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#The Spirit is Smoke feeling forgotten.
jaydraw209 · 3 months
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sleep-deprivedracoon · 7 months
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Pairing: Gojo Satoru x f! reader
word count: 3680 Summary: Satoru doing his best to get you out of your downward spiral. He failed Suguru but he won't fail you. Author's note: based on this prompt. I think I speak for most of the fandom when I say we all need some extra fluff and love from Gojo after the week we've had with the anime and manga. So this one is for all of us Gojo wives. Ngl, I am literally shaking right now as I dare to post this. I don't know if y'all will like this or if this just flops. CW: depression, food habits, angst, implied relationships, patterns of isolation, fluff, angst to comfort, helplessness, mentions of smoking
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Satoru Gojo stood before your door, an unusual sense of foreboding gnawing at the edges of his normally self-assured demeanor. It was a feeling he wasn't accustomed to, one that clashed against the confident façade he typically wore like armor. He couldn't shake the nagging sensation that something was terribly wrong with you, something that went far beyond the physical injuries. It had been weeks since you returned from that mission, and something had changed in you—It was as if something was tearing you apart from the inside.
He'd delved into the mission reports, scouring through the details, looking for any signs of what might have transpired. The mission had been a success, technically flawless, with only a handful of unfortunate bystanders caught in the crossfire. You'd managed to take down a first-grade curse with no fatalities—by all accounts, it should have been considered a triumph. So why had it left you so shattered?
As the door creaked open, revealing you on the other side, his sharp eyes caught the flicker of a smile that didn't quite reach your eyes.
Your smile, once a beacon of light that never failed to brighten his day, now seemed a mere shadow of its former self. It was as though the spark within you had dimmed, leaving behind an empty echo of what used to be.
"Toru," you greeted, your voice a little too forced, a little too brittle.
Gojo pulled you into a tight embrace, his arms wrapping around you with a desperation he couldn't quite put into words. He pressed his lips to the top of your head, a gesture that had become second nature to him, a silent declaration of affection. “Hi, sweets.” he murmured, his voice tinged with concern.
As he held you, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was teetering on the edge of a precipice, that the ground beneath him was unstable. He hoped beyond hope that he was merely overthinking, that you were stronger than he feared. But deep down, he knew. He knew something was fundamentally wrong.
You gently pulled away, and he followed you into your apartment, his senses immediately assaulted by the disarray that greeted him. Sure, you were a chaotic person, but there was usually an organized chaos to your living space. Books strewn haphazardly on shelves, art supplies scattered on tables, and the comforting scent of incense in the air—all elements of your usual environment. The chaos was familiar, a reflection of your vibrant, unpredictable personality. But this... this was different. There was an air of neglect, a sense that even your usual disorder had lost its usual rhythm. He took in the scene—the scattered papers, the toppled books, the forgotten articles of clothing strewn across the floor. Each item seemed to whisper a tale of neglect; a story of a mind too preoccupied to care for its surroundings. He saw the remnants of a once vibrant spirit, now muted and worn.
He followed you into the kitchen, concern etched into his features. "Have you eaten yet?" he asked, his voice laced with genuine worry.
You mumbled a half-hearted "yes," but he wasn't fooled. He opened your fridge to place a few drinks, and his heart sank at the sight. It hadn't been stocked in a while; the shelves almost barren. It was a stark contrast to the usual assortment of ingredients and snacks he was accustomed to stealing. He glanced at you, silently noting the tired lines etching your face, the weariness in your eyes that belied your attempt at a smile
You stood beside him, trying to deflect his concern with a forced smile and a weak excuse. "I've been lazy, just ordering takeout."
He glanced at the trash can, noting its emptiness. He saw right through the lie, but he didn't push it. Instead, he turned his gaze back to you, taking in the disheveled state of your hair, the dullness in your eyes, the weight loss that had left you looking frail. It was a familiar dance—one he had witnessed before, with someone else he had cared for deeply. That smile you offered him, that empty, hollow smile with closed eyes, it hit him like a tidal wave of dread. It reminded Gojo of Suguru after Amanai's death—their once lively friend reduced to a mere shell, hiding behind a facade. The parallels between you and Suguru's descent sent a shiver down his spine.
The weight of helplessness settled like a leaden anchor in Satoru Gojo's chest. He cursed inwardly, the bitter taste of regret mingling with the dread that had consumed him. How was it happening again? Why was it always the ones he cared for the most? The memory of Suguru, his once-vibrant friend reduced to a mere shadow of himself, haunted him. He had failed Suguru, and that failure still weighed heavily on him.
The mantra of his own strength echoed in his mind, a bitter irony. He was the strongest, but in this moment, he felt powerless. Weak. Useless. Helpless. As you stood before him, offering a smile that barely masked the turmoil within, you felt so distant, so far away. It was as though an impenetrable barrier had risen between the two of you.
It had started weeks ago, with your return from that fateful mission. Even then, something had felt off. You had been fatigued, weary, and Gojo had been there for you, trying to help you unwind and recharge. But you barely spoke of the mission, your words guarded, your gaze distant. In the ensuing weeks, he had watched as you withdrew, not just from him, but from their students. He noticed how you declined Nobara’s invites to go shopping, how the playful banter with Megumi had all but disappeared. Even your calls with Yuta who was overseas had become brief, the once-lively conversations now reduced to strained exchanges.
He caught a whiff of smoke around you one evening, a scent that hung in the air like a lingering secret. He knew then, without needing to ask, that you had turned to cigarettes for solace. There were signs, always signs. The subtle shifts in behavior, the hollow looks, the moments of silence that stretched on longer than they should. But he had chosen to give you space, believing that time would allow you to heal and find your way back. It was a mistake, one he deeply regretted now as he saw the signs he had missed piling up.
Gojo's gaze settled on you once more, his heart heavy with concern. You had lost weight, your eyes dulled, your once-lustrous hair now a tangled mess. It was as though a part of you had withered away, leaving behind a hollow shell. The pain in his chest intensified as he realized that he couldn't afford to stand by and watch you slip away. He had to act, to break through the barrier you had unknowingly erected around yourself. But how? That was the question that haunted him as he searched your eyes for a way to reach you, to pull you back from the abyss you seemed to be falling into.
He turned to you, his eyes tracing the weariness etched into your features, the fragility in your frame. "Sweets," he murmured, his voice laced with a mix of concern and determination. "We can't keep going on like this. You don't have to face this alone.”
As Gojo's concerned gaze bore into you, he couldn't help but notice the immediate defensiveness in your body language. Your chuckle, dry and forced, cut through the air like a fragile attempt to push his worries away. "I'm okay, Toru," you insisted, your voice wavering just slightly.
"(Y/n) …" he urged; his voice gentle but firm. "You don't have to pretend with me. I can see that something's eating at you. You can rely on me, you know that, right? I'm here to shoulder whatever burdens you're carrying."
You met his gaze, eyes guarded, and shook your head, a hint of stubbornness in your expression. "Toru, really, I appreciate it, but I'm okay. You're worrying unnecessarily.”
You remained closed off, a wall of resistance that he couldn't breach. Your insistence that everything was fine felt like a dagger to his heart, but he understood that pushing you further at this moment could risk you shutting him out completely and he couldn't bear the thought of losing you to the darkness.
So, he accepted your words, even as they left a bitter taste in his mouth. "Alright, sweets. Just remember, I'm here whenever you're ready to talk."
Ordering takeout seemed like the most rational thing to do, a glimmer of normalcy in the midst of the storm. He chose a spicy Chow Mein with Gyoza on the side, knowing it was a combination that never failed to put a smile on your face. As the two of you sat in silence, he couldn't help but notice how you toyed with your food, pushing it around on the plate rather than really eating.
He teased gently, "You know, you're starting to remind me of a kid being forced to eat their vegetables. Come on, at least take a few bites for me."
You glanced up, a faint glimmer of amusement in your eyes, and complied, taking a few bites to prove a point. It was a small victory, but a victory nonetheless. It was through these small steps, he realized, that he needed to slowly guide you back from the darkness that threatened to consume you.
After dinner, he bid you farewell, his footsteps heavy as he walked away from your apartment. Once out of your sight, he clutched his hair in frustration, a tumultuous storm of conflicting emotions swirling within him. He couldn't bear to see you like this, not again. He couldn't let another person he cared for slip into the abyss.
With a determined exhale, he removed his shades and reached for the black blindfold that he rarely wore when it was just the two of you. He tied it securely and looked back at the window to your apartment. In that moment, he vowed to himself that he wouldn't let you slip away. He would fight for you, even if it meant stepping into the darkness alongside you.
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In the days that followed, Gojo remained steadfast in his determination to pull you out of the suffocating depths of depression that had ensnared you. He knew he couldn't do it alone, and admitting that fact was a monumental step for someone as self-reliant as him. It surprised even Shoko, who had known Gojo for years, to witness his newfound vulnerability.
He started with small, manageable gestures, well aware that overwhelming you would only push you further away. Slowly, he began to tidy up your apartment, one step at a time. He organized the scattered papers, straightened the toppled books, and restored a sense of order to the chaos that had overtaken the space. He did it in small iterations, so as to not catch you off guard.  He knew that even the semblance of cleanliness and organization could bring a sense of calm. Another day, he arrived with a bag of groceries, quietly slipping into your kitchen to prepare a meal. At times, he found himself sneaking food into you, taking advantage of moments when your mind wandered elsewhere. He'd feed you, offering fruits and treats while you mindlessly chewed on it, lost in thought. It was a silent promise that he was there to support you, to ensure you took care of yourself.
Then came the day he dragged you out, insisting that you join him and his students for a shopping excursion. It was an attempt to remind you that there was still joy and fun to be had, even in the midst of the world's worries. He made sure to bring his students along, Yuji and Nobara, who shared a single brain cell with their hairbrained schemes, and Megumi, who often found himself the target of their antics. As you wandered through the bustling market, you couldn't help but be drawn into the silliness that surrounded you. Yuji and Nobara's playful banter, Megumi's exasperation, and the way his students relied on you for the silliest of things slowly began to chip away at the darkness within you. There were moments when you couldn't help but smile, caught up in the absurdity of it all. Watching Yuji and Nobara embark on their ridiculous plans, seeing Megumi squirm in embarrassment, witnessing the camaraderie among his students—it all served as a poignant reminder that life held moments of levity, even in its darkest corners. Gojo reveled in these small victories, each one a testament to your gradual recovery. His approach was slow and deliberate, mixing moments of genuine concern with his signature goofiness.
"Hey, sweets," Gojo said, nudging you playfully as Yuji and Nobara attempted to outdo each other with their ridiculous purchases. "You see what I have to deal with every day? They're a handful. Why do I always end up taking care of brats?” He sighed in exaggeration.
The sound of your giggle was a melody that resonated in the depths of Satoru Gojo's being. He couldn't help but be drawn to the warmth in your laughter, a glimmer of the vibrant spirit that still lived within you. Your fingers brushed against his cheek, a gentle caress that sent a jolt of electricity through him. He leaned into the touch, his heart leaping at the connection.
"You know," you teased, patting his cheek affectionately, "you adopted these brats yourself. You're such a mother hen, Toru."
His lips curled into a playful smirk. "Well, what can I say? I've always had a soft spot for the misfits." He took your hand, pressing a soft kiss to your palm. "And I'm glad that this mother hen has you as my favorite rooster to come back to whenever I need a break from these rascals."
Your laughter, though still fragile, filled the room, a welcome sound that eased the weight in his heart. He was getting closer, step by step, to uncovering the vibrant spirit that resided within you.
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Several days later, the Tokyo Jujutsu High planned a retreat to an Onsen resort in Gunma. The students shared rooms, and Gojo, in his usual annoying fashion, had managed to finagle Yaga into assigning you to share a room with him. After all, you were both teachers and adults—it shouldn't have been a problem.
Gojo sat on the tatami floor of your room, dressed in a yukata, having just returned from the baths. He sipped on cold coffee milk, enjoying the tranquil atmosphere of the traditional inn. When he heard the sliding door open, he looked up, and his heart skipped a beat. You looked ethereal in the Yukata, the fabric draping gracefully over your form. Your hair was still damp from the baths, strands clinging to your skin in a way that made his heart race. There was a newfound fullness to your cheeks, a healthy flush to your complexion that spoke of progress.
In that moment, he realized just how far you had come. The bags under your eyes were still there, but the overall transformation was striking. He clicked his tongue several times, pulling you gently to the tatami floor in front of him. He reached for the towel that hung around your shoulders and scolded you gently, "Sweets, you need to dry your hair properly. You'll catch a cold like this."
His fingers moved through your hair with a soothing touch, the room enveloped in silence save for the rustle of fabric and the soft hum of the night outside. He was meticulous, his actions deliberate as he dried your hair strand by strand. As he continued to pat your hair dry with gentle strokes, he noticed that you were trembling. Frowning, he stopped, his concern growing. And then he heard it—the soft, muffled sniffle that escaped your lips. In an instant, he turned you around to face him, his eyes widening as he saw the tears welling up in your eyes.
Before he could say a word, you began sobbing, your shoulders shaking with the force of your emotions. You buried your face in his chest, and he wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as you cried. He didn't brush away your tears or offer empty reassurances. Instead, he let you cry, allowing the dam you had built around your emotions to finally break. He could feel the warmth of your tears soaking through his yukata, the shudders that racked your body, and the tremble of your hands as they clung to his robes. It was a raw, vulnerable moment, and he was there to bear witness to it, to share in your pain and offer his silent support. Gojo's touch was gentle, his hand stroking your back in a steady, rhythmic motion. He didn't speak, understanding that this moment was about you and your release. His heart ached with each anguished sob that wracked your body, but he remained a steadfast anchor, giving you the space you needed to let it all out.
As your sobs began to subside, your words spilled out in a torrent of emotion. You spoke of the mission, of how it had torn open old wounds, making you confront shadows from your past. The cursed technique of the first-grade curse had exploited your own memories, forcing you to relive the pain and uncertainty.
Gojo had been privy to your painful past, as you had confided in him long ago. He understood the emotional scars that had marked your journey, and now, he could see why you were descending into darkness.
Your voice trembled as you confessed your fear. You longed to return to the person you used to be, but you were terrified that you had lost yourself in the process. The fear that in losing yourself, you might also lose him gripped at your heart.
Gently, Gojo cupped your cheek, his sky-blue eyes locking onto yours. He removed his shades, allowing you to see the sincerity in his gaze. "No matter what version of yourself you present to me," he said, his voice soft but resolute, "I will love you. Whether you're happy, sad, angry, or anything in between, it doesn't change a thing. If you somehow turned evil, I'd love you. If you don’t want to be a sorcerer anymore, I’d love you. Even if you transformed into a worm, I'd love you. I will love every version of you that has been and that is yet to come, (Y/n). " He couldn't help but inject a touch of his signature playfulness into the moment. "Well, unless you turn into Gakuganji," he added with a mock shudder, "then you might be pushing it. But hey, I'll even love you if you morph into that old fart. Just… just don't test me on that one." He kisses your trembling lips gently. “I don’t think my heart could handle that.”
A small giggle burst from your lips, and you playfully swatted his arm, the sound like a gentle chime amidst your tears. It was a moment of relief, a brief respite from the weight of your emotions. Gojo couldn't help but chuckle in response, his grin boyish and goofy. “I will always love you (Y/n). Even if you lose yourself, I will walk with you to help you rediscover yourself. I am great at helping people find things. These six eyes are here for a reason, you know?”
You gently shook your head, a small smile playing on your lips as you leaned in to kiss Satoru Gojo on his lips, your gratitude and affection evident in the tender gesture. "Thank you," you whispered against his lips, "for being you."
His lips curved into a soft smile as he returned your kiss, savoring the warmth of your affection. "It's been my pleasure, (Y/n)," he replied, his voice filled with sincerity. “After all, nobody is best at being Gojo Satoru other than Satoru Gojo himself.” He winks.
You continued, your voice barely above a whisper, "I know what you've been doing, Toru. All these days, you’ve been taking care of me, helping me even if I didn't want to admit it to myself. But I needed it, and I needed you."
Gojo's eyes softened as he gazed at you, his thumb brushing against your cheek. "If the roles were reversed, you would've done a far better and more efficient job," he admitted, a hint of shame coloring his voice. "I should've seen it sooner, (Y/n)."
You silenced him with a gentle finger against his lips, his mock pout making you smile. "Don't blame yourself, Toru," you murmured. "I didn't want you to find out, and it's not your fault. I feel lighter now than I have in days, although I am still struggling to cope.”
In response, Gojo spoke with unwavering determination, "I'll be here beside you, sweets. However you want and in whatever form you need.
“Whatever I need huh?” A wistful smile tugged at your lips. "Maybe turning myself into Gakuganji would help," you mused, a playful glint in your eyes. “won’t it, Toru?”
Gojo groaned dramatically, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. His fingers danced along your sides and ribs, eliciting giggles and laughter from you as you squirmed beneath his touch. It was a moment of pure, unadulterated joy. His fingers attacked your sides and belly, evoking peals of laughter from you. The tatami floor beneath you seemed to come alive with the sounds of your giggles and Gojo's playful laughter. As he tickled you mercilessly, Gojo's thoughts were clear—he would do anything to keep that light in your eyes, to see you smile, even if it meant turning into Gakuganji himself. Anything at all. And with every joyful laugh that filled the room, he knew he was one step closer to bringing you back to him.
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Taglist - @hiraethsdesires Note to @hiraethsdesires: thank you, Hira. I thought I'd never be able to get back into writing again. I thought I had lost it. But it felt so nice to dive right into this again. The first character I had ever written for in this blog was Gojo. It feels just right to get back into it with him again.
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onlyseokmins · 20 days
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$$60 billion (part 1) • l.s.m.
How did a legendary bounty promised for turning in the wasteland's most infamous outlaw transform into a sick, little inside betting joke amongst your traveling companions? Though you have no idea why they're doing it… you sure as hell don't want that very same gunslinger comrade worth sixty billion double dollars to know anything about it either — but oops — looks like he already does! Damn you and your temper, some unhelpful lip-loosening alcohol, and one no-good, sorry excuse of a preacher you sometimes think of as a friend.
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Pairing: outlaw!lee seokmin x fem!reader Genres: eventual smut (minors dni!), trigun!au action!au, apocalyptic/post-apocalyptic!au, space western!au, slight enemies to comrades to ??? !au, angst, fluff, they're dumbasses your honor 🙏 Warnings: swearing, blood, death, gore, guns, injuries, destruction, mentions of knives, weapons, violence, creepy monsters and creatures, ptsd, moral ambiguities, dark topics tbh, smoking, unsettling space western things, slight body horror and hints at altered dna, weird religious cults, mentions of eating/food, alcohol, threats, bets among friends, platonic (but not really) nakedness, reader is operating on a short fuse bc I believe u have to be built different for this universe, their communication is abt to be as poor as the plant life 💀 Seungcheol kinda his own warning imho, biggest apology to chan, and we all love seok sm bc he sings abt total slaughter 🙇🏻‍♀️ WC: 19.5k of 32.7k | Part 2 | Read on AO3 A/N: this is for the Now that's 90's - A Seventeen collab and loosely based off/inspired by the Trigun anime/manga! You do not need to know it as I manipulated a whole lot of elements for my own narrative but beware of various spoilers if you do go ahead and check out the series after reading!! I feel like the boys may seem ooc but I had a lot of fun putting this together 😌 Thank you Summer and Isa for hosting this collab and your utmost patience in me finally writing my piece! I hope everyone enjoys this and please check out the other writers in this amazing collab ❤️let me know your thoughts and feel free to ask any questions regarding this au's intricacies!!
Everyone wanted Lee Seokmin. 
The cities' great militaries. Bounty hunters. Bandits on the roads. Criminals escaping death row. Prowling pirate gangs. His twin brother. You. 
Though you reckoned your "want" for him was a bit… different from others. Well, at least you hope so, goddamn it. 
You shiver. 
At first, you wanted him just like the mass majority would one day as well — dead. The deed swiftly carried out with a silver pistol aimed at his temple.
Besides, your blood-thirst began before the destruction of July. Unlike most, who angrily shake their fists at the gaping crater on the fifth moon in the spirit of pure vengeance. Yes, the tragic incident of the great city that upped the bounty dangling over his head like a noose to a sixty billion double dollars reward. But Little Ivywood was the first of many places that would end up reduced to ruins after Lee Seokmin set foot there.
Wiped off the map. Wiped from history. Wiped from existence. But never forgotten. Especially not by the small town's only known survivor — you.
Your earliest memories contain little about the events that led up to being left on the doorstep of Little Ivywood's unofficial orphanage. How could they when you were just a baby? One swaddled in a ratty cloth weighted down by a rusted pistol. There was just one simple hint to your past — scribbled nearly illegible on a torn piece of paper dotted with blood — and could only be what the nuns had to assume was your name.
At least that's how Sister Meryl relayed the tale whenever asked, her hands clasped tightly together in praise and gratitude to the Saint that delivered you to them unharmed. The irony, considering Sister Lucia always looks like she'll faint just like the day she opened the convent's side door. It wasn't an easy sight to see or recall, the image of a wailing infant mouthing on the empty muzzle of a gun.
Neither versions of your origin story could be that far off thanks to the scar marring your left hand and the gun held tightly in your right. You've had both for as long as you can remember. And as you grew and changed, so did they.
The scar shrunk and faded through the years, seemingly forgotten amongst a myriad of other markings littered across your skin. Over time, the pistol's rusted parts were repaired or replaced and soon, its shine and character returned. Restored to its former glory while forging a new beginning ahead with a different owner.
But there were two things that stayed constant throughout your years at the orphanage. The first was your birth name. Not even the nuns, who generally loved bestowing scriptural monikers as if they were granting rich titles to unnamed orphans, tried to change yours. The second was a person who you still refuse to call by his baptismal name — Chan.
He helped you, became an assistant of sorts. Originally just some snot-nosed, beanpole of a fellow orphan you didn't really pay much attention to. A scared kid who cried way too loudly even after you'd even taken the time to demonstrate that the gun was safe after he'd been the one continuously pestering to see it. Very much to Sister Constance's chagrin, since it all went down in the middle of confessional time.
But curiosity eventually overturned the initial fear.
Lucky, because by acquiring bravery, Chan could discover his innate talent for gunsmithing. Lanky, noodle arms transformed into well-formed, sinewy muscles. The soft baby skin of his hands roughened with callouses as he whittled away near the convent's underground furnace. He'd spend hours down there, returning with sweat, grime, and charcoal smudged all over his skin after melting together the random metal objects found by digging beneath the basement's unfinished floor.
The Sisters disliked dirt and grime all over the children and tracked through the doors. But it was hard to keep clean out in the middle of a sandy desert. Complaints dwindled thanks to the fellow orphans who would stop their mischief to watch Chan work. And as time passed, his shoulders broadened further, his voice began to deepen, his dark hair grew longer, and those brown eyes started to sparkle with something different from simple, fleeting passion — it was a dream.
The excitable boy would tell you all about it under the stars. Late into the nights when you searched for what had to be remnants of Earthen materials from the Big Fall, he'd chatter on and on.
"Once we're actual adults," — free from the guardianship requirement provided from the orphanage — "we're gonna leave Lil Ivywood behind and explore the great wastelands of Gunsmoke!"
You snort at the ridiculousness of such an idea. "And how do you think we'll survive?"
"Easy-peasy, I'm gonna build a bunch of guns and we're gonna end up so rich. And famous!"
"Yeah, sure. Throw a couple double dollars at the worms, I'm sure they'll let us pass with no problem."
Not one to be deterred by your eternal sarcasm, Chan shakes his head."Nah, that's where you come in. Didn't think I'd let you freeload, right?"
He stands and stretches both of his arms straight out, the ones your roommate had started to gush over. Hands clasped together like Sister Meryl's always do before prayer time and then extending both pointer fingers into a mock handgun, out into the distant sand dunes one rarely dares to stray.
"You gotta be a sharpshooter to not let my hard work go to waste!"
You lazily take aim next to him, handling the freshly restored pistol with uncharacteristic gentleness. While it might officially be yours, it's also Chan's baby.
"Mm-hm, me and my killer skills."
And then you both dissolve into laughter.
It was such a pipe dream and yet; it didn't seem utterly impossible. There were little moments you let yourself imagine it, too — just until the suns peep their heads above the horizon. There was no way you could defend yourself — let alone another person — from the dangers of the desert or it would've been something you'd attempted years ago.
But when Chan spoke of his plans under the glow of the orbiting full moons, confidently mapping an adventure through an area he's never been to or seen before, and dreamed — he easily pulled you under his spell too. It was contagious, exciting, addicting, and most of all — it could really be… possible.
An armory of grade-A weapons. The bank account overflowing with double dollars. Endless boxes of bullets and the refined skills to shoot them; you were the force to be reckoned with and a protector of those who couldn't do it for themselves.
"Do you think… we could really succeed?" you ask one night, running a finger along the familiar engravings on your gun's grip panel.
Chan's grin was as shiny as the circular metal shell he was carving into. You refuse to look his way because of how infectious it could be. Plus, the main reason it was so stinking bright was due to this being the first time you verbally entertained his ideas.
"Oh-ho-ho, doubt my capabilities?"
"Obviously."
If offended — he was not — by the instant agreement, there was no sign of it. Instead, he focused back onto his handicraft, knowing you would eventually spill your true thoughts if he was patient.
There was no rush tonight after all. A star-filled expanse of black blanketed across the sky — one he hoped would never change to blue.
"More like… it's just going to be so risky!"
"And that's why you'll be the —"
"But I've never even held a gun before!" You spot Chan pointedly direct the corner of his gaze to where your hands rest, causing you to flinch them away from the weapon and wave around haphazardly as your cheeks heat. "I mean, like, to shoot! Sister Lucia always says it'd be too dangerous."
"Sister Lucia thinks water that doesn't flow directly out of the holy grail is dangerous."
"Technically, that's true."
"Oh god, she's got you thinkin' the same, too!"
"But she'd probably rather swear by the Saint than ever let me get any bullets…" The thought alone of the devout nun saying the Savior's name in vain makes both of you smirk but yours falls just as quick as it came. "And we're going to need those if we ever want to leave Little Ivywood."
"Well —"
"And I… I'd have to kill things! People, too. I don't know if I can do that, I —"
" — Think fast!"
It's his turn to interrupt, chipper voice ever optimistic as he tosses the finished trinket your way. Thankfully, your reflexes work fast enough to catch it nimbly in time. The oval is hot to the touch after hovering over searing flames and despite its small size, weighs down your right palm as you glance over its etchings.
Satisfied, Chan takes that as his cue to walk toward the nook that shields you from the roaring heat of the furnace. Squatting down so he's eye-level with your knees, he brushes back his tangled mess of hair with one hand and taps knowingly at the barrel of the pistol with the other.
"There's no reason to kill anyone or anything."
"But this can hurt people… I could hurt people."
"You've had this ever since you were a baby and never harmed anyone with it."
"It's… it's never been loaded or…"
"Doesn't need to be. If you smacked someone with it, they'd surely feel that hit." He snickers, tone bordering on the edge of cockiness. "I would know, considering the sturdy and valuable materials used for repairs."
You roll your eyes and mutter, "Show-off," but it lacks true malice behind it.
"And even so," Chan takes one of his hands and pats the back of your free one, unintentionally right over the spot where your scar lies. "You've hurt no one before. Not even me, who annoys you the most!"
"About time you finally realized how merciful I am."
He says your name in earnest, remaining uncharacteristically serious and lays your intertwined hands on top of the gun before squeezing tightly. "Both this and you don't have to kill a single thing or person — ever — if that's not what you want to do. You can aim for non-vital points, shoot up in the air… Bullets or no bullets, just the sight of a weapon alone can be enough of a deterrent for most."
Chewing hesitantly on your lower lip, you let his words sink in and he continues.
"The fact you're aware of the hundreds of risks when handling a weapon like this means you'll be even more cautious when using it. I trust you, so trust in yourself."
Warmth spreads from your interlocked hands and through your entire body like you're wrapped in another one of his sweet hugs, culminating into tears threatening to spill past your lash line. Chan believed in you and though you'd never admit it aloud, it meant the world to you.
"When did you grow up so much?" you tease, letting out an exhale you didn't realize was being held.
"Aw, c'mon! I've been taller than you for months now!"
"Keep dreamin' if it makes you feel better."
Though Chan sasses back by sticking his tongue out, he lets you ruffle his sweaty bangs despite receiving a slightly bruised forehead in return because you forget about the new gift in your hand. Plotting an escape, he stands and pulls you up with him, joined by your clasped hands.
"We should probably head back. Sister Constance's likely gonna ask us to check the Plant before morning mass and you don't want her to catch you dozing off again."
"Last I recall, you were the one she caught napping!"
"But you have the most demerits this week."
"And whose fault is that?!"
Quick as lightning, he nudges you with enough strength to catch you off guard and destabilize your balance. Then he tears away, calling over his shoulder, "Snooze and ya lose!"
"Ugh, this is exactly why — you never play fair!"
Regathering your bearings at record speed, you dash right after Chan. The boy's raucous laughter echoes in your own lungs and you swear the stars twinkle brighter in the nighttime sky. You overtake him right before reaching the convent's door — the same one you were left on — and clutch at his arm before he can reach past to open it.
"Hey… thanks."
He grins all goofy. Chan's well aware you mean much more than that, but he opts to flick your forehead rather than give you grief over it. "Yeah, yeah. I do so much for you, you know?"
"Mm-hm."
"So it's about time to finally pick a name I can carve onto that bad boy. If you don't, I'll put mine there." He nods to your gun excitedly, then points to the oval. "Oh, and I'll make a chain for that soon. Did you decide what you'll put inside?"
"Questions, questions, demands, demands." You wave him off and open the door with a yawn. "I'll think of one. And yeah, you know that Earthen gadget we found? Gonna cut out those papers and put them in there before sleeping."
Once while digging for materials, you had stumbled across a square object that wasn't completely destroyed, unlike many others. After a few experiments of messing with the random knobs and buttons, you determined it could mimic whatever was directly in front of the clear coated lenses. And later — much to your amusement and amazement — it printed out the image on thick, shiny squares.
Fascinating little things those Earthlings created!
You'd luckily put the last few sheets left in the machine to good use. Experimenting with the surrounding scenery that blurrily featured some of Ivywood's buildings, then one of Chan, and finally wrangled a frame that captured both of you together.
"Do you think you'll be able to stabilize it?"
Your tentative question makes him look toward the large, bulbous structure that houses the Plant. The power source Little Ivywood depended upon.
He sports a cheery grin. "Won't know 'til I've tried!"
"Ever considered too much confidence might be a bad thing?"
"If you're jealous, just say so. But with you by my side, there's nothing we can't accomplish together!" He bounces excitedly on his heels. "Besides, I forgot to mention…" Beckoning you with a hand to come closer, you lean in, curious. "I've become quite the master at bargaining. There won't be a single worm who'll refuse a double dollar from the great Chan!"
"What did you do?"
"What haven't I done?"
"You're the worst. Like to ever exist."
"The absolute best, you mean 'cause there'll be no reason for you to waste any bullets or fear cutting a single lifespan short!"
"Goodnight, Chan."
"You mean 'thank you so much, what would I ever do without you, Chan!' but whatever! You can make it up to me tomorrow!"
But tomorrow never came.
Or rather — daybreak arrived in the unrecognizable form of rapid gunfire and screams of terror. The buildings rattled, trembled, and shook from the onslaught just like the people cowering in fear within them.
The dust stirred up in the chapel's hall after a wall unexpectedly collapsed causes you to cough. Amidst the chaos and panic, you spare a glance over your shoulder to see Sister Meryl, who strides confidently to the altar.
She stands with poise and purpose in front of the marbled stone. Steadfast and unwavering in strength because of her faith alone, even as the grand statue of the Saint starts crumbling down with the ceiling tiles falling around it.
It's a visual you're not likely to forget, carved deep into your memory before you flee with the rest. Sister Lucia is flustered as usual, ushering everyone as fast as she can near the grand oak doors that lead out to where additional shouting can be heard and only more pandemonium must await outside.
You're struck with the damning realization.
The gods — they have completely abandoned humankind.
"That would be ten demerits any other day," Sister Constance voice abruptly snaps, "fortunately for you, now is not the time for such things."
It's astonishing how even at this moment, the nun remains on high alert for 'troublemakers'. Her sharp-nailed fingers latch around your wrist as she breezes by — much too similar to when you've been dragged off to detention. And as if that's what's happening, your heels plant firmly in the ground and obstinately tug her back a step.
"What about Sister Meryl? We can't just leave!"
"If you knew what was good for you, you'll obediently obey me. But if you knew that, you'd recognize faithfulness will guide her and the rest of us to safety."
"Nothing guarantees —"
"Those who do not devote themselves truthfully will never understand. Should the Saint deem Sister Meryl's sacrifice to be in vain, then she has failed not only the Holy Bishop and our sacred bonds, but you — one she unnecessarily dotes on — as well."
You want to argue and protest as Sister Constance yanks you forward. But the faint tremors you feel despite the tight grip of her hand and the tensed jawline of the woman whose stoic face is normally unbreakable makes you pause.
She's shaken. She's unsure. She's wavering.
Sister Constance doubts.
And something about that thrills you. Terrifyingly so.
The shock of it all is as startling as the pale sunlight blinding your eyes when the chapel's heavy doors finally get thrown open. Grains of sand swirl through Little Ivywood, diluting the usual brightness of the glowing orbs in the sky and their powerful rays.
A sandstorm brews on the horizon.
That's the least of your worries, though. Blood stains the soil where shrapnel grazed tender flesh. Fellow orphans scream and cry out from their wounds as they struggle to get away from the captors attempting to drag them to the center of town.
With a chill, you alarmingly realize who they're trying to escape from. Women in black and white robes don a wild, crazed look on their faces. The ones who have raised and cared for parentless children throughout many years and tended to every need they could within their means.
The Blessed and Holy Sisterhood of Little Ivywood.
Sister Constance turns and you jump. Both at the horrors of the present and a reminder of how many times a quick movement of hers led to the sharp pain of a switch or ruler tearing into skin. An eerie sound of laughter rings out and your blood runs cold, eyes darting left and right for the source.
And then through the dust particles, looms the sinister silhouette of a figure in a long trench coat flapping in the wind. Spiked hair sticks straight up, retaining its menacing style despite the powerful wind gusts and emphasizing an already impressive height. You gulp, swearing there's a flash of metal followed by a fanged smirk that glints dangerously as Sister Constance tugs you closer to the terrifying shadow beast shrouded by sand swirling in the air.
A declaration of your given name — stern and cold. "Know that your purpose is being fulfilled, that you are serving the great —"
And then comes a shout of your name, this time from someone desperate and panicked. You're yanked forward and then suddenly catapulted backward, grunting at the impact of your body slamming against someone else's.
"You need to go! You need to get out of here!"
"Chan?!"
He clings to you, shifting so his back is to the nun only a few paces past the corner he dashed around for safety and to stall for time. Throwing a cautious look over his shoulder before whispering urgently, "Go! And don't look back!"
"What about you?"
"Don't mind me." The smooth leather of a satchel presses against your palm. "Get movin'!"
"But —"
"Seriously," the boy shoves you forward with a not-so-gentle push. You gape at the audacity and he waves his hand, like he's shooing away a pesky flying worm. Rude. "Please! I'll be right behind you but —"
An eruption of nearby gunfire and a series of high-pitched shing!-like noises interrupt him. He glances again over his shoulder. You cautiously step forward and his head whips back to let out a hiss.
"Chan, what's —"
"Need to grab a few more things, see if any other idiots need help. Just… just get out of town, wait for me by the rocks if it'll make you feel better." He smiles, though it doesn't make those brown eyes of his sparkle like usual. "It'll… it'll all be okay."
You're uncertain and scared. But something about Chan's speaking powers have always made you believe in the impossible. So, you nod resolutely while taking the bag from him and warn, "Promise you'll be safe."
"You hate those kinds of things."
It's true. To you, promises were only made to be broken. And yet…
"… And somehow you've changed my mind before."
The bangs of carnage draw closer. Louder.
"Fine, just go. Please! And don't look back!"
Acquiescing to his pleas, you sprint toward where he pointed. Sitting like giant sentinels lays an outcrop of boulders bordering the western edge of Little Ivywood. The desert is only two paces away, expanding outward into a desolate plain filled with the undulating slopes of dunes. Picking a sizable rock to hide behind, you keep watch for Chan, cringing at the distant sound of gunshots still rapidly being fired.
What was that? What did you see? And what did you almost get dragged into?
What was going on?
Boom!
It's an ear-shattering noise that causes even the great stones around you to tremble from the explosion. A flare of light so bright leaves you no choice but to look away to protect your eyes, ducking behind the rocks as a shield.
When you recover after it dissipates to see what just happened — Little Ivywood is no more.
It's gone.
"No…"
The tiny town reduced to only rubble and ash. What once were rows of square buildings stacked on top of each other to divert the view of a relatively flat lay of the land are now parallel to its surroundings.
"No… no… no…"
Gone.
You don't think twice about running toward the wreckage. Chan is there. Chan has to be there!
"No!"
And most importantly, he has to be alright.
Broken piles of the shoddy architecture littering the landscape prevents you from traversing too far. Bile rises in your throat as you desperately scan for a sign — any sign — for Chan. For survivors. For anyone. Even the air is still, no longer rippling with irritable heat waves and heavy gusts of wind because the blast was strong enough to ward off nature itself and the incoming sandstorm.
For now.
And during the futile search, that's when you spot him. On his knees with his back to you, slouched over in the only clear space amidst the destruction. The tattered fabric of a cerise garment hangs off the man's broad shoulders and pools around his body like a puddle of blood. Reddish-brown bangs tinged with black hang limply as his chin curls further and further into his chest.
I don't understand, you vent to yourself after a couple ungraceful vaults and stumbling through the debris to get closer. This bastard got what he wanted, did what he wanted, and won! So, why is he acting like that? Who destroyed his town? His people?
Finally, you're a couple steps behind him. Thankful, at the very least, for whatever weird state this man is in because it grants you the opportunity to approach and press the cold steel of your pistol to the side of his temple.
"Don't. Move."
You hope it comes out as the threatening command you intend it to be. There's a tense beat of silence as you wait for his next move until you realize he's doing exactly what you demanded.
Then he chuckles. A choked out, watery sort of sound. Your hands start shaking even as they press the barrel harsher against his head.
"Go ahead and shoot."
"Answer me first." Your voice becomes as unsteady as the quakes in your body and you rasp out, "Why… why'd you do it?"
His head lifts and you flinch, but he takes no further action besides staring blankly ahead at the ruins. "I wish I could tell you but… I've been asking myself the same question."
"I — you…! You wreak hell and havoc upon a whole innocent town and… and you don't even know why?!"
"Pathetic, isn't it?" The man laughs again, without a shred of humor. A gloved hand reaches up to wrap around the weapon and you momentarily falter at the force of him leaning into it. The weight pushing it closer into his skull seems hard enough to leave a nasty imprint, as if that should be a main concern right now. "I'd simply like to know how I did it."
"I —"
"Not loaded," he sighs and drops his hand, twisting around to actually get a proper look at whoever was holding him at gunpoint.
You're taken aback by the intensity of death radiating in those dark brown irises that casually observe you through amber-colored, cracked lenses. Your arms fall down, dumbfounded at the stranger's unflinching behavior, the pistol bumping into your thigh. He lets out a "tsk" and then pulls something out of his pocket.
In his opposite palm, clad in a fingerless glove unlike the left, rests a conical golden object. Though you've never seen one in real life before, you think you know what it is. The shape matches the hollow outlines when Chan disassembled the chambers of your gun.
"A cartridge," he says and you blink. "A bullet," he clarifies upon noticing your confusion. Then the man smiles encouragingly. "Go on. Take it."
You're incredulous. "You're okay with handing that over to me?"
"It's what you want, right?" There's a wistful look on his face. "This place… it was your home."
"No," you're quick to refute, shocked at such an automatic response. Then admitting, "I don't even know what a home is."
Innocent town, my ass, is what you derisively admit inward and snort at yourself.
The convent itself was far from comforting. The other orphans with their bright grins when Saint Meryl sang lullabies on the nights you couldn't sleep — those were the kinds of things that made it bearable.
Guilt.
"I — I —"
It overwhelms your senses. Rattling up your entire nervous system and settling a cruel, cruel weight in your chest. You hunch over, chest heaving, and throat burning. There's a thump as your gun falls to the ground, its silvery sharp edges becoming distorted, warped, and blurred through a film of unshed tears in your widened eyes.
"Should've… It should've —"
"Hey, hey…"
"It should've been me!"
The man rises to his full height, brushing off his clothes before crouching down. A sturdy hand grips your shoulder and dutifully encourages your gasping upper body into an upright position. Gently, ever so fragile, he bops your forehead with his and you subconsciously lean against the unexpected support.
He's near enough to ground you to something solid. But distant enough for two strangers whose first meeting is one amidst a crumbling town's travesty. With his close presence comes the scent of gun smoke, though not as bitterly pungent and putrid as you recall from before. It's subtle and smokey, reminiscent of the fire that Chan once proudly stoked in his makeshift forge.
Your body shakes as the tears finally slip free.
"All lives are equally precious, one shouldn't be sacrificed for another."
"… How can… how can you say that so… easily?"
The death-come-over look in his eyes changes to something faraway. Like he's seeing something beyond the destruction surrounding both of you. Those amber lenses don't have to be cracked to draw attention to the fracturing despair radiating behind them.
Then, he shakes his head and shrugs. "Because you should live even when those dear to you are gone. This world is made of love and peace, after all."
Your crying abruptly pauses with the natural effort it takes to let out a scoff. Ignoring your utter scorn and disbelief, the man's gaze drifts to the pistol still on the ground. The tip of a steel-toed boot kicks it up into the air with a flourish, single-handedly catching it to inspect the weapon with practiced ease.
"Live because there's a reason you survived, even if you loathe every second of it. You'll feel like you don't deserve it. But persevere because you should. Because that's what they would've wanted and you keep them alive by living yourself. A burden? Maybe. Why spend such a cursed blessing only dwelling in regret when you can do so much more?"
He offers the gun back, its handle extended in your direction.
"If nothing else, live for yourself most importantly. Help show the world the love and peace it deserves. Even if it couldn't afford to gift it to you. That's what life is all about. The ticket to the future is always blank!" Pausing, he shrugs with a regret-filled smile on his face. "At least that's what I was taught… and what I think."
"… Awfully full of optimism for some dude who wiped out a full town and doesn't even know why."
"Name's Seokmin," he returns, now sporting a cheeky grin as you cautiously reach out for the pistol. Only to be outsmarted with a literal 'sleight-of-hand' and meeting the warmth of fingers and a gloved palm instead of the expectation of hard, cold, and familiar steel.
"Huh?"
"Lee Seokmin, to be precise! And it's a pleasure to meet 'cha! Erm, despite the… terrible circumstances." Seokmin jiggles the gun in front of you with his other hand, almost taunting you to reach for it again.
You don't.
"And what do you call this lovely lady?"
"Nothing."
"A shame. But not everyone cares to name things, 'specially if they don't hold any value." He finally tosses it back and you barely manage to catch it in time with a scowl.
"Just haven't decided."
"I see! Mine's Geranium."
"Oh, like… the flower?"
He visibly perks up at that even further, a radiant smile showcasing two pointy fangs. "You've heard of it?"
"Well," you scratch your cheek, "the, uh, sisters gave a girl that name because of her hair."
There's an uncomfortable pause as the dreadful realization you'll never see those brilliant ruby locks bounce because of her excitement again settles back into your stomach. You swallow, eyes roaming the stranger in front of you for a distraction.
"Um… you must really like the color… red."
Seokmin glances down at the tatters of his scarlet clothes and shrugs. "I guess. Though the one I saw was red, I've heard they come in different colors."
"You've seen a plant? Like a plant plant? A real one! You know — that grows out of the ground and transforms and all that? It doesn't, well…"
Vegetation was a rarely discussed concept. The only thing you knew came out of the poorly written history books in the dusty library's darkest corner. In the desert outskirts, you had a better chance of finding ancient Earth technology that might still be intact to share its plethora of knowledge about the old world humans left behind than hope to find whatever resources the big cities had access to.
"Mm, yeah, a long time ago. But say," he jovially waves the cartridge from before and it glints in the setting rays of the suns. "Would you care to hear this man's story before shooting him?"
And of course, you listened. What other choice did you have, you who lost everything at once? But even back then, something small and precious was planted in the barren depths of your heart. That was just the beginning. It would continue to grow, watered and tended to under the sunny smile of Lee Seokmin — the destroyer of cities and a very wanted man across the planet.
You leave that tiny bit out during the recitation of your past to the inquisitive pastor. Though something you'll regrettably find out later is he's already got you all figured out.
Bastard.
"… So, that's how I met the infamous Lee Seokmin and didn't end up killing him," you declare with a flourish and take a satisfied gulp of cheap beer picked up from some abandoned mart along the way out of Little Jersey.
Draining another bottle dry, you toss away the metal cap, close one eye, and peer through the narrow bottleneck like it's a telescope — albeit a very poor one.
Through the distorted glass stretch endless sand dunes as far as the eye can see. Stars glitter and sparkle amid the glow of the full moons in orbit, temporarily dimmed by a puff of the roguish's man's cigarette that wafts through the inky darkness.
You wonder if he'd be willing to share one.
"A shame," Seungcheol grumbles and offers a white stick from his pocket.
You take it eagerly only to see it's nothing but — a lollipop. The hard candy's become a strange gooey consistency thanks to melting in the desert heat all day and partially re-solidifying during the nighttime's chilly air.
It's stale too.
Fucker.
You let out a disdainful sniff but nod in agreement to his statement. "It is. But he promised me something. Then his bounty increased from a meager six million to sixty billion double dollars after destroying July, putting a hole in the moon, and all that. So… following him around has paid off."
"I guess," he shrugs, "guess I don't really care 'bout yer lil meet-cute story."
You gape at the audacity. "You're the one who fuckin' asked!"
"Well… figured we could bond, ya know? Orphans 'n all that cozy, feel-good shit."
"You know, not a single thing I've said thus far coud be classified as 'cute'."
"Uh-huh."
"And I never took you to be a sentimental fool."
"Hey, now —"
You hold up a hand. "'Thou shall not bear false witness'."
"As if ya even know what that means," Seungcheol retorts and flicks the ashy cigarette stub in your direction, the cross around his neck ironically reflecting in the moonlight. "Was gonna say, if anythin', I put the mental in sentimental, sweet'art."
Well, you certainly wouldn't argue with that point. "…What I do know is that you're doing this all. For him."
"'Ol Needle Noggin, eh?"
"Well… yeah. But he's only part of a bigger picture for you."
"… 'S none o' yer business, ya know? Best to know less."
Your eyes roll. "Sure. That's why you nearly got hit by our car 'cause you wore a suit into the desert and didn't bring a drop of water. All while hauling that stupid, big-ass cross around! And then you insist on joining us — try to scam us! — but hey," you put your hands up, "none of my business."
"Wasn't tryna scam —"
"Hella shady, man... Hella. fuckin'. shady." You're shocked you can see the man's eyes roll in a begrudging defeat behind his black sunglasses — at night, no less — but you nudge him. "C'mon, just tell me! I bet it has to do with Hopeland, something… or someone back at that orphanage."
"Anyone told ya how irritatin' ya are?"
"Only the ones that are equally just as annoying!"
"Tch, woman." Seungcheol messes up the back of his black hair, mouth opening as he cracks his jaw. There's a pregnant pause. "… 'Han was… he was different. Ya wouldn't get it."
"Try me. Evidently you weren't listening very well, were you?" No surprise there. You retrieve the locket that takes refuge beneath your top, a familiar oval swinging from its long chain between the two of you. "Believe it or not, I do get it."
His eyes fixate on it like a pendulum, darting to your face, and then up to the sky. A crooked smile quirks up the corner of his mouth and he lets out a resigned sigh. "Ya really love 'im, don'tcha?"
You feel a funny sensation.
Akin to getting caught in a horde of flying worms and trying to squash down as many as you can. Your answer is hushed and Seungcheol snickers. Unbeknownst to the two of you that an additional pair of ears — assumed to be asleep — also catches your whispered reply.
"So, how much ya gonna pay for confessin'?" the pastor goads and lets out a startled yelp when you try to smash the hand-held bank he totes around that's shaped like a cathedral.
"Oh, go to hell, Choi!"
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"Stare any longer and you'll no longer be needin' Sirocco." An amused snicker follows the relaxed drawl. "Bullets're 'bout to start flyin' outta those eyes 'stead of that gun o' yers."
You scowl at the dumb man seated next to you. "It's not like subtlety has ever been a strong suit of yours. But could you at least pay better attention to your surroundings?" A meager amount of golden liquid sloshes against the sides of the glass you pointedly wave around. "Or are you already too drunk to forget where we are?"
"Ain't no lightweight," Seungcheol brags with his fourth pint of the night in hand and a rapacious grin cockily tilting the empty lollipop stick in the corner of his mouth upward. "Can't say the same for the rest, though. Whiskey's stronger than a punch to the gut."
"… You would know. I'm sure it might just taste like water to some by now."
While it might initially elate most visitors to order as many rounds of the only available beverage on the menu as possible, the reality of the situation was much more grim. As if he can read your mind, the man clad in black, gray, and muted silvers flippantly reminds you of why your so-called merry band of travelers are even here.
"Needle Noggin said 'e fixed the Plant up just fine 'n dandy, so here's hopin' we get some clean bathwater t'night."
At those words, your gaze instinctively shoots back to where it focused earlier. Seungcheol snorts and drains his glass with a satisfactory sigh before poking more fun at you.
"Gonna put a hole through his head at this point."
"Not like that's anything new."
"Yeah, but rather than constantly laserin' holes through his skull, ya should be tryna convince him to fill yers up, instead. 'N not referrin' to that empty space behind yer forehead."
"I know exactly what you mean, you perverted freak."
That cracks Seungcheol up. "'N here I was thinkin' ya was gonna end up a nun servin' the Eye of Joshua!"
By now, you're well-accustomed to the hedonistic ways of the man who still keeps a leather band with a cross on it strapped across his Adam's apple, sewn into the cuffs of his black suit, and carries the hulking shape of one on his weary shoulders.
Unfazed, you fire back, "If they even let someone like you into the blessed and holy ranks, then any whore off the streets would be welcome to join."
It's a series of light-hearted jabs you both take in stride. The truth is much darker and deeper, but tonight serves as a tiny snapshot away from the normal weariness of day-to-day survival in Gunsmoke. Right now, you celebrate alongside the residents of Tonim what peace could really look like in the future.
Except you're on edge.
For a reason that's silly compared to the usual adrenaline rush of tracking down Plants nearing red status and defending the area, all the while trying to prevent the inevitable destruction and chaos to follow. Still, it's why you beckon the bartender over for another refill as a positively "tickled-pink" Seungcheol not-so-silently judges.
"Now who's staring?"
"'Kay, but's not with unbridled lust and — " He's cut off by a sharp kick to the side of his shin delivered by one of your heavy combat boots. "And feelin's," gets wheezed out before the pastor falls silent at your nasty scowl paired with Wonwoo's timely arrival.
The saloon owner and de facto authority in town approaches the two of you cautiously. It's no secret who you are, who you're with. What you do and the things that follow when you do what you do. And yet what you've done has saved the town and given its people — especially the younger folk — something that some of them have never experienced before.
Hope.
And that seems to be good enough proof for Wonwoo. Rumors may just be rumors, after all. None of you are like the reports relayed in a tinny voice through the virtually enhanced radios that are non-plant-powered — aka illustriously dubbed by their inventor as VERnons.
"… the Bloody Rain… follows… Lee… Humanoid Typhoon… armed… dangerous. Punisher… cross… machine gun… two unknown… likely… agents…. Bernardelli Insurance…"
The VERnon sitting behind the counter splutters out bits and pieces of information. He side-eyes the device awkwardly and starts fumbling with the buttons, trying to mumble over the static and monotonous voice.
"Can I pour you another drink?"
"Sure," you chuckle, pleased.
The bartender's well-intentioned efforts are fruitless which is to be expected. Only the creator, and those he personally taught, could truly modify the invention as pleased. A part of you hoped to find evidence Hansol had traveled this far but alas, he was probably still searching through the seven major cities for his beloved Milly before attempting to wander through the treacherous wastelands.
A brown, short-haired darling sneaks awe-filled glances at the two of you from the corner where a group of women around your age gather to chat. Seungcheol's the first to catch onto the admiring starry-eyed gaze and winks. Chuckling when a pudgy hand clings tighter to one of the lady's long skirt, using the fabric as a demure little shield against his effortless charisma.
You catch the tail-end of the interaction with the ghost of a smile. If there's one thing that can definitely soften Seungcheol's rough edges, it's children. You can't blame him, reminded of cheery voices and energetic footsteps pounding after your own through the convent's hallways.
The attractive woman wonders what's drawing the younger girl's attention and leans down to whisper in her ear. Gesturing in your direction, you watch as she nods encouragingly and offers a gentle smile, pushing the tiny brunette forward who readily toddles over. The gaps still waiting for pearly white teeth to grow in that shy smile on the little girl's face are endearingly winsome.
"'Lo, Wonu."
The bespectacled man starts, eyes wide as he peers over the counter and just manages to glimpse the top of her mousy brown tufts. "Is that you, Lina? You're not supposed to be here."
"Past yer bedtime, lil one?"
She huffs indignantly at the two men, hands on her hips. "I've once stayed up 'til four in the morning, mister!"
"Oh, Lina…"
"Besides, how can anyone of good standing sleep properly when there's heroes in town?"
"Huh, what a darlin' angel!"
You scoff at your comrade's words. "As if you've ever seen one."
"I do beg your pardon," Wonwoo scrambles to excuse the child's enthusiasm. "Looks like another talk is due with, uh, Sheryl."
"You're just jealous, Wonu. Sherry says they're heroes."
A chubby finger points at you and Seungcheol and the bartender clicks his tongue — partially in reproach and the other half out of embarrassment. The two of you hardly pay any attention to his reaction, seeming to not mind her boldness at all.
"That's right, sweet'art. And don'tchu forget now." In fact, a certain cross-wearing man revels in it. He rummages deep in his pocket and pulls out a lollipop with a flourish. "'N here's a lil magic gift for ya, princess."
You're one step faster, snatching it and unwrapping the candy with a quick inspection. At least it looks fresh and clean. Seungcheol snorts. Ignoring him, you crouch down and hand it to Lina with a gentle smile.
"Remember to be careful with what you take from strangers."
"I know! But you're heroes… and heroes are always good people! You would never hurt me!" Those blue-green eyes are certainly dazzling as she stares into yours, reminiscent of the clean water now filling the town's reservoir. "You're very pretty."
"That might be the highest compliment I've ever received."
"Pretty people don't hurt anyone either! Sherry's super pretty and she's the gentlest I know!"
A very pretty pastor himself snickers for multiple reasons. Meanwhile, Wonwoo laments with a tired sigh, "Dunno what that crazy woman's been teaching her, I swear…"
"You're not supposed to talk about people you like like that, Wonu!" Lina gives them both the stink eye but returns her attention to focus solely on you — Tonim's loveliest savior in her teal-eyed view. "Will I grow up to be as pretty as you?"
Ah, how your heart aches.
"Even prettier."
"I…" She gnaws on her lip, as if it does anything to hide how much her pleased grin glows. "I wanna be a hero, too!"
"Don't see why you wouldn't become one." To you, she already is — in all her innocent radiance and glory.
"Gotta grow big 'n strong first, missy."
"I am strong!"
"Don't doubt it. But wait 'til yer at least twice my age 'fore ya go swingin' at thugs."
She wrinkles her nose. "I'll be in the grave like Grammy if I wait that long, old man!"
Seungcheol guffaws at her unexpected remark and you hear the bartender beg, "Lina, please!" But you focus on all the brilliance in front of you — from precious unkempt locks to blue eyes full of fire and finally to the worn out, dust-covered shoes.
"Hopefully you'll never need a reason to be the hero, though. It's our duty to keep that from happening."
There's too much hidden meaning and brutal experience in your words for her to fully understand. The lull gives a certain pastor an opportunity to sidle back into the conversation, ready to get up to no good as always.
"Ya wanna meet the hero of all heroes, darlin'?"
"Choi —"
"Yeah!" Lina claps ecstatically.
"Go 'head 'n give 'er yer second key," he coaxes quietly with a shit-eating smirk.
"I swear!"
"C'mon… never like keepin' such a sweet gal waitin'!"
After a minute's hesitation, you begrudgingly agree and take it out.
"Thank ya. Now, got a lil mission for ya, Miss Hero-in-the-Makin'."
"Really?!"
Barely able to conceal her exuberance, she reverently takes the key like it's actual gold and not simply plated. Seungcheol ruffles her hair affectionately.
"Y'see the man in all purple?"
"Mhm, yeah! The one that looks like the night sky?"
"Yeah, give 'im it. Make sure to say it's from this pretty lady."
"Choi!"
"Talk to 'im too 'cause he'll love that. He's a real hero, y'know? Truest of 'em all."
"Yes, sir!"
"Attagirl."
Lina scurries off and you turn back to the counter with a sour glare directed at Seungcheol. "What was that all about?"
"Dunno, cute?"
"I'm really sorry about that all," Wonwoo apologetically interrupts with the offer of another refill which is readily accepted. "She… she's very excitable."
"No need for apologizin', man."
"Yeah, she's adorable. Is she yours?"
The bespectacled bartender stutters, almost dropping the glass he's handing to you. "That's, uh, that's my sister!"
"Ah, makes sense! Didn't mean to assume."
He flushes and turns away. But not without mumbling something about it being okay and your comrade groans.
"Reminder — ya get too drunk, 'm not dealin' with ya ass."
"Great, I don't want you near my ass."
"'S not what I meant!"
"Yeah, yeah."
Seungcheol downs another shot and you're quick to follow his lead once Wonwoo hands over another refill per your shared request. However, this time, the stoic man surprisingly lingers and awkwardly fiddles with his wire-rimmed frames, doing his very best to not let his eyes wander your scantily clad figure as your head tilts back to swallow the burning alcohol.
Meanwhile, the pastor's grin turns wolfish.
"So, uh, who are you, really?"
"Curious, eh?" You lean comfortably onto the counter, braced by your forearms and an alluring smile on your face for the handsome saloon owner. His gaze drifts down to your scar-covered hands which also happen to be placed conveniently underneath your breasts.
You'd once said the best disguise and toughest armor was none at all. And why not flaunt your assets — literally — and put them to good use. The desert is hot anyways!
Seungcheol and Seungkwan both called bullshit. Mingyu applauded you and waved his "I respect women's rights, wrongs, and all the above no matter what!" flag. Seokmin — already used to your behavior and attire — had nothing else to say other than his normal quips of, "As long as you're comfortable".
"Well, a-a beautiful woman like yourself has to have everyone wondering."
And you laughed in the face of your haters every time it worked.
"Just a bounty hunter."
Wonwoo nods at the casual answer, recalling the holster strapped around the plush of your thigh beneath short denim shorts. "Where from?"
"Well… around. My hometown was destroyed so…"
"Oh? Same here."
"Ah, camaraderie." You jab a thumb menacingly in the direction of the purple-cloaked figure and the life of tonight's celebration, currently animatedly chattering to Lina. "That's why I'm turning him in."
"He's…?"
"Yup, Lee Seokmin. Yes," you confirm with a smirk at the way Wonwoo's eyes bug out behind his glasses, "that one — the infamous humanoid typhoon. Don't worry, he won't hurt anything or anyone here."
"He's… uh, he's not quite what I expected."
"Yeah, tell me about it."
"You must be pretty badass to reign him in. Heard he's giving what's left of the July regime officers a run for their double dollars."
"For sure. But it's thanks to the other two drunkards, really. Believe it or not, they're Bernardelli insurance agents. Raven-haired one's Seungkwan and the tall one is Mingyu. They're helping to monitor that whopping bounty of mine and prevent any more disasters from happening. Heard I might get a bump in value if I bring him in alive."
"Oh, well, it looks like it's working. And he seems… willing? To come with you?"
"The irony. Always been quite blasé about facing his doom."
"He's really a Plant engineer, too?"
"Of sorts," you huff at his visible confusion but wave your empty glass. "Can I get another?"
He's more than happy to accommodate and returns with two, sliding one over to Seungcheol with a cautious look at the person who seems the closest to you. "And this is…?"
"Pastor. Pleased to meet'cha."
"Oh! Really?"
"A surprising addition to the mix, yeah. But everyone needs to, like, pray sometimes." And under your breath, low enough so only a certain man can hear, "no matter how sketchy they are."
"Do you, hm, officiate weddings?"
The one in question quirks a thick eyebrow. "Ya lookin' to get hitched, boy?"
"M-maybe."
And Seungcheol feels wholly compelled to bless him silently from the bottom of his blackened heart with full sincerity, seeing as how the bespectacled man timidly peeks your way before his gaze darts elsewhere. "Sorry lad, charge 'bout a thousand double dollars minimum."
While the solitary bartender crashes back into the sad reality of capitalism, you jab your elbow into the pastor's ribcage. "Fuckin' scammer."
"Only the best of the best! Ya know, sixty billion's still on the table — 'n it better be callin' my name."
"No one even has sixty billion double dollars!"
"We have 'im." And he points back to where hoots and hollers erupt from the center table of the saloon.
Lina's returned to the woman she was with earlier — presumably her beloved Sherry — but that doesn't mean Seokmin's alone. There's so much disdain in your side-eye, spotting the busty violet-haired sweetheart his arm wraps around. After all, he's the worst kind of ladykiller.
And by that, you mean he absolutely sucks at flirting and can't get or keep a partner to save his life. Yet you're constantly stuck witnessing women, men, and attractive people of all kinds throw themselves at the good-looking man until he opens his mouth and they're put off by his clear lack of suaveness or strange little idiosyncrasies.
"Stop with the stupid bet, it's not happening. Nobody's going to be winning a thing."
"It's called usin' the damn 'magination, darlin'!"
"Which means you need to get better hobbies. You've corrupted my friends!"
"Hah! Them fools were already too invested in this 'fore I ever came along."
"Fill me up again?"
Intent on ignoring Seungcheol, you belatedly realize how aggressive your request comes across. You're also eager for something to help soothe ache in your chest. It comes and goes like a bad toothache — manageable enough to forget about the pain until it returns tenfold.
Thankfully, Wonwoo meekly complies with the back tips of his ears tinged red and Seungcheol barely manages to hide his extreme amount of mirth for the situation behind another glass. In the dim lighting, at certain angles, and with another shot of whiskey settling into your system, you conclude that the handsome saloon owner could certainly pass as Seokmin's brother and vice versa.
But you know the truth.
Familiar with the one who's all too identical to the infamous gunslinger, yet entirely different altogether. Irritation flares in your gut, prickling harsh enough that even the burn of alcohol fails to drown it out.
"I'm turning in for the night."
"Smartin' idea."
"Don't get too smashed."
"You should get smashed."
"Bye, Choi."
Tipsiness is a great excuse to bump purposely into him as you get off the stool. It's only thanks to his genetically enhanced metabolism that the pastor's able to stay upright. He grumbles something that's likely insulting, but standing upright causes you to realize you drank way too much. Everything spins or sways, including your body as you stumble up the stairs.
Somehow, you safely make it to the second level. Above the saloon is a hallway of small bedrooms that Wonwoo generously loans out to routine drunkards or stray travelers. It takes a few minutes of fumbling around but you finally find the lock that matches the first of its paired key and tumble face-first into (thankfully clean) bedsheets.
A hazy mix of drifting in and out of consciousness follows. It's not until the door clicks and there's an ominous creak of floorboards followed by a noticeable presence creeping up at your side that fully rouses you from the feverish dreams of gunfire, explosions, and loss that still plague your mind to this day.
You roll over, intending to assume both an offensive and defensive position against the nighttime visitor, but a hand lands on your shoulder before you can. Still sluggish, there's no way you could ever hope to outmatch the humanoid typhoon, even at your best.
"Hey, you."
It takes a bit for your eyes to adjust to the darkness after hearing his voice — and then there he is. Sitting on the edge of the bed, Seokmin greets you with a fond, megawatt grin. The thumb of his cybernetic prosthesis gently traces little circles over your bare skin. There's a faint hum and glow from its advanced tech mechanics, paired with moonbeams from the window, casting off an ethereal radiance.
"So, you're staying here tonight?"
"But of course, isn't that why you sent such a cute little cherub my way?"
Ah, Lina. You unwittingly smile, remembering how joyful she was to accomplish her mission.
Then your eyes close, nose wrinkling at the copious stench of mixed perfumes and alcohol he brought in and refusing to acknowledge what he says.
"You hella reek."
"Says the one who drank over seven shots."
"… That preacher's a fuckin' tattler. And a liar. And a total scammer. Don't fall for him, Seok."
"Now, what makes you think Seungcheol told me, hm?" He leans down almost nose-to-nose, enough to make yours scrunch even more at the buzzing feeling of how near he is. Your eyes open to squint at him and he winks. "Silly boy tried to mess with god again and max out his intake. Spoiler alert, he failed. Mingyu dragged him back to his room."
"You're the only one I know who can call Choi a 'silly boy'."
"'Cause that's what he is."
"And you need to stop acting like my babysitter!"
You shift away from his gorgeous face and he leans back to give you space, sporting a smug grin. "Then who would take care of you, mayfly?"
"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?"
"Be nice to me and maybe I won't keep count on how many glasses you down next time," he teases. "But since I'm so kind and forgiving, would you like a nice, warm, relaxing bath?"
Well, it did sound wonderful. TMI, but cleanliness was a luxury when traveling the desert. Even more so when the places you arrived at had Plant issues. Luckily, Seokmin was more than capable of fixing them but even then, circumstances varied. Especially around the one known across Gunsmoke as mankind's first localized human disaster.
"Only if you get one, too."
It slips from your mouth without a thought. But you might as well have told Seokmin you'd gotten him a box full of doughnuts with how delightedly he clasps his hands together.
"As you wish, m'lady!"
And he treats you like one, scooping you up into his arms in a princess-style carry. At least tonight you're more willing to let him do as he wishes, especially when he discards the perfume-infused outerwear. Whiskey, sleepiness, and the smooth material of his undershirt keep you pliant and cuddly well after he'd snatched you off the bed.
Seokmin's already ten times stronger than even a human like Mingyu and his prosthesis only helps take further advantage of that fact. He easily deposits you on the edge of the tub. Normal routine would require untying the tight laces on your combat boots but since you'd kicked them off prior to resting, he skips to the next step.
Deft fingers make quick work unbuttoning your shorts, the prosthetic digits of his left hand then moving to loosen the straps that keep your top on. His other hand holds them together in a pseudo-knot to keep the material in place.
Honoring a sense of modesty, you suppose — even though you've seen each other unclothed before. But you melt into the secure press of his palm paired with the support of his chest against your back as he leans over to turn on the water.
"Let me know if it's a good temperature."
"M'kay."
"You're so agreeable when drunk!"
"And you're still just as annoying."
"Okay, okay," he relents. Amicably even.
Seokmin never enjoys butting heads like Seungcheol constantly does. Although another "mayfly," gets tacked on to the end of his playful yield in a mischievous tone because if there is one thing, it's that he can never tease you enough.
Brown eyes quietly trace the ink and scars that mark your skin, some disappearing or completely hidden beneath the parts that are covered. Finally, they land on the silver chain around your neck, only a breadth away from the tip of his fingers that suddenly twitch at how soft you feel beneath the calloused roughness of his own skin.
You let out a little sigh and it shakes him from his reverie, noticing the tub's filled up past your calves. Guiding one of your hands to where the locket lies beneath your clothes covering your chest, he stands. "Call me if you need anything or just want help getting out, m'lady."
"'Kay."
You're already stripping bare but Seokmin breezes out the door before you can blink. You sigh again and slip into the hot water, enjoying a soak to ease the heaviness you feel.
It's hard to understand this emotional turmoil. Knowing that you don't enjoy feeling this way, you make a false promise to not drink ever again, staying submerged in the water until your fingers wrinkle.
Maybe you fell asleep, maybe you didn't. There's a bathrobe laid on the sink when you're ready to get out that you don't remember from before but who knows. Who cares? It's cozy and you haven't felt this clean in a while.
"All yours," you lazily declare, stepping into the bedroom.
Seokmin perks up from where he casually sits cross-legged on the bed, fiddling with Geranium. A dopey smile lights up his face, gaze moving from the hefty nickel revolver and zoning in on you.
"All mine?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah," he repeats quieter, more to himself, "all mine…" But when you unconsciously shiver, his eyes flash and brows furrow. "C'mere, I warmed the bed up for you."
"Aren't you going to bathe?"
"Yep, so don't miss me too much, my dear mayfly!"
He accompanies it with a saucy wink and saunters into the bathroom, humming. You find yourself in a bit of a daze, head and cheeks holding onto the heat of the steam from your bath (and more). You change into a light tank and cotton shorts before sitting back down. As promised, where Seokmin rested was indeed warm and smells of faint gun smoke that always brings back memories.
"Total slaughter…!"
Splash!
"… Total slaughter…"
Splash!
"I won't leave… a single man alive."
Splash! Splash!
"La de da de dai~," echoes from the bathroom. "Genocide…"
Splash.
"La de da de duh," splash, splash, splash, "an ocean… of blood."
"Let's begin… the killing time."
Seokmin possessed a lovely melodic voice no matter how nonsensical or gruesome the words he sang. Your eyes close with relaxation as he continues into a different tune. Though the lyrics are definitely more hopeful this time, there's a heavy sense of underlying desolation despite the rapid, upbeat tone.
"So…" splash, "on the first evening," splash, "a pebble from somewhere out of nowhere drops upon the dreaming world…"
You think back to how he silently cried when he thought no one was looking after a young stowaway on the sandsteamer broke into the same nostalgic song. Your heart aches in empathy for the woman whose heroic sacrifice saved humankind but left behind irreparable damage to twins she adored.
Rem Saverem.
She was to Seokmin as what Saint Meryl was to you. But your fondness for the nun who dared to favor one random orphan above the other equally ordinary ones with an unprecedented amount of kindness paled in comparison to the devotion Seokmin exhibited for Rem. Her kindness, hope, and love for and of life didn't simply become Seokmin's philosophies — they were a true part of every fiber, woven into his very being.
He was peculiar. Hardheaded — or in Seungkwan's affectionate term: a hardass — when it came to nonviolence. A true pacifist. Even when enemies held him at gunpoint, allies turned their backs on him, and his choice to always save was at the very cost of his well being… Seokmin would choose to tear himself apart limb by limb before ever causing damage or letting harm come to another.
And even if he always chose the world and those living in it first before anything else, that's what you loved the most about him.
"What's got you making that face?"
You're quick to school whatever expression it might be. Your tongue feels fuzzy. You purse your lips as he lumbers closer, freshly dressed in a comfy white long-sleeved shirt and black sweats.
"What face?"
"You know, the one where something's weighing on your mind."
The bed frame dips and squeaks when he flops down to snuggle against you. Still-damp, reddish-brown bangs lay across your shoulder and dampen your skin. The chilled press of the gold hoop in his left earlobe raises bumps wherever it touches as he endearingly nuzzles you.
"There is."
"Tell me."
"You need to dry your hair properly."
"Do it for me."
"… This is on purpose, isn't it?"
Nevertheless, you take the unused towel around his neck and vigorously rub at his head. No complaints or protests defending his honor come from Seokmin. Just the usual little trills of contentment escape as he leans into your touch. Once you're satisfied the job's done well, he plucks the towel from your hands and you fix him with a stern look.
"Well, Seok? You gonna answer me?"
He curls in on his lanky frame, enough so to find room to plop his head pitifully onto your thighs and nuzzle the bare skin with his nose. "Not if you won't answer me first."
"You."
"Hm?"
"Was… thinking about you."
"Oh, really? Dreaming about how cool, dashing, handsome, and awesome I am?"
"… Yeah. I like you."
He chuckles, closing his eyes. More so at the feeling of your fingers idly playing with his strands of hair than seriously taking what you say. "I like you, too!"
"No, I mean," you jostle him harshly as you shift anxiously, tugging a little too hard at his roots. "Something's wrong with me."
"… Mhm yeah, you've been drinking."
"Goddamnit, Seok… that was like hours ago! But… what if… what if I'm in love with you?"
Your fingers retract like you've been caught red-handed stealing Mingyu's pudding and a millisecond later, Seokmin's head flies off your lap as he sits up to stare incredulously at you and can only gasp out one word, "What?"
It comes out more like a statement than a question. You've seen all kinds of emotions appear in those clear brown eyes of his. Emptiness. Excitement. Happiness. Fear. Loneliness. Mysteriousness. Pain. But now, you can hardly make sense of what turmoil is swimming in those murky depths.
"There's no way," he shakes his head — laughter high and brittle. "Fake", is what Seungcheol occasionally points out whenever he spies the gunslinger's smile. You've never believed him until now. "You're drunk."
Seokmin's been hurt before and you know that. It's why you wish for him to be nothing but happy, that there's some truth to the joy he constantly tries to radiate. Hoping some parts are really healing, that he's giving time to let the bloody wounds coagulate — if even just a little.
"It's me. I mean, I'm the one that's drunk," he reiterates, shaking his head.
"Why are you acting like that?"
"… Like what?"
Perhaps you were too hopeful.
"Like I'm making some sort of mistake. Like I'm wrong about this. About us."
And still under the influence of the too-damn-strong alcohol.
"It's… none of that, it's just…"
"You think I don't know what I'm talking about."
"Well, do you?" he fires back rather harshly, "'cause you're still wearing that thing and —"
You wince as his voice breaks off, palm instinctively flying to where the locket rests. "What the hell does that have to do with anything right now? I thought we were over this! Years ago!"
"Maybe you were since you continue to stubbornly follow me everywhere!"
"I'm not the only one!"
"Yeah, 'cause no one ever listens to me!"
"I always listen to you, Seok. Even if the words that come out of your mouth don't match how you actually feel —"
"You don't know how I feel!"
Silence.
Seokmin's chest heaves, wide eyes taking in how you immediately freeze. That look, oh, that look on your face could kill him and his body moves on auto-pilot to stand, directing his gaze to stare daggers into the floorboards. Begging them to rip off like a bandaid and shield him from your wrath.
The wood beneath his feet groans, shaking ever the slightest.
"You're right. How dare I?"
"Wait, mayfly… I —" he switches gears with a plea of your given name.
"And obviously, you have no fuckin' idea how I feel." Now it's your turn to let out a disingenuous chuckle, fake humor cracking under the pressure of sadness it's struggling to mask. "You think all I'm after is revenge more than the actual thought even crosses my mind. You put on this show that nothing bothers you, make assumptions that no one can keep up with you, that you can do it all on your own."
"No, that's not… that's not what I meant! You know how dangerous —"
You stumble ungracefully off the bed, flinching away when Seokmin's words break off as he automatically reaches out. For you. To support and for support.
Yet, it hurts all the more.
"But what do I even know? How can I, when you keep everyone at arm's length? It's like… it's like I don't even know who you are! Like you're someone else, someone I'll never get to understand…"
To others, it might not make sense, possibly the dumbest thing you could say — especially with the state you're in. But you know Seokmin, a fact he's subconsciously taken comfort in.
But you also know Seokmin. Which means you know the exact place to hit him where it hurts the most.
And suddenly, those words you say propel him back into a moment from the past, body free-falling in the sky.
Yelling. Crying. Screaming. Pleading.
Begging that exact phrase and being demanded of the same accusation. All from the one who's falling with him. Whose face mirrors his own, but couldn't be more different in that crucial and devastating moment.
His brother. His twin. His other half who was once his everything — now a total stranger from the person he thought he knew.
A fifty-year-old reunion that should've been a reconciliation, turned into a doomsday.
And for you, the once simple toothache pain is now overwhelming your full body and you refuse to let him see how it's dampened your cheeks. Especially when you hear the pained whisper of the name that escapes his mouth when you're the one that triggered those awful memories. Staggering to the door, you yank it open and he instinctually takes a step forward.
Don't leave me.
You hear the unspoken plea as clearly as if spoken aloud.
"Don't follow me," is what you hiss out instead, and just like when you first met, Seokmin obeys.
When Seungkwan makes room arrangements — if there is enough money to spare when needed and the options are available — he books everyone their own private space. More often than not though, he and Mingyu share a room and so do you and Seokmin.
Out of everyone in the group, you're the only one who is used to putting up with Seokmin's idiosyncrasies and the constant white noise of the cybernetic prosthetics's technology. You've rarely paid mind to having your own space unless Seokmin gets in one of those rare 150-year-old moods and wants some time by himself. Rare in nature, because he doesn't enjoy being left alone with his thoughts that threaten to consume him.
But he'll have to make due tonight. For the first time, you're extremely grateful for Seungkwan's pro-activeness.
You lock the door, crawl into a fresh cold bed, and wet a new pillow — one that lacks the comforting scent of gun smoke — with unshed tears.
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For all his short-tempered and sassy mannerisms, Seungkwan is quite the worrywart. When the suns have peeked past the horizon and you're not already downstairs bullying Seungcheol, he's immediately knocking at your door and inquiring about your well-being. You assure him you're just hungover and he reluctantly leaves you be, likely picking up on how terrible you really do sound.
By high noon, Mingyu raps on the door next. He even sweetly offers to share his prized pudding in the hopes that you'll peek your head out. Though you appreciate it, you send him away, too — after reassuring the sensitive man you'll feel better after some rest.
Seungcheol doesn't miss the chance to be annoying times ten. He doesn't indulge in the effort of knocking, opting to make the floorboards squeal by pacing back and forth in front of the door. All the while, muttering this and that about "yer boy's like a pathetic dog and blah, blah, blah" until getting very kindly told to "fuck off!" and dragged back downstairs by a certain raven-haired insurance agent.
Even Seokmin checks in. Four times.
Once and then twice after you'd left and he'd figured out which room was yours. Then two more visits throughout the following day. He doesn't exactly make his presence known — but you know he knows you know he's out there.
If not by the distinct gait you've picked up on listening for after all this time, then by the hesitant thuds of combat boots lingering outside your door. Lost technology whirring with the action it takes to make a fist with his left hand, raising it up to the door and then back down again in self-inflicted defeat.
You refuse to see anyone, choosing to pity yourself first. Wallowing in your feelings and then sleeping as much of the heartache — and more so the hangover — away.
When the moons are visible in accordance to their nightly orbit, you get up to fuss with the mini VERnon in the room's corner. Nothing but static greets you. At the very least, the white noise is better than complete silence. By the time it's morning, you slowly awaken to the virtually enhanced radio trying to catch onto a faint signal. Enough to report the latest news in snippets with its mechanical voice.
"Beast… reported… Tonim town… !"
Your eyes fly open. Now is not the time to be wasting away. Donning a clean set of attire similar to what you wore into town — and with Sirocco strapped comfortingly to your thigh — you descend downstairs.
"Good morning!" Mingyu cheerfully greets with a delighted shout of your name and eagerly waves you over to sit next to him, waving around a promised cup of pudding. "Are you feeling better?"
"Mhm, thanks. Sorry about that, whiskey here sure is strong."
"'S one helluva killer," Seungcheol sulks across from you, still sporting a massive headache and looking worse than that one time Seungkwan hit him with the car.
"You're just weak."
"Wha'zat say 'bout you?"
"Since I can equally acknowledge both my strengths and weaknesses, that makes me infinitely stronger than you'll ever be."
Seungkwan wordlessly hands you a bowl and you graciously accept it. Next to the pastor sits Seokmin, unnaturally quiet. You don't even spare him a glance even though brown eyes burn into the side of your face until you glare his way.
The stack of doughnuts on the plate in front of him remain untouched — minus the smudged icing on one that was likely from Seungcheol trying to swipe it. Evidently, Seokmin was in low spirits if he didn't want to consume his favorite desserts. But, he is still prideful enough to prevent anyone else from snatching the prized delicacy.
How typical.
An awkwardness ensues, charged with an underlying current of tension. A vein forms in Seungkwan's forehead from his blood pressure rising.
Its pulse matches the twitch in the corner of his fake smile as he attempts to make conversation, to which Mingyu — oblivious and happy-go-lucky as ever, bless his heart — replies enthusiastically. Seungcheol stares listlessly into space, twirling a lollipop around and around with his tongue. Next to him is a soul acting like a thunderstorm's personally pouring over him. Seokmin starts pitifully poking at his grand doughnut pile while you ferociously tear into a piece of bread like it's the last supper before swallowing.
"Soonyoung's coming."
Your unexpected, but welcomed, interruption ironically pauses Seungkwan's second diatribe about Hansol's calamitous ingenuity. If possible, the apprehension in the room intensifies tenfold.
Seungkwan raises an eyebrow. "How'd you hear?"
"Tuned the VERnon last night."
"'Course you did."
"Something about the Beast and Tonim came through. Not for sure but…"
"It never hurts to be too prepared!"
"True, 'Gyu. 'N if Soonyoungie's gonna be there, ya know what that likely means…"
You nod in understanding at Seungcheol's implication. "The Crimsonnail."
Seokmin's jaw clenches at the name but it's the disgruntled pastor who continues speaking after a hearty and loud gulp of water. "'Course the Eye of Joshua's gonna send their best two. Soonyoungie's Hoon's eyes 'n ears for these kinda things."
"Or… it could be Jeonghan."
Your noncommittal remark receives Seungcheol's scathing glower. "Bet."
"It wouldn't be the first time," you shrug.
"There haven't been any notable disturbances and the ground's been stable. So hopefully their only goal is to simply antagonize us further."
Antagonize.
A funny word for such a twisted coin game between a hunter and the hunted. You can't and don't blame the younger Bernardelli agent — only you were privy to most of the true horrors Seokmin dealt with behind the scenes, Seungcheol a close second. And because of that, you were usually the one at his side before an encounter with Jihoon and the ever lingering threat and terror of said man's monstrous power.
But today, you get up from the table without so much as a glance in his direction. Only a parting command of "Let's regroup near the entrance at high noon," while Seungkwan and Mingyu exchange looks of minor distress.
The black-haired man in his hangover blues obnoxiously blows a raspberry as you leave.
Later, there are two solid knocks on the door as you get ready. You know who it is before the door swings open after your agreeable hum to enter. Many may be intimidated at the sight of the silver weapon in your gloved hands. Seungkwan and Mingyu make up half of the quartet who aren't.
They take a seat on the bed as you purse your lips at the reflection in the dusty mirror. Then you fuss with the strap for your gun. Satisfyingly re-securing it around your thigh before throwing a carmine trench coat over tight kevlar that covers almost every inch of skin possible.
"Surprised you didn't dye everything else black during a fit of rage."
Your lips curl upwards. "How on Gunsmoke would I manage that?"
"With the way you're acting, 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned…' or so the saying goes."
"Really, 'Kwan?"
"I'm an avid supporter of women's rights and especially their wrongs."
"Sure you are."
"You would absolutely look dashing!"
"Thanks, Mingyu. Should've given my color scheme a little more consideration."
"But then you wouldn't have achieved such an infamous moniker. I mean, okay. Maybe the black plague killed tons of Earthlings eons ago but it doesn't have the same ring as 'Sirocco, the bloody rain that follows after the humanoid typhoon'…"
Seungkwan allegedly graduated at the top of his class, leave it to him to spew out all kinds of random facts that you know nothing about. You huff and adjust the brim of the large hat atop your head.
"All that does is make me cringe."
"Uh-huh, so what's making him act like that?"
"Who's acting like what?"
"Fine, keep playing dumb. Did you reject Seokmin or something?"
Mingyu gasps. Dramatically. Hands on cheeks and mouth open in a wide 'o' shape, puppy-dog eyes glistening with despair.
"There's no way!"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Uh-huh."
"Besides, nothing happened so don't think you're gonna wheedle out of me whether you're going to win that stupid bet you two have going with Choi."
"Eh, don't worry. I've been out of the running for a while now, unfortunately."
"The hell did you even throw for?"
He shoots you a deadpan look. "Guess who's aged eighty years watching the two of you dance around each other like dumbasses? Could've sworn you'd be married with a toma farm or a dozen little children by now."
"It's your own damn fault for falling victim to that pastor's salacious schemes. And it's not even remotely like that, so…"
"Someone just doesn't wanna give in."
You stomp your foot, frustration boiling over. "Ugh, I'm never drinking again!"
"Wait… No fucking way…!"
"Literally shut up, Boo."
"I mean Choi did bet you'd confess and you know… get intimate afterwards… if you were drunk so…"
"Oh, so that's why he was so damn pushy last night."
"Dirty cheater."
"You expect anything less from someone like him?"
A sigh. "No."
It's a well-known fact that Seungcheol would rather stoke the flames of hell than ever needlessly dabble with holy water as one might be expected to with his chosen career.
"But judging by both of your moods, evidently nothing happened." The raven-haired man really has the gall to look disappointed that no one won yet pleased Seungcheol didn't, and the gall to point out the obvious. "Anyways, what did you bet on, Mingyu?"
"Don't recall!"
"Figures." Seungkwan's face falls flat against his palm with a groan before dragging it wearily down his face. "Whatever, it's not like it's that serious. Seriously," he adds on, feeling the burn of your perpetual glower. "Don't let it weigh on your mind. We need you fully focused."
"And when have I ever been less than what's expected of me?" You hold up a hand. "Wait! Don't answer. But really, worry more about that idiot."
"Aw, see? You still care!"
"… About that sixty billion bounty, Mingyu? Yeah."
"Sure you do."
"And truthfully, I was talking about Choi, 'Kwan."
"Well, both of them always get into those zany headspaces!"
You shrug at the tall man's truthfulness. "They're both holding a lot of trauma and baggage."
"And you aren't?" Seungkwan snorts with sarcasm dripping from the dig.
"At least mine's manageable. And… hasn't threatened your lives yet."
"As far as we know."
"In fact, I think I've saved your 'so-very-untraumatized' lives more often than not. Stay with me and you'll both be okay."
They good-naturedly give you individual looks of disdain. Perfectly in sync when you accompany that last statement with a devilish smirk and a twirl that flares out your tail coat with a flourish. By no means are they incapable. Clumsy Mingyu can adeptly wield his massive concussion gun when it counts, of course, and Seungkwan stealthily hides several derringer 'throwaway' pistols under his white cloak that he can fire with deadly precision.
Nonetheless, they loyally flank to your side when Tonim's bell tower signifies the hour of high noon has struck. Seungcheol meets the three of you outside the door of the saloon, smoking a cigarette and one arm lazily draped over the Punisher — a terrifying machine gun mockingly designed in the burdening shape of a merciful cross.
You spot Seokmin up ahead. He's standing on the low border wall near the town's entrance, perched next to a pillar for back support with the heel of his boot propped up behind him. Decked out in the usual galaxy ensemble, purple fabric cut off at shoulder-length of the top left sleeve to allow free range of movement for his prosthesis. His hair's slightly gelled up for a more intimidating and dramatic flair and it almost makes you giggle.
But there's that stern gaze focused on the horizon, likely able to see far out into the distance through those amber lenses the human eye can't quite decipher. Despite such a hardened resolve, his head tilts slightly up toward the blue sky with a faint smile on his lips — an honoring appreciation for the beauty and wonder of life despite its inevitable horrors.
Seungcheol clicks his tongue to get your attention while Seungkwan and Mingyu keep walking ahead. "Spiky Hair thinks he's really gonna do it?"
"Won't stop until he's tried every last resort."
"Even if it kills 'im?"
"Even if it kills him."
"This damned situation 'cause of ya know who."
"Dokyeom. DK."
"Nah, nah. There's the asinine version, eh?"
"Absolute pain in my ass?"
He slaps his knee. "Ah, aye… good one! But nah, 's really stupid one, Deathly, uh, er…?"
"… Deadly Knives?"
"Pfft, yeah, 's that one. So, we gotta try 'n stop one genocidal brother from sweepin' out the whole human race 'n tryna convince greedy humans not to keep exploitin' 'em with the other. Back 'n forth again 'n again. I swear…'s only ever gonna be impossible."
"What makes you think it can't happen?"
He looks at you like you're stupid. Maybe you are. But what does that make him? "Both sides — humans versus DK — think they're right 'n too proud to think otherwise."
"So you don't think they'll settle for a compromise. Or at least try to see the other's viewpoint?"
"Hell naw. Ain't no compromisin' when both think they're justified in what they're doin'."
"Well, regardless — you joined a good cause, Choi. World could use a little more peace and love, don't you think?"
He grunts. "Lookit who's corrupted yer ideologies. Don'tcha know what destroyed Earth?"
"And do you know what saved humans? Kindness. Hope. Empathy. Compassion. Change. Making and being the difference. The good kind."
A long time ago, maybe in a different twist of fate, you might've staunchly agreed with Seungcheol. But despite it all, you've been somewhat changed — or like the pastor said, call it a corruption of sorts — by Seokmin's unwavering sense of positivity and kindness no matter how bleak the future.
You admired him. Truly.
"Un-fuckin'-'lievable."
Seungcheol shakes his head as if he's not gearing up, ready and raring to go as he stomps forward to join a fellow 'brother-in-arms'. The thought inwardly makes you smile with affection until you remember you're actually, in fact, mad at Seokmin.
A dust cloud stirs up on the horizon, steadily growing closer to where you stand.
"You're so full of goddamn self-flagellation."
The individual where all your ire is centered on jolts, doing a double-take at your sudden but familiar presence by his side approaching. Or maybe it was the mere fact you were talking to him again. A warm expression overtakes his facial features at the sense of calm that automatically relaxes the tension in his muscles as he looks down at you.
"Well then, hello to you too. Feeling better, mayfly?"
"… Remind me to never drink again."
"I told you —"
"Yeah, yeah." You wave away his nagging and step up on the wall to stand next to him. "Don't worry, I won't be making a mistake like that again."
"… Mistake?"
There's an edge to his tone. Searching. Sometimes you hate how perceptive Seokmin can be. Though he actively acts oblivious and carefree, it's usually a ploy to lower other's guard.
You wonder how long he's known.
So, you sigh. "I'm talking about drinking, of course. And… I wish I could say I forgot even if… I haven't. But it's fine, I know where I stand."
The latter part of your sentence trails off. It's true though. You do know — thankful you can even be next to Seokmin. You might not be with him but at the very least, your place will always be somewhere by his side. Affectionate flings may be sought elsewhere. But they're always temporary. In your heart of hearts, you know you're irreplaceable to him.
And that's going to have to be good enough for you.
The man in question scratches the back of his head. "It's not… it's not like that. I know I fucked up."
"Stop." You grip at his prosthetic, knowing despite how sensitive the sensors are, they won't be able to pick up how you slightly tremble. "It's okay. Really."
Who is it you're trying to reassure?
"Mayfly," Seokmin murmurs. "Look at me."
With the slightest hesitation, your gaze finally rises from its focal point centered on his boots and the stones beneath to meet dark brown eyes. The ache in the gunslinger's chest eases just a little. It's been far too long — a day, in actuality — since he's got to lose himself among the vibrant hues of your irises and he squeezes your free hand in gratitude.
"It's not okay, I want to talk to you. Sober. But…"
"I get it. Now's not the time for a heart-to-heart, especially not in front of your brother's henchmen."
You laugh, for real this time. The sight is breathtaking; it makes Seokmin's eyes crinkle, a fond smile to accompany his affection as he leans in closer to you to whisper a sweet, "Thank you."
Three sets of eyes try to make it very not obvious that they're very obviously totally not watching the overdue interaction with bated breath.
"Oh golly good, they've made up!"
"'Course they would."
"It's about time, I couldn't take the tension anymore."
"Don'tcha think it'll get worse once they start canoodlin'?"
"Good lord," Seungkwan groans, "perish the thought."
"What's wrong with a little love? Yay for love!"
"Well, I don't think they've made it that far yet. But we're getting there. Baby steps."
It would be a good cause for celebration, a resumption of last night's festivities. Unfortunately, the merry moment is cut short with a screech of brakes, signaling the arrival of Jihoon, DK's most elite performer in his unmerry band of henchmen.
Next to the feared Crimsonnail's suitcase sits Soonyoung the Beast. Silver strands peek out behind the unsettling, bug-like circular mask hiding his face. He casually waves, acting like the unnerving discovery behind the innocent, abandoned child — who went by Hoshi — was simply a facade initially put on around your group and not such a grand revelation.
Having sorted that out in the stomach of a giant flying worm serving as a hive mind for Gunsmoke's legion of its original inhabitants and swearing not to let your guard down again, all five of you remain on high alert.
Jihoon's steel-colored eyes flicker to Seungcheol. "Hello there, Undertaker. Or… should I say Judas?"
"Howdy dandy to ya too, ya son of a bitch," the pastor snarls, spitting his cigarette in their direction. Cursing under his breath when the distance and uselessness of the fizzling stub doesn't blow up the engine like he wishes it would.
"Now, now. You don't want to make me mad, do you?"
"Kinda wanna piss ya off as much as ya piss me off, yeah."
"Surely you know what —"
"He means nothing by it." You'd quickly abandoned your post next to Seokmin to place a hand on Seungcheol's taut shoulder. Boldly facing the blonde man's haughty expression with one that's hopefully placating enough on behalf of your comrade. "He's just grumpy because he's still hungover."
"Well, well… if it isn't the humanoid typhoon's little blood shower."
Ugh, you inwardly grimace, why the fuck does everyone have such unflattering nicknames for me?
"Still following him around, I see."
"'S a lot comin' from —"
" — Hasn't gotten rid of me yet!"
"… Seems it," Jihoon sniffs and cocks his head. "Similar to the dilemma I have with this persistent bug."
Soonyoung chortles, neck contorting at an unnatural angle to peer at the driver. "You love me."
"You're delusional."
"Why are you here?"
Seokmin's question comes sharp and pointed like a dagger, a far cry from his usual demeanor. His tone remains detached. Aloof. Vaguely accusatory. Unlike your harried action to cover for Seungcheol, you don't dare divert attention away from the gunslinger who stalks forward after elegantly hopping down from his perch. Despite an outwardly calm demeanor, there's an underlying urgency in his gait that's threatening to snap.
"For amusement. A show, if you will."
"One that's not even orchestrated by Joshua's freakish cult powers!"
Out of all the males surrounding you, you're not sure exactly who growls at the Beast's mere mention of the devil-like figurehead — in fact, it could've been all of them — but there's one noise that rings out above the din of it all.
Click!
You don't need super-hearing to pick up that telltale sound. Not when every person over the age of eighteen in Tonim has a cocked gun trained on each member of your ragtag gang.
"Uh, so… how many times is this?"
"One too fuckin' many," you answer Seungkwan with a petulant hiss and reluctantly mimic him by putting your hands up in the air.
Jihoon cackles. "And when will you fools ever learn?"
"'S my question, actually," the pastor nonchalantly calls over his shoulder, directed at the town's ringleader. "Didn't know ya had it in ya, boy."
You didn't think Wonwoo had it in him either, to be honest. But that's not something you were going to mention aloud with the shaky hold the bespectacled man has on the firearm waveringly aimed at his target — the one whose head is worth a 60 billion double dollars bounty, dead or alive.
"Felnarl. Jeneora Rock. Descartes. Dankin."
There's a faint twitch in one of Seokmin's eyebrows. Seungcheol rolls his eyes, sarcastically muttering under his breath an addition of location names, "Voldoor, Inepril, December, Lewiston…" and Mingyu joins in on the fun with a cheerful, "New Miami!"
Seungkwan watches warily and your jaw clenches. You can feel your teeth grind together in annoyance as Wonwoo's smarmy sneer grows smugger.
"And now, Tonim Town. What?" he jeers, seizing the chance to use the man's silence as a way to ridicule him. "Don't recognize what you've laid waste to? Must I bring up the big ones to jog your memory a little, like the city of July and Augusta or the hole in the fifth moon?"
"Why you —"
Enragement propels you a step forward, but the barrel swinging your way halts your next move mid-step. The sullen look on Wonwoo's face surprisingly holds no malice. He looks saddened, if anything, but you can't bring yourself to feel too much sympathy with the rifle he's now pointed toward you.
"You forgot one."
"Pardon?"
Seokmin's voice is hardly more than a whisper yet it rings out loud and clear amid the tense silence and stillness. "I said, you forgot one. There's not a name of any place or person I'd ever forget. I'm well aware of the ones you're talking about… and more. However, there's somewhere I won't ever forget that no one will ever know existed."
"… Huh?"
"Little Ivywood."
Wonwoo seems so taken aback and the pause unwittingly allows your eyes to drift over to meet Seokmin's brown ones. There are so many emotions conveyed in the sidelong glance — a mixture of regret-filled feelings yet ever so soft — and it lasts a second too long to snap the befuddled aggressor out of his reverie.
"Oh… I see." He pushes up his glasses, the lenses glinting in the pale sunlight like a typical anime villain. The long gun lowers to the ground the same time as he throws back his head to let out a bitter laugh. "So that's how it is! All you do is take and take and take, Lee. Destroy, destroy, destroy; again and again and again!"
"Aye, ole chap's gone off his rocker."
"You've made an ally out of a would-be, should-be enemy and think other victims with their pain and grief don't exist?!"
"Wow," Seungkwan wrinkles his nose in disgust, "yeah… he's gone completely insane."
Mingyu hums in agreement. "A little unhinged! Off the rocks! Unstable even! When can I knock him out?"
You'd love to give the gentle giant the go-ahead. Really. But even so…
"Damn you —"
"Stop it."
The townspeople's uncertainty and hesitance tells you all you need to know, especially when Wonwoo's hysteria leaves them even more perplexed. After years of handling a gun like a second arm, you can spot inexperience and fear of handling a dangerous weapon the second someone is near one. You lower your arms and step forward once more, confidence growing when he makes no move to threaten you further.
"You don't want this."
The corner of his mouth quirks upward, a rueful smile. "You know, I thought we really did share some camaraderie."
"We do."
"Yet you gallivant around with a monster like that?"
"He's not a monster."
"I should've known better, really, when the VERnons said you're the sirocco that follows after the humanoid typhoon. Heroes, my ass! I don't get it, how could you do that to others after what happened to you?"
To us?
It remains unspoken yet you can hear the intent of the accusingly barbed question. Two survivors of a wrecked hometown. Shared camaraderie hadn't been a lie. Even now as you meet the flickering fire in Wonwoo's eyes with a blazing flame in your own, all you can see is a reflection of your past and what you could've turned into in a possible future.
A cold gleam returns to his gaze as he takes your silence as defiance. Or maybe even shamelessness. "How could you turn a blind eye to such a bloody warpath of destruction when you know too well of the tragedy that's left behind?!"
"Isn't that what you're doing?"
"… Excuse me?"
"That's what all of you are doing right now," you declare loudly and some of Tonim's residents whose conscience stings have the decency to avert their eyes. Awareness of their actions seem to weigh down on them, guns lowering ever the slightest and the awkwardness encourages Seungkwan to speak up.
"We would've left peacefully tomorrow."
"But yer actions're gonna be the very cause of the destruction yer tryin' so damn hard to prevent."
"Because you took a bribe!"
There's a stilted, horrified, and collective gasp, so you try to remedy Mingyu's exclamation.
"It's because you let your malice sway you. Tell me, Jeon. What all did you lose?"
"My whole town. Then my parents. Almost my life and nearly Lina's too. My lover…"
"And your sense of self. Plus, the new life you've created here — and those things? Almost lost because of your own accord. Why would you destroy the few good things you're granted?"
Wonwoo's eyebrows scrunch as his face tenses. Your heart goes out to him despite everything, hoping to get your point across as you continue speaking.
"That doesn't negate the losses. The grief. The pain. It never goes away but… you can choose to clean out the wound, put some salve on it, and bandage it or let it fester and infect your body 'til it rots even your soul."
You can hear the shift in the sand as Seokmin approaches to stand next to you. He regards Wonwoo with a kind smile and the understanding, crescent-shaped squint of his eyes is like a punch to the other man's gut.
"…. I —"
" — It's your choice, Jeon. What did they offer you? Money? There are so many bets on July's militia lying about the payout. I mean, c'mon, there's no way a ruined city would have the funds."
"Yer Plant's no longer in red status, so ya won't need to barter no more."
"I'll throw in a better deal — let us go and I'll have Choi marry you and Sherry, free of charge."
His cheeks flush and you inwardly gloat, instincts right on the money. Seungcheol's jaw drops, absolutely flabbergasted, and the townsfolk exchange a few knowing snickers.
"If it's protection you need, we can figure that out too," Seokmin recovers and offers in a low voice. "And if Do — er, Knives — or his gang approached you with a deal, just know that they never hold up their end of the bargain."
"You're lucky you threatened us first. DK's side is a little too slash-happy and trigger-loving to resort to verbal methods. They're the ones you'd want to go after anyways, you see, this man and Knives are twins if you don't look close enough, they're eerily similar at the strangest moments. So the real story is that it's all just spiraled out of control."
"You mean…"
"I won't deny responsibility." Seokmin admits sternly. "It's true that I've wreaked devastation to many towns. Failed to save the people I swore to protect."
"But DK keeps forcing his hand to get Seok to join his genocidal cause. And every time he refuses to do so, his brother throws a tantrum and well, knives go flying everywhere. Literally."
"He's a little…" The gunslinger searches for the right word — and finding that there is none — cringes. "Dramatic."
You stare at him, aghast. "He cut your arm off!"
Wonwoo pales, swallows, and then grimaces, daring to ask, "So… I've had it wrong the whole time?"
"I guess not entirely." You shrug, also guilty as charged years ago. "And obviously not the first."
"And certainly not the last," Seungkwan pipes up.
The bespectacled man looks down at the ground. "I don't… I don't know… Do I even deserve this kind of treatment? This… mercy?"
"No."
With such a blunt answer, Seokmin's quick to protest with an admonishment of your name while Seungkwan and Mingyu suppress smiles at your straightforwardness. Seungcheol freely chuckles, lighting a cigarette.
And Wonwoo's face falls as remorse hits all over again.
"But," you smirk, "what have I told you?"
"Oh, ah… why destroy the few good things life grants me?"
"Good. You were listening. We might get along just fine, after all." You send him a teasing wink. "Camaraderie and all that be damned."
A sheepish look overtakes the man's previously hardened features. And suddenly he's laughing with his head thrown back like earlier, but this time it's with an unrestrained amount of joy. Relief. Hope.
"The ticket to the future is always blank, Wonwoo." Seokmin extends a hand and the other man takes it, the small grin on his face turning into a full-blown smile.
"Guns down, Tonim town. The rest of you, come on out! Let's celebrate!" He calls out to everyone, gesturing for your group to follow. "Drinks are on me to make up for this whole mess. I'm sorry for getting you all involved."
You turn around toward Seokmin, elation written all over your face that he readily mirrors. Just as you're about to grab his hand as he reaches out at the same time, there's a slow, loud handclap that sets off mental warning sirens blaring all over again.
"Conflict resolution. How very touching."
The velvety voice is deceivingly sweet. But beneath the dulcet tones lies a raw and wicked strength. It rings out clearly, even more so when the jubilant mood abruptly dies down as a new figure approaches.
"Aw, c'mon Joshie! Just when it was gettin' good!" Soonyoung whines and you belatedly realize you forgot all about the real enemies at the entrance gate, thinking they had grown bored and left.
"What about that was 'getting good'?"
The Beast huffs at Jihoon's surly attitude, more than likely pouting beneath his mask. "Was really lookin' forward to those free drinks…"
"We don't need drinks and we don't need you, Josh."
If there's one commonality between the adversary and your group, it's the shared disdain for the elegant-looking man dressed in all black fabrics with shiny leather buckles, and slicked-back locks to match.
"Hm. But I think you do."
Chilling ochre-colored eyes couldn't be bothered to look at you, drifting past you and Seokmin like you were nothing more than the grains of sand littering every surface on Gunsmoke. And like a marionette, your head automatically swivels to follow his line of sight, blood draining from your face when you realize what he's looking at.
Lina.
She breaks away from holding onto Sheryl's hand after they emerge from the saloon, bounding toward her brother with excitement all over her face. The arm that isn't supporting his firearm extends gallantly outward, ready to welcome her with a hug as he strolls to meet her halfway.
They're smiling at one another with so much adoration after the intensity from earlier. If you weren't fucking terrified, you'd wish Dokyeom was also there to see how pure a sibling relationship and affection should be.
Instead, your stomach lurches, and Seokmin hisses beside you. With your back turned, you can't see Joshua but you're sure he's smirking when Wonwoo's frame stiffens, body jerking as it moves beyond his control.
Hastily, he's cocking the rifle with expert ease and assuming the perfect position to fire it, something he previously displayed no knowledge on before. Wide eyes have no choice but to peer down the scope and he chokes at how it's unforgivingly aimed directly at his little sister.
She skids to a halt, ten paces away. Hesitant. Wary. Puzzled.
"… Wonu?"
It all plays out in slow motion as you reach for Sirocco, simultaneously screaming out to your friends to alert them and provide cover. Frantic panic swirls in the air like a sandstorm at the turn of events, but even more fear generates when the townspeople can do nothing but helplessly succumb to their limbs moving on their own too.
Despite every single effort and all of his muscles straining not to do it, Wonwoo's pointer finger on the trigger pulls back. It doesn't matter how much he struggles to fight for control, his body refuses to listen. Tears flow from his eyes even though he can't speak, can't yell, can't beg for forgiveness — the vehement sense of horror is the only thing able to overpower Joshua's terrifying control, leaking out a salty excess.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Three gunshots ring out at the same time. You fire right before Wonwoo does and Seokmin follows two seconds later. Not because his reaction time is slower. But because he could see and calculate where the bullet's headed after you changed its trajectory by shooting at Wonwoo's barrel.
It doesn't end there.
Seokmin is a half-step closer to Lina and can move at an inhumane speed, diving into a tuck-and-roll to reach her moments before the residents have no choice but to open fire too.
You know he's fast enough to dodge bullets at close range, but the staggered distance spread out among all of those present in the town's square works little for that insane advantage. Instead, the skilled combatant focuses all his attention on shielding Lina beneath the loose flaps of his impenetrable trench coat. She clings tightly to his leg, whimpering.
"Don't worry, I'll protect you."
Continuing to mutter reassurances, he pats her fluffy brown hair with an unshaking cybernetic palm while the other rapidly points his revolver upwards to deflect a bullet that might've been lucky enough to shatter the bridge of his glasses. Then doing the same to one at five o'clock on his right. He angles his body this way and that as if a puppeteer is yanking the strings connected to his limbs to the perverse beat of an unheard tune. The few he misses land harmlessly against the thick kevlar material you're all wearing.
Meanwhile, your steady hand supports the familiar weight of Sirocco. Muscle memory aids you with cocking the gun as you run. Aiming at the closest group of people near them and then — bang!, bang!, bang! — snipe off the barrels on their guns in rapid succession, rendering them useless.
From behind, something flies past your face and nicks the top of your ear — one of the few places unprotected by bulletproof material — causing you to hiss. Scowling over your shoulder, you squint in the direction it came from.
While a complete bastard, Seungcheol is also the most resourceful ray of hope in a shootout like this. The Punisher's automatic artillery relentlessly fires shot after shot, destroying old and weather-beaten guns like they're empty, crushable soda cans. It's faster too. The trigger-happy pastor twirls it around maniacally, taking only the slightest care to not actually kill anyone.
You're a hundred percent sure it's because of Joshua's disturbing power that allows him to reanimate corpses rather than Seokmin's "Thou shalt not kill" lecture and pacifist philosophies that keeps the supposed 'god-fearing' man from snuffing out anyone's life this time around. Despite the bullets whizzing around, you know he'll fare alright with that healing serum of his — just as long as he doesn't overdose on it.
Mingyu rushes over to stand back-to-back with the pastor, x-shaped claws firing out of his 'stun-gun' and immobilizing many of his targets with ease. You can't help but grimace though, wondering if they'll sustain more brain damage from Joshua's nefarious telepathy or a well-meaning concussion that leaves them unconscious and no longer posing a threat. A solid steel object flies past the brown-haired man's head, knocking down the mind-controlled person who was trying to sneak up on him using a blind spot.
"Ooh, thanks, Seungkwan!"
"Pay attention, you blockhead!"
An empty derringer lays at said blockhead's feet and Mingyu kicks it away with a childlike glee. A brand-new loaded pistol is already in Seungkwan's right hand even as he throws away the one in his left toward someone approaching Seungcheol. The young man's never empty-handed for long because with another flashy twirl from out of his cloak and a new handgun is cocked, aimed, and fired.
Despite the distance and conditions, all three work together like clockwork. Different shaped and sized cogs all interconnected to succeed without causing too much harm. And you know you must play your part as well, turning your attention back to the few townsfolk that remain.
"Seokmin, switch!"
It's not like he needs the heads-up. The way you'd both been inching closer to each other every time your gun's fired already issued the forewarning. It's like a subtle tango performed by two fierce allies surrounded by deadly enemies. If you didn't know better, it's similar to an intricate sword dance.
But you knew how dangerous it was to play with knives.
The swift transfer of Lina's warm little body into your arms is a welcome comfort. Seokmin sends you a dazzling smile, one full of confidence at a successful swap.
"Hey there, pretty girl," you coo and your gloved thumb wipes away one of the tear trails cutting through the dirt smudges on her face. "You are so, so, so brave and I'm so, so, so proud of you."
"He," she sniffles, "my… my… br-brother. W-Wonu!"
Pressing a kiss to her forehead, you turn her to face the other way. "Everything's going to fine. I promise. Now, run to Seungcheol. He'll keep you safe while the rest of us finish this."
Seungkwan and Mingyu had effectively disarmed everyone on their end and now worked on dragging the town's unconscious residents inside the saloon and attending to any wounds. The pastor stood guard near the entrance with his Punisher staked firmly into the sandy ground. Although empty of ammunition, the machine gun still served a purpose as a great defender with its imposing cross shape.
With the target assuredly safe — out of sight, out of mind — the control Joshua has over those remaining falters and starts to lose its effect. In the brief lull, Seokmin dashes ahead to deliver a flying kick that helpfully unsheathes the dagger hidden in the sole of his boots, demolishing one more firearm in someone's grip before it can be used again.
Bang!
Bang!
And with Sirocco's precision, the last two are destroyed as well. You match your comrade's grin and turn triumphantly to where the instigators still stand at the entrance.
There would be no casualties today. You and your comrades would make sure of that.
Joshua, stoic as ever, surveys the aftermath with an air of unbothered gracefulness. Jihoon fumes next to him. Panic spikes when Soonyoung can't be spotted at first until you spy him curled up in the car's front seat — asleep.
You fist bump Seokmin in high spirits. Then fearlessly meet a pair of deep orange eyes devoid of any emotion or warmth, a shift occurs in your smile. Confidence and satisfaction hone the corners of your mouth into a daring smirk and something about the bold taunt causes a rare flicker of humor to cross Joshua's lips. Whether it's scornful pity or simple mockery, you don't have time to figure it out because Jihoon snaps.
Nails.
Several of them fly through the air and their wielder's formidable namesake comes from the daunting color that makes the multitude of piercers look like thin streaks of blood against the pale blue sky. The spikes as long as spears are all fired from Jihoon's large suitcase-turned-crossbow that aims just shy of your left side.
Those steel eyes of his are as sharp as their color. The malice within them feels suffocating, so strong and heavy that it sucks all the breath straight out of your lungs. Only the pain from a nail grazing your cheek is enough to pull your attention away from drowning in the unnerving emotion and you put a hand up to the laceration to soothe the sting.
Wetness oozes from your skin, an unsettling feeling of sliminess accompanying the touch. Puzzled, your fingers retract and you ponder the sheer amount of red viscoelastic fluid coating them. There's so much of it pooling that droplets fall to the sand below while others dribble down past your wrist and under your sleeve, the stain blending right in with the fabric of your coat.
Drip.
"It's all your fault!"
Drip.
"Their blood is on your hands…"
Drip.
"Don't you feel guilty?"
Drip.
"Don't you feel responsible?"
Drip.
"Do you regret being the only one left to live?"
Drip.
Faces you know and voices you cannot recall overlap and echo. Unfamiliar frowning expressions and intonations you remember as once gentle now ridicule, belittle, and find every crack in your well-made armor. Insidious whispers weave inside, entangling themselves within the fragile support structures of your mind and very soul. They point and cackle to one another at such a sorry sight, only for you to realize you're angrily jabbing a pointer finger at your worthless reflection with those cursory words coming straight out of your own mouth.
Drip.
Your head turns robotically, like an early prototype of the lost technology Earthlings created. This time it's Sheryl who's the victim, helplessly well within the trajectory line of Jihoon's rage. Every muscle aches, weighed down by exhaustion. Your shoulder burns. Yet you still somehow find the strength within you to rush toward her, especially hearing Lina's desperate wail as she's held back by a grimacing Seungcheol.
Drip.
Like a comet, Seokmin blazes past. He skids to a stop, effectively shielding the woman right before impact. You're too slow to move. In fact, it feels like an out-of-body experience. As if you're nothing but a hologram inside the floating ship — an artificial intelligence projection with no other choice but to witness the horrors and observe tangible objects scuttle towards their inevitable doom without interference. You're left with no choice but to simply watch as the nails are propelled through the air with the intent to strike.
Drip.
Someone's screaming. Maybe it's you.
Drip.
The nails impale Seokmin without mercy. Strike after strike, they pierce straight through the material of his coat designed to repel only bullets and plunge deep within the muscles beneath his skin. One after the other. So many of them stick out of the man's backside like the skeletal bone formation for wings. He slumps to his knees, falling on top of a bewildered but unharmed Sheryl. When he only lays still with no further action, you're struck with the dreadful knowledge that he may never move again and it fills you with an unfathomable maelstrom of raw grief and anger.
Drip.
Suddenly, you're no longer drowning in invisible quicksand and can move freely again. There's zero hesitation in your now fluid movements — not even when the blond-haired man poises his crossbow directly at you this time. Pulling out the spare gun hidden near your hip, you blast the airborne spikes flying towards you without hesitation.
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
Bang!
More fall than you shoot. The anger, pain, and grief you wield is enough to tear them apart like they're nothing but worm larvae helplessly caught in a sandstorm. You stalk forward through the crimson ire that relentlessly strikes down, clearing a path that's littered with broken, twisted, and dented nails before resolutely aiming point-blank at Jihoon's forehead.
Click.
More people are screaming and the spiteful cacophony in your mind resumes. But your ears feel like they're filled with cotton and this time you're stuck underwater. Your chest rises and falls, trying and failing to collect yourself.
"… out of it!"
"Hyperventialing -"
"Goddamn it! Get ahold o'yerself, woman!"
The Crimsonnail sneers.
Your cheek stings.
The dissonance reminds you of the wound from before. But this time it feels like a sting, as if someone slapped you — albeit rather gently. Numb, you halt in place and cautiously raise your hand back to your surprisingly unmarred face. But rather than skin, you grasp onto something solid. Something familiar. Something kind. Something loving. Something safe. Something warm. Something that's yours — always has been and always will be.
Someone.
And then… you open your eyes — and find yourself staring directly into Seokmin's sparkling brown ones.
"Y-you're dead," you manage to choke out in disbelief and his eyes incredulously crinkle into half-moons at the statement to hide the tears brimming in them.
The soothing hand caressing your cheek moves to wrap around the barrel of the gun you're pressing to his forehead and he smiles disarmingly. As if what you just said was the funniest thing ever.
"I know, mayfly."
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Part 2 | Read the whole thing on AO3
onlyseokmins: April 2024 ©
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itjazzbicch · 7 months
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Safe Haven
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Pairing: Tomas “Smoke” Vrbada x Reader
First time writing for Smoke so I hope I did well!
Summary: Originally brought into the Lin Kuei as the reader was arranged to marry Bi-Han, they learn that he is not the man they thought him to be and when he goes off the deep end, the reader seeks help from someone in the Lin Kuei that they have true feelings for…
Warnings: Arranged marriage situation, MK1 Spoilers obvi, reader has a break down
Word Count: 0.7k
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Being arranged to marry Bi-Han of the Lin Kuei, I thought this new chapter of my life would be the beginning of many good ones.
That turned out to be far from what I expected. Bi-Han wasn’t exactly the lover that I was looking for.
Although he became grandmaster and I was soon to be his spouse, he had business to handle with Lord Lui Kang and I had no knowledge of what exactly was going on.
Not till Bi-Han returned, claiming his brothers Kuai Liang and Tomas were no longer a part of the Lin Kuei, and that he’d no longer be working with Lord Lui Kang.
Any question I had, he didn’t answer, told me that it was none of my concern.
Bi-Han wasn’t exactly the man I dreamed of being with my entire life. I already doubts in the past and this was my breaking point.
He must’ve forgotten that I was a highly skilled martial artist like himself. One night when he finally rested, I snuck out, needing to find Tomas.
I learned that he and Kuai were making their own clan, the Shirai Ryu, and looking to take down Bi-Han and restore the Lin Kuei.
There was so much I needed to get off my chest and I knew I could do so with Tomas. Out of their entire clan, I bonded with him the most and I knew that he’d help me.
It didn’t take me long to reach the Shirai Ryu’s minka, stumbling upon a beautiful garden full of red trees, lit in the night by lanterns.
“Y/N?” Tomas’s voice alone had me ready to burst into tears, running to him, “What are you doing here? How did you find this place?”
“I’ve been following you, but it’s not what you think,” I said quickly, fighting tears and running out of breath, “I can’t stand Bi-Han anymore. I can’t take it. I don’t want to marry him. I don’t want to be in his Lin Kuei anymore.”
“Y/N, breathe. Try to calm down,” Holding my shoulders, trying his best to comfort me, “Are you-“
I already knew what he was going to ask and cut him off with tears flowing down my face:
“I’m positive and mean every word I say, Tomas. You don’t know him like I do and just how terrible he is. I don’t want to go back. Please-“
“Shh, it’s okay,” He whispered, pulling me into a warm hug, “I believe you.”
His hug was everything I needed and more, my tears slowed and after some deep breaths, I didn’t feel so weak and brittle anymore, answering his question from before:
“I have been doing work of my own while Bi-Han has been gone. That’s how I found this place. So I could come talk to you.”
“Showing off your skill I see,” He smiled while rubbing my back, trying to raise my spirit, holding up my head some to connect a gaze, growing serious again as he asked, “I know you’re upset and dealing with a lot right now, but everything you said, you’re sure that you mean it?”
“Tomas,” I breathed in deeply, failing at fighting my tears as I confessed, “He’s never loved me. The only thing that kept me there was you, b-because, I love you.”
I didn’t realize at first how big his pupils expanded, my heart pouring and continuing to confess:
“You’re the one who always made sure that I was okay, spent time with me, made me feel special, instead of treating me like some object. I’m sorry I waited till now to tell you. I was just so scared of Bi-Han and now he’s completely lost it and I didn’t know who else to go to.”
“It’s okay,” He breathed, thinking and pulling back into his hug, his whisper making me cry silently, “Im so glad that you came to me.”
The tears wouldn’t stop coming, shaking as a chilled wind blew past us in the garden, but those shakes coming to halt as his embrace grew a bit tighter and warmer, his voice helping me ease down:
“You don’t have to worry about Bi-Han anymore. You never have to go back. Never.”
“I don’t know what I’d do with you,” I whispered, looking up from his shoulder as he whispered back:
“Don’t trouble yourself thinking about it. I love you too much to let you go back to that monster of a man.”
2023 © itjazzbicch — do not repost or translate my work. Likes, reblogs, and comments are always welcome
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hadesrise · 9 months
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𝐒𝐈𝐍 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐓.
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𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞. you are committed to the lord, but that doesn’t stop you from worshipping miguel.
𝖕𝖆𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘. miguel o’hara x priest!male reader
𝖜𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘. nsfw content, foul language, top!reader, bottom!miguel, sacrilege, unprotected sex, possessiveness, choking, praise kink, dacryphilia, sex in a holy place, slight degradation, miguel calls reader “father” the entire time, priest smoking a cigarette, riding, pet names, spitting (just once), shotgunning, masturbation with audience (reader watching), unhealthy romance, false belief, reader might be a little morally grey
𝖆𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗'𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖊. slutty outfit of miggy <3 this could possibly be a dark content because of the obsessive love (i may or may not have written reader as yandere). again, please correct my spanish if it’s incorrect and i’ll edit it immediately.
MINORS, FEM ALIGNED DNI !!
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You’ve devoted your entire life to the Lord. Made a vow, an oath to keep your soul pure for him as you lead a sacred ceremony everyday. You’ve cleansed your spirit to fit the holy standards necessary to be a priest and your dedication to the church earned you respect and love from the people. You were holy, not an ounce of filth littering your heart or soul, having long repented your sins.
The people whispered joyously amongst each other how good you were. How kind, generous, loving, forgiving and accepting. Your warm presence provides comfort to everyone who visit the church, washing away their worry and doubt and sins. You were perfect, they talk among themselves. There’s no way a priest like you could do anything wrong — you’re the people’s hope, their light, the one who reminds them of their purpose. They would never think such thing, you have an utmost respect for the Lord! You’re nothing but a great person.
Miguel hears them say, all the time. But they don’t know.
They don’t know the way you look at him, the way you devour him with your gaze whenever he wears something too fit for his large toned body. How you always mutter “Oh forgive me, Lord” under your breath everytime you take in the outline of his pecks on his clothes, how your eyes darken and pupils dilate when looking at his slutty slim waist, how you stifle a groan when he accidentally enclose your fingers in his mouth while accepting hostia. They don’t know the filthiness of your mind and the temptation you were trying so hard to fight. However, Miguel knows. Of course, he knows, how could he not when you’re staring at him with that predatory look in your eyes, like you would bend him over and pound him right there in front of the altars? And oh, how filthy and fucked-up it was that he gets hard by the thought.
But it’s inevitable, Miguel convinces himself. You’re known for having absolutely no desire for anything at all — so to find out you’re yearning for him? It feels good. Feels so fucking good, because he’s the only one who made you feel that way. He liked the attention, even if it was subtle and nearly nonexistent. You only ever paid proper attention to him in ceremonies or in the confessional, but those lingering lustful gazes you give him when you thought he wasn’t looking made Miguel’s hole clench around nothing.
Miguel doesn’t know what he was thinking when he wore such a slutty outfit underneath his coat to a church, where you usually walked around after a ceremony to check for forgotten belongings or just admire the artwork littered around the ceiling. Maybe, to make you give in to your desires. To find out if you would break your vow for him. He feels filthy to be so desperate for a priest, it’s unforgivable for fuck’s sake, and yet he can’t stop. The unbearable desire was stronger.
He knows your schedule like the back of his hands, what you do at night after the ceremonies are over for the day. You were a divine man as viewed by the public, but Miguel knew your perfect façade peels off the moment those church doors close shut; he was met with a satisfying triumph when his point was proven after entering the sacred place, his eyes falling on your figure sitting on the pew chairs right near the entrance with a cigarette between your fingers. Arm resting on top of the backrest, head tilted back to slowly blow out a particularly large smoke. Miguel feels his clothes get tight around him at the sight. It’s arousing to see the usually collected and well-mannered priest be so loose and careless.
You watch him in the corner of your eye as he sits beside you and mumbles a small greeting. You don’t respond, however, and Miguel wonders why until he sees your eyes trail all over his body very slowly with that lustful look that makes him shiver, a tad bit of annoyance shining within your irises. It didn’t look like you were annoyed with his presence at a time so late like this, but rather with the coat he was wearing that nearly covered his entire body. You bring the cigarette to your lips, inhaling another smoke. “What brings you here, Mr. O’Hara?” The smoke coming out as you speak.
Miguel’s breath hitched; fuck, that’s hot.
He’s unable to meet your gaze when he could feel it piercing through him, the arousal pooling on his stomach and crotch. “I- uh... I missed your ceremony this morning.”
You hum mindlessly, like you didn’t really care despite asking first about it. “So did you think showing up would make up for it?” The question comes off rude and informal, but unlike usual, you don’t pay mind. It honestly doesn’t matter if he missed the ceremonies, the faith wouldn’t thin just because he was unable to attend, but you knew he was coming for other reasons. You have no plans to fulfill your desire despite the fact it’s already devouring you everytime you lay eyes on the man — admitting to yourself that you were crazy over Miguel while not turning yourself away completely from the sacred vows.
It’s a game of who gives in first and seduces the other. The church being the only witness to your silent agreement with one another.
“Yes...” Miguel whispers before he finally meets your eyes with reluctant determination, “Yes, I did think showing up would make up for it. Especially while wearing something like this.” He slowly unbuttons his coat and let it fall over his shoulders, your dark eyes widening at the sleeveless top that hugged his torso perfectly and showed outlines of his pecks and abs. Your pants tighten as your dick gets hard in an instant. Miguel suddenly gets shy under the strong burning stare you were giving him and almost rewears his coat with redness decorating his cheeks, which you quickly stopped by gripping his wrist and slamming him back against the backrest.
Miguel’s breath catches in his throat when he processed you had stood upfront to tower over him, one knee on the seat in between his legs. “Finish what you started, O’Hara.” The low and sultry tone in your voice made him shiver in excitement and thrill, surprisingly listening to your wish and letting the coat slip off. You groaned when you caught sight of his muscular arms being hugged by the long gloves that stopped right before his armpits.
Oh dear God, he looked thoroughly fuckable, like he was begging to be ruined here right in front of the Lord’s altar.
“Fuck...” You sigh heavily, breath hot. Miguel reacts almost immediately at the sound as his body grew tense for a split second before relaxing when your hands gently wrapped around his wrists, cigarette thrown on the polished floor. You trace the fabric up his arms, then ghosted your touch over his exposed skin, the atmosphere growing hot while goosebumps appear. Miguel feels overwhelmed under your hungry gaze, thighs squeezed together, feeling his hole clench around nothing. Your hands slide up his shoulders and one stayed there, rubbing circles, as the other moves up almost teasingly slow to his neck. His breath hitches at the contact, a low moan escaping when your fingers enclosed around his throat.
He was surprisingly putty in your hands, not pushing you off or avoiding your touches. Perhaps, it’s because he knows you will go back to restraining yourself if he stops you, could even discourage you to do anything anymore — your faith has always been impressive as it allowed you to keep the lustful and sinful thoughts at bay. However, the faith never once stopped you from breaking the vow on different occasions, like smoking, drinking, or even flirting with faithful worshippers. He can’t miss the opportunity to have you all over him.
A gentle squeeze to his throat causes his mouth to fall open slightly, cloudy eyes meeting your strong ones that burned in desire. “Open, my dear. Let me.” Miguel does as he’s told, opening his mouth. Pleased with the lack of resistance, you shift your hand to hold his chin instead and gathered enough saliva in your mouth before spitting in his, watching as he squirmed slightly, the filthiness of your action going straight to his needy cock. You smirk when he swallows your spit almost greedily.
Miguel gasped when your knee starts rubbing his dick through his pants, falling forward and clinging onto your leg as his body twitch in pleasure. You click your tongue disapprovingly and slip your fingers through his hair before yanking it, a groan erupting from the man at the roughness. “You come to a church dressed and act like a filthy slut, always tempting me to fuck you in front of God’s temple. You’ve been hoping, haven’t you? For me to fuck the ever living shit out of this cunt?” You rubbed harder, your words making Miguel choke out a moan.
“Y-yes, father,” He gasps between grunts and moans. “I’ve been so desperate. Forgive me, father, please.”
Sweet Mother of God.
How this man manage to make you breathless even while being submissive is quite outstanding. You devoted your whole life to the Lord, thoroughly committed and faithful despite breaking few of your vows in privacy — the only vow haven’t being broken is having sex which is considered a filthy sin in priesthood, although you have technically broken it due to the amount of times you’ve fucked Miguel dumb in the depths of your imagination. It is unforgivable for a priest to be like this, will even be banished from the city if caught, reputation forever tarnished and have no choice but to live in shame.
But Jesus Christ, Miguel was such an irresistible temptation. Like the devil that whispered in Eve’s ear to take the holy apple in the Garden of Eden, he tempted you with that whore-ish body of his that practically begs to be bent over and wrecked. Your vows shattered to the ground and holiness replaced by despicable lust. The thread of self-control being sliced open as the scale of good and evil heavily swung in your head.
You were not good despite what people think. Often indulging yourself in the fantasy to possess Miguel and make him yours, your soul was as corrupted as the soul of sinners even with the faith to God still existing. The reputation as a good priest never settled comfortably within, sometimes would even make you roll your eyes at it while slowly killing your lungs with the cancer stick, hidden behind the thick doors of the sacred temple. You had no resistance to the sinful desires; as twisted as it sounds, you’ve embraced them with open arms and accepted them to just be human nature.
The punishment will be severe if caught, but our dearest Father, it wouldn’t hurt to receive your reward for being such a devoted priest, right?
You glance at the altar where you usually stood to hold sacred ceremonies, the long table and your chair catching your eyes as an idea formed. A sadistic grin spreading across your lips, Miguel yelps when you suddenly hoist him up from the pew chairs and wraps his legs around your torso, heart fluttering at the way you didn’t even struggle to lift him up despite his large size. The showcase of your sheer strength made him nearly whimper as he buried his face on your shoulder, not noticing how you were walking towards where the presence of God is most apparent.
He feels himself being sat on a hard wood and pulls away, freezing up when the sight of the biggest crucifix meet his vision. You sat down on the chair like a throne in between his spread legs, smiling devilishly at the look of horror on his face as you bring up another cigarette to your lips. “What’s the matter, sweet thing? You don’t look so thrilled,” Your teasing tone nearly mocking.
“F-father, I can’t—” His cheeks heat up as shame suddenly settled on his expression, knowing he was here in front of your God drenched in lust and impossibly filthy, his legs threatening to close and rub together at the thought of getting fucked here.
“You can and you will,” You cut him off and exhale a smoke. “You’ve been screaming my name in the comforts of your sheets and praying to him for me to break you, Miguel, and I’m finally giving you what you want.” Oh, Miguel felt himself weaken at the cruel look on your face. “Why don’t you show our Lord some gratitude and fuck yourself here?”
He knew he couldn’t resist. Not when you’re being good to him, willing to answer his prayers from the sleepless nights. With a shaky breath, Miguel unbuckles his belt and unzips his trousers, face red from embarrassment as he slips it off, leaking cock bouncing on his abdomen. Your eyes pierce into his soul, he feels so fucking dirty like this, presenting himself so willingly to you.
“Spread your legs more,” You nudged his leg with your foot, “Can’t see your pretty cunt properly from here, sweetheart.”
Miguel whines quietly and oh, what a holy sound it was. It almost makes you have mercy on him and spare him another embarrassment. Almost.
He bit his lip and shut his eyes close, bending his knees and raising his spread legs to the table until the heels of his feet touches the surface. You lick your lips at the bare sight of his quivering hole, dick twitching in your pants. Miguel slowly opens his eyes and sees you breathe heavily while palming your still clothed cock, smoke leaving your lips from the cigarette. For a moment, Miguel imagines what it would feel like to be shotgunned by you before bringing his fingers to his mouth and sucking lusciously on them as he stares at you, making you groan. He didn’t bother taking off the long gloves seeing its effect on you.
Not wanting to waste more time, Miguel reached down and shoved a wet finger in his hole without hesitation, moaning loudly. He adds another and starts fastening his pace, curling and scissoring himself to stretch his tight wet walls as he whimpers at the pleasure. It feels so filthy masturbating in front of you and the sacred altar, but the thrill only added to his arousal and excitement; your gaze not moving from him encourages him to fuck himself harder.
Fuck, Miguel looks so pretty like this. Previous shame and embarrassment long gone from his face as all he could focus on was making himself feel good, the filthy act serving as display of sins yet you perceived it differently — what Miguel’s doing was an act of devotion, to submit to your will in front of God while making himself the sacred offering. He looks divine being lost in pleasure, his moans like angels singing harmonies from Heaven. You can’t help but breathe deeply and mutter gratitude to the Lord for blessing you with Miguel as you finally peel off your pants and free your aching cock to spring up.
Miguel mewls at the sight, fingers growing fast yet not enough to perfectly stimulate his prostate. Tears pricked his eyes as he whines, “I—I can’t— father, por favor,” You groan at the pleas that fell from his lips. “I’m— please, I can’t do it, I can’t— Want you. Want you so bad.” The thrust of his hand growing sloppy as he gets tired. It wasn’t enough, he wanted bigger. More thick and long, something very warm that could fill his guts entirely and make him feel full.
A curse leaves your lips and Miguel chokes out a moan when you shoved two fingers into his stretched out hole without warning with his fingers still inside. “¡Mierda—!” Gasping at the sting of being stretched open, Miguel grabbed onto your shoulder and moaned as your fingers thrusted into him, forcing his to do the same. The pleasure makes his mouth fall open and eyes shed tears.
“You’re fuckin’ addicting, Miguel.” You say darkly, biting on his throat through the fabric of his turtle neck sleeveless top. He whimpers and tilts his head back slightly to give you more access. A slut correctly dressed in slutty outfit. “You know I’m not a good person right, sweet thing?” You whispered. An underlying mystery in your tone, your head swallowed by horrible thoughts you wish to contain by devoting your life to the holy. “Everytime I see you, I want to just fuckin’ break you and make you mine. Corrupt your soul into the shape of my own. Make you yearn for me, desire me ‘til you can’t live without me.”
Miguel lendered speechless at your display of possessiveness. It was anything but holy. Anything but forgivable. Sin created by the darkness that lurks in your soul; lust, greed, gluttony. You desired him, wanted more of him, and could never get enough of him, the sacred vows powerless against your evil. He should be scared, frightened that those aren’t enough to sustain you, but he really wasn’t. If anything, he felt even more aroused as his hole squeezes down on both of your fingers.
“Then, make me. I want you, all of you. I need you, father, please.” Miguel whines and his hand moved from your shoulder to the back of your neck, pulling you in a desperate kiss. You groaned into his mouth, rubbing harshly against his prostate which releases a muffled cry from him, before pulling your fingers out together with his.
You licked his slick from your fingers and moaned at the taste, keeping eye contact with him. Miguel hides his heated face by the back of his hand. “Aw, don’t go shying on me now, sweet thing. You tempted me, remember?” Faking a pout, you caress his bare thighs and knead the thick and soft flesh that prompts Miguel to slowly lay back down on the table. He feels exposed with wearing nothing but the slutty top that he unregrettably decided to put on today, right in front of you. It made his heart jackhammer against his chest. How you’re completely losing yourself at the sight of him in absolute lust, pupils blown wide.
Standing up from the chair, you push it behind with your foot while inhaling a smoke from the cigarette and align your cock to the entrance of his twitching hole, Miguel’s breath hitching at the contact. “Bésame, por favor...”
You hummed in response and held the smoke in your lungs, leaning in to capture his lips before blowing the smoke into his mouth. Miguel instantly moans, greedily accepting, his legs wrapping around your torso to bring you close. You chuckled into the kiss before slipping yourself inside of him, a stuttered gasp leaving Miguel as your sheer size and length forcibly stretched him open with a delicious sting of pain.
“Father— fuck! B-big, big,” He whimpers.
You shush him, “You can take it, my dear. You’re a good boy.”
You had to grit your teeth to contain yourself from just using him like a sex toy as an egotistical feeling built within you, the monster of your dark desire finally being fed at last. Still, it kept writhing in your guts, swirling around and yearning for more of Miguel. Can’t get enough of him, like an addicting drug that keeps you coming back for more, a living sinful temptation that you don’t refuse. Miguel awakens your demons that you’ve put to sleep by kneeling on the chapel and reciting prayers.
Miguel could see you were struggling hard, even though your nonchalant façade tried to hide it. Darkness screaming to be let out and be your true self, which was being held back by the greatness in you that was afraid of hurting him. However, as much as he loved the softness in your touch, he wasn’t a glass easily broken. He wanted everything of you as much as you did, even if he gets hurt, he doesn’t care. Just like those darkness slips through once in a while, he wants it to be fully out.
“Father, it’s okay,” Miguel whispered and you sharply inhaled a breath when he hooks a hand under his thigh to bend it, knee almost touching his shoulder. He looks at you through lidded eyes as his other hand reached down to spread his hole that clenches around your cock. It nearly makes your head spin with arousal. “I can handle it. I won’t break easily, you can be as rough with me as you want. I’ll be good for you, father. Just please, fuck me, use me.”
You shut your eyes closed and sighed deeply.
Oh, Sweet God, forgive me.
Miguel doesn’t realize he sliced through your self-restraint cleanly as you suddenly pull your cock all the way out, leaving just the tip in. “Wait, what are—” You cut him off with a harsh and rough slam of your hips. Miguel’s mouth falls open in a scream, eyes wide and head thrown back, practically feeling your fat cock in the back of his throat from how deep it buried in his guts.
“You’re— fuck! You’re going to be the death of me, Miguel.” You chuckled, already pulling your cock out to set a merciless and rough pace to fuck him. Miguel chokes out a moan, his hand flying up to grasp the edge of the table. “A whore so willing to take everything of me. Gotta spoil you rotten with my cock, eh?” Stabilizing the cigarette between your fingers, you pushed both of his legs to his chest and slammed your hips down, making Miguel’s eyes roll to the back of his head.
“Thank you, thank you— auuughh!!” Miguel moans loudly, his other hand slamming against the table.
You lick your lips with a dangerous glint in your eyes, “You’ll accept everything of me, won’t you? Even my flaw, even my evil?”
Miguel could barely talk with your cock absolutely ruining his cunt, tears staining his cheeks and drool dripping from his lips, but he tries his best. “Y-yes, fuck! I’ll do— I’ll do anything— ohhh!"
You laughed almost maniacally in happiness, one of your hands moving up to wrap around his throat. Miguel whines desperately and latches his hand on your wrist, spilling babbles of begs as you keep pounding him against the table. His tits bounce in rhythm with your rough thrusts, encaged in those tight sleeveless top, and you lean down to bite down on the covered skin. Miguel’s body writhes underneath you, crying out.
“God shall forgive me for yearning you this much,” You muttered, licking his hard nipple through the fabric while squeezing his arteries.
Miguel’s eyes catches the crucifix before rolling back into his skull, uncontrollable moans escaping.
This wasn’t right, but it felt so good to be wrong. Being fucked by a priest, fucked by you. The filthy sin burning his skin and molding with your equally filthy soul. His mind growing dizzy from the pleasure and the euphoric sense of committing an unforgivable sin with you.
His hole squeezing you down made you groan, pace slowing down as you released his throat. Miguel coughs slightly, choking on his own whimpers. You continue to abuse his prostate with less roughness now, gripping his hips with one hand hard enough to leave a handprint as you bring the other to inhale a smoke again. You blow the smoke into his mouth, Miguel eagerly accepting as he pulls you in a desperate kiss. He had no shame, really. Being your perfect slut in the Lord’s place, in front of the Lord’s altar.
Pulling away, you admire the way he looked. Disheveled hair, eyes glossed in tears with pleasured expression on his face, brows scrunched up together, lips red and swollen. His cock leaked precum on his abdomen, staining the slutty black top. He’s the Heaven you’ve longed to see. A sight to behold.
“So beautiful... So divine,” You whispered, your thrust slow and sensual but sharp. Miguel mewls at the praise. “I should’ve devoured you faster if I knew you’re such a good bitch f’me. Would’ve asked for God’s permission to break you sooner. He would’ve allowed me to.” Your hands gently massage his breasts, making him sigh softly, before it travels down to trace his torso. He’s so mesmerizing; a blessing crafted by the divine beings above.
“Mhm,” Miguel moaned softly as he reached for your face. “You’ve been so loyal and patient, father... Maybe he’s rewarding you for it.” His luscious words tempting and seductive, he licks and nips at your neck.
Releasing a quiet moan, you hummed and wrapped your hand around his throat again as he whimpered, completely accepting. “Then, shall I do as I please with my reward?” Snapping your hips against his, Miguel lets out a gasp at your cock poking his prostate.
He bites his lip, nodding vigorously. “Sí, sí... Es todo para ti.”
You slam his body back down on the table with a groan, Miguel’s hands wrapping around your back and scratching at the skin through your clothes as you pick up your pace, the roughness intended to break him returning. You didn’t care even if he ripped your clothes, the church provides them anyway. Your ears swallowing every heavenly sounds that uncontrollably escaped Miguel’s mouth, your eyes never once trailed away from how divine yet sinful he looked, the sight carved deeply into your memories to never be forgotten.
Thank God for Miguel O’Hara, a man so willing to become the meal just so he could quench your thirst and feed your hunger.
So forgiving, so generous, so kind, despite the fact you were nothing but evil disguised in holy figure.
He’s the answer sent by God to your desperate prayers to keep your sinful demons at bay; he’s here for a purpose, so your desire will be fed and your filthy soul will be baptized to become holy again. The Lord wasn’t abandoning you, no. He was giving you solution to not taint your soul furthermore. Yearning for Miguel was not a sin nor wrong — it was how it’s supposed to be.
It is all the Lord’s plan. Otherwise, how could anyone explain this, right?
“Haah, fuck,” You can’t help but curse as you drill into him, no longer holding yourself back. His hole’s too fucking good. “You’re fucking made for this, Miguel, holy shit. Your guts are practically the shape of my dick,” You laugh breathlessly and press his tummy where your cock reaches, Miguel choking out a sob at the stimulation of being sandwiched from outside and inside. He could feel it even clearer, how you mercilessly thrust in and out.
“A-agh! Es— espera, para—” He was cut off by his own scream when you forced yourself even deeper, stars sparking in his vision and back arching as his body quivered violently, white seed staining his top. And yet, you didn’t stop even after he came, relentless pace continuous as if you don’t care about overstimulating him. Fat tears rolled down his cheeks at your sweet cruelty of assault in his tight cunt, mindless choked up moans and incoherent sentences spilling from his lips.
The corner of your lips twitched in devilish grin witnessing the way his mind breaks and turns into nothing but a dumb mess underneath you. “Lo siento, mi alma. pero es tan agradable romperte.” You licked a stripe of tears on his cheek, hearing the way he whined and moaned. Fuck, his helpless sounds of pleasure never fails to drive you crazy.
“Sí, sí, sí— n-no pares, por favor,” The intense pleasure making his legs shake and his mind delirious, Miguel arches his back to meet your hard thrusts. Dear God, you fuck him so good his head spins. Those women who drools over you as you lead the ceremony will never be able to experience how rough and fuckin’ amazing you fuck, he’ll make sure of it.
Miguel sobs from overstimulation when you harshly bit on his nipple, holding onto you for dear life to ground himself and shake away the threat of falling unconscious from the sheer pleasure you give him oh so generously. Sparks never leaves his vision, which should be concerning if it wasn’t for his will to welcome anything you give with open arms. He brought this upon himself anyway, it will be a shame if he doesn’t enjoy every moment of it.
“Feels fucking good, sweetheart, doesn’t it?” You asked rhetorically and grasp his sensitive cock in your hand, making him cry out and weakly attempt to push it off, the pleasure becoming too much it hurts. “Take it, Miguel. Take it like the slut that you are for me.”
“N-no puedo, no puedo, padre, por favor—”
“Yes, you can, sweet thing.” You chuckled softly, pumping his cock in a slow manner. He couldn’t do anything but cry and whimper as you push him over and over to the edge, forcing out another orgasm. “Cum f’me, you’re my good boy, you can handle it.” Miguel throws his head back as his toes curl and his cock shoots out ropes of cum again, eyes rolling into his skull and soundless scream escaping his throat.
You grunt at his tightness, giving him mercy and slowing down your thrusts but not stopping. “Good boy, Miguel.” Pressing a soft kiss to his forehead, Miguel keens when your hips starts picking up pace a little faster.
Shutting his eyes close, he shakes his head vigorously. “No— No puedo, no puedo m-más— Es- es demasiado—”
You shush him and wipe his tears with your thumb, “I know, I know. Just a little bit more, sweetheart, I promise.” The soft words distracting Miguel enough for him to open his hazy eyes slowly, before you pulled your hips back and rammed into him in one swift motion. You shivered in sadistic thrill at the sound of Miguel’s erotic scream and railed him like a dog in heat, overstimulating him further as he became a babbling dumb bitch who has no choice but to take your ruthlessness.
It would be wiser to cover his mouth because of how carelessly loud his moans and screams were, but you were too focused in chasing your climax and driving him delirious that it didn’t matter anymore.
Soon enough, your cock throbbed inside him and had mercy on the poor perfectly used man as Miguel let out a broken moan, throat already hoarse. “Fuck, pray to me. Won’t you, you sweet thing?” You groan, thrusts getting sloppy due to the knot coiling in your stomach.
“Please—” He chokes out, “C-cum, cum in me, por favor, padre.”
String of curses leaving your lips, you finally met your climax as your cock shoots out sperm and paint his guts in white, the warm feeling making Miguel moan lewdly and cum right after you, rather weakly. His body spasms and quivers non-stop, too overstimulated, unable to calm down from the mind shattering multiple orgasms.
You sigh and slowly grind your hips, just to ride out the peak. Pulling down his turtle neck to kiss the skin properly, you looked at the large crucifix in the corner of your eye.
Forgive me, Lord—
Your plea for forgiveness fall into deaf ears as you seal Miguel’s lips who tried kissing back, but ultimately fell into a deep slumber due to exhaution.
—For I am about to break your blessing’s spirit.
You’re a man of your word. You meant it when you said you didn’t want to hurt him, but Miguel insisted. It isn’t your fault your demons are free now.
And it certainly wouldn’t be your fault that he wouldn’t get to see a daylight anymore.
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© ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴅᴇsʀɪsᴇ. sᴛᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ, ᴘʟᴀɢɪᴀʀɪᴢɪɴɢ, ᴏʀ ᴜsɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ғᴏʀ ᴍᴏɴᴇᴛᴀʀʏ ɢᴀɪɴ ɪs sᴛʀɪᴄᴛʟʏ ᴘʀᴏʜɪʙɪᴛᴇᴅ. ᴀsᴋ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪssɪᴏɴ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴏʀ ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪɴɢ.
427 notes · View notes
ravencincaide · 4 months
Text
You pitiful little thing
Summary: Feeling a little lonely, Chuuya gave into the temptation of saving a stray puppy hiding in a cardboard box. Unfortunately for him, the thing he thought was a puppy, was something much less innocent. OR the time a mere mortal mistook a great kitsune for an abandoned stray. 
Pairing: Kitsune!reader x Chuuya Nakahara
Inspired by sweetober prompt 13: Playing with hair 
Author note: Kitsune in Japanese mythology refers to spirits which can shape shift between human and other forms. The older they get the more powerful they become. While some legends portray them as tricksters others describe them as loyal friends, guardians and lovers. You can read up more about them in this article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitsune 
Also I'd like to thank @soleelia for being a ball plank and someone I could rant to about this idea and finally get inspiration to finish it! Thanks Lia <3
Warnings: Cursing, drinking, smoking stress, finding a stray in a box, Fluffy with a bit of hurt-comfort. 
Enjoy ~
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“ Ehh what kind of sick bastard would throw out a puppy?” 
You opened a tired eye as the lid of the feeble cardboard box that served as your temporary shelter was pulled open, exposing you to the icy rain and chilly wind. Then your eyes snapped wide open as you realized you were not alone. Above you was a man: ginger hair with mesmerizing blue eyes partially hidden by the shade of his top hat. A forgotten, lit cigarette hung from his lips as he crouched down in front of the box, gloved hands keeping the lid open. He was looking at you closely, with a partially confused and partially surprised expression on his face. 
 You crouched down lower in the box, ears flattened against your head. You tried -but failed to shift. Your body was still too weak to take on your real form, leaving you in the pitiful shape of a snow white fox cub. Fuck. Bearing your teeth, a growl tore through your throat as you inched backwards until you pressed yourself into the corner furthest away from him.  You made yourself as menacing and unwelcoming as possible: Go away human you tried to convey Stay out of matters that do not concern you. 
“Hey no need to get pissy with me” the orange haired man muttered as he reached up and took the cigarette between two fingers, taking a deep drag, before he flickered the half finished smoke into a nearby puddle. Then he reached a hand towards you clearly intending to pick you up and out of the soggy box. Instantly you launched forward, sinking your teeth into the leather of his glove. He yelped and pulled his hand back, raising your small body off the floor of the box in the process. You sunk your teeth deeper- half in fear, half in anger at his insolence making him yell louder. With a rough shake he finally got your teeth off his glove, making your body drop back into the base of the box. You let out a low yelp, your injuries, especially your front paw reminding themselves of their existence. Not wanting to appear weak you crouched down again in a defense position. 
“ Ouch what the fuck?!” he yelled down at you, shaking his wounded hand back and forth in a feeble attempt to shake off the pain. “ Fine, suit yourself!” the ginger snapped and slammed the lid of the box back over you covering you once again in darkness. “ You wanna be a brat then be a brat goddamn it!” you heard him growl. 
 A few moments later you felt the box shift and lift, making you flatten yourself against the fragile soaked base. And no amount of growling or hissing seemed to deter him from taking you away or setting your temporary shelter back down onto the ground. Around half an hour later the box finally stopped shifting about and throwing your small body against all four sides. You were royally pissed. Forget about being out of mana and in a fragile injured  body, you were going to rip his throat out with your– 
You were in a man's apartment. 
You could tell from the overly dark expensive design of the room where practicality and price won out over a more homey and warm feeling. The expensive black couch, heated floors and heavy oak bookshelves all reinforced that impression. And it smelled to match; leather, cigarettes and musky cologne. In fact the place looked like something out of a dark romance novel than something anyone would actually live in. 
“ Soooo” the ginger haired man started shifting awkwardly from one foot to the other, holding the lid of the box in his hands “ Welcome to Chuuya’s hideout– like it?” 
You flickered your eyes up to him, resisting the temptation of rolling them as he called his apartment ‘Chuuya’s hideout’. At least you now knew his name. Chuuya– it kind of suited him.
Slowly you took one step and then another one away from the box. You began to carefully look around. Then tilted your head up and sniffed the air; you could tell he lived alone. There were other scents in the apartment but they were weak- mere reminisce of earlier visits and old gifts stuffed in closets or hidden behind locked doors. None of these scents were familiar to you. Unsurprising. Still, what a strange man he was, having a fully stocked wine fridge in what you assumed was the living room and yet not a single picture frame anywhere. 
Strange indeed.  
You took more steps around the place, noting that there were more doors that lead further into the apartment. All of them closed; clearly he didn’t want you to go exploring too far on your own. Very well then. Your eyes landed back on the couch which was now right beside you and you felt a wave of tiredness wash over you. Your paw thumbed, reminding itself of its existence. Still you rested your weight onto it through gritted teeth before jumping up. 
“ Nonono No– not the italian leather” you heard him sigh as you curled up in a ball, draping your long fluffy tail over your body, and burying your face in it. Then you closed your eyes, giving yourself an innocent appearance. But he better not be fooled- you were one hundred percent on high alert, your ears listening intensely for any movement or action he would take. Said ears twitched as your head him groan again to himself.
 “ Don’t make holes in it” Chuuya stated half angry, half pleading “ Or– Or– I’ll shave you!” he threatened. You opened an eye and stared at him. The action made him huff slightly. “ I really will!” 
He wouldn’t. You could tell. 
Growling under his breath Chuuya tossed the soaked lid back into the cardboard box he brought you in before kicking it in the direction of the front door. The box flew a surprising distance and landed right by the entrance. Then you heard him go to the kitchen; the sound of washed hands and opening and closing of cupboards and the fridge echoed in the otherwise silent apartment. 
You closed your eyes, salvaging whatever rest you could get in this warm place; a place that was significantly more comfortable than the cold outside or any of the other shelters you had sought out in the past weeks. In fact you were close to dozing off when you heard him re-enter the living room. You pretended to be asleep, listening to whatever he would do. Acting defenseless was a good way to judge character- if he meant you any harm or knew what you were- surely he would act while you were asleep. 
Instead of danger and threats that were so familiar to you, you were met with surprising softness that almost didn’t suit his character.  
Chuuya placed a rug down on the opposite side of the room, as far as he could away from the leather couch. “ Here” he said “That’s where you’ll be sleeping until this goddamn tsunami passes and I can get you a proper bed that’s your own.” It seems he knew you were not asleep- or maybe he was speaking aloud out of habit? 
You couldn’t tell. But your interest peaked when you heard him leave the room and then come back a moment later. You heard him set down a glass dish, your nose filled with the sweet scent of meat and cheese. High grade cuts- not the scraps you’d normally feed a stray. 
Interesting. 
Suddenly you heard his phone ring. Chuuya cursed, then sighed, clearly not wanting to answer it. He let the song play for a long while, at first making it seem he would ignore the call. Then before the last tune finally played he answered, bringing the device to his face. He sounded cold as he answered, annoyed even. And his body language reflected that. Almost instantly Chuuya reached for a bottle of wine from the wine fridge, popped the bottle open and poured himself a glass. He twirled the alcohol in his hand  while he listened to whatever the person on the other end was saying to him. Then he started pacing, muttering curses and insults while waving the glass of wine carelessly in his hand. 
Opening your eyes, you watched him carefully for a few moments. The frustration and stress which radiated from his body, sadness and aggravation. He downed the first glass of wine before pouring himself another. After the third glass he stopped pacing and just stood in the corner of the room. Silent now, but sadder. Definitely caught up in the complicated mix of memories, work and emotion. 
You paid him little attention. Jumping down from the couch, you were careful to put as little weight onto your injured paw as possible before you slowly trott over to the plate of food he set down for you. The cuts of cheese and meat were, as you first guessed, of high quality. The kind that was used for festive dinners instead of petfood. This would do, you concluded, as you slowly began to eat. The second you moved away from the couch Chuuya moved and sat down onto it, opening his second bottle of wine. This time he did not bother with a glass, and drank directly from the bottle. 
The phone call lasted another half an hour or so. But even as it ended Chuuya didn’t stop drinking. If anything he cursed loudly under his breath, and doused his emotion in the alcohol. By the end of the second bottle he was a mess, by the start of fourth he was no longer sitting up. Swaying in and out of consciousness. 
You couldn’t understand why a human would get so shit-faced drunk that he would end up sprawled out on his own couch, shivering and snoring- torturing himself with nightmares of his own making. For a long moment you sat and watched Chuuya from a distance. The way he’d mutter things- names- in his sleep. Then tighten his arms around himself in a lonely hug. 
Comfort? Longing?
Humans are pitiful creatures you mused but perhaps–you cut your trial of thought off and slowly inched closer. Over the rug, past the bottles of wine and between the legs of the couch-side glass table, Then you jumped up onto the couch flinching as steadied yourself on your injured paw. You waited until the pain subsided until you began walking: skillfully inching the lengths of the fine leather. Before finally jumping down onto the space beside him. You hesitated only for a moment before you stepped onto him; feeling his muscles easily support your cub-weight. 
You could tell he was awake- holding hisbreath. 
You inched upwards until you found his stomach- perhaps the softest part of bone and muscle that made up this man. Before curling yourself up into a ball, making a semi-comfortable sleeping spot. You closed your eyes, remaining calm even as he raised his hand and trailed his fingers through your fur; strand by strand, studying its fluffy texture. Then he applied more pressure, trailing the lengths of your body with his entire hand. It wasn’t long until that hand buried itself in your fur, pulling you closer to himself. You shivered under his touch and subconsciously wrapped your fluffy tail around his wrist keeping his hand close.
“ Ahh Sweetheart, you’re such a good puppy,” Chuuya whispered in a thick voice, somewhere between sleepy, drunk and teary. You replied with a low threatening growl. How dare this mortal compare you to something as insignificantly small as a mere puppy. 
“ Okay okay not a puppy” Chuuya chuckled, continuing to pet your fur “ But a good girl nonetheless.” 
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seabirdtxt · 11 months
Text
.Irminsul Push/Pull
You, the Creator, experience your first day with the world's weirdest roommates. [< prev] [Blog tag] [next >]
Notes: SAGAU, reader is the Creator but no cult shenanigans. mild swearing. very gentle puppet bullying, it's probably the cain instinct or smth. all relationships are currently platonic!
WC. 1.8k
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You’re not super sure what you thought telepathic communication was going to feel like, probably assuming you would hear the voice of the other person saying their message out loud in your head.
In reality, it ends up being more like receiving a text message. In all caps. In your head.
GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE.
You sit up in your bed with a frown when the message suddenly crosses your mind. You check outside the mansion’s window, deeming it to be relatively early in the morning. Curious, you slide out from under the covers and shuffle your way downstairs.
Your curiosity quickly turns to irritation as you hear the sound of tools being thrown and voices arguing coming from the direction of Kabukimono’s room, the only currently inhabited room on the ground floor. 
You slowly push open the unlatched door and quickly duck to avoid a flying object—what is that? a pair of tongs?—that was aimed somewhere in the vicinity of your head. 
“- told you you can’t cook on the forge!” Kabukimono shouts, whiny and furiously stomping around, tossing loose tools around the room. Scaramouche is standing a little ways away from him, holding a bowl of ingredients with a bored look on his face.
“It’s a heat source, isn’t it?” The Balladeer asks, rolling his eyes. “If I can light it on fire, it can cook things.”
“No you can’t! I have to keep it way too hot to cook things,” Kabukimono scolds him, brandishing a metal poker in his direction. “And if you get food crumbs and oil in it, it might affect the quality of the metal! I won’t let you use it, and that’s final!”
“What else am I supposed to use, then?” Scaramouche growls, gesturing widely. “It’s not like this genius Creator of yours, in their boundless wisdom, made a kitchen.”
Whoops. Your eyes scan the room, surveying the damage, until your gaze lands on a terrified Cuppy hiding under a coat rack behind you, close to the door.
“Hey, buddy,” you whisper, inching closer to him. “D’you think you can turn one of the ground floor rooms into a kitchen really quick?”
The little teacup spirit nods frantically and disappears in a puff of smoke, presumably to fulfill your request as fast as possible. 
You look around the room again and spot Wanderer hovering above the other two, one leg crossed over the other in a pose hilariously similar to Ei when she’d been meditating in the Plane of Euthymia. You wave to catch his attention, and he looks over at you with a wry expression before zooming over to where you are.
“About time you got here,” he snarks, landing delicately beside you. “These idiots have been going at it for about twenty minutes now.” 
“I just asked Cuppy to make one of the rooms a kitchen,” you tell him. “I totally forgot about that, I don’t usually make a kitchen inside the Traveler’s teapot, so…”
“Yeah, you use the outdoor one, right?” 
You nod, having briefly forgotten that Wanderer had seen your layout of the Traveler’s realm before. As you’re musing on this, Wanderer darts forward and smacks the underside of Scaramouche’s bowl, causing it to escape the Balladeer’s grasp and sending ingredients flying in all directions, much to Kabukimono’s displeasure. 
“What the- why would you do that?!” Kabukimono wails, his argument interrupted. “Look at this mess! Niwa would have a heart attack if he saw this!” 
“Half of this garbage is yours,” Scaramouche points out, expression thunderous as he picks up one of the smaller prongs on the ground and uses it to take a swing at Wanderer, who takes to the air and floats out of reach with a smirk. 
“Sorry, I couldn’t help myself,” Wanderer says with a shrug. “I was just getting so sick of hearing you guys whining like babies for no reason.” 
“Okay, and you needed to waste perfectly good ingredients, why?” Scaramouche snaps, bending to pick up his now empty bowl and waving it at Wanderer threateningly, visibly restraining himself from flying off the handle.
“Because it’s not like you were gonna actually use them,” Wanderer snaps back. “I am you, and I know for a fact that you can barely make cup noodles if someone else did the preparation for you.” 
Scaramouche quickly turns red in the face as Kabukimono laughs at him, so you step in before another argument can break out.
“Guys, come on, I think Cuppy finished making a kitchen,” you say placatingly, hands outstretched and palms up. The three puppets look at you with varying levels of skepticism. 
You lead the way out of the trashed room, picking one of the other doors at random and hoping that it’s the one Cuppy chose. Mentally keeping your fingers crossed, you turn the knob and open the door, and freeze in the doorway, prompting at least two of the puppets to peer over your shoulder at the scene inside.
Cuppy did, indeed, choose this room. It’s one of the Mondstat-themed bedrooms, and what the teacup spirit did was put a single stove in the middle of the room and replace the bookshelves with jars and cupboards. Everything else about the decor, including the bed, carpet, and wardrobe, is the exact same.
Wanderer can’t seem to help himself about this, either, and bursts out laughing. 
“You call this a kitchen?” Scaramouche asks, pointing at the lonely stove sitting beside the Mond-style bed frame. 
“I think he did a great job,” you try, covering your mouth with one hand to hide your amused grin. Thankfully, it seems Cuppy made his escape as soon as he renovated, because he’s nowhere to be seen. 
“I don’t get it,” Kabukimono says, and you can feel him pushing someone (Scaramouche) behind you to see the rest of the room, to the person’s (Scaramouche’s) protests. “What’s so funny? A good stove and a well-stocked pantry is more than okay.” 
“And,” you interject through your repressed giggles, eager to defend your little teacup spirit. “Having a bed nearby just means you can lay back and relax while you wait for your food to cook!” 
“Are you serious right now? It’s just a stove in the middle of a bedroom!” Scaramouche protests, pushing you aside and stomping into the room. He points at the stove, and then at the carpet it’s sitting on. “This cannot be safe, right? This breaks all kinds of safety regulations.” 
“We’ll just move it aside, it’s fine,” you say, hoping to diffuse the situation. 
“It’s understandable,” Kabukimono agrees. “It’s not like he’s seen a proper kitchen before, right?”
Even Wanderer stops laughing as the three of you stare owlishly at Kabukimono, who shuffles nervously under the attention.
“What?” Kabukimono asks defensively. 
“I actually hadn’t thought of that,” you mutter, hands on your hips as you survey the room with new consideration. “He is pretty small, and who knows if he ventured outside of the realm before…” 
The other two remain silent, seemingly contemplating Kabukimono’s words but not voicing their opinions on it.
IS IT BAD THAT I FEEL BAD FOR LAUGHING?
You hide your flinch well, the sudden message scaring you out of your own thoughts. You steal a glance at Wanderer out of the corner of your eye, where he’s leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. He doesn’t look you in the eye, instead pretending to be very interested with the shelf of ingredients near him.
‘I think that's just normal’ you think, hoping he somehow receives your thoughts as well. ‘I didn’t think of it either, so we’re all kinda wrong…’
While you’re distracted, Scaramouche has already started lighting the stove, having kicked aside the offending carpet, and browses the shelves for ingredients. He knocks on a few of the jars with a frown.
“... These are all empty.” He finally evaluates. 
“Yeah, that tracks, I don’t actually own anything yet,” you nod. “Everything I’ve ever collected is probably still with the Traveler.”
“Presumably they’d be willing to part with some of their stash,” Wanderer adds sarcastically. “I don’t think they really need several thousand of each ingredient they own.” 
“I mean, you never know, right?” You chuckle nervously, thinking of all the bag space your farming must have taken up. How does the Traveler’s inventory work outside of a game-mechanic perspective? You suppose you’re going to find out soon enough. 
“If you’re going out to get stuff, I’m coming with you,” Scaramouche declares, crossing his arms as if daring you to refuse his company. “No way am I staying in here with these guys.” 
You shrug, and Wanderer doesn’t protest either. “Yeah, that’s fine with me. I’ll head out now so we have time to sort and put everything away before lunch.” 
“Bold of you to assume we’re going to get anything done before lunch,” Wanderer mutters, herding Kabukimono out of the ‘kitchen’, promising the other puppet to help him clean up the mess in his room. 
“Are you ready to head out?” You ask Scaramouche, ignoring the jibe. You hold out your hand, which the Balladeer reluctantly takes, and you will yourselves out of the teapot realm.
You materialize in one of the alcoves of the Sanctuary of Surasthana, briefly disoriented by the change in location until you see Nahida and Aranyani sitting on the central dais, seemingly having a quiet conversation. Nahida spots you first, waving cheerfully at you both.
“Your Grace! Balladeer! Apologies for relocating you, but we decided that the chamber of Irminsul should remain uninhabited for now,” she explains, hands clasped together. “After all, it’s too easy to stumble and damage one of the branches of information, and I would hate for any of you to blame yourselves if that kind of accident were to happen.” 
“That’s fair, thanks for doing that for us!” you smile at her thoughtfulness. Still holding Scaramouche’s hand, you lead the two of you down to the central part of the chamber. “Do you know where the Traveler is? We wanted to ask if they could spare some of the materials I had collected from before I came here.” 
“Yes, we saw the Traveler earlier, but they went to fetch some people that Nahida recommended,” Aranyani says, picking up Nahida under her arms and putting the small god in her lap. Nahida doesn’t react, still smiling as Aranyani begins to play with her hair.
“Recommended for what?” Scaramouche asks before you get the chance to. You elbow him subtly, a warning to watch his tone. 
“To help us figure out how and why you’ve descended to Teyvat, Your Grace!” Nahida claps her hands together. “It will be good to know in case you need to go back home, or if you wish to return here from your world!”
You nod, grateful at the prospect of having that option. “Who did you call in for this?”
Aranyani cheerfully answers this for you: “The General Mahamatra, and a scholar named Alhaitham!” 
You share a quick look with Scaramouche.
“The linguistics guy, and the cop…?” You ask, with a slight wince.
“I don’t think you’re figuring this one out anytime soon.”
491 notes · View notes
aftgficrec · 6 months
Note
ah I'm so excited you're open!!! thank you for the ridiculous amount of work you all do 🙏ok, this might be too specific but any fics with an alternate take on Andrew and Neil's post-trk reunion? Andrew gets out of easthaven early, Neil leaves the Nest later, AU's, etc.? i think it's a really interesting point in their dynamic, and I'm a sucker for sober Andrew realizing someone was watching his back for once
Feeling a bit like a Bernie Sanders’ meme – ‘I am once again asking myself why I spent so much time on an ask,’ 😅 but it's because this is such an iconic and beloved scene for our fandom. For a super fun ‘live’ first-time reader reaction to this high drama, check out ‘The King’s Men, Chapter 1 – Hello Foxhole, My Old Friend’ by @nickireadstfc here. -A
also see
Andrew's POV of throwing keys off roof here
‘Come and Save Me From It’ here (completed)
‘Learning To Feel (When You've Forgotten How)’ and the fandom meta posts here
‘pipedream’ here
‘reaching for the heights’ here
‘Lost boy’ and ‘[Un]broken’ here
‘I Know You From A Nightmare,’ ‘The Marks We Make,’ and ‘Draw Me Out, Mark Me In’ here
‘Marked’ and ‘Soulmates who can feel each other’s pain’ here
‘Of Stars and Stories’ here
‘What’s normal now?’ here
long previous recs with reunion mention
‘No More Fucks To Give’ here (updated)
‘The Sphynx and the Hare’ here (completed)
‘corvus, vulpes, lupus’ here
‘never fallen (from quite this high)’ here
‘Not a Pipe Dream’ here
‘everything and nothing begins with you’ here
Andrew gets sober, Neil stays at Evermore
‘Oh Raven,’ ‘Jailbird,’ and ‘Take to the Wing’ here
‘Scared to Live (But I'm Scared to Die)’ here 
 ‘Comeback’ here
you may also like
Christmas at Evermore here plus song rec ‘Far From Home (The Raven)’ here
Proust here plus ‘if you really love nothing’ here
Neil’s a hallucination here
Andreil meet in Easthaven here
‘just a slow body’ here
‘Will you be there when I come back?’ here
‘Here With You’ here (complete)
‘i'm here right now (just be here right now with me)’ here 
‘We're All Stories In The End’ here
‘Spirits In My Head’ here 
‘Fold me in your palms’ here
‘The Raven Prince’ here
‘Thanks, Matty’ here
‘Lullaby’ here
Random Rec - Andrew Minyard playlists round up here
Just a Pipe Dream by loveroulettes [Rated T, 2781 Words, Complete, AFTG Exchange Summer 2021, Locked]
Andrew thought coming off drugs will get rid of all side-effects, so why is Neil still here? AKA the scene where Neil picks up the cigarette from the ground and smokes it, but from Andrew’s POV
tw: implied/referenced abuse
reckless/i like it by Willow_bird [Rated M, 27259 Words, Complete, AFTG Mixtape Exchange 2022]
One thing didn’t seem to have changed since getting off the drugs. One thing almost seemed to have gotten worse. ”The next time someone comes for you, stand down and let me deal with it. Do you understand?” “If it means losing you, then no.” --- 5 times Andrew realized this something he had for Neil was, well, treacherous + 1 time he admitted (at least to himself) that he liked it
tw: violence, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: kidnapping, tw: choking, tw: implied/referenced torture
In the rain by Lyndis [Rated G, 1147 Words, Complete, 2021]
Part 2 of Quick and Dirty, parts 3 and 15 here
Andrew is off his drugs for the first time in years. No one knows he is back from Easthaven and he just wants to see Neil.
Time Machine by Marquee [Rated G, 137 Words, Complete, 2023]
Part 4 of Aftg Poetry
Andrew wanting to kiss Neil on the roof, but he isn’t sure he should. But like a poem?? Yeah.
Tumblr Prompts by lipsstainedbloodred [Not Rated, Collection, 2018] 
Chapter 13: Page 12: What if Neil didn’t go with the monsters to pick up Andrew from Easthaven (Andreil) [T, 2434 Words] 
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced sexual assault
his solace by orphan_account [Rated M, 2292 Words, Complete, 2016]
Andrew’s first thought of Neil Josten was ‘fake’. He was a boy who was clearly lying, clearly pretending to be something he wasn’t; or at least, something he didn’t want to be. Andrew’s next thought of Neil Josten was ‘dangerous’. He was too attractive for Andrew to ignore, whilst single-handedly being the biggest flight risk he’d ever met. Neil looked for exits everywhere he went, and Andrew hated him for it.
tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: violence
Silent Words by Jeni182 [Rated M, Collection, Complete, 2018]
Chapter 2: Colors [T] Andrew hates color. It’s part of the reason why he’s always in black. It’s just easier. The color doesn’t make his eyes hurt. He doesn’t have to think about shit matching. It deters people, a lot of times.
When You Were Young by SpookyMiscreant [Rated T, 1831 Words, Complete, 2017]
It starts when the monsters pick up Andrew from Easthaven. Andrew sits on the roof of Fox Tower and contemplates Neil Josten now that he's sober. Set to the background music of When You Were Young by The Killers.
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied referenced child abuse and neglect
this hole you put in me (wasn't deep enough) by gaygoyle [Rated T, 3368 Words, Complete, 2023]
Neil blames himself for not doing more for Andrew while he's at Easthaven. So, Neil returns the one thing he knows even with his ban- Exy.
tw: implied/referenced torture, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon
Shades of Sunset by darkbluebox [Rated T, 1885 Words, Complete, 2020]
Andrew is five years old, and he thinks orange is the most beautiful colour in the world. Twenty years in the life of Andrew Minyard.
tw: implied/referenced child abuse, tw: implied/referenced csa
Tell Me How You Hate Me by Killingmeslowly_24 [Rated T, 30532 Words, Incomplete, Updated June 2023]
Next to Kevin sat a man who was roughly Neil-shaped, but that was where the similarities ended. Because Neil was brown hair, wide eyes, and a skittish demeanor. Neil was hidden smiles and questions and questions, so many goddamn questions, and- No. This wasn’t Neil. This man was a collage of bandages and bruises, hair bathed in flame. This man was a slack jaw and blue eyes, blue like ice, like an ocean, like drowning, too much like freedom for Andrew’s comfort. ... Or, The King's Men from Andrew's POV
tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: violence, tw: dissociation, tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: depression, tw: blood, tw: panic attacks
Bury it deep down, keep it under your skin by All_for_the_andreil [Rated T, 2123 Words, Complete, 2023]
He only wants to jump off the roof half the time. He supposes that’s progress too. The other half he’s only thinking about it in theory. How many bones would he break? Would he die on impact, like his mother did, or would it take some time? Would he feel the pain, or would it be just pure shock? Would he laugh as he fell? -or- Andrew's life told in snippets
tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: suicidal thoughts, tw: canonical character death
Promptober 2023 by djinthehouse [Rated T, Collection, Updated Oct 2023]
Chapter 2: Falling into his reverse based on the song, The drug in me is you, by Falling in reverse
tw: referenced drug overdose, tw: canonical character death, tw: implied/referenced drug addiction, tw: violence, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: psychological abuse, tw: gun violence, tw: murder
Chapter 4: Weak for the Boy This is based of the song, Weak by AJR it is kind of the opposite of Falling into his Reverse. 
tw: referenced nonconsensual drug use, tw: violence, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: blood, tw: psychological abuse
drop the game by Joana789 [Rated T, 1647 Words, Complete, 2017]
Then, the pills are gone. The buzzing in his veins is gone. The too-bright colors of the world are gone, everything back to its overwhelming dullness again. Neil Josten is, startlingly, still there.
tw: implied/referenced torture
but i’ll know, i’ll know by neilpipedreamjosten10 [Rated T, 2709 Words, Incomplete, Updated Nov 2023]
After Andrew comes back from Easthaven, Neil is missing, and Andrew is the only one who remembers who he is. But Neil never left Edgar Allen. *** This takes place during TKM, a what-if? fic where Andrew returns and finds that Neil was like a figment of his imagination, but now he has to save the runaway.
tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: referenced overdose, tw: referenced suicide, tw: nonconsensual drug use, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: torture
Lost (I Don’t Want To Be) by Demiwitchwoodwalker [Rated T, 4564 Words, Complete, 2022]
Part 1 of Someone(s) To Stay 
Kevin didn't respond, couldn't, and he suspected Riko knew that as his next words oozed with some sort of satisfaction. "I thought I'd give you a bit of a heads up, as a… let's say Christmas present. Your precious Nathaniel's getting inked. It's a shame Jean already got three, it would've suited the little Wesninski."
tw: violence, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: panic attacks
NB: kandrew/developing kandreil
meta
*tw: may include references to Andrew’s canon trauma and suicidal thoughts
Andrew's time at Easthaven meta by series author @korakos [Tumblr, 2015]
Neil didn’t make Andrew want to live. He gave Andrew a reason to give into that want. meta by @haletostilinski [Tumblr, 2016]
The Extraordinary Strength of Andrew Minyard meta by @imaginedmelody [Tumblr, 2016]
the drugs went away and neil was still the same meta by @miniyrds [Tumblr 2016]
after they pick Andrew up at Easthaven meta by @evil-diabolical-oops [Tumblr, 2016]
andrew hates neil meta by @kickfoxing [Tumblr, 2017]
can you imagine Andrew coming back from reliving weeks of abuse… meta by @boris-pavlikcvsky [Tumblr 2017]
Midnight Thoughts about Andreil meta by @saltierthanbottomofapretzelbag [Tumblr, 2018]
Was "If it means losing you, then no" the final nail in the coffin? meta by @blogaboutyafavbirdboys [Tumblr, 2019]
meta about andrew and caring and wanting things by @sinistercacophony [Tumblr, 2020]
thoughts/feelings/deeper meaning of the (rooftop keys/cigarette) scene? meta by @bloody-wonder [Tumblr, 2020]
andrew thinking that neil was just a side-effect of the drugs meta by @twirlingflurry, @buriedinbaltimore [Tumblr 2021]
how utterly, heartbreakingly sad it is that Andrew calls Neil a pipe dream meta by @fortheloveofexy [Tumblr, 2022]
“You were supposed to be a side-effect of the drugs” meta by @sepulchralblues [Tumblr, 2023]
he cannot be real, he has to be a hallucination meta by @neveranniething [Tumblr, 2023]
neil just gives andrew his bands and knives meta by @grooviestguru [Tumblr, 2023]
you may also like
in the dream I don't tell anyone (you put your head in my lap) by Fortheloveofexy [Rated T, 1850 Words, Complete, 2022, Locked]
The real Neil would never allow this, would not let himself be this vulnerable. The real Neil can barely stand to be around him. Andrew knows this. But Dream Neil? Dream Neil is a different story.
Will you be there when I come back? by Shamman [Not Rated, 299 Words, Complete, 2017]
Andrew is trapped in Easthaven with an eidetic memory and tries to focus his thoughts on the confusing image of Neil Josten's face. -Because however terrible it may look, Andrew's current circumstances are much less pleasant. Furthermore Bee has been making him sing and play the guitar in a very therapeutic attempt to make him express some sort of actual emotion over the past year.
tw: violent imagery
You Gave Me A Key And Called It Home by glintchi [Rated T, Collection, Complete, 2019]
Chapter 19: Yes, I Admit It, You Were Right [460 Words] Renee was waiting for him in the basement, fingers already taped, hair pulled back into a tuft of a rainbow ponytail.
Foxhole Tidbits by SpangleBangle [Collection Rated T/M, Updated  2018] 
Chapter 14: My Friend, O My Friend [M, 953 Words]  Prompt for Renee's reaction after Drake/Easthaven and Andrew's return.
tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: canonical character death
Did You Miss Me? by Deathandcommas [Rated G, 555 Words, Complete, 2023, Locked]
Aaron and Andrew have a late night chat after Andrew gets back from Easthaven.
tfw spoons by StrawBerryRains [Rated G, 216 Words, Complete, 2021]
Nicky offers Andrew ice cream when they arrive home from Easthaven.
A Taste of Your Own Medicine by caffeine_withdrawl [Rated M, 66454 Words, Incomplete, Updated March 2023]
Set after the infamous Thanksgiving, but then diverges from canon. Andrew and Bee decide it’s time for Andrew to come off the drugs, but works some magic so that he is allowed to do it in Columbia. Neil is tasked with helping him through it. They decide to do it the same way Andrew helped Aaron sober up, by locking him in a bathroom. Andrew doesn't react well, and switches between rage and panic. Andrew wonders if Neil is real or if he made him up because of the drugs.
tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: body horror, tw: implied/referenced rape/noncon, tw: implied/referenced csa, tw: flashbacks, tw: implied/referenced abuse, tw: drug addiction, tw: withdrawal, tw: vomit, tw: implied/referenced self harm, tw: ptsd, tw: emotional abuse, tw: hallucinations
making it harder to breathe by Azure_Allumiia [Rated T, 1643 Words, Complete, 2021]
Christmas Break with the Foxes, featuring Andrew at Easthaven and Neil in Evermore. Foxes celebrate New Years in NYC with the ball drop.
tw: graphic depictions of violence, tw: rape/noncon, tw: medical abuse, tw: torture, tw: blood
Dead Birds by Noah98 [Rated G, 1601 Words, Complete, 2021, Locked]
Neil just got back from Evermore and Andrew has returned from Easthaven. Riko calls. He wants a rematch and oh boy does he get it.
tw: violence, tw: blood/gore
Art
NB: just a sampling of art for this scene
“Feel Again” original song by @whatbutandreil [Tumblr, 2020]
Picking up Andrew from Easthaven part 1, part 2 comic by @coldcigarettes
andreil keys off the roof scene: animation by @hahanken | comic by @rainbowd00dles | comic by @lunapiq | art by @esklinray
I hate you comic by @thematicallycoherent
I’m not a hallucination art by @clumsyartish
Stick around long enough to figure it out for yourself. edit by @m1nyards
You are a pipe dream art by @viennemort
“you spend all this time watching our backs” edit by @matthcwboyd
not a hallucination a pipe dream art by @kryptidfox
“you were supposed to be a side effect of the drugs.” art by @planetmontressor
"Go inside and leave me alone." art by @dimsunstuff
“No, you’re a pipe dream.” art by @starkingdraws
113 notes · View notes
anothermeforcompany · 7 months
Text
Syzoth(MK1) x Yutu
Tags : Male reader, Syzoth x Male OC, fluff, self indulgence, Syzoth is a babygirl and deserves to be treated like a princess
Syzoth never thought he would be desired by anyone since he is driven away by his own peoples but the feeling of the spirit shaman, Yutu, tapping his chin on Syzoth's head, makes his spine shivers in shyness. It's a common gesture from a male that wants to mate with a female of his peoples, the male will hold the female until they are ready but he didn't expect Yutu would do this to him. They seems to have forgotten that they are not alone or in private area, as they are among friends. Khameleon is covering her mouth in excitement as she is the one Yutu consult with about Saurian's courting tradition, while Mileena is watching this with interest and amusement at the sight of Syzoth's skin getting red, with Tanya smiling beside her.
Johnny is decribing what happens to Kenshi beside him, while Kuai Liang is holding back Smoke from storming over because Syzoth is their honorary little brother and honorary member of Shirai Ryu.
"You must be wondering why I do this, and yes, I know what this genture means"Syzoth can feel the vibration from the wide chest behind him. Yutu's body runs warm, almost like the sun, so it is really comfortable for Syzoth. "I've been trying to court you in the way of my peoples, I offer you my house, I can feed you by giving you food you can eat, and give you a comfortable or luxurious life if you like the later, but you didn't understand"Yutu bend his head to nuzzle on Syzoth's neck, sighing as Syzoth leaning back to him, "So I have to search for another way, and that's to court you in your way, this is the only gesture I can do as I'm not Saurian, I hope it won't disappoint you"he said in humility and hopefulness
Syzoth didn't know what to say. Yutu is highly desirable as a mate, he is strong, able, rich, and good looking by Edenian standard. He can have anyone he wants as a royal healer but he chose Syzoth, with all those gestures to prove himself as a capable mate that can protect and support him. "I'm a Saurian"he said
"I am aware and I like you however you are, Syzoth, I only ask for a chance should you deem me worthy"Yutu replied
Syzoth turn in his embrace and look up to Yutu. He lean up to kiss his lips briefly, Yutu's fists balled but not grabbing Syzoth no matter how much he wants to, he didn't want to scare the outcast Saurian, let him control this pace, but he did sigh to let out some of his frustration. "You are testing my patience, my moon"he said, knocking their foreheads together.
Syzoth feels a rare thrill when he sees how much his actions affect Yutu who is apathetic and cold. A mischievous glint on his green eyes. "I would like to taste your cooking again and we can talk more about this"he said
Yutu kisses his forehead, "I will you tonight, beautiful one"he smiles softly, which is a good look on Yutu that makes Syzoth miss his warmth when the man leaves.
"So when is the wedding ?"Johnny ask
72 notes · View notes
revelisms · 4 months
Text
Don't you want to be—
(what what what, darling?)
—mirror to some piece of this: moon-slash of his wretchedness, recklessness, fawning fingers pleasure-peaked sharp-tongued wickedness—
(why why why, darling?)
—hair slicked back and smile perfect.
His silks feel like death-robes, his pulpit a coffin, his congregation a stew of want and need. His own needs selfishly curtailed and forgotten. Drowned in skin sticky with sweat and voices biting nothingness in his ear: in his brother's cracked-open wines and the slam of his foot on the gas pedal, fueling life into an engine that screams, a vile communion with the hoarse shattering of his own.
At the cliffside, pomade wind-tussled from his hair, layered instead with salt-grime and smeared tears, he smokes.
His mother's own habit, sourly inherited.
The scent is nostalgic the way celluloid film loses its stain: bitter, half torn, stuffed in the pockets of his mind, nonetheless. The same brand of cheap woody tobacco he smells on her when he's close enough to lay his head on her shoulder.
Not that she offers.
Not that he asks.
The sun is dipping on the horizon: a blood-orange half-moon slurped down by a dead sea.
He ticks his thumb over the paper rolled between his knuckles. Watches the ash flutter like polluted snow to his feet. Through his lungs breathes a soldier's quiver, weighing him down like lead: sighs out black magic, white-eye light, the taste of empty pleasure on his tongue, a throat-trip of rusted ambrosia.
He looks not to the heavens—but to the red-soaked sea, below: to the black gate of Olde, the Beneath, the Beyond: wings of skin, not of feathers, beasts gray and fanged, and violet spellwork unspoken in his hands.
In thirteen months' time, the adopted darling will succeed him. The little copper-haired boy he still sees, sometimes, with both eyes that watery ocean-blue. The child his mother wrapped her arms around, without question. The heir his father, in spirit, will learn to accept—after he's carried out his head on a spit.
Him, the doomed Failure from the start.
Him, the one they've all watched and waited to fall.
He hears reason in the memory of Ghoul's—Omega's—his—otherworldly grumbling: that it is one path of countless.
A curse that this eye can see them, at all.
But he feels sureness in his bones, more than any sureness he's known before.
All their days are numbered.
(and yours?)
The stubbed end of a cigarette rolls between his fingers. Against the points of them: a purple spark. The paper folds upon itself, blackened and writhing: burns and burns in hellfire and ash.
A year, if he's lucky.
A smile twitches on his mouth: paintless and crooked.
And, oh—will he give them a show.
Tumblr media
terzo, on premonitions / creator, brother, son
36 notes · View notes
Text
Confession
Warning: swearing, drinking, masturbation, drugs
Tumblr media
You watch the concert with bated breath. The whole experience is exhilarating and wild and just makes your heart pump. It had been so long since you’d seen your best friend live in concert and you’d forgotten what an unbelievable experience it was. You’d also forgotten what strange emotions it sparked deep in your belly.
Something about watching Colson jump around, singing and rapping his heart out, the huge grin that adorns his face as he looks out into a sea of his fans, is something so indescribable but is so attractive that your annoying feelings rear themselves up again. You had managed for years to push them down but when you see him, free and elated, they’re harder to suppress. All you want to do is kiss him, feel his touch, get naked and do dirty things to him.
By the end of the concert, you’re practically hyperventilating in an endless crowd of strangers. You stare up at the empty stage, rooted to your spot. You try so hard to calm yourself but the overwhelming need for sexual release has you scoping out a restroom like a mad woman. As you bring yourself to pure ecstasy in the bathroom stall, hand over your mouth and thoughts of Colson naked and on top of you running through your mind, you’re disappointed at the lack of relief you’re used to. Your brain knows you’ll be seeing Colson backstage in just a few minutes and the idea of being around him has you wanting to shove your hand back into your soaking panties.
You stumble out of the stall and quickly wash your hands, splashing cool water on the back of your neck to calm yourself. You push your way through the crowd, going against the hoards of people which pisses a lot of people off. You show your VIP badge to the security guard and he walks you through a long tunnel that runs under the venue, all the way to the backstage room filled with your closets friends.
“Y/N!” Rook yells as he spots you at the door. He pushes through the groupies to envelop you in a big, sweaty hug. “I didn’t know you’d be here tonight!”
“You’re yelling Rook,” you laugh at him and he covers his mouth apologetically. “I thought I’d come on a Friday night so I don’t have to worry about working in the morning with my ears ringing.”
“Smart,” he whispers and you laugh at him.
He leads you to the mini bar set up that the venue obviously put together for everyone. You make yourself a concoction with the limited spirits and mixers and join the rest of the group. Everyone is talking all at once, your friends, mixed with the other VIPs and a few scattered female groupies. You sit quietly and listen to the conversation, happy to be a causal observer than an active contributor. You have to stop yourself from looking around in search of Colson. You know from experience that he’s usually pretty wired from a concert and is either smoking weed somewhere or in the shower trying to mellow out.
The conversation seems to go on forever and Colson is nowhere in sight as time passes. You’re fighting back the urge to ask Rook where he is or go and find him yourself when he stumbles through the door, disheveled and grinning goofily, a very attractive, half dressed brunette hanging off his arm. Your stomach drops and you suddenly feel very sick. You convinced yourself to forget about the other way Colson will use to chill out. You look away quickly and sink into the couch, trying to make yourself look as small as you feel.
You know you have no right to be upset. Colson has absolutely no idea how you feel about him or what seeing him with another woman does to your self-esteem so all your feelings of betrayal and disgust are completely unjustified. It doesn’t make it hurt any less though. Especially when the women he usually sleeps with are so fucking gorgeous and confident. You suppose they’re probably so confident because of how beautiful they are and your self-esteem would probably be equally as high if you looked like them.
Colson spots you in the corner, despite your efforts to blend in, and he shoots you a drop dead gorgeous smile and wink that makes your insides quiver. He doesn’t immediately make his way over to you, which hurts just a little bit, but you try to ignore it and focus back on everyone’s conversation around you.
You count to 600 seconds in your mind before finally calling it quits. You stand and say goodbye to Rook, Baze, Slim, Sophie and Ashley as quietly as you can do it doesn’t draw too much attention. You smile at the other people in the circle that you don’t know and excuse yourself to the door and into the corridor, hoping for a quick getaway.
“Hey, Y/N!” Colson calls after you and you cringe at the echo of his voice in the small space.
A few workers from the venue at the end of the hallway turn to watch you both before returning back to their conversations, completely unfazed by either of you.
“Hey Kells, great show tonight,” you turn and smile at Colson as convincingly as you can muster.
“Is that why you’re trying to sneak off without talking to me?” he throws his arm around your shoulder and pulls you to his side. You hold your breath so that you don’t inhale his scent, saving yourself from the torture.
“Well, you looked busy and I didn’t want to intrude.”
“Good thing I spotted you leaving then or you would’ve missed out on your invite to the after party.”
You groan internally as you think of the last ‘after party’ you went to with Colson. You ended up blind drunk, sobbing in his bathroom, wondering why you can’t bring yourself to tell him how you feel. Suppressing your feelings as you watch him bounce from woman to woman, blissfully unaware of how soul crushing it is for you to watch, knowing he could never see you that way.
“As much as I would love to, your concert really drained me and all I want right now is my comfy pyjamas and warm bed,” you lie with a fake grin.
“It’s a shame that I don’t really care what you want!”
Tell me something I don’t know.
“Instead, I’m going to show you what you need. ”
********************
Two hours later, you’re sitting on Colson’s couch playing a dumb drinking game with Sophie and Ashleigh. As much as you hate to admit it, you’re actually having a good time. The fact that it just ended up being your friends and no groupies or VIPs from the back room definitely helped your mood. You’re at the good stage where you’re slightly buzzed but not so intoxicated that the room is spinning and you can feel your hangover coming. Colson and the rest of the guys are behind you, shooting pool and talking about some sporting event that you couldn’t care less about.
Sophie drags you and Ashleigh up off the couch as a song comes on the playlist that she insists you all dance to. You’re laughing and dancing along with her when you hear the guys wolf whistle and cheer your moves. Their gazes give you all a weird confidence that leads you all on top of the coffee table, moving and grinding like a scene from Coyote Ugly. You lock eyes with Colson and that quivering in your stomach returns. As the song continues, neither of you look away and suddenly everyone else disappears and it’s like you’re just dancing for him. You move a little more seductively, dipping so that he would definitely get an eye full of your cleavage, your ass, your full lips.
When the song ends, Ashleigh pulls you off the table with a giggle, slurring something you don’t quite catch because of the pounding in your ears. You chug your drink to calm yourself but it doesn’t have the intended affect. You excuse yourself to make another drinking, slipping off to the kitchen. You pour a little more vodka into your cup than you’d intended but you swallow it anyway.
Why the hell was he staring at me? Why didn’t he look away when I looked at him?
You guzzle your third drink in less than five minutes, a queasy feeling hitting your stomach as the liquid rests in it. You rush to the bathroom, feeling like you might throw up. You hug the toilet but nothing happens, instead you just feel suddenly very drunk, staring down into the bowl. A soft knock at the door tears you away from your staring contest and you invite the stranger in. You assume it might be Sophie coming to check on you but when you look up, all you see is big blue orbs staring down at you with worry.
“You ok in here?” Colson asks, leaning against the doorway.
“Just dandy,” you slur.
Oh fuck, I’m very drunk.
“Did you throw up?” Colson asks with a smirk.
“Pfft, please! I haven’t thrown up since I was a freshman in college,” you brag proudly.
God he looks so fucking hot right now. I should tell him that.
“You look good,” you grin up at him. He frowns for a heartbeat before a small smile graces his lips.
“How much have you had to drink?”
“Enough to tell you how sexy you are but not enough to tell you things I shouldn’t.”
Oh fuck, drunk me has no filter. I have to stop talking.
“What things shouldn’t you tell me?” he quirks an eyebrow before sitting down against the wall across from you. He closes the door and you suddenly feel very warm.
“That I think you’re amazing, smart and talented and that I’m pretty sure I’m madly in love with you but that’s ok because at least being just friends with you means I get to be around you and that’s more than enough for me. Until I see you in concert and then I remember how fucking hot that is and it makes me extremely excited, to the point where I have to masturbate in the bathroom afterwards to keep myself from going insane with lust.”
Well fuck, so much for keeping my mouth shut like a good little drunk girl.
Colson stares at you, his jaw practically on the floor as your drunk confession sinks in. It was like word vomit. You knew you shouldn’t be saying any of it but you couldn’t get your brain and mouth to cooperate with each other so everything just flowed out like a river in a flood. You’re slightly too drunk to feel complete embarrassment and the full implications of your actions, instead just patiently waiting for him to speak.
“I…I think you should go to bed a-and sleep it off,” he finally mumbles after a full minute of silence.
“Okey dokey,” you stumble to your feet like a newborn giraffe and make your way up the stairs to one of Colson’s many guest rooms.
You kick your shoes off and shimmy your pants off, slipping under the covers, sleep quickly overtaking you. You drunkenly dream of the sweet blonde man, blissfully unaware of the shit storm you just created in your life.
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mask-of-prime · 10 months
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VG: Added Pressure
Vitani got back onto her feet. She knocked at the side of her head with a paw to shake Nuka's fiery spirit from her ear, coughing out remaining smoke from the big Fire Roar she'd unleashed. She blinked drearily, taking in her surroundings...
The last of the flames had been put out by the Guard, the galagos and other Ndefu Grove residents cowered from the wreckage. They didn't even thank the Guard, uncharacteristic of how they used to treat the lionesses when they'd first met them. She could see that Tazama saw that too. The Keenest of Sight hadn't even tried to converse with them, or anyone. She was turned away with her head and ears low, ashamed of the chaos she'd allowed to happen. The leader hadn't decided on what to do with Tazama yet. Whether or not she'd let her go or give her one more chance, she opened her mouth as she inched closer towards her. Before Vitani could get a word out, however, the step she took caused a large gash she'd obtained in the fight to send an intense stinging sensation up her foreleg. She gasped through her teeth. "Vitani!" The Fiercest snapped out of her pensive gaze at Tazama and turned her attention to Kasi.
"Vitani," the Fastest panted, "No rogues in sight. I scanned the whole perimeter." "They've retreated," the Fiercest scowled, "for now..." "We should retreat, too." proposed Imara. The Strongest wanted to comment on Vitani's condition, but she knew her leader didn't like that kind of attention. "You mean the mission's over?!" Shabaha balked, "We could've had them now, then it'd be over with!" "No." Vitani grunted, "They're already gone. No use provoking them." Imara could see the discomfort in Vitani's face. She had a feeling she knew what her leader really meant. Inside, Vitani truly wanted to go home, but didn't want to say it. A hard thing to express growing up in an uncaring environment. Imara's beginnings were slightly different, allowing for different influences creating her mindset, but she still shared a majority of her youth in the same place as Vitani. ____ Later that afternoon... Tiifu turned to the sound of panting outside the entrance of the Lion Guard Lair. She could see Imara carrying Vitani, who was covered in deep scratches, dark purple bruises, and a black eye. "What happened?" Tiifu whined, running over to the Fiercest. "Got in a little scuffle from that rogue who keeps coming back, I'll live." Vitani reassured. Imara didn't believe that for one second, and never did in all her years of knowing her younger colleague. "Here, put her on the healing table." The Strongest did as instructed, and placed Vitani down. She saluted with a nod before heading out. Pretty soon, Tiifu had healing herbs in her mouth, and an oil extracted from plants sticking on her paw. She was in full nurse mode. "Here, this might sting a little." "Wait, what'll sti --" Suddenly, the oil made contact with a deep scratch on her shoulder. It was an alarming cooling sensation at first, but it started to sizzle. Vitani winced, hard. ROOOOAAARRR!!! The Fiercest had forgotten her roar didn't behave like a normal roar, not for the past year. Pride Rock shook slightly, disturbing the residents inside briefly. "It's alright, Vitani. It only stings for a second. You'll be okay." Tiifu cooed. Vitani didn't know whether she loved or hated being talked to like a cub, sometimes. Vitani's child-like protests to the medicine eventually lessened. She began to cherish the loving care and attention, something she seldom received growing up. Observing Tiifu's work and feeling loved, Vitani relaxed. Trusting Tiifu. ____ The next day... It was early in the morning, Vitani was about to do her usual thing of stubbornly paying no mind to her injuries from the day before as she would head over to assemble her Guard for patrol. A rather reckless habit that worried Tiifu every day. Today, however, Vitani could feel that not happening. She tried to rise from her resting quarters, but was quickly held down by her aching, bruised muscles and scratches that were slowly fighting off infection. Vitani's injuries slowing her down allowed for her to observe her surroundings and put in some thought... When she looked at Tiifu, she couldn't help but think about how grateful she was that the native Pridelander took time out of her day to help her. The special care and attention made Vitani feel genuinely loved for once. However, it also made her wish she hadn't acted so stubborn yesterday. She was going to make up for that. She was going to rest for once. Imara, along with the rest of the Guard, spent several minutes throughout the morning awaiting Vitani's arrival. It was uncharacteristic for her to show up so late. Becoming rather worried, Imara took matters into her own paws by leaving the main section of the lair and heading to the healing section that Tiifu had recently taken up. Lo and behold, she found a weary Vitani glancing up at her, looking as if she were waiting for Imara to come this whole time. Vitani, with slight hesitation, remembering that Imara too had grown up in an environment where weakness was deemed unacceptable, told the Strongest that she couldn't help but feel that she should take the day off, and that Imara should lead without her. To Vitani's surprise, Imara smiled understandingly, proud of the young leader for knowing when to take it easy for once. She promptly marched back to notify the Guard that she would be in charge that day, allowing Vitani to sleep in beside her love. ____ "Well? Did you find her?" asked Kasi. "Yep. She's taking the day off." Imara replied, hopping to Vitani's usual spot on the podium-like rock. "Really? Thank goodness, she's growing up." Kasi half-joked. Shabaha grumbled, shaking her head to herself. "That Vitani's getting soft, I tell ya." she said. The Fastest scoffed, "And that's a bad thing?" "She's completely changing herself for that Tiifu-girl! I had a funny feeling she'd do this." Shabaha's voice grew more frustrated, "We missed a chance to beat those rogues 'cause she called the mission off!" "Keep it down!" Kasi hissed, "She's literally sleeping next door!" Imara cleared her throat loudly, which made the other two cease their bickering. "Because Vitani's out, she's appointed me today. Now, I'm not gonna be the cool substitute that lets you all goof off." The Strongest's eyes fixated on Tazama, who had sat in the back, having not spoken for almost an entire day. She hopped from the podium and got closer to the lioness. "But... I am cool enough to include everyone on this mission. Come on, Taz." Imara didn't know about Vitani, but she knew she wanted to give Tazama another chance. She didn't know why, but she felt she could see that the Keenest of Sight was still trustworthy. It wouldn't hurt to be sure. Tazama hesitated slightly, but she tagged along. She held back tears of joy. ____ "Hey, Imara!" Zuri beamed, "If you're not busy, I thought that maybe we could hang out? Please?" Imara briskly brushed by the slender lioness, shaking her head. "Paws are full. Couldn't have picked a worse time. Sorry." Zuri gasped, "But --" "I'm taking the lead patrolling today. Vitani's resting under Tiifu's care." "Still? --" Zuri cringed, "I-I mean, okay. I understand. Good luck today!" Imara turned back to give Zuri a lick on the forehead, smiling warmly. She quickly spun around once more to head out. While a little kiss was nice, it still didn't satisfy the craving for company. Zuri sighed, she knew better than to hold Imara back for no reason... ____ Meanwhile, back in the Lair... After Tiifu had woken up for the day, upon noticing Vitani's discomfort from her aching muscles, she had fixed up a nice, soft nest she'd found leftover from the former Keenest of Sight's occupation in the Lair of the Lion Guard. Gathering all the straw she could find scattered all over, Tiifu made the new makeshift bed big enough for an adult lioness such as Vitani. She guided the Fiercest to the new spot, using herself as support for Vitani to walk. "Now you stay here, okay? I'm going to get some flowers for the Ponya." "For healing purposes or to make the place pretty?" Tiifu paused a good while before an uncertain smile made its way across her face. "Yes." Vitani sighed, barely hiding a smirk. What a goofball. As Tiifu bounded for the exit, Vitani stretched -- carefully -- and dug herself deeper into the next to get herself to relax. Pretty soon, she was asleep. Unfortunately, about an hour into her sleep, a fit of uncomfortable stirring had woken Vitani up. Her wounds throbbed and radiated pain throughout her body. Essentially paralyzed from fatigue, she stared at the ceiling in a daze, blinking slowly as her surroundings spun. Before her eyes, a glowing, orange mass had taken form. "Vitani..." called the form. It was her brother. "N-Nuka...?" she croaked, "I didn't summon you." "I know, it's weird." the fire spirit, "But, I think it's because I got something important to tell you..." 'Weird' wasn't close to how Vitani would describe what was going on. She wasn't sure if this was real, but she was too lethargic to care. It felt oddly petrifying, still. "You should really be careful with the Fire Roar, 'Tani." Nuka frowned, "You shouldn't use it with the intent to kill, like you almost did with that guy. You could lose it, and me, and I don't think the old guys in the clouds will look at you kindly." "Am I being punished...?" "No, just warned. They're feeling generous, though. They want me to help you get better." Vitani wanted to ask one more question, but her lids felt heavy. She gave into the feeling. "Huh... So be it, then." she sighed, drifting to sleep. ____ The Guard had begun their patrol. Kasi was a little ahead of the step-in leader, frowning and looking down. Imara noticed. "Something wrong?" Kasi sighed, "It's just that... I always thought Vitani saw me as her Second-in-Command all this time. I thought I fit the role just fine! N-Not that I don't see why she'd pick you." "You are bold and quite the team-player, but you can be too cocky." "Well, so is she..." "Agh, good point, but --" "Why not me?" Shabaha pointed to her chest, "I could totally --" "No way!" the remaining Guard members shouted in unison, even Tazama. Speaking of which, they all turned towards her, expecting her own 'Why not me?' input. "Hmm? Nonono -- Don't look at me. I... I'm not leader material." the Keenest of Sight crumpled up, flustered from even being looked at. "That settles it." Imara smirked, "Now, we should start --" "IMAAARRAAAA!" "That sounded like Zuri," Imara charged to Pride Rock, "Till the Pridelands end --" "Lion Guard Defend!" ____ The Lion Guard followed Zuri's calls and wails. They traced back to a cool, dark section of Pride Rock. They braced themselves, preparing for whatever threat dared breach the very home of the royal lions. "Zuri? What's the matter? Rogues? Kelele? Aggressive herbivores?" Imara asked urgently, "They hurt you?" "What? No... I just needed a little help setting up this rock. I need to move it out to the sun, a very specific place where the sub could hit it just right!" Shabaha blinked, "...What..." "You know what? Maybe it is Kelele," Kasi glared, "Because she's clearly crying 'wolf'..." "Zuri," Imara's voice moved down an octave, "Our job isn't to help with renovation, we fight threats. And as you may have heard, threats have been getting worse and worse, lately." "I didn't call the Guard, I called you." "After I told you I was busy?" the Strongest huffed, "Look, I'll get to it later, but I'm booked. Please... don't call us for stuff like this again." "I'm sorry..." "Only call us if there's a real emergency. Understood?" "Understood..." Zuri sighed. A while after the Guard had departed from the cave, Zuri placed her chin onto her palm, staring off. The longer she went without validation, the more she doubted herself. She was honestly depressed as of late, alone with her thoughts, thinking badly of herself, with no one to tell her otherwise. The cycle was endless, and ever-worsening. As one last attempt to clear her head somewhat, she headed outside and strolled about the Pridelands, keeping in mind to give the Lion Guard their space. ____ At sunset... Vitani's insides felt like they were cooking. Her surroundings were arid, dry, and reddish. She moaned pathetically from the discomfort. Kings, almighty, it was hot... So miserably hot... make it stop... Suddenly, Vitani was met with the back of her mother's head. She had only reached the older lioness' shoulder. Her mother had been eerily silent, save for a dripping sound that made its way to the ground every so often. Growing anxious, she finally stepped forward to see her mother's profile. The dripping noise came from her freshly-wounded ear. She had pursed lips, a vacant stare, and suppressed breathing. Odd... Vitani was never this old when this happened... Desperate to get an answer, she spoke up. "...Mother...?" she said in a voice she wasn't sure was even her own, "Are... Are you okay? What are we going to do-" Suddenly, a scream of agony escaped Zira. The lioness slashed at nearby objects. Termite mounds were broken in half, the ground was given deep claw marks, and she found herself swinging towards Vitani, who barely ducked. Strangely, Vitani felt herself going from Nuka's size, to much smaller. She was suddenly looking up at Nuka, who was now a separate lion from her, ducking from the collateral damage. Vitani them found herself crying and mewing rather hard, realizing she'd now been the baby cub that she accurately was at this time. Her fright from the loud noise and violence was what she'd remembered most in reality. Everything that happened before was new information... Nuka sullenly looked down at her, appearing to be confirming this. His look was out-of-place in the midst of the violence. He was aware this was a memory, and he was showing her. The crazed anger and brokenness from Zira's voice seemed to be growing more intense. Vitani felt threatened by it. She suddenly picked up on the nonsensical nature of her surroundings, and made a quick escape... Vitani did not wake up gracefully. Her eyelids felt so heavy that she could hardly lift them. She couldn't go back to that nightmare scape. She had to open her eyes all the way. Seeing a blurry figure above her, she really had to jolt awake, now. With a deep breath through her nose, she slowly rose. A cool, wet leaf fell from her forehead. "Vitani, put that back on!" Tiifu urgently reached for the leaf. "Hmmwhat...? What happened...?" Vitani slurred, shaking her head groggily. She looked awful. Her eyes were sunken in, and her fur was matted from rolling fitfully in her sleep. "I don't know!" Tiifu nervously squeezed a bit of water from the leaf, "You just suddenly started feeling really hot. I really think that lion's claws must've been filthy. Bet my patching up didn't do much help. Come here..." Vitani was confused. Was her interaction with Nuka even real? Or was she deliriously mistaking her body's response to infection with possession? Those sensations felt the same, either way. There was just no telling... The healer lioness unwrapped the largest scratch on Vitani's wrist. Expecting discoloration and swelling, she found something odd. The claw marks had been almost completely closed up and healthily scabbed over with minimal swelling. She supposed the plant gel worked wonders. Vitani squinted. She was incredulous, she could've sworn her wound looked cauterized... ____ The night had been pitch-black. The step-in leader spent hours wrangling the rest of the Guard and responding to various Pridelanders' problems. She had a lot on her plate, promising everyone she'd get to taking care of their issues. She could do this... she was the Strongest... A major problem most animals seemed to have was an issue with the watering hole. Something had been scaring them off from it. No one told the Guard what it was. "What do you think it is?" Shabaha asked. "I didn't see any mosquitoes flying around yet, and no one's sick from contamination, I don't think. Still, why wouldn't anyone tell us?" Kasi noted. "What if it's a trap...?" Shabaha was known for her conspiracies, but that honestly didn't sound too crazy... Tazama, sporting the most exceptional night vision among most cats in the Pridelands, noticed subtle movements in the water. "Uh, guys...?" Before they knew it, a large, red hippo with grotesquely long, yellow teeth burst from the water as it bellowed. It was a very territorial bull. "I got this!" Imara charged, believing in her strength. She's been an even match for a hippo before, she could take this one, too. This bull hippo, however, put up a good fight. It matched all of the qualities the Lion Guard possessed. Alarming speed, keen eyes, bravery for taking on four lionesses, and great strength. It was unstoppable. Growing frustrated and increasingly agitated, Imara used all the strength she had in her to hold the hippo's jaws open, but it wasn't enough. Nothing was good enough, today. Everything suddenly dawned on Imara at that moment. She was failing at everything. She let Zuri down, she couldn't handle the Guard, she was doing a terrible job fighting off threats, and she just didn't live up to her promises to anyone, not even her own. She was supposed to exceed herself every day, pushing the limits so there weren't any, but now everything had gotten the best of her. In that moment, Imara shut down. She laid on the ground with her head in her paws, narrowly avoiding the snap of the pachyderm's deadly jaws. Her muscles tensed as her body pointed downward. She wanted to sink into the ground, almost. "Imara?" Shabaha turned, "What're you doing?! Get up! We need you!" "Imara, what's wrong?" Kasi asked urgently. The remaining Guard was left to their devices. Shabaha fought brutally, Kasi was swift and lithe, and Tazama looked out for opportunities to outsmart the hippo. It still wasn't enough power. On the way back to Pride Rock was a lioness that had been out for hours. It was Zuri. Zuri ceased her sulking and turned her attention to the commotion by the watering hole. She saw the Lion Guard floundering as they tried to fight off the beast greedily occupying the body of water. Worst of all, she saw Imara curled into a tight ball. She didn't look injured, but she looked pained inside, from what Zuri could make out. After a day of calling the Lion Guard for help she didn't need, she knew someone truly did need it. When all hope seemed lost amongst the Guard, they turned to a voice that taunted the hippo. "Get away from her, you ugly bag of blubber!" Imara slowly turned around. She couldn't believe it. "...Zuri?" The hippo turned its attention to her. It roared in her face. "Oh, was that supposed to scare me? The only thing scaring me is your breath. You ever let a bird pick your teeth every once in a while?" The creature was confused at this lioness' obliviousness to danger. Whatever, this target had to be eliminated. "Seriously, what's your thing, like, rabies? Come on..." Zuri with her sassy flare, went to lean against a tree. Little did she -- nor anyone else -- know, the tree was uprooted from the hippo blindly charging at anything in front of it. Noticing the tree tipping over, Zuri dashed out of the way. The tree slammed right atop the hippo's head. It sank in the water. Not once rising back up. The hippo must've been unconscious, and hopefully out for a good while. "Zuri... y-you saved us!" Imara blinked, astonished. "Didn't think you were the type." Kasi remarked. "Well... it felt good, heh, helping others. I mean... it just makes me feel like an even better person." Zuri blushed, fumbling. Imara chuckled. She knew Zuri had an ego, but she knew that's just how the native Pridelander rolled in this world, and the Strongest wouldn't change a thing about that. ____ The following morning... Imara took a breath. She was ready to start the day as she normally would; intense workouts, a hearty meal, and anticipating the challenges the day would bring. "Hey, Imara! Shall we now begin our date?" Zuri smiled in hope. Imara shrugged, "Why not? Been putting it off long enough." Zuri grinned, "Excellent!" Suddenly, Imara felt Zuri shoving her against a reclined, cushioned rock. The Strongest then felt slices of fruit -- that Zuri explained to be rejuvenating -- onto her closed eyelids. She felt one of her gargantuan paws being pulled away, her claws popping out with pressure on her palms. Her claws were being filed. Hopefully she wouldn't be needing them anytime soon... Throughout this spa session, Zuri gossiped about her latest goings-on, and she had a lot to talk about what with all the lost time between her and Imara, lately. Imara lifted a fruit slice from her eyelid and looked around, listening to her surroundings as Zuri talked. Not a single creature stirred or called in distress, the breeze was calming, and the flowing water was soothing. Perhaps there was room for a day of peace. Realizing this, Imara smiled, kicked back, and resting her head against the chair-like rock formation. ____ ((Author's Note: The series of drawings I made last year for Pride Month have been adapted into a full episode. Luckily a lot of the drawing for some main plotpoints was already done beforehand last year lol (and long before I considered making a continuous storyline). The other side of those stories have been turned into an Imara-centric episode to follow Tazama's story, and doubling as a Zuri-centric episode out of revenge for TLG not giving Zuri an episode lol The name of the episode has a double-meaning: "Add pressure" is an instruction given to stop one's bleeding in case of a large wound, which is relevant to the Vitani/Tiifu B-plot. It also refers to gradually building stress, which we see Imara deal with as she fills out for her leader, dealing with the Guard's antics, Zuri's attempts to get attention and seek validation, and unexpected, new foes. When thinking up an antagonist for this episode, I thought to look back to older concepts I had in my head during the early days of making VG art where I wanted to showcase a terrifying depiction of a hippo, seeing as they're almost never portrayed as fierce animals in media (with maybe the exception of those hippos that snap at Moses' basket in Prince of Egypt for like a few seconds). Also, I just thought a rampaging hippo would make for a great match against Imara's strength, and as a foil to her current Night Pride counterpart, Beshte. The visuals in this illustration are based on night vision footage, explaining the black sky, use of green, and terrifying inverted eyes on the hippo. Lastly, as you may have noticed in the Ponya (meaning "heal" btw, thought I'd give that section of the Lion Guard Lair seen in Eye of the Beholder a name), there's a rather familiar-looking crystal beside Vitani. It's a piece of those crystals found in the caverns in that one shot of The Underground Adventure. I like to think Tiifu kept some souvenirs from her visit to said caverns, personalizing the Ponya to her liking as she begins to get used to occupying it more))
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selnyam · 15 days
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A Reunion
a small story I've been meaning to write, of how Flidais formed her Reaper pact and the long lost secret she uncovered in the process
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"You'll need to summon a voidsent to make a pact with" Drusilla had told her. Training in the combat style of a Reaper appealed to Flidais. Fighting alongside Zero had peaked her interested in the art, and that stranger in Ul'dah had hired her to stop "The Reaper." A simple conversation, a meeting with Drusilla who noticed her voidtouched nature. Now she was walking through the abandoned Haukke Manor. The old manor had once been full of voidsent and spirits, now since cleared out by her own hand. The void energy lingered still, Off putting to many. She found something calming about it though, having procured many of her homes furniture from the old manor. What better place to summon a voidsent to form a pact with? A voidtouched Viera summoning a Voidsent? What would the Coco brothers think?
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Her path led her to the dungeons in the basement, something drawing a dark corner. Drawing her axe from her back she took a deep breath, feeling for the weakness between worlds. This was the spot, this was where she needed to act. Someone was here, someone for her so she reached out her aether and swung the axe. A portal tore open and she prepared to fight if need be, to destroy anything aggressive that burst through to feed on her. What tumbled from the void was a shape, a bundle of wings and void smoke. She swung her hand and threw her axe to the side. Something familiar was here, something nagging at her mind. Flidais swallowed hard and reached out, the light aether that still lingered in her wounds and scars from the First spreading forth to purge the darkness from the form. A most famliar form.
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The Viera woman looked up to meet her gaze, wings and horns adorning her body. The exact same wings and horns Flidais herself kept hidden away. The dark haired duplicate looked up and spoke, in a language Flidais knew but had long forgotten, in a voice she hadn't used since a scar made her mute.
"Shite. I never thought I'd see myself again. Guess it did work after all, Thanks me! Though damn, I've been working out!"
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chipsbarista · 5 months
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Kiss the Go-Ghost
A JeGulus Microfic. 876 Words. Word of the day: Ghost.
When James moved into his new apartment he did not expect it to be haunted. 
He'd brought shamans, and ghost hunters, he'd even gotten Lily, his witch friend, to do cleansing rituals for him. Nothing had worked.
Despite all these attempts he'd still see the pale man sitting in the corner of his room at night while he tried to sleep. Lily had said that he wasn't an evil spirit , but still. Having someone watch you as you sleep was uncomfortable.
That wasn't all, objects moved on their own, eerie whispers filled the air, and chilling cold spots seemed to materialize out of nowhere.
So James stayed awake that night, just watching the ceiling fan circle round and round. He sighed.  "What's your name?" He finally asked.
"Oh. Uh. I did not expect you to talk to me for some reason." Came the icy voice. "I'm Regulus. Regulus Black."
"Well Regulus, please stop staring at me." James pleaded.
"Sorry."
Silence reigned in for a few long minutes, and while James could feel that Regulus no longer looked at him, something still felt wrong.
"Want to join me?" James asked, though from where the outlandish idea came from he wasn't sure.
"On the bed?" Asked Regulus.
"I mean why not? At least you won't be staring at me." 
James's suggestion was met with a momentary pause from Regulus. It was an unusual proposition, inviting a ghost to sit on his bed, but given the circumstances, James was willing to try anything to make the situation less uncomfortable.
"Sure," replied Regulus hesitantly, and with an ethereal grace, he glided over to the bed and seated himself at the foot of it. It was strange to see a ghostly figure taking a physical form on his bed, but James was relieved that Regulus had stopped staring at him from the corner of the room.
The two of them sat in an uneasy silence for a while, James still unable to shake the eerie feeling of sharing his bed with a ghost. He decided to break the ice. "Can I touch you?" he asked.
"You'll get cold." Came Regulus' voice.
"Eh, I have a blanket." James turned to his side, staring at the ghostly figure, whose head was just now turning to face James.
Regulus hesitated for a moment, seemingly surprised by the request. "I haven't been touched in a very long time," he replied, his tone tinged with a hint of sadness. "But if it brings you comfort, you may try."
With cautious curiosity, James reached out his hand toward Regulus. As his fingers made contact with the ghostly figure, a shiver ran down his spine. Regulus felt cold, as if his touch had plunged into an icy abyss, but there was also an ethereal quality to it, like touching a wisp of smoke. Regulus's form seemed to ripple slightly as James's fingers made contact with him, almost like the surface of a pond disturbed by a gentle breeze. James shuddered, but not from the cold.
"You're beautiful." Whispered James in the dark.
Regulus, the ghostly figure, was taken aback by James's unexpected compliment. For a moment, there was silence, broken only by the soft hum of the ceiling fan overhead.
"You... you find beauty in this form?" Regulus asked, his voice tinged with surprise and a hint of longing.
James nodded, even though Regulus couldn't see the gesture. "Yes," he replied, his words filled with sincerity.
Regulus' fingers reached to grasp James' hand which now cupped his cheek. Regulus's form seemed to shimmer slightly, as if responding to James's words. "Thank you," he said softly, his icy voice carrying a touch of warmth.
As Regulus's ethereal fingers gently clasped James's hand and James's palm cupped his cheek, an electrifying connection sparked between the living and the dead. James could feel the coolness of Regulus's touch, but it was accompanied by a strange warmth, as if a long-forgotten ember had been rekindled.
Their faces were now inches apart, and their eyes met in the dimly lit room. Regulus's translucent eyes, once filled with sorrow, now held a glimmer of something different—hope, perhaps, or a longing for the simple human contact he had been denied for so long.
Their breaths seemed to synchronize, and for a fleeting moment, the boundary between the living and the dead blurred. In that moment, it didn't matter that one of them was a ghost and the other a mortal; what mattered was the profound connection they had forged.
In that charged moment, with their faces mere inches apart, James felt an irresistible pull toward Regulus. Their lips met in a soft, ghostly kiss, and the room seemed to hold its breath as their lips touched, and a gentle warmth spread through James's body, contrasting with the coolness of Regulus's presence. It was a kiss that defied logic and reason, a kiss that spoke of a connection that went beyond the realm of the living.
As their kiss deepened, their souls seemed to merge for an ephemeral moment, and in that union, they found a kind of solace and understanding that words could never convey. It was a bittersweet embrace, a union of two worlds that should never have met but had, against all odds.
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takeyourcyanide · 22 days
Text
Ceaseless
(Soul Eater Fanfiction)
TRIGGER WARNINGS:
Mentions of Rape, Mentions of Violence and Gore
Characters:
Franken Stein, Spirit Albarn, Marie Mjolnir
Word Count: 3 164
Summary:
Though nothing could truly ever quell the churning hemispheres of his brain, he’d take whatever he could get. Whether that be nicotine, or some egregiously opulent perfume.
Notes:
Not beta read. I also hope my writing isn’t becoming one-note. Perhaps I need to switch it up a little somehow. I don’t know how much I like this, but I’m working on another one.
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……
Stein leaned against the large, grey pillar standing father away, and on the right side of the silver double doors to his laboratory, a cigarette hanging between his two, torn lips. He allowed the bitter smoke to continuously burn the back of his throat with no end, flowing downwards and entering his lungs, pleasurably lingering within them.
The ashes present on the lit end of the cigarette sluggishly slipped off, landing and spreading about on the concrete flooring below his still feet.
He could feel the sensation of the nicotine from his sixth cigarette flooding his brain, seeping into his blood stream, stirring in his stomach, and enjoyably clouding, yet clearing his fogged mind - and if not clearing, then making the shouting match in his head easier to ignore, even if only by a small margin. He’d take whatever he could get.
The light reflected by the malevolently grinning moon stretched far outwards, blurred and just as fuzzy as his head. He had forgotten his glasses inside.
Stein felt the urge to scan the area around himself, the striking feeling of people’s eyes upon him, perhaps they were marching up to him, hands reaching to strangle him. He merely moved his eyes, glancing beside himself, as despite that inclination, his body would simply not move. He almost felt as though he wasn’t allowed to. A part of him did not want to. He was unsure as to why it happened.
“Stein?” A whiny, masculine voice interrupted Stein’s… Well, he didn’t really have a proper train of thought, did he? That track had been derailed before he was even born.
Long locks of crimson hair entered his view, as well as a generic, yet classy black suit and tie. Simultaneously heavy and flighty footsteps sounded throughout the gradually cooling Nevada desert, hitting against the concrete of Stein’s laboratory.
“What’s up? It’s been awhile,” Spirit held up a hand and waved a little, attempting to make some form of small talk with the unresponsive Stein. It seemed as though there was more on his mind than meaningless chatter, of which he knew Stein disliked.
Spirit chuckled, presumably attempting to break the awkwardness of the silence, switching randomly between a polite smile and a pursed frown.
“Uh,” the weapon began, scratching the back of his head. “Where’s Marie?”
Stein begrudgingly and slowly pointed towards the massive doors, morose-appearing eyes burning holes into Spirit’s shaken soul.
“Inside?” He asked for clarification, head nodding in the same directing as Stein’s pointer finger.
Stein allowed his arm to fall beside him, as more and more of his cigarette burned to crisp, crumbling into floating and falling ashes.
“She must be watching you like a hawk, huh? I’m surprised she let you out here,” Spirit forced out a laugh, shoving his hands into his pant pockets.
“Why’re you here?” Stein mumbled a barely audible and unhurried sentence, as though he was carefully thinking about how to speak and what to say, muffled even further by the cigarette in his mouth, which was practically gone, only releasing little puffs of smoke from his oral cavity.
“Well-“
“Did Lord Death order you to come here?”
Stein’s eyes were wide - unnervingly wide and suspicious, seemingly finding every movement, every breath the scythe took to be conspicuous - to be evidence of some sort of premeditated attack. He did not blink, he did not move, the cigarette’s fire no longer burned as Stein let it fall from his lips onto the ground.
“Sort of. I also wanted to check on you-“
“Check on my stability in order to determine whether or not I’m useful to the academy and Lord Death’s agenda?” Stein rushed out, his words a little slurred and shaky. His fingers strangely twitched, though the rest of his body maintained its position against the pillar.
Spirit released a deep and solemn sigh, stepping a little closer to Stein, only for the meister to tense up.
“How are you, Stein? Seriously,” he inquisitively tilted his head, his eyes holding a concerned and sincere glint within them.
‘He really is a decent actor,’ the scientist thought to himself.
Stein glanced around his unorthodox “yard,” observing the clanking and artificial squeaks being produced by one of the robotic mice he had built.
“Why are you hardly talking?” Spirit questioned, his eyebrows furrowing as that previous frown his mouth had been contorting into returned once again.
Stein moved his eyes back to Spirit’s face, of which appeared to be almost.. disappointed. Did he want him to speak that badly? He really wanted information out of him. He was certainly going to use whatever he could acquire to his advantage.
Once more, an exasperated sigh rocked the death scythe’s body, as he turned on his feet.
“I’ll check on you again later,” he spared a parting glance behind himself at the unmoving Stein. “You’re strong. The strongest person I know. Remember that Stein.”
Spirit sounded so vulnerable and genuine, which left Stein disappointed himself, as not even such encouraging words from Spirit could quell the tornado hurling his brain around on loop.
His former weapon-partner disappeared into the darkness of the night, the stars doing nothing to illuminate his figure.
……
Stein cautiously and robotically turned his body to face the steel doors, trudging towards them and opening them with an eerie and cacophonous creak.
He had stood out for another five minutes or so after Spirit had taken his leave, taking in the lurking scent of cigarette smoke, as he basked in his own mixture of hollowness and pure and unadulterated anguish.
“Welcome back, Stein,” Marie gazed at him with a kind smile, sitting on one of
The two sofas, a cup filled with steaming tea in her hands. “I made you a cup of tea,” she pointed towards the mug on the wooden coffee table. “It’s still really hot, though, so be careful. I already burned my lips.”
Stein looked between the two sofas, unable to decide whether or not he wanted to sit beside her or simply sit alone.
“Why don’t you take a seat?” She patted the cushion next to the one she was sitting on. “I’ve got something really sweet to show you.”
‘Really sweet? Is that some kind of euphemism? What is she gonna do, rape me? It would be the perfect time do as such - while I’m vulnerable,’ he pondered, cautiously making steps towards the sofa opposite to the woman.
Marie chuckled in confusion and slight amusement. “Why do you look so… apprehensive, Stein? I was just going to show you all of the get well cards your students have been sending you.”
‘Was that a lie?’
Stein grabbed the cup of tea Marie had poured for him, closely examining the liquid held within the mug.
“What are you doing?” She asked, an eyebrow raised. “Oh, and where are your glasses?”
Stein peered up from the tea, which had been warming his frigid face and hands, his eyes narrow with what had stricken Marie as being an ever-brewing suspicion of her.
“I didn’t poison it,” her bright smile was replaced with a more serious, yet gentle look, as she stared at him directly in the eyes.
Stein placed the cup down, his movements sloth-like and still apprehensive and cautious, as though he were expecting to be slapped for doing so.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to drink it. I only made it in case you’d end up wanting some,” Marie assured the meister as he silently observed her.
“How about I show you the cards?” She suggested, retrieving the short pile from off of one of the side tables. “Would you like me to give them to you? Or perhaps I could sit beside you, if that’s okay?��
Marie was met with more silence and a few glances here and there, as he looked around the dimly lit room.
“Hm… Would you prefer if I just decided? Usually you like to make the decisions, but it’s fine,” she chuckled. “Actually, how about I just read them from here? Yeah… that’ll work.”
Stein looked almost frightened - a face she was sure no one had ever seen on him before, perhaps not even himself - and she didn’t want to worsen anything.
“I don’t want to read anything,” Stein spoke up, rolling his bottom lip between his teeth.
“Oh… Why not?” Marie lifted her head in response, carefully placing the cards onto the coffee table.
“Just don’t.. Not right now.”
What was the point of reading a bunch of lies? They probably felt obligated, or were told to write them - or maybe they even wanted something from him.
When would they learn that flattery would get them nowhere?
“Well, that’s all right... How long has it been since you’ve last eaten?” She stood, heading towards the kitchen.
“Don’t know,” he replied. “What month is it again?” Stein sounded disoriented, out of his element even.
“It’s October,” Marie opened a cabinet, retrieving a little bag of potato chips. She was sure he’d refuse to eat anything substantial in… whatever state he was currently in. It was highly likely he’d even deny the offer of just one chip.
“Here,” Stein flinched backwards the very moment she outstretched her arms, presenting him with the bagged snack. “It’s okay,” she chuckled. “I wasn’t going to smack you or anything.”
Stein lifted his arm in small bursts, accepting her offer, placing it in his clothed lap as he stared down at the food.
“Aren’t you hungry?” Marie tilted her head just as Spirit had, speaking in a soft, inquisitive manner.
Stein lightly shrugged his slumped shoulders, raising his head to gaze up at his partner.
The blonde scooted closer to the sofa, closer to the area directly beside Stein. He intently watched her every step, every twitch of her eyes and extremities.
“Is it okay if I sit here?”
An unpleasant sensation rushed throughout his body, one familiar to him, for it had seemingly taken over him entirely as of late. A million nonsensical thoughts bolted around aimlessly in his skull, the only few he could make sense of being; ‘What is she planning?’, ‘What does she want?’, ‘Why does she want to sit next to me when there’s another couch over there?’.
Stein couldn’t make sense of whether or not he was indifferent to her choice of seating or completely and utterly paranoid of it. Perhaps both simultaneously?
Marie continued to stare expectantly at him, awaiting some kind - any kind of response. But Stein couldn’t make any sense of the incessant rambling attempting to evacuate from within him.
“I’ll just sit down, then,” She rested against the plush back of the sofa, relaxing into it with shut eyes and a smile.
Once she separated each eyelid from the other, she turned her head, facing the male to her left. Her smile quickly devolved into a visible frown, as she observed the darker patches of skin underneath his eyes, how unkempt his hair was, and how little he seemed to blink, examining every minute detail possible, always on guard. The odor of cigarette smoke was always one he carried with him, but it was more potent than it had ever been in that moment.
“You know you’re safe here, right, Stein? You’ll be okay,” She nodded her head, speaking in the kindest, most compassionate voice she could muster.
“I know you’re only saying that so I’ll believe you,” he emptily stated, glaring at her.
“Believe me?” Marie straightened her back, fixing her posture as she sat upwards.
“Yes. I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but there’s no point in lying anymore. I know what you’re doing.”
Marie sighed, even more deeply and full of consideration than Spirit had, as she peered down at her hands, appearing rather conflicted.
She opened and closed her mouth, quiet sounds escaping her. “I promise you, I’m not ‘doing’ anything. I would never intentionally harm you, or any of our friends for that matter,”
“Why should I believe you?” Stein squinted his eyes, strung out and wildly fluttering his eyes about the room.
“Have I done anything yet?”
“No, but that could just be so I’ll trust you.. You want to gain my trust and utilize it your advantage. Of course, you wouldn’t tell me if you were doing that, though…”
Marie resisted the urge to attempt to physically comfort her meister, to get any closer to him than she already was. She was lucky she even managed to sit side by side with Stein.
“I hope you can learn to trust me,” she began quietly. “You deserve to have someone there for you that you can trust.”
Stein’s eyes bulged from out of their sockets, his jaw hanging slack. “What?”
“I think you deserve that,” she giggled in response to his shocked facial expression. “What’s so surprising about that?”
“Why?” He murmured, unable to take his confused eyes from off of her tender ones. “You’re lying.”
“I’m not, I can assure you,” she generously grinned at the man. “And you’re my friend, my meister. Of course you deserve to be able to put your trust in another.”
Stein, taken aback and dumbfounded, moved his gaze from Marie and to his hands, curling them inward and outward, almost as if to check if he were even alive.
‘She seems genuine.. but she can’t possibly be, right? Why are they all so good at acting sincere? Like they care? What’s the point? What do they want? Is it sex? Is it to hurt me? Why? Because I hurt them? Did I? I did. But I can’t help that they’re test subjects.. That’s just how I view them. Everyone only wants the same things.. But no, she’s right. But is she? She wants me to lower her guard so she can do.. I don’t know what she wants to do. Why is she even here again? Oh, yeah, she was ordered. She’s gonna poison me. She’s here to satisfy her own desires. Incentives. Wait.. what? I can’t fucking… Just shut up.. Is she even real? Where’d the real Marie go? Is this the real Marie? Is this a demon trying to drag me back down to hell? But I’m already there. What is she and why is she here? No, no… I’m being stupid again. She’s real, she’s alive, I’m alive. Am I? It doesn’t feel like it. Oh, my God…’ Stein appeared frazzled, his hand attempting to yank out his hair, perhaps even his own scalp. His eyes were still bugging out of his head, as they held a look of pure confusion, annoyance, paranoia, and misery all put together - a concoction leaving him desiring to rip out his own intestines and stomp on them repeatedly, to lay in a puddle of his own blood and make snow angels in the dark, metallic liquid.
He just wanted quiet. He just wanted to know what safety felt like, what peace felt like. That was all he ever wanted.
He wanted to just give in.
“Hey, it’s okay, Stein. What’s wrong?” Marie’s previous control over herself vanished as she placed a hand on Stein’s taut back, stroking up and down, leaving him to jump away from the touch. “I’ve never seen you so jumpy before. It’s like there’s two ‘yous’ sometimes.”
“Go’way,” he muttered involuntarily, not even realizing the words had slipped from his lips.
“Go away?”
“Huh?” Stein fervently blinked, turning his head in every which direction. Everything was closing in on him now. “Please..”
“‘Please’ what, Stein?” Marie held her hand in the air, uncertain of whether she should try to soothe the male or not.
“I don’know.. Jus’.. Just…… Can’t speak..”
“That’s okay, I don’t mind.”
Blood beaded upon the surface of Stein’s bottom, chapped lip, much to the worry and displeasure of Marie.
“Oh, Stein,” she cooed sympathetically, reaching out and grabbing him. He writhed, desperately trying to get away from her, not having been prepared for such contact, though Marie did not budge. “You gotta stop chewing on your lips, dear. That’s not good.”
He eventually stopped fighting her affectionate gestures, allowing her to hold his head down in the crook of her neck, being overcome by a bubbling, and all-consuming emotion he couldn’t handle. He’d never felt anything so strongly before.
It was a paradox, truly. There was a part of Stein that enjoyed and welcomed danger, and another part of him that was steering him currently, shouting at him to run from Marie’s supposed generosity, for she’d take advantage of how wide open he was in some way. He didn’t know how or why, but he knew she would.
“It’s all right, Stein. Relax. You’re safe,” she said, languidly scratching at his surely aching scalp, smoothing over his disheveled hair.
“‘M not,” he garbled into her skin, of which was leniently coated in her habitual perfume - some sort of floral mixture.
“You are with me. Maybe not with yourself at times, but you are with me,” Marie noiselessly and serenely reassured Stein, wishing to herself that the poor guy’s body would become just a little less stiff.
“Spirit came,” Marie held back a snicker at the random comment, a hand rubbing up and down his back once more, massaging the rigid muscles underneath.
“Oh, really?”
“Yes. I don’t think he likes me much. Didn’t talk enough,” Stein spoke under his stuttered breath.
“I think he likes you,” Marie drawled. “Even when you don’t talk a lot.”
“No, no. I don’t mind it. But he was disappointed.”
“I’m sure he was just worried.”
“He’s just reporting back to Death. It’s business. I think he’s got shit in here somewhere to listen and watch. Or you. Or both.”
“I, Marie, do solemnly swear that I have not done or am doing anything of the kind,” she raised her right hand, a small smirk present on her visage.
“Being serious,” Stein grumbled.
“I know, I know. I just wanted to lighten the mood a little,” she apologetically elucidated, patting him on the head.
“Don’ feel good. You know. You’ll use it,” he whined exhaustedly, sinking further into Marie’s grasp, despite the fact that doing so left him feeling so utterly worn and even agitated.
“I know, dear. It’ll be okay.”
“When?”
“I don’t know,” she answered honestly, earnestly, and even a little sorrowfully.
Stein wanted to trust her, he really did. It didn’t matter how hard he tried to believe her, to put his trust into her, he was always stopped by the ceaseless static. What was silence like? Was it nice? He was sure it was.
Stein ignored the expected whispering and the breathing, the stomping sounds, he ignored the short and tall, dark and blurred shapes. He tried to focus, instead, on the flowery scent illuminating from Marie. It was calming in a way.
Though nothing could truly ever quell the churning hemispheres of his brain, he’d take whatever he could get. Whether that be nicotine, or some egregiously opulent perfume.
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