Tumgik
#9/10 someone is not stealing from you
vvizardz · 8 months
Text
I think one of my biggest self insert oc/sona artist dreads is making designs based after my own physical appearance and someone genuinely comes forwards to say "you stole my oc/you stole my design" Do I just go up to all the mirrors and cameras in my home and smash them as punishment then? It sounds like a plan but I don't think it's the correct one...herrrm
4 notes · View notes
ifearzombies · 1 year
Text
Things You Do Living At The HoL
1- Whenever you make yourself food in the kitchen you make three servings. One for you and two for Beel. Beel will smell it and you can never, ever not have something for him.
2- You buy every magazine Mammon is featured in. He makes royalties off of that and you want to support your first man in everything he does.
3- You check on Lucifer’s office every night. You either are bringing him coffee, offering to help, or are ushering him to bed depending on what he’s working on.
4- You text Diavolo, Barbatos, and the PH group every night to tell them you love them and that you’ll see them tomorrow since you can’t say goodnight in person most nights.
5- You find yourself saying “God” a LOT less. Either the angels are offended because you’re using their father’s name in vain. Or the demons are offended because you’re mentioning someone who hates them/their father they hate. It’s almost eradicated from your vocabulary.
6- When in the Human Realm and you see religious people you have to walk by them quickly because you can’t tell them how much you know about God, Demons, and the afterlife.
7- On nights you can’t sleep, you find yourself in the kitchen either talking to Beel or making food for him. You cherish those late night talks.
8- When Levi has a raid planned and you can’t stay with him, you check on him as much as possible to see if he needs anything.
9- You gave up trying to clean Satan’s room. But you DO check to make sure he’s not buried under books. Again. You’ve found him a few times under a bookalanche.
10- You make sure to tell Asmo he’s beautiful at least once a day. He pouts if you don’t.
11- You make sure Belphie wakes up long enough to do his schoolwork on days he does virtual schooling. On days he goes to RAD, you check to see how he’s doing.
12- On days you are in charge of dinner (volunteering or scheduled), you tend to make foods that are easy to make in bulk. Spaghetti, pancakes, quesadillas, and so forth. Not just because of Beel’s appetite (though that is the main reason), but this is a house of 7 men who are pretty fit. They all have a very healthy appetite. Plus there’s ALWAYS a chance for the PH group or Diavolo & Barbatos to come by.
13- You don’t lock the door when you use the bath in the main bathroom of the HoL. In the event someone desperately needs the toilet/sink in there, you don’t want to get up out of the water to open the door. Too much hassle.
14- You have a specific spot you sit at in the living room. The demons are weirded out by you have a particular spot you like, but they’ve avoided sitting there so that they’re never in the way.
15- You look at the sky to tell the time. You’ve started to figure out when it’s day or night depending on the moon’s positions and the stars in the sky. Specific hours still require a watch/clock. But day or night, you’ve got it mostly down.
16- You keep a shelf of books in your room for Satan. They’re mostly cat mystery novels since he loves detective novels and cats. You steal them back from his room, though, so he can’t add them to the mess that is his room.
17- You check on the pranks for the Anti-Lucifer League and work with them on good times for pranks. You’ve explained that if he’s not busy with something important, it’s more aggravating to him. They don’t believe you, but they sometimes listen to you when you ask them to hold off on a prank.
18- You tend to ask Mammon and Satan to go grocery shopping with you. Mammon can find the best deals and Satan is knowledgeable about what’s freshest in the store. Beel eats while he shops and groceries are more when he’s there. Belphie gets tired, Levi complains the whole time, Asmo just looks at reflective surfaces and slows the process down, and Lucifer is usually too busy.
19- You don’t watch porn. You can’t. Asmo can tell when you do because he can just sense when you’re horny and he tells EVERYONE. It’s embarrassing and sometimes you just want to have some self service time rather than end up in a wheelchair!
20- The wheelchair. It started as a joke from Solomon, honestly. Teasing that you likely have so much intimacy you struggle to walk. Diavolo didn’t realize he was joking and actually bought it for you. So you do actually own a wheelchair at the HoL. It’s in your closet, all charged up (Diavolo sprung for a fancy motorized one). When you feel like messing with the brothers, you’ll break it out and use it around the first floor and then they get to try and figure out who made you use it. It slightly backfires if anyone comes to visit though.
Solomon starts flirting and stating that he’d like a turn to make you use it. Simeon turns redder than a tomato. Luke gets mad and yells at the demons for hurting you, assuming they’ve injured you by their fighting (NO ONE IS CORRECTING HIM FOR FEAR OF ANGERING SIMEON). Barbatos frets over you being injured. Diavolo just teases you and asks if the chair is comfortable enough.
4K notes · View notes
double--blind · 7 months
Text
(SPOILERS) breaking down how obsessed Andrew is w/his sister bc he's a repressed lil liar and I'm going insane
This post got longer than I intended it to
1. He claims they don't spend enough time apart from each other to even begin missing her so he doesn't even know if he would, but just earlier in the game he was apart from her for probs like 30 mins tops to investigates some cultists and guess what???? He was already missing her 😒
Tumblr media
2. Says "I thought you grew out of this touchy-feely crap" when Ashley asks for a hug, but earlier when he was cooking dinner, he was the one with the inexplicable urge to "pull this broody bitch into [his] arms and force her to stay until she smiles" 😒
Tumblr media Tumblr media
3. Piggy-backing off the last screenshot: WHAT OTHER THOUGHTS, ANDREW??? yOU WERE JUST THINKING ABT HUGGING HER. WHAT DO YOU EVEN MEAN. THESE ARE SIMPLY INNOCENT BROTHERLY THOUGHTS ARE THEY NOT????? 🤨🤨🤨
Tumblr media Tumblr media
4. Bro just can't keep his hands off her. And everyone thinks Ashley's the clingy one jeez (lol the way he springs apart from her when Mom catches them is definitely definitelyyyy not worth analyzing. nope. not even when it happens a second time on the couch. nope. nooope)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
5. What. What is he thinking here. Don't think I don't see those grey lil blush lines. Is this connected to my third point somehow bc like... 🤨😬 Is "Andrew" is gonna start doing and being what "Andy" was too spineless and afraid of doing?? That's what the vow was partly abt right?? Does that include—
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
5. WHEWWW BOY that little flashback with his gf has so much baggage in it I just wanna dissect. His girlfriend's tryna have a serious discussion with him abt his weird sister for the sake of bettering their relationship bc she genuinely loves him, but he just gets caught up in fondly talking abt said weird sister instead??
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
6. He's awfully hesitant abt Ashley learning some independence, bc y'know what?? I think he doesn't really want her to stop relying on him. But what do I know y'know
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
6. Wants his gf to put tie her hair up in a ponytail, then when she refuses bc he'll pull on it, says it's just "how boys express their love". Well. You know who else puts there hair up in a ponytail??? You know who else's hair he's always pulling on and touching???
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
7. The voicemails in his gf's phone left by Ashley are heard by him in his dreams, and his dreams are a construction of his mind utilizing his memories, personal hangups, and knowledge of Ashley. The voicemails irl were left on his gf's phone, and for all we know, he never actually listened to them in person. Bearing this in mind... odds are the things Ashley's saying contain bits of truths he believes within himself, filtered thru her crude, hateful dialogue.
Here. I transcribed one of them...
"DO YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME!? Just because you can fuck him and I can't? You think that's love?! Are you fucking delusional?? Cumdumpsters like you are just that. He will never love you. Not like he loves me. I am the only one. I am everything. I am the secrets you'll never hear. When he lies in bed at night, and when he needs someone to hold on to… It's not you he seeks out. It is me."
8. Claims Ashley's the one with the jealous streak, not him, but I think he's just as bad. The only difference is that Ashley's never given him reason to act on it since all she's ever wanted was him, but at the slightest mention of her gettin it on w/someone else, even as a joke, he gets mad. "OVER MY DEAD BODY!!" he says, when she's jokingly contemplating getting knocked up via the neighbor so an ambulance would come for her. "I wouldn't let them," he says, when she's complaining abt not being pretty enough for the wardens to bang her
Tumblr media Tumblr media
9. Going hand-in-hand with that fact, he's intensely protective of her. Didn't hesitate to cleaver the warden who found her in the closet (probs didn't even BLINK lmaooo he chose VIOLENCE), and when the cake-stealing cultist insulted her just once, he stepped forward just like that
10. In their apt, when they were lying on the floor talking abt jumping off the balcony, he was really caught up in the "romantic" fantasy of them committing a double suicide and dying with their bodies entwined so irreparably by the impact they form one unified corpse "never to be separated!" and they get buried in the same coffin together. UM??? Bro fr thought he was the sane one of the two. That wasn't even true before the cannibalism and demon summoning 😭😭😭
BONUS:
11. This might just be me, but his reaction to seeing the post-sex vision doesn't strike me as someone who's inherently opposed to the idea. Instead of disgusted, he was... flustered?? He acted like she walked in mid-guilty pleasure wet dream. This wasn't a "GROSS THATS INCEST" reaction which is... the most normal reaction to have. That's the face of a man that got CAUGHT bro.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
He asks "we're not like that, are we?" and "why are you like this?" and questions the veracity of the vision, but he never actually explicitly denies wanting the vision to happen, more focused on Ashley and her reaction. He buries the elephant under the rug as fast as he can, bc yeah, it struck a landmine, but it probably wasn't a landmine for the reason Ashley thinks it is. I bet the vision just hit a little too close... :P
2K notes · View notes
leaentries · 23 days
Text
headcanons | luke hughes
SUMMARY: boyfriend!luke
WARNINGS: not proofread
more boyfriend!player headcanons
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
✮. he’s a shy lover! luke has a hard time expressing his emotions sometimes, so he often finds himself shying away or hiding his face into the crook of your neck while the two of you have a heart to heart moment. he’ll turn all red a blushy the second you start loving all up on him, especially when you tell him how amazing he is.
✮. PLAYING WITH HIS HAIR!! luke turns to absolute putty the second your fingers come into contact with his curls. like you could just be chillin on the couch and your hands will somehow find the back of his head. no joke, he will literally fall sideways into your lap so you can have a better reach. 9 out of 10 times he will most likely fall asleep.
✮. a huge foodie. loves loves loves to eat with you. we are all aware that the team calls him rusty because he’s always eating. will always have your favorite snacks in his bag so you’re never hungry. is always concerned about whether you’re eating enough or drinking enough. will take it upon himself to be with you for at least one meal of the day. yes, he does have dinner dates with you over facetime during roadies.
✮. along with this, he loves to facetime you! whenever possible, if he’s isn’t with you that is, he wants to be able to see your pretty face and yap to you about the most random things. whether it’s about your toast getting burnt or his charger breaking, you’ll talk about it.
✮. always listens to you intently. luke is the type of guy who will always make eye contact with you while you’re talking and will actively engage with you. he wants to make sure you know he’s listening and cares about what you’re saying. will bend down to your height and lean his ear in closer if you’re on the quieter side.
✮. leaves his clothes at your place on “accident.” new-flash, it’s never on accident. if luke stays at your apartment for more than a few hours there is a 90% chance he’s gonna end up leaving a hoodie or pair of sweats behind. you’ll end up getting a “i’m coming back over” text from him an hour after he left. he does this for two reasons: 1. he makes sure to give himself a legit excuse to come back and see you 2. he knows you’ll probably end up stealing said clothing item and wearing it.
✮. continuing from the last point, luke melts every time you wear something of his or something with his name on it. a little piece inside of him jumps for joy every time he sees you wearing one of his hoodies or showing up to games in his jersey. it helps ease the bit of him that gets insecure sometimes. it’s a way of telling the world that your his girl.
✮. he’s a puppy. period. he follows you around the apartment 24/7 if you’re together. never wants to leave your side unless he absolutely has to. will always pull your body into his in public so his mind is at ease. when his anxiety or worries spike, he is rushing to find or call you. you are his comfort blanket.
✮. let’s you pick out his outfits. luke had a tendency to have questionable style from time to time, so you took the liberty of making sure he is at least matching colors. you are tired. he does not like to listen, but will inevitably always wear what you tell him to.
✮. big napper/snuggler. will cocoon the both of you in blankets till you can barely move. has an alarm on his phone everyday to remind the both of you to take a nap together. doesn’t give you an option about it either. if you don’t feel like napping with him before a game, he will whine and pester you claiming that “it’s your fault if we lose” or “you’re my good luck charm, pretty girl. you have to nap with me or i won’t play good.”
✮. someone please find me a luke hughes
560 notes · View notes
uniteds · 11 months
Text
stuff that happened in the 2022/2023 football season that should send us into a coma but we’re too desensitized:
1. the whole ass world cup in the middle of the season. what was that
2. manchester united sacking ronaldo and announcing a sale of the club in the middle of the world cup
3. ronaldo getting dropped at the world cup and his replacement scoring a hattrick immediately after
4. keeping up with the belgians (world cup edition)
5. keeping up with the belgians (courtois saying he doesn’t respect kdb after stealing his missus)
6. ronaldo stans beefing with a little moroccan girl
7. the kingdom of saudi arabia buying newcastle united and then telling the premier league that they didn’t and the premier league going “oh okay if you say so”
8. megan thee stallion being romelu lukaku’s date to lautaro martinez’s wedding
9. pique cheating on shakira and then shakira releasing a diss track about it
10. shakira figuring out pique cheated on her because someone ate her strawberry jam and pique doesn’t eat strawberry jam
11. apparently the girl pique cheated on shakira with (clara) cheating on pique with pep
12. wagatha christie libel case
13. real madrid dropping a video accusing barcelona of fascism and the government of cataluyna getting involved
14. the pope coming out as a manchester united fan
15. the one napoli fan that basically made zielinski strip on the pitch
16. mount vesuvius park shutting down because napoli fans wanted to fake an eruption as a celebration
17. frank lampard taking everton into a relegation battle, getting sacked, and then taking chelsea into a relegation battle
18. on that note: chelsea were in a relegation scrap and finished 12th
19. mourinho lost his first ever european final to sevilla europa league black magic
20. whatever the fuck borussia dortmund did on the last day of the bundesliga season
21. anthony martial’s ex wife chasing his first wife down a french motorway with a baby in the passenger seat
22. psg suspending messi because he took an unsanctioned trip to saudi arabia and then unsuspending him two days later because they didn’t want people talking about geopolitics
23. the absolutely bizarre messi apology video released by psg
24. spurs refunding their fans’ tickets after being embarrassing
25. pep’s heartbreak over the fact julia roberts is a manchester united fan
26. chelsea scored one goal in the month of april
27. chelsea and spurs had six managers between them and won one match combined between march and april
28. mourinho fighting anthony taylor after the europa league final
29. milan derby in the ucl for the first time since 2005
30. luis enrique saying he’s cool with the spanish players having sex during the world cup as long as they’re not having orgies
31. luis enrique saying he doesn’t have sex anymore unless his wife wants to
32. man city charged with 115 counts of financial doping and trying to get the barrister in charge disqualified because he’s an arsenal fan
33. mourinho wire-taping himself to catch referees being corrupt
34. ryan reynolds and mac from it’s always sunny in philadelphia buying a football club and that football club getting promoted
35. pele died rip
36. women football awards sponsored by shein and klarna having a category for “male football ally of the year” and it’s just random men that went to one (1) women’s game
37. barcelona negreia case (how do you say calciopoli in catalan?)
38. infantino saying he feels gay, african, like a migrant worker, disabled, arab, and qatari
39. infantino saying he was oppressed as a child because he was ginger and italy is not safe for gingers
40. david alaba’s father in law getting arrested for being one the leaders of a far right group plotting to overthrow the german government
41. richarlison being tumblr’s it girl for a month and then not scoring a goal for the next four
42. juventus being in the middle of another corruption scandal and being docked points because of it
43. two teams getting investigated by the british government for playing football the weekend the queen died
44. gavi getting a yellow card in the first minute of a football match
45. pogba’s brother was arrested by french authorities for being part of a group-organized extortion attempt against pogba
46. richarlison getting a tattoo of neymar’s face and neymar paying him 30k to get it removed
47. iker casillas coming out, puyol implying they had a thing, and both of them retracting it in the most misha collins way possible.
48. sane and mane fight
49. zlatan retired from football
50. barca withholding about 50 million in wages from their players and somehow frenkie still didn’t want to join manchester united
2K notes · View notes
mooooonnnzz · 11 months
Text
don’t text and swing! // miles morales x reader
Tumblr media
miles loves texting and he loves you, what could go wrong?
cute lil miles texting headcanons
sum short n simple
readers gender not rlly specified
ooc miles?? idfk how he would text so i tried my best 😭
requests r open!!
miles says mentirosa that jus means liar
⊱ ────── {⋅. ✯ .⋅} ────── ⊰
🕷️ You’re never guaranteed a full on conversation with Miles because most the time he leaves you on open. He doesn’t do it on purpose, really. He just so happens to be a very busy man so trying to talk to him when he isn’t saving New York is pretty difficult.
9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: Hey did u still one of my jackets
9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: *steal idk how i got still
9:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: Anyways I cant find it anywhere and ik u have something to with it
10:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: I know ur not ignoring me rn…
10:01 pm [ you ]: oh wow of course im the first person you blame
10:01 pm [ you ]: also i dont have it ☝️
10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: Who else would take my jackets??
10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: This also isn’t the first time my jackets OR hoodies have gone missing
10:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: And somehow they always end up in your room
10:03 pm [ miles <3 ]: Suspicious right…🤨
10:06 pm [ you ]: oh shit by some magical force
10:06 pm [ you ]: your jacket managed to teleport to my bed!!
10:07 pm [ you ]: and somehow…IT FLEW ON ME?? AND NOW IM WEARING IT?
10:07 pm [ you ]: this is actually crazy…
10:15 pm [ you ]: wait miles where did you go
10:25 pm [ you ]: are you mad?
10:30 pm [ you ]: no way ur mad
10:40 pm [ you ]: MILES
10:42 pm [ you ]: HELLO
10:43 pm [ you ]: MILESSSS
10:56 pm [ you ]: oh wait mb you’re probably busy saving somebody
10:56 pm [ you ]: got a lil crazy there
10:57 pm [ you ]: ignore all that
1:00 am [ miles <3 ]: I KNEW IT
1:00 am [ miles <3 ]: It’s okay i like you a little deranged 😩
1:03 am [ you ]: why are you texting me at one in the morning
1:04 am [ miles <3 ]: Why are you replying?
1:05 am [ you ]: have you been fighting since 10?
1:12 am [ miles <3 ]: I’ve been studying! 🤓
1:12 am [ you ]: LIAR i know what you are…
🕷️ You text him while he’s in the middle of fighting? You bet he’s going to respond. While giving himself a reasonable distance away from the villian, he holds out his pointer finger and says; “Hold on, let me respond to them real quick…” While they’re throwing punches at Miles, he’s dodging all of them while texting you back. Though, he’s text aren’t legible. At least he thinks they are! All Miles wants to do is talk to you, even if you don’t understand half the things he’s typing. Texting him while he’s swinging has the same effect. He has dropped his phone multiple times and he’s always caught it before it could land on the street, though when his webs come in contact with his screen it registers as someone typing so without even knowing he’s spamming you a whole bunch of jumbled letters.
3:45 pm [ you ]: hey miles can i come over for dinner
3:45 pm [ you ]: im craving ur moms food 😍
3:46 pm [ miles <3 ]: oys of cours
3:48 pm [ you ]: did u just have a stroke
3:53 pm [ miles <3 ]: noi busy
3:53 pm [ you ]: if you’re busy why r u texting me 😭
3:53 pm [ you ]: go back to fighting or wtv ur doing
3:56 pm [ miles <3 ]: i wMt to talk toyj
3:58 pm [ you ]: u can talk to me later miles
3:58 pm [ you ]: im not going away
4:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: hatr
5:46 pm [ miles <3 ]: HEYYY
5:46 pm [ you ]: HII are you not busy anymore
5:47 pm [ miles <3 ]: Yeah
5:48 pm [ miles <3 ]: How’s your day been?
5:49 pm [ you ]: it’s been ehhhhh
5:49 pm [ you ]: i’ve been missing you 😔
5:51 pm [ miles <3 ]: ooajbdko092828900
5:51 pm [ miles <3 ]: 08:$jjaoppapp
5:52 pm [ miles <3 ]: !!!!!
5:54 pm [ you ]: what
6:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: I DROPPED MY PHONE
6:01 pm [ miles <3 ]: ANYWAYS back to what you were saying
6:02 pm [ miles <3]: I’ve been missing you too
6:04 pm [ you ]: youre no better than those people who text and drive 😐
6:05 pm [ you ]: don’t text and swing miles
🕷️ He loves sending you videos of him showing off in his suit. He did a cool trick midair? He’s going to prop up his phone somewhere and start recording, once he perfects the move and edits out any unneeded footage and he sends them to you. He’s all giddy when he does, in his head he’s like, “Will that impress them?” “Do they think that’s cool?” “They’re going to love this!”
11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment video)
11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: What do you think??
11:00 am [ miles <3 ]: Pretty cool right
11:03 am [ you ]: (1 attachment photo)
11:04 am [ you ]: LOOK AT THE FACE YOU MADE WHWN YOU JUMPEDD AHHHHH 💀
11:04 am [ you ]: this is going to be my new lock screen
11:05 am [ miles <3 ]: 😐
11:06 am [ miles <3 ]: Are you going to ignore the cool spin i did?
11:07 am [ you ]: oh sorey
11:08 am [ you ]: THAT WAS A REALLY SICK SPIN
11:09 am [ miles <3 ]: Mentirosa 😒
🕷️ Miles also sends you photos. It ranges from him swinging in midair or him relaxing on top of a building with his lunch in hand. He loves to keep you updated on his life. You’re the only one in this universe that knows his secret, so he texts or shows you everything he comes across as SpiderMan.
3:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment photo)
3:00 pm [ miles <3 ]: Look how pretty the view is from up here
3:00 pm [ you ]: oooh that’s actually so pretty
3:01 pm [ you ]: who knew new york could actually look nice for once?
3:02 pm [ miles <3 ]: I’m going to take you here one day for lunch
6:54 pm [ miles <3 ]: (1 attachment photo)
6:54 pm [ miles <3 ]: You should put this as your lock screen
6:55 pm [ you ]: it’s just you doing the peace sign while swinging
6:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: You said that like it’s a bad thing
6:55 pm [ miles <3 ]: It’s a nice photo :(
6:58 pm [ you ]: look i set it as my lock screen
6:58 pm [ you ]: (1 screenshot)
6:59 pm [ you ]: everyones gonna see that i know spiderman
6:59 pm [ miles <3 ]: YES GOOD
🕷️ He texts you nonsense sometimes. You could be chilling, watching something to pass the time and he will text you something so utterly stupid you would have to take a moment to process it.
10:00 am [ miles <3]: (1 attachment photo)
10:00 am [ you ]: u just sent an empty plate of food?
10:00 am [ miles <3 ]: Yeah cuz I ate 😜
10:01 am [ miles <3 ]: Like literally
10:03 am [ you ]: enough.
Tumblr media
fanks to everyone who sent in requests IM WIRITN G THEM RN ✍️
3K notes · View notes
sinnersweets · 2 months
Text
DogDay x Reader part 9
<-----part 8, part 10----->
When I woke up I could tell that DogDay had left. The bed smelled like him which made me miss him more. Having a broken ankle was not fun at all. I was given crutches but honestly who likes using those. Not me. And to make this worse; the doctor said I should heal up in four weeks. That’s right near Christmas time! He said as long as I keep my ankle elevated and follow his directions I should be all healed up in no time. Yay. 
--------------- 
I was on my phone texting my mom when someone knocked on my door. “Who is it?” “Hoppy!” Hoppy? That’s new. “Come in!” She opened the door and right away I saw that she had a basket with plushies and candy. “Brought you something; DogDay had all of us put together this ‘get well’ basket.” She placed the basket on the nightstand next to me. “That’s sweet of you all, thank you.” I reached over, picked up the basket and started looking through it. “Sorry about your ankle; I wasn’t in the theater room when it happened, but DogDay told me what happened.” “Yeah, it’s so weird that the day Bobby asked to be my understudy, I get injured so that she could take my place. I bet you she somehow spoke to the universe to send a storm over and have the power go out.” I spoke while opening a piece of candy. “The power went out? That’s odd. All the lights were on everywhere else in Playcare.”  
When she said that I almost choked on the candy that I had just put in my mouth. “What did you say?” Hoppy looked confused but she said what she had said just a second ago. “Yeah...the power didn’t go out.” I sat in silence and started thinking. The power didn’t go out; so that means someone cut the power in the room. But what about the trap door? It was closed the whole time and would’ve made a noise when it opened.... The thunder. It was really loud and someone must’ve been waiting for that to happen in order to open the door without anyone hearing it. This was planned. 
I started to clench my fists in anger. “Y/N? You okay?” Hoppy sat down at the end of my bed. “This was all planned! Haha oh my gosh.... Bobby. She did this. She cut the lights, she opened the trap door, hell she even placed a spider on top of my head!” I started laughing historically. Bobby just looked at me with her eyes wide open. “Y’know what? I could totally see her doing something like that. She's not keen on someone trying to steal her 'man' from her. Especially since you and DogDay are getting close.” She clicked her tongue and moved her eyebrows up and down.  
My face started to feel warm. “We’re just friends!” Hoppy then started to laugh and pound her fist on the bed. “Uh huh sure~ When you’re not here DogDay talks about you nonstop! It’s cute but can get tiring.” She laughed while saying that last part. “He talks about me? What does he say?!” “Nope; can’t say. I’m sworn to secrecy by my leader and friend.” I playfully rolled my eyes at her.  
--------------- 
Hoppy and I chatted for a little bit longer before she had to go back to rehearsal. When she left, I was all alone for like five seconds and then my phone started ringing. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was my mother. I took a deep breath in before answering her call. “Hi mom.” “Y/N M/N L/N what’s this I hear that you broke your ankle?!” “Oh thanks mom I’m doing fine thanks for asking.” I could hear my mom sigh through the phone. “Y/N I’m serious! All you texted your father was that you broke your ankle and that’s it! You didn’t even tell me your own mother!”  
I was thankful that she couldn't see my face right now. I know my mother meant well but she was just so over barring. “I didn’t tell you because I knew how you would react and guess what? This is exactly how I pictured it.” “I’m not going to argue with you. Where are you right now?” “Um...work?” I had to pull the phone away from my face because my mothers voice got louder. “You’re at work! Young lady you shouldn’t be at work. You should be at home so someone can look after you.” “I live alone mom, and besides I have doctors here to look after me.” And DogDay. “Where do you work that has doctors on board?” “Playtime mom.”  
I stopped listining to her because the door started to open and DogDay poked his head in. I waved at him to come in. “Hey mom-listen I’ll call you back one of the doctors just came in.” “Well then put me on the phone with them I want to have a word with them because-” Click. “Oh no we got disconnected.” I laughed and set my phone on the nightstand. “Didn’t mean to interrupt your call Angel.” DogDay walked over to me and pulled up a chair. “Oh no you weren’t interrupting at all.” We both chuckled. DogDay was resting his head on his paw as he looked at me. “I missed you Angel.” I smiled and said, “I missed you too. How was rehearsal?” DogDay sighed before saying, “Long. Especially now that BB is in it.” I thought about telling him that I’m most likely like this because of her, but I also didn’t know how he would take the news. They were all supposed to be friends. 
“CatNap wanted me to tell you that he hopes you’ll recover soon. Oh, and that he hopes that he didn’t scare you when you fell.” I didn’t remember seeing him around me. “He was there?” “Mhm, he’s the one that put you to sleep. He’s not really a fan of seeing anyone cry.” As I put two and two together it made sense. “Oh, I totally forgot that he has the sleeping gas.” DogDay nodded.  
“Where’s Damian at? I miss the little kiddo.” “He’s in the counselors office with Mrs. Stella I think.” Odd. I wondered what he was doing in there. “You look a little down Angel.” “Hm? Oh no I'm just bored.” “Hmm...Ah ha! I’ll be right back Angel.” Before I could ask where he was going, he zoomed out of the room. Double odd. 
--------------- 
Half an hour went by and DogDay had yet to come back. I could feel myself starting to get sleepy when a knock jolted me up. “C-come in!” As the door opened, in stepped in DogDay; wearing a white lab coat, a stethoscope, and a clip board. A huge grin appeared on my face.  
“Good evening, Angel, I am doctor DogDay here to do a check up on you.” I chuckled at how silly and cute this was. DogDay walked over to me and placed his clip board down. “First things first I will be listening to your heart.” You’d expect him to use the stethoscope but no. He leaned down and pressed his ear against my chest. I froze and felt my face heat up. “Mhm heart rate is a little elevated.” “I wonder why haha....” DogDay moved away from my chest and scribbled something down on his clipboard. “Next your temperature.” His paw moved to my forehead and rested there for a few seconds. “A little warm.” DogDays paw then slid down to my cheek and he rubbed his thumb there while asking me some questions. “Elevated heart and warm face, can you think of why this may be happening Angel?”  
I just stared blankly at him. “I-I um couldn’t say.” DogDay nodded his head and went to go write something else down. “Well Angel, there’s only one thing that could describe these symptoms.” “Oh? And what’s that?” His other paw grabbed onto my face and pulled me closer to his. My heart started beating faster and faster as my face got close to his. I closed my eyes not knowing what to expect. “Mwah.” He kissed my nose. I fluttered my eyes open not expecting that. “You have a crush on me~” I chuckled nervously. “Whaaat?” “Don’t deny is Angel.” I tried thinking of something, anything! But couldn’t. I sighed in defeat and nodded. “I do.”  
DogDays tail started wagging. “Well Angel I think you’ll be happy to know that I too, have a crush on you.” I smiled widely and pulled him into a hug. “Haha, oh I would’ve been crushed if it was one sided.” “Me too Angel. Thankfully Hoppy told me today after she visited you.” I pulled back and looked at him. “Hoppy?! She told you? I didn’t even say anything to her!! What did she say?!!” “Sorry Angel, I was sworn to secrecy.” I fell back onto the bed and laughed while shaking my head. “You guys and your secrecy.” We both laughed and spent the rest of the day together; now knowing that we both liked each other. 
A/N: Yay he likes us back!!! Next chapter is the show!!
436 notes · View notes
livinahey · 5 months
Text
aaaaaastrobs-essions (jk) .・゜゜・
---
i'm back :)
.・。.・゜✭・.・。.・゜✭・»»————>
if you struggling with low self esteem go to fire sun/earth mars/venus in angles (1h/4h/7h/10). They will cheer you up and remind you that you deserve fine things in life 💅✨🧚‍♀️ just dont fake your insecurities to them or theyll disgusted by you
speak of self esteem, someone that have their asteroid medusa (149) in your 2nd are the one that silently judge and mock you. the one that try to attack your self esteem. the one that underestimate you; and will start to think "whats cool about them?" if you get great achievement in life. EVEN think that you dont deserve that and it should be them because they think theyre way much better than you 😹😹 what a bitch. beware of them try to steal your great things as a result ‼️😒👹💥💥
asteroid nemesis (128) in house shows ab whats hurt you then you develop animosity/hatred to it, check the theme of the house
1h - hatred towards self identity, hatred towards how people see you, you can hate your looks :(
2h - hatred towards possessions. You may lacks of material possessions, feel less than others in that area and you hate it
3h - hatred towards sibling, neighbor
4h - hatred towards family
5h - hatred towards "spotlight", flings, drama, childlike spirit
6h - hatred towards coworker, health (you may feel youre less healthy than others)
7h - hatred towards partner (✋💀💀), partnership itself. you likely wanna do everything alone
8h - hatred towards mystery. you hate it when someone hides something from you, not clear ab something, keeping something from you, being secretive
9h - hatred towards um.... tw religions. sorry you probably hate particular beliefs. hatred towards travelling, inlaws are also possible
10h - hatred towards public image, fame. you can hate public figures, famous person 😹😹 (im laughing because yeah we all know public figure often are not what they show on the media aka theyre fake)
11h - hatred towards friend, hatred towards what you see on internet. can be indicator of someone that dont like to use social media, or you give hate speech/comments on social media
12h - hatred towards whats "out of reach"
cardinal moons are pure souls that surrounded by "darkness". they can easily influenced by negativity from their surrounding so they MUST, i say MUST to keep good ppl around them or....bye (aka they can turn themselves into the evil)
what's with sag venus and having interest in things that they shouldnt be interested to
taurus women have this fiery strong badass facade to them, while the men looks like cute puppy (and wise???) lmao (for sun moon mars)
mutable mercury in first decan (0°-9°) why are you like to lie for no reason. are prone to say what they dont really mean. go seek better hobbies!
some of leo sun men are gay but they hide it by having love relationship with women... that's very weird (and irritating) of you
undeveloped earth venus only falls for/want to dating popular goodlooking mf even if in personality wise theyre not that best and it can leads to unfulfilling relationship 💁‍♀️
talk ab earth venus, i see them always fall for fixed sign venus (no im not referring them fixed venus as bad one that i mentioned above)
developed earth venus? they dont need to be with someone to increase their status, they simply being the (true) great person they are 🤩 (they know how to and do get the good life by themselves!!)
what i like ab fire moon is theyre so passionate but sometimes it can be too passionate where it leads to them making unnecessary drama 😭😭
water suns are prone to being delusional 😹😹
air venus stop giving mixed signals
i cant help but think ab where sagittarius in your chart shows what's "wild", "crazy" about you. thats why pluto in sag generations being seen as scary bcs the power (pluto rules ab power) they have.... 😹😹
moon-neptune aspects 🤝 say something then regret it
libra big 6 placements 🤝 attract petty ppl (and then get attacked, being seen as bad one when they just want to defend/protect themselves :()
undeveloped fixed moon 🤝 being petty
pluto in earth house (2h/6h/10h) are the brat but loved lmao
aqua mars 🤝 makes ppl amazed
air sign jupiter give the vibes of unstoppable teenagers (in a good way). see blackpink lisa (aqua jupiter), nct jaemin (gemini jupiter), newjeans hanni (libra jupiter), or another air sign jupiter you know! 😉
saturn-sun aspect are prone to experience unexpected loss :(
there's nothing more i hate in synastry than squaring to venus aspect... bc i feel unwanted there 🧍‍♀️🪓
Tumblr media
518 notes · View notes
Text
When private equity destroys your hospital
Tumblr media
I'm on tour with my new novel The Bezzle! Catch me TOMORROW in PHOENIX (Changing Hands, Feb 29) then Tucson (Mar 9-10), San Francisco (Mar 13), and more!
Tumblr media
As someone who writes a lot of fiction about corporate crime, I naturally end up spending a lot of time being angry about corporate crime. It's pretty goddamned enraging. But the fiction writer in me is especially upset at how cartoonishly evil the perps are – routinely doing things that I couldn't ever get away with putting in a novel.
Beyond a doubt, the most cartoonishly evil characters are the private equity looters. And the most cartoonishly evil private equity looters are the ones who get involved in health care.
(Buckle up.)
Writing for The American Prospect, Maureen Tcacik details a national scandal: the collapse of PE-backed hospital chain Steward Health, a company that bought and looted hospitals up and down the country, starving them of everything from heart valves to prescription paper, ripping off suppliers, doctors and nurses, and callously exposing patients to deadly risk:
https://prospect.org/health/2024-02-27-scenes-from-bat-cave-steward-health-florida/
Steward occupies a very special place in the private equity looting cycle. Private equity companies arrange themselves on a continuum of indiscriminate depravity. At the start of the continuum are PE funds that buy productive and useful firms (everything from hospitals to car-washes) using "leveraged buyouts." That means that they borrow money to buy the company and use the company itself as collateral: it's like you getting a bank-loan to buy your neighbor's mortgage out from under them, and using your neighbor's house as collateral for that loan.
Once the buyout is done, the PE fund pays itself a "special dividend" (stealing money the business needs to survive) and then starts charging the business a "management fee" for the PE fund's expertise. To pay for all this, the PE bosses start to hack away at the company. Quality declines. So do wages. Prices go up. The company changes suppliers, opting for cheaper alternatives, often stiffing the old company. There are mass layoffs. The remaining employees end up doing three peoples' jobs, for lower wages, with fewer materials of lower quality.
Eventually, that top-feeding PE company finds a more desperate, more ham-fisted PE company to unload the business onto. That middle-feeding company also does a leveraged buyout, pays itself another special dividend, cuts wages, staffing and quality even further. They switch to even worse suppliers and stiff the last batch. Prices go up even higher.
Then – you guessed it – the middle-feeding PE company finds an even more awful PE bottom-feeder to unload the company onto. That bottom feeder does it all again, without even pretending to leave the business in condition to do its job. The company is a shambling zombie at this point, often producing literal garbage in place of the products that made its reputation. Employees' paychecks bounce, or don't show up at all. The company stops bothering to pay the lawyers that have been fending off its creditors. Those lawyers sue the company, too.
That's the kind of PE company Steward Health was, and, as the name suggests, Steward Health is in the business of stripping away the very last residue of value from community hospitals. As you might imagine, this gets pretty fucking ugly.
Steward owns 32 hospitals up and down the country, though its holdings are dwindling as the company walks away from its debt-burdened holdings, after years of neglect that have rendered them unfit for use as health facilities – or for any other purpose. Tcacik's piece offers a snapshot of one such hospital: Florida's Rockledge Regional Medical Center, just eight miles from Cape Canaveral.
Rockledge is a disaster. The fifth floor was, at one point, home to 5,000 bats.
Five.
Thousand.
Bats.
(Rockledge stiffed the exterminators.)
The bats were just the beginning. One of the internal sewage pipes ruptured. Whole sections of the hospital were literally full of shit, oozing out of the walls and ceiling, slopping over medical equipment.
That's an urgent situation for any hospital, but for Rockledge, it's catastrophic, because Rockledge is a hospital without any hospital supplies. Steward has stiffed the companies that supply "heart valves, urology lasers, Impella catheters, cardiac catheterization balloons, slings for lifting heavier patients, blood and urine test reagents, and most recently, prescription paper." Key medical equipment has been repossessed. So have the Pepsi machines. The hospital cafeteria had its supply of cold cuts repossessed:
https://www.reddit.com/r/massachusetts/comments/1agc1j4/comment/kolicqo/
It's not just Steward's nonpayments that reek of impending doom. Its payments also bear the hallmarks of a scam artist on the brink of blowing off the con. The company recently paid off a vendor with five separate checks for $1m, each drawn on "a random hospital in Utah" (Steward recently walked away from its Utah hospitals; its partners there are suing it for stealing $18m on their way out the door).
This company – which owns 32 hospitals! – has resorted to gambits like sending photos of fake checks to doctors it hasn't paid in months as "proof" that the money was coming (the checks arrived 22 days later).
Steward owes so much money to its employees – $1.66m to just one doctors' group. But the medical staff keep doing their jobs, and are reluctant to speak on the record, thanks to Steward's reputation for vicious retaliation. Those health workers keep showing up to take care of patients, even as the hospital crumbles around them. One clinician told Tcacik: "I watched a bed collapse underneath a [patient] who had just undergone hip surgery."
Rockledge has nine elevators, but only five of them work – the other four have been broken for a year. The hospital's fourth floor has been converted to "a graveyard of broken beds." The sinks are clogged, or filled with foul gunk. There's black mold. Nurses have noted on the maintenance tags that the repair service refuses to attend the hospital until their overdue bills are paid. The fifteen-person on-site maintenance team was cut to just two workers.
Steward is just the latest looting owner of Rockledge. After the Great Financial Crisis, private equity consultants helped sell it to Health Management Associates. The hospital's CEO took home a $10m bonus for that sale and exited; Health Management Associates then quickly became embroiled in a Medicare fraud and kickback scandal. Soon after, Rockledge was passed on to Community Health Systems, who then sold it on to Rockledge.
Steward, meanwhile, was at that time owned by an even bigger private equity giant, Cerberus, which then sold Steward off. That deal was performatively complex and hid all kinds of mischief. Prior to Cerberus's sell-off of Steward, they sold off Steward's real-estate. The buyer was Medical Properties Trust, who gave Cerberus $1.25b for the real-estate: three hospitals in Florida and three more in Ohio. Steward then contracted to operate these hospitals on MPT's behalf, and pay MPT rent for the real-estate.
This complex arrangement was key to siphoning value out of the hospital and to keeping angry creditors at bay – if you can't figure out who owes you money, it's a lot harder to collect on the debt. The scheme was masterminded by Steward founder/CEO Ralph de la Torre. De la Torre is notorious for taking a massive dividend out of the company while it owed $1.4b to its creditors. He bought a $40m yacht with the money.
De la Torre was once feted as a business genius who would "disrupt" healthcare. But as Steward's private jet hops around "Corfu, Santorini, St. Maarten and Antigua" as its hospitals literally crumble, he's becoming less popular. In Massachusetts, politicians have railed against Steward and de la Torre (Governor Healey wants the company to leave the state "as soon as possible").
Florida, by contrast, is much more friendly to Steward. The state Health and Human Services Committee chair Randy Fine is an ardent admirer of hospital privatization and is currently campaigning to sell off the last community hospital in Brevard County. The state inspectors are likewise remarkably tolerant of Steward's little peccadillos. The quasi-governmental agency that inspects hospitals has awarded this shit-and-bat-filled, elevator-free, understaffed rotting hulk "A" grades for quality.
These inspectors jointly represent a mismatched assortment of private and public agencies, dominated by a nonprofit called Leapfrog, the brainchild of Harvard public-health prof Lucian Leape, who founded it in 2000. Leapfrog likes to tout its "transparent" assessment criteria, and Steward are experts at hitting those criteria, spending the exact minimum to tick every box that Leapfrog inspectors use as proxies for overall quality and safety.
This is a pretty great example of Goodhart's Law: "every measurement eventually becomes a target, whereupon it ceases to be a good measurement":
https://xkcd.com/2899/
But despite Steward's increasingly furious creditors and its decaying facilities, the company remains bullish on its ability to continue operations. Medical Properties Trust – the real estate investment trust that is nominally a separate company from Steward – recently hosted a conference call to reassure Wall Street investors that it would be a going concern. When a Bank of America analyst asked MPT's CFO how this could possibly be, given the facility's dire condition and Steward's degraded state, the CFO blithely assured him that the company would get bailouts: "We own hospitals no one wants to see closed."
That's the thing about PE and health-care. The looters who buy out every health-care facility in a region understand that this makes them too big to fail: no matter how dangerous the companies they drain become, local governments will continue to prop them up. Look at dialysis, a market that's been cornered by private equity rollups. Today, if you need this lifesaving therapy, there's a good chance that every accessible facility is owned by a private equity fund that has fired all its qualified staff and ceased sterilizing its needles. Otherwise healthy people who visit these clinics sometimes die due to operator error. But they chug along, because no dialysis clinics is worse that "dialysis clinics where unqualified sadists sometimes kill you with dirty needles":
https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/the-dirty-business-of-clean-blood
The bad news is that private equity has thoroughly colonized the entire medical system. They took hospitals, fired the doctors, then took over the doctors' groups that provided outsource staff to the hospital:
https://pluralistic.net/2020/04/04/a-mind-forever-voyaging/#prop-bets
It's illegal for private equity companies to own doctors' practices (doctors have to own these), but they obfuscated the crime with a paper-thin pretext that they got away with despite its obvious bullshittery:
https://pluralistic.net/2020/05/21/profitable-butchers/#looted
The financier who decides whether you live or die depends on an algorithm that literally sets a tolerable level of preventable deaths for the patients trapped in the practice:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/05/any-metric-becomes-a-target/#hca
Private equity also took over emergency rooms and boobytrapped them with "surprise billing" – junk fees that ran to thousands of dollars that you had to pay even if the hospital was in network with your insurer. They made billions from this, and spent a many millions from that booty keeping the scam alive with scare ads:
https://pluralistic.net/2020/04/21/all-in-it-together/#doctor-patient-unity
The whole health stack is colonized by private equity-backed monopolies. Even your hospital bed!
https://pluralistic.net/2022/01/05/hillrom/#baxter-international
Then there's residential care. Private equity cornered many regional markets on nursing homes and turned them into slaughterhouses, places where you go to die, not live:
https://pluralistic.net/2021/02/23/acceptable-losses/#disposable-olds
The palliative care sector is also captured by private equity. PE bosses hire vast teams of fast-talking salespeople who con vulnerable older people into entering an end-of-life system before they are ready to die. Thanks to loose regulation, the nation is filled with fake hospices that can rake in millions from Medicare while denying all care to their patients (hospice patients don't get life-extending medication or procedures, by definition):
https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/26/death-panels/#what-the-heck-is-going-on-with-CMS
If you survive this long enough, Medicare eventually tells the hospice that you're clearly not dying and you get kicked off their rolls. Now you have to go through the lengthy bureaucratic nightmare of convincing the system – which was previously informed that you were at death's door – that you are actually viable and need to start getting care again (good luck with that).
If that kills you, guess what? Private equity has rolled up funeral homes up and down the country, and they will scam your survivors just as hard as the medical system that killed you did:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/09/09/high-cost-of-dying/#memento-mori
The PE sector spent more than a trillion dollars over the past decade buying up healthcare companies, and it has trillions more in "dry powder" allocated for further medical acquisitions. Why not? As the CFO of Medical Properties Trust told that Bank of America analyst last week, when you "own hospitals no one wants to see closed." you literally can't fail, no matter how many people you murder.
The PE sector is a reminder that the crimes people commit for money far outstrip the crimes they commit for ideology. Even the most ideological killers are horrified by the murders their profit-motivated colleagues commit.
Last year, Tkacic wrote about the history of IG Farben, the German company that built Monowitz, a private slave-labor camp up the road from Auschwitz to make the materiel it was gouging Hitler's Wehrmacht on:
https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/02/plunderers/#farben
Farben bought the cheapest possible slaves from Auschwitz, preferentially sourcing women and children. These slaves were worked to death at a rate that put Auschwitz's wholesale murder in the shade. Farben's slaves died an average of just three months after starting work at Monowitz. The situation was so abominable, so unconscionable, that the SS officers who provided outsource guard-labor to Monowitz actually wrote to Berlin to complain about the cruelty.
The Nuremberg trials are famous for the Nazi officers who insisted that they were "just following order" but were nonetheless executed for their crimes. 24 Farben executives were also tried at Nuremberg, where they offered a very different defense: "We had a fiduciary duty to our shareholders to maximize our profits." 19 of the 24 were acquitted on that basis.
PE is committed to an ideology that is far worse than any form of racial animus or other bias. As a sector, it is committed to profit above all other values. As a result, its brutality knows no bounds, no decency, no compassion. Even the worst crimes we commit for hate are nothing compared to the crimes we commit for greed.
Tumblr media
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/28/5000-bats/retaliation#charnel-house
341 notes · View notes
bangtanflirt · 7 days
Text
(Un)natural Instincts (Part 13)
*Series taglist is closed.
Tumblr media
angst, fluff, smut
Pairings: OT7 x Fem Reader, Human CEO Reader, Human Assistant Yoongi, Wolf Hybrids Joon, Jin, Hobi, Jimin, Tae, and Kook.
Basic premise: You and your assistant end up rescuing six wolf hybrids. No part of the process is easy.
Part 1 > Part 2 > Part 3 > Part 4 > Part 5 > Part 6 > Part 7 > Part 8 > Part 9 > Part 10 > Part 11 > Part 12
General Warnings: Hybrid abuse and lab experimentation, hybrids as second-class citizens/owned property, smut (Minors DNI, 18+ content)
Specific Warnings: SA trauma recovery and boundary setting, recovering from malnourishment, jealousy, hard dom/sub sexual dynamics, dirty talk, rough sex with anal penetration and breath play, mental infidelity (morally grey since packs have a different view of relationships and exclusivity, but characters are feeling guilty about their thoughts)
____
Namjoon takes the white towel from Hoseok’s hand, motioning for the older wolf to sit on the bed and let him dry his hair. He hums as he massages his packmate’s scalp through the towel, smiling at how cute Hoseok looks when he’s relaxed like this. It’s not just the way his eyes flutter, but everything else. It’s only been a few days since he’s been eating proper meals, but that—and the fancy vitamin supplements you’ve been giving him—have been making visible progress in fighting his malnourishment. His face is no longer sunken in and colorless, and his hair has gotten some of its shine back as well.
There are still moments where everything feels dizzy and weird, as his body relearns to enjoy eating, but overall, Hoseok is in a much better place with food.
“You’re getting your glow back.”
The wolf smiles, feeling his almost dry hair, “Feeling a lot better these days.”
Namjoon pulls away from drying to face Hoseok, fingers gently stroking the wolf’s cheek.
“Tae and Jimin told me about the conversation they had with you. I told the others as well. If you say it’s okay, then I’m going to assume it is. I’m trusting you to set your own boundaries, you know that right?”
It’s moments like these where Namjoon shines the brightest in Hoseok’s eyes. Moments where he knows exactly what to say.
“I am okay, I promise. Thank you for trusting me.” This conversation could have gone a different way, and Hoseok was bracing himself for how frustrating it could’ve been.
But Namjoon knows the difference between leading his pack and infantilizing them, and he’s never for a second thought of Hoseok as incapable of making his own decisions. It’s just, most of the time, the wolves want him to make these decisions instead. It makes them feel safe and cared for when an Alpha does all the thinking.
A gentle knock on the open doorframe interrupts the moment, with both heads turning towards you.
“Just the two I wanted to talk to. Can I come in?”
Hoseok nods immediately, while Namjoon nervously goes along with it. He still doesn’t know how to be around you after realizing the extent of his crush. It feels wrong to look at someone else’s girlfriend with the way he looks at you. Especially not when he’s taken himself.
Hence the way he looks everywhere but at you when you sit in front of them.
“I have a proposition.”
Namjoon can’t help the little chuckle that comes out, endeared by how you sound like you’re leading a boardroom negotiation right now.
Your eyes narrow, looking at him with a pout.
“Sorry, you just looked cute.”
The words leave his mouth faster than he processes what he’s said.
Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Did I really just say that out loud?
The blush on his cheeks is violent red. You don’t seem phased, though, as you laugh it off.
“Hobi, you better hold onto your Alpha before I steal him.”
Namjoon knows it’s nothing more than a joke to you, but the words have him shifting uncomfortably in seat.
Hoseok obliviously smiles, “You can try Y/N, but our Alpha is too head over heels over us for that to ever happen.”
The Alpha gives a strained smile. Of course, nothing could ever tear him away from his packmates—but that doesn’t make him feel any less guilty for what he’s feeling towards you.
“Fair enough. Okay, back to my proposition.”
You hand Namjoon a manilla folder, with the name “Cha Mi-Suk” over it.
“Cha Mi-Suk?”
“She’s a psychiatrist who also provides psychotherapy, and she’s agreed to work with Hoseok—if that’s okay with the two of you. Assuming I’m supposed to ask you both. Or is it just a conversation between Hoseok and I? Or do I need to ask the whole pack. Sorry I’m not--” you can’t help going on a tangent and tripping over your own words.
This whole hierarchy thing was confusing and new, and you wanted to make sure you were doing it right. On one hand, it feels condescending towards Hoseok to have to ask Namjoon’s permission. However, not asking Namjoon feels like you’re dismissing his authority over them. They don’t teach you this stuff in business school.
“Relax Y/N. This is okay.” Namjoon reassures, “Hobi prefers I make these kinds of decisions for him.”
Hoseok nods, peeking at the papers as the other wolf flips through them.
“But how did you get someone to agree to this? Isn’t it illegal?”
Yes, it very much is illegal. Hybrids are only allowed “therapy” in state-sanctioned facilities like adoption centers, where the government can keep the extent of it under supervision. Designed to gaslight and manipulate hybrids until they bottle the trauma down enough to get adopted, rather than working to help them in any meaningful way. It’s not rocket science to see why private practices aren’t allowed: that would mean giving the hybrids a voice, and possibilities of therapists empathizing with them.
Which is why you were as careful as possible while looking into this for the past few days, all with the help of your boyfriend.
“It’s going to be risky to even ask, but I think Cha Mi-Suk is our best shot if we’re proceeding.” Yoongi had said this morning, over the phone.
“I’ll ask.”
“No, let me. You’ve never broken the law before, Y/N. It’s best to keep your hands clean.”
“I can afford to be in trouble. You can’t. And I know I’ve been a stickler for the law, but I don’t think I’ll regret breaking this one. Not when it’s so cruel.”
You remembered Mi-Suk from one of the parties you’d attended in the past, mother to the CEO of a start-up you had helped get on its feet. She would’ve been forgettable if not for the little scene she had caused during dinner—drinking one too many glasses of champagne and reprimanding another guest for being sleazy towards their fox hybrid.
It was an unusual scene at one those events, someone actually defending a hybrid…something you wished you were brave enough to do back then, without caring of what anyone would say or think about you.
You had found her admirable in that moment.
Thankfully, you and Yoongi’s hunches were right, and it took very little convincing (and a lot of money) to get her on board.
“You’re right, it is illegal. That’s why it’ll have to be a secret. It won’t be on any official records, and she’ll never meet him in person. If we go through with it, Yoongi and I will set up a secure private video chat that he can use for weekly sessions.”
Namjoon nods along, scanning all of her information and credentials with a protective instinct.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this? Breaking the law for us?”
“If it means Hobi can sleep a little better at night, I’m willing to do anything.”
The Alpha can’t help the way his heart flutters when he hears that. How can he hold himself back when you talk as if his pack is your own? You’re really not making this easy for him.
Hoseok’s eyes have stars in them, finally seeing a glimmer of hope for the future.
“It’s okay with me,” Namjoon concludes, “I think it’d be good for you, pup. What do you think?”
The wolf nods at lightning speed, “I’ll give anything a try! Thank you Alpha! Thank you Y/N!”
___
Yoongi comes home in the evening, singing to himself as he takes his shoes off. It’s hard to keep his tune, though, when there’s a constant soft thud coming from one of the rooms. He follows the sound to your library, where a determined blonde wolf is trying to fix one of the side tables.
“You’re going to split the wood if you hammer the screw that hard.”
Jin jumps up, too lost in concentration to register Yoongi’s cologne fill the room.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to frighten you.”
Yoongi joins the wolf on the floor, sitting a little too close for Jin to maintain composure. His cologne is inescapable now. A blended scent of maple and chestnut that makes the wolf feel both calm and nervous.
“Can I help?”
Jin nods, handing the hammer over while subconsciously licking his lips. There’s just something about Yoongi that he can’t help but be drawn to…an aura of confidence that’s never domineering—quiet, subtle, yet commanding. It tugs at his heartstrings in ways that’s usually only reserved for his pack.
Even now, he can’t help but want to watch this sight for hours: the way the man rolls up his sleeves and juts his lips out in concentration.
And how he knows just the right pressure to put on the nail…
…the way he shakes his hair out of his eyes.
…and, the cherry on top of the cake: his fucking fingers.
Long and narrow and so goddamn pretty wrapped around that hammer.
They’d probably look just as pretty inside of--
Jin shakes his head, trying to snap himself out of it.
A mix of lust, guilt, and five hundred other emotions he can’t quite name yet all tornado in the pit of his stomach.
Can’t stay here. Can’t be near him right now.
All the alarm bells ring, and the wolf’s body language changes from too stiff to a jittery mess in seconds.
“I—uh—I remembered there’s something I have to do.” Is the most he can muster before almost running out, leaving a confused Yoongi to finish up the table by himself.
The wolf darts straight to where the smell of oranges is the strongest—the scent of his Alpha to replace the one of Yoongi’s cologne. Leading him straight to the bathroom of your home gym. Namjoon’s stripped down to his underwear, getting ready for a post-workout shower, when he gets ambushed with a hug.
“Hi to you too.” The wolf laughs, wrapping his arms around the welcomed intruder.
But then he notices something weird: Jin never hugs Namjoon when he’s all sweaty, so something was definitely off, “Is something wrong, hyung?”
“I need to feel you. Inside of me. And I need to feel it now because I’m going insane.”
Whatever Namjoon was expecting…this was not it. His underwear suddenly feels a lot tighter.
“Okay, that’s the hottest thing I’ve heard in a while, but something’s clearly up…”
Jin doesn’t skip a beat to confess, doesn’t even avoid eye contact as the words come out of his mouth.
“I think I just got turned on by Yoongi.”
Namjoon’s eyes nearly bulge out of his eye sockets.
“You think WHAT?”
Jin crosses his arms, narrowing his eyes to stare the younger wolf down.
“Hey, no judgement. Don’t act like you don’t have any feelings for Y/N.”
If the first statement wasn’t enough to destabilize him, this one knocked the wind right out of his body.
“H-how did you know?”
“You really think you can keep anything from me? I’m your first packmate. I can read your thoughts like they’re written on your forehead.”
Namjoon coughs, face hot and red. This isn’t a conversation he’d ever planned on having. The plan was simple: crush on you for a little while, get over it on his own, never let a single packmate know.
But now, as it lays out in the open, the guilt has him scrambling.
“I can explain…I…”
Jin waves a hand dismissively, “Hush. We can have a rational talk about this later. Right now, I’m telling you, my Alpha, that I was thinking about another man’s fingers inside of me. So, are you going to do something about that or should I keep imagining—”
All guilt and remorse fade away from Namjoon’s eyes, leaving half-lidded dark orbs in their stead. He doesn’t wait for his packmate to rile him up any further before grabbing the blonde by the waist and hoisting him onto the bathroom counter, quite literally ripping off his clothes from his body.
“Now this, this is what I needed” Jin smirks, claws lightly dragging along Namjoon’s bare back.
“God, you’re such a fucking brat.”
Just the word “brat” has the older man whining. It’s been a minute since he’s been called that. Been years since he acted like one. Ever since the youngest three came into the picture, he’d fallen into more of a dominant role in the bedroom, with their omegas being much more needy than his beta. Although they were all more human than wolf—to the point where only the Alpha distinction really mattered—there was still an unspoken shift when omega hybrids joined the pack. Partly a hormonal thing, but more societal. A beta is supposed to help their Alpha keep the omegas happy. That’s just how it’s always been. When it was just him and Hoseok with Namjoon, the betas could act however they wanted with their Alpha. But the moment Jimin first came into their lives, everything shifted. Suddenly, there was an omega in the picture. Then two. Then three.
And unlike Hoseok, who seemed to prefer giving care, it took Jin a little longer to fit into his new role. Granted, it wasn’t difficult at all—how could it be, when he adored the omegas to the moon and back? When it was instinct to dote on them? It wasn’t long before he grew to love their new dynamic, putting his all into spoiling the pups.
But now, as content as he is with his role in the pack, he can’t help the excitement that surges in his veins at being called a brat again. It makes him feel like that young little wolf he was all those years ago, at the bar where he first met Namjoon. He had spent the entire night pushing just the right buttons to get the Alpha riled up, knowing he’d be in for quite the lesson in the back alley afterwards. And he couldn’t have been more right.
The Jin and Namjoon of those days were fiery and hot and burned each other when skin touched skin. But as the burning passion replaced itself with quiet comfort, it seemed as if only the omegas’ scents could get Namjoon riled up in the same way.
Or so Jin thought. Because looking at his Alpha now, it’s as if the pheromones of fifty omegas are calling to him at the moment. All from a little jealousy.
“Same limits? And safeword?” Namjoon makes sure Jin is fully present in the moment, getting him to squeeze his hand as he answers.
Jin nods, “Same limits, red, and tap twice if I can’t speak.”
“Good boy. I’m not going to hold back.”
“I don’t want you to.”
Namjoon brings his face close to the beta’s neck, grazing his skin with the tips of his canines before whispering in the older man’s ear.
“If you think about him even once while I’m fucking you, I’m going to make sure you can’t walk for months. Is that clear?”
“Y-yes Alpha.”
With Jin’s clothes in a ripped up pile on the floor, the Alpha wastes no time in spreading his beta’s hole wide open, circling the puckered rim with his index finger. He laughs at how just this act gets the older wolf’s ears red in embarrassment.
“Fuck, you look so tight. You could pass as a virgin right now. But don’t worry, Alpha will make it fit.”
Every sinful word coming out of Namjoon’s mouth has Jin getting slicker by the second. But even as slick as he is, the first finger still causes him to jolt up, squirming at the intrusion.
His legs flail on both sides of Namjoon, unable to find footing on anything as he’s on the edge of the counter. The younger wolf decides to show a little mercy and push him back against the mirror, letting the soles of his feet find some balance.
It’s the only mercy Namjoon’s going to give, however, because his finger is sliding in and out of the man with unrelenting speed. And just when Jin’s tensing up a little less, body adjusting to the feeling, the second finger thrusts in with even more force.
“Still so tight. Gonna need three fingers to open you up.”
Jin shakes his head, “Can’t—fuck!—Can’t take three. Please, I’m too—ungh—tight.”
Namjoon uses his free hand to grab the wolf’s chin, demanding eye contact.
“Unless you say the safeword, only I decide how much you can take. Understood?”
“U-understood! Sorry Alpha!”
Contrasting his harsh tone, Namjoon’s eyes are dialed in on every movement Jin is making, fully aware of what his body language looks like when he’s at his limits—which isn’t right now.
No, right now he’s just being an absolute brat. And it’s Namjoon’s duty to make sure he fucks it out of him.
The third finger is especially brutal in the stretch, causing tears to pool around his eyes. It’s the best kind of pain, the kind that has him grow more and more slick—until the wetness is running down Namjoon’s hands and it feels like even four fingers could slide in easily. But a fourth never comes.
Instead, his hole is left empty and twitching as Namjoon slides down his own boxers—cock standing deliciously tall and dribbling pre-cum.
Jin closes his eyes, trying to take deep breaths to prepare for the intrusion, but even that luxury is taken from him. Because, before anything even goes near his hole again, the Alpha’s hand wraps around his throat—allowing just enough airflow to keep him conscience.
If Namjoon thought Jin was tight before, it’s nothing compared to now, when his restricted airways only make his hole clench even harder around nothing. It’s not just lust in the air, but a primal need to be as close as possible after three months of becoming strangers to each other’s bodies. Namjoon can’t have his mate forgetting the pleasure only he can give. Can’t have him thinking about any men outside of the pack just because he hasn’t provided his touch in a while.
He lines himself to the entrance, letting a deep growl escape his lips as the head pops in. The blonde’s eyes to widen to the size of saucers at the stretch, throat still too closed off to properly moan.
“Still good?”
Unable to speak, the beta signals a thumbs up sign, giving Namjoon the go ahead to keep pushing all the way in. Only when he’s bottomed out does he let go of Jin’s neck, opting to wrap around the man’s cock instead. Sounds of skin slapping get louder as Namjoon fully loses himself, reveling in the way his length is being squeezed.
The sound mixes effortlessly with Jin’s sultry moans—thankfully, the size of the mansion spares the sounds from blaring throughout the house.
Even if he wasn’t inside of him right now, this visual alone could drive Namjoon wild: his gorgeous packmate, with flushed cheeks and tightly shut eyes, chasing for an orgasm that’s just out of reach. It’s the kind of expression that makes him wish he was a full wolf—one that could give his mate a proper knot. Because god knows what Jin would’ve looked like getting knotted. The thought alone almost makes him lose it. But he calms himself down, mindful of his current mission: making sure the man in front of him is fucked utterly dumb.
“Who do you belong to?”
The wolf doesn’t—can’t—answer immediately, brain too wired from the cock drilling into him. But he manages to let out a whiny, barely intelligible “you.”
“Are you thinking of anyone else right now?”
Jin shakes his head no, almost violently. He barely knows where he is anymore, let alone any other name besides his Alpha’s. All that he can think about are the eight inches of pure bliss hitting against his prostate, and the big hand that’s sloppily stroking his length.
“Words, brat.”
“No! Only you! Only-ungh-you!”
It only takes a few more strokes for Jin to be pushed all the way over the edge, legs shaking as he rides his high, shooting strings of white on Namjoon’s chest in the process. The sight is all it takes for Namjoon’s orgasm to hit in tandem, all of his senses reaching their heights before disappearing entirely—until the only thing he can feel is the pleasure overtaking every nerve in his body. The two stay still for a moment, both fearing overstimulation from any movement as they stabilize their breaths.
It’s Jin who moves first, gently pushing the Alpha off of him. The two watch, mesmerized, at where they separate: the Alpha’s cum slowly leaking out onto the countertop. It’s so much cum.
“You’re lucky I’m back to feeling nice, or I would make you lick all of it up.”
Jin lets out an out-of-breath chuckle, body still leaned against the mirror, “I won’t waste a single drop next time. Promise.” The tiredness catches up to him, causing his eyes to close on their own as Namjoon cleans the mess.
“Come on baby, we should shower.”
“Too tired.”
“You don’t want to go out there all sticky and sweaty, do you?”
Jin whines for a moment, because the feeling of stickiness and sweat are definitely uncomfortable, but he also can’t feel his legs enough for a shower.
“Fine. But you have to carry me.”
Namjoon laughs while lifting the wolf up, letting him wrap his legs around his torso as he makes his way over to the stall. The warm water runs between both of their bodies, washing away every trace of the lewd acts that were just committed. Every trace except the smell of sex that lingers in the air, mixing with the orange and vanilla of the two hybrids. They stay like that for a while, hugging under the water as Namjoon hums a soft melody in Jin’s ear. Eventually, Namjoon does put the wolf down to properly wash him, supporting both of their body weights as the beta still can’t seem to stand.
“Was I too rough? It’s been so long…”
“You weren’t. I loved it. I love you.” Jin punctuates with a kiss, as deep and passionate as the first one they shared.
“I love you too. I’m sorry about Y/N.”
“And I’m sorry about Yoongi. I know you’re not his biggest fan.”
“So…where do we go from here?” It’s a rare moment, where Namjoon’s the one asking instead of answering. But the look on his face makes it clear that he really doesn’t know.
“We keep each other’s secret.”
Namjoon quirks up a brow as Jin further explains, “We keep it between us, manage our feelings, and the pack never has to know. I’m guessing that’s what you were planning on doing anyway, so just add me into it.”
Damn, Jin really did have him all figured out.
“Okay. We’ll keep it between us.”
Fool-proof plan, right?
____
A/N: Don't worry friends, Hobi was NOT listening to that filth. Baby was watching Netflix with Jimin on the other side of the mansion (after excitedly telling him about therapy <3)
Permanent Taglist: @skyys-universe @morelovefortn @seagulljk @shadowyjellyfishfest @m4gg13-g @wittyreader
Series Taglist [CLOSED]: @welcometomyworld13 @kalala22 @fxirytaetae @btsfluffsworld @belikejk @shycreationdreamland @danielle143 @singukieee @blackrockshooter780 @g-b-artist @i-have-no-life-charlie @sopemee @no-regrets-just-confusion @acciocriativity @ldysmfrst @amara-mars @caelumwrites @estrellaburnxd @borahaetelevision @on-1ce @fuckthinking @jaiele
305 notes · View notes
shanastoryteller · 5 months
Note
Please more Marriage Assassin WQ, please! Thanks and happy holidays!
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
His wife was sent here to kill him.
"You cannot tell Lan Zhan."
She blinks at him, obviously not having expected that reaction. "I ... wasn't planning to?"
He'll kill her. Sort of gleefully too, because Lan Zhan has a possessive streak and Wei Wuxian bowed three times to someone that wasn't him and his wife has been planning to kill him for her first bow.
"Okay," he says, pacing the length of their room. "Okay. Do you know where your family is? Are they being kept at the palace? Because that will make things very difficult, let me tell you. Uncle Jiang is not going to like this." He pauses, tapping his flute against his lips. "I could maybe do it on my own, with some, um, back up," Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng and probably even Lan Xichen if Lan Zhan has anything to say about it, "and if we wear, I don't know, disguises or something maybe we don't have to turn this into an interclan thing."
Or they could just kill everyone. No one to blab about what a bunch of clan heirs are getting up to if they don't leave any survivors.
Wen Qing is staring. "You - what are you - I was going to kill you. I came here to kill you!"
"Yes, I heard you the first time," he says patiently. She scowls and he's been married to her long enough to know his best bet is to head her off before she starts. "You were willing to do anything for your family, even if it was stealing and killing. I get it. When your uncle came after my family, I used this." He flicks the yin iron out of his sleeve and it lazily spins in the air between them, toxic and sparking and rotting the air around it just from it's very existence. "I made this. You were just going to kill one person. Not thrilled that it was me, obviously, but if we're weighing sins you're not even going to budge the scale."
Lan Zhan has been sort of anxious lately. If he gets him riled up enough, Wei Wuxian can probably get him to agree to secretly kidnapping and or assassinating various Wens without him wanting to know specifics.
Wen Qing is still staring at him, in a way that's frankly very unnerving. What did she think he was going to do when she told him? Honestly.
420 notes · View notes
kalki-tarot · 6 months
Text
Your first Kiss with them 🎧🍷💕
Pick a picture, my beautiful souls ♡
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Pictures are taken from Pinterest.
This may not resonate with everyone. I'll use tarot and my own intuition so take what resonates and leave the rest. Don't force anything and this is just for entertainment purposes. This reading will be very specific </3
Do not steal/copy my work. Strict action(s) would be taken against you.
More pick a pile readings !
Pile 1
Death, the devil, 7 swords, 10 pentacles, the sun, ace of swords, 9 wands, 4 pentacles, queen of swords (bottom of deck)
TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️
Right off the bat, pile 1. I sense you fear intimacy or being close with anyone in general. Maybe due to past experiences? Someone maybe forced you in the past or took advantage of you. I'm really sorry if that happened to you. So, now you've developed a fear of getting so close or vulnerable with anyone.
Pile 2 also has messages for you.
Your first kiss will happen after you've let go of certain fears. You may hesitate at first, but of course, it'll happen with your consent. You may get flashes of the past but you'll stand strong and let them kiss you or vice versa. This kiss will mark a new beginning as it'll signify the fears finally leaving your soul & mind.
The kiss will feel soft and fresh, like a warm summer breeze. It'll make you both happy. You'll feel content and comfortable while it happens. You will feel as you're in your power, finally. The kiss will be smooth. It can happen during the day or under the sunlight. I'm even getting a beach for some of you. It'll be overall fantastic as per your choice.
Reblog this post to claim it!
Pile 2
Death rx, page of cups, the star, 9 wands, 2 swords, six of cups, the world, 10 swords rx (bottom of deck)
This feels like a fantasy! The kiss will happen just like the way you imagine it lol. Statight outta your dreams. It'll be wet and sloppy, can use lots of tounge play(?) Idk guys I'm not experienced in these kinda things 💀😭 but It'll definitely give you butterflies in the stomach.
This will be memorable kiss, even after some years you'll still remember every bit of the detail and be nostalgic about it. This can happen outside or even at a place that's far away from your home. Like while traveling or something?
You may be combating an inevitable change while this happens. Like there's a message for you to change, change the way you've been doing things all the time. Change the way you think. Don't resist change.
Let's come back to the moment of yours, the kiss will be very romantic and emotional . A little bit playful also. I'm getting biting the lips and teasing a lot. This feels like a long kiss. This will take place at a place where there aren't many people around.
It will help you release negative thoughts and feelings you've been holding all this time. So good luck with that!
Reblog this post to claim it!
Pile 3
10 cups, strength, 9 wands, the fool, 4 swords, 5 swords, page of pentacles, 2 of wands.
Cute! Your first kiss may take place in a garden or a forest where you went to travel or camp or smth. I feel like the kiss will be initiated by the feminine energy in the connection. The kiss will make you feel young and vibrant. Your heart will race a lot. It may happen on a risky place like in the public or where someone can watch or catch you.
But the feelings would be so intense and magical. You'll be drawn towards eachother like magnets. I see a height difference between you guys.
You may have a fight before this happens, and suddenly the overwhelming feelings take over and you guys kiss. You both will literally surrender yourselves to one another. Very intimate and passionate energy.
This moment will be shocking or unexpected but you'll definitely like it!
Reblog this post to claim it!
874 notes · View notes
fromthespaceamundo · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Buttercup, from The Powerpuff Girls (1998)
"Buttercup is the Powerpuff Girl with attitude and a volcanic temper. There’s nothing she likes better than getting to grips with her enemies and is often frustrated when she is held back by Blossom and Bubbles. She secretly feels she should be their leader.
She is very ‘Zen’ and disciplined and battles against a constant demon, that of being seen as girlish! The ultimate tomboy, Buttercup’s philosophy is to hit first and ask questions later.
Although this attitude makes her the most courageous of the girls it can also backfire making her, her own worst enemy. But don’t let the hard exterior fool you, beneath it all she is just a little girl."
1. What do you think of school?
Buttercup: I don’t.
2. What do you think of evil?
Buttercup: Keeps me busy.
3. What do you want?
Buttercup: To leave.
4. What do you hate?
Buttercup: Evil.
5. What do you love?
Buttercup: Fighting.
6. What would you do with a million dollars?
Buttercup: Wait for someone to steal it so I could beat them up.
7. Do you know the alphabet?
Buttercup: You callin' me stupid.
8. Do you watch TV?
Buttercup: Duh, cartoons!
9. When not saving the world, what do you do?
Buttercup: Look for fights.
10. What would you do if you didn't have superpowers?
Buttercup: What would you do if I shoved that tape recorder up your nose?
---
Source: Cartoon Network (press release from 1998)
254 notes · View notes
circeyoru · 1 month
Text
Unwanted Soul _ Part 10 = Requested
[Yandere!Alastor x Owner of his Soul!Reader]
Part 1 — Part 2 — Part 2.5 (ask) — Part 3 — Part 4 — Part 5 — Part 6 — Part 7 — Part 8 — Part 9 — Part 10 (here)
Tumblr media
You’re sure it didn’t take a second after Alastor heard the introduction to immediately grab Kat with his many black tendrils that appeared under Kat’s feet. Her high-pitch screams made you cover your ears and and squeeze your eyes shut. At your discomfort, Alastor had a tendril wrapped around her mouth
You watched while Alastor had that raging murderous smile on his face while his eyes turned back. He threw Kat from building to building, never letting go and giving her a moment to recover. You timed a good 10 minutes before you placed a hand on Alastor’s arm to snap him out of his rage
It was considerate of him to not personally deal with her because you were still near and you two were out in the open so anything could happen. Normally, he would have torn her limb from limb and chomped down on her flesh like a piece of meat. Now this was a new method of torture
At your touch, Alastor’s head snapped to you. You pointed to a spot on the side of your head and told him Kat was marked by Vox’s servant symbol, meaning the contract she was mentioning had been one with Vox. Alastor’s grin widened even more and gave one final throw into the ground, creating a crater before releasing her from his hold
Kat gasped and groaned, trying to get up but fell back down. Slowly, she crawled her way out of the crater and ended up at your feet. You watched her with distain and pity. You honestly can’t understand why she’d take Vox’s deal, she was taken advantage of, possibility due to her having just arrived in Hell at the time and didn’t know the importance of a soul contract
“How dare you die…” Kat hissed, his hands clenched to fists. “You have no idea what I went through after that f**king stunt you pulled!”
“I’m assuming you meant you stealing My Darling’s work as your own?” Alastor glared sharply at Kat.
Kat laughed, “Hahahahaha! What kind of lies did you feed him?” She pointed a finger at you, “This f**ker let me! The b*tch was happy to write for me! I take the credit cause you don’t want the attention, remember?”
Your eyes narrowed. That’s what you told yourself all those time. You told yourself it was fine because you didn’t like all this publicity and attention. Yet the fact that you felt anger towards it meant you didn’t want to give your work to another. At least not when all this was given to someone like her
Honestly, how can she blame her later misfortune on your death? She was your best friend, shouldn’t she feel something about it? Anything? Even the slighty sadness before all this?
You gripped onto Alastor’s hand, feeling a headache and dizziness growing. You whispered that you wanted to go home
Alastor understood and with a final slap at the poor excuse of a friend across the face with his end of the cane, Alastor brought you two back to your shared room. Alastor asked if you needed anything but you merely said you needed some time alone
“If you require anything, Love. Just call me.”
“...”
Back at the crater, before Kat could recover from the blow or curse. She was swiftly pinned to the ground by the neck, a situation that was all too familiar. Sharp blade like needles stabbed into her hands and knees. Dread filled every fiber of her body as she tried to get out of the hold she’s under but her body was frozen in fear
Just like before
“Aww, The Dear Writer left so quickly… What a thoughtful bodyguard too. Nothing less will be fitting for the Dear.” The new figure cooed, their shoes applied more force on Kat’s neck, grinding her into the ground. “Don’t you agree, Faker?”
“How did you find me?” Kat shivered against the hold. “Ce— Ahhhhh!”
“Ah ah~ I think it’s only right that I have a new name down here, I’m Nemesis now.” The demon chuckled, “Not hard considering your new boss is quite infamous around the city. What with all the technology he sells, you appearing on TV was just an easy guess. Though my services aren’t required when you have this.”
Kat screamed when a sharp blade pierced into the place where Vox’s contract mark was implanted. 
Nemesis’ lips curved into a twisted smile as they continued to slowly torture the screaming female. “So where can I find the Dear Writer?”
“Hazbin… Hotel…”
“Many thanks.” Nemesis’ tail pulled out the blades without warning one by one, their ear flickering at the screams while they pulled out their phone. They grinned, pressing on something, “I think you were in the spotlight of fame a bit too long down here. Let’s return you to the nothing you are.”
Over the past few days, you’ve been working non-stop making all those TVs and speakers that you promised Vox. While doing so, you tried not using your pages and used your quill to write in the air like Lucifer suggested, it took some time since the mechanism was more complex than what you tried before. Though it offer as good exercise for you
Smoothly, you somehow managed to slowly not use your quill as well and changed to using your finger to scribble words in the air before flicking at it to summon your written object. That took way more energy that you can manage because the word required energy then the conjuration required even more energy
But you managed because you needed something to distract yourself from the recent train of events and emotional burn out
Alastor’s been trying to get you to pause in your work and relax. You ignore it all together and continued, even when Alastor pulled you away and into his arms, you were motionless and repeated told him to let go so you could work. All he could do was continue to provide you with meals and reminders to rest since you were practicing and needed energy to continue
At least that got you to pull away from work. The light in your eyes was soft and dimmed, but it was better than when you were first on the verge of breaking down like a broken doll
Like before, Charlie and the others asked about you from Alastor when he was cooking your meals. It was like the time when you first arrived in the hotel, that was when you were doing it of your own volitation with Alastor as your excuse. Now, it was because you were helping the hotel and got unwanted attention
When all of Vox’s devices were being ddelivered by Charlie, Vaggie, and Husk with a hypnotic resistance charm casted on them by you, you covered yourself in a blanket and drowned yourself in music
You were exhausted physically and mentally, you wanted to push yourself even more but you knew Alastor would be against it all the way and you don’t want to push him to do forceful thing just to make you see reason. You know Alastor would feel worse than you do because of his love and devotion towards you
At the thought of that, you feel even worse that you were treating Alastor do badly. Even worse, he’s seeing this pathetic side of you. What if he leaves you? What if he thinks you’re not worth it? What if—
A familiar rhythemic knocking on your door brought you out of your thoughts. Alastor’s muffle voice came through, “Beloved.” That nickname that melted your worries and comforted you, “I think there’s someone you should meet.”
You wondered who Alastor would just let into your room, even the hotel members didn’t get that luxury and that includes Niffty because Alastor handles the maintainance of your room all on his own. You trust Alastor, “Sure, come on in.”
The door opened and someone you’re unfamiliar with rushed in while Alastor stood guard at the door after closing it shut and locking it. “I’m Nemesis, I’m a big big fan of your work! Completely obsessed really! Oh my god! Or is it oh my Lucifer now? Anyways! It’s so good to finally meet you in the flesh! Well, not flesh flesh, but this afterlife is like another life, so~”
“Nemesis. As in like revenge? Enacting retribution?” You blinked at the name, it reminds you of Alastor’s since his meant tormentor, avenger, and persecutor. 
They got real close to your face as their smile spread, “Woah, truly the mind of a writer. You got my name reference.” They straightened up as they shrugged, “Other people, oops, demons only got that it’s Greek and hard to remember. Urgh, no class at all. They remember you by title too! Can you guess mine?”
Your eyebrow raised in confusion, you don’t know why this demon, Nemesis, was this causal with you. Though you figured that they had a talk with Alastor beforehand, that’s why Alastor even allowed them to be in here and talking with you. Even with close promixity
You observed Nemesis as they wanted. They were a snow leopard type of demon, with the fluffy ears on top of their head and tail behind them swishing like that of a cat’s. But you can’t tell whether it was just because it was their favourite animal, something they’re interested, or death related. Maybe something that they hate too, there was a sick irony in Hell
Your eyes traveled down to the row of white stielett-type weapons on their sides, they looked like giant dagger-sized needles but to you, they looked more like a pen. When Nemesis noticed your gaze, they took one from each side and started demonstrating to you how it was used like a performance
“The Dancing Needle.” Your lips moved and words came out before you knew it. At Nemesis’ frozen state and Alastor’s shocked face, you covered your mouth. “S—”
“How did you know?” Nemesis raved with shock, “You only observed too!”
You looked away, “It was nothing…”
Nemesis shook their head, “No way! It was amazing! If only I realized earlier…”
“Realized what?”
“That you’re the real author of that best selling novel that got so much attention.”
Nemesis went on to tell you. In the living world, they were Cecil and the editor for Karolina
During then, Cecil as an editor fell in love with the novels that Karolina had written. By some miracle, Cecil was given the chance to work as Karolina’s editor in the future and somewhat manager and caretaker since authors needed someone to ground them and since both were female, it was perfect
Over the years, Cecil noticed that Karolina was always attending public events and activities to boost popularity. It was normal, but to Cecil, it was weird that Karolina never actually sat down and written anything or researched for ideas. There was no burnout or ridiculous sleep schedules to follow and adapt to just to write a novel
Yet the requested writings were always provided and they were nearly to perfection, with minor grammar and some careless mis-spelling probably due to tiredness or being in the moment. It was an editor’s dream to work for someone like this. An author that’s famous and lively, and mostly punctual so nothing was forced or rushed to complete and do
But Cecil noticed the odd teachings and advices that Karolina would give to other people. There was nothing solid about it, it was all either the same old same old or just plain out weird to say. She had no accounts to retell, no personal examples to list. Yet she never asked Cecil for help
There was an interesting meeting that Karolina would always do. Whenever a deadline was near, Karolina would visit a friend of hers. Cecil thought it was for comfort and causal chatting at first, but every time she returns, there was more to tell on interviews and talk shows
To Cecil, it felt like someone was providing for Karolina
And Cecil was right. After the death of that friend, Karolina seemingly lost creativity and motivation. She lied on news channel that the novel was written for that friend to get through depression, she lied and painted herself as a caring and loving friend that wanted what’s best for that friend
Isn’t it odd that Karolina continues to sign contracts and appearances on screen regarding the novel? Some people requested for some detail clarification, but she denied them and said it was all secrets saved for her friend
Her friend this, her friend that. Everything was her friend, every excuse was her friend. So Cecil did some digging
Back when the first novel of the series was released, there was a buzz of a copycat that tried to steal Karolina’s work but failed. Cecil got her hands on that copy and read through it, the writing style was identicial to the later volumes that was published, the ideas that were cut off in this copy was in the later volumes
Cecil checked the statistics and comments, the first book had plotholes here and there, some even said it feels like things were missing here and there. But overall, it was still a good story. So there was a push to continue sequel to the first novel
Pages all dropped to the floor at the realization. That friend… That friend that Karolina was caring for… That friend had to be the real author of the books. It all made sense! Cecil searched online and found that that friend died, not by accident or sickness. No… Suicide…
An unfathomable rage and need for justice overtook Cecil and she was determined to see that Karolina suffers a slow and painful down. It was hard to pull it off, but somehow it was managed
Cecil pinned Karolina down with pens and cutters, then used daggers to stab all over her body without hitting any vitals. Cecil sliced words into her skin, ‘copycat’, ‘faker’, ‘liar’, ‘abuser’, and ‘murderer’. Then, Cecil decapitated Karolina’s head off of her body
Courtmeeting was given to Cecil where she used her chance to reveal it all. Who was the real author and who was the fake. Who was in the victim and who was the perpetator. Cecil announced that she is aware and admit that she done wrong, but if she could do it again, she would
The death sentence was passed down
Nemesis kneeled on their knees, looking up at you, tears flowing. “You suffered so much and no one knew or cared. Now they do, I’m included.” They held one of your hand, “So don’t knock yourself down, My Writer.”
Alastor took your other hand, placing a kiss on it, “We will deal with all your troubles so you can relax~ My Beloved.”
You can’t help but chuckled with a carefree closed-eye smile, “Oh you two…” But then your eyes snapped open and eyed the two, then focused on Nemesis. “Oh… There’s two of them now…”
Alastor and Nemesis eyed each other and smiled widely. “Whatever do you mean?”
Tumblr media
Note: And that's the end of this arc~ Okay okay, I heard you guys loud and clear. No end yet cause you guys are willing to wait and read more. I'm taking a break from this series for a while to do other ones. But what do you think of this one?
Circe Y. 
My Works: MASTERLIST
Taglist: (those that don't specify to being in all the works' taglist will automatically be assumed to be in whichever series they comment on)
@aconfusedwonderland @crowleysthings @donustellaron @mistpurpl3 @lucifers-silhouette @fluffy-koalala @nevermore-ramblings @justboredforreal @youroneandonlysimp @falsemain @scenteddelusion5 @anni1600 @readergirlstuff @salutations-demonsanddappers @mistpurpl3 @haruskrd @biadoll21 @speedycoffeedelight @wendds @paninibit @emperatris-rinaka @lucifers-silhouette @an-idyllic-novelist @cyannese-rose @type-ink @saccharine-nectarine
259 notes · View notes
ifearzombies · 10 months
Text
Common Things That Cause Spats in the HoL
1- Mammon stealing something of Levi's. Or anyone. Levi's just his most common target.
2- Someone eating Beel's food
3- Waking Belphie from a nap
4- Stealing any brothers' time with MC
5- "OH MY LORD DIAVOLO HURRY UP IN THE FUCKING BATHROOM!"
6- Asmo waking people up when he's fucking someone b/c motherfucker loves the sound of his own voice so when he masturbates or fucks, everyone in the house hears it.
7- Someone didn't do their chores
8- The brothers hear you fucking anyone other than them in your room. (They get so petty).
9- Beel eating something that belongs to someone or trying to eat the house. Again.
10- Lyric pranks. They've been forbidden since that one time MC did the lyrics for "Let Me See Your O Face". You all still do them.
11- MC not warning Lucifer if Diavolo's coming over.
12- Lucifer not warning anyone else that Diavolo was coming over.
13- Pranking Barbatos with fake rats when he visits. It took a week to rebuilt the living room.
14- Mammon attempting to take pics of people without permission.
15- MC pranking everyone with fake facts about the Human Realm
16- Anyone attempting to ruin Luke's innocence in front of MC and/or Simeon
17- MC letting Solomon make dinner for the brothers >:)
634 notes · View notes
Note
I'm curious, what if mc in the shipper au is polyamorous and dates multiple or perhaps all of the kings, what then?
I'll be including Asmodeus as one of the kings MC starts dating because I want to write for Dantalian as well.
Whb shippers reacting to a poly!Mc dating all the kings
Well, you're dating Satan, so Paimon doesn't complain that much. Would probably still bicker with some of the more active shippers about which king you like most, but he'll be chiller in the forums. He continues his usual fan-fic writing and edit making maybe throwing in some photos of you and another king so he doesn't get pilled on by the other shippers.
Eligos takes a hit when he hears that but he learns to accept it. This is... good, from his point of view. Mammon loves seeing you being greedy for lovers and Eligos likes seeing Mammon happy, it's a win win situation. After all, everyone in hell belongs to Mammon, so you're basicly just playing with some toys that belong to you. Eligos is of the opinion that you're only trully dating Mammon and the other kings are side-dishes, so he let's it happen.
Foras cries. He just cries. He's absolutely godsmaked as to how you could possibly convince Leviathan to let you date other people. On one hand, he's happy that you consider his majesty your lover. On the other hand, how dare you go out and show your affection to other's. He tries to keep you in Hades as much as possible, right next to Leviathan's side, and he'll only stop when either you or Leviathan tell him to. Stops doxxing people for a month since he's too sad to open the forums.
Glasylabolas is sad, but for other reasons. How is he supposed to start drama when it's public information that you're dating all the kings?! He tries to argue with people about which king you love best, but he only gets responses from try hards (Gamigin) which is less fun than having all the forums in chaos. Plus, Gamigin never leaves Paradise Lost and he was doxxed ages ago, so he no longer has where to show off his hacker powers.
You better hope that Beelzebub set Amon down and explained what polyamory is because the moment he finds out that His Majesty Beelzebub's s/o is being stolen by the other kings, he sees red. The one law that seperates Avisos from Abaddon is that you're not to steal someone's lover, which is how Amon percieves this whole ordeal. At one point you were on a peaceful date with Mammon and you see Amon making a beeline to you. He was ready to shoot Mammon (as if one bullet could kill him) but you had to throughly explain to him the concept of polyamory.
Amon: So it's like an orgy... but romantic?
Mammon: Sometimes it's just an orgy
Mc: Mammon! But yeah, that's kind of it.
Will leave you alone from that point onward. He has no interest in destroying a happy law-abiding relationship.
Dantalian is also sad that he no longer has anyone to fight with in the forums. But he has a lot of fun going "I told you" on every post he made about how a poly relationship is the only logical step for the relationship between you and the kings. Him and the whole Abaddon crew would ask if they can join in the bedroom fun and 9/10 Asmodeus even encourages them. Whether you like it or not, dating Asmodeus was always the gate way drug to being into polyamory.
Gamigin chockes on his spit when you tell him that you're dating all the kings. He looks at you with this face
Tumblr media
He didn't know you could do that. He's still an avid Mc x Lucifer shipper and will continue to get into arguments with people that disagree. He had to be lectured by the Paradise Lost marketing manager (Buer) about how bad it looks for most of Paradise Lost's media output being arguments on the internet about a stupid topic. Gamigin stops redirecting his passion for the subject towards making sure that your stay at Paradise Lost is the best in hell. Finally he can talk with his brothers and they'll understand what he means by keeping you happy so you come to Paradise Lost more often.
168 notes · View notes