#im butchering it someone please know what im talking about

[forbidd3n-w1re]

Letting the walls down - Billy Butcher x Reader

hey-ho! i've had this idea for a while and had to pour it out, enjoy! 

 originally this was supposed to be a butcher x reader but while writing it i put in a tiny bit of hughie x reader, i mean you can see it if you squint lol-

 summary : you and butcher have been somewhat okay friends for a while, and even though he doesn't want to acknowledge it, he cant push everyone away.

 warnings : so much angst (i feed off of it.) nightmares, beating up, billy actually being nice to someone(you lol), billy also attacking hughie, scars, panic attack, flashbacks, heavy alcohol use, passing out, venting, traumatic past, mention of shootings, "cunt"'s (tell me if i forgot something please!)

 if any of these trigger you, please dont read this fanfic!

commission : nope!

 word count : ≈2800 words

 genre : angst, hurt/comfort (someone's gotta do it, right?)

(im so sorry this is so long i went wild with this one)

 //////~~`×`~~//////

Butcher wasn't a talkative type when it comes to his past. In fact, he never let anyone come close enough to him to know him very well. In the team, he was just the leader, the one that organized the plan and the strategy, the one that went head-first into danger.

You? You we're the one that held the team like a magnet.

When Hughie first joined, Butcher looked like he'd screw his head off if he made one wrong step. Every single time Butcher offended him and told him he was a cunt, you'd fight back for him. You knew that Hughie had it in him, he knew how to be defensive, but at that time it was risky to talk back to Butcher due to the fact how much Billy hated him. It happened a lot. It was like you were Butcher's tranquilizer.

Hughie appreciated everytime you stood on his side, even after every glare Billy made to you. Billy knew the death glare would work on Hughie because he looked like he shat his pants, but you? You did not twitch at all. No shiver. Nothing. You couldn't even bother to look back at him.

Sooner or later, Butcher's "cunt"'s and "wimp"'s that were addressed to Hughie weren't that frequent anymore. Sure, Butcher without using the word cunt at least once in a day was nonexistent, but they weren't said to Hughie anymore.

Until one day they had a pretty big fight about the new member, Annie, AKA Starlight. Butcher, the no.1 Supe hater immediately started swearing at Hughie for bringing her to the hideout. After some time, Annie left, and then the shit hit the fan.

"Oi, kid. Who the fuck do you think you are, bringin' over here some random chick? Who is, apparently, a fuckin' Supe?" Butcher started yelling at the guy, pushing him around.

"Listen, I-I know it wasn't a good idea, but please, hear me out--"

Butcher grabbed Hughie by the collar, slamming him against a pillar hardly, and the smaller figure of Hughie's let out a loud grunt.

"Shut yer' fuckin' trap right the fuck now. Do yer' understand in what danger we could be if she had a mic?" Butcher held his collar more tightly now, looking at him like he might just chop off his head at that moment. "No, you don't, Hughie. You know why? 'Cause you're nothing but a trashy, shitty li'l cunt who had managed to grab a single bit of luck to join my little team. If you continue being a little pussy, I swear on my mother that i will-"

Sensing that the fight seriously escalated, and totally not because Hughie had started to breathe more shallowly because of how hardly his chest was pressed against the pillar, you stood off the couch, grabbed a foldable plastic chair and pushed Butcher as far away from Hughie as you could.

Butcher not detecting the sudden attack had a much more violent tone in his voice now. He wanted a fair fight.

"Oi, the fuck do you think you're doin', li'l shit?" Not bothering to deal with Butcher's bickering, you focused on helping Hughie not fall down as he heaped for gasps of air.

"Hey, Hughie, focus. Focus on your breathing, alright?" You got the comment from other members of the team that you and Billy actually had a lot in common, but the calmness of your voice was something Billy could never achieve probably. Hughie looked at you, his look revealing how many apologies he wanted to tell you for making this now your problem, but you only gave him a hopeful nod and a smile. "Go take a seat on the couch. I have an inhalator in one of my jackets if you need it, alright hun?" Hughie only let out a quiet agreement, following your orders.

Butcher, on the other hand, his eye twitched a little when hearing the nickname you gave Hughie. He knew that the nicknames you gave to the team were all in platonic meanings, but he still felt that little twinge in his heart when he knew the silly nicknames weren't for him.

You followed up now to Butcher, staring up at him. He reeked of alcohol, probably from last night, and cigarettes. He tried to hold up a pissed face to you, but you knew he couldn't do it. Everyone has their secrets, Butcher's was his past, and the fact that everytime you looked badass, he loved it.

"Stay the fuck away from him, or I will pluck out your little so-called "bollocks", one by one, painfully." There was your angry tone, along with a bit of mocking his british dialect. Others were right, you guys did have a lot in common. Billy only smirked at your threat. Billy pushed past you, grabbing his jacket, and stated something that made you chuckle. "Im going out for a drink, try to stay out of the little wimp's underwear while I'm gone."

Hughie and you were alone in the hideout now. Annie left, M.M. was in a visit to his daughter, and Frenchie and Kimiko went on a date.

Approaching the curly haired figure, you heard his small coughing fits. Surely Butcher didn't hurt him that badly, right?

"Hughie? Hun, you alright?" Putting your hand on his shoulder from behind, you jumped over next to him. Hughie brought his head up, only this time he wasn't startled.

"Yeah, I'm alright. Thank you for everything that you've done, really. Especially back there, not everyone has the guts to practically throw Butcher away with a chair." He gave you a small smile.

"No problem. Besides, he shouldn't act like that towards anyone. And Annie was really sweet too-"

Hughie stopped you, quickly apologizing, but immediately continuing.

"No, no, I understand him. I shouldn't have done that, besides he isn't a big fan of Supes, and Annie might've had a mic but I know she wouldn't. We can't be careful enough, if they find us we're practically doomed." Hughie was now on Butcher's side at this point.

"But, you know… He does have a weak spot for you." Hughie gave you a smirk, knowing that if you had water in your mouth you'd probably spit it out after hearing this.

"Pardon?" You looked at him with wide eyes, not believing a single word the curly haired boy just said.

"Back there, when you threatened him. I know that he has this façade of his where he pretends like he's the strongest man alive, but he gave you a smile upon hearing you. I think he even liked the fact that you weren't scared to stand up to him."

You got up from the couch, looking at Hughie with the biggest shock. "What the hell do you mean?"

Hughie just smirked, "You should go check up on him. See how he's doing. I think you're the only one of us that might get closer to him. Don't tell him I sent you there though, please." Nodding in agreement, you grabbed one of your oversized leather jackets and went to the door. Soon, Hughie stopped you.

"Oh, and Y/N? Thank you."

"No problem, hun." And you headed out to find your stupid ass loverboy.

//////~~`×`~~//////

Heading into the bar, you looked at the clock that was placed next to the cups. The clock showed half past 11, and your view fell onto the slouched, buff figure that was Billy. Walking up to him, you tapped flicked his head lightly as a sign for him to wake up.

"Oiiii, yer lil cuntttt…" He sounded wasted more than he ever was. He used to drink a lot on work, one time he even wanted to dance with M.M., but the 17 glasses of whisky gave you a very bad impression on how he felt right now.

"Hi to you too, cunt ass." You lightly shook him with a small curl of your lips on your face showing.

"The fock do ya want, kid? Can't you see a man tryin' to enjoy himself?" His british accent came out even more unclear when he was intoxicated, which would be funny if he wasn't laying down on the table, alone in the pub. "Go get me another round, be useful for once, N/N." That was a new one, you never heard anyone from the team use a nickname on you.

"Absolutely not. Butcher, c'mon, get up, we're leaving." You tried to give him a hand, but he wouldn't budge.

"Where the hell we goin'?" He groggily asked.

"Im driving you to my home since I don't know your adress.Now Butch, please, cooperate."

Agreeing for once, he put his arm around your shoulders and hung onto you as he struggled to walk.

Walking to your car, you felt like you were walking sideways the whole time, probably because he was much bigger than you. "Lean onto the car, Butch, okay? I have to get my keys, then I'll help you get in the car." You felt the need to give him instructions and steps for everything, because after seeing him passed out on that table circled with whiskey shots, you felt more safe if you did that. Listening to your idea, he leaned on, and you quickly unlocked the car and opened his door. "Alright, hun, let's get you in." Your arm sneaked around his torso, guiding him to sit down into the passenger seat. He smiled lightly at the nickname. Buckling him up, you closed the door lightly and went into your seat, turning on the car and driving away.

//////~~`×`~~//////

Driving around the city, you realized Butcher was quietly snoring. Probably the most peaceful you've ever seen him.

Parking into your backyard garrage, you got out of your car and went to Billy's side, unbuckling him. "Hey, hun, wake up." You lightly gave him a slap on his right cheek, figuring it was a better idea than pouring a bucket of ice on him. Unfortunately, he was not a light sleeper. Giving up, you put your arms around him once more and somehow getting him out of the car, making him lean onto the vehicle for a moment while you locked it.

Swinging your arm once again, you went into your house and layed him down on the couch. By now, it was way past midnight and you came to the conclusion that he wont be waking up until the morning. You went into your bedroom, taking off your work clothes and dressing up into your pj's. Grabbing your phone for a sec to text Hughie that Butcher is in an okay condition, unfortunately you were stopped by Butcher's grunts from the living room.

Getting up and sighing, you realized how much your eyes were close to closing themselves and going off to sleep, how much your arms felt like you had a fist fight with someone and how much your legs burned, including your back that was almost folded in half by Butcher's weight while you carried him. You were tired, but you needed to keep the team in top shape. After all, you were their magnet, which also meant that you should be there for everyone, even Butcher. Even Butcher, who behaved like a bag of shit towards everyone. Knocking on the door side, you stepped in the living room, the floors creaking.

"Butcher, is everything alright?"

Your eyes headed towards his sleeping figure, but he didn't look like he was enjoying his resting time as he kept shivering and thrashing in several points of the night. You got the blanket at the table next to you, slowly putting it over him. The blanket used to provide you heat, but also comfort and a safe space. Maybe it would also work for him. Hopefully.

You wanted to bet that if Frenchie and M.M. were in the room with you right now, they'd probably take a bunch of pictures to make fun of you both. Thankfully, they weren't here, and you thought that Butcher might sometimes lack of rest. Climbing onto the couch, you lightly rose his head up and sat down, putting his head onto your lap and ruffling his hair. He was taller, so you didn't get a lot of opportunities to ruffle his hair at all. You didn't even know you wanted to do that, but you did either way.

Although he was a heavy sleeper, apparently he realized what you were doing. Still woozy from the alcohol and driving around, he barely recognized the place he was in when he woke up, but what he did see was your face. Along with the blanket that you gave him. Snuggling a bit closer to you, he pulled the blanket up closer to you so that you don't feel left out and he mumbled something.

"Didn't hear you, love… Mind trying to repeat it?" You spoke, removing a bit of his hair from his forehead, feeling that he was sweating a bit.

"Hnnnnhhh….y'know 'm nun' like 'im…" His drowsy voice was back, and even though you loved how calm he sounded, you started to get a bit worried. You didn't know the real reason why he was so uptight with everyone, not letting his guard down.

"Like who, love?"

"My fatherrrr…" You don't know his past. You shouldn't jump to conclusions. You only knew that he didn't like his father because Hughie told you that once when you went out for a coffee.

You face was forming a very sad look, trying to keep yourself at bay and not let a few tears drop down to his head. You have to stay strong for everyone. For you. For him.

"No… No, Billy, you're not. You will never be like him. You're better, darling, you know that yourself already." Stay strong. Keep yourself at bay.

"Yeh…yeh…y'know, those scars on my back, the ones you saw during the fight in Russia when you treated my wounds…" His voice didn't sound confused by the alcohol anymore, rather just sad, guilty and ashamed.

"Yeah, what about them love?"

"He did that to me. With a belt. Like I was a fuckin' animal. I tried to save him, Y/N, I-I really did." He was sniffling. If you weren't having the table lamp turned on, you'd think he has a pollen allergy.

This is where your façade started breaking down.

"Who, hun? Who did you try to save?"

"Lenny, my brother. He…" Butcher stopped, looking like he's having an internal fight with himself whether he should continue, because he's showing his vunerable side now. "He shot himself. Because of me." Tears started sliding down his cheeks, silent ones that have shown how much he has been through. How much he has been keeping the truth in for himself. How long he kept it from the public, knowing that if he was left alone his whole life he'd probably rot. The tears showed how much he hated himself for his actions, for leaving his younger brother unprotected, for not standing up to his father more often (even though he tried his best), how much he missed Becca, how much he regretted for leaving Ryan with Homelander, how much he hates looking vunerable. You, though? You didn't question any of his actions. You simply brushed away his tears and gave him a peck in his hair.

"I'm so sorry, love. I'm sorry that happened. Some things just make us stronger, but you were a child back then, you didn't deserve any of this. You didn't deserve to be treated like trash from your father. You didn't deserve Homelander suddenly flying fuck knows where with Ryan. Darling,"

You started, wiping another tear and smiling at him softly. He loved seeing your smile, whether it was a feisty one or a caring one, a silly one or a tired one. It made him feel… loved. "I believe in you. You are literally the strongest person I know. Not a monster. Not a killing machine. Not nothing. You are a person, just like the rest of us."

He sat back up from his sleeping position, only to lay his head down onto your shoulder. You've never seen him this affectionate, nobody probably ever has besides Becca. She was a nice woman, you remember Butcher showing pictures of her sometimes, it's a shame she had to die like that.

"Hey, Y/N." He looked at you.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for being a kind cunt."

"Back with your cuntiness, i see…" you chuckled, and he only closed his eyes again, deciding to fall into the slumber of sleep once again.

"Love ya', Y/N."

You swore you felt heat rise to your cheeks, hell if your blood wasn't all the way into your brain like you were hanging off of something.

"…Love you too, Billy."

His beard tickled the everloving shit of you, but you didn't have the guts to wake him up again. Not while he's getting something he hasn't had for a while, rest. Before joining him in the nap, you swung your arm across his shoulders, pulling him in closer. He seemed to like the action, scooting a bit closer to you.

 //////~~`×`~~//////

AAAA i hope you liked the fic!! i usually dont write a lot, but since the fandom needs more x reader fanfics (esp angst because im so good at it, haha slay), i've came in clutch! B)

 till next time!!

#the boys #the boys angst #billy butcher #billy butcher x reader #billy butcher angst #william butcher #william butcher x reader #hughie campbell #the boys butcher #the boys hughie #the boys x reader #the boys amazon #angst #hurt/comfort #x reader #x reader fanfic #fanfic #fanfiction #the boys fanfic #the boys fanfiction #god help me #okay ouch

[restlesschilled]

TMagP 010 reaction

Note: I am a backer, so this was originally written on March 12, and posted on March 14

without further ado

LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO

TITLE

is this a Saturday night live situation of more of a Saturday night fever

DEDICATION

ah the good old talking about the magnus archives to people who dont listen and sounding insane... absolute mood

IM SO FUCKING EXCITED

CASE

BONZO

BONZO BONZO BONZO

nigels sos

Mr.Six sounds like a fun bit EXCEPT IN THE CONTEXT OF THIS SHOW

Berried/buried

the laugh track is so unnerving

this is horrifying

IM SORRY HE BROKE HIS ARM???

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS HAZING RITUAL

TORMENTORS IN THE DUNGEON

the music

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

THE BONZO BUTCHER

BONZO SKIN SUIT????

IM SHAKING

"in the edgier parts of the internet" Gwen lol

3 murders

POST CASE

colin

dont hurt celia

celia call lena

hes not suppose to be there

ALICE AND SAM DOING A THING IN A PLACE

raining... lovely and ominous

"its saturday night and im choosing to hang out in a hole with you"

"a wet hole and not the good kind either" ALICE MY LOVE

key

GWEN

HERE WE GO

gwen please be safe

WHATY

WHAT

GWEN

BONZO

GWEN

BABY GIRL

OMG HES COMMITING THE MURDERS

FOR THE OIAR

GWEN MY POOR BABY

GET OUT OF HIS HOUSE

CUT BACK TO SAM AND ALICE

samama "noodle arms" khalid

"little baby shrimp sam routine"

"well we tried come on"

ARE YOU TELLING ME IT WAS MUFFLED CAUSE IT WAS BEHIND THE DOOR

someones office i guess

ARCHIE

"archipelago"... sam

SHE SAID IT

SHE SAID THE THING

"ARCHITECT.... ARCHIVE"

WORMTRACKS

SYMBOLS OF ANCIENT OTHERWORLDLY POWER

ALICE

SHE HAS TO KNOW... AT LEAST SUBLIMINALLY

SOMEWHERE IN HER MIND SHE KNOW

"theres my baby shrimp"

THE PINNING

BANG

DOOR

OH NOOO

OHHHHHH NOOOO

I THINK WE FOUND RED CANARY

OR JONAH

OR THE ARCHIVIST

CREDITS

Beth Eyre Played [ERROR]

Mr Bonzo was uncredited

#Alice and Sam go to a place and do a thing #the magnus protocol spoilers #the magnus protocol #mr bonzo #gwendolyn bouchard #gwen bouchard #samama khalid #sam khalid #alice dyer #celia ripley #colin becher #the magnus institute

[aro-geo-turtle]

Malevolent Part 40

ahhhh im so hyped. ok lets do this. oh this is going to be so long

plans going pretty well so far, the masks all being unique probably isn't great if someone figures out that arthur and noel aren't the people who are meant to have those masks

arthur showing off his genius smart brain! go arthur! and noel gets to be a little clever too i suppose

you're putting in "getting to know oscar" as a whole??? thats way too big! what if you completely forget he exists?! ohhhh and it makes john realize just how much oscar means to arthur :((((((

damn this is a really big organization. and this leader guy really sucks. why is his voice so annoying? I don't know what i expected but of course this organization is fully of generally shitty people

new leader is definitely larson. yep.

YELLOW!!!! :DDDDD MY GUY! Murder that random shithead who i almost thought was oscar for a split second! you can act as high and mighty as you please, i know what you're really like

at least channeling yellow wears larson out, that's a weakness

i really don't want to know where larson intends to take the order

Arthur, John doesn't want to kill Yellow! that's another version of him!

"I wonder who is playing who?" larson's almost certainly playing yellow

John :(((((( come one buddy

omg is yellow stealing john's memories?????? uh oh. that's...bad.

"a large bizarre looking object" very helpful John. Automobile sized??? damn that is big. fucked up space machine???

uh guys? have you forgotten that the vizser can HEAR john??? Ok direct confrontation. let's hope this goes well.

OH NO. he's about to reveal john's identity to noel oh shit.

oh boy super smart brain helmet. ok. elder? ...and they serve the great old ones. ohhhh they're going to release yellow. hmm. but does this mean that this could give john his own body?!?!??

...dying? is...that happening to arthur and john? oh no.

actually that's a good point, they might be able to get the cult members on their side.

oh no reckoning time. ok i can't decide if they've been saved or doomed.

larson being awful awful larson as usual. oh hi butcher. fancy seeing you here.

...why do he want to separate John and arthur?...maybe Yellow would absorb the rest of john

mutual friend??? Larson you never fucking met him.

ahhhh repeating the words from part 12. fuck.

can't delay him finding out any longer. echoing part 12 once again.

oh ok, multiple fallen stars, this group has the gray one, so the black one is probably another one somewhere else. so the grey one is an artifact of the Beholding then.

"...or it can show you where you left your keys." PFFFFFFF

"allow" them to return to the dreamlands, please. we know you have no intentions of letting that power go. yeah me and john on the exact same wavelength

arthur you're kinda the last person who Yellow would be convinced by.

"a pet" OH DAMN! YEAH YELLOW COME OUT HERE AND SPEAK YOUR PIECE. arthur buddy if you want to get him on your side, insults are not the way to do this.

poor noel has about 10% of the context to understand what is happening right now.

the truth is that arthur's sorry. come on arthur say it say you're sorry. come on. YESSSSS yep that it that's it arthur! he actually did it he actually apologized :,)

come on noel come in clutch. ive been pretty sus of you but if you can save us now. aw damn noel taking this leages better than i expected but he's also absolutely about to sacrifice himself, this is a death speech for sure

noel im sorry but this is not the king who tortured you. he has no clue who you are

WHAT. Butcher???? OMG twist of the century!!! what the fuck! no way! fuck yeha!

"Till the end" yepppp

arthur it really really might kill john tho. you don't know how this works, john's the one feeling it.

shut the fuck up larson. and this fight is bringing back some s3 arthur energy oh boy

oh no john oh no john he's lost again. no no no no his name!

noel... is this it?

omg john projected!!!!!! john projected!!!! they're fighting!!!!! they can talk face to face oh my gosh he sounds so cool.

yellow baby :(((((

the undefeated :,)))))))))

...and there it is. goodbye noel. rest in peace

you have to let this thing with larson go arthur. its the only way to forgive yourself.

one part of me is saying that if they leave larson alone to get the stone he's going to do something bad, but the other part is saying arthurs needs to leave larson be for character development

now time to see if my theory about why john cares about the stone is correct. i think i am. he's desperate to get it. i have a bad feeling about this. touch it???? that seems bad.

arthur? did kayne freeze time again? yep. yep yep yep. did they run out a time limit?

oh interesting. ha john's grown beyond his beginnings! yes! he can't fit anymore! ohhhhh shit. he sent him back to the dark world????? oh shit.

choices choices choices. it all comes back to choices.

i don't trust how happily ever after Kayne is making this sound.

john you've got to tell him right away. you can't put it off. he'll be mad but you'll get past it like you always do.

ohhhhhhhhh. oh boy. damn Kayne. i mean arthur you obviously knew he was hiding something, i he wasn't at all subtle about it. this is honestly probably better than the alternative of John trying to get up the courage to confess for ages.

pointing a gun at Kayne is a terrible idea. OH GOSH. welp. ok then.

excuse me are we getting kayne lore???? the crawling chaos? a spawn of Azathoth? Damn i don't know how to spell that but people called it???

ok apparently i can agree with Kayne on one thing and that is that larson sucks. and i can agree with larson on one thing and that is that i do not get what kayne's saying either.

ok than blind him! go for it! yellow and larson trip to the dreamlands? What did he do to noel? "Maybe Spain"????

yep a test, of course. uh oh. what is this?

damn. I have no idea what this means. where are they going? what will next season bring?

#malevolent liveblog #malevolent #malevolent part 40 #malevolent spoilers

[unknownteapot]

can someone help me with a meme/joke reference please i cant figure it out you know the one that's like?? like one of them's with a ? and the other with a . and it's like 'hotel? california.' but its not those words i'm sorry i know im butchering it but please does anyone know what i'm talking about english is not my first language and words are confusing

#smoshblr #please help #meme

[imaginesbymonika]

It all tastes like poison.

Part 3.

previous chapter

Pairing: Homelander x fem!reader / Solider Boy x fem!reader

Plot: based on this request: “can you please write an imagine about someone who use to be with soldier boy before he "died» which left her broken, but she still worked with vought for years because she ages slower than normal and she meets homelander who she kinda falls for, but when ben comes back she gets mixed emotions till he tries to kill homelander and then she'll have to work with everyone else to get him back into the box, which she doesn't want to do. LIKE ANGST?”

warning: f-bombs, mentions of death and murder, not completly sure what im doing with this request but we'll see

“What the fuck was that?”, Hughie sits up straight and quickly tosses his blanket to the side, making the couch underneath him squick at the sudden movement. He reaches for his phone. It’s almost 4 in the morning:” Was that an earthquake? Fuck.”, he glances over to his friend, who is already holding a gun in his hands.

“Sounded more like as if some meteorite slammed right into our parking lot.”, Billy declares while he makes his way toward the front door of their shared motel room.

From outside he can hear footsteps. He puts his index finger in front of his mouth before slowly pulling the red curtains to the side. Billy squints just eyes before letting out an aggravated groan. He lowers his weapon and quickly unlocks the door:” Oi! You’ve probably woken up the entire fucking neighborhood.”

Y/N simply rolls her eyes at his remark:”I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t urgent. I need to talk to you.” The man in front of her, who is leaning against the doorframe scans her features before taking a slight step to the side, he lets her walk into the room before closing the door.

“Tell me one good reason, why I should talk to someone who is riding Homelander’s dick.”

“I am not fucking him!”, the Supe hisses but clears her throat once she catches sight of Hughie in the corner of the room:” Or at least not anymore. I honestly don’t know why I should talk about my sex life with you-.”

“Why are you here?”, Billy cuts her off while turning on the small table light next to his bed. He sits down and places his gun in his lap. His hand makes a brief gesture:” I highly doubt that you came over for a cup of tea, love.”

“Well, I figured, that you have already heard the news about Soldier Boy.”, the woman explains, and a melancholy expression covers her face. Hughie slides to the left, to let Y/N sit down next to him on the couch. He swallows thickly.

“Soldier Boy, huh.”, Billy echoes her words and scratches his chin:” Why the fuck would I know anything about that?” Y/N only sneers at that and shakes her head:” Come on, Butcher. Do you really think I’m stupid? You know everything about everyone. You’re obsessed… and let’s be honest, if there is even a small chance to take down Homelander you are the first one to go after it.”

She pauses and tilts her head while trying her best to conceal the sadness that lingers in her gaze:” And I am fully aware of the fact that Soldier Boy is the biggest one you’ll ever get.”

For a few seconds Billy only stares at her, before he exchanges a knowing look with Hughie:" Go and get him."

Homelander looks out of the window, while his one nostril twitches every now and then. The footage of the security camera, the one in which his so-called 'girlfriend' killed Black Noir plays over and over and over again in the background.

"Why would she do this?", the Deep asks and glances over at Ashley. The poor woman twists her red hair until yanking out a few pieces. "This is bad.", she whispers and Homelander finally turns around. "Well, isn't it obvious?", he asks and puts his hands on his hips:" She's going after Soldier Boy. Y/N is probably still…", he pauses while an incredible amount of anger forms itself in the pit of his stomach:" Still in love with him."

#angst #x reader #imagine #soldier boy x y/n #soldier boy x reader #soldier boy #homelander #homelander x reader #the boys imagine #the boys x reader #billy butcher #hughie campbell #soldier boy fic #the boys s3

[arthurtaylorlester]

malevolent ep 29 liveblog !!

(spoilers obviously)

are we underwater??

who's speaking i cant tell???

i feel like this is john @kayne but it could very well be yellow and larson

oh wait is this past dialogue?

i genuinely cant remember

oh okay its arthur remembering

"its just water" THEYRE BACK AND THEYRE BICKERING !!!

with silly music in the bg

oh exposition through john i always love it

oh they are so married

a donkey???????

this is so funny

arthur please stop groaning its...

THE FACE OF SOMEONE NOT TO FUCK WITH!!!

MUSTACHE?? harlan really just said yall wrong arthur has a mustache

john is a bitch wife comfimed/ j

A FILM????? JOHN WANTS TO SEE A FILM AND THATS WHY HES MAD !?!?!?

and john is soo petty he doesbt even want yo go to nyc

arthur having to temind john that theyre wanted

IS MALEVOLENT A COMEDY NOW???

john not tellibg arthur they were sitting next to someone the whole time

arthur spite-eating to piss of john >>>>

john are you having second thoughts??

BELLA LORE????

WE'RE MEETING DANIEL???

oh that was weird i bet its mr butcher

Oh wait violins is this mr butcher

whats the whispering in the bg

john stop describing im trying to hear the whispers

is this a kellin type?

oh he just needed to sneeze

diseased man get away from

"NOT OUR HANDKERCHIEF ARTHUR !!!"

malevolent is a comedy atp. thank you mr guthrie for this blessing of an episode

best season opener by far

"that's ... my arm, sir"

im not angry muttering i do it too lol

"hes using us as comfort? jesus christ" stfu john you did the same

wait isnt there a recession in the 1930s

OHHH THAT EXPLAINS THE READING EXCERPT

this train spunds dangerous

oh god oh fuck how is arthur going to read

arthur just what are you doing

is he just making up a story?

how he just talking about himself

QAIT IS THE FRIEND PARKER NOOOO

NO IF HES MEETING WITH PARKER HE DIED

or is this an elaborate way of telling the guy to fuck off

who sending a telegraph to 'will henley'

OH FUCK

ITS THE BUTCHER

the horror >:)

hes smiling oh this cant be good

this is really good and the sound design!!

they are so bad at communicating that they accidentally revealed their identity

WAIT WILL HENLEY IS AN ACTUAL PERSON??? ARTHUR WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

"beCAuse" IDK WHY THE WAY HE SAID THAT SO FUNNT

arthur is so smart it makes sense that the guy would try to corner him

YESS ARTHUR

I LIKE WHEN ARTHUR IS ALL CALCULATING AND SO DOES JOHN

so youre going to trap him in a train car

so arthur's escape plan is.... jump out of train. and break his legs. again.

oh snow will totally save you yeah sure

arthur just really likes playing dumb i think

now im on a train and i cant hear shit

john enjoys this?? john is excited My god he is so precioys

"You are my eyes" that had no reason to be so wholesome

"okay... youre overselling it" john critiquing arthurs acting im dead

10 more minutes will this end horribly?

I KNEW THEY WPULD BE ON THE TOP OF THE CARS

thats mad ahahhahah ... wait a damn minute

ITS MR BUTCHER

"why arent you looking at me" so he doesnt know the full extent of arthur madness

JOHN SOUNDS SO WORRIED

OH GOD THIS SO INTENSE

pov the tracks shave off his mustache

sorry this isnt the time for jokes

WHAT. HE FUCKING WHAT

HE TORE HIS CHEEK?? CALL THAT WILL GRAHAM CORE

wait imagine they become friends

it wpuld be real funny

john would be so pissed

oh god theyre going to jump off the train

THEYRE GETTIBG SIDETRACKED GODDAMNIT

okay so arthur is manipulating he is soo <33

MEMENTO MORI???

ny bbg is so good at stalling

NO ARTHUR DONT GET DISTRACTED THIS ISNT TGE TIME FOR SELF REFLECTIO

YES YOURE NOTHING LIKE HIM

HE DID IT!!

hes smiling again?

oh well he paid his respects

THAT WAS AN AMAZING EPISODE AND DAMN GOOD SEASON PREMIERE

i will be malevolent posting later today but alas i have other things to do other than screaming about fictional voices on tumblr

#malevolent #malevolent spoilers #malevolent podcast #arthur lester #john doe #john doe malevolent #arthur malevolent #malevolent arthur #john malevolent #malevolent john #unhinged aromantics #malevolent pt 29

[radiojamming]

AUGH FINE

---

The first time is memorable, to say the least.

He doesn’t tell Goncharov about it, because the last thing he wants is his boss to look at him like he’s grown a second head. Goncharov never questions Sascha’s methods, simply remarking in his usual way that as long as the job gets done, then there’s nothing to ask about.

Katya, on the other hand, laughs like a goddamn maniac.

“Bagpipes?” she wheezes. She has to set down her champagne glass, giggling too much to hold it. “How in the hell—“

He blushes despite himself, quickly stuffing his face with the tapenade she’s brought along. He talks with his mouth full, hoping she doesn’t make out what he’s saying, “If’htuck n’ifepick im f’pipef.”

“You stuck an ice pick in the pipes?” she repeats, perfectly clear. Her grin is catlike, pleased as if he’d dropped a mouse right in front of her. “They’re called drones, Sascha.”

He swallows down the tapenade, quickly taking a swig of water to wash away the saltiness lingering in his mouth. “It worked, at least,” he says at last.

Katya just grins and elegantly swoops up her champagne, eyes glittering in the dim lights. “I’m sure it did,” she replies.

---

Goncharov vetoes the wedding cake idea, but Sascha decides that if Goncharov doesn’t see it, he can’t complain about it.

Leo thinks it’s a good idea, and if Leo thinks so, then Sascha knows it’ll be fine. He even watches Sascha’s back as they slip into the executive kitchen, skirting around racks of shining copper pots and dodging baffling displays of desserts that Sascha couldn’t put a name to if he tried. The wedding cake is out of the way, tucked in a corner where someone can’t accidentally bump into it and ruin thousands of lira worth of pastry.

He chooses his favorite thin knife, a carving implement left over from his days in the butcher shop. With the exactitude of a surgeon, he slides it neatly underneath the frosting at the base of the cake, hiding the tip of the handle with a dollop of frosting. Then, he stands back and admires his work.

“Does it look good?”

Leo looks over his shoulder, surveying the cake top to bottom before his eyebrows go up. “Where is it?”

Sascha grins and pats Leo on the shoulder, leaving a smear of frosting.

And when Sascha saves Goncharov’s life by opening that bastard of a double-crosser’s throat with a carving knife covered in buttercream, he feels all the better for it.

---

“You can’t— Sascha, that is blasphemy!” Leo practically groans.

“It’s not,” Sascha retorts, shoving the sculpture of Jesus with one hand so it gives a hollow wooden thunk. “It’s just wood, Leo.”

“That’s Jesus Christ!”

He looks up at the beatific face of the lord and savior himself, and then shrugs. “Jesus is made of wood?”

“He’s not— Sascha, you can’t use a statue of Jesus to hide a gun. You’re going to—” Leo’s hands start moving at an incredible rate, apparently spelling out in gratuitous motion the sort of journey to hell that Sascha’s guaranteed to take for this act.

Sascha gives him a look. “I’ve killed people, Lyova.”

He doesn’t miss Leo blushing at the nickname. But Leo turns all the more red as he gets flustered. “Why can’t you hide it in one of the angel statues?”

“That’s better?”

“It’s not Christ!”

Sascha rolls his eyes, then walks by the statue of Jesus to one of an angel raising his hands to heaven. “Next time,” he says. “I’m picking a less devout partner.”

---

Once again, Goncharov gives him a negative.

To be fair, Sascha doesn’t know how he would have pulled off hiding the gun in the focaccia, but a knife is not a gun. And a knife can be baked into the base of a focaccia by a very clever baker.

Leo nearly loses his mind at the suggestion, tugging at his already wild hair until it’s a bird’s nest on one side.

But once again, it pays off in spades when Sascha expertly throws that same knife (now coated in olive oil for a very slippery throw) into Vercelli’s face. When he retrieves the knife, he waits until Goncharov’s turned away to wipe blood off his face before he sniffs the blade. Sure enough, Vercelli’s blood smells pleasantly herbal.

---

Sascha looks damn good in a dress. Just like he thought.

Katya fusses with the slit on the side, trying to find a way to make it lay just so.

“Your thighs are too big,” she complains, not for the first or last time. “I can’t find a single garter that fits.”

“Is that a compliment or an insult?”

Katya snorts in a decidedly inelegant way, then throws her hands in the air. “I give up,” she says. “Everyone’s going to see the holster.”

Sascha turns and looks at himself in the mirror, twisting his body this way and that to admire the curves of the dress. Then, he looks down at his chest, reaching up to grip the cotton-filled bust. “Could I hide a knife in here?”

She looks up at him, then down at herself as though assessing and comparing. Finally, she gives a slow, thoughtful, “I think...?”

Sascha walks across the room on his tip-toes, trying to practice walking in heels, then grabs his favorite knife off of Katya’s boudoir. Carefully, he shimmies the knife down into the bustier, shivering a bit as the cold metal presses against his skin. The handle’s small enough that it doesn’t protrude much, and if he angles his shoulders in just the right position, his false bust can hide it.

“Perfect,” he tells himself.

“What a femme fatale you are,” Katya responds, walking around to his front and giving his chest an appreciative pat. “I’m almost envious of you, Sascha.”

He gives her a coquettish wink before the two dissolve into laughter. 

And while he goes over the plan for the night in his head over and over again, the only thing he hopes is that he has enough time to flirt with Leo before blowing his own cover.

---

He’s cold.

Colder than he was in Siberia. Colder than those nights when he lay awake, all alone, listening to wolves howling in the distance and praying that it wasn’t his last night alive. Cold, cold, cold.

He shivers and tries to reach out, but there’s some strange disconnect between his brain and his arm that’s impossible to solve. His hand flops uselessly at his side, fingers touching wet concrete.

Sascha groans and turns his head, seeing the handle of his knife by his shoulder.

No.

In.

In his chest.

It’s holstered all the way into his chest cavity, his body hiding the metal. Yet he can’t feel it. He can only feel the cold, the growing curls of frost running through his entire body, freezing his fingers and toes first before rolling up his arms and legs.

He closes his eyes as his heart thunders in his chest, trying to run those last few laps to keep him alive.

And in his head, he finally sees Venice.

He sees Leo.

#hope you'RE HAPPY #goncharov #goncharov (1973) #sascha the bodyguard

[thescribeoflostmemories]

Reader: Maiko

Name of guest: scaramouche

Type of service:

flower set!

Additional(s):

dessert teehee

i hope im doing this right TT

Order received!

Warnings: R18+ for desserts, minors do NOT interact! Mostly fluff, some angst not the main couple, OOC Scaramouche (Probably butchered him, I have no idea on how to write him), Most likely inaccurate Geisha.

@mellowwillowy , @eliciana

"To those are lost, shall find within their inner most good and their greatest wish." - Scribe

"One hand, one heartbeat"

============= Few months earlier =============

A young Maiko dressed in her finest has fled the community out of shame, you have seen it. The news of Kazuo’s infidelity had reached you, he had sworn to be true to you once you had retired at your coming of age. Now his little affair is on every news board for everyone to see, including you. “Curse you, Yashiki!” Maiko screeched, crying your heart out. Bumped into someone and with a gauche, you fell down…

“My apologies.” trying to say sorry but hearing the snooty reply of a person

“Tch, it's you again. Look where you’re going, girl!” The short, young man scolded you.

“Jerk!” taking your apology back and just taking off, not knowing who you bumped into. Who ran after you to demand an apology.

Following the twist and turns then arriving at a meadow behind a curtain of odd purply veils. Sullen, wrapping your arms around your knees, pulling it to you. Sitting down next to a patch of wildflowers. “Can you even believe it? I’m just a whole circus to him, curse him, CURSE YOU YASHIKI!”

“All that rude talk for a plot of land? Can’t imagine how wretched your life must be.” You heard a person, huffing as your finger petted a flower’s fragile petal.

“Leave me alone sir, I’m just a stranger to you.” Grumbling, hearing him come close to you.

“You’re right, it is none of my business.” He huffs, just as he was about to walk away he suddenly turned around and faced you. “But tell me anyway.”

Looking at the red flower, it made your blood boil with anger.“Just someone I thought I knew my whole life.”

“You should have punched him if that was the case."

"I would, but. I couldn't, it may be the solution at the time. Though they probably think it's better this way."

" Who? "

" My other friends." You gestured to the frail and growing patch of flowers next to you. This place has always been your secret place, your sacred rabbit hole.

“They’re just a bunch of flowers. They’ll be gone the moment you look away from them.” The indigo haired youth frowned in distaste.

“Even so, they’re the only ones that could understand me in this terrible job.” Pulling your knees closer. “I could almost hear them, if I could just give more time.” A rather fruitless endeavor, but a goal nonetheless. “I’m sorry for taking up your time, I should be going. My matron is most likely looking for me.” Standing up, you dusted off the dirt off your clothes.

He scoffed ,“You better be. I’m not here to babysit you until dusk, you know.” Crossing his arms.

“I’ll try to make it up to you somehow!” waving goodbye to him before leaving.

The Balladeer didn’t move away, he merely looked at the flora you cherished. "You guys better learn how to talk properly to her, or else." Scaramouche hush-ly threatened a harmless meadow of flowers.

==========

Sometime later ===========

“Oh, it’s you… Going to cry again, shortie?” You didn’t expect to bump into the stranger from a few days ago. Nor did you plan on hearing him insulting you. Though what makes his insult odd is that, you’re kinda taller than him thanks to your geta.

“If you wanted a fight, you could have just said so instead of making it public.” Sighing to yourself, thinking you could easily apologise to a stubborn person like him.

“And what’s a poor Maiko like yourself going to do, hmmm?”

“dear sir, I’d appreciate it if you could just please follow me since I still have an apology to give you.”

“You better make it worth my while.”

And so you two shared lunch on you by the flower patch, “Sorry that this is sub par on what you’ll eat where you’re from.” It’s half of your usual simple light meal.

“I don’t believe you made this.” He says since girls like you wouldn’t be allowed by your matron to lift a single thing that isn’t part of their training.

“Then don’t, it’s not like someone has a weapon to your head to say it.” you munch on the eel and rice. Smiling with content at the flavors that blend together well with the white blanket of rice.

You then noticed the young man just stares absent minded-ly at the meal. He felt your gaze and snapped “What?”

“You don’t like it?” raising an eyebrow at him who, in return gave an irritated look.

“Bah! You need this meal more than I do anyway!” He shoves the meal back in your arms, making you a bit confused as to why he does this.

“Uhm Sir-” he cut you off.

“Scaramouche, or Balladeer to you.” Raising your hands in defeat since he seems on edge.

“Alright, alright, Scaramouche.” the name feels familiar, you ought to ask your Mada about him.

“Good, you better learn some manners.” Now this one is a real head scratcher for you. But you just smile at him.

“Do you like flowers?” You suddenly asked him.

Another frown. "They're just flowers." He once remembered a time where he just gaze at the flora and just be content with it.

"Then you like me to make tea for you?" He just laughs, not in a 'haha, that's so funny! ' kind of way.

"I bet it's not even that good."

"I could ask to give you a first time discount." He just gave you this weird look, as if he knows where you work.

"Don't tea houses only take in loyal clients?" That's true, at least until recently.

" We do, but. My mada says we need to change up the rules so everyone has a chance to experience it. " You try to explain to him.

" It might be better to let it stay as is, instead." Scaramouche mumbled.

"True that, though. I'd rather let things move… I mean there has to be something good in the future, yes?" There you are, trying to be hopeful. Failing miserably with how your own mind doesn't seem to like something new… "So, you're coming to have that tea ceremony, right?" Matching indigo eyes with his hair looked at you, opening his mouth and giving a strong.

"No."

============ Present =======

You couldn't help but crack a tiny smile. 'What happened to that, 'No', though? ' Going near him, you patted his shoulder.

“Lord Harbinger Balladeer, would you like to play a game with me?” You offered to play Tora-tora with him, now that you and him meet again in your workplace.

“Go bother someone else.” he tried to shoo you away like some house fly.

You only patted his shoulders to avoid showing any kind of emotion. “Look, nearly everyone’s joining in.”

“I’m still not convinced.”

Poking his cheek. “You'll miss out if you don't join in."

“Fine, fine!” He groaned in annoyance, relenting.

"Everyone please look at the bamboo grove which extends thousands of miles." You all- well the staff started to sing.

Seeing the young looking Harbinger so displeased at the notion of playing Tora tora with you. "There was a vast forest, take a peek and you won't believe what you'll see… " While the older Geisha played the shamisen, both you and him saw each other by peeking at the side of the changing screen. " Wearing a golden headband and a sash. The watonai with all his might has indeed caught, Tora tora tora tora… " clapping as you two start to ready yourselves to get into the stance.

Using your hands in an elegant pose as if you were one of the many spearmen of Inazuma. " Tora tora… tora" stepping out to reveal each other and Scaramouche is in a tiger position, making you the winner of this round. For some reason he has this disgusted look when you do the spear formation.

Another round, this time you were pretending you were the tiger on the prowl. Revealing yourselves to each other and this time he's the Spear man. A triumphant smile graced his lips.

Time has passed, and it's nearing the end of the party. And you're still attending to the youthful harbinger. "I'm glad you enjoyed that, Lord Balladeer." You smiled back at him, letting only him see it.

"Because you wouldn't shut up about it, so I don't have much of a choice." He tries to reject the idea that he liked it.

Accompanying him outside of the pavilion.“I guess, this is goodbye, Lord Balladeer.”

"I can always visit you here." He doesn't seem to understand

" I am bound to my Mistress.” You reminded him, having a personal affair isn't allowed. Even then, you young and dumb for trusting that guy in the first place. "I just wish that time would just sit still for a while… You know?" If you had a vision, you'd probably use it to travel around and not care about the world anymore. Thinking about it right now, didn't Kazuo have a vision? A pyro one at that. Were you also subconsciously using him as well?

You didn't notice the tears that escaped down the ground, until he held your hand with his. "Mukae ni iku." Scaramouche proclaimed boldly.

That tugged on your heart strings a little bit. "Thank you for thinking of me. Goodbye, Scaramouche.” you sniffed, and wiped some of the tears that smudge your makeup.

============ Weeks later. ============

“I told you, I can’t love you Lord Balladeer.” It had been weeks since that party, he hasn't forgotten his promise to you that day. In a few days you'd be a Geisha for completing your training. It was night and you haven't been visiting the flowers as of late. But this Fatui Harbinger just barges into your room through your window.

He huffed, "Then come with me to Sumeru, you'll have better flowers over there. I bet those guys wouldn't let you cry as much as Inazuman's Flora." Replying with confidence as if it were the obvious answer.

With a hand over your face, you said. "Lord Scaramouche, I can't just leave my job and go-"

"Take her Balladeer, as far away from here as possible." The voice of Fuuka can be heard from the door of your room.

"Lady Fuuka! " You turned around and made a deep bow to her.

"That’s Ma’am Wong to you, outsider. I’ve made my decision.” a potent scent of tobacco lingered around her, even when there's a screen between you. “I’m well aware of your intentions, Balladeer. My sons have told me so of your eyes that have been placed on my establishment for quite some time." She let out a puff of smoke. "Treat my daughter well or I’ll have to retrieve her back.”

“Lady Fuuka.” another tear emerges and streaks down your face.

“Go, before I change my mind and sic Kazuo to have her hand instead." The shadow only showed her waving her hand dismissively at them, back turned.

Scaramouche is understandably suspicious of Fuuka's intentions. “You’re rather compliant to let her be with me."

“ I would like to have my child to be happy, rather than to live with regrets in her short life. You may both leave tomorrow. Have some rest before leaving.”

========== Dessert =========

You don't know how it happened but it did, while travelling to Sumeru, you and Scaramouche decided to take a bit of a detour from the main path to the city. Here you two are, having a bit of fun before continuing your journey.

“I told you to keep your mouth shut.” Grunted the Balladeer who has you pinned against a tree, using your thighs to satiate himself.

"Nyah..!?" You groaned when he suddenly touched your breast, playing with it with his free hand.

You could hear some rustling. Out of fear of getting caught, you squeeze your thighs together causing Scaramouche to moan.

"You … - ngh… " His hips moved faster. "If you talk again… your thighs won't be the only … thing… mghn… "

"… What..? "

" That's it! " He forces you on your knees so you're at eye level with his shaft. "If you're going to keep talking."

A/N: Sorry these two took too long, last and this current month have been a bit overwhelming. I’ll be posting the last couple reqs for the event sometime this month. Sorry once more!

Next reqs would be "All I want is love" Yan Pantalone/Yan Capitano

#Falaila's Dessert #scaramouche #scaramouche x you #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche x y/n #fatui x reader #fem reader

[coffee-in-veins]

apologies if you’ve gotten this ask before, but im curious: what do you use for your writing? that is, what program/ site do you write on? (oh and im absolutely loving RRR, keep up the amazing work!)

hey hey thanks for the ask! and don't apologize for those please

first of all - you read RRR? oh, thank you so much for it! it feels so good to know that someone reads what i write! <3 reading this helped me in my day.

short answer: a heavily castrated version of MS Word 2016 in dark version since i write mostly at night with f.lux active and new versions of office make my eyes bleed regardless of colour

long answer:

i write on many things, from notes in my phone if i don't have access to pc due to power shortages, to paper notebooks or napkins (you never know when inspiration strikes), to discord. i guess i'm old fashioned bc i tend to carry notebooks around and it's quicker for me to pen (or rather, pencil, i only write in mechanical pencil) things down than it is to type them. never learned how to type "properly" you see, and eng isn't my native. if we're talking prep before publishing or more in-shelf writing, then currently, it's heavily castrated version of MS Word 2016 in dark version since i write mostly at night with f.lux active. i am looking at LibreOffice now more and more often. have to research their stance on AIs... couldn't find anything so far.

previously, i mostly wrote in paper notebooks and then typed the texts in word and did editing as i went along. then again, it was before this godforsaken AI plague... afterwards i used Grammarly, quite a lot - most of RRR was typed in there. convenient thing, to be honest. or at least, it used to be. some of my things were in Google Docs. unfortunately, now they both grab your things without consent to feed their fucking AIs soo... hard pass from me, and only apps which were butchered in a way that they would not be able to reach the internet.

then again, i post my things on ao3 and tumblr which are constantly scrapped for data... honestly, i try not to think about it too much, because layered on top of everything else it just makes me dissociate.

but hope it answers the question! :} feel free to ask more!

#my shoebox of letters #writers pain

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

omg please do poker face and rings of power. (sorry im sending these two shows to basically everyone but given that i am now mostly a poker face and rings of power blog, i'm contractually obligated)

okok (i'm warning u now that this is gonna be a disaster lol...)

starting with poker face:

charlie? (played by legend natasha lyonne) is an amateur detective who's going on a road trip across america to solve murders whilst on the run from someone for doing something criminal maybe? she's also in a love/hate relationship with a police officer(? detective? honestly idk what job he has... he's involved in the story somehow) who's trying to arrest her maybe? ohh wait also poker? she plays poker really well maybe... or maybe there's no poker involved lol oh god this is just proving how little i observe stuff on my dash pfft....

rings of power (this is honestly gonna be so embarrassing cos i have several mutuals who spent MONTHS talking about nothing but this show lol...):

young!galadriel is... she's there, as is young!elrond, and they're trying to stop ... something... there's a guy with a name i cant remember who may or may not be sauron, and galadriel has a complicated relationship with him (maybe they're former lovers or something?) i dont remember seeing any gifs with hobbits or dwarfs so i think the story revolves around the elves... there's a guy with a Tortured Look in his eye (name is adar? adarin? something like that) and he's imprisoned for some reason maybe? idk people don't like him and he's sad... also everyone's beautiful... that's not a story point, just an observation pfft...

i'm sorrrrry for completely butchering some of ur fav shows lol... both are on my to-watch list so one day i will know what these shows are about pfffft

(anyway feel free to send me other shows i havent seen and watch me blindly try to explain stuff... clearly my brain takes in nothing as i scroll pfft....)

#this is so embarrassing lol #i thought i'd at least be able to remember character's names but NOPE... #i am literally the least observant person in the world lol...

[watchmegetobsessed]

Good girl - Harry Styles

a/n: alright so @dontworrysunflower​ and i agreed that there’s not enough sugardaddy!harry content on here so i took the courage to make a story myself, i hope i didn’t entirely butcher the concept but i had so much fun writing it! it’s hot and whitty, i just loved it. also, the beginning was based on this idea i saw somewhere and i just have no idea where i saved it, so rip to that, but im claiming that it wasn’t my idea though it was so fitting to the story so i took the liberty and used it haha!

PLEASE if you enjoyed the story, give it a like and reblog, it means so much to writers when you give them the feedback, I’m begging you to show a little something if you enjoyed it!

pairing: sugardaddy!Harry / CEO!Harry x Reader

warning: sexual content

word count: 16.8k

masterlist

You can’t stop yourself from growling when you walk into the auditorium and see Nick sitting next to the seat you always take. He knows that’s your spot, he knows you like sitting there because it’s not too much at the front or at the back, it’s close to the window so you have enough light but not close enough to make you shudder when someone opens them. That’s simply the best spot in the room and he knows you always sit there. And yet, even after all the rejection he has suffered from you, he still wants to sit next to you and shoot his millionth shot just to get dumped again and again.

You roll your eyes as you walk across the room and pay a lingering look at your professor behind his desk. There’s another man with him, leaning against the desk with his back showing to you, so you can’t tell who it is, but judging from the expensive suit, he is not a professor around here. The university definitely doesn’t pay enough to wear Gucci.

“Hi Y/N,” Nick greets you as you walk up the stairs next to the rows and plop your notebook and phone to the desk at your spot.

“Nick,” you mumble, already over his shit. At first you tried to be friendly and respectful, turning him down as nicely as possible, but he kept coming at you and now you can’t even bother to be decent towards him. He needs to learn how to take no as an answer.

“How was your weekend?”

“Fine,” you answer shortly, keeping your eyes down on your phone as you put it on silent. Nick then starts telling you about his weekend even though you did not ask him. You are plotting his murder when your eyes move to the front of the room, meeting a pair of intense green eyes standing next to Professor Robertson’s desk. The mystery man is now staring straight at you, his handsome face pulled into a hard expression as he takes his time watching you.

Who is he?

He is tall and definitely muscular, broad shoulders and curls to die for, a faint stubble on his chin and above his pink lips, not the kind that gives away the vibe that he doesn’t care about his looks. It gives him more of a manly sparkle, something no other guy in the room has, including Nick. This man, he is surely a handful and you can actually hear a few sighs around the room as other girls are noticing him. He is… the definition of a man. But who is he?

“So, are you free tonight?” Nick’s question brings you back from your stance and you growl in annoyance.

“I told you, I don’t want to go out with you. What is so hard to understand about that?”

“Why can’t you give me a chance?” he pouts, seemingly ignoring the seriousness you’ve been trying to beat into him when it comes to you.

“Because I don’t want to.”

You turn back towards the mystery man and you realize that he is still looking at you, a playful smirk tugging on his lips as he hides his hands in his pockets before turning towards your professor who finally starts the lecture, robbing Nick from bugging you any longer.

“Welcome everyone, happy Monday. Today we have a special guest.” Professor Robertson claps his hands together in excitement, glancing over at the mystery man. “Since this is a course about startup businesses, I asked an old friend of mine to talk about how he started his business off, built it from basically nothing. Harry Styles is the CEO of Styles Holdings, the parent company of some of the most successful businesses nowadays, working in many different fields. He was so kind to clear his schedule for us today so you can ask him questions following his brief presentation about his journey.”

Harry Styles, the name now rings a bell, you just never knew the face connected to it. You’ve heard about him already, the man is only thirty, yet one of the most influential businessmen in the States, holding so much power and, of course, money you can’t even imagine what he spends it on. For some reason, you imagined him to be some creepy looking guy who looks fifty at the age of thirty, but he is far from that. His chiseled jawline, charming smirk and piercing eyes make every female in the room swoon as he steps next to the professor.

“He looks like a real asshole,” Nick whispers to you and you slap his upper arm.

“Shut up,” you tell him, eyes glued to the man at the front.

“Thank you, it’s an honor to be here. I hope I’ll be able to give out some new information and motivate you all to start your own business.”

His voice! You need to take a deep breath as you lean back in your seat and cross your legs under the table, watching him at the front. He is doing things to you with just his existence and you’re sure you’re not the only one in the room feeling like this.

You drink every word that leaves his mouth as he talks about how he started his company with basically nothing. Started with smaller investments and then slowly moving to bigger businesses until he worked his way up to the top. You can’t seem to move your gaze away from his ring clad fingers every time he gestures with his hands and you notice some tattoos poking from under his expensive suit. You wonder what his dress shirt hides under it.

In addition, he is so fucking smart, you’re convinced there’s nothing in the world he doesn’t know about, it’s clear that he spends a lot of time broadening his knowledge and there’s something incredibly hot about that. Guys your age just want to be done with school already and never use their brain again. Harry Styles is the exact opposite of that.

“So, are you free tonight?” Nick tries again and you almost start screaming.

“Nick, leave me the fuck alone!” you whisper back.

“Come on! Just one date!”

“You know what? I’ll go on a date with you if you can ask him a question that he answers incorrectly,” you tell him pointing at Harry at the front. Nick’s eyebrows shoot up, his smirk is filled with satisfaction though you’re convinced he will lose this bet.

When Harry finishes his presentation he finally opens up the opportunity to ask him questions and Nick is quick to throw his hand in the air.

“Yes, you in the grey hoodie,” Harry points at him and you hold your breath as you wait for Nick to ask his question that will decide if you have to go on a date with him or not. You glance over at Harry and you catch him looking at you for a moment before he returns his attention to Nick.

“I have a very important question for you, Mr. Styles.” “Go for it,” he nods and your heart is beating in your throat when you see him twirl one of his thick rings around his finger in focus.

“Will Y/N who sits here next to me go out with me tonight?”

Right in that moment you want to strangle him to death. Everyone in the room starts chuckling, no one really expected this from him and it seemingly surprised Mr. Styles as well. His eyebrows rise as he looks over at you, eyes meeting with yours once again and you feel like you are about to faint. And then he answers.

“No,” he simply says before moving onto the next question. Nick then turns to you, a smug grin on his lips as he leans back in his seat.

“So, where should we go?” he asks, thinking how clever he was, thought he still didn’t nail it completely.

You just roll your eyes and ignore his existence for the rest of the lecture, still in shock this all just happened. He is lucky the room is filled because otherwise he would already be dead.

At the end of the lecture you give him a fake number so he can finally stop bothering you and he leaves the room so full of himself, it’s ridiculous.

When you are all packed you head down next to the rows until you are standing in front of Mr. Styles who is talking to Professor Robertson. He notices your presence and turns to you with a curious look in his beautiful green eyes.

“You seemed pretty sure about your answer to Nick’s question. Why?” you simply ask and you notice the amusement in his eyes at your courage for coming up to him. He cocks his head to the side, a tiny smirk playing on his pink lips as he answers you.

“Because you are having dinner with me tonight.”

Your breath catches in your throat, his answer throwing you off completely, you were not expecting that. It seems like he is rather entertained by your reaction, a smug smirk curling up the corners of his mouth.

“Unless you already have other pla—“

“I don’t,” you quickly say, sounding maybe a little too enthusiastic, but you couldn’t care less. This man, this fine as hell man just asked you out on a date, you’re not gonna turn him down.

Harry reaches into the inner pocket of his suit jacket and hands a business card over you that holds his name, his company’s name and his phone number in golden plated letters and numbers.

“Text me your address, I’ll send a car for you.”

It’s not an offer or a suggestion, it’s an order you are willing to obey to. You nod and slide the card into your back pocket before paying one last look to him, you walk out of the room, feeling his burning gaze on your frame as you walk away.

You’re a nerve-wreck, running around you tiny flat, trying to figure out what to wear. You’ve already put on your sexiest lingerie set, ready for anything the night might bring you, but you can’t decide on the dress. You’re pretty sure Mr. Styles is taking you somewhere fancy, he doesn’t fuck around with low budget places, you have to at least look like you belong to those places even if you’ll never feel like that.

At last, you decide on a skin tight, satin dress that leaves a great amount of your cleavage uncovered for the wandering eyes and also puts your legs on show with a cheeky slit on your right side. You check yourself one last time in the mirror, feeling pretty good about your appearance for tonight, though you also can’t help but feel nervous about meeting him.

Your phone vibrates with a text that says a car is waiting for you in front of your building and you grab your coat and purse, leaving in a rush. Walking out of the building you see a Tesla parked right in front of you, a driver already waiting for you to open the door for you.

“Good evening, Miss,” the man who seems to be in his forties nods in your way with a warm smile as he opens the door to the backseat.

“Thank you,” you nod, a little out of breath about the whole hustle. Mr. Styles is nowhere to be seen in the car and the driver notices your surprise when he sits behind the wheel.

“Mr. Styles told me to tell you that he is sorry he couldn’t come along, but he had some sudden business to take care of. He is meeting you there.”

“And where is it he is meeting me, exactly?” you curiously asks, but the driver just smiles and ignores your question. Mysterious.

You watch the city lights pass by you, no idea where you are heading, but you can tell tonight is going to be one you’ll surely never forget. The odds of Mr. Styles spotting you from all the other girls in the lecture hall was rather slim, kind of impossible. You never thought yourself to be the particularly pretty type, there are way more gorgeous girls in your lectures, but he still chose you. The way he so easily asked you out still makes your inside burn a little. It wasn’t even a question, but a command. You liked what his controlling manner did to you and you don’t want to fully admit it, but you are already on your knees for this man, ready to do whatever he tells you to.

When the car finally comes to a halt you can’t really tell where exactly you are, you’re just sure it’s a neighborhood that’s definitely not for your budget. The driver helps you out of the car and tells you to let the guy at the front desk know you are Mr. Styles’ guest, they will know where to take you.

The tall building appears to be some kind of boujie hotel, but it surely has a restaurant and a bar as well. You tell the man behind the front desk that you are here to meet Mr. Styles and he escorts you to the all glass elevator, pushing the button of the top level before sending you off to your way.

Arriving to the top, a man is already waiting for you.

“Mr. Styles is already waiting for you, let me show the way,” he tells you and you mumble a short thank you as you follow him.

The top floor of the building appears to be some kind of restaurant, but it’s different from the ones you’ve been to. Every table is in a secluded area that can easily be completely locked away from the rest of the place so no one can see inside the little bubbles. The external walls are completely covered in floor to ceiling windows, giving the most breathtaking view of the city you’ve ever seen.

You follow the man past a few of these private areas until he stops at one of them and as you step inside, you spot Mr. Styles standing at the window, staring out the window with his back to you. He is not wearing his suit jacket anymore and the sleeves of his dress shirt are rolled up, putting his tattooed left arm on display. It’s such a sight, makes you wonder about what other inks he is hiding under his expensive outfit.

Hearing your heels clicking on the marble floor he turns around, eyes falling to take you in as a smirk pulls on his perfect lips you are dying to taste already.

“Y/N, you look gorgeous,” he compliments you as he walks closer and presses a soft, innocent kiss to your cheek before he ushers to the table.

“Thank you. And thank you for the invitation, Mr. Styles.”

“Please, just call me Harry. Mr. Styles is way too serious for this dinner, innit?” The boyish smirk on his lips makes you want to crawl across the table and kiss him hard, but you need to behave, you can only hope tonight will take a more intimate turn eventually.

“I hope you didn’t find me too forward earlier today.”

“I was just surprised, is all. Didn’t think I caught your attention at all.”

“Oh you did,” he nods smirking. “I couldn’t take my eyes off of you through my presentation, if you haven’t noticed.”

“Well, I did catch you sometimes,” you admit with a soft chuckle as you cross your legs under the table. “I’m sorry about the idiotic question from Nick though.”

“Don’t be. It sparkled just enough jealousy in me to make the first step later.”

“Jealousy?” you question with raised eyebrows.

“I saw him trying to chat you up through the lecture, I was close to calling him out on it and asking you out in front of your whole class, but thought I would do it in a classier way.”

“You succeeded in that,” you chuckle softly, finally taking the menu in your hands to choose. Seeing the prices your mouth dries, there are way too many zeros for your liking. Harry catches your discomfort right away.

“Don’t worry, Love. It’s all on me.”

“You know, I would have been fine with just a regular restaurant as well,” you tell him with a shy chuckle, suddenly feeling unworthy of all the hustle around tonight.

“I don’t settle for less than the best,” he simply states and it’s the most attractive thing you’ve ever heard from a man’s mouth.

“So, does that mean I’m the best as well?” you ask with a shy but seductive smile as you lean forward to your elbows, eyes locking with his.

“Yes, definitely,” he answers confidently.

“You don’t even know anything about me, how do you know that?”

He puts his menu aside as he keeps his eyes on you, his intense glare almost intoxicating. Your breathing fastens a little as you try to keep your cool, waiting for his answer.

“I can try and put it into prettier words, but I’m afraid that wouldn’t give off what I truly feel,” he starts with a serious expression. “I have a lot of self-control, Y/N. I didn’t get here with a hothead, jumping into everything without a second thought. I’m a man who likes to plan and be careful with anything he does.”

You shortly nod at his words, not entirely seeing where this is heading, but when he continues, you almost faint again.

“But when I first saw you roll your eyes at that boy in the lecture hall, I was this close,” he holds up his thumb and index finger barely touching, “to fuck you over the professor’s desk without any shame at all.”

Your lips part and cheeks heat up as you squeeze your thighs tightly. A moan almost slips from your mouth, hands gripping the edge of your chair. In just a blink of an eye, you feel your underwear getting soaking wet and he hasn’t even touched you.

“And now that you are sitting right in front of me, wearing this dress that leaves very little to my wild imagination, I need every bit of my previously mentioned self-control to stop myself from laying you across this table and make you scream my name.”

“Fuck,” you mumble under your breath, not able to control yourself any longer. Your arousal is raging, your whole body is in flames for this man.

“I was planning to bring this up later this evening, but now that we are at this point, I better just come clean,” he continues, laying his palms flat on the table. Your eyes wander to his rings and you imagine what they would feel against your bare skin. “I have an offer for you, Y/N. One that I hope you’ll find beneficial.”

“And what would that be?” you ask, a little out of breath, as if you just came back from your morning run.

“I’m way too busy to maintain a regular relationship, but I’m also not a fan of changing my partners often. I was thinking we could help each other out in a way that would be suitable for the both of us. I’m willing to support you financially with a generous amount every week if you agree to spend three or four nights at my place a week and I think I’ve made it clear that we wouldn’t be just watching movies. I’m clearly attracted to you and I would love to have you as my… lover, if you’d like to call it that way.”

His offer is quite forward, you weren’t expecting him to come up with this whole plan for this odd relationship he is talking about. You’re a little taken aback at his words, not sure what to say. You definitely share his attraction, you’d have to be blind not to feel the same way about him and it’s a fact that you could use some extra money, though you don’t know how much he is talking about just yet.

“That generous amount you are talking about…” you wonder shyly.

“Do you have a student loan?” he simply asks and you nod. You’ll probably pay that loan for the rest of your life, or that’s what you thought up until now. “I’m willing to pay it to the last cent as a starter. I also thought about taking responsibility for your rent every month and an additional amount we agree on that you get every week. It is completely up to you.”

“What?” you gasp in shock. “My loan and my rent alone are thousands of dollars.”

“Y/N,” he smiles at you warmly. “I make way more money than I could ever spend. And I do take my part in several charities, but if I’m being honest, I earned your student loan while we were just talking here. It’s not that big of a deal for me and I would love to help you wherever I can.”

It’s amusing how he didn’t sound cocky about his wealth at all, you can tell he didn’t say all those things to brag, he was just stating the facts.

“How much were you thinking for each week?”

“Two thousand seems like a fair amount to me.”

You almost choke on your breath. Two thousand every week? That’s almost ten thousand for a month!

“Two thousand? You are really trying to get rid of your money, aren’t you?” you ask with a shocked chuckle and it makes him smirk as well.

“Just when it comes to things that’s worth the amount,” he cheekily comments.

A waiter appears, interrupting the heated discussion and you realize you haven’t even decided on what you want. Luckily, Harry takes the lead and orders for the both of you and you trust his choice blindly.

“I hope I didn’t shock you too much with my offer,” he softly says once the waiter is gone again.

“It was definitely a lot, in every way.”

“But not too much, because you’re still here, I assume?”

“I have to admit it’s flattering and I could use the money as well. However my morals are telling me this could easily be mistaken for another kind of agreement, if you know what I mean.”

“In no way am I seeing this as an act of prostitution, if this is what you are referring to. It would be strictly exclusive and of course, you can end it anytime you want to. You won’t have to pay anything back.”

“I’m just still a little surprised it’s me you want to do this with. There are so many prettier girls even in my class as well. Why me?” you ask the question that’s been bugging you all evening.

Harry pushes his chair back and standing up he walks over to you, keeping his eyes locked on you the whole time, making your whole inside tremble for him. He stops in front of you, bringing a hand up to your face he runs his fingertips down the side of your face before he cups your jaw in his palm, lifting your head, angling it so your lips part and your neck stretches upwards. His thumb runs along the line of your bottom lip and you are having a hard time keeping your cool and not jumping his bones right in this moment.

“I’m a little saddened you don’t see what I see in you. You’re breathtaking, Y/N. You can capture any man’s attention and I feel honored that you are giving me your time.”

His thumb gently tugs on your bottom lip, playing with it softly and it’s driving you crazy, having him touch you while his eyes are burning into yours, this man is truly something else.

“I want to be the man who pleases you in every possible way. I want to be the one to give you everything you need. Please, say yes and I’ll make sure you will never worry about a thing as long as you let me have you.”

You want to scream yes, you want to fall to your knees and tell him to take you right then and there, but words don’t feel right for the moment. So you turn your head a little just as you grab his wrist with a hand so he can’t move it. Your lips brush against his fingertips until you stop at his middle finger. You make sure to look straight into his eyes as you slide his finger into your warm and wet mouth, lips wrapping around his digit until your teeth can bite onto the thick silver ring at the base. Harry’s lips part as you press your tongue against his finger before pulling your head back, bringing his ring with you, sliding it off him. His finger slips out of your mouth and you tip your head back, opening your lips to reveal his ring that’s caught between your teeth. This is your clear answer to his offer.

Harry draws in a shaky breath before he shuts his mouth, jaw clenching as he stares down at you still. You take the ring out of your mouth and slowly put it back on his finger. His gaze falls to his fingers for a moment before he moves away fast.

At first you get scared you took it too far and he is going to just leave you, but then you see him march to the door, he calls out to someone outside before shutting the door closed, locking the two of you away from everyone else on the other side. He walks back to the table and you gasp when he simply pushes everything off of it, every glass, plate and cutlery flies to the ground, breaking into a hundred pieces, but you don’t have too much time to process it, because Harry yanks you up from your seat and slams his lips hard against yours, one hand on the back of your head while the other one takes a strong grip of your waist, pulling your against him. You moan into his lips, kissing him back with the same amount of vehemence, the feeling of his perfect lips on your completely numbing your senses out.

You faintly feel him moving you, his hands grabbing the back of your thighs before he lifts you up and sits you on top of the now cleared out table. You part your knees wide so he can stand between them, his growing bulge meeting with your pulsing core, the friction driving you crazy immediately.

“Oh fuck!” you moan when he buckles his hips just the perfect angle so you feel just how much he desires you. His lips work their way down your throat, kissing every inch he can reach, while his hands push up your skirt, exposing your legs for his greedy fingers.

“You surely know how to drive a man crazy, Y/N,” he growls when his lips return to you, kissing you in a demanding manner. You have one hand planted behind you for support while your other one travels down his body until it reaches his dress pants. Thank God he is not wearing a belt, because you easily flick the button open with just one hand.

“Yeah? You are doing the same to me, Harry,” you breathe out, giving his pants a tug and he is quick to help you out, pushing them down his legs before his hands come to work on your underwear. He hooks his fingers unto your lacy thong, pulling it down with a swift movement, you’re surprised the fabric didn’t rip. It easily glides down your legs, falling to the marble floor as Harry gets on his knees, his face at the same level as your burning core.

“Seems like I’m having my dessert first tonight,” he hums, lips nibbling on the inside of your thighs as he moves closer to your center, fingers digging into your heated skin.

“Harry, please!” you whine when he is so close, but still hasn’t touched you where you need him the most.

“Please what, Love? Tell me what you want.”

“I want you!”

“You already have me. Where do you want me? Tell me!”

“I want your mouth on my pussy,” you pant, completely losing control over yourself. He doesn’t need more, he presses an open mouthed kiss to your clit, swirling his tongue against the sensitive bundle of nerves.

You’ve always thought you are not into it when a man eats you out. Turns out you are, but only if it’s Harry whose head is pushed between your legs. The man knows what he is doing and you know he can easily make you cum just with his lips and tongue. But right now you are dying to feel him inside you so there’s not time for more foreplay.

Grabbing onto his hair you pull him up and he is panting a little when he stands back up, his green eyes piercing down on you.

“Fuck me, now,” you tell him, getting blunt with your desires, but it seems like this is exactly what Harry likes. He smirks, leaning down he kisses you hard and you can taste yourself on his lips and tongue, it’s intoxicating. Your hands move down between your bodies and find their way into his boxers, wrapping around his erected length. He is huge, certainly the biggest you’ve ever dealt with and your inside already shakes and he is not inside you yet.

“Are you on birth control?” he asks, lips pressed against yours as he pushes his boxers down, completely freeing himself. You stroke his cock, feeling up his length in your palm, making him whimper under your touch.

“Yes. And I promise I’m clean.”

“Me too. Are you fine with going raw?”

“Please!” you beg him, every fiber in your body screaming for him.

“Be a good girl and hold onto me,” he tells you, moving your arms around his neck. He grabs the base of his cock and lines himself up with you, kissing your lips one last time before he pushes inside you gradually, but quite hard.

“Oh fuck! Harry!” you gasp at the feeling of him stretching you out, filling you up entirely. He fits inside you so perfectly, like the pieces of a puzzle finally clicking.

“So wet and warm, all that for me, baby?” he coos, staying still for a little.

“Just for you,” you whisper back, pressing your lips against his when he finally starts moving.

He starts off slow, but quickly picks up his pace, thrusting his whole length into you every time he pushes forward. You bring your legs up around his waist, locking him in your hold both with your legs and arms, just wanting to be as close to him as possible.

He fucks you so good, you completely forget about the fact that you are in some boujie restaurant and there are people outside. Your bare ass is on top of a dining table, but it doesn’t matter as long as you feel Harry’s hard cock inside you.

“Feeling good, baby?” he asks between his pants.

“Yes, oh God!” you moan, fingers digging into his luscious curls at the base of his neck.

“Are you happy you went out with me instead of Nick?”

“Don’t fucking talk about Nick when you’re balls deep inside me,” you growl just when he hits your G-spot, your eyes rolling back at the sensation. Harry chuckles before his lips attack the soft skin on your neck, kissing and nibbling it while he keeps up his steady pace.

You’re nearing the end, your whole body feels like on fire and your ass has gone completely numb on the hard table, but you don’t give a single fuck. You just want to feel him cum inside you while you cum with him.

“Harry, I’m close,” you whine, your orgasm clearly close to burst inside you.

“Cum for me, baby. Cum on my cock,” he urges you, a hand moving down between your bodies and when you feel his fingers circling on your clit, a scream erupts from you without shame.

It doesn’t take long for you to reach your high. A few more thrusts and the pleasure washes over you in waves, making you chant his name as if it was a magical spell. Seeing you orgasm throws Harry over the edge, his thrusts become uncoordinated and he whimpers uncontrollably, fingers digging into your waist until he comes to a halt, both of you panting heavily. His head falls to your shoulder as he is trying to catch his breath. Several minutes pass by before he pulls out of you, a whimper escaping your lips at the sudden empty feeling. You lean back onto your arms, chest still heaving while Harry pulls his pants back up before he walks over to the pile of debris that’s left from your table setting. He saves a napkin from the remainings and gently cleans you up with it before throwing it into the bin in the corner of the room. He then helps you off the table and gives you support while you put your underwear back on.

“M’sorry, I got a little carried away,” he chuckles softly, cupping your face in his hands, but you just smile up at him cheekily.

“Don’t be, I enjoyed every minute of it.” You steal a quick kiss before parting from him.

“Does this mean our deal is on?” he asks, eyes filled with hope as he waits for your answer.

“It definitely is,” you smirk at him before pulling him down for another kiss. You’ll never get enough of his perfect lips, whether they are pressed against your lips or somewhere lower on your body…

“Giving me the number of a Domino’s? You’re a cruel girl, Y/N.”

Nick takes the seat next to you with a huff, clearly pissed that his plan didn’t work.

“You lost the bet, Nick,” you simply tell him, not even looking up from your notes.

“What? He said no, so if you went out with me he would have been incorrect!”

“But I didn’t. So he was correct,” you retort, paying him one short glance. “Besides, I also had plans already that evening.”

It’s been one week since your dinner with Harry at SkyHigh (you later found out that was the name of the place and he also happens to own it, no wonder he had no problem with basically destroying the dining set and fucking you on the table), and you’ve already spent four nights at his luxurious penthouse, fulfilling the deal you two have agreed on. Harry made sure to show you around his home in the most pleasing way, if you might say. In a matter of time no surface will be left untouched by the two of you.

“Plans? So then why did you offer to go out with me if I get it right?” You sigh rolling your eyes, this guy is really getting on your nerves today.

“I had a date, Nick. With an actual man who can take no as an answer, but he doesn’t have to because he knows how to treat a woman. Now stop fucking bothering me, because I’m not interested in you.”

Just as you finish your little speech, your phone’s screen lights up with a text from Harry. Your anger towards Nick washes out of you in a second as you reach for the device to read his message.

Harry: Have an amazing day. Can’t wait to see you tonight.

You quickly learned that Harry is not big on using emojis when texting, but you learned to read his lines correctly. You spent Friday and Saturday night at his place, but eventually had to go home so you can get ready for school on Monday, it seems like that one night apart was just as hard on him as it was on you.

Harry is a very affectionate person, he likes to touch and to be touched, keep a hand on you at all times when you’re over. He offered you your own room for your staying, but he made it clear you are more than welcome in his bed and you’d be stupid not to sleep with him. He likes to cuddle and usually wakes up all wrapped up around you, it’s surely a sight to see such a powerful and handsome man cling onto you like a koala bear. When he is still sleeping, you like to run your fingers through his hair, gently massage his scalp. He often hums in his sleep and he looks so much younger and more carefree when he is that vulnerable to you, even if he doesn’t even know about it.

Y/N: What do you want to see me in?

You’ve stepped up your game in dirty texting since meeting Harry. He is busy throughout the day so calling him is not too convenient, you’re left with texting so he can reply whenever he has the time. It seems like he is in a boring meeting or having a breather, because he replies right away this time.

Harry: Preferably nothing, but I’m happy with whatever.

Your professor has started the lecture in the meanwhile, so you try to keep your giggle down as you read his text. He has a brilliant but also dirty mind and you can’t get enough of him.

Y/N: You’re making me misbehave at my lecture, stop with the shameless flirting!

Harry: Be a good girl.

You have to push down a moan reading his last words. This man knows his power over you and he surely likes to play with it. Leaving his text read you put the phone aside and try to focus.

You miserably fail.

The day can’t come to its end fast enough. You’re the first one to leave the room when your last lecture ends and you jolt home to pack your overnight bag. Harry has tried to convince you to let him send a car to you every time you set your feet outside, but you told him it’s useless and you like wandering on your own. Though he wasn’t entirely satisfied with your answer, he respected your decision.

When you leave your apartment you decide to swing by the grocery store so you can make something for Harry. His personal chef always makes the best dishes for the two of you, but you figure Suzan would let you take care of dessert if you asked her. So you get everything you need for a killer tiramisu before you head over to his place. He texted you earlier that he would get home around eight, meaning that you have plenty of time to do your magic in the kitchen with Suzan. At first you found it surprising how easily Harry trusted you to come and go in his house as you please, but then you realized the place has such a high security, you couldn’t do harm even if you wanted.

“Hello Suzan!” you call out happily when you arrive and the elderly woman is already working on dinner. “How are you?”

She smiles at you widely, her wrinkles swallowing her eyes almost entirely. You haven’t spent that much time around here, but you always made sure to treat the staff right. Most importantly because Harry treats them like family as well, he told you how Suzan has already retired, she works for him so she can save up some more money for her four grandchildren. Elliott, his driver has three daughters and Harry is paying for their tuition at the best school in the city which Elliott wouldn’t be able to afford on his own, no matter how much he worked. There are three cleaning ladies who work in rotation, Nadine, Juliet and Iris, all of them are working mothers, Iris is raising two boys on her own. Harry makes sure they can take a day off anytime they are needed at home and he pays them extra after each of their children and you can guess how generous that extra amount is. It’s clear that all his employees are highly appreciated here and he takes good care of them for the work they are doing. It’s such a rare thing to see especially when it comes to extremely wealthy people. But Harry is different and you find out new things to praise about him every day.

“I’m doing splendid. How was your day, Darling?” Suzan coos as you join her in the modern kitchen.

“Tiring,” you huff, setting your grocery bag on top of the counter. “I was wondering if I could take care of dessert tonight, would that be okay?”

“Oh, of course! What are you planning to make?”

“My aunt has a killer tiramisu recipe, thought I would give it a go myself,” you smile at her in excitement.

“Let me know if you need any help, alright?”

Time flies by fast as you work in the kitchen with Suzan. She tells you all about her secret for the perfect garlic sauce while you share stories with her how you used to bake with your aunt when you were younger. She is such a delight, makes you feel like home at a place you’ve been coming to for just a week.

“You have a nice evening, Darling. I’ll see you around,” she smiles once dinner is finished and set on the heating serving plates so it doesn’t cool before Harry arrives. You’re almost done with dessert as well and Harry could be home any moment.

“Thank you, Suzan, see you soon!” you call out before she leaves.

Once you are all alone you put on some music, dancing through the kitchen as you clean up after yourself, singing along to the songs without a care. Your music taste is not essentially the same as Harry’s, but he is always open to your suggestions, never missing out on a chance to listen to something you like so much.

Now The Weeknd is singing through the speakers as you twirl around the marble floor of the kitchen, putting away the cleaned dishes. You don’t even notice Harry’s arrival, you’re way too lost in the song.

“I don’t know why I run away, I’ll make you cry when I run away…” you sing with the singer, putting the finished tiramisu into the fridge as Harry walks in, a playful smirk tugging on his lips as he watches you.

He has been loving having you around, you surely bring life to his home that often feels too big and empty for him. Seeing you fool around in his kitchen brings him a warm feeling in his chest and he can’t push his smile down when you bust some weird yet interesting dance moves.

“Take me back ‘cause I wanna stay, save your tears for another…” You sing into a spoon using it as your microphone when Harry sneaks up behind you, making you jump when he curls his arms around your waist from behind. “Oh shit!” you gasp turning around in his hold. “You scared me!”

“M’sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt your worldwide tour,” he smirks smugly and you roll your eyes at him, but steal a quick kiss regardless. “What are you doing in my kitchen?”

“I was just cleaning up. I made dessert tonight, I know I’m not Suzan, but I think you’ll like it,” you smile at him proudly.

“I’m sure I will, I’m starving.”

“Great. Then go and change while I set the table for us,” you shoo him out of the kitchen, but not before he steals another quick kiss.

When the table is all set Harry returns wearing a pair of sweats and a plain white shirt. You absolutely love him in his expensive, perfectly tailored suits, but there’s something in seeing him so loose and comfy. The two of you sit at his dining table on each side of the corner so it feels intimate even with eight other empty seats at the table. He always asks about your day first, listens to whatever insignificant little thing has happened, seemingly very interested in anything you have to say.

“Nick called me out today for giving him a fake number,” you admit with a chuckle.

“Still bitter about the failed date?” he smirks at you over his plate.

“Very much. But I told him I had a date with someone else.”

“Really? Was he jealous?”

“I guess. Couldn’t feel nice when I told him I was with a man who can treat me right.” Putting your fork down you lean onto the table with a satisfied grin. Harry reaches up and caresses your cheek gently before he pinches your chin between his thumb and index finger, pulling you into a slow but definitely heated kiss.

“Love that for you,” he chuckles softly before you both return to the food. “Are you staying over tomorrow as well?”

“I can’t,” you sigh. “I have this extra credit thing tomorrow until like eight, by the time I get home, pack my stuff and get here it would be way after ten and I have an early morning the next day. I’m sorry.”

“You know, you can always just… leave some of your stuff here. You can have one of the dressers or just simply use the closet in one of the guest bedrooms.”

You’d be lying if you said you haven’t thought about it, but you were waiting for him to bring it up himself, not too keen on inviting yourself into his home more than he would want.

“You sure about that?” you ask just to be certain he wants it. He clearly has boundaries when it comes to maintaining any kind of relationship, the last thing you want is to push something on him that he is not entirely comfortable with.

“Of course. Would be easier and it’s quite logical,” he nods and you look for any sign of doubt, but you find none.

“Okay,” you shortly say. “I’ll bring some stuff over next time.”

He tells you about his day briefly after that and you give him the same amount of attention he always pays you even when you have absolutely no idea what he is talking about. It’s hot when he talks about business, gives him a lot of power.

Then you bring out dessert and watch him take his first bite in excitement, curious if he likes it.

“Mm, are these cherries?” he hums, taking a better look at it.

“Yeah. It gives the whole thing a nice sour taste, it’s a little unusual but I love it. What do you think?”

“It’s easily the best I’ve ever had.”

“Oh, don’t be such an ass kisser,” you laugh. “You eat at the best restaurants all over the world and dare to say my tiramisu is the best you’ve had?”

“It is,” he nods with a cheeky smile, his hand reaching out to pull you to his lap. You happily obey, throwing a leg over him so you sit on his lap facing him. He brings the fork to your mouth and feeds you some that you proudly take. It does taste amazing, but you doubt it’s the best he has ever had.

“I’m not lying. It really is the best.”

“You’re just saying it to get into my pants, huh?”

“Oh baby, I don’t think I have to lie to do that,” he chuckles lowly, his eyes darkening a little as he pecks your lips softly. “But I do think it’s the best because you made it just for me. Gives it something extra.”

“You are such a flirt,” you grin at him, shaking your head. He chuckles, dipping his finger into the dessert, bringing it to his face as he wipes the cream to your jawline before he leans closer and licks it off your skin.

“Mm, I am,” he hums, kissing down your neck, his hands wandering down your body until they can slide into your shorts, his fingers playing with the elastic of your underwear.

“You’re not gonna finish your dessert?” you breathe out, already getting lost in his touch, not caring much about the tiramisu anymore.

“Oh I’m planning to. But I was thinking I could eat it off of the chef herself,” he grins at you, his green eyes filled with lust and that boyish excitement you always see in them when he is trying to seduce you. Not that he has to try, he has you wrapped around his fingers just by his existence.

“Oh, I guess now is the perfect time to tell you I was lying, Suzan made it, but I don’t think she’d be a fan of your idea,” you tease him, your grin widening as his eyes meet yours.

“You are… such a pain in the—“

“Where?” you cock an eyebrow at him, fingers dancing down the length of his neck, across his chest until they reach the waistband of his pants. “Tell me, where do I pain you, Harry?”

The tiramisu quickly gets forgotten as Harry growls against your lips, pushing his chair back as he carries you into his bedroom to show you where exactly he feels that so-called pain.

“Alright, come clean. Who have you been fooling around with? You’ve completely fallen off the face of Earth these past weeks!”

Your best friend, Cece throws the question at you the moment you arrive at the bar. You laugh at her accusation even though it’s completely true.

“Who says it has anything to do with fooling around with someone?” you ask as you wave at one of the waiters. The young man quickly makes his way over to you. “Hi, a tequila on the rocks, please.”

“What kind?”

“The best you have,” you simply tell him, your friend eyeing you in shock. The guy walks away and you turn to face Cece. “What?”

“Since when are you drinking fancy tequila? I didn’t even know you like drinking tequila on the rocks.”

You didn’t either, but it’s Harry’s favorite and he often makes you a drink as well whenever he is feeling like loosening up a little at the end of a long day. You’ve brought some of your stuff over to his so you don’t have to return home every other day now, you’ve already spent an entire week at his not long ago, only dropping by your apartment to water your plans and air the place out a little in the middle of the day. You quite enjoy going to his place straight from school and spend your evenings with him and not just in his bed, but in general. You’ve been doing a lot more things together recently, he has taken out to his favorite restaurant besides the ones he owns and you’ve been watching a lot of movies together, showing your top five to each other on cozy evenings when you didn’t feel like jumping at each other the moment Harry arrived back from work.

“I mean, I know your grandma left a good amount for you, but I thought you were saving up,” she comments.

“I am, but… I have other incomes these days,” you tell her quietly, feeling a bit guilty for talking about it.

“Okay, spill the beans. Did you become a stripper without telling me? I thought we agreed we would hit the stage together!”

You laugh at her reaction shaking your head.

“No, I’m not a stripper. I… I’m not sure if it’s the right term to use, but I guess I have… a sugar daddy now? This feels weird to say because he is not some creepy old dude.”

“What the fuck?” she gasps, slamming her hand to the table. The waiter guy arrives with your drink and gives Cece a weirded-out look, but she couldn’t care less. “How did that happen? And who’s the guy?”

You take a sip from your drink and pull your phone out, showing her a photo of Harry you recently took of him sneakily. He doesn’t like to be photographed even though he is probably the most photogenic man to ever walk the planet, so you had to get a little tricky, snapping a picture of him when he was on the phone one evening, looking so fucking good in his dress pants and white shirt, the first few buttons undone to reveal his chest tattoos he hides so well under his expensive clothes.

“Wait, I know this dude, isn’t he like that young millionaire? What’s his name… Henry?”

“Harry. Harry Styles,” you correct her.

“Yes! Bitch, where the fuck did you meet him?”

“One of my professors asked him to present at our lecture. It’s a long story, but he ended up asking me out after the lecture and he kind of gave me an offer.”

“What kind?” Cece asks with narrowed eyes as she takes a sip from her cocktail.

“Well, we cleared the air out that we are both obviously attracted to each other, so he offered to financially support me if I’m willing to spend time with him,” you tell her, implying that you’re not talking about just playing board games with him, but it seems like the message wasn’t that clear to Cece.

“Like how? Going to places with him? Cleaning his place naked?”

“Cece, we are having a sexual relationship,” you sigh. “It’s basically an exclusive relationship where we use each other for our… physical needs. I spend most of my nights at his, don’t see it as some kind of sex slavery, it’s all consensual and actually pretty nice. We spend time together, he is treating me great.”

“So… basically you are dating him?” she points out and you pull your brows together.

“No, I said—“

“I heard what you said, but it entirely fit into what we call dating.”

“Yeah, but it’s not that.”

“Does he take you out?”

“Yes,” you nod.

“You spend the nights over at his place?”

“I do.” “And you said you’re exclusive, right?”

“We are, yes.”

“So the only odd thing is that he is paying you for your time, but that’s not that weird seeing that the guy could buy out the whole city if he wanted. This pretty much sounds like you two are dating.”

“But there are no emotions involved,” you tell her quickly, trying to prove your point. Cece gives you a who-are-you-trying-to-fool look and you stare back at her in confusion.

“You can’t do no emotions, Y/N. I’ve known you my whole life and there’s absolutely no chance you won’t fall for the guy if you haven’t already started falling. You are basically living in a relationship and it’s just a matter of time before you catch feelings.”

“I-I don’t—“

“You think you don’t have feelings for him, but you’re just living in denial,” she bluntly tells you.

You take a moment to think about what she said. The two of you have been really living like a real couple, spending time with each other as often as possible, being exclusive and acting like you really are dating, but that’s not what you agreed on. Harry made it clear he has no time to maintain a normal relationship and you’ve been honestly fine with it until now. Because you do care about him, that’s why you always make sure dinner is ready even on Suzan’s days off whenever he gets home, or why you make his morning coffee just the way he likes it, or why you text him checking in on him whenever you know he is having a rough day. These little things went over your head the whole time, but now you realize you are doing them because you care about him.

“Look, it’s not a bad thing,” Cece starts, grabbing your attention once again. “Just make sure you don’t fall entirely before finding out if he feels the same way. There’s a chance he is going through the same thing.”

Could he be? Is there a possibility that he has changed his mind about the nature of your little agreement? He surely acts like he cares about you too, he does all those seemingly insignificant things for you as well. He always sets the water a little cooler after his shower so it’s the perfect temperature when you get under the water, he offers you to choose a movie to watch even when it’s his turn and he doesn’t whine when you actually take the chance and put on another silly teenage drama to watch. He calls you in the mornings when you spend the night back at yours, telling you he just wanted to hear your voice. The way he keeps a hand on your thigh in the car or whenever you are out for dinner, it always flutters your heart, but is there a chance he is doing all these things because he has feelings for you. Your little arrangement has been going for over a month now.

Harry is a physical person in general, it could be just his nature, how he is with everyone else. He is a caring and polite man, all these tiny things could be just his decent manners, generally looking out for the person he is sharing his bed with. You can’t make yourself believe his intentions with you have changed.

“Shit,” you mumble under your breath before chugging down your whole drink at once, waving at the waiter to bring you another one.

Cece successfully gets under your skin, made you realize things you might have not even thought about if she didn’t point them out. You hate her for that, but it was also needed. The thoughts cleared out before it was too late, hopefully.

You order drink after drink and Cece has never been the type to say no to some partying. She drinks with you, only difference is that she takes it way better than you. When it’s nearing midnight, you are completely drunk, wildly dancing to the music the no name band is playing in the corner of the bar. Cece decides it’s better if you head home, but you’re quite persistent.

“I want to stay! Come and dance with me!” you beg her, but she can tell you’re close to the phase where you just pass out and she won’t be able to take you home on her own. So she takes your phone and searches for the contact she knows will help her out.

“Hey baby, having fun?” the deep voice answers the call and it makes Cece blush for a moment.

“Hi, this is, um—This is Cece, Y/N’s friend.”

“Oh. Is everything alright?” he questions, immediately becoming alerted.

“Well, she had a little too much to drink, I’m afraid. I could use some help with her before she passes out entirely.”

“Text me the address, I’ll be there in ten.”

Cece does as she was asked and then goes to finally beg you away from the dancefloor. Not too happily, but you let her walk you back to the booth the two of you shared through the night.

“Be a good girl and drink this, please,” she tells you, shoving a big glass of water into your hands, and you just grimace.

“Good girl? That’s what Harry calls me.”

“Oh Jesus, I would have been fine without this detail,” Cece chokes out, but she is pleased to see you drinking some of the water finally.

“He is so fucking great, C. Like, the whole package!” you start raving with a heavy sigh. “He is beautiful and nice and so fucking funny! And the things he does to me in bed…”

“Maybe keep those to yourself, alright?” She chuckles shaking her head.

Right at that moment, Harry barges through the door, looking around with a hard stare until he spots you sitting in the booth, still mumbling to Cece.

“Hey,” he breathes out stepping to the table. Cece’s eyes widen as he sees the man himself, wearing a pair of light flares and a simple black shirt, the first few buttons undone, revealing his thin chain with the cross pendant. Cece now gets why you are so into the man, not that she had any doubts before. “Cece, right?” he glances at her.

“Oh, um, yeah. Nice to meet you,” she stutters offering a hand that Harry shakes firmly. The man has a great hold for sure. “Sorry I called you, but I wasn’t sure I can make it back to her place with her like this.”

“Harry! You’re here!” you gasp upon realizing that the man standing at the table is him.

“Yes, baby, I am. Had a little too much fun?” he asks with a small smile playing on his lips.

“Are you mad?” you pout at him, afraid he might see you as this immature little girl who can’t stay within her boundaries when it comes to alcohol.

“I’m not, but let’s get you home, alright?” He gently caresses the side of your face and Cece watches the small interaction with parted lips. “Did you have a tab?”

“Uh, yeah. I’ll just—“

“Don’t worry about it, I got this,” he tells her, already making his way to the bar to pay your drinks.

“Isn’t he the fucking best?” you mumble to Cece, feeling out of breath from just the effort of keeping yourself in a sitting position. You really shouldn’t have drunk this much…

“He is!” Cece gasps. “I’m so jealous of you now.”

“It’s a shame he might not be that into me though,” you scoff with a frown.

“I highly doubt that.”

You don’t have a chance to react, because Harry returns and he helps you out of the booth before turning to Cece.

“Do you need a ride home?”

“I’ll be fine, I’ll just call an Uber,” she smiles at him nicely, grabbing her purse from the seat as she follows the two of you out.

“Send Y/N a text when you get home so I know you arrived safely.”

“Sure,” she giggles, feeling lightheaded that he is concerned about her. “Take good care of her, Harry,” Cece tells him as he helps you into his car. This time there’s no driver, so he makes you sit at the front, buckling you up like you’re a kid.

“I will. Thank you for calling and I wish next time we meet will be under different circumstances,” he chuckles softly before getting into the car.

The drive back to Harry’s place pulls you into a shallow slumber, enjoying the warmth of the car and the comfortable seats. Harry wakes you up just so he can help you out of the car once you arrive, but seeing how sleepy you are, he decides it’s easier to just carry you up to his bedroom.

“Harry?” you mumble under your breath when he lays you to his bed.

“Yes? Do you feel sick?”

“No,” you shake your head softly. “Sleep with me?”

“Of course,” he smiles, kissing your forehead gently. You faintly hear him shuffling around the room, probably undressing before he finally slips under the covers, his strong arm curling around your middle as he cuddles you from behind.

“M’sorry you had to pick me up,” you sigh, already sobering up slowly.

“S’alright. Get some sleep,” he tells you truthfully as he kisses your shoulder.

“You are so good to me,” you whisper, more to yourself rather than to him, but he definitely catches your words.

“Of course. You deserve the best, Love.”

“You are the best,” you breathe out before you finally fall asleep.

The morning comes with a killer headache. Harry was considerate enough to draw the curtains in, but even the lack of natural light can’t ease the pounding in your head. As you slowly blink your eyes open, you spot a big glass of water and two Advils on the nightstand with a note next to them.

“Had to go in, will be back shortly. Have a nice recovery. Xx –H”

Growling you snatch the pills from the nightstand and swallow them quickly, washing them down with the water. Then you take some time to yourself to contemplate what happened last night, staring up at the ceiling. Cece’s words still occupy your mind entirely about your feelings for Harry. Upon realizing them, you managed to get so drunk that Harry had to come to get you. He didn’t fuss about it, didn’t say a word, just took you home and put you to bed. Last night was the first time the two of you shared his bed without anything sexual happening and you’re not sure how to feel about it, you wish it happened differently, but there’s nothing to do about it now.

It’s pretty late by the time you get yourself out of bed, but Harry is still nowhere to be seen. You wonder if he is upset that he had to pick you up from a bar in the middle of the night and he is now avoiding you. The thought is eating you alive so badly that you decide it’s best if you talk to him right away and apologize for your behavior last night.

You get two coffees from his favorite place and head to his office, feeling anxious about facing him and also because it’s going to be your first time seeing him at his workplace. It’s not that he told you not to go there, but he never invited you either so you’re not sure how he feels about you showing up.

“Good afternoon, how can I help you?” the nice woman at the reception greets you upon arriving.

“Hi, I’m here to see Har—erm, Mr. Styles?” you shyly tell her.

“Do you have an appointment?”

“No, but um… Can you tell him Y/N is here?”

“A moment, please,” she politely excuses herself before getting on the phone. You look around in the fancy looking hall of the building and you can only imagine what the rest looks like if the hall is like a page from an expensive interior design magazine.

“Miss?” the woman catches your attention. “Mr. Styles is waiting for you in his office. Thirty-fifth floor, Daisy at the front desk will help you out up there,” she instructs and you thank her before heading to the elevators.

It’s a long way up and people get in and out of the elevator as you make your way up to the top. You feel so out of place, everyone is dressed in fancy looking suits and dresses while you’re wearing just your usual jeans and a knitted sweater, your bag thrown across your body, the two coffees in your hands as you nervously chew on your bottom lip.

Arriving at the top, you are immediately greeted by Daisy, as the woman downstairs told you.

“Good afternoon, Miss Y/L/N, let me show you the way to Mr. Styles’ office,” she offers kindly and you follow her down the hallway that’s filled with pictures of Harry with several influential people. Some of them you recognize, singers and actors, but some are completely strange to you, though you can imagine them being big names in the business.

Daisy leads you to a double door and she knocks on it firmly before you hear Harry’s voice calling out. Daisy opens the door for you and you step into the spacious and rather luxurious office. Harry is standing behind his long desk, his eyes snapping up at you as you walk in, Daisy closing the door behind you.

“Hey, what brings you here?” he asks with a soft smile, abandoning the papers on his desk as he walks around it, kissing your cheek shortly when he reaches you.

“I, um… brought you coffee,” you awkwardly tell him, handing him his cup.

“Is that all?” he asks with a soft chuckle.

“No,” you huff. “I just… I didn’t know when you’d be back and I really wanted to apologize.”

“For what?” he furrows his eyebrows, leaning against the edge of his desk behind him.

“Last night. I totally lost control, I know I shouldn’t have drunk that much and I’m sorry you had to come and get me. It was very immature and childish of me.”

“Don’t be silly, it happens to everyone. And I’m glad Cece called me. I would rather go and get you anytime of the day than have you find your way home on your own.”

“But it’s still not your responsibility to take care of me when I randomly get drunk. Not that it happens that often.”

“Okay, but I like taking care of you,” he replies. “Don’t worry about it, alright? It’s all good. You said it yourself, it doesn’t happen all the time so I’m fine with stepping in once in a while.”

You sigh in relief, happy that he doesn’t hold a grudge for coming to your rescue last night. You were worried he would see you differently because of it, but it seems like he really is cool with it.

“Did it really get you that worried?” he asks with a soft expression, his fingers dancing across your jawline before he tips your head up so he can look into your eyes.

“Kinda,” you admit with a shaky chuckle. “I was just afraid it would make me look like a helpless child. I know you’re older than me, but I’m not like this and I don’t want you to get the wrong idea of me.”

“It was just one tiny thing among everything else I’ve seen from you during our time together. It won’t change my opinion about you that easily. It just tells me that you still like to let loose sometimes with your friends which is completely fine. You definitely should, you’re only in your early twenties. I don’t want to hold you back from experiencing things I’ve already been through.”

“So you’re telling me you’ve drank too much before and someone had to pick you up?” you ask him raising your eyebrows.

“Well, it hasn’t happened recently, but I’ve been there, yeah,” he admits chuckling.

“I can’t imagine you drunk.”

“Haven’t been in more than five years, if I’m being honest. The hangover in the morning kills the fun in it now. If I got drunk now, I would need three days to recover.”

“You’re talking like you’re sixty or something,” you chuckle, your hands finding their way to his hips as he cups your face in his palms.

“I’m halfway there already,” he smirks at you playfully, but you just roll your eyes at him.

“You’re still a hottie.”

“Glad you think that,” he chuckles before pressing his lips against yours. He takes his time kissing you, pulling on your bottom lip, playing with your tongue and you feel like a giddy little teenager. You get so lost in his kisses that you don’t even notice the knock on the door.

Harry pulls back, turning his attention towards the door that opens without his approval. When you glance over your shoulder you see a tall, gorgeous woman with fiery red hair walk in, wearing a tight dress that’s business casual but also very sexy at the same time.

“Oh, I didn’t know you had a guest,” the woman stops at the door.

“It’s alright, Diana.” Harry’s hands fall from your face and you turn to face the woman fully. She is… perfect. In every way. Her makeup, her hair, her figure, she is everything you ever wanted to be and suddenly, you feel like a little mouse compared to her. “Y/N, this is my right hand, Diana,” Harry introduces her and she steps forward with a charming smile, holding a hand out for you. “Diana, this is… a good friend of mine, Y/N.”

You try not to flinch at the title Harry gave you as you shake Diana’s hand.

A good friend? Does he fuck all his good friends?

It’s not that you agreed on a title when it comes to others, but this is not what you were expecting for sure. Would have it been that bad calling you his girlfriend? You are exclusive after all, people don’t have to know it’s just an agreement.

“Nice to meet you, Y/N. Sorry for barging in, Daisy was on the phone so I didn’t know you weren’t alone, H.”

H? She calls him H? You don’t like Diana. Not at all.

“No worries,” Harry waves in dismissal.

“I just wanted to tell you I just got off the phone with Mr. Harlow, he is willing to close the deal next week.”

“That’s fantastic,” Harry beams.

“Congrats, Harry. Another successful deal closed,” she smiles at him and you feel the sudden urge to wipe it off her face along with her stupid, perfect lipstick.

“Thank you, but it wouldn’t have happened without you.”

“I’ll start the paperwork,” Diana nods. “It was nice to meet you, Y/N,” she smiles in your way before walking out.

“She is… your partner?” you ask, trying your best to push down the jealousy that’s about to flood you entirely.

“Yeah, have been working with her for years, she is very good at negotiating,” Harry explains, his focus on the papers on his desk. You feel like this is your cue to leave.

“Cool. I’ll just… get going then.”

He glances up, leaving the papers once again, stepping back to you.

“I’ll be home soon, alright? Will try to finish soon. Choose a movie we can watch when I arrive.”

“Sounds good,” you smile faintly. He kisses you softly, running his fingers down the side of your neck before letting go of you.

All while you’re at Harry’s place on your own, you keep thinking about Harry. To be exact, Harry and Diana and what they might be doing in his office. They spend so much time together through the week, and Diana is literally the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. There’s no way she and Harry have nothing going on. But even if they weren’t hooking up, why would Harry choose you over her?

The more you think about it, the worse it gets. Your thoughts get clouded by jealousy and you have no idea how to stop it. You keep reminding yourself you don’t have the right to feel this way, but you just can’t help it.

When Harry arrives late noon, you already feel out of control. He barely makes it into the living room, you throw yourself at him.

“Hey, missed me this much?” he chuckles, but wraps his arms around you anyway, walking you to the couch.

“I always miss you,” you truthfully admit, kissing the corner of his mouth. You want to feel him, you want to be the one to please him so you can convince yourself you are the only one who can make him feel that way.

You push him down to the couch, straddling his lap before your lips attack his, kissing him hard and passionately. Your fingers work fast on his shirt, pushing it down his toned arms as you grind against him, the friction of his growing erection underneath you already driving you crazy.

“I want to make you feel good,” you moan against his lips, hands wandering down his chest and abs until you reach his pants, unbuttoning it without wasting a moment.

“I’m all yours, baby,” he breathes out, sinking into the soft cushions. Before you could reach into his pants and free his throbbing erection, you pull back just enough to look into his eyes.

“You are?” you ask quietly, his green eyes burning into your gaze.

“Yes,” he nods, a hint of seriousness obvious in his look. You believe him and it just riles you up even more. You need to have him. Now.

Kissing him once again, you move down until you are kneeling between his legs, hands pulling down his pants along with his boxers. His hard cock springs free, so glorious and welcoming, all ready just for you. You wrap your hand around it, giving it a few pumps before leaning closer and kissing the tip softly. Harry whimpers under your touch, his head falling back in his pleasure. Sticking your tongue out you give his whole length a lick, spitting on it at the end to wet his skin and get him ready for you.

“Shit,” he moans, his hand moving to your hair as you wrap your lips around him, pushing down on him slowly, enjoying how he completely falls apart under your touch.

Seeing him in this state is better than any drug. Such a powerful and unreachable man, completely vulnerable just for you, it’s a dream come true.

He is pushing on your head but not hard enough to control your movement, it’s just a nice pressure to let you know what he wants. You start bobbing your head, taking him as deep as you can without gagging, working your hand on the rest you can’t reach with your lips.

“Oh fuck, Love, you are such a good girl,” he pants, his hips buckling up to meet your head’s movements. He is so deep inside your mouth, you suck on him hard, your hand that’s been on his thigh moves to hos balls, gently massaging them to add to the sensation.

“I want you to cum in my mouth,” you tell him when you come up for some air, panting your words heavily.

“You sure?” he asks. It’s not the first time you’re sucking him off, but he never finished in your mouth before. You nod confidently before you sink his length back into the warmth of your mouth.

Harry grips your hair harder, more and more whimpers and moans leaving his perfectly pink lips as he nears his end. You are desperate to please him, to see him come undone under your touch, to have an effect of any kind on him.

You press the head against the inside of your cheek, the change of contact catching him off guard and he growls your name when you sink down on him one more time before he finally orgasms, his cum spurting to the back of your throat.

“Oh fuck, baby!” he breathes out, completely lost in his high as you let go of him with a pop and sit back on your knees, pleased with the state you managed to pull him into.

He reaches out for you, bringing you to his lap while he pulls at least his boxers back up. You sit on his thighs as he nuzzles his nose against the crook of your neck, his touch is so delicate and soft, as if he wasn’t cursing and moaning your name just a few moments ago.

“What was that for?” he questions with a soft smirk on his lips.

“Do I need a reason to suck you off?”

“Absolutely not, I was just… surprised.”

“Did you like it?” you arch an eyebrow at him.

“I think it’s pretty obvious that I loved it.”

“Then that’s all that matters,” you smile sweetly at him, kissing his lips chastely.

You successfully forget about the existence of Diana for about a week. Everything is back to its normal, you spend at least five days a week at Harry’s place, basically already living there. He takes you out on Friday which ends up in some hot sex in his hallway, because according to him, your dress was way too hot for him to control himself any longer, but you’re not complaining.

You’ve been planning to go for some book shopping on Saturday, the urge to read something new has been killing you and Harry offers his company for your little trip, suggesting the two of you have lunch somewhere near the pier.

Saturday morning you are woken up by featherlike kisses on your bare shoulder, and a warm palm massaging your hipbone before moving closer to the between of your legs.

“Mmm, mornin’,” you hum into the pillow, smiling to yourself when you feel Harry pressed up against you from the back, his excitement very evidently poking your bum. His lips kiss their way up your neck and jawline and when you finally turn your head they meet your lips in a sweet morning kiss.

“Slept well?” he asks in his deep morning voice.

“Mhm,” you smirk, feeling his fingers teasing you between your legs. “What are you doing, Mr. Styles?”

“I had a dream about you,” he murmurs, his lips nibbling on the soft skin where your shoulder meets your neck. His fingers slide between your folds and it’s no surprise you are already wet for him.

“Yeah? What happened in that dream?”

“I fucked you from behind. Woke up with a painful hard-on,” he bluntly tells you, a smirk tugging on your lips. Moving a hand behind you, your palm meets his very obvious erection that’s been poking your ass. Wrapping your palm around him you give him a few pumps, earning some soft moans against your skin as you arch your back and angle him so when he thrusts forward, his cock slides right between your legs, but not inside you just yet.

“Do you have dirty dreams about me often?” you ask in a teasing voice as you start moving your hips, making his dick slide between your wet folds, the tip poking at your clit every time you push backwards.

“It’s been occurring more often lately,” he admits, his hand moving up on your body, slipping under the thin fabric of your top that you threw on last night before falling asleep, his palm covering your breast, giving it a nice squeeze that makes you moan shamelessly.

“What happens in those dreams usually?” you breathe out, the friction of his cock between your legs building up your own orgasm slowly.

“Not sure it’s very gentlemanlike to share them with you,” he chuckles boyishly, pressing an open mouthed kiss to your shoulder as he pinches your hardened nipple with his fingers.

“Showing your hard dick into my ass is not that gentlemanlike either, if you ask me,” you call him out grinning smugly and it earns you a harder thrust between your legs.

“You bring this out of me,” he growls into your ear, tugging on your earlobe gently as the urge to feel him fill you up grows inside you.

Just when you reach between your legs, ready to usher his length inside you, his phone starts vibrating on his nightstand and you growl in frustration when he reaches for it, stopping what you had going on entirely.

“M’sorry, baby. I have to take this.”

“Really? Now?” you whine as he pulls away from you, grabbing a pair of clean boxers from his dresser as he brings the phone to his ear.

“I’ll make it up to you,” he grins before answering the call, walking out of the room, but you still hear him greet the person on the other end of the line. “Hi Diana, what’s up?”

He left you in bed all riled up for Diana? Is he fucking serious?

Jealousy and rage washes over you in a blink of an eye as you push yourself up in the bed. You can’t believe he chose her over you on a Saturday morning, he could be balls deep inside you by now, but he is now probably locked up in his study, talking to Diana.

You march into the bathroom, feeling like a cold shower might help you, but as the water rains down on you, you still feel like you’re about to burst and it might be because you were getting close to your orgasm.

Driven from a sudden idea, you grab the removable showerhead and change the setting of the water stream on it before moving it between your legs. It’s nothing like Harry’s dick or even his touch, but it’s what’s left for you, because the man you want is too busy talking to another woman. You reach down and start playing with your clit, the stream pushing you towards your edge more and more and you’re desperate for a release.

When it finally comes, you let go with a gasp. The bitter taste in your mouth ruins it for you however and you keep thinking about how it wasn’t Harry who made you feel good. Raging thoughts flood your mind as you get out of the shower and get dressed.

You are sitting at the kitchen island, drinking on your morning coffee when Harry emerges from his study.

“Sorry about that, it was kind of an emergency.”

“No worries,” you dryly answer, but he doesn’t seem to notice.

“When do you want to leave? Have you eaten? We could have brunch somewhere near the mall.”

“Oh, I forgot that I was invited for a birthday party tonight and I thought I would check in on my apartment, get ready there. I haven’t been home for a while.”

Harry grabs himself a bottled water as he joins you at the kitchen island, looking at you with furrowed eyebrows.

“We can drop by your place after shopping and then come back here.”

“Yeah, but I really want to clean up a bit there and you know, pretend like I still use that place.”

I also would love some space from you, because right now, I’m way too close to flipping over this whole Diana thing.

“You sure?”

“Yeah. Can we postpone the shopping to next week maybe?”

“Works for me,” he simply shrugs, giving you one last look before dropping the whole thing.

You are out of Harry’s place before twelve and arriving back to your place, you can’t help but feel this sharp pain in your chest whenever you are thinking about him, which is basically every second.

You can’t lie to yourself anymore, everything you feel whenever it comes to Harry, it all points to one inevitable thing: you are hopelessly in love with the man. And to think that he might be into someone else is heartbreaking. You can’t stop thinking about how he might have feelings for Diana instead of you and it takes a toll on you, crushing you unmercifully.

You didn’t lie about the birthday party, you just didn’t plan on going, but this morning changed your mind and you decided you could use some time apart from Harry and the party gave you the perfect excuse. You weren’t essentially good friends with the people that were invited, but they seemed like a nice bunch so you thought it couldn’t hurt to give it a go.

The only thing that’s already pissing you off by the time you arrive at the bar is that Nick is there too, being friends with the birthday girl as well.

“Well, well, well! Haven’t seen you outside of the lecture hall in a long time,” he smirks at you once you are settled with your drink. He sits beside you, luckily keeping some distance but you’re ready to kick him in the balls if he tries to get closer.

“I’ve been busy.”

“With the man you went on a date with when you were supposed to meet me?”

“Okay, first of all, I was never supposed to meet you, Nick. Stop pretending like we ever had anything going on. And second, yes, I’ve been with that man.”

“Is he your boyfriend?” he questions and you almost snap at him saying yes, but then you realize that it wouldn’t be true. “So he is not? I guess then you still can go out with me finally.”

“Just stop already, okay? How many times do I have to tell you that I’m not interested?” you growl at him, turning away from him to join the conversation on your other side.

Later that evening a group photo is taken and uploaded to Instagram and it’s mere coincidence that Nick is still sitting next to you when it is taken. You don’t pay much attention to it, even share the picture in your story as well, but until you get a text from Harry.

Harry: Didn’t mention Nick would be there too.

You stare at it for a few moments, not sure how he knows Nick is there and then you realize. As unusual as it seems, Harry has an Instagram, he just never posts on it, only following his close friends… and you.

Opening the app you quickly scroll through who has seen your story and there he is, Harry’s name hidden somewhere at the bottom, but it’s clearly there.

Y/N: Didn’t think I have to report every time I see him somewhere.

Your reply feels just as passive aggressive as his was, or that’s what you think. His answer comes in seconds.

Harry: The guy has been trying to get into your pants since forever, would have been nice if you told me he was there too.

Y/N: A lot of things would be nice, Harry.

Harry: Are you trying to imply something?

Y/N: Idk, you’re a smart man, figure it out.

You mute the phone and place it to the table, ready to ignore it for the rest of the evening, but you don’t make it too long. About ten minutes later the screen lights up with a call from Harry. At first you want to ignore it, but then you climb out of your seat and walk outside so you can hear what he is saying.

“What?” you snap not too friendly.

“You didn’t fucking answer my texts!”

“Did it occur to you that it’s because I don’t want to talk to you right now?”

“What’s with the attitude all of a sudden?” he questions and you can tell he is getting angry but he is not the only one with a temper.

“I don’t know, Harry. You text me about Nick out of nowhere, demanding to know whenever he is around me as if he was some kind of criminal. What’s up with that?”

“I told you, the guy is always up in your ass, you’ve told me yourself, I just don’t like it that he is anywhere around you.”

“Out of the two of us it’s not you who gets the right to feel that way. As far as I know I didn’t leave you naked in bed right when we were about to have sex for another person. Think about that for a moment,” you throw it at him, feeling relieved you can finally speak your mind. The line gets silent for a moment and you wish you could see his face at the moment.

“I’m coming to get you,” he then states, it’s definitely not an offer.

“You are not.”

“I am. We are not having this conversation over the phone.”

And with that, the line dies. You could throw the phone against the wall in frustration, he could piss you off so badly, you hate how much effect he has on you.

The bar where you are is not too far from Harry’s place and you barely get yourself another drink and return to the table when he walks in. You don’t spot him at first, but other girls from your group do.

“Oh my God, it’s that hot businessman from Professor Robertson’s class!” One of the girls, Mindy gasps and your eyes snap over to Harry who is roaming the place, clearly looking for you. He is wearing a pair of light washed jeans and a simple, black long sleeve, his hair a little messy, but he still looks breathtaking. You hate him for that.

“Shit,” you mumble under your breath, right when he finally spots you and makes his way towards you.

“He is coming here, oh my God!” the girls gasp in excitement while you are trying to figure out a way to escape the situation, but you miserably fail.

“Y/N,” he calls out your name stopping at the table, his eyes flickering over to Nick who sits two people down from you. You spot the frown on his face, but he manages to control himself so others don’t notice his hate towards the guy.

“I’m not leaving with you,” you simply shake your head the rest of the group watching the scene unfold intently.

“Wait, he is the guy you’ve been seeing?” Nick speaks up upon realizing the situation. “You are fucking Harry Styles?”

“Nick, shut the fuck up,” you snap at him, completely over his shit at this point.

“Mind your own business,” Harry tells him, but just as expected, Nick doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut.

“No, wait. You turned me down and then went out with him? He is like, what, thirty or something?”

“So what?” you give him a puzzled look.

“Shouldn’t you be with someone your age?”

“No, she shouldn’t,” Harry answers before you could even think of an answer. “Don’t put the blame on others for being a disgrace to men and bothering women when they are clearly not interested in you. Grow up and try to get some manners for yourself and maybe you won’t die a virgin, buddy.”

Everyone gasps at the way Harry put Nick to his place and you can’t hide your smirk either, no matter how angry you are at Harry. Nick just mumbles something under his breath totally defeated before he disappears in the direction of the bar as Harry turns back to you.

“Y/N, can we please talk?”

“I told you, I don’t want to talk right now.”

“But we fucking need to, so would you please at least come outside so we don’t have to do this in front of all these people?” he snaps, clearly running short on his patience and you’re not sure you want to wait for when it’s completely gone.

Sighing you grab your phone from the table and shimmy your way out of your seat once again, walking out of the bar with Harry following right behind you.

“You can’t just come here and order me around, Harry, not when I especially told you I don’t want to see you!”

There’s a little alleyway next to the bar and you snap at him the moment you are hidden from the prying eyes and ears.

“You can’t expect me to just sit around at home and wait for you to come back whenever it’s convenient for you.”

“But that’s exactly what you should have done! You don’t have the right to be all… possessive and act like a fucking cave man just because Nick was next to me on a picture! Not when you fucking leave me in bed for a call from Diana!”

“Y/N, it’s not what you think, okay? Let me explain it to you.”

“Okay, explain why you chose her over me and if we are at it, just let me know if you want this whole thing over because I definitely won’t be second after her. I did not sign up for that.”

“What?” he looks at you with widened eyes. “Why would I want to end it?”

“Because you clearly have a thing going on with Miss Perfect!”

“Diana and I are just friends. Have always been.”

“Oh yeah, and should I just believe it?”

“Well, you might want to, because she is married and very much planning to start a family with her husband.”

You instantly freeze. You were not expecting this information and it throws you off. It never occurred to you that Diana might have a spouse herself, you were way too hung up on the thought of her and Harry.

“I know this morning was very awkward and I wouldn’t have answered the call, but she’s been having trouble with getting pregnant, her and her husband, Peter have been trying for years now and she’s just started treatment to help her conceive. She called because her lab results came back and they weren’t as promising as she hoped them to be. We’ve been friends for a long time, I’ve been there with her through it all and I’m her closest support other than Peter. I’m sorry I made it seem like I chose her over you, I was just not sure if I should share it with you. After all, it’s not my place to talk about it, and to be honest, I didn’t think it would leave such a scar in you, baby.”

Now you just feel like the biggest asshole in the entire world. You had this whole situation mistaken and let your insecurities get into your head.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t think…” “You couldn’t have known. I’m sorry too, could have handled the situation way better.” Harry takes a few steps closer now that he is sure you won’t throw a punch at him and reaching up he runs his fingers down the side of your face. “And I’m sorry about this Nick thing, but I just… completely lost my mind when I saw him next to you on the picture.”

“You should know the best out of everyone that he has no fucking chance at me.”

“I know, but still, I’m a very jealous man, especially when it comes to people I love.”

Your lips part and eyes widen as his words set in. Did he really just say that he loves you or is he just playing some kind of cruel game with you?

“Y/N, this was not my plan, but I couldn’t help it. You swept me off my feet with your whole being and I fell in love with you. I tried to tell myself it’s just a momentary thing, but it’s not. I think about you when you’re not with me and every time I wake up and I see you next to me I know it’ll be a good day because it started with you. I fucking love you and I’m done pretending I’m not. I want you, the whole… relationship thing with you, I want to be the man who makes you happy. Please tell me you feel the same,” he begs and for a moment you think he’ll get on his knees in front of you, but he stays stood, hands cupping your face as you stare back at him, completely in awe at his words. You wrap your hands around his wrists as you smile at him.

“If my jealousy filled scene wasn’t enough proof for you, I do feel the same about you, Harry.”

“You do?” he asks, excitement filling his beautiful green eyes that appear way darker under the poor light that’s coming from the street.

“I would be stupid not to,” you admit with a chuckle. “I’ve been in love with you for a while now. Took me some time to realize, but I’m quite sure about it now.”

“Oh my Love, you have no idea how happy you just made me,” he chuckles in relief before pressing his lips against yours, kissing you with all his feelings. He kisses you over and over again, pushing you backwards until your back meets the brick wall. He grabs the back of your thighs and makes you wrap your legs around his waist as he keeps you up easily, his lips never leaving yours.

“Come home with me, please. I want to make love to you,” he breathes against your lips and your heart flutters at his words.

“Take me home then,” you giggle, pressing your forehead against his.

For a few minutes the two of you stay like that, enjoying the closeness and the intimacy of the moment and you wonder what could be going on in his head.

“What are you thinking about?” you ask, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“I just… have to thank Trevor for his invitation,” he tells you, but you just give him a puzzled look. “Professor Robertson. If he didn’t invite me to his lecture I would have never met you. I owe him one,” he explains with a chuckle, making you laugh as well.

“So, does this mean you’ll finally introduce me as your girlfriend when we meet someone?”

“I assume you caught on that when you met Diana,” he breathes out. “I actually wanted to call you my girlfriend, but didn’t know how it would sit with you.”

“So you called me your good friend?” you ask with a chuckle.

“Wasn’t the brightest solution, right?”

“Not really. It made me wonder if you fuck all your good friends.”

“Just the ones I’m in love with,” he smirks at you cheekily, stealing a quick kiss.

“Oh, are there more?” you ask raising your eyebrows at him, pushing his hair out of his forehead gently.

“Just you. My only good girl,” he answers before kissing you again.

SEQUEL: MY BEST GIRL

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed!

#harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles au #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #sugardaddy!harry #CEO!harry #harry styles smut #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff

[genderpunk]

being mentally ill fucking sucks because like, you'll be fine. you'll get used to it and you now know coping mechanisms and how to manage shit and you'll actually be fine most of your days you're like around 6 in a 1-10 scale and like YOU'RE FINE you're no longer 14 and having panic attacks everyday and freaking out over a car and then venting on a discord server because even though you have therapy you prefer just opening your heart to strangers that yk can and probably will use that against you somehow. you're fine, until you fucking wake up screaming three in the goddamn morning sweating like a fucking bitch and you're like damn what did it get really warm during the night why am I fucking SOAKED and you have work or school or whatever in a couple of hours so you go take a shower but as soon as you step out of your fucking bed your brain just starts acting like you're about to get butchered by a fucking lion and you have to go around your entire house checking every door and window to make sure they're locked and maybe you have to lock and unlock the living room three times just to make sure but not in a paranoid way you're fine you're FINE now anyways you have to go and like have a real life because again ur not 14 anymore so you can't just stay in bed feeling like shit and staring at the ceiling and calling it a day NAH you have to talk to people and you can manage but also it's like there's a little siren in your little head going WOWOWOWOWOWOWO every single time someone walks behind you and you might as well just put a little sign around your neck being like hi im insane today please talk to me tomorrow but that's not that socially acceptable is it. anyways mental illness sucks because it doesn't matter how used you're to it and how many grounding techniques you know at the end of the day you're still mentally ill

#negative #actuallyptsd #that being said i want to tell any 14-15yo reading this that it does get better and shit is worth it #ok to rb

[saturnsstufff]

If your requests are open, could you maybe do a C!Techno x Reader? Like, the Butcher Army is there for Techno and Phil wasn't able to give him a\such an early head's up so he's not really prepared, and Quackity has the reader hostage when they show, cause maybe they were outside doing something... You don't have to, of course! -Sugar Anon (may I claim this Anon?)

Ooh! Most definitely! And of course you can claim it your my first anon!🖤

Warnings: Blood, swearing

Techno was a pretty well known man, lets face it. Maybe not in the way you hoped, and in this instance you mean he was wanted.

But you were not awhere of that because you lived with him out in the chilly Tundra. Phil would usally bring you two the new updates and anything you should be aware of. So when he didnt show for his morning tea you were a but skeptical to say the least. But techno had casually shrugged his shoulders, waving it off that he had gotten busy. This was true. Phil was a awfully busy man, he never seemed to stop moving, building, or exploring. So you joined techno on his assumption.

Techno was casually brewing potions that afternoon. Not a uncommon occurance to say the least. You had grown accustomed to seeing the towering man working over his bottles. His large but gentle hands gracefully, and carefully manuvering the glasses to where he pleased.

"Techno love? Im going to go trade these books nearby ok?" You mentioned as you took your cloak. Slipping it on so you could contain your warm. Techno hummed in agreement. Since you were so far from L'amanburg he didn't really mind you walking freely to the nearby village. He actually viewed your common trips as a large help.

"I have seven emeralds in that chest over there, could you see if any of them are willing to trade for a mending book?" He asked well he looked up to you. His reading glasses resting on his nose. You smiled brightly and nodded.

"Of course!" Anything you could do to help you were down to do. L'amanburg wasn't aware Techno had a lover, mostly because Techno didn't want you getting pulled into his rather volient affairs. He viewed them as his battles. Not battles that you had to fight.

Well collecting the gems into your basket he spoke up again, his hand coming to the small of your back. "Take Carl ok? I can't have my princess walking like the peasants do" he said bemused. Pressing a gentle but loving kiss to your forhead.

You leaned into him, enjoying the physical affection he gave you. Techno wasn't one to voice his love Rather, instead he would gift you, or make physical actions twords showing you how much he cared.

You walked out and hopped onto Carl the sturdy, and loyal steed waiting for the new adventure he would be taking. Edging your heels into him you began to head for the forest.

After a while of riding through the woods you began to grow weary. You felt like you were being watched. You were not a Hybrid like Techno so you couldnt smell or hear any abnormalities. But you just knew somthing was off. It was a harsh mental debate on whether to turn around or continue. Ultimately you decided it was best to just turn around. For how on edge you were you figured that telling Techno, and him laughing at you was better than lingering outside anymore.

You pulled the reigins, signaling for Carl to turn, however when you did, someone had jumped onto Carl behind you. Grabbing you tightly to prevent your flailing. You couldnt help the blood curdling scream you let out before your mouth was covered by a hand. You were panicking. You couldnt see your attacker but very well felt them behind you.

"Im gonna make you a deal. Your going to take us back to that nice cottage of yours, or I'll paint your blood all over the snow" the voice sneered next to your ear. "Im going to remove my hand. If you so as utter a word I wont hesatate to get rid of you. Am I clear?" The voice was slow, but threatening. They meant what they said. You could only nod slowly as he removed his hand from your mouth. "In case you get a wild burst of courage... I'll just leave this here" he had taken his sword out. Lingering it by your neck. You didn't know what else to do, so you just took the reigins and slwoly started back home.

When you got to Technoblade's Cottage you were forced off of Carl, the snow did little in softening your fall. You looked up praying thag techno herd some commotion.

"Technoblade get your ass out here!" The man Yelled, you looked up to him. He had black hair poking out from his beanie. Underneath his armor was a bloody a apron. All, in all, not someone you wanted to be around.

When the door opened you called out for Techno. Trying to make a run for him. But instead you were only grabbed by your ankle and dragged back to the raven haired man. The sword he held finding it's way to your neck.

"Let her go Quackity." Techno's eyes were narrowed and calculated. He wasn't pleased by any means for how Quackity was manhandling you.

"You think I'm going to listen to you? Your fucking delusional. Heres whats going to happen Techno. Your going to come with us. Or I'll kill her and give your front lawn a nice new red decoration." You whimpered. All you wanted was Techno. You wanted to be in his arms, you didn't like how This 'Quackity' man was talking or handling you.

"Your going to let her go first." Techno stepped closer. His hand drawing his blade. You could see Techno's breathing. He was angry, and so were the voices.

"I wouldn't step any closer." The blade pressed in more. Your hand coming up to try and push the blade away. "Your going to drop your blade and walk up to fundy to get handcuffed. Then I'll let her go." You watched as Techno weighed his options. In the end he did drop his blade. He valued your life above everything. Once his hands were tied securely, you were let free. The first thing you did was run to techno. Hugging onto him for dear life.

"(Y/n) listen to me. Your going to go into the house and wait for Philza. Ok?" You looked up at him with pain in your eyes, shaking your head.

"No! Im not letting you go alone!" You started to tear. You didnt know where they were taking him. But you knew it wasn't good.

"(Y/n) I said go in the house. I will be fine.." He manuvered his head to wrap around yours since his arms couldn't. "I don't want you involved ok?..." his tone was gentle, trying to ease your haywire nerves.

"Techno please let me come.." Your eyes begged, but he didnt budge. Quackity only took and shoved Techno further.

"Wait in the House!" Was the final thing he said as he was forced over the Hill.

Waiting for his return had you beyond restless. You could only look from the clock back to the fire. The raging 'What if's running through your brain. It was extremely late before techno had returned back home.

When he opened the door you rushed over to him. Almost tripping over your own feet. To feel him in your arms was the one thing you needed to calm your nerves. You gripped onto him for dear life. His arms gently wrapped around you. Rubbing a ligjt circle into your back.

"Thank god your home" you said. Your face buried into his chest. The lingering sent of dynamite and the iron smell of blood on his clothes. "I was so worried about you..." you felt his hand move to the underside of your thighs. Lifting you up into his arms so he could move inside.

"Come now princess... You didnt really think I would let anything happen to myself, now would you?" He mused. His eyes soft as he looked up into yours.

"I.. I mean" You looked down at him, the bit of worry still remaining. He sat down on his sofa. Leaning back into it as he looked up at you.

"Baby girl, you know Technoblade never dies" He said cocking a eyebrow up as his face went smug. You only smiled a little at that. Moving to rest your head in his neck.

"I still worried..." you said gently. Relaxing into his chest. Glad to see him home safely.

"I know princess... I know" He knew he would have to tell you about the execution. But for now he knew you were distraught. He may have been poor at comforting, but he knew right now the best thing was for you to just lay in his arms at peace. Let you try and forget what Quackity had probably etched into your memory for months to come. Because Quackity was only the start now. Now everyone knew, Techno had someone he truly loved.

#dream smp #dreamsmp x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #mcyt x reader #minecraft #minecraft fanfiction #minecraft x you #techno x reader #mcyt #technoblade x you #technoblade x reader #technoblade #tb

[mskatesharma]

i love you tags! yeah i can’t believe more people aren’t complaining about the fact these two sisters didn’t have a convo that wasn’t abt Anthony after episode one. it was glaringly obvious. even in episode 1 though the only thing these two girls talked about was suitors. they barely had a conversation that wasn’t about a man or alluded to a man. the show tries to play their conflict as about the sisterly relationship but it is way too anthony centric. i really hated that they had Edwina cry over not being good enough for anthony & watching her try so hard to please him. idk i did not watch this show to see a brown woman try so desperately to win this white man’s approval.

the sisterly relationship was weird bc Kate was really playing more of a maternal role but the show also didn’t want to Mary to be seen as an absent mother. (they had no idea what to do with Mary and that is so obvious in the first episodes). they sacrificed so much of the Sharma relationship to make Kate and Anthony mirrors. and what’s worse is that they didn’t even bother to properly explore the new dynamics of the sharma family or explore Kate’s different personality and trauma. i never got the vibe that either sister really new each other at all and that’s largely bc i don’t think they really knew themselves. sorry this got long!

I think you're referring to the tags on this post, which were (please mind the awful grammer):

#kate & edwina#bridgerton#kate sharma#edwina sharma#the viscount who loved me#of my favourite bits of the book and I honestly get teary everytime#*one of#the fact that we didn’t get an equivalent scene in the show#instead most? all? of their conversations after episode one centred on anthony is something i’ll hate these writers for forever#naaaah the way a white man came between these two sisters will never not infuriate me#jfc i will never be over the way they completely butchered kate & edwina#and the sharmas as a whole#WHERE WAS THE KATE AND EDWINA LOVE STORY YOU KEPT GOING ON ABOUT BECAUSE IM STILL WAITING TO SEE IT#soulmates my arse

They really didn't have a conversation that wasn't somehow related to Anthony after episode one, did they? It's so bleak jfc. When they released the posters for this season, and they had Anthony in the middle of Kate and Edwina, I was pissed off for so many reasons, but one of the main ones being this white man was shoved in the middle of these two South Asian sisters. I remember telling someone that if I hadn't read the book and didn't know about Kate and Anthony, that main poster would have turned me off watching season two, because it's the last thing that I would want to watch. It was so fucking reductive, but I guess it was a good indication that the storyline was going to be as well.

You are absolutely right that they didn't know what to do with Mary, they wasted her character (and Shelley Conn), as she was basically a non-entity for the for the first five/six episodes,?

Tbh, I didn't necessarily mind that they tilted it to make Kate and Anthony mirror each other even further, it's just infuriating because they altered the Sharma family dynamic so drastically when they didn't need to. You could have had Kate take on the mantle of being the de facto head of family, but still have Mary trying to emotionally support both her daughters, like she does in the books? The Sharmas could have still had a bond similar to that of the Sheffields in the book, with both Mary and Edwina knowing what Kate really wants, but Kate struggling to admit it to them, and them not neccesarily knowing why she struggles. Kate seemed so lonely on the show, for no reason, because even Anthony had Violet and Daphne in his corner encouraging him to choose happiness and love, because they could see that marrying Edwina was not what he truly wanted. On the show, Mary and Edwina thought that what Kate craved most was freedom and independence, and returning to India, when that wasn't it at all.

I just…I feel like Kate and Edwina's (and Mary's) relationship on the show had next to none of the warmth that we see in their book relationship? You never really got the sense that they understood the other better than anyone else. Edwina's line in episode eight where she says Kate "does not know herself" pisses me off, because actually, Kate knows who she is and what she wants, she's just been too scared to admit it and really go for it because a) she doesn't think she's deserving of it or done enough to earn it, and b) she doesn't want to open herself up to a similar heartbreak like she suffered when her father died. It takes Mary telling Kate that she deserves to be happy, and that she doesn't owe people things in return for being loved, for Kate to actually admit what she wants.

And like you said, they didn't properly explore Kate's trauma and grief, and just how that affected everything she's done since her father died. Yes Edwina was right to be angry, but we never get a conversation between her and Kate where it's acknowledged exactly what Kate has sacrificed, and what else she was willing to give up if she thought it meant Edwina (and Mary) would be settled and happy. And it sucks.

#ask #the-greendalehumanbeings #bridgerton #kate sharma

[warmau]

☆ [nostalgic] summer romance!au jaehyun exactly on time for the valentine boy! ........well....... find others here: johnny | haechan | taeil | taeyong | mark | jaemin | yangyang | yuta | sicheng | chenle | kun | yukhei | doyoung

how you end up here, you don’t know, but you blame johnny suh because when things get weird it’s usually his fault anyway

johnny’s smile is a thousand and one watts - he reaches out to pass you the beat up guitar case and again, you don’t even take it by choice, it’s nudged into your hands before you can really even say a word

“im not joining your band.”

“it’s not mine - it’s ours.”

jungwoo twirls a drum stick between his fingers and grins from his spot on the garage couch

“no johnny - we all know it’s yours.”

your lips thin and the only reason you don’t fling the case to the floor is because you actually like the guitar that’s inside. 

granted you haven’t seen it since middle school and it probably still has that horrible sticker on the back of it that you remember picking at until all the little pieces you got off were uncomfortably stuck under your nails.

“guys - it’s summer. we have nothing better to do.”

“says you, i got an engineering internship at samsung.” 

jungwoo chirps again and you try not to roll your eyes

we all know about the damn samsung internship dude.

“yeah - and i have to work at the family bookstore.”

mark lee walks in, holding as many redbulls as he can fit between his elbows, they spill out and onto the space beside jungwoo

you listen to mark open one and johnny groan

“ok you all have something to do, but we-” he motions behind him at you “don’t have anything to save us from the boredom that is about to take up two months of our youthful lives!”

“hey-”

you cut in and all three sets of eyes focus on you

“i have something i want to do this summer.”

johnny’s long figure straightens in anticipation while jungwoo cocks an eyebrow and mark gives you an encouraging smile

“im not going to tell you what it is, but it’s definitely not starting a band with you guys.”

you lean the guitar case against a nearby wall and add a half-hearted shrug

“sorry.”

the walk from johnny’s house to yours isn’t long, it takes about fifteen minutes if you’re really going slow. 

plus you’ve done it so many times, you basically set your body to autopilot.

you think about it - the thing you want to do this summer before you go away for university and home becomes a new place and a memory at the same time.

you’re not known for being sentimental, johnny has even gone so far as to label you as a bit ‘apathetic’ . but still you know this is your last chance to really enjoy the place you grew up in.

you turn the corner at the street that leads down to where you live and in the hot evening air you hear something

it’s the sound of a bike, the pedaling is light but the frame must be old because it creaks a little when it slows down slightly to maneuver to the left and pass you.

you look up and see a boy

brown hair still wet from the pool or a shower maybe, dimples at the corners of his smile, the two sizes too big white shirt fluttering behind him in the breeze

for what seems like longer than a second - you lock eyes - his match the color of autumn leaves and teddy bear fur 

and for some weird reason can’t stop thinking about them even well after you get back home

is he new in town? i’ve never seen him before?

finally managing to shake off the curiosity, you fish the shoebox you’ve been keeping under your bed out and open it.

inside there’s only three things so far: 

a copy of your graduation photo, a copy of johnny’s graduation photo, and the prom invite ticket that has jungwoo’s chicken scrawl on the back (he was technically your date, because johnny got proportioned by half the seniors and mark was too nervous to ask if you’d take him)

this is what you were talking about. this is what you want to spend summer doing.

you want to spend it remembering, gathering fragments of your life so far in your hometown with your bestfriends, so that when you move on you have a tangible piece of the memories

the reason you were keeping it a secret though was because.....even you had to admit.......this was a little much 

and you had built yourself a little bit of a hard shell so imagining telling the people you knew that this was your summer plan 

well, you could already hear johnny’s voice saying something like ‘hey, this isn’t a hallmark movie you sap and facetime exists. do you think im not gonna call you at 3 am from across the country like i do now anyway?’ 

you close the box and tap your fingers on the top.

tomorrow, i’ll start visiting all the important places.

your phone pings and it sound echoes through the otherwise empty library. 

a harsh shushing sound comes from the front desk and you quickly answer it, sliding down against one of the bookcases

you’d come here to see if you could find that old series you loved as a kid, the magic treehouse, it’s the books you and johnny fought over when you first met each other years ago

you abandon that though because poor mark sounds like he’s having a panic attack over the phone

“hey, you need to get over here - johnny is holding auditions for a guitarist since you said you didn’t want to do the band”

“ok, so what? it’s just auditions?”

mark’s pleading gets louder, “it’s auditions with JOHNNY - he thinks this is eurovision or something i don’t know please i can’t reign him in and jungwoo’s at his internship - i am dying here!”

you sigh, making it long so mark knows how annoyed you are

“put him on.”

mark’s voice drowns and johnny takes the phone from him

“what did i say with conspiring with them? we are shunning them for quitting on the band! what do you mean you had no other options? what do you mean my egomania is coming out? - anyway hey whats up?”

“stop torturing mark and all the poor kids that showed up to audition.”

“first of all, im not torturing anyone. that would be illegal and distasteful, im just giving my constructive criticism. second of all, if you want to give orders like that then let’s make this a fare trade off. come over and help me judge - i mean hold the auditions and then i will cease my so called ‘torturing’ ala my ‘criticizing’.”

you huff - fine, it’s one day out of the whole summer.

“ok. but you better have snacks.”

“do you think i wouldn’t provide refreshments? what kind of monster do you think i am?”

there’s more people than you expect showing up to audition for this band. half of them are just there to sweet talk johnny or mark,  but the others are all just. bad. 

you never knew how bad someone butcher playing an instrument, let alone a guitar, but you’ve had that eye opening experience today

“how many people left?”

you mutter, face first into your palms and looking up with happiness when mark says only one!

“hey, im jung jaehyun.”

you turn and see the boy from the bike, the one with the softest eyes you’ve ever seen, standing in the entry to johnny’s garage

he’s carrying his own guitar case - black leather and well worn but loved

“well jaehyun dude, i hope you can at least play the damn thing because i feel like no one in this town can!”

johnny groans and you straighten up a little as jaehyun comes closer

he sets himself up and you feel something inside your stomach turn when he bends down and you see a bit of the tanned skin of his back

“im not amazing, but i can play some of the classics.”

“wonderwall?” mark asks and johnny snips at him as you try to think of something to say, but suddenly....your brain is fuzzy

“play anything!” 

so jaehyun does, he plays, and he even sings and the fuzziness in your brain turns to white noise and the little drop in your stomach is a whole bundle of butterflies

you barely realize the johnny is already befriending jaehyun and mark is staring at him with those big, impressed eyes

when you get up and jaehyun smiles at you

“so what do you play?”

johnny throws an arm around your shoulder older brother style and rolls his eyes before you get a word in

“you’re actually taking their spot because they’re too busy to be in the band.”

something seems to cast a sad shadow over jaehyun’s features - “oh, you’re not going to play with us?”

words float through your head, none of which you can grasp onto, so you just shake it instead and let johnny ramble on about your so called betrayal

you look at your phone and of course it’s nearing ten and there’s no way you can go to any of the other places on your list so you motion to mark that you’re going to head home

“oh - i have to go too.”

jaehyun slings his guitar case over his shoulder, “but ill come by tomorrow for practice?”

johnny shoots him a big grin and then haggles all the social media jaehyun has out of him

you don’t know why you just don’t start walking - but somehow you end up leaving with jaehyun, making that left turn where you first passed each other

“do you live on this street?”

you jump a little as you nod, “yeah - i think i actually saw you yesterday. you were on your bike so you probably didn’t notice me.”

there’s a polite distance between you two, but jaehyun is smiling when he answers

“oh no, i definitely noticed you.”

you end up thinking about those words the same way you couldn’t stop thinking about his eyes 

except this time, instead of it lasting a day, the thought lasts nearly two and a half weeks

it seems jaehyun is doing a good job fitting in with your friends, considering you don’t get anymore calls from mark 

and you actually start to make progress on your summer project

you manage to get some ticket stubs from old movies, an old science project you did that’s still hanging on the walls of the highschool (open for summer classes), and pressed flowers from ontop of a hill where you almost break your elbow back when you were a freshman

you’re plunging yourself into your past, but weirdly enough every now and then you’ll remember that 

oh no, i definitely noticed you

the six little words make you feel giddier than whatever memento you’re seeking out to tuck into your shoebox

you try to tell yourself it’s just because jaehyun is new - he’s new and the memory of him isn’t old enough to try and find anything to represent him by 

and he kind of represents everything you’re nervous about - new places, new people, new friendships ...... the prospect of a new love

love? 

you look up at the sky as you swing back and forth on the playground you’ve come to collect something from for your memory box 

that’s ridiculous. i’ve had one conversation with him!

you swing your legs back and forth, slowing down and you think twice about jumping off when suddenly you feels someone gently push your back

the swing goes a little higher and you turn your head in surprise to see

“j-jaehyun?”

he smiles and his dimples greet you before he does

“i saw you on my way back from johnny’s.”

he gives you another soft push and you hear that fuzzy noise that always turns the gears in your brain when you try to say something around him

“is - is johnny being nice?”

is all you can muster and jaehyun laughs, the sound melodic but low, just the way the baritone of his voice is when he sang

“very nice, but he is a lot to handle sometimes.”

you kick your legs down and dig your heels into the grass a little, jaehyun grabs the two chains of the swings to help you stop it

when you turn you notice his bike is laying a couple of feet away and so is his guitar

“what about the band stuff?”

“johnny is trying to write songs and stuff, but actually mark is the one that i think has the talent for it.”

you can’t help but feel the corner of your mouth lift up a little, he already knows the two of them pretty well.

“what about you - do you write songs or music?”

jaehyun lifts his bike back up and you take the guitar case to help him

before you know it - you and him are walking side by side again 

“a little, but it’s more about playing the guitar for me. that’s the part that makes me happy.”

you play with your fingers behind your back, old nervous habits rising to the surface

“by the way - why did you not want to be part of the band? johnny said you were busy with something but you didn’t say what.”

you stop 

i should lie, make something up.

jaehyun stops too and the sounds of the bike wheels and footsteps float off into the air

but for some reason, i don’t want to lie. not to him.

“im......leaving after the summer, going to school in another place. so im spending my summer kind of.....im kind of cataloging this place. this town. i’m doing the whole put your memories in a shoebox thing which is so-”

“awesome! i think it’s awesome that you want a part of your home with you, sometimes people are way too excited to get away from their roots.”

you look at jaehyun, who returns the look with a comforting warmth you’ve never experienced before.

it’s a different comfort than the one you get from your friends or your family, it makes your heart beat flutter - slow for a second, then so fast you think your body can’t keep up

he starts walking again and you do too

the silence isn’t weird. it’s a conversation in it’s own way between your two bodies.

when you get to your house - you look at jaehyun again and you have two thoughts

one is that you should kiss him. because he looks so.....kissable.

the second, the one you ultimately choose, is to widen your eyes and go:

“promise you won’t tell the others about it though, they would not let me live it down.”

jaehyun laughs and hooks his pinkie with yours - his skin soft under the setting sun - “i promise.”

and after being caught up in thinking about jaehyun’s eyes, or the way he speaks, you find yourself in the same repeating cycle again

this time. it’s your regret. 

you should have chose option one, because it’s looking like another opportunity to kiss jung jaehyun is not coming any time soon.

and like the two times before, you throw yourself into your summer project to try and not think about it 

(although you do, multiple times throughout the day, at one point blushing at the image of what could have happened if you DID kiss him and then getting snapped at by the angry man at the local deli)

another couple of weeks pass and you swing by johnny’s because it’s a location on your summer memory list and also....

you are curious about how the band is going ...

and you kind of a little want to see jaehyun again......

you arrive and hear jungwoo’s voice to your surprise, followed by the sound of drums and johnny’s sharp “stop, stop, STOP!”

“jungwoo, what is going on - did working at samsung make you into a robot who can only produce code and not drum to save his life?”

“what do you know about drumming johnny? or coding? or anything in general?”

“hey watch the attitude, you’re embarrassing me in front of jaehyun.”

jungwoo snorts and you try to hide your own laugh but everyone turns to you just in time for you to hiccup it back

“ah - the traitor is here!” 

johnny sings and jaehyun gives him a soft elbow to the ribs

“what’s up?” 

mark smiles from his place at the keyboard and you cross your arms

“nothing, hows it going - book any shows? write an album yet?”

“actually, we did book a gig for your information”

johnny waltz his way from the microphone and to a stack of flyers from his couch

he hands you one and this time you do burst out into laughter

the flyer, pink and way over the top, is an invitation to johnny’s end of the summer party

well it’s actually his going away party his parents have planned for him, since he’s also leaving for school

“johnny - you didn’t book a gig. you’re playing your own party.”

“the parents are shelling out twenty dollars to each of us so money makes it a gig.”

you look at jaehyun who secretly rolls his eyes

“sure, sure. can i keep one of these?” 

you fold the flyer and slip it into your pocket, this will make a good addition to the shoebox

“oh are you going to put it in-”

jaehyun starts and you rush over, hand flying over his mouth as the three other people in the garage stare

“going to put it in......the trash. yes. going to throw it right out because really johnny did you use paint-”

johnny flips you off in the kindest, best friend way possible

you let go of jaehyun and throw him a look that he mouths an apology too

somehow, instead of leaving, you end up staying and listening to them practice

you consider it a break from your project and the day is filled with what you’d expect from all of them, laughter and jokes and banter that is only ok between the closest of people

when they finally finish practice and jungwoo and mark accept a gracious ride home from mr. suh 

you say you’ll be off too and jaehyun trots up right behind you, “ill walk with you.”

this time, you hear less of the fuzz in your head and can actually keep up a decent conversation without staring at jaehyun’s lips

you feel closer because of the time you spent today and you almost walk past your house until jaehyun points to the porch

“oh by the way. can i see what you have in the shoebox?”

you look over your shoulder at him, “like right now?”

he gives a casual shrug

“is that ok?”

and now jung jaehyun is standing in your room. well he’s standing in it and then he’s sitting on your bed and rummaging through some of the most personal memories you have.

his long fingers pulling out ticket stubs or notes you passed in class

he chuckles at the graduation photo of johnny and dangles yours over your head when he refuses to give it back 

you tackle him for it and he falls down against your sheets and you make the worst (or arguably best) mistake of your life

when you straddle his hips and rich out to grab it

only to look down and see him splayed open like the pages of a beautiful book

and you remember your regret

it makes your head spin, but you watch in slow motion as the photo falls from between his fingers and you lean down to catch it, but jaehyun presses up and catches your mouth with his.

it’s sloppy, awkward - but only for the first few seconds - until you can both adjust yourselves from your position and do it right and then it is 

astonishing

because it feels like you’re kissing someone you’ve been kissing for years. decades. millennia's. eons. 

it feels like you and jaehyun have been doing this since the big bang.

since humans first came to exist. 

since, gosh you don’t know, since pangea freaking broke apart.

you make out for so long that you lose track of time and it gets late to the point where the darkness of the summer almost makes you ask him to stay over

but jaehyun is just so mannerly that he slips out the back door of your house with a final kiss and a promise to call

which he follows up on earlier than you expect, showing up on your doorstep to take you out for breakfast

only to end up with you two back in your room an hour later, kissing again, and again, and with more hands and less of his shirt or yours.

the only thing that unglues you from him is his phone ringing for what must be the tenth time

“it’s johnny”

you breath against jaehyun’s neck finally

“how do you know?”

“only he calls ten times in a row.”

and like your summer project, you don’t tell your friends about what’s going on between you two

jaehyun says it’s kind of hard to hide the obvious evidence on his body - but you tell him to say it was your other neighbor, or someone from another town

jaehyun agrees just because you pull the doe eye trick on him and he really is learning he can’t say no to that or to you in most situations

but everytime before and after band practice - he’s with you

sometimes he joins you on your little visits to the places still on your lists

when you tell him the sentimental value behind them, you get a little fidgety because being vulnerable is hard 

but jaehyun listens and he says that each memory of yours he gets to watch you relive, helps him learn something about you

you don’t say it out loud - but hearing that makes you want to cry and kiss him and cry again 

an other times, you two don’t do anything heartwarming or special, you just roll around with him, tangled up in one until he has to go

with each day, summer comes closer to 

and end but you fall deeper into each other at a pace that might be alarming if it was any other two humans but the both you

and before you know it - it’s the day of johnny’s end of summer slash going away party 

jaehyun is supposed to be there from like nine in the morning but he stops at your place before he bikes over

kissing your forehead he drops something in your palm

you open it to see his guitar pick 

“won’t you need this for when you play?”

“i’m using my backup. i just thought you might want to put that one in your shoebox........since it could remind you of me......”

he flushes and you bite back your lip, part of you is happy because he’s just so cute it isn’t fair but the other is coming to the daunting idea that 

soon enough - im leaving too, will jaehyun just be another memory to me?

instead of dwelling on it, you peck him again and ask, 

“ill see you at the party?”

the party is most definitely a johnny suh party

the food is amazing, everyone on the planet is invited, and johnny is wearing something so bright it beats out the sun

when you arrive, his mother spends half an hour asking you to take care of him when he finally leaves and you don’t remind her that you’re going to two different places

you don’t see jaehyun or mark or jungwoo around - you assume they’re practicing somewhere for the performance while johnny is juggling both front lead singer and host

the party is fun - it really is - but the words “going away” somehow still make you a little sick

you’re about to escape to somewhere a little quieter, when you hear someone tap the mic on the makeshift stage in johnny’s backyard

you see him - and the rest of the band - gather on as johnny introduces them and shouts excitedly that this song they’re going to perform, written by keyboardist mark, is all about new beginnings!

jaehyun finds you in the crowd, a secret little smile on his lips before the music starts and to your surprise - and probably everyone elses - they actually do pretty good

the lyrics are so very mark, but johnny brings a flare to the way he sings it

jungwoo seems to have remembered how much he adores drumming again and the way jaehyun looks playing guitar is so enticing that you can’t help but feel a little pride in the fact that you’ve been tasting all of that for most of the summer

the sick feeling in your stomach turns into excitement which turns into just pure enjoyment as you watch your friends and your boyfriend up there having fun

when it’s over and they hop down to mingle back into the rest of the party, you really can’t help yourself and throw your arms around jaehyun

you kiss him - which earns a gasp from mark, a half smirk from jungwoo, and a loud clearing of his throat from johnny

you and jaehyun admit what’s been going on and when johnny just whistles you ask him if he’s not mad

“even if i was mad, you would still keep liking each other right - so what’s the point?” 

you hug johnny, and mark, and jungwoo, and like nothing has changed you all fall back into the swing of it

the comfort of being around each other

when you five are the last people in johnny’s messy background you finally decide to tell them all about your summer project

“i knew you’d all say it was lame so i-”

“hey hey hey - it isn’t lame. it’s not what i expect but i get why you’d want to do it.”

johnny pats your shoulder and you feel jaehyun’s hand on the small of your back

it’s the kind of moment you want to never end. 

really, you just want this summer to never end.

but when it does - when the day comes for the temperature to drop and for you to be on your way to a new place

you feel the sadness come in a big wave

johnny, mark, jungwoo, and jaehyun all come to say goodbye and you hold the shoebox in your hands - now heavy and filled to the brim with all your memories

before you say it though, each of them adds something

jungwoo drops his samsung internship ID into it

mark places the paper he wrote the draft of the lyrics to the song they performed at the party into it

and johnny chucks a burned CD version of it into the mix

finally, turning to jaehyun, you take in a deep breath

“i know the distance will be big so if you want to break up and-”

he kisses you before you can finish your sentence and slips a small box that you don’t open until you’re already in your new dorm

inside is a small bracelet, engraved on the inside are the words

“i definitely noticed you. it was love at first sight”

years later - jaehyun says those words again

as he’s reading his vows 

and you’re feeling the fuzziness, the butterflies, the comforting warmth, everything like a tsunami of all the things that are you and jaehyun

and when johnny shows up to present the rings to you two

they’re in that old shoebox 

two little bands at the bottom of all those memories

at the reception, you lean over and whisper to your now husband

“where did you find that old thing by the way?”

jaehyun nuzzles his lips against the cusp of your ear as you watch jungwoo and mark make fools of themselves on the dance floor 

“under the bed, where you put everything you care about.”

#WELL ! #i really took way too long to write this but just........alot of feelings at once #nct scenarios #nct 127 scenarios #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun au #nct au #nct 127 au #jaehyun #nct #nostolgic au #jaehyun imagines #nct imagines

[samisanaveragewriter]

Confessions from the MHA Boys

Tenya Iida

hes been pinning on you for a while and when i say a while its like a while while 

to the point where it got his ass handed to him while in training 

thats when he decides that he has to confess to you 

just so if you don’t feel the same way he can move on

mans is one of the rich guys in class 

but he’s secretly really into that romantic shit 

so will make you homemade chocolates with really expensive ingredients 

also a letter written in the prettiest fountain pen  

ngl its basically a long winded rant about how he noticed he liked you 

and since he gets to class hella early he’ll place them on your desk. 

the note probably tells you to meet him after school for a proper chat 

throughout the day this poor guy is sHAKING with nerves because he asked in that note to just act normal so he hAS NO IDEA

at the end of the day he waits for you 

and then when you tell him you feel the same his face lights up like a goddamn christmas tree 

he’s just so happy 

will take your hand and kiss it because he doesn’t do pda

will ask you on a date to

Izuku Midoriya

listen he really really likes you 

he has a whole ass notebook dedicated to your all your habits and drawing you 

its when tsu accidentally finds him in the middle of drawing you that she has to push him to ask you out 

poor bakugou is probably annoyed over how much midoriya mutters about you

anyway 

he probably has to ask for advice 

he researches shojo mangas to figure out how to confess 

the ones that call his attention though is the simple ones 

i mean he is a simple guy himself so it kinda makes sense 

will confess to you after class 

he’s red the entire time he tells you that he likes you 

he doesn’t really stutter more-so he won’t look you in the eye 

homeboy knew what he was doing 

yeah he’s a nervous wreck but he will put on a confident face for you

will probably hug you, lift you, and spin you around if you say yes 

he looks at you like you hung the sky, stars, and moon 

asks you if you wanna go somewhere 

he just wants to spend time with you 

Shoto Todoroki 

he’s not in tune with his emotions as much as he wants to be 

so whenever he sees you and feels his chest begin to tighten 

he just assumes he hates you with all his guts 

its when he talks to the squad that he realizes that maybe he doesn’t hate you 

its uraraka specifically that tells him he has a crush on you 

poor baby thought he was gonna crush your hand 

anyway

he goes up to you at lunch and tells you as such 

no grand gesture or anything 

a simple “I like you, can I take you out?” 

the date however 

that date is something pulled out of shojo manga (i mean he reads it so he knows) 

it’s much easier to understand his emotions on the date than the confession itself 

will hold your hand the entire time 

at the end of the date he’ll tell you he had fun and that he hopes you did too 

will ask you on another one right after 

it takes one more date for him to cement himself as your boyfriend 

he gives you the sweetest (its sloppy but you’re his first) kiss 

he’s just so whipped 

Katsuki Bakugou

this man is upset that he likes you

not in the “why them” sense 

but the “why now?” 

he feels like he has a lot to grow before he’s someone he’s proud of 

when i tell you he thinks about it for WEEKS 

he just isn’t sure if he’d be ready to have someone along with him on becoming a better person and a hero

after a while he just makes up his mind

so he sends you a text asking you to meet him in the park 

so you go and he’s holding an orange rose (he spent all night researching flower meanings but he will never tell you that)

gives it to you straight 

he likes you, he wants to be with you, but he’s not at his best rn 

if you’re willing to give him a chance he’s ready to work for it 

on the inside he’s excited if you say yes 

im talking screaming and running around 

on the outside he’s like “I knew you would say yes” 

is really happy that you like him bc if you like him at his worst 

things can only go up from there. 

will take you to the mall after 

just to chill out and talk 

he’s just really happy you like him and hes gonna do his best to make you proud

Ejirou Kirishima 

He’s one that knows whats going on and how to deal with it 

probably the only one who will give you a normal confession 

he has it all planned out though 

mina helped but most if it was his!!! idea!!! 

it’s a whole ass day 

he takes you up hiking and then sets up this really nice picnic 

he made all the little sandwiches and homemade lemonade 

y’all talk about everything and anything up in that little spot 

dont!!! forget!! rock!! painting!!

once the sun starts setting he pulls out the big guns 

he goes on this small rant about how you’re so cute and shit 

and how whenever you’re around he feels at peace with himself 

and how he wants to hold your hand 

he ends it off with “Well, whaddya say? Date me?”

ofc you say yes

he’s so happy!! 

please let this cinnamon roll kiss you 

he asks too the consent KING 

“can i kiss you?”

your room now has a rock with the date 

kiri has a matching rock with the same date 

he’s just so happy 

he parades you around to his friends calling you ‘his s/o’

the sweetest please 

Denki Kaminari 

This man’s affection starts off when he send you memes 

and you send him one back 

he’s whipped beyond belief 

he jokingly asks you to go to the arcade with him one day and you say yes 

he actually sets up a date so that both of you could go to the arcade  

and also a movie

will say no one wanted to go see the new movie and asks you to come with 

so both of you go 

and its a blast 

he tries to win you a teddy bear on the claw machine but at can’t 

you win it for him and he’s gonna protect it with his life 

names the bear after a butchered way to say your name 

he’s really nervous tho and you notice

you ask him what’s up and he tells you that he’s just really intimidated by how pretty you look under the neon lights 

he asks you if yall can do this together again 

not as friends tho 

as maybe a couple on a date 

you tell him why wait 

and you guys go play more on the machines 

this time he manages to rack up enough points to get you a bigger teddy bear off the prize table 

you name the bear zappy after kaminari’s quirk 

once both of you have to go he’ll be back to his normal suave self 

kisses your hand as a goodbye 

once he’s home he short circuits out of his excitement and happiness  

#tenya iida x reader #iida tenya x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #ejirou kirishima x reader #kirishima ejirou x reader #denki kaminari x reader #kaminari dekni x reader #bnha imagines #mha imagines #mha headcanons #bnha headcanons #reader imagine #my hero imagines #comfort imagines #confession imagines