#i hope all the old gays feel very special | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

savagegood · 10 months

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@shinjiroatae1126: To all my fans, today was a very special day for me. For years, I struggled to accept a part of myself...But now, after all I have been through, I finally have the courage to open up to you about something. I am a gay man. It has taken me a long time to be able to say I am gay. I could not even say it to myself. However, I’ve come to realize it is better, both for me, and for the people I care about, including my fans, to live life authentically than to live a life never accepting who I truly am. I hope people who are struggling with the same feeling will find courage and know they are not alone.

ps, he’s released a new song, “into the light”, which you can watch here. part of the proceeds from the single will go to lgbtq+ organisations

@shinjiroatae1126: July 26th, 2023 was a big day for me. I finally gathered the courage to come out to the public as a gay man. I am grateful to have received media coverage from multiple platforms both within Japan and overseas.

To be honest, I was extremely anxious before all of this happened. However, I've been pleasantly surprised to discover the overwhelming amount of positive feedback pouring in from both my fans and people who have come across the news about me. It's heartwarming to see that my story is being acknowledged from all around the world, and this brings me immense joy. Although they may be baby steps, I sense that this world is gradually moving into the light. Yesterday, I made an announcement about resuming my career as an artist. I also released a new song titled “Into The Light”. The music video for the song is also on YouTube now. This song is packed with the emotions and thoughts leading up to this point, including my decision to come out. Living with anxieties and struggles is not limited to just LGBTQ+ individuals. I hope this song can be a source of encouragement for anyone carrying such emotions. I've aimed for it to become a song that can uplift those with similar feelings. A portion of the proceeds will be donated to Pride House Tokyo, Japan’s first permanent LGBTQ+ center, and ReBit, an organization providing resources and support for LGBTQ+ youth. I hope this song will touch many hearts.🙏🌈

At first, there was total silence. Then, there were shrieks, wild applause, weeping and shouts of “I love you!”

Fans of Shinjiro Atae, a J-pop idol who has been on a nearly two-year performance hiatus, had come to hear him talk about “the challenge of my life.” Standing onstage in a dark auditorium in front of 2,000 fans in central Tokyo on Wednesday night, he revealed something he has kept hidden for most of his life: He is gay.

“I respect you and believe you deserve to hear this directly from me,” he said, reading from a letter he had prepared. “For years, I struggled to accept a part of myself. But now, after all I have been through, I finally have the courage to open up to you about something. I am a gay man.”

Such an announcement is extremely unusual in conservative Japan, the only G7 country that has not legalized same-sex unions. Earlier this summer, the Japanese Parliament passed an L.G.B.T.Q rights bill but it had been watered down by the political right, stating that there “should be no unfair discrimination” against gay and transgender people.

In making a public declaration, the 34-year-old Mr. Atae, who spent two decades performing with AAA, a hit Japanese pop group, before embarking on a solo career, said he wanted his fans to know his true self. He also hopes to comfort those who might be grappling with anxieties about their sexuality.

“I don’t want people to struggle like me,” he said.

AAA debuted in 2005, with Mr. Atae, the youngest member, forgoing high school. He performed mostly as a dancer, and began appearing in TV series and movies.

His sexuality perplexed him. “It was a time when on TV, comedians would say two men kissing was gross,” he said. If anyone asked if he had a girlfriend, he just said he was too busy working.

Activists said they could not recall an instance when a Japanese pop star of his stature had publicly declared they were gay, because of anxieties about losing fans or sponsors.

“I think he has decided to come out in order to change Japan,” said Gon Matsunaka, a director and adviser to Pride House Tokyo, a support center for the gay and transgender community.

The decision to open up about his sexuality, he said, evolved over seven years of living in Los Angeles, where he saw how freely gay couples could show affection in public and built an extensive support network.

“Everyone was so open,” he said. “People would talk about their vulnerabilities. In Japan, people think it’s best not to talk about those things.”

Mr. Atae’s decision, he said, was not political. All he wanted, he said, was to “normalize” being gay. Coming out, he knew, would likely draw criticism. “Whatever you do, there will be haters,” he said. “I can only focus on the people I might be helping.”

#this made my week :')#please give his new song a listen and leave him a lovely comment on instagram #shinjiro atae #aaa #japan #jpop #queer #lgbt #lgbtq #gay #long post

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asuyaka · 6 months

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Eyyy it's been a while since I've requested anything, and since I'm back to my JJK brain rot how about a good old request for my favorite dead divorced gay couple?(how are we copin', manga readers?)

So idk if you've ever seen or heard of the "Missing Halloween" animation on YouTube, BUT--

What if satosugu found out that Reader(who they were very close with) was actually the spirit of an past special grade student that died in a mission by the hands of curse users (maybe they raided the school or something, idk it's like- 1AM in here my brain will not remember all the shit that happens in the JJK lore to make a coherent plot point) and now just roams around near the school, and that explains why everyone just seemingly ignored Reader's presence completely and gave the three weird looks whenever they hung out together. Also I like to think that these two idiots found out about reader's situation after fooling around during detention and accidentally tripping on some dusty old boxes that had some old stuff in it, finding one of those group school year pics from when Yaba was the boys' age and Reader was also in the pic from when they were still alive.

In much simpler words, Satosugu x ghost!reader that they didn't knew was a ghost until they found a picture of Reader's academic years.

-🌈, Anon.

★ - JJK brainrot 's so real f' me too !! (Satosugu once 'm get m grubby lil hands on you... >:(( )

☆ - Satosugu x Ghost! Reader !!

♡ - 's nice ta see you again, 🌈 nony !! ヾ(^▽^*))) hope you're doin' well <33 (´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡ | 'm have seen Missing Halloween! made me s'sad (◞‸◟；) but s sooo bittersweet! m nota huuugee animation fan, but Missing Halloween 's one of m favs! (๑≧▽≦)

Being a ghost is interesting, to put it simply.

You get to see things you never got the chance to when you were alive, like the top of Mount Fuji and the vast streets of Shibuya. Sure, you missed what it was like to eat your favorite food or speak to people, but it's the price you have to pay for your naivety.

You thought you'd be alone, wandering the hallways of Jujutsu High forever until they came.

Geto Suguru and Gojo Satoru.

The strongest sorcerers in the modern era.

Shock is an emotion you haven't felt since your death, but you feel it again when you notice that those two can not only see but touch you.

It's an odd feeling. Having someone touch your skin after years (it's only been two) of being dead. Weird, but nice.

"Suguru, back me up here!" Satoru whines, holding his friend by his shoulders and shaking him back and forth.

You and Satoru were arguing about which ice cream flavor was the best. Granted, you haven't had ice cream —or any food for that matter— in a long time, but there was no way you would let Satoru get away with saying Birthday Cake.

"This is your argument, and I like Vanilla." Suguru shrugs and the betrayed look on Satoru's face causes you to giggle.

Satoru turns to face you, chest out and voice boisterous. "Well, [Name], since we can't agree, I guess that means we'll have to go to an ice cream store to find out!

Suguru's face turns blank. "Where in that argument did going to an ice cream place happen?"

"Right now, duh." You huff, rolling your eyes dramatically.

"No, guys, I don't have money, and I'm not taking you dumbasses to an ice cream place at this hour." Suguru's voice is stern; like there's no room for back-and-forth bickering.

You three were now at a small ice cream shop a few minutes away from Jujutsu High.

You tried not to talk to Suguru and Satoru much, so to bystanders it wouldn't look like they were talking to literal air, but they didn't get the hint and kept talking to you anyway.

Sometimes you wonder if they even know you're a ghost.

The way Satoru uses you as a headrest (you're putting spiders in his bed tonight) and how Suguru tends to maintain eye contact when he talks to you (earning a couple of odd stares from some in the store), you’re 99.9% sure they think you’re a real person.

Which you are, obviously, but you’re only technically real to them. Why that is, you aren’t exactly sure yourself.

Before you three get to the counter, you make up a fake excuse of having to use the bathroom. You tell them the flavor you want, make sure Satoru doesn’t do anything weird, and order the flavor with the most sugar (you aren’t 100% sure if you can even eat but it’s worth trying) before you excuse yourself.

You make your way to the roof, sitting on the edge and looking out into the city. It’s calming.

You’ve always enjoyed how relaxing it was to be able to see people going about their lives, the soft breeze sounding through your ears accompanied by the smell of ice cream and bread from nearby stores.

It’s nice.

From the corner of your eye, you spot Suguru and Satoru sitting at an outside table. They were talking amongst each other as they presumably waited for you, an empty spot only held by a cup of ice cream filled with your favorite flavor.

You drop down at the back of the store, brushing the dust off your body and making your way to where Suguru and Satoru are sitting.

“Jeez! Took you long enough.” Satoru rolls his eyes and immediately starts eating his ice cream.

Suguru rolls his eyes. His posture is the same as always, a man spread and his arms crossed only breaking whenever he needs to eat his ice cream as well.

Huffing, you kick Satoru underneath the table. Blowing a raspberry before taking a bite of the ice cream.

Good news, you can eat.

Bad news, you don’t taste a single thing.

Well… they don’t need to know that. They’re having fun, your inability to taste shouldn’t spoil that for them.

“Satoru, Yaga’s going to kill us if he finds us, you know?” Suguru huffs, keeping watch as Satoru looks through the yearbook of past students in Jujutsu High.

“Oh, hush!” Satoru kicks him in the knee, gasping when he finds a book tucked away behind several (thankfully sleeping) cursed corpses.

Satoru grins. “Found one.”

Suguru takes one final glance at the hallway before turning to see what Satoru dragged him here for in the dead of night (or early in the morning depending on the way you look at it).

They flip through the yearbook, snickering when they see what Yaga looked like two years ago. His buzz is shorter — if that’s even possible — but he still has his stone-cold resting face.

They make it to the back of the book, where there’s a special section dedicated to students who died before the year is over.

Really, Satoru was looking for what [Name] looked like when he was younger. He’s suspected you were older than the two of them since he never sees you during school.

“Satoru… is– is that…?” Suguru’s voice is weary as his finger points at a photo of some dude he recognizes.

A boy he recognizes.

It’s your picture, you look the same as you do now. “What’s he doing here? We see him all the time– right Suguru?”

Suguru pales. “Is that why Shoko calls us crazy? [Name] isn’t alive—”

“Yes, he is!” Satoru almost yells. The book drops from his hands with a thump! small colors of blue peeking out from the bottom of his sunglasses.

“We can touch him, we can see him!” Satoru stomps his foot. “How is that possible if he’s dead, huh?!”

“He might be a cursed sp—”

“Then the curse alarm would’ve sounded!” Satoru’s voice sounds like it’s tethering over an edge. He’s confused– he’s known [Name] for as long as his first year, you, him, and Suguru are inseparable so why can Suguru accept the fact that you’re (supposedly) dead?!

“Let’s ask him then, is that okay?” Suguru puts his hand directly on Satoru’s shoulder, moving his thumb slightly for comfort.

The albino takes a deep breath to calm himself. He shouldn’t be mad at Suguru, he loves Suguru.

So, he does what Suguru says. He lets Suguru lead the way to where they found you the first time. Close to the artifact warehouse but closer to the forest that surrounds Jujutsu High.

You’re there. Sitting on the grass as you stare longingly at a bird.

The sound of rocks crunching under their feet must give them away because in a second you lock eyes with Suguru, a soft smile on your face.

“Suguru!” Your voice is warm– comforting even. “What are you guys doing here? Aren’t you guys breaking curfew?”

“Are you dead?”

Satoru’s blunt question causes your body to freeze. He sounds angry. Maybe it’s because you didn’t tell them that you were a ghost, and they somehow found out themselves.

You weren’t all that popular when you were alive. You were an adequate sorcerer with mediocre abilities. Nothing that puts you out there– not like the two in front of you anyway.

“Y-Yeah?” You avert your eyes sheepishly. “I mean, I died a few years ago so—”

“Why didn’t you tell us anything?” Satoru cuts you off, the hand still holding Suguru’s tightens slightly.

Why didn’t you tell them? Because they’d stop hanging out with you? Were you scared you’d lose the only people who know you’re still technically here?

Because you’re bound to this school and have only ever left because your attachment somehow shifted to Satoru and Suguru.

Ah, that’s why.

You were scared to be left alone. That’s why every time you could, you’d rush over to where they were. Engage in conversation with them, and do mildly illegal things with them because they make you feel wanted.

“I guess… I was scared you two would stop hanging out with me..?” You let out a laugh even though nothing is funny. “You two are the only people who know I still exist, so I thought if you figured out I was a ghost…”

“— that we’d stop talking to you altogether?” Suguru finishes for you and you can’t help but nod.

“That’s stupid! We fight curses, why do you think being a ghost is going to stop anything?!” Satoru grabs you by the shoulder. You’re sure his grip hurts, but you can’t exactly feel pain anymore.

“Yeah, I know…” Your hand touches Satoru’s forearm. “Now that you know… it doesn’t change anything between us… right?”

The longer the silence stretches the more anxiety swallows you whole. If they stop talking to you or start avoiding you, you aren’t sure what you’ll be bound to.

Maybe that spot by the artifact warehouse. You’ll be forced to stay there– alone, with no one to talk to, no one to make you feel alive.

“Of course, not.” Suguru’s voice is warm, it makes something well up in your eyes.

“Sure, it might be weird since sorcerers can’t see you, but you’re our friend. You just have to promise not to keep life-altering secrets from us. Right, Satoru?”

Satoru huffs, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes. “You owe me, stupid ghost boy!”

A smile stretches across your face and you’re unaware of the warmth rolling down your cheeks. “I’m glad.”

You won’t be alone.

You’ll be able to talk to them, now that they know your biggest secret.

You’ll have Satoru and Suguru, and they’ll have you.

Maybe being dead– or being a ghost isn’t so bad after all.

#writin' shit.#ANSWERED LETTERS—009 #jjk x male reader #male reader #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x male reader #geto x male reader #geto suguru #gojo satoru #suguru x male reader #satoru x male reader #x male reader #jjk #satosugu x reader #satosugu x male reader #🌈: anon!

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iridescentpull · 3 months

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Gatos e Rosas will be on hold for a week or so since I have a VERY busy week ahead of me and won't have time to write the new chapters.

As an apology, I did a thing on twitter that for every like the tweet received, I would post one fact about a character of the GeR universe (mainly fitpac ofc).

So here's part one of those facts, hope you enjoy :) lmk if you want more!

Ramón was adopted by Fit and Spreen when he was barely 3 years old

Pac lost his leg in an accident (will be explained in the story) when he was 19

Fit went to the army straight when he was fresh outta highschool, thinking he knew everything (he didn't)

Pac's amputation is an above knee one, also known as a transfemoral one

Phil and Missa are in a queerplatonic marriage

Tina works in the fashion industry and has dreams of owning her own boutique and line in the future

Quesadilla City is a small city in a fictional island located in the Northern Hemisphere

Ramón is autistic, and he goes nonverbal whenever he's extremely stressed or overstimulated. He and Fit communicate through sign language when that happens

Pac has diagnosed depression and anxiety and takes meds for it

Cellbit and Roier met when they were called to the school because Richas and Bobby had a fight

Fit figured out he was gay when he was in his teens, but didn't accept it until he was in his late twenties/early thirties

Roier does drag, aka Melissa

Quackity HATES Chayanne, and the feeling is mutual with Chayanne. Their hate-relationship started since Chayanne was a toddler

Missa works in a really famous orchestra, which means he often has to travel around for concerts, leaving his family behind for long periods of time

The first few weeks after Pac was alone in his new apartment for the first time, he fell into a rough depressive episode. He slowly got better after adopting Xereta

Ramón's special interest is the Krebs Cycle. Fit has no idea when, what, or how his son even learned what the krebs cycle is, but he's happy to listen Ramóns infodumps

After Pac and Mike immigrated from Brazil, Mike searched high and low for somewhere they could stay that would be cheap until they could get back on their feet. He met Bagi, who was searching for more roommates at the time. They moved in, and the Favela Five apartment was born

Death Family live in the more country side of the city, around the same area as Mike and Mine

Fit lost his arm up until the shoulder, also known as shoulder disarticulation

Pac and Mike met in the orphanage at Brazil when they were both seven and five, respectively

Fit and Phil met just when Fit was discharged and lived together as roommates until Phil met Missa

Quesadilla City is a VERY diverse city, with immigrants from all over the world having their little communities spread around. The Favela is one of the most popular communities, though!

Cellbit works at Ordo Theorita’s Publishing House, and he dreams of publishing his own thriller book in the future

Pac is transmasc, and had his top surgery in his midtwenties after the Favela Five managed to scrap enough money to pay for it

Ramón's biggest fear is his dad being lonely. His second biggest fear are heights

#GeR AU #qsmp au #fitpac #pactw #fitmc #qsmp ramon #aynee writes

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absolutebl · 2 years

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10 High Quality & Cinematic BLs

Ones that are very well made with a tight narrative and no cringey dialogue. For example: Old Fashion Cupcake or His. Japan knows what tf it’s doing, okay? You don’t come from a tradition that gave us Kurosawa and fail at broad scope cinematography.

High Quality & Cinematic BLs + Comfort & Joy

These are the ones that I love even though they’re artsy, but they also end happily and didn’t hurt me too much.

1. Old Fashion Cupcake

(Japan 2022 Viki)

This show had me from the moment they broke the egg yolk with the chopsticks in the opening credits for episode one. It’s about a younger man with a long cherished crush on his boss (ten years older and going through a mid life crisis) who decides to save and seduce said man with pancakes. It’s wholesome, comforting, sexy, and a very necessary narrative about still having hope, interests, and openness to affection at any age. It’s coming of age/queerness packaged in a subtle critique of expectations around masculinity and love and loneliness... and it’s beautiful. Full review.

2. Restart After Come Back Home

AKA Risutato wa tadaima no ato de (Japan 2020 grey)

Atmospheric study in rural Japan meets complex family dynamics built on a romance framework of city boy meets country boy. It’s beautiful and icy sweet. Slow moving in places but ultimately worth your patience. Full review here.

3. Life: Love on the Line

AKA Life Senjou no Bokura (Japan 2020 Viki)

This is a beautiful movie and a good BL, if a bit adult and gut wrenching at times. Goes through young love, break up, and reunion - but it’s actually a saga of self acceptance. You want the director’s cut. Like His, LLOTL is an exploration of suppression and the limits we impose on ourselves when we’re dishonest about who we love. In high school, serious and self contained Ito fell in love with Nishi, the manic pixie dream boy of the dream he didn’t know he had. Nishi, emotionally and mentally fragile, struggled to fit into the world. Ito, however, found it all too easy, except for the whole - ya know - gay thing. This movie is about Ito’s willingness to sacrifice not just himself but his love (and even Nishi himself) to social and familial expectations and the misery that results. It has a hard fought happy ending that then follows them through the rest of their lives in a (slightly unnecessary but welcome) epilogue montage.

4. A Tale of Thousand Stars

(Thai 2021 GMMTV YouTube)

With great casting and cinematography this drama nods at BL tropes but manages to elevate them (and itself) with a strong mature story concept about a spoiled rich kid who gets a heart transplant and becomes a teacher it order to pay out survivor’s guilt. On the way he falls in love with a local park ranger and contends with his own classism and escapist tendencies. Everyone seemed to perfectly suit their roles and GMMTV made the most out of its stable. Combined with excellent production (and post production) values, 1000 Stars is without question GMMTV’s most mature, charming, and smart BL series. I think it should go down as one of the top BLs of all time. I feel safe recommending this one to friends and non BL watchers.

High Quality & Cinematic BLs + Work & Angst

These are ones that I watched but were really difficult for me for personal reasons. Some may not have happy endings. I tend to call these moody arthouse smackdoodle. They like to pretend that "ambiguous" is somehow unique and special rather than bog standard commonplace for narratives of this type. Hold onto your psyche, these dramas will test you. But they very well done.

5. His the movie

(Japan 2020 Viki)

His is about being a grown adult and still struggling with coming out as gay. It addresses the consequences of life choices disingenuous to identity. Nagisa turns up on Shun’s doorstep with his precocious daughter in tow. This is a touch confusing to Shun since they were each others first love. Shun has retreated from society, rejecting the world before it can reject him, already brokenhearted because without Nagisa he never had a reason to fight. Nagisa went the opposite way, tried to pretend to be something he was not and ended up with a daughter he adores and a wife who hates him. This movie is beautiful and the setting is unique and interesting but I'm not wild about the ending.

6. I Told Sunset About You

(Thai 2020 grey)

I don’t have a ton to say about ITSAY because I’ve never managed to finished it. This one was too close to my own queer journey and it seriously messed with my head about 2/3 of the way through, so I stopped watching to protect myself. However, I can tell you that the production values are unreal for Thailand, using a soft lens, diffuse lighting, and a nostalgic atmosphere, paying close attention to framing, and forgetting neither background nor close-focus expressive detail. It’s a remarkable piece of work. I caught no mistakes in makeup, wardrobe, body positioning, reflection, or boom mic placement - so they clearly had continuity eyeballs during filming and on final product (which most Thai BLs don’t spring for). So yeah, the filming, directing, and acting is insanly good, but what’s really stand out in ITSAY from a film perspective is their smooth as butter invisibly perfect editing. Post production on this series must have been a BEAST.

7. Your Name Engraved Herein

(Taiwan 2020 Netflix)

This movie is fantastic but it is also seriously depressing, it’s a self acceptance journey, but if you wanna wallow in high quality acting and serious gay drama, this’ll do it.

8. Goodbye Mother AKA Thua Me Con D

(Vietnam 2019 Netflix)

Like YNEH or Dew, this is a great movie but it deals openly with homophobia, bashing, family trauma, and social acceptance.

9. His the series

AKA His - Koisuru Tsumori Nante Nakatta AKA I Didn’t Think I Would Fall In Love

(Japan 2019)

Boy goes to visit his absent father, ends up kinda homeless on the beach, gets adopted by local family, falls in love with the boy working and living with them. Lots of long drawn out glances.

10. I Want to See Only You

AKA Kimi no Koto Dake Mite Itai (Japan 2022 grey)

This is a beautiful piece of cinema well acted, about two boys who are opposite personalities and grew up together. Gifted and serious Sakura (Kura Yuki from His the series) and outgoing eccentric manic pixie dream boy, Yuma. It is very pretty and this is the kind of atmospheric elegantly performed BL that only really comes from Japan (complete with dead fish kisses - what you though Korea invented them? oh no). For me it was lovely but slightly unmemorable. Full review here.

More Like This From Japan

The Cornered Mouse Dreams of Cheese AKA Kyuso wa Chizu no Yume wo Miru (Japan 2020) - obsession, cheating, breakup, reunion, then break up again, explicit.

Does the Flower Bloom? (Japan 2018) - May/December romance about an artist student, the house he inherits from his dead parents. and all the people around him who are obsessed with him, including an older man.

Junjou: Pure Heart (Japan 2010) - I shoudl probably rewatch this one, it’s been a while.

Silhouette of Your Voice AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan 2017) - It’s not as good as any of us wanted given the beautiful glory of the original manga (I Hear the Sunspot). Also it doesn’t really end happily. Disappointing.

Eternal Yesterday AKA Eien no Kino (Japan 2022 Gaga) - After Mitsuru’s cheerful outgoing boyfriend Koichi is killed but stay’s walking around, everyone else begins to forget about him. Mitsuru recalls their romance while trying to understand what’s going on, hold onto his love, and come to terms with loss and identity. Sad and creepy but somehow still beautiful, Japan spending all its pennies on pain.

Darker BLs and more thoughts on Moody Arthouse Smackdoodle here.

Tangential blogs posts:

10 Best Uses of Cinematic Storytelling in BL

Top 10 Highest Production Values in Thai BL

Some Noodling on BL Production Houses & Studios

This post the result of an ask from @theklutzymaniac, updated end of 2022.

(source)

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zoeykallus · 10 months

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Hey hey A friend of mine's birthday is coming up and they just came out as gay so in honor of there B-day and there coming out I would like to request Male!Reader with the Bad Batch (+Five's and Rex) like maybe it's the first time they become attracted to a guy and at first they don't understand there feelings until there hands touch or Reader says something/does something for them and it's almost instant that the realization hits them our boys they are in love with reader how reader and the boys get together is up to you

🎉HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX YOU TURD I HOPE THIS MAKES YOU FEEL SPECIAL LOVE YOU 🎉

Okay, a birthday you say... I'm picking this out of my list to do first, because you didn't say when this birthday is. If I keep it in the queue of my request to-do list, this would probably have to wait at least 6 - 8 weeks, because of all the other stuff I would have to get through first. So let's do this now... 😅💪🏻

I started writing and things happened. Most scenarios are first meeting and falling in love scenarios. Took me long enough to write all this 😅 I hope it's to your liking.

Happy Birthday, Alex! 🌹

The Bad Batch/Fives/Rex x Male!Reader HCs - What Is This Feeling?

Fluff/Implied Romance

______________________

Hunter

You met the first time through work, the second time and the third time too. You found out that you like each other and decided to meet occasionally again. Sometimes for an ale, sometimes for a caf, sometimes for a barbecue with the rest of his squad.

Today you're sitting in the park, caf- to- go in hand, watching the passers-by as you talk. "How's Tech doing?" you ask with genuine concern, remembering that Hunter's brother had a bad fall and almost died on the last mission. You know how incredibly worried he had been. Hunter flashes you a cautious smile, ravishingly attractive as always, and you feel your insides grow warm. "Better, Baccta is a gift from the gods," Hunter replies, and you can see his relief. "So he's getting back on his feet?" Hunter nods. "Yes, it will take a few more days, but Tech will be back to his old self soon". You smile, also relieved. You like his brothers, even the communicative, know-it-all Tech. He's quite cute in his own way. Your caf cups are practically empty at the same time. As you're about to get up to throw your cup into the trash can nearby, Hunter suddenly grabs your cup, touching your hand. A shiver runs down your spine, but one of the good kind, the kind that sends tingles throughout your body and wakes up the swarm of butterflies in your stomach. "Let me do it," he says quietly, taking the cup from your hand.

For a long second, you look each other right in the eye, and you lose yourself in his. When Hunter finally takes the cup and moves to the trash can, you have to blink several times to come back down to earth. You would so love to know how Hunter sees you, what he thinks and feels when he's close to you like he was just now, but you don't dare ask. He sits down next to you again, this time a little closer. Suddenly, you hear him say softly, "Your heart is beating very fast." In a hint of panic, your heart picks up the pace again. You see him looking at you out of the corner of your eye, but you don't dare turn your head to look at his striking face. "I didn't know your senses were so sharp," you say softly. You hear the smirk in his voice as he says, "You can't hide much from me, I thought you knew that." Feeling silly, you finally force yourself to look at him and immediately feel your knees buckle as he smiles at you and are thankful you are already seated. "Mine's beating pretty fast, too," he says suddenly, avoiding your gaze. You blink in surprise. "Oh yeah?" you ask curiously. "Yes. And honestly it confused me for a while, because it always happens when we meet and somehow get closer."

You swallow nervously, so delighted by this statement that your hands shake a little, and you fold them precariously in your lap, so he won't see. Hunter continues, "I haven't thought much about anything like dating and everything that goes with it. Working as a soldier, living as a soldier, doesn't leave much room for a personal life. But that's probably how most clones feel." You listen to him intently, hanging on every word he says, waiting for him to tell you his conclusion. "The clones that I know of that are dating all have female partners or love affairs. As clones, we are never really told about all these things. It took me a while to understand what that feeling is that I get when you're around me." You laugh softly, "Because I'm male?" Hunter scratches the back of his head with a smirk. "Yeah. I mean... that must sound stupid to you. I hope you'll forgive my awkwardness." You say softly, "There's nothing to forgive, Hunter."

He looks at you, his gaze testing, cautious, and yet also challenging. "So I'm just going to come right out and say it, I have a crush on you and I have no idea how to deal with it". You sit up a little straighter, your heart pounding, your eyes meet, and you ask, "How would you like to handle it?" You can see him swallow before he says almost in a whisper, "I'd like to get closer to you, get to know you even better, spend more time with you." His hand gently reaches for yours, and he looks down at your fingers intertwining. When he hears your voice, he looks up again, and you get lost in his eyes. You say, "I'd love that".

Echo

He's so sweet, and he doesn't even know it, you think with a smile as he hands you the ice cream he bought. It's almost unbearably hot, and you've found a place in the shade. The rest of Clone Force 99 is out on the town. You say, more or less amused as well as reproving, "I can't believe I let you talk me into accompanying you to Tatooine. I hate that planet." Echo smiles wryly and says, "Apparently you can't turn me down that easily." You roll your eyes and nudge him. "I'm here because you said you needed me to translate, so far I haven't translated anything". Echo hastily eats his ice cream that is about to melt and says, "I can't help it if our contact didn't show up. Now we have a day off. That's not bad either." "A day off is nice. But on Tatooine?" you say critically. He shrugs and says, "We'll take what we can get." You laugh softly and say, "I'd have to agree with you there. It's not like I'm not enjoying my time with you."

Echo pauses and looks at you. There is some chocolate in the corner of his mouth, and as if it were perfectly natural, you take a clean handkerchief from your pocket and clean the corner of his mouth. He holds still, blinks once or twice, but doesn't say a word. He's still staring at you, and only now do you notice how lost he suddenly seems. "You like spending time with me?" he finally asks after what feels like an eternity. You hesitate, for a moment you are not sure if you want to open up to him, make yourself vulnerable. But you answer him softly, "Yes." Echo clears his throat, smiles. You could swear a soft blush creeps into his cheeks. "Do you like spending time with me?" you suddenly ask more boldly than you feel, asking almost hastily, afraid that your courage might leave you in mid-sentence. He blinks several times, his eyes widen, but he nods and says, "Yes, very much." Your heart beats faster, your pulse races. That look on his face, he seems so innocent and helpless, you don't know whether to feel sorry, laugh or cuddle him. "Is that why you asked me to come?" Echo swallows, his eyes darting back and forth nervously.

"Echo?" He sighs, "Okay, yeah." "And you talked Hunter and the others into going along with this?" Echo smiles crookedly again and nods. "Well, after our last mission together, I suddenly felt so lost when you left. It took me a while to understand that feeling, in fact Hunter helped." A little nervously, you look at him. "Your brothers don't have a problem with it?" Echo blinks and frowns questioningly. "What would they have a problem with?" You laugh nervously and say, "Well, that you're dragging the whole squad to Tatooine for a guy they barely know. Why Tatooine of all places?"

Echo laughs and says, "Crosshair wasn't so keen at first, but he was outvoted. And I thought if I chose a romantic planet, my little ruse might be noticed." You get all warm as he casually places his hand over yours, but his words elicit a grin. "So you were trying to trick me". "I wouldn't call it that" Echo says innocently, "I was just looking for an excuse to spend time alone with you" As his lips gently touch your cheek, your heart does a joyful leap. You say softly as you look him in the eye, "Tatooine isn't so bad after all."

Wrecker

You guide him through the archives. The giant from Clone Force 99 they call Wrecker. He's looking for certain documents, but has gotten lost twice now in the sprawling, confusing corridors and finally asked you for help. After all, this is your work area, at least it has been for a couple of weeks. He's been here a few times in that time, but so far he hasn't needed your help. "Thank you," he says a bit meekly as he follows you, "I don't know what's going on here at all." You smirk and say over your shoulder, "Understandable. Very few people can find their way around here" You move through the maze of hallways until you reach your destination. As you are about to leave him alone, he suddenly says, "Um, would you mind staying until I'm done? I'm not sure I can find my way out on my own." He scratches the back of his head with a wry smile. Somehow he's incredibly cute, as big and strong as he is, he seems like a genuinely sweet soul. "Sure," you say with a smile, "take your time." "Cool, thanks!" Wrecker looks at some data, muttering softly to himself, sighing a time or two, then puts the data card back. "So, found what you were looking for?" you ask kindly.

He nods. "Yeah, I guess." You raise your eyebrows and say, "Apparently you're not happy with it?" Wrecker laughs softly and says, "It's a long story and not that important." Unsure of what to make of this information, you shrug and begin to lead him back out. When you reach the end, he accidentally bumps into you. You almost fall to the ground, but one of his strong hands grabs your arm and pulls you back up before you can hit the ground. Your heart is still pounding in your chest from shock when you turn around and your eyes meet, his huge hand still on your arm, gentle and all warm. "I'm sorry," he says softly. "It's okay," you reply. You stare into each other's eyes for far too long, longer than would be normal or appropriate for two strangers, but something in his gaze holds you, like his hand. After a while, you pull yourself together and say, "Can I have my arm back?" You can tell you've snapped him out of his thoughts. He blinks, hastily lets go of your arm, and stammers a few apologies.

When you sit down at your desk again, he is still standing there. He looks at you, seeming indecisive or unsure. You smile gently and he automatically smiles back. "Is there anything else I can help you with?" you ask kindly. He realizes he's still staring at you. He laughs softly, nervously. "Um, yeah maybe." You look at him promptly and ask, "What can I help with?" "Will you go out with me?" Surprised, you look at him, feeling heat rise in your ears and cheeks. You didn't expect this, but you're anything but averse. "Go out?" you ask uncertainly nonetheless. He nods. "Yeah, sure. For coffee, or dinner... or maybe the fair on Naboo?" You grin at him, "A fair?" He beams at you with a nod and says, "Yeah, it's a great place to hang out."

You nod after a short moment, the offer much too tempting as you could refuse. He's a cute looker and obviously interested in you, you can't pass that up. "Okay, that sounds interesting" Wrecker is all excited, you can see it in his face, pink cheeks, big grin, he says a little jittery, "Can I pick you up tonight?" "I'd be delighted."

Tech

He is known to do modifications and repairs on speeders for clones who can't or don't want to go through the official channels. Clones who want their speeder souped up, or who have repeatedly damaged Republic property and need someone to make a repair without filing an official report. You've been sent by official authority to investigate, but you turned a blind eye and didn't rat out the Tech, who you think, is pretty cute. You are not a clone, but you did crash the speeder that was assigned to you by your office. Fortunately, you were unharmed, but the speeder is ruined. Tech agreed to come to you and repair the speeder after you stopped by. He shows up on time, as expected, at the address of the small warehouse you gave him. He has a small transporter with him that is full of tools and machines of all kinds. Tech looks at the speeder and sighs. "It's a total wreck," he says reprovingly.

"Can you fix it?" you ask nervously. Tech looks back and forth between you and the speeder, thinks for a moment, and finally says, "Possibly. I can try. When do you need the speeder fixed?" "By the weekend." Tech frowns and says, "That's only three days. That's a lot of work for three days" "I'll pay you, of course," you say hastily. "That's not the point," he says, waving it off, "The point is that besides me, I don't think anyone else can do it, at least not in that time frame." Even as he says this, he already pulls out the first tools and gets to work. "I know, that's why I came to you," you say with a smile. He looks up briefly, sees your smile and for a brief moment, a shy but proud smile twitches at the corners of his mouth.

He is highly concentrated and hard at work, you bring him snacks and drinks, because he doesn't even think of taking a break or having something to eat. When your hands touch as you hand him a glass of water, he looks at you, almost startled. There it is again very briefly, that shy smile, but he averts his gaze again before you really have time to interpret his expression and gets back to work. He's attracted to you, but he doesn't immediately know why, can't quite place this feeling. The next few days he smiles at you more often, you catch him watching you secretly, but every time you look at him, he is immediately busy working on the speeder again. You don't really know how to interpret his behavior. He's cute in his own way, but also a bit of a mystery. In fact, Tech manages to complete the repairs on time. The speeder looks like new when he proudly shows you his work. You're so relieved, you have to stop yourself from falling around his neck. When you go to pay him, Tech looks at the credits you're holding out to him, but doesn't touch them. You look at him questioningly. He clears his throat and asks, "May I suggest another method of payment?"

You blink in confusion. "Another method of payment?" you ask. Tech nods. "All right," you finally say, "Let's hear it." You see him swallow and tug at the collar of his Blacks before asking, "Would you be okay with a private meeting? Maybe for dinner?" Your heart suddenly beats faster. Is he really going for what you think? "A date?" you ask, surprised. He nods, and this time he shows you his sweet smile a little longer.

Crosshair

You see him fairly regularly. He always sits in the same place in the bar where you work, at the counter. He always drinks the same thing, Spotchka. Not a lot of it, two glasses at the most, spread leisurely throughout the evening. You can't help but keep eyeing him. He's striking, he seems brooding, so serious, somehow daring. He is the kind of man who seems dangerous and irresistible at the same time. You know what his name is. People have told stories about him here in the bar. Some are about what a unique sharpshooter Crosshair is, others, less flattering, call him a freak, part of the Sad Batch. You pick up a few snippets of conversation at the bar. So far, all you know is that he's incredibly attractive to you, you can't confirm either kind of story about him. But you don't care. Even tonight, your gaze creeps in his direction again and again, you can't help it, Crosshair has an attraction, something that fascinates you so much and puts you under his spell.

Every time he looks up, you hurriedly look away and hope he hasn't noticed. So far he hasn't moved, nor has he said anything, so you hope that your glances have gone unnoticed so far. But then something unexpected happens. You are cleaning the bar again at the height of his seat, as you do every now and then, when his hand moves forward and grabs you by the collar. He pulls you almost half over the counter. Your face close to his. " Boy," he growls, "if you keep staring at me like that, I'll insist you buy me dinner." You don't even dare blink at first, just stare at him. Finally, he rolls his eyes, lets go of you again, empties his glass, throws you a few credits, stands up and leaves the bar. You stand there like that for a long moment, heart pounding, still startled. Finally, you tug your shirt back into place, go about your business, but your heart doesn't calm down for quite a while. Over the next few days, he doesn't show up. You are torn between regret and relief. You've probably scared him off, you think to yourself, he's probably drinking his Spotchka in another bar now.

But you're wrong, as you find out, his squad has only been on mission for a few days. And sure enough, he shows up at the bar again, sits down at the same place at your counter. But something is different. He watches you, his gaze so intense that you can almost physically feel him. He orders his Spotchka as always, a toothpick in the corner of his mouth that moves ever so slightly. Every time you look in his direction, he looks at you piercingly, and you avoid his gaze, not really knowing what to do. Actually, you're not that extremely shy, but Crosshair makes you nervous. Suddenly, you hear him mutter, "How long are you going to ignore me?" You look up in surprise. "Do you want to order something?" you ask automatically. "No, my glass is still full," he says dryly. You glance at the glass and see he's right. Bolder than you feel, you ask, "Then why shouldn't I ignore you?" He beckons you toward him with his finger, and you follow the request quite automatically, as if he were pulling you in his direction on an invisible rope.

What you don't know is that he thought long and hard about coming back. The moment when he grabbed you by the collar last time, something happened to him. At first, he thought he was annoyed by your stare, but as soon as he had you right in front of him, he felt something completely different and surprising that he couldn't quite place. Crosshair thought about it and curiosity triumphed, he wanted to see you again and get to the bottom of this. "What about dinner now?" he asks, as if you've worked something out. "What?" you ask, perplexed. He rolls his eyes and says, "Dinner, handsome." You blink a few times, then say perkily, "You've been staring at me the whole time today. Why don't you invite me?" Crosshair raises his brows in surprise, then smirks. "All right. Can you find a replacement for tomorrow night?" You think for a moment and nod. "Can do"

Crosshair nods contentedly, his heart beating up in his throat, but outwardly you can't tell. "I'll pick you up here tomorrow at eight," he says, taking a sip from his glass.

Rex

He doesn't know what it is. Every time he has to go to the office to get documents, and he sees you sitting at the desk, he feels a tingling in his stomach, when your head lifts, and you smile at him, he feels warm in his armor. You greet him by name, he greets you back. Now and then you exchange a few words. He enjoys this moment, but can't really name what he feels in your presence, he only knows that he likes it. He likes the way you smile at him, the way you talk to him. Over time, he realizes that sometimes you flirt and part of him is surprised, maybe even scared. Does he have a crush? Rex isn't really sure; he's never had to deal with that before. He always takes a few minutes for you, even when he's supposed to be just getting something for the general. He doesn't normally do that, but it's so hard to leave once you two have engaged in conversation. Rex is polite, charming, smart, handsome. You really enjoy these little encounters, but actually that's not enough for you.

When he comes back into your office, with that little smile on his lips, your heart is beating wildly, but you've made a decision, you want to venture further. "Hello Rex." He greets you back and comes closer to your desk, sitting down on the edge like he's always done for a while. "How have you been?" he asks gently. You say with a smile, "I missed you." Rex blinks, his eyes widening a little, then he smiles, "Oh yeah?" You nod. "Do I need to come over more often?" he asks suggestively. "I'd like that. Maybe sometime outside of work hours?" He looks at you in surprise. Rex realizes you're past the simple flirting stage and gets a little nervous. But the thought is incredibly tempting and overcomes his nervousness. It takes him a while to answer, his silence already making you nervous, but then he shows you his adorable smile. "I'd love to"

Fives

You work with Kix in the infirmary and one of your most frequent patients, is Fives. He is a mess. He's always getting hurt somewhere or having stupid ideas where his brothers get hurt, and he brings them to the infirmary. Kix rolls his eyes every time he sees Fives enter the ward. He often doesn't even care anymore and lets you go first. "This patient is all yours," Kix grumbles and retreats to his desk. Fives often tells you the wildest stories, or asks tons of questions. "It's not often you see medics who aren't clones here. How come you work here?" You have rubbed baccta ointment on his hand, which he somehow burned, he won't say how, and are bandaging it now. "It was the only job available at the moment, at least here locally, so I took it," you say lightly. He looks at you curiously, seeming to study every little thing about you silently, unabashedly. You try not to let it make you nervous. As you meet his gaze, he flashes you his adorable, cheeky smile. You can't help it, and smile back. "You're kind of cute," Fives says thoughtfully, candidly.

You blink in surprise. "Oh yeah?" you ask, laughing softly. "Stop flirting Fives," Kix growls from the background, "He's not going to date you." Fives gets indignant, "Oh yeah, and why not?" Kix cocks an eyebrow and says in a sassy manner, "Because you're a disaster on two legs" Fives laughs bemusedly and looks at you, "I think you're adventurous, so a bit of disaster potential doesn't scare you off, does it?" You frown, half amused, half worried. "I don't know about that." Fives says confidently, "But you fancy me, am I right?" You feel your cheeks and ears getting hot. Sure you fancy him, he's hot, funny, and admittedly really messy, but also incredibly endearing in his own way. Fives grins, "It's okay, the feeling is mutual." You can literally hear Kix rolling his eyes.

When you still don't say anything, Fives says perkily with a wink, "Tomorrow night when your shift is over, I'll pick you up here. We'll go out for dinner, and then we'll see what we're in the mood for." You laugh nervously and finally nod, "Alright. I'm curious." Fives, jumps off the treatment table, winks at you again before leaving the room and saying, "See you tomorrow!" You sigh softly, your heart beating wildly, butterflies spreading in your stomach. Then you feel Kix looking at you and you turn to face him. He laughs, and his expression looks amused. "What is it?" "You've got a crush, and you'll soon regret falling for Fives of all people, he's a handful".

Ko-Fi (If you feel like giving me some coffee)

@rintheemolion

@andyoufollowyourheart @clone-whore-99

@brynhildrmimi @kaliel2310

@misogirl828 @tech-deck

@meshla-madalene

@chxpsi

@thebahdbitch

@nahoney22 @ladykatakuri

@darkangel4121

@ttzamara

@arctrooper69

@padawancat97

@agenteliix

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@either-madness-or-brilliance

@ortizshinkaroff

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@echos-girlfriend

@cpnt616

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@pb-jellybeans

@antishadow2021

@sleepycreativewriter

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@techs-assistant

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honeysuckleharringtons · 5 months

Text

Part Five: "Seasonal Specials" ~ S. Harrington

Summary: (Then) Christmas Eve has rolled around, and unfortunately for a very pregnant Reader, she is stuck at home with a migraine. Luckily for her, her younger brother doesn't make for too bad of company. — (Now) A slow shift at Brew and Me turns out to be a good night for advice and a call from everyone's favorite nursing student.

Pairing: Nurse!Steve Harrington x Fem!Byers!Reader

Word Count: 1,900

Content Warning: teen pregnancy, discussions of homophobia, discussions of abuse and allusions to physical abuse, discussions of slut-shaming, Reader is lowkey bad at advice when it comes to these topics LMAO, explicit language, food consumption (Reader drinks hot chocolate), not really a warning but Will is gay and autistic in this series, as always lmk if i missed anything!

Extra Notes: this should've been posted way earlier, i am so sorry it wasn't. hope you guys enjoy though!

Originally Written: 12/21/2023 through 12/25/2023

honeysuckleharringtons' main masterlist can be found here!

'brew and me' series masterlist can be found here!

[ Then, December of 1987 ]

Christmas Eve. It was Christmas Eve and you were stuck at home with an excruciating headache.

You supposed it wasn't all bad. After all, staying at home was preferable over the rare occasion that you did leave the house, when everyone would stare you down like some caged animal at the zoo. Unfortunately, the same could be said for your family—no, not your immediate family, who'd helped you more than ever since you'd entered your third and final trimester—whose reactions had ranged from disgusted to sympathetic.

When you'd gone to the family's end-of-summer family reunion, you'd tried your best to hide the tiny bump you were sporting at the time. However, your aunt Judy had taken notice of your particularly round belly, and immediately figured out that it wasn't from one too many hot dogs at the cookout. Ever since then, you'd heard every comment in the book, everything from "whore throwing her life away" to "so sad she thought that was her only option."

So, instead of listening to the endless insults from your distant relatives, you'd prayed for some way out of the gathering. Unfortunately for you, God had a sense of humor, hence the excruciating headache.

The sound of the microwave beeping in the next room over set you off all over again, the noise like a hammer to the head. "Will, can't you tell that thing to shut up?" you groaned, covering your face with the compress he'd made you.

"Unfortunately, I don't think that's going to help," he joked. You couldn't tell if you wanted to laugh or kill him for his sense of humor. "Here's your hot chocolate."

You sat up ever-so-slightly, taking a small drink of the deep brown liquid. Almost instantly, the warmth of it made you feel a little better. "Thank you." You reached a hand over, ruffling his already messy hair. "By the way, you didn't have to stay home with me."

"And listen to Uncle Howie tell me how we're both going to hell? I'd rather have that headache of yours."

A snicker escaped your lips, knowing exactly what he meant. "Okay, maybe Uncle Howie is a bit too opinionated on the sex lives of sixteen and eighteen year olds, but you don't have to listen to him. I mean, you're missing out on Grandma's fruitcake, which is your favorite part of the holidays."

"After last year, listening to half our cousins tell me I'm fruitier than the cake, I don't think I'll ever eat it again." Will pulled his knees up to his chest, his face overtaken by an expression that looked a lot like longing. "Besides, it's not really worth it to me."

You set your mug aside before placing a hand on his knee. "What do you mean?"

"The way the family talks about you… I thought I was the black sheep of the family. You might as well be a purple sheep."

Your pregnancy hormones must've taken over, because instead of a normal reaction, you found yourself beginning to cry from his words. No, not because of pain from his statement, but rather comfort in knowing that he'd rather miss out on the finer things of life if it meant sticking up for you.

Will, and his lack of social cue skills, stared at you for a moment, unsure what to say. Eventually, he landed on, "Sorry if I made you more upset. I didn't-"

A small huff of amusement left your mouth as you shook your head. "No, Will," you smiled, reaching up to wipe away your excess tears, "I'm just… I'm really happy to have you."

He flashed you a closed-lip smile, one that felt so genuine and unapologetically Will. "I know you'd do the same for me."

[ Now, December of 1991 ]

"I would, kiddo. I really would."

Aster Bay was a different kind of beautiful at the holidays. Sure, the small college town was normally beautiful, but upon seeing the small-town glow overtake the place, you were sure you hadn't seen anything like it.

Apartments and beach-side condos decked out in Christmas lights, a tree as high as the clouds in the town square, students dressed in Christmas and Hanukkah sweaters, their dogs in matching attire. The town felt like your own personal snow globe, tiny flakes flooding the ground beneath your feet with every step.

The magic of the holidays of course carried over into your favorite little coffee shop, decorations of red and green covering the walls and counters while the smell of peppermint wafted through the air. Unfortunately for you and Max, the one thing your little coffee shop was lacking this Christmas Eve was customers.

Neither of you were really sure why the store was open. Nearly everyone had gone home for the holidays—students, patrons, and other baristas alike—and the store was dead quiet, aside from the soft sound of Sinead O'Conner playing on the overhead speaker. Silent Night is accurate, you thought to yourself.

"So, where's your lover boy at this Christmas Eve?" Max joked, breaking the long-winded silence.

You sighed, secretly longing for the nurse she spoke of. "Apparently they gave him a week off from the hospital so he went home to see his folks." A small wave of loneliness had come over you when Steve had told you about his departure a few days prior, when he stopped by to grab a latte for the road.

"That's nice. At least he's hopefully having a good time, not working on the holidays like some of us," she said lightheartedly. Though, you could've sworn you heard a hint of sadness in her tone.

"Hey, how come you aren't at home with your folks?" The question had been a simple one, but when Max looked up at you, you could tell her answer was about to be anything but simple.

Her arms folded tightly in front of her chest as she looked at you, a sigh falling between her plump lips. "It's… complicated."

You placed a loving hand on her shoulder. "I know we're only coworkers and we aren't really supposed to bring our personal lives to work with us, but you know you can talk to me, right? I'm your friend, plus I'm a mother so I have problem solving skills now."

She huffed in amusement at your last remark. "It's just… I can't really say a lot but my life in California, it's not as good as my life here. And as much as I love my mom, there's just… well, it's just better for me to stay here even as much as I miss her. Besides, it's not like I make enough to fly home and Neil certainly isn't going to pay for my flight."

You could tell from the clear distaste in the way she said Neil that she didn't like to say his name anymore than she had to. Unfortunately, you knew all too well what that was like, and there was a certain name that left a bad taste in your own mouth the same way Neil did for Max.

"I can't give you much advice because my dad was the one that left, but I promise, it does get better," you empathized. "You made the right decision by staying here. I'm proud of you, Max."

She began to fiddle with the sleeve of her flannel, her eyes darting away. "I hate being here though. I can't help my mom from here. There's no telling what he does to her when me and Billy are away."

You knew exactly what she meant by that too. "I know it doesn't seem like it, but that'll change too. Eventually he'll get tired of you and your mom fighting back and he'll leave. That's what my dad did anyway."

"The thing is," she paused, licking her lips, "I'm not sure my mom wants to fight back. It's like she wants to deal with Neil's bullshit. I mean, she divorced my dad over not making enough money and then she married Neil, who is still scraping at the bottom of the barrel to keep the lights on every month. Not to mention, she dated like ten guys in between and broke up with them for way less, but she'll always find a way to justify his actions."

You shrugged your shoulders. "My mom put up with it for seventeen years before she started to truly fight back." A small wave of silence came over the room before you continued, "I'm sorry I don't have much advice. I guess my situation was just a little different than most survivors'. One thing I can tell you though is that I'm proud of you for making the best decision for yourself. I know it's hard to put yourself first sometimes."

Max gave you a crooked smile, finally looking up at you again. "As much as it sucks that we've both been through a bad thing, I'm glad I have you to talk to about it."

"Of course, love. You're like a little sister to me."

Cutting your conversation short, the phone began to ring, the sound grating on your nerves. You loved your job, but it was Christmas Eve, damn it. In all honesty, you really just wanted to be at home, drinking hot chocolate with your girl in your lap and a movie playing on television.

Still, you picked up the phone, answering with the signature, "Happy holidays from Brew and Me. What can we do for you?"

"Can you tell me your seasonal specials?" said a familiar voice, his smirk audible in his tone.

"Steve! You're supposed to be on vacation," you scolded, though internally you were extremely happy to hear his voice. What is wrong with me? you pondered silently.

"I am, but I couldn't resist calling and ordering something."

Your brows furrowed at his statement. "How does that work?"

"Order anything you'd like and I'll pay you back when I get back to town. Think of it as a Christmas present, or whatever you celebrate."

"That feels like cheating, Harrington." Your eyes narrowed, despite his inability to see it.

"You don't have to tell me what it is, just how much I'll owe you," he replied. You could hear a fireplace crackling quietly in the background, and you could easily imagine him curled up in front of it, his skin covered with a thick Christmas sweater, glasses perched on his nose as he read a novel. "Same for Max or whoever else is working. Treat yourselves, courtesy of me."

"Well, thank you, Steve. We appreciate it," your lips curved upward into a smile as you spoke. "I hope you're enjoying your time off."

"I am. I'm sorry you have to work on Christmas Eve." You could almost hear the frown on his lips as he sympathized with you.

"It's not all bad. After all, I'm getting to hear from you."

"Careful, Byers, or I'll start to think you like me back," he smirked. Butterflies went off in your belly, your cheeks warm and surely rosy.

You were sure full sentences had escaped you, considering Steve had the ability to take your breath away and make you blush like no one else could. So, you stuck with what you knew you could say without stumbling over your words. "Happy holidays, Doc."

"It's a very happy holiday when I get to talk to you, Y/N."

So tumblr hates me...

I went over 24 hours thinking this chapter posted, only to find out tumblr ate it somewhere between my drafts, my queue, and my posts 🤦🏻‍♀️ this app loves to embarrass me

Anyway, I hope this was worth the extra long wait. It sucks that I'm posting it after the initial Christmas magic is over but I hope you guys liked it regardless! I will see you back here on Sunday for chapter six, which will be posted on time, fingers crossed!

-> taglist: @dungeons-are-too-cold @ducky-died-inside @awkotaco24 @liberhoe @princesseddie @corrodedseraphine @manuosorioh @esoltis280 @hazydespair @frostandflamesfanfic

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aurorawest · 4 months

Text

Bargain of Blood and Gold by Kristin Jacques - 3.75/5 stars

Reminiscent of Jordan L Hawk's Widdershins series, but with vampires and werewolves. Also takes place in Maine, which isn't a very common setting. Unwittingly, I bought the second book in the series months ago, and I realized as it got to the top of my TBR that I didn't have the first book! I had to scramble to order it and I was happy I enjoyed it since, obviously, I already have the second book.

Ander & Santi Were Here by Jonny Garza Villa - DNF at pg 2

Captive Prince by CS Pacat (reread) - 5/5 stars

Prince's Gambit by CS Pacat (reread) - 5/5 stars

Kings Rising by CS Pacat - 5/5 stars

I think I loved these books even more on my reread.

Gravity by Tal Bauer - 4.25/5 stars

Probably my favorite hockey romance that I've read.

The Modern Mythos Anomaly by Juniper Lake Fitzgerald - DNF at pg 132

I actually liked the story, the characters, and the writing in general, but this book just needed another few edits to slim it down a bit.

Lose You to Find Me by Erik J Brown - 4.5/5 stars

Leeward by Katie Daysh - 4.5/5 stars

The blurbs on this book are hilarious, because they're all like, tall ships people, and then Mackenzi Lee, hailing it as a lovely queer historical romance. This was a really lovely book and I'm excited for the sequel. Also hoping for more kissing in the sequel since this was a serious slow burn.

Riley Weaver Needs a Date to the Gaybutante Ball by Jason June - 3.75/5 stars

Starseer by Katya Hernández - 4/5 stars

Be Dazzled by Ryan La Sala - 5/5 stars

I loved this book so much!! Oh my god. Super funny, very romantic. It revolves around cosplay which is of course a special interest of mine.

Northranger by Rey Terciero and Bre Indigo - 4.5/5 stars

Flying Without a Net by EM Ben Shaul - 2.75/5 stars

The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley (reread) - 5/5 stars

Striking Distance by Sarah Rees Brennan - 4.75/5 stars

I didn't expect to like this as much as I did. The graphic novels were good but changing to a novel format allowed for much deeper characters. Surprisingly devastating and also really funny.

The Old Haunts by Allan Radcliffe - 4/5 stars

The Gay Best Friend by Nicholas DiDomizio - 5/5 stars

Main character is the best friend of both the bride and the groom, and everything surrounding the wedding becomes a train wreck beginning on the weekend of the bachelor party, when the bride asks the MC, Dom, to keep tabs on the groom for her. As someone who is extremely conflict avoidant with friends but not family and romantic partners, I heavily related to Dom. There's also a romance that I really loved.

Romance Languages by AJ Truman - 4.25/5 stars

I think this was my favorite of the South Rock series. It deals with some more difficult topics—Julian's self-loathing over his body image is heartbreaking (and relatable), and Seamus's guilt over the way his gambling addiction hurt his ex was very well done. I'm a sucker for stories where a character learns to ask for help, not to mention difficult parent-child relationships, and this had both. I also appreciated Julian's arc re: sex and virginity.

Darkhearts by James L Sutter - 5/5 stars

Another bandmates-in-love treasure, with a twist—the main character, David, left the band right before they got famous. He ends up falling for one of his ex-friends/bandmates after they reconnect. The author is a musician himself, and it definitely shows (in a good way). I'm really a sucker for The Burdens of Fame, which this book definitely had, but there's actually a really good arc for David and how he deals with his jealousy and resentment over being left behind. Plus he wants to be a carpenter rather than go to college, which was cool.

Brute by Kim Fielding - 4.25/5 stars

We Could Be So Good by Cat Sebastian - 5/5 stars

What can I say about this book? Why was it so lovely? Why did it make me feel so much? Why can I not rate things higher than 5 stars? It's a million stars in my heart. Aside from just being a gorgeous mid-century America m/m romance (my favorite), this one features an Italian-American main character. The stuff with Nick's family was spot-on. I just loved this book. I felt like I was wrapping myself in a big, comfy, historical gay romance blanket.

Drowned Country by Emily Tesh - 5/5 stars

The sequel to Silver in the Wood. Had a very mythic and sort of folk horror vibe. This one is from Henry Silver's POV instead of Tobias Finch's and takes place two years after Silver in the Wood, which is time that Henry has mostly spent sulking in Greenhollow Hall, sans Tobias. Really highly recommend this duology. Emily Tesh is a treasure.

The Alchemy of Moonlight by David Ferraro - DNF at pg 11

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lukabitch · 2 years

Note

I want to request this with Trickster, but I'd also like to give you the opportunity to write this scenario for any killers you might want to, so whoever you'd like along with him :) But, I was wondering how the killers would react to a male survivor (hello from a fellow gay) returning something important that they lost during a trial to them (a good luck charm, maybe, or something from their world prior to the entity like their add-ons). I'd imagine most survivors wouldn't care due to their position or be too scared to find the killer to return the item, so I just wonder how they'd react <3 Thank you so much

Omg? This is going to be so adorable! Thank you so much Anon! I added little blurbs at the end cause I thought it was too short. :)

The Trickster :

He lost his favorite earring. It was a red rose stud.

He didn’t have time during the trial to find it.

So he was sulking about it think he lost it for forever.

Then he felt a light tap on his shoulder. He turned around and it was you!

“I think I found your earring.” You held out your hand showing the stud.

Let me tell you this man was over the moon.

“Oh my lovely thank you so much!” He put the stud back in and showed it off.

He gives you a peck on the cheek saying you deserve a reward.

Obviously you were embarrassed but it felt nice.

Expect some special treatment next trial for your act of kindness.

You let out a small sigh looking up at the taller man. “If you don’t mind could I ask why it’s so important?” You watched him laugh to himself. “I was wearing this little stud when I discovered my calling.” You still had a curious look on your face. “When my band mates were burning alive I heard their screams. It was like beautiful symphony and I was wearing this little beauty.” Now your look was on of worry and concern. “That’s very interesting.”

Ghostface :

He lost his favorite camera! Good old Philly was missing!

He was very heartbroken over the loss. It contains his last moments in Philadelphia.

He didn’t know where he lost it but it happened during the trial.

Hearing a twig snap he whipped his head in your direction.

“I saw you dropped this.” It was Philly!

This man picks you up off the ground in a hug.

“Thanks handsome I owe you one don’t I?” You shake your head ‘no’ to him.

He’s shocked you didn’t want anything in return for your kindness.

“Are you sure sweet thing? I wouldn’t mind.” You still shake your head ‘no’.

He’s not taking no for an answer. He lifts his mask and gives you a quick kiss on the lips.

The kiss left you a bit stunned which he laughed at. “I can’t give you nothing in return handsome.” You shake off your shock and straighten yourself out. “What’s the story behind it.” The sigh that left his mouth was a happy one. “It captured my last night in Philly. That was a fun one.” You know how sadistic this man is. The less you know the better. “That must have been fun for you.” The smile was bitter sweet.

Micheal Myers :

He’s lost Judith’s journal after chasing on of the survivors he didn’t bother to learn names.

He was freaking out over it. He couldn’t handle it he needed it back.

Soon panic turns into anger and he didn’t know what to do with it.

“Micheal? Is this yours?” He heard your voice and turned around.

He’s anger dissipated seeing the journal.

He takes it and hold it to his chest. “It is yours I’m glad I found it.”

Your laughed calmed him more then he expected.

He pulled you close giving you a hug.

“Aw thank you. You didn’t have to do that.” You were grateful obviously.

He treated you more different then the others after this. He saved you for last and would either mori you or let you get hatch.

He kept you in his arms for as long as he could. “I Hope you don’t mind but I looked through your journal.” His grip got tighter all most threatening. “Don’t worry I thought they were cool. I get why you were worried.” His grip loosens. You feel his mask being pressed against your forehead. “Thank you Micheal.”

#dbd #dbd killer #dead by daylight #danny jed olsen johnson #dbd survivor #dbd x male reader #killer x survivor #micheal myers #request #danny johnson #dbd headcanons #dbd trickster #the trickster #the shape #dbd ghostface

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thesherrinfordfacility · 11 months

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please note that this is a pre-s2 masterpost; new one can be found here.

contrary to popular belief i am actually capable of writing up genuine theories about s2, but they are still wonderfully feral and unhinged in both tone and nature, so voila welcome to ✨rhi's crackpot speculation/meta masterpost✨ featuring some very special guests that are way more insightful and clever than me

note: contains spoilers

d-day edit: lmao let's sort this shitpit out🍲

old post-s2/s3-relevant metas etc but they didn't make it to the final cut of the new masterpost:

BIT NERVOUS about this being linked but fuck it, i didn't like the first two eps INITIALLY but in my defence i learnt the error of my ways and consider it to have been prime's fault

thoughts on s3 in the immediate aftermath

i heard you calling from across the ether for some whump material so i wrote some

also i meta-girlbossed a bit too close to the sun with recontextualising the lion/adam/eve parallels in s1e1 now that we know what we know about aziraphale and crowley pre-fall

someone shared their opinion about the playlists with me then i blacked out and when i came to there was meta

i got big feelings™ about the argument clip in that aziraphale is honestly just a nice man doing his fucking best (not a prediction but just a wee rant)

s2 live commentaries bc im sorry reading these back is GOLD:

episode 1/2 (lumped together bc i went to a screening) (also neil liked this and i feel exposed the poor guy had to read this??? over all the other somewhat intelligent stuff on my blog??? this is what he went for???? man's WILD ✨)

episode 3

episode 4

episode 5

episode 6 (lmao)

and then basically anything else, mostly all pre-s2 so have a read and laugh at me, it's ok honest

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

this one made me tear up a bit because i live on a diet of bagels and aziraphale/crowley biblical whump material LMAO AM I APOLLO????

(as amended) the one where my entire theory on aziraphale and crowley's angst for s2 is predicted based on the length of his ridiculous (see: delicious) sideburns

an earlier musing on the plot of like the first three episodes (fuck it let's be real i'm just blueprinting a fanfic in this post)

by all accounts crowley is not, in fact, james bond

the second coming gets fucked up bc gabriel is a pussy ass bitch

✨✨SDCC/NYC✨✨ people pls read this and talk to me about it bc I'm losing it everyone else just shh and read silently for a minute ill get to you in a sec okay id still love to know what happened at the sdcc screening but i went to my own one in the uk and what i saw has done nothing to dissuade me from this theory im sorry

lol haven't updated this post in a hot minute but this is the SMOOCHY prediction

i told y'all crowley was getting hit by the cozzy livs and now my boy has to work in a pub, liz truss i hope ur happy

if i must suffer then you must suffer also thems the rules

✨✨live feed of my breakdown over the episode titles✨✨

a wee romantic shitpost about ep5 but im adding it in here for posterity bc if this does happen im going to simply decease

this was birthed from the above but with ep2(?) spoiler context

IS GOOB JESUS?????

i have a sinking feeling that crowley may be a double agent and honestly that's not very james bond of him

segue from the above, someone really cleverly came up with the thought after the wanted posters that crowley is involved in hell descending on the bookshop to get gabriel and was rewarded with duke of hell (hence the art of him on a throne) and i latched on like a fucking barnacle

I cry

(also as amended lmao) my rhetoric on how unequipped aziraphale is to handle intense gay panic god bless this mess this lil funky dude

i have now done so many speculation posts about the 40s that it feels like groundhog day but if prime insist on feeding me 40s content then that's their own damn fault (but this one is the most recent and where I'm currently at so read this one first)

(older) a tinfoil hat inspection of anything related to ww2!husbands, magician aziraphale, and the Dinner of '41

(older again) extended-Dinner of '41 analysis in the context of s1e3

once upon a time aziraphale and crowley fucked up the ineffable plan by not getting together in 1941 and god wasn't happy about it and everything went tits up, the end

a simple humble commentary on how the trailer was put together and a warning to not trust a single thing prime tells us

okay it's not s2 related but i had a bit of wine and a small heartbreak over their first meeting in the beginning and now any other method of therapy is redundant

and last but certainly not least (not for the moment anyway, there's a few more feet to descend before we truly scrape the bottom of the unholy barrel that is my psyche) we encounter the deranged, manic, unbalanced and frankly disturbed commentary i birthed in response to The Spoiler

enjoy, my boos ✨

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens speculation #good omens spoilers #no real need to interact im just doing this to pin it so i have my own handy reference guide for future analyses #and it saves me having to wade through the shitposting smorgasbord that is this blog

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hoardlikegoldenirises · 11 months

Text

after drawing the sparkly bider-man i wanted to make one for my AU... purely self-indulgent...

I doubt Peter would really take the time and expense to make a special pride suit he would only wear once or twice unless Johnny convinced him or smth so it's mostly hypothetical but still fun —

I was looking through my timeline trying to figure out when would make the most sense for this (which also included: has Johnny outed himself yet) and I ended up deciding 2014 makes the most sense because well, in 2012 he will be locked in a basement during June, and in 2013 he would be busy with Electro and finishing grad school, but 2014 is like... right after he and Flash get married so I can easily imagine Johnny being like "cmoooon let's dress up together, you just got gay-married" etc. and, well, peter does like to dress up... (otherwise he wouldn't be in spandex all the time 😂)

normally I avoid metallic or shiny spandex like the plague for suit designs cause I think it looks cheap but I made an exception for this 😂 it probably IS cheap...

closeups:

posing for pictures... johnny's idea, naturally. in my timeline i think johnny outs himself in like 2011 or so after a very messy divorce (from lyja) but I'm not spending too much time on the F4 stuff in this aside from just having a general idea so if they appear in a fic I know what's going on 😅 anyway by 2014 johnny is def way more comfortable with being publicly gay, since the cat's long out of the bag, though he's still got a lot of issues... but he's good at pretending to be okay :)

but also he still has a crush on peter 😂 tfw you have the hots for your superhero friend who just got married

peter actually already knows how johnny feels about him by the time he gets married, i just thought the dialogue was funny

I thought it would be fun if the lens frames were sparkly... normally I have his frames out of vulcanized black rubber (like car tire rubber) (...like might actually be carved from old tires) just cause I prefer the matte and slightly soft look compared to plastic... I figure something like sparkly firm silicone or sparkly plastic is probably pretty achievable for Peter to make. And the lenses would just be his normal bulletproof lenses but with an iridescent film on the outside to make them a little rainbowy...

and I think in 2014 irl holographic glitter spandex was like... something that existed that you could buy lol so i figure he can very carefully sew a holographic spider on.... so the spiders are like, that silvery white rainbow glitter kind of look

no webbing because there's a limit to how much labor and time peter would be willing to put into a flashy, kind of useless costume that he wouldn't be able to/want to wear very often... (and i wasn't a fan of how it looked)

bisexual fingers. there's a dirty joke in there somewhere.

it's difficult to come up with body-covering outfits that are suitable for summer weather as-is but the fact that he's wearing polyester spandex underneath really adds a layer of "i'm going to get heatstroke and die" to this outfit. lots of linen though. at least the armpits are athletic mesh.

also yeah the spidey shirt is a leotard with a snap crotch so. he's really just hoping that doesn't unroll under his clothes cause it would absolutely hang down very visibly from under his shirt if it were to fall. (maybe he can use his electrostatic sticking powers to just. hold it in place...)

he also can't roll down the waistband of his tights because it's more rigid than the rest of his costume on account of that's where he keeps all his spare web cartridges and it would suck if they all fell out LOL

hm i just noticed i accidentally gave peter a purple happy trail oops just pretend that's black

anyway

that's AU bider-man

i also drew this which is much more corny/embarrassing but i thought it was a cute idea — by necessity has to be after flash is public and transitioning etc… so 2016 at the earliest but i drew this more like 2017 or 2018, after she's been on hrt and stuff and is probably more confident

i don't think there's a worry of accidentally spotlighting her/outing her because, well, she probably doesn't pass in a lot of people's eyes… broad shoulders, sideburns, etc. but… peter thinks she's pretty ❤️

i was gonna draw more of the gang but then the list kept expanding like, oh should i include X, what about Y? and it was. too many people. so then i just decided to only draw flash and peter 😂

they should have stickers on their shirts though... like a polyamory sticker... or pins...

#came in through the window last night #biderman #spiderman #spider-man #nadiart #fanadiart #arghdesign #peter parker

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total-drama-shark · 1 year

Text

First impressions on every contestant!

Warning this gets long.

Millie

Was really interested on the possibility of a nerdy character from her introduction, but I feel like my biggest gripe with her is the whole “my generation” thing, it just feels slightly mean spirited and not realistic for a personality trait. Teens generally don’t like being told that their generation sucks or that they’re all dumb or have their use of technology criticized. The ones that do dislike their generation are those either trying to receive approval from older people or “I was born in the wrong generation” type kids. She’s just, unrelatable.

Axel

Her voice is higher than I expected, I like the survival theme and was surprised we got another zombie conspiracy nut in the cast (so happy we got a Shawn cameo/reference as well!) she really is like a mix of Jo and Eva with a sprinkle of Shawn and I wish we got to see more of her!

Priya

Super interesting to see a contestant raised by TD fans, and her intro was amazing! Baby and toddler Priya! Owen reference! She is 100% going to be an interesting character. I guess there’s also a subversion of a big Desi stereotype with her, she wants to go to med school but her parents want her to enter a more unconventional and unstable field, I don’t know exactly how to feel about this, specially since I’m not desi myself.

Zee

My man!!! I love me a skater/surfer dude and the Jude vibes are impeccable!! He is so chill and just here to vibe. I’ve audibly laughed at multiple of his lines and just love him so much. I also think he’s neat amputee rep, he’s casual about it and was just born that way, but can make fun stories up about it.

Ripper

Am I disappointed by the fart and potty jokes? Yes, but besides that I actually really like his character! An annoying bully who despite his best efforts is a loser. Also if his voice doesn’t fuel the nowen child headcanons out there I don’t know what will.

Damien

A total newbie! Very opposite to Priya in this case and also super interesting character trait for him, I hope both him and Priya can function a bit to show off the POV of both old and new fans alike. He’s also very entertaining :)

Scary girl

Exactly what I expected from her and more! She is very much one dimensional compared to most the rest but I love her! I love wildcards! So excited to see her shenanigans

Bowie

Introducing yourself as the first openly gay contestant is definitely a first impression! I’ve got to say I adore his competitive and scheming nature and you can tell he’s in it to win it, he also has amazing social skills and is overall an icon. I know not everyone will be into the idea of the first openly queer contestant being very stereotypical but I’ve always thought that just as while his sexuality isn’t the center of his personality and there’s at least another queer character that isn’t as stereotypical it’s all good, and by the looks of it that will be the case. Also I know multiple gay dudes that act just as him so I have a bias.

Chase

Did not expect a stunt Youtuber type guy but I definitely should’ve seen it coming, also DRAMA?? Pre established EXES??? I am so interested in seeing how this pans out

Emma

I love her voice first of all and I did not expect her to have been part of the stunt Youtuber group, hope the ex drama isn’t all there is to her character and I really enjoy her friendship with Bowie so far!

Oh I love her, we haven’t seen a character like her before and she has so much potential! A character that knows she’s underestimated and takes advantage of that? Yes please!

Caleb

Pretty much a Justin copy, I can’t really say much about him and we knew how things were going to pan out so I can only hope he’ll make if farther and get more development next season.

Wayne & Raj

Hockey dudes! They’re such jocks and can sense the “makes fun of me lightly for being unathletic but cheers for me when I finally start participating in sports” energy from them so hard, they’re fun guys and feel so much like real teen boys.

Nichelle

An actual TV star! I didn’t see that coming but I love it! Love seeing the little flashbacks to her shows and movies and seeing someone in the show be treated as an actual celebrity, she’s also as far as I’ve seen pretty smart, level headed, and humble for a TV celebrity! So interested in seeing her work!

Julia

The influencer chick! Her intro was amazing and I definitely didn’t expect her to be into healing crystals, feel like she’ll be a very interesting character and I await her interactions with Nichelle.

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aut1sm-mess · 1 month

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“The dragon and the carnation”

My very first fanfic that I am not completely ashamed of YAY!

Modern! Au where Heiji and fowler are just gay old men that live together

It has elements of whump, sickness (flu mostly), and self-neglect.

Idk how to put stuff on Ao3 but I will probably put this on Wattpad soon. Word count: 1056

Usually, Heiji Shindo gets up at around 5:30 in the morning; This is because getting up early allows him to get ready for the day before everyone else.

Today, was not one of those days.

In fact, it was one of the rare occasions where Abijah fowler was, awake, almost an hour before Heiji. That was definitely a sign that something was wrong. Around 7:00, Heiji dazedly and shakily walked out of their shared room, his head pounding. “You’re up late~”, said fowler as he watched Heiji pour himself some coffee. Again, an uncommon occurrence for Heiji as he usually made a cup of his favourite genmaicha (a tea made using leaves and puffed rice).

Heiji grumbled after he took a sip. And Abijah took this as a chance to tease him, “oooh, Heiji, yeh don’t look too hot. Heh..”

“Oh, FUCK OFF, FOWLER!” Fowler was stunned at this sudden snap, “TODAY IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOUR….*coughs* BULLSHIT!…. I’m fine….” “Sorry..”, yelling at his husband really worsened Heiji’s already sore throat. And the fact that he overreacted to Abijah’s innocent enough teasing really guilted him.

“Babe,” Abijah took a second to stare Heiji right in the eyes “if you’re not feeling well, you can tell me,” “because by looks of it, you should be in bed”. Heiji felt shame at the thought of seeming weak in front of Fowler. “No, honey, I’m *sniffles* fine,” “you don’t need to worry about me” He smiled weakly to try and make it seem like it’s all good. Abijah wasn’t buying any of that, but sighed as he didn’t have the energy that morning to protest this. And stared out the kitchen window looking at the snowy, icy weather outside and sighed again.

Heiji made his way over to their room and into the walk-in closet to take off his pyjamas and put on his clothes. He took them off and noted how his body was weak. Sore as if he’d done some sort of heavy labour. Every part of his form felt heavy and cold, like lead… After putting on his kimono and pants, he recounted a mental to-do list of things he had to do that day:

- Walk over to whole foods (important, they just got in some artisan cheese and olives that Abijah would beg to have.)

- Place an order for new ceramic tools, clay and 2 new colours of glaze (very important, he recently received an order for an ornate vase that it’s important to get to work on ASAP)

- Clean up his pottery studio

- Put a special hand-built teapot in the kiln for a bisque fire

- And then, finally, rest…

The first thing seemed easy enough; walking 0.8 kilometres to whole foods. He forgot a key element of this walk. It was about -2 degrees Celsius and Heiji, not wanting to make it take longer, purposely didn’t bundle up.

He made his way to the front door and just when he was about to leave, Abijah said, “Heiji, love, it’s freezing out there! You can’t go out in that!” He said this genuine concern for Heiji. “Don’t say I didn’t warn yeh..” Heiji, flustered, walked out and sighed. He instantly felt the million-needle feeling of the icy air outside. His breath hitched, it went shallow because it hurt to breathe deeply, and his face stung. “It’s not a far walk. Don’t be a baby. You’ll be fine, dumbass” Heiji thought, “sick days are for kindergarteners..” With reluctance, he started walking; pretty sure that he looked fine. In reality, he most definitely looked like he’s dying to anyone who saw him.

“Finally, I’m fucking here,” he whispered under his breath. Canvas tote bag in hand, he put on a surgical mask that he had in his pocket. And made his way over to the whole foods olive bar; “Yum!” Heiji thought as he saw the new kind of both manzanilla and Nyon green & black European olives. “I really hope he likes these.~” He packaged them and put them in his tote. And made his way over to the artisan cheese area. While he was there-“COUGH! HACK, COUGH!” His chest felt tight & sore and his abdomen felt stabby. His face turned red as he saw the people around look at him with worry and apprehension and confusion.

Heiji sheepishly smiled and turned away feeling worse than he already had been. Partially because of embarrassment and the fact that he sounded like he hacked out a lung. But also because he was thinking about what Abijah said and how it definitely true. So, he made a logical-seeming plan. He picked up the god-forsaken truffle Brie, paid for his stuff and got the hell out of there. He used his last millimetre of energy to walk back to their manor. It was warm inside the store and he had acclimated to it and thus, felt that familiar million-needle sensation when he walked out.

Whilst walking, he felt like the earth was pulling him down and his walking was laboured. “Ugh, I wish I had the energy to speed walk, then I could get out of this horrible weather,” he said under his breath “almost home, Heiji, almost home…”

Walking up to his house, Heiji felt a ringing in his ears and his steps faltered. His knees buckled, his rolled back and then…. Thud!

Abijah heard the loud noise, walked out the door and his curiosity quickly turned to shock. “Hm…OH!…Heiji no..no!” He quickly scooped him up into his arms “Heiji, you old fool!”

“God, my head is fucking pounding…,” Heiji thought this as he regained consciousness. “Oh..”, he mumbled “I’m really damn stupid”…

Fowler saw that Heiji had woken up and immediately ran up to him and slapped him in the face. “Heiji, you fool!” “I…I was so worried about you and what did you do?! Go outside and pass out!” Heiji was still delirious, so Abijah reprimanding him felt like part of a weird dream, “Abijah….” He said using all his strength “I’m sorry…I..I,” Abijah stopped him. “HUSH!” “Honey, while you disappointed me by your self-neglect, I forgive you. Now let me take care of you *mwah*.”

WOw first fic where I utilised my above-average English language skills. HOPE YOU LIKED IT SLUTS

#bes fic #bes fanfic #bes #blue eyed samurai #blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai netflix #abijah fowler #heiji shindo #fowdo #my fic

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