#idk why i keep posting at 11pm. hi

[energons]

howlback my friend howlback

#transformers #maccadam #howlback #my art #fanart #idk why i keep posting at 11pm. hi

[lilwetto]

Save a horse, ride a cowboy (18+)

Scrim x Y/N

Warnings: SMUT. Also will be written in third person BUT it might change to first since it's easier for me idk yet. might change it.

A/N this is my first scrim smut, so GO EASY ON ME. I also cannot do small paragraphs. I'M SORRY. I'm learning okay lmao, this is new to me all over again- this will not be light work, ok? Also would appreciate requests n shit, I want to actually test how far I can go with these while writing my stories on wattpad. I'll update whenever I can here, there's no hate here, only love. All my smut that I post here will be on my wattpad under LTE since I want to make an imagines book based on requests. It's difficult writing stories and trying to come up with ideas for imagines so pls give me ideas.

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It's been a month since you've heard from Scott, the two of you had been fighting on and off for the last three years, being in a relationship with him had never been an easy one. You had been best friends from the start to failed lovers now, he had written a verse about you in their song Escape from Babylon- talking about how you had gone from saying "I hate you" to "I love you", you've been in love with Scott since before the fame, however he had never felt the same way about you until a few years ago. 

Your last falling out, you decided to pack all of your shit and move out of the home you two shared. He was entertaining the females on tour and that seemed to be the last of your strength to stay in that relationship, leaving hurt the most since you felt like he never fought for you. 

Unfortunately, you’d have to see him again, you were their stylist for onstage attire and helping with the style of any music video any of them would be in. You knew Scott had a music video coming up, he had been writing a new album for the last year and a half. some new genres for him to try. Autotune being his best friend of course. 

You were dreading that phone call from their manager, Kyle. He knew your relationship with Scott was in fact all over the place, everyone could see that the two of you would always fall out, it was no secret that you were slowly starting to hate the person he had become. 

The last few minutes were peaceful yet horrible as you were pulled from your thoughts by the harsh ringtone of your iPhone. You groan out loud as Kyle’s name flashed across the screen, knowing you couldn’t ignore it. He paid you to do your job. 

“What?” You mumbled after accepting the call. 

“Nice to hear you’re cheery, Y/N.” His chuckle rattled your brain, rolling your eyes in disgust. “We need you to style this next video, come out to Chihuahuan Desert.” The fucking desert? Great. You think to yourself.

“When?” You mumble. You already knew the answer to your question, now. 

“Now would be great.” You look at the time. 

“Why the fuck are you guys picking closer to 11pm?” You didn’t want to leave the comforts of your bed. You managed to find a small apartment in New Mexico since your house with Scott was located in the middle of New Mexico. 

“Y/N, we’re not doing this again, be here in the next hour.” Kyle hung up on you, making you more annoyed than ever as you climbed out of bed and threw on some clothes that’ll keep you warm for the night. 

You drive your car to Chihuahuan Desert, seeing parts of the crew already setting up the lighting for this music video. Scott hadn’t released any new music yet, he had so much in the vault and was too picky to choose what he wanted to do with them all. 

You weren’t happy that they wanted to do this music video at stupid o’clock, parking your car and climbing out. You walk towards the group of people, seeing Kyle getting hands on. “Where is he?” You ask. Clearly not wanting to see or talk to Scott. 

“He’s in that trailer.” He pointed towards the trailer park looking as home. You rolled your eyes and walked up to the doors, knocking loudly as you hear a grumble and the words “come in.” 

Scott was looking over a few pieces of clothing, keeping his eyes locked onto the table as you stepped into the trailer. A part of you wanted to hug him tightly, but the other part wanted to cuss him out and cry. You were the only two in the trailer, looking over at the thousands of clothing that he couldn’t pick from. 

You grab a white oversized shirt, orange sweatshirt and a pair of his baggy jeans, placing them to the side as you looked over at his accessories. “What were you thinking of wearing?” You break the silence first. 

“Was thinking maybe this chain and bracelet.” Your hand brushes against his as the two of you go to pick up the same item. “Sorry.” You mumble quickly. 

Scott shrugs it off and plays it cool as he picks up the white cowboy hat and places it onto his head, a different look for him. He was branching out, picking up new styles from what he does in Suicideboys. 

“I want to say I’m sorry.” He started, catching you by surprise. Scott never apologized; he was stubborn as fuck when it came to him being wrong. In Scott’s eyes he was always right, who was the female in your relationship, huh?

“Doesn’t matter, I’m over it.” You say before you can even stop your words from rolling off the tip of your tongue. Scott wouldn’t like that answer and it felt foreign coming from you as you turned your back to leave the trailer to let him get dressed. 

“What?” His hand enclosed around your right upper arm, making you mentally groan. This is the last thing you wanted to deal with right now. “You don’t give a fuck about us?” 

You let out the biggest laugh as you turn your head to look at him. “That’s rich coming from you. Scott, it’s you who doesn’t give a fuck about us. I have chased you and pleaded and what would you do?” You huffed in annoyance as he turned you to face him. 

“You know I ain’t mean it like that, shawty.” He was doing his little cheesy grin, the one that would get him what he wanted as he bit on his lip. 

“Get changed, you asshole.” You wanted to leave because this always happened, it was always a cycle with Scott, and you were too tired to keep going around like a merry-go-round. 

He pulled your hands towards his belt, lingering your fingers over the cold metal piece. “I think I need some help.” He mumbled that grin still sitting on his lips made you want to slap it off. 

You thought about leaving, but somehow you were in a trance, helping him out of his clothes to change into these new ones. He reached around you, locking the door from behind you before he pressed you up against it. 

His arm outstretched beside your head, resting his hand on the door. “Suck it.” He mumbled, his other hand now holding your chin as his thumb grazed against your lower lip. 

Being the good girl that you were, you slowly got to your knees and with the help of Scott had his pants around his thighs. He was semi-hard, almost waving at you. Your eyes doe-like, stared up at him as you slowly stuck your tongue out. 

You tapped the head of his length against your tongue, you were going to tease him. Scott didn’t deserve to get it how he wanted it, you slowly run the tip of your tongue from the head to the base then back again before spitting at the end. 

He was trying not to moan, watching your every move like a predator stalking its prey. His thumb caressed your cheek as you eased him between your lips, gently nipping your teeth against his sensitive skin. This earned you a small groan from him, this was new, you hardly ever took the upper hand when it came to sex. 

“Y/N, stop teasing.” He grumbled, getting flustered by the lack of contact that he wanted. You peered up to his eyes, seeing the sparkle glistening in his eyes from the lights outside. 

Scott didn’t care much for people hearing and sometimes he didn’t care if anyone saw the two of you fuck, you were his girl and only his. He grabbed your hair in an attempt to get you to do what he asked. The game you were playing with him? Dangerous as hell. 

You pulled your head away, gazing up at him like a deer in the headlights. The look he always loved seeing on you. “Stop fucking playin, Y/N…” He was becoming agitated. 

“Who said I was playing, Scotty?” A small smirk finally appeared on your lips as his hand moved from your face to your hair in seconds, forcing you to be face-to-face with his now hardened length. 

He was throbbing, you could see it with the way it moved like it had a pulse. Your tongue touched the tip, jumping in excitement over a little bit of contact. Your lips finally making the contact that he so longed for, wrapping around his length caused Scott to groan under his breath. 

“Fuck..” Those words weren’t meant to be heard especially by you. He didn’t want you knowing that he had been missing you, his stubbornness stopped him from calling and texting you, refusing to sleep with any girl that threw themselves at him. 

He gripped your hair and slowly began to thrust his hips as he forced you to bob your head against them, taking the upper hand like he always done. You gagged slightly, feeling him hit the back of your throat. It had been awhile, moaning against him before he pulled himself out. 

He forced you up, pinning your back against the door as he roughly pulled your pants and panties off, standing on them to keep them in place so you could take them off without falling over. Scott grabbed your hand as he fell back against the couch, pulling you on top of his lap as he then eased himself inside of you. 

A low groan fell from his lips as he held your hips tightly, allowing you to move when you wanted to. The feeling of him stretching you out caused a soft whimper to burst from your throat, you had missed this feeling of him inside of you. 

You began to slowly rock your hips back and forth, each time you’d build more confidence in each roll forward. Your hands rested on his shoulders as you began to spell ‘coconut’ with your hips. 

“Holy shit… Y/N, you been watching videos or some shit?” His eyes peered from under the hat, licking his lips as he thought about devouring you right there and then.

You laugh under your breath which turned into a moan as Scott began to thrust up inside of you. His hands holding your hips firmly still as his hip movements became faster. His groans were filling the empty spaces as you began to rub circular motions against your clit, you refused to let him be the only one to cum. 

“Fuck… I can’t hold it anymore.” He mumbled, you took the hat from off his head and placed it onto your own. 

Your hips began to move faster against his own movements. Your moans becoming louder as he quickly covered your mouth, grunting as he filled you with his thick, warm load. You whimper under your breath as you feel yourself tighten around him, releasing yourself all over him.  

“Shit…” He chuckled quietly under his breath before placing a couple of soft kisses to your lips. “That was good.” 

You hum in response and slowly slide him out. “What can I say? I missed it.” You placed the hat back on his head and pulled your panties n pants back on before heading outside again. 

Everyone was staring over as you exited the trailer. “What?” You mumbled as Kyle came over. 

“The entire team heard the two of you..” He laughed, acting as if he was embarrassed for us. 

“What can I say? I like to save the horses and ride me a cowboy instead.” 

#$crim #scrim #g59 #wetto #$uicideboy$ #suicideboysfanfic #suicideboysmut #smut #ftp #slick sloth #$uicide christ

[duckling-king]

Okay so haha @lillithhearts convinced me to write my oc x canon with Vox. I literally started writing this at 11pm last night while we were talking, I'm cringe but I'm FREE. Also shout out to Lillith, I've only had him for one day but if anything happened to him I'd kill everyone on tumblr and then myself /ref

Relationship: OC x Vox, toxic enemies to less toxic lovers except their firmly in their toxic era

Tw: talk of/manipulation of power imbalance, themes of ownership and control, horror elements (idk how well I got that across but that was the intention sjdhhs), pushing/breaking of boundaries, overall just a toxic relationship

Update like three hours after posting: Now officially beta read by me :) JEFHSHHD

Lemme know if I should tag any other tw :]!! I'm always open to constructive criticism (or compliments haha what who said that)

~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~

Hell was as lively as ever, especially in the dingy alley Vox found himself An old theatre stood tall in front of him, dilapidated and crumbling, and barely stable enough to be inhabitable

It was dark. As usual. He couldn't remember ever walking in and finding the building lit up from the inside.

To any other sinner the place would've been unsettling, frightening even. But not to him. He was used to the creaking floorboards, the crumbling walls, the threat of a total collapse of the building. Certainly used to it. Not intimidated whatsoever by the shadowy darkness that stretched in front of him.

A cold, firm hand on his shoulder suddenly shocked him from his thoughts, and he suddenly found himself face to screen with a life size wooden puppet. The face was carved to look like a citizen of cannibal town; a vintage three piece suit made up its torso, with a similarly carved tophat permanently stuck to it's head. The eyes had been hollowed out and filled with what had to be marbles, as if to mimic the eyelessness of the cannibals from Rosie's district.

He stepped back, suppressing a flinch as the puppet tilted its hyperrealistic head, and gestured out with a flourish down the dark hall. It moved like it was held up on strings, and it's makeshift eyes met his own with a strange intensity. Almost as if the marbles were truly staring at- no into him.

That fucker was watching him.

Something about that kicked him into overdrive. He pushed past the puppet with a static charge, heeding it no mind as he used his screen as a flashlight in the dark, navigating his way through the hall, past the rows of display cases, until he found himself stood in front of a very familiar door.

Every time he turned this doorknob he was filled with a sense of sick nostalgia, and every time he saw that fucker's face it was replaced by pure rage.

"Voxxy.. what brings you here?" Virden grinned, resting his chin in the palm of his hand as he tapped his talons on the rotting wood of the desk.

Vox felt sparks run up his arms as he squeezed his hands into fists. This asshole knew just how to get under his skin, and the smug look on Virden's face said he was very aware.

"Don't call me that." Vox snapped, glaring right at him and only getting a condescending pout in return.

"Of course, I'm so sorry.." Virden mocked, as Vox felt aggravated sparks claw their way into his circuits, "Would you prefer.. puppet?" He asked, tilting his head with a grin that made Vox's blood boil.

Electricity crackled through Vox's veins, popping and snapping and biting at his muscles from the inside out, "You know I wouldn't." He growled through his teeth, unable to hide his clear aggravation. He knew better than to rush into an argument with Virden. The display case to his left made that very clear. But fuck was it hard to keep the anger, the static, at bay.

"Fine. You clearly aren't here to have any fun." Virden huffed, going back to tapping his talons along the wood out of boredom. "Why did you request a meeting Vox? Did you miss me~?" He purred, batting his eyelashes at Vox and relishing the way his eye twitched.

"No." He immediately struck down Virden's attempt to tease, feeling as though he was already at the end of his rope, "I need.. a favor from you-"

"Oh? Did you piss off Alastor again, baby?" He purred, raising an eyebrow at him.

Vox twitched. The casual way he asked... the assumption of Vox's lack of power.. the sheer disrespect-

"THIS ISN'T ABOUT ALASTOR!" Vox yelled, voice stuttering and echoing as the electricity in his veins finally escaped, flying out in all directions. "God fucking forbid I show up and ask for one simple favor! I can't be in your goddamn office without hearing bullshit out of your fucking mouth-!"

Vox continued to yell, getting louder and louder and more and more upset the more things he found to say. His entire body felt like a live wire, sparkling and cracking and popping and unable to stop the current running through him. He was on a roll, telling Virden what for, that wouldn't stop any time soon.

As this continued, Virden's smile dropped, replaced by a neutral observation. And after a couple moments of allowing Vox to yell at him, he finally stood up and walked right over to the display case, taking his time to look over each puppet before gingerly picking up one of them and returning to his seat with it. He eyed his own craftsmanship silently, letting Vox tire himself out.

"I mean honestly! I'm Vox! CEO of VoxTech and member of the fucking VEES! People would pay a shit ton of money just to be seen in public with me! I'm not gonna stand here and let you-!" Then, he stopped.

The puppet, laid in the talons of Virden's hand. His puppet. The carved TV head hanging limply off the side of his hand, strings tied tight to every appendage. It looked so limp, as though it had given in willingly to the embrace from Virden's hand, holding it up to be seen.

Then, with his other hand, Virden picked up the puppet by the strings, puppeting it properly. Vox watched silently as Virden absently played with his puppet, making it walk and move however Virden wanted. It looked trapped, distraught, subdued.

"Sorry Voxxy, were you saying something?" Virden smiled innocently, glancing down at the puppet in his hands and making it wave up at it's living counterpart. "I got a little distracted."

"I.." Damnit. Damnit. Virden and his deal and his puppets and- fuck he hated the way that he stiffened up, hated the way his heart sank into his stomach with dread, hated how he could look at that little puppet on the table and see himself so clearly, caught in the clutches of this sadistic asshole all because of a mistake he made decades ago...

"Vox? Are you okay baby?" Virden asked, tilting his head and letting a sinister grin form on his face. He knew exactly what he was doing, and Vox hated every excruciating second of it.

"I'm f-fine." Vox forced out, feeling electricity crackle in the back of his neck and into his screen. He watched as Virden took in the reaction, only getting more delighted by how clearly on edge Vox was.

"Good. Now sit." He gestured to the chair opposite him at the desk, a predatory grin on his face as he watched Vox slowly move towards it.

"Good boy." Virden only grinned wider, as Vox scowled right back. "Now, mister CEO," He taunted, leaning back in his chair and putting his feet up on the desk, wings spreading out behind him. "What favor did you want?"

He could almost feel the strings on his limbs as he took slow measured steps towards the chair. He hated this. God- why did Virden have to be so- then down he went, sitting down in the chair like he had been told. Like a-

And thus their back and forth continued. With Vox yet again being held under Virden's thumb like a bug, being used as a plaything to entertain him. It was a game, cat and mouse, and Vox was loathe to admit that he found himself playing the mouse.

"Alright, so I come to the Vees' little party next week and play bodyguard. Simple as that." Virden hummed, lounging easily in his seat and examining his talons as Vox glared at him.

"Yes. Simple and easy. You show up and take out any competition while keeping our reputation in mind." He spoke through gritted teeth, eye twitching and glitching on his screen as he watched Virden pay him almost no mind.

It was infuriating, watching him lounge about while Vox was kept on the edge of his seat, waiting for the bird to strike for the worm.

"I can handle that.. I've been meaning to collect a few more trinkets..." he smirked, the sight of it sending an electric chill down Vox's spine.

"Good. We're agreed then?"

"We are."

And with that Virden stood, holding out a hand for Vox to shake. "Wonderful, I look forward to working with you again." He spoke, making sure to sound pompous and professional, simply to annoy him even further.

Vox sighed and stood slowly, reaching out a hand that was certainly not shaking as he grasped Virden's hand. A bright light emanated from their handshake as Vox felt the puppet strings materialize on his wrist, wrapping themselves up his forearm as the shackle around his neck weighed him down.

Virden only hummed as the bright blue electricity crawled quickly up his forearm in return, acting as if he didn't feel the sharp pricks of sparks and heat. He acted like he was untouchable, comepletely indestructible. It was infuriating.

"Well, it's been fun, puppet." Vox's eye twitched yet again, the moment proving futile. "But unfortunately, I have a show to write!" Virden smiled, and if he didn't know better, Vox would almost call it sincere.

When they let go, the strings and the shackle faded, granting Vox a moment to take a deep, steadying breath.

"So be a good puppet, and get out." Immediately, the smile was gone, replaced by a glare that made Vox's nerves spark. As much as he wanted to jump over the table and strangle this fucking bird, grab his neck and force him to look into his eyes so he could control him for once. But all he could do was glare as he did what he was told.

Like a good puppet.

#oc x canon #vox x oc #my ocs #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #the vees #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel fanfic #yes im main tagging this shut up i want attention #Puppet Master #<- OC TAG CUZ IM GONNA BE TALKING ABT HIM MORE I KNOW IT #and what if i said i was nervous to post this?? what if i said ive been staring at the post button trying to hype myself up?? hm???

[drunktayloratthevmas]

Fame aau rosekiller exes (unrequited love) happy relationship

Its 11pm and i was going to sleep But this idea came to mind and idk why I feel the need to share so yeah

Barty is a famous singer (think the neighbourdhood But also frank ocean and ldr) and evan is a famous model and a actor (think suki waterhouse a little bit) and they meet one day at an after party of a runway show of evan (barty was there because regulus was also modelling and he is a good friend) and they feel in love that second on that night and they keep talking and flirting and seeing each other for a while

Barty and evan dated for 2 and a half years and they were THE couple and everyone loved them, barty would make or Talk things Related to evan on his concerts and even has a song for him and how they meet and Everything on one of his albums (think margaret by lana del rey mixed with envy the leaves by madison beer) and evan would make lives and lit talk about barty for like 3 hours straight and people would think its the cutest ever

Idk But I think they break up But not because evan got bored or didnt feel loved or they had problems or fights, no, he just break yo with barty cause yeah and move on cause he has the mindseat of "if I did this I dont know why would I Regret it, I Wouldnt have done it if so" so he did that and pack his things But left barty a scrapbool with All of their photos since they meet and a camera wich barty gifted to him For his birthday

Barty never got with evan did it even tho evaned to him why, he was heartbroken and cried for a whole month on regulus' guest room cause his shared room with evan on their apartment had too many memories, he wrote songs for evan after the break up But most of them he never realesed them, he didnt realized when he was begging evan not to Leave him he would Never get over evan

Their fans and everyone was heartbroken too even tho they didnt know the reason of the break up, evan after 5 months of the break up he meet Amos and really liked him so they went on dates and try to date and actually did make each other very happy, people were horrible to the, evan because of how he could be with someone else in such a little time (bitch get over it... You Are Annoying shut up) and to Amos just because everyone loved barty and evan together so the New partner always gets shit on the for no reason other than "your partner looked better with this person" and i think barty would had collab of had been friends with Amos and like had post higlights or put music out with him and when the relationship went public he deleted those for a few days then put ir back on like nothing happened (he was having a mental break down my bbg was NOT okay) and well of people ate that whole ass drama UPPP like I would have too

And i think Amos and evan would still be dating and people Are a lot more suportive of them and liked them a lot more than before and barty would go to a random podcast channel to promote his music and that But they asked a question of "after your break yo with evan you haven't been with anyone else even tho he didnt even need 5 months to do so, why is that?" and yeah ve got annoyed a little at that But he told the truth "im super happy for Amos and evan actually I think they make a great couple and they looks like the love each other and will take care of each other, I will never forget what I say to evan that night things ended, I said it that night, I will say it now and i will say it again “evan rosier I loved you for many years, I love you now and i dont think I will ever not love you... just so you know” and yes i loved evan then, now and i will always love him"

So yyeah girl now its 12:18 / 00:18 and i should go to sleep But I will not I know myself saddly

#Rosekiller #rosekiller brainrot #fic ideas #Evan rosier #evan x barty #barty crouch jr #rosekiller fic #barty x evan #slytherin skittles #regulus black #evan rosier x barty crouch jr #barty crouch junior #Fame au #Ideas a t 12 pm #Amos and evan #I created that ship and now i loved it #This could be the same But instead of Amos is James and But James is regulus' ex so now Reg and barty cry over this #Not bartylus #I hate that ship im sorry if you like it #Blessed u <3 #Or with rodolphus and he could be like barty's best friend who always had a crush on evan and it would be so dramatic im here for it

[theglitchywriterboi]

vent post- [Under read more cause it's a lot. TL;DR, I fucking hate my oldest brother so much & for a lot of reasons other than whats in this post]

So my older brother, who we'll just call N, asked my little brother & I to take out the garbage [bathroom & kitchen] and recycle today, but he didn't have any time he wanted it done, just by today cause the garbage & recycle comes tomorrow [or Friday depending on when you see this]. So my little brother had started on the recycle & asked when I wanted to do the bathroom garbage [it normally overflows so its a two person job] And... Well its easier if I break it down like this:

Little Brother: "So do you wanna do the bathroom garbage at 10:30"

Oldest Brother [We'll call him S]: "No you're not doing it then" [Keep in mind he was already hostile in tone***]

Little brother: "... Why???"

S: "Because I go to sleep at 11PM, you're doing it now" [two things to note: He's almost NEVER in bed at 11 or even preparing at 11. Most nights he's still playing video games at 12 to 1AM. And also he's still being rude/hostile, he's not at all being calm or nice about any of this. For him talking just imagine his tone is rude/hostile]

Little brother: "How does us doing it at 10:30 interfere with that..."

S: "BECAUSE !! You guys are gonna take a while to get it done !! And why wait ?!"

Little brother: "Because I don't want to do it now. And it literally doesn't take long"

[This goes on a little longer, S tells us [not once did he ASK we do it sooner, he repeatedly told us we're doing it now] He also said we're doing the recycle now, to which Little brother said "Thats what I'm trying to do now jackass" & S didn't reply]

Me, to little brother: "Just get me when you wanna do it" *Walks to my room cause I'm holding shit & I don't wanna argue w/ him*

S: *More about how we're doing it now*

Me: *Doesn't reply cause of already stated reasons*

S: "Really [my name] you're gonna be like that???"

Me: "I'm putting stuff away oh my god..." [Yeah not super nice to walk away/not reply while hes talking, but he was being really rude][ALSO I SHOULD SAY he has this tent in the living room - it's like a big curtain that all his stuff is in & that he was in, so he wasn't seeing us he was just yelling at us]

S: *Tbh I wasn't really listening because he was still being rude, but basically being mad I didn't reply*

So I took a beat to not have to deal w/ him, like less than five minutes. I typed on my phone basically saying "Lets just do it now so he stops being an asshole" & showed it to little brother. Do you know how long it took us to do it ?

FUCKING SIX MINUTES [and thats w/ a buffer, we set a timer & it had only passed 5 minutes when we finished]. So when we came out we were being a bit cocky about it if I'm being honest. [But note that while we knew he could hear, we weren't talking TO him or purposely being loud about it, we were talking in normal speaking voices]

Little brother: "Wow that too sooooooo long !!!"

Me: "I know right ?!?! Its almost midnight !!"

S *Yelling*: "I SAID I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IDK WHY YOU GUYS ARE BEING ASSES ABOUT IT, GODFORBID YOU'RE ASKED TO DO ANYTHING"

[Which like... We were literally ALREADY doing it when he started demanding we do it now.... And the only reason we get upset when he "asks" us to do stuff, is because he almost never asks, he normally demands & is an asshole about it..]

Idk, maybe this makes it look like little brother & I are just as bad as he is - which maybe. But he's always so rude about everything. Also if he had just been a normal human about it & went "Hey, I'm going to bed at 11, do you mind doing it sooner ?" *We say it doesn't take long at all* "Oh, I'm sure it doesn't but just to be safe I'd prefer if it was done sooner, especially since I might turn in sooner" We would've done it then w/ no issue, the problem was he was being a fucking asshole about it. Also maybe its worth mentioning MOST of the garbage in the bathroom is his used tissues. Like I'm not even exaggerating.

[sp-ud]

tftsmp liveblog by someone whos very critical/negative about tftsmp which is why its under a “keep reading”

i know part of the point of tftsmp is the constant improving, but im so sick of hearing him say “this is the best/biggest one yet” every week. like yes karl, thats the point of improving.

“i know you guys look forward to the future tftsmps” actually i hate them more than the past ones.

“this takes a little bit in the future” says cc!karl, c!connor “schlatts been dead for a few months” hasnt schlatt already been dead for a couple of months? shouldnt it be longer if this is a “bit in the future”???

Damn this is really railroady and cringe. At least schlatt is explicit with the fact he is railroading

Also schlatt not having proper permissions. Embarrassing.

im worried about how this might go south and angsty, but also who knows. its going too easy. also damn its so linear. at least they are acknowledging it.

while this map is cool and interactive, i once again dont like the favortism tftsmp seems to get? like almost every other lore doesnt get non-mc-survival elements. the only other non-mc-surv stuff is the egg hurting back, and ranboos silk touch hands, which is a lot less than a whole modded server

aw fuck post limit hell. 11pm cst where are you.

The 4th wall breaks finally don't feel awkward, maybe because they're finally all doing them and it's not a serious tftsmp

is karl saying “their moms” is probably forgetting theyre twins, but im taking it to mean wlw moms

wait... why did that one bit look like the egg when i glanced back up? should i be worried...?

so wait, is schlatt genuinely drunk? idk how to feel about that if he actually is

dont touch the egg lore please. especially because bbh was a last minute addition and idk if that means he had any input on it or not

so this is what glatt has canonically been up too? also why is his tomb here... if his grave is in the dsmp?

TECHNOBLADE SAYS THE WORD BONG???

that. thats the ending? really? that? for real?

NO NARRATION STILL? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? THE ONE THING PEOPLE WERE ASKING FOR WHEN IT COMES TO THE INBETWEEN

wait why does karl have no brim in this video.

exhausted sigh. the inbetween, you’re so well built but i fucking hate how you look

where was the close lore ties. where. we got glatt and connor lore, which is cool but. what?

at least this song is a bop.

“so much time” yeah into the map. and thats it. where the fuck was the story. where. 

#spud liveblogs #tftsmp critical #tftsmp negative #critical #negative

[walkerrenee]

‼️‼️‼️

Aristotle and Dante Dive into the Waters of the World SPOILERS under the cut:

hello, this is just a random post to document my reactions as i read the Ari and Dante sequel, it's not going to be interesting just me screaming mostly but i might spoil something so beware.

start time: 1:55pm (pacific time) 10/13/21

1:56 pm - i've read the first page and am already crying, this is going fantastic

1:57pm - "i'm already home. i'm with you"

no🤍

1:59 pm - "i love the rain more than anything." "i know. i want to be the rain." "you are the rain, Dante."

CRYING SCREAMING THROWING UP

2:29pm - i have a feeling i'm going to be crying everytime a character is crying

2:34pm - hahahhahaha not religion i haven't worked through my religious trauma yet help

3:02pm - sometimes i relate so much to Ari it feels like someone crawled into my brain to extract my deepest thoughts

4:02pm - they way they have to pretend to kiss makes me want to fling myself off a cliff (:

4:14pm - A POEM SHUT UP

5:40 pm - I WANT TO KEEP READING BUT IM FALLING ASLEEP

6:07pm - UPDATE i've obtained caffeine and ordered Dominoes we're back in business I WILL FINISH THIS BOOK ASAP

6:21 pm - someone be my very own dante quintana please im emo

6:39pm - they just met emma and i'm bawling so of course my dominoes driver pulls up at this exact moment

8:11pm - ok i'm really slacking on reading, i keep crying and i feel like something not very great is gonna happen and i'm scared i'm not mentally stable enough for all this

8:18pm - idk if dante calling ari "aristotle quintana" was just a typo or not but i loved it lmao (also if it is a typo it's the 2nd one i've noticed smh they should have hired me to proofread)

8:21pm - "i used to think that she wanted me to be someone else. but it wasn't her who wanted me to be someone else—it was me"

OKAY NO NEED TO CALL ME OUT WTF

8:25pm - NO I DONT LIKE HOW THEYRE TALKING ABOUT ARI'S DAD AND FUNERALS NOPE THIS BETTER NOT BE SOME SICK TWISTED FORESHADOWING I SWEAR TO GOD

8:43pm - "if we're lucky. if we're very lucky, the universe will send us the people we need to survive"

riGHT i had to take a break to sob my eyes out at this part <3

9:57pm - i have only just officially made it halfway through the book, too much crying not enough reading

10:49pm - ok i took a break to paint my nails but i'm officially back on my bullshit pt.2 let's go

10:55pm - "to imagine a future for ari and dante was a fantasy. i did't want to live my life in a fantasy. the world i wanted to live in didn't exist. and i was struggling to love the world i did live in. i wondered if i was strong enough or good enough to love a world that hates me."

IM 3 PAGES INTO THE SECOND HALF AND ONCE AGAIN SOBBING

11:11pm - "but, for me, to love was one thing. to let yourself be loved, well, that was the most difficult thing of all."

HAHAskfsjutdbgsardzrizurzufxbigstk

11:58 pm - "i wondered why people felt they could speak for god."

i have no words tbh

12:07am - he's really going to kill Jaime off isn't he? I CANT STAND THIS FUCK OFF HASNT THIS FAMILY BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH I DONT CARE IF THIS IS HOW REAL LIFE IS IT SUCKS AND IM GOING TO CRY AND I HATE CRYING

12:18am - i mean i already knew bernardo was a piece of shit but god (also i'm glad the topic of the victim being transgender was handled better in this book, by ari mostly obviously. i hated how it was addressed and brushed aside in the first book.)

12:31am - alright i have work in the morning so i should probably sleep, i ended on dante saying the new year was going to be their best one ever so obviously in book language that means shit's about to hit the fan so i'll let future me suffer with that tomorrow (:

DAY 2

12:25pm - i am currently at work waiting for laundry to dry so i am ready for round 2

12:29pm - NO WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK YOU CANT JUST START THE CHAPTER ABOUT HOW HAPPY ARI IS AND HOW HIS MOM AND DAD LOVE NEW YEARS AND THEN FUCKING KILL HIS DAD IN THE SAME CHAPTER FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF

12:43pm - i hate it here i hate everything i haven't cried this hard in years whyyyyyyyg

2:30pm - WAIT A SECOND did he change ari's sisters names in the sequel? i literally just realized, i'm pretty sure he did, i dont have the first book by me atm but i'm almost positive. who tf let this get published like that im screaming

4:35pm - FUCK YOU DANTE I'LL KICK YOUR ASS I SWEAR TO GOD

4:43 pm- "he's not just some boy, mom. he's dante quintana."

SOMEONE CALL THE POLICE I'VE BEEN WOUNDED

5:02 pm - "i was going to ask you to marry me. but they won't let us do that. so i thought maybe it was best just to skip the wedding and get straight to the honeymoon." "have you decided where you'd take me?" "yes, i thought i'd take you to paris. we'll spend our time writing our names on the map of the city of love."

that's it. IVE FINISHED IT. and i'm crying and i loved it and i hated it and ari and dante grow old together in love and no one will convince me otherwise or take that away from me thank you very much. now i will live in a purgatory of numbness for the next week while i try and process this

[sunsetfanfics]

All I Want

(Jadon Sancho x Reader)

Jadon imagine where he really likes you but knows you won’t be with him because of his fboy lifestyle and you always joke about it and he tried to get you or something along those lines please if you can x

Warning: a bit of harsh language

You drag yourself into the break room, feet aching. Tom, your coworker, watched in amusement as you plopped down into the chair across from him, a sigh escaping your lips.

"Tired?"

You look up to see him smile, which you can't help but reciprocate.

"A bit, yeah."

"Only an hour left now, then you get to go home." He replies, to which you nod.

"Yeah, only an hour. You say that as if it'll magically make me feel better."

He shrugs. "It should. You've already worked for seven hours. Plus you have off tomorrow."

"I guess, can you get me a water?"

He chuckles and nods, getting up and walking over to the mini fridge in the corner.

"So, do you have any news on you-know-who?" He asks, receiving a groan in response.

"I think he knows, to be honest. It's not like I'm blowing him off or anything, but his lifestyle just,, isn't for me."

Tom nods, walking back over to hand you an ice cold bottle.

"Thank you." You mutter, receiving a nod in response.

"Well, do you like him?" He questions, sitting back down.

You twist off the cap and don't hesitate to take a swig of cold water.

Once you feel somewhat replenished, you put the bottle on the ground and twist the cap back on.

"To be honest,,," you pause, "I do. I really really do. I just,, I wish he wasn't such a fuckboy. Because underneath that layer is a really kind individual.

"I would date him if he didn't play this,, character. I just-"

But you didn't get the chance to finish as the bell rang outside.

You threw your head back, "fuck my life!"

Tom giggled as he watched you stand up and hurry back out to the desk.

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

As the last hour wound down, there wasn't much to do, but you still managed to keep yourself busy.

Once your shift finished, you went back into the break room, saying goodbye to the few coworkers that were in there on your way out.

Nobody knew about this whole 'situation' with Jadon except for a few people, each of whom you trusted with every fibre of your being. You trusted them to keep this within the group, knowing that if it got out your name along with 'Jadon Sancho's girlfriend' would be everywhere.

As you walked out to your car, you got a text from Tom.

'Did you see his new post on ig?'

You instinctively rolled your eyes. What new flex would it be this time?

'I'll look at it when I get home' you replied as you dug your keys out of your pocket and unlocked your door.

On the whole ride home, you couldn't help but think about him. Even if you tried to think of something else, your mind would somehow twist whatever you were thinking about to always go back to him.

Pulling into the driveway, you had finally managed to stop thinking about him, since you were now thinking about what to eat for breakfast, seeing as it was only 7:18am.

You turned the car off and opened the door, practically hauling yourself out of the driver's seat.

Today was the most difficult 8-hour shift you've done to date, which meant you were beyond worn out.

Your sore feet somehow carried you into the house where, no surprise, your best friend was nowhere to be found.

You both typically worked opposite shifts, so you rarely saw each other, but sometimes you could catch each other just as one was returning home and the other was leaving.

Though it defeated the whole purpose of owning a house together, it was kinda nice to have the space all to yourself after a tough shift.

As you sat down, rather forcefully, on the couch, you flipped your shoes off and grabbed the tv remote sitting on the coffee table. You fully stretched out as you turned the tv on.

This was the routine you had grown accustomed to: you got home, let yourself relax for a bit, then got to work doing something else for a while, then went to bed.

As you pressed the button to turn on Netflix for perfect background noise, your phone went off.

You ignored it, deciding to wait till you had the show set up to check it.

DING! DING! DING!

Notification after notification piled up until you couldn't take it anymore.

You angrily dug your phone out of your pocket and looked at it, the screen lit up with even more texts from your coworker group chat.

You roll your eyes and groan, shifting your attention back to getting The Great British Baking Show on.

Once it started playing, you finally read through the texts.

'Y/N!'

'HAS ANYTHING HAPPENED WITH JADON'

'PLS TELL US'

'omg look at his latest post'

'DAMNNN'

'yall did y/n look @ the post'

'idk but 👀👀'

'he looks like a fboy to me tbh lmaooo sorry Y/N'

You couldn't help but laugh at the last one.

Switching to instagram, you check to see what all the fuss is about.

The post in question? No surprise, a few photos of him shirtless on his friend's expensive yacht.

You roll your eyes, "my god Jadon."

Despite posting classic fuckboy photos on instagram, you couldn't help but get a few butterflies in your stomach.

You double tap on the photo, then go back to the groupchat, only for a new text to pop up.

Jadon ⚽🔥 hey 😛

Another eye roll.

'hey Jadon'

'I saw you liked my recent 👀👀'

Uh oh. This won't end well.

'yeah'

'do you like what you see? 😜'

There it is.

'eh, ig. cr7 has better abs, though.'

'sure, for now.'

'right. I'll hold you to that.'

'wish you would hold something else, if you know what I mean 😉'

Jesus Christ.

'haha. what were you even drinking in that photo?'

'something exotic 🍹'

'yeah, it looks it.'

'haha yeah. anyways, wyd?'

There it is. The holy grail of fuckboys. The three letters everyone dreads. Oh no. Oh god.

'relaxing, I just got home from work.'

'really? it's almost 8 in the morning.'

'mhm. I worked 11p-7a. I'm tired.'

'are you still working @ the hotel we met at?'

'mhm'

'niceee. I'll be in town tm if you wanna meet up'

'yeah? who's the new lucky girl you'll bring this time?'

'no one. it'll only be us.'

'right. that's what you said last time.'

'this time will be different. I promise. you off tm?'

'yeah'

'ok. meet me at our café.'

'I have things to do too, you know, it's not all ab you Jadon.'

'damn, ok. well, if you decide to come, I'll be there at 12:30.'

'ok.'

'see you then, boo 😘'

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

12:15, you showed up early, as per usual. You were sitting at the table you and Jadon would sit at every time you came, aka the closest to the window.

12:30. You were watching out the window, not taking your eyes away. He was nowhere to be seen.

12:45. He still wasn't there. Why were you even surprised?

1:00. Still no sign of him. You were almost finished with your coffee, and you were getting restless.

1:15. Everyone who had been there when you arrived were long gone, all the tables filled with new customers. You probably looked pathetic.

1:30. An hour after he said he would meet you, and you were fed up. Why did you even bother?

1:35. Nothing. No new messages or anything. You were done.

You walked out, trying your best to conceal your anger. You should be used to this. You should've known. Over an hour of your life wasted.

Just as you get back to your car your phone goes off. With a quick glance, you can tell it's Jadon.

'hey! sorry, something came up. can you do next week? I wanna make it up to you.'

You couldn't believe your eyes. You wasted over an hour,,, for that.

'no, I can't. I'm actually busy next week, and the week after that, & every week for the rest of my life.'

'haha, thats funny. what day can you do next week?'

'I just told you, I'm busy. I just wasted an hour of my life that I could've used doing literally ANYTHING else just for you to say that something came up,, & it was YOUR fucking idea!

'I like to think I'm a patient person, but that just sealed the deal. my god Jadon, I knew you were a fuckboy, I mean, we both joked ab it, but I didn't think it was this bad.

'stop dragging me out like this. just say you're using me for sex and go. I'm sick of getting my hopes up just for you to let me down again. I'm over it, and I'm over you. please fuck off Jadon'

It was marked as read the second it was sent. The three dots would pop up, then disappear, then pop up again. It went on for 2 minutes.

The final result?

'I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you.'

You left him on read.

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

The next day you were back at work for a 3pm - 11pm shift. You had told everyone what happened, and they were angry and upset for you. A few were tempted to text him, but you told them that it would only escalate the already tense situation.

Around 10pm, you were winding down. There was only an hour left in your shift, and you had had a relatively slow day for once. And it seemed like it was going to be a normal shift.

You were sitting in the break room with some of your coworkers, watching a rerun of a golf game which you were, for some reason, invested in.

The bell rang outside, and although you were a bit upset to have to abandon the game, you weren't that upset, considering this was the slowest day you've had in a while.

As you walked out to greet the patron, your heart stopped and your stomach dropped.

It was Jadon, standing there with a white box and a teddy bear.

You glared at him, and a part of you filled with hatred, but the other part gushed at his gesture. He really was going to be the death of you.

"Hey, y/n. I'm really sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean to keep you waiting for over an hour. The reason why I didn't come was because I wanted to get you this."

He paused, gently setting the small box down on the desk, "I tried to get in quickly and pick this up, but the line was so long, I wanted to come and give it to you, but I figured I had kept you waiting long enough, so I called it off."

You're not convinced, but you wanna be. Every part of you wanted to forgive him,, but your stubbornness wouldn't let you.

He sees your shifty glance and sets the bear on the counter as well.

"I'm so so so sorry. I know I fucked up, and you have every right to be angry at me. But even if you never wanna see me again, can you please open it? Just for my sake?"

"If it'll make you leave faster." You respond, intending to sound bitter, but instead sounding shaky.

"I will. I know I can't keep promises, but this one I will. If you don't want to talk to me anymore, I will respect that."

You bite your lip and nod, looking down at the box and undoing the red ribbon. It looked very professional and well done.

As you lift the top off, your eyes widen and fill with tears. You can't help but slap a hand over your mouth.

Inside were all of the polaroids you've taken, ranging from the first time you hung out together, to a few months ago. There were ones of him playing football, and of you in various places doing a gesture that soon became an inside joke. You used to travel together all the time, you miss those days all the time.

The light blue camera used to take all of these photos was inside as well.

Jadon watched as you looked through the photos, a shy smile forming on his face.

"The camera still works, if you want to try it out." He said, voice barely above a whisper.

"Jadon, I-" you hesitated, and for the first time in your life, you were truly speechless.

"There's a, uh, there's a note on the bear." He muttered, looking down and scratching his neck.

You looked at him, and couldn't help but smile a bit. Only Jadon would do this.

Your attention turns to the bear, and sure enough, there was a note attached to its paw. Gently removing the handwritten note stuck to the paw, you read it carefully, clinging on to every word.

'Y/N,

I'm sorry if I hurt you yesterday. And I'm sorry if you feel that all we are is friends with benefits. I've always wanted more with you, but was too afraid to act.

I put up this fboy facade hoping I would attract someone who would be into,, that. But the one thing I didn't take into account was if I fell for someone.

Because my whole life changed when I met you.

I kept this act up, thinking you would be into it and fall for me, but that's not what happened. In fact, when the exact opposite happened, I was shocked.

Nobody liked the real me. That's why I started doing this, because that's what brought people in. And it worked, because it seemed as though everyone else fell for it, everyone except the one person I wanted.

And if I'm being honest, let's talk about the elephant in the room: we both know that I've loved you from the moment we met in this exact building 3 years ago.

You're all I've ever wanted. You're all I will ever want. I'm in love with you.

I'm willing to do whatever it takes to be with you, but it's up to you on whether or not you'll accept.'

A grin appeared on your face as tears streamed down your cheeks.

You looked up at him, a soft yet nervous expression on his face.

You came out from around the counter and threw your arms around him, burying your face in his neck.

"I'll take that as a yes, then?" He joked, making you laugh.

You look up at him. "On one condition."

"And what's that?"

"Stop being such a douche."

"Done. I don't need the facade when I have what I want."

------------------------

thanks for reading! this was my first footballer fic & im actually really proud of it! requests are open, and feel free to use one of the prompts I posted before!

this was for you anon, hope you liked it ;)

#jadon sancho #jadon sancho fanfiction #jadon sancho fanfic #jadon sancho fic #football #soccer #football fic #football fanfic #soccer fanfic #borussia dortmund #dortmund #fanfiction #fanfic #mine

[pinkysfaultorbrainsfault]

animaniacs - season 1 episode 38 - spellbound

episode summary: inexplicably stuck in camelot times, brain tries to get the ingredience for a magic spell that allows the caster to take over the world. this episode has no relation to the other camelot episode and i don't... know why.

the rundown: we begin our episode with the assertion that this is England in 1194. at this point in history, everyone from fire emblem 16 has grown up and is gay married, but we're not focusing on them right now. we're going to camelot and asking about their round table.

lol.

anyway after we see this creepy spider do whatever he's doing, we meet... merlin, i guess.

my dude??? he looks different. did you go on queer eye, merlin? whatever. he technically doesn't say he's merlin, so... maybe he's the other guy? the older guy? who's like merlin's dad?

this fucker. is he in the original king arthur? idk man i only watch cartoons. anyway he is casting a spell and it is very important. important enough to require components from yoko ono, apparently. like she hasn't suffered on this show enough.

but who do we have here?

"mouse" as my flatmate elegantly put it when he walked past the tv room to get a water. but even better than mouse??? mouse in SHORTS. MOUSE IN SHORTS MOUSE IN SHORTS??? MOUSE IN SHORTS. MOUSE IN SHORTS LOOK AT HIS LITTLE LEGYS MOUSE IN SHORTS MOUSE IN. SHORTS MOUSE IN SHORTS. MOUSE IN SHORTS.

YES.

pinky is not wearing shorts, which is incredibly disappointing. he's wearing some sort of sleeveless shirt dress tunic thing in an awful colour that someone like kanye west or justin bieber probably sells on their merch store for like a thousand dollars. he got the yeezy fit, damn. despite the designer status of his clothes, his bedroom eyes still do not convince me.

"i wish i was a windowsill so i could be--! ah. um."

"an imbecile?"

"ah! haha good rhyme, brain!" the bop of the century. kanye west sells the "windowsill" remix in vinyl on his online store for an additional fifty dollars.

after naming a few more celebrities ("I win, you win, edwin newman") the cauldron explodes in a puff of green smoke! and we get!

a pie. “lo!” he cries. “i’ve made a nice pie.”

hm. pinky is impressed. brain is uh. i think he mentally checked out? whatever he's doing i cannot stop fucking laughing at it. i actually had to put this post on pause for longer than anticipated because brain’s stupid face got to me. i’m so sorry. i started writing this at like 11pm gmt on the 11th and it just didn’t get to y’all in time because of brain’s stupid fucking face.

i’m sorry. brain is less impressed and declares it a “waste of magic”, and that he “would never squander such mystical powers over mere pastry.”

“poit. but what if you were eating dinner and you forgot dessert?”

“maybe then.”

but there is trouble afoot! Old Man Merlin has realised that king arthur will want some of his pie, and decides he’d better eat it in the dungeon so that doesn’t happen.

brain takes this opportunity to look through Old Man Merlin’s big book of spells. he “will use merlin’s magic to take control of the world” and then we get another nice closeup of his funny little face.

i don’t know why animaniacs was so keen on doing this? does it happen this much in the reboot? it feels like every episode we stare brain down to assert dominance.

“oh, no, no. where will you find a magic spell for that?”

“in the table of contents, pinky.”

“oh, well, very good.”

(the table of contents also contains a spell to “win at blackjack”, next to the taking over the world spell. brain considers this, for a moment, and then decides now is probably not the time.)

so good thing they have all the components for the magic spell, eh? including the Half Eaten Gingerbread Cookie That’s Been Left On The Counter All Night.

hmm.

oh, wait, no they don’t. turns out they’re fresh out of red dragon toenails, so brain’s solution to this problem is just to... go and get more, which is obviously a thing people do. they have to cross the enchanted forest to do that. it has witches and stuff. pinky rightfully points out that that is a lot of danger to overcome, and brain gets his stealing-the-minivan vibes back and nicks Old Man Merlin’s magic wand. he only knows one spell, but that won’t stop him.

the first obstacle they have to cross is the gingerbread house owned by... witch hazel from looney tunes. she’s a lot less annoying here than in bugs bunny lost in time, and informs brain that she is “waiting for pudgy german children.” instead of taking her suggestion to “get outta here”, brain magics her ass.

charlie sheen, ben vereen, shrink to the size of a lima bean.

they do get their ass handed to them by aforementioned pudgy german children, but then the german children decide that the mice have syphillis and yeet them in the general direction of slappy squirrel, who is here now.

she starts an argument with the goodfeathers, who are also here now, and brain takes it as their cue to leave.

but never mind all that! good thing there’s a handy bridge over this stream!

unfortunately, the bridge likes to spawn Giant Purple Hands That Kidnap Goats, so brain concludes they should cross said bridge using Stealth. unfortunately pinky drops the wand on the source of the Giant Purple Hands, and it is... relatively unhappy.

so brain pulls out the old “ charlie sheen, ben vereen, shrink to the size of a lima bean” again.

i did definitely think the troll was going to kick him in the crotch. i was very much sure of this, actually. instead it yeets him into rita and runt and fucks off.

“for goodness sake boxy” i hear you cry, “aren’t they at the dragon yet! this review has lasted a good twenty years of scrolling down my dashboard!” and i hear you, and you’re right, but the first thing you need to understand is; pinky has spent this whole episode singing. that little guitar he has? he has spent the whole episode replicating windowsill. “we’re in the woods so dark and stinky, to conquer the world, go brain and--” and then he forgets his name and brain has to remind him that it’s pinky. or remind him of his own name, or suggest like, steam to rhyme with stream. that is the running gag of this episode, and it is very important, at this stage, that you know that. pinky has not, as of yet, stopped singing and playing the lute.

so even though they make it to the dragon pretty mucn unscathed (aside from brain getting sat on by a giant, but i won’t go into that unless y’all specifically want details) pinky just has to have his little song in order to keep the dragon asleep.

and then brain yells at him for forgetting the word “sandman”, which breaks the toenail off completely,

and also wakes up the dragon, which can’t be good. it’s not happy! it was growing its’ nails out for paris fashion week.

brain tries his best to rectify this situation.

“charlie sheen, ben vereen--!”

charlie sheen and ben vereen are dead. i’m sorry to have to tell you. they shrunk down so much they got stuck in the quantum zone from antman and the wasp. someone should probably do something about that.

anyway the mice decide to hightail it back to Old Man Merlin’s.

conclusion: 

spoilies: they do make it back in one piece. i won’t detail the whole chase scene because it’s just a bunch of running, because the post is long enough already, and also because tumblr has eaten it three fucking times and i could basically type all this in my sleep now. the things i do for y’all. donate to the wavemaiden.

so pinky shoves all the ingredients into the pot, while brain finds The Take Over The World Spell. the dragon is harassing them this whole time, which feels unfair.

“listen carefully, pinky. i need to recite this spell exactly, and once i start i cannot stop. so i need you to be extra quiet, okay?”

“sure thing, brain.”

this lasts for approximately five minutes.

“brain’s the boss! he’ll rule with ease!”

“mystical powers, your might unfurled, grant that i become--”

“he’s the one! the big, erm. banana?”

“cheese!” yells brain, who has given up entirely by this point. “it rhymes with ease! big! cheese!”

hm.

“are you alright, brain?”

“i feel. odd.”

this is an interesting development.

so brain is cheese now! cool. i guess they have to wait for merlin to get back from Pie Heaven and turn him back, somehow? with his spare wand or whatever. this is definitely pinky’s fault, because brain did ask him to stay quiet for a bit surprisingly nicely (in brain terms) and he... did not. and now brain is a cheese.

on the other hand, this would probably work again if they tried it again, once merlin goes back to pick up some more toenails.

brain: 2 pinky: 3 outside influence: 5

“can i get you anything, brain? some medicine? a cracker?”

“were i not a large cheese, i would make you pay for that remark.”

#patb #animaniacs #pinky and the brain #a! #tumblr has now eaten this four times. #this time i saved the html though. #anyway sorry this took so long the heatwave is making everyone tired xnx

[fullmetalscullyy]

Can I please request some Modern AU with a spoonful of pining/adorkable Roy and tons of fluff? :D :D thank youuuu in advance, Emma!!

so i’ve fallen in love with this oneshot and writing their banter in a modern setting uwu thank you for this tas!! 

also i hope the texting reads well in this format ksjdfjk i realise the format is 14:00pm which is a bit redundant but i didnt notice until reading it back on here aaaaand tbh i’ve waited too long to post this and its 10:30pm so i really can’t be bothered changing it at this point

part 2 | part 3

There was an incessant banging on his apartment door.Stumbling through his living room, Roy cursed as he kicked the corner of hiscouch hard, his toe throbbing. His irritation growing by the second, hisvisitor still banging away on thedoor like there was no tomorrow, he wrenched the door open with a glare. Riza,his neighbour, stood on the other side of the door, hand raised and poised toknock again with an impatient expression.

“What?” he growled irritably.

“Hey,” she greeted brightly, unconcerned about the time andthe sacred rite that was a lie in on a fucking Saturday. “Can I ask you a favour?”

“Riza, it’s Saturday morning.”

“And?” Damn her. Dam her and her ability to rise at six inthe morning any day of the week. The woman had probably never slept past sevenbefore in her life. Roy, on the other hand, appreciated and valued his sleep.

“Saturday,” hestressed slowly. He had finished work late last night and had been lookingforward to his sleep. Now it had been ruined by Riza.

They were good friends and hung out frequently. Starting offas neighbours who politely greeted each other every morning, they quicklydiscovered they shared mutual friends, so it was easy for their relationship todevelop. To Roy it had been the most natural thing. The only down side was saidfriends were both couples and they ended up third wheeling any outing theyattended. Through this, however, they had formed a close friendship, which hedeeply valued.

But when she interrupted his morning by loudly banging on his front door for about five minutes instead ofwaiting for a more respectable hour, Riza really tried his patience.

“Good observation,” she quipped. “Anyway, I need a favour,if you’re up for it?”

Roy sighed, admitting defeat. He rubbed his eyes tiredly,resigned to the fact that for the fourteenth day in a row, he had been woken upat six thirty in the morning.

“What?” he asked irritably.

“I’ve got a work thing tonight and I need you to come withme.” Roy narrowed his eyes critically, eyeing her open and honest expression.

“What’s this really about?”

With a sigh, she finally revealed the truth. “You know thatguy I was dating?”

“The stick?”

Riza huffed. “He’s not a stick.”

“Riza, he’s built like a stick.”

“Anyway, it didn’twork out and now I have… a situation.”

It shouldn’t have excited him so much to hear that herrelationship with Stick Man Dan didn’t work out. Roy wasn’t blind, Riza was abeautiful woman. Plus, he adored her as a friend. They had clicked instantlyand the banter they shared was effortless. If things were to progress furtherbetween them, Roy certainly wouldn’t say no.

“A situation?” Roy asked doubtfully, yawning loudly. “Whatkind of situation?”

“Just some friendly stalking, that’s all.”

That woke him up.“He’s stalking you?”

Riza nodded and Roy didn’t miss the briefest flash of worryappear on her face. “Have you gone to the police?”

Riza nodded. “Yeah, of course, but they won’t do anything.”

“Why?” he asked, unable to keep the anger out of his voice.Regardless of his feelings towards Riza, they should be doing something aboutit.

“Apparently until he does something concrete, and there’sevidence, they can’t charge him.”

“Bullshit.”

Riza’s lips quirked upwards. “I’m inclined to agree. Anyway,it’s fine. I can look after myself. My hope was that you could accompany me tothis thing tonight to try and gently tell him that, you know, I’ve moved on.”

“Yeah, of course,” he replied, tone concerned. “Do you needsomewhere to stay? Is it that serious?”

Riza smiled at him instead of replying, Roy unable todetermine the emotion on her face. “No, thank you. I’m okay.”

“Let me know if you do. And if Stick Man Dan comes around,give me a text or a knock.”

“I will,” she smiled that cryptic smile, expression soft.“Thank you.”

“Okay then. What time do I need to be ready for?”

“Six, if that’s okay?”

“No problem.”

“It’s date,” she grinned.

“But be warned,” Roy added. Riza’s expression turnedexpectant. “Wake me up, banging on my door, at this time tomorrow and I will remove your hands from the ends ofyour arms.”

Riza grinned. “Thanks Roy!” She walked towards the lift, aspring in her step, completely unconcerned about his empty-but-tempting threat.He sighed, closing his door, but smiled as he re-entered his apartment. Anevening with Riza on a “date” didn’t seem so bad.

*          *          *

RM: What do Ineed to wear tonight? 13:44pm

RM: Smart?Casual? We talking tux? 13:44pm

RH: Smart casual is fine.13:51pm

RM: Wow. Thankyou. Much helpful. Very cool. 13:51pm

RH: You’re welcome.13:52pm

RH: Do I detect sarcasm?13:52pm

RM: Your powersof deduction are unparalleled. 13:53pm

RH: Thank you. I pridemyself on that. 13:54pm

RH: Idk just weartrousers and a shirt. 13:54pm

RM: Still nothelpful. 13:55pm

RH: Idk, I’m nota dude. I don’t know what you wear on a night out. 13:55pm

RM: Where is itbeing held? 13:56pm

RH: In a function suite.It’s just a gathering to celebrate a colleague retiring. Dan will be therebecause he was a friend of the retiree and one of my colleagues. 13:57pm

RM: Stick ManDan is friends with old age pensioners? 13:58pm

RM: Riza.13:58pm

RH: Shut your mouth rightnow. I already regret the decision no need to rub it in. 13:59pm

RH: And if you say I toldyou so I will punch you in the face. Guaranteed. 13:59pm

RM: What acatch. 14:01pm

RH: I hope you enjoy thatpunch coming your way in approximately 4 hours. 14:01pm

RM: Hey if noone else will make fun of you for it I’ve got to step up to the plate. 14:05pm

RM: I’m justfulfilling my duty as a friend. 14:05pm

RH: Two punches. 14:05pm

RM: Come at me.I look forward to them. 14:06pm

RM: So… Aboutthat dress code… 14:10pm

RH: Roy. You’re a grownass man. Dress yourself. 14:11pm

RM: Do you wantStick Man Dan to get the message or not? 14:11pm

RH: What, pray tell,message could you send from the way you are dressed? 14:12pm

RM: That I’m asexy motherfucker and you’ve done so much better than him already? 14:13pm

RH: … 14:13pm

RH: Insert picture of melaughing my ass off while rolling my eyes here. 14:13pm

RM: Juststaying true to myself. 14:13pm

RH: Keep telling yourselfthat buddy. 14:14pm

RM: To behonest anyone is a step up from Stick Man Dan. 14:14pm

RH: All right I’m goingnow. I’ve got more important shit to do than tell a grown man how to dress fora “date”. 14:15pm

RH: I thought you were“Mr. Hot Stuff” anyway? Surely you know how to dress for a date. 14:15pm

RH: Wait. 14:17pm

RH: You’ve gone on a datebefore, haven’t you? 14:17pm

RM: I’m noteven going to dignify that stupid question with an answer. 14:22pm

RH: Oh my god. 14:22pm

RH: Hahahaha. 14:22pm

RH: That pause speaksvolumes. 14:22pm

RM: I was inthe bathroom. 14:22pm

RH: TMI dude. 14:23pm

RH: Roy is not the“player” he makes himself out to be. Confirmed. 14:23pm

RH: I can’t wait to tellBecca. 14:25pm

RM: Youwouldn’t dare. 14:24pm

RH: ; ) 14:28pm

RM: Yourloyalties, and any impending betrayals, are noted. 14:29pm

*          *          *

“I’m going to kill you,” Roy grinned, trying to hide hisirritation as they walked arm in arm towards the function room where this partywas being held. “Really, Riza. This time, I will.”

“I’d like to see you try,” she muttered under her breathquickly before greeting a colleague and introducing Roy.

“You told Catalinaof all people.” Riza snickered beside him, steering Roy towards the buffettable. “You lied to her as well.”

“You neither confirmed, nor denied, if it was true.”

“I said I wouldn’t dignify it with an answer,” he bit back,his irritation rising. He couldn’t believeRiza had said to Catalina that he’d never been on a date before. Of course, he had been on a date before.The woman had phoned him up, cackling, asking if it was true. No matter what hesaid, Rebecca refused to accept any other answer.

God, he hated those two when they were together. A force tobe reckoned with, for sure, and often at his expense. Although they were maddening,Roy never minded it really. It was all good fun. However, it was just asentertaining to banter back and forth with Riza about the situation.

“Well, now we know you have,” she deadpanned, picking up apaper plate and filling it with food.

Roy followed suit, a smirk on his face as he shook his headin amusement. “I don’t feel so bad about making fun of you about Stick Man Dananymore. In fact, I don’t feel bad at all.”

“I would care butthat’s history.”

“Doesn’t look like it,” he muttered in her ear, picking outthe Stick Man himself heading their way, his approach unknown to Riza. Roy shothim a polite smile, which was ignored.

“What?” she asked, mid turn.

“Hey, Riza,” Stick Man Dan greeted his ex, still completelyignoring Roy. Thanks, mate.

Roy had never liked him. He was built like a stick, all skinand bones, and taller than anyone Roy had ever met, which did nothing in hisfavour in the appearance department. Every time they met up as a group, hewould completely gloss over everyone who wasn’t Riza, offering only one-wordanswers. Not to mention he hated Roy for some unknown reason. He couldn’tfigure out what it was. Roy would chuckle to himself when he considered StickMan Dan may have felt threatened by him.

Roy had often wondered what Riza saw in him. “As a concernedfriend,” he would tell Hughes and Catalina irritably when they gave each otherThe Look. Said look was a “oh-shit-he-loves-her” look.

Amusement aside, Roy did consider how it looked from anoutsider’s perspective. Both he and Riza were very close. Probably too close inthe opinion of significant others, but nothing had ever happened. It didn’tmean Roy didn’t want it too, but ifRiza wasn’t interested, then so be it. He wasn’t about to mess up thisfriendship and make it awkward by asking her.

As Stick Man Dan ignored Roy, he considered that perhapsthey were close enough that it wouldn’t makeit awkward between them. They told each other everything.

Only one way to find out, however now was not the time.

“So, you’re here with Gerald?” Riza asked him politelygripping Roy’s arm tighter and sliding an arm around his waist. Not expectingsuch close contact, his breath hitched as he ate, but was luckily able to hideit behind that.

“Gerald, unfortunately, was unable to make it tonight,however I thought I would just come anyway to honour Janine.”

Roy frowned. What person comes to a friend’s retirementparty? At said friend’s place of work?

A stalker, looking tosee someone who shot them down.

Roy shifted, wrapping his arm around Riza’s shoulder as hecontinued to eat, staring Stick Man Dan down. His hand came to rest on saidshoulder and he gave it a quick squeeze. Dan seemed to realise who it wasstanding beside Riza, and his eyes flicked to Roy’s briefly, before moving toRoy’s hand on Riza. If a six foot seven bean pole could look dangerous, thenthat’s what Stick Man Dan’s eyes looked like.

And Roy did notlike it.

Apparently, neither did Riza. She was tense underneath his arm,so he rubbed his shoulder in response. This man made her uncomfortable now,that was for sure. That was his job tonight, as a friend, to help her make itthrough this night and get rid of this guy forever. The only way Stick Man Danwould ever take the hint was if they were convincing.

However, he didn’t want to push the boundaries too much –

Oh my god, Roy, chill.You’re here as a friend, that’s it. Nothing more. Just help her out.

“That’s very nice of you,” Riza replied.

Stick Man Dan’s eyes flicked over to Roy’s once more. Oh, so he wasn’t invisible? Who knew? “Iwas wondering if I could talk to you for a minute?”

“Sorry, Janine asked us to come and speak to her after we’vegrabbed a plate,” Riza lied smoothly. Roy watched as the disappointment crossedStick Man Dan’s face, feeling very pleased by the show. Riza begun to walk away,neglecting to offer Dan another chance for his talk, and Roy let his arm drop,regrettably, but followed after her.

“Can you see me?” Roy whispered to her quietly, leaning inclose, as they left Stick Man Dan at the buffet table alone.

“What?” Riza asked, looking up at him, confused.

“Can you see me?” he repeated. “Stick Man Dan acted as if Iwasn’t there and I was wondering if I’ve miraculously achieved the ability toturn invisible.” Riza snorted, loudly. “I mean, it would come in incrediblyuseful. I’ll be disappointed if you cansee me at this point.”

“Shut up,” she laughed quietly, approaching the woman of thehour. “He’s an ass.”

“I honestly don’t know what you saw in him,” Roy joked,sighing dramatically. He would never let on that he was being serious. “I mean,clearly he was a charmer.”

“He never liked you, did he?” Riza smirked, popping asandwich in to her mouth.

“Oh, we were best buds. Me and Dan?” He rose his hand,crossing over his pointer and middle finger. “We were tight, just like that.”

“Shut up,” she chuckled.

The rest of the evening was pleasant. Riza’s colleagues weregood people who welcomed him with open arms. Apparently, they were in on thewhole stalker situation, and were aware of Roy’s role in the night. It didn’tstop them from playing it up, perhaps too much. As much as Roy enjoyedpretending that he and Riza were a couple, that was just it.

Pretend.

“Do you want to go with them?” Riza whispered in his ear.The feeling of her hot breath on his ear made him shiver, goose bumps rising onhis flesh. There were a few people who were going out for the night to a clubnearby. Truthfully, Roy didn’t want the evening to end. He enjoyed having hisarm around Riza as they sat together, their thighs pressed against each other.Holding her hand was something he couldn’t get enough of, and often foundhimself stroking the back of it with his thumb as they sat.

It’s all an act,he kept reminding himself.

But as the night wore on, Roy found he didn’t want it to bejust an act.

So, he agreed to going out to the club.

That was his first mistake.

His second came when they were dancing under the dimlighting, smoke coiling around their legs as they moved dangerously close to one another. Roy saw, rather than felt, hishand reaching out to brush her bangs off her face, his hand curving around hercheek to cup it. Riza’s eyes that had once been on the space between them hadsnapped up to meet his, both their dancing slowly coming to a stop. A thumbbrushed over her cheekbone and Riza’s eyes widened. The music in the clubdulled to a heavy thump, the wordsfading away to become obsolete.

He pressed his lips gently against Riza’s, feeling herbreathing hitch underneath them. His free hand made its way to her waist, handgliding effortlessly across the material of her silk top as it moved around toher lower back. Riza responded eagerly, deepening the kiss after she locked herarms around his neck, pulling him tightly against her body.

For a few moments all was right in the world. This felt good. It felt natural. It made Roywonder why they hadn’t done it sooner. He pulled back, as if his brain finallyrealised what he had done, and who hehad kissed.

Riza was a friend. This was supposed to be pretend. Not thatRiza could hear him, but he stuttered, trying to apologise for oversteppingthat final boundary.

The look in her eyes told Roy she was okay with it.

One of her own hands rose to cup his cheek this time, drawing his lips back against hers.

*          *          *

“Would… Would you like to come in for a coffee?”

Riza smiled tiredly. She had ridden in the lift with her headon his shoulder, eyes closed, and a small smile on her face. It had made Roy’sstomach go crazy and grip her hand tighter as they stood waiting on theirfloor.

That second mistake was working out all right.

“I would love to, but I think I’m just going to go tosleep.”

“See, if you slept in at the weekend, you wouldn’t be sotired at one am.”

Riza smirked but the lift dinged at their floor before she would reply.

“Maybe one day, you could teach me,” she replied, playingcoy, before giving him a wink as she stepped out of the lift. That left Roystaring after her, desire in his eyes.

A hand stilled the one on her door handle, gently but firmlyspinning Riza around so her back was against her apartment door. Roy’s handswere pressed flat against Riza’s apartment door, trapping her head betweenthem. Her surprised squeak was adorable and so was the grin on her face as Roybent to kiss her lips. Since he had done it for the first time in the club, he hadached to do it again.

“See you tomorrow?” Roy murmured, his hands moving slowly upand down her waist.

“See you tomorrow,” she agreed, her face and neck flushedfrom their activities. “You can count on it.”

He bid her goodnight and entered his own empty apartment. Thememory of kissing Riza, the feelings of her skin underneath his hands on herwaist, the softness of her hair as he ran his hands through it feverishly were freshin his mind as they lulled him peacefully to sleep.

Only to be interrupted by incessant knocking on hisapartment door.

At six thirty in the morning.

There is only one person…

Gearing up for his charade of being truly irritated, butready to joke with his friend, his retort about removing her hands from theends of her arms died on his tongue. One look at Riza’s face told him this visitwas different. She looked… scared?

“Can… Can I stay here?” Her voice was hesitant and quiet,almost fearful. His irritation gone after hearing her speak, Roy opened thedoor wider so she would enter his apartment. He was worried. Riza never looked like this.

“Yeah, of course. Is everything okay?”

Riza shook her head, offering him her phone instead ofreplying. Apprehensively, Roy took the phone from her unresisting hands.

Unknown Number: Riza weneed to talk. I didn’t like what I saw tonight. I don’t like you spending timewith that guy. I won’t allow it. 06:21am

Roy looked up at her from the screen. Her eyes were castdown towards the floor, not looking at him in the eye.

“I got that this morning, a few minutes after I woke up.”

He tried to reign in his anger. He really did. Was he watching her? The thought made himphysically ill and see red at the same time. “This happen often?” he askedcurtly, but somehow, he already knew her answer.

“Yes,” she replied in a small voice.

“Has it ever escalated?” Riza was silent and that was theonly answer Roy needed. “Why didn’t you tellme?”

“I could handle it,” she replied, voice stronger now. “Buteven after last night he still hasn’t gotten the hint and…”

“What?”

“I’m scared,” she whispered. “I’m scared of what he might do,of what he’s possibly already done, and I… I don’t want to be alone right now.Especially not in my apartment.”

Roy closed the door behind her, putting the chain across it,as if a reassurance that Dan wouldn’t get anywhere near her. Not while Roy wasaround anyway.

“Block that number after you’ve reported him to the police,”Roy told her. “I’ll drive you down there tomo – Well, at a more respectablehour,” he quipped.

“Why don’t we just go now?” Riza asked, confused. Ah, of course, Misswhat-is-sleeping-past-six-am?

“I’m going back to bed,” Roy told her. “And – only if youwant to – you can learn the benefits of sleeping past six am at the weekend.”

His attempt at humour was only to try and lighten the mood –to try and take Riza’s mind off things – and he was pleased to see she fellinto step with him, their banter coming easily to each other. He was thrilledto learn thigs weren’t different between them, despite what happened tonight.

Riza’s lips quirked up and her posture relaxed. Instead ofher arms hugging her body, they moved into the front pocket of her hoodie. “Andwhat benefits would those be?”

“Waking up next to me?” he offered with a smirk.

Riza sighed, cocking her head as if to consider hisproposal. “I think I like that benefit. Are there anymore?”

Roy grinned widely as he closed the distance between them,kissing Riza Hawkeye like his life depended on it.

God, it felt good.

#royai #royai fic #royai fanfic #royai oneshot #fic request #writing prompts #emma writes #ruikosakuragi #ask #hold my hand

[cottonblush]

wild(t) love | zcl, kjw

❧ word count: 1,414

❧ genre: crack lmao

❧ notes: ohmygod i can’t believe this is the first story i’m posting on here i literally wrote this for my friend at 11pm yw rochenle!!

when you first learn that you’re going to be working at sm entertainment you almost cry

bc you’re still in college and struggling™ and this opportunity is a blessing

and you can’t wait to start bc then you’ll get to see your childhood friend jungwoo again

also bc sm is so well known you get to travel with the groups and your college will like let you make up tests and stuff

let’s face it sooman is that! powerful ceo

anyway so you go into it thinking oh it’d be nice to see jungwoo like once in a while

bc you were told you’d be the assistant manager for the rookies

but last minute they’re like LMAO NOpe and they assign you to nct 127

and you’re like !!!! jungwoo is in that group wow am i blessed or am i blessed

so like a month into the job you go to this meeting and they’re like

for nct’s next concept we’ll be going to a jungle to take the pictures we’re going for that wiLDT concept

and you’re like ?? i mean extra but ok sure

and the next thing you know you’re on a plane with nct 127 going to some remote jungle

you, jungwoo, and doyoung are random stuff and like gossiping

also jungwoo is hitting on you and doyoung like at the same time

wow we love a flirt

haechan and mark are having their summer fight 2.0 bc haechan said there’s no difference between coke and pepsi and mark is like sTFU U DUMB BINCH OFC THERE IS I CAN’T ASSOCIATE WITH UNCULTURED SWINE UGH

taeyong, yuta, and jaehyun are watching a basketball anime and do some complex handshake every time the protagonist scores a point

johnny is sitting there still giggling to himself about that time ten said john’s banana even though it’s been like a decade

winwin and and lucas are conversing in chinese and to everyone else they sound like intellectuals bc like,,, the chinese language sounds bEAUTIFul don’t even deny it

but irl lucas is asking winwin how many calories are in a booger and winwin’s like idk man i mean probably like 2 they can’t be that unhealthy

this in turn causes lucas to think that one can survive on boogers bc they won’t gain weight but it’s still food

and then winwin has to explain that you need 2,000+ calories a day so lucas would need to pick 1,000 different noses every day

taeil is still sulking about the fact that yuta stole the seat next to winwin from him

he finds a little bug on the floor and somehow starts an inner monologue like ‘i feel u my friend i know how it is to feel alone and unwanted and not appreciated like this one sided love is really killing us buddy’

but like taeil, sweetie, it’s a bug so it clearly can’t relate

and then taeil sees another bug crawl up to the bug and they creep away together

and he goes ‘oh i see… i guess i truly am alone’ and like a single tear rolls down his cheek as he pulls out his phone and opens up his sad violin music playlist that has like 600 songs

yall get there in like 45 minutes so you’re like lol they said remote jungle watch it be like some dog park

but then you get off the plane and literally choke on your own words bc like,, issa jungle

you guys are told that there’s a secret cabin thing nearby and members will come individually to the jungle each day to take concept pictures so that the group can have a lil vacation

jungwoo is supposed to take his pictures on the third day and it’s finally time so he, you, another manager, and the photographer’s crew drive out to the jungle

and take some saucy pictures

but then a problem arises bc jungwoo sees a snake (it’s actually just a vine that fell from a tree but you figure you should at least save some of his pride) and screams but like soft screams so only you notice

and he like zooms,,, usain bolt? more like jungwoo bolt

you have to go after him bc otherwise you would probably be murdered if fans found out you let jungwoo go into a jungle alone

and somehow the crew just assumes yall ran back to the van so they take off without you

so when you two get back you’re like uHHHHH where yall @ stop playing

jungwoo starts panicking and genuinely thinks you two are going to die and you’re lowkey offended bc you’re thinking ‘my survival skills are excellent thank you very much at least i don’t have a heart attack every time i see a plant’

but all of a sudden you hear this really loud scream

or it’s more like a yell?? or like a cry or a shout? you honestly don’t know

it sounds like tarzan though and you wanna laugh but are also worried at the same time

the trees rustle a lot so you look up and you see some random boy with like

grass green hair and he’s only wearing a leaf skirt and a coconut bra

and you wanna question it like why the bra?? bc it just looks uncomfortable

anyway so this guy is like swinging through the vines when he sees you and he stops and stares for what seems like forever

he starts speaking but yall cant understand him bc somehow his sentences are a mix of korean, chinese, and arabic

you know it’s arabic bc you hear marhaba and you’re like ayEE shoutout to my foreign language teacher in 7th grade your class finally came in handy

so you try to speak back to him and he understands you bc he just launches off a tree, lands in front of you, and speaks fluent korean

and you just go ‘bro what’s up with the arabic’

and he shrugs his shoulders and explains that the last visitor he had spoke arabic and taught him the language

you and jungwoo share a look like,,, visitor? does he have a house or smth

and the guy laughs and is like i’ll take you there!! but i should probably introduce myself my name is chenle

you guys take turns sharing about yourself as chenle leads the way to some mystery location

which turns out to be this giant tree house mansion

and you’re questioning him like did u build this yourself bc no offense dude but ur kinda skinny’

and jungwoo is just in awe and he’s like heck yeah he’s skinny! a skinny leGEND

chenle’s like lol no the monkeys built this for me

uh?? monkeys

and sure enough a group of about 25 monkeys comes into the mansion and like surrounds the three of you and starts inspecting you and jungwoo

one of them sits on your shoulder and chenle smiles and goes ‘oh great they approve of u’

and you go ‘oh that’s chill i guess’

chenle: yeah it’s great it means they won’t beat u with coconuts

you, jungwoo: um wHAT

chenle: [innocent smile]

anyway it’s been quite a day and jungwoo says he’s tired so the monkeys lead him to a couch and sit him down

and you and chenle just talk about stuff and hours go by like seconds

and as you two watch the sunset through the trees

chenle turns to you and asks

i know we just met but i feel like we’re soulmates and u get me will u marry me

and you’re about to respond when you’re interrupted by jungwoo’s slightly sleepy voice saying ‘heCk no y/n is mine binch back off’

and you’re like ‘guys guys calm down let’s not-’

chenle cuts you off and goes ‘yeah you heard her let’s be calm there’s plenty of love to go around we can just share her affection’

jungwoo agrees bc he’s half asleep and bc he thinks that the lil monkeys that helped him with everything are so convenient and he could get used to this life

and that’s how you start the rest of your life with your two husbands in a remote forest in an undisclosed location

and like yall don’t know it but the rest of nct is going crazy trying to find yall but chenle’s monkey family keeps them away so you guys can live happily ever after

#zhong chenle #zhong chenle scenarios #chenle #chenle scenarios #chenle scenario #nct scenario #nct scenarios #nct x reader #zhong chenle x reader #chenle x reader #nct crack fic #nct china #nct crack #kim jungwoo #jungwoo #kim jungwoo scenarios #kim jungwoo scenario #jungwoo scenario #jungwoo scenarios #kim jungwoo x reader #jungwoo x reader #nct chenle #nct jungwoo #nct au #chenle au #jungwoo au #nct imagines #chenle imagines #jungwoo imagines #i cant believe im posting this

[death-noot]

1-116 👈👈😎

lez do this 

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now? kinda just confused about whether or not im making the right choice moving back home idk 

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? sure do

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care? of course not 

4: Do you find it easy to trust others? most of the time yeah 

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night? trying to sleep 

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you? deffo my pal madi, we’ve done this multiple times

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on? i honestly dont know 

8: Are you close with your dad? sure am

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right? the human i kiss is 7 hours away from me so sadly i did not. 

10: What are you listening to? tell me that i’m wrong by future jr. 

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it? fk me probably like juice or somethin 

12. Do you like hickeys? yess

13: What time do you go to bed? usually about 10ish

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down? nah 

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both? god no 

16: Do you always answer your texts? ya 

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for? nope i love her quite a bit 

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends? earlier today

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them? multiple people 

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?i hope we’re okay 

21: Is anyone else in the room with you? nope  

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around? definitely 

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now? im much happier now 

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with? nah 

25: In the past week, have you cried? nope

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing? kinda a navy blue 

27: Do people ever call you by your last name? yep 

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now? dont think so 

29: Do you have a best friend? ye

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed? depends on the context of the kisss 

31: Who was your last call from? my sister 

32: Are you mad at anyone? nope 

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you? lol yes 

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday? 25 

35: How many more days until your birthday? fk like just under a year 

36: Do you have any summer plans yet? kinda  

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex? not really 

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now? nope 

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone? nope

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone? yuP

41: Do you think age matters in relationships? obviously yes like if someones in their teens but i feel like past that its not so bad 

42: Are you available? depends on what that means 

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended? 2

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get? nose probs 

45: Do you believe exes can be friends? ye

46: Do you regret anything? REALLY regret leaving school 

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now? my girlfriend bc im gay 

48: Did you ever lose a best friend? ye

49: Was your last kiss a mistake? no

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like? she’s already mine but i never wanna stop trying to impress her 

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry? nope

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed? yes jesus christ 

53: What was the last thing you ate? a schnitty 

54: Did you get any compliments today? dont think so 

55: Where are you going on your next vacation? goin to see the girly 

56: Do you own anything from other countries? yep 

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls? girls 

58: Where have you lived most of your life? always lived in the same small town 

59: When was the last time you took a long drive? today 

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle? nope

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house? nope

62: Who do you text the most? Rach 

63: What was the last movie you saw? the happytime murders i think 

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex? hopefully a lot of things

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2010? none lmfao 

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you? only by a few months 

67: Do you curse around your parents? ye

68: Are you happy with where you live? fuck no 

69. Picture of yourself? i cbf right now i’ll post one tomorrow lmao  

70. Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships? monogamous, i get rly possessive lmao 

71. Have you ever been dumped? kinda 

72. What do you most like about making out? all the grabbing and lil noises   73. Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with? mhm

74. When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other? the other 

75. What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive? eyes 

76. Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed? rach 

77. Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour? nope 

78. Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name? nope 

79. What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face? rach, jesus im soft 

80. Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? probably not

81. Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you? ya 

82. Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush? not really 

83. Do you miss your last sweetie? what does this mean 

84. Last time you slow danced with someone? nope 

85. Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met? kinda 

86. How can I win your heart? be urself, make me laugh, do nice things for me

87. What is your astrological sign? scorpio 

88. What were you doing last night at 12 AM? sleepin 

89. Do you cook? not often 

90. Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication? nope

91. If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship? 

92. Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly? i feel like i fall into monogamy pretty quick 

93. What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest? funny, kind, considerate, 

94. Name four things that you wish you had: money, full licence, money, money

95. Are you a player? nah 

96. Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day? nope

97. Are you a tease? I’ve been told i can be lmao 

98. Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr? i think so 

99. Have you ever been deeply in love with someone? rn  

100. Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with? platonic dates sure 

101. Hugs or Kisses? b o t h 

102. Are you too shy to ask someone out? usually lmao 

103. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? how tall they are or their hair tbh 

104. Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe? luv it 

105. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it? tbh probably i’m a dick 

106. Do you flirt a lot? not really 

107. Your last kiss? rach 

108. Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2011? how old is this 

109. Have you kissed anyone in the past month? ye 

110. If you could kiss anyone who would it be? r a ch 

111. Do you know who you’ll kiss next? guess 

112. Does someone like you currently? u kno it 

113. Do you currently have feelings for anyone? this is so repetitive 

114. Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? relationships

115. Ever made out with just a friend? no

116. Are you happier single or in a relationship? relationship

#yakofalltrades #answered

[babyjiminiexx]

Just In Case

Pairing: You x Jin, mentions the other members

Warning: 100% fluff, naked scene but not smut 

Words: 2645

A/N: This wasn’t a request, but I suddenly felt really inspired so I decided to post this fic so you guys had something to read before I post your requests. Also i feel like this could be a serie or something, idk, you tell me if you like it and if you’d like it to continue! Enjoy! ;)

Summary: You’re one of Bangtan’s back up dancers. One day, at the rehearsals, you were having a fun with the rest of the dancers and started dancing ridiculously; and that’s when the members of BTS approached you, joining your dance. And since that day, you became friends, thing that wasn’t common between back up dancers and idols. But they didn’t care, they liked you. You hung out with them, danced with them when back up dancers were supposed to leave the dance room, etc… They were like the big brothers –since you were younger than them- you’ve never had. But you didn’t know that one of them was seeing you as more than that. And you were about to know it.

You could feel the music through every inch of your body, every pore of your skin.

You absolutely loved dancing. It was your way to escape from the reality and free yourself.

Left. Right. Right. Left.

You moved your arms, your head and your legs in rhythm to one of your favorite songs. It was an amazing feeling.

All your life you felt like something was missing. You tried to do a lot of things; karate, piano, athletics… But was when you decided to try dancing when you finally found what you needed. You felt accomplished every time you danced, even when you didn’t have the moves completely right.

You could spend hours and hours in a dance room practicing.

And this day was one of these days.

You moved your legs in sync and lowered your waist, rolling it and pulling one arm over your head.

“Yah! Y/N! I didn’t know you had those moves!” A familiar voice made you stop everything.

“God, guys, I didn’t hear you entering.” You said, heavy breathing.

Jin left his bag on the floor right next to the door while the other ones greeted you.

A few minutes later, the crew of back up dancers and the choreographer entered the room.

“Okay, guys. Ready to learn the new choreo?” He asked clapping his hands.

“Go ahead!” Said Jungkook.

You went to the back with the rest of the crew, while the members of the group were in front of you, led by the choreographer.

The teacher showed you once the full choreo; it seemed a little rough, but you were confident.

But you started feeling less confident as the time ran out. You couldn’t have some moves right and the choreographer was getting angry. At one point, he didn’t even bothered hiding it. He went to the back, took your arms roughly and placed your legs as he requested it for the dance.

You raised your head to see everyone looking at you; Bagtan’s members looking worried.

“Y/N, FOCUS! It’s not difficult!” He screamed at you.

“I know, I’m sorry… I’ll try again…” You said, already exhausted.

“Yes you will! You’re not useful to us if you’re not capable of doing a simple choreo correctly!”

“I’m sorry…” You excused yourself again.

“Let’s make a pause! 10 minutes!” He said before getting out of the room.

You went for your bag, took you bottle of water and sat on the floor, head between your hands.

“You’re not useful to us if you’re not capable of doing a simple choreo correctly!” The teacher’s voice was still in your head.

You had to work harder. You needed this job. It wasn’t really well paid, but it was enough for you to pay your rent and buy food. If they decided to fire you, you would be in a really bad situation.

“Hey… Are you okay?” You saw a blond head sitting in front of you while a hand started rubbing your back. Jimin and Tae always came to you when you were having a bad time, even if they weren’t supposed to. They didn’t like to see you like this.

“Mmhh… Yeah, it’s nothing.” You said.

“Y/N, look at your arm…” Taehyung took delicately your left arm, were the choreographer left a purple mark.

“It’s nothing. I’ll do better.”

“He can’t treat you like this…” Jimin said.

“And what can I say? I’m just a back up dancer. Like he said, I’m not important.” You raised your shoulders.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Jin approached you with a panicked look. “He can’t do that to you! It’s unfair!”

“A lot of things are unfair, Jinnie.” You said. “Anyways, I’m still here. So I’ll work hard to keep my place.”

“But you already work so hard…” Jin said.

“Not enough.”

You stayed a few minutes talking to the boys, Hoseok, Yoongi, RM and then Jungkook joining you.

“I’m sure you’ll do well. I know you and I know you’ll work hard enough to get this. And of course you will stay with us.” The maknae of the band was as competitive as you are, so he could understand you.

“Just don’t push you to hard, okay?” Asked Hoseok.

“Okay. Thank you guys.” You said with a smile. They always knew how to cheer you up.

“Pause over!” The teacher entered the room again, making you all growl.

“So let’s do this again…”

One, two, three hours passed. It may sound a lot, but it’s what’s normal there. They make you practice a lot.

“Okay, guys. Keep practicing, ‘cuz some of you need it.” You could see his eyes on you. “I’ll see you on Friday, same time.”

The crew and the band members applauded him and they started packing their things.

You were all exhausted. It had been and intense day.

“You coming with us?” Asked Tae.

“Uhm… No, I’ll stay here a little bit more.” You told him.

“Y/N… It’s almost 11pm…”

“Jin, I’m okay. I’ll just practice for half an hour and then I’ll go home.” You lied. You wanted to learn the choreo entirely. He looked at you with worried eyes, but he nodded and got out of the room, followed by the others.

You waited for them to turn off the lights outside and you put some music. And the half an hour practice turned into an almost two hours practice.

You were absolutely exhausted. You could barely feel your legs and your head had turn into drums.

You were so focus in the choreo that you didn’t even notice Jin standing arms crossed in the frame of the door.

“I thought you said half an hour.” He said loudly.

You startled.

“Jesus!” You took your arms to your heart. “Can’t you… make a noise… or something… before entering a room…” Your breath was heavy and irregular.

“I wanted to check on you. And I can see it was a good idea.”

“Why?”

You were now in a squat position, with your arms resting on your knees, head down.

“You’re exhausted, Y/N, you can’t stay here. Plus, it’s 1.30am.”

“Wow, already?”

“Yeah, now come on. I’ll get you home.” He said helping you get up.

“Jin… Wait…”

You started to feel your head turning. Your breath became more irregular.

“What?”

“I’m not feeling well…”

And with that, you’re vision started to blur and your knees abandoned you. The last thing you saw was Jin catching you before you could reach the floor.

“…Y/N! Y/N! Hey! Look at me!” He slapped your face a little bit.

“Mmmh…”

“Okay, there here…”

You could feel the cold temperature of the floor on the back of your heard, but you didn’t move. You couldn’t.

And right away, you felt Jin’s hands on the back of your neck and on your back.

“Okay, it’s going to be cold…” He advertised you.

He spilled a little bit of water on your hot skin. It felt amazing. Your body temperature was so high, you needed something like this.

“Now help me a little here, please…”

He helped you sitting and raised your shirt.

“What are you doing?” You said almost in a murmur.

“You need to get out of these clothes.”

“I’m fine…”

“No, you’re not.”

You were now in your bra.

Jin took the bottle again and spill water on your chest, then on your forehead.

It took you a moment to open your eyes again.

“Better?” He asked.

“Mmhh… Yeah…”

“Come on, you need a shower.” He helped getting up by putting your arm on his shoulders and his on your waist. But your legs abandoned you again, so you almost fell.

“God… Come here.” He took you bride style and went through to door to the changing rooms, where there were showers.

He left you on one of the bench, making sure you were still with your eyes open. You looked at him and he nodded.

He went to one of the showers and turned on the water, not too hot but not too cold either.

“You need help undressing yourself?” He asked gently.

“Why do you want me to undress?” It was a stupid question, but you were a little confused. You weren’t thinking clearly.

“You need to get into the shower, but you have to get off of these clothes.”

“Oh… Okay…” You said.

And you started to undress. It wasn’t easy. It felt like your body didn’t want to respond.

“Let me help you.”

He approached you and helped you getting up and lowered your leggings.

If you had been lucid, you would have probably felt so embarrassed being there in underwear in front of your friend. But you didn’t care; you only wanted to feel the water on your skin.

He helped you to get off of your bra and panties and drove you to the shower.

You let out a heavy breath when you felt the water on your body. You really needed this.

“Are you okay?” Jin asked, worried.

“Yes. It feels good.”

You turned your face to face him, and you could see how embarrassed he was and how hard it was for him to not look at you.

“Uhm… Sit down. I’ll wash your hair.” He told you.

And so did you. You sat on the cold floor of the shower and Jin came back with a little bottle of shampoo in his hand.

“I don’t know if this is the correct one… But I hope it will be enough…” He said looking at the bottle.

You embraced your knees and lowered your head a little bit so he could wash your hair easily.

You felt his hands full of shampoo running through your hair delicately, trying to not hurt you.

You couldn’t help but close your eyes at this feeling.

“Y/N?” He stopped his movements.

“Yes, I am here, don’t worry.” You slightly smiled.

He breathed, relieved and went back to his work.

You couldn’t see him but you imagined how concentrate he was. You could feel it. You imagined him trying to not hurt you by pressing his hands too hard on you head. You imagined his concentrated look on his face. And this made you giggle.

“What’s so funny?” He asked.

“Nothing. It’s just weird to be here with you washing my hair.” You said, a little more awakened.

“Hey, I’m sure I’m doing this pretty good!”

“Yes you are.” You laughed.

You could hear him laugh too.

“Okay, raise your head. I’m going to take off the shampoo.”

You did as he said and again, his hands were through your hair, cleaning it from all the shampoo.

“Can you wash yourself now?”

“Yes, I think I can.”

He handed you soap and turned away, a hand on the back of his neck.

You washed your body and took your time letting the water roll on your body. You turned away and saw Jin looking at you.

“Oh! Uhm… There. For you.” He handed you a green towel and you rolled it around you.

“Thanks.”

“Your welcome…” He said shyly.

“I mean it. I don’t know what would had happened if you hadn’t been there.”

“Stop thinking about that and start dressing up, you’ll catch a cold.” He smiled.

You were going to get your bag when you realized you didn’t bring clean clothes with you.

“Shit. I don’t have anything to wear.”

“Uhm… Take my sweater, I have a shirt under.” And he took it off and gave it to you.

It was almost like a dress. The sleeves were long and made you look absolutely adorable in it.

“It smells like you.” You told him, smelling the collar of the clothing.

You were a little more lucid now, so you didn’t know why you said it. You started blushing inmediatly.

“And you look cute in it.” He smiled again.

You blushed even more.

“Come on, you’ll sleep in my room tonight.” His hand reached yours.

“I can go home you know.”

“I prefer getting an eye on you, just in case.”

“And what about Yoongi?” You asked.

“He’ll understand. I’ll explain to him tomorrow when he gets up.”

You nodded and followed him again to the dance room, where you packed your things, then headed to the dorms.

Everyone was sleeping, so you didn’t make a sound.

“Here.” He opened the door of his room and you heard someone snoring.

“Wow.” You laughed silently.

“I know. Sometimes I don’t even sleep.” He laughed back.

“Jin, shut the fuck up…” Yoongi said in a sleepy voice.

“Don’t worry, he’s still sleeping.” Jin said.

You giggled and headed to Jin’s bed.

“Okay, I-I’ll be on the couch if you need me…” He said as you slid between the sheets.

“Wait, Jin…” He turned back. “Stay. You know, just in case.” You use the same excuse as him earlier.

He noticed it and you could see him blushing even in the dark.

“Make room for me.” He smiled and lied on the bed.

He turned to face you. And stayed watching you a few seconds.

“Why do you do this?” You asked.

“Do what?”

“Treat me like this.”

“You were exhausted, I couldn’t let you like that.” He said.

“Yeah, but I don’t know, you could have driven me home or something.”

“Mmhhh…” He hid his face with his arms.

“What?” You laughed.

“I prefer having you here.”

“Yeah. Just in case, right?” You laughed again.

“Jin, I’ll fucking murder you if you don’t shut up…” Yoongi threatened him again.

Both of you started laughing in silence.

“Right…” Said Jin looking at you again.

And you closed your eyes.

You were half asleep but you could feel Jin’s eyes on you, but neither of you said anything.

The noises of laughs and people talking woke you up the next morning. You were so comfortable in his bed so you didn’t move.

Sheets smelling like him.

You didn’t know how it could be possible, but it was your new favorite smell.

You heard Yoongi getting out of his bed and you froze.

What reaction would have the boys when they would see you?

“Okay, Jin, can you explain why you have a girl in your bed?” Asked Yoongi as he arrived in the kitchen.

“What?!” All the boys turned to Jin.

“It’s not what it looks like…” He started justifying himself. But it wasn’t enough, the six men ran to his bedroom and crowded together at the door.

“Who is this?” Murmured Jungkook.

“God I hope you didn’t do anything next to me guys. This is disgusting.” Said Yoongi.

“Wait, is she even moving?” Asked Namjoon.

“If Jin did anything to her I doubt it…” Joked Taehyung making everybody laugh, except Jin, who rolled his eyes.

He entered his room and shook you slightly.

“Y/N, get up… You have public.” He laughed.

“Y/N?!” The boys exclaimed.

You rolled over the sheets with a shy smile.

“Hi…”

“OH MY GOD!” Jimin screamed.

“No, no, no. It’s not like that.” You tried to calm them.

“Then how?!” Asked Jungkook.

You and Jin proceeded to explain last night’s episode and why you were there.

“Ooooh… That makes sense.” Hobi looked at you. “Are you okay now?”

“Yes, I feel okay, don’t worry. I was just really tired last night.”

“Well, I thought that Jin finally had confessed to you.” As soon as the words fell out of Tae’s mouth, Jin covered his lips with his hand.

“AH! Taehyung! You and your sense of humor!” He said nervously.

You didn’t know what to do. You looked at him right in the eyes, confused and you couldn’t help but blush.

But you decided to don’t say anything and smile at him. If he had feelings for you, you’ll let him take his time before confessing.

He just smiled back. A big bright smile. The most beautiful you’ve ever seen.

#bts #bts fic #bts scenarios #bts fluff #bts smut #bts angst #bts imagines #jin #seokjin #jin smut #jin fluff #jhope #hoseok #yoongi #suga #rm #namjoon #junkook #jimin #taehyung

[my-emotional-self]

Crowded (Chris Evans x Reader)

Request: Idk if you’re taking any requests or not but can I request a one-shot where reader is shopping at a crowded street and she slightly gets anxious at how crowded and unsafe the streets are at night then she bumps into her crush Chris Evans and he offers to be her chaperon for the night and she feels safer? Thank you

Requested By: @dramaqueenlito

Word Count: 2,342

A/N: Ok, I got a bit carried away with this, sorry it’s so long! I hope you like it.  This is my first request ever.  I wasn’t even planning on doing requests, but I got one, and I thought it was a nice little break from the series I’m working on.  Enjoy!

 Thanksgiving was always a stressful time for you as it always seemed so hectic.  You were born and raised in Boston, but moved a few years ago to Newport, Rhode Island.  Being a freelance photographer was a dream job for you.  You were able to take the jobs you wanted, dictate your own schedule, and most importantly, less people to deal with.  You were always anxious around big crowds of people, which is one of the reasons you decided to move out of Boston.  Sure, you could have stayed in Massachusetts at least, but you wanted something different.  That was how you found Newport in Rhode Island.  A population of 25,000 people was much more appreciated in your eyes compared to Boston’s 673,000; and it was only an hour and 45 minute drive away.  

That’s where you found yourself for Thanksgiving, at your parents’ house, along with all your siblings. You made the drive two days ago, trying to beat that last minute rush of people; you did not want to deal with that kind of traffic.  

You were all sitting around the dining room table, eating the delicious meal you helped prepare with your mother and sister.  While Thanksgiving was stressful, you were thankful for your family and how they always supported you in what you did.  Your sister started talking about Black Friday shopping and you cringed. You didn’t understand what all the fuss was about.  Was it worth waiting in line for hours to get the cheapest brand TV, which you know would break within a year or two?  

Your sister noticed your reaction and just had to pipe in her remarks.  “Oooh, is Y/N going to be a wet blanket again and not come shopping with us?”

“Wet blanket?  Really Y/S/N?  Is that the best you could come up with?” you glared back at her.  You loved your sister of course.  You and your siblings always had that annoying “no matter how old we are we will always pick on each other” thing going on.  It was all fun and games, until someone made a bet.  You couldn’t back down from a bet.  No one in your family could; that’s just how competitive you were.

Your sister gave you a villainous grin, and you knew what was to come.  “Damnit” you scolded internally.  She was going to make a bet about going Black Friday shopping.

“I bet you couldn’t last the entire night Black Friday, without mom or me!” your sister said, loud and proud.

“And what do I get if I win?” you asked, trying not to sound too nervous.  Black Friday shopping was something you had nightmares about.  The crowds of people; congestion of bodies everywhere.  Hell, people have been trampled to death before!!  

“I will pay for anything photography related, as long as it stays below the $250 limit” your sister stated, pretty sure of herself that she would win.

You probably would have just thrown in the towel when she first announced it.  Your anxiety of crowds and crowded places at night not worth anything, until she said what your winnings would be.  Photography was not only your life, but your job, and you could always use a few upgrades to go with your camera, seeing as some of it was expensive.  You just couldn’t pass up this bet; it was too good.

“You got yourself a deal dear sister!”

“YES!  Ok, we will all ride to the mall together, but then you will split up from us.  I will be texting you ever hour for a reminder, and at that time, you have to snap a picture of yourself in front of a store.  AND it has to be a different store each time.  You can stay in the mall, or go outside to the boutiques.  I really don’t care, as long as I get a picture every hour.  Deal?”

“Deal” you say as you extend your hand across the table to shake your sisters.  A deal was never cemented until you shook on it.  

A few hours later, you were waiting in line to the mall.  Standing in a long ass line full of people, bundled up in a jacket and scarf, shivering.  The streets were littered with people.  Everywhere you looked there were people standing and walking.  It reminded you of Times Square in NYC.  Your anxiety started creeping up and you felt yourself getting restless.  The stores and malls that aligned downtown Boston would all be opening at the same time in a matter of seconds.  You felt your heart rate increase a bit as you anxiously waited, hoping the night would go by fast.  

Up ahead you heard people start to cheer and you knew the mall doors were opening.  People started pushing forwards and your breath hitched. You clung to your sisters’ hands until you made it inside the mall, and she let go.  

“It’s 11pm now Y/N, so I expect a picture the first picture of you at midnight.  Go buy some stuff while you’re out tonight” your sister says to you as she starts to speed walk deeper into the mall.

People were rushing all around you to get to their designated stores; for their damn deals. You were getting pushed around in all different directions.  You felt your breathing becoming really shallow, thoughts of impending death from being trampled running through your mind.  You needed air; you needed to get outside to get some fresh air before you collapsed.

You started jogging towards the front door but nothing was working.  People came stampeding towards you to get into the mall, while you were struggling to get outside.  You felt the sweat start to bead on your forehead, your jacket making your body feel like you were wearing a sweater and ugg boots on a July day in Arizona.  

After pushing past people for what felt like hours, you finally broke free and stumbled towards a lamp post.  You hung onto it for dear life; you were trembling and started to hyperventilate. Nobody was paying attention to you, or trying to help you.  Until he showed up.

“Hey, hey are you okay miss?” you heard a man’s voice ask you.

You could barely breathe, let alone talk, so you just shook your head violently back and forth.

“You need to sit down. Can I help you to a bench?” he asked.

“Pl-please” you choked out.

He gently put his hand on your back and pried your hand off the lamp post.  You kept your head down, watching where you were walking so you wouldn’t fall down; the man had your arm gripped tightly, yet affectionately, so he could guide you to sit down.

Once you reached the bench, you plopped down, trying to take deep breaths.

“Lean your head down a little” you did as he said, “there you go, now concentrate on deep breaths.”

As your mind started to clear up and you could concentrate a little more, you listened to his voice. It sounded oddly familiar to you. He kept talking to your throughout your attack, telling you encouraging words.  

It took a few more minutes, but you were able to regain your breathing and your shaking subsided.  You perch your head up and turn to the left, looking into the eyes of the man who saved you, and realized who it was. Chris Evans just saved you.  You couldn’t believe your eyes; maybe it was your brain being foggy from everything that happened.  You’ve had a massive crush on him for years!

“Thank you” you say to him, a thankful smile appearing on your face.

“It’s really no problem, I’m Chris” he says extending his hand to you.

You take his hand in yours, and you can’t quite explain it, but you felt safe there with him.  

“Y/N” you respond, “and I’m actually a big fan of yours”, blush immediately creeping onto your face.

You didn’t lie there. You loved his movies, and not just Avengers and Captain America.  

“Thank you” he says with a chuckle.  “I always love to meet my fans.  So, you doing some Black Friday shopping?”

“Uhh, well, not exactly” you express, “I’m actually out here because of a bet with my sister.  She didn’t think I’d be able to last Black Friday shopping because of my anxiety towards crowds.”

“Wow, you braved these crowds for a bet?  I hope there is something worth it in the end” he barked out a laugh.

You gave him a huge grin “oh there is, otherwise I wouldn’t be out here.  I’m a photographer and she said she would buy me accessories.  I couldn’t back down from that!”

“Do you want company tonight?”

You completely taken aback. Why would he offer such a thing? Surely he had plans, and you didn’t want to bother him.

“Oh, no you don’t have to do that.  I don’t want to keep you from your plans.  Thank you though.”

He gave you that boy next store smile that you always loved when you saw him in pictures.  “I actually don’t have any plans.  I actually don’t really know why I came out tonight.  I’d just rather you not be alone if you had an anxiety attack.  At least I could help you if you had another one.”

You had to admit, just sitting here next to him and talking to him made you feel safe.  You didn’t even notice the crowds of people walking all around you; if was as if everything disappeared.  

“Umm, well, I guess if you have nothing better to do” you replied bashfully.

“Alright then, let’s get to it!”

The two of you walked around the rest of the night, his hand tightly in yours to keep you grounded. You didn’t mind one bit, this was Chris Evans you were talking to!  He wanted to hear all about your job and you happily did so.  You described to him the few cameras you owned, and also told him about the camera you had wanted to get.  It was the best camera out there, but it was just too expensive.  The two of you even walked by a camera store and you pointed out that you were planning on coming back here tomorrow afternoon so your sister could pay off her debt.  He seemed to really enjoy hearing about your work, and it made you smile.

The two of you talked about growing up in Massachusetts and where your favorite places were.  Chris pointed out his favorite pub that he always comes to when he is in town visiting his family.  You mentioned to him that you now lived in Newport and you boasted about the beautiful waterfront views.  “I just might have to visit there” he stated after, which made you blush profusely.

You also told him about having to take pictures every hour, and Chris certainly helped you out with that. He would recommend stores to take pictures in front of, along with telling you to make goofy faces.  The night was coming to an end and you were kind of bummed.

He wrapped you in his arms, giving you a bear hug and you didn’t want to let go.  

“Thank you Chris, for keeping me company tonight.  I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“It was my pleasure Y/N. Thank you for letting me into your life for the night.  Maybe I’ll see you again sometime, wondering around Boston” he said giving you a big smile.

You two parted ways as you walked to your sisters’ car.  You waited there another ten minutes before your sister and mom showed up, bags in hands.

“I win” you gloat to your sister as she glares at you.

The next afternoon, you and your sister were on your way to the little camera store you pointed out to Chris.  You knew the exact accessories you were looking for and couldn’t wait for your sister to pay off her debt to you.  You didn’t win the bets very often, so you were in a pretty good mood today.  Your mind drifting to Chris, wishing there was another way to say thank you for keeping you company and keeping you safe.

You walked into the camera shop and immediately went to the glass case, looking for the dream camera you wanted, but didn’t see it there.  

“Excuse me, but are you Y/N?” the salesperson asks.  

“Yes” you state confused.

“You have a gift here for you” the clerk said as they went in back to grab the gift.  They placed it on the counter and walked away to greet another customer.  You looked around and noticed your sister was standing along the wall, phone in her hand, oblivious as to what was going around.  

You grabbed the letter on top of the box and opened it.

Y/N,

Thank you for last night.  I really didn’t know what made me want to go to downtown Boston during Black Friday, but I’m glad I did.  I got to meet you.  I want you to know that I had a great time simply wandering around and talking.  I could see it in your eyes the love you have for your job, so I wanted to give you something.  Think of it as a Thank You gift, and an early Christmas gift.  I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.  XOXO Chris

Your arms were trembling slightly while you opened the box.  You let out a gasp at what you saw; the dream camera that you’ve always wanted, but was too expensive to buy.  Chris must have really paid attention to everything you said last night, because this was the exact camera you wanted; every detail you explained.  

You felt a tear of happiness slide down your cheek as you examined your new camera.  You couldn’t wait to try it out.  You could only hope that you were lucky enough to run into Chris again in the future to say thank you for such a generous gift.  

#Chris Evans x Reader #Chris Evans Fanfic #chris evans one shot #Chris Evans imagine #Chris evans #marvel #captain america

[stillsolo]

for the first in a while, I'm gonna ... try to take it easy, today.  

I actually have a lot to do but I really need to chill the fuck out for a second and take a breather.  my OCD's made my life remarkably difficult lately and I've begun to disassociate in order to cope.  I know disassociation plays a key role in obsessive-compulsive disorders; I know my OCD's fairly severe and it's been getting worse as I get older, but I'm not...usually this bad.  Even when under stress.

for example, a batch of 200 commissioned banner icons suddenly turns into 400+, and I'm still not done because I can't stop keep remaking them.  

oh, this one's coloring is off. but these frames are split second to each other ... can't have that, gotta redo 'em. 

 wait, the pixels are...'weird' looking in the corner, here.  rejected.

this one could've been cropped way better.  how could I expect them to use this?

why is this one in the 'final version' folder when the border around it overlapped a part of the icon?

I need to redo these 73 because the shadow is too dark and blocky beneath the icon.  it’s supposed to be a fade.  it’s what they ordered and you’re not giving them what they asked for. 

someone's paying you for this shit get it TOGETHER

yesterday, my OCD got triggered about 3 times?  I have a couple of forms.  I had a breakdown in front of my mother after she came home and asked me if I ate and I know I must've made some kinda stupid face that gave it away because seconds after she'd asked, I realized I didn't know what the hell ate other than the toast she'd watched me eat before she left for work at 9am.  It was 11pm when she asked.  

I also had mini-breakdown while talking to my customer and it was terribly embarrassing.  I got a nosebleed to top it all off too lmao  ( i'm so sorry if you're reading this, john omfg you've been the best to me and I'm sorry because I'm sure all you'd wanted was icons to rp sdfkjsd )

but I just. 

All of my friends think OCD is just me having high ass standards or just being 'know-it-all'.  I've been called that all my life.  In fact, I've been called that by friends I thought would never say anything like that about me because I thought we were friends

We live in this new age of 'awkward is cute'.   It's hip to be square, cool to be uncool, and sexy to be nerdy and quirky.  and there isn’t any better way to declare your individuality and weirdness than branding yourself 'so OCD' about something.  

Ahaha.

I fucking loathe people who do this.

OCD isn't a quirk or a set of tendencies.  It's not fucking buzzf.eed list, not a little buzzf.eed quiz you can take and readily relate to the results; it's an incapacitating, isolating disease that makes you afraid of your own mind.

If my friends could see, just once, what it's like for me, when I'm caught in an obsessive-compulsive loop, maybe then they'd finally understand me when I say ''''it's bad''''.

Even Something as simple as drawing a line-art from a sketch turns into a complete and total nightmare.  8/10 times, I'll redraw the line-art like — hm, I don' dunno — about 7 fuckin' times in a row, then, delete all of it because IDK, it wasn't 'right'?  ( Who am i kidding; I do the same with sketches ヽ(・ω・)ﾉ  )

Oh, yeah, for sure.  Me and my ‘high fucking standards' did this.

NO.  No one in their right mind would do this.  They wouldn’t re-draw the same fucking drawing 7 times in a row and the same layer style over and over, not even changing things up to maybe get some progress.      Nobody.  Jfc.

And oh, god, that moment when you realize, it's been more than 8/9 hrs since you began and you haven't eaten or drank anything; you don't remember the last time you looked at your phone or what the hell happened to the time because last time you looked, it was 11am and now it’s 9:48pm.

Moreover, you made exactly zero progress on your project — because IDK — there’s no valid reason?  JUST COULDN'T STOP HA

I never thought I would talk about this, but uh, Y'all know how much I love han.  I want Han to be seen in the best light possible.  while SW has been one of the few things that have held a light in my life, he's helped me become a better person in more ways than I can articulate.  and no, I don't mean I suddenly started picking trash up off the highways.

I mean, by writing him in this amazing place filled with people I don’t have IRL who share my interests, I’ve met so many new people, friends, learned so many lessons, about characters and life and writing.  

When I began writing Han, here, I had just learned what present and past tense was in English.  I was winging my writing, trying really hard to understand.  English isn't my first language.  In Cantonese, my native language, there's no such thing as a past tense.  

By writing Han with you guys, I've taken huge steps in life, without even realizing it. 

So, everything I do for han, I want for it to be good.  

Not outstanding, and definitely not exemplary or nonpareil — just ... good. 

And icons — haha.  I love icons.  I love and hate making them.  similar to my writing, I work very hard on his icons.  ... but I need to learn where to draw the line.  

I once remade an icon 23 times before I was happy with it.  ( i had 23 versions left in my folder lmao ).  like these here?  10 versions of each, in the least. 

( the last one is kinda an exception... I think.  I made that one well over 25 times, for sure.  but I think it's because I'm not accustomed to Blaine's coloring yet. ) 

Wow, this really turned into a long post.  I don't really care, though.  My OCD is something that has always been completely ignored IRL.  Shit, it's ignored by even my online friends.  I can't even game online without one of them thinking I must get off on establishing my superiority and overall knowledge of '???’ game.  Haha.

'Show me your build?' :D 'Er...nah. I think I'll pass.' 'Why?  What's the matter?' 'You'll pick it apart.'

It's never considered 'advice' when it's from me.  It's me as a know-it-all, as someone who looks down on others for not having up-to-par stats. 

I'm sorry I did the math for you so you wouldn't have to.  This is simply advice you're free to toss aside, but it's not like it matters.  Even if I reassured that—you're already too annoyed to listen for any longer.

So, I’ll also apologize for how I can recall faction modifiers, body part modifiers, critical hit and stealth modifiers, as well as debuffs; how a certain amount of damage of one type turns into inflicted damage to a target while considering type modifiers and armor, and knowing the damage formulas needed to calculate the number of hit points required to kill an armored or unarmored target, with or without a finisher multiplier figured in — because I want you to do the very best with your weapon of choice, even though I can name 5 different weapons that utterly outclass it by tenfold. 

In reality, I never had much of choice.  Information like that doesn't stop looping in my mind, even at night, when all I want is to sleep.

Sometimes ... I wish I could be that one character on a comedy show who has a quirky disorder or ''OCD'' and everyone seems to love him for it because he's funny when he does it or he's generally helpful 

More often than not, my OCD just ruins everything.  I don't feel like I belong anywhere.

I need to take a breather.

#˒・*。◞ ( ooc ) *･ﾟ✧ ⎸ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ᴄᴀʀʙᴏɴɪᴛᴇ. #;; — rp woes #;; — general venting #;; — ocd cw #( . trying to be positive but it might've come off negative? okay tldr; i wanna take it easy. i even slept in (kinda) today. #( . im sorry for all the new people seeing me complain lmao i promise i'm usually an active han #( . i just need to finish my commissions first

[tamiddyinyourcity]

2:57pm.

Nigga.

Friday, February 28th of 2020.

What the fuck is the deal?

Shit thats pissed me off today:

The people who were supposed to arrive between 9 to 11am came at like 8am..... my eyes were barely open wtf

I got charged an extra 39 dollars for my laundry. I'm pissed. Nothing I can do about it, but be mad until I forget.

It's Friday, also known as "the day my ex hangs with his friends, including that bitch i dont like, and inevitably drink alcohol and he enjoys his life without me" day. It kinda ruins Fridays, not gonna lie. Since my Fridays are basically that sonic meme, where everyone else I know has a party, or is out getting railed by their loved ones, meanwhile i just get extremely depressed and sleep until i go to work by 3 the next day.

Fridays are basically my Sundays. :)

I may or may not be irritated and wishing I had more wine. Alcoholism was a fun coping mechanism the last two times. Why not one more time? Why not just keep drinking?

I didn't eat today.

I spent the entire day masturbating. From 8:30am to like.... 30 minutes ago. It's 3:11pm. Nothing says "a healthy recovering girl" like me whacking it to my ex and sleeping for entire weeks straight. :)

I feel like shit.

I am extremely sweaty and overheated.

I am tired.

Gonna force myself out tonight. A party, to go get more wine, buy new earbuds, like.... something.

And I considered writing my ex a final letter. What's to lose?

Pros:

Final thoughts said

Can leave it at that

Feeling slightly heard

Cons:

He wants to forget my existence

And idk im getting better at my coping mechanism of just daydreaming that we resolved things and writing enough vent posts to both distance from him and not have any lasting memories with him either

Idk man