mouth when he held his hand out wanting you to join him.

You walked over and he pulled you onto his lap, securing an arm around your waist while the other rested on the arm of the chair. You looked at him, but he refused to meet your gaze, “Are you alright?”

“I am as well as one can be for someone whose children now fear them,” he chuckled bitterly.

“Aemond… they don't fear you,” you sighed, but knew you were not convincing.

He ignored your comment, “I always knew I would receive looks and judgment from the fucks of the court, but I got used to it, growing thick skin. I guess I suppose I never imagined I would go through it again with my own children, knowing that I look like the monster they will hear about in stories. You were there; you saw how terrified they were of me.”

“They’re young, Aemond. They don’t yet understand, and they certainly don’t mean you any harm. They are not used to seeing you uncovered because you have never shown them anything else,” you tried to reason with him, but once your husband thinks something it's hard to undo.

His jaw clenched, “I know, but it does not make it any easier. I never showed them because I did not wish for the reaction I received today.”

“You aren't a monster. And how could our children not learn to love it when I will make sure they will grow up hearing the stories of how their brave father lost his eye to gain the world's largest dragon?” You smiled at him softly. You reached your hand up to his patch, attempting to take it off, but he grabbed your wrist to stop you.

“Will you not grant your loving wife’s wish to see her husband’s face? All of it? I don’t get to see the real you enough,” you raised your eyebrows. He sighed but reluctantly let go.

“You’re infuriating, you know that, right?” He replied. He reached behind his head and pulled it off.

“Ah! There he is, the most handsome man in all the seven kingdoms. Have I ever told you that your scar is quite… alluring?” You beamed with sincerity in your voice.

Aemond rolled his eye and shook his head. He tried to look annoyed, but that didn’t stop the feeling of butterflies in his stomach and the small smile that played on his lips. Despite all these years of knowing each other, you never failed to make him feel loved, valued, and appreciated.

“What is that? Is-is that a smile I see coming from the big scary Aemond? Oh my, whatever will we do?” You giggled.

He stood up, almost making you fall from his lap. You felt arms around your legs. You were suddenly lifted off the ground and thrown over his shoulder letting out a squeal. He walked over to the bed and tossed you, your body landing on the plush bed.

“I don’t enjoy being made fun of,” he smirked, playing along.

“Is that so? And what are you going to do about it?” You smirked.

“Do not worry, my dear. I have all night to punish you.”

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen imagine #aemond x reader #hotd imagine #hotd #house of the dragon x reader #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen fluff #aemond targaryen angst

[houpss]

SKZ's reaction to your death ver. maknae line

hyung line (please pay attention to this work, I tried 😿)

It pains me to write this work, my heart breaks and I begin to believe in this nonsense... BUT REMEMBER THAT ONLY PERSONALITIES ARE TAKEN FROM THE REAL SKZ, EVERYTHING REST IS FICTION!

Mentions of explosions, drugs, addictions, fatal diseases, a lot of tears, fatal diseases . ANGST.

Han Jisung

He begged you not to go, because he had a nightmare where you died.

You just laughed it off and kissed Jisung on the cheek, what could have happened?

He literally knew this would happen.

He calls Changbin: “The company building Y/N was in was blown up.”

He knew.

He felt nothing, complete emptiness.

His hands were shaking madly, he wanted to disappear.

Your body was not found, perhaps it was torn to pieces.

An empty coffin was buried, it's so scary.

The feeling of your morning kiss is still on his cheek. You promised him to come in the evening and watch new episodes of anime.

But you'll never come back again.

He dreams about you, but he wants more.

Yes, he will start taking drugs to prolong the effect of your presence.

Members will notice this only over time.

Minho and Hyunjin dragged Jisung to psychotherapist and addiction specialists while the other members cleared out Jisung's room.

You are no longer in his room, there is nothing connected with you there anymore.

“Jisung, Y/N wouldn’t like it that you became a drug addict.”

"There is no more Y/N, which means I don’t care about myself."

His eyes are full of pain, he hasn’t cried since your death, the tears just won’t come.

"It's like I died with her"

"Bro, you need to move on with your life for her sake, she would want that."

"What's the point if it doesn't exist?"

"You're destroying yourself"

Jisung doesn't care.

He walks a lot, he doesn't eat and he writes a lot, he wrote so many lyrics.

Felix spoon feeding Jisung is so wrong.

He needs to learn to take care of himself.

No one else will be as caring as you.

Han Jisung will never cry, because he sees you regularly, he practically doesn’t miss you anymore.

After a while he will return to drugs again, it just hurts him. he misses.

And again he will go to a narcologist and psychotherapist.

And again, again, again. It's a vicious circle.

He doesn’t want you to leave, stay with him some more. He can't handle it.

Lee Felix

"You are very beautiful today, Y/n"

"Lixie, I feel worse every day... don't say that."

"But you are so beautiful..we will get out together"

He lied, you won't get out. He lied to you and himself.

He forbade the doctors to tell you about your condition. Everything was handed over to him personally.

He knew you didn't have much time left.

On your last day, he baked you your favorite cookies, as if he felt that you would leave him.

He wasn't ready.

Late in the evening, he fed you cookies and read your favorite book, you squeezed his hand tightly.

"Felix, I love you very much...you are my happiness, freckle"

Your last words. The sun has gone out, the world is falling apart.

Changbin and Minho led him out of the room; other participants were already waiting in the corridor.

It was so painful and empty, as if happiness had disappeared. You disappeared.

He returned to the dorm, his request to return to your apartment was refused.

You refused to be hospitalized until the very end, but Felix still managed to drag you to the hospital. You even felt better.

He was lying on his back in a cold bed, it was cold without you.

This will be his first birthday without you.

He doesn't want to celebrate it.

Your stuffed animal was lying on his bed, he held it tightly in his hands.

It hurt, he was all alone now.

This will go on for several weeks. Felix doesn't remember anything, like stills from a movie.

Members constantly come to see him.

He pretends to live, and is even happy that it’s his birthday. His first birthday without your presence.

He doesn't want it that way.

"Felix, let's go, you need to take a walk."

Chan lifted Felix out of bed, washed him, changed him and fed him. Felix is so grateful to Chan.

Chan drove Felix to your apartment, he said he would pick Felix up later.

Everywhere there was the smell of you and your love, on the table there was food for Felix and the usual note. The bed is rumpled.

He fell to his knees, tears streaming down his cheeks. it absolutely hurt, he felt nothing but pain.

For some reason, for the first time he felt so painful and sad. In general, Felix is very vulnerable, but...

He never imagined how he would cry over the loss of someone.

He couldn't even contact your family.

You had no family or friends; you were abandoned as a child. Felix and SKZ were the only people close to you.

You never really wanted to tell Felix about your family, it was too painful to remember.

He so wanted to hug you, stroke your pretty cheeks and tell you that everything is good in this world. you have nothing to fear.

You loved it when he hugged you and smiled brightly.

He always lied.

He always lied and said that your condition was improving.

Did he regret that he lied? No

He was delaying the moment of death for you.

He put on your huge sweater, your bright smell is on it. He loves this smell so much.

He loves you so much.

Loving people don't leave. stupid lie.

Why does it hurt so much? Why does it hurt so much to love someone?

Then Chan took him, Felix might feel better for a few days.

Felix will even appear at a fashion event.

But...

You will have to bury two coffins, he will die after you.

Felix realized that it was so stupid... it was stupid to live without you.

You will find him in the afterlife, right?

" Lee Felix 15.09.2000–08.10.202*"—"Lee Y/N 01.01.2000–08.09.202*"

Kim Seungmin

You were strangled in an alley while returning home.

Kim didn't have time to meet you.

He blamed himself and only himself.

Your body was found only in the morning.

Pale suits you, dear.

Seungmin looked at you as usual, like you were the eighth wonder of the world...why did you go to that alley?

No, Seungmin never cries.

He did not ask for the support of his members or the support of his family, he will cope on his own, as always.

He will become closed and taciturn. The company won't even release a statement about his rest.

He will throw himself into his work, he will work day and night.

The members are too worried about his condition.

Seungmin doesn't feel anything anymore, he doesn't feel joy, sadness, or pain.

As if the body exists separately from him. Inside he is nobody.

He returns to your shared apartment only a few weeks later, his lips frozen: “Y/N, I’m home.”

But there was no one at home except him.

The apartment is dark and cold, it was so empty without you.

On the dresser he will find an envelope with a letter, you left him one every time when he returned late.

It said: “I love you very much, Kim Seungmin. Come to me in my dreams.”

This was not as usual, you had never written to him like this.

Everything that had accumulated over several weeks came out.

Seungmin hates crying, he never cries.

Tears flow limply down his face as he presses the paper to his chest.

You won't come back anymore, it's time to get used to it.

He will find your album with photos, he is so in love with you.

Then he will fall asleep and see you in his dreams for the first time. Thank you for coming.

then you told him to move on... but how to live without you?

For the first time, he felt unbearable pain and despair.

He will write songs about you, breathing you and living in the past.

Why does Kim Seungmin continue to live?

Yang Jeongin

Baby, he killed you himself.

How did it happen?

"I could be a better boyfriend than him"

He was always very jealous of you, but to the point of killing you?

This is a terrible case.

Jeongin has no regrets, you're mine or nobody's

No one will know about this, it is disguised as an accident. What a pity.

Perhaps he will be bored.

He's so bored without you

A few times he will come to your grave, it's quite rude.

He keeps all your things with him, he will never be missed, you are nearby.

tell me why did you kill her?

“Jeongin, why don’t you miss her?”

"She is forever in my heart"

It's like he's lying.

"I killed her simply because I was so jealous." Pure confession

He might even cry to show that he misses you.

You don't want to look for it in the next life, a very cruel death at the hands of a loved one.

And Jeongin won’t look for anyone else, because he loves YOU.

Sometimes his conscience torments him, but he did it for the good.

#stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids imagines #stray kids headcanons #stray kids reactions #stray kids x y/n #stray kids x you #skz x y/n #skz x you #skz x reader #skz jisung #skz felix #skz hyunjin #skz changbin #skz bang chan #skz lee know #skz seungmin #skz jeongin #felix x y/n #jeongin x reader #jisung x reader #seungmin x you #skz headcanons #skz reactions #stray kids angst #skz angst #angst

[leviismybby]

Sun sets early

Levi Ackerman x gn!reader

Angst so much angst but there is a little fulff...

!Heavy spoilers for season 4!

Levi hated sunsets, he hated them. All they bring were bad memories no matter how stunning the colors in the sky were, Levi hated sunsets.

It had little to do with his past and a lot to do with his regrets. His experience with them was never something he likes to get reminded of.

He looks around the plane and sees you with teary eyes, the loss of Hange has left both of you devastated. But the way you look completely broken and tired makes his soul shatter.

You're both tired of fighting, tired of constantly losing the people you love. Levi can handle that weight better than you or so he thinks as he grips the hand he saluted Hange with earlier.

The world has been cruel to your love, both of you were always so close to each other but also so far apart, divided by your duties as soldiers for humanity.

You look towards Levi and your eyes lock, this could be the last time you're seeing him. All of your world before you, a reason why you kept going.

Earlier you begged him not to fight, to stay in that ship however you knew that it was going to happen. He was going to fight to free humanity till the end, that's your Levi. The Levi that you fell in love with.

The two of you don't need to say any words, your eyes are speaking. Those grey orbs have very little light left in them and you would do anything right now for all of his pain to be your own.

You hated seeing him like this, with a weight of the world on his shoulders, hope long gone, all there is left is to fight.

And now you start to wonder if you do manage to save the world, how would it look? Would you finally be free?

Levi starts to replay all of his favorite moments of you in his head, all of those midnight talks the two of you shared, that dumb little smile when he would make one of his poop jokes, those eyes that hold the world in them when you explain something you're passionate about.

That kiss the two of you shared before Shiganshina because you two didn't know if either of you were coming back. It was brief and sure it wasn't the best kiss but it meant so so much to both of you.

It assured you two that if something was to happen, you both loved each other endlessly.

Now that seems to upset Levi in a way, he doesn't want you to be in pain if he were to die out there and Levi knows that he will never be able to cope if something happens to you.

The plane starts to malfunction and you fall on the ground, holding yourself up, you swallow the cry threatening to fall from your lips. This is it.

Levi glances at you and everything starts to fall into place for him. If both of you make it out alive, he will never ever let you go ever again.

The smoke clears and you look at your hands, realization starts to hit you.

You look around to see everybody hugging their loved ones and panic as you don't see Levi anywhere until Connie grabs your shoulder and points his finger.

Levi is sitting up against a rock, tears streaming down his face. You rush to him without another word, never in your life have you run faster than you are now.

Kneeling before him, you wipe his tears away. "You did it. We did it." His hands reach out to you and you hug him tightly feeling him cry into your shoulder.

Currently here, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. The cries of Jean, Connie and Amrin are fated in the background as they see Mikasa with Erens head in her hands is hurtful but you allow yourself to be selfish for Levi.

Both of your cry against each other for a little while before Levi pulls away his hand gripping the side of your face. Words can't leave his mouth and you gently play with his hair. "I know."

The sun starts setting as you help Levi back on his feet, putting his arm around your shoulder. Your eyes land on Mikasa and your heart smashes to pieces, that could've been you. It could've. And seeing how much she loved Eren makes you wish that such a thing as love didn't exist.

But that's anger speaking, you wouldn't know how to live any differently without love, it is the only reason you're here now, because despite the odds, you wanted you and Levi to have a future together.

And it feels like the sun set early, the smoke cleared and you are left in the aftermath of the war. There is too much to process. And you're sure that with Levi by your side, these scars will fade eventually.

---------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @youre-ackermine @the-milk-anon @sixpennydame @mrsackermannx @svftackerman @luvjiro @ackermendick @laraackerman @levisbrat25 @notgoodforlife @levisgreyeyes @lovolee3 @evas-leslas @whynotsleepp

#levi #levi x reader #levi ackerman #aot levi #captain levi #attack on titan #levi attack on titan #levi x you #levi ackerman x female reader #levi fluff #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman angst #levi ackerman x you #levi fanfiction #levi angst #levi x reader fluff #levi x reader angst

[v3nusxsky]

Can you do a, Wandanat X Agere fem reader?

Maybe reader djdnt want to regress, due to the amount of missions they were getting, and she accidently messes up in a mission and Fury yells at her for it, and she regressed in her room later that night, and Wanda and Natasha find her? And reader has thus toy dog she loses snd they have to find it to calm her down?? Fluff after that.

Agere, fluff, hurt, and comfort. I believe that's what you requested.

If not, no problem, I love all your writing!!!

Sorry if it's really specific, I'm nervous when it comes to requesting

Sun,moon and stars

*Authors note~ long time no see guys! I've missed posting. Been a little scared to start back up bc of the hate and my accident really threw me for a while but here we go. Thanks to the support of my friends and my lovely girlfriend @just-your-casual-nerd I’m going to be starting with Agere for the pure reason it's less taxing on my body and brain. Smut angst etc will come when I'm a little better*

Trigger warnings~ regression little r mama and momma wandanat loss of comfort item angry fury? Sight angry Nat?

Prompt~see ask^^^^^

The past few weeks had really been insane for you, you were either on missions or filling out the paperwork from your previous missions. You'd hardly seen your girlfriends due to this, which meant the idea of allowing yourself to regress was definitely out the window. You couldn't afford to mess up the missions, exposing your secret to the team. A lot of the time it was truly hard to admit you coped this way, but Wanda and Nat seemed to love helping you through it. Not everyone is accepting of it though, you learnt that very early on in your life. Perhaps that's why you felt the need to hide.

After a recent mission with Steve, Tony and Peter you were all on the way back to the compound when Steve told you. Fury wanted to see you immediately upon landing. You instantly knew why, your gaze flickering over to Peter who was cradling his arm. It was an accident really, you didn't mean to. Your brain blanking at the wrong time allowing one of the Hydra guards to twist Peters arm painfully. His cries of pain clearing the fog that littered your brain when you needed to slip. You'd apologised time and time again to Peter and he reassured you he wasn't mad. But no matter how much he said it you knew you'd messed up. The reason he would be taken to med bay was because you weren't strong enough to stay big. Guilt eating away at you, you weren't sure how much worse Fury could make you feel.

Apparently it could get worse, the guilt eating away at you as Fury laid into you about how reckless you were, your behaviour resulting in Peters injuries meant you were suspended from the field. His exact wording was something like "till we can figure out how to fix you!" You did your best to stay silent and remain strong, crying was not something you wished to do in front of him. You don't need fixing just a break really but you knew better than to respond like that, instead opting to flee his office and head to the safety of your shared room before breaking down.

You'd missed dinner, that was why Wanda and Natasha began searching for you. They knew the mission didn't go as well as wanted so they figured you'd want space to process like normal, but you never missed dinner. You love wanda's cooking too much for that. After checking your usual spots, they headed to your room. There you were curled up with dried tear strains on your cheeks, the room around you trashed to high hell. Clearly, you were looking for something but what would you be looking for badly enough to do this? "Nat, she's" Wanda trailed off as your thoughts were loud, "Little." Now everything made so much sense. You were looking for Pup Pup.

You must have regressed alone and being unable to find your beloved pup pup, you'd cried yourself to sleep. It was truly heartbreaking to see, as your caregivers, you hadn't found one of them and were alone in such a vulnerable mind set. Your whimpers as tears began to fall again worried Wanda enough to check on your dream. Only where she would witness you reliving how Fury shouted at you, saying you needed to be fixed. Your whole body shook with the second hand fear from the dream. Both girls knew you didn't like being shouted at or anything that was loud.

"Nat, Fury, he ripped into her about Peter" Wanda whispered before going to kneel next to your body. Her hand finding your cheeks as she brushed your tears away mumbling words of comfort, "it's okay dekta (baby) momma is here." The red head assassin gave Wanda a quick nod before exiting to find Fury. She wasn't having you being treated like this when they'd been overworking you and in general ignoring your own well-being. This wouldn't ever happen again because Natasha would make sure of it.

"Momma?" You sleepily sobbed before throwing yourself into her awaiting arms, "founds me!" You cried causing her heart to shatter slightly. "That's right my darling. I have you now. Why are we sad love bug?" It was adorable how your brows joined and you scrunched your nose up in thought, "Pup Pup gones!" You gasped as if you'd only just realised that Pup Pup was missing now. You appeared to be regressed a lot smaller than you normally would. The girls were use to you regressing to about five years old, but based of this interaction Wanda guessed you were about two to three years old. "We will find your Pup Pup bug."

"Mama!" You pouted noticing her absence. "Shh love bug mana is just finishing up with work and she'll be here, how bout you and momma go on a hunt for Pup Pup?" Wandas soothing tone and her redirection to your beloved Pup Pup. Hand in hand you and Wanda set out to find the ragged looking stuffie that you'd had since you were found by Hydra. The only thing they'd let you keep at a price and you cherished it. It didn't take long for your little brain to become overwhelmed and frustrated at your inability to find the stuffie.

"Momma! No finds! Gones! Want mama! I sorry I be good give Pup Pup me now?" You sobbed clumsily clinging to her as you cried for you two lost loves. "You are good my love bug, so so good. We are gonna find your Pup Pup I promise." She hushed you as the bedroom door opened and a very satisfied Natasha came into the room. "моя маленькая принцесса (my little princess) look who mama found малыш (baby)" her sing song voice caught your attention as you knew it was only for you. "Pup Pup!!" You cried happily coming to hold the stuffie, "frank you mama!"

"You're so welcome дорогой (darling), shall we all go get a snack baby?" You nodded enthusiastically until you remembered Fury's words, "Nahuh mama" you mumbled sadly, "I'm bad, no eat when bad." This time both women came to your side and showered you with reassurance and love that you were not bad. And Peter wasn't mad at you. Fury was in the wrong to go off at you like that and you were safe with them. They wouldn't let any harm come yo you. In fact you could eat in the bedroom cuddled up together. They just wanted to care for you, so you eventually relented, your little brain not holding much room to fight so you happily settled into bed snuggling up to Natasha's chest while you waited for Wanda to return with food. Before Wanda could even return you'd passed out on Nat, Natasha looking at you with such a loving gaze Wanda felt truly too blessed to be witnessing it. Truly you deserved the sun, moon and the stars, and both women wanted to give you all that and more.

Word count~ 1354

#anon answered #v3nusxsky answers #fanfic #anon requested #wanda maximoff #wandanat #wanda x reader #wandanat x reader #wandanat x you #wandanat x y/n #wanda x y/n #wanda x reader Agere #natasha x you #natasha x y/n #natasha romanoff #nat x reade agere

[a-d-nox]

pac/pap (creature feature: werewolf): what hidden truth does the moonlight illuminate? where do you lack control? where are you in transition?

welcome to my october pac/pap creature feature series - instead of having a single pac/ pap this month, there will be five! every monday (at 5p / 17:00 EST) this october, a new creature will be coming out to play as the sun begins to set earlier and earlier... keep an out; you never know what is lurking in the darkness..

today's creature is the werewolf: song queued: "she wolf" by shakira! when was the next full moon again? phew a few weeks to go... half man, half beast, the werewolf is - according to lore - forced to transform on every full moon. the once civilized man loses control of his body and senses.

take what resonates leave what doesn't - nothing is 100% for you because these aren't personalized so please no angry comments or dms about what i am saying not being a good fit for you or that you "don't claim" just keep scrolling if that is the case. be kind, self reflect, and have fun.

last pac/pap: creature feature: the beholder - what do you see that no else does? what aren't you hearing?

want a personal reading? click here to check out my reading. options and prices!

pile one

the truth is that you must share your ideas more actively - you need confidence that matches your passion. you can trust that you will be accepted for your ideas - and if not where you first attempt to be so, you will find yourself in a more accepting place the next attempt. if you keep doubting your abilities, you might just find that you can't grow like you hope/dream to. so the spotlight (moonlight) is on you - share what you want to / are passionate about right now.

oof you are really trying to control a lot right now. things aren't going as you expected, huh? you can't control that something is close to the end of its cycle. it's okay that you are going to miss that something - know that you should be celebrating instead. celebrate your wins. you have done so much! new things are just around the corner.

a power transition in your life is underway. you are being given a chance to lead and prove your strength. make sure that you are leading from a place of wanting to see others succeed instead of one where you are asserting your power over others. you can't just be thinking about yourself right now, remember that "with power comes responsibility" - it's not just about you anymore it's about those around you too.

pile two

your disconnection for others and your beliefs seems to be in the spotlight right now. you might be feeling hopeless and alone in your situation right now - it's time to reconnect and recharge. a cleansing is needed - do not lose faith, you are right were you are supposed to be, despite how painful this moment may be. let the glimmering moonlight be a sign that healing is ahead - better days are coming.

i feel like your schedule right now is unsustainable - you are stretched too thin and juggling too much all at once. you might have too many school/work responsibilities considering your personal ones. this is all making you feel emotionally drained (have you stress cried recently - i feel like you might have). you should know that you are currently "leveling up"; anytime you level up in life, this type of challenge to your routine occurs. do things in moderation and ask for help if you need it (there is no shame in reaching out for help).

an opportunity has arisen recently that is going to change your world - likely in a monetary way. there is a new beginning on the horizon. you are getting even closer to the life that you have been dreaming of - prosperity is in your future, it is written in the stars. you are cultivating abundance for yourself and i couldn't be more proud. you have unlimited potential - keep it up.

pile three

new moon energy. there are a lot of things that you are hiding, you are also likely refusing to acknowledge the truth, and you are refusing to look at things deeply (which can be good (you're not reading too heavily into things) and it can be bad (you might not be "reading the fine print")). you aren't listening to your intuition like you should be - stop deceiving yourself. trust that you are capable and you are worthy of so much more than you are currently doing / have.

right now a relationship of yours is extremely out of balance (someone is doing all the work in the relationship or someone is extremely co-dependent in the relationship). it is not good to rely too heavily on a partner to fulfill your needs. your expectations might be unrealistic which causes you to feel even more out of control. look inward so you can better find the source of your disharmony.

i feel like you reading that last paragraph has your wheels turning - the transition ahead of you has to do with your relationships. you are noticing that there is a imbalance in what you are giving versus what you are receiving. i know that receiving things makes you feel weird (you feel unworthy/undeserving), but get use to it - haha! stop feeling obligated to give back equal to what you have received - things are being given of their own volition, no one expects you to give back what you were gifted. simply remember that kindness breeds kindness - the more comfortable you become with receiving, the more you will gain.

want a personal werewolf reading? tip 4.99 USD with the comment "werewolf" and i will privately get back to you with what hidden truth the moonlight illuminates for you, where you lack control, AND where you are in transition!

other then that, thank you for reading! don't forget to comment down below which monster you believe is coming to join us next monday?

#astrology #astro community #astro placements #astro chart #asteroid astrology #asteroid #natal chart #persona chart #astrology tumblr #tarot reading #tarot deck #tarot #tarot witch #tarotdaily #tarotcommunity #tarot cards #tarotblr #pick a photo #pick a pile #pick a card #pick an image #pick a picture #werewolf

[thebirdandhersong]

songbird's life sparknotes (both joyful and painful moments) from the past little while:

read Brian Doyle for the first time and it broke me :')) it BROKE me. If you haven't read his work, I highly recommend. That man has a tender voice much like Mary Oliver and Frederick Buechner.

read a bajillion things (book count: 72), a third of which were picture books about nature

I had one really bad day where I broke down WEEPING because on top of losing my favourite sweater (a gift from a good friend who moved away -- every time I wear it, I feel like I'm being hugged by her), being overwhelmed by schoolwork and job applications, and encountering Worse boy problems, I found that someone had been stealing from my one-pint box of French vanilla ice cream (which was literally the only thing holding me together). This hit so hard when I found one scoop's worth of ice cream left in that container

found my favourite sweater (THANK GOD)

read a bunch of Robert Macfarlane and John Koenig and Jenny Offill and Mary Oliver

listened to a lot of acoustic indie soft sad music and then had to pull myself together and listen to acoustic indie soft happy music to feel better

found that I did not, in fact, enjoy Paradise Lost, or Milton, in general

had to force myself to stop listening to Lizzy McAlpine and Phoebe Bridgers because that ish was breaking my heart

got my heart broken even more exponentially by real life, non-musical events that were unfortunate and annoying and caused a great deal of inner turmoil

learned to play guitar! and am learning to finger-pick the strings (a difficult endeavour that I have yet to master)

survived midterms. Barely

led Holy Week devotions at the dorm and LOVED it

was chosen to present a paper at the department student conference (!!!!!!!!) so am working on that now

lots of family and friend time!

was driven around for 30 min by the world's worst driver (godson) and thought I was going to die or throw up. I did neither, fortunately

cried at every Christian club meeting and church service I attended (I kid you not) because I was overwhelmed by God's grace and loving-kindness despite Everything. also partly because Everything was a lot

LOTS of walks to the sea!

Sunday mornings playing guitar under the trees. You guys it's so good it really heals my heart :')

ICE CREAM DATES WITH THE GIRLS

the boy situation got, astonishingly, Worse and then better and then even WORSE. when I was asking for prayer a second time here during Lent, it was specifically because I had two-ish days of straight up agony. It was not a good time.

the boy situation 1 (spoiler: a second one appeared. Lol what is life) ended up resolving in: the boy I was horribly in love with (the one mentioned in previous posts) is semi-dating my good friend now

the boy situation 2 (a recent and unexpected development that has caused a surprising deep stab of pain! fun times) has now resolved as of today in: I'm literally never opening my heart to anyone ever again :) I cannot deal with this anymore :) I cannae DO THIS :) God help me (a fool and a clown) :) I CAN'T TAKE THIS NO MORE

however God is good and I am resolutely holding onto hope. The sun is here, the cherry blossoms are blooming splendidly, and I have school and work and future things to worry about!

#this season has been so much guys! so much intense intense joy #and so much astonishing pain #anyway this has been life if anyone is curious lol it has been a TIME

[cycian]

You asked me for some Andreja headcanons, now I ask you for some Sarah Morgan thoughts! Any you have!

Oh lord, buckle up besties, I have a LOT

-Sarah is in her early to mid forties and is starting to grey at the temples. However, she isn't nearly as self-conscious as she expected: she takes the grey hair as a blessing, as a fact that she got to grow older, unlike so many lost to the Colony War.

-Her sleep schedule is non-existent. Not only is she a rabid workaholic, but her nightmares make it very hard to get more than five hours of sleep in.

-Everyone at the Lodge is very aware of that and will always check that the coffee stock is decent, as Sarah Morgan is chugging cup after cup of coffee and tea.

-She's not the only one with raging insomnia, so she finds herself hanging out on the Lodge's balcony with Andreja and/or Barrett a lot, since they also struggle with sleep.

-She is incredibly protective of Andreja, Noel and Matteo. She knows that they are all very capable, but she yearns to protect Noel and Matteo's ''innocence'' when it comes to death-related subjects. Her greatest relief when the Colony War ended, is that the new generation wouldn't have to suffer through the loss of their innocence.

-Her relationship with Andreja is something that she deeply values. She knows Andreja's secret and past, and tries to bring her out of her shell, step by step. She knows better than anyone else how painful it is to keep everyone at an arm's length, but to still yearn for companionship. She always makes time to at least sit in silence or work quietly with Andreja in the vicinity to provide her with quiet support.

-She puts a lot of effort in trying to make the 'deliveries' to the Va'ruun as lawful as possible, as she knows that smuggling weighs heavily on Andreja's conscience.

-Sarah loves the taste of tea but craves caffeine at all times.

-She's a smoker and is really bad at hiding it. Some nights, she stays up until the sun comes up, chainsmoking with her eyes lost to the horizon.

-Despite her best efforts, she is a catastrophic cook but is a decent baker. She's really good at following instructions but gets a little too creative when it comes to cooking.

-Her wardrobe is neatly organised per day and season, with a predetermined rotation of outfits, which makes her a prime target for Sam's teasing about her being uptight and a slight control freak.

-Though she hates paperwork, she doesn't mind doing it as much when other members of Constellation are around. For this purpose, she sometimes brings an armful of slates down to the living area to chat as she fills up paperwork.

-She and Walter like to tease each other mercilessly about expenses, but she deeply values his friendship. Though he can get on her nerves at times, he is good at reading when he ought to be teasing to alleviate the mood, and when he ought to be serious and honest.

-She hangs out with Cora a LOT. She loves the child's natural inquisitive nature and does her best to answer all of her many questions and provide her with all of her knowledge.

-She knows that most of the members consider Constellation to be a family, and although she is really happy that they feel this way, a part of her is torn, because she is really used to keeping things between her personal life and Constellation separate. With Constellation's help and the Spacefarer's advice, she starts to loosen up and is enjoying watching the lines blur.

-In order to let herself stop being the Chair all the time, and more of a part of the Constellation family, she starts planning more relaxing activities. Thus far, her favorite group activity is tableboard games (she watched Matteo tackle and attempt to bite Walter) and movie nights (Sam cried so hard at the end of a chickflick that he almost threw up.)

#sarah morgan #starfield #walter stroud #andreja #sam coe #barrett #noel #matteo #starfield headcanons

[escapismqueen]

A kind of Chenford fic but more of a 'found family' fic

Notes: Hello everyone ! I know, this is insane, I'm actually posting 🤣. I'm sorry I've been so MIA, I've just really not been in the frame of mind to write at all. But finally, I got some motivation and inspiration so here I am. I know you'll all be used to be Chenford centred fics, and while this does have Chenford in it, this is mostly a Lucy Chen fic. I hope you all give it a try and maybe even like it :) Thankyou for not giving up on me ❤And a special thankyou to my partner in chaos @chenfordspiral who is literally always there for me and has encouraged me all the way, ily ❤

Summary: Lucy wakes up sick and alone. Tim is on an op with Metro, Tamara is out with friends. Who will take care of Miss Lucy Chen?

Inc: Fluff, angst and then just lottssss of fluff. A lot of Lucy, Grey and Luna. And quite a bit of Angela and Nyla too.

Warnings: talk of childhood trauma and illness but nothing explicit.

You don't have to be sorry

Her eyes open hastily, the brightness of the morning sun immediately forcing them closed once again. As Lucy turns to her side and reaches out for Tim, the coldness of the sheets reminds her of his absence; the Metro op that he had to leave for last night. He was going to be there for a few days, so she’d be alone. Normally, this thought wouldn’t have bothered her too much; of course she misses him when he’s gone, but they’re both adults and they’re both aware that their work will sometimes take them away from each other for a couple of days. It was nothing. Two days. But as Lucy awakes more, she notices the splitting pain travelling through her head. She notices the clammy sheen on her skin, the heat radiating up her cheeks and forehead, and the nausea swirling in her chest and up to her throat. She was sick. As she begins to push her face into her pillow for comfort, the blaring sound of her alarm interrupts her. She didn’t know why, but as soon as the sound went off, the tears started to stream. 

Lucy was used to looking after herself when she was sick, she’d done it a lot of her life. Whenever she was sick as a child, her Mother and Father seemed to care more about her going to School and not ‘missing out on important learning’ than they did about their Daughter getting better. She couldn’t count the amount of times she’d had to go into School ill, coming home worse than when she left in the morning. The most affection she’d gotten from them when she was sick, was a quick feel of the forehead and a spoonful of medicine to quicken the recovery; so it’s safe to say, she knows how to look after herself. But at this moment, she doesn’t want to look after herself. She wants to be looked after. And this thought is how her tears become more rapid. Tim being away for two days now seemed like the worst thing in the world. She’d only been ill once since being with him, and it was more of a ‘hangover illness’ than an actual one, but he’d spent the day cuddling her, bringing her water, and giving her a scalp massage to ease her banging head. She cried for an hour after he’d fallen asleep, overwhelmed by the kind of affection she never received as a child, the kind of affection she was now craving. Her loneliness sunk in, not helped by the knowledge that Tamara was with her friends for the weekend so right now she had nobody.

Groggily, Lucy lifts her legs over the side of her bed and sits up, the pounding in her head worsening at the shift in positions. As she looks around the empty, quiet room, she knows she’s going to work today; sick or not.

                                                               —

As Lucy trudges her way into the station, she doesn’t miss the worried glances that are being sent her way, and it’s not long before Nyla’s grabbing her arm and pulling her into the locker room to sit down. “What the hell is going on with you ? you look like you're on death's door”. Lucy lifts her head carefully to meet eyes with Nyla, but the bright overhead lights only cause her to squeeze her eyes shut. With a concerned sigh, Nyla reaches her hand and places it onto Lucy's forehead; the way only a mother would know how. The tenderness of the touch relaxes Lucy almost instantly, despite the blinding pain not subsiding. 

“Okay, you need to go home. I say this with love, but you look like crap” The comment isn’t untrue, and Lucy knows she’s not well enough to be here, but the alternative? The alternative is being alone and being reminded of her strangled relationship with her parents- so that's not happening. Nyla sits down next to Lucy and furrows her brows at the state of her. “Lucy, don’t be stubborn about this, there’s no way you can even do your job well like this”.

Lucy shakes her head in disagreement, the motion coaxing her to wince in discomfort. Nyla scoffs at the action, knowing instantly that Lucy is going to be way too stubborn to go home today. “Alright, if you’re not going home, then you’re sitting with me and Angela today. You will not be going on patrol, and Grey will agree, so” She pushes herself up from the bench and pulls Lucy up by her hands, guiding her slowly to the detective's desks. Nyla pushes Lucy gently down into a chair and grabs a bottle of water from under her desk, along with some Tylenol and offers them to her. “Drink this, and take these. Be thankful that i had a lot of migraines when i was pregnant with Leah” She chuckles at the thought, and watches Lucy swallow down the pills with a frown, clearly not in the right frame of mind to share in Nyla’s humour. Nyla raises her brows and rubs Lucy lovingly on the shoulder. “Okay, I'm gonna go and check in with Grey. Don’t move” She looks to Lucy to confirm that she’ll stay, but the image she is met with is Lucy’s forehead flat against the table, little snores leaving her mouth. Nyla shakes her head in amusement, chuckling at her friend's condition, before turning and making her way to Grey’s office. 

                                                             —

Grey and Nyla walk up to the detective's desk to go and check on Lucy, only to be greeted with her head nuzzled into Angela’s lap, her fingers stroking her hair protectively. Both of them watch with the biggest smirks on their faces, highly entertained by the scene. Angela looks up at the sound of their snickers, her hands halting in place, eyes rolling at their expressions. “Shut up, she fell on me like this. I swear, I come to work for a break from my motherly duties, and here I am mothering this stubborn idiot”. Although she calls Lucy an idiot, the small smile on her face gives away the affectionate tone behind her words. She looks back towards them both with a questioning glance “So what are we going to do with her ?”. Grey crosses his arms in thought, Nyla soon after mirroring his actions, hoping to come up with an idea herself. Not even a few seconds later, Grey clicks his tongue and nods his head as if in confirmation to himself. “I’m going to take her back home with me. Luna’s there too, and she’d kill me if she found out Lucy had been in the station sick all day. Angela, can you be acting watch commander for the day?” Angela nods assuredly in agreement.

Grey kneels down to Lucy’s eye level, gently shaking her shoulder to wake her. “Lucy, wake up. Wake up.” At the sound of Grey’s deep and commanding voice, her eyes flutter open in confusion, her voice raspy and tired. “Mmhhh, what?” Grey wraps his hands around her arms as Angela pushes her up softly by her waist. “Chen, we're going somewhere. Get in the shop.” Lucy furrows her brows in puzzlement, but manages to stand herself up and drags herself achingly slow towards the shop. Nyla peeks a look at Angela, tickled to find that her amused smile is the same as hers, both know what the other is thinking; Grey is about to go all ‘Dad’ on Lucy, and they can’t help but love the thought. 

                                                          —

The drive to Grey and Luna’s home is particularly quiet. As soon as Lucy laid her head on the headrest, she was out like a light. Grey couldn't explain it, but he felt incredibly protective of Lucy. He doesn't know when it happened; maybe after she got kidnapped ?, but it had certainly deepend since Jackson’s death. He couldn’t lose another. He'd lost Jackson who he thought of as a son, he wasn’t willing to lose Lucy too- and this is exactly why Grey’s eyes switched from the road to his passenger seat every 30 seconds; just in case.

Grey pulled the car into his driveway and parked in his usual precise manner of taking 5 minutes to park- that Luna constantly made fun of him for. ‘You do realise this is our driveway right ? you don’t have to prove you're good at parking here?’. He chuckles at the recollection and refocuses his attention back on the sick ridden girl in his car. “Lucy, we're here”. Her eyes flutter open once again, only this time, her confusion is evidently more clear. “Where are we ?” Grey looks towards her with a warm smile and points his head in the direction of his house. “I've taken you to my home because you're too ridiculously stubborn to take care of yourself and I also don’t need you getting my other officers sick. So you’re going to follow me inside and let Luna and I take care of you. Sergeant's order.”

Lucy throws her head back, eyes closing in relief. She may not have admitted it, but she felt like hell at the station, and she sure was glad she had somewhere warm and comfy to go now. “Thanks Sarge. I’m sorry. You don’t need to look after me though, I don't want to impose, and I know you’re busy”. Grey wonders to himself for a moment. He notices the guilty look on Lucy’s face as if she's ashamed to need help; as if she feels that she doesn’t deserve it. The realisation of this clenches his heart- he’s heard stories about Lucy’s rocky relationship with her parents, but he hadn’t realised it was like this. He’s been in the police force a long time; he knows trauma when he sees it, and this is childhood trauma without a doubt. “Lucy, it’s my pleasure. Now come on, Luna will be waiting on tenterhooks  to nurse you better” They both laugh at the speculation, Grey knowing his wife to a tee, and Lucy having met her enough to know that this is absolutely going to be the case.

                                                               —

“Oh sweetie ! Look at you, you’re not fit for work, Come here.” Luna greets Lucy with a maternal expression of sympathy, and a blanket held open by her arms to wrap Lucy tightly in. She hurries forward to the doorway and envelops her into the fluffy blue blanket that usually lays on the arm of their sofa. Rubbing her hands up and down Lucy’s slender and cold arms, she ushers her over to the couch and sits her down. “Honey, go get her some of your sweats. She can’t stay in this uncomfortable uniform all day.” Grey nods at his wife's request and makes way to their shared bedroom for the clothes. 

Luna raises her hand to Lucy’s forehead, frowning at the scorching heat that's radiating off of her. “Oh, sweetie, you’ve got a fever, let me go and get you some medicine and then I'll make you some soup.” Lucy looks at Luna with slight tears in her eyes, but shakes her head to rid of them. “Oh, you don’t have to go to that trouble for me, honestly. You’ve done enough.” Luna’s brow’s furrow deeply at the words, knowing that she’s barely even scratched the surface of looking after her. “Lucy, I've barely even done anything yet. Now, you go and get those sweats on” she says as she spots her husband walk back into the room “and then you can lay down and watch TV and I'll sort the rest.” She cups Lucy’s cheeks lovingly, and pulls herself up towards the kitchen.

                                                             —

Once she’s all covered in Grey’s oversized sweats, Lucy can’t help but feel incredibly overwhelmed and emotional by the hospitality she’s being shown. She takes the moment of alone time when Luna is in the kitchen to glance her eyes over the house. The walls are cream with family pictures scattered all over. She notices one of Grey and Luna on their wedding day and can’t help but smile at the happiness that’s been captured. Her mind drifts to Tim; she wonders what their wedding will look like, and what their pictures will be like. She laughs to herself at the thought of Tim being told to pose; deciding then and there that a candid photographer is going to be a must for their wedding- whenever he decides to ask her. She lets the thought go for a moment and continues her search of the room she’s in. The sofa is a warm beige, with an array of soft and patterned pillows. The coffee table has a romance novel bookmarked on it, and Grey’s ‘best dad ever’ coffee mug is sitting proudly upon it. The house feels warm. It feels like home. Lucy wouldn't have even had to know the owners to know that it’s a place filled with love. 

Before her mind can float to an unhelpful place, Grey walks towards her with a steaming warm cup of lemon and honey. “Here you go. This should help with your throat- i noticed your voice starting to sound raspy.” He sits beside her on the sofa, passing her the drink with one hand, and occupying his other by picking up the side of the fluffy blanket that had started to fall off of her shoulder. Lucy smiles at the act, pulling the blanket more tightly to herself to ease his concern. “Thank you. I really can’t tell you how much this means to me. I was… I was dreading having to be at home alone whilst feeling like this. It reminds me of” she clenches her eyes shut and takes a deep breath “It just makes me feel crappier because I know that Tim would be taking care of me right now if he was here. But.. this is really cheering me up, so thank you.” 

Grey sends her a knowing smile, nodding in acknowledgment without pushing her to reveal any details she wasn’t yet comfortable with. “No need to thank us Chen, that’s what you do for the people you care about.” A genuine smile plasters across both of their faces, and a moment of comfortable silence falls upon them. 

                                                               —

About an hour later, Luna serves the homemade soup into a bowl for Lucy, blowing on it faintly as she makes her way to Lucy's sleeping figure on the sofa. As she lets her eyes wander on the scene in front of her, she turns to her husband, her voice barely above a whisper “Aww, bless her. I feel bad waking her up, but the soup is really going to help her throat and her fever.” Grey nods in agreement, an old family memory coming to the forefront of his mind. He looks up at his wife from his spot on the opposite couch to Lucy “Remember that labor day weekend when Dominique threw up for the entire two days, and we spent all weekend in her room watching Princess movies with her?” He smiles fondly at the memory, Luna cutting in to share another tender anecdote from the time. She giggles at the recollection, a fond smile etching onto her face also. “Yeah, I think we watched Aladdin maybe 50 times” Both of them laugh and nod their heads in agreement, the dreamy tune of ‘A whole new world’ flowing through their minds. 

Grey looks over to Lucy’s foetal curled up silhouette, her body positioned to the TV where an old Disney movie is playing. He smiles at the sight “It’s almost as if she’s still here” he smirks. Luna can’t help but spit out a loud laugh at her husband's comment, soon after covering her mouth with her free hand as to not wake the sleeping girl. She looks down towards the soup, noticing the lack of steam emanating from the bowl. “It’s the perfect temperature now. We need to wake her up.” Grey nods and shuffles over to the couch, kneeling down at her side, and begins to lightly shake her shoulder. “Lucy, wake up, soup’s ready.” Her head snaps up in an instant, the smell of warm vegetable soup clouding her nostrils. She hums in satisfaction, the scent cushioning her insides with a warm and cosy sensation. “That smells amazing!” she grumbles out. Luna follows Grey and walks over to the couch, handing her the warm bowl of soup. “I’m glad you think so; this is an old family recipe, my grandma would swear by it!” Grey and Luna each sit either side of Lucy on the sofa, resting their attention on the Television as she swallows down the contents. Both of them are gripped by the musical number flashing before their eyes, until the heartbreaking sound of sniffles and small sobs break through the air. 

The worried glances of Grey and Luna flip instantly to the shaking shoulders of Lucy. Without a second thought, Luna bundles Lucy into her arms, cupping her head into her chest as Grey takes the near empty bowl and places it onto the floor. “Oh sweetie, what’s wrong ?” Luna begins to rock her slowly and lovingly, trying her best to soothe the racking of her chest. As Grey begins his search for the tissue box, Lucy tries to stumble out a response to Luna’s question, her throat constricting her from forming a full sentence. “I.. its..my..it’sjustthatyoumustbereallygoodparents” Luna and Grey look at each other puzzled, not quite understanding the words that just came out of her. Grey gets off his spot on the couch and kneels in front of her once again. He looks at Lucy with a tenderness in his eyes, one that reminded Lucy of how he looked at his daughter when she’d come and visit him at the station. It made her heart flutter and clench. “Okay, look at me and copy my breaths okay?” Lucy nods and follows her sergeant's lead and takes several deep breaths, aware of the fact that his title at this moment is very unimportant to him. 

Luna has not once let go of Lucy since she began to cry, the tears falling from the sick girl drawing a break through her heart. It’s times like this when Luna understands where the phrase ‘Maternal instincts’ comes from. Lucy notices the tight but protective grip that Luna has on her, her heart swelling at the act, as she begs herself to never forget this feeling. She can feel the cold metal of Luna’s wedding rings through the small holes in the blanket. She can smell Luna’s feminine and rich fragrance as she envelops into her. But the thing she notices the most, is how the parts of her body where Luna’s hands don’t occupy feel cold. 

Grey keeps eye contact with Lucy as her breaths become less shaky and staggered. “Okay, now tell us what you were going to say. No rush. Take as much time as you need.” He places his hand affectionately beside her, hoping for her to take it as a promise that he’s here for her. 

“I just” Lucy takes a deep breath and everything begins to pour out “I said you must be great parents. The way you've looked after me, and I'm only your officer. It’s been really sweet. Your daughter is a lucky girl.” She looks to both Luna and Grey with a sad smile before continuing with her confession. “I’ve never really experienced anything this family-like before. I don’t have a great relationship with my parents. I never really have. They um, they expect a lot of me, and no matter what, It's just never good enough.” At this, Luna squeezes Lucy’s arm in comfort, an encouraging rub of her arm following to assure her that they can trust her with this information.

“They’ve never told me that they’re proud of me. They hate that I'm a cop; think I can do ‘better’. But I'm used to that- I mean, it's been my whole life. But this, now, with the soup and the blankets and how you’ve both gone out of your way to take care of me; I’ve never really had that from them either, and I guess it’s just brought up some stuff for me. I'm sorry, this is so embarrassing.” Grey shakes his head immediately, the expression on his face alerting her that she has nothing to be embarrassed about. “You have got nothing to be embarrassed by. What you’ve just told us- that’s some real trauma Lucy. It’s not fair that you’ve never felt that kind of love from your parents.” He thinks to himself for a moment, before deciding that he cannot let this go without telling her. “I know I'm not your Father, but for the record, I am immensely proud of you. You are an outstanding woman and an outstanding Cop. I’m proud of you every single day.” He says it with such conviction and confidence that Lucy’s eyes begin to well with unshed tears. She sniffles at his words, grateful and overwhelmed to be hearing this. “Thank you, Sir.” He takes a moment to rub Lucy’s free arm, more affected by her tears than he’d initially thought. “No need to thank us Lucy.” Luna nods in agreement with her husband, her voice now matching the same tone as him. “He’s right. We were more than happy to take care of you today, and every single word that my husband has just said is true. And for the record… If you ever need a Mom and Dad, you’ve got two right here” Luna’s smile is achingly sweet as she says this, Grey following with a sweet and bright smile of his own not long after. Lucy cannot believe she’s even hearing this, but she doesn’t question it anymore as both of their arms wrap tightly around her.

                                                                       —

As Lucy settles herself in Grey and Luna’s guest bedroom, where they both insisted she stay tonight, her phone begins to ring. Her eyes locked with the picture of her and Tim that popped up on his caller ID. It was a picture from their first official ‘uninterrupted’ date. Tim’s arms were cradled around Lucy's waist as they both looked at each other like the other had hung the stars in the sky. She smiles at the picture before picking it up, excited to talk to her boyfriend who she already misses (not that she’s going to let him in on that secret). “Hey Babe” Her normal voice hasn’t quite returned yet, the hoarse croak replacing her usual smooth and sunny voice. “Hey Sweetheart, you don’t sound too good. Angela told me you were sick-I’m sorry I can't be there for you.” Lucy wanders her mind to today- the caring nature of Nyla and Angela, the decision from Grey to take her home. The way both him and Luna doted on her; it all brings a warmth to her chest “It’s okay. Turns out I have some family to take care of me after all”. 

#chenford #therookie #therookiechenford #lucychen #timbradford #wadegrey #luna grey #angela lopez #nyla harper #foundfamily #Spotify

[nancys4gf]

could I maybe request a part two of teenage dirtbag where even though the reader is basically the reason Jonathan in "pain" he goes to their house looking out for comfort and the reader holds him while he cries into their chest but after a while Jonathan looks up from their chest and the reader is maybe holding his face or something and they have one of those moments that two characters have in movies when they look into each other's eyes and they're about to kiss and it's like that kind of tension, so Jonathan goes for it and kisses the reader but he pulls away almost immediately and starts apologizing and sobbing again but the reader gently pulls him in for another kiss (tbh I think he would cry even more after that but they're happy tears)

teenage dirtbag | jonathan byers | part two

summary: jonathan doesn't think he's special enough for you to like him back. part one

pairing: jonathan byers x gender neutral reader

warnings: angst

note: due to popular demand.... here's part two!!!! thank you so much for all your lovely comments, they mean a lot <3 i hope you enjoy!! god i love writing jonathan so muchh

̟ ̇.˚︵‿୨♡୧‿︵˚.✩

it had been a few days ever since what had happened at jonathan's house, and you still hadn’t talked about it. whenever you tried to bring it up, he’d brush it off and change the topic.

you didn’t ask about the person he liked, but you started paying more attention to the people he talked to at school. he always said that capturing the right moment with a photograph says more than people actually mean, so you also paid attention to the people he looked at.

your investigation wasn’t successful, though. he only ever talked to you.

it was a rainy monday afternoon when he showed up at your door, teary-eyed and hiding his hands in the pockets of his jacket.

“what’s wrong? oh–” 

jonathan wrapped his arms around you before you could even finish the sentence. you put a hand on the back of his head, as he sobbed on your shoulder. 

you stayed there for a moment, the afternoon breeze seeping in through the open door. 

you pulled away just enough to look him in the eye. he looked absolutely broken, and you didn’t know what to do about it. the only thing you knew was that he needed you.

without saying anything, you closed the front door and guided jonathan to your room, holding his hand tight in yours.

you laid down on the bed together, jonathan on top of you, resting his head on your chest. the sound of his sobs filled the room, your heart shattering with every breath he took.

“do you wanna watch a movie?” you spoke softly against his hair, planting a kiss on it. “maybe i can bake you something. whatever you want.”

he shook his head, tightening the grip around your waist and nuzzling up closer against the crook of your neck. you could feel his tears trailing down your skin.

“i just want to stay here,” he mumbled. “if that’s okay.”

you sighed, distractedly playing with his hair. you wished there was a single word in the whole word you could say to make him feel better. but for now, you'd hold him as close as you could.

“remember that time when i was devastated because they killed off my favorite character in a comic?” you started. “and you and will wrote an alternative ending where he lived happily ever after and saved the world?”

jonathan let out a soft laugh, his chest vibrating against your body.

“i remember.”

“i wish i could write you a happy story now.”

he looked up, his teary eyes gazing into yours.

“you look pretty,” you whispered. “your nose is all red.”

jonathan instinctively scrunched his nose, and you couldn’t help it, he looked so adorable. you leaned down, leaving a short kiss on it. his face turned even redder, but not because of the tears. 

jonathan’s presence was a beacon in your life. he was the first person you searched for in every room, the face you saw in every crowd. he was as constant as the sun, and you had always known that nothing in life could ever be that scary if he was there with you.

but what you’d just realized was that you had never thought of the possibility of jonathan liking someone, because you couldn’t bear the thought of jonathan liking someone that wasn’t you.

the realization hit like thunder, echoing off the walls of your room. it was as if you had been living your entire life in monochrome, and now you were finally seeing in color. 

jonathan, the person who’d always been there for you. who watched all your favorite movies as many times as you wanted, and recited your favorite dialogues by heart. jonathan, the boy who took all the photographs you proudly hung on your walls. the boy you’d give your life for. the boy you loved. 

and jonathan, the person who could read you like a book. he saw the way your eyes widened, your eyebrows rising in surprise, a soft gasp getting caught in your throat. and he just knew. he knew you had figured him out. 

after all those years of hiding how he felt, of averting his gaze whenever you looked at him for too long because he didn’t want you to notice that when it came to you, he always wore his heart on his sleeve. you had finally realized.

your hands had gone stiff on his hair, and he could feel your rapid heartbeat against his. jonathan was so close that you didn’t know where his body ended and yours started. you had always been intertwined, in every sense you could think of. 

he suddenly became so overwhelmed that you were real, that you were letting him hold you like this. being in your arms was the only place he wanted to be, and before he could regret it, he leaned in.

those moments with his lips pressed against yours were the closest he had ever felt to heaven. but he quickly fell from grace, because you didn’t kiss him back.

his stomach dropped, and he abruptly pulled away, choking up when he noticed your puzzled expression.

“i’m sorry.” he blurted out, a lump forming in his throat. “i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have done that. i’m so sorry, i don’t… god.”

he was rambling, and he was crying, but you had never needed anything more. you cupped jonathan’s face, pulling him close again, and kissed him. 

you kissed him, and suddenly he was the one who couldn’t move. 

your mouth was warm and inviting and he could taste his own tears in it. but it was even more magical than he could’ve ever imagined. the sensations were new and unfamiliar, but you felt nothing but joy as he kissed you back. 

you knew there was no going back now, and you didn't mind.

it was a vulnerable, lingering kiss. your hands were still on his cheeks as you pulled away and whispered, 

“is it me?”

he looked down for a moment before meeting your gaze again. “it’s always been you.”

you couldn't help feeling as if your entire world had changed, turning in a different direction. but at the same time, you knew nothing would change at all. because it was still jonathan. it was still you. it had always been the two of you.

you both leaned in again, but when his lips brushed yours, you stopped.

“wait,” you mumbled, holding his face. “jonathan–”

“i know there’s a lot to talk about,” he muttered, grazing your lower lip with his thumb. “but i just want to kiss you now. please?”

jonathan's words made your heart flutter. you smiled, nodding your head.

“okay.” he grinned, placing a kiss on your forehead before leaning down and joining your lips with his.

you and jonathan had always managed to understand each other even without words. and as he kissed you again, taking his time with every movement and touch, you knew you’d figure it out. together.

#jonathan byers #jonathan byers x reader #jonathan byers imagines #jonathan byers au #jonathan byers fluff #jonathan byers angst #stranger things #stranger things imagines #stranger things au #stranger things x reader #stranger things fluff #stranger things angst #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x gender neutral reader #jonathan byers x gender neutral reader #friends to lovers #requests

[sadlynotthevoid]

I just read this fic:

And can I say, I love the idea of Jason joining the Fenton family so much? Usually is otherwise, and I really like that, but they would be so good for each other.

He would fit so well with them, a family of bright, intelligent, people with feral overprotective tendencies and academic aspirations (no, Danny is not the exception, he wanted to be an astronaut). Jazz finally would have someone to nerd about non-ghost/technological things and he's a triumphant at the same level as her— a triumphant in a genius family.

Danny would have a Big brother who is happy to scare anyone he asks, help him with the superhero things one only can master (lol) through experience or a mentor's guide, and he can introduce him to the ghost culture. Besides, he would enjoy listening to Danny's space infodump.

Danielle and he would get along like a house on fire. He would carry her on his shoulders for fun but also so Ellie could look down on people she's being petty with. And they would exchange travel stories.

Last but not less important, Jack and Maddie could be excellent parents for Jason, especially post-resurrection. When he needs to feel safe and loved. And in a universe where Maddie and Jack turned pages and are doing better now— They're putting effort to be better parents because they love their kids— that's what he gets. Unconditional love.

He went for a lot of things and then when he was finally in a safe place, everything went down and he died. He woke up to a world that didn't change a single bit of those parts— those parts that hurt him and others that can't do anything but try to defend themselves and resist. And yet, it changed too much. The people he cares for and love were different, and he could accept that with time, but what was the point if they didn't would try to do the same for him?

Because from his point of view, they don't love him anymore or not in the same way he loves them. Not at the same amount either. And it hurts. Knowing that he's never going to be as loved as the others. That his dad prefers a fake memory of a son that he doesn't seem to remember well, an illusion, over him, a son that came back from death and cried for him even when he couldn't think. When he was a brainless zombie basically. It hurts him to know that, at his father's eyes, he worths nothing now. It hurts him every time he sees the scar in his throat.

It no surprises him when one day he wakes up feeling there's liquid fire destroying him from inside. He's having trouble to breathe and his head is screaming nothing and everything at once— Fortunately, he doesn't stay alone like that for too long.

At some moment his phone must have gone off because before he noticed it, he had it in his hand and a familiar voice was talking from the other side. For some miracle (or what Roy called his Jay-senses) Roy Harper decided to call him at whatever hour it was. They talked. What was happening? He didn't know. Is he injured? No. Is he in pain? "..." What did he need? Again, he didn't know.

For when Jason ended the call, they must have spent at least a hour on it. He vaguely remembers that the sky was still dark when he woke up and now the sun was— well, not out because it was Gotham, but it was somewhere up there.

Two hours later, Jason is driving out of Gotham, following Roy's advice. Who may not be a therapist but learned enough about mental health from Dinah to know what Jason needed. Space from the metaphorical knife in his heart. So he chose a random direction and started moving.

The next morning Jason finds himself in a town called Amity Park, Illinois, he thinks. He wasn't paying too much attention to anything that wasn't the road. Quite the opposite, actually. He was looking for a distraction.

At that exact moment, a green glowing blur collided five feet from him. Whoa, that was close. The green blur was followed by a flying... galaxy-themed child? Said child raised his hand and shouted a green beam to the crater where the green crashed.

Well, he was looking for a distraction, wasn't him? Maybe he should wait and see what's happening here. He doesn't know if the kid is a meta defending himself of a robot or just practicing his powers.

"Wao! Wao there kid! Watch the bike! I just painted it! Don't ruin my hard work like that". So, the green one was a person, not a thing. Good to know.

"Well, don't ruin MY hard work then, Johnny——", the glowing star child frowned, tilting his head. "Do you sense that? Is like—" he closed his eyes and turned around— And what kind of relationship do they have that he can do that with someone he was attacking just a seconds ago?— the green guy also did the same thing. It looked a bit funny. What were they even doing? Maybe they were searching something?

Well, he was never going to find out that spying on them like a stalker. That was more a thing of— yeah. No. Not that he was hidden, just in silence under the shadow of this big tree. So, yeah, nothing like him.

"Hey", he stepped out— and immediately got wrapped by a black whip thingy and pulled in front of the glowing people. The thing screeched. What was this?

"Shit. You're core is breaking bad man."

His what?

____

Then they carry him to Danny's home and Johnny goes for Frostbite while Danny explains him what a core is because dude looks so confused. Then he has to explain what a halfa is and boy, he didn't need another identity crisis.

Jazz arrives in the middle of this, sees his brother giving a Ghost Intensive Course resumed to a strange teenager on the sofa, and postpones her own crisis (because they ARE turning in her parents, damnit) to start damage control.

For when Frostbite comes with a core expert aside, the Fenton parents had already wrapped Jason like a burrito. Jack is seated on the next couch to him with a plate of cookies (from Tucker's dad btw), Maddie is placed beside Jason talking about his time at college, and the three Fenton children are coming down from preparing the guest room.

Turn out his core IS shattering because, for ghosts, that are partially made of it, emotions are highly important. So, experiences like abandonment or betrayal, for example, can cause damage to the core.

The feeling of burning was the energy of his core escaping through leaks. Frostbite tells them that if he hadn't got help now, he probably would have felt a sharp sudden pain in a few days and exploded. Jason almost choke on ecto-rade when he heard that, he was at the edge of his second death and would have been an explosion. Again.

He gets promptly distracted when the other yeti, a lady called Blizzard, inquires that the liquid sensation was probably a sign that he has a water affinity core, and proceeds to explain what core affinities are. He can't help but grin because that sounds just like he will be able to do water bending. What? He died at fifteen, he was allowed to act childish sometimes.

----

Anyways, that's all what I have so far. Feel free to add anything.

#dpxdc #The fentons adopting Jason #Who needs a furry when you have a giant sweet engineer and a kickass dictor lady to parent you #And yes #I headcanon Jason as water core #No I'm not explaining now #I have low battery

[thehuntss]

SAVE YOUR TEARS 2/?

•

Hi guys !

I’m so sorry, I had a long week and no time to write this chapter. But here i am now, with lot of ideas to develop this fic.

Also (sorry if I say it again hahah) but English isn’t my mother tongue so excuse me in advance for the possible mistakes.

I hope you’ll enjoy it <3

xx

The sun is gonna rise again

At the end of the day, Emily didn’t feel better. Worse, she felt weaker as hours passed and when they finally opened their home door, the pain was almost unbearable. But she couldn’t just say it and pretended it was alright although Aaron knew something was up. He was looking at her with worried eyes, feeling something was different from usual. His fiancé didn’t rush to Sergio as usual, giving hugs and telling him how much she had miss him. Instead she just rushed to the bathroom, and he could definitely hear her groans through the closed door.

“Em.” Knocking softly at the door. “Are you alright in there ?”

She didn’t answer, too busy throwing up. Her whole body was failing on her, and she hated it. Losing control was the worst thing that could happens to her. For a second she just pressed her forehead again the toilets, feeling very dizzy, her head turning. No way she could pass out again and in here, that would be so humiliating even if her fiancé had already saw her in worse cases. But being hungover and sick wasn’t something Emily Prentiss was ashamed of.

“Yeah.” She groaned, trying to at least sit up, “give me a minute.”

He knew deep inside of him that she needed time for herself and some privacy but on the other side he couldn’t just leave her on her own, considering how she was feeling. And as minutes passed, he couldn’t wait anymore, opening the door thankfully not locked, failing to hide his smile when he saw she had fallen asleep.

“Oh Em.” He thought to himself, lifting her up and carrying her the bridal way to their bedroom. She didn’t even flinch a bit, letting him put her in bed. Once he got sure she was alright, Aaron quickly made his way to the shower, still worried because it was unusual for her to get sick like this. And then he doubted, nausea could be sign of…? No way, she would have told him. When he got back to their room, he was still very confused but decided to wait for her to wake up before making theories that would only perturb his already busy mind. He quickly fell asleep, exhausted from their case, hoping Emily would be fine.

But she didn’t.

She woke up hours later, feeling a sharp pain in her stomach. And it was nothing she had known already, it was painful as hell and she couldn’t stifle the cry of pain that escaped her mouth. “Fuck.” Her stomach was burning from the inside, she struggled to sit up, her vision was blurry and it wasn’t because of the darkness around her. “Fuck…it…hurts…”

She could barely finish her sentence that she saw the light on Aaron nightstand on. He’d been barely sleeping and all of his sense were turned on, his face livid when he saw the pain all over her face. “Em what’s going on?”

His voice was raspy from sleep, but she could tell that he was worried. She didn’t even remember how she ended up in their bed. He quickly stood up, facing her, slowly stroking her cheek as she grimaced because of the throbbing pain in her abdomen. Tears were rolling down, and she knew lying would definitely not be smart, she was clearly in pain and he could see it crystal clear.

Without more hesitation Aaron grabbed some sweatpants, getting ready in seconds and grabbed her things, stuffing his keys and phone in his pockets, this time he would not ask her, he was dragging her. “We’re going to the hospital, and no it’s not a suggestion.”

She opened her mouth to protest but the sharp pain answered for her as she cried out. “Let me help you baby.” He said, lifting her up, ignoring his back that would definitely not thanks him later.

They rushed to the hospital, Aaron using his federal advantages, not really caring about anything else than Emily. He got totally lost when the nurses took her away from him, unable to stay in here alone and wait when the love of his life was being examined. He had no ideas of what was happening, and the way she looked that scared only made him wants to protect her at all costs.

After what seemed an eternity Aaron, who was almost asleep in the waiting area saw a doctor coming to him. He jumped on his feet, a worried look he couldn’t hide in his face.

“Agent Hotchner?” The doctor asked, clearly seeing the way the other man was nervous. “It was an ectopic pregnancy, we stopped the bleeding, she will be fine now.”

He had never heard of it. The doctor saw his confused stare and started to explain, every words hitting Aaron right in his chest, his heart exploding when he heard that the baby didn’t make it. So she was really pregnant, and she didn’t even know it…

“Does she…”

He nodded. “We told her the second we saw it on the ultrasound. She told us she had been to the doctor but ectopic pregnancy can be hard to detect. She was approximately 6 weeks along.”

“Will she ever be able to carry a baby after that ?”

Aaron didn’t recognize his own voice, it was almost trembling. He was livid, trying to understand how their life had change that quickly, they could have been parents together, and now what he didn’t know he would have was leaving an empty spot into his heart.

The doctor softly smiled, giving him a small tap on the shoulder. “It can happen, but it won’t stop her getting pregnant and bring a child to the world. She will just need regular check ups, and everything will be fine. I’m sorry for your loss.”

He looked sincere, and Aaron only nodded, swallowing hard. He needed to see her, she was probably scared and confused. “Thank you. Can I see her?”

“Sure, she will probably be a bit groggy from the anesthesia but she’ll recover, you should be able to take her home in a few days.”

Aaron thanked him again and made his way to the designated room, pausing a moment when he opened the door, seeing his beloved one in the bed, her face was pale but the pain had fade away. At least she wasn’t suffering anymore and that’s all he wanted, seeing her cry had literally broke his heart in pieces. And at this very moment he was glad that Jack hadn’t been in the house, for nothing in the world he would want to scare his son again.

He decided to wait on the chair next to her, holding her hand to let her know no matter what, she would never be alone anymore. Aaron tried to stay up as long as he could but exhaustion hits him so hard he gave up and fell asleep. He woke up hearing small winces of pain, and as he opened his eyes he saw that Emily was awake, clearly trying to sit up.

“Sweetheart…” he couldn’t hide his relief when he saw she looked better than hours ago. She was very pale, but she was back to him.

“I’m sorry…”

Her voice was shaking, she wasn’t looking at him, ashamed. She had been pregnant two times in her life, first time she wasn’t ready and decided to abort because that was the best option. This time she knew they would be ready together, but she couldn’t make it because her body had failed her, again and she felt useless.

He frowned his eyebrows and kissed her hand. “You have nothing to be sorry for sweetheart, what happened is not your fault. It’s no one fault do you understand ?”

She didn’t move, still feeling guilty, tears silently rolling down her cheeks. He cupped her face so she could look at him, not in the world he would want her to feel bad about something she couldn’t control. “I didn’t know it. The baby.”

Her heart was cracking at every words, her chest full of sadness and her stomach empty. Her hand automatically rubbed it slowly, her brain realizing she had been carrying the perfect mix between her and Aaron. And now it was all gone.

“Emily, sweetheart.” His voice was shaking, and she saw tears rolling down how cheeks.

They both cried silently at the loss of their baby, none of them ready for it, their lives were already so bruised they couldn’t imagine adding something else to it.

Both of them needed each other that was inevitable, they always had this connection even when they both even didn’t know about it, closing eyes when everyone was pointing out this fact. They were both very stubborn that wasn’t a secret.

“Come here with me.” She whispered, tapping the bed, trying to make more place for him to lay. He did what he had been told so, slowly enveloping his arms against her bruised body.

“I didn’t know I was ready for a baby. Until today…” she whispered, her head resting on his torso.

“I was wondering if you were pregnant…with all the nauseas, when you passed out. And I’ve realized i wanted this with you. As long as you want it too, it’s your body sweetheart.” He slowly replies, kissing her front head. He knew her backstory and would never put pressure on her, that was her decision.

“I’m sorry.” She repeated again, fighting against tears coming back.

“You don’t have to be sorry.” He replied patiently, rubbing her back, soothing her like he would do with Jack after a scary nightmare. “It’s not your fault. You could have never planned it to happens.”

“I know but…if I had known about the pregnancy, maybe I could have protect this child…”

“Nothing can prevent what happened, the doctor told me it was inevitable. Beside, I’m glad you’re okay, you’ll recover and maybe we can try again?”

She can’t help but chuckle, her fiancé being the sweetest humain on this planet. “I would like to.”

“Good.” He kissed her again, resting his head against hers. “Try to sleep a bit sweetheart, rest yourself, the better is waiting for us.”

It sounds like a promise, but he know the world will give them a better future, no matters how dark it gets, the sun will rise again. She smiled softly, letting her drift to sleep, feeling safe in his arms.

And that’s how the team found them hours later, they had been worried when none of Hotch or Emily showed up at work so they called Jessica.

“If a story could be written, it would be about them.” Derek said, looking at his friends throughout the window of the room, feeling sad for their loss but knowing they would grow even more strong.

“They don’t deserve it.” Garcia whispered, being very emotive as always, crying softly. She couldn’t bare the knowing of her friends being hurt.

“No one does. But they are strong, and we’ll be there to help them whenever they need to. We’ll let them time, that’s the best to do.” Rossi added, looking at his sleeping friends. “Come on kids, we’ll come back later, Hotch would not want us to stay here day, we have some work to be done.”

They all agreed, leaving the flowers and chocolate they brought near the door, silently making the promise they would always be there to support each other, because that’s how their BAU team worked ever since.

#hotchniss #aaron hotchner needs a hug #emily prentiss needs a hug #criminal minds #hotchniss fic #criminal minds fic #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #idiots in love

[captain-igni]

idiAzul I never posted

Azul had been more stressed out than usual lately. He was a successful business owner, with a very loving husband who had made success as well. What could be better? Well, it seemed, life knew what they needed, and they ended up with something neither had ever thought about before. A baby. It wasn’t exactly a hard pregnancy, Azul just found it to be a bit embarrassing. 

When their daughter was born, Azul hated going back to work within days. He would go to work, despite terrible pains in his hips from the birth and general existing complications, suffer through his entire day at the office and the meetings, and come home for bed. He didn’t have too much time to bond with his newborn, and a lot of the time when he got back to his home, his heart sank a little when he saw Idia doing all the work. 

Some days, when Azul managed to stay awake when he got home, he would eat alongside his husband, but he couldn’t even manage to hold his baby, she was either asleep or with Idia every time. The mer felt terrible, he couldn’t even step up and be a good father, it made him a terrible husband..

Having just arrived home from work, an hour early thanks to him having a great assistant, Azul found Idia getting his coat on. “Where are you going?” Azul asked, sliding his shoes off. “Store.” Idia responded, his keys in between his teeth as patted himself down, making sure he had his phone in one of his pockets. Idia took his keys from his mouth and gave Azul a quick kiss. “I’ll be back in less than half an hour, she’s asleep, I have a couple bottles made in the fridge, I love you.” Azul smiled, repeating the last words as he watched Idia go out the door. 

Well, such a warm welcome. Azul sighed as he finally made it to the kitchen, opening the fridge. Right, the store made sense now that he was looking. Their fridge was basically empty, and Azul wondered if either of them had properly eaten in the week since Nerida was born. 

Azul was barely able to begin piecing a dinner together when he heard the baby monitor in the living room go off. He walked over and picked it up, still hearing the muffled cries. His shoulders tightened, and part of him realised he hadn’t held her in so long now, he felt guilty. His hands wobbled a bit as he set the monitor back down and hobbled down the hall to his bedroom. Their doctor had recommended that she sleep in the same room as them for the first few weeks, for safety, and Azul took that very seriously. They even had a travel cot set up in Idia’s office so he could watch over her when he decided to pull an all-nighter. 

The door swung open, and Azul walked in, over to where his daughter lay, squirming around and crying, face red. Azul couldn’t help but smile as it reminded him of Riddle. No, he had to get his thoughts straight.

He picked up the baby, holding her as gently as he could, while still being firm. He was trying to use just one of his arms to hold her, while the other kept him balanced, but he gave up and quickly sat down on the bed. She was still crying, and Azul wasn’t sure what to do, Idia was much better with this than him! He carefully bounced her a few times, then went and propped himself against the pillows. This was a good spot for him, right?

Sighing softly, Azul laid Nerida on his chest, rubbing her back. A hum escaped his vocals, and a tune started to form, a smile on his lips. He reached over to the side table and grabbed her pacifier, pushing it into her mouth. She still whined, but there was less noise coming from her now. “Up where they walk.. Up where they run..” Azul could feel Nerida trembling less and less. “Up where they stay all day in the sun..” He started to get up off the bed. “Wanderin’ free..” He kissed her forehead. “Wish I.. Could be..” Nerida was now right back where he found her, sleeping soundly. “Part of.. That world..” 

#twst #twst mpreg #idiazul #idiazul mpreg #implied mpreg

[cato-of-blamesociety]

32 Weeks Tracklist/Song Picks pt. 2 (weeks 9-16)

How/Why did I choose/chose to use the songs I did

*Full breakdown, updated in real time(weekly)*

9. Hurt Feelings x Mac Miller

I have to be completely honest. I never was a fan/gave Mac a chance until after he passed. I had begun listening to Anderson.Paak. Going through his discography was so fun. I get to Oxnard and "Cheers" gives me chills. Q-tip is on here repping for Phife- Dawg and then Paak is pouring out his soul saying he misses his friend (Mac). From that point I made it a mission to check Miller out. I wasn't impressed at first. As a rapper (who started in middle school) I was shocked that this kid made it anywhere. I keep listening. I start to understand his concept, his target audience, and realize that he is developing into something major. Macadelic was interesting to me, as well as Watching Movies.... This time period in hip hop was weird to me at the time, but going back it all makes sense. I cringed my way through Faces...I hated it first because..spoiler we know how Mac goes out and he is taunting us through out this whole album(today, I understand/appreciate his work on that project and it is a big inspiration for me with 32 Weeks). Go:od Am was a fav, as he seems more healthy and is trying to get better. I fucked with that album heavy. Divine Femine was an instant classic. I shared with my wife and we enjoy it together. Now, I must add, during this dive into Mac's cuts, I also stumbled across Dissect Podcast. The guys on there broke down everything and made me truly feel closer to Mac's Swimming in Circles. I cried so much in the fall of 2021. I had been through hell, and his lyrics just made it all make sense. Fast forward to 2023. I knew I wanted to incorporate Mac's tracks in my project but didn't know where to start. I did know I did not want to fool with Self-Care. I landed on Hurt Feelings. This beat had me unleash my pent up frustrations in dealing with members of my group that weren't moving with the same pace as me. I get it, you aren't ready, but at the same time, don't bring yourself down. I truly wanted, especially one in particular, to just be ok with himself. I wanted him to know that yes, Cato is grinding, but it is for all of us. In the meantime, support me by answering the phone, sharing ideas, and take care of yourself. Unfortunately, a few days before this track was posted, another group member(my best friend) was in a fatal car accident. So now even though the song is suppose to be a pep talk, lowkey it now feels like a send off. I also recorded a 32weeks track to Mac's Wings...more on that when the time gets closer. Anyway, if you read all of this, I appreciate you. I hope you are enjoying 32 weeks, because like most hero journeys, it is only going to get more darker before the sun come out. "Took a snapshot of hope, put it in a frame. Reminding us that sunshine always follow rain. It is what it is, found purpose through my pain...ooooo, yeah, yeah." *also, try to pick out as many Mac lyric references as possible!!

10. Ms. Mural x Lupe Fiasco

This verse started out as an oldie. I had never finished it. I had initially wrote it to a JID type beat on Youtube. When I was going through rhymes and searching more beats, I knew I wanted to incorporate Lupe Fiasco's Drill Music In Zion. There are so many sweet beats to choose from...however, 1. at the time it was hard to find other instrumentals from the album, and 2. Ms Mural had the right tempo, haunting-ness, and cadence for a verse about grief to be delivered. The album itself is of course fire. Lupe does a lot of stuff that I don't want to ruin here, but makes it worth a listen. Ms Mural is like the 3rd installment of the "mural" collection which makes it even more cooler. One thing I will spoil about the album is the fact that Lupe allows the beats to breathe. He knows when to not speak, when to just let the music speak to us. To me, its like he took his time, and was like "here you go little brother, vibe to this beat for a minute before it goes off". This felt like love and very much appreciated it. Not gone lie, the times he allows the beat to ride, had me in tears. Sh*t is beautiful lowkey. *Sidenote, this will drop 9/14, and we bury my friend on 9/18. Pain of loss is tricky. To those dealing with death right now, I hope you are taking care of yourself. If no one told you that they love you today, just know that I do!! #32weeks

11. Massa x Tyler, the Creator

Ok, I used to be ashamed to say this but now Tyler actually confirms/validates me. I never was a fan of Tyler, or the Odd-future crew. I remember Yonkers dropping, and I heard the beat first. Definitely sick(in a good way lol). Then a co-worker showed me the video…my first reaction, ewwww! I knew that bug had to be fake…I was wrong. I just knew he was doing this all for clout/going viral. That part may be slightly true, however in “Massa” (and in several interviews) Tyler just flat  says that he was going through his own development and really didn’t know how to express it. I mentioned before, that I am a huge fan of “Dissect Podcast”. Cole and the other talking head helped me understand Tyler’s direction/trajectory since stepping on the scene. They breakdown Flowerboy, and  Igor and really help listeners grasp the major art this man is giving us. Call Me If You Get Lost was an instant hit/classic to me following the previous albums. He has DJ Drama on here doing his thing, Tyler is more on par with living his life and bettering himself, and is spitting some dope lines/bars. I knew that when I began 32 Weeks I needed a Tyler track. Several tracks on the album stuck out but there was something about the intro, and the way the beat comes in, with Massa that had me keep it on repeat. The opening lines I came up with were supposed to be super gritty and cheeky at the same time. On the project, death, and the fact that we can’t out run it, is heavily on this project and well…what happens after we die? The natural move was to begin talking about spirituality and how I or we, or people in general perceive God and religion. At this time, my son was truly asking about God and who that person is. He had been talking with a classmate and his friend actually shared his thoughts with my son. I chose to not mock or shut it down. I chose to expand on that knowledge. We had some great talks about it. I usually spoke freely about God in my music but at this point, not this extent, where I am on the skeptical/unsubscribed side of things. I started my own spiritual journey back in 2012, finally expressing to my mom in 2016 that I no longer follow Christ. Naturally she thought she made a mistake with me but that’s not true. Anyway, due to the people I know hearing this, and maybe thinking they knew me and now they may feel some type of way, has caused me to feel higher levels of anxiety. Since it dropped today (9/21/23) I already feel slightly better. I respect everyone’s beliefs, faith, and religion. But If you ask me why I feel like I do, I will tell you. Anyway, if you are reading this, thank you for spending your time with me. I love you and appreciate you.

12. The Halo x Marconi Union

I have this weird thing were I can be inspired to write from any type of music. I actually fell in love with Marconi Union during my Graduate School years. I had been procrastinating on a 30 page paper that was due the next day or so. I was freaking out, high anxiety and the works. I remembered that someone had mentioned this track called Weightless. Weightless is/was known for relieving stress because its totally lofi, but also moves at 60 bpm which instinctively helps us slow down and relax. Weightless was so successful that fans were requesting a longer version. The band made an 8 minute version and a 30 minute version. On youtube you can find a 10 hour version(linked above)! Since then, I have fallen in love with their catalog. On a specific day during the 32 weeks writing phase, I had a rough morning with my oldest son. I can’t remember exactly what the issue was but the feeling left me empty, like doubting my abilities as a father. On the route to drop him and his brother off at school, I put on “Signals” the 2021 album released by Marconi Union. I was like ‘yeah that’s how it feels right now.” The Halo starts to play and I began humming along. Words began coming…”Even if I fly…I still fall..” “I knew that if I came with all the proof…” It was on this day I realized that I had the power to take an emotion and turn it into sound that can resonate with humans and connect us. I hope that the track makes up feel seen and understood. I hope that you realize you are stronger than you know/feel, and that even though we fall, we can always get back up. My favorite line: “Doubting all my might is like the crushing blow, won’t get back up this time..”. – This is a reminder that doubt kills dreams, don’t let it kill yours!

13. Leslie Odom Jr x Wait For It (Hamilton Musical)

I know that people everywhere already remixed/redid/parodied/etc the Hamilton Musical. This is one is technically an older instrumental for me to use as well. However, when I was in the writing process for 32weeks, I was struggling to find the next instrumental, but I remembered this album and started listening more. Because I was late to the musical (I caught it on Disney plus when it was released on the platform in 2020) it still feels new to me. All I can say is Lin is a genius. In all the [cinematic] works that he has contributed to musically, you can hear his rhymes penetrate the material making it elevate to greatness. Hamilton has so many noteworthy tracks I wanted to use such as “Nonstop”,  “Guns and Ships” or a huge favorite “The Reynold’s Pamphlet”  but there is something about the tenderness, yet strength that operates on “Wait For It" that always moves me to tears…not really sadness, more like peace that somethings we just have to wait for. Leslie delivers an amazing performance that truly takes Lin’s words, and turns them into a mood worth revisiting.  In this track, I breakdown the timeline of the inception of B.L.A.M.E. , the decline, and now resurgence of the idea. It is a reminder that this music is therapeutic, personal, and keeps me feeling gratitude that I can create.

14. SZA x Kill Bill

Let's just clear the air right now....yeah everything I write is true, and to the best of my memories ability...especially when dealing with events that happened so long ago. This one was hard to write but before we dive into that, I want to acknowledge Sza. SOS has been viewed as a long awaited project and she totally delivers. The album is filled with awesome musicality's. Specifically, Kill Bill for whatever reason just laid on my heart. When writing 32weeks, this instrumental stuck out the most to me. I vibed with it. Those opening lines came to me easily, because I wanted to make it clear that I am happy with my life right now, and do not intend to try to revive old love lost. I believe if you pay attention, you can hear my honesty piercing through. I didn't want to hold back. A lot of the events or relations I discuss, could each have their own song. The longest one I talk about is the betrayal of a female friend who lied to her family that I slept with her, got her pregnant, and God knows what else, all to protect the parents' friend she was actually laying with. It hurt because I had no idea and people, such as a love interest, were mad at me for this and I was confused. I had been meaning for a long time to write about it, but the words never came out right. This time around I vomited it all out. Hell, I still have the Facebook messages of this person denying the info her brother gave me. In the end, the idea is to forgive, let live, and move forward. By writing all this out, and expressing hope that her and all the others find peace and happiness, has made me feel at peace myself. I can finally put that mess to rest. I am grateful for the woman I have in my life. If you are reading this just know that you are worthy of love, peace, and respect. Those young adult years get messy. My hope for you is that you navigate it all with courage and integrity. I hope you enjoy the visuals, and the music. If no one has told you today that they love you, I do!

15. Vince Staples x Take Me Home

Look, ever since I got hipped to Mac, I got pulled into Vince Staples. The Stolen Youth tape introduced me to vince and of course his feature on FACES x Rain made me go back and chech his whole discography. When I caught up on Staples' work, I believe he was just then released/releasing his self-titled record,"Vince Staples" album. I played it just about everyday. I love his authencity as a person who really doesn't love being a "rapper" but rather sees it as a way to connect to creating a better life for him. He is pretty candid about it and I respect it because even though thats true, he still puts effort and honesty in his music. When I was writing 32Weeks I knew I would incorporate Vince in the mix. This album had many tracks I wanted to utilize but Take Me Home(start at 8.14 mark), just takes the cake. The instrumental always give me chills, and the opening line...I knew from the jump I was gonna flip it for myself. "I don't wanna die, but I will for the cause...". I switched it to "I don't wanna kill but I will for my loves". I set my intro as my family means alot to me, and I do what I have to to protect them. After that the verse started coming out of me as a moment to reflect on my childhood. This mostly encumbers issues of race, bullying, loss, fitting in, and just how it all progressed from elementary to high school. As far as track number, it sits right before the halfway mark, adding to the 2nd phase of #32weeks doubt, self pity, and really just the dark themes expressed and explored in phase 2. I visit another Vince track later in the tape and I can't wait to share it with you. The visuals in this release use imagery from John Wick, Us, Get Out, interviews with Wayne Brady/Michael Blackson, Big Mouth, and Coach Carter. If you are reading this, I appreciate your time and hope you are doing ok. I love you, and I hope you tell someone you love today, that you love too! We never know what people are going through, but when we have the love of others surrounding us, we feel like we can handle anything!

16. J. Cole ft. 21 Savage, Morray x My Life

So....I don't know if J. Cole is my favorite rapper, however I do find myself revisiting his albums often. 2014 Forest Hills Drive was a turning point I really fell in love with this man's craft. I appreciated his shift in conscious, attempting to distribute a more positive and uplifting message in his music. Kendrick is one I feel has mostly focused on giving us the type of love in his music, specifically in his albums. Kendrick though, can kind of come off too complex/deep to point one may miss the message. Cole's approach is so laymen in approach that you can't miss the message but at the same time you still contemplate what he is getting at. 2021 was a rough year for me. Especially going into the fall school year, The Off Season presented so many affirmations and motivations for me to push harder to make it through. Tracks like Amari, hell the opening track ft. Cam'ron! Cam is an emcee I grew up listening to, had mad respect for, but haven't checked for in a while. Hearing his voice amp up Cole gave me chills. When I was writing 32weeks, I knew I would use a Cole beat...but which one?? I wanted it to me more recent, but like all tracks I use, I wanted it to be meaningful to me. On 'My Life', the opening lines of the sample, Cole talking about how we can't rush God, the way he opens his verse, and 21 Savage's flow all contribute to me falling hard for this track. So around my 14th/15th verse(I didn't necessarily write these in tracklist order that you come to know) I was really nervous and losing hope. Guys, I truly didn't think I could write 32 verses...especially in the time frame I set for myself. But then, I don't know what happened. I played this instrumental and I instantly heard in my head "Spiraling up, just like my ancestors DNA. Hashtag 32 weeks, my nigga we halfway!" Then the idea of using the length of the beat (just over 2 minutes) as a vessel taking me back in time to warn my younger self seemed like the right move. I mostly focus on the mistakes of not going all in with music, not seeing how much Erin truly was the one the whole time, and not standing on my own like I should have back then. I end the track with singing to my younger self that although things seem dark right now, listening to me now, things will workout. Unfortunately, I didn't heed those warnings. Sometimes we have to be hard headed and go through trials and tribulations in order to develop into the person we needed/were always meant to be. With all that said, I hope you feel this one. The relief I feel right now is the same sentiment it was when writing that 16th verse. Now, it has been the 16th video, and I feel like I can truly complete what I started. Besides, whether people see this or hear this, the goal is for me to do this for me....and I am!

#tyler the creator #mac miller #lupe fiasco #marconi union #Youtube #hamilton musical #lin manuel miranda #leslie odom jr #sza #kill bill #Home #Vince Staples #Norf norf #jcole #mylife #21 savage

[observeowl]

Best Buddy S.J

Scarlett Johansson x Reader

Summary: R lost her best friend and Scarlett comforts her

Scarlett POV From the door of Y/N's bedroom, I could tell how devastated she was. Her knees were close to her chest as she pressed her lips together trying to hold back her tears.

Y/N's dog had just passed away, and although she saw it coming as his health was deteriorating and the regular visits to the vet, it didn't help in preparing her heart for the sorrow it was experiencing.

Graham, her dog, had been having diabetes, kidney problems and his vision was getting blurry. He was a lot more tired and less energetic as the days went by. The usual one hour walk would get reduced to half an hour or sometimes not at all as he hardly had the energy to get up from where he was laying.

After much consideration, Y/N and I made a painful decision to schedule his goodbye. It wasn't easy for Y/N as she cried a lot that day. She wasn't ready to say goodbye to her baby just yet.

But, just like his mother, he never does what he was told. He decided he didn't want any needles or poking and laid by their front porch with the sun on his fur and drifted away.

Y/N and I were shattered. Graham was her dog for 14 years. He was a part of Y/N's life before I even met her. Graham was always a cuddly dog, needing to be in our personal space, sitting on our laps even though he was obviously way too big to do so, kissing and licking our faces. He always loved his belly rubs. Sometimes, he would sleep in our bed and follow us around the house.

Y/N always joked that Graham had claimed me instantly and were best buds. It was like I was his favourite, whenever he wanted to play, he would bring his toys to my feet and nudged me before running to his play area.

We were buddies but Graham was ultimately HER dog. When he started to have health problems or any time he didn't feel his best, he cemented himself on her and only wanted her cuddles no matter how I tried to cheer him with his favourite toy. Playing, something he has been doing less and less of.

That morning he left us, he was burrowed in her arms so tight and didn't want to allow Y/N to get out of bed with him. Y/N and I realised now he was saying goodbye.

I miss him terribly, more so Y/N. Graham gave us so much and left such a massive hole in our hearts and lives. We're only hoping he can play as much as he wants where he is now. He's such a special baby and I was grateful to be a part of his life.

I quietly made my way to her and placed her head on my shoulder. Slowly, she uncurled herself and wrapped around me, snuggling her face in the nook of my neck. Shortly later, I felt my shirt getting wet and I rubbed her back gently. "It's okay, he's in a better place now." Her cries turned into a messier sob and I held her tighter hoping she found safety in my arms.

#scarlett johansson #actress #sad #best buddy #my writing

[pelibirdie]

SAGE X READER, STAY

Author's Note: Hi!! Idk if i posted this but here u go @pugwitharug enjoy the fic :D 💜💕💜

You laid in bed. It was long past dawn, the sun had risen up. The  weak rays of sun threatented to enter your room as the closed curtains blocked them. Sunlight may have been nice, but it was not nice today. Or have been for the past few weeks for honesty. That being said, the shift in your behavious didn’t go unnoticed by the remaining starsworn. Concern grew in them bit by bit for they knew the times you were happier. This was certaintly not one of them. If anyone were to be affected more than the rest about your demotivated self, it was Sage. After everything you have done for him, he didn’t think of you any less than his world. You were the beacon of light he tried to find in his darkest moments and in the hardest of situations.

“MC?” Sage walked in to your room, not minding knocking. There you laid on the soft mattress, hair a mess an eyes tired. He wondered if you had gotten any sleep to begin with. He tried to think of a joke to make you perhaps lighten up a little. Shutting the idea in an instant, he realized the situation was too...delicate for him to crack a joke. “Ah, what did they do when I was sad?” he tried to remember. The first thing that came to his mind was simple: stay. Like you always did. Though thick and thin. And this was your thick, and his turn to stay. He strided rather shyly towards your bed. Sitting on the edge with his eyes on you. “Hey.” he said. It was calm. You nodded in response, sighing shortly after. You turned on your arm, giving him space if he had decided to lay down with him. He always did. And it seemed like this time was no exception. 

He lied down there, right beside you, spooning you. “What’s up?” “Well,” you began, finding it hard to even speak. Today was a whole new tired day. Sage tried to remember again How did you usually cheer him up? He kissed you on the cheek. “Hey, things are tough for you right now and I get it. I really do. You were there for me at my worst. So the least I can do is...hmm.” Sage cut himself up. Seeming to think for a while. Suddenly, he got up and out of your room. You only watched. Pulling your warm blanket over yourself. Minutes passed and Sage came with… a tray? You were a little confused, so you sat up on your bed. Sage placed the tray on your bed. 

“Is that bacon?” You asked. It wasn’t just bacon but aslo some pancakes too. Though they were a little burnt. It seemed Sage was better at cooking meat reather than baking. He also put down a cup of water. You looked at him. Such acts from him seemed so unusual of him. “I remember your food making me feel a bit better. Though I cannot cook as good as you, I...attempted something.” Sage hesitated while speaking. It wasn’t much of a breakfast perhaps, but you still considered it to be morning. “Well, I am not too good with words. As you might know-” Sage began “Thank you.” you cut him off. Pulling him in and hugging him from where you sat. “I know it’s hard. World is unfair for hurting you. I would’ve gotten your entire pain for myself if I had the chance. You are family to me and though I am not the best support, I’ll stay.” Sage hugged you back as you cried onto his unarmoured shoulder. He didn’t even shift. He was thankful he could even be beside you. And though he had admitted he was foreign to a healthy treatment of sadness, he learned it all from you. How to love, how to be patient, how to support people for good. He was thankful he had met you and he was thankful that he ever had the chance to love you. For he too was not foreign to pain and sadness. He held you and carassed your hair, slowly breathing as he shifted to lay with you again. So there he was, you in his arms and him humming a shanty. Perhaps not a joyful one, yet his voice soothed you a lot. “Listen, I love you. And I will stay with you through everything you hear me? I’ll fight whoever there is to fight, I’ll wait no matter how long you need me to.” He said. Kissing you on the forehead. “Now let’s eat a little.” “Ok fine.” you mumbled, reaching for the glass of water first, then to the bacon. Well, better start the day then.

#last legacy #fictif #fictif last legacy #fictif games #fictif sage #sage fictif #sage lesath #last legacy sage #sage last legacy #fanfic #peli writes #he's my little meow meow #i love him sm my stinking catman

[tvrningout-a]

ISSA MEME FROM A WHOLE BLOG AGO | @sozokami gets an old meme response!

i think the prompt was something like " your muse wipes my muse's tears. " i happened to think about this response today and went searching for it in the drafts of my old blog! at the time i started writing it, it got so long to the point that i had no idea how to end it, so i saved it for later... and then i went on hiatus and moved blogs asdf well, i hope you enjoy it, space! i couldn't just keep it to myself after re-reading it :' ) to anyone else reading, major spoilers lie ahead if you haven't read the entirety of the kny manga!

     suma knew victory wouldn’t come cheap. she knew her family was lucky to have come out of the corps alive albeit a little roughed up. but they’re together nonetheless -- even as they wait for the sun to rise, even as they wait to hear news of muzan’s demise ( because suma refuses to think for a second that he’ll defeat the slayers this time ), the uzui family is together, and that is something of a miracle.

     the kami only have so many miracles to give.

     suma knew to expect heartbreak after the initial rush of triumph and relief, but there had been a part of her that remained hopeful that most of their comrades would come home banged up but breathing. she remembers an aunt once telling her hope breeds despair, that it is better to expect the worst than to be crushed by disappointment. as a kid, she thought it was a very pessimistic way to view the world and refused to take those words to heart. now, suma understands. 

     she cries a lot during the weeks following muzan’s defeat, and the retired kunoichi feels guilty each time because the others keep themselves together much better than suma can. they don’t ignore their grief, of course, and they all share their regrets ( words they should have told someone, a trip they promised another but never did get around to, missed opportunities they can never get back ), yet suma wonders if consoling her doesn’t become a little taxing. she’s always felt so deeply -- it isn’t easy to stop the tears once they start, nor is it easy to hold them back. to console her when they’ve all lost their friends... well, isn’t it a little unfair to her spouses?

      so suma tries to keep her tears to herself, at least for a little while, until she doesn’t feel so sad when hinatsuru makes sakura mochi or when she sees a butterfly in the garden. as it would turn out, though, suma isn’t very good at hiding things from her spouses. in fact, she’s horrible at it, and the only reason they leave her be for a time is to see if she simply needs to be alone. but it’s hard, and eventually tengen has enough of waiting. to suffer alone and in silence isn’t suma’s way at all.

     when he finds her, she’s holding a garden snake ( who would very well bite the kunoichi were it not for her careful grip of its head ) and openly weeping... but quietly. her bottom lip is caught between her teeth, looking rather red from the amount of pressure, and tengen calls her name only to startle suma bad enough that she loosens her hold on the snake.

     she has a new reason to cry then, as the moment it has a little leeway, the garden snake bites suma’s hand. 

     after a lot of wailing and careful prying of fangs out of flesh, suma sniffles as tengen carefully tends to her injury. she watches his large hand so delicately clean her wound, feeling warmth blossom in her chest that helps ease the pain. why was she holding a snake? he asks. because a bird was eyeing it, she replies. her husband hums and finishes wrapping a bandage around the bite.

     his magenta gaze rises to meet her eyes, soft yet firm when he finally asks, “ why were you crying, then? ”

     there’s no lying to him, and truth be told, suma really doesn’t want to. tears spring to her already puffy eyes. “...it made me think of iguro-san. ”

     tengen is already cupping her cheek when the tears fall. his thumb brushes away the traitorous drops as suma lets loose at last, crying and crying loudly. she misses everyone, she feels sorry for not spending more time with them ( she never even knew iguro-san’s favorite color! ), and she feels so sorry for being so much when her spouses are grieving, too. she’s sorry---

" i'm sorry i'm making it harder for you all! i'm sorry i'm always crying! " she hiccups, leaning into tengen's touch despite herself. her uninjured hand clutches at the material of his yukata, squeezes and squeezes as if that might make it all more bearable. " i wish i could be stronger, but i can't! "

please, don't hate her for it.

#sozokami #i also hope it's alright that i had to write tengen a little bit! #i tried to keep it to a minimum -- just what made sense to move along the response #and in general i hope it's fine i decided to post a really old meme! i just!! thought you deserved to read it uvu #there's no pressure to write a response but if you do there's absolutely no pressure to match my length either #bc i got carried away with this to say the least :' ))) #interactions | suma