#felt so good to not respond and just haha react

[albertxylin]

Whispered Violence

A voice whispers in my ear. It is the droning of a fly, The cry of a wailing baby on a plane as you try to sleep, The inane natterings of someone Who has trapped you in a conversation at a bar.

I feel my blood pressure rising. I feel venom coat my tongue And practice using words as weapons.

I let go. I walk away, Leave the voice behind, And go about my day.

#2250 #don't argue with people on facebook folks #felt so good to not respond and just haha react #writing #daily poem #poems #poem #original poem #poetry #spoken word poetry #spoken word

[cofigelly]

ೀ SIX EYES

——————————————————————————pairing; college au!gojo satoru x reader

synopsis; you couldn’t help but notice a pair of wandering eyes during your 10am lecture

word count; ~2k words

contents; sfw, f!reader, no curses au, rich college student gojo, cocky/playful gojo, six eye/infinity references

notes; THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A QUICK LIL DRABBLE IDK WHAT HAPPENED? i <3 run ons and sentence fragments apparently

——————————————————————————

the first thing you noticed about him were his eyes.

well, technically, his eyes noticed you first.

in the midst of your monday 10am lecture (known for its lengthy, soul-wrenching talks about finance), you felt his sharp gaze pierce straight into your soul. it was a brief, quick glance — but it was an intentional glance, nonetheless.

you simply brushed it off. it must’ve been him zoning out, or maybe your mind was playing tricks on you. that was until you caught him repeating the same habit again. and again. over the course of the next three weeks.

that same, hungry gaze, taking in every intricacy of your features. a look that felt like it set your entire body on fire, despite the icy blue hue his pupils reflected each time you returned a glance. his stare would only last a few seconds at most, but something about it felt so intense, so overbearing— it made hold your breath each time.

in all honesty, you didn't mind the attention. in fact, you kind of reveled in it — a handsome, 6'3 guy always ogling at you every lecture. it even had you thinking that maybe he was into you?

but that was at first. as more weeks passed, the more your ego shrank. 'is there something on my face,' you wondered, patting at your cheeks to search for some sort of makeup residue or food crumb, 'do i look stupid?' the large, echoey lecture hall felt evermore revealing as you struggled to find a way to shrink into your plastic-clad seat. but you couldn't hide, not from a stare like that.

paranoia getting the best of you, you slide your phone out of your pocket as you send a hasty text to your best friend, “bro who is this guy? he keeps staring at me EVERY lecture,” you send a 0.5x photo, clearly taken from afar.

just as quickly, your friend responds, “NO FUCKIN WAY is that gojo???” “who the fuck is gojo?”

you could almost feel her attitude burst through the text bubbles, “bro… GOJO. his family is literally loaded?? did you not see his dad surpass bill gates on the global ranking of billionaires?” that text takes you a little by surprise, alternating your eyes between him and the message upon your screen. “okay maybe it’s starting to sound familiar, but still. what’s he doing cosplaying as a broke college kid in my finance class?” you sigh as you continue to tap on your screen, “idgaf that he’s loaded it’s pissing me off that he’s staring at me like 🧿🫦🧿 every lecture.”

your friend reacts with a quick “haha” to your text before responding, “idk man maybe you just caught the attention of the richest guy on campus ;)”

you decided you’ve had enough after reading that text. you’re not about to feed your delusions this early on a monday morning. you’ll admit, he’s a good —no, stunning— looking guy, but you have no time to babysit a boy who was never taught that staring was rude. not to mention, this boy isn't even in the same tax bracket as you. 

brushing it off yet another time, you let out a deep sigh as you flip the page, copying your professor’s notes on the board.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

a whole month has passed and this gojo guy is growing more and more cocky with his stolen glances. he's not even trying to hide it anymore.

this fateful wednesday, as you walk into class, he immediately locks onto you. his bright blue orbs follow you from the door to your row, not releasing his gaze in the slightest after you settle into your seat. your grit your teeth in annoyance as you flip through your notebook pages. who does this guy think he is? it’s been a month and he hasn’t even procured the balls to say a single word to you. yet, he’s feasting on you like you’re his final meal on death row. 

the second the class is excused, you immediately beeline towards his seat — stopping in front of his leaning frame while he packs his bag. “dude, what the hell is your problem,” scowling at him as you approach, “i’ve seen you stare at me for weeks now and it’s getting straight creepy."

his ears perk at the sound of your voice, haphazardly zipping up the final pocket of his backpack. when he looks up, his eyes glint with a hint of mischief as he scrunches his nose in a grin — a grin that’s somehow even cockier than his stare.

“i’m just taking in the view, princess,” he jeers, delight in his tone. 

you stare at him incredulously as you take his confession in. so he really has been staring at you? “for one, i’m not your princess," you scoff at his clear disregard of your concern, "second, you might want to think again before you decide to stare at me one more damn time.”

he hums amusingly, shaking his foot in a steady rhythm, “you’re right. i might think about it again.” his grin is even wider now, “why, what are you going to do about it?”

“—look, i don’t know what you’re getting at,” your eyebrows furrow deeper, “but if you keep this shit up, this won’t be the last time you hear from me.”

briskly, you swing around, completely ignoring his bickers as you head straight out the hallway door. 

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

to gojo, everything you said on wednesday was music to his ears.

he strolled into the next lecture, on monday, with the same shit-eating grin on his face. ‘this wont be the last time he hears from you?' god, he hopes that was true. it made him wonder why he didn’t just stare at you harder in the first place.

everything about you captivated gojo satoru.

from the first day of lecture, he was already mesmerized — by the wafting scent of your cologne as you walked past his row, the way your head cocked to the side whenever you thought through a problem set, the distant clicks as you tapped the end of your pencil against your arm nervously.

he simply couldn’t help but steal that initial glance. he also couldn’t help but steal another one the lecture after.

and another. and another.

he knew he was getting ahead of himself, being so selfish with his dangerous stares, but you just had that effect on him. an effect that he's never experienced with anyone else. he bit back his pride when he couldn’t even approach you first, as he normally did with his prior interests.

there was just something so serene, so heavenly about you. he almost wanted to leave you undisturbed, opting to observe you from afar — not wanting to disrupt his delicate masterpiece from behind the red rope at the museum.

but the day you approached him changed everything. ‘how can someone so innocent have such a mouth on her,’ he chuckles to himself, taking his ipad and apple pencil out of his backpack before laying them flat on the table.

you were completely unlike his initial impression of you, much to his amusement. he prefers it this way —actually— he likes a girl who has a bit of a bite. besides, he finally has an excuse to talk to you and do what he knows best: get under your skin. metaphorically (and literally).

he glances at the door as he hears the familiar clanking of your keychain against your water bottle, more excited for the lecture than he's ever been before.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

there is no fucking way.

gojo satoru is now sitting in the seat directly next to your unassigned assigned seat in this 300-person lecture hall. the entire classroom is almost packed too. how early did he have to be to even get that seat? why is he in that seat? your thoughts are cut off as he waves his hand at you, muttering a short "yoohoo~," ushering you to sit next to him.

hell no. you still have no idea what he's playing at. is he stalking you? does he have some sort of ulterior motive? what if his scary billionaire family kills you, a dirty plebeian, for sitting so close to their perfect, trust fund baby?

you immediately switch gears, practically running away to find a new seat, catching a glimpse of his pout in the corner of your eye. you ignore him and situate yourself in the very front row, directly in front of the professor's podium. you let out a deep exhale as you unpack your notebook when you hear a loud shuffle next to you.

this guy has no shame.

gojo, in all his glory, happily claims the empty seat next to you —unloading the entire apple store (or so it feels like) onto the desk. "good choice, doll. more leg room up here," he stretches his long, lanky legs before crossing them — making sure his knee briefly makes contact with yours.

"are you serious right now— bro your entire apple ecosystem is getting onto my side of the desk," you scowl at him once again as you shove his macbook closer to him. "serious about what?" he mocks, that signature smile gleaming down on you.

"whatever this is? are you obsessed with me or something," you mutter the last part under your breath, but he takes note of you rolling your eyes at him. "hmmm," he taps his chin all philosophically, "if anything you're the one obsessed with me."

wow, this guy really is insane. you felt your eyebrow twitch in anger as you jerked your head up, "me obsessed with you? how does that even make any sense—" "you said you noticed me staring for weeks," he muses, still looking straight at you, "but you don't think i noticed you staring back?"

you scoff, "i was simply just returning your gaze; not everything is about you!” “untrue.”

after refusing to make eye contact, you finally meet his eyes. "i'm not gonna play this damn game with you, look—"

you've never seen him this close before. you've never seen anyone this close before, really. in this cramped lecture hall, with its seats compressed like sardines, it felt like he was only mere millimeters away from you. your breath hitched as the air seemed palpable, heavy. he was so close, but it felt like he was untouchable — almost as if an infinite void was cast between you two.

for the first time, he dropped that condescending smirk. he dropped the facade altogether. beyond the icy blue hues, his eyes glistened a shade that he only shows to you, a shade you've never noticed in all those times you two locked eyes. they were powdery blue — the same softness as the edges of the clouds in the sky or the frothy, tidal waves lightly crashing against the beach sand.

it made you wonder if it was physically possible for one person to hold so much power in just their eyes. a power that felt like three whole people, six eyes-worth, were constantly peering into every fiber of your being. except this time, it was intense in a whole different way, completely unlike before. the closest feeling you could think of was a warm oven, fresh after a batch of cookies — an inexplicable warmth in contrast to his icy appearance.

lost in each others' eyes, he parts his lips as if to finally say something—

"i would really appreciate if you two kept your eyes on the board instead of on each other," a voice boomed from the podium in front of you.

you both tense up, quickly spinning your bodies around to face the front as the snickers began to fill the classroom. you completely forgot about how close you were sitting to the professor.

you felt a tinge of heat start on your cheeks, creeping its way up onto the cartilage of your ears. the embarrassment was more than enough to shut you both up for the rest of the period, but you knew.

you knew you wanted to feel this way again.

——————————————————————————

final notes; i wrote this in my actual lecture hall instead of taking notes guys😎😎 (i am severely ill)

#gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo imagines #gojo satoru imagine #jjk x reader #jujustu kaisen x reader #gojo imagine #gojo satoru imagines #jjk fluff #gojo fluff #satoru fluff #gojo satoru fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff

[rashomonss]

hello! could i please request mirror sex w/ satan and gn reader for your valentine’s day event? ty!

hello hello! and ofc you can haha（*’∀’人）

ahh this was so much fun to write, i love satan sm i swear! anyways I hope you enjoy!! ♡

if anyone would like to request a prompt for my valentine’s day event then it can be done here!

warnings: NSFW read at your own discretion / gender neutral

i love watching you take me…

“Oh? When did this get here? Did you just recently buy it?” You asked as you stepped into the Avatar of Wrath’s room.

A new full length mirror rested in a small space between his bookshelves and in front of his bed, but you couldn’t help but become curious since it wasn’t there a few days ago.

“Asmo gave it to me the other day, apparently it was because I helped him with something awhile back but I just haven’t found a place where I feel like it’ll look good” Satan explained as he looked at the mirror as well.

You plopped down on his bed and smiled. “I think it looks good here, besides you should decorate your room with things other than books”

“I have things you gave me, that should suffice” Satan huffed, as he took a seat on the other side of his bed.

“That doesn’t count,” you replied.

“Says who?”

“Says me” you said, and a moment later Satan reached over to grab you.

You both play fought and rolled around on his bed for a few minutes until he eventually had you pinned down. Within seconds the playful banter turned into a heated makeout session.

Hands traveled up and down your body as you held him close. When you and Satan finally pulled apart for air he moved to leave a few kisses and hickeys on your neck. He always loved it when his brothers would get mad at him for leaving hickeys on you.

Satan continued to travel down your body, discarding your clothes along the way, and left marks and bites in any way he could. When he made his way back up to your nipples he decided to tease them for a while, causing a few moans to escape on your end. As you squirmed under him the mirror suddenly caught his eye, and he immediately had a lovely idea.

He wasted no time in repositioning you to sit on the front of the bed facing the mirror. When you went to question him he placed a hand over your mouth and just whispered to just watch as he admired your body.

You looked into the mirror and watched as his hands made their way back to your nipples and then pinched them in between his fingers. The way your body reacted to his touch was enough to turn you on even more so than you already were.

The way Satan looked at you had you rubbing your thighs together as lust soon filled your eyes. He saw it too of course, and it was obvious with his cock continuously poking your back as he still kept his pants on.

“I want you” you said softly, earning a surprised smile from him.

Satan soon discarded his own clothes and placed his hands on your hips and then slowly let them make their way to your thighs. His touch was longing but it was just as desperate as yours, no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

Soon Satan spread apart your thighs and let his fingers graze your entrance before sticking two in you. A moan left your lips as his fingers suddenly stretched you out and prepared you to take him.

As your gaze shifted to the ceiling, he shifted to watching you in the mirror. Satan watched intensely as his fingers moved in and out of you, however he also loved watching the way your body reacted just from his fingers alone.

“I love how your body reacts to me” Satan said softly as he entered a third finger.

After teasting you with his fingers for a bit too much Satan finally pulled them out and then you felt his tip soon at your entrance.

“You ready?” He asked, holding your gaze in the mirror.

A quiet nod was your response, sure you would’ve responded with something else any other time, but your eyes were too focused on the way his tip rubbed against your entrance in the mirror.

You watched as he slowly entered you and immediately you tightened around him because of the sight.

Satan groaned as your hole swallowed his cock, he then set the tempo at a few slow and deep thrusts. Most of the time he loved to tease you, and today was no exception. He loved watching your face become more needy with each passing moment as he slowly went in and out of you.

You on the other hand felt as if you were going crazy. You wanted him to pound into you so badly but he drug out every single thrust, making sure to hit deep every time as well, it was enough to make you squirm and beg for more.

“Look at you, taking me in so well” Satan purred in your ear.

Another deep thrust came after his praise and you cried out in ecstasy as he continued with his deep and slow pace. Satan smirked as he watched his cock slowly disappear inside you, it made it even better when your eyes rolled back each time he thrusted himself deeper.

“Watch yourself take my cock” Satan said softly as he grabbed your chin with his hand and held it up so you could see yourself in the mirror.

Your eyes trailed down your body adorned with hickeys and bite marks from earlier, and when they finally made it down there, the sight alone made you gasp and tighten around him. Satan made sure to slowly pull out as you watched the pre cum from his cock leave a slick trail behind, only somehow turning you on more.

Unlike the previous times though he then roughly thrusted up into you causing a sudden moan to escape as he held you in place. The fast pace from a moment ago continued and Satan made sure to hit your favorite spot each time he entered you.

Ah, he loved this sight, you bouncing up and down on his cock with lust filled eyes and a fucked out brain. The Avatar of Wrath held your chin up and continued to make you watch as he pounded into you with each passing second. The room was filled with lewd sounds and loud moans but he didn’t care, he wanted his brothers to know just how much you loved seeing yourself get fucked by his cock.

“You’re so fucking beautiful you know that?” He mumbled out, before then biting your shoulder, making you shudder in response.

Your pretty little hole tightened around him with each thrust as you got closer. Nothing but a few mumbles of his name and other curses left your lips as Satan guided your hips up and down on his cock. He knew you were getting close and he was as well.

“Let me see you cum on my cock, can you do that for me MC?” Satan said as he held your gaze in the mirror.

A muffled yes left your lips along with a fast nod of your head as well. Satan smiled and picked up the pace just enough for you, and finally after a few moments the built up feeling in your core snapped and you reached your climax.

Your body arched into his as your hips buckled onto his cock, allowing him to ride out his own orgasm as he thrusted into you for a few moments after.

Soft breaths left your lips as you came down from your high. After a moment Satan slowly pulled out of you as you watched in the mirror, soon a small amount of cum slowly started pooling out of your hole as he smirked.

“Ready for round two?”

#rashomonss red hour #rashomonss sweet valentines treat #rashomonss asks #obey me #obey me shall we date #omswd #obey me smut #omswd smut #obey me satan x reader #obey me satan #omswd satan

[0nlythrowharrybeaux]

A Twist of Fate - The End**

IT'S FINALLY DONE! I hope you guys like this final part of the A Twist of Fate series

Warnings: mentions of drug and alcohol, mental health/therapy themes, coming out as poly conversation, fingering, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex.

WC: 25.5K

There's a playlist for this one!

When you woke up the following morning your head hurt and your body felt sore. You knew you were dancing a lot and moving in ways that your body was not accustomed to. Moreover, you were reminded of why you’d decided to stop drinking when you went out. You laid in bed in silence for several minutes, recapping all of the events from the party, and your stomach turned again as you envisioned the disillusioned look in Taylor’s eyes when she saw you coming into the bathroom.

She wasn’t mean or rude to you in any way, but a lot things flashed through your mind that made you react the way you had. The song a few months ago, the momentary lapse in your character that made you judge her when she and Harry were on vacation, and the kiss. You genuinely hadn’t felt all that bad about the kiss with Harry before, it had been a lapse in judgement, a mistake… that was until you were standing in front of her. You remembered how much you’d been fantasizing about kissing him again and apparently he felt the same way. It just felt like too many things to hold in, so they came out however they could. You were dying to apologize for ruining their evening, but you knew that speaking to either of them would cause more harm than good.

Your phone dinging with a text made you exhale. So you got a good stretch in, hearing a couple little cracks as you reached your limit and held it before relaxing and sitting up. You opened your phone and smiled when you saw Ricky’s text.

Ricky:

Hey:) Did you make it out alive? 

You had been seeing Ricky casually. It was quite an unexpected but almost obvious pairing. You’d spent a lot of time together now that you were back in the studio and you had also developed a friendship after working together for a couple years now. But after helping his sister out is when you starting hanging out more. One night when he was dropping you off after you guys had seen Provoker you just had this tense moment and he kissed you and you kissed back and well, now you’d been hooking up for a little over a month. 

Y/N: 

I did! Barely, but still haha

Ricky: 

But still:) When are you back?

Y/N:

Tuesday morning. Why…?

Ricky:

We should do something.

Y/N:

Yeah, that sounds nice. Maybe we can go to Venice? Grab some brunch and get high on the beach.

Ricky:

I think I might have to break our no romantic feelings rule over that.

You giggled as you read his reply and before you could respond a few knocks on the door startled you.

“Come in!” You called out.

“You’re up already?” Caitlyn asked with a smile and you nodded as she came over and climbed into the empty side of the bed. “How’d you sleep?”

“I should be asking you. The couch wasn’t too bad?” 

“It was alright. Better than being the audience to your tears all night.” She teased and you chuckled.

“Well, I didn’t really cry last night any more. I think it was just all really overwhelming in the moment.” You said and she nodded.

“Good. So you’re feeling OK? No bad crash?” She asked and you shook your head.

“I mean, I do feel a little down, but I don’t think it has anything to do with the molly…” you said and she hummed. “I’m just not happy with-” you paused and turned your attention back to you phone when it dinged in your hands and saw Ricky’s message.

Ricky:

I’m sorry. Did I make it weird?

Y/N:

No, not at all! Sorry, Cait just came in to check on me:)

Ricky:

Okay, thank fuck haha

Ricky:

Well I’ll let you go, I actually have to work out now so…

Y/N:

Stoooop, you do not lol It’s the worst, so I wouldn’t hold it against you if you didn’t.

Ricky:

Okay. I’ll just pretend not to know anything about your track history lol

Y/N:

Yeah, do that. I’ll text you later:)

Ricky:

Sounds good! 

“Look at you, all smiley after you said you’re a little down…” Caitlyn pointed out and you chuckled.

“It’s just Ricky.” You explained.

“Ah, still riding that…hmmm.” she hummed and you chuckled.

“God, so crass…” 

“I know.” She grinned and then your smile dropped as you recalled the previous topic at hand.

“I just feel really bad for yesterday. I hope I didn’t cause too big of a fuss with Harry and Taylor. I’m sure my reaction made me seem guilty of what she assumed.” You sighed, already overthinking it all over again. You’d replayed the scenario over and over at least a solid thousand times in the shower last night.

“Oh, they’ll be fine.” Caitlyn scoffed through a laugh, “You did the right thing in trying to avoid him. Who cares what she took the whole puking thing as. Hopefully she is able to believe Harry that you weren’t together and if she doesn’t well, that’s her issue, not yours.” She advised and you nodded.

“Right.” You smiled a bit.

“Well, what should we do today? Have breakfast and go for a little walk? Help wear off any hangover symptoms?”

“Yeah, that actually sounds good.”

“OK.” She smiled and got out of the bed, “I should shower first. S’gonna be a long one after the night we had.” She mumbled and you nodded.

“Oh yeah, please. Take your time.” You insisted.

**************

HARRY’S POV:

Harry hardly slept a wink. He hadn’t been able to reach anyone to stay with at the last minute and all the hotels he knew he could safely stay at were booked out, so he stayed on the couch in the suite. The couch was far too firm for his liking, but he still laid down there and just thought. He thought and thought for hours and hours if all of this had been worth it. He didn’t have Taylor and he didn’t have you. He felt heartbroken but he knew that this was the best outcome. He clearly couldn’t make up for the past, at least not in Taylor’s eyes. And it was better that they end things than for him to keep trying to meet an impossible expectation. Taylor wanted him to stop loving you, it was genuinely an impossible request. And settling deep in some crevice somewhere beneath all the hurt he recognized the feeling of relief. 

He tried his best to figure out what the relief was about, but he kept coming back to the same thing, he was relieved that the relationship was over. He felt wrong for having that thought. It was uncomfortable to have that knowledge and to just sit with it. But he processed through the discomfort and soon concluded that just how Taylor said she didn’t like herself anymore, neither did he. He was afraid to say or do the wrong thing and then be back in a weird limbo thing where she’d leave his place for a few days to clear her head and then come back a few days later with another condition he needed to meet to make things “work”. She was never unreasonable, but he was tired. He felt like he was fighting against who he was and he hated it. His mum always told him that he should be with someone who loves and accepts who he is and that he shouldn’t have to change fundamental parts of himself for the sake of making someone else happy.

He checked the time, it was only 7am and he dreaded being an early riser right now when he needed the rest. He just lay there quietly for a while, he could hear her moving around in the bedroom, she was probably packing up, their flight left that night. He had no idea what her plans were. Eventually, he really needed to use the bathroom and wanted a shower so he sat up and stretched his arms back behind his head and arched his back up, the low crack of his back releasing its tension made him hum before he stood. He knocked at the door gently with his index finger.

“Yeah?”

“I need a wee. And a shower.” He said. Moments later the lock clicked and she opened the door.

“Morning.”

“Good morning.” He murmured.

“You alright?” She asked.

“Yeah, I think so.” He said, “And you?”

“Good too. I don’t…regret it. Or take it back if that’s what you’re asking.” She said and he nodded, “Ummm, well go ahead and get in there.” She said.

“Tay?”

“Yeah?” She asked, eyes meeting his.

“We should talk logistics after. Don’t scamper off, alright?” He asked and she nodded.

“Yeah, ummm, should I order up?”

“Yeah, I’ll have whatever you have.”

“Kay.” She hummed.

When Harry got out their breakfast was being delivered. So he got dressed quickly and then headed out to the little table out in the lounging area of their suite. The spread looked good and he soon sat down and started eating. It was tense and quiet for a bit before he spoke up.

“So ummm…are you going to come back to London with me or take some time away?” He asked.

“Ummm, I think I’m gonna stay here. Just ummm…get a bit of space.”

“Yeah, that’s alright. Ummm, obviously, I can take care of this for you-”

“No, it’s alright. I mean…I broke up with you, if anything I should pay for you and…soothe your broken heart.” She said with a small smile and he chuckled.

“I might not seem like it but I am upset. It just doesn’t feel real yet.” He explained and she offered a tight-lipped smiled.

“It’s alright, I know what you mean.” She mumbled before they ate a bit more. “So ummm, are you gonna go after her? Y/N?”

“Ummm, we had this deal where we’d see where fate led us, so no.” he said and she sighed.

“All that for you not to go after what you really want?”

“It’s not like that. I really wanted things to work with you too, like I love you and I care about you-”

“Sure, but the whole time you’ve loved her. So you should go be with her.” She said, as if it were the obvious next move. He still didn’t think that she was fully understanding what was really going on inside of him.

“I mean, it’s not that simple…” 

“Sure it is, Harry.” She sighed, “You’ve been pining after her all these years. I mean, I know that things didn’t work out how you wanted the first time and that letting go really hurt you. But I think you’ve been running from what you really want for long enough, H. I know you’re scared that you’ll put yourself out there and it won’t work again, but you have to take the risk.”

“I will, just…when the time is right.” He said and she nodded.

After she packed the last of her things she headed off to somewhere he didn’t know and that was that.

****************

You had just finished breakfast and Caitlyn had just hopped in the shower and you were trying to figure out what to wear out. You had two options laid out on the bed when Caitlyn’s phone started ringing from the bedside table and you hurried over and froze as you saw “Harry Styles, mobile” displayed on the glass screen. There was a wacky picture of him making a funny, irritated face in the background. It made you smile for a moment before you wondered why he’d be calling. Maybe something was wrong? You decided to deal with the consequences later and just answer it. 

“Hello?” You greeted tentatively. Your voice faded into a breathless whisper by the second syllable of the word as the uncertainty of your decision grew.

“Y/N?” He asked, almost in disbelief and you nodded and then remembered you weren’t in front of him and inhaled sharply.

“Yeah, it’s me.” You responded and smiled when you heard him sigh in relief and then chuckle.

“Hi!” He greeted cheerfully.

“Hi.” You laughed breathily and then waited for his response.

“Ummm, I was only calling to check on you actually.” He said.

“Oh, that’s sweet of you.”

“Well, I heard through the grapevine that you got a little sick.” He chuckled and you giggled.

“Yeah, that happened…” you said and he hummed, “I’m alright, I just got overwhelmed because I was drinking and also I…did drugs. I don’t think I would’ve had such a theatrical reaction otherwise.” You explained.

“Well either way, I’m glad you’re feeling better.”

“Thank you. And how are you? I was worried that I maybe… caused some…tension between you and Taylor last night.” You said carefully.

“Yeah, I’m…alright.” He said, face twisted up a bit awkwardly.

“Why did you say it weird?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Did I?”

“I know you…” you said knowingly and he smiled to himself.

“I’m just so happy to hear your voice again. I missed the sound.” He expressed and you felt your cheeks getting all warm as you blushed.

“I’ve missed you too. A lot.” You responded. “So, how are you? Really.” You asked again. Harry was great at deflecting. But if something was wrong with them and you had unintentionally caused it, then the least you could do was talk it out with him.

“I swear, I am fine, but ummm…Taylor actually…broke up with me.” He said and you gasped audibly.

“Oh my god…” you sighed regretfully, already feeling awful and guilty for their demise, “I’m so sorry, H. So truly sorry. Are you sure you’re alright?” You asked and he sighed, “Was it because of me?” You asked next, your voice was small and quiet.

“Oh no, get that out of your head. Not at all.” He responded immediately, “It wasn’t you. This was all me…” he said and you sighed, “But I promise I’m good. Well at least right now I am…” he said.

“Well, when you don’t feel good you can call me, you know?” You said and he chuckled.

“Actually I can’t…I haven’t got your number any more.” He confessed and you scoffed.

“Oh…Okay…” you hummed in playful offense.

“I assure you it wasn’t my idea.” He added with a chuckle, “But I mean, deleting it didn’t really do what it was intended to, which was get me to forget about you, so…” He chuckled.

“I mean…” you hummed and giggled.

“Well ummm…I’m glad you’re alright.”

“Thanks. When are you heading home?”

“Tonight. I leave at 10.”

“Oh ummm…if you wanted some company we’re gonna go for a walk in the park?” You offered.

“Really?”

“Yeah, H.”

“Yeah, I’d love to come. Ummm, I’m staying at The Mark, so right near the park.”

“Oh, we’re at the Carlyle! Just down the street from you. We can walk over and meet you in the lobby?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect. Text me when you guys are walking over.”

“Will do.” You smiled.

“Alright, see you later. Bye.”

“Bye.”

When Caitlyn came out of the shower you immediately told her what you’d done and that Harry and Taylor had broken up. She was completely shocked that something as seemingly insignificant as running into you in the bathroom had been the thing that pushed Taylor over the edge.

“Wow…”

“I know. He said it wasn’t my fault but…I mean it all goes to shit after I had a wee run in with Taylor in the bathroom?”

“Yeah…I just can’t believe that is what broke the camel’s back. Like, it must’ve been quite bad between them if that’s all it took, you know?”

“Yeah…like I feel like it’s kind of my fault, but I also know I didn’t do anything, you know? But God, just seeing the joy drain from her face when she realized it was me…that sucked.”

“I can imagine. But hey, now you’re both single, maybe you guys can try again now.”

“Maybe…but he really loved her so I think he will need some time to get past this.”

“Just don’t wait too long. With both of you griping at me I don’t know what to do anymore.” She chuckled and you smiled.

“Yeah…”

***************

You and Caitlyn were waiting in the lobby at The Mark and after a few minutes Harry was wandering down looking cozy in a hoodie and some workout shorts. He smiled and waved when he saw you guys. You and Caitlyn waved back as he came closer.

“Hiya.” He said lowly as he hugged Caitlyn.

“Hey.” She hummed and then they pulled back.

“Hi.” He said more timidly as he stepped over to you and hugged you into his body. You relaxed in his hold and sighed in relief.

“Hi. It’s so good to see you.” You smiled as you pulled back.

“You too.” He grinned, “Umm, shall we?”

“Yeah, let’s go.” Caitlyn agreed.

You were all chatting, recounting your adventures from the MET as you made your walk through the park. Then, Caitlyn would take you guys to a coffee shop she really liked. It was relaxed, though as you got deeper through the park a couple of people did notice you guys and two girls started following you guys for a bit until you were veering too far from their path. You were all linked arms and skipping as you playfully sung the “We’re Off to See the Wizard” song from “The Wizard of Oz” through your laughter.

“Okay friends, ready for a little caffeine boost?” Caitlyn asked.

“Definitely.” Harry chuckled and then you guys started heading back. 

While waiting in line at the coffee shop and chatting with Caitlyn about what you guys should try, you and Harry had to respectfully decline getting pictures and videos with fans to avoid making a huge fuss. But nevertheless, it was obvious that people were recording from afar or taking pictures without your consent. He didn’t seem as nervous or fearful about it as he did when you two dated, so at least there was that. He felt far more confident and comfortable declining these requests now. Before he felt a little bit obligated, as did you, because if it weren’t for these people’s support you wouldn’t be where you were. 

You did a lot of work on boundaries in therapy and now you thought of it as being on and off the clock. If you were at an event or on a stage or out in public repping a certain brand or product even if you were with friends then you were “on the clock”. But if you were just hanging out with your friends, running errands, going about your day…then you considered yourself to be “off the clock” and during these moments, depending on where you were or who you were with, you might accept or decline the requests fans made of you. Now, after what Harry had been dealing with since the night (or early morning technically) you didn’t really want anyone getting too close and you could see the gratitude in his eyes when you turned away yet another fan who was gazing between the two of you and deciding that you might be the easiest target. 

“You’ve gotten really good at this.” Harry hummed lowly as he leaned closer to you and you giggled as his lips slightly tickled your ear.

“Thanks. Therapy.” You said as you glanced up at him and he hummed.

“Not cause of me, right?” He asked quietly.

“Not primarily, but you came up.” You confirmed and he smiled.

“I talked about you too. A lot.” He chuckled and you smiled.

“All good things I hope…”

“Oh yeah…definitely.” He said sarcastically and you laughed and you moved to elbow him playfully but he caught your arm first and just pulled your body in front of his. “Had to overpower you to prevent any violence.” He said quietly and you laughed and tossed your head back to rest on his shoulder and he glanced down at you.

“You have boogies.” You grinned as you informed him quietly and he furrowed his eyebrows and scoffed.

“No I don’t.” He sniffled and ran his finger under his nose just in case and you laughed and turned around to face him again now that his dominant hand was occupied. “Do I really?” He asked you quietly and you sniggered and shook your head.

“No, just messing with you.” You assured him as you laughed and he rolled his eyes before suddenly grabbing your arms and pulling you in and then pulling your arms around his torso.

“Hug me.” He requested softly and you swore the entire world stopped just then and you smiled as you leaned into him and hugged him tight before he squeezed around your waist and exhaled. You gently scratched over the expanse of his back for a few moments, “Now when I google us this’ll come up.” He said softly.

“Hmmm, very clever.” You smiled, “Love it.” You decided and he chuckled.

“Okay, stop flirting and decide on your drinks, we’re next in line.” Caitlyn said.

“Ready?” You asked softly.

“No.” Harry mumbled, “But do it. Just do it.” You sighed and let go of him and you looked up at him with a gentle smile as you rubbed over his shoulder.

“Oh, I missed you.” You said and he grinned and you turned around as you heard Caitlyn start ordering her drink.

“Please don’t check ‘em out, I’ve got them covered.” Harry called to the cashier who nodded and smiled at him. Soon after you were all corned up near the pick up counter chatting, including Caitlyn in it a lot more now that you and Harry had been able to just relish in each other’s company for a little bit.

“Order for Harry!” The barista called and Harry walked up and grabbed the drinks, smiling at the barista and mumbling a thanks before going the few steps over to you guys and handing over your drinks. 

Caitlyn had gotten a matcha latte while you and Harry opted for plain cold brews. Once again, you guys took off but this time back to your hotels with your drinks in hand to beat the warmth of the day. You guys were talking about your favorite looks of the night as you made the walk back and when you were down the street he turned to you guys.

“Ummm, would you guys want to come up for a bit? I don’t have to leave until 8 from here?” He asked, “We could have dinner?” He asked you two and Caitlyn shrugged.

“Yeah, I’m down.” She smiled and you turned to Harry and nodded in agreement. 

After being seen leaving earlier, there were people waiting around for him outside the hotel but you guys rushed in quickly and then headed up to his suite. You headed off to the bathroom while Caitlyn and Harry picked something to watch. You looked yourself over in the mirror and you were glad that you looked alright, you felt a little weird from your slight hangover still, bit you were glad you didn’t look dead. When you opened up the door Caitlyn was sitting on the bed waiting for you to get out so she could go in.

“S’all yours.” You smiled as you stepped out.

“Behave.” She admonished and you giggled and headed back out to the little “living room” area to see Harry still scrolling through the channels on the TV with a little furrow in his brow and a slight squint to his eyes and you smiled.

“Where are you glasses?”

“I lost ‘em a bit ago.” He said glancing over to you before you plopped down beside him.

“Oh H…”

“I know. Haven’t been able to secure an appointment.” He said and you hummed. 

“You feeling OK though?” You asked more seriously and he nodded.

“Yeah…like it sucks, but you guys are good company. I’m sure I’ll feel it when I’m on my own though.”

“Well I think that’s great, H.” You said and he looked at you a bit perplexed, “I mean that you have to feel this out. I know that you really love her and that this can’t be easy for you, so you have to sit with it a bit and just go through the motions of it all.” You explained.

“And what about us? Didn’t we agree that-”

“Technically you said a few years from now…” you said with a soft smile.

“Well I’ll be 30-something by then…”

“So will I…” you shrugged and he smiled a bit sadly.

“Have you…changed your mind?” He asked you cautiously. He was trying not to look broken up about it, but you knew him well and you could see the fear and concern in his eyes.

“I’m not saying that. I’m saying you need to be single for a little bit. More than two months.” You said and he chuckled, “Seriously Harry, when we ended you had a new girlfriend a few months later. And then when that ended you were suddenly with Taylor, no?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Yeah, I did kinda rush into this last few more than usual…it just felt really right at the time and we vibed well. I knew I’d be off for a bit so it felt like good time to try.” He explained with a shrug. “Taylor actually started talking to me before I was single, so we were friends for a bit so it’s not like I just dated someone I hardly knew.” He defended and you giggled along with him.

“Yeah, I joke a bit. But I mean, as long as you don’t regret the time you’ve spent and as long as you’ve learned and grown from these people and your relationships with them I think that’s great. But I think we both know that filling the void is simply a bandaid.” You explained.

“I know…” he sighed, “I really am just so scared of being alone.”

“Well H, you’re never going to be alone. I’m here whenever you need anything.” You assured and he glanced to you with a smile, “I know that maybe it was just…scary to talk and be around each other before, but I mean once we did see each other it didn’t…hurt. Not at all. It actually brought me…relief that…nothing had really changed between us.” You said to him and he hummed and nodded.

“Yeah.” He smiled, “You know I was genuinely dreading the day I’d run into you. I think I also thought it would be painful or feel like defeat or failure… it did fuck me up a bit but in a good way.” He assured and you chuckled.

“Yeah, same…” you smiled, “Well, all that to say that I love you, a lot! And I’ll always be here for you no matter what happens with us. I don’t want us to be estranged ever again. Got it?”

“Yeah.” He nodded with a relieved smile, “You know, I think you’re right though…”

“Of course I am.” You said, “About what?” He chuckled.

“That I need to just take a little bit of time to really just get through this and then we can think of everything else.”

“Right.” You smiled. 

You guys fell silent for a bit and then you heard that Caitlyn was actually on the phone in the bedroom. When you glanced back there the door was nearly closed all the way and you sighed as you glanced down at your hands.

“How about you? How’ve you been?” He asked.

“Good.” You nodded, “I mean, Seb was relentless for a bit, but a few weeks ago he just stopped trying to win me back. I mean, I don’t think what he wants is awful, but I don’t see myself changing that much of myself just to fit the kind of person he wants.”

“Yeah.” Harry nodded in understanding. “Like I don’t think that’s a bad thing either, but it’s just the way he expects it to rest on you that’s a little…antiquated.” He chuckled and you nodded.

“Right, like don’t tell it to me like it’s my job because I’m a female. That’s where it really upset me. Like if you have a life together and you share a home and have a family it’s both of yours to look after!”

“I agree.” He chuckled, “You know, I still don’t know how to change a tire.” He chuckled and you smiled.

“I don’t think you’ll ever need to know anyway.” You teased and he sniggered. He repositioned himself so that he was facing you now and you glanced over at him. “What?” You questioned and he smiled.

“I’m really happy that you’re here.” He said softly.

“Me too.” You assured and then he pulled you into his arms and hugged you tight. He sighed in relief as he rested his cheek over the top of your head. As you exhaled your body melted into his even more until he just left himself fall back against the arm of the couch.

“You know, when we were together, I genuinely thought you were the best person I’d ever met. And like even now, it’s like you’re still the same person but just elevated, if that makes sense?” He asked and you hummed, “I want to experience you as you are now. I really love what I’ve seen. Your self control, your patience, and your self awareness, I really enjoy seeing you this way. I think when we were younger you kind of…looked to me a lot to gauge how you should feel about things…like not that you were just agreeing with me, but that my views and perception of things mattered a lot and influenced yours a lot.” He explained and you hummed.

“Yeah, that’s very true. I think you just had so much more experience in the world and I agreed with mostly everything you cared about and so I definitely tried to learn things from you and let those things influence me a lot.” 

“Well not anymore…” he smiled, “I mean, I think values-wise we’ll always be on the same page, but now you’ve grown into it on your own. Like, you took all this time to just look after yourself and understand yourself and I’m just so proud of who you’ve become. And I want to…get to that point. I want to get to a point where you are proud of me.” He said.

“Oh, I am!” You said as you set up and turned to face him again, “I think you’ve come such a long way, H. And I think you know who you are now and it’s so refreshing to see it. I think you’ve overcome your need to people please and also your fear of what people think of you and what you do. Before, the way you were perceived was almost the most important thing to you.”

“Yeah.” He agreed.

“Like over the last couple years, seeing you out and about with your friends, your partners, or whatever it be, I mean, I love it! You’ve started choosing the things and people that make you happy regardless of what other people think and I love that for you so, so much. I’ve just always wanted for you to feel happy with yourself.” You said as you reached for and then squeezed his hand in yours. He glanced down at it and smiled.

“I do, I really do.” He assured you. “You know, I just can’t help but get excited when I think about how things will be with us when we try again. It’s going to be so good…we’ve both grown up so much and really taken care of ourselves. I think I might have a bit of catching up to do with you…” he chuckled, “But I’m going to work hard at it for myself and for us too.” He said and you smiled.

“Well just know that I’ve loved every version of you so far because you’ve always been good to me. But it’s really important to me that you feel happy with yourself and clearly that’s something you’re getting more and more in tune with and it’s very beautiful to witness.” You said.

“Ummm, thank you.” He said with a timid smile as you ran your thumb over his knuckles.

“Yeah, of course.” You replied. And before anything more could happen Caitlyn came out of the bedroom and let out an exasperated sigh. “Is everything alright?” You asked her as you both watched her come around.

“A writing session got moved up for a show I’m working on and I’ll need to be back in LA tomorrow afternoon.” She groaned as she plopped down on the couch. “I found a flight, a red eye though.” She said and you hummed.

“Well I’ll go back too, don’t want to be here by myself.” You said and she nodded.

“OK, let me get them then.”

“OK, I’ll Zelle you right now, just let me know how much they are.” You said and she nodded.

“We need to pack.”

“Yeah…” you sighed.

“You guys can go if you want. Please don’t feel obligated to hang around here.” Harry said.

“What if we help you finish your packing and then you can come with us and we can pack while we have dinner and then you go from there?” Caitlyn suggested.

“Ummm yeah, I’d love that actually.” He said.

“Settled then.” You smiled at him and he returned a brighter smile, “Let’s do it!” You said and he guided you guys to the bedroom and got his things together. 

He only had a carry on as he was only there for a few days so this didn’t take too long. You guys ordered an Uber while Harry checked out and then you all headed back to your hotel. Caitlyn did her own packing as she didn’t want Harry seeing her intimates and such, so he stuck to helping you. Not that he had seen any of your new stuff, but at least he’d been in that position before. Since you guys were going to be there for a week total you guys unpacked your things into the dressers and closet, so currently all your things were laid out on the floor while Caitlyn’s were on the large bed you had shared over the last several days.

“So you guys shared?” Harry asked as he folded up some of your jeans.

“Yep. Though I don’t think we will ever again-”

“Oh my god…I shoved you one night.” Caitlyn said as you started to laugh and Harry did too.

“One night’s enough trauma.” You said and she scoffed.

“Do you kick?” Harry asked.

“No, I think I maybe had a very vivid dream because I’m usually a very still.” She explained, “Though you are a cuddler. Maybe I was trying to get away from you.” She said to you and you giggled.

“Maybe…it’s just when I sleep in unfamiliar spaces.” You explained and Harry smiled at you.

“Still? With how much you’re on the road for tours and shit?” He asked and you shrugged, “S’cute.” He assured you softly as he continued folding one of your tops.

“It’s not.” Caitlyn said to you with a grin and you just stuck your tongue out at her and she chuckled.

After a bit you guys ordered in some grilled cheese sandwiches because it’s just a lovely comfort food. With Harry there and some stimulating conversation you guys finished packing quite fast, but now you had to go down to reception and sort out the early check out. Harry offered to go with you but you assured him it was fine, you didn’t want him to get flocked in the lobby and then you hurried out promising to be back soon.

“So…what’s up with you two?” Caitlyn asked Harry when you left.

“She wants me to stay single for a while and properly move past this. I mean, she’s right of course, but it’s just something I struggle with.” He admitted, “But she said I can count on her if I need anything.” He said of you.

“Yeah, of course. And me too! You have so many friends out in LA who would more than gladly lend an ear since we don’t see you as much anymore.” She explained and he smiled.

“Well thank you. I will definitely take advantage of that. And like…I do want to work on myself a bit more…maybe I can head out there for a bit and get some face time with my therapist. We talk on the phone or do virtual stuff sometimes, but I think I could use some in person intensive work. We haven’t spoken in maybe…close to a year.” He explained with a chuckle.

“Well yeah, if it’ll be beneficial to you, do it.” She encouraged him.

“Ummm, I hate to do this to you but ummm…I saw Y/N texting someone quite a bit while we were down here…is she seeing someone?” He asked, “Or maybe I should just ask her…yeah, I’ll just ask her.” He said instead and Caitlyn chuckled.

“Alright.” She smiled. Shortly after you came back into the room and told Caitlyn everything was good to go for your earlier departure. “Excellent.” She said to you, “Well, now that we’re all packed I’m going to smoke my joint on the balcony, I want this to be the greatest grilled cheese I’ve eaten in a long time.” She said as she stood from the bed and stretched. “Do you guys want some?” She asked glancing to them and then giving Harry a knowing glance.

“No, I’m alright.” Harry said.

“Same.” You assured her and she smiled and then made her way out of the bedroom and into the common area of your shared suite and after a few moments you guys heard the door shut behind her. 

“You still don’t smoke?”

“I’ve tried, I just can’t. It burns so bad.” You grimaced and he chuckled.

“S’not good for us anyway…” he said and you nodded, “Ummm…can I ask you something?” 

“Yeah, of course.” You nodded and waited for him to speak up expectantly.

“That umm…the guy you keep texting? Are you- is he-”

“Oh no. No, no, no.” you said to him right away, “Well…we are…ummm, hooking up, but he’s just a friend.” You explained and he nodded.

“Oh okay. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t like…coming on so strong just for you to be…taken again.”

“I’m not the one who moves lightening fast here…” you teased and he chuckled and bit down on his lip to suppress the laughter he wanted to let out, “Come on…you know it was funny.” You pressed as you giggled.

“Yeah, real fucking funny.” He grinned and you chuckled as you stood up from the floor, “Where are you going?”

“Nowhere, just up here. I wanna pick a really funny movie because I really like it when she gets all giggly.” You explained to Harry and he laughed as he also pushed himself up off the ground and joined you on the large king bed. You glanced down at the remote with about a bajillion buttons and scoffed as you tried to find the one that would bring up the list of the scheduled programming.

“Need some help?”

“I can do it.” You assured as you pressed yet another wrong button, “Doesn’t it usually say guide?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Yeah? Does it not?”

“No…” you hummed, “Here.” You said handing it over and he scanned over his options before just trying “menu” and hoping that would take him somewhere useful but nothing happened, “I think we’re on the menu page.” You said to him and he furrowed his eyebrows.

“Should we call the front desk?”

“Oh no, that’s humiliating. I think we can just press every button until we find it.” You sniggered and he handed it back over.

“You do it then.” 

“Gladly.” You hummed and started going button by button, after a few tries you gasped and you got it. “Oh! Hooray!” You exclaimed and he just watched you light up at such a tiny thing and it made his heart flutter at just how cute you were. That’s one thing he missed so much about you. You made such a big fuss over things, truly anything was an excuse to celebrate and be joyful. He missed being around that, there truly wasn’t a victory too small for you. Harry studied your face as you looked through the channels listed on the screen. “You’re staring.” You smiled without peeling your eyes from the screen.

“I know.” He responded and you glanced over to him to find him just admiring you. “You’re just so breathtaking.” he said softly. It made your heart flutter and for your tummy to feel all tingly as his gaze raked down your face and then landed on your lips. You had to look away because you swore your throat was closing up from how nervous you were. But when his hand landed under your jaw and angled you back up to look into his eyes you swallowed thickly.

“Har…” you whispered and squeezed your eyes shut.

“No, baby. Look at me. Please.” He insisted and you blinked your eyes open to look at him again with a racing pulse as he inched closer to you. Your noses touched and you lingered near each other nervously, eyes flickering between each others as your lips skimmed together as your breaths started getting heavier. Both of you were hoping one of you would be brave enough to bite the bullet or to just break it off. But preferably to follow through with the kiss.

“Fuck it.” You whispered before surging up to properly connect your lips. The first kiss was just a quick one, a tester almost since you both just looked at each other for a moment.

“One more.” He mumbled and you nodded before he leaned back in and held your neck gently as he kissed you deeper this time. But that kiss inevitably became a string of smiley pecks as you two tried to pull away. “Just one more then.” He smiled and you laughed a bit as he kissed over your top lip and then your bottom lip before he pulled back and your eyes met again. They were both sparkling with need and before you knew it your arms were around his neck and he was settling himself over you as your head sank into the fluffy pillow beneath you . Harry’s warm smooth lips moved in a perfectly synchronized and familiar dance with your own as you kissed ardently.

You moaned as he rolled you onto your sides and his arm draped over your hip and then slid under your shirt. His fingers tickled up your bare back before his hand flattened right beneath the band of your bra and pushed you closer to him. His thigh was trapped between your legs, allowing just a bit of friction for you. Your tongues slid together before he sucked on your bottom lip and then went back in to kiss you properly. Just as things were about to get a bit more heated you heard some heavy knocks on the door along with the room service call. 

“Mmm…need to get the food.” You mumbled against his mouth.

“In a second.” He hummed before licking into you again and you shuddered and moaned into his mouth at his intensity and fell back into the languid kiss. You were buzzing with excitement as he started to peck your lips a few times before slowly retreating until finally, you were both just panting heavily as you regained your breaths. “Okay, go.” He hummed softly with a smile.

“One more.” You whispered to him and he grinned and grabbed your face before pecking over your lips several times until you were both giggling through it, no amount of kisses were enough for either of you.

“Just leave or I won’t be able to stop.” He mumbled and you laughed, tossing your head back which caused him to kiss your chin. When you straightened up again he ran his thumb down your smile line, “Mmmm, I’ve missed your laugh. And your lips, and how you taste, and how you kiss me…” he muttered between gentle smooches. “It’s just not like this with anyone else.” He mumbled and you pressed your forehead against his.

“It’s really not.” You agreed, “Okay, let me get the food. And Caitlyn.” You said and he nodded before kissing the tip of your nose and letting you go. You rolled out of the bed and then hurried to get the door to wheel in your tray of food and then you went to grab Caitlyn who was already quite stoned. “Come to bed, we’re gonna watch a movie or something.”

“Kay.” She mumbled and followed you into the bedroom as you pushed the little cart in.

Harry rolled out of the bed and grabbed his sandwich before hopping back on and then you grabbed yours and got on the bed next. Caitlyn stayed standing as she picked at the fries on her plate.

“Get on.” You giggled and she sniggered.

“Oh right, right…” she hummed and got in behind you. “What’re we watching?” She asked as she leaned against the headboard.

“Oh, we’re watching Derry Girls. This thing has Netflix.” Harry said as he searched it up.

“How convenient that you know how it works now.” You said to him as he pointed the remote at the TV.

“Oh no, I just pressed something by mistake as I adjusted myself a bit.” He chuckled, “Well m-my position! I adjusted my position.” He clarified quickly for Caitlyn’s sake.

“Oh please, I only left to give you guys a moment. The sexual tension is suffocating.” Caitlyn said before biting into her sandwich and then moaning in delight at the perfectly crisp bread and then the gooey, warm cheese. “What you two have is what I have with this sandwich right now…fuck, that’s perfect…” she sighed happily. And you just giggled as you glanced to Harry and shrugged and he smiled and then you all started eating as the show started up.

The time for Harry to go came very swiftly and before you knew it, you and Caitlyn were getting in the elevator to walk him out to meet his driver. You all chatted a bit during the ride down and finally you were heading out to the lobby.

“Ummm Cait can you be a look out for a minute?” Harry asked her and she smiled and nodded as she reached for his suitcase and Harry grabbed your hand and pulled you into the stairwell. “I just wanted to hold you for a little bit.” He said and you smiled and hugged him tight and he sighed and squeezed you.

“You’re gonna be a alright, H.” You assured him, “And if at any point you’re not, I’m here for you. Always.” You assured him and you felt him nod in understanding. “I love you. So, so much.” You reminded him.

“I love you too.” He whispered back. After a few more moments you pulled back and tiptoed before you grabbed his face gently in your hands and smiled as you pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“One for the road.” You hummed and he smiled.

“Thank you.”

“Of course.” You assured him and then you grabbed his hand and led him back out by the elevators.

“That was quick.” Caitlyn smirked and you both rolled your eyes at her as she giggled.

“You’re a menace.” Harry said as he grabbed his bag from her hands.

“I know.” She giggled.

“Come on. Can’t keep the driver waiting.” You said and then you guys headed out. 

The night was still warm and Harry greeted his driver before getting his bag in the car. There were a few people lingering outside who were now watching the three of you considering Harry was a hard person to miss, his energy alone commanded people’s attention. 

“Well thank you both for including me today. I had a lot of fun and I missed being with you guys.” He smiled.

“I’m glad you had a good time.”, “Of course, H.” You and Caitlyn ensured.

“A group hug is in order, I think.” He said and you both smiled and huddled around him.

“Don’t be a stranger.” Caitlyn hummed as you guys pulled apart.

“I won’t.” He assured with a smile before hugging her and then he hugged you. He held you a bit longer than Caitlyn before he released you.

“Let me know when you land and make it home safe. Okay?” You smiled up at him as you rubbed his arm sweetly and he nodded before hopping in the car. You guys waved him off and then headed back up to your suite.

“You know you’re gonna go way more viral now…” Caitlyn said and you sighed.

“No, I think people will say he cheated on Taylor with me and wreak havoc on me.” You said, realistically. 

“Well, he kinda did…” Caitlyn said through a chuckle.

“Oh, shut it.” You quipped and she laughed. “Fuck…he did though.”

“It was a kiss.” 

“A kiss she doesn’t know about.” Caitlyn reminded and you nibbled on your bottom lip as you rode back up to your floor.

“Maybe asking him to join us was a mistake? I mean…he looked far too happy for just being broken up with.”

“Friend, he hadn’t been happyfor a while now and it was all to do with the path his relationship was going down. Not you.” She said emphatically, “You both kept your end of the bargain by keeping your distance and seeing what would happen in the future. It was just hard for Taylor to live with the information that he still loves you. Do you think he’s polyamorous?” She asked you.

“I don’t know…maybe?” You shrugged.

“I mean, at least when we spoke about his predicament that’s what it sounded like to me. That he loved you but that he also loved Taylor and he wanted to try and keep his feelings for you “on pause” somehow to work on his relationship with her.” She explained and you hummed. “But I think to her it was hard to come to terms that he was in love with you while simultaneously being in love with her. And I told him that it just doesn’t work for some people, they don’t see how love can be expansive like that in a committed relationship. My first ever girlfriend in college, Jen, was poly. And I thought I was okay with it, she said she could be monogamous, just her feelings continued to exist for others. She had this friend though that she loved too, it was just so obvious how they felt for each other and it sucked. It started to affect how I felt in that relationship. She never crossed a line and neither did he, but I just felt really insecure in it. I understand it so much better now, I mean I was only 19 when I dated her. But I fully understand why for Taylor it was just not possible to move forward with Harry if this is her first time in a situation like this.” She explained and you nodded. “And I mean, I think that you also need to figure out if that’s something you can live with if he is.” She said.

“Right…”

“Like I get that you guys are like each other’s person, but that doesn’t mean he can’t meet and love someone else along the way, you know?”

“Yeah, that’s true…I mean, just seeing how he was trying to accommodate things to support Taylor’s needs gives me a sense of peace. But I mean, we should definitely have a conversation about what this might look like for him in the future whenever we get back to a stage where we’ll have a relationship.”

“I agree.” Caitlyn said.

Overall, you felt good about where you were now to be back in touch with Harry if he needed you at any point. You were also extremely proud of yourself for the way you handled the situation about your future together. Of course, you would run into his arms at a moment’s notice, but he was sad and he needed to grieve the wonderful person he had lost. He did love Taylor, at least enough to put all of his effort into making up for breaking her trust. It had just happened and you really wanted to give him time to sit with the situation and work through the hard feelings you knew would come soon.

As soon as you guys landed early the next morning you, Harry, and Caitlyn were plastered all over social media per a call from your manager. She sent you a link and you looked and sure enough there were photos and videos of you three talking and skipping through central park, looking like you were having the best day of your lives. You showed Caitlyn who just mumbled a low “it is what it is” and you bit your lip.

JENNY L:

And there’s also this one…

You saw her next text and then clicked on the linked article and when it loaded you couldn’t help but snort out a laugh as you read the obscenely cheesy title of the gossip article: “STYLES CHOOSES TO SKIP OUT ON TAYLOR!” It was staring at you in big, bold red font. But your stomach twisted a bit in anxiety as you scrolled down the article recounting what witnesses had said to the tabloid. There were quotes in the same bold font saying how you guys seemed really “happy”, “cozy”, and “familiar with each other.” And of course there was a short clip of him whispering into your ear while you hugged and gently scratched at his back at the coffee shop. Also of you glancing up at him and the both of you smiling when you joked with him about having visible boogies… you smiled at the memory but you knew that what would surely come next when the both of you gave no real explanation to this. Towards the bottom of it there was one more photo, one of the only ones ever taken of you two a couple years into your relationship. You guys had been walking back to his house in London after having some lunch. It explained how it seemed that you guys had been familiar at some point and maybe you’d lost touch but were back in touch after the MET.

JENNY L:

I already have a few reporters reaching out for commentary. Please tell me you guys didn’t do something bad…

Y/N:

No, don’t worry about this. Taylor actually broke up with him after a MET after party. There was an incident, I’ll call and explain when I get home. We’re in the car service right now on our way back from LAX.

JENNY L:

For sure. 

Y/N:

I’ll also call Harry and see what his team is going to do.

JENNY L:

For now don’t. I’ll get in touch with Jeffrey and Tommy. I know they’ll want to isolate him from this as much as possible. I’ll be standing by for your phone call.

Y/N:

Sounds good. Talk soon!

Jenny “hearted” your message and you guys drove off to your place in silence. Caitlyn had left her car at your place and since Sebastian and you had broken up she decided to keep some things at your place for impromptu sleep overs. So as soon as you got in she went to get some more sleep in the guest bedroom while you called Jenny and explained what had happened the night before. It hadn’t been anything bad, but you then explained what Caitlyn had shared about how Harry and Taylor were struggling with getting back on track after he admitted he had feelings for you.

“…so yeah, there wasn’t anything fishy per se apart from that. We actually hadn’t even spoken since we saw each other last year. Taylor never attempted to contact me or anything either, we don’t even know each other. Just that little run-in in the bathroom which no one saw.” You shared with Jenny, “So uh, no connections there either.”

“Okay, sounds good. Already the fans are labeling you a home wrecker, they really liked them together.”

“Yeah, I was expecting that.” You sighed.

“Oh, Jeffrey just texted me!” Jenny said and opened it up, “Okay he said that Harry wants to clarify that you have been close friends since you were 19 years old but that he’s not all that sure that they should do that because you guys having a history could mean more of a logical framework for any theories of cheating.”

“Yeah, like we were so close that it eventually led to that…” you said, “I mean we could just both go no comment. I know we didn’t do anything wrong so… ”

“Yeah, I agree. I guess Harry doesn’t want to “hide you from his life” is what Jeff just said.” She shared and you bit your lip.

“I think I need to talk to Harry ,this is something he feels like he might owe me for. When we dated, I mean, you know…we were both so worried about the public ruining it for us. He did tell me that he felt bad that he let his fear of what others might think get in the way of us living our lives. And that it sometimes felt like we never happened because everything was so hidden. He said he wished that everyone could’ve seen how happy we make each other. He could be wanting to make up for that…”

“Mmmm, okay. Let me tell Jeffrey to get him on the line, we can do a group call or FaceTime?”

“Yeah, that’s alright.” You assured her.

“Okay I’ll call you back.”

“Yeah.” 

A few minutes later a call was coming in with the three of them and Jenny, and you guys started to discuss. Tommy said that he had tried to get in touch with Taylor’s team but she didn’t want to weigh in on anything as she was still dealing with the decision to break up with him. Harry understood that, so they weren’t going to get a confirmation from her any time soon that she had ended the relationship.

“H, I completely understand why you want to release that statement but I think it’ll only perpetuate the idea that we were doing things behind her back.”

“I just don’t want to hide that you make me happy anymore.” He sighed.

��We’re not, I mean the pictures are everywhere.” You said with a small smile, “People can see it but we don’t owe them any explanations about it. I don’t think we should address speculations.”

“Yeah, yeah you’re right.” He finally agreed and everyone looked relieved.

“I think if we gradually increase your time together it might make it look more natural?” Tommy suggested.

“What about private photos? What if we have an “iCloud leak”-”

“Absolutely not.” Harry cut Jenny off.

“Well Harry, that might establish what you want without having to say anything.” Jeffrey explained.

“We could choose what we release. Just things from birthdays or shows, parties…” you suggested, “We could show them this is nothing new, that we were always like this.” You smiled.

“Okay, fine…I mean, even Caitlyn has some stuff on her instagram from years ago…I was…looking.” He said and you smiled. “Oh shut it…” he chuckled as you all laughed.

“She’s on private though…always has been.” You reminded and he hummed.

“What if she’s the one that gets “hacked”. People are starting to look into who she is as well. I already saw one article that identified that she’s a screenwriter, I’m sure more people will be trying to see how she’s linked.” Jeffrey chimed in.

“I’ll have to ask her…I don’t want her to give up her privacy for us.” You said and Harry agreed.

“Well I think that would be the best case if she gives us access to her instagram and iCloud. But if not, then we just do the iCloud leak from one of your accounts.” Jeffrey decided. “Start looking through your pictures guys.”

You guys agreed on this strategy and you agreed you’d ask Caitlyn when she woke up. Of course, your best friend listened with an open mind and wasn’t even reluctant to agree and help you guys out. She knew that you guys had messed up when you saw each other that first time, but your commitment to let each other try and live your own lives really showed her that you guys regretted betraying your partners, so of course she wanted to help you both now. When she checked her instagram there were already tons of DM’s and follow requests waiting for her. She wasn’t even verified, she really just used this for personal things, so it would be understandable if she got hacked now that she was connected to you and Harry. Over the next few days your teams figured out the logistics of this plan and Caitlyn shared with you and Harry any pictures that she had of you guys on her iCloud and then a few weeks later the “leak” happened. 

Screenshots of Caitlyn's grid were taken and leaked on twitter from years back and it worked. People were immediately finding what you guys wanted them to find. Then two days later the “iCloud leak” happened. With this stunt, a solid timeline of your and Caitlyn’s friendship with Harry was established. There weren’t too many photos but the ones that fans were circulating the most were the ones of you two with Harry while he was still in the band. Of you guys at Caitlyn’s 25th birthday party with you and Harry kissing her cheek on either side. There was a video of you and Harry doing karaoke, a couple of pictures and a video of Caitlyn and Harry at your first big, sold out show in London. And finally one of him painting your nails with a prototype of what fans soon discovered was now the Pleasing polish “inky pearl”. It had to appear as though “the hacker” had intentionally dug through years of things to find this specific content. And once those were out into the world the tune changed and people thought it was cute that you guys had been friends for that long. People were saying that you guys appeared to be really into each other even back then and that you would make a cute couple.

Naturally, that started shifting the narrative into “maybe Harry dumped Taylor and was just out with his old friends to cheer up a bit”, which was mostly right. But once that became the main rumor an anonymous source leaked to a few gossip news outlets that Taylor had actually been the one to dump Harry the night of the MET. Obviously, Harry and Tommy had been in on that with her representatives because they didn’t want her looking like the chump when she had been the one that did the dumping. And once that came out the internet went wild and people were overwhelmed with the knowledge that his old friends truly were comforting him after a break up and that Taylor had dumped Harry because they were “growing apart”. 

You were fine, but having that all out there in print is what really seemed to make it real for Harry and he started to disappear a bit. You knew he needed space and time to process and heal, so you gave it. You didn’t want to bug him or make him feel pressured, so you assured him that he didn’t have to talk to you if he wasn’t in the mood. But if he didn’t mind, you’d just check in every few days, say hi, send some encouragements and he agreed to that. It was all very one sided as the months inched by and boy, did you miss him, but he really needed to get through this on his own terms.

…. August 2024 ….

Harry’s POV:

When Taylor returned to London in early June to pick up her things from his place it was extremely bittersweet for him to see how she looked so much lighter in terms of her mood and persona as a whole. She didn’t look tired or stressed how she had towards the end of their relationship. She looked more like herself and even sounded like herself, all bubbly and optimistic about things. It made him feel really happy for her, but it also made him sad, knowing that he contributed to her unhappiness. Knowing that he had hurt her enough to dull the gorgeous and bright person that she had been before. The person that he had fallen in love with. He even tried to kiss her when she was leaving and nearly died of embarrassment when she rejected him, but he understood.

He and Tommy did share the PR plan you guys made and assured her that you were cautious in trying to keep her out of it as much as possible. But he heard from her again when the public brought her into the picture and she wanted to set the record straight and he agreed that she should, he didn’t mind it. But once all of it felt resolved he just crashed. 

He stopped talking to you around the second week of June because he just didn’t have the energy. But you had been kind and checked in, assuring him he didn’t need to answer, but you just wanted to encourage him a bit. It meant the world to him that you understood to keep doing that, but still giving him the space he needed to get through this. For months now he had allowed himself to feel it, like you told him he needed to do. And god, it hurt…it hurt so much, but it was relieving to have felt it all. The sadness had faded seemingly very suddenly, he just woke up one day and didn’t feel hopeless. He missed you though, he wanted to see you so badly but he had no idea when too soon was “too soon”. 

Y/N:

This popped up on my pinterest feed! IT’S YOU! Lololol. I laughed so hard and it’s so, so cute. I hope today is better 💛

Harry’s head knocked back as he laughed at the little image on his screen. It really was him and the fact that even the text said “Feel it all” was extremely fateful. He smiled and “hearted” the message before setting his phone down on the counter and turned to go make himself some coffee. Seconds later he came back and unlocked his phone and texted his assistant to book him a one-way ticket to LA for next week.

****************

Y/N POV:

Your summer had been very nice so far. You genuinely were not worried about Harry in the slightest, you knew that healing took time and he knew well that you’d be waiting whenever he was ready. After seeing the way things worked out after the MET, you had a restored sense of hope in fate and the universe, so you let it be. For the time being you were having a lot of fun in the studio working on some new things. You were also spending a lot of time with friends and with Ricky too. You guys were just enjoying what you had going on. It wasn’t a routine at all, your hookups were sporadic and spontaneous, like now…

“Oh fuck yes, right there!” You mewled as his long fingers prodded into your g-spot as his thumb glided over your clit over and over at the perfect pace.

“Shhh…” he chuckled as he looked around briefly. You were in a hidden little nook at the studio. Everyone had gone for lunch but someone could always come in at any moment. “Look so fucking pretty today. You wore it for me, didn’t you?” He mumbled against your lips and you smiled.

“F'ourse.” You panted and then inhaled sharply as your walls fluttered around his fingers as your orgasm neared. It always took longer for you to come standing, so you’d been there a while. “I’m getting close…fuck, faster!” You implored and he listened and started pumping his fingers faster until your legs were trembling. Your head knocked back against the wall and you huffed out a laugh at the thud, but it wasn’t enough to deter you from coming.

“Come for me, Y/N.”

“Yeah, jus’don’t stop…don’t stop…oh my god, I’m coming!” Your moan broke through your throat and he brought his other hand over your mouth to mute your sounds. Your arms hugged around him to keep yourself upright as your knees went weak and shook at the waves of pleasure coursing through you. Your walls were pulsing rapidly around his fingers as you rode it out. He removed his hand from your mouth as you started panting and wrapped it around your waist while his fingers continued fucking into you slowly to help you ease off of your climax. You angled up and kissed his lips before smiling giddily, your eyes all sparkly and heavy with lust.

“Y’good now?” He asked with a grin after a minute or two and you nodded.

“Yeah.” You confirmed and he let go of you and pulled out his fingers before sucking them clean. 

He tugged your skirt back down to where it was before your little romp session. Your lips met eagerly for several moments, smearing together and connecting fervently. As much as you wanted to, you couldn’t return the favor now, there wasn’t time. So you kissed him to show your gratitude for his immediate attention to your obvious need. 

“So after the afternoon session do you want t-” you paused when you thought you heard a door close.

“What’s-”

“Shhh.” You shushed him quickly and he froze as you definitely heard some movement in the control room. 

“Maybe they’re just grabbing something?” He whispered and you both stayed quiet trying to hear anything else, whoever it was wasn’t leaving.

“Where’s my underwear?” You asked him and he patted at his pocket and then glanced around to find that they had not stayed in his pocket.

“I think they fell out of my pocket in the live room somewhere.” He said and you groaned quietly. He peeked out a bit and saw them near the large amp you’d been sitting on before you moved into this little nook. “They fell out near the amp.” He said regretfully and you swore your brain melted from how embarrassed you were. If anyone walked into the live room they would surely see them. And then the worst thing that could happen did, you both heard the soft creak of the door to the live room opening.

“Shit!” You whispered and decided to just get out there. Maybe you could grab them before they even noticed and hurry out to the bathroom and Ricky would just stay hidden until the coast was clear. “OK, I’m gonna grab them. Just stay until I come get you.” You whispered and he nodded. You exhaled shakily and then stepped out of your little corner only see Harry Styles himself stop as he approached the piano bench, thankfully on the other side of the room. He smiled wide as soon as he saw you.

“Surprise!” He exclaimed through a chuckle and you reared back a bit, at least to kick your panties behind the amp so he wouldn’t see them on the floor. “Why are you backing away, come here!” He chuckled and you glanced down quickly to see they were hidden enough before hurrying over to him.

“W-what’re you doing here?” You asked him with a smile as he sighed and hugged around you and then squeezed a bit tighter. You were completely flustered now and distracted and he could feel the weirdness you were exuding as you cut your hug short.

“I just wanted to surprise you.” He explained and you nodded.

“That’s really sweet of you.” You said and he chuckled as he took you in for a moment.

“Are you OK?” He asked and you nodded quickly.

“Of course!”

“Are you sure? I mean, I know I kind of just showed up but I was expecting a little more enthusiasm form you after not seeing each other for months.” He chuckled and then the next worst thing happened, Ricky’s phone started ringing. Of course he had to have Patrick Star saying “Leedle-leedle-leedle-lee” as his ringtone. Your face fell into your hands in absolute mortification as Harry burst into laughter at the very random interruption, “Is that your ringtone?” He gasped through his laugh and you shook your head, still hiding your face in your hands. “Oh. Then…” he sighed and you glanced up at him, “Oh…” he said more quietly and you exhaled.

“Ummm, Ricky it’s fine. It’s Harry.” You said and he stepped out from the little hidden corner seconds later. He looked between you and Harry with painfully embarrassed smile. But he inhaled sharply and pushed the feelings aside.

“Hello Harry, I’m Ricky.” He said extending his hand out and you winced.

“Mmmm, maybe don’t do that right now.” You said softly and he glanced down at his hand and then pulled it back once he realized that he had just used that same hand to finger fuck you.

“Right, ummm…”

“Just, come here.” You said as you went behind him and gabbed his arms to corral him out of the studio and to the bathrooms. “And you, stay here please.” You called back at Harry who just nodded, still quite shocked at what he’d walked into and moments later you had emerged into the hall and exhaled shakily.

“Oh god, that was bad! That was so bad!” He panted nervously.

“I know! Fuck…”

“Did you get your underwear.”

“No! He was already in there, I just kicked them behind the amp.” You explained. “Look, I ummm, I think I need to talk to him alone for a little. Just go wash up and let everyone know to take another thirty or so?”

“Yeah, OK.” He nodded and then chuckled, “I’m sorry to put you in this position.”

“It’s fine, I was the one that was too impatient to wait until after.” You reminded and he chuckled.

“True…” he mused with a grin, “Ummm, well you go deal with that and I’ll go stall everyone a little.”

“Thank you.” You breathed out and then inhaled slowly.

“Hey, it’s gonna be fine. OK?” He smiled and you nodded with your bottom lip bitten beneath your front teeth out of nerves, you needed to take it out on something, “Go on.” He insisted and you turned around and headed back into the studio. When you entered the control room and looked out the large window into the live room Harry glanced back at you from his seat on the piano bench. You headed back in a bit timidly and he smiled at you.

“You alright?”

“Yeah! Sorry about that, it just…happened.” You explained bashfully and he nodded.

“Yeah, I get that.” He smiled, “S’good to put a face to the name.”

“Oh yeah…” you hummed and shook your head again. Harry chuckled and reached for your hand before hesitating.

“Is your hand clean?” He asked before grabbing it and you chuckled but nodded. “OK.” He hummed and stood before grabbing both of your hands and running his thumbs over your knuckles. “I’m fine.” He assured you, “Well…maybe fuming inside…just a little…” he confessed.

“Don’t worry, it was just that, not sex, m’not that crazy.”

“And I wonder whose idea that was, you little exhibitionist.” You teased and you shook your head as you giggled.

“Either way, ummm I am happy you’re here.” You said, “So can we have a do over?” You asked and he chuckled.

“Of course.” He said and released your hands before wrapping them around your shoulders and pulling you in. You hugged around him and leaned into him.

“I’m really happy to see you. Missed you.” 

“Me too.”

“So what made you come out here?” You asked and he pulled back a bit, his hands grabbed your face gently.

“The froggy picture.” He admitted and you laughed and he bit his lip as he watched you laugh. You were so pretty, he was glad he saved seeing you again for the first time for this face to face encounter.

“When I saw that little cardigan on him I just about died.” You recalled, giggled at the memory. “It’s so cute.”

“Yeah, it was cute.” He agreed, “You look so pretty today.” He complimented.

“Thanks. You too.” You hummed and he chuckled.

“Mmm…particularly like you in this skirt. Though it is a bit skimpy…” he pointed out and you smiled.

“Yeah, s’quite short.” You agreed.

“Then you might be…” he reached down and hooked on his index finger was your underwear, “needing these back.” He hummed and you felt your face heating in embarrassment as you glanced over to them and then to him. He was smirking and you reached for them and he raised them out of your reach. “Mmm…just a little higher, love.” 

“If I reach any higher my ass will show.” You laughed and he did as well.

“So unprofessional…” he mumbled and you rolled your eyes before looking deep into his eyes pleadingly.

“Please.” You insisted, “Would love it if I didn’t flash anyone at work today.” You said and he chuckled and lowered them so that you could reach for them but then pulled them away from you. 

“May I?” He asked and you bit your lip. He smirked at your response, “I’ll take that as a yes.” He hummed and stepped forwards, effectively backing you up until you bumped into the piano, the higher keys at the end clanked discordantly as your weight pressed them down and your gazes met as you both sniggered in amusement at the happy little accident. The sound seemed to reverberate forever, that’s how tense it was between you two. He crouched down and spread them out for you, allowing you to step into them as he stood and pulled them up your legs and finally over your center. He really tried his best not to look or lean in when he got them up to your pussy. He knew you were wet, but it was not from what he had walked in on, it was all for him. It probably had been all along, he didn’t want to assume, but he hoped. He really hoped. “There you are.” He hummed as his fingers fixed the straps along your hips, tugging on them a bit to straighten them out.

“Thank you.” You said softly.

“Of course.” He smiled as he fixed your skirt again and placed his hands on your hips. You suddenly smiled even wider and he giggled, “What’s that cute little smile about, then?”

“Nothing. Just thinking that you’ve never… I don’t think you’ve ever done that before?” You shrugged.

“Mmm…surely I have.” He mused, his face scrunching a bit in thought, “Or not…maybe not…” he decided a few seconds later. “I’m glad I was clever enough to pull it off.”

“Oh yeah, that was…a moment.”

“Core memory?” He smirked.

“Oh yeah, core memory.” You smiled and just hugged him again and he hummed happily, “You’re staying, right?”

“Yeah, if you want me to.” He mumbled and you pulled back.

“Yeah, of course. Could use some of your expertise. A little Styles sparkle.” You flirted.

“I like that!” He chuckled, “M’stealing it.”

“Okay.” You giggled. “Caitlyn’s friend, Melissa, from the pilates studio? Well she’s my friend too kinda, but more Cait’s. Either way, she’s having a little pool party with cocktails. It’s a casual thing. If you wanna come, I’m sure we’ll end up ordering in.”

“Oh yeah, that sounds nice.” He smiled. “I-is Ricky coming?” He asked.

“Ummm, maybe? If you don’t mind?” He shook his head and you squinted your eyes suspiciously.

“I swear.” He chuckled.

“OK.” You said softly. You let each other go and then grabbed your phone from a music stand a few feet away. 

“Have you eaten?” He asked

“Nope.”

“Want to go pick something up together?” He asked and you nodded.

“Sure.” You said and soon you were heading off to the closest thing before heading back to the studio with your food.

It was nice sitting with him while you two ate and talked casually about your music and what you wanted out of it. You were trying to find the words to describe what you wanted this project to be and what you wanted it to evoke. You missed talking to him about this kind of thing. Harry just had a real gift for expressing everything he was trying to express when he made his music. And at the moment, you felt like your vision just wasn’t cohesive, or at least you felt that way.

“…I don’t know, I’m a bit lost on this process, I guess.” You decided finally when you started bouncing between ideas, “I don’t even know why I wanted to do an album anymore…” you confessed with some sadness.

“What initially pushed you to decide?”

“I think seeing you, the weird things with Seb…I mean, I just feel kind of like things have taken a twist I didn’t expect. And I’m just…lost. I feel lost, even though I shouldn’t be. I feel like what I need to do next in life is kinda a no brainer, but-”

“A no brainer to who?” He asked and you shrugged, “Everyone I guess. But I also feel…like…I’m in a glass house.” You said and he hummed, “I feel like everything right now is really fragile right now. With my heart and my head…with this album, I know that it’s been a while so I need t-to deliver, I mean obviously. And then w-with us too.” You explained and he hummed, “I just don’t even know where to start to be honest. And I think…that shows in the music. It’s going to be a big, fat flop.” You chuckled sadly, “I can just feel it. It’s murky…”

“I mean, you always know what I think. At the end of the day you have to like what you produced. And you have to be proud of it. I get that we do this for a living, but it’s also our entire heart and mind in those songs. All the things we’ve dealt with during this time, the joys the sorrows…I mean, that’s what we’re putting out there for everyone to judge and feeling like it doesn’t make sense anymore can be scary. But honestly, things don’t make sense for a lot people out there, and hearing that just might help them feel not so shitty about it.” He said and you hummed.

“Is it crazy that I really want to embrace another sound? I don’t even know what it falls under, but I just want it to sound exactly how I hear it in my brain.” You explained, “Like…” you paused and chuckled, “there are lines I wrote while I was like at the grocery store or stuck in traffic, and like I can only hear them in that setting. Like just to show how banal my life is, you know? Like, I want to put in the beep of the check out machine in or staticky radio chatter about the heat wave, my alarm going off in the morning, the chirp of the fire alarm I haven’t changed…I was thinking of maybe putting in some like voice notes between the tracks, like texts with friends, or little things I make to remember what I need to buy at the store. Like I want it to be like a day through my perspective I guess…almost like the music is narrating a routine?” You explained and he nodded and smiled.

“I think that’s really cool.” He said and you bit your lip.

“It’s not too…messy and chaotic?”

“No, it is for sure, the layering is going to be insane.” He said and you chuckled and nodded, “But it’s a cool concept. Like basically if your life was a kind of like a musical.” He said and your eyes widened.

“Exactly.” You sighed and smiled, “Wow…who knew a word for that already existed.” You chuckled and he did as well, “I was struggling for a while there trying to describe what I wanted. Thank you!” You said and he chuckled.

“Happy to help.”

When everyone returned you shared a more clear idea of what it was that you wanted. You wanted things to be a little odd but as real as possible. This helped your producers and sound engineers adjust what they were doing a bit to make editing easier on themselves. At some point Harry was at the help of the control panel, pressing buttons and raising and lowering settings, asking you to go again.

“Hey man, how about in that bit there where she ends the bridge, she does the final chorus in an octave lower and we fade it out from studio into the raw audio. I believe this is one of the songs where the demo is from her voice notes.” Ricky suggested and Harry smiled.

“Yeah actually, that’s sick.” He nodded and then he told you what Ricky was thinking. “He says we can layer them and blend it, so just try the chorus in a lower octave and the rest will be done via editing.” He instructed and gave him a thumbs up before running it again. 

After another couple of hours of working, your day was coming to an end. Everyone started cleaning up after themselves and you invited Ricky to Melissa’s place and soon he was heading off and assuring you he’d be there later. Harry was chatting with one of the other sound engineers, Billy, as you looked around the space one final time to ensure you weren’t leaving anything behind for the night.

“I was just telling Harry that now what you were asking of us makes a lot more sense.” Billy said and you chuckled.

“See. I wasn’t crazy!”  

“Yeah… it’s gonna be cool, what you’re doing.”

“Thank you. I think so too. I mean, I know I enjoy those kinds of things when I listen to music, so I hope others like it as well.”

“Oh yeah, people are suckers for that.” He smiled, “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Billy said to you, “And it was nice to meet you.” He said to Harry, “Will you be joining us again?”

“Ummm…” Harry said as he glanced over to you.

“Well, you’re always welcome. You know that.” You said to him and he smiled.

“Then I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” He said and Billy chuckled. You guys exchanged a few more words before Billy headed out.

“So where are you staying?” You asked as you put things into your tote bag.

“Not sure yet. I don’t know how long I’m staying for, so I didn’t want to book a hotel indefinitely, you know?”

“Yeah, I get that.” You hummed, “Well if you need a place to crash for a bit I’ve got an extra room. Caitlyn already claimed one room.” You said and he chuckled.

“Of course she has…” he grinned and you smiled, “Well yeah, if it’s no bother. And like, I know that I came for you-”

“That’s what she said.” You slipped in and he laughed and rolled his eyes as you giggled.

“Real funny…now, I know that I came here to see you, but I’d also understand if you didn’t want me in your house.” He chuckled.

“I’d love you in my house.” You said and he smiled.

“Then let’s get going.” He responded and you grinned.

*****************

“Welcome!” You chirped as you opened the back door to let Harry in with his big ass suitcase.

“Thanks.” He chuckled.

“Do you remember where my room is?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, well yours is the one right beside it.” You said and he nodded and took off. You put your bag down to wash the tumbler you used for your coffee that morning. And after that you headed off to get changed. When you passed by Harry was just stripping off his pants and you turned away quickly before rushing into your room. You first got your shirt off and then got your make up off. You’d be swimming anyway, so it was pointless to have it on. Once you got done with that you went to pick out a bathing suit which you quickly changed into. You were throwing your skirt back on when Harry announced himself. “What’s up?” You asked and he came over to your closet.

“Nothing, just wondering what was taking you so long.”

“Oh, sorry. I was taking off my makeup. Let me just grab a shirt.” You said and just grabbed the first one within reach and threw it on. You slid your feet into your sandals and then tugged at his shirt as you breezed past him. “Let’s go.”

“Hey…hey, hey, hey come here.” He said reaching around you and stopping you as you giggled.

“What?” You asked him and he just hugged you and released a long exhale. You smiled and rubbed over his back softly, fingers dancing across his shirt as you held him for a little while. 

“I’m really happy to be here.” He spoke quietly.

“Oh me too, H. I missed you a lot. It was getting hard not to hear from you.” You spoke softly before tiptoeing and kissing low on his cheek. His lips twitched up in a little smile and you ran your thumb over his bottom lip. He kissed the pad of your thumb a couple times before letting you go and grabbing your face, pulling you in closer to him.

“Can I?” He asked and you nodded quickly. 

Just a moment later his lips were pushing and pulling against your own slowly in a deep and emotional kiss. It was nostalgic and magical; your body felt alive and tingly all over. Moreover, the raw emotion of the tension finally bursting was overwhelming in the best way. It felt like you had just jumped into a cool pool on a hot summer’s day. You were so in the moment that you forgot to breathe, so you suddenly pulled back to do so. And his mouth chased after yours, pecking around your lips as you inhaled sharply. When your eyes blinked open and met his, you smiled and his cheeks went all warm and pink. Suddenly you were transported back to the time when you had kissed for the very first time. He was smiling then too, relieved to have kissed you. And you were in mental shambles as you relished in what had just happened. It felt like the beginning again. He started to pull back and you arched up and kissed him again.

“Not yet.” You whispered and he sighed and pulled you closer. His thumbs stroked over your cheeks as your lips met over and over again in soft little pecks in between deep kisses. Your noses nuzzled against each other for a few seconds.

“D’you wanna drive?”

“Yeah, sure.” You smiled and were heading off a few minutes later.

****************

Harry was actually having a nice time at this pool party/dinner thing. He was glad he had come because he needed the distraction. He was afraid of the conversation he was going to have with you about polyamory and how he believed that he fit under this category. He was nervous because of how this had impacted his previous relationship. He had spent the past couple months talking to his therapist every couple of weeks on the phone to help him through the depression and grief of his relationship. His therapist mentioned that a friend of hers is a sex therapist and she asked him if he would be interested in having her come sit in on a few of their sessions and then take the lead for a few about this new discovery he had made about himself and he agreed and he would be meeting her for the first time the following day.

He had also been keeping a keen eye on the interactions between you and Ricky. Ricky and him kept making awkward eye contact and he was acting really relaxed with you. He figured it was because Ricky was a bit intimidated or still feeling weird about him walking in on you guys. Either way, Harry was being more of a spectator for now.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” You asked as you came up to him after emerging from the pool.

“Nothing, just watching everyone. Thinking…”

“About?”

“Me. You. Us…” he said as he made space on the big chaise lounge he was on. 

He patted the space beside him and you climbed on, legs crossed as you faced him and you extended your hand out towards his and just grazed your fingers over his own discreetly before pulling away. This little gesture transported Harry back to your fifth date. He remembered it so clearly, you guys had gone out to eat and even though you had a private dinging area, he still wouldn’t hold your hand because he was worried that someone might see and then it would all get out and things would surely go to shit. He remembered because he did that same gesture to you that you’d just done to him. Just a feather of a touch to ease your need and want to be closer to him in that moment. 

“Did you feel…invalidated when we were together?” He asked, seemingly out of the blue and you hummed pensively. “Like not seen or maybe…less important than you were to me?”

“Maybe a little bit at the start but it went away quickly. I knew it was because of the band and all those crazy rules they had for you guys.” You said and he nodded, “But after all that ended I was expecting you to change a little bit? Lax up about being together in public and things like that.” You explained, “I didn’t feel like you hid us because I wasn’t good enough for you. I know all that was sort of a deal breaker for you then, so I just went along with it because I mean, I hadn’t dated anyone with your level of fame before. I just figured you knew the best way to deal and go about that.” You shrugged and he hummed.

“What you did just now, touched my hand?” He said and you nodded, urging him to continue, “I did that to you, on our fifth date. You just wanted to hold my hand over the table top at the restaurant.” He chuckled sadly, “And I wouldn’t. Do you remember?” 

“Vaguely.”

“We were in some tiny little private dining room…” he reminded you.

“Oh yeah…” you hummed.

“I’m sorry.”

“For?”

“That.” He said and you hummed. “I wish I had been braver. And I feel the same now. I think if I had listened to other people and been more open and braver about the things I think or feel sometimes then maybe I wouldn’t be so carelessly hurtful towards others.”

“You’re not a hurtful person, H. At least not intentionally. You have concerns and fears and doubts like everyone else and sometimes that can affect how you relate to and interact with others. But I mean, you dealt with things the best way you knew how at the time, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Then, good. You did your best to protect what we had and I trusted you and your approach. I don’t hold it against you.” You said and he nodded.

“So just now then, you didn’t do that because you’re like…conditioned to be unaffectionate towards me in public?” He asked and you smiled and shook your head.

“No, it was just a little reassuring thing.”

“Okay.” He smiled, “You can, by the way. I want to hold your hand.” He said as he reached for yours resting flat over your thigh.

“Oh, like right now?” 

“Yeah. Can I?” He asked.

“Yeah, if you want to.” You smiled.

“Do you want me to though?”

“Yeah!” You laughed a bit and he smiled and pulled your hand into the small space between your bodies. His fingers intertwined with yours and you smiled up at him.

The one thing that you kept feeling was eager anticipation. You loved Harry at the core of who he was and every part of him that you’d known and experienced over the years. The prospect of getting to know him again, this version of him that you were the most unfamiliar with, it was exciting. Even just being around him you felt in tune, on the same wave length as him. When your gazes met you felt curiosity and interest in understanding what was going on in his brain in a far deeper way than before. You’d happily spend the rest of your days learning about him and loving who he was now and who he would become over time. You smiled to yourself as you thought of him in 10-15 years, with you. Happy, fulfilled, it was making you emotional.

“Hey, what’s on your mind?” He asked softly.

“You.” You responded, you didn’t mean for it to come out as a whisper, but it did. You were just so in your head now as you gave thought to all of this. To all of him.

“What about me? You seem like you’re about to cry.” He said lowly with a bit of concern.

“They’d be happy tears then.” You assured him and he smiled. “Was just thinking about you, how far you’ve come. Well, the both of us, and how I’m jus so excited t-to get to know you again. And just thinking about the future, like…what we can have. Like…we’re different than…five years ago, you know?”

“Yeah, a little more grown up.” He smiled.

“A lot more grown up.” You chuckled, “And I think it could only get better the older we get.” You said and he smiled.

“It will.” He said decisively, “I’m also excited about getting to know you in a deeper way again.” He said and you smiled as a comfortable silence took over for a minute or so. But then he spoke up again, “Honestly, I don’t think there’s a reality in which I wouldn’t be in love with you.” He confessed with a bashful smile and your gaze softened as it met his own, “I mean that.”

“I know. I feel the same way.” You responded, your heart was pounding so hard you felt it in your throat. 

Harry just smiled and let his thumb smooth over your knuckles as you just looked at each other. His eyes flickered between your own, taking in every possible detail. He loved how the sun streaks showed off the pattern of your irises. He loved how you looked back at him with so much adoration. He wanted everything with you. He couldn’t even contain the fluttering feeling in his tummy as he thought about you when you had a baby with him and looked at them the way you were looking at him now. With love, acceptance, pride, and every other good feeling and intention you could muster up.

“I need you to know that we’re making it this time.” He whispered and you nodded.

“Yeah we are.” You whispered back with a smile.

*********************

You were quite nervous as you made it back from the studio the next day. You’d had a great and productive day and you hoped Harry had too. You were feeling a vast range of emotions as you tried to picture where the conversation would end up. Especially after the intimate things you had told each other the evening before. You had even called your mom on your lunch break to just get all the irrational, anxiety inducing things off of your chest. She was excited for the possibility of you and Harry working things out after all this time. She and your father loved how he looked after you and were very supportive of your relationship with him back then and it was no different now, he and his family had left a really great impression on them. And your family on his, you still spoke to Anne and Gemma and a few of his cousins for birthdays and little things like that. Obviously, you kept a respectful distance, especially since he dated quite quickly after, but you had grown to love the people in his life too. 

“Hello?” You spoke out into the car when you answered his incoming call.

“Hey, love. Just checking if I can open any of the wine bottles you have? Or are some special?”

“Nah, have at it.” You assured him.

“Perfect. Are you close by?”

“Yeah, about 10 minutes away.”

“Great! See you soon.” He hummed, “Be safe.”

“Thanks, H.” You hummed and he hung up.

*****************

As soon as you made it inside you were greeted with an absolutely divine aroma and “Always Alright” by Alabama Shakes was playing from the kitchen. You bopped your head along as you pushed the door back and it landed into the frame with a loud thump.

“I’m home!” You called out as you toed out of your sneakers and just as you were about to make it to the living room Harry was coming to the entrance with a glass of wine for you in hand. 

“Hey, how was it today?”

“Good, we wrapped up the ones that might be the singles so it was a productive day.” You said with a smiled as you guys hugged briefly and kissed cheeks.

“That’s great.” He hummed as he handed over the glass and you thanked him softly before taking a sip.

“Mmmm.” Your eyebrows perked up as the sour and crisp wine tingled on your tongue. “Which one did you open?” You only had three bottles of white wines as it wasn’t your favorite variety. So the flavors of it were not as obvious to you.

“The chablis.” 

“Oh…good choice.” You complimented and he smiled.

“Yeah?” You nodded and he hummed. “Well c’mon then.” He said and you followed after him to the kitchen.

“How was your day?” You asked.

“Also quite productive. I found two potential places, so there’s that.”

“And in therapy?”

“Really good too.” He smiled and you nodded.

“Good. I’m glad.” You hummed, “Do you need my help with anything?”

“No, just sit. Wanna plate it all nice for you.” He said and you smiled.

“Wow, thank you.” 

“Of course.” He smiled as he plated up the baby potato and veg mix on the plate and then he lifted the sheet of tin foil placed over the pan on the stove, “They had some really great sea bass fillets at Erewhon. I couldn’t resist.” He hummed.

“How much did they cost you?” You asked with a grin and he chuckled.

“I’m not ready to talk about it.” He mumbled with a smirk and you giggled. “Here you are love.” He said handing you a plate and you grabbed it quickly.

“Wow, so beautiful.” You complimented, “The skin is so crisp.” You slightly moaned as you ran your fork over it. “I’m so excited to eat this.” You praised him and bit down on your lip in excitement. Harry grinned bashfully as he served up his own plate and soon he was settling in beside you and then you guys started eating. You made some light conversation and hummed to the music playing in the background of your conversation while you guys ate your dinner. Everything was so delicious you even went in for another helping of the veggies. “Wow…this is may be on of the best things I’ve eaten in a long time.” You said in satisfaction. “The fish was so buttery. It just melted in your mouth…damn.” You smiled, “You did so good! I’m so impressed.” You chuckled.

“Yeah?” He smiled as he reached for your hand and you nodded again. “Glad you liked it. Got the recipe from Shellie.” He said and you hummed.

“Ooh nice. She’s a good cook.” You recalled and he nodded.

“And I made some cereal milk panna cotta for desert. Should be set by now.”

“Ooh, fancy!” You chirped with excitement. You washed the remaining dishes as he brought out the panna cottas and then headed over to your patio, he balanced the little ramekins in one hand as he unlatched the glass door and slid it open and stepped outside. You dried your hands and grabbed your glasses of wine as you headed over as well and cozied into one of the seats outside.

“So?” You asked and he smiled at you.

“So…I think that I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that I am probably polyamorous.” He explained and you nodded in understanding.

“Okay and what does that…look like for you?” You asked him.

“Ummm…for me it’s largely about the fact that I can connect romantically with multiple people simultaneously. I have felt it before but just thought of it as like a crush…because I had never fully fallen in love with any of those people or just stopped myself from talking to them more because I was already seeing someone. And I mean, to me, you’re the biggest love of my life. And when we didn’t work I just…I wanted to feel that way again and so I searched for it and I did fall in love with Olivia and Taylor all w-while being in love with you the entire time. I see now that I buried what I felt for you, but it was never gone.” He explained and you nodded in understanding, “I told Taylor once that she wasn’t competing with you for my love, that I loved you and loved her in your own unique ways. D-does that make sense to you?”

“Yeah, H. It does.” You assured as you dipped into your panna cotta and he hummed ‘good’ before he did the same. You sat silently for a little bit, watching the sun starting to move closer and closer to the horizon.

“And say, what if we get married and somewhere along the way I…fall in love with someone else? Can you accept that?” He asked and you shrugged.

“I can tell you that I can right now…but I mean, maybe that will change if we get married or have kids or something…” you said with all honesty. “But I mean, i-if that’s how it is then I’d expect to have boundaries or rules for what’s acceptable if we’re the married ones.”

“Yeah, I get that.” He nodded, “So, my therapist brought in a friend of hers, a sex therapist, t-to talk about this with me. To answer any questions and to help prep me for this talk I wanted to have with you.” He explained and you nodded urging him to go on, “So poly people can have different types of relationships and she was explaining them to me to see what resonated with me the most and I think a hierarchal approach or a polyfidelity approach is more in line with me.” He explained and you nodded.

“Okay, so what does that mean?”

“So in the hierarchal one the main relationship is the priority. So say we started a relationship, to me that would be my main relationship. If I met anyone who I was interested in I would run that by you. Like we would work out what any other potential partners would have access to together. And polyfidelity can be like, I have two relationships but they’re closed relationships on both ends. And well, it’s not like I’d actively be seeking out someone else to involve in my life, this is just an option in case I meet someone who I develop feelings for. I have no desire to have an open relationships or even sexual or dating relationships with other people just because. I would only want that if I even met anyone that I just had that deep of a connection with.” He explained.

“So like with Taylor…if she was okay with this…what would you prefer or?”

“I would kind of leave that up to her. I think she might have preferred a hierarchal thing though. Where if we were together first then that relationship is the priority and together we could set the boundary for what our relationship would look like. So say she was only fine with us dating and sleeping together when I was in California, then that’s what we would have. I think that a polyfidelity thing would be what I’d prefer in that case. I mean, I know that you guys wouldn’t be sleeping with other people, just me. And I wouldn’t say either one was more important than the other, we wouldn’t even have to do things together, each relationship would be what it is.” He said and you hummed as you gave it some thought.

“Wouldn’t that be…exhausting?” You asked and he chuckled.

“I don’t know…maybe.” He said pensively, “But like…to me, the way Taylor loved me didn’t feel the same as the way you love me, and vise versa. And then the way I loved you both also came out differently. I didn’t feel more for you than her, but it was just different. Does that… make sense to you?” He asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, that’s extremely logical.” You said and he chuckled.

“Are you just saying that?” He questioned skeptically.

“No!” You giggled, “I’m serious. I mean, there’s this quote from Ted Lasso that I really love and that I live by now. The quote is: “All people are different people.” And I mean, it’s so obvious and simple, but it’s something that we forget far too easily. So when you say that the way you felt love from and for us was different, it makes sense. Each person loves differently and has different needs. Our energies are different, you know? Of course it feels different with another person. Each relationship is going to be as unique as the people in it.”

“Right, it’s not like a competition between who I love more.” He said and you nodded.

“Right.” You confirmed and he smiled and then frowned. “What it is?”

“I don’t think I had the proper words to explain this to Taylor when I first told her about you. Maybe if I had more knowledge or simply just accepted and understood this part of myself before I could’ve hurt her less. Like, I’ve apologized and explained and we’ve forgiven each other for any hurt we caused each other, but I just…feel bad for how I affected her.”

“Yeah, of course. That’s understandable. I’m glad you guys got to talk that out eventually though. Is she better now? When was the last time you saw her?”

“Ummm, early June?” He hummed, “She looked so much lighter than when we were together. She was back to her old self and it was hard to see how badly what we had was affecting her.” He explained, “That’s really what pushed me into the depression phase. Just seeing how much better off she was without me. It just…fed my fear that I only hurt the people I love.” He said and you hummed. 

“Do you think that if you’d known this about yourself with certainty before that she would’ve been alright with it?”

“Absolutely not.” He chuckled, “Her concern was that I’d start to love you more than her and like fall out of love with her and just leave her for you.”

“Mmm, well at the risk of sounding like a total dick…isn’t that just what happens when a relationship starts to…fall apart? You start to fall out of love with someone for whatever reason? Like that’s just what can happen to anyone. It’s part of the general risk of being in a relationship, no?” You asked and he chuckled.

“That’s basically what I said to her one time. I just said it less delicately, but it really offended her. But it’s the truth, feelings can change at any time for any number of reasons. And I mean, I did love her, I think I still do a little bit, obviously.” He said and you nodded, “But I’m starting to move past it. See with you I…thought I was moving past it.” He said, “Thought that this whole time. The sex therapist? She was basically saying that in me moving on so quickly, I was just…distracting myself from having to properly move on from you basically. And like…seeing each other again after so long, I mean…it just brought everything up for me again and it almost felt like we had broken up a week before. I missed you terribly and I was constantly thinking about you and Sebastian and I just…I had to say something to Taylor about it.”

“Yeah, that makes sense.” You said and he sighed.

“I guess, I’m still figuring things out in terms of this polyamory thing. But again, I just want to reassure you that I’m not actively seeking another partner, nor am I interested in dating or sleeping with other people at this time. If it happens, it happens, but obviously if it takes away from what we have going together then our relationship would take priority over that. I do believe that we connect in a very special and extraordinary way. I love and miss what we had before, but after seeing you again last year and with the time we’ve spent together already I absolutely cannot wait to see how good we can be together this time around.” He said and you smiled and just got up and climbed into his lap and hugged him tight.

“I love you.” You hummed and he sighed in relief.

“I love you too.” He answered as he hugged your waist tight for a few moments until you pulled back from him to be able to look into his eyes.

“So where do we go from here? What are you comfortable with?” You asked him.

“Well, we don’t have to rush into a relationship. I mean, I know we love each other, but I want to date you. I want to reacquaint myself with you and fall in love with the you, you are now all over again.” He said and you smiled a bit, “I also want to make sure that I’m not using us a distraction to finish moving on from Taylor.” He said and you nodded.

“Yeah, of course.” You agreed, “I mean, if you still have feelings for her do you think that maybe you might want to keep that door open?” You asked him and he shook his head.

“Yeah, she’s not on board with the polyamory thing at all. It just wouldn’t work for her.”

“Right…right.” You said and he nodded.

“Ummm baby, I have to ask because I can’t stop thinking about it.” He sighed and you nodded, “Wh-what’s the situation with Ricky?” He asked, evidently he was a bit nervous about asking you, you could see it in his eyes.

“It’s still just a friends with benefits thing. We don’t really hook up on the regular, like it’s not a planned, routine thing we do. It’s more opportunistic.” You explained.

“So the other day was like a fluke, basically?”

“For sure. I would never normally do something like that, especially while we’re in a professional setting.” You explained, “But I was just a little more…needy than usual.” You chuckled.

“Mmm, I see. I only ask because if I’m gonna stay here for a bit, like I just don’t want to make you guys feel weird if he’s like constantly around or staying over too.” He explained. “Like we kept making awkward eye contact yesterday at the pool party thing and like…yeah. I’m not…like it’s not a jealousy thing. I’m not jealous of him.” He said quickly.

“Just fuming inside a little?” You teased, repeating his words from the other day at the studio.

“Yeah, just a bit.” He chuckled, “Still.” He confessed.

“Don’t. To answer your question more seriously, Ricky doesn’t stay overnight here. Ever. And I don’t stay overnight at his either. We literally do the most to not blur any lines even more than they already are.” You explained.

“So you just…fuck and go?” He asked.

“It’s not that transactional.” You chuckled. “It’s usually after we’ve gone out with friends or just hung out together. And if we both want to hook up we do and then we go our separate ways.” You explained. “We really don’t do sleepovers or even like lovey-dovey things like cuddles or holding hands. It’s just the sexual favors bit. Like we might lay around for a bit, but we just talk, we don’t like…hold each other and…bask in the afterglow.” You said with a giggle and he nodded.

“And it doesn’t feel….empty? Without the soft bits?” He asked you more seriously.

“Of course it does.” You smiled a bit sadly, “I think it does for the both of us. He’s hung up on someone else and well…same.” You said and he smiled and nodded, “So we just hook up when we’re both feeling in the mood for it. So we really are friends first and the benefits are there when needed.” You explained and he nodded in understanding.

“So if it’s one of those times when you guys talk afterwards, like is it feedback about the sex or just random conversation?” He asked.

“Just conversations. Like sometimes we talk about the people we miss and things about them. We talk about how we’re feeling afterwards, like sometimes when that post-coital haze is lifted you just get so sad, you know? So we talk about that and try and figure out why we might feel sad. We talk about what the point of all of it is…I think we’ve achieved a rather deep level of friendship from this.” You said pensively.

“And you don’t like him even just a little bit?” He asked you.

“I mean, of course I do. I hook up with him, don’t I?” You chuckled and he did as well, “But it’s very surface level. We did talk about that one time, about what would happen if we ended up together. We both decided it would be a no-go.” You chuckled, “He’s just so…unworried and unbothered by everything. Doesn’t really plan or anything and well, you know how that drives me crazy. Especially with the job we have.” You said and he chuckled and nodded. “I’m definitely more balanced with my time now than I was before but it’s because I’ve been able to schedule and plan and whatnot. Like he’s kind of the type to get bored on a Tuesday and drive down to TJ with a friend or his sister because they want tacos from Taconazo. Like, I don’t have the same freedom to just do things on a whim without it throwing a bunch of things out of whack for myself.”

“Right.” He hummed, “So you…like him? Like you’re into him?” He asked and you looked at him quite perplexed, “Like in the way you like me?” He clarified.

“Are you asking if I like him more than you? Or are you asking if I…like him and you? Simultaneously.” You asked and he nodded. “I mean, I do like you both, but not in the same way as you do. Like, I definitely like you more, I mean, I love you, you know? I wouldn’t be able to love you and him. I would have to choose.” You said and he smiled.

“And you’d choose me.” He said quite confidently and you rolled your lips into each other to prevent your lips from widening in a grin as you shrugged. “Baby.” He pressed more seriously and you giggled.

“I mean…”

“Say it then.” He smiled smugly.

“Why? If you already know?” You asked.

“Because. I want to hear you say it for me.” He insisted. “Tell me you’d choose me. Every single time.” He hummed with a smile and you grabbed his face tenderly and leaned in until your lips were pressed together. 

Harry hummed in satisfaction as his hands slid down your waist and to your hips. His thumbs gently kneaded at the pudgy part of your hips. You giggled when it tickled you a bit and he chuckled before sucking on your bottom lip a bit. Your eyes fluttered open and met his lustful gaze. You could feel him hardening up beneath you as he leaned back in for a hungry kiss. Your lips moved sloppily, it was all tongue and heavy breathing as your slid down and held at the side of his neck. His hands were groping at your butt now, smoothing his big warm palms over them, helping you grind over him and feel his obvious need for you. You pulled back and pecked his lips a few times before taking a proper breath.

“I choose you, baby.” You confirmed quietly between the two of you. He looked into your eyes, his lust was evident.

“It would be wise to stop, wouldn’t it?” He asked and you giggled and nodded before kissing him a few more times and hugging him tight. After a few moments you pulled back and smiled at him and he bit his lip and reached around the back of your neck and pulled you down and kissed you deeply once more.

…. A FEW WEEKS LATER ….

It was your birthday and you were having fun so far at the little dinner party you had thrown yourself at your place. You felt pretty in the short black linen dress you’d chosen for yourself. You were nursing a cocktail as you chatted with those who had already arrived, you were waiting for a few more people, including Harry. You had hired on a private chef to take care of dinner tonight so that you could enjoy with everyone, after all, you only turn thirty once.

“So when did Harry move out of here?”

“A few weeks ago? He only stayed about a week. He was able to find himself a decent sized house really quickly. It was furnished, so it was rather convenient, it’s cute.” You smiled as you shared this with Melissa who nodded.

“That’s great!”

“Yeah.” You smiled in agreement.

“Sooo…any progress?” she asked with an expecting look.

“We’re not talking about that.” You said to her and she sighed in some disappointment.

“Fine.” She said with a smile. You appreciated that she didn’t push any further.

In truth, you and Harry had been mostly seeing each other at the studio after he left your house. You had both been scared into keeping things extremely platonic after that dinner he had prepared for you when you guys talked about your future. You had said you were going to take it slow and ended up half naked on your bed just about to initiate sex when you asked him to stop in a panic. The entire week he stayed with you the sexual tension was completely overboard, but you both knew it was for the best to not get involved with each other like that yet. So it was quite a big relief to you both when he left and you only saw each other at the studio. This would be his first time back at your place after he left so you were a little bit nervous in all honestly, which is why you had refused taking a shot three times already, you needed to be fully sober in order to not act impulsively.

“Harry!” You heard Caitlyn greet him excitedly from inside. You straightened up a bit and sucked a bit more of your drink though the straw. “Harry’s here!” Caitlyn announced as she led him out and everyone greeted him happily as he approached you and you smiled and stood to hug him.

“Happy birthday.” He hummed as he squeezed you tightly, “Welcome to thirty.” He said as he pulled back and you smiled.

“Thank you.” You chuckled.

“You look beautiful.” He said more quietly, his compliment slightly drowned out by everyone’s chatter.

“Oh, thank you.” You said as you glanced down at your dress quickly and then back into his eyes. He licked over his lips as he scanned over your face and then smiled bashfully when he realized he’d been caught.

“Sorry.” He hummed and you smiled.

“It’s alright. Ummm, have a seat.” You said gesturing to the table and well, the only spots available were at the further end of the table.

“You can sit here, Harry. I actually need to talk to Ben.” Melissa said as she stood up and headed further down the table.

“May I?” Harry asked and you nodded.

“Of course.” You agreed and he sat there. It’d been two or three days since you’d spoken, you were busy finalizing everything with the party and Harry had therapy and some catching up to do with other friends he had in the area.

“So, how’s it been planning all this?”

“A little stressful, but I think it ended up well.” You smiled and he nodded.

“Yeah, it looks really nice. S’a simple, little thing. I like that.” He said and you nodded.

“Yeah, thank you.”

“I ummm, I got you something that I want to show you later, I-if I can hang out a little after everyone goes.”

“Oh okay.” You nodded and he smiled. Your curiosity was piqued and all throughout the evening you kept thinking back on this and wondering what it could be. 

You were having a nice time with everyone, you guys were playing games and sharing stories. You had a delicious, fresh peach pie instead of a cake and everyone seemed so delighted with that choice. The chef really knocked it out of the park with that one. Afterwards, there was a bit of karaoke but when it hit 10:30 you guys started to wind down as to not disturb your neighbors. Slowly, your friends started to head out one by one, congratulating you once more on your birthday and you were thanking them for coming as you walked them out to their cars. Harry, Caitlyn, Ricky, and Melissa had stayed inside talking a bit more but you suspected that they were also getting ready to go, well except Harry. You guys hung around a bit more, the glances between you and Harry were nothing short of obvious and frequent, so being the one person to read the room, Ricky suddenly stood up.

“Well, it’s almost 11:30, we should go.” He said as he stretched his arms above his head a bit and once they got his hint, Caitlyn and Melissa stood as well. You and Harry followed them to the door and you all said your goodbyes. “Don’t be scared of falling.” Ricky mumbled quietly against the side of your head and you squeezed him tighter.

“Thank you for everything. Love you, I appreciate you.” You mumbled.

“Me too.” He chuckled before you kissed cheeks and he was hurrying after Melissa and Caitlyn down the little path. 

You and Harry followed after them and waved them off before you locked the gate as Harry made his way back to the house. You felt nervous around him for some reason, like his energy was too great to allow you to breathe, or maybe that was the alcohol…you’d had three cocktails which was already a bit much for you by this point and you were convinced your friends made your last one a double without your permission. Regardless, you were smiling at him while he watched you come up.

“What’s wrong?” He asked and you shook your head.

“You’re making me nervous.” You chuckled.

“What? Why?”

“This mystery gift thing!” You scoffed as you guys made it inside and he locked up behind you.

“Yeah alright, fair.” He smiled as you headed to the kitchen.

“Want some water?” You asked as you headed into the kitchen.

“Please. Benny made the last drinks a double and that awful taste is not leaving my mouth.” He confessed with a slight grimace.

“I knew it!” You gasped and he chuckled, “They were trying to get me to do shots before you arrived.” You said and he chuckled.

“Well good thing you declined. You really don’t want a hangover at thirty.” He laughed and you did as well and soon you were both having a bit of water and then he sighed.

“Okay, well it’s two things.” He said and you nodded, “First gift is this…” he said pulling his phone out and after several moments of waiting, he looked back to you, “You should check your email. The personal one.” He said and you nibbled on you lip and went to grab your phone that was on the other side of the kitchen counter. You open up your email account and saw the link to a ticket and when you opened it up your free hand flew over your mouth and your eyes welled up.

“No…but th-these sold out in like five minutes!” You gasped in surprise at the Joni Mitchell ticket waiting to be accepted by you.

“I’m her friend.” He said simply and you shook your head in disbelief. 

She was playing two dates at the Hollywood Bowl and despite your best efforts during the sale in February, they sold out in moments. It was a bittersweet thing, seeing artists that were such icons and legends performing what would surely be some of their last shows ever. Being able to make it to things like this made for priceless memories and well, you grew up with Joni Mitchell, like Harry did, and you both loved her. It was one of the things that you both had in common and made friends over when you first started talking, so she meant a lot to the both you. “We’ve got a private box. We’re right up near the front so we can see it all!” He said excitedly, “And we get to meet her beforehand, if you want.” He said and you set your phone down and shook your head in disbelief.

“This is extraordinarily thoughtful, H.” You said with a wide smile.

“Our first concert out in the open. No fear, no worries, just us.” He said and you hurried over to him and hugged him tight.

“This is honestly so amazing.” You sighed as you squeezed him tight and he kissed the top of your head. “I can’t wait to do this with you.” You said happily.

“Me either. It’s going to be so good.” He said with certainty and you nodded against his chest before pulling back and peering up at him.

“Can I kiss you?” You asked him and he chuckled.

“Always.” He hummed and you laughed and tip-toed a bit more and your lips met in a sweet and chaste kiss.

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” You gave him another kiss with each ‘thank you’ and he was a smiley and blushing mess before you. “My parents are going to die when they hear about this.”

“Well, part two…they’re coming as well.” He said and you pulled away.

“No.”

“Yeah!” He laughed happily and you shook your head.

“Harry.”

“I swear it. Your mum and dad, and my mum and her boyfriend. A proper date night. Though the meeting bit is just for us two.” He added and you were crying now, it seemed something ridiculous, but it was a full circle moment.

“This is so nice of you.” You whispered as you hugged him again.

“Hey, look at me, my love.” He hummed and you glanced up at him, “It’s not just a concert, you know? I want to do this with you and with our parents t-to also show them that it’s not just a for fun thing. This is about the future. Our future.” He said and you nodded. 

“Thank you.” You whispered, “I’m gonna kiss you for real now.” You said and he chuckled.

“Yeah, do it. Please.” He insisted and you chuckled.

Your lips were soon colliding gently and moving in an improvised but effortless dance together. You relaxed in his arms, you loved the warmth of his hands around your waist and then traveling down to your hips as he held you tight. It was a feat as challenging as the greek mythological quests trying to keep your composure around him. Everything just felt so easy and right when you were together, it always had. But now it was even stronger than before, you could feel the love emanating from him as you held each other and kissed passionately.

“Baby,” he mumbled, “can I…say something?” He asked and you nodded and pulled back from the kiss but he chased after you and kissed you deeply again before also keep the distance so he could speak properly. “I know we said no more jumping into things with people but you’re not just anyone, you know?” He said and you smiled a bit, “The love I have for you has been here the whole time. I’m not burying the hurt by wanting to be with you, it’s not like that with you, you know that.” He said and you nodded, “I want to be with you. I want to a relationship with you. I don’t want to wait anymore, I’ve already wasted so much time.” He said and you caressed his cheek with your thumb, “And I…I see the woman you’ve become. How you’ve grown and blossomed so beautifully-”

“You too!” You sniffled and he smiled.

“Thank you.” He chuckled, “But ummm…I don’t want to miss out on this. On you. It’s different with you, you know that.” He said, “Let’s do this again. Be my girlfriend, please?” He asked and you laughed happily and kissed him.

“Yeah. I will.” You whispered against his lips.

“You will what?” He asked with a grin and kissed you a few times, awaiting your response.

“I’ll be your girlfriend.” You said breathlessly with a smile. 

Harry was beaming and his hand came around the back of your neck, holding you gently as he dipped down and you kissed once again. He was slower this time, but the intensity was still at all time high. You felt your lust for him simmering steadily, nearly ready to bubble over into a boil with whatever move he’d make next. Your skin was tingling, excited to feel his touch once again.

“Can I take you to your room?” He asked, his lips gently smearing against your cheek as he spoke and then kissed you there.

“Yes.” You confirmed and he found your hand and led you through your house until you were bursting through the door and he was kissing you ardently as you walked backwards into the dim, cool room. His hands slid down your waist and landed over your backside, he caressed over it and gave your cheeks a light squeeze.

“I miss being able to do that.” He chuckled and you laughed a bit. You weren’t as thin as the people he had dated lately, so there was a little more to grab onto. You didn’t mind it, you were happy with yourself and you knew you were healthy, so you didn’t feel bad or find a need to even compare and it was relieving to you that he felt the same. “You’re exquisite. You know that right?” He asked and you smiled timidly at his compliment.

“How about you show me show exquisite you are first.” You suggested and he chuckled and was quick to take a step back and pull off his shirt, not even bothering with the buttons. 

Like a moth to a flame, you were right up against him again, kissing down his neck lightly. Trying not to smile too much as you traveled down to his pecs and the smattering of hair between them tickled your nose a little as you smooshed a kiss over his sternum. Your hands slid up his abs, you could feel his tummy flex a bit from the tickles your light touches were causing. You continued sliding it up until your index finger was hooking into the chain of his trusty pendant with the Jesus and penis charms. You tugged it down a bit before arching up into him and kissing him again. His hands slid up your back, his fingers feeling around for the pull on the zipper for your dress. 

“It’s on the right side.” You guided him and he was quick to take his hands there and slid it down. 

Harry helped the straps off of your shoulders, planting kisses on each shoulder blade before letting the dress drop down to the floor. You weren’t wearing a bra with it as the neckline was a bit strange, but he didn’t seem to mind that one bit. He groaned at the sight of your breasts bare before him and he immediately brought his hands up to them and kneaded them gently in his big, warm palms. You sighed in relief and glanced up at him and he seemed to have snapped. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you towards your bed. He sat and pulled you onto his lap in a straddling position and kissed you urgently. His tongue met yours sloppily before he started to kiss down your jaw, then your neck and finally he reached your chest. You arched your back in as he gently sucked on your collar bone and then skimmed his lips down to your right breast before parting them and latching around your nipple, effectively hardening it in a second. You moaned in relief as his blunt nails dug into your back as he started sucking more fervently.

“Yes! That’s so good.” You whimpered as he moaned around you. You peered down, looking at his gorgeously hollowed our cheeks as he sucked and nibbled at your tender little bud before popping off and moving to the other one. He payed it just as much attention, letting you whimper and whine as he went a little harder on you. Your fingers scratched against his scalp and you chuckled as he pulled back, nipple still in his mouth until it inevitably slipped out with a soft popping sound. He buried himself in the crook of your neck and inhaled and then exhaled, sounding relieved.

“I missed the scent of you and your perfume. I’d forgotten how good it is.” He said softly.

“I do too. Even had the same body wash you use for a while.” You said and he pulled away and smiled up at you.

“Yeah, baby?” You nodded.

“I’m never gonna forget again.” He told you with certainty and you smiled and caressed his cheek with the back of your hand. He leaned into your touch and let his eyes close for a moment.

“I’ve imagined this moment so many times.” You whispered and his eyes fluttered open and met yours. He smiled softly, peering up at you with so much love it made your insides flutter. 

“I have too.” He whispered back and kissed your lips quickly. “Hold on tight.” He said and you did and he stood and then had you on the bed as he laid over you.

He started to kiss down your body, you were already so wet for him, but knowing what was coming next practically had your legs trembling preemptively and your walls fluttering in excitement. He didn’t waste time or tease you at all, he needed this as badly as you needed it. He was quick to pull your underwear down your legs and toss it aside as he slid further down, parting your legs so that he could fit between them. He kissed down your mound and up your thighs before he nuzzled right up against your center, his stubble tickling your sensitive skin. You would normally want to be clean shaven if you knew someone was going down on you, just out of convenience, but you knew he didn’t care about that. He groaned happily at your scent and the softness of you against his lips as he puckered them up a bit and kissed at you a little bit, each time nuzzling a bit deeper until he brushed against your clit and you bit your lip in anticipation. 

“Fuck H, please. Please.” You begged and he let go of all the restraint he had inside of him and just let his tongue roll out as he spread your legs further so that he could lap up from your dripping entrance to your clit. He flicked over it a little bit before giving it heavier licks until you were pushing him closer and moaning in pleasure. Your hips were writhing up against his mouth and he moved with you, loving how you were losing yourself in this moment. He then started to gently suck around you as he sensed your growing need. You were soaking wet, making a right mess of his chin and you were obsessed with how he was using his mouth. He’s always been eager to please this was excellent. Clearly, he was well aware of what he could do now and it was amazing, “Fuck baby, that’s so good!” You gasped as he slurped on you until your legs were tensing up as your pleasure started to escalate further and further until they started to tremble. He was incessant, your chest almost burned from how shallow you were breathing, and in seconds you were inhaling sharply and moaning melodiously as your orgasm hit you. “Oh, I’m coming!” You mewled and held him against you as he licked you through it, mumbling about how good you tasted and how much he missed it. He didn’t even warn you when you felt his index finger rubbing at your sopping entrance.

“Can I?”

“Yeah, do it. Please.” You hummed and he gently pushed it inside. He moaned along with you, you were wet enough for another, so he pulled it out and then sunk back in along with his middle finger. His long fingers reached deep into you and rubbed against your walls, going deeper and deeper with each plunge until he had gone deep enough to reach into the soft spongy spot inside of you that had you crying out his name. He kissed up your stomach, waist, chest, and neck all to reach your lips again and breathe in your exhales of pleasure.

“Fuck baby, you’re so tight and warm f’me.” He hummed into your mouth and you nodded, “So good for me.” He muttered and you smiled against his lips. 

Your hands slid down his bare torso and reached down to feel his erection straining against his pants. You rubbed into it, using the heel of your palm to add a bit more pressure. His jaw tensed as he inhaled shakily through his nostrils. You started to rub at him in a matching pace to his fingers sinking into you. You wanted to feel him inside of you desperately. 

“Harry. Baby, I need you.” You whimpered and he nodded and kissed you hard before retreating from you. 

He got off of the bed and reached for his belt buckle, his desperation and eagerness coming through in the form of his shaky hands. He soon got it undone and pulled it out before getting to the button and zipper on them and he tugged them down along with his underwear. He stepped out of them and quickly climbed back over your naked body. Feeling your warmth together like this was something that he’d been thinking of constantly since he’d seen you the year before. He was eager to be close to you in this way and finally, he had it.

“I have condoms in the bathroom, but I also have an IUD.” You informed him and he licked over his lips as his eyes met yours.

“D-do you mind if I go bare? Want to feel you so bad, want to fill you up, want you to feel it all.” He said and you kissed him as you shook your head.

“I don’t mind.” You assured him.

“Sure?”

“Yeah.” You nodded and he kissed you once more, slower this time.

“I’ve only been waiting to have you again for…years?” He chuckled and you did too, “This might be over a little fast. But I assure you, I have far more in me. A couple rounds worth so-”

“It’s fine. Did you not see how fast I came?” You giggled.

“True.” He chuckled and tucked your hair behind your ear, “God, you’re so beautiful.” He complimented. His voice was soft and genuine and the love in his eyes made you feel faint. You leaned up and kissed him.

“I love you.” 

“I love you.” He whispered against your lips. Your kiss deepened and naturally, things started to progress. You pressed your body up into his, feeling his erection laying heavy between the two of you. You raised your hips up to feel it brushing up against your sticky folds and he sighed in relief at the slick warmth that his cock was up against now. “Fuck, put me inside, baby.” He said to you and you angled your up hips up a little bit more and guided him to your entranced. His thick tip prodded at your weepy, little hole, teasing at the entrance. You writhed around, trying to get him inside and he smiled, “That feels so nice.” He said and you smiled, “So wet for me, baby. All for me, isn’t it?”

“Yes, baby. S’all for you.” You confirmed through a needy exhale and he kissed you again and then propelled his weight further forward until there was enough pressure against you that he sunk inside and you gasped in relief as he moaned into your mouth. 

“Fuuuuck.” he moaned as he bottomed out and you whimpered as you felt so full. You swore he was in your lower tummy, he was bigger than you remembered. You recalled that he loved a little bite of pain, so when he wriggled a bit and sunk in a bit further you winced and dug your fingernails into his back. He made the most delicious sound, it made you feral and he started to thrust in slowly but achingly deep, it was making your thoughts completely blank. “You feel so good, baby. Fuck, you’re so good, my love.” He panted in pleasure.

You were covered in goosebumps, relishing in the feeling of intimacy with Harry. With the love of you life. Everything suddenly felt right with the world. Your back was arching because each and every time he was thrusting in, he was hitting a spot that made you feel like you would soon levitate. Your hands roamed the skin of his back, feeling his muscles working to bring you both all the pleasure in the world. It was the most harmonious sex of your life, you were both yearning to be closer than you already were. It was absolutely necessary to get closer. 

While still inside, he pinned your hips down with his and knelt up making you gasp in shock as he got even deeper like this. You suddenly felt strung out as he started to pick up his pace, his hips undulated and ground against yours in the most satisfying ways. You were encouraging him, praising him for how well he was fucking you. He was giving everything to you, you could feel it in his movements and in the rising temperature between the two of you. Damp skin and filthy wet sounds from the place where your bodies were connecting perfectly. You could feel your orgasm starting to build again so you slipped your hand between your bodies and started to rub precise circles into your clit and he moaned.

“Oh, that’s it, baby. Rub your little clit for me, want you come for me.” He encouraged you and you sped up a little more, “Look at me. Please, look at me.” He panted and your eyes slowly blinked open and met his. He smiled softly and pressed his forehead to yours, his gaze burning into you, making you feel like the only other person in the world. “Fuck, it feels so good with you. You feel so good.” He groaned and you whimpered as you started to reach the peak.

“I’m so close, baby!” You warned and he nodded.

“Come for me, love. Let me feel you coming so hard on my cock.” He egged you on and you suddenly felt warm all over as you started to come undone. Everything inside of you was singing beautifully. You felt like you were burning bright, like a dying star, you were crashing and burning, it was a spectacle to behold. “That’s it, baby. That’s so fucking good, fuck you feel so good, love.” He praised you with a smile, “S’gonna make me come…fuck, you’re gonna make me come.” He grunted.

“Yes, baby. Please come inside me. Please give it to me.” You begged as your orgasm continued thanks to his fast and desperate thrusting into you. His eyes blinked shut and his eyebrows furrowed down as his lips fell open and he let out a low moan, “Oh fuck. Fuck, m’gonna fill up your little pussy. Fuck! Oh fuck, Y/n…fuck yeah, baby.” He sighed and then buried himself as deep as he could go and you gasped as you felt his cock twitching inside of you as he painted your insides with his generous load of cum. He was still for a few seconds before grabbing your hair and tugging you up so that he could kiss you. Your lips met sloppily as he started to thrust gently into you. Your abs were burning and your legs were shaking as he continued fucking into you slow, milking every drop of his sperm into you. “I love you. Loveyousomuch.” He slurred against your mouth.

After a few moments you had both settled down, trying your best to catch your breaths as you basked in the warmth, holding each other close. Your fingers scratched at his scalp gently, it felt so nice and relaxing. His lips were kissing at the part of your skin that they could reach while he held you close.

“I’m never letting you go again.” He whispered.

“Good.” You hummed and he smiled.

“This is where I belong. I feel safe with you. I feel seen. I feel…”

“Whole?” You whispered and he nodded.

“Yeah, you make me feel satisfied with myself.” He said and you smiled.

“You make me feel whole too. I love you.”

“I love you.” He hummed, “Forever.” He added with a smile.

.... THE END ....

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[mistydeyes]

Hi! Im totally in love with your fics and I was wondering if you could do a Ghost x Fem Reader and It would be him discovering that the reader has some sort of fire powers? I've had Borderlands brainrot for a while now and I've always wanted to know how he'd react to the reader having Phasewalking abilities or something 😭 If its a little too complicated I'll understand!

Again, love your work!

OMG Y E S this is such a good request!! like i've never read anything like this so i hope I did it justice! and fr borderlands is such a fun game, i wanna be a siren so bad haha

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summary: Fire was always beautiful to you. Despite the destruction it caused a forest, it allowed for growth and new life. It somehow found you throughout life but now your hidden ability to control it is tested when you and Simon are put in a dangerous situation.

pairing: simon "ghost" riley x fem!reader

warnings: swearing, descriptions of violence/fire

a/n: okay let's pretend that it's not an immediate red flag and threat of death to have powers and ghost doesn't call the authorities on your ass

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You never planned to reveal your inhuman talents to Simon. Even as a child, your parents warned you of the dangers of starting fires with your fingertips and would often gift you gloves lined with fire-retardant material. You had gone through your adult life with relative normalcy but dating Simon had been accompanied by a few close calls. From him almost catching you lighting a candle to you secretly diverting a growing flame away from the uncontrollable campfire, you held your breath and prayed he was blind to the event. You were resolved to using your powers to keep you safe (and to help with the occasional candle or stove for convenience's sake) but now you were being put to the test.

Your eyes and nose stung as Simon shook you awake. The room felt hot and you struggled to breathe in the smoggy air. "We have to get out of here," he yelled, trying to suppress a cough. You looked around and saw the bedroom door beginning to be engulfed by the sickly crackle of golden flames. "What's happening?" you asked as he pulled you close to the ground. "Not sure, I think the whole row is on fire," he weakly said, pulling you closer to the window. You bit your tongue as you continued slowly. Internally, you rationalized suppressing your powers as you knew a fire escape was on the other side of the window pane. "Just climb down," Simon directed, hoisting the window open but he swore upon looking down. "Fuck," he cursed lowly and you poked your head over to see the collapsed metal of the ladder on the ground.

He pulled you back on the ground as his mind raced with possibilities of escape. The room's temperature was building and you could see the semblance of scarlet and orange flames break through the door and heat the wall. Your mind was clouded as you debated on the quandary that was your current situation. "Simon," you whispered, holding his face in your hands, "follow me." Before he could object, you pulled on his wrist and began to make your way to the door. He tried to hold you back, screaming obscenities about your crazed attitude. You silenced him by moving the fire away through the door and decreasing the heat of the glowing red door knob. "Did-did you just-" Simon began to say and you responded by yanking the door open.

"I'll explain later," you continued and placed him behind you. He held his disbelief as he watched you move the vibrant flames and put them out with a small brush of your hand. It was as if fire bowed to your command and Simon tried to rationalize your actions. You eventually reached the entrance of the flat which was blocked by a wall of fire and ash. You closed your eyes, manipulating the surrounding heat and allowing you to run out. As the fire and rescue services rushed to your aid and placed you in an ambulance, you couldn't help but notice the nondescript look on Simon's face. "I'll tell you later," you mouthed to him, before closing your fist and sitting down for your medical examination.

#task force 141 x reader #task force 141 #cod x reader #call of duty modern warfare #cod mwii #modern warfare 2 #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #call of duty #mw2 imagine #madebyizzie #mw2 #izzie is writing

[mrsshabana]

How would pet!au gyu react to accidently biting his (nice) owner/owner in DD? Maybe he was sleeping and got touched without warning so bit out of instinct. Or bit out of an unfortunate misunderstanding- One time my dog had a mosquito sitting on her thigh and I went to brush it off but it bit her as I reached over and she thought that I had pinched her so she turned and bit me and I felt sooo bad for her haha

𝑮𝒚𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒐 𝒂𝒄𝒄𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒃𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 ( 𝑷𝒆𝒕 𝒂𝒖 )

♡ CW: female!reader, blood, ptsd, abuse, self harm

Gyutaro had fallen asleep on the couch, in the middle of the day again. You have errands to run, so you'll have to wake him up to tell him you're leaving so he doesn't freak out when he sees you're gone.

"Gyutaro," you whisper, gently nudging his shoulder.

It happened so fast. His eyes shot open, he whipped his face around, and bit your hand. He didn't realize what had happened until he tasted your blood filling his mouth. The guilt hit him almost instantly.

He bit you out of instinct. He's so used to being in abusive homes and having to endure constant beatings. He isn't used to human touch being a gentle, loving thing. When he felt your touch startle him awake, his body went into defensive mode.

"Shit," you mumble, holding your bloodied hand.

"M'sorry! M'so sorry!" he spews apologies. Springing up from his spot on the couch to run over to you. He feels so bad. After all the kindness you've shown him, he repays you by hurting you.

"It's ok Gyutaro, I'm fine," you say as you make your way to the bathroom, Gyutaro following close behind.

The bite isn't too bad, it's just bleeding a lot. Once you clean it and wrap it in some gauze it's ok. Just a bit sore.

Gyutaro sits on the bathroom floor, with his head down, "M'sorry Miss Y/N. I didn't mean to..." He shakes, awaiting his punishment. He's deserved a beating numerous times and you have never given him one. But he's certain that this time, you won't be so forgiving.

Having seen him do this plenty of times, it still breaks your heart knowing that he expects you to hit him. "Gyutaro, I'm not mad at you. It's ok honey," you gently pet him, "It's my fault for startling you."

He shakes his head, "No! Not your fault... my fault. My fault for being bad." His fists clench and he begins to tremble. Not out of fear, but out of anger. He didn't think he could hate himself any more, but in this moment he somehow does.

Kneeling down beside him, you embrace him in a hug. "It isn't your fault, and I'm not mad at you. Ok? You're a good boy Gyutaro."

Calling him a good boy always makes him feel better, no matter the situation. With a whimper he gently caresses your injured hand and rubs it against his cheek.

"You're so sweet," you giggle, ruffling his hair, "I was going to tell you I'm going to run some errands. But I think I'd like you to come with me."

You usually don't take Gyutaro out with you, as being around other humans makes him nervous. But you fear that if you leave him alone he may try to hurt himself. In the past, when you haven't punished him, he took it upon himself.

He's silent for a moment before responding, "Ok..." he cracks a small smile.

You can't help but grin, seeing that he is feeling a little bit better. "Alright then, let's go get your shoes on and we can go." Today it will be your mission to spoil him and make him smile.

Tysm for this question, it was a really creative thing to think about in this au. I had a lot of fun writing it too! I love answering questions about the pet au! (´｡• ᵕ •｡`)

#gyutaro x reader #gyutaro x y/n #pet au #gyutaro #gyutaro shabana #replies

[michwritesstuff]

Dating Bradley Bradshaw (Top Gun: Maverick)

a/n: omg does this song not scream being loved by bradley bradshaw! haha i am not doing well but this headcanon is saving me, so hope you all enjoy!

summary: female reader (she/her) x bradley bradshaw ughh I just want to date this man so badly! I know he would take such good care of his girlfriend! enjoy my ideas of what I think it would be like to date Bradley Bradshaw :)

notes/warnings: sexual activity mentioned at the end (18+)

word count: 1.3k+

You had first met Bradley during his first time around at Top Gun.

As attractive as you found him, growing up near North Island you knew that military men were off limits! They never stuck around long enough for anything serious, and you weren’t the type to mess around.

But Bradley was different. From the beginning he was genuine and caring, with the ability of holding an intellectual conversation, a trait that you appreciated.

You quickly became close friends and kept contact after he graduated from Top Gun and was shipped overseas.

He would send handwritten letters and a picture to keep you updated.

When Bradley got called back to Top Gun you reunited, but not without him making a surprise out of it. He had Penny call you into the Hard Deck to pick up something for your parents, running up and grabbing you from behind as you face the bar.

You reacted like any rational person would react, instantly dropping your weight and elbowing your attacker until their grip loosened.

“Ow, shit!”

You turned around immediately, recognizing his voice.

“Bradshaw, what the fuck?” the initial shock quickly replaced with excitement as you threw yourself into his embrace.

“What are you doing here?”

“Had to surprise my best girl!”

Your heart fluttered at his admission “his girl”

Since his return, every time they weren’t busy with training and worrying about the mission the Dagger Squad would come over to your house to hang out. It was your way of reminding them that they were regular people and deserved to have fun!

The night before they shipped out, Bradley had showed up at your doorstep at 10:30pm

“Rooster, what are you doing here, you should be sleeping?”

“I couldn’t. I started thinking too much and I just I—” he trailed off.

You invited him in, making tea for the both of you as he sat on your couch.

As you sat down next to him, turning so that you were facing each other you freezed as he grabbed your hand.

“What’s going on Rooster?”

“Y/N, I just—I can’t leave tomorrow without getting this off my chest.”

“Bradley—”

“Y/N, I love you. You are the kindest and most considerate human being that I have ever met. You are always there for me whenever I need you to be and you are incredibly genuine and selfless. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone like you.”

You didn’t respond, shocked and in awe of his confession.

“Say something darling, I’m drowning here” he laughed, attempting to lighten the mood.

One hand cupped his cheek as the other snaked around to is neck, pulling him in so that his lips hovered over yours.

“I love you too Bradley”

You were met with the warmest and most electrifying kiss of your life. Like the ones in the movies where time freezes and fireworks explode.

“You better come back to me,” you whispered as you both pulled away.

“Always,” Bradley responded, leaning his forward head against yours before giving your lips a quick peck.

And come back to you he did.

After the Uranium mission you and Bradley had made your relationship official. You didn’t make it a big deal, but you had really felt it when he reintroduced you to the team as his girlfriend.

If Bradley thought he loved you before, then he was a complete stranger to this new feeling of being in a relationship with you.

You had become so close with the team, which was something Bradley was extremely thankful for. You were constantly hanging out with Phoenix and inviting the team over for dinner, in addition to the late nights at the Hard Deck.

You would spend forever picking out the perfect outfit and making sure your makeup looked right before walking into your and Bradley’s shared bedroom.

“Wow, I truly am the luckiest man alive,” Bradley stated from where he sat on the edge of the bed.

Walking to where he sat you would stand in between his legs, lifting his chin with your fingers before leaning down to plant a kiss on his lips.

“And don’t you forget it.”

Bradley would get a little jealous sometimes, wishing that you would just slow down and spend time alone with him. And you did.

As much as you loved going out and drunkenly dancing with everyone you couldn’t wait for the weekends where you and Bradley would cuddle up on the couch and catch up on the episodes of whatever new show you were binging.

Exhausted from the week, Bradley would kiss your temple before picking you and carrying you to the bedroom.

Bradley was your biggest supporter and vice versa, you were so incredibly proud of him and everything that he had accomplished in his career.

Although his relationship had improved greatly with Maverick, Bradley was still lacking in the family department. Luckily, you had a large and loving family nearby.

Bradley’s favorite thing was when you both got to babysit your baby nieces and nephews. He couldn’t wait until they would officially be his niece’s and nephews as well.

In fact, he couldn’t wait until the two of you had your own kids running around.

──── ⋆⋅Bradley and Yours Sex Life⋅⋆ ────

The first time you and Bradley has slept together was when he had come back from the Uranium mission. It was neither of yours’s first time but there was something special to him of almost dying and choosing to share this moment with you.

It was pure love making; soft, gentle, and deep. He wanted to show you just how much he loved and cared about you, taking care of you fully.

It wasn’t that often that you and Bradley took things slow, it wasn’t rare. But, you both had a high sex drive and loved to have fun with it.

Constantly changing up positions and locations to mix it up.

 The amount of handjobs and blowjobs you had given him in the Hard Deck bathroom was unreal, but all it took was a little bit of tequila for one of you to get needy and the other instantly giving in.

His favorite—oh god, his absolute favorite was when you rode him in the driver seat of his Bronco.

That wouldn’t have even been the purpose of the drive, you would drive down the coast and he would pull into a small overlook and park, sitting and talking before things got heated.

“Such a good girl, fucking yourself on my cock.”

You would just whine and pull on his hair. He was vocal, and you loved it, and he expected the same from you.

“Isn’t that right princess?”

“Yes”

“Yes what?”

“Ye—fuck I…yes Rooster”

He slapped your ass, the hand that was guiding your hips raising til he placed a firm pressure on your throat.

“Not quite,” he stated, looking at you expectantly.

“Yes, Daddy! It feels so good when I fuck myself on your cock.”

“There we go,” he gritted, smiling as he thrusted up into you to meet the rhythm of your hips.

“Fuck, so deep Roo—filling me up,” you panted.

“God, you’re perfect. Just so pretty and tight, wrapped around me.”

There was something Rooster loved about being called Daddy, the thought of getting you pregnant with his child sent him over the edge.

He was already halfway there, being on birth control the two of you had given up condoms a while ago.

You loved when he fucked you raw, feeling every ridge of his cock rub against you.

Bradley was a generous lover, he loved going down on you and edging you with his mouth and fingers for hours.

But, like every man. He would get jealous and fuck you senseless, basically just using your body to remind you who you belonged too.

Holding your hair in a makeshift ponytail as you were on your knees bracing your hands on his thighs.

His hips thrusting erratically as he fucked himself with your mouth, moaning when his tip hit the back of your throat. You would swallow around him and your eyes would begin to well up.

“What was that darling?” he teased.

“Kind of hard to speak with my cock in your mouth huh? Maybe next time we wont be so friendly with Hangman and Coyote…”

check out the rest of my work ⤑ here!

#teentvimagines #top gun #top gun maverick #top gun masterlist #top gun maverick masterlist #top gun imagine #top gun maverick imagine #top gun rooster #bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x you #bradley bradshaw x y/n #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster x y/n #rooster x you #rooster x reader #rooster x female reader #bradley rooster x you #bradley rooster x y/n #bradley rooster x reader #bradley bradshaw smut #rooster smut #Spotify

[yukina-otome]

Pregnancy scare headcannons

Hello everyone! Here is part 1 of my pregnancy scare headcannons this time with Chevalier and Clavis. Feel free to request the other princes in the comments!

---------------------------------

It was during a time MC and her prince were not even engaged.

MC was pacing around in her room, her period was late, very late. Almost 3 weeks late to be precise. 

This had happened before, but it was never more than a week or so. This time, she could really be pregnant.

Well, she had been pretty stressed lately and she knew that her period often responded to stress by being late.

But they have been going at it like bunnies this past month so it wasn’t impossible for her to be pregnant.

The worst is that she had no way to know for sure until around 2 months of pregnancy and right now she could be 1 month pregnant so she’d have to wait one whole month for the midwife to be able to diagnose her.

All she could hope for is for her period to come.

She felt panic submerge her more every second that passed, until she heard the door to her room open.

Chevalier Michel

Chevalier knew all of MC’s little habits by heart. He knew she was late, very late. But he did not worry at all.

This has happened before, never that much but even if she was pregnant, it would not be a big deal.

He was nothing like his father who could not protect his belle. He knew he could guarantee her safety and the safety of their child.

He expected her to be worried about this, so when he did not find her in their usual meeting spot, his library, he knew she would be in her room.

He opened the door to find her in the middle of a panic attack.

She barely noticed him coming in, and he quickly walked to her and grabbed her arm in a gesture that he wanted to be reassuring but came out a bit aggressive and awkward.

“What’s wrong?” he asked her even though he knew very well what was happening. He wanted to give her a chance for her to tell him herself.

She looked away. She didn’t know how he would react to this news.

“Even if you were pregnant, it would not be a problem.”

She looked up at him in surprise. As always, he was able to read her like a book.

“How would it not be a problem! Do you not remember what happened to the previous belle. I have no status to protect me or the hypothetical baby! What if-”

He quickly cut her off before she went deeper in her hypothesis.

“Do you compare me to that pathetic excuse of a father? Are you underestimating my abilities to protect you and our child?”

‘Our child’ saying it felt strangely good, he did not dislike the idea, it’s just that the timing wasn’t ideal.

And he saw it in her eyes, she did not dislike the thought of it either.

She started calming down and he wrapped his arms around her.

She never felt as safe as she did when he hugged her. She closed her eyes, feeling all the stress melt.

And indeed, few days later her period arrived. She was relieved and he simply smiled at her when she told him the news.

He knew he would want a child between them someday, but it was not the time yet.

For now, all he needed was her.

Clavis Lelouch

NB: We know that canonically this scenario is not possible for Clavis but let’s pretend it is.

Clavis knew he wanted as many children with his lover as possible, he did not care for the when and where.

As long as MC wanted this, he did not care.

As he did almost every day now, Clavis barged into his lover’s room without much of a knock.

She usually scolded him for that but today she looked at him in both surprise and panic.

His usual shady smile quickly disappeared as he rushed to her.

“What’s wrong?”

She felt tears coming to her eyes and he hugged her tightly.

He had no idea what or who did this to her but whoever it was, he would make them pay.

She cried for a while, and he just hugged her until she finally calmed down enough to be able to tell him what’s wrong.

“Wait, that’s it? That’s what made you into this state? haha!”

He laughed more in relief than anything else.

“Clavis! This is a big problem! What if I really am pregnant!”

“Then me and you would become parents! I can already see myself with an army of little clavis playing pranks on the whoooole caste!”

MC was relieved to see him so enthusiastic and she couldn't help but smile weakly.

“Or….Is that not something you want?” clavis had a serious expression on his face. If she never wanted to have babies he would not mind at all. The most important thing for him was her happiness.

“I want it too! But not now! It’s too early! Right now whatever kid we have would be illegitimate. I don’t have the power nor the status to protect it and-”

“So that’s the problem!? If so then let's hold our engagement tomorrow and our wedding after tomorrow! With that, you’ll be officially my princess! I’ll talk to Cyran right away and-”

“Wait! No! That’s not what I want! I want you to marry me cause you want it not because I’m pregnant! Plus right now I might not be pregnant at all so let’s wait for confirmation!”

She tried to calm down her lover, knowing very well that he could go through with the idea.

“But I do want to marry you! The baby is just the perfect excuse!”

“That’s not the point and you know it! Let’s just wait, please.” She gave him her best puppy eyes and he could never say no to her anyways.

Regardless, few days later, MC’s period came, much to her relief and when she told Clavis, he felt disappointed but also a bit relieved.

The truth is that he was worried that he would not be good enough to be a father. He was not the strongest, or the smartest. But this whole situation gave him a new insight on his future with MC.

He needed to become stronger and better and more confident in himself, in order to be the best father and husband ever!

#ikemen prince #ikepri #ikeprince #chevalier michel #ikemen ouji chevalier #cheva #ikepri chevalier #ikemen prince chevalier #ikeprince chevalier #ikeprince clavis #ikepri clavis #clavis lelouch

[bakersgrief]

A/n: FUCK this took me forever. Uuuuh I really don't love it but I hope I can feed a few Silvio simps.

WARNINGS: explicit content, collaring, leash play, puppy play, master kink, degradation, orgasm denial, swearing, face stepping, oral (reader recieving), fem reader, no beta we die like the king

.

.

.

"The fuck is this...?" The last thing Silvio was expecting was to find a collar around his neck when you planted yourself on his lap, quickly fastening it before he had the chance to react. It was a simple leather affair with a metal clasp, quite unlike the finery he typically adorned himself with. It was fitting that he was dressed down as well, resembling the haughty puppy he was more than a powerful prince. Perhaps you had spoiled him a bit too much with your affections to have him sprawled across the sofa like he owned the place. What a naughty thing he was.

Your lips curled up in a smirk, barely deterred by his confused protest. What a disobedient dog. "Hmm? Don't you like it, puppy?"

"The hell-" Click. A leash. Silvio was indignant. You not only collared him, but put a leash on him as well? And both were plain as hell. What were you thinking, trying to put a prince like him in such boring attire?Well, maybe not completely boring. It was... just the littlest bit exciting. Not that he would ever tell you that. You pushed yourself off his lap and stood in front of him, winding the lead around your hand and responding calmly to his challenging glare.

"I'm afraid it was a necessity. After all, you know dogs aren't allowed on the furniture."

"Huh? Hrgk-!" Silvio was yanked off the sofa with surprising force, landing on his knees in front of you. Of course, you were careful not to hurt him. The human neck was delicate, after all. His baleful gaze suggested he hadn't just let you bodily yank him off the couch, as though he was kneeling at your feet and looking up at you expectantly entirely against his will. As though his racing heart and twitching cock was due to anger rather than sudden arousal.

"...The hell do ya think you're doing?" His voice came out as growl that would have been threatening; were he not getting hard just from being on his knees while you towered over him.

"My, my." You tutted in mock disappointment. "What noisy barking, puppy. Do I need to muzzle you as well?"

"Ngh-" Silvio grunted as you grabbed him by the hair, yanking his head back to get a better look at his slowly forming blush.

You murmed in a sultry voice, mere inches from his face. "It would be in your best interest to behave, puppy. Surely you know... only good boys get to cum."

Silvio felt his cock throb at your words.

"...oh yeah? And why should I listen to you?"

The heat burning inside of him flared as your eyes became cold and sharp.

"Why...?" You pretended to ponder the question as you moved to sit in the center of the sofa Silvio had previously occupied. You slowly pulled the leash in your hand taut, before yanking him around so he was kneeling between your legs.

You pushed his shoulders down and planted your foot on his face, earning another growl from him.

"This is your place, puppy." You whispered sweetly. "At your master's feet."

You stepped off him and pulled his face to your clothed core. Silvio couldn't help but lean in just a bit, inhaling the scent of your arousal.

"Now, puppy." You whispered again. "Make good use of that noisy mouth of yours."

You slowly pressed his face against your clothed sex, hearing his breath hitch.

"Haha, it's your favorite treat, isn't it?" You cooed, gently rocking your hips against his face.

Silvio glared at you, but didn't try to pull away, obediently mouthing at your damp undergarments. You smiled, pleased with his compliance. He slowly raised a hand, hooking his finger in your panties and pulling them to the side so he could begin licking long stripes up your sweet pussy.

Your sighs of pleasure rang out as you stroked Silvio's hair, encouraging him.

"What a good boy. If you do a really good job, I might just let you come inside me."

Silvio shuddered and began to lap at your leaking hole more enthusiastically. You grinned in delight.

"Does my puppy like that? You wanna spill your seed in your master's pretty cunt? You want me all warm and full of your love when I'm done having my way with you?"

Silvio let out a sound somewhere between a growl and a whine, causing your head to fall back as it reverberated through your pussy. The sounds of his wet lapping and your pleased hums mingled in the air.

"Such a dirty boy." You panted. "Nothing but a bitch in heat. Devouring your master's cunt just for a chance to come inside her."

Silvio whined, painfully hard. You chuckled mockingly.

"Keep licking, puppy. I'm not letting YOU cum until you beg me with a face covered in MY cum."

Silvio shivered, precum staining the front of his pants as his cock grew impossibly harder in anticipation for the long night ahead.

#ikemen prince #ikemen series #ikepri #silvio ricci #ikepri fanfiction #ikepri silvio #ikepri smut #ikemen prince fanfiction #ikemen prince smut

[readyplayerhobi]

Because, I Love You | 01

; Jungkook x Older!Reader

; Genre: Fluff, slight angst, mentions of smut

; Word Count: 4.3k

; Warnings: Allusions to fatphobia, insecure thoughts from MC but Jungkook is just so sweet about it

; Synopsis: According to society, Jeon Jungkook should not be with you. He should be with a younger, hotter and thinner girl instead of wasting his time on you. It’s a good thing Jungkook doesn’t care what society thinks then.

; A/N: Got the random inspo for this and some of you said to write it, so I did...in a few hours haha. Who knows if this is good or not? I hope you enjoy a Jungkook who’s happy and in love, that’s all I wanted for this lol It was just something nice to write out...got the creative juices flowing!

; Masterlist

-

You had never imagined that you’d end up dating someone like Jeon Jungkook. There were too many things that weren’t in your favour when it came to someone like him, too many points in the negative column. Or so you’d thought.

You were older than him, by six years. Even though you’d both been well into adulthood when you’d started a relationship, it still got awkward reactions from people when they found out. Men were allowed to be older than women and it not be viewed as odd, but having the woman be older seemed to be too much for some people to accept.

He was exceptionally in shape, as in he went to the gym every other day and engaged in other physical activities on the other days. Jungkook loved to box or swim, and sometimes he’d even go running if he was bored. Meanwhile, you were pretty sure that you were allergic to the gym and liked to think of yourself politely as ‘curvy’. Your belly wasn’t flat or toned and your hips had a little more fat on them than people like, though you would always support the body positivity movement.

It wasn’t that you ate a lot, or were lazy or anything. You just didn’t see the need to personally limit your food or force yourself to go into a gym and do things you don’t like. Instead, you liked to take long walks and go exploring at your own pace whilst your home-cooked meals were easily one of Jungkook’s favourite things in the world. 

If you spent too long looking at Instagram or any news sites, then you knew that by the laws of social media, Jungkook should not be with you. He was a ridiculously attractive, super fit young guy with a good job and a great personality. TikTok would throw a fit to see him with you, just like they did with that other couple where the girl wasn’t as ‘conventionally attractive’.

And yet, Jungkook was the one who’d pursued you.

He was the one who’d matched with you on the dating app, and he’d been the one to send the first message. You’d been convinced he was just doing it for a laugh, you’d had far too many incidents on datings apps where guys seemed to react to you in two ways; either wanting sex immediately or wanting to try and run you off the app for daring to not fit their idea of a beautiful woman.

The number of insults you’d experienced had meant that by the time Jungkook had sent a message, you’d become tired of the whole thing. You’d even ignored him at first, only responding when he’d sent a sad face emoji. To this day, you don’t understand how he’d manage to get you in his results as he was below the age range you’d specified, but he had and he’d been determined.

You weren’t the best texter, so the conversation had been a little stilted as you’d tried to suss him out. Was he just looking for a quick lay, thinking that you’d be desperate? Or was he wanting the prestige of banging an older woman? Was he one of those guys who had a weird kink about women on the heavier side? Or was he one of the guys who felt the need to shame you about your weight and existence?

Although you ate healthily and did your frequent walks, people often assumed things about you. And as much as you hated to admit it now, Jungkook had looked exactly like the kind of guy who would send those mean messages.

Young, insanely attractive and aware of it, tattooed and pierced. He was like a god comes to life, and some men like that had the matching god complex to go with it.

But Jeon Jungkook had not been like that. He’d happily talked to you about whatever you’d suggested and you’d realised he was a giant nerd underneath the hard exterior. After a month of casual texting, he hadn’t once said anything negative to you but he had discussed extensively why Fantastic Four deserved a redemption arc in the MCU and you’d become weirdly knowledgeable about boxing because of him.

You’d found out he had a dog, a Dobermann called Bam who had an undocked tail and floppy ears that hadn’t been clipped. When you’d noted that, he’d told you that he’d looked it up and had cried when he’d found out what happened to dogs to get that look.

This led to the other thing about Jungkook, he was sentimental as fuck. Despite being six years younger than you, he seemed to have such a wise head on his shoulders at times and he always took things a little too seriously. You still remembered when he’d messaged you in distress, only for it to turn out that he’d accidentally killed a bumblebee.

“But they’re vital for the environment, and I killed it!” He’d lamented over the phone to you, his deep voice filled with genuine upset and regret. You’d consoled him, even if you’d been thoroughly amused, and had realised he was entirely serious when he’d sent you a photo of the tiny bee grave he’d sent later that day. He’d even made a little gravestone and everything.

It had been that moment, around a solid month and a half since you’d started talking, that you finally let your heart open up a little to him. Cautiously accepted that a man who gave a funeral for a bee probably wasn’t going to hurt you, at least not on purpose. Of course, you couldn’t predict the future but you’d decided to try.

He’d been subtly asking you for dates the whole time, casually dropping hints about a new movie coming out or a restaurant he’d heard that was good. You’d rebuffed him every time, the prospect of seeing him in person making panic flood your veins until you felt ill. Talking over text or the phone was fine, he couldn’t see you. People liked to talk to you, but dating was always a minefield.

Would it be easier for him to realise that your pictures weren’t lying about your body, or would he consider you uglier in person? You weren’t a make-up person, it always made your skin breakout and you’d get the worst headaches sometimes, so your profile only had one or two with make-up on. There were also plenty of photos of your whole body, as you refused to lie about yourself.

What they saw on your profile, was what they’d get.

But you’d finally relented and agreed to go to the movies with him to see the latest in an animated film series. It had been you to suggest it, as it was one of your favourite series ever, but then you’d felt stupid turning up to the theatre and realising there were loads of kids there. You hadn’t had much time to think about it though, as Jungkook had suddenly appeared in front of you with the same sweet smile in his photos.

He’d thought it was hilarious when you’d apologised, mumbling out that you hoped he didn’t think you thought of him as some kid just because he was younger. It had plagued your mind through the whole film that he’d take offence, or realise that you were older than he’d like. Even though you’d mentioned many times the age difference.

Yet he’d just been excited about the film when you’d come out of it, laughing at how you’d both been the only adults there without kids and the only people on a date. You’d gone for pizza afterwards, you shyly trying to hide your body from him as you got to properly take him in without the darkness of a cinema screen to cover for you. He had been just as astonishingly attractive in person with his biceps as large and muscular as his pictures. 

Jungkook had been unbelievably polite though, not once letting his eyes linger somewhere and he’d even complimented you a few times. You’d narrowed your eyes at him, wondering whether he was lying given you hadn’t worn make-up just like you’d warned him and he’d laughed yet again. He had a sweet laugh, one that you imagined he’d probably been a little embarrassed by when he was younger because it was loud but it made you laugh just as much.

He’d been a gentleman at the end too, kissing your cheek shyly after he’d walked you to your car. Despite how well it had gone, you’d fully expected him to ghost you after seeing what you were like in person. It had happened before.

Instead, he’d messaged you almost as soon as he’d got home, completely disregarding the fact that he might come across as overeager. He’d complimented you again, thanked you for going on a date with him and let you know that he’d enjoyed himself. Not only that, but he’d asked you on another date.

And then another, and then another.

It had taken six dates before he asked you to be his girlfriend. You’d been shocked, even though the dates had been going well, and questioned if he wanted that. If he wanted to date someone like you. He’d given you an odd look then, his nose wrinkling in confusion.

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t?” That was all he’d said in response, the words simple and said clearly. Like he couldn’t understand why you’d think he wouldn’t want to date you. It had been mind-blowing for you to realise that he genuinely wanted you and all the negative thoughts you had about yourself were only in your head. To him, you were exactly what he was looking for and he wasn’t going to let the chance go.

So you’d shyly said yes, uncertain as to whether this was going to last long or if he’d get tired or bored and move onto a younger, prettier model.

That had been six years ago.

Now you were thirty-six years old to his thirty, but you had more similarities than differences. He was still unbelievably hot, he was even more attractive than he had been. Jeon Jungkook was one of those annoying men who got more beautiful as he aged. He was still more in shape than you and all those things that people frowned upon.

But you now shared the same last name as him, wore the ring he’d given you to propose with and the ring he’d given you on your wedding day proudly and carried his first child. Jungkook had never once made you feel bad about yourself or unattractive, if anything he’d always been relentless in his desire for you.

That had only increased since you’d gotten pregnant, your belly now swelling from the baby that grew inside you. You swore you were giving off some kind of pheromone or something because Jungkook had been hornier than ever over the last few months. And that was saying something because he’d always had a very healthy sexual appetite.

The first time you’d had sex had been two months after you’d started dating. Despite his assurances that he found you attractive, you’d been shy and hesitant. That had disappeared during the act itself when he’d practically devoured your pussy and left you a shivering wreck before giving you the best sex you’d ever had. Which was saying a lot, given it had been your first time with him.

But he’d just been so attentive and caring, and he’d known exactly how to use his mouth, his fingers and his dick. You’d felt like you were being worshipped with how he’d mouthed hot kisses all over your body, even the bits you disliked, and his hands wouldn’t stop roaming your body desperately. As much as you’d been turned on by him, he’d been equally turned on by you.

It hadn’t stopped either. The flames of passion had quieted down, becoming a mellow flame that was constant warmth and comfort instead of sparks and explosions. Sometimes the sex was quick, sometimes it was slow, sometimes it was filled with whispers of love and adoration and sometimes it was just growls and grunts.

He’d never made you feel uncomfortable though, always made it clear that he was turned on by you. That he loved you deeply, even through all your insecurities and self-doubt. He’d offered some of his own to you to try and level the field, noting how he felt a little insecure sometimes that he hadn’t achieved as much as you had or that he didn’t earn as much. That he felt you’d got your life together a lot better than him.

That he thought you’d have judged him as some kind of player from the start and ignored him. Or just thought he was some stupid young guy and refused to give him the time of day or find him childish. It had been a quiet revelation for you to realise that he’d been just as nervous and worried.

You would forever be thankful that Jungkook kept at it, that he’d pursued you and refused to back down from a challenge. That he’d helped you learn to love yourself and your life a little more, along with bringing so much joy and laughter. He sometimes did stupid things that had you staring at him in confusion, and sometimes he didn’t know the references you made.

But he made up for it in the way he threw himself into learning your hobbies and interests, helping you to garden and turn your yard into a paradise for plants. He’d read so many of the books that you had, just so you had someone to discuss the plots with and he patiently listened to you ramble on about horror films despite the fact he hated them.

In turn, you watched his romance films with him and didn’t tease him too much when he cried at them and you’d learnt all the facts about his favourite boxers, had even gone to a match with him. You’d supported him when he’d applied for his dream job in a career he wasn’t in, consoling him when he’d been denied and then celebrating when he’d gotten it.

Sure, you had arguments with him sometimes and you’d get a little grumpy with him, but you knew that at the end of the day, you were perfect for each other.

“Whatcha thinking ‘bout?” The man in question asks, sitting down lightly on the swinging bench he’d installed in the backyard last year. You’d both redone the whole yard, repainting the fence and creating a whole new wildflower section alongside adding a fully functioning pond with koi fish in it. He’d seen the bench in a DIY store and had bought it, with your agreement, before spending a whole afternoon assembling it with your help.

It hadn’t been any trouble to you, not when you got to watch your hot husband getting all sweaty whilst shirtless.

Looking over at him, you chew on your lips for a moment before shrugging lightly and smiling. You’re sitting cross-legged on the bench, unbelievably comfy thanks to the cushions he’d added. Jungkook thought one of the most important principles in life was being comfortable, which meant your home was full of cushions and soft things.

“You, me, us. I dunno, I just…I saw this thing earlier about a couple where the guy was super hot but the girl was…how do I say it nicely…not considered attractive enough for him? They get so many nasty comments because people can’t comprehend that a handsome man can like a woman that people don’t think is attractive.” Trailing off, you let a hand rest on your pregnant belly before reaching out and taking his hand. He instantly links your fingers together, squeezing gently.

There’s a wrinkle between his brows, indicating his internal confusion. Jungkook had always had such strong eyebrows that you’ve always found hot. There’s not much about him you don’t find hot, from the way he tongues his cheek when he’s irritated or the tattoos on his arms shift as the muscles beneath work. And that’s not even talking about the weird fetish you have for his hands.

Men liked butts and boobs, but you’d gone a little feral more than once because of his hands and thighs.

“How…how does that relate to us?” The innocence with which he asks makes your heart clench with so much love for him. Jungkook’s always been such a simple man, despite how complicated he looked. He knew what he liked and what he loved, and he didn’t care what others thought about that. It’d taken you a while for you to realise that, but it was something you’d grown to cherish about him.

Smiling, you lift his hand and rest it against your heart.

“You’re adorable, have I told you that? It’s relevant because you’ve always been god hot and I’ve just been…me. You know if we were on social media then people would be like ‘what the fuck is going on here?’.” His cheery mood disappears and he scowls, lips pursing out in that cute pout he always does and making his lip ring push out even further.

“That’s stupid, don’t say that. You’re hot.” Grinning, you shuffle over before leaning into him, curling yourself happily into his side. He lets go of your hand and takes the opportunity to wrap his arm around you, cuddling you while letting his fingertips brush the sides of your swollen stomach. It’s just light enough to be ticklish and you shiver.

“I don’t think anyone except you has ever called me that, but it’s okay. As long as you think it. You know people always have some awful opinions, and there’s probably some of our friends who had those thoughts when we first started dating. I know for a fact that Jimin teased you about having a cougar as a girlfriend.” Jungkook grunts, obviously still grumpy about how you’ve put yourself down.

“Jimin was just jealous. Still is. I was twenty-four when I met the love of my life whereas he’s now thirty-two and still hasn’t found his.” You swat his stomach lightly, tutting at him.

“Don’t say that, that’s mean. Plus, I was only two years older than him when we met.” He hums, the sound vibrating through his chest to your cheek and you sigh gently, wriggling to get a better position. You’re excited to finally be a mom, it had taken two years of trying and a year of IVF to finally get pregnant, but god, being pregnant was not as fun as it was made out to be.

“Anway, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care what other people think. And I’m not blind or oblivious, I do notice it. I just don’t care. I thought you were pretty in your pictures and I liked how you’d got your personality across, so I went for it. You know me, if I want something then I get it. It was hard to keep my hands off you on our first date, I really wanted to see you naked but I could tell you were not down for that.” Lifting your head, you raise your brows at him in shock. He’d never mentioned this before.

“We saw a kids' film! With kids in the audience!” 

“Okay, I just need to point out that you do remember I was a young, horny man. You know how much I love sex, and how much I love your body. I had a very good orgasm that night with my hand.” There’s a tingle that runs through you as he says that, and you’re pleased that it’s not shyness from his blunt words but a thread of desire.

Why has he never told you this? You don’t realise you’ve said that out loud till he responds.

“Because I didn’t want to come across as some idiot young guy that just thinks with his dick. I was on a date with this super sexy older woman who had her shit together, no way was I ruining that.” Smiling, you bite your lip and hug him a little tighter as pleasure bubbles through you.

“You never fail to surprise me, you know that?”

“Good, keeps our relationship interesting. And in answer to your unsaid question…I’m with you instead of whatever imaginary woman you’ve imagined in your head for me because I want to be. Because, I love you. You’re it, and I knew that the first time I heard your voice on the phone. Heard you say hello and thought ‘yep, that’s it, that’s the woman I’m gonna marry’.” That makes you snort with laughter, using his chest to push yourself up and give him a disbelieving look.

“I know you’re a sappy romantic but you’re not that much of a romantic. You didn’t even say that in your wedding speech, and you were a sobbing mess in that.” You tease lightly, grinning at his mock affronted look.

“Excuse me, I’m very romantic. I’m so romantic that if you open the dictionary and look up romantic, there’s a picture of my face. Which is why I never mentioned it. That fact is for me and you only, other people can’t know. Maybe Mochi can when they’re older to hear it.” At that, he shifts until he can rest the whole palm of his hand against your stomach.

There’s a pause, the heat of his hand burning through your clothes before you feel the tell-tale flutter and Jungkook grins with simultaneous pride and amusement. The baby loves hearing Jungkook, and somehow always knows when their father is touching your belly. Neither of you knew what gender you were having, and neither of you cared as long as the baby was healthy. And Mochi was the nickname that Jimin had used and it had stuck.

Ignoring all that, you reach up and tilt his head towards you and simply look over his face. This close, you get to see all the pores of his skin and even the freckles that are too light to see from far away. The subtle shade alongside his jaw and mouth as his evening stubble starts to grow in, something he’ll soon be shaving off as he hates having hair there.

But your favourite thing about Jungkook, physically at least, is his wide eyes that portray every emotion he feels. They’d been your favourite aspect of him in his pictures when he’d first matched with you, and six years later they remain your favourite thing. You hope your baby gets his starry eyes.

“I love you.” You say simply, feeling your stomach bubble with happiness and not Mochi kicking as his eyes give away his smile before his mouth does. They do this adorable thing where the skin beneath his eyes thickens, creating an adorable eye smile before he does it with his mouth. That’s when you know he’s really happy.

“I love you, too. You don’t think about this stuff often, right? Cos I love you as you, and I always have. No matter what you looked like, or what you thought you looked like. And if you’re worrying over this then I haven’t done my job right.” He sounds so serious and concerned, his brow creasing once more as he dips his head to keep your eyes in sight.

Age is looking good on him, and you fear him in twenty years. He’s going to be movie star hot, and he’s all yours.

Trailing your fingers over his lower lip and playing with his lip ring, a familiar motion to you both by now, you give him a soft smile.

“I swear, I don’t. It was just that story I read. I did when we first got together but…you’ve shown me over the years so…not anymore. I trust you.”

“Good, because I don’t have any regrets. Best decision I made to message you, and it was obviously the same for you.” Laughing, you tickle his sides as he lets out breathy giggles and tries to avoid you without jostling you too much.

As you play with him, enjoying the intimate moment of quiet and happiness with your husband, you feel your baby kick excitedly. Pausing, you look at Jungkook with a raised brow before taking his hand and resting it on your stomach.

“You’ve got Mochi all excited now, so now you need to calm them down or mommy’s not gonna get much sleep. And then you’ll probably regret messaging me when I’m being grumpy.” That makes Jungkook grin, the expression mischievous on his face and your heart thumps hard with love for this beautiful, kind and funny man who loves you so deeply despite what society says.

Leaning forward, he keeps an eye on yours as he presses a kiss to your stomach before whispering.

“Remember that, Mochi, for when you’re born. Nothing is worse than a grumpy mommy, so please be nice to daddy and calm down.” 

“Hey! You weren’t supposed to agree with me.” You whine, pouting in an exaggerated manner that makes him laugh.

“Well, sweetheart, what is it you always say to me? A happy wife is a happy life, and a happy wife is always right?”

“Well, I’m clearly wrong in this case so you should say so!”

“You also say I shouldn’t tell lies, and we shouldn’t be setting a bad example for Mochi.”

“Jeon Jungkook!”

#armiesnet #networkbangtan #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook smut #bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #jungkook fic #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fanfiction #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader

[klein-sodor-bahn]

The lost express engine

Gordon on his way encounters an engine. At first all seems fine, but then the engine becomes more and more distressed until she suddenly races away into the next station: Bitterfeld.

Let me tell you a story about a lost engine which was even forgotten by her own sisters. Based on the story of a German pacific that met a terrible fate.

The lost express engine

Gordon loved visiting Germany. He was traveling down from Berlin. The night pitch black. Neither moon nor stars were visible. Gordon’s lamps cut through the dark like mighty blades of light. “I can’t wait to see Henry again.”, chuffed the big engine excitedly. Then from afar they heard an engine approaching behind them. Its barking chuffs were deep and powerful. “Who has to haul a train so late at night”, wondered the engine. The noise got louder and soon Gordon’s crew could recognize its shape. It was an 01, the sort which had been rebuilt in East Germany. “Hello”, called out Gordon. The engine looked over and Gordon couldn’t help but feel uneasy. “Hallo”, a female voice responded it was like a whisper. “Where are you heading?” “To Leipzig” “Oh I’m heading there as well, but in Dresden I’ll take on water and rest”, remarked Gordon. “Water”, gasped the other engine, “I… I need water”. Gordon was alarmed. “Hey, stop your engine is running out water”, his driver called over, but no response. “Hilf mir, bitte”, the Black Engine began to whimper. Gordon and his crew shouted and shouted, but the men on the footplate didn’t react. Suddenly the engine accelerated and rushed past Gordon. He gave chase. “You have to stop! You have to stop!”, the blue engine yelled desperately. On the horizon lights of a city appeared. The screeching of the brakes cuts through the air. But to Gordon’s horror he heard the other engine scream in agony: “STOP! STOP! SOMETHING IS WRONG!?!” Then Boom and a gut wrenching scream shatters the nightly silence. “Noooo”, cried Gordon. He slowly crept into the station, but there was nothing. Just silence. Gordon stops. He looks around. The rails were empty. Not even a hint of steam was in the air, beside his own. Only a cold wind that made him shiver “You saw it too, didn’t you”, whispered the engine. “We did”, his crew replied. Gordon slowly continued his journey. In Dresden he took on water, before going to rest in the sheds. Beside him snored Viktoria. She looked just like the engine Gordon had seen.

The next morning Gordon awoke to the other engines chatting and sizzling in their berths. “Good morning, Gordon”, greeted Viktoria him. A warm smile on her smoke box. “We didn’t hear you arrive” “We?”, he looked around and to his shock four other engines that looked just like Viktoria sat in the other berths of the shed. “Are. Are these your sisters?”, Gordon asked rather stunned. “Indeed they are”, chuckled Vicky. “Are you sure those are all your sisters?”, Gordon asked suspiciously. “What do you mean?”, asked the engine right next to Vicky, “Only five of our sort survived” “Oh” “Good Morning, ladies”, chortled Heinrich who had just woken up. Gordon jumped. He hadn’t noticed the massive green pacific. “Don’t be frightened, Gordon. It’s only me”, Heinrich laughed. “Only you, haha so funny scaring me like that”, Gordon scoffed. Heinrich glanced confused at Viktoria who looked equally as helpless. “What has gotten into you”, she asked confused. The other 01s stopped their conversations and looked at Gordon. Gordon with a lump in his throat recalled last night’s event. When he had finished the German engines were pale and gave each other nervous looks. “I think you might have met 01 1516”, Heinrich spoke up with a shaky voice, “I…I met her a couple of times…one time I chased after her and arrived at Bitterfeld before her…” The usually so straight forward and powerful engine stared horrified into the distance. “She…exploded right before my eyes” Gordon couldn’t believe what Heinrich had said, but he felt deep down the big engine was right. But then Gordon frowned: “Viktoria” “Ja- Err yes?” “What was her name?” “Her name? Who’s name?” “The name of engine that died at Bitterfeld”, Gordon pressed her. “I- We-“, her eyes dart to her sisters who just sit there like fish in the water, “We don’t know.” “What?!”, Gordon fumed, “She was your sister!” “That’s enough Gordon”, hissed one of Viktoria’s sisters, “Don’t meddle in our matters. You have kicked up enough dust for the day.” Gordon wanted to retort something, but kept it to himself and decided to just glare at the 01 that had spoken up. She just snorted.

Later Gordon visited Henry who began to ponder after Gordon told him what had happened: “Odd…maybe my driver knows someone who knows that engine’s name” Gordon and Henry explained Johanna Drachenzorn the situation. The young woman had heard of the story of 01 1516. “I’ll see what I can do”, she promised. Throughout the day Gordon couldn’t help, but feel the burning glares of Viktoria’s sisters on his boiler when he met one of them. They didn’t even whistle a quick greeting. This went on until it was Gordon’s time to leave. He sat again with all five 01.5s in the same shed. But to his surprise Johanna Drachenzorn came to the shed, a piece of paper in hand. “I found her name”, she smiles. “You did what?!”, Viktoria gasped and her sisters began to whisper. “Gordon asked me”, Mrs. Drachenzorn continued, “ Do you wanna hear it?” “Yes”, Viktoria was on the verge of tears. “01 1516-2 died in 1977 due to her crew mishandling her leading to a boiler explosion. She went by the name Alix” “Alix…why did we forget her”, Viktoria wept. “It’s okay”, soothed Gordon. The other 01.5s looked down at the rails. “Maybe she can rest now”, one wondered.

This evening Gordon left for Hamburg so he could return to England the following day. And when he approached Bitterfeld he noticed a black shadow sitting on the platform. As he drew closer he recognized the engine. It was Alix softly smiling surrounded by thick clouds of steam. Henry’s driver had shown him a picture of her. So Gordon was sure it was her. “Thank you, Gordon”, she said as he raced past. But as his driver turned to look back. The German express engine was no longer there. Gordon could sense a set of buffers touching his own for a brief second. He lets out a sigh of relief as he puffs along the line. Leaving Bitterfeld behind.

#ttte #thomas and friends #ttte gordon #gordon the big engine #ttte fanfic #ghost stories #ghost engine #Bitterfeld 1977 #ttte henry #henry the green engine #Viktoria the motherly engine #ttte oc #akagi’s ocs #my writing #A ghost story for Gordon #Humble Gordon moment #happy halloweeeeeeen

[an-au-blog]

Thinking about Shuggy college au and got to thinking about the relative ages of other characters and now I’m thinking of end of High school aged Frobin. Robin is that loner goth girl turned popular goth girl that is still seen as a bit odd but she’s smart and helpful and has a slightly morbid sense of humor that just endears her to her classmates. Franky is that loud jock who comes to school in way too short shorts even when the weather doesn’t permit for it. You’d think he’s a huge dumbass from the way he acts sometimes but he actually knows a lot of stuff and gets decent grades and is pretty nifty with machines (Also sometimes babysitting his kid neighbor Usopp and teaching him how to not hit his thumb with a hammer). Both of them having this kind of „end of a slow burn“ relationship where Franky is trying to gather his nerves and tell his long term friend that he has feelings for her and it’s completely fine if she doesn’t, but also she’s going to move to college after the end of this school year and he’s afraid about what that means for them and not to mention he’s „smart“ but Robin is like „SMART smart“ and is going to study history and oh GOD what if this is the thing that makes them loose contact and Oh god, oh no, oh fuck.

… probably ends with her just spontaneously taking his hand and asking HIM out, completely oblivious that he has been fretting over this for almost an entire school year. Just felt like the right thing to do to her. A decision she made right that moment.

I... I never really calculated her years in the college au and at first I thought, pft, she won't be that old but then... like she IS around 10/11 years older than Luffy and assuming he's around 5/6 she'd be in her last years of school omg D:' I'm supposed to be good at math how did I not see this???

Also you have no idea how happy I am, this is my first frobin ask I was so happy when I saw it and then my happiness doubled because it's the college au hahaha :')

If I haven't given you a name, can I call you Franon? Or Fronan?? (haha cuz frobin + anon...)

(Edit: by the time I was halfway through writing this post, I realized I've written an entire subplot lol':))

Robin is definitely that weird kid in school that's a bit too smart for her own good and most teachers just think she's a smartass. The type that even though she moved schools and now she's pretty (and still a bit weird, just hides it better), she still has the outcast mentality. She doesn't know how to be herself and she definitely doesn't know what to do, react or even comprehend that someone wants to be friends with her. Let alone to be interested in her romantically.

Franky on the other hand is so outgoing because he's so weird. People will see him in a blizzard in his short shorts and sunglasses and go "how the heck are you not cold". He'd respond with "oh, I'm freezing! I have a parka and two cotton shirts under there!" and people would laugh along. The type to high-five and greet random people he's talked to once as if they've been friends for ages. I feel like he'd also kinda be the class clown but in a somewhat respectful way. There's a meme about someone calling Prometheus a mad lad and then Hermes a Chad, and I feel like that would be his vibe.

Also, I'm sorry Fronan/Franon, but I'm absolutely stealing the idea that Franky babysits Usopp and they have fun arts and crafts type of bonding. He'll need it for the stuff I've been planning for him and Yasopp >:]]]

Everyone assumes he's a moron, but it's until Robin sees him in one of his extracurricular advanced classes that she realizes he's not only smart but funny and fun to be around. It turns out that they also have a lot in common and quickly become friends.

Also him overthinking it and her asking him out is so on brand imo and I absolutely love it. And maybe here comes into play the fact that he's so friendly with everyone so he automatically assumes people like him so he doesn't know what signs for romantic feelings look like? And how she doesn't think anyone could like her in that way? I can imagine him trying to talk himself out of it because she's going places and what could he give her to make her be with him anyway. While she's sitting next to him already planning a schedule for their talks for their long distance relationship.

And of course, their long distance relationship works very well. They both love each other so much they try their best to have at least two or three nights to talk. In fact, their relationship has a very strong foundation of getting to know each other because of the physical separation.

Or so I'd like to think hehe :')

#frobin #one piece frobin #college au #franky x robin #robin x franky #op #answers

[thedirtygrid]

LEWIS AND GEORGE’S NAUGHTY GAME AFTER WINNING THE BRAZILIAN GP, FEATURING YOU (A Short Fantasy Story)

The outline of this story was requested by a follower.

WARNINGS - 18+ Strong sexual content

Summary: You are George Russell’s physio for the weekend and have to take some time massaging his sweaty body once he wins the race. This is when he gets you to do things to him you never even imagined, and then Lewis reveals a huge secret…

The moment had finally come! After a whole season of no winning, the boys had finally done it. George Russell has won the 2022 Brazilian Grand Prix, with Lewis finishing second! You were so proud, you wanted to hug them both the second they got out the car.

You were George’s physio for the weekend, stepping in for his usual colleague, who had fallen ill the previous week. You presumed George would be seriously stiff after a hard, long race so started preparing yourself for when he arrived after the podium celebrations.

When George arrived in the room, he closed the door behind him, leaving it as just the two of you. He sat down on the sofa and let out a huge sigh of relief. “I can’t believe we did it!” He said while undoing his race suit, revealing his bare chest as he dropped the top half of his suit to the floor. You couldn’t help but notice that he looked delicious.

His Abs were fully popping out after the long race, and you noticed his arms looked very veiny. He slipped his racing shoes off, plonked them on the side near his feet, and took another deep sign while sitting back to relax.

You went over to give George a quick hug to congratulate him. As you did this you were surprised at how wet his body still was. His bare skin was smothered with sweat, and he was very warm to the touch. “I’m so proud of you! And of Lewis too” you added.

“More proud of me though I hope, I’m the one that won the race…” he responded. “I’ve been ahead of Lewis all year, and I’m set to finish ahead of him in the standings, so not bad at all really….”

He sat looking proud of himself as he put his arms behind his head and relaxed. “Can you start on my feet and legs, they’re so stiff” he asked.

“Of course, anything you want George” you responded.

You bent down to rest on the floor by his feet, and started massaging them. They were very warm to the touch, and the size of them made your hands look tiny. “You not gonna take my socks off too?” He added.

“Sure” you said while slipping off his white socks. They were definitely sweaty, but you had to remain professional as this was your job. You started feeling and massaging his feet for him.

“Ahhhh, beautiful” he commented as you ran your hands up and down them. “Do you think my feet are big?” he asked you

You didn’t quite know how to react, but responded with “yes I do, biggest I’ve ever had to physio”

“Haha I thought so, I’m quite proud of them, you know. You’ve probably noticed I always go on about how big the size of my shoes are, I think it’s pretty impressive…”

Before you could respond to him he added “and you know what it means if a guy has big feet…” he looked down at you and smirked.

You pretend to act dumb. “Oh yeah…what does it mean then?” You said while continuing to rub his feet.

“Pass me your hand” he said.

So you did. He moved your hand to his abs and placed them there. They were sticky to touch, you presumed it was a mixture of sweat and champagne. The feeling was good. He then started to slowly move your hand down, past his bellybutton and down into his boxer shorts.

“George!” You exclaimed

He didn’t listen and placed your hand on his hard cock, it was fully erect at this point. “Big feet…big cock” he whispered to you as you placed a firm grip on him

“You said you’d do anything I wanted, didn’t you?” He asked.

You blushed… “yeah…but what if…” he didn’t let you finish talking when you felt him tense up, and the tip of his dick roll out of his foreskin while you touched it. He felt warm, and already felt wet as well as pre-cum started to drip down your finger.

You started jerking him off, big strokes as he lay there, you could tell he was loving it.

He lowered his pants to down near his ankles as you continued to tug on his hard cock. “I need to go and do my interviews soon, so jerk faster!” he demanded. You were now starting to sweat as you tugged up and down on him. Your grip was tight and hard, you didn’t know how it wasn’t causing him discomfort, but he sat there with his eyes closed enjoying the feeling of your hands and moaning at the pleasure you were giving him

“Spit on it” he said to you. So you did - a lump of spit fell onto his tip, and you took extra care when rubbing it all in.

“Harder” he added.

You stroked his cock harder and faster than ever, you could feel sweat starting to drip off your forehead. You took your time to admire the view of his abs tensing while you gave him pleasure, until all the tension was released and huge beads of cum came flying out of him. You felt him throb as you gripped him, spewing out all over his abs.

When he had finished, he looked down at you as you dropped his cock to one side. “You’re not done yet” he added while smirking. “I’ve gotta go and do interviews now, I can’t be covered in my own milk.”

“Clean me up” he told you.

You went to reach for a towel when he grabbed your arm. “Where you going? Clean me up” he pointed to your mouth and slid his finger inside it. He rubbed his index finger on your tongue while repeating “clean me up”

You now understood what he meant…

His abs were covered with a thick layer of milky goo that he had just released from his huge balls. You started by rubbing it with your hand to see what the consistency was like…It was as thick and slimy as it looked, warm too.

You bent forward and placed your mouth on his abs, while sucking up the cum he had just released from inside of him. It tasted sour and salty, but somehow nice…it turned you on the thought of how you caused him to cum like this, and now you get to clean him up.

At this point there was a knock on the door “hello!” Said the man from outside.

“Shit” George said while quickly standing up, some cum still sticking to his abs, while he pulled his race suit back over him.

You wiped your lips of any residue cum on the side, and swallowed to free your mouth to speak.

George gave your arse a quick grab while moving to the door and opening it.

“Ah! Hello Lewis” he stated. “She’s a gooden!” He added while walking away

You couldn’t believe it, lewis stepped into the room and closed the door behind him just as George left.

“I need a massage” said Lewis “I’m so stiff”, this race was a killer”

Lewis sat down in the exact same place you had just been pleasuring George with your own bare hands…

“Can I get the same as what George had?” Lewis asked, without realising what you had actually given George.

“Of course, I’ll start with your feet and legs and see how you feel after.” You acted casually and professionally, you wanted to do your job properly and not fall into the same trap George set up.

You went to kneel down next to Lewis’ shoes, which he still had on, as you wiped to the side a few hairs that were dangling down on the front of your face from your fringe. You noticed your hand smelt like George’s cock and his cum…you felt embarrassed, as much as you enjoyed the smell, and you hoped Lewis wouldn’t notice.

You started the massage. Lewis was smaller than George, but he still had strong muscly legs and manly feet, you noticed, as you massaged them. “Can you do my back now?” He asked.

“Of course!” You were relieved he had asked for his back to be done as you enjoyed doing that even more. He lay face down as you started massaging his back. You could see the sweat dripping down his tattoos as he lay there, you noticed every detail as your hands glossed over his muscles.

Jerking off George had made you horny, and this was making you even hornier.

This is when Lewis slowly took one of your hands and placed it in his mouth. He took his time to suck on your fingers, and savour the taste of them.

“Shit that’s the hand I jerked off George with” you thought to yourself as he sucked on them. You noticed his back muscles twitch while he was sucking on them and he let out a groan of pleasure at the same time.

“These taste good….now Kiss me” he added. Lewis sat up and You leant in to kiss him. You spent a considerable amount of time making out, his tongue entered your mouth and yours entered his. You traded a lot of saliva in the process.

“Lie down” he told you

While you positioned yourself on the physio bed, he started pulling his boxer shorts off, you noticed his cock was just as big as George’s, and it was dripping with pre cum. He slowly slid it inside your pussy and at the same time mentioned “I’ve got a secret, do you want to know it?”

He started thrusting into you while he asked.

“Mhm” “argh” you groaned as he positioned himself inside of you. “Tell me”

He positioned his head next to yours, allowing you to lick his sweaty, thick neck. You noticed how it tasted sweet, like the champagne he had just been sprayed with, but also salty with the sweat he was also covered with. “I saw what you and George were doing in here…I’ve got CCTV in this room…”

You blushed and didn’t know what to say…At the same time he thrusted deeper and harder into you while adding “I watched the whole thing…I saw you jerking his hard cock…I saw you licking up his cum….”

He continued to fuck you hard and deep at the same time, this meant you were too deep in pleasure to fully respond to him, you just allowed him to keep talking.

“George and I have a special bond together you see” he added while thrusting even harder into you.

“We share and fuck girls together…” he added while groaning at the tightness of your walls that surrounded him.

“And we’ve chosen you…..”

He paused, before letting out a huge groan while biting the side of your neck. You felt his cum shoot inside of you, it filled you up completely…You could feel the milky substance float inside you as he lay on top.

You wish you could’ve tasted him to compare him to George , but he also felt so good inside of you.

“Meet us at my hotel room after the team have finished packing up…we’ll both be waiting” he whispered into your ear while he slowly slid his cock out of you. You felt a rush of cum leak out as he left.

You couldn’t believe it, George and Lewis had set up a trap to test if you were good enough for their little game. Their game which involved taking turns fucking you, or even fucking you at the same time…and they wanted you to meet them at the hotel later today. Did this mean you had passed the test? If so, what would that mean? Would that mean you got them both at the same time? You hoped so….part of you craved the idea, and the other part was nervous about it.

Lewis stood up and dressed himself. As he walked to the door he turned back to you and said “remember, my hotel later…room 300, it’s the penthouse”

“I’ll be there” you responded while still lying down on the bed, you could still feel his warm milk inside of you.

“And I’ll be taking this with me…” lewis said while opening the door.

He had your panties up by his face, pressed against his nose as he took a big inhale of them. “Mhm, can’t wait to taste where this came from later” he said while shoving the panties down his own boxers, before closing the door behind him.

You lay there and wondered what on earth was going on. You thought about how his cock was now resting on your panties as he walked around the paddock. You felt lucky.

You checked the time and prayed that it would go fast…you were too excited for the hotel….you wondered what they might do to you this time. You couldn’t wait.

…To be continued ;) part two coming soon.

#george rusell #george russell smut #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton smut #smut #fanfic #fictional story #fictional men #sweaty men #formula one #hotmen #hot muscles

[rising-volteccers]

So I was inspired by @cocosnowlo-drawings latest piece about Friede and Cap being partners in all circumstances. It wouldn't leave my head so I wrote out a short piece where Friede's reckless and it's from Cap's POV cause I thought it'd be a fun challenge haha!

Series: Pokemon Horizons

Characters: Friede, Captain Pikachu

--

“Cap!”

Regardless of the pain coursing through his small body, the sheer horror of seeing Friede jumping after him off the cliff stole all the air out of his little lungs. 

“No!” Cap cried when he saw his human dashing after him just seconds prior. “Don’t do it!”

Except Friede couldn’t verbally understand him, because he was human. Not did that stop them from sharing a deep, special bond mind you. It was just at this moment, seeing Friede reaching out for him during free fall that Cap wished his human took heed of his words.

Desperate fingers grabbed hold of his own outstretched paw. Cap immediately felt arms wrapped around him, tucking his form against a solid chest just seconds before impact. 

Cap didn’t know whose cry was louder; his or Friede’s. They rolled and tumbled, scraped against rocks and other sharp bits. Throughout this terrifying experience, his human never once let go of him, and Cap clung to his shirt with his eyes squeezed shut until at long last, they came to a stop. 

Several beats passed in silence. Cap felt disoriented, finding that flicking his right ear and trying to move his tail caused a lot of pain. Still, panic drowned out the pain when the arms around him loosened. Cap scrambled to sit up properly so he could get a good look at Friede.

Friede’s eyes were closed, and it was from being on his chest that let Cap knew he still breathed. The lens of his goggles were cracked. His favorite jacket had tears in them. Cap spotted scrapes on his cheeks and his hands, with more likely hidden beneath his clothes. What he hated seeing the most was the red liquid trailing down the side of his face, originating from somewhere beneath his goggles.

He was still. Cap hated seeing him still. Friede wasn’t meant to be still. 

Cap carefully crawled up his chest to gently place a paw on his uninjured cheek. He lightly patted it.

“Wake up,” he said. 

“Pika,” it sounded within the silent clearing. 

Cap fought to keep his fear in place when Friede didn’t react. He couldn’t let it pull at his electricity, making static build up in his cheeks. He’d long since evolved from that Pichu who couldn’t control the power he held within but at this moment, he felt that kind of little again. 

“Please wake up,” he pleaded, patting Friede’s cheek again.

“Pika pika,” was what stirred Friede at last. Cap pulled back at the soft groan, giving his human some room to reorient himself. Judging from the sharp hiss of pain when he shifted, he didn’t get out of the fall unscathed. 

“Ugh… Cap? ‘zzat you?” Friede mumbled, blinking a couple of times. He raised a careful hand to gently cradle his head. 

“Yes! Why did you do that? That was stupid!” Cap grumbled back.

To Friede, he only heard high pitched, aggravated squeaks. A chuckle turned wince slipped past his lips. Carefully, he tried to push himself into a sitting position. Cap watched worryingly as his arms shook but he managed enough to lean against the rocky wall for support. 

“I’m guessing that you’re mad at me, huh?”

“Yes! You didn’t have to do that!” Cap responded, crossing his arms whilst sporting a displeased look on his face. “You had my Pokeball on you! You could have returned me!”

Friede stared at him with faint amusement in his eyes. Despite the worry still brimming beneath his fur, Cap was almost tempted to shock him for finding this situation anywhere remotely humorous. 

“Sorry Cap. My body just moved on its own,” Friede eventually apologized. It seemed that he understood why from the rapid squeaks. He did look a touch remorseful now. “Sorry too for worrying you like this. You’re not too badly hurt, yeah?”

Cap wanted to keep his glare but his resolve folded once Friede lightly place a hand on his head, mindful of his injured ear. The weight brought more comfort than he realized, even more so when Friede scratched him at the particular spot that he liked. 

“I’m glad that you’re alright,” he spoke, voice soft. “I don’t know what I’d do if you…”

“How do you think I feel? We’re partners but you’re hurt,” Cap replied back, pressing his head more into his palm. 

Another faint chuckle in response to the train of soft Pika… from Cap. “Yeah, I messed up big time. I know that Mollie’s gonna have my hide for this. Think she’ll give you a pass at least.”

Cap nodded his agreement at that. Friede deserved it really. Did he forget that Cap had done a lot of falling before they met? Granted the only damage he got was recoil from Volt Tackle but the point still stood! Friede didn’t have to jump after him like that! It was stupid and reckless and…

It did stir warmth in his little heart. To know that his human cared as deeply as he does for him.

“Aww, not even pretending to disagree. I’m wounded,” Friede joked, doing that chuckle turned wince again. Cap hoped that they’d get rescued soon so he can get that treated. In the meantime, he settled keeping watch of the surroundings, ready to fire off warning shots to any wild Pokemon that dared to approach them.

Eventually, Cap picked up the sound of Charizard’s flapping wings and calls for Friede’s name. While it pained him to do so, he managed to shoot up a single Thunderbolt as a signal to their position. 

Soon, Cap stepped aside to let Mollie and Orla fuss over his human. They had arrived on Charizard and Metagross, who both asked him whether he was alright. Cap simply gave a thumbs up in response.

It was much later that the pair were all patched up back on the ship. Friede had bandages all over him while Cap had some on his tail and ear. As expected, Mollie gave his human an earful for his reckless behavior while Cap received gentle care and worry. He wasn’t surprised seeing that he rarely got hurt badly enough to get all bandaged up like this.

They were now back in Friede’s room. Both of them were ordered to take it easy for a few days so their injuries had time to heal. Cap knew that it was only a matter of time before both of them get a little stir crazy from the forced inactivity but until then, he was happy to be all curled up by Friede’s side as he slumbered, exhausted from today’s events.

#Pokemon Horizons #Pokeani #Anipoke #Professor Friede #Captain Pikachu #Hana writes stuff

[turtlecleric]

assumption - others have said in need of a hug (yes true) but also,

may not have been praised in the way that you deserved growing up and instead others tried to dim your light because they were envious or wanted to see you fail (->im here to tell you they suck ass. you're everything and more; skilled; determined; worthy; and i love you so so much and i am so so proud of you)

Did you know that I would die for you? Did you know that I love you so goddamn much? Did you?

This is way too much personal info that no one actually cares to know, probably, but. I'm sort of avoiding work on purpose at the moment and I'm having a really rough day. Who needs therapy when you have asks on Tumblr to rant in? (I'm joking, to be clear. Actual therapy is so valuable and important if you manage to find a competent professional who clicks well with you. The only reason I stopped going is because of Covid, time, and money.)

Warning: VERY long vent ahead, please do not feel obligated to read or respond

My dad was really good about praising me in ways that felt genuine, actually, though that made the times he /was/ upset with me all that much worse. My dad isn't perfect, and he's done some things and said some things that I'll never forgive, that I'll never be able to forget, but I would also do anything for him. I know he's there for me when I need it, I know he'll answer when I call, I know that he actually cares about me. He and maybe like two cousins are the only family I would never be able to cut off.

My mom... I guess it was just sort of the baseline bare minimum expectation that I would do things well, so when I /was/ praised it was just like... oh, good job sweetie! Proud of you! But it didn't feel... I don't know how to describe why but... I don't know. Now, when people tell me I do things well I always have that voice in my head that's like "they're just being nice, they don't actually think it's all that great, they expected you to do a much better job than this, actually, why did you even bother sharing? Why did you think this was something to be proud of?" I read way too far into things, interpreting neutral reactions, or even positive reactions that aren't as enthusiastic as I might have hoped for, as proof that people are simply being nice and don't really like what I do or make or say all that much. I always get stuck in this mindset that I'm not allowed to create mediocre content, like it all has to be Excellent or else it's Terrible.

I also remember in high school, posting some drawings on Facebook that I was really proud of. Two drawings, one with hands in chains and cut up and the other with healed hands glowing with holy light and cradling a cross. It was supposed to show the difference between life without God and life with God (I was... VERY religious as a teenager. I am now agnostic.), but she saw the first picture and freaked out, super pissed, yelling at me to take it down, to not embarrass her like that, because people were going to see that and think I was abused or depressed or something (haha... me? Depressed? Nahhhhh). And that was the moment when I knew I could never ever ever share anything even remotely dark with her, that if I ever were to express something that indicated I was anything other than good and happy and perfect then she would react similarly. She's also very judgemental regarding mental health, often made comments about how "people who are/do x are sick, there's just something wrong with them, make sure you stay away from people like that" while I'm sitting on the couch like... oof. That's me. So all my venting went to Tumblr where she couldn't see, and even now I mostly only vent on Tumblr and through writing. I have many wonderful friends that would gladly allow me to vent to them (I love you all so much I love you I love you I love you, thank you for being so kind), but I simply Cannot. I've had a friend before where it felt like all they did was complain, they were always so goddamn negative, and it became a chore to talk to them. I started to get angry every time they said or did something defeatist, I stopped enjoying talking or hanging out with them, and I refuse to be that person. Even if I'm told over and over that I don't come across that way, I'm so terrified of it that when I think about reaching out I start to think of that friend and about how I shouldn't bother people and I panic. Unless I've gotten to the point where I truly believe that nothing I do or say will ruin the friendship, then it's really hard to push through that fear. But that's so much harder than it used to be because I /did/ lose a friend that I thought I would have literally for the rest of my life, I was so 100% confident that we would be 80 years old still hanging out with each other and goofing around, so sure we could go through anything together and stay friends, I knew in my heart and soul that we would be friends until we died, and I was wrong. I was wrong. I also had a different friend who was always there for me, always praised me, always listened to me when I needed it and told me kind things and made sure I felt welcome and loved and viewed positively, and then he fucking assaulted me one night when he thought I was asleep.

Anyway. When I /did/ fail at things growing up, it was either punished more severely than necessary or straight up laughed at. Mom was very hot and cold, too, you could never tell what kind of mood she was going to be in that day. (She is still like this. It's well known in my family that you never know which version of her you're going to get.) Things are fine one moment and then suddenly I'm in trouble for something I didn't even realize I did wrong (like with the drawings), so I'm just. Terrified of not doing well enough at things, of disappointing people, of people being annoyed with me or upset with me over something I didn't even realize was rude or mean or wrong to begin with.

"Don't overstay your welcome; don't bother people" was pounded into my head. I can't express how often I start to say or type something and then think, "No one cares. Stop bothering people. You're being too much, you're being annoying, they're tired of you, just keep it to yourself." I'm working on it but. Yeah. Half the time I still just stop talking or backspace and stay quiet. Even typing this, I'm like... you should delete this. You're basically just begging for attention, and if anyone says anything about this to you then it'll only be because they felt obligated to and they're going to start seeing you as a whiny, pathetic, manipulative person, and they're going to get tired of you and roll their eyes every time you say anything, even if it's not you venting, or they'll see this and think about how stupid or weird it is for you to put this information out on the internet, and even this sentence right here is proof that they'd be right because you're aware of all these thoughts and you're still doing it.

But then another part of me thinks that if I can't even vent on my own blog on a post that literally no one is required to read that is also hidden under a readmore and clearly states that it's a vent post, then where /can/ I vent? And if someone else posted this, would I be this harsh on them? And what's so wrong with seeking attention and comfort? Why is that unforgivable in yourself but admirable in others? Why are you crying at work? Why aren't you doing your job? Why aren't you better? Why aren't you better?

#asks #I'll delete this later probably #fuck #anyway! back to work! #i have so much to do and not enough time to do it so. I'll be working late today. again.

[wackyartor]

Hello! So I was curious about how Rise! Leo would react to Reader falling out of love with him?

(For some background (I think?😭) Leo and Reader have been dating for a while enough for him to fall head over heels for them but Reader slowly losing the spark and slowly starts falling out of love, how would you think He would take the news?)

Anyway you have a great day! And remember you can always deny this req if you wanna!

Rise!Leo x Reader

ANON...THIS IDEA IS AWEESOMEE,HOW ARE YOU GUYS THINKING GREAT PROMPTS LIKE THISS? ANNGSSSTTT LETSGOOO!!

A/N: i hope i nailed the story along with your request!

A/N(2): Gender of the reader was not specified so i had to go with gender-neutral, i hope you don't mind!

Summary: You and leo have been together ever since you guys knew you had feelings with each-other but leo is starting to notice that the spark of your relationship is slowly fading away.

Reader's pronouns: They/Them

he wouldn't really assume anything at first, thinking you were just having one of those bad days which he completely understands.

He would start noticing your behavior towards him like for example;

not responding to any of his corny jokes or pick-up lines he got from the internet, he was expecting a reply like "that's so cheesy, leo!" or "not funny" but instead, you seem bored or just gave him a simple nod while you go back to what you were doing.

"Haha.. they're probably just busy, leo! don't think about it too much" he thought to himself.

when he tries to kiss you on your face, you would always push him away. "not now, leo."

He admitted that he was hurt by that, he respects your boundaries of course, but it's been happening like this for a couple of days now.

Since you two would always throw affection to each-other and even his brothers are annoyed at your guy's lovey-dovey moments.

Y/N was on the kitchen, grabbing some snacks for themselves before some hands wrapped around their waist.

Of course, it was leo! he buried his head on your shoulder.

"babbyyyy, i miss youuu! give me attention right now." leo whined.

"Not now, leo. you can see I'm busy." Y/N blurted out.

"of what, eating all of my snacks?" leo chuckled.

"I'm serious, leo. please can we just talk later?" Y/N says as they moved themselves out from his grip.

"Ohkaay.. okay! give me a kiss first?" he grinned, pointing his cheek.

Y/N walked out of the room after they got the snacks.

That left leo dumbfounded and hurt? "no kiss then today haha.. but enjoy whatever you're doing babe!" he says, waving at you before you left the room.

after that, he TOTALLY did not cry at his room later at night.

He wondered, why you were acting like this?

So he ironically goes to his phone and searched. "Why is my S/O avoiding me?"

and he thought... could he be? that you don't love him anymore?

he wanted to hear it from YOU, so he then went to where you were to confront this.

Every couple needs proper communication, right? then that's what he's doing.

He finds you at the living room, watching the movie all by yourself.

The others probably went to go somewhere else.

Leo soon took a deep breath. "BABYYY!!!" he shouted out as he goes to give you a surprise hug, making you two fell from the floor.

"OW- What the- leo? what's wrong with you..?" Y/N groans as they moved him off from themselves, then they quickly sat up.

"Do you love me?" Leo asked so sudden, as he also sat up, looking at you.

"What?"

"do. you. love. me? yes or no, babe, i just wanna know." Leo quickly replied.

Y/N sighed, you didn't feel the spark anymore like you guys used to, so they tried avoiding him, thinking they just needed space to think or a way to love him back again.

"do you.. not love me anymore?"

"I'm sorry leo."

His heart broke to MILLIONS of pieces when he heard that, so it was true? all this time.. he treated them so good. was he just a bad boyfriend, was he just not good enough?

"i just don't feel like it anymore, like the times we used to be, i just.... i don't know." Y/N felt so bad saying this to him.

but it was the only way for him to know the truth finally.

leo didn't know what to say, this is like the first time he went silent completely.

"LEO! a new mission was just given, we need you right now!" Ralph could be heard from the distance.

"Right, duty calls, heh. duty.." leo managed to laugh, trying not to cry infront of them. "i guess, I'll see you later. Y/N" Leo quickly stood up, walking off to his brother, he could feel tears coming down from his eyes, wiping them off.

Y/N just sat there, as they put their hands on their face, feeling so guilty.

#rottmnt leo x reader #rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rise!leo x reader #rise!leo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt x y/n #rottmnt x you #rottmnt x reader #rottmnt ralph #reader #ANGSSST MY LOVE