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literallyjustanerd · 1 year
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Fives And Echo Try To Make It Through One (1) Single Night Shift (or, Fourteen Is Not The Limit)
Based, unfortunately, on personal experience.
Summary: Fives sneaks an admittedly cool, but still very contraband, switchblade into the GAR barracks, and both he and Echo end up on night shift as punishment because the Domino twins are nothing if not a package deal. Fives finds a way to make the night worse than it already is.
Words: 1514 Genre: Comedy
           Echo drums his fingers on the side of his seat, the rhythmic focus currently the only thing keeping him from nodding off for a third time. Soft music drones from the subspace radio in the centre console, no longer enough to keep his mind occupied. Not even the thrice-refilled mug of caf beside him can do anything to stave off his exhaustion by now. Bleary eyes drag sluggishly down to the chrono, tracking streaks of neon blue in their wake. The light of comms display casts a blanket of haze over them, one Echo would be more than happy to curl up and sink into. A few deliberate blinks force the chrono back into focus. Another hour and their shift is finally over. Outside the sealed-off comms room, their bunks wait for them, warm and (relatively) clean and –who is he kidding– he would happily sleep on the floor of the mess hall in full armour if it was offered. Helmet included.
“Nearly done,” he says through a yawn, head lolling in Fives’ direction. Facing away from him, hunched forward over the console, Fives gives an uncharacteristically brief and quiet hum. Come to think of it, the past ten minutes have been utterly peaceful. Fives must be even more drained than Echo if he’s run out of words to challenge the silence. Oh, well. He deserved it.
            This was the last time Echo would be taking the fall for one of Fives’ bantha-brained stunts. Sure, he’d made that particular declaration going on fourteen times now, but this time he was drawing his line in the proverbial sand. There were only so many times a man could be relegated to night shift comms duty or fresher maintenance before he found his limit. And, it seemed, fourteen was Echo’s. At least he got to learn something about himself while he suffered. Although… admittedly, if they were going to be reprimanded for anything, smuggling in a contraband pocket vibroknife wasn’t the worst possible reason. Fives had surreptitiously picked it up at a black market on their last posting, secreting it away in his pack before it could be questioned. The blade itself shone an impressive duochrome in the light, and switched easily away into an obsidian casing of a quality weight and sculpting. Okay, it was a cool knife. Echo was a big enough man to admit that. And sure, maybe he’d had his turn to try it out, flicking the blade in and out of its handle, making a few testing swipes. Just to get a feel for it. And he supposed maybe, if he really thought about it, he might have made some comments to Fives that could have been misconstrued as challenging his knife-throwing skills. But on the whole, as usual, it was all Fives’ fault they were in this mess. After all, it wasn’t Echo who had mistimed a throw that ended in Tup very nearly losing an eye. That was all Fives. And yet, package deal that they were, both had been reprimanded and sentenced to two weeks of the graveyard watch.
            He’s snapped from this particular meandering train of half-conscious thought when the radio picks up a heavy, stuttering bassline that has a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
“Haven’t heard this one since back on Rishi Outpost.” Lowering his feet from where they were propped on the console, he swivels his chair towards Fives. “Kept us going on night shift out there, too.” He gets another bare grunt in response. Fives barely moves. In fact, his limbs seem stiff, awkward, the angles of his back and legs too harsh to be comfortable.
“You good over there?”
“Fine.” At least that got a word out of him. A lie, but a word nonetheless.
“What’s going on, Fives?” Echo’s voice is a warning now, one that Fives reacts to with his usual poise and grace under pressure.
“Nothing!” he sputters, much too fast and far too loud, posture straightening like someone had just grabbed his neck and yanked backwards. Apparently sensing how suspicious it was that he was still facing away from his vod, he, with an alarmingly deep breath in, pivots his chair in short scoots around to face Echo. His hands are jammed into his lap, shoulders raised. A moment after their eyes meet, he gives a pathetically unconvincing smile. “Just tired. That’s all. Almost done, right?”
The silence that Echo rewards him with speaks a thousand words. Most of them curses. Because while Fives tries his level best to look like a man who isn’t in a tremendous amount of discomfort, Echo catches a glint of duochrome on the console behind him. A few drops of something dark and viscous coat the tip of the blade.
Oh, karking hell.
An impressively long test of will ensues as the two stare at each other. In time, though, Echo’s narrowed gaze melts through the already thin ice of Fives’ resolve. It only takes a momentary lapse, a tiny glance downwards, and Echo has his answer.
            Fives grows instantly frantic when Echo stands from his post and makes the three short strides across the room to his brother, wrenching Fives’ hand from where it had been pressed firmly against the gap between his cuisse and his crotchplate. In the space underneath, there’s a short gash in his blacks. A whimper of pain escapes through Fives’ clenched teeth. Echo can do little more than shake his head as blood wells up to darken the polyweave fabric where Fives’ palm had been stemming the flow.
“You kriffing idiot.”
“You can’t tell Rex.”
“I can’t believe you.”
“Or Kix. Please don’t tell Kix.”
“I can’t believe you still have it, let alone that you–”
“It was an accident! It’s not like I meant to–”
“Oh, you didn’t mean to stab yourself? Well that makes it fine!” It isn’t even solely anger that drives Echo’s voice high and blows his tone wide and mocking. The absurdity of the situation gets to him, and he can’t help the laugh that roughs the edges of his words, because of course this is how their shift ends, because of course this would happen to Fives.
“How long?” Echo demands, massaging the bridge of his nose to cover his smile. Fives gives a nervous chuckle, but when Echo repeats the question in his I’m-done-playing voice, his brother’s shoulders sag.
“Ten minutes ago.”
“And you just… sat there?”
“We were so close to being done, I–“
“You sat there with a stab wound for ten minutes.” The insanity of the situation leaves Echo at a loss for any worthy comment, so he resorts instead to gesticulating frantically to Fives, to the open wound, to the room around them and the general mess they were now in. Fives gives his own exaggerated shrug, as best as he can with his hands once again set to the task of trying to stem the bleeding.
“If I’d said anything, they would have sent me straight to medbay.”
Echo cocks an eyebrow.
“Right. A terrible place to be when you’ve been stabbed.”
“It’s been a long night, Echo. A full med eval, filing an incident report, sitting through another reprimand? It could take hours.”
Echo opens his mouth to protest, then stops. Closes it again. Fives can tell when he has an in and he takes it.
“Or…We wait it out just a little longer and we’re done. We go back to our bunks. We sleep.”
Turns out, fourteen isn’t the limit after all.
            The morning lighting sequence is just beginning to take effect when Jesse comes to relieve the ARC troopers and take the next shift, yawning and cradling a mug of caf. In the split second when comms room doors slide open, a flurry of movement ends in Fives and Echo standing side by side, sporting matching grins, posed in a grotesque mockery of what they must think passes for ‘natural.’ Under Fives’ strategically placed arm, Jesse can see the edges of several haphazard strips of tape on his blacks at the top of his leg. There’s a roll of it on the console beside them, along with what looks like wadded up flimsi or tissues, some of it stained with what Jesse has decided to believe is ink.
“…Survive the night, fellas?” he asks carefully. He gets an overloud chorus of greetings and affirmations in reply. With a sigh of resignation, he wonders if the inability to lie to save their kriffing lives is just a 501st trait or if all clones suffer the same affliction. Either way, he decides to take his plausible deniability and cherish it.
“Well… enjoy the rest, then, boys. See you in the barracks.”
“Sure thing, vod!”
“Have a good shift.”
“We’ll save you a seat in the caf.”
“Don’t work too hard!”
            The pair of them hustle out of the comms room like they’re fleeing a losing battle, their babbling audible even as they disappear down the hall. Jesse tries not to notice that Fives is limping the whole way.
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veny-many · 2 months
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Shitpost inspired by this Fallout 4 video.
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What have i made
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ominouspuff · 4 months
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Repurposing GAR armor towards the end of pulverizing wrinkly Sith
— A guide by CC-1010, ecstatically-ex-marshal commander of Coruscant
A what-if au featuring the Corries pulling all-nighters fueled on caf alone to study republic law, Fox providing his own dubious legal representation resulting in the wildest civil court case in Republic history, and, they can only pray, formidable and clandestine cooperation within GAR high command’s clone contingents via a small-scale GAR-approved candy brand
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evesartblog · 2 months
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Im far too mentally unstable to draw sad fanart, so enjoy some bad batch shenanigans instead ✨✨🫴
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smw-on-kamino · 27 days
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The Sad Batch + Text Posts pt 1 | pt 2 | pt 3 | pt 4
~Crosshair special~
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dixieconley · 4 months
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How did Obi-Wan not notice the thing with R2D2?? And what if he did?
Obi-Wan: We need to talk about your issues with attachment. Anakin: ::panicking, thinking Obi-Wan's found out about his marriage:: You had a relationship with Satine Kryze! Obi-Wan: … And Ki-Adi-Mundi is married. Jedi can have relationships, Anakin. We've talked about this. Anakin: … I think I would have remembered that.
[Many many past conversations: Obi-Wan: ::lecturing:: Attachment… the code… meditation. Anakin: ::busy tinkering:: Yes, yes, master. Whatever you say, master. Obi-Wan: This is fine. This absolutely will not come back to bite me in the ass later.]
Obi-Wan: Regardless, we need to talk about your attachment issues. Anakin: What issues? You just *said* marriage is okay. Obi-Wan: ::derailed:: What's that about marriage? Anakin: This isn't about me and Padme being married? Obi-Wan: … Obi-Wan: No. Anakin: This is about what I did when my mom died then, isn't it? Obi-Wan: … Anakin: ::getting defensive:: They deserved it! Tuskens are animals. Obi-Wan: ::rubbing his nose:: Anakin. Stop guessing. You're literally making this worse with every word out of your mouth. There happens to be a Tusken Jedi. You've *met* him. Anakin:: ::sheepish:: Oh. So, um, what's this about then? ::finally listening for the first time in the past three years:: Obi-Wan: I came here to talk to you about the salvage operation you ran to rescue R2D2. Anakin: ::puzzled:: Master? You ordered me to go on that mission. Obi-Wan: ::pinching his nose:: Anakin, you do realize that the mission would have been completely unnecessary had you just wiped the droid as per procedure? Anakin: But R2's my buddy. I wouldn't do that to him. Obi-Wan: You got all but two of the men who went with you killed in an attempt to rescue a droid! Anakin: So? I would have done the same for Padme. Or Ahsoka, Obi-Wan: … Obi-Wan: You see no issue in trading sentient lives for an inanimate object. That, Anakin is the very definition of attachment and why you either see a mind healer or go to Jedi jail. Anakin: What? You can't make me see a mind healer! Obi-Wan: You're right. Jedi Jail it is. Anakin: Noooo! I'm gonna tell my good friend the Chancellor on you! Obi-Wan: ::fed-up with everything and feeling both sassy and sarcastic:: Oh, and what's he going to do, order the clones to turn on us and massacre all the Jedi right down to the initiates in the creche? The Force: ::shouting:: YES!!! Obi-Wan:: ::facepalm:: That absolutely came back and bit me in the ass.
Later: Cody: You have a Jedi jail? Obi-Wan: No. Cody: Sir? Obi-Wan: Seemed like a safe bet. ::bitter: He obviously ignored everything else I tried to teach him. Cody: Jedi can marry? Obi-Wan: Yes. Cody: Jedi. As in you. Obi-Wan: As in... Cody: ::suddenly two inches closer:: Obi-Wan: ::squeaking:: Me? Cody: ::smoulders:: Obi-Wan: After the war. Chain of command. Would be inappropriate. Because reasons. Cody: I see.
Two days later: Fox: ::eyeing the assortment of munitions Cody's just laid on his desk, including, but not limited to, slug throwers, thermal detonators, a handful of droid poppers and a rotary cannon:: So you say that the chancellor's a direct threat to the military command of the GAR and that I get to kill him if I agree to mute my external audio pickup and follow your orders? Cody: Yes. Is there a problem? ::looms menacingly:: Fox: ::jumps up:: No takesies backsies! Thorn! Thire! It's Lifeday and Cody's just got us all a present!
~~~
Palps gets wrekt. The Corries have the Best. Day. Ever.
Cody and Obi-Wan swear the riduurok. No one is surprised.
The mind healers ending *building* a Jedi jail just so they don't have to listen to Anakin whine any longer. (R2D2 has the option of joining Anakin. Which, no. C3PO is welcome to that. R2D2 is having none of that shit. Time to head back to his original family -- the handmaidens of Naboo. Who will let him have a little murder. As a treat.)
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meebles · 11 months
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codywan au where sith!obi-wan gets sucked into the canonverse through some extra-dimensional force bullshit
cody and obi-wan are stuck in a desperate, barely-restrained "we must put duty first, we must wait until after the war" cycle of mutual pining— but cody is the one who first finds sithywan and sithywan is immediately an absolute menace of a flirt, who lets himself get “captured” by the gorgeous commander he’d like to get to know better
cody has no idea how to deal with this. meanwhile obi-wan, mr “flirting with the enemy is a perfectly valid battle strategy” now has to watch that exact scenario play out but from an outsider’s perspective, specifically with an evil alternate-reality version of himself, and he thinks he’s going to lose his fucking mind
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catgriller · 6 months
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An AU where Anakin leaves the Jedi before Ahsoka
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clonemando · 3 days
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Imagine: Fox has Force-given plot armor, basically nothing is able to kill him.
Palpatine tries to lightning him at point blank and it... Just doesn't work. Fox gives him a tired look and finishes his report.
Palpatine tries to chop him with his lightsabers but they just go out as soon as they get close to Fox and Fox sighs deeply and explains that he can't die. That when he was a cadet he saved a aiwha and it turned into some green force goddess chick who blessed him and ever since no one can harm him. He's jumped from the top of Tipoca city, sat at the bottom of Kamino's ocean, left a ship while in space and walked around outside. His brothers have taken to surprise attacking him for the hell of it. Nothing.
Palpatine grins thinking of how great this is having Fox as his servant after all and tries to activate Fox's chip.
Nothing.
Fox sighs again. The Republic is corrupt and even with basic immortality Fox can't just fix it so he just does his job. He's not going to be controlled or whatever. He'll see Palpatine with the usual report tomorrow.
From then on it's just Fox tiredly going about his day while Palpatine tries more and more creative different ways to try to kill him or make him obey him.
Palpatine completely blows off Anakin because he's so obsessed with Fox and Anakin gets all pissy over it and starts trying to kill Fox too.
Thorn and the rest of the Guard find it hilarious and encourage it even joining in sometimes.
Fox: *sitting in the middle of the flaming cafeteria sipping a cup of caff* This is fine.
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hagdraws · 2 months
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study doodles 👹
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tragedy-for-sale · 2 months
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The Point of no Return
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Because I will never shut up about the Hardeen arc- I really need to emphasize the importance of this moment right here. When we think of the Hardeen arc, we only ever think about the aftermath, after the lie and after the pain. But I have never thought about the before. The moments right before.
Obi-Wan takes a deep breath, he brings his lightsaber to his chest and he gathers himself. He has to take a moment to think about what he's about to do.
This is a complete turn of feelings from when we see him wittingly ask how his funeral was, it's that simple and easy commentary that makes them all think this was easy for him to do. He shoves down what he's feeling right here and instead he jokes and laughs. He's fun and easy, he's funny, he's great, but he's not, he's not, he's in a lot of pain and he hurt everyone close to him in the worst way. Obi-Wan would never hurt them, but he has, and he'll never be forgiven.
He made this choice for the greater good, but the greater good is seldom so. It's in this moment we understand his full awareness of the deception he is about to undergo, how there is no forgiveness for the action he is about to commit, how after all this is over, Obi-Wan cannot expect forgiveness and understanding because this is for the greater good, this is for the Jedi and all they protect.
This isn't a choice for Obi-Wan. It is an assignment to a Jedi Master. Attachment is forbidden, become a part of the cosmic force, and the galaxy will benefit from your sacrifice. But the undercurrent of remorse is there, and all the people he left behind will never forgive Obi-Wan for dying.
So, Obi-Wan holds his lightsaber to his chest because it is his life, it's a silent goodbye to who he is because of what he is. He chooses the Jedi and that choice kills him. It's in that moment that he says goodbye to Anakin and Ahsoka, to Cody and himself. His identity, his lightsaber, are about to no longer exist. Obi-Wan would willingly sacrifice who he is for the sake of the Jedi but that doesn't mean it is easy for him to do. So he holds his lightsaber close because he's not becoming a part of the cosmic force, he's becoming something much worse.
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literallyjustanerd · 1 year
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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, CC-2224 | Cody & Obi-Wan Kenobi, CT-7567 | Rex & Anakin Skywalker, CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Anakin Skywalker, CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody, Ahsoka Tano Additional Tags: Crack, Comedy, please god give cody and rex a break, jedi behaving badly, One Shot, Ahsoka Tano is a Sibling to the Clones Summary:
An uncomfortably long time had passed since they’d been (rather rudely) hung up on, and still the stalemate drags on. Several more long moments pass until both simultaneously reach their breaking point. “It’s your faul-” “This is your fault!” - With how often Obi-Wan and Anakin find themselves in need of new lightsabers, it was really only a matter of time before this happened. Good thing they can count on their clone captain and commander to rescue them. ...Right?
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veny-many · 1 month
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Everyone has the true home of the heart in their memory right?
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Caution: vibrating Clones are very strong.
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coruscantsbookstore · 2 years
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obi-wan, preparing for a solo mission: and anakin, one last thing. temporary command over the 212th does not mean you can treat them like the 501st. please leave the planning to cody.
anakin: don't worry master, i'm sure the commander and i can work something out
[three days later in the resolute's medbay]
cody: *stares at anakin*
anakin: *stares at cody*
cody: i won't tell him you head-butted the separatist leader while in handcuffs and a blindfold without a lightsaber if you won't tell him i jumped right into that tank of acid to block the drain and disable the cannon attached to it
anakin: you got yourself a deal, commander
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captainkirkk · 2 months
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My favourite "Qui-Gon Jinn Lives AUs" are when he doesn't even show up until part-way through the fic, but everyone else takes one look at him and then decides "This explains so fucking much about why Obi-Wan is the way he is"
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131-vr · 9 months
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Another silly interaction between, brothers. It'll have a continuation with Echo on it, stay tunes
Part 2
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