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bellasprettywords · 2 days

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lolm (Spencer Reid x Reader)

a/n: I'm totaly obsessed with this song, so I just couldn't help myself and wrote this thingy.

Bear with me, it's written in like a flashback format, so the oneshot are small aspects of the relationship and there are time jumps

I forgot to mention, this is based on my queen's @taylorswift song loml

This is not proofread

y/n – your name

Warnings: Angst and some bad words. There's kind of an age difference and Spencer being a little mean at times (although I struggled making him the bad guy)

Word count: 3,034

My Masterlist

25 months ago

You first met Doctor Spencer Reid when he was teaching at the FBI Academy and you decided to audit his class, as you wanted him as your thesis advisor. Even if initially your goal was to get on his good side, you were quickly charmed by the young professor, and became a star student. Sure, you knew the rumors that surrounded the Doctor, of him being closed off to people, his loss of control and prone to violence, and overall how damaged he was from the string of tragedies that adorned his life, but even with all those warning signs, you were a little enamored of Doctor Reid. Of course, you did your best efforts to shove those feelings to the back of your mind as they seemed both unnecessary, and unrequired.

“Agent y/n, would you mind staying behind for a couple of minutes?” you heard the young Doctor called you, as you were packing your back, and your classmates left the room

“Sure Doctor Reid, how can I help you?” you said giving him a sweet smile, trying to hide the butterflies that fluttered inside your stomach

“I finally got around to read your thesis proposal, and let me tell you, it was quite impressive! Although I made some notes with comments and points I felt you could improve, as always, I’d gladly help you to find the adequate bibliography” the young Doctor said handing you the papers annotated

“Thank you so much Doctor Reid, I’m over the moon that you liked my proposal” you said feeling your stomach do a flip of excitement at the thought of the young Doctor being impressed by your work

“I’m really impressed with you and your efforts Agent y/n, and if you would like, I can put a good word for you, so you could join the BAU” Spencer said flashing a smile as he turned to his desk to gather his papers

“If you really mean it, it would be a dream come true, Doctor Reid” you said about passing out of excitement, as since you were in high school and the BAU came to your hometown to solve a case, you dreamed of being part of the team. Sure, back then you were seventeen and probably Doctor Reid didn’t even knew who you were, but from that day forward, you worked extremely hard to reach your goal.

A couple of weeks after your conversation with Doctor Reid, you received a letter from Chief Strauss herself, inviting you to join the BAU, and you couldn’t believe it. It was as if your dreams were becoming reality in front of your eyes.

When you arrived at the BAU the next morning, it felt like stepping into a tv show, surrounded by celebrities, of course, FBI celebrities. You knew none of this would be a reality if not for a certain Doctor who was now about to become your coworker; so naturally, you knew you had to do something nice to seem appreciative of his efforts.

“Good morning, Doctor Reid” you said approaching his desk with a basket of blueberry muffins in your hands, and a warm smile forming in your lips

“Good morning, Agent y/n” he said, lifting his gaze, meeting your eyes with a small, almost imperceptible, smile “How are you liking the BAU?” he added gesturing the surroundings of the bullpen

“I don’t want to seem unprofessional, but I feel like I’m walking on sunshine” you said with the biggest, dorkiest smile you could form as excitement took over your expression “I… I also brought you these… I hope you like them, it’s a simple token of appreciation” you said handing him the basket of muffins

“Thank you y/n, that is very sweet, also, you can just call me Spencer” he said taking the basket and softly brushing your hand with his, making your heart do a flip, “Come on, let me show you to your desk, and I'll introduce you to everybody” Spencer said, stepping from his chair and swiftly placing his hand on the lower part of your back. Your skin reacted to the physical contact, sending a small shiver through your spine, although you tried to act naturally. Sure, it was one thing having a crush on your Doctor Reid as your professor, but now, you were coworkers, and you knew you had to keep things professional, even if it meant shoving your feelings even deeper.

21 months ago

You’ve been at the BAU for almost three months, and while the work was amazing, your coworkers were great and overall your life felt like a dream. Although the love department was all over the place. Among the late nights working cases, and more than a couple of glances you were sure Spencer directed your way, your feelings were like a can of worms: ready to explode.

“Are you planning on staying late?” Spencer interrupted your train of thought, as you were reading through a case file

“I hope not, I just have to finish a couple of these reports and I’ll head home” you said signaling the pile of folders that rested on the edge of your desk

“Let me take half of it” he said reaching to pick some of the folders from your desk

“No no, it’s okay, it won’t take me long” you said embarrassed, realizing the two of you were the last ones to be at the bullpen

“I don’t mind helping you, besides, I’ll get through them in a jiff, that way we can both go home at a decent hour” he insisted and you could swear your heart did a cartwheel inside your chest as he was walking to his desk with more than half of your pending work. The two of you worked silently, and you couldn’t help but look up to him every couple of minutes, just to take in how handsome he was under the fluorescent lightning at the office. Sure, there was an age difference of at least eight years between the two of you, and you were sure he saw you as a child, but sometimes it’s nice to get lost in the what if.

“Would you like to get anything to eat before heading home?” Spencer said leaving the reports and the case files he took from your desk as he was already done

“I don’t think there’s anything open, it’s past midnight” you said looking at your watch

“I know this little pizza place that’s open till 2am” he replied tidying up his desk and picking up his messenger bag

“Alright, but it’s pizza and then home, because I really don’t want to be sleep deprived tomorrow” you said finishing your last report and packing your stuff. The two of you walked a little closer than you’d usually did and laughed all the way down. It was at that moment that behind the myth of mighty Doctor Spencer Reid, laid a really sweet guy, sure, you know about some disciplinary issues, but nobody’s perfect, and judging him by his action when he was grieving was kind of sucky to say the least. Conversation was going great, when in the blink of an eye, you reached the parking lot

“Come on, let’s take my car and I’ll even sweeten the deal by picking you up at your place tomorrow morning with doughnuts for breakfast” Spencer said flashing a smile that made your heart excited and unable to say no

“Alright, but I'm expecting donuts tomorrow” you said, getting into Spencer’s car.

The drive was amazing, you bought pizza, drinks and moved the party into Spencer’s apartment, where you ended up spending the night at.

17 months ago

Your relationship with Spencer was quite complicated to explain. Sure, he was your professor, and your coworker, but you were also friends who occasionally had sex, discreetly, of course.

“I may be falling in love with you” Spencer whispered into your ear, making your heart flutter, as you rolled on the bed to face him

“Good, because I may be falling for you as well, Doctor Reid” you said, kissing him softly

“I want us to be exclusive, no more fooling around, and I want us to be a couple, an official couple” Spencer added, tracing small circles into your shoulder

“So you wanna go through the whole HR process?” you asked jokingly

“Yeah, I’d like that as longs as it’s with you” he said and you chuckled at the idea of your coworkers reacting to your relationship with Spencer

13 months ago

“Guess who” you said placing your hand over Spencer’s eyes

“Mmm maybe my lovely girlfriend?” he guessed smiling and you placed a soft kiss into his cheek

“I got something for you” you said taking from your purse a couple of tickets to a cinematography festival

“I… wow, I thought these tickets were long gone, I mean, they sold out in like an hour” he said surprised and touched by the gift

“I know, say I’m the best girlfriend ever” you said grinning from ear to ear, excited with Spencer’s reaction

“I’ll do you one better: you’re the love of my life and I’m going to marry you” he said, taking your waist and placing you into his lap, and you couldn’t help but laugh at his words

9 months ago

“You’re the love of my life” Spencer said out of the blue while the two of you were finishing up a puzzle

“Excuse me?” you said, doubting the words you ears caught

“I’m pretty sure you’re the love of my life y/n” Spencer repeated in a serious tone

“You know? I never really thought people had a love of their life; but, with you it’s different, sometimes I feel like we are two pieces in a puzzle that just fit together” you rambled a little nervous, avoiding eye contact and looking for an opening to place the piece you had in your hand

“Well, I believe you are the one for me, the love of my life” Spencer affirmed once more, making you turn to hold his gaze “And that’s why I want you to marry me” Spencer said pulling a gorgeous ring from behind your ear

“What? How? What?” you said chuckling and with your heart beating fastly on your chest “Of course, I mean, wow, of course I’d marry you Spencer” you said placing a kiss into your boyfriend’s, excuse me, your fiance’s lips “I can’t believe you asked me to marry you with a magic trick” you said laughing and continuing kissing Spencer

“I love you y/n, I love you with all my heart” Spencer muttered in between kisses, and you couldn’t believe it, you really felt like living in a dream, a dream you’d never wanted to wake up

“And now you’ll have to love me forever” you said putting on the ring Spencer gave you, and contemplating a life with him for the rest of your life, and honestly, it was looking pretty amazing

“Oh, I’m aware of that, I’ll never leave you, and I’ll never stop loving you” Spencer promised, peppering kissed all over your face and neck

7 months ago

“Imagine waking up to the sound of pur kids running around the apartment” Spencer whispered into your ear and placed a soft kiss in the top of your head

“That’s quite a thought” you reapplied, opening your eyes and rolling over your bed to be laying down facing your fiance

“It would be nice, imagine, having an adorable bundle of joy, our little bundle of joy” he added and you could almost picture it: the cute family, sunday bbqs, maybe even a dog to wrap up the perfect family image

“We are not even married yet, and you’re already thinking about kids” you said placing a soft kiss in Spencer’s lips

“Well, you got a point, but neither of us are religious, so I don’t think the order even matters” Spencer said making you chuckle “I love your laugh, sometimes I swear it’s my favorite sound in the world” Spencer added, placing soft kisses in your neck, making you laugh even more at the contact of his beard with your sensitive skin

“Good, because you’re gonna be stuck with me and my laugh for the rest of your life” you said softly scratching Spencer’s curls as he kept placing kisses all over your body

“I can’t wait for the rest of our lives to begin, I already told you, you’re the love of my life” Spencer said placing you under him and leaving a trail of kisses from your neck to your chest

3 months ago

“Just shut the hell up” Spencer said from the other side of the table

“I… I… “ you muttered, completely out of words

“Sometimes I swear I can’t stand you” he said placing his hands in the temple of his head

“I just didn’t want your phone to go to voicemail” you said feeling smaller by the second, and deeply regretting picking up Spencer’s phone when you saw the name Diana Reid lighting up the screen

“Why would you tell her about the engagement?” he asked rising his tone

“I thought she already knew” you whispered with your heart breaking, and standing up from the dining table

“I’m sorry y/n, I just… I get really sensitive about my mom” Spencer said as you were leaving, but you didn’t dare to look at him, and then you heard him say “You’re the love of my life, you know it”

A week ago

“I don’t want to marry you anymore” Spencer muttered under his breath

“I don’t know what kid of game or prank you’re trying to pull right now, but this is not funny Spencer, it’s straight up mean” you said a with a serious tone

“I’m not joking y/n, I… I’ve been thinking about this, long and hard for quite a while now, and I don’t want to marry you anymore” Spencer repeated with somber eyes

“You’ve been thinking about this for a while?” you asked, unable to believe the words that were coming out of the love of your life’s mouth

“Yeah, I didn't want to tell you right away, until I was certain, so this is me, telling you” Spencer said with a tone that was so calm, it almost scared you

“Get out of my apartment” you said with a string of voice as tears filled up your eyes

“Come on y/n, we’re sharing a lease” Spencer said, offended that you even suggested that he had to leave

“Excuse me? You think you can come here, break my heart and just be my roommate? There’s no way in hell that’s happening” you said, getting angered by the second “Take your things and leave, now! I’m buying you out of the lease” you said, raising your voice, as you could feel both your heart and your world crumbling

“I can’t take all my things tonight!” Spencer started yelling as well, stating the obvious

“Well take whatever you can! But you’re not staying in this apartment a minute longer!” you said, leaving Spencer in the living room as you locked yourself up in the bathroom. You were a mess, but you were doing your best to contain the tears, so he didn’t hear you cry. You stayed there, sitting on the bathroom floor for who know how long, until you heard the entrance door shut down, and you knew it: he was finally gone

Today

You still walked around with a hole where your heart was supposed to be, or at least that's how you felt. The numb feeling had taken over your whole body, and like it or no, you spent the last five days rotting in bed, and crying over how abruptly things ended with Spencer. You felt the need to overanalyze every single interaction between the two of you to see where did things got so messed up, and the words I’ve been thinking about this, long and hard for quite a while now, and I don’t want to marry you anymore still lingered in your head, making it impossible to move on. It was like Spencer showed you special colors, and now you weren’t able to see them, somehow, the world seemed to lose its glow. All the happiness you once felt, now seemed really far away, trapped by a braid of lies and false interactions.

You had an unread email from the FBI’s department of Human Resources, and you knew exactly what it was: your transfer to the office in San Francisco. Sure, you did make a fuss about the apartment, making Spencer leave and everything, but there’s no proper way to react when your boyfriend is breaking off your engagement. You finally decided to open it, when you heard a knock on the door and you knew exactly who it was

“You can just open the damn door, you have a key” you told Spencer, opening the door and avoiding eye contact

“It seemed improper” he said stepping into the apartment that once upon a time was your home

“Whatever” you said, marching into the kitchen and pretending to look for something in the fridge

“I heard about your transfer” Spencer said, trying but failing to do small talk

“I bet you did” you said, this time looking for something in the pantry

“I am sorry, about all this, I wish I could take it back y/n” Spencer said, this time with a pleading voice

“What do you want me to say Spencer? You turned out to be the loss of my life” you added with venom in your voice

“I understand, goodbye, I hope you have a great time in San Francisco” were the last words Spencer muttered as he left the apartment.

You couldn’t stop thinking about the last words Spencer gifted you: I understand, goodbye, I hope you have a great time in San Francisco but you figured they were words worthy of the way your relationship crashed and burned. It was disheartening to think about all the promises, the plans for the future and the dreams you two shared, but deep down you knew it was time to move on, even if it shattered your heart

“What a bland goodbye” you muttered under your breath as you started packing for your new life

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid drabble #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfiction #dr spencer reid

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strawberry-daiquiris · 3 days

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i just need you to know that all of these ~water adventure oscar~ photos have me thirsting for a salt skin part 2. maybe he and lando decide to take to the sea ? i don’t know. i’m just spit balling. and this is ZERO pressure! i just wanted you to know im thinking of you and your boys! (plus my fave photo from the set!!)

this photo was intense immediate salt skin vibes for me! the concerned look on his face, the clutching hand on the towel, the person captivating him off camera.

i haven't done much meta around them because that fic still feels a bit sacred - i wrote it all in one sitting, more or less, and felt a bit like i'd been drowned in the ocean/dehydrated on a rock when i finally stood up off the sofa.

i've always thought that afterwards, lando would become oscar's very curious, slightly violent wag, flitting all ethereal around the paddock charming people then threatening to rip their throats out if they so much as hinted a threat at oscar. everyone would know there was something weird about him, they could just never really guess what. except for maybe zak brown lol still don't ask me what i was getting at with that weird hint of a side plot.

anyway here's a little 900 word snapshot of their morning before this picture would have been taken in the saltskin universe!

tw for them being bloodthirsty sirens and also displaying slightly coercive behaviour!!!

_________________________

“Are you going to put SPF on?”

Oscar hangs back against the bathroom door, rubbing a stubborn patch of lotion into the dry skin at the side of his nose. On the floor, Lando is rooting under the bed for something, his naked arse pointing Oscar’s direction. It still gets him, even now, how weirdly Lando moves his human body, whipping around slightly too fast, fixing Oscar with a stare that’s a little ethereal.

“I’m a merman, Oscar. I don’t need frickin’ SPF.”

”Were.” Oscar emphasises with his hands, chucking the tube onto the floor next to Lando. He flinches from it like Oscar’s thrown a grenade, or a fishing line. “You were a merman, and now you’re not, so…”

He points out the window to the baking hot sun. It’s a free weekend in Monaco, time to take the boat out into the furthest reaches of the bay so Lando can dive under the water for longer than it should be possible to hold his breath.

“SPF.”

Lando grimaces, poking at the tube with his foot, trying to roll it under the bed to its final resting place next to whatever he’d been looking for. He treats the underneath of the bed like a cave, hoarding things there. It’s fine, and Oscar doesn’t mind, until it’s something important, like his passport, or the car keys.

”Lando, don’t make me do it.”

Oscar turns back to the bathroom mirror, sighing when he realises he’s still got a glob of white on his nose. He pauses, listening for the squelch of cream on soft skin, but it doesn’t come.

”Lando,” he starts, and he hears a groan as his voice curls out of the bathroom, tantalisingly soft as it creeps away from him. Oscar has learnt how to control it, how to target the power towards a person, or an object. It’s not the only reason there’s trophies on his shelves and a different coloured team wear in his wardrobe, but it’s one of the biggest. “Put on the sunscreen.”

He hears the cap pop, the heavy weight of Lando’s footsteps as he comes closer, standing naked in the doorway squirting it on his chest. It’d be hot, if it weren’t for the scowl.

”I hate you,” Lando spits, tongue more pointed than usual, the tops of his ears going red like they want to spike, fighting the siren rage.

Maybe it’s hot because of the scowl.

Oscar only smiles, wrapping an arm around his stomach and holding him against the door frame, fingers working some of the cream into the scarred skin that used to be gills, shiny silvery purple like stretch marks. When he comes to a stop, he looks at his hand, pale against the tan of Lando’s skin. Ever since he came out of the ocean, he’s had webbing at the base of his fingers. Not enough to be noticeable unless you really look. Take it in alongside his slightly lighter eyes, and his sharper fingernails. Surface changes to the eye, but rooted far deeper than that, somewhere in Oscar’s DNA.

”No, you don’t,” Oscar whispers, and he doesn’t need to use his powers for this, needs nothing more than the press of his lips against the side of Lando’s face, where he’s finally starting to grow something that looks like facial hair. “You love me.”

Lando squirms, but Oscar has the upper hand. More strength in his thighs, more defined muscles in his chest. He’s not fighting a monster now. He is one.

”Don’t.”

Oscar smiles, twisting Lando so their faces are pressed so close he can smell the salt on Lando’s breath. Strong like he’s been swilling sea water, even after he’s brushed his teeth.

”You do, you love me,” Oscar insists, and Lando shakes his head. Oscar rests his fingers along Lando’s scars again, scraping the pointy bits of his nails along the soft, new skin until Lando shivers, whimpering, pleading. Tame. “You wished for me.”

Lando grabs Oscar’s arm, wraps his strong, long fingers around his wrist and tugs, heaving breaths like he’s just gulped down a lungful of water.

“You did,” Oscar insists, the hand Lando didn’t grab scratching deeper, until the scars start to pinken. It turns Lando on, every time, still sensitive with an erogenous zone unique only to him. “Say it.”

”I wished for you,” Lando blurts, and Oscar lets go, stepping back out of his space triumphantly. Still, Lando reaches for him, sliding his hands under Oscar’s t-shirt, feeling the muscles, pulling him close. His voice is softer, when he speaks again, more like the boy who dazzled him in the water, tempted him close to death. “You know I wished for you.”

Oscar kisses Lando’s forehead, holds him as he rests against his chest, so much skin on display, so much vulnerability. He can tell the moment it takes them both, remembering how lonely they were, how much they loathed the absence of this, even when they didn’t know what this was.

“I know,” Oscar whispers, letting his hand fall to the curve of Lando’s waist, and the small ridge where his tail used to start, the one you can feel if you know where to touch. Eczema, Oscar has taught Lando to claim, if anyone asks why his skin looks like the surface of a rock, weathered by a storm. “I know.”

They stay that way until the SPF starts to dry, tacky, on Lando’s skin and Oscar has to push him away before they’re bound by more than just the sea.

”Put some clothes on, Lando,” Oscar says, brushing past him to leave for the kitchen, pack a cool box with raw meat they don’t eat anywhere but home, the boat and any restaurant with carpaccio on the menu. “The boat’s not going to sail itself.”

#GOD I LOVE THE BLOODTHIRSTY LITTLE MONSTERS!!!!#Both changed in different ways #Weirdly nervous about this because that fic sometimes feels like it was written by someone Not Me lmao #my fic #salt skin #landoscar #strawberry.ask

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jq37 · 20 hours

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So, that lady FH episode was amazing and all, but...

Hoo boy, I already see the discourse around the Ratgrinders' fates forming and it is going to be painful. Be careful around the fandom space.

(I mean, resurrection is still on the table for them, but that's based on if the players feel like it and right now, we're looking at 50/50 odds at bests)

Yeah, don't worry about me. This isn't my first rodeo and also I post a lot about D20 and respond to asks I get but I don't actually personally engage with any of The Discourse (tm).

And I'm not really surprised at the reaction. I know people have been opinionated all season in two main camps (that have a lot of overlap): people dissatisfied with the narrative direction and people deeply sympathetic to the Rat Grinders to the point of being mad at the Bad Kids.

The first camp I mostly understand. I get wishing the cast would explore a certain storyline more. For example, I've been on the Aelwyn redemption arc train since literally the first episode of Fantasy High so I was a little disappointed that when that finally came to a head in Freshman Year, it was a big fight and then very little aftermath/unpacking because Aelwyn was sent to jail right after. And Sophomore Year hadn't been announced so I had no idea that she was gonna get another shot. But I wasn't upset or anything. Adaine at that point still hated her sister. She had no reason to want to reach out. And at the end of the day this is other people playing a game. Brennan presented them all the possible plot threads and they were most interested in self discovery, hanging out with each other, doing Shenanigans, and playing Tomb Raider re: Ankarna. Those are all options they were presented and it's not like they were doing crazy off-roading. It's well within the parameters of what D&D is. If you're gonna watch a show like this (or honestly any show), you have to accept that what's most interesting to you isn't always going to be the most interesting thing to the people in the driver's seat.

So yeah, I feel like this side of things I get (even though I'm fine with how things turned out).

The other camp--people being legit mad at the Bad Kids (and in some cases the actual cast) for treating the Rat Grinders like antagonists instead of victims that they were responsible for empathizing with and redeeming--I find kind of wild.

Like…you're mad at the kids who go to Child Murder School for killing kids who want to end the world and kill them specifically? Literally the first day of school the principal of the school says that adventurers are violent wanderers who engage in shenanigans and enact violence. This is the exact assignment they were given and that's what they're doing.

I think it's wild to at the same time believe that the Rat Grinders (who have killed people) are not responsible for their actions and deserve to be talked down while in the process of causing an apocalypse because they're just kids who were manipulated while at the same time calling the Bad Kids evil lunatics for trying to stop them by killing them (in a world where Revivify and Resurrection exist) even though they are ALSO kids who are doing what they've learned at Child Murder School. The Bad Kids have to be mature enough to thoroughly investigate the situation and have nuance about it but the Rat Grinders don't have any responsibility to not join a shady evil murder plan*? And do the Bad Kids really hate the Rat Grinders to the point where they're doing some overkill in this fight? Absolutely. But it's not like they're killing them because they hate them. They're killing them because they're trying to end the world--and they also happen to hate them. Are we forgetting that Kipperlilly killed Buddy--her own teammate--with a gleeful smile on her face? That was so out of pocket.

They're adventurers! Not guidance counselors! If Jawbone was like, "We need to kill these kids," yeah that would be weird but why would the Bad Kids extend an olive branch to the kids who (1) famously hate them, (2) killed at least one maybe 2 of their own party members, (3) endangered the entire student body population an hour ago, (4) are currently trying to end the world. Hell, Adaine was ready to be mean to her own sister in elf jail literally up until the point Brennan described how rough she looked from the torture and that's when she changed her mind. The Power of Love and Empathy is on the menu but it's a special item you only can get if you know the chef. Everyone else is getting a serving of These Hands. Just because you can find a vegan solution to a problem it doesn't mean you're obligated to.

This all comes down to, "Maybe teenagers shouldn't have godlike powers and the ability to play judge, jury, and executioner" but that's literally the premise of the entire show so you can't get around it without rejecting the show's entire premise. If they were like, "Hmm the systems that underpin our world are questionable and we should change the power structures" instead of, "Let's kill some bad guys!" then that's a totally different thing we're doing here!

And, idk man, this show has always had a Who Framed Roger Rabbit style morality where the normal rules of ethics stop applying when it's funny. They beat the crud out of Ragh and then lied to him that he shit his pants just for the bit. A pirate was rude/kinda racist to Riz so they scared him into killing himself. Riz ate the remains of the sentient (albiet evil) dragon he killed. That's all unhinged behavior but none of that is meant to be serious. Getting upset about Fig sending Ruben to hell to me feels like getting mad that Jerry hit Tom with a cartoonishly large mallet.

None of this is new so I have to assume that people are having a big reaction because they relate to the Rat Grinders or just really like them so it feels bad that the Bad Kids are treating them like fodder rather than beloved NPCs.

But again, this is a world where you can bring people back from the dead and the Rat Grinders have showed intent that is grievously neglectful at best and insanely murderous at worst so I can't muster a lot of sympathy for the fact that the Bad Kids are just taking them down without remorse. I don't think you have to try to empathize with the people who are trying to harm you if you don't want to especially while they are in the process of harming you.

(*And we still don't know how voluntarily they joined this plan. We don't know if they were killed and basically forced into resurrecting with rage or if they just leapt at the chance to join a plan that would let them get one over on their rivals. It literally could be either. We've had kid villains on this show strong armed into being party to evil plans by threat of harm (Aelwyn) as well was kid villains who just had their own selfish motivations and weren't tricked at all (Penelope and Biz). We actually don't have any clear answer on how culpable they are. We don't know if they all have rage crystals (except for Buddy). And we don't know how much having a Rage Crystal effects your actions. The best indicator we got is in this latest ep when Brennan said that there was a mechanic where Porter was going to call anyone with a rage crystal to fight for him but that says to me that he's only directly puppeting them when he uses that action and otherwise they have free will and are just angrier. The Bad Kids don't have a reason to believe definitively that the Rat Grinders are just unwilling puppets even if that is the case so of course they're treating them like enemies. Anyway, this is a whole lot of "I don't knows" but that's only because I've seen a lot of people talking like the Rat Grinders literally aren't in control of their actions but that's not info that we have. It could be true but we don't actually know that so it's not a good argument.)

#asks #dimension 20 #fantasy high #spoilers #dimension 20 spoilers #fantasy high spoilers #brwolf1995 #i've seen ppl say that the bad kids were mean the the RG's for no reason and it's like.#...the reason is that this is a show based on high school pop culture tropes #and they immediately and correctly clocked that KP is tracy flick #like come on man #and there's no reason to believe they can't be rezzed once this is taken care of #idk why ppl are acting like they're dead-dead #ankarna could just raise them like cass raised K at the end of SY if brennan wants #also lmao emily was brutal to ruben but I think that was mostly just irl person emily being like I put all this effort into you #and I never learned anything useful???? then perish #it's not that deep #one of my friends was like 'babe this isn't steven universe'#and I think about that a lot

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casurlaub · 2 days

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Why Wolfstar makes sense canonically

Call me delusional but welcome to my TED talk

Most of this has been said repeatedly by others over the years. I don't mean to steal anybody's credit, so if you feel like I have, please reach out.

This is me 'defending' Wolfstar, I'm not hating on another ship here and I won't engage in a discussion about which ship makes more sense. I'm just trying to elaborate why I can 'see' Wolfstar - even from a canon perspective.

I'm trying (and hoping to succeed) to be respectful and I'm not attacking a specific person here. This is just a general post with all my thoughts on the matter and all the arguments I've heard against it.

Brace yourself because this is going to get really really long, and there'll be a lot of quotes from the original source material.

The original source material

I feel that many people who claim the ship doesn't make sense fail to see that we're in this fandom because it did make sense to us after reading the books. The fandom exists, because many people saw it. Because it's possible to see it. It's not the other way around.

The thing with Wolfstar is, that it's all in the 'show not tell' which I suppose makes it 'easy' to overlook. Obviously it is, with the author not intending the ship - I'm not saying wolfstar is canon, but it makes a lot of sense with what we have in canon.

Their nonverbal communication

They have a lot of nonverbal communication going on, which shows a great level of understanding for one another. But they're not only able to read one another, they're actively (and both of them) communicating via eye contact - a lot. They're searching for the other person's eyes and are passing along 'thoughts', are reaching silent understandings just like that. That hints at a great emotional connection.

Let's do that 'chronologically':

It doesn't take more than a single look from Sirius to convince Remus that he is innocent. At this point Remus doesn't know shit about what really happened. He admits so himself later on, he keeps asking Sirius questions later on. And yet again he's so ready to believe Sirius,

Professor Lupin came hurtling into the room, his face bloodless, his wand raised an ready. His eyes flickered over Ron, lying on the floor, over Hermione, cowering next to the door, to Harry, standing there with his wand covering Black, and then to Black himself, crumpled and bleeding at Harry's feet. 'Expelliarmus!' Lupin shouted. [...] Lupin caught them all defty then moved into the room, staring at Black, who still had Crookshanks lying protectively across his chest. [...] Then Lupin spoke, in an odd voice, a voice that shook with some suppressed emotion. 'Where is he, Sirius?' [...] Black's face was quite expressionless. For a few seconds, he didn't move at all. Then, very slowly, he raised his empty hand, and pointed straight at Ron. 'But then… Lupin muttered, staring at Black so intently it seemed he was trying to read his mind. “'Why hasn’t he shown himself before now? Unless...-' Lupin's eyes suddenly widened, as though he was seeing something beyond Black, something none of the rest could see, '-unless he was the one… unless you switched… without telling me?' Very slowly, his sunken gaze never leaving Lupin’s face, Black nodded. [...] Lupin lowered his wand. Next moment, he had walked to Black's side, seized his hand, pulled hm to his feet so that Crookshanks fell to the floor, and embraced Black like a brother.

And then he says, still without having received any explanation, just like that,

'I haven't been Sirius' friend for twelve years, but I am now... let me explain...'

They are so in synch with their actions without even having to talk about it; they're forming a united front (I'm getting to that later on), they're again reaching a silent understanding just by looking at one another (again),

Both Black and Lupin strode forwards, seized Pettigrew's shoulders and threw him backwards onto the floor. [...] Black and Lupin stood shoulder to shoulder, wands raised. [...] Black and Lupin both looked staggered. [...] Black and Lupin were looking at each other. Then, with one movement, they lowered their wands.

I think it's also important to note that they do not just look, but look to check for each other's opinion on the matter. Harry asks them not to murder Peter and of course they listen to him, but they first look at each other as if checking to be on the same page. So - they've just reunited after over twelve years and immediately take the other person into consideration (I'm getting to that later on).

Then in OotP there's the famous fourty line stare where Remus is just intently staring at Sirius while he and Molly are arguing, as opposed to the others who are watching the conversation (who does that?),

'Lupin, who had been about to take a sip of whine, lowered his goblet slowly, looking wary' [...] Lupin's eyes were fixed on Sirius. [fourty lines of back and forth between Molly and Sirius] 'Personally,' said Lupin quietly, looking away from Sirius at last.

And it's not just Remus doing it. It's mutual. They act like a unit (again, getting to that). They care for each other's opinion and they do know each other so well that a single fleeting look is enough for them to check in with the other,

He [Harry] thought he saw Sirius and Lupin exchange the most fleeting of looks before Sirius answered [...]

And again when Harry contacts them via floo to discuss Snape's Worst Memory, they do it again,

They exchanged a look of great surprise [...] Lupin glanced sideways at Sirius, then said, [...]

They communicate via touch, too:

Black's wand arm rose, but Lupin seized him around the wrist, gave him a warning look, then turned again to Pettigrew, his voice light and casual [...]

So - Remus does not only convince headstrong Sirius to back down nonverbally just by looking and touching him, no I think it's also important to note that Remus, who isn't a 'touch person' (he's awkward when comforting Molly, he (as far as I recall) never hugs Harry, always just shakes hands), doesn't even seem to think twice about touching Sirius. No, he immediately pulls him into a hug, then is restraining him physically when he tries to launch at Scabbers, then continues to communicate via looks and touch. After twelve years of separation he's immediately comfortable enough to initiate it.

They're super in synch - also with how they say things

It carries through the whole of OotP, really. Sirius says something just for Remus to say something immediately afterwards or the other way around. When they're together in a scene, the vibe is always them carrying the conversation together, one adding to the other's thoughts.

It already starts in PoA,

'They didn't say what they thought they saw !' said Black savagely [...]. 'Everyone thought Sirius killed Peter,', said Lupin nodding.

But in OotP it's taken to whole new levels. It's too much to put here, but in that conversation where they tell Harry about the Order it's basically:

said Sirius / said Lupin /said Sirius /said Lupin... throughout the whole scene. One of them says something and the other one adds. And again. And again. And again.

And it happens again (though not to that extent) before Harry's Ministry hearing. In the Boggart scene. And then again when they discuss 'Snape's Worst Memory'.

They're also portrayed as being close to one another (distance-wise) repeatedly throughout OotP.

Like when Remus is there chances are Sirius isn't far. That doesn't have to mean anything of course but the frequency puts out a certain vibe to me,

'I said - shut - UP!', roared the man [Sirius] and with a stupendous effort he and Lupin managed to force the curtains closed again

Honestly, I think it's kind of funny that even when there're a number of people the two of them are always mentioned right after one another. Before Harry's ministry hearing, at Ron and Hermione's party, when Mrs Weasley is battling the Boggart, in the Department of Mysteries,

He pushed it open and saw Mr and Mrs Weasley, Sirius, Lupin and Tonks sitting at [...] Sirius, Lupin, Tonks and Kingsley Shacklebolt were already there Lupin had come running into the room, closely followed by Sirius [...] [...] and five more people sprinted into the room: Sirius, Lupin, Moody, Tonks and Kingsley.

And then when Harry floos to see Sirius after he has seen 'Snape's Worst Memory' Remus is there again-, casually sitting at the table and reading and Harry mistakes him for Sirius even (because he's looking so at home?). But Remus immediately knows where to fetch Sirius and comes back with him quickly after. That just has such a domestic vibe to me.

[...] long wooden table where a man sat poring over a piece of parchment. [...] 'Sirius'? [...] It was not Sirius, it was Lupin. [...] 'I'll call him,' said Lupin. [...] And Harry saw Lupin hurry out of the kitchen. [...] Lupin returned with Sirius at his heels moments after.

Remus and his relationship to his friends

Remus mentions Sirius first when he speaks about his friends, although in every other occasion it's always James who's mentioned first. He always says 'James and Sirius'/'your father and Sirius'; it's always James first, Sirius second, but when he's talking about him finding friends for the first time in his life, it's suddenly Sirius first,

'I had friends, three great friend. Sirius Black... Peter Pettigrew... and, of course, your father, Harry - James Potter.'

I don't think that necessarily means anything though, but I felt like adding it just for the sake of it... (I know the author stated James supported Remus after Hogwarts, not Sirius, implying they were (always) closer, but - and that's just my general personal approach - I don't care much for what she said in any Interviews/on pottermore/wizardingworld.com or whatever. She's contradicting herself so often there (see below). To me it's always books first and the books show that Remus and Sirius are close as adults whereas we don't have much information about Remus/James).

Then Remus is very obviously operating on double standards when it comes to Sirius as opposed to Peter. In his conversation with Harry it's insinuated that he doesn't want Sirius, who he believes to have betrayed Lily and James and killed Peter and twelve others, to receive the Dementor's kiss.

'He deserves it,' he [Harry] said suddenly. 'You think so?' said Lupin lightly. 'Do you really think anyone deserves that?

Yet later when he learns the truth he has no qualms whatsoever about killing Peter. He doesn't stop Sirius, he doesn't hesitate, he's joinng in. Why's this so different suddenly? Selling away your friends lives and framing your other friend (Peter) isn't worse than selling away your friends' lives and killing your other friend (allegedly Sirius), is it? So if their 'alleged' crimes are comparable, why is Remus acting different about Peter's than he is about Sirius's?

'Shall we kill him together?' 'Yes, I think s,' said Lupin grimly.

It's not about him thinking the Dementor's kiss was worse than death either. Because he as no qualms to bring Peter to the Dementors when Harry stops them from murdering him. So... why the double standards again?

Sirius/Remus also so do 'relationship behaviour'. I mean the whole nonverbal communication already, but also,

'Sirius, sit down.' [...] Sirius sank slowly back into his chair, his face white.

'[...] I think Molly's right, Sirius. We've said enough.' Sirius half-shrugged, but did not argue. 'I'm coming up there to have a word with Snape!' said Sirius forcefully, and he actually made to stand up, but Lupin wrenched him back down again. 'If anyone's going to tell Snape it will be me!' he said firmly

Remus understands Sirius and is looking out for him

Remus gets Sirius even after over twelve years of being separated. Sirius is impatient in PoA, because he - finally - wants to take revenge on Peter. Remus not only sees that but tries to stop him. To me it reads as if he knows that Harry's opinion is important to Sirius, will be, once he sees clearly again and that he doesn't want him to destroy his chances with Harry by acting too impulsive. Because his intervention isn't rooted in his concern for Peter's life obviously, because he's ready to kill Peter once they explained everything,

'Sirius, NO!, Lupin yelled, launching himself forwards and dragging Black away from Ron again. “WAIT! You can’t do it just like that - they need to understand - we’ve got to explain -“ 'We can explain afterwards!,' snarled Black, trying to throw Lupin off, one hand still clawing the air as the tried to reach Scabbers, who was squealing like a piglet, scratching Ron’s face and neck as he tried to escape. 'They’ve - got - a - right - to - know - everything!,' Lupin panted, still trying to restrain Black. 'Ron’s kept him as a pet! There are parts of it even I don’t understand! And Harry - you owe Harry the truth'

And then again he's stepping in when Sirius is not doing himself any favor with Harry (again),

'And why did he fake this death?' he [Harry] said furiously. 'Because he knew you were about to kill him like you killed my parents.' 'No', said Lupin. 'Harry-' 'And now you've come to finish him off!' 'Yes, I have,' said Black, with an evil look at Scabbers. 'Then I should've let Snape take you!' Harry shouted. 'Harry,', said Lupin hurriedly, 'don't you see? All this time we've thought Sirius betrayed your parents, and Peter tracked him down - but it was the other way around, don't you see? Peter betrayed your mother and father - Sirius tracked Peter down-'

And then Remus is stepping in - again - when it's getting too much for Sirius,

'Harry... I as good as killed them', he [Sirius] croaked. 'I persuaded Lily and James to change to Peter at the last moment [...] I was scared. I set out for your parents' house straight away. And when I saw their house, destroyed and their bodies - I realized what Peter must'v done. What I'd done.' His voice broke. He turned away 'Enough of this,' said Lupin, and there was a steely note in his voice Harry had never heard before.

And in this scene in OotP he's also looking out for him,

'I'm coming up there to have a word with Snape!' said Sirius forcefully, and he actually made to stand up, but Lupin wrenched him back down again. 'If anyone's going to tell Snape it will be me!' he said firmly

They're forming a united front - not once, but it's a recurring motive.

Both are ready to handle the whole Peter thing together. They haven't seen each other for over twelve years, they didn't part on good terms and still they're immediately including the other. Even Sirius who's (in this situation) either failing to see how his behavior isn't doing him any good with building a relationshio with Harry or is incapable of stopping himself, is including Remus,

'Ready, Sirius' said Lupin [...] 'Together?' he [Sirius] said quietly. ‘I think so', said Lupin [...]

And then again, they're ready to kill him together, too,

'Of course,' said Black, and the ghost of a grin flitted across his gaunt face. He, too, began rolling up his sleeves. 'Shall we kill him together?' 'Yes, I think so,' said Lupin grimly.

And also non-verbally they're an united front (see above),

Then they're portrayed as 'shoulder to shoulder' (figuratively speaking) in other situations as well. Remus is taking Sirius's side in the argument with Molly although he has no business doing so, although he usually prefers to stay in the background. He's usually keeping quiet, usually not speaking up - Molly even thinks she's getting an ally when he joins the conversation,

'Personally,' said Lupin quietly, looking away from Sirius at last, as Mrs Weasley turned quickly to him, hopeful that finally she was about to get an ally. 'I think it better that Harry gets the facts - not all the facts, Molly, but the general picture - from us, rather than a garbled version from ... others.' [...] 'Molly you're not the only person at this table who cares about Harry', said Lupin sharply.

Remus is always taking Sirius's Side - he keeps making excuses for James and Sirius's behavior at Hogwarts, he keeps playing it down - even as an adult. He's damn biased, he doesn't move an inch - as long as they're in public at least,

'Sirius thought it would be - er - amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree-trunk with a long stick and he’d be able to get in after me.'

'a schoolboy grudge' [Remus to Snape]

Lupin looked sideways at Sirius, then aid, 'Look, Harry, what you've got to understand is that your father and Sirius were the best in the school at whatever they did - everyone thought they were the height of cool - if they sometimes got a bit carried away-' 'If we were sometimes arrogant little berks, you mean',, said Sirius. Lupin smiled.

And I think it's important to point out that Remus does this even though it's not his real stance on the matter,

'[...] it would be - er - amusing, to tell Snape [...]' 'We were in the same year, you know and we - er - didn’t like each other very much. He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James’s talent on the Quidditch pitch…'

The 'er' and 'I think' is a speech pattern of his that indicates he's not being completely honest/doesn't truly believe what he says. ('So he - er - accidentally let slip that I am a werewolf this morning at breakfast.' / 'Er - perhaps it will be best if we don’t revive him until we’re safely back in the castle.). He doesn't truly think they were as harmless as he's portraying it ('Did I ever have the guts to tell you I thought you were ought of order?').

So - united front on the outside, no matter what. But it's insinuated that behind closed doors Remus is taking a different stance. He's blaming himself for not stepping in with the whole Snape thing, because that's just who he is - blaming himself for everything (sometimes rightfully so, sometimes not) While I do think he didn't say anything outwardly, there must have been something that made it clear to the others that Remus didn't approve of their behavior,

'Of course he was a bit of an idiot,' said Sirius bracingly, 'we were all idiots! Well - Moony not so much', he said fairly, looking at Lupin. But Remus shook his head. 'Did I ever tell you to lay off Snape?”' he said. 'Did I ever have the guts to tell you I thought you were out of order?' 'Yeah, well', said Sirius, 'you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

Remus is suddenly living at Grimmauldplace

So at the end of GoF Remus obviously has his own place (or is living with his father again, although he didn't want to because he didn't want to disturb his quiet life according to the author? But then again I don't care what she said on Pottermore).

'Sirius, I need you to set off at once. You are to alert Remus Lupin, Arabella Figg, Mundungus Fletcher —the old crowd. Lie low at Lupin's for a while, I will contact you there.'

So that's at the end of June. And then at the beginning of August when Harry arrives in London, just six weeks later, he's living at Grimmauldplace already,

Lupin, who was staying at the house with Sirius but who left it for long periods to do mysterious work for the Order [...]

And then rhey give away joint Christmas presents,

Sirius and Lupin had given Harry a set of excellent books entitled Practical Defensive Magic and its Use Against the Dark Arts, which had superb, moving colour illustrations of all the counter-jinxes and hexes it described.

They act differently with / because of one another

Sometimes they even defy their core character traits.

Remus's primal drive in everything he does is to be liked/fit in/be seen as good by others (and not as the monster he sees himself as deep down). He's even sometimes manipulative and hypocritical because of it. For example he doesn't tell Dumbledore about Sirius's animagus form because of it (or at least it's part of the reason, or he believes it to be). But when Snape enters the Shrieking Shack he doesn't care about himself getting into trouble for - allegedly - helping a supposed mass murderer break into the castle and everything. Even though he stated before that he didn't tell Dumbledore about Sirius for fear of losing his respect, all he cares about suddenly is Sirius's safety:

'Severus, you're making a mistake,' said Lupin urgently. 'You haven't heard everything - I can explain - Sirius is not here to kill Harry-' [...] 'You fool,' said Lupin softly. 'Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban.'

Also Remus is able to get through to Sirius even in a state of utmost agitation. Sirius is trying to murder Peter and Remus stops him and Sirius listens, even though his goal is finally in reach. Although, up to that point, he didn't exactly act very sensible (slashing the Fat Lady, breaking into Harry's dorm with a knife),

'All right then,' Black said, without taking his eyes off the rat. “Tell them whatever you like. But make it quick, Remus. I want to commit the murder I was imprisoned for…'

And he continues to listen to Remus, Remus continues to be able to get through to him even when he's getting emotional. And Remus, who's always trying to appear mild (for fear of being perceived as aggressive which he can not afford because of the werewolf-thing), who even spoke quietly before in that very same conversation, is losing parts of his composure when Sirius is attacked,

“Molly, you’re not the only person at this table who cares about Harry”, said Lupin sharply. “Sirius, sit down.” Molly’s lower lip was trembling. Sirius sank slowly back into his chair, his face white.

Remus is letting loose around him (and the other marauders). He quips,

'Did you like question ten, Moony?' asked Sirius as they emerged to the Entrance Hall. 'Loved it,' said Lupin briskly. 'Give five signs that identify the werewolf. Excellent question.' 'D’you think you managed to get all the signs?,' said James in tones of mock concern. 'Think I did,' said Lupin seriously, as they joined the crowd thronging around the front doors eager to get out into the sunlit grounds. 'One: he’s sitting on my chair. Two: he’s wearing my clothes. Three: his name’s Remus Lupin.'

'Well, as everyone thinks I’m a mad mass-murderer and the Ministry’s put a ten thousand Galleon price on my head, I can hardly stroll up the street and start handing out leaflets, can I?,' said Sirius restlessly. 'And I’m not a very popular dinner guest with most of the community,' said Lupin. “It’s an occupational hazard of being a werewolf.'

[As @remusawoooo put it: let's form a comedy duo <3]

And Remus is obviously very comfortable with Sirius. He's always restraining himself, Harry narrates his way of speaking as 'mild' or 'quiet' so many times, but apparently he's different when he's alone with Sirius. That hints at a great level of trust. He doesn't bother to keep up his act around him, because he doesn't worry about being perceived as mild with him and just speaks his truth ( e.g. about Umbridge). He can just be and oh boy, thinking about Remus's character that has to be the greatest fucking deal ever.

'I know she's a nasty piece of work, though - you should hear Remus talk about her.'

And then Remus, who is so good at appearing restrained, is losing his composure when Sirius dies,

'He can’t come back, Harry,' said Lupin, his voice breaking as he struggled to contain Harry. 'He can’t come back, because he’s d-' [...] Lupin's face was pale. [...] Lupin turned away from the archway as he spoke. It sounded as if every word were causing him pain.

In this moment Harry himself is in huge (emotional) pain, but he still notices - must've been rather obvious, then?

Their mutual respect for one another

So, I've read how Sirius wouldn't/couldn't possibly respect Remus / see him as an equal. How they wouldn't fully 'trust' one another. No matter if you 'see' Wolfstar or not, that is just plain wrong.

Sirius respected Remus already as a teenager. He (and James, too), cared for his opinion, otherwise they wouldn't have been affected by whatever he thought about their bullying. But they were ('you made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes').

The whole Sirius thinking Remus was the spy thing also shows that he respected him. He saw him as capable - not just as capable of betraying his friends, but also as a capable person in general, a person with an own agenda, not just a copy of him or James. He didn't see Peter like that.

Sirius lets Remus take the lead in the scene in the Shrieking Shack even though the whole taking revenge on Peter/avenging James (James!) thing is most important to him. He does not only let himself be swayed by Remus and lowers his wand instead of killing Peter right after they forced him to transform, he also let's Remus lead the conversation. To me that shows a huge level of trust. He only joins in after Peter accused him of having learned tricks from Voldemort. But before that it's just Remus talking for some paragraphs?

And Sirius listens to Remus not only in that scene, but also in OotP. First he sits down again in his argument with Molly simply because Remus told him so. Then he's waiting for Remus to come back to the room before he even starts telling Harry about the Order business.

Lupin hurried of to the portrait to restore calm. It was only after he had returned, closing the kitchen door behind him and taking hs seat at the table again, that Sirius spoke.

Then he just accepts when Remus says they've said enough without arguing,

'[...] I think Molly's right, Sirius. We've said enough.' Sirius half-shrugged, but did not argue.

Headstrong Sirius, who's even challenging Dumbledore's orders by insisting on telling Harry stuff, who's challenging Dumbledore's orders by accompanying Harry to King's Cross (as Padfoot), who's willing to challenge Dumbledore's orders when he suggests meeting up at Hogsmeade (as Padfoot). But Remus says we've said enough and he is just like 'okay'. Remus says 'sit down' and despite him having been attacked personally he just does. He clearly respects him a great deal.

On a more subtle note (and maybe I'm reading too much into the source material here, but it makes sense to me)... The Prank was not a big deal in canon. At least not initially. But adult Remus tells us in PoA,

'That was still really dangerous! Running around in the dark with a werewolf! What if you’d given the others the slip and bitten somebody?' [Hermione] 'A thought that still haunts me,' said Remus heavily. 'And there were near misses, many of them. We laughed about them afterwards. We were young, thoughtless - carried away with our own cleverness. I sometimes felt guilty about betraying Dumbledore’s trust, of course… he had admitted me to Hogwarts when no other headmaster would have done so and he had no idea I was breaking the riles he had set down for my own and others’ safety.[...]'

And he's still making excuses for the prank in this scene and Sirius still says how, 'it served him [Snape] right'

But then in OotP when they discuss Snape's Worst Memory with Harry, Sirius obviously has some introspection and to me it easily reads as if they had talked about that behavior - as adults,

'I'm not proud of it,' said Sirius quickly. Lupin looked sideways at Sirius, then said, 'Look, Harry [...] if they sometimes got a bit carried away-' 'If we were sometimes arrogant little berks you mean,' said Sirius. Lupin smiled.

He cuts him off and to me it reads like, 'okay Remus, you can stop making excuses for me'. Maybe adult Sirius came to that conclusion himself with being out of Azkaban for almost two years at this point. He's certainly emotionally intelligent enough to do so. But then again, he's incredibly blind when it comes to Snape in general, even as an adult, so I'm not so sure about that.

Other things

Sirius was lounging in his chair at his ease, tilting it back on two legs. He was very good-looking, his dark hair fell into his eyes with a sort of casual elegance neither James's nor Harry's could ever have achieved, and a girl sitting behind him was eyeing him hopefully, though he didn't seem to have noticed. And two seats along from this girl - Harry's stomach gave another pleasurable squirm - was Remus lupin.

I personally think that's over-interpreting the source material, but I've read someone pointing out how it reads like,

'Hormonal male teen doesn't care for the attention of a teenage girl, why could that be, why could that be... oh, here's why: ...'

(let's not forget about asexual people though)

The Original source material getting ridiculously obvious without the author intending so

Okay, so I personally don't set great store by this, but I think it's funny:

Their names being the biggest cliche ever

Remus 'Moony' Lupin and Sirius ' the Dog Star' Black. Moon and stars, come on. All this from an author who's taking the name game to ridiculous levels. (I mean Remus Lupin = Wolf-son Wolf?, even Lyall = Wolf. And Sirius = the Dog Star Black. And he's a black dog.... really?)

Nearly matching Patroni

They have (supposedly) nearly matching Patroni. Remus's is a wolf while Sirius's is supposedly a dog because it usually aligns with the caster's Animagus form. Anyhow, it's supposed to reflect the caster's personality. Matching Patroni are a huge deal in HP. And a wolf and a dog are pretty damn close, meaning that even if they're not 'matching' technically speaking, they (the caster) are pretty damn close character-wise?

But what about...?

All your 'proof' doesn't necessarily mean they're a thing romantically

No, that's right. I'm not saying wolfstar is canon, I'm just saying it makes sense, even from a canon perspective. Obviously the author didn't intend them to be canon. My point is that it's no stretch to read them as being a thing (whatever that means - being together or just having some sort of unresolved feelings) even in canon.

I'm aware that the things I pointed out don't mean much if you look at them individually. I agree. Like, of course joint presents don't have to mean anything, maybe Sirius is just being 'nice', is including Remus. But it's the sum that give off that vibe—at least to me.

But hey, I'm not trying to convince anyone of Wolfstar; I'm just trying to elaborate. I'd be happy if we could all agree that, no matter any romantic feelings, they were very close friends. Because that, as I hope to have pointed out, is definitely canon.

They don't make sense because of the prank

First - they don't have necessarily to have been a thing back in fifth year already.

Second - the prank was no big deal in canon. I've already ranted about this in another post, so I won't repeat myself here. But canonically Remus didn't make a scene. Like it or not, think it's in character or not, but he didn't.

But Sirius disregards Remus's feelings in 'Snape's worst memory

So this is, what we're talking about, right,

'I’m bored,' said Sirius. 'Wish it was full moon.' 'You might', said Lupin darkly.

Again, they don't have to have necessarily been a thing back in fifth year already. Most of the 'show' we get from the original source material is from when they're adults.

And: Sirius being flippant is just how he is, it's not unique to his relationship with Remus, it doesn't mean he disrespects Remus or anything. He's sarcastic with James in that very same scene, too, even though James had just been insulted and turned down by Lily in front of numerous bystanders (maybe not the nicest thing to do?).

'Bad luck, Prongs' [...] 'Reading between the lines I'd say she thinks you're a bit conceited, mate.'

We - as a fandom - are turning the full moons into a much bigger deal than they were - or at least than Remus wanted them to be. ('And they didn’t desert me at all. Instead they did something for me that would make my transformations not only bearable, but the best times of my life. They became Animagi.')

But Sirius thought Remus was the spy - they couldn't have been close in 1981

'Being close' is a matter of definition, like, I can be super hurt and disgusted by someone's behaviour and still the person can mean a lot to me. So I think it's possible that they cared for each other even though Sirius suspected Remus to be the spy. But in the sense of them 'emotionally getting' each other I definitely agree. But - even if they weren't close in 1981 - what does that say about their teenage years? Or about them past PoA? Right, nothing.

But Lily's letter didn't even mention Remus and Remus isn't standing with them in the Order photograph

See above.

But you don't just move past something like mistrusting each other so deeply

Maybe you don't. They did. Because they did, no matter what you think about wolfstar. Btw, Sirius is asking for Remus's forgiveness, so there's that for the whole 'he can't forgive him for not having him gotten out of Azkaban'-thing.

'Forgive me Remus', said Black. 'Not at all, Padfoot, old friend,' said Lupin, who was now rolling up his sleeves. 'And will you, in turn, forgive me for believing you were the spy?' 'Of course,' said Black, and the ghost of a grin flitted across his gaunt face.

The ghost of a grin. Yes, Sirius is obviously very resentful.

And even if they had a chat about it during 'Lie low at Lupin's', even if they worked through some old baggage - by the beginning of OotP they're definitely super casual with one another.

Their whole dynamic is super toxic... The mistrust and everything. That's not a healthy basis for anything

Unfortunately, being toxic doesn't stop people from being in a relationship. But I don't think they are toxic, not necessarily. While I agree that they definitely have issues (I don't see either of them being good at healthy communication; how were they supposed to learn? Besides, both of them have problematic character traits), I do think, in general, they treat each other with respect. And there's no evidence whatsoever for either of them holding grudges about the spy situation. I know people want Sirius to be resentful because they feel Remus deserves it for letting him 'rot' in Azkaban, but there's no evidence for that.

But Sirius didn't seek out Remus's help in PoA when he was after Peter

That would have been risky, wouldn't it? And I don't think there was much on Sirius's mind except for the revenge thing. Sirius is usually quite calm and way less dramatic than fanon makes him out to be. But he loses it completely with the whole Peter affair. I mean slashing the Fat Lady and acting like the mad mass murderer everyone thinks him to be by breaking into Harry's dorm with that knife? (Stupid and also super risky with no wand)

But Sirius isn't with Remus in GoF but rather lives in a cave

Yes, to be close to Harry. Because Harry is his top priority (see below). So what does that prove? He's rather with Harry than with Remus. Agreed. But it's not like he was roaming the UK instead of being at Remus's before. He was somewhere south, far far away to evade seizure. He only comes back because of Harry.

It's understandable, because he feels responsible for Harry (and perhaps guilty because he blames himself for James's death). He doesn't feel responsible for Remus, who is a grown man - and Remus's safety isn't at stake. His own safety is more important than just being with his friend/lover/whatever, but it's not more important than Harry's safety. I think that's a pretty healthy dynamic actually.

Harry doesn't notice so they can't be a thing

Harry is great at noticing some things. Others, not so much. For example Harry thinks Tonks is in love with Sirius, so so much for Harry's perceptiveness. The books being from Harry's perspective is part of the point of Wolfstar making sense.

What about James?

What about James? Is this a contest? No one says Sirius and James weren't best friends (I won't step into the shipping James/Sirius debate here, I respect the ship eve though it isn't my cup of tea). We all agree they were super close. We all agree they were inseparable and that Sirius was devastated about James's death. Following this line of argument Jily makes no sense either (as @myheadsgonenumb pointed out). People are capable of loving their partners (or loving someone unrequitedly or loving someone without realizing) and having a close best friend at the same time.

Plus, who's to say he wouldn't have been devastated if Remus had died, too? People have the ability to care deeply about more than one person (and again, it's not a contest)

BANG! Thin, snake-like cords burst from the end of Snape’s wand and twisted themselves around Lupin’s mouth, wrists and ankles; he overbalanced and fell to the floor, unable to move. With a roar of rage, Sirius started toward Snape, [...]

Yes, Sirius is obviously completely indifferent to what happens to Remus.

BUT it does annoy me that a lot of wolfstar fics are erasing James / are turning Remus into everything James was for Sirius. Like James was just a side character for.Sirius. That's unrealistic. Sirius needs James, Wolfstar or not.

But it's stated Sirius and James only cared for each others opinions, no one else's

Is it really? I've basically already tackled that one above, but, while I agree that they were most important to one another, Sirius himself says to Remus, 'Yeah, well. You made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

What about Harry - the books state he was the most important person to Sirius (and vice versa), not Remus?

Agreed and again - is it a contest? That line of reasoning would mean that parents aren't capable of loving their partners because they have children.

But Sirius wouldn't be with someone who let Harry suffer at his aunt's / who allegedly endangered Harry's life in PoA by withholding information from Dumbledore...

He wouldn't? The backbone of this argument is that Sirius would not trust/forgive someone who did these things. And wether you ship wolfstar or not, that is just canonically wrong. They were canonically close in OotP (see quotes above) - if you're negating this you're being delusional.

I don't think I have to deep-dive into Sirius's character here because it's obvious that he didn't hold a grudge against Remus.

Remus is too much of a loser for Sirius to want him as a partner

I feel like that's pretty much the same argument, so it get's pretty much the same answer: He wouldn't?

The backbone of this argument is that Sirius was too cool for Remus, had not enough respect for Remus, which is, canonically simply not true. No matter if you like it, no matter if you think it makes sense considering Sirius's character, it's fact that adult Sirius respected him very much. He listened to him, he cared for his opinion, he backed down because of him, he allowed Remus to take the lead. He doesn't treat him as inferior. Not a single time.

But Sirius is so much better than Remus, he has a better moral code, he's a better man, a better [insert statement here]...

Again - it doesn't matter much if you think so, or what I think about it. But Sirius didn't think so. Not a single proof he's resentful towards Remus, not a single proof he thinks Remus is inferior to him, not a single proof he doesn't respect him. The opposite actually.

But Remus is such a pushover, it just doesn't fit personality-wise. Sirius needs someone strong

Is Remus really? Because he isn't as an adult. At least not as long as he isn't concerned personally.

I see Remus as someone with deep-rooted self-worth issues, hence he's struggling to stand up for himself (his worst decisions are all linked to his poor self-esteem). But he has no problem in PoA to stand up to Snape (in the scene in the Shack), he has no problem to stand up to Sirius (multiple times in that scene), he has no problem to take the lead in the conversation with Peter. He has no problem to stand up to Molly when she's attacking Sirius and he tells Sirius to leave it to him to deal with Snape when they learn that Snape stopped giving Harry Occlumency lessons (and wrenches him down again). He's not as gentle/soft/pushover-y as people sometimes think.

Besides, we don't know much about how he really was as a teenager. He himself says that he didn't call them out for the whole Snape thing, but his self-perception isn't the best and he tends to blame himself for everything, so we don't really know how true that really is... As mentioned before, Sirius himself says,

''Yeah, well. You made us feel ashamed of ourselves sometimes… that was something….'

And also (before that),

'Of course he was a bit of an idiot,' said Sirius bracingly, 'we were all idiots! Well - Moony not so much.'

But Sirius is depressive in OotP - the long hair, the drinking, his moods...

Yes, of course, he's trapped in his childhood home without being able to do anything, he's feeling useless. No wonder he's depressed. Having a relationship doesn't save you from depression (although having no fulfilling platonic/romantic relationships at all can be a major factor for getting depressed).

If one or two pillars have crumbled that is possibly already enough for the roof to tumble down - even though the third is still standing (surprise!).

[On a personal note: I know what I'm talking about (although not everyone's experience is the same obvs) because I'm suffering from depression despite having a wonderful partner, great sisters and great friends.]

But Harry inherited all of Sirius's money/belongings when he died, not Remus.

I don't know about you, but I don't peg Remus as somebody who would've accepted it. Apart from that, Remus was an adult whom Sirius saw as an equal, just as capable as himself, whereas Harry was Sirius's godchild, whom he felt responsible for (and probably still guilty towards).

But Sirius had his wall plastered with pictures of bikini-clad girls

And I had a poster of my favorite (male) singer over my bed at the age of fourteen. Guess what, I'm not straight.

What about Remadora?

I'm not stepping into the 'Is Remus gay'/'Is Remus bisexual' debate right here because I don't think it's necessary. Remadora was after Sirius's death. Period.

And the whole Remadora ship is awful - for both of them. @lizlemonbennet wrote a beautiful post about that

Tonks deserved better - she was so unhappy pining after him, it was literally sucking joy and confidence out of her (her hair changed and her Patronus changed). Lets talk about her Patronus actually. Before Remus it was a rabbit, after she fell in love with him it was a wolf. If Patroni represent your personality, what does it say about you when your Patronus is your lover's literal prey? To me that's a pretty obviously unhealthy dynamic.

But you're erasing women from the story

No, we're not. Wolfstar was a thing before Remadora and Sirius doesn't even have a canonic love interest. Besides - I love Jily and doesn't Hermione get paired with just about anyone?

But the author stated on wizardingworld.com that Remus had never fallen in love before he met Tonks.

I think the whole killing off Sirius and marrying off Remus thing was just the author dealing with fans interpreting her story in a way she didn't like. Either way, I don't care much about what she wrote on Wizardingworld or elsewhere when it contradicts the original source material. Because the author contradicting herself in interviews, on Pottermore, with the films, and even within the books is really nothing new. Just a short list of her making no sense:

James Potter being a seeker, no a chaser, no a seeker, actually nvm

Saying that Snape was in a gang with the Lestranges ('a married couple') at school, when Bellatrix had already left school when Snape arrived at Hogwarts

Saying James was fifteen in 'Snape's Worst Memory' when he had to have been sixteen. It happened after O.W.L.s and students turn sixteen during their fifth year of school. With his birthday being stated as being in March in the very source material itself (DH), sorry, but that's just wrong.

The whole timeline of the Order deaths in 1981

Halloween 1981 being a Wednesday when it actually was a Saturday (Wednesday - Saturday, close, huh?). The story starts from Vernon Dursley's perspective who's on his way to work and Harry's been brought to Privet Drive the same evening. According to the 'real calendar' this means baby Harry spent over a day alone in the ruins of his parents' house? Cool

September first, 1993, being a full moon, meaning Remus has to have transformed on either the train ride to Hogwarts or during the Start of Term feast. Meet your need DADA professor, he's a werewolf, like, right now. Ups, I guess the jig is up.

Remus not transforming in PoA when he hurries to the Shack despite sun already having set just because the moon is blocked by clouds??? It's that easy to evade transformation, yes? Why not lock yourself in the basement, then?

.... (don't get me started on plot holes, I could rant about this to no end)

Other reasons the ship appeals to so many people

Friends to lovers (with a bit of enemies to lovers because of the spy thing?)

I don't have to elaborate on that do I?

Just the right measure of opposites attract / Like will to like - They're good together or at least have the potential to be

I didn't mean to turn this into some Remus Lupin / Sirius Black meta, but...

In some ways they are super similar. It's both very important for them to be viewed as 'good' by others (although their definitions may differ). Remus because he needs that sort of validation because of his poor self-worth. Sirius needs to be seen as 'good' as opposed to his family. They get each other partly because they know how it's to be reduced to a single trait. But then they act very differently about it - Sirius plunges into action while Remus retreats and masks.

They're both dark in some ways; they were both ready to kill Peter.

James didn't believe one of his friends would betray him. Both Sirius and Remus weren't so naive (Although drawing the wrong conclusions):

You think I'm a fool?" demanded Harry. 'No, I think you're like James,' said Lupin, 'who would have regarded it as the height of dishonor to mistrust his friends.'

Remus is kind/gentle but he's also passive-aggressive at times and sometimes manipulative. Whereas Sirius is harsh, sometimes even cruel, but that means he's also blunt. That has the potential of them dragging one another away from the extremes a bit, meeting in the middle (although Sirius probably would be able to do so on his own, I think most times he simply doesn't care).

While Sirius is much less dramatic and rash than parts of the fandom make him out to be, he has a tendency to act impulsive (acting like a mad mass murderer when he breaks into the castle / wanting to murder Peter without thinking about what that means for his relationship with Harry / jumping to his feet to immediately have a word with Snape when he hears about him dropping the Occlumency lessons). He can do with some sort of counterforce just as Remus needs somebody who forces him to crawl out of his shell.

The drama

They get each other without really getting each other. Sirius thinking Remus is the spy is super tragic because he's reducing him to the werewolf thing, which is the one thing that really hurts Remus.

But he doesn't do that for malicious intent - he does so because he sees Remus's struggle, because it makes sense to him and because he deems Remus capable. But he doesn't really *get* Remus. Because if he did, he would have realized that for Remus it was always most important to be liked/fit in. He'd never betray his friends' trust, because he's so grateful for having them in the first place. He would have rather died, - he doesn't think his life is worth much anyhow (as opposed to Peter). Remus would rather die than risk being shunned.

So he sees Remus but misses the point spectacularly. Which just breaks my heart. And still they're finding back to each other (as friends at least)

Goodbye

Thanks to anyone who's read that far. Again, I don't mean to bash any other ship, this is just about my 'love' for Wolfstar. Don't tell me I can't write a canon compliant Wolfstar story because I can and I will (read: am trying).

I'm also not saying that you have to read it the way I do, it's always interpretation anyhow. But I hope I managed to shed some light on the whole matter.

I didn't check the text because I didn't intend it to get that long tbh. I only had time to write it down because I'm sick at the moment. But I hope there's no holes or anything.

#Can we at least agree that they were close as adults? Bc that would already make me happy (and it's true)#wolfstar #wolfstar defender #remus x sirius #remus lupin #sirius black #marauders #marauders era

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class1akids · 9 hours

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Crowd-pleasing vs THE THEMES

Let's talk about about how Horikoshi brought back Bakugou for another crowd-pleaser moment and managed to destroy several character moments for dubious gains.

I'll start with Shoto.

As I said last week, Shoto's panel placing was odd and it looked like Horikoshi was hiding something. This chapter makes it clear that - as some have speculated - Shoto in that moment, lifted Izuku with his ice. Shoto was the endpoint of the Class A combo, the person who got Deku through the last leap.

The moment - if shown full, god forbid included with a DIALOGUE - would have been a nice and emotional callback to the iconic ice-platforms Shoto made at Kamino, or during Class A vs OFA, when he trapped Izuku in an ice pillar. Shoto is one of Izuku's closest friends - it really would have been nice for him to get something like Iida or Ochako - to parallel an earlier moment (here is an idea: get rid of the jarring US president moment that makes this page needlessly cluttered and put Shoto's ice there!)

But well, ok - if he left him off, that's because there is a twist right? We'll get a big TDDK moment, right? Or we get a finally a satisfying Origin Trio moment?? We'll get to know what was the point of the origins and rising and how it all comes together. Right?

Nope. What we get is Shoto being off-screen again (I'm not kidding you) for a "twist" or whatever, that doesn't even work as one. All these last chapters of holding off the TDDK moment was to reveal that Bakugou Katsuki who already had a huge team-up with Deku to save All Might that was good and satisfying, used Shoto's jump platform to reach Deku. (You didn't even need to hide the ice-platform for that!!)

I guess you could count it as a "recall" to the Class A combo scene in Dark Deku where Shoto and Katsuki work together to help Iida reach Deku or to the earlier Kamino rescue scene where Shoto's ice is the starting point of the rescue

But it really doesn't work when the visual is just this - Shoto gets a panel showing the size of an anthill, when he had Phosphor activated before and if it was gonna yet another ice move, it should have really been knocking on heaven's door and to boot, gets once again no lines and no scene neither with Deku nor with Bakugou in the end.

2. Well, if Horikoshi ruined Shoto's moment with Izuku it must have been for a fantastic, compelling team-up that had to be drawn exactly this way. Right?

The team-up in question is Deku punching through and Bakugou blowing up ShiraGiri's warp gate.

And Deku doesn't even stop and think, there is no internal conflict, there is no question about right or wrong. He went through Tomura's memories, so how much he cherished his friends, but not a single thought was spared about what ShiraGiri was trying to do.

Haha! Hilarious! So satisfying... FUCK THE THEMES!!! WOHOOOO!

3. Was any other dynamic destroyed?

Well, now that you asked, let me remind you that the Rooftop Trio whose dynamic and comeback was already shafted horribly was devolved to this:

Mic's emotional outburst over ShiraGiri's choice turns into wide-eyed Bakugou awe. Mic has no more emotions to spare for the tragic fate of ShiraGiri - what could ever take precedence over another layer of glaze for the main character, the inimitable, forever-winner-of-every-poll, Bakugou Katsuki?

It's a wonderful and logical character conclusion after all for the character who got twisted into an awful, insecure bully partly due to constant praise to share the spot of the most-praised character of the endgame with the toxic, outed family abuser, right? We must make loud and clear that there is a rEdEMptiOn aRC here in case some people missed it and they are so awesome because they are doing exactly what everyone else is. (I miss Bakugou who worked WITH Class A, who put on a tie to stand with them, who took out the trash quietly - that Bakugou was endgame material Bakugou. This current Bakugou to me feels blown out of proportion.).

4. At least we got a fantastic joke out of it. Right? Something new? A nuance and interesting moment between these two. Something special to be treasured by generations to come!

Well, ok. I guess cheritably it works like a recall to Ch 286. Maybe Shoto will catch Bakugou again. Strictly offscreen.

Don't worry. The crowd this scene was made for will be pleased. They have two weeks to gloat at the Ochako fans how Bakugou is the closest, bestest, amazingest, only-ever-important, special friend to Deku. Fuck the rest. They'll make hype, they'll tweet the tweets, blow up the trends and will successfully drown out the voices of the people who don't just focus on a single ship and care about the themes and dynamics and ask:

What happened to my MC?

What happened to the themes?

Btw, I'm not saying necessarily that Bakugou shouldn't have been back or he didn't deserve a moment. He did. He should have been part of Deku Rising last week as everyone else.

But looking at how Hori keeps fumbling the final arc, it's sadly fitting that instead of the chapter that raised Deku to his peak, Bakugou once again steals the spotlight in a chapter that wasn't about him and that tore down everything in a span of 15 pages that Izuku stood for as a main character.

I'd say I'll drop this manga, but it's too late. I'm still invested to see what happens with Touya and the Todoroki family, though after this chapter, my expectations are extremely low. All I can pray for is that Horikoshi doesn't assassinate Shoto's character as he did Deku's.

And maybe Deku is right and there was no other choice than to kill ShiraGiri (something Deku refused to do both to Muscular and Overhaul) and pulverize Tomura's body to ash while offering no words of comfort, but if Deku came to that decision, maybe the space wasted praising Bakugou could have been used for him to reflect on that, to grapple with the choice, to let us feel the sadness and weight of what he must do.

There is so much wrong with this chapter, with how Deku was written in the last part of the manga, with Shigaraki's "conclusion", with the AFO-overload, etc. This is just a small part of it. But I wrote it to show how much a badly placed scene can destroy several other important moments.

RIP THE THEMES. Crowd-pleaser won by KO.

#bnha meta #bnha 423 #bnha manga spoilers #bnha manga leaks #todoroki shouto #midoriya izuku #present mic #kurogiri #bnha 422 #i feel rage and emptiness #to alternating degrees

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subsystems · 21 hours

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Hello -

As a person with DID who has successfully fused alters/parts, do you have any information, resources, or advice for systems hoping to do the same?

My system is hoping to reach a point where we can act and function as one, but it’s been horrible trying to find resources on fusion. Nearly every article about fusion we could find places this second to functional multiplicity and seems to confuse fusion and integration. Or worse, claims that fusion is a way to kill alters!

Our therapist has been immensely helpful, but we find ourselves wanting to read more about this process or hear from others who have successfully managed a fusion. Any help would be greatly appreciated - thank you!

Hi, anon. I'm so sorry that you've been struggling to find resources on your desired recovery. I went through that struggle too, it's hard. I'm glad you have a therapist to help you out through all of this.

If you want, I've talked about my own experience with final fusion on this blog and I'm always open to talking about it more if there's anything in particular you want to hear about!

Definitely seek out other systems who have experience with partial/full fusion, too. Off the top of my head, there's @system-of-a-feather, @reimeichan, @hiiragi7, and @smokee78 (hope it's okay to tag you guys!). They haven't been active recently, but back when I was working towards final fusion, @puppydeathfarts made posts that I found really helpful. If there's anyone else who has experience with partial/full fusion, though, please leave a comment!

I also recommend checking out Rachel Downing's experience with final fusion/full integration and Jess's from Multiplicity & Me:

youtube

Their experiences helped me feel less alone when I was pursuing final fusion. There was also another person, but unfortunately they left the community due to harassment and deleted their posts. I will forever for grateful to all of them for being brave enough to share this vulnerable and personal part of their lives, they've certainly given me the strength to share my own.

As for articles, unfortunately I don't know of too many that don't stigmatize final fusion. DID-research offers a good summary of final fusion and a few interesting links to check out here.

You can find a bunch of free downloads for self-help books here. Out of all of them, I feel like Coping with Trauma-related Dissociation is a great self-help book for people who are a being supported by a therapist and interested in pursuing harmony and stronger integration within their dissociative system. I don't think it would've been possible for me to achieve final fusion or even functional multiplicity without the techniques I learned from this book. I cannot emphasize how useful it is!

Some extra things from me:

You have to work with your parts, first. You can't skip ahead to fusion. Aim to pave for understanding, acceptance, and harmony within your system. Fusion, if you want it, is the natural progression to that!

There are ways to test out fusion. Talk to your therapist about "blending" (it's also described in the coping book, but definitely mention it to your therapist). You can test out what it's like to be fused as many times as you want.

Fusion can feel weird at first. It shouldn't feel bad, but it can be strange. It took me time to get used to it. It can also feel differently depending on what stage of recovery you're in... ->

When I still had amnesia and less co-operation in my system, fusions slid under the radar and surprised the hell out of me! As I continued lowering those dissociative barriers, developing better communication and co-consciousness as a system, things become way clearer.

After you become fully fused for the first time, it's completely okay if you fall apart a few times before it really sticks! Final fusion is a process, not a destination.

You're allowed to choose whatever labels you want after final fusion. Call yourself a system or plural or say you've become a singlet or whatever you want. It's also okay to go unlabeled!

Your parts aren't gone after final fusion, but that separation is gone and it's okay if you need to mourn that. Sometimes I miss what it was like being fragmented. It's not because I want to be fragmented again, but because that was how I lived my entire life up until now, it was what was most natural to me, and it had its good and bad sides. I'm thankful for it because it was that separation which allowed me to survive! I view this similarly to how it was like to move recently. Sometimes I miss my old home, but that doesn't mean I want to go back or that I'm not happier where I am now. Things can be complicated like that!

After final fusion, you continue to learn new things about yourself and your system. It's a new journey in of itself -- a very, very wonderful one. 💚

I hope you find something helpful here. Either way, know that you are not alone on this journey. I support you whole-heartedly. Good luck with everything!

- Sunflower

#actuallydid #DIDrecovery #DID recovery #final fusion #integration #DID support #sunflower answers #personal experiences #apologies for how long it took to answer this ask

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fangirlwriting-stories · 22 hours

Text

Shifts In Perspective

Summary: Sam holds a Phantom protest.

...

“I just… I don’t understand it,” Valerie says. “We’re enemies. Right? Like we actually are. But I swear he took that hit for me. There’s nothing else he could have been doing.”

Danny, for his part, has adopted his usual strategy when Valerie starts talking about Phantom: say as little as possible. So instead, he just makes a small noise of acknowledgement.

“I just don’t know what to make of it, is all,” Valerie says. “I mean, I don’t know. Does it sound like him to you?”

Stopping you from getting hurt by one of my parents’ weapons? Yeah, that sounds like me, Danny doesn’t say. Instead, he adjusts the bandana that hides his hair over the sunglasses that hide his eyes and says, “I don’t know. Not from what you’ve said of him before.”

“I know,” Valerie groans, turning so her board flies into the alleyway in between the buildings ahead. Danny tightens his grip around her waist from behind so he doesn’t fly off.

“And he put himself in harm’s way too,” Valerie continues. “I don’t understand it.”

“I don’t either,” Danny says. And because he can’t help asking, “So uh, what are you gonna do about it?”

“Right now? Nothing,” Valerie says, taking them up over the next building. “But it was definitely weird. I want to know more. Maybe… maybe I’ll just pay closer attention, watch him for a little bit.”

Well, that doesn’t say anything about what he should do. He really doesn’t want to manipulate Valerie’s feelings in regards to him, even if her no longer actively hunting him sounds nice. But he can’t see any clear direction for ‘I’m going to watch to see what I can learn.’ Obviously he’s not going to suddenly start being nefarious. But if he does more good deeds than usual, that’s manipulative, right? But it’s not like he can just ignore it if people are in danger, and he can’t just stop fighting ghosts.

Honestly, there are times he wishes he hadn’t found out who Valerie is just because of the headache of trying to figure out how to act around her anymore.

“That sounds like an okay idea,” Danny says anyway, because he has to say something to that. “Just be safe, okay?”

“Aww, are you worried about me?” Valerie asks, and Danny can hear the tease in her voice even through her mask. “Don’t worry, Danny. I’ll still kick some ghost butt.”

Danny smiles a little. “I have no doubt about that.”

Valerie laughs, and flies them both down to an alleyway a little ways from the school. Danny hops off, and after making sure no one’s around, takes off his sunglasses and bandana.

“Thanks for the ride to school,” he says.

“No problem,” Valerie says, retracting her suit into her backpack. “Sure beats the bus, huh?”

Danny grins. “You said it.”

They walk the rest of the route to school, holding hands until they reach the parking lot, at which point they let go. Danny did manage to ignore his guilt at the idea long enough to tell Valerie he doesn’t want Sam and Tucker to know they’re dating. Valerie asked no questions, which Danny appreciated. But that means all their dates take place outside school, and inside, they act as they always have— or, as they always have since they became friends.

So as they part ways in the hallway, Valerie turns and gives him a bright smile, says “See you at lunch,” and that’s that.

Danny grabs his stuff from his locker and starts heading for his first class, when suddenly, as he’s walking past the janitor’s closet, he hears a very clear sob from the inside.

He startles and turns to face it. He doesn’t hear another sob, but there’s some very obvious muffled breathing.

“Uh you okay?” Danny calls. He knocks gently on the door, only for it to swing open, the person inside clearly not having shut it all the way.

The person inside whirls around, and Danny stares at her for a minute, stunned.

“S-Sam?” he asks, trying to process what he’s seeing. “Are you alright?”

Sam pulls in a shaky, horrible sounding breath, and gives him a terrible attempt at a glare.

“Leave— leave me alone,” she gasps, but it ends with her pressing her hand over her mouth in another sob.

“Hey,” Danny says, his hands and concern both shooting up as he takes a step into the closet. “Hey, what’s wrong, you—”

“I said leave me alone!” Sam screams, and reaches out and shoves him hard back into the shelves of the closet. Danny wheezes, the wind knocked out of him, but Sam runs out past him before he can say anything else. Danny runs out into the hall as soon as he gets his breath back, but Sam’s already gone.

…

After that, Danny doesn’t see Sam for the rest of the morning, which makes him even more concerned. He looks for a chance to talk to Tucker about it, but doesn’t manage to find one before lunch. So he meets up quickly with Valerie, tells her he’ll be right back, and heads quickly to the lunchroom to check on her.

Instead, he finds Tucker sitting alone at a lunch table. He looks up as he sees Danny approach, and looks away quickly after, but Danny can still see the nerves on his face.

“I haven’t seen Sam all day,” Tucker says anyway. “Do you think she’s sick?”

“She’s not,” Danny says, looking at Tucker until he draws his gaze. Tucker looks at him for a whole half a second before looking back down at the table, which has to be a record for lately.

“Actually,” Danny says, sitting down across from him. “I found her this morning crying in the janitor’s closet.”

Tucker’s head snaps up, and now he’s looking at Danny. “What?”

But before Danny can explain the little he knows, a box slams down on the table next to them, startling them both.

“We’re having a protest about Phantom,” Sam announces, glaring down at them both from over the box.

Danny and Tucker both exchange a brief glance before turning back to Sam. Her face hasn’t changed from the firm glare she’s wearing.

“Um, okay,” Danny says, carefully. “Sure.”

He doesn’t want to ask why, because while he doesn’t see any traces of that morning’s breakdown in her face, the fact that he hasn’t seen her since then can’t be a coincidence.

“You’re joking, right?” Tucker asks, looking at Sam in a way Danny can’t read.

“Absolutely not,” Sam says, with a harsh glare right at Tucker. “My permit’s in the box, we’re setting it up after school.”

“You and me?” Tucker asks.

“No, all three of us, obviously,” Sam says. She still hasn’t sat down. “I’m not just going to leave Danny out.”

Danny raises his eyebrows slightly but doesn’t say anything. It doesn’t feel like it would go over well to say much.

Tucker, however, does not seem to get this memo. “Sam—” he starts.

“Great,” Sam snaps instead of letting him finish. “I’ll meet you out front after school. Bye.”

With that, she picks up the box again and storms off again without sitting down.

“She’s joking, right?” Tucker says after she leaves, seeming to be directed more at the empty space than at Danny. Danny responds anyway.

“I don’t think she is,” he says slowly. “But really, she didn’t look great this morning. I don’t know if…” he trails off, not exactly sure what he’s trying to say.

Because what he’s thinking is I don’t know if I should take this too personally.

But he can’t say that to Tucker.

He looks after Sam for a moment, but though he can feel Tucker looking at him, when he turns Tucker just drops his gaze back to the table.

But after a second, he nods. “Okay,” he says. “After school, then.”

Danny nods. “Yeah,” he says. And that’s that.

…

Sam really goes all out. It isn’t that surprising, especially with how rich her family is, but it’s still rather impressive in the course of a single day.

There’s giant posters with his face— well, his face as Phantom— on them, inside a stereotypical red circle with a line through it. Sam hangs up a list of major grievances right next to the stage that’s already set up. There’s stuff like property damage, public disruptions, time taken to finish fights, and a list of every single person who’s ever gotten hurt during a ghost fight. Admittedly, the last part stings the most. Danny keeps away from the stage.

He personally is standing at the archway entrance, handing out rubber bracelets that read “Phantom Sucks,” which, well if anything he can laugh at the irony.

And for the most part, he’s succeeding in his “don’t take this personally” plan. Sure, it doesn’t feel great that so many people show up, many of whom he recognizes. There’s people who got caught in the line of fire and some whose cars got smashed or store windows got broken.

But for the most part, Danny’s able to keep his mind off it all. In part because he’s put himself technically out of the actual event, and in part because he’s thinking more about Sam’s slightly manic energy as they helped put everything up. This still feels like an aftereffect of the way he found her this morning. Which just makes it more worrying that he doesn’t know what’s wrong.

He’s interrupted while watching Sam up on the stage, making a speech that, thankfully, he can’t quite hear.

“You are kidding me, right?”

Danny turns to see Jazz standing behind him with her arms crossed.

“Okay look let me explain,” Danny says, holding his hands up.

Jazz turns her head to the sky in exasperation.

“Jazz, seriously,” Danny says.

“Fine,” Jazz says, waving a hand at him. “I’d love to hear it.”

“I found Sam having some kind of breakdown in the closet this morning,” Danny says, glancing briefly back at her. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I don’t think this is really about me.”

“And that means you have to show up why, exactly?”

Danny crosses his arms. “I’m worried,” he says.

“You can do that at home.”

“Yeah, okay Jazz, thanks,” he says, glaring at her a little bit. “I’m just waiting until I can get a chance to ask her what’s wrong. Then I’ll come home and you can lecture me.”

“Who said I was going to lecture you?” Jazz says. “You’re free to make your own terrible choices. Have a great time at the Danny Phantom protest.”

She turns and starts to walk away.

“I’m really not taking it personally,” Danny says before she’s too far away to hear.

Jazz glances back at him again. She looks him up and down for a couple seconds, obviously scrutinizing, before her glare fades just a little.

“Okay,” she says. “Good.” And then she leaves.

Danny sighs and leans back against the cardboard archway, shortly before realizing that’s not a great idea when the flimsy cardboard collapses and he falls on top of it on the ground.

“Cardboard, it’s cardboard,” he mutters to himself as he pushes himself back up, and pulls the arch with him.

“Danny?”

Danny squeezes his eyes shut. Oh, great.

“Valerie, hey,” he says, turning to face her with the best smile he can muster. “You here for the protest?”

Valerie, however, has a look of slight disgust on her face, which throws him off guard.

“Uh, no,” Valerie says, which doesn’t help in his confusion. “Are you?”

“Oh, nah, I’m just helping Sam out,” Danny says with a glance back at the stage that hopefully just screams “casual.”

Valerie steps up next to him, and when Danny looks over he sees her looking at the stage. He’s not sure how he feels about the look on her face.

Sam screams something about how dangerous Phantom is loud enough for the two of them to hear, and Valerie wrinkles her nose.

“Wow,” she mutters after a second. “I hope I haven’t ever sounded like that.”

Danny blinks. “Huh?”

Valerie turns to face him. “Let’s get out of here,” she says.

“Uh, I was actually waiting to talk to Sam,” Danny says, looking back at the stage. “She… I don’t think she’s alright.”

“Oh she’s definitely not,” Valerie says. “Let’s get out of here anyway.”

“What? I can’t just leave her if I know she’s not okay.”

“Sure you can,” Valerie says. “She’s been awful to you. I know that, and I don’t even know everything that’s happened between you guys. She also hasn’t asked for your help. You can’t be telling me you want to be here. You don’t look like you want to be here.”

Danny crosses his arms. “Of course I don’t want to be here,” he mutters.

“Then let’s go,” Valerie says. “Come on, I’ve had a date idea I’ve been meaning to take us on for a while.”

Danny hesitates. He looks up towards the stage one more time.

…He’s not getting Sam’s attention any time soon. And he can always ask her what was up tomorrow.

Danny takes a deep breath, pushes his guilt to the side, and turns to Valerie. “Okay,” he says. “Let’s go.”

…

Valerie takes them both a ways away from the protest before she pulls out her board. By the time she does, Danny’s been expecting it though, so he puts his bandana and sunglasses on and climbs on behind her. Then he wraps his arms around her so he doesn’t fly off as she takes off.

He wouldn’t be in any danger if he did fly off, but she doesn’t know that, and that’s not really how he wants her to find out.

Valerie doesn’t go nearly as fast as he can, but she still likes to go fast, and Danny can appreciate the rush of wind in his face as they both head upwards. For all the problems being half ghosts causes, he’ll never get sick of flying.

They both end up high in the air, high enough that Danny can see the clouds around them.

“Are you nervous being this far up?” Valerie asks as they stop. “We can go lower if you are.”

Danny shakes his head. “I trust you,” he says. It’s only a partial lie. He knows Valerie won’t let him fall.

Valerie smiles back at him, then hits a button on her board that locks it in place, and sits down, pulling her hood off. Danny pulls off his bandana and sunglasses and sits down next to her.

“We’re gonna be up here a while,” she says, leaning back on the board. “For the sunset for me, and then the stars for you.”

Danny grins. “Awesome,” he says. He doesn’t have to try too hard to get excitement in his voice. Even though it may not be his first time stargazing this high up in the air, it never gets old for him. And doing it with someone is new. He’s glad it gets to be Valerie.

Valerie grins back at him, and leans back on her board. There’s just enough space there for her to lean on her hands, and Danny marvels a minute at how calm she looks. She doesn’t have any natural abilities to rely on up here. If something goes wrong with that board, as far as she knows, they’re both in trouble. He wonders for a minute who she got it from. She said they were anonymous, but she must trust them for some reason.

“So hey,” Valerie says, bringing an end to his thoughts and drawing his gaze to her. “Can I ask you something?”

Danny nods. “Sure.”

“When you talked before about someone who makes you feel like you’re just around to vent to. Was that Sam? And the thing she vents about all the time, was that Phantom?”

Danny looks away. “Uh,” he says, “maybe.”

Valerie doesn’t say anything for a moment. When she speaks again, it’s definitely not what he expects to hear.

“Danny, why didn’t you tell me to stop talking about Phantom all the time?”

Danny looks over at her in surprise. “Huh?”

“You had to be sick of it. And you had to have not wanted to hear me go on about him too. Tell me to stop, dumbass. I will.”

“But you were angry about him because he ruined your entire life,” Danny protests. “It’s not fair of me to ask you to stop talking about all your problems.”

“Danny, that’s like, what our entire relationship is built on. We don’t ask about things the other person doesn’t want to talk about. Why shouldn’t that go the other way around too?”

“Because—” Danny starts, but he’s not sure where to go once he does. Because our not talking about anything made it so I never realized you were the Red Huntress? Because our not talking about anything means you still don’t know I’m Phantom? Because maybe sometimes we actually should talk about these things?

“Danny, I don't want you to make yourself miserable for me,” Valerie says.

“I’m not miserable,” Danny mutters.

Valerie snorts.

“Hey!”

“Well, come on. I’m not blaming myself entirely. But Danny.”

Danny looks down and starts fidgeting with his hands. “You weren’t supposed to notice that,” he mutters.

“I like you,” Valerie says. “We’re dating. I’m supposed to pay attention, aren’t I?”

Danny doesn’t say anything.

Valerie reaches out and takes one of his hands and squeezes it. “Hey,” she says. “Tell me what Sam and Tucker do that bothers you so much.”

“It’s not their fault.”

“Did I ask whose fault it was?”

Danny moves their hands so their fingers are interlaced and looks out at the sky. Partly because the sun is starting to set, and partly because it’s easier to talk when he’s not looking right at Valerie.

“We’ve been friends since we were little kids,” he says quietly. “They’re two of my favorite people in the entire world.”

“But?” Valerie prompts.

“I hate being around them now,” Danny says, wiping at his eyes with his free hand. “It’s never fun. It never feels like I can just enjoy the time. Sam is… angry. Constantly. And before, she— I mean she’s always been passionate about things, but this feels different. And Tucker never looks at me anymore. And he won’t tell me why or what’s wrong. And every single conversation we ever have is about Phantom. I mean, can’t they give the guy a break? He’s not perfect! And he shouldn’t have to be! Why does everyone expect him to get everything right all the time? It’s too much to put on one person— ghost, whatever,” he finishes with a mutter, stopping himself before he says something he shouldn’t.

Valerie’s quiet for a long moment, and Danny looks away and braces himself for some kind of comment about how he has to keep in mind that Phantom is dangerous, and it’s good that Sam and Tucker are wary of him, and god, he wants to go home and sleep.

Instead, however, Valerie turns him back to face her and pulls him into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry, Danny,” she murmurs.

Danny sniffs, and rests his head on her shoulder. “For what?”

“Making it harder for you,” Valerie says. “I mean, you still should have asked me to stop. And I’m not kidding about wanting you to do that from now on. But I am sorry.”

“You have a reason to be upset,” Danny manages.

“Yeah, I do,” Valerie agrees. “But there are things I have in my life now that I didn’t have before.” She squeezes Danny one more time and pulls back, smiling at him. “I’m closer with my dad now. And I wouldn’t trade that relationship for anything. And I’ve got you, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything either.”

“Those didn’t happen because of Phantom,” Danny says weakly. “You did that.”

“I know,” Valerie says. “But I’m starting to think… my life doesn’t have to be about him. I don’t have to define myself based on what happened with Phantom. And I mean, seeing that protest today, I…” Valerie shakes her head. “Maybe I’ve been a little hard on him.”

Danny sniffs, and wipes at his eyes again. “Sorry,” he says before Valerie can say anything. “I don’t know why I’m crying, ‘s stupid, I—”

“Oh shut up,” Valerie says. She pulls him back in for another hug, and doesn’t seem to mind when Danny takes the chance to shake in her arms.

“Hey,” she says after a while, and Danny pulls back to see her looking up. “The stars are out.”

He looks up and sees that she’s right. He sniffs again and blinks quickly to stop his eyes from blurring.

Valerie wraps her arm around Danny and points up at them with her free hand. “Which constellations can you find?”

Danny leans his head on her shoulder, and looks to find the stars that are visible. So high up, there’s less light pollution, and more to see.

“Aquarius,” he croaks, and neither of them mention how terrible his voice sounds. He points up at the constellation. “That star there is the supergiant Sadalmelik, and you can follow it down to Sadalsuud. But you can’t see the whole thing. We’d have to go further out in the country.”

“Next date, got it,” Valerie says with a smile in her voice.

“And that over there is the square of Pegasus,” Danny says. Valerie follows his point. “See it?”

“I think so,” Valerie says.

Danny sniffs one last time and drops his hand. “Sorry we talked all through the sunset,” he says.

“Oh yeah, I’m real pissed about it,” Valerie says in an obvious tease. “We have no choice but to do this again so you can make it up to me.”

Danny’s smile fades, and he doesn’t say anything. Valerie doesn’t say anything else, though, and for a long while they both sit there.

Rather than stargazing, Danny spends it trying to feel better about the decision he’s made.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #valerie gray #sam manson #tucker foley #jazz fenton #gray ghost #everyone knows au #my fic

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acourtofthought · 14 hours

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I usually ignore accounts like yours (people who dedicate years to posting anti content), but your whole Truth-Teller argument is posted in such bad faith. You’re so clearly trying to twist the canon of what happened in ACOWAR to make it seem less significant by claiming that Azriel only gave TT to Elain because of Mor (which is a GIANT reach).

Here are the facts:

1. Mor begged Azriel not to fight, sure. But Azriel could have kept TT to himself, as he always has for CENTURIES. He didn’t have to offer up his weapon.

2. Azriel could have given TT to ANYONE. He could have given it to Rhys, or Cassian, or Mor (and all of those options would have made sense, given that they’re warriors). But he didn’t. He gave it to Elain.

3. The scene was significant enough that it’s symbolised on the ACOWAR cover, and has a dedicated page in the ACOTAR colouring book.

4. SJM could have written a scene in ACOWAR where Lucien offers Elain something of his instead (or even just anything romantic between the two). But he was too busy rescuing Vassa 🤷🏼‍♀️

Then there’s this comment you made, and it’s just laughable: “Did Elain seem to care about Az never having given anyone TT? Did she seem to appreciate this oh so rare and special occurrence? Or did she walk away without looking back?”

Elain never once appreciated Lucien’s gifts - they literally soured her mood. Elain has turned cold at most of Lucien’s advances and loses her newfound boldness around him. Elain was about to make out with the hottest dude in Prythian without a single care that Lucien was in the same house.

But sure, Elain handing back TT is so awful and so unromantic……

At the end of the day, SJM has very clearly set up BOTH Elriel and Elucien. There is substantial evidence and foreshadowing for both. But you don’t get to erase that evidence and foreshadowing just because you don’t personally like it.

Well, you can try, but you look very silly doing it.

Hottest dude in Prythian? Has anyone outside the NC ever called Az hot in canon? NOPE

SJM did set up E/riel! She set them up to be a rebound. Hers after Graysen and his first step towards the idea of letting go of Mor. I have never once claimed that there was not evidence of something happening between them, I simply pointed out the red flags in their pairing. Just like we saw the romantic setup for Tamlin and Feyre yet they were not meant to be endgame.

If you want to know what a real romantic setup looks like I suggest you check out the TOG series. Celaena still didn't end up with one of the love interests but their romance was written beautifully and not once did the MMC ever think "he hadn't gotten that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to."

Awwww.....it's really cute you're putting so much weight on E/riel because of a coloring book as if that means something for endgame pairings. If I recall, there was also a scene of Feyre in her wedding dress...the one she wore to her wedding with TAMLIN.

Also, it's not symbolized on the cover of ACOWAR. The cover does not feature a hunting knife which TT is. The cover of ACOWAR features a pretty dainty dagger. Can you imagine Az wielding that around? It looks like a toothpick.

The scene is meaningful because of what Elain went on to do with the knife. Her stabbing the king is iconic. Az giving it to her is really not. Not when he only gave it to her because of Mor and not when it was Cassian who first had the thought of trying to give Elain a weapon. Not when he never gave her credit for stabbing the king. Not when she returned it and never looked back. And you're right, Az never gave it to anyone else because they were all warriors with their own weapons and he fought beside them. Why would he part with TT when he was in battle? When has he ever sat out of battle where an unarmed female was in need of a weapon to defend herself? Had she taken Cassian's Az would have never suggested TT and had Feyre not assured her she wouldn't have to use it she might have also never taken it. Might I introduce you to my favorite word "logic" because it will help you to understand why things came together the way they did and made it possible for Az to be in a place to even considering lending it out and it had nothing to do with his love for Elain. Not when he went on to look at Mor with heat and yearning months later.

Elain doesn't appreciate Lucien's gifts? So weird because I'm sure those words never once came out of her mouth and she still has them. We can't say that about Az's one gift to her though, can we? I wonder what Gwyn thought when Clotho gave it to her. I wonder if her eyes did truly light up just as Az imagined they would.

Elain loses her newfound boldness around Lucien? JUST Lucien? What exactly would you call her whispering "I'm sorry" after Az rejected her? What would you call it when she looked away from Az's smile in the book which left Cassian puzzled or her hands shaking when she handed him his gift? So very bold of her!

And Papa Archeron actually rescued Vassa considering HE is the one who bargained for her freedom. Lucien might have been with him at the lake but it's not Lucien who freed her. Also, are you honestly romanticizing Vassa's kidnapping? Thinking Lucien "I'm a mated male now and had no interest in female company" was thinking about romance while on his way to a war? Who is twisting canon again? And you're right, Lucien didn't offer Elain anything during battle because he was out risking his life for her vision, something Az didn't really care about after his big declaration that they needed a Seer.

I hope that you enjoyed your time deviating from your norm of ignoring Anti accounts such as mine (probably a lie anyway). I'm sorry to say that your words have had absolutely no effect on my opinion so from my end it seems like a waste of time but you do you.

You want to sit there and criticize my blog for having anti posts yet you're out here starting trouble so I create more. Make that make sense.

#anti e/riel

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buttdumplin · 16 hours

Text

A John Price meet-the-fam special!! This is pure, indulgent fluff.

1.2k

CW: gn!reader, latine reader

When Price first meets your family, it goes over smoother than fucking water over a polished worry stone. It just is. You thought it might go like that, knowing that he’d do practically anything to make himself fit in as seamlessly as possible. But you also knew that bringing home a white guy always comes with a very specific brand of first interactions.

You prep him for the teasing that’s to come, about his accent, about his complexion, about the food he eats. John takes it all in very seriously, nodding along and asking probing questions. It’s all for your benefit, and he’s incredibly mindful of that. You don’t necessarily need to know he’s already got a plan of action, though.

By the time you arrive at the family home, you’re a little stiff, braced for the barrage of probing questions that’s to come. You can tell the family is curious, you see the tías eyeing up and down. But there’s no interrogation this time. Because John beats them to it. He’s polite and answers all the niceties as respectfully as he can. And then he immediately launches into offering up information, as cryptic as it may be. He dons that dimpled smile of his and tells them what he can.

“I’ve been at this job for a while now, but I’m retiring soon. It’s actually my personal life that I'm more invested in improving now.”

“I’m hoping to buy a home in the very near future. Maybe like this one, a big family place. I’ve been tucking away money for it for a while now.”

“I’ve had to spend a lot of time away, but I’m really looking forward to staying home with this one.”

The tías are swooning when he makes intense eye contact with you across the table as he speaks. He’s not hiding any kind of intentions, from you or them. None of the information is particularly new to you, but hearing him say it out loud? In front of all the people important to you? It’s one thing when it’s quietly discussed in the early hours of the morning. It’s another thing entirely to hear it all said in such a permanent way.

At one point, your godmother, as entrometida as she always is, mentions she’s willing to go shopping with him if he’s ever in need of a ring, says she’s always had a good eye for your style.

“Oh, no. Se lo agradezco, pero ya no va a ser necesario,” he replies with an even bigger smile, and it’s got the women hollering. They’d take a bite out of him if they could. John carries himself with the firm confidence of knowing who he is, and they can see that. They respect it.

The tías, predictably, also do everything they can to keep you two physically apart. You’re put on comal duty, keeping you in the deep corner of the kitchen where he can’t reach you. John himself doesn’t try to reach for you, wanting to spare you the godforsaken “chiflando y aplaudiendo” even at your big age. So he keeps busy by setting the table, asking only where he can find the cups and tableware. They all ooh and aah.

“Ven? Ni se le tuvo que pedir,” they shout at the tíos, pointing at John’s busy hands.

A few questions do pop up once dinner is set. Do you eat this kind of food? Have you had this before? Do you like it? Tíos razz him into adding more and more salsa on his food, and John, knowing full well how it all ends, goes along with it. He’s managed to build up some tolerance that he’s quite proud of, but there is no way that’s saving him. He knows what he’s in for. A single bite and his face turns so red it’s almost purple, his coughing making it hard for him to get water down. The tíos laugh and he’s smiling along with them, the tías rushing to get more water and napkins and a cup of milk because “I heard this helps white people?” You swap his plate out for a new one while they’re all caught up with John, taking a few bites of food to try to match it to the dish he had before.

A bubble of softness blooms in the room. The tías are cooing over him, consoling him after his “brave attempt.” The tíos take turns patting his back, smiling down proudly at him for having met their challenge. He smiles back at you from across the table, knowing full well what you’ve done to his food, spotting a few more veggies than he’s originally served himself. The tablecloth is long, surely they won’t spot him gently nudging your foot with his own.

When your godfather invites him out onto the porch for a smoke, John knows it’s his time to shine. He asks you to stay inside with a wink. He brought those Cuban cigars with him for a reason, he’s sure he’ll make it through. You hold him at the door for a second longer, just enough to give him a tender kiss before sending him along. Neither of you missed the way your godfather so clearly recognizes the way John moves, his own military past helping read further into the man you’ve brought home. You know there’s a good chance of this not going perfectly.

Ignoring the calls from your tías, you crawl to sit below the window that lets out right behind them. They both let out soft grunts as they settle into their chairs, a long hum of appreciation from your godfather clearly signaling John has opened the cigar box for him. It’s silent for a while. The only sounds come from the lighter and their soft exhalations. Then a soft rustling begins. It’s not the trees, it’s too muted for that. It’s not gravel, they aren’t going anywhere and they certainly didn’t make their getting-up grunts. No, it’s their clothes. Because they’ve come up with hand signs on the spot, across languages, so you can’t listen in.

There’s some chuckling, surely that’s a good sign! But the low sigh coming shortly after isn’t very encouraging. You try to make sense of it somehow, but there’s no distinct rhythm to it. And suddenly you’re twelve again and trying to sneak a peek. You may not need a stool to help you, you’re tall enough to see through the window on your tiptoes. Maybe if you do it slowly, they won’t notice. So slowly it goes, your knees creaking as you inch up. Their rustling continues; good, they haven’t noticed. Yet as stealthy as you try to be, they’re both looking directly at you as you finally get eyes on them. Their smiles all too knowing. You godfather winks at you, clicking his tongue fondly. He holds a hand up before you can say anything, groaning a little as he rises. He takes a beat to look down at John. You’re all frozen for a moment. And then your godfather’s hand comes down firmly on John’s shoulder, giving him a sturdy shake.

“Me meto antes de que la vieja huela todo este humo,” he says. It’s done. No disaster, just acceptance.

When you turn back to John, he’s already got a mad grin on his face, “See? This old white boy’s still got some moves.”

AN: I am buckled the fuck in for all this latine reader content, so yall will be seeing a whole lot more of it. Thank you again to @mikichko!!! For your support and encouragement, and your incredibly generous feedback. I'm doing this to feed us both.

Let me know if yall wanna see anything with latine reader in particular!!

#captain john price #price x reader #price x latine reader #latine reader #cod x reader #cod x latine reader #cod #my only non poly fic to date lmao #but maybe if you squint there's still room for it #and price's spanish?? fucking delicious #uses it so deliberately too #mans knows exactly what he's doing #i didn't realize this would end on the line it did and it made me fucking CACKLE #hope yall enjoy!!

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sometimesliterate · 4 hours

Text

blade, ratio, gallagher, sampo, welt yang, and nanook with a shorter s/o

yeah !!! i'm trying something new-ish !! its all mostly fluffy, gallagher's is slightly suggestive and so is welt's. keep in mind of course that they'll all love you regardless and theyre just giants, so you could be like damn near six foot and still be shorter than them. this aint just for 5'0 people ( although it was written by a shortie so,,, yeah ) GENDER NEUTRAL READER !!!

BLADE —

oh you're shorter than him ?

honestly he doesn't even notice half of the time

it's not like he's always searching for someone who's shorter than him so he can take care of them or whatever

it was just life that you were shorter than him and he wasn't really one to make a fuss about anything

but that doesn't mean that he's absolutely immune to your charms, in any case

sometimes he sees that you're struggling with something and that he can help you

other times he finds you to be rather useful yourself

especially when trying to hide when out on a mission, he finds that your height allows you to be a little bit more conspicuous than him

something that he doesn't necessarily mention, but you've come to expect it at this point

if you're out on a mission together, you can best believe that you're the one sneaking into wherever you are while blade is laid low behind you ready to strike if you failed

he'll always always always praise you for your efforts and your abilities to hide in plain sight from others

not necessarily your height, but just your skills in general

sometimes if you have the time to be a little slow with how you moved about, he'd pull you closer and give you a little kiss on the top of your head

affection wasn't necessarily his thing, but if you were doing such a good job helping him, who was he to deny you

you were putting your life down on the line for the mission. this was something that he never took for granted, even though he often went in head first without caring because he didn't have to put down his life for elio's path. he was actively going down this path to reach that finality, but you weren't. you forced him to go about missions with more finesse, because he was absolutely terrified of failing you. often, he would be there as a backup, ready to spring in at a moment's notice if you needed him to be there. you were shorter than him, so you were usually tasked with infiltration, just like now. you could clearly see the goal - it was right there in reach. but of course, with many things, there was also guards hanging around the area, protecting the gem and keeping you at arm's length away from it. of course, blade wanted to cut everyone down and just take it by force, but he knew that wasn't how you did things, and that cutting them down would mean that there was a high chance that more guards would come running. and he couldn't bring himself to put you in that kind of danger, so he let you make a plan in your head. he watched as you snuck past the guards, using things that would show his taller, larger form as a perfect hiding spot for yourself. when you snatched the gem right under their noses, and you came back to him, he couldn't stop himself from grinning a little bit. " good job, " blade whispered once you were in a private area together, allowed some time off. " maybe your height helps you out in certain situations. " " yea- hey ! are you calling me short ? " " yes, " he leaned over, pressing a gentle kiss on the top of your head. " but it's cute. you're cute. " you let out a quiet little sigh, but you eventually wrapped your arms around him, feeling the man stiffen up in your arms at the sudden contact, but he soon melted within your touch. " mm. whatever you say, bladie. i just don't think you'd be very good at sneaking around. " he chuckled, sitting his head on the top of your head. " i think you're right about that. "

RATIO —

ratio does not and will not care about your height

your physical attributes were never what attracted him to you in the first place

although you being so attractive definitely helped, but he wouldn't openly admit that unless you held him by gunpoint

he liked the breath of fresh air that you brought into his life

how vibrant and charming you were, effortlessly piercing through his walls with such expertise he almost didn't want to trust it at first

but he still treated you how he treated most people, including scolding you when you did something wrong, and scowling when you suggested something that he didnt want to do

however, there was one thing you could do that made him fold ever single time

the way you looked up at him through your pretty lashes, pouting as you tilted your head up to look at him and whispered your little apology

you just looked so.. cute like that, he can't stop himself from letting out a fake sigh of annoyance before telling you not to do it again and ultimately letting you have your way

there was nothing he could do against you, he had no defenses to protect himself against your pouting

especially when you had to tilt your head so high up just to look at him

if he didn't know better he would be sure that you did this one purpose just to get your way

ratio called your name once from downstairs, and you froze immediately in place, knowing that tone in his voice. he was disappointed in you for something, and you weren't sure what it was, but you were sure that you would get your ear chewed out and that you would get another lecture on your behavior. you debated on whether or not you should just give up easily and listen to him, and resign yourself to listening to his lecture, or you could pretend to be asleep and get out of his disappointment for just a little while, but ratio was not a man who forgot, and you knew that well by now. no matter how much you wanted to run, you knew that you had to own up to what you did. after he called you the second time, you slowly walked downstairs, finding him in the living room, his legs crossed as he read a book, his reading glasses on. " you called me, love ? " you asked nervously, sitting beside him. " are you forgetting something important ? " ratio closed his book, resting his head on his hand that sat on the armchair as he looked at you, his eyes narrowed. you thought a moment, before your eyes widened, and you rushed into the kitchen. you'd completely forgotten that you were baking some cupcakes ! what happened ? you found them already taken out, cooling on top of the oven. " o-oh no, i'm so sorry, ratio- " you apologized profusely. you turned around, just to find him right behind you, his eyes trained on yours. " your little mistake could've ended badly, " ratio shook his head, and you could feel the guilt creeping up into you, knowing that you had messed up, and now you were paying for it. " you're very lucky i had an eye on it. " you pouted, feeling both embarrassed and guilty that you'd forgotten something like this, feeling like you were about to cry, the hot tears welling in your eyes. you looked up at him through your lashes, unsure how to convey your sincere regret. " i'm so sorry, veritas. " ratio stiffened for a moment, looking into your eyes, and he felt his resolve crumble. he couldn't be mad at you when you looked up at him like that. his hand found its way on the side of your cheek, gently caressing the side of your face. " just.. don't do it again, okay ? "

GALLAGHER —

oh man he thinks you're cute

your height was just part of your charm

it wasn't necessarily a make or break thing where you were required to be shorter than him

but he had to admit.. you were absolutely adorable when you wanted something from him

particularly when you wanted to kiss him, and the lengths that you would go to get a kiss from him

( one that he was willing to give you, but he would make you work for it a little first. he's a tease like that )

he'd watch you with his arms crossed as you looked up at him and asked him for a kiss

and when he would say come get it, you would stand up on your tippy toes and try to kiss him

but he would just lean backwards so you couldn't reach him

then you would pout, and your brain would think about all that you could do to get that kiss that you so desperately want from him

sometimes you were silly with it, sometimes you weren't

sometimes you would grab one of the bar stools and use that to add to your height to kiss him

sometimes you would just grab him by his collar and pull him down for a kiss

sometimes you would use your charm to get him to cave and finally give you what you wanted

it really just depended on the day, something that he was always eager to find out

" gallagher, " you called out, approaching him from behind the bar, waving at him excitedly. he looked up at you, his hands busied as he cleaned the rocks glasses, the towel in his hand buffing out any fingerprints on the pristine glasses, making them look just as perfect as penacony itself. you'd come to share some good news with him about your own job, but the way his messy hair was in his face made your heart swell just a little bit, and you smiled, looking up at him through your lashes. he knew exactly what you wanted without you even asking, and all gallagher did was hum in response. " sorry, honey, i'm a lil busy right now, " his gaze flickered from the glass in his hands to you, and then back to the glass. " maybe you'll get a kiss later, yeah ? " you pouted, hoping that you wouldn't have to go through this again, but also secretly rather enjoying this little game that the two of you played. you leaned forward, your hand on his shoulder for support as you tried to kiss him, but he just leaned away from you with a small chuckle escaping his chest. " maybe later, babe. " he shrugged you off, and you just let out a loud sigh. " come on, pleasseee ? " you begged a little, before finally deciding that, fine. he can have it his way. you knew the bar would be closing soon, and that no one would be in, probably. so you just hopped on top of the bar, your hand holding onto his shirt to keep him close, your legs spread slightly so he was as close as possible. " i've got to close the bar, " gallagher tried to half-heartedly tried to reason with you, but his hands were already gripping the bar beneath you, and he was already leaning in for a kiss, his lips grazing over your lips. " you know better than this. " the glasses, you figured, could be cleaned later.

SAMPO —

haha what a loser

imagine being shorter than the great sampo koski

your height is something that he will point out every single chance he gets

ooh he's so much bigger and stronger than you, of course you needed him

it only made sense that you were dating him, he was soooo perfect for you in every way

yeah it helped his ego, and yeah he wasn't going to let it go easily

no matter how much you pouted and complained about his inflated ego and sense of self worth

he would dramatically announce that he was going to do something for you

practically declaring to the world how thankful and loving you should be that he was so benevolent to do these things for you

he's just looking for some praise and a little attention, something that you both knew well

and if you point out how much he just craves your recognition, he'd turn into a sopping wet cat

sampo did the thing for you !! you should say thank you and give him a kiss !!

that's how relationships are supposed to work and he did the thing that he was supposed to do

its only natural that he would want a reward for all of his efforts

even if he spent the last thirty minutes teasing you about your height

" you're just so short, " sampo teased, playfully ruffling your hair as the two of you walked down the streets of belobog while you glanced down at the map in your hands, looking for what you had assumed would be a wild goose chase because sampo said that if you found it, it would make the two of you rich beyond belief. of course, there was a solid chance that it was something that he stole and he was just using this as an excuse to be close to you for a little while. seriously, what are you going to do with him sometimes ? you sighed, shaking your head to shrug off his hand from your head, trying not to get frustrated with him, but he made it so hard sometimes. especially with his nonstop teasing and jokes, like he knew that he was getting on your nerves and yet he continued to do exactly what he was doing regardless. " sampo, are you required to make fun of me every single second of every day ? " " come on, now, doll, i'm not making fun of you ! i'm just pointing out a fact ! you need me, right ? you need me and you can't live without me, and you love me so much. " sampo shot you a cheeky little grin, making your face heat up just a little bit. he was right, but he didn't have to say it like that. " samp- " just as you began to speak, the map you were holding blew out of your hands with a strong gust of wind, flying high up in the air, far too high for you to catch it, even though you did try to reach for it. sampo, however, grabbed the map with ease, oh-so gently place it back into your hands. " see, my point is proven by the winds themselves ! you need me to help you when things fly out of your hands ! " sampo declared victoriously, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer into his side while he walked. you let out an audible sigh, but leaned into him, deciding that he had done well enough. " thank you, sampo. although, we're putting this little treasure hunt on hold, and we're going to grab a snack. i'm hungry, and i have a sneaking suspicion that we aren't going to be rich by the end of the day. "

WELT YANG —

welt does his absolute best not to point out the height difference between the two of you

he knew that sometimes height was a sensitive point so he wouldn't say anything that he thought would bring you discomfort

although, secretly, it's a point of endearment from you

especially when he has to help you out with things, like reaching the top shelf or picking you up a little bit so you could see over a crowd

it made him feel useful and helpful, a feeling that he loved

he liked that you didn't hesitate to ask him when you needed help, no matter what it was

because you were his partner, and he loved you dearly

he'd do anything that you needed him to do, happily

but his absolute favorite thing was when he does things for you without you asking

and then he gets to see your happy face beaming at him while you said thank you

and, as a reward for his kindness, maybe you'll stand up on your tippy toes

and use his shoulders to keep yourself steady as you kiss his cheek

and maybe, just maybe, he'd be able to wrap his arms around you and pull you in for more kisses

what ? he doesn't indulge in himself all too often, he deserves it sometimes, he thinks

the astral express had stopped at a world just for a little while to have a small break. after the events of the last world, you all desperately needed some time to rest and take your minds off of these things. the three trailblazer kids were all out and about, no doubt getting into some trouble no matter how many times someone told them just to enjoy their stays. himeko had left to go ' check up on the coffee shops in town ' as she put it, but you were nearly sure it was just to give you and welt some time to spend together alone, since it very rarely happened. there was almost always someone that you had to take care of within the express, and he always had something else to do, too. not that either one of you minded, since you truly did love everyone on the express. you were up early, making a cake for everyone for when they came back. you knew welt was still in the bedroom, probably just waking up. you had made the cake pretty much on your own, there was just one thing that you needed, that you couldn't find no matter how hard you were looking. you just needed to find some candles to make it look special. who cares if it wasn't a birthday ? you finally found them on the top shelf, and you were almost out of options, about to just climb up on the counters to get it. when welt's body pressed up against yours from behind, his hand on your shoulder as he reached up and grabbed the candles you were wanting. " were you looking for this ? " he asked, handing it to you. " yeah ! thank you, you're the best ever. " despite him just giving them to you, you sat the little package down, leaning against his chest, your hands holding onto his arms. " whatever would i do without you ? " " climb up on the shelf to grab the candles, " welt joked softly, leaning down to bury his face in your shoulder, gently kissing the smooth skin. you laughed softly, turning around in the man's arms to face him, your back pressed against the counter. " mm. yeah, you're right. i could've died. " you stood up on your tippy toes, your arms wrapped around his shoulder as you kissed him gently on his cheek. " thank you, welt. for looking after me. " welt hummed, his hand moving up from your waist to your cheek, tilting your head up so he could press a hungry kiss on your lips. you had a little while until anyone was back home, and you two had an idea how you could spend that time while the cake was baking in the oven.

NANOOK —

to be quite fair,, they're an aeon

everything is going to be shorter than them

you could be the tallest person of your race and you would still be an ant to them as long as they were showing themself as the aeon of destruction

for you, though, it was more often that they had a shorter, more human form

with a little less golden blood dripping down their torso, and a little more legs

unfortunately for you, you were shorter than them in this form, too

who would've guess that they'd be huge even in their human form

they don't really care honestly because they feel like mortals like you should be shorter than them anyways

like a fucked up power play kind of thing

they're a god, you're not. of course you should be shorter than them

they're a very serious being, and its very rare for them to crack any jokes

but they will sometimes use your head as an armrest while just talking normally to another

kinda like they were branding you as theirs ?

after all, who's going to mess with someone who the aeon of destruction is using as their armrest ?

they like how it annoys you, but you won't do anything about it

you'll just sit there and pout while they publicly claim you as theirs

" my liege, " phantylia the undying bowed at the presence of her aeon, a sight that almost no emanators go to see regularly. nanook was always doing something, always at the edge of a solar system ready to reign destruction upon it. to see nanook engaging in anything that wasn't ultimately tearing worlds apart with their bare hands was a rare sight indeed, especially for those who didn't travel the cosmos by their side. you would have to be unfortunate enough to come across them, as phantylia was now. when she picked her head up, she finally took notice of the small human standing next to the aeon, and she flinched for a second, as if she weren't expecting there to be anyone there. " oh- my liege, you have- " " company, yes, " they grumbled out, their large hand gesturing to you, although their words were cold as they regarded you. " do not bother to get acquainted. " phantylia nodded, immediately assuming that you were going to be killed by nanook, or they were forcing you to watch as they burned your home world. perhaps, even, forcing you to hold the lighter as they did so. she almost felt bad for you. almost. she wondered if she would be able to toy with you, too. surely nanook would indulge in one of their emanator's whims, no ? before she could voice her question, her eyes flitted towards nanook, and she noticed that they had their arm resting on your head, and your arms were crossing, looking up at them with a pout on your face. " nanook- " you whined, glaring at the taller aeon. " do i look like an armrest to you ? " " no. in fact, you look less than, " they commented dryly, their gaze turning to you, and phantylia swore she saw something akin to affection in his golden eyes. " but i suppose you offer me a little usefulness from time to time. " " all of this time travelling together and you still treat me like a little lapdog, " you shook your head, and although you were still frustrated with them, you turned to phantylia, giving her an almost warm smile. " sorry about that, they're... weird. it's nice to meet you. " the moment nanook's gaze fell upon her, and phantylia felt like she had been sliced through with a hundred blades just for talking to you, her heart retching in terror from the shear intimidation alone, she figured that it was better for her own self that she didn't answer you. when you were alone that day after phantylia left, you were in their arms, watching with mild amusement as people tried the craziest shit just to get their attention. " why do you do that every single time someone approaches us ? you're always picking fights with the people who probably have at least not horrible intentions. " what's mine is mine and i don't share, " they replied plainly, their attention focused elsewhere. " and there's no point in you introducing yourself again if they'll just be dead before you can remeet. "

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magnifythesun · 2 days

Note

ianthony prompt: Anthony competing for attention for an oblivious Ian vs a protective cast over their papa ian hehe

heehee this one is cute, thanks for the prompt!!

(post writing note: trying to tread these character dynamics yet keep it feeling realistic is such a fun challenge! I hope I succeeded! this ended up being way more about the aftermath of a situation like this than examples of it happening lol but i hope you enjoy anyway)

When Anthony returned to Smosh, his first goal was to speedrun as many types of new videos on Smosh Pit and Games as possible. Try Not to Laugh, 2 Truths 1 Lie, Reading Reddit Stories, on and on the list went. His schedule was packed. Yet even during the chaos, Anthony started to notice a pattern.

When it was just him and the cast without Ian during a shoot, everything felt surprisingly comfortable. The big ensemble cast ones too, like the slapping video, great vibes all around (bit of a painful cheek though). They were all meshing so well, so quickly, and Anthony was eternally grateful that they were welcoming him with open arms. There was just one thing.

When a video was just him, Ian, and a couple other cast members, he was getting the strangest feeling. Not that they didn't want him there, he was pretty sure. That was the feeling he'd been afraid he'd get when he first came back. Rather, he got the feeling that they were constantly trying to pull attention away from him. Well, not the attention of the viewers. Just Ian's attention.

Anthony knew that he and Ian could get a little wrapped up in themselves sometimes. He couldn't really help it; with their long history together, they had a lot of inside jokes and an acute sense of what joke would break the other immediately. So they would share a glance and suddenly be laughing, giggling over some stupid joke like a couple of teenagers again, and it would be as if there were no other people in the room.

And each time, promptly, one of the other people there would interrupt, saying Ian's name, asking him a sudden question or pointing out something else so that Ian would look over there. Sometimes they'd even physically move Ian away, subtly of course. At first Anthony hardly noticed, but then it kept happening. And then he realized that often, it was accompanied by an almost pointed look at him by whoever was doing it.

Sometimes, they would get tag-teamed. For example, during a video of a light-hearted Mario Party competition, he and Ian were starting to 'yes, and' each other into oblivion, grinning and carrying on over some joke from a ten-year-old video, when suddenly Angela was pulling Ian's arm and getting him to react to something on the screen while Chanse tapped on Anthony's shoulder to show him a trick on the controller. Before Anthony knew it, somehow Angela had swapped spots with Ian on the couch. A little off-kilter, Anthony just bantered with Chanse for the rest of the video instead. To be fair, Chanse had a very similar sense of humor to Ian, so it actually went very well. Still, Anthony just couldn't tell why stuff like this kept happening.

He felt a little confused, and from that was a vague sense of hurt. Had he done something wrong? Ian never seemed to notice, so Anthony tried to push the whole thing to the back of his mind. Surely he was just reading too much into it.

On another video, Anthony, Ian, Arasha, and Courtney were facing off in Everybody 1, 2, Switch. When they went to pick teams, Anthony reached out a hand, ready to pull Ian to his side of the room, when Courtney suddenly popped up beside him, snagging his arm and raising it to the sky in victory.

"Anthony's my partner," They said gleefully, shooting a glance at Arasha, who was herding Ian to her side of the room.

"Heck yeah, dad and son team," Ian said, a little grin on his face as they high-fived. He shot a playful glare at Courtney and Anthony. "You're going down!"

"Dickbiscuit!" Arasha chimed in, looking like the cat who ate the canary.

"Gotta give them their father-son time, Anthony!" Courtney said, rather pointedly, and Anthony got that feeling again. Like there was a plot against him, but he wasn't sure why. It left a sour feeling in his stomach, and he felt bad about it. Anthony definitely didn't mind being on a team with Courtney instead of Ian, but why did it feel like she and Arasha didn't want him to be on a team with Ian?

It was time. He was at a point in his life where he'd rather just talk about something instead of letting the poisonous thoughts rot inside him. Right after they wrapped the video, he walked over to Courtney.

"Hey, could I talk to you over there?" Anthony asked quietly, trying to make sure Ian couldn't hear.

Courtney gave him an inquisitive look. "Yeah sure!" They headed to the little hallway behind the set walls. "What's up?"

Anthony shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably. "Well, uh. Well, first of all, I may be totally misreading this."

Even as he spoke, he could tell he probably wasn't. Courtney's eyes had sharpened with understanding, and a slightly guilty yet defiant look was coming over her face.

"I've just been noticing—" He paused, thinking how best to say it. "Well, nothing specific, I don't think, but I can't help but feel like..." He took a quick breath and just got it over with. "Sometimes in these smaller videos with Ian, it feels like you guys don't really want Ian to talk to me?" He glanced at Courtney, stomach sinking as he continued, the worst fear coming to his tongue. "Or maybe you guys don't want me there?"

Courtney didn't look defiant at all anymore, now more gut-punched in a way that made Anthony feel terrible. Could he really have been misreading it all so badly?

"Or, maybe not!" He put his hands out placatingly. "I'm so sorry, I think I was maybe reading too much into things?"

"Oh god, well, no, um," Courtney stammered. "Look, I'm sorry too. You haven't been misreading."

Anthony's stomach dropped. They didn't want him here?

Courtney must have seen his expression and she reached out to grab his arm reassuringly. "Oh my god, not about not wanting you here. We're all really happy you're back, Anthony. This has been amazing."

The emotional whiplash was really starting to get to him. "Oh. Well, that's good!" He smiled weakly.

"We've just been," She paused thoughtfully, "A little protective over Ian, I think. There's an element of, you know, what if you decide this isn't for you after all, and leave again." She looked down, and continued quietly. "I think it'd wreck him, honestly."

Anthony's heart seized and he took in a shaky breath. "I can promise you," He said firmly. "That won't happen. He put a hand on their arm too, squeezing lightly to try and emphasize how serious he was. "This is what I want to be doing, full-stop. And running this whole thing with Ian means more to me than, than anything in the world."

Courtney smiled at him, a shaky, slightly teary thing. "I think, deep-down, despite our fears, we could see that. It's obvious every time you look at him."

Anthony dropped his arm and dipped his head, a little embarrassed. "Well, I can't help but be excited about it, you know?"

Courtney laughed, "I'm sure. There is one other aspect to the whole thing you've been sensing though."

Anthony looked back up apprehensively.

"With you around, he doesn't do the bits he's built up with everyone else as much!" She laughed again, clearly more at herself this time. "It's silly, but we're all a bit jealous!"

"Oh. Oh!" Anthony didn't really know what to say. He raised his hands up guiltily and said, "Whoops."

Courtney covered her mouth to try to laugh more quietly. They were still only separated by the wall of the set from the crew, and presumably, Ian.

Anthony started laughing too, rather relieved about the whole thing. He'd been so worried that there was some really big grievance the whole cast been hiding, an anvil dangling, ready to drop on his head. "It's just like you said, right?" Anthony said as he caught his breath. "Gotta give them their father-son time!"

"Exactly!" Courtney beamed at him.

Anthony smiled, but he felt compelled to continue. "Look, I just want to reiterate. About the leaving thing."

"Yeah?" Courtney said.

"I just," There was a dragging pain in his chest like the words were being pulled out of him. "I love him, you know?"

He'd said it before to Ian, that he loved him, best friend to best friend. But there was something about saying it now, to Courtney, secretly behind this set wall like this. It was haunting almost, like a specter sneaking up behind him to tilt his world permanently on its axis. He wasn't unfamiliar with the feeling. It was often associated with something he needed to work out in therapy.

He shook it off, took a breath. "I never want to hurt him like that again. He means so much to me. I won't let us fall apart like that again."

Courtney tilted her head slightly, narrowed eyes studying his. His breath felt caught in his chest. A moment, then, "Woah." Her expression brightened, suddenly mischievous.

Anthony blinked at her. "What?"

They grinned, "No, no, nothing, haha!" They had that funny wild look in their eyes that usually only came out for the cameras.

"What?" Anthony asked again, a slightly unnerved smile taking over his face.

Courtney shook her head. "No, um, you know? I think this changes things! Sorry about everyone, haha, we're just— well, you know, he's our guy, our 'Smosh single dad,' 'the dad who stepped up,' our 'single working mother,' whatever! We were all just a bit protective of him, but hey look!" She threw her hands out like she was pitching a deal. "I'll pass the message along, that you're, well, uh. That you, um. That there's nothing to worry about here! Just leave some Ian for the rest of us, yeah?"

Courtney started to back away, looking like they were going to bolt and Anthony was so confused. "Sorry about that by the way? I didn't realize I was stealing him," Anthony said.

"No you, well—" Courtney stopped. "Anthony, you do know that whenever you're there, Ian's like, fixated on you, yeah?"

Anthony had not realized that and he was not quite sure why his chest felt all at once like he had just performed a long, far too strenuous yoga session. He kept looking at her as if an explanation would be forthcoming, but Courtney was just looking back at him with wide eyes.

In this moment that felt like it resided somewhere on the spectrum of Wild West duels, Ian came around the corner.

"Oh hey," He said, and then frowned at them when they both jumped. "What are you two doing behind the set?"

"Hey Ian!" Courtney said brightly, and Anthony could hear that hidden relief underneath. "Great to talk with you, Anthony! See you later!"

Ian watched them leave and then turned back to him, suspiciously.

"Are you two plotting some kind of video?" Ian raised his hand to his chin, thinking. "Like, a prank video on me I'm not supposed to know about or something?"

That would be a great idea, Anthony thought a little deliriously. "I don't know, Ian, I guess you'll have to find out."

Ian narrowed his eyes. "I'll have you know I'm great at getting revenge."

"Oh, should I beware?" Anthony teased, the tight feeling in his chest easing up.

Ian scoffed. "Beware all right. I'll get Arasha on my side and then it'll be all over for you and Courtney."

Anthony grinned and walked over to him, slinging an arm over Ian's shoulders to guide them both out from behind the set. "You know, I keep hearing about Arasha's scheme prowess. Wanna show me whatever video that comes from?"

"Oh god, it's a whole series of videos," Ian said, already pulling out his phone. "Brace yourself, it's a wild ride."

#ianthony #asks #my fanfic #aaaa i really like how this one turned out!! i hope y'all like it too!#thank you for the ask!!#i have a grand total of five more in the backlog right now #thank you all so much for sending them! <3

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latibvles · 14 hours

Text

points on a map.

this is... [loud kazoo] rather late but oh well! better late than never. related to this piece, this next one is plucking from the prompt crew and, as you can expect: is an introduction to the rest of Viv and Willie's crew! It was fun to write though, so I hope you enjoy it (will these make it onto ao3? maybe. no it is not proofread, sue me) Meet Inez Eckley, our very lovely navigator. All of these OCs will be on the carrd very soon!

—

It takes ten people to fly a B-17.

Not ten men, or ten boys — ten people. That was it. Really early on there used to be a joke, the setup was always the same: how many girls does it take to fly a plane? To no one’s surprise: Inez never found it funny, no matter how many times the punchline changed. It takes ten of me just like it takes ten of you.

She’d never said that, never had much of the courage to open her mouth about it. Luckily, the other navigators she knew either didn’t have the same sentiments or just kept them to themselves — Inez optimistically hopes for the second.

“So we’re just… puttin’ pins in it?” Inez asks, turning to Croz and Bubbles. Croz nods, gives her a bit of a sheepish smile and Inez tries not to squint at the now blurry map in front of her — her glasses feeling like a cross where they hide under her jacket beneath her shirt.

“Pretty much. It’s a tradition.” He affirms.

“Gotta know where everyone’s from.” Bubbles tacks on immediately after — his smile is a little brighter. It doesn’t surprise her: Inez is fairly certain Bubbles was the one who was gonna run around and shoving red thumb tacks in people’s faces. Inez nods once, slow and pensive, before reaching for one of them.

“Ladies first, then?” She wants it to be a statement — but she can’t help but ask. As if they’d have her set up the map on the wall for a boys only activity.

She catches a glimpse of Harrie Morgan over in the corner, trying to nudge one of the guys out of the way so she could listen to the fight on the radio, and assumes that her worry isn’t a crazy assumption to make.

“So y’don’t forget about us,” Inez tacks it on at the end, a bit sheepish, fixing her gaze now on the plastic between her fingers. When she looks back up — Bubbles is still smiling brightly.

“Sure thing. You can do the honors.” He encourages, and that much makes her smile a little bit as she nods once to herself then takes a couple steps forward. She squints a bit, trying to will the text into becoming more solid, trying to recall the maps she’d pour over during practice missions over the States. Inez hesitates a moment, settles on the spot and hopes that she’s hit her target. Turning her head, Bubbles and Crosby are both looking over at where she’s placed it.

“Nashville, huh? That makes us neighbors,” Bubbles puts his own above hers. “Louisville.”

“Guess you’ll have to visit then. We’ll make a day out of it. Hit all the real touristy spots.” Inez offers. There’s a vision there that has her smiling to herself — one where her mother overfeeds them because they’re “too skinny to be Army,” and Croz, polite as ever, doesn’t know how to say no to her. “You too, Bing. And it’s your turn.” Crosby seems to perk up a little bit, takes his pin and tacks it right onto Iowa. Bubbles chuckles to himself, arms crossing over his chest.

“Yeah, you gotta visit. Th’hell’s back in Iowa.” He teases, and Inez can’t help the quiet laugh that escapes her. By the time they got back from this, Iowa would have Mrs. Jean Crosby again, who’s letter was probably sitting comfortably in Croz’s jacket pocket right about now.

“Don’t get him started, we’ll be here all day.”

ii.

Harriet Morgan, their ball gunner, has successfully stolen the seat closest to the radio. Carrie Hughes, one of their waist gunners, is standing awkwardly to her left when Inez tracks them down. Harrie’s leant forward on her elbows, the guy next to her, Roy Clayton, gives her a questioning look, expression twisted into one of mild annoyance as Amison messes with the knobs of the radio.

“You even got money on this, Morgan?”

“No, but ma’ pa might!” The expression on her face is bright, and she flashes him a sunny-side up grin — all crooked teeth and crinkled eyes. Carrie says nothing, but her cheeks flush in that mildly embarrassed way that they always do when Harrie’s garnering a bit of attention for herself. Sometimes, Inez is marveled by the fact that Carrie continues to follow her around in spite of her own introversion — but the world was full of mysteries and Inez figured this one would just have to go unsolved.

Harrie, as usual, is none the wiser.

Inez clears her throat on her approach, drops a hand on Carrie’s shoulder to squeeze it and give her a half-smile.

“Got a second to spare? Wouldn’t want you losin’ your seat, after all,” Harrie’s grin turns a little mischievous, and she waves her hand flippantly as she jumps up to her feet.

“Roy gon’ watch ma seat for me, ain’t that right?” Roy makes a face, a mix of shock and protest that falters almost immediately upon Harrie holding his stare for another second or two. Harrie claps him on the shoulder. “‘Preciate it, pal,” before clapping her hands together and jumping up to her feet. Inez thinks she hears Carrie mutter a sorry Roy under her breath. Inez can’t help the small laugh that leaves her as she guides the two of them towards the map.

“Shouldn’t take more than a minute.” Inez offers, but Harrie whizzes by her like a dog catching a scent, sidling up immediately at the work-in-progress amalgamation of push-pins.

“Well what’s all this then?” Her question is as bright as the rest of her and Inez only wonders momentarily how it is that she can treat every minor occurrence as though she’d just found a winning lottery ticket. Carrie’s interest, although more subdued, is still piqued — Inez can tell by the way those big brown eyes of hers light up in curiosity. June had made a couple jokes about the girl being the baby deer of the group: the nineteen-year-old was really living up to it now.

“Croz and Bubbles say it’s a tradition. Gotta put a pin where everybody in the group’s from.” Carrie tilts her head, brows furrowed — although Harrie wastes no time in taking one from the table and smacking it onto the map. Somewhere South, but that part was obvious.

“We get to…” Carrie’s voice trails off, but Inez knows how that question was going to finish, so she nods.

“All thirty of us. I went first,” That makes Carrie smile, and Inez pats her back before gently pushing her towards the map, before sidling up on its opposing side to squint at where Harrie found her mark. Montgomery, Alabama. Carrie, however, is more subdued about it — she simply points and voices it, as opposed to doing it herself.

“Denver,” Carrie offers and Bubbles puts the pin in.

“Ever been to the Rockies?” He asks with a bit of a tease. Carrie lets out a small huff.

“Do I look like a mountain climber to you, sir?” And now it’s Inez’s turn to snort at the barely there bite of Carrie’s remark — one that has Harrie laughing loud and unapologetic. Silently, Inez just hopes Carrie keeps sharpening that edge of hers’ until it gleams, if only for her own sake.

iii.

Inez knows that when their radio op smiles at her and promises she just needs to finish up this last game, that it is the beginning of a doom-coming.

Not for Fern, of course. Never for Fern — Inez was fairly sure she could talk Eisenhower himself into giving her a brand new fort for free. The doom-coming being for the wallet of whoever Fern has successfully deceived into thinking she was actually bad at darts: this time, it seems to be Quinn and Blakely — Hinton being her newfound accomplice. Inez doesn’t know how they haven’t been made aware of Fern’s goal to sucker at least half the 100th before they reach England, but that’s none of her business.

“No shame in callin’ it quits now, Carmine. I’ll even halve the winnings for ya,” Bailey drawls, and Fern scoffs lightheartedly. She puts her hands on her hips, cocking a brow and tucking a loose strand of shiny auburn hair behind her ear. There’s a slight pout to her lips. Hook, line…

“Don’t tell me you’re calling me a quitter, Bailey. Matter of fact, I hit this double eight and we double it. Two bucks each.”

Sinker. Quinn looks reluctant, but Bailey agrees — so they all cough up another bill to make it eight on the table. Fern takes her last dart and passes Hinton one of those award-winning smiles of hers, and Inez is reminded briefly of how they had her posing up by the plane for pictures back in Sioux City. And how a passing remark about how she should’ve been painted on the plane, not flying ‘em had earned the offender a fist to the teeth from June.

She lines up the shot, takes in a deep breath and then…

“Boop!” Fern declares as the dart finds its target, to the collective groaning of both Quinn and Bailey. “Thaaank you! And thank you!” She swipes the cash from the table, hands four to Hinton and then pockets the other four, before turning to Inez. “Heard something about a map, is that it?” Fern is looping their arms, her cheek brushing against the side of Inez’s head.

“Four whole dollars. You’re really stretchin’ that Mouse Hole piggy bank,” Inez remarks, and it makes Fern laugh a little with a shake of her head.

“Once we hit England it’ll burst all on its own,” She declares, definitively, then listens intently as Inez explains exactly what it was they were doing. The map’s got a few more pins — from Brady and Blakely and their crews. By the time they hit it, Fern’s already opening her mouth and unlooping their arms, pointing at the spot on the map in one fluid motion. “Racine, Wisconsin, boys, riiiiight there.”

iv.

Josephine Alden was always good at not taking up too much room — with Lorraine next to her, they would have the quietest corner of the bar were it not for Lena Connolly filling it with her own storytelling of tales from home. Jo seems more intent to listen than Lorraine, who’s eyes have fallen decidedly further down the bar, towards some back-and-forth occurring between June and Douglass. For a moment, Inez idles behind Lena, trying to figure out the best way to worm herself in.

Noticing this, Josephine gives her one of those warm and acknowledging smiles of hers.

“Did you need something, Inez?” she asks, shifting the attention towards her. Well, Lena’s attention at least. Lorraine still seems preoccupied.

Inez smiles, rubs the nape of her neck.

“Bubbles, Croz, and I are wranglin’ people to tell us where they’re from. Keep track of location and stuff. There’s a map for people to put pins in their hometown. I just wanted to make sure we all got ours,” she explains, looking over the three of them. Lena nods slowly, and Josephine is already straightening out to get up and head over.

Lorraine’s lips tug into a frown, dark eyes flitting from her back to the scene she was watching unfold in front of her.

“Do I have to?” And, despite knowing her, the question still manages to knock some of the wind out of Inez all the same. It’s not posed with a whine, but that sort of indifference that she takes towards most things that didn’t pique her immediate interest. Inez has shared a bunkhouse with the woman for the better part of a full year, but sometimes she still has to remind herself that it’s rarely ever personal; that it’s just Lorraine. Slow to convince, slow to bite down on anything without an incentive.

Sensing Inez’s own faltering, Lena taps in — a clap on Lorraine’s shoulder and a smile up at her.

“Haven’t seen Pasadena Nena touch down yet,” she casts a look to Josephine sliding off the bar stool, “Or Sparky.” Josephine perks up, an animated full-body thing so unlike her typical reservations that it even catches Inez offguard.

“That’d make us first, wouldn’t it?” Josephine points out. “First of the girls, at least,” She looks to Inez for confirmation, and it dawns on her all at once — so she nods almost too quickly in confirmation.

“Uh huh. Croz and Bubbles even let me put the first pin in it,” Inez admits. Lorraine’s brows raise just enough for her to notice, and there’s a twitch of Lena’s lip in knowing they’ve thoroughly incentivized her into something else.

Lorraine Ivanova didn’t care for much — but she did like to be first to things.

“Alright,” she assents, and Inez smiles a little more genuine, guiding the trio back towards the map. Josephine lets the other two walk in front of her, whipping around to raise her hand in greeting. Inez looks back to see who it is — only to realize all at once that she doesn’t know who it is that Josephine’s waving to. A member of Brady’s crew, maybe. By the time Inez is turning back around, Lorraine is taking one of the push pins to jam into the map wordlessly.

“Brooklyn,” Josephine murmurs quietly to Inez, as Lena mimics it, her own pin nearly on top of Lorraine’s. “And the Bronx.” She knew the two were from New York — but the differences between all those little neighborhoods made her head spin on a better day. Inez gives Josephine an appreciative smile that the girl returns, patting the spot between Inez’s shoulder blades before stepping towards the map and pointing.

“New Englander, huh?” Bubbles points out as Croz presses the pin into its spot.

“Same as Crank,” She nods, stepping back, before giving Inez a curious look. “Did you get Juney yet?”

She had not, in fact, gotten Juney yet.

And their bombardier looked like she was about to bite Howard Hamilton’s head off — but Hambone just looked amused with his ability to successfully get a rise out of her. To be entirely fair, it wasn’t hard. And it also wasn’t worth the smack in the mouth he’d be getting if he kept poking her as though she were a sleeping bear; Inez walks a little quicker, Josephine keeping step. Douglass, who’d also been participating in the conversation, catches them first with that pearly-white smile of his.

“Ladies,” it’s an easy greeting, and Inez fixes him with a nod.

June Cielinski looks back at them now, blue eyes lit up, argument on her tongue and jaw clenched. She fixes her gaze on Inez and Inez feels her stomach drop almost instinctually. She’s like a horse being wrangled straight into a pen she wants no part of, because whatever conversation that was just transpiring would be far too much for her to keep up with.

“Eckley, would you tell Hamilton that—”

“We need you for somethin’,” Inez blurts abruptly. She then fixes her look back to the two men behind her and lets out a soft puff of breath. “I’m borrowin’ her.” Josephine slides seamlessly into the conversation with a heard you had a rough landing! that’s laced with all the concern of a mother checking on her kids after a long school day. June, however, is muttering what Inez can only assume are obscenities under her breath. Inez doesn’t speak a lick of polish — her cheeks flush anyway.

“What was that all about?” Inez asks after a moment, and June scoffs.

“Dougie wants to make a pass at Fern so I told him to piss off about it. Hamilton thought it was pretty funny,” June seethes, and Inez knows her immediate piece of advice wouldn’t be much help. Don’t feed into it was like asking June to hold her breath for an entire flight exercise.

She also knows it was less about the prospect of Douglass and Fern, of all people, and more about what lies beneath it — the principle of it. They’d all been sat down and had the fraternization policy nailed into their skulls. Inez figures that it’s hard to take a rule seriously when you’ve never seen the consequences of breaking it. So the guys found it funny, even if, like most things, the consequences felt very, very real for the woman. And most girls understood how words could be dangerous in a way that guys didn’t.

June was always going to be the first one to bat for them. That’s just how it was.

“Should only take a minute, then you can go back to uh… fightin’ the good fight, I guess,” June snorts, unapologetic in the way she rolls her eyes, but Inez knows it isn’t malicious. Her lips curl on something between a smirk and a smile and her physical being seems to loosen up a bit more. That makes Inez relax a bit, letting out a soft breath as they reach the map. “They’ve just gotta know where you’re from. Put a pin in it.” June’s lips pull into a small pout, a nod of understanding.

“Hope you boys don’t need me to point you in the direction of Chicago,” She raises a brow at the two other navigators. Bubbles just laughs, but Croz seems to flush a bit — meek in the presence of June’s sharp remarks as he goes to put the pin in its place.

vi.

“You get lost or something, Cleven?”

It’s never been hard to find her pilot, Captain Savorre’s made a spot for herself by the door just as Major Cleven comes in with a gust of wind. Inez watches Cleven take Savorre’s hand and shake it, and they give each other a smile — Cleven’s is barely perceptible, Savorre’s is mostly teeth. Whatever Cleven says in response, Inez doesn’t pick up on, but Savorre turns her head and Inez follows it.

Inez doesn’t get how she didn’t notice that the horn above the mantle was split in two. Savorre says something else Inez can’t hear, and claps him on the shoulder twice before he walks past. The two of them look like something out of the movies they’d play on base, if she was being completely honest with herself. Tall, confident, attractive. Cleven presses forward, nodding towards those who catch his eye, greeting those he knows.

She didn’t know the commander of the 350th well, but the general consensus of her and most of the girls was that he was quite alright. Harrie had gushed about how pretty his girlfriend was when they saw her once at the bar — all Veronica Lake waves and friendly smiles. Inez was too shy to talk to her then. Still, Captain Savorre and Lieutenant Neumann seemed to like him well enough — that was as much of an assurance as any. Sometimes it was hard to discern who their allies were in a group of hundreds of people.

Inez presses forward once she realizes Savorre is no longer preoccupied, clearing her throat as she approaches.

“Captain?” Savorre’s face lights up in another smile.

“Eckley.” Inez looks to the left, to Buck over by the map, then clears her throat.

“Me and uh… the other navigators were just gettin’ everyone to put a pin where they’re from up on the board. I pretty much got everybody but you and Lieutenant Neumann.” Captain Savorre had an air about her that was somehow both comfortable and intimidating. Inez always chalked it up to her having a good four inches of height on her. But the smile she maintains is a comfort as she straightens out a bit.

“Look at you, making friends,” There’s something about the way she says it that reminds Inez vaguely of her older cousins asking about her social life back in high school. It’s almost sisterly. When Savorre starts walking, Inez is quick to follow. “How’re those glasses working out for you?” she inquires. Inez feels her face flush. The cold metal frames hanging on the inside of her shirt feel heavier.

Savorre picked up on Inez’s habitual squinting pretty quickly. She said nothing of it, but Inez did find a pair of readers on the pillow of her rack in Wendover. She’d thanked the woman at least five times; Savorre just laughed it off, telling her her secret’s safe with her.

“Just fine, thanks,” Savorre nods, satisfied. Then, Inez lets her curiosity get the best of her as they pass by Cleven again in conversation with the Sergeant at the bar. “Everything okay? With the Major?”

Savorre’s mouth curls on a grin, directed ahead of her as opposed to in response to Inez’s question. Inez watches as Savorre drapes an arm around Neumann’s shoulders. She’d been in some kind of conversation with Lieutenant Brady. There’s a quick exchange there: an I’ve gotta steal her from Savorre, a small eyeroll from Neumann and then a small, surrendering nod from Brady that ends with Savorre turning on her heel.

It’s then that the Captain seems to remember Inez’s question.

“Our Air Exec just knows how to make an impression, is all,” is Savorre’s breezy reply, arm still draped around Neumann’s shoulders, who’s giving her an equally questioning look, but saying nothing. “Lead the way, Eckley.”

And so she does: back to the table, with its awaiting map with an ever-growing collection of red pins in places all dotting the U.S. Croz introduces himself all over again and handshakes are exchanged, Inez taking a step back to admire their work. There was something about being unable to distinguish any of them from one another that made her happy. Ten men in a bomber, ten women in a bomber, ten people to fly a B-17, ten pins on a map.

Bubbles puts the one for Neumann somewhere in Pennsylvania that Inez has never heard of. Then Savorre takes one for herself, looks over her shoulder and casts a smile pointedly at Inez as it finds its mark. Like she’s letting Inez in on a secret.

“Motor City,” is all she says as she puts it, presumably, on Detroit — it only then occurs to Inez that their pilot didn’t talk much about where she was from.

Before Inez can ask anymore questions, the door opens once more and Savorre heads off, curious as ever, to see who’s walked in. Neumann’s already ducked back to her prior conversation, and Inez falls into a contemplative, but satisfied silence as Bubbles goes to wave down another pilot. Indiscernable points on a big, big map.

#*poet writes #masters of the air fic #masters of the air OC #mota oc #hbo war fic #hbo war oc #hboww2rewatch

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