#when i was still in the ICU the doctors and nurses were quite surprised as most of the people in there are old dying people and the young

[agustdakasuga]

A Place Called Home | Chapter 3

Genre: Hybrid!AU, Poly!AU?, Soulmate AU, romance, fluff, humour

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Characters: vet!reader, Arcticfox!Seokjin, Panther!Yoongi, Goldenretriever!Hoseok, Wolf!Namjoon, Calicocat!Jimin, Tiger!Taehyung, Rabbit!Jungkook

Summary: Having saved your own injured hybrid, you were determined to try and help any other hybrid that crossed your path who needed saving. But being a vet in a small hospital wasn’t enough for you. You wanted to do more, you wanted to make a difference. You wanted to give them a home.

You bring Taehyung to the hospital for a check up and Yoongi insists on tagging along. Finally, you sit him down and find out why he has been acting weird the past few days.

“It’s your house, (y/n).” Yoongi crossed his arms, leaning against the wall. You sighed, rubbing your temples. 

“I told you to stop saying that. This is OUR house. You and Jin both have a say in this too. I want to hear your opinions on it.” You leaned back on your hands and stared back at both your hybrids. Jin had remained silent, the arctic fox mainly looking between you and his black panther brother. 

“We just got Jin hyung back. It’s a little unfair to suddenly be getting another hybrid here.” Yoongi spoke. 

“I know. I’m sorry, Jin.” You squeezed his hand. 

“It’s alright, (y/n). I know you just wanna help as many hybrids as possible. Honestly, I’m fine with whatever you choose. As long as you’re happy. But I think we should ask Taehyung what he wants to do.” Jin said. 

It’s true. The tiger hybrid didn’t leave the next morning, to your surprise. He continued to stay and it was his 5th day here. He mainly kept to himself, having small conversations with you and Jin but tried to avoid Yoongi as much as possible. Jin told you it could be a feline territory thing. Luckily, you could count on him when you were at work. 

“What if... I don’t want him here?” Yoongi asked cautiously. 

“Then I would respect that. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable in your own home, Yoongi. I would try to arrange for him to go to a sanctuary or hybrid shelter.” You nodded your head. 

“I don’t know, (y/n).” Yoongi looked away. 

“Let’s try fostering him. If he is open to it, that is. At the end of the fostering period, then we’ll make a decision.” Jin suggested. You gave Yoongi a hesitant look but the panther actually nodded his head to the older’s words. He stalked over and pulled you into his arms. 

“Alright, let’s talk to Taehyung. If he’s alright with it, I’ll bring him in with me for a check up.” You smiled, stroking the space between Yoongi’s ears. The three of you headed downstairs to see Taehyung sitting on the couch. 

“Tae?” You called and his head shot up, ears turning to your direction. The tiger blinked at you. 

“The boys and I have been talking. It has been a pleasure to have you here with us. And if you would like to, I would like to foster you.” You smiled. 

“R-Really? Foster me?” His eyes showed shock. 

“Yeah. I wouldn’t want to force you into adoption right away. At least with foster, I can give you medical care and house you without any legal issues. This will also give the 3 of you time to see if you’re comfortable with one another. Once the foster period is over, we can decide if you would like to permanently be part of our family.” You explained. 

Hearing you say ‘our family’ made Jin and Yoongi’s heart soar. This just constantly reaffirmed that they had the best owner any hybrid could ever ask for. You were a human that lived for the well being of hybrids. 

“Is that okay?” Taehyung turned to the two boys. Yoongi shrugged but nodded while Jin gave a thumbs up. 

“I would like that. Thank you.” Taehyung threw his arms around you to hug you. That caught you by surprise but you smiled softly and patted his back. 

“I’m going to head to the hospital. You’ll have to come with me for a check up and I’ll get your paper work.” You informed. 

“I’ll come with!” Jin raised his hand. 

“I... don’t have classes today.” Yoongi said and you knew that meant that Yoongi wanted to tag along as well. You nodded your head and all of you went to get ready. Yoongi always did a reminder check with you to make sure that you had all your things. He even (reluctantly) sprays your body with a scent mask, which was necessary since you didn’t want your hybrids’ scents to scare off your patients. 

“Let’s go.” Yoongi held your hand and led you to the car. 

“Hey Fran! I’m doing good. How are you?... Yeah, I’m going to be fostering, do you think you could help me pull up the file? I’ll be bringing him in for a check up today... Tiger hybrid, Kim Taehyung... Alright, thank you!” You spoke to your friend and hung up. 

Taehyung looked at you in amazement as you chatted animatedly with Yoongi, who was driving. He had only seen the cold panther smile around you. 

“You three follow Jin and get registered. I’m going to clock in.” You told them. Yoongi and Jin gave you pecks on the cheek. You ruffled Taehyung’s hair and he watched you disappear behind the staff doors. 

“(y/n)! I saw your boys in the waiting room.” Your colleague, Dr Yu, popped her head into your office. 

“Yeah. I’m gonna foster a tiger hybrid so he needs his check up.” You replied, opening the file that the hospital’s adoption agent had dropped off on your desk. 

“No one can beat your heart of gold, (y/n).” Dr Yu sat opposite you as you studied Taehyung’s file. You laughed at her words, not looking up. Taehyung’s file was quite clean. He had all his shots and no serious medical history. It says his old owner passed away. But nothing about how he became homeless. 

“Is Yoongi okay with another feline?” Dr Yu asked. 

“He’s... getting used to it.” You let out an awkward chuckle. One rule was that a doctor cannot conduct a check up on his/ her own hybrid because of a biased incident years ago. 

“Dr Yu, do you think you could...” You started. 

“Thought you’d never ask! Don’t worry, you can count on me.” She took Taehyung’s file, winking before leaving. You wore your coat and started your rounds, already running slightly late. As you walked with both your nurses, you ran into Jin and Taehyung. 

“Where’s Yoongi?” You asked. 

“He said he had to go to the bathroom. We’re heading for Taehyung’s x-ray now.” Jin said and you nodded your head. 

“Anything about the wolf hybrid in ICU 2?” You asked and your nurses shook their heads. 

“We couldn’t find any family in the system but someone comes to leave flowers every day. No one has seen who the mysterious flower sender is though.” Your nurse informed and you nodded your head. The 3 of you made your way to said hybrid’s ICU room. But you froze when you saw someone through the viewing glass. 

“Yoongi?” You whispered. 

“Dr (y/l/n), isn’t that your hybrid?” The other nurse asked. You nodded. With his sharp senses, Yoongi heard you and smelt you. His head whipped to you standing at the door with your nurses. You couldn’t even hide the shock on your face as you looked at him. 

“Kitt- (y/n).” Yoongi acknowledged but you cleared your throat. 

“Check all his vitals and get me an ECG. Take some blood and send it to the lab for the works. We’ll change his dressing as well.” You ignored him and walked to the unconscious wolf. 

“(y/n).” Yoongi called softly. 

“We’ll talk later. Please step outside.” You said, not turning to face him as you used your flashlight to test his reflexes. Yoongi’s ears dropped, flattening against his head before leaving the room. You cleaned the wolf’s wounds, happy to see no sign of infection and a speedy recovery. 

“I’ll send his blood to the lab.” One of the nurses bowed and left. After making sure everything was okay, you took the folder from the end of the bed and opened it. 

“Can you help me key these files in first? I’ll just update this and go to the nurses’ station.” You told the other nurse in the room. 

“Yes, doctor.” She grabbed the stack of folders of the other patients you saw and left. You were left alone in the room with the wolf hybrid. Sighing, you sat on the chair and took your pen out to begin scribbling today’s report on a fresh page. You heard the door open. 

“Kitten.” Yoongi called out to you. You hummed as a signal that you were listening to him. 

“Are you mad? I’m sorry.” He spoke. 

“I’m not mad. I’m hurt you didn’t trust me enough to tell me anything.” You replied. You weren’t lying. Yoongi could smell the disappointment and hurt from your being. 

“You know I have been wrecking my brain to find out whatever I can about him. Where he comes from, how he ended up on the streets, how he was hurt. I don’t even know his name, Yoongi. You knew and you didn’t even think to mention it. You even come in everyday and leave flowers for him.” You let out a huff of frustration. 

“Is this why you have been acting off? You saw him the night we came in to see the lion right? That’s why you were in my office, looking so distraught.” 

“Yes. I saw him that night I was heading to your office. His name is Namjoon. We’re... from the same fighting ring. He was probably hurt by our ring master, the same person who hurt me.” Yoongi revealed. 

“The cut on his abdomen was meant to kill him. That’s how ring masters kill their fighters.” He continued. 

“When you found me 3 years ago, I should have went back to save him but I didn’t. He must have thought I was dead.” Yoongi cursed, guilt filling his system. 

“It’s not your fault, Yoongi. I don’t think Namjoon would blame you too.” You got up and wrapped your arms around him. Yoongi’s body slumped against yours as his tail curled around your waist. The beeper in your coat went off and for a moment, you forgot you were still working. 

“I need to go. Let Jin and Tae know you’re here, okay? Jin would worry that you are gone for so long.” You patted his head, making him purr. 

“(y/n), I know it’s too much to ask but... when Namjoon wakes up...” He stuttered, looking down. 

“Of course, Yoongi. He’s always welcomed to stay with us but bear in mind, that’s his decision to make. We can’t make others conform to our wants.” You smiled softly and squeezed his hand before you left. 

By the time you returned to your hybrids, it was close to midnight. You yawned and dropped onto the couch tiredly. You heard doors opening and footsteps down the stairs. 

“Oh, Taehyung.” You gave a tired smile. 

“Jin hyung’s heat came earlier and Yoongi hyung tried to help. They’re sleeping now.” Taehyung explained, a slightly blushed creeping up his cheeks. You nodded your head, not affected by it at all. It was a natural thing for hybrids to have heat and you were thankful your hybrids could cope with it on their own. There wasn’t anything awkward about it. 

“I have your file ready.” You said, holding up the folder. 

“C-Can I see?” He asked. 

“Of course, silly. It’s your file.” You giggled and patted the space next to you. Taehyung immediately gave you a boxy grin and tucked himself under your arm as you opened the file. He didn’t really understand all the medical words but you were quick to verbally explain things to him. 

“Although, we did find that one of your ribs was broken in a past injury. The x-ray showed a misalignment, which means it didn’t really heal properly.” You showed him the image in the light. 

“Oh...” Taehyung gulped.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” You patted his head. 

“I was disobedient and they would punish me. They said I deserved it for being bad.” He stuttered nervously, ears drooping down. 

“Oh, Tae. No wonder it didn’t heal properly.” You sighed. 

“B-But! I promise, I-I’m not disobedient anymore! Really! I’m a good boy.” He was quick to grab your hands. 

“Tae, listen to me. Listen to my voice. Calm down, breathe, baby. What those people did to you was horrible and illegal. I know you’re a good boy. No one is going to hurt you anymore, I promise. You’re safe here.” You hugged him and he wrapped his arms around your torso tightly, seeking comfort in your radiating warmth. His cries were reduced to small sniffles. 

“I’ll need to wrap your ribs to try and realign them. Is that okay?” You asked and he nodded his head. 

“Let me take a shower first. I probably smell like a thousand hybrids.” You chuckled and shuffled upstairs to shower. Before entering your room, you stopped by Jin’s room to check on him and Yoongi. The two were fast asleep under the covers, making you smile. 

“Come on, baby.” You called Taehyung to your room.

“Lift your shirt.” You instructed, taking the gauze and sports tape you took from the hospital, specifically for him. Turning around, you saw Taehyung fiddling with the hem of his shirt. 

“I... I... There are scars...” He kept his gaze down. 

“It’s alright, Taehyung. Everyone has their own scars.” You smiled, comforting him. Slowly, he removed his shirt. You tried not to gasp at the whip scars on his back. Taking a deep breath, you began to put the sports tape to hold everything in place as you wrapped him up. When you were done, you handed him his shirt and he quickly put it on. 

“I’ll tidy up.” Taehyung watched you put things away. You laid down beside him, yawning. 

“Goodnight Taehyung.” You closed your eyes. He held you in his arms, his orange tail curling itself around your ankle. He made a mental note to ask you about it tomorrow. 

The next morning, you were on call from home so you didn’t have to go into the hospital unless they were short staffed. The three hybrids sat by the kitchen island, eating their breakfast as you fixed yourself a coffee. 

“Iced Americano for Yoongi, hot latte for Jin and tea for Taehyung.” You placed all 3 cups down. 

“Do you usually get called in?” Taehyung asked. 

“Not really. But I do have some papers to go through and reports to update so I’m not completely free today even if I get to be at home.” You chuckled, drinking your iced black coffee. Yoongi placed his plate in the sink and wrapped his arms around you. 

“Unfortunately, I have classes today.” He kissed your cheek. You laughed and stroked his head. 

“Have a good day.” You wished and he gave you another kiss on the temple. He let Jin kiss him on the cheek and ruffled Taehyung’s hair before he left. His actions left you with raised eyebrows but nonetheless, your heart swelled. 

“Plans for today, Jin?” You asked as you washed up. 

“It’s my first day back at the nursery.” Jin reminded. Before Jin went to the institution, he actually worked at a plant nursery, tending to all the plants and learning all about plant care from the old man who owned it. You nodded, remembering he mentioned it to you recently. Jin came and gave you a kiss as well, heading to his room to get ready. 

“Looks like it’s just you and me then.” You grinned. 

“I don’t mind.” Taehyung flashed a boxy smile. With both older boys at their jobs, you were in your room, sitting at your desk with your laptop and report folders around you. 

Taehyung stayed by your side, sitting on the ground, his head in your lap. You would run your fingers through his hair as you were deep in thought. 

“Hmm...” You scratched your head, reading through the patient files. Suddenly, your phone rang, making both you and Taehyung jump. You quickly answered the phone. As you heard the person on the opposite line, you looked down at Taehyung uneasily. 

“I see... I understand.” You frowned and hung up.

“Tae, I don’t know how to tell you this but... They arrested your owner. He is in police custody and you will need to help with investigations.” You explained. Taehyung’s eyes widened in alarm. 

“Please! I don’t want to go back! I can’t! I promise I didn’t do anything, (y/n)! Please believe me!” He got on his knees to beg, tears streaming down his cheeks. 

“I won’t let them take you back, Tae. They just want to ask you some questions. I don’t want you going either but if I don’t bring you in, they’ll come to take you in by force.” You stroked his head. He hugged your torso, crying into the material of your shirt. 

“I’m sorry, Tae.” You didn’t know what to do. Taehyung cried as he changed and got ready. Even in the car, he cried in the passenger seat, his tail curled around your thigh as you drove to the police investigation headquarters. 

“Hi, I’m here to see Officer Kim Jooyeon?” You went to the receptionist, holding Taehyung’s hand. 

“Dr (y/n) (y/l/n)?” An officer headed to you. You had to force a smile and shake his hand. He cleared his throat, seeing Taehyung so distraught, his arms and tail wrapped around you tightly. You stroked the back of his head to try and comfort him. 

“This is his file. We just filed for foster care yesterday.” You handed the officer Taehyung’s paw printed file. 

“Right. Don’t worry, we just need to ask Taehyung some questions as a witness to lock up that man. He will return to your foster care the moment investigations are over.” He explained. 

“How long? He’s still injured and needs to be tended to.” You asked. 

“I can’t give you an exact answer now, I’m afraid. You can come see him as his doctor, I’ll let my boss know. But that’s the best I can do for you now.” Officer Kim said. You sighed and nodded your head. Taehyung had grown so attached to you over the week and he didn’t want to be separated for you so quickly. You cupped his face in your hands, wiping his tears. 

“Hey, baby. Breathe. It’s only gonna be a while. You’ll be home before you know it.” You comforted. 

“I don’t want to see him.” Taehyung cried. 

“You won’t. You will be separated from him.” Officer Kim assured. Kissing Taehyung on the forehead, you left him with Officer Kim and closed your eyes, using all your will power to turn and leave. 

#kpop #kpop series #kpop scenarios #bts #bts series #bts scenarios #bts hybrid series #bts hybrid au #hybrid!au #hybrid bts #bts hybrid #hybrid au #bts hybrid x reader #bts x reader #hybrid x reader #ot7 #ot7 x reader #ot7 hybrid

[ahopelessromantic]

No Grave ➳ S. Reid

Pairing: Spencer x Reader

Word count: 3k

Warnings: mentions of blood, surgery, a gun wound, quite some angst, Spencer and Reader are next level whipped for each other

Is there truly nothing that can get in-between true love? Spencer and you are forced to find out in the most painful way. 

(A/N: I kind of let myself get away with this one, it’s dramatic af lmao. But I listened to Hozier’s Work Song while writing it, so can you really blame me?)

Derek Morgan normally prided himself in having fairly quick reflexes. He had played college football, his rifle scores had always been consistently good, he was able to take down an unsub in less than a minute. But none of that had helped him when a psychotic suspect had shot down his best friend. He had to watch it happen as if it was in slow motion, his voice failing him and not even allowing him to yell out a warning. Spencer had sunken to the floor with a surprised look, blood already beginning to seep through the fabric of his shirt. He coughed weakly and immediately all of Morgan’s attention was on him. Full of worry, he barely even noticed Hotch arriving on the scene and taking down the suspect. “(Y/N).” Spencer spluttered out; his voice hoarse. Now, all of a sudden, everything was happening way too quickly. Morgan frowned in confusion at his friend’s words. “Is that the Unsub’s accomplice? Come on, Reid, stay with me.”, he growled, applying pressure to the gun wound. But he could feel Reid’s body growing limp. “Call (Y/N).” Was the last thing Spencer weakly whispered before passing out.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Emily hummed calmly, placing her arm around Morgan’s shoulders. He took a deep, shaky breath and shook his head. “Then why am I here and he isn’t? Why wasn’t he wearing his goddamn vest?!” He made a move to get up in agitation, but Prentiss pressed down on his shoulder, effectively stopping him. “You know Spencer would have taken it off to negotiate with or without your blessing. And blaming yourself isn’t going to help anyone right now. We’ll know more soon, okay?” He nodded, burying his face in his hands. It had been three hours of surgery already, and it wasn’t looking good for Reid. “Has Garcia found anyone with the name (Y/N) in the unsub’s life yet?” JJ shook her head, watching Morgan and Prentiss with a worried look on her face. “Nothing. Are you sure he said that name?” Morgan was about to snap at her, mad that she dared to criticize his memory at that moment, but then a nurse headed their way. They must have made up an odd group, just a bunch of tired-looking agents draped over various chairs and even the floor. “You’re with Doctor Reid?” This time there was no way for Prentiss to stop Morgan, he jumped up from his seat and towered over the unsuspecting nurse. “Finally, we see someone from your staff! Do you know how long it’s been since we’ve gotten any updates?” The nurse flinched, then regained her composure and straightened up to meet Morgan’s glare head-on. “If you’ve been here for so long already, you probably know that we’re not allowed to give you any information on the patient.” Morgan visibly deflated. “Can you at least tell us if he’s alive?” The nurse sighed, a conflicted look on her face. “Listen, his emergency contact is on its way. Maybe they can tell you more.” With that she disappeared down the hallway, leaving behind a clueless team. “Reid has an emergency contact?” Rossi asked but only got confused faces as an answer. After that, it was back to waiting. Just when Morgan thought he was going to lose his mind; someone came their way again.

You were sure you looked like an absolute mess. You had woken up from a terrible nightmare, and ten minutes later the hospital had called you. Before the staff member had even begun to speak you had already known that something was wrong. Like a madman, you had bolted through your apartment and carelessly gotten dressed. You were sure you had forgotten about half your purse’s usual contents back in your apartment. With some spare clothes and a hot to-go cup of coffee, you had gotten into your car and driven as fast as never before in your life. At some point, you had either switched on autopilot or gone into shock, or maybe even both. It was only in the hospital’s garage that you tuned back in, wondering how you had even gotten there in one piece. Upon seeing your reflection in the elevator up to the ICU you became painfully aware of the fact that you were wearing Spencer’s sweater. And with that, your emotions overcame you, threatened to pull you under like a deathly avalanche. With tears streaming down your face you made your way to the front desk, stating your name as calmly as possible. Your whole body was shaking and after the first whiff of hospital air you threw up into the nearest trash bin. One of the nurses had been so kind as to lead you to a waiting area and explain that Spencer was still in surgery. The people sitting there matched the descriptions of his team members and you weakly smiled at them. “You’re with Spence, right?” One of them jumped up from his seat and nodded, looking at you expectantly. “He’s- They told me he’s still in surgery.” Was all you were able to bring out before you broke down sobbing. A woman with dark hair pulled you into a much-needed hug, and if had you been less worried about your loved one’s wellbeing you would have felt bad about ruining her shirt with your tears. “I’m sorry if it seems insensitive, but I think we all have to ask.” A serious-looking man spoke up once you had slightly calmed down, now sitting next to the kind woman in one of the hospital’s dingy chairs. “Who… are you?” You were still so deep in thought that you hadn’t even heard the question, absently playing with the ring on your left hand. It was a habit Spencer normally called you out on, taking your hand whenever he spotted you doing it. It was also how the team’s glances landed on your ring, their breaths catching in their throats. “I’m Spencer’s wife.” You said with a heavy voice, swallowing down a sob. The team looked like they were about to bombard you with questions, but then a serious-looking nurse made her way over to you. You felt every single muscle in your body tense up. “Doctor Reid is out of Surgery.” For a moment you felt as if you were floating, ready for more good news, but upon seeing the expression on her face you could swear your heart stopped for a moment. “Would you please come with me?” You nodded and got up, your legs feeling like jelly. The nurse led you to the front of a hospital room. “You can go in and see him now, but I have to warn you. Your husband suffered a gunshot to his heart, and although the surgery has been successful, he’s still in a critical condition. He’ll only be somewhat safe once he makes it through the night.” You nodded, and without stopping to think for a moment you stepped into the room. If your heart hadn’t been broken before by the mere prospect of never looking into Spencer’s beautiful eyes again, it would have surely shattered into pieces now. Seeing his lifeless body on the hospital bed filled you with an indescribable ache like someone was physically trying to claw their way through your chest on the search for your now cold heart. The hot tears on your cheeks were the last reminder of warmth in your body, and you quietly whimpered. You sank into the chair next to his bed and felt yourself completely break, burying your head in the hard mattress. The eerie beeping of the heart monitor and the sound of the oxygen tank posed the soundtrack of your demise and for a while, you completely lost all track of time. You had known that his work was dangerous, and you had always been somewhat prepared for something bad to happen one day. You set up as his emergency contact was proof of that, of a partnership whose very essence it was to constantly fear losing each other. But nothing could have ever prepared you for this, sitting next to his pale form and feeling like you had been shot just as bad as him. It didn’t quite want to fit into your head, that this could be it. This could be the last breaths you would ever witness him take and it made you want to scream in pain. If everything had gone according to you, your life with Spencer had been nowhere near to being over. Hell, it had only just started. You gripped his hand, more to anchor yourself than anything. “Spence, baby. Do you remember the day we got married?”, you whispered in a last fit of broken hope. Maybe talking to him would bring him back to the land of the living, bring him back to you. Your wedding had been such a spontaneous decision, and yet, somehow, it had been the best day of your life. You had been speaking about the concept of marriage over breakfast, how commercialised weddings had become over the years, and then suddenly he had looked at you over the rim of his coffee mug and asked you if you wanted to get married today. There hadn’t even been any nervousness in his voice, he had been so certain that this was the way for you two to go. You had laughed at first, asked him if he was crazy, to which he had just retorted that he was crazy about you. “Nothing is going to change anyway. I’m yours and you’re mine for the rest of our lives, right? Might as well save some taxes while being together.” His words had been so profound that you hadn’t even had the chance to say no. So, that day, you in your prettiest sundress and Spencer in his best suit, the two of you had gotten rings from the jeweller around the corner and then driven to the courthouse where you had signed your lives away to each other. Now, sitting next to him in the glum hospital room, all of that seemed like a far-off memory. A sunlit moment of joy in a now so dull seeming world. “Your life is mine, and my life is yours, remember?” You whispered with an aching soul. “My life is going to end with yours and I’m not ready for that yet, okay?” Your voice broke. “I’m not ready to say goodbye to you yet.” You started sobbing again, and at this point, you were surprised you even still had tears in your body left to cry. All night long you weren’t able to get a minute of sleep, your gaze continuously fixed on the rise of his chest. If he was going to stop breathing, you had to be there. A doctor came by to check on Spencer in the early morning hours, looking somewhat hopeful. “He’s made it through the night, that’s good. Your husband is a fighter, Mrs Reid.” You almost hugged the poor guy, so grateful to finally have received good news again. “He should be waking up slowly, once he’s awake we can transfer him to a regular care room.” You nodded and looked back to Spencer, hooked up on various machines and tubes. The shadows under his eyes were dark, and although you wanted nothing more than to see his face full of life again you wished he would just take his time waking up. Normally you always had to force him to go to sleep. The team had been a huge help in keeping you sane, all of them had been camping out in the waiting area, waiting for any kind of news. Of course, you had wished to meet them under different circumstances, but nothing to bring you together like your husband almost dying, right?

Spencer woke up around noon. At first, you hadn’t even noticed it, but then his hand had twitched next to yours and your brain had immediately switched back into hyper-focus. He scrunched up his face, and then with the faintest morning voice ever he mumbled out a quiet “Ow.”. You started laughing and crying at the same time, pressing kisses all over his hand. “Why does my chest hurt?” He grumbled; his eyes still closed. “You were shot in the heart, honey.”, you reminded him, your voice almost matching his. It was then that he opened his eyes and you felt your breath hitch in your throat. You were never again going to forget how beautiful they looked. He weakly gripped your hand in his, his expression still more confused than anything else. “Is that why everything hurts?” You laughed and nodded, leaning your forehead against your joined hands. “I’ll go get the doctor in a minute. But do you even know how much you scared me?” Spencer lifted your chin and looked at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes. “How does that song you like so much go again? No grave can hold my body down, I’ll crawl home to her? You’re not getting rid of me that easily my love.” You breathed out in relief, leaning into his touch. “I love you so much, Spencer.” For a whole moment you got lost in his eyes, and it was there you knew that you were never going to take another moment with him by your side for granted. You were going to hoard them like a greedy madman and hold onto them until age or death would have to pry them from your hands. But then life picked up its normal speed again, doctors came swarming into the room to check on Spencer and you were filled with nothing but gratefulness to the universe for giving you more time with him, more time to make memories for your collection.

With a smile on your face, you watched the team spill into the room, all of them looking more than happy to see your husband alive. It had been two days since the surgery, and the nurses had only now given Spencer the clear for visitors again. Morgan sat down across from you, punching Spencer in the shoulder as gently as possible. “That’s for almost dying on me, and for not telling us that you’re married! We could have notified her much sooner, man.” Spencer had half a heart to look guilty, distracting himself by playing with your wedding ring. “You guys know how dangerously close Unsubs sometimes get to us. (Y/N) is all I have; I couldn’t risk her ever getting hurt. It’s got nothing to do with you, I promise.” Emily crossed her arms, looking down on Spencer in feigned anger. “Well, that’s good because we really happen to like your wife. She forced us all to sleep while she was waiting for you to make it through the night.” Spencer’s eyes met yours and you basked in the warmth flowing through you. He already had a cheeky grin on his tired face again. “Why does that sound so familiar?” You chuckled and rolled your eyes, gripping his hand even tighter. There was no way in hell you were going to remove yourself from his side during the next few weeks. After a few days he was cleared to return home, and you couldn’t wait to have your home feel like just that again. Home just wasn’t the same without him.

“Sir, you have absolutely no business still looking this good after getting shot in the heart.” Spencer laughed in surprise, shoving his wet hair out of his face. He had taken his first shower by himself today, finally able to fully move his arms again without ripping the stitches open. “Honey, I haven’t worn anything but hoodies and sweatshirts since getting back from the hospital.” You could see the familiar blush on his cheeks he got whenever you complimented him, and it filled your chest with warm honey to see him like that again. “Still. Being alive suits you.” He rolled his eyes but smiled nonetheless, getting into bed and patting the empty spot beside him. “I know it’s early, but come sleep with me?” His painkillers made him constantly tired, but you’d prefer a sleepy cuddly Spencer over a Spencer in pain any day. “Like you even have to ask.” You giggled, turning off the lights and cuddling up next to him. “I know it’s a weird question.” You spoke into the darkness after listening to your husband’s calm breathing for a while. “But when you were on the other side… did you see anything?” You could feel his chest vibrate with a half-hearted chuckle next to you. “Go to sleep, (Y/N).” You shook your head and further curled up into his size. “I’m gonna need to hear you breathing for at least thirty minutes more before I’m able to fall asleep.” He took a deep breath and started drawing circles on your skin through the fabric of the ratty old MIT t-shirt of his that you always slept in. “It was just… lonely. And cold. So cold. For some reason, I knew you weren’t there. So I decided not to stay.” You tried to wipe away the tear that had snuck down your cheek as discreetly as possible. You had expected many answers, but nothing quite like this. “God, I love you.” You whispered with a trembling voice. Spencer turned to fully face you and caressed the side of your face. “I love you too. More than you can even imagine. But you should sleep now. I’ll still be here tomorrow, I promise. I’m never letting go of you again.” You nodded and snuggled into your pillow, a hand on Spencer’s chest. “Are you… checking for my heartbeat?” Eyes already closed, you giggled. “Shhh. I’m not letting go of you again, either.” With that, the two of you fell asleep. Spencer hadn’t lied to you. He was still there the next morning, and every morning after that as well for many more years. No matter how dangerous life became, he was always going to crawl back to you and you to him. No graves could hold your bodies down.

#requested #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer x reader #mgg #Matthew gray gubler #Matthew gray gubler x reader #BAU #BAU Team #BAU x Reader #derek morgan #criminal minds #criminal minds oneshot #hozier

[wizkiddx]

worst case scenario part 3

umm so, never ever intended it to be this long but here we are. again this is v dark so please please read the warning!! also [and obvs] this is very medically inaccurate and just a work of my head aha

[part 1] [part 2]

warning: mentions of death / hospital / mentions of childhood abandonment too- please don't read if this could affect you <3

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His heart was thundering in his chest, so much so it drowned out all other sounds making all the doctors words fade into the background. Conciously, he really was trying to listen to what the doctor was saying; consciously he knew she was trying to prepare him to see Y/n; consciously he knew she knew he wasn’t okay. But really? It didn’t matter, and as they drew closer to his fiancé Tom felt an urgent sense of relief purely know she was there. She was there and she wasn’t dead…yet. 

Only two people were allowed to go up, just because the nature of the ward - everything was meticulously controlled, including the comings and goings of visitors. If you’ve never been in an ICU it’s a pretty hard environment to describe. Really, it’s just another hospital ward, with capacity of about 20 beds. Each bed has much more equipment surrounding that the average and a nurse is stationed per patient, monitoring every possible variable that the machienes are measuring, so any trend (either positive or negative) can be identified at the earliest point. Though in everyones head, it seems as though ICU is a common place ending up for some unfortunate sod when something bad happens, it’s actually really rare for someone to be so ill and dependant on medicine to maintain normal body functioning. Only the most severe trauma, infection of the most dangerous microorganism, surgery of such high stakes normally make an appearance on the ward. And ,on average, between 8-20% patients that are admitted to an ICU never make it out. 

And those grim figures were unignorable to anyone. As soon as you walk through the doors, the atmosphere is intense and ineffable. It’s not spoken, but is so incredibly morbid it makes anyone shiver. 

Dom felt this, squeezing his sons shoulder as he followed Tom and the doctor, just a pace or so behind them. Having offered to go with Tom, whilst Harrison took Nikki to see the baby, Dom was now feeling just as clueless as his son did. Except he was actually listening to what the doctor was trying to warn them about and it scared him. The three, made it to the door and with a swipe of her ID card the doctor admitted the Holland men in. Gratefully, none of the staff took any notice of who was walking in, they were much too busy for that - Dom was incredibly relieved, had someone recognised Tom when he was in this state, god knows what would’ve happened.

The doctors pace was with purpose, perhaps so that the two couldn’t spend too long ogling the other patients in the beds - who all looked almost unhuman with the amount of tubes and wires coming out and into them. But then, she slowed up, halting infront of a bay about 5 or 6 down the ward. Spinning on her heel and with a subtle nod to momentarily release the nurse from her post at Y/n’s bedside, to give them a bit of privacy, she looked at the two men. 

“You can touch her, just be gentle with the wires.”

Shellshocked and terrified, Tom was frozen those 2 metres away from the bed barely able to see her face over all the equipment. Yet undoubtedly, it was his finance’s delicate visage lying on the white pillow, with a thick white mouthpiece and tube covering her mouth and stuffed into her nose. Not able to move, both Dom and Dr Goodwell sensitively waited - it was an adjustment to say the least, seeing someone you knew so well look so different. With quiet tears starting to roll down his eyes, Tom eventually started to inch toward the bedside, taking his time to try and absorb everything of this frankly ridiculous situation. He couldn’t get over how, even considering it all, above her nose it just looked like Y/n. Like she was asleep in their bed, eyes closed as if she had once again  fallen asleep infront of a random Netflix movie Tom had bugged her enough to watch in bed. And it was, ever so slightly comforting. That was still her, that was still the love of his life lying there. And she was still alive - which given the last few hours, was enough. 

Reaching the bedside, Tom naturally reached out and stroked the top of her head delicately, pulling into place a few rogue strands that seemed to have a mind of their own - she had always hated when her hair got frizzy. The picture had Tom’s mind casting back to their first holiday, a serene if quick few days in Fiji-  though Y/n didnt know this , that holiday had been one of the most important times in their relationship for Tom. Until then, given the nature of his job, the couple had only ever managed brief periods together. They spent time together as and when they could in between Tom’s busy schedule but it was never as long as they’d like. Somehow though, he’d managed to squeeze a few days away to surprise Y/n with the trip. 

It was everything he’d ever hoped it would be and more. In fact it was then Tom was oh so sure he would be spending the rest of his life with her. This thought crossed his mind on the last morning, when he had for once woken up before Y/n - her head mere cms away from his on the pillow. Just like now, her hair had been all over the place and her sparkling green eyes locked shut. Contrastingly though, in Fiji the sight had made him smile softly; now it just made him cry again. 

“Would you like a minute alone Mr Holland? We will just wait outside?” Not even turning round to properly respond to the doctor, Tom just nodded violently, not taking his eyes off his fiancé - waiting till he heard his Dad and the doctor leave the bay; then the curtains be completely drawn to a close, before he shakily cleared his throat to whisper.

“Hey darling… you um-you’ve scared me shitless today… and… and I’m supposed to be the dramatic one in the relationship.” Chuckling wetly, Tom clasped his other hand in Y/n’s - still mindful of the IV port coming out of the top of her wrist. Not that he was expecting any sort of response, yet the lack of her squeezing his hand back still had his heart sink. “Look I…I love you so bloody much and I really need you to get better okay? You’ve never listened to me before but I really am begging you to now, I just.” Swallowing thickly, he shut his eyes momentarily and delicately rested his forehead on hers - his touch feather light. Just needing to feel her. “I just really need you and I really love you., okay?” 

Unsurprisingly he didn’t get a response. The rhetorical question hung in the air alone, safe the mechanical whir of the ventilator and various chimes of the machines and monitor, till his Dad came in. Grasping and squeezing his shoulder lightly, Dom provided the stimulus for his son to unfold from over the bed, standing upright, as both men just took in the sight of Y/n lying there for a minute or two. 

“I need her Dad. I-I-“

“I know Tom.” Speaking so quietly it was barely audible, Dom’s eventual agreement at what Tom was saying was in a way a relief. Haz and his mum had both either been saying or implying that they would be okay no matter what - which came from a good place but was so infuriating. Because god forbid, if this situation got worse Tom knew it wouldn’t be okay. Nothing would ever be okay again. So his Dad’s simple acknowledgment meant a lot, causing Tom to turn round and embrace his slightly shorter father. 

Dr Goodwell silently watched the exchange for a short while and once the men eventually pulled away she stepped forward to give some more information. She went through what all the biggest and scary looking tubes and wires were doing for Y/n, before explaining the next steps. 

“Now as I said before we are sedating her at the moment, while we wait and see if she gets any complications from the surgery that are better treated while she is asleep. By this afternoon we will have a clearer idea and by that point we may choose to withdraw that sedation. It’s important that you are aware though that she might not wakeup immediately. Sometimes some people that have suffered similarly to your fiancé will be unconscious for a while in what I’d presume you’ve heard of as a ‘coma’. Now it’s not as dramatic as you see on TV shows, it’s just Ms Y/l/n’s brain giving her body a chance to recover. It’s often a longer process, which I know is something you don’t want to hear, but I have to be honest.” The doctor was stern but in a softer and from-a-caring-place. “These patients are suggested to possibly recover quicker if they have a steady support network behind them, which it seems like she does. That means that you need to look after yourself so you can help her sir, especially in what could be a long process. It’s not going to be helpful for Yn if you’re killing yourself trying to be here all the time… It seems like Y/n already has quite a big group of you here for her, so please remember you’ve got all of her care team here and everyone else to help you too….Does that make sense sir?”

“Tom” His Dad, in a gentle but firm warning tone, urged Tom to speak and to listen. Properly listen. 

“Yeh… I-yeh It’s just all a lot right now.”

“Of course… and we promise that if anything changes with her condition, you will be phoned straight away. You are welcome to stay as long as you want - the only rules are two at a time, no flowers, sign in and out and then sanitise your hands pretty excessively. If you need anything, Ms Y/l/n’s nurse will be your first port of call.”

“Thanks for everything” Dom nodded in a gracious manner, which the doctor seemed to massively appreciate - apparently, for the job they do not receiving a hell of a lot of thanks. 

“I’ll pop back in a little bit.”

And for a couple of hours everything everything felt like a bit of an anticlimax, nothing happened, not a lot changed. Just Tom and Dom sat next to Y/n’s bed in silence; Harrison and Nikki downstairs with the baby, till Dom got a phone call from Nikki asking them to meet at the neonatal unit  - which was limited by visitor numbers unlike the ICU. Thinking it’d be simple, the elder man gained Tom’s attention with a call of his name, explaining they should go down to meet up. 

“I’m not going down there.”

“Son, I know you’re worried by Y/n isnt going anywhere right now. The doctors said they’d call you if anything happens.”

“It’s not-“ Tom stopped himself, biting his tongue and looking away from his Dad. “I just don’t want to go down there.” Slowly, Dom was more and more realising Tom’s thought process and honestly… it scared him. In the hopes this was just a big misunderstanding he offered a different option - hoping Tom would equally refuse that. Dom suggested going down to the cafe instead, which most unfortunately Tom agreed to. It wasn’t leaving Y/n that was the issue, it was being near the baby. 

Tom’s daughter. Unnamed and apparently abondoned by both parents. 

Anyhow, Dom resigned to playing into Tom’s choice, perhaps Nikki and Harrison would be able to swing him round, to see sense. It still took Tom getting the nurse to triple check they had his correct number on record , just in case, before Dom could tear him away from the bed. Fortunately the pair found a quiet and secluded corner table, where Tom was still yet to be recognised, while Nikki and Haz found them too. 

What followed was Tom answering all his mum and Harrison’s questions about Y/n’s condition, in a blunt and emotionless manner - without Tom returning fire by asking any questions at all about his beautiful little baby girl. Eventually Nikki braved it, someone had to bring it up. 

“Well it sounds like littles going to change for a while… maybe you should head home for a bit? You’ve been up half the night and you look shattered love. You don’t have to go back to yours… you could stay in your old room for a bit?” Tom being by himself at the moment sounded like the most incredibly stupid idea ever, Nikki was offering it as a choice - when in reality there was only one option.

“Maybe later this evening I will? Just don’t want to leave her alone yet.”

“It’s already 7 love, you’ve not eaten all day, you got to look after yourself too.” Harrison and Dom sat awkwardly while Nikki tried to delicately encourage Tom into what was the only sensible plan, watching him nurse the small hot choclate in both his palms. Time really had lost all meaning at this point, for him it felt both years since he’d first arrived with Y/n and at the same time barely 10 minutes ago. It felt weird. 

“We can take shifts? If-if you want someone with her I mean… I don’t mind staying for a bit longer if it means you head back to your parents.” Harrison really truly didnt mind, in fact he sort of wanted to. He wanted to see Y/n’s face definitely alive, wanted to feel reassured by the monitors. Shockingly, Tom slowly nodded his head, surprising everyone with his lack of argument. None of them could work out whether it was a good thing him not putting up much arguement ; either he was heeding everyones advice of taking care of himself - or he had just given up. Harrison, as much as he didn’t want to, was favouring the latter. 

“Okay” Nikki declared optimistically “So maybe you and Harrison go up so you can say good night to Y/n, then we can all go and pick up the baby?” She opened the plan to the floor, allowing for input but got nothing - except maybe Tom’s jaw unconsciously tensing uncomfortable at the latter part of her statement. Dom noticed. 

Not one noticed but knew what it meant. His son blamed his granddaughter. His son, right now in that moment, hated the unnamed and totally helpless baby girl. 

part 4?

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #dad!tom #tomholland #tom holland angst

[supernaturalfreewill]

Words: 5,232 Sister!Winchester Reader x Gabriel Warnings: violence, intense scenarios, violent imagery A/N: So... once upon a time I was writing two series at once... Mess Is Mine and Fangs and First Impressions. And I said to myself, "Self, we are never going to write two series at the same time again! This is stressful!" And yet, here I am today, already writing two series (The Wrong Bed, Sam x Reader which is almost done! and Even in the Darkest Heart, a Demon!Dean series) and now I'm being dumb and chucking in a third. This was supposed to be a One Shot but as we've already established on this blog I am apparently incapable of writing short fics. So HERE YA GO! New Series. Don't ask me how many parts it will be because I literally have NO IDEA. :) But having a steaming slice of Gabriel, straight out of the oven.

Your name: submit What is this?

White. Clean, blank, pure white. That was all you were aware of suddenly. It was blindingly white and as you sat up and then pulled yourself to your feet, you saw that it was like an expansive room, painted in the color of freshly fallen snow, unmarred by any track or trail. All was pure white.

“Hello?” The only answer you received was the lonely echo of your voice, so distorted by the time it bounced back that it was almost unrecognizable. Where the fuck am I? you wondered. You started to walk, but as everything was the same, the sensation of moving was unaccompanied by any visual cue that you actually were moving. This was so unsettling and disorienting that you ceased your tentative steps quickly. Your heart started to race a little faster and a disturbing thought popped into your mind. Am I dead?

_ _ _ _ _ _ “I need a large bore IV, wide open. And up her oxygen percentage. Her numbers are tanking!”

“Sir, you really have to stay back. Sir! You’re not allowed beyond these doors!”

Dean watched helplessly as your unconscious body, straddled by a doctor with their hands pressed firmly down onto your abdomen, was hurried through a pair of swinging doors, flanked by an army of medical personnel. Dean finally registered the nurse in front of him and stopped before he collided with her outstretched hands. “Where are they—”

“They’re taking her straight into surgery. Are you next of kin?”

“Yes—My brother and I. She’s our sister! I need an update! As soon as you have one!” Dean urged.

“Do you give us permission to perform life-saving actions like resuscitation if necessary?” The words came out in a fast tumble and Dean didn’t even process them before he answered.

“Yes, goddammit! Do whatever you have to—she has to be okay!”

“We’ll let you know as soon as we know anything,” The nurse turned and ran down the long hallway, the swinging doors closing finally behind her. Dean paced a tight circle, a bundle of nerves and rage.

In about 20 minutes, Sam came running up and spotted Dean collapsed in a chair in the little seating area, endlessly bouncing his knee. “Hey—what’s going on? They wouldn’t let me leave—I almost punched out a security guard,” he said desperately. Sam had fresh stitches in his forehead and he was developing quite the bruise around one eye.

Dean let out a heavy exhale. “They rushed her right into surgery.” Dean rubbed a hand over the stubble on his chin. “Are you okay?” he asked, finally looking up to inspect Sam’s stitches.

Sam collapsed into a chair beside his brother. “Fine. They said the concussion is probably mild. Nice to be numbed for stitches for once,” he said, but his eyes kept darting back toward the doors and he was wringing his hands. “Did you hear anything yet?”

“No.”

The Winchesters sat in a heavy silence for almost two hours before a doctor came out.

_ _ _ _ _ _

You were becoming so anxious by the lack of anything and the horrible thought in your head that this was it, this was dying, that your heart was absolutely racing in your chest now. Sitting still didn’t seem like a good option, but the thought of trying to move again through all that blank nothingness seemed just as bad. “Hello?!” you yelled once more, this time as loud as you could.

“Hi there.”

You jumped with a startled gasp and spun around, one hand on your chest out of fright and surprise. There was a figure there. He had a small, warm smile on his face and his irises seemed to blaze golden and light brown. It was strange—you felt an overwhelming sense of calm as you looked at him. Your heart rate had slowed to its usual pace and you no longer felt that bubble of rising panic in your chest, threatening to burst. You were keenly aware that in your profession, a seemingly kind face didn’t necessarily mean anything—and yet, he had somehow stopped your wounded whirling.

“Who—who are you?” you asked, finally able to recover from your surprise and find your voice.

His smile widened on one side, curving up in a crooked half-smirk. “Well… I suppose you can call me your guardian angel,” he said.

Your brow only furrowed down in confusion. “Where… are we?”

“Difficult question to answer. We’re nowhere and yet, in some sense… kind of everywhere to you right now.”

The wrinkles on your furrowed brow deepened. “Am I—am I dead?”

He threw his head back and laughed heartily, while you merely looked on in perplexity. “Now, what kind of guardian angel would I be if that were the case?” he asked you. He suddenly stuck a hand into his pocket and pulled out a large Twix candy bar, bouncing a little unconcernedly on his toes. He opened it and took a big bite, before meeting your eyes again.

“I’m sorry—but who are you?” you asked again.

He let out another small chuckle and you watched as the corners of his eyes crinkled this time in a broad smile, but he still didn’t give you an answer.

“If I’m not dead, what exactly is happening?”

He tilted his head a little and looked at you for a long moment. “Do you remember that man in the bar?”

And suddenly it was like you were there—sensory overload. You could hear the drone of the music in the background and smell that heady scent of beer… And there was the man. You saw his face clearly, and now you saw that he had been watching you.

“I see him,” you said, and suddenly you were back in the white space. “Saw him.”

The figure nodded. “Well, he wasn’t just a guy in the bar.”

Now, you tilted your head a little in an unspoken question and your eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

“He was the thing you were hunting. And he figured out that you were hunting him.”

As soon as he said it you heard a crack like thunder and a flash like hot, white lightning. Your body jolted and there was a searing pain in your stomach. You looked down saw an expanding circle of dark crimson on your shirt, and when you pressed a hand to it your fingers came away stained bright red, sticky with blood. Now when you looked back up at the figure he wasn’t smiling anymore and there was no sign of the candy bar or wrapper. He raised two fingers and snapped, and the searing pain disappeared along with the scarlet stain on your shirt.

“Sorry about that,” he said. His voice now was lacking the playful lilt it had before. It was soft and serious. “That can happen from time to time. Reality leaks in a little bit.”

Suddenly, you understood and then you remembered. You had heard his footsteps behind you, first at a distance and then quickly, running. You had turned and then… the crack of the gun going off and echoing in the lonely parking lot—the flash of the muzzle. More gunshots, must have been Sam and Dean shooting back—they had been ahead of you going to the Impala. But you were already on your knees, bleeding, clutching your stomach and struggling to see anything through the searing pain.

“He shot me,” you said.

“He did,” the stranger said.

“But I’m alive?”

“Yes.” A long silence stretched where you both just looked at each other, and you were reeling from the implications.

“So, is this real or all in my head?” you asked him.

He smiled again, just a small one, and it lit fireworks of light off in his eyes. They were mesmerizing. “Why can’t it be both?” he asked. “We’ll be seeing each other again. I promise.”

“But—wait!”

_ _ _ _ _ _

Sam and Dean both jumped to their feet when the surgeon came out through the swinging doors and eagerly ran to meet her.

“Y/N is going to make it,” she said. The brothers both heaved huge sighs of relief. Sam crumpled half over and put his hands on his knees, forcing in air. Dean shut his eyes and clenched a hand into a fist. “She’s very, very luckily to be alive. The bullet lacerated her liver and she lost a lot of blood but it missed her hepatic artery by mere millimeters. If that had been hit, she would have bled out in minutes,” the surgeon said. Sam straightened back up stiffly and exchanged a look of horror and desperation with Dean. “She’s in critical condition and we will keep her in the ICU until she is more stable, but she’ll be okay. Thank goodness you two got her here so quickly,” the surgeon said.

“Thank you,” Dean said forcefully.

“Yes, thank you so much,” Sam added. The surgeon nodded and headed back through the doors. The Winchesters stood there in silence after the doctor left until finally Sam broke it.

“That was way too close,” he said.

Dean swallowed hard at the lump in his throat, but it wouldn’t lessen. “Way too damn close,” he said, his voice breaking a little. He wandered back over to collapse into the chairs. Sam sank down next to him and glanced over at his big brother.

“At least the shifter is dead,” Sam said. “Yeah. But we still have to deal with the cops,” Dean growled. “Afterall, we did kill someone in a parking lot…”

“There was surveillance at the bar. It was clear self-defense. We have nothing to worry about,” Sam reassured him.

“Well, not nothing,” Dean said. “You know what a pain in the ass it is going to be trying to keep Y/N from doing anything to heal up?” A faint touch of a smile reached his eyes as he looked over at Sam.

He nodded. “She is a Winchester.”

_ _ _ _ _ _

You were finally moved from the ICU, and Sam and Dean snuck in early, even before visiting hours, so they could be there when you woke up. Sam had a huge bouquet of sunflowers on his lap and Dean had brought your favorite herbal tea. You woke up slowly, still a little foggy from all the painkillers, but you immediately sensed the two figures in your room. Sam noticed you stirring first.

“Hey,” he said sitting up. His voice was soft but you could hear the smile in it. “You’re awake,” he said, climbing to his feet and coming to stand beside your bed. “Brought you something to brighten up the room. I know they’re your favorite,” he said, setting down the huge bouquet on the side table.

You blinked heavily a few times and managed a weak smile at him, “Thanks. It’s good to be up and have my room brightened,” you said. You put your hands down on the bed and tried to sit up a little more but immediately winced and hunched over, a hiss of breath drawn in through your teeth, drawing concerned looks from your older brothers.

Dean was immediately at your other side. “How are you feeling?” he asked. His voice sounded extra gruff to your ears, and you knew it was likely due to worry.

“I’m doing well for someone who has staples holding their guts in,” you said dryly, a small wry smile creeping onto your face. Neither of your big brothers laughed. “Oh, come on! I’m kidding!”

Dean swallowed at the lump and tightness in his throat again but it didn’t abate. “Really though? How’s your pain?”

You shook your head. “I’m fine. Really. You can stop giving me those classic Winchester furrowed brows. I’m okay. They have me on the good drugs,” you added with a small smile. You noticed the paper cup clutched in Dean’s hand. “Is that for me?”

“Oh, yeah. Your favorite tea.”

You grinned at him and accepted the cup. “Thank you.”

Sam sighed heavily beside you, and you could sense your brothers exchanging a glance. “Listen, Y/N…” Sam started. You lowered the cup from your lips and looked at him.

“Stop,” you said holding up a hand. “Before you say anything else, I need to say something.” You struggled to find the words. You wanted, no—needed them to hear every word you were about to say. “This is not your fault,” you said, deliberately turning your eyes to Dean and catching his green ones. “I mean it. This was bad luck. It could have been any of us. I was just the slowest walking to the Impala. My legs are a lot shorter than yours,” you joked. “Alright?” A heavy, thick silence held the room in suspension, feeling like a stifling summer evening heavy with humidity. “I mean it. None of us saw this coming. It isn’t anyone’s fault except the dickhead who shot me.”

Sam was staring at your face and you caught his eyes, which were a little sad and glistening more than they should have been for the light. “We’re your big brothers though,” he said. “We’re supposed to protect you.”

“We thought we lost you,” Dean said.

“But you didn’t,” you retorted. “And you did protect me—you saved my life. They said if you had waited for an ambulance I might not have made it.”

Dean’s jaw clenched and you watched the muscle in it twitch. “Did they tell you?” he asked you, his green eyes holding yours—and you saw fear there, something you rarely saw in his eyes—not that it was never there. He just never let you see it. “Millimeters and it wouldn’t have been fast enough.” You looked down at your hand on the comforter of the hospital blanket.

“Yeah, about that, actually…” you started. Sam’s brow creased even more in the middle. “There’s something else that happened I need to tell you about.”

“What is it?”

“I think while I was in surgery—or maybe even before, I don’t know for sure—but I saw something,” you said, wrapping both your hands around your paper cup again, soaking in the warmth of the tea.

“What do you mean?” Dean asked, apprehension growing with every word your spoke.

“It’s kind of hard to explain. I was in this pure white room… and at first there wasn’t anything there. It was just empty but then this… figure appeared.” Your brothers watched your eyes grow a little distant.

“A figure?” Sam repeated. You looked up at him and nodded.

“I asked him who he was and he told me that I could call him my ‘guardian angel’,” you said, now looking over at Dean and trying to read his reaction. His face seemed to darken and you watched the muscle twitch in his jaw again.

“It was probably just your brain trying to process what was happening to you,” Sam offered. “You almost died. The mind does crazy things when the body is in shock—trust me, I know,” he said sincerely. “And so does Dean.”

You shook your head. “No,” you said, vehemently. “It wasn’t that. It wasn’t. It was real. I’m telling you; it was—” you sighed heavily, not even knowing how to explain without sounding stupid. “—it was happening in my head but this figure, I don’t know… There was something about him. I think he really exists,” you said.

“Did he say anything else?” Dean pressed you.

“I asked him who he was and then I asked him where we were and he said something like, ‘We’re nowhere and yet, in some sense everywhere.’ Whatever the hell that means,” you said, fiddling with the sleeve on your hospital gown. You hesitated, knowing the next question you asked would be hard for your brothers to hear. “Um. And then I asked him if I was dead… and—it was the strangest thing. He laughed and he made some joke about it.”

“He made a joke? What the hell?” Sam repeated.

Dean shook his head. “What kind of joke?”

“Like, ‘oh, how good of a guardian angel would I be if you were dead?’ Oh! And it gets weirder… then he reached in his pocket and pulled out a candy bar.”

Now, Dean and Sam both straightened up involuntarily and looked at each other long and hard in some kind of silent communication. “What? What is it?” you asked. “Come on. Don’t do the silent, telepathic thing. I hate when you do that,” you said.

Sam swallowed hard. “What did this figure look like?” he asked.

You tried to call up an image of him in your mind, and as soon as you shut your eyes you could see him as clear as day. “He has sort of warm brown hair. It’s a little shorter than yours, Sam, kind of swept back. And he has these—these eyes that look like they’re golden brown or amber. A little stubble on his face and he has this cheeky sort of little smile…” You opened your eyes again and looked at your brothers. Their expressions made it quite clear they knew exactly who you were describing.

Dean ran a hand over his face and licked his lips. “You said he pulled out a candy bar?”

“Mhm. I wouldn’t get that detail wrong,” you said.

Sam shrugged and his eyebrows lifted. He shook his head, a little disbelieving.

“What?” you repeated, looking between your brothers. “Who is it? What’s going on?” You were met with stony silence again. “If you two don’t tell me right now I’m going to climb out of this bed and if my stitches rip out it WILL be your fault!”

Dean sighed heavily again. “Alright! Alright! Calm down, turbo!” You sunk back against your pillows again. “Yeah, I think we know who you saw. But—I mean—” Dean looked to Sam who shook his head again, apparently having no explanation. “It doesn’t make any sense.” You gave a questioning look.

“We knew him. Before we knew about you. It was definitely not your mind inventing this, but—he’s dead as far as we know,” Sam said.

Now it was your turn to gulp at the tightness in your throat. “Dead?” you repeated. Sam nodded.

“Yeah,” Dean said. “It’s complicated.”

You laughed sardonically and let your head fall back against your pillow, feeling suddenly tired. “Isn’t it always with us?”

“You’re tired. You obviously need to rest so we can talk about this later,” Dean said, putting a hand gently on your shoulder.

“What?! No! You’re not just gonna say that and expect me to be able to—to sleep!” You looked between your brothers in annoyance. “I’m serious! Cough it up! If you think I’m giving the two of you time to concoct some bullshit cover story you have another thing coming.”

Sam closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Alright. Just—relax. We don’t need you getting all worked up… You remember that trickster we told you about? Way before we found out about you?”

“The one who made you watch Dean die over and over again?”

“Yes, exactly,” Sam said.

“…Wait, you think that figure I saw was this—this trickster? That’s way too powerful for a—”

“He wasn’t a trickster,” Dean interrupted. “He was an archangel playing at being a trickster.”

Your jaw dropped open. “What?”

“Gabriel. It was the archangel Gabriel,” Sam said. You stared at him like he was insane. And then you looked over at Dean, who was refusing to look at you and instead staring, brooding, at his boots, chewing on his lower lip.

“Pardon my French but fucking--Gabriel?? THE Gabriel?”

Sam nodded. He could see your mind starting to spiral. “Whoa, whoa, whoa—he said he was my ‘guardian angel’. You don’t think he was being serious, do you?”

Dean shrugged. “We don’t know. We don’t even know if he’s back. He’s supposed to be dead. Sam and I basically watched him die. Besides, just because he said something like that doesn’t mean anything. He loves goofing around,” Dean said, and you heard some bitterness still in his voice.

“I don’t think saving my life is goofing around,” you retorted.

“We don’t know for sure that he did that,” Sam said. “We need to be careful here. There could be some other agenda. I mean, he was dead. So, if he is actually back that is a big enough mystery right there to warrant being concerned. Resurrections tend to have a catch.”

“I didn’t even know archangels could die,” you said, a little sadly. “Why did he—?"

“He died to save Dean and I,” Sam said. You let out an exhale in an audible rush of air. “Y/N, did he say anything else?”

Now you couldn’t think. Your mind was spinning. You pressed your palms over your eyes. “Umm, yeah he—I asked him if I wasn’t dead what was happening and he walked me through the shooting. The guy in the bar… the parking lot—” you suddenly shuddered and your eyes flew wide open. You pressed one hand over your incision.

“You okay?” Sam put a hand gently on your arm.

“It was like I was there. I could see everything as if in the actual moment. I saw the man in the bar watching us. I heard him running up behind me when we were in the parking lot. And then I could feel it again…” You trailed off and the room stayed silent for a long moment, each of you grappling again with how close to true disaster and devastation you had all come. Sam reached out and grabbed your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“But he just snapped his fingers and it was gone—the pain and everything.” You looked over at Dean. “I heard more gunshots—after I was shot. Did you and Sam—?”

Dean nodded solemnly. “We got him. He’s gone.”

That answer was weighty. You were glad that he was gone, but you wondered about the implications. “Are you and Sam going to get into trouble? I’m guessing there is an investigation and—you killed someone. What if—” Dean smiled fondly at you and chuckled a little. “Are you really worried about that? You almost died, and you’re worried about Sammy and me dealing with the cops? It’s all taken care of, okay? There were surveillance cameras in the lot. They caught everything. It was a clear case of self-defense. Don’t worry.”

You nodded and let out a relieved sigh. “Good. That’s really good. Who is going to wait on me hand and foot if the two of you are in jail?” you joked.

“Y/N,” Sam said, his tone again serious. “What else did Gabriel say?”

“Right. Umm, I asked him what was happening if I wasn’t dead—if it was real or all in my head. He said ‘Why not both?’ and then he told me—” you suddenly remembered his last words to you and the beeping on the heart monitor increased to match the rushing of your heart. You gulped. “He said we would be seeing each other again. What do you think that means?”

Sam shook his head and looked to Dean, whose face was stern and serious. “I don’t know.”

“Do you think it was really Gabriel?” you asked. “I mean, it could have been something else pretending to be him, couldn’t it?”

Sam rubbed a hand over the center of his chest, where a tightness seemed to be taking hold. “I don’t know. We don’t know. But you should get some rest now. Dean and I will look into this, okay?”

They both kissed your forehead and made sure you were comfortable against your pillows before retreating to the hallway, hoping that you would take their advice and get some sleep while they investigated.

Dean pulled out his phone and pressed the speed dial number for Cas, who was back at the bunker. Cas answered on the first ring.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, hey. Sammy and I are just leaving the hospital.”

“How is Y/N?”

“Well, you know, as good as can be expected. She seems to be in good spirits though.”

Cas breathed a sigh of relief into the phone. “Good. That’s very good news. I feel so… useless,” he said a little quietly.

“I know,” Dean replied. “But there’s nothing to be done about that right now. And none of this is your fault.” There was a beat of silence where Dean guessed Cas was still wishing as hard as he could that he would somehow magically regain his angel mojo. “Hey, listen, though… there does seem to be something else strange going on…”

“What do you mean?” The angel’s voice immediately deepened with worry.

Dean ran a hand back through his hair. “Y/N said when she was unconscious that she had some sort of dream or vision or something. She is fairly convinced that it really happened.”

“Okay…” Cas’s voice was uneasy.

Dean quickly related the whole story to Cas with as much detail as he could remember, but purposely omitted the key moment—the candy bar. “This figure claimed to be her guardian angel.” “Well, that is odd because the human idea of a ‘guardian angel’ is quite rare in actuality. Only a very, very small number of humans would ever be given that kind of special protection and they would have to be very important.”

“Right. But we asked her to describe who she saw and guess who it was?”

“Dean, you know I don’t like guessing games—”

“Frickin’ Gabriel. The archangel.” Dean waited for Cas to say something but the line was quiet. “Cas? Cas, are you still there?”

On the other end, standing in the front room of the bunker, there was a very good reason Cas was silent.

“Hello, brother.”

Standing before him was the very being Dean had just mentioned.

“Oh, why don’t you just go ahead and tell Dean-o you need to call him back.”

Cas was so shocked that he gulped and did just that without thinking.

“Cas, wait! What’s—” Dean let out an annoyed sigh and Sam’s brow contracted low over his eyes.

“What was that?” he asked.

“I don’t know. Cas just hung up on me all of a sudden. He sounded weird,” Dean mused, frowning down at his phone. He redialed Cas’s number but it simply rang and rang.

Back in the bunker, the angel stared in shock at Gabriel. “Wow. What exactly have you done to yourself, brother? I mean, I was never a big fan of the trench coat but even that was better than this,” Gabriel said with a grimace, taking in Cas’s sweatshirt and jeans. “Yikes. But, I’ll admit I do kind of dig the scruffy look you’ve got going on with the beard.”

Cas’s dark eyebrows were casting a heavy shadow over his cobalt eyes. “Gabriel… How—how is this possible?” he asked, stepping back slightly. “You’re supposed to be dead.”

“Well, I was dead. Dead as a door nail. But—then, all of a sudden, I wasn’t,” he said. He walked casually over to the table and hopped up to sit on it.

“What—” Cas gulped anxiously. “How?”

“Beats me. Dad up to his old tricks again if I had to guess. I was given some specific instructions though…” he added mysteriously.

Cas didn’t say anything and just studied him. He seemed to be quite the same Gabriel that Cas remembered. “What were they?”

“Oh, come on, Cas! You never did have much flair for the dramatic. You really think I’m just going to sit here and tell you? No, no, no… especially when you’re the only one here…” he said, glancing around. He jumped back down onto his feet. “Listen, don’t bother calling those flannel-swaddled jawlines back—first of all because your phone is broken—”

Cas glanced down at the screen on his phone and it was cracked and did not light when he pressed the button on the side. He gave the archangel an annoyed look.

“And second of all, because they will know when it’s time for them to know. Which, by my calculations, will be when they get back here in three to five days once Y/N is able to leave the hospital.”

“Dean said she saw you when she was unconscious or… dying,” Cas said. It was hard even to get the word out.

Gabriel smiled. “Did he now? How interesting, don’t you think?”

Cas was getting irritated with him for playing coy. “Enough, Gabriel. Did you save her life?”

He pointed to himself. “Did I? Y/N had some sort of vision of a mystic figure? Sounds like a classic near-death experience to me. Who’s to say if it really happened at all?” He smiled serenely at Cas again. “Where is Y/N’s room? This way?” he asked, pointing down the hallway. Cas frowned at the question but Gabriel only took off in that direction.

“Gabriel,” Cas called after him, rushing to catch up. “I don’t have my grace but you do. Why don’t you go heal Y/N now?”

Gabriel gave Cas a doubtful look. “Yeah, I’m sure that miracle would go completely unnoticed by the hospital staff… Look, brother, as much as I would like to simply go and fix her, take away all the ouchies, I can’t yet. Y/N is going to have to wait until she’s released.”

Despite his usual playful tone, Cas thought he saw real concern in his brother’s eyes while he spoke of you. “Well, is it true?”

Gabriel was continuing his hurried walk down the hall, poking his head into every room to see if it was yours. “Is what?” he asked carelessly over his shoulder.

“You told Y/N you were her guardian angel!”

Surprisingly this stopped him in his tracks and he turned to face Cas, his lips pressed together into a thin line. “Castiel, you know how rare that is. I mean, they hardly exist. Only a handful over all the millennia,” he said softly. There was a strange light in his eyes and Cas studied his expression carefully.

“That didn’t answer my question.”

And in response to that, Gabriel only smiled.

Part 2

#gabriel fanfiction #gabriel x reader #gabe fics #archangel #supernatural fics #reader insert #spn

[mamabearcatfanfics]

Instinct - Chapter 5

I’m posting this a little early, but I need to take my youngest to the park, attend the Inuyasha Book Club meeting, do laundry ready for the school week and finish writing other things, and I didn’t want it to get forgotten in the general Sunday madness!

You can read it on AO3, or continue on below 😘

Kagome did her best not to panic as the ambulance door slammed shut. She tried to listen to the slow deep voice of the paramedic explaining what he was doing, slightly muffled by the surgical mask he’d donned as soon as Inuyasha had laid her down on the bed and jumped down out of the ambulance. The paramedics hands were steady, his voice calm, and she tried to focus on watching him as he wrote down numbers on a chart and twisted dials on equipment .

Mama’s hand reached out to stroke her leg over the white sheet that had been pulled up to her waist, and Kagome closed her eyes, concentrating on the familiarity of Mama’s soothing voice and touch in the jarring interior of the brightly lit ambulance. But she felt adrift without him.

Strange as it may seem, she’d come to take comfort in the predictability of Inuyasha’s abrasive personality. It had taken her a while, but over the emotionally charged months that they’d spent together, eating, sleeping, laughing, fighting, she’d worked out that it was all a front. It was hardly surprising really, that he would build up emotional armour in response to his hard and lonely childhood. But he’d begun to gradually let that front slip as the trust between them built, at first offering grudging friendship, and now she hoped, something more.

Over these last few days as he’d cared for her, he’d allowed his true personality to shine through, and he’d become her lifeline, her one point of stablity in the pervasive fog of pain and fever. Inuyasha had promised he’d follow, and he never broke his promises. That was the only thing holding her together. Because she’d heard the second paramedic say the name of the place where they were going – the hospital where her father had died.

 She’d been seven – a happy little girl with no concept of how cruel life could be. Her father was late coming home from work, and all she’d been concerned about was whether he’d arrive home in time to read her a bed time story, because he did the voices better than Mama. But the familiar sound of his key turning in the lock never came. An unfamiliar knock on the front door at that time of night was jarring, breaking the usual evening family routine. It had surprised them all.

 When Mama opened the door, instead of her father’s smiling face there had been police, their faces sombre. They said there had been an accident. Mama was crying. Grandpa had stroked Mama’s arm while she stood behind them, unsure of what was going on. She tried her best to cling to Mama’s waist, but Mama’s stomach was now so full of her yet to be born baby brother that she couldn’t make her arms meet. The kind police lady had tried to take her hand, but she didn’t want a stranger, she wanted Mama and Papa. Mama never cried and Kagome was terrified.

 The police had driven them to the hospital, and she’d sat on the back seat, squashed in between Mama and Jiji, holding their hands tightly, the city lights going past in a blur. She hadn’t known what to think, what to say. There had to have been some kind of mistake that would be cleared up when they got there.

 They were told that they’d only be allowed in the ICU ward for a few minutes. The ward had felt alien, like another planet, the large open space filled with machines and curtains and beeps and whispers. Strangers with masks passed by them, with shoes that squeaked on the grey rubber flooring. The room stank of bleach, reminding her of when Mama had to clean up after Buyo’s little accidents when he was a kitten.

 Jiji had held her hand tightly as they walked past other patients, telling her softly that she must be careful not to touch anything, and that she had to be brave. She wanted to be brave, wanted Jiji to be proud, but she was scared, more scared than she’d ever been.

 And then they’d stopped at a bed at the end of the ward. She hadn’t wanted to believe that man in the bed was her father. He was completely unrecognisable, his chest and one arm covered in dressings and bandages, with more bandages wrapped around his head. He had tubes coming out of one arm, and a plastic mask with tubes coming out of it over his face. He wasn’t wearing the clothes he’d left the house in that morning, or the watch Mama had got him for his birthday.

 Mama’s shaking fingers had reached out to stroke the man’s unbandaged hand, so softly, like she was worried he would break more if she wasn’t careful. But that couldn’t be right. Her Papa was strong. Strong enough to throw her high into the air at the park. Strong enough to pick up Mama and whirl her around the kitchen until she giggled. Strong enough to help Jiji lift heavy things onto high shelves in the store room that she couldn’t even move.

 She’d told her mother quietly but clearly that the police had made a mistake, and they should go home. This was some other little girl’s Papa, and her Papa would be home any minute, wondering where his dinner was.

 Then her ears were filled with the frightening sound of her Mama’s anguished voice calling out Papa’s name. Nurses came running, drawn by the sudden beeps and alarms of the machines near the bed. Jiji had picked her up and taken her out of the way as she cried out for Mama, taken her back through the big room and down a narrow corridor.

 She’d sat with Jiji in a waiting room that smelt like sadness, with a tv that only showed one channel. There was a toybox, but the toys were all for babies. She flicked through a half filled colouring book that sat on a little table for something to do while they waited for Mama, but the crayons in the plastic tub next to it were all broken, with most of the pretty colours missing.

 It wasn’t Mama that came to get them, but a doctor. He’d asked them to follow him to a little room close by, refusing to answer Jiji’s questions until they’d gone inside and he’d shut the door. It was a small depressing space, with faded artwork hanging askew on the wall, empty apart from a few chairs and a table with a box of tissues on it. Mama was already there, crumpled in on herself like crushed paper, her face buried in her arms to muffle the sound of her crying.

 The doctor had said he was sorry, but there was nothing they could do – Papa’s injuries from the car accident had been too severe. The words had whooshed over her like an icy breeze. She didn’t want them to be true, and she’d frantically looked at Mama and Jiji’s faces in turn, wanting one of them to say that the doctor was wrong. How could those words be true, when he’d patted her on the head just this morning, and told her to do her best at school? Told her that he hoped she’d have a good day, and he’d see her tonight?

 But Mama was still crying, her hands reaching out blindly for them both. Jiji had turned and collapsed onto the chair next to Mama, his own face ashen. Then he’d picked her up and rocked her on his lap, even though he usually said she was getting too big to be cuddled like a baby now that she was almost a big sister.

Shocked tears had begun to pour down her cheeks, even as she felt Jiji’s tears dripping on to her neck, and Mama’s soft hands pulling her legs to rest on the small amount of lap she had left, stroking her softly as she tried to comfort her with broken words. And then she knew it was true. Papa was gone. It had been an accident, but that accident had taken her Papa away as surely as if someone had killed him on purpose.

Now they were going back to that same hospital ten years later, and she didn’t know how she felt about that. Part of her felt like that same petrified little girl, stepping into an unknown world. It was so hard to focus. Her mind was swimming, the constant fight for air was making her feel panicky, like she needed to run away. And her chest hurt so much lying down. She tugged on the paramedic’s arm weakly, trying to sit up.

“Is your pain worse when you’re laying on your back?” he asked, making adjustments to the bed when she nodded. “Sorry about that – I didn’t quite get the bed set up properly before your boyfriend carried you in. We’re nearly at the hospital Kagome-san. Deep breaths – let the oxygen mask help you.” Her brain tucked the word ‘boyfriend’ away to think about later, when she wasn’t struggling to breathe.

The ambulance pulled to a stop and the back doors opened. Someone helped Mama step down, and she was startled when the paramedic clicked a safety belt across her waist and her bed started to move, jolting her slightly as the legs extended to the ground and locked into place. Everything was a blur.

Large sliding doors swished open and she was wheeled into a small room, unable to see everything from her position on the bed. A nurse was taking her temperature, taking her blood pressure, talking to Mama and the paramedics, asking her questions, but she couldn’t answer, her breath wheezing behind the mask on her face.

The urge to run grew even greater, so much so that she half sat up and tried to swing her legs off the bed, but the belt still around her waist held her back. The nurse tried to restrain her arms gently, telling her to be calm, that she was safe. But she didn’t feel safe at all! She wanted to leave. A feeling of claustrophobia swept over her as she struggled to free her arms, her chest heaving as her body tried to breathe and cough at the same time. And then his voice cut through the static fogging her brain.

“Kagome. It’s gonna be okay sweet girl. Deep breaths, remember?”

People were arguing in the background, commenting on Inuyasha’s lack of mask and shoes, and Mama was saying something, trying to smooth things over, but none of that mattered to Kagome. He’d promised he’d be there and he was. Her hand shot out to grasp his fingers tightly, and she lay back weakly on the pillow, no longer struggling to run.

“Inuyasha…”

“Promised I’d be here didn’t I?” Kagome nodded, taking in gasps of air behind the mask, squeezing his fingers, her eyes locked on his. Inuyasha stroked his thumb over her wrist. “You gonna be good and take your medicine?”

“Please don’t leave again”, she wheezed, her eyes filling with sudden tears.

“Keh. Wasn’t plannin’ on it.” His other hand reached up to smooth her fringe back, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear, his face and voice a point of calm as the medical professionals bustled around her. “Just lay quietly, that’s my good girl. I’m here, and I’m not goin’ anywhere else.”

💕

Inuyasha’s nose twitched behind the surgical mask they’d insisted he wear. Even though he disliked the feel of it against his face, it actually blocked out some of the scents that had irritated him so much when he first arrived, making him feel like he constantly needed to sneeze. Besides, they’d said if he wanted to stay in the hospital room at Kagome’s side it was essential, so he put up with it.

Mama had tied the strings on the mask on for him, over the top of his bandana, and had somehow found some hospital slippers for him to slip onto his feet, because apparently him being barefoot was also an issue. They were now both sitting beside Kagome’s bed, watching her as she slept.

His heart was full of gratitide. Thankful for Mama, who had made it clear to the healers that he was family and she wanted him to stay. Thankful that she had somehow found a way to explain things to him without making him feeling totally useless and stupid. Thankful for the medicine that was allowing Kagome to finally sleep, a proper sleep for the first time in days.

She’d been asleep for a few hours now. The nurse kept coming in and poking and prodding her, making him want to snarl at them to leave her be, but her eyes remained closed, her breathing still congested, but steady. Her face was still pale under the breathing mask, but it had finally lost that expression of constant pain and panic that had made him feel frantic over the last few days.

He really hadn’t paid much attention as Mama had spoken to the doctor after they’d got the results of all the tests. The phrase ‘viral pneumonia’ meant virtually nothing to him, but they’d said that Kagome was responding to the medication, and would probably start feeling better in a few days, seeing she was young and healthy, providing she took her medicine and allowed her body to rest and heal.

Before they’d given her the sleeping medicine, a nurse had come in to show Kagome how to cough effectively to help get rid of all the mucous in her lungs, and to show him and Mama how they could help her. Kagome had told the nurse proudly that Inuyasha had already been doing that for her, her eyes glowing as she gazed at him, and he’d felt his heart swell and his cheeks flush as all three women gazed at him approvingly.

He’d quelled his sudden urge to smash the window and leap out of it to avoid the sudden unwanted attention, but only just. He understood it would cause problems for Kagome and Mama and it wasn’t worth the momentary reprieve from the embarrassment. He was proud to think that what had come to him instinctually had actually been helpful, but that didn’t mean he wanted people talking about it, and looking at him.

“Inuyasha?” Mama’s voice was gentle and quiet, and had lost that sharp edge of panic that it had contained ever since he’d come through the well and told her that Kagome was ill, and he was glad.

“Mmm?” he replied, his eyes never leaving Kagome’s sleeping face.

“Now that Kagome is resting comfortably, I was thinking of getting something to eat from the cafeteria downstairs before it closes. Will you stay here with her for me? I could bring something back for you to eat if you like?”

“Course I’ll stay.” He thought for a moment. “Do ya think they’d have ramen? Or those po-ta-to crunchy things in the crinkly bag?” Mama stood, reaching for her handbag with one hand and stroking his shoulder affectionately with the other.

“I’ll see what I can do. I won’t be long. Don’t go roaming around the hospital while I’m gone, okay?”

“Feh. I'm not goin' anywhere. Why would I leave Kagome unprotected like that when she’s asleep?” He reached his hand out to stroke Kagome’s fingers resting on top of the blanket, so softly, like he was worried she would break if he wasn’t careful. Mama made a small sound behind him, and he turned his head curiously. The paper mask on his face seemed to be messing with his senses, because Mama’s scent seemed to be both sad and happy all at once.

“I’m so glad she has you Inuyasha” she said quietly, with a little hitch in her voice. And with that she turned quickly, moving out of the room and down the corridor.

“I’m glad I have you too.” Kagome’s voice was still raspy, but her eyes were clear, and he could see her smile beneath the plastic mask.

“Oi. You’re meant to be sleepin’. Quit talkin’ and close your eyes.”

“I’m awake now.” She tried to pull herself upwards, reaching for the strap that hung over the bed, but Inuyasha was too fast. In moments he’d helped her sit up, letting her lean forward against his strong arm while he tucked pillows behind her back like he’d seen the nurse do earlier.

“Thank you Inuyasha. Thank you for looking after me.” Her fingers stroked his hand, then twined their fingers together, her thumb caressing his wrist. She was looking at him with so much emotion in her eyes, he could hardly stand it.

Out of habit, all the usual words to push any contact away popped reflectively into his mind, but they stuck in his throat, and he swallowed them down. He didn’t need them anymore. Not with her. Not with Kagome. He tipped his head forward so their foreheads were resting against each other.

“I’ll always look after you my sweet girl, because you are precious to me”, he said softly, his fingers squeezing hers. But then he pulled back, grinning behind the paper mask, his eyes teasing. “That don’t mean you can slack off when you’re better though. You’ll have done more than enough layin’ around by then.”

Her sudden giggles turned into coughs, and it was second nature by now to help her, easing her mask off her face so she could cough up the phlegm. Even her cough sounded easier since she’d had that special medicine that went through the breathing mask.

He’d made the right decision, bringing her back through the well to her mother. If she’d stayed in his time, like she wanted to, he wasn’t sure she would have made it. His gut churned at the thought making him feel sick to his stomach, and he pushed the horrible images that came to mind away quickly, not wanting to waste his time on them. Kagome was right in front of him, and was going to recover. She was okay. Everything was going to be okay. He breathed out a sigh of relief, but she’d already noticed the fleeting change in his expression. She always noticed.

“Inuyasha?”

He stroked her cheek, taking the chance to feel the soft skin under his fingers before he had to put the medicine mask back on her face, and shook his head.

“Ain’t important.”

“Yes it is, if it makes you look like that! What’s wrong?”

He sighed, dropping his hand down to caress her fingers, unable to look at her face.

“You could’a died Kagome. If you were livin’ with me in my time with this sickness, with no way back through the well, you probably would have. And I wouldn’a been able to do a damn thing about it!”

He drew in a ragged breath, his heart beating fast, his youkai instincts rising at the thought of what he was about to say, snarling at him, but he pushed them back. This wasn’t about him. It was about Kagome’s safety, and he would always put her first. He stared at her hands as he gathered his courage to say what he wanted to say; they were so much smaller than his own. He couldn��t risk her.

“Kagome… when all of this is over, when we’ve found all the shards and beaten Naraku, I… I think it would be best for you if-“

“Don’t you dare!” she said, her eyes incredulous. “Don’t you dare say that I should stay apart from you! When I promised to stay by your side Inuyasha, did you think I didn’t mean forever? Did you think they were just pretty words?!”

He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “No, but… I nearly lost it when I thought you were gonna die Kagome, and I-.”

“News flash Inuyasha! People die in this time too! Look at my mother – her and Papa were so happy together, and he died. Modern medicine couldn’t save him even though we loved him and needed him. Does that mean everyone should keep apart from the people they love? Should we both be unhappy just because something bad might happen? Huh?!”

Inuyasha worriedly tried to soothe her with his hands, stroking her shoulders but she shrugged him off, her eyes snapping even as she took deep gulping breaths of air.

“No! It means the exact opposite! We should hold onto people we love so tightly, because we never know when they might be taken away. We should cherish every moment! I love you Inuyasha! And if you think I will let you push me away-“

Another coughing fit stopped her tirade, and he rubbed her back, getting ready to place the mask back over her face. The machine next to the bed began to beep faster, irritating him. She pushed his hand away, and he growled.

“For fucks sake, just hold on, would ya? I know ya wanna yell at me, but you can’t do that if ya can’t breathe stupid!” he huffed, securing the mask back over her face. “Just concentrate on taking deep breaths. That’s it. That’s my good girl.” Kagome’s eyes filled with tears, and he brushed them away gently with his thumbs, but more kept coming, and he gazed at her with a heartbroken expression, blinking away tears of his own.

“I didn’t mean to make you sad Kagome. It’s just… watchin’ you be so sick – I’ve never been so scared. It made me realise that I couldn’t lose you. I just couldn’t. And I thought, if there was some way that I could prevent that sickness happenin’ again, even though it would hurt me so much to let you go, I just…” He gulped, unable to go any further, swallowing his own emotions as he brushed his thumbs on her cheeks.

She closed her eyes breathing deeply for a few moments. “Being apart from you would hurt me more than anything else”, she whispered, panting as she spoke. “Please don’t pull away from me now, not when we’re so much closer. Please.”

He whined at the heartbroken tone in her voice, desperate to fix it. Mama’s voice spoke softly behind them.

“Kagome is right you know. No one knows how much time we’ll be given with those we love. It’s very easy to take that time for granted.” She moved quietly into the room, sitting down on the chair next to Inuyasha. Her voice was serious, but not sad.

“But it sounds like you two won’t ever do that. And it also sounds like you still have time to be able to make decisions about what happens after your quest, however long it takes. But whatever happens, it’s important to make those decisions together.”

Inuyasha sighed and nodded, dropping his hands away from Kagome’s face to grasp her hands in his. He wished he didn’t have the stupid paper mask on so he could kiss her fingers.

“Alright”, he muttered gruffly, sniffing quietly. “One thing at a time, wench. Let’s just get you better first, huh?”

Kagome gave him a watery smile, almost hidden by the breathing mask. She squeezed his fingers tightly, as if to show him she wouldn’t be letting him go in a hurry.

“Alright.”

💕

Inuyasha walked slowly and carefully along the thin dirt track, worn through the grass by years of villagers footsteps between the village and the Bone-Eaters Well. He leaned forward a little, not wanting to dislodge his sleeping cargo.

It had been just over a week since he’d carried Kagome back through the well in that desperate dash from Kaede’s isolation hut, and today was the first time he'd brought her back to his time. She’d only been out of hospital for two days, and even though her health was much improved, she still got out of breath easily and tired quickly.

She’d had a short visit to school this morning, just enough to see her teachers and pick up assignments for her subjects. Her mother had taken her, and he’d waited at the shrine at their insistence, sitting in the branches of Goshinboku and fretting about being apart from her.

All his senses were constantly attuned to her now – smelling her scent to make sure the illness wasn’t returning, listening to her heartbeat and breathing, needing to be close by so he could see that she was okay and reach out and touch her. He knew he was smothering her a little, but he couldn’t help it. Last night he’d sat outside the bathroom while she soaked in the tub, on alert just in case she dozed off in the water, and she’d almost tripped over him when she came out.

She’d understood his constant monitoring of her to some extent, but she was beginning to get a little exasperated at him. He was pretty sure if he kept it up, there’d be a solid string of ‘osuwari’ commands in his immediate future. But he couldn’t help it – she’d been so ill and still wasn’t quite recovered and probably wouldn’t be back to her full stamina for some weeks yet, and it brought out every protective instinct he had.

When Kagome and Mama had returned from school, Kagome had the bright idea of coming back to see the others, to show them she was okay. Her mother had agreed that a quick visit should be fine under Inuyasha’s watchful eye, even though he’d wanted to veto it, but he’d been helpless against Kagome’s pleading. It seemed he was turning into a spineless lap dog every time Kagome turned those persuasive blue eyes his way, and he wasn’t entirely upset about it.

Even though Inuyasha had been popping backwards and forwards through the well daily to keep everyone informed about Kagome’s progress, her arrival had provoked much excitement. Her friends had been delighted to see the physical proof that Kagome was on the mend.

Kirara and Shippou had burst out of Kaede’s hut the moment they sensed her drawing near, Kirara winding herself around Kagome’s ankles in greeting, and Shippou bouncing about more like frog than a fox. It was only Inuyasha’s warning growl that he would take Kagome home again if he couldn’t be calm around her that had settled the tiny kit down.

Kaede had welcomed them both into her home with warm smiles and the offer of tea. Sango had pounced on Kagome with a delighted hug, eager to talk and reconnect with her best friend, and Miroku was there with a grin and a brotherly pat on her shoulder, pleased to see her looking so much better.

They had visited with everyone at Kaede’s hut for an hour, Kagome chatting happily with everyone, but the moment she had yawned Inuyasha had been insistent on taking her home again.

Shippou had clung to her tearfully, but she’d assured him that Inuyasha would bring her back again tomorrow, and she’d stay longer. Her promise of a treat had probably helped dry his tears also, Inuyasha thought. He snorted. Shippou was nothing if not predictable.

A gradual increase in the speed of Kagome’s heartbeat had him looking over his shoulder as she stirred back to wakefullness, rubbing her cheek against his shoulder. He watched her yawn out of the corner of his eye, and smiled as she rested her chin on his shoulder, pressing her soft cheek against his.

“Oh look, how pretty!” she said quietly, mindful that her mouth was very close to his sensitive ears. “Do you think we can stop for a little while?” She pointed over to the grassy meadow near the well, which was currently filled with pink and purple cosmos flowers, swaying in the gentle breeze, and dozens of butterflies flitting about in the bright sunshine.

“I dunno”, he grumbled. “You’ve already been out all morning. This has been a busy day for you – ya only got outta bed for the first time the day before yesterday.”

“Please Inu? I promise I’ll be good! It’s so cloudy in Tokyo at the moment, and the weather report said it was going to rain this afternoon. It would be nice to sit in the sun for a little while, and I’m sure it would be good for me!” she wheedled in a pleading tone.

He sighed. “Okay, just for a bit then.” The phrase ‘whipped’ came to mind, but when she reached up to gently stroke his ear as a thank you, he found he didn’t care in the slightest.

Walking over to a particularly lush patch of grass, half in and half out of the sunshine, he eased her down off his back and they both sat down. Inuyasha sat up straight with his arms braced so Kagome could lean on him as a back rest.

It really was a beautiful day – birds chirping, clouds drifting far above in a sapphire blue sky. A pair of dark swallowtail butterflies fluttered directly overhead, and he tipped his head back to watch them, the iridescent colours in their wings flashing in the sunlight. A thought crossed his mind that he would never have really sat down to enjoy a grassy meadow like this before meeting Kagome. His mind would have been on where his next meal was coming from, his eyes, ears and nose vigilant to catch any traces of other youkai entering his forest. But now all his senses were trained on her.

He focused for a moment on the warm weight of her leaning against him, the regular movement of the muscles in her back as she breathed in and out. There was still a slight wheeziness to her breathing, but nothing like it had been before. The sun went behind a cloud and she shivered slightly.

“You’re not cold are ya? Cause I can take you back through the well right now if ya are”, he fussed.

“Stop it will you? Mother hen!” Kagome elbowed him hard in the ribs, and he grunted, clutching his side and pretending to be mortally wounded as he flopped down to lay on his back in the grass next to her. He squinted as the sun came back out from behind the clouds suddenly, and she shaded his eyes from the bright sunlight with her hand as she giggled. “Let me just enjoy the sunshine for a little while longer. I’m perfectly fine. It’s nice sitting outside after being in bed for nearly a week.”

She leaned over him to cast his face in shadow, her hands either side of his shoulders and a bright grin on her face. The light behind her gave her dark hair a radiant halo, picking out iridescent blue highlights much like the butterflies’ wings, and her clear blue eyes were more luminous than the skies above. He stared up at her, a rush of emotion welling up, filling his heart. She was so beautiful, inside and out. This girl. His sweet girl.

Reaching up he cupped her cheek, and she turned her head to place a soft kiss in his palm. Even though he’d hated that she’d been ill, they were so much closer now. All his barriers had fallen away – he was an open book to her now, and he wanted to be.

“Kagome… you know I’m not good with words, but-“. Her finger pressed down on his lips.

“Don’t use your words then” she whispered. “You’re much better at showing than talking Inuyasha, you always have been. Show me what you want to tell me.”

“C’mere then wench.” His clawed fingers curled around the red tie of her school uniform shirt, gently tugging her downwards to press his lips softly to hers.

She whimpered, her voice and her scent conveying to him just how much she wanted this too. It seemed like they had been dancing around their feelings forever, but there had never been the time or space to allow it to happen, with constant interruptions. But right now, nothing was going to stop him showing her the things he was never able to say, the emotions he’d tried to hide up until now, the absolute wealth of adoration that he held in his heart for her.

The first touch of their lips was intoxicating to him, and his mouth moved hungrily, savouring their connection. Her lips were soft and sweet, just like he’d always imagined them to be, and he couldn’t resist sucking gently on her bottom lip, fangs scraping slightly as he slid the tip of his tongue over the plump pink flesh. He almost pulled back in surprise when her own tongue tentatively met his. His youki rose as her scent spiked, and he eagerly deepened the kiss, growling his approval, unable to hold back any longer.

Kagome traced the contours of his face with her fingertips as they kissed, and he took her hand in his, entwining their fingers. He reveled in the weight of her over him, their racing hearts almost beating in tandem. With his fervent kisses he desperately tried to convey the depth of his feelings, and she responded in kind, her own lips eager as his.

Stroking her hair with his free hand, his claws grazing against her skin now and again, Inuyasha sighed against her lips, knowing that he would have to pull back soon, as much as they both wanted to keep this going. She was still recovering, and her breathing was becoming erratic. He would not rush this. They had time now, time to let this happen gradually, at their own pace.

He pulled back from the kiss, grinning at her little whine of discontent even as she panted for breath, and he soothed her by pressing soft kisses along her jawline, then nuzzled his nose into her neck, inhaling the heady scent of her as he struggled to get his own breathing and libido under control.

“You okay?” he whispered, using his hand to gently lay her head down on his chest, combing his fingers through her dark hair.

“Wow”, she panted.“Just gotta… catch my breath. We’re gonna do that again, right?”

He chuckled. “Definitely, if I have any say in it.”

They lay there together in the sunshine, holding each other close. Time didn’t seem to matter. Nothing mattered, apart from the feel of her lying safe against his chest, her heart beating strongly against his. He pressed his nose into her hair, breathing in her scent. The contented rumble in his chest made Kagome grin, turning her head to rest her chin against his chest.

“I love that sound”, she smiled, gazing into his eyes. “I love how it makes me feel, like nothing bad could ever happen when I’m in your arms.”

“Damn straight.” He swallowed, taking a deep breath. “Cause… cause you’re mine Kagome, and I protect what’s mine.”

Her smile widened, rivaling the sun in it’s brightness. “And you’re mine Inuyasha, and don’t you forget it.” She yawned widely, her eyes blinking, and he reached up to cradle her cheek.

“Sounds like you need a nap wench-o-mine.” She smiled sleepily.

“I am a little tired. What a good thing you’re so comfy”, she teased, poking at his stomach with her fingers and rubbing her cheek against his chest.

“Oi! What am I now, a futon?” he chuckled. She breathed deeply and closed her eyes, snuggling in to get comfortable.

“Shhh, futon’s don’t talk.”

“Are ya sure you don’t want me to take you back through the well?” he asked with concern. “It’s gettin’ later in the afternoon, and your bed’s probably better for ya right now.”

“Nope. Nothing could be better for me than being right here with you. Now shush.”

He listened as her breathing settled and her heartbeat slowed to a steady resting pace. The shade of the tree moved over them, and he wrapped his arms around her, the voluminous sleeves of his fire rat acting as a protective blanket as she slept contentedly in his arms.

He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve her; he’d never really understood what she could see in him that he’d never been able to see himself. All he knew was that he would thank the Kami every damn day that she’d somehow come into his life, against all odds, and he would freely give her his heart and soul. Would continue to protect her with his life as they fought this battle against Naraku together.

He was still worried about what might happen after the jewel was purified, but for now, he was content to let the future look after itself. Because how could his future be anything but bright, with Kagome by his side.

#mamabearcat fanfics #inukag fanfic #Instinct #last chapter - finally!

[smutsonian]

All it takes

Pairing: Dark Thor x Reader

Summary: your mother works as Thor’s housemaid and you had to take over your mother’s job after she got sick

Warning/s: smut, dark thor, naive reader, manipulative thor, dub/con, daddy kink, talks about hospitals and illnesses that I don't know shit about, a lot of words and i mean A LOT of building up and shit

Word Count: 5306 (this was supposed to be just a drabble so wtf have i done?)

strawberrypoptartodinson said: Dark sugardaddy thor x reader pls

masterlist

Y/N stood in front of the door, trying to ease her breathing. Trying to conjure enough confidence to knock on the prestigious door. This wasn’t supposed to happen, she thinks. But for my mother, I’ll do anything.

(FLASHBACK STARTS)

You silently cried as you watched the nurses take your mother to the ICU. It was unexpected. You and your mother were just having your usual dinner at home when she fell to the floor, unconscious. You immediately called for help which got you to where you are now.

The hospital.

You waited and waited… and waited. You never left the hospital. You never left your mother’s side. How could you? She was the only one you have. She was the only family you’ve got. You would do anything to protect her.

Nurses that come every once in a while always advise you to go home, take a shower and rest but you never listen to them. You would never leave your mother. Not when she needed you most. But then the doctor told you what was happening with your mother’s health and that’s when you snapped out of it.

Apparently, your mother has been suffering from a disease for a while now and she never told you about it. She would come in and out of the hospital to have a check-up but the doctor told you that she stopped coming all of a sudden. You remembered how you just started taking classes again because your mother had enough money to help you and insisted that you quit your job because she can pay for your classes. The day you started taking classes is the day she stopped visiting the hospital.

“What?” you whispered, feeling like a shitty daughter for not knowing anything and being the reason why your mother is in that death bed right now. To make it worse, the doctor had to tell you that your mother needed surgery as soon as possible.

“Then carry on with the surgery. Please! Please save my mother.” you begged, willing to drop down to your knees and beg some more. The doctor looked at you sadly and told you the rules about paying before proceeding with the surgery.

Then your mother woke up and told you to just leave it be. She told you to continue going to your classes and asked for a favor. She asked for you to pay her employer a visit and tell him what has been happening so he wouldn’t be confused as to why she stopped going to work. She wanted you to quit for her. 

And that’s what you did. You went to her employer’s house but not with the agenda of quitting for her.

(FLASHBACK ENDS)

 *Knock knock knock* She knocks softly on the door as she took a deep breath, easing her nerves. She straightened her back when she heard rustling on the other side of the door and wore her best smile. Well, it’s now or never. You’re doing this for mother.

The door opened and revealed Adonis himself- or what seemed to be a reincarnation of the god. He was unbelievably tall. He can tower over anyone and he is definitely towering over her. His short hair is as golden as the riches he probably kept deep into his mansion. His beard is neatly groomed that just added to his rich guy aura. His ocean eyes held emotions but are hidden far back by his intimidating gaze. He’s wearing a gray shirt that hugged his physique and showed off his humungous arms and black sweats that fit his long legs. To keep things short, he’s beautiful.

His stoic yet handsome face twisted into a smile that had Y/N’s heart leaping in anxiety. Who knew that her mother worked for a 21st-century version of Adonis? 

“Can I help you?” his voice that held so much authority spoke up.

Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise and embarrassment as she cleared her throat and spoke quietly, “Hi! Umm, Mr. O-Odinson?” 

He elicited a low chuckle and nodded in agreement, “Yeah. That’s me! But please, call me Thor.”

Y/N nodded in confirmation and sucked on her bottom lip absentmindedly. One of her mannerisms whenever she gets nervous. “Yeah… Well, my mother, __, she’s not really doing well right now. She’s currently in the hospital.” 

“Oh… That’s why she hasn’t come in for a week now.” Thor nodded, deep in his own thoughts. “Is she going to be alright?” Thor’s questioned made Y/N blink blankly at nothing for a few seconds. How can such a beautiful man like Thor own a beautiful heart? How is that even possible? He’s handsome and he cares for your mother. Maybe he’ll accept your offer to take your mother’s job. 

“Little one? You alright?” Thor’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. What was the nickname all about?

“Yeah. I’m sorry. And no. She’s not doing too good and she needs to have surgery so she wouldn’t be able to come here anymore.”

“But that’s where I come in!” Y/N squeaked out before Thor could even say anything.

“Sorry...” Y/N smiled sheepishly but continued.

“Mr. Thor, I- My mother needs to go through surgery but we don’t have enough money to pay for it. If it’s okay with you, I would like to take over my mother’s job for her. Please, Mr. Thor? If it’s alright with you? We really need money for her surgery.” Y/N swallowed all her pride and begged the man in front of her.

Thor stared at her for a while, probably thinking about her words as she anticipated for his next words.

“Why don’t you come in and then we can talk about it, yes?” his voice held so much authority and seriousness that Y/N could only nod and follow him through the gigantic mansion.

Y/N yelped as oil started spitting out of the pan she was heating up. She hissed at the burning sensation when a drop fell on her forearm. “Ouch” she rubbed on the spot at a fast pace, hoping the pain would just go away. “You okay, little one?” Thor spoke up from behind her, watching everything that happened with an amused glint in his eyes. He stood up and walked over to her and stopping just inches in front of her. He was towering over her when he leaned down close to her face. 

“W-what-“ Y/N stuttered as she stared up at him.

“Relax, little one” Thor gave her a reassuring smile and moved his face to the side of hers, reaching behind her to shut the stove off. Y/N looked up at him, trying to hide the embarrassment from her facial features when Thor gave her a cheeky smile as he looked down at her.

Y/N yelped when Thor took her forearm and checked the small burn. “Relax, little one. I’m just trying to help you. We should put an ointment on this.” he tooted as he started opening drawers and cabinets, looking for something. Y/N stood still, breathing heavily and trying to get over the fact that she just embarrassed herself in front of Thor and probably ruined her chances of taking over her mother’s job. He asked her to make him something for lunch and she tried. She really did but cooking is not one of her best traits. Neither is cleaning. Her clumsiness is the one to blame for that. She knows she can’t take her mother’s place and so does Thor.

“You know if you want to take your mother’s place, you should be able to take care of me, not the other way around.” Thor let out a small laugh while dabbing the ointment on the burnt part on Y/N’s forearm. Thor’s eyes widened in surprise when Y/N suddenly grabbed the hand that was nursing her forearm. “Please, Mr. Thor! I can learn! I can learn new things real fast. It will work! Please… Just give me another chance! I really need this job. It’s the only way I can help my mother. Please…” Thor’s face turned into a frown when the younger girl cried in front of him. 

“Don’t cry, little one.” He finished putting the ointment and made his way to wipe the tears away from her face. “Don’t cry…” he repeated, brushing some hair away from her face this time around. “I-I really need to help my mother.” she sobbed against his chest when he pulled her towards him.

“I know. I understand. But I can’t have you working as my maid.” Thor cradled her face as he pulled away to examine her face. She was still sobbing, thinking that she had thrown her chances away. “I have a proposition for you.” He gave her a heart-warming smile that helped calm her down a little. “You see, I’ve had every single person in my life take care of me and I’m getting quite tired of it. I need someone to take care of instead. Not just someone. I need you. I want you. I want to take care of you.”  

When Y/N moved away to untangle herself from Thor, he frowned a tiny bit that Y/N almost missed it. “Take care of me? What does that even mean?” Thor grinned at her curious face and shrugged. “It means exactly what it means. I want to take care of you, little one. From the moment I saw you, I knew I wanted to protect you.” Her face grew more confused as he spoke his words. “Huh? Why would you need to protect me? You just met me. I have to work for you so I can earn money for my mother. I don’t understand-” Thor cut her off by placing his index finger against her tear-stained lips. 

“I know that, little one. I’ll pay you for keeping me company. I just ask for your company. That’s it.” 

“Your company? I’m sorry. I really don’t understand any of what you are saying… You’ll pay me for keeping you company?”

“Yes. That means that you would have to give me the majority of your time if that’s alright with you.” Thor gave her a charming smile, giving her the idea that she could be comfortable around him. That she can trust him.

“But that sounds too good to be true! Like, I’ll just stay by your side and then I’ll earn money from that?” she tilted her head in confusion as she furrowed her eyebrows.

Thor chuckled but nodded in agreement. Licking his lips, he took her hand in his gigantic ones and gazed at her with adoring eyes. “That’s all correct, little one. Then maybe I’ll ask a few favors from you in exchange for helping your mother at the hospital, is that alright?” he gave her a hopeful look.

“Yes! Anything to help my mother!” Y/N yipped in excitement which earned a satisfied smile from Thor. 

“That’s good to hear, little one.”

Days have passed and Thor was true to his words. He made sure that Y/N’s mother is well taken care of in the hospital. ____ had also undergone surgery when Thor started sponsoring them. All Y/N had to do was stay in Thor’s mansion with him and keep him company. She stayed in a guest room and would only accompany him if he wanted to converse with her.

Y/N and Thor were sat at the dining room, having their usual dinner. Thor hired a new handmaid called Percilla. A quiet but friendly old lady. Y/N would find herself asking her to teach her basic household chores without making a mess and Percilla was more than glad to help her. 

The clinking of utensils is the only noise that can be heard in the room but then Thor decided to break the silence. “So, little one. I wanted to ask you something.” He set his spoon and fork down the table and turned towards her. Y/N turned towards Thor with a questioning look and a tilted head. “Huh? What is it, Mr. Thor?” He let out a short chuckle and reached for her hands on the table. Y/N’s eyes fluttered and so did her heart at the man’s actions. 

“I have this gala that I have to attend this Friday and I was hoping you could come with me as my date.” He was so straightforward that Y/N had to take a second to process his words.

“Y-your date?” Y/N small voice spoke up after a long pause. Thor let out an airy laugh and nodded. “Yes. We did agree on you keeping me company am I wrong?” Thor unlatched his hands from Y/N’s and leaned his chin on his right one. Y/N’s face fell a little bit but she was quick to nod her head in a brisk manner. “Yeah! No! You’re right, Mr. Thor. I’ll accompany you in the gala.” she gave him a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes like it always would.

“Darcy, my designer, will come later to take your measurements for the dress you’ll be wearing this Friday.” Thor took a sip from his wine glass and stood up. “I’ll be in my office if you need anything.” he gave her a smile and left the room, leaving her with a conflicted heart.

After dinner, Y/N went back to her room and had a shower before laying down on the soft bed that was provided for her. It’s too much of a spacious room for her. She thought that it was unnecessary to have a room that big- like a huge apartment- for sleeping and showering but Thor insisted and Y/N could never say no to him. He gave her so much that all she wanted to do was to make him happy in return by following his simple instructions. She was satisfied to see his joyous smile when she agreed to stay in the huge guest room.

When the clock hit 9:30, soft yet rapid knocks fell upon the bedroom door that took her away from her thoughts. Y/N sighed and pushed herself to walk towards the door. Opening it, a girl with dark hair and a big smile greeted her. “Hi! I’m Darcy! You’re Y/N, right?” her bubbly voice filled the room as she let herself in, leaving Y/N to close the door. When Y/N turned back to Darcy, she started babbling again. 

“You’re like really pretty! No wonder Thor kept you. I bet you would look good in floral. I KNOW you’ll look good in blue! It’s also Thor’s favorite color so that’s a win-win! I can do your hair too! Natural look looks good on you so light make-up would suffice. Oh, I can’t wait to see you all dressed up!” Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise as she tried to understand what Darcy was babbling about but only got the part where she would be fixing her up for the gala. Y/N smiled at the bubbly girl as she walks towards her. “It’s nice to meet you, Ms. Darcy.” she offered her hand to shake but Darcy just laughed at her.

“Oh, you’re really cute!” Darcy swatted Y/N’s hand away and pulled her close for a hug. “Just call me Darcy! I hope we become really good friends! You seem like a literal angel like no hint of evil nor dirt.” Y/N let out a short quiet laugh at Darcy who just stared at her with wide adoring eyes. “Like, at all.” she continued, her expression weirdly turning to a serious one in a matter of seconds. “Well, thank you for your kind words, Darcy. I think you’re really pretty too!” Y/N smiled shyly. Darcy let out a chuckle and pinched Y/N’s cheeks. “Such a cutie. Come on! Let me take your measurements and then we can talk and hang out!”

“All done! Can I play with your hair?” Darcy tucked the tape measure inside her bag and grinned at Y/N. “Uh… Yeah! Sure, go ahead.” Y/N responded with an unsure smile. Darcy yipped in joy and began doing numerous escapades on Y/N’s hair.

“Something’s missing…” Darcy had her right palm on her chin, imitating a thinking child. Y/N tilted her head and wore a fond smile at her new-found friend. Y/N jumped slightly when Darcy screamed and clapped her hands all of a sudden. “I know! Hey, Y/N! What do you say about going shopping?” and with that, Darcy left the room to probably tell Thor about their plans for tomorrow.

Thor has been busy for the past few days. The gala that will be held on the upcoming Friday has been keeping him from Y/N. That’s why Y/N isn’t surprised when Darcy dragged her to his office only to see him deep in his stack of papers. They were about to tell him that they’re leaving for the mall but it seems like he couldn’t care less about it, only humming in response when Darcy told him that they’re leaving.

“We need a ride” Darcy surprised Y/N with how she was brief for the first time since she’s met her. Thor sighed in exhaustion and motioned a hand absentmindedly, still has his eyes on the papers on his desk. “Take Heimdall with you. He’ll drive you.” A guy that’s about an inch smaller than Thor walked up to the girls and stared down at them with a poker face. Y/N gulped as she was intimidated by the man. “Hi, M-Mr. Heimdall. I’m Y/N. It’s nice to m-meet you.” Y/N gave her best smile, ignoring her nerves and held a hand out towards the tall guy. He surprised her by giving her a friendly smile and taking her hand with both of his. “Pleasure to finally meet you. I’ll be escorting you and Darcy. I assure you that you’re in safe hands.” With that, he walked out of the office, expecting the two girls to follow him. 

Y/N took one last glance at Thor but seeing that he was still buried in his work, she followed Heimdall out of the office and out of the mansion. Darcy took a while before she entered the car with a huff. “Are you okay?” Y/N asked, not used to seeing Darcy with an infuriated look on her face. Darcy’s face went back to its usual bubbly aura when she turned to look at the younger girl and quickly nodded, reassuring her that everything’s fine.

The day was spent with Darcy buying Y/N stuff that is unnecessary such as make-up, perfumes, and lotion but she insisted that it would be useful. ESPECIALLY for the gala. One of the things that she bought Y/N is a blue sundress that she forced her to wear as they bought it. It’s a blue sundress that had little puffy sleeves and fell down in the middle of her thighs. She still wore her white sneakers but it made her outfit more adorable- Darcy’s words.

The car ride home was spent with Darcy’s continuous babbling and Heimdall’s occasional chuckle of appreciation from Darcy’s words. Y/N tried to pay Darcy her attention but the thought of Thor couldn’t leave her mind. It feels like he’s been really preoccupied with the upcoming gala and his work or maybe it’s not that. Maybe he’s lost interest in her. Maybe he got bored with her and no longer needed her company. 

What if he throws her away the next time he sees her? What if he tells her that her company is no longer needed? He already paid for her mother’s surgery but why is she still worried about Thor pushing her away? If Y/N was the same person she was a few weeks ago, she wouldn’t be unnerved by Thor’s dismissiveness. She would be thankful that she could have more time for her classes and more time to visit her mother. But that’s not her now. She shamefully developed feelings for the older guy. He made her feel so safe and adored the first few days and she loved it. She loved how he made her feel. But maybe she was just acting like a high school girl with a silly crush. Maybe she should get her head out of the gutter. Thor said it himself. She was his companion. She was meant to accompany him in exchange for money. She’s nothing more than a paid worker.

Y/N’s heart began to beat rapidly when the car skidded to a halt in front of the mansion. She would have to face him. She made a plan to avoid him as much as possible when she’s not needed by him so she can prolong the inevitable. So she can prevent him from firing her. That plan was thrown out the window when Darcy started dragging her towards his office though.

Y/N stared daggers at her white sneakers as Darcy talked to Thor who was unsurprisingly still busy with his paperwork. “How long have you been going through those papers?” Darcy all but whined. Thor hummed boringly and muttered a reply. “Not too long.” “My ass! We left you like this, stayed in the mall for the whole day, came back at dawn and you’re still seated on that chair.” Darcy’s discomfort was palpable yet Y/N remained rooted on her spot, all her attention still on her white sneakers. Thor yet again hummed in reply, seeming uninterested. Y/N felt uncomfortable being in the presence of the two older adults who seem to be in conflict- more on Darcy’s side if Y/N was being honest. 

Not being able to handle the tension, Y/N slowly reached for Darcy’s shoulder, tapping it softly. “I think I’ll head over to bed now, Darcy. Goodnight” Y/N whispered and started making her way out, moving as ghostly as possible. Y/N was stopped by Darcy’s grip on her upper arm yet she wasn’t looking at her, she was glaring at Thor. Y/N couldn’t do anything but gulp at the situation, eyes widening when Darcy shouted at him. “For fuck’s sake, Thor! Can you just pay attention for one second?!” Y/N could hear Thor placing his pen down on the table and the screeching of his chair against the floor.

“What is so important that you have to interrupt me from doing my work, Darcy?” his voice was calm but there’s a hint of darkness and annoyance in his voice that has Y/N crying internally at Darcy’s defiance.

“I’d be more than willing to tell you but first, little Y/N here is about to head over to bed. Why don’t you show her some attention and quit being an ass. Just a tiny bit of attention.” Darcy’s tone was harsh but all Y/N could think about was how confusing her words are. How confusing the whole situation is. Trying to ease the tension, Y/N tucked a small piece of hair behind her ear and glanced up at Thor from her sneakers. His attention was now towards her, eyes slightly wider than usual. Smiling ever so slightly, her soft voice broke the hostile atmosphere. “It’s fine, really. It’s pretty late. I’ll just be heading to my room now. Goodnight Mr. Odinson.” She watched as Thor’s eyebrows twitch ever so slightly. She then turned towards Darcy with the same smile, “Goodnight Darcy. Today was fun.” and with that, she shyly walked out of the office without any interruption. 

Y/N sighed in relief when she entered the comfort of her room. That was intense for her. It was also weird. She noticed the unspoken conflict between Darcy and Thor but she didn’t think much about it. She didn’t have the right to. She was just another employee. She doesn’t have the right to meddle. Sighing, she walks over to the side of her bed, getting ready to unzip her dress when a knock came from the door.

“Little one?” 

Oh gosh. This is it. He’s going to fire me! Y/N paced back and forth, contemplating if she should open the door or just pretend to already be asleep.

“Please open the door, little one” the desperation and sadness in his voice forced her to walk towards the door and open it. Looking up at Thor, Y/N forced a smile and took a deep breath. “Hi” she squeaked out. Thor frowned at her ever so slightly but her heart whimpered when she noticed it. Here it comes.

“You look enchanting in that dress, little one.” Wait, what?

“Wha-?”

“I’m sorry that I’ve been distant, little one. I hope you didn’t feel neglected while I was busy with my job…” he spoke as he cradled her face.

“O-Oh no! Not at all! Darcy and Heimdall, they’re really nice and friendly!” Y/N moved her hands towards Thor’s and pulled away, giving him another false smile.

“You have nothing to be sorry about, Mr. Odinson.” Thor frowned and took a step back. “I thought I told you to call me Thor?” he said, sounding disappointed and irked.

“I’m sorry-” Y/N tried to apologize but Thor cut her off.

“You’re upset with me, little one. It’s alright to be upset. I’ve been a useless fellow for the past few days.” he looked down, voice hoarse and sad.

“No! Really, Mr. Thor. It’s fine. You’re not a useless fellow-”

“Let me make it up to you. Please, little one. Let me please you.” He looked up and held her face with both of his enormous hands. “Do me a favor and let me please you.”

“W-what do you mean?” Y/N breathed out, shoulders moving along with her deep breaths.

“Let me make it up to you, little one. Please allow me to make you feel good. Allow me to make it up to you.” Thor was begging Y/N for something she couldn’t quite understand. What did he mean by pleasing her? What does make it up to her mean?

“I don’t understand” Y/N whispered as she held Thor’s hands that encased her face.

“Just tell me that you want me to make it up to you, princess.”

“O-okay.” Y/N nodded. 

“And another favor.” Thor’s eyes turned darker than usual and spurted a sly smile. One hand strayed away from her face and glided towards the hem of her dress, sliding it up and bunching it up on her waist. The other hand made its way towards her panties, stopping just above the fabric.

“Call me daddy as I please you.” Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise and confusion towards Thor’s favor. Her hands laid on his broad shoulders for support. 

“D-daddy?” 

“Yes. That’s right, princess.” Thor hummed in satisfaction and dragged her panties to the side, tracing his fingers along her folds.

“M-Mr. Thor!” Y/N grabbed the hand that was playing with her folds with panicked eyes.

Thor shook his head and tooted, “That’s not my name, princess.” 

“Daddy… W-what are you doing?” Y/N bit her lip as tears fall down her cheeks.

“Don’t cry, my little princess. I’m trying to please you. I can’t please you if you’re crying like this.” the hand that was playing with her folds left to cradle her face again. Thor leaned down and kissed her forehead, fixing her hair and wiping the tears away.

“Can you stay calm for daddy, princess? Can you do that?” Thor held her chin and waited for her answer. She nodded but Thor slightly shook his head. “I want to hear it, princess.”

“Y-yes, Daddy.” Thor smiled in contentment and slid his hand back towards her core, thumb instantly playing with her clit while his middle finger positioned itself just in front of her entrance, collecting the wetness that Y/N is producing.

“Mmmph” Y/N’s face scrunched when she felt a stir in her stomach and didn’t catch the way Thor stared at her face with admiration. 

“You’re doing so well, princess,” Thor whispered in her ear. Collecting enough wetness around his middle finger, he pushed in slowly, earning a whimper from Y/N. “Shh, shh. It’s okay, little one. It’s okay.” he kissed her forehead and rubbed his thumb on her clit at a faster speed while pumping his middle finger in and out of her. Thor moaned when he felt her walls clamp around his finger, her tightness doing wondrous effects on his cock that now tainted his dress pants. 

Y/N’s face wore a frown that screamed pleasure which Thor loved watching. Her mouth slightly opened, releasing heavy breaths as he played with her pussy. “Ahh…” she moaned as she started bucking her hips against Thor’s fingers which earned her a grin. “That’s right, princess. You’re so perfect for me.” He grunted as he sped his actions up, earning pleasurable cries from her.

Y/N’s eyes widened in alert when she felt her stomach doing somersaults. Afraid to make a mess, she tried to pull away from Thor but he didn’t allow it. The hand that was bunching up her dress pulled her closer and wrapped an arm around her. “Don’t worry, princess. Just relax and let go. You can do it, little one.” Thor added another finger in her and started curling it as he plunged it inside of her. 

Y/N’s body stiffened as she released into Thor’s hand. Her face is all scrunched up and tears are welling up in her eyes. Thor grinned as he brought his hand up, showing his glistening wrist and fingers. “Wow, princess. You’re a fountain!” he chuckled as Y/N hid her face by pressing her cheeks to her shoulder.

“No, no. None of that.” He chided as he gently took her chin with his dry fingers and grabbed her wrist with the other. “Look at what you do to me, little one.” he guides her hand down his pants, pressing it on his hard-on. “Feel what you do to daddy.” Y/N let out a gasp when she felt how hard and how big he is. Thor watched her with a smile, loving the way she reacts around him. Loving the way how she responds around him. Loving the way she clenched around his fingers. Loving the way how she acted the way he wanted her to act. Loving how his plan turned out so well.

“You were so tight around two of my fingers, I wonder how you would feel like around my cock.” Thor groaned as he pressed her hand harder against his cock. Loving the way she feels against him, he still made his way to push her hand away and caressed her face. “But we’ll have none of that now. Tell me, little one. Did daddy please you well?” Thor stroked her hair softly and watched as she nodded eagerly.

“Yes, daddy. It was amazing. I never felt that before.” Thor smiled and embraced her in a bear hug. 

“You deserve it, little one. Now let me clean you up.” Thor bent down to pick her up and walked towards her bathroom. He placed her on the counter and helped her out of the dress. Thor stared at her for a while before turning away to get a small damped towel. “You have such an angelic beauty, little one,” he says as he wipes her thighs and her core gently. Thor brushed her hair as he finished cleaning her and dressing her up. He carried her back to her room and placed her on the bed gently.

“Sleep tight little one.”

#thor x reader #thor imagine #sugar daddy thor x reader #dark thor #dark thor x reader #dark thor imagine #thor odinson imagine #thor drabble #thor oneshot #dark fic

[littleredlie]

Malignant (S1P2)

Series Masterlist | Master Masterlist

Chicago Med x doctor!OC Morgan Fitzgerald is a doctor at Chicago Medical, on her sister’s birthday she tries to stay focused on her patients without her emotions getting in the way, but it gets more difficult when a friend is in the hospital and her ex is lurking around. Based off S1E5 of Chicago Med.

5.3k+ Words

Featuring: Morgan Fitzgerald, Will Halstead, Natalie Manning, April Sexton, Maggie Lockwood, Ethan Choi, Daniel Charles, Sharon Goodwin, Connor Rhodes, Jay Halstead, Sam Zanetti, Kelly Severide, Christopher Herrmann Warning: Patient death, some cursing, angst, medical details that may or may not be wrong.  A/N: Sorry I posted later than usual, yesterday was quite the day. Enjoy!

Part One

The morning was running a bit slow, not that Morgan didn’t appreciate it. She didn’t get any sleep last night and the coffee she was sipping was not helping at all. She could barely focus on the notes in front of her as memories of her older sister kept flashing in front of her eyes. Eventually she gives up and tears her eyes away from the glaring screen. Leaning back in the chair, she notices Mrs. Goodwin talking to Detective Halstead and Lt. Severide. She keeps looking for a moment, wondering what they were talking about. Momentarily, the detective’s eyes sweep over the ED’s space and they land on her. She quickly looks back down to the computer and tries to peek from her peripheral to see if he’s stopped looking. He has, but Morgan doesn’t want to be caught looking again so she forces herself to continue looking at the computer screen.

Her attention is brought back up again when she notices the detective walk toward where she was sitting. Her heart rate picks up a little as he nears her, but then she realizes that Will is standing right next to her. The detective doesn’t even take notice of Morgan's presence, and honestly that stung her a little bit. She clenches her jaw and continues forcing herself to look at the screen, when she fails again, she decides to eavesdrop on the detective and Will’s conversation.

“Can I ask you a doctor question?” Jay asks and Morgan notices the familiarity, she knew they were brothers of course, but she only witnessed their relationship a few times before.

“Sure, come on.” The brothers walk away a little to gain some privacy, but Morgan is still able to hear them. As she did move her chair a bit more to the right and turned so that her ear was exposed to them. 

“Um, Herrmann?” His voice kind of hesitant

“Yeah,” Will asks, not fully paying attention.

“If he’d come in on your watch, would you have waited so long before doing anything?” It takes so much of the eavesdropping doctor’s will to not turn around and butt in, but she couldn’t. Jay and her weren’t close and eavesdropping on a colleague’s private conversation was not the best course of action.

“That’s a tough call.” Will sighs out. “It’s been a while since my surgical residency. And, you know, I wasn’t there for the exam so it’s hard to say.” Morgan could tell that Will was trying not to insinuate anything negative on Connor’s behalf and she hoped that Jay would take it, but he continues to egg on.

“Yeah, just in general.” He asks and Will basically gives in.

“In general?” He pauses for just a second, “ yeah, I probably would have gone in.” Natalie gives Morgan a smile as she walks by and Morgan almost misses it, but manages to throw one right back at her. “But, uh, again, I wasn’t there.”

At that Morgan scoffs and abruptly stands up, grabbing her tablet. She turns towards the brothers and tries to make a clean getaway, but Will stops her.

“Hey, Morgan.”

Morgan halts and closes her eyes, as if to calm herself, and hopes that something will fall out of the sky and allow her to be taken into a trauma room for treatment, but no such luck. She breathes out and slowly turns towards the Halstead brothers. “Yes, Dr. Halstead?” She questions, trying to keep her eyes off of Jay.

“I’d like you to meet my brother,” he points to the detective who Morgan can tell has gotten a little uncomfortable, but he sports a little grin on his face. “This is Jay. Jay, this is Dr. Morgan Fitzgerald.�� He introduces the two, not knowing that they already know each other.

“Hi, Detective Halstead,” Morgan says, the tight smile on her face slightly distorting her words. Jay gives her a look, his eyes quickly darting to his brother, who is oblivious to what is going on. Morgan holds out a hand to him and he takes it, shaking gently.

“Hi, doctor. It’s nice to meet you.” His calloused hand was in hers for a little too long and she could remember the first time they were in hers. The actual first time they met. 

December 2013 

Morgan’s eyes were cast down to the tablet in front of her, but she was zoning out. One hand was stuffed in the pocket of her white coat, clutching the bracelet that she received for her birthday last year. A gift from her sister Olivia. Hayden had insisted that she stay home instead of forcing herself into work, but she needed a distraction. But now it seemed that it wasn’t working, especially after that last patient. She looked too much like Olivia. 

Morgan’s focus continues to deplete as she stared like a statue, a few onlookers getting concerned. Especially Maggie.“Dr. Fitzgerald?” Her name falls on deaf ears as Morgan continues to stare at the screen. “Dr. Fitzgerald!” Maggie’s voice raises and Morgan finally snaps out of her trance.

“Sorry Maggie.” The doctor whips her head up and looks to the nurse. “What do you need?” She places the tablet on the desk and stuffs her hand back into the pockets of her scrubs. Maggie pauses for a few seconds, looking at the doctor with concern before finally turning to face the body behind her. 

“This is Detective Halstead, he is on your Jane Doe’s case.” Morgan’s eyes finally land on the freckled man standing behind the charge nurse. Morgan could tell that he was handsome and it stuns her for a minute. He had freckles sprinkled all over his face and soft colored eyes. 

It’s his voice that makes her pay attention.“Detective Halstead,” he repeats, holding his hand out for her. She takes it and his hand basically envelops hers. They were warm and calloused and hers were cold and smooth. A slight grin is on his face and Morgan thinks it compliments his face so much more.

“Dr. Fitzgerald.  Morgan.” Their hands finally pull apart and Morgan doesn’t really like the emptiness the action left behind. “Jane Doe is up in ICU, I can take you.” She puts an arm out pointing in the direction towards the elevator and the detective begins walking. Maggie gives Morgan a look, her eyes flashing between the doctor’s tired face and the detective’s receding back. “Thanks for your help Maggie,” her eyes widened, as if she was telling the nurse to stop it. 

Maggie just laughs and continues doing her job.Morgan finally walks up to Detective Halstead and presses the up button for the elevator. “So, I’ve never seen you around here before.” Morgan says, her eyes not on Halstead but the descending number as the elevator headed for their floor.

“Yeah, I just started with the Intelligence Unit.” He sheepishly says.

“Well congratulations.” She nods, not sure what else to say. She didn’t understand why it was taking the elevator so damn long to get there. “I’ve been here a little over a year myself. If you ever want a tour of the best places in Chicago, I am your girl.” She says, not knowing that he was also a Chicago native.

“Are you asking me out?” He says, a teasing tone obviously present and an amusing look on his face. Morgan chokes a laugh out, a little surprised and a little flabbergasted. She had no idea what to say cause that wasn’t her intention, but it wouldn’t be a bad thing if they did end up going out. Before she could open her mouth to say anything the bell dings, signifying that the elevator had arrived. 

The brunette steps in first as Morgan is still trying to comprehend their conversation. She slowly steps in beside him and presses the button for the ICU’s floor. After a long day of sulking and mourning, a small smile finally shows up on her face as she takes in the presence that Detective Jay Halstead emitted.

Jay squeezes her hand slightly, and it pulls Morgan out of the memory. She rips her hand out of his too quickly after noticing how long she must’ve been holding it. Will actually notices this time and opens his mouth to say something to her, but she beats him to it.

“I’m sorry Jay, but I have a patient to take care of. It was nice meeting you.” before either brother could say anything to her, she turns around and bolts out of the ED. 

         ❦

Later on, Morgan is making her way up to Lt. Herrmann’s room to check on him and Connor. She had heard that he was beating himself up about his decision about his patient and it didn’t help that there were others questioning his decision as well. When she arrived at the room, Kelly was also peering in. The lieutenant doesn’t notice her as he’s too busy glaring at Connor. 

“You think it might’ve helped if you hadn’t waited so long?” Kelly asks and Morgan’s breath sits in her chest as she throws an accusing look at her acquaintance. He still doesn’t notice her standing next to him.

“Excuse me?” Connor turns, his eyes dashing to you quickly before landing on the firefighter.

“If you’d operated on him when we brought him in. Not waited.”

“Are you talking to me about medicine right now?”

“I’m talking to you about my friend,” Kelly points towards the unconscious Chris.

“Look, I’m gonna say this once, because he is my friend too.” He breathes out “I did what was right.”

“Well, some of your fellow docs don’t agree.”

“Really?” Connor steps closer, and Morgan steps forward as well, ready to throw herself between them if she had to. “Odd that they would share that with you and not me.” The men begin to glare each other down and Morgan forces herself from beside them. She puts herself between them, her back towards Connor and she looks up at the lieutenant.

“Lieutenant Severide, can I have a word with you?” He doesn’t stop glaring at Connor and Morgan can feel the tension continue to rise. “Kelly,” Morgan says sternly and he finally looks at her. She places a hand on his arm, tugs him away from the situation, and to a secluded corner. Connor turns away and walks down the hall, Morgan watches him before he disappears and she turns back to Kelly.

“What the hell was that Kelly?” Her arms are crossed across her chest and she huffs out, an angered look on her face. Kelly looks at her for a second before taking a few steps away. “Kelly!”

“His decision could’ve cost Chris his life! If he had operated sooner, we wouldn’t be in this position!” He practically yells, but Morgan doesn’t jump, instead she keeps her eyes on him.

“And you’re so sure about that?” He gives her a look of disbelief, a scoff escaping his lips.

“Of course you side with him.”

“Really Kelly,” this time she scoffs, “that’s how you want to do this?” 

“Yeah, that’s how we’re doing this doctor.”

“Well Lieutenant, last time I checked you were a firefighter, not a doctor. Given the information that Dr. Rhodes had, he made the appropriate decision. A decision I would have made as well.” The agitated firefighter doesn’t look the doctor in the eye, instead glancing to his colleague’s recovery room. “Now questioning a decision that has been said and done will do nothing to help Herrmann, we are doing our absolute best to make sure that he will be okay. Pitting the doctors that are supposed to be taking care of him against each other will not help.” He finally looks down at her, trying to glare her down but she doesn’t back away. “Go walk it off Kelly.” Morgan says with a softer tone, her eyes pleading. And without waiting for a reply from him, she walks away, hoping that her words would persuade him to calm down. 

         ❦

Morgan’s staring off into the distance, obviously upset. The day just seemed to dredge on and she constantly found herself thinking about her sister, which work was supposed to distract her from. For some reason, today was different. Her right hand was fiddling with the bracelet, as it always did on an anniversary related to Olivia. 

“Morgan, you okay?” Will pulls up next to the distracted doctor, looking down at a patient’s charts.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just lost a patient.” She wasn’t necessarily lying. She did lose a longtime patient to cancer, but she didn’t delve deeper into how the day just seemed to be tainted in death for her. But after all these years Will knew when she was lying, she happened to bite her lip whenever she was. 

“Are you sure Morgan, you’ve been a little off today.” He sits in the seat next to her, turning it to have his whole body face her.

“I’m okay Will,” she snaps before taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” She slips the bracelet into her pocket and Will notices but decides not to push since she seemed to be stressed already. “It just sucks that we can’t save everyone, you know. People keep dying and sometimes all we can do is watch.” She shrugs at the end of her sentence and turns her chair away so that she isn’t facing him anymore. He didn’t know why she didn’t just let him in, they’ve been friends ever since he came back to Chicago and started at Med. 

“Morgan–” He isn’t allowed to continue as Maggie’s voice arises from somewhere in the ED.

“Rhodes and Halstead, we’ve got an incoming!” The charge nurse’s eyes on the cube in her hands as she begins directing the doctors. 

“Got it!” Rhodes says grabbing some gloves from a box. 

“Wanna help us out?” Will asks Morgan, nodding his head towards the doors.

“Sure,” Morgan shrugs nonchalantly. Will nods, still a little concerned for her, but he allows for the two of them to get to work..

“What do we got?” Connor asks as he, Morgan, and Will make their way up to the bay doors. Morgan pulls the gloves on her hands as the paramedic reports.

“25-year-old witnessed seizure in the street. She was clipped by a swerving car. GCS 3, intubated in the field.” They continue moving her deeper into the ED, turning to wheel her into the trauma room. “102 over 60, tachy at 110.”

“Alright, on my count.” Dr. Rhodes starts, “One, two, three.” Together, the team moves her onto the treatment table. “Give me a laryngoscope to confirm the tube. X-rays of the chest and pelvis, then to CT for a pan-scan.”

“Yes, doctor.” A nurse answers.

Morgan has her stethoscope on her chest, listening. “This isn’t a trauma. She went down before she was hit.” Dr. Halstead says to his colleagues hoping that it would change the route of treatment.

“But we don’t know the damage, she was hit by a car.” Connor rebutes quickly.

“Because she had a seizure,” Halstead says back.

Morgan huffs out a breath and focuses on the patient. “She’s tachy. Sats are down.” A nurse says and Morgan nods.

“Alright, let’s give her 500 milligrams of keppra.” Morgan says after viewing her pupil reaction with a light.

“Yes, doctor.” A nurse answers and proceeds.

“She’s got a chemo port.” April points out after cutting the patient’s shirt off.

“I’m telling you, the money’s in the seizure. We gotta figure that out,” Will reassures trying to get Morgan to agree. “Get a CBC, CMP, HCG, and a tox screen. Tell CT we’re going for the head only, not the whole body.” Before April could step away to put in the orders, Connor interrupts.

“No, tell CT that we’re going for the whole body. Now.” The tension in that small treatment room was suffocating for Morgan, if she wasn’t so focused on the patient, she might’ve gone off on her coworkers. “Must be nice, having so many opinions.” Connor bites.

“I have opinions about how I handle incoming patients. I don’t like that QT on the monitor.”

“On it!”

“You by any chance share those opinions with your brother?”

“What, Herrmann?” Will asks, but he knows the answer. “Look, Jay asked, so I told him.” 

Before Connor could say something again, Morgan interrupts with a growl, “Boys, not now!” They give Morgan a look, but drop the issue returning their undivided attention back to the unconscious patient.

“What’s happening?” A new voice enters the room and Doris interjects, trying to pull her out of the room. A chime on the monitor goes off and pulls everyone’s attention to it.

“She’s in V-tach!” Morgan states and a nurse gives off her blood pressure. “I can’t get a pulse.

“We need a crash cart, start compressions, now!” Connor orders and Will begins.

“We’re losing her.” The flatline corroborates that statement, but Will continues compressions.

“Charge to 200. Clear!”

Dr. Halsted pulls his hands off of Dani’s chest,“clear!” And Dr. Rhodes shocks her. When nothing happens, Will continues compressions, waiting for the next shock. 

“Come on, come Dani.” Morgan watches Will performing CPR. For some reason the doctor’s heart was beating out of her chest, a pit was forming at the bottom of her stomach, she couldn’t lose her.

“Milligram of epi.”

“One of epi.” April repeats.

“Clear!”

Will again pulls his hands off her chest again, “clear!” And they do it again, shocking Dani while her partner pleads from the door of the room. When nothing happens again, this time it’s Dr. Fitzgerald that orders another round of epi, but everyone hesitates. 

“Dr. Fitzgerald.” April starts, but Morgan isn’t having it.

“Now.” Morgan steps in the way of Will and continues compressions on the patient’s chest.

“One of epi,” April says, knowing it’s a lost cause.

“Stop compressions,” Connor says after a moment, but Morgan doesn’t stop. 

“Dr. Fitzgerald,” Will starts, putting a hand on Morgan’s back, but she continues. “Morgan,” he says softly this time and she finally pulls herself away, staring at the dead patient in front of her. Will gives her a concerned look, as he notices the crumpling look on her face.

“Time of death: 16:21.” At that Morgan lets a breath out and the woman at the door begins to cry. Morgan rips off her gloves and steps out of the room, not willing to see the heartbreaking scene in front of her. 

Why did today have to be so suffocating for her? Her eyes begin to tear up and without stopping she lightly jogs out through the lobby to the front of the building. The tears finally escaped down her face. With her hands on her hips, she looks up to the night sky trying her hardest to stop crying and to control her breathing.

“Morgan?” She recognizes the voice and at that moment she wants the world to swallow her whole, she didn’t want him to see her like this. Looking down, she sees Jay Halstead approaching her body and unknowingly she steps back, but he doesn’t seem to notice. “Are you okay?” There is genuine concern in his eyes, they’re gentle and she remembered how much she missed looking into his eyes.

Morgan roughly wipes away her tears and sniffles, not yet looking at him. “I’m fine, Jay.” She pauses, not sure on how much to tell him. “Just lost a patient, that’s all.”

“Are you sure?” He pushes, knowing she’s hiding something.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” She gives him a smile that doesn’t reach her eyes, hell, it barely makes it past her lips.

“You’ve been a doctor for over three years now Morgan, I’ve never seen you react–.”

“Well Jay, we only dated for seven months and you’ve barely spoken to me in the last two years. I’ve changed.” She snaps, interrupting him, trying her hardest to mask any other reason for her to break down this easy.

“You don’t have to talk to me, I get it.” He puts himself in her point of view, forcing her to finally look at him. “But talk to someone, please.” He looks at her waiting for some type of response. Unwittingly, a tear escapes Morgan’s eyes and she hesitantly nods. Jay gives her a soft smile.

“So,” he starts trying to lighten the mood, “you didn’t tell my brother about us.” At that Morgan gives out a short chuckle, wiping the tears away and fully turning towards the detective.

“No, I didn’t. There was no point in doing so,” Morgan shrugs, seeing a hint of amusement in his eyes. “We were broken up and I wasn’t here for even a year yet, didn’t want to ruin the dynamic that Will and I were building.” She glances away, before a realization arises in her mind. “Why didn’t you tell him?”

“I guess for the same reason,” he shrugs now, but his voice is soft.

“How’re things with Erin?” Jay grimaces, but Morgan laughed. His partner was the reason she broke up with him, she didn’t feel like becoming a second choice. She didn’t feel like competing against a woman that he spent so much time with where she barely saw due to their hours. If you love them, gotta let them go, right?

“Things are good, we’re good.”

“That’s good. I’m happy for you. Really.” He looks at her, a solemn look on his face, words ready to pour out about their past relationship. Morgan, however, doesn’t want to hear it, she spent months trying to get over the handsome detective, she didn’t need him to dredge up old feelings. Gladly, her pager goes off and she sees that she’s being called to check up on another one of her patients. “Are you here to see Will or something?”

Jay is confused at her question at first before realizing that the opportunity to talk had passed. “Yeah, yeah I am”

“I’ll walk you in.” Together the two walk into the hospital, muttering a quick goodbye. Will exits the ED and sees the interaction between his brother and Morgan, he glimpses at the comfortable  aura between them and makes a note to address it later, after he confronted his brother about their conversation earlier.

         ❦

After discharging a patient that was wheeled in earlier, Morgan’s phone beeps and she fishes it out from the pocket of her scrubs. It was from Dr. Charles. The doctor was anxious, hoping that this wasn’t a talk about her overreacting behavior with Dani. Taking a deep breath to call her nerves, she makes her way down to the morgue. When she gets to the hallway that leads to her destination, she is caught up with Will and Connor. They greet each other, but Morgan ignores them, and she especially ignores the concerning looks that they were both giving her. The boys stop in front of the morgue’s door, but Morgan does not feel like sticking around for their conversation, so she walks in between them and enters.

Dr. Charles is standing in the room alongside the medical examiner and he greets her. “Dr. Fitzgerald, here.” He hands her a sheet and she looks down to it. It’s the results for her patient, Dani who was lying dead in front of her. Morgan takes the paper and takes a step away from the body, Dr. Charles notices. Soon, Halstead and Rhodes step into the room. “Gentlemen,” Dr. Charles says, also handing them a sheet.

Rhodes looks down and reads the results, coming to the same conclusion Morgan did when she read it. “Dani OD’ed on chemo. That explains why she seized in the street.”

Dr. Charles nods and gives a sigh out, “that’s not the troubling part. Yeah, she was loaded up on chemo. But this woman,” he says to Dr. Fitzgerald, “never had cancer.” It was like he was trying to tell her that she could not have saved her, that it wasn’t her fault that she was gone. 

All Morgan knew was that it didn’t help.

         ❦

Now, Dr. Choi, Dr. Halstead, Dr. Rhodes, and Dr. Fitzgerald stood in Mrs. Goodwin’s office listening to Dr. Charles’s hypothesis about the two women who OD'd on chemo.

“Two patients in one day overdose on chemo and neither had cancer.” He hands something to Mrs. Goodwin while Morgan goes through the patients’ charts.

“Which, I must admit, does seem suspicious.” Goodwin replies, setting her glasses on her nose.

“Well, it could be a new oncologist in town making incorrect diagnoses.” Connor remarks, but doesn’t sound like he has convinced himself.

“Or even just mixing up a few charts,” Dr. Choi adds.

“Yeah, but even then, why the overdoses?” Morgan asks, finally looking up to the people in the room. “And on the same day? It doesn’t add up.”

“What do we know about these women?” Sharon asks, taking off the glasses and pointing her attention to Dr. Charles.

“Jessica’s note said she felt betrayed.” He answers her.

“And Dani’s girlfriend said Dani was upset about something, but wouldn’t talk about it,” Will speaks up.

“Something was going on with both of these women,” the psychiatrist continues.

“Yeah, but we don’t have any medical records, and no information that might link them.” Morgan points out looking back to the charts, trying to find some reason as to why they overdosed on chemo.

Goodwin brainstorms out loud, “I’m going to get in touch with some local oncologists, see if there have been any problems with their chemo or if they’ve had other patients in the same condition. Thank you,” she nods to the doctors and they begin to head out. Connor places his hand on Morgan’s lower back and leads the two of them away from Choi and Halstead.

“Hey, are you okay?” The look on his face shows that he knows what she’s going through.

“Um,” Morgan hesitates and breathes out, looking down the hall where Will seems to be waiting for her. “Yeah, it’s just that–” Morgan trails off, looking everywhere but Connor’s eyes.

“It’s Olivia’s birthday,” he finishes for her and almost immediately, tears begin to cloud Morgan’s eyes. She collapses against her friend, his arms immediately wrapping around her.

Will watched them, he watched how open and vulnerable Morgan was with Rhodes. He understood that they knew each other since their childhood, but Rhodes has been gone for the past few years, and Will had been there instead. Or maybe he hadn’t been, as he looked at Morgan sobbing in Rhodes’s arms, he wondered if he ever really knew her, if she could ever allow him in her life like she allows Connor. He walks away from them, giving them space and himself time to think.

Connor reluctantly pulls away from Morgan, wiping away the tears from her face. “She would’ve been 32 years old, possibly married, maybe a few kids. I don’t know, I’ll never know,” Morgan whispers the last part, looking down at her feet. “I don’t know why I’m letting this affect me so much.” She angrily sighs out, turning away from Connor.

He lays a hand on her shoulder, “It was barely four years ago and Olivia was brutally murdered, it’s gonna take time. Maybe you should talk to Dr. Charles.”

“Well how much time until I am so distracted that I end up affecting a patient?” She yells, receiving a few annoyed and confused looks from some bystanders. At this time Dr. Charles is stepping out of Goodwin’s office and his attention is brought to the two arguing doctors. Morgan doesn’t want to be analyzed by the psychiatrist and she’s tired of the look of pity on Connor’s face, so she decides to remove herself from the situation.

“Morgan–”Connor begins, but she has already begun to walk away.

         ❦

The end of her shift was two hours ago, but she was still at the hospital, on the roof staring at the Chicago skyline. She couldn’t go home, she knew she wasn’t gonna be able to get any sleep tonight. A breeze danced around the doctor’s body and she tried her hardest to retreat deeper into her jacket, but it wasn’t helping much. The wind pushed the curls of her hair to brush against her face and despite this very reason, Morgan liked having her natural hair out. She felt a little bit more in control, a bit more free, a bit more beautiful. The braids she had in her hair last month were getting harder to handle, so she was okay with letting her hair and scalp breathe for a bit. Over the years her hair grew remarkably well and she was starting to feel a lot more confident in herself. Maybe she’d let it out longer than a few weeks.

“Hey, I didn’t know you were still here.” Morgan turns to Connor’s voice, he’s walking towards her.

“Yeah, I have a patient downstairs that I don’t want to leave.” He looks at her, knowing that she’s not telling the whole truth. But he doesn’t push her, at least not for now.

“I heard what you did for me today.” He leans next to her on the railing, his eyes peering out as well.

“What? With Kelly?” She asks and Connor nods. “It’s no big deal. They’re all one big family and can get a little hostile without noticing. I just had a little talk with him.”

“How long had you known him?”

“I met him shortly after I started my residency here, through an ex.”

“An ex?” He chuckles, “who?”

“Someone not important. He’s not really in my life anymore. But after deciding to maintain my paramedic license, I rode along a few times with their station and got close to them. I had hoped I could use my relationship with them as an advantage to talk Kelly down.”

“Well thanks.” He nudges her and she smiles, “however, you don’t always have to come to my rescue. Especially when you won’t let me come to yours.”

“It’s not that Connor, it’s just that sometimes there’s this look you give me. Like I’m broken and you want to fix me. I already get it from the rest of my family, and from Hayden. I don’t want that from you.”

“I understand, but it’s because I care about you Morgan.” He slings an arm around her shoulder and she leans against him.

“I appreciate it, and I promise that I’ll let you know if I need rescuing. But for now, let me just have my best friend, okay?”

“Alright, I’ll hold you to that promise.” He chuckles. For a moment, they’re quiet, leaning against each other, letting their troubles past them even for just a moment.

“So, you and Dr. Zanetti? I did not see that coming.” She looks at Connor skeptically and he scoffs at her.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He looks down at Morgan, genuinely curious.

“I don’t know, it’s just that she’s her and you’re you. She’s the definition of an egotistical surgeon and you’re not.” Connor looks at her, urging her to continue, but Morgan knows it’s not her place. “But that’s just my opinion, I’m sure she’s nice and you wouldn’t be dating her if there wasn’t something there.”

“Is there some history between the two of you.” He asks, removing his arm from around the ED doctor.

“Just some disagreements on invasive versus less invasive procedures, it’s not a big deal. Don’t let my professional troubles ruin your personal life.” Connor nods his head, still a little wary of Morgan’s attitude towards his girlfriend. As he should be, Morgan felt a little jealousy clawing away at her insides, she didn’t understand why. It wasn’t like Connor was going to disappear out of her life now that he was dating Sam. Or maybe it was the fact that Morgan wasn’t his girlfriend, but that thought never crossed her mind.

“Are you dating anyone?”

“God, no. I don’t have the time for dates or caring about another person’s schedule. I did it a while in 2013, we dated, but we had opposite schedules and so I ended it.”

“When did you first get here? Morgan, that was almost three years ago!”

“No it was, two years ago. We broke up in 2014 and I just haven’t made time to go out.”

“God, you’re ridiculous.”

“Thank you, but I’m fine with it.” She shrugs and Connor just shakes his head, not really understanding her decision. If only he understood that the universe was working against the two, it was never the right time for the both of them.

“Come on Morgan, let me drive you home.” Morgan nods and the two of them make their way down to the first floor. She could feel a little bit of the weight rising off of her shoulders as the two of them finally left the hospital.

Part Three

#One Chicago #one chicago x oc #jay halstead x oc #jay halstead #will halstead x oc #will halstead #connor rhodes x oc #connor rhodes #ethan choi #april sexton #maggie lockwood #natalie manning #sharon goodwin #chicago med #gaffney chicago medical center #season 1 episode 5 #malignant #part two #chicago fire #chicago pd #fanfiction #one chicago fanfiction #chicago med fanfiction

[bangcrizpychan]

Love Is Sweeter The Second Time Around

☆Pairing: gang member!Jeon Wonwoo x wife!Reader

☆Genre: Fluff, slight angst, gang!au

☆Requested: Yes, by: ✨anon

☆Word count: 2.1k

⚠WARNINGS: mentions of accident, swear words

☆Summary: When your husband momentarily lost his memories due to an injury, you will do everything in your power to restore the love you once had and save your family.

☞Note: y/d/n = your daughter’s name, y/s/n = your sister’s name (wonwoo is so cute ilhsm~♥~) Happy reading (˘³˘)♥

You smiled to yourself after putting your daughter to sleep, you brushed the hair out of her face and you could see her strong resemblance to her father, Jeon Wonwoo, your loving husband who never missed a day without telling you how much you mean to him and how much he loves you.

You walked back to your bedroom and continued planning for y/d/n’s 3rd birthday. Recently, she became really interested in fairies so you and your husband decided to throw a fairytale-themed birthday party. You were scrolling through pinterest to find a nice backdrop when your phone suddenly rang, you looked at the caller ID, ‘Vernon’, why would he call you at this time of night? Knowing it has to do with your husband, you quickly answered it.

“Hello?” “Y/n! Thank God you answered-” in the background, you could hear multiple gunshots, “Vernon! What’s going on?! Is Wonwoo okay?!” “-H-he got shot! This fucking gang came out of nowhere and they fucking outnumbered us,” you shut your eyes and rubbed your temples, this was what you and your husband fought about all throughout your entire relationship. You’ve always told him to leave this stupid gang of his, but he never listened.

“Vern, get him out of there, please, just go to the hospital before anything worse happens.” Vernon dropped the call and you prayed that they get to the hospital in time. You called your sister who lived not far from you and asked her to watch Y/d/n to which she happily agreed.

Vernon texted you to which hospital they were at and you quickly jumped in your car and drove as fast as you could. On the way there, you couldn’t help but let out a few tears. You knew that this would happen one day, but Wonwoo just had to be so stubborn and wouldn’t listen to you.

“It’s not just some cheap gang, Y/n! We formed a pact!” He would defend, “Well, that pact of yours is going to be the death of you!”

You let out a frustrated grunt and gripped the stirring wheel tighter. Tears stinging your eyes, you hoped to every god out there that this wouldn’t be the death of him. He was strong, he will make it.

When you got inside the emergency room, you saw Vernon, Minghao, and Mingyu wrapped in bandages. “Where’s my husband?!” you demanded as you approached them, you didn’t hate them, they were nice people, but the thought of them being the reason why Wonwoo got shot angered you.

“Y/n calm down-” “I can’t calm down Mingyu! My husband got shot! Do you just expect me to go gather flowers and throw them around while singing merry-go-round?!” you eye twitched and you felt the nurses pulling you and telling you to relax.

Before you could beat the boys up, who were already in a bloodied state, the doctor appeared, “Are you the patient’s guardian?” “Yes, I’m his wife.” “He’s finally stable,” you and the boys released a sigh of relief and you felt a weight lifted off your shoulders. “thankfully, he was rushed here fast enough, and we were able to get the bullet out of him.” “Thank you, doctor. May I ask where my husband is?”

“He’s still inside the ICU, he still hasn’t woken up but he will, sooner than expected” all of you thanked the doctor and you leaned over Vernon’s bed, you looked at them and gave them a small smile.

“thank you, if it weren’t for you, he wouldn’t have made it.” they all just nodded and lowered their heads, “Look, I’m sorry I lost my cool earlier, I-I was just scared,” “We understand, Y/n, I would’ve felt the same if I were to stand in your shoes.

When Wonwoo finally woke up, you were sleeping at his bedside. You jolted awake when he suddenly pulled his hand away, "Honey! You’re awake, thank God!” you went to hug him but he swatted you away. You looked at him confusedly, is he blaming you for what had happened to him?

“W-who are you?” he abruptly sat up and groaned in pain, “Honey, it’s best if you just lie down-” “No, don’t touch me,” he grabbed his bandaged head and hissed. You felt offended but you let it slide because you understood his situation. However, the next three words that left his mouth made your heart stop.

“W-who am I?”

—–

You watched Wonwoo’s sleeping figure with a sullen look, they had to put him down because he thrashed around and even threatened to kill you earlier. You turned to the doctor who was looking at your husband with interest.

“Doctor, can you explain to me what’s happening to my husband?” the doctor sighed and turned to look at you, “we really hoped it won’t turn out this way, but it’s best to tell you,” you nodded and urged him to continue.

“Your husband was shot in the head, the bullet didn’t go in that far but it unfortunately hit his prefrontal cortex, which is one of the parts in our brain that is in charge with our cognitive behavior. However damaging it could result to a momentary memory loss and sudden changes in behavior such as aggression, to which your husband had shown earlier.” You felt as if your soul left your body after the doctor finished explaining.

You felt tears stream down your face as you looked at your sleeping husband, what were you going to do now? How will you move forward as a family when something as cruel as this happened to Wonwoo? He didn’t deserve this.

“What should we do, Doctor Choi?” “Thankfully, after running some tests, we have come up to the conclusion that your husband is suffering from Post-traumatic Amnesia, it usually happens when the victim experienced a traumatic event and in your husband’s case, a bullet in the head.”

“So what can we do to help him?” “He will be given certain medicines to quicken his recovery, but there’s no saying when he is going to restore all of his memory, PTA may last for a few minutes, hours, days, or weeks, but there are rare cases that it will last for months. Let’s just hope it’s not the last one.”

The doctor advised you to stay at the hospital for awhile so they can monitor your husband, you brushed the hair out of Wonwoo’s sleeping figure and felt your chest tighten when you remembered the rest of Doctor Choi’s advice.

“The behavior he will exhibit during the healing process can and will be distressing for those around him, he may ask things repeatedly, which will be wearing and there will be times that he will just wander around asleep or even when he’s awake. Make sure he always stays in quiet and peaceful places, and lastly, medicine will help him but the best medicine of all is to be patient with him.”

You didn’t know what to do, how do you expect yourself to take care of a three-year old and an ill husband at the same time? Everything was stressing you out but when you looked at your wedding ring, you were reminded by your vows 'in sickness and in health’, now is not the time to leave him. You stared at your husband as you choked out a sob.

“We’ll get through this together, Wonwoo, as a family.” you said and fell asleep beside him. Few days have passed and the doctor was right, he did exhibit strange behaviors, such as; yelling and hiding as if he was being targeted, it pained you to see him this anxious and distressed. But thankfully, his friends came and helped you out, they came in twos or threes and told Wonwoo stories, excluding him being a part of a gang and the cause of his injury because the doctor said it would be better to leave out that information as of the moment.

After two weeks, you were free to go home, Wonwoo didn’t ask questions as much as before so that means he was getting better. You thanked God for your darling of a sister who helped take care of Y/d/n when you were away.

——-

When your daughter saw you at your doorstep, she quickly ran towards you, her little legs causing her to stumble here and there. You picked her up and showered her with kisses, “Who’s mommy’s baby girl?” “I am!!” she giggled when you repeatedly kissed her neck, yelling 'it tickles mommy, stop’.

“Daddy!!” she reached out towards Wonwoo who looked at you and waited for approval, you nodded your head and handed Y/d/n to him. “I missed you, Daddy. Where have you been?”

“Daddy and I were busy that’s why Aunt Y/s/n took good care of you, did you have fun?” she bobbed her head up and down, grinning widely which showed her missing tooth. You thanked your sister who said it was okay and was always ready to help, and then went on her merry way. Night came and you put Y/d/n to sleep, you showed Wonwoo to your bedroom after you helped him clean himself.

“I could sleep on the sofa, you can have the bed,” you offered, you were still unsure if he was okay with sleeping next to you. “Can you sleep with me? I’m scared to be left alone,” you could see fear in his eyes and it broke you, Wonwoo was the type of man that barely showed any signs of fear, but right now, you could see how vulnerable he actually is. You agreed and went to bed with him, you put a pillow between you and him so he won’t feel uncomfortable.

“You’re my wife, right?” you were quite surprised at his question, is he starting to forget information again? “Yes, I am,” “then there’s no need for this pillow, you can sleep next to me.” his current state warmed your heart, it reminded you of a child that was seeking for comfort. You lied down next to him and he wrapped his arms around you, clinging onto you like a child would to his mother.

You were awoken by the empty space next to you, you rubbed your eyes and looked at the time: 2:39 AM. You shot up out of bed and looked around the room, did Wonwoo have another episode? You went out of your room and called out for his name, you became terrified when he didn’t answer, what if he wandered outside?! What if he got hit? what if- your thoughts were interrupted when you saw a light in the kitchen. You carefully tiptoed and saw Wonwoo’s back staring at the lit up stove, you quickly turned on the lights and ran towards him to turn off the stove.

“Wonwoo! Are you okay?! Are you hurt?” you frantically asked and searched his body for any burns. “Y/n,” you looked at him, it was the first time he called you by your name, usually he would just call you ’wife’ like he was labeling you, but hearing your name roll off his tongue shocked you.

He stared at the stove for awhile and turned to look at you, “I remember that I cooked in this place,” he remembered? you felt tears trickle down your face and you chuckled as you cupped his face. “Yes you did cook here, you were an amazing cook, Wonwoo.”

He looked at you as his own tears filled his eyes, “I-I remember you and Y/d/n sitting there,” he pointed towards the kitchen table, “And I was serving you pancakes, Y/n! I remember something!” he laughed and twirled you around which caused you to yelp. He held your face as a soft smile formed on his face.

“You’re so beautiful, I want to remember more of you.” you rested your face against the palm of his hand and reached out your own to cradle his face.

“You will, my love, you will remember everything and Y/d/n and I will be here to help you every step of the way, as a family.”

He hesitantly leaned towards you until his lips hovered yours, you could feel his breath and it tickled you, sending electricity to the soles of your feet. You locked your lips together and it felt like the first time you two shared a kiss.

He may not remember all of your memories now, but slowly, it will all be restored as you make new ones for days to come, because love is sweeter the second time around.

#seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #seventeen imagines #seventeen x reader #seventeen #svt angst #svt x reader #svt fluff #svt scenarios #svt #svt wonwoo #seventeen wonwoo #wonwoo x reader #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo fluff #wonwoo angst #jeon wonwoo x reader #wonwoo imagines #gang au #kpop angst #kpop fluff #kpop imagines #kpop #bangcrizpychan

[limjaeseven]

Don’t Wanna Know (5/8)

VERSE 2: PART 5 OF 8

Pairing: Jinyoung X Jaebeom ft Seulgi of Red Velvet

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Word Count: 2,064

Summary: Jinyoung gets casted in his first mainstream movie and he wants to tell Jaebeom about it. The elder never picks up his phone.

Warning(s): Mentioned cancer, sad JJP

Jinyoung had hoped that they would stop ghosting each other after their fight in high school but that didn’t really happen. They had always bickered and argued, being complete opposites but after that first fight, Jinyoung didn’t think he could take anything like that ever again. He remembered those four months of ignoring Jaebeom because looking at his face hurt.

The words tore him apart, but what was worse was the way Jinyoung could see Jaebeom beating himself up. From the dark circles to the short tempered attitude, he knew that Jaebeom was hurting just as much as he was but the things that he said held Jinyoung back from comforting him. He wondered when things would get better and though they eventually did, it was a painful journey.

Their next time they didn’t talk to each other for a while happened after they graduated from college. They had been living in the same apartment for almost four years and had gotten good jobs at respectable firms, Jinyoung having signed with a small acting company and Jaebeom with a production house. Things were going well till Jaebeom told him he was in love.

Seulgi was her name, she was an intern at the production house and the most beautiful woman Jaebeom had seen. He spoke of her endlessly to Jinyoung, who just felt the strong urge to bury himself alive. Jinyoung had known he was in love with Jaebeom for years. It wasn’t even that he liked men, he just knew that he wanted no one but Jaebeom.

He remembers the first time he got her home, she was one of the nicest people Jinyoung had ever met, making it impossible for Jinyoung to hate her, and most importantly, she made Jinyoung happy. Jinyoung had never seen Jaebeom smile like that, like the weight that he forever carried on his shoulders had vanished and been replaced with a cloud.

They went out a lot, Seulgi never staying over mostly for Jinyoung’s benefit. She lived alone so Jaebeom spent most of his time at her apartment. Shared breakfasts with Jinyoung became texts letting him know that he’d spent the night at her house and driving together to work became apologies about needing to drop her somewhere.

Jinyoung hoped that it would fade, despite the fact that Jaebeom was happy, a selfish part of him wanted them to breakup, sending Jaebeom rushing back to him. The other part of him weighed down with guilt over those thoughts. It was a vicious cycle of jealousy and self-hatred that made Jinyoung feel like he was drowning.

The world came crashing down on Jinyoung when Jaebeom announced that they were moving in together. Jaebeom was leaving him for good, Jinyoung thought. He knew that he wasn’t actually going anywhere, they were still best friends and nothing would ever come between them but for Jinyoung’s brain it was a big red signal telling him that he wasn’t needed anymore.

“Isn’t it too fast, hyung? You’ve only been dating for six months” Jinyoung didn’t know if he was trying to reason with Jaebeom or himself.

“I barely come here anymore, half my clothes are in her wardrobe. I know it’s faster than usual but I think she’s the one, Jinyoungie” And Jinyoung believed his words. The look in his eyes told him that this was it, the woman he was going to marry, he could already picture them with two little kids in his head. It took everything for him to not fall to the floor from the sheer emotional exhaustion.

Packing was much easier than Jinyoung thought it would be, he hadn’t noticed the way that most of Jaebeom’s possessions were already gone. He didn’t know if it was ignorance or denial on Jinyoung’s part but Jaebeom had found someone he wanted forever. He had known that it wouldn’t be just the two of them forever, he knew that eventually they’d have to find their own paths in life but this was all too soon.

Jinyoung cried that night, as he sat on the floor of Jaebeom’s empty room. He couldn’t imagine living alone, even when Jaebeom wasn’t at home, Jinyoung could at least walk in there, smell his perfume on the clothes, fell his presence in the space but now it just felt sad.

They met less and less as time passed by, their lives packed with work and love for Jaebeom. Jinyoung moved into a smaller apartment closer to his workplace, unable to sleep without Jaebeom across the hall from him in their old home. The housewarming party was just Jaebeom, Jinyoung and a bottle of wine, which was only for the younger since Jaebeom had sworn off alcohol.

Then came the day that Jinyoung got casted in his first movie, it was a medium budget rom-com and Jinyoung was only a supporting character but it was still a big deal to him. He had tried to call Jaebeom to tell him about it but the elder never picked up his call. Desperately wanting Jaebeom to come meet him on set once he called and called but it was never answered.

Months passed by and the shooting wrapped up, but there was still no contact from Jaebeom. He tried going to his apartment only to be told he had moved out months prior. That’s when the despair really kicked in, Jaebeom didn’t want him anymore, he didn’t even bother telling him he was moving out. As a last resort, Jinyoung went to Jaebeom’s workplace, just to talk to him once and he wasn’t there. He saw Seulgi but she looked uncomfortable as she spoke to him.

“Where is hyung?” He asked, desperate for answers.

“I’m sorry Jinyoung but Jaebeom can’t meet you right now, he’s been quite busy and wants no distractions” He could tell she was lying, Seulgi wasn’t a good liar.

“Can you just give these to him?” Jinyoung handed over two tickets for the premiere of his film to her before leaving. He still didn’t receive any calls from Jaebeom, things were over between them forever, he thought.

Jinyoung didn’t realise how quickly the day of the premiere came. He felt like he was dying as he donned on his brand new suit and walked down the red carpet with his co-stars. His smile didn’t reach his eyes as he looked into the cameras, his jokes not carrying any of the energy. The seat he had reserved for Jaebeom and Seulgi was just down the row and no matter how many times he checked, there was no one there. Even after the movie started, Jinyoung hoped that they would come in, apologising for being late and congratulate him afterward for his achievement.

He received compliments from his colleagues and critics alike who attended the screening but he didn’t hear any of them. He put up his act long enough for him to exit the building from a side exit, away from the public eye.

The tears welled up the moment he was alone, Jinyoung’s body growing weak as he let the events of the previous hours sink in. It had probably been the most important moment in Jinyoung’s life, and Jaebeom didn’t come. He tried to walk around outside the theatre a bit to get some air but his lungs felt like they were full of water. He struggled to breathe, his legs moments from giving away.

Every attempt at rationalising Jaebeom’s actions failed and Jinyoung realised that he was fighting a lost cause. Breathing deeply, he reached his hand out to hail a taxi. Just as he was stepping into the vehicle, he thought he heard his name being called out, it sounded like Jaebeom’s voice. He didn’t turn back though, he just scolded himself for fabricating his presence because there was no way Jaebeom was there.

It had been two days after Jinyoung’s housewarming party that Jaebeom collapsed at work. He was in the middle of directing a scene for a music video when he just crumbled and fell, fortunately one of his co-workers caught him before he could hit his head on the ground.

Seulgi had been nearby at the time and accompanied him as he was rushed into the hospital. Jaebeom had changed his emergency contact from his parents to her just to make sure Jinyoung wouldn’t find out about his condition. Seulgi knew, he had told her that early into them dating, letting her know that he wouldn’t be around for too long. He had also made her promise to never tell Jinyoung.

She had waited outside the ICU for nearly four hours before the doctor came out to tell her what was wrong but all she could hear was ‘worse’ and ‘not much time’ through the cloud of fear surrounding her. He had let her know that he was unconscious but she could meet him when she heard Jaebeom’s phone buzz next to her. She had received it from one of the nurses who had seen it fall out of his jacket pocket as he was wheeled in.

Seeing Jinyoung’s caller ID terrified her, what was she supposed to tell him? She hoped that if she didn’t answer he would not call again but the calls kept coming. Scared, she blocked his number, making a mental note to tell Jaebeom when he woke up.

But he didn’t wake up, not for a while. His body grew weaker in the days he was at the hospital, his body waiting to succumb to his condition. Their apartment was too far away from the hospital for Seulgi to travel back and forth everyday so with the help of her parents she moved into a place nearby after being informed that Jaebeom could easily be admitted for months.

And that he was, it was three months till he was discharged. It took another few weeks for him to finally come back to normal. He finally got a hold of his phone the day of the premiere but was surprised to see no calls from Jinyoung.

“Did Jinyoung not even call me once?” He mused. He asked Seulgi about it who had completely forgotten about blocking Jinyoung and she apologised profusely as he told her about what she had done. Though he tried to empathise with her actions he was mad beyond belief. He knew he would have hurt Jinyoung immensely by just disappearing off the face off the earth for months.

He tried to call Jinyoung but his phone was switched off. Dejected, he headed to bed to get some rest but just as he was about to turn the lights off he noticed two tickets on the bedside table. He had never heard of the movie mentioned on the tickets and was confused as to why they had premiere tickets to the show.

Looking up the name of the film on his phone, Jaebeom felt his entire world come crashing around himself. Park Jinyoung, his Jinyoungie was listed as one of the cast members. Jinyoung had finally been casted in a movie and Jaebeom had missed its premiere.

The screening started at 7 pm and it was nearly ten, Jaebeom cursed out loud as he rushed to throw on some clothes, he hoped Jinyoung was still caught up in the interviews so that he could at least show his face at the event. He ignored Seulgi as she asked him where he was going and hopped into his car, driving as fast as he could.

Parking his car outside the theatre, he noticed the press interviewing the main cast in the lobby of the theatre but Jinyoung was nowhere to be seen.

“Lim Jaebeom?” One of the staff members called out as they noticed his presence.

“Have you seen Park Jinyoung anywhere?” He asked them, panic rising in his body.

“He didn’t look very well, told me he was going home early. He just left so you might still be able to catch him” They pointed in the direction where Jinyoung had gone and Jaebeom thanked them before running full speed to catch up with Jinyoung.

“Jinyoung!” He shouted out as he saw Jinyoung step into a taxi. The younger hesitated for a moment and Jaebeom waited for him to turn around, but he never did. Jinyoung quietly climbed into the car and drove off, leaving Jaebeom panting on the sidewalk.

#got7 #got7writerscollective #got7creators #got7 fanfic #got7 jb #got7 jaebeom #got7 mark #got7 jackson #got7 jinyoung #got7 youngjae #got7 bambam #got7 yugyeom #got7 smut #got7 angst #got7 fluff #jb #jaebeom #jaebum #jinyoung #yugyeom

[myhauntedsalem]

20 Doctors And Nurses Share The Creepiest Last Words Uttered By A Patient Before Dying

1.

I work in a cardiac ICU. We had a patient who had a pulmonary artery rupture (a rare, but known complication of a Swan-Ganz catheter). One minute he was joking around with us and the next bright red blood was spewing out of his mouth. His last words before he died were “why is this happening to me?”

It still haunts me years later.

2.

I’m an RT and had a vented trach patient in angio have the same thing happen. Vent waveforms got a little funky showing she needed suctioned. I walked up to her and saw bright red blood just start shooting up the vent circuit and immediately obstruct it.

I immediately said “she’s hemorrhaging” and the vascular surgeon said “no it’s just a little blood” thinking I was referring to his access site in her groin.

I popped her off of the vent and blood just started pouring out of her trach, mouth, and nose. She looked at me and said, “just let me die.”

The puddle of blood was about 6 feet in diameter on the floor within just a couple of minutes and I was covered from the chest down.

I’ve seen some shit, but that was the worst,

3.

“But I don’t know how to get there…” Grandpa in hospice. Hadn’t spoken in days. Died about 2 hours later.

4.

I’m a nurse and was previously working at an assisted living community on the dementia/Alzheimer’s unit. My very favorite patient had been declining pretty steadily so I was checking on him very frequently. We would have long chats and joke around with each other, but in the last two weeks of his life, he stopped talking completely and didn’t really acknowledge conversation directed at him at all.

I finished my medication rounds for the evening and went to see him before I left. I told him I was leaving for the night and that I’d see him the following day, and he looked me in the eyes and smiled SO genuinely and said, “You look like an angel.” I thought it was so sweet because he had not seemed lucid in weeks.

He died the next morning. It really messed with me.

5.

I overheard an old lady whisper this to her old husband dying of kidney problems.

“You are going to beat this, you got away with murder, this is nothing”

6.

Nurse here – had a patient come into the ER with shortness of breath. He started deteriorating in the ER, and then quite rapidly on the transport up the ICU. We got him wheeled into his room, replaced the ER lines and tubes with our own, and transferred him from the transport stretcher to his ICU bed.

He actually did most of the transfer himself. He didn’t say anything, but just before he died he pleasantly adjusted his own pillow, laid his head down, and then his eyes went blank. This man just made himself comfortable before laying down to die.

7.

Dad had MS. He’d had it since he was 18. Diagnosed at 20, married my mom at 24, had me at 29, died 15 days short of 45. Six months before that, he was put on hospice. He and Mom were discussing funeral arrangements, and my mom jokingly said, “You know Tim, the best thing you could do would be to die on a Wednesday. That way we can have the body prepared on Thursday, the viewing on Friday, and the memorial on Saturday, so more people could come.

The morning we got the call that it was time, my mom, two sisters, and I were about five minutes too late. After we said our goodbyes, the nurse pulled my mom aside and asked if that day had any significance. It’s not even 6 am yet, so Mom doesn’t even know what day it IS much less if it’s important. The nurse tells her it’s May 21st. No… nothing is coming to mind.

The nurse told her that the previous day he kept asking what day it was and they’d tell him it was the 20th. He’d look irritated but accept it. That morning, he asked what day it was, and they said, “It’s Wednesday, May 21st.” He smiled, squeezed his favorite nurse’s hand, and was gone almost immediately.

It was Memorial Day weekend, and we did just as he and Mom had planned. And despite many friends being out of town for the holiday, we had over 250 people show up at the memorial service, overflowing the tiny church more than it had ever been filled. To his dying day, he was trying to make things easier for our family. I miss him.

8.

My grandfather on his deathbed said “they have no eyes,” still give me chills.

9.

“Get home safe, little one.” It wasn’t what he said – he said the same thing to me any time I had him as a patient for the evening. It was how he said it. He gave me this look and pause like he knew. The DNR’s in my experience, always know when it’s time. It’s creepy.

10.

Checked in on a patient before the end of my shift and she was in good spirits, had been joking with me the whole time. Her condition was tenuous (new trach) but she had been positive throughout. I asked how she was doing and she replied by singing “The old gray mare ain’t what she used to be” and wished me a good night.

I came in the next morning and she had coded and died overnight.

11.

Came into an early shift and was handed over a patient who’d been very anxious and had a panic attack overnight. He was anxious all morning but obs all fine, ecg fine and so I just asked someone to sit with him to keep an eye on him/reassure him for me. He gets worse, really panicky, heavy breathing, he’s on his side in the fetal position.

Drs will be in in 10 minutes so I tell him I’ll get them to him as soon as they come in but ask if he’ll lie on his back for me to help his breathing. He tells me he won’t make it until they get here and that he won’t face the other way. Obs still all fine at this point but he’s more agitated so again I suggest he move position for comfort and that’s when he says, ‘I won’t make it until the Drs get here. If I turn to face the other way I’ll die’. He repeated this a few times to me.

He arrested literally as the Drs walked in and he died on the side he’d been refusing to turn to. I’m convinced he knew.

12.

I’m an apprentice funeral director. We went to a nursing home on a removal and as we were walking down the hall one of the patients got antsy and opened the door to his room and saw us walking with the stretcher.

“I’ll see you next week boys”

And guess who we had to pick up the next week.

13.

I found one of my “comfort measures only” patients standing at the side of his bed. It surprised me because he had been mostly unresponsive during my shift. I helped him back into bed and he asked me why all these people were in his room.

He suddenly became quiet again and I noticed he wasn’t breathing. He was a DNR so there wasn’t anything to do to try to bring him back. Looking back he may have been talking about me and the CNA that was helping me get him back into bed, but who knows what or who he was seeing the last minutes of his life. Still creeps me out a little when I think about it.

14.

I had a cousin that had cancer and died when he was a little kid. He once asked her mother why all these people visited and she said: “Because your cousins, aunts and uncles love you very much and want you to get better” and he answered, “I’m not talking about them, I’m talking about the ones that visit me at night.”

15.

My first hospice case. She was on morphine and started mock smoking. She looked at me, took my hand and said “please” in the most pleading voice I’ve ever heard. I sat with her body until the corner arrived. She has no friends or family. Only her lawyer showed up. I’ve only done one hospice case since.

16.

I’ve commented this somewhere before but it’s stayed with me! I’m an RN and while I was a student I was caring for a lady who had end stage renal failure, had a DNAR and was shutting down. We were having a little chat, well I was chatting away while helping her put on some lotion, when she stopped, looked over my shoulder and said, “Bill’s here love, I’ve got to go” and swiftly stopped breathing. Read her old notes and Bill was her deceased husband.

17.

DNR patient was on comfort cares. Was on a high dose of morphine and hallucinating. She would alternate between grasping for things not there and trying to climb out of bed. She was too unsteady to walk so my job was to sit in the room and make sure she was safe. She tried to get up and I went to ask her what she needed. She grabbed my arm and pulled me down towards her face and said, very angrily, “kill me”. That one fucked with me for awhile.

18.

Back when I was a CNA this one resident fell off a bike for exercise in pt and seized, they came to and became lucid and said, “I think I’m dying,” but everyone in the room assured her that wasn’t going to happen, she seized up and was dead within minutes.

19.

Last year: my grandfather started desperately pleading for his life with his German captors from WWII

The doctor present was smart and said in German: “You are free, Herr Caticature. You are free.” And then he died.

20.

I actually have 3 that stick out in my mind. An 83 year old woman that said “My mom’s here. Are we going?” She died a few minutes later.

Another older lady said “I think I’m going to die today…” we took vitals, everything seemed fine. She was stable. She had a heart attack a couple hours later. Not her last words, but the last she ever said to me.

The last one is definitely the creepiest. A nice old lady who told my CNA she wanted to wear all white. When asked why, she said “The man in black is here.”

She looked in the corner of the room. The CNA looked, but there was no one there. That’s when I came into the room. We asked her to describe what she was seeing and she said “he’s in all black, and he’s got a top hat on.” Then she whispered “and his eyes are red” while her eyes moved across the room to directly behind the CNA, like she was watching him move closer to us. She died later that night. But it was unexpected. That room creeped me out for a long time after that.

#20 Doctors And Nurses Share The Creepiest Last Words Uttered By A Patient Before Dying #paranormal #ghost and hauntings #ghost and spirits #haunted salem #myhauntedsalem

[dottedr]

Reunited - Rhodestead

-The day after Connor left Chicago med-

As Will walks through the double doors leading into the ED the next day, he spots Maggie at the nurse’s station and greets her. “Morning Maggie.” “Morning Will. What are you doing here? You are supposed to be at home resting.” “I came to see Natalie and Connor” Will replies while looking around the ED to see if Connor was there. When his eyes landed back on Maggie’s face, he noticed that her face fell at the mention of Connor’s name.

“Maggie what’s wrong?” He asked when he realised that she was not going to say anything. Maggie sullenly says, "Oh uh…You didn’t hear? Dr Rhodes quit yesterday." After hearing that Will asks, “What why? What happened?” “I’m not sure sorry Will”

Will sighed at that. “Thanks anyways Mags” Maggie nods at the reply and left to give orders to the doctors and nurses as an ambulance pulls up. Will then heads to the break room and tried Connor’s cell a few times, but the call goes straight to Connor's voicemail every single time.

Getting annoyed, he throws his phone onto the couch, plopped down next to it, and put his face in his hands. He was deep in his own thoughts when the door to the room opened and Ethan strolls in.

Upon spotting Will, Ethan raised his eyebrows and questions, “What are you doing here?” “I came to see how Natalie was doing and to thank Connor for his help yesterday but apparently he quit…without saying goodbye”

At that, Ethan's eyes soften a little and he moved towards Will and put a hand on Will’s shoulder before giving it a squeeze as a sign of comfort because he knew Will and Connor were close.

“Hey…I’m sure he knows you’re thankful for his help even if you did not say it. Now why don’t you head up to the ICU and visit Natalie?” “Y-yeah I’ll get going now.” Will stood up and started to make his way to the door but before he opened it, he turned back and called out. “Hey Ethan…thanks.” “No problem” Ethan replied with a small smile. Will smiled back, turned to the door, and left.

After visiting Natalie, Will headed to Connor’s apartment and knocks on the door only to find the landlord opening the door and no Connor. “Um hello. I’m looking for the guy that lives here, Connor Rhodes?” “Ah he moved out last night. He looked like he was in a rush to get out of here.” “Oh, I see…thank you.” The landlord closed the door and Will sighed before turning and headed back to his car and to his apartment.

-6 months later-

Everyday for the past 6 months, Will tried to reach Connor but with no luck. That is until one day, after a tiring and hard shift Will decides that he wanted to go to another bar that was not Molly’s. He was not in the mood to interact with anyone he knows. And it turns out, that decision might be the best he made that day.

Will enters the bar and he looks around before his eyes landed on a familiar face that made him freeze on the spot. It took a while for him to regain his bearings and he cautiously makes his way towards the said person. As he reaches the person, he managed to stutter out, "C-connor? I-is that you?" It was so soft that the said guy barely heard it.

Connor turned when he heard his name being called and froze as his eyes landed on Will who was standing right in front of him. The pair stared at each other for a while before Connor spoke. "Will" He then gestured to the seat next to him silently asking will to sit. Will moved to take a seat and silence enveloped them once again. They were both lost in their own thoughts as they each thought of what to say to the other.

Will could not stand the awkward silence anymore, so he blurted out, "Why did you leave?" Connor tensed and turned his head towards Will and looked into his eyes to try and gauge Will’s emotions but there was no emotion in his eyes.

Lots of thoughts ran through Connor’s head at that moment. He wondered if Will was angry with him or that maybe Will was disappointed that he had left all of them behind. He was snapped out of his thoughts when Will tapped him on the shoulder.

“Well?” Will questioned again. Will’s expression was still stone-faced so Connor could not figure out what Will was feeling. "Too many bad memories" Connor finally said. Will looked at him with the ‘You are joking right?’ expression and Connor shook his head “I’m not joking Will.”

Will sighed, “Alright, alright. But just so you know…the ED has not been the same since you left.” Then he whispered something that sounded like a “I missed you too” to Connor but it was so soft that Connor could not confirm if that were what he heard Will say. So, he asked “Sorry? I did not quite catch that last part.” Will panicked and stumbled around his words while he tried to hide it. Eventually managing to say that it was nothing. Connor raised an eyebrow at Will’s odd behaviour but did not say anything else.

They continued to talk for a while like the old times before Will noticed that it was getting late so he offered and asked Connor if he wanted to go to his apartment and continue the conversation. Connor shrugged his shoulders and replied, “Why not.” Will threw a couple of bills on the table to pay for their drinks and the pair made their way out of the bar to Will’s car. They drove in complete silence all the way to the apartment.

Once they stepped into Will’s apartment, Connor could tell that something was up. For one, Will was a nervous wreck the whole ride over and he kept fiddling with his jacket thinking that Connor would not notice and occasionally, he would turn and look at Connor briefly before turning away. Second, he also noticed that Will was looking everywhere except for him.

“Hey Will” “Will” “Will!” Connor shouted after he tried to get Will’s attention like three times. “H-huh? W-what” Will stuttered out after snapping out of his thoughts. “What’s going on in that head of yours Will? I have been trying to get your attention for the past couple of minutes.” Connor questioned.

“Oh, uh sorry just um thinking. It’s nothing.” Will responds. “Does not seem like nothing to me. Will what’s wrong? You know you can tell me, right?” Connor urges. Will nods his head at that but still avoids eye contact with Connor.

Connor moved and positioned himself so that he could make eye contact with Will. Once their eyes made contact, Will could see the worry in Connor’s eyes. He felt like something in him broke and he could not keep the secret from spilling out any longer. Will’s breath hitched in his throat and he unconsciously blurted out “I love you Connor.”

As soon as it was out in the open, Connor stared at Will in shock and Will lowered his head in shame and embarrassment. ‘Why did I say that he must think I’m disgusting. How did I even let that slip out’ Will thought to himself. After what seems like eternity, Connor breathed out "Will…look at me.”

Will did not react to what Connor said so Connor tried again. This time however Connor made his tone of voice sound firmer as if he were giving Will an order. Although it seems like Will was not affected by the change of tone as his head remained lowered.

Eventually Connor placed his hand on Will’s chin and Will recoiled his head backwards at the touch. Connor placed his other hand on the back of Will’s neck to stop him from shifting away more and lifted Will’s head so that Will was making eye contact with him.

As soon as their eyes found each other, Will immediately squeaked out a small "I’m s-sorry I-I didn’t mean to-" He was cut off by Connor who had leaned closer to his face as he captured Will’s lips with his own. Will’s eyes widened in surprise and shock before he kissed Connor back.

“I love you too Will” Connor says as soon as they pull away from each other. “Come back to Med Connor, we all miss you there. I miss you there.” Will murmurs as he gave Connor a small smile. “I know I know I miss everyone too it’s just…” Connor starts to say but trails off. “The memories” “Y-yeah.”

Will thought for a moment before suggesting, “If you won’t come back to Med can we at least go to Molly’s? Let everyone know you are doing fine.” Connor debated for a moment before responding, “I-I’m not sure I should. After how I left things, I do not think anyone would want to see me…” “No. You are wrong Connor. We all have been worried sick about you” Will admits.

“Hmm…fine maybe I will. But for now, how about we go to bed. If your shifts are still the same since I left, you would have work tomorrow.” Connor suggested. “Well nice to see you remember. And you’re not wrong I do have work tomorrow.” Will agrees while chuckling. They both headed to Will’s bedroom and got ready for bed. Will handed Connor some of his clean clothes so that Connor could change into them.

After that they both climbed into bed and Connor laid his head on Will’s chest while Will held his arm over Connor in a tight embrace. “Goodnight Will.” “Night Connor.” Will reached over to shut the lamp off and soon they both fell into deep sleep in each other’s arms.

#chicago med #rhodestead #will halstead #connor rhodes #one chicago #chicago-med-fanfic

[talenevertold]

I love your love – untie it, entwine it (A KoiTsudu Fanfic)

Genre: Angst, Romance, Fluff, Smut... but mostly smut... I counted the pages, yes, I know the percentage  

***   ***   ***

It bugged him that she didn’t know how much he wanted her.

Or rather, she knew… to an extent.

They’ve been married for five months now, Nanase knew he had healthy sexual drive towards her… It’s just… she never grasped just how MUCH and how OFTEN he wanted her! His little soft wife, the most positive person he ever knew, who believed the best in the worst of people, who believed in herself professionally more and more each day – somehow, she’d managed to bypass building her self-esteem as a woman completely! In her world, Kairi was a god living on a pedestal of light and love, and she wasn’t worthy of him. In any way, shape or form. Especially, form.

***   ***   ***

He hated that part of himself so much! That part that didn’t know how to communicate this powerful, all-consuming need to have her, and hold her, and protect her and make her happy! Words! He needed words and the ones he had would always end up stuck in his throat or come out twisted. Nanase would startle, her eyes wide with worry, apologize in a deep respectful bow and get very quiet for a while. And he could almost see how she’d make yet another note in her mental notebook called ‘How not to upset my perfect husband, Volume 7 out of XX’.

Kairi Tendo, brilliant cardio surgeon, all around smart guy, was so dumb when it mattered the most! He vowed to himself so many times to hold his temper, to leash his arrogance and treat her better than that… but it was so damn hard! That stupid advice from long ago – to let life and work mix up and enjoy the chaos – was finally bringing results and not the ones he’d hoped for! Nanase was his wife, the most precious person whose smile and kind heart was vital to his survival – and yet she was also his nurse, quite promising and quickly improving specialist who cared too much, meddled enough, sometimes stood in the way and ever so rarely made mistakes. Teaching her, even reprimanding her, was a part of his job. And his personality was well suited for this, for being brutally honest and quick to judge. But Kairi couldn’t shake off the feeling that the same way Nanase brought her love and care for him to work – he’d bring his ‘sensei mode’ back home.

***   ***   ***

He yelled at her this morning. She was taking off the night shift, he was taking on the day shift, they’d cross paths only for her to update him and his day nurse on couple of critical post-op patients they had in the ICU. She’d stumbled with couple of overly-scientific words, took few moments too long to find the blood work results – and before he could catch himself, the devil in him called Tendo Nanase stupid. Out loud. In front of people. For real, this time.

She flinched, bowed, finished her report quickly and left. Without raising her eyes to him. And it hurt so much! And the fact that Nanase avoided his eyes because she believed to have disappointed him hurt that much more!

He was a demon indeed! Now he understood! Vile creature redeemed only by the fact that he had an angel for a wife… Whatever has he done in his previous lives to deserve her? Because Kairi was confident he did nothing significant enough to deserve her in this one! Or, alternatively, what could she possibly have done to deserve him as a punishment? Probably, not the case – Nanase was too bright of a soul to work off any past sins. She was light. And he was the monster.

***   ***   ***

At lunch hour, the nurse brought in a package. With his lunch box and a note from his wife. ‘Hope you’ll like this omurice, sensei. I promise to strive to be a better nurse… and a better cook. Remember to take care of yourself as you are very important to your patients and to me. Love, Nanase’. She’d also doodled little hearts and a smiling kitten. His ever-so-positive wife was trying to cheer him up.

Omurice was ok, but considering Tendo didn’t have breakfast this morning, it was amazing! While chewing on the chicken fried rice, he though absentmindedly that Nanase didn’t know how to cook omurice not so long ago. She must’ve added it to the long list of things she needed to learn in order ‘to be a better wife’ after he’d complimented the omurice they had at the restaurant this weekend. His wife would spend every waking moment free of studying or cleaning on googling recipes – for whatever reason Nanase believed it was her wifely duty to keep their home tidy and her husband well fed. Or, rather, she believed these were the skills she could master enough. For the rest of her ‘wifely duties’ Nanase was genuinely and heartbreakingly grateful to Kairi for ‘settling’ and ‘accepting her inexperience, clumsiness and shyness’. And it bugged him to no end how utterly wrong she was in this particular aspect! Of all the things! THIS was not him ‘settling’ for her, THIS was what surprised him the most straight from the beginning, how it’d hit him like a truck and knocked the breath out of him and he still couldn’t make sense of how MUCH and how OFTEN he couldn’t see straight and function properly because his body was filled with the NEED for his wife!

***   ***   ***

It wasn’t always like this for him. Kairi was never shy or anything but natural arrogance prevented him from developing deep enough connections for them to become physical – up until his university days. When you’re dealing with life and death on daily basis, things like ‘long-term’ and ‘waiting for the right time’ become less meaningful and less constricting. Sex becomes causality, something people do to relieve stress and have a bit of hormone rush. That is not to say Tendo Kairi was mundane about it – he took time and effort to become exceptional in it too, if not for anything other than being efficient and considerate of his partners.

But after Minori… he just didn’t care enough about life in general, other than lives of patients in his care. His physical excretion was dedicated to jogging and his hormones were forced to take a really long vacation.

Up until the point he’d met Sakura Nanase for the second time in his life.

Kairi couldn’t exactly pinpoint the moment when his general aversion to her antics turned into mild curiosity, then to soft appreciation and then, out of nowhere and all of a sudden, into majestic rainbow of feelings and emotions. And the least one Kairi expected was desire. Primitive, possessive, gut-wrenching lust for a little shy virgin with baby deer eyes and all the trust of the world shining in them! Nanase was so far away from his type that, as he ran towards her, his ‘type’ got lost behind the horizon and all that was left was her. Her forever-blushing cheeks, her soft hair, her clean scent… and his need to possess all of it, day and night, just him and always more!

***   ***  ***

Tendo Kairi was a practical man and once he’d realized that his girlfriend, Sakura Nanase, was ‘it’ for him – he’d accepted it and moved on. He never argued with himself regarding his ‘type’ and ‘standards’, never looked for faults in her appearance or tried to compare her with anyone from his past. He was forever grateful to Nanase for waking him up and proving he wasn’t dead inside – and that included his male drive.

However, that awakening soon proven to be too much to handle for normally cold-blooded and composed doctor. His naïve and inexperienced girlfriend knew she drove him mad with her mishaps and quirks… but she had no idea she drove him up the wall with desire just by being present!

It was so hard when they’d started dating…

That first time he’d kissed her and felt his entire body respond to her closeness… and how he stood behind her door thinking of the reasons to come in and do more ‘medical treatment’ kisses all over her skin… but then… Nanase was so pure, so innocent, so shook with all the events of that day… and so he waited.

The time she got jealous of Miori and tried letting him go… and he wanted to kiss her tears away… lock her in his arms and dispel her worries with the heat building up in his body…

And then hotel room… Her innocent plea to be gentle for her first time… Kairi held his breath when he felt Nanase approaching him… he prayed fervently… for her to do something, ANYTHING, to give him an excuse to respond… but also for her to keep her distance because he wasn’t sure he could be gentle with so much fire burning inside of him. So, when Nanase wished him ‘good night’ and felt asleep immediately after, Tendo was somewhat relieved… and hugely disappointed. And the chaste kiss he gave her that night did nothing to quench his thirst… again.

These moments were piling up and up and up… Until one day, about a week after Sakura was discharged after her accident… they played Jenga.

***   ***   ***

Jenga was supposed to be innocent enough game, something to keep Tendo focused on something else other than the girl beside him. That fresh-out-of-the-shower, wearing-loose-sweater-over-sports-bra girl with her hair still slightly wet and her skin still slightly flushed from hot water. She smelled of soap and happiness and that scent was making Kairi light-headed and heavy in the same time. The way she was biting her lower lip when she’d focused on her next move… the tilt of her head and dreamy expression when she was watching him… how was any of that not intentional, Tendo didn’t know!

Right before he was about to take out another risky block, Sakura tagged on her sweater to wipe out droplets of water rolling down her collarbones and sighted:

-          I probably should dry my hair after all…

Kairi refocused his gaze on her fingers sliding across the collar of the sweater. He opened his lips to respond and realized his mouth was too dry to talk. Sakura’s palm traveled back to the back of her neck and she’d stretched, swaying a bit in her sitting position. She looked at him and asked:

-          Sensei, please, wait till I’m back before you make your move, I need to see which one you took.

He nodded still not capable of coherent sounds. Nanase stood up and made half a step towards her bathroom when her knees buckled and she felt back down, landing inches away from him. She tried to break her fall by grabbing Tendo by the shirt but only ended up bumping their foreheads together. Sakura yelped and rubbed her forehead quickly, all while chattering her apologies:

-          Ah, sensei, did I hurt you? I’m so sorry, my leg fell asleep and I stumbled and I..! I’m so clumsy, sensei, it was all my fault!

Her eyes were fixed on his forehead, assessing the damage she thought she’d caused. Sakura looked back into his eyes, her voice a little raspy with worry:

-          Do you have a headache? Feel dizzy? Loosing focus in your vision?

Tendo noticed her eyes searching his face – his little nurse was assessing him for signs of brain trauma. He was about to make a comment that her head, no matter how hard, could not have damaged him that much… and then a memory crossed his mind. He did the same thing tree weeks ago… searched her eyes for pupils dilation, checked her pulse… she assured him she was fine back then… and he trusted her… and almost lost her…

Barely visible scar on her forehead will soon fade and be concealed by the hairline. She was back to work already and perfectly healthy. Yet, he couldn’t shake off the dread that broke into his chest and froze over his heart. He could have lost her. Not a single doctor in their hospital told him ‘It’s going to be ok’. Because he would know they were lying. And none of them was sure enough to tell him the truth. He could have lost her.

Stark contrast between cold spreading through his limbs and her warm presence so near him made Tendo shiver. Nanase noticed and took her fingers off his forehead:

-          What is it, sensei? How can I help?

The sincerity, the plea in her voice, so gentle, so honest, so in love… broke the ice that was binding him. Tendo grabbed her by the waist and hugged her tight to his chest, making her straddle his thighs. Nanase stilled for a second and then instinctively tried to pull away, too embarrassed by this new closeness to male body. Kairi didn’t let go, instead borrowing his face into crook of her neck, inhaling deeply her sweet, pulsing scent. So intoxicating, so alive!

-          Shh, Sakura, please…

The girl in his arms stopped struggling and he felt her feather-like touch hugging him around the waist. She whispered softly:

-          Tell me, what do you need?

Kairi turned his head and planted soft kiss just behind her ear, eliciting half-sight, half-moan out of his beloved captive. He did it again, tracing kisses down her neck, feeling her chest rise and fall quickly as her breathing became quick and shallow. Sakura’s fingers clutched his shirt from behind, digging into his back and injecting his nerves with electricity and short-circuiting his muscles. Tendo clenched his teeth before he could bite the tender skin on her shoulder and said in barely audible voice:

-          Please… just… please…

Sakura brought one of her hands and rested in between his shoulder blades, patting his back a little. That was probably supposed to be reassuring and calming motion but seeing how it flushed her body against his and she was still straddling his thighs – it was anything but! Nanase, still frustratingly oblivious to the storm she was wrecking with her innocent movements, asked him again:

-          What? Sensei, did you say something?

Kairi straightened and caught her face in his palms, locking her eyes – her deep, baby-deer-big eyes – with his. There was no fear in them or discomfort – just trust and love, so, so much love! Kairi said in low steady voice, making sure she understood everything this time:

-          Stay. With me. Tonight… be mine.

She knew what he’d meant. Tendo felt her body stiffened as Sakura stopped breathing and her eyes shot even bigger than before. Something flashed across her face, something shy and scared. Kairi kissed her cheek, then the other, feeling her small form relax into his embrace. Her eyes were still worried though, so he asked softly not to spook her:

-          Do you… not want to?

It couldn’t be it, right? She tried to seduce him before, for God’s sake! But maybe… maybe it wasn’t the night? What if it wasn’t that ‘right time’ girls like her romanticized so much in their virgin dreams about Prince Charming? Or was it him… not being Prince Charming enough?

Nanase swallowed hard and Tendo’s heart stilled anticipating her answer:

-          I don’t want to, - Sakura bowed her head, averting his gaze and Tendo felt his blood stopping in his veins, - …disappoint you.

Tidal wave of relief almost knocked Kairi over and all the tension that was holding him in place escaped with a groan. He grabbed Sakura by the shoulders and shook her a bit, making her look at him again. It was still there, the fear he saw in her eyes! But his shy virgin girlfriend wasn’t scared of him or being with him this way – she was scared of herself! Of her inexperience… and her disappointing him.

To be honest, Tendo never engaged with younger women before specifically for this reason – he didn’t want the responsibility of being ‘the first one’ because of all the expectations and all the awkwardness attached. But with Nanase… his fragile and strong sakura flower… he cherished the honor of being the first one! And passionately hoped for the privilege of being ‘the only one ever’ in the future to come! To have her give herself only to him, to find his home inside her body and soul, to have and to hold… his Nanase, only his, his first and only Nanase!

Containing so much desire and love was getting too much for Kairi and he began to tremble. He closed his eyes, listening to blood thundering and beating like a drum in his head – his body’s demand to do something, ANYTHING, before he combusted!

Only then he looked at Sakura, realizing he still hasn’t said anything to her confession. She was biting her lower lip and glancing back and forth between him and the floor, waiting for some sort of judgement on her adequacy. ‘Am I not… sexy enough?’, his memory supplied. Why?! Why, oh, why would she ever doubt it? Did she not feel his body burning underneath her? Did she not hear his blood singing under her fingertips? Did she not see the hunger in his eyes, the primal need to devour here and now?

No, she didn’t. On the back of his mind, Tendo registered a snarky remark that experienced nurse was supposed to know the tell-tale signs of male arousal – especially, since he was showing all of them at once – but the bigger and smarter part of his brain shushed the demon away and supplied the answer – she really didn’t know! She wasn’t his nurse right now – Nanase was his girlfriend, young inexperienced woman he loved so much and wanted so badly his bones hurt! It would take some time for her – and some considerable effort from him – to show her just how sexy she was to him and how there was absolutely no way she could displease him in any way!

Tendo said, his voice hoarse and strangled:

-          Sakura… my, my Sakura! You can never, ever disappoint me!

-          But… um… sensei…

Tendo pressed a finger to her lips, momentarily transfixed with sensing her wet mouth under his touch. He rushed into the kiss, possessing her with unreserved passion, swallowing her surprised moan. Nanase swayed – not away from him but into him – and circled his neck, locking them into the frenzied kiss for as long as they could survive without air. Her lips parted in sigh and Kairi took the opportunity to taste her, to caress her tongue with his, inviting Sakura to respond. Her first movement was unsure, even lost… but Sakura was nothing if not persistent and eager to learn! She took her cues from Tendo’s labored breathing, groans rumbling deep in his chest – and soon she’d danced the dance too, meeting Kairi half-way, touch for touch and kiss for kiss!

Tendo broke away first, heaving like crazy and willing himself to release her hair – he must’ve left bruises on her sculp with how tightly he held her. But then again, she didn’t complain… Would she complain if he caused her pain?

Tendo shook his head to chase away this ugly thought and looked at Nanase. Evening settled around them and her face was only lit by the dim light of a nightstand lamp. Even so, Tendo could see that Sakura was bright shade of red and trying to blow some cool air down her chest without him noticing. Oh, he noticed! And no matter how proud Kairi was to bring her to this state over a short period of time, he was not about to cause his girlfriend a heat stroke on their first night together!

Kairi proposed tenderly, almost shyly, tugging on the hem of her sweater:

-          May I? Take this off, I mean…

He felt like he needed to add this little explanation as Nanase may think a whole range of things including him asking her to borrow the sweater. Tendo chose to be very specific about wanting to undress the woman in front of him and waited patiently for her to respond, still tagging on the sweater.

Nanase closed her eyes for a moment, her shoulders bunching in defensively… but when she’d opened them again, Tendo saw her determination to brace the challenge, as she nodded and raised her hands above her head. Kairi chuckled silently – his little hero was getting ready to be judged by him on the merits of her body and it probably took a lot to go for it like this – and he was more than ready to unwrap the gift he waited for since forever.

His hands dove under fabric to touch the warm skin. He started from the waistband of her sweatpants, palm tracing up the sides of her body, slowly, very slowly. Kairi tried to commit to memory the look on her face when he caressed her stomach with his thumbs… the way her eyes rolled a bit when he draw lines around the sides of her breasts… how Sakura leaned into him when he was tugging the sweater over her head… and then she was free. And he was doomed.

She was perfect. Sakura, his woman-to-be, was perfect. She wasn’t too thin, so no bones were sticking out anywhere – instead, soft curves of her belly immediately gave Tendo all kinds of biting fantasies and an urgent desire to mark her that way. Then he’d noticed she had a scar – just under the left collarbone – and Kairi made a mental mark to ask Nanase about it later. Her breasts, still clad in sports bra, were not too big and just the right size to fit into his palm – they teased him to check the fit right away with how they were dancing under his unblinking gaze and with Sakura’s nervous breathing. His hand twitched uncontrollably but stilled in the air. There was something he had to do before that… right? What was it?

Tendo looked at his hand suspended between them, looked at Sakura’s waiting face, noticed how she’d pressed her lips together as if trying to keep some words from spilling out – and it dawned on him. He exhaled, putting all the conviction and passion in his body into this answer to her unspoken question:

-          You are so beautiful, Sakura. And you are so sexy, I am… it’s hard to breathe…

His hand came back to his body, clutching the front of his shirt, trying to untie the knot of nerves and anticipation tangled in his chest. He looked back at Sakura, trying to see whether she’d believed him earlier – but she was looking at his chest, her eyes squinted, as if considering something. When Sakura met his gaze again, Kairi raised an eyebrow questioningly – was she really checking for some another symptom regarding his problems with breathing? Now?!

Sakura surprised him by touching her fingers to the top button on his shirt:

-          May I?

The problem with breathing may well kill him seeing how he’d stopped doing that altogether! Nanase… wanted to… undress him! Kairi nodded, both his hands falling to the floor beside him to ground in for the tornado spiraling around.

Sakura unbuttoned his short meticulously, practically, tugging a bit to get to the buttons hidden inside his suit pants. When the shirt finally split in the middle, she touched her right hand to Kairi’s throat, softly tracing the veins, the hollow, down the middle of his chest, circling the bellybutton – until she touched the belt buckle. Sakura followed the same path again, this time with both hands on his body, splaying her fingers wide to touch as much of him as she could. She didn’t go far for when her nails grazed his nipples, Tendo hissed and launched towards her. His vision was blurry, his body taught as a bow string – and his virgin seducer looked at him with almost scientific interest! Tendo licked her mouth and sucked in the lower lip, making Sakura dig her nails into his chest again. She whimpered in protest when Kairi released her but then he’d whispered into her lips:

-          Do it again.

Sakura tried kissing him but Kairi leaned back. She caught him by the neck, and he resisted still. He wanted something of her – and Sakura gave in:

-          Do what again?

Tendo unclenched her arms from around his neck and brought her hands to his chest. He leaned in, his lips brazing her shoulder, his voice low and needy:

-          Nails… again… please…

Instead, Nanase pushed him back so she could look at him and he could look at her. She crooked her head as if thinking something over, her fingers flexing ever so lightly over his flamed-up skin. Sakura bent her head, her lips trembling, and kissed one of the red marks on his chest, making Tendo throw his head up and moan loudly. He forgot all about his previous plea – wet sloppy kisses worked too, yes, please, more!

Sakura kissed him again, and again, and again… Tendo’s fingers grabbed shabby carpet so tight his knuckles became white – he was trying so hard to control himself when all he wanted was to throw her down on the floor and consume her whole, make her fall apart under his body, claim her!

His control was running out and Sakura was not making it easy for him – her touches, her kisses, wet traces she left with careful licks of his skin were leaving invisible marks all over his chest, exquisitely pleasurable marks of her claim over him! Not able to hold off any longer, Tendo let go of the carpet – and was stopped midway by his lover’s uncertain voice:

-          Will you… teach me?

Tendo shook his head to clear it up, looking incredulously at his amazing temptress – was she still doubting her ability to turn him on? He rushed to answer before Nanase took his gesture the wrong way:

-          There’s only one rule to his game, Sakura. I’ll teach you… but you will also teach me, ok?

The look of surprise and confusion would’ve been comical… if Tendo could see past the fact that she was half-naked and in his arms. Nanase asked, focusing on her palm laying on his chest:

-          What can I teach you? I don’t…

Tendo quickly bent his head to snatch the rest of whatever ridiculous statement she was about to make with a kiss. He said just as quickly to stop this line of self-doubt:

-          Teach me about yourself, Nanase. If I do something you like – tell me. If I do something you don’t like – absolutely tell me, immediately! Promise me!

Nanase raised her head and looked at him. Not saying anything. Kairi pressed on:

-          Sakura, please, promise me! I need to learn how to be with you so I can teach you how to be with me… Please…

And then Sakura smiled. And that wasn’t her shy smile, her humorous smile or even her happy smile. It was the one Tendo haven’t seen before… Sakura’s first woman’s smile. Mysterious and knowing and seductive as hell! If only she knew how much power she held over him!

Sakura said with a nod:

-          I promise. And…

-          And?

-          Sensei, all the things we did earlier… I liked.

And that smile again. Kairi wondered if she was using it deliberately already, commanding spasms all over his frenzied body at will. If she knew, she was damn good at it! If she didn’t know – she was a natural!

 Then Sakura did something unpredictable, yanking her bra off in one quick, practiced move and tossing it aside. Tendo bent in half as if from the gut punch and froze, his eyes fixated on her naked breasts perking up at him invitingly. His hands reached out automatically and stopped so close… so close he could feel magnetic pull of her flash on his fingertips, like static charge.

-          May I? – he asked, his voice hopeful, pleading.

Sakura answered simply but with so much weight in her voice, leaning into his touch and closing the short distance:

-          Yes, please…

That touch felt like a shot of strong alcohol, spreading liquid warmth from his fingers directly to his neither regions, making all the throbbing and tension in his pants even more painful and urgent. Tendo grinded his teeth, adamant to not let his primal male brain take over – but it was near impossibility with Sakura’s tender flash so close to him, so willing, so responsive! She arched into his palm, her head thrown back in a deep moan when his fingers squeezed her pebbled nipples and tugged a little. Her hands shot up and Sakura grabbed his shirt collar for leverage, making Kairi loose his balance and drop on top of her, pressing her to the floor. Nanase gasped when their bodies touched, feeling tingling sensation sparkling all over her skin. Tendo detached for just a second to yank off his shirt making Sakura whine at the lost of his intoxicating presence over her body. She reached out to him:

-          Sensei…

Kairi came back, laying between her bent legs, cradling her head with one hand and searching all the soft and sensitive spots he could reach to with the other. He explored with abandonment, lost in his own world built of Sakura’s trembling and crushed whispering. Sometime through the haze of desires, each one more demanding that the other, he’s heard Sakura call out to him:

-          Sensei…

He breathed out:

-          Yes?

-          Sensei… teach me…

She placed her hands over his shoulders and tentatively followed the outline of his back muscles, digging her nails in just a little, the way he liked it before. Tendo bit into her shoulder, buckling into her body and seeing sparks behind tightly shot eyelids. He growled:

-          Sakura… later… I won’t… last.

She stilled underneath him, still holding him tight in her arms. Her felt her lips brush over his chest when Nanase whispered:

-          Then… what? Do I…

-          Trust me.

-          Always.

Her answer was immediate even though he didn’t form it as a question. He would never ask her that for Kairi knew that his little brave angel trusted him unequivocally, beyond any doubt and reason. Still, this admission of her purest love for him made something shift in him, cooling him off in a good way, giving him enough clarity to hold on just a little longer.

Kairi licked over the bite mark on her shoulder, tracing down along her collarbone, kissing her openly and hungrily. Her breasts tasted so sweet, her cherry-stone nipples so sensitive under his tongue and fingers – Tendo drank in her cries, her hopeless pleas for more, and more, and more… The way she’d grabbed his hair and pulled down to bring his lips to her wanting body… The way her hips grinded against his erection making Tendo almost cry with pain and pleasure…

Kairi made his way down her body excruciatingly slow, making sure to taste every piece of it, savor every spasm and every incoherent sound she’d make, every convulsive tug of his hair… When he finally reached the waistband of her sweatpants, Tendo looked up at Nanase – her lips swollen, eyes hooded, her expression dazed. Before he could ask yet another ‘May I?’, Sakura raised her hips and let go of his hair, placing her hands of the floor for balance. Tendo worked her sweatpants together with her underwear off, not taking his eyes off her face, looking for any glimpse of fear or confusion. There weren’t any. Nanase looked at him with trust… and anticipation… and challenge… and that smile again.

Tendo’s nostrils flared. Predator in him, primal male creature, detected new scent, something to be hunted till the end of the Earth. He finally looked down, to the little arrow of dark-brown curls contrasting so fine with her pale skin. Her legs were slightly apart, just enough of an angle to see where this arrow was pointing to… little droplets of moisture glistening in the dim lights of the room. That was the scent. Her scent that was only for him!

Gods, have mercy on him! The need to taste her and drink her up battled with equally strong need to be inside her right now, to get lost in her, to never come back… need to conquer, to own, to mark! Sakura, his Sakura, only his!

Sakura… the saving thought dropped on him like a handful of snow… his needs would wait! Her needs were more important now… they were more important always.

Kairi touched his hand to the dark triangle, enjoying the soft feeling of tight damp curls under his fingers. He pressed with his thumb down in the middle and when Sakura’s hips jerked, Tendo knew he’d found what he was looking her. He circled the little nub of nerves, teasing her with pressure and then almost letting go. Sakura covered her mouth with her palm, trying to muffle screams reverberating through her body – but Kairi took it away, repositioning himself lay to the side of her, hoovering over her face, whispering his words into her trembling lips:

-          Don’t, Nanase. Let me hear you.

Her circled her clitoris again, and again, flicked it – and Sakura moaned into his mouth:

-          Sensei… inside…

With her right hand Nanase yanked him down into feverish, all-consuming kiss, threatening remnants of Kairi’s self-control. Her left hand pressed on the lower part of her belly, trying to squeeze out that nagging feeling of something burning inside of her. The feeling increased with every touch of Tendo’s smart fingers, every circle he made added another rotation on a spring winding deep in her body. That spring was connected to every nerve, every muscle, every thought and every emotion within her, jumbling everything up in a fiery pit between her legs, making her cry out and into him.

Kairi knew the feeling. He knew what was missing inside her. That part of him that was missing also knew that, fighting its way out of constricting pants and into her eager body. But for now – Tendo was stronger!

Answering Sakura’s non-verbal pleas, Tendo touched two fingers to her entrance, pushing them inside slowly, knuckle by knuckle. He could’ve started with one, but she was so wet already, so wet! Her walls pulsed around his fingers, while he explored more with pressure, curling his fingers experimentally. At one point, Nanase sucked in her breath and bit her lip – and so Tendo stayed there, pressing on, learning the inside of her body like an instrument. He knew he could’ve done it quicker and more effective with his tongue between her legs, but that would robe him of a sight – and Sakura was a sight to behold! Tendo wanted – ney, he needed – to remember her right now, the first ever time he brought her pleasure, the beginning of her journey as a woman. His woman! Sakura’s eyes were open, but he didn’t think she saw anything… She’d stop breathing and start again with a throaty inhale… her lips moved but sometimes he couldn’t hear a sound… and sometimes only her sounds existed – her ‘ahhh’ and ‘yeeeees’ and ‘pleeease’ and ‘more’… Kairi’s favorite was ‘more’. She trembled and thrashed in his half-embrace… and then she’d stilled in half-raised arch… The spring reached its limit and unwinded with thunder rocking her body, replacing every cell of her body with a speck of light! And the feeling was so foreign yet so natural, it broke her in pieces and healed her, leaving her with numbing buzz! She suddenly felt so tired… so spent… yet she still wanted more!

The sound from above made Nanase open her eyes – Tendo looked at her victorious… and smug… and he was sucking on his fingers… and then Sakura remembered where those fingers were just now. She squeezed her eyes shot and slammed her thighs together – and heard Kairi chuckle:

-          Too late, baka… I already know what you taste like!

Sakura shook her head vigorously denying this thought from entering her mind – this was too scandalous to think of! Too intimate… too hot… she wanted it too much! And Tendo was too good at giving her ideas:

-          Next time you invite me to the ‘cream party’, we’re skipping directly to desert…

Nanase moaned, feeling heat pulling in her abdomen again, collecting traces of pleasure lingering in her body. She opened her eyes bravely and caressed his chest, tracing the outlines of his abs down to the ridge of his pants. Kairi tensed at the touched and hissed at his lover:

-          Sakura, wait…

-          Why, sensei?

-          Because… um… Oh, for fuck’s sake!

He sat up, dropping her hands off his body and groaned in frustration, yanking his hair with both hands. Nanase set up too, covering her breast shyly with one hand and reaching out to him hesitantly:

-          What is it, sensei? Did I do something…?

Tendo didn’t let her finish and take blame for his own stupidity – he caught her hand, opened it and planted a kiss to her palm, cradling his face in it. Nanase felt he was burning up, tremors shaking his body in waves – yet he tried breathing deeply to calm down. Why?

-          Sensei?

Barely audibly he said, apologetically:

-          I didn’t take any condoms… it was just a Jenga game… And Ryuko is home, I can’t go there like this…

By the end of it Kairi was almost crying, letting go of fantasies of her body around him. Until she took his face in both her palms and raised it to look at him:

-          Sensei, we’re both healthy, we’d just had our medical checkups and…

-          Nanase, it’s not only for…

-          … and I’m on a pill.

Tendo gulped, his eyes widening with found possibilities. Nanase took it as a question and rushed to explain:

-          It’s the hormonal treatment for…

-          I don’t care, - Tendo fell onto her, knocking her to the floor and swallowing the rest of her explanation with a deep searing kiss.

He did care. Kairi made a mental note to check on her medical condition later, consult with doctor Akai, their hospital’s top gynecologist, on whether it was the best treatment plan for whatever ailed her… but not now… now he was unimaginably grateful for this stroke of luck because it meant he didn’t have to stop now.

Kissing her felt different now. Now Tendo knew what she tasted like and could feel the notes of her intimate taste all over her skin. The scent of her arousal, tangy and spicy, tickled his nostrils, making his head spin as if he was drunk. He was drunk, actually – drunk on her naked body, splayed so openly beneath him, drunk on her hands drawing patterns on his skin, drunk on her touch when Nanase reached out and took hold of his belt buckle…

-          May I? – she whispered, mirroring his words from before.

Tendo buried his face in the crook of her neck, inhaling deeply and trying to calm the frenzy ranging in his chest. Was he ready for this? For her hands so close to where he wanted them the most? Would he be able to take it?

Having decide to test himself, Kairi stood up, taking Sakura by the hand to help her rise up. Sakura kneeled before him, sitting back on her heels, her hand reaching out to his belt again. Tendo nodded.

Sakura unbuckled the clasp, slightly surprised how smooth her movements were, as if she wasn’t shaking head to toe from the anticipation of what she was about to uncovered. Maybe, it was her medical training – she did undress people before, many times – or maybe she was already in the eye of the hurricane, where everything was deceptively calm and only whistling sound in her ears reminded her that she is about to be snatched off the ground into dangerous whirlwind of their combined passion. Shaking her head to focus on the task at hand, Sakura repeated Tendo’s approach from before, easing both his pants and underwear off his hips and letting them drop, pooling around his ankles. Kairi stepped out slowly and shoved the clothes aside – and stilled again. Sakura followed that movement and then raised her eyes up, slowly, admiring her sculpted calves, thighs and then…

Sakura saw naked men before; she was a nurse after all. But not anyone who was beautiful… and so visibly wanting. His male member throbbed and jumped a bit under her gaze, vain bulging alongside its very impressive length. Nanase suddenly felt her mouth watering just thinking of what it would taste like… if she were only to taste a little… just a tip…

Tendo’s hands, clenched in tight fists, were glued to his sides, stopping him from touching her. He waited for Sakura’s inspection to be over, giving her time to get used to him like this. But when he saw Nanase licking her lips, reaching out to him, to that part of him – he intersected her hand immediately! Sakura looked at him questioningly, her voice sounding from afar, as if she was lost in some hypnotic trance:

-          Why? I thought it was my turn…

Kairi saw a white light furiously flashing across his sight and his knees almost buckled. Her touch – he wanted it so much! But… but…

-          Because I would die, Nanase. I’ll explode…

She bit her lip, not sure what to do next. Tendo leaned in and raised Sakura by the waist, making her sit on the bed. Crouching before her, he kissed her lips, her arms, taking more time to thoroughly lavish her breasts in licks and kisses and bites – until her body relaxed from the disappointment of his refusal and she leaned back inviting him to continue. Tendo said softly, in between covering her skin with imprints of his mouths:

-          This time… I will… love you. Next time… you can… if you want to… love me.

Sakura didn’t quite understand that suggestion but was willing to go with whatever – as long as it meant this tension inside her kept rising as it did now… and long as his body was melting into hers like it did now… as long as his kisses were getting closer and closer to…

-          Agh… sensei… unnnn… what… aaaah… are…

-          Shh, Nanase… all of you… is mine.

Her taste was stronger than before, more vivid – it was burning him with white fire, bringing him pleasure he didn’t know was possible on the giving end of this play. Her fingers, lost in the trusses of his hair again, flexed in unison with her body movements, instinctive waves of her hips to press into his mouth. Tendo hummed and the vibrations translated into Sakura’s scream, broken and commanding:

-          More!

And this time, he had more! Kairi gave her one more wide lick and then covered her body, pressing Sakura into bed. Her legs circled his hips, aligning them perfectly, and they both felt when his hardness found an entrance to her wet softness. Tendo slowed down to a glacial pace, savoring the feeling of her body enveloping him, tugging him in, inviting… until he reached that resistance barrier, natural protective layer of her virginity. He tried warning her:

-          Nanase…

She nodded immediately and raised her hips as much as she could being weighted down by his body:

-          Come.

-          Nanase… it will…

-          I know.

-          Nanase… I can…

-          Kairi… come!

He wanted to say he could wait a little longer, letting her adjust to him. But hearing Sakura say his name, for the first time… exhaling it with so much love and tenderness… undid him. Tendo fell into her… her deep, waiting, accepting body, her warmth and passion… her whole self. His Sakura, his.

She jerked and he heard her whine. Something hot and wet touched his cheek, Tendo tuned and caught a glimpse of a single tear rolling down the side of her face before she looked away. Guilt took a squeezing hold of his heart for he has hurt the woman he loved, though it could’ve not been avoided. He pleaded, showering her face, her hair, her neck with kisses:

-          Nanase, my precious one, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… please, forgive me, please…

Tendo felt her arms enveloping him in embrace and rubbing soothing circles on his back – Sakura was consoling him! She smiled at him and he could almost believe that smile, if it wasn’t for the tension in her jaw from biting back the pain. Sakura said in overly calm tone:

-          Shh, sensei, I’m alright… it just… stings. I will be alright…

-          What can I do?

-          Move.

He was ready to be still for the rest of his life even if it killed him – so Tendo wasn’t expecting her command to move! He checked:

-          But wouldn’t it..?

-          It would… but it stings either way… and before… I liked it when you moved.

He needed no more invitations and permissions than that – instinct took over and lead him into rhythm, as old as time itself, picking up the pace when he felt Sakura respond to his thrusts with her own. At that moment only her body attached him to life, only she held the power to turn all of his pent-up frustration into pure blinding energy that drove him further, deeper, faster! He marched to the drum of pulse beating in his temples and to the sound of her cries, chanting his name with every breath… everything was there in his name falling off her lips – the urgency, the love, the explanation, the miracle… ‘Kairi… Kairi… Kairi… Kai... Kai... nnnnnn... Kai... ahhh... Kai... ohhhh... Kai... reeeee...'. And then he felt her tighten around him, her mouth falling open in a silent scream. So tight, so, so tight! Pulsing, wet, gliding, velvet… He should’ve stopped, should’ve waited – but then she commander again in the sweetest of commands:

-          Kairi… come.

One dive… another one… he heard her teeth rattle… another one… her nails dug into his asscheeks urging him to thrust impossibly deeper… one more, hard…  her bed shaking dangerously under his rush… and another, and another… And lightning struck through his spine! ..and the world seized to exist, and only blazing hot stream of energy rushed through his body, collecting everything he was to give to her! To press it into her, again and again, so he could stay in her forever, and be lifeless and alive in the same time! And be hers!

-          I love you, Sakura Nanase! I adore you, I worship you, I live and breathe you! Thank you… Oh, Nanase, thank you so much!

Her response was of a warm hug and a kiss to his chest. Few moments later her grip loosened and Tendo heard her breathing softly, evenly – his newly-made woman fell asleep. He carefully stood up, brought a warm wet cloth from the bathroom and cleaned them both up. Sakura didn’t even stir when Kairi freed the covers and blanket from underneath her. He chuckled softly at his sleeping beauty and joined her in that tiny bed of hers where two people would have to snuggle really tight not to fall off at night. Tendo was fine with that – he wasn’t planning to let her go anyways. Ever.

***   ***   ***

Tendo turned the corner and stopped, leaning against the wall. He closed his eyes, fighting off tangles of headache creeping up his skull. Today wasn’t that difficult from the work perspective, per se, his patients were going well all things considered, two new came in and preparation for scheduled surgeries was on the way. But something… something was just off.

He knew that the reason was Nanase. The fact that he’d upset her this morning and she’d ran away before he could apologize… The fact that she’d sent in his lunch with a sweet and cheerful note, but didn’t want to come personally… Kairi was obsessed with seeing her again to the point that he hallucinated her walking on the other end of the corridor – but when he ran up to the spot, she’d disappeared in the thin air, like mirage.

He hasn’t seen her in five days. Nurse Sakai got sick and Nanase agreed to change her shifts for night ones to help out. So, the only time they saw each other was during morning and evening check-ins, in the hospital, with other staff present.

Kairi missed her so much! Missed holding her small frame through the night, missed the smell of her hair, the brightness of her smile… His wife’s silly songs she’d made off recipes and were singing during cooking… Color pencils scattered on the floor and handmade brochures she prepared for her patients with post-surgery care routines lying around the apartment… Kairi missed her curious button nose that would get into anything he was reading and then Nanase would ask him a million distracting questions... but he also missed her attentive and proud eyes when she was listening to his responses. He missed her one-of-a-kind mind, her forgiving soul, her optimistic heart… his wife, Tendo Nanase.

And he’d also missed her body. The slopes and ridges, the depth of it, the taste, the scent… Just thinking of it made his body tense and his pants become uncomfortably tight. It’s only been five days… and they’d been married for five months… but there was no saturation with her, no ‘enough’, no ‘slowing down’ or ‘marriage routine’. Every day with her was a new handwritten page of happiness, every night was a study of passion and abandon. Kairi was addicted to his wife, and blissfully so. If was as if she was a hormone that his body wasn’t producing and was lacking all his life even without knowing. And then Nanase broke in, forcefully, with stubborn conviction – and his life finally tilted towards the happiness. She reminded him how to laugh, helped him to find his own heart and challenged a man in him. The challenge was to love Nanase so much that her first man would always be her only man – and she wouldn’t miss out on anything! And Kairi missed the challenge for five days now! In a row!

The first night when he came home, on Monday, Kairi realized Nanase wasn’t sleeping in their bed but rather on the couch. He called her up to ask for a reason… and his wife told him the bed was too big for her without him… and couch cushions smelled like him… because this is where he read. Kairi bit his lip and moaned silently, feeling his groin getting heavier and hotter. Later, he slept in their bed because sheets smelled of her, of her tangled dark hair that covered his face like a canopy when she rode him the night before, of her screams and bites, her uninhibited desire for him…

But now… he was losing her scent in their apartment… the sheets were too cold.

And tonight was her last night shift. Tomorrow was a weekend for both of them. Nanase will come home and he will wake up to the sound of her cooking or singing or both. And he will hold her in his arms and inhale her and everything will be all right again. Kairi just needed to survive till then.

***   ***   ***

Kairi looked at his watch – 5 pm. Two hours till the end of his shift, one hour till Nanase comes in for evening check-in, fourteen hours till she comes back home after her shift. He could make it because he would get to see her in an hour… just one hour.

Or not... Reacting to the screams and gurgling sounds in the nearby room, Tendo rushed in to find Nanase struggling to contain a male patient trashing on the bed. Two nurses quickly ran in past him, one adjusted patient’s IV drip, other injected something into his shoulder – and things quieted really quickly. Nanase let go of patient’s arms and turned to the chief nurse, not noticing Tendo standing behind her:

-          I’m so sorry, I don’t know what happened! I was giving him his dinner and…

The fact that she was feeding the patient was very evident seeing how Nanase was covered in pieces of vegetables and stains of fruit tea that were served for dinner today. Chief nurse rushed to calm Nanase down, side-eyeing Tendo suspiciously because he still hasn’t announced his presence to his wife:

-          It’s ok, Nanase-chan, it’s not your fault, his anti-seizure meds weren’t adjusted yet, we’re waiting for Doctor Kisugi to come in later and do that. You should go and clean up before your shift starts. Why did you come so early anyways?

Nanase looked at the floor shyly and said:

-          It’s a… personal matter. I thought I’d help with dinner first and then go find Tendo-sensei and…

That’s when Kairi took his que and grabbed his wife by the forearm, tugging her towards him. Nanase looked up and shy delight crossed her face, leaving unmistakable blush behind. She bowed to him demurely:

-          Tendo-sensei, I’ll be at the evening check-in as soon as…

-          You have broccoli in your hair…

-          Yes, I’ll go take a shower and be back when…

-          I’ll take care of it. Come.

Tendo dragged his wife away from two nurses, smirking at him with knowing smiles. Nanase tried arguing, while almost running behind him to keep up with the pace:

-          Tendo-sensei, we have shower next to the nurses’ station, I can be back very quickly, I don’t want to impose on doctors’ premises.

-          That’s not where we’re going…

Nanase looked at him incredulously but Tendo paid no attention to her surprise while continuing to their destination, using the most inconspicuous of paths to avoid meeting more colleagues and more questions. As they walked, Nanase started to recognize the halls of this secluded and posh wing – and her suspicions were confirmed when Tendo opened and closed behind her a door to one of VIP suites. Nanase spooked and tried to rush out of the door:

-          Sensei, we can’t use VIP suites for showers! Mariko-san will not allow it! Nurses are sent to this wing only by assignment!

Tendo caught her by the shoulders and pressed her against the door. Nanase looked up, her mouth open to protest more – and all her protests drowned in the deep, hungry kiss her husband landed on her. Humming noise in the back of his throat vibrated through her body, making her weak in the knees – and if she weren’t being held up against the door by his strong hands, Nanase would probably have dropped. Something in her mind that was responsible for manners and propriety switched off, giving way to the wave of familiar anticipation. She moaned into his mouth, biting his lower lip a little and hearing him respond with sharp inhale. With visible difficulty, Tendo tore himself off his wife and rested his forehead on the door above her shoulder. He said, short of breath:

-          You aren’t here as a nurse… it’s still one hour till your shift… you’re here as my wife… and I have a privilege to come here whenever I wish to.

Nanase peeped from around his back and looked around the room. Tendo stepped away to give her a better overview, while trying to do some calming breathing exercises himself – while Nanase was technically not at work yet, he was and he needed to go back to his patients soon enough, before Koichi-kun comes in to change him.

Nanase walked around the room and noticed all the things that made this room different from lavish suites for VIP patients. First of all, it wasn’t all that lavish – furniture was much simpler than she’d remembered, fewer decorations, much smaller TV set and no vases with live flowers. The bed wasn’t one of the standard motorized hospital beds but rather simple-frame queen-size bed with few extra cushions. Overall, the room looked like a mix of a hotel room and an office, the office part represented by a big desk near a window which was obviously used by doctors since it was covered in piles of folders and X-ray files.

Nanase asked:

-          What is this room? Some… doctors’ lounge?

Tendo chuckled:

-          Not exactly, no. When this wing was refurbished for VIP suites, this room was deemed too small for the high standards of VIP patients, so hospital’s management decided to keep it for the doctors in charge. Today that’s me. We use it occasionally to work, research, take a shower or sleep, if time allows.

Nanase looked around and noticed the door that led to the bathroom. She suddenly remembered how silly she must look with patient’s dinner displayed all over her and started towards the door – and then stopped. Her eyes darted between bathroom and exit door and back. Tendo asked:

-          What? You don’t have to worry, nobody would walk in, it can only be open with our badges. There’s also a latch on the bathroom door, if you want to use it…

-          That’s not it… My spare uniform is in my locker, I need to go take it.

Tendo nodded but stopped Nanase when she tried to walk out:

-          You go take your shower, I’ll bring your things and get back to my patients. There is shower gel and shampoo on the stall, towels are in the cupboard by the door. I’ll be back soon!

And with that Kairi landed a quick chaste kiss on his wife’s forehead and left the room, covering the distance in wide strides to come back faster. Nanase sighted with a tinge of disappointment – she was hoping for more time with her husband when she came to work earlier, but, alas, her unfortunate incident derailed her plans. She made a quick work of undressing, folding her uniform neatly and going into bathroom. The shower stall was a standard edition for medical facilities, with sturdy railings on two levels and spray nuzzles from top to bottom for stimulating massage, if needed. And while Nanase wouldn’t mind a massage this time to relieve her of coiling tension inside, she didn’t want to overstep the hospitality of this secret lounge. Her shower would be quick and efficient!

Meanwhile, Tendo thought along the same lines – that his wife will be in and out in a split second – so he rushed to get her things before she had to come out of the shower… draped in a towel only… warm and wet… focus, Kairi!

Easier said than done! Images rushed through his mind, offering all the ways he could help her shower, to make sure that all her hidden spots were well taken care of and…

-          Tendo-kun! Just the man I was looking for!

Kairi turned around and stumbled upon seeing Koichi’s smiling face, while his fellow doctor approached to greet him. Tendo responded automatically, still trying to focus his gaze and shake off the effects of feverish daydreaming. He looked at his watch and said:

-          I need to take Nanase’s spare uniform and then I’d be back to brief you about…

-          Yeah, I know, Kaori-san valve repair prep and Nakoishi-san pacer implant surgery. Mariko-san already gave me all the charts, I’m fully up to speed! So, unless there’s something else you want to tell me… you’re off duty as of now!

And he winked at Kairi. He winked at him! Tendo frowned and stepped back, as if from a blow… Was he THAT obvious? Did the entire hospital know that he was a horny idiot obsessed with his wife? Was there a conspiracy to get him laid?!

He was supposed to be offended at that prospect, outraged even! But at that moment, all he could hear was ‘it’s still an hour till her shift starts… and she’s still in the shower… shower…’.

Tendo nodded, rushed to grab Nanase’s clothes and flat our ran back to the VIP wing at full speed. He thought he’d heard a choir of chuckles and quiet laughs from nurses’ station – but he couldn’t care less! His image be damned – he was, after all, horny idiot obsessed with his wife!

***   ***   ***

Nanase was absolutely planning to get out of the shower any minute now… but the hot water was so soothing and energizing in the same time, massaging her stiff shoulders with high-pressure streams. She’d heard her husband come into the room again and cried out to him:

-          Sensei, I’ll be out soon! Please, leave my uniform and get back to your patients! I’ll be fine here!

She stretched, checking how her muscles relaxed, and rinsed her hair once again. Nanase turned her head to face the water, her eyes closed and her lips smiling – she just loved hot showers very much. She’d found the faucet by touch and before she could turn it off, a strong hand stopped her, other circled her waist and pressed her to the obviously naked male body and a familiar voice whispered to her ear:

-          Don’t. I need a shower too.

Her rational mind reminded her about time, schedules, something-something… But her female body swayed into him, feeling him grinding back into her. Tendo let go of her hand and caught one of her nipples between his fingers, tuning it up to the sensitive aroused state. His whisper came between bites of her neck and shoulder:

-          You know, personal hygiene is a very serious matter in medical profession. I do need to make sure that you are clean here… - he followed the outline of her breast, then the other, - … here… - his hand trailed back down, his nails sliding across her wet skin, - and here too…  - Tendo’s fingers split the hair in the apex of her thighs and slipped in, circling, teasing.

Nanase grabbed the railing in front of her with one hand and Tando’s wet hair above her with another and held on for the sensual assault. Her lover knew what he was doing – his exceptional mind, when focused on her body, was inventive, generous and wicked! Nanase felt dizzy and inflamed and this time it had nothing to do with a fog of hot air around her and water running down her body. One last rational thought escaped almost involuntary:

-          Your shift…

He buckled into her, making Nanase lose balance and stumble forward, almost hitting the metal railing she was holding. Kairi held her back, using the hand that was buried knuckles deep into her body to anchor her back to him. Nanase cried out and he repeated the motion again, and again. When he hissed his answer into her hair, Nanase was too far gone past remembering her question at all:

-          Another doctor already took over. We have time…

Something flashed inside Nanase, an understanding, a memory… There was something she liked doing when they had time. A reckoning…

Nanase took all of her will power – and physical strength – to push herself off the glass wall in front of her. She unclutched Tendo’s hands holding her in place, whining momentarily on the loss of the fullness and heat his fingers provided. Nanase turned around and faced him, her gorgeous demi-god husband, built of steel and velvet… and desire. She pushed back, and back – until Tendo stopped at the opposite glass wall, awkwardly placing his elbows on the upper railing. He looked at her surprised, but aroused and willing to go wherever this was leading to. Nanase smiled – her special smile that meant so many things now – and told him, touching her fingers to his upper arms:

-          Hold on. Don’t let go.

He nodded automatically thinking of what she may be planning – and then there was no thinking possible! Nanase’s lips landed everywhere on his skin, licking off droplets of water, biting across sensitive spots, soothing bite marks with wide strokes of her tongue… Her hands caressed his body, explored with soft touches, marked with red lines, loved him, worshiped… When Nanase went down on her knees, Tendo groaned and threw his head up, feeling heat wash over him from inside… and when she took him into her mouth and sucked in the whole length of his shaft… Tendo saw stars! Her wet lips, the perfect pressure, just the right rhythm… his body was no longer his, coiling numbness was taking over, turning off circuits in his body and his brain… He missed her so much!

With the last tendrils of sanity escaping him, Tendo begged:

-          Nanase, please…

She released him with a plop and asked, kissing his thigh and continuing her rhythm with the palm of her hand:

-          Yes, anata?

Kairi bent over and grabbed her by the waist, turning around and hoisting her up on the lower level railing. She circled her legs around him and locked them behind his back, catching Kairi and tugging him close to her body. He kissed her, hungrily, urgently… then begged again:

-          Say it…

-          What, anata? What should I say, Kairi?

And there it was – those special words that drove him crazy! Because he knew how many barriers had to melt in Nanase’s mind for her to call him by the name, to address him as ‘husband’… and he did this to her! She was his – ripe, willing, ready to be taken, ready to take him too!

Invitation was so close… Unmistakable scent that was not washed away by shower but only amplified by the steamed glass compartment… slick wetness where their bodies longed to be connected… her lips and her whimpers on the base of his neck… and her searching hands, digging nails into his asscheeks to bring him home.

-          Kairi, please…

He plunged deep, reaching the core of her female self in one go! Plunging in and out with a force that could easily shutter the tempered glass behind her back – for every night he’d spent without her, for every time his fingers flexed to find her body in the darkness and didn’t, for every time he couldn’t remember her scent… There were many, many times like this and so he worked them all out into her, into her accepting body, her unreserved screams, her ‘more’ and ‘harder’!

It was too much too fast for him! He waited for so long! Numbness took over again, flowing from where their bodies connected to the outsides of his body and beyond. Kairi cried out her name and heard her whisper ‘five’. Four… three… two… one!!! His wife convulsed around him, froze for a moment and then fell apart with a low, almost pained scream! Her body sucked him in… three… two… one!!! And he followed! Ignited nerves exploding, heart jumping out of his chest and everything around him turning into blissful darkness, filled with her satisfied humming and the sound of running water…

***   ***   ***

When his vision cleared, Kairi found himself sitting on the shower floor, his wife still circling his hips, smiling at him mischievously. Nanase kissed his nose and said:

-          Anata… long time no see!

Kairi groaned – his wife would be the death of him! But, on a plus side, he’d die a very happy man! His usual cold-blooded demeanor creeped back into steamy bathroom and he said:

-          Only you would joke like that in this situation! Baka!

Nanase waved him off and stood up carefully, holding the railing not to slip up on the wet floor. She picked up the shower gel and washcloth and handed them to Kairi:

-          Since you here, you can help me wash my back, I couldn’t reach it before…

Her voice was so seductively nonchalant, Tendo chuckled. He loved these short periods right after lovemaking when his wife was still riding the hormone rush and her inhibitions and self-imposed limits didn’t apply. With time, these periods became longer, and his wife was getting bolder with him, going as far as calling him by the name even outside their bedroom! That only happened few times but Kairi was willing to put in whatever effort it took – especially considering he enjoyed the effort itself beyond comprehension! His favorite treatment plan ever!

Kairi helped Nanase wash up and she did the same for him, taking time to be tender and soft with each other, sharing smiles and small kisses. When they came out, Nanase changed into her spare uniform and went to the fridge to fish out some water. She brought him a bottle too and made sure he drank up all of it. While dressing up, Tendo noticed that something changed in his wife’s demeanor – something awkward, uncertain… reserved?

His morning behaviour came to mind and Tendo opened his mouth to apologise – when Nanase dragged him by the sleeve to sit on the couch.

-          Kairi, we need to talk.

He dreaded this talk, but it was necessary. He just hoped that her responsiveness before meant she would forgive him soon.

-          Nanase, about today, I was wrong, I shouldn’t have…

Tendo tried to speak fast, to get as much of his apologies out before his wife’s too-forgiving heart will absolve him of all sins, as she usually did. But that wasn’t what she’d interrupted him with.

-          It’s not about today. I mean, it is, in a way, but it’s not your fault, it’s mine. Well… yours too, but mostly mine.

She nodded and stayed with lowered head, observing her hands clutched together. Tendo sat closer, taking her hands into his and kissing them, knuckle by knuckle.

-          Nanase, I should not have scolded you. I upset you and made you run away from me.

His wife raised her head and looked him in the eyes, her expression perplexed. She looked up, as if remembering something, then back at him with a smile:

-          Ananta, it’s not why I ran away. I just didn’t want you to see me get sick, I didn’t feel well this morning.

-          Sick? Nanase, what’s wrong? How are you feeling? Have you been to the doctor? Should we go now?

-          Shh, I’m fine. Yes, I’ve been to the doctor, today, when I brought you lunch.

So, he did see her in the corridor today, it’s wasn’t a hallucination! But… but…

-          Why didn’t you come see me right after? What did the doctor say?

Nanase smiled again and kissed his fingers wrapped around her hands.

-          I wanted to come, but first there was an appointment with Akai-san, then blood tests, then ultrasound… When I was done, I came here but you were already in the OR so I left to prepare for my shift.

Tendo huffed with irritation:

-          Nanase, the timeline was clearly not the most important part of my question! What did Akai-san say? Is your hormonal treatment not working? What were the blood tests about? What should I know? Say it already!

Nanase chewed on her lower lip and looked away – her tell for immense insecurity – and then took something out of her pocket and handed it over to Kairi.

Kairi unfolded few sheets of paper with hospital header on them – blood test, diagnosis, ultrasound results… On top of it all, attached by the staple, there was a small rectangular picture with classic ultrasound triangle. With shades, and echos… and one unmistakable white dot. Numbers ran in front of his eyes… sizes, estimated gestation period, heartbeat rate… His little white dot has already had a heartbeat!

Papers spilled out to the floor and Tendo didn’t even notice. He looked at his wife with unblinking eyes and whispered hoarsely:

-          Are you… pregnant?

Nanase nodded, her pale face looking so lost and guilty now! She rushed into explanation:

-          I didn’t think it was it, I thought that was just aftereffect from switching to new treatment! Sensei, I know, you didn’t plan for this, I didn’t want to put you in this position…

-          Treatment…

-          Yes, Akai-san said it’s practically impossible that such treatment could result in pregnancy but then…

-          No, Nanase, listen! – Kairi shook her by the shoulders, his voice frantic, - did you cancel the treatment? You were taking it this whole time! Can it harm our baby?!

-          Our… baby?

Nanase looked at him, his worried eyes, his trembling lips – and realization dawned on her! Her smile rose above them like a rainbow, happy, unreserved, eternal! She touched her fingers to his furrowed brow and asked:

-          So… you want it?

Tendo brows furrowed further but this time with different question in mind!

-          Do I want it? Nanase, you loveable idiot! Of course, I want our baby! How could you possibly think anything else?!

-          Well, we haven’t discussed it… and it wasn’t in your plan…

-          What plan, Nanase? There was no plan before you! You are the plan! And whatever comes from you, around you and for you – it is my plan!

He hugged her to his chest tightly and Nanase heard his heart thundering in his chest in unison with quickened breathing. His lips whispered something into her hair, but she couldn’t make out the words. Then Kairi tore her away from him again and ask anxiously:

-          The treatment? Will it harm the baby?

Nanase smiled and bent over to pick up the scattered papers. She found the right one and showed it to her husband:

-          According to this, our baby is a fighter! If treatment did not deter the consumption, then the treatment would have no effect on early gestation, especially, since I stopped it already. The baby is fine, Kairi, all the results are normal for our 6-weeks old sweet pea!

Sweet pea! Their baby had a size and a heartbeat, and it was fine and healthy and growing inside the woman he loved! Kairi hugged her again, sitting her comfortably on his lap, because he wasn’t planning to let her go for a long time, her shift and schedule all but forgotten! He wanted to talk to her… ask her about morning sickness that she was apparently hiding from him… if she had any cravings yet because Kairi wanted her to have them so he could satisfy the littlest of her needs… if she wanted a boy or a girl – but he already knew Nanase would say ‘as long as it’s healthy and happy’… they needed to discuss buying a house because they weren’t raising a family in his old bachelor apartment!.. he wanted to talk baby names…

Kairi wanted to keep them safe and comfortable in the protective shield of his body, to let Nanase know how much he loved and cherished her and their baby – his two 0,0001% impossible miracles! As they set there, him whispering soft words of love into her smiling lips, Tendo saw in her bright eyes how his life was expanding, to encompass him and his wife and all the possibilities and surprises, and all the promises he was about to make, and all the changes he was so looking forward to right now! And all thanks to her, his shining wife, little brave hero who fought her way through his darkness and thorns – to give him acceptance, hope, happiness, and, eventually, life!

And to him there was no doubt that love like this will last forever…

#koi wa tsuzuku yo dokomademo #an incurable case of love #love lasts forever #ksana writes stuff #you can see how in love i am #i haven't written in ages

[t0sshii]

ginhiji hospital au??

I needed to get this off of my brain and I can’t draw or write so here it goes... Ginhiji but Hijikata is a nurse working in a hospital and Gintoki is the new resident who comes off as lazy but is actually a really good doctor (which surprises our boy Toushi)

More thoughts under the cut? (I have more thoughts about hijikata because.... i have more experience there LOL)

I’ve been a working nurse for more than half a year now so I kind of know what I’m talking about? (but not really because i’m definitely still a baby nurse that’s still learning OTL) but really im a baby don’t ask me specifics

I got into Gintama super late and I have so many regrets because it’s taken over my life. 

hijikata working in either medsurg, ICU, or emergency because it’s not slow, needs great time management skills and working under pressure /but i have a bias for medsurg because that’s where i am right now... but i feel like he would definitely be the same kind of intense that some ICU nurses i know are... 

he’s definitely the type to not take a proper break at work... would probably eat saltines from the nutrition room 

reason 1: he’s too busy

reason 2: hates to go on break if he has to leave hella shit for the person covering him (so he give all his meds, clean his patients, give pain meds...make sure they NEVER call the person covering him on break) but that also means when things don’t calm down he feels like there’s never an opening for one

meanwhile he will give meds, clean patients, and do everything for whoever he covers for break 

when this happens kondo sends yamazaki to cover him for breaks because you can’t tell patients to eat their food when you haven’t eaten toushi 

is really good at putting in IVs, nobody on the unit even tries to put them in when he’s working they’ll just ask him to do it for them

a charting superuser lol

his brain... impeccable. a work of art. a pinnacle of organization. made his own because the hospital issued one doesn’t work for him

probably looks something like this

note: allows you do just quickly circle things during shift change instead of writing it all down...i would probably make past medical history section bigger though (do i use a sheet like this? no because i am... organized chaos and writing it down helps ME--but toushi probably wants to take as little time possible writing shit down) 

reads his work e-mail, even the newsletters from the hospital

kondo is nurse manager and is a very supportive one (the potlucks!!! tries his best to make sure everyone feels supported at work ; w ;) hired hijikata..

when hijikata is charge, the work is distributed evenly thank god 

also “it’s an hour until shift change and if this patient doesn’t come up in 10 minutes they’re not coming until after shift change” 

everyone asks him for help because he knows all the hospital policies

what nurse isn’t frustrated with doctors lets be real 

exhibit A: “my patient is in TEARS with 10/10 pain and the doctors have the audacity to ask if THEY TRIED TO DISTRACT THEMSELVES WITH ART?” (this is a literal conversation I’ve had with a resident before) 

hates talking to interns because he ends up having to teach them how to do their job 

hates talking to jaded attendings

only attending he likes is shouyo

used to have long hair in nursing school but cut it after his ponytail got into some shit during a bed bath 

still smokes.. kondo hates it because we’ve all seen what it’s done to our patients and you still smoke?

has tried to quit but never works out

gintoki also gets on his case about it

just imagine hijikata in those black figs joggers scrubs UGH 

in this universe they’re called digs because copyright and this is still gintama we’re talking about

these scrubs are unnecessarily expensive so he didn’t actually buy them himself ( “why the fuck would i buy expensive scrubs if i am going to get literal shit on it”).. if left to his own devices he will wear those ugly ass hospital issued scrubs

Kondo and his other friends split the price for the black joggers and a 3 pocket scrub top -- because we all know hijikata puts ALL his supplies in his pockets. he NEEDS pockets

Gintoki thinks his ass looks good in those joggers UGH 

Hijikata won’t admit it but the digs are his favorite pair they are so comfortable. still won’t buy them with his own money though

student nurses are scared of him because he’s intense and asks hard questions, really strict... doesn’t bully but pushes students and orientees really hard

but also any one who can survive being trained by him becomes an excellent nurse

that nurse that’s on top of their shit and THINKS instead of just following orders

“saw his potassium is high. can we do something about that?”

“there wasn’t continuous oxygen monitoring ordered but i put them on because it doesn’t look good. can we get an order for that” 

all the doctors trust him because he’s just so goOD

gets on gintoki’s case about looking like a bum at the hospital all the time

if he EVER catches wind of doctors talking down to his nurses or older nurses bullying the newer ones (which never really happens because kondo is a great manager who fosters a very nontoxic work culture) they will...FEEL. HIS. WRATH. 

also will not tolerate patients treating him (or his coworkers) like shit. will be more professional dealing with patients tho than with the MDs. but if it’s an MD berating a nurse, they better be ready to get their ass KICKED

Gintoki is the new resident along with katsura and takasugi in.... internal medicine? surgery? idk? 

i mostly just wanted write this one: hijikata has a patient in a pain crisis 10/10 pain, given all available pain meds, tried everything possible but still no relief. paged the new resident working with this patient 

hijikata fully expects either a call saying “sorry i can’t order any more pain medicine for this patient” or just another IV medicine ordered with no communication at all 

but gintoki comes into the patient’s room (first thing hijikata notices is unprofessional hair, wrinkled jacket, mismatching socks and thinks this doctor is going to be lazy AF), speaks to the patient with great bedside manner, talks to the patient about pain management strategies and WORKS WITH THEM for a better plan for medication. walks with the patient in the hall and even takes them to the bathroom 

hijikata is FLOORED. because this never happens with MDs.

(this has actually happened and me and all my coworkers were SO PLEASANTLY SURPRISED)

hijikata once sent gintoki a message asking if he wanted to lower the dose for a medication because the lab for it was high 

gintoki thought he was the pharmacist because hijikata is just that good

likes the sound of hijikata’s voice on the phone so he always returns his pages even if it’s just to say “ok i’ll put the order in” 

secretly gets excited when he sees hijikata’s name on the chart under the care team 

one because he’s hot

two because he’s a good nurse

actually learns a lot from hijikata

gets to know hijikata’s bad break habits and gives him a coffee whenever he notices he’s working (but is absolutely disgusted when he brings out the mayonnaise)

“how can you tell your patients to be healthy when you put that shit in everything you eat?” 

hijikata counters with “you can’t tell me what to eat when you’re on your way to diabetes asshole” 

tries to be the kind of MD shouyo is 

being in healthcare is hard so the two of them do drink together if their days off line up to vent....

hijikata complains about dumb MDs (gintoki makes mental notes on how to not be an annoying MD), how busy his days are, and why are we always understaffed... how can we run out of IVs? 

gintoki complains about all the calls he gets, how stressful residency is, why are rounds so early, that midget takasugi, the long ass working hours, being on call fuckin sucks

both bond over sharing crazy stories about patients or how their day went....also hospital complaints because what healthcare worker doesn’t complain about their hospital 

get into “who’s job is more stressful” arguments a lot

on particularly hard (emotionally, physically, mentally) days the other would show up with a bag of food and drinks? 

when the two start dating, it’s usually just... hanging out at work? 

if somehow by some miracle, they get their breaks together (if at all) they eat together

if they do have days off together they usually spend it sleeping (literally you guys) or relaxing at one of their apartments

sleep deprived healthcare workers lead to many....petty...arguments but they make up by the end 

it’s late and i have more thoughts? but i have work tomorrow. but i needed to get this OUT OF MY BRAIN.

also feel free to message me about any of this!! :) asks are always open hehe

#smh anjo #i never see anything about nurses in fandom and i get sad #gintama #ginhiji #headcanons #hospital au #i wish i had talent AHAAHAHA #mostly because i want to see hiji in THOSE BLACK FIGS JOGGERS #anime #Hijikata Toushirou #sakata gintoki #hijigin #ginhijigin

[wonderfullyinaccurate]

Someone Like Me || Part 1/2

Warnings:

- Abusive Relationship(past mentioned and present actively described)

- Physical Abuse(past mentioned and present actively described)

You have been warned.

- Minjun is an OC made up completely by me.

This does not portray what I think of anyone involved and is simply made up of my imagination. Thank you. 

- Happy Ending(both parts)

Short Description: Jeongguk is in an abusive relationship and Taehyung comes to his rescue after a bad night.

Jeongguk’s POV

I flinch as a glass is thrown across the kitchen, just barely missing me, and shattering against the wall. Tears were already streaming down my face and I was shaking uncontrollably. I thought that I would have grown used to this now, but each time he became more and more terrifying. He became much more violent as the months progressed, I don’t know where it all went wrong. Everything was perfect. Where did I go wrong?

Ugly sobs were pouring out of me and all he did was continue to yell and berate me. He reached for more and more solid objects to launch in my direction. I try to dodge and avoid them but one of our particularly denser glass hit me in the head, shattering on my skull. I let out a choked scream as it struck me and almost instantly fell to the ground . He took this as an opportunity to dash over and grab me by my neck and yank me upwards. I gasp from the the sudden move and lack of inflowing air.

“You fucking bitch!”, Minjun yells while tightening his grip on my neck, “I asked you to do one simple fucking thing and you can’t even do that?! You’re home all fucking day doing absolutely nothing, you useless piece of shit!”

“Mi-Minjun. I-I’m s-sorry. I-I wa-was s-sick th-this mo-morning”, I say while gasping for air.

“Fucking useless!”, he says while throwing me back down to the ground.

I inhale sharply, trying to regain my breath. I reach a hand up to my neck, touching it lightly, it was sure to bruise from his force. I had barely gotten my breathing under control when I received a sharp kick right to my ribs, instantly knocking the air out of me again. He kicked me again in the stomach and once in the chest, though he was aiming for my face. I let out scream with every kick, hoping it would just end.

I curl up in to a small ball on the floor once the kicking ceased. Silent cries wracking through me. I hear him scoff and leave the room, mumbling something incoherent under his breath. Minutes later the front door to our shared apartment swings open and slams shut, signifying that he left, most likely to go drink. I stayed in my position, unable to move elsewhere at this point. I could feel a warm liquid trickling down my face, it had to be blood from the glass that hit me prior.

I was struggling to breathe still, he must have cracked a rib or something, I couldn’t tell though everything hurt. He had only been gone for a few minutes when I suddenly hear someone knocking loudly on the door. There is nothing I can think of at the moment to get their attention as I surely couldn’t yell either. The knocking continues. I could hear their voice now.

“Hello! I heard yelling! What’s going on? Is everything okay?”, a deep voice booms from outside, it almost sounds like the door was partially open.

Maybe Minjun slamming the door didn’t allow it to shut all the way.

I try making some noise, but anything that came out of my mouth was raspy and quiet. I slowly move my arm out and reach for a piece of broken glass before throwing it as best I as could to hit the other pieces. It seems to have worked, as the stranger from outside announces that they are coming in. I can hear the floor creak lightly as they slowly made their way further into the apartment. They made it to the kitchen area and instantly let out a loud gasp. The stranger rushes over too me and drops down to the floor, narrowly avoiding the glass.

“Oh my god! I-I...fuck!”, the man says panicked while he looks me over.

He quickly reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone, dialing for the police. The phone call was quick and barely audible to me. The man brings his attention back to me and stands up. He starts moving any glass away from the area surrounding me.

I felt a sharp pain in my chest before I begin to cough, blood finding its way out of my mouth. The man instantly panics more. He runs back over to me and slowly gets me to come out of my fetal-like position and saw a shard of glass stuck into my side. I must have landed on it when Minjun threw me back down.

“Shit, shit, shit. Okay, alright. The police and ambulance will be here soon alright, just stay focused on me. Just try to answer my questions, okay?”, the man asks me, trying his best to keep me awake.

I glance over to him and try to give a nod.

“Alright, alright, so what’s your name?”, he asked.

“J-Jeongguk. Je-Jeon Jeong-gguk”, I answer with a very raspy voice.

“Alright, good, good. Stay with me Jeongguk. I’m Taehyung. Do you know who did this?”, he asks another question while finding my hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.

I pause for a moment.

“M-my bo-boyfriend, Mi-Minjun”, I answer shakily.

The faint sound of sirens can be heard in the distance as I am struggling more and more to breathe. Taehyung seems to take notice and tries his best to get me to take slower, deeper breaths. The sirens were outside now and I could hear the people rushing in. Everything began to get really dark. I can hardly understand what is going on. I could faintly hear the EMTs voices and the last thing I saw before everything went dark was Taehyung.

———————2 Weeks Later———————

I open my eyes to see nothing but bright lights, immediately squinting to adjust. A faint beeping sound slowly making its way through my ears and getting louder as I began to fully take in my surroundings.

I look around to see machines with different numbers and information on them, along with a heart rate monitor and I could feel the tubes and wires leading to my arms. I could finally recognize that I am in the hospital in what appears to be an ICU room. I am the only one in the room, at least until one of the nurses came in. She looks slightly surprised to see me awake.

“Mr. Jeon, nice to have you join us today. Do you know why you’re here?”, she asks me, getting straight to work.

“I...uh”, my voice comes out extremely hoarse and dry.

“Ah, hold that thought. I’ll get you some water and the doctor, okay?”, she said sweetly.

I nod.

She swiftly exits. I shift slightly in the bed and a quick spurt of pain shoots through my side causing me to hiss.

“Careful there. Don’t want to make it worse”, a deep voice cuts through the room.

I look over to see a slightly familiar face.

“I brought some water with me if you want it. It’s in a bottle.”, Taehyung says while holding the water up, “I’m assuming the nurse has already seen you?”

I nod as he walks closer. He uncaps the bottle and passes it to me. I reach up and take it from him slowly and begin to drink as he continues talking.

“I’m sure the nurse told you that she was gonna bring water?”, he questions.

“Y-yeah”, I say while moving the water bottle away.

“Have you seen the doctor yet? I’ve been gone for like two hours or so”, he asks.

“N-no. I j-just woke up”, I answer.

“Oh. I see. Well, I guess we’ll wait for them then”, he says while moving over to the chair near the bed, “Question. What’s today?”

“Huh?”, I look over at him.

“Mm, you know. Monday? Tuesday? What’s today?”, he asks again.

“Umm.”, I pause to think.

If it was Thursday when Minjun did this, I can’t imagine that it’s been more than a day or two. I thought I would feel more pain, but it must be the morphine or something.

“It’s either Friday or Saturday, right?”, I finally answer.

“Mm, not quite. It’s Thursday”, he says while watching my expression change.

Thursday? But...what?

“Thursday? It’s been a week?”, I ask clearly confused.

“Two actually. But it’s nothing to be alarmed of”, he says still watching me.

“T-two weeks?”, I repeat somewhat emotional.

“Hey, it’s—“, Taehyung starts.

A knock sounds through the room and the nurse returns with water and the doctor.

“Ah, Mr. Kim, nice to see you again. I see you brought him water already. I’ll just set this down over here for later.”, she says while setting the styrofoam cup down on a rolling table near the bed, “Dr. Sonu is here to check you over and answer any questions, okay? I’ll be back later, sweetheart.”

The nurse leaves the room and the doctor comes closer to me and checks the information on the monitors while writing some stuff down.

“Alright, hi Jeongguk, I’m Dr. Sonu Chihun. I’ve been looking after you while you’ve been here and helped preform the surgery you had. How are you feeling?”, Dr. Sonu asks me.

“I-I...what? I had surgery? I don’t know what’s going on”, I say, starting to tear up.

Taehyung stands up and quickly walks over to the side opposite of the doctor and takes my hand. He gently rubs his thumb on the back of my hand.

“Hey, it’s okay. I know all this information is coming at you really quickly right now, but I just need you to breath and relax, okay? We’re gonna fill you in, I promise”, Taehyung says, giving my hand a light little squeeze.

I nod slowly, taking in a few deep breaths before looking back towards Dr. Sonu.

“Right yes, I’m sorry. That was partially my fault. Let’s talk. I’m sure you know the reason you were brought in, yes”, Dr. Sonu asks while I nod, “Right, well, we had to take you into surgery upon arrival for the glass shard that had entered into your side, as it had punctured your lung.”

My mouth formed and “o” shaped as the doctor was explaining.

“Are you feeling much pain from that side right now just laying there?”, he asks.

“Uh, not really. Maybe a slight pinch, but that may be because I shifted a bit earlier”, I answer him.

“Mm, well, that’s about normal for where you are now. What about any other discomforts? Like your head?”, he says while taking more notes.

“Uh, not really?”, I say.

“That’s good. I don’t think you’ll have to stay here much longer Mr. Jeon. Maybe two or three more days max, just to clear some things. Once you are able to leave though, you’ll have to make sure you keep your movement and lifting limited for the time being. I’ll remind you of all this once we start filling out the discharge papers, alright?”, Dr. Sonu says while giving me a smile.

“Al-alright”, I nod.

“Nice seeing you boys. And, I’ll be back to check on you again later Jeongguk”, the doctor says while leaving the room.

I let out a shuttering sigh as I dove into my thoughts, completely missing the fact that Taehyung had never let go of my hand. He continues to rub small circles into the back of my hand before speaking up.

“What are you thinking about?”, he asks.

I shake my head coming back into reality.

“I...I have no where to go once I’m out of here. I can’t go back there to that apartment, Minjun had me delete all my friends from my phone and change my number months ago, I have no clue where my family is, and what if he comes back for me. I ju-just”, I begin to cry.

“Shh, it’s okay. I promise Minjun won’t ever see you again, the police found him two days after what he did to you. You two won’t see each other for a long time, you don’t have to worry about him anymore. As for your friends and family, I’m sure we can find them together while you stay with me”, he says reassuringly.

“What? Really? No...no that’s not right. You’ve already wasted two weeks here with me, I can’t—“, I start.

“No, it’s not a waste coming here to check on you. Let me tell you a quick story, okay?”, he asks while I nod, “A few years ago, I was in a situation just like yours. I was in a toxic and abusive relationship with no escape. He made me do all the same things Minjun did to you, I lost everything I had because of him. Well, one night we were out having dinner, a night I thought was going to be different for a change. At one point I had excused myself and when I returned my leg hit the table causing his drink to spill down on to him, completely on accident. He blew up right then and there, the restaurant full of people. I kept on apologizing and then, as a waiter was passing by, he grabbed the bottle they were carrying and smashed it over my head. I fell to the ground instantly and people screamed. He went to kick me and was able to get one good one in before other patrons of the restaurant, whether they were workers or customers, came in to restrain him and check me. I was barely coherent at this point. The next thing I remember was waking up here, in the hospital. There was one other person in the room and she was looking down at her phone. She saw me out of the corner of her eye and looked up and smiled at me. She did for me, what I’m doing for you, because she told me her story, but no one was there for her. It sucked. She made me promise to do the same, if I had ever found myself in the same situation. So, here I am. I am a man of my word”, he tells me with a few tears prickling at his eyes.

I look at him with pure sympathy in my eyes.

“Wow. I’m so sorry, Taehyung”, I say.

“No need. It’s in the past now. For now, we’ll focus on you”, he says while booping my nose.

“...okay”, I finally agree.

————————1 Week Later———————-

I was discharged from the hospital two days after I had woken up and I’ve been living in Taehyung’s spare room since. He went and collected my clothes from my old apartment beforehand. I couldn’t bear the thought of going back there at the moment. Just the thought alone of returning there made me tear up.

Currently I am laying in bed, as the doctor— and Taehyung—have me on strict bed rest. I was told that I could move around for maybe 15 to 30 minutes at a time, but to take long periods of rest in between. For my safety, the doctor also said not to move around without Taehyung being present, just in case I wasn’t able to handle it. I only really moved back and forth from the bedroom to the living room or dining table. I wasn’t allowed to sit up right for long periods of time either, Dr. Sonu said 30 minutes was my limit for most things.

I heard a knock on my door before Taehyung opens it completely and steps into the room. He walks over to the bed and sits on the edge.

“How are you feeling today? Have I brought your medicine in yet?”, he asks.

“Better, I think. And you have, earlier this morning. Did you forget?”, I ask with a light chuckle, anything more would’ve hurt still.

“Ah, right.”, he laughs, “That’s good that you’re feeling better as well because I have some news!”

“News? Is it the good kind?”, I ask while looking directly at him.

“Of course! When would I ever deliver bad news?”, he acts shocked, “Anyways, I believe I have found some friends of yours!”

“Wait!? Really?!”, I ask shocked.

“Mhm! Do the names Park Jimin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Kim Namjoon, and Kim Seokjin sound familiar to you?”, he asks, showing some excitement.

“Oh my god! How?”, I ask as tears start pouring out, “I never thought that I would see them again.”

Taehyung moves closer to my face and wipes away the tears.

“I’m assuming these are happy tears?”, he chuckles.

I nod while smiling like an idiot.

“I haven’t seen them in soo long. I miss them all so much. How did you find them?”, I ask, a few tears still escaping.

“The internet is a wonderful place when you’re looking for people. I’m part of a page that helps reunite lost family and friends. I put a notice out the day you had told me about them and I’ve just heard back today. I’ve messaged back and forth with a few of them and the all want to come see you!”, he answers enthusiastically, “I told them that when you’re more mobile would be the best time, so you guys can properly hang out. So, you better get to healing up faster!”

“Doctor says three more weeks, so I better be. I can’t stand not being able to move freely right now”, I joke.

“I’m sure, you seem like your more of a free spirited kinda guy”, he says.

“My friends used to call me that a lot when I was younger, so I guess I am. I was just...held back”, I say the last part quietly.

Taehyung rubs my shoulder.

“Well, no more of that. If the doctor clears you for it, we’re going to one of the funnest places I can think of when your friends get here”, he announces.

“Sounds amazing!”, I say while smiling.

“Great, now let’s watch a movie! You pick one out and I’ll go get snacks!”, he says giddily.

“Alright, sounds like a plan to me!”

(1/2)

#bts #bts ships #bts fanfction #bts fanfic #taekook #taegguk #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #jeon jeongguk #angst #some fluff #bts angst #jungkook angst #jungkook and taehyung #someone like me #part 1 #1/2 #happy ending

[softest-cinnamon-roll]

16. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet?” for reddie??

you are my home 

summary: Eddie’s thought’s during his induced coma in the hospital. [fix it fic]words: 3,195pairing: reddie*click link to read on AO3

* * * * * 

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

“Clear!”

Eddie felt his whole body jolt, even if he wasn’t conscious. The whole experience was surreal, sending his mind into the cusp of madness. Was he dead? Was he alive? Was this was Heaven was meant to be like, or had he committed too many sins and was actually in Hell?

Voices surrounded him, all of them unfamiliar and Eddie strained his fragile brain to find one that he could recognise. If he could only hear one voice, just one, he might be able to settle down and have a fighting chance. Through his haze of thoughts and panic in his mind, Eddie was still in a lot of pain. His chest felt like there were a tonne of bricks sitting upon it and there was a tightness in his throat, stopping him from gasping for breath.

It was strange, the whole feeling of being in limbo, at least that’s where Eddie assumed he was as he couldn’t talk, couldn’t tell the voices that he could feel each and every jolt of electricity and slam of their hands against his chest as the brought him back time and time again.

Slowly, Eddie could feel himself fade away once more, unable to keep his mind awake any longer. This was it, this was what dying felt like. He was about to pass away in a cold room surrounded by people he didn’t know, and who really didn’t care if he lived or died.

“We’re losing him! Clear!”

* * * * *

“He’s going to be alright, right? Tell me that he’s going to be alright!” The voice ringing in Eddie’s ear this time was a familiar one. Richie. Why was Richie in Heaven? He tried to open his eyes, but they were glued shut and he moved to his mouth, to try and say something. He couldn’t, however, as there was something stuck down his throat. A tube, probably to help him breathe.

“It’s too early to say, Mr Tozier. Right now, you just have to talk to him and let him know you’re here. They say he can hear you even when in an induced coma.” Another voice. A nurse.

Coma?

* * * * *

“A week without you, Eds.” There was a hand in his, a thumb stroking over his fingers, squeezing it every so often. “I miss you, and god, I just want you to wake up, to tell me I’m ridiculous and to stop calling you Eds. Even though I know that you love it, I know you do.” Another squeeze. “The doctor says that you can probably hear me, but you won’t remember when you wake up. So I’ve been here every day, talking to you, hoping you’ll wake up and show me those beautiful eyes of yours.” This time there was the feeling of a pair of lips against his palm. “If you can hear me, squeeze my hand, or move your fingers. Just- please Eds, give me a sign that you’re in there, recovering.”

Eddie tried. He really tried. There had never been a moment he had wanted to move his hand, or open his eyes more than in that moment. Instead, he was met with more blackness.

* * * * *

“Hey Eddie. I finally managed to get Richie to go for a shower. He hasn’t left your side since you got out of the ICU, even before then. The nurses were beginning to get worried. Don’t you worry though, Bill is making sure he’s okay. We all are.” It was Bev, sweet sweet Bev. She sounded exhausted. “We just hope you wake up soon, Eds. You’re so brave, just like Richie said. You’re going to pull through, I know you are.”

* * * * *

“I am sorry, but she is his next of kin and we had to contact her. She has a legal right to know about her husband.”

“She doesn’t care about him! Not like we do!”

“Richie, stop, please don’t yell. Yelling might distress Eddie.”

“I’m sorry Bev, I- but Myra is on her way and we- she won’t let us stay, you know she won’t.”

* * * * *

“Hey Eds, I don’t have long. Myra is outside talking with the doctor and she has already sent the other losers away. The nice nurse, the one who has been helping you let me in for five minutes while you’re beloved is distracted. I had to say goodbye. She- she’s banned us from visiting you, blaming us- blaming me for putting you in here. God, I’m already blaming myself, I don’t need her to do it for me. I just- I wanted to say one more thing, before I leave. I love you Eddie, I’ve always loved you. Hell, I was a repressed thirteen year old who was in love with my hypochondriac best friend. So much that I carved our names on the kissing bridge. Yeah, you heard that right Eddie Spaghetti-”

“Richie, she’s coming, you need to leave-”

“Please don’t forget about me Eds.”

I’ll never forget about you, Richie.

I love you, too.

Don’t leave me.

* * * * *

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

“Eddie-bear? Eddie bear can you hear me? Open your eyes for me Eddie-bear, I’m here. I’m right here.”

With a groan, his head spinning, Eddie finally managed to open his eyes. It was slow, as they felt as though they had been stuck together with glue and he was surprised to find the room dark, lit up only by a single lamp in the corner. The second sense to come back to him was his smell, his nose being filled with the scent of antiseptic gel and the general smell of hospitals. Slowly, he turned his head to the side and almost wished he would fall back into a coma, as he met the worried, smothering face of his wife. “Oh Eddie bear!”

Myra was loud, almost screaming, causing his sense of hearing to jolt back into action. His face scrunched up and he lifted his hand, a tube attached to it that was clearly delivering fluids into his system. “M-Myra please-” He stopped as the sound of his voice took Eddie by surprise. It was hoarse and every word spoken felt like glass was being dragged up and down the inside of his throat.

She didn’t bother asking Eddie how he felt, or even so much as caring about the fact that he was awake. Instead she got up off of the chair, rushing out of the room, screaming for a nurse. It didn’t take long for the room to be swarmed with the medical employees, nurses and doctors alike.

“Good to see you awake, Mr Kaspbrak, you had quite the accident,” The doctor announced, holding his clipboard and checking all of Eddie’s main vitals. “I know you must be confused and disorientated, and I want to allow you to rest properly. I just have a few questions for you, if that’s okay?”

Slowly, Eddie nodded his head, unable to do anything more as the last thing to finally come back to him was his feeling of pain, and fuck, was he in a lot of it. His whole body, from his head to his toes, felt like it was on fire. He felt like every bone in his body had been broken and then put back into place. His chest was heavy, his throat was aching and there was a constant feeling of nausea which he knew was caused by the morphine.

“Do you remember anything?” The doctor asked, before quickly adding, “Don’t speak, as your throat is going to be sore. We had to fit a tube in to help you breathe and feed you solids. Blink once for yes and twice for no.”

Eddie blinked once. He could remember every tiny little detail of what happened. From the moment he was skewered through the chest by a demonic child eating clown, to the moment he woke up due to Myra’s screeching voice.

“Alright, that’s good. That means there was no brain damage due to blood loss.” The doctor grinned and continued with his routine questions. “You are very lucky, Mr Kaspbrak. I can’t say I’ve had many people who have been brutally stabbed through the chest come out alive on the other end. Someone was clearly looking down on you.”

The minute the doctor spoke those words, Eddie thought of Stan, which then made him think of the Losers. Where were they? Shouldn’t they be here?

“W-Where-” Eddie croaked, his eyes flickering around the room. God his eyes were starting to feel heavy, and he could feel his consciousness slipping away. He didn’t even get to finish his sentence before he was fast asleep, head slumping against the pillow.

* * * * *

When Eddie woke up again, there was more light in the room and a nurse was standing at the bottom of his bed. Their eyes met and he managed to smile at her, earning him a smile back as she walked over to the top of the bed, taking a seat on the edge. “How are you feeling?”

“A-” Eddie started, swallowing just a little. His throat didn’t feel as harsh this morning which he was thankful for. “A little- b-better.” He turned his head to the side and spotted the cup of water, “M-May I?”

“Of course,” The nurse smiled, reaching for the cup and bringing it to his lips, allowing him to take a long, soothing sip that trickled down his throat, cooling it as his went. “Do you need me to call the doctor? Or your wife?”

The thought of having Myra back, with her loud booming voice, made Eddie cringe and he shook his head. He turned to the other side, hoping to see one of his friends, but there was nothing but an empty chair. “Where- where are my friends?” He managed out and the nurse looked at her feet.

“Your wife sent them away when she arrived,” she explained, patting his knee softly. “She thought it was their fault you were so injured and as your next of kin, we could only do what she wanted.” As she spoke, Eddie wanted to be sick. Myra had turned away the only people who had ever truly cared about him, the people who had essentially saved his life when he believed he was a lost cause. The hadn’t given up on him.

“I-” Eddie started and had to stop to take more water. “I want to see my friends, I want someone to let them know I’m awake.”

A loud gasp from the door caused Eddie’s head to turn to the side. Myra was standing there, her eyes narrow and full of shock. She looked at the nurse, pointing a finger at her. “I told you to tell me the second he woke up! Out, I want you out!”

The nurse opened her mouth to protest but Myra just got louder and more boisterous. “OUT!”

“Stop-” Eddie groaned, lifting the hand that was not hooked up to the drip and pinched his nose. “Myra she was doing her job, please don’t leave.” He asked the nurse and she nodded, moving back to the bottom of the bed, but she was much more tense. “Myra- I want you to call my friends. Please.”

“Eddie-bear,” Myra shook her head, walking over to him and taking his hand. “They aren’t your friends. They left you for dead! How can you call that friendship.” Eddie knew that wasn’t true, because if they had left him for dead, his body would never have been recovered. He would be rotting all that way underground, surrounded by nothing but rubble.

He shook his head at her, using his most serious expression. “You and I both know that’s not true.” Eddie sighed, “Why are you even here? Why did you come? I told you before I left for Derry that I wanted a divorce.”

Myra blinked at him, her eyes narrowing just a little, “You weren’t in your right mind Eddie-bear, you still aren’t. You need me to take care of you! You need me, Eddie.”

“No- no I don’t,” Eddie croaking, tears stinging his eyes. “How many times have I told you not to call me Eddie-bear. You sound just like my mother and fuck- it’s weird Myra. Our whole relationship is just- weird.” His head thumping and his eyes began to feel heavy. He looked at the drip and realised that the morphine was on a timer, and a new dose had been delivered into his bloodstream. “When I wake up, I expect them to be here.”

Myra’s scowl was the last thing he saw as he succumbed to sleep once more.

* * * * *

Eddie blinked his eyes open, expecting to still see the scowling face of his soon to be ex-wife, but instead the sight that greeted him was much more welcoming. There, sitting in the chair, his head dropped forward as he slept, was Richie. He looked terrible, scruffy, and that that nap was the first round of sleep he’d had in weeks.

He had also never looked more beautiful.

How Eddie had managed to go the whole trip back to Derry without telling Richie how he felt, how he had always felt, was past him. Every time Richie had opened his mouth, had spilled out a ridiculous joke, the words had been on the tip of his tongue. Even when Eddie had saved him from the deadlights, moments before his almost fatal stabbing, Eddie didn’t know why he didn’t just seize the moment and kiss the other man.

Well, actually he did know. He was scared. Scared that Richie would turn him away and find him disgusting.

He wasn’t scared anymore, not after he almost died and especially not after hearing Richie’s confession when he was in his coma. Now though, now he wanted to hear them when he was awake, and while he was able to say them back. “Rich-” he croaked, reaching a hand over and touching his arm. “Rich. Wake up.”

The second his hand touched Richie’s the man was jolting awake and staring at Eddie as though he had seen a ghost. It took a moment for his brain to catch up, and when it it, tears started to trail down his cheeks as he moved closer to the bed. “Eds, fuck, you’re awake.”

“I’m awake,” Eddie breathed back, settling his head comfortably against the pillow. He was still tired, and his chest was still in immense pain. He wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. “You’re crying…”

“I thought you were dead,” Richie breathed, taking Eddie’s hand in his own and bringing it up to his lips, kissing the skin with such tenderness Eddie could have started crying too. “Your body, it was so still, so...so lifeless. If I hadn’t managed to find a pulse, a weak one, you could have been presumed dead.”

Eddie lifted his hand to cup Richie’s cheek, brushing away the tears with his thumb, “I’m not dead though, I’m alive. You saved me.” He closed his eyes for a moment and then opened them again. “I’m sorry Myra sent you away, she had no right.”

“I didn’t want to leave,” Richie admitted, choking back a laugh. “The nurse had to drag me out, apologising the whole time. The other losers got me back to the town house because we knew that Myra wouldn’t hesitate getting the police involved if she had to. I mean- I have already been questioned about Henry.”

Oh shit, Henry. “You- and what did they say?”

Richie shook his head, “I told them the truth, that he was an escaped mental patient who was about to kill my friend, so I acted in self defence. They agreed with me, and they realised he was a dangerous human. He had killed four security guards at the hospital.”

“You did what you had to do, and I’m glad the police were on your side,” Eddie smiled, swallowing thickly. “Uh, I know that this probably isn’t the best time and all but- but I can’t keep this to myself any more. I’ve wasted too much time already.”

Tilting his head to the side, Richie moved a little closer, placing his other hand over Eddie’s so they were both holding his hand, “What’s up, Eds? You can tell me anything, you know that right?”

“Of course I do. I’ve always known.” Eddie smiled, weakly, but it was there. “I love you, Richie. I- I love you. I always have. I was just- fuck- too scared to tell you because I didn’t know how you’d react. Then- when I was in my coma I heard you, you told me how you felt. You told me about the kissing bridge and I- I knew I had to tell you the moment I woke up.”

Richie was staring at him now, with huge wide eyes and his jaw slack open, “You- fuck- you heard me?” He asked and then he blinked. “Wait- you love me? Like- love me love me?”

For the first time since well, he was a kid, Eddie let out a genuine laugh. He nodded his head, squeezing Richie’s hand back tight, “Yes idiot. I love you, love you. I’m in love with you. Crazy, I know, but it’s true.”

More tears were streaming down Richie’s cheeks now, but he was smiling like a mad man. He dropped his head onto their hands for a moment before looking back up, wiping away some of his tears. “Damn, fuck Eds. I love you. So fucking much.”

They fell into a soft silence, just staring at one another, drinking each other in. Eddie was waiting, waiting for Richie to close the distance between them, but it never came. Carefully, he cleared his throat, “Rich?” He asked and Richie hummed, looking at him with a slight frown. “Why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

Richie choked and Eddie held back the urge to giggle at how flustered he was, “I- fuck Eds...you’re married! You- you have a wife.”

Eddie shook his head, “No- we’ve separated. Before I came to Derry. I told her that I was leaving her, that I didn’t love her anymore. We’re not together anymore.”

“Well why didn’t you say that sooner?!” Richie gasped and then he was leaning over Eddie and their lips were meeting in a soft, yet deep kiss. Even though Richie looked like a homeless person, and Eddie was literally back from the dead, both of them at what could be their worst, it was still the best damn kiss Eddie had ever had. Slowly, Richie pulled away and sat back, laughing as he ran a hand through his crazy curls.

“What?” Eddie asked, knowing there was something on his mind.

Richie blinked, shaking his head at how well Eddie could read him, “Does that mean you don’t have a home?

Eddie blinked and a soft smile broke out on his face. “Maybe not physically, but don’t you see? I do have a home. I have a home in the Losers and their friendship. I have a home right in front of me, because Richie, youare my home.”

Yes. Richie was his home. He always was, and he always would be.

* * * * *

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @that-weird-girls-blog @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @thundercatseddie @eduardoandale  @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @deadlighten @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist @tozierking @s-onora @atownofeggs

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #writing tag

[butter3drainbows]

Title: Drunk Rice

Summary: Just a soft fic of Drunk! Risotto being touchy with his family friends.

(reposted this for all the pipz out there who spent their Valentines with friends and family. Happy Valentine’s Day yall🌹👌😂😘)

Music blared from the sound system as the club lights cast their blinding rays across the dancing bodies on the dancefloor. Formaggio and Pesci could be seen dancing, awkwardly in the case of the latter, from the table that the rest of the gang had occupied. Their group had just come from the hospital after paying their friend a visit from the ICU.

Gelato had only sustained minor injuries from the car crash, a few cuts and bruises here and there. Sorbet who had been behind the wheel had taken the brunt of the accident, sustained head trauma and a few broken bones.

Melone had insisted to go to the high end clubs (his treat) to loosen up after being assured by the doctors that their friends were in stable condition and are expected to have a full recovery.

News of the accident had rattled everyone but all of them knew who was distressed by the news the most.

“R’mber when you got fucked up by a train?”

Prosciutto sighed putting his drink down as he bore Risotto’s almost two hundred pound weight around his shoulders. Melone and Illuso snickered from across their round table as they captured the rare moment of Risotto, the serious and composed head recognized by the gang, inebriated and slurring; his speech less refined after too much of the expensive stuff Melone had ordered for them.

“I don’t think anyone would forget their near-death experience, Risotto.”

“That messed me*hic* messed me up so bad Pros,” Risotto cut in. He slammed his hand on the table jolting the empty bottles on top as well as the nearby patrons around their table.

“Why fuck were you even *hic* on the tracks? Don’t ya know tha’s dangerous?”

Prosciutto looked absolutely miserable which had Melone snorting a laugh. Illuso wasn’t doing any better, already doubled over and pounding the table with his fist. Prosciutto struggled to support Risotto’s upper body as the latter recounted the events that had almost gotten his friend killed as a child while making uncoordinated gestures with his hand.

“Always*hic* aaaaaalways tellin’ you guys*hic* t’be careful. ‘very year summun’ ends up *hic* in the fucking hospital…” Risotto shook his head removing his arm from Prosciutto’s shoulders, to the blonde’s relief, to pour himself another round. The amber liquid spilled on the side of his glass as he did, his motor skills not quite catching up with his intoxicated brain.

“Drink another round and you’ll be next.” Prosciutto chided before snapping his fingers at a passing cocktail waitress and ordering some water. He winced at the strain he had to endure on his shoulders as he stretched them to relieve the tension. His eyes signaled for Illuso to distance the alcohol from Risotto’s reach which meant collecting them all to one far-off side where Risotto’s long arms can’t reach. “That’s your last shot for tonight now drink your water and sober up a little. I’m not going to be one who’s going to haul your huge ass out of this club again if you don’t.”

Risotto laughed, the dimples on his cheek deepening the more he grinned, “You’d make *hic* a great nurse Pros.”

Prosciutto rolled his eyes “I am a nurse, Risotto. We work in the same hospital ah ah…!” Prosciutto stopped the burly arm that reached towards the collection of alcohol on Illuso’s side and slid a glass of water in front of the pouting mass of muscle.  

“Look at his face!” Illuso all but wheezed at the face Risotto was making, lip jutting out and red eyes sulking as he took a sip from the glass of water. Melone casted his eyes towards Ghiacco who had been slowly inching away from Risotto for the past few hours as he made his descent into intoxication.

“Well aren’t we silent today eh Ghiacco?”

Ghiacco’s eyes shot towards Melone dangerously, mouthing “Fuck.off.” at his grinning friend. He stiffened and muttered a curse when he felt the heavy weight of Risotto’s arm around his shoulder followed by the undeniable stench of alcohol.

“Ghiacco~”

Ghiacco chanced a cautious look at the direction of the drawl and was met with mirthful red eyes.

Fuck that’s unsettling. Ghiacco thinks he might never accept a grinning Risotto as something natural.

“Why’rnt ya drinking?”

“Leave him alone Risotto. You know he’s allergic to alcohol.”

The look on Risotto’s face can only be registered as surprise as he passionately expressed his disbelief and distress at the fact that his friend cannot properly enjoy any sort of alcoholic drink.

“Hey hey what’s happenin he-Hooooly shit!” Formaggio laughed when he caught sight of Risotto’s drunken state.  “Is Risotto drunk? Already?”

“What does it look like?” Prosciutto grumbled as Formaggio and Pesci took their seats around the table while Melone started to arrange drinks for them.

“Your kid is weak Pros. I had the ladies all round up for him and he still managed to bore them away.”  

“B-but I did as you told me and struck a conversation.”

“You think chicks would be into the logistics of fishing with lures vs. fishing nets?”

“I-it’s the only thing I could think about…” Pesci trailed off forlornly, disappointed at having his efforts fail even with the help of his fratello.

“We’ll have to work with your conversation skills. Get yourself a drink and maybe you’ll act less like a mamoni with some alcohol in your system.” Prosciutto scolded. What was he gonna do with this kid?

From beside him he watched Risotto continue to harass Ghiacco, the latter looking like he wanted to be anywhere else but beside the older man beside him. He scoffed, “Yes suffer as I did” he thought.

“I r’mbered when I first met’ya*hic*. Arrogant lil’ shit wasn’t he Pros?” Ghiacco winced knowing the memory too well. Risotto laughed through his nose remembering something, “But not as*hic* not as arrogant as ‘luso the day I met ‘im tha’s for sure.”

“Hey!”

A round of laughter resounded around the table. Risotto’s eyes become serious as he trained them on Ghiacco.

“You’re alright now though, aren’t you Ghiac?”  

“Yeah.”

“You can always talk to me. You know that right, fratello?”

“Tsk I know that.” Ghiacco’s tone was haughty but didn’t faze Risotto, “Life’s been less shitty so I don’t have anything to tell you.”

“Hmm tha’s good.”

Prosciutto’s lips twitched as he watched the resident hothead and the youngest of the group nod awkwardly at Risotto’s drunken mini-tirades. Prosciutto came to realize that this band of troublemakers had the common denominator of meeting Risotto first before coming together. Each had their own stories to tell, most of them not good like Ghiacco’s, but they had each other growing up which helped them in a way to not be consumed by the troubles of their past. They were all indebted to each other in some way and as Prosciutto sloshed his drink around his glass eyeing the people around his table, he couldn’t help but admit how grateful he was to be friends with this particular group of idiots.

He was pulled from his thoughts at the sound of glass shattering and he cursed at Risotto who apparently was not able to control the force of him “tapping” a wineglass with a spoon. He was unapologetic, muttering a half-meant “oops” as he put down the remains of the shattered glass on the table.

“I have something to say.” All attention was focused on Risotto. His voice had sobered considerably which meant he was about to drop some serious talk. After a while, his red eyes regarded the people surrounding the table.

“You know I love you guys right? I mean to me,” he gestured to all of them in an awkward wave, “you are all family. And family is important to me so please please take better care of yourselves. What happened last week should be the last time I see a brother wheeled into the ER covered in their own blood.”

Risotto listened to their sounds of agreement with Formaggio and Illuso drawing out “sooorry Risottoooo~” in the background. Risotto nodded, satisfied with their response.

“Siamo una famiglia, si?”

A collection of yeahs sounded from around the table. Melone raised his glass for a toast dedicating it to their years of friendship and the years to come. Each grabbed their own with Prosciutto slipping Risotto’s glass of water towards his wandering hand when it went too close to a shot glass. The others followed suit with loud exclamations of salud around the table. Prosciutto stopped mid-sip when he heard sniffles beside him.

“Jesus, Risotto…” He watched Risotto wipe his tears with his handkerchief, his eyes down casted but his lips smiling. The next thing he knew, Risotto was reaching towards him with his arm pulling the smaller man in a tight hug.   

“Ti voglio bene fratello.” Prosciutto clicked his tongue but returned the embrace anyway patting Risotto’s broad back as he mumbled small messages of thanks against his shoulder. His strained voice told Risotto to let up on his grip before he suffocates and the larger man released his hold around him but not before leaving a kiss on Prosciutto’s forehead. He then faced a wide-eyed Ghiacco, his intention the same but his messages considerably longer consisting of words of advice telling him to be less angry and how he will always see him as a baby brother.

“What the fuck, who’re you calling a baby brother. I’m a fucking grown ass man…” Ghiacco mumbled in his seat hiding the redness of his cheeks with his glass as he took a sip of his drink and rubbed the kissed spot on his cheek. It was clear that it was Risotto’s plan to embrace everyone when he got up from his seat and slowly walked his away around to the other side of the table. Illuso, not one for hugs, cursed and was ready to bolt from his spot but was held down by Formaggio and Melone.

“Let him.” Prosciutto sighed waving his hand exasperatedly, “Just…let him.”

 Risotto was a force to be reckoned with when he’s drunk and touchy, any attempts to deter him from hugging someone would be futile. He simply won’t stop until he has managed to wrap his arms around his target and say what needs to be said.  

“Now now, Illuso. Rice hugs are rare so you gotta enjoy this once in a lifetime treat.” Melone laughed.

“Yeah, ladies and gentlemen would kill each other for one of these. You’re lucky to get one for free.” Formaggio laughed alongside Melone as they held down their struggling friend.

Risotto managed to finish his personal mission of showering his friends with acts of affection with a little difficulty from Illuso as he was nearly the same size as him. Formaggio and Melone, he had no trouble with; the both of them meeting his embrace with open arms while muttering their own words against each other’s shoulders. Last was Pesci who he whispered a secret about Prosciutto caring for him more than he let on and that he shouldn’t let his harsh words get to him because he only wanted him to be the best that he could be. By the end of the hug, Pesci was tearing up on his own which caused Prosciutto to scold him again for being soft.

Boy’s night didn’t end until four am in the morning as all of them had no other plans or work scheduled for that day. Risotto as well as several others ended up being wasted after Formaggio funded another two rounds of the bar’s stronger selections. Prosciutto was all hissy about it of course cursing more than Ghiacco throughout the whole ordeal of chucking full grown men into the seats of his and Ghiacco’s car while threatening anyone who would dare ruin his car’s interior. Ghiacco was surprisingly silent throughout the process thinking that the blonde was cursing enough in two languages for the both of them. All had made it home safe that morning, each suffering through the effects of last night on their own by the time they woke up.

#SFW #FriendshipFloof #LaSquadra #RisottoNero #Prosciutto #Melone #Formaggio #Pesci #Illuso #Gelato #Sorbet #Ghiacco #InkButter