#idk what this is but feel free to reply or send something else if this doesn't work aksksk

[doki-doki-imagines]

PLS PLS CAN YOU DO THAT CHAT THING WITH KAISER, NESS, SAE AND NAGI WHERE READER TEXTS THEM SAYING “your face is so pretty I just wanna sit on it” AND THEIR REACTIONS😍😍

author note: Idk how to use fake sms app so I went for an ol' classic gif reaction.

Michael Kaiser:

-What is he looking at? At his reflex on the mirror obviously. -A laughter starts to blossom from his chest, already pushed out like a proud rooster. -He slicks his hair back, blue eyes shining with joy. Michael licks his teeth, perfect as he is. Damn, anybody would like to sit on his face; he is so fucking handsome. -He picks his phone up ready to message you something along the lines of "C'mere. I'll give you the ride of your life." Michael smirks, proud of coming up with such a hot line(it isn't). -But the message you sent got deleted. -His eyes bulge out almost cartoon style. Did he dream about it? Was the message from someone else? Michael checks the other chats, but nobody messaged him. -He doesn't want to message you about that, he isn't desperate! But a voice in the back of Michael's mind screams at him. -"?" He sends back. "Did you need something?" "No, Michael. Thanks for worrying." You reply immediately. -His heart picks a worryingly fast beat. You replied way too fast. A lightbulb turn on in his head, but the idea he comes up with is pretty risky. Michael feels blood running to his ears when he finally presses send. -"If you are free wanna come over? I need help choosing the new bed covers."

Alexis Ness:

-He is mind-numbing happy. After all, it is a pretty nice compliment to read from his crush. -If Alexis had a tail it would be wagging left and right now. A dumb smile is plastered on his face while he keeps looking at his phone. -"What are you looking at, Ness?" It's Michael's voice calling him back to work, mildly annoyed that the other boy's attention wasn't fully on him. "Oh- It's nothing, Kaiser! Let's go back to training." Alexis hides his cell phone under the last layer of his gym bag. Michael doesn't dig further for once. -When Alexis opens his phone back the sun already left his place for the moon. He obviously forgot about your message 'till he reads the new ones. "Have I crossed any boundary, Alexis? I'm sorry if it happened." "Please I don't want our friendship to be ruined by this." His heart sunk to his ass and climbed back into his throat in a matter of seconds. -Alexis calls you, clearly worried. You pick up fast for Alexis' heart health. "I'm so sorry I didn't reply sooner! I had practice and I had to go then-" he keeps blabbering "I'll do anything for your forgiveness." "…Anything Alexis?" "Yes." "I wasn't joking when I sent you that message…my or your place?" "Yours. It will be my pleasure." He says, voice finally calm. -He wasn't joking.

Sae Itoshi:

-"I must have forgotten the part where I asked your opinion." -HE IS RUDE. -Sae knows it is a joke. A stupid one to try to tease him. He may not be the brightest mind, but he understands what you are trying to do. -He goes back to training like nothing happened. Then he showers and all of sudden Sae has the urge to add another line to the previous message he sent. -Meanwhile, you replied with a ton of sad emojis and other dumb blabbering Sae's mind doesn't even register. -"Anyway I prefer to eat it from the back." Sae smiles thinking he has just sent the king of the comebacks, an earth-shattering line. Soon he gets a reply, that makes his smile drop. "I must have forgotten the part where I asked about your opinion." -Maybe you are really made for each other.

Seishiro Nagi:

-What a nice message to receive. Not. -You are hundreds of kilometres of distance what is supposed to happen? Honestly thinking is tiring him out. -Seishiri sends you the thumb-up emoji and throws his phone somewhere on his bed, pc already turned on to play the newest game. -But now a worm dug a hole in his head, making Seishiro thinks about the message and not at his ranking flopping; such a noob behavior. -He thinks about your soft thighs pressing his ears, your warmth enveloping his face… -Seishiro facepalms, fingers messaging his temples before brushing away some of his snow white hair strands away from his forehead. -He doesn't even notice he already dialed your number. -"Talk dirty." "What? Muddy pants? Sweaty shirts?" "Don't play dumb. It's all your fault if I can't concentrate now. And don't let me explain, it's bothersome." You chuckle at the other end. He can feel the mirth in your voice. "Sorry angel. You'll have to work if you want the prize." -He groans in annoyance, head thrown back. -It seems like Seishiro will have to break his "5 days doing nothing useful" streak.

#bllk x reader #blue lock x reader #bllk headcanons #blue lock headcanons #bllk imagines #blue lock imagines #michael kaiser #michael kaiser x reader #alexis ness #alexis ness x reader #sae itoshi #sae itoshi x reader #sae x reader #nagi seishiro #nagi seishiro x reader #nagi x reader

[moonstruckme]

hi :3

everytime i send you a request my personality’s different HAHA

okay, sooo, i was thinking (rare occasion) about your casual dominance story (LOVE btw)

so, how about that EXCEPT reader is the casually dominant one >:)

feel free to ignore this, ik this isnt like what u normally do

love ya MWA

Okay so I swear I tried to do dominant reader but it just turned into this, idk how it happened. She’s not super dominant but she’s not submissive and she definitely gets her way, so I hope you like it <3

cw: alcohol, suggestive content + a bit of light degradation, mdni please

Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 601 words

You find the marauders in the living room. At the center of the party, as usual. 

“Hey, gorgeous.” Sirius’ eyes find you instantly. He grins. Remus follows his gaze, and immediately starts talking to James about something else. “I was just thinking about you.” 

“You’re always thinking about me,” you say, bypassing the space he makes for you on the couch to sit in his lap. 

He scoffs, settling his hand on your thigh. You know he can smell your conditioner. You hope he dreams about it. “Sweetheart,” he replies, breath warm on the shell of your ear, “you’re projecting.” 

You let your head fall back on his shoulder, batting your eyelashes up on him. “That’s a five dollar word there, baby. You taking lessons from Remus?” 

Sirius makes a sound like he’s choked on a laugh. He covers it up by taking a sip of his drink. His cropped shirt lifts when he raises his cup, and you swiftly turn around on his lap, covering the slice of abdomen from view. 

He raises an eyebrow at you. He knows what you’re doing, but he hardly minds. You’re conveniently placed to feel something stiff and familiar poking at your heat through his pants. 

You grin and shift a little, delighting when his cheeks pinken. 

Black fingernails dig into your thigh in an attempt to still you. 

“Doll,” Sirius says warningly. 

You ignore him, plucking the cup from his hand and swirling it, sniffing at the liquid inside. Sirius holds your stare as you take a sip. 

“How many of these have you had?” you ask. 

“That there’s my second.” 

You hum, taking another sip. Strong, but not bad. 

“I’m gonna finish this one off,” you tell him. “I think you’re good for tonight.” 

He raises an eyebrow at you. “And why’s that?” 

You lean in close, wrapping one hand around the side of his neck and murmuring against the shell of his ear, “Because it’s no fun fucking you if you’re already stupid when we start.” You back up an inch, looking into eyes now eclipsed by pupil. “Okay, honey?” 

Sirius swallows. You feel the movement of his throat under your hand and stroke the side of his jaw with your thumb. Roll your hips again, just because you can. 

He takes in a sharp breath, hands clamping down on your hips to try and keep you in place. 

“Sirius, mate,” James says from the other side of the couch, “are you alright?” His brow is creased in concern, but you can see the tensed muscles around his mouth from the effort it takes to keep from smiling. Beside him, Remus is doing a much better job at exercising his poker face. “You look like your drink’s gone down the wrong pipe or something.” 

Sirius might normally see the knowing in his friend’s look, too, but he doesn’t take his eyes off of you. “I’m fine,” he says, voice impressively blase for someone who seems like he could cum in his pants with a couple of strategic movements on your part. “Just thinking it’s time me and my bird get out of here.” 

“What?” You make a show of leaning away from him, and the shift in your weight has Sirius gripping desperately at your hips. “Babe, it’s so early. We’ve only just got here. Let’s give it an hour at least, yeah?” 

“Really?” Sirius asks quietly, urgently. 

You take a slow sip of his drink, letting him see the way your throat bobs when you swallow. 

“Yeah,” you exhale as you finish. “Why, are you in some kind of hurry?”

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x fem!reader #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x you #sirius black x self insert #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fanfic #sirius black fic #sirius black imagine #sirius black scenario #sirius black drabble #sirius black blurb #sirius black oneshot #sirius black one shot #marauders #marauders fanfiction #the marauders #marauders fandom #marauders era #hp marauders #marauders x reader #tw alchohol mention

[mncxbe]

Absbsjskajnshajks idk if you’re taking more requests rn, but if it’s not an issue could I possibly request a part two of that fic you posted about reader having a cat ability which means that they’re sometimes in heat??😭😭 maybe with Tetchō and Jouno (only if you feel like it)

Yes of course and my requests are always open although it may take a while to write them♡ Also added Dazai to this one I hope you like it.

1.50♡ p2

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊, 𝑻𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒖, 𝑱ō𝒏𝒐 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: itty-bitty smut♡/ fluff??

°☆○ 1.50♡ ~ part 1

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊

this smug bastard takes advantage of your state in the most subtle ways; lingering touches, flirtatious smiles and passionate kisses

at work he teases you more than usually, describing all the sinful things he'd do to you if you were in a more private setting👀 really just gets you all riled up for nothing

but when you two get home he acts like a completely different person

"What, bella? do you need something from me?" he always asks with a smirk on his face "Maybe some assistance with your little... situation?"

doesn't lay a finger on you until you practically beg him (nicely); it's not like he'll ever admit it but hearing your desperate pleas really boosts his ego

he does his best to help you in other ways too. he'll do more chores around the house and write your reports at work if you really can't handle them. overall he's a good guy♡

Dazai was lounging around the office, wasting time and avoiding his chores; since you had been sent on a mission, your boyfriend didn't had much else to do. He had his headphones on and was listening to some funky song when you suddenly walked behind him.

Leaning over his frame, you swiftly hooked a finger beneath one of the speakers and lifted it.

"Boo" you whispered lowly, your hot breath sending a shiver down his spine.

"Ah bella here you are. How's my pretty girl doing?" He tried to get up from the couch but you pressed further on his back.

"Bella... Come on let me get up and give you a kiss. I missed you" he whined

"Oh trust me baby. I want way more than a kiss" you said in a teasing voice.

In a matter of seconds, Dazai was back on his feet and had you pinned down on the couch, a mocking smile on his face.

"You're that desperate for me, bella? You've only been gone for a couple of hours. You really can't spend that little time without my touch?"

Your gaze darted around the room, hoping that no one could witness the position you were in.

"I'm in heat, Dazai." you confessed quietly.

"What was that? I didn't quite catch it?"

"I said..." you began, rosy petal blooming on your cheeks "I said that I'm in heat, Osamu. Because of my ability"

"And what does that have to do with me, huh?" he tauned, lips hovering just above the shell of your ear. "Do you perhaps want me to have my way with you here? In the office?"

Your body quivered slightly at the sound of his low voice, making him giggle.

"Get up, bella. And go finish your job so we can leave early."

You nodded your head in agreement before straightening yourself. As you were making your way back to your desk, your boyfriend called out to you:

"Oh and bella?"

"Yes?" you asked sweetly

"Don't forget to ask Kunikida for a free day tomorrow. You'll be needing it after tonight" he replied with a wink, causing your blush to deepen.

𝑱ō𝒏𝒐

you don't have to tell him that you're in heat, he can smell your arousal

just like Dazai, this man gives you the most condescending smile and shamelessly teases you throughout the day

if you work someplace else he'll send you texts to check up on you and gently remind you that he'll provide any help you need once he gets home

but if you're part of the Hunting Dogs good luck. he's all over you all day, making snarky remarks about your "condition"

Jōno also likes to hear you beg; hearing your thumping heartbeat and sweet voice when you tell him how much you crave him really turns him on

will cook breakfast for you if you're too tired in the morning

Jōno woke up with warm sunshine on his face and your sleeping figure next to him. This hour and a half before work, when you'd both wake up and cuddled for a while then have breakfast together was among his most cherished moments.

Usually you'd wake up just minutes after him, turning to face him with a wide smile on your face as you sleepily uttered a "Good morning Sai" and showered him with kisses. Except you didn't do that today.

Jōno knew by the accelerated rhythm of your heart that you were awake, but you were not moving an inch.

"Darling? Is there something wrong?" he asked softly, placing his hand on your waist.

You quickly shook your head as you curled up in a fetal position "No, I'm good, I'm okay". Your voice was shaky and low, as if you were pain.

"Baby please, if you're hurt or not feeling well then please-"

And then it hit him; a strong, intoxicating scent coming from your body. A cocky smirk rose to his lips when he finally understood the cause of your distress.

"You're in heat, aren't you?"

You suddenly turned to face him with a pleading look on your face. "Yea..."

"Well then we must do something about that" he teased, his hand sliding to your thigh. "Would be a shame to let you go to work like this."

Your boyfriend expected you to protest just like you normally did when he initiated such things in the morning, but today you were so compliant. You scooted closer to him, leaning into his touch; eyes glazed in lust.

"Well aren't you needy today, princess?" he inquired playfully. He gently pushed you onto your back and spread your legs, the tips of his fingers skimming along your clothed slit.

"You're so wet already, princess. I can feel it through your clothes" The little moan that left your lips when his lithe digits slid beneath the wristband of your yoga shorts reverberated through Jōno's entire body.

With a swift tug at your pants and underwear he had you undressed, thumb lazily circling your clit. His hot breath fanned against your parted lips.

"Sai, gimme more~" you babbled out, fiercely seizing his wrist as you guided his fingers to your entrance.

Your boyfriend only smiled at your desperate attempt, ceasing his ministrations. "Take what you're given, sweetie. Or I won't give you anything at all" he purred, teeth grazing the shell of your ear.

You immediately complied with his order and released his arm. "Good girl. See, it wasn't that hard, was it?"

Suddenly, he plunged two of his fingers into you; stretching your leaking hole. A ragged moan escaped your parted lips as your nails dug into his forearm, causing your boyfriend to smirk. Your sinful sounds were like music to his ears, clouding his mind with lust. There was nothing he loved more than coaxing those delicious moans and whimpers out of you.

His digits pumped in and out of you at a steady pace; his thumb resuming its circular motions on your puffy clit.

"God baby I'm so close" you uttered in a ragged voice, thighs instinctively squeezing together.

Just as you felt the familiar heat pooling in your core, Jōno removed his hand from your underwear.

"Won't you look at that, love. We gotta go to work or we'll be late." he said tauntingly. You let out a loud hiss at the loss of touch.

"Sai, don't you dare leave me like this-" you cried out but it was too late. Your boyfriend was already on his way to the bathroom.

The rest of the morning was spent in silence hence you decided to punish your partner for teasing you. Of course, you were aware of how much Jōno enjoyed himself; a scornful laughter escaping his lips whenever you dodged his touch and kisses.

"I'm gonna head out, love. Good luck at work!" he voiced before leaving, but you didn't reply. A few seconds after you heard the door of your shared apartment close with a thud.

You spent most of the day in a state of utter annoyance and frustration, not being able to focus on any task you were given. All you wanted was for your partner to take care of your needs but instead he treated you like a plaything, leaving you brimming with pent-up desires.

Around 2 p.m, your phone chimed, announcing that you just received a text from Jōno. A rosy blush rose to your cheeks as your eyes scanned the glowing screen:

'Hi princess, I hope you're doing well at work. I know you're yearning for my touch but I promise I won't leave you unsatisfied tonight. Just be my good little girl and wait a few more hours. I know you can do it♡"

It's safe to say that that night, your boyfriend kept his promise.

𝑻𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒖

my sweet angel he's the most caring person ever istg. he's a bit confused when you tell him that you're in heat since he doesn't really know how that affects him??

but once you explain that you'll need him he blushes so hard; but he takes it well

Tecchou take princess treatment to another level during this time. You get to relax after work while he does all the chores and cooks food

he prepares baths for you or spontaneously buys you a bouquet of roses♡ he's really sweet

you're never left unsatisfied in bed, like never. he has an incredible stamina and a never ending need to please you

The setting sun painted the blue sky of Yokohama in shades of purple, red and ochre, a warm light glowing through the high ceiling windows of the building. Tecchou was compiling his last report for the day when you peeked your head through the open doors of his office.

"Hi Hiro. Got a minute?" you beamed, lips curling into an impish smile.

"Of course, darling. Come inside."

Your sweet boyfriend didn't suspect anything as you closed the door and walked up to him, hips swaying gracefully. You positioned yourself on his lap, snaking your arms around his neck.

"So Hiro. How soon can we go home?"

"Soon. I just need to finish the paperwork." he replied, pointing at the half written page with his black fountain pen.

You pushed your lower lip forward into a pout, impatiently swinging your legs. "Ok but how soon is soon?"

Without taking his eyes off of the report, your boyfriend shrugged. "In a few minutes but... if I may ask, why are you so eager to get home, darling?"

"Oh, well" you said in a honeyed voice "I don't know if I ever told you this but because of my cat-shifting ability I sometimes experience heats"

"And?" he pressed, utterly unaware of what you were implying. His slender fingers were gingerly caressing your hips, making you shift uncomfortably in his lap.

"What I'm saying is that I'm horny, Hiro. And I need you to fuck me."

Your boyfriend's eyes shot open and he droppen the pen, little droplets of ink splattering the pearly sheet; the grip he had on your hip also tightened.

Pleased with his reaction, you ran one hand down his chest, slightly tugging at the buttons of his vest. "But of course we don't need to be home for that. There's plenty of space here" you added, patting his wooden desk.

Upon hearing your daring proposal, Tecchou's face turned a light shade of pink. "I mean... We're at the office my love but I promise I'll take care of you at home, ok?"

You give him a small nod and a peck on the cheek before hopping off his lap. "I'll be waiting for you in the car. Hurry up"

As you walked towards the door you could hear a sudden rustling of paper as your boyfriend haphazardly attempted to finish his work. He caught up with you just as you were exiting the building; of course, you didn't fail to notice his ragged breath. He'd probably ran down the stairs. You let out a soft chuckle as you noticed this.

"So, darling. Is there anything else I can do for you besides, you know...?" he asked sweetly "I mean, how does this affect you?"

"Well, I tend to lack in energy levels and I have a terrible attention span. I was actually thinking about taking a week off work 'till I feel better."

"I see..." After thinking for a few moments, Tecchou grabbed both of your hand and spoke in a solemn voice "Then I will do my best to do as many chores around the house. I'll cook dinner for us too so don't worry about it. Just focus on feeling better, ok?"

The look on his face was of pure devotion and determination; causing warmth to pool in your core.

You rose to the tips of your toes and cupped his face with your warm hands before pressing your lips on his. The kiss was tender and loving at first, but you soon found one of your hands entangled in his coffee-coloured locks as soft moans rolled off your lips. He swiftly scooped you up and made his way to your car.

Your boyfriend placed you in the backseat before taking off his cape and discarding it on the passanger's seat.

"Wait, Hiro. What are you doing?"

His skilled fingers quickly undid the buttons of his vest and he slid it off his shoulders, leaving him only in his tank top which showed his toned arms. All this time his hungry gaze was locked with yours, making you shiver with anticipation.

"Well darling. I guess you're not the only who's eager tonight" he said before joining you in the rear seat; hurriedly closing the door behind him.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #bsd fluff #bsd smut #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #dazai bsd #dazai smut #bsd tecchou #tetchou x reader #bsd tetchou #jono x reader #jono saigiku #jono bsd #jouno smut #hunting dogs bsd #bsd headcanons

[narcolini]

night//morning

marcus x luca, long distance pining perhaps?, 2k words tw for talking about death, specifically parents a/n: this contains s2 spoilers!!! dont say i didnt warn you!! also im taking an absolute leap of faith with what those missed calls mean so call it divergence from canon, or assumption of canon, or . yknow. enjoying free real estate idk (same with luca backstory hehe) tagging @drabbles-mc because it exists for her <3

Luca’s phone rings, just minutes before his usual alarm gets chance to—sending that weird fucking tune that Instagram uses, pin-balling from his nightstand, straight into his skull—screen lit and blinding. He should keep it on do not disturb, yeah, he knows that, but as disruptive as it is, this is exactly the reason he doesn’t. It’s meant to wake him up, because there aren’t many people that would message him this early in the morning, and there’s only one that’d ring him over Instagram, of all places. Free of charge and desperately reliant on the good of their internet connections.

‘Yo.’ He clears his throat after picking up, rubbing a hand across his sleep-filled eyes. He’s on his back still, phone to his ear, smirk toying the edges of his mouth once they’ve woken up enough. ‘I’m guessing you got the parcel, then?’

The line is silent in response, and stays so for long enough that he pulls the phone away to check the call’s still connected. His eyes are bleary from the brightness of it, but it is, connected and split screened, both profile pictures staring back at him. Clock counting.

‘Marcus?’ he asks, speaking back into the phone. ‘Think we’ve got a bad connection, mate.’

More quiet. The hum of what sounds like an industrial extractor fan, if he really tries to listen for it. 

‘Can you hear me?’ he asks. 

‘Yeah,’ Marcus says eventually, staccato through the phone, ‘yeah, I, um.’ 

So it’s not the wifi. And there’s an edge to his voice that strips all remaining sleep from Luca's, and pulls him upright until he’s sitting, pillows rolling under his back. ‘You alright?’

‘Sorry.’

‘For what?’

Marcus sighs. The connection warps it into something robotic. ‘Calling you.’

‘Well, I assume there’s a reason for it.’ He wouldn’t ring for nothing, and he wouldn’t struggle if there wasn’t something forcing him to. ‘What’s up?’

Silence again, then the gulls, waking outside Luca’s window. Loud and begging before the sun’s even finished rising. Marcus isn’t doing anything to try and compete with them, though they must be audible to him too, so for a moment it feels like they’re a part of the conversation. Getting their turn while the both of them wait. 

He shouldn’t yawn, he shouldn’t, even with the pause, and he’s really trying not to. Swallowing nothing. Clenching his jaw, relaxing it again. Fighting it back with every trick he knows.

It happens anyway. Loud and stretching down the line. 

‘You want to talk about something else,’ he asks afterwards, since his eyes are starting to droop, ‘until you can talk about whatever it is that’s happened?’

Marcus coughs, dry and purposeless. Forced maybe. ‘I don’t know. I guess.’

That’s good enough. ‘Alright. Where are you?’

It’s a start. Where are you, Marcus, when you should be at home making something to eat, or at work, scrubbing dried dough from the counters. 

‘Out the back,’ he replies, sounding tired with it. Defeated, even.

‘The back of the restaurant?’

‘Yeah. Sitting on a,’ he laughs weakly, ‘a fucking, upturned bucket.’

‘Right. A bucket. That’s the luxury we aim for, isn’t it? As chefs.’

‘Yeah, something like that.’

Upturned buckets and 4AM alarms—which he’s just shut off, now that it’s finally buzzed into life against his ear. 

‘Tough night?’ he asks, sitting up from the pillows. He doesn’t have to go right away, but he has to at least start the process, one step at a time.

The phone cracks as Marcus coughs again. It’s definitely forced, aimed to dislodge whatever’s catching his words before they make it to Luca's ear. ‘Nah, um, good night actually,’ he says. ‘First run with the new, well, new everything. Friends and family.’ 

‘Really?’ Luca smiles. It carries into his voice. ‘Wow, congrats, man.’

‘I mean, it was all Syd and.’

He never finishes the sentence. 

Luca checks the phone again, not to see the connection, but for the time instead. To know how quick he’s going to have to move, if he lets himself be lazy for a little longer.

‘You get that, what was it…?’ He sighs down the line once it’s back to his cheek, rubbing at his sleep-swollen face. ‘Sorry, that bavarois you made, you get it onto the menu?’  

Marcus smiles, or at least he hopes he does. It sounds like it when he replies. ‘Yeah, you know, big hit. Fire, in Carmy’s words.’

‘Oh, that’s when you know it’s good,’ he agrees, finally standing from the bed. ‘Proud of you, mate.’

‘Thank-you.’ 

Another silence to fill, and now it’s getting hard to. Because it’s early, and he’s trying to get dressed, tugging one leg, then the other, into his trousers, with the phone pinned to his shoulder, and he’s asked all he can think to ask, without espresso fuelling his system. 

‘You, um, you get my gift?’ he tries, hopping as he pulls them up to his hips. 

But it was badly timed, in the end, because Marcus chose exactly then to say, ‘My mom,’ at the same time. ‘It’s my mom.’

‘Oh, shit.’ Luca stills. Lifts the phone from his shoulder. ‘Is she—did she—I’m sorry. Fuck.’

‘I missed the calls,’ he says, ‘all, fucking, twenty of them. While we were in the shit.’

‘I don’t know what to say.’ He doesn’t know what to do either, standing half-dressed in his half-lit bedroom, half-way across the world. ‘What happened?’

‘I mean,’ he can picture Marcus shrugging, ‘exactly what we knew would happen. Just, y’know.’

Yeah, he knows.

‘I was expecting it,’ he says. ‘I mean, it had to happen one day.’

Luca sighs. ‘I’m so, so, sorry, Marcus.’

‘Nah, it’s. I mean. Yeah. Life sucks, huh? Really fucking sucks.’ He laughs and it sounds weaker than before. ‘I don’t even know what I’m feeling right now.’

Yeah, he knows that too.

‘I wish I could be there,’ Luca admits. It’s a weak offer of support. Not comforting, not helpful. True, though, and that’s all he can give him. ‘Can I do anything?’ he asks, picking at the wooden edge of his drawers. ‘Anything you need, just let me know and I’ll, yeah, I’ll make it happen.’

‘Nah,’ he sighs, ‘sorry, I don’t know why I called you, really. I mean, we’re not even in the same country.’ 

'It's alright.'

'Opened my phone and it kind of just... happened.'

Because he knew Luca would pick up. ‘Well, I’m awake,’ he reasons, ‘and here, if you need to talk.’

‘Yeah, thank-you. I know.’

‘Not much to say though, is there?’

There’s a silence that Luca can only assume is signalling a head shake, over there in Chicago, in the alley, on top of the bucket.

‘It’s not the same,’ he continues, running with it now, ‘well, I guess it is—sort of—but, when my dad died, I sat in my room for weeks. Didn’t say anything to anybody. Couldn’t if I tried.’ 

‘Your dad?’

He doesn’t pause to answer. He’s already losing the momentum he started with, gone the second he invited Dad back into his head. The only thing to do, is try and continue like they’ve spoken about it a million times before, like Marcus knows the whole fucked up backstory.

‘Went to the funeral, all that stuff, the wake, still said nothing. Just, really, shut down, you know? Shut it out. And my sister, she, well she hated that, but—I mean, and then I went to Chicago and—’

‘Luca, I…’ He’s trying to be polite about it, interrupting in a sheepish way, but what he really wants to say is, shut up, man, it’s not the time for this. It’s evident enough in his tone. His pauses. ‘I’m really trying to keep up, but—’

‘My point is,’ Luca says, quickly followed by, ‘actually, I don’t know what my point is. But this is the worst, worst thing you can go through, alright, I know that first hand. It’s the worst. And I’m here, even if you want to just sit on the phone for company, or something.’

A beat. The tinny sound of a siren passing Marcus on the other side of the world.

‘I’m very good at chatting copious amounts of shit, obviously.’ Luca laughs. ‘So, you know. Whatever you need.’

‘I think I need to quit my job,’ he says, and for a second it feels like someone else has taken the phone, because it doesn’t sound like Marcus at all.

‘Come on, you don’t mean that.’

‘No, I do. I missed every call, Luca. Every call, for fucking what? For the Michael? Do you realise how dumb that is?’

Luca twitches, flexing his shoulders back to correct the posture that had never really sunk in the first place. A nervous thing. Something he picked up in culinary school. ‘It only feels like that now,’ he says.

Marcus scoffs.

‘Sleep on it.’

‘Don’t think that’s happening anytime soon.’

‘Yeah, cause you’ve gotta get off that bucket first.’ It’s like taking another exam, he realises, trying to balance hazelnut swirls onto set custard while your hands are shaking. The balance is everything, get it wrong and he’ll chase Marcus away, just like he did with Frankie. Jokey, but understanding. Patient, but moving him still. ‘Go home, Marcus, see how you feel about it in the morning.’

‘I can’t,' he stresses.

And, shit, he forgot that detail. Somehow, in a conversation all about it. ‘Your mum.’ He sighs. ‘Sorry, I should’ve.’ Forget it. Recover, adapt, fix it from another angle. ‘Is Syd still around?’

‘Think so.’

‘Have you told her?’

He lets that question sit for a while, lets the street noise creep back through the phone in place of his answer. Which Instagram lovingly turns into static, really, radio noise that makes Luca wince. 

Then Marcus says, blank and tired, with a thick voice that needs to be cleared, ‘I think I’m gonna go actually. I should go.’ 

‘Oh.’ It takes a moment for him to recover. ‘Yeah, course, do what you need to do.’

‘Thank-you, you know, for picking up.’

‘Don’t worry about it.’

‘And the gift. It means a lot.’

‘Sure, yeah. I’m glad you like it.’

‘Night, man.’

It’s four in the morning, but he says it back, slipping it in right before the call ends. With that bitter little tone in his ear. If that was an exam, he'd've failed. Maybe. Dropped the details and put his thumb through the layers. 

‘Idiot,’ he mutters, tossing the phone onto the end of his bed. ‘When my dad died. Fuck me.’

Marcus will never call again. He’ll never call him again, actually, not until the funeral’s done and he’s starting to heal from it. Why would he? Who wants to hear that? This is the worst, mate, good luck! 

Christ.

He should’ve said nothing, should’ve waited for Marcus to take the lead and gone from there. Not everyone wants what Frankie wanted. Talking for the sake of talking. 

But he’s running late now, and the t-shirt he’s dragged from the drawers is still sitting around his biceps, waiting to be pulled on. Work first. Work first, then fix it with Marcus. Send another gift, or something, book a plane if you have to. 

He puts his head through the hole and reaches for a pair of socks as the t-shirt rolls down his stomach. Then it’s cologne. Hairbrush. The watch he wears, just to take off and store in his locker once he gets there. Everything he needs from this room, before moving on to the next. Besides his phone, of course, which is waiting on the bed still.

When he reaches it, the screen’s lit already, awake with messages he hadn’t noticed.

Going home, it reads. Thanks for talking me through it. 

It’s in his hand now, staring us from his palm, and telling him that Marcus is still typing. 

And typing.

And typing.

Then, finally, 

Sorry about your dad. 

His chest deflates, held breath escaping at last. Long time ago, he types back. Shout me if you need anything. 

There’s no hesitation this time. Just, Cool. Keep the couch free for me, yeah?

Yeah, sure. All yours.

>>>part two

#marcus x luca #the bear fanfiction

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hello!

Impressive anon here!

I am sorry to be a bother but I put something in your ask on Monday and I don’t think you have responded to it. It’s not a problem if you’ve been busy and all that like I fully understand. But in case anything I said on it made you feel uncomfortable I genuinely am so sorry! You obviously don’t have to respond if it did, but I was just wondering if you got the ask.

Idk I feel like it’s reassuring to know that I’ve let out some thoughts to a real person (you) and not just typed up on my phone.

But again I fully understand if you’ve been busy or simply don’t want to respond! You don’t even have to respond to this, you can just post like a random emoji on a post you make and I’ll know you’ve read it.

Sorry!

Enjoy your day and again thank you for all the help you have given me! I truely appreciate it! ♡♡

Hi hon!

Now I'm like really glad i started a spreadsheet lol. Last time I responded to you was April 3rd, and I haven't received anything since! I'm so glad you asked, because I would hate for you to feel like you bothered me or like I'm ignoring you! Would you mind resending what you sent? It sounds like it didn't go through, I'm so sorry!

And seriously, if this happens with anyone else, I never don't respond to advice asks, unless someone specifically says I shouldn't. I do my very best to get back to everyone within 48 hours too, so if you don't see my reply after that, feel free to send something else or re-send. You're never bothering me <3

#ask #asks #ask cas #impressive anon

[koinotame]

\o/

hi! it's me, nana / koinotame!

if you're wondering why i went inactive and then deleted, my mental health kind of (really) tanked... and i ended up deleting my blog in a fit.

it's getting better bit by bit though! and i've been wanting to get back into writing (and talking abt my unhinged/yan ideas i can't really talk to anyone else abt), so. here i am! for now, at least

as for my previously posted writing, there's some good news and some bad news: the bad news is that everything i wrote directly into tumblr (99% of snippets, a lot of ask answers, most exact content warnings, etc) is gone. the slightly less bad news is that iirc there were very very few posts of mine that weren't reblogged by anyone at all, so they're probably still out there? feel free to send them my way if you find any and i'll rb them. @/midnight-remembrance also has reblogged a couple of them! there's a couple snippets i have saved in some places, so i might repost those on my own as i find them, but there's very few of those. the good news is that anything longer (proper writing — oneshots, hcs, yan alphabet responses and so on, prompt responses, etc) is safely backed up where i originally wrote it! some of it is also on my ao3, which is the same username. feel free to send me asks about any you'd like to see again and i'll repost them! i might not post them if i feel too embarrassed about/wish i hadn't posted them, and i might rewrite/heavily edit some of them, but i think there's only a handful that fall into the former category and none of them were particularly popular. either way, no harm in asking!

as for some other updates: i'm a little divided on whether i want to keep posting explicit nsfw or not so we'll see. i might just keep it out of main tags. idk yet. regardless of what decision i make, this blog is still strictly 18+ and that will not be changing. since we can reply from sideblogs now, this is a sideblog and not my main now. why? sometimes i prefer to check up on a blog frequently instead of following them for a couple of reasons, but this felt very awkward when they were following me. so this being a sideblog relieves a bit of that stress. if this makes it sound like i have severe brain worms, it's because i do. to that effect though, if we interact every so often feel free to consider us mutuals regardless of whether or not i'm actually following you =w=b tbh i.............. am not really into genshin anymore. i might post about it here and there but i just Do Not (really) Care about it anymore. scara aside to some degree i also have no clue what's going on post inazuma lol whatever projects or commitments to writing or etc i had made beforehand. i forgot all of them so just pretend that never happened ok? ok i'll also probably be posting more sparsely, but we'll see! and (this is obviously the most important bit) i have no clue where i put the mika edit so we're back to my og classic pfp. the header scales terribly and is temporary, please ignore that too

all that aside, as a treat for anyone who sees this in time,

*roughly 6/22 done, but fairly quick to write. roughly one paragraph per character (sneak peek line: "it's not too hard to be discreet with his unique magic when someone really deserves to fall face down a flight of stairs. or three. oopsie. odd they don't remember it, huh? well, he had nothing to do with that.") **more realistic isn't quite the right word(s)... probably won't post this one to the main tags regardless. won't be doing all of the characters (only important/relevant ones) and won't be writing more about/expanding on, so this one is just like. a one off experiment sort of thing. overall less violent than most takes on the au + leans a bit (or lot, depending on how you look at it) more on the religious aspect of self aware aus. i wrote a couple paragraphs a while ago, then rewrote them, but i'll only finish/post them if there's interest for it (sneak peek line: "aether has deluded himself and cast You aside entirely on his own—and when You finally grace them with Your real presence, zhongli is certain aether will be the first to fall from Your grace.")

i have one other new thing immediately ready for posting that'll get posted in a couple of days but that one's pretty silly

#koinotame #and hi to the three people that found this blog before i posted this o/ #long post #i ended up writing a lot. ehem. #<- the type to always have trouble getting essays down to the max word limit #if nobody ends up seeing this. well. it'll be here still when i post some actual writing #q

[iciclesses]

I forgot to mention, but if anything I send ever makes you uncomfy, please feel free to delete it. I know my stuff is really REALLY intense and I don’t share it with pretty much anyone because I know it’s a lot! So please don’t feel pressured to answer any of my things that you don’t want to. I completely understand!

Remember to eat something, take your meds, drink some water, use the bathroom, stretch, and take a deep breath. Your well being is way more important to me than any kink!

~bloodlust

BLOODLUST YOU LIVE IN MY BRAIN YOU HAVE YET TO MISS OR SAY SOMETHING THAT IS TOO MUCH FOR ME I've been working on adding my own stuff for my reply and I'm trying to hard to do you proud !

the ask you sent me I literally am so in love with you(r writing) shut up!!! I will never ever delete an ask from you, though this does bring up what I did want to get general consensus on. I've had a ton of people request to have trigger/cw tags at the top of posts so people don't accidentally read something they didn't mean to. When it comes to asks, I can't expect you or any of my other lovely anons to like. Know to add trigger tags at the start of your asks. So I'm trying to think of the best way to post your amazing toe curling, life changing, blood pressure raising, nectar from the heavens above writing without having people accidentally read it when they aren't prepared/don't mean to.

IDK if you or anyone else had any input, but just know at some point one way or another I am posting your writing and my response to it bc you're my favorite ever and the world deserves to see your wonderfully fucky ideas

(Also answering this did in fact remind me to take my meds this morning, so thank you ♡)

#noel.haps #bloodlust what do u want for christmas (if u celebrate) #be fr #also seriously tho if anyone has anything they want to add #i dont know how to post darker asks without accidentally fucking up someones day

[p-artsypants]

Blurb #11

I'm going to try to share 70 blurbs from my WIPs and unfinished fics to celebrate reaching 70 posted fics! To help with this endeavor, please feel free to send me a word or a fandom you know I write for, and I'll share the blurb. IDK if I'll get 70 prompts, but let's try it! Send as many as you want!

“Rough day?"

“Yeah…I have a lot on my mind, trying to figure out what I’m going to do after I graduates. I haven’t gotten any replies from colleges. But…I don’t even know if I can go to school. I can’t just leave class or work if there’s an akuma attack. I just…I don’t know what to do.” she sighed.

“Among other things. Something…something happened, and shook my life plans. So I’m kind of lost.”

“I know what you mean. Sort of. That’s why I came out tonight. To think. I was hoping I’d run into you, because you always have a solution. but…I don’t want to bug you if you’re already struggling.”

“No no, actually. I’d like to think about something else for a while It might give me perspective. Lay it on me. What’s up?”

“I…I have the opposite problem. I know exactly what I’m going to do. Where I’m going to school, what I’m majoring in, where I’ll work…who I’m going to marry…” He starts crying.

“Do you not want that?”

“No. None of it is what I want. I…I just found out I’m getting married in a a little less than a month. She’s awful, my lady. She’s cruel, she hurts me and never leaves me alone, and she lies—“ He wipes his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

She wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “You don’t need to apologize. This is serious.”

“I’ll say! I—I might have to give up being Chat Noir! I can’t get a minute to myself! The only reason I’m here is because she finally went home for the night! If I can’t be Chat Noir I…I…” He covered his mouth with his hand. What he was about to say was, ‘I’d kill myself.”

Ladybug inferred that anyways. “Who’s making you do this?”

“My father. He thinks she’s wonderful, and the only one ‘worthy’ of me or something…at the risk of exposing something…I’m from a pretty wealthy family.”

“So…this is an arranged marriage.”

“Yes.”

“Have you told your father? That she’s cruel to you?”

“He doesn’t believe me. He said men can’t be abused. I don’t know what to do!”

Ladybug hugged him a little tighter. “…you’ll have to marry someone else.”

“In three days? I…I don’t know if I could pull that off. I have friends that are girls, but…I couldn’t ask them to do that.” He thought of Chloe first, because she would agree pretty quickly. So would Kagami. But he was fairly certain that they also would be attached to him every minute of the day and the Chat Noir problem wouldn’t be solved. He also thought about Marinette. Because she was a real friend, and kind and sweet and cute, and he could see himself with her. But it was unfair to ask. “I just…if I wasn’t Chat Noir, it would be easier, but if I lived with someone, it would be impossible to sneak out for patrol. I have a friend…she would probably be cool with it, but…I just don’t want to ask her to give up her life so quickly.”

Ladybug sat quietly. Thinking through everything she had heard, everything she had gone through today.

Adrien was officially off the market. There was nothing that Marinette could do to solve that crisis.

But with Chat…his partnership and defeating Hawkmoth was her number one priority as Ladybug.

And so, she had a hard decision to make. It was crazy, and wickedly selfless. Maybe even a little stupid.

“Marry me.” She stated.

He choked. “Wha—What?!”

“Marry me.” She said again, gravely serious. “I know you’re Chat. So…we can leave together for patrols. And who better to impress your father than the very famous and heroic Ladybug?”

“Wait wait wait…you’re suggesting I marry you, not as whoever you are under the mask, but as Ladybug? Like, in the suit?”

“I know it’s crazy, but…yes.”

He choked out a hysterical laugh, getting up to his feet. “It’s more than crazy! It’s insane! How…how is that—“ He fell silent, pacing over the rooftop. Each click of his boot echoing in the quiet night. “It’s genius.”

Ladybug smiled slightly at that.

“But if everyone finds out your my wife, won’t I be a target?”

“Yeah, but you’re Chat Noir. If anyone can protect themselves, it would be you.”

He opened his mouth to rebuttal, but had none.

Why was he arguing about this again?

“But My Lady…what about the other guy?”

“Other guy?”

“The guy you’re in love with?”

She nodded, realizing who he meant. “He’s…he’s engaged. And after all this time, I wasn’t even able to talk to him properly. So, I’m going to let him go.”

“And…you could be happy with me?”

“If there’s anyone I could be happy with, it’s you.”

#fanfiction #miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #ml #marinette dupain cheng #ladybug #chat noir #ladynoir #70 for 70 celebration

[keeperofthesunandmoon]

Hey, anon who was asking about sending feedback here. Doing it not anon this time just to make any replies needed easier. Apologies in advance for the wall of text, I've tried to condense it, but I'm not the best at being concise. Also sorry if any of this has been brought up before.

First a couple technical issues I encountered. In chapter 7 I got the part about my mom taking care of me while sick, even though my parents were killed last chapter, then inversely when I went through again and saved them the dialogue option "“All my goodness died when he took my parents.” was available to choose.

Anyway onto the juicy stuff. So for the most part, I really liked the game so far, I thought it is a really good continuation of the story, and I'm definitely excited for more. But I obviously do have some notes, so here they are.

1) Being able to detect heartbeats isn't actually an accurate way of detecting bluffs (or lies in general). Heartrate raises if a person is excited or scared, and a good liar would be calm while lying. Plus with poker specifically, knowing your opponent is bluffing is only part of the equation, you still have to have a good hand, or be able to bluff yourself.

2) I feel like there should be the option to be opposed to control magic due to trauma rather than just general moral opposition, depending on the choices made. Like, at the very least, any MC unfortunate enough to have Julian Anderson as their birth father, probably has more reason to be averse to control magic than just "mind control bad cause it takes away free will".

On the same note, there are multiple instances where without player input, your character either uses control magic, considers using it, or sits there while someone else casually uses it. Which like, even trauma aside, if I’ve been picking all the “I think control magic is morally evil” options it seems weird my character would just casually use it to make someone forget a conversation, or be fine with their friends using it to get past airport security.

It also kinda sucks, for the above reasons, that in regards to the screening, your only options are let someone use control magic on you (whether or not you resist) or compel them first. Like I said, I feel like my MC would be very traumatized by the whole concept of control magic, and would very much not be on board with either of these options.

3) The jar of holy oil felt a bit like it came out of nowhere. Like I previously got the impression that holy oil was pretty hard to get your hands on, even for someone with the MCs connections, but then you just like have a jar of it in your bag I guess, no real explanation as to how it got there. Also IDK if this was intentional misdirection or not, so sorry in advance if it is, but because it’s first mentioned as an “unbreakable jam jar” directly after talking about the homemade snow globes (which are often made from jars), I thought the jam jar was the snow globe, up until you actually use it.

4)This one’s kind of a legacy issue from the previous games, so IDK how fixable it is at this point, but basically the game feels like it's in an odd situation when it comes to the MC, that I can best describe as being nonbinary inclusive, but trans exclusive. The game lets you choose the name/pronouns you want, but then the flashbacks just assume your character was still using the same ones back when they were a toddler (obviously there are people irl who do come out at a pretty young age, but, at least in my experience, that's the exception rather than the rule). Like obviously something to account for that could be added, but IDK if you can like update already published games, and if not adding it to the third game would probably introduce some weirdness, so IDK.

5) I’m confused as to what a “stereotypical drakaina” would be cause like a drakaina isn’t really like a thing in pop culture the same way something like angels and demons are, and the word itself is literally just the feminine form of the Ancient Greek word for dragon or serpent. Would it just be dressing up as a dragon? I realize this one's pretty nitpicky, I’m just confused.

6) In the dream sequence in chapter 8, the game seems to just like assume the MC and RO are able to have a biological kid together. I know that both it’s a dream sequence and also a setting with magic, so it’s not really a plot hole or anything per say, but I think taking that into mind, and maybe adding some text for situations where that might be in question, to explain that would be a good idea.

7) "…for the fact that the worst crime they’ve ever committed is jaywalking." I’m fairly certain forging a birth certificate is also a crime. /s

Thank you for the feedback! I've made some edits to earlier chapters based on it for next update

[aspecpolls]

Hey so as the anon who sent the poll on how everyone felt about finding out they were aro, I have two things.

1) hi mod, if I forget some folks and end up not creating poll options for them, feel free to just edit it in. I really wouldn’t mind, as an aro allo I get that erasure sucks and I’d rather be corrected on it than just have it slide. That’s my take tho, I can’t speak for everyone who sends something in. Probably not helping that I’m staying on anon but eh idk.

2) everyone else, ye I realize that those three were kinda reductive categories, I was just trying to make it quick and knew I couldn’t fit the full range of potential thoughts and feelings in a tumblr poll, mostly I asked that thinking of how many times I (an aroallo who felt relief at the realization) have encountered other aros who were genuinely upset about it like “I’ll never get to feel the feelings my allo friends experience" as well as the allos who are like "I'm sorry you'll never feel ~true love~" (don't be, in fact keep it away from me) and the ones who are like "don't worry, you'll find The One some day!" (I cannot express in words alone how much I do not want that). So on some level I was wondering how many aros felt what I did and how many were like the ones I met. But also wanted something to show just how wrong arophobic allos are in acting like we're pitiful because surely I wasn't the only one who was just super glad to figure out I did not have to date anyone ever. But also wondered how much being aroace vs aroallo affected it? Judging from poll results so far, it doesn't, so I might try again later with a poll that doesn't specify if you're ace, allo, or neither and just puts it in a numbers-based range of positive vs negative feelings with encouragement to expand on it in replies or reblogs. Thank you to everyone who voted and sorry to everyone who didn't get included in the last one.

.

#not a poll #commentary #anon

[curieklei]

hiii so english isn't my first language and i'm learning more about gender and trans stuff and if i might be trans or something (i've been told i sound agender?? but that feels wrong), and something that confuses me, so i'm asking around abt it… "woman" used to simply denote afab, right? like a body type of ppl with a biological (not surgical) vagina & estrogen puberty. like a female dog. ppl say that it reduces women to their genitals, but what about with other animals? like female cat, female horse, etc, just bc we say "oh she's a girl" or "oh i have a male dog" doesn't mean we're saying they're only their genitals in that case, right…? a bitch is just a female dog, that's why it's a misogynistic word. misogyny is based on how ppl see someone without a penis as lesser, bc they don't have the power to forcibly penetrate and feel genital pleasure for it, they can't impregnate, they're "just a hole" etc. like so much of misogyny is just body-specific. the misogyny transfems experience seems terrible but also conditional? bc if they're found out to be amab they're treated as creepy men, so they then stop experiencing misogyny, they just face usually homophobia. meanwhile bio women (and transmascs who don't transition) have no exit door to the misogyny unless they transition and pass perfectly as male or something, and historically that wasn't an option. to me man & woman have always been neutral body types until i came across trans stuff, and i think the idea of gendered brains sounds sexist af. like gender seems like bullshit, i see me being a woman as just like being a female cat, i don't have ~womanly~ vibes in my brain, i was just born female and that's the least important thing about me, but male society made it weird. why should gender continue to be a thing? what does gender actually mean, if sexism was to be eradicated? is it bad if i view my womanhood as just a body type? most cis people i've talked to view their "gender" like this, as just a body type, like any other animal. they don't "feel" like one, they just have the body and aren't dysphoric about it. they might not always like it, but they don't have dysphoria about it, so they just… are. is that transphobic? i've heard mixed thoughts about it from trans ppl & activists, i'm just curious. feel free to ignore this lol ;;

Edit: A person in the replies has informed me that those may be are terf talking points disguised as questions to avoid suspicion so take this anon with a grain of salt. I'm keeping this post just in case anon is genuinely curious or something.

From what I see, reducing the societal importance of biological sex is indeed what's slowly happening, but it's definitely not in the same stage everywhere. It takes years for a person to unlearn something they were told their whole life, it takes generations for biological sex to lose importance.

I'll go over your questions:

Why should gender continue to be a thing?

I think you meant biological sex here. It's important to keep a little bit of it for medical purposes. Also imo it's possible for a culture to give it importance without ending up with a system that makes people feel awful sometimes.

What does gender actually mean, if sexism is to be eradicated?

I guess it'll just be a trait of a person in a similar way skin color is a trait of someone's body but like, with way more dimensions. It's kinda hard to put rules around this. Maybe it's just an answer to the question "What am I?".

Is it bad I view my womanhood as just a body type?

Lol do what you want it's your womanhood, your body and your you. There's nothing bad here and you're free to decide for yourself.

Is [not feeling much gender about your body] transphobic?

Doesn't feel transphobic to me, but anyone reading this is free to give their own take on this and the rest of what you said.

Idk what else to say so thanks for the ask and have a safe self discovery journey! Feel free to dm me or send another ask if you want to talk or me to add something to this.

#curieasks #curietalks #gender #discussion #biological sex #trans #sexism #long post

[kiss-me-cill-me]

(anon because I'm too shy and idk if my idea is dumb) Would you ever write a small fic where Emmett is a total stranger to the Abbott family...He is running away from the creatures, is injured, and Lee and Evelyn hide him. Because of his extreme distrust (trauma from bandits?), he fights back and risks making noise, so they have to silence him and tie him up. Then they (mostly Lee) tends to his injuries and looks after him until he's well enough to leave, and that is how they become neighbours.

Dearest anon, firstly, your idea is not at all "dumb" - if it's something you want to read, then that in itself makes it valuable 😉❤️

It's been a little while since I tried to write anything besides 2nd person x reader, so I might be a little bit rusty, but I'm more than happy to give this a shot!

I do have a couple of quick questions though, and you can feel free to send in another anon ask with the answers. If I don't reply to that one, it just means I'm keeping it in my inbox to remind me to write it! Fair warning also that it might take me a while, as I'm horribly behind on requests at the moment, but I will get to you all! 💕

For this fic, would you want all the characters to have the same backstories as they do in canon (aside from of course being strangers to each other)? What I mean is stuff like Emmett having a family but losing them; Lee and Evelyn having their kids with them; possibly Evelyn being pregnant depending on when this takes place; everyone living in the same town, etc.

And follow-up question to that, do you have a preference for the timeframe of when this takes place? Like, early on in the apocalypse, around the events of the first movie, around the events of the second, or something else?

Thank you for requesting; I always have fun writing things that are a little outside of my usual "wheelhouse" 😄

#lemmy talks #anon ask #Emmett request #(tagging so I can find this later lol)

[annesthaeticc]

Sweet November | Dr Strange x Fem!Reader

Sweet November : Chapter One-October 30

| Series Summary: "One month." Stephen said, his gaze intense. He raised his hand, offered it for you to shake. "One month." you agreed, and shook his hand. The sign of a closed deal. Then he smiled at you, and from that instant, you realized, you just broke rule number one; no falling in love.

| Chapter Warning: fluff (i guess? idk HAHA)

| Word Count: 1451 words (keeping it short these days or else i'll run out of creative juices T^T)

| A/N: heya! hope you like this! there'll be more to come don't worry! chapter 2 is already in the works! if u wanna be tagged, please join my taglist (link below) or send me a message! comments, hearts, REBLOGS will help me write <3

"YOU MADE A MATCH!" 

How could four little harmless words cause you excitement and despair at the same time? You'll never know. You weren't one for online dating, you thought it was ridiculous to meet someone through that way. Just exactly what had happened to the traditional way of courting and romance? Strolls in the park? Secret and lingering gazes from across the room? Ballroom dancing? That sort of stuff? Guess it faded along with the era, or maybe you need to stop watching period films and getting your standards way up because— 

"1 New Message" your phone beeped. You quickly swipe to open the dating app to view your match's text. 

"I'm on my way." 

Thank fuck for that. You've been waiting for almost forty-five minutes for him now and you were already having second thoughts about meeting him. But you decided against it and waited. He was a doctor after all, something must've come up. 

All you know about your date is that his name is Stephen V. Whatever 'V' means, you'll never know. His profile flashed a picture of him wearing a classic black suit, and tie. You immediately swiped right the moment you saw his picture, you're a sucker for men wearing suits. He was in his early thirties. And he has an MD, and a PhD. Hotshot doctor, big extra points for your high standards. 

The faint tinkling chime of the restaurant's door made you glance and turn around. And there he was. You watched as he looked around him and down on his phone. Should you wave and catch his attention? Or should you meet him and introduce yourself to save him the trouble of looking for you? You opted to stay back in your seat and compose yourself. 

Eventually he found you. He stood by your table and you immediately shot up from your seat to offer your hand. 

"Hi. I'm Diana." you said, smiling.  Quickly, he pocketed his phone and shook your hand with his free hand. He was holding his lab jacket and case with his other hand. 

"Stephen. Nice to meet you Diana." he returned the sentiment with a pleasant enough smile. 

He took a seat across from you and you passed him the menu. He scanned it quietly and settled it back down. 

"Are you ready to order?" he asked you. 

"Yes, thank you," you replied. He called the waitress and he let you say your order first, saving him for last. 

When the waitress awkwardly walked away with blushing cheeks, you stifled your giggle. You looked at him and found him smirking. 

"So,"

"Yeah," he cleared his throat. Obviously finding the whole date ordeal a bit out of his specialty. 

"Tinder, huh?" you chuckled, and he did the same. Then he quizzes you on how you came upon registering into the dating app. 

"It's ridiculous, really. I always loathed the idea of meeting someone online. But I was feeling particularly lonely one night and decided, 'heck, maybe I should try it'" you said. Then you asked him the same question. 

"Well uh, can I be honest with you?" he said with a smirk playing on his lips. 

"Of course." 

"I was hoping to meet someone, a fake girlfriend perhaps, for me to take to some medical galas that I'm attending this month," he replied and you gaped at him. 

The conversation took an interesting turn, and your iced teas haven't even arrived at your table yet. 

"Couldn't you just, I don't know, date someone and ask them to be your girlfriend?" you said, hope laced your voice. 

"I don't do that," he chuckled. 

"Don't do what exactly?" 

"Relationships. The boyfriend and girlfriend thing," he spat out the words ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’ like it was disgusting. 

"So you'd rather have a fake one?" 

"Yeah. That way I'm not committing myself to something serious," he replied. He gave you a tight smile and instantly you felt yourself become a bit irritated. 

He looks so stupidly handsome and he has committment issues. You instantly regret logging into Tinder in the first place. You look away and sigh. 

"What?" you heard him ask you. 

"Oh it's uh," you distractedly muttered under your breath. Without thinking, you started to gather your jacket and your bag. 

"I'm sorry, I can't do this." you said, gave him a tight-lipped smile and moved away. 

You were halfway through the restaurant floor when you heard him follow you, "Diana! Wait!" You glanced at him then turned to the exit. 

"Don't you want to hear all about the deal?" he asked as he stood beside you. You ignored him and continued to look for a taxi. 

"Deal? No, I'm not interested," 

"Please? Look I'm really desperate and I—" 

"Really? Well sadly, I'm not signing up for your fake relationship thingy because—" 

"You believe in true love, is that it? Diana, you'll never meet him in a dating site," 

"Guess you're right." you started to walk down the street, in hopes of avoiding him. Seems that he really is desperate. 

"Why don't you try? Just hear me out," he came up next to you and caught up with your pace. 

"Okay, I'm listening but that doesn't mean I'll agree to it," you gave in. 

"I'm fully booked this whole month, charity dinners, award ceremonies, galas, all that stuff. I need someone to take to the events. Look, I'll buy the dresses, the shoes, everything you need on the night of the event. Just come with me, hang on my arm for a few hours, eat some fine dinner and wine, then I'll take you home." he ended his speech. 

You gave him a sideway glance and continued to walk down the pavement. He was still walking beside you, as if he's waiting for your answer. But then the first drops of rain started to fall, you halted and started to rummage in your bag for your umbrella. And of all the days you forgot your umbrella, it was today. You quietly groaned and you heard him chuckle. 

"Let me at least drive you home." he said, a smirk teased his lips. You glared at him in annoyance, attempting to keep yourself feeling that way. 

But his eyes, bright blue, shone underneath the lights of the city. You figured, at that moment, you were going to give in. You sighed, rolled your eyes, then acquiesced. 

"Where's your car?" you asked, eyebrows raised. 

"Parked down there." he pointed at the entrance of an hospital's underground parking. 

You looked to your side and realized you both stopped at the very front of New York's Metro General Hospital. It was an easy enough guess that that's where he's working. 

Eventually, you found yourself fastening the seat belt across your body. You sank back into the smooth leather seat as he eased the car into drive. The silence in the car was filled by the stereo turned into the right volume. Quite obviously he's a fan of Pink Floyd. 

"Say I was to agree to your plan," you cleared your throat as the bass of Another Brick On The Wall quietly vibrated in your ears. He pressed a button on the wheel, turning the volume lower. 

"How is it going to work?" you continued. 

"Well, I've drawn up a detailed schedule, a calendar marked and we'll have to discuss it of course. I'll only need you on the night of events," 

"Come over to my office tomorrow, we can talk about it, I'll have my assistant book you 1 in the afternoon."

"I haven't even agreed to anything yet you're already bossing me around, is this how it’s going to work?" you joked. He cocked his head to the side to give you a look. You bit your lip and looked away. 

When the car arrived at your street, it slowed, then you quietly asked him to pull up. He maneuvered the car to park and you clicked the seatbelt off. You looked at him to say thanks, but he beat you to it. 

"Thanks for meeting me. It's fine if you don't agree. I'll just uh, think of another way to solve my little problem." he said. Then he smiled. 

"Thanks for the ride, Stephen." you said with a smile. This time a genuine one. You grasped the handle and clicked it open. 

You climbed out, but before you closed it, before you let the chance escape you, you bent down a bit, and said, "You can tell your assistant to book me an appointment with you tomorrow, 1 in the afternoon." 

This time your true smile was met by his own genuine and beautiful smile. Or at least you felt that it was.

SERIES MASTERLIST | READ THE NEXT CHAPTER →

[ JOIN MY TAGLIST ] [ MAIN NAVIGATION ] [ BUY ME A KO - FI ]

TAGLIST: @migurin @damiensoda @inas-thing @peachywoong @ruevz @sammiisnotonfire @srapalestina @winchestersgirl222 @taramaria @alexag-barnes @sleutherclaw @willowfairy @vexedvalerie @lovecleastrange @evelynrosestuff @dragonqueen89 @sobeautifullyobsessed @geeky-politics-46 @azu21 @getlostsquidward @bubu890 @strangefilms @ice-ksk @my-beel @doctorswitch @josiestark @lizzy-g9 @tuitiononlivings @winchaser1990 @swds @andrewgarfieldsloml @princessnnylzays @jocktears @xoxabs88xox @sherlockstrangewolf @softmullet @andysnewgroove @the-royal-petals @lostfleurs @cumberbitch @whosgwyneth @strangeobsessed @slvtforstr4nge @just--a--magpie @lucimorningst4r @gracecaldwellx @jyessaminereads @dancerpanda04 @starryeddie @cemak @valoaes @paola-carter @siredlust @stupidthoughtsinwriting @frostandflamesfanfic

#dr strange x reader #dr strange x you #dr strange x oc #dr strange x original character #dr strange x fem!reader #doctor strange x reader #doctor strange x y/n #doctor strange x female reader #doctor strange x oc #dr strange fanfiction #doctor strange fanfiction #dr stephen strange fanfic #dr strange fanfic #dr stephen strange #dr strange #doctor strange #doctor stephen strange #dr strange smut #dr strange angst #dr strange fluff #doctor strange smut #doctor strange angst #doctor strange fluff #doctor strange in the multiverse of madness #dr strange mcu #doctor strange mcu #marvel mcu #mcu fanfiction #mcu smut #mcu angst

[talkfantasytome]

Hi there you absolutely amazing human being! I hope you’re doing great 💕 I’ve had this idea for a Nessian canon one shot in my head for the longest time but I can’t write for my life, so I figured you (being the amazing writer that you are) might be able to make use of it. I don’t know if you’re currently taking any prompts/ideas but I have a horrible memory so I decided to send it before I forgot.

Ok, so the idea is Cassian gets back from a very hard and brutal mission completely numb. Nesta is obviously scared and worried because she has never seen him like that. She takes care of him in the usual ways; feeds him, bathes him, gets him to sleep, etc… all very soft. During all this he doesn’t speak nor acknowledges her presence because he’s that numb. The next morning he’s still the same and Nesta asks him what else can she do to help and Cassian explains he needs physical touch and reassurance. Flash forward they have the softest angstiest and fluffiest sex ever and Nesta focuses on taking care of him and his needs and it’s all very fluffy.

Feel free to change absolutely everything you want! Thank you so much! You really are amazing 💕

First of all, thank you so much, that's so sweet!! 🥺 💕 Second of all, I love this, and I know it's taken me a hot second (or 50,000,000) to reply, but I just needed the time and right mindset to get to this cause this is a bigger thing, and not something I can just bust out quickly. And I didn't want to reply until I was close-ish.

I was hoping to have this for today's SJM Romance Week day but, well...I don't think that's going to happen. I'm trying, but I don't have tons of time to write these days, and my motivation has been very meh lately.

ANYWAY! I do hope to get this out this week, but whether I do or don't, thought I could at least tease this a bit with a snipped! 😄 I am making changes to this, and I can't promise actual smut as I haven't been in a place for that, and idk if I will be when I get to that point. But I doooo promise fluff and slight angst, of course, their love language of physical touch. 💕

This time, something registered in his eyes. The faintest twinkle that said he did see her. And for a moment she let the relief flood her, but only a moment. Because as quick as the twinkle came it faded again.

"Please, Cass," she breathed, holding the bite of steak up. "Eat for me?"

He lifted a hand a placed it over hers, guiding the steak into his open mouth. After that first bite, he took the fork in his own hand and began to work on the meal.

Nesta let out the breath she'd been holding and then sat beside him, keeping one hand on him at all times, her fingers curved around his broad shoulder. She stayed clear of his wings for the moment, unsure how he'd react in his current state to even an accidental brush against them.

#nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #love languages #physical touch #sjmromanceweek2023 #snippet #nesta x cassian #cassian x nesta

[aroaceking]

I literally cannot tell if you actually want me to answer any of the things you asked but I'm posting the entire comment and I will answer it. I'm going to be very honest and address that I am autistic so if I've taken the fact there were questions too literally I am actually sorry, I have no intention of requesting engagement from you if you are not actually trying to discuss it with me.

Reblogs are off because I don't really feel comfortable with reblogs when I'm going to address some of my trauma, but you're free to reply to this or send an ask (I think ask word limits are lower now?) if you wish to reply.

tw because I don't know how to explain any of my things without addressing a lot of this: transphobia tw, transmisogyny tw, intersexism tw, homophobia tw, racism tw, csa tw, cocsa tw, childhood sexual trauma tw, medical abuse tw, ableism tw, idk like literally it's just my life idk how to give it enough labels to give fair warning.

under a read more because it's long

@fite-club

okay. there’s a lot to unpack here. i’m gonna first address the “stop sexualizing asexuality” thing— asexuality is about sexual attraction, it is inherently a sexual topic in nature. but you’re alarmingly wrong about something here, and it’s the “recognizing ways I was different from my peers” part as a 14 year old, you WEREN’T different from your peers for not experiencing sexual attraction. MOST 14 year olds don’t. you mention trauma in your past— this is extremely relevant. why do you believe that the majority of 14 year olds were sexual, who told you that? ike, yeah, hypothetically someone who identifies as ace at 14 and experiences sexual attraction at age 18 can change their label from asexual to allosexual. but will they ACTUALLY do that, though? or will they just call themselves a sex-favorable asexual? when you make lacking attraction a part of your identity, what happens to your sense of identity if you DO experience attraction? also i need to point out that there are literal biological functions that are not done developing until you are over 18. your body and brain and hormones are still growing. you definitely cannot say with any certainty that anyone below the age of 16 knows they experience sexual attraction or not finally i need you to understand that by emphasizing “hey, it’s actually completely fine and normal to not be interested in sex at all when you’re in high school” it actually helps prevent teens from being sexually abused. “most teens are allosexual” is NOT the message you want to be spreading.

"asexuality is about sexual attraction, it is inherently a sexual topic in nature."

this is part of what I feel most uncomfortable with. it is innately a conversation about sexuality, but that, too, to me, feels simplified to state as 'sexual' when people are constantly equating sexual with 'having sex' or 'having sexual desires'. developmentally it's a lot more complex than that, especially when you don't use a split attraction model or thoroughly separate/classify all aspects of orientation. I understand why people may break down their identities into the tiniest boxes they can imagine, but I actually don't navigate it that way at all.

I'm deeply uncomfortable with the idea that discussing sexuality is sexual. I know I'm repeating myself, I just am not sure if I'm clear. It's also deeply unsettling to me to see people, of any orientation, act like it's sexual for a child to state if they like boys or girls or whatever else. Or how people act like it's sexual for a child to have a gender identity separate from their assignment.

I will acknowledge the assignment I was given had impact on my feelings on this matter, I was hypersexualized throughout my childhood for being intersex, for publicly going also from 'boy' to 'girl', for my race. I understand that these add to my experiences and are part of why I was reacted to the way I was. That it was a catch-22 because if I had liked boys, I would've been performing gender wrong and if I had liked girls, I would've been performing gender wrong, and that no matter what space I took up, it would be 'incorrect.'

But this experience is mine. I was doomed to be sexualized no matter what I did in the environment I was a part of, and part of that relates to this idea that gender and sexuality in children when 'off the norm' is innately sexual. That if a child expresses a relationship to gender or orientation outside of boxes defined for them that it's somehow sexual.

I tried to define it to an anon earlier also but developmentally I am including things like how children will play-roles as well. A lot of my friends learned gender and orientation through how they wanted to do pretend games or how they felt unfulfilled by them. This isn't sexual, this isn't weird, it's a normal part of development. This includes children picking and pointing out fictional characters or celebrities to admire or joke about wanting to marry/have as a boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever. This includes the way children will also explore themselves through putting claims out like 'so and so is my boyfriend now' or whatever.

"you mention trauma in your past— this is extremely relevant. why do you believe that the majority of 14 year olds were sexual, who told you that?"

I know the trauma in my past is 'relevant.' I'm sure if I had not been further sexualized by adults and children alike for being intersex and the WAY I was intersex that I would not have the same relationship to any of this. As I stated, it's why I feel so strongly about some of it. I don't know who I would be without trauma, I can't just take my trauma aside and yes, I've gone through therapy, multiple attempts, some forced and some me trying to approach it carefully. It's why I tried to study developmental psychology.

I really dislike the statement 'why do you believe that the majority of 14 year olds were sexual'. I believe a majority of 14 year olds weren't and aren't asexual because a majority of the population is not asexual. It's a minority group. So is being gay. So is being trans. So is being intersex. If they feel strongly enough to identify as asexual, it is probably because they have an experience where it has made them feel othered, or at the very least uncomfortable. I don't even see why it matters if they're wrong about it. Nowadays they're constantly seeing people misidentify it as rooted in action, as in if you have sex or not, and some of them are probably very scared of the expectation of sex, and so they may label themselves incorrectly because they want to feel like they have support in language to communicate a perfectly normal boundary to have and when they get older, hopefully they recognize that.

That's part of why I dislike the fixation on if it's about sex or not! Or even the fixation people have on labels staying stagnant! Lots of people identify as straight or cis or whatever before realizing they're not, and it's okay also for them to have gotten it wrong the first or second or fiftieth time around idk. I have friends that still don't exactly know where they sit on both gender and orientation. I think that's normal! We have our whole lives to navigate!

But also 'who told you that'. Almost everyone around me except maybe some of the xtians (I'm not xtian) and mainly the xtians were more focused on telling me that 14 year old girls weren't interested in those kinds of things, which is why they must be 'protected' from 14 year old boys who are entirely too interested in it and my biology would make me unsafe even after I had, against my will, been medically altered due to complications with my hormones and body.

I don't know. I don't know how to explain what I grew up in. I don't know if it's different cultural expectations, I don't know if it's the ways I was seen as a threat by white people, I don't know. It's not 'who' told me that because 'who' was nearly everyone. But even if they weren't telling me that, even if they were telling me I was 'smart' for not dating or that I probably shouldn't date anyway or that no matter who I dated it would be weird, they also thought it was weird I had no actual interest at all. That I didn't admire celebrities or had crushes or expressed any future interest in it. People thought it was weird as hell I thought the entire construct of it was kind of fake, and yes, I was also autistic and so there was a level of them just thinking I was stupid and developmentally challenged because I was autistic, but that's also part of why they tried to 'fix' it, because my presentation was one where I could 'try' to fit.

But also I know lots of people who were raised xtian and expected to be girls who also got really messed up by the confusing explanations and expectations around it. That hurt themselves because they thought there was something gross or wrong with them as they hit perfectly normal developmental milestones. I was also the outlet for a lot of weird guilt and self-loathing from both boys and girls who viewed me as innately sexual for my relationship to gender. That viewed my medical changes as something somehow for them.

I know it's perfectly normal to not date at 14, I don't know how to be more clear about that, I don't know how to say 'yes I am aware plenty of 14 year olds are figuring themselves out, plenty of them don't know or fake crushes or even will explain they don't know if they've had them yet, I know plenty of them are definitely not interested in sex or dating' and also state 'this is why I'm saying it's not about sex! the ways I was othered and hypersexualized and desexualized are about all the tiny other ways I did not fit into the boxes I was supposed to!'

I was trying to express how having 'asexual' as a term helped me cope. Helped me be more compassionate to my peers. Continues to help me now. That's what labels are even for. That's their use. I was upset seeing someone say "#you’re 15!#you don’t want to have sex! that’s fine!#it’s not an identity!" about a niece identifying as asexual on a post discussing how the op's relationship to crushes/attraction has changed from having a lot of them as a teen to mellowing out a lot as an adult (which is normal, which is why I'm so! fucking confused! on the fucking pushback!!!! on me stating that it was othering! to be a child outside of that and attacked by adults and other children over it!!! and now I'm being told 'nothing about ur experience was abnormal' then why!!! was I constantly!!! told!!! it was!!!).

I mean I can tell you part of why. I am not fucking stupid. I am aware I was 'abnormal' also for my body and my brain and my race. Normalcy is socially constructed and upheld. Something can be atypical but not treated as abnormal, and something can be common but socially classified as abnormal for structural purposes. Like we say 'minority' for nonwhite people as if white people aren't actually STATISTICALLY globally the minority. (Yes, I know, that depending on your country, they are statistically a majority, but they only became the 'majority' in the country I'm in through horrific violence and even in countries where they are statistically the majority it's violently upheld as they push back against nonwhite people moving in blah blah blah, ie still socially upheld through structures).

Like I feel like somehow I'm having entirely different conversations about this.

"like, yeah, hypothetically someone who identifies as ace at 14 and experiences sexual attraction at age 18 can change their label from asexual to allosexual. but will they ACTUALLY do that, though? or will they just call themselves a sex-favorable asexual? when you make lacking attraction a part of your identity, what happens to your sense of identity if you DO experience attraction?"

Okay but I don't CARE? The stigma around changing your orientation label needs to go but also I don't care if they're wrong. It's irritating, yes, and often derails these spaces and discussions, but also like it's their life, I can't make them change their identity. I can just share information on how other people have expressed attraction and learning to navigate it and offer solutions and pose questions on how their relationship may have changed and give examples of people coming into it deeper in adulthood.

There are people that think they aren't ace because they don't care if they have sex, even though they aren't attracted to anyone, and eventually reach a point in their life, sometimes late in it, where they learn about it and go 'oh' and suddenly have a word for this thing that helps them better define their experiences. And I don't mean 18, 18 is so young.

What happens to people who identify legitimately as a gender or orientation they later realize doesn't fit them? I can't control them. I had a friend who thought she was straight and it took a lot of self-reflection for her to realize she was bisexual. She had to be out of an environment where her attraction to women was dismissed, desexualized, and recognized as equal and not diminished by her attraction to men.

I've had friends who had been neutral on men in their lives, who realized they were lesbians only in their 20s because they had been neutral about men they tried to date due to expectations. I know women who transitioned and tried to like men out of gender obligation, who had to work through those feelings and the root of them to actually understand their relationship to orientation.

If we allow space and discussion for the myriad of ways it presents or develops or can be defined, then this becomes less of a fixation point. The fragility of people's identities rooted in NEEDING to strictly define them is not helpful for many, especially younger people. I'm still younger people. I know people who've changed their identities in their 50s. I know there are people I don't personally know who have changed and played with their identities even later in life.

I use language the way I use language because I'm autistic and descriptionist. I can't stop people from being prescriptionist with theirs.

I understand the harm people experience when they cling to identities that no longer suit them. But I can't constantly stop people from harming themselves, I can't control them! I ALSO can feel uncomfortable or out of place when people try to relate to me and utilize the same terms I do but in completely different ways. I don't know how to interact when someone my age comes to me identifying as ace but then also being alarmed when I do not relate to the ways they categorize attraction or lack thereof. It can be very strange to do so. A lack of something is even harder to define than the existence of something.

"also i need to point out that there are literal biological functions that are not done developing until you are over 18. your body and brain and hormones are still growing. you definitely cannot say with any certainty that anyone below the age of 16 knows they experience sexual attraction or not"

Okay, and again, they can just change how they define it. People biologically change their whole lives. Menopause biologically changes people but it doesn't mean that for the period of their life before they may utilize labels to describe their experience before that point, or that those identities may still be important to them after that point.

I didn't say they always know or correctly define if they experience attraction or not? I don't think people can really say with any certainty until they have reason to feel certain. I think people can be 16 and not know and 25 and not know and 52 and not know.

As stated before, I'm intersex. I was also medically altered in a way that potentially is part of why I do not experience attraction idk. I know people who were medically altered similarly who do experience attraction. Idk. I would say 'I don't care' if it would have been different otherwise, but I do care actually, I care a lot, but my reality is what it is now and it has been incredibly harmful to me to try and 'treat' it. If something changes, I will change my identity, and not feel ashamed that I utilized language the way I needed to while it was relevant to me.

I'm autistic and intersex. I don't. I don't know how to phrase this but like. I have never been developmentally categorized as in the position of 'normal.' Because normal is socially defined and enforced. There are stages and ranges that are categorized as 'normal.' People who do not fit those stages or ranges are treated differently. Sometimes they utilize language for it. I don't. Like that's all it is to me.

"finally i need you to understand that by emphasizing “hey, it’s actually completely fine and normal to not be interested in sex at all when you’re in high school” it actually helps prevent teens from being sexually abused. “most teens are allosexual” is NOT the message you want to be spreading."

It is in fact true that emphasizing to children that it is their right and completely fine and acceptable and a boundary they can uphold to not be interested in sex in high school, this is good and useful and helpful. Giving them language for that is important, regardless of why they need it.

It is also important to help prevent abuse by giving them better language and resources on how they may be developing sexually and that they do not need to be ashamed of interest or engage in unsafe sexual practices as a way to explore that. I had friends literally manipulated by the idea that there was something shameful in their development that was only suitable for adults to 'manage' for them and it was part of their exploitation. This is in fact an aspect of abstinence-only education being a failure.

Children also need to be taught even if they ARE developing sexual interest, they can also develop boundaries around it anyway! Shame, confusion, hiding, whatever about this literally directly leads a lot of teenagers into the arms of predators. It alarms and concerns me this topic can somehow shift into statements that may further confuse these lines, so I want to be very clear.

And I want to also state I don't. Ugh. I don't think children by and large actually are easily defined as 'majority straight' or 'majority allosexual' or anything like that. I think that obviously the majority of people meet that, hence my earlier statement of noticing a kind of othering, but I don't actually think that means it's fair to label hordes of children as either straight or allosexual or even cis because it is in fact typical that they wouldn't even know or have a definitive enough relationship to it.

Feeling drawn to describing an experience you have with language that is about how you've felt othered doesn't even mean no one else involved could later define themselves with those terms. Some of the people who were cruel to me found out later they were boys or found out later they were girls or found out later they were gay or found out later they were intersex in a different way from me even.

I AGREE that children should be taught they are allowed to have boundaries??? I agree that children should be taught it's acceptable and valid and completely within their right to not have crushes or interest in dating or interest in sex or be more focused on their other experiences (like poverty, like disability, like race, like trauma, like education, like gender, like media interests, like whatever else??) over defining themselves and their gender and their orientation?

I think we should in fact encourage that it is okay to not know or not need to know yet. I think we should encourage people to realize they don't have to rush experiences they aren't ready for. I have friends whose first relationship was 25 and they never identified as ace or aro, they just were never in a position to get into that part of themselves for a variety of reasons. I don't. I do not understand the reaction to what I've said.

I was upset because an individual child individually defined themselves and some adult in their life was alarmed by a fairly simple identity that was not in any way some permanent or damning aspect. I'm upset because in 2020 I saw some adult literally tell a middle-grade child who identified as asexual on the internet they were 'attracting pedophiles' by identifying publicly as ace. An adult thought it was appropriate to define it that way and say that kind of thing to a child because of the child's identity. A whole lot of other adults agreed with it and kept going on about the inherently sexual nature of the term meant to describe an orientation.

It's just weird. When I told my mom in high school, she became fixated on the ways she might have broken me or made me that way. She became focused on listing all the possible other explanations and getting me to counseling and then devolved into belittling me for it, when all it was was an explanation for how I felt I was experiencing the world. It helped my friends be kinder to me. It helped me be kinder to my friends. It still helps me navigate the ways I may be unable to relate to others.

#idk #acephobia #idk I just feel like ppl need this tagged bc it's very upsetting??? #other trigger warnings listed before read more

[dissociativediscourse]

wrt this post

https://at.tumblr.com/dissociativediscourse/something-else-to-add-via-infected-system-ty/ftuep0wn2ovb

Is it okay for a system with a dissociative disorder to want to identify as plural? Where we are in our life/recovery, calling ourselves plural helps us show kindness to our other parts. Treating them like other people is unfortunately the only way we can begin to accept ourself and show ourself some self-compassion.

We’re not putting off recovery by identifying this way, and we do recognize we are parts of a whole. But our trauma has made us multiple, plural, more than one. And accepting that (for us) is what’s allowing us to begin to accept our trauma (after denying it for over a decade!)

Idk it’s all really confusing and I don’t want to be unconsciously harming my system by continuing to use the plural label if that’s going to have negative affects on us down the line.

We really like your account and appreciate what you do here! I hope this sort of ask is okay - we hope you’re doing well and have a great day! :)

You’re talking about this portion of my addition, right? I’m actually glad you’ve asked this, because it allows me to add a little nuance to my reply where there was none. For that, I’m sorry. There’s nothing wrong with considering yourself plural, as long as you’re doing it in a healthy way, and not trying to further dissociate yourself from each other.

I don’t like using the word plural for my own reasons, but I do this in my own way. We are parts of a whole, and if you took one of us and separated us, we’d never be able to function on our own. We need each other, because none of us are one full brain. That’s just the reality of it. But we’re still individuals, and we’re still unique. We all have qualities about us that make us special, and important. This, I think, is a very good way of looking at it! And I think it fits in at least pretty similarly to what you’re saying.

This is also echoed in one of the ways my therapist helps us— DBT methods for interpersonal relationships… But for inner-interpersonal relationships.

There’s nothing wrong with seeing yourself as plural, I’ll say it again— as long as you are not or are not attempting to further dissociate from each other. That’s why I said that the way I did in that post— gateway drug. A lot of people who had JUST discovered their systems jump straight down the plural rabbit hole and start trying to further differentiate themselves and identify everyone and be separate, and it hurts them. For someone who’s reached a certain point in their journey, it may not! But, sadly, this is not the case for many people in the online community.

I’m a little tired right now so sorry if I’m wording things weirdly, haha. If you have any more questions about this or need me to clarify, feel free to send another ask or DM me! I’m really happy you like this account, and I want you to know this is always okay! I’m happy to help. Thank you for sending this! I hope you have a wonderful day as well, anon :)

#asks #dissociative identity disorder #other specified dissociative disorder #dissociative identity disorder advice #osdd #did advice #complex dissociative disorder #osddid #did support #osdd support #advice asks #plurality