#I could just buy one but the one I was looking at is 400$ which isn’t unreasonable

[belle-of-a-time]

I think I told yall that my Dr’s office was very confused when I called to check in about the wheelchair and hip brace I requested they ask my insurance about, I have an appointment in an hour to talk about it again and if they lose the paperwork again I will be losing It.

#I want a wheelchair so I can play with my friends when I go to conventions instead of having to find a couch to park myself on for #the majority of every single day #I could just buy one but the one I was looking at is 400$ which isn’t unreasonable #and all things considered is actually very cheap for a wheelchair #my mom despite us actually talking and me telling her that I don’t want to rely on anyone to push me around #and that I want to control where I go still decided a rollator was better even though like I’d rather use my cane than a walker #and when you sit on it it’s just a transfer chair and you have no real control over where you go #which is frustrating #I talked to them in September and for like two months I was like huh #I guess insurance is just taking a long time #only to call about other things and get told #hmm maybe it was another doctors office? #like No in fact I actually hate onboarding with doctors and establishing care #I’ve been going to the same place different doctors for a year now with my first visit in like March of last year #i’m just pissed #wish me luck

[dearlyjun]

CALL OUT MY NAME ☆ c. seungcheol

☆ PAIRING: slightly possessive boyfriend!cheol x reader (f)

☆ GENRE: NSFW (18+ readers only!!)

☆ SUMMARY: your ex boyfriend can’t seem to stop texting you lately; wouldn’t want to make your current boyfriend angry would you?

☆ WORD COUNT: about 1.8k

☆ WARNINGS: cheol is possessive in a protective way, mentions of an ex boyfriend that won't leave you alone, ex boyfriend is min yoongi, cheol has a deep voice, mentions of cheol working out, cheol is tatted, he wants to fight her battles for her (king), unprotected sex, different sex positions (cowgirl, kneeling missionary), semi voyeurism, clitoral stimulation, spanking (like once), cumshot, foul language, cheolie is very sweet at the end!! lmk if i missed anything!!

☆ AUTHORS NOTE: posting this in honor of @miupow’s birthday!! happy birthday, lia!! you’re one of my dearest friends (and moots) on here. im so glad we met!! and also shout out to lia for beta-ing her own bday fic and correcting my half asleep writing. yeah even i don’t know what was going on there.

BE ADDED TO MY TAGLIST HERE!

You were setting a bowl of food and a glass of iced tea down on your kitchen island, when your laptop started ringing.

“Ah, Cheol, give me a minute!” You spoke out loud to yourself, quickly grabbing a fork before tapping your keyboard to accept the video call coming through.

“Hi, Cheolie.” You greeted in a sing-songy voice as he -was filled up your screen with a smile on his face.

Your boyfriend was in Japan on a business trip for a few days; scheduled to come home tomorrow. You both made it a routine to have dinner together every night over video calls.

“You look pretty.” He answered, his gaze never leaving you.

You giggled at his compliment. “You see me everyday.”

Seungcheol smirked. “And? You’re always pretty.” He motioned at your bowl that was in the camera frame. “What’s for dinner today?”

“Oh, um, spicy pork bibimbap. You know; my favorite. What are you having?”

Seungcheol pointed to some things on the table he was sitting at. “Tuna and rice with some spicy sauce and vegetables, and chicken.” He let out a laugh. “Kind of boring.”

You smiled at him before taking a bite of your food. “Did you go to the gym today? I saw the workout notification on my watch.” You referenced your activity sharing feature on your Apple Watch.

“Yeah, of course the last day I'm here I find this really nice gym.” Seungcheol rolled his eyes and took a bite of his food before speaking again. “I was so excited that I actually almost did a 400 pound deadlift.”

“Oh my god…” You were just as excited for your boyfriend’s gym achievements as he was.

“Hang on, I think I took some pictures.” He picked up his phone and was scrolling through some pictures. “Yeah, see?” Seungcheol turned his phone screen towards his computer so that you could see. He scrolled through pictures of the scenery of the gym, and some pictures in the mirror.

“I like that one.” You suddenly spoke up with a smirk on your face.

“Which one?” Seungcheol questioned before looking at his phone to see the one of him completely shirtless In the mirror, showing off his back that was beautifully adorned with muscles and his tattoo that you loved so much. “Oh with the tattoo?” He smirked, knowing fully well how much you liked it.

“Yeah.” You smirked, cheeks flushing like this was the first time you saw him. Seungcheol always seemed to have that effect on you.

“I didn’t go to the gym today, I went shopping instead.” You slightly laughed.

“Yeah, I saw the Amex notification.”Seungcheol joked, setting his phone back down. “Buy anything nice?”

You gasped, dramatically covering your face. “See! That's why I don’t like using it all of the time.” Seungcheol always let you use his credit card to treat yourself however you pleased, and sometimes you would buy clothing pieces that he’d like on you. Unfortunately, the notifications always went to his phone.

Seungcheol looked at his phone again, laughing at your dramatics. “It’s not like it shows me what you bought. It just tells me the store.”

“Well you’ll be home by evening tomorrow, right?” You questioned. “I’ll show you then. It’s–“

Your voice trailed off as suddenly a notification of a text message popped up at the top of your laptop screen. It was your ex boyfriend, Min Yoongi. For some reason he has been non stop bothering you lately; asking how you’ve been, if he can “catch up” with you. You ignored every one of his advances thus far, but you hadn’t said anything to Seungcheol.

“What’s wrong?” Seungcheol instantly noticed the change in your tone and expression. “You got so quiet all of a sudden.”

You sighed. “Cheolie, I hate you fighting my battles for me.”

“It’s my job.” Seungcheol quickly retorted. “What’s going on?”

“My ex boyfriend. Do you remember Yoongi?” Seungcheol nodded. “For some reason he’s been trying to get a hold of me; texting me like he wants something between us again.”

Seungcheol got closer to his computer, the tone in his voice suddenly deepening. “Show me the texts.”

You picked up your phone, showing him the screen of multiple texts to all of which you did not respond to.

“And you didn’t respond?” He questioned, reading the texts on your phone as you swiped through.

“No, I haven’t responded to any of them.” You answered.

“Okay.” Seungcheol spoke, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms in front of himself. “I can’t get an earlier flight out. But If this happens again, I’m dealing with him.”

“Yeah, fuck yourself on my cock just like that baby.” Seungcheol sighed, looking down at his lap to where his cock was disappearing inside of your wet cunt. “Fucking use it.”

Seungcheol brushed your hair off of your shoulders for access to your collarbones; sucking and biting at your skin. You whimpered In response, combing your fingers through his dark hair and giving it a slight tug. That only egged him on more; letting out a low grunt.

Seungcheol gripped onto your hips, angling them forwards so that when you slammed down onto him, his cockhead would be hitting a different spot.

“Cheol! Fuck!” You cried out, reaching to hold onto Seungcheol’s sturdy frame before falling into his chest.

“Yeah, gonna fucking cum?” Seungcheol’s grip moved to your thighs as you whimpered; your face buried in the crook of his neck. “Look at me, look at me.”

You pulled yourself up, still using him for stability. You couldn’t fight your orgasm right now if you tried to.

Until your phone starts ringing, lost somewhere in the tangled bed sheets.

You jump, clearly startled by the ringtone playing at almost full volume.

“The fuck….?” Seungcheol muttered, eyes fixated on his wet cock disappearing in between your legs.

“Ignore it.” You hissed, lifting yourself up off of him enough so just the tip was inside of you, only to slowly sink back down to feel every inch of Seungcheol’s cock.

Seungcheol knew that was on purpose, yet he still let out one of the hottest moans to ever come out of his mouth.

“Give me that fucking phone.” Seungcheol spat, putting one arm around you to keep you in place as he rummaged around the sheets to his right.

He managed to find it despite your whining, looking to see that the screen read a phone number across it and not any caller ID.

Seungcheol shot you a glance before swiping the green icon at the bottom of the screen to pick up the call. He then put it on speaker phone.

“Who is this?” The tone in his voice was deep and oddly steady considering that you were still perched up on his lap with his cock inside of you.

“Y/N?” The voice on the other side of the phone said your name, startling you. You froze. It was Min Yoongi of all people that could be calling you.

You saw Seungcheol’s jaw clench as he heard another man say your name, but with his free hand he still gave your ass a light smack to keep moving.

“Why are you calling my girlfriend’s phone? I know who this is.” Seungcheol used his free hand to pinch one of your nipples between your fingers, making you whimper.

“I just wanted to talk…” Yoongi’s voice trailed off and you didn’t know what he said only because Seungcheol whispered to you to lie down onto your back.

You followed directions, wincing at the empty feeling between your legs when you were on your back. Seungcheol immediately pushed your knees towards your shoulders and kneeled in front of you, aligning his cock with your entrance once again.

“We can talk.” Seungcheol spoke to the phone while he was teasing your folds with the tip of his cock. You grabbed a hold the comforter with your left hand, desperate for something to hold onto.

“Cheol, fucking put it in. Please.” You whined loud enough to be heard through the phone. Seungcheol had a satisfied look on his face, nodding as he finally pushed himself inside of you slowly enough so you felt everything; all of him.

You threw your head back; arching your back against the bed. Seungcheol put his hand onto your stomach to keep you still, then moved it down slightly to stimulate your clit with his thumb. Letting out a strained moan, you nearly wanted to scream.

“Awful quiet there, Yoongi. That’s your name right?” Seungcheol’s voice was so deep that your core clenched around him tight. “What happened to talking?” You were sure that the noises of his cock sliding in and out of you could be heard on the phone by now.

“I mean, obviously I’m a bit busy right now.”

“Cheol!” Your voice startled even you. Not quite a scream, but more like a whiny moan. Seungcheol’s body was quickly against yours within mere seconds; with his weight pressing into you.

“Mhm, call out my fucking name baby.” Seungcheol’s lips ghosted over yours as he lightly kissed you, then he found your right hand that was gripping onto the comforter and laced his fingers with yours. “Let him and everyone else hear it.”

The call either dropped or your phone died because it was silent, but neither of you were paying any attention.

“Cheol! fuck!” You swore, and just like that you were cumming all over his cock; shaking as he kissed you sweetly all over your face.

Seungcheol was on the brink of cumming, and you could tell. So naturally, you used his weakness to your advantage. He always gave in when you begged him to cum inside of you; he’d never tell you no.

“Cheolie, cum in me….please.” You gripped onto his thick arms as he supported himself above you; following your words exactly as his breathing became unsteady.

“Shit…fuck.” Seungcheol panted, dropping his head and making his hair fall into his face. You couldn’t help but let out a whimper at the feeling of him finishing inside of you.

The two of you were silent, and Seungcheol adjusted himself to not drop his entire weight onto you.

“I’m sorry, cheolie.” You muttered, running your fingers through his now messy hair.

He quickly had a concerned look on his face. “For what, princess? You didn’t do anything.”

You slightly laughed at the situation. “My ex is calling me, literally while we’re having sex.”

Seungcheol was smirking. “Yeah, but he’ll probably never call again.” He grabbed your hand, kissed the back of it, then kissed your face. “He should know that you’re mine.”

☆ TAGS: @lavnderwonu @dokyeomkyeom @https-yeonjun

#seventeen smut #choi seungcheol smut #s coups smut #seungcheol x reader #seventeen x reader #s coups x reader

[osachiyo]

✧˚ 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐃𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐄𝐗 — dazai, chuuya, akutagawa, atsushi & tetchou .ೃ࿐

˚➶ 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 — female reader, n/sfw content (mdni), fluff + crack some of y'all will get second hand embarrassment, prolly the only thing i'll write about period sex, breaking the bed, spicy cunnilingus, accidental anal, reader hits her head in one of these but dw it's fine, overall just some silly stuff ! wc for each character is like 300-400 words long :) not proofread !

˚➶ 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 — i've been putting this off for too long 💀 anyways, happy reading and enjoy ! also is it tetchou or tecchou idfk how to spell this dude's name 😭

"Nghh - fuuck— you're s'good at this, angel—" Dazai moaned, encouraging you to bounce on him faster. He had you in reverse cowgirl— watching your ass bounce on his pelvis as you jumped up and down on his cock, desperately trying to chase that release you've been working for.

"Feels— feels so g-good!" You cried out, pretty nails digging into his thigh, making him let out a pornographic moan - which made you clench on him even more.

Dazai groaned, grabbing handfuls of your ass and spreading them apart to see the mouthwatering view of your cunt greedily swallowing his cock. That's when he saw little streaks of blood coating his cock - mixed with your slick and his precum... and he realized that you must be starting your period.

If Dazai was being completely honest - he didn't really care about the blood, and no way he was stopping right now— when you're riding him so deliciously and looking so fucking sexy while doing it - he'd be insane (like he isn't already) if he were to stop you now. Plus, he didn't want you to get embarrassed— no, that's the last thing he wanted.

He definitely told you after sex, though. He was like, "oh yeah, you're on your period, by the way." It kind of shocked you how casual he was about it - which he noticed, of course. He'd laugh at your bewildered face, chuckling as you ask him if he's not grossed out. He'd wave you off, "sweetheart, do you think i'm a boy? Trust me, a little bit of blood doesn't bother me."

You were about to reply when a cramp hit you straight in the guts - making you hiss out and curl into yourself in pain. Dazai frowned, quickly sitting next to you to brush your hair out of your face - "you alright, sweet girl?" You groaned in response, "mm - yeah, j-just these damn period cramps are killing me."

Dazai pretended to think for a bit, even rubbing his finger on his chin to add the extra effect, making you roll your eyes at his silly antics. he looked deep in thought for a moment until you heard him snapping his finger, pointing at you with a wink - "aha! I know exaaactly how to get rid of your cramps." Your eyebrows pinched together at his words, knowing it's gonna be something dumb.

"Let's go for another roun— oumph!" You threw a pillow at him, resulting him falling backwards on his butt. "I knew you were gonna say that!" You groaned, kicking your legs - snickering at the way he rubs his bottom. "Gosh, you are just the meanest, aren't you?" He whined - making you giggle, "oh? well, that would make you the horniest!"

"Hey! I was serious - it really works— oumph!"

You were currently face-down, ass-up on Chuuya's lavish bed— as he pushed your face further into the pillow, cunt greedily sucking his fat cock in. He didn't even bother with taking off your clothes— just ripping them and grumbling about buying you new ones when you went to protest.

"Argh— shhiiiit- takin' m-me s'well, babydoll," growling, he pulled you up by your hair - back against his chest and fuck, you could feel him in the deepest part of you - hammering inside of your puffy pussy while reaching a free hand to play with that tiny clit. "Chuuya— C-chuuya!" You squealed, face landing on the pillow with an "oof!" as he pushed you back against it. "S-shut it, fu—ck! 'yer so tight," he almost whimpered, hand untangling itself from your hair to pinch and tweak at your nipples - before landing a mean smack on your ass.

He was speeding up - almost at an inhuman pace, as the headboard continuously slammed against the wall. But the both of you failed to notice the cracking noise - too lost in the pleasure, before the bed came crashing down.

'fuck, you're doin' so good ba— whAT THE FUCK—?!" Chuuya screeched as you both fell on the floor along with the broken bed. "Shit - are you okay, baby?" He quickly checked you for any injuries— only to see that you were still dazed, your mouth agape and eyes glossed over— too cockdrunk to even process that the bed broke.

“Argh— fuck it,” he thought, just going back to pounding your cunt as if it didn’t just break down. Making his pretty girl gush all over him was way more important— and plus, he could easily buy another bed.

You scolded him after getting your back blown out. But he couldn’t care less, if he was being completely honest.

In reality, it actually turned him on even more— his new goal from now on is breaking the bed everytime while fucking - from the sheer force of it. So um.. goodluck walking..?

You were cuddled up on the couch with your boyfriend of 6 months, watching a cute movie when you suddenly felt something stiff poking against your ass— how cute, you thought - biting your lip as you ground back against him, earning a sharp gasp from Atsushi.

Things escalated from that to you being on top of him— fervently making out, shy fingers digging into the plush of your hips as you continued grinding on his dick— moaning into each other's mouths.

Eventually you ended up on your back, with Atsushi rutting into you fast and hard as you threw your head back. He was inexperienced— but you had to say, what he lacked in technique, he made up for in enthusiasm. His face was buried in your neck, letting out puffs of hot air as he suppressed the urge to bite down on your shoulder and mark you up— he didn't want to hurt or scare you off.

"Oh— god, 'sushi that feels so—" you moaned, lips parting as you silently begged for a kiss - to which he gladly complied. "Fuck— yes, s'good—!" Atsushi moaned, eyes rolling back slightly as you clamped down on him further, you were close and so was he.

But somehow, he managed to slip out of your tight cunt— making him whine and quickly try to push it back in, desperate to feel your warm walls around him again. He slipped in with some issues— it felt like you had gotten tighter but he didn't mind. Holy shit though, it felt so much warmer and tighter no— "OW OW—! ATSUSHI!"

He immediately jumped upon hearing your pained shriek, "what's wro—" "Pull out - right now!" You sneered, glaring at him as he complied. "That was the wrong hole— you idiot!" You scolded, but your gaze got softer when you saw him sulking - he didn't mean to hurt you!

"I- I'm so sorry— it just accidentally slipped out a-and then I tried to push it back in and—" he was speaking really fast, trying his best to explain himself before you put your hand up, palm against his chest.

"I get it— sorry for yelling at you," you sighed, wrapping your arms around his neck as you climbed onto his lap. He nodded, still sulking because he felt so guilty— god, he just can't do anything righ—

"Don't beat yourself up for it, okay? It wasn't your fault," you spoke as if you could read his mind, making him relax his tensed shoulders as he nodded.

..You two just decided to continue the movie and cuddle the night away.

Akutagawa had you backed up against some large shelves inside a storage room, while you two were on a mission. He'd normally prefer to have you somewhere else— somewhere more private and comfortable but you just had to be a damn tease the whole fucking day, and now he's finally got his hands on you.

"So— fucking— desperate—" each word that fell from his chapped lips were accompanied by a mean thrust, the tip of his cock brushing against that one spot inside of your walls. He had you completely trapped against the large set of shelves with rashōmon— leaving you with no ways to escape him. "Haah— d-did a little bending g-get you this worked u-up?" You added fuel to the fire— making his right eye twitch in annoyance, what a lousy mouth you had.

He said nothing, though— only speeding his pace up, as heavy breaths and pants left him— an unusual flush spread across his cheeks. "You really— shit!— d-don't know when to shut the fuck up," he growled, as a pale hand found your tits— slapping the jiggling fat before landing a harsh slap to each.

Your back arched with each pound of his hips into your gooey cunt— both of you feeling lightheaded from the pleasure circulating through your veins. So lightheaded in fact, you both somehow failed to notice the heavy book on top one of the shelves inching closer and closer towards the very edge— a small impact against the wood would most likely make it fall.

"oh— AkuOWW—!" And fall it did— right on top of your head before it bounced off and fell on the floor. You yelled in pain, the dull pain making you head throb. Akutagawa just...paused— eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights. He didn't know what to say— should he ask if you're okay? He's never been good at this stuff — so he just.. kinda... stood there and stared.

Made sure you're alright after he was over the initial shock, though — telling you that you should've seen it coming, earning him a few curses from you.

Tetchou had you spread on the couch, strong hands holding your thighs against your chest, giving him a perfect view of the soaked cunt he was about to devour.

"You look so pretty between my legs," you cooed, running your fingers through his burgundy locks. "Yeah? Well, I wish you could see my view, gorgeous girl," he spoke while nibbling the insides of your thighs— placing sloppy, open mouthed kisses wherever his lips could reach. His face was lightly flushed pink — your praises always made him hot and bothered, it encouraged him to do even better — make you feel even better.

A small moan caught in your throat when your boyfriend slowly peeled away the slick-soaked panties from your juicy cunt, pulling them down your legs before flinging them off somewhere. The cold night air hitting your bare sex made you try to clench your thighs back together — but to no avail, as Tetchou kept them apart firmly. He felt himself salivating at the sight of your exposed cunt — wanting to dive right in.

And dive right in he did, licking a fat stripe up your cunt, collecting your juices on his tongue before smearing them all over your clit, feeling your thighs shake and tummy clench at the stimulation. "Don't hold them back f'me," he let out a muffled grunt. "Your moans — don't hold 'em back," he clarified, before shamelessly shaking his head back and forth on your cunt — causing you to arch your back as your fingers tightened their grip on his hair.

"A-ah, Tetchou—" you threw your head back with a whine, trying to lift your hips up to grind into his mouth, to which he responded to by pushing you even further into the couch, "don't move," he panted, basically growling into your pussy. He couldn't help but hump into the couch — way too turned on by your pleasure.

It was all going great — amazing even, until you felt a light burn on your cunt, confusion lacing all your features. It didn't take long for the burning sensation to build up — the pleasure slowly disappearing, as discomfort kicked in.

"W-wait — Tetchou," you panted, trying to pull his head away from your aching (literally) cunt. Tetchou only growled in response, latching onto your pussy harder — you knew better than to interrupt him during a meal.

But it fucking burned! So you just yelled out, "it burns!" And felt him immediately pause — slowly lifting his head from the spot between your thighs and looking utterly confused, "what?"

"I — I don't know, but my pussy fucking burns," you snapped, worry laced all over your features.

Then suddenly, a look of realization mixed with mortification fills your boyfriend's face. You cocked an eyebrow at him, "what is it?"

"... I forgot I ate those... spicy noodles and... some of the sauce was probably still on my lips...."

©sachiyoh— do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, reblogs are very appreciated♡

tags ・ @hopefulpain @inkmooon @constant-existential-terror @nda-approval @mellieellie @seiiushi @lynxxyyy @kentopedia

@sorasushik1 @himebwrries @nopethenope @neviex @fyodorisbbg @stygianoir @saharei @x-lunawrites-x @munnaitorei @emyyy007 @dearhoney-31 @the-foreigner @angoisfine @osaemu @honeycombflowers-blog @yuiiasathesilly @kaithegremlin @sukiischaotic @squigglewigglewoo @cupidszvlvr @ashthemadwriter-archived @bloobewy @mrs-bakugou @hauntedsol @ask-me-or-not @hanakotateyama @kissesmellow21 @dazaichuuya69 @xxsilverjackalxx @gettinshiggywithit @deaths-presence @sugaredpersimmon @rjssierjrie @iheartpieck @angelof-darkness @dazaisimpletmereadfanficspls @hellokitty-4-lele @scinclaitnoir @aly-insanity @kemis-world @bisexuawolfsalt @thateldribitch

#౨ৎ — archive・ #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader smut #bungo stray dogs crack #bsd crack #bsd x reader crack #bsd x reader smut #bsd smut #bsd x reader #dazai smut #dazai x reader #dazai x reader smut #chuuya smut #chuuya x reader smut #chuuya x reader #atsushi x reader #atsushi smut #atsushi x reader smut #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa x reader smut #akutagawa smut #tetchou x reader #tetchou smut #tetchou x reader smut #bungou stray dogs #dazai x reader fluff #dazai fluff #bsd fluff

[something-about-sunflowers]

ALRIGHT, *cracks knuckles* let's get into that teaser, shall we?

Should I itemize this? I think I'm going to itemize it lmao.

So:

Starting here because this is a baseline for Stede, he's got no neckerchief here. This is likely early in the season, probably the very start.

Man's got a fuckin' ARM.

This is Ed. You can see the bare right arm in both shots.

Red neckerchief. Ed's scrap of silk? Beat to shit if it is, which, he did toss it out to sea so, it would be.

Ed's not wearing the knee brace. Or gloves for that matter. I know the knee brace being an actual mobility aid is unconfirmed canon/fanon but it does make me :(c to see him without it. Either it wasn't actually considered as a mobility aid or he's lost it like he's lost his gloves OR he's going without it because he doesn't care if it hurts.

Closer shot of the neckerchief.

I just wanted to point out all the knives stabbed into the table. Also, those look like bits of paper on the windows, did they keep some of the books to repurpose for window blocking purposes?

THERE HE IS!!!!!!!! Other people have already pointed out the makeup and his ring still on his tie, along with the whip on his hip cjizzy real. He's got a new baldric but I also think his clothes look. Darker? Than in season 1? This is a darker/heavier contrast setting but it carries into other shots of him too I think? Like they're less sun/saltwater faded or something?

Other thing to note: If I have my orientation right, this is to the right of Stede's bed nook and to the left of the library, which means this shelf is the one with the auxiliary wardrobe opening mechanism. Which I bring up because:

This little guy seems to be in the place of the mannequin. Ed kept the auxiliary wardrobe and gothed up the mannequin to justify it still being there.

SO much here. This is, I'm fairly certain, Benjamin Hornigold. This camp he's set up (along with what he's wearing) looks like it was made out of a shipwreck. Ed's barefoot and missing his jacket and gloves, and his shirt's torn up at the sleeves. Definitely where he washed up from his dip in the ocean.

Note the trees and the lighting, that comes up later. Ed shoots here and Ben moves with the shot but it doesn't look like he was actually HIT by it to my eyes.

'Wanted. |Blackbeard| Villainous Pirate. Murderer, thrice over. $400 Reward for the criminal responsible for: theft - brigandry - larceny - arson - tax evasion ➡' Presumably there are more crimes/info on the back, though we see the reverse side in the next cut and it's either blank or all in very small text, I couldn't quite tell.

The poster to the right says 'Port' something which has me wondering Port Royal but that's just the only 'Port' something I know, could def be somewhere else.

(Also, just for fun:

Here's how much abouts Ed's capture would be worth now.)

Wider pic than it needs to be but I didn't wanna cut out Olu lol. ANYWAY. Neckerchief again. Also the back of the poster, see what I mean about it either being blank or very tiny?

Babygirl. . . But also that Bride Ed figure kinda slays. Little bralette with the midriff showing, I see you Babygirl. When will he be allowed to just rest and do silly little crafts WITHOUT heartbreak looming over him?

Well. Four is not nine. So. There's that. The other five could be used or out of frame though, of course.

OH. He's back to his fingerless gloves! They might actually be different from his original ones though, they look different at the wrist to me, not quite sure though.

The BOYS!!!! Frenchie looks like he's having a GREAT time. Considering he suggested they turn the hostage into a table and complained about the Republic of Pirates being a bit gentrified I'd say this is more in line with what he's used to in piracy. I 100% buy he was going along with Stede's way because he knew it was an easy ride compared to real piracy. This wouldn't necessarily be a return to form for him but definitely something he's more used to? And he gets to be kitty :3c

And FANG!!! Look at him showing a bit more skin!! Good for him!!

Everybody say 'Thank You David Jenkins'. Right now. Look at this Mad Max shit. Fuckin' Imperator Jimenez right there. LOVE that tye added the 'beard' after the 'fuck's wrong with your face?' bit in 1x10. Full 'it looked weird on you but I slay' energy.

Jim

Izzy

Fang

Near as I can tell at least. I can't make out if Frenchie is in the shot and I'm pretty positive Ed isn't cause he stayed by the cake when they charged in.

Man, yknow I know we were all kinda clowning on it a bit at the end of 1x10 but this look really is so JARRING. Like, in the dark it's menacing but in the light? It's unhinged and that reads as more dangerous imo.

Also just for comparison's sake the pre-Ed-ified version of the bride figure. He really did full on customize that thing lol.

I DON'T THINK ANNE KISSED STEDE HERE. It feels out of character of the show to pull the 'It's fine if a woman does it to a man' kind of thing with regard to unwanted kissing. This is the frame the scene starts on in the trailer. She's leaning back from him and isn't nearly close enough to his mouth to say for certain that's where she was coming from. My money is on her leaning in to whisper something into his ear, maybe under the guise of it being an advance/intended kiss, which would also explain the annoyed look when she's interrupted. She either got ACTUALLY interrupted or it's part of the act. Stede doesn't look nearly as uncomfortable as he would be if she'd kissed him or tried to, he looks confused.

Izzy going for his sword when this guy tries to get the drop on Stede. He either is starting to care or he knows how much Ed needs him alive.

Also, this is the other potential source of Stede's neckerchief. Mr, Knife right here has a red one and Stede doesn't have it in this scene. I do think this one is a little less distressed than the one Stede has though so it could just be coincidence.

See? No neckerchief. He DOES have a sword at his hip tho! So this, I think, is after Izzy's started training him.

Also, he actually looks really good in red lol.

Baby. He's definitely missing the ring in this shot. It sits higher than the baldric is covering. I want to give him a little kissie on his ouchie and then let him have a nap, he needs that.

The pants match the coat. Also, black shirt. Stede is kinda slaying ngl.

Still missing her head :(c. Isn't that bad luck?

Maybe yall didn't hear me properly with the Jim pic. I'll repeat:

EVERYBODY SAY 'THANK YOU DAVID JENKINS'.

I can't get over how Stede's just standing there politely with his arms behind his back lmfao.

Also, Izzy's got his right leg up, he's putting his weight on his left. . . 'foot'.

I SAID EVERYBODY SAY-

I know tits and all but also. The belly. I would like to. Bite.

*ahem*

ANYWAY. On the left (our left) side of the barrel you can see the tip of his right boot so he's def got that leg off the ground. Perhaps someone is trying to relearn their footwork? Now that they've got a different balance than they're used to? And perhaps a difference in sensory input in the leg he's standing on? Possibly?

This is the same beach Ed was on when he did the fuckin' RAD takedown of the other officer but it definitely looks like different times of day. Having both in the teaser is def meant to be a red herring. He doesn't have the neckerchief in this shot either.

Bra för honom. (Is how google translate tells me you say 'Good for him' in Swedish.)

Is Jackie's hair the same here as it is in the VF pic with Ed? Or like, similar enough to be a 'later in the day after some Fun™ messing it up a bit'?

Roach!!! Fully sleeveless now, added a belt, got some flowers tied to the strings/straps of his apron. Looks like he's having fun lighting that cannon lol. Pretty sure this is the same scene as that one leaked photo of him dancing with Fang and Izzy's green screen sock. He had the flowers in that, right?

[Ran out of allowed images, please hold]

#the dork is being a dork #ofmd #ofmd 2 #ofmd s2 #ofmd season 2 #our flag means death #our flag means death 2 #our flag means death s2 #our flag means death season 2 #ofmd spoilers #ofmd 2 spoilers #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd season 2 spoilers #our flag means death spoilers #our flag means death 2 spoilers #our flag means death s2 spoilers #our flag means death season 2 spoilers #stede bonnet #edward teach #izzy hands #benjamin hornigold #oluwande boodhari #frenchie ofmd #fang ofmd #jim jimenez #anne bonny #the revenge #spanish jackie #the swede ofmd #roach ofmd

[cinnbar-bun]

Would you be willing to write what kind of fan would ace, sabo, shanks, and law for the reader!! I loved your last one!!!

You got it dude! Sorry for taking so long.

Ace, Sabo, Law, and Shanks- Reversed AU HCs

AU: In which YOU are the character of a very famous franchise, and they are regular people who are fans of your series.

Note: GN!Reader, crack, very unserious, SFW

Part 1 with Straw Hats here!

Ace

Broke ass guy who can’t afford anything for you minus like, a bootleg or something small. Has buttons of you. 

Highkey think he would be a menace and just wear something so off with you on it (you are free to decide what that looks like). 

If people ask why he’s got you on his phone or like a keychain of you, he just beams and responds that you’re the love of his life and refuses to elaborate. 

Lies, he WILL be elaborating and making it everyone’s problem. 

Marco wants him to shut up about it. 

Thatch jokes around often and makes cakes of you for Ace on his birthday or something. Ace refuses to eat it for like two seconds before he’s quickly trying to fight off the others from taking a slice. 

Whitebeard has not realized you’re fictional and still asks about meeting you soon… he just wants to meet the one his son keeps raving about. 

Ace has to lie and it becomes a whole ‘my partner is in Canada, actually they can’t see you now.’ 

Whitebeard is so impressed with the fact you travel all over the world <3 wow, you must be so worldly! 

Sabo 

Rich boy who I don’t think would directly get merchandise of you, but he would totally buy things that have your signature color or remind him of you. Very subtle things. I could see him buying one expensive figure of you, but otherwise it’s just subtle things he will proudly wear in public. 

Doesn’t have much time for gaming, so I don’t think he would be playing the mobile gacha games but he will admire the artwork and units of you. 

This is actually a partial truth, he had them at one point but was sinking so much money into your units that Koala had to step in and get him to stop this addiction. 

He’s been doing his best okay… but your alt unit is so tempting he wants to GET IT HE NEEDS TO GET IT LET HIM ROLL ONE MORE ONE MORE ONE MORE- 

Sabo’s phone is now under parental controls and he needs Koala or Dragon’s permission to download or buy any in-app purchases. 

But he’s like, so normal about this, okay? He doesn’t have a problem.

Likes to eat your favorite snacks or food on your birthday as a sort of ‘celebration’ of you. Again, pretty subtle things like buying a dessert you like from that one bakery, or ordering a meal that you ate one time on the show. 

On second thought I could see him having special editions of the manga, but that remains in his office never to be borrowed by anyone. 

Law 

“Why the hell would I be into this?” 

Acts like he’s above watching cringe animes when he’s got better taste in his consumption of media like House MD or Scrubs or something. 

But you know, he’s always getting dragged into silly shit with his friends so everyone is forcing him to watch this popular anime with over 1000+ episodes. 

Law feels like performing surgery on himself with no anesthesia at the sheer number of episodes. 

It isn’t until like 400 episodes in when you’re introduced and everyone swears they can see the light in his eyes return and he’s entranced. 

Suddenly this is his favorite show, although he refuses to entertain that. 

He totally has a few figures of you, but when asked, he just yells that they’re Bepo’s and he’s keeping them safe. 

The others know he’s not going to buy merch so they just buy him silly trinkets of you and he tries to keep lowkey and hidden so no one knows about his love for you. 

He’s not the same man he was 400 episodes ago. He still can’t decide if that’s a good thing or a bad one. 

But you’ve invaded and latched yourself into his mind and damn it, he’ll keep you there. 

Shanks 

Cringe but free. 

Buggy got him into this show (Buggy made a slip up once and has tried to deny that he’s liked this series since) and Shanks casually watches a few episodes when he’s free. 

Has a couple of figures that a kid Uta always wants to play with (hell no, put that shit back!!!) 

Lies to Uta whenever she asks who this figure is of and he dramatically will hold the figure of you and tell her this is, in fact, who her other parent is. 

Great job, Shanks, you weirdo. Of course, Uta knows when she’s older that he’s lying out of his ass, but when she was younger she was deadset on meeting you. 

So Shanks was forced to include her in his watches so she can see her ‘other parent’. Shanks makes wild stories when Uta asks why you’re in the TV and says you’re so so cool they just had to make a tv show about you. 

He’s the kind of guy who forgets Uta is a kid and whenever something super violent or adult happens, he goes ‘oops’ after a few seconds and shoddily covers her eyes, to the point she can pretty much still see everything. 

So both of them kinda get in a feedback loop where when he gets something, she wants it, and when she wants to do something, he’ll do it when it comes to you. 

You are a staple in that household. Shanks isn’t the best at maintaining your figures but he does remember to dust you off once in a while (mostly after Uta screams at him to keep it in good condition). 

He’s tried to get into the card game (Uta insisted), but he finds the rules too hard and difficult, so him and Uta made an easier version (which he often lies about to be able to win). 

His luck is crappy too when it comes to the blind packs, so when Uta got the rare card of you he was practically gonna wrestle it out of her. 

He’s also weird and rich enough to get any crazy or out there merchandise of you if he felt like it.

#one piece #one piece x reader #x reader #reader insert #one piece hcs #trafalgar law x reader #trafalgar law #shanks x reader #red haired shanks #shanks #portgas ace x reader #portgas d ace #ace x reader #ace #sabo #sabo x reader

[jqhotchner]

hsnews

3,678 Likes

hsnews @/harrystyles seen walking with mystery woman

View all 467 comments

harryfan1 who is she?

harryfan3 how do we even know this is harry?! ya’ll think any tall person is potentially harry styles

harryfan6 the height difference 🥹

harryfan7 how do you guys not know about yn?

| harryfan2 @harryfan7 im saying?! theyve been dating for like three years. how to people not know this?

harryfan10 she’s literally his girlfriend. harry just doesn’t post her. which is valid considering they’re both private people. she’s not even famous!

| harryfan37 @harryfan10 exactly. like, the little girl he was talking about three shows ago was their daughter. funny how people didn’t know this

| harryfan1 @harryfan37 rue, when was this?!

| harryfan37 @harryfan1 it’s her daughter from a previous marriage. we don’t know much just that the guy wasn’t a good person and isn’t involved in her life. but harry’s stepped up and i believe it’s even a video of her calling him dad. it’s so fucking cute!

harryfan22 crazy how most of his fans are just now finding out harrys a whole ass dad! like, i thought we found this out last year?!?!

| harryfan40 @harryfan22 im—like her account is private and everything! but apparently like three fans follow her and she’s occasionally post old photos of her and her daughter! i think one of them even said it’s a few photos of harry with their daughter. like our pookie is a dad 🥺

hsnews

3,440 Likes

hsnews harry tonight

View all 433 comments

harryfan1 now knowing he’s a dad it makes so much sense how he’s been looking extra dilfy the last few years. wtf 😳

harryfan20 oh the outfit choices have been the best this tour

harryfan66 i need him to need me

harryfan33 what about yn?

harryfinedine was yn in the crowd?

harryedstyles im so invested in this whole ynxdadrry information

hsnews guys, i do not know anything about yn. i just found out myself, i swear! like its fucking crazy

harryfan30

4,670 Likes

harryfan30 this is an old pap photo but she does get papped sometimes. it’s why it’s so shocking that people don’t know about her! like fans even stop her when they see her. yn is so unbelievably pretty. anyway, this is our mom 🥹

View all 400 comments

harryfan2 omfg she’s so gorgeous 😍

user3 shes dating that ugly man?! she could pass for a model and shes dating harry fugly styles?!?!

| harryfan1 @user3 trash people with trash opinions are so fucking lame. i swear!

harryfan55 crazy how this is just now coming out?! i do not buy it one bit. this shit is basic pr

| harryfan30 @harryfan55 you can literally scroll through @harrynews post and eventually find photos from two years ago. it’s not just coming out of nowhere 🙄

| harrynews @harryfan55 ill even tag you in a few posts if that helps. yn and harry aren’t some stunt. she rarely gets papped unless with harry himself and that’s still very rare

#jqhotchner #jqhotchner masterlist #harry styles x black!reader #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry smut #harry styles fake ig #harry styles x fem!reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagine #galaxy jqhotchner

[mrwavellswaps]

The Transfer Auction 1 - Vince

Once every month, late on the first Sunday evening, an auction would be held. But this was no ordinary auction. It was held at a secret location that only few knew about. Those people were either those that were extremely wealthy or those who were brought to the auction to ‘compete’. It took place in a rather large showroom with a huge luxurious stage at front. There were multiple rows of chairs seated before the stage, many of which were already filled by those eager for the show to start. As this was the men’s auction, naturally the entire crowd was made of rich men. The kind of rich you’d be able to sense at a single glance. High end tailored suits, designer clothes, expensive watches. The type of men that could spend thousands and hardly bat an eye. And yet, because of its unique and fascinating nature, this auction had drawn them all here. Because at this auction they could buy something they wouldn’t be able to buy anywhere else. So naturally when the lights dimmed, the crowd erupted with applause while a man made his way to the left side of the stage where the podium sat.

“Good evening everyone! My name is Gavin Alexander and I’ll be your host for the night!” He announced via the microphone.

“I can’t help but notice just how many of you there are so I suppose it’s only appropriate for me to say that this is a private event. AKA don’t be telling any poor folk about where we’re situated.” He laughed, getting a chuckle out of the small crowd. “But seriously, don’t. If we have to deal with the public then that means less fun for all of us!” He added, to which the audience murmured in agreement. “However, with that out of the way, let’s get this show started!” The crowd applauded once more as the stage lit up with spotlights, preparing for what was to come.

Moments later a group of ten men came onto stage, all in nothing but tight speedo and a number so that nothing was left to the imagination. The men varied slightly in age with the youngest looking around 20 years old and the oldest seeming to be in his 40’s. They also varied in height, appearance and race but the one thing that remained consistent throughout all ten men was that they were in great shape. Some of them were huge bodybuilder size, some were super lean with defined abs while others sat somewhere in between. Regardless, they were hunks to say the least.

The host walked over towards the first man in line. “As some of you may already know, this first group of men are our professionals. This means they’ll have a few guidelines which they’ll share with you as we proceed. After this our second group of men will be our criminal group who’ve been ordered to take part in addition to their sentences. As such these men don’t have the luxury of setting guidelines and so everything is up for grabs with them.” He stated clearly with a wide smile before making his way across the stage to the first hunk in line. “Now, to our first professional of the night, Mr Chase Adams! What are your terms?” He asked

“Well I’m cool with transferring muscle, body fat, hair and all that stuff. Only things that are off the table for me I’d say are genitals and anything to do with my face.” Chase listed off and as soon as he did the bidding began at around 400 grand. Many of the spectators eager to win a chance to ‘transfer’ with the well proportioned, fair skinned hunk. But one man in the crowd wasn’t the least bit interested in Chase.

Vince Hamlin. He wore a casual grey suit that hugged his lean form and honestly made him seem a little underdressed when compared to some of the other men in the audience. He was easily identifiable by his bald head while also keeping a nicely trimmed beard that framed his handsome looks perfectly. Vince sighed as he waited for the bidding of Chase to come to a close. The quicker they got to the sixth man in line, the better. Number six was only one Vince really had his eye on.

For the next half an hour or so Vince sat either on his phone or using his bidding paddle as a fan while he waited. Watched as the host defended down the line of hunks. The one after Chase was an asian man who had the face of a super model with an incredible swimmer's body. After him was another white dude who was the smallest of the bunch and prided himself on being so thin and lean. Vince couldn’t help noticing how more of the overweight men in the crowd began bidding once the guy mentioned body fat transferral was on the table. At last however he found himself sitting up a little straighter when the host finally approached the sixth man in line.

“Next up is Mr Darius Crawford and by the looks of it he’s our biggest man here tonight! But before we start fighting over him, what are your terms Mr Crawford?” He asked the hunk.

Just as the host had said, Darius was easily the largest contestant out of the group. He was huge all over with massive imposing muscles along with rich ebony skin and dark hair, not to mention being incredibly tall. Some of the gay men in the crowd were practically drooling at his mere presence, Vince included though he tried to hide it. “For me, the things that are off limits are my genitals, my race and my age in either direction. Besides that everything else is up for grabs.” He spoke with a deep, masculine tone into the mic before giving a thumbs up to the audience.

“You heard him folks!” The host said as he turned towards the audience again. “Now how about we start the bidding at… let’s say Six Hundred Grand? That sound fair Darius?” He turned back towards the bodybuilder who gave a satisfactory nod. “Six Hundred Grand it is!”

Right away people in the crowd began raising their paddles. 650K, 700K, 800K, 950K! The number kept rising and it was no surprise considering Darius seemed to be the grand prize of tonight’s professional selection. Just as the numbers were reaching the mid one millions however, Vince raised his paddle and shouted “Four Million!” There were a few glances in his direction, people slightly surprised at the sudden jump in bid.

“Going once!” The host beamed in Damian’s direction. “Going Twice!” He added. “Any more bid’s!? This is your last chance! Goin-” before he could finish he was interrupted by another bidder.

“Five Million!” Shouted a 60-something year old man.

“Seven Million!” Another one screamed with his paddle in the air.

“Twelve Million!!!” One more chimed in.

These bidders were persistent. More so than Vince had expected. Then again most of them are middle aged dudes with far too much money on their hands so he should’ve anticipated this. What he’d thought might’ve scared the other bidders off had only made them more desperate as the numbers only went into higher and higher millions. And so with a big sigh he threw his paddle up again and shouted “TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY MILLION!!!”

The host and the audience were stunned. “T-two hundred and fifty… million? I don’t think we’ve ever had a bid that high on one person before.” The host muttered before quickly trying to regain his composure. “Going once!” He began. “Going Twice! Any last competitor’s?!” There was a brief moment of silence and… nothing. “Sold! To the handsome gentleman in the grey suit!” He announced proudly with wonder in his voice.

Damian practically fell back into his seat, grateful that he didn’t have to increase his bid any higher. “Fuck this had better be worth it…” he grumbled to himself before resigning to sit through the remaining men on stage.

After that the bidding returned to normal. The host continued down the line of remaining hunks on the stage as each of them sold for a decent price around a million or so but none bothered to bid much higher. After all, everyone could tell Darius was the biggest prise to be won, literally, and Damian had already secured that bag. And so it wasn’t long before the tenth and final man in line was sold meaning the show could continue on to its next phase.

“Alright everyone! That’s all of our professionals tonight!” The host announced. “They’ll all be ready and waiting for those of you that one the bids but before that we have our second wave of men!” With that the professional made their way off stage to make room for the next group. Moments later ten more men were escorted on stage by the security. Like the professionals they were clad in nothing but speedos however, unlike the professionals, not all of them had huge sculpted physiques to show off. Two of them had decently impressive bodies but the rest varied. Some of them just looked average while a couple were slightly overweight. One of them was just a straight up bear with how huge and hairy he was. “Here we have tonight’s criminal selection! As previously mentioned these are men who’ve been ordered to be here by the court as part of their sentences which means anything is up for grabs!” It wasn’t surprising to Vince that this group had to be practically dragged on stage. There was no way in hell they wanted to be here but then again it was their own faults…

The bidding began with the host introducing the first criminal in line but Vince wasn’t the least bit interested. He’d already gotten what he came for so he pretty much just zoned out for the rest of the bidding. Most of the criminals had much lower starting bids than the professionals due to them not being in quite as peak physical condition. The two fittest men out of the group certainly had the highest bids to begin with them both starting at 100K. The bearish man however, though his starting bid was relatively low at around 40K, the audience got surprisingly competitive. In the end he was sold for a whopping Eight Million. Vince supposed some people in the crowd were quite eager to look a little more butch…

Eventually the tenth man of the criminal group was sold, much to Vince and every other winner’s delight. “And with that, the bidding part of tonight’s event comes to close!” The host stated. “Those of you who won the bids, please allow members of our staff to escort you to where you need to be. Everyone else feel free to help yourselves to the buffet. There’s plenty of food and drinks that are all on the house as a thank you from us for attending tonight!”

Vince got up from his chair and made his way over towards a group of staff with the other winners. The staff checked the numbers and each winner’s paddle to make sure everything was in order. Once that was taken care of they were led through a pair of double doors and down a long corridor with ten rooms on each side. Rooms 1A and 1B came first, on the left and right of the corridor respectively. The winner of the first professional bid was taken into 1A while the winner of the first criminal bid was taken into 1B. This pattern continued down the hallway with winners being taken into rooms that corresponded with whichever bid they’d won until they finally reached rooms 6A and 6B.

“Right this way sir.” One of the staff kindly ushered Vince towards 6A while the remaining winners continued down the hallway. Once inside he was shocked by the large futuristic looking machine that took up most of the room. It was a massive device that was connected to two chairs, both of which seemed to have some kind of helmet above them that was directly wired to the machine. He’d never seen anything quite like it… and they had at least twenty of these things?? It was only then that he finally noticed Darius, the gigantic hunk he’d won in the bid. He’d been sat patiently waiting since the professional bid ended and was eager to get up and greet Vince.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr…?” Darius began, holding out a large hand.

“Mr Hamlin. But you can just call me Vince.” The rich man responded before shaking Darius’s hand. “So I assume you’ve done this before?”

“Once yeah. A couple years ago.” Darius confirmed. “It didn’t hurt or anything. You just feel a bit weird for a while after as you try to adjust.” He explained rather nonchalantly. “And thank you by the way. I never imagined someone would bid that much for me. I know the organisers take 40% but that’s still one hundred and fifty million my way… I can’t thank you enough.”

Vince smirked as his eyes scanned over the hulking man’s form once again. “Your body is all the thanks I need.” He then turned his attention to the staff in the room with them. “So what’s next?” He asked. The staff explained that all they needed to do now was agree on what was being transferred. After that they just needed to get seated and the machine would do the rest.

“So what’s it gonna be?” The hunk prompted, taking a couple steps back to allow Vince a chance to take in everything that was up for offer.

“Your muscle. I want as much of it as you can give.” Vince didn’t hesitate for a second. He knew exactly what he wanted and who could blame him. Darius was a monster with how massive he was. “It’s always been a dream of mine to be huge like you. I’ve worked out a lot over the years but I’ve always struggled to put on any decent size. But now… suddenly it’s all possible.” Vince had to try and stop himself from salivating over the pure adonis before him. If he hadn’t been imagining having all that muscle for himself, he’d have been picturing himself fucking Darius’s huge muscle ass instead. If he didn’t have so much restraint he’d certainly have a boner right now.

Darius didn’t mind the lustful stares the other man was giving him. He wasn’t gay but, with how much this guy was paying him, he couldn’t really complain. “Yeah I figured you’d say that. I am pretty huge huh?” He gave one of arms a quick flex. “Was there anything else you had in mind?”

Vince thought about it for a second as he looked up at the giant before him. That’s when it hit. “How about some of your height as well? I’m 5’10 but I’ve always wanted to know what it feels like to be over 6 foot and you look like you’ve got plenty to spare.”

He wasn’t wrong. Last he’d checked Darius was about 6’5 and was usually one of, if not, *the* tallest man in a room. “Depends. How much you thinkin’?”

“How does 5 inches sound?”

Darius went back and forth in his head for a moment. 5 inches wasn’t too much right? He’d still be about 6 foot afterwards… “Alright, fine. 5 inches. But no more!” Darius put his foot down on that. He might’ve been getting paid a lot but he wasn’t about to drop down to 5’11 or below. He was a tall fucker and he wanted it to stay that way. Thankfully Vince seemed more than satisfied with that.

Just then some of the staff chimed in. “Alright so we’ve got 5 inches of height and as much muscle as can be safely transferred. Is there anything else you want to request, Mr Hamlin?” Some of them were already inputting settings into the machine regarding his previous requests.

Vince thought for a second. Tall and muscular, what more could he want? He was about to say that was all until his eyes nestled onto Darius’s bulge. “Well… I know on stage you said it was off limits but I was wondering…”

“Nope. Not happening.” Darius didn’t even need to hear the rest to know exactly what Vince was about to ask. “Sorry man. My girl doesn’t care how huge and buff I am but she loves my big dick. Can’t help you I’m afraid.”

For a moment Vince thought of offering Darius a little extra money in exchange but he could tell just by the look on the hunks face that it wasn’t going to happen. Or at least Darius wasn’t going to agree with it anyway. Luckily for Vince he had a backup plan… “Oh alright. Just muscle and height it is.” He waved his hands about a little before turning to the staff. “I suppose we’re ready now.”

Once all was decided both Darius and Vince were made to sign a few documents confirming that they both consented to the transfer and that Vince would pay his fee afterwards or would be reprimanded accordingly. And once that was taken care of, they were taken back over to the machine…

As the pair of them were getting strapped into the chairs however, Vince whispered to the man that was doing his chair. “Hey. I’ve got a deal for ya.” As quickly and quietly as possible, Vince proposed that he would give the man and his co-workers in the room a hefty amount of money if they agreed to transfer some of Darius dick size to him. The man gave him an awkward look for a second, his moral compass clearly being challenged, but soon enough he agreed.

Before long both Vince and Darius had the helmets placed on their heads, ready for the transfer. It took quite a while for the machine to actually boot up. Vince could only assume this was due to the staff members negotiating the deal he’d offered. He could only hope they’d make the right decision. Eventually there was a loud engine-like sound as the machine roared to life. For a moment Vince didn’t feel anything besides the buzzing of the huge device behind him so he was taken by surprise when a bolt of energy from the helmet came surging through his body. It was an almost indescribable feeling, as though he was being filled with electricity but instead of being frying him to a crisp it was energising him instead! It felt… exhilarating! So much so that he didn’t even realise the transfer was already taking place.

Slowly but surely Darius’s muscle mass began to decrease. His arms getting smaller, his huge chest deflating, his legs shrinking. With every second that passed he lost more and more size. All of that muscle he’d worked tirelessly to gain swiftly vanished along with all the strength that came along with it. All of it being converted into pure energy that was processed by the machine. Before long Darius was a far cry of his former self, looking thin lanky rather than imposing.

Of course all that energy had to go somewhere and that place was Vince. As soon as the machine had finished absorbing Darius’s muscle, it began pumping all of that energy into Vince’s body. He felt it immediately. A burgeoning power growing inside him. Gradually his body started to inflate with new muscle. His biceps and triceps expanding with newfound size as his back and chest started to broaden. Even his thighs and calves began to thicken significantly by the second. Before long ripping sounds could be heard coming from Vince’s suit.

His jacket was the first to give in as the sleeves started to tear under the pressure of his growing shoulders and biceps. The sound alone was music to his ears. Vince couldn’t actually see what was going on due to the helmet but the tearing of his clothes was a good indicator of how big he was getting! His upper body continued to broaden and expand, causing his jacket to pretty much explode apart at this point, revealing the already ripping shirt underneath which no doubt wouldn’t last long. But before it had the chance, his quads had the honour of bursting through his suit pants in all their glory, their sheer mass not wanting to be contained any longer. And not a moment later the top button on his pants came flying off as well as his hips and waist grew thicker. But not as thick as his ass. Vince’s once average butt ballooned to a colossal size, practically elevating him in his chair with its mass and giving him a nice round bubble butt just like Darius once had. Soon after he couldn’t help but let out a grunt as his chest heaved forwards, two massive pecs forming at last and being the final straw that caused his shirt to tear apart at last.

But of course just because Vince’s clothes were in tatters didn’t mean the growth was about to stop there. His body kept expanding, growing even larger with muscle. His thighs had grown so thick that it was impossible for them to not rub against one another. And that’s not to mention how ridiculously swole his upper body now looked. By the time the machine had finally run out of energy to pump into Vince’s body, his muscles looked engorged with unbelievable size and strength. No wonder since it was cramming all the muscle of a 6’5 man into 5’10 body. He was so swole now he’d hardly be able to move properly. But of course that had been accounted for and was about to change with the next transfer.

The machine returned its attention to Darius once again, sucking even more energy out of him. Only this time instead of taking his muscle, it was slowly shrinking his body in another way. His limbs and torso all diminished until his height had reduced its way down to 6 foot exactly. On the plus side for Darius, his body didn’t look quite lanky now as it had moments ago.

Of course once this was done the energy was once again redirected towards Vince. He felt the energy filling him once again, only this time it felt a little different. Instead of expanding, he felt himself stretching out instead! His arms and legs all grew longer as his height increased, finally coming to a haunt once Vince reached an impressive 6’3. Simultaneously the muscle he’d gained moments prior was now able to spread itself out a little bit better across his larger frame.

Now was the moment of truth. Had that bribe been enough to get Vince the last thing he wanted? There was silence for a moment as if the staff were still debating amongst themselves on what to do. For a second Vince was worried his little plan had failed. That is until the machine roared to life one more time…

“Hey uhhh… sorry you two but we just need to make sure there’s no ummm… imbalance between you two before we shut this thing down.” Said a voice over the speaker.

Darius was of course none the wiser but Vince knew exactly what that meant. Slowly and carefully so that he wouldn’t notice, the machine started sucking more energy out of Darius. Unbeknownst to the professional, his penis was gradually getting smaller until it had lost about 3 inches of its size. When the machine turned on Vince however, it made the transfer nice and fast. Within second he felt his cock inflate, going from an average 5 inch cock to an impressive 8 incher with some added girth to top it off. The rich, conniving man couldn’t help but grin maliciously.

A few minutes later the transfer machine was powered down properly before the staff returned to remove the helmets. As soon as they did, Vince looked down at himself in wonder. His body. It was everything he’d ever dreamed. Gigantic in every sense of the word with bulging muscle all over! He then glanced over at Darius who looked tiny in comparison. The intimidating bodybuilder he once was now replaced by an average skinny looking dude.

As soon as his restraints were removed, Vince tore away the remaining shreds of clothes leaving him in nothing but his dress shoes, socks and underwear. The latter of which was struggling against all hell to contain his cock and ass right now. But he wasn’t concerned about that right now. All he cared about was how fucking massive he was!

The very first thing Vince did was lift his hands up to grope his pecs, squeezing the muscle with pure wonder. They felt so soft yet when he tensed his pecs they became firm and hard. After that he bent forwards slightly and flexed both his arms together, feeling as they bulged with strength. His biceps looked like mountains on his arms as they peaked with insane size that not many would be able to match. And his lats… they were enormous! Even pushing his huge arms permanently out to the sides, giving him more of a natural alpha stance. It was incredible. He *felt* incredible!

Before Vince could continue exploring his god-like build however, one of the staff members stepped up carrying a pair of large black boxer briefs, some white joggers and a huge black t-shirt. “We figured you might want a change of clothes before you leave Mr Hamlin. We always have backups.”

The rich Adonis smirked before taking the clothes. “Thanks. I had such a one track mind towards getting this muscle that I hadn’t even considered my clothes.” He glanced down at the remains of his suit strewn across the floor. “Sorry about that by the way.”

“It’s no problem at all sir. We’ve found most people actually prefer keeping their clothes on during a muscle transfer so they can rip out of them anyway. We assumed that’s why you didn’t undress.”

Without another word, Vince pulled down his insanely tight underwear from before and kicked them onto the floor. The staff turned away but not before getting a glance at Vince's huge cock swinging free. It seemed that despite his self control, he was still rocking a semi. Of course the new hunk couldn’t help smirking at this, knowing full well his cock already looked bigger semi-erect right now than it did fully hard before. He didn’t dwell on it too much though. After all, Darius was still in the room. Instead he just pulled up the briefs and joggers he’d been offered, loving how despite their huge size, they still fit him perfectly. He did however decide to keep the t-shirt off for now. He wanted to savour this a little longer…

Meanwhile, as Vince marched over towards a mirror to admire himself further, Darius stood looking down at his thin lanky body. He hadn’t been this skinny since he was a teenager. The last time he did a muscle transfer, the other guy already had a decent but of muscle himself so the transfer wasn’t too crazy. But now? Lord knows how long it was gonna take him to put all that size back on. “Well… back to square one I guess.” He huffed, looking over at the rich white dude across the room who was now enjoying all his hard work. He couldn’t be mad. After all, he was getting an insane amount of money for this. But still. It just felt weird seeing himself like this.

The now miniature sized bodybuilder made his way over towards Vince who had now begun poses and flexing in the mirror, enamoured by his new reflection. Even watching as he pulled down the joggers for a second to get a look at how juicy his new muscle ass was and judging by Vince's reaction, he wasn’t disappointed. “Hey man. Lookin pretty swole! You’re happy with the transfer I take it?” Darius questioned, keeping a positive attitude.

Vince turned to face Darius with a cocky smirk. “Oh you have no idea. It feels even better than I could’ve imagined. Happy would be an understatement.” He confirmed, flexing again. He also couldn’t help but relish in the fact that he was now the one looking down at Darius thanks to the height transfer. “Thank you Darius. I promise you I’ll take good care of all this.” He vowed before extending a hand out.

“You better. I certainly didn’t sculpt all that muscle so a rich white guy could waste it away.” Darius half-joked as he clasped the other man’s hand and shook it firmly.

As they shook Vince couldn’t help but grin inwardly. Darius still hadn’t noticed the extra dick transfer he got the staff the throw in. Not that it mattered if he did because soon enough he’d get the staff to erase the info on the dick transfer from any of the transfer machine’s data logs. By the time Darius realises what’s happened, he’ll have no way to prove it as all the staff in the room will be sworn to secrecy with Vince’s money. It was slightly evil, he knew that. But how could Vince pass up the chance to fuck and dominate dudes not only with all this muscle but with an even longer and fatter cock too! Besides he needs bigger equipment to match his bigger body right!?

The staff then took some time to go over a few details with the men. Listing possible side effects and what to maybe expect post transfer such as headaches and mild nausea for the first 24 hours while their bodies adjust. Vince was hardly listening though, only focusing on how fucking jacked he was now. Once they were done with the formalities however, they said the pair of them were free to either leave or join the rest of the attendees at the buffet.

At last Vince slipped on his t-shirt, adoring how it clung desperately to his giant pecs while the sleeves struggled to hold his biceps. With that he made his way out to the buffet where some of the other winners were already being admired after their own transfers. There were a few others who’d buffed up considerably as well as a few that seemed to have gotten younger with an age transfer no doubt. He even saw the guy who’d bidded on the bearish criminal and sure enough he was covered in thick manly body hair now as he was proudly displaying through his slightly unbuttoned shirt. Not to mention the huge bushy beard he now adorned.

The moment someone noticed Vince however, everyone stopped and looked. His transformation was the most insane of them all and it was no surprise considering who he’d won on the bid. Within moments the attendees and other winners alike came over to ask him how it felt and what it was like. All of them seemingly blown away by his transferral. Of course Vince revelled in the attention and it was now easier than ever to pick out the other gay men from the crowd by the way some of them looked at him.

The rest of his evening was spent being admired and complimented on his new body. It gave Vince a sense of confidence and cockiness he’d never experienced before but he couldn’t deny how much he loved it. He was frequently asked to flex his biceps by the increasingly drunk attendee’s and some people had even asked him to pick them up off the ground to which he did with ease. He even learnt how to bounce his pecs to his and everyone else’s delight. One very drunk dude even made a comment about how he wanted to shove his face between Vince’s juicy pecs. A wish that Vince was happy to grant as he pulled the guy in for a hug and made sure to squish the dude's face between the two slabs of meat on his chest. After which Vince even gave the guy his number so they could maybe meet up another time when he wasn’t so drunk.

Eventually the night came to an end and everyone piled out of the event, eager to get home. On his drive home, Vince couldn’t help thinking about everything he was going to do now. Besides checking himself out every morning he was going to love the attention he was gonna get every time he walked into a room from now on. He was also going to have a ton of fun buying new clothes to fit his gigantic physique. Not to mention how empowering it was going to feel to be the biggest guy at the gym from now on as he works to maintain all this. And most of all he couldn’t wait to get some hot guys to worship all his muscle before he fucks their brains out. He already knew he’d be pounding the guy he gave his number to in the near future. Maybe he could get ahold of the dude that took the bear criminal’s hairiness as well. The dude had definitely been making eyes at him. He was already pretty good looking before but now with all that body hair he looked gorgeous. Vince couldn’t help Imagining how good those bearded lips would feel around his fat cock…

Regardless Vince knew that he was gonna have the time of his life being the muscle beast from now. He reached down and groped his now fully hard cock through his joggers, smiling as he felt a full 8 inches of thick man meat down there. Oh yeah he had A LOT of self worshiping to do when he got home.

More Transfer Auction stories coming in the future!

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#technology #male transformation #male muscle growth #musclegrowth #muscle transfer #cock swap #cock growth #cock theft #permanent #jock #The Transfer Auction

[cyxnidx]

DATE NIGHT !

characters: pantalone, dottore, cyno, kazuha, zhongli.

warnings: a bit smutty on dottore & pantalone, each will have their own individual warnings.

summary: them taking you out on a date <3.

a/n: in honor of me hitting 400+ followers ~ // got a little carried away with dottores .. sorry

PANTALONE !! (implied blow job) ; has always wanted to spoil what’s his. you never knew a moment in which he didn’t want you to himself, always greedy for you. he’s always gave you his heart and soul, greedy for your happiness. greedy to see you smile, your soft interactions with him, and the way your face changes while talking with him. even seeing you do the simplest of things, it made him so happy. so content. which is why he took it upon himself to take you out for dinner for the first time in a while. he could only watch contently as you ate with him happily, a bit of sauce coating the side of your cheek. “careful, you’ve made a mess.” he’d hum, taking a napkin and gently wiping your cheek. if only you knew the exact same thing would happen as soon as you got home. humming, you smirked sweetly as pantalone coated your face with his cum. with a shit eating grin, he repeated the same words as earlier. “you’ve made a mess, again. such a messy one, aren’t you?”

CYNO adorned you in the outfit you let him choose for you. he just couldn’t get over how great you looked in it, so much so you often caught him zoning out mid conversation. “cyno,” you called, waving a hand in front of his face. “..cyno??” sometimes there was absolutely no way to get him out of his little dream land doing whatever he could think of.. throughout the dinner, he could only stare at you as you spoke happily, about what you loved most and things you wanted to try. though, glared at your waiter for getting along with you ‘too easily’, or that’s what he said was the reason why. “im not jealous. i just dont like the way they look at you..” he said once you addressed it. “right..” you rolled your eyes, allowing him to guide you up a slightly steep hill, sitting with you under a tree. the moonlight reflected off his skin beautifully, creating a soothing caramel glow. “y’know..you have really pretty skin.” you said mindlessly, grabbing his chin and smiling softly, only to be met with a confused stare. “huh?”

DOTTORE !! (choking, possible size kink?, dottore being dottore…) ; never hid his intentions with you, but loved the suspense of having you guess. making small noises every once in a while, he giggled to himself. that was probably the only way you knew he was in a particularly good mood. however, he was a bit more quirky today compared to usual. he came home the same, but was so..giddy. it almost scared you. what got him so happy in the first place? and how exactly was it so..fitting..that it got him to make the noises he was now? between the maniacal giggles and the slight hums, you couldn’t tell how on earth he got that happy. though, with a simply grasp of your wrist, you were dragged away into your bedroom. “dottore?” you asked, trying to steady your shaky vision. was he feeling moody today? “stay still for me, dear.” was all he said as he wrapped his hand around your neck, free hand working on undoing his belt and pants. “dottore, we don’t have t-“ he shushed you, smirk forming slowly. “just need you for a few moments; that’s it.” he said with a smooth voice, though, nothing about him could be considered smooth right now. his smirk only turned to a maniacal grin as he watched you squirm under him so pitifully. it almost made him feel bad. almost. “20 minutes is all i ask. wont you give me that much?”

KAZUHA to you and kazuha, a date wasn’t much of something that stemmed off of food, dinner or even going out. of course, he loved spoiling you, but with material things isn’t his forte. he much rather give you all his time, energy and space. go out and explore things with you much rather than buying or wasting time on things you’ll only wear once or twice. he’d rather make beautiful memories and see new landscapes. which is why he decided on taking you out to see the sunsets of Liyue, enjoying how the shades of orange and pink blend together, stars forming slowly. “it’s so beautiful,” he sighed, eyes looming all dreamily. you couldn’t help but stare at the scarlet color against the beautiful landscape. “you ever think about how pretty your eyes are?” you asked. he turned to you, blinking slightly. “is that so?”

ZHONGLI is what you’d consider a simple man. much like the romantic type, mostly. always buying you flowers randomly, getting you chocolates and going as far as leaving you little notes just for a bit of fun. so, dinner didn’t make any difference. despite the weather, he came over after shopping a bit and began cooking dinner. though, it surprised you a bit. he never said anything about him cooking, only coming over to spend time with you. come to find out, this is what he meant by spending time with you. finding a show you both enjoy, cooking, and eating together. it made him warm thinking about it. the thought was enough to make him crave you more than ever. the rain outside only extended the moment more, dripping rain falling softly outside creating a nice feeling. kissing you on the forehead, he smiled contently after setting your plates on the table in front of the tv. “i love you.”

#cyxnidx #genshin impact #smut #genshin impact smut #genshin smut #dottore x reader #dottore smut #dottore #pantalone x reader #pantalone smut #pantalone #if you arent supporting zhongli what is wrong with you #support zhongli for clear skin and less depression #genshin impact zhongli #zhongli x reader #Zhongli fluff #zhongli my beloved #zhongli #zhongli imagines #genshin zhongli #kazuha is so cute #genshin impact kazuha #kazuha fluff #kazuha x reader #kazuha imagines #genshin cyno #cyno x reader #cyno fluff #cyno genshin impact #genshin impact fluff

[roarriita]

the chick from apartment 512 - ellie williams (1)

au

femreader!xelliewilliams!

content warning: explicit language, mentions of drugs and alcohol, sexual thoughts

// summary: moving into your new apartment was fairly easy. you left ‘home’ with just your government papers, banking cards and whatever clothes you could find at your parents crampet and cold house. although the neighborhood was a bit shady and the apartment elevator made an eerie sound whenever it'd start up, it was all you could afford, and it beat crashing another night at your friend's house. move in day proved to be better than expected when you catch sight of your new neighbor. her auburn hair and green eyes seemed to be all the proof that you needed, to know that this new chapter of your life would be worth paying attention to and not just skimming over. //

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you walked around your new place and sighed in satisfaction. "this will do, for now." you spoke out loud. your best friends since high school, turned to you, one holding a worried expression and the other smiling from ear to ear.

"i'm so proud of you!" jesse came up from beside you and gave you a tight side hug.

"now are you saying that because you're genuinely proud of me for getting my own place or because i won't be in the way of you and dina's sexy time."

"(y/n), why can't it be both?" jesse asked. you scoffed but couldn't help but smile at his response. you escaped from his grasp and stood in front of the perfect couple.

"i still don't know how to feel about this." dina admitted. "this building isn’t really up to code, i mean, a rat literally corned jesse in the elevator when he was on his way up with your new microwave."

"babe, what the hell." jesse said, embarrassingly. "you said you wouldn't tell anyone."

"it'll be fine, d." you crossed your arms, looking around the floor in uncertainty before looking back at dina. "yeah, yeah, it’ll be fine! i'll just make sure to keep the place extra tidy."

your voice was not convincing at all. "oh, come on (y/n), it's not even just about the rats, the hallways reek of marijuana and booze."

"you smoke weed all the time?" you immediately retorted.

"well, that's different. i'm a homeowner, i can smoke however much i want without having to take into consideration how my neighbor from 3 feet away would react." dina said.

"i'm not even reacting dina. being friends with you guys for the past six years has built up my tolerance." you remarked.

dina groaned, storming over to the window. jesse, who was still thinking about the way dina put his business out there, spoke again. "i am never telling you anything again." he then went to the kitchen area, to look for a snack.

"look, there’s blood right there on the sidewalk." dina pointed. you sighed, annoyingly as you walked over. "and it looks fresh."

you examined the splotch to where she pointed at and rolled your eyes. "what are you? a detective?"

"no, i'm a journalist, which is almost the same thing." dina responded before turning her body back to you. "but back to the point, i don't think this place is right for you. i feel like you rushed into this. why don't you just come back with jesse and i until you find somewhere else..." glancing outside and then back at you, she finished. "preferably with less crime."

"no, no!" jesse said, with his mouth stuffed of hot cheetos. "i will not listen to another true crime podcast at 2 in the morning. i'm still so confused as to why you choose to listen to that stuff at 2 in the damn morning?"

"i get bored." you shrugged.

"ugh, enough with the getting off topic. (y/n), you're coming back home with us." dina stated.

"no, i am not." you replied. "i am staying here. i signed the lease, i got the apartment keys and i've already moved in all my stuff, plus the new furniture i had to buy to make this place look less sad. i am staying." after a moment of complete silence, you then added. "i'll also lose my deposit if i break the lease and i will need my 400 dollars back eventually."

"oh my god, if this is what having children is like, i don't want them." dina wrapped her arms around you. "i just want you to be safe."

you embraced dina back. "i’ll be safe, d. i'm a big girl who can take care of herself and if i do see a rat, i'll just call jesse over to coward in the corner again until it goes away." you then mouthed for him to stop eating your cheetos.

"asshole." jesse cursed under his breath as he turned around to put your chips back.

dina chuckled with tears in her eyes. she pulled away but held onto your shoulders. "promise you'll text me everyday and call at least twice a week?"

"promise." you responded with a small smile. dina hugged you again, this time holding on for a few seconds longer before pulling away. "okay, i guess we better go and let you get adjusted."

jesse gave you another hug and placed a sincere kiss on top of your head. "stay safe, weirdo."

"you too." you said as you walked them to the door. once they got on the elevator, you went back inside your small apartment and double locked your door.

you decided to spend the rest of your day unpacking and decorating. for the first time in your life, you were officially on your own. you were terrified of course, but a part of you felt exhilarated. you were the type of girl who went about life on the side lines. you were always there, physically but mentally, you were somewhere else. somewhere far away from the pain and humiliation being in your present-self caused you. and so, you skimmed through life. only taking notice of the big things, the things that were hard to miss and ignoring whatever didn't stand out. it was sad but it was how you survived.

a knock on your door pulled you out of your thoughts. you slowly made your way up to the front door and looked in the peephole. it was a delivery man. you hesitantly opened your door. "can i help you?'

"is this apartment 511 where a miss.williams resides in?" the man asked.

"you got the first half right." you tell him. "i literally just moved in today so i don't even know if that package belongs to one of my neighb-"

you stopped talking when the apartment across from you and a few feet over, opened the door. "sorry, that's me!"

"you're ellie williams?" the guy asked.

"no, i'm her- her-" the girl who didn't even know what she was, said. "her friend. i can take it for her."

"that's nice and all but i really need the owner of this package to sign a form first." he told her as he walked over to her.

the girl groaned annoyingly before calling out for her friend. "babe! he needs your signature!" as she went back inside the apartment, you felt the urge to do the same. the problem was resolved and your assistance was no longer needed, not like you helped much, if any, to begin with.

right as you were about to turn away, your new neighbor approached her doorway. you couldn't resist the urge to stare at her. she had dark green eyes, short, auburn hair and freckles all around her nose and cheeks. you could've sworn dina was the prettiest girl you've ever seen until now. she also wore a black tank top with grey sweatpants. "hey." her voice held a bit of rasp to it. "you need me to sign?"

"yeah." the guy responded as he held out his clipboard. you watched as her toned arms reached for it. your eyes then lingered over her long fingers as she signed the paper, and you could also detect some ink on the sleeve of her arm. your brain itched with the curiosity of what her tattoo was. once she was done, she handed the guy the clipboard back and took her package. "thanks."

"no problem." the guy responded, before walking away. your eyes were still on her arm since you didn't even realize the delivery guy had left. your new neighbor with the pretty eyes and cute freckles noticed you standing there as your eyes bored into her arm.

she coughed in order to get your attention. when your eyes met hers, your cheeks flushed. "it's nice right? it hurt like a son of a bitch to get but it does well with the girls." a playful smirk laid on her lips.

your voice was caught in your throat. you didn't know how to respond or what to think. you were already horrible with human interactions but even worst with girls who looked like that. "i- uh- i- um-" you stuttered like an idiot making the girl across from you lightly laugh.

absolutely hating the feeling of someone teasing you like this, you tried gathering up your composure and coming up with something to respond with. you smiled as it was in your nature to, it was like a reflex for the times in which you were lost for words. "cocky is not a good look on pretty girls." you scoffed before heading inside your apartment and shutting the door.

ellie genuinely smiled at your response and even let out a small chuckle before heading back inside. when you heard her door close, you pushed your back up against your own door and slid to the floor. with your knees pulled up to your chest, you cupped your warm cheeks and tried focusing on getting your heartbeat to slow down. first day, at your new place and you've already embarrassed yourself, how lovely... just so lovely...

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part two, here

// a/n: yes, this was inspired by an amazing song from selena quintanilla!! i’m not sure if i want to make this an official long-fanfic or just a one-shot but i really just wanted to write something new before starting chapter 6 of roommates. i really enjoyed it, especially writing dina and jesse. i’m definitely going to write more of them in my other series. anyway, thanks for reading and i hope your having an amazing day and if not i am sending wishes for that to change immediately <3 //

#ellie x female reader #ellie williams fanfic #tlou #tlou2 #ellie williams au #elliexreader #neighbor trope #masc ellie #cocky ellie #nervous reader #dinatlou #jesse tlou #dina and jesse

[joshslater]

Manhood Exchange

The premise is based on a story I read a while back and forgot to bookmark. Similar stories and bonus material on my Patreon.

I was in a shopping mall when I got the notification on my phone. Out of habit I just tapped the icon and suddenly I got a large, erect cock filling the phone screen. I immediately became aware of where I was and had a few seconds of panic before reassuring myself that no one else saw it. I moved a few steps to somewhere less open, where no one could walk behind me, and had a look again.

It was beautiful. Massive and uncut, with the skin pulled back to expose the pink, gleaming head. Actually the entire cock glistened like he had made a few strokes with precum on his hand and then positioned himself with just the right lighting to make the veins pop a little extra. The truly remarkable part was however the overlay at the bottom of the screen. "$400, quick trade"

I'd been on the Manhood Exchange app long enough to know a cock like this is usually hundred times that price, if not more. Whatever impression you've got from watching porn, people are on a bell curve with cock sizes, and the ones on the higher end of the scale aren't selling. All the people who used to compensate with a big truck suddenly ended up in the same market, competing for the same cocks, and they make a hell of a lot more big trucks than big cocks. Oddly enough there was a market for really small cocks as well, not quite as high prices, but just as small supply. Normal people like me in the middle of the bell curve with no cash to buy and no cock to sell just had to make do.

It's not enough for a cock to just enter the market either, which itself is a thread to needle with the 18-35 eligible age span and clean health declaration. For you to find one it has to be bio-compatible for science reasons and roughly the same race for ethics reasons, though the latter is just a matter of money. Obviously I tapped the "Deal!" button in the app before I even checked out his profile. With that kind of cock everyone would know you either had a shit ton of money, or you could get it by selling. The profile didn't add much though. Just more good-looking images of him and his cock. A text message function as well, but was there really anything to talk about?

You'd think I'd be a bit more careful swapping cock with another man, especially since you can't swap again until all the cells have been replaced because of some quantum spin entanglement bullshit. Ten years with bad meat is a long wait, but I already knew he was a bio-match and healthy, so it was more Fear Of Missing Out. I had some shit I hope I could fence, so I took an instant online loan and had the whole deal closed before I'd passed Baskin Robbins on the way out. Both I and my normal size cock were excited.

Just ten minutes later the phone chimed again with a proposed time for the swap at 7:20 pm, almost three hours away. Though I didn't know anything about this less than an hour ago, any delay felt too long, like I hadn't realized how much I wanted this. What it would mean for my position in the crew. Every minute of waiting was a minute where something could derail everything. My phone could be stolen. The exchange could cancel it for some reason. I tapped "Accept" and headed home with the phone in a secure grip in my pocket.

The instructions after I had accepted were straightforward. Be seated with a naked crotch and open the app ten minutes before the scheduled time for exchange. I decided to be pantsless until then just to be safe, and I set three alarms on the phone. One at 6:50 to sit down, if I wasn't already sitting, one at 7:05 to be ready, and one at 7:09 to open the app. I sent a text to Shawn and told him I wouldn't be joining the crew until later, if at all. No details of why.

Then I just sat down in the comfy chair. Three hours to go. I was only wearing my hat, socks, and T-shirt. And my bling of course. The sweatpants and my trunks were in a pile on the floor, and the phone was charging next to me. My cock was pointing almost straight up.

I realized that it would only be my cock for another few hours or so, and I should say goodbye properly. Normally I would jerk off in the shower or in front of the computer, but since I was already perfectly seated and with an erect cock in front of me I just grabbed it and started to remember all the highlights we'd had. When my neighbor Jamar excited came over and wanted to show me something. He was a few years older, but still occasionally spent some time with me. He showed me into the bathroom, lowered his pants, and told me to do the same. Then he showed me that by pulling on his cock he could get it to "bend" in his words. I remembered waking up one early morning with my boxers wet and worried I'd peed my bed. To my surprise they were filled with slime, but just to be safe I put them under the bed to dry so my mother wouldn't know. I remembered that time I got an erection during a movie screening, and slowly wanked but desperately trying to avoid cumming or anyone else noticing what I did.

I remembered the first time I had sex, the first porn I jerked off to, the first time a date ended in sex, the first time I had sex in a car, the first time I jerked off to a porn video on my mobile. All while doing this I tried to go as slow as I could, like at the movie. Flashing before me were dates, partners, and porn stars, while the top of my cock had some frothy pre-cum. I was shocked when the alarm went off. How the fuck could time have moved that fast. I scrambled to get hold of an old T-shirt within reach, and pretty quickly came into it with a few pumps of cum. Not really the satisfying climax I had envisioned.

Suddenly time was moving slowly again, and I was stuck watching dried off, limp cock in front of me. I became self-conscious about how it looked, worried about if the seller would cancel the trade last minute seeing what a lousy deal it was for him. He'd seen my photos already though, but they were taken erect and with good lighting. What was the cancellation policy anyway? The next alarm went off. Why did I even set that one? I was getting nervous. What if it hurt? There was a lot of news about misteleportations some years ago, and this was way more complicated. I didn't even understand how it worked. I knew the basics of standard teleportation from school. Every particle is a probability wave that exists everywhere, but the probability of it actually being at a specific point is overwhelming. By manipulating the quantum state you can poke the probability so that it is more likely to be somewhere else. Just a change in probability, so it can move instantaneously anywhere in the universe, given enough math. Swapping body parts between people was way harder, so it was bound to have lots of issues that could happen.

The last alarm interrupted my train of thought. I kind of felt not ready. Rich people did this, so it should be safe to do I reasoned, and tapped the activation button on the phone.

"This will start a legally binding contract with Manhood Exchange Incorporated adjudicated in the state of Delaware. Please identify yourself." the phone voice said. I pressed the white circle on the screen with my identification finger, the middle one of course.

"Please sign that you are aware that concluding this transaction will replace your penis, testicles, prostate, and relevant connecting tissue, glands, and other structures with a third party as preliminary agreed." I pressed the circle again, wondering what would happen if I didn't. The $400 would certainly be gone.

"Please sign that you are aware that this is a one-time transfer option with Manhood Exchange Incorporated that cannot be reversed through quantum transplantation." I pressed the circle a third time.

"Please sign that you are aware that both set of testicles will be made infertile through this swap." I pressed the circle a fourth time, not so nervous I barely registered what I had signed. The screen of the phone changed to showing a live video from my selfie camera, showing me half-naked in my lounge chair. "Tap to connect" it said on the screen. I did.

The image quickly changed to show the man from the photos lying down in a white, far more upscale couch than I was sitting in. "Yo, man. You ready to do this?" he asked. His erect cock was just as big as it had looked on the photos, almost looking bigger as it was swaying with his breathing. The instructions on the screen said "Verify the other party is the selected exchange party and that he is seated with exposed crotch."

"Yeah, let's do it." I said, and tapped the Verified button on the screen. I could see from his motions that he did the same, and a timer started on the screen, counting down to 7:20. "So, will it fit in speedos?" I blurted out, still feeling nervous and with several minutes to kill. He chuckled. "Shorts are better for swimming, but you want some tight trunks to keep it in place when you're wearing normal clothes. I use compression shorts a lot."

"Well, you can use whatever with mine."

The last 40 seconds we just stared at the countdown in silence. The actual swap was instant, almost silent, though I wouldn't be able to describe the sound, and without any shimmers of light as you can sometimes see when teleporting. It felt like someone spilled warm water over my crotch, though that quickly went away, but it was replaced with the most amazing, intense horny hardon I've ever felt. It was like the cock was buzzing, craving attention. "Enjoy the wank" the other guy said. "What? Oh. Thanks!" I said and the video was closed from his side.

I grabbed the cock with my hand and instantly felt the difference in size. It was almost the size of my wrist. I just moved my hand up and a trickle of precum oozed out and trickled down over my fingers. I leaned back, closed my eyes, and continued where I had left off, thinking about the most recent porn videos, and in not too long I could feel the buildup of a climax, only this time I was unable to force it back. It just kept building and building, and I think I actually moaned out loud as the first rope of cum erupted. Then another one, and another one. Then I had to open my eyes to look at the mess, and it wasn't any small squirts of cum either. It looked almost comical how my T-shirt was completely soaked in cum, and I was still pumping out a few more ropes.

To my amazement the cock was still semi-erect. I got up and hurried to the bathroom and threw the cum-wet T-shirt. After a quick look at my sticky chest I decided to have a shower. I stripped out of the few remaining items I had on and proceeded to have another wank in the shower. This one lasted a bit longer and produced slightly less cum, but it was still a shocking amount.

I had barely dried and put on my underwear before the new cock started to firm up again. I grabbed the phone and sent a text to the seller in the app. "What the hell is happening with my cock? Were you always hard?"

The app sat silent for a few minutes until a response chimed. "It's called hyperspermia. It's a genetic condition, so not a disease in Manhood Exchange's definition. You'll learn to cope several hours between wanks. It was the precum that bothered me the most. Just drink a lot of water, always wear a condom, and compression shorts really help, as I said. Good luck!"

[bentosandbox]

Ambience Synesthesia tutorial blog

rambled this out because I didn't have inflight wifi otw home and the turbulence was too crazy to draw

Buying the ticket

erm so they only dropped the tickets like slightly less than a month before lol kinda insane

The concert tickets were sold on Damai so you need a CN number or know/pay someone with one who'd buy it for you which is what I did by recommendation (A tier 1280 + 400 'service fee' [apparently it would have been cheaper if they only helped you half way or something but i wasnt gonna risk running into a payment hiccup so]) Iirc they sold it in two batches but I don't remember the ratio split between first and second wave…

I got a ticket for 5/5's afternoon show (so the second last performance), I DID meet an oomf who said they managed to snag a ticket for themselves on their own (without a Professional Ticket Snatcher) so its not too impossible to attain on your own I think??? (I didn't get a CN number until like 2 days before I flew back home soo)

Professional Ticket what?? Uhhh apparently there's a whole industry/scene for this you look for listings on xianyu/taobao etc for people to buy on your behalf, you have to give them your real name and identification number (so for foreigners it'd be your passport number) for verification purposes during entry so yknow yea

getting there

You could cab directly to the venue but my friend signed us up for the free shuttle bus (they had freebies last year but not this time) and before we boarded they gave us like free water and bread (apparently free raincoats too on rainy days) which was nice of them but also insane because. the venue doesn't allow you to bring food/drinks in so a lot of people were leaving A LOT of unopened bottles near the gate and I saw a venue staff just throwing them all into the bin (HOPEFULLY JUST TO CARRY THEM AWAY IN ONE GO AND NOT FOR STRAIGHT DISPOSAL….) They drop you off near the venue but you don't go in directly, there's a 'Doctor break room' where most people are seated waiting to be ushered in batches into the venue, but also a lot of people standing around on one side of the room swapping/offering merch

merch swap

ive been told this is a very concert culture thing but i feel like its kind of different because a lot of these are so high quality ike…you could sell them at Artist Alleys but here they are just distributing for free if you have a E2 60 blorbo lmao or whatever (there seems to be a tiny…? minority that prints official art but most of them seem to be handdrawn/made)

i was too unprepared for this lol i did exchange some of my old stickers (missed out on a collapsal plastic fan bc my brain lagged when the guy asked me and i went to my auto 'sorry i dont have any merch' response' :( regretted this bc the room got a little hot from the amount of people in there and i was wearing like 3 layers with that fan on my mind)

from people watching a lot of trades are arranged beforehand on weibo/other sites unless you're willing to yell WHO WANTS TO TRADEEE/anyone wants freebies (a lot of people were also wearing 'Feel Free to Swap Merch/Ask for Freebies' tags) which i was definitely not brave enough to do lol… met up with an oomf i got to know from last dec when i attended an arknights only and they gave me some birbs and charms (bottom of post), there was someone who got a free LGD zine and charm from me bc i posted on wb that id give a free copy to anyone with a Mod 3 swire/swummer LMFAO

I had 2 more people to meet but, uhhh so I bought an esim for mobile data and it would intermittently lose signal here and there which was a little annoying when getting coffee but it just died entirely when i reached the venue and it was kind of Dire because i was waiting for one more friend who was coming over from the fes and i couldn't contact them lmao. told the friend i came with to go in first because I thought if my food got confiscated at least my oomf could see it beforehand LOL

waited outside in a light drizzle for an hour trying to trouble shoot my data to no avail and ended up borrowing a staff's wifi hotspot to get my entry qr code (I actually bought a second data roaming plan on my local sim but i quite stupidly did not check the country coverage and only learned later that night that 'Asia' doesn't cover China kuxiao) she was so nice i was (bow emoji) so sorry to trouble you im a stupid gaijin and she was like no its ok enjoy shanghai!! pien

spent a good 30min next to this board praying for data to no avail

the show

erm anyway because of that clownery above i more or less missed the first piece (the one w the goated hoho) but at least i wasnt the guy next to me who went for a bathroom break right before starset came up

The live singing this year was definitely an improvement I think… I can't really remember the setlist off the top of my head but I'm sure someone else has already listed it out, there were a couple of new pieces that weren't related to the concert groups like a Babel/Kazdel?? one sung in Latin, a Victoria…? one (in victorian ofc) also an Amiya (? just remembering by the visuals they used lol) one in Japanese

ohh yeah so almost every track would start with like a faction logo transitioning in from 3d to 2d which was cool but also amusing because it was honestly bringing quite the 'I will Make Your Company Logo Into 3D Fiverr' vibes

Since I missed the first piece idk if any of The Dreamer(s) got 3D models but The Pilgrim(s why are they all singular) had Kaltsit playing on that piano (there was also a replica of that piano on stage the white one complete with 'Arknights' text on it lmao) and Siege being cool running around in 3D (and ofc Eureka during her denpa number) it was very cool but man... its a pity the other characters in the group just get their live2d png during the beginning and effectively get sidelined lool compared to say Phenomenal Agents idk if i like this tradeoff but that eureka bit was so good sheesh #NOVAFIVE⭐ULTRALIVESWEEP

The other stuff was really great too looking at you Lone Trail medley…!!!!! I might be wrong but I... assume... you're encouraged to karaoke bc they always show the lyrics on screen… I couldn't even hear myself anyway but it was very fun singing songs you can't get on joysound/etc with a whole crowd going at it too (even if most of them would only sing 1-2 lines of the chorus)

Mary Clare did Radiant (they had the lyrics scrolling on the sides very cool) and iirc the Throne group's song...? Radiant was so fun live

Starset did Monster > Telescope and when the latter ended they were like Bye! and we(?) started yelling ENCORE--awkwardly because idk how they do it here (I was half expecting it to be JP style 'an-call-roo' but a bunch of us just yelled en-core en-core here and there until they returned to perform Infected) speaking of yelling.. between every piece when they had to switch sets people would just yell memes or skill names (like Dage's) to pass the time or sth i barely caught half of whatever they were memeing about

did i forget to mention anything else uhhh originium rock turntable for Guide Ahead's boss theme/Dossoles Lobby and they had IS4 medley live throat singing very cool also the dancers they got for silbenherze's boss theme good stuff...

iirc after starset was like a behind the scenes video of how HG prepared for AS and a recorded lowlight video saying some stuff that i forgot LOL just some thank you message basically. 9.5/10 bc no missy/shu EP live

i just realised i forgot to display all the merch from the A tier ticket but w/e. light stick photo ft. merch swaps/gifts from friends and strangers 🥹 (the iffy lenticular card was literally dropped into my bag by an iffy coser (wearing the LT outfit..?!) while waiting for the cab LMAO)

#arknights #bentotexto #will blog about the festival in another post because i dont think theyll let me post that many photos #yeah i got the logos/theresa pillow but im giving it to a friend

[c0kitty]

𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆 .... 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐖  w/ satoru gojo x f!reader               « 0:00 ─〇───── 0:00 ⇄                            

summary: fan journalist!reader interviews celebrity!gojo. (⛦) content: suggestive. pervy gojo. reader is kinda obsessed with him but not in a yandere way. nervous-wreck reader. (⛦) w/c: 400+

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who you were a big fan of, you knew almost everything about him. from buying the limited posters that cost 100 bucks on ebay, to watching every movie/tv show he had, (even if they were background characters), to creating an account dedicated to him.

so, imagine how you felt when your boss asked you to interview him.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who sits in his chair, his thick legs, man-spreads in the uncomfortable chair. his broad back hits the back of his chair, as you hurriedly get ready to set up your questions. his eyes traveled all over your body, from your short skirt which raised as you sat, to your pretty red lips that quipped a hello.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who loves how nervous you get while trying to question him, your cards which you try to shuffle in order, drops to the ground, and he watches as the space in shirt shows your lacy leopard bra you’d put on, in a sense for him; your breast on full display. 

he’d noticed also, the cute stumble of your words, your fidgets of your hands — how would you twirl with the ends of your braids. the reactions you’d given him, compare to his fans, were more endearing to watch.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who responds to your questions, with so much thought. 

unlike in his other interview where he sat bored, expressionless. he liked the questions you'd given him; they weren't about the recent girl he's been shown with or scandal but, actual personal questions about his childhood, how he felt about the movie's message relating to him and, memories he’d forgotten.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who completely gets off track with the interview, at some point, he was just gojo interviewing/flirting with you. his smile widening, upon hearing your answers, your pretty voice was like music to his ears.

"...yeah, japan cherry blossoms used to be my favorite thing as a child. maybe, one day i could show you?"

" — you have a pretty smile.” (you almost folded right then and there.)

“where is a pretty girl like you from?”

but you had to pause, wondering if you should continue, even if you so badly wanted to, you had to stay professional. you turn to the camera man, who waves their hand to keep going.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who starts to trend on twitter because of the interview. people watching found it so enduring how whipped satoru looked compared to how flustered you seemed to be, some people even shipping you guys.

⛦ ── celebrity!satoru who tries finds any of your socials after watching all your interviews online, tracking down everyone he knew to find you. when his secretary finally comes to him with your twitter, all he can do is laugh as he looks through your likes, and a gojo stan accounts linked to yours.

void.satoru sent a message: 

so ur the one croppin those pictures of my ass

#satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojo x female reader #satoru x female reader #hope i didnt spell his name wrong #female reader x jjk #jjk x reader

[octuscle]

Hey Chronivac support! I had set the chronivac to slowly build up my twig of a best friend into a hairy muscle bound beast but I think the delay has gone on too long. Could you help me?

I am very sorry, but somehow things went wrong…. A somewhat unfortunate combination of technical problems and user errors. I suggest I define a scenario at the end of which the desired result should be. And I set the total duration of the transformation to eight days.

First part of the transformation is the retroactive change of your friend's routines. His body will now change in 24 hours as if he had already had the following daily routine for a year longer: two hours to the gym in the morning before university, one hour of running during the lunch break, another two hours to the gym in the evening. And then preparing the next day's meals and packing them in Tupperware. Saturdays are a training break, Sundays first two hours of swimming, then six hours of gym and then another hour of yoga. A life just for sports. A highly disciplined life for studying and for sports.

The second part is changing his genetics. Every day one of his great-grandparents is replaced. Until his father is a Moroccan who immigrated just before he was born. And his mother is an Albanian who has also only been living here for 25 years.

I start the tomorrow morning on Friday at 08:00 am. Sit back and enjoy!

Friday morning. You are both still rookies in the office. But you want to make a career. Getting a job in the research and development department has been a great success. And you both have no desire not to build on that. Accordingly, you are punctually at your workplace at 08:00. Everything is still quite normal. But when you meet for lunch at 12:00, your friend is pretty upset. He thinks that he has forgotten his running clothes. And that he will have to make up for the running session tomorrow. You look at him questioningly. And you notice that he looks fitter somehow. At 4:00 p.m. you get a message. Your friend has also forgotten his training clothes and has therefore already gone home and is then going straight to the gym. Dinner at 20:00 as arranged in your favorite steakhouse. Your friend is on time. However, he is not showered and still in his tracksuit. Had he not shaved this morning. He looks like a three-day beard. The meal is first about the week at the office. And then about the plans for the weekend. Tomorrow we're going to do some shopping. Your friend convinces you to come to the gym on Sunday. When you say goodbye, you realize that your friend only had the 400 gram filet with green salad and alcohol-free beer and water. You drank the wine all by yourself. Slightly drunk, you go home and fall into bed.

On Saturday morning your best friend rings you out of bed. Where you stay. The early bird catches the worm. He would have made up for yesterday's running session by now and would like to start doing some shopping. Damn, it's only 10:00 o'clock. You didn't expect him until 12:00. When you finally meet in the mall, there are already some big shopping bags next to your friend. Nutritional supplements. Protein powder. Sportswear. And he definitely looks changed. Not a gram of fat on his body anymore. But a firm ass and a visibly wider back. Fuck, it seems to work. When you're shopping, your conversations are almost all about sports. You actually start to develop an interest in it as well. And you also buy some new clothes and training shoes. You arrange to go clubbing in the evening. You almost didn't recognize your friend. His black T-shirt is almost painted on his upper body. And he moves on the dance floor as if he had never done anything else. He thinks that functional training pays off here, too. His movement coordination is getting better and better. You shake your head and get yourself a gin and tonic. And bring your friend a water.

When you arrive at the gym at 4 p.m. on Sunday, your friend is already moaning in a sweat on the leg press. "Bro, didn't we say 12:00 for Box Fit?" he says. You reply that anything before 4:00 p.m. would have been a challenge for you after last night. Your friend gives you a Fist Bump. And says that he needs your support with the chest workout. When your friend leaves for yoga at 6:30pm, you are completely screwed. And you wonder why your boyfriend has such hairy forearms…

On Monday morning you both arrive at work at the same time. Your best friend is talking on the phone in a language you can't understand. "My Albanian grandmother in Tirana has birthday today", he answers, reading your thoughts. Who the hell has a birthday, you ask yourself. Your friend walks up the stairs in front of you. Fuck, an ass made of concrete, you think to yourself. The idea of running during lunch break was really super stupid. You can hardly move from yesterday. So your friend has to wait for you all the time. And bridges the waiting time with burpees. And did he just flirt with the young guy at the pull-up bar? Fuck, the only thing that gets hard with you is your dick. When showering at the end of the lunch break, you can no longer cover up. Your boyfriend looks appreciative and gives you a kiss before it goes back to work. Before you go to bed you do a round of pushups and situps.

On Tuesday morning, your boyfriend is already there when you enter the office shortly after 08:00. And tries to persuade you again to come with him to pump in the morning. Getting up at 4:00 a.m. doesn't seem very attractive to you. But you catch yourself imagining how horny it would be to suck the sweat out of your boyfriend's beard. Shit, since when does he have a beard? In any case, you are already looking forward to the shower after the run. After work you go to dinner together in a small Albanian restaurant. Your friend seems to know everyone there. You don't understand a word they say. But the food is delicious. And you promise to come to the training tomorrow night. Your best friend grabs his sports bag, gives you a French kiss and disappears to his next sports session.

When you arrive at the office on Wednesday, the smell almost takes your breath away. Your friend is sitting across from you, grinning. He lost track of time during his workout and didn't have time to shower. Fuck, he can't work here in his sweaty workout clothes. Not because it bothers you. Because you can't get your hard-on under control anymore. It doesn't get better during the lunch break and shower. Not until your buddy in the shower goes down on his knees in front of you and gives you a blowjob. Until the end of the day you can hardly think of anything else but that you will return the favor tonight after the workout.

Hopefully no one will notice that your friend is wearing the same clothes today as yesterday. After the workout you did some cardio in your apartment. Riding on your boyfriend's cut big dark cock was awesome! Just a pity that he has made himself in the middle of the night again out of the way. But damn, he only does what you wanted. And he is no longer the man he was a week ago. His name is Eset now. But that's perfectly natural for everyone. As is the fact that he mostly works with t-shirts or short-sleeved shirts. It would be too bad to hide his biceps. For tonight, Eset has something special planned. After the workout, you'll go to an Arabian hamam. Only horny almost naked men! However, Eset still stands out here. He may not be as hairy as many here. But already one of the big boys.

It was just one night for the two of you. But it feels strange to wake up alone today. Eset is already here again before you. And has put breakfast on your desk. Cottage cheese with protein powder and fruit. He's right, you look like a twig next to him. You have to change that. When he asks if you're going out for steak again tonight, Eset looks at you like you're totally nuts. Lad, it's Friday. First to the mosque, then to sports. Of course, you had totally forgotten that. Okay, then you can work out your arms a bit before Eset comes along. Wait a minute! Mosque? What the hell?

Saturday. Eight days gone. You have a date in the park. Throw a few balls. Meet up with the lads. Eset is already there warming up with some bros. The fellas stand together and talk in Arabic. Until their alpha bro sees you.

Given his roots, Eset is a bit coy about exchanging kisses in public. But he licks the ball and throws it to you. And you lick his spit off.

#male tf #muscle tf #chronivac #reality change #race change

[slavic-roots-western-mind]

Chinese Measurement Units Guide

At first glance the Chinese clothes sizes make little sense (they still make not that much sense even at the 15th glance as well to be honest). And the fruit and veggie prices are also no odder.

Then I realized that China has its own local measurement units, so here are some unique measurement units you should look out for plus an odd one out.

1. Weight

Kilograms are used (confirmed this during my medical exam, which is a story in itself), but for things like fruits, veggies etc. 公斤 is used, which is basically kilos divided by 2.

一斤 (yī jīn）= 500g

两斤 (liǎng jīn）= 1kg*

*Even though 斤 is translated to as pounds sometimes, it's actually kilos.

This is also used for clothing sizes (on taobao at least), so if you want to get an accurateish estimate you need to convert your weight to kilos, multiple by 2 and then select a size that fits within the range.

For example: if you weight 70 kg, you then multiple that by 2 = 140斤. Clothes will usually have size ranges e.g. 120-145斤, so that could fit into the L (Large) category.

Note: Sizes vary across stores, so an L in one shop can be an XL in another store or an 2XL in a different store so be ready to contact the seller asking for more specific measurements if not too sure.

2. Length

Usually kilometres and metres are used, but there's also a local system.

0.5 km - 1里 - lǐ

1 km - 2里 - lǐ

3. Area

Same as the previous one, the western measurement units are used but there's also a local system. Not very common from what I've heard, but still pretty handy and interesting to know.

1 km² -15顷 - qǐng

4. Volume

Volume is the same as the metric system, with it's own name so no surprises here.

1 L - 1 升 - shēng

The only major issue I've had has been with the weight measurement and its conversion, but other than that there aren't many issues.

5. Contact lenses

Maybe it's a location thing, but the eye diopter thing here is slightly different.

If your prescription is -4.00, then here it'll be just -400 or just 400 without the minus if buying on Taoboa. It should be obvious (farsightedness of +4.00?? with people studying and working that much??), but it threw me off the first time I had to get my contacts here.

They range from 0 to -8.00 but with one value for the entire package, so if you have significantly different diopters in each eye e.g. -2.00 in your right and -3.00 in your left, then you may have to buy 2 packets, 1 for each eye.

#chinese studyblr #mandarin langblr #chinese langblr #chinese language #learn chinese #chinese #college #college life #student life #aesthetic #student #studyblr #study blog #study motivation #china #study in china #travel blog #slavic roots western mind #measurement

[static-scribblez]

The PS5 has been out for three years and Chris Dunne deserves one by now he deserves a PS5 the universe owes him one all of this is still this is the text this is all on the shirt the universe owes him a PS I did the math Will I did the math its it’s I did the math if if we made if we fuckin profit 10 dollars a shirt I I give you half of that I get five dollars a shirt I gotta sell 80 t-shirts in order to get a PS5 94 t-shirts if I’m including a copy of Baldur’s Gate 3 that’s doable that’s totally doable that’s all on the shirt all of this is on the shirt including this including this it’s doable I could sell 80 shirts that’s on the shirt too right this is all on the shirt okay this is all going on it’s all on the shirt that’s the shirt that’s my idea for some new merch that’s great that’s a great shirt yeah and the fun thing is that it could also be a poster or that’s true or like a mug or a drink or fucking anything I don’t know just who cares wait can you do that can you setup on the bigcartel like 12 different items all with right the same block of text on it yeah and the plan is to price all of those items I will profit enough enough to purchase a PS5 that’s a lot of items and the second I make 400 dollars they’re gone they disappear because this is a terrible thing for me to do I shouldn’t do this its so funny that’s no that’s such a good idea I just I’ve been thinking about just putting up a fucking PayPal link I’m done I need a PS5 dude that’s dude I I like I want I was just I’m fucking sitting at home just like ahhh here’s the thing I’m not gonna like fuckin I’m not gonna I I I I I don’t I don’t want to beg for money uh huh I didn’t think I wanted to beg people for money but then I took a long hard think about how badly I want a PS5 and I think I might be okay with it. I’ve been having fantasy’s about just going to target and looking at them ya know just fantasies about looking about just I just been maybe I’ll go to target or Walmart today and just look at the ps5s just to be like I could get that I could I could have one I could take it home I could take it I could just buy it today what’s stopping you then because I PS5 the price point its at right now its very dangerous because its an exact price point where I could buy it and it wouldn’t immediately ruin my life but it would make it so that my life gets ruined quicker a couple months down the line okay right which still makes it a bad purchase right yeah you know what I mean that’s kinda where I’m at okay so I say we do the t-shirt thing we make a t-shirt a mug a poster all the specific niche things that the drop shipping company that we work with prints on yeah do’m all all the printful stuff just the entire printful catalogue 50 items yeah the whole catalogue this huge block of text make socks fucking fill out the entire bigcartel page mousepads with as many items as they’ll let me put on thermoses just canvas prints every single possible literation on of it and if that bothers you there’s a very quick to get me to stop doing it just buy them you just need to be the 80th person to buy these fucking t-shirts that’s amazing can we give a prize to the 80th person who buys one uh well how much is the prize uh its its its um its you get a little sandwich kiss you and me each take a cheek and give him a little smooch alright well I’m just going to round and say its going to 40 bucks for travel expenses so that’s 8 more t-shirts we have to before we do that but then yeah sure ya know well then we just increase yeah exactly we just increase the number of t-shirts I have to sell right exactly

#babe wake up new copypasta just dropped #oh hey both of them have their own copypastas now #Chris dunne’s PS5 rant and Will Wood’s Wednesday rant #well technically it’s both will and chris speaking here and not just chris but you get my point #shitpost #life in the world to come #litwtc #chris dunne #will wood

[that-green-haired-swordsman]

„It’s Zoro’s birthday tomorrow!“ Usopp yells, looking at the calendar.

„Why didn’t he say anything? We need to buy him a present“, Chopper chimes in.

„I don’t think he’s one for a birthday present“, Franky muses. „What should we even get him?“

„A good bottle of sake“, Robin smiles. „I’m sure he’d appreciate that.“

„We’re pretty broke right now, though“, Luffy frowns. „I have just a few berries left.“ Franky, Usopp and Chopper compare their empty pockets.

„No problem!“, Nami smiles. „I could lend you some of my money!“

„You’d do that?!“ the boys shout excitedly.

„Why yes! You just need to pay me pack 400% of interests.“

„Witch!“

The boys hurl insults at an indifferent, smiling Nami.

They take the money from Nami and head to town for the sake.

„What about you? You didn’t give any of your money for the present“, Brook asks Sanji.

„I ain’t spending any berry on a present for that shitty-ass marimo“, Sanji growls and continues to cook lunch.

„I’d frown now if I had any brows and skin on my face yohohohohoho“

The others get back and decide to hide the bottle in the woman’s dormitory. Zoro’s never been there once so there’s little chance he will get there

Next day it’s Zoro’s birthday! The crew gathers in the kitchen to sing a birthday song (which Zoro seems to hate but he’s actually moved, big softie) and hand him the bottle.

„Oh wow, that looks expensive“, he remarks.

„Sure, only the best“, Luffy lies (it’s not expensive at all) (he spent most of the money for food before they even entered a liquor store)

Sanji stands there and smokes until he just disappears without a word

Crew’s murmuring and wondering about his behaviour. „Even on Zoro’s birthday…“ Chopper says downcast.

„Why would that bother me even“ Zoro shrugs (it does bother him)

Sanji comes back and brings a large tablet with a katana on it. He puts on the table.

Zoro raises a brow. The rest is excited as fuck.

„A sword?! Whoa where did you get it?" and so on

„Very funny shitty cook. That’s already my sword. What the hell even crossed your mind to steal it from me in the first place…“

„Uh, Zoro-kun. You have all of your blades“, Jimbe notices and points towards Zoro’s hip. Zoro turns his head.

„… and now act as if... you… what the…?!"

Jimbe is right. Zoro has all of his swords attached to his hip. What’s Wado then doing on the table?

Chopper’s nose twitches. „Tha-that’s not a real sword!“ he exclaims. „It smells… sweet??“

Luffy sticks his finger on the sword and pushes it inside. He draws it back and licks it. „That’s cake.“

The crew stares at Sanji who looks away.

„You made Zoro a cake that looks exactly like his favourite sword?!“ They shout excitedly.

„Shut up“ Sanji growls

Zoro cuts off a piece of it and eats it. „It’s quite alright.“

„Quite alright“, Sanji repeats. „I had to mess with the recipe because you don’t like too much sugar.“

„You must have been up all night! You’re so sweet“, Nami chirps and gives Sanji a kiss on the cheek. Sanji passes out.

„all the effort he put into it and you just say it’s alright you crude idiot“ Nami bonks Zoro on the head

Sanji recovers and they eat the cake together, and Zoro eats most of it.

☺️🎂

#one piece headcanons #monkey d. luffy #Roronoa zoro #cat burglar nami #usopp #vinsmoke sanji #zosan #nico robin #cutty flam #franky one piece #soul king brook #jimbei #tony tony chopper