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andrewwtca · 1 year

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hello, I am andrewwtca and this is my self-indulgent sunflower seeds analysis

if you don't know, I wrote this sunnflower fanfic called sunflower seeds in the rearview mirror and it is my pride and joy! long story short, Sunny and Basil go on a road trip together and Shit Gets Fucked Up. and I put a lot of metaphors, symbolism, all that jazz in it. like I said, I am so very proud of it,,,

so this, is my analysis of... drum roll please... Sunny's horrible grip on his memory!

my attempt at an introduction

Chapter 1

A part of him wishes he had a CD to keep them both from going crazy in silence but he hasn’t bought one in four years and he isn’t about to bring nursery rhymes with him. The radio signal couldn’t be that bad, right?

(the radio signal is indeed not that bad, Sunny. it's a shame you'll never use it because I completely forget about it)

Sunny has a very selective memory - he's not at all conscious of what he is choosing to remember and forget, much like how he didn't want to forget the incident.

he is also very, very aware that he has missed out on a lot, saying that while everyone around him grew up, he is still a child with nursery rhymes. Sunny has no intentions to 'grow up' however, choosing to remain in this mindset. even when Basil confronts him later on in the bathtub at their motel, saying he's still a child, Sunny makes no direct motion to prove anything else is true, other than saying he's sixteen.

Sunny is aware of the time that he's lost and the time he continues to lose - the first step to gaining that time back is to figure out where he is.

what time is it, anyway?

Chapter 2

Basil looks at the corner of his eye and Sunny settles on the passenger side, glad Basil can't stare at his eye patch. "The Boy Is Mine, Brady and Monica. I think it's popular in our town but nobody has talked to... I-It's popular on the radio. Been topping... Topping charts. The announcer always goes on rants about how popular it is.”

Chapter 2

"Well… Oh, Disney released some new movies! Remember how we used to watch The Little Mermaid under the covers in your living room?"

...

But before he got rid of it, Sunny would always invite his friends to come watch because his set was the best out of all of theirs. They would play video games on Kel's Genesis, which he would lug every weekend, or watch whatever movies they could get their hands on.

When The Little Mermaid was released, the whole group was obsessed with it. That was overtaken by when Aladdin released, but the story about the girl who wishes she could walk on the world struck a chord with them all.

...

"Let's see, Disney released... Lion King and Hercules? I want to think you've seen them but if you haven't... Left, and you don't have a set, how could you have?"

Sunny is struggling to get a grip on time, so he begins to take out specific moments in his memory that references such events. he doesn't do this for the rest of the trip, just at the beginning: he needs to know where he is, what time it is.

he needs to know where in time and space he is, because he's had an ego death or something, his entire identity has just been retconned or something

for the rest of the trip, Sunny does not think about the song or the promise of movies (on that note, Basil doesn't bring them up either, but I'm giving him a pass... for now). his memory doesn't find a need for anything time-relevant anymore.

he knows what the most popular song is now, as he was worried about music before he left. and he was able to not only hear Basil talk, but got to catch up on something brought up. simple and clean problem and resolution.

he knows he's missed out and it left him feeling left out; now, with the promise of being included once again, Sunny no longer feels the need to focus on the names of anything, the dates of anything. his memory has given him an outing as he has solved the first question: what time is it, anyway?

now to the more pressing issue: Basil.

sharing and losing fixations, sharing and losing memories

Sunny is prone to get fixated on things (autistic Sunny supremacy) easily, and those things can change the very thought process of his brain... so, what happens when Basil (re-)introduces Sunny to Greek mythology?

(this is in no way me just projecting how much I like Greek mythology onto them, I swear)

Chapter 5

Things makeshift Greek tragedies have that real Greek tragedies don't:

Basil and Sunny, that's for starters. They don't have an angel of Gaea and an angel of Helios, turn against their own and fly towards each other, burn their wings and leave their nests just to hold each other (or try to);

Chapter 11

“Yeah.” Basil nods and it’s enough to draw Sunny's eye up from the water. Basil doesn’t turn, doesn’t run, and the two of them stare at each other. Study each other, like artists. Maybe they are artists. They created a mess. They created a tragedy. A play—

Chapter 15

Sunny won't let death be how his story ends. He's not a fucking tragedy. He gets his fucking happy ending.

Sunny begins to think in terms of tragedies. he begins to thinks in terms of there is someone bigger tugging at his strings... but why? Sunny knows little about Greek mythology, other than the stories he and Basil used to read as kids, so why get so fixated on it?

it's a horrible attempt to stop the descent of forgetting.

Sunny, to a subconscious level, is aware that there are blanks in his memory. to a subconscious level, he is aware that he keeps missing out... after all, that's the reason why he came.

Chapter 1

The whole point of this is to forget. Or, at least that’s how Basil pitched it to him. And it’s a pretty worthwhile idea, so Sunny is going to do just that. He’s going to sit in the front seat of the old car with a faint scent from the swinging car freshener, and he’s going to think about the street lights flickering over him and he’s going to forget, even if it’s for a bit.

with the intentions of forgetting, Sunny came on this trip - he wants to rekindle with Basil, yes, but how can you do that when there's so much weighing you down? so, Sunny lets himself forget.

oh dear. Sunny, that is a horrible mistake.

Sunny WENT ON THIS TRIP TO FORGET. and then HE BECOMES SHOCKED WHEN HE DOES. oh foolish one, why did you sow?

nonetheless, Sunny must face the consequences of his attempt to forget, directly after going through the biggest fight of his life as a consequence of forgetting (are any of you noticing a cycle?), and it's that by forgetting all the hurtful things, he can barely hold on to the good things.

because existing is all of it. it's the bad, it's the good, and if you reject one, you reject the other.

Chapter 15

...until they’re in the light and running and they can

live.

Live with their sorrow. Live with their hope. Live with their anger. Live with their love.

this realization is not one Sunny has right away. no, we have some pressing issues, such as forgetting: so, Sunny goes on this trip to feel happy (it's literally in the description of the fic) so how is he going to remember?

well, he must trick his brain to associating the bad things with the good.

Basil, through all their conflict, all their hurt, is a good thing in Sunny's life.

Chapter 8

He feels his heart shatter and he whispers, “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Basil.”

so, to remember, he begins to associate hardships with something Basil likes: Greek mythology. tragedies, specifically. even when it's something small, Sunny is tricking himself to remember. he's tricking himself to remember the hardships, so that he can live once again.

when things get hard, he wants to escape. so when things get hard, he remembers Basil, Basil's interests, all things that make him happy. and you know what, it works! it works until he is confronted with the horrible truth that he has only remembered a fraction of what has happened.

acceptance

Chapter 2

"I think... There's these traveling stops," Basil says.

Chapter 12

Sunny studies the photo. There’s a small brown building, a rest stop probably, in the way of the sky in brilliant shades of blue. The sun is blurry and Sunny tries to remember where they were but it’s not getting any clearer. It’s like the closer he gets, the more obscured it is. Remembering the truth wasn’t hard—once the pieces were there, he just had to glue them together in order and accept it. There’s nothing for him to accept here, everything so blurred, so obscured, so off.

(don't kill the messenger y'all but I think Basil went to a traveling stop, I know, shocking)

Sunny is not going to be able to remember this moment. there are hundreds of other moments like these, that he just will not be able to remember. he was able to trick his brain before to remember, to remember all the bad things, but there's only so much that it can do. some memories, aren't hidden behind a key, waiting to be unlocked.

some memories, are gone. they were not suppressed, they were just not kept. it's almost similar to the final sequences of the game itself, Sunny going down memory lane: Sunny forgot all these good memories, because he would not accept the bad ones either.

except, Sunny needed those memories to face the underlying truth of Mari's death and his role in it. Sunny needs these memories to move on, to continue to exist, not to actually accept anything.

this is no longer a consequence of his actions—this now feels like a consequence of his existence. this now feels like a constant, that there will always be something he'll forget, there will always be something he can't hold on to...

but.

Chapter 10

“Me?”

“You brought yourself here.”

“I…” Sunny looks around.

Omori had wanted to send him to the pits of his mind, where he could rest.

But Sunny resisted.

Sunny did not succumb.

Sunny is a boy of cycles. he is in this cycle of forgetting and remembering. but there's another cycle, one we don't give him enough credit for: hardship and resistance.

something bad happens. and somehow, eventually, one day, Sunny will resist it. he will resist the idea that this is now his entire life. one day, Sunny will face this hardship with shaky arms, and he will play his music once again.

Sunny has accepted his hardships. it's driven him crazy, it's made him want nothing more than to rest. but he does not.

Sunny has accepted what plagues him and he carries on.

Chapter 8

And so, the curtain draws, and Sunny raises the bow, and they play again.

you who resembles I, or something like that

we, of course, cannot talk about Sunny's selective memory, Sunny's cycles, anything about post-incident Sunny, without talking about Omori. he is an extension of Sunny's being: he is the desire to rest, the desire to hide away, the desire to forget.

yet at the very end, Sunny has a chance to forget, and Omori doesn't let him.

Sunny has experienced prolonged gaps in his memory, filled in with fantasy: the driving lesson and the car chase are examples of this. and he hasn't just experienced gaps, his brains had filled in those gaps with poorly scribbled in memories, in order to convince Sunny to hide away.

Omori does not trust Basil.

Chapter 10

“It wasn’t even you! It was that damn flower boy! It’s always him, it’s always him ruining fucking everything!” Omori regains his balance and direction and lurches forward again for Sunny, this time tackling him to the ground.

it's safe to say that Omori feels a lot more than just distrust towards Basil (gasp).

Chapter 10

Omori sits up and pulls his legs to his chest. He looks off to the side and the sneer is back in his voice, his vulnerability lost to the void. “I can’t believe you. You still love him so much.”

...

Omori presses his weight into Sunny’s abdomen and growls. “You are an idiot. You look so fucking stupid with that stupid lovesick look as if you’ve forgotten everything. As if, as if it means nothing!”

so when Omori has given Sunny two outings before, two chances to escape to a different world and leave... so why, when (it's safe to assume that if Sunny didn't intervene, Basil would not have ended up alright) he could've finally gotten rid of Basil, why would Omori be the one to bring Sunny back?

Chapter 15

Across the street, Sunny could swear he sees a boy who looks just like him in white, gesturing wildly.

well I'm not going to actually answer that because like I really want to write a part two for this AU, so you may be asking. 'Andrew why did you even bother to write all of that than?'

WELL THAT'S BECAUSE I JUST CAN'T TALK ABOUT SUNNYY WITHOUT BRINGING UP OMORI, YOU FOOL! but!

Chapter 10

Letting out a groan of frustration, Omori frees his right hand and swings with the object still in it. It cuts through Sunny’s eye patch and a bit of the skin underneath, and the patch flitters to the ground right as the knife clatters to the ground.

Omori stares right into Sunny’s eye.

hmm... I wonder... what could this possibly mean...

I have more planned for him!!! stay tuned

the end(?)

I have a lot I can say about this story because I just. it is my pride, my joy, and it is my child! I worked very hard on this so I should be allowed to write long winding essays about it!!!

there's so much more I can say about Sunny's memory, but I really want to write a second part!!! maybe this will motivate me to actually do it... (hah. that's funny, Andrew)

Sunny still has a long way to go, but he's acknowledged his gaps and he's acknowledged that it won't all be fixed with time. he'll have to keep working to make it better... until then, let's give him a minute to be warm with his boycrush

if you made it all the way down here, thank you for reading! please keep your local neighborhood Sunny happy and don't let him go on road trips!!!

#literary analysis is my special interest #and so is sunny omori he is my little blorbo #omori #sunny omori #basil omori #sunnflower #sunny x basil #andrew's essays

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0423s-archived · 2 years

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-ˏˋ HOW SUNOO CHEERS YOU UP ˊˎ

✧.* gn!reader ; 0.5k words ; fluff, comfort ; mentions of food

✧.* requested by anon ; masterlist ; taglist

✧.* first fic on the new blog! wrote this one pretty quickly so it isn't my most sophisticated piece but feedback is encouraged and appreciated! also, my requests are open in case you would like to read something similar for another member. my taglist is open as well in case you wanna get regular updates every time i post a new fic! please enjoy~

✧.* sunoo is always able to tell when you're upset, even if you go above and beyond to hide your feelings from him. sometimes, he can feel it in the air, other times, he can see it on your face, and some other times, it happens right in front of him.

✧.* he has a tendency to get very obsessed with cheering you up. so much so to the point where he starts getting upset if he isn't able to make you feel better. obviously, he hates seeing you in a bad mood, because he wants nothing but joy and happiness for you.

✧.* sunoo is big on communication. open up to him. tell him what's bothering you. get down to every nitty gritty detail so that you come out of it feeling completely satisfied and burden free. sunoo could listen to you rant for hours without a single complaint. not because he would do anything for you (which he claims he would but is still up for debate) but more so because he's mad for you. he just doesn't know what he's supposed to be mad about, and you telling him helps him justify his own annoyance.

✧.* he never invalidates your feelings. he always listens to you and understands the unspoken meaning behind your words. he knows that sometimes you feel "stupid" for being upset about something that isn't conventionally upsetting. but he always reminds you that even if others might think you're overreacting, you are still allowed to feel the way you do. in this way, he manages to lessen the guilt you feel for being upset.

✧.* not only does sunoo listen to you properly, but he always has words of reassurance ready to sprinkle on you. he doesn't get too philosophical, but he does try to help you see the bigger picture. while he wants you to have autonomy over your own decisions, he does try to steer your thoughts in the right direction, mostly away from self depreciation.

✧.* now sunoo knows that simply getting things off your chest isn't always enough. so, in the case that it is not, he comes prepared with enough reinforcements to ensure you won't even second guess tossing the problem in the past.

✧.* sunoo is a staunch believer in cuddle therapy. the perfect ending to any venting is sealing the deal with a big, warm, and tight bear hug that never fails to give you a feel for how much he truly loves and cares about you. he cancels all his plans to spend an entire afternoon bundled up underneath a soft blanket with you, legs tangled together, switching between being the big spoon and little spoon.

✧.* sometimes there will be a movie playing. other times he'll have your favorite playlist buzzing in the background. sometimes, there'll be neither, just you both silently enjoying the serene ambiance of each other's company.

✧.* every so often he'll plant an unsuspecting kiss on your face and grin widely as he watches the action register in your mind. then you would do the same to him, catching him off guard, and thereby initiating a cute little kissy contest.

✧.* another way he likes to cheer you up is by buying you something yummy to eat. your favorite snacks, desserts, drinks- whatever you've been craving, he surprises you with some of it. there's nothing like some comfort food to warm your heart up.

#ivy ∘°∘♡∘°∘ writes #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen sunoo #sunoo imagines #sunoo scenarios #sunoo x reader #sunoo fluff #kim sunoo #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop x reader #kpop fluff

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streetlights-all-turn-blue · 5 months

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About the things Paul writes feeling true - that was what I meant, you put in into better words. It's relatable. My dad had the Sounds of Silence album too! I remember going through his records and seeing that one. I might have listened to it, but it's been so long since I've been able to listen to any vinyl. (And the marrying thing ... I might not have honestly thought I would marry him but my friend and I were still super into The Monkees and dreamed about being with Peter and Mike, so ... I feel that, haha.) As far as Beatles albums ... my favorites are Revolver, Magical Mystery Tour, Abbey Road & Let It Be. I have good memories of all of them. Abbey Road & Let It Be were on the same tape someone made for our family when I was growing up, and we played it a lot when we were doing chores, so whenever I hear those albums I feel like I want to clean up ... do you have any music like that? Albums or songs that make you feel like you have to do something in particular?

Do you have any favorite holiday albums/songs or films? My mom was obsessed with Christmas stuff growing up so I'm kind of burnt out on a lot of it. I like chill instrumental holiday music for the most part, but I also like some of the rock/oldies songs. My stepmom used to do a thing where everyone in the house picked a movie that would get packed away with the Christmas decorations, so we could only watch it at that time of year. She and my dad even put their own movies in there. Mine was Yellow Submarine! They even put a yellow sub ornament on their tree for me every year.

Hope you've had a good Thursday! 🌼

I love that your family had Sounds of Silence on vinyl when you were growing up! Do you feel like your musical taste was very influenced by your parents? I feel like there are threads of my parents’ preferences in my taste, like my dad loves The Who and The Beach Boys and we had the soundtrack to American Graffiti playing on the record player constantly. My mom is a big classical/classical adjacent fan and I still listen to that music a lot and grew up doing violin and piano and singing in chorus.

Abbey Road and Rubber Soul i think are my favorite Beatles albums but I also really love A Hard Day’s Night and Help! I definitely have albums that remind me of doing specific things - when one of my friends from growing up got her drivers license we drove around blasting REM and so I always feel like i should go on a drive when i hear them.

I like holiday music a lot and particularly holiday music that’s on the more classical side. Pop holiday music is fun but i don’t really choose to listen to it - do the holiday songs that Simon & Garfunkel did count here? I really love listening to them and their songs Comfort and Joy and Star Carol, and their Silent Night layered over the news clips. My favorite holiday album is probably one called Songs of Joy and Peace by Yo-Yo Ma. He plays the cello with some popular artists like James Taylor and does several versions of Dona Nobis Pacem with the various instrumentalists that are all unique and pretty. I also like listening to Vivaldi’s Four Seasons a lot during the holidays for some reason! I like your holiday movie tradition! I think we watched The Sound of Music a lot at the holidays while growing up? I am not sure if it was just playing or whether my parents picked this!

Thanks for chatting - hope you had a good weekend!

#srs23

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wizkiddx · 3 years

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first time the reader falls asleep on harry and he’s all scared and nervous and tom is like ugh

im sorry this has been in my inbox for lit weeks and weeks, but I just failed my exam and needed to write something fluffy!!

(not proofread or any sort of good)

//////////

It had been a long day, well more like night and day, for Y/n. Coming off the back of a night shift, to go straight to her new boyfriend's event was just plain long. Of course, she absolutely had leapt at the chance when Harry had offered for her to come to the brother's trust screening - that sort of experience isn’t one anybody would just pass up. The whole afternoon had simply been so heartwarming- but particularly just chatting with all the guests, especially seeing the way the girls had been pining and fawning over Harry (and his other brothers too). It was also just a nice opportunity to spend time with Harry's family, having only been together two months they were still in the getting-to-know phase. Given his closeness to his eldest brother, Y/n was very familiar to Tom and the shining Hollywood persona had worn off to what simply was a golf-obsessed 20 something-year-old.

But Y/n took great joy in spending time with Sam that day. He always seemed to be working, whether in Scotland or in the pub kitchen more locally, so chucking the bags of popcorn at each other to set up the cinema, was particularly enjoyable. Moreso as he told embarrassing stories of Harry throughout.

Still, after having watched Tom’s new movie, during which Harry couldn’t help himself but fill in little anecdotes from filming; and after the meet-and-greet with countless photos; Y/n was glad when Nikki shooed everyone out. Since Tom and Harry lived together, all three of them got the same ‘Uber Exec’- Tom’s paying ofc. Battersea cinema to Kingston at rush hour wasn’t exactly a ‘nip home’ situation, in fact, it was more like an hour and a half of standstill London traffic.

As soon as the driver had arrived, Tom had got an urgent call from his manager, forcing Y/n and Harry to be silent - watching never-ending glass-fronted office blocks go past. Harry was sat on the left window seat, his arm wrapped around Y/n who leant slightly into his side, while Tom was on her other side - phone pressed to his ear as he furrowed his brow, trying to get his head around all of Andrews instructions.

It must’ve been around half an hour that Tom was on the phone, which once he hung up sighed heavily, making Harry look over at him and chuckle.

“Andrew’s saying that-“ Tom quickly muted himself, then much more quietly whispering a little apology. Confused, Harry furrowed his eyebrows, watching Tom look at the girl in the middle as if he were scared of her. Noticing Harry’s obliviousness, Tom’s expression morphed into a little smirk. “You’re so whipped bro.” Tom whispered.

“What I’m n-“ Before he got any further, Harry looked down at Y/n and what he saw made his eyes practically bug out his head. Her head was tucked firmly into his side, hair falling over her face as her whole upper body bobbed along to the motion of the taxi.

“What do I do!?” Tom scoffed in response, laughing at how clueless his brother was. This was Harry’s first ‘serious’ relationship, Tom had never seen him so infatuated and golden-retriever-esque with anyone else.

“You do nothing bro. She’s obviously comfortable.”

With a quiet exhale, Harry nodded, a little grin slowly growing on his face as he squeezed her into his side just that little bit more. Ignoring his elder brothers smugness, Harry turned all his attention on to Y/n as she almost purred, nestling her head deeper into his shoulder. With careful intent, Harry reached up with his free arm to ever-so-gently tucked the rogue bits of hair behind her ear. The lovesick smile, making Tom roll his eyes, shaking his head and looking the other way - for fear anymore cringe would make him actually throw up.

This wasn’t the first time he’d seen her asleep, there had been a couple of occasions where she’d stayed over after ‘activities’. But she would always be gone by the time Harry woke because of work and it had never been so innocent. He hadn’t been oblivious to how exhausted she was either, having been working all night and not getting any downtime before the event. Actually, Harry had felt a bit awful for making her come to this thing and sacrifice her sleep, even if she had been keen to come too. Now though, he would be lying if he said he’d regretted bringing her along… if it meant that they wouldn’t have had this moment in the car.

If being ‘whipped’ for his girl, also meant she felt comfortable and safe enough with him to sleep on his shoulder, Harry would embrace it every single day.

taglist: @crossyourpeter @hallecarey1

#harry holland #harry Holland fluff #harry holland imagine #harry holland x y/n #harry holland x reader #tom holland

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bellasgreensweater · 3 years

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✨Why I Think Bella Swan Is On The Autism Spectrum ✨

In this post I’m going to talk about why I personally believe that Bella Swan is autistic. As an autistic person myself, I really relate to Bella and I see a lot of autistic traits in her.

Disclaimer: This is just a headcanon- I don’t think Stephenie Meyer intentionally wrote Bella as autistic, and she or the movie producers never confirmed it, so I’m not saying to everyone that she is CONFIRMED to be autistic and that every one has to see her that way, I’m just saying that I personally think she is, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Autistic people hardly have any representation in the media, and with the representation that we do have, it is almost always stereotypical, inaccurate and offensive. You do not have to agree with me on this, but just please be respectful in the comments and don’t hate :)

Ok let’s go:

1. She always felt different from everyone/she felt like nobody truly understood her and that she never really understood anyone either: this is what basically all autistic people feel, myself included. Feeling like nobody understands the way your brain works and the way you see the world. (And this is true, because autistic people do see the world differently than non- autistic people and autistic peoples brains are wired differently from non- autistic brains). Bella mentions this multiple times in the books and movies, at one point in the first book in the car with Edward, she tells him that she thinks he can’t read her mind because they’re a probably a glitch in her brain and that it’s not like other people’s. There is also this quote from the 1st chapter of twilight which sums up how she feels: “ Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forced to admit that I was lying to myself. It wasn’t just physically that I’d never fit in. And if I couldn’t find a niche in a school with three thousand people, what were my chances here? I didn’t relate well to people my age. Maybe the truth was that I didn’t relate well to people, period. Even my mother, who I was closer to than anyone else on the planet, was never in harmony with me, never on exactly the same page. Sometimes I wondered if I was seeing the same things through my eyes that the rest of the world was seeing through theirs. Maybe there was a glitch in my brain”.

2. Her motor skills: She’s constantly tripping over her own feet, has bad balance, doesn’t realize that she’s walking into things, constantly dropping things ect, a common thing for autistic people is to have poor motor skills and find it hard to navigate their body.

Another disclaimer about autism: not ever autistic person is the exact same, every autistic person expresses their autism in a slightly different way, for example, some autistic people are overly sensitive to sound, and some are under-sensitive to it, these are just the specific things I’ve noticed for Bella in this post, it’s not supposed to be a generalization of autism in any way! :)

3. Social disinterest and difficultly: all throughout her childhood and her time in forks, she wasn’t very interested in making friends or hanging out or going to parties, and she found that she could never make friends with someone easily, she just never fully clicked with someone. She did have some very nice friends in forks, however she never related to them too well or was very attached to them.

4. Dresses for comfort and not fashion: Bella typically dresses in what feels most comfortable for her, not what is the most fashionable thing, this is a common thing with autism. A lot of autistic people like myself are quite sensitive to clothing and fabric and will not tolerate uncomfortable clothing.

5. Limited interests/special interests: Bella doesn’t really have many interests, but the ones she does have, she’s very passionate about. A special interest is an autism-specific term used to describe interests and hobbies that autistic people have that are very important to them. They help regulate emotions, calm people down, provide escapism ect. Autistic people can hyper fixate on these interests for hours and hours and not get bored, they can get so engrossed that they forget to do basic tasks to take care of themselves like drinking or going to the bathroom. These interests can last for years, sometimes a lifetime and they are very important to autistics. Bella swans special interests would be reading, wuthering heights, and vampires. Bella says in midnight sun that she has loved reading all her life and it is one of the few things that bring her intense joy. She said she could read for hours at a time and would try to sneak books into her lessons and read any chance she could get. Bella says that her favorite book is wuthering heights and she has read it so many times that it is beaten up beyond repair and the spine is so cracked that the book lays flat. This would clearly be her special interest. Her other special interest is clearly vampires.

6. Burnouts and meltdowns when Edward leaves: when Edward left in new moon, Bella obviously fell into a huge depression, but I also think she fell into an autistic burnout (if you don’t know what that is pls research or ask me cause this post is already too goddamn long). And in eclipse, when Edward leaves to go home in the afternoon or to go hunting, she can barely focus without him and gets very anxious (this is obviously because she loves him and is literally obsessed with him lol, but I also think it could be a meltdown from separation anxiety and also a change in routine (a lot of autistics get very upset when their usual routine is disrupted or changed))

7. Sensitive to sounds: In the book, often Bella cannot concentrate or fall asleep because of little sounds like the rain, sometimes it takes ages for her to sleep because the rain or tapping is too distracting. (This is a common autistic struggle).

8. Stims & facial twitches & stuttering: in the movie, she is constantly stuttering over her words, and her face and body twitches a lot. She also stims a lot in the book by playing with her hair or sleeves or the zip of her jacket, or her hands or edwards hands. She also covers some of her face with her hair, this could be to do with sensory overload, seeing too much in her field of vision may be overwhelming for her, like a lot of autistics.

9. Trouble expressing feelings/ thoughts: bella struggles a lot sometimes with communication and telling people how she feels. You can see this in her relationship with Charlie. They both love eachother very much but they never say it and when they do it comes out very awkward and sometimes they use the wrong words. You can also see this when she is hesitant to tell Edward in eclipse when she doesn’t want him to leave for the fight, it takes her ages to work up to telling someone how she feels. She also tends to be quite private. This is common for some autistics to feel.

10. Sensory experiences: bella loves the sun and heat, she says that she loves feeling the sun seep into her skin- a lot of autistics feel the sensory world very strongly and love certain sensations and detest others. When Bella moves to forks, she hates the sudden change in weather and gets anxious and upset at the feel of the cold, and the rain against her skin. This links back to my other point where I was talking about how autistics fear sudden changes in routine. Bella is very relieved when there’s a sunny day in forks and goes and sits outside, savouring the weather which reminds her of home.

11. Not too concerned with how she looks: obviously not every autistic person is like this, but quite a few autistics don’t really focus on how they look/present and what they wear. They don’t really know about the social norms and what other people wear so they do what they want. This is something I often see in Bella in the books especially.

12. More quiet/ reserved and socially withdrawn and awkward: this is basically self explanatory. Bella is very well known for this. I touch a bit more on this in point 3.

If you made it this far then thank you so much! This took a long ass time to write and I’ve been thinking of making this post for months. There are more things that make me headcanon her as autistic, but these are just from the top of my head. When I re-read the series (for like the 100th time lol) later this year, I’ll annotate the book so that I can update this post in the future with more supporting this).

Again this is just my opinion and my personal headcanon, it is not factual (but I’d obviously want it to be canon) so please no hate :)

If you have any more things to add on then please do!! I’d love to hear your thoughts!

#twilight #twilight saga #bellaswan #twilightrenaissance #edwardcullen #bellaswanautistic #autism #autismawareness #actuallyautistic #autistic #neurodivergent #new moon #eclipse #breaking dawn #midnight sun #smeyer

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ghostdrew22 · 3 years

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Déjà vu? || Draco Malfoy

Requested: No Pairing: Draco Malfoy x ex!fem!reader Warnings: Idk if this is angsty or not because I initially thought it was but it feels a bit like soft sadness to me? Summary: Y/N getting deja vu as you watch Draco with his new girlfriend (H/N - her name)

WORDS : 1950

Lyrics from “Deja Vu” by Olivia Rodrigo (but I got lazy and only used certain parts)

~~~

Car rides to Malibu Strawberry ice cream, one spoon for two And tradin' jackets Laughin’ 'bout how small it looks on you (Ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha-ha)

“Draco stop!” A voice exclaims before being followed by laughter. You know that you shouldn’t turn around, that it’ll hurt too much, but it’s been said many times that curiosity killed the cat.

He’s holding the very same ice cream order, strawberry and pistachio, and sporting that familiar warm smile that used to comfort you when you got a brain freeze from the ice cream. It had been your idea, ice cream in November, and he’d hated it at first but grew to love it just because it made you happy. That very same order that you’d made him try, strawberry and pistachio, but not for the two of you this time.

It’s difficult to know what you were expecting, something new? Different? A part of you had always known, even while you were the one in H/N’s position, that your moments with Draco would soon be documented and used for a modern remake. If your relationship had been a book, theirs is the movie adaption. If your relationship had been a song, theirs is a cover band’s rendition. Maybe, deep down, you were expecting just this- to see him treating her the same way that he’d treated you.

Those pale hands, that used to fit so comfortably in the expanse of your own, are now tucked safely in-between hers. Oceans of blue that used to run over your shivering figure every November when you made this exact Hogsmeade trip, are now tracing the lines of her face and committing them to memory. Lips, cold and slightly chapped, that were once coaxing laughter from your lungs with horrible puns and crude observations, are now completely and utterly consumed with the sole objective of entertaining her the very same way that they entertained you.

It’s a bitter sight, one would think, but you can’t bring yourself to be jealous. It’s an odd sort of feeling, deja vu, to know that once this moment belonged to you, and now you have to watch it play out in front of you. You know what’s going to happen, down to the footprints that’ll stain the path back to Hogwarts, but this time it’s not you. This time, even though you know what’s going to happen next, it’s not your laughter that’ll be filling the silence as he walks back to school.

Watching reruns of Glee Bein’ annoying, singin’ in harmony I bet she’s bragging to all her friends, saying you’re so unique, hmm

“Draco’s obsessed with this muggle show called Glee. He makes me sing along with him every time we watch it.” She says with a small laugh and a shy smile.

Why, in God’s name, did you decide to study in the library today? Sitting on the other side of the bookshelf behind you, with Millicent Bulstrode, is H/N.

“That’s horrendous.” Millicent replies with a laugh. Maybe if you’d tried harder to be friends with her then she would’ve told H/N that Draco used to do that with you too, that you’re the one who introduced him to muggle tv shows in the first place.

“It’s cute, he’s so… different.”

You swallow hard and try to pour your focus back into your books. That tone, sweet and infatuated, was the tone you used only months before when you spoke about him too. Once again you’re on the other side of the looking glass, staring back at a distorted reflection of yourself. It had been you bragging, drowning quite innocently in your adoration for him and feeling the need to sing your praises out to the world.

Way back when, you were the one forcing him to learn the lyrics to all of your favourite songs. The two of you would lose track of time singing along with the actors and complaining about the unnecessary drama, it was this little world that the two of you created. But now that world, that you built on love and trust, can no longer afford to accommodate you both. Now it’s his world with her.

Without even realising it you start to wonder how it must be when he’s with her. Does she sing off-key too? Does he pepper her with kisses after and make fun of her singing? Do they binge watch episodes or only do one at a time? Does his laugh still drown out the talking whenever something ridiculous happens? Is his favourite character still Sue?

How many pieces of your time together did he take from the puzzle, to form a new one with her?

So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too? She thinks it's special, but it's all reused That was our place, I found it first I made the jokes you tell to her when she's with you

“This alcove is where I come when I want to be alone, no one really comes here.”

No one but me, you think to yourself as you stop in the hallway and overhear Draco whispering to her. Of course he took her to your alcove, why wouldn’t he?

A part of you wishes that he’d tell her that it was you who found this spot, that it was you who’d trudged along the castle one night in a desperate search for some peace and quiet. You want her to know that this was your safe space, that you were the one who invited him there and allowed him to relish in the safety that it provided. It was you who laced your fingers together with his own and dragged him behind you until you’d landed in the spot, you who had to listen to his complaints about how small and cramped it was until he finally got comfortable and fell in love with it. You were the one he used to wrap his arms around and make promises to in the silence of the night, when nothing beside the two of you existed in that alcove.

It’s all blurring together, then and now are nothing but two sides of the same rusted coin. How can you possibly distinguish between your memories and reality when the boundaries keep crossing?

You almost want to laugh at how identical your relationship was to the one they have now. Jokes that you came up with in the sludge of sleepiness, when the two of you used to hide out here on nights when you both felt sad, are now being repeated into the very same air that you breathed only months ago. Promises that you’d both agreed to back then, are being remade in the safety of the night that now belongs to them.

“I love you.”

And

“Forever.”

Are being whispered between the two of them, assurances and pacts to be together till the end of time.

But now you wonder, how long is forever?

Do you get déjà vu when she’s with you? Do you get déjà vu? (Ah), hmm Do you get déjà vu, huh?

The smell of toast and freshly scrambled eggs wafts through the Great Hall and you struggle to resist the urge to moan out in excitement. Breakfast is your favourite meal and, really, the only meal that’s worth anything. As you plop down in your seat and start to pack your plate in your food you fail to notice, in your sheer joy, that Draco’s sitting across from you with H/N by his side.

It’s not until you’re done piling up your favourites, like an Olympic gold medalist in training, that you notice the couple sat across from you. You observe discreetly as Draco outstretches his hand all over the table to get whatever she wants to eat, and you have to struggle to focus as a wave of déjà vu washes over you.

When had you stopped being the one he arranged plates for? When had he started saving a spot beside him for her, and not you? Literally you know that the answer is roughly around 3 or 4 months ago when the two of you had broken up, but he’d stopped being yours a long time before then and you’d both known it. Little moments of love, that had been the basis of your relationship, had fizzled out into distant memories way before you’d both decided to call it quits.

“Butter or jam, Y/N?”

You’re about to answer, on instinct really, when you realise that he’s not even speaking to you.

But he said your name. Didn’t he?

Do you call her, almost say my name? ‘Cause let’s be honest, we kinda do sound the same Another actress I hate to think that I was just your type

“It was mortifying!” You exclaim as you recount the events of earlier to your best friend.

“How bad could it have possibly been?” She asks with a laugh as she settles into your bed comfortably.

“He looked her dead in the eyes, and called her ‘Y/N’, and to make it one hundred times worse, I was sitting across from them when he did it so they both immediately turned to look at me!” You cry out in embarrassment as you drop your face in a pillow. “I’ve never prayed so hard for the ground to open up and swallow me whole.” You mumble against the fabric and you hear her laugh again.

“Why are you so embarrassed? It wasn’t your mistake.”

“It’s not about that, it’s about how easy it would’ve been for us to return to our roles as boyfriend and girlfriend. I almost answered him!” You sigh. “It’s been what? 3? 4 months? And my mouth still acts on muscle memory. We’re so familiar to each other that we still act on instinct.”

“Are you sure it’s not just because your names sound so similar?” She raises her eyebrows at you and you scoff. “Really? Y/N and H/N sound nothing alike?”

“Nope, not at all.”

“Okay, if you say so.” She shrugs, “But deep down I think all three of you know that there’s more similarities present than you’d like to account for.”

You huff in response and cross your arms. Is she right? Does Draco have a type?

Even worse, are you just Draco’s type? Nothing more and nothing less than just another girl who ticks all of his favourite boxes?

I know you get déjà vu I know you get déjà vu I know you get déjà vu

It’s on one morning, on one of your good mornings, that it happens.

Months of watching the two of them recreate the love that you’d had with him, suffering in silence and scolding yourself for thinking such awful things about them, finally come to a halt when you receive the acknowledgment that you’ve been so desperately craving.

She walks onto platform 9 and 3/4 in a dress, a purple dress that looks eerily similar to the one you’d worn two years before on this exact platform. She’s smiling brightly, excited for the new school year, and Draco’s waiting for her by the door with a smile that’s just as bright. When his eyes catch her own and she slips her hand into his, he stumbles backward in shock slightly. He immediately looks away from her and searches the crowd, scanning over people climbing into the train and saying goodbye to their families, in a desperate attempt to find you.

It’s too much for him, to see her standing before him and looking like a replica of you, and he needs some sort confirmation to know that he’s not imagining this similarity. The dress wraps around her waist the same way that yours had wrapped around your own waist, and it compliments her skin in a way that’s hauntingly memorable. He knows that he’s seen all of this before, and he knows that it wasn’t with her.

You’re standing a few paces away from the door, watching the scene unfold, and when his ocean blues finally meet yours, you know.

He smiles at you, the first time he’s done so since you broke up, and mouthes exactly what the two of you need to hear.

“Déjà vu.”

And then it’s over- the moment, the agony, the months of confusion- it’s all packed up into a neat box and stored away. He turns with her and they walk into the train together, happily.

You remember this, being the one in her position and walking by his side. You remember the feeling of utter joy that had consumed you, it’s all the same really.

But maybe this time when he promises forever, he’ll mean it.

~~~

This was meant to be way angstier but I got lazy and ended up just wanting to write it out before I ran out of love for the idea.

Anyway, I kind of like it...

love you all,

jean <3

#draco #draco malfoy #draco x y/n #draco imagine #draco fanfiction #draco malfoy x y/n #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy fanfiction #draco x oc #draco x reader #draco angst #draco malfoy angst #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy fluff #draco fluff

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j0eyj0rdis0n · 3 years

Text

DATING MIW

CHRIS MOTIONLESS -

Loves showing you off, like it's insane the amount he talks about you

Also love love loves giving you his jackets when it's cold out because they're so big on you

Y'all go all out on Halloween and I don't even think I need to go into much detail cause y'all got the most decorated house on the block and all the little kids love you guys

You both run on coffee, half of your grocery runs are just for coffee, every morning you both sit together and enjoy your coffee even if it's hectic you both make time for that silence together

You both sing together in the car and you know despite all of Chris's efforts to assure you he's not distracted driving, he totally is

You do his makeup before concerts and he lets you have free reign which makes you so so happy, he loves the glimmer in your eye when he tells you to 'go wild'

Always throws you a rose at the end of the show with a wink and it never fails to make you blush

His kiss of choice is on the tip of your nose, he finds it so cute for an unknown reason, or at least one he refuses to tell you...

If you can't come on tour with him then he makes sure to video call you nightly unless you're busy then he just relentlessly texts you through the day

Always makes sure to let you know how much he loves you and how much you mean to him

RICKY HORROR -

I'm telling you photoshoots every day

He finds every part of you so attractive, from your head to your toes you're perfect to him

Long walks together (of course he secretly takes photos of you during)

The amount of scrapbooks y'all will have when you're old and grey is crazy

When you watch movies he always criticizes the cinemaphotography, movie night is always Thursday. You have no choice in this.

Forces you to have virtual movie night with him over video call when he's on tour if you're not with him even with the protests you put up, he knows you love it

He will not get interrupted during these calls, he makes absolutely sure of it. If any of the guys walk in, one glare from him and they're out

Tries so so hard to teach you how to play guitar

He always gives you the prettiest shots in the tour vlogs, often moments you never realized he was recording

You call him your stalker since he can never quit watching you like he's amazed by everything you do

He devotes so many songs to you on tour, some of which don't make sense but you take it anyway

Can't ever seem to take his eyes off of you when he preforms, like he can seem to pick you out anywhere in the venue

He's a hand kiss kind of guy, very romantic of course

Lots and lots of roses as gifts

Loves it when you help him with his makeup

RYAN SITKOWSKI -

Teasingly throws picks at you during shows

You always have to do his makeup and slick back his hair because he pretends he's too busy to do so even though he just loves the way you spend extra time with him before shows

He cooks for you always and loves every second

You both coordinate outfits together, making sure they match and everyone knows you're together

Lots of late night skates through the cities you tour through together (if you can't skateboard then bike or roller skate)

Always exploring together and he always has to take your picture

Loves posting about you two and what you guys do together

If you weren't a stoner before then this man has converted you somehow

Always cracking some stupid dad joke that you always laugh at even when no one else does because you just can't help yourself

Light pecks on the lips are his most common way of showing affection besides hand squeezes that always seem to comfort you perfectly

If you can't come on tour with him then he always video calls three times a week at 10:00 PM whatever time zone you're in.

Loves telling you crazy tour stories

Always brings you a beautiful outfit home that he thinks you'll like

VINNY MAURO -

Literally like a lost puppy without you so stay close at all times

You have to cook for him since he literally seems to burn water

Lots and lots of teasing from him, sometimes he doesn't realize you take it to heart but feels terrible when you finally tell him

He loves it when you play with his hair or put it in different styles

Also when you help him put on his body paint? The man loves it

Every car ride you have together you compete and see who can name the most songs that come on shuffle, you usually win unless you feel nice enough

He loves it when you sit in on his drum streams, he gets so distracted by you that the chat gets jealous (of course you get unlimited and free song requests even if he makes fun of you for some of them)

Sometimes he tries to embarrass you by making you play drums on stream (something in which you're quite bad at)

Constant competitions to see who's better at what

Lots of video games together, like a crazy amount

On tour you both team up on the guys, playing all sorts of pranks

He lets you co-star in his segments of the tour vlogs and you both eat it up

If you can't come on tour with him, he always makes sure to call you

Always manages to find you the cd's or records you want on tour and bring them back as not-so-surprises

Definitely a neck kisser

JUSTIN MORROW -

Absolutely adores you like the way this man looks at you makes you want to tear up from joy

He always lets you pick the new color for what he should dye his hair, he never cares how crazy it may be

Loves it when you match your outfits with his hair color

You both jam out together, making sure to annoy the neighbors in the process

You both cook together often, usually dinner, unless you unanimously feel lazy and decide to order takeout

Lots and lots of sports marathons, if you don't like it then honey are you screwed because this man is obsessed

If you don't like the Dolphins then you're kicked out during the games with any opposing teams, sorry I don't make the rules here

Always making faces at you while preforming which you don't hesitate to make back

Helps you take plenty of pictures for your socials and loves doing so

More of a phone call kind of guy so when you can't come on tour he'll make sure to call you relentlessly, checking up on you all the time, he acts like he didn't just call you two hours ago and expects something grand to have happened

A forehead kisser, he loves the fact that he's taller than you and makes it very apparent

Loves being that one obvious goth couple in public and having people stare

#motionless in white #miw #headcanon #miw headcanon #chris motionless #chris motionless headcanon #chris cerulli #ricky horror #ricky horror headcanon #ricky olson #ryan sitkowski #ryan sitkowski headcanon #vinny mauro #vinny mauro headcanon #justin morrow #justin morrow headcanon #dating #boyfriend

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herstroywritten · 3 years

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Their Aching Firsts.

I still have no excuse for my obsession with them. Not sure how I feel about this particular story, but I wanted to post something for the start of Rivusa week for the hell of it. It’s about 7k words (I apparently can’t stop writing them once I start and their works end up being endless). Oops.

Fair warning, there is a umm *spicy* scene near the end there. I don’t usually write those and I tried to keep it as vague as I could, but I thought I’d mention it anyways. Other than that, enjoy and let me know what you think!

The first times they kissed, it was fueled by anger- he grabbed, she pulled, they crashed.

The first time they talked about it, it wasn't so much a conversation of words as it was one of looks. His eyes said "I want you and it terrifies me." Her eyes said "I think I want you, too. And I think I'm finally ready to admit that."

The first time Musa realized her new favorite jacket was once his, she stares at herself in the mirror for over an hour. She misses lunch with the gang and Riven comes knocking at her door and opens it to find her standing in front of that mirror in a state of awe. She's bathed in black leather, sleeves reaching the tips of her fingertips.

"You ok?" Arms wrap around her waist as she toys with the hem of the jacket. She looks at him through the mirror and smiles.

"I just want you to know I'm never giving this back."

He huffs a laugh as he lets his head fall to her hair, breathing her in. Lavender and something sweet that he's never been able to pinpoint. "Not even if this falls apart?"

She whirls around to face him. "I don't intend on letting that happen." Her hands are on the collar of his shirt, eyes blazing with stubbornness. He knows then that her words are a promise, a commitment and not just a comment in passing.

"I don't know, Muse. You still have time to regret all this. Regret the ruin of your reputation. What will people say?" His words are teasing, but she can see right through them. She senses his vulnerability, his apprehension.

"There are a lot of things I regret in life- yelling at my mother when I was fourteen because I didn't want to clean my room, being a bit of a bitch to my suitemates at the start of the year, hiding instead of fighting because I was too scared to see what my powers could really do. The regrets are endless. But, you, Riven, are not one of them."

He frowns, blinks away the swarm of feelings within him. "Yeah?"

She bunches her hands on his collar and pulls him down to her mouth. "Yeah."

"And what if I'm the one to end this?"

"And do what? Date some other girl for the hell of it?"

"Maybe, " he grins. "I hear I'm hot on the market now that I'm on the good side." She pulls him all the way down then, kisses him hard.

"Give it a try. Whoever she is, she won't last more than a day. And she'll defiantly never have you. Not really. I have you right where I want you, Riven. You're mine and you know it." She blazes a fire in him with her words.

"Oh yeah? And how would you know that?"

"You're here, aren't you?" She's all sass as she cocks an eyebrow at his question. "And, plus, it's kinda hard to lie to an empath."

And then she's kissing him again. This time with so much passion that he can't make sense of the world around him any longer. She pulls away only to tell him, "And I bet she'll never get that reaction out of you."

"No. No, she won't."

________________________________________________________________

The first time he calls her his girlfriend, it's not exactly in the situation she had imagined.

"Girls, I need to tell you something." Musa's voice wavers slightly as it rises above the noise that is their friends' laughs and chatter.

They're on the roof of Alfea, clustered among one another on the edges of old, shabby stones. The sky above them is dark and heavy. Stars wink at students from behind perfect clouds, ones that Musa remembers seeing in old cartoon movies that she used to watch with her parents when she was younger. From up here, the rest of Alfea seems like their whole world, its students miniature figures in a dollhouse. It's a perfect night, just as it should be. Rosalind is gone, out of the school and although that's not good enough, it's something. And Headmistress Dowling is alive and back in charge of the magical boarding school, where she belongs. From her perch up here, she can make out the headmistress' perfectly done hair as she leans back and laughs at something Silva is saying. She sees Professor Harvey heading towards their table, scolding students along the way to back away from the school's boarders. She's surprised that they haven't tried to stop all the drinking that going on. It seems that even the professors have had enough of the fighting, so much so that they're no longer focusing on the minute details of teenage life. Plus, she suspects that when they called for a party to celebrate the revival of Dowling and their taking back the school, they had fully expected the drinking. In fact, Musa had even seen Silva sneaking a few drinks to the teacher's table, but she'd never tell him that.

She can still hear Terra's squeal when Dowling had announced the party. And she can feel the toll of the heels Stella had insisted she wear on her feet. It has brought everyone so much joy, this little piece of heaven that they're being allowed, and she's been so very glad to just bask in it. After months of walking around with her headphones constantly on, trying desperately and failing to block the thoughts of despair, gloom, and pain, she welcomed the change. It had taken a lot out of her, but she had even worked up the nerve to leave her headphones behind for the party. The girls had been surprised at first, but then Bloom had stepped forward, wound their arms together, and led her outside the suite. She's been getting weird looks from them all night, little side glances with small smiles and questioning eyes, asking her if she was okay or if she needed to head out for a bit, take a breather. She'd returned them all with reassuring smiles of her own, letting them know that she was fine. And she was fine, but probably not for the reason they thought. Yes, the students around her were happy and she didn’t have much negativity to deal with from them right now, and yes her powers were getting better. But the reason she was doing so well had to do nothing with the students around them or her ability to control her magic and everything to do with the specialist across from her.

Riven and her had been a bit of a dichotomy since the start of her second semester at Alfea. They were paired together for combat classes from the very beginning of Rosalind's reign at Alfea. He'd flirted, as he did with everything that had a pulse and walked his way, and she had shut it down. Odd how that had only encouraged his behavior. Odder how she'd eventually come to appreciate it.

It was a slow transition, their thing. She had been resistant to accept she liked someone so very opposite to her last boyfriend, hesitant to give herself to that natural disaster that seemed to be Riven. Honestly, it seemed like a loss for a long time. She'd lay in bed some nights, staring at her ceiling, listening to Terra's slow breaths as she slept, and just think about the fact that just a few months ago (God, it boggled her mind that it was only a few months ago… where did time go? And how did they get here, in a school run by a once presumed dead war leader and a woman that seemed to exude death from her presence alone?) she had been perfectly happy with Sam and the silence that he brought. Sure, they had eventually called it quits once she had realized she couldn't live in silence forever and he realized she needed to learn to shield herself from harm. It had been tough, but they were friends. And she had been okay being single again. Truly, she had. So how she'd come to crave noise- his noise, loud and obnoxious emotions that sent her body tingling and her mind reeling- she doesn't know. But it had happened and once she's finally just accepted it, the ball was in his court. Too bad for her though, because just as hesitant as she was, Riven was ten times more resistant to the pull that existed between the two of them. Musa remembers all the nights they'd sneak out and he'd teach her new moves with a staff and sometimes he'd let her use his swords, teasing her as she struggled under their weight. She'd head back to her suite before the sun came up, always frustrated because couldn't he see?! Couldn't he tell? Why else would she show up every single night without fail? Why else would she stick around when the training turned to teasing and taunting turned to conversations in hushed tones? Long story short, it took him being under mind control and her breaking it for him to just finally, finally kiss her. And from then on, it had been secret meetings in different corners of the school, in their rooms when no one else was around, and anywhere else they could find some privacy.

She's itching to cross the space that separates them currently and slip her arms under his jacket, an action that she'd first done on instinct but which had quickly become a habit once she had realized the effect it had on him. She's been eyeing him the whole night, fully aware of his gaze on her. There's a reason she hadn't argued with Stella when she'd been handed the lavender slip of a dress that she currently wore. She'd even managed to forgive the light fairy for the strappy silver heels she had practically forced into Musa's feet when she caught Riven staring up and down her bare legs.

"Musa? What is it? Are you ok?"

Bloom's worried tone pulls her back to reality and she forces herself to face away from Riven and toward the girls. She'd avoided this conversation for so long, but it had to come out at some point tonight and it had to happened before one of the girls found them in some shady corner with their clothes half off.

"Oh, no I'm fine! It's not that." Now, how to approach what it actually was?

Aisha's confused tone follows her reply, "Well, then, what is it?"

"Um, it's kind of a little complicated…" Musa's voice trails off and she has to physically stop herself from turning back to Riven to see if he's ok with this, with what she's about to say.

"Musa you're freaking me out a little here," Stella's eyes narrow at Musa's fidgeting her hands. Huh, she hadn't even noticed herself playing with the hem of her dress.

"Oh no! Did you actually kill that poor guy that tried to hit on you?" Terra sounds worried as Musa just groans at her words.

"Ughhh. Terra, we said we wouldn't talk about that."

"What guy?" Riven's question comes at the same moment as her whine, except his is louder and much more aggressive. All heads turn to him, and Musa curses the jealousy that she feels coursing through his veins right now. Damn it, couldn't he just keep it in long enough so she could explain to her suitemates what the hell was going on between them? His eyes are all rage and warning as he stares Terra down. And for some reason, she's all worked up at his gaze and doesn't know what to do with herself. She really shouldn't be so attracted to this side of him.

"What's it matter to you?" Aisha questions, eyebrow raising in his direction.

"It just does."

"Really, Riven? The middle school comeback? Classic."

"Stay out of it, Aisha. I wasn't talking to you."

They're bickering back and forth, and Musa can sense both their patience straining. This is not how she was hoping this would go. Finally, she steps between them, one hand on Aisha's shoulder and the other on Riven's chest. "Ok, that's enough."

Aisha glares his way one more time but steps back, Riven does not. Instead, he turns to Musa and asks her, "What guy, Musa?"

"It doesn't matter, Riven."

"It does to me."

"Well, it shouldn't. It was just some drunk dude with a bad haircut. That's it." She's trying to reassure him, to let him know that this thing they have going on isn't just something she's going to drop the first chance she gets for any guy that makes eyes her way. She knows that's one of his big insecurities. He has it in his head that he's not good enough to deserve this, something that isn't completely fucked up from the very beginning.

They're trading glances, a secret conversation of their own happening between them.

"No!"

All heads snap toward Bloom. The second she turns around, Musa knows that her redheaded roommate has figured it out. Bloom is grinning at the two of them, practically bouncing on her heels as she grabs onto Sky's arm and tugs on it. "Did you know about this?! Why didn't you tell me?!"

Sky (bless his soul) looks at his girlfriend with confusion evident in his face, "Know what?"

Except it's Stella that answers, "They're dating."

And then mayhem ensues and Musa suddenly wishes she had thought this through because she's feeling so much from so many people right now and she's not quite sure how to handle it. She tries to hide the wince that forms on her face as she tries to answer all the questions her friends are practically screaming her way, but Riven must have noticed it because he reaches for her hand and pulls her out of the circle the girls have formed around her and closer to him.

"Alight, that's enough." It's the rasp in his voice that sends her spiraling every time he speaks, and she's putty in his hands. It's pathetic, she should have more self-control than this. "Yes, we're dating. Yes, she's my girlfriend. And, Aisha, no I did not pay her or threaten her into it. Gods above!" He takes a sweep of the room, gesturing to all their friends with a hand as if to say 'you're all very welcome.'

"Any other questions?" No one speaks up. Not that Musa would have heard any of them because good gods, did she hear him right? Did he just say what she thinks he said? Is she his… girlfriend? They'd avoided so many labels for so long that it had completely slipped her mind to actually name this thing between then by the time that they had finally become something substantial. And she's been fine with that deal, with not having to name their relationship, but hearing him call her his girlfriend has send her body trembling, fire coursing through her veins and butterflies bursting in her stomach.

And then he's pulling her away, down the stairs that led them up to the roof and between hallways that blend into one another as her mind focuses on the way his hand grips hers and the lust (his? hers?) that seems to be engulfing her whole being.

She lets him lead her into his room, onto his bed, and just as he leans down to kiss her, she moves down and places a kiss on his neck instead. Looking up at him, she tests out the word that's taken over her brain since it left his lips, "Girlfriend?"

"Fuck. Is that not what this is? I, I don't know- I kind of figured- I don't know. Shit, sorry-" If she wasn't so very in love with the idea of being his girlfriend, his something (just his), she would have let his ramble continue. She didn't get to see this often, a flustered Riven, and it was a sight she found quite adorable. But, alas, she had other plans for tonight.

She bends her neck upward, uses her toes to push herself up the bed, and kisses him ever so lightly on the lips. Just enough so that he stops talking. A feather's whisper of a kiss, against which she purrs "That is exactly what this is if that's what you want it to be."

His eyes are black with want when he closes them and his hand comes up to trace the edges of her jaw. His breathing speeds up as he leans his forehead against hers, and that's how she knows he's trying to collect his thoughts, watching his words as he often does when he's scared he's about to make the wrong move, say the wrong thing. She swears she's going to get him to stop doing that around her, because she wants his thoughts, every single one of them, as raw as they are. She doesn't want the filtered version. And she can feel them, mingling into the background as his insecurity takes over. Her hands find their way to his jaw and now they're holding each other, "Tell me."

He opens his eyes, opens his mouth to tell her, just as she knew he would. He'd never deny her anything and she's learned that in the short time that they've been together. He'd collect the stars and fashion them into a necklace she could wear around her neck if she asked for the universe. He'd start and end a war if she so much as suggested it. He'd give her his soul, she thinks. All she needs to do is ask, and he breaks for her. Crack by crack. Splinter by splinter. Until he's cleaved wide open and she sees all of him.

"I do, want that. I want you." His voice is gruff, guttural. "What about you? What do you want?"

God, how does he still not get it?!

"You." A whisper, and then a kiss.

_______________________________________________________________

The first time he makes her cry, it's not because of something he said. It's because of something he did.

It had started like any other day- breakfast, classes, social gatherings at the end of the afternoon. Musa and Terra had just left botany lessons and were heading towards the specialists training grounds to meet up with Sky and Riven before they all went to grab dinner together. It had been all fun and games, Terra and her grumbling about how ravished they were and laughing along at each other's comments. But Musa had sensed the uneasiness that radiated from the training grounds the second they had rounded the corner of Alfea's large lawns. Silva was especially on edge, and the fact that he had all the upperclassmen and the best of the specialists lined up as he walked back and forth between them shouting orders could not be a good sign. And with an insane mastermind on the loose, Musa had feared the worst as anyone else would. She'd taken off running, and Terra had followed without any questions, trusting her instincts.

She only caught glimpses of Silva's orders. "… Five burned ones… Two upperclassmen faries out there already… We need to leave now- I'm going to need ten of you out ASAP. Five more will guard the school grounds… Any volunteers?"

Her heart stopped when in her peripheral vision, she saw Sky and Riven's hands go up. This would be the third one this month that they had volunteered for, and the last time they left the school grounds Riven came back with a broken foot that he's still limping along on. The word left her mouth before she could think about it, "No!"

He turned to her, surprised to find her standing among the specialists. "Musa?"

She can't be bothered to greet him, not right now, not when he's practically signing up for his own death. So, instead, she stares him straight in the eye and says it again. "No."

But Riven is as stubborn as she is, and she knows he's been itching to prove himself again, to make up for what he did under the control of Rosalind just a short while ago. His words crush her soul, "I volunteer for the outside team." He's talking to Silva, who's eyeing the two of them with an intrigued look on his face. He nods curtly at Riven's words. But Riven is looking at her, his jaw set and tilted upward with determination.

"Alright, Sky and Riven, you'll lead the charge. Get your weapons. We leave in five minute. Go!" And then he and Sky are running toward their weapons bags, Musa and Terra hot on their tracks.

She catches up to him just as he's strapping on his swords. Her hand comes to pull at his wrist, motioning for him to face her.

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?" He won't look at her, won't meet her eyes. "Riven, I'm talking to you! You can't just volunteer yourself up for everything that could kill you! What the fuck is wrong with you?! Whatever you're trying to prove, stop it!"

He's reaching for his fighting boots, switching into them. Whether he's just not listening or if he just doesn't care, she can't tell. She wants to kill him. She wants to kiss him.

"Please," she can't believe she's begging. "Please, Riven. Your foot. You can't-"

"I'm doing it, Musa." She sees fury, internalizes it before her insides form it into something tangible and she can see it, feel it. It's red and blinding and raging.

"I'm asking you not to." He won't say no to her, he hasn't done it yet. She asks and he cracks for her right? Right?

Wrong.

"LET'S GO, SQUADRON 1!" She barely registers what Silva's command means until Riven is standing up.

"I'm sorry, Musa." And she knows he means it, because when his hands fall to her shoulders, quick and rushed, they're firm. He leans down to kiss her goodbye or as a form of apologizing, she's not sure, but she turns her head away from him and he ends up kissing the space between her cheek and jawline. If he won't look at her, then she won't look at him. And if he won't listen to her, then she won't give him the satisfaction of her approval. It's petty, she know that. She senses his emotions deflate at her actions, the feeling of rejection cutting into his heart like a shard of glass ripping through flesh. But she's seen this movie before, she knows how this story ends. Too many specialists have left the school's walls wounded and eager to pick a fight, only to come back on the brink of death or even worse, they haven't come back at all. And the idea of him becoming one of those statistics hurts more for her than her rejection will ever hurt him.

She doesn't turn to watch him leave, but she hears his boots beating against the pavement as he rushes to catch up with Sky… and then silence.

She's so numb by now. Numb to death, to feeling, to crying. She doesn't cry. Not when Terra comes to hug her from behind. Not when they're back in the suite and Bloom is practically sizzling with anger at the fact that they didn't think to bring her along on the mission and that Sky is being sent on yet another mission. Not when it's midnight and Dowling informs that the specialists made it back safely.

She doesn't go down to greet them when the other girls rush out the door. Terra lingers in the doorway.

"You sure you don’t want to come?"

"I'm good." She's staring outside the huge window of their living room, refusing to look down at the ground and try to make out if someone is missing in the mass of specialists standing in the courtyard.

"Musa-" She feels pity and worry coming from Terra, and she doesn't want to deal with it right now. She just wants to be numb for a little while longer.

"I said, I'm good."

Once Terra is gone, she turns away from the window and goes to sit by one of the couches. She counts the floorboards by the main doorway of the Winx suite. One, two, three, four, five, six…

She counts them three times over before the door finally barges open, it's hinges creaking from the immense force of the push just enacted upon it.

Riven's eyes frantically search the room before they finally fall on her. He walks towards her, limps actually. (She knew his foot wasn't healed, no matter how much he insisted it was.) He has blood splattered on his right side. His or someone else's, who knows? And when he finally reaches her, and falls to his knees in front of her so that they're eye level with one another, she finally cries.

He reaches for her. She pushed him off. "Fuck you, Riven. Really, fuck you."

"I'm sorry. Muse, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I-"

"Why don't you ever listen? You keep walking into wars as if they're welcoming parties. Do you want to die?! Do you have a death wish? What the fuck is wrong with you?!" She's being mean, unfair. She doesn't care. If asking won't work, maybe screaming will. And she's exhausted. Exhausted of worrying about him every time he leaves. Exhausted of wishing he would listen. Exhausted of fearing he's the one that didn't make it back, because it's almost been him so many times by now.

"I had to Musa." His voice is soft, odd in comparison to the loud tone he usually takes when they argue about this topic.

"You always have to! You don't have to prove anything Riven. And you most certainly don’t have to die for no fucking reason!"

"You don't get it-"

"So explain it to me!" He sighs deeply, and closes his eyes. "No, Riven. Explain it. What don't I get?"

He finally opens his eyes, throws a string of colorful swears at the ceiling before moving his gaze back to her. "It's not just proving something. It's that if I go and… if I go, then one less specialist has to go. And that's one less person with people that care about them having to go. And that's one less tragic death, and then a whole lot less people hurt. If I go… who cares, you know? And, honestly, shouldn't it be me? A taste of my own medicine and all that. After all the shit I helped Rosalind do." She senses his bitterness, feels his anger and destitute.

He's an idiot.

"You're an idiot, you know that?"

"And you're beautiful," he quips back. She watches that smirk that she's come to love make its way onto his face.

"Flattery won't get you very far in life, Riv." Except, maybe it will. Because somehow and for some reason she's here, and she's crying over him.

It's like he can read her mind, not the other way around, "I think it's gotten me pretty far as of right now. I mean, you're here." The look he gives her has her twitching in her seat and she has to remind herself that she still has more to say to him. She can't just let him off the hook that easily. He leans up to kiss her, and she places her hands on his chest, gently pushing him away.

"I care."

"What?" He's confused by her words.

"I care. If you go, and something happens. I care." She feels the surprise bloom from within him, and then a sense of overwhelming tenderness takes up his mind, and hers along with it. Her hands reach for him, " Come here."

This time, he obeys her. And as she kisses him, he cracks for her. Splinters for her. Lets her see him while he kisses her as if he's kissing her for the first time ever, ravaged and hungry for her. She sees it all- all of him falling into her and consequentially falling into place in her mind, in her heart. His insecurities, his fears, and his wishes. She doesn't shy away from him, but kisses him harder. His thoughts are exactly what she thought they were from the very beginning- a natural disaster. But she doesn't fear falling into them anymore, and in fact she thinks she likes them. She thinks she likes the way his mind works- ten emotions at one time battling to win out over one another. And when he pulls away, she likes the way his green eyes look at her like she's the whole world and the way his hands hold her tight enough for her to know that he doesn't think she's fragile but with enough care that she feels like she is all that he owns.

"Don't you ever," he's panting as he moves to place kisses along her jaw and at her collarbone, above her shoulders, anywhere the collar of her shirt will allow him. "Don't you ever pull away from me again."

She knows he's referring to the other afternoon, when he had left for the mission and she had closed off. "Why? Did I hurt your fragile ego?"

She's teasing, he's not. His hands are in her shirt and moving up, up, up until the offending piece of clothing is off of her. He's eager to kiss down her body, hands roaming the planes and curves that he must have memorized by now. He's kissing, kissing, kissing. Kissing away her tears, kissing right above her beating heart, kissing along her waistline. Frantic, needy, and-

Oh.

Oh. She thinks she's in love.

________________________________________________________________

The first time they slow down, she feels as though she has seen heaven.

Riven's lips on her lips, steady and firm yet gentle, as his hands lay splayed over her bare sides and his thumbs dig softly into the dips of her hipbones. One of her legs is tangled in the sheets around them and her other is hiked up above his hips, her heel digging into his spine. He moves inside of her, and when she feels her hips meet his, she slides her hands over his shoulders and lets her nails graze his back. He watches her below him, eyes asking if she's ok, she smiles at him and says, "Just… stay. Don't move for a bit."

And he does, closing the small space between them to catch her bottom lip between his teeth and pull on it before he continues with his love bites down her neck, behind her ears, onto her chest. He's making his way as far down as he can in their current position, and she's melting into him and fuck, she wants him to keep going. But she also wants him to slow down because she's on cloud nine right now and from up here she can see the stars in his eyes, can catch them between the kisses of his lips. Her hands move from his back, leaving behind what she can only assume is a mass of fresh red marks. They move to his chin as she drags him back up to meet her on that very cloud and then they're eye-level with one another once more. She feels the want form within him, she always does, but it’s an odd thing to actually see it emulated in his eyes. And there's something else there too, something she can't quite place and doesn't dare to assume of. When his lips brush hers for the umpteenth time, slowly shaping her name between them, she feels herself sink farther into him, a feat she had previously deemed impossible.

And her lips part in a whimper because oh good god, how had they never done this before? They were always so rushed, pulling at each other's clothes and stumbling into bed, falling into one another in a tangled mess of limbs and lust. Perhaps it was the fact that they had kept it in for so long, refusing to admit they liked each other and once they were together, not wanting to tell others for fear of shattering whatever fragile state they were in. Their relationship had started with fighting fueled by longing, innuendos charged with so many suggestions, and eventually an aching want that Musa still couldn’t wrap her mind around. Really, she shouldn't be surprised at how touch hungry the two of them had been at the beginning of the relationship. (How touch hungry they still were.) But right here in this moment, as she opens her eyes, she regrets not slowing down and taking him all in sooner.

He is a sight to behold, with tiny and larger scrapes all over his body that somehow added to his physique instead of taking away from it. They are tens of thousands of stars and she traces them over and over, forming constellations with his imperfections. The pads of her fingers run over the features of his face, committing every bit of him to memory, and as they skim the tiny scar above his left eyebrow, the question slips from her lips before she can stop herself.

"When did you get this one?"

He pulls away from her, just slightly so that he can see her face, and his eyes are darker than she's ever seen them as he lazily responds with a "Hmm?"

She's high on want and adrenaline, but she vaguely wonders if this is something he might not want to talk about. Too late to back out now. Plus, she'd like to know. "This scar. Above your eyebrow. How did you get it?"

Riven stiffens at her answer. She can feel his insecurity downing upon him, clouded by the desire and the want that still course through his body but slowly easing its way to the forefront of the battle that is his mind.

"I have them too," Musa whispers as she braces herself against his chest and heaves her body upward, brushing her lips against that very scar in question.

She moves back down again, and pulls her left arm slowly away from under him. She turns her head slightly to her left shoulder, using her index finger to point to a sliver of skin that's more taught and whiter than the rest of her. "I got this one when I was twelve. Tried to climb a tree that was too high off the ground. Had to get six stiches. My mom freaked out."

His eyeline follows her movements, and he stares at her shoulder for a few minutes. His gaze has her squirming a little, suddenly aware that she's naked in front of a boy she's very much into and that she has just pointed out one of the many flaws on her body. But then his eyes flicker upwards and he leans down and kisses her scar, just as she had kissed his.

"You're fucking perfect, you know that right?" She could cry.

"If you're trying to get in my pants, hate to break it to you, but they're already off," she teases, her voice soft and a smile on her lips. How else was she meant to respond?

He chuckles at her words, his laugh causing her to catch her breath as it does each and every time she hears it. It's an occasion that has become more common since they got together but which is still far and few in between. The sound vibrates off his body onto hers and has her writhing under him.

"Love, I would never consider your lack of garments a disappointment." He circles his hips above her, and she groans at the pressure. "And I would most certainly never forget being the one to take them off you, especially when you insist on making those noises."

Her eyes are blown wide as she grabs onto his forearm at the side of her head, where his fingers are buried in her hair. Her chest heaves up and down, up and down, heart beating so fast she's certain its rhythms are all in her mind and that it's no longer there. She's fairly sure she lost it somewhere between meeting him and getting here, to this moment.

He stops his teasing, opting instead to arch down once more and kiss the scar on her shoulder. He kisses it over and over until she feels her heartbeat slow down and her breath return to a somewhat normal pacing.

She tugs on his locks, silently motioning for him to come back up. Up he comes, and she's glad that she's somehow convinced him to continue denying her nothing.

"Tell me."

He knows she's referring to his scar.

They're nose to nose, foreheads touching, brown eyes boring into green ones.

"About a year and a half ago. Right when things started to get messy in my life. Messier than usual, I mean. Back then I was a bit of a nerd, hung out in the greenhouse all the time-"

"Yeah, I've heard a few stories from Terra," she cuts him off, a smile playing on her lips at the idea of Riven hunched over a lab bench with pretty vines all around him. It's a sight she hopes to one day see with her own two eyes, a side of him she knows she's so very close to opening up.

"Yeah, well, I'm sure you know how much of a dick I was after I started distancing myself from them. Sky, he got real mad one day. We were in Specialism class, learning some new sword tricks. I said some shitty things and then he tried to play the Saint Sky card. I got mad, I fought dirty. Scraped his arm with the sword. He finally snapped at me, landed a good blow right above my eyebrow." He laughed a bitter laugh at the memory. "Nearly missed my eye, the wanker. He apologized for two months straight. Either way, we both ended up in the infirmary and I figured I couldn't get rid of him. He kept me around and I stayed, almost like when we were children and we fought over dumb shit like who was the taller. Only difference now is that his scar healed and mine stayed."

That last sentence was loaded with so much, and Musa wanted to ask more but she didn't want to push her luck. She smiled at him, nudging his nose with hers. "So you used to fight over who was taller? The mental image of a baby Sky and baby Riven getting angry over something like that is almost, dare I say, adorable?"

He scoffs. "We were not adorable! We were two very manly twelve-year-olds with very some very manly, very reasonable arguments."

"Mmm," she hums against his skin. "Is that what you two have to this day? Manly arguments?"

"Are we really bringing Sky into the conversation while we're in bed?" She laughs, a full on laugh that comes from within her because his words were not what she had expected. "If you must know, now we argue over who’s got the hotter girlfriend."

His eyes are all mischief when she shakes her head at him. "Glad to see you two have really grown up."

"And I'm glad that I got the hotter girlfriend, because I'm not sure how else you've managed to keep me completely turned on while bringing up my best friend in the middle of us fucking."

And then it's her turn to tease him, turning her head slightly to the side so that she can catch his earlobe between her teeth and whisper in his ear. "I'll make it up to you."

And then she's flipping them over so that she's on top and she feels his breath catch. She smirks down at him mischievously and then they're off again, finishing what they started. She makes sure to go slow, to feel every bit of him as she moves, catch every angle of him below her and store it in her mind for safekeeping.

And when it's over and he's lying on his stomach, back facing the ceiling, she moves herself on top of him once more. Only this time, she kisses every scar on his body, sometimes asking where and how he got them until he finally gets the hint and starts sharing their stories before she can even ask. There are so many of them, some tiny and some much more noticeable. All of them have stories. She vows to herself that she will one day know all of them. That she will be there to soothe the next scrape, the next trauma. With each one of her kisses, she can feel the natural disaster within him reach a rhythm, not quite silenced but at peace.

They don't sleep that night. Only once she's sure she's kissed every inch of his body does she finally worm her way back into his arms, but they're both wide awake at that point. His eyes watch her in the dark, hair loose and splayed around them like some sort of blanket. It had been in pigtails at one point in the night.

"What are you thinking about?" she asks.

"I…I just," words knot in his mouth. His eyebrows furrow at her in frustration as he tries to untangle and spell them out for her. "God, I love you."

Just for that, she kisses his body all over again. And again. And again.

________________________________________________________________

Their first times have been nothing short of unexpected. It's never how either of them imagined all these firsts would go. They're not soft and tender, though there are moments like that in-between, but neither had expected that. Their raging passions did not allow for it. But what they had expected was a lot more arguing, a lot more push and pull. Instead, they seemed to somehow fall right into each other- crash and burn style, no holding back.

Their firsts were painful lessons that needed to be learned. They were gnawing pains that needed to be had, throbbing emotions that had to be felt and delt with. They were stinging feelings, these firsts- stinging because they felt too much too soon and too fast and neither knew what to do with all of that expect for let it bubble until it exploded before them in an aching manner.

Their aching firsts.

#rivusarevolution2021 #rivusa #this is pure angst #I can't say I'm sorry for writing it #firsts

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wannabemobwife · 3 years

Text

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas - Chapter 17

Chapter 17: Blood is Thicker than Water

Dad!Mob!Tom x Mom!Mob!Reader

-Pairings: Tom Holland x Reader, Rosie Holland x Henry Osterfield, Rosie Holland x Linus Perry

-Warnings: References to sex, language, typos, sad thoughts, attempted suicide, vomiting

-Words: 4.4K

A/n: Thank you so mucg guys with all the live support. Finally done, yay, with part 1

Chapter 17: Blood is Thicker than Water

Words: 4.4K

Four years had passed and Rosie was the only one to stick around. Everything had changed. You and Tom were currently on your trip around the world. Traveling everywhere from Cuba to Greece. Taking in sights of the world.

Embarking on journey covering 3 continents and 10 countries so far. You had already visited the Taj Mahal in India, the Amalfi Coast for some sun, and Iceland just for the blue lagoon hot springs. You and Tom were having the time of your lives, it being the perfect distraction from everything back home.

Rosie was running the mob along with her new right hand and consigliere, Linus. Rosie had been taking on the mantle as the new leader of the Holland mob. Picking up where Parker left off. Trying to do him justice. Tom had helped her learn the ropes but she always had that fiery personality desired for a mob persona.

After four years, Rosie learned to embrace her grief instead of shoving it away, she began to visit Parker’s grave more and more. Tried to every week, but life got in the way. She would bring a new set of flowers to freshen up the old ones.

She knew today would be especially hard, every year it was impossible. Rosie could barely get through the day. Today was her 20th birthday, marking 4 years of celebrating without Parker.

Rosie and Henry’s relationship had grown into one full of misery. Trapped in a loveless relationship, but he was still her best friend. With just one look he would know what she was thinking.

Over the past couple years, Henry has been so obsessed with keeping her safe that it was driving her mad. Rosie understood that Henry didn’t want to lose her like he lost Parker, but Rosie ran a mob and danger followed her everywhere. They started drifting apart when everything happened with the Holland family, creating unfixable cracks in their foundation.

Lately, Rosie had been feeling someone watching her every move. Following her whenever she would be downtown. Feeling a presence she hasn’t felt in a while. Constantly shivering in fear, feeling as though she was observed. From then on, every move she made was calculated and thought out.

When Rosie first took on the mantle, she cleaned house. Eliminating those whose loyalty would always lie with Tom. Trying to affirm the fact that she was so much more than just Tom’s daughter. She had let William go and few others because she brought in Linus.

Even after starting her new regime, things have been a bit off, lately. She hasn’t been sleeping through the night. She’d jolt out of sleep, drenched in a cold sweat. Henry would be startled awake as well by her movement as move to comfort her.

“Roo, you okay?” Henry asked groggily, yawning a bit. Rosie gasping to catch her breath. Her dreams were supposed to be an escape but now they were doing more harm than good. “I don’t know. I keep having these dreams about Parker. Like he was trying to tell me something,” Rosie said, gathering her bearings. It wasn’t everyday she was visited by her deceased twin brother. “From beyond the grave?…Rosie, he’s gone,” Henry pondered. “I know, I just can’t shake this feeling. That he is… he’s.”

“What? Still alive? Honey, we buried him. You cried over him. If he was still alive don’t you think we would’ve shown his face by now. Wilson and Carter are gone, they have been for awhile now,” Henry explained, hoping it would bring her some solace. Henry wasn’t blind to the change in her demeanor, she did open up to him about being followed everywhere she went. “I guess you’re right. But my dreams feel so real,” Rosie whispered, lying back down. Ready to drift off into a deep sleep. One not tainted by the memory of Parker. “Go, back to sleep baby.” Henry said, he knew they would be getting up in a few hours anyway. Tomorrow was a very big day. Henry knew he and Rosie had been drifting but he was all set to give her the best birthday ever.

Henry had bought tickets for you and Tom to fly in for her birthday and stay for awhile. This time of year was hard for all of you but it wasn’t fair to Rosie. The day that is supposed to be about her has always been shared but now no one dared acknowledge it. It was just a reminder of what had been lost.

“Good morning, beautiful. Happy birthday,” Henry whispered, peppering her face in kisses as the morning sun shone through the curtains.

“Thank you,” Rosie sighed. Every year was a challenge. It got a little better every year but she knew she would never fully accept his absence.

“What do you have planned today?” Henry inquired, he was always one for big gestures. He absolutely hated that she no longer enjoyed her birthday.

As a kid she loved the idea of turning a year older, getting to grow up and getting loads of presents of course. You always made the priority of throwing the most perfect themed parties for Rosie and Parker. One year they had a pirate themed pool party with a treasure hunt and another a circus/carnival theme with fair games and a petting zoo. You loved going all out for their birthday. Just spoiling them in general.

Rosie and Parker, also Tom, can’t forget about him, made life worth living. You and Tom did everything for your kids, never wanting them to feel an ounce of sadness.

But the times had changed, you were no longer the mother to a son. It was just Rosie and you thanked God everyday that she was still there but your heart will forever be scarred.

Scars take forever to heal, sometimes never. There will never be a day when you don’t miss Parker or he doesn’t cross your mind. Everything you did from the moment he died was for him, in one way or another. You knew the grief would never stop but you hoped Rosie would one day be able to move on with life.

“You know…” Rosie murmured. “Oh yeah, say hi for me,” Henry nodded along remembering Rosie was going to spend the day next to her better half, Parker.

Rosie proceeded to get dressed and ready for the day. She wore a tight grey dress showing off the perfect curves of her body. And a pair of black high heels to complete her power woman ensemble. “Henry, you aren’t throwing me a party right? I really don’t want one,” Rosie inquired. Rosie would prefer to have all birthdays pass and wash away but she knew Henry wouldn’t allow that. At the most she would have a nice dinner with him and watch a movie.

“You’ll just wait to find out,” Henry grinned cheekily. In reality he was throwing her surprise party to help her find the joy in her birthday again.

“Henry seriously, not this year,” Rosie announced. “It’s never any year. You haven’t celebrated in 3 years. You need to get over this.”

“Get over what? The death of my twin brother?” Rosie asked, astounded at Henry’s previous statement. The nerve he had, wow.

“Roo, I’m sorry,” Henry tried to apologize but Rosie left in a huff.

“Talk later, Linus is waiting for me,” Rosie yelled, already walking out of the room. “Linus, you ready to go?” Rosie said, as she found him drinking coffee in her kitchen. He sat at the bar, legs dangling off the chair as she came down. “Yes, Roo,” he said, a little out of breath from taking the awe of her beauty.

“Please don’t call me that around Henry… What’s on the agenda?” Rosie asked Linus as she poured herself her own cup of coffee.

“Well, Shaw owes you 3 million and the deadline you gave him expired,” Linus explained, he knew Rosie hated having things held over her head. She would prefer to get them out of the way as soon as possible.

“Well then, let’s go pay him a visit. I could use a drink. Afterwards, can you drop me off at the cemetery?” “Of course, Roo,” Linus said. Rosie huffed in response, rolling her eyes at the name. Linus loved to get a rise out of Rosie. Her remarks to his comments were just a sign of their playful banter.Rosie’s relationship with Linus was complicated. They were partners, most of the time.

Rosie had gone really dark over the past years. There were days where she refused to get out of bed. Sitting in bed wasting the entire day away. Henry would come home from work and try his best to comfort her but after Parker he was just as lost as her. They lived in the same house but not truly together. Not as lovers, maybe as roommates.

All Rosie could feel were thoughts of hopelessness, desolation, and misery. Never being able to find that light at the end of the tunnel. She didn’t deserve to find it, thinking she was the one who pushed you and Tom away. Blaming herself for Parker. All these feelings and Henry wasn’t there, too busy with his own life.

One day, Rosie had gotten real low. Couldn’t find a way out so she went to the gun room grabbed the closest pistol, a bottle of scotch, a glass and sat in Tom’s office. She rested on Tom’s chair trying to find the will to end it all. To point the pistol and pull the trigger.

It would be so easy, the flick of a finger. No more pain. She tried not to think about everything she was giving up. Never seeing you or Tom again, or Henry. Never loving him again, if they ever did manage to find their way back to each others arms. Never experiencing the things that made life worth living.

All her thoughts were halted as Linus barged in. He stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the broken girl hold a gun unto her temple, its safety clicked off. The room was cold as an icy chill ran down his spine.

“Rosie, what are you doing!?!” Linus thundered, trying to stop her before she pulled the trigger. “I don’t know. I think I’m trying to end it all,” Rosie whispered as tears streamed down her face. Deep down she didn’t want to pull the trigger, she wasn’t ready to say goodbye.

“End what all? Your life?” Linus asked, trying to talk her off the metaphorical ledge. Something had to happen that pushed her to this point. Rosie had to be drowning and calling out for help but no one came. “No, it was never about killing myself. It was just about ending the pain and suffering,” she cried.

“Rosie, listen to me. There is so much more you have to live for. This will pass. Think about everything you are giving up.” Linus tried to appeal to the people she loved, you, Tom, and Henry. Losing Rosie would no longer make you a mother. How could Rosie take that away from you?

“I already have and it hasn’t, for 2 years. How do you know it will get any better?” Rosie begged for a true answer. She had been slumping around, letting the days pass her by as she stood silent, screaming non-vocally for help. Trapped in an asylum of misery. “I don’t. But I’ll be there to help you,” Linus exclaimed, giving her the truthful response she wanted. Rosie just needed to hear that she wasn’t alone in this world anymore. “No, you won’t. You’ll just leave like everyone else. Henry doesn’t love me anymore. My parents left. I’m all alone.” “Roo, you aren’t alone. Just hand me the gun and we can work this out. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be here,” Linus pleaded. That was the first time he had used that nickname. The name had been reserved for only Henry, Parker and you. In that moment Rosie saw someone she missed so dearly in Linus, Parker. Parker was the only person who was 100% there for her. He was there to talk her off the ledge. He was there at her weakest and in a split second he was standing in front of her.

Rosie gave in, removing the gun from her temple, clicking the safety one and handing it over. She slowly stood up, coming over to Linus and collapsed in his arms. Rosie whispered a small “I missed you” as he held the broken girl. He was the only one who could pull her out. Not Henry, god she wished it was Henry. Linus understood her pain and didn’t try to fix everything.

Henry was the opposite. Constantly worrying about Rosie and trying to find a solution for everything. Things from the slightest backache to feelings of hopelessness. Rosie didn’t need fixing she just needed to be heard and Linus made sure she was. At Harmon’s, the bar was quite empty. Just Shaw and a few of his men. Shaw has borrowed money from Rosie to clear of a few charges. The Holland name had some pull in the legal community. Dating back to Dom’s days but Tom mostly laid down roots.

Linus entered first, firing two shots to take out Shaw’s capos. “Jesus Christ,” yelled Shaw as his protection thudded against the floor.

Rosie followed Linus in, making her presence known, “Shaw, you know I’m not a fan of people not staying true to their word. Do you have my money?”

“Rosie, doll. I paid you in full already. If this just your sad attempt to stir something up we can work this out another time. Shoo, let me finish my drink,” Shaw snickered. “Shaw, I know your games. You have 3 minutes to transfer my money right now. One for each million. I have Linus checking for a deposit of 3 million, make this simple and do it,” Rosie stated with an unchanging expression. “I need more time, that’s not enough. It’s all in separate accounts,” Shaw asserted, his voice starting to waver as he stared down the barrel of her pistol. “Well then, I’d hurry if I were you. Here’s your phone. Just wire the money… Starting now,” Rosie exclaimed as Linus devoted his stare to watch. Glancing at the seconds tick away.

“Fine, I’m going,” Shaw screamed, about to crack under the pressure.

“2 minutes left,” Linus chimed in. “Okay, I’m just inputing the dollar amount, it’s a lot of zeros.” Shaw tried to explain. He was about to lose his life because he was slow.

“50 secs.”

“I’m going, I’m going.”

“10, 9, 8, 7, 6—“

“I’m done,” Shaw said, letting out the breath he was holding.

“That was fast but not fast enough,” Rosie whispered raising her gun square to the back of his head. Her finger slipped to the trigger and fired a shot.

BANG

“Wow, I didn’t think you actually kill him,” Linus said, impressed by her ruthlessness.

“He was getting on my nerves, besides he will never borrow money from me again if he is dead,” Rosie chuckled. “You know I found that really hot,” Linus whispered in her ear. “You always do.” Rosie grinned at his advances, trying to pull her close to his chest. “Hey, this can’t keep happening.”

“Oh, come on. You say that every time. I can’t hide my feelings for you anymore.”

“Well, you are going to have to. I was clear about what this was. So I’m going to ask you this once more time, what do you want?” “I want you.” “Well you can have me in the bathroom in 2 minutes.” “Roo, you’re too good to me,” Linus smirked, following her as she glided to the restroom.

Everything lasted about 30 mins. They were in and out in a flash. The bar now smelled of sex and a dead bodies. Linus was the first to finish, coming out of the bathroom looking disheveled as hell. Sporting the same juts had a quickie look. Linus went to pull the car around after fixing his hair in the mirror.

Linus would never be Henry and that was a good thing, Linus was different. By no circumstances was Rosie in love with Linus or will ever be in love with him, he was merely a distraction. Rosie knew her relationship with him was wrong but he made her feel alive once more.

Rosie emerged from bathroom breathing heavy, almost gasping for air, with sweat glistening on her chest. She straightened out her dress as combed down her hair. Stepping out of the doorway, the smell of a fresh rotting body hit her.

Rosie immediately turned around and lunged for the toilet. She had been in the business for 3 years and never before had her body reacted this way. She hurled into the toilet for a good ten minutes. Eventually bringing her head out of the toilet bowl to wipe off her mouth. The air was now coupled with sex, dead bodies and vomit. She was clueless to what forced her to keep her head in a toilet bowl.

After her nausea spell passed her, she had Linus drop her off near the cemetery. “Oh, you can drop me off here. I need something from the pharmacy anyways,”Rosie informed Linus. She was planning on picking up something for her stomach, it was very unlikely for her to throw up suddenly.

“Ok, Roo. Do you need a ride home?” Linus questioned.

“No, Jared is supposed to pick me up. Thank you,” Rosie exclaimed, getting out of the car. “Alright. Happy birthday by the way. Can I have a kiss goodbye?” “Thank you and no. I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah for the party,” Linus called out slowly driving away. “Wait! What did you say?” Rosie remarked but he was already long gone.

Rosie was mentally kicking herself, she didn’t have the willpower to deal with a party tonight. She specifically told Henry, not to throw one but since when did he listen to her.

Their road to ultimately heartbreak was a two way street. Both of them had done something to warrant the loveless relationship. Rosie admitted to herself, that she eventually did stop trying. She stopped constantly asking if Henry wanted to go out for dinner and what time he would be home. Rosie prefers to blame Henry but in reality, she was then one who let go first.

Rosie stopped showing him love, too distraught by his every move because it was a constant reminder her brother wasn’t there anymore. Henry would try to work him into every little conversation, remembering Parker in everything. It grew too much for Rosie. Rosie had never been one for confronting her feelings, preferring to shove them down but how could she, when Henry would never shut up about Parker.

Parker was the main reason a wedge had been driven between them, but she wouldn’t dream of blaming her dead brother. Who couldn’t even defend himself. Rosie needed a reset after Parker but Henry was stuck living in the past.

Rosie was ready to start her life with Henry after graduation but he couldn’t let go. After a while, Rosie became just like him. Stuck drifting into a void of pure sadness. Rosie couldn’t let go, along with Henry. Their lives went in different directions, Rosie was blossoming into a ruthless leader who would only act soft around Parker, vowing to visit his grave everyday. And Henry got left behind at some point, not seeing how he fit in her life anymore.

In the pharmacy she scanned the aisles for some sort of quick remedy. If Henry was throwing her a surprise party, one she specifically asked not for. Rosie didn’t have days to recuperate, maybe a few hours.

She found the largest bottle of Pepto-Bismol and stopped by the card aisle. Carefully grasping a birthday card for her favorite person. One that was funny yet endearing. Parker was addicted to all the corned jokes she would crack. She made her way to the register. In front of her stood a little old woman, she wore a purple floral dress and her white stained hair was pulled into a clip.

“Just this for you sweetie? Oh, who’s birthday is it?” Asked the little lady, referring to the birthday card Rosie grabbed for Parker.

“My brother’s and um, could I also get this,” Rosie responded as her eyes glanced below her. Skimming over the candy bars, gum packets and eventually landing on a pregnancy test. Come to think of it, Rosie was late about a week and a half.

“Of course, honey. Would you like to use the restroom?” Queried the lady. Rosie nodded in response. She finished paying and quickly made her way to the restroom. Following the directions on the box carefully, she needed to be a hundred percent sure, before she told anyone.

Right around the corner was the cemetery. She glided through iron gates, walking across the cobble stone path before she came upon the place she loved most in the world. The place where she would hold nothing back, spilling everything to him.

Life of a mob boss was dangerous but things started to seem eerie for Rosie. She would feel weird presences or someone watching her at eerie times. The same feeling plagued her at the cemetery, today. She knelt down to the headstone, engraved in it read “Here Lies Parker Jackson Holland, Taken from us too soon, a son, a brother, and a friend.”

“Hey, P. You probably get tired of me visiting you. Everyday I’m here and sometimes I think I do it for my benefit more than yours. I hope that wherever you are, you are happy and most likely you are with Charlotte. I’m happy for you, Parker. No matter how much I wish you were here with me, I know that you are happy that you escaped this life. Happy 20th birthday.” Rosie whispered, fixing the flowers that began to wilt from yesterday.

“I have some really amazing news to share with you, but it will have to wait till next time. You can’t be the first person I tell, I’m sorry. He deserves to know before you…. Oh my god, you’ll never believe what happened at work…”

This is the one thing that brought Rosie solace. She persistently blames herself for that fateful night 3 years ago. Rosie would spend hours kneeling next to his headstone. She would tell him about her life and read off the postcards you and Tom sent from your travels. Talking to him as if he was still there.

Rosie glanced at her watch, it was half past five and she hadn’t even called Jared yet to pick her up. “I’m sorry P, I gotta go. Henry, god love him but, that bastard is throwing me a birthday party. I guess I should at least make an appearance. I’ll see you tomorrow, I love you.” Rosie said, walking towards the parking lot.

She stood under the gate for ten minutes waiting for Jared to arrive and escort her home. The weather completely shifted as the sun set around her. The once blue sky changed to one painted with vibrant yellows and pinks. The sky was a sight not to be missed but she could do without the freezing winds that accompanied.

A chill ran down her spine as she waited in the darkness. Feeling a sensation that only warranted panic. Rosie felt someone watching her once again. Maybe from a far or up close, but she definitely wasn’t alone. It was silly that she let feelings like those get to her. She was a mob boss for god sakes, scaring even the most menacing of men into submission.

Rosie eyes started darting everywhere a noise left. In the corner of her eye she caught a figure drenched in shadows approaching. She tried to scramble for her gun, but soon realized she left it in Linus’s car.

The stranger kept making advances and managed to get to her. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed a cloth to her mouth. Causing her to be consumed in darkness as her body grew limp.

Back at the manor, Henry was setting everything up perfectly. His mission was to make Rosie love her birthday once more. While Henry was working hard at hanging the birthday banner and decorating every corner with balloons, Linus was no help at all. Lounging on the couch and finishing a beer.

“So are you going to pick up Rosie and get off your ass?” Henry barked, pulling the coffee out from under Linus, causing him to spill his beer.

“Seriously, dude. What’s your problem?” Linus snapped.

“My problem is my girlfriend isn’t here. Aren’t you supposed to pick her up?” “No, Jared is.” “Linus, Jared is here. He has been for a few hours. Where is she?” Henry questioned, starting to worry. “I don’t know. Last, I left her at the cemetery.” “Henry! It’s so good to see you,” you cheered as Tom and you walked in. Hugging Henry after not seeing him for awhile. It still pained you to visit, traveling was the perfect distraction.

“Hope you have been taking care of yourself, son. Where’s Rosie?” Tom questioned. “Yeah, I’ve been good. At the moment, I don’t know where she is. She’s missing,” Henry concluded. You and Tom stood completely still as you processed the news. It wasn’t everyday that your daughter would disappear into thin air, but her job did keep her life in danger.Rosie missing was uncommon. It had happened once or twice in the past but that was 3 years ago. So much had changed, for the better. Yet, you were once again in the same place, in the house you left because everything was too familiar. Rosie missing was all too familiar.

Rosie came to. Opening her eyes to a place she chose to forget. For all she knew it was an exact replica. Warehouses riddled all of London’s ports, she could be anywhere.

“Text your driver and tell him Henry picked you up for a special birthday dinner,” Rosie’s kidnapper barked, thrusting a phone in front of her.

“Really? You kidnapped me? After 3 years of being leader of London’s most feared mob, it’s like been there done that. Do you want money or something? I have a party to get to.” Rosie quipped, annoyed with they man’s pursuits.

“Oh, I know. I believe happy birthday is granted. 20 years is a milestone.”

“Whatever, I don’t really like my birthday anyway.”

“Wanna talk about it?” The stranger pestered on. Rosie had learned lesson from the last time she was restrained to chair, rope around her wrists and ankles, ceasing blood flow. This time it was zip ties, a little basic for any mobster she has had a run with.

“No. I want you to let me go. Seriously, what do you want? I don’t think you know who I am. Or who my father is,” Rosie asserted.

“A moment alone together is all I ask and I know exactly who you are and who your dad is. Correction, who our dad is.”

“Parker.”

A/n: Finally the end. Alright, I'm going to bed. There is no set schedule for the sequel series, I'm just going to post a chapter when I finish writing it. Let me know if you like to be tagged in the sequel chapters.

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas Masterlist

Taglist: @thenoddingbunny-blog @adriannauni @dummiesshort @bi-lmg @allthisfortommy @quaksonhehe @housepartyprotocol

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland series #tom holland fanfic #tom holland mob au #tom holland au #tom holland x reader #tom #mob!tom #mob tom #mob!tom holland #mob!tom holland x reader #mob!tom x mob!reader #tom holland fan fiction smut #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagine #tom holland masterlist #mob!tom x reader #dad!mob!tom holland

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runnyeggsnham · 3 years

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"With Loki taking that value of order from Mobius, it just makes how Mobius took the value of freedom from Loki here that much more beautiful."

Oh my gosh. Thank you for welcoming my asks. I've been dying for obsessive analysis because I live for that shit.

And I'm so glad you pointed this out because from the moment they met, Loki said he'd burn the TVA to the ground, and Mobius blithely offers that Loki starts with his desk (foreshadowing???). Now here he is, happy to torch the place because his moral compass is not so rigid that can't weigh the difference between order and tyranny.

Which! If you think about it, Loki and Mobius are each moving towards that balance between anarchy and tyranny, free will and responsibility for others. The themes are really quite beautiful, and I honestly can't decide if the writers got there on accident because the quality of the writing is inconsistent.

As for Sylvie, I would hate for her character (and actress) to be treated like a throwaway. Aside from plot, it's also an awful pattern with female characters/actresses, but that's a different, more frustrating conversation for another day. That said, I think it would be fitting if she didn't change, if for no other reason than to pound home how difficult it is for Loki, regardless of variant, to break away from their destructive patterns. She very obviously doesn't have a plan for what comes after, and I don't doubt that the completion of her mission was not only empty, but anticlimactic. Her being lost forever at the end of time is pretty dark, and I hope our Loki will return to free her and then part ways, telling her (in Mobius fashion) that it will be okay, as another gesture of self-love.

I'm interested to see how the new Mobius will react to Loki's claims. I really hope, no matter the timeline, that he's inclined to believe and support Loki. I genuinely feel they bring one another a lot of joy. Like you said with the Pompeii quotes, they very much have the same... Inclinations as to what is considered "cool". It's easy to forget that before this series, Loki literally destroyed most of NYC with very little remorse. Now, he still finds destruction fun (I mean, I have morbid curiosity, too, I think a lot of us do), but he doesn't hunger for it in a self-serving way. If Loki is going to play a pivotal role in the movies, I hope his hero's ending is with Mobius. They could be guardians of the multiverse, preventing it from being caged and running completely amok.

Thank you - I love analyzing shows like this, so happy to oblige! That's something so lovely about this little corner of the fandom; it seems like every day I check the lokius tag, someone has a new comment or observation that's just amazing. 😄

There's definitely foreshadowing with that comment, absolutely. And I think the last episode even gave it two dimensions. Mobius just goes along with Loki's threat, and like you said, Mobius later is "happy to torch the place." And just, how great is it that Mobius remembered those words? Every little thing Loki did was always worth Mobius remembering. Ugh, that makes the finale hurt more... Anyway...I was thinking, the second dimension of that foreshadowing also makes it ironic, because Loki shifts course and doesn't want to burn it down once he knows everything that's at stake.

On that note then, how interesting is it that Mobius reaches that same kind of conclusion? Where Loki gets to see the universal implications of such a choice, Mobius sees the personal, for the people in the TVA. At least for now, none of these people have anywhere else to go. And when Ravonna's insistent that the TVA must be for some greater reason, Mobius doesn't immediately discount that, he proposes they "build it into something better." The last glimpse of Loki is running to find Mobius to fix it all, and the last glimpse of Mobius is him and B-15 manning the station selflessly. And as B-15 says, it's not about going back. The TVA won't be what it was...but it can be changed, still has a purpose, and neither of them will shirk the responsibility they have in leading that. And the way they end on "For all time." "Always." Love them.

I adore that entire balance phrase! Perfection, and so true. Yes, so much of the writing is inconsistent, so I will only wager to guess that the dynamic between Loki and Mobius was only intentional on the surface. It was necessary for Loki to be balanced by someone so that he could right himself from his starting state and kind of speedup, in a different way, the development of Sacred Timeline Loki. However, I think the heart of it - mainly from the acting and presentation of Loki and Mobius' bond - was not intentional by the writers and not to the degree that many of us in the audience embraced it, either. Though one has to wonder if it was greenlit because some higher ups did see that...I'm thinking of what iirc were some Feige quotes, here.

I too don't want Sylvie to be treated as a throwaway by the writers and I hope some of those highers ups in Marvel step in and change that. It is super dark for her to be left at the end of time by the writers. I mean, she has the wrist device, so she can and probably will leave the citadel (all contingent on her survival instincts kicking in, despite being devoid of a mission now), but as to us getting to see that...?

Personally, I would love to see her connect with Kid Loki and Croki. To kind of...find herself in that familial setting, find her after and explore what she wants, and transition on to that self-journey. Now with the universes converging, I hope Mobius and/or Sylvie go back to the Void for them and insist they join the world again. I understand why they didn't want to then, but they don't have Old Loki anymore, and the TVA is not going to stop them now from finding a home in the universe.

The reason I've thought about Sylvie having that journey with Kid Loki and Croki, actually, after meeting up somehow with Loki again and then parting ways with forgiveness - "another gesture of self-love", like you said, I totally agree and love that idea - is because I feel that's why we got Mobius in the house with the Lokis in the Void while Sylvie and our Loki were outside. I think Sylvie isolated herself. Kid Loki has a line like, "I hope they know what they're doing" to which I wonder, were they in there assuming that Loki and Sylvie were talking about how to enchant Alioth outside? Because that didn't happen. They weren't even talking, initially. Sylvie was clearly contemplating her car ride with Mobius.

Sylvie in those scenes felt so disconnected from the other Lokis. Which yes, highly likely to be a writing decision to make the romantic thing they were going for look less weird to the audience, but the way Sophia plays it, it feels like Sylvie doesn't feel she can belong or connect with them and doesn't try. And of course, romantic feelings or not, Loki wouldn't leave her to sit outside alone because he'd adopted her mission and taken on her purpose as substitute for any glorious purpose of his own.

So yeah, I don't expect the show to bring her back, but I hope they do so and do so in such a way that we get the hopeful not defeated self-acceptance that we see our Loki and Old Loki develop. And I just am warming to the idea of her and Kid Loki doing that together because Kid Loki's been to a very dark place of his own doing as well when he killed Thor. I cannot accept that he feels no regret about that - he totes around Croki like a baby, and was rolling with Old Loki, that's not an evil boy! And there's just such warm potential for found family dynamics among the Lokis, and that unconditional familial acceptance (and also a chance for sibling-like snark between Kid Loki and Sylvie, a bite they both seem to share) that would be such a shame to go to waste.

However, agreed, either outcome does feel fitting for a Loki... It's just a darkness vs hope choice for the writers to make regarding Sylvie. Another consideration for the dark Sylvie ending to make it more poignant is that she's the one who ran from their nature the most, arguably, and then suffers the most from her mission consuming her soul. Narratively, it does make an interesting juxtaposition imo that she ran and yet fell into ruin while our Loki was forced to confront everything and ends improved (at least, personally, not situation-wise yikes).

I also am super nervous about this new Mobius! Something that gets disregarded a lot in post-season fics is that when Loki was reeling from the Kang statue, Mobius gives up trying to get through to him and looks to be waving the Minutemen forward and turning away, shrugging off the situation? So, definitely, they would end up in a time theater again, right? Or something of the like. Which would at least give Loki time to think again. There's a great mirroring opportunity there, imo, where Loki can be the one entirely honest and calm in their 'first meeting' and Mobius is the one with confused questions and echoes Loki, all, "What exactly do you want with me?" Because Loki will be insistent that he and Mobius fix it. And Loki could even explain their friendship as Mobius seeing something in him no one else did, and that he has hope that all variations of Mobius will be at least half as good and kind and intelligent as the one he knew, and the fact that he hasn't already been pruned, he think he's right.... 🥺

Anyway! Yeah, I hope this Mobius takes a leap of faith on Loki and I think he will if he has even an ounce of those same inclinations, as you said. This Mobius does appear to be close to our Mobius, based on that final scene...he just doesn't have all the Loki reels inside his head. And yeah, the timeline of things is easy to forget. I think Loki has pivoted back to his true self of mischief and morbid curiosity (about destruction without evil intent?) with this series. I think he was ...freed, I guess, of a lot of his grudges and pain, knowing how that path ends in the Sacred Timeline, so it helped him get back in touch with those pre-corruption facets of himself.

He deserves that hero's ending! He has changed, and they've set him up perfectly to prove himself to others like Strange now too. I could totally see Loki and Mobius transitioning to these guardians of the multiverse type figures, with the TVA serving as a balance, like the record keepers and a defense force of the universe, as well as the courtroom and judges for truly exigent circumstances of like time travel issues. I freaking love that idea so much!! My heart actually hurts lol.

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genesisrose74 · 3 years

Text

Christmas with the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 1: Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita

Part 2 (Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita) here!!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Daichi

A huge romantic during Christmas, 10/10 quality cliche times spent together

You wanna go ice skating? Hell yeah sweetheart, he will make it the most beautifully romantic thing you’ve ever seen

Like straight out of a holiday postcard type beat

Istg the rink he takes you to looks like a more heartwarming version of Rockefeller Center

He’s a big keeper of tradition when it comes to making plans, but doesn’t mind a bit of nonsense fun when everything falls into place

Which is why you love to bring the team along on adventures because they make everything all the more entertaining

At first he’s confused like ??? You don’t have to do that just if they’ve been pestering you about it

But then he realizes you care as much about them as he does (hint: a hell of a lot) and they’re thus invited along for some stuff

Of course y’all also get some quality time together on dates with just you both

Anyways you and Daichi have talked a lot about traveling and how he was really interested in seeing new places

So as his gift you got him a carved map with a roll of red string and thumbtacks, so that he could plan out all the places he wanted to visit

You know how when Kiyoko found the “Fly” banner for Karasuno and all the boys cried?

Yeah

Like that but with lots more hugging and laughing

“You know you’re gonna have to help with mapping this out, right?”

“Is that an invitation I hear?”

“Oh, that’s a promise”

FJSFJDSK ALEXA PLAY AMERICAN BOY BY ESTELLE—

Please I love him; he is so damn sly and sassy I will die with this headcanon

Sugawara

I swear on everything that Christmas with him is equivalent to a Hallmark movie

It smells like joy and warmth wherever he is, and this season only amplifies it

He is such a cheeseball without even having to try

But it’s in the really endearing and heart-melting way,,, just MMM PERFECT

He’ll take you on a walk through those neighborhoods with those crazy light decorations in the front yard and buy you hot chocolate

If he sees a group of little kids gaping at all the lights, he’ll leave them starry-eyed with stories of magic, reindeer, Santa and so-forth

“You know, I’ve heard that Rudolph’s nose is supposed to be brighter than the world’s most powerful Christmas light”

Good heavens, children absolutely adore this man

Anyways he’ll make it a little game as y’all walk around this beautifully lit neighborhood, both of you with a different assortment of bingo squares printed on paper

First one to bingo chooses a movie to watch after getting back to Suga’s house

Will wrap a big fluffy blanket around you both and pull you into his chest while watching the movie

For his gift, you got a star named after him

It’s because y’all alway go stargazing for dates every month, just to sit out, talk and cuddle

Suga gave you the SOFTEST look after opening your gift and this cute little card you made 🥺

“Lets go try to find my new favorite star”

PLEASE HE IS SO SWEET

“Right now? Koushi it’s 11:30 pm”

“Just for ten minutes, and then I’ll get you home”

So y’all spend the rest of Christmas Eve on his roof, sipping warm tea and attempting to locate Star Suga

Asahi

Cuddle bear alert ‼️‼️

It’s basically hibernation time for him, because he’s not the biggest fan of cold

That’s alright with you though 😌 more coziness for you

Lots of quality moments indoors means more creative dates

A whole day devoted to chill present wrapping? Hell fuckin’ yeah

Nice music, pretty wrapping paper, shiny bows, maybe a little Christmas rom-com playing in the back — the whole shebang

You find out pretty quickly that despite how it sounds, it’s actually quite a satisfying and enjoyable pastime

Practically had to drag him out of your living room to secretly wrap his own gift

As much as he’s the king of timidity and soft™, he can be very playfully stubborn when he’s comfortable, hence why he was such an ass to get out of the room

I have no doubt that Asahi would melt for the most adorable, cheesy shit

So you not only bought him some really reliable headbands for volleyball use, but you also made a little coupon booklet

He can basically cash in paper promises for certain things, like getting to choose the next date idea, picking a movie to watch without any objection, having you make his favorite food, etc.

There’s one that he can exchange for a full out spa day trip, because good heavens he’s a sucker for those

Massage and exfoliation and everything — it makes him feel ✨refreshed✨

He was ecstatic fam, I don’t even know what to say

Like a puppy who just got a bunch of toys and a new backyard to play

Mans cashes in one almost immediately, and at first you’re confused

Like it’s Christmas time bubs, what are we gonna be able to do when most places are closed and it’s the holidays?

Then you read the paper

“Free hug (can be used and renewed <3)”

GIVE HIM HIS DAMN HUGS RIGHT NOW

He uses that one a lot throughout the upcoming days, to the point where he just keeps the paper on him for fun

“You realize you can just ask me silly, you don’t need to keep carrying the coupon around”

“Yeah, but it’s entertaining”

Cute little cheeky bastard

Nishinoya

LOVES LOVES LOVES CHRISTMAS

You know the 12 Days of Christmas? The song??

He gets you a small present EVERY DAY for all 12 days

Not to mention he has a big present that he saves for the actual holiday

Y’all are the type of couple to get ice cream in the middle of winter

Nishi loves his cold snacks any time of year, and you’ve thus picked up a similar taste

He will consistently pester you about what kind of present you got him

Gets pouty when you don’t tell him, but in the back of his mind he’s glad because it would ruin the surprise

Anything you get him instantly becomes his most prized gift tho

It could be a literal rock with googly eyes and he’d put it in a protective glass case for preservation

But of course you get him something better than that because he only deserves the best

He’s got this specific assortment of products to maintain his spiky hair and to make sure it’s healthy, but they’re pretty expensive to buy when he runs out

When he tore open your present’s decorative wrapping to discover a huge basket of basically every hair product he ever needed, he got wide-eyed

There was also a booklet of little notes you’d kept throughout the month that listed all the little things you noticed and adored about your precious boyfriend

He nearly CRIED reading them

“Baby, you didn’t have to do all that for me”

“You act like you don’t deserve all of it and more, Nishi”

Refuses to leave your side after that

Holding your hand, hugging you as tight as he can, etc.

He is head over heels idc idc

Tanaka

Another man who is obsessed with the holiday season and everything that comes with it

He is the biggest sap for this shit istg

Will spend hours trying to get you the best present of all time

And he succeeds exceptionally

Mistletoe? He’s got an ABUNDANCE on hand at any time, just to make sure he can get fair share of his kissies 🥰

His signature beanie appears in full force during winter

Sometimes you’ll pull it over his eyes before giving him a peck on the cheek and dashing off in the school halls

“I’ll see you after school, babe!”

Speech = jumbled + incomprehensible

“Uh hUh, you do that~”

He’s: adorable

I just know that he melts for really sweet and thought-out gifts

Like anything you give him he’ll adore, don’t get me wrong, but the ones done with special care and love are just his kryptonite

He brought you into a massive bear hug and spun you around when he opened a photo book of old pictures taken together, complete with lots of cute messages and anecdotes written alongside them

You and Saeko may have also gone in on another present for him without his knowledge

And on Christmas Eve, you dragged a curious Tanaka into his front yard to the sight of a shiny motorbike

It was Saeko’s old one that she’d held onto for a while, and an old schoolmate offered to fix it up nice in time for the holiday at a discount, so y’all decided to divvy up the lowered price and got it done for Ryu

Sweet boy was taken aback, with his hands clapped over his mouth and everything

Saeko patted him on the back as he stood there in shock, giving her baby brother a sweet smile

“All yours, little bro!”

Ya, Saeko fucking loves you 😌 and so does Tanaka

Overall very lovely, would cry to be loved by the Tanaka siblings

Ennoshita

After spending past Decembers with his fellow second year classmates (namely, the very enthusiastic Noya and Tanaka), he’s grown to know quite a bit about the different holiday events that go on around town

Still, Ennoshita is a pretty simplistic guy and is content with simply spending time with you

So when you recommended going to pick a Christmas tree out for your place together, he’s totally down

As long as he gets to help decorate too ☺️

Y’all end up picking a beauty of a tree ngl

It’s SO TALL

And a super stronk friend — fit for the most heavy duty of ornaments

It takes some damn work to get that bad boi inside and upright after driving back to your house

But like hell did that stop you

Now that it was all set up, sturdy, and given plenty of water, decorations were brought into the equation that same night

No rest until it’s all set up and looking mighty beautiful

Okay maybe some coffee breaks in between, but other than that the grind don’t stop ✋😤

Ennoshita is an expert at making Christmas trees look absolutely immaculate

Idk if it’s because he’s had to deal with cleaning up disorder for a while now?

Looking at you, ya second year loons

He just has the touch, fam

He’ll of course let you have input on which light colors, what type of ornaments, and so on

But honestly it’s really fun seeing him fully concentrated on making your tree the best it can be

He lets you on his shoulders to put on the tree topper 🥺

For his gift, Ennoshita really loves books, so you decided to get him 12 different (hardcover!!) stories — one for each month in a year

Along with a small sticky-note blurb on the covers of each to explain why you chose it, and to give similar title recommendations if he ends up enjoying

He was so surprised with how thoughtful and extensive it was

Loved it so much that he immediately started to read the first one, with you sat in his lap

“Chikara, you realize you’re meant to start this one in January?”

“Shh, I’m getting a head start”

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slashingdisneypasta · 2 years

Note

wich one are your favorites Disney villains?? :) and maybe why?

Oh thank you so much for this question and the excuse to gush about them! ^^

Cruella: Particularly, the Glenn Close version. I just find her to be so much fun to watch, and write for! She's so over the top, and just plain nasty, and it works. She's nuts, and evil, and for no particular reason?? She's just like that. I love it XD Plus... she's just... so... pretty... I cant... Honestly I get a very similar vibe looking at her as I do any Englund character, and I'm not sure why... these two can pull of stuff human beings should not be able.

Jafar: Probably my first villain crush, in general, so I'm very attached to him- even if, when watching now, he doesn't quite spark as much joy. Because I've over-watched the movie XD *Sweatdrop* He's just got the best villain laugh, and he's worldly, and operates with a super vocabulary (*Cough* the tried and true ingredients straight to my heart).

Hades: He's Hades. I loved this man, haha XD I had a drawing of him right next to BEN and Offender on my wall for a year. He's the reason I started writing for Disney Villains! I was just obsessed with him, for a long time. He has that complicated villain/heroine relationship with Meg that I've always loved, he's always annoyed at something yet he's not serious and grumpy all the time, he's very charismatic, and he's not... entirely... a bad person? Honestly? Like, if you aren't in the way of his goals and he didn't see you as beneath him (Cuz of the God, thing), he'd probably be chill towards you. I have over-watched Hercules though as well as Aladdin so he doesn't quite spark the same joy as before anymore unfortunately, haha XD But I still love him.

Ursula: BIG SEXY SEA WITCH WIFE- Sorry. Sorry. XDD I love her design, and I'm kinda jealous of her. In awe. She's allowed to be kind of gross, manipulative, and slightly perverted, and use these over-the-top expressions, while also being totally-comfortable-in-her-own-skin, and she pulls it off beautifully! I'm obsessed at the moment.

Scar: Aside from his design, which I love (Gosh, you should see my Lion King folder. I have so many more Scar screencaps then I do any other villain. Its not even a contest)- but he's also able to twist the sophisticated, sarcastic Older Man persona and wile Underdog one into 1 ultimate bastard man and I love it. I find it so much fun, so interesting. I'd love to write more of him, and I have some ideas.

Bonus- Rourke: ... that man awoke stuff in me- ANYWAY THOUGH. He's just very cool, man... I dunno. Like he said, he's very even-tempered, and he's never surprised. He doesn't take pull any punches, he's constantly tired of everyone around him, he's tough... I dunno. With Rourke its mostly me being unabashedly horny for him XD Ha ha...

Bisexual Nightmare.

~ Pixar and Disney Show's ~

Lots-'O'-Huggin' Bear: I could listen to his voice all day- and not, entirely, in an 'I'm attracted to it', kind of way. Its just so good. Between him and Chuckles in that movie, my ears had a blast of a time. Also I just love his character, he's so manipulative and two faced and southern. Every idea I get for Buckman, I wanna write for Lotso too.

Chick Hicks: What? Can? I? Say? I have a type. Honestly though Chick did repulse me for the first, like, 18 years of my life? But then Cars became a comfort movie due to some less then ideal incidents and I learnt to laugh at him and now I'm very fond of the bastard XD ^^

Jim Starling / Negaduck: HE'S SO FUCKING COOL. Like- oh my god. This is the kinda villain I signed up for in this life. He's so amusing to watch. The perfect mix of goofy, just genuinely a dickhead, and fucked up. Plus his design? Both of his voices?? He's my favourite. I love him a LOT. I'm so happy I was alive to see him in 2017 in the cleaned up animation and new origin story.

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link4eva · 3 years

Text

Kiro’s Culinary Date Translation [CN] (Season 2)

Hi, everyone! Just a couple of notes before you begin reading. I don’t actually know Chinese so this translation was done through the power of Google Translate and with help from @keliosyfan. Thank you! 💛

This translation contains spoilers for a date that has not yet been released in the ENG server. This date is set is Season 2 but doesn’t contain any major plot details. If you wish to not be spoiled, please don’t read beyond the cut.

Hope you enjoy!~

*Spoilers below for future content!*

[First Part]

“Ding Dong!--”

I stood in front of a villa full of sunflowers in the yard and rang the doorbell.

Recently, in order to create a gimmick for the new show, the company intends to let Kiro participate in an observation variety show.

The stars in the show will experience different professions. The profession of this episode is to run a restaurant. To create more entertainment, a culinary competition is also set up.

Whoever makes the food that receives the most praise will win the final prize.

But I wasn’t so sure about Kiro’s cooking skills….

??: I’m coming!

The familiar voice interrupted my thoughts.

Accompanied by a rush of hurried footsteps, the door was swung open and golden hair instantly came into view.

Kiro: Good afternoon, boss!

Kiro: I just saw your text message, why did you come to me so suddenly?

Kiro put one hand behind himself, his always-smiling face now even more enthusiastic.

A strange smell hit the tip of my nose. I seemed to distinguish something but kept it calm on the surface.

MC: I heard Savin say that you rarely go out recently and don’t answer the phone very often. So I just came to see what the situation was.

Kiro: So that’s what it was. That’s because….

Kiro moved his eyes towards me and smiled.

Kiro: I recently became obsessed with a new video game series so I couldn’t check my phone as often.

I nodded and accepted the explanation.

MC: There’s another thing; you’re going to be on a new variety show.

Kiro’s expression suddenly became very serious. I couldn’t help but want to tease him, pretending to be serious.

MC: You should have known already about your appearance on the show and how you need to show your cooking skills in front of the camera.

MC: But I don’t think this should be a problem for Kiro, right?

Kiro looked shocked. But not long after, he smiled confidently.

Kiro: Of course.

Kiro: I’m actually very good at cooking.

MC: So confident--

Kiro: What’s up?

Seeing Kiro’s confused eyes still showing a hint of a guilty conscience, I couldn’t help but finally express my doubts.

MC: Kiro, were you really playing video games?

Kiro: Yes, I was….

MC: But why do I smell something weird?

Kiro: ….

Kiro: ….So you knew already!

After a while, he sighed slightly, and put down his hands behind his back like he had accepted his fate. He was holding a bear apron in his hands.

Kiro: Miss Chips, do you want to come and take a look at my kitchen?

[Second Part]

Although I was mentally prepared when I walked into Kiro’s kitchen, I couldn’t help but look on in shock.

The kitchen utensils are stacked in a mess, there are many broken eggshells on the ground, and the dishes were piled high in the sink. With that, there were also some “unidentifiable objects”...

Everything in front of me seems to show what kind of “messy” experience this was.

Kiro also looked a little embarrassed.

Kiro: Ahem, it went well at first, but I don’t know which step went wrong.

Kiro: The taste and appearance are a little bit different from what you may expect….

Suddenly, he turned his eyes to look at me.

Kiro: In order to find out which step went wrong, I plan to do it again!

Kiro: However, it’s best to have personal supervision next to you….

MC: I can help you. Also, I can show you some new things. *changed some wording*

As if he had obtained the answer he wanted, Kiro’s brows and eyes were curved slightly, and a smile appeared on his face.

Kiro: Great, then let’s get to work!

Seeing a glimmer of success in his eyes, I suddenly realized that I was fooled!

He had planned to bring me to the kitchen all along!

Twenty minutes later, with my help, the cooking was finally completed decently.

Seeing the steaming food on the table, Kiro couldn’t wait to pick up the spoon and took a bite.

MC: How is it?

Kiro: Hmm….

He blinked and then gave me a thumbs up.

Kiro: Super delicious! Miss Chips should really consider opening up a restaurant!

Although I knew his evaluation was exaggerated, I still breathed a sigh of relief.

MC: That’s good.

Kiro: However, I’m afraid there’s no way I can make such delicious food for the time being….

He lowered his eyes and his long eyelashes cast a small shadow in his eyes.

Knowing that Kiro has always been a perfectionist, I thought about it and spoke slowly.

MC: Actually, to make delicious food in addition to certain cooking skills, you also need a special recipe.

Kiro: Huh? What is it?

I stretched out my hand, poked Kiro’s face lightly with my finger, and made a smile on his face.

MC: The chef’s mentality is also very important.

MC: If you put yourself in a happy mood, you will definitely feel it. And….

I also smiled at him.

MC: Enthusiastically greet every challenge, isn’t this what Kiro is best at?

Kiro was taken aback for a moment, a strange emotion flashed in his eyes. After a while, he smiled and took my hand.

Kiro: Well, MC is right.

Kiro: By the day of the show recording, my performance won’t disappoint anyone’s expectations.

Kiro: However, I still want you to promise me one thing.

MC: What?

He leaned closer, his warm breath fell on my cheek.

Kiro: Can you come to the set on the filming day?

Kiro: If you do, I think the food will be better than perfect.

[Third Part]

The sun was shining brightly on the filming day, and the temperature was several degrees higher than usual.

I arrived at the shooting location as agreed with Kiro. Seeing that it was still early, I walked towards the lounge.

(Cut to lounge)

As soon as the door was opened, I saw him sitting on the sofa alone and intently looking down at his phone.

Hearing the movement, Kiro raised his eyes to look at me with undisguised joy on his face.

Kiro: ….MC, there you are!

MC: Well, I’m here to cheer for you.

He subconsciously turned off the phone screen. Although it was just a quick glance, I saw that he seemed to be watching a cooking tutorial.

Kiro: The sun is so nice today, it’s good weather to go out in.

Kiro: There should be a lot of customers in the restaurant later.

Kiro looked out the window, his face thoughtful.

MC: Well, you don’t have to put too much pressure on yourself. After all, this is a variety show, and cooking is only one aspect.

MC: So all you have to do is show your truest appearance and enjoy the process.

Kiro: I know, it’s just that I haven’t figured out what to do yet….

MC: Huh? You haven’t thought about it yet?

MC: Didn’t we practice a dish at your house last time?

Kiro: But….

Kiro paused. After a while, he seemed to have thought of something, his lips raised in a beautiful arc.

Kiro: But now I have changed my mind.

Kiro: I’m going to keep it a secret for now and surprise you later.

Although there were some doubts in my mind, I also believed Kiro could handle it well. So, after a while, I nodded.

MC: Ok.

MC: If you have any questions, you can send me a text message and I will be there later. Also….

Kiro: Don’t worry, Miss Chips, I have my own coup.

Kiro took my hand and interrupted me with a chuckle.

Kiro: And have you forgotten? No matter what kind of food, I have my own “exclusive recipe”. *changed some wording*

As he said this, he poked my cheek lightly as I did to him before, and also sketched a smile on my face.

Kiro: I will get the best result while enjoying the process.

His eyebrows are curved and my figure is reflected in his clear pupils.

Kiro: So, please wait and see.

(Cut to shooting location)

The bright sunlight passed through the leaves. *changed some wording*

The show officially started filming. Stars who usually have a certain distance from the public are now wearing aprons and running an ordinary restaurant.

I was sitting on a seat in the restaurant and found that the surrounding area was filled with people.

Seeing popular movie stars or idol singers passing by one after another, many guests showed surprised expressions.

Female Star: Hello, this is my chocolate cake.

The female star gave me a sweet smile and the dessert on my table. After thanking her, I took a bite and the sweetness instantly melted in my mouth.

Girl A: Wow, this cake is delicious!

Girl B: Is it? I’ll try it too.

The voices of the two girls from the table over fell into my ears. I glanced around and saw that many people seemed to be very satisfied with the food.

Girl A: The celebrities’ culinary skills are so good too!

Girl B: You’re so stereotypical. By the way, I heard that Kiro is also here. Our “Little Sun’s” cooking skills are guaranteed to surprise you!

Hearing the girl’s words, I couldn’t help but glance at my phone screen. The last text message sent was from Kiro ten minutes ago.

“I’m ready to play!”

I put down the spoon in my hand and couldn’t help but guess what kind of food Kiro intends to make….

After tasting different delicacies one after another, everyone’s expectations were getting higher and higher.

Initially, I just advised Kiro not to be too stressed out but I couldn’t help but feel nervous at this moment….

??: This guest, would you like a delicious mango smoothie?

A familiar voice rang in my ears and I turned my face to meet a pair of sky-blue eyes.

MC: Ki-!

Everyone: AAAAAAHHH IT’S KIRO!!!

The enthusiastic cheers drowned out my voice.

Kiro smiled brightly at them and the screams suddenly became louder. Immediately afterwards, he suddenly turned around, avoiding everyone’s gaze--

He gave a wink towards me.

I couldn’t help but feel my heart beat frantically.

The golden light shone on Kiro’s hair and the person in front of me seemed to be more dazzling than the sun.

Kiro: I saw that you’re sitting there all alone. Don’t you feel a bit lonely?

Before I could answer, he took off the bear doll from his waist and placed it on the seat opposite me.

Kiro gently covered the microphone pinned in the collar and whispered in a voice that only the two of us could hear--

Kiro: Let it temporarily replace me to accompany you.

As soon as his voice fell, he straightened up and looked at the people present.

Kiro: Does anyone else want to try a refreshing fruit smoothie?

The sun was shining, and after tasting many dishes, everyone happened to be a little thirsty. So, they raised their hands enthusiastically.

Kiro: Just hold tight, I’ll come back right away!

Holding the tray, he walked towards the other table of guests. In the scorching afternoon, Kiro’s fruit smoothie became the most popular dish.

Looking at the blond boy walking through the crowd, I couldn’t help but curl my lips up into a smile.

It turns out that this is what he meant by “coup”.

Looking down, I saw Kiro with one hand behind him, making a “V” gesture in my direction.

My smile grew even more. I picked up the mango smoothie on the table and took a sip.

--The taste is really sweet.

[Fourth Part]

As the sunset slowly falls, the shooting is gradually coming to an end.

According to the process, the program team will determine the final prize based on the customers’ evaluation of the food. As a result, the awards were announced one by one with suspension--

Kiro didn’t win.

Kiro: MC!

I looked towards where the voice came from and saw that from not far away, Kiro was walking towards me through the staff surrounding him.

MC: Is it finished?

Kiro: Well, they’re checking out the shooting material.

I thought that Kiro would be a little disappointed if he didn’t win the prize but his face didn’t show the slightest bit of disappointment. Instead, his smile remained the same as usual.

A light flashed before my eyes and I realized that he was holding a golden trophy in his hand.

MC: What is this?

Kiro: This….

He followed my gaze and winked slyly at me suddenly.

Kiro: There are too many people here. Let’s talk about it somewhere else.

(Cut to lounge)

MC: “Most Popular Award….”

In the lounge, I took the trophy from Kiro and repeated what he said.

Kiro: That’s right.

Kiro: They said that because of the popularity of “Kiro’s Special”, the program team made this award.

Kiro: I told you that I wouldn’t break my promise, right?

Kiro said somewhat proudly. I can’t help but smile.

MC: Well, I was a little surprised. But I know that Kiro never disappoints.

MC: By the way, something hasn’t been returned to you yet.

I took out the little bear doll that I had always taken with me. I wanted to give it back to him but he shook his head.

Kiro: This was actually a gift to you to thank you for teaching me how to cook.

MC: In that case, I will accept it without any hesitancy.

As I was talking, a question suddenly came to my mind.

MC: I don’t seem to remember you telling me why you suddenly decided to make a smoothie instead?

Kiro gave me a look and smiled helplessly.

Kiro: When I tell you, you mustn’t laugh at me.

MC: Of course not.

Kiro: Actually, after we started cooking together that day, I practiced many times in private.

Kiro: After all, I’m going to be on the show. I hope that no matter what I’m doing, I can let everyone see my best.

Kiro: But that last time, I still felt that it was not enough.

Kiro’s tone was indifferent but I seemed to hear a little reluctance from it.

Kiro: But after coming to the lounge today, I saw the light outside was very strong.

Kiro: Thinking of everyone sitting in the sun all that time, it must’ve felt a little hot. So, I suddenly came up with an idea.

Those bright blue eyes lit up again and the corners of Kiro’s lips curled up slightly.

Kiro: I think if it were me in this hot weather, I would want a refreshing smoothie more than one of those meals.

Kiro: And this method was a very simple one--

Kiro: It was within the scope of my cooking skills!

I couldn’t help laughing.

I saw that the name tag on his chest was a little crooked, so I stretched out my hand to fix it for him.

MC: So, our “Chef Kiro” decided to make a smoothie?

MC: It was indeed a great idea.

I nodded approvingly. Kiro’s eyes flickered slightly and he suddenly took my wrist.

Kiro: Speaking of which, you brought me this inspiration.

MC: Huh?

Kiro: Didn’t you say that if you put yourself in a happy mood, other people will definitely be able to feel it?

Kiro: Because I was inspired by you, I gradually began to worry less about satisfying everyone and more about what to do to make myself feel satisfied….

Kiro: Therefore, this trophy is also yours.

Kiro winked as he spoke and his lips curled up softly.

Kiro: I wonder how Miss Chips would rate my performance today?

MC: Do you need to ask?

MC: Of course it far exceeds full marks!

Kiro: Even if I didn’t make good enough food?

MC: Even if you didn’t make good enough food.

I repeated it with certainty.

MC: Remember, because you have the most unique “recipe”.

MC: That is Kiro’s signature appeal.

I smiled at him.

MC: During the filming, many people including myself, were affected by your smile and enthusiasm--

MC: It was such a pleasant afternoon.

MC: I believe that this happy mood will be conveyed to all viewers when the show is broadcasted.

MC: Rest assured.

The light in Kiro’s eyes shook slightly and then the corners of his mouth rose even more.

Kiro: Is MC’s evaluation of me that high?

Kiro: Actually, it’s more than that.

Kiro: In fact, there are other “exclusive recipes” that I found.

He pretended to smile mysteriously, held my hand more tightly, and then went on to say--

Kiro: She not only taught me how to cook, but she also gave me great inspiration;

Kiro: And she also told me that no matter what challenge I encounter, I can solve it in Kiro’s fashion as usual.

Kiro: So, when I saw her at the shooting today, I felt confident and smiled uncontrollably….

The gentle voice fell in my ears and I felt my heart beat faster.

Those sapphire eyes looked at me for a moment. In the next second, a chuckle came into my ear--

Kiro: So….

Kiro: For me, she is the recipe that makes everything more perfect.

[End]

You can read the call that comes after this date here!~

#mlqc spoilers #mr love queens choice #mr love #mr love game #mlqc #mlqc kiro #mr love kiro #mr love dream date #周棋洛 #date translation #he's so cute

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