Tumgik
#a bit about my problems but i just ??? did not feel anything at all ! we love the dissociation !
weneeya · 3 days
Note
Hi love I hope you're doing well <3 can I ask for a Kageyama hurt to comfort :(
-mia
(Yes I could just ask you straight but its funnier that way)
Miscommunication
hurt to comfort with Kageyama
hiii took some time but I'm here love <3 feel free to request anyway!
Tumblr media
Any form of communication had always been difficult for Kageyama Tobio, and for a simple reason : the boy never learnt how to do it. He had always been alone or when he tried to do something, it was always a failure ; simply look at his years before highschool. 
So when it came to his own feelings, it was probably worse than anything else. Tobio was never sure about how he felt because everything was messed up inside of him. And with his communication problem, it was making things even less easy in the end. 
When you arrived, you made everything even more complicated for him. He was in first year and it was the same for you. You were both in the same class and, seeing his difficulties with his studies, you proposed to help him. He hesitated for a bit but after Daichi threatened him about the training, Kageyama came back to you to accept your offer. 
At first, it was simply about studying. You wanted to help him and he needed that help more than anyone else. But after a few times, both of you realized that you wanted to spend more time with each other, and not only to work. It was a bit blurry in his head but for you, it was crystal clear ; he was softer than everyone else said he was. 
When Tobio spoke about it to Nishinoya and Tanaka, who were for him the most informed about girls, they almost jumped on him. It was the perfect opportunity ; they were sure that you loved their little Kageyama and it was also sure that he loved you back. But when they told him about it, the setter freaked out. He almost ran away from the gym, as he needed a moment for himself. 
Him? In love? No, it couldn’t be that. He had never felt anything like this towards anyone, so why now? He didn’t have time for this. He needed to train to be a better setter so Hinata could be better too. It was impossible. 
After the “incident” with his senpais, Tobio started to become more distant with you. Saying that he didn’t have time to hang out, or even to study anymore. You weren’t stupid though, and you clearly understood that he was avoiding you. It hurted, you had to admit it. Because you thought that you weren’t the only one with those feelings, but now you weren’t sure about anything anymore. 
Day after day, week after week, you and Kageyama were only seeing each other during class, when he dared even look in your direction. You were an overthinker, and you thought that maybe you had done something wrong, something which hurted him. This is why you decided that you needed to talk to him, even if he didn’t want to. 
He was on his way to the gym for his daily training when you stopped him, in front of the building. He looked at you for a moment before trying to pass next to you without saying anything. But you moved to be in front of him once again. 
“Kageyaman, can we talk? Please?” Your tone was almost pleading, and he had to look away for a minute. He cleared his throat before nodding so slightly that you almost didn’t notice it. You straightened your back, taking a deep breath before speaking. 
“I’m sorry if I did anything which hurted you. It wasn’t my goal, and maybe I’ve been too much for you. So I wanted to say that I’m sorry. It's just that-'' You cutted yourself mid-sentence because of the tears which were threatening to fall from your eyes. You hated yourself for being like this but it was too much, you just wanted things to go better between you two. 
When Tobio realized that you were on the verge of tears, he realized that he had been acting like an idiot the whole time. You weren’t the one who hurted him, it was him all along. He started to panic, because he didn’t know how to react otherwise. He came closer to you, hesitating for a while before grabbing both your hands with his. 
“No, no..! Don’t cry, please! I’m so sorry!” He was so bad with his feelings, so he didn’t know what he should be doing right now. You looked back into his eyes, your own eyes being a bit swollen because of the tears. He quickly looked away when he met your gaze, a slight blush over his cheeks because of the embarrassment. 
“I should be the one apologizing… I messed up, because I was scared,” he started to say, still not looking at you. “Scared because I think I like you…” His voice was lower than usual, and he almost hoped that you didn’t hear and you wouldn’t ask him to repeat. 
You blinked a few times, not sure about what you just heard from him. So you were wrong all along? Well, you couldn’t blame yourself, he was sending mixed messages. But if he said it, you were sure that he wasn’t lying, because Tobio was so bad at lying. You wiped your tears, and a soft smile appeared on your lips. 
“I like you too, Kageyama,” you said, and he finally looked back into your eyes. He cleared his throat before pointing at the building behind you. 
“I need to go, we can-” he wanted to say, but you stopped him with a kiss on his cheek. “Yes, we can talk about it after.” You waved at him, and left without saying anything more. He stayed here for a moment, trying to process what happened, before half of his team jumped on him, running from the door. 
Of course they listened to everything, and they were obviously going to make fun of the poor Kageyama for a long time. But at least, things were better with you and it was the most important in the end. Maybe he was bad with communication, but you were going to help him with that.
Tumblr media
aaaa I hope you like it!! it was so fun to write, I love my boy sm omg
59 notes · View notes
crybabylulu · 3 days
Text
Tumblr media
That Night (smut)
(Sugar mama Lin Beifong x sugar baby reader)
Minors go tf away!
Warnings: men being weird, fingering, drinking, degrading, fucking in a closet, fighting, lots of hickeys
Remember that party Asami invited you and Lin to? Yeah it’s party time!
I had a glass of champagne in my hand while I watched people dance around at Asami’s party. The more I drink my champagne the more I realize I should have just gotten a shot. I’m not the biggest champagne person but I try so hard to be it’s stupid. I got this itching feeling that someone was looking at me but before I could look around Mako came up to me. “Hey.” Mako said. “Hey.” I said back and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. “Have you seen Bolin?” Mako asked. “No I have not.” I said. “Damn, well you wanna take a shot with me?” He offered me a shot glass. “I’d love to.” I said as I took it.
We clinked glasses then tossed our shots back. The liquid burned for a second then the feeling subsided. “I gotta go find Bolin to make sure he’s not doing anything stupid. I’ll come back to check on you in a bit.” Mako said. “You don’t have to check up on me, I'm a big girl.” I told him. “Tell that to chief.” Mako said as he walked away. I shook my head. When I go out by myself Lin sometimes has Mako follow me around which he rather do then paperwork anyways but it’s not like I can’t take care of myself. I started getting that feeling again of someone watching me and it’s bugging me.
I need another shot. I walked off to the mini bar and ordered a shot of cactus juice and then after I took it I said fuck it and ordered another one. Before I could leave the bar some guy blocked my way. “Excuse me.” I said as I tried to get past him. “Why don’t you come dance with me?” The average height man asked. “Actually she’s my dance partner.” Asami said as she grabbed my hand and dragged me away towards the dance floor. “Thank you.” I said. “No problem now, dance with me.” Asami said. I laughed as she held my hand as we danced around each other and on each other.
“I’m surprised you can dance in this dress.” Asami said to me as I danced on her. “What do you mean?” I asked as I moved my hips. “The slits of your dress goes all the way up your thighs at any minute we could have a flash moment.” Asami teased. “Oh shut up I used the tape you invented to make sure this dress don’t move like that.” I laughed. “I’m glad it’s really working, I’m truly a genius.” Asami said. “Indeed you are.” I said. Once the song was over Asami went to go find Korra. I ran into Mako again. “Still no Bolin?” I asked. “He’s in the pool.” Mako told me.
“Oh also you are doing a shitty job at protecting me.” I teased him. “What happened? Are you ok?” Mako asked frantically and started looking over my body for bruises or scratches. I mean he might find a bruise or two because Lin likes to mark me up. “Did someone do this to you?” Mako asked as he poked at my shoulder blade. “That’s a hickey.” I told him. “Oh.” Mako said as he turned me around to face him. “Yeah me and your mom get frisky.” I said. “I don’t need to know about what you and the chief do.” Mako said and shivered in disgust.
I laughed. “Anyways what happened?” Mako asked. “Some dude blocked me from leaving the bar then Asami came to save me.” I said. “I saw you two on the dance floor, you don’t think chief will get mad?” Mako asked. “Why would she?” I asked. “Since she likes to leave marks on you like that and has me follow you around she seems a little possessive don’t you think?” Mako asked. “I suppose so, yes but I don’t think she’ll get upset over me dancing with Asami.” I said. “Anyways stay with me so you don’t get bothered.” Mako said.
Hmmm how about no. “Mako, look , there's a tall buff smart pretty girl over there.” I said and pointed in the opposite direction. “Where?” Mako asked and I took off. I went back to the dance floor. I’m not afraid to dance alone. Is it more fun to have someone to dance with yes but oh well I have to dance alone. As I was dancing I felt someone grab my waist and I wasn’t alarmed at first my brain thought it was Asami or Lin. “Where’s your dance partner?” The male voice asked. Oh hell no! I quickly moved away and turned around.
“Dude what the fuck?” I asked. “Just dance with me.” He said. “No.” I said and tried to walk away from him but he grabbed my wrist. “Hey! Get off.” I snapped and turned back to face him. “It’s just one dance.” He snapped back. Before I could raise my other hand to punch him I was pulled away and then the guy was put on the ground. “You ok?” Mako asked. “Yeah I’m fine.” I told Mako. “You sure?” Lin asked me. “I’m fine baby.” I said. “I’ll get him out of here.” Mako said and dragged him away. “Come with me.” Lin said and we walked off the dance floor. “Where are we going?” I asked.
“Since people wanna dance with my girl I’ll just have to remind them you belong to me.” Lin said. Oh no. Lin dragged me into a closet. She pushed me against the wall and started a passionate make out. Her coming to save me made me horny but now her shoving me into the closet has me even more excited. Anyone could come in and see us but I don’t care. I want them to know, I want them to see, I need them to know I’m her’s. I pulled away. “You gonna keep making out with me or are you gonna remind everyone who I belong to?” I asked. Lin immediately attacked my neck.
I leaned my head back so she could have more access to my neck. “Lin please more.” I begged her. “Don’t be an impatient brat.” Lin growled. “Please.” I begged. Lin turned me around and lifted up my dress. I wasn’t wearing any shorts, it was just a dark red thong with a heart chain under my long dress. Lin smacked my ass and I let out a moan. “Lin.” I whined. She nibbled on my ear and smacked my ass over and over. God this feels so good. Lin pulled down my panties and started to circle my clit. “You’re wet just from me spanking you?” Lin asked.
“Yes, I love when you spank me.” I whined. Lin turned me to face her and pulled down my dress to pull out my breast. She nipped my left nipple and I gasped. She was gonna leave marks all over my tits. “Lin please more.” I begged. Lin slipped two fingers inside of me stretching me out and my back arched. “Yes, more baby more.” I whined. She curled her fingers and did a come here motion. “Fuck keep doing that.” I moan out. “You’re all mine aren’t you?” Lin whispered in my ear. “Yes I’m all yours!” I cried out. Her fingers feel so good inside of me. “You’re sure?” Lin asked.
“Yes baby I’m yours.” I moaned. “I thought you’d be Asami’s the way you were dancing on her.” Lin growled and rubbed my clit with her other hand. “No Lin. I’m yours all fucking yours! I belong to you!” I cried out. I guess Mako was right. “That’s right you belong to me.” Lin said. My legs were shaking and ready to give out. “Oh god please chief I’m close.” I whined as I felt a familiar tightness building in my belly. “When you cum you better scream my name.” Lin commanded. I nodded my head and the closer I got to tipping over the edge I kept saying her name over and over again.
“Do you think you can take another finger?” Lin asked. My eyes widened. “I c-can try.” I said unsurely. “Good girl.” Lin said and I felt her add a third finger. I gripped Lin’s shoulders. “Fuck chief!” I cried out. “Your tight pussy is swallowing my fingers up so well baby girl.” Lin cooed. We’ve never done this before but it feels so fucking good and I can feel my juices leaking down my thighs. “I’m so close.” I told her. “Cum for me baby you can do it.” Lin said, pumping her fingers faster. “I’m all yours Lin, I belong to you, I’m yours. I don’t want anyone but you,” I grabbed Lin’s face so she could look at me as I declared her ownership over me.
I could tell her eyes were full of lust but there’s something else there but I had no time to decipher what it was because Lin smashed her lips against mine. Lin plunged her tongue in my mouth and I didn’t even put up a fight. I let her do whatever she wanted to me. As Lin slowly pulled away I felt light headed. “You’re right you’re mine, you belong to me, there will be no one that touches you the way I do.” Lin groaned. Her words pushed me over the edge. “Lin!” I cried out as I orgasmed.
Lin fingered me through as my whole body shook. “Fuck Beifong.” I sighed out. “You ok?” Lin asked. I nodded my head. “You sure?” Lin asked. “Yes baby I’m fine.” I said. “Good.” Lin said as she pulled out her fingers and I put them in my mouth. I sucked them clean for her. “Let’s get out of here.” Lin said. “No, I wanna keep dancing.” I whined. “One more dance then we go.” Lin said as she helped me put on my panties. “You fucked up the tape.” I sighed. “What do you mean?” Lin asked. “There was tape that I put on the strings of my panties to help keep my dress from moving all over the place.” I told her.
“You’ll be fine.” Lin said. I nodded and we exited the closet together. Before we made it all the way back to the party Lin stopped me. “What’s wrong?” I asked and turned to look at her. Lin opened her mouth but then stopped. “Where the hell have you two been? Are you ok?” Kya asked coming up to us. “I was a little shaken up about what happened earlier.” I said. “Aww Linny, look at you taking care of your girlfriend. How romantic.” Kya teased. “Kya don’t you have single woman to mingle with?” Lin asked. “No need to be hostile Linny, but are you really ok?” Kya asked me.
“Yes I’m fine.” I said. “Oh and by the way Mako got into a fight with that guy.” Kya said. “Is Mako ok?” I asked. “Of course he’s ok.” Lin said. “Lin knows her precious son can handle himself but yes he’s ok.” Kya said. Lin rolled her eyes. Kya’s eyes widened. “What?�� I asked. “Y’all are nasty! All those hickeys.” Kya gasped. “Oh hush Kya.” Lin said. Kya and I laughed. I was happy that the hickeys were seen. This is what we wanted. We walked back to the party and I got to dance with Lin for a little bit. Lin ran her hands over my body as we danced.
34 notes · View notes
Thank you for your service smol o7 this game has been on my thoughts 24/7 lol so it’s nice to see someone writing for it!!
I was hoping I could request some jealousy headcanons about the ghouls being pouty MC is hanging out with others so much because of their missions with other houses. In particular I was hoping for my boy Haku (I know we don’t have a main chapter for him yet but he did have those two chunks of screen time—if he’s too difficult because of not enough info don’t worry about it then!); as well as maybe Jin, Luca and whoever else you’d like!
Thanks again~
Just like another ask i got, I'm gonna write Haku based on the vibe I got from him. This could be proven entirely inaccurate in the later game and I am okay with that lol. I'm gonna round it to an even four characters. All these will be before any relationship actually happens. Like there's a crush there but no one has said anything yet.
And thank YOU for sending in a request and enjoying!
Be aware! These will contain minor spoilers for episode 3!
JIN KAMURAI
I feel like silver spoon Jin has no experience with certain types of jealousy. Materialistic jealousy? Doesn't know her. But when he heard how close MC had been getting with some of those Vagastrom thugs? Oh it made his blood boil.
At first I'm sure he thought it was because on of his orders was being defied. But that feeling only got stronger when MC was finished with Vagastrom and moved onto Jabberwok.
Good luck to Tohma because mans here does not know what to do about these emotions. This is one of those problems that can't be fixed with money and he is NOT happy about it. He goes back to brooding in his room for a while to think things through.
He will not tolerate any disrespect from any theories that the Frostheim gossip elite have. But when he noticed the like dove flying in the direction of MC'S dorm, things suddenly started to click in his head.
LUCAS ERRANT "LUCA"
Our boy here is another one who isn't necessarily familiar with jealousy. Its for similar reasons of, he comes from a well off family, but different in the way he was raised and things he's been through as a little kid.
He's glad to see MC making more friends and making possible progress on breaking their curse, at first. When they get to Jabberwok however, he hears from Kaito that their vice captain Towa is a bit of (how Kaito put it), "a fucking weirdo", which gives him some pause.
When Kaito came running up to Luca showing him a WickChat post about MC having a possible boyfriend (its false, its just Towa being affectionate and someone saw). He feels his heart sink a little bit
He made a mental note to text MC later to ask about it and get all the information he could about their relationship and about the Jabberwock students. He promised to protect MC not matter what. Hopefully they could explain the strange twist in his chest while they talked too.
ALAN MIDO
He doesn't really get jealous. Period.
I think he's the kind of guy to know how strong he is, he knows his reputation. He's tech hopeless, not a moron. So just being around him can scare off people from getting too close to MC while he's around.
He himself overheard about MC having a possible boyfriend (same post from Luca's) from Leo telling Sho. He didn't pay any real mind to it until he heard Leo mention how affectionate they were.
That's the one thing he gets jealous about. He's a bit more aware of his feelings than people might think, so he knows he has a crush on MC. He just hasn't had the time to tell them that.
The rumor takes some wind out of Alan's sails for sure. He's more likely to believe that MC would pick someone else over him since I think he'd be more hesitant on something like physical affection.
He knows his strength and he knows MC'S ability, he would be too afraid that he'd lose control and do something else he might regret, so out of everyone on this list. I think Alan would be the one to take longer to confess because of jealousy and his insecurities.
HAKU KUSANAGI
I don't remember if it's explicitly said anywhere (my memory sucks butt I'm sorry) but he gives older sibling energy with how he cleaned up after Taiga in the prologue. So I KNOW he's been worried about MC since they last saw eachother.
He was at least somewhat relieved when he found them hanging out with the Frostheim second years, but there was a pang in his he couldn't quite place. He chalked it up to just being a worrywart and left it alone.
But when he heard that MC had gone missing in episode 3, he was READY to jump in to go help the search and rescue team. His heart was racing and he was suddenly confronted with feelings that were coming out of left field (no they weren't)
When MC returns back safely, Haku has half a mind to go fight with the professor Hyde about sending the very human honor student on such dangerous missions. He keeps a much closer eye on them from now on and with his status as an heir to (what i assume) is a beloved shrine, he tries to request that MC be sent to work with Hotarubi next.
20 notes · View notes
natsuki208 · 2 days
Text
I LOVE Eremika! But it does have its flaws.
I may not be the only Eremika shipper who still sees the slight problems about either their relationship or story around them in general, but I’m going to talk about it anyway.
(Warning! Slight spoilers for my friend)
There are two main problems people have with this ship - Eren barely showing signs that he loves Mikasa romantically and Mikasa’s love for Eren coming off as obsessive.
Yes, Eren may have shown less interest in Mikasa in the beginning but hey, he was still only a teen focussing heavily on his goals. At least starting in season 2, he stopped yelling at her whenever she tried to care for him, that’s a start. I’ll agree there should’ve been more signals that he grew some feelings for her overtime; especially before all the season 4 crap or maybe not go down that ‘evil’ path at all if you ask me.
As for Mikasa, *sigh* she had so much more potential to be MORE than just her love for Eren. Like, she’s already shown to be strong next to Levi, and some extra interactions with the other characters would’ve been nice as well (a lot of them were cut from the manga for the anime). I’d tone her obsession down a bit and maybe give her an actual goal in her life other than protect Eren, but still have those moments where she chats to him about their said futures.
One more thing: I think the biggest flaw that sets a lot of people off was they were first introduced living in the same house. This gave off that they were siblings at first, and that leaves a weird taste in my mouth if that makes sense. Why didn’t they just gradually reveal in the first episode that she’s not related to the Jaeger’s, like saying her last name or bringing up what happened that night at the cabin. Anything to make it more clear for the audience.
After all that, why do I still ship them? That’s the keyword: potential. Plus the brief moments they did had together before S4 really tug at my heartstrings, if only we could’ve seen that more along with a more believable transition of their romantic feelings for one another (mainly on Eren’s part). I love them a lot, but it’s wrong to ignore the flaws with their story and I’ll never tire of saying they deserved soo much better than what their story gave. 🗝🧣
(hopefully we can agree that S4 ruined them)
Tumblr media
23 notes · View notes
Text
me whenever someone gives me unsolicited opinions about myself:
Tumblr media
#thinking about the time a friend of mine did this#and she does this a lot bc she's older and ofc sees herself as 'more knowledgeable' or w/e#which hey sometimes she is#mostly i take her opinions with a grain of salt but she said something to me recently that just#idk it rubbed me the wrong way. and i keep thinking about it.#ider what we were talking about but somehow we got on the subject of romantic relationships#and i basically said i'm not opposed to one but i'm NOT looking. like at ALL. not even a little bit.#but if something happens someday great!#she proceeds to tell me literally right after i say this#that i should work on my appearance then because i'm 'a little plain'. not ugly or anything just...plain.#which hey i know already btw and it doesn't really bother me#i wear make up and am not against it at all. i think it's amazing to see what people can do with it tbh.#and if people wanna wear it i'm all for it#i personally don't like the way it feels on my skin so i use as little as possible#just enough to cover things like my acne scars or other imperfections that i feel self conscious about#i'd love to get to a point where i feel comfortable NOT wearing make up actually#and that's not even to say that i'd NEVER get dolled up or whatever#it's just not something i enjoy doing on a regular basis ya know?#and honestly? any future partner i have should be aware of that bc you're gonna get plain ol' non-makeup-wearing me 99% of the time#and if that's a problem with them then i don't even wanna waste my time on them#so yeah when she said this to me i was annoyed#bc fr wtf does that have to do with me not looking for a partner??? lol#*sigh* ik she was probably just trying to help in her own way but like#just don't k? k.#/rant#sorry i had to get that out somewhere lmao#it's been driving me crazy#ignore me
7 notes · View notes
ei-mugi · 3 months
Text
im not a even a fan of the "hellaverse" but i have seen helluva boss and with all the twitter uproar over the hazbin ep4 leaks i went and found a reaction video of the full ep on yt so i could see how bad it really was and. jesus christ. theres certainly analysis of the visuals that could be had regarding the original criticisms but for me the episode was more like... 1. angel dust is the exact same character as fizzarolli 2. hellaverse is never going to break away from writing its characters like a whump fic is it and 3. this is an absolutely horrible portrayal of sex workers. vivienne pleaseeeee get your head out of the yaoi bin and remind yourself of like. women and misogyny. and stop writing all your sex worker/sexually abused (notice how that is grouped together) characters in the same way. sex workers arent all victims who need to be saved from their jobs
#sorry i just already had a ton of thoughts on how poorly i thought fizzarolli was written#half for the writers riding too much on whump standards and thus ignoring the glaring fundamental issues in his life#and then blaming all of his problems on being cutely insecure#but also in the like. misogyny. i get it we fandomers like yaoi but please. HOW could you look at those 2 women villains#in s2e7 and decide that was okay. that was egregious#ive just been thinking about this shit way too much and i kind of want to dump a proper analysis of it but also. sigh.#do i REALLY want to be blogging about hazbin and helluva#then again i also feel the need to say stuff because im willing to bet that anyone on YT whos making hellaverse analysis#isnt familiar with whump and like. as someone who enjoys whump i think it should be required reading for understanding how narratives like#fizzarollis are constructed#because there are very obvious tropes and character archetypes being taken directly from whump-style stuff and it is NOT good in this mediu#as much as i enjoy a bit of catharsis you cant just carry over the same stuff from it and expect your audience to suspend their disbelief i#the same way. because once you start thinking about the actual politics and personal implications of it...#well. you end up with a poorly written show with poorly written characters that inadvertently end up being misogynistic#sigh. if someone wants me to i can share my thoughts on this#i dont entirely hate the hellaverse im more ambivalent on it i guess. i did like some parts of it but as a whole its not my thing#i am someone who enjoys thinking about this stuff and doing some casual textual analysis though#so i cant help thinking about this stuff when watching or reading anything
2 notes · View notes
talkorsomething · 1 month
Text
Too [insert adjective here] for guard ...................
Well, it's only half related.
We "hit a pothole", "had a slipup", whatever you want to call it — sunday. Aka: for the sake of my sanity we are not labeling it a relapse but good god does it feel as though I have invited the demons back in.
I know why, but I don't really know why. Because, I mean... I never have, to begin with. So: when I decided i was doing it sunday, i accepted it. "Let it happen", as someone would probably say to me. It's not...
I've been thinking about it for a while now. It's like anything - it comes and goes, a few times a year, and no matter what, I always ignore it.
Except, maybe there's something I'm not paying attention to? Or, ignoring, is the better word for it?
Of course it would be the one thing I have happening in my life.
November, I was burnt out for unrelated reasons. It was a lot to take in. That made sense. Now? ... why now?
There's not really any pressure on me. Yes, I have to do things, yes, it will be noticed if they're bad, but ...... it's not important. We don't spend time on it. I'm coming back next year, but it might be at the cost of ... all of this. I think it's progress. I haven't touched my guitar in any serious capacity in over a year. I think it's progress.
I don't take compliments well. I can't tell if that's why I don't get them, but I'm not being corrected much either. Only when I drift too far from what the work is supposed to be, only after weeks of it going, I can only assume, unnoticed. I keep getting stuck.
...push it back down.
Telling me I'm doing good isn't telling me what I know I have to be getting wrong. I could take it, at the cost of... all of this. I'm anticipating, and I know it can come. This is not where I was when I started.
It's been said, I haven't been told, that not starting it means you're more of a burden, by making the other person have to do it first. I know that. I do. And still it doesn't help. I'm not drowning. It wasn't an accident, but it wasn't planned, either. I don't know you.
I don't know you.
I'm not a good person. I'm not a nice person. Every week I tell myself this is really it, and every week I come back, and ... what? Forget I ever said anything? Forget we're not friends?
Well, we're not, huh? Nobody is, with me. What you see I swear you misunderstand. You don't ask. If you do, well, I can't answer. We're at an impasse.
It's not even my fault we didn't make it. I shouldn't feel like this over nothing. I don't do anything. You will, correctly, not let me do anything, because potential doesn't matter if you can't back it up. If you won't back it up. I let things happen to me.
I don't even feel better. And, actually, ironically, i think i know what would let me feel better. If I can't be upset with anyone else, at least I can be with myself.
... but, well, not even that. Your heart in my hands, but I mean it diegetically. And metaphorically. I hate putting myself out there, I hate having to actually perform, and yet every time, no matter what, I do it. I'm fine. I only cared at the start, and even then not very.
I don't feel anything. Not a lot, anyways. I don't let it happen. I can't. I don't know what it'll mean if I start being honest with myself.
...
I've pulled myself out of this before. A few times, now. Different circumstances, but I've done it all the same. Seasonal depression notwithstanding.
I'm only here because I did things I was scared to. And still, I'm the same. No progress made. The only way out is to do it again but I feel like I can't. I can't.
Will someone just let me say that?
Will someone just fucking help for once?
#sh tw#(implied - i know i didnt actually say it in the post but yes i did c** myself sunday)#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#im cursed with being a bit too self aware so#i think its compounded by my nepotism hire ... not letting me do my nepotism hire things#(for legal reasons i cannot say)#and then to add to that not letting me do anything I probably COULD actually do given slightly more instruction (at guard)#its just ... im a very angry person actually . except right now thats because im not EATING RIGHT EITHER#BECAUSE ALL OF MY PROBLEMS ARE COMBINING INTO ONE BIG INTERCONNECTED PROBLEM#back to my point.#guard instructors decided that for my first year i will not do anything cool because i'm not able to learn in about 2 seconds flat#[read: get very upset very quickly when i get things wrong and then . cant do them because im trying not to have a breakdown over]#[something REALLY STUPID like NOT BEING ABLE TO DO A SIMPLE TURN WHILE MOVING WITH THE FLAG]#so like okay. i get it okay. i'm not good at this. could you at least TELL ME i suck so i can feel justified about feeling bad about it.#could you just fucking tell me this isn't a guard where you can show up with no experience. could you do me a real solid and tell me that.#i dont know maybe the real sign it wasnt for me was when i was seriously considering not turning up for the second 'audition'#really i just hate how much he yells at us. not even at ME because i do so little there is no room to fuck it up. just at everyone else .#it doesn't motivate me to come back but i NEED 'friends' so bad and i love performing so now i just get anxious enough that i cant eat ..#.. before going to rehearsal. which is stupid. because i've done it a million times before.#......#i'm just.... everyone says he isn't actually that bad. & he used to be worse. so it really is just me.#it's just me being oversensitive. because i've never had any REAL experience in ... just about anything#so; yes. it IS on me how I feel and obviously how I react. and I keep pushing it down because it's stupid; really; to still feel this way.#anyways. our last weekend without a competition is this very weekend#so you'll never guess who's having a REALLY FUCKING HARD TIME trying to practice#i'm like this close to going to bed early and without having done the dance warmup for the third day in a row.#лёва there is no TIME why are you STILL NOT PRACTICING for the love of god get it together#(oh also when i say 'friends' in quotes it is because i desparately want to believe we're friends but they dont even talk to me really)#(and because im not even IN most of the show theres not much to bond over. literally like i have everything down Decent enough (apparently)#so theres not even any 'i will help u with this toss' team bonding. no shared moment of we are all out of breath because i DONT DO ANYTHING
0 notes
teaboot · 11 days
Text
This is gonna sound rather conceited but I feel like it highlights an issue we have in Art.
I'm good at art. I've never had a hard time making art. I started using crayons before I could walk. Painting, Beadwork, sculpture, sketching, stippling, whatever- once I have a feel for the material, it doesn't take long to start doing what I want with it. It's been a common theme my whole life.
(Y contrast I'm awful at things like dancing, performance, sports, etc- in all things there is balance, right?)
Now, I've taught myself to use so many artistic mediums now that I KNOW how to most efficiently integrate them into the brain database. Once you really *understand* a material, it's much like memorizing the layout of your house, or flexing a muscle, or something in-between- it becomes PART of your brain in a way I cant quite articulate. But to get there involves just fucking around for a bit doing nothing in particular.
And I've found, especially in group settings, that nobody seems to be able to see you make something badly and leave you alone. Even if you say you're fine, you don't want help, you're happy, you're having fun, it's fine, they gotta ride your ass and hover.
I was at a class the other day for something I hadn't done before. The medium was one I've never used, so once the instructor told us the basics I started experimenting with weight, gravity, texture, viscosity, saturation, temperature, etc. The instructor had given enough info to know what was dangerous and what was safe, and beyond that I just wanted to absorb what I could about it.
And no insult to the instructor, but they kept checking in. Which was fine the first few times.
But then, without asking me what I was trying to do, started giving tips. That I told them I was grateful for but didn't really need just yet. If I had a question, I'd ask.
But they kept coming over. And touching my shit. And manipulating my project. And touching my hands. And using my tools. Without fucking asking.
And this happens every time. EVERY TIME. And by now I know the best way to get them to fuck off is to make something way beyond their expectations so they know I'm capable, then go back to doing what I want.
So I did. I wanted to keep having fun and learning, but instead I made something beautiful that I really didn't want to make, and wasted my time, and really didn't learn what I wanted to learn at all. I knew the formula to create a beautiful thing, so I followed that formula the same way I have a hundred times before, and didn't get to try anything spontaneous or ugly or exciting, just so I could be left alone.
And I know when I was a kid, I was aware aware people saw me puttering alone on something ugly assumed I had a special issue and treated me like I was stupid because of that. (I was neurodivergent.) And at at time I knew that I could do a neat trick for them like a trained pony and they'd go, "Oh, surely they aren't defective if they can do something like that!" And piss off.
But what if I hadn't known how to do that?
What if I hadn't been talented, or "special"?
What if I'd been just any other average kid trying to learn, and I couldn't pop something pretty out of my ass to get them off my back?
My problem my whole life has been that I haven't been allowed to make anything ugly in peace. I'm capable of beauty, so I have to make beauty, or get stepped on. And once people see what I can do, they get loud about it. "Look at this! Look what they did! We all know who the best is, don't we?". And that used to feel good, but it's tiring.
And how many people like me just wanted to play? Just wanted to have fun and experiment? Who were having fun with no goal in mind, or just took longer to learn, who gave up because of all the obnoxious helpers breathing down their neck with no way to shake them off?
How many of us are made to feel defective because we aren't doing things beautifully?
I have a lovely piece of art I didn't want to make.
I think I'm gonna frame it.*
(*I think I'm gonna burn it in my yard.)
5K notes · View notes
dauntlessallure · 1 month
Text
𖤐 ⸝⸝ ˚ ┊ BANDS A MAKE HER DANCE ⋆
Tumblr media
〝 ⠀ ݁⠀𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨 , 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐨 , 𝐧𝐚��𝐚𝐦𝐢 , & 𝐭𝐨𝐣𝐢 ❜ ⠀݁
Tumblr media
【 SYNOPSIS 】— giving the jjk!men a show.
【 CONTENTS 】— stripper!reader , implied smut , fem-bodied reader , dryhumping , degradation, groping , grinding , dirty talk , consensual non consent ( for context reasons lol ) , semi established relationship + sugar daddy ( w/ nanami ) , reader is a bit of a s l u t aren’t we all though ? , kissing , daddy kink ( in toji & nanami’s ) , spanking , MDNI + any other missing tags .ᐟ
【 PAIRING 】— jjk!men x stripper!reader
【 WORD COUNT 】— 1k
Tumblr media
⠀ ̽ ⠀ ᝰ✍︎ ﹐⠀/⠀ ❝ ⠀ 𝔄𝗗𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗜𝗦𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 𝔑𝗢𝗧𝗘 . . .
im STILL working on boxer!toji but for now , imma let y’all EAT. :) i had this plot bunny in my brain for a while so i went ahead and finished it up. reblogs are appreciated <3. comment to join the tag list. this work is not yet proof read.
Tumblr media
— ❥ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔
gojo is well . . gojo , if the man has an excuse to go to the local stripclub ? best believe that man is going to be there in a heartbeat. he just wants to see if you’re working tonight, satoru was your favorite client after all. he was never stingy with his money but better yet , there was something about him that just made you want to bend the rules of your own contract just a little. maybe it was all the pretty little names he’d call you everytime you’d give him a dance, or maybe it’s the way your slowly grinding your hips down onto his growing erection. fuck — you were driving him crazy. “ shiiiiiit princess , you’re making me hard and you’ve just bearly started. “ gojo wanted to just grab you & pin you to the wall of the private room you two were in. “ mmhm , i can feel it. but remember ~ “ you’d begin to move your hips in slow - rhythmic circles against his lap, the feeling of the restricted fabric pressing itself up into your barely clothed cunt was really testing your own patience. “ no touching satoru, you’ll have to pay extra for that. “ satoru whined softly, lightly pressing his hips up against your ass as he reached for his wallet. “ fuck all that , you can drain my bank account fucking dry for all i care. “ the white haired man basically threw all the cash in his wallet which was a lot to the small table to his left before digging his fingertips into the flesh of your hips , pulling you back onto his lap in one swift motion making your head spin. “ think you can handle all of me baby ? hm ? tell me. “ satoru purred against the skin of your neck. you were definitely in for it tonight.
— ❥ 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔
today was suguru’s birthday, and what better way to celebrate than being pulled to a strip club by his closest friends. geto had never been , though he’s heard all about it from gojo’s loud mouth. all of the other dancers were beautiful , geto wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep his composer until his eyes landed on you. you were relatively new to being an exotic dancer but you’d have no problem grabbing almost anyone’s attention when they stumbled into your sight. “ don’t be a wuss man , go ask her for a dance. “ gojo pushed on suguru’s shoulder which made geto shoot satoru a glare. but before geto could do anything , you’d be the one who makes a move first. grabbing onto his hand, geto’s gaze shoots down at you almost in shock. “ sorry to interrupt you , but a special someone has told me it’s your birthday. looks like you’ll be getting a private dance from me tonight. “ suguru’s expression was priceless. he looked back at gojo , gojo shrugged. “ wasn’t me man. “ that’s when shoko popped her head out from behind satoru. “ oh ! yeah , have fun geto. “ shoko did this ??!! suguru expected this type of thing from satoru but from shoko ?! , geto blinked at shoko before being pulled away by you. five minutes into the private session and suguru was hard as a rock which you couldn’t help but to chuckle at. he was attractive , long hair that you just wanted to sink your fingers into. “ someone’s getting excited. “ you chuckle out as you placed both hands onto his thighs, your tits on full display for geto to stare at. geto felt like he was gonna lose it, he couldn’t possibly take it. “ f— . . fuck me. “ was the only thing suguru could mutter out as he continued to watch you dance.
— ❥ 𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎
unlike both suguru and the headache that is gojo , nanami doesn’t need stripclubs. even though yours and nanami’s sensual relationship did spark from a local gentlemen’s club , you’ve left that lifestyle behind long ago. you’ve established a very strong connection with nanami since then, even making more money now working for nanami privately. he’s vowed to keep you happy by spoiling you beyond oblivion. you were so grateful for kento , grateful enough to be standing in front of him wearing the brand new lingerie set he had custom made just for you. nanami kept a hard gaze on your figure as he raised his finger up and twirling it in a circular motion, signaling for you to spin for him. you slowly spun around allowing kento to get a good look, the color of the lingerie made your complexion pop while the lacy material hugged the curves of both your ass and your tits to perfection. nanami’s never seen a sight so beautiful. “ do you like it ? “ he questioned , patting his thigh. you’d nod quickly, getting a good look at yourself in the full body mirror to your left. “ i love it , thank you daddy. “ kento smiled. “ c’mere , i wanna see my perfect baby up close. “ you waltzed your way over to nanami , turning around to place yourself onto nanami’s lap , grinding yourself on his thighs. he immediately groaned followed by a small chuckle, placing a few chaste kisses along your shoulder while his large hands began to rub over the skin of your tummy “ hm , daddy thinks you look gorgeous but i’d rather see you uncovered for now. is that okay ? “ you nodded. RIIIIIIP. he’s done tore the fabric off of your body. “ nanami ! “ , “ don’t worry , i’ll get you more. “
— ❥ 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎
let’s be honest , this man spends every pretty penny he’s got at the stripclub. it’s the toji thing to do. especially spending everything he’s got just to get a private dance from you. toji quickly became one of your regular clients as he pretty much came in weekly to see you. over the course of a couple of months, you & toji began to take your private sessions up to the next level. you two just couldn’t get enough of each other, you dancing around and shaking your ass for him just wasn’t enough. toji now has you on his lap , his tongue lodging itself into your warm mouth. you were squirming under his touch , your now soaked underwear was making a wet spot on his pants while you ground on him. toji pulled back from the kiss only to laugh at how wet you’ve gotten, only making him harder. “ look at cha , makin’ a mess on me & i haven’t even got ya naked yet. “ his voice alone could make you gush all over him even more, toji let his hand smack across the plush of your ass. “ let me guess , you want more huh ? i should’ve known you were a dirty fuckin’ slut. “ you gasped as toji wrapped his arms around the small of your waist and pressed your weight down onto his throbbing length through his pants, “ t-toji ! “ a small whimper leaving your lips as more of your arousal seeped through the rough fabric. “ aht , aht , that’s not my name. . tell me whatcha want baby. “ how humiliating, but you loved everything about it. “ d—daddy .ᐟ i wanna feel you inside. “ toji chuckled before releasing his grip from around your waist, tapping your thigh as a sign for you to stand up. “ atta girl , now the panties . . lose em. “
Tumblr media
ׂ⠀〝⠀⠀.. ⠀ ©dauntlessallure 24’ — please do not steal , publish , or post my work elsewhere or credit as your own .ᐟ
2K notes · View notes
I've been such a negative nancy around here today I'm so sorry. I'm not usually like this. I am going to try a different way of making body tolerable. I'm so sleepy I'm I didn't sleep at all.
0 notes
runa-falls · 9 months
Note
I saw that you think Miguel is a thigh man 😩 can I request him x reader who's thighs clap when they run or so some type of activities. I got that problem sadly 😵‍💫😮‍💨
yes, of course!! i love talking ab our thigh fucker ;^)
cw: body insecurities, thigh chafing (yeouch), fluffy reassurances, small bit of smut (OK IM SORRY 😳 i didn't see that coming [yes i did.]), just oral and uh, a bit of marking, not proof read!!
---
you've never enjoyed prolonged physical activity: running, swimming, biking, etc, because you hated the way your thighs would slide against each other; uncomfortably chafing your skin and making noticeable sounds.
so when miguel proposed a hike for your weekly date, you were hesitant to agree. unfortunately, he's very good at persuading you...
that's how you found yourself on a narrow trial shrouded with trees, taking slow, cautious steps as you attempt to keep your thighs from touching as much as usual.
of course, it only helped so much. your inner thighs were still chafing and getting sore, but you try to conceal your pain as much as possible, too embarrassed to mention anything to miguel.
though your boyfriend is the most loving and accepting man you've ever met, you still haven't told him of your insecurity. you're afraid that once you mention something to him, he'll notice your thighs even more.
miguel is pacing himself, making sure to slow down with you so he doesn't leave you behind (he does this hike all the time). he adjusts his baseball cap, making sure his wild curls are smooshed down as he watches you walk toward him.
you look beautiful today. you always look beautiful. but there's something about see you in this condition that make him twitch in his shorts.
he loves the way your chest heaves as you take deep breaths, your tits pressing desperately against the thin fabric. how droplets of sweat roll over the contours of your cleavage, outlining what he wants to see the most. and how your leggings look like they were painted on, completely revealing the overwhelming softness of your thighs and how they press so sweetly together.
he can barely take his eyes off of you.
but he can't help but notice how odd you're acting too.
he's perplexed as to why you're taking such big steps and moving like you'd rather be anywhere but there, with him. why your face is tense, yet completely blank at the same time.
there's clearly something wrong, but you've been silent this whole hike.
"baby, you doing alright?" you seem to be lost in your thoughts as you stare down at your dirt-scuffed sneakers, you don't even notice he's stopped in front of you. he calls out to you again, "babe?"
"hm?" you look up, pausing your unnatural movements to give your legs a rest, "oh, yeah...i'm fine" you attempt a smile, but even you can tell it looks fake and performative. his eyes bloom with concern as he notices how your legs are shaking under you.
"what's going on, sweetheart? are you hurt?"
"no...it's just," you look away, still apprehensive to mention anything.
he pushes, hand reaching for yours, "just what?"
"i-my thighs are chafing..." you say softly, looking back at him. he's frowning. "b-but i can keep going!" you start walking again, willing yourself to continue even though it hurts.
"baby, wait," he stops you, "don't hurt yourself. i didn't realize you were having trouble this whole time."
you shrug, "it's ok, i'm used to it."
"sweetheart, come here." he has his back turned towards you, coaxing you over to him. "get on."
"get on?"
"i'll carry you back to the car."
"no! you don't have to--"
"i want to." he interrupts, "then when we get home, we'll take a nice bath and get you all patched up."
"what about the rest of the trail?"
"we can just get our work out in at home..."
---
you sigh as warm water washes over the inflamed skin of your inner thighs. it stings sharply, but the pain feels oddly satisfying, especially as miguel thoroughly lathers shampoo in your hair.
"feel better?"
you hum, eyes closing as his fingers attentively massage your scalp.
"why didn't you tell me that you were hurting earlier?"
"i dunno, it just wasn't that big of a deal, mig."
"it was. you were barely able to sit without your hands between your thighs."
you snort, "i thought you liked it when i do that."
you yelp when you feel him tug sharply at your hair. "you know what i meant." he growled, clearly unhappy you're trying to avoid the subject.
"it's embarrassing."
"what's embarrassing?" his hands start to cup water onto your head, washing the suds from your hair until you're squeaky clean.
"my thighs." his movements stop suddenly.
"what about them?"
"they're...too big."
"too big?" he genuinely sounds baffled, almost scoffing in disbelief.
"yeah, they're always touching and they make this...clapping sound when i do certain physical movements..."
"so?"
"so?" you turn your head to look at him, questioning eyes meeting his scarlet stare. his red irises are mere slivers with how blown out his pupils are, heavy with lust.
"yeah, so what?"
"so...i don't like them." you voice is small as you look at him shyly, cheeks blooming with heat under the stringiness of your wet hair.
"well i love them."
---
miguel presses gentle and sweet kisses over your tender skin, relieving all the pain from your chafed inner thighs with just a touch of his lips. your legs are hooked over his shoulders as he makes his way up your body.
the prominent shape of his fangs press against his top lip as his sharp maroon stare fixes right at the apex of your thighs. you can tell he's holding himself back by the way his fingers grip bruises into the tops of your legs.
"baby, you have no idea," he takes a deep breath, eyes closed as his nose nuzzles at your inner thigh, "how fucking perfect you are."
"mig, please!"
he smiles cloyingly, letting you watch his fangs retract before he dips his head closer to your center. he wouldn't want to hurt you...
he locks eyes with you when he experimentally slips his tongue through your soaking lips, only giving you enough attention to keep you buzzing. he's delicately laving against you, feeling you tense and pant under him as he slowly builds up your pleasure.
a haze of lust instantly clouds over his darkened eyes and you watch as he gets lost in the taste of you. he pushes in deeper, tongue fucking you, slurping and sucking, while spilling muffled groans over your pulsing cunt as your thighs begin to tighten around him.
he flicks over your aching clit, drinking in your whimpers, moans, and cries as he teases you, pulling back every so often until you bury your hand into his curls and force him down onto you.
you're nearly suffocating him with your thighs when he start suckling you into his mouth, muscles trembling against him as you grow closer to the edge, and he loves it.
his silky lips and slick tongue push you straight off the edge. you hold on to him as your body writhes with white hot pleasure, hand in his hair and thighs around his head. you can barely hear the muffled groans he makes from how lost in ecstasy you are.
but he groans, and grunts, and then freezes.
"did i just..." he unwraps your legs from around him and sits up, tugging his briefs down in disbelief. your bleary eyes open, eyes glazed and unfocused from the intensity of your orgasm. "shit."
you look down and are graced with a beautiful mess that drips from his cock and the black fabric of his boxers.
you can't help the amused smile that spreads over your lips, "you need some help cleaning that up?"
4K notes · View notes
ranhaitanisgf · 3 months
Note
Helloo!!! could you write a oneshot about ran dating fem!reader and she is like a total good girl i mean like good grades, a teachers pet and always listents to her parents.
Hope you have a good day you are one of my favourite writers<3<3
Tumblr media
little miss rule follower
synopsis: moments w/ ran dating his fem!reader who is a rule follower
Tumblr media
☆ a/n ˎˊ˗ hiii thank you for requesting!! :3 +thank you for the message you are so sweet !! im so glad you enjoy my writings :D i wanted to include a lot of diff moments w this idea, so i did a little collection of mini oneshots, i hope thats alright ! i hope you all have an amazing and gorgeous and fabulous day & enjoy !! xoxo
☆ characters ˎˊ˗ ran haitani x fem!reader
☆ wc ˎˊ˗ 1.8k+
masterlist
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
“y’know, it would’ve been a lot faster if i’d just driven you home, right?” ran suddenly asked, his voice laced with playfulness. “is it just that you want to spend more time with me~?” 
“hm? you know i’m not going to show up at home on the back of a motorbike, ran.” you rolled your eyes at his teasing, jokingly trying to pull your hand from his. he frowned at the action, lacing your fingers together and keeping your hand in a firmer grip. 
“you don’t want to be close to me? you don’t want to be able to hold me all you want? maybe even feel my abs-?” 
“no.” 
“...ouch. that one really hurt, sweets.” you giggled at his crestfallen expression, finding it rather cute as he pouted, side eyeing you to see your reaction. his jaw dropped dramatically when he saw your face. “you’re laughing?! wow, this really is a cruel world!” 
“yeah yeah, the world is sooo evil to you, right?” you teased, your sarcasm evident as you laughed at him. 
“yes, it really is!” he exclaimed, letting go of your hand and suddenly wrapping his long arms around your shoulders, putting his full weight on you. “(y/n), you understand, right?!”
“gah! r-ran! get offa me, you’re so heavy!!” you groaned, struggling to hold the both of you up at the same time. “i was joking!! of course i want to…ahh, of course i want to be close with you!!” as soon as those words came out of your mouth, he got off of you, smirking at you with a pleased look in his violet eyes. 
“that’s all i wanted to hear~” he stated, continuing your walk home as if he hadn’t been laying all his weight on you two seconds ago. all you could do was roll your eyes at him, but your smile was still on your face as the two of you continued walking, ran’s hand finding yours again and lacing your fingers together. 
“also…” you suddenly spoke up, “i know it takes longer to get home this way…but i get to spend more time with you…” you trailed off, feeling a bit shy about what you had just admitted. “i mean, i don’t want to be greedy or anything, but it’s nice that we can spend this time just the two of us, since you’re usually pretty busy with your…stuff, and i’m busy with school...” 
when you looked to ran after you finished talking, you were surprised to see the soft smile that was across his lips, his eyes looking at you as if you were the only person on the planet. 
“you can be as greedy as you want, (y/n). hell, i’m probably more greedy than you’ll ever be in your whole lifetime.” he squeezed your hand a bit, pulling you a bit closer to his side as you two kept walking. “if you tell me you want more of my time, i’ll drop anything and everything for you. so, just tell me.” 
“...okay then.” you answered warmly, smiling at him. “also, walk a little slower. your strides are so long it’s hard to keep up with you.” 
“hm? i’m already slowing down for you.” 
“yeah, well, walk slower.” 
“oho, you were serious about wanting to spend more time with me, huh? no problem then, doll~” 
˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗
“c’monnn, you know nothing would happen to you, right? i wouldn’t ever let anybody hurt you, (y/n).” 
“i’m not sneaking out to go out with you, ran! we have school tomorrow! why can’t we just do something after school?” you asked, already knowing what ran’s response was going to be. 
“that’s no fun!”
“ohh, so you don’t have fun with me when we go out during the day? wooow, i see how it is, haitani.” you answered, making your voice seem upset. ran was always teasing you, so you could do the same every once in a while, right?
“hey, you know that’s not what i meant.” 
“pff, ‘m joking.” you relented, laughing a bit at the sigh you heard from the speaker on your phone. “sorryyy, forgive me please~?” 
“that was a mean little trick, but i’ll forgive you ‘cause you asked so nicely. you seriously won’t even consider it though?” 
“no! i love you ran, but i also enjoy not being in trouble and i enjoy not breaking the rules. i know you’re not like that, which is fine, but you’ll just have to get over the fact that your girlfriend is unfortunately a stick in the mud.” 
“well, i prefer to use the term ‘good girl’ ‘cause it’s cuter, but it’s okay, i can let it slide. can we go out after school, then?”
“that depends…are you actually going to show up to classes tomorrow?” 
“hey, that hurts! i’ve been showing up to school a lot more lately!”
“and then all you do is pass me notes instead of taking notes.” 
“in my defense, you just said show up, not to actually do anything.”
“please?” 
“...fine, but you’re riding on my motorbike when we go out.”
“as long as you don’t drive me to my house, that’s fine i guess…” 
“don’t worry, you can hold onto me as tight as you want~”
“h-hey!!” 
˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗
you look so beautiful today ♡ can’t wait to see you after school~
you immediately folded up the piece of paper, shifting your notebook to slip it underneath so that nobody could see it. you could already feel ran’s gaze on you, confirming it when you peeked over and made eye contact with his lazy violet eyes, the corners of his lips turning up into a small smile. 
you looked back to your teacher in the front of the classroom who was droning on and clearly not paying attention, so you decided it was okay to not pay attention for a little longer. you looked back at ran, who was now making a little finger heart at you and mouthing something. 
“i…love…you.” 
your heart skipped a beat and you could feel your cheeks flushing, which only made ran chuckle a bit as you continued with paying attention to the lesson, (he was satisfied knowing that he had successfully distracted you). 
˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗
“(l/n), can you make copies of this printout for tomorrow’s class?” 
“sure!” you chirped, taking the handout from your teacher and glancing over it. “i’ll leave them on your desk when i come back!” 
“thanks, i appreciate it.” you hummed in acknowledgment before leaving the classroom, making your way down to the printer room where the copier was. 
“where’re you goin’~?” the sudden voice in your ear made you jump, though you didn’t do anything more drastic since you recognized it almost immediately, your mind suddenly remembering that you were supposed to be going out with ran right now. 
“ran! ahh, i’m so sorry, just let me do this and then we can go?” he joined you at your side, looking into your pleading eyes for a second before sighing, a bit of a frown on his lips. 
“fiiine, but let’s make it quick. i found a sweets place i think you’d like.” you raised a brow when he continued to follow you to the printer room and he raised a brow back, wondering why you were confused. “you thought i was just gonna leave?” 
“i mean, yeah…this won’t take that long and it’s kinda boring.” 
“sure, but i’m with you, so it doesn’t really matter to me either way.” he responded casually, opening the door to the printer room now that the two of you had arrived. 
“you’re such an idiot, but you’re cute i guess.” you murmured, unsure of how to respond to his words. 
“here’s the part where i get to say, ‘but i’m your idiot’~” you only rolled your eyes, opening the top of the copier and laying the worksheet down flat and closing it. you could feel ran’s presence behind you getting closer, so you weren’t surprised when he rested his head on your shoulder, watching your movements as you input the number of copies to make. 
as the copier began to print out the copies, ran slid his arms around your waist, holding you firmly against his frame. there wasn’t anybody else in the room nor any windows, but you were still a bit anxious that somebody was going to come in and get the wrong idea. 
“ran, someone could walk in.” 
“what? i’m not even doing anything.” he teased, pressing kisses on your shoulder.
“this-! this is something! it’s like super pda!” 
“it’s not like we’re having sex-” 
“okay, stop!! forget i even said anything!!” you interrupted, wiggling out of his embrace to open the top of the copier, grabbing the worksheet you had put there and putting it on top of the stack of copies. “i’m almost done here, so go wait for me outside and i’ll be out in five minutes. bye!” 
before ran could say anything to response you had already sped out of the room, leaving him there chuckling a bit to himself. 
how cute. 
˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗
“i’m actually not so sure about this anymore.” 
“hm? are you scared?” ran asked. you had thought that it would be worth it to agree to go on his motorbike if he came to class today, but now…you weren’t so sure. 
“are you sure this is safe? there aren't even any seatbelts…!” 
“you don’t trust me, doll?” 
“it’s not you i’m worried about!” you exclaimed, feeling a bit panicked. “what if there’s someone else who’s driving drunk and they hit you! a motorbike versus a car, the car would definitely win! how can you feel so confident riding this thing all the time?! what if something happens to you-?!” 
“hey.” ran suddenly said, taking two long strides to come face to face with you. “it’s okay.” he murmured, cupping your face and carefully smoothing his thumb over your cheek. “nothing has ever happened because i’m always careful. i’m always thinking of you, (y/n). i would never do anything that would threaten my own safety because i know how you would feel if something happened. okay?” 
“...you’re not lying?” 
“could never lie to you.” 
“...okay.” 
“how ‘bout we go get some cake for you, hm?” you nodded, wiping away the tears you hadn’t known you’d shed and feeling a bit ashamed at your sudden outburst over seemingly nothing. 
“‘m sorry.”
“don’t be. i probably give you every reason to worry, so you can let it all out.” 
˗ˏˋ𖤐ˎˊ˗
“you feelin’ better now?” ran asked, an amused smile on his face as he watched you absolutely devour the slice of cake in front of you. you tried to respond but couldn’t, your cheeks full of cake. ran made a motion that told you to finish before speaking, giving you a few moments to finish chewing. 
“yes! sweets fix everything!!” you declared, a big grin on your face. “see, if we had gone out at night this place wouldn’t be open!! isn’t this so much better?” 
“mm, doesn’t really matter to me. as long as you keep smiling like that, pretty~” you coughed at his sudden flirty words, accepting the cup of juice ran offered you and chugging it to get the cake that was stuck in your throat down. 
“s-sorry…” 
“hah, it’s cute how much my words affect you.” 
“shut up.” 
“will do~”
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
noxtivagus · 1 year
Text
hfddkjfaskldf
#🌙.vent#i'll fix my account by the end of the week but. i feel so empty right now this hurts so much#i haven't been doing well at all lately yeah not getting proper sleep or not eating well n generally just yeah#it affected my academics a bit i submitted some things late or took so long on stuff. for this one course though in particular#unfortunately two of my grpmates seem to be unnecessarily serious in a way that. god i don't know how to explain but yeah#setting internal dls cldn't meet them but we still submitted on time n. i've. been rather anxious lately so it's been hard to yh in the gc#i can't even cry or really feel it anymore at this point it just feels so empty and hollow inside#regrets.. if i. if i didn't. if i didn't oversleep if i didn't procrastinate if i did better then.#me n my other grpmate who also had some problems w doing their part of the assignment r gna do it by pair. n the other two by pair too#it just hurts bcs there's so many ways this cld've been prevented but i guess i do deserve this#one cld always do better in the future but there's no changing anything that's already happened#i'm trying to. be kind to myself or i'll collapse but ....i want to just end this in a way#this is. i used to perform really well in academics it hurts how i'm like this now. even if it's been emotionally hard that's no excuse smh#from previous years i said i'd do much better this year. but i'm falling apart again n#thinking about how this may idk wld this affect on my grade as a whole or maybe even conduct?#if it does then i want to kms haha. i guess i wouldn't literally tho but. maybe this is the push i needed! i'll be back to normal i have to#be. 'perfect' enough in a way. it hurts i won't cry but it suffocates me n. i'm so tired & i always end up disappointing myself in the end.#it hurts thinking of how i'm letting down my past self n. my future self. i need to do much better but i can't erase my mistakes#it hurts so much that i want to give up i don't want this anymore i was starting to feel better but oh well i'm so fucking disappointed#i have to do my best this sy. this is so disappointing i just want to fucking give up#i can't bring myself to distract myself w games for comfort. i can't bring myself to talk w others at all bcs i don't want to bother them#i'm stuck here on my own just drowning in regrets. trying to swim back up is useless if i'm in the middle of the ocean#maybe years from now if. those exist. this wldn't burden me so much but. now in the present it's just too much#....it's the same feeling of emptiness from years back i know this well#it starts out first a bit destructive. feeling sad then better; then smth like this happens n. i'd change. empty for a while#then i'd go on about my life as i 'should'. just surviving day after day#i'm v disappointed now yes but i do know years from now older me wld be disappointed if i neglect myself#it hurts i'll just do what i need to do i don't know anything more right now other than being alone n in pain n it hurts i'm so stupid#rn mostly i just feel empty but i'd say i'm fine. my mind's clear. i'll push myself to be productive bcs i know i'm capable anyways#just need myself and surely i'll be fine. regardless of whatever problem comes my way. surely i can handle this as always
1 note · View note
saddestsquid · 1 month
Text
Hopeless Romantic! König <3
Summary: Hopeless Romantic König who meets you at a park and finds love at first sight to be true. You two enjoy a cute date until he takes you home and gives you one last treat ;)
Words: 2342
Warnings: 18+, overstim, König eats F!Reader out, fingering, fluff to smut, praise, cute romance, squirting, certified munch König !!
Tumblr media
He feels like an idiot standing there in the scenic park, awkwardly holding a bouquet of fresh pink roses. He’d picked them out specially for her, and took the time to sprinkle glitter onto the beautiful petals, but it was all for nothing. All his effort went to waste as the poor guy got stood up.
Wallowing in his own shame, he barely noticed someone yelling in the distance until it got closer. He finally snapped out of his trance to see a dog running straight at him. He bent down and stopped the panting golden retriever, caught off guard but smiling and petting it.
“Rover! Oh thank gosh…” He thought it might be the angels themselves speaking when he heard that voice, but he looked up to see nothing but a beautiful woman with a relieved expression. Looking at her closely, he figured perhaps he was looking at an angel.
“Thank you for stopping him, he just runs straight off whenever I let him off leash.” You apologized breathlessly.
König smiled, and found himself forgetting the failed date entirely as he got lost in your eyes. “It’s not a problem, he’s quite adorable.” He responded, and he noticed your eyes widen the tiniest bit at his unfamiliar accent.
“C’mere Rovey,” You cooed, and König’s heart pounded in his chest. The dog trotted straight into your arms and sat still while you hooked the leash back onto his collar. Gosh, what König would give for your sweet voice to be directed onto him like that. 
König stood up and you followed suit after making sure your pooch’s collar was secure, and he didn’t miss the way your jaw dropped when you noticed his towering height. Seriously, what are they feeding this man??
You blushed and suddenly felt shy in the presence of this not only polite but incredibly tall man. He was handsome too, with alluring blue eyes that stared at you with such intensity you had to look away. 
Only then did you notice the fallen bouquet.
“Oh! Is this yours? I’m so sorry, did Rover knock it out of your hands-“ you apologized profusely and picked the shimmering bouquet up, handing it back to him. He didn’t give a flying fuck about the fact it fell on the ground tho, he didn’t even notice since he’d been so focused on staring at you.
He shook his head and didn’t bother taking it out of your hands. “No no, no worries. I uhm…I don’t even need it anymore anyways, my date didn’t show up.” He admited with a sigh.
He regretted telling you the moment your expression turned upset. “That’s horrible, I’m sorry.” You muttered sadly, and he felt the desperate need to make you smile again.  “Well this is beautifully made, too bad I couldn’t have been your date.” You joked, trying to lighten the mood but being completely honest.
He stared down at you and blushed as well, “You don’t mean that.” He denied.
“but I do! I would give anything for someone to put this much effort into something just for me.” You admitted, smiling up at him and giggling until you noticed his expression seemed serious.
“Anyone who hasn’t already is a mad man.” He said with a genuine smile, and took the bouquet out of your hands only to offer it back to you. “Little—Rover, was it?—seems to want to explore the park. So, why don’t we all go for a stroll Ja? Rover, me, and…..” He trailed off, so you told him your name.
“And you are?”
“König.” He announced, his addicting accent shining through when he said it.
“Well König…..I don’t see why not.” You accepted his offer and the flowers with a gentle smile that he found himself wanting to see for the rest of his life.
His awful day just got a whole lot better. 
You both spent the day walking around the lovely park, with you having to take twice as many steps just to catch up, which only proved to make him cackle. You admired the ponds and threw sticks for Rover, trusting that König and his long legs could catch up to the hound if he ran too far. He told you about how Austrians typically love to walk everywhere, and you followed up with about a hundred questions about his home country. You even got ice cream, which gave König all types of thoughts when he watched you wipe off the dripping white cream from your lips. He assumed you didn’t notice his stare and flushed cheeks, but you definitely did. Not so much of a gentleman now, hm?
Finally, when it was dark and the park became quiet you both decided to head home. When exchanging numbers you mentioned how you had to walk back to your house since you walked here with your pup earlier in the day for exercise, and König was not having any of that.
“Nein, it’s much too dangerous at night.” he shook his head, leaving no room for argument. “I will give you and your golden a ride home, it’s not a problem.” 
“Really König, it’s okay. I don’t want Rovers hair getting all over your seats.” You whined.
“And I don’t want you getting kidnapped off the side of the street Maus, which sounds worse to you?” He asked, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow.
You tried to argue but came up with nothing and sighed in defeat. “Fine, I’ll let you be annoyingly nice….” You pouted, and he laughed while opening the door for Rover to jump in the back—probably a sign you need a more protective dog if he didn’t even hesitate going in somewhere unfamiliar—and the passenger door for you. 
You gave him directions like his own little passenger princess, looking tiny in the truck that must’ve been specially made to fit someone as giant as him. You dreaded the moment when he pulled into your driveway meaning you two had to part. You’d only met him a few hours ago, yet it felt like you’ve known him for years.
“Have a good night, liebling.” He got out to help you let Rover out and walk you to your door, but before he could turn around to head back to his truck you stopped him. “Actually, would you like to come in?” You offered, setting down the flowers on your counter and smiling suggestively.
He turned beet red like he did at the ice cream stand, but nodded quickly. You giggled and grabbed his hand to drag him inside, pressing your lips together as soon as the front door was closed and Rover was sleeping further away in the middle of the kitchen floor. (Don’t get nasty infront of your pets guys!! They can get scarred for life too ok 😣)
“Jump.” He ordered, and you did as he said and leaped into the air. He caught you with ease, hands grabbing onto the back of your thighs and squeezing the soft flesh. 
He stumbled around for a moment, overly  caught up in your make out session but eventually finding your bedroom. He dropped you flat on your back on the bed, kissing at your neck and seeing which spots got the biggest reactions out of you to start sucking hickeys into.
You moaned and writhed, begging him to do something, and like the gentleman he is, he decided to help you out and tugged down your bottoms, rubbing circles onto your clit through your panties. 
He grabbed your ankles and tugged you to the edge of the bed, spreading your legs wide for him to fit his broad shoulders between. He bit and sucked deep purple marks into your sensitive thighs, watching them writhe in his grasp. 
“König- fuck, please!” You begged, tho you weren’t even completely sure what you were begging for.
“What is it Maus? Tell me what you need.” He asked while pressing kisses up your thigh, leaving love-bites dangerously close to where you needed his mouth most.
“Want…..want your mouth on me. Or your fingers or- ngh! Anything please König- please!” You cried out, already begging pathetically for his touch.
With a devilish smirk he finally tugged down your panties. You clenched around nothing at the cold air and the look of admiration in his eyes as he stared down your cunt. 
“Such a pretty pussy….” he mumbled, “all this just for me sweetheart?” He asked, gathering your slick on his fingers. 
You turned your neck and buried your face in your pillow in embarrassment but he just reached up to grab your chin and turned you to look at him. “Eyes on me.” 
Finally satisfied with your pretty eyes gazing down at him, König delved into your cunt, gripping your thighs and shoving you impossibly closer like he wanted to devour you whole.
Your moans and choked out whines served as fuel for him while he ate you out like a man starved, his big hooked nose bumping into your clit making you shake and arch your back off the soft sheets.  
He dives his tongue into your entrance to fully taste you, and the satisfied hum he releases vibrates in your core and leaves you a leaking, panting mess as he licks you up like your the last bit of water on the Sahara ground.
 He licks a stripe up your pussy until he gets to your clit and starts sucking on it. He’s shameless to the sloppy wet sounds he’s making while he rolls the engorged bud on his tongue and prods a thick finger at your hole. You squirm at how big just the one is—about the size of at least two of yours, maybe more—but you welcome it in with a loud moan of his name. You were already dangerously close by the time he had his mouth on you, but the feeling of just one of his thick fingers slamming into you while he starts to tease another in has you crying out to the stars and cumming all over his hand. 
“That’s it schatz….just like that, mein gott you look so gorgeous when you’re cumming, Ich möchte für immer zwischen deinen Schenkeln bleiben.” He praised you, still pumping his two fingers into your clenching cunt to ride out your high for as long as possible. 
He pulls his fingers out and licks them clean, leaning down to lick up any of your arousal that spilled onto your thighs. When you finally opened your eyes you noticed him staring at you darkly, and the expression made heat pool in your gut.
“W-what?” You asked, half nervous-half turned on. You went to close your legs but he gripped your marked up thighs and laid your legs over his shoulders to have even better access to your soaked cunny.
“Oh we’re not even close to done prinzessin.” He announced with a smirk before sinking three fingers straight back into your pussy, fully intent on making you squirt for him.
You gasped and nearly choked on your words, “wha-y hah-“ you moaned and twitched in overstimulation until he slowed. 
“Tell me to stop.” It was a question; not an order.
Tears leaked down your flushed cheeks but you gasped out; “keep going” and he smiled, the whole bottom half of his face dripping. He wasted no time diving straight back in, inhaling your scent. “Mit Vergnügen, mein bedürftiges kleines Häschen.” He mumbled into your clit, not even bothering to speak English anymore as he knew your fucked out brain could barely comprehend anything. Four of his large digits split you open, grinding and prodding farther into you than you could ever reach on your own. Without much time he found that sensitive bundle of nerves, and you didn’t fail to let him know when you cried out and scratched at your sheets, chanting his name like a mantra.
“König- ah- KönigKönigKönigKönigpleasefuck- pleasepleaseKönig plea- hah . .!..” You moaned, fisting the sheets desperately.
He relentlessly abused that spot, slamming his fingers into you over and over and teasing your folds with the other hand. He messily sucked on your clit, circling it with his tongue like a lollipop, using every part of himself for your pleasure.
“Come on my gorgeous liebling, mein diamant, mein perfekter Schatz, come for me. Squirt all over my fingers.” He begged, voice whiny and muffled into your pussy while he continued his relentless assault on your puffy cunt. 
“Kö….gonna- fuck m’gonna-“ You managed to stutter out  the warning between moans.
“Go on hase, let go. I’ve got you, go ahead.” He encouraged, ravishing your sweet cunny until you were squirting all over his face with a choked out scream, whole body trembling. You were stuck between running away from the burning pleasure and shoving yourself closer, but luckily you didn’t have to decide as he had you pinned down, groaning into your pussy.
Your vision went blank for a few moments, but you came back when you felt him still lapping lazily at your folds until you were whining and shoving him away. He pouted but stood up to fall onto the bed beside you, pulling your spent body into him and engulfing you like you were a teddy bear.
You giggled and pressed a kiss onto his glistening lips, tasting yourself on them. “Not to sound like a jerk or anything, but I’m glad you got stood up.” You joked.
“Mm, I agree. That was the best, most unplanned date I’ve ever been on.” He bantered back with a cheeky grin. 
You rolled your eyes, but then smiled sincerely. “Yeah, it was. I’m really glad I met you Kö.”
His pupils dilated adorably, like a kid seeing a candy store for the first time. “Me too, schatz.”
The two of you drifted off into a peaceful sleep, but not before you muttered, 
“By the way, that other girl is missing out. You eat pussy like a champ.” 
“You could call me a certified munch.” He bounced back, and your jaw dropped.
. . . Translations:
౨ৎ Ja = Yes, Nein = No
♡ Maus = Mouse 
౨ৎ Liebling = Darling
♡ Schatz = Treasure
౨ৎ Mein gott = My gosh
♡ Ich möchte für immer zwischen deinen Schenkeln bleiben = I want to stay between your thighs forever (goals 😋)
౨ৎ Prinzessin = Princess 
♡ Mit Vergnügen, mein bedürftiges kleines Häschen = With pleasure, bunny
౨ৎ Mein diamant = My diamond
♡ Mein perfekter schatz = My perfect treasure 
౨ৎ Hase = Bunny 
Quick tip: Depending on what device you use, If you highlight the text there should be an option to quickly translate! It’s a lot easier than having to go to Google/Safari/etc to search it up :))
Tumblr media
Thank you so much for reading !! It’s 3:00 in the morning rn so I apologize if it’s not very well written :C :C
This is just a sweet little thing to prepare you guys for the FILTHY blurb coming soon 😇😇 get ready!!
819 notes · View notes