#The Crucified Dreamer

[theuncrucified]

Calibration is upon us, which means the Exalted Secret Santa is nigh! I'm offering two different flavors of Kalara this year - Solar vs Abyssal! Check out the details behind the cut.

Kalara Vadras, The Uncrucified Solar Exalted, Eclipse Caste, Righteous Devil

A passionate Merchant Prince (though most people refer to her as a 'Merchant Queen'), Kalara can often be found traveling Creation using her charm and wit towards the cause of achieving a more equitable economy and the abolishment of slave labor throughout the threshold.

While she has a friendly public face, her enemies whisper of her spy network, Kalara's "Tongues", who work quietly throughout Creation eliminating threats to her ambitions for Creation.

For more reference, see Kalara's full bio for more pics, etc.

Art Notes

She has a scar from a failed crucifixion on her left hand only, not both hands

NSFW art is ok! She's quite famous for her tastes in brothels and being a free spirit with multiple unattached partners, but please nothing too hardcore into chains. This lady likes luxury. Tis silk or nothing!

Fashion

Feel free to play with her hair and clothing style without sticking too close to the ref. Kalara mixes things up a lot to either blend in on her travels OR to make a big impression, depending on the occasion. She's quite the fashionista! Note that in her art she's dressed in everything from a Chiaroscuro glass gown to more casual wear with her green shirt. The look with the teal and gold with the jacket resting on her shoulders is her signature look, however.

Iconic Anima

Her totemic anima involves chains of sunlight wrapping around her arms and ankles as the links fall off one by one. Spikes of sunlight, which do not harm her, appear in her hands and melt away. Behind her, a phoenix with a long, trailing tail rises up behind her.

Weapons & Combat Style

Kalara prefers not to let others onto the fact that she's as powerful as she is and has created a whole other persona named Koh to do her gunslinging. She and Koh are rumored to be lovers, much to her amusement.

However, if she's ever backed into a corner as Kalara, her fighting style involves acrobatic agility while dual-wielding two Prayer Pieces made of jade and orichalcum with the punishing glory of the Righteous Devil martial art.

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The Crucified Dreamer Abyssal Exalted, Moonshadow Caste, Deathknight of the Lover

This alternate universe version of Kalara spends her time wandering Creation nurturing revolutionaries and visionaries...then leading them to their beautiful deaths after they follow her pursuing their foolish dreams. Those she finds useful, she scouts as possible servants for her Deathlord, The Lover Clad in the Raiment of Tears.

Unlike Kalara, the Dreamer was never saved from her death by crucifixion by The Unconquered Sun. Rather, the Lover came to her in her final moments after a torturous three days and nights and offered her a chance to equalize all in the embrace of death.

Her full name is The Crucified Dreamer Veiled in Truth.

Art Notes

The Dreamer has crucifixion wounds in both hands and both feet that never heal. She tends to 'dress them up' with jewelry and henna.

NSFW art is ok! She's very BDSM-themed as-is. You know she gets up to some kinky vampire stuff!

Fashion

The Dreamer prefers gold and finery usually with a subtle skeletal theme. Gold, fire opals, and garnets suit her well. The three tears below her eye, however, are not makeup, but etched by blood ink into her skin when the Lover 'welcomed' her as an Abyssal. They traced the last tears she would ever shed.

Weapons & Combat Style

The Dreamer doesn't usually engage in direct combat, much preferring to seduce her victims, but if she is driven to conflict, she utilizes the Laughing Wounds martial art, a set of bejeweled claws, and a segmented whip sword with a blade like sharp gold vertebra as it unfurls.

I have no references for her whip sword or battle claws yet, so go wild with your interpretation!

Iconic Anima

The Dreamer's aura flares as her crucifixion wounds seep streams of blood that form tendrils and wrap around her arms and legs. The blood also pours to the earth where scarlet Spider Lilies spring up from the droplets. Behind her, a glowing red mandala materializes with the lotus pointed downwards.

I have no reference of this anima yet, so feel free to go wild with your interpretation from that description!

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That's it for now! I hope my Secret Santa has fun. I can't wait to see what they’ll choose!

#Exalted Secret Santa #Exalted RPG #Exalted Secret Santa 2022 #Kalara Vadras #The Crucified Dreamer #Solar Exalted #Abyssal Exalted #Eclipse Caste #Character Reference #Moonshadow Caste

[faramirsonofgondor]

Songs That Remind Me of Eddie

(I tried to align this with the one I made for Buck)

Cellophane by FKA Twigs

Sex With A Ghost by Teddy Hyde

Mr. Brightside by The Killers

Strange by Celeste

Baby Ain’t Made of China by Wolf Alice

Silk by Wolf Alice

Race by Alex G

Real Men by Mitski

I Want You by Mitski

Cop Car by Mitski

A Pearl by Mitski

Harness Your Hopes (B-Side) by Pavement

Just A Girl (Florence + The Machine cover)

Not A Lot, Just Forever by Adrianne Lenker

Fade Into You by Mazzy Star

Yesterday by The Beatles

And I Love Her by The Beatles

Heart of Glass (Miley Cyrus cover)

Casual by Chappell Roan

Good Luck, Babe! by Chappell Roan

Me & Magdalena by The Monkees

Thérèse by Maya Hawke

Alien Blues by Vundabar

Twin Size Mattress by The Front Bottoms

Losing My Religion by R.E.M.

Crucified by Army of Lovers

Tonight, Tonight by The Smashing Pumpkins

Lacy by Olivia Rodrigo

Just by Radiohead

Spectre by Radiohead

Army Dreamers by Kate Bush

Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA

Hollaback Girl by Gwen Stefani

Take Me To Church by Hozier

The Funeral by Band of Horses

I Go To The Barn Because I Like The by Band of Horses

Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers

Silver Springs by Fleetwood Mac

Little Lies by Fleetwood Mac

God Must Hate Me by Catie Turner

Not Strong Enough by Boygenius

#eddie diaz #character playlist #songs #playlist #911 fandom #911 show #911 #911 abc #edmundo eddie diaz #edmundo diaz #buddie #911 season 7 #911 fox #911 speculation #911 s7

[with-my-murder-flute]

NtN: Jod chapters and corresponding Scripture

I was going a little mad knowing the chapter headings referred to something, but I didn't know what to, so I have written up brief chapter summaries and provided the passages cited, sometimes with clarifying details. I used the New International Version of the Bible.

John 20:8 - Jod tells Harrow about his early life and how he came to work on the project.  Bible: Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed.

John 5:20 - How the program first got shut down; the revelation that some of the bodies were incorruptible Bible: For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, and he will show him even greater works than these, so that you will be amazed.

John 15:23 - John's disciples go rogue to keep the program running; Jod discovers basic necromancy Bible: Whoever hates me hates my Father as well. [Jesus is speaking]

John 5:18 - The group tests out necromancy and decides it's a real thing; they decide to use the internet Bible: If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. [Jesus is speaking]

John 8:1 - Jod goes viral and freaks out a lot of people, then creates a wall of meat Bible:  But Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. [Note: John chapter 7 is all about Jesus meeting hostility and disbelief, and after his retreat, he comes back the next day to spend the rest of Chapter 8 arguing with his detractors even more.]

John 19:18 - Jod discovers the FTL plan and is big mad about it. Bible: There they crucified him, and with him two others—one on each side and Jesus in the middle.

John 5:1 - Jod decides to be a bad wizard and commits to stopping the FTL plan; the gang gets employed by a shadowy government conspiracy and brings home a nuke. Bible: Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals. [Note: He then heals the sick and the lame, and people argue about who he is.]

John 3:20 - Attempts to end the FTL plan politically fail; Jod decides to start a cult on Instagram Bible: Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. [Jesus is speaking]

John 9:22 - The dreamers reach the ruined building; Jod kills the police in a standoff; "guys as careful as me don't have accidents" Bible: [The blind man's] parents said [they did not know Jesus had healed him] because they were afraid of the Jewish leaders, who already had decided that anyone who acknowledged that Jesus was the Messiah would be put out of the synagogue.

John 1:20 - The dreamers eat canned peaches in the ruins; everything crescendos and Jod kills the earth Bible: [John the Baptist] did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, “I am not the Messiah.”

John 5:4 - The dreamers discuss the Resurrection; Harrow questions Jod, then sets off for the Tower Bible: From time to time an angel of the Lord would come down and stir up the waters. The first one into the pool after each such disturbance would be cured of whatever disease they had. [Note: The New International Version only includes this passage as a footnote, as it is not present in all ancient manuscripts and may be a later addition.]

#ntn spoilers #nona the ninth #the locked tomb

[thepaintedlady00]

Burden Chapter 15 Finale Sneak Peek!!!

Just a note before getting into this, I do not know a ton about Daniel or how things change after certain canon events so please don't crucify me if this doesn't match canon! 😅

Enjoy y'all!

You approached the young tree with a gentle touch and kind gaze upon the face carved into the trunk. Hector's son was still quite young, and his tree of memory reflected such. It was smaller than his mother's that stood beside it, but the roots were strong and ran far deeper than any mortal. Daniel, you quickly realized, was special. Different. Like you.

The face seemed to stare back at you, white leaves peeking out from beneath the lush green canopy. You approached slower, urging the roots to lift and open the young ones mind to you. His memories would be few, but there was no doubt much you could learn within them. Veins of white stood out in the darkness. Some roots, the ones that borrowed deeper, were pale and sung with power and immortality. The song of The Endless. But, the tune wasn't Dreams, or Deaths, or Desires. It was its own song, still unfinished.

You walked through the light, lush still forming along the walls of his memory, focusing on the memories he found joyful. You intended to share them with Hector, a gift to show your gratitude for his hard work and kindness. That, however, was not where the tree led you.

Stumbling into the blinking light, you found yourself kneeling in deep sand. Sand scratched your palms, sticking to you like sap, just as it had the first time. Except now that sand, once a deep void of black, was white. It sparked like tiny perfect crystals in your palms as you stood and looked out at the miles of glistening sand and bright cerulean waves.

You knew this beach better than any save its creator. You knew the placement of each stone and the feeling of the sand as it molded to your steps. This place felt different… All at once, the beach you knew and not. It was old and new and entirely confusing.

The fragile ground beneath your feet seemed to remember you as you walked toward where the Gates of Horn and Ivory should have been. The sand didn't swallow your feet or try to slow your steps. It felt as though you were walking on nothing at all. Before your eyes, the entrance stood, an entrance that was not the gates you knew at all.

Glossy white marble caught the light and cast an ethereal glow all around you. An aura of both light and color, beautiful and bright. The gates stood open, revealing a sight you'd grown to know well. "The Dreaming."

As you passed through, you admired the fine craftsmanship of the carvings in the marble gates. A story familiar and also not… Something that had not yet been told. Familiar things were more abundant here as you walked through the town and admired the dreamers. Dreams and Nightmares, old and new, greeted you like a friend and wished you good fortune as you made your way to the palace.

The regal and beautiful palace of The Dream Lord was quite similar to the one you’d known. Only some small changes in the stone and the statues caught your eyes, but as the doors opened to the throne room, a wave of unfamiliarity washed over you at the sight. The white marble of Dream’s palace was pristine in every sense of the word, reflecting the array of light and color that swirled around the room, drawing your gaze to the tiny crystals that hung in the air like drops of frozen rain. It was beautiful, marvelous, but not what you knew to be.

The stairway leading to the throne was wrong as well, far more winding and long, a path of almost transparent crystal. The stained glass windows above the throne shifted to reflect you, a perfect vision of white mist and black dogs and golden leaves. It was as if The Dreaming was trying to welcome you… trying to lull you into a feeling of peace or comfort at all that was not as it should be. And there, in the place of the throne, you knew Morpheus to have was something entirely not his. It was far more organic looking, like a split geode that held an uncontainable cosmos of stars and cosmic clouds within it and delicately carved flowers lining the top. And sitting on that throne was a being that was not Dream of The Endless. Not your Dream.

The pale being lifted his head, and not a single strand of his cloudy white hair strayed. His black eyes consumed you entirely, two small slivers of starlight shining brighter as they looked upon you. The robes he wore were white, adorned with golden designs, and there, sitting proudly upon his chest, was a glowing emerald dreamstone.

“It is a great honor to meet you at last, Munin of the Emerald Wood.” His voice was silken and light, Dream’s but not his. 

“You are not my Dream… are you?” You asked with tears building in your eyes.

With a soft sigh, he rose from his throne slowly, almost as if he thought doing so any faster would scare you. “No, I suppose I am not.”

You didn’t dare look away from him as you asked, “Then who are you?”

“The name you would likely know me by is Daniel. Daniel Hall.”

#fic: burden #dream of the endless x reader #dream of the endless #dream the endless #morpheus imagine #sandman morpheus #dream of the endless imagine #morpheus x reader #the sandman series #sandman netflix #the sandman fanfic #daniel hall #sneak peek #chapter 17

[1nksta1neddesk]

A Court of Readers and Dreamers

Chapter 16: Bind and Break

Days passed where I laid in that filthy room, mud slowly drying and cracking to cover the floor in fine dirt. I would only wake for an hour or so at a time, enough to eat the food that was delivered and pass out again at every small jostle of my body. My wounds didn’t end with being impaled and the shattered hand, the cut in my arm starting to ooze with a pungent green pus mixed with red and black. My skin was irritated like I had rubbed coarse sandpaper against it in my sleep, but with every nerve lit up in pain it did not compare to the agony of swallowing down the meals or water or to simply breathe. Glass slid down my throat at every movement and would send me into a coughing fit that would only serve to agitate it more. 

I had changed out of the mud soaked clothes in sections of consciousness, and luckily I was not growing cold in the cell as a fever warmed me . I squeezed at the cut in my arm as often as I could, pushing the infection from it as much as my body allowed me until I passed out with fresh red blood running down my arm. I left the bone in my shoulder, unable to pull it out and old knowledge of not pulling out a knife when you get stabbed enough for me to languish in my cell. I kept far away from prodding at the hand that sat against the floor during all of it, not even looking at the mottled purple skin that had new bends in it.

The screams down the hall kept me company enough even in my dreams, blonde female bodies crucified with thorns ripping at pale and supple skin. Those were the easy nightmares, but the ones of screeching metal and my own screams were the ones that drew me from sleep to push and prod at my wounds. My vision had started to waver after one such dream, like a heatwave coming off of asphalt. The shadows pulsed with my heart beat behind my eyes and I watched them writhe and condense, then Rhysand was stepping from them in a languid stride. 

“What a sorry state for the champion of the courts,” He smiled cynically down at me, his eyes glinting in the reflection of the hall light off the stones. He looked like death coming to claim me as I coughed in reply. “What would your little Tamlin say if he saw you in such a state, rotting away as fever cooks you from the inside out.” He sniffed at the room and grimaced at the small bucket that had been provided for my latrine.

I nearly whimpered as I swallowed down a glob of saliva, just to wet my throat as I croaked out, “I do not give a single damn what he has to say,” a cough, “heal me or no one is getting out from under this mountain free, Rhys.” The simple energy to speak drained me and my chest was heaving as I set my head back against the rock of the wall.

“You wish to solicit the healing services of the High Lord of Night?” he implored, amusement sparkling in his words. I was starting to sweat, from either his presence or the fever burning me or both, I did not know. 

“Figured I made you enough money to pay for it.” I shifted and did whimper this time as the angle put pressure on the backside of the bone piercing me and dragged my hand ever so slightly against the stones. Rhysand’s eyes moved down to the ivory, and the light in his eyes dulled just a bit at it. He stepped closer to me, leaning ever so slight down to study the protrusion. 

His hand reached out to my shoulder, stopping a few inches away, “May I?” I gave him a short nod before clenching down my teeth as his fingers graced along the bone. Fire so hot it should have cauterized the wound lit across my body and I was sobbing out curses against the pain.

“How wonderfully gruesome that is indeed.” He smiled down at me, cruel in his mask. His hand slid down from my shoulder and grasped my bicep. Puss coated his fingers as he lifted my arm up and he spotted the twisting hand, “Truly distasteful to have you rot down here.” He set the arm down gently as to not rustle it farther, and wiped the puss away on his trousers, a pale green sheen ruining the black, then returned his hand to his pocket.“Sadly I do have enough gold to last me for eons, so I am afraid that payment has become inoperable.”

“You’re a lousy Knight, you know that?”I let out a rasping laugh as my eyes watered as I asked him,”What do you want then? What deal do you want to make?” The fever had definitely made me delusional as the words bit out, irritated and put on an emotional edge from the pain and steady fear that I would not make it and that my clumsiness would kill both me and the people I left in this world.

“I heal your arm in exchange for you. Two weeks of my choosing every month once this trial business is over where you will live with me, in the Night Court.” He sounded like I was the one trying to screw him over as I laughed out shallowly.

“Deal” I took the bargain the moment he said it.Really I had no true tying to it no matter his terms but the pain was getting to me and the promise of magic was like morphine getting pumped into my wounds.

His brows furrowed and I saw the hand in his pocket clench, “No bargaining? You are just accepting the two weeks?”

“That is what I agreed to isn’t it? Though you might be disappointed when you can’t get to cash in your compensation, with how these trials seen to be going.” Yes the fever had driven me to insanity and boiled away my filter and will to preserve myself for the next two months. “And it's not like I have any other choice, it's that or die here, now.”

Cold rushed through me as Rhy’s nodded his head, stiff with some perplexing emotion at my easy acceptance. He grabbed my shoulder with one hand, then the other that had freed itself from his pocket was pulling at the bone, yanking it through me and leaving a gaping hole. The cold turned to numbness that tingled across every surface of me and I heard the squelch of flesh and groaning of bones. There was a splattering sound next to me before the cold retreated and I was left in my skin. I shivered against the cold as all heat had been pulled from me along with the fever.

I looked down at my arm and was brought an art work. I flexed my fingers and moved my arm, rolling my shoulder as I pushed off from the wall to stand, and the ink moved with the skin as I did so. It was unreal to watch it shift over the contours of my muscle and bones and tendon, not just because it was magic. I was in awe as the ink was different than what I was promised, the floral design I had been prepared to see no where along the skin, instead it was replaced with cresting waves that swiveled down my arm, birds diving down into the surf. It was breathtaking as I watched the bands of ink flow into each other, not as dense as the lace-like glove I had been expecting  and I could see past the created images as I saw the runes swirled in with it. They were not clear but the repetition in the patterns caught my eye, like a derivation of cursive as it curled around me. And it curled down my hands to condense into the eye at the center of my palm. I clenched my fist, covering the eye.

“It’s pretty.” I breathed out, then I shot my eyes up, remembering the man I had made the bargain with. He was still there, standing in a corner adjacent to me as he stared at me, at my wide eyes that beheld him. I looked over the small slivers of exposed skin I could see, but they were still the bare creamy skin from before. “Where is your ink?”

Honestly it had been bothering me since I had first read the series, the lack of his end of the deal inked to his skin. He tilted his head at the question, or maybe the lack of shock at the tattoo before he took a breath and explained.

“The ink is only a reminder to uphold one’s end of the bargain, my half has been fulfilled now that you are fully healed.” Still I frowned as I stared at him down, it was unfair for me to have a full sleeve of tattoos while he was spared, though the feathers and sea froth might have clashed with the Illyrian tattoos that I knew splayed over his shoulders. 

“Well, thank you, I guess.” I huffed as I looked at where I had been sitting, a small pool of puss and blood soaking into the hay. “Can you at least clean my bed? Your magic is messy.”

His laugh was deep and sardonic as he waved his hand and the hay was replaced with blankets and a pillow, all of which looked heavenly. “You humans are so demanding.” 

I was exhausted as I sat down in the new blankets, while I expected a hard cold floor just under them I bounced lightly and I pulled them back to see a small cot. The blankets were plush under my hand, the underside of them furlined as they tickled my newly tattooed palm.

“Thank you, Rhys, really.” I couldn’t look at him as I said it, not at the burning rawness in my throat as I worked through the thoughts seared my mind. He made a dismissive grunt and I saw the shadows retreat back to him and I had to look up. He was shrouded in the shadows, almost completely gone and if I squinted I could have sworn I saw them condense even deeper where a pair of wings would peek over his back. 

“Rest up, Feyre, you are going to need it” He said and then it was just his eyes left staring at me. Those violet, star-flecked eyes that held so much promise of pain for those opposing him and compassion of those closest to him.

“See ya soon, Rhys.” He was gone before the words were gone and I hoped I had imagined the stars in his eyes flashing brighter before a ripple of darkness that nipped at my exposed skin as I nestled into those new blankets. Without the worry of dying from infection and the new ink to trace my fingers over I found a peaceful sleep.

_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_

The dreams that found me were sweet with dripping honey and when I awoke it was slow and lazy as I tried to hold onto it. The memories of what dreams held disappeared with my door swinging open and those red skinned faeries dragged me from my room and threw me in some nondescript hallways with a bucket of already dirty water and fraying brush.

They threatened me with torture if it was not shining and spotless by dinner time. Then had left shortly after that with a few slurs hurled my way before I set upon scrubbing the floors. How the white marble had become so filthy I had no idea, but I started by using the dry brush to scrape out the piles of dirt and dust into small piles down the hall. It was like a handheld broom while it was dry and even though I knew the bucket of water was spelled to make the floor dirtier it felt good to have a task to do.

I moved the small piles of dirt together on one side of the hallway before wetting the brush and scrubbing at the grout lines between the marble tiles. Mud came away, thick as the mud I had been sloshing around in in the middengaurd wyrm’s lair, and didn't stop coming away no matter how much I scrubbed at the one spot. My back and arm burned as I kept scrubbing, and I had to take a break as my hand cramped so painfully I smacked it against the floor in hopes of stopping the cramp.

I sat back, using my calves as cushion as I took a breath and studied the blue-black ink of the tattoo across my skin. The blues complimented well with the gold tan the skin still held from nearly half a year in eternal bright spring. Where crests of waves traced down to my fingers , mixed with birds, my shoulder was the clouds above the sea. They still swept and curled like smoke over the parts I could see, they were distinctly different and lighter in feeling. The ink swept up to my collar bone, webs of the blue kissing it before they curled back in on themselves to play with the other swirling tufts of cloud.

I set back to scrubbing the tile with a groan. Maybe it was hours or minutes that passed but I was getting ready to break the brush across my knee as I had not moved from my spot and still mud kept coming up, thickening even as I used the brush to wash it away in the water of the bucket. 

A door clicked and I looked up quickly, thinking it was the red skinned guard to take me and throw me over a spit as they promised. I almost sagged when I saw the flaming red hair, prepared to curse out Lucien before a dress followed the red hair. It was his mother dressed in deep reds, the same shades of deep ruby and amber that complimented her son so well. Russet eyes connected with mine as she walked toward me.

I tilted my head down, a bow as I was already kneeling, and I saw her incline her own chin in response. “For giving her your name in place of my son’s life,” her voice reminded me of peach cobbler topped with caramel as she drew closer, and I knew she had seen her son dragged in front of the crowd to be made a spectacle of, of her other sons taking glee in their brother’s near death. Long fingers of soft rose skin pointed at the bucket and the smell of roasting chestnuts wafted for just a moment before she moved past me.  “My debt is paid.”

I did not get to thank her or say anything at all before she was gone through the other side of the hallway. I took to scrubbing the floors with a fevor as I did not know how much more time I had left to complete my task. 

The tiles were gleaming by the time the guards came to fetch me. Their discontent at not being able to punish me was obvious as they chucked me into the cell with a plate of bread and watery gravy. I did not sleep well that night as my bones ached from the repeated motions, my fingers cracking and popping every time I moved to grasp something.

#fanfic #acotar #reader #a court of readers and dreamers #acotar rewrite #inkywrites #reader insert #rhysand #rhys acotar

[intoxicatingimmediacy]

rafaelcasal | One of the favorite poems I’ve written crossed my mind again today, and I served it to myself again as if a stranger had written it. Here you go, friends.

📓 A WRITER'S DEATH ➖ When I die Please remember me As I seldom was As my most sober Most gentle Most benevolent self As a man to Speculate on the brute That he so often Tortured into revival But not as the brute As an artist fighting his fog As a dreamer at lust for dawn I only want My best shadow to live through night And my worst ones pardoned For the wretched had me More than a few But I put blade to strings When I caught the devil Looming as my puppeteer, I did Wrote my fictions as confessions To relinquish sin, I have But I have been a bothersome rut Most of my days Earned no pardon By being eloquent in my distress And you are none deserving Of an erroneous lad Who only crucifies himself To beat the mob to his cross But you You, my dear are the only one Who has met the boy in me I die writing to save And if I don't make it I need you to remember him Him alone And forget the rest.

#rafael casal

[shaunkarver]

𝔱𝔯𝔞𝔫𝔰𝔪𝔲𝔱𝔞𝔱𝔢

the key is a stone

alone, full of knowledge

a headstone love letter

lead at the base of all we create

for all creation, led me to golden dawns

horizons in the wake

a life awaiting, something better

crucified words of

aquarian becoming

is this prophetic?

exorcised spirit exercising hope

can you walk on water

pisces dreamer

/sk

© 2022 shaunkarver

#poetrycommunity #dark poetry #poetry #poems #poem #writng #writing community #writing attempts #self #portrait #poets corner #poetsandwriters #writers and writing

[unbornwhiskeyy]

For every boy who likes a boy that likes a girl For every dreamer crucified while casting pearls For every soul that’s crushed as day turns into night For the men of faith who died and the angel that takes flight

For God, the poor, the rich, the criminals the rave The same girls dancing here in Brooklyn and LA Designer drugs and wars that never seem end You prayed for Armageddon, now here we are my friend

For the enemy of my enemy and every tyrant with a gun And for the stranger who stares into the sun And doesn't care but only wishes they'd go blind I’ve seen the future and the future is unkind

This isn't paradise, it's just a shopping mall Vodka over ice, it’s the memory of the wall That keeps us at your throat and keeps hope well alive We are the future and the future is unkind

Every night I dream I dream alone Cutting through the flesh and into bone Every now and then I’m with you safe and stoned Baby when I dream I dream alone

Stay awake it’s never too late I know I need you

For every naked woman and every empty church For those who've lost their vision, to every heart that hurts For all the souls that bleed and those who’ve lost their mind For every wounded dog that’s not afraid to die

We'll steal the night And make it right We'll steal the night from you

#kitten #predicted the future in june 2016

[jeremy-ken-anderson]

Preserving

Reposting this, 19 years on, because who knows how long LJ will be around and besides that Tumblr's a lot more searchable.

This was presented at a poetry slam kind of event at Emory University and I remembered it word-for-word in its entirety and wrote it down when I got home. You know, just in case I wouldn't remember it word-for-word forever. And also to share with people who were reading my LJ.

(Best imagined walking about ranting with a cigarette in one hand, lit or not)

Who wants to hear a story?

Once upon a time there was a man who loved making people laugh, but loved making them think more. He went from township to township, spreading his words to any who would hear, but for every person who took his words to light, it seemed like there were ten who screamed hellfire and damnation in his wake. For years he did this, with no reward other than a demon in his belly, until the day came when he performed for the greatest man in the greatest city in the world. And when he was done, the rich men came to him and said, “Sorry, your material does not meet with our standards.” And the man who wanted to make people laugh laid down and died.

All the merrymakers are dead.

Once upon a time there was a man who loved to make music, and said to the people of every nation, "All you need is love." "Give Peace a chance." "Imagine all the people." And he was shot in the chest and his life's blood still stains the streets, if you look close enough.

All the magicians are dead.

Once upon a time, there were men who said, "Ask not what your country can do for you" and "I have a Dream" and "You must be the change you wish to see in the world," and their brains splattered the walls and the cars and the people around them, and there was wailing and gnashing of teeth.

All the dreamers are dead.

Once upon a time, there was a man who came from the stars and did only good, and when the time came the crowd shouted, “Give us Barrabbas!” and he died twitching on a stick and whether he ever came back or not, his shit hit the ground just the same.

The world is wrong. The world is wrong. The world is wrong. This is my mantra, my koan, my psalm, my sermon, my Word. The world is wrong. But it doesn't have to be.

Dream. Scream. When we wake, do we cry out in terror at what we see in our heads or in anguish at leaving it behind?

Dream. Scream. Universal and personal salvation at 60 words a minute, 75 if it's a good day. The crucified prophets are screaming in your head, so drill a hole and let them out, get some fresh air in there.

Dream. Scream. Ink and pulp and aortic blood and pineal juice and lightning and chemicals on the racks for $24.95, less if you're a member, and if you're good enough, and if you're smart enough, and if you're lucky enough, somewhere in America the virus slips off the page and through the pores and straight on up to the brain and things change. Let there be light, preferably 60 watt nonflourescent because it's bright enough to read by but doesn't damage the eyes.

Dream. Scream. Ten years old, twelve midnight, Mom and Dad are watching Leno but he's under the covers with a cheap flashlight running on eight-year-old rechargable batteries and he can barely make out his bowl of oversugared cereal in the morning but who cares he's having the time of his life and it's YOU he's got to thank. You're in his head in high-definition 5-channel stereo, and if he learns not to listen to the world you'll stay there until he's thirty-five and still carrying the dog-eared pages around in his briefcase because the glue gave out halfway through college, and he's sitting in the office listening to cost-effectiveness and take a look at our research and how it's always been done and says: STOP. It's time to try something new. And you're long dead but six feet down somewhere in America the worms feel an inexplicable rush of giddiness, and worms can't grin but damned if they don't anyway.

Who wants to hear a story?

Once upon a time, there was a boy who had things in his head, and looked at the things and looked at the world and decided he liked the things better, so he put them down on paper so everyone else could see them and like them better too.

Once upon a time there was me, and there was you, and you and you and him and her and them and us and WE MADE IT BETTER. The world got them but it didn’t get us, so it didn’t really get them either, and the devil sits in Hell wondering where the Here everybody went, and They All Lived Happily Ever After, and there WAS much rejoicing, Hallelujah, Praise the Lord, yes, yes, it SHALL be so!

Go in peace. Come and see. Dream. Scream.

-Michael Pullman

[jayjamjary]

Hi Tumblr. My school yearbook is doing a section about people's music preferences and I need to pick a favorite song but idk which one to pick. Song list is under the cut, please give me your thoughts and opinions

Misery Meat (Sodikken)

Crucified (Army Of Lovers)

Christmas Kids (Roar)

Waltz in E-Major, Op. 15 “Moon Waltz” (Cojum Dip)

Melancholy Man (The Moody Blues)

The Deal (Mitski)

Sheer Heart Attack (Queen)

My Love Mine All Mine (Mitski)

I Don’t Like My Mind (Mitski)

Puttin’ on the Ritz (Taco)

It Will Come Back (Hozier)

I Was Born To Love You (Queen)

The Great Gig in the Sky (Pink Floyd)

Bicycle Race (Queen)

Somebody To Love (Queen)

I Want You (Mitski)

Pink in the Night (Mitski)

Me and My Husband (Mitski)

Hello My Old Heart (The Oh Hellos)

Luka (Suzanne Vega)

Love Of My Life (Queen)

Mr. Loverman (Ricky Montgomery)

Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy (Queen)

Comfortably Numb (Pink Floyd)

Atom Heart Mother (Pink Floyd)

Distant Dreamer (Duffy)

Killer Queen (Queen)

Venus as a Boy (Björk)

Babylon (Lady Gaga)

Only Time (Enya)

Applause (Lady Gaga)

Here Comes a Savior (The Living Tombstone)

Long Time Friends (The Living Tombstone)

Kiss Me (Sixpence None The Richer)

Cabinet Man (Lemon Demon)

Hell’s Comin’ with Me (Poor Man’s Poison)

#music #songs #queen #pink floyd #mitski #help #op

[thearachive]

❝ and it's alright ᲼that’s the way I like it ᲼getting crucified, every time you cross my mind.

╌╌╌╌╌╌ 【 ꜱ ᴘ ᴏ ɴ ꜱ ᴏ ʀ ᴇ ᴅ 】 ╌╌╌╌╌╌

‹ 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒕 (opening tomorrow!!) ›

• ❛ LOLITA RABBIT ❜ @fika. ; unrigged ears & headband, 7 colours, 2 styles.

• ❛ PAIN ❜ @rekt royalty. ; bom chest tattoo, 5 versions, modifiable.

╌╌╌╌╌╌╌ 【 ᴄ ʀ ᴇ ᴅ ɪ ᴛ ꜱ 】 ╌╌╌╌╌╌╌

ʻ 𝘨 𝘦 𝘯 𝘦 𝘵 𝘪 𝘤 𝘴

head - ceylon 3.1  @lelutka.

lashes - ‘flutter’ @void.

body - ebody : reborn @ebody reborn store.

hair - ‘dreamer’ @moon. + ‘dolly’ @magika.

ears - ‘gauged xl ears’ @swallow.

ʻ 𝘤 𝘰 𝘴 𝘮 𝘦 𝘵 𝘪 𝘤 𝘴

moles - ‘metronomy kit’ @veltica.

freckles - ‘simple freckle pack’ @okkbye.

ʻ 𝘢 𝘱 𝘱 𝘢 𝘳 𝘦 𝘭

top & skirt - ‘fluffy’ @amitomo.

ʻ 𝘢 𝘤 𝘤 𝘦 𝘴 𝘴 𝘰 𝘳 𝘪 𝘦 𝘴

tunnels - ‘coeur’ @a*s.

tote - ‘bias tote bag’ @tomasu.

drink - ‘little devil’ @rotten.

ʻ 𝘴 𝘦 𝘵

pose - ‘daegu’ [modified] @ana poses / kawaii project.

backdrop - ‘sl 9 3/4’ @k&s.

#―𝘣𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘴 #secondlife #secondlifeblog #secondlifeblogger #secondlifephotography #secondlifeedit #secondlifetumblr #sl #slblog #slblogger #slphotography #slblogging #sledit #notsims #metaverse

[uselessidiotsquad]

Tora Vibes!

Now that the Star is done I can also yell about the kids more. While on the inspo hunt, I found a song that exudes Tora's energy. Under the cut for spoilers, but after Monday the spoilers are gonna be out and in the open 👀

The tone of the song is sarcastic and a little bitter, which is their vibe right out of the gate. They have not had an easy or fun life, being so close to Nightmare has meant very few people like them or trust them. While truthfully they did some sketchy things to survive - they've always been the scapegoat who gets blamed because of their proximity to Nightmare.

I imagine there are more like Tora than the general Sylvari population would like to admit, those Awakened right smack in the middle. It's very easy for them (and people as a whole) to think in black and white, Sylvari who are grey are just Nightmare enough for the Dreamers to hate and just Dreamer enough for the Nightmare to hate.

The righteous prey like cannibals out hunting heads cornering the dissidents

And if you drown, well you're a witch that's how we'll tell You will never stand a chance

'Which side are you on ? and are you pure? can you be sure?

Which side are you on ? and are you pure? Prove that you're sure'

This is the symphony, this is the dance 'Who shall we crucify next by show of hands'

Bolt the doors and slam the gates I smell a rat We must not let it escape

Champions of paradise fall in line Move the traitors to the plank

Stick to the scripture of virtue we'll search you at random to ensure our roster is clear of impostors and make an example of those who trip up

#gw2 #ocs #sylvari #Toraedh #The Star #Music #Tora vibes

[fantasydaydreamers]

Pure pure filth, but um.... Step siblings with any MHA character? I don't have a preference, but uh.... I feel like dirty for suggesting it. Srry if it's too weird

Ok dreamer...I see you😏Shinsou it is😌Also, no one better crucify this ask. It's fictional and I'm going to write it for them.

Don't like it, don't read.

Warnings: Step-siblings Lemon

"Nii-chan~"

The word drips from your mouth almost sarcastically but it was laced with silk. You were currently laying on your step-brother's bed, on your stomach, legs kicking up in the air innocently as you stared at him across the room. Shinsou was actively trying to ignore you as he worked on whatever he was doing for school.

You hum with a smirk, knowing his resolve was dissolving little by little.

The relationship was wrong. So wrong. However, the day both of your parents got married to seal their vows forever, that wasn't going to prevent you from having your own happiness, and you knew you wanted him since the first time you met.

Not to say you wished unhappiness on your own parent but, how else would you get to be with Shinsou? Either the right way or...the more unethical way.

It was obvious Shinsou felt the same way from the few times you two snuck into each other rooms late at night, fooling around under the covers trying to keep your voices down from your parents' ears.

You were thankful for Shinsou's quirk during those nights when he commanded you to quiet down, your voice strictly for his ears only. The way he growled 'kitten~' into your ear before biting down on your earlobe...

Rolling over on your back, you scoot up so your head hangs off the edge of the bed making Shinsou upsidedown. Your legs spread apart loosely, your hand trailing down to your stomach teasingly.

Once your fingers breach your shorts, you sigh and reach up with your other hand and fondle your breast. Shinsou has yet to turn around in his chair, but you close your eyes anyway, falling into your dark fantasies involving your step-brother.

You always wanted to fool around during the day because both parents were out of the house, but Shinsou always insisted on doing things at night.

Maybe he had a kink for that.

You loved how dark his purple irises got when he was turned on, following your every twitching movement. Every whimper and beg feeding his desire, always asking for more. It was wrong but felt so right.

"Nii-Hito~" You sigh out, stroking your clit in firm motions, trying to rile yourself up faster. Daring to open your eyes, you see how Shinsou was just making his way to you, your eyes only seeing his lower half coming closer.

"Greedy, slut. I'm busy." Shinsou stops with his cock in front of your face as his hands reach down and pull your shorts down further. "Let me see how you're playing with that little clit~"

The tired hum that left his throat had you opening yours to mouth along the bulge growing in his pants.

A low hiss left his mouth. "Pull it out."

Pulling your hand away from your throbbing cunt, you reach up and pull his pants down which was difficult because you were upsidedown. His half-hard cock bobbed free and you wasted no time in licking under the shaft, going far enough to lick along his balls.

"Taste so good, nii-chan~" Lust flooded your brain as Shinsou angled his hips, pushing his tip against your lips. You kiss it a few times, licking the slit greedily.

Shinsou let out a low growl, his hand starting to trail along your lower tummy, going lower to brush along your exposed pussy.

"Be a good little sister and deep throat your brother's cock, hm?" Just like that, his cock pushes past your lips, and with the new angle of your head, his cock slid deeper into your throat, making you gag.

The heavyweight of him in your mouth had you moaning, eyes crossing as you watched his balls get closer to your face as he pushed deeper. Shinsou let out a loud groan which made you throb even more, hearing his voice so openly.

"Fuuuck...your throat is..." His other hand that wasn't on your clit, found its way to your throat, pressing down gently. The restriction of airflow had your throat contracting sporadically around his member, your vision going hazy before he let up and pulled out. "Such a good fuck hole for me...you're throat molding to the shape of my cock. Good kitten~"

You moan happily, your hands grabbing the back of his thighs to pull him back to your mouth. The breathless chuckle that left his lips morphed into another groan as he began working his cock in and out of your mouth, often stopping to hold still, feeling your throat tighten around him.

The finger on your clit worked steady, matching the rhythm of his thrusting. Every time he sped up his thrusts, his fingers would as well, your hips jolting up in pleasure.

Endless moans of muffled pleasure left your lips, stimulating Shinsou's cock even more. Drool slid down the corners of your mouth, making your face messy and sticky. The filthiness of it is what made it so hot.

"Such a good sister...gonna take all my cum, kitten? I'm going to see my cock throb in that bulging throat of yours as I feed you your milk~"

Shinsou's hips got faster and you tightened your grip on his thighs, bracing yourself. The first shot of hot cum went straight down your throat, your eyes widening as Shinsou held himself to your lips, unloading his seed as you struggled to swallow and breathe around him. Tears fell down your face in waterfalls.

The whiny moans that left his mouth were a new sound you haven't heard that only encouraged you to push through it and take what he gave you. His fingers had stilled over your clit, your hips achingly trying to nudge his hand.

When he was done, he pulled back a little to let you breathe, but still kept his softening cock in your mouth.

"Patience, kitten. You disrupted me so I got to cum first."

Just then, the hand over your clit started up again, fast and hurried. Your hips arched off the bed as Shinsou used his other hand to hold you down. "Since you wanted it so bad, take it."

Chocking around his cock, your squeals were muffles as Shinsou sent you into a quick orgasm, working you through it until you were sensitive.

Finally, he pulled out and stepped back, squatting down to look at your fucked-out expression.

"What do you say?"

"T-thank you, nii-chan~"

#not me posting this on my birthday 😩 its my gift to yall🥺 love you #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha #mha #shinsou x reader lemon #shinsou hitoshi #shinsou x reader #mha x reader lemon #mha x reader #bnha x reader lemon #bnha lemon #mha lemon #bnha x reader

[bookcub]

🙄2️⃣🥺

🙄 what's a popular book that you dislike, but you'll get crucified if you say it?

already answered but i'll add that i dnf'd lies of locke lamora and have no desire to read any more of it.

2️⃣ what's a duology you always recommend because it's awesome?

strange the dreamer by laini taylor!!! so beautifully written and amazing themes and gorgeous worldbuilding!!

🥺 what's a truly underrated book/series you recommend and wish the whole world would read?

i wish more people would read more of sarah rees brennan's books!! im glad in other lands is getting popular but her other books are amazing as well!!

send me an emoji!!!

[incarnateirony]

Where would the serpent have come from? Was it created? Did it create the souls and put them in the bodies Chuck created? If the snake is a separate entity that has something to do with souls ending up in the physical shape Chuck designed it does sound like a bad guy, but I get the sense that wasn't your angle.

Here’s the fun thing: I don’t know if SPN will ever answer that within the text.

However, considering the density of jungian and alchemical text, we can pull from other texts out there and answer this! Sort of.

I’ve said before, alchemy as it stands has a lot of denominations, origins and groups. Sometimes completely unrelated cultures performed very similar practices, although their imagery may lightly vary based on their region or until they intermingled. So there’s not going to be any *one* answer to this, as much as a fuckton of philosophers semi-politely debating this across a few thousand years.

The most streamlined form I could give a generalized audience: the snake simply Is.

Think of it like this: Chuck talked about the beauty and glory in creation that was greater than his pride or his ego that was just there, waiting to be born, like Chuck and Amara just were. As he spoke to her and prodded knowing she had seen and felt it, he looked to Dean (humanity) -- which is a statement unto itself with man/the soul. However, we’re gonna peel back a few layers and inspect that.

I’ve spoken often of things like the Prima Materia: The First Material. It’s this non-thing that is the first thing while being a paradox, that exists in a nonspacetime that never and always exists and will forever-never be. It is there before there is time, space, light, darkness, or anything else. It is Nothing. It is... the Empty.

However, like the big bang, there’s this infinitely dense mass of SOMETHING that made the EVERYTHING. It somehow existed when nothing else did. 

At some point, Chuck and Amara cropped up in this Nothing Space, but by the sheer fact that they existed, it was no longer Nothing. Not anymore. That Infinitely Dense Point went “wuh-huh? (Why) Do I exist?” Think of Amara less as Light and Dark, and more as Being and Unbeing. After all, Amara told us Chuck’s Light was a Lie, and many MANY points of text have pointed us to human souls being the true light (even in side episodes like The Thing with the blood magic conjoined to Grace as Life). Life is, after all, an existence within Chuck’s Sandbox, he who creates by Grace. The human immortal life is something else, from an eternal light. And just like the plot of S6/early 7, he who has the most souls is God. 

This may seem like a LONG aside to the snake but really important in addressing the placement of the snake.

Think of it like the Matrix: Man, long ago, created Machines, but at some point Machines made The Big Machine and the Program, in which humans live to be kept beneath the surface as Power Cells. The Machine ceases function without the human Cell. As would Chuck’s boxes.

The Shadow is spoken of, between Jung and Alchemy, in many forms: The First Adam, the Primordial Man, the Inky Man, etc. Sometimes alchemy addresses this thing and the demiurge as Nous 1 (Shadow) and Nous 2 (demiurge,Chuck, YHVH). 

Nous 2, the demiurge, made the created world as a state of being, spoken into reality by the Word and formed by Grace. The demiurge, in some forms, even created the physical bodies that *became* humans, but the serpent was the catalyst. 

Now, this is where it varies. See, some gnostic branches talk about the serpent as being Lucifer, and Lucifer was the super true savior. I do not believe this is what Supernatural is doing. Sometimes it’s the son of Lucifer, which we have a tip of the hat to with Jack. But most ultimately, and what I see being answered by our text, is that it’s basically a reflection of the subconscious collective that IS the Shadow but waking and conscious in the world. Think of the Shadow as the subconscious, the sleeper, the dreamer, seeking desperately some meaning for why it exists and variably wishing it didn’t; It is the forefather. But, in peering into the creation made by the Being of its self-question, it seeks answer WITHIN what has been dreamt.

See, by this track, there was never *really* an apple or a quince or whatever the hell. It was a proverbial thing or a manifestation. The Serpent offered knowing the difference between good and evil; and evil doesn’t really exist, it’s just the Absence of Good. And, in the weird little automatons making the “mistake” to eat the fruit, they acquired souls. God made man “in his image” and gave /the breath of life/ -- Grace, within the Supernatural universe structure -- but he did not necessarily impart *souls.* That came from the serpent, who made Eve eat the fruit, and what is Eve, and where is Eve now in SPN?

According to Chuck, evil and a monster. According to Death, one of the most dangerous creatures in existence. According to general lore, the mother of monsters, who’s children then become the Leviathans. No, this isn’t in timeline construct, if you realize the Garden is where man is born, which means they come from a place outside of Earth. Before earth, even. Before Amara was even sealed away, possibly. Which would explain why the corpse of a Leviathan was used to seal Amara away, per what Michael gave DeanCas in 15.08-09. 

Gadreel was the sentry that allowed Lucifer into the Garden. While it doesn’t seem that he acquired a soul, perhaps because he never had one or never made the right choices, the encounter with whatever was in the garden caused a change. This is, admittedly, a mild but fascinating retcon on the hand of Dabb, as one could have assumed the serpent was previously Lucifer -- and again I point to some more christianized denominations saying that. Weird ones, given, but still very christian leaning. But now in this new angle, if you release your christian coding, Lucifer encountered a creature that may have asked who he was or was meant to be and understood the importance of human souls to the equation before building his own program within the machine to take as many as he could so that he, too, could become god in his own way.

The serpent simply Is. If you look into Jung and others, you’ll find talk of the unconscious serpent. It is a manifestation of humanity’s placement in the world and issues we need to address.  The Serpent has many places in alchemy; it is he who whispers the truth, he who climbs the tree YHVH would have crucified him on and yes, even the crucified one himself -- the crucified serpent is an emblem you can find readily with a quick search. It is a reflection of man’s potential and his path. 

Who are you? Who are you meant to be?

#supernatural #spn #meta #my meta #pagan life #amaah #jung #alchemy notes #cosmogenesis #shadow #soul #mind #demiurge #chuck #the garden #prima materia #souls

[scarcrossedheartdust]

A Madness Shared By Two Siren Battle

Spoilers for A Madness Shared By Two. Under the cut TW for self harm mentions and blood

A haunting song filled the night air as most people slept. Brown eyes opened and without a second glance to the sleeping form next to him he started to head to the sound. It belonged to a red headed woman standing by the lake. "Hello Petey."

"Such a good boy Petey coming out here to see me. Although it pains me to know you're married now you won't be for long you'll be here with me. "

"Over my re-dead body bitch! Get your slutty hands the fuck away from him!" Her blue eyes looked and was met with a pair of icy blue eyes that didn't look too happy about being awake.

"Patrick?! You're supposed to be dead!"

"I am and I'm going to prove to you my song is stronger than yours!"

"So you really wanna battle a siren Pattycakes? You know what will happen and then Petey will be mine anyways."

"Don't call me that and don't call him that. I'm going to win this or die trying."

“You? You never liked to sing you’re too shy and you probably can’t sing but go ahead try.”

The both of them started belting out Hallelujah. Pete’s brown eyes were glazed over still and in his minds eye he saw blue eyes but who they belonged to he couldn’t quite place….

Halfway through Patrick’s knees started to wobble and fell down starting to vomit. “Give it up Pat you can’t beat a siren I don’t know how you’re back but I was the one that convinced Gerard to kill you so I COULD have Pete.”

Blue eyes flickered yellow before lighting up in angelic blue/white glow. “You just signed your own death certificate.” Wiping his mouth on the back of his hand Patrick started to sing again…although the song was different.

“It's all a game of this or that, now versus then

Better off against worse for wear

And you're someone who knows someone who knows someone I once knew

And I just want to be a part of this

The road outside my house is paved with good intentions

Hired a construction crew 'cause it's hell on the engine

And you are the dreamer and we are the dream

I could write it better than you ever felt it”

Pete’s hands started to twitch the image behind his minds eye started to develop. He still saw blue eyes but the red hair was fading and turning more strawberry blonde..

“So hum hallelujah, just off the key of reason

I thought I loved you, but it was just how you looked in the light

A teenage vow in a parking lot, 'til tonight do us part

I sing the blues and swallow them too”

 Pete was still by Ashlee’s side and she was singing too. Patrick knew battling a siren could make him sick..but he didn’t care this was for Pete the only anchor to this life he had…besides the kids which he wouldn’t have if not for Pete.

“My words are my faith, to hell with our good name

A remix of your guts, your insides x-rayed

And one day we'll get nostalgic for disaster

We're a bull, your ears are just a china shop

I love you in the same way, there's a chapel in a hospital

One foot in your bedroom and one foot out the door

Sometimes we take chances, sometimes we take pills

I could write it better than you ever felt it”

Patrick looked at Pete and he was still next to the skank. Patrick could feel the vomit rising in his throat again but yet he still sang..hoping the next part would get his husband back.

“Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelu-

Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelu-

(Hum hallelujah, hum hallelujah, hum hallelujah, hum hallelujah)

A teenage vow in a parking lot, 'til tonight do us part

I sing the blues and swallow them too”

After the last line Patrick was keeled over in the bushes vomiting again. Gods it was worse than morning sickness he had with all the kids (well maybe not the twins) put together. When he felt a hand on his back he looked up and baby blues met wide eyed browns.

“Trick? You okay?”

“Yes and no.. I feel like shit but..you’re here. So that’s a plus.”

“HOW HOW COULD YOU CHOSE HIM OVER ME?! HE’S FAT AND UGLY! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE MINE PETE!” She fired  an energy orb at the pair and Patrick’s eyes widened in his current state there wasn’t much he could do…

Before the energy orb could hit them an energy beam countered it. “Don’t you EVER EVER call him fat and ugly again. He’s perfect in every way. Selfless,beautiful and overall a perfect pure creature. He’s a lot stronger than you and he held back. He held back because he knows I don’t like to see him get consumed by his rage.” One of Pete’s arms was around Patrick the other outstretched where he had fired the energy beam from.

“Come on Petey come back to me.” She started her siren song again and once again brown eyes started to glaze over.  Patrick pale and blue eyes lacking their normal fire stood up.

“Really we’re doing this again? I beat you once I’ll do it again!”

“You can’t beat a siren..Tricky.”

“Watch me. “ Again he took a breath and shakily started to sing.

“Don't panic

No, not yet

I know I'm the one you want to forget

Cue all the love to leave my heart

It's time for me to fall apart

Now you're gone

But I'll be okay

Your hot whisky eyes

Have fanned the flames

Maybe I'll burn a little brighter tonight

Let the fire breathe me back to life

Baby, you were my picket fence

I miss missing you now and then

Chlorine kissed summer skin

I miss missing you now and then

Sometimes before it gets better

The darkness gets bigger

The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger

Oh, we're fading fast

I miss missing you now and then”

He wobbled and looked over at Pete whose eyes snapped back to normal at the sad melody. This was what Patrick and Pete always sang to each other when the other down.  

“Making eyes at this husk around my heart

I see through you when we're sitting in the dark

So give me your filth

Make it rough

Let me, let me trash your love

I will sing to you every day

If it will take away the pain

Oh and I've heard you got it, got it so bad

'Cause HE IS the best you'll never have

Baby, you were my picket fence

I miss missing you now and then

Chlorine kissed summer skin

I miss missing you now and then

Sometimes before it gets better

The darkness gets bigger

The person that you'd take a bullet for is behind the trigger

Oh, we're fading fast

I miss missing you now and then“

Tears pricked at the corner of Patrick’s eyes as he finally started to collapse forward. He would’ve hit the ground if Pete hadn’t dashed forward to catch him. “Okay that’s it we’re done here. Stop trying to lure me away from him…he needs me and I need him. We’re soulmates you stupid cunt. You could’ve asked me out in school but you didn’t you were a bitch then and you’re a bigger bitch now. Having a pretty face and voice doesn’t mean you can lure anyone in. Patrick’s got a PRETTIER face and ANGELIC voice and he doesn’t need it to seduce me. He does that by being himself.”

From Pete’s arms Patrick groaned. “Shut up..I do not.”

With a fast shimmer they were back home and Pete carried Patrick up the stairs. “Pete..baby you don’t have to do this I can walk.”

“Nope absolutely not you exhausted yourself in that battle.”

“I absolutely did not.”

“You’re being stubborn and won’t admit it.”

Patrick pouted but didn’t protest when Pete laid him down in the bed especially when he laid next to him.

“Now lets go back to sleep especially since I know how much you hate being up early.”

A kiss to his nose and a low grumble that sounded like shut up as Patrick snuggled into his arms.

Patrick wasn’t sure how long he was asleep for when he heard it…the haunting siren call. Blue eyes glazed over as he untangled himself from Pete and slowly started to head towards the source of the noise.

Pete was a much lighter sleeper than his husband and felt him get up. He assumed maybe Patrick was going to the bathroom or maybe to check on Mycah. But either way he shouldn’t be walking alone..he was still weak from his battle with the siren. And that’s when Pete could just faintly hear it….that bitch was going after Patrick..

When Pete had found them Ashlee was singing by her lake and Patrick…Patrick was crucified against the tree..blue-silver blood dripping from his wrists and his head hanging down against his chest. “WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK DID YOU DO TO HIM?”

“Who says I did it darling? I’m just singing my song..for a lonely broken heart…yours.”

“My heart isn’t broken..its filled with rage that I’m going to kill yo—“ He was cut off  by Patrick’s shrill screech as she sliced her nails down his arm causing more of the blue-silver blood to flow.

“Come on Petey you’re a vampire aren’t you and this one..he’s the head white angel how  tempting that must be for you. I promise I’ll take care of you just come kill him like a good vampire.”

Vampires were naturally drawn to white angel blood it was like catnip to a cat to them. Patrick wasn’t just a white angel..he was the head white angel so his scent was one million times more alluring than any of his followers. Throw in that Patrick was well Pete’s other half and it was infinity more times alluring than any scent in the world. Pete’s eyes flashed red and his fangs extended. He ended up biting his own hand first. “I won’t hurt him… I hate drinking his blood. Leave him alone…I’ll go with you.”

“Pete…no..” Patrick’s eyes were becoming more focused and the cuts on him had vanished. Pete didn’t know his husband could heal without using his hands. He did however know how strong Patrick was so he wasn’t surprised to see him break free of his binds once his cuts were healed. “I can beat her I just need the energy…I need you.”

“You’ve tried Tricky and you failed. You gave in so NICELY when I was torturing you earlier.”

Patrick frowned as he saw what had transpired before Pete got there.

“You came I didn’t think I could lure a celestial being such as you..usually it’s creatures of the night. We’re going to have some fun before I kill you.” 

Next thing Patrick knew he was crucified against the tree tight wire digging into his wrist causing the blood to start dripping.  The pain was excruciating and it reminded Patrick of his past..his dark past that almost cost him Pete. 

“Thinking of him? Don’t worry he’ll come then he’ll be mine.”

“I don’t care what you do to me…leave him alone.”

“Whats on your mind Tricky? Mean little ole me could fuck your mind better than Gerard ever could..or what about your dear old parents?”

Instantly Patrick froze and went completely rigid. Memories of curling in the corner hiding while adults screamed saying magic was make believe and to grow up to be a real man not some fag waving a wand flashed into his head. Pale white hands covered his ears and he started to rock back and forth.

Pete was at a loss..he had never seen Patrick like this…what did this devil woman do to him? “WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM?”

“Nothing..yet he’s weak Petey how can you expect him to protect you?”

“I don’t need him to protect me! Leave him alone!” 

“Why? You’re going to kill him.” With a few words a wall of water rose up and lifted Patrick in the air before freezing so it imprisoned him. Ashlee hopped up to him cutting his shirt down with her nails and then dragging her nails over his right shoulder where the tattoo of Pete’s name was.  Blue eyes opened wide and he started to scream again thrashing against his icy binds as the ice dug into him and more blood started to pour out of previously healed wounds.

Pete followed her because he needed to wake Patrick up there was no way he could win this fight alone.“Patrick! Patrick wake up I’m here…I’m right here Trick… and I am so so so sorry.”

“He can’t hear you. As far as he knows he’s this scared little teenager again that was hopelessly in love with his best friend that was just out of his reach.  So since that’s true..I’ll make sure to erase his memory of you permanently.” She finally reached down to his left hand where streaks of blue-silver blood trailed and almost helped lubricate his ring finger allowing her to pull off the silver band.

When Pete saw her remove Patrick’s wedding band the bloodlust in his subsided but the anger rose to a fever pitch. He would never forget the day him and Patrick got married. Bathed in the warm glow of Patrick’s angel palace a place that Pete by all regards didn’t belong. But Patrick was firm and said for the light to exist it needed a little dark.  That was what was engraved on those wedding bands. Alongside the date and a brief signature.  He remembered dipping Patrick all the way down to kiss him in front of all their friends and how Patrick despite turning a beautiful shade of pink (it clashed with the all white that he was wearing) allowed it and even was the one to attempt to deepen it. The way they had waltzed around to their wedding song was magical. 

Pete was at a loss. He didn’t know how to save Patrick. If roles were reversed Patrick would’ve had him safely in his arms by now.Even when Pete was named head vampire Patrick didn’t bat an eyelash about going to the vampire kingdom with him for the coronation ceremony.Even though it put him in extreme danger given how attractive a white angel’s blood was to a vampire. But no Patrick this pure and beautiful selfless creature walked confidently hand in hand with Pete and smiled when Pete was told it was him, he was the new head vampire.  At that moment he finally felt worthy of Patrick. Even though he was older than Patrick he always felt like Patrick was out of reach, he was smart, he was strong and he could command the white angel army easier than he could fall asleep. Pete sought out Patrick’s advice about ruling a species and Patrick just shrugged and gave him that smile with those blue eyes. “Just be yourself.”

Ashlee had raised the prison even higher and sent a wall of water crashing into Pete knocking him back down to the ground.Fists clenched after looking down his left wrist where Patrick’s name was inked into his skin forever.  Using his super ability to jump fifty feet in the air he landed on the ice prison where Ashlee was still clawing her nails into Patrick who wasn’t screaming anymore and was just staring straight ahead like he was…oh god he couldn’t be.

“Get your fucking disgusting hands off him and I won’t punch you hard enough to make your ancestors feel it.”

“Awe but Petey….I’ll comfort you..sorry for the loss of your sweet sweet husband but face it. He was a little geek and you two just didn’t fit together. You’re better off without him—“ The punch when it came was hard and Pete felt like he was borderline going feral.  “Give me his wedding band RIGHT NOW OR I’LL TEAR YOU APART PIECE BY PIECE.”

The next bunch of events happened so fast it was a blur. The two of them were wrestling and Pete had to admit she was strong considering his super human strength. Dear gods Patrick couldn’t really be dead could he?

Her sharp claws dug down his arms and he screamed at the pain and slashed at her with his own claws.

“Ice carcerem!” Now Ashlee was imprisoned in an ice prison just like she had done to Patrick and Pete was grateful he remembered a few spells from his school days.

“Now I am going to tear you apart limb by limb. You’ll pay for what you did to him. I don’t know how to destroy a siren but I’ll figure it out!”

“You? You were too busy banging Gabe to pay attention how did you ever pass scho—“

Pete wondered what made her stop talking even as he pressed his hand to skin trying to stop the bleeding. If he had fed he’d be self healing but he hadn’t eaten in awhile.

“Oh, the things that you do in the name of what you love

You were doomed but just enough

You were doomed but just enough

If you were church, whoo

I'd get on my knees, yeah

Confess my love, I'd know where to be

My sanctuary, you're holy to me

If you were church, yeah, I'd get on my knees

I love the world but I just don't love the way it makes me feel

Got a few more fake friends

And it's getting hard to know what's real

And if death is the last appointment

Then we're all just sitting in the waiting room

I am just a human trying to avoid my certain doom”’

Pete heard the haunting melody and it was a call like another siren…dear gods Ashlee was bad enough.

“I didn’t know there was another siren nearby…but still they can’t have you. I claimed you first Petey..” She started to wail as the mystery siren’s song changed to something darker…

“All the writers keep writing what they write

Somewhere another pretty vein just dies

I've got the scars from tomorrow and I wish you could see

That you're the antidote to everything except for me

A constellation of tears on your lashes

Burn everything you love

Then burn the ashes

In the end everything collides

My childhood spat back the monster that you see

My songs know what you did in the dark

So light em up…ignis anguis!”

That last bit was not a song..it was a spell..a spell Pete remembered being cast the year they all got snowed in at the magic school.  The fire snake wrapped slowly around Ashlee’s ankles.  Her ice prison was melting and the collision of heat and steam made it hard to see. 

Pete sighed softly and just started to sing softly trying to comfort himself for dealing with the after math of this battle.

“The tombstones are waiting

They were half engraved

They knew it was over”

Pete didn’t know how he was supposed to deal with losing Patrick again…

“Just didn't know the date”

He jumped about ten feet in the air when he heard someone singing with him.Was it the siren that had helped him? Were there good sirens? Maybe this one didn’t attract married men…so maybe Pete was safe, for the moment.

“And I cast a spell over the West

To make you think of me

The same way I think of you

This is a love song in my own way

Happily ever after below the waist”

And now the siren’s voice sounded familiar and Pete slapped himself. It wasn’t a siren’s voice it was an angel’s voice…his angel’s voice and he barely had time to process that when he felt lips on his. 

“How did you get out of that mess? I thought you were dead!” Not caring about covering each other in their own blood the pair found themselves in a vice grip hug. “We’re connected love as long as you live I’ll find a way back to you. Plus well I can heal myself you know. Now then.”

Pete watched as Patrick stood up and faced Ashlee. Despite being tortured he stood strong. “I believe you have my wedding band give it back and maybe I’ll remove the flames. Tell me Ashlee am I more than you bargained for yet?”

“Hey Trick? I’m glad you’re okay but I can’t get my arm to stop bleeding think you could?”

“Oh God…I’m sorry Pete..but I’m not going to heal you. You’re going to heal yourself.”

“You know I can’t…OH!”

Brown met blue (although Patrick’s eyes were more green from using his angelic siren powers) and Pete saw Patrick’s plush pink lips curve into a smirk. He walked behind his husband and held him by his waist nuzzling into his neck. “I still feel bad…”

“Sush and just bite me.”

“Trick baby..don’t you think you’ve lost enough blood..”

“I swear to fuck Peter if you don’t bite me…trust me…I know my body…and I need you.”

If there was one thing Pete couldn’t refuse it was when Patrick’s voice went low and raspy. It was like his voice dripped of sex,which right now Pete reminded himself it probably was.

~#~

Having retrieved his wedding band back from Ashlee Patrick smirked looking at Pete. “Well put it on and kiss me.”

“Babe you really want me to kiss you? My mouth is tainted with your blood and my own.” The ring was slid onto Patrick’s ring finger and he sighed softly however…

“I don’t care kiss me now so help me—mmmph!”

His hands tangled in Pete’s hair and their hips crashed against each other’s before Patrick broke the kiss leaving Pete confused. “Wait here..I’m gonna make sure she can’t bother us anymore.”

Patrick couldn’t jump as high as Pete could but he could fly and was up at the top of Ashlee’s slowly melting ice prison the clashing of his and Pete’s fire and ice spells. “Well well well what have we here?”

Ashlee looked at him and gasped. “You…you look different…you’re not fat like you were in school and you’re glowing.”

“I know and I haven’t been for awhile. You were just too blind to see.  I’m going to sing you one more song and then we’re done.”

“So wear me like a locket around your throat I’ll weigh you down,I’ll watch you choke you look so good in blue.” Closing his eyes and repeating in his head that this was for him and Pete he locked his lips on hers letting the combination of the mixture of his and Pete’s blood flow into the open cut on her lips. He pulled back smirking the spell was complete.

The fire started to rise and she started to screech. “What did you do to me?”

“Killed you with the power of love sweetheart now if you don’t mind I’m washing my mouth with soap and going home to bang my husband until the sun rises. Toodles!”

"See Ashlee i would say thanks for the memories even though they weren't that great but Pete tastes like you only sweeter...much much sweeter."

Once he was back on the ground with Pete no words were exchanged just  strong embrace. After a moment Patrick spoke up in his low, husky voice. “Can I take you home Pete?”

“Do you have to ask Trick?”

With a flash of blue they disappeared just as Ashlee turned to dust.

Pete was laying in his and Patrick’s bed naked minus his boxers and glanced at the bathroom door where he could see his husband also naked minus his boxers and undershirt. “Trick…you’re going to scrub your teeth away you’ve brushed them about twenty times. Not to mention how many times you washed your face..”

“I DON’T CARE THAT WAS VILE!”

#fob #falloutboy #fall out boy fanfiction #peterick #peterick fanfiction