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izzysillyhandsy · 6 months

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Ed and Izzy: Cleaning up the mess

As of the end of Ep7, Ed has left Stede and his whole life behind because "he doesn't even know who he is". And I'd like to suggest in this rambling essay that Ed's journey to self-knowledge and self-love can't properly begin before he's come to terms with what happened with Izzy.

Although Ed has steadily been trying to make amends, at the start of Ep6 he's still feeling unsettled and guilty as hell about the terrible things he did (was capable of!): killing his dad, condemning his whole crew to certain death, Izzy's toe, shooting Izzy, being "killed" by Jim and the crew with Izzy looking on...

There's a surprising amount of Izzy in Ed's flashback (I was honestly surprised the toe cutting made it in - somehow the whole discussion around "Izzy deserving it" made me think Ed thought so as well? But of course he doesn't think that. Izzy does.)

And while Ed's central conflict is his underlying self-hatred and self-doubt, there still is a daily reminder of all of his worst tendencies and (still very recent) acts right under his nose.

I think I got all the poison out of my system...

...or not. The indestructible fucker's still here.

Izzy is Ed’s walking and talking guilt room and no amount of deflecting, story-telling or sugarcoating can turn that poison into positivity.

Stede, I love you for your sometimes naive, sweet outlook on life (and Ed does too), but Ed and Izzy, that’s years and years of love and devotion, resentment and hate, building each other up and tearing each other down. They’ve just come out of the absolute worst breakup in history, with so many things unsaid and unknown they’d need the whole of S3 to talk it through.

Stede applying his motivational poster line to Izzy of all people is a little bit tone deaf, especially because it happens right while Izzy’s singing a bittersweet love song about/to Ed.

Which he continues, in French, while Ed and Stede are having sex for the first time so that's definitely not helping. I wonder how good Ed's French is, but it is honestly almost comical to imagine Ed cheating on Iz making love to his new boyfriend while his ex is singing his heart out about „It's only him for me, and me for him, for life - he told me, he swore to me, for life“.

So Izzy's still here. Izzy is still visibly hurting, physically (your fault!!) and mentally (your fault as well in so many ways). And you're already over it and having fun with your new boyfriend? Of course not.

Whatever they were/are to each other specifically, Ed and Izzy were as good as married. They spent almost every day together for decades. Izzy let himself be maimed and hurt over and over again out of love and loyalty. And Ed feels very, very guilty about it. Even if this guilt is not the first thing constantly on Ed's mind, it's certainly there in the background, simmering.

On the other hand, Izzy is the one who kept Ed stationary - they had a good, secure (for pirates anyway) life together, why risk change? I don't think Izzy had noticed (or wanted to notice) how bad it'd gotten for Ed for a long time. So there's also a lot of resentment there from Ed's side, all tied up with Izzy.

It's a very complicated mess and I think that all this is at least part of the reason for Ed's confusion and need to... just go.

But that's not all, by far.

History repeating itself...

...maybe this seems a bit familiar?

We don't know a lot of Ed&Izzy's backstory (apart from: it's a long one!), but I think it's (almost) canon that it is Izzy's job to make sure Ed is content and safe and, most importantly, to kill for Ed.

And even though their relationship (whatever it was) probably didn't start out as tender and sweet as Ed/Stede, I think they started out much more carefree and happy, possibly excited and adventurous. Until their lifestyle took a toll on both of them - Izzy as Ed's killer and constant protector and Ed as Blackbeard, who Ed started to resent more and more. In the end, all that was left were two broken people in a codependent relationship.

Now it seems like gentle, sweet Stede is slowly turning into Izzy 2.0 - swearing (as far as I remember, Stede almost never said fuck in S1), becoming a "real pirate", and worst of all, killing for Ed even though Ed almost begged him not to (seems familiar?).

Plus, this is happening when Ed, still freshly traumatized from his stint as pirate extreme wants nothing to do with violence in general and piracy specifically. Least of all he wants Stede damaged (or izzyfied).

Stede seemed like a way out of pirating, a chance for a loving, fulfilling relationship. Maybe even a way out of his relationship with Izzy, who I think Ed (subconsciously?) blames for the destructive path his life had taken.

Now he isn't so sure anymore if Stede actually wants this.

Talk it through...

...eventually, maybe. Hopefully.

Of course, not every obstacle Ed has to face, every step on the road to self-love and happiness is about Izzy. Vice versa, Izzy is much more than his relationship with Ed, and he has his own problems independent from him.

But this "marriage" with Izzy was Ed’s longest and most important relationship, and also the last relationship before Stede. The way their relationship became restrictive, damaging and unescapable in the end was both their faults. It'd be quite natural if Ed was a bit cautious with that kind of history. Am I a person who always ends up like this? How did we fuck up this badly? Is there a way out?

Most importantly though, a lot of Ed’s guilt and self-doubt is wrapped up in Izzy - if you're capable of doing that (and that, and that) to the person you love - what else are you capable of?

In conclusion, Ed and Izzy need real closure, one way or the other. Before that happens, Ed won't be happy on any way he chooses, and certainly not in his relationship with Stede.

At the moment, they're not talking, really. It's incredibly sweet though, the way they make these little concessions towards the other (Izzy doing much more than Ed, as per usual). They're almost shy, asking for advice, giving reassurance and understanding, and sharing bottles, smiles and looks.

Will they get a long heart-to-heart in the finale? Of course not, there's not enough time. I think we might get a symbolic moment though.

Ed already knows Izzy loves him. Izzy really doesn't know (on top of everything else, poor kid). The only thing he got from Ed was the "Sorry 'bout your leg", even the latch got a bit more.

Izzy needs to hear that too. "It's not your fault you're broken. You didn't break you. Just trying to do your job, weren't you?"

(btw, I love that Ed is softly blowing onto the latch here, while Izzy is doing the same to his little shark <3)

It's also possible Izzy will get his "I loved you, best I could" in person. Hopefully not exactly in those words. But, for both of them, this will be a start to open proper communication (which might happen offscreen between seasons).

And when we get S3, Ed will be (more) prepared to embark on his journey to happiness, with or without Izzy by his side.

#ofmd #ofmd s2 spoilers #edward teach #izzy hands #ofmd meta #Ed's got this Izzy-shaped rucksack on his back #it's not all about Izzy as a person it's what Izzy stands for #this was just from Ed's perspective - Izzy's also in dire need of something more #TALK boys

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luveline · 2 years

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miss jade your bodyguard!james example hit me right in the chest.. can I get candy apples and do you wanna dance? with a bodyguard!james au?? Where you’re dying for a sleepover with your girlfriends but he’s gotta sit in there with you and he totally gets into it gossiping and painting nails and doing face masks and making friendship bracelets? I yearn for big buff scary babygirl James and his shy little charge :’)) - happy Halloween !!!!!!! 🧡🖤

join luveline's halloween party ♡

mei my angel my literal everything best idea ever and I had to include what we talked about too, tysm for ur request baby happy halloween ♡ bodyguard!james x shy!fem!reader (also tipsy!reader)

You really hadn't wanted to bring it up but at the same time, you'd felt like you had to. James had assured you to do whatever it is that's going to make you most comfortable, even if what makes you most comfortable is actually making your new friends most comfortable.

"He... He has to come, but James doesn't mind sitting in the adjoining room. I'm sorry," you'd said.

Mindy, a friend you'd miraculously managed to make at the supermarket of all places, had given your bodyguard a once over with a huge smile. "Are you kidding? He's welcome to sit wherever he likes. He's very welcome."

You'd felt a flicker of something. Not jealousy. A general wash of embarrassment at the implication that James is, rightfully, eye-candy.

"Are you wearing aftershave?" you ask now, not a question you would usually have the courage to ask. You're shocked.

"Cologne, actually," James says.

You gawp at him.

James looks both lovely and ridiculous. He's bedecked in smart clothes, his casual civilian clothing, and it's enough to make your heart skip a beat. Tight sleeves, tight pants. He's a classic handsome on a bad day. Tonight, he's breathtaking.

Especially carrying your pink backpack.

You like how much he doesn't care about stuff like this. Your backpack thrown over his shoulder, your coat in the crook of his elbow. None of it is his job, the only thing he really has to do is stop you from getting maimed or killed, but he does it anyways.

"It's nice," you say awkwardly. What you'd wanted to say was worse. Are you wearing cologne to impress Mindy?

His smile is horrifyingly smug. "Thank you, princess. Think you should knock again?"

You knock again, your hand barely pulled from the door when it swings open.

"Hi," Mindy says, smiling as soon as she sees you.

It's such a nice thing, for your presence to make somebody smile like that, and you find yourself smiling back without any of your usual shyness.

"And hello," she adds, sizing James up with a light-hearted expression of dizziness. "Did you get more handsome, Mr. Bodyguard?"

James hand touches between your shoulders. "Maybe slightly."

Mindy laughs gleefully. "Maybe so. Please, come in. We were waiting on your before we start Dirty Dancing."

You beam. Mindy shows you and James into the living room of her home where the rest of your new friends wait. They're all just as excited to see you as you are to see them, greeting you with hugs and smiles. They say hello to James too, which is really nice. James doesn't mind, but sometimes people act as if he's not there. It's my job to sink into the background, he'd placated once.

Still, you don't like when people ignore him. This spells good tidings.

You're in very nice but comfy clothes, soft loose trousers and a t-shirt that's too big for you, because you'd thought that was what people where to these kinds of things — it's what they wear in all the movies you'd watched to prepare — so you're horrified when you realise they're all dressed in fancy blouses and fine jewellery.

"Sit down," James reminds you gently, putting pressure on your shoulder until you sit.

"Right," you say with a laugh.

"You can sit wherever you like," Mindy says to James.

He tips his head slightly to one side. "I really don't want to intrude on you girls. I can happily stay by the door."

Mindy shakes her head. "No, sir. You can protect your lovely treasure from right here."

James sits beside you.

Mindy is clearly quite wealthy. Her living room is a large space with huge couches and an impressive television bolted high on the wall, Dirty Dancing already queued and waiting to play. Before you know it you've a cocktail in hand and the lights have been turned down low, the movie accompanied by a low level of chatter.

"Patrick," Georgia says dreamily, watching as the main characters dance in the middle of an empty room.

"He's not very handsome-" Milly says.

"What?"

"Let me finish! He's not very handsome in the classical way, is he? But his demeanour is what makes him so yummy."

You huff under your breath, a laugh you can't contain as they descend into a debate on all his pros and cons.

"He's more handsome because he can dance. It's his charisma."

"What does Y/N think?" Mindy asks, turning to you eagerly. You almost choke on your sip of cosmopolitan, face growing warm under their expectant gazes.

It's not entirely their fault. James turns to you to, you can feel his thigh pressed closer to yours. This isn't the kind of thing you and he ever talk about.

"Um, he... Well, I think he's-" Your voice falls to an insecure murmur. "He's not not handsome."

"I don't think he's all that," James says.

The girls roar with laughter. You turn to James to watch him chuckling, a grateful smile on your face.

"Can you dance, James?" Milly asks.

His arms burns where it touches your own. "Not like that," he says.

More laughter. You feel two things at once, and this time you're willing to admit one is some sort of jealousy. He's super funny and you love that about him, you're just not sure if you love everybody else knowing it too. But then, the second feeling, pure affection for him. He deserves droves of girls fawning over him. It makes sense that they're all so charmed.

They all sing the closing song of the movie to each other in dramatic duets. Mindy tries to include you, and then Georgia does too, but singing in front of people isn't something you do. It takes too much courage. You'd have to disregard the embarrassment of being bad, and you're not good at that. Nevertheless it's a great time that makes you laugh until your side hurts, especially when Dahlia and Darcy try to do the dangerous 'lift' dance move.

You dip your head toward James. "You could definitely do that."

He laughs, startled. "Do what, shortcake?"

"The lift."

"Only if you're the one I'm lifting," he bargains.

"Never in a million years," you say, cheeks filled with heat.

They want to do manicures after that. This is two cosmopolitans later, mind you, but you gather around the coffee table with finger dividers, and soon Milly is passing out calming sheet masks she got from the supermarket. You laugh at one another, ghosts in practice, and your laughter gets worse when James agrees to let Milly put one on him. His hair's so thick and curly that he needs to wear a headband to keep it away from his face, a salmon coloured pair of bunny ears.

You're on your fourth cocktail, a long island iced tea, by the time your nails are done, and Georgia has started retelling a story about her last date, how weird the guy had been, and how he had failed spectacularly in the bedroom.

"I mean, I probably should've known there wouldn't be much joy when he showed me his matchbox collection, but I thought he was eclectic, not stupid."

You giggle and lean hard into James side for support, your own face mask starting to slip down your face. He's already peeled his own off, skin shiny and soft, and he reaches out with delicate fingertips to pull yours away too.

"Here," he says, dabbing the excess essence off with a flannel.

"Thanks, Jamie," you say happily.

"Worst date of my life," Georgia finishes, rolling her eyes.

"I can't beat that one!" Darcy says quickly. "I was twenty, and we went to Burger King for dinner. Burger King. I was wearing a little black dress and heels. And when we get back in the car, we were supposed to be going for a film, he leans over the handbrake and starts trying to kiss me and all I could see was a tiny piece of lettuce in his mustache," — you hiccup hard and slap a hand over your mouth, overjoyed by her tortured tone — "I pulled away, obviously. And he grabs my shoulder and said, come on baby, I saw how you were looking at me back there.

Back there. In the Burger King." She rolls her eyes. "You gotta be kidding me."

The girls share their horror stories and you laugh and sigh sympathetically in most of the right places, until you're the only one left who hadn't spoken.

"What about you, Y/N?" Dahlia asks.

"Yeah, what's your nightmare date?"

You stiffen. "I mean... I... I haven't-"

"Come on, it can't be as bad as the guy who spit in my ear," Milly says.

You laugh, because ew, but struggle to come clean without sounding awkward. "I've never been on a date before."

"Oh," Mindy says, sounding not disgusted but let down. She recovers swiftly. "Well, you aren't missing anything, babe."

"Yeah," Darcy placates. "Especially if it's with a guy. No offense."

James raises a hand. "Please, it's fine. I've no delusions when it comes to my sex."

The girls continue to try and comfort you. You hadn't wanted any comfort, and every new reassurance makes you shrink. It's lovely that they're trying to make you feel better, but you feel abruptly inexperienced and ashamed about it.

"I once had a girl break an egg against my forehead," James says.

They all pause.

"On a first date?"

"Yup. She'd brought eggs. In her purse."

They gawp. You gawp. You've never heard this story.

Halfway through a dramatic rehashing his hand finds your calf for a quick squeeze. You realise he's making the whole thing up shortly after and you've never felt more thankful for him. And he once stopped you from getting tasered by grabbing the weapon with his bare hands, so.

"Aren't we a little old for friendship braceletes?" Milly asks, a practically fully-formed chevron bracelet in hand.

You struggle with your beginners bracelet made of four strands. James, beside you, is a natural. Your elbows keep brushing together, and it's a lot.

"Some of us had bad childhoods, Milly."

"Shit," you whisper, your bracelet loop sneaking out from under the masking tape anchoring it to the table for the tenth time in as many minutes.

"You're pulling too hard," James whispers back.

"Everyone's quicker than me!"

Mindy yawns and proclaims to go receive the sleeping bags and air mattresses she'd promised. "Keep working, Y/N! I want that bracelet around my wrist when I get back."

"No problem," you say easily, and then, "James, what do I do? Please help me."

James looks over at your bracelet. You've made knots on the wrong strings, the bracelet more a net than anything. He side eyes the group of girls sitting around him, all putting the finishing touches on their projects, before quietly slipping his bracelet into his lap and swapping it with yours.

"Stick it back on the table and I'll show you," he murmurs covertly.

You stick his bracelet on the table in front of you with some masking tape and James takes charge. He grabs your hands with zero hesitation and shows you how to knot the strings, the 4-shape you need to make and which strings you need to make it on. His hands are very warm, super soft, and when he lets go you feel it like an absence.

"Get it?" he asks.

Kind of. There's an obvious difference in the quality of knots made. James' are all neat and uniform, yours less so, but you chalk it upto rushing and mindy doesn't know any different, hugging you as you tie it around her wrist.

"It's stunning," she proclaims. "Where's yours, Mr Bodyguard?"

He shows your bracelet. "I had some trouble."

There's a little wave of giggles that hurts your feelings, but then Darcy says, "It's alright, James. They're really hard if you've never made them before."

"Yeah, I spent an entire summer in primary school teaching myself. That's a great effort for a beginner!"

"Practice makes perfect, anyways."

James nudges you casually with his elbow. "Thanks, ladies."

Soon, the room is enveloped by the rushing sound of the electric air pump blowing up air mattresses. They're sandwiched together, and even with Darcy on the couch and Mindy in her own bed there's no enough room.

"I'm so sorry," she says, "I didn't think about where he'd sleep."

"Technically, I won't really be sleeping," James says.

Your heart is thudding painfully against your ribcage. "Uh, well," — you're so desperate to seem cool and not cause any problems that you blurt without thinking — "it's fine, James doesn't mind sharing with me." You look up into his dazzling, sun-kissed face. "Do you?"

A flicker of surprise clouds his features. He hides it. "No, of course I don't mind."

The time approached half-twelve quickly. James is off shift at 1AM, and while he might usually go home he's already told you he'll be staying the night. He hates when you're in unfamiliar places. You don't complain, though when it's dark and everyone is drunkenly snoozing in their plastic beds, you sit up in your sleeping bag and search for his figure in the dark.

"James?" you murmur.

"What, sweetheart?"

"Is y'shift over?"

"Yeah. Mason's just pulled up outside." Mason means Jack and Jack means the night team. You roll your eyes at how ridiculously looked after you are.

"Do you want to come and sleep? You must be tired," you continue, your own voice dulcet with an obvious fatigue.

James picks his way over to you where you're nestled in your pyjamas and sleeping bag. "I can go kip in the van, if it makes you uncomfortable."

Is he kidding? He's just spent the night not only looking after you but making sure time and time again that you didn't look stupid in front of your new friends. He might be the nicest boy you've ever met, and the last thing you want him to do after all of this is go sleep sitting up in the back of a van.

"Are you crazy?" you mumble, unzipping your sleeping bag to entice him in. "S'cold in here. Your nose would get frost bite out there."

"Poor night team," he laments agreeably.

The air matress lifts you up with James' added weight. He makes his way under the unzipped sleeping back and has to cling to your hip to stop himself from falling off. You frown at his scratchy clothes.

"Did you bring pajamas?" you ask.

"No offense, shortcake, but no. Obviously I did not."

Your sleep (and cocktail) addled brain doesn't have the energy to feel offended. "Y'gonna be uncomfortable."

He doesn't speak. You assume he's done talking for the night and curl your leg up toward his thigh, when he says, "You won't mind if I take my shirt off? The fancy labels are really itchy."

"No, fancy-pants, I won't mind."

Even in your state you can feel the nervousness of being so close to him after he's peeled off his shirt. He's a huge hot water bottle beside you and you face toward him, cold but miles too shy to make a move.

It's like he can read your mind. "Are you still cold?" he asks, pulling the sleeping bag up to your chin.

"A little. My nose is cold," you murmur, eyes feeling heavier by the second.

His hand lands tentatively against your cheek. His thumb rubs against the tip of your nose. "What was it you said about frost bite?"

You genuinely can't remember. His hand is so warm, his body, his touch something you desire badly on a good day and yearn ceaselessly for on your worst. You bracelet his wrist where it rests against your neck and rub over his pulse unthiningly.

"You want a hug?" he asks knowingly.

"Just for a second," you agree. Your dignity shrivels with the speed of your reply.

He laughs under his breath and slides his arm under your shoulders. For a second it's uncomfortable and achy, and then he's pulling the brunt of your weight onto his chest and wrapping arms around you.

You shudder at how warm he is, the heat of his palms over your spine.

You lavish in his hold and steal all of his emanating heat until you're toasty as can be, sleeping bag snug over your limbs and face nestled in the bare skin of James' shoulder.

"Sorry," you mumble.

"For what?"

You're surprised he's still awake.

"For... For being so... I don't know. Because you had to save me so many times."

"Saving you from awkward situations is easy, don't worry about it. And I think you would've done better without me than you realise."

His hand creeps up the nape of your neck.

You're pretty beside yourself, tipsy and tired and tenderised by his tactile touching. He's familiar. More familiar than anything. It feels like a dream to be in his arms. It probably is.

"You're a good girl, Y/N," he says, and it doesn't feel weird at all. He means it honestly. "You're kind. You're caring. People were bound to love you eventually. It took a while, but they do."

"It didn't take you a while."

"Well, I'm smarter than everybody else, you know that," he says.

You both laugh. His hand strokes the side of your face and rests behind your ear. You can't pin point when you fall from dizzy laughter into sleep, but James can.

He watches your face relax in the near-dark, watches your shoulders settle under his hands. The whole while he's thinking God, what am I doing? This isn't professional. This is the opposite of professional.

He tries to ease you off of him and abandons all hope when you turn your face into his chest and your lips touch his skin. Each exhale a warm kiss.

In the morning, he'll likely tease you within an inch of your life. You're shy enough on a normal day that he doubts you'll survive it. But for now, he rubs the length of your back and wonders if this is how you feel when he's standing guard. So, so safe.

#luveline's halloween party #marauders era #marauders #james potter #james potter x reader #james potter x you #james potter imagine #james potter x fem!reader #fem!reader #james potter fanfic #james potter fanfiction #the marauders fanfiction #the marauders fanfic #the marauders #bodyguard!james potter #bodyguard!au

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kyouka-supremacy · 7 months

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Follow up question why do think akutagawa listened to atsushi request to not kill people for 6 months? I don't think this has anything to do with dazai's approval. I like the bsd omake where akutagawa was having a hard time not killing and gin being genuinely worried about his mood!! It's funny how the entire mafioso seem okay with akutagawa's decision to not kill, until he settles his score with jinko.

I do think it was really just that Akutagawa, for how he is, keeps his promises. Once he accepted it - and he accepted it, because Akutagawa can’t turn down a challenge or a chance to prove himself -, I don’t think he ever even considered breaking it, because he’s of that kind: hyperfocused, straightforward, quite the executer, someone who doesn’t really question things but is used to stick to the directives when coming from a place he feels he has to prove himself to (that’s what Dazai made of him, after all). I do agree Dazai’s approval had secondary importance in this case. I also think Akutagawa just really wanted to kill Atsushi. He’s not used to… Question things, and he saw in keeping his promise the only way he could get to fight Atsushi in six months, which is something he really wanted to do, so he just did that. Akutagawa is quite narrow-minded and straightforward.

But again, even leaving that aside, Akutagawa being one who keeps his promises- I don’t know how to explain it, it just fits his character. It fits his being naïve and it fits his serious personality and his upbringing and moral compass. Seriously, I don’t think it was even because of Atsushi specifically, he just keeps his word in general, even if he was to give it to one of his victims before killing them. He’s a man of his word, it's in his very character introduction.

About how the promise could ever possibly concile with his Mafioso job, thinking about it is my personal treat! It gives back some kind of dignity and authority to Akutagawa after all the mud I so often have fun throwing at him ahah. I think I already summed up pretty well what I think about the matter in the tags here:

Surprisingly, I think Akutagawa has enough power to do that. Despite all the mud I throw at him he *is* one of the most powerful pm members and like... Realistically‚ now that Dazai is gone‚ what is keeping him in the pm anyway? On the other hand, it would indeed be a great loss for Mori to lose him. So I do believe to some extent they just make Akutagawa do whatever he wants to do; which most of the time is killing and maiming so that's quite convenient! But if for six months he decided to limit himself to the maiming part I don't think there's much they can do about it. Besides, I believe it's an important aspect of Akutagawa's character how... You could say‚ capricious, but overall simply untamable and unrestrainable he is. I think that although they never directly confronted about it‚ both Mori and Akutagawa know Mori has to leave Akutagawa enough freedom of action to keep him in after Dazai left. Because again‚ seriously - and that's a whole post for another time -‚ what is keeping Akutagawa in the pm after the dark era events? He doesn't hold any sincere loyalty to the pm like Chuuya does– his true loyalty still lies to Dazai beyond what even Akutagawa himself acknowledges. He can't fear pm retaliation like virtually any other member would, because he's objectively powerful enough that wouldn't be a problem for him. I mean who would they send after him? Chuuya? I mean they technically could‚ but it's going to be unpleasant for everyone. Tl;dr Akutagawa one day really showed up (unannounced) to Mori's office and told him that he‚ ruthless mafioso pm rabid dog™‚ wouldn't have killed anyone for six months and Mori just had to roll with it. But that's fundamentally tied to Akutagawa's whole character and his characteristics of being wild and unpredictable and especially uncontrollable. (Gin's reaction would be indeed hilarious though. Really SHE is the only person left in the pm that holds power over him I'm not joking)

I do actually believe that Akutagawa, despite not being an executive, has enough power to decide what he does and doesn’t do in the mafia. He’s the most valuable member that isn’t an executive, and one of the most powerful members overall. He’s often played a key role in the pm’s major conflicts. Mori has direct interest not to lose him. Yet Akutagawa has no real reason to stay in the pm? He joined because of Dazai, but Dazai is not there anymore. He never showed true loyalty to the pm outside of doing his job. It really is just a job for him- a job he’s quite good at doing, a job that’s perfectly fit for him, but still a job he can abandon any time. There are universes where Akutagawa doesn’t work for the pm. But that doesn't change the fact that it would be a great loss for Mori if Akutagawa left, so if Akutagawa one day is just like, “no killing commissions for the next six months”, Mori just has to deal with it. And Akutagawa – who after all has a very powerfull skill, and after Dazai left was able to climb the ranks easily – has enough authority to do that. He’s not an executive (and I firmly believe he will never become one), but he is not below executives either; in the story he’s always shown receiving orders from the organization boss directly and answering to him only.

Akutagawa is a wild beast. He doesn’t like being kept under the leash. Dazai had (and still has) complete control over him, but that’s because he’s Dazai, and because of the circumstances in which they met; that said, Akutagawa isn’t willing to let anyone else control him very easily, and after Dazai left the pm, Akutagawa stayed, but at his own conditions. Which more often than not align with the pm’s, because he’s good at killing, and gets some kind of satisfaction from it, so he’s fit for the job; but if he ever decided to temporary change the terms, to do as he pleases and not kill anyone for six months, that’s for the others to deal, because there’s no changing his mind (and you don't want to contradict Akutagawa).

#This is the first time I'm talking about Akutagawa in terms that aren't “pathetic” “miserable” “outcast” “inept” alcfyvlfyeibleagfblei #I'm so happy giggling and kicking my legs!!!!!#ryūnosuke akutagawa #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd analysis #people asks me stuff #The Gin / Akutagawa omakes (including the higu/gin one) are both my favourite omakes of them all by long distance.#They’re so good and I love the aktgw siblings interactions so much.

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fatass-angel-adam · 1 month

Text

Dumbass Adam Playlist for the Blog or Whatever:

Just a bunch of misc. TUNES that make me think of him, think of my Adam specifically, fit one or more of my verses, or just have a certain VIBE lol...

DISCLAIMER: Much like Adam himself these songs contain PROBLEMATIC THEMES so...warning I guess???

ALSO they're not in any particular order either tbh

Hell Is Forever Extended Remix (Guitar Soloed) - Hazbin Hotel OST

Witness - Mindless Self Indulgence (main theme)

Three Point One Four - Bloodhound Gang

Problematic - EURINGER

Stroke Me (Lance Herbstrong Remix) - Lance Herbstrong

Everywhere I Go (Castle Renholdёr Mix) - Hollywood Undead

My Dick - Mickey Avalon

Navy Seal Copypasta (The Musical) - Unknown?? (you just know he fuckin WOULD)

Personal Jesus - Mindless Self Indulgence

I.D.G.a.F. - Blood on the Dance Floor

Bitches (Kid Rock's Cock Rock Remix) - Mindless Self Indulgence

Mixed Messages - Tom Cardy

Do You Kiss Your Mama with That Mouth? - EURINGER

Jesus He Knows Me - Ghost

My Bullshit Pontiac - gONNA gET gOT vs. Mindless Self Indulgence

My Dad Says That's For Pussies - Bloodhound Gang

Go To Hell - Alice Cooper (Fallen!Adam verse)

Eat Those Words - Mindless Self Indulgence

Ready To Die - Andrew W.K. (EXTERMINATION DAY BABY!!)

Give The Kid A Break - Alice Cooper (Fallen!Adam verse)

Salvation (Mindless Self Indulgence Remix) - KMFDM

Sexting - Blood on the Dance Floor

DEAD! - My Chemical Romance (sort of Fallen!Adam verse??)

This Hurts - Mindless Self Indulgence (Fallen!Adam verse main theme)

House of Wolves - My Chemical Romance (Fallen!Adam verse)

Kill Vs. Maim - Grimes

Like A Prayer - Madonna (don't @ me just let me have this okay Fallen!Adam verse nonsense lol)

Hell Is Forever NIGHTCORE - Unknown??

Fuck Machine - Mindless Self Indulgence (semi Porn Star AU verse??)

Burn In Hell - Dimmu Borgir (Fallen!Adam verse)

Sister Sara - Alice Cooper (him being owned by Luci like-)

Spank - Kenny Wayne Shepherd (ft. Kid Rock) (THIS ONE GOES OUT TO @dreamerlucifer LMAO)

Dust To Dust - Misfits (Adam's death song lol)

Seven Minutes In Heaven - Mindless Self Indulgence

Little Talks - Of Monsters and Men (mainly just for one little part tbh and it's him dying in front of Lute BUT I'M INCLUDING IT ANYWAY-)

Emperor's New Clothes - Panic! At The Disco (kind of an AU I had in mind where Adam tries to taken over Hell from Luci?? IT'S NOT OFFICIAL-)

#dickmaster's tunes

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stormyoceans · 2 years

Text

losing my mind like. sorry i know i never shut up about dark pete burning the whole mafia world down to save vegas and macau but. i've seriously been losing my mind over it like

give me vegas and macau being late home after vegas went to pick macau up at school on his bike and not answering their phones and pete immediately knowing something is wrong. give me pete calling chay to ask if he saw them actually leave together and then, at chay's affirmative answer, calling arm all business-like: "i need a favor, but you can't tell anyone about it. if you won't help me just say so right away, i don't have time to waste." give me pete asking arm to hack into the security cameras on the way from macau's school to their home and watching all the footages until he spots a van cutting vegas' bike off and then taking vegas and macau away.

give me pete figuring out it's not a ransom situation but a personal vengeance. give me pete manipulating, bribing, maiming, and torturing people, promising them not to kill them if they give him the information he needs and then killing them anyway because whoever was behind this can't know pete is coming and dead men tell no tales. give me kinn and porsche eventually finding out what’s happening and asking pete why he didn’t go to them for help. give me pete answering, cold and detached, ‘frankly, i haven’t ruled out the involvement of the main family in this, yet. nor of the new minor one.’ give me porsche’s indignant ‘ai’pete!’ before trying to stop pete from leaving. give me pete pointing his gun at porsche because yes, porsche is his friend and pete loves him dearly, but that’s pete’s family they’re talking about and no one – NO ONE – is gonna tell pete how he has to go about saving it, if someone was stupid enough to think they could mess with vegas and macau now that they don’t hold the title of heirs of the minor family anymore, well then pete has to show them just how fucking wrong they are and bring them as an example for everyone else.

give me pete finally finding out who’s behind it and where they are keeping vegas and macau and getting ready to bring down an entire building full of people armed only with a gun and a knife. give me pete being smart about it, using stealth and smoke bombs to conceal his attacks, preferring the knife over a gun he would have to reload over and over again, putting into practice his experience as a boxer and all of chan’s teachings: circle around the target rather than move in a straight line; forgo the heart and target the abdominal aorta that sits unguarded at the top of the abdomen at the meeting of the ribs; if the opponent is guarding their vital targets well, strike at less vital areas to make the defender move and then go for the carotid in the neck, the brachial artery in the arm or the radial artery in the forearm, the femoral artery in the leg, the abdomen. give me pete finding macau locked alone in a room and macau not caring about the blood covering pete from head to toes and just hugging him tight because pete really came for them. give me pete handing the gun to macau because there’s no way he’s leaving macau behind and the two of them fighting their way to wherever they’re keeping vegas. give me vegas tied to a chair, half-high with whatever drug they injected in his system to keep him from fighting back, a constellation of cuts and bruises all over his body. give me vegas never seeing something so beautiful as pete, covered in blood and knife in hand, killing the dudes assigned to keep guard to vegas' room and then dropping on his knees in front of vegas to gently cup his face and put their foreheads together.

and the fucker who did this? give me pete dragging him in front of vegas and macau and not killing him right away, but slowly cutting him up and tearing him apart for every wound he can see on the two brothers: a tooth for macau’s split lip, an eye for the bruise blooming on vegas’ cheekbone, all of his fingers for vegas’ broken arm. and then, finally, give me pete bringing vegas and macau home and the three of them piling together in the same bed, holding each other all night, their little family of three that no one is allowed to touch.

#feeling some type of way tonight #who am i kidding i always feel some type of way about them #also i firmly believe pete doesn't enjoy torturing people like vegas does but as soon as someone touches vegas and macau?#well that changed everything #just as 'i will always love and be loyal to the main family' means fuck all to pete as soon as he suspects them #because he will never love or be loyal to someone as much as he is to this little family he found #also when pete finds vegas they obviously kiss too and vegas (even if he's drugged and hurt) is like #'if my little brother weren't in the room with us i'd fuck you right here and now'#and pete laughs and is like 'so macau being present is the only issue you see here? not like.. your general condition? you look like shit'#vegas actually THINKS about it. 'you could ride me'#pete just shakes his head utterly amused. 'i don't think that would satisfy either of us.'#and it's TRUE because what vegas actually wants is to spread pete out on a bed and take his time to worship every inch of pete's body until #pete is a sobbing shivering mess just begging for release #anyway..#i miss them every day #m: txt #vegaspete

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loganscroftersstash · 11 months

Text

the eye of the storm.

platonic loceit/dlampr

—

hello gang

it has been… a while since i’ve written sanders sides content. i was into it for years before i dropped it and now i’ve picked it back up again. i forgot how much i loved this series. i’ve been rewatching it and remembered just how much i was so excited for the reveal of the super mysterious and spooky orange side, and i got a little pang of inspiration from the working through intrusive thoughts aside video. here is some really shitty angst/comfort; it’s been a while so my characterizations may be off, apologies in advance. and also my apologies for the spacing— i wrote this on docs and i didn’t realize the spacing would be so wide. sorry!!

scroll to v end for authors notes!

—

The date with Nico had gone so good! Thomas was reeling him in hook, line, and sinker; and Remus was able to be contained for the whole time! Sure, he had some moments, but nothing that none of them couldn’t handle. Now, as the sun set and shades of fuchsia and orange painted the sky above the exhibit, everyone decided it was time to go home.

The moment Thomas began to walk back all of the sides sank out, reappearing in his mind in an all too familiar routine. Remus was the only one absent for their outing, everyone else should have been here.

While Roman and Patton were happily reminiscing about the date, exchanging compliments and giggles, Virgil glanced around. He refused to glance in a certain serpent’s direction, but the room still felt empty.

Something was off.

Was it the coffee table? Couch? Maybe the blanket…?

Click.

“Where’s Logan?”

That seemed to break Roman and Patton from their conversation, and they both turned to look at Virgil.

“…Hey, yeah! Where’s our Logan?” Patton asked.

“Oh, who cares! He’s probably sulking because Thomas went out and had fun with the cutest frickin’ guy ever!” Roman proclaims, overly dramatic as always.

Patton puts his hands on his hips. “Now, Roman. Be nice to Logan! He was just trying to get Thomas to be productive— ya can’t argue the state of his home is a little…”

“Revolting?” Virgil finishes the sentence for him.

“I was gonna say icky, but that works too!” Patton grins at Virgil. “But anyway, don’t get mad at him for trying to help!”

“Pfft— help. Nerd.” Roman chuckles, earning a slight glare from Patton. “He could try to help by not getting in the way of our already non-existent love life!”

“You know, Patton’s right, Roman.” Janus murmurs from his corner. “Your twin gave him quite the bit of trouble today…”

Roman straightens his posture, almost defensive, as he glares at the slimy fiend. “What do you mean? What did that mangy mongrel do to him?”

Janus shrugs. “Oh. Nothing. I’m sure you wouldn’t care about that, Logan is just a speed bump on the road to love, and all that…” He says dismissively.

“Tell. Me.” Roman insists, moving closer towards Janus. “What did he do?”

Janus examines his glove, almost unbothered before he looks up at Roman. “Well…”

Roman glares. A silent message to get it the hell over with.

“When Thomas was up in the wee hours of the night, Logan and him decided on a new schedule. You know how those work out for Thomas.”

“Yeah. They don’t.” Roman murmured.

“Mhm. Usually it’s just because Thomas is more… spontaneous. Carefree, if you will. He likes to jump from task to task. Doing a list can be overwhelming, but Logan was just so dedicated to helping him stick to it. And poor Thomas even wanted to do it!…”

“…Jan. You lied, kiddo.”

“Whatever.” Janus shrugs. “Anyways. Remus decided to make Logan’s life a living hell by trying to kill or maim Thomas or Logan himself, but usually he ended up hurting himself.”

“Is that where the sparkly green eyepatch came from?!” Roman gasped.

“…Yes.” Janus murmured. “Anyways. Logan tried to reason with him and—”

“Is no one gonna ask why he knows all this?!” Virgil interjects.

Janus huffs. “Are ANY of you going to let me talk?!” He sighs. “And before you ask, I listen. To everything. Are there ANYMORE questions before I answer the first one?!”

Patton raises his hand for a moment before it shoots back down.

“Perfect. Great. Back to what I was saying… Logan confronted Remus after a few failed attempts and tried to reason with him, because this was one of the few times he’s actually gotten Thomas on a schedule and he tried to stick to it. So, you can tell why he’d be a little irritated about his incessant attempts at getting him off task.”

Roman raises a brow. “And…?”

“Logan screamed at him.”

“Oh.” Roman chuckles. “Yeah, he does that—”

“His eyes shone orange.”

A silence fell over the room. There was a silent, unspoken yet unified agreement that they all knew what that meant. And they knew it was bad.

Virgil was the first to break the silence. “…fuck.”

“…Did… Thomas? See? Do we have to have another confrontation so soon?!” Patton gasped.

“No. No he didn’t. Remus mocked him for the outburst almost instantly and as far as I’m aware, the interaction was over after that.”

“…What made Logan lose his cool that badly over something like that?” Roman hummed.

Janus rolled his eyes. “Oh, I don’t know. How about the fact that you all ignore him?”

“How dare you! I don’t ignore Mark Zucker-nerd; I just don’t listen to him!”

“…Roman. Buddy. That’s ignoring.”

Roman paused, looking down. “…so it is! But either way— we don’t ignore him, Janus. It isn’t my fault he never has anything helpful to add!”

“Oh, please. Logan is literally the embodiment of Logic. He’s resolved how many of these past issues? Logan does the most and gets the least reward, Roman. You have the most influence over our host, followed by Patton and Virgil. Maybe lately me and Remus have had a little fun taking the wheel every now and again— but when was the last time you let Logan make a big decision? You decided to skip the callback, you decided to go on the date. All Logan gets influence on is his little passion project, which he’s probably abandoned at this point because I seriously doubt there’s much passion left in him.”

Janus’ rant has left the other sides staring; Roman in disbelief, mostly at the audacity, Patton in shame, and Virgil in guilt. Deep down, they knew Janus was right.

“…Okay. Maybe I’ve been… a little… controlling.” Roman murmured.

“A lot.” Janus hummed.

Patton leans over to him, “Hey, Jan— kiddo. Small wins.”

“Right, Patton,” He whispers back, sighing. “Anyway. I suggest we try to make this up to Logan one way or another. After we make sure he’s alright.”

“I’m not checking on him. I love the guy, but if I step ten feet near conflict I’ll throw up and die.” Virgil mumbles, throwing his hood up.

“Logan doesn’t usually take comfort from me all that well. I think he finds it kinda patronizing…” Patton frowns. “But I’d be happy to try!”

“No, you're right… and he’d only think I was mocking him.” Roman murmured.

One by one, all their eyes drift to Janus.

“…You want me to go in there. Don’t you.”

“Well, yeah! You’re the most neutral with him! Logan doesn't know you super well and while I’m sure he didn’t appreciate your impersonating of him, I think you see eye to eye with him on a lotta stuff! That helps!” Patton grinned. “You might be the best candidate for this kinda thing.”

Virgil sighs. “….I can’t believe I’m agreeing with this… but yeah. Janus is the best candidate for this particular job…”

“…Of course. Fine. I’ll go check on him.” Janus huffs. He leaves his little corner in the shadows, brushing past the other three and making his way down the hallway. It doesn’t take him long to reach Logan’s door. Usually there’s light peeking from underneath the door, but that’s absent this time. Hmm…

Janus knocks three times.

Usually a “one moment” or a “come in” would follow. But there is silence.

Janus waits a moment, before knocking again, this time accompanying it with a “Logan? You alright?”

He’s met with silence again.

Janus sighs, placing his hand on the doorknob and twisting slowly. He pushes the door open, peeking in just a bit to get an idea of what he’s getting himself into.

The moment the door opens just a crack it’s blown open with immeasurable force, pulling Janus inside and slamming the door behind him. The room is barely a room anymore— more so a culmination of wind. Janus can make out a few objects— calendars with black and red marker scribbled over the dates, some books and some pages torn from them, blank sheets of paper, and a few pens and little knickknacks. Glancing around quickly, Janus realizes there’s a soft, barely there orange glow coming from the center of the room.

Fuck.

“Logan!” Janus calls, trying to push his way through but inevitably getting pushed back against the door. “Logan, let me in! I will help!”

There’s some sort of loud noise, but Janus can barely make it out throughout the pounding sound of wind against his ears.

Fine. Be difficult. It takes a lot of strength, and a lot of mental willpower, but he’s able to carve out a path directly into the eye of the storm. Janus heaves a bit as he walks, immediately taking note of Logan.

He’s… never seen the other so distressed. And honestly, it stings.

Logan is sat on the floor on his knees, hunched over and sobbing. Janus has never seen him cry, never heard it either. But this is just too much…

“…Logan?” He calls quietly, softly. Trying his best not to startle the other.

Said side looks up with a horrified gaze. His eyes gleam with amber tones and the best descriptor Janus has at the moment is overwhelmed.

“Calm down, calm down.” Janus shushes, kneeling to Logan’s level. Instinctively, Logan tries to back away, and Janus lets him. He gives Logan his space. “Deep breaths. Breathe…”

And he tries. All he can manage is panicked and shaky short breaths that can’t be delivering much air to his brain. Janus could see this plain as day. “Logan. Think you’re stable enough to talk?”

Logan glances up and after a moment's hesitation, he nods quickly.

“Five things you can see. Can you do that for me?”

Logan glances around quickly. “Books.” He murmurs, almost rapid as he speaks. “…Calendar. Marker. Pen…” He looks around again. “Cube.”

“Alright. Good. Four things you can feel?”

“…Clothes. Glasses.” His tone is almost robotic, despite it being watery. “Wind… and… and… and the floor.”

Janus can see and feel the wind slowing, even if just a little bit.

“Good. How about three things you can hear?”

“You. Me. Wind.”

“Almost done. Two things you can smell?”

“Um…” Logan panics again. Another question he can’t answer. Of course. “Cologne? Maybe… and… and…”

“Focus, Logan. You’re okay. It’s okay.”

“…Ink.”

“Good. Last one. One thing you can taste.”

“Salt…”

The wind slows to a stop. All the objects fall from where they were propelled. They could deal with that later.

“See? You’re okay. It’s okay.”

Logan looks up, eyes still watery and overflowing with tears. He’s shaking. The word that comes to Janus’ mind is helpless. He knows it’d make Logan worse so he decides to keep that thought inside.

“Now. Would you like to talk about this?”

“I don’t know how!” His tone is surprisingly aggressive, but it doesn’t seem like Logan. It’s out of character for him. He’s crumbling. “I don’t know how to… to talk about this! I’ve never— I’ve never felt so… so…”

“Breathe, Logan.” Janus offers. “It’s alright. Just—”

“LET ME TALK.” Logan shouts; the ferocity of the moment is only comparable to earlier when Remus had pushed too far.

And Janus falls silent. He doesn’t take it personally. He knows it isn’t— Logan is just so overcome with it all he’s lost control. He knows just how bad they can be.

And Logan realizes just what he’s done a moment after, and he falls back into helpless sobs, curling around himself. He feels so fucking awful. Not only is he useless, but he’s an asshole too. Another flaw to add to the ever growing list.

“Logan, I know you’re overwhelmed…” Janus reaches a hand out to touch, but he hesitates, and quickly lets it fall back to his side. “Tell me what’s going on. What’s got you so upset?”

Logan hesitates speaking, before he sobs out his words, “I’m so awful, Janus…”

“If this is about today, you’re not. Remus is especially heinous and you know that—”

“It isn’t just today!” He shouts. “It’s getting harder and harder to do my job and get through to him— I-I’m not good enough, Janus. I can’t do anything anymore! I used to be able to… to do everything, and it was fine. My calendars were in perfect order, I kept the others in check while maintaining a balance— I wasn’t a fucking emotional wreck!” Logan sobs, looking up at Janus desperately. “I’m useless. I can’t— I’m not—”

“Logan. You’re magnetizing.” Janus murmurs.

“Magnifying.” He corrects.

“See? You’re still capable of doing your job. And you still do your job just fine.” Janus puts a gentle hand on his shoulder, smoothing over the wrinkled shirt. “Everyone’s been in chaos these last few months… and that’s partly me and Remus’ fault. We haven’t been easy adjustments.” He sighed. “But,” And he holds up his finger with a dramatic pause, “You of all people have been the most versatile. You put forth your best effort Logan— more so than the other sides have. You know that.”

“But my best isn’t good enough.”

“It is. It is. You don’t believe it is, but it is.” Janus assures. “It isn’t your fault you’re getting overshadowed.”

“Perhaps if my methods were different, if my tactics were better—”

“Shhh.” Janus presses his finger to Logan’s lips, effectively silencing him momentarily.

“Logan. You’re doing nothing wrong.”

“Then why am I getting ignored?”

Janus didn’t have an answer immediately. And he could tell that upset Logan even further, despite the fact he was trying to conceal his tears.

“I don’t know, Logan. I’m sorry.” He sighed. “But I’ll never ignore you. You know that, right?”

He sniffles, nodding.

“…Do you want a hug?”

Logan hesitates for a long moment, as if weighing the pros and cons. Potential comfort and warmth, but also a huge dent in his reputation.

This was a pretty big dent too. Fuck it.

“…Please.”

Janus wraps his arms around Logan, hugging him tightly. “You’re alright. It’s alright..” He murmurs. “You’re okay.”

While Logan quietly cried into Janus’ shoulder, the scaly of the two silently wills the objects back into their places. He doesn’t need Logan even more stressed.

“Do you feel better?”

Logan nods, swallowing thickly. His throat feels scratchy…

“…I don’t think I’ve ever felt those… those feelings so… intensely.” He cringes at the word; it feels sticky and wrong on his tongue.

“I know… but it’s all over now. You’re calmer. Your room isn’t a tornado.”

Logan blinks, glancing up. “Oh. I was…” He looks around quickly. “Everything is in its place…?”

“I put it back. I know mess overwhelms you.”

Logan can’t help the microscopic smile.

“Thank you, Janus… I… apologize for all this.”

“Don’t mention it. It was out of your control. Now,” He pulls away slightly. “Do you need me to stay? I’m more than happy to.”

Logan thinks for a moment, and then shakes his head. “No. I believe some time alone would benefit me. I need to ‘recharge,’ if you will.”

Janus stands and makes his way to the door. “Alright. If you need anything else, you know where my room is.”

“I do. Again, thank you.”

“No worries, Logan. That’s what friends are for.”

—

(i wrote these authors notes as i wrote the story; i didn’t wanna stick them in as i wrote so i put them all at the end.)

authors note: i forgot how vividly i imagined their headspace; even down to the order of the doors. in case you’re wondering, the hallway of their rooms (which you enter from the right side) goes from left to right as such: virgil, logan, roman, and patton. the dark sides have their own separate wing (because of course they do)

authors note 2: i feel like sides have a lot more willpower and control in the headspace than we originally think— and the dark sides seem to be more powerful than the core 4 so they have an easier time doing stuff like that. obviously since deceit can transform into any of the sides— which i feel like the other sides can do but choose not to?? if they can become thomas’ friends they should be able to transform into each other,,— and remus can summon objects outside of the mind palace and headspace— we’ve seen other sides with fidgets or swords or little caps but never anything like super big i don’t think? it’s been a while hah

authors note 3: i’m trying to make up some shit about the orange side while also keeping it vague so it’s not too specific. mostly cause i want this to be logan centric but also i want this to have the best chance at holding up after he is revealed

authors note 4: logan may be the logic side but he is also the autism side

authors note 5: this just became a loceit fic but i’m not even mad. logan x anyone supremacy

authors note 6: this just became a self projection fic but i’m not even mad. logan x self projection supremacy

authors note 7: i didn’t know how to end this so have some weird janus and logan

okay hi!! finally done writing. got this done in like… two hours shockingly. i speed ran this fr

no beta read we die like men.

reblog if you enjoyed!!

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quandaryqueen · 2 years

Text

Things I'd like to do

Various Batman Rogues X Reader

My brain is composed of sludge 3 AM thoughts and this idea came to mind. So the following content are just ideas of what I'd like to write... But can't because of time constraints but I'd love to share them either way, so yay.

💚 I would LOVE to write fics based on the first song to play in my playlist after I put on shuffle. Like... Send in some Riddleman variation, then I'd tap on shuffle and whatever song is on I'll write the Riddleman with it. You get me???

💚 I would love to write a detailed make-out sesh with YJ Riddler just cos. Make him feel all sorts of thing, make him feel soft, hard just akcnsncjdocj I love him ok

💚 I want to write a Gotham Edward x reader wherein Reader shares semblance with Kristen. So basically Reader is taking the place of Isabella but instead of stubbornly staying in the relationship and dying, reader has enough self-preservation and respect to recognise the fact that Edward only loves them because of their semblance with his dead ex gf that he killed. Not yet a fleshed out idea, but that's the whole gist

💚 I'm not very confident about writing Zero Year Edward but... He reminds me of Mitski's songs, "A loving feeling" and "Lonesome love". Idk, he just possess the vibes of that one guy that will make you think you're in a relationship when in fact... You're not, and he's just letting you tag around because having someone like you reflects well on him and other thah that, he is also a sadistic fuck.

I just... The angst material from the Reader attempting to break things of with him and yet he will always manage to pull you back... I my to repeat the process until you're drained.

💚 Fell in love of the idea of including Query and Echo in fics. Expect them to appear here in the future. And maybe an OC associated with them.

🖤 Gotham Penguin having a child, and said child is running for the student council. Like daddy, they will get what they want with any means necessary... Blackmailing other candidates, perhaps maiming some of them and father dearest couldn't be more proud.

🤍 Gotham Penguin once again, I just have like the me tal image of him being a good dad, okay? Anyways, I pictured his child making him a paper crane and he still keeps that same crane hidden in his drawer, along with whatever his child gives him. Letters, drawings, flowers, you name it.

🧡 Masters of Fear Jonathan being distrustful boy towards a student that's taken a liking to them and tries his best to be as nasty as possible to them, but failed. One day he calls them over at the back of the school in private to kill them and so as he his trembling hands hold their neck, he tries to read Reader's features because he wants to see the fear in their eyes as he squeezes the life out of them. Reader, thinking that Jonathan was just hesitating to kiss them, takes it upon themself to initiate the 'kiss', leaving Jonathan shock and Reader alive.

🧡 Harley Quinn Jonathan being protective of his psychologist spouse that works in Arkham. Just, some juicy marital drama ensues.

💜 I want to write an innuendo-filled dressing room shenanigans between theater actor Music Meister and theater technician Reader.

💜 Just a platonic fic between Dennis and Reader, Dennis being at his lowest and in need of comfort. I live for comforts such as these.

#edward nygma #riddler x reader #dc x reader #dc x you #edward nygma x reader #edward nigma #young justice riddler #young justice riddler x reader #dennis prowell x reader #music meister x reader #mof jonathan crane #mof jonathan crane x reader #gotham penguin #gotham edward nygma x reader #harley quinn jonathan crane #zero year riddler

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thelioncourts · 10 months

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If the shows gonna do Lesmand, don’t you think they have to go the polyam route? I just don’t see how they go there without it otherwise it kind of makes Loustat, Loumand and Armand/Daniel kinda cheapened

Okay, so I'm going to answer this and I'm going to beg people to not come for my throat; I'm simply answering this with educated guesses as well as general knowledge that I think pertains to this.

So. I don't really think the show is going to do Lesmand, at least not in a full-fledged ship/couple/whatever you want to call it. I truly don't.

If I had to give any kind of guess as to what Lestat and Armand's relationship is going to look like in the show, it's going to look a lot like it does in the book, but with a simplification of Armand's feelings in particular.

I think we're going to get, of course, the TVL/IwtV interactions between Lestat and Armand, namely their first interaction in Paris when they first meet as well as the tower scene and the torture scenes that occur in IwtV/TVL (with Lestat's POV). I think we're, of course, going to get Lestat with the theatre and handing it to Armand, Armand and Nicki, etc. and then, from there, I think we'll get certain aspects of the Prince Lestat era. I think if they're going to do The Vampire Armand (book), they're going to have to do an entire limited series, at a minimum, for him, and, in turn, Lestat will be in at least some of that.

But regarding romance, I don't see them doing a lot, if really, any of it. I think they'll have Armand begging for Lestat to stay with him after that first meeting, but I think that will be done to show some of the odd resentment Armand has for Lestat. Beyond that, I don't anticipate much romance, namely that we don't have much from a Lestat POV anyway throughout all the books combined.

I think one thing to keep in mind is that this is a television adaptation of the books, and it is not fully accurate to the text. These writers are not adhering to a solely book-fan audience, nor should they. They are appealing to a wider set of people, trying to maintain a following there.

Rolin Jones has repeatedly classified IwtV as a gothic romance and has said that they are focusing heavily on Loustat. He's not going to say that if they're going to go on a polyam route. Television works on a very particular set of...expectations, and s1 focusing on the essential marriage of Loustat, and its downfall, is fully setting us up to see them get back together and then be in a romance that is more sustainable for them (I don't want to say 'healthier' because nothing is healthy in this series, just in general).

It also appears that Armand/Daniel (Armandiel? Armandaniel?) is going to be important and, no doubt, focused on, given especially Daniel's current role in the 2022!world.

Loustat is a really heavy hitter with fans. Loustat posts by the AMC account get a staggering amount of likes/retweets/shares/etc. in comparison to literally anything else. Audiences are going to not be super thrilled about Loumand because audiences want him with Lestat; when the truth of Armand's actions are brought to light, fans are not going to like him with Louis or Lestat (killing Claudia, maiming her body, allowing Louis' imprisonment to make sure that happens, torturing Lestat, throwing Lestat's weakened body from the towers, etc.). Even when we see the different sides of him, the softer ones, the funnier ones, etc. we are going to see that predominantly in regard to Daniel.

It'll be made worse when TVL happens and they see what Armand does to Nicki. Audiences won't like Nicki near the end either, not for Lestat, but they especially won't think what Armand did is justified.

Anyway, this is all a very longwinded way to say that Armand is a character that television audiences are going to struggle with. I think they can absolutely sell Armand and Daniel, but there will be a lot of dislike next season with Loumand, and with that I think the idea of Lesmand will be so far from a (non-book mostly) fan's mind that it couldn't even be considered as a contender for Loustat.

So. Yes, long explanation short, I don't see Lesmand really happening on screen. Some moments? Sure. Insinuations? Perhaps. Long-term anything? Absolutely not.

#literally terrified to answer anything on here right now lmao y'all keep putting controversial things in my inbox #and then i get like seven messages telling me to kms or whatever #and while that doesn't bother me as much anymore i'm not a fan y'know?#so please be kind i'm just trying to be realistic to a point

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microwaving-tesilid-argente · 7 months

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my current thoughts on where the Mirror Princess dungeon arc & where it might go, as of Ch 158:

Honestly i'm not even worried about Bianca lol. We haven't seen her in forever, there's no way they're going to maim or kill her right now. and thr eye overseeing chaos would be so sad. She'll be fine! Aillette is on her way.

I'm more concerned about whatever on earth Reed has cooking up. He's probably aiming to eliminate the 1st Prince & Princess to throw the Vinchester kingdom into chaos, since the 3rd Prince is absolutely bonkers. It's a little curious that he chooses to do this by making the demons do things for him though. Guess he's too tired to do shit himself idk. Take a good rest king (?)

Anyway he'll definitely be turning up again or at least watching once Ailette shows up. I think it'll be cool if Reed and Tesilid fight one-on-one, but idk if they'll actually do that at this point in the story. I really want a scene where Tesilid is forced to fight Reed directly and Reed realises that he's stronger than he's supposed to be in Round 17. Although he might just chalk it up to Ailette feeding him cheats. I think Reed's reaction to [spoiler] would be so incredibly interesting and devastating, but tbh I don't mind if they do the hokey pokey for a little longer. It's kind of funny seeing everyone including Reed think that Tesilid is weaker than he is. (Although Tesilid is kind of is pretty weak rn because he hasn't recovered even i think half his strength. And he did get one-shotted by Reed last time, what the hell was that? He got taken down with just one off-hand move. He's going to die if he fights Reed by himself at this point, so Ailette definitely isn't going to let that happen. Rip my hopes and fantasies, maybe in another fifty chapters.)

Reed testing the demons' reactions to his face is pretty interesting though. What was he hoping to see? What would he have done if the demons did recognise him?

The way bloody no one except for Ailette & Agnes recognises him is also pretty interesting. Handsomest man in the world and somehow you're unrecognisable; you're so far outside of even demons' reaches and you're just an unattainable abstract to everyone, not a person. Although maybe it's because no one important has gotten close enough to him yet, because otherwise they would've died. (I wonder how Ephael and Hestio would react. I hope they join Ailette and Tesilid's Order soon.)

Also the way everyone wants to get a piece of him, corrupted or no, is pretty sad. Guy's cursed to be seen as the most irresistable piece of meat on the whole continent by almost everyone he encounters. It's so dehumanizing. :(

#s-class heroine spoilers #webnovel reaction #mirror princess arc #i also miss prinz......... when are you coming back :( will we ever get answers on whether youre ailette's brother in her prev life as well #or is that thematic point just being dropped... (obligatory 'no one tell me or even give me hints about this' disclaimer)#also just. sad reed thoughts hours #i did say no more tesilid thoughts this week but hahaha #thinking abt this story is what i love doing when i dont wanna think abt other things #might be slow on replies tho

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knowlesian · 2 years

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hey! sorry to bug you but that last post has my brain buzzing in my skull—do you think ed knows that izzy is oblivious to his aversion to killing people? 👁‍🗨 i’ve been operating under the assumption that while izzy hasn’t put it together, the threat lands because ed thinks he has and i’m SO curious about your thoughts on that entire interaction honestly

you're not bothering me at all! in fact, consider this a gold star super mario music moment because this ask actually unlocks some ed shit i have been dying to talk about but just hadn't gotten around to/had an excuse to throw together yet.

because i think ed knows izzy has no idea, and the toe thing is like... ooooh baby. okay, let me tackle this in two parts.

one: why i think ed knows izzy doesn't know.

i wouldn't say that ed had this plan in mind from day one of starting to build his pirate resume, but i do think he's a smart guy with social intelligence for fuckin' miles.

(the party in e5 is a notable exception that i think proves the rule: i'll get back to it later, though.)

so: ed would have needed to learn fast to protect himself in a million ways, including learning how to kill somebody but make sure they die a few steps/minutes later, when he's on homebase and it doesn't count or whatever. i'm sure he would have made the obvious leap that the scarier you are and the more you enjoy a good maim in public, the less anybody wants to fuck around lest they find out. and with fewer people who want to mess with him, there will be fewer people he has to incapacitate but not immediately kill.

the legend of blackbeard covers strangers' assumptions; but even when it comes to those around him, people also don't assume that somebody who models outsized instances of violence like we're told (and shown) ed employs are covering for a sad backstory and a lack of desire to kill people driven by trauma and self-hate.

they go oh FUCK, there is no doubt in my mind, that guy super kills people. (admiring/horrified, as applicable.)

(caveat: my outside chance thought here remains if anybody put those pieces together and kept ed's secret anyway without ever letting ed know he knew it'd be fang.)

so ed is definitely aware that a level of performed violence in public is going to buffer him from anybody looking crosswise. i think he's also been pissed off over the years and enjoyed the lashing out— or at least, the momentary release it gave him— more than he does now when he was younger, but i'd lay down money one of many reasons ed builds the legend of blackbeard so well is to cover for himself and make it so he never finds himself in a place where the issue is forced and he has to directly kill again.

(this is why i don't think he really intends to kill stede. i think at first he's just bullshitting and assuming he can just put izzy off long enough to sell him on something else because that's how it goes with them, and it's what he knows will get izzy off his back about stede/get him to stick around in the moment; and even when he's talking himself up to it in e6 after izzy does not let this one go, i don't think there's a world where ed goes through with that murder.)

i think ed also knows izzy well enough to know that if that lil gremlin ever figured out ed doesn't kill, he would process it as 'can't' kill. and men who can't kill are not Real Men, in izzy's sad violent little worldview. ed's choices would be a deficiency and weakness in his eyes as well as a failure of masculinity, and we have been shown over and over what izzy thinks of anybody who checks the fucked up weak/gay as in girly boxes he is so very sure are real and matter.

also: we are really not given an indication izzy is a guy who keeps a secret terribly well— or his thoughts to himself for long. like... kind of ever. if izzy knew ed is failing at a very basic standard of izzy's How To Be A Man Good And Hurt People Lots Until They Are Dead, i have to imagine it would come up. loudly, and often.

which brings me to 'then why the toe????'

okay, so. couple facts to lay down here, provided by canon or by extrapolation.

one: ed can read izzy and knows how to say or give him what he wants.

two: e9 establishes the toe routine is an old bit for ed, and it stands to reason izzy has either seen it done or heard about it.

three: izzy gets off on ed going all diy toe first communion. he gets off on it long, and he gets off on it HARD.

(ew. ohhhh this man. oh this weird sad gross man. TO THE PICKLE JAR, SIR, TO THE MOTHERFUCKIN PICKLE JAR WITH THEE.)

all of this says to me: ed knew that izzy would respond positively to getting his toe cut off, and that's why he did it despite telling us an episode before via how he talks about doing it in the past that he never actually liked it as much as it might have appeared. ("poor bloke", etc.)

whether it's because izzy saw it happen and got all omg. omg. weird violence that gets subtextually gay and tender at the end??? well sign my unhealthy expressions of masochism 'r us tiny ass UP and ed clocked it back then, or ed just knows him well enough to know that izzy's response to the Weird Vore would be 'unlike you sheeple, i see that this is a sign of love. my boyfriend is back and wanted to show me he understands now that there are no other ways or people we can be, this is FINE, EVERYTHING IS COOL AND GOOD AGAIN!' i would lay down money the toe was not so much ed being afraid of izzy, as ed knowing what izzy would consider a reward for reality check services rendered.

and i know that sounds... how it fuckin sounds, but we gotta adjust for values of the weird little fucker in question. izzy has his intricate rituals and catholic masochism shit constantly bumper-car'ing around his head like yes. good. love is suffering is violence is love is toes is love is I NEED THERAPY.

so for him, the toe is both reassurance edward is home to stay and evidence he can relax and stop riding ed's ass all the time, and that's even before it's a sex thing.

this gets ed: an izzy who is back in line and not as suspicious, which gives ed space to do things like cry alone or like. act how he wants, for five whole minutes.

so i think the toe was a calculated choice, designed to play on what izzy wants and expects in order to give ed some cover again.

and now, sort of tacked awkwardly onto the end: why the party and ed not clocking that those people were laughing at him at first is the exception to his social awareness on purpose. (outside stede stuff, which is this whole other related but adjacent kettle of fish.)

so: two major things are going on at the party, imo. the first is culture shock; when you're not used to the social rules of the road, or the rules you're used to mean something else to the group you're currently with, it necessitates a catching up period.

if i'm used to a world where people chuck tomatoes at me because they think i told a shitty joke and i enter a parallel world where this is a sign of supreme admiration for brilliant comedy skills, i'm not gonna get the compliment at first.

i used that dumb analogy to lead me into why it's even harder in situations where you are seeking laughs. if you are not trying to be funny and people laugh at you, there's a very easy question to ask: well, why are they doing that?

and then it's usually either because you made an inadvertent joke or they're a dick! easy to sort through.

when you are looking for laughter, parsing through if it's good laughter or not gets harder.

the party is sort of a metaphor version of what happens when you are a comedian from a marginalized group, poking light-hearted fun at your own group in a setting where people know what they're invoking and everybody's having fun. stereotypes often come into it, because at the core of some common stereotypes are occasionally truths! and because jokes hit different when they're made by thoughtful people who are joking about themselves and their lived reality, not being a jerk about groups they will never be part of.

and then: people who aren't in your group find it. and they laugh, and it is not thoughtful and it is certainly not fucking fun. they don't get it: they're laughing at you, because they think all the stereotypes they have about you are super fun and super true.

so ed, who is something of a natural performer and entertainer, is seeking out laughs at the party in e5, and that's why he doesn't see the laughter as a sign anything's wrong at first. he's making jokes, he's dancing— he wants people to laugh with him.

he does not want people to laugh at him.

then he's not joking anymore, he just doesn't know their stupid rich people 'we have so much money and ennui we made up new and dumber ways to judge people for not being as rich and bored as we are' spoon rules, and they still laugh at him.

as soon as that switch happens, ed gets it. it's not that he's bad at reading people, it's that a combo of culture shock and looking for laughs forestalled the obvious conclusion until the very second he stopped looking, at which point he immediately knew they were fuckheads and switched gears.

#...this got so long oops #I LOVE ASKS LIKE THIS THANK YOU #i invite them forever #speaking of now back to the ask meme answers i have yet to do

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gotyouanyway · 1 year

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here’s my personal ideal version of what should’ve happened with c’rizz instead of what did happen which i didn’t like

sorry this is so long lmao my brain is broken

so. background bc it was unclear/bad and i’m fixing it:

the church of the foundation believes all things must die. they preach that death = total absolution, salvation, and entrance into the next world. so they kill people who need to be saved whether it’s spiritually (i.e. those that need to be absolved of sin) or more literally (those that need to be saved from danger, illness, etc.). they decide who needs saving and when so yeah they brutally murder people and they’re aware they’re murdering people. killing = killing = saving. but to them it’s necessary and even good. ok. that’s it. no secret projects relating to immortality or building a vessel for dead souls. forget that.

so c’rizz was raised by his father in the church of the foundation and became a monk. a combination of his upbringing, some kind of telepathic sensitivity related to being chameleony, and moderate to severe mental illness lead him to be extremely devout. not only does he believe in the church wholeheartedly, he sometimes hears voices of people asking to be saved and he obliges them (mental illness + church brainwashing) and once he starts killing people he keeps hearing their voices afterwards (telepathic sensitivity, like he does kind of absorb their minds in a chameleon way, but only impressions. they’re not actually there inside him). maybe he (and the others in the church) BELIEVE that he’s saving souls within himself in some way, but not literally. anyway because of this ~communication with the dead, and his devotion and the church/his father’s influence, he becomes the super mudermonk they turned him into. the absolver.

later he meets l’da and all of that stuff happens, she “returns him to sanity” or whatever he said. all of that can stay. now he can draw a line between saving someone and killing them in cold blood (as that IS a difference that exists for him), but he still gets confused sometimes when the delusions flare up. and he still hallucinates. and mostly, he’s happy to use his religion as an excuse to maim people he hates, as a matter of personality. like, he still has his faith, he’s just more mentally stable about it. so much more in touch with reality than when the church was constantly getting up in his head and encouraging his delusions

so then basically everything up to his death can stay the same but within the context that when he says he’s saving someone, he DOES mean in the spiritual or physical sense of rescue and not “saving their soul inside the reliquary of my body”. and, just to reiterate, with the full sound-of-mind understanding that he IS killing and murdering people. like, he always knew that in canon i just can’t put too fine a point on it w/r/t his sanity. his delusions weren’t that he was saving INSTEAD of killing people. his delusions were about who needed to be killed/saved. and he didn’t even experience MANY delusions like that during his time with the doctor, he was more or less stable and just angry. so he leaned back on his faith when threatening and injuring people who harmed him, just bc that’s the way he is as a person. ok uh. um

SO HIS LAST STORY goes something like this -->

1. they land on that planet with all the lost/trapped souls crying out to be saved. c’rizz hears them and oh man he can’t just let them stay trapped, he’s the absolver. he has to save them. 2. he teams up with the guys who are trying to destroy the citadel (or whatever was happening) because he plans to just kill (save) everybody on both sides. the telepathic onslaught makes him start losing it for real 3. the doctor and charley find out what he’s doing. big dramatic scene blah blah blah he finally explains all that ^^ to them. it’s all very intense and they’re kind of horrified and concerned 4. the nature of religious trauma and mental illness are delved into 5. the destruction is immanent, but c’rizz can stop it. it’ll kill him though 6. he does not, at this or any point, turn into any sort of devil creature 7. otherwise the end is the same. the doctor convinces him that he doesn’t have to do what the church programmed him to do and saving their lives is better than “saving” their souls or whatever by killing them 8. he sacrifices himself and dies just the same, but this time with a more satisfying character arc 9. done. easy. someone hire me

#i can't do my job but i can sit here and write shit like this for an hour #p

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8bitsupervillain · 11 months

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Ok mild leading! You may have already gotten this in the interim but, what about the other main question of 6 - why can only one of Shannon and Kanon find love, and the other must disappear? Other questions, what is Battler's sin, and other than the sin, what is the culprit's motive? Why does everyone die at the end each time, and why can it not be proven that a crime even occurred (they all call it an accident) in the future timeline? (you actually already have the answer to this last one available but you may not have noticed it)

Please forgive the extreme length of my reply.

In regards to why only Shannon or Kanon can receive the magic power of love, Zepar and Furfur say that it's because of their status as "furniture." They're somehow, cosmically I suppose, less than human and they need the magic to become a whole person so they can actually make something of their romantic situation. So when Kanon, and Beato (the one who called Battler Father multiple times, and didn't seem to have magical powers) disappeared they were absorbed into Shannon making her a complete person. Is what I would like to say because after the duel to the death Shannon never actually appears until the next episode in any capacity.

I know this isn't exactly the question, but I think that somehow the Beatrice fragments (or specifically onee-Beatrice) were able to take the souls of Beato, and Kanon to fulfill Beato's love trial to save Battler from the wedding at the end of Episode Six. Further, and I might be completely wrong for thinking this, but I'm pretty sure that there is no actual separate Kanon and Shannon. I'm going to have to go back and check, but I'm fairly confident there's never any scenes where the two appear to anyone who isn't somehow tied to magic. It's always either Shannon on her own, or Kanon on his own with the cousins, or the adults. I think that Shannon and Kanon are in some sort of Tyler Durden/Fight Club scenario where based on whoever they interact with that's the persona that comes out. Shannon is the more optimistic and romantic mind, and Kanon is the pessimistic, skeptical front. I'm all but certain that the "Beatrice" that Rosa says she killed in Episodes Four(?) and Seven and the baby that Natsuhi threw from the cliff might be the same person. Or at least that's what I think might be the case otherwise that cliff has a pretty impressive body count.

Battlers sin definitely has something to do with the fact that he knew Beatrice in some form or other back when he was twelve or so. Part of me wanted to theorize that he was somehow a witness to the incident in 1967 with Rosa, Beatrice, Natsuhi, and the baby but I can't think of anyway in which a two or three year old Battler could be held responsible for a freak double murder from that long ago. I think I can say with some confidence that whatever the sin actually is it most likely involved either the death or mutilation of Kanon or Shannon. Whether he's directly involved with said death and/or maiming I can't say for certain. Perhaps it's as simple as he did indeed witness the events but he got threatened/cowarded out from confessing what he saw. Because whatever it was definitely severe enough for him to cut ties with his entire extended family for six years. The culprit is trying to shock Battler into facing the terrible event that scarred him all those years ago. To force him to come to grips with it, and they keep making him relive the gruesome murders of the entire Ushiromiya family, and those that helped cover it up (Nanjo, Genji, Kumasawa, and Gohda) until he accepts what happened.

I think the reason why everyone dies in every fragment, except for Episode Four just has something to do with the boiler system in the mansion. It might seem like a really mundane and anti-climactic thing, but in a couple of the other episodes they find the corpse of Kinzo charred to a crisp in the boiler room. I don't think you could actually burn someone with steam, so I think this might be a hint that there's something faulty with the system in the house and it just so happened to explode during October 4th-5th. It somehow combined into a gas explosion that just shredded the bodies in the mansion and guest house and that's why Eva was able to survive in Episode Four when she was in Kuwadorian. A faulty heating situation leading up to a massive fireball explosion is theoretically possible due to the instances when Genji or another servant mentions that the phone lines are old and in disrepair, so it's entirely possible that the boiler/heating system is in similarly rough shape. They also mention that the stoves in the mansion are gas powered so a faulty boiler could cause a massive explosion that shreds the corpses to bits. Because at least in Episode One it's mentioned that they only found fragments of Maria's jaw, and other assorted bits of the other family members.

I have yet more I desperately want to add to this, but I don't know if I should edit it in here, or make it a separate post.

#umineko #umineko no naku koro ni #umineko when they cry #umineko theory

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after-nine-at-the-oasis · 9 months

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I JUST FINISHED EPISODE EIGHT AND AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I LOVED IT SOOOOO MUCH 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰!!!!

OKAY FIRST OF ALL ISAAACCCCC MY BOYYY 🥰🥰🥰😭❤️❤️. He's been going through it but AAAHHHHH HE GRABBED THE ASEXUAL BOOK!!! I am so proud of him 🥰🥰🥰 though sir did you steal that- anyway he is in fact the most adorable ever and I love him with my whole heart 🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️ <3333 :)) :DD!!! He <33.

TAO AND ELLE ARE SO ADORABLEEE!!!! AND ELLE'S GOING TO LAMBERT :'DDD!!! AND ALSO THEY'RE OFFICIALLY BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND!!!!!! WHOOOOO :'DDDD 🥳🥳🥳🎉🎊!!! AND WHEN THEY FIRST SAW EACH OTHER FOR PROM 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ STOP I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰. Also their dancing SLAYED like yes they were holding up the dance floor out there 😌 (I think one of them said something like that to one of them but if not eh I still say it lol). And their pictures 🥰🥰. So cute <3. Also poor Tao trying to read her dad xD. But yeah love them so much <3333.

MY TEACHERSSSS!!!! MY TEACHER BABEYSSSS!!!! MR. AJAYI AND MR. FAROUK :'DDDDD!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭😭❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰. ALSO THE SCENE OF THE COUCH (SINGH?) TELLING HIM TO INVITE HIM SLFJGHDKHLS LOVELY. Speaking of though is every teacher at this school gay xD. Like I don't mind it at all but xD- anyway they are in fact THE most adorable <333. Also SO glad they're slightly more functional than our teenagers (though tbh who knows if it's because they're adults) and didn't just go "oh yeah :')" about it being something they shouldn't have done lol. But AAHHHH he invited him out :'D and AAAHHHHHH they're so cute 🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️😭❤️❤️. Good crying, lol <3. I love them your honor :)).

IMOGENNN :OOO??! MY GIRL!! ARE YOU CRUSHING ON SAHAR?? :DDD?? Either way love you girl happy for you over all 🥰🥰🥰. Hope you do find someone if you want though :)) ❤️❤️❤️🥰. Love her <3.

Also I know we barely saw her but Tori always so hard 😌😌😌. As always, lol xD. I love her so much <333. Just- HER <333 🥰🥰❤️😭. Good tears xD :)).

TARA AND DARCY MY BABES 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️. POOR TARA THE WHOLE DAY WAITING FOR DARCY AND WORRYING ABOUT HER 😭😭😭💔❤️. AND POOR DARCY OF COURSE ALONE AND LITERALLY SLEEPING AT A PARK 😭😭😭😭💔💔❤️. But then her finally showing up :')). BUT TARA HAVING GONE TO FIND HER 😭😭😭❤️❤️. I cry because they love each other so much and she wanted to make sure Darcy was okay but also because they missed each other xd. And VJEUANDPK DARCY'S MOMMMM- I AM READY TO KILL AND MAIM THANK YOU <3333. READY TO MURDER HER!! <3333. Poor Darcy 😭❤️. But their conversation :')). I feel so bad for her 😭 honey she LOVES you, no matter what <333. You're going through a lot and I'm sure this new part of your life (for her) is gonna take some getting used to but you love each other and you can always count on each other :')). And AAAHHHHH ALL THOSE "I LOVE YOU"S 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️😭😭❤️. GOOD CRYING DON'T WORRY :'DDD. Y'ALL I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰. T h e m <333.

CHARLIE AND NICK ARE MY BABEYS THANK YOU VERY MUCH <33333!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰🥰🥰😭😭❤️❤️. Good crying :')). AAAHHHHHHHHH NICK LIKE FULLY TOTALLY CAME OUT :'DDDD!!! I LOVE HIM ❤️❤️❤️❤️😭🥰. AND S T O P CHARLIE'S REACTION :'DDDD. Listen I love them all so much <333. All came to my mind for that sentence and it's true so we're rolling with it. But seriously them finally getting to be Out, like do whatever 🥰🥰🥰🥰. I'm so happy for them :')) <33. And then them deciding to leave xDD. Honestly slay lol. At least they went for a bit, that's good enough for me LOL xD.

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH ALL OF THEM AT THEIR OWN LITTLE PERSONAL PROM :'DDDD!! Like together I mean lol. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰. THEY WERE ALL SO CUTE 🥰🥰🥰. And tbh that looks like so much fun :DD. I do wish Tara and Darcy got to have a chance to be at prom together for a little while but eh yaknow :DD. This was so adorable so I'll be fine 🥰🥰 xD. Also AWW all their goodbye hugs 🥰🥰❤️. I love them all so much <333 😭🥰❤️❤️🥰.

Had to put that before the sad stuff lol xD. Now, back to Nick and Charlie 🥰. First of all that rugby camp story is adorable and hilarious 🥰 xD, and my boys are so adorable 🥰🥰. Now xd 😭. Seeing (hearing) more of Charlie's backstory was so good and SO heartbreaking 😭💔❤️. And speaking of, Nick talking to Tao was so sad and so good <333. And the same goes for his talk with Tara - it was leading up to this all episode :') 😭❤️. And it seriously was amazing. Like I haven't mentioned this so far but the ACTING!!! Y'all the acting from everyone, in this entire show (as in always) is AMAZING!! Just stunning, absolutely phenomenal. Anyway, I did know the basics of Charlie's backstory, just stuff I've found out (like form tumblr or tiktok), but seeing it portrayed in the show is just heartbreaking. It's done so well but I just feel so bad for my boy 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔❤️❤️❤️. And Nick supporting him <3333. It's just- FLAWLESS 😭, I LOVE THEM <3333!! AND THEN- AAAHHHHHH!!!! ALMOST AN I LOVE YOU!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Their goodbye :')) stop they're so cute <333. Also I found it fun that they were mismatched, like Charlie looked formal form the bottom half and Nick looked formal for the top half lol xD. Anyway 🥰. I love them so much <33. Also tell me why I was so stressed xD. Like I was like "please don't be a bad cliffhanger please don't be a bad cliffhanger" xD. Out here like "CHARLIE WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING PLEASE" XDD. You just can't take any chances lol 😭 xDD. But then AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! I knew he wasn't gonna send it especially since I was pretty sure there would be a cliffhanger but still AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I HAD HOPE XDDD!! STILL THOUGH AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😭😭❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰!!! I'M NOT OKAY <3333.

I seriously loved this episode, and this entire season, SO much :'))). I'm sure I'll have more to say so I'll either edit this or make more posts lol, but right now, I'm just so happy <333. It was so good, I loved it so much :)). Also, I managed to watch the entire show in less than 12 hours, which included doing several other things xDD. So, slay for me lol XD.

Oh, and as I joked to my mom, THE COUPLES!! ALL THE COUPLES!! SO MANY COUPLES LOL!! And even just relationship plots like with Isaac xD! I love them all though don't get me wrong lol <333. I was just post episode 6 talking to my mom like "and then even the TEACHERS got together" XDD. I love them all, seriously <3333 🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️.

What an amazing episode, and an amazing season :). They all had such great growth, and I loved everyone's individual storylines :')). Heartstopper is just genuinely such a beautiful story - or like, a billion (okay like a dozen lol) beautiful stories wrapped up in one :')). It's so crazy to me that this can exist, that I get to see something this beautiful and sweet and silly and queer :'D. I love it so much, and I'm so grateful <333.

Thank you so much to the cast and creators, y'all rock :)). It's amazing, congratulations and spectacular job 🥰🥰🥰❤️.

I love this show so much y'all :'D.

AH okay :')). It's just past midnight and I wanna go reblog some posts lol, so I'll finish this up :D.

AND THAT'S THE END OF HEARTSTOPPER SEASON 2!!! SEE Y'ALL NEXT TIME :'D 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥰🥰❤️!!!!!

#heartstopper #oasis's heartstopper chatter #heartstopper spoilers #you will also see me in about two minutes when I reblog some heartstopper posts lol #also I will be committing fraud later and changing the date of this to third because goshdarnit I basically finished it (this) yesterday lol #and I wanna have it and my first few reblogs day of okay xD #anyway #I loved this show so much 🥰🥰🥰❤️#so excited for whatever comes next :D #and I really do need to get around to reading the books lol #despite the pain xD #but anyway :)#MY BABEYS ❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 <33 #ALL 🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️!!!#LOVELY THANK YOU VERY MUCH :DDDD 🥰🥰🥰 :'DD <3333!!#also I think I forgot to say it in any of my end of/post episode posts but I love tao's mom SO MUCH #with my entire heart #with my entire soul #WITH ALL MY LOVE #I love her so much xDD #I just adore her <33 #and also she is such a mood lol slfkghdjkflks #anyway xDD #this has been so fun and such a great journey 🥰🥰🥰#now - I'm off!!!#time to go reblog a few posts before going to freak out about them some more and probaly watch youtube videos or tikok or read fanfic lol :D #about them of course xD #mainly because let's be real I get distracted lol #I love you all :DDD ❤️❤️❤️❤️!!!!#byeeee :))) 🥰🥰🥰🥰 <333!!!!

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