#which is one of my safe foods so i really dont mind it lmao i had it like 6 times last week alone

[famewolf]

it's that time of the paycheck where you really gotta get creative with meal options

#[static] #breakfast today is 3 chicken nuggets in a forgotten bag in the back of the freezer #and a quarter bag of freezer burned curly fries that ive been saving for such an occasion #its lookin like beans and rice again boys #which is one of my safe foods so i really dont mind it lmao i had it like 6 times last week alone #its nice cuz a single can of beans and a box of wild rice = 3 meals #which is exactly what i did yesterday #though id love to learn how to make good tortillas cuz the price of them has gone up a lot at the store #but they last forever so i usually just get the huge bag when it goes on sale and then have enough to last the month

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

no like. think about it. eclipse was created because his people were defeated and a dying species already, and they came to earth to hopefully restore the black arms SO THEY DONT FUCKING DIE LMAO??? and he doesn't instantly go apeshit like even though he was created to destroy shadow and is plagued by being made in his image aka not his own person (cough shadow cough metal sonic) but he asks shadow to join him. against his orders btw. and then tries to mind control shadow to cooperate instead of just like, y'know, killing him. basically begging for an ally.

then later on eclipse gets thrown to earth with the eggs as he literally begs to help back home (because unlike literally other black/dark arm antagonist he ACTUALLY fucking cares about his species' survival). oh then black death fucking dies and so does the eye so eclipse is furious and also hurt (very reasonable that's his dad basically?!?)

to make matters worse, in the crash landing only 4 of the hatchlings survived. 4. yeah that's a real strong generation guys like ??? he's distraught he's so relieved when he finds survivors just look:

like??? look how pure he is i'm so mad about it:

he's literally just this young dude thrown into existence to save his dying people, and then disobeys orders to try and make sure everyone he knows is safe and happy BUT THEN ALSO BEFRIENDS THE GUY HE'S SUPPOSED TO KILL NOT ONCE BUT TWICE BC HE DOES IT AGAIN LATER AND WANTS A DAMN FAMILY MEMBER??? EVEN AFTER SHADOW & CO KILLED HIS DAD???

like. some people might argue "well he still wants to harvest the earth" uh yeah because food? He'll do anything to protect his people that's not inherently wrong just help the dude by giving him a different source because using earth is all he knows? sure he's the only black arms with free will (lmao in your face shadow) but he tried to ask for shadow's help numerous times and that fucker denied him. like. SHADOW. MY DUDE. YOU ARE MAKING AN ENEMY HERE. HELP ECLIPSE RESTORE HIS (ACTUALLY BOTH OF YOUR) ENDANGERED SPECIES/ALIEN RACE WITHOUT IT HURTING ANYONE SO EVERYONE WINS???

i think shadow should have said yes but worked with eclipse to find sustainable food for the black arms that wouldn't hurt others so they could get an ally and a family member out of it. imagine eclipse ruling the black arms which restores them to full power??? AND THEN THEYRE REALLY STRONG ALLIES IN CASE OTHER THREATS COME ALONG LIKE IMAGINE SEASON 3 OF SONIC X BUT SORTA LIKE 06 WITH A VIBE OF SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG 2 WHERE AT ONE POINTS HE CALLS ON ECLIPSE (revealing the now prosperous colony) TO HELP ASSIST SONIC & CO??? AND IT WORKS???

oh my god. since they're potentially not forced to stick around earth for food they could explore the galaxies. why couldn't the black arms eventually SOS shadow because these extremely advanced aliens are wrecking their shit and stealing everything and draining them because these dudes are basically gods and shadow is like "okay i'll get help" because these godly aliens will eventually find earth. oh turns out these are the babylonians! yeah! like they found the REAL babylon (planet) not just the measly scavenger ship that crashed to earth and caused all that riders crap + gave us the babylon rogues.

why. why couldn't we have this. SEGA i'm so disappointed this is why i used to never bring up archie because while i admit i haven't reread the comics in years and thus the nostalgia and bias might have warped my memory of events... eclipse deserved better. we could have had really cool allies but instead they went with a second black arms genocide. grrrrrr

#bsc canon lore #bsc words #archie sonic #eclipse the darkling #the black arms #shadow the hedgehog #sonic x #the babylon rogues

[flockofdoves]

i recognize that cats are like. infamous for begging for food and meowing like theyve never been fed in their lives

and also i recognize when i first moved in my roommate was like 'don't worry if the cat meows at you her old owner overfed her so she's always begging for food but i have her on a special diet with specific proportions on a regular schedule so you don't have to feed her when she begs at you'

but also with my roommate leaving for a week without telling us and just setting out extra food but then not responding at all to my texts (or acknowledging this at all after she got back) i sent 4 days into that week when the cat almost was out of food asking if she was coming back that day or should i start feeding her cat and if so what portions she feeds her cat and at what times. plus also that while idk how much cats poop per bowel movement, it does seem to me like the litter box looks almost as full as it was when i scooped it after 4 days of my roommate being gone and she pooped on the floor (i feel really bad about that i should have looked up how often litterboxes should be scooped as soon as i noticed my roommate set out extra food for her, even if ofc she should've given a heads up or timeline or any info when me and my gf have been clear we've never lived w cats before)

like. it makes me not sure what to trust :(

like i almost never see her feed her and i recognize we have kinda different schedules (although a lot of times shes home but just in her room and i cant hear her so dont even realize shes home) and that the cat eats fast the times i have seen her eat so its hard to figure out the situation

and it sucks bc theres like no safe side to lean on bc either way could be harmful for the cat if i'm mistaken

the only real way to know would be something deranged and unethical like a camera monitoring the litterbox and food bowl lmao. so like idk the only normal solutions i can think of are just like. trying to spend as much time as possible downstairs on days when me and my gf aren't doing anything to see what happens? taking pictures of the empty bowl to see if the crumb positions look different later and taking pictures of the litterbox to see if it looks worse later? but even then its not very conclusive

and of course i'd love to propose like. idk. putting up a little white board seeing if shes got fed yet but. shes not my cat and im not the one directly responsible for feeding her and proposing that potentially either could sound like i dont trust my roommate or some ridiculous thing to assuage my anxiety that makes her do extra work or if she really is hiding neglect that wouldn't necessarily do much depending on what her routine is compared to mine and also maybe proposing that would make boundaries unclear and make her think she could rely on me for stuff like that without having to communicate it first

idk part of me worries also considering that shes started just like. taking me and my gfs dishes (which are in an entirely separate cabinet) and using them when never asking if thats cool with us as roommates. and like theoretically i love to share things ofc as long as people are considerate but some of those dishes and pots have been sitting out dirty for over a week now so unless i see her around (feel insane like just jumping to texting about that) im sure at this rate me and my gf will have to clean these encrusted dirty dishes and pots and stuff whenever we need them again, that maybe despite her saying before that i wouldnt need to worry about feeding the cat, that somehow without communicating either that as an expectation when i've checked in with her about her preferences in cohabitating or communicating details to us as ppl w no experience taking care of cats that she expects taking care of her cat to be an equal task for all of us. and like of course the most important thing to me is that this cat is healthy and okay and i wouldn't mind helping out even if i'd slightly prefer not having the responsibility of a pet foisted on me at this point in my life and from past communication expected just like. vibing while she took care of it as her pet. but god that just needs to be communicated by her. itd be scary to me if there is neglect happening and if it was happening that it was happening bc she just expected me and my gf to know exactly when and what to do with every day cat care.

so yeah. ig just gonna try my best to monitor stuff over the next couple days to understand the situation better and just communicate from there :(

any advice appreciated tho tbh god idk

#cpost #animal neglect -

[lesbianwilby]

howdy wil! Answer any or all of these if you want :D

violet— do you like to cook or bake? if so, what is it that you like to make?

azalea— what is the most recent song you listened to? how do you feel about it?

lotus— what is your favorite color and in what shade? e.g. sage green, navy blue, ect. dahlia— do you like to follow current fashion trends or do you have a particular style that you prefer to stick to?

HELLOOOOOOO thank u for adding the questions w ur ask i an in the middle of watching youtube videos n i dont have the brainpower to copy/paste these LMAO (so sory i didn't for u i do not think very well)

violet: i do sometimes!! theres not a lot of food or ingredients n shit in my house n cant rly buy like .any n also massive lack of energy so i cant a lot but i love cooking n baking even if its usually just helping my mom 🫶 im very fond of making things w chicken massive safe food 4 me in many ways

azalea: salamander by deco*27‼️ i adore this song SO much i just have to ignore that its about cup noodles and im good .most recent english song tho would be electioneering by radiohead which!! is actually my current favorite song off of ok computer :3

lotus: this is such a hard question for me to answer bc im so odd w colors 😭 i think?????? probly like a dark brick red.. overall i tend to stick more to color schemes vs specific colors n .all my color schemes tend to center around either red or neutrals so

dahlia: RAHHHHHH FASHION QUESTION so. for me its kinda a mix of both? it REALLY depends on the trend n who i see in it n how accessible it is to me n if i actually LIKE it.. like im not going to sit here n deny that my style has never been influenced by or even changed by trends bc thatd be a goddamn lie but also its not been like. a permanent change ig???? leme like share examples to fully explain

so heres two outfits i wore in 2021, first was sometime in summer second was during october or september probs?? now obviously these aren't like the same exact style but like in my brain n for how i dress they come close enough (also yes i had my hair dyed red two times in a row .no they were not the same shade or anything. btw think in second picture i already had my mullet why didnt i wear my hair up wth was up w that)

these r some more recent outfits!! first one is actually the most recent picture i have of any of my outfits i wore it to a job interview :3 and yes the three others have the same exact top and yes i am wearing the same two pairs of pants in these and yes i did wear both my necklace and pocket watch with them all and yes i did carry the same bag .my style has been toned down a LOT recently tbh n im ngl its def been at least partly influenced by trends.. i dont mind it tho its comfy n cute n i dont have to think much

however sometimes i do still go back to my "old" style that never rly left tbh (in the og pics the only thing i dont have anymore is the skirt n thats bc i dont wear those colors rly anymore).. first one was sometime this summer? second time i think was last month actually!!

n like even still w my toned-back style n shit i still make 3d kandi cuffs n i still listen to music that someone who would see me in passing wouldn't expect n even if these outfits r "tame" bc im way too lazy to go n find pictures from high school (my kandi cuffs used to get worn almost daily + my beloved reflective galaxy platforms have gotten so scuffed from the steps to the front 🫶) they're still pretty different in my mind i think to what i wear now so like .yeah what i wear out has been influenced by whatever trend i see on tiktok however its never been fully based on that 4 many reasons n the old parts of my style never rly "leave" they just get pushed back until a later time

#out there #i still have all of my bows n hair clips that overflow my accessory drawers n my tutus n my t-shirts from hot topic #bc even if its not me rn it was at one point n probs will be again #ngl. i very easily could've explained this both better + w/o these pictures LMAO #i just love showing off my outfits even old ones even tho these r TERRIBLE examples #unfortunately i don't have a lot of older examples bc i used to be rly insecure so i never took pictures EVER #so a lot of those outfits rly got lost to time #do have quite a few more recent outfits tho #including several where i wear my bralettes as tops .man those r cute outfits i love every single one #anyways .rly did use this as an excuse to share some of my (not greatest unfortunately) outfits oops ! #ty for asking that question at least tho 🫡 #ive always been a bit w fashion but it got a lot more extreme during my senior year #cuz yk .2020 tiktok had an impact on me n my style LMFAO #n that slowly ran out probs towards very end of 2021 where i never rly went out anywhere n if i did it was usually a basic outfit #n then .now again kinda following trends ig at least in what i see but to me its just like #ive always thought these styles were cute n now this gives me the push i needed to start wearing them #yk? #i think im rly just saying shit my brain is mush #ive had todays alpharad gold upload just paused on my tv while typing all this LMAK #pls dont judge my outfits too hard 🙏 #ik theyre all kinda copy/paste esp w the items i wear #n to most people on here u wouldn't call any of these n tbh i wouldn't either #but in my defense i have always struggled with very low energy levels SO #done rambling if i forgot something ill edit idfk #ty for the ask again btw :3 #ask #sparksnevadas #also fun fact! on tumblr mobile when answering asks u cant see ur whole tags w/o posting or saving to drafts #so if this seems very incoherent its bc i literally forgot what i just said n had no way to check n tried not to repeat things

[clouds-rambles]

Yellow~ may i have a request in which in one of reader's adventures they find themselves in a situation where they ingest what's supposed to be an aphrodisiac (but they dont know that only we do) instead they get the opposite symptoms. Such as the idea of sex becomes repulsive to them, physical contact with anyone immediately puts her in a very bad mood, sfw stuff like that. Now their lover has to deal with social distancing and absent hugs and kisses for more than a few days.

Thank you

Anon your brain is very big this is a very cool idea

Hope you don’t mind me choosing Venti for this scenario lmao

Pairings; Venti x reader

Warning(s); 

Keep reading under the cut!

“Man I feel horrible” you say as you settle down beside Venti after your week long excursion into the Mondstat wilds. Venti had things to do so you went on your adventure by yourself

“Did you get hit or something?” the bard asks gesturing you to shuffle to your side so he can give you a shoulder rub

“Not more than normal no” you respond, you flinch back when Venti’s hands finally reach your back “That was weird, like uncomfortable” you comment. The bard holds his hands up in mostly mock hurt

“Did I hurt you?” he asks, you shake your head

“No, it just felt really uncomfortable you know...” you trail off into thought “Oh now that I think on it, I did eat some Valberries” Venti blinks at you a few times

“And you’re feeling averse to touch?” he asks furrowing his brows “Why’d you eat them anyway? They’re aphrodisiacs” he adds trying to work out what’s happening

“What? Really?” you question earning a nod from your boyfriend, you shuffle back around so your back is on the seat “I see Lisa eat those things all the time so I thought they were safe.” you add before realising your words “Why is Lisa eating them in that case?” you question

“I don’t think we want to know” Venti offers trying his best not to think about the question, “If you’re feeling averse does that mean no touching until it wears off?” Venti asks with a pout, you nod

“I suppose so”

The three days are pain for Venti, he has to stop himself from giving you unexpected hugs, he can’t kiss you, you don’t even sleep in the same bed as him because he’s so prone to hugging you when you sleep. But, as much as you’ve tried to do these things you feel a little sick, and sometimes a little in pain. Archons forbid that Venti even brings up the idea of sex amongst all this, you’ve tried to keep your mind off the still unanswered question but it creeps in whenever Venti gives you desperate glances from across the couch.

Venti finds himself accidently touching you, be it on your back as you’re cooking, nudges with his knee as you sit close to each other, or even brushing his hand with yours to hold before he remembers he can’t. It makes you think about how the two of you are constantly touching in some way, you can’t think of a day where at some point you haven’t just lead yourself down on him.

And in all seriousness you miss the touch. As much as Venti showers you in affection you somehow find yourself even more touch starved than usual, despite the fact it makes you feel ill. You feel a little lonely as you sleep because you’re not reassured by the presence of your boyfriend. You hope this wears off before you actually become too touch averse.

“Checkmate, I win” Venti grins as he knocks down your queen, you pout at him.

“New game” you huff “I am determined to beat you” you chuckle as you both set up the chess board once more

“I feel like my ten win advantage means you’d have to beat me a lot” Venti teases with a wink, you stick your tongue out playfully

“I am going to become the best chess player before this aphrodisiac wears off” you jest with a laugh, Venti laughs alongside you before the two of you start playing your game.

“Checkmate!” you exclaim knocking down Venti’s queen. You grin at him “I told you I would win” you add, Venti smiles at you

Maybe if he can’t kiss you to make you feel better, he’ll sway the game just a little bit to give you a little advantage

“Damn” he jests “Just when I was about to win” he fake weeps causing the both of you to laugh once more

“What? No” you jest “I swept the board with you” you add with a chuckle.

The two of you banter over the next few games continues before the two of you notice Lisa and Jean doing their evening rounds.

“The two of you are usually on top of each other. Something happen?” Lisa asks as she directs herself and Jean to walk towards the two of you. You smile and hum

“I’m feeling a little ill and my stubborn boyfriend insists that he stays near” you lie with a smile

“Oh you poor thing” Lisa sympathises putting a hand on your shoulder, you try your best not to flinch at the contact “I hope it passes over soon” she comforts before the two walk off again

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask her about the valberries” Venti comments with a slight chuckle

“In front of Jean?” you ask with a quirk of your brow, the bard nods and you try not to laugh at the absurdity “I feel like if Jean found out other people know about what she and Lisa do in the bedroom would be a little embarrassing for her” you explain

“Oh so you have an idea of what she does with the valberries?” Venti half teases, you roll your eyes but nod after a few moments. Venti giggles at you

“I just want these ones to wear off though” you sigh, Venti smiles at you

“It’s okay sweet” he comforts “I bet in a month we’ll laugh at this like a good joke” he adds, you nod and sigh again

“I hope so” you pout 

That evening was supposed to be date night, and the two of you decided to go through with the idea, a nice picnic at starsnatch cliff. The two of you sit opposite eachother and eat your food, there’s a light, happy conversation between the two of you. 

About the time it gets a little chilly is usually the time you huddle up together with Venti to watch the sunset, but as much as you natural instinct is to curl up with him you have to stop yourself. 

He does pass you his cape though which you suppose is the best that you can do right now. And it does smell like him so you guess it’s almost like a hug.

“The stars are bright tonight” you comment looking up, you hear Venti hum in agreement

“Not as beautiful as you~” he teases and the both of you laugh. The two of you often mock the cliché lines that lovers often mutter under the stars. And while the two of you often mock it there lies a certain truth behind the words.

As immortal as Venti is, and mortal you are. The fact he chose you amongst the crowd is like choosing a star amongst the sky. 

“I love you Venti” you comment looking over to the bard who’s smiling at you

“And I to, my love” he nods keeping his smile

The valberries only last about half a day longer. And in all honesty, the first thing you do after they wear off is just hug the bard for a good while.

While you may have been with him this whole time, you truly did miss his comfort

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #venti x reader #genshin impact venti #genshin venti venti

[miraeluc]

you have an anxiety attack

prompt: “after a long day you’re just trying to cook for you and your roommate, but when you accidentally switch salt and sugar the stress dawns upon you and you lose it.”

pairing: kaeya x gender-neutral reader

warnings: description of an anxiety attack, explicit language

word count: 1.6k

genre: fluff, angst

rough day? 

no

roughest of the rough 

it started in the morning - all was good until you were all dressed and ready to go

all you needed to do was brush your teeth

of course you dropped toothpaste on your new blouse and had to change because your boss would literally kill you if you strutted in there with toothpaste stains on your clothing 

that didn’t upset you too much anyway,, yep, it kinda sucks but it is what it is

you went to work

that’s when it started to REALLY go downhill

first, you had to sit your ass in this tiny cubicle all day and it remained right on that chair every time you stood up

that’s what it felt like at least

then, you lost data that you’ve been working on for a MONTH

an entire month’s worth data!!!! LOST!!!!

curse you and your issue with forgetting where you put your folders

so you started over

was it worth it? 

no

your boss hated it

you ended up dropping the project overall,, handed it over to a co-worker

your excuse was that you felt too ‘unfit’ for the whole project and he would totally be a better fit!

poor bennett 

bennett is a nice guy, you always hang out with him during break

you usually talk shit about the other co-workers and he just listens and sits there like ◕ ◡ ◕

he’s just there for the food you bring him, really 

he’s a little dumb so he took the project from you with no hesitation

“i’ll do it for you, dont even worry about it, y/n!”

you ended up working overtime 

you had about 7 projects to finish until tomorrow morning and they were all only half-done 

so you got your coffee, turned off your phone and got to work

you finished at 9pm

your work hours are 8am-5:30pm

nope, not having a great time 

well, at least you can go home now!

you pack up your stuff and get up, leaving this hellhole of an office, stretching as you wait for the elevator before checking your phone to see 7 missed calls from your roommate

aka kaeya

aka boy that is most likely emotionally unavailable

aka boy that KEEPS TURNING OFF THE HEATERS TO LEAVE YOU TO FREEZE

his excuse is always that he can’t handle the warmth but you’re sure its so you whine about the cold so he can hug you to warm you up

maybe you have a teeny tiny crush on him???? BUT WHO CAN BLAME YOU 

he’s a whole package - the only thing he’s lacking is emotional availability lmao

which is why you never mentioned the day by day blooming feelings you’ve been developing for him

there would be no positive outcome from you telling him. he would politely turn you down, having to explain yet again that he doesn’t see himself having actual romantic feelings to someone 

you’re content with your current relationship with him

right?

kaeya is known as the fuckboy! of the city

neither of you mind, he’s having his fun

and you know that there’s much more to it 

you’re very happy to have gained his trust enough for him to let his flirty side down when with you, at least

well, there’s no time to ponder over your relationship with him because you’re already sprinting to catch the last bus of the day

right as you got to the station it drove away

fuck

what now?

you have to walk home. alone. in the dark.

oh well. 

usually bennett drives you home but obviously he left earlier

its only a 15 minute walk you can do it

it’s not that bad there’s street lamps hey!

not that bad until it starts to rain, apparently

by the time you get home there’s water in places rainwater shouldn’t be

kaeya is running by the time he hears the front door

“where were you??”

“why didn’t you reply to my calls??”

“do you have a slight idea about how worried i w-”

he stops when he sees your soaked figure and tired expression

“oh, y/n, what happened?” 

he immediately helped you chuck off your wet coat and shoes 

“i worked overtime and missed the last bus so i had to walk home”, you sighed

he nodded and hummed “Go ahead and take a shower then, wouldn’t want you to get sick now, would we?” he winked

you scoffed but nodded anyway

 “yeah, especially in this coLD FUCKING APARTMENT BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO LET THE HEATERS TURNED ON-”

you only heard him laugh before shutting the door in the bathroom and jumping into the shower, needing to warm up because you were sure your toes were about to fall off from the cold

at least the shower went well

:///

you got dressed in lounge attire when you got out of the shower, walking to the kitchen because you were very hungry

you gave bennett all your food today so you didnt have any left

he just looked so hungry

ANYWAYS

you’re in the kitchen, deciding on what to cook

if you ask kaeya he will tell you to just drink wine instead so, no

you kind of want something sweet so you decide to bake cupcakes

kaeya shows up too

“what’re you baking?”

he sat and watched as you gathered all the ingredients you need

“cupcakes. how was your day?”

you strike up a conversation - all you talked about today was work and you need some decent interaction, plus kaeya is a super nice talk partner

“good. i had a day-off today so i layed in bed all day”

you hummed, stirring the eggs and flour 

“how come? you never get off”

“no reason, i was forcibly given a day off- well anyways, what i wanted to tell you about before you worried me because i thoght you were deAD when you didn’t respond, is that i need your help setting up a date for diluc-”

you stopped listening halfway

you were looking at the unopened sugar bag on the counter

you just stirred the sugar in, why is it unopened????

you look over at the open bag of salt

wait a second 

you take out a little dough and taste it

FUCK

“hello??? earth to y/n?? are you even liste-”

he stops himself as soon as you look at him with your lower lip trembling 

uhhhhh

he’s never been in this situation

“y/n?? why are you crying-”

he looks at the counter and the dough, then he sees the salt beside the bowl you were stirring in and leans over to try some

oh, that’s why

“oh come on, is that what you’re crying over?” he snorted

he could barely catch you when you collapsed and started sobbing 

he immediately regreted what he said

“hey, y/n, it’s just a little dough! its okay-” 

you just sobbed and he sat down with you, sighing and pulling you into a tight hug

you felt your lungs constricting and your hands started shaking 

you didn’t even notice how antsy you felt all day until now

you gasped for air and he tightened his grip on you

“w-why am i so worthless?!”

you punched his chest

“i can’t do a single thi-ng with-out messing it up!”

punch

“i’m so us-useless”

punch

“i should just kill m-”

he immediately pulled away and cupped your face before you could finish what you were about to say

“y/n, look at me. you had a bad day - you’re not useless! you’re stressed out! you’re one of the most hardworking people that i know- and, and don’t you ever mention anything about killing yourself! i won’t let you go, not as long as im here”

you were too busy fighting against the constricting feeling in your lungs to notice the tear slipping down his cheek before he hugged you tightly again

your hands gripped at his tshirt

his hand rested over your shaky ones

it broke him

seeing you in such state hurt him so much, he felt his own heart breaking a little with every gasp you took 

“come on, let’s breathe together”

his voice was soft when he spoke to you

he took a deep breath in, you following

you wrapped your arms around him and leaned your head against his chest when breathing out 

hearing his heartbeat made you feel safe

he kept breathing with you until he was more than sure you could breathe comfortably again 

why did he feel like this?

sure, flirting with girls is fun 

and ghosting them is also fun

he usually doesn’t care about hurting them

but why does he feel the need to protect you from all bad things?

and why does your pain hurt him too?

he sighs and shakes his head as if that would clear his mind 

(it doesn’t)

oh well. 

taking care of your needs is more important right now

he picks you up and walks over to the couch, sitting down, placing you on his lap and hugging you 

“you’re not cooking anything, we’ll order takeout.”

you sniffled and nodded 

you did feel your heart flutter a little when he sat you down on him

he’s never done that 

you ignore it and reside into the warmth he gives instead, nuzzling your face into his chest 

he smiles softly and strokes your hair, using his free hand to type in what you were ordering

you both fell into a comfortable silence

at some point he thought you fell asleep lol

“kaeya?”

he rose his brows a little and looked down, humming

“thank you.”

additional notes: welp. this was my first drabble! it was very fun to write and i genuinely look forward to writing more! i’d appreciate it alot if you leave any feedback or even requests for drabbles :-)

#kaeya #kaeya x reader #anxiety #anxiety attack #angst #fluff #diluc #bennett #genshin impact #kaeya alberich #gender neutral s/o #genshin impact x reader #kaeya scenario #genshin impact scenarios #kaeya alberich x reader #kaeya fluff #kaeya angst #genshin impact angst #genshin impact fluff

[princess-of-inarizaki]

Hi honey how‘re you doing?💗 I hope you‘re doing great ♡´･ᴗ･`♡ I wanted to ask if you still do inarizaki manager headcanons, because if you do can I PLEAASE request something? Inarizaki is my comfort team and I really want a girlfriend rn (lmao simp) so can you please write a fic about inarizaki randomly meeting their cute little manager in public with her girlfriend and her girlfriend has her arm around her and then they go talk and find out that they’re dating and the team is actually really suprised that Y/N is kinda „💅“ you know... because she dresses and acts really feminine (like she loves plushies,pink,skirts and shit) so they didn’t really expect this but they‘re really supportive (but kinda sad because they were simps for her -oop) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) YOU DONT HAVE TO OFC if you dont want to write about gay relationships that’s fine no worriesʕ•ᴥ•ʔ It’s just I don’t really like lesbian representation by other writers because they always make her hate feminine stuff, really masculine and I really like your headcanons. AGAIN It’s okay if you don’t want to write it, take care of yourself and please don’t stress yourself💓

Omg heyyy sweetie <3 I'm doing fine!!

Thank you so much for sending in your request! I usually don't reply to requests, since I've been really busy lately. But every once in a while, I see ones like yours in my inbox, and I can't help but write imagines for them, so thank you for this!!

I wish you all the best in finding a girlfriend, love. You're amazing, and any girl would be beyond lucky to have you !! 💖

And yes grrr, the lack of lesbian/gay representation is not okay :( I'll do my best to make sure I write more headcanons for my LGBTQ+ followers in the future :)

Inarizaki's sapphic manager headcanons

If you were to ask any of the boys on the Inarizaki team "which girl do you love most, in this entire world?" they'd say your name in a heartbeat.

Because frankly, those boys adored you to hell and back. It wasn't just because you treated them with so much respect, or that you were an attentive manager, the best they've ever had.

It was because of your kind and sweet nature, and the smallest of things you did which softened those boys to putty whenever you were in their vicinity.

After finding out your favourite colour was pink, Osamu took it upon himself to cook food in different hues of it.

The pink blush on his face whenever you were awed by it, made everything worthwhile. Eventhough it took hours to perfect the pink cupcakes, or shrimp dumplings, you saying "These are all in my favourite colour, 'Samu! Thank you" made it all worthwhile.

Atsumu, after following you home one day to work on volleyball plays together, noticed you collect plushies.

“These are all really cute” he stammered, as he inspected each of them.

A small idea formed in his mind as he gifted you with a plushie, a week after, for your birthday.

“I hope you'll add it to your collection... I named him chibi, I hope you don't mind.”

And Miya Atsumu would never forget the way your eyes lit up after receiving the gift, or the kiss you placed on his forehead as a sign of gratitude.

"Who knew something like that could make her so happy?" He thought giddily.

Suna thought you looked extremely pretty every time you wore a skirt.

He never missed an opportunity to compliment you, or to take a picture of you, looking your absolute best.

“You seem to like wearing skirts, huh?”, “yeah, I always have”

At night, he sometimes looked through his photo album with a soft smile. "She really is the prettiest girl I've ever seen."

Kita finds you small. (Wow borderline size link shjxjsks But please let me explain)

He loves seeing you in his jackets or his hand when comparing to yours, because it makes him feel responsible to protect you. To keep you safe.

In conclusion, they're whipped, your honour. Those boys love you to the Pluto and back, truly.

And it was an unspoken rule that someday, whoever got to date you would take the absolute best care of you. They had the others to worry about if they didn't.

Which led them to wonder. Why hadn't you fallen for any of them yet? Were they not obvious enough?

One cold January day, Akagi realised you were acting strange. “I'm telling you guys, she probably has a boyfriend somewhere!”

The rest of the team stared at him disbelievingly, but Akagi didn't give up. “No I'm telling you, she looks happier than usual and I see her smiling at her phone a lot.”

“I propose we follow her after practice today” said Atsumu. Of course, his ideas were usually radical, and they would've never done such a thing. But they were desperate, did you really fall in love with someone else?

After practice, you waved at them with a small lopsided smile on your face and headed away. Unbeknownst to you, the boys were actually maintaining a distance just so they could follow you.

They ended up in a coffee shop, as you seemed to be waiting for someone.

The look conspicuous. Six boys, all wearing sunglasses. “It's a wonder she hasn't seen us yet” drawled Osamu sarcastically.

Suddenly, a girl slid into a seat opposite yours and placed a gentle kiss on your lips.

Inarizaki.exc has stopped functioning. “So that's why she never liked any of us” whispered Kita with a small smile.

Ever the diplomatic leader, he walked up to you and your girlfriend. “Hi y/n-san, hello miss” he said politely to the both of you. A faint blush could be seen on your cheeks as you figured Kita, and the rest of the boys saw the kiss.

“Kita-san, boys, this is my girlfriend gf/n” you proudly announced, as your fingers found hers' and intertwined them together.

“We're so happy to find out about this, you guys make a lovely couple.” said Aran. The twins diverted their attention to your girlfriend and began peppering her with questions. “How did you guys meet?”, “Who asked who out?”, “Yer' so lucky”

Your heart felt full, it was not everyday that you found out you had the best friends in the universe. “Thanks guys” you whispered through choked sobs, as Suna gently hugged you. “please join us for some coffee”

taglist: @dai-tsukki-desu @k-sakusa-old @pleaseshutup2021 ❤️💛💚💙💜

#haikyuu headcanons #haikyuufanfics #haikyuu fluff #inarizaki #haikyuu!! #inarizaki x reader #inarizaki manager #inarizaki hcs #inarizaki manager headcanons #Inarizaki imagines #atsumu headcanons #osamu headcanons #miya Atsumu #miya osamu #kita shinsuke #ojiro aran #ginjima hitoshi #suna rintarou #suna rintarō #suna headcanons #kita headcanons #akagi imagine #suna imagines #suna rintaro x reader #Osamu fluff #atsumu fluff #suna fluff #lgbt #haikyuu x lgbt reader

[meltwonu]

| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 7]

pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader

this chapter’s notes; camshow, fingering, daddy!kink, dirty talk, ‘cuz you can touch touch me~ 😏 ur gonna need to imagine headband/bandana wearing left&right cheol for this cuz that’s the fantasy i was imagining for this chapter the entire time i was writing it hehe 🍒 quick apologies to anyone who thinks this is moving a little slow 😩 I literally don’t know how to shut up and I end up writing too much LMAO and as always, thank you for the continued interest! Have a great weekend bbys! 💕 

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - ?

dom.cheol has donated $400

therealchan99: yea this is about right on course

dom.cheol: what, did u miss me? 😏

gentleman_josh95: loosely

chwenon: more like the obscenely large donations were missing lolol

You jokingly roll your eyes, exhaling deeply as you push your toys off to the side of the bed. You’d just finished your Saturday show without a hitch, albeit feeling a little lonely. “Aww, c’mon you guys! Don’t tease~” Glancing around the room, it did feel a little odd to you now that Seungcheol wasn’t there but he had called earlier in the day and told you that it might’ve been better if he stayed back.

In truth, you understood exactly how he felt.

Part of you was ready to throw all caution out of the window when it came to Seungcheol and he felt it too. But at the same time, you knew it wouldn’t be that easy and that there were still things that the two of you needed to discuss before deep diving into intimacy, especially when it came to powerplay.

kitty_junjun: hey dont take this in a weird way but like

kitty_junjun: i feel like i saw u earlier today…

universe_WZ: ooo i never thought abt that before

sleepy_wonu has donated $75

xcaliburDK: have ppl recognized u irl before? :o

dom.cheol: i feel like i might’ve seen u irl before too…

Your cheeks bloom a hot pink; a nervous giggle on your lips. “Oh! I mean, yeah, there’s been a handful of times. I’ll wear wigs out sometimes though. Can’t have people calling me out in a grocery store, y’know?”

kitty_junjun: wait so maybe i did see u? I dont wanna give out locations tho…

“Maybe! I’m still out on my little weekend trip and I was out and about earlier~ if you see me next time, don’t hesitate to say hi! I promise I don’t bite~” You pause, leaning closer into the webcam as you wink.

“Unless you want me to~”

You start running a bath right after you end your show, stretching and turning on some music as you start to unwind. Thankfully you didn’t have a tiring show today, so you decided to take the rest of the night to pamper yourself in preparation for your day with Seungcheol.

Biting your lip, you pick up your phone, already seeing a multitude of messages from Seungcheol on your lockscreen.

cheollie ✨: don’t forget ur glass of water!

cheollie ✨: also don’t forget i’m picking you up at 9:30am

cheollie ✨: hope ur ready to spend all day at the roller rink with me baby

You can’t help but grin, already excited to see how Seungcheol spent his day at work. Typing a response, you quickly hit send before setting your phone down onto the nightstand and making your way to the bathroom.

‘I can’t wait! I’m so excited~ u promised me free skates and free food so don’t forget!!’

It’s exactly 9:29AM when Seungcheol messages you that he’s downstairs.

You check yourself in the mirror one last time, smoothing down your dress and hair and grabbing your bag before you rush down to meet Seungcheol. 

There’s a mild feeling of nervousness that pours over you, but you quickly shake it off once you see his blue headed figure standing outside of the lobby.

“‘Cheollie!”

He turns around to face you just as you stop in your tracks; gasping when you see the cute way he’s styled his hair for today. “Whoa… wow, uh, j-just.. Wow. You look great in bandanas...”

Seungcheol laughs, eyes forming crescents. “I don’t usually work the weekends so I thought I’d spice it up a little. Guess it looks good?” You can only nod shakily, mentally cursing yourself when you feel the arousal already pooling inside your body. He winks at you once, opening the passenger’s side door as you slide into his car.

“Hope you’re ready to have a boring day at the roller rink with me.” He gives you a tight lipped smile, shutting your door before he rounds the car to get in on the driver’s side.

“I’m telling you, it’s not going to be… y’know, anything crazy.”

“Who says it has to be! I’m excited to see where you work and anyway you promised!” You tease, poking him in the arm as he starts the car. “I know, I know… I just---I don’t want you to be disappointed. I bet you thought I was some rich old hotshot before, huh?” Seungcheol shoots you a glance, smiling gently.

“Mmm.. not really.”

“No? You didn’t think I was some lonely CEO with loads of money with a thing for camgirls?”

You laugh at his response, placing your hand over his on the gear shift.

“Nah, if there’s anything I thought about you, it was that you were way too nice to be on some camming website.”

The two of you have idle conversation as Seungcheol takes his time to drive to the roller rink. In all honesty, he was a little nervous himself, although he’d never say it to your face.

“Oh my god, is that it?! It’s so cute!”

He parks close to the entrance, turning the car off as he jogs over to your side to help you out. “‘Cheol, you know you don’t have to be so sweet~” You pout, latching onto his arm as he locks the car.

“Oh but I do. You deserve to be spoiled once in a while!”

A blush coats your cheeks yet again, shy eyes fixated on the floor as he walks you towards the entrance. “Yeah, but all you ever do is spoil me… That sybian was no joke and my god, Seungcheol, the price! I almost had half a mind to return it…” You end in a mumble. Seungcheol laughs, opening the door for you as you unlatch from his arm and step in first.

“You’re worth spoiling. Now stop worrying, okay? I promise I’m not up to anything illegal in order to afford your gifts.” Giggling, you lean up to kiss him on the cheek, nodding firmly.

“Fiiiiine, I trust you, y’know?”

“I know, baby. I trust you too, now let’s go meet my best friend who’s going to play butler for you today.”

He leads you over to the concession stand where an equally tall yet bored male stands. “Hey, Jeongguk!” The said male looks up from his phone, eyebrow quirking when the two of you walk up. “Uh, hey Seungcheol-hyung…” Seungcheol feels a weird tenseness fall over the three of you, clearing his throat to get Jeongguk’s attention when he finds the younger male staring.

“Um, this is my friend. She’s---uh, she’s gonna be hanging out here for the rest of the day. I promised her that you’d give her free food, so uh, just--just let me know how much it is so I can tell Namjoon to take it out of my paycheck.” Jeongguk grins, a sly look in his eyes when he finally meets Seungcheol’s concerned eyes.

“Sure! Can I talk to you over there? It’s about our paychecks actually.” Jeongguk turns to you, leaning over the counter. “Sorry, employee only info, ch--uuuuuh, you know the deal.”

“Yeah, of course!”

Jeongguk points off to the side, gesturing to Seungcheol who follows suit.

The younger male makes sure they’re a safe distance away, watching as you pluck your phone out of your purse before he starts talking in harsh whispers. “What the fuck, dude!? You’re---no, you’re not fucking Cherry. She doesn’t have a boyfriend so what the fuck?”

The blood drains from Seungcheol’s face; the feeling in his fingers going numb as his throat goes dry. “Wuh--what? What are you---what are you talking about?” Jeongguk scoffs, eyes rolling jokingly.

“So, hyung, how do you know her?”

“You’re asking me?! How do you know her!?” Seungcheol’s eye twitches just as Jeongguk shoots him an incredulous look, arms crossed in mock annoyance. “I’m a horny boy, what can I say.”

“Please do not ever use those words to describe yourself again.”

The younger male stands in silence, nodding in thought.  

“Fuck, wow, I should’ve noticed. All those extra shifts you were taking, the reason why you could never come hang… You don’t like working here as much as Yoongi-hyung but you--holy---holy shit, wait--you… you can’t be…”

Fuck, here it comes.

“You’re fucking ‘dom.cheol’ aren’t you? You’re the one always leaving her insane fuckin’ donations all the time… and the gifts.. Oh my god. The ‘cheol’ was from Seungcheol, I should’ve known...”

Seungcheol dies a million deaths inside his head; the ringing in his ears becoming unbearable while Jeongguk stares at him in mild disbelief. “It all clocks out, holy fuck. No wonder you were so fucking eager to pick up so many extra shifts…” Seungcheol’s mouth opens and closes a few times, unsure what to say.

“I mean, fuck hyung, I--I’m kind of impressed but wow. You think you know a guy, huh?” Jeongguk laughs, patting the older male on the shoulder. “She’s only one of the hottest camgirls out there right now. You’re a lucky man, hyung.”

A weird possessiveness washes over Seungcheol, hands gently balling up into fists at his side. “Okay, well, she… she’s just here to chill, alright? Don’t do anything weird. And most of all, don’t say anything weird either.” The younger male nods, already walking back to where you were standing.

“Hey, sorry, hyung’s paycheck is gonna be pretty sad next week and I had to let him down gently. Anyway, I’m Jeongguk. You are?”

You give him a fake name; shaking his hand over the counter as he grins at you.

“It’s my pleasure.”

You spend the first two hours on the floor skating; catching Seungcheol’s eyes on you from time to time as he sits nearby cleaning skates. The place seemed pretty empty, which was something that Seungcheol was immensely glad for.

Eventually you skate off out of the rink, making your way to Seungcheol who smiles at you when you come sit next to him. “Told you. Bored already, huh?” The two of you share a laugh, watching as the few other people continue to skate around the rink.

“I mean… it’s different! Right about now I’d usually be six episodes into a new series or something… It’s nice to be somewhere else and doing something different.”

He nods in return, slightly pouting when he turns to face you. “I hate that you have to go home tonight.” You mirror his sentiments, lips quirking into a sad smile.

“I know… I don’t wanna go home…”

Seungcheol bites the inside of his cheek, eyes flitting over to Jeongguk. “Hey, maybe we can bail a little early. This place is pretty dead anyway, and I--I can have Jeongguk clock me out when he leaves. My shift is supposed to end at 3PM and it’s noon now so… We can leave in a hour? Maybe get a late lunch?”

“Seungcheol… I don’t want you to get in trouble…” You mumble, brows furrowing in concern. “Really, it’s okay! We can just hang here ‘til then and still have time to get dinner!” He sighs, knowing you were right. Now was not the right time to be testing the waters with Jeongguk and Namjoon.

“Okay, okay, you win, baby.”

It takes 45 minutes.

45 minutes and a free drink from the concession stand before your mind starts wandering.

You watch Seungcheol converse with Jeongguk behind the concession stand; his cute laugh sending you into orbit when your eyes meet and you can’t stop the thrums of lust pouring over your body when a certain idea pops into your head.

Seungcheol turns his attention back to the younger male and you quickly start to unlace your skates and put your normal shoes back on before Seungcheol’s entire break gets taken up. 

You walk up to the two; Seungcheol cleaning off his hands before he exits from behind the counter.

“Seungcheol…” You softly call out; a look of concern crossing his features when he stops in front of you. “Hey, is everything okay?”

“Yeah, mmhmm! I just--I need to talk to you, if that’s okay?” Jeongguk already turns to leave, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

You drag Seungcheol away, tugging him towards an even emptier part of the roller rink as the concern builds up inside of him. “I have an idea.” He feels himself gulp, already anticipating what you have to say.

“And…?”

“Well… It’s… It won’t t-take long I don’t think, just… hear me out?” You question gently, head tilting cutely up at Seungcheol who already knows he can’t say no to you. “Okay, shoot.”

“Wh--what if we… film a small POV v-video… like, not a live one! Just a small upload on my channel to test the waters maybe? I just---you don’t have to say anything and--and it’ll be quick, and--and like, nothing major just a little, um, f-fingering and--oh my god, sorry, I shouldn’t have a-asked, that’s just---I’m s-sorry I was thinking about it and it kinda got to me and I’m---I’m kinda already wet just thinking about it and--”

“No, let’s… let’s do it. To be fair, people seem to like risqué public things like that right?” A crimson blush falls on Seungcheol’s cheeks as he turns the tables, wrapping a hand around your wrist as he walks you to the employee restroom. “It’s… there shouldn’t be anyone in here so we should be safe.” He mutters, checking to make sure before he ushers you inside and locks the door behind him.

“I don’t know what to do so you’ll have to guide me a little here, baby.”

You nod, pulling your phone out and opening the camera app. Scrolling, you put it in video mode, clicking the red button before passing it to Seungcheol. “I’ve never done it either but I’m sure I can just… crop it and I m-mean it’s meant to be a little shoddy, right?” You giggle nervously, body already on fire when Seungcheol makes the camera face you. “You don’t have to say anything if you’re not comfortable with your voice being in the video, I just need… this.”

You reach for his free hand, playing with it as you run your fingertips across the veins. “I’m sorry, daddy… I just… I couldn’t help but think about your fingers inside my tight pussy...” Seungcheol almost loses his grip on your phone; palm clammy when he watches as you bring his hand underneath your short dress.

“Please… please, won’t daddy fuck me with his fingers? I promise I’ll be good for the rest of the day if he lets me cum on his fingers…” You whine.

Seungcheol isn’t ready to have his voice heard yet, so he nods, fingers twitching in your hold.

You take this as an okay to continue, dragging his hand up until his knuckles graze your panties. “O-oh, fuck…”

This time Seungcheol takes the lead; his own body ablaze when he can already feel your wetness soaking through your panties. He presses into it, digging his fingers into the wet material until it sticks to you like a second skin. “D-daddy, please, please, put them inside, I need it!!” You mewl, trying to keep your voice down as much as possible while still being audible enough on camera.

He shoots you a look; one that tells you to hike your dress up until your soaking panties are seen through the camera lens. And you easily follow, holding your dress up as Seungcheol drops to his knees, angling the camera upwards until only his fingers and your clothed pussy are in view. You spread your legs a little more, back resting on the wall behind you.

“Please, I can’t wait any longer…”

He gulps once, saying a prayer before he slowly pushes your panties to the side. And you all but lose any semblance of sanity the second he runs his fingertips through your wetness, pussy clenching around emptiness. “Fuck--fuck me, please!”

Once Seungcheol deems his fingers wet enough, his eyes meet yours, asking for silent consent before he makes any further moves. You nod frantically, fingers gripping the material of your dress tightly.

Seungcheol bites his lip the second he starts sinking his first finger into your tight warmth; already feeling the drool pooling in his mouth when you moan loudly. He starts a slow pace, mentally noting just how obscenely wet you are when he drags his finger out slowly. “Ngh, daddy m-more, please, I can take it, I wanna be f-full~” He gives it a few more thrusts of his index finger before he adds his middle finger; this time slowly sinking both digits into your pussy as you whimper above him.

His eyes flit up, mesmerized when he sees your face contort in bliss. “O-oh my god, I’m--I’m already so close… Daddy’s fingers are so much bigger and thicker than mine, it fuh--feels so good…” You mutter; squirming when Seungcheol doesn’t move.

And it takes him a second; too fixated on the way your tight walls only seem to suck his fingers in deeper.

But he starts a moderate pace, scissoring and curling his fingers inside of you until you’re reduced to whines and soft breathy moans.

He can already feel you getting tighter around his fingers after a few more minutes; doubling his pace when you start to beg.

“Oh my god, oh my god, ‘m so close, fuck! P-please touch my clit, daddy, please make m-me c--cum!”

Seungcheol feels his cock throbbing in his pants but he focuses on you, thumb immediately on your clit as he rubs harsh and quick circles on the swollen nub. He doesn’t know how much time has passed or if his break is over, but the look of absolute pleasure on your face is enough to make him not care.

He curls his fingers into your g-spot, holding them still as he continuously rubs your clit until you’re cumming; thighs shaking as you let out shaky breaths above him.

“Oh m-my god, daddy!” You mumble in a hurried frenzy, thighs clamping around his hand between your legs as the pleasure washes over you.

Seungcheol lets you ride out your high, gently wiggling his fingers inside of you as he starts to slow down.

“Mmh… Seungcheol…”

Oh fuck.

He definitely liked it when you moaned his name. 

“Y-yes…?” It’s his cue to turn off the camera, shaky finger pressing the ‘stop’ button. He gently slides his fingers out of you, muttering an apology when you wince.

“You don’t have to say sorry! It’s just… ‘m sensitive…” You mewl, already missing the feeling of his fingers inside of you. “Y-yeah, of course! I, um, I hope that was okay? I’ll give you a second to get cleaned up, I’ll uh, run and get you some water.”

You nod in response, thanking him before he quickly washes off his hands and bolts out of the restroom; ears and cheeks redder than a tomato.

Once you’re alone, you quickly open your camera roll, clicking on the video as you hurriedly crop out the beginning and end, making sure that the short video didn’t have any incriminating details before you open up your camming homepage.

There’s a moment of unsureness that makes you pause. You bite the inside of your cheek, weighing the potential outcomes of posting this to your page. 

But before you can change your mind, you quickly start the upload; adding a title and a short description before you lock your phone to let it process.

In the meantime, you get cleaned up, checking your appearance in the mirror once before picking up your phone again. Unlocking it, you find the upload has finished and you exhale sharply, publishing the video before locking the device again.

You move to exit the restroom, already finding Seungcheol holding a bottle of water on the other side.

“Oh, there you are! Everything okay?”

“Mmhmm! I uploaded the video before I could change my mind so I’m a little nervous…” You trail off, accepting the bottle that Seungcheol passes you.

“Well, the good news is, we’re bailing, now. I told ‘Guk to clock me out so we should get out of here so I can get your mind off of that.”

He shoots you a genuine smile, offering his hand which you take.

“Let’s fuckin’ get some ice cream, I think we deserve it.”

Seungcheol takes you on a scenic drive, taking you to an ice cream shop further away from town.

The two of you sit down in a booth towards the back of the shop and he helps clear your head, talking about various topics to keep your mind off of the huge risk you’d just taken.

“Anyway, that’s one of the reasons why I’m never bar-hopping with ‘Guk again. He’s got no limit, nobody can keep up and nobody wants to keep paying the uber fees.” You laugh as Seungcheol finishes his story, taking a sip of your milkshake.

You can’t help but sigh after a few seconds, pouting at Seungcheol who blinks questioningly at you. “‘Cheollie, I don’t wanna go home…” He stares back, unsure of what to say. A million different thoughts run through his mind in the split second before he opens his mouth.

“Why don’t you stay with me for a couple more days?”

Seungcheol doesn’t understand the gravity of his words until they spill out of his mouth; a panicked look on his face when you go completely silent in the seat across from him. “I m-mean, uh, I mean, like, fuck. I’m sorry, that must’ve been way too out of bounds. I just---it’s just, you don’t want to go home and---and I can take care of you while you’re here! Even if it’s just a couple days. I can help you film too!” He curses himself for rambling; immediately shutting himself up.

“I--I don’t want to bother you, ‘Cheol… That’s really too kind of you…” A shy blush coats your skin; chewing on your bottom lip when you shyly avoid his gaze. “A-and my filming stuff is back home too… I brought a few toys with me so I could film my weekend shows but--but my camera…”

“I can ask Jeongguk!”

You shoot him a bewildered look, brow quirking. “He--he streams sometimes too, like, video games ‘n shit. He actually offered me his extra equipment a while back, if I ever wanted to get into it myself. I can ask to borrow it, if you want?”

You drink in his words, unsure. The thought of staying with Cheol might’ve danced across your mind a handful of times, but now that the offer was on the table, you weren’t sure how to respond.

You trusted Seungcheol, and you knew by now that he would never do anything to hurt or betray you. But this was a far leap from how things were the last time you’d seen him.

“Listen, I can see the cogs in your head turning, baby. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, I’m not forcing your hand into anything you don’t want. But I know you’ve been wanting to get out a ‘lil more and… well, in truth, I think it’d be nice for both of us? I can take care of you while you’re here with me and we can keep each other company.” He pauses, smiling at you from across the booth. “But I can also take you back to your hotel room and let you pack so you don’t get home too late.”

“‘Cheol I trust you.. It’s just that… I’m s-scared…”

“Scared? Of what, baby?”

The warmth blooms inside of you; shy eyes meeting his.

“Scared that I’m not gonna wanna go home…”

Seungcheol takes it easy for the rest of the day and doesn’t make an effort to get an answer out of you. He takes you around the city, tugging you into shops he thinks you’d like and walking around with you aimlessly until the sun goes down.

But time seems to go even faster once he takes you to dinner; a sigh on his lips when he knows he has to bring the topic back up.

“I hate to ask but… I have to take you back to your hotel after this so…” Seungcheol trails off, leaving it open-ended for you.

“I know… I just want to know… Why do you like me so much?”

The question takes Seungcheol by surprise; eyes wide as saucers. “I--I’m sorry I don’t follow?” You chuckle under your breath, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“It’s just… we were strangers, kind of, before Friday, you know what I mean? And now you’re offering your place to me to just… crash at for a few days? What if I rob you blind? Or what--what if you try something with me that I don’t like?” You suddenly start catastrophizing; mind going a mile a minute with potential outcomes.

“Hey, whoa, whoa, wait. Calm down, sweetheart. It’s okay! Breathe!” You let out a shaky exhale, groaning as you hide your face in your palms. “God, ‘Cheol, ‘m sorry, I--I really want to stay with you for a few days. It’s just that my brain is going light speed and I can’t keep up. I really like you too, you’ve been nothing but kind and sweet and you’re so handsome, it’s just so crazy to me...” Your words are slightly muffled but Seungcheol catches it, a soft chuckle on his lips when he leans his head on his palm.

“I’ll sleep on the sofa and leave you alone. You can take the bed. Hell, you can even rob me blind and I’d say thank you.”

He reaches his free hand over, fingers circling your wrist as he pulls your hand down. “And I’m offering you my place because I like you as you. You’re cute and funny, and so fuckin’ humble. And I want to get to know you better. In person, y’know?”

“Y-yeah… I wanna get to know you better too. And it’s only a couple days right?”

“Right.”

Seungcheol drives you back to your hotel, a smile on his face when he sees you in better spirits.

He parks his car in front, turning to face you. “So I’ll just wait here while you grab your things and check out, okay? I’ll contact ‘Guk to see if I can swing by and take that extra equipment he offered.”

This time you nod cheerily, body buzzing with excitement as you hurriedly step out of his car. “I’ll be quick!”

He gives it a moment before he picks his phone up, taking a deep breath before typing out a message to the younger male.

‘Hey, ‘Guk I have a favour. Get back to me asap if u can.’

Jeon 🥴 : bold of u to msg me…

Confusion crosses Seungcheol’s features; fingers hovering over the keyboard. ‘What are you talking about?’

Jeongguk takes a second to send a screenshot, Seungcheol’s cheeks burning a crimson colour when he sees the content.

Jeon 🥴: it’s the employee restroom for me.

Jeon 🥴: bruh it’s also the fuckin way i knew it was u before i even played the video… fuck man is that why u too so long on ur break? u do kno u went over right, I clocked it cuz i was expecting u to come back sooner

Jeon 🥴: for the rec im not mad, actually im impressed just cant believe this is u

Seungcheol ignores Jeongguk’s messages, instead opening the screenshot again and re-reading the video title.

‘I was so needy… 🥺 so I asked daddy to finger me in public…’

Jeon 🥴: bitch i kno ur reading this im dropping the hyung bc u kept this from me!!

Jeon 🥴: after i even offered u my extra camming stuff u were already doing it behind my back…

Seungcheol rolls his eyes at the younger male’s dramatic nature, fingers quickly swiping across the keyboard.

‘Alright, I’m sorry okay? I just didn’t think my online habits needed to be public knowledge and for the record, that was the first time I’ve ever done anything like that. I promise no more secrets, unless absolutely necessary. And also speaking of that extra equipment, can I swing by and grab it from your place?’

Jeon 🥴: r u gonna cam now? u got one sip of the devils juice and now ur all in?

‘Would u stop being dramatic oh my god. It’s not for me, it’s for ‘cherry’. She’s going to be staying with me for a few days and I fully expect you to keep your mouth shut on this.’

Seungcheol grimaces when he calls you by your online handle; already feeling unfamiliar with it.

Jeon 🥴: o i c. sure, u can come pick it up, simp. I’ll make sure she’s got all the necessary things before u get here and u owe me one!! i fully expect u to come stream with me at least once for keeping ur secrets 

‘It’s a deal. I’ll be there in an hour and a half.’

A sigh escapes Seungcheol’s lips, his eyes dancing over to your figure that skips towards the car. He locks his phone just as you tap on the glass, popping the trunk before he steps out.

“How’d it go? All checked out?”

“Mmhmm! Did you get in contact with Jeongguk? What’d he say?”

A nervous laugh spills from his lips as he puts your small luggage in the trunk, slamming it shut before rounding the car to open your door. “I’ll help you get settled in at my place and then I’ll drive over really quick and grab the stuff from his place.”

You hop in his car, fiddling with the seatbelt until Seungcheol slides into the driver’s seat.

“He didn’t ask what you needed it for?” Gulp. Shit.

“I just told him that I was thinking about streaming, for--for gaming stuff. He was okay with it.”

He’d tell you the truth. Soon, he promises.

No. Now.

Seungcheol sighs, hands on the wheel as he stares straight ahead. “No, no, I--I can’t sit here and lie to you. Jeongguk knows you. I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you earlier, I told him to keep his mouth shut because I didn’t want him to bother you while we were at the roller rink.”

“I--oh…”

He can only nod; eyes dancing over to you as you play with the hem of your dress. “Yeah, I--I’m really sorry. He--He also found out I was ‘dom.cheol’ too and, fuck, I--I don’t know, I kind of panicked too. I hid that part of me from everyone I know so it was just… it was a lot.”

You meet his sad eyes, shooting him a small smile of your own. “It’s okay! It’s a little funny that happens right after that ‘kitty_junjun’ says he saw me in person too, huh? I mean, thanks for trying to protect me at least. It must’ve been weird for you too.”

“Yeah… If you’re not comfortable anymore, I… I’d understand too.” Seungcheol prepares himself for the worst, knowing that there was a chance that this was goodbye.

“Are you kidding! What’s one person gonna do? And you said he’s your best friend and you trust him… I’ll have to take a leap of faith on that one but… I trust you.”

You lean over the center console, kissing him on the cheek. “And anyway, as long as he’s not one of those weirdos asking for ‘favours’, I think we’re in the clear, right?”

Seungcheol grimaces; as long as it’s from me and not you, he thinks.

#cherrybomb!cheol #seungcheol smut #scoups smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #scoups scenarios #scoups imagines #seungcheol imagines #seungcheol scenarios #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #svt scenarios #scoups #seungcheol

[pradaksj]

ghostin || part one. (m.)

all rights reserved © pradaksj

↳do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

❧ summary ⟶  ❝Though I wish he were here instead. Don't want that living in your head, he just comes to visit me when I'm dreaming every now and then. ❞

❧ pairing⟶ seokjin/reader

❧ genre⟶  angst, angst, and angst … did i say angst? + a bit of fluff? friends to lovers. 

❧ word count ⟶ 20,000+ 

❧ warnings ⟶ major character death! sad ending. descriptions of grieving process. 

❧ a/n ⟶ this is based on both ghostin by ariana grande and the one that got away by katy perry and pluto projector by rex orange county which has a godlike violin instrumental that is a perfect fit for this story. i def recommend listening to the slowed + reverb versions. + i tried to make transitions as clear as possible so please let me know how i did on those :(  and lastly ermmm dont stress too much on specific time stamps and ages bc ermmm I just did quick maths for a lot of it LMAO

❧ part of the  ⟶ thank u, next series

part 1 || part 2 (final) 

2050.

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear grandma, happy birthday to you!” the sound of multiple claps echo across the room, symbolizing the start of a new year for you. 

Today was your 75th birthday celebration and around you were your two grandkids along with your only daughter. It seemed as the years went by, the need for such grand celebrations weren’t as important as they used to be. A simple cutting of the cake surrounded by the people you love being enough to suffice.

“Grandma! You have to blow the candles out!” your youngest grandson eagerly reminds you, ready to blow them out himself if you didn’t take action soon, “and don’t forget to make a wish and don’t tell us or else it won’t come true!”

“Mm,” you smile warmly, gently closing your eyes and puffing a gentle huff of air, your mind blank of any wishes, for you had stopped believing in the magic of wishes a long long time ago.

“Alright, now to cut it … Jia go grab a cutting knife from the block set,” you hear your daughter command your oldest grandchild, who at this moment was clearly too consumed with whatever she had going on in her phone to even bother listening, “Jia!” she finally snaps her head up at the sound of her mother’s voice raising an octave, “How many times do I have to tell you to stop using that phone so much, not only is it rude but we’re celebrating your grandma’s birthday. The least you can do is have the courtesy to turn off your phone.”

She rolls her eyes in response, “Mom, I’m sure grandma doesn’t mind … right grandma?” she flashes you the toothy grin that you were used to seeing whenever she wanted something, knowing she’s always had a special place in your heart as the first grandchild.  

All you can do is chuckle softly, feeling too old to entertain and be dragged into the bickering arguments between your daughter and granddaughter. Carefully you get up yourself and grab a cutting knife despite your daughter’s pleas to sit.

“Look at what you’ve made your grandma do Ji—” but before your daughter could continue with her scolding, you raise a hand as a gesture of interrupting.

“I’m old, but I’m not that old Yeojin, getting up to grab a knife isn’t the end of the world for me,” you sigh, “Now let’s stop with all of the bickering and eat some cake.”

It was odd really, growing up you could never exactly picture yourself getting to this age (not that you weren’t ever hoping to), but like any other person you just always pictured yourself being young forever. 

It wasn’t until your first gray hair appeared several years ago that it suddenly struck you that you really were actually aging. From there the wrinkles upon your skin grew to be more prevalent and things you had no problem doing when you were in your teenage years began to consume much more energy from you. 

And now that you observed yourself in the mirror, here on your 75th birthday, did you realize that life had really gone by in the blink of an eye. 

Of course 75 wasn’t too old of an age, but now retired and living under the light supervision of your nearly 50 year old daughter, you had long ago realized that the days of wild adventures and endless partying were long over. In a way it was time to start asking yourself if you had lived a life you could be proud of and if you fulfilled the promise you made over 50 years ago. 

Honestly, you were unsure, but before you could dwell on your thoughts for any longer, the sound of an argument going on downstairs catches your attention.

“Hand me the phone Jia!” you hear your daughter’s voice yell across the room as you made your way into the living room.

“I said no! I’m not twelve anymore, you can’t just make me hand you my things whenever you want,” Jia scoffs in return, adamant on her rebellious stance.

“Considering that I’m the one whose paying that phone bill every month, I wouldn’t exactly call it yours little lady,” Yeojin sternly furrows her brows while her hand continued to remain held out, her patience running on a thin line, “Jia if you don’t give me that phone then—”

“What?” she interrupts, challenging whatever her mother was going to say. With your newly profound headache growing by the second, you grab the keys to your small old Toyota, deciding that you weren’t going to be helping handle this on your birthday. 

Their voices, which became nothing more than background noise while you grabbed your winter jacket, were brought back to your attention once you were making your way out the door.

“Mom where are you going?” Yeojin asks before you could run off, “It’s raining and you shouldn’t be driving at this hour of night.”

“And why is that?”

“Because Grandma you’re—” Jia suddenly chimes in, “well you’re um—” old, is what you know your granddaughter wants to say, but out of respect chooses not to.  

You sigh, “I’m just going to the diner to grab myself a late night snack while you two continue with your useless arguing. Hopefully when I come back, you two will have realized how pointless these arguments are.”

“Mom—” Yeojin begins, but almost as if a lightbulb went off in her head, she suddenly grabs Jia’s phone while she was distracted in watching you leave, “Go with your grandma,” she commands, and Jia’s eyes immediately go wide.

“Hey you can’t just—” Jia’s about to complain until she sees the firm look on her mother’s face, “But—” she glances in your direction, knowing that just like her mom, she wouldn’t feel too good having you out driving this late at night, especially on a rainy day.

“You cried about getting your permit for months, now is the time to put it to use,” Yeojin sends her knowing look, recalling the number of months that Jia would complain about all of her classmates getting either their permits or license’s while she was still stuck taking the bus. 

“Ugh,” she groans, “Fine, grandma wait for me in the car,” she ultimately says. After putting on her shoes, Jia begins to make her way out to the car, but not before her mother stops her midway to tell her to “Drive safe.”

“Mom, I know,” she scoffs, “but don’t expect me to spend hours there or something. We’re strictly going for whatever food she wants and back. No way in hell are we dining in.”  

To that, Yeojin laughs. There was no way her mother wouldn’t want to dine in, but deciding she’d let Jia figure that out on her own, instead she says, “Well as long as you listen to whatever your grandma has to say to you then I don’t mind what time you come back.”

“That’s if she doesn’t put me to sleep first,” Jia mumbles to herself, but still loud enough for her mother to hear. 

One could say, she wasn’t exactly looking forward to spending one on one time with her grandma, not without her phone at least. Of course that didn’t mean she didn’t love her grandma to death because truly she did, but often she found herself halfway asleep whenever she had long conversations with her. The same old endearing “you and your mother need to learn to communicate” or the “back in my day” conversations were quite repetitive.

“Mm, you need to start putting that attitude of yours under control little lady,” Yeojin shakes her head in disapproval, “I understand that your grandma can be a bit…”

“Boring,” Jia completes the sentence for her.

“Tedious,” Yeojin corrects, “at times, but occasionally she has an interesting story to tell here and there,” she chuckles, “so don’t count her out just yet. You may be surprised with whatever story she has prepared to tell.”

And with that all Jia could do was sigh, preparing for the long night ahead.

“Grandma, we’ve been here for like 2 hours now,” Jia complains, staring at you as you ate your BLT sandwich, the sound of both loud and pleased munches coming out of your mouth, “You’re really telling me you’re not full yet?”

With a mouthful of food in your mouth, you shake your head no. It isn’t until you gulp down your food that you’re able to verbally give a response, “You know I’m a slow eater, plus it’s my birthday. You don’t hear me complain on your birthday, do you?”

To that, Jia remained silent. She guessed you had a point, not like there was much left for an elderly lady like you to do. The least she could do was suck up her complaints, and deal with it. It just sucked that whenever she looked up at the wall clock it seemed like time was moving as slow as a snail. 

God, how she should’ve somehow managed to take back her phone. It also didn’t help that those “stories” her mom had mentioned weren’t planning on making an appearance tonight because all you did was silently eat your food and stare out the window. 

Honestly, Jia hadn’t expected much but it seemed as if today you were even quieter than usual, not even bothering to make the small conversation you usually did, like asking her how school was going or if she had a boyfriend yet (not that she ever responded truthfully). So in short, you were doing absolutely nothing to appease Jia’s boredom.

All Jia could do was tap her nails against the old diner’s table and observe the other late night foodies around you two. 

The first person she noticed was a middle aged man who was eating a burger along with a strawberry shake. Based on his tiresome appearance and the hat he wore, she could only assume that he was most likely a trucker who needed to make a pit stop.

The second person she noticed was not a single person, but a group of three. A father, a mother, and their little daughter. The sight of them tugging slightly at her heart strings, reminding her of a time in her childhood before her parents’ divorce. If only she had appreciated those moments a little more while they were happening.

Deciding that she wasn’t in the mood for nostalgic sulking, she instead focused her attention on the last set of people in the diner. A couple, who was only a couple of feet away from you two, seated in one of the booths rather than at a table like Jia and you. 

The young man, who Jia assumed was in his mid 20′s, was seated with a woman who was just as good looking as him. The two of them sat facing across from one another rather than besides each other, the serious look on their faces clearly signaling that whatever they were talking about was of importance.

It wasn’t until she took a clearer look at the woman that she realized she was crying, the sounds of her whimpers becoming clearer once she had taken note of the woman’s disheveled appearance. It looked like she had been crying for hours, her hand holding onto the man’s at the center of the table as if begging him to stay…

“Yejin we just can’t be together anymore,” Jia overhears the man say, and it’s only then that she realizes that the woman is begging him to stay.  

“Jimin, all I’m asking is why?” she hears the woman plead, her voice sounding weak and defeated, “I just— I just don’t understand—” she manages to stutter the sentence out, “Does it have to do with what you were telling me the other night? About feeling incompenent with your career?”

He vigorously shakes his head no, prepared to deny the accusation, “No—”

But she’s quick to cut him off, “Because if it is,” she squeezes his hand tighter, “I already told you I don’t care. I don’t care if you’re the poorest or richest man on the planet, okay? As long as I’m with you, I just don’t care,” she repeats, “You’re my person Jimin,” the woman, who Jia now identified as Yejin, with whatever energy she had left, forced a small smile to grace upon her lips. 

A small smile that spoke nothing but genuine love for the man across from her, but with eyes that were desperately hoping for a small sign that the man in front of her would break, “You’re all I have.”

The man, Jimin, instead of reciprocating the warm gesture, pulls his hands away, forcing himself to be the ultimate bad guy in this story. 

This was for the best he reasoned with himself, not for him, but for her. 

The woman in front of him who he loved so much that he couldn’t bear the thought of denying her a future where she’d have to worry everyday about what their future held, even if it meant not being with him, 

“It’s for that reason that we can’t….” he clears his throat, “After tonight we’ll be nothing more than strangers.” he says in a voice that hid any feeling of despair he felt, saving the emotion for later when he was by himself.

“Please,” her voice breaks, “Jimin please,” a single teardrop falls from her eye, “Our future, it'll be worth it, I promise. Every stupid stubborn inch of it because as long as I’m by your side we’ll get through anything. And when we’re old and gray we’ll laugh about this stupid conversation—”

“Yejin—”

“No,” Yejin shakes her head vigorously, desperately fighting tooth and nail for her boyfriend of 7 years and her childhood friend of even more, the person she thought she’d been through it all with, “I refuse to—”

“Yejin!” he firmly interrupts her before she could continue, unsure of just how much more he could hear, “Look at me.” Fuck Yejin. Don’t do this to me. Just accept it., was all he could think at the moment, “I’m—” for a second he struggles to say the words, struggles to officially shatter the heart that had trusted him enough to show itself completely bare, “I’m doing this for me. I’m choosing me. And I don’t know what else I can say or do for you to realize that,” how disgusting it felt to spew the lies out of his mouth.

And it was once he said those words, that Yejin no longer fought against what was happening. It was then that Jimin knew, she had finally accepted it. 

The two sat there in silence for what felt like an eternity, until Yejin grabbed her keys from the table, mustering the courage to be the first one to leave, but not before planting a soft kiss on top of Jimin’s head, a final gesture of good bye.

Jia, who’d witness the whole heartbreaking scene play out in front of her, struggled to tear her eyes away. But it was once she did, that she had noticed she wasn’t the only one who had paid attention to the break up.

Watching the couple, you looked as if you’d seen a ghost, truly at a loss for words. Never did you imagine you’d witness history repeat itself.

A voice breaks you away from your thoughts, “Grandma, are you okay?” Jia warily asks, concerned with why you looked so shocked.

“Oh,” you blink rapidly as if being brought back to reality, “Yeah, it’s just—” you glance at the booth once again, watching the man sulk in his seat. 

His head was leaned against the glass window, dazedly looking at the view outside. By now his eyes were puffy, the emotions he had kept bottled in, now manifesting itself in the salty tears that were now silently falling down his face. 

And before you could think twice, you grabbed the extra sandwich you had ordered and began to walk towards his booth, Jia following behind with a shocked expression.

“Grandma, what are you doing?!” she asks in a panicky tone, but before she could stop you from doing anything, you were already standing beside the booth the man was in. 

The dirty-blonde haired man turns his attention towards the two of you, a worn out expression on his face.

“You seem like you could use this,” you offer him the sandwich with a warm smile on your face, “a young man like you shouldn’t be in such distress, or else you’ll end up with wrinkles like mine,” you try to joke around, an attempt to brighten the mood. 

He lets out a forced chuckle, showing you that despite his down mood, he was still a very polite young man through and through.

“You don’t mind if we…” you stare at the seat across from him, signaling that you were hoping to sit. 

He looks as if he wants to say no, shyly avoiding eye contact for a moment, unsure of how to reject a kind old woman.

“Oh it’s just that um—” but before he could spew out an excuse, you were already making yourself comfortable in the booth, your granddaughter hesitantly sitting in the spot next to him, still giving you the “What are you doing” eyes. 

He feigns an awkward smile, scolding himself for being so timid. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate the kind gesture, for any other day he would’ve been more than happy to receive a free BLT sandwich and make conversation with an elder, but tonight … well tonight he just wanted to sulk in his own misery.

“So what is a young man like you doing out here so late at night?” you ask, the closed eye smile on your face causing your wrinkles to protrude. 

He remains silent, unsure of what to respond with, “Was that your girlfriend just now who left?” you boldly ask, the phrase “having a filter” clearly not in your dictionary.

“Grandma!” Jia frantically says, “Sir I’m sorry, we’ll leave now,” she forces an awkward laugh, now getting up from the booth, “she can be a bit pushy—”

“She’s my ex now,” he surprisingly answers, catching not only Jia but himself off guard. 

You on the other hand remain with a warm sympathetic smile on your face. 

Honestly, he wasn’t sure what came over him to be so straightforward. He’d been holding so much in for so long, he figured that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to talk to a random old lady and her granddaughter for a night. Not like he’d ever see them again, right?

Letting out a bitter scoff directed at himself, he continues, “I broke up with her just now Mrs—”

“Ms. y/l/n,” you correct him, “and this is my granddaughter Jia,” you signal to Jia to sit back down, and she watches the two of you with wary eyes, confused by the sudden conversational exchange between the two of you. 

Hmm, well she did want to know why he broke up with his girlfriend, so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to just sit and listen for a bit. Shaking his hand, she seats herself once more.

“You don’t seem too happy about your break up, for someone who did the breaking that is…” you lightheartedly comment, secretly analyzing his tense posture. Though relaxing just a bit, it was clear that he still didn’t feel completely comfortable sharing the details of his private life. It wasn’t surprising really, you were nothing more than a stranger. It wasn’t like you expected him to be so open, not right away at least, “you don’t mind me asking why?”

“Because—” he pauses for a moment, trying to find the right words, “we—” he sighs, holding back, “we just weren’t meant to be,” he ultimately says with a small sad smile on his face. 

You stare at him for what feels like an eternity, a frown now on your face.

“And what makes you say that?” you ask. 

He gulps, the intense stare from both you and Jia now making him nervous, “Because she’s destined for greatness,” he longingly states, “and I was nothing more than an obstacle along the way even if she didn’t realize it,” he looks down at the table, “Because all I want in this world is for her to live a long happy life, a life where she can do anything she pleases whenever she wants, without a worry in the world,” he concludes, now sporting a dull expression.

“You—” you clench your teeth, almost looking at him in disgust, “You stupid boy,” you harshly mumble, but still loud enough for both him and Jia to hear.

“Grandma!” Jia’s eyes widen, taken aback by your sudden rude remark, but all you can do is continue to stare at the man in front of you, a pained expression on your face. Almost as if you wanted to cry.

Jimin on the other hand didn’t know what to make of your words. Was he offended? No, not really. Surprised? Couldn’t say he was. Was it deserved? He’d like to think so. “Look—” he’s about to say something until you interrupt him.

“What about you?” you demand pointedly, “Don’t you care about what you want? What about your happiness?” you feel your upper lip tremble along with a rush of emotions that you were sure you hadn’t felt in years. 

Anger. Sadness. Fear. 

Everything you had kept bottled in for so long was beginning to make its appearance all because you witnessed this young man break up with his girlfriend.

“Grandma I think we should g—”

“No,” you firmly state, your voice slightly trembling, “I’m not going to let it happen again, I can’t,” a single tear falls from your face as you come into eye contact with the young man. God, he looked so much like him. 

Wiping the tear away, you quickly compose yourself, “I’m going to tell the two of you a story,” you point towards the boy, “and you better listen good and well,” you turn to your granddaughter, “you too little lady because it’s a lesson that can be learned by anyone.”

Her face twists to one of skepticism, but she silently nods her head, deciding she wasn’t going to push your buttons for she had never seen you act like this before. Jimin does the same as well, now fearing getting on your wrong side.

“Good,” you let out a deep breath of air, unsure of where to start. 

This was the first time in your life that you were telling someone absolutely everything, and never had you imagined it’d be in this exact diner with some random stranger (who you’d just happen to be a first hand witness of his breakup) and your granddaughter. 

But a part of you couldn’t help but think that maybe …just maybe it was meant to be this way. That coming to this diner and witnessing what you’d just seen was the universe’s way of telling you that just because your fate was already sealed, didn’t mean you couldn’t change someone else’s. And so you continue, “So I guess…” you pause, “I guess we should start at the beginning.”

“It was the year 1992, Nirvana had just released their all too famous album ‘Nevermind’ months prior to the new year, marking the first shift that we’d see in pop culture during the 90’s. People my age were beginning to slowly throw away their mousse bottles and bright colored outfits and opting in for a more toned down look of mom-jeans and oversized band shirts.

I had just turned 17 at the time and moved here to the city of Gwacheon because of my dad’s job. You wouldn’t believe me but back then this city we know now was a snooze fest. It was nothing but government official buildings and a vacant town center that played outdated music. 

I remember being so bitter about moving because like any other teen who moved from one city to another, I had just barely begun to make friends in the city before, only to find out I’d have to leave months later.

I remember having a childish frown on my face the whole ride to the new neighborhood, convinced that by having a fit I’d somehow have my way and go back to the city before, but all in all that’s where the story begins…”

“Mom it’s just not fair!” you complain, crossing your arms while leaning your head against the window, watching as the new town you’d have to learn to call home was nearing with every stop, “I was just beginning to get used to that school, I was even supposed to go on a date!”

Sighing, your mom turns from the passenger's seat to face you, a mix of sympathy and annoyance on her face. It’d been over 4 hours already of hearing you complain in the car, and though your dad had learned to mute you out from the driver’s seat, your mom had to endure each and every complaint. 

“Y/N you know your dad’s job requires him to move around from time to time, it’s something out of our control, unless you’re magically going to find him a job out there that pays him as much as his current one then be my guest,” she stares at you knowingly, while you stay silent. 

She furrows her brows once she notices something about your appearance, “And what did I tell you about lining your lips like that? And that thing around your neck you’re wearing, you’re lucky it hasn’t suffocat—”

“It’s called a choker and everyone my age wears them mom,” you roll your eyes, wanting this conversation to be over now, despite it being you who started it, “times are changing meaning fashion is too.”

“I thought you kids liked the whole poofy hair and leg warmers kind of stuff. And that one man who's always on MTV,” she twiddles her fingers, trying to remember his name, “you know the one who danced as a zombie in that one video, how does it go again—” she begins to snap her fingers, humming the tune, “cause this is Thriller,” she sings.

“Michael Jackson mom, Michael Jackson,” you answer in annoyance, how the hell did she not know his name?

“Ahh that’s his name,” she laughs, “I’m sorry I’m not so invested in that kind of stuff like you young people are.”

You roll your eyes at this, “Mom I’m sure even grandma knows who Michael Jackson is, you’re just—” but before you could go on any further, the car suddenly comes to a halt.

“And here we are,” your dad finally speaks, an exhausted sigh coming out of his mouth. 

The moving truck, which was following right behind you guys had made its stop as well and while your parents immediately stepped out the car to begin attending to the family things, you just looked at your new home in a mix of dismay and surprise. It was definitely a nice home, it’s resemblance to the houses around you being a bit uncanny.

Suddenly, interrupting your deep thinking, your car door opens. 

Your mom, who for some reason had a complete 180 turn in attitude, now had an impatient look on her face along with an eyebrow raised. “You’re either going to help your dad take out our things or you’re coming with me to introduce ourselves to the neighbors.”

You stare at her for a moment, thinking to yourself which one you wanted to do. Though still slightly pissed off at your dad for his sudden bomb drop of news that you were all moving, you weren’t exactly in the mood to be social right now, let alone with your new neighbors as it would just ultimately mean having to accept the reality of your situation. “I think I’ll just—”

“Come with me? Great,” your mom answers for you, and you only groan in irritation. You couldn’t say you were shocked as this was only expected from her.

Getting out of the car, you begin to follow her to the next door neighbor’s house on the left side of your new home, your mom having come to the conclusion that the neighbors on the right side must’ve not been home due to the lack of cars in the driveway, “And remember y/n, be nice,” she reminds you, noticing the family SUV parked outside the house, she adds, “and who knows maybe there’s someone your age you can make friends with here.”

You stay silent, not sure if whether finding someone your age living inside the house would be a good or bad thing. 

At your last house, there was a girl your exact same age who despite being a very kind person, was just a little too talkative. You’d often randomly find her in your room after learning that your mom let her in because she thought that “that’s what teen girls like to do right? Gossip and cut up some magazines in their room.” Not only would you find yourself getting migraines all the time but you were just too nice to kick her out.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The muffled sound of what you could only assume were kids running around and things being thrown made you mumble “Oh great,” to yourself. If your mom got friendly with the neighbors like she somehow always did, you’d find yourself babysitting these kids sometime in the future for free. 

Minutes pass and nothing. 

Personally you took that as a sign of ‘do not disturb’ but your mom, being the relentless person she was, knocked one more time.

“Mom clearly they don’t want to—” and of course just as you were about to convince her to leave, the sound of the kids screaming and laughing comes to a sudden halt and the door swings wide open. 

There in front of you stood a middle-aged woman, probably near your mom’s age, who had her hair completely disheveled and one of her kids (a little girl) in her arms while the other (a little boy) gripping onto her right leg like a sloth holding onto a branch.

Despite her stressed appearance, there was still a sense of motherly tidiness to her. “Hello,” your mom greets with a grin on her face, “we just came to introduce ourselves as your new next door neighbors,” she sticks her hand out for the woman to shake, “I’m y/m/n.”

The woman, who looks a bit confused at first, suddenly snaps back to reality with a “Ohh” expression on her face remembering that the house aside from her having its “For Sale” sign removed not too long ago. 

She’s quick to shake your mom’s hand in return, “Kim Yerin,” she smiles, “and these are my twins, Minjun and Yeonha. Say hi you two,” she nudges the little girl in her arms who currently had her head rested on her mother’s shoulder while doing the same to the boy wrapped around her leg.

The two, clearly shy in front of strangers, only stare at the two of you with curious eyes, “And this must be your daughter I assume,” the woman faces her attention towards you, who had just been quietly watching the exchange, and waits for you to introduce yourself.

Your face slightly reddens when you feel your mother nudge you, “Y/N,” your introduction comes out as more of a whisper.

“And how old are you?” she curiously asks.

“Just turned seventeen,” you answer, an awkward smile forming on your face.

And as if a lightbulb suddenly went off on her head, a huge grin appears on her face, “You’re my older sons age,” she chuckles, “I don’t know if he’s come back home yet,” she mumbles looking behind her and your nerves begin to rise as you know what she’s about to do, “Seokjin!” she yells loud enough that her voice echoes across the walls of her home, “Give me a moment,” she flashes you two a smile before slightly closing the door, placing her foot in the ridge in order to create a crack so that it wouldn’t be completely closed. “Seokjin!” she calls for her son again, and soon you hear the sound of feet scuffling down the stairs.

“You and that camcorder, we have guests,” you hear her say.

“Say hiiii,” a voice behind the door says and you soon hear the kids giggle. 

Yerin opens the door all the way once again, and to your surprise you come to face a tall boy with a camcorder blocking most of his face. 

With the lens facing your direction, a whispered “Woah,” then comes out of his mouth. The sound of the lens zooming in causing your eyebrows to furrow in confusion.

“Seokjin,” his mother says more harshly, making him set the camera down and finally reveal his face. And once he did… wow were you surprised. 

Though he was sporting what you considered an outdated mullet, the boy was relatively handsome. Currently dressed in a simple black fitted long sleeve shirt and cuffed blue jeans, the young man stuck his hand out for you to shake, a small smile gracing his lips.

“Seokjin but you can call me Jin for short,” he politely introduces himself.

Awkwardly avoiding eye contact, you return the shake, “Y/N.”

“Seokjin, I was just telling y/n here that you two are the same age, maybe you could show her around school this Monday,” she suggests, and your mom is quick to chime in.

“Maybe he can show her around town right now, I’m sure she’d love that, wouldn’t you y/n? That’s if he can of course,” she adds and your eyes widen at the suggestion. Soon it becomes apparent that both you and Jin are feeling flustered at both your mothers’ intrusiveness.

“I d-d—” you stutter.

“Mom…” he begins, his ears reddening. Unbeknownst to you, you’d soon find out that it was something that only occurred whenever he was nervous.

“I’ll even lend you the car this one time,” his mother says, grabbing the keys from the key rack next to door and handing them to him.

A silence momentarily fills the air, awkwardness seeping deep until Mrs. Kim breaks it, “Well go you two! me and Mrs….”

“Y/L/N,” your mom completes for her.

“Will be here drinking tea inside and waiting for you to return,” she gently pushes Jin, who had just put on his Converse, out the door while your mom begins to make her way inside, “And remember to drive safe Seokjin,” she says for a final time before practically slamming the door shut.

The two of you stand there for what feels like forever, staring at anything but each other’s eyes. 

“Sorry about that, my mom can be a bit… pushy,” he says, and you want to tell him that it's fine, that your mom is exactly the same, but the words can’t seem to come out. “So…” he mumbles, barely audible to the ear, “Where should we go first?” he asks fiddling with keys in his hands, which only causes you to look at him in confusion. Did he forget you weren’t from here?

“Um…” you say, and slowly he fits the puzzle pieces and realizes what exactly he had asked.

“Oh right,” he awkwardly laughs, scratching the back of his neck as a nervous gesture. 

You notice that he’s still holding his camcorder with the other hand, its small red button still glowing, and so out of nowhere you voice the first question that came to your mind.

“Is that thing still recording?” you ask which averts his attention to the grey bulky object in his hand.

“Oh I must’ve forgot to turn it off,” he says, genuinely surprised at his lousy mistake, “My bad,” he adds and you shake your head in a way to say that it was fine. “So … are you hungry?” he kindly asks, and you think to yourself for a moment … the two of you had to go somewhere as it wasn’t like you could just walk right back in and lie.

Gently, you shrug your shoulders, “Yeah I can go for something to eat,” you say, which by now was the longest sentence he’d heard you speak since your introduction to him.

“Great,” he smiles, making his way towards the Hyundai SUV with you following close behind. To your surprise he walks over to your side and opens the door “like a gentleman” before entering the car himself. You mumble a quiet “thank you,” in return.

It’s once he turns on the ignition that you begin to dread the awkwardness inside the car. It wasn’t that you weren’t a social person because truly you were, or at least you always tried to be. You were just never good at initiating conversations first because honestly, who was? The image of your mom immediately came to your mind, but she was different. That lady could spark a conversation with a plant if she really wanted to.

“And here’s the number one song in the country for a third week straight, Emotions by Mariah Carey!” the radio host announces and soon the famous tune begins to play causing Jin to tap his finger against the driving wheel, clearly a fan of the song. 

You on the other hand kept your attention on the view outside, noting how boring this town was. From the dull buildings to the empty streets, everything was just so boring. But you couldn’t complain too much, for in a couple of months from now you’d be well off on your way to a college in the city of Seoul, which even though it wasn’t too far from here, it was still much more populated.

“So y/n,” Jin lowers the music down, “where did you move from?” he asks, an attempt at making conversation while driving.

“Buk district in Busan,” you answer in a short and precise manner.

“Oh…” he simply says, “Did you like it over there?”

The delivery of the question causes you to quietly chuckle to yourself, “Yeah I did,” you smile to yourself remembering the friends you had made over there, but almost immediately you remember that any chance of ever seeing them again was long gone, and a frown soon replaces the small smile.

Jin notices the change in facial expression from you, “Well I’m sure you’ll like it around here,” he attempts to comfort you, “I know things may look a little different, hell maybe even a little boring,” he laughs, “but trust me you’ll learn to love this place,” he flashes you a reassuring smile.

To that you could only feign a look of happiness. Not wanting to be a complete asshole, you try and think of something you could ask him, something to spark a conversation like he was trying to. 

“It’s Jin right… “ you ask, and to that he nods, “um…” you hum, “how old are your siblings?” you stifly ask, adding an extra comment at the end, “I heard them being pretty um … hyper…  before my mom knocked.”

Immediately a smile appears on his face, “Ahh Minjun and Yeonha,” he chuckles, “they’re four but turning five in a couple of months. They’re a handful,” he jokes around, “but we wouldn’t have it any other way,” he says, referring to him and the rest of his family.

“And they’re your only siblings?” 

He nods, shrugging while answering, “Yeah, but I always wanted siblings growing up and so to not only get one but two at the same time was pretty cool,” he glances at you, “what about you?”

You nod your head no, “My mom told me that once she had me and dealt with all the sleepless nights due to me crying all the time, that she knew one was enough,” you manage to joke around, the atmosphere in the car now becoming less tense.

“I think my parents thought the same way, but surprises happen,” he laughs, “I mean it’s probably a good thing that I was pretty old when they were born. It meant an extra set of hands to help around the house especially considering my dad’s always working.” 

And at the mention of his father you couldn’t help but grow a little curious. He was the only person you hadn’t been introduced to and despite Jin’s mother being an overall gorgeous woman, you assumed that Jin must’ve gotten his most prominent features from his dad as his mother didn’t really resemble him.

“What does he work in?” you continue the flow of the conversation.

“He’s a finance manager for one of the many corporation companies you’ll find around here,” and to that he frowns, “I’m assuming your dad must work in a similar field.”

You look at the window again, “Yeah,” you sigh, “so I guess a lot of people around here work in the business field.” 

“I think that’s what causes this place to be a little boring sometimes,” he comments, focusing on the road in front of him, “The lack of creativity,” and by looking at the buildings and overall aura of the town, you understand what he means, “People here already have expectations set on them, and with the pressure of being successful, no one ever really takes the risk of pursuing what they’re really passionate about.”

“Hm,” you hum, unsure of what to add to that, for Jin had hit the nail on its head.

“Butttttt,” he sings, “when you meet people like me you’ll realize not everyone around here is the same,” and with that he piques your curiosity, the car suddenly coming to a halt.

Looking out the window, you notice you’re in front of an old school diner, it’s neon lights currently turned off because of the daylight. Not that it really mattered, as the bright cherry red and blue color painted walls were definitely enough to grab anyone’s attention. 

Through the see through glass you notice a group of guys sitting at one of the booths, staring at the two of you as you both exited the car. A mixture of both excitement (which you assumed was directed at Jin) and confusion (which was probably directed on you) on their faces.

“Come on, follow me,” Jin says, leading you inside to the group of boys who looked around your age. 

They’re quick to greet Jin, practically shouting his name across the diner. It must’ve been a regular occurrence because none of the waiters even turned to focus their attention on them, “Somehow I knew you guys would be here,” Jin teases.

One of the boys rolls their eyes, “So are you going to introduce us to your new lady friend?” he smiles, and immediately the spotlight is set on you, both you and Jin standing in front of their booth.

“Y/N this is Yoongi,” Jin points at the boy who asked the daring question, “This is Taehyung,” he points at the boy next to him, “and finally this is Namjoon,” he points at the final boy across from them, “You guys this is y/n. She just moved here from Busan.”

“Ahh Busan!” the black haired boy, Taehyung, says excitedly, “I once had a pen pal from there,” he trivially says causing the other boys to laugh.

“Ahh Taehyung and his pen pals,” Yoongi shakes his head, tapping the boys shoulders, “And how did that one out of the many turn out?” he asks in a joking manner, only causing Taehyung to pout, knowing Yoongi was teasing him.

“Hmm,” he groaned, “It’s only been a couple of months without a reply, that doesn’t mean we’re not friends anymore!”

“Yeah Yeah Yeah,” Yoongi rolls his eyes again, scooting to the side to make space for you, “Well don’t just stand there, sit,” he lightly teases, and you glance at Jin as if to confirm if it was okay to do so. He smiles at your shyness, confident that you’d get along with his friends just fine, it’d just take some warming up on your part until then. 

Setting his camcorder down on the table, he takes a seat next to Namjoon while you take yours next to Yoongi and Taehyung.

“So y/n,” Namjoon speaks up, “how are you liking it here so far?” But before you can think of a response, Jin answers for you.

“She literally just moved here,” he glances at the clock on the wall, “like an hour ago,” he laughs, “I don’t even think she’s unpacked her stuff.”

“Well don’t expect too much,” Yoongi says, contradicting what Jin had told you earlier, “this place is a snooze fest!” he dramatically adds, only causing Jin to nudge him with his leg from under the table, “Hey it's true, if it weren’t for you guys I’d be dying of boredom all the time.”

“Which is exactly why we need to show y/n the best spots in town to visit and how to have some fun,” Jin declares and to that, the boys shrug, not minding the new addition to their group.

“Well wasn’t that easy,” you think to yourself, it seemed making friends wasn’t as hard as you thought it would be.

“As long as you’re not some kind of party pooper then—”

“Like there's parties in town to even poop at,” Taehyung interrupts causing Yoongi to look at him with a “Huh?” expression making everyone including yourself laugh out loud.

“You do realize it’s not literal—” but before he could continue, Yoongi raises his hand to cover his face, “You and that camera Jin,” and immediately you follow suit, having failed to notice that Jin had turned on his camcorder. Taehyung instead of covering his face, poses by flashing two peace signs, while Namjoon flashed his dimpled smile once the camera was pointed to him.

“Ahh why do you feel the need to record everything?” Yoongi asks, still covering his face.

“You’ll thank me later,” Jin says, “Come on y/n say hiiii,” he begins to near the camera to your face.

“Does he always do this?” you ask his friends around him, and to that they nod.

“He says it’s his practice for becoming a director in the future, but….” Namjoon playfully scoffs, “I don’t see the point in recording absolutely everything.”

“Because I want to make sure when I find the project I want to create, I’ll have all the film I need.” Slowly you take your hands off your face once you notice he wasn’t going to relent anytime soon, “Come on, you know you wanna smileeee,” he sings, and slowly but surely you smile indeed. An awkward one, but a smile nonetheless.

“Well cheers to a new friendship,” Taehyung flashes you his signature boxy smile, raising his milkshake drink in the air, Namjoon and Yoongi imitating the action. You and Seokjin on the other hand create an imaginary motion as if you had drink in your hands, grateful for the blossoming friendship in the making.

“After that first day in Gwacheon, Seokjin along with his friends showed me the best spots in town, whether it was somewhere to eat or somewhere to simply get a good view, they were showing me things that proved the boring town to be different than what it seemed. 

Seokjin would especially be eager to show me his favorite spots, always recording my reactions to first time meals or whenever he’d show me a new location. When I’d ask him why, he’d tell me it was because it was like watching a kid eat candy for the first time.

Soon I’d find myself hanging out with him the most, I’m not sure if it was because we were next door neighbors or maybe it was because he was my first friend here, but it wasn’t like I was complaining. It seemed as if with every time we hung out, I was learning something new about him, never a day too dull…”

“You’re not even blowing into it,” Jin complains, watching as you blew air into the Mario game cartridge, your face getting red at your serious effort, “Let me see,” he says, but to that you stubbornly refuse, continuing to blow heavy puffs of air into it.

For the past hour the two of you had been playing his new Mario game on the Nintendo SNES, but out of nowhere the game completely blacked out. 

Suspecting that there must have been built-up dust in the cartridge, you took it as your responsibility to blow air into it.

“Fine,” you hiss, passing him the game.

“Ah don’t be like that either,” he teases, squeezing your cheek with his hand.

“Hey!” you cry out and he raises his hands to his defense.

“Sorry I can’t help it,” he laughs, “they’re just so…” he pauses, “squeezable?”

You flip him off, only making him laugh even more, “Just fix the game already,” you mumble, not actually offended, but pretending to be which he of course was used to by now.

Knock. Knock.

“Seokjinnieeee!” the sound of his younger sister’s voice, Yeonha, fills the room. Immediately she goes to tackle him, and Jin (pretending that she was stronger than him) playfully throws himself on the floor only causing her to go into a fit of giggles. 

Then out of nowhere you feel tiny arms wrap themselves around your shoulders, “Y/Nieeee,” Minjun blitzes you from behind, a grin now appearing on your face. 

With his arms still wrapped around your shoulders, you get up from the floor and begin to run around the room, pretending to be an airplane soaring across the sky.

“Do that too! Do that too!” Yeonha commands Seokjin, forcibly wrapping her arms around his very broad shoulders. 

And soon the two of you find yourselves going at “war” with one other, purposely missing each other whenever it’d look like you two would crash as a scare effect for the kids.

By the time you two were all done, you were out of breath and completely exhausted. “Again, again, again!” you hear the two kids squeal, but you were just way too tired to go at it a second time.

Feigning a sad expression on your face, you say, “I’m sorry, I have to be back for dinner soon at my house, but next time I see you I promise you we’ll do that again for you guys.”

Both of the kids, with a saddened expression on their faces, simultaneously go “Aww.” but completely understand, knowing you were never one to falsify your promises.

“Wait you do?” Seokjin asks, completely believing your lie. Glaring at him, you wink at him in a knowing way, and though it takes him a while, he quietly says “Ohh.” once he understands. Scratching the back of his neck, he says, “How bout I walk you out haha,” he innocently smiles with his eyes closed.

“Byeeee Y/N,” the kids say, their attention already on something else.

Waving goodbye, you and Jin make your way downstairs, greeted by his mom, who had used to the time that you two spent playing with kids to make dinner, 

“Already leaving Y/N?” she asks when she spots your backpack in your hand, “I made japchae, I’m sure your mom wouldn’t mind you staying for dinner,” she kindly suggests, but you politely nod your head no.

“It’s fine Mrs. Kim,” you say, “I don’t want to lessen the servings any more than I should.”

“You sure I can always—” she’s about to say something until she meets Jin’s expression, which was one of panic. Subtly he was nodding his head in a way to say that she should drop it, not only his ears, but his face becoming red. Softly chuckling to herself, she drops the subject, “Ahh well have a good night y/n.”

“Goodnight Mrs. Kim,” you dismiss yourself, Jin following right behind you as you make your way out the door.

“Whew I sure am tired,” you say once you hear the door behind you close, now standing on his front porch, the sun beginning to set, “We didn’t even get to work on our calculus homework,” you mention, feigning a chuckle. 

Jin shrugs, “I doubt we were gonna work on it either way,” he laughs changing the topic, “So y/n um…” he pauses, feeling a lump in his throat form as he nervously rocked back and forth, “I’ve been wanting to ask you something I just don’t know how you’ll react…”

You look at him with a genuine clueless expression on your face. Moments of silence pass before you respond, “Well go on ahead,” you laugh, “you know you can tell me anything,” you smile at him.

And for a moment it feels as if the words can’t come out, the fear of being denied overwhelming the feeling of hope, “Um well…” he gulps, “you know it’s been a couple of months since you moved here and well…” he avoids eye contact with you, “I feel like I see you all the time…” he continues, and for a small second you become scared … Did you do something? Did he no longer ever wanna see you again? With that thought, you feel your stomach drop, “And well I wanted to tell you that I—”

“Oh y/n honey, you forgot your notebook!” Jin’s mom suddenly opens the door, interrupting the moment and catching the both of you by surprise. 

Jin immediately shoots his mom a “What are you doing?” look, but it seems like she didn’t catch onto it as she continued having a huge smile on her face. Oh what a kind … oblivious … woman she could be sometimes.

“O-oh,” you stutter, still in a state of surprise at her sudden intrusion, “Um thank you Mrs. Kim, um I should get going!” you awkwardly laugh, “Um I’ll see you at school tomorrow Jin!” you wave goodbye, practically running back to your house. The last thing you hear before closing your own door was the sound of Jin groaning, “Moooom!”

“Ah y/n you made it just in time for dinner,” your own mother greets you, “For a moment I thought you’d spend dinner with the Kims’ for another night,” she teases, causing a ferocious blush to appear on your cheeks.

“What makes you say that?” you mumble while avoiding eye contact, only causing her to send you a knowing look.

Deciding she’d play along with your oblivious act this once, she shrugs, “Hmm I don’t know, maybe because there’s a special someone you like in that house of theirs.” 

Your blush deepens.

“Not true,” is all you can muster, “We’re just close friends, that’s all,” you state, but deep down you knew you could only wish for more.

“Mmm well y/n, time is ticking,” she playfully sings, “if you don’t confess soon, who knows when you’ll get the chance once you’re off at college. Just ask your dad, he had to wait 4 years until I came back to our hometown to confess. Isn’t that right y/f/n?” she turns to your dad, who was currently watching Cheers on the television.

Getting up from the couch, he makes his way over to you two, “What’s this about a boy I’m hearing?” he turns on his “Protective Dad” persona.

To that, you roll your eyes, “Dad,” you laugh as he ruffles your hair, placing a kiss to your forehead, “I need to go do my homework,” you announce, needing an excuse to get to your room and out of this conversation.

Your mom narrows her eyes at you, knowing exactly what you were doing but choosing to act dumb about it, “Then what are you doing here young lady, go get to it!” she commands, watching you immediately turn and make your way up the stairs.

“Ah kids these days,” your mom says under her breath, shaking her head in amusement, silently rooting for the two of you.

“I wouldn’t find out that Jin was trying to confess to me that night until a couple of years later in some random conversation, and when I tell you there were several other attempts on both his part and mine to confess, I really mean it. But it was almost as if the universe was waiting for the right moment to let it happen. I just never would’ve thought that the moment would be one so …. unexpected ….”

“So how is he?” you ask Jin’s mother, placing the care basket you made for Jin on his dining table.

“Well you know it is,” she laughs, “no parent really wants to see their kid high off of anesthesia, especially because he’s just been talking complete nonsense for the past hour and refusing to take a nap. But I prefer this than having him walk around with his wisdom teeth aching him.”

You nod your head in understanding, “You don’t mind if I—” and she nods her head yes, understanding what you were insinuating.

“Go for it,” she smiles, “he’ll probably scold me tomorrow for allowing you to see him in that state, but I’m sure he’ll get over it,” she chuckles.

And without a moment of hesitation, you make your way up the stairs and into his room, the first thing you hear is your name being loudly shouted. 

“Y/N!” he slurs out your name, his high pitched laughter following right after. 

A grin immediately appears on your face as you watch the boy who even though was usually in a joking mood most of the time, now had that same mood heightened because of the anesthesia.

You take a seat on the corner of his bed, “How are you feeling Jin?” you ask, genuinely wanting an answer.

He shoots you a toothy grin and gives you not one, but two thumbs up, “I’m feeling amaaaazinnggg,” he sings, “especially now that you’re here,” he dramatically winks.

You feel your face redden, “This is the effects of the anesthesia,” you tell yourself, not allowing yourself to have false hope.

“Y/N Y/N Y/N,” he hums, “you’re so prettyyyyyy,” he stammers his words, his swollen cheeks making it hard to take him seriously.  

“Really? You think?” you go along with him, to which he nods.

“Veryyyyy,” he adds, “too bad I can’t completely see you!” he exclaims, only causing your brow to quirk in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t see you!” he repeats in a sardonic tone, almost as if you were dumb for not understanding. It isn’t until you notice that the bangs of his mullet, which was usually parted, were now prickling at his eyes, probably causing his view of you to be blocked by certain strands of hair.

Laughing to yourself, you grab one of the hairpins you had on and scoot closer to him, carefully clipping his bangs to the side, “Ta da,” you giggle at Jin’s childlike expression, “Now you can see me,” you say.

“Now I can see you,” he repeats in awe, and maybe it was because of the effects of the anesthesia but for some reason you looked much more ethereal than usual. Suddenly, out of nowhere Jin grabs his camera from the bed stand, and you look at him in amazement.

You let out a breath of disbelief, “How is it that even when you’re high off of anesthesia, you still somehow manage to pull out that camera of yours?” you ask him.

“Because y/n, 50 years from now the world needs to know how pretty you areeeee,” he looks at you like a lovestruck fool, his eyes halfway closed as he points the lens in your direction.

“Who would’ve thought that Jin could be such a flirt?” you think to yourself.

“I’m not!” Jin pouts, and it’s only then that you realize you must’ve said the thought out loud, “I’m only flirty with you because I like youuuuu,” he gushes.

“Jin you don’t know what you’re saying,” you blink slowly, not sure whether to believe the words coming out of his mouth.

“Oh but I do!” he barks back like a toddler, “I’ve been trying to confess to you for sooooooo long but I get interrupted EACH. AND. EVERY. TIME,” he complains, and suddenly you feel your heart pound ten times faster, an idiotic smile now forming on your face, “like seriously, every time I get the courage to finally fess up, something just has to happen,” he rambles on, now turning off the camera, something you take note of.

Affectionately, you play with some of the strands of his hair from the back, watching him yawn in the process, “Come on silly boy, I think it’s time for you to sleep,” and surely he does in no time, his soft snores filling the room. 

It’s only then that you grab a post-it note from his desk, scribbling something you were sure he’d read the next day. Happily making your way downstairs, excited for what was to come.

That same night when Jin groggily woke up from his nap, he was confused as to why he had a glitter hair pin in his hair, and why his camera had a post-it note attached to it on his wooden desk. Grabbing the camera, he immediately recognized the handwriting.

‘check your footage from yesterday, you can thank me later xx. y/n.’

And it was once he did that he could’ve swore he felt his eyes go as wide as saucers, his mouth gaping completely open. “I-I confessed,” he says to himself, unsure of whether he really believed it or not, “I confessed!” he repeats to himself, this time much more confident and enthusiastic about it.

Deciding he had no time to waste, he quickly ran down his stairs, his mom confusingly staring at him as he began to grab his jacket and shoes, “And where do you think you’re going?” she asks. 

“Mom, I confessed!” he excitedly shouts before slamming the door behind him shut, ready to knock on your door.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Oh Jin!” your mother greets him, amused by his swollen right cheek, “What a surprise,” she chuckles.

“Hello Mrs. Y/L/N,” he respectfully greets, “any chance y/n’s here?” he politely asks, hoping you were home.

Based on the excited look on Jin’s face she could only imagine that he had only good news to share, and so she didn’t hesitate to call you down, “Y/N!” she shouts, and as if you were waiting for it, your bedroom door opens without a second even passing. 

Quickly you make your way down, your mom already having a sense as to what was going to happen by the excited expression on both of your faces. Closing the door once you made your way out, she immediately presses her ear against it.

“Y/N,” Jin breathes out, “I-I confe-OW,” he loudly groans, completely forgetting about his mouth still being sore from the procedure, only causing you to laugh. Even now the universe was finding ways to delay the inevitable.

“You confessed,” you instead say for him, and he nods excitedly, holding his mouth in pain. But it’s only then that he realizes … just because he confessed didn’t mean you automatically felt the same way.  

His face reddens. 

Ready to make a dash for it, you grab his hand before he could. A touching smile now on your face, “I like you too,” you say, squeezing his hand in reassurance. And immediately you see the relief wash over him, his tense shoulders relaxing.

“I’d kiss you, but I don’t think I can move my lips,” he manages to mumble out, the sudden jolt of pain minutes earlier now making it hard for him to talk.

You giggle at this, then tippy toeing and placing a peck to his lips, deciding that it’d be enough to satisfy the two of you. And without notice your mom opens the door, making the two of you jump in surprise.

“Awwwww, finally!” she pretends to weep, and you’re quick to furrow your brows.

“Mom!”

“And so that was the exact moment our friendship had officially blossomed into something more… I had officially fallen in love with the boy next door. And so we spent the rest of the school year doing whatever it is high school couples do. The occasional hand holding here and there, the timid kisses, but most importantly… despite there now being a shift in our relationship, we still spoke to one another like the best of friends we were before. Because at the end of the day he was still just the boy next door.

But of course soon we’d find ourselves having to confront the looming topic over our heads … college.”

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The door opens.

“It arrived,” you frantically say to the boy in front of you, an envelope in your hand. He motions for you to come in, his heart now beating as fast as yours.

Sitting down on the dining chair, you watch as he runs up the stairs to his room in order to grab the envelope that had arrived at his house a day prior to yours. 

The sealed envelopes, which read ‘Seoul National University” in a big blue font along with its famous logo stamped onto it were now being held by your guys’ jittery fingers. 

“When are they getting here?” you ask Jin, who had just seated himself.

Glancing at his watch, he answers, “Any second now,” his foot bounces up and down out of nervousness, “I told them to be here an hour earlier than planned because I knew they’d get here late,” he says, patting himself in the back for his trick.

“Well they need to get here faster,” you complain, tapping your nails against the table.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

“Finally,” you groan, watching the rest of your friends walk into Jin’s kitchen.

“Sorry we caught traffic,” Taehyung lies, munching on his last fry.

You roll your eyes at the poor attempt, ”You’re such a bad liar,” you say, deciding not to press him any further on the issue. “Let’s just get to opening these things.”

The boys nod, taking a final deep breath in, ready to rip open the envelopes. 

“Wait,” Jin suddenly demands, “Let me set the camera,” and immediately he’s met with dramatic eye rolls and groans, but you guys allow him to do so nonetheless. “Okay you guys, remember whatever the results are behind these, we all have to promise ourselves that it won’t change anything. It doesn’t make anyone better than the rest, and we’ll all certainly still be friends in college,” he says and you all nod in agreement, for a moment forgetting that whatever the results were inside your envelopes, you’d all still remain friends no matter what.

“Okay, 1..2...3,” you count down, and at the same time you all pull out your decision letters.

“I got in!” Namjoon yells excitedly.

“Me too!” Taehyung says after him, a grin on his face.

“Holy shit, me too,” Yoongi repeats after him.

“Me as well,” Seokjin says nonchalantly, not exactly caring for his acceptance but more about yours as he immediately turns his attention towards you. 

Having watched you stay up late studying for the entrance exams for the past couple of weeks, he knew just how nervous you were about these letters and as both your boyfriend and your friend, he couldn’t help but root for you much more than himself.

But it’s once he sees the saddened expression on your face that he knows …

“Y/N…” Taehyung whispers in sadness.

“I—” you slouch your shoulders, looking away from their gazes, “I didn’t get in,” you murmur, your voice signaling that you were on the verge of crying. 

Jin is quick to turn off the camera and goes to wrap his arms around you, placing a soft kiss on top of your head and softly rubbing your back in an effort to comfort you. He sends a look to the boys as if to say he thinks it’d be best for them to leave, for now at least.

They nod in understanding, beginning to make their way out until they hear you say “Wait!” and at an attempt to ease the tension, you try and hide the sadness in your voice, “Congratulations, truly,” you send them a weak smile before they leave, and they send you a small smile in return, sad that their friend didn’t get into the college of their dreams.

“Hey don’t cry,” Jin comforts you, giving you more pecks on top of your head, feeling his heart swell more and more by the second.

“I thought I worked so hard,” you sniffle, the tears slowly falling down your cheeks.

“Hey don’t say that! You did work hard princess,” he scolds you, pulling you into a tight hug and tipping your chin up so that he could look at you properly, a soft look on his face while he brushed your hair away from your face, “That stupid school doesn’t know what they’re missing out on, you hear me?” He squeezes your cheek when you don’t reply, “Heyyyyyyyy, don’t ignore meeee,” he teases, placing a soft kiss on your lips.

All you can do is roll your eyes once you feel your cheeks get hot, damn him and his everlasting effect on you. “My dad’s going to be so disappointed,” you mumble, already dreading the conversation. The sole reason you even wanted to get into that school was to impress him, to make him feel that he didn’t have to worry about your future.

“No he’s not,” Jin states in confidence, and you look at him in curiosity, “because your dad is nothing like mine,” he jokes, reassuring you, “Because I’m sure that for both your mom and dad, as long as you’re happy and pursuing whatever it is you want to, they’ll be more than happy to support you along the way.”

“You think so?” you ask him, a small pout on your lips.

“Ah I know so princess,” he gives you a small comforting smile, “Come on let’s watch a movie and eat some popcorn before you go home. I just bought Goodfellas on VHS the other day,” he says, leading you to the living room, the heavy feeling that had been weighing down your chest, not so heavy anymore.

“And so that night I told my parents the decision SNU had made, and just like Jin said they were completely supportive, not even the slightest disappointed. Luckily, the college that did accept me was not at all far away from Seoul National University meaning Jin and I did not have to worry about a ‘long distance relationship’ because trust me, a long distance relationship in the 90s was even ten times more harder to manage than how you kids have it today with your phones.

Honestly, our first year in college passed by in the blink of an eye. I’m not sure if it's because I was always with Jin and our group of friends running around in a big old city with so many more different things to explore, but by the time we reached our second year, we were beginning to ask ourselves where time was going by…. “

“Cheers to our first year!” you and the boys lift up your drinks of Soju, clinking the bottles as a way of commemorating your first successful year in college.

Laughter fills the air while you all talk about the good and the bad of college, from the nightmare drunk stories to typing last minute essays on a jammed computer inside the library. “To think we were all panicking about how we’d do,” Yoongi says, shaking his head.

“I know, but now we have to start declaring our majors soon,” Taehyung mentions, “I still don’t know whether I want to major in sociology or psychology…”

“Me neither, I’ve been leaning towards linguistics,” Namjoon adds, “What about you y/n?” he asks you.

You think about it for a moment before answering, “Engineering Physics.”

“Woah,” Namjoon looks at you in shock, “Good luck to you,” he jokingly scoffs.

You shrug, a certain glimmer appearing in your eyes as you make eye contact with him, “Don’t you find it interesting? The possibilities of there being more than one universe out there, different dimensions, hell maybe even a parallel universe!” you say in excitement, clearly passionate about the field, “Namjoon there’s probably hundreds of you who like to pick their nose just like you!” you throw in the playful jab, making him flip you off while the rest of the boys laugh their asses off.

“What about you Jin?” Yoongi asks his longtime friend, who for some reason tonight was quieter than usual, something clearly on his mind.

And as if brought back to reality he looks at all you with a surprised expression, “O-oh,” he stutters, “um Business Administration?” he says, unconvinced of his own answer.

Yoongi nods his head, “As expected, as expected. Business does run in the family,” and though you know Yoongi meant no harm in the comment, you couldn’t help but notice how tense Jin got after hearing it, as if it only further killed his mood.

“Hey,” you softly whisper into his ear, grabbing his attention while Yoongi begins to talk about something else, “everything good?” 

Immediately his expression softens, and he quietly nods yes, not wanting you to worry. But no matter how well Jin thought he was at hiding emotions like sadness or anger from you, any change in his behavior, albeit small or large, was always obvious to you.

Making a mental note to talk to him later, you subtly keep an eye on him for the rest of night, your mind wondering what it could be.

Jin plays with your loose strands of hair while he watches you soundly sleep, your skin warm and slick with the efforts of your earlier endeavors.

It hadn’t been long since he moved into this apartment with Namjoon, and though you weren’t exactly officially living with them, with the number of mornings he’d wake up to having you beside him, he and Namjoon might as well have considered you their third roommate. 

Not like Joon was complaining, the breakfasts he’d wake up to you making completely cancelling out the occasional use of his ear plugs for nights like these…..

Trailing his fingers across your shoulders, he traces the curves of your collarbones, savoring the moment. It wasn’t until he suddenly heard you speak that he realized you weren’t asleep at all, “Can’t sleep?” you ask, opening your eyes.

“Y/N, go to sleep, it’s late,” he mumbles in the darkness.

Ignoring him, you move to make yourself more comfortable, “Something’s bothering you,” you simply state, and that he can’t deny.

“Y/N... “ he’s about to begin, but you weren’t having any of it.

“Seokjin,” you say his full name, something you’d rarely done since you met him, “you know you can tell me,” you reassure, squeezing his hand, “it’s my job to listen,” you add for extra comfort.

And for a moment he looks as if he’s contemplating something, not really accustomed to being the one talking. 

Especially because if you were to ask anyone who’s ever known Jin, then they’d tell you they’d almost never seen the man in a bad nor sad mood. 

Because for the sake of others, Jin had always been the one to remain cheerful when things were bad, the one to crack jokes even whenever he felt down, the one who liked imitating Mariah Carey’s whistle notes in the car while driving, the person everyone could always rely on whether it be for laughs, advice, or just anything. 

It was just who Jin was as a person.

He sighs once he’s made his decision to tell you, “You know how we were talking about declaring majors and stuff tonight?” 

Silently, you nod your head, and he sighs again, “Well I was thinking about something the other day…” he pauses, shifting his body to the side, leaning his head against his hand and now completely facing you, “Remember that first conversation we had in my mom’s car the day you moved into town, when I was taking you to diner?” He asks the rhetorical question, continuing with his thoughts, “How I said that people usually have expectations already set on them and with the pressure of being successful, no one ever truly takes the risk of pursuing what they’re passionate about?”

You nod again, wondering where this was going.

“It wasn’t until earlier this month when I revisited that conversation in the midst of everyone talking about declaring majors and their future careers that I realized that really I was just talking about myself,” he sighs, and suddenly everything becomes clearer to you, and a look of understanding becomes apparent on your face.  

He gulps before continuing, “For so long I’ve been so scared to seriously pursue directing and the world of entertainment all because of my fear of disappointing my dad because Yoongi’s right … business does run in my family and I don’t know if it’s cause I’m the oldest but there’s always been an expectation set on me. An expectation to be the best. An expectation to be successful.”

Slowly, you begin to run your hands through his hair, allowing him to talk as much as he wanted because you knew this was one of the very rare moments that he was going voice everything he had been thinking for so long.

“And so when I hear people like you or Taehyung or even just classmates talk so passionately about what they wanna do in the future I can’t help but wish I had that same courage to to pursue what I want. I mean hell, look at Yoongi pursuing a career in music and producing. I like business, I do, but it’s just not for me, and now just like how you and the rest of the boys are pursuing your dreams, I wanna pursue mine, no matter what it takes. For the first time in my life I want to be 100% selfish, I want to choose me.”

He remains silent after finishing his little speech, a signal that he now wanted your input. He needed to hear something, anything, for he was tired of bearing the weight of his worries by himself.

Gathering your thoughts, you give him a kiss to the lips before continuing, your heart swelling for the man in front of you, “Jin if you want to pursue your dreams then do it,” you grab his hand and kiss his knuckle, “Because I’m just as sure you’ll be successful in the future, plus it’s better to live a life without regrets than with…” you pause, “But I also don’t think it’d be right if I wasn’t rational with you. You’re gonna have to tell your parents, and it’s also important to know that like any other career there is a risk of not making it because at the end of the day that’s how life works and sometimes things are just out of our control… but the real question is if you’re willing to accept it if it happens…”

Jin breaks away his eye contact with you, your words sadly ringing true, “Hey,” you turn his head with your hand in order to have him face you again, now resting your hand on his cheek, “Everything will be okay,” you reassure, “I’ll be with you every step of the way,” you kiss his other cheek. 

To that, he smiles.

“Tomorrow,” he randomly says, only causing you to be confused until he continues, “Tomorrow I’m going home and telling my parents what I wanna do. And you’re coming with me… for moral support that is,” he shoots you a grin, and for a moment your eyes are wide in surprise because well… you certainly weren’t expecting him to do it so soon, “Please?” he pouts, making you roll your eyes playfully.

“Like you have to ask,” you say, tightly wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders and burying your face in the crook of his neck, a good night’s sleep following soon after.

“If only we had known things weren’t going to go down as smoothly as we thought it was…”

“Dad you don’t get it…” Jin pushes his hair back with his hand, a sign that he was stressed.

His dad scoffs, “What’s there not to get? You’re choosing something that’s a complete risk over something that has a future, a guaranteed solid one at that. Let’s be feasible here Seokjin...”

Silently you watch the exchange between father and son. Yeah, the two of you knew that there’d be some backlash to Jin’s decision from his parents (if not only his father) but to be here for over 3 hours now, watching the two go back and forth wasn’t what anyone had expected. Neither side relenting on why the other was wrong. But time was ticking, and soon one would pop, you just hadn’t expected it to be Jin first.

“I just can’t dad!” he shouts, interrupting his dad, his voice echoing across the walls. Momentary silence followed, enough to hear a pin drop fall, “I-I just can’t,” Jin’s voice breaks, his eyes desperately pleading for his dad to just once in his life understand.

A scornful laugh comes out of his dad’s mouth before he exhales a big deep breath, “Okay,” he monotonously states, and for a moment a flicker of hope appears in both Jin’s and your eyes, but as fast as it came, it left even quicker, “You can pursue your little venture into the world or entertainment and directing, but just know I never agreed to paying for a degree in Film, I agreed to one in Business. And so if you really want it that bad, it’s coming out of your pocket,”he declares, shocking everyone in the room. 

“Sungjin,” Jin’s mother, who had only watched the exchange like you the whole time, finally speaks up, in just as much as shock as you and Jin. Paying for college out of his pocket? That was almost impossible.

Jin’s father raises his hand, as if to let him continue, “Be grateful I’m still agreeing to pay for that apartment of yours, I’m not cruel enough to let my own son jump from place to place.”

Jin shakes his head, “No,” he says, and you look at him confused, “I’ll pay for my own apartment as well as everything else you help pay for,” with a hardened scowl now on his face he continues, “and I’ll prove you wrong,” he declares. 

His father could only look at him with skepticism until his own expression followed his son’s. The two really were two sides of the same coin.

“Come on y/n let’s go,” he scoffs, getting up from his chair and going to kiss his mom on the cheek, you politely (but also awkwardly) dismiss yourself, following him outside and into his car.

“Why the hell did you do that?” you finally ask, one of the many questions you had running in your head, “and how the hell do you plan on paying for everything out of your own pocket?”

“Because y/n,” he runs his hand through his hair, turning on the car in order to let the ignition warm up, “I want to prove him wrong,” he repeats his reasoning from earlier, shrugging his shoulders in the process, “I’ll just pick up extra hours at work, holiday season is starting soon and my manager being the lazy man he is would rather overwork an employee aka me than hire someone new.”

You pout, “Does that mean no more movie nights?” you whine, making him laugh.

“We’ll still have them princess,” he gives you a peck on the cheek, “Just not as frequent that’s all,” he then follows the kiss with a squeeze on the cheek, “meaning we have to savor them more,” he concludes, the two of you well on your way home, a happy couple once in love.

“This …. This is where our story slowly begins to take a bit of shift. It’s where the bright flowers we once held onto so tightly begin to slowly wilt when faced with the real world, where destiny and fate cross roads, creating and molding choices both within and out of our control…”

“Place your tassels to the left...” the students in the arena follow the command. “and congratulations to the new class of 1996!” the chancellor of SNU announces, and soon the sight of graduation caps being thrown left and right follows. 

You feel your throat go sore from the amount of cheering you’re doing on the stands, watching as Jin and your group of friends hug in celebration, following with excited waves directed towards you and Jin’s mother along with his siblings.

Jin’s father, who claimed he was too busy with work, wasn’t able to make it, not that it was much of a surprise to anyone. Ever since Jin declared his financial independence from his dad, their relationship wasn’t exactly a favorable one, not that there was ever much to work with. 

But in the end Jin understood his father and he understood why he couldn’t be supportive because like any other parent all Jin’s father wanted was to ensure Jin lived a successful life where he wouldn’t have to worry about finances and whether there’d be food on the table albeit it be for only himself or his future family.

The class song, “Fantasy” by Mariah Carey begins to play, and you feel your stomach cramp at laughing so hard because of Jin’s sudden dancing, the boys soon following his movements. You really had to take him to a Mariah Carey concert soon.

“Let’s go meet them in the parking lot,” Jin’s mother shouts over the chaos of people leaving the bleacher stands.

You nod, following her lead, all while helping Minjun and Yeonha (who were now 10) not get lost in the crowd. Once you make it to the parking lot, you find Jin, who had made it there before you all, and immediately you run to hug him, his siblings following suit.

His mom who's holding his famous old camcorder, records the moment, but once Jin spots it, he’s quick to cover his face by nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck. “How is it that the person always recording things, hates being recorded?” you chuckle, trying to push him off so that he’d have no choice but to be recorded.

“Mm don’t forget being pictured,” he mumbles, maneuvering you in a way that he could reach the camera in his mom’s hands, tackle her into a big hug and successfully get her to turn off the camera.

“Congratulations my Seokjin,” his mom kisses his cheek, ruffling his hair like she did when he was a kid. 

Jin, who ditched the mullet about two years ago, now sported a more clean cut look, resembling a comma in the front while still a little lengthy from the sides. In a way it made him look a bit more youthful, not that he had to worry, for that man truly did not age. You were sure that even now at 21 years of age, Jin was going to look like this for the rest of his life because 4 years ago at age of 17 he looked exactly the same. You could only hope your own genes did the same.

“Thanks mom,” he smiled.

“Now for a picture,” she said while pulling out a Kodak disposable camera from her purse, but before she could even attempt at taking a picture, Jin was already getting into his car.

“Ahh later mom, let’s just go eat for now,” he announces, “The graduation boy is really hungry,” he gives her the puppy dog eyes before entering the car.

She rolls her eyes, “Fine. We’ll meet you two over there,” she says, “Come on you two,” she motions to the two twins to follow her back to her car.

“I still can’t believe you wanna drive all the way out to that old diner in Gwacheon as a way of celebrating your graduation,” you say as Jin reverses out of his parking spot, one hand on the steering wheel while the rest of his body was turned to make sure that no cars were passing.

Once he was safely out of the parking lot, he then replies, “Because y/n, there’s nothing better than a nice BLT sandwich on a Saturday night, don’t you think?”

“They’re not even all that—” you’re about to lecture him until he interrupts.

“Ah Ah ah, I’m the graduation boy,” he pouts while driving, “We went all the way to Itaewon to try that Italian food you wanted so bad when it was your graduation day, and you didn’t hear me complain.”

You narrow your eyes at him, damn him …

“Mm,” you mumble.

“Oh I love this song!” Jin, with his right hand, turns up the volume to the radio, “Californiaaaa loveeee,” he repeats after the robot, the music now blasting in the background as he gets on the highway, now on your way back home.

“Passing” you the imaginary mic in his hand, he expects you to sing with him and for a moment you stare at him with a deadpan look until of course you smile at his foolishness, “California knows how to party,” you sing, passing him the “mic”.

“In the cityyyyy of LA,” he continues along, and it goes like this the whole car ride. The two of you going back and forth singing songs from famous artists such as the Backstreet Boys, Boyz II Men, Radiohead, Nirvana, and of course Jin’s favorite, Miss Mariah Carey.

And just like that the day goes by in the blink of an eye, from eating at the diner with his mom and siblings, to visiting your parents until finally the two of you found yourselves sitting on your porch just like the good old days. 

Resting your head against his shoulder, both of you stare at the sky above in silence, the stars out and shining bright tonight.

“We really graduated,” you say in disbelief, breaking the silence. Jin turns his attention to you, a small smile on his face.

“Crazy huh?” he interlocks his hand with yours, kissing the knuckles of it, “Time went by in the blink of an eye, and now we’re officially in the real world. Nothing but a tiny speck in such a large universe, almost like the stars,” he chuckles looking back up to the sky, and you gaze at him with a soft look in your eyes. If only he knew how much brighter he shined compared to them. 

“Jin…” you randomly say, “I love you,” and though he’s heard it come out of your mouth many many times before tonight, each and every time he did hear it, his heart swelled the same as the first.

Unlocking his hand from yours, he instead wraps his arm across your shoulder, gently bringing you closer to him, enough that you could even hear the sound of his heart beating. Something that not even a video camera could capture. This was a memory you two would just have to remember on your own when you are both old and grey.

“I love you too princess,” he whispers, “I love you too,” he repeats to himself, “You know, I’ve been thinking these days about our future...” you look up at him from your position, childlike curiosity now shown across your face, “I feel like since we’ve always lived moment to moment since we’ve met, I’ve never really asked you…” he pauses debating whether to ask, “what kind of future do you want?”

Softly chucking, you shrug, “You really wanna hear it?” you ask, and he furrows his brows, almost offended you’d even ask, but rather than scold you he simply nods, “Hmm..” you think for a moment, “I picture us both having successful careers and living in the big city while we’re at our peak, getting married on a whim and occasionally traveling the world in search of an adventure,” you pause, “but when the time comes to finally relax, then I’d want to move back here, to where it’s calm and quiet, buy ourselves a house and maybe we’d even have a kid, just one though,” you emphasize.

He arches his brow, “Just one?” he asks.

You nod your head, “After babysitting your siblings, yes, just one,” you repeat with laughter and he himself can’t help but laugh, “I think a girl preferably, but I wouldn’t be mad at a boy, They would probably take after you in looks,” you add, nudging his shoulder. 

He blushes for a moment, before faking smugness and winking at you.  

You laugh at his confidence before continuing, “And we’d show them the different places this town has just like how you showed me, enough that they’d want to stay here when they’re older,” Jin notices how your eyes glisten as you talk of a time that felt so far away, “And we’d be a small little happy family, supporting whatever it is that their dream will be. And then we’d grow old and grey, maybe have a couple of grandkids running around, and we’d simply be proud of the life we’ve built together—”

And before you could continue on any further, the feeling of his soft lips placed against yours interrupts you, nothing but passion exchanged in the kiss. It isn’t until you’re both out of breath that you break away, Jin immediately framing his hands over your cheeks, “Promise me?” he asks, and you wrinkle in confusion, “Promise me you’ll live a life you’re proud of?”

“As long as you do the same,” you softly answer in return, and silently he nods, “then let’s do it.”

“If only I knew … If only he had been honest with me that night then maybe things could’ve been talked about right then and there before it got out of control…”

Jin crumples the rejection letter and throws it in the trash, frustrated by yet another rejection letter from a directing internship. Tonight he was visiting his parents for dinner while you were out of town on a trip to Busan with some college friends you’d met your freshman year. Taking the opportunity of being by himself in your guys’ apartment, he shredded the number of rejection letters he’d received from several programs in the past couple of months. Too ashamed to show you them.

Looking at himself in the mirror, he couldn’t but feel frustrated. It’d been a year since the two of you had graduated college, and while your career in engineering physics was going great, he couldn’t say the same about his career in directing. Of course when you’d ask how everything was going, he’d feign a smile and say he was still waiting to hear back, guilty that he was incapable of telling you the truth.  

Fixing the yellow unbuttoned dress shirt he was wearing over his plain white t-shirt and striped vest, he combs a hand through his hair one last time before leaving, feeling as if his head was about to explode.

“I made Naengmyun, your favorite,” Jin’s mother sets the bowl of noodles down along with several other sides, making sure her oldest son was eating good tonight. She was also trying to mitigate the awkwardness that was in the air tonight, this being one of the very rare occasions Jin and his father spent time together. Over the last year, things still were still stiff between the two, Jin’s father still clearly not accepting of his career choice.

Jin, who didn’t have much of an appetite, stirred with his noodles, hoping his mother wouldn’t notice.

“So Seokjin…” his mothers begins once she seats herself, “how’s everything been going so far?” she asks, genuinely wanting to know what her son has been up to these days.

Jin, trying not to look too uninterested, gives a simple response, “Um it’s been going good,” he casually says.

She nods, “What about y/n?” she asks, always interested in hearing about you.

At this question, Jin seems to perk up more, this change in behavior not going unnoticed by someone else at the table, “Great,” he says, “she’s currently working at a paid internship for some technical writing company that specializes in space and astronomy,” he continues on, “she really seems to love it.” 

A smile appears on his mother’s face, happy to know that you were doing great. 

“But what about you?” the voice across the table suddenly asks, and Jin is met with the glare of his father, “you seem to have so much to say about y/n, but so little about yourself,” his dad comments, and Jin could physically feel his stomach drop, his words reminding him of what he just shredded at home not too long ago.

“What do you want me to say?” Jin asks, hiding his nervousness through a monotone voice.

His dad scoffs, “That you’re doing something with your life,” he says a little too harshly, “that you’re not living in the shadow of your girlfriend.”

“Sungj—”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Jin sneers in the same amount of attitude his dad had.

“Seokjin!” his mother shouts, “That’s your father you're speaking to,” she reminds him, believing that the practice of respect should still be something upheld no matter what, “Kids, go to your room,” she tells the twins, and without question they do.

Jin quickly calms himself down, just wanting to leave before this escalated any more, “It means that I told you that business was the way to go, but no you were so adamant on proving me wrong and pursuing your dreams that now you can’t even guarantee yourself an independent future!” his dad spat in return, his voice now raising with every sentence . The bottled feelings from years ago now spilling out... rapidly at that.

“Why is it that with you it’s always business, business, business?” Jin throws his hands in the air, “I mean really that’s all I’ve ever heard from you growing up! Jin you need to be like this, Jin you need to make sure you do this, Jin I need this from you,” he mocks his dad, “I mean really is that all you care about dad? Meeting your expectations? Following your footsteps?”

“I do it because you’re my son Seokjin! My son, who I thought I raised to think critically, to strive for success—”

“You think I’m not trying?” Seokjin shouts, his voice turning hoarse at the end, “You think I wanted to fail? To have to come to the realization that—” he stutters, “that shit’s not going how I planned it?” Jin’s mother feels her eyes brim with tears, “That while my long time girlfriend is on her way to becoming a star in her field that I’m stuck waiting tables with a useless degree in my pocket! Is that what you want me to say, dad? Is that it?”

He remains silent.

“You think I don’t know that I’ve made a mistake? That I don’t wake up with the dread of knowing that I’m not at all good for her? That while she could be with someone who makes just as much money as she does and actually provides for her, she decides to stick with me? The person who can hardly offer her anything?” rather than feeling a weight come off his shoulders, Jin feels an extra burden get added on, almost feeling suffocated.

“Well then I’m sorry dad! I’m sorry I couldn’t be the magnificent first born son you wanted!” by now tears are spilling out of Jin’s eyes in such a rapid pace that his vision blurs.

All his father can do is stare at him, unsure of what to say or do.

Growing up Jin’s father wasn’t much of an affectionate parent, that role being filled more by his mother than his dad. If anything his father usually kept more of a reserved and stoic personality, his love language shown by the long nights of work he puts in for his family at the office and the constant pushing for success. And so here in this moment, to have his oldest son who he’d push to his complete limit cry his heart out in front of him, probably in desperate need of a hug, Sungjin just couldn’t bring himself to comfort him.

And so instead he simply said, “Goodnight Seokjin,” in the softest voice possible, before making his way upstairs to his bedroom, leaving the words he so desperately wanted to say unsaid.

Jin feels the arms of his mother hug him, her eyes as teary stained as his, “Ah Seokjin,” her voice breaks as she attempts to comfort him.

“I—” Jin hesitates, “I need to go back home mom,” and gently he breaks away from the hug.

“Seokjin…” his mother worries, “Just stay here for the night, I’ll grab your old sheets from the closet and—”

“Mom,” he simply says, a way of finalizing his decision

Knowing she wasn’t going to be able to convince him, she squeezes his shoulder in an effort to comfort him, “Drive safe,” she says.

He nods, just wanting to go home and sleep the night away.

Unlocking the door to your guys’ apartment, Jin was surprised to see you in the kitchen making ramen, your packed bags laid across the couch. 

Having heard the door open, you turn to face him, “Hey—” and almost immediately your expression goes from one of happiness to one of concern. Quickly you rush towards him, his puffy eyes telling you that he’d been crying, “Hey, what’s wrong?” you raise your hand to cup his cheek.

Jin simply stares at you with a saddened look, unsure of what to say. “Hey, I’ve realized tonight after an argument with my father that I’m a complete utter failure, and you have no chance at a happy future by being with me.” Is that what he should say? It was the truth, wasn’t it?

“It’s—” he pauses, “It’s nothing,” he lowers your hand from his face, taking off his shoes and setting his keys down.

“Seokjin—”

“Y/N, it’s nothing,” he repeats, his way of telling you that he was serious, “I’m going to bed,” he exhales a deep sigh, making his way towards the bedroom, leaving you standing in the living room by yourself, wondering what in the hell just happened?

The next morning, as per usual Jin awoke to an empty bed, your Monday’s usually having you go in very early in the morning. 

Jin groaned as he got up, remembering that today was his day off. God, did he just wanna stay in bed all day, but remembering that the two of you were running low on groceries, he thought might as well make himself useful and do the buying for the week.

Looking at himself in the bathroom mirror, he noticed the strands of his hair he once kept short now getting longer, resembling the mullet he used to have when he was a teen. Not that he hated it or anything, but it was an odd sight to see, and so he grabbed his hair cutting scissors from the cabinet and began to unevenly chop the long strands of hair ultimately resulting in a chopped banged look. To make it look more natural, he ruffled his hair at the end, not bothering to style it.

After that he changed into casual clothing and made his way to the grocery store, relying on nothing but his pure memory for the things he needed to buy. 

Humming while pushing the cart full of groceries back to his car, he stops when something catches his eye. 

Across the street was the headquarters of one of the internships he had applied for. And maybe it was due to the argument he had with his dad the day before, or the fact that he’d been feeling like a complete utter failure recently, but getting into his car, Jin couldn’t bring himself to drive away and go back home. Instead he got out of the car and began to walk across the street, unsure of what it was he was planning to do.

Ding. Ding.

Jin rings the service bell, that impulsive courageous feeling he felt earlier suddenly abandoning him.

A man, who looked like he was near Jin’s age, walks out of the back office, a tag that read the name “Jungkook” pinned on the left side of his chest, “Hello, how can I help you?” he greets, a small smile on his face.

“Oh um—” Jin becomes flustered, but deciding that there was no backing down he continued on, “I sent in an application here a couple of months ago and I haven’t heard back from anyone, so I was just wondering—”

Jungkook’s face becomes one of nervousness, “Oh I’m sorry sir—” he tries to interrupt but Jin relents.

“If there’d been some kind of delay in the process, and well if there has been, if I could talk to someone because I really need—”

“Sir,” Jungkook repeats, this time halting Jin from continuing, “that position you’re talking about was filled months ago,” he practically whispers with a look of both awkwardness and pity on his face, “maybe your letter got lost in the mail, but there’s not really much you can do by coming in here.”

Jin, clearly in denial, nods his head no, “Please,” he pleads, “I just need to talk to someone for like ten minutes at most, I swear.”

“Sir—”

“Can’t you write down my number or something? Pass it on at least?!”

Jungkook can only stare at the frantic man, unsure of what to say or do, “I-” he stutters, “I can’t,” he ultimately says, not wanting to give this man false hope nor waste his time by writing his name and number down, “I’m gonna have to call security if you don’t leave,” he says, voice wobbling. 

It’s only then that Jin realizes how crazy he must’ve looked. Not only was he in casual clothing, but his hair was all messy and he was sure his eyes must’ve been dilated in cause of his desperation.

“I’m-I’m sorry,” he whispers under his breath, hastily making his way out. 

What was he thinking? Barging in and demanding things like that…. God he was losing it. Though he knew better than to let his dad’s words get to him, for some reason they were just eating at him.

“... it’s also important to know that like any other career there is a risk of not making it because at the end of the day that’s how life works and sometimes things are just out of our control… but the real question is if you’re willing to accept it if it happens…”

Your words from years ago ring in his head, and he shakes his head in denial. No he wasn’t … he wasn’t willing to accept it and he knew he’d only continue looking like a fool if he didn’t. But he just couldn’t. Because fully accepting it would mean he’d let you down. That the person you said you were sure was going to make it, was nothing but a failure.

And so he walks back to his car, dreadfully going back home, forgetting the words you spoke after. 

That everything would be okay, and that you’d be with him every step of the way.

“Since the day Jin and I had met, we had never seriously fought over anything, yeah, we’d occasionally get into a petty quarrel, but never enough to really get us truly mad. Things like which character in a movie was morally correct, or who ate the leftovers from the night before were as heated as our arguments ever got, and even then we’d always forgive each other after a couple of hours of cooling off, but this time… this time it was different. This time it was serious.”

Opening the door, Jin sighed as set down the bagged groceries on the floor, mentally and physically exhausted from everything, personally declaring to himself that this week was just a really bad week for him. 

Taking off his shoes, he began to make his way into the kitchen, deciding that maybe a cold cup of water would relax him. 

But when he was met with you, sitting on the kitchen isle’s chair with several shredded pieces of paper on the surface of the isle in front of you, along with an unshredded one in your hand, he was sure he wanted to curl up in a ball and disappear.

The look on your face said everything, it was a mixture of betrayal, anger, and sadness all in one. The two of you stared at each other for the longest, words not having to be exchanged in order to understand what was going on, until finally you break the silence and it’s what you ask that Jin swore he felt his soul go cold, “W-Why?” is all you say, your voice weak and fragile.

He gulps down the lump in his throat, the words barely managing to come out of his mouth, “Because y/n I just—” he pauses, unsure of what to say, “I just couldn’t tell you,” he ultimately says, pushing his hair back with his hand.

“But why?” you repeat the same question from before, your voice now growing louder as you get up from the seat, “I just don’t understand,” you add because no, you weren’t angry, you weren’t sad … you were hurt. You were concerned. You were worried. For you had just found out that the man you loved more than anything went to this extent to hide something from you. To hide something so … trivial.

Tears well up in your eyes when you notice the glossiness in his own eyes, “You—” his voice cracks, “You wouldn’t get it,” he states, and this causes you to get defensive.

“I’m sure I would, if you’d just talk to me,” you barked back, coming closer to him, “Whatever it was, it should’ve never resorted to this!” you flail the paper in your hands around. 

You don’t mean to yell, but you do. It was frustration that was coming out of your mouth, he had to understand that … right? 

Sighing you continue, “Today at work I just couldn’t focus, not when I knew there was something seriously bothering you,” you explain how you’d come to find the paper along with the rest of it’s shredded companions, “So I asked if I could leave early, thinking that since you had the day off I could maybe possibly get whatever it was out of you. Of course seeing that you weren’t here, I did some snooping of my own and well…” you shake your head.

“You’ve been lying to me for months Seokjin…. each time I’d ask you if you’d heard anything you’d say no, knowing you had … and for what? Because you didn’t wanna show me that you got rejected?” you sigh in dismay because despite him not answering you, you knew exactly why he didn’t tell you anything, “I would’ve helped you, you know? We could’ve worked on your resume or make a better project to show, I could’ve helped,” you grab his hand, a way of wanting to show that even now you were still beside him, “Say something Jin,” your voice breaks.  

“You don’t—” he looks down at you, “You don’t get it y/n,” he monotonously repeats, removing your hand from his and walking towards the bedroom, a tired expression on his face. 

He could feel it… he could feel himself cracking. With every minute that continued to pass in this wretched day, the selfless Jin everyone knew and loved was reaching his breaking point and the last person he wanted to take it out on was you. But you just kept pushing.

“Seokjin!” you force him to turn around by pulling at his hand, “Just talk to me!” you demand.

“And say what!” he finally screams, “What do you want me to say y/n?!” he cries out, tears spewing out of his eyes, “That I completely failed at my dream? That my dad was right, and that film was nothing but a mistake? That I could be working at some fancy company that pays a decent salary rather than relying on tips from a hard day’s work? That when I look at myself in the mirror, I see nothing but a failure!”

“Don’t say that about yourself,” you demand.

“It’s true isn’t it?” he questions, “Can’t you see that I’m not the person you think I am, that you’ve wasted your time being with some—”

“Just shut up already,” you grit your teeth, “... can’t you see I don’t care? I don’t care if you’re the richest or poorest man on Earth, I don’t care if your dad thinks that your career path is wrong, I don’t care if you or other people think you don’t deserve what you have, I just don’t care! What I do care about is your happiness and that shouldn’t rely on meeting other people’s expectations, including my own Seokjin. Because trust me, as long as I’m with you, I’m the happiest girl in the world. I promise you, if there’s one thing that’s true in this world, it’s that,” you lay your heart bare.

By now the both of you are crying, tears silently rolling down from the corners of each other's eyes. 

It hurt to see Jin think so lowly of himself, especially when you knew just how much of an amazing person he was.

“Y/N…” he whispers your name as softly as he can, “I’m just really tired, and I just really wanna go to sleep,” his voice breaks.

“Seokjin—”

“Please?” he frowns, his eyes yearning to be closed.

“I’ll—” you pause for a moment, “I’ll see you in bed then,” you ultimately say, sadness looming in the air for the words unsaid.

Silently nodding, Jin makes his way to the bedroom, gently shutting the door behind him and exhaling a deep breath of air, silent muffled sobs finally escaping. A decision already set in his mind.

“A part of me used to think that I should’ve immediately went to bed that night, that then I would’ve caught him crying and maybe we could’ve thoroughly talked everything out that night, but then I think about all of the events that later happened after that night, and that’s when I understand that maybe we were doomed from the beginning…”

It had been a couple of weeks since the argument with Jin and though your interactions were still a little stiff with one another, you were still hopeful that things would get better. They had to.

Sighing, you unlock the door to your apartment, ready to take a nap after a long day of work. Kicking off your shoes, you say something outloud, assuming that Jin was in the kitchen like he usually was whenever you’d come back from work, “Jin take out the kimchi from the fridge for me please,” your voice weirdly echoes across the room, changing your course of direction from the bathroom to the kitchen.

“Jin?” you ask to an empty kitchen, “Hm,” you hum to yourself, maybe he was in the bedroom …

Walking inside, you see that he isn’t there, but what you do notice is the sudden emptiness of the room. The clothes he’d have thrown around no longer scattered around the room, and his little Mario figurines were no longer on the wooden shelf you two had built from scratch …. What in the hell was going on?

“Seokjin?” you shout again, hoping this was some kind of stupid prank on his part. 

In a panicked manner, you look inside every possible room in the apartment, from the closets to the restroom, Jin being nowhere to be found. It isn’t until you do a second search of the kitchen that you notice that there was a note on the floor (most likely accidentally falling to the floor earlier).

Eyebrows furrowing when you read the note, you immediately grab your keys, shock and anger acting as your driving force.

“Right when I left, it began to rain heavy... It’s weird … I remember driving with such a rage that night I was sure I was driving recklessly… but for some reason, as ironic as it was, there was an artist playing on the radio that must’ve kept me at bay, Mariah Carey singing Without You …”

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The door opens.

“Ah Y/N,” Mrs. Kim greets you, her apron from either cooking or baking still on, “I feel like I haven’t seen you in such a long time,” she chuckles, hugging you in the process. Despite your current dilemma, you feign a smile, not wanting to be disrespectful even if you were in a horrible mood. “Is Seokjin with you?” she genuinely asks, and this causes your expression to be one of shock.

He wasn’t here? Then where the hell was he?

“O-oh no,” you stutter, partially due to the freezing weather, “I thought he was here...” you say, and his mother’s face immediately becomes one of concern.

“No...” she hesitantly says, clearly confused, “Not that I know of,” she furrows her brows, “Oh honey, you’re soaking, come in, come in,” she insists, “maybe we can try calling his job using the house phone,” she begins to ramble, but you stop yourself before completely entering, a sudden thought crossing your mind.

“A-a-actually it’s fine,” you say, “I think I know where he is.”  

She tilts her head in confusion, “Are you sure? The rain is only getting heavier, and I’m sure neither Seokjin or your parents would want you driving in these conditions,” she says, noting the dull look in your eyes. You appreciated her concern, for you knew she loved you in her own special way, always imagining that you’d one day be her future daughter in law.

It was only expected really, you’d been in Jin’s life for almost 7 years now, both she and your mom always glancing at your ring finger whenever you’d visit, itching to see it decorated by a piece of jewelry. 

If only Ms. Kim knew that that dream was slowly slipping away from your grasp at this current moment …

“Yes I’m sure Mrs. Kim,” you finally respond, “Don’t worry, I’ll drive safe,” you try to say as lightheartedly as possible.

Hesitantly, she nods, allowing you to leave.

“When Mrs. Kim had offered me to come inside, something had hit me out of nowhere and I remembered that it was raining. Pouring in fact. And my mind suddenly went back to the days when we were 17, remembering how he’d knock on my door with a bag of takeout after coming back from the one place you could always find him at on a rainy day… the diner. ”

Water is dripping from all over your body when you enter the diner, from your hair to your clothes, you were drenched in mother nature’s tears. The only thing that wasn’t completely soaking wet was the note in your hand, the one you slammed on the booth’s table he sat at once you spotted him.

He looks up at you with a pained expression on his face, “Everything I do is for you, and this is for the best. Don’t come looking for me, for I’ll be long gone by the next morning’s sunrise. I’m sorry. Yours forever, Jin,” you read the note out loud to him, a mixture of anger and hurt found in your voice.

He remains silent, watching as your fingers trembled in anger, “What?” you rhetorically ask, “Did you think I wasn’t going to come all the way down here to look for you, that I was just gonna accept this bullshit of a letter or whatever the fuck you wanna call it, and call it a day? Is that what you honestly thought?”

After several minutes of continuous silence, your voice rises in anger, “Don’t just look at me, say something!” you yell.

“Y/N,” he says, the volume in which you said it, catching the attention of the late night goers also at the diner, “you’re causing a scene.”

You take a seat across from him, planning on being as loud as you needed to be until you got some answers, “How could I not when my boyfriend of over 7 years decides to pack up his things and leave to God knows where while only leaving some sorry excuse of a note for me.” your voice shakes, “What the hell did you expect?”

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, genuinely meaning the two simple words, more than you could ever know. Did you think he wanted to leave you? That he wanted to toss away everything you two had built to the trash? That he wanted to hurt the person who meant the most to him in this world? Of course he didn’t. But he had to be the bad guy in this story. Not for him, but for you. Because he loved you so much, that’d he’d do anything to see you live the life you dreamt of.

“No,” you say, “I don’t believe this,” you fling the letter around in his face, “I need you to tell it to my face, then I’ll believe you,” tears begin to well up in your eyes. There was just no way. The Jin you knew would never do this to you, never in a million years.

“Y/N—” he sighs, but he knows you won’t relent until you hear it from him, “Y/N we can’t be together anymore,” he says, and the words echo in your mind as he continues, “After tonight we’ll be nothing more than strangers,” he says in such a monotone voice, if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was a heartless being.

What you didn’t know was that Jin wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. Every nerve in his body was begging him to break out in tears, but no matter how much he wanted to … he just couldn’t bring himself to break outwardly. Not right now at least. Because right now he needed to be unbreakable.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” a single teardrop slowly rolls down your cheek, the agonizing ache you felt in your heart now growing because of his words, “Seokjin,” you whimper, “I-If this is because of what you were saying a couple of weeks ago,” forcibly you grab his hand from across the table, your lips quivering in fear of losing the person you loved the most, “then why can’t you see I don’t care? Because to me you’ll always be the tall, lanky, boy with an outdated mullet who first showed me around town 7 years ago with a camera pointed at my face. Because as long as we’re with each other, we’ll get through anything Seokjin …” you squeeze his hand tighter, “You’re my person Seokjin, mine, and mine only,” you try to smile, only causing more tears to spill out of your eyes as they crease. 

“Y/N…” just accept it, is what he wants to say because what he was about to say would change how you viewed him, it would make you question everything you ever knew about the person you loved, “I don’t know what else I can say or do for you to understand that I just don’t want to be with you anymore,” he feels the a knot forming in his throat, as if to tell him to stop immediately, that what he was saying would have irreversible consequences, “And I haven’t been for a while…” How disgusting he was.

“You’re—” your voice croaks, “You’re a liar—Seokjin please....” you cry.

He pulls his wallet out and sets the money for his meal down, getting up from his seat in the process, “I truly am sorry Y/N…” is all he can say, before giving you a final kiss on the forehead, his feet fighting against his will to turn around and apologize. To tell you that he was just being an idiot and beg for your forgiveness. But he couldn’t.

He wouldn’t.

And so pushing the door open, he took one final glance at you, knowing he’d left his heart with you.

#ficswithluv #btswritingcafe #btswriterscollective #seokjin fic #bts fic #bts angst #bts fluff #jin fic #seokjin fanfic #seokjin/reader #seokjin x reader #bangtan fanfic #bts fanfic #bts fanficition #bts reader #seokjin one shot #seokjin angst #jin angst #jin fluff #seokjin fluff #Kim seokjin angst #Kim seokjin fluff #Kim seokjin #Kim seokjin fanfiction

[vancilocs]

Is kabal and zephi on the table 👀 just dont answer what doesnt apply aaand colm and naomi?

they have a Thing going on

Who's the one who's reckless and always getting into trouble while the other gotta pull em out

They both think the other is the reckless one! But not getting in trouble, just being careless. Kabal would always like to make sure Zephi gets home safe and Zephi makes Kabal promise he drives safely

Colm doesn't think there's anything reckless about Naomi going into the forest during new moon, his mom disagrees

Who's the one to send the other "I love my gf/bf" memes

Kabal sends memes appreciating rude and powerful women who kick him in the nuts

If they had phones, Naomi more

Who's the one who listens to a music genre the other doesn't like and how does the other react

Kabal is dad rock 100% and that's his playlist when on roadtrips, Zephi is welcome to suggest other songs or even make her own roadtrip playlist if she wants to, but please don't be rude abt his taste in music

They'd both listen to folk rock sampled with mushroom growth sounds and throat singing

How one spoils the other more and do they ever get competitive to show the other more love

Not really? Zephi spoils Kabal by letting him stay at her place for a night or two, he spoils her by giving her flowers sometimes

Colm spoils Naomi by giving her extra affection, Naomi spoils Colm by letting him be by himself sometimes (but makes sure solitude doesn't drive him into a worse headspace)

How many years did it take to get married or was it just not for them

They haven't even discussed being serious yet, marriage isn't a big thing for either so like. It's whatever

Weddings and marriage aren't really a big thing in the clan, people just end up together and move in together and have kids without there necessarily being a ceremony (more like just a bonfire party). They just... became an item.

Are their friends/family supportive

Yeah... mostly. Mehara is fine with Zephi, Hafza is happy for her dad, Gabriel is pleased Zephi might have found someone fun. Herah is still very dubious but also doesn't want to interfere too much, Zephi is a grown woman who can do her own decisions

Very much so, Mahran is so happy to see Colm happy and she also very much likes Naomi. Myra couldn't be more pleased, Kaede is glad and Koldun doesn't really care but he's not very close with Colm in the first place

How does one comfort the other when the other is in distress/having a panic attack/crying

-

Naomi has to be careful because if she spooks Colm when he's agitated he will teleport by accident and she doesn't want him dropping himself off the rooftop again. Just speak to him calmly, give him his own space, reassure him he's safe and at home. If he allows, hold his hand or hug him. If Naomi's crying or otherwise distressed Colm will just hug her and pet her hair until she's okay.

Which one dissociates

-

Colm mainly

Which one stares at the other's booty like "damn" and how does the other react when catching them

Both honestly and neither really minds? Kabal will just ask if Zephi likes what she sees

Neither much, sometimes it's fun to walk past and give the other's butt a pat just to hear them giggle

When they live together what kinda place do they live in? What does their home look like?

More like what does Zephi's place look like, Kabal is practically homeless lmao

Cozy and warm, not too small so it fits their kids later on as well, decorated with dried plants and wreaths and branches etc., a bit messy sometimes but it's very much a home and a very comforting place

What do their dates look like

Grabbing fast food or going to a diner after work at like midnight or 2am, maybe going to a bar for a couple, Kabal being invited to Zephi's place, he brings flowers and gets tied to a chair

Go for a long forest walk, maybe take some food along and have a picnic on a cliff or something, enjoy calm nature, have a snuggle, kiss a little, avoid werewolves,

How does each act when getting drunk

Kabal gets louder and more jovial, careful not to trip all over his long-ass legs

Naomi gets a little giggly and very talkative, will talk your ear off about the stars and bones and how you can see the future if you do this this and this under the full moon. Colm starts sobbing inconsolably

Which one rolls over in the morning to wake up the other one just to kiss them

Could be a delicate way for Zephi to say you need to leave my apartment

Naomi, but after letting Colm sleep for a while

Have they saved each other's lives before

Nope

Nah

Does one have an interest the other thinks is weird but wants to listen to it regardless

Zephi has to introduce Kabal into BDSM delicately so he realizes it's a bit more than just handcuffs

Colm might not quite get Naomi's psychic tendencies but he knows it's important to her and people haven't always believed her about it, so he will listen to whatever she has to say

Which one uses cropped hentai as reaction images

I don't think Kabal even crops it

-

Does one of them kinkshame the other

Kabal will let Zephi know of his limits but he never shames her

Naomi has no kinks, Colm is ace

Is one of them self-conscious about their body? If so how does the other comfort them

I don't know if either, Zephi is shy but fine about her body in general

Colm has the scar on his belly from that time his dad stabbed him he's uncomfortable about, Naomi just doesn't acknowledge it. He's not super comfortable being undressed anyways so just let him keep his clothes on and he's alright

What song do they listen to while going on a joyride

Kabal has a whole playlist of dad rock and synths for his hours-long drives

What kinda joyrides do they go on? Relaxing ones or wild ones?

Relaxing for Kabal at least, excitement for Zephi when he moves on the highway and speeds up

Do people ever get annoyed of their PDA

Herah gets annoyed at Kabal for breathing but otherwise not really? They don't really show it anyways

Never, it's just cute.

Would they live in the city or the country

It's whatever for Kabal. He'd be going on a long ride nowhere anyways

They live a bit outside the village proper, more quiet which they prefer

Are either of them mentally ill, if so how do they help one another cope

I don't think so? Zephi is just shy.

Colm is a mess of PTSD and general anxiety, Naomi is just weird otherwise but she's very quiet, calming and comforting so if Colm wants to talk she's always available to listen and if he wants to be alone she'll make sure he's fed/warm/dry at least

Does one have a spot on them where they would melt when the other kisses them there

Inner thighs, neck almost behind the ear, throat when his head is bent back for Kabal

Naomi lives for cheek and forehead kisses (and kisses on the mouth), Colm likes kisses on his head

Do they dance together

They could hit a club, sure. Kabal is not super good at it, but passable

Hum a song and sway together at home, if real happy maybe even do a little dance at a bonfire party

Do they sing together

I could see them (or at least Kabal) belting out a tune in the kitchen or something when there's a good song on the radio

Sometimes, one starts humming and the other one joins

Which one is better at cooking than the other and makes most the dinners

Zephi is probably better, Kabal sustains himself on fast food mainly

They both kinda suck. Colm can grill a pheasant on a firepit but that's about it, and Naomi can chop up a cucumber and put some leaves on top. Mahran teaches them how to make the basic casserole before they starve

Are they a reckless couple or safe

Bordering on reckless?

Very safe

What be they kinks and do they try each other's kinks

Kabal isn't aversed to milfs and femdom but Zephi had him topped (hee hee) with bondage. The rougher stuff he will need to be eased into but he's always open for new experiences

Their kinks are Love and Care and Pants On Hugging

What would be their Valentine's gifts be to each other

A bouquet, some candy and a pack of condoms from Kabal

If they knew what it was, a good dinner and flowers.

Do they get into fights often? If so, what do they fight over and how do they make up?

They're not really in a serious enough relationship to have fights

They don't fight

Which one's top, bottom, verse

Both verses, but when Zephi tops she tops hard

What kinda sex they be having

If Kabal gets to pick, just... regular with a touch of rough. If Zephi gets to pick, he's screaming for mercy by the end

If Colm's ace ass is even in the mood it's lights off shirts on missionary

Who would fight in honor for the other if someone would insult them

Kabal would get mad if someone insulted Zephi, he wouldn't immediately throw hands but he'd be very vocal like hey, apologize to the lady

Don't get Colm angry the guy knows blood magics he doesn't have full control over

Do they want kids

Naaaaah. Kabal has a grown up daughter whom he adores and who's the light of his life, but he doesn't want more nor does Zephi

Yeah and they have a couple!

#colm is a very sensitive boy. #long oc thing #but like if herah hears zephi complain about kabal even once she will call a hitman

[muwur]

long distance headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for daichi, suga, hinata & tsukki

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.5k words

a/n: hello yall this is my first post! nobody asked, but i just started this haikyuu reader insert blog, feel free to check my page n see wazzap. also requests are open pls come fhorfjepfiwf;

daichi

✧ after high school, he stayed in miyagi while you went to tokyo, about 5 hours away, for college

✧ texting or calling whenever u can!

✧ you be like “heyyy”

✧ then he clap back with a “go focus on your lecture”

✧ “im not in lectureee”

✧ “you gave me your schedule so i know you’re in the middle of class”

✧ “...”

✧ makes sure you’re awake on time for your classes and calls you if he thinks you’re oversleeping (and hes usually right, this man just KNOWS)

✧ “morning y/n, i think you need to get to class soon”

✧ “mmrghhhghhh” *checks time* “holy sHI-- i forgot to set my alarm. IMMA BE LATE. THANKS DAICHI I LOVE YOU ILL TALK TO YOU LATER BYE”

✧ definitely skips out on some nights out with his friends to video chat you. you catch up, talk about future plans, reminisce, complain about not being able to hug one another, etc. occasionally one of you falls asleep on call, particularly after a long day or week. if he sleeps, you make sure you screenshot his sleeping face and start a picture collection  

✧ you hit him up when you get drunk lMAO

✧ “daiichiii, i miss youuu, i needdd youuuu AND i needa peeee---” “hey daichi, this is y/n’s friend. y/n’s pretty out of it now but they’ll be okay! we’re heading back to our place right now” “im gonna pEE IN THIS CAR”

✧ daichi coordinates with your friends to make sure you arrive home safely, use the bathroom, and get tucked into bed. he thanks the universe you have good friends. if it weren’t for them he’d probs have a heart attacc. sends you cute, reassuring voice messages for you to wake up to the next morning with hangover tips he learned from suga

✧ always checks in with you throughout the day, every day. able to pick up on the slightest hints if you’re feeling unwell and calls you immediately to try to make you feel better

✧ makes plans to visit you! you get really excited to introduce him to your college friends (who, after meeting him, tell you not only is he a hottie but is such a kind guy, fosho a keeper. they also ask if he has any cute friends)

✧ either holding your hand or has an arm around you most of the time.

✧ you spend all day together outside and wandering the city, then spend the night back at your place (sorry roommate, but we’re gonna have to kick you out for a lil bit--)    

sugawara

✧ you finally secured a job! unfortunately, the company required you to work for a year at their main facility, which was a 4 hour drive away from miyagi

✧ if suga wasn’t needed in miyagi for his teaching job, he would’ve tried to come with you

✧ after unloading your things in your new apartment and before parting ways, suga was like

✧ “everything’s unloaded everything from the car?”

✧ “yes maam”

✧ “do you have enough snacks?”

✧ “we just went to the grocery hun”

✧ “did you bring enough underwear?”

✧ “gDI yEs I dID”

✧ “:c promise to call me often”

✧ “<3333 of course”</p>

✧ good morning texts before y’all leave for work! you send each other cute pictures when you’re getting ready for the day (suga with bedhead, brushing his teeth? suga with his tie half done?? sign me up)

✧ always texts you when something reminds him of you, usually sends a picture along with it

✧ “the store was having a special on oranges today! this one reminds me of you”

✧ “why”

✧ “it just looks so cute~”

✧ will immediately call you if you send him any sort of message that worries him

-“hello? y/n what’s wrong, why is there blood?? speak to me, you haven’t replied in 5 minutes”

✧ “ohhh my bad, i’m just cleaning up don’t worry! i didn’t explain, but the picture i sent you isn’t blood, it’s ketchup i spilled on myself lolol”

✧ poor man nearly fainted from worry

✧ would pay you a surprise visit, making sure to plan it carefully so he knew you weren’t busy with work or plans. brings you gifts of your favorite snacks and a scarf that matches one of his own for the upcoming winter

✧ plans out that weekend for y’all, mans did his research beforehand. together, you toured the city and the surrounding nature, took lots of selfies (and many candids of you), and taste tested lots of foods before returning to your apartment and collapsing into your bed with exhaustion

✧ but y’all not too tired for cuddling n a lil something else >.>

hinata

✧ sure, being a couple hours away was hard for some... but y’all in different countries right now

✧ calls you immediately when there’s any inconvenience that occurs in his life, no matter how minor, thinking you’ll know how to fix it (or at least give him the reassurance he needs)

✧ “hey y/n...”

✧ “what’s wrong? you sound worried”

✧ “i broke my bike, what do i do”

✧ “you what? are you alright?? how? where are you? it’s midnight there, honey”

✧ “i was biking back to my apartment after staying late to practice! i didn’t wanna hit this turtle, so i swerved into a pole and now my bike’s wrecked :**”

✧ “ahh, are you okay?? you’re not hurt are you :(”

✧ “no, im okay... but im tired and i have two miles to go ;(((”

✧ “;( im sorry babe but you gotta walk home. we’ll get you a new bike. ill stay on the phone with you until you get back. tell me about your day <3″</p>

✧ talks about you all the time to his friends! introduces you through video chat to them! “look how pretty and cute y/n is!”

✧ together you work out your time differences and busy schedules so you can chat whenever possible

✧ he lets you know whenever he bought something for you, but never shows it to you because he’s excited to see your reaction in person when you reunite

✧ always asks you to send him pictures of yourself, he wants to see what you look like everyday he’s missing you in real life

✧ you surprise visit HIM. he’s so happy he could cry. shows you around every place he loves, shows you off to everyone he knows, holds your hand the entire time and never wants to let go, is practically glued to you not that you mind  

✧ you spend your last night together lying in the grass, hand in hand, looking at the stars and sharing sweet kisses  

tsukishima

✧ y’all went to separate universities. while he stayed relatively close to miyagi, you went across the country to okinawa, which was about a 3 hour flight away

✧ he sees all the couples around campus n becomes lowkey bitter, texts you immediately about gross pda like hand holding that he secretly wishes he could do with you “these people in relationships are too happy, i didn’t ask to see them gawk at each other all day” “u just miss me lmao”

✧ once overheard a convo on a shuttle at school that went like :

✧ person 1: “ugh, he’s so cute”

✧ person 2: “why dont you go out with him??”

✧ person 1: “i dunno, his dorm’s down the street, i can’t really do long distance”

✧ nANI (by the way, this is a irl conversation my friend overheard, oml)

✧ tsukki nearly choked on his morning coffee

✧ bothers texts you in class bc he’s bored and in need of your attention

✧ “hey tsukki this prof’s lectures are rlly dense, i needa focus, ill text u after”

✧ “but arent i more interesting than rocks”

✧ “trust me, id even rather watch some dino documentaries with you than be here”

✧ *read*

✧ likes to chat with you most nights as he lies in bed before going to sleep, staring up at the dark ceiling and listening to your voice through his headphones. usually just talking about how your days went (as if you weren’t texting all day) or just casual talk and banter

✧ you remind him to make sure he’s taking care of himself and eating well

✧ “who are you? my mother?”

✧ “no but you’re about to be single”

✧ surprise visits you, tells you it was yamaguchi’s idea when it was really his own and yamaguchi was just teasing him about it  

✧ you show him around the city, sharing what you know about its rich history and culture. you visit most areas you both wanted to see before calling it a day

✧ your roommate conveniently spends that night over at their friend’s they just wanna give you alone time, which y’all very much needed. you make it a note to repay your roommate somehow.

✧ sweet lovin that he’s been missing, then some spooning as you sleep    

a/n: just wanna tackle these about 4 characters at a time but if u wanna see this headcanon w/ other characters feel free to hmu w/ an ask <3<b> also sorry if i text type a lot and that im inconsistent with my apostrophes, let me know if that’s something you want me to fix! 

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #daichi x reader #sugawara x reader #hinata x reader #tsukishima x reader #daichi sawamura #sugawara koushi x reader #hinata shoyo x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #sugawara koushi #hinata shoyo #tsukishima kei

[moonlightchn]

𝖂𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖜𝖔𝖑𝖛𝖊𝖘, 𝖜𝖔𝖑𝖛𝖊𝖘

and basic shit you should know before interacting I guess~

*Disclaimer: all the information this post contains will be based on things I’ve learned over the years and my personal modifications are NOT to be taken as the general rule. This is MY abo concept for this bot in particular. Yall are free to agree, disagree, take ideas, adapt to your own bot, etcetcetc. Bye. Also sorry this doesn't have a read more;;;; I tried :(

Hello, this is (not) JYPe,

and welcome to the first episode of “Admin’s abo concept isn’t probably what you think so we gonna go in dept on this shit hehe ”. This was originally going to be a one part documentary but I realized I would probably keep coming up with or remembering stuff and these would be so LOOONG so I decided to just do it as I go and I’ll use the hashtag “admins abo tmi ” for this yeah. But also remember you can ask questions if you have any or if you don’t understand something because I usually ramble a lot.

Today we’ll be talking about 3 things that seem to be the most important since they’re the most brought up on my RP’s and they are:

Turning/Transforming.

Heat vs Rut.

Mates.

So let’s begin!

🌙 𝕿𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌/𝕿𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖌…

There’s two meanings to this concept, one is the concept of turning from human form to wolf form, and the other one is being transformed into a wolf by different means (these usually depends on which story you’ve heard, it can be being the 7th boy child in a family, it can be a bite or a scratch, it can be eating raw meat, etcetcetc).

*This change has now also been added to the Chan’s pack introduction.

What are the definitions of this words? Cambridge Dictionary defines them as:

Turn: to (cause to) become, change into, or come to be something.

Example: “Chan turned into his wolf form”

Explanation: Chan, already a werewolf, turned and changed into his wolf form.

Transform: to change completely the appearance or character of something or someone, especially so that that thing or person is improved.

Example: “Changbin was transformed into a werewolf.”

Explanation: Changbin, a regular human, was transformed /by a wolf/ into a werewolf.

𝕿𝖚𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌…

In the classic folklore, turning consists of 2 phases, human with NO wolf characteristics whatsoever, (which is what makes it so hard finding out who the werewolf in town is) and fluffy wolf with some human like characteristics (being biped, having arms instead of four legs, body structure humanlike. The best examples I can think of are the underworld lycans mmm tasteful). Another general rule for classic werewolves was that the person and wolf were two different minds, the person never remembered turning and had no idea they were the werewolf terrorizing town. While being human, the person didn’t even have the wolf skills like hearing or strength. They were just regular boring humans. Another thing was that they had no control whatsoever and ONLY turned during full moon, but I’m not getting into that yet.

Here are some examples (it’s basically furries oop).

Moving on to my concept, I decided to have 3 phases of turning, consisting on:

Human: Basic, simple, boring human. No presence of wolf features whatsoever. YET they can still make use of their skills such as sensitive hearing, smell, extra strength among others.

Half-turn: Heavily inspired by Teen Wolf tbh, SOME features are present and can generally be controlled, such as eyes, ears, tail, fangs, claws. Can even be confused for hybrids. (sumn like this please appreciate my art)

Full-turn: they become big scary fluffy puppies. Let’s remember how they look like.

Channie Chan Chris

𝕿𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖌…

As mentioned before, transforming depends on which story you know and what you’re settling for. Generally we always talk about bites and deep scratches. Some of the most known stories about how to become a werewolf are being the 7th boy child born in a family on a full moon, or in Greek mythology, Zeus transformed some dudes into wolves after they tried to feed him human meat. There’s many different stories you can pick from, they’re just one Google away~

On my concept, though, the only way to transform is through a bite, even though I always keep options open.

I will probably be talking about the 3 types of wolves and deepening this a bit more later on.

🌙 𝕳𝖊𝖆𝖙 𝖛𝖘 𝕽𝖚𝖙.

Imma give you a wolf biology class because I know too much useless info and I WANT TO.

Rut: The rut is the mating season of certain mammals. The rut is characterized in males by an increase in testosterone, exaggerated sexual dimorphisms and increased aggression and interest in females.

Heat: The estrous cycle or oestrous cycle is the set of recurring physiological changes that are induced by reproductive hormones in most mammalian therian females. Estrous cycles start after sexual maturity in females and are interrupted by anestrous phases or by pregnancies. This cycle presents four phases, the one known as “heat” being the second one, estrus or oestrus, that refers to the phase when the female is sexually receptive.

What are seasonal breeders and what is mating season?

The breeding season is when seasonal breeders reproduce. Seasonal breeders are animal species that successfully mate only during certain times of the year. These times of year allow for the optimization of survival of young due to factors such as ambient temperature, food and water availability etcetc. Male seasonal breeders may exhibit changes in testosterone levels, weight, and fertility depending on the time of year. Female seasonal breeders will have one or more estrus cycles only when she is “in season” or fertile and receptive to mating.

Wolves fall in all of these descriptions.

What does all of this shit mean and why do I care lmao?

This means that if this was a logical bot I should only be doing NSFW like one week during 4 months a year LMAO no frfr

This basically means that RUT and HEAT are the seasons when the MALE and FEMALE respectively are ready to mate with each other to reproduce.

I’ve seen many male idol hybrids having heats instead of ruts, which I have no problem at all with and am sure no one else does really, but I think you should KNOW that a heat would not make them want to fuck, but get fucked. Heat would be the need to be filled and not fill others. A heat and a rut does NOT have to equal dominance or submissiveness in bots, anyway, that would be like saying being top or bottom determines who is dom/sub and that’s wrong, so just a PSA I guess.

Now, how does this affect my CB and ABO concept?

I’ve never, anyway, read anywhere of classic werewolves reproduction, which leads me to believe that they’re probably sterile. So I will stick to real life wolves rules but on my own way. Wolves are even monogamous and I dont go by that one lmao.

Reproduction rules on my ABO are really simple, ruts are once a month, around 5 days, and each of the guys have different characteristics for them. They’re only capable of getting someone pregnant during ruts, too. I just generally believe all girls are on the pill tbh and I never really use condoms but guys irl please practice safe sex wrap your or your partners willy before going freaky and stay safe.

Not sure if there’s something else to mention here? Let me know.

🌙 𝕸𝖆𝖙𝖊𝖘…

Mates are the wolf equivalent of soulmates, but that’s bullshit. I mean, I’m not gonna say they’re not real, I just mean that the general idea of only one person for the rest of your life and if it’s not them you’re miserable is dumb when we’re talking about beings with feelings. Did you know wolves irl are monogamous and mate but if their mate dies they just look for another one and move on? Now you know.

The thing with mates and marks, in my humble opinion, is that they don’t mean anything. Peoples hearts change, feelings come and go, and my wolves are NOT about to drop everything they have for some person they don’t know who happened to be their true mate. In fact, Channie is the only one who believes in them. The mates issue is a bit complex if we think about it over each of the Chan’s, but on a general idea, the mates are not exclusive for the guys, and I’ll probably make a tmi on the boys at some point, but Chan met his mate and it didn’t work out, for example. Mates go further than the marking, btw, mates are a special, cosmic bond. Marks are just that, marks.

And talking about that, we do not vibe with marks. The original folklore states marks as the way a wolf has to claim their partner as theirs and keep away others, especially from an alpha, and they’re supposed to go both ways, so marks between human/wolf, for example wouldn’t be possible. There’s also two marks.

The first bonding mark is generally given during sex between mates and heals, and the second one in front of the pack (there’s a whole social status thing involved here but were not touching that yet) and its permanent. Also marks are literal WOLF BITES so no, they’re neither small nor cute. Just look at these teethies and picture the scar in a neck-shoulder. That’s your bonding mark.

(they're cute tho I uwuuu)

What I’ve been reading around in fanfics and seeing around is that bots have been mated and claimed with marks, which is ok if you’re into that. My chan’s, though, find physical marks archaic, possessive and toxic. And honestly I personally do too.

You may have noticed by now that even though the boys are quite possessive, they’re never trying to scare away others and their sole way of marking is love marks that heal eventually and scenting. Permanent marks are a nono.

They will NOT mark anyone as their mate. Especially Channie plz he’s baby.

This is a personal decision and it does not mean that marking is RIGHT or WRONG. I just personally see marking bites as marking your partner with fire or something and I dislike the idea a lot.

ALRIGHT I THINK THAT’S ABOUT IT FOR TODAY I FEEL LIKE I WROTE TOO MUCH ALREADY??? Feel free to ask questions or request certain topics! I think next topics will be Social Structure, Skills and maybe Self control or Moon Cycles.

If you read all of this WOW CONGRATS??? I LOVE YOU EXTRA MUAH

One question I got on the asks was “since their fur color seems to correspond with their hair color, what happens if they dye their hair?”

Nothing happens babe! When they’re half turned they will have really funny colorful hair, but when they fully turn their fur stays the same! hehe Don’t worry, Chan won’t be a clown red wolf heh

OK BYE MUAH MUAH

Tags (hmu for removal:] if you don’t care about this hehe)

@yandereminholee @bunjihyo @shinhaneul-oc @sub-chungha @song-mingi-cb @grungeyuta @yourhwaa @bunny-woong @princess-yeji @xash-axx @7deadlysins-chan @camgirl-jihyeon @hybrid-wooyoung @vampirehhj @ghoulxbaekhyun @mafiaxnct127 @deadly-skz-gods-cb @mafia-chaeyoung @vampiresanha @sub-minho @starsirah-oc @femboy-minho @subbyhyunjinchatbot @weeb-wonwoo @yandere-wendy @musiclovermino @galaxy-ateez @chanlix-koalas @vampirechangbinnie @mafiafelixlee @madmanwoodam @sweetandsleepyjamie @yanderedahyun @hunter-chaeyoung @hwangyeji-cb @artsydahyun @gamer-yeji @yourminju @seulgi-foxy @kittensua-cb @softbabieinnie @softboyfriend-cb @iceskater-sana @irregularchatbot @yandere-miya @doll-seungmin @skz-cb @subbylino @babie-sanie

#admins abo tmi

[supremesukuna]

Part 2 of Jedi!Reader please? Maybe Jealous!Mando and uhh.. Smut (maybe) lmao I'm sorry

"So I’ve had this idea floating around in my head for the past couple of days. Could you write something where the reader just randomly gets kissed by someone and mando gets super jealous because he wants to be able to kiss them? I love your writing so much! It always makes my day when you post something 🥰"

Hope you dont mind that I put these two together! This was getting a bit long so the smut will have to wait until part 3 😅

part one

***

"I'll go and get the supplies. You wait here. I'm not sure how long this will take, so don't wander off." Din informed you.

You nodded. "I'll keep myself busy here." You smiled as you looked across the square of the little town you had stopped in. There was a small market which you could occupy yourself with.

You had taken your time looking across the various fruits, trinkets and foods for sale, many of which you had not seen before. You didn't have any credits on you to purchase anything, which had you kicking yourself, as you had already seen about 8 items you wanted to buy.

You were snapped out of your daze when you heard a familiar voice call your name. You turned to see who the voice belonged to.

"Tarver?" You questioned, a smile overtaking your face. "Is that really you?"

You rushed towards him and pulled him into a hug. He was an old friend of yours, you had both trained together and fought against the Galactic Empire together. You hadn't seen him since the fall of the Empire, when all the Jedi scattered.

"What brings you here?" He asked, his smile equally as bright.

"Just stocking up on supplies. You?"

"I live here. Moved here after our final battle."

"Have you seen anyone else? I haven't seen any of our Jedi friends for years!"

"A few, a lot of people pass through here."

"Prime spot for travellers I'm guessing?"

"Correct."

You continued catching up, talking about your old memories, your current lives, your future plans. It was comforting to have a reminder of where you had come from, it reminded you of how far you'd come, and how much your life had improved since choosing to travel with Din.

"I best let you go about your day."

You nodded in agreement. "If we don't go now, we'll be here all day." You joked. "See you soon, yeah? I'm sure I'll come this way again."

"See you too!" He leaned forward, which caused you to instinctively pull away. "Come on, you know I can't not kiss you."

You laughed, "you make it sound so romantic." You knew it was far from that.

Tarver came from a community who kissed friends and acquaintances goodbye, it was seen as offensive to avoid it. You had made many jokes about it in the past.

"Ugh fine. Make it quick. I don't want your germs." You joked, easily falling back into your old routines.

"Always so polite."

He leant towards you, pressing a quick kiss on your lips. You let him, but didn't pass up the opportunity to fake gag.

"That felt like kissing a sibling." You overreacted.

"Blame my ancestors for putting it into our etiquette."

"Curse you!" You waved your fist at the sky, causing the two of you to double over in laughter.

A sudden tight grip on your arm snapped you out of it. You looked up, seeing Din.

"Oh hi." You didn't bother to hide your surprise. That was much quicker than you expected.

"We need to go."

He didn't give you a chance to respond, moving his grip to your wrist and pulling you along, forcing you to fall in step behind him.

You yelled a quick bye over your shoulder, before concentrating on keeping up with Din's quick steps. Your heart was hammering in your chest. Something had really worried or annoyed him, hence your quick getaway, so you kept an eye out for any suspicious activity. Perhaps you had been followed to the little town, or Din had bumped into trouble.

But you only grew more confused when there was no sign of any commotion or any sight of people spying or trying to follow you. You couldn't sense anyone nearby either. It was when you had exited the town and started down the route back to the Razor Crest that you voiced your confusion.

"Din, can you please tell me what's going on? Are we in danger?"

"No." He responded, his tone clipped. Din's footsteps did not get any slower, nor his grip any looser.

"Then why are you so quick to leave?" You tried to pull your wrist away, but he didn't let up.

"Let's just go."

You dug your heels into the ground, forcing him to stop. Din swung round to face you, his posture showing annoyance.

"I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me what happened." He had a habit of hiding things from you, thinking it protected you, but it only made you ill prepared for when you inevitably ran into trouble. You had repeatedly asked him to start being more open, but knew it was difficult for someone so used to travelling alone.

He sighed loudly, tugging your arm, but you wrenched it away from his grip, crossing your arms.

"Stop being awkward. Let's go." Din stepped forward to reach for you again, but you took a step back.

"No, not unless you start being honest with me. What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"Then why are you acting so odd? Something must have happened for you to be so rattled."

"I'm not... rattled." He didn't sound convincing at all.

"Well you're something."

"You wandered off. I told you not to do that."

Now he was making excuses. "You told me to make myself busy while you got our supplies. I stayed near to where you were, so don't blame this on me."

He didn't say anything, and an awkward silence fell over the two of you. You scraped your boots against the ground, waiting for him to explain, but he stayed silent.

"Please just be honest with me." You half begged.

"Who were you speaking to?"

You were taken aback by his question, and his unnecessarily rough tone. "Someone I know."

"Someone you know?" He repeated.

"Yes." You spoke slowly, unsure what he was getting at.

"You know them well?"

"Define well?" You had no idea what an earth he was on about.

"Well enough to-" he stopped himself, but you knew now what he was getting at.

"To what?" You were visibly annoyed now, realising what he was probably getting at. But he didn't need to act like such a child.

"You know what."

"So you're spying on me now."

"If you won't be honest then I'll have to."

"How have I not been honest?!" Your voice raised in annoyance.

"Keep your voice down. And how can I keep you safe if you run off with other men?" He regretted what he said once it was out of his mouth, not realising how bad it sounded until it was too late.

"Seriously? Din, what the hell?" You sounded genuinely hurt, at it made his chest ache.

"I didn't mean that to sound so... accusing."

"Well it did." You tried not to sound so offended, but failed.

You continued, explaining yourself to stop him thinking the worst. "He's a friend, I trained with him. We were Padawans together. And if you'd just asked me instead of assuming everything, you would know that."

"...And the kiss?" His own insecurity caused him to ask. It's not like he was able to do that with you whenever he pleased. You'd never openly discussed what your relationship was prior to this moment, but you both knew there was an unspoken thing between the two of you.

"Din, it was nothing. It's a weird etiquette thing from his home planet."

"To kiss people on the mouth?"

"Yes." You were exasperated. "Honestly, he'd probably try to kiss you if I introduced you." It sounded ridiculous out of context. You reached for his hand, knowing that your touch helped ground him. "Din please believe me." You looked up at him.

"I believe you."

He hated how upset you looked, especially as it was his fault. You were blaming yourself for his own insecurity.

"I didn't mean to upset you." His voice was soft, trying to remove the hurt expression currently dominating your features.

You took a deep breath, but Din didn't miss how shaky it was. "It's fine. I get that this-" you gestured between the two of you "-is different for you, and for me as well. I wasn't thinking."

Din's chest felt heavy at your response. You were so good, always thinking of him over yourself. Even when he was most arguably in the wrong, you were the one apologising.

"Don't apologise. I overreacted."

"No you didn't."

Din cupped your face, forcing you to look at him. "Yes I did. I shouldn't have done that. I got jealous and stopped thinking straight. It's not your fault."

"Jealous?" You tilted your head questioningly, a gesture you'd unconsciously picked up from Din.

"I..." He hesitated.

"It's okay. You can tell me." You encouraged him gently. Your tummy was doing somersaults at his unspoken confession.

"I... care about you. And I like having you around. It's nice. I would hate for you to leave."

"Din, I would never leave you. Why would you think that?"

He shifted uncomfortably, and you realised he'd probably opened up more than he had done to most people. Discussing insecurities out in the open would not be at all easy or comfortable for him.

You approached him and wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your head on his chest. You pulled him towards you, squeezing tightly.

"I care about you too. And I love being with you. Please don't ever worry about me leaving. I would never."

"I know."

"You're all I have, you know? And the kid." You reassured.

His chin rested on top of your head, his arms wrapping around your back just as tightly as yours were around him. His hands felt warm against your back, and you loved having him so close, despite his beskar armour not being the most huggable material in the world.

"We can go back to the ship if you want to?" You asked.

"Okay."

You went to pull away but he kept one arm wrapped securely around you as you fell in step side by side, your own arm around his waist.

***

part three coming soon!

#mando x reader #mando oneshot #mando one shot #mando requests #din djarin x reader #din djarin requests #din djarin oneshot #din djarin one shot #the mandalorian requests #the mandalorian one shot #the mandalorian x reader

[yeoldontknow]

catch up tag 🌸

tagged by beautiful angels @chillingtae and @yoonia to do this catch up tag. thank you so much loves! i hope you guys are having a happy friday <3 <3

1. what do you prefer to be called name-wise?

kat is fine! i introduce myself to people as kat. if youre using my full name youre either upset with me or a member of my family lmao

2. when is your birthday?

jan 23

3. where do you live?

nyc

4. three things you are doing right now?

working (waiting for one of my systems to load which has been bogged down and super slow lately), listening to my spotify release radar (which is....not great today im disappointed), mentally drafting lines and description for the next hero chapter as im in the mood to write today but im absolutely not in a romantic place lmao

5. four fandoms that have peaked your interest?

uhhh ill list fandoms ive written fanfic for! kpop (obviously), merlin, muse, and supernatural (but like really specifically supernatural seasons 2-5)

6. how has the pandemic been treating you?

i mean....50/50. my company is amazing and i know im super privileged. ive been working from home since the end of february and corporate have been extremely generous (giving us additional time off, mental health days, extending summer fridays until end of 2021, compensating for home office needs, restructuring work from home policies to accommodate parents). i got a bonus in june in place of my raise due to financial tensions but was confirmed for another promotion next year - even was offered a new job, literally straight offered didnt even need to interview, to create my own team in a different department. i have a roof over my head and food on my table. my family is healthy, my parents are retired and safe. like...im so so so grateful.

mentally and emotionally and creatively...i am struggling. a lot of my inspiration for fics comes from being out in the city and observing people and their interactions. even architecture inspires me. the act of moving through a city inspires nearly all of my fics (like..i think everyone can sense that lmao asas is in london, light sakura is tokyo, all quiet is movement through spaces, hero was inspired by a building in harlem). not having that kind of motion and observation has made writing really hard. and also just...the news and the onslaught of hyper-reality. its been utterly daunting and ive found myself completely burned out more this year than ever before. usually my burnout hits during new years or the holidays. ive spent part of summer and part of autumn and literally all of november just...vacant.

so yeah. 50/50

7. a song you can’t stop listening to?

Flexibility of Mind - GRoost

8. recommend a movie?

Summer Wars (2009, hosoda mamoru)

9. how old are you?

31

10. school, university, occupation, other?

currently employed at a major company in the arts & entertainment industry

11. do you prefer heat or cold?

cold!!!! its so easy to warm up and bundle. who doesnt love cozy socks and hoodies and slippers <3 <3 its so hard for me to cool down in the summer and i hate sweating lmao

12. name one fact others may not know about you?

uhhh i worked in music supervision while getting my masters and the two degrees i have do not necessarily relate to the work i do now lmao

13. are you shy?

i can be. im definitely introverted and find other people to be way, way more interesting than i am. i enjoy listening to people talk about their passions and what interests them, and this also means that i dont say much or say anything at all about myself, really. im not usually the first person to engage in a group or even to introduce myself first to someone unless i get the sense there is someone uncomfortable (with the energy, the topic, the setting, etc) and then i will put myself in a position of leadership to make them feel safe

14. preferred pronouns?

she/her !

15. biggest pet peeves?

people who react rather than respond to criticism or confrontation; people who instigate drama; really loud groups of people on public transportation

16. what is your favorite ‘dere’ type?

i dont believe i have one

17. how would you rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be?

ill say like...8

18. what is your main blog?

this one - yeoldontknow

@yeoldontknowiread is for ficrecs

20. is there something people need to know about you before they become friends?

i can be pathologically secretive in that i dont really talk about myself or what my day has been like or what im up to unless something happens that is exciting or interesting. being an introvert also means that my regard for our friendship will define it as something sacred and i will likely be more devoted (though quietly so) than you might be if youre an extrovert. im really passionate about things and if i sense that you are not as passionate about those same things i will likely not bring them up again unless i feel like you want to hear about it. it might take me a while to respond to texts or messages, but it doesnt mean i love you less. there could be long periods of inactivity in our friendship but if someone else asks me about you i will say i love you and you are special to me and will call you a close friend even if its been years since weve last talked

tagging: @yehet-me-up @kyungseokie @jenmyeons @jamaisjoons @j-pping @yeolville @loeybeans @ditzymax @imdifferentshadesofpurple @red-exo @iris-somnia @inkedtae @yeojaa @hobi-gif @sahmfanficbts @snackhobi @delhyun @yutacrush @nunchiwrites @blackberrykai @kimtaehyunq @jiminiethot and anyone else who wants to do this. i know i tagged a lot of people but really i just want to check in on you and see how youre all doing. as always please only do so if you wish <3

#catch up tag

[sukirichi]

read the new chapters and aAAACKKKKK BESTIE???

y/n - ‘I was born to make everyone’s life a living hell’ maam this LINE?! JAW DROPPED, TIME STOPPED being insecure all her life and wanting to live up to the expectations to her dad just to have that sliver of attention from him, that sentence gives us a glimpse on how little she felt despite being accomplished, rather successful actually because she always cleans her boss’ mess have a lot of baggage to unpack. and when the secret was confirmed, her anger rejects all of the entity that ties with her past because both her parents deprived her for the things she was supposed to have– becoming greedy to fulfill those. then eventually, somehow, going back to her roots aka being humble after having the talk with her dad. As most of her insecurity started because of him and how she had to be the bigger person for his other family, clearing out the misunderstanding between them brought a sense of peace  while she’s settling in the restless turn of events.

and with our main man gojo, this guy, it is not wise to- 😤😤 how can you say you’re engaged after doing the body tango huh? esp when you said you want y/n to be your wife? oh gee and the revelation of his past relationship with mia and how he sees her in y/n is so fucked up. can’t help but think that satoru wanting to marry and be this lovey-dovey with y/n is just him reliving the moments that mia never gave him in the past. and y/n accepting that their current relationship is based on how they’re filling up the cracks in their needs and settling for the sake of familiarity. imagine how deep in love our girl is to keep satoru in her life 💔 im still in it for the second lead agenda

needless to say, everyone here needs a therapy so they can get their shit straight together 🤧🤧 (ノ•̀ o •́ )ノ ~ ┻━┻

BUT i know you mentioned this many times but laywer! naoya all poised and in his best behavior while helping y/n in her new situation has my heart go💕💕 winning lots of cases and is known in his field, he proved that he is both beauty and brains. and the pen spin??? man be pulling those fast spins either to distract or impress the person he is talking to flashing those perfect white pearls wtf now i can’t get that out of my head naoya brain rot 🥵🥵 also celebrity chef! sukuna in charge of all those delicious, exquisite cuisines? imma make myself broke just to taste his masterpiece🥲 ooh but how about him being a michelin star chef and owning a michelin-starred resto?! no doubt, left and right you see this man appearing on some high food magazine on the cover 😊😊 oh oh i also saw that supermodel! choso?? also his face is plastered on magazines AND luxurious advertisements ex. shibuya crossing! where most people be drenched in his glorious presence yea weird shibuya arc ref pls kill me and everyone talks how handsome and intimidating he is while he just have a rbf and only the closest people in his life get to see him drop that front 😌😌

with that in mind, imagine supermodel! choso being a godfather to the baby of y/n?? he would go soft immediately at the sight of the child and would probably love giving lots of branded clothes it will be good enough for more than a year ☺️🥲😭

oh and there is this one scene in chp7 that reminded me of the recent korean movie i watched i dont wanna say it in case you wanna check it out its called sweet and sour and oh god idk why but watching it, mind keeps on prompting your fics 😬😬 maybe bcos i some of your fic always had med related topics and the main actress role there is a nurse. i remember that you’re on your clinic training so maybe thats why 😳oohh pls don’t forget to take breaks and be safe heart and oh ur a psych major too? oh wow hi ig in relation to one actress in the sweet and sour fic, she was also in a kdrama the heirs- which was popular at the time with it being packed with some solid household actors and actresses. sky castle tho, ig it relates to the theme of reckless more because its mostly how parents from the upper class will mindlessly destroy someone’s life to attain their materialistic desires  🤧🙂

this fic, easily in my top 3 ‘heart belongs to who it dictates’ so many twists, so much drama and ANGST! YES BESTIE GIMME THOSE ANGST 🥲😌

i hope you’re doing well nowadays :’)) we need to find gege the best chiropractor to take care of his back, so good that it’ll make naoya respawn to life 🙂 suki i don’t think i’ll get tired of saying how much i love your work that it feels illegal im reading it for free 💔. i don’t really have much to offer, but im wishing you good health and success in your life :’)) aah i’ve mentioned this already but take care always 💕💖😊🥰

- 🍳

read the new chapters and aAAACKKKKK BESTIE???

y/n - ‘I was born to make everyone’s life a living hell’ maam this LINE?! JAW DROPPED, TIME STOPPED being insecure all her life and wanting to live up to the expectations to her dad just to have that sliver of attention from him, that sentence gives us a glimpse on how little she felt despite being accomplished, rather successful actually because she always cleans her boss’ mess have a lot of baggage to unpack. and when the secret was confirmed, her anger rejects all of the entity that ties with her past because both her parents deprived her for the things she was supposed to have– becoming greedy to fulfill those. then eventually, somehow, going back to her roots aka being humble after having the talk with her dad. As most of her insecurity started because of him and how she had to be the bigger person for his other family, clearing out the misunderstanding between them brought a sense of peace  while she’s settling in the restless turn of events.

and with our main man gojo, this guy, it is not wise to- 😤😤 how can you say you’re engaged after doing the body tango huh? esp when you said you want y/n to be your wife? oh gee and the revelation of his past relationship with mia and how he sees her in y/n is so fucked up. can’t help but think that satoru wanting to marry and be this lovey-dovey with y/n is just him reliving the moments that mia never gave him in the past. and y/n accepting that their current relationship is based on how they’re filling up the cracks in their needs and settling for the sake of familiarity. imagine how deep in love our girl is to keep satoru in her life 💔 im still in it for the second lead agenda

needless to say, everyone here needs a therapy so they can get their shit straight together 🤧🤧 (ノ•̀ o •́ )ノ ~ ┻━┻

BUT i know you mentioned this many times but laywer! naoya all poised and in his best behavior while helping y/n in her new situation has my heart go💕💕 winning lots of cases and is known in his field, he proved that he is both beauty and brains. and the pen spin??? man be pulling those fast spins either to distract or impress the person he is talking to flashing those perfect white pearls wtf now i can’t get that out of my head naoya brain rot 🥵🥵 also celebrity chef! sukuna in charge of all those delicious, exquisite cuisines? imma make myself broke just to taste his masterpiece🥲 ooh but how about him being a michelin star chef and owning a michelin-starred resto?! no doubt, left and right you see this man appearing on some high food magazine on the cover 😊😊 oh oh i also saw that supermodel! choso?? also his face is plastered on magazines AND luxurious advertisements ex. shibuya crossing! where most people be drenched in his glorious presence yea weird shibuya arc ref pls kill me and everyone talks how handsome and intimidating he is while he just have a rbf and only the closest people in his life get to see him drop that front 😌😌

with that in mind, imagine supermodel! choso being a godfather to the baby of y/n?? he would go soft immediately at the sight of the child and would probably love giving lots of branded clothes it will be good enough for more than a year ☺️🥲😭

oh and there is this one scene in chp7 that reminded me of the recent korean movie i watched i dont wanna say it in case you wanna check it out its called sweet and sour and oh god idk why but watching it, mind keeps on prompting your fics 😬😬 maybe bcos i some of your fic always had med related topics and the main actress role there is a nurse. i remember that you’re on your clinic training so maybe thats why 😳oohh pls don’t forget to take breaks and be safe heart and oh ur a psych major too? oh wow hi ig in relation to one actress in the sweet and sour fic, she was also in a kdrama the heirs- which was popular at the time with it being packed with some solid household actors and actresses. sky castle tho, ig it relates to the theme of reckless more because its mostly how parents from the upper class will mindlessly destroy someone’s life to attain their materialistic desires  🤧🙂

this fic, easily in my top 3 ‘heart belongs to who it dictates’ so many twists, so much drama and ANGST! YES BESTIE GIMME THOSE ANGST 🥲😌

i hope you’re doing well nowadays :’)) we need to find gege the best chiropractor to take care of his back, so good that it’ll make naoya respawn to life 🙂 suki i don’t think i’ll get tired of saying how much i love your work that it feels illegal im reading it for free 💔. i don’t really have much to offer, but im wishing you good health and success in your life :’)) aah i’ve mentioned this already but take care always 💕💖😊🥰

- 🍳

y/n becomes a real baddie when she’s pissed off 😫

hmm y/n wasn’t really working hard for her dad’s attention, it was more like she felt so left out and unwanted (she feels unwanted wherever she goes) that she just decided to pack up and support them from afar bcos to her, she’s so alienated in her dad’s family that she felt like she had to work hard to earn a spot in their table. she knows she’s the outsider but she wants to feel like she can be part of them, that she is also a child deserving of love and care, but becos her stepmom focused more on her actual kids and her own dad was too busy with his new family now, it made y/n feel that she had to do something to be worthy of that.

that’s why most of the money she made working in tokyo was still wired to her family; she put her brothers in school and supported them, all because she hoped it would make them accept her more. now, things are different because she finally found her biological family, but even if valeria and co. still don’t want her, y/n is now more focusing on building something that’s truly hers that no one can take away. yes yes, she did become greedy, but more for power than of acceptance. she got to a point she doesn’t care as much vying for her parents’ approval and now thinks her luxury gives her comfort; only because at least she has that much. like she said in the latest chapter, happiness was not what she needed, it was stability and money - all things she lacked before.

and yea she did go back to her roots! all of her issues started with her dad anyway but that part is slowly patching up 🩹💔 oooh actually your theory is right bestie 🧐 gojo found y/n interesting bcos she reminded him of mia, so the more she pushed him away, the more he’s like wait, i’ve been here before, let’s not repeat past mistakes but i can do better now. on the part where gojo talked to mia while she was asleep, notice how he said he’s given a second chance to do better now, all because he couldn’t do them with mia but he could with y/n.

ohhh actually y/n was the one who established that ‘fulfilling mutual need and settling for familiarity instead of being lonely’ type of relationship. gojo avoided her for weeks and he’s pretty settled in keeping his distance, but she was the one who sought him out. deep down, y/n is afraid if she doesn’t at least use him as an anchor to her more humble roots, then she might spiral out of control and end up like valeria, thus using him as a ‘distraction’ but in reality, she needs his comfort to be grounded.

SECOND LEAD AGENDA OMG LETS GOOO 🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️🏃🏻‍♀️ geto the fine fine option.

NO BESTIE MOMENT U MENTIONED LAWYER NAOYA I JUST KNEW I WAS GONNA SCREAM. okay but lawyer! naoya is so fine, i love his character so much bcos he’s a pure bean. originally, i was gonna make him an antagonist but i found he had more potential as a good, supportive character. HIS PEN SPIN HELPPP WHY COULDN’T HE JUST BEEN OUR BABY DADDY 😫 he pulls them fast spins bcos he’s nervous btw HAHAHAHA y/n can be quite intimidating and lawyer! naoya is sometimes too precious.

celebrity chef! sukuna is MEAN! he was pictured after gordon ramsay so lmao. omgggg sukuna being famous not only for his food but also his handsomeness 😳 he gets so cocky over how no one can get in his level while popping a battle of champagne, listening to ‘careless whisper’ while dancing to his reflection in the mirror 😤

also yoo supermodel! choso is THE hot shit 🥵 he’s so famous his schedule is packed for an entire year and a half and those are just for very selected brands and designers! ugh imagine going to work on the subway when you see supermodel! choso with rbf posing sexily and you swoon because he’s so sexy. plot twist that choso doesn’t know how to drive bcos as a kamo family member, they grew up with drivers taking them to and fro, so when his driver got sick and everyone else was busy, supermodel choso takes the subway himself and hides behind a face mask and cap while still wearing extravagant clothes that makes him stand out more. he does not have ‘subtle’ on his book at all.

and yeah people say he’s intimidating but its more his height and build + rbf! in reality, he’s just as soft and sweet as naoya, but both of them go into protective mode when someone they care about is being crapped on. and boy when they DO get into “what did you just say?” mode, better run away 🏃🏻‍♀️ supermodel! choso is also an heir to the kamo empire though not after the business, but he still has enough power to take you down in a second.

meanwhile, lawyer! naoya didn’t become this successful without being so savage yet composed he makes you question your entire existence before he drags you to court. lawyer! naoya is so scarily convincing that he can make you plead guilty even tho you did nothing wrong 💀

aaaah omg supermodel! choso LOVES babies actually! as the eldest child who looked after his brothers bcos the kamo parents are always away for work, being a father figure is so natural to him. i can picture him being the one who cries harder than gojo if the baby is born bcos he’s so excited, then reads poems to the baby before sighing that childbirth is such a beautiful thing 🥺

omg i know sweet n sour, the actresses are one of my faves tho i haven’t watched it yet! oooh they’re a nurse? i didn’t know that 🧐 i actually finish my short training in a week so i’ll be heading on to heavy majoring in psychology! wait bestie are YOU also a psych major 😳💕 oh and i see i see, sky castle *jots that down for future references* reckless actually has lots of significance in terms of the parents’ roles so i’m excited to see that! and aww thank you so much, can’t believe i made it in someone’s top three 🥺💕

HELP AHSKWKW i’m gonna call the best chiropractor in the world and send them gege’s way, i’ll cry a river if that’s what it takes to bring my boo back to life 😭 and noo baby the support already means a lot to me, i’m just happy to indulge in my hobbies and share it wih you all so thank you very much for everything 🥺 please take care of yourself too n have a nice day!! kith MWAH 💕

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #series: reckless #jjk: manga spoilers #anon:🍳

[bunnyriviere]

my god i cant get my head out of this mess so imma rant, then MAYBE i can focus on my assignment like damn babe i thought your passion is stats, why are you obsessing over a guy that doesnt care enough. huh? care about stats instead babe!!!!!! i just want to only have to care about maths but i know my life is ruined if i dont have relationships, so i try. but i must suck at it so bad if everything just ends in flame like this, im so tired im teary eyes.

im on my phone and honestly dont know how to do the uh line to cut short the post so if anybody unfortunately see this im sr :(

this is not even about a romantic relationship, i dont even know why i just couldnt like a person like that but damn fine. this is about a male friend i made in grade 11 i guess. i have never liked men. im afraid of them and dont want to have to interact with them ever. i know its bad and i should change but i just really want them away from me im sorry..... so i wasnt even friendly with him, but i was polite, i know how to be a decent person. he was friendly and nice and friends to all which only made me think aw geez just stop being friendly i know this is not because you like me. but i was eating the snack he brought to class anytime he brought it without much thought cause he offered i aint gonna say no. all the while still not consider him a friend. not until a friend said im not being nice if im eating his food while still not seeing him as a friend. and i have always feel bad about not being friendlier towards men in general and he made the 1st move which made it easier for me to just go along. so i did and thats how we became friends.

hes really nice and i mean it. i think really highly of him. maybe its just me having bad luck so i havent met many that are nice?? i really believe they are just myth tbh, im about to settle for that thought. and this guy is really how i wish is the standard for all men. hes just that good, i have no complain. i truly like him and glad that my friend said something cause otherwise we probably wouldnt be friends.

again no romantic feeling. i just have to, remind the invisible audiences of this post i guess.

now we all know covid. and because of it, i couldnt come home and wanted to lay in bed even more than normal. so i didnt push for it when he said he couldnt meet anybody in the summer because he didnt want to accidently give somebody it. just saying that cause this is a 2 ways road right, nothing is ever only his fault, its also mine. i want to rant about my feelings but i dont want to dismiss any mistakes i made yk. so we didnt meet up then.

christmas came and before then we were talking about christmas gift and i didnt wanna any so i didnt prepare anything also. this person is too nice and i dont want him to feel bad. but anw i just thought maybe we can still meet up even if its not for gift exchanging. but i didnt ask or anything at all cause well, hes from here, he has family and friends that are definitely closer to him, and he had work. i know hes busy and if he wanna hang out he know where to find me. i just dont want to accidentally add something more onto his list of to do. he would be too nice to say no. and we are not that close i dont want to add more work for him. i dont have relatives or friends here other than him so im free anytime if he wanted to meet up. but that didnt happen, i dont think we talked at all. which fine i hate to admit but i was hurt. ugh hate showing how vulnerable i am. yuck. yikes. -100/10.

i just didnt think about it? i didnt try to reach out either so that was my fault too but just, if he didnt care then i wont either. so i really didnt think about him anymore.

came reading week! it really was 1 year from the last time i saw him honestly. he asked to meet up and if i want to go somewhere and tbh no im in the countryside rn is that the corect word so there are no place to go. but i remembered this 2ndhand place i like to go sometimes and i hadnt gone in a while so why not. so we agreed on that. and i know he was probably just tired, and there are people who sigh a lot, its not uncommon. but not seeing him for a long while and knowing this is a place i suggested, him doing that really made me feel bad. i probably shouldnt, but couldnt get the thought that he was probably doing this just because hes friendly not because hes friend with me. it fucking sucked. when we got out and he dropped me back at my home i still felt so bad he didnt get to enjoy himself so i asked if we could watch jojo together. yeah he loves jojo. i dont really care for anime im so sr i prefer realing manga lmao sr.

now ok maybe im still being dumb, probably. but tldr i truly believe people can be friends and affectionate even when they are from opposite sex. it didnt work out so well cause i got molested lmao cause some other guy thought that was cool to do. so that honestly worsen my uh wariness of men. but like i said, i think ive said it, i trust this person. honestly i do, we hug a lot and i had never felt afraid of it. i believe he wont do anything. im just really comfortable around him. so we cuddled while watching anime, that had happened before im really sr if you think thats wrong, i still believe that could happen.

but maybe its because i was tense from thinking he really didnt enjoy hanging out with me that much. i kept connecting remembering what the molester did and while i just knew i swear i knew he wouldnt do anything like that, i couldnt get it out of my head. i felt bad for that but there were just 2 things that happened so similar to what happened with the molester. haizz he kinda laced our fingers together but it wasnt handholding, same thing happened once before with m-dude and it felt weird but i didnt want to question that friendship so i didnt. and at some point of jojo i kinda jumped and he held me back, not pulled me back or anything but was holding me in place, and it was probably to make me feel safe but honestly if anybody even use a little bit of force i will just think of when i finally got the courage to turn around to confront the other dude for touching me, he held me back and i couldnt move at all. i think i froze a bit.

argh back to the main story. see how i totally suck? hahaha just blaming this friend for something somebody else did. im so sorry, i suck.

well after that we picked up talking again but idk! was it me overthinking? was it? because it felt like he didnt want to talk to me at all. it was, how to say it. he was friendly yes he talked hmm. damn how-- it felt like he didnt care for what i said. its a feeling idk how to put into words. and that sucks. he didnt seem interested in me before, felt happy enough when we cuddled, then back to being uninterested. i knew i know he doesnt want me romantically. damnit am i only good now for hugs. are we friends? what i meant is not sex but am i only good for physical stuff? i dont fucking know, the m-dude obviously just want a fwb and i was to trusting to notice. is this my gut feeling or my anxiety idk!

another side story. another guy suddenly expressed interested in me right when covid hit but it was because he couldnt get over his ex so i stopped talking to him for a while and picked it back up when i thought he was no longer idk being annoying about it. i thought he had to at least like me as a person to even express he liked me romantically. but apparently not. he looked so uniterested suddenly and denied when i asked, then stopped reading my texts.

so you see. i just cant if haiz ok do- do anybody like me? just as a person? idk.

god i knew i fucking suck for being so sensitive and anxious and im sr for wanting stuff but maybe i want you to look like you care a bit when i said you are reminding me of the m-dude, instead of saying ok we can talk less then. i already felt like you dont want to talk to me, you dont have to say that...

officially crying heyho.

just saying no you dont dont like talking to me when your actions were saying the opposite is not cutting it either... i also thought highly of the covid confession guy too but what happened now. im sorry for comparing you to others! but i learn from experiences... and this was sus... (yah its a joke i cant help it.)

and if i just agreed and stopped talking to him right it just, felt like a confirmation that yeah its true hes just letting me hug him not because im his friend and he knows i like hugs so he lets me. but its more like its convenient that a girl is hugging him so he wont say no. something like that. that sucks. thats all im good for. if i were his friend, it would include the talking too.

ah!! i know we are not close, we are both casual friend. he is definitely not on my top list to tell stuff to but damn i still like him enough to hurt. and to not asking for too much.

so anw i kept talking with the anxiety that never got solved and that made me frustrated and i picked at his insecurity to made him hate me enough to stop talking to me cause i couldnt bring myself to stop, id feel so bad. this is really toxic and i admit this is not the first time ive done it, to a different person but its the same thing.

hahaha act like i hate him while just want him to see how i feel so bad. yeah im a tsundere.

it worked so i stopped talking to him for a week and focused on talking to my other friends. friends i know without a doubt love me and want me because i really didnt feel that with him at all. sorry i know you were tired with covid.

that made me felt better and i was not in panic mode anymore, i can calmly assess things now. and before, i felt bad because i truly believed i was just seeing things, i couldnt see pass my anxiety and was blaming him for what, nothing. he did want to talk to me. but my mind was clearer after that one week and yeah i cant really make more excuses? yes i was sensitive and made things worse, but there must be something for me to pick up first. it didnt just come out of thin air.

so i sent him some texts saying that, because just leaving without a word is bad communication. i have to tell him and at least give him a chance to change i guess? did he need change? im doubting myself.

i- hm he just said yeah his look and way of talking really make him look like hes tired and uninterested, and laughed at my marie kondo joke. you know the one. idk! all i saw in that was yeah thats how it is, accept it. and i-- i, cant? i dont want to... i dont want to :(

but my mindset for just about anything is value the process, not the result, like as long as you put work in! thats great! and he- he was, talking... he put work in..... i would feel so bad to deny it. but at the same time, it was not enough... i hate! to say you need to do at least this and that! but it didnt feel like enough..... im sorry :(((( i am.

ive talked about my tendency to lash out. last time i didnt want it but i had to get away quick so i didnt mean it but i still did it. but this time i was truly angry. because i just wished there was more care for me but i know that was all there was, and i couldnt do anything about it. couldnt even ignore him. he was even drier then, and i got it, i lashed out at him, ofc he wasnt going to be friendly. but just why were you trying so hard... no, no it was not trying hard, you were answering texts at the speed of once every 2 days. why were you answering at all? you clearly didnt want to. but again so was i. did i really have a say.

so i sent angry texts at him. about how fake his friendliness was, did he really consider me friend, why did he keep saying no it was not that he was uninterested while it was obvious that he was. also that i want to fight him. i really do want to. hopefully he will beat me up hard enough that i can be in a coma and die in 9 months idk. (listen 9 months is enough time to make a new human, if im not awake by then, you need to let me go, thats my wish.)

he said that no he doesnt like to fight and thats the last text i got from him.

because ofc i dont hate him him, the whole him idk what im saying. just angry and hate that hes not matching me on how we value this relationship i guess. not besties like how he likes to joke, but eh, was hoping more than what i was sensing. i still sent a text being like ok fine do you still want to talk and if so how do you want me to do. but he didnt answer it in time so i decided for him that nah we wont talk anymore.

heyho i was sad, i am sad. and ok hear me out, HEAR ME, i dont use tarot for future but just for my feelings and how to deal with them, and my deck said ok babe this is the end, you will have to move on now. so i will.

tbh lmao for every relationships that i emotionally invested in. i always make an essay on my feelings because thats how i conclude things, and so i wont forget that my feelings are legit. so the moment i started this post, hes dead to me i guess.

wow this post is long. but i did really like him so.

im moving to uni city next month but i know he will leave in the summer so i wont have to worry about seeing him then. and probably not further in the future either, we go to different uni and are quite far away and our common are not gonna question things i dont think. dont think they would even notice, we are not in a group or anything. and even if i do end up meeting him. my feelings while was anger, but it stemmed from sadness and disappointment so it wouldnt be too bad. on the other hand... m-dude..... i am afraid of meeting you, lets please please please not meet damnit.

#xxxpauline