#traumatized by memory of it

[ladysophiebeckett]

i remember when i was doing a show in college and we were getting ready, helping each other do makeup and hair. and u know, we're all chatting about stuff and one thing led to another and one woman, older than me by maybe idk five or six years? she got talking to about her husband and how her friend tried to take him from her?? and that she and her husband had broken up various times and we are all looking at her in silence as she is detailing these break ups and her taking him back each time and i think she realized she was saying too much that she tried to wrap it and say 'but we're okay now. we're fine. he's fine'. and we were all just ....'okay that's great as long ur both happy'. we didn't know what to say. we did not know what to say.

#i was like maybe 21 or 22 at the time i think? #she was helping with makeup and she had a history with that man--i think they had a couple kids before they got married #and he also had some kind of issues that she blamed for the cheating instead of just him??? #i wish i could say that she left but i dont know #the last thing i heard was that she moved with him and their kids to arizona and that was years ago #but i remember her face as we were silent listening to her say that kept taking him back #traumatized by memory of it #if youre dating a loser--dump them #if ur married to a loser--leave them. divorce them. #its never too late

[pinktinselmonstrosity]

#enjoying it MUCH more #far fewer traumatic memories being brought back lmao #🧃 #saltburn

[ao3-crack]

(x)

#archive of our own #ao3 stuff #ao3 quotes #archive of our own quotes #fanfic #fanfic quotes #funny #ao3 #oh that brought up some traumatic memories #let’s add more

[agendercryptidlev]

Torchwood gets massive props from me for using the "character gets tricked into thinking they did something terrible and confesses it to their loved one" trope with the loved one instead of freaking out just going "no you fucking didn't. We're going to figure out what's actually going on here"

#Seriously I was cringing so hard expecting some big freak out but then Jack was like 'no you didn't do that's #And he was clever enough to try multiple strategies to figure out what was going on with Ianto! #Like my brother was like 'u can open your eyes now Jack isn't stupid' #Who is stupid is Adam who still tries the whole 'i made them better!' argument on Jack #After making Jack's boyfriend have a traumatic panic attack by implanting fake memories in his head #Like Adam girly just replace his memories of reading the diary to include you and then steal and hide the diary #Torchwood #Jack Harkness #Ianto Jones #Janto

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 79

  When Pariah was awoken from his slumber, he wasn’t exactly expecting it. One was never expecting to awaken when they were supposed to be sealed for eternity after all. He also wasn’t expecting for the reason the sarcophagus was even opened to be a pair of literal infants. A pair of very sick infants.

  One was a newborn ancient for Realms’ sake! Two years dead, if that, and the other- Where was their guardian?! Who had let an obsession get that bad?! How long had he been sealed away that no one had caught an obsession turning toxic and harmful towards a ghostling?! 

  Why was he even sealed inside this area of the zone?! Why had his Keep been moved in the center of one of the zones where ghostlings formed?! He’d never harm a ghostling, but if he’d been any madder (And he knows he had lost it near the end there, that he’d gone too far as he cracked under the weight of the Realms, he’d had an eternity to realize) it would have been a catastrophe! 

  Who has been in charge, the observants!? … What the fuck, that was supposed to be rhetorical! No! They’re good for paperwork but they seem to have failed even at that and- what do you mean they’ve sealed Clockwork away?! 

  The already traumatized Time Primordial who was in this type of area specifically to care for ghostlings, and was now being prevented?! How long has this been going on- No! He’s fixing his realms-damned kingdom before he even thinks about conquering other ones, because who the fuck let it get this bad!

   Pspsps, here little sick ghostlings, he’s trying very hard not to hurt you but you are very tiny and he has been locked away for a long time so please stop squirming…

#danny phantom #prompts #pariah dark #look if the phandom has decided that 100 years is the equivalent of 18 for ghosts #Vlad is like a 3 to 4 years old with a terrible infection and feral out in the woods #Danny is a itty bitty 1 year old *if that* but baby ancients are so rare #like look at Danny's rogues #they're all very modern and like 30 at most #Pariah is the ancient of Darkness #Pariah gets shocked out of his Gonna Go Conquer mode when the first thing he sees is a pair of literal infants who are all sickly #If we wanna go DC crossover part of Clockwork could be Kronos & he was traumatized after getting those memories #Everyone in the know is Pissed at the observants for trying to force a ghost already traumatized by similar things to End a child #He might be behind Pariah getting out without the Observants realizing #Very desperate and hiding this single timeline from them as best he can #DcxDp #DPxDC #If someone tries to summon Pariah they're either going to get a note saying no or the king with like 5 ghostlings on child leashes #vlad plasmius #Vlad masters #danny fenton #ellie phantom #dan phantom #Pariah is screaming because that is 4 baby halfas alone who are incredibly sick #That's not even getting started on the rest of the area who hasn't gotten taken care of thx to the observants #If DCxDP crossover he's going have an aneurism about the Pits and lil baby reaper ghostling Jason #And everything else going on there

[yousaveeveryonebutwhosavesyou]

I HAVE FUCKING NO ONE. I STAY IN MY FUCKING ROOM AND JUST PRETEND. PRETEND THAT MY LIFE IS DIFFERENT, THAT IM DIFFERENT, THAT THINGS ARE DIFFERENT. I DONT WANT TO PRETEND ANYMORE. I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY. I WANT TO HAVE FRIENDS. I WANT TO HAVE PLANS. I WANT TO HAVE MEMORIES. I WANT TO HAVE FUN AND LAUGH AND HUG. I NEED A HUG. I NEED HUMAN CONTACT. I NEED SOMEONE TO CARE. I NEED SOMEONE.

#mental health #mental illness #trauma #bpd #ptsd #traumatized #memories #friends #friendship #pretending #plans #have fun #caring #self love #self care #positivity #depression #anxiety #disorders

[l0ganberry]

I'm going to hell for sure......

#I haven't seen anyone used that so I'll be the first to meme it #suck it #but I do hate myself now that I have this in my camera roll #AFTER BEING TRAUMATIZED ON HOW QUICK THEY KILLED GUMMIGOO #EVEN IF THEY BRING HIM BACK #HIS MEMORIES WON'T BE THE SAME #FUUU #the amazing digital circus #gummigoo #pomni #tadc

[ninjaaa-go]

I was just thinking that, if we do actually get amnesiac Jay, him eventually getting his memories back could be really interesting. Because obviously you’ve got all the great memories with his family and the people he loves, but at the same time just— the horrors. The guy has so much trauma piled up from over the years and I feel like that would be A Lot to have dumped on you all at once.

#like I get Ninjago is still a kids show so they probably wouldn’t lean into that angle much #or realistically they probably wouldn’t even acknowledge it at all #but I still think it’s a really interesting concept #like yeah of course you want the memories of your loved ones and all the good times back #but those also come with just so many traumatic ones #and we’ve seen before that Jay… doesn’t exactly have the best mental fortitude #when situations get really bad he’s pretty much always the first one to crack #like in hunted and crystalized #idk I just think it would be a cool angle to explore #ninjago dragons rising #dragons rising #Ninjago #ninjago jay #jay walker #dragons rising spoilers #dr spoilers #dragons rising leaks

[xenodelic]

There is so much shame that comes with having amnesia and other memory issues.

As someone that has multiple conditions that cause memory loss (DID, TBI, ADHD, etc) we can't even begin to describe the shame and guilt that is conditioned into people who are """forgetful""".

Having memory issues does not make you a bad person. It doesn't mean you are uncaring, lazy, or immature.

Memory is simply one of the many things that people can struggle with. It has nothing to do with who you are as a person. We are conditioned to think otherwise because being "forgetful" makes people less productive to a capitalist society. Society is arranged to make life a living hell for people with memory issues. This is an aspect of structural ableism. People in power do not want people like us to exist because we are less useful to them.

Dont get me wrong - it can absolutely hurt when someone you care about forgets something that's important to you. You're not wrong for feeling upset that someone missed an important date, event, detail, etc. That makes sense and feeling that way is not inherently ableist.

All we ask for is for compassion to be extended to people who struggle with memory. We ask for people to stop assigning moral value to how effective someone's memory is. We desire for social structures to accommodate people of all cognitive functions, not just those who are most productive to a capitalist machine.

And if you are someone with memory issues, know you do not need to be ashamed. We've been conditioned to hold negative beliefs about ourselves and our struggles for somebody else's benefit. Guilt and shame will not resolve our struggles. You are worthy and valuable as you are.

#amnesia #adhd #tbi #traumatic brain injury #did osdd #actuallyplural #memory loss #actuallydid #actuallyadhd

[nabtime]

Okay hear me out. Fenton parenting “i support my son being trans but i draw the line at him being a ghost” type situation yeah? Yeah. So like.

They still vivisect him and all that. But also give him top surgery. Since they’re already there and all.

Do you see my vision

#nap shitposts in the afterlife #danny phantom #like yeah this was a deeply traumatic event for dannny but also. free booblessness. #also like. the deeply complicated emotions around it all like 🤌 #on the one hand. relief at the confirmation they saw him as a boy. even if they stopped seeing him- #-as their son. bc he was a monster. not bc he was trans but bc he was a ghost. which- #-is a whole other can of worms. #so even tho they ignored him when he told them over and over that he was still their son- it wasn’t transphobia #and then there would be the sadness. the fear. the anger. #the anger at everything they took from him in one fell swoop and they didn’t even know. #how was he supposed to be happy about this step in his transition? proud of his scars? content to be shirtless? #he could never enjoy the feeling of going shirtless at the beach. not with the vivisection scars so vivid. not with the ugly memories there #anyway. also i think the concept is kinda funny.

[shearlin]

Hot take about Sky angst, regarding the curse of Demise, because I haven't seen anyone talking about this possibility in all those years I've been in LU fandom.

Guys...

Sky has no idea about the curse

Because think about it. Why would he know about it?

My man has been electrocuted multiple times, with magical - basically divine - lightnings in attempt to defeat Demise. All the while fighting for his life with a literal GOD OF EVIL, after spending an entire afternoon fighting an army of monsters and a Demon Lord/creepy ass Sword Spirit. Not even mentioning how worried sick he must have been that entire time, if this time he was also too late too save Zelda.

(always too late too slow not enough and late late late)

I don't know about you, but I don't think he was in any state of body or mind to listen to some dudes last words, when he had to focus on not passing out because he has to make sure Zelda/Sun is alright.

(It got a bit long so rest of the rant under the cut)

Fi gave him clear, that Demise received a mortal blow and that now it's only a matter of time until he dies and that was all Sky needed to stop paying any attention.

Just go through the motions. His vision is blurry, but that's alright just stay awake. Fi chimes to rise his sword. He does. There is some black smoke suddenly surrounding him, but Fi get's rid of it with her light so it's fine. It's probably why she asked him to rise her skyward. The last fifteen minutes he's been following her directions nearly blindly anyway, because his mind is still foggy, he's not sure where he is or what he is doing he just have to get to Zelda.

And then she's there. And everything is fine.

Impa fades, Fi sleeps and he finally rests. Or rather crashes as the exhaustion finally catches up to him.

But he recovers, as best as he can, and live on.

And then eight other heroes, just like him, appear and take him on a quest across the time. They become friends. Then brothers. Soon he feels like they knew each other their entire lives and can't imagine how he can move on after the inevitable goodbyes.

He is so happy that no matter what, there will always be someone among his people, someone from or even outside of Hyrule, to stand up against evil, no matter how many times it will try to show it's ugly face. He's a bit bummed that there even is a need for a hero to show up, but hey! He is not so naive to think people are and always will be only good. Things happen. Some people are just terrible, and some take it out on the entire world.

But somewhere along the line, he starts to notice... something weird.

They all fought that same guy (some of them even multiple times!) called Ganon or Ganondorf. And while he is overjoyed that none of them even heard the name of Demise, he feels kind of singled out. Few of them mentioned an idea of reincarnation. Mentioning Zeldas' connection through blood of the Goddess and their connection through a spirit.

A spirit of a hero.

He always though it was a figure of speech. A way to describe someone courageous who fulfills the quota of being a hero.

But it's not about a spirit of a hero.

No.

It's the Spirit of the Hero.

His Spirit.

An idea begins to form. A distant memory he didn't even knew he had. Maybe nightmares about that fateful fight starting to get clearer by night. Maybe he spends some time talking to Fi and he does not like the feeling he gets from her chimes, even if she can't really talk in her slumber. Maybe he even prays to Hylia in some distant era in an unfamiliar place, so she can deny or confirm his suspicions.

Goddesses, please, may he be wrong.

Because he loves them all like a family. Because they are family. Because he has seen their haunted expressions and blank eyes, he has heard their stories and horrors they went through and nearly all of them were so young, too young, and the thought that he was the direct cause of it-

Sky had no idea that Demise trapped his spirit in a cycle of reincarnation. He had no time to process it or find coping mechanisms before the adventure with the chain happened. He found out during it, slowly putting it together and coming apart at the seems before their eyes.

Sky didn't know about the curse.

And I say, it could be really interesting to watch Sky fall.

(And if anyone knows a fic exploring this idea please let me know! I searched but couldn't find any)

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu headcanons #linked universe headcanons #lu sky #linked universe sky #some curse of demise rant because I have thoughts #I love sky I promise #I just also happen lo love angst #and sky angst #having a traumatizing moment burn into his memory and haunt his every waking moment is all cool and dandy #but think about the slow realization before it finally hits #my rants

[a-a-a-anon]

absolutely fascinated by young dee who is criminally under-discussed so here is my dissertation on what happened in her college years (ft. dr. gainer, setting her roommate on fire, being institutionalized)/my idea for a fic that I will almost certainly never write/my way too serious take on a few throwaway dee lore lines

timeline background: we know that dee majored in psychology ('charlie got molested') and got "three fourths" of the way in (meanwhile dennis finished his psych minor.) assuming this was a four year program, I'm gonna guess that in her third year she got institutionalized and most likely had to drop out ('gun fever too: still hot'.) we also know that she had her back brace until she was twenty ('underage drinking'), so I'm guessing that means she got her back brace off in her third year.

we know that dennis fancied himself a psychologist since he was young, but I think dee did too. in particular I think she was wary and interested in her brother's psychology; she seems very aware of his psychopathy and bpd in 'making dennis reynolds a murderer' and 'psycho pete returns.' in my head she's been interested in dennis' psychology since they were kids and she saw him snapping crows necks. so instead of forcing her way into acting school, she studied psychology to better understand her brother (and also deep down, herself, who is very much the other side of the same fucked up coin.) it also meant she could tell herself she could study her characters even better when she became an actress.

i think she put in (her version of) genuine academic effort to get in, fuelled kind of by spite (remember the way she studied that thick medical book in 'hero or hate crime' or her very quick math in 'boggs: ladies reboot'). she studies books and gets cricket to quiz her and she still fails to get into penn. but frank always pitied her (i think she was his favorite of the twins-remember "let your sister into the gang", "that's my girl!", "i'm sorry the grift didn't work out, sweetie") so he shells out cash to get her in, but also to get her away from home so he has to deal with her even less.

dennis wants to do anything dee does but better and he wants to keep her close by (to watch her crash and burn, and also because he's weirdly possessive-see 'the gang broke dee' "i'm your select!"). and obviously he's barbara's favorite. so barbara gives him money to get in too. she also gets him into a frat and pays for his classes and his rent and everything he needs. dee has to live in a dumpy dorm with a female roommate.

but college presents dee a chance to moult her previous place in life where she was known as a monster (remember how insistent she was that "people can change!" in 'franks pretty woman'. I think dees always wanted to believe she can shed that feeling she's inferior, but she never has). in my head her female roommate is basically normal-has real friends of her own, mentally stable, attractive-which is exactly what dee craves. dee wants to be popular and well liked and she wants to infiltrate her roommates life, imitate her, be in the Cool group. and she places all her hopes on a friendship with the roommate but dee has never navigated real female friendships before, not with someone like her. deep down she also wishes she found what dennis found in mac, whatever it was, because ever since dennis met mac he's never been as close to her. and i do think dee is some flavor of queer. and the roommate is well liked in the way that dee admires and envies. so there is that blurriness between wanting to be her and wanting to be with her. in my head her roommate looks like the woman from dee's fantasy in 'the gang saves the day' (and they both represent that promise of escape from dee's shitty life).

dee is so desperate for the roommates approval and her love and her life that she goes insane, copying and flattering and competing with her. ever the shitty actress, she tries to emulate her, but comes off as manic and creepy. and maybe her roommate is nice enough to not completely shun her, recognizing that she's struggling. maybe in dees mind they actually are becoming friends when her roommate asks things like "are you okay?"

and dee has to talk about her plan with dennis because he's the only person who would Get It. and she makes it sound like it's almost working. dennis feels jealous and worried and threatened that maybe dee might actually be seen as normal, especially when she gets her back brace off in the third year. so dennis fucks her roommate, more of a show that he owns and controls each and every pathetic part of dee’s life than anything else. and so that dee knows she'll never be as good as him, she'll never as easily charm people as dennis does. (or at least he tells her he does).

to prove that To Someone dee is Good Enough, and so desperate for attention, dee (who's been groomed all this time) enters a sexual relationship with her professor dr. gainer. she tells herself she has the power in it, that she seduced him ("he didn't molest me. i had sex with him 'cause i wanted to.") and she has a mental break, because the thing she told herself held her back from being loved (her back brace) is finally gone by now and yet she still feels like a monster, and the only scrap of "love" she can get is from her professor.

and then she can't take the fact that she can steal her roommates clothes, can emulate her sexual prowess (in dee's own fucked up, delusional way), and still neither be well liked like her nor be loved by her. so maybe dee will always be a monster. so dee tried to burn her roommate in her bed, because she represented the promise of change and popularity, and that promise was a lie and dee's effort was for nothing. and she's institutionalized.

and i think there was kind of a falling out between the twins and their parents, because barbara wants to abandon dee but dennis can't help but visit her. and frank doesn't even step foot in a place that reminds him of his traumatic childhood, and avoids dee even more than he used to because she is his childhood mirror image. so the family becomes even more fractured and estranged.

and maybe dee becomes medicated and slowly crawls her way halfway to normal by the first season (her acting classes are so well-adjusted, taking part in healthy hobbies of her!). until her father comes back into her life and everything falls apart <3

side note, even though dee is crushingly lonely-"I just got a cat 'cause I wanted something to hang out with. I don't have, you know, a roommate or anything, and I don't really have anyone to talk to..."-AND she struggles to pay rent whenever frank cuts her off, i hc that she refused to ever get a roommate in particular female roommate again after this because both her internalized misogyny got worse and she was afraid of what would happen (what she would do) again.

#THIS IS FOR THOSE WITH THE DEE BRAIN ROT WHO SEES HER AS A SHAKESPEAREAN TRAGIC HEROINE WHO JUST WANTS TO BE THE BELOVED COMEDIC RELIEF #also no way in HELL dee was genuinely ever like nice roller rink ep dee. in my head that was the guys absolving themselves for turning dee #even more traumatized and isolated and jaded thru their treatment of her. bc it was obviously a freak accident shes Like That right #(in the sense of like unreliable narrator/faulty memory/lack of any care or attention given to dees life) #dee reynolds #iasip #iasip headcanons #nina.rambles #posts with an audience of me myself and i #tw grooming #tw mental illness #not sure how to tag this! #to me she is the main character. #dennis reynolds #bc there is heavy mention of him too #trash twins #frank reynolds #barbara reynolds

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

The first mission the Court send their newly minted Talon on is an assassination attempt on the ward of one Bruce Wayne… Dick Grayson.

Calvin— can’t kill Dick. He can’t.

He didn’t know it would be the boy he grew up in the circus with they want him to murder in cold blood. He didn’t know— didn’t recognize him until the knife was already at his throat.

But he remembers now. And he won’t do it. Never. Never.

He’ll run. Disappear. Dick doesn’t know who he is, it’s better that way, and if he’s lucky the Court will be too busy hunting him to care about the failed assassination.

Unfortunately for Calvin, Dick does remember; Recognizes the Talon.

And he’s not inclined to let his childhood best friend slip through his fingers again after years of believing him dead.

#IT’S CANON THEY KNEW EACH OTHER #if only because they were in the same circus at the same time #but still it COUNTS! 😭😭😭 #there’s only a handful of fics tangentially featuring Calvin and so help me I will RECTIFY THAT #Calvin Rose #my sweet summer child #expect more prompts featuring him guys #and fics #also Dick totally throws the Talon at Bruce and Bruce’s adoption instincts kick in point blank #like sorry but that’s a traumatized teen and apparently his earliest childhood memory is being kept locked up in a cage like a dog #sorry Bruce you have another kid now #but at least he’s totally on board with your no kill rule! so there’s that #calvin not knowing his friend and new guardian are vigilantes is stressing him tf out #he’s sure he’s their last line of defense against the court #when in reality—- they’re very much keeping HIM safe #they’re hell bent on allowing him a normal life #prompts #dick grayson #batdad #bruce wayne #Batman #robin #Nightwing #talon #court of owls #batfam #I know this is a niche prompt but more people need to hear about Calvin rose #he’s such a sweetheart for real #presumed dead

[hazelnut-u-out]

Somehow never caught this before, but does this imply Birdperson’s mom killed his dad and he remembers seeing it?

The fact this memory is somehow tied to Blood Ridge in his mind makes me wonder if that’s part of why he didn’t accept Rick’s advances— maybe even subconsciously. If that’s what this implies, no wonder he had commitment issues. Makes the shit with Tammy hit differently, too…

I know it’s a throw away moment, but I really hope we get a follow up on that… Regardless of what that memory is, it’s dark shit.

#rick and morty #rick sanchez #birdrick #birdperson #i wonder if he remembers her eyes being red because they were or if it’s a childhood memory thing #because if they are actually red it makes me wonder if there was a whole population of mind controlled birdpeople being used by the GF #at some point #they always go so dark with birdperson’s character #and maybe that’s because he isn’t very expressive #he’s so stoic that it’s silly— but there are these moments that you get reminded ‘no. he’s fucked up.’ #thinking of this he’s probably the most traumatized character out of all of them #jesus fucking christ #sorry i’m feral and adding tags because i NEVER noticed this shit #the things we don’t talk about #the things we bury #the things we hide in an abandoned military vehicle in our memories of war #not going to be able to sleep now bc i’ve got too much of an adrenaline rush from this lol

[ww2yaoi]

#ALRIGHT NEW POLL #i'm traumatized after the last one but we press on #happy memorial day lol #band of brothers #the pacific

[yousaveeveryonebutwhosavesyou]

Suicide isn't selfish because it often emerges from a place of profound suffering and despair. It's essential to recognize that those who contemplate or tragically choose this path are not seeking to inflict pain upon others, but rather seeking relief from their unbearable emotional pain. Understanding this complexity is crucial, as it reminds us of the urgent need for empathy, compassion, and mental health support to prevent such tragedies. Instead of labeling it as selfish, let us strive to offer understanding, support, and hope to those who need it most, acknowledging that their pain is genuine and deserving of our care.

#mental health #mental illness #trauma #bpd #ptsd #traumatized #memories #mental wellbeing #bpd feels #suicide #suicideawareness #selfish #suffering #tragically #path #despair #compassion #understanding #support #empathy #acknowledging