#how am i supposed to fix things and do better if nobody tells me how im fucking it up?

[icannotgetoverbirds]

):

#just got kicked from a discord server #was posting funnies when someone said 'hey that's not funny that's uncomortable actually' #and i was like 'o shit u right sorry' #(i mean there was a little back and forth before that but it was like less than 5 messages between the two of us) #and deleted the original message #and then im like okay moving on i have more funnies #and start posting them #and then i go back to post more and the server is gone? #i just. )))): #what did i do wrong. was i supposed to like be more upset about it for longer before i went back to the funnies? #that just seems unproductive #but like. they could've at least told me that??? #or whatever it is that i did wrong? #how am i supposed to fix things and do better if nobody tells me how im fucking it up? #idk #ik im vagueposting and that seems immature but like. i dw call anybody out in case this is all a misunderstanding #and also i just. maybe one of y'all knows where i fucked up based on context #maybe one of the people in that server will see this and dm me like 'hey here's what went wrong' #idfk! i have no idea what to do here #im just floundering #waiting on the callout post that im hoping will never come

[uselesslexbian]

the tortured poets department sentence starters.

i was supposed to be sent away, but they forgot to come and get me.

i love you, it's ruining my life.

my husband is cheating. i wanna kill him.

thought of calling you, but you won't pick up.

who's gonna hold you like me?

who's gonna know you, if not me?

sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me.

everyone we know understands why it's meant to be. 'cause we're crazy.

who else is gonna know me?

i should've known it was a matter of time.

we could've played for keeps this time.

once i fix me, he's gonna miss me.

he told me i'm better off, but i'm not.

fuck it if i can't have him.

i might just die, it would make no difference.

fuck it if i can't have us.

'cause fuck it, i was in love.

i stopped trying to make him laugh.

how much sad did you think i had in me?

you say i abandoned the ship, but i was going down with it.

just how low did you think i'd go before i'd self-implode?

you swore you love me, but where were the clues?

i'm just mad as hell 'cause i loved this place.

i forget if this was ever fun.

no, i'm not coming to my sense.

i know he's crazy, but he's the one i want.

i'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning.

i'll tell you something about my good name - it's mine alone to disgrace.

you ain't gotta pray for me.

no, you can't come to the wedding.

it's gonna be alright, i did my time.

i will never lose my baby again.

ain't no way i'm gonna screw up now that i know what's at stake.

they said i was a cheat. i guess it must be true.

yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine.

tell me i'm dispicable, say it's unforgivable.

am i allowed to cry?

i keep recalling things we never did.

someone told me there's no such thing as bad thoughts.

if it's make-believe, why does it feel like a vow we'll both uphold somehow?

they're gonna crucify me anyway.

what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy?

you don't get to tell me about "sad."

if you wanted me dead, you should've just said.

who's afraid of little old me?

at all costs, keep your good name.

you don't get to tell me you feel bad.

so tell me everything is not about me, but what if it is?

say they didn't do it to hurt me, but what if they did?

i'm always drunk on my own tears, isn't that what they all said?

i'm fearsome, and i'm wretched, and i'm wrong.

you caged me, and then you called me crazy.

i am what i am 'cause you trained me.

i can fix him. no really, i can.

come close, i'll show you heaven.

trust me, i can handle me a dangerous man.

you said i'm the love of your life.

well, you took me to hell, too.

what we thought was for all time was momentary.

are they second-hand embarrassed that i can't get out of bed 'cause something counterfeit's dead?

you're the loss of my life.

i can handle my shit.

he said he'd love me all his life, but that life was too short.

i can do it with a broken heart.

i'm so obsessed with him, but he avoids me like the plague.

i cry a lot, but i am so productive. it's an art.

you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart.

i'm sure i can pass this test.

they said, "babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it" and i did.

'cause i'm miserable! and nobody even knows!

was any of it true?

who the fuck was that guy?

they just ghosted you. now you know what it feels like.

i don't even want you back.

you didn't measure up in any measure of a man.

were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?

'cause it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden.

i would've died for your sins. instead i just died inside.

i'll forget you, but i'll never forgive.

i haven't come around in so long, but i'm making a comeback to where i belong.

this town is fake, but you're the real thing.

the crown is stained, but you're the real queen.

you're the new god we're worshipping.

it's hell on earth to be heavenly.

#rp ask meme #ask meme #rp prompts #rp starters #rp meme #lyric starters #lyric memes #idk what else #if there's typos no there's not

[riordanness]

— say don’t go - [tmr!newt]

wordcount: 0.9K

warnings: uh- you have the flare

requested: no

We’d been running for… how long? It felt like forever. Days and days of scorching heat, oppressive sunlight, harsh winds. My throat feels dry all the time, my eyes ache, and my legs are rubber.

At least I have Newt. No one could ask for a better friend. He’s always there for me, right beside me no matter what. He gives me the water even though I know he must be just as thirsty as I am.

He makes sure he’s the one carrying the pack we’re supposed to be sharing; he’s always taking my turns.

How can I tell him I know I’m not immune? That the cranks scratched me back in that old warehouse a few days ago? The weight of knowing my days are dissolving in front of my eyes is so heavy I can barely breathe. What should I do? What does anyone do, knowing you’re about to die?

I know I have to tell him soon. I can’t keep putting it off — it’s killing me in more ways than one.

Minho calls for a stop hours after nightfall. I have lost complete track of time; too lazy to keep track with my wristwatch. My head is fuzzy enough as it is.

Newt glances at me, and gives me a weak smile. I try to return it, but I can’t. I collapse to the ground, my knees giving way after one too many hours of walking.

Newt is at my side in an instant. “Are you alright?”

I try to nod my head. “Just… tired. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He holds out our shared water bottle. There’s barely a gulp left in the bottom.

I shake my head. “You take it. I had it last.”

“No.” Newt is serious. “You need it more than I do. Besides…” He hesitates, but doesn’t continue. I’m too scared to ask what he means.

I eventually give it and take the water, the few semi-cold drops helping immensely. I feel my body shutting down, my eyes trying to close.

Newt shifts over to sit beside me. “Go to sleep, love.”

I don’t even try to stay awake. I lean against him and am instantly in darkness.

The next thing I know, I’m startled awake. I don’t know why, as it’s still pretty dark, the air is still cool, and none of the boys have stirred. I wonder briefly if a sound in the night woke me, but I see and hear nothing.

It’s probably just the growing anxiety and disease taking over my brain. I inch away from Newt, desperate not to wake him. He’s been doing so much for me, for everyone. I owe him my life ten times over, and I don’t want to disturb maybe the last peaceful sleep he may get.

I get to my feet, and my eyes stray to Newt’s sleeping face. I have a ridiculous urge to touch his cheek. He looks so soft and pretty and perfect, just laying there.

I force myself to turn around. I walk a minute, until I stumble across a little boulder and sit down, my chin in my hands. This illness inside of me is eating me up. I can feel myself fading away, everything that makes me me slowly dissolve into nothing.

I don’t know how long I sit there, despairing.

Eventually, someone approaches. I can tell by the slightly uneven footsteps who it is even before they speak.

“Hey, Newt.” I have no emotion in my voice, struggling to keep it even.

“Y/n,” he replies, gently sitting beside me. “What’s up, love?”

I shrug. “Nothin’.”

Even though it’s too dark to tell properly, I know he’s got his you-are-such-a-bad-liar face on. “Y/n.”

I sigh. “Okay. Fine. I—“ But the words die in my throat. I can’t seem to find the right way to tell the boy I love more than anything that I’m about to, well, die.

“You have the bloody Flare.” The anger in Newt’s voice takes me by surprise more than the fact that he knows.

“What—“

He slams his hand into the rock we’re sitting on, cutting me off. “It’s not fair!” He hisses. “We have to fix this, we have to—I cant, lose you—“

His voice cracks, and I hear him inhale sharply, like he’s trying not to cry.

That makes me break down. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” I sob. “I just—I didn’t want… I don’t know. I just don’t want this.”

“Nobody shuckin’ wants the Flare, Y/n.” Newt’s voice is gruff, but almost teasing, a little reminder of what we used to be together. Joking, teasing best friends.

That makes me break down completely, and I cry heartbrokenly into my hands. I feel Newt wrap his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. I cry into him, clinging to his shirt like it’s my life.

“Newt,” I manage. “I’m going to die.”

“No you’re not.” His tone is firm. “I’m not gonna lose you. I—I love you, ya dumb shank.”

“What…?” My tears come to a hiccuping stop, and I lift my head to look at him. “You…”

He lets out an embarrassed chuckle. “Yeah. Sorry. Bad timing?”

I shake my head, a smile on my face despite it all. “I love you too, idiot.”

“Oh,” Newt laughs. “Oh, okay. Good.”

I lean towards him, pressing a kiss to his mouth. “Just hold me, please? Help me forget for a while.”

And Newt does exactly that.

#newt #newt x reader #tmr #maze runner #the maze runner #maze runner fanfiction #newt x reader fanfic #tmr fanfic #thomas brodie sangster #tmr newt #newt maze runner

[phoenixyfriend]

[squints at the MCU] Tony Stark has displayed more ability to weather interrogation and torture than Steve Rogers.

This is "(displayed more)(ability)," not "(displayed)(more ability)," to be clear.

(I know fiction’s depiction of torture is famously propagandafied, but in this case, it’s not about torture for information so much as physical traumas shown on screen.)

(Anyway, have a rant I did on discord the other day.)

It's not really so much about "resisted the urge to hand over information" as "survived a truly harrowing experience and still came out of it trying to do good."

Tony's very first movie involves getting repeatedly drowned while in constant pain from bomb injuries as a civilian contractor, and I… don't think I can remember anything even a little similar with Steve

I don't think he's ever been captured for long before breaking out? All his injuries are in active battle, not torture.

Like... Steve went through something horrible with the ice and losing Bucky, nobody can argue that. But I think it's very telling, sometimes, that movie Steve, especially 2012 movie Steve, is completely unaware of the absolute nightmare that Tony experienced in his solo movies.

I have so many feelings about Tony Stark being the epitome of "guy who was raised and manipulated into being a bad person by someone he trusted, and (after a horrible experience) attempts to be a better person, constantly and consistently, even if he sometimes fucks up in the execution."

And the way that some fics elide his experiences in cleaning up other people's messes (first Obadiah's, then Howard's) and how that doubtlessly compounded his many neuroses from fixing messes that he did actually create himself is just

I have a lot of feelings

And am also feeling a little bitter and salty about how Tony Stark's MCU incarnation reportedly took some inspo from Elon Musk... and a little petty and satisfied about just how drastically we've all be shown that Musk can never live up to the idea of 'billionaire with inherited wealth who actually, without hesitation, risks his own life to save millions' that he tried to use PR to achieve in the media with 'my electric cars are gonna save the world' stunts about things he didn't actually have a hand in inventing

I'm just reading some fics I really enjoyed when I was still in the YA fandom, and there was a reference to a line Steve said in the movies and I started thinking (again) about how frequently fans take lines from Steve or Sam about Tony as gospel, because they haven't seen Tony's movies, and the lines from the star spangled boys are contextually meant to show that they don't know jackshit about Tony or his life, because they are directly contradicted by multiple prior films.

Also like... how often Steve's traumas get explored (in fic) in a way that Tony's just... don't? At most, his issues about Howard get explored, but that's it.

There's this moment in CACW that people take as Accurate and it infuriates me.

Tony Stark: [Back in the cell.] Just look. Because that is the fellow who was supposed to interrogate Barnes. [He shows a holographic image of Doctor Broussard.] Clearly, I made a mistake. Sam, I was wrong. Sam Wilson: That's a first.

Which, like... it's a bad movie. Obviously. But also

That line is immediately followed by Tony revealing that he's here to help the others and is sabotaging the security to make sure Ross can't take advantage, and yet fanfic still uses Sam's quote to promote anti-Tony agendas!

And 'Tony admits he fucked up' is. Like. Listen to me

Tony's first solo movie is fixing Obadiah's machinations. *

His second solo movie is fixing his Dad's fuckup.

His first team movie is fixing Thor's mistakes.

His third solo movie is fixing something that is only tangentially his fault.

It's not until AoU that the fuck-up is really his and his alone (well, not counting Bruce), and even then, even then, a massive portion of the blame is narratively laid at Wanda's feet!

And only then do we get this man, who has spent five movies seeing what happens when people don't take responsibility for their actions, or have anyone riding them to be ethical, who has criticized himself for neither having that oversight nor providing that oversight for people who snuck shit under his nose, that is when we get Tony weighing in on the side of "most countries on the planet are agreeing with this and it's for a reason, please work with me here, maybe we can get some of it rolled back to be less authoritarian and more reasonable."

* and removing himself from the military industrial complex he was raised and groomed to be in, but that's a system and not an individual act or a set 'villain'

Or as @firebirdeternal put it:

I would say that his first solo movie does have a large element of fixing his own mistakes too, it's just that his "mistake" was Trusting the Wrong Person and not taking personal responsibility for how his actions are affecting the world. (Which, he immediately does upon coming back from being captured? "We're going to immediately stop making weapons, because it's making the world worse" and then when Obadiah cuts him out of the company he goes "Oh. Okay no that didn't work, have to personally fix all this then.") and yeah it's just Tony have plenty of reasons to be on the side of "Someone needs to have oversight over this"

IM1 is such a good exploration of someone in privilege saying "this stops now" in a situation where they do have control because they have been confronted with their mistakes in a way that's unavoidable

It's also like, a great example of the fantasy of the Super Hero. Because Tony Stark, the businessman, even with all his wealth and knowledge, isn't able to stop the systemic harm being caused by His Own Company. One person isn't able to do that, even with the best of intentions. It isn't until he becomes something else, something more, a Super Hero, that he's able to make any kind of meaningful change on his own. Like IM1 is just a phenomenal movie. It understood it's subject material so incredibly well.

And people skip it and then take Steve and Sam at their word about Tony's strength of character and moral convictions and I scream.

THIS MAN FLEW A NUKE INTO A WORMHOLE WITH THE FULL EXPECTATION THAT HE WAS GOING TO DIE

Yeah, like, that Jump on the Grenade mentality is something that he and Steve actually literally share.

They both had 'jump on the explosive to save people' moments in their introductory movies.

I find so much more strength and inspiration in stories like Thor and Tony, where they are inherently fuck-ups and were shitty people and they are trying so damn hard to be better, which is more Tony than Thor really, but both of them and their first movies are just. I find that more inspiring than Steve or T'Challa or any other hero who was already a good person and just Became Great.

Tell me about the person who has to struggle to find that moral choice. Tell me about Natasha dragging herself from her oceans of blood and Tony fighting the government over whether they have the rights to use weapons he's created and about Thor having to reckon with his family's power being born of imperialistic ravaging of other cultures.

I want to hear about the people for whom being good is hard and a choice they don't have to make, but then they make it anyway.

Also I stand by "I am Iron Man. [infinity snap]" being the most amazing bookend the MCU could have done and probably the best part of the Endgame.

#Tony Stark #character analysis #phoenix talks #MCU #Iron Man Movies #Iron Man #Avengers #AoU #CACW #AEG #torture mention

[palossssssand]

Transmission

A short comic about Denchu, the last of the squad members who stayed behind in the domes, and Kanu, who went to the surface in search of the ones who went missing.

Text below in case my handwriting isn’t very legible!

Denchu: Please please please go through…

D: …

Kanu: zzzt…Denchu?

D: Kanu…!! Oh thank cod-

K: Perfect timing! I have something good to show, er, tell you!

D: -sniff- Oh yeah? Tell me all about it…How have you been? What’s new?

K: I just finished putting up my storefront sign!

D: Really?! That’s so great!! So, money hasn’t been too tight?

K: Nah, the folks here have been helpin’ me out. It’s been pretty smooth sailing.

D: I see. Seems like you’ve been doing well.

K: Yup.

K: And also! My beard’s finally coming in!

D: Aaah what!!! I’ll bet it’s soo cute…What I’d give to see you right now…

K: So, how about you? Still hangin’ in there?

D: Mm. Well, it’s been okay…

D: You have no idea how many times I’ve had to fix this thing.

K: Like…10?

D: More like 20. The damn parts are so fiddly.

K: Yeesh!

D: I don’t get that much time to work on this, y’know. I’m surprised it even went through.

K: Well, you know me. I fix mine up every now and then. I think I know how.

D: How’s the search for Kinoga, Trito, and Agara?

K: …

D: …Kanu?

K: Well, I haven’t seen or heard anything. I promise I have been keeping my eyes out, but, y’know, I’ve been so busy with the shop stuff-and I’m still workin’ on the new arm…so…

D: …Kanu…

D: You can’t go forgetting why you’re up there. They’re important to you, to us. If we don’t find out what happened…then…then.

K: …I know. Sorry, Denchu.

K: I wish you could come see…It’s been so nice up here, I mean, I think you’d love it-

D: Kanu.

K: Maybe you should join me and we can look together-

D: Kanu. I can’t.

D: I have to be here in case they come back. Or else there won’t be anything for them to come back to, okay?

D: Even if they don’t…I have to hope that they might.

D: I don’t get it, Kanu. It’s unlike them to just. Leave. Something must have *happened*.

D: It’s so lonely…I miss everyone so much…I don’t know how much longer I can hold out…

K: Denchu…you’d better not be crying again…I’m gonna feel bad about not being there to comfort you.

D: Well, I am…I can’t help it…-sniff-

D: Nobody higher up wants to listen to me…or investigate…and I know something’s wrong and…and…

D: I can’t do anything about it…!!

D: I feel like it’a a miracle that I’m even talking to you right now.

D: …Sorry.

K: It’s okay, Denchu.

D: I just…I missed hearing your voice. I don’t know when I’ll get to hearing it again.

K: Though, if it’s in a few months, it might get deeper again.

D: Kanu!

K: What! It’s true!

D: Ha ha ha

K: Oop. I’ve just got a shipment of new parts. I gotta go

D: Aw…

D: Okay…Well…I’ll talk to you hopefully soon. I’ll miss you.

K: Okay. Love you.

D: Love you too.

D: And…if you feel like you don’t know what to do…you know where I’ll be.

D: …

D: How am I supposed to leave the only thing I’ve ever known?

#my art #comics #kanu #denchu #splatoon #splatoon ocs #THEY ARE SO (grips) #of course kanu cares about finding the others…but…he’s found his ways to enjoy life #denchu still wanting to get to the bottom of what happened and stay behind…being the last stand #hoping that at least if anyone were to return they would be there to greet them with open arms #but not knowing at all if anyone would come back for their own reasons #of course not because they Wanted to leave her behind but yknow. being left alone lets you wallow in those kinds of thoughts #DENCHUUUUUU #my ocs

[this-witch-writes]

Show Don't Tell - Part 2

part 1, part 3

Eddie didn’t understand what had happened or how quickly it had happened. So they’d fought. He’d been upset, Steve had been upset, but they had argued before. They were both opinionated, stubborn, a little bitchy, it was what made them click in some ways. How could Steve just… leave? Eddie was supposed to be the one who ran away. He read the note dozens of times trying to find some secret clue to make it make sense.

No matter how many times he went over it though, Steve’s note just didn’t make sense. “I hope you find someone someday that you love as much I love you now” what the fuck? How was Steve still so convinced Eddie didn’t love him? Convinced enough to skip town? He was probably just visiting Robin. He was coming back, right? On the drive home Eddie told himself again and again that he was overreacting. Steve was upset, he skipped town to see Robin and when he got back Eddie could yell at him for a while and then they’d fix things. Even if he still wasn’t sure how. He’d figure that out when Steve got back.

Wayne knew something was wrong the second Eddie stepped foot in the trailer. Eddie didn’t have to say a word and his uncle was giving him that soft concerned look and pulling out two beers.

‘Anything I need to know, son?’ And wasn’t actually being understood such a relief?

He didn’t really want to rehash everything so he just handed Wayne the note and started in on his beer. Wayne’s eyebrows did a lot of work in his face and that he took a long drink too. ‘So you and Steve split?’ He asked cautiously. ‘I thought things were going okay?’

Eddie sat up. ‘What? No! Why?’

Wayne’s eyebrows did some more complicated movements. ‘On account of this Dear John note you just handed me, kid? Is there more to the story?’

‘We just fought, that’s all.’

‘I don’t want to tell you your business, Ed, but this seems like some fight.’

‘He’s been a bit insecure, I guess, since Robin went away to college and the kids are busy at school. I try to cheer him up and most of the time it works great.’

‘I know,’ Wayne smiled, just a little. ‘Boy always looks like you’re the first person to ever cook him a hot meal.’

Eddie winced. ‘I think I am, his folks…’ no more really needed to be said there. Wayne got it. ‘Then yesterday I ask if he’s okay and he actually asks if I even love him? Can you believe that?’

‘You?!’ It was gratifying that Wayne was as surprised as Eddie.

‘Right!?’

‘That seems a mite more than a bit insecure, Eds, you dote on Steve.’ Wayne frowned. ‘More going on with that boy than he lets on, I suppose. What did you say to that?’

A second wince. ‘Well I blew up a bit. It just hurt, you know? Feeling like nothing I did was good enough.’

‘I’m not saying you’re wrong,’ Wayne handed the note back and tapped a nail on the glass of his beer bottle. ‘But it seems like whatever has Steve so upset, is bigger than what you give him. You can’t buy nobody’s happiness, though I’m sure his daddy tried.’

‘Yeah…’ Eddie slumped against the side of the couch. ‘I know… but it wasn’t like that. I wasn’t just giving him some gas station bouquet and calling it romance, Wayne. I did everything I could to make him happy and…’ he sniffed. ‘I just feel like I don’t have anything left.’

‘If he comes back,’ Wayne waved down Eddie immediate argument that of course he was coming back and kept talking over him. ‘If he comes back and you decide that you want to fix it, you can have that conversation then. If you want him back.’

‘If!!’ Eddie nearly knocked his beer over with his flailing. ‘Of course I want him back. What are you talking about? It’s Steve!’

‘You deserve someone who tells you that your love is good enough, not someone who skips town. I feel for Steve, I do, but you’re my kid and I say you deserve better than that.’ He pointed to the note. ‘It’s not your fault if he didn’t believe you saying you loved him.’

That tripped Eddie up a little and once again words weren’t needed between him and his uncle. Wayne frowned deeper. ‘You did tell him, right Ed?’

‘Of course I did,’ Eddie huffed, trying to remember. ‘We just don’t say it all the time.’ His voice was losing confidence though. He could remember Steve saying it, back in November and a few times before Christmas. He remember kissing him and talking and being happy, but Eddie’s memories were sparkling and slippery with lovesickness. He brushed the doubt away. ‘It’s like you and me. We don’t need to say it like we have something to prove. Show don’t tell.’ Wayne didn’t seem convinced by that explanation, which annoyed Eddie a little. ‘We’re not telling each other we love each other every day, you think I don’t love you? You’ve always let me know in real ways not words.’

‘We don’t say it much, true,’ Wayne nodded. ‘But kid, you never needed me to.’

‘Right!’ Eddie gestured at him in vindication. ‘Exactly!’

Wayne didn’t look convinced again. ‘Did Steve need you to?’

‘He shouldn’t.’

‘That aint always how it works. Folks need different things, Ed. You gotta hear them when they ask.’

-

Other chapters: Part 1, part 3

#steddie #steddie drabble #stranger things drabble #my fics #steddie angst #angst #steve harrington #eddie munson #wayne munson

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM BARBIE AS RAPUNZEL *  assorted dialogue from the 2002 film, adjust as necessary

what am i supposed to paint?

what if i don't have any good ideas?

you can create anything you imagine.

what if i hate it?

the woods were whispered to be full of monsters and dragons.

do you hear that? it's my stomach grumbling. i feel weak.

we wouldn't want anyone fainting around here.

one day, i'm going to walk along a beach just like this one and see nothing but open sky for miles and miles.

i'll put your art stuff away.

how was your ride today?

i'll expect my tea in nine minutes.

don't repeat your errors of yesterday.

what about your duties?

did you make the beds? sweep the floors? weed the garden?

it's your job to know.

i wonder where it goes.

something great could be down here.

you don't think there are spiders down there? 'cause i'm not too fond of spiders... or beetles... or snakes. i don't like them either.

oh sure. let's go down anyway.

nobody's been down here in years.

constant as the stars above, always know that you are loved.

why would she lie to me about that?

hurry, get cleaning!

i'm sorry, i was distracted.

will there be anything else?

how are we gonna fix this?

this is my chance. maybe... my only chance.

next time, i'll sit on you.

don't tell me you've been playing here all day.

does he ever smile?

just hold on, i'll get you!

just let go with one hand and reach up!

have we met before?

the only way to end the feud is through force.

i'd better make sure they're okay. i'll be right back.

how did it get so late?

tell me again about the village... and don't leave out a single detail.

the best part was... i met somebody.

and you've seen... how many men before?

this could ruin everything.

did we have a nice little trip today?

after all i've done, after all i've given you, this is how you repay me!

i heard you met someone special.

when i ask a question, i expect an answer.

you can't keep me locked away from the world forever.

when do you think this feud will end?

you're even more beautiful than i remember.

i'm going to be free.

just sounds like something following us.

it was only because of our extraordinary cunning and bravery that we escaped it all.

i hope you're wrong.

they may destroy each other sooner than i thought.

it's better than being a prisoner.

i hoped you might come back here. i realized i don't even know your name.

you're full of surprises.

there's your answer.

i'm not giving up.

you must be pretty important if you are invited to the prince's ball.

watch it with that thing! somebody could get seriously hurt!

any specific plan, or just general pain and anguish?

don't hurt him! it's me you want!

i'd rather read a good book.

she doesn't even know i'm the prince.

i'm waiting for someone.

i'm the one who's going to teach you not to meddle with my plans!

you're gonna let a little thing like that stop you!

i understand it is i who must thank you.

what makes might? it is more than power. it is also courage and loyalty.

you have never swerved in your devotion to your friend, no matter the danger.

it's so beautiful up here!

so again, we meet at a ball.

i came to clean up some loose ends.

you loved me! i know you did!

you could have had so much! you should've loved me!

you don't know what love is!

i forgive you for all those years.

no more hatred, please.

i thought you were gone forever.

all those years i thought i was alone.

i wronged you all these years.

i hope someday you can find it it in your heart to forgive me.

#rp meme #rp memes #rp prompt #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay prompt #ask meme #ask memes #roleplay inbox prompts #roleplay meme #writing prompt #rp asks #inbox prompts #inbox prompt #rp inbox meme #inbox meme #sentence starter #sentence starters #sentence starter prompt #mcflymemes #barbie #barbie as rapunzel

[bluejaysandblackbats]

Five Little Ducks

Fandom: DC Comics, Batman

Summary: Bruce finds a magically de-aged Jason.

Chapters: 5/13

Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Stephanie Brown, Duke Thomas, Zatanna Zatara

Additional Tags: De-Aged Jason Todd, Magic, Babysitting, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff and Angst, POV Third Person, Bruce Wayne is Not Okay, Bruce Wayne Tries, Jason Todd Has Issues, Childhood Trauma

Chapter Five: Borda

Jason knocked on Bruce's door at two in the morning. Bruce groaned, forgetting Jason was seven years old, and he answered the door. He was so exhausted he never thought to look down. "Mr. Wayne," Jason whispered, "I did a bad thing."

"Oh? What did you do?" Bruce questioned, still not opening his eyes.

"I threw up," Jason mumbled. Bruce blinked hard and looked down at Jason. Jason had a greenish pallor, and his eyes were red and puffy.

"You threw up... That's alright. Are you done?" Bruce questioned. He was still half-asleep.

"I threw up on the rug," Jason mumbled. Bruce reached for Jason's hand, and Jason flinched.

"I'm not gonna hit you. Do you wanna be picked up?" Bruce questioned. Jason rubbed his eyes and nodded. Bruce scooped him up and rubbed his back. "I'm sorry that you got sick."

"I can clean it up... I was just-. I-. I got scared that I'd get lost," Jason stammered.

"You don't have to do that," Bruce whispered. Bruce imagined Jason's eyes were puffy because he probably fretted over the mess, crying out of fear of punishment. "Accidents happen, Jason... Okay?" Jason hid his face in Bruce's shoulder as they entered the room. Bruce turned the light on to assess the situation, and he nodded. Sure, enough, there was a little clear puddle in the center of the rug.

"I'm sorry," Jason whimpered. Bruce held the back of Jason's head in his palm and put some bounce in his step as he walked to the hall closet to grab the cleaning supplies.

"It's alright... It's nothing little baking soda and seltzer can't fix," Bruce whispered, "Jason, I've gotta put you down now-."

"Just a little bit longer... Please," Jason whispered. Bruce nodded and bounced from one side to the other. It was so hard to remember that Jason wasn't a baby. He was so small and easy to hold onto. Easy to hold onto. Jason hadn't been easy to hold onto in years. For years they'd been caught up in a violent struggle of push and pull. It felt good just this once to be needed. "Nobody picks me up anymore..."

"Well, I'll pick you up anytime you want," Bruce promised, "I don't care how big you get... I'll always try-." His voice broke. Bruce was bombarded with images from Jason's death. He took a steadying breath, and after a few moments, Jason pulled away.

"You can put me down if you want... I'm tired now," Jason whispered. Bruce nodded and tucked Jason into bed. Then, he tended to the mess on the rug. Jason lay on his side, staring at Bruce. "Mr. Wayne... I really am sorry," Jason apologized again.

"It's alright... Do you feel better?" Bruce questioned. Jason nodded. "That's all that matters..."

"Is Dick your son too?" Jason asked. Bruce nodded. "Why did he go away?"

"He had to go home... He doesn't live here anymore," Bruce explained. Jason blinked hard.

"You live all by yourself?" Jason questioned. Bruce nodded. "Aren't you lonely?"

"Sometimes," Bruce answered as he finished cleaning up. "I'll be right back." He put everything where it belonged and returned to Jason's room.

Jason waved at Bruce. "My dad told me a scary story the other night because he was mad at me... He said his dad told him the same story," Jason whispered.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Bruce questioned. Jason nodded.

"My mommy says if something's scary, sometimes you have to tell the story to someone else so that it won't worry me anymore," Jason explained.

"Alright," Bruce replied.

"Can you turn the light on first?" Jason asked. Bruce nodded and turned on the lamp with a remote. "If it's foggy, I'm not supposed to walk to school unless he's with me... But I went anyway because it was library day. So, when he got home from work, I wasn't there. He grabbed and shook me, and I wanted to cry, but I didn't." Bruce nodded.

"Did he take you to school?" Bruce asked. Jason shook his head.

"He told me kids shouldn't go out in the fog without their mommies and daddies because of the Borda. Do you know what that is?" Jason questioned. Bruce shook his head. "She's a scary witch with a blindfold that kills kids with ropes for going where they're not supposed to." Bruce nodded.

"Were you upset when he told you that?" Bruce questioned. Jason nodded.

"But he didn't stay mad... I told him I was sorry, and he took me home. We played the lock game, and he got his money back from our neighbor," Jason replied.

"What's the lock game?" Bruce asked.

"We played it in our building... Sometimes he'd forget things in people's apartments, so he showed me how to unlock doors with different stuff, so we don't have to bother anybody," Jason explained, "I can unlock a door in less than a minute."

It took everything in Bruce's power to hold a straight face. He was furious. How could Willis trick a child as sweet and innocent as that into breaking and entering into apartments? And Jason was none the wiser. "What's the matter?" Jason questioned. Bruce shook his head. He knew Jason had to learn to steal from someone, but he had no idea this was how it all started.

"Did you play any other games with Willis?" Bruce replied.

"Um... The police game. Mommy didn't like that one," Jason replied, "I had to sit in the car when he'd go shopping and honk the horn when I saw police. I have to smile and wave at the police, and if they stop and wave at me, I win."

Bruce swallowed hard. "You don't play checkers or anything like that with him?" Bruce questioned.

"Oh," Jason yawned, "Sometimes he'd play the drums on my stomach while dinner cooked... I like that one. It's my favorite."

Bruce made a soft noise as Jason closed his eyes. "Any other games?" Bruce asked.

"It wasn't a game, but when he reads-. When he used to read the paper, he would let me hold one side while he held the other... I liked it because he always gave me a kiss instead of telling me to turn the page," Jason replied. Bruce kissed Jason's forehead.

"Thank you for sharing your stories with me," Bruce whispered.

"Thank you for holding me," Jason mumbled. Bruce tried not to seem sad, but he couldn't help but feel pain in the pit of his stomach. Willis's love for Jason was there, but it was selfish. Jason accepted that as it was. Jason accepted scraps of love when he deserved much more. Jason deserved the world, and even Bruce failed to give that to him.

#fic #five little ducks fic #Jason Todd #Bruce Wayne #Dick Grayson #Stephanie Brown #Duke Thomas #Zatanna Zatara #De-Aged Jason Todd #Magic #Babysitting #Father-Son Relationship #Fluff and Angst #POV Third Person #Bruce Wayne is Not Okay #Bruce Wayne Tries #Jason Todd Has Issues #Childhood Trauma #dc comics #batfam #angst and fluff #angst with a happy ending

[queerbuckleys]

WITH YOU I SERVE, WITH YOU I FALL [1.2k | spec fic | eddie pov] {ao3} part one

a/n: well, i did not expect this to happen..but here we are, please enjoy but you dream of some epiphany from eddie's perspective, aka what the real world looks like. title from epiphany by taylor swift. enjoy!

There are moments in life when things slow down. When you can know what’s going to happen as you watch in slow motion. Sometimes it’s happening to you. and sometimes to others. The nature of being a firefighter is you see those moments a lot. Both versions. Eddie had his fair share of them. 

One moment he’s on the ground watching Buck doing what he does best. And then he’s watching as the outline of his body flails, and then hangs, suspended in the air. 

“Buck!” he hears his own voice clamor through the rain. He can’t take his eyes off Buck's body, dangling, limbs limp. It reminds him of a stained glass in his childhood church. 

“Cap, we gotta get him down. Please. How do we get him down?” his mind is finally catching up with what just happened as each fact rolls over him. They have ten minutes. The ladder is electrified. They have ten minutes. And nobody is moving. He's still up there. 40 feet away. Harness tight around his thighs, bearing all his weight. With blood nowhere to go. 

“I'll go up,” he offers blindly. 

“What? So I can have both of you in the hospital electrocuted?” Bobby fixes him with a look, “We’ll get him down.” 

“Bobby, we are running out of time, he could d—,” there’s acid at the back of his throat, “You don’t think he’s already—?” 

“Eddie, no one thinks he’s dead. but we have to do this safely. I am not losing anyone tonight, okay?” 

He nods. And his eyes go back to Buck. He can’t move anymore. 

He’s not entirely sure how they do it. How they get him back to the ground. But he still can’t move as Hen and Chimney wrap a c-collar around his neck and work to get his heart back into rhythm, get him breathing. He’s not breathing. 

Still all he can do is stand and watch. Praying for the first time in years. 

You spared me, spare him too. 

“I have a steady rhythm.” 

“Let's move guys.” 

He’s pulled into the ambulance, Bobby meeting his eyes as he closes the doors and slams them shut. 

His eyes land on Buck’s hands, carefully placed one on top of the other, pale from a lack of oxygen, wet cold. 

His hand hovers, tracking the line of his body until it lands on his still face. Cheeks waned, brow perfectly neutral. 

Chimney looks up at him, laryngoscope poised. 

“Do it.” is all he can say. Chimney never asked, and he doesn’t have the authority really but he knows the question. It's better this time. It'll work this time. 

You didn’t spare her. Spare him for our sake. 

He finally wraps a hand around Buck's and continues his silent prayer. 

He’s not sure how he lets go. How he watches them take him beyond the doors. 

He’s inside, Bobby's hand on his elbow. 

“Eddie, why don’t we go to the chapel together.” 

It’s not actually a question, so he follows. 

They sit. Bobby prays. He prays in all the ways that he remembers.

Spare him. For our sake. Spare him.

“Wh-what happens now?” he finally asks. Because this part he’s never done before. 

“You go home.” 

He looks up dumbfounded. 

“You go home, and wait because waiting here is the same. And you tell Chris. And find comfort in each other. Because Buck is Chris’ person besides you. He’s your person.” 

Eddie swallows, “I've— I've never had someone like him. I don’t— I don’t know what I would—I thought I knew with her,” he swallows again, “but this feels—“ 

“It’s okay not to know it all right now.  Just remember how important he is to you. Whatever that may mean.”

The rain continues to pelt against the stained glass, artificial light streaming in, covering the altar in dappled colors. 

It feels strange, leaving the building without him. 

--

“Hey dad, where’s Buck?” 

Because it’s Friday night. Buck was supposed to be here. Sitting on the couch, bringing a beer to his lips while they playfully argue over pizza toppings and movies. 

“Hi bud,” Chris looks up, his eyes wide with that knowing look that no kid his age should have. He sits on the bed. He doesn’t know how Buck did this. 

“Chris, there was an accident while we were at work, and Buck. Buck got hurt. He's in the hospital right now. And he’s going to be alright. He just— has to sleep for a while, so his body can recover.” 

“Like you did?” 

“Yeah, a little bit like that. But— Chris, it could be longer. We don’t know. But you know Buck, right? He doesn’t give up.” 

Chris nods and leans into him. And that’s how they stay until eventually Chris nods off. and Eddie lifts him and tucks him into bed. 

He makes his way to his room. The one now indelibly filled with Buck, his touch entombed in the walls. The throw pillows and the plant that he had encouraged Eddie to buy, never forcing him but telling him it would look nice and it would fit in the new room that they repaired together. 

They built this home together. In more ways than one. 

The next few days are a weird routine. Eddie goes to the hospital, he takes Chris Saturday morning. 

Sunday afternoon he walks up the path from the parking lot and finds Maddie standing with a cup of coffee staring after a car with Pennsylvania plates. 

“Maddie?” 

“They— they wouldn’t even come inside. It's been three days, and— I really thought that maybe this time. After— he’s only ever tried to make them see him. But they aren’t going to change.” 

He takes one of her hands and runs a soothing thumb over her knuckles. “He doesn't need them. He has us.” 

“I'm really glad he has you and Chris.” 

“Well, thank you. We wouldn’t have him if it weren’t for you.” 

There’s a hint of a watery smile as she tilts her head toward the doors and they head inside. 

He’s not even sure how many hours later it is. Maddie went home squeezing his shoulder as she left. He can stay, Chris spending the night with Hen and Karen. So he stays. 

His eyes wander over Buck’s body, perfectly still. His brow is still neutral. Pale. 

“I don’t know if you can hear me. If you were awake you would probably rattle off the statistics. But nevertheless, I need you to come home. Please.” He lets his finger wander to the Lichtenberg figure that has begun to spread further below the sleeve of his hospital gown. He had heard about them before. How they were created within billionths of a second or over years. How one thing can change your body down the line. How one decision is the linchpin. 

He thanks the God that he’s been praying to that he made all the right ones that lead him here. Despite every struggle. That he gets to be here, in this life, with Buck by his side. Whatever that may mean.  The hand around his grabs tight, and it’s a shock to his system. Buck looks terrified as tears pool in his eyes. 

“Hey, you’re okay,” and it feels warm in his chest as he takes a breath with Buck. Wiping a tear from his cheek. 

He barely remembers hitting the call button, but soon they’re not alone. Just Buck’s eyes fixed to his across the room among the chaos. 

Whatever that may mean.  Home. 

#911 #buddie #eddie diaz #aj writes stuff #usermoonlight #userbuckleyhans #tuserksn #tusercourty #userceecee #useroliii #useryb #userweres

[faterpresources]

Sᴘɪᴅᴇʀ-Mᴀɴ : Aᴄʀᴏss ᴛʜᴇ Sᴘɪᴅᴇʀ-Vᴇʀsᴇ (2023) - Pᴀʀᴛ 1

A collection of random lines compiled from the Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023) Feel free to change the pronouns in order to better suit the parts involved.

❝ Is the song over? ❞

❝ Will you adopt me? ❞

❝ I don't feel grown up. ❞

❝ God, I need a raise. ❞

❝ You hit me with a bagel! ❞

❝ I've hit a lot of different villains with a lot of different food! ❞

❝ Do you speak Italian? ❞

❝ I am basically an adult! ❞

❝ You don't even have a driver's license! ❞

❝ We saved the multiverse! ❞

❝ I'm telling ya, I can feel it. ❞

❝ Okay. Knock yourself out. ❞

❝ I'm going to rob your face! ❞

❝ Just breathe. We got you. ❞

❝ Great. Is this your goose? ❞

❝ I don't know how to fix this. ❞

❝ I'm from another dimension. ❞

❝ Everything's gonna be okay. ❞

❝ You leave... everybody leaves. ❞

❝ I've leveled up my whole thing! ❞

❝ I can hear you being quiet, ___. ❞

❝ Oh, wow. Is this curry powder? ❞

❝ This should be simple enough. ❞

❝ I just saved a bunch of people! ❞

❝ For you, it's just a Tuesday night. ❞

❝ I'm not your guy/girl in the chair. ❞

❝ I think they look great, I dunno. ❞

❝ Sir, please! Just let me rob you! ❞

❝ This job is so dumb sometimes! ❞

❝ Okay, let's do this one last time. ❞

❝ Is this... that... dangerous mask? ❞

❝ Did you order the cake for tonight? ❞

❝ We're talking about it, aren't we? ❞

❝ He/She's really corny. But so hot! ❞

❝ Having a story at all seems gross. ❞

❝ He/She... kicked his/her own butt. ❞

❝ How's the manhunt for me going? ❞

❝ You don't look like a good guy/girl! ❞

❝ Branding was never my strong suit.❞

❝ Let's do things differently this time. ❞

❝ Hey, where'd the goose come from? ❞

❝ Maybe he/she didn't have a choice. ❞

❝ We'll say I'm a scientist. I was. I am! ❞

❝ I'm going to put my head in that hole. ❞

❝ Can't have your cake and eat it, too. ❞

❝ Unless you bake two cakes! ❞

❝ Uh... I don't wanna argue about this. ❞

❝ Alright, no politics at the dinner table. ❞

❝ I didn't wanna hurt him/her. But I did. ❞

❝ Well... why are you saying it like that? ❞

❝ I thought I knew the rest, but...I didn't. ❞

❝ How long have you been lying to me? ❞

❝ I really would've come to see you sooner. ❞

❝ Who laughs in the middle of a fight? ❞

❝ You think you know the rest. You don't. ❞

❝ What? How many of these did you take? ❞

❝ Hey, don't try to wow me with big words. ❞

❝ We're gonna need all the help we can get. ❞

❝ I'm just trying to lighten the mood, y'know...? ❞

❝ So, you want me to handle this one, or...? ❞

❝ I don't think I want this costume anymore. ❞

❝ Yeah, I don't know what any of that means. ❞

❝ Well, screaming their name usually works. ❞

❝ You're just gonna have to shut up and trust- ❞

❝ That's your story! Now, just stick to the script. ❞

❝ Ohh, I'll take the mic. No more mics for you. ❞

❝ Yeah, I'm smiling like it's a joke, but it's true. ❞

❝ What cursed world have you brought me to? ❞

❝ I never really made another friend, after that. ❞

❝ Who are you running around with, anyway? ❞

❝ What'd you call me? You realize I'm right here. ❞

❝ Ohh, this here is why nobody likes us, man. ❞

❝ Why would anyone be scared to talk to me?! ❞

❝ Hey, it's New York. Everyone's got their thing. ❞

❝ Never did come up with a cool name for that... ❞

❝ I joined it so I could hit my feelings with sticks! ❞

❝ I'm just... a really emotionally intelligent guy/girl. ❞

❝ Why wear a mask if you've got nothing to hide? ❞

❝ Nothing is more important than management. ❞

❝ I'm sorry, who exactly are you supposed to be? ❞

❝ Your costume's too tight in the back, by the way! ❞

❝ Oh, yeah. That sounds like a really good fake job. ❞

❝ You're in this to help people, right? Right? So am I! ❞

❝ Bad guy/girl? He/She's barely a villain of the week! ❞

❝ Sounds like he maybe shouldn't practice medicine. ❞

❝ You know, it really is always so great to talk to you. ❞

❝ I didn't join a band so I could talk about my feelings! ❞

❝ What do you mean I don't know that? I do know that. ❞

❝ Take a good look at my great fire from my backpack! ❞

❝ The power of the multiverse in the palm of my hand. ❞

❝ How much longer can I keep lying about who really I am? ❞

❝ Which is it? Hands in the air, or get down on the ground? ❞

❝ Dude/girl, you don't hang out, and you don't wanna talk... ❞

❝ It's really fun cleaning up your shocking mess, by the way. ❞

❝ I mean... how many people can you talk to about this stuff? ❞

❝ I was actually considered handsome, by scientist standards. ❞

❝ It was inconsiderate and super rude! ...And a little cocky... oof! ❞

❝ I wouldn't play with fire, dude/girl, you're kind of made of paper! ❞

❝ Can't you just act like a regular super villain so I can catch you? ❞

❝ Yo, if you don't tell someone what's going on you're gonna snap.  ❞

❝ He/She hasn't always had it easy. And he/she's not the only one. ❞

❝ You're acting like weird stuff like this happens to you all the time. ❞

❝ I lead an elite strike force dedicated to the security of the multiverse. ❞

❝ I always wanted to be in a band. Guess I just never found the right one. ❞

❝ Can we focus on the big fire-breathing threat to time and space, please?! ❞

❝ I've never robbed anybody in my life, please don't make this a bad experience for me! ❞

❝ Can you stop talking about your holes? You're making everyone uncomfortable over here. ❞

❝ I mean, it's more of a meta-commentary on what we call art, but it's... it...it's also...art? ❞

❝ Look, there is a big flying turkey from the renaissance I have to bring to justice, so if you don't mind. ❞

❝ Now I'm stuck putting everybody back where they belong before all of time and space collapses! ❞

❝ You left a hole wide enough for guys/girls like him/her to randomly get shot into the wrong dimension! ❞

#spider-verse #across the spider verse #spider man #spider-man #spiderman #rp meme #roleplay meme #roleplay ask meme #rp ask meme #ask meme #sentence starters #writing prompts #dialogue prompt #original

[olderthannetfic]

Are age gaps always a bad thing? Is it possible to be at a different 'level' from someone else your own literal age?

I'm 21 but I really don't feel it. Many of my friends are very mature and know what they're doing with their lives but I don't. I feel several years behind everyone else and, in terms of experience, I am. I got out of a cult that forbade a lot of normal teen stuff and tried to have more experiences, then covid hit and my pre-existing health condition-having self avoided people like the plague. I worry that by the time I feel ready for a relationship, everyone my age will be too far ahead of me.

One of my friends is 19. They dated a 17 year old. This is the kinda relationship antis start shit over when it's fictional. I think it's probably fine - I can believe that a 17yo is a bit more mature and a 19yo is a bit more immature. But some of my friends seem bothered by it so I'm not sure what I should think.

What is normal and okay?

--

Many people feel out of step with their supposed peers. Age gaps aren't inherently bad, but I don't necessarily think they're the answer to feeling out of step.

What is normal and okay are relationships that are healthy for the people involved. These are relationships that respect boundaries and provide support and positive feelings for both/all parties. That's how you judge health, not absolute metrics like age.

I'm sorry I can't give you a clear-cut rule. I know how difficult it is to just "trust your gut" if your instincts were honed in a cult. Your internal compass is all wonky. (You'd be surprised how many people I know who were raised in cults.)

17 and 19 is commonplace. It's only in the rarefied atmosphere of tumblr and such that people think it's a problem. I have no idea if your friends' relationship is healthy or not without knowing them.

For you at 21, I get feeling behind, but I wouldn't go for someone significantly younger, personally. If you're in college, dating another college student makes sense, but I wouldn't date anyone not yet in college.

Instead, I would look for other people who also feel out of step. Hell, I might look for someone older who's gone through what you're going through. It's not only cults that do it: an illness or a tragedy in the family can put people "behind" in similar ways. Neurotic perfectionist types also just tend to feel behind because they think they should have it all figured out by now.

But nobody actually has it figured out. Sorry.

It's fine to go sow some wild oats and recreate some of the teen experiences that you missed, but don't imagine that even people with "regular" adolescences all had the Hollywood version of everything. Sometimes, you imagine you're missing out on a lot more than you actually are. It's not about the experiences: it's about your feelings of incompleteness. Sometimes, you fix it by going out and getting those experiences. Sometimes, you fix it by working on the feeling themselves.

I do think there can be ages where it feels like everyone else is getting married and doesn't want to go out partying or like everyone settled down before you and nobody worth having is left when you want to settle down yourself, but that shit tends to be in your late 30s, and it's still a mistake to take a general tendency as a rule for your own life. Plenty of individual people settle down or still want to party at any age.

21 is a tough age because every year or two feels like a huge gap. But even by 25 and certainly by 30, it stops being like that. There just isn't that much difference between a bunch of adult coworkers. I know plenty of people who got together with somebody 20 years older but who was a hobby or work peer. And sure, occasionally, it's some old person creeping on nubile young things because they're a jackass, but just as often, it's reasonable adults connecting because they have things in common.

Most people's 40s are a fuckton better than their 20s, no matter what media tells you. Tumblr is full of people wondering when the lies on TV will come true in their 20-something lives. The pandemic derailed so many people's plans too. You're much less alone than it feels.

It's normal to feel at sea in a world that's on fire. Give it a couple of years, dude. Nobody has it figured out anyway, but especially nobody has it figured out in 2022.

[clockwork-sparrow]

Tales from the Frost

Stories following the conclusion of the RP Arc, TOWER.

Stories: [1] 2 3 4

Live your Todays

Sitting on Alvarium’s walls is a girl and standing behind that girl is a man. They’re only three years apart but that’s what it feels like to Gloria, sometimes. Everyone’s got jobs, hooked up, had kids, and croaked while she remained stuck in some mental, teenage purgatory of rebellion, discovery, and petty angst. Gloria pulls her coat tighter around herself and shivers from the cold.

“Fuck. You’ve always been skinny but now, you’re like a skeleton,” Florus says. He rests his hands on her shoulders and gives her a comforting squeeze. “…Stiff like one, too.”

“Piss off. Like you’re one to talk,” Gloria pouts.

“Hey, what’s worse? Sticking to meal replacements or doing whatever the hell fad you’re onto now?” Florus says. “Paleo, keto, activated charcoal. Wasn’t there a month where you only ate kale?”

“Kale is good! Not that you’d know, you tasteless prick.”

“Oh, fuck. Really got me there.”

Gloria snorts. Get stung enough times and you learn to ignore it. Besides, if Florus wasn’t being a little shit, then it’d be even more off putting at this point. Bantering like this reminds her of the old days; years of living normal lives, having normal wants, worrying about normal things. It’s behind them like a memory now, locked away by the horrors they survived and the loss they carry. Maybe she would have rather stayed in her middling, small-minded purgatory for a little while longer. It wasn’t so bad in hindsight. Gloria sniffs and hugs herself even tighter.

“Hey. I, uh.” Florus kneels down and takes a seat next to her. He keeps one arm wrapped around her shoulder. “You good?”

Gloria sends Florus a simmering glare because, like, of course not?! So why’s he even asking? As if anyone could be good after being barfed out of Final Days (and more)! Florus sucks in his lips and nods awkwardly to himself.

“I mean, yeah. Sorry. I know you’re not good. You’ve got literal roots tangled in your nerves and flowers coming out of your lungs and —“ Florus stops with a cringe. “…yeah. Sorry. Not good.”

“God, you suck at comforting people,” Gloria groans. “Where’s Ollie when you need him?”

“I don’t know. Dead, I guess?”

“Florus.”

“Sorry. I’m...” coping. He doesn’t say it.

Florus shifts uncomfortably in place and decides not to mention that his hallucination of Ollie is shaking his head no at him. He pulls Gloria closer and tensely breathes out.

“I’m sorry. Of all the people who should’ve lived, it should’ve been him,” he admits in a whisper.

“...What? And you shouldn’t have?!”

“Gloria, I’m not -- No. I don’t know what to tell you.”

“Well, figure it out or shut the fuck up! You think I can handle you dying too?” Grief balloons in her chest, hot and near bursting. “God, I don’t even know how much time I have left. What the hell am I supposed to do? Where’s all this supposed to go?”

Florus swallows. It’s like his heart’s tied in a double knot and he can’t get anything out, can’t do anything right, but Gloria’s crying and he feels like crying, too. He tucks her face into the crux of his neck and presses his lips into the crown of her head.

“I don’t know, Gloria. I really don’t,” he mutters.

Gloria huffs grumpily.

“But nobody knows how much time they have left. You could get hit by a car and then, it doesn’t matter that you have some fucked up, plant cancer.”

“Great. Wow! I feel so much better.”

“Ugh, okay. Look. It’s not like you can pause life until everything is perfect. We’re living right now, so we have to live right -fucking- now, because we don’t know if we have it good or if things will get worse again.” Florus inhales deeply. “...But you’re alive. And I’m alive. And...yeah. It’s not over for us yet.”

There’s another heavy silence. Eventually, Gloria shuffles deeper into Florus’s arms and groans tiredly into his chest.

“You became such a sap while you were away, Flo.”

“You’re welcome.”

They laugh quietly. Gloria tries to fix her runny makeup, but no amount of fussing can undo tears. This is just how she looks now.

“...God, I really thought you were dead,” she mumbles.

“Me too.”

“Mm.”

And then, a dull absence. Florus and Gloria are both waiting for a third voice to chime in. The snow comes down hard; he can barely see the distant mountains now. Canyons, like scars, like rips in the landscape, in himself and in Gloria. There’s a hole where their friend should be. A hole, and a grave.

Florus wipes a streak of running mascara off of Gloria’s cheek.

“Let’s visit Ollie one day.”

#ff14 rp #Gloria Jen Gallus #Florus Jen Celsus #Tales from the Frost

[quietwings-fics]

shed your fears, your tears, your pride

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Archive Warning: N/A Fandom: Our Flag Means Death Ship: Gen (with minor stede/ed & pete/lucius, + implications of future stede/ed/izzy) Additional Tags: Israel Hands Lives, Post-Season/Series 02, Fix-It, Near Death Experiences, Families of Choice, Minor Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Minor Black Pete/Lucius Spriggs, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Israel Hands-centric, Pre-Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Israel Hands, Injury Recovery, Angst and Humor, Canon Disabled Character Wordcount: 1602 Summary:

Israel Hands is okay with dying. That doesn’t mean he should.

Izzy closes his eyes on the deck of the the Revenge, and he doesn’t expect to open them again.

So, it’s a bit of a shock when he does. There’s light unapologetically beating at his eyelids, turning his vision to dark red instead of black. He turns away from it, but can’t escape, only lay his cheek against something too soft. He scowls at it.

This must be Hell, then. Hell smells like Stede Bonnet. Figures.

He rolls his head the other way and slowly raises his heavy eyelids. There’s crud sticking to his eyelashes. He blinks a few times trying to knock it off. He groans as he takes in the world around him. Hell even *looks* like Bonnet’s cabin because his torture is never-ending, even in death. The devil is probably a blond, cheerful twat.

He tries to raise a hand to wipe his eyes off, but it comes up sluggishly and the movement sends pain radiating through his abdomen. He struggles to drag it up anyway, ignoring how much it hurts, until another hand falls on top of his own and lowers it back to the bed. “Could you stop doing that? You sound like a zombie.” Izzy growls in the back of his throat, but there’s a familiar weight behind the touch that stills him. He peers down at it as his vision sharpens to pick out the details of a spider tattoo.

“You aren’t supposed to be here,” he tells Ed.

“That’s rude. You were dying in my arms. You want me to wait outside and hope you’ll get better? What if you’d stopped breathing in the middle of the night, and I wasn’t-“ Izzy rolls his head to the side. Ed looks exhausted, even as he slows down and swallows. He pats Izzy’s wrist before drawing his hand away. Izzy strangles the tiny noise that wants to crawl out of his throat when he can’t feel Ed’s skin against his anymore.

“You’re supposed to be alive.” This is supposed to be Izzy’s afterlife. Who gave Ed the right to gatecrash? (Besides Izzy himself, in every way, for years and years.)

“I am.” Ed makes a sound that gets close to a laugh, pulls the crinkles around his eyes up the right way but doesn’t quite have the breath behind it to last. “And so are you. Not that you didn’t fight it, you… Izzy.” Izzy squints at him.

“I bled out,” he spits. Ed shrugs.

“You have a lot of blood.”

“I was shot.”

“Who hasn’t been? They got you on the left, no harm- A little harm done. Nothing unsalvageable.”

“I gave you a speech!” Izzy’s near shouting now, though Ed isn’t getting any louder to match him. His throat stings from at least a few days' disuse. It hurts getting the air in his lungs, but he struggles through anyway.

“And it was all very moving, mate, but you didn’t have to die to make a point,” Ed says. Izzy exhales painfully and lays flat back against the pillows again. His bullet wound is twinging. It nearly covers up the smell of the sheets, but there’s still that impossible to escape reminder of Bonnet lingering around. If Izzy could swat it out of the air, he would, but Ed’s right about one thing. Lifting his arm was a bad idea. Moving at all makes things worse.

“You didn’t need me anymore. I was ready to go.” Hell would be easier, he decides, than having to live, to see Ed’s face crumple when he says that before he can pick it up again.

“Who cares if I need you?” Izzy cares.

“The crew-“

“You’re part of the crew.” That shuts him up. He wants to say that he isn’t. He shouldn’t be. He belongs on the fringes, understanding they have something together that he can never be a part of, not really, but being willing to die to protect it for them. Not for himself. Just for them to have something good.

He’d been pretending that was still true since he’d sung for them. That was meant to be it, a moment in that warm glow for one last song before he was supposed to go back to his kennel.

“You know, what you said-“

“Please, don’t,” Izzy says miserably.

“Too late. Should have bled out faster if you didn’t want to have this conversation.”

“Believe me, I tried,” Izzy mutters.

“I’m glad you didn’t,” Ed says. “You would have died thinking this was all your fault, that you… made me into Blackbeard.”

“Didn’t I?”

“I fed you your own toes, Iz.” Ed grimaces. “The point is, Blackbeard was a two person operation. We made him, and we killed him together, sort of.” Ed reaches out, and Izzy watches his hand approach warily. His fingers brush the scar on Izzy’s forehead, a gentle back and forth along the first of two reminders that death won’t be getting its hands on Izzy any time soon. It still aches a little, like the pins and needles from where the leg he lost was, like he's sure he's going to feel in his gut for the rest of his life every time he moves a little too fast. But they're all only scars, or will be, and scars can be survived, outlived until they fade, not forgotten but quieter.

Ed’s still touching it when Bonnet tries to sneak in, poorly. He’s having a little difficulty between the creaking floorboards and the wooden leg he’s carrying. The hoof knocks against the doorway. Izzy glares at him, but he’s a little too tired for it to have the sting he wants behind it. It’s more like a greeting at this point, anyway. Some men shake hands, and some men look at each other like they’d try for murder at the first opportunity despite all evidence to the contrary.

Does he owe his life to Stede Bonnet now?

No. Absolutely not. He can’t go on like this.

“Um, hi,” Bonnet says. The hoof knocks into the wall again as he turns a little. “He’s awake. Good.”

“Fuck off, Bonnet,” Izzy says and hates with every fiber of his being that it sounds even a little bit endeared. He gives Bonnet a growl for good measure.

“Don’t mind him. Bark’s worse than his bite,” Ed says. He brushes his thumb over Izzy’s scar one last time before he turns to face his… What are they now? Still co-captains? Ed ran off, but he’s back now and Bonnet always leaves a spot empty beside him for his boyfriend. Ed smiles, and it isn’t even directed at Izzy but he still feels warm under its presence. He obviously lost more blood than they thought, not enough to go to his brain and keep him thinking straight. “You finished?”

“Well, we finished. A little scrub and touch-up from every part of the crew, and it’s good as new.” Bonnet presents the leg. It’s shinier than it was before. Polished.

“You bled all over your leg,” Ed confides in Izzy. “Totally ruined the paint job. I suggested we melt down some treasure, cover it in real gold, but apparently, that would be too heavy.”

“I need to use it to walk,” Izzy deadpans.

“I’m aware of that,” Ed says, with the voice of someone who definitely forgot that the leg had a practical use when he got caught up trying to decorate it. “I just wanted you to have something nice when you woke up.” Bonnet is approaching the bed. His bed. Fuck, they laid him up in- Did they even wash the sheets? Air them out a little? Izzy’s trying not to think about any of that.

The leg makes a clunk as Bonnet sets it down and takes a seat next to Ed. They both stare at him expectantly.

It makes Izzy uncomfortable.

“What?” he demands.

“Do you feel okay? Feverish? Any-“

“Fuck off, Bonnet.” Still with that awful charmed note in his voice. Someone make him stop sounding like that.

Stede laughs. Izzy turns his head back to the window in protest.

He can hear the waves rolling against the ship. He can hear footsteps thudding through wood far above their heads. He can, mostly, hear Stede talking now, and he just knows that if he looks back over at the two of them, Ed’s going to be wearing the most sickening, besotted expression Izzy has ever seen on anyone’s face.

And he’s going to have to live with that.

It’s… it’s not a terrible prospect, on the other side of a gut wound that didn’t take.

“-and we can finally go through with the wedding. The two of them have been driving us up the wall with the tiny details the longer we had to wait for you to-“ Stede is saying.

“Wedding?” Izzy interrupts.

“Of Lucius and Black Pete,” Stede says. “You didn’t think we’d go through with it without you?”

Ed coughs. He whispers, very badly because Izzy can hear him, he’s right there, to Stede, “I think he probably did.” Stede makes a noise a little like air escaping from a broken accordion.

“Don’t tell me you need me to walk someone down the aisle,” Izzy says.

“Actually, Lucius did-“ Stede starts up again, and he begins laying out everything about the wedding they’ve been planning while Izzy was unconscious.

Izzy can’t turn around to face them now. He’s got to get his damn face to stop smiling without him telling it to.

Cunts, all of them.

The kind Izzy would die for.

The kind that won’t let him.

#fanfiction #1001-5000 #teen and up audiences #ofmd #genfic #ed & izzy #izzy & stede #izzy hands #stede bonnet #ed teach #fix-it

[the-6th-harbringer]

RELATIONSHIPS

About Wanderer [@wandering-hat-guy ] -First Encounter "When I first interacted with him, I was disappointed, because I thought that is what I was going to become. In all honesty, I thought he was weak. I have been proven wrong." -Fixing "I was surprised that he willingly fixed me in the desert. I expected him to simply leave me to die- or not show up at all." "Hm? You're asking if I can fix myself?" "I can.. but I'm not very good. Blame Dottore."

-The Gnosis Fight "Part of me is glad he interfered, but part of me wishes he didn't."

-Home "I see him as my brother now. Wherever he calls home, I call home too." "Or I suppose you can say he is my home." -The Promise "Don't worry, I'll be keeping that promise. I'm not one to go back on things like that." {I betrayed him. He's going to hate me.} -Memories "So it never really happened after all. Well, that's a relief."

About Kabukimono [ @ask-kabukimono ]

-General Hatred "It's simply self-loathing. Don't worry about it."

-The Gnosis "It better do some good with that Gnosis. If not, I'll come and take it back." -Disappearance "..." "If I ever feel the need to break my promise to Wanderer, I'll do it quietly where no one can stop me."

-The Fourth "What a stupid decision. Guess I still have reason to hate it after all." About Menthe and Other Melusines [ @melusine-summons ] -Menthe "I'm glad she found me in that bubble that day. Wouldn't be here without her." -Her Family "She has a lot of sisters, and I've forgotten a lot of their names. However, I still care for them. They're too nice for you to not love them."

About Estrella and Lyn [ @ask-lyn-n-estrella ] -Doll [Estrella] "I use doll as an insult quite frequently. Him being a doll makes it kind of hard to use that as an insult. I feel rude by doing so." "He also gives me strange vibes. I am unsure why."

-Kickable [Lyn] "I could gently tap him and he'd fall over and shatter like a mirror. How amusing."

About Astris [ @ask-astris-celeste ] -Outsider "Kinda like you. Not from this world, yet seemingly fits right in."

About The Not-Cat [ @adi-cat-anon ] -Risk "That thing is powerful. If it isn't careful, it'll catch the eyes of a certain doctor. Kabukimono better take care of it." About Cyrille [ @cyrille-leclair-de-fontaine ] -Apology "I feel bad for leaving him in Fontaine with all those other bastards just to attempt to disappear on my own selfish accord. I didn't even tell him." "..Hm. He probably wouldn't have cared anyways."

-Hinadori "He has to balance taking care of Hinadori and taking care of himself. If he doesn't, I will have an issue."

-Time bomb "..Why is he so insistent that I'm not a ticking bomb of destruction?" -Love? "..It shouldn't be possible. And yet.." "I guess its not too bad."

-Love

"If only it didn't hurt him so much to love me."

About Sakura [ @the-tainted-blossom ]

-Mother "Good riddance to that beast."

-Home Realm "I think that's where my consciousness was transported when I fell asleep. It's not a happy place in there." "I never, ever want to go back there."

-Mother II : Speech "'To mess with time is to mess with the world. And you, my children, have now broken the world beyond repair. If this plane of existence were to downfall.. blame it on nobody but your pathetic selves.'" "Those were her final words. Bit over the top, no?" -Victims "Sakura was probably in the same boat as me at some point. I feel bad for them, genuinely." -Saved "..."

BONUS LINES: About the Vision - Irony "The second I gave away the Gnosis, my original heart, I was greeted with a new heart. And it just happened to be electro as well. What are the chances?" -Separation "The vision is the thing that has separated me and my brother's identities. I am no longer just an extension of him."

#scara kinnie moment #will b updated if necessary!

[fleur-de-violette]

Fire keeper

AO3

Summary:

There are very few examples in history of people actually sharing a devil fruit, but the most common theory is that the one who takes the first bite gains the power, as well as the curse.

There is, however, a lesser known legend, that stipulates that while the former is true, two people who shared a devil fruit are forever linked. They either die together, or not at all.

Or: Deuce is there in Marineford. Things turn out differently.

Note:  

Am I trying to go through all the “what could have gone differently” about Marineford? There is nothing you can prove.

Warning for imminent death and grief, and some free interpretation of the lore. Hope you’ll enjoy the story!  -

“Hey… Somebody… He needs a doctor.”

Luffy’s voice barely gets out, in contrast with his usual loud tone.

There is blood everywhere, and Ace’s body is heavy on his, but it will be alright. It has to be.

Ace promised, after all. So, he would be okay. With some rest, some food, and a lot of love, he would be okay. There was no alternative.

“Luffy. Please, listen to me. It’s too late.”

Ace’s arm starts to slip on him, and he does his best to keep it in place. “No, no no no, don’t talk like that. We’re going to find you a doctor, and…”

Nobody is moving. It’s like the world has stopped, and people are looking at them in pity, and Luffy doesn’t do well with pity. He never did. He’s an active person. When he sees someone in pain, he doesn’t pity them: he acts to make things better.

Ace is probably in pain right now. He’s probably been in pain for a long time, and Luffy doesn’t know how to fix this. He needs help, he needs a doctor, and no one seems to be doing anything.

Some part of him thinks absentmindedly that if Chopper were there, he would already be working on Ace’s wound. But he’s not here, is he? Stashed away with the rest of Luffy’s crew. His crew he was supposed to protect.

Robin’s eyes will forever be engraved in his brain. He told her he would protect her, and she trusted him. He told them he would protect them, he promised. And yet…

But Ace is different. Ace is not him, and he will keep his promise. Because Ace is reckless and a bit stupid, he has a hard time controlling his feelings and he can be a bit of an asshole, but he keeps his promises.

Big brothers do that, after all.

But Ace’s arm keeps weakening on him, and all of sudden he feels cold, so cold, and he needs Ace to half hug him and tell him everything is going to be okay.

He needs the warmth of his brother’s fire, and everything is so, so cold.

“Please, I can’t…”

He can’t. He can’t do it on his own, he can’t be left alone, being alone is terrifying, it’s worse than being in pain. Because the world is big -so, so big- and that’s usually something he says with awe, but right now it seems too big, too cold to be alone in.

He knows it, he’s not stupid, or, maybe he is, a little, but he is self-aware enough to realize that he’s selfish. He’s loud and he imposes himself on people and he fights to keep them, he fights for them, but it’s not for them, not really. He’s just so, so scared of being left alone.

He will take the pain. He will take the pain a hundred times if it means not being alone.

“Of course, you can. You’re strong. You’re so strong and I’m so proud to call you my brother.”

This is not what Luffy wants to hear. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care if Ace is proud or not. He doesn’t even care if Ace hates him, if it means he’s still here.

It’s selfish, maybe, but who cares? He’s in so much pain, and soon, he will be all alone in this world. Can’t he be a little selfish?

“My only regret,” Ace’s voice is barely above a whisper now, “is that I won’t be able to see you fulfill your dream.”

“Don’t say that,” Luffy repeats, because what more can he say? He will fulfill his dream. And then he will come back to Ace to brag. Because Ace hates being the son of the previous Pirate king, but maybe, just maybe, he will be proud to call the next one his brother. But for that, he has to be there. He has to stay there, no matter how much it hurts, no matter how hard it is. He promised.

“Don’t leave me alone.” Luffy doesn’t care if he’s pitiful, he doesn’t care if Ace calls him weak or a crybaby afterwards.

There is a soft, weak laugh next to his head. “Come on. You’re not alone. Don’t you have a crew waiting for you? You made incredible friends, so you won’t ever be alone.”

Ace coughs, and something wet and warm falls on Luffy’s shoulder. “And neither am I. You came, you all came. Someone like me, who is good for nothing…”

Luffy wants to correct him, not let him deprecate himself with his last words, but he doesn’t dare say anything. Ace is crying now, and he doesn’t want to cut him off. Not now.

“Thank you, for loving me.”

And then…

Nothing.

The word shuts down. Everything becomes dark and cold.

In a small corner of his mind, Luffy realizes this is the end. He failed. Ace is dead. But this feeling, as painful as it is, is swallowed beneath the immensity of the nothingness.

He’s just cold. He’s just, so very cold. He’s been to winter islands, he’s climbed a mountain during a snowstorm carrying both Sanji and Nami on his back, and yet he’s never been this cold in his entire life.  

He’s so cold.

Until, slowly, gradually, he starts to feel warmth.

On his back, his chest, around his shoulder, he starts feeling something warm. There is a light, so small, that brings him back to the present.

Ace’s body is on fire.

“Ace?”

He picks him up, manhandles him so he can get a better look at the injury. He barely notices that the fire isn’t burning him, just gently warming his ice-cold skin.

Ace blinks back at him. He’s still covered in blood, there are tears tracks on his face, but he’s there. The flames had covered the horrible wound on his chest.

“What?”

Luffy slowly becomes aware of his surroundings again. The general feeling in Marineford seems to be the same one as the one Ace and him are feeling: confusion.

Luffy isn’t one to pass on a blessing, but he saw Ace die. And now his brother is burning. This is little too much for his exhausted brain.

Taking advantage of the general puzzlement, someone comes up to them. Luffy initially tenses when the unknown man enters the careful bubble where they are sitting, but Ace seems to relax when he sees him.

The guy has shoulder length blue hair and a mask on his face. He’s tall, but doesn’t seem built like a fighter. He’s wearing expensive looking clothing.

He’s also, and that’s maybe the most noticeable thing, on fire.

Like Ace, he doesn’t look distressed by the flames. He just looks like he has no idea what’s going on either.  

Ace jumps in his arms, like he had suddenly remembered something important.

“Ah, I need to introduce you. Luffy, this is my ex-first lieutenant and crewmate Deuce. Deuce, this is Luffy, my little brother. I told you a lot about him.”

Luffy extends the hand that is not holding Ace toward Deuce, not ready to let go of his brother just yet.

“Nice to meet you.”

Deuce shakes his hand, still looking confused. “Nice to meet you… wait, now is not the time to make introductions!” His face colors slightly in red as he screams, and something in him reminds Luffy of Nami or Zoro when they reprimand him. “Do you know what’s going on?”

Ace shakes his head. “They shared a devil fruit,” says someone, probably a Whitebeard pirate, somewhere. Luffy blinks. What does that have to do with everything?

“When two people share a devil fruit, the most common theory is that the person who took the first bite gains the power, and the curse.” Luffy turns toward Ivankov, who just talked. “But there is another theory, the idea that sharing the cursed fruit links the fates of the ones who do. That they die together… or not at all.”  

Deuce seems to think about it for a second. “That’s got to come with a price,” he says, more to himself than to anyone else. “All miracles do.”

Ace looks at him with wide eyes and Deuce seems to realize what he just said, he swallows and says with a forced smile, “But we will deal with it, right? Nothing can stop us. Spades pirates, right? Or, not really, now, I guess, but-”

“Deuce.”

Ace is talking more to the ground than to his friend, and Luffy can’t help but tighten his grip on him a little. “I’m sorry, I got you involved in this. I got you linked with me forever and I-”

Deuce falls to his knee next to them and takes Ace’s head with his still burning hands. “You don’t get it, do you?”

Ace doesn’t say anything and Luffy just stays there, feeling like he will interrupt something if he talks, but also not ready to completely let go yet.

Deuce takes a deep breath, before letting it go. “I love you. I love you. I always did and I’ll repeat it as much as I need. You didn’t get me involved in anything. I do the things I do, I keep on following you, not because you made me do it, but because I chose to. I follow you because I love you. I never told you, I never found the words, I didn’t want to mess it up, but now I realize I should have said it. I should have said it so many times. I love you. I thought you would realize it, I thought you would notice, but that’s like expecting a fire to notice the moths gathering around it.”

“Please don’t call yourself a moth,” says Ace weakly, his voice a little wet.    

“But that’s what it is, isn’t it? You just keep going, and you never stop, you don’t think about the people around you, you don’t think about me, and please, don’t start apologizing now, because you never apologized for anything you did to me. You know, I had a plan, I knew what I was going to do with my life, but then you had to come and destroy it. You made me a pirate; you made me who I am. I was no one, and you made me. You think you linked us when we shared that fruit? That’s wrong. You linked us the second you set foot on that island. You came into my life without knocking and you made yourself at home in my heart, and you gave me a name, and then I blinked, and you were gone, further away, faster and faster in the way of your life, as if you were rushing toward its end, and I couldn’t stop you. I couldn’t catch you, and the thing is, I didn’t even want to.

You know, I have never fallen in love before, all my knowledge came from books, so I thought that when you love someone, there is a part of you that wants to hold them, to possess them. But I never felt that way. Because I knew, I always knew, you aren’t someone who can be caught. So, I just accepted it, I accepted that I’d stay in the big shadow you cast, and I wouldn’t not try to hold you, try to catch you, because that would be like trying to catch the sun itself. And just now, I felt like I had lost my light, and that I’ve been powerless to stop you from extinguishing, and I realized… After everything, I never told you. So, here we are. I love you. And you don’t have to say anything back, because I know you, and I know you won’t stop for me. But, I love you.”

Deuce gets his burning hand in front of his face. “And, no matter the consequences, I am so glad we got a second chance.”  

All three of them just stays there in silence for a while, before Ace open his mouth, closes it, and opens it again to say, “Deuce-”

“I’m sorry to interrupt your moment,” says a voice above them and Luffy turns his head to see the phoenix-pineapple guy standing there. “But this is still a battlefield, and we need to get out of here. Now.”  

There’s a movement, and Luffy feels himself being lifted from the ground, held tightly by Ace’s arm. A strong Talon is clenched on his brother’s shoulder. All three of them, still tightly interlocked, are being lifted into the air by the phoenix, and for a second Luffy allows himself to forget everything about the events of the past few weeks to just enjoy the feeling of flying.

But it only lasts one second and then they hit the deck of a boat, and the phoenix guy leaves, probably to get some more people to safety.

Luffy stays there, sitting on a boat, for a moment. Now that they are all safe, he can feel his body relaxing.

He blinks. The ship is rocking. Everything is blurry.

He let himself fall back on the wooden deck.

“Luffy!!”

Suddenly, Ace’s face is in front of his, eyes wide in worry.

“It’s okay,” he says, “it’s fine, I just need to sleep it off.”

“No, it’s not, you need- Who are you?”

There is apparently someone else on the ship, because Ace turns his back to him to put himself between him and the stranger. Now that he sees it, Ace is still bleeding. So, whatever happened healed him enough so his life wouldn’t be in danger, but didn’t heal him completely.

“I’m a doctor,” says a voice he might have heard before, but he can’t really remember at the moment. “Let me help him.”

Ace doesn’t move and Luffy can clearly hear him say, “Don’t come any closer! Don’t touch him!”

When he was a kid, he once tried to save an injured fox. Turns out she had pups, and even as he tried to help her, she would stay defensively in front of her hole.

He doesn’t know why he’s remembering that just right now. For now, he just closes his eyes.

-

He blinks. He’s on a bed. There are machines around him. He’s probably still on a ship.

“You’re awake,” says a voice above him. It’s the man from earlier, who said he was a doctor. Now, Luffy recognizes him; he was in Sabaody. Tra…something.

“Is Ace okay?” he asks. This is his first important question.

The man sighs. “Yes. I had to sedate him, but he’s okay.”

Now, for his second important question: “Can I have food?”  

That gets him a half smile. “Yes. Don’t move, and I’ll get you some.” The man stands up and slowly walks toward the door. Just as he reaches it, he asks, “Don’t you want to know why I saved you?”

Luffy just looks at him with blank eyes. The answer is obvious. “If it’s important, you’ll tell me.”

Again, he gets a half smile for his trouble. “That’s fair,” the man says before leaving.

Now, he knows this Tra-guy told him to stay here, but he’s not taking orders from him, and he’s not good at staying put, so about a minute after the door closes, he gets up and starts exploring.

Not long into his exploration of the ship, he runs into what he was looking for: the kitchen. Someone is there, eating. When he approaches, he recognizes him.

“Oh, hey, pineapple guy! Thank you for saving us.”    

“It’s Marco,” says the pineapple guy. “And shouldn’t you be in the infirmary?”

Luffy just shrugs and takes some of the food in front of him.

“Hey,” says the man without heat, “I was eating that.”

“So what? Don’t pirates take what they want?”

Marco groans. “Go ahead, then. After all, this will never be as good as…”

He trails off, and Luffy observes him for a second. “Are you okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Nothing for you to worry about, kid.”

After a few moments of silence where Luffy is eating and Marco is staring at nothing, he adds, “If it’s Ace you’re looking for, he and Deuce are in a room following this corridor.” He points toward said corridor.

“Are they okay?” Luffy asks.

Marco marks a short pause before answering, “Worried about you.”

“I see.”

He eats a bit more before asking, “And your old man?”

Marco looks at the ceiling and takes a long breath. “He’s still alive, yes. We have the Surgeon of Death to thank for that. Without him… I don’t like to owe a rookie, especially one that seems so eager to collect, but we didn’t have a choice. But again, nothing for you to worry about.”

He looks tired. But, as he says, there isn’t much Luffy can do about it, so he finishes his plate before standing up. “Alright, then. Thank you for the meal.”

“You stole from me,” says Marco as he walks toward the room the man showed him.

Ace is still asleep when he enters, and only Deuce rises to look at him.

“You’re awake,” he says.

“You guys slept together?” Luffy asks.

For some reason, that has Deuce turning red. “No, we didn’t… what?”

“I mean, you guys slept in the same bed.”

“Oh,” the man seems to regain his composure. “Yeah, yeah, that. It happened often when we started sailing and I guess we both needed the familiarity.”

Luffy lets himself fall on a chain near the bed, humming. “Thank you, for saving him.”

Deuce sighs. “I mean, I didn’t really-”

“You did.” He succeeded where Luffy failed. “It’s nice to know he has people like you looking out for him.”

Ace is sleeping, his face peaceful on the comforter, his back against Deuce, mouth half-open. If he were awake, he would probably mock Luffy for talking like this. Insisting that he was the oldest, and it was his job to worry about Luffy, not the other way around.

But he’s not awake, and it’s just Luffy and Deuce right now, so he can say it.

“I know my brother can be a lot to handle,” he says. “But take care of him for me, okay?”     

-

Hope you enjoyed the story! Many thanks to @ohmytoddhewitt for beta reading!!

#one piece #fanfiction #My writing #Portgas D. Ace #masked deuce #monkey d luffy #deuace

[velvetcinn]

I think about you sometimes. You were like my platonic soul mate. I've never said those words out loud but I felt them all these years. But being with you I felt safe. It wasn't, but it did. Sometimes I miss you. Sometimes I want to message you. What would we say after all these years. Have I forgiven you? Were we supposed to stay friends?

We would laugh at all the stupidest shit when we were teens. I get scared to say anything to you because there came a point when I couldn't trust you. Even now I wouldn't want you in the same room as the person I'm seeing. But I do miss you. I want to see if you're okay. But I don't know if I want you in my life. But I think we are still the same. I think maybe, if we saw each other again, we would just cry. Maybe we miss each other.

Because for a long time, you were my best friend. I've never been able to laugh with anyone how I used to laugh with you. Is it because I got older? More cynical? Why do I feel like you're the only one I can turn to when we haven't talked in 10 years.

Am I tired? Am I looking for you to help fix me? Am I being toxic? Do you need a friend? Do you miss me?

Were you who I thought you were? People pull the blindfold over my eyes time and time again, did I ever really see /you/? You always saw me though, I never felt like I had to hide from you. We would fight and make up months later. Everyone said you were a bad friend to me. Was I a bad friend to you? It's funny, I miss you more than anyone I dated. That's how good I felt our connection was, most of the time. I miss staying up so late and laughing at stupid shit, I still think of fishymoo and skitalios and our disgusting midnight food creation. Just typing that made me laugh and make my heart feel crushed simultaneously.

I think about the times you stopped talking to me for other people though, and stopped wanting to hang out with me. Never wanted to go do things together. Were you embarrassed of me? Those times still haunt me now. I'm scared of people leaving me for someone better so I don't bother making connections now. Even though it was my decision, losing you hurt. I thought losing you would help heal me. You left me so many times, I had to put a stop to it. I couldn't keep hurting. I'm trying to convince myself talking to you would be a bad idea.

How can I feel this way about our friendship and still feel like you didn't care in the end. It was so hard for me to let go.

But even now, when I feel so alone, I remember how you could feel like home. Nobody ever really gets me, but you did...I like to think at least.

I don't know. I am frozen. Once again I can't make a decision. Sometimes I wish you would reach out again. I'm too scared to make another choice I might regret... so again. I stand here waiting for life to happen to me,

Being passive and letting it make my choices for me.

But you are enough to make me have these thoughts and need to type them out. Tell someone, something, or even nobody at all but myself.

I know you won't see this ever, but I hope you'll be okay.