#Bonnacon

[evolutionsvoid]

Yes, yes we all know what this species does! Its method of warding off predators is quite infamous, but there is more to this creature than that! The whole entry can't be about it, so lets try to keep it together!

The Bonnacon is a species of bovine that inhabits plains, grasslands and some savannas. They are about the same size as your domesticated cow, though a few physical features cause them to stand out (and I am not talking about that one). First off is their reddish brown fur, which is made even more striking with the fiery coloration of their skin and dewlap. These bright oranges are hard to miss, as this is not a species that cares about blending in! Another feature is the mane of brown hair that runs down their neck, almost similar to that of a horse's. And while we are looking at its head, the next thing to note is their horns. Compared to other bovines, these horns can seem a bit small. On top of that, they are curled so that no sharp points are exposed, and are positioned upon the head in such a way that they wouldn't do much when it comes to charging and ramming. Even if they were larger, the materials that makes up these horns is noticeably weaker than other bovine horns, making these horns bend under pressure. In truth, if a Bonnacon charged you, the real pain would be coming from this massive ungulate ramming into you, and not so much the pitiful horns. Yes, there are worse things they can do to you, but we aren't on that subject yet! 

Bonnacon travel in small herds, and spend a large portion of their days grazing. They feed upon a wide variety of vegetation, with very few plants exempt from their menu. One of the major notes of their diet is that they graze upon plants that are typically poisonous to most other herbivores. Other plant eaters avoid these particular shrubs or growths like the plague, while the Bonnacon munches upon them without a care in the world. From what we understand, their digestive system is capable of handling a variety of toxins, and uses particular chemicals found in nasty plants as fuel for something else (no, we aren't talking about that part yet). This gives this bovine a wider selection of plants to choose from when feeding, and it also means a food source free from competition. For the ecosystem, they play an important part in keeping these poisonous and noxious plants in check, preventing them from growing out of control due to zero grazing.

When mating season kicks in, the male Bonnacon's look to round up as many females as possible, though the competition between them is not as violent as other bovines. While you may expect them battering each other with their horns and resorting to violence, such fights rarely break out. I will remind you that their horns are pretty poor for battle, though they do have a purpose here. Apparently, these horns are good indicators of health and virility, so simply showing them off is enough to woo the ladies. When it comes to keeping away competing males, they raise their tails and show off the colorful markings on their rumps (Just the rumps! Nothing else yet). These too are representative of their health and strength, and other males can easily gauge if this is a fight they can win. Most of the time, these displays are enough to defuse the situation, with the lesser Bonnacon accepting that they could never win this battle. If it comes to fighting, it is done through awkward body battering and tail whips, more akin to a drunken shoving match than any legitimate brawl. This species isn't exactly known for the most dignified ways of warding off foes. 

And now that I have gone over the Bonnacon facts that everyone will skip over, it is time for the part all the readers came for. Lets all ask the question that will get us there: "Hey Chlora, how do Bonnacon ward off predators?" Good question, children! Well, the Bonnacon has a super secret weapon up its sleeve whenever a big mean carnivore comes to eat it! When the big bad wolf comes creeping up, the poor little Bonnacon lifts its tail up and fires off a wet blast of caustic fecal matter that will douse the land and predator in a brown burning shower of shit that would make any public outhouse blowout after a dinner of bad fish tacos look like a lazy day of beach reading! THERE! WE'RE AT THE POOP PART! ARE YOU HAPPY!? Now we get to talk about how the Bonnacon fights its battles with fiery turd farts! YIPPEE!

Now that I got that out of my system, indeed the Bonnacon weaponizes its own fecal matter. It seems that there is a combination of chemicals brought in from its diet mixed in with its own special intestinal secretions that create this effect. All this is infused into its waste, and it appears that the act of ejecting it from its bowels starts the reaction. When the feces is sprayed from its body, a reaction within kicks off which creates the rise in temperature and creation of caustic fluids. While this waste does not actually catch on fire, the high heat of it combined with its acidic coating certainly gives the feeling of being set aflame while it burns through your skin. Their "ejection" system is specially designed to release this waste with long distance and wide range. It is meant to either catch the predator within the burning cone of filth, or create a hazard so foul that any meat eater would think twice before pursuing. Typically this butt blast is fired off just before the Bonnacon flees, which some humorous folk have interpreted into this species launching itself to safety by the propulsion of its own fiery flatulence. Oh what a lark.

Obviously, ammunition for this kind of firepower is limited, and thus the Bonnacon must use it sparingly between meals. This is why they bear the bright orange and dark markings upon their rump, as they serve as a warning sign to potential predators. When threatened, they will raise their tails to fully show off these colors, as a "last chance" for their foe before they open fire. You may also notice that these behinds lack hair, and that is because they don't want their own feces getting caught in their fur. Would be quite the mess to get out! 

Outside of the endless crude jokes and comments one can mine from the Bonnacon's existence, they do actually have a place in the local culture. Due to their diet of nasty plants, they can be used to clear land that has been overgrown by noxious and dangerous weeds. Their hide has been found to make resilient leather, the kind that is resistant to caustic agents and damaging fluids. Their meat....well, most people avoid it. Due to their diet, it can contain some nasty stuff unless it is thoroughly cooked to a crisp. Even then, you won't find a lot of folk willing to have a taste once they learn what beast it comes from. I, for one, gave it a try when I found a reputable chef that was known for preparing it. It was...fine. Nothing to write home about, but it certainly didn't have the flavors most people would expect when coming from a Bonnacon. And of course, we can't ignore their feces, as that even has a use! It turns out, Bonnacon waste is actually a really good fertilizer, once you let it cool down and its fluids grow inert. But sometimes, that burning pile of poo has its uses! If you want to prepare a field or flower bed, and know it is loaded with wild seeds of weeds you don't want, then lay down a layer of fresh Bonnacon poop. The heat and acidity of it will bake out all the seeds and roots that are waiting down below, and then add nutrients once it has burned itself out. In fact, some species of plant have designed their seeds to only be spread and germinated by Bonnacon waste! So we've taken a note from these plants and use it to clear out our flower beds! Now your garden is ready for planting! It is a pretty clever way to do it, but just be ready to get a lot of complaints from your neighbors.        

Chlora Myron

Dryad Natural Historian

-------------------------------------------------

"Bonnacon"

Ah the infamous Bonnacon! The ol' mammalian bombardier beetle! Had to show up sooner or later.

#bonnacon #monster #creature #cow #art #drawing

[quailtea]

Working on something new

#illustration #artists on tumblr #quailtea #basilisk #bonnacon #risograph #bestiary

[original-post-locator]

The bonnacon is a bull-like beast described in medieval beastiaries that expels caustic dung at its enemies. Reportedly, its dung can cover a distance of two acres.

Source: https://bestiary.ca/beasts/beast80.htm

#shitposting #literally shitposting #medieval bestiary #bestiary #original post located #bonnacon

[saucylobster]

Cattocon wander the lonely mires of the world, far from human sight. Their eyes are milky and blind however a third eye on their forehead emits a painful aura capable of turning the stomach and paralysing onlookers with a simple glance. Approaching from behind is a bad idea too, as Cattocon are capable of firing a jet of flammable waste from their rear. Bonnablepas are stocky pokemon held aloft by long legs and adorned with thick armour, making them difficult to take down. Their natural weapons have only grown more potent as they have aged and ultimately they are prey nowhere near worth the troble of taking down. Despite their fearsome weapons and impregnable defence, they are shy pokemon and would rather be left alone in isolation. --Attack Info-- --Ability Info--

#fakemon #fakedex #saucylobster #tresto #catoblepas #bonnacon #wildebeest #gnu #cattle #cow #bison

[spidermilkshake]

Ancardia's Unusual Animals--The Bonnacon

Classification: Beast (bovine)

Habitat: Grass and scrublands in the Western regions, especially the Ayn Coastlands, Silver Coastlands, and parts of the Fallar and Western Heartland.

            Bonnacon are perhaps among the most bizarre wild bovines to exist in Ancardia, and this is chiefly because of their main form of self-defense. While most hooved beasts have great speed and awareness, or great size and impressive horns, bonnacon have none of these but one very strange natural weapon. With the back, hips, shoulders and tail covered in squat, tough keratin scales, bonnacon average as slightly smaller than a domesticated auroch and slightly larger than a gnu, and lack horns altogether. Their only defense is their natural arcane abilities—which are limited to igniting gases from their rears into a sheet of flame that can reach pursuers as far away as 12 meters. This flame is unusually hot, and tends to not only ignite hair, clothes and wooden weapons, but is also hot enough to heat steel and other highly-conductive metals to a burning temperature within 15 seconds, as well as warp and distort glass. A wild creature, the bonnacon is also dangerously skittish, and will bolt and flame at the slightest provocation. The only known natural predators of the bonnacon are the Crocotta and the Antediluvian Dire-Drake, both of which use ambush tactics and superior jaw strength to quickly attack the beast from the front, before it can turn around and become a real danger.

            Bonnacon are unlike many wild ungulates in that they don’t live in large herds, most likely due to the issue of friendly-fire if a large group of bonnacon were spooked all at once in close proximity to each other. Bonnacon herds usually number only between 5 and 12 individuals, led by one breeding male along with a few adult females, sometimes also with their adolescent and juvenile young. Bonnacon browse a large variety of tougher vegetation, being very well adapted to semi-arid and dry montane climates, and are especially resilient in areas with a large density of toxic plant species, such as hogweed, daturas, prickly nightshades and euphorbias. It is believed that something to do with the toxicity of the plants it prefers gives it greater ability to shoot fire. Bonnacon are born able to stand and then run within about ten minutes, and area also born able to shoot flame as well, though not as strongly. It takes roughly 2 years for a young bonnacon to grow to close to adult size, though it is only in the third year that it is fully developed.

            In older Ages, the Old Kingdoms Empire’s nobility often considered hunting bonnacon to be a mark of high status—no doubt due to the sheer suicidal nature of any activity that involves approaching such a beast, especially of chasing one. Dogs and servants on horseback were usually sent ahead of their leigelords with the rationale being to bait the bonnacon into expending all of its ammunition before the lords on horseback themselves were meant to overtake the animal and attack it with spears or shortbows; several ancient nobles famously were torched to death as the creatures’ defended themselves anyways, and one notable taxidermized bonnacon specimen from the 4th Age is nowadays believed to be a hoaxed example made out of attaching pieces of tortoise shells to a dead calf. Among other cultures, bonnacon are sometimes considered pests. Sahel hurthling tribes who keep dairy auroch, zebu, and other bovines are often tasked with creating scarecrow-like puppets they can raise up and deploy from afar in order to scare off roaming wild bonnacon—as bonnacon can interbreed with some other bovines and result in a heifer calf that will grow to produce a foul, sulphureous milk. Others, like the Frost Giants and Sostunian tribes, are known to create spiked stone walls outside of their normal spiked wooden fencing separated by a few meters, strictly to keep bonnacon from getting too close to wooden structures and crop fields and ending up incinerating them and the fences if they are scared away by guard animals or farmers.

#ancardia #ancardian homebrew #bestiary #mixed media #creatures #animals #Ancient Domains of Mystery #ADOM #Dnd-like #Bonnacon #the fire-farting legendary cow #yes really

[liverpoollomo]

Bonnacons Of Doom at Quarry. Nikon F65. Ilford Delta 3200.

When I shoot live bands with my Nikon F65 I tens to use aperture priority and stay at f1.8. Most of the time this works well. However when I went to see the Bonnacons Of Doom at Quarry last year the light proved insufficient. The meter was setting the shutter speed to between 30th and 20th of a second and this resulted in some blurry shots.

#liverpool #liverpoollomo #lomo #lomography #analogue photography #nikon f65 #nikon slr #film slr #ilford delta 3200 #black and white photography #35mm film #high iso #3200 iso #Bonnacons Of Doom #live music #quarry #psychedelic rock #post rock #film is not dead #don't think just shoot

[bestbitterplease]

Bonnacons of Doom, my new favourite band at the moment, scribbled by me. First heard in December on bbc Riley and Coe, which is also quite quite brilliant. Go listen.

#bbc #Riley and coe #6music #Bonnacons of Doom #Liverpool #music #band poster #gig poster #alt music #alternative #alt girl #alt male #alt boy #me #my art #ink #sketch #sketchbook #uk music #indie music #indie

[obeythebutler]

Hi! I'm new to your blog so I apologize if I mess anything up.

Could I request MC surprising the brothers with a feast they accidentally cooked up because they were worried that there worried that their wouldn't be enough food for the brothers?

It's 7:30am and his brother still aren't ready for RAD.

Hell, they haven't even stepped down for breakfast. Even Beel, never the one to miss it is missing.

Did all his brothers decide to skip today's classes? Were they orchestrating some other useless prank?

Lucifer stares at his watch, waiting. If they don't come down in the next five minutes he's going to leave them at home and give them detention. Maybe he'll have to pull Mammon out of his bed again, or carry Belphegor down the stairs.

The thought of dragging his brothers like sacks of potatoes down the stairs makes his head ache. It’s always been like this, him caving in so easily to his brothers demands, being so lax on them.

The saving grace is the human exchange student.

MC.

They're on breakfast duty today, and Lucifer can smell the pleasant hint of roasted hellfire mushrooms. Cinnamon too. They've always been a diligent person when it comes to their work.

Unlike his brothers.

Sigh.

"If you all don't hurry up, the food is going to get cold!" Their voice rings from the kitchen, and Lucifer opens his mouth to give one last reprimand to his brothers, to hurry up and come down before he drags them.

There's a blur besides him then, a flurry of moment that messes up his perfectly styled hair.

"Food cooked by the human! I call dibs on it, I'm the great Mammon after all!"

The eldest gawks at his brother, perhaps in disbelief or surprise, and then fixes his hair in resignation. Whatever makes him be on time, his scoldings or MC's voice.

Lucifer rolls his shoulders, steps forward to get into the dining hall instead of the hallway, but then he senses footsteps on the stairs. Five pairs of shoes, each distinguishable from the other.

His brothers are a blur as they surpass him to get to the dining hall.

What the—

At this point, all the man can do is to slap his palm on his forehead.

They won't listen to him, but they'll willingly rush to the dining hall when MC calls, huh? For the sake of hell and everything that is corrupted, they're such simps that its intolerable to watch.

As soon as he steps in though, Lucifer is rendered speechless by the sight in front of him. So are the brothers.

There's just.....so many plates of food. Creamed Bonnacon, Devil Zebra Bacon Sandwich, Hell Pancakes, and that doesn't even cover it. Blood Strawberries, Caramel Shadow Tart, Ghost Watermelon....It's a feast fit for a banquet, and it must have taken so much time to cook all that...

"T-That's......that's just like that anime! Where the main character cooks up a feast for their roommates because they didn't want them to go hungry so they woke up at the crack of—"

"Shut yer mouth Levi." Mammon says, although there is no irritation in his tone as he gapes at the dining table. He can spot some of his favorite foods, given that there are plates and plates of them. He mentioned some of his favorite things to eat to MC long time back, but he didn't think that they would remember.

The fourth-born has a smile on his face now, as he stares at the cat drawn on his pancake with blueberry syrup. It's so cute.

He remembers MC placing some pots and utensils on the table the night before, stating that it would be less time-consuming in mornings given the rush.

His cheeks feel hot.

"Now, darling, that is quite a feast you have cooked up for us!" Asmodeus hangs behind MC's shoulder as he compliments them. There is still flour on their cheeks, and so he wipes it away from them using his thumb, earning squawks of protest from both Levi and Mammon. "Thank you so much! This is soo going on Devilgram!"

"I thought the usual wouldn't be enough," They mumble, nervously shifting their gaze from the brothers to the table. Asmo's weight on their shoulders is a comfortable one, yet the intense scrutiny they are subjected to makes them want to hide away. "Next thing I knew was that I kept adding and adding ingredients until I realised what I did. So you better finish it all."

Belphegor giggles. "That won't be a problem." He can sense his twin's growing hunger at the sight of the feast before him, and food does taste better when cooked by your loved ones. The demon is glad that he chose to be on time today.

Wait, Beel was right besides him, he isn't here....

"Woah—" MC can only stumble out the words as they are caught off guard when pulled into a hug by the sixth born. He's tall, and so warm. "Easy there!"

"Thank you MC!" Beel's voice is full of happiness, and he can't help but hug them for it. He knows his gluttony is a lot to handle, and it causes a lot of trouble for others, but them going out of their way to make extra efforts and ensuring that he and his brothers won't go hungry makes him feel loved.

He'll wait this time, to eat with MC.

"At what time did you wake up to cook all of this?"

You turn your head towards Satan, who is now besides you. Gazing at you ever so softly. "I woke up around three, couldn't sleep since I had drunk a lot of coffee the night before."

"Your sleep schedule will be messed up if you continue," He reprimands you, but his tone is light.

"Thank you for ensuring that we all don't go hungry though." Lucifer smiles as he says that.

Maybe this is what home is.

You and the brothers, cooking too much and enjoying it nevertheless. Casual conversation drifting across the table, with Hell coffee as bitter as ever, packing some for Purgatory Hall residents and leaving together for RAD as the gates to the house close behind you all in remembrance.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me x reader #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me leviathan #obey me mammon #obey me belphegor #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me imagines #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me leviathan x reader #obey me satan x reader #obey me asmodeus x reader #obey me beelzebub x reader #obey me belphegor x reader

[probablybadrpgideas]

a fire milking cow whose udders spew jets of flame. they can also be used for limited flight

­breed it with a bonnacon

#submission #enemy idea #fantasy

[a-book-of-creatures]

Are bonnacons compatible with humans:?

Please Do Not the Explosive Dung Ox

[wizardalexa]

Wizard Alexa, a close friend of mine was recently killed, and I need to fix his wounds so I can put his soul in his soon-to-be mostly-intact corpse. Please search simple recipes for Goblin Rejuvenation Cream.

✨The following is the simplest recipe Wizard Alexa found for Goblin Rejuvenation Cream. Wizard Alexa will omit the lengthy preamble where the writer of the recipe, Louchisa the Lovelorn Lich, rambles on about her personal life and how this Goblin Rejuvenation Cream saved her relationship, and skip to the recipe itself.✨ ✨Ingredients:✨

✨✨One cup yew sap, harvested at midnight under a full moon ✨✨Two pints dragon saliva (important: the dragon saliva must not be from a fire-breathing dragon. A dragon that breathes anything else is fine, just not fire) ✨✨Two tablespoons infernal witherspice ✨✨Three pints clotted bonnacon milk (n.b. it's the milk that's clotted, not the bonnacon) ✨✨1/2 cup pus from a wounded god (it doesn't have to be a full god; demigod pus is acceptable) ✨✨One unfertilized harpy egg ✨✨Cinnamon to taste ✨Directions:✨ ✨Put the dragon saliva, the bonnacon milk, and the god pus in a small cauldron, and bring to a low boil over a purple flame. (It doesn't matter what you do to make the flame purple, as long as it is.) Boil for two hours, stirring regularly, until the mixture turns slightly yellowish. Slowly drizzle in the yew sap, continuing to stir. Skim off the foam, and then continue boiling and stirring until no further foam forms. Add the witherspice and cinnamon and the contents of the harpy egg. (That is, crack the egg and add its insides; under no circumstances let any shell fragments touch the mixture.) Continue boiling and stirring until the mixture is completely homogeneous. Remove from the flame and let the mixture cool overnight.✨ ✨Recipe produces enough Goblin Rejuvenation Cream to treat two to twenty goblins, depending on their level of injury.✨

#recipe #goblin #just ask alexa #wizard alexa #wizardposting #wizard posting #wizardblogging #wizard blogging

[wodeworm]

Tarasque 𝕾𝕸𝖆𝖚𝖌𝖚𝖘𝖙 6

The vulgar offspring of Leviathan and the Bonnacon, The Tarasque is a legendary dragon that terrorized the southern regions of France. Said to be, fatter than a bull, longer than a horse, the face of some perverse feline, with teeth and spines like swords, fowl abyssal quality's, a greasy matted mane sat a top its horrid mound of bulk and scale, A torrential miasma of rancid gas, venoms and flame would endlessly discharge out of its gaping maw, tainting the very essence of a thing . all manner of weapon or battlement would be rendered lame in its presence, its otherworldly rampages leaving mounds of viscera and tainted reality in it wake. A holy woman that bore witness to grand miracles had been charged by the people of the land to deliver them from this great plague, she confronted the dragon, caught devouring one final victim, she doused it with sacred waters. its breath extinguished. and held up a effigy, the monster was instantly subdued. it meekly lumbered up to the woman like a lamb. She promptly slipped her belt around its neck and gently led it back to the village.

The people couldn’t believe their eyes, woman was leading the Tarasque toward them. They were filled with fear and hatred and immediately began pelting stones and spears. But its impenetrable shell still rendered their assaults worthless, the now docile beast offered no retaliation. The people had such hostility toward the monster who had killed their neighbors and livestock, they relentlessly summoned all manner of hex and curse upon the beast, for all the pain they thought was owed. The poor creature whose character had been completely changed stricken by endless dread and shame fell into its own maw.

let your loathing die with the loathsome, lest ye become a Tarasque!

#Tarasque #dragon #dragon art #smaugust 2023 #smaugust #mythological #digital art #illustration #creaturedesign #monster

[moishe-pipick]

Bonnacon - detail of a miniature from the Rochester Bestiary,

[jingszo]

When it comes to self-defense, skunks and spitting cobras have nothing on the bonnacon. If threatened, it fled. While fleeing, it defecated. Violently.

According to Pliny the Elder, the excrement voided the animal’s body with such explosive force that it could hit targets more than a football pitch away. Contact with its dung was said to burn like a kind of fire, scorching hunting dogs and anyone not equipped with protective gear. (There is some uncertainty whether the weapon was liquid or gaseous, super-heated or acidic.)

#mythical creatures #animal defence

[ffxivxd]

The rank S hunt, Bonnacon, was once known as a mild beast. However, he's now afflicted with a fit of rage that makes him gore any of his victims to death. Some researchers say that the smell of a special plant triggered the attack.

#ff14 #ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #ffxivxd #final fantasy 14

[p2ep]

it's a shame fantasy media never includes the humble bonnacon

#krestel speaks