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#you guys KNOW I love a big man with a thin waist
angel-bitch-boy · 5 months
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I didn't want to be the one to say it but I need Cole Cassidy horrendously. His southern charm and thighs that could crush me would just fix me I know it
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agirlsguidetolove · 8 months
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I NEED MATHEO OR THEODORE X FEM READER AND SHE JUST LOVES HIS HANDS AND ARM VIENS AND SHE WALKS INTO HIS DORM AND IS GOBSMAKED TO SEE HIS ABS
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pairings: theodore nott x reader
word count: 0.9k
summary: ^^
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You feel safe. Your head rests in Theo’s lap, staring up at his handsome face as he reads, a hand massaging your scalp unconsciously.
Your gaze wanders down his arms, pursing your lips when you notice the veins that flow down his arms into his hands, watching as his huge hands delicately flip a page.
It’s hard to suppress a giggle, and you don’t, thinking about your man, mister mean Theodore Nott being gentle with a book, but nearly as gentle as he is with you.
It’s seductive, his loveliness, his kindness, his softness, but so is the way he looks down at you, eyes curious as he silently asks what your giggling about. You shrug up at him, but his hand leaves your hair and you from, sitting up from your spot on his bed, and turning to look at him over your shoulder.
“What’s up, babe?” you ask, watching as he crinkles the corner of his book page to mark where he left off. You cringe. Maybe he’s not the gentlest.
“Sorry, sweetheart,” he starts, leaning over to press a kiss to your lips, you pull away, he chases after your lips, muttering, “Quidditch.”
You roll your eyes, pulling away from his second kiss. You had already forgotten about his quidditch practice even though he was already in his practice jersey.
You groan, throwing yourself into his pillows. “Why, Lord, why must you do this to me?” you yell into his pillow. You can hear him chuckle.
“I’ll be back soon, hun,” he assures, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Two hours at most.”
“Two hours,” you groan again, letting your head fall into his chest. You can feel his abs underneath his thin shirt. Your mouth waters.
He pats your hair, smoothing it down before slowly backing away, off his bed. “I know,” he groans. He stands up, eyes never leaving you as he backs to his door. “I’ll be as fast as I can. Okay, sweetheart?”
“You better be.” You hum, watching him slip out the door.
The next hour is the most boring hour of your life. You mindlessly looked through Theo’s book that he left on his bed, reading his beautiful annotation, but he’s a quiet guy, his annotation are drawn down to simple cursive words with vocab you can hardly understand.
Boredom brings you back to your dorm, lying in bed, listening to Pansy draw onto her hopeless crush on Luna Lovegood. It’s entertaining, much more entertaining then sitting around and doing nothing. It’s when she leaves it get boring again, and you find your way back to Theo’s dorm.
Without a second though, you shove the door open, welcoming yourself inside.
You flush when your eyes land on Theo, his back to you, bent slightly as he stared down at his bed, completely bare from the waist up.
“Shit,” you say under your breath, hopelessly staring at your boyfriends back, unable to move.
He’s toned, the muscles in his back stare at you and you can see triceps flex at you as he holds his jersey. His veins are more prominent in his arms as he runs a hand through his sweaty hair. He’s glistening like a greek god.
“You’re shirtless,” you breathe, still standing in the doorway of his dorm. The words come out as an exclaim, and you’re embarrassed and incredibly flustered.
He turns around and your greeted with Theodore’s abs. Your mouth gapes, and you can feel your own drool forming in your mouth. You feel hot all over.
Theo smiles at the sight of you, his green quidditch jersey still in his hand, the silky material practically melts in his big hands and all of a sudden it’s hard to look away, but you manage, meeting his eyes.
“Hey, honey,” he smiles, walking up to you and grabbing you by your forearms to pull you inside his dorm and close the door. He stays close, his body heat radiating off him as you try to look him in the eyes and settle your uneven breaths.
“I didn’t know where you went,” he chuckles, looking down at you with a loving expression in his eyes. “I was beginning to get worried.”
“Worried?” you choke out, still frazzled. “Why would you be worried?”
Theo hums, pulling you as he walks backwards to his bed. He sits, pulling you between his legs so he can look up at you, his hands resting on you hips. He leans forward and kisses your belly. You can see the muscles of his back. Fuck, he was hot.
“Didn’t know where my girl was,” he shrugged, resting his chin on your belly and gazing up at you. He smiles, leaning back to fully look at you.
“I’m here,” you mutter, anxiously nibbling on your lip.
It’s so, so hard to breath. Your hands drift to his abs, feeling them tense beneath your touch. They drift downwards, until you can see the label of his boxers where they peak out under his pants. You take your hands away, Theo groans.
“And I’m so glad,” he pants. “But why don’t you come a little close?”
You yelp when he pulls you onto the bed, pushing you underneath him so he was towering over you. Under him, you can see the sharp curve of his jawline and his sweaty muscles just before he plops down on you, bearing his head in your chest and leaving little kisses. He sighs into your skin. “That’s better.”
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again, not proofread i’m lazy and imperfect but here you go! hope you like it @annaisabookworm! 🧸🫶🫀
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s1m0nth3swag · 28 days
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Hmmm I’m kinda curious on how Francis would be like as a dom in bed!
Ohhhh definitely!
I feel like Francis def is too tired to dom most times, but omg, when he isn't tired for once....
This was uhm
Harder to write than I thought! It probably really isn't good so I slapped some headcanons at the end to make up for it a little
Tysm for the ask though, Anon!
WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO; Porn with minimal plot, established relationship, GN!Reader, Dom Francis, Francis has vacation and uses it properly
NSFW UNDER THE CUT!!
If you were serious, you barely know how you ended up in this situation. You started today thinking it'd be just like any other day, your boyfriend coming home really late from work, so you'd have the apartment to yourself until he returned. Contrary to that belief, Francis had instead taken a day of vacation. He had grumbled something about it being long overdue.
From then, you had thought he'd lounge around all day. He'd probably just sleep a bit more, lay on the couch, maybe help out a little with chores - that's where you were wrong again.
Once the two of you had finished the chores around the small apartment, he grabbed you by the hips harshly. "Francis -" you yelped out, but he already pressed his lips against yours in a hungry kiss. If it was up to him, he'd have you right here, in the middle of the hallway. That's just the way Francis was, when he did have the drive to fuck you, he'd barely even think about where.
In the end, you were the one to drag him to the bedroom after he had already pulled off your top and discarded it somewhere. He trailed kisses down your neck and over your collarbone, nipping at the skin softly. "Want you s'bad..." He groaned, grinding his growing erection against your crotch. "Bet you want me too, hm? Can feel how needy you are." He adds, chuckling as he rubs small circles on your waist. You huff and pull him down towards you, kissing him feverishly.
The rest of your clothes are soon discarded - Francis rarely took his time with you. He watched the way you squirmed and whined as he slowly pushed inside you, though. He knew you just wanted to feel him. When it came to teasing, Francis had probably won a gold metal in it at some point. "So good for me, hm? It's always so tight..." he sighs lazily. His hands rest at your hips, pushing you down so you can't grind against him. You whine in protest. "Francis, please.. don't be mean.." You mumble, and he just chuckles as he presses a kiss against your cheek. "Just taking my time, love.. weren't you just complaining about me being too fast?" You scowl at him, but Francis just grins as he keeps pushing into you ever so slowly. Surely, this had to be torture for him as well? If it was, he didn't let it show one bit.
After taking his sweet time, Francis made it up to you by being way too goddamn rough. He practically abused your hole while muttering and groaning praises into your ear. You desperately held onto him, nails scratching his back. "So good, hm..? God, swear you feel heavenly..." Francis groaned into your ear, trailing kisses over your jaw. He placed hickeys and bite marks all over your neck, and you were sure with how he was treating you right now that a few on your thighs would follow soon.
As always, Francis couldn't help but finish inside you after you had reached your climax as well. He watched your slightly fucked out expression and the way his cum slowly flowed out of you, leaving kisses on your thighs, marking you up just like you thought he would. "Always so good for me, baby." He then hummed, placing a soft kiss against your lips while you snuggled against him.
I just really think Francis is a tired man and therefore rarely doms. Just takes too much of his energy.
However, I think he really really loves marking his partner. Like full-on hickeys all over your body, especially your thighs, though (he definitely is a thigh guy). Also very big on praising, though he would degrade you if you asked him to. I just think that in his mind, it's like "in love with my partner, have to tell them how much I appreciate them, especially when I'm literally taking their ability to walk!" Because I just KNOW he likes being rough. He just can't help but love the way your face contorts in pleasure at every thrust.
Francis would also 100% hold you down so he could have his way with you. He'd also slightly choke you because he holds you down by your neck when he wants to watch your reactions (this is totally not because I think that'd be hot. Nah uh.)
Also, I don't really think he is actually that kinky (or he just doesn't know that what he likes is considered a kink because that man has never spoken to anyone about it). I think he always makes sure you cum first, either makes you cum all over again before properly fucking you or denying you an orgasm as he tests how long he can hold one back himself.
Also, with a fem partner, he is so into eating them out. Genuinely obsessed with it.
With a masc partner, I think he'd be the type to touch them while just watching their expressions
he is so big on watching his partner. He just wants to make sure he's making you feel good still, even though he definitely has your favourite spots memorised by heart.
Anyway! Really short omg I'm sorry. I'm currently obsessing over School Bus Graveyard, so uhm! Not many Francis thoughts in my brain. I hope this isn't as bad as it looks to me (it's definitely worse, but I will not be bothered (I will panic about it))
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kausstar · 5 months
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ᯓ ✶ IT FEELS GOOD TO KNOW YOU’RE MINE ◞ rodrick heffley.
headcanon/drabble tags female reader. black reader in mind. sfw + nsfw content. swearing. different rodrick’s like perv! rodrick, virgin! rodrick, boyfriend! rodrick… all that. kissing. ꒰ was gonna write a drabble but i just kept coming up with only small drabbles sooo here they are ꒱
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boyfriend! rodrick who leaves things at your house just to have an excuse to see you. will leave things that don’t have a purpose in his day to day like a shirt or some bracelets and still come back for them.
best friend! rodrick who likes you, glares at every guy that tries to flirt with you. watches from afar as the two of you talk and will be jealous. will ask you what it was about after or not speak to you all that much (only giving you short sentences and groans until you ask what’s wrong).
pantie-stealer! perv! rodrick who’s definitely slipped a pair of your panties into his pocket when leaving your house. fully planning on fisting them onto his cock later.
boyfriend! rodrick who thinks about fucking you in the back of his van . . . a lot.
boyfriend! rodrick who’s dazed by you in every single way. your smile, your eyes, your ass, your hair— he’s completely whipped.
perv! boyfriend! rodrick who loves when you wear short shorts. watching your ass move in them makes his eyes fall out of his head. 
rodrick heffley who’s definitely an ass man but will favorite your tits sometimes.
boyfriend! rodrick who does his own eyeliner but loves when you compliment him.
boyfriend! rodrick’s mom who literally adores you. enjoys seeing her son so happy.
boyfriend! rodrick who loves to make out with you while you sit on his lap. will rest his hands at your waist and not move them or will wrap his arms around your waist to pull you closer.
boyfriend! rodrick who will say yes to anything you ask if you give him that pretty smile and doe eyes.
boyfriend! rodrick’s mom who takes pictures of the two of you in the embarrassing mom way and will keep them.
“aww, you two look so cute. come here, come here. let me take a picture.”
boyfriend! rodrick who acts so big and bad but will lay on your chest and let you play in his hair, going as far as going to sleep on you.
crush! rodrick who makes plans to hang out with you most of the summer.
boyfriend! rodrick who likes when you wear his shirts. especially his bands shirts. won’t get you one of your own though because he wants you to wear his.
perv! boyfriend! rodrick who watches you change when you’re in his room sometimes. says he won’t look but he always end up taking a peak. can’t help it.
rodrick heffley with a sweet girlfriend who loves how friendly and supportive you are, but absolutely hates how so many guys are pulled in by your personality. you’re intentions being so much different than theirs.
boyfriend! rodrick who does stupid things to impress you.
boyfriend! rodrick who looks at you with doe eyes every time you speak. listens to you even when you’re talking about complete nonsense.
virgin! boyfriend! rodrick who supposedly knows all about what girls like but has absolutely no experience with kissing and will stutter up a storm when you first ask for one.
boyfriend! rodrick who will buy things that he doesn’t need but you do. for example, him getting a mirror in his room just for you to look at yourself in so you don’t have to go to the bathroom.
boyfriend! rodrick who will listen to your music, and will secretly listen to it over and over even if it’s not his normal taste.
virgin! perv! boyfriend! rodrick who likes when you roll your hips onto him when you’re on his lap. the thin fabric of your panties and his boxers the only thing stopping the two of you from being skin to skin.
boyfriend! rodrick who rubs your relationship in greg’s face. always grinning from ear to ear when you do something sweet for him in front of him.
boyfriend! rodrick who doesn’t really do too much PDA. only wrapping his arm around your waist and maybe some forehead kisses.
boyfriend! rodrick who likes when you kiss him on the cheek when you’re leaving but adores when you give him a kiss and you’re lipgloss/chapstick lingers on his lips.
boyfriend! rodrick biggest excuse nowadays being “can’t. girlfriend’s coming over” with the biggest grin.
crush! rodrick who doesn’t know how to flirt at all. always awkwardly smiling, making stupid jokes and saying the “wrong” things.
boyfriend! rodrick band mates who call him whipped all the time.
crush! rodrick who’s so positive he will get your number he brags about having you wrapped around his finger already, but will get your number and get excited about every interacting with you. small and big.
boyfriend! rodrick who holds the door for you then will let it shut completely on greg’s face.
boyfriend! rodrick who gets caught up with the band and has to be pulled away from them so you can spend time together.
virgin! boyfriend! rodrick who doesn’t know how big he is until you’re whining at him that he’s really deep.
boyfriend! rodrick gets rid of his dirty magazines from up under his bed to fill a shoe box with pictures of you. the pictures being of what you expect and he has to hide them the best he can because of greg’s snooping.
boyfriend! rodrick who likes surprises and gifts. especially if you made them yourself and he can wear it for everyone to see.
boyfriend! rodrick who tries to be as close as possible to you during the summer. with you short shorts, small shirts and bathing suits guys are bound to be howling at your feet.
crush! rodrick who enjoys halloween and seeing you at parties. eyes glued on you the entire night.
boyfriend! rodrick who’s gotten in trouble more than three times for how loud the two of you are.
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 2023 kausstar.
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luvfy0dor · 29 days
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“You Know That I'm Obsessed With Your Body ♡⁠˖” BSD Men x GN!Reader ੈ✩‧₊˚
╰┈➤ Chuuya Nakahara, Osamu Dazai, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Nikolai Gogol, Sigma, H.P. Lovecraft
Warnings; Suggestive, kisses, hickeys, bite marks, allusions to self harm (Dazai), sh scars (Dazai), prolly a little ooc
Description; BSD men and their physical attributes
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A/n; CAS lyric title!!! But I cannot bring myself to write reqs RN so............but guys i actually talked to a guy OMG never thought I'd have big enough balls but I got his ig ^w^
⑅Chuuya Nakahara⑅
Chuuyas arms are beautiful to you, they're not insanely buff and they're not thin, but at a perfect equilibrium. They're decorated with intricate tattoos and beautiful colors, and sometimes small dotted lines left by your teeth or maroon spots formed by your love and passion for each other. You loved feeling them wrap around your torso or waist with him leaning his head against your back, letting all the thoughts in his mind flow from his mouth like a waterfall. Other times, he'd hang his arms over your shoulders, letting you feel his biceps against the nape of your neck, ghosting over the baby hairs on your skin. His arms can carry you too, no matter your weight. If it'd make you feel better, he'd use his ability to help and reassure you that he won't drop you or let you get hurt.
“There we go, darlin', see, I told you I wouldn't let you get hurt. Literally not even the strongest gust of wind could knock me over with you right now, so quit worrying.”
⑅Osamu Dazai⑅
Dazai has such a gorgeous torso, bandaged or not. His skin is soft on contrast to the rough and volatile life he's always lead. The only patches of skin that aren't smooth are the ones that are littered with past scars, whether self inflicted or from other people. When Dazai trusts you enough, he'll ask you to help him take off his bandages before bed, letting your fingers brush over the rigid bumps and sharply inhaling while adjusting to your sweet touch in a new, naked place. He lets you kiss the scars and it helps him feel a little relaxed receiving your acceptance through soft kisses and affection instead of being pitied or shamed for his past. It's not like you encourage it, but you don't waste your breath on lecturing him on why he shouldn't have. It's in the past, so instead you'll offer your support for him now rather than dwelling on what you can't change.
“Mmnn...your lips are so soft on my back, baby...keep going, sweetheart, you know how much I love feeling your kisses on my skin...”
⑅Nikolai Gogol⑅
Nikolais thighs could resurrect a dead man, and you couldn't help but feel the same way every time you had your head between or against them. Occasionally your hands would hold them apart and squeeze or grope at them, feeling the firmness beneath the palm of your hand. The pressure from your fingertips leaves temporary pale spots with every pinch and your teeth and tongue leave red ones in your wake as you kiss, suck, and bite all over his thigh, and he loves it. Nikolai loves the harsh feeling of your teeth clamping around his skin, making him gasp and giggle in excitement with a hand on your neck encouraging you to continue. He's got a higher pain tolerance, so if you like to give lovebites, especially on thighs, he's your guy.
“Ah-! Oh, don't worry dove, it doesn't hurt. You know I have a good pain tolerance! You can keep going, hehe, I don't mind it.”
⑅Fyodor Dostoevsky⑅
Fyodors hands are thin and pale aside from some select spots with higher blood concentration. His nails are bitten down to the quick almost always and his fingers are bony and thin. They rest gently on your hips when you sit on his lap while he types or just relaxes with you, his thumbs rubbing circles into the fabric of either your top or bottoms. Sometimes they'll travel upwards, resting against your midsection and making you shiver from their low temperature. He'd laugh under his breath at your reaction and slide them further up, loving the idea that he has you squirming in his grasp. Otherwise, he'd keep a hand on your thigh, rubbing it out of habit modestly. In public he keeps his hands to himself, but in private his hands have a mind of their own.
“Are they that cold, Moya Lyubov? You'll get used to it eventually, unless you'd like to find your own way to warm my hands up?”
⑅Sigma⑅
Sigmas jawline is so defined and Everytime you look at it, an overwhelming urge to kiss along it bubbles up inside of you. Sigma doesn't dislike it, but he'll act like he does, always squirming and playfully grimacing. Eventually he'll give in though, holding your hand while you pepper soft pecks along his skin. He'll return them all over your cheeks and nose, tickling your skin and making you giggle. You can't help but watch Sigmas fingers trace over his jawline while he's deep in thought about this that and the other, admiring how perfect it looks on him.
“H-hey, knock it off, I'm in the middle of fillin' out papers! I said quit it- huff...fine, just a few though! You're really distracting, you know that?”
Bonus; ⑅ H.P. Lovecraft⑅
His hair is so long and luscious- how could you not want to run your fingers through it while your sleepy boyfriend lays his head in your lap? The upper half is smooth and straight while it changes into silky curls towards the bottom, though they're not the tightest and allow for your fingers to brush through them with minimal effort. He loves the feeling of your hands against his scalp, giving soft hums and groans of a relaxed pleasure. His face has his usual neutrality regardless of how nice it feels to get his head massaged by his lover. He frequently lets you pull it into a ponytail or put it into braids or whatever style you please. He lets you brush it, too, as long as you start at the bottom instead of ripping the brush through his hair.
“Mnn...that feels nice, dear...don't mind if I fall asleep on top of you, I can't help it.”
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A/n; I feel so bad for not getting to requests, something like this was the easiest thing to do this week though because I had mock trial comp right after school so i couldn't write anything from 8am-7;30 pm some nights and it was the end of the quarter so i had to focus more on school work.
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qwimchii · 7 months
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𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭 (pt. 5) — 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘳𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘺
playlist pt. 1 pt. 2 pt. 3 pt. 4 pt. 5 pt. 6 pt. 7 pt. 8 (10/24)
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𝘨𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳!𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘹 𝘧!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺 — 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘢 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘯, 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘴𝘵'𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘭𝘢𝘸, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘭 𝘩𝘪𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘸𝘤 — 17.2𝘬 (oopsie)
𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦 — 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧, 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘴𝘵, 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵
𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴/𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 — 𝘨𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳!𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵, 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘥𝘰𝘮!𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵, 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘥𝘰𝘮!𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘵, 𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘷𝘪𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘯!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘸𝘦𝘴𝘵!𝘢𝘶, 141𝘨𝘢𝘯𝘨!𝘢𝘶, 𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 (10𝘺𝘳𝘴), 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘭𝘤𝘰𝘩𝘰𝘭, 𝘴𝘮𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 & 𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘳𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘤𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘴, 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘬, 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘱 𝘪𝘯 𝘷, 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩(ish), 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘷𝘪𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺
note: casually posts this 3 days later.... im so sorry you guys i didn't mean to drop off the face of the earth >< things came up all of a sudden but the next chapter is here!!
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your dreams were long and relentless. they stretched out into scenes that didn’t make sense, but there were some distinct faces. one-four-one, Kate, and strange muted flickers of Konig’s ginger head, Yue-Yi, then a warmth peeking up between the passing scenes.
Simon. his bare face with silvery scars.
you wanted to reach out and touch him but he crumbled like sand before you could, collecting in a brown particulate matter between your fingers, then blowing away into the whistling wind.
then there were darker images. Charles and his gold tooth. the red gouge in the middle of Turner’s head. his cowering wife and small daughter in her arms.
your dead daddy and mama rotting away in the sand.
you didn’t know what to make of all of it, dragging your feet through a thick sludge that you couldn’t see, traveling to a place you didn’t know as images streamed past in an endless, murky deluge.
you dreamed like that for a long time, heavy and infinite, till you laid down in the soft earth and invisible sludge, letting the sticky warmth of it suck you down into the dirt and the sand blow over your body.
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when you woke two days later, three, maybe four, you weren’t sure, you slowly blinked awake and sat up in the bed. you looked around.
the windows were drawn open in the soft light of the morning, pouring across the wooden floorboards and cast over the thick blankets of the small bed. there was a desk on the far side of the room, a compact kitchen pressed to the corner, and you jolted with a gasp.
Simon’s cabin.
drawing off the covers quickly, and shivering in dewy, cold morning, clad in a thin nightgown, you quickly walked to the mesh door of the cabin, feeling light and airy.
pushing the door open, you could smell a tinge of something rich and savory in the air, and saw a man in a white button up and jeans crouched down, stoking something in a pot strung up over a campfire.
he had a familiar, broad back, and a blonde head of hair. with a grin so big it ached, you padded with bare feet over to him, and draped yourself over the warm, strong expanse of his back, wrapping your arms around his neck with a hum.
“good morning, lovely,” he said with a low, thrumming laugh, turning his head to press his nose into your cheek. 
you closed your eyes and nuzzled against him, squealing when he reached behind to wrap his arms around your legs and draw them around his waist, hoisting you up on his back as he stood. you clutched onto him, laughing as he walked back up the path to the cabin and laid you out over the bed with a softness.
he pressed his face to your neck, stroking through your hair, mumbling against your skin, “how are you feeling, pretty girl?”
“perfect,” you sang, truthfully honest, your heart soaring at the sight of him. you lifted his face gently to look over the easy smile that adorned it.
his strong blonde brow, the curve of his nose, full lips, dark eyes, and strong jaw, and—
your eyes darted over his upper lip again. there was no silvery scar.
brows pinched together now, Simon smoothed a hand over your chest. “what is it, lovely?”
“your scar,” you said with wonder, head tilted, “it’s gone.”
he laughed softly, the sound rough and musical. “what do you mean?”
then, he leaned down to press a gentle kiss to your lips, soft, warm, wet and captivating as his lips moved against your own.
but you pushed him back by his chest, feeling a strange, murky sensation in your stomach.
“what are we doing here, Simon?” you asked, apprehensive. he drew back, sitting on the edge of the bed and taking your hand in his.
“you’re asking such strange questions, lovely,” he said with a furrowed brow, though there was a still wry smile on his lips.
you rolled your eyes with your own smirk. “then, answer them.”
he grinned, kissing your hand softly.
“what’s going through my pretty wife’s mind?”
a dread accumulated in your throat, and your tongue grew heavy. “wife?”
his grip faltered at the flat tone of your voice, and you looked down to your joined hands, startling at the sight of a sparkling ring on your hand that was enveloped between his fingers.
“what do you want?”
your eyes snapped to his. “what?”
his face was eerily empty and void and totally unlike his own now. he cocked his head. “what do you want?”
you sat up, inching away from him. he was stock still, eyes following your movements with a predatory precision. there was a new, burning sensation building in your arm and you hissed, gripping at the tightly, but looking down to find nothing different about your skin.
Simon’s voice dropped an octave, harsh and cold now. “what do you want from me?”
you stood from the bed, and he followed you, edging you out of the cabin, looming over you with a menacing height you had never seen before. his face was twisted with anger.
“what do you want from me?”
you clasped your hands over your ears, turning on your heel and running out the cabin and away from its idyllic warmth, bare feet thudding over the earth. you didn’t turn to look if Simon was still following you, but you could hear his distant shouts through your hands. 
“what do you want from me?”
the forest stretched into the desert and you wandered through its uncanny, thick and sandy sludge with bare feet, the thin cotton of your nightgown grating against your skin. you dragged your feet, a new exhaustion overcoming you with an insurmountable wave. the skin of your arm still burned with a ferocity.
to quell it, you laid down in the sand and thick sludge, letting the sticky warmth of it suck you down into the earth and the sand blow over your body.
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when you awoke, you really, really knew it was real this time because there was a sore dryness in your mouth, a pulsing ache in your head, and a searing, thorough burn enveloping your arm and reaching down to your fingertips.
your eyes fluttered open. there wasn’t an idyllic cabin awaiting you, no rays of warm sunlight through the windows, nor a husband making breakfast for his wife before she woke. just a cramped room and small windows that were a pitched black dark. the soft light of the oil lamp beside you, carefully balanced on a thin, precarious nightstand, poured over the quilt blankets weighing you down.
you could barely do more than roll your head to the side, and you were endlessly grateful to see the back of Kate’s blonde head bobbing lightly as she clicked away on a typewriter at a small desk framed with stacked books on the opposite side of the narrow room, a cigarette between her lips, smoke trailing up above her head in a hazy cloud.
you tried to use your voice, to call out, but all that came out was a breathy, grating warble that had Kate whirling around in her chair with alarm.
when she saw you had awoken, she struggled to her feet, putting out the cigarette against the fine woodstain of the desk, and reached for your good hand.
“hey, hey,” she soothed, snatching a cup of water from the nightstand and bringing it to your lips, helping you take down the cool liquid over the scalding heat in your throat.
you gulped it down gratefully.
she patted your cheek with a tenderness that had your eyes closing at the lightest touch. “glad to see you awake. you scared us, missy. you slept for three days.”
you almost choked on the water at that and she drew back the cup with a haste and a noise of alarm, pulling you forward slightly to slap at your back.
emerging from your coughing fit, you jolted when you met a pair of dark brown eyes by the edge of the room. within the corner of the room, it seemed Maria had just emerged from a slumber in an armchair, rubbing at her face before stretching back into it.
Kate’s line of sight followed your eyes, face impossibly mellow when she and Maria shared a smile. you noted the interaction with a creeping curiosity.
attempting your voice, and sounding entirely unlike yourself, you croaked, “what happened?”
Kate took your hand again, tighter this time as Maria came closer. she sat at the foot of the bed with a tired smile, your feet pressed into her side.
“there’s more good than bad,” Kate said, looking so tired you didn’t think she could muster anything but the truth. you were betting on it.
“tell me the truth Kate,” you said, voice stronger now, “i want all of it. the bad.”
she shared another look with Maria, sighing out after a long moment. “alright.”
you straightened, inching further up the pillows, much to your body’s resistance, and curled an arm around your chest, trying not to fidget against the itching, creeping thrum of pain in your other arm. your eyes darted down to it—wrapped up tight in bandages from mid-bicep to your fingertips. where the pain had been in your endless dreams.
Kate followed your line of sight. “first off,” she started, tapping a finger lightly to your bandaged wrist, “bad burn. there was a surgery. will probably leave scars.”
you grimaced at the thought, but you could handle a few scars after barely scraping away with your own life. your painfully empty stomach broiled at the thought.
“how did i survive?” you asked, almost in wonder. you were so sure your last moments would’ve been beside Simon—the thick smog clouding your senses and tipping everything in a smoky, confusing daze that kept you tethered to the floor, and his soft lips against your own. 
even if you crawled, you don’t think you could’ve escaped that burning mansion.
“that austrian hitman,” she sighed out, rubbing a hand over her forehead with frustration. “took you and ran. left Ghost behind to die.”
you stiffened at the thought, not sure if you would thank Konig or slap him by the end of this. if you even would see him by the end of this. did you even want to see him by the end of this?
with a sour feeling, your voice dropped, solemn and throaty. “and Simon?”
she grimaced. “he’s… alive.”
you released a shaky breath. alive was enough. more than enough.
“and the rest of you? one-four-one? how did you escape the mansion?”
she looked away from you, staring at an untrained point in the room. “we turned tail as soon as the mansion was up in flames. so did Turner’s men. Ghost was an idiot and went runnin’ in to finish off Turner and got trapped in by fallen debris. we couldn’t reach him and he got burnt. bad. i’m assumin’ he found you in the process.”
you nodded slowly, biting back a bitter swirl of anger. Simon, always so careless with his own life, and overprotective of your own. you wanted to hate him for it.
like always, you couldn’t.
“i killed Turner,” you said, voice an eerie emptiness you didn’t know you could manage.
Maria roused at the end of the bed, slouched body growing straighter, sharing a wide-eyed glance with Kate before their attention was trained on you again.
“that’s…” Kate searched for words. “news.”
you continued on. “i killed him. i wanted to leave him and let him burn to death but…”
you remembered the curling, blooming delight you felt in the moment of putting a bullet right through his forehead.
now, you just felt an overwhelming numbness.
with your prolonged silence, Kate released your hand to stroke your good arm in comfort. “you did us and yourself a service, honey.”
you just gave her a sheepish look and she returned it with a wry smile. “who knew you had it in you, angel?”
Yue-Yi did, you thought weakly, though the nauseating roil in your stomach decided that you never wanted to kill again. you never wanted to take revenge on another person again.
a panic rose thinking of the possibility of it. one-four-one would undoubtedly fill the power vacuum left behind by Turner’s death, but who would rise to challenge that?
the inevitable, never-ending prospect of violence that followed the gang like a bad omen left you clutching at your stomach with dread.
Maria leaned forward onto her palm, and she asked, “what is wrong, carino?”
her brown eyes darted over your stiff body.
“i think i’m gonna be sick,” you admitted with a sour feeling in your mouth, the room a dizzy swirl now.
Kate let out a gruff sound, leaning you back into the pillows again. “not possible. you haven’t eaten for days.”
“m’not hungry,” you lied, feeling the every acute shooting pain through your stomach. you don’t think you could keep anything down even if you tried.
that didn’t seem to convince Kate.
she left you and Maria in a drifting silence, the vaquero curling back up in the armchair and lounging in it, looking sleepy and content at your presence.
Kate came back with a plate of plain bread and greasy green beans with bacon bits.
“sorry,” she said, handing you the food with a somber look, “s’all we have. haven’t been cookin’ much.”
at that, Maria slunk from the room with tired promises to go whip something up in the kitchen, wholly ignoring your protests as you sopped up the bread in the savoryness of the green beans and chewed mechanically, forcing yourself to swallow and ignore the nauseating waves that followed.
in the meantime, Kate described the night of the party—how one-four-one had released the chandelier onto the gathered crowd of partygoers to clear out the place before any further bloodshed. when you told her how you had met Konig, and your own plans to kill Turner for yourself, running from the chandelier that came crashing down over your head, she was only mournful, taking up your hand with a softness. then, you described how Yue-Yi had been instrumental in your plans that day.
you carefully avoided sensitive discussion of Yue-Yi, only revealing that there was a sympathetic girl from the brothel who was kind enough to help you. you could only hope that Simon wouldn’t speak of her betrayal to the rest of one-four-one and los vaqueros. you knew he wasn’t stupid enough to think that you ran from the brothel and arrived at Turner’s mansion without help.
you wondered if he was thinking about you at all.
instead of thinking about that, you mourned Yue-Yi’s absence, deliberating when you could next slip away and see her after your condition improved. shifting around in the bed, you realized it might be a much longer wait than you wanted.
“where am i?” you asked, hands twitching, feeling restless. you wanted to leave.
Kate gave you a weak smile. “a farm.”
your brows raised. “a farm?”
“we’re still in california—a bit from san francisco. there’s still fighting in the city. law’s tryin’ to suppress it but it won’t die down for another coupla’ weeks.”
you felt like your eyes almost bulged from your head. “but Turner…?” 
is dead. you couldn’t say it, throat closing up around the words knowing that you were the reason he was gone.
she shook her head slowly. “he’s got plenty of loyal minions. we’re chopping off heads for now. won’t last much longer. at least, that’s what John wrote.”
your mind reeled at the thought of the soft-smiled bearded and bear-like man. “and they’re okay?”
she gave you a wicked look. “‘course. we’re one-four-one.”
at that, you couldn’t help but smile and lax back into the pillows. your tongue felt heavy. “where’s Simon?”
the smile drifted from her face. “fighting.”
you screwed your eyes shut. of course he was. “i thought he was burned bad?”
you felt the bed dip as Kate shimmied onto the edge of it, her hand on your knee beneath the quilt.
“he was, but not burnt as deep as you. besides, i couldn’t keep that brute in bed even if i tried.”
of course. you felt your eyes almost brim with hot, angry tears, but you bit them back with a ferocity.
instead you opened your eyes, looking over the age and fatigue of Kate’s face, and said, “you should go. i know you want to be fighting with them.”
her eyes flashed and she shifted on the bed, telling you all that you needed to know. she wanted to go.
“i’ll be fine,” you said, “just give me that paperwork to do.”
you nodded your head towards the paper strewn across her desk.
“it’ll keep me busy.”
her brows raised slightly. “you know i can’t do that.”
your jaw clenched with a hot, sparking tightness in your chest. “am i still your prisoner?”
she stared at you for a long moment. “no. you can leave whenever you like.”
“will you let me stay?”
for a sickening heart beat, she was silent once more, eyes betraying nothing but a pale blue, before she said, “yes. you’re one of us now.”
you nodded, pulse still thudding with a nauseating speed in your temple. “good. give me those papers. i want to help.”
you couldn’t imagine the stretch of the next couple of days, possibly even weeks, doing nothing but waiting and worrying and healing while one-four-one was finishing the fight against Turner’s lackeys. you wanted to leave. was there a possibility you could slip away? and how would you?
you spoke nothing of it when Kate showed you some of the papers—financial, with lots of math, money, and reading involved. you had helped your mama with the fiances of your daddy’s saloon. nothing you couldn’t handle with a bit of practice.
you bit down any murky feelings at the thought of your daddy and mama, letting Kate help you swing your legs over the edge of the bed, putting half your weight onto the floor. your legs shook—feeling leaden and dead with a lack of circulation through the limbs that Kate rubbed to life before she hoisted you to the cramped desk.
settled in the chair, you spread the papers out over the desk, pulling the abacus closer to you and ran through the items on the page. Kate swept your hair over your shoulder.
“you don’t need to do this now. you should wash up and eat more.”
you only shook your head. “i want to help.”
she sighed out, massaging at your shoulders with a tenderness. “you don’t owe us anything, honey. you only just woke up.”
you made a disgruntled noise, ignoring her, but remembered Yue-Yi’s words with a keenness. 
i know what it is like to want to be useful… now, i am not useful to anybody but myself.
her voice was defiant and strong. you only found yourself missing her more as you slowly put down the papers, ruminating with a tight feeling in your throat.
“i’m doing this for myself,” you rephrased, taking up the documents again and fishing out a pen underneath the strewn mess of paperwork.
Kate’s hands fell from your shoulders, mumbling something about helping Maria with a strained frustration in her voice, and you scribbled down some notes into the margins of the texts, breaking into the first series of equations.
you stayed there almost the entire night before Kate forced you to slurp down a steaming bowl of caldo de pollo full of hearty vegetables thick with ginger, drink more water, and sink into a cool bath that felt pleasant against the sore ache of your burnt skin. lifting your arm to your face, you observed it carefully.
a thin layer of skin stretched over the deep, red wounds. you shivered at the thought of the same thing stretched over the expanse of Simon’s chest, shoulder, maybe even traveling to his back…
all while he was in san francisco fighting.
shivering, you slipped out of the bath, bracing yourself against the counter to resist the wobble of your weak legs, a deep, rolling cold consuming you.
dread. you couldn’t shake it as you dressed in an airy nightgown, ditching a corset, which was very unlike you, and redressed your arm.
clutching at the walls, you made your way back down the set of rickety stairs into the living room. Maria was thumbing through a book near a small, lopsided bookcase, placing it quickly back on the shelf when she noticed your presence.
she gave you an awkward smile, clasping her hands behind her back, as you moved into the space. from the interior, you determined it was a small, wooden farmhouse with a brick red fireplace and big windows that overlooked the unkempt bushes in the garden and a flat, grainy plain where a barn sat in the distance, clouds thick in the night sky. a german shepherd, who you had not seen before, laid curled up on the carpet by the foot of the upright piano, his nose tucked into his tail with slow, sleepy breaths.
Maria cleared her throat beside you, and you could hear her begin to slink away before you turned to her.
“how did you and Kate meet?”
her whole body snapped to you, and you sat at the plush, gingham couch across from the fireplace, legs aching with effort. she sunk into the ottoman by the edge of the fireplace.
“spanish-american war,” she said slowly, thoughtfully, and with a strange stiffness. then, she smiled, and you were struck by the soft beauty of it. “i was younger than her. i couldn’t speak any english, but Kate tried to talk to me anyway. she started learning spanish for me, but ay dios mio, she was so bad.”
you cracked a smile at that, leaning back into the cushions. “please. tell me more.”
she hummed, hesitant, playing with the ends of her braids. “i wasn’t always a vaquero. i was a barmaid in a small town in southern texas that only spoke spanish and raised cattle. most of the town boys grew up to be ranch hands. i wanted to, too, but i wasn’t allowed. that’s what i thought until i met Kate during the war.”
you watched with a wonder at the mellowness of her—voice warm, body lax as she talked about the blonde woman.
“do you live here?” you asked instead, and she avoided your eyes, playing with the collar of her button up. 
“yes.”
you cocked your head. “alone?”
she shook her head with a flush. “with Kate.”
your brows rose slightly. your mama had told you it was uncommon for women to live with each other without a husband, but you assumed, with the absence of a surrounding neighbors, Kate and Maria didn’t worry about the social stigmas that your mama had.
there was nothing explicitly wrong for a woman to not get married and maintain their own profession, you thought distantly, not sure if you believed the idea yourself.
“you must be good friends,” you said with a firm nod and Maria stiffened.
“we are.”
you almost worried you had said something wrong with the tightness in her face, but Kate reappeared from the hallway of the stairs, padding over to stand by Maria’s shoulder. 
she commanded that you go back to sleep and you obeyed, half desperate to just escape the growing divide between yourself and Maria, much to your confusion and guilt, climbing back into the small bed that Kate had lent you.
the cool cast of the night sky flooded into your room. you watched the way it splashed across the door of the opposite side of the room, a part of you hoping with desperation that the door would slowly twist open, and a familiar person would step inside, flush by your side for the night. that same fat, ugly mass of dread sat heavy on your chest.
a part of you hoped it would be Simon who climbed into your bed as your eyelids fluttered shut. behind them, a slew of nightmares crept towards you, its tendrils squeezing you tight the whole night until you woke the next morning.
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you spent the day between Kate’s paperwork and wandering across the farmland. you watched Maria and Kate ranch their throng of cattle with a couple of ranch hands from the nearby town, the livestock huffing and mooing as they lazily meandered across the grassy pasture.
the german shepherd snapped his jaws at their heels, tail wagging and tongue lolling out as he pranced around for a good chase that the cows ignored with heavy snorts.
you shielded the sun from your face with your good arm, tightening the shawl around your shoulders, crossing your boots as you leaned against the fence. the loose dress you wore fettered around you with a foreign slack, fluttering in the whipping wind. whether Kate and Maria noticed you had left your corset discarded in the pile of clothes on the floor of your temporary room, they did not question it.
by noon, you had picked the grassy terrain clean of its wildflowers, bunching them into your hand, the green sap of their stems staining your hands, as you bent them into flower wreaths like you had done with the girls from church after sunday service.
when was the last time you had gone to church?
setting down the floral crowns into your lap with a sigh, you looked up to gaze over the distant, stretching plains, only finding an impossible abundance of more wildflowers just out of reach from the space you had cleared.
stacking two crowns on your head, you held a third as you trekked back towards the wood farmhouse where Kate’s distant form waved you over for lunch.
you didn’t speak much over the meal—sandwiches stuffed with tomatoes, greens, and thin slices of leftover pork chop that the three of you were eating slowly away every day. you listened to the two women in a haze, mind far off and distant.
when Kate stood to clean the dishes, Maria hot on her heels, you stood abruptly, the chair scraping against the floorboards with a screech.
“has John written?” you asked, then added quickly, fighting to keep your voice even, “or Simon?”
Maria continued to the kitchen, her back to you as she scrubbed at the dishes in the sink. Kate gave you a sad smile.
“i’m sorry, honey. it won’t be for a while now.”
you almost choked. you were in no condition to ride out with the fragile state of your body, as much as you had been thinking about it all day, as much as you had been trying to keep the thoughts under a tightly sealed lid. that used to work for you, but now…
it seemed everything was just pouring out.
“how long?” you pressed, and Kate gave you a confused look.
your hand clenched into the soft material of your cotton dress. “how much longer until the fighting ends?”
Kate turned to join Maria’s side in the kitchen, rolling up her dusty sleeves as she strode over.
“not sure,” she said, a murky look pinching her face. “i wish i knew darlin’.”
you did too, you mourned, that dread buzzing in between the soft inner pockets of your head. for one in maybe your entire life, no one around you expected you to stay. no one expected you to leave either. no one around you was forcing you to go one way or the next—you had the freedom to stay or leave.
and beyond the marvel of it, you still couldn’t go anywhere you wanted. you looked down to the white bandage of your arm, feeling itchy and stuffy beneath the gauze, and cursed its existence.
instead of moping, you helped them finish the dishes as best as you could with your poor arm, and returned to that small desk in your cramped room, making your way through the thick stack of papers. it kept your mind to something and kept your hands working steadily without a second thought.
there was a simple process to it—calculation, step by step, and something that, no matter the initial difficulty, had a solvable end. it soon became addictive, and before you knew it, the sun had dipped behind the horizon again and your eyes drooped, striking a match to light a nearby oil lamp. 
you continued the calculations till the fat paper stack had thinned, resisting fatigue with every ounce of fight until you slumped against the desk in defeat, falling down into a slumber where familiar nightmares clutched at you once more.
before you knew it, a whole week had passed just like that. waking to your cheek pressed to the papers on your desk, a dry trail of drool across them. you would wash up, eat, wander the plains and waiting with impatience for your hand to heal, listening in on Kate and Maria’s conversations without much to say, eat again with a bitter and stale feeling in your mouth, a lingering dread that refused to melt feeling thick in your throat, and ration the dwindling leftover of papers on one-four-one’s finances.
you dreaded falling asleep most of all. there were always grotesque images—Turner dead, your daddy and mama dead, the three of Turner’s men dead, one-four-one and los vaqueros dead, Yue-Yi’s beautiful, milky skin bloodied and mutilated, and Simon…
the conjures of a distorted Simon in your mind felt too real. terrifying and foreign and the antithesis of the warmth Simon had shown you and the Simon that you knew and yet…
you feared your dreams.
you fought sleep every night. sometimes, you got lucky and staved it off, much to Kate’s chagrin. by the end of the week, she had resorted to sitting at the edge of your bed, trapping you beneath the quilt and caging you into the mattress that felt like it was swallowing you whole. sometimes, you talked, her hand stroking against your hair to speed the process, Maria tucked in the corner, content and sleepy and curled up in the arm chair.
sometimes, you didn’t.
this night, you didn’t feel like talking, turned on your good side and facing the wall, Kate’s hand on the crown of your head. 
Kate must’ve sensed something was wrong because her hand pulled away, pulling you out of the slumber you were just on the verge of being dragged into, despite your persistent resistance.
“i’m sorry.” you stiffened.
slowly shifting onto your back, you looked over at Kate, her face lined with fatigue.
you forced your jaw to work. “why?”
she looked away, casting her gaze out the window and over the dark plains.
“you’re supposed to go wherever you like, but i can’t help but feel like we’ve trapped you all over again.”
there was a real, dripping guilt in her words that roused you from a haze. you didn’t know what to say.
instead, you forced a smile on your lips, and gripped at her arm to get her attention. her pale eyes were full and grim.
“you’re supposed to be fighting but i can’t help but feel like i’m preventing you from doing so,” you said, and she just shook her head.
“i don’t want to leave you,” she said, voice tight, and you felt a slow, wet burn in your eyes, mouth falling open, and then closing again.
“we’ve been so awful to you,” she whispered.
your mind raced. had they been?
one-four-one had kidnapped you, lied to you, deceived you and used you for a revenge ploy. could you blame them after the sorts of revenges you had taken? you knew it wasn’t personal. they would’ve done the same to any one of your daddy’s children—you just happened to be his only child.
but all the same, their plans had indirectly saved you from your daddy and your mama and Turner. they had shown you honest kindness throughout it and promised to return you to your home on that train ride, not knowing you didn’t want to go. you got to know each of them personally, whether they planned it or not, and Simon showed you a whole new realm of affection.
your throat closed up at the thought of him, heart twinging with a heavy, dark weight.
had Simon’s words been true? he wasn’t going to bed you for revenge from the beginning? much less even have personal relations with you? he promised he would never abandon you… was that still true? or heat of the moment reassurance—moments before you thought you would die together? 
no matter how much you wanted to be a part of one-four-one, as Kate confirmed, could you forgive all of them anyways?
you looked up into Kate’s face, hooded and wrung through.
“will you be honest with me now and forever from this point on?”
she didn’t hesitate when she nodded. “you’re one of us.”
“then answer my questions,” you said, voice soft. “tell me the whole truth. from the beginning.”
and she held true to her pledge—she retold their entire ploy against Turner from the very, very beginning. how it began when they created one-four-one after the war, gunslinging and gambling for money, expanding their territory and negotiating with small towns and saloon chains, then bigger corporations, till they reached Turner’s borders. soon, one-four-one’s rise to fame got them in a lot more trouble than they could chew, always on the run from the law and Turner’s men till los vaqueros stepped into the conflict as allies, hating Turner just as much as one-four-one.
she told you about their multi-year struggle, poking around for a weakness in Turner’s defenses, finding your daddy and you by chance. a perfect avenue to reach Turner’s ego and twist it, provoking him into a full-blown conflict rather than the narrow skirmishes around each other.
when her story slowed, you couldn’t help but say, “i need to ask you something.”
she cocked her head, gaze curious now. “what is it?”
you flushed, avoiding her eyes now. “it’s a bit embarrassing.”
she huffed a gentle laugh. “m’sure i’ve heard worse.”
“is it true that—” you swallowed hard, “—is it true that Simon wanted to have intimate relations with me for revenge against Turner?”
her breath hitched and she shifted against the bed, hand twisting in the quilt. “is that what Ghost told you?”
you nodded, slow, needing to know if what Simon said was real.
he pressed his forehead against yours, warm and solid.
“i said i bedded you for revenge. i lied.”
Kate cursed under her breath. “‘course it’s a lie. he told me himself before he even left for your house to go and take you. he said he didn’t want anythin’ to do with Henry’s daughter.”
she said it with more force than you thought she would, her shoulders tight, but then she relaxed, closing her eyes for a moment. “but, of course, Ghost tells Soap and Gaz things more than he'll ever tell me. and it's mostly because they’re so nosy.”
you cracked a smile at that, trying and failing to imagine Gaz as nosy. only his stoic, serious face and his burly arms crossed over his chest came to mind.
“and that morning of Turner’s social…” the smile slipped from your face as you grimaced. “Simon wasn’t going to leave me at that brothel?”
she shook her head. “no. he said he was givin’ you a chance to change your mind and run. i…”
she looked sheepish now. “i overheard him talking with john. i shouldn’t have but i couldn’t help myself.”
you knew that feeling well, snooping around one-four-one in your time with them.
“why didn’t you run away?” her question was earnest as she peered at you, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to escape the inquiry.
mouth twisted into a scowl, you mulled over it. you had asked yourself the question time and time again, never really able to answer it, but you tried to the best of your ability anyway.
sighing deeply, you said, “i hated living in that small town with my daddy and mama, so i didn’t know where to run to. i didn’t have anywhere to run to. i didn’t have money or a gun. i had never left my home i…”
you grimaced. “i didn’t want to go home. i liked being with you guys.”
maybe it sounded pitiful, finding more comfort in your kidnappers than your own home, but Kate only nodded. after hearing Maria talk about one-four-one, finding more comfort in the local war effort and stray soldiers that filtered into the saloon where she worked, and running off to be a vaquero, you imagined Kate did understand.
“and you really want to stay?” she asked, looking unconvinced of the idea herself.
you didn’t miss a beat, and said, “after everything, yes.”
“we would love it if you did.”
you smiled. “really?”
she nodded. “really. no matter what Ghost says.”
you cocked a brow. “what did he say?”
“oh ya’ know. just the usual things he says when he’s scared.”
she stood from the bed, moving to the door and gently shaking Maria awake. when you still stared at her, feeling confused, she winked at you.
“he lies.”
at that, with her words bidding you goodnight, you turned to the wall again, listening to Kate and Maria and their footsteps and then the shut of the bedroom door.
that night, your nightmares felt lighter than usual.
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it was three weeks since you woke up in Kate and Maria’s farmhouse, four weeks since you met Simon, a week since you finished all of Kate’s paperwork, a week since Maria leave to join the war effort in san francisco, and a week since Kate refused to leave you, incapacitated and healing, alone at the farmhouse no matter how you pleaded and prodded for her to go.
it was four days since you received a thick letter and heavy box in the mail.
you had dumped the contents out over your messy desk, a river of papers flooding out, unbound arm straining with effort just to hold the heavy box up. the skin of your arm was still tender and sore and a flushed pink, littered with textured scars like Kate had warned. at night, you ran your fingers over the leathery surface, discolored and shriveled. your fingers had survived the attack, miraculously, and you flexed them every once in a while just to remind yourself that you could. at least now, the pain wasn’t unbearable.
you carded through the messy pile of paperwork, finding different letters addressed to Henry’s daughter from an accounting company and several major shareholders of your daddy’s saloon chain.
you wondered how they had even found you, or the nearby town, where Kate fetched the mail. you had a very large suspicion Simon had something to do with it, as he usually did.
you had assumed the chain was being handed down to the next largest investor, or your daddy’s share would be split between the shareholders equally. your eyes almost bulged from your head as you read through the letter from your daddy’s attorney.
the saloon chain is yours now, miss.
you read through the line again. unmistakably, the words didn’t shift and morph on the page, and stayed a black bold statement on the paper. you scrambled to go through the rest of the papers, finding more paperwork. paper on your ownership.
your ownership.
slowly, you sat in the desk chair, unbreathing.
the next following days, you sent back eight different letters. one to your daddy’s attorney, who had stated in the letter he wanted nothing to do with your gang-affiliated family again, four different shareholders, one to your daddy’s bank, one to Simon, who had also been a shareholder, despite the fact you had no idea where to address it, and one to Yue-Yi. you addressed it to the brothel, urging her to respond as fast as possible, promising you’d slip away soon and see her as soon as you could.
the promise felt empty and cold.
you wondered if that was how Simon felt—promising you an endless list of things you hoped to believe with a pang of desperation. thoughts of him only circled. when would he come back? would he ever come back? could you believe his promises again?
but you held Kate’s word true above anything. she said that Simon wouldn’t abandon you, that he wasn’t just using your body for revenge. you trusted her.
now, you delved into your daddy’s paperwork, creating a thorough list of important names, contacts, addresses, and deciphered the financial books that needed to be cleaned up. the accounting company had done half the work but you tidied it to the best of your, now, advanced abilities.
you had the materials spread out over the kitchen table, Kate watching you with a careful eye from the living room couch. she clutched at her mug, knee bouncing, foot tapping against the floorboards, periodically glancing from you to the horizon through the windows.
you scribbled down some more notes into the journal Kate lent you before putting down the pen, taking in the women fully. 
“what’s wrong?” you asked, rolling your tense shoulders back. she took a sip from the mug, immersed in a prolonged silence. you could only hear the tick of the clock by the front door.
“Kate.” her gaze finally fell on you, and you were stunned to see the glossy look in them. you softened your voice. “what is it?”
“i’m fine,” she insisted, voice tight and gruff, looking away from you again.
you eyed her for a long moment. you had noticed a difference in her behavior—distant, shifty, impatient, and significantly quieter since Maria left.
you didn’t believe her for a second.
“tell me,” you pressed, and she made a noise of frustration which almost made you feel bad.
she moved to sit at the kitchen table, dragging the chair back in a rough manner, before settling down at the table with a deep scowl. you raised your brows slightly, nudging her under the table with your foot.
“i miss them,” she said, so quiet you almost couldn’t hear her. she turned the mug on the table mindlessly. you followed the movement with your eyes.
“i thought they would be done soon?” you asked, and she only frowned more.
“not soon enough.”
there was that heavy, throbbing in your chest again. you pressed a hand to it, rubbing over the spot, but it didn’t ease. pure, solid dread.
“they’ll be back,” you reassured, totally unsure yourself, mind looping back to Simon as it always seemed to do.
“i miss Maria,” she said with an uncharacteristic sharpness, and you looked up at her, reaching across the table to hold her hand.
“i…” you searched for the words. “i miss Simon as well.”
it felt strange comparing a lover to a friend, but the kind of love Kate seemed to carry for Maria bordered on it. that thought became a strange prick of curious discomfort in your mind, and you waved it away, returning back to the documents spread over the kitchen table.
“John tried to get him to write you,” Kate said, and you stiffened.
“really?”
her foot nudged yours. “‘course, but he refused. John said he’s been mopin’ about all over the place, refusin’ to write anyone and barely talkin’.”
you grimaced at the thought, reading through the document but not absorbing any of the words.
“did John say why?”
you could see her shrug in her peripheral. “it started ever since that austrian guy started hangin’ around.”
your breath hitched, picking your head up to look at her again. “Konig?”
she gave you a strange look. “yeah. he’s helping one-four-one. John said he wants to see you.”
your mouth opened and then closed. that was a development.
“why?”
she shrugged again. “beats me.”
you mourned that John didn’t just write that information to you.
you had barely thought of Konig that past few weeks, despite him apparently saving your life, after almost killing you that night. you shivered at the memory of his cold eyes, revolver shoved under your chin, hand squeezing the air from your throat.
the thought terrified you enough to push it away and immerse yourself in the papers once more. Kate eventually retired to bed, trudging upstairs with a grave face. you kept writing, calculating, solving, in a long cycle till it became impossible to resist the droop of your eyelids.
you had begun to slump forward onto the table, placing your pen and head down for just a second, the soft, lulling tick of the clock a rhythmic snap in your ears till—
you jolted when the german shepherd yapped.
rubbing at your face, you peered over the table, seeing him standing by the door, tail wagging with a ferocity and tongue lolling out. he yapped again, ears flicking towards the door. you squinted out the window, finding nothing but the night pitched into a hazy ink.
a new sort of grating fear bubbled in you at the dog’s persistence. he paced around the entrance, tail still bouncing. you eyed the kitchen cabinets, remembering that Maria had told you the one on the far right had a revolver and ammo.
instead, you neared the window, squinting your eyes, seeing a distant light bobbing over the hill of the plain before many joined it. you pressed your forehead to the window, making out the shapes of horses nearing the farmhouse fast.
you stepped over the dog, opening the front door a crack to listen over the whistling wind. unmistakably, the beating of horse hooves echoed down the plan as well as—
your name.
you scrambled around for the lantern by the front door, striking a match to light it, and holding it up against the darkness as one-four-one and los vaqueros came thundering down the hill.
the dog shot out the door to greet them and you bit back a shriek, almost tripping over his paws before an arm came to hoist you up. Kate materialized beside you, laughing as you strode out to the approached figures, arm in arm.
you realized Soap was the one calling your name, and your heart soared at the sight of him, alive and happy and well and smiling as he slid off his horse, running up to you and Kate to pull both of you into a hearty hug, squeezing too tight. he pulled away to pet the dog who was running around in crazed circles.
your cheeks ached at the big smile stretching your lips.
your gaze swept over the men, at least forty of them, breath hitching at the sight of one, his black stallion stomping in the grass and the silver skull pendant of his stetson glimmering in the low light of the lanterns strung up over his saddle.
Simon’s face was bare, thumbs hooked in his belt, head tilted as he looked at you with a softness, dark eyes illuminated in the firelight. your hands curled into the skirt of your dress, grounding yourself as Gaz and John strode up to greet you and Kate. mindlessly, you spoke back, your eyes still flitting to Simon who turned away to adjust something on his saddle.
then, Alejandro took your hand politely and kissed the back of it with a curling smirk, Rodolfo at his shoulder, who only gave you a curt nod. a slew of vaqueros followed him, including Maria.
you watched in an amazement as Kate immediately yanked her into a hug, hooking around her neck and Maria’s arms snaking around her waist, pulling each other flush together.
but the other half of your attention was trained on the man who continued to fumble with his saddle gear. you edged closer to him, weaving between the vaqueros as they passed, a couple of them tipping their hats that you returned with a polite smile and a nod.
Simon leaned against the horse, looking at you from over his shoulder, face imperceptible and attention trained on you. 
you stopped a marginal distance away, wary of some eyes lingering on the pair of you, hands twisting in your dress.
“not gonna say hello?” you called and his mouth only flattened into a line, making no move towards you.
your heart sank into cataclysmic depths, like all your worst fears had just been confirmed, like Simon had just opened a cavernous chasm between you and him.
he jerked his head to something behind you, something you couldn’t bother to turn and look at, before training his attention back to the straps of his saddlebags.
“we’ve got company.”
confused, you edged closer to him before a big, burly man strode into your path, his pale green eyes crinkled with a smile, and lacking his black mask from the party.
“little lady!” Konig said with a fondness, gripping your shoulders. you stood stiff in his hold, looking up at his crooked, tall nose and curly ginger hair.
“Konig?” you spluttered, and he looked smug at that, as if he was proud you remembered his name.
“your arm—” he reached down to slide the sleeve of your burned arm up, and you reeled back, hissing at the intimate gesture that was wildly inappropriate.
you held the wrist of your wounded arm, feeling a sliver of guilt from the hurt look that flashed across his face. then, you looked to Simon, leaning against his horse, arms crossed over his chest, face stoic and void. 
you hoped for something you couldn’t put your name to, but that hope only deflated when he only shrugged, looking away from you.
you pulled your sleeve up a couple inches and watched Konig take in the marred skin of your arm with a pinched brow.
he took a hand and lightly brushed a finger down your forearm, and when Simon made a disgruntled noise, you pulled away from Konig, jerking the sleeve of your dress with flushed cheeks and a pit of writhing despair in your stomach.
 “when i saw you on the floor in Turner’s mansion with…” Konig frowned, not looking at Simon when he said, “him, i was worried. you might’ve died, liebling.”
from behind Konig, Simon straightened with a tension in his shoulders you had never seen before. save for one-four-one, you had never really heard someone refer to Simon as something lesser than who his reputation portrayed him as—dangerous, deadly, and devilish.
although, as you watched an arrogant smile stretch over Konig’s face, the austrian ginger in front of you seemed no less dangerous and threatening as you thought Simon, or Ghost, to initially be.
that nickname had a bitter taste blooming in your mouth. your eyes flitted to Simon again. it just didn’t stick anymore.
“well, i’m fine, so thank you,” you said, setting your shoulders, jolting when Konig reached up to twirl a strand of your hair between his fingers.
“i know, liebling, you can handle yourself very well,” he said, eyes twinkling, and you couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or not before he was being torn away from you.
Simon dragged the big man back by a handful of his dress shirt, eyes a deadly cool tone and face an eerie calm. you shivered, thinking Simon didn’t really need the mask to be terrifying, as you curled your arms close to your chest.
“that’s enough,” he said, voice gruff as he looked up into Konig’s taller frame.
you realized, with a blink, how strange it was seeing a man taller than Simon.
Konig only scoffed, batting away his hand, neck craning down to get eye level with Simon in a dangerous, menacing manner. “you do not own her, no? little man?”
Simon settled his hand on the revolver lodged in his holster, straightening. “say that again?”
your eyes widened at the spectacle, Simon and Konig almost nose to nose, and you reached out to them in a panic, pushing Konig away from the terrifyingly seething brit who was seconds from drawing his revolver.
“stop it!” you shouted, a dizzying panic flurrying around your mind.
Konig only clutched at your hand on his chest, shifting backwards, and shot a smug look behind you at Simon. you didn’t even dare look back at the expression on Simon’s face, half-worried if you did, you’d see his revolver raised high and aimed right at Konig.
instead, with a frustrated huff, you scolded Konig. “just get inside already!”
Konig flinched, frowning at the harsh tone in your voice, and you only scowled more, wriggling your hand from his grasp. at that, he turned sharply, grumbling something out before descending the rest of the way down the hill in easy, long strides and into the farmhouse—stuffed with people and loud and lit up against the stark night. 
turning back to Simon, who was stock still, face blank, and a hand firmly wrapped around his revolver, you only cocked your brow.
there was a new, writhing anger building in your chest so fierce you almost choked on it. brows furrowed and throat tight, your hand clenched into a tight fist around the skirt of your dress, the very sight of Simon in front of you sending you hurtling toward a razor sharp edge.
“you too,” you hissed, jerking your head towards the farmhouse.
without a word, and a sour look, he snatched up his horse’s reins, and trudged to the farmhouse to tie up his stallion at the pasture fence with the other couple dozen horses.
cross with his erratic behavior, you didn’t wait to go inside with him, instead launching yourself into the messy fray and overcrowded house.
Soap and Gaz poured glasses of bourbon at the kitchen table, swept clean of your documents, and surrounded by more vaqueros knocking back drinks between loud banter. someone played a lively, bumbling tune on the piano that filled the living room with a full sweetness.
it was a miracle to think that only a few hours prior, you and Kate had been missing them all with such a fierceness that there were tears in your eyes. now, searching the room for Kate, you saw her spread over the couch, flush to Maria, explaining a story in slow spanish that had other vaqueros laughing and Maria curling an arm around her shoulders. 
the image only soured when the sight brought you back to thoughts of a certain blonde brute.
you moved to Soap, wriggling between him and Gaz to snatch a glass of bourbon. Soap shouted over the noise with an impish smirk, “you drink now, lass?” 
with a nod, you tipped back the drink, cringing at its burn that pricked your eyes, and Gaz laughed loud and sweet in your ear, obviously drunk as he wrapped a friendly arm around your shoulders.
“missed you, miss,” he said, lips in a wry smile, and you could only smile back.
“let me stick around then?” you offered and Soap nodded eagerly, pressing his knuckles to your shoulder in a friendly gesture.
“we were plannin’ on it!”
John materialized behind you to untangle Gaz’s arm from your shoulders, much more sober than the other two men as he reached around you to grab a glass with a wink.
“good to see you, darlin’.”
feeling indulgent and mellow, you pulled him into a quick hug, and he pressed a palm firm to your back with a laugh.
“Ghost’s been dyin’ to talk to you,” he said, tipping his hat to the man sulking across the room with Alejandro and Rodolfo who were locked in conversation. you spared him a quick glance, seeing his arms crossed over his chest and staring off into an untrained point, not at all enjoying the lively atmosphere of the room. just the sight of him sent slithering curls of something crawling under your skin.
“well he hasn’t been acting like it,” you said, not even trying to filter the exasperation from your tone.
John only raised his brows, sipping at the bourbon. “since when does he ever act true to how he feels?”
sending him a look, he only smiled with a shrug, turning away to disappear through the crowd of cowboys. 
you sidled up beside Kate and Maria instead, the women inviting you into the couch with open arms, and you listened in on their conversations—a muddled mix of english and spanish. a vaquero got your attention, conversing with you in a strained english and a mix of sign language that had you both keeling over with laughter at the bizarre form of communication.
across the room, Simon’s burning, dark gaze on you caught your eye, and between exchanging words with the friendly vaqueros, your eyes fluttered to him. he was leaned against the wall, Soap flanking him now, Gaz leaning an arm over his shoulder, as they prodded Alejandro and Rodolfo in loud, tipsy voices, but his eyes never left you.
you leaned forward in your seat, elbows braced against your knees, and conscious of the way your loose blouse dipped, exposing an indecent amount of your skin as you swept your hair to one side of your shoulder, brushing against your neck.
he cocked his head, deep, murky eyes roaming down, and then back up to your gaze. 
you don’t know whether you should be mad at Simon or not. you couldn’t decide what was more logical—the seething tick in your mind, or the horrible ache in your body for his touch. the sliver of affection you craved from him.
Simon pushed off the wall, and you were about to stand when Konig, much bigger than you, squeezed into the spot next to you by the couch, his arm braced against the back of it.
“i’m sorry, liebling,” he said suddenly, and you stilled, sinking back down into the cushions. “i couldn’t help myself earlier.”
“that guy—” he tipped his head towards Simon, who was stock still, hands curling into fists around his holster, “—is a nuisance.”
you scoffed at that, playing a long for a bit, and enjoying Simon’s attention on you with a mouthful of guilt you swallowed down quickly. you decided that being mad at him was more logical.
“really? i heard he’s not fond of you either, mister,” you said with a smirk, mind buzzing around as you took another swig of bourbon. he watched you with a wicked smile. 
“i did not know you could handle so much alcohol, little lady.”
you shrugged. “neither did i, sir.”
he cocked his head, leaning so his shoulder was pressed against yours, and a distant, fuzzy call in your brain told you to move away, but your sense of direction was muted and muddled with the buzz in your mind.
“i heard rumors about you,” he admitted, and your brows only rose as you slurped down more bourbon. “that Ghost had stolen Turner’s property.”
that irked you, and you put down the glass on the coffee table stacked with other half-empty glass cups, wiping at the back of your mouth.
“no,” you said, with a strange drawl. “m’not Turner’s property.”
his gaze was long and imperceptible. “i also heard that Ghost owns you. is that true?”
your breath hitched, brows pinching together. “s’not your business.”
“is it true?” he pressed, and you shoved him away a bit, standing and weaving between some dancing vaqueros to get away from him.
but he only followed, snatching at your wrist, catching your bad arm and jerking you back with a tight grip. you clawed at his hand.
“lemme go—” you said, struggling between the drunk bodies, but he only grabbed your hip with the other hand, forcing you still. a new panic rose in you.
“just, listen, liebling, i don’t wanna hurt you—”
“well you are—!” you shouted, on the verge of giving his hand a good, strong bite, when an ear-splintering bang filled the room.
you screamed, clutching at your ear with your free arm, and a rush of sawdust came down over you and the wildly sober vaqueros around you that drew their revolvers with a scramble. there were a pair of dark brown eyes over Konig’s shoulder.
“let go.”
Simon was just behind Konig, revolver aimed high at the ceiling, coming down to press right against the pulse point in Konig’s neck, gloved finger heavy on the trigger.
Simon’s face was rigid, calm and cold, jaw clenched tight, but his eyes swirled with something sinister and so menacing, you wanted to reel away. the music of the room was dead now, all eyes trained on the two men, and you in Konig’s grasp.
Konig stared down at you, face blank, but pale green eyes strained. you saw them flick up behind you, then around the room, and only seeing a dozen revolvers staring back. you could see Gaz creep up in your peripheral, gun trained on Konig, and with a low, frustrated noise, he released you.
you immediately scrambled back, your muddled mind throbbing with a sharp clarity now, and you looked between Simon, seething, and Konig, face downcast and turned away with a clenched jaw. a familiar burn pricked you eyes, and you swallowed around the tight vice of your throat, chest thick and laden and aching.
“you—”
you choked on your words, unable to find what to say before you were barreling out the farmhouse, Simon shouting your name in your wake.
you didn’t turn to see if he was following you, crushing your hands to your ears as more tears spilled down your face. eerily, you were reminded of your dream, jerking away when you felt someone’s hand at your back, only rushing up the hill faster, not bothering to hike up your dress over the grassy plain.
wracking sobs left your throat, and you felt confused, the wetness blurring your vision, and ragged breaths making your head spin. why were you crying?
you collapsed into the grass, trying to catch your short, ragged breath, but there was such a tightness in your throat that you couldn’t force any air through.
when you realized you couldn’t breathe, you clutched at your throat, screwing your eyes shut as the world spun and wild, frenzied panic consuming you.
all your nightmares came flying back to you. Turner, Charles, the men you had killed, demonic twists and a thick, sandy sludge, the world burning around you and one-four-one with it, Yue-Yi, broken and bloodied, and your daddy and mama. gone and dead.
and Simon—evil and full of hate.
arms wrapped you into a solid body, smelling smokey and woody and earthy, Simon’s deep voice in your ear. 
“shhh. it’s alright.”
his hand snuck around to your chest, right where that throbbing, painful ache of dread was, and his big palm rubbed over it, the warmth of his hand seeping right down to your bones.
you choked on your sobs and his voice was soft. “deep breaths.”
he breathed against you, strong and steady, and you tried and failed to match the slow drag of each one with a shaky inaccuracy, chest stuttering and whole body shaking violently. he moved you down slow, sitting you so you were between his legs and back flush against his chest, pulling you against him in a tight hold that became an anchor.
you clutched at the wrist of his sleeve with desperation.
“hurts,” you forced through painful gasps, and the warmth of his cheeks was against the side of your head.
“where?” his voice was harsh and intense now.
you slapped a hand over his at your chest, willing it to move it in those small, soothing circles that slowed the shallow, sharp gasps wrenched through your constricted lungs.
“what can i do?” he asked, a sharp edge of desperation slipping into his voice, and you could only cry, letting him rock you gently.
time stretched, agonizing and forever and never-ending, till your breaths finally, finally slowed, and the flashing kaleidoscopic dance behind your eyelids faded, lungs aching with an acute pain.
“you didn’t write me,” you said between sniffles and sharp, uncontrollable gasps, and he let out a low, tortured and broken noise, wrapping around your body tighter.
“i wasn’t sure if you wanted me to.”
you wanted to scream. “of course i did,” you almost sobbed. “i was so worried for you, i thought i’d-i’d die. i missed-missed you more than anything.”
another strangled sound of frustration left him, and he shifted you in his arms, still tight and warm around you, but enough so you could peer up into his shattered face, a foreign gloss in his eyes you’d never seen before.
“i almost didn’t survive without you,” he said, voice strained and hushed, and you wanted to slap him, but your whole body felt leaden and too light.
“i thought about you everyday,” he admitted, nuzzling his nose against your cheek, and you let him, screwing your eyes shut. “i couldn’t get you off my mind. i thought about you almost every second.”
“i don’t believe you,” you said, voice shaky, but he shook his head against you.
“then don’t take my word for it. ask Price. ask Soap or Gaz. they’ll tell you.”
“i’m so mad at you,” you said, a rage clawing up your throat and mixing with the dizzy grief of your body.
he said nothing so you pressed further. “i can’t believe you. you left me here. you’re still injured, and you left me at that brothel. i thought we were dead in Turner’s mansion,” then voice breaking, you remembered, “my daddy and mama. they’re dead—”
you worked yourself up again, choking, and Simon soothed you with soft hushes, your body wound up tight.
“i wanted to leave here,” you said in a panic, “i wanted to leave.”
“wasn’t safe,” he retaliated, his lips against your neck, and that only made you angrier.
“i don’t care.” tears slipped down your cheeks that he quickly brushed away. 
“i thought you wanted to be with me all the time,” you said, grief shattering over you like glass.
he turned you and pressed your body down softly into the grass, caging you between his arms, and you wrapped around him easily, arms around his neck, legs winding around his hips as he crushed you down to the earth.
the solid weight of his body calmed every loud thing clattering through your broken mind.
“i always have,” he admitted lowly, face pressed to that spot where your hair pooled against your neck. “i needed to fix things in san francisco. now, the city’s yours.”
he pulled back, and you looked up into his warm brown eyes that were splintered and honest. “i’ll give you anything. you can have the whole city and you can be with me all the time. everything’s safe now. no one can hurt you. no one can hurt us anymore.”
with two fistfuls of his shirt, you tugged him back down to you, and he burrowed into your touch, arms coiling around your waist and pulling tight.
“just be with me,” you gritted out, your hand clutching at the softness of his hair, and he only let out a coarse, affirming noise, stock still and like a rock.
you curled into him—something you could anchor to as your eyes slid shut.
“i dreamed about you,” you rambled, and he laxed further into you, but then tensed when you said, “nightmares.”
his voice was strained. “like what?”
“it was different than this,” you said, mind hazy and fatigued, “none of this ever happened. you were never an outlaw and we lived in your cabin in the woods and we were married.”
“if that’s what you want,” he shot out, fingers curling into your hair, “i’ll give it to you.”
he deflated when you shook your head.
“you were evil,” you whispered, and he flinched, before you finished, “but i knew it wasn’t you.”
he pulled back again, leaning over you. his face was shadowed in the night, lips screwed into a tight line, but you could still make out the curve of his features.
“i prefer you like this,” you admitted, brushing your fingertips along his bare face, thumb tracing over the silvery scar on his upper lip. “an outlaw. the scars.”
“you’re crazy,” he said with a tinge of wonder, and you almost smiled at that, melting when he stooped down to kiss you softly.
his lips were warm, and you gripped at his hair, pushing his head further into you. it felt too brief once he pulled away.
“could you ever forgive me?” he asked.
you looked at him for a long moment, feeling all muddled with unease. the better question was, could you ever trust him again?
“maybe.”
he nodded, betraying nothing but the cold, hard lines of his face.
“can i at least carry you?”
“i can walk myself,” you insisted, though not unkindly, as you pushed him off you. the big, heavy man giving easily to your touch and he stood, offering a hand that you took, and lifting you with an ease.
you walked side by side in silence, only the soft rustle of the prairie grass pulled by the wind filling the darkness, the farmhouse still lit like a beam and vaqueros snaking through the interior.
when you neared, Simon snuck an arm around your waist, and you quickly wiped at any stray tears on your face, fixing your hair and pulling at the new wrinkles of your dress. Kate was standing by the door, arms crossed over her chest.
“you shot a hole through my ceiling, Riley,” she called, brow furrowed with irritation. Simon stiffened beside you.
“i’ll fix it.”
she gave him a long look void of sympathy. “not with those injuries you won’t.”
then, her eyes were on you, and she softened. “are you alright, angel?”
you cleared your throat, nodding with a quiet hum, and Simon inched closer to you.
she shot him one last nasty, dirty look, turning on her heel and reentering the party. you felt a creeping awkwardness with all the eyes crawling over you and Simon’s possessive hold, hyper aware of Konig's gaze from across the room, splayed out in an armchair as he took swigs of a flask.
“party’s over,” Kate shouted over the music, glancing briefly at you. “lights out in five minutes.”
you mouthed a thanks to her, and she only shrugged with a light smile as the men in the room grumbled, taking glasses and bottles of bourbon with them as they moved to their horses outside the farmhouse. you watched through the window as they unpacked blankets and rolled them out over the grass, some trekking towards the barn to take cover in for the night. 
you watched a half-awake and intoxicated Soap struggle into a sleeping bag, Gaz already passed out near his feet and curled up in some blankets. John was only a couple feet away and staring up into the night sky.
you jolted when you noticed Konig stop a comfortable distance from you, standing in front of the farmhouse entrance and gaze trained outside. Simon sidled up closer to you, leaning against the window with crossed arms and a furrowed, serious look.
“sorry liebling,” he said with a shrug and a distant expression before taking another swig of his flask, not looking at you as he walked out the door to his horse strung up along the fencepost.
staring after him, Simon reached out to touch your cheek, and your eyes snapped to his. looking over his face, the soft moonlight poured over it, as Kate moved around the living room to put out the oil lamps. you brushed your fingers along his strong jaw, watching in amazement how it flexed under your touch.
“we’re sleepin’ outside.”
you startled with a muffled squeak, stepping towards Simon, and he easily wrapped an arm around your waist as you twisted to look back at a smug looking Kate and a tipsy looking Maria by her shoulder.
you flushed deeply, a fluttering heat in your cheeks.
“goodnight,” you said, and Kate’s smirk only grew, as she pulled Maria out the door.
“sweet dreams,” she called, a knowing lilt in your voice that only made you blush deeper.
you jolted when you felt Simon press his cool lips to your flushed skin.
“tired?”
you nodded weakly, and he smiled against your cheek.
“you sleep,” he said, patting your sides. “i’m gonna wash up.”
hesitating, the man skirted around you and headed towards the stairs, waiting at the foot of them with an expectant look over his shoulder as he watched you move to your bedroom door.
he cleared his throat, shifting from foot to foot. “night.”
you bit down on your lip, hand fidgeting around the door knob. “good night.”
you watched him walk up the stairs, heavy boots clunking against each step, a well of disappointment blooming in your mouth.
lips twisting into a scowl, you opened the door and shut it behind you too loud, not looking for Simon’s last look in the darkness.
you crawled over the bed, huffing out in frustration as you rolled in the sheets, on the verge of punching your pillow, before sliding off your bed in defeat and redressing in your thin nightgown and pushing aside the messy stacks of papers lining your room, building in an unattractive pile on your desk.
sliding into the bedsheets, you turned to the wall, feeling strange with Kate’s vacancy at your back. you rolled over and fiddled with the bedsheets, careful on your healing arm.
you had been so tired mere hours ago and now you couldn’t even shut your eyes, and you mourned it, wriggling in the sheets with restlessness and craving for something…
you eyed the door of the bedroom. you had been so mad at Simon only moments ago, the way a cataclysmic divide manifested as soon as he arrived, his immature, jealous squabbles, his ignorance, his stupidity, his strange self-destructive logic that involved pushing you away that persisted for the past three long, torturous weeks…
you would never stop being mad at him. you weren’t even sure if you could ever trust him, but, maybe, you realized, you wanted him close nonetheless.
you felt like you were thinking with a new clarity when you lurched off the bed, throwing off the quilt, and striding to the door, your hand in mere inches of the door when it was wrenched open.
with a surprised squeak, you looked up to see Simon standing there, dripping with water and holding up a towel around his waist, blonde hair tangled and matted against his forehead.
your eyes immediately slid down to the width of his hips, his deep v-line and the definition of his stomach, the bullet wound healing nicely with a healthy flush and new stitches. you bit back a gasp when you looked over the right side of his upper chest and shoulder—an angry, tender looking fleshiness that must’ve been painful.
he slowly stepped into the room, dark eyes on you, as he closed the door behind him and edged you closer to the bed with every step.
you almost whimpered, shuffling backwards, Simon looming tall and broad over you, and it wasn’t anything like that scary dream you had weeks ago. a slithering ache that you hadn’t felt in weeks return to the lower regions of your body.
he reached out, snaking a hand behind your head into your hair and gently pulling you to him in a kiss that you eagerly returned. 
wrapping your arms around his neck, stretching through your tiptoes to reach him, he made a low, carnal sound in the back of his throat that had you squirming in his grasp.
“is this okay?” he asked between kisses, and you only hummed a pleasant yes, enamored by the soft movement of his practiced mouth, your legs going jittery.
he wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you flush to him to keep you steady, tongue pressing against your lower lip.
you squeaked, jerking back with a jolt of confusion.
he only smiled, voice rough and low. “never kiss someone before, princess?”
you flushed, mumbling, “yes. you,” with embarrassment, before trying to pull him back down by his neck, but he didn’t budge, smile growing wider.
“let me teach you?” he practically purred, and you blushed with a shy nod, letting him hoist you onto the edge of the bed with a yelp, your hand accidentally sliding against his raw shoulder.
he winced, and you snatched your arm back, squeaking a sorry but he just shook his head with an impatience, dragging you forward by your hips closer to him, your hands pressed to the wet skin of his torso as he nuzzled his nose against yours.
“part your lips, pretty girl,” he said, voice a low, seductive rumble, and you immediately complied, letting him lean forward and slide his tongue between your lips.
you startled at new feeling, flinching away, but he pulled you back in with a softness that had you melting, and you tried to match the wet, slick movements of his tongue with your own.
he hummed in approval, angling his head to kiss you deeper, and you almost thought you saw stars, heart thudding too fast against your chest. it was strangely hot and sensual and the sensation of it only spurred on a curiosity in you.
when he leaned back for a breath, you only felt disappointed and lurched forward to bite his lower lip, willing him to stay right there against your lips.
he let out a low groan and you jolted at the vibration that traveling straight from his throat into your own, pulling whimpers from you. that seemed to only urge him on, because his grip on your the back of your head tightened, pushing your head to his so your noses pressed together, the movement of his lips, tongue, and teeth aggressive now.
once your head spun, dizzy and light, you pressed against his chest and he finally parted from you. he was panting, lips swollen with a redness that you reached out to touch in the darkness, brushing a forefinger over his lower lip that he kissed, then kissed down your palm, the underside of your wrist, up your arm until his lips were suddenly on your neck.
your moans were involuntary, drawn from your throat like magic as Simon worked your body, fingertips slowly tracing up your thighs beneath your nightgown.
he let out a noise of surprise against your neck. “no undergarments?”
you flushed, shaking your head, and he hummed in approval, searching the skin of your legs with his palms till he found that sticky, wet source that pulsed with an ache. you squirmed against his touch, gasping when he found your clit, thumb against it, and two big fingers stretched your core as they slowly pushed in.
he pumped them between your thighs, lips and tongue and teeth still sucking along your neck and the underside of your jaw, then licking over your ear. you shook in his hold, clutching onto his forearms for purchase, head tipping back from the feel of his fingertips rubbing sensitive spots inside you that had your breath sharp and full of gasps.
“want you to come on my fingers first,” he whispered, licking over your cheek, “can you do that, pretty thing?”
you nodded eagerly, rolling your hips down onto the delicious circles rubbed around your clit and the shooting pleasure each time he pressed against that sweet spot inside you.
“more,” you whined, eyes closed, and he huffed a laugh.
“more? more what? this not enough?”
“no,” you gasped, dragging your nails down his abdomen to the edge of his towel. with half-lidded eyes, you eyed the spot curiously, then blinked up at Simon, and he just smirked, leaning down to kiss you again.
“patience, princess.”
you screwed your eyes shut, the sensations over your entire body overstimulating—his hand gently tugging at your hair, his hot tongue against your own, and your hips rolling down to the sensual movements of his other hand.
it was too much, and soon you were gasping, muscles bunching and then releasing as you came all over his fingers with pitchy moans that he swallowed into his mouth.
he didn’t waste a second to push you down over the bed, flipping up your nightgown and bunching it in a hand against your stomach, dropping to his knees at the edge of the bed. tugging your forward by your hips, his tongue was against your folds in an instant and you squirmed with little squeaks, twitching with sensitivity. but he was so much stronger than you, pinning you down to the bed easily, blonde head between your thighs.
you gripped at his hair, tugging, as your back arched against the hot, wet movements against your cunt. it was overwhelming. too good.
“Simon,” you gasped, and he just hummed in response, tongue sliding into you and reaching up to press his thumb to your twitchy little clit.
“missed hearin’ you say my name like that, pretty,” he said between kisses against your cunt, dark eyes flitting up to gaze at you, half-lidding and smokey.
that same sweet feeling unfurled in your chest so much faster than you expected, and you had no time to warn him before your core was convulsing, thighs tightening around his head as your hips bucked up into his mouth.
but he wouldn’t stop, even after your body started shaking, and you pulled at his hair, little gasps and whimpers of pleas to stop. finally, after a loud, pitched whine left your lips, he suckled against your clit one last time before popping off.
there was a reflective wetness over his jaw that made you blush, a stupid smile on his face and hazy, dark eyes flitting over your body, splayed out, twitching, and completely unwound.
you chided him. “greedy.”
he laughed, crawling up over your to kiss you, a strange salty and sweet taste on his tongue that had your stomach twisting with want again. when he pulled away, you licked over the wetness on his chin and jaw and he groaned, pushing you down to the bed with a hand against your neck.
“you…” he gaze was so hot and wanting that you shivered, clutching at the loose grip of his hand around your throat.
“you don’t even know what you do to me,” he whispered, and you licked your lips, tasting the last of the wetness. he eyed the movement with an intensity.
“i have an idea,” you whispered back, reaching down to grip at the edge of his towel again, and he smirked.
he slid off you, letting his towel drop to the floor, and you eyed his swollen length with a greediness, whimpering just at the sight of it.
already, your cunt was pulsing back to life with a wild aching desire. you squirmed against the bed.
“please?” you offered him, and he only gave you an amused look.
“please what?”
he crept over you, knuckles pressing to the bed beside your head. you spread your legs wider.
“please,” you whimpered, and his brows raised slightly.
“i don’t know what you want,” he said, low and grating, and you huffed with frustration, pressing your heel to the back of his thigh to push him further forward. but he wouldn’t budge.
“want…” you looked between his legs, shivering, and he hummed, shifting his hips forwards so that he was flush to the back of your thighs, length brushing against your cunt. you gasped, bucking your hips up.
his gaze was imperceptible, just dark and wanting, head tilted. “want my cock?”
you whined, nodding, reaching down to rub your fingers gently against the head of it where that milky substance was spilling out over your stomach. he made a noise of disapproval, snatching your wrist and pinning it above your head.
“use your words.”
“want you to fuck me,” you whispered with a blush, glancing down at his cock again, and he went still.
“supposed to save that for marriage, lovely,” he said, voice honest and soft as he brushed a palm against your cheek. you looked up at him and the tender look on his face, jaw clenched, but his eyes still blown wide with need.
“it doesn’t matter,” you said, before adding in a whisper, “i’m already yours.”
you wanted to say that you needed him—desperately needed him close, but you bit the words back, hoping he would understand.
it seemed that he did from the way he pushed your nightgown up, pulling you up so he could gently tug it over your head and throw it to the floor. he immediately eased you back down, lips roaming your bare skin, his lips over your chest, breasts, and stomach, hot and overstimulating. you clutched at his hands holding your hips down.
“hurry,” you whimpered, and he reached down to stroke his cock before sliding it between the sticky, wet folds of your cunt, catching against your entrance.
then, he hesitated and you almost wanted to scream in frustration. “remember that it hurts?”
there was a distant, little spark of fear inside you, but you were so impatient that you almost didn’t care. 
“just… please, Simon.”
he leaned down to kiss you briefly. “relax. m’not going anywhere, pretty.”
that eased a place in your chest that you didn’t know was panicking, and you laxed back into the mattress, letting him touch you where he pleased as you wrapped your arms around his neck. his hands smoothed over the skin of your torso, then pressed your legs wider.
“take a deep breath for me, sweet girl.” 
you complied, letting your eyes shut and you took a deep breath, the air punched from your lungs when you felt something impossibly thick pushing past the rim of your entrance. you couldn’t breath, nails sinking into his skin.
“good girl,” he mumbled against your skin, voice soft as he pressed even softer kisses to your neck and shoulders. “doin’ so good for me.”
the pain was sharp and uncomfortable, growing as he stretched you even wider. tears pricked in your eyes and he immediately kissed them away.
“want me to stop?”
you shook your head, eyes screwed shut, hands snaking into his hair to pull at it and somehow ease the pain. “no. please.”
his fingers were brushing against your jaw. “look at me, pretty girl.”
your eyes fluttered open, a tear escaping down your cheek as you looked up to him. his eyes darted over your face, a crease of worry in between his brows that you willed away with your thumb, pressing against it.
he stooped down to kiss you, swallowing your gasp when his hips pushed forward a little more, and suddenly his hips were flush to the back of your thighs, an overwhelming, throbbing fullness in your stomach. he was crammed against that swollen spot inside you that had your head falling back, seeing stars.
“alright?” 
you nodded slowly, swallowing, and ground your hips against him experimentally, a new sort of pleasure racing down your spine. he let out a low sound, gripping your hips to still them.
“not yet,” he scolded, “you need to relax more. i don’t wanna hurt you, princess.”
he reached between you to rub at your clit in gentle circles, and you squirmed a little, feeling impatient.
“relax,” he reminded you, and you bit back your frustration, letting him wrap your legs around his waist.
he leaned back, enough so the moonlight from the window spilled over his muscled body, and you could see the light catch in his smokey eyes. he tilted his head, gaze full of affection as he traced a thumb over your throat.
you held his hand, moving it to clasp around your throat and pressing your heels into his back. that unbearable stretch inside you had turned achy with want, and that sweet spot inside you begged for some kind of stimulation.
“ready?” he asked softly, and you hummed a yes, watching the way his hips drew back a little and then snapped forward again, gasping when he pushed against that amazing sweet spot in you again.
then he did it again, and again, and every time it bunched a breathy moan from your lips till he was building a pace, and you couldn’t stop the little whimpers falling from your lips, clutching at his hand wrapped around your throat, using it as leverage to pull you back down on every thrust. it left your mind hazy and dizzy, your other hand searching the sheets for something to hold onto.
he leaned down, grabbing your hand and pushing it to the bed, his rough fingers interlocked with yours.
“good?” his gaze was hot and piercing.
“mhmm,” you hummed, infatuated with the strange pleasurable stretch between your hips and the rolling, hot waves of pleasure in time with his hips that overwhelmed you completely.
“pretty girl,” he said, tightening his grip around your throat, though his voice was so distant and he felt so far.
“closer,” you mumbled, and his movements slowed.
“hm? speak up, sweet thing.” 
“closer,” you whined, eyes glossy and fluttering your eyelashes up at him.
he shifted above you, dropping down so he was caging your head between his forearms, pressing you down into the mattress with a pleasurable weight that had your head spinning. you wrapped around him tighter, reaching around his sides to clutch at the muscles of his back so your chests were flush together.
“better?” he asked, pecking your nose softly, and eyes so warm and full that you shuddered.
you nodded and craned your neck up to offer your lips for a kiss that he took eagerly, tongue slipping into your mouth, his hips rolling down into the hot clutch of your heat.
you gasped at the sensation, his thrusts more shallow, deeper, than before—cock so thick that you were pulsing around him in time with his thrusts. it’s like you could feel him in your ribcage, hammering against the quick thud of your heart.
overwhelmed, your nails sunk into his back, and he let out a low groan, ducking down to whisper in your ear.
“so tight, princess.”
you moaned, only tightening at his words, and that spurred him on, fucking you faster with a dizzying pace now, hips slamming so hard against yours the pain mixed into a muddled pleasure—
“Simon,” you gasped, clawing at his back, and you could feel his smirk against your skin.
“yeah that’s it. say my name, pretty girl.”
you did, gasping it under your breath with each of his rough thrusts, a familiar burn building in the crux of your stomach.
“Si—m’gonna—”
“shh, don’t talk, just take it,” he whispered, low and throaty and voice grating.
your moans were breathy now, coming in short bursts, as more overwhelming waves of pleasurable sensations hit you, burning you inside and out.
“fuck,” he growled, hand closing into fists around the sheets by your head.
you peered up at him to the best of your ability, eyes half-lidded and drooping, watching the clench of his abdominal muscles with every thrust, his body in a sheen of sweat and brows furrowed with concentration, dark eyes boring down at you with a predatory gaze.
want you to come all over this big cock, princess. come for my lovely, just come luvie, come—
on command, your whole body contracted, bright lights flashing behind your eyelids as you shook with a couple last breathy moans, Simon’s words swept away somewhere far and distant as you peaked on a delicious high.
you were crashing through it, barely registering his gentle words in your ear.
good girl. good girl. my good girl.
once you were coming back down, dizzy and sleepy, Simon’s thrusts had grown shallow and slow, moaning lowly when he pulled out and pumped his cock quickly, those white ropes spurting over your stomach in hot, sticky layers before he crashed down over you again.
you drifted through a dreamscape, humming lightly at the feeling of his hot skin against yours.
you traced over his shoulders, avoiding his burn wound carefully, listening to the pant of his breath slow, and then still, as you laid there tangled together.
you brushed a hand through his hair, carding your fingers over his scalp and scratching lightly. with a low hum, he shifted his head to look at you, face relaxed and content and his nose pressed against your breast.
“satisfied, princess?”
you tried and failed to bit back a smile, nodding slowly. he smirked back, playing with the ends of your hair.
“insatiable, greedy thing.”
you couldn’t help but giggle, tugging him up to your face, and he relented, smushing your cheek with his nose and lips. with little squeaks and giggles, you swatted at him when he crushed you down into the bed with too much force until he pulled back.
he slid into the space between you and the wall, tucking you into his chest and arms locking around you in a hold that felt possessive.
once you were settled and content, his lips against your hair, you asked him, “are you satisfied?”
he brushed some fingers along the scars of your arm for a pause. “mhmm.”
the sound was unconvincing, and some part inside you broke a little. you turned in his arms so you could see his face.
“don’t lie…”
he scoffed but looked amused. “you make a man greedy, princess.”
you tilted your head. “what do you mean?”
he kissed your forehead softly. “i wanted it to be different.”
you almost deflated, heart dropping into your stomach and skin growing icy cold.
“what do you mean?” you asked again, voice flat now. he peered down at you, blonde lashes full and long in the moonlight.
“in different circumstances. after your marriage.”
your throat tightened. “my marriage? do you mean…?”
he looked away from you when he mumbled, “our marriage.”
“why? was it not good?” you felt a spiral of panic. “do you care about… virginity?”
he only gave you a wry smile. “‘course i don’t care. you’re perfect just like this.”
his eyes darted down to your body, and you followed his gaze, suddenly conscious of your bare skin against his, and the remnants of your shared pleasure still sticky against your stomach.
with a blush, you grumbled, “what’s the problem then?”
he pulled you closer to him. “s’what you deserve.”
you wanted to scream. “i don’t get it,” you whined and he chuckled, tucking his chin over your head.
“you’re such a good, innocent girl. you deserved all that…” he spoke so low you almost couldn’t hear him, “...doting marriage stuff first.”
you pushed him back by his chest, and he blinked down at you, confused. when he reached to pull you against him again, you kept your arm extended, and he gripped at your hip instead.
“do you really want to marry me?” you asked softly, and you watched him swallow hard, before nodding slowly.
“if you’ll have me.”
there was a bitter taste in your mouth. innocent, good girl.
“even after everything?”
he tilted his head against the pillows, stroking your side. “what’s wrong, lovely?”
you struggled with the words. “i’ve killed people.”
he only blinked. “me too.”
“i felt happy when Turner died,” you admitted, the words sounding so foreign on your tongue that you wanted to puke. “you haven’t seen me kill someone.”
his brows rose slightly. “i can imagine it’s a sight.”
you felt frustrated, unable to keep yourself from confessing, “i’m having mental issues.”
you screwed your eyes shut, unwilling to see his reaction, thinking back to just prior when you ran from the farmhouse. Simon had witnessed it with his own eyes. he had seen just how insane you were. there had been one old man in your town who was insane, saying he saw things, always switching between hyperactivity, anger, and isolating himself to lie in bed all day. then, they eventually took him to an insane asylum when he had an episode in public.
you shook just at the thought of it, jolting when you felt Simon’s soft lips against your brow.
“yeah?”
your eyes snapped open, brows pinched together as you looked up into his relaxed expression. “yeah? that’s all?”
he shrugged. “me too.”
your throat felt dry. “what do you mean?”
he pointed to his own throat. “not bein’ able to breath. racing thoughts. uncontrollable crying. it happens, lovely.”
your mind spun but he continued on. “how long has it been happening?”
“since that night on the train,” you chewed out, feeling light and airy and scared when he paled in response.
“when we fought?” he asked, face pinched and stormy. you nodded and he wrapped you up in his arms again, tightly squeezing. despite your grumbles of protest, you whole body melted, a wet burn in your eyes.
“i’m sorry,” he gasped, crushing you, and from the strain in his voice, you knew he was being sincere.
“i have this feeling, ” you started, then choked, unsure of how to finish. 
“tell me,” he prompted and you pressed your forehead against his strong chest.
“it’s in my chest. it’s heavy all the time. kind of like dread, but not really.” you screwed your eyes shut. “i hate it.”
he rubbed a hand over your back. “i know it well.”
“you do?” you squeaked, so sure that there was no one else in the world who felt a sliver of semblance to you.
“mhmm. breathing helps.” he snaked a hand between you, rubbing his fist in slow circles over your chest. “this helps too.”
as promised, your body relaxed, the touch warm and a pleasant pressure against the thrum of your heavy heart.
you reached up, wanting to return the favor, and rubbed your own palm against his broad chest. he smiled softly, snatching your hand up to kiss all over it, and you squirmed at the ticklish sensation, swatting him away.
he laughed, pushing you onto your back so he could slide off the bed.
“let me carry you?” he offered, but you just shook your head, swinging your legs over the edge.
“i’m fine—” your toes touched the cold floor, and you put a generous among of pressure onto your feet, before your knees buckled, legs shaking.
with a yelp, you almost tumbled to the floor before Simon easily caught you.
“careful,” he said, sounding too happy, and you sent him a dirty look.
“you did this on purpose, didn’t you?” you gritted out, clutching onto his arms, and he only scoffed, shaking his head with an amused look.
nonetheless, you hooked an arm around his unwounded shoulder, letting him curl an arm beneath your knees and haul you up into his arms.
he left your room to trudge up the stairs to the bathroom, and you couldn’t be more grateful for the dark, because as much as you protested it to Simon, he couldn’t seem to care less if someone spotted you both bare in the night. you protested enough for him to throw his towel over you before leaving your room.
he sat you down on the counter of the sink and filled the bathtub with water, peering at you softly over his shoulder every once and a while. once it was filled, he picked you up again, and gingerly set you down in the lukewarm water before sliding in right behind you.
it was a cramped space, your back pressed to his chest, and his legs around your own, so long that his toes were against the other wall of the tub.
“comfy?” he asked, and you nodded as he reached around you for a bar of soap and a washcloth, gently washing away the after effects of the intimate night you shared together.
for once, you realized, you didn’t feel an ounce of guilt for what you had done. even if he wasn’t your husband, and even if your mama had taught you against it your entire life, as you sunk back into Simon, you found yourself absolutely uncaring for what sins you had committed.
maybe things changed when you really, truly believed he was going to die. you looked up, finding Simon already peering down at you, and reached out to touch his jaw gently.
he took your arm, cleaning it gently, thumb brushing over its marred scars. he brought it up to press his lips against the scars that stretched over its surface, face twisted and somber.
“Turner tried to trap me in that room with him,” you said, voice almost at a whisper. “i fell and my arm went straight into fire.”
he made a low noise of disapproval, but you continued anyway. 
“it was almost like he didn’t want to live,” you ruminated, remembering the way Turner had promised, if you try to kill me, you’ll burn with me.
he was half-right in the end.
“he didn’t even try,” you said, “threw away his gun almost immediately. just tried to strangle me.”
Simon’s arm curled around you and rubbed a palm over your chest. you clutched at it gratefully.
“i’d say i would kill him,” he said, voice so soft it was betraying, “but you already did that. you handle yourself well, little gunslinger.”
you almost giggled. “little gunslinger?”
“mhmm.” he picked up the washcloth again, wiping over your stomach and between your thighs under the water. “little gunslinger.”
“what’s my code name then?”
he mulled over that for a moment before saying, “Angel.”
your brows rose a little. “Angel? like the devil’s Angel?”
you peered at him from over your shoulder, taking in his stupid, lopsided smile with a cocked brow, and he only leaned forward to kiss you softly.
“that’s exactly what you are, princess.”
you hummed. “what about my mask?”
he smiled against your lips. “don’t need one anymore. 
you parted from him. “why not?”
“no one to be afraid of anymore,” he said, tracing a finger over your lips.
and you were grateful for it because you could look at his face—all bare and handsome—as much as you wanted now.
“thank god,” you whispered and he nodded.
“thank god. now kiss me, Angel,” he whispered in a mock sultry tone, and you rolled your eyes at the smirk on his lips, before sealing them with your own, loving the way his hands traced over your wet skin.
one stopped to clutch at that spot over your heart, rubbing in slow, soothing circles that lulled you into a soft, distant place with Simon bound to your side.
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okay istg i don't want Konig to appear like the villain or the asshole here, he's just a bit… arrogant and insensitive but socially anxious and has a good heart at the same time :( just a lot of built up complexes as a self-defense mechanism :(
also obviously we got jealous ghost here but how possessive was he? not very much. possessive ghost will probably appear later on... 🌚
edit: okay soooo idk what's going on w the tags on this post they are like breaking my posts???? bc i can't edit the posts with tags on the post and IDK WHAT'S GOING ON BUT if i accidentally tagged you multiple times i am sorry... tumblr is making my life a little bit harder rn 😵‍💫
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junicult · 1 year
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!! the bachelors & hot features they have / things they do
contains ; gn!farmer. written w fem!farmer in mind, but nothing that specifies. established relationship. nsfw. body / facial hair headcanons. suggestive content. mostly sfw w fluff. not proofread.
note ; ok so this is a prompt i made like a year ago on my other blog, so i just decided to bring it here w stardew valley characters!
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harvey.
- he’s literally the loml.
- he’s so well groomed, his hygiene is genuinely perfect.
- ofc we know he has his famous mustache, super clean and neat. he trims it every so often to keep it that way.
- and i feel like he can grow a beard, but it doesn’t come in as thick so he decides to just shave it.
- this man has a happy trail 🫡
- a dark, thick patch of hair that trails up to his belly button. it progressively thins the higher it goes, but it’s definitely prominent when he’s wearing low shorts or even just boxers.
- he keeps that nice and trimmed too. i’m tellin you, he’s so clean.
- he also smells so good. whether it be cologne, or just him, it’s so good.
- he’s a boxer briefs kinda guy. they make him feel secure.
- he probably sleeps in a matching pair of pants and shirt. lol.
- but likely during the summer, he’ll end up falling asleep in just his boxers every once in a while.
- this man is the perfect husband.
- wakes up to make you breakfast, makes dinner to give you before you get home.
- on lazy days he’ll clean up the house, make sure it’s all nice and tidy while you work on the farm.
- he recognizes you have a lot to do, so he wants to give you as much as you give him.
- a househusband, if u will.
- he’s a cuddler.
- whether it be just sitting on the couch, watching tv, or lying in bed—he’s cuddling u.
- big spoon, little spoon, wrapped around your body one way or another.
- if he knows you hate cuddling, he’ll be cool about it. but you’ll probably have to compromise and give him something, like his hand holding yours or your head resting against his chest.
- your presence is enough, he just likes to feel you’re there before falling asleep.
- he’s huge on emotional intimacy.
- after a long day, and he gets to just unwind with you, and maybe a glass of wine every once in a while is like heaven to him.
- the type to set up a nice bubble bath with candles and stuff, just so you two can sit and catch up.
- “hm? no, my day was fine. much better now.”
- i’m just saying, harvey, with his hair slightly damp, glasses low on the bridge of his nose, head tilted to the side while listening to you intently, and his body all covered in bubbles. he’s so…
- fuck i love him.
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sam.
- a thinner happy trail, but still goes up to his belly button.
- it’s like a slightly darker patch of blonde hair.
- he doesn’t really have to groom it or anything, but he does make sure it’s fairly neat every once in a while.
- he honestly doesn’t really dwell on it though. it’s just there, and since you’ve expressed interest in it, he’s more then happy to leave it.
- i feel like he could grow facial hair, but it always comes in super patchy and thin, so he just shaves it off.
- he honestly prefers it that way too. it just doesn’t look good on him.
- boxer shorts 🤭🤭🤭
- those baggy, plaid shorts that look so fucking good, especially when he wears them low on his waist.
- that’s all he wears to bed lol.
- CUDDLER!!!!!!
- spooning with him is so cute, swear.
- probably bc he wants to strictly be little spoon.
- even if you’re significantly shorter then him, he loves feeling like you’re his little backpack.
- i almost wanna say he moves around a lot in his sleep. it’s really interesting to wake up and see where he’s laying.
- like, he can go to bed with his whole body tucked under the covers, head on the pillow and feet at the end—but he’ll wake up with his limbs hanging off the end and entirely upside down above the covers.
- all of that but somehow he knows not to touch you, so it’s like a little surprise every time you both wake up.
- he absolutely loves pda.
- not an inappropriate amount, but there’s no way he can go even an hour without kissing you somehow when you’re together.
- holding your hand when you’re standing together, leaning over to give you a kiss on the cheek just cus.
- he loves going 1 on 1 with you during pool, but mainly because he just loves how sassy you get when you’re winning.
- or, whenever he’s playing against sebastian and he has you by his side cheering him on.
- he feels on top of the world.
- he’s so in love with you, swear.
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shane.
- 😵‍💫
- he’s got what i’d like to say is a dad bod.
- round tummy, large arms, broad shoulders. he’s attractive in a realistic sense, and he may not be incredibly confident, but your attraction to his physique makes him a lot more self assured.
- especially when your eyes wander a little when he takes off his shirt, and he can mask his flattery with a teasing comment.
- “wanna take a picture?” so smugly, just so he can see your lips purse and you immediately look away.
- *sweats* h-happy trail….
- it’s thick; and dark, and not necessarily groomed, it just kinda grows one way & he doesn’t really touch it.
- literally 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨
- not to mention he also definitely has chest hair, but not enough that it’s disgusting, y’know?
- and he has facial hair.
- just subtle scruff all around his chin and jaw, mainly because he couldn’t care enough to shave but also bc he knows you like it.
- that’s about all he can grow, anyways.
- it’s extremely (and i mean EXTREMELY) rare he’d shave, but on the occasion he does…
- tease him about it.
- loves when you rub your fingers against his cheeks, especially when you’re sitting in his lap just like, “it’s so soft, you look prepubescent.”
- he doesn’t, not in the slightest, but it’s still funny to see him swat your hand away and his face gets all red.
- after u got married and he got better with his addiction, i’d like to think he became much help on the farm.
- you need trees chopped? he’s ur guy.
- clean the chicken coop? obviously.
- maybe even sometimes if you’re not feeling good, you can bet he does everything you need for you.
- so his body definitely builds from that, but don’t fear! he’s still got his chub.🫡
- he sleeps in boxer shorts also.
- that or some pants, but never a shirt.
- if he’s wearing a shirt in bed, something’s seriously wrong with him. that, or it’s like the dead of winter (but even then it’s so rare.)
- this dude is like a FURNACE at night. he’s literally radiating heat just by laying there.
- and he’s not an initial cuddler.
- he loves you, but he likes his space getting ready to fall asleep.
- but i can promise you, somehow during the night he’ll end up wrapped around you entirely, squeezing u and practically lighting you on fire w his body heat.
- it’s endearing, tho.
- no matter how much he says he hates cuddling, he still ends up like that somehow (so who’s to say he really hates it?)
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sebastian.
- 🤭🤭🤭
- lean build, pretty skinny.
- super pale too, and i’d like to think he has a ton of random freckles spotting across his body.
- not very many on his face cus he doesn’t get much sun (lol) but yeah, little moles here and there.
- his skin is also super smooth all the time for some reason.
- he’s not weak by any means, lowkey sleeper build except nothing really comes out when he uses his muscles LMFAO.
- like, if you give him a bunch of logs to carry that are really heavy, you expect him to only grab a few, not the whole bunch.
- and he can carry it effortlessly. it’s easy to forget he’s genuinely strong.
- but anyways, he doesn’t have chest hair or a happy trail.
- no facial hair, either. literally none. he’s just never been able to grow it, and he’s actually totally fine with that lol.
- his pubic hair is so well groomed, and that isn’t even by cause. his hair just naturally looks like that.
- a small dark patch around his shaft, fairly short but still just utterly average.
- if he whipped his dick out, you wouldn’t be shocked or anything.
- he strictly wears pj pants to bed, no shirt.
- he has veryyy subtle definition in his abs, so subtle you’d have to squint to see it.
- and he’s the kind of guy that (if he wanted to) no matter how hard he tried to get bulkier, it just wouldn’t work.
- he’s just genetically a pretty lanky guy, and while growing up he was embarrassed by it, right now he couldn’t care less.
- he’s grown to be more confident in himself after being with you.
- this man loves being praised, and when you reassure him he’s the ideal man for you.
- “you look so handsome today. did you do something with your hair?” hearing that first thing in the morning, when he didn’t even do anything & he actually doesn’t feel super attractive at the moment: yeah he’ll be thinking about that for weeks.
- it makes him feel so good whenever you randomly shoot one-liners that’ll catch him off guard like that.
- like in passing during a busy day, you’re just coming up to check on him for a couple minutes and you wrap your arms around his shoulders, giving him a kiss on the cheek.
- “you make it so hard for me to stay on task all day.” you sigh, grinning when he clearly gets all flustered.
- and he may not be as bold as you, but he has his moments.
- “mm, what if you just stayed in bed with me today?” “wish you’d stop pulling away whenever you feel gross, y’know it doesn’t bother me.” 👀👀
- this probably doesn’t need to be said, but i’m gonna say it anyways,
- he doesn’t like pda. the most he’ll do is hold your hand if you’re in public together, maybe kiss you on the cheek if he’s feels particularly affectionate / protective every now and then.
- he likes to keep his relationship private, it makes you feel a little more special to him.
- like, he loves the fact that only he gets to see you in specific ways.
- such as just being together on sappy evenings, softly mumbling things you love about each other while being in his arms. things like that.
- cus for him, if he does stuff like that in public, well for starters he’ll get uncomfortable. he’s too introverted for stuff like that.
- but really, it just means anyone can look over and see what you both look like when you’re all vulnerable with eachother, and to him he’d much rather keep that private.
- now, that being said…this man is so clingy lol.
- if you both are having an indoor day, and he’s working on the computer, while you’re just sorting through stuff inside, he’ll want to be near you.
- you’re at the stove? he’s at the kitchen table.
- you’re in the living room? he’s on the couch.
- you’re brushing your teeth? so is he.
- it can be dead silent between you two, just as long as you’re nearby, he’s happy.
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alex.
- he’s one of the guys with a more toned physique.
- he’s got some pretty nice arms, can i just say.
- they’re toned, grow larger when he flexes, even resting they look pretty nice.
- and his abs too, they’re not crazy, but they’re definitely there.
- a nice definition you can see even when he’s not flexing. there’s at least four there.
- as for facial hair, he has none.
- i feel like if he could grow some, he’d definitely leave it. it’d make him feel more “manly.”
- but he just doesn’t LMFAO.
- now, non-facial hair is a different story👀
- he’s got a happy trail folks!!!
- it’s a dark, thick patch of brown hair that trails (once again) all the way up to his belly button.
- and it’s so fucking hot.
- it might be the prettiest (next to harvey’s, ofc.)
- believe it or not, he’s actually pretty neat with it.
- he takes pride in being attractive! ofc he’s going to groom it.
- trims it whenever it gets untamed, but never shaves it off. he loves it, and he knows you do too.
- he’s also a boxer briefs guy. 99% of the time, he’s walking around wearing only his boxer briefs in the house.
- especially whenever it’s an indoor day, yeah, he’s not even bothering getting dressed at all😭😭
- that’s all he sleeps in. even if it’s the middle of winter.
- another pda fan.
- but this time, dare i say…he’s a little more bold.
- he’ll kiss you like he does when you’re private, even if there’s people around.
- cupping your cheek, pulling you in for likely more then 5 seconds sometimes.
- he’ll hold onto your waist when you’re standing together. he’ll stand behind you with his arms wrapped around you, even.
- and well, yes there’s empty seats all around you, but that’s too bad. cus he’s pulling you into sitting in his lap.
- he loves knowing everyone’s jealous of him.
- you’re so attractive, he knows all the other men look at you thinking the same thing.
- and he just loves how he’s got a rock on your finger that’s similar to his. he loves the fact that you said yes to him, not to anyone else who would’ve asked.
- so he loves showing you off.
- he’s got such a high libido, so he’s fairly sexual all the time.
- rolling over to kiss you after fucking you for literal hours, and even just the sight of you lying there, trying to catch your breath has him ready to go again.
- he’s one to grope you (consensually!)
- like, if ur walking by him, he’ll grab your ass and shoot you a grin like nothing even happened.
- but he knows when to be more serious, like if you had bad day and you just need a good cry.
- i’d like to think he’s really good at comforting people.
- he was there for his mom whenever his dad was treating them horribly, and he definitely helped her through a few tears, so he’s perfect at just holding you.
- he’s genuinely a sweetheart. yes he’s cocky, and flirty, but when it comes to people he loves: he’s so perfect.
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elliot.
- *cracks knuckles*
- he can grow facial hair, but he normally goes without it.
- it comes in thick, but it won’t grow past any stubble (or at least he doesn’t let it before shaving it all off.)
- but omfg…his facial hair looks so nice when he lets it grow for a bit.
- especially when he kisses you, or lets you cup your hands around his jaw during that phase.
- he’s another one that loves to feel your fingers rake through his hair when you’re just commenting on how handsome he looks with it.
- despite how attractive it is, he still prefers it gone. so it’s rare when he lets it get to that point.
- his has a very subtle happy trail. it’s mostly just a patch of hair that peeks above his waistline, and it doesn’t go all the way up to his belly button,
- but it’s still as handsome as ever.
- his sleepwear is literally silk. stg.
- he’s so extra.
- he probably even got you a matching pair with your initials engraved “just cus.”
- but when he isn’t wearing all of that, he’s probably just wearing some regular pj pants and a shirt.
- it’s rare tho, cus like i said—he’s so extra.
- something so casual, but so attractive that he does is when he’s super exhausted with writing for so long, that he just leans back in his chair and sighs.
- like…he throws his arms over his head, manspreads just a little and sighs.
- or or or
- after you’ve had such a long and exhausting day, he’s quick to place his pencil down and open his arms to slot you on his lap.
- “tell me what’s the matter, my love. want me to make you some tea, get you some water?”
- and while you’re talking, he’s just gently rubbing your thigh and kissing your arms softly.
- he’s just so gracious and endearing.
- this man 😮‍💨😮‍💨
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2K notes · View notes
riiwrites · 8 months
Text
bsd boys love language
authors note : hi guys i’m back, I’ve had no motiviation what so ever so please have this as an apology </3 ( =ω= )
includes : atsushi, dazai, chuuya, ranpo, kunikida
genre : fluff
warnings : none
wc : 1378
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Atsushi Nakajima
Physical Touch & Words of Affirmations
At first he’s not too keen on the whole physical touch concept. I mean he would gladly hold your hand and give you cheek kisses, the little things. But I don’t think he’d be so willing at first due to how he’s not quite used to being touched in such an affectionate way.
He finds it hard to warm up to that kind of stuff so easily. But once he takes that risk and opens up to you then oh boy, he’s hooked.
He’s so in love with holding your hand tightly wherever you guys go, your fingers interlocked with one another ever so tightly.
He’s a sucker for giving you little kisses on your face and hands too, cheeks, lips forehead, nose you name it.
If he ever just needed a break from the world and just from everything, he would go to you instantly, placing his hands on your hips and burrowing his head into your neck, resting it there and basking the scent of your hair and his problems all fade away into thin air.
Bottom line, he’s absolutely whipped for your touch <3
Atsushi melts at him receiving compliments and praise. He gets all flustered as he’s always trying his best and he’s really happy to know that you take notice of him trying to be the best he can be for you and everyone else.
Atsushi also absolutely worships you in the cutest ways possibly. He absolutely adores you and is determined to make it clear.
He’s quick to give you the sweetest compliments ever.
"oh love, you look so beautiful today."
"i love your outfit today, you look stunning"
"you look so precious today, sweetheart!"
He always gives you these compliments because he always wants you to know you’re enough. You’re absolutely perfect to him and he feels so lucky that you’re in his life and he doesn’t understand how and what he did to deserve it but he cherishes you ever so close to him and his heart.
Always complimenting you and always loving you dearly <3
Dazai Osamu
Physical Touch
Dazai is a very touchy man. He is practically all over you all the time.
He’s not clingy per say, but he’s just very touchy and wants to constantly be caressing you in some kind of way. he’s clingy.
When it’s in public, he’s not too clingy as he doesn’t want the attention to be all on you two whilst you’re out and about, you’re for him only nobody else deserves to know and see you two in such affectionate ways.
But he does do little signs of PDA and affection in public.
Yknow the thing in romance movies when the guy puts his hand in the others back jean pocket (please tell me someone knows what i mean)
Yeah, he does that.
When you’re home alone though, prepare for not being left alone because he’s jumping you. (with love of course!)
He loves cuddling you, being the big spoon in bed and stuff. Although he is the little spoon when he’s at his most softest with you :)
Dazai also loves giving you little kisses all over your precious little face. He just loves grabbing your cute cheeks in his rough hands and starts puckering his lips all over your face as you scrunch up your nose and giggle at his antics.
If you work with him at the agency, he tries his best to distract you by coming up from behind you and snaking his arms around your waist and pulling you in, hugging you and basically smothering you until you give up with your assigned cases.
He feels proud when you give in and Kunikida ends up scolding him for it.
Chuuya Nakahara
Gift Giving & Quality Time
Chuuya treats you like royalty. He thinks you’re the most graceful thing to have ever stepped foot onto this planet, so he thinks if you are royalty you should be treated as such.
With his pay, he treats with the most exquisite gifts ever, he loves to spoil you. He just adores seeing your eyes light up in admiration and your cheeks puff up as the corners of your lips perk up into a bright and heart filled smile.
He’ll buy you the most pricey shoes and/or heels to ever exist, along with a whole brand new dress/suit for you to wear on your next date.
On specific holidays, such as your birthday or Valentine’s Day he is on an absolute spending rampage to get everything you could possibly imagine. He makes sure to have everything planned out for both of your guys’ special day.
Whenever he couldn’t be home for dinners or even just in general when he couldn’t show up, he would buy you a special little gift as an apology for him not being able to show up.
"I’m sorry I couldn’t show, doll. you said ya liked that necklace yeah? it’s all yours." <3
Chuuya loves spending quality time just by walking through the streets of Yokohama with you holding his arm ever so gently, browsing through the shops and enjoying the fresh air as you rest your cheek against your lovers shoulder, so in love with him as he’s so in love with you <33
Chuuya also adores just basking in the sweet silence with you, you sitting between his legs as he rests his head on the top of yours, playing with your hair and closing his pretty eyes.
Nothing but beautiful sweet silence with you. <3
Ranpo Edogawa
Physical Touch & Gift Giving
Ranpo, other than candy, craves your touch. He’s so whipped for just hugging you and having your arms around him or vice versa. He loves a little lazy day with you when you’re either in his arms or he’s in your yours and you’re both just relaxing and enjoying eachothers company.
You both are always in some sort of cuddling position. Wherever it’s you behind him or him behind you, you’re both cuddling somewhere and someplace.
He’s also 100% the little spoon of the relationship too, I don’t make the rules. He just loves being in your arms in general and enjoys being close to you when you’re both sleeping.
Like I said previously, he enjoys lazy days with you. A lazy day with Ranpo consists of you two, pajamas on all day, a cozy bed, lots of snacks and sweets is a must along with a big screen TV as you both watch thrillers and murder mysteries together.
Unfortunately for you though, Ranpo already knows the killer the moment the movie starts so he’s alright right and spoils the ending for you when he’s feeling cheeky.
Kunikida Doppo
Acts of Service
Kunikida is a very active man. Always on his feet, doing basically everything he can for his work place and for his lovely partner.
When he does stuff for you, he’s willing to do it, no questions asked. It doesn’t feel like a chore when he’s doing it for you.
He’ll water the plants in your apartment, cook for you, clean for you.
You ask him if he needs any help? No, he’s okay thanks for the offer though. He always insists on having you relax and take a break for yourself even though the poor man doesn’t take breaks for himself.
I firmly believe he has a set on schedule where he has a whole day planned out where he just does all the work that needs to be done for you and just lets you have a nice day off.
He loves seeing your precious soft smile as you kiss his cheek and thank him so much for all he’s done for you, he practically melts into your touch but he quickly composes it with those stern eyes but a soft smile to capture that sweetness.
He takes note of things that you personally like doing or things you actually don’t particularly like doing and instead he does those things for you.
He takes in the little details of you and pays attention to your likes and dislikes and makes sure that he can fufill your own ideals and happiness because you deserve to be happy too <3
389 notes · View notes
sc0tters · 2 months
Text
Goodbye Too Soon | Luke Hughes
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summary: the rise and fall of love was always meant to hurt but maybe with Luke it wasn’t your end?
request: yes/no
warnings: semi-angst, swearing, underaged drinking.
word count: 2.48k
authors note: just like that I’ve written for Luke again and now Angst Week is finished! I’ve realised too that Luke is one man I can’t write angst for because this was so hard. I left the end more open because it started to sound like a decent series so let me know if you want it!
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Love was something you never quite understood.
You knew that you were bound to feel it eventually, yet you never thought that it would be this soon. Luke came into your life in your freshman year during orientation weekend.
The atmosphere was strong as the seniors were convincing certain freshmen to join the drinking competitions “shit!” Your white shirt was quickly turning brown as the wet fabric revealed your blue bra beneath it “oh my god.” Luke brought his hand to his mouth as he dropped the empty cup.
Embarrassment flooded the boys mind as his eyes widened “I’m so sorry.” He blurted out having a loss for words as he truthfully had no clue what to do “it’s fine.” Your teeth gritted as you felt your skin grow sticky by what you could only assume has something to do with the coke in his drink.
Luke’s panic only increased when he realised how your bra was playing a losing game of hide’n’seek “here.” Luke was quick to take the flannel off of his shoulders as he held it out for you to grab “I’m good.” You shook your head sighing as you wondered how you were going to clean your shirt.
It only made the boy feel worse “please.” He pleaded with you clearly not prepared to leave with you having your bra on display “okay.” You nodded sending him a soft smile as you took the piece of clothing from him.
The flannel encapsulated you in this warmth as you were practically drowned in fabric “now could I get you a new drink?” A toothy grin covered your face as you giggled “I don’t even know your name.” You pointed out as you buttoned up portions of the flannel to cover your shirt.
That part was true as you hadn’t met him yet, even if Luke spent the entire week watching you from afar “Luke Hughes.” He held his hand out for you to shake “y/n l/n.” You explained as you sent him a smile that he’d remember for the rest of his life, regardless of if you were ever going to be more than an acquaintance.
It seemed that from that night on you guys were only ever met to grow closer as before you knew it you were going to hockey games wearing Luke’s jersey like it was a badge of honor with his name proudly displayed on your back. Love came at you in ways you didn’t expect like with the shadows of the night. And before you knew it you had fallen for Luke, both literally and in love.
It was cold as Luke had somehow convinced you to join the team and their families for the weekend where the family skate took place “I got you okay?” Luke smiled as he watched your hands tense around his “remind me to kill you when we get home.” Your grumble caused a laugh to escape his lips.
You scoffed as he continued to skate backwards “this should have been something you knew was going to happen when I became your best friend.” It was now your turn to laugh “whose say you’re my best friend?” You shot back leaving his lips pursed into a thin line.
He didn’t need to respond as he dropped your hands giving you a push to continue skating “Luke!” You squealed shaking your head as you grew unimpressed “you wanted to tell me I’m your best friend now?” His request made you laugh.
A smile formed on his lips at the sound “alright you big goof you’re my best friend!” With that his hand wrapped around your waist pulling you in close as he helped you steady yourself on the ice “now that wasn’t so hard was it?” Luke mumbled sending you a grin as you rolled your eyes.
He stopped freezing as he looked at you staring down between your eyes and your lips “you’re a little shit.” You laughed as you shook your head ignoring how he made you feel.
You began to fall in love with Luke and for each week you tried to deny it you were only falling deeper in love with the curly haired boy. You knew that you could try and act like he was just a friend. But that only got you so far when you’d watch him get close to other girls leaving you tight lipped.
Luke let his hands wrap around your waist as he pulled you into his lap “you wanna tell me what’s wrong?” He mumbled pressing a kiss on your shoulder as you had been quiet all night “you make me so mad.” You confessed furrowing your brows as you swore you wouldn’t let your emotions get the best of you.
He frowned letting concern wash over his face “you flirt with all of these girls and it’s just-” a sigh escaped from your lips as he smirked “you just want my attention huh?” Luke teased running his thumb over your lips as you nodded hating how he made you feel so open.
The boy wasn’t one for leaving you in your embarrassment for long “good thing I want all your attention then too.” He smiled leaning forward as his hand moved to your chin “god you’re going to kill me.” You gasped as his lips finally hit yours.
It seemed that within seconds his hands went to your ass as yours wrapped around his shoulders. You moaned at the feeling of his cock forming a tent in his shorts. The hockey player was in awe as the sweet taste of your lipgloss had him feeing drunk, even with one drink in his system.
Neither one of you knew how long you had been there for as his lips began to nip your jaw “oi love birds are you going to play beer pong or not?” Marks words made you pull away from Luke as you sighed “this isn’t over Hughesy.” You mumbled running your nails over his shoulder as his hand rested on your thigh.
As you got up the boy nodded “better not.” His hand locked in with yours letting you pull him into the crowd.
It was that night that he had asked you out and quickly you began the perfect relationship that everyone grew jealous of. If only someone had a crystal ball to predict the future. Maybe then you would have valued the smaller moments more.
Your laughter echoed through the house as Luke smothered you with soft pecks “god I can’t believe I left you.” He announced to himself leaving his friends to roll their eyes “you left her for one night.” Mark reminded the boy causing you both to look at him.
Whilst Luke sent him a glare you couldn’t help but run your fingers through Luke’s hair “don’t be mad that Lukey here missed me.” You announced making the boy furrow his eyebrows “I think it’s sweet.” Your words made Luke smile as he turned to face you.
All you had to do was nod to make the boy finally kiss you properly leaving you with an even larger grin on your face with Luke scooped your into his arms opting to get rid of the audience and take you up to his room “don’t make us uncles!” The boys called out before the door shut.
Yet as the saying goes, all things that come up must come down. Yet you never thought that you’d crash and burn in the ways that you did. It was the morning of the boys frozen four game in Florida when you got the text.
Luke 💗: this isn’t working out anymore, I’m moving to the Devils and think we should go our own ways.
You responded to his message like any normal person would who had just been dumped over text. Luke wasn’t surprised to see the flurry of messages that came in all from you but he knew that if he came to you he would still be with you. And in the fucked up world that his brothers spoke so highly of, loving you from afar was meant to be easy. Leaving you like that was also meant to be easer for you to move on if you thought he was an ass.
Junior year at UMich felt like a foreign drink that you hated on your tongue. Luke was a shadow everywhere you looked and it had you thinking their was a bad smell you couldn’t get rid of. Your friends tried all that they could to help you move on yet there was only so much they could do if you weren’t going to listen.
To say that you were a fraction of yourself was an understatement. You found yourself sat in your dorm most nights as you felt sorry for yourself staring at the old memories in the form of photos and old hoodies, you could never bear to get rid of.
Yet all of that changed on your birthday, it was the one day you were forced to share with Luke as your birthday fell on the same date. Your friends and his old teammates believed alike that you needed a day to let loose. That’s how you all landed up at a bar where your handful of legally aged friends were on duty buying drinks for the group.
At first it was fun and you enjoyed it, feeling the reminders of why you loved seeing your friends having fun with you. But as the DJ changed the song opting for one from ABBA. It had you feeling like a bubble was burst over your head and you were drenched in the reminder of those memories.
It was cold in Michigan as Luke was preparing to leave you for the winter break “stop for a sec.” He muttered to himself as you had been packing gifts for his parents into his bag “I need to finish this.” You pointed out clicking your tongue as his hands found their place on your hips.
He smiled as you dropped the box on his clothes “you’re such a gorgeous girl.” Luke confessed as your hands found their place on his shoulders “not so bad yourself.” You giggled pressing a kiss against his cheek shutting the gap between you both.
The soft hums of the song echoed in your ears “digging the dancing queen!” The hockey player sang as he swayed your hips back and forth “you’re a teaser you turn ‘em on.” You laughed when he spun you around leaving your back against his chest as he left his head nuzzled against your shoulder.
You guys stayed there for a few moments “I’m so in love with you.” His confession made your cheeks feel warm “don’t think those were the lyrics.” You teased turning back to face him.
As the boy panicked not knowing how to respond you smiled “I love you too.” Your lips were soft on his leaving you wanting to stay there forever.
You felt as though bile was building up in your throat when you forced you way out of the bar. Passers by were waved off as you placed your hands on your knees attempting to do everything in your power to stop yourself from falling forward. Your head tilted upwards in an attempt to force more air into your lungs as you opened up your phone go it into your contacts.
It took little to no effort to find his contact as you shifted into muscle memory not caring for this one moment of lapsed judgement “hey it’s Luke, I can’t get to the phone right now so if it’s important call Quinn or I’ll get back to you!” His voicemail made you smile as you remembered learning how irritated Jack got by the mention of his older brother “god I’m meant to hate you.” You began as you clicked your tongue.
The air around you grew colder “but no I still like you and I sure as hell fucking love you.”
Tears began to roll down your cheeks as just on cue rain began to drop from the sky “why couldn’t you have cheated on me or something so I could move on!” You grew angry as you clenched your hand around your phone.
There was a subtle reminder that the message was going to stop recording soon “I don’t know why I sent you this because you haven’t even listens to the last ones.” A huff left your lips as the line went dead leaving you to run your fingers through your hair as you felt defeated.
The rain brought this level of calm that you hadn’t felt in a while letting it wrap you up in a blanket as you were growing unsure of what was tears and what was rainwater “there you are birthday girl, c’mon!” Rutger cheered as he found where you were stood.
All the way in New Jersey stood a similar scene. Luke wasn’t interested in celebrating his birthday, not without you by his side. Yet he still ended up drunk and curled into his blanket as Jack tucked him in “I miss her.” Luke confessed letting out a sob as the build a bear you got him sat in his arms.
Jack frowned slipping his brother’s phone into his pocket “I know you do bud but she isn’t calling and you need to focus on your hockey.” Jack sighed getting up before the turned the light off seeing that Luke was already asleep.
The notification of your voicemail stood in front of him like a calling to stop trying to meddle in his brother’s life “I do this for him.” Jack reminded himself as he deleted the voicemail not bothering to check it.
Sure someone might wonder what Jack was doing in that moment, truthfully he was beginning to ask himself that too. But after his own horrible rookie season Jack knew the last thing Luke needed was to be waiting for a girl that wasn’t even in his state.
College romances were meant to only last a few months or a year tops. It was why Jack didn’t feel guilty about lying to Luke about how you sent at least one voicemail each month. in trying to protect his baby brother through righting his own previous wrongs Jack lost sight of the most important thing, Luke.
Some might say that luck was on Luke’s side though, or maybe it was the divine act of fate that could withhold a brother’s stupidity. Because this wasn’t the end of your story with Luke. No instead this was the beginning of it, and your reunion was set at Little Caesars Arena. So the true question was were you both willing to get there or were you going to find new people as stops along the way back to where you belonged?
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lovelybunn · 10 months
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some hugs n cuddles !ㅤ- feat. howdy, barnaby and eddie
warning(s): none.
author's note: y'know i just HAD to feed on the delusional fantasy by writing for the big boy trio... (also this is lowkey established relationship)
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🐛  howdy pillar .
Howdy whistles contently to himself while organizing the shelves of his store. His work is cut short by the familiar jingle of the bell at the entrance, alerting him of your presence.  “Howdy, neighbor, welcome to my bodega! Anything you need, I got it for ya. How can I be of service?” Howdy greets you with a warm smile as you step inside.
You walk up to the front counter and clear your throat. “I know this is not what you're currently selling, but…” Howdy's big, buggy eyes twinkled, “What is it? I can get it in stock in a jiffy, if you'd like!” You awkwardly press your lips into a thin line and exclaim, “It's not a product.” 
“Oh?” He pauses. “Then what is it?” He asks slowly, the gentle baritone of his voice flowing through your eardrums. His eyebrows furrow and antennae shuffle with worry. You snicker and wave your hand dismissively, “Hey, don't give me that look! I wanted a hug!”
The frown on his fluffy face soon molded into a bright smile. "Oh, then why didn't ya just say that, lovebug?" He rushes over from behind the counter and swoops you off your feet. Howdy's lower pair of arms kept you up as he wraps his upper pair around your waist. He gently squeezes you close. "You're the cutest, (Name)!" The two of you giggle, giving sweet butterfly kisses against each other's noses.
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤheadcanons !
getting cuddles/hugs from this man is absolute heaven for ppl that are chronically touch starved (like me—)
howdy's two pairs of arms will give all the affection anyone would need in their entire life. like boy will have two arms wrapped around your waist, one hand caressing your cheek, and the last one intertwined with your fingers <333
he doesn't wanna bend over, so he'll pick u up alot tho… (he's old and carries boxes all the time, his back don't need all that, alr?)
he's very soft. he has fur/fluff. (yes, i am basing that off of clownsuu's design, and what?)
and i feel like he would just love holding you anyway. ur just so small compared to him and he wants to protect you, y'know?
i personally see howdy being the papa of the neighborhood, taking care of everyone alongside poppy (but he's a lil bit more strict than she is about it lmao)
hear me out on this one guys…. i know that most ppl portray him as this chatterbox, but he knows how and when to listen. 
howdy will make sure that u never feel unheard or unloved, the sweet boy will make it his mission to put a smile on that adorable face of urs
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🌭 barnaby b beagle .
Barnaby slouches in the bench chair and sighs. He takes a bite out of his hotdog when his eyes trail to a familiar face, walking up to him. "Ah, ey, kiddo. Whatchu want?" He gives you a relaxed smile. "I wanted to ask you for something."
He tilts his head, eyebrow raised. "Hmm? Go on, I got time." You take in a deep breath, "Hey Barnaby, Can you…" You pause as he leans closer to you. "Can you hold me? I've had kinda a rough day, and you're my go-to." He takes the last bite of his hotdog and pats his lap. " 'Course, kid. You can stay as long as you like."
Just as soon as you get his permission, you're sitting with your back towards him, his big paws placed gently across your belly. His plump figure makes it easy for you to practically sink into him like a fresh new couch. He hums a contented tune near your ear; your face warms up into a joyful grin.
Barnaby glances at you, "Ey, kiddo." You hum in response. "Y'know, I think Sally got a little bit of some competition; your smile alone could light up this whole neighborhood." You roll your eyes, a slight snicker escaping from your lips. "You're just saying that to make me feel better." He held you closer, shaking his head. Barnaby's large thumb caresses the palm of your right hand, tracing circles around its surface. "Nah, hon. It's all truth. I mean, ya must be some kinda treat, cuz I always catch myself gawking at the sight of you."
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤheadcanons !
boy's soft and plump like a giant life size pillow fr <3333 (human or dog ver, idc)
for dog ver, he loves being scratched behind his big ol ears !!!
gives bear hugs unintentionally
does that circle thing with ur palm
the dog be cooking tho. no, fr, he is the best cook in the neighborhood (and his love language is literally food) so if u need some support, he'll whip it up and serve it to u on a silver platter !!
also puns for days.. he wants to make everyone smile and laugh, u included. barnaby cannot stand a frown on a fellow neighbor's face.
Uncle-That-Smokes-Weedcore ™
he gives the best advice (when he wants to, that is. sometimes he'll say something stupid to see if whoever he gave the advice to will actually do it ;D) why do u think wally tells the man everything?
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💌 eddie dear .
Eddie quickly walks to the door of his post office, filled with gratitude for another great hard day's work. As soon as he walks through the door, you rush over to give him a tender embrace. He chuckles, “Hey there, darlin'! Did my babydoll miss me?” With your face buried in his chest, you muffle out a "Mhm." Eddie's face beams, patting your back. "Well, I missed you too, honey." He places three soft kisses on you, one on your forehead, and the other two on either cheek.
Eddie tries to move forward, but you don't budge. Your arms are glued tight to him. "Uh, darlin'...? I– I gotta get unready, y'know? Please let go of me." He chuckles nervously. He tries to sneakily pull your arms away, but you speak before he's given the chance. "You've been gone all day, dear. Can't I hug you a little while longer?" You look up at him. The pleading look in your eyes melts the poor mailman's heart within seconds. "Alright, alright, fine! But just for a few minutes. I'd like to change into less sweaty clothes at some point."
The two of you just relax there for a moment, limbs wrapped delicately around each other. Absent-mindedly, Eddie guides you into somewhat of a slow dance, and your bodies sway back and forth as you and Eddie sink deeper into one and other's touch. After about a minute, he kisses your forehead again, then pulls away. "You satisfied, love?" You smile and nod slowly, "Yes, very."
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤheadcanons !
smooches for dayssss
most days this golden retriever man will lift u up, spin u around and DROWN U in kisses, but (obv) on busier days, hes a lot more relaxed about it
his love language is words of affirmation (so lots of pet names if u couldn't tell)
hand-holding at all times (when given opportunity)
EDDIE DEAR IS A POET. BOY WRITES U LOVE LETTERS EVERY OTHER DAY, ALL OF WHICH IS HANDMADE, ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE ENVELOPE.
is it weird that i see eddie and frank as my gay parents? (yeah we ARE the two gay married men w/ their autistic child trope.)
eddie would be that crazy country dad who would with zero hesitation pull a gun on someone hurting his baby
but fr, if u were feeling sad boy would pull out the arts and crafts and go bonkers with it. like "awh, yer sad??? let's make origami butterflies to make u feel better c:"
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reivrze · 11 months
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ENHA HYUNG LINE + DATE NIGHTS
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𓆩 ♡ 𓆪 — bf!enha ( hyung ling ) x gn!reader ˚ʚ ♡ ɞ˚ — a/n : haven't done a reactions that wasn't requested for a while but here you go :) i didn't proof read this.. 𓆩 ♡ 𓆪 — word count : 0.6k
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heeseung :: hee would love to invite you over for a romantic dinner together but in the comfort of his own home. he found it so much more intimate and he loved the added bonus that he wouldnt have to share the privilege of seeing you with anyone else. only he got to see you under the dimly lit room by candles, rose petals surrounding you, and the tasteful aroma of a freshly cooked meal ( — by jay. heeseung didn’t know how to cook really good meals so he called his trusted friend to help him out ) floating in the air. It was during these slow, calm and intimate moments that heeseung realized how beautiful you were, how comfortable he felt with you and how safe it all made him feel. The night would most likely end with a deep and passionate kiss, hands roaming each others side, both trying to bring the other closer, as close as possible.
jongseong :: jay would be a dinner man too but he’d prefer to take you out to eat at a nice, luxurious restaurant. as a gentleman, he’d pick you up on time, walk up to your door and escort you to his car. he’d spend the whole night with at least one of his hands on you, wether it was laced with yours, settled on your waist or laid on your thighs when you were seated, his hands never left you. he’s the definition of romantic and rich so expect roses, a vip room, and he would pay for everything. he had gifted you with a brand new thin silver necklace which he helped put on, brushing your hair to the side, he struggled for a bit but as soon as he had the necklace locked, he laid a light feathery kiss on your neck, a kiss that would send chills down your back.
jaeyun :: jake would spend date nights with you out in the town, he loved to go festivals or attractions park when the sun came down. he’d have his fingers laced with yours all night and tuck his face in the crook of your neck in an attempt to warm up his beautiful features from the chilly night wind. You would go to the little lego shop, then those arcade like stands where you would both win each other plushies, you had bought him a small white cat plushie and he had won you one of those big teddy bears, which he offered to hold for you as it was a little heavy. You would get something to eat in a street food stand, the contrast of the hot food to the cold air, brought tears to your eyes and a burning mouth all while jake was laughing his head off at the sight.
sunghoon :: sunghoon prefers at home date nights, spent in each others arms under the thick covers you brought from your room to the living room. You spent the whole night cuddling close, your legs over his, one of his hands on your legs and the other one laid on your back, while you laid your head in his chest. Outside he might not be the most touchy person. All that switches once he walks through the door of your home, then he loves having you as close as he can. The night would consist of you watching your favourite movies, ordering food delivery from your favourite restaurants, and sleeping. You guys fell asleep watching your fourth movie of the night in each others embrace, waking up the next morning, lots of exchanged kisses.
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© miyu 2023 - do not copy, translate, repost or plagiarise my work anywhere !
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yuna542 · 1 year
Text
Connected (OT8 x reader)
Part 5 <-
Part 6
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Pairing: Lee Know x Reader
Genre: Smut, Fluff, Angst
Warnings: 18+, under 18 DNI!, Smut, Suggestive Themes, Swearing, Fingering, Dry humping, mentions of sex, pet names
Word Count: 3k
Note: Yea… What can I say? Lee Know was my first Kpop Crush, so I really put my soul into this. So hear me out: I thought since your feedback is incredible, I wanted to give you something back. If you want to you can write suggestions/requests in the comments or dm me about what you'd like to read in the parts. If I like it I will think of something and include it in the story! So feel free to tell me your dirty (or sweet) little fantasies xD
On your first day of your new job as the personal manager of Stray Kids, you didn't expect to be standing in front of the man you made out with last night in a club. But it soon becomes clear that the Stray Kids don't just want you as their manager.
Will this passionate arrangement end your career?
"I finally want to see you dance live!", grumbled Lee Know as you emailed him his schedule for the day in the practice room.
"Maybe someday", you muttered as you skimmed over your messages.
“Stupid JYP with those stupid rules”, he sighed and you had to grin. You'd love to dance and maybe even do a livestream with Minho but the company probably wouldn't allow it. The Stream with Hyunjin was a spontaneous idea and you were sincerely happy that yet nobody from JYP had talked about it to you. You didn’t even know if they maybe had a talk with Hyunjin and you were sure, that he definitely wouldn’t tell you to protect you.
However one of the most important meetings was scheduled for this afternoon.
A meeting with a potential new sponsor and at the same time producer for the first music video of the comeback. So one of the most important meetings ever.
The first video had to work the way the guys imagined it and it was your job to make it work. It was essential that the new sponsor was on board.
To say you're nervous would be a massive understatement.
It was the first big meeting that you would have to do alone with Chan. Seungmin would also accompany you, which took some of the pressure off your shoulders. This was one thing you just couldn't mess up.
You just wanted to send Lee Know his appointments for today and skim them quick with him. The tasks consisted the meeting with a new choreographer and then discussing with DanceRacha whether their ideas for the choreography for the big video could be done as they wanted it or if they needed to work on it even more.
Hyunjin and Felix had both already written in your group chat that they were here at any moment and Jeongin was with them. As you walked into the room, Minho seemed to have been dancing all morning.
There were fine drops of sweat on his forehead and yet his skin was just glowing with freshness. Just like perfectly worked marble.
"The choreographer's name is Chun De-Jeong. His application was the most impressive and he has very good references. He sounded nice on the phone, too. But if you don't like something about him, just let me know and we'll find someone new”, you explained expertly and he smiled slightly.
"You really are the best manager we've ever had."
"I try my best", you replied, and that's when he sat down next to you on the sofa.
With that, you finished discussing his schedule as well.
"I've never seen you in a dress like that before...", he mused aloud, and right away you were tugging at the hem of the white fabric on your thigh.
"Is it too much? Do you think it would be better if I change?"
Concerned, you stroke the fine roses printed on the fabric. Directly, Lee Know shook his head, regretting his words.
"No. It's perfect. You are... It looks very cute. You look very beautiful", he said quickly, stumbling over his own words.
Actually, he couldn't take his eyes off the thin fabric the whole time, where it perfectly hugged your curves and sat firmly against your waist. Exploring your profile, Minho noticed from the moment you came in that you seemed tense and restless today.
"Hey, is everything okay?"
Quickly nodding, you shove your Ipad into your handbag next to the sofa.
"Yeah... Everything's fine. I'm just a little nervous about the meeting today."
"With that spoiled ass sponsor?"
You nodded again, kneading your hands restlessly in your lap. Carefully he puts one hand on yours and managed to cover both of your cramped hands with his.
Instead of a joke or a mean comment that you would have expected, his voice softened and he squeezed your hands reassuringly.
"You don't have to be nervous. Business people like that are often strange and not exactly sociable. They are assholes, but you're so adorable that he surely won’t refuse any of your wishes."
A worried sigh wrings itself from your throat and you finally managed to look him in the eye. Only now did he recognize the great concern on your face and moved instantly closer to you.
"What if I don't? What if I mess up and you lose a major sponsor because of me? They will fire me..."
His chocolate brown eyes seemed protective, eyeing you with such confidence that you wanted to snuggle up to him. He placed his other hand on your thigh and gently stroked it.
"You won't mess up. And even if it won't work out, we'll find another sponsor."
A soft laugh escaped you as he quoted you, and he too smiled in relief when he saw that energetic sparkle in your eyes again.
Minho was suddenly so gentle and caring in a way you had never witnessed. In front of the others, he always tried to appear tough and untouchable, always had a cheeky comment on his lips and seemed to let nothing upset him.
But right now his other side appeared. His touches were careful on your skin, as if he feared to break you and he was full of care. It’s a side of him that he reserved just for you.
You intertwined your hand with his and squeezed it gently. As you did so, your thighs were tight against each other and he gave you endless confidence with just that. He believed in you and that alone was such a big ego boost.
Your heart began to melt and your eyes were automatically on his engaging lips.
"Thank you Lino. That really helped. I didn’t know you could be so soft.”
Suddenly his facial expression changed. He looked confused, as if he had woken up from a dream, and quickly smiled again in amusement.
"That being said, you have Chan with you. He's gotten each of us out of trouble several times."
There he was again. The tough Lee Know, and he wondered to himself why he had suddenly gone so soft. It was your mere presence that made him protective. He enjoyed feeling your warm skin and seeing the happy twinkle in your beautiful eyes.
In fact, he managed to make you laugh again and it sounded better than music to his ears.
"Don't worry too much. We definitely won't give you back, kitten."
His hand squeezed your own protectively and it touched you that he dropped his walls in front of you. Without thinking, you leaned forward and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
You just could not have expressed your gratitude with words.
However, he froze completely and before you could pull away, he grabbed your face rougher than he wanted to. Firmly, he pulled you closer and it took you a few seconds to realise that his lips were already on yours.
Overwhelmed, you clenched your hands until you could feel his pleasant grip on your hip. The other hand was on your cheek and when you finally understood, you put all the desire and concern into the kiss.
At first he was slow, savoring every second until he took your lower lip between his teeth and let his tongue brush over it. As soon as you opened your lips a little, he pushed his tongue into your mouth and deepened the kiss with his whole body.
He seemed like an addict who couldn't get enough and became more and more impetuous. He tasted like a heady mix of sweet strawberries and spicy mint.
Finally he grabbed you by the hips and pulled you onto his lap, where he didn't stop licking his tongue into your mouth. Your hands went into his hair and tugged on his strands. His hands went on a ramble, pushing your dress up until he could firmly grip your ass.
A small squeak of pain escaped you as he squeezed tightly and you felt the corners of his mouth lift at your lips despite your eyes being closed.
"You even purr like a little kitten", he growled and you were completely caught in a trance of arousal and passion as he began to spread wet kisses on your collarbone. He sucked on your skin and pushed you demanding against his lap.
The little sighs and your tensed face made the blood rush between his legs and he wanted to fuck you right there against the couch. But he also loved to tease you until you would whimper and beg him to fuck you senseless. That made the painful erection in his pants much more worth it. His hand lightly brushed your thigh dangerously close to your core.
His tongue licked along your collarbone, down to your cleavage, where he slowly pulled the fabric down and worked on your soft skin so intensely with his mouth that you feared just coming from it on his lap.
The bruises Hyunjin had sucked into your skin were almost gone and Minho wanted to make sure, to mark you again so that the other members would see it. He wanted them to know that you were already his little toy and that they had to make a great effort, to get to him.
Overwhelmed, you felt his bulge feel frighteningly large beneath you and immediately you wanted to see if it was really as immense as it felt on your covered pussy. The straps of your white dress fell off your shoulders and Minho's hands kneaded the flesh on your ass so hard that you would definitely get bruises. But that only fueled the arousal in your whole body.
"Admit it, Kitten! You only put on that cute slutty dress to drive me crazy!", he murmured against your skin, and everything about him made you dizzy. A hard hiss escaped him and he looked up at you with an exited bliss in his eyes.
“Damn didn’t thought you’re so fucking needy, Baby.”
With questioning eyes you let your fingers go trough his soft hair.
“What?”
“You’re grinding on me”, he explained and kissed the heated skin of your almost bare tits.
Suddenly, you became aware of your own body, feeling him underneath you and trying to feel as much of him as you can. You feel pleasant heat spread through your body, pooling together between your legs where you were far too effected by the feeling of his erection beneath you and somehow you still couldn’t make yourself stop, even though he looked at you with a teasing smile.
“Oh god. I’m sorry”, you murmured against his neck, but then, you felt his hands wrap around your hips further, fingers digging into the side of your ass, and you realised he’s helping you guide your hips.
He smelled so good that you just couldn’t stop rolling your hips against his.
“No need to apologise. That’s so fucking hot”, he growled and pulled your chin back, to kiss you deeply, while he pushed you even further against his hard bulge.
”That’s it, there you go“, he said softly as you moan into his mouth and started to move your hips against his length and you couldn’t stop yourself from whimpering, when the only thing between your clit and his dick was the thin fabric of your clothes.
Suddenly his voice is right by your ear and snaps you out of your aroused trance, so close it sends shivers down your spine:
”You should have told me you like dry humping my dick this much. Fuck, it makes me so hard, can you feel that, kitten?“
You could just nod and get flustered by his words.
Your behaviour was so messy and desperate, even Minho started to lose himself and he kissed you as if he’s never kissed before. It’s more tongue and teeth than needed, tasting you and moaning into your mouth when your tongue meets his. It shouldn’t feel as good as it does. Someone could come in an catch you, how you pounce on each other like heated teenagers, but the hurried kisses make your head feel like it’s spinning.
It hasn’t been long, you know that, but you’re already started to get close. Like with Hyunjin, you felt things that you never had experienced before. There was something about these boys that made you go crazy and they definitely knew what they were doing.
Even though your underwear and his sweatpants were seperating you from feeling him, there was something so intense about this and about Minho that it hardly mattered, and you knew it won’t be long until he would get you making a mess in your panties.
Unable to keep up with how good it felt, luckily Minho still had a hold on you, and when he noticed that it’s getting more difficult for you to keep composed, he gripped your flesh even harder.
Embarrassed you hid your face in the crook of his neck as he guided you by the hips harder and harder against his hard dick. With one hand he pulled you back by the nape of the neck so that you had to look at him while you dry humped him like a kitty in heat.
"No hiding! I wanna see every adorable flustered expression you make!”, he demanded with a harsh tone, both of you trying to pull the other closer for more stimulation. Your hands still groped and scratched at eachothers skin as you desperately grinded on eachother.
He slipped one hand to your throbbing cunt and started to circle your clit, while you tried to get more friction. He was so hard by now that your mere movements on his dick almost made him come. But he did force himself to calm down because he just wanted to work you to an orgasm and see your beautiful face tensed with desire just for him.
”Don’t stop!“, he ordered and his harsh tone made you whimper.
”I want you to be good and cum for me like this, okay? Can you do that, kitten?“
As soon as he hit the sensitive part of your clit directly with his fingers, a naughty moan escaped you and you started to ride your cunt so hard against his cock that you had to claw your fingernails into his back.
“Fuck… Minho”, you cried and couldn’t think of something else than your high which was announced by the tremendous heat in your lower abdomen.
"Aw, you like that, baby?", he chirped with a growl and guided your hips so that he would still hit all your sweet spots through the fabric. You nodded, unable to speak, rocking your hips even harder against him and his fingers.
He pushed his fingers against your clit and noticed how your body tensed. Directly he accelerated the intensity and held your face tightly again with one hand in front of his so he could look at your teary eyes, swollen lips and aroused expression as he worked you to your orgasm with just the snapping of his hips and his hand. You wanted him as close as possibly and somehow this, his mouth mere millimeters from yours, swallowing your breath, wasn’t enough.
“I’m gonna cum…”, you whimpered and he hold your face even rougher, digging his fingernails into your soft cheeks.
“Look how easy it is to turn you into the neediest, sluttiest mess, kitten”, he growled and pressed you firmly onto his throbbing dick. The wet spot on his pants was already as big as a hand, but he couldn’t care less.
“Oh I can’t wait to fuck that soaked little cunt till you cry my name all night!“
Your hands clawed for some type of, literally any, support on his shoulders while he grabbed your ass harsh.
„Be a good little slut and come for me!“, he demanded and his words twisted your mind.
Eventually you got so caught up in the moment you won’t even were able to stay focused on talking, and he started thrusting up, meeting your hips so you didn’t have to do any work. It’s this that finally does it for you, his hands holding you and his hips meeting yours and you automatically imagine how he would fuck you like this. You wanted more and more, caught up in his scent, his words and his body and finally your orgasm crashed over you.
He helped you to ride your high out and gently brushed his hand over your back.
"Feel better now?", he asked and kissed each corner of your mouth.
„Yes… Thank you, Minho.“
A little huff escaped your lips, while you still rubbed your overstimulated pussy against his length. The friction felt too good to stop, even though your soaked cunt was now extremely sensitive. He laughed lightly and ran his hands through your hair as you let your lips brush over his neck
„Greedy but polite. I like that“, he teased and kneaded your ass again. He couldn’t get enough of the perfect curves and the softness of your skin against his fingertips.
„I want you to fuck me, Minho“, you mumbled against his skin and kissed the sensitive spot on his neck beneath his ear. He instantly got goosebumps and in response he moved your hips again more firmly against his now painful hard length.
He would not and could not wait any longer. He longed to sink into your wet core and fuck you so hard until you begged him to stop. Therefore, he reached for his waistband and pulled it down. With a liberated gasp, his boner popped out and you had to bite your lower lip when you realized that it was even bigger than it had felt through the fabric. He would split you open, but you didn't care. Impatiently he pushed your panties aside and as he slipped into your aching core with just the tip, you already felt, how he stretched you out. Slowly you grinded your hips against his, gasping as only his tip filled you painfully good.
You were so dizzy that you almost didn't notice how the door to the practice room were opened and Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Felix walked in.
It wasn't until Minho glanced over your shoulder in annoyance. Your heart skipped a beat as you saw the boys staring at you over your shoulder.
Hyunjin looked at you with a amused, yet unsurprised grin. Felix stared open-mouthed at your naked ass with the white thong on that Minho still had a firm grip on, and Jeongin looked perplexed but definitely aroused by the way you ass was wiggling and grinding against his friends dick.
In fact, the three were more than grateful to have burst into this situation.
"Can't you knock?", Minho spat at them, leaning his forehead against the crook of your neck to breathe in your sweet scent once more. His tip was already in your cunt and he considered, if he should just don‘t give a fuck about the others and push himself all the way into you. If he did that, he'd probably fuck you in front of them too. He already had to fight against his desire but your shocked face made him weak.
Hectically, you tugged your dress back down and adjusted the straps on your shoulders, while he slowly slipped out of you and tugged his dick into his pants.
"We've been knocking, calling and messaging", Felix said meekly, unable to get the image of Minho's hands all over you out of his head and immediately imagining what it would be like to have you sitting on his lap like that, riding his dick and moaning his name.
He cleared his throat and stared at the floor, trying not to get a boner in front of everyone like a needy little schoolboy.
"Yeah... but you seem to have been too busy. Obviously…”, Hyunjin said and his smile was breathtaking.
Minho let you off his lap only after a short resistance and cursed his members quietly. Jeongin was still frozen, looking at you as if you had just flown from heaven to earth.
Embarrassed, you fixed your hair, not resisting Hyunjin's intense gaze. To Felix, you almost wanted to apologize as his head glowed so much you could barely distinguish it from the red walls.
"You guys have to fuck everything up", Lee Know grumbled, leaning forward so they couldn't see the wet spot and the huge bulge in his sweatpants directly.
"We're really sorry, but we need you, Lino. We need to finally start working the choreography out."
Even though Hyunjin's eyes continued to rest on your boobs, he spoke normally to Minho. Gradually, your heartbeat calmed down and you tried to ignore what just happened. They almost caught you, fucking in the practice room. Anyone could have come in but Minho didn’t seem to care at all.
"You look stunning by the way, Jagi", Hyunjin said then and pulled you close to his chest. With his hands lingering on your back, he kissed you quickly. He just couldn’t resist you. The kiss was short but intense and you returned his smile with rosy cheeks.
"Yes. The dress is beautiful on you", Felix agreed and his cuteness sent butterflies in your stomach.
"Thank you. You guys are really sweet."
Jeongin still couldn't get a word out and shoved his hands into his pockets. Suddenly, you remembered something.
Panicking, you searched your phone in your bag and almost had a second heart attack as you read first the time and then Chan's messages where he asked when you guys are going to meet to prepare for the meeting.
"Shit!" you cursed, gathering your things. Along the way, you slipped on your Converse Chucks that you had left by the sofa.
"I have to go see Chan right now. Do you know where he is?"
Hyunjin shrugged and connected his phone to the stereo.
"He was still here this morning", Lee Know said from behind you.
Felix nodded and Hyunjin glanced over his shoulder briefly and replied:
"Yes, but left again around 10 o'clock."
Then Jeongin said:
"He was just at the dorm."
„Okay, Well shit. I'll go there then. We have the meeting in an hour. Fucking hell..."
As you storm out, a few more not so ladylike curses slipped out, due to the stress. The guys looked after you and Hyunjin sighed loudly.
"Is it just me, or is she even outrageously hot when she curses like a sailor?"
Lee Know snorted in amusement and the other two could only agree. Then Hyunjin looked back at Lee Know with a knowing grin.
Still irritated, he snapped at him:
"What?"
Hyunjin pouted his lips and shook his head defensively.
"Nothing. Just wondering why you decided to fuck her in the practice room, in the middle of the day, where anyone could have come in.“
„Thanks to you I didn't even get to fuck her yet“, he said sourly and the boys knew, that Lee Know would go hard on them today. He almost were able to fuck the hottest girl he ever met, and of course his stupid members had to screw it up.
"The choreographer is here“, Felix said, glancing at his phone.
"Do you want me to bring him in? He's been waiting for a while", Jeongin asked, to which Lee Know stood up, his hands in front of the big tent in his pants.
"Tell him he'll have to wait a few more minutes if he doesn't want to blow me."
Felix pressed his lips together and Jeongin looked at him in amazement, while Hyunjin laughed. As the door slammed shut behind Lee Know, Jeongin said monotonously:
"I definitely won't tell him that."
-> Part 7
——————————————————————-
© Sky-yuna — 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.
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iconocon · 1 year
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what about me | verstappen
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⚔︎ ✧ (short)
there he was.
a wet max verstappen stood in the doorframe of your apartment smelling like the mini-bar of a cheap hotel and it was not a good look on him. your eyes went from the bird's nest of a hair on his head to the dark wine-red half-smudged lipstick stain on his white collared shirt to the belt around his waist that was left on one notch too big.
"i didn't know where else to go"
"why would you come here"
"i needed you please don't make me go home"
you hated him. hated that he always knew exactly what to say to suck you in, to forgive him for the stupid shit he does but your heart was too big to kick the wet beaten-down puppy anymore so with a big sigh you stepped backward allowing him into the hallway.
"max"
you two knew each other well enough by this point that he automatically tried reaching to take off his wet black dress shoes but I'm sure the rain mixed with the cheap vodka was too much for him and he went tumbling to the wooden floor in a mess. if anything your patience with him was wearing thin and with one glance into your living you would see the big clock above your sofa laying out the time of 3:25 in the morning. so slowly getting down to his height you reached for one foot while he reached for the other, of course, you managed it way before him and even chuckled at the frustrated look on his face as he struggled with the knot he himself made which did all but distract his gaze to your face. the way he stared at you was unnerving, as if he wanted to say something so bad but didn't have the guts to do it and that probably scared you the most because if he of all people was scared to say something it was not something you wanted to hear.
"come"
before you could even say no or turn down the offer the man himself nudged your knee out from underneath you with just his foot laying you flat on ur butt/the wet footprints he made himself minutes before.
"what the fu-"
"i don't know who i am anymore" he interrupted and before you could say anything he stopped you with a hand on your knee as he stared mindlessly with glazed-over eyes into your beige wallpaper abyss of a hallway, "I'm not happy not at home, not on the track, I don't know how to make it okay again" you wanted to reach out and touch him but every time your fingers moved closer to his body he shifted around them so he was just so out of reach which at this point should have been a normal occurrence for you but it still didn't stop the pain in your chest. "i went out and i did what the guys wanted, i drank and drank, and i danced with some girl who only liked me fo-" the hiccup stopped he sentence but the lipstick mark on his collar told the story for him. "i wanted to be okay just for one night" this time you didn't allow him to push his body away from you and instead sat shoulder to shoulder with him grabbing his damp head and pulling it down into your lap. as you ran your fingers through his hair you hummed a familiar song that you both loved as children even going as far to label it as ‘your song’.
max was a tough guy. growing up in the way in which he did he wasn't allowed the luxury of being a crazy teen or a child that could talk back to his parents. he was a prodigy meant to be something greater than all the other kids on the block and you saw it in him the moment you met on track. at that time you wanted to be something too, you wanted to be bigger than all the stars, but reality set in for you too young making you realize that you weren't cut out for the same dreams as your peers however that didn't stop you from being a selfish child then adult and keeping him.
your crush on max was visible from day one, he was all chubby bright pink cheeks and fury. you want to say the first time you realized your crush was the same day he yelled at pierre gasly (one of your now both good friends) for pushing you off track after he broke late in one of the corners making you cry your eyes out because you were finally able to compete for a podium. it was dumb and it was stupid but he was your savior even as children making sure to do everything he could to make you laugh even making himself look stupid to onlookers in restaurants by putting straws up his nose one day when you were sad your mom said you couldn’t have ice cream.
when he too grew up and left it was probably the hardest thing you had to go through because to you he was your peace, your home, but as a teen, it was hard for you to realize at the time that you weren't his. racing took your best friend away, and it was bittersweet because he was so good. he was better than you thought he was, and now your drunk sad best friend was a two-time world champion who could be recognized around the world. for fucks sake he raced in countries you could only dream of on a normal person's salary and even when it felt like you grew so far apart you knew he still needed you as he did now. you were the one person in the world he knew he could come to and cry and cry and do it again until he couldn't feel any more but yet maybe he didn't understand why that hurt you. why right now as he was laying in your arms you were so focused on the way his heart skipped a beat when he snored that your own heartbeat fell in tune with him.
you loved max verstappen and even though you could never be enough for him you selfishly hoped now as you did as children that he would always need you even if that meant waiting forever but, for now, you slept dreaming of what it could be like if maybe just maybe he did too.
AN
this is so short and probably bad but i was SAD and i might delete it idk i haven't written in so long but i have a few in the chamber anyway pls send prompts I love u!
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f10werfae · 2 years
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Shorty McLovin
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pairing: Chris Evans x Short!Hairstylist! Reader
Summary: Chris and Y/n can’t keep their hands off each other, but that’s pretty obvious
Disclaimer: This story is fiction and should not be taken literally, the behaviour is simply imaginative and the content may be inappropriate
Warnings: Spit, dirty talk, mirror sex, daddy kink, size kink, squirt, tit play, penetration sex, dirty talk, humiliation, degradation, oral (female receiving)
- Requests are open!
Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️
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︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
(Y/n's P.O.V)
“Will you stop movin for two seconds” I groaned feeling Chris spin around in the seat, trying to avoid my hands which were trying to style his hair. Despite him sitting down, his 6ft frame still towered over me, the consequences of being short.
“You gotta catch me first sweetheart” He laughed dodging my hands, his face smiling brightly even though he had to be up from 5 that morning. I huffed setting down my comb and scissors, my hands settling onto my waist as I looked at him blankly.
“Come on mamas, m' jus playin' with ya” He whined noticing my stare, finally deciding to face me, picking up my comb and handing it back up to me.
I couldn’t help but notice those dark blue eyes of his peering up at me almost mocking me trying to be innocent, his body bulging in its white vest and boxer shorts. His hands then found my ass, holding onto my cheeks he pulled me closer, his hands just resting back there casually.
“Thank you daddy-” Kissing his lips I stood back up, not realising what I had said.
“D-did you just call me daddy?” Chris asked smugly, his hands stopping mine from reaching his hair.
“What? No I didn’t?”
“Uh yes you did bubby, heard it loud n' clear” Chris laughed standing up to his full height, my head just about reaching his chest, his fingers on my chin tilting my head up to look at him.
(Chris' P.O.V)
“C'mon baby you know I don’t like liars” I whispered, her big doe eyes looking up at me innocently, her face glowing in front of the light up vanity mirror. Her hands gripped onto my shirt, her mouth parted as she wondered what to reply with,
“U-uh well it was clearly an accident Chris, happens alla time”
“What so you call other guys daddy then huh?” I questioned, a feeling of possessiveness and jealousy bubbling in my chest at the idea of my woman even thinking about entertaining another man. My fingers reached up and tucked a bit of hair behind her ears, her beautiful face now in view.
“No! Why would you even say that? You know i’m yours and yours alone, plus no one compares to you” She pouted leaning up and pecking my lips cutely, intertwining her hands with mine by our sides; her energy just making me fall in love even more and just seeing how much she loves and cares for me.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
Chris let go of his girl's hands, his fingers reaching up to pull down the lock on the door beside them swiftly. Y/n stood quietly anticipating Chris' next move as he pulled down one of the thin straps of her blue tank top, the flimsy thing barely covering her hardened nipples.
“Chris we can’t, we’re at work” She whimpered, falling right into his handy work, her chest puffed out more to give him more access.
“Yeah? And whose the boss?” He asked with a smirk, pulling the top low enough to reveal her right breast, and boy did he waste no time in getting his paws all over it. He groped it so hard a mewl left the poor girl’s throat, his mouth suckling on her nipple, biting it here and there.
Her nipple now shone with Chris' spit on it, both of their eyes now hazed with desire and lust; complete and utter filthy thoughts.
“i wan’ you to look at yaself in the mirror while I fuck you alright?” Chris growled turning her to face the vanity, both of her hands planted onto the makeup station.
Chris couldn’t help but smile at his woman, all there laid out for him, and only for him. Not only that, but she just seemed to be made for him, both of their bodies connecting like a jigsaw.
With one swift movement he swiped down her underwear to cage her thighs together, her wetness starting to cause her crevices to glimmer. Chris bent down and took one good look at what was his,
“You just smell so fucking delicious baby, ya want me to eat ya out from behind? Treat you like my own fuckslut?”
“Mhm” Y/n whimpered, her knuckles had gone white at this point from how hard she was gripping the table. She couldn’t help but look at herself in the mirror, her face was flushed as one of her tits were just hanging out in the open for him to see.
Chris opened up her ass cheek and licked a stripe from her wet pussy up, a moan instantly left Y/n's mouth, her pussy only tingling for more of his wet tongue.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
(Chris' P.O.V)
Flattening my tongue I flicked through her folds, feeling her legs shudder slightly from instability, her arousal practically dripping at this point.
“Hurry up baby, your call time is soon” I heard her say, her body shoving her pussy onto my face as I felt her grind onto it.
“Yes baby, grind on my face like that” I growled holding onto her thighs as she humped my face without abandon, her hand grabbing onto my hair to ground herself even deeper, at this point she was just fucking herself using my nose and mouth.
“Come on baby, cum in daddy’s mouth like a sweet girl”
(Y/n's P.O.V)
“Mhm i’m gonna cum daddy, gon' cum right on your face” I moaned out, my hips moving out of my control, his nose and mouth were double teaming my swollen hot red pussy, my clit being stimulated by the stubble on his face.
“OaOh Fuck FUCK FUCK FUCK DADDY” I screamed shaking and humping his face furiously like a mad woman, feeling a gush of cum just spray onto his face aggressively. The pornographic sounds of him slurping it all up filled the room, my face was contorted to one of pleasure, my eyes had rolled to the back of my head and I was drooling from the mouth.
“Gah baby you got daddy all wet” He chuckled standing up behind me, his thick fingers running along my sensitive folds, my body leaning back into his for warmth and love. His hair was wet with me squirting, the bottom of his face shiny with my cum.
Turning my head around me spat right into my open mouth, the taste of my cum filling my mouth was instantly overtaken by his tongue licking all over my mouth. Whatever wetness was on his face had now transferred over to mine, adding to the amass of filth on us.
Pushing me to lean down a little, his tongue left mine, his larger body caged me in.
“Don’t know if you’re ready for my cock sweetheart, you’re so small I might break daddy’s little pussy” He cooed in a humiliating tone, his index finger edging the entrance of my wet hole, my hips rolling against him every time he did.
“Please daddy, I need it, use your sweetheart’s wet little hole” I whimpered rubbing my ass onto his now naked body, his hardened cock grinding against the curve of my ass erotically.
“Hmm I don’t know hunny, you’re too little” He grinned devilishly, his hand caressing my jaw tenderly before he harshly pushed it against the mirror.
His cock tearing into my pussy roughly, absolutely pounding the fuck out of it, my moans coming out muffled due to the hand on my cheek pushing me against the cool mirror.
“Aw good girl, would ya look at that? Your pussy fits my cock fucking perfectly” He laughed out, one hand holding onto my love handles, his other hand holding onto my shoulder to help keep me up.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
(Chris' P.O.V)
“D-daddy i’m gonna cum again, hug me while I cum? please?” she moaned out suddenly and then I knew she was feeling extremely vulnerable. Pulling out and turning her around, I lifted her up and started fucking her straight away. My arms wrapped around her ass as she continued humping my cock, her arms wrapped tightly around my neck with her head hidden into my chest.
I felt her lips pepper little kisses along my chest, her tongue ever toying with my nipple causing me to bite my lip even harder. The things this woman did to me.
“Fuck Y/n i’m about to-“
“Do it inside of me baby, wanna feel you cum inside my wet swollen pussy” She moaned out, her voice now sounding hoarser and sultry.
“Y/n baby oh my god, shit fuck-“ Shouting out an array of curses I felt myself spill inside of her, her body still clinging onto mine mercilessly, my hands now coming up to wrap around her back as I sat us both down onto the big makeup chair.
Even being in my arms accentuated the fact she was so short, and not going to lie that brought something out of me, something no one else did. I felt her breathing slowly calm down, with her still straddling me I felt her kisses move up to my neck to my face.
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
Both of them looked gently and lovingly at each other, Chris brushed back some of his woman’s hair, her head nuzzling into the touch of his hand softly. After some hot steamy sex both of them tended to be even more physically affectionate, if that was even possible.
“You okay sweetheart? Need some water?” Chris bent down grabbing his pink water bottle (it was actually Y/n's but she left it at his house so much it became is) He lifted up the bottle to her lips and rubbed her back soothingly as she took large gulps. A lazy glowing smile was on her face, as she lay back onto Chris' chest
“You okay Chris?”
It was now her turn to ask, picking up her captain America water bottle she gave him some, both of them acting like highschoolers stupidly in love.
“When we get home, we are having a major cuddling session with Dodge” Chris said kissing her shoulder and pulling her top back up, she nodded enthusiastically caressing the apples of his cheeks with her fingers
“Omg wait Chris your hair, my cum-“
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
“Hey Y/n what did you do with chris’ hair today” The director asked walking up to the shorter woman, watching as she packed away her hair supplies from the “dirty” vanity.
“u-uh-“
“Don’t worry I think it looks amazing, I even told Chris i’d prefer if it was like that for the whole shoot this week, if that’s ok?”
A red blush captured her cheeks as she nodded sheepishly, the director left the room leaving her to smile embarrassingly
“Everyday this week? Really?”
———
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ruinedbylanadelrey · 9 months
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Just imagine Reader taking care of Din’s injuries after he was in a big fight and got lots of cuts and bruises on his chest and back. Of course it starts to turn intimate and Din wants some, but Reader reminds him he’s hurt. It would be steamy, sweet, and funny all at once.
Like You Do | Din Djarin x f!Reader
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"You're the one I can't lose, no one loves me like you do" - Joji, Like You Do
summary: Din comes back to the crest hurt and her heart just breaks at the sight of her strong Mandalorian crumbling to his knees. warnings: 18+, MINORS DNI, descriptions of blood, cuts, and needles, his name is din not djarin (i'm sorry he is 4ever din<3), razor crest lives forever, mando'a use, no grogu, reader is so in love with, din is a simp, mando's helmet comes off (i'm sorry), sexual tension, touching, groping, kissing, din begging to be fucked AN: I have had this request in my drafts forever because i kept re writing it so here is the final product. I want to clarify that Din Djarin is my #1 man, i know it's shocking because I write about Joel mostly. But Din is my soulmate and I'm a little embarrassed to share my thoughts about Din. Like my room color scheme is grey, silver, and black I re did my room back when The Mandalorian came out. That's my little secret<3 anyways enjoy my little fantasy<3333 masterlist
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translations: cyar’ika- darling, beloved, sweetheart Udesii- "take it easy" Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum- "I love you/I know you forver"
Din could feel the sliced skin stretch with each step he took, all he could smell is blood, blaster smoke, and sweat. His breathing was uneven and his body trembling when he made it to the crest, falling to his knees as he heard your sweet honey voice calling out to him.
"Din! Maker! I don't know where you're bleeding from!" You slide to your knees taking the large Mandalorian into your arms, laying him against your chest, your hands working quickly removing his armor except for his helmet. His flight suit was torn on his left side at the waist, his flesh gashed, red bleeding into the meat of his skin. He needs bacta but the hard stuff. 
Din said he will only use it if you were the one hurt; your mind replayed that whole argument when you guys finally gave in and fell through the thin wire of tension cutting it when he thrust himself into your hot core.
You asked him, 'Why can't we use it on you if it ever comes down to it?'
'I will do whatever it takes to keep you alive...you're the one I can't lose.'
You scoffed at him and just spat 'So I can lose you and feel the exact same pain you would feel for me'
'You're so much stronger than me in every single way, cyar’ika' Din chokes up and it broke your heart seeing be so emotional. He was a cold-hearted person until you came along as another recuse he collected. You brought your sunshine and melted away the winter in his heart. 
The movie in your head clears when you grabbed the needle of bacta and pinched his skin near the gash and pushed the medicine into his muscles. Din's screams were so visceral and his hands grip your thighs, bruising them to a deep purple. "Udesii! Udesii!" You cry out as you throw the empty syringe across the hull.
His body jolts while the bacta runs through his body, you composed yourself and grab the medpack pulling out the field cauterizer. You laid him on his right side while you fused his skin back together. Burning flesh filled the air making your bile come up your throat burning it and leaving a sour taste in your mouth, your hands slick from sweating and his blood. 
Din going limp and taking shallows breaths submitting to you saving him. You wiped your hands on your pants and laying him on his back, you sobbed as you cupped the cheek of his helmet with your hands.
"Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum" Din strangles to say holding your wrist in his hand, pressing your hand closer to the beskar. You collapsed on top of him, your body jerking from the hiccups and sobs leaving your mouth. Din wraps his arms around holding you like a child holding his favorite toy close so it won't leave his sight. 
"You're so dramatic, little girl" Din takes a deep breath and laughs it out. You craned your neck to him without his helmet. You quickly turned away, you panic and guilt slamming into your heart. "I want you to see me, cyar’ika" Din grabs your chin and tilts your head where your eyes are burning into his brown eyes.
You swallow as your eyes dance around his face, taking his eyes, the scruff on his face, patchy in a few spots, his mustache bringing attention to his plump lips, so pink and kissable. 
"You were crafted by the maker, din" You trace his nose with your fingertip, taking in how his skin feels on yours. "Kiss me, little girl, please" He whimpers while you thumb over his bottom lip. The need in his voice made you ache between your thighs. You carefully straddle his waist and bring your lips to his, Din sits up groaning while he licked in your mouth, his hands exploring up and down your back, his hands grabbing your ass and squeezing so hard. 
You gasp and moan "Din...you're h-" he cuts you off and bites your lip. He grabs your hand and places it on top of the outline of his hard cock. "C'mon baby, let's fuck," his words entice you as you tighten your grip around his clothed length, and he winces and whimpers and you remembered you're the stronger one and need to stop this so he could rest.
"Din, no you need to rest," he kisses your neck and bites at the thin skin. "Little girl, let's have fun..." That damn name made you want to say screw it. "Let's sleep, I'm tired and you have to be too," You helped Din to the steel slab that he calls a bed and lays down holding out his arms for you to be his human-weighted blanket. 
"We will talk about the bacta when we wake up" Din mumbles as sleep takes over him and relaxes with you on top of him. 
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miguels-wifey · 9 months
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HIDE AND SEEK
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WARNINGS: NSFW, fluff, bit of angst (or a lot, i could be lying)
WORDS: 1.8k
SUMMARY: he usually knows where gabi hides, why doesn't he know today? he isn't your miguel, but you're his y/n.
A/N: my neighbors are arguing, i wrote this at 2:35 am.
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“Ay, Dios. Gabi.. where are you, mija?” Miguel looked around the house, playing hide and seek never ended well. Considering that he was the leader of their Spider-Man cult— thing, Gabriella always hid in good places.
“She's right over there, Mig.” you whisper to him as he walks past your bedroom. “Papa! You found me!” she giggled as Miguel took her in his arms. “As much as I love you two, Gabi, baby, you have school tomorrow. It's late, go to bed. Darling, you have work in the morning.” the father-daughter duo huffed in disappointment but reluctantly said goodnight and retreated to their bedrooms.
You peered over at your husband as he sat on the edge of the bed. “What was that back there?” you asked, not a serious question. You were simply asking why he needed you to help find Gabriella. Usually, he would find her pretty quickly. “What do you mean, cariño?” you shrug, brushing off your slight curiosity. “Nevermind, maybe she just hid well today.” you muttered as you flipped through pages of your book. “Okay... Goodnight, mi amor.” your eyes hovered over his wrist. He wasn't wearing it. When you two became started dating, so many years ago, it's funny now that you recall it all. You made him a bracelet with your initials and his— cheesy, you knew it too, but he loved it and wore it till now. The only times he took it off was when he showered, before work and during sex. Always managed to remember to put it on right after work.
“Babe, where's your bracelet?” you were replied with soft snoring by your waist. What has gotten into him? You quietly set down your book and turned off the bedside lamp. “I love you.” you thought you heard Miguel mumble against your skin as he pulled you closer. “I love you too, big guy.” you leaned forward to press a gentle kiss on his forehead.
Miguel has been... more affectionate, no— you couldn't really describe his recent behavior. But you knew his love for you and your daughter didn't change. It felt like he was grasping onto what was left of his life. As if you and Gabi would disappear into thin air. You did. But you don't need to know that. He seemed forgetful. His daily routine seemed out of place to you. He would forget things, or that was what he told you at least. He forgot to take Gabriella to soccer practice after school one day. He never forgets.
“Mierda. Lyla, I need you to pull up the damn anomaly diagnostics. I don't want anything messing up.” Miguel grumbled as a hologram popped up from his watch, “you got it grumpy!” he looked at the diagnostics. Everything was okay. Everything was perfectly fine, just the way things should be. “Thank you.” he took off the watch. He never glitched— for some odd reason, it only happened to the other spiders. Maybe because he went through so many universes to find you, you and Gabi.
“Honey, we're home!” you shouted from the living room, loud enough for him to hear. “Papa! Look what mommy bought for me!” the little girl held out a teddy bear almost taller than her. It had beady eyes and a little bow tie. “That's so cute, mija! Did you thank mama?” she nodded with a huge grin on her face, “it's so fluffy. I love it!” she squealed as she ran to her bedroom.
“Gabi wanted pizza for dinner, sooo we are ordering in. Thank God, I didn't feel like cooking tonight.” you groaned as your smaller frame was engulfed by Miguel's arms. “How was work, Miggy?” his fingers ran through your hair, “boring. No lab explosions today.” you snickered at his words. “That does seem pretty boring,” you say with a click of your tongue. He chuckled as you moved to look at him. “Y'know, your mom said that it was about time Gabi had a little brother or sister.” Miguel's smile grew, “she did?” you hummed, “mhm... although I think she just wants another grandchild.”
Without any further questions, you found yourself laying in bed on your back with your husband's hands gripping onto your waist and your nails digging into his back. “Slow down, Miguel!” you whined as he pounded into you, “I'm sorry–” he catches his breath as his movements slow down, “are you alright? Did I hurt you? I'm sorry- I didn't mean to..” you shook your head. “No, I'm fine. I'm okay, Mig. Still in one piece.” you laughed as you brought your lips to his cheek. “It's not funny, cariño. I'm not laughing.” he pulled out of you and slipped his boxers back on. “My husband usually gets my jokes. Are you sure that you're him?” you joked, not knowing that your little joke would cause him to freak. He froze at your words, “what? What's wrong? Darling?”
“Nothing. Everything is just fine,” perfectly fine.
Nothing was perfectly fine. He wasn't your Miguel, and he knew it. He wouldn't get your little inside jokes, and your suspicions grew, but thankfully, he managed to get past your questions. He tried to get as much information about your universe's Miguel from HQ as he could. He knows that you two went to the same high school, you became friends in college, and then started dating. He proposed 4 years into your relationship. A year later, you got married, and your dress was classy, elegant. “Men wear boring suits you can never depend on one for fashion advice”, you said that in your toast to him. The wedding was on the beach, it was spring. Not summer– you loved summer, but a summer wedding would've been too late into the year.
You were pregnant with Gabi a year and a half after your wedding. The three of you celebrated Gabi's 6th birthday at Chuck E. Cheese, she begged for a birthday there but ended up terrified of the robot rat. Or is he a mouse? You never knew the difference. But, she was so scared of him that she slept in your bedroom that night.
A few months later, your Miguel died. You didn't know. You didn't know he was Spider-Man. He died saving the city. Although it was a sad thing, Miguel couldn't help but take his place. So he took it. He knew you. You were just like his y/n. The only difference was the memories you shared.
“Shit, that's the pizza guy.” you got up from the bed and swiftly put on your clothes. You sprinted over to the front door, paid and thanked the delivery guy, and set the boxes on top of the dining table. “Miguel! Gabi! Dinners here, come on.” you saw them pop out of the hallway and take their spots at the dinner table. “Mommy after I finish eating dinner, can we play Hide and Seek tonight?” Gabriella asked, her little legs swinging back and forth from her chair. “I don't see why not. Who's gonna be the seeker, baby?” Gabi smiles and points at Miguel, “Papa!”
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