#it’s interesting to see how his style has developed from those times

[hyunpic]

#hyunjin #🧼 #it’s interesting to see how his style has developed from those times #the way he signed it with the smiley face 😭 so cute… #also his love for roses is so endearing to me it’s all about love to him 🙇🏼‍♀️❤️

[byers-bowlcut]

I've seen people say El likes the IDEA of having a boyfriend more than she actually likes her own boyfriend, and jfc it's so true 😭 Like it's all over the show:

Season 1

She's initially attached to Mike because he's the first person to give her shelter, food, genuine human care and just,, not calling CPS immediately. Her feelings for him was born from trauma and dependency in season 1. And throughout the rest of the 3 seasons, we don't see it grow past that.

Also I think it's noticeable in S1 that:

She was uninterested when Mike tried to share his hobbies with her

She also did not seem to mind AT ALL when she questioned if Mike could be her brother. He voice is neutral and curious here, not the least bit repulsed by the thought of being siblings with Mike, like girl does not care 😭

Season 2

This season has zero onscreen moments of Mike and El actually getting to know each other further. They were separated nearly the whole season.

What we DO see:

El's attachment and dependency on Mike that was developed from S1

We also find out how El spent a year of her life watching melodramatic romance films. Many other middle schoolers might identify that relationships in real life don't work like those films. But El is fresh out of lab life, she's literally learning the world through this TV, and has now become obsessed with the IDEA of having a boyfriend/relationship just like that.

Season 3

Again, no onscreen moments of El showing interest in who Mike is as a person.

The very first scene we see of them, she's trying to get him to stop singing along to the song they're listening to. She seems to like kissing Mike. But isn't shown enjoying anything actually characteristic about him, like sharing interests with him such as music.

Hopper indicates that they don't do anything meaningful together either. We see here that before hanging out with Max, El had little sense of her own style, her hobbies, her interests- meaning spending time with Mike for months probably didn't involve many talking points did it?

Also in season 3, El dumps Mike with ZERO hesitation. Then she has the time of her life with Max. The most acknowledgment we get that she's oh so heartbroken is a small frown to Max that her and Mike aren't on best terms. And even that doesn't seem so paramount cause 1 episode later she totally dismisses Mike after he explains how Hopper threatened him. She just tells him maybe Hopper was right 😭😭

It's literally ONLY once she starts becoming in danger that she starts clinging onto him again. I feel like we've seen this film before hm.

Like where are any signs that she likes Mike as an individual, and is falling for who he really is, rather than simply being attached due to trauma, and liking the concept of doing romantic things (ie: kissing, dancing at the ball, etc.)

Season 4

This is the season it becomes the MOST OBVIOUS: El loves the concept of a happy relationship and being loved, but not really loving Mike for who he is. And bringing in Will's feelings just emphasizes this point.

To start, El continues doing all these relationship-y things that she did in the start of S3. She has Mike's name and pictures plastered all over her room. She makes a "Mike box" with his pictures decorated all over it. But the thing is: this is all sort of a façade at this point. We know she's BEEN unhappy with him for months ("From Mike! From Mike! From Mike!"). But with all these items, she's basically trying to convince herself that she's in this happy, fantasy, movie-like relationship, like she probably watched in hopper's cabin in season 2.

And then, there's the sheer difference between her and WILL in their feelings for Mike. We see it right off the bat when Mike comes to the airport: Will and El both have plans to give Mike something.

Will plans to give him a painting he worked extremely hard on. The painting is a connection of what they BOTH love: DnD, and it includes their friends who also play the game. It's very personal and immediately touches Mike. What's more is, the painting illustrates the exact qualities about Mike that Will loves: his leadership, his bravery, his guidance. This painting literally spells out to us that Will truly loves Mike for WHO HE IS.

Meanwhile, El plans on giving Mike a fun reunion date. She has the whole day planned out. And immediately: we see that what she wants to do doesn't actually takes Mike's interests and personality into consideration. You can see and hear the strain in his voice when he talks about "burritos for breakfast" 😬

You can see how he's not that relaxed at rinkomania, and nervous about skating, saying he's clumsy. He probably would've much preferred movies and playing a board game, over skating. But El has her own ideas. When she brings Mike to rinkomania, she tries to act really cool about it. She wants to impress him, wants to seem like she fits in and belongs.

Her present was never actually ABOUT Mike, and about loving Mike that she would plan this huge date for him. Her present was about her desperately wanting to have this cool date like every other normal teen girl might, with a normal boyfriend, and make it seem like they have a happy perfect relationship.

And then finally we reach their S4 fight. I find it extremely interesting how Hopper's cabin is framed in the background during their whole fight. It's almost like an indication that her desperate need to be loved by Mike stems from her trying to cope with losing Hopper and the hole left by him, that clearly did not exist when she happily dumped Mike in S3.

In their fight, when the topic of bullying comes up, Mike says he understands her, but El is quick to say he doesn't. She thinks Mike doesn't understand her, but this is just as much her not understanding HIM as well.

She doesn't get the extent of Mike's insecurities (definitely partially a result of bullying), something that Mike later divulges to WILL and not her. If the writers wanted to show us how much El understands Mike and loves him for who he is, her and Mike would work through his insecurities in their rs together, NOT through a middle man.

Overall it's pretty striking that we've never once heard El actually compliment Mike, or articulate, or even show what exactly she loves about him through four whole seasons. I mean...

Attachment to him due to trauma or grief =/= loving him for who he is.

Wanting to BE loved =/= loving him for who he is.

So really in terms of a relationship, what El ACTUALLY wants is the concept/idea of a regular boyfriend, and a happy easy relationship, all in an attempt to feel normal. And that's why we see them fall apart the way they do in season 4, and why Will is currently so involved. Because Will DOES see and love Mike for exactly who he is.

#eleven hopper #mike wheeler #will byers #byler #analysis on el's character and her feelings for mike #anti mileven #stranger things

[yoon-kooks]

on mute | jjk

🦈pairing: fuckboy!gamer!jjk x reader

🦈genre: friends to lovers, office!au, coworker!au, smut, fluff

🦈summary: You always assumed your handsome coworker was down to fuck anyone in the office except for you. He always assumed you weren’t interested in a guy like him. And both of you were content with never admitting your feelings… until he unknowingly confides in you in the realms of a certain tactical FPS game.

🦈word count: 10.7k

🦈warnings: mutual pining, shooter game references, soft fuckboy vibes, fingering, doggy style, protected sex bc bro aint taking no chances🤠

a/n: i wasnt planning on including smut so thats a bonus✨

You press a hand to your mouth to suppress a yawn as the department meeting finally comes to an end. Your boss had gone over the schedule for next quarter, alluded to a few new projects, and gave a few shoutouts to people on your team who apparently “went the extra mile” this week. You couldn’t care less about being acknowledged for your work, but it does kind of irk you that Jeon Jungkook got a shoutout when you’ve never seen him do extra work in the office. All he’s done this week is take your pretty lady boss out to lunch. If that’s considered extra work, you suppose Jungkook works the hardest. After all, he’s the type to make time for anyone he wants to sleep with aka everyone in the office except for you.

As you scoot your chair out, you back into something very solid. Surely no one is dumb enough to stand right behind your chair when they know how eager everyone is to get out of here for the weekend. But when you turn around, you know exactly who it is without even seeing his face—Employee of the Week Jeon Jungkook. 

You stare at the back of his shoulders in that mustard button-down, and it occurs to you that it was his nice ass that you’d bumped into. He didn’t even stumble forward from the impact or at least step aside so you can leave like everyone else. You just want to get home, soak in a nice hot bubble bath, and play a few games with your calico all curled up in your lap—that’s the ideal Friday night that Jeon Jungkook is keeping you from.

“Excuse me, kind sir,” you say as your nude acrylics tap the armrest.

The boy turns around with fake astonishment. And a handsome smile. “Oh, Y/N, I didn’t know you were still here.”

“I mean, yeah, I’d be gone too if someone wasn’t blocking my way out.” In the year that you’ve been on the same team as Jungkook, the two of you somehow developed this sarcastic and aggressive way of speaking without actually being mad at each other. Some call it banter, but you dislike the possible romantic implications of that.

“What’s the rush? Got plans tonight?” He still doesn’t move out of the way. You didn’t expect him pinning you against a table in the office to be so underwhelming. You imagine a fuck boy like him could try a little harder, be a little rougher. Not that you’ve ever fantasized about it.

“Yeah, I just bought some cute new lingerie for when I hop into bed with Christina Lauren and my cat.” You leave out the gaming part of your Friday night plans. If he knew you played the same game as him, he’d probably use it against you somehow.

“Who’s Christina Lauren?” he asks. You love the thought of him imagining you in lingerie with some mystery woman. Or maybe that’d just encourage a threesome.

“My cat’s favorite romance writer?” You say it like it should be common sense to know that your cat purrs himself to sleep when you read to him.

“And you’re going to waste your cute new lingerie on reading a Lauren Christina bedtime story to your cat?”

“It’s Christina Lauren, not Lauren Christina.”

“Christina Lauren doesn’t care about your lingerie.” It amuses you how he keeps bringing up the lingerie. You wonder what he’d think if he saw you in that skimpy mesh fabric. It’d probably come as a shock to him considering he’s only ever seen you in your preppy office attire. He has no idea what you’re capable of beneath those cream blouses and mocha mini skirts.

If only he knew.

“Tldr, yes I have very urgent plans tonight.” That reminds you, you need to check your in-game shop to see if any pretty skins are on sale this time around. You’ve been eyeing the one with the cute whale shark design.

“What a coincidence, Lauren Christina is my favorite writer too. I really liked that one book she wrote.” You don’t hate that he’s prolonging the conversation, but if he says “Lauren Christina” one more time, you’re gonna report him to HR.

“Same,” you chuckle. “Now please move so I can leave.”

He finally steps aside. Before he can pull a fast one and trap you again, you throw your tiny bag over your shoulder and scurry for the exit. You stop just outside the conference room and spin around. The boy’s eyes quickly shift up from your skirt.

“Coming or not?” you ask with a head tilt. If there’s one good thing about having a local fuck boy in the office, it’s that you always have someone who’ll walk you to your car when it’s dark out. That’s one of the things you know he does just for you.

On the elevator ride down, it’s just you and him because everyone else has already vacated the building. You sneak a peek at your handsome colleague. It’s a shame that he spends more time in your coworkers’ beds than in actual relationships. If not for that, you’d—

“You should recommend a book for me,” he says, catching you mindlessly staring at him. Oops.

“You don’t look like a reader.” You doubt he’d ever pick up a book over girls.

“I’ll read a book if you say it’s good.” Now he’s just sweet talking you, and you’re not going to fall for it. Except, you would love someone to gush to about your favorite books.

“Dating You/Hating You.” The book title just sort of slips out of your mouth. Though you can’t exactly vouch for how good it is since it’s the one you’re currently reading.

“Give me your best elevator pitch for it.” Haha, he thinks he’s so funny. (You laugh anyway.)

Persuasion is your thing, but you can’t give a proper elevator pitch for a book you haven’t actually finished yet. Moreover, you don’t know what kinds of genres he’d be into or if this book would be a good fit for him. You don’t even know any of his interests outside of sex and video games. 

When you really think about it, there’s not much you know about Jeon Jungkook. He’s a mystery, but a charming one.

“It’ll give us something to talk about,” you say softly as the loud ding interrupts. “That’s my elevator pitch to you.”

“Not bad,” he nods as you both exit the elevator. That was way easier than expected. “Is it by your cat’s favorite romance author?”

“It is,” you smile. It’s hard not to smile when you’re with him. “I can lend you my copy next week after I fin—”

“Jungkook!” The new recruiting coordinator blocks your way out of the building with eager eyes and a smile brighter than your own. “Still down for drinks later at that place we talked about?”

You try not to roll your eyes as you step around yet another coworker who ignores you standing right next to the boy they want to ask out. You and Jungkook aren’t a thing, but it does hurt to know that not a single person thinks of you as worthy competition. He’s probably made it very clear to everyone in the office that you and him are just friends and that your nightly walks to the parking lot are for safety purposes only.

Thankfully, you get out of the building before you can hear Jungkook accept the invitation into someone else’s bed. The last thing you want is to be jealous of the people he’d rather be spending time with. You and your silly little book recommendations mean nothing to him.

Nothing at all.

“Sorry about that.” He catches up to you a minute later in the dimly lit parking lot.

You shake your head. “It’s alright. That’s what happens when you’re the popular guy.” And you mean it, too. You’re not the type to fault people for being who they are, nor would you ever ask them to change for you. Besides, there’s really nothing between you and him. There’s nothing he should feel sorry for.

“Hey, why do you always park in the furthest corner of the parking lot?” he teases, probably as a way to change the subject. You see his car parked just a few spots down from you, so he doesn’t really have a right to criticize your decisions. Looks like your habit has rubbed off on him. “It’d be safer if you parked closer to the building.”

You shrug even though the parking placement and slightly longer walks are intentional. He doesn’t need to know it’s your subtle way of prolonging the time you spend with him. You always look forward to those few extra minutes where he’s all yours.

“It doesn’t feel dangerous here at all.” Not when you’re with him. You unlock your car and hop into the driver’s seat.

“Yeah, totally not dangerous.” Jungkook holds your door as he scans the dark and empty lot for anything suspicious. He listens as a few sirens screech in the distance and does a double-take at the lone soda can rolling around in the wind. When the coast is clear, he turns back to you. “I look forward to reading the Lauren Christina book when your cat’s done with it.”

He waits for your seatbelt to click before closing the door. You roll the window down and glare. “It’s Christina Lauren! And have fun on your date.”

With a wave of your manicure, you’re off to your “urgent” Friday night plans.

When you return home, you get what you want. You strip off your work clothes and soak in a lavender bubble bath for a good 30 minutes before admiring the new lingerie Jungkook wouldn’t stop mentioning earlier. 

It’s tempting to try it on now, but you wish someone else could see it on you. Jungkook is right. Christina Lauren doesn’t care about your lingerie. If the boy were here to see it for himself, you want to know what he’d think, what he’d say, and what he’d do to your body. It’d probably be incredible—for one night—but that’d be the end of it. That’s how all of his flings go, and a hypothetical one with you would be no different. With a sigh, you set the lingerie aside, throw on an oversized sweatshirt that just barely covers your ass, and load into your game.

The first thing you do is check the shop for the cute gun skin with the whale shark design. The RNG gods give you a couple of good knives, an awful pistol, a subpar rifle, and no shark. It’s fine, you tell yourself. You didn’t want to spend real money on pretty pixels anyway.

As soon as your first match starts, your four teammates are quick to use their mics. Apparently, they all know each other. Can’t relate.

“So… How’d the date go?” asks the healer. The two duelists place their bets on whether the date went incredibly well or horribly wrong. You silently cast your vote for horribly wrong since you lean toward pessimism.

“I didn’t end up going,” says the initiator. He sounds a lot like a certain Jeon Jungkook, but you shouldn’t assume. As far as you know, he doesn’t have a reason to cancel the date with that recruiting coordinator. In fact, he should be having drunk sex with her right about now. Not that it’s any of your business to know what your handsome coworker does after hours. None of that involves you.

“Is it because of You-know-who?” asks the duelist who voted with you. You-know-who? Like a jealous ex-lover? Sounds like drama to you.

“Yep…” Nah, it can’t be the Jeon Jungkook you know. This guy’s voice is giving you more lovesick puppy than confident fuck boy. He dies from a grenade and goes silent for the next few rounds while his buddies keep providing intel to the team. You pick up the whale shark gun over his dead body.

“Hey, CL,” the healer calls out your username. “Do you have a mic?”

Yes, you do have a mic. No, you’re not going to use it. These guys seem harmless so far, but it’s not always fun when people realize you’re the only female on the team. Men in this game try to hit on you just like the ones you pass in the short distance from the office to your car. And they’ll only stop pestering you if you’re walking next to a guy like Jungkook, which you clearly don’t have in this game with your empty friend list. So you’d rather stay on mute for now.

“my mic is broken,” you type, “cat knocked it over.”

“Ah, that’s okay.” He heals you up and saves you from an otherwise fatal headshot. “We were just wondering if you could help our buddy out.”

You? You’re not sure how you’re supposed to be of any help to a lovesick puppy when you haven’t had much luck in the love department either. But you are a curious kitten when it comes to other people’s love lives.

“maybe… can i get more context?”

Apparently, this lovesick puppy (or “Jklmnop” according to his username) has a little more in common with Jungkook than you’d originally thought. Turns out both of them are the designated fuck boys at their workplaces. Except this one has a massive crush on his “super hot” colleague. Jeon Jungkook would never.

The issue is that Jklmnop caught feelings for the one person who doesn’t seem interested in him. Worse, it feels like he’s being friendzoned. And he’s been going on dates with other people in an attempt to squash those unrequited feelings, but it’s just not doing the trick.

“i know a fuck boy too.” You are by no means an expert in the fuck boy archetype, but perhaps your time spent with Jungkook has prepared you for this opportunity to help a friend in need. And you do have some advice. “im not saying fucking all your coworkers is a bad thing but if you really want this girl you need to go all in on her and show her that you’re willing to commit to something more serious.”

Because if you knew this to be true about your own local fuck boy, you’d give him a chance, too. But as far as you know, Jungkook has never shown any romantic interest in you (or anyone else for that matter). He’s just a platonic buddy to you and a fuck buddy to everyone else.

“and it’s very possible she doesnt even realize youre interested in her,” you type, “this is a dumb question but have you tried asking her out yet?”

Your dumb question gets a few laughs from the boys. You feel like an IT person asking their client if they’ve tried turning their computer off and on again.

“Oh, our guy here doesn’t ask people out. He’s the one getting asked out all the time,” Duelist #1 explains.

“It’s been a year and You-know-who hasn’t made a move on him, so that must mean she doesn’t like him,” Duelist #2 adds in a sarcastic tone. You imagine him rolling his eyes on the other side of his screen.

“well @Jklmnop if you dont normally ask ppl out, itll hold more weight when you do.” Your fingers pause for a second. Maybe you’re just soft, but it’d mean a lot to you if you were asked out by the Jeon Jungkook. You’re sure this fuck boy could pull it off too. “you should ask her out. maybe shes waiting for you to make the move.”

You don’t get an immediate response, but he trades his pretty shark gun for your plain one. He must have seen you steal the one over his dead body a few rounds ago. What a thoughtful guy.

Then a friend request pops up. Fine. Jklmnop can be the one username on your otherwise empty friend list.

“I’ll ask her if the opportunity arises,” Jklmnop says after clutching a 1v4. “Thanks bro.”

On Monday, you’re a lot sleepier than you should be at the beginning of the work week because you practically spent the entire weekend gaming with your new fuck boy friend and finishing the book you recommended to your office fuck boy friend.

Your dark circles must be pretty bad because Jungkook feels the need to stop by your desk and say, “Up all night reading Lauren Christina?” He taps the book on your mousepad, so he can clearly see that it’s Christina Lauren and not Lauren Christina. He’s just teasing you at this point.

“It’s Christina Lauren, you shithead. And yes, I finished it, so you can read it now,” you say, handing the book to the boy. He holds it with a soft grip as if to avoid creasing the pages. If library books were treated with the same care, they wouldn’t feel so crusty all the time. You can respect guys with gentle hands. “I expect a full book report by Friday.”

“At least give me the weekend,” he frowns. It’s the most attractive frown you’ve ever seen.

“Sure, if that’s how you want to spend your weekend,” you yawn. Wouldn’t he rather be doing anything else on his days off than read your book?

“That’s how you spent your weekend, Sleepyhead.” He makes a good point. His chuckle is quite cute too. 

As he flips through the book, you see something shimmery wedged between the pages toward the end of the story. You told yourself a million times to take your silly little bookmark out before lending him the book, but of course you forgot. Maybe he won’t notice.

Unfortunately for you, Jungkook pulls the metallic blue bookmark out to examine it. His lips curve upward when he sees it’s shaped like a whale shark. Oh great. He’s definitely gonna tease you about it. You knew you should’ve gone with one of the more sophisticated leather bookmarks.

“You really like these guys, huh.” He holds it up by the chain to let some light shine through the tiny holes mimicking the shark’s gorgeous spotty pattern. Not the reaction you were expecting, but you’ll take it.

“What makes you say that?” You don’t ever recall confiding in him about your whale shark obsession. Last time you checked, all of your nerdy and kiddish quirks were kept far away from your office. It’s just not on-brand for the professional image you’ve established here.

“Didn’t you have a cute whale shark phone case when you first started working here? Before you switched it to that cream-colored one?” He wrinkles his face, deep in thought as he tucks the bookmark back where he found it. He’s right, though. You just assumed no one had ever noticed it. As soon as you got your new work phone, you switched to something more neutral to fit your minimalist aesthetic.

“Oh, right.” You’d forgotten about the case just like you forgot about the bookmark. But Jungkook somehow notices and remembers those kinds of details about you. It’s almost endearing in a way.

You shouldn’t let yourself think like that, though. Those are dangerous thoughts.

“By the way, how was your date?” As much as you hate to admit it, you’re curious about his date with the recruiting coordinator. Besides, if he says it went well, you’ll have yet another reason to stop holding onto the tiny feelings you have for him.

“I didn’t go.”

“Oh,” you press a finger to your parted lips. That’s unheard of for Jeon Jungkook. “Did her cat die or something?”

“Why does someone’s cat need to die for the date to be canceled?”

“There must’ve been a pretty big emergency for you to forgo a date, no?”

“Is that what you really think of me, Y/N?” He cocks his head to the side because he’s a fuck boy and that’s what fuck boys do.

“That’s not what I think of you.” Another yawn slips from your mouth. “It’s just facts. You have a 99% attendance rate when it comes to dates, don’t you?”

He nods because he can’t argue with the credible gossip that goes on in your office.

“Anyway, I’m going to run to that coffee shop you won’t shut up about,” he says as he glances at the time on his phone and then at the dark abyss under your eyes. “Need anything?”

“Hmm…” You pretend to think deeply about your order. Usually when other people go on coffee runs, you request something easy to remember like an oat latte. But for Jeon Jungkook, the boy who keeps fucking up Christina Lauren’s name, you won’t go so easy. “How about an iced birthday cake latte with oat milk, an extra shot of espresso, two pumps of toffee syrup, and the crème brûlée topping? Please.”

“So… birthday cake frappuccino with oat milk?” He snickers in your sleepy face before walking off. “You’re gonna have to come with if you want all that extra stuff.”

It’s a latte, not a frappuccino. But you suppose it doesn’t matter if he knows the difference because you’re scurrying to catch up with him as he heads for the elevator.

The “coffee shop you won’t shut up about” has been open for a few months now, and you’ve stopped by at least two times a week since the grand opening for your usual dose of caffeine. Should you be proud or embarrassed that the baristas all know your name and order? How about when they raise their eyebrows at the sight of you walking in with your handsome coworker?

“She’ll have a birthday cake frapp—”

“Don’t listen to him. I’ll get a birthday cake latte, please,” you tell the barista at the register. Jungkook chuckles as you give his arm a light shove. “With oat milk and crème brûlée today.”

“Sure thing, Y/N,” she smiles at you and then turns to the boy next to you. “Anything for you?”

“Just plain coffee, thanks,” he says after a quick glance at the menu. You hate that he orders plain coffee when the menu has all these fun options like pink donut lattes or cookies n cream cappuccinos. If he wanted black coffee, he could’ve saved time and money by brewing some in the office. He didn’t have to go all the way to the coffee shop you wouldn’t shut up about. But he did. And he invited you along for the ride.

As the two of you wait for your drinks, you pick the booth in the corner next to the window. You’ve always had this vision of sitting inside a cozy cafe to work from your laptop or read a book. It just hasn’t happened yet because you get scared off when all the other customers bring their friends or lovers to share that experience with. Your laptop and books can’t compare to that. 

You’ve always been envious. Until today.

“That doesn’t look nearly as complex as it sounded,” Jungkook says when he sees your latte with the fancy crème brûlée on it. He slides his boring coffee across the table to you. “I’ll let you try mine if you let me try yours.”

Only a weirdo would accept a pathetic offer like that.

“Deal.” You take a sip of your sugary treat before passing it off to the boy. He winces from how sweet yours is compared to the bitterness of his black coffee. You make a face for the opposite reason.

“I’m surprised you agreed to it,” he hums with a tiny bit of crème brûlée around his mouth. You want to kiss it off. He must notice you eyeing his lips because he wipes it off with his thumb a second later.

“I wanted you to try my special drink,” you say. It’s for the same reason you lent him your book—to let him know another tiny piece of you without explicitly saying it.

“I’ll have to get it myself next time we come.” He pulls up the notes app on his phone and types as he speaks. You wonder if “next time” and “we” imply that this coffee outing is going to become another routine thing between you and him, just like your walks to the parking lot. Hopefully it does. No, it definitely will. Because you’ll be the one to ask him next time. “What’s it called again? Birthday cake frappuccino… with crème brûlée?”

“Exactly,” you lie. Who knows. His mistake might taste even better. You’ll have to find a way to sneak a taste when he isn’t looking. It’s something sweet to look forward to.

As you sip your latte, the barista who took your order catches your eye from across the store, points at Jungkook, and mouths something to you. You don’t quite catch it, so she repeats it again just as your coworker turns to see what you’re staring at.

“Boyfriend?” she mouths, clear as day, before spinning around to use the espresso machine. 

When the boy turns back to you, he has such a goofy grin on his face. He points to himself and repeats, “Boyfriend?”

“Stop,” you laugh at his antics but totally dodge the question. “Anyway… may I ask why you didn’t go on that date with the recruiting coordinator?” 

His eyes are wide. Probably because it’s not like you to pry. But you just want to make sense of why he’s sitting here with you, acting all sweet and boyfriend-like, after bailing on someone else a few days ago. He’s not his usual self either.

“It was faster to reject her,” he shrugs. You didn’t realize he was in such a hurry on Friday. It certainly didn’t seem like it with how he’d blocked your way out of the conference room.

“What were you in such a hurry for?”

“Isn’t it our unspoken thing to walk to the parking lot together?” He says it like you’re silly. Like the fate of the world depends on him being able to fulfill his duty of walking you to your car each and every day. Like he’d forgo hours of good sex for a five-minute walk with you.

“It’s not unspoken if we talk about it,” you say softly. You’ve always adored the short walks with Jungkook, but maybe you weren’t the only one who felt that way. What kind of guy rejects a date just so he can keep up this year-old tradition between you and him? No guy has ever done anything close to that for you. “But yeah, it is our thing.”

The boy nods with a gentle smile as he sips his coffee. For just a split second, he gives you Jklmnop vibes. You don’t know how else to explain it. He’s a fuck boy, but there’s something so delicate about him that you want to touch without breaking.

You wonder if he’d ever let you in.

On the way out, your favorite friendly barista waves you over to the counter with a huge grin. As much as you love the girl, you’re scared of what might come out of her mouth next. She leans in as if to whisper but ends up shouting over the grinder in the background.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me about him.” Her eyes flick to somewhere beyond your shoulders. “He’s such a hottie, by the way. Y’all are kinda cute together.”

A snort comes from right behind you. “Thank you,” says the hottie. Your hottie, apparently. It would’ve been perfectly fine for him to clarify that the two of you aren’t actually together, but you suppose his ego was too busy soaking in the compliment from the pretty barista.

“Really?” You raise an eyebrow at Jungkook as soon as you’re both out the door.

“What?” What’s with that playful smile of his?

“You didn’t deny what she said.”

“A compliment’s a compliment, Y/N.”

“I didn’t mean the part about you being a hottie.” You shudder at that last word. Yes, Jungkook is the hottest guy you’ve ever seen, but he doesn’t need to hear that from your mouth. “I meant the part about you being my boyfriend.”

“You didn’t deny it earlier, either,” he shrugs. True. “Besides, isn’t that also a compliment?”

Now that he’s mentioned it, it does feel pretty nice to be seen as a couple with someone as attractive as Jungkook—to give the illusion that it’s you who’s got him wrapped around your finger, you who he chose above everyone else, and you who gets to fall asleep in his arms every night. And it feels especially good considering how often other people dismiss you as someone not good enough for him. In fact, this is the first time anyone has ever acknowledged that the two of you go well together.

“Hey man, mind if I steal that fine little lady for a sec?” a sleazy voice calls out in your direction. You don’t bother turning your head to acknowledge the presence of yet another ignorant hooligan on the street, but you do step a little closer to Jungkook. You don’t know what pisses you off more: the fact that this stranger is another nonbeliever that you could be dating a guy like Jungkook or the fact that he asked for another male’s permission to talk to you instead of asking you directly. Most catcallers keep their mouths shut when you’re walking with your handsome coworker, but this one clearly can’t take a hint.

A warm hand pulls you in at the waist. It’s the same soft grip Jungkook held your book with. And you kind of never want him to let go. Because when he holds you close like that, all the shitty people become irrelevant. That doesn’t, however, stop you from getting a kick out of the death stare he gives the catcaller who finally backs off.

“You really showed him,” you tease. His face loosens up after you let out a tiny snicker. Still, he studies your every expression to make sure you’re alright.

“Does that happen to you wherever you go?” he asks as he moves his arm up from your waist to your shoulder, something slightly more appropriate for two friendly colleagues. Suddenly your waist feels cold.

“Usually when I’m out by myself.” Whether it’s the supermarket, the park, the office, you’ve felt objectified pretty much everywhere. Even online. The sad thing about it is that you know you’re not the only one. ”But I’m used to it at this point.”

“Well, men are kind of shitty,” he huffs, looking rather frustrated on your behalf. You’ve never seen him so irritated. For the most part, he knows how to keep a calm composure, even during busy season. It’s oddly satisfying that an inconvenience for you is what brought that emotion out of him.

“I used to think that,” you admit as the two of you enter the office building. “But all it takes is one good guy to outweigh the shitty ones.”

For you, Jungkook has always been that one good guy.

“True. I suppose that hottie boyfriend of yours isn’t that bad, huh.” He gives you a soft shoulder squeeze in the elevator before dropping his arm back to his side. It’s a subtle taste of what he could be doing to other places on your body if he were actually your boyfriend. He’d handle you with so much care.

“You won’t let that go, will you?” you pout, pointing your thumb back in the general direction of the coffee shop. “Those baristas really think we’re dating now, you know.”

He pinches your pouty cheek and leaves you at your desk with a not-so-innocent remark. 

“I wonder why they think that about us.”

The second half of your day feels painfully long. It’s kind of hard to focus on designing wholesome character models when you’ve got Jeon Jungkook stuck in your head. At this rate, your cute little characters are going to turn into bad boys who steal your books and lattes along with your heart. You can’t help it when he’s been extra sweet to you lately. Sweeter than a birthday cake frappuccino could ever be. And just like your favorite sugary beverages, there’s something so addicting about his company.

As you’re finishing up some designs, you spot the boy chatting with his buddies from the other departments. It’s unfair that an entire friend group can be so goodlooking. And it’s even more unfair that Jungkook is still the one you can’t take your eyes off of in the handsome bunch. Great, now you’re even more distracted.

“Hey, I saw you were online again last night,” says the guy from accounting. He has long pretty eyelashes. “Where was my invite?”

“Ah, yeah. Remember that girl on our team the other night?” Jungkook has a cheeky grin. Why does he have such a cheeky grin while talking about some e-girl, and why does your tummy hurt all of a sudden? “She helped me climb out of plat. She’s diamond.”

So what? That’s the same rank as you. Nothing special. Hmph. You hope she gets demoted before the act ends. You’re not a jealous person, but you are petty.

“How do you know she’s a she?” asks the engineer with plump lips.

“That’s what she told me,” Jungkook continues. “And it fits with the fact that she doesn’t use a mic. You guys know how fucked up people can be in that game.”

You nod along to that.

“What’s her username again? I wanna add her now,” the other engineer jumps in. This one has broad shoulders. Very broad.

“You just want to hit on her,” Engineer #1 shakes his head at Engineer #2. You agree with that too.

“Is she single? Or at least around our age?” asks the accountant.

“You guys are monsters,” Jungkook laughs. “I’ll give you her username only if you promise not to simp.”

“Fine,” they all agree reluctantly.

You convince yourself that you’re only eavesdropping because they’re talking too loud, but you’re actually just curious to search up the username and see how this e-girl’s game stats stack up against yours. You’re quite confident your headshot percentage will outrank hers.

“It’s CL, remember?”

“Oh right.”

No, not right. That’s definitely not the username you picked as a subtle nod to your favorite author, and Jungkook is definitely not the lovesick fuck boy you’ve been giving advice to through some wack ass shooter game. Definitely not.

Because if it were true, that would mean Jungkook has a crush on somebody in your office. And who the heck would that be?

“Ready to head out?” Jungkook pops out of nowhere and scares the shit out of you. You nearly leap out of your seat with a tight fist around your tablet pen like you’re about to knife the boy in-game. He holds your book up as a shield. “Whoa there.”

“My bad, I thought you were the enemy.” You snap the pen back onto your tablet and say it with a straight face as if he knows you play the same violent game as him.

He plays along, scanning the office for anyone suspicious. “Who’s the enemy?”

“Marketing?” You only say that because everyone in the office knows the marketing director Kim Namjoon was your college nemesis back when you were even pettier than you are now.

“Ah,” he nods as you pack up and roll your chair in. You’ve always wondered why he just accepts the weird things you do without question. “Glad I’m not your enemy. Wouldn’t want to be stabbed by your tablet pen. Or your nails.”

He points to your pretty manicure. If you didn’t know better, you’d think he’s subtly asking to hold your hand. But you do know better. He has an intense crush on someone else in the building, so there’s really no reason why he’d want to hold your hand.

So instead of misreading the situation and making a fool of yourself by entwining your fingers with his, you poke your favorite of his tattoos (the silly face on his middle finger) with your acrylic. “Consider yourself stabbed.”

You try not to look at the boy’s wrinkly smile. But it’s incredibly hard. Instead, you redirect your eyes anywhere else. Of course they fall on the “it couple” of the office passing by. They don’t do a whole lot of PDA, but the way they look at each other says it all, and they have this glow about them that seems so unobtainable. You feel the envy creeping up again.

On the elevator ride down, you try not to think about the happy couple or Jungkook’s wrinkly smile. It’s making you sad.

“Can I ask you something?” he turns to you. Maybe his question will take your mind off everything bringing your mood down. You nod for him to proceed. “How do you feel about dating a coworker?”

Shitty. You feel shitty. He could probably sense that from your silence upon seeing the couple.

“You mean like Hyuna and Dawn?” You don’t have a problem with it, or with them. If you could pull off a perfect office romance like them, you’d do it too. But it doesn’t seem likely for you, and that’s what sucks.

“Just in general. Like, do you think it’s fine, or is it crossing the line?” he asks. Aha, you get it now. He’s asking for your opinion because he doesn’t want to make you, his totally platonic friend, feel uncomfortable when he starts dating whoever he has a crush on here.

“HR allows it, so I don’t really see a problem with it,” you answer honestly. Sure, you’d be hurt if you had to work in an environment where Jungkook is doing lovey-dovey things with someone else, but you’re not going to be the one to ruin it for him.

“I’ve never seen you date anyone here, though.”

“Well I don’t get asked out all the time like you, Jungkook.”

“What about Mark from accounting? Or my guy Jooheon before he moved overseas? And don’t get me started on Kim Namjoon.” He has his fingers out and ready to list all the other guys in the office who’ve expressed some sort of interest in you, but he decides against it when he sees you glaring back at him. Wise man.

You’d love to know why he’s so familiar with your nonexistent office dating history.

“Okay, I get it. I’ve been asked out a fair amount,” you sigh. “But it doesn’t really count if they aren’t the right person.”

That earns you a soft head tilt from the boy. You swear he’s a puppy. “Oh? Miss Y/N has a type?”

When you think about it, a few of the guys who’ve asked out were your type—smart, funny, hardworking—and yet you still said no. They’ve never hand-delivered meeting notes and chamomile tea when you were out sick, never walked you to your car, never given you something to look forward to at work, and never known your favorite animal. They’ve never made you want them the way you want a certain someone else.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it a type.” It’s a person. The person who makes you feel so safe and cared for. The person who has feelings for another girl. “It’s a little more complicated than that.”

You don’t like being vague, but saying any more than that would only set you up for heartbreak. He can’t hurt you if you stay silent.

As the elevator continues to count down, Jungkook leans against the railing, arms crossed and head down. He’s awfully quiet for someone who always feels the need to say something silly until you laugh.

“What if I told you there’s one more person in the office who’s interested in you?” he asks just before the elevator arrives on the first floor.

The door slides open but neither of you steps out, so it closes back up.

You blink at the boy. First you learn Jungkook has a crush on someone, and now someone suddenly has a crush on you? Your brain genuinely doesn’t know what to do with all this information.

You’d ask who your secret admirer is, but it doesn’t matter. You’d only say yes to one person in this office, and his feelings lie elsewhere. Maybe he’s just trying to set you up with another guy who can walk you to your car. It’s not like the two of you would be able to keep up that tradition once he’s committed to someone else.

You’d rather walk alone at that point.

“A workplace romance sounds cool and all.” You point at the book in Jungkook’s hand while trying to keep a light tone. “But it’s just not for me. You know what I mean?”

He nods with a chuckle as the two of you finally clear out of the elevator. “Based on my history here, it’s probably not for me either.”

You know he’s poking fun at himself, but you hope he doesn’t actually feel that way about himself. He still needs to ask his girl out, and he can’t chicken out now. As the person he’s confided in about his feelings, it’s your job to shower him with encouragement and support. You’ll have to wait until you’re back online, though.

On the way to your car, the office romance conversation has been completely dropped. You ramble on about your sudden craving for tacos, and he claims he makes a “mean taco salad” before sending you a screenshot of the recipe no one asked for. You’ll try it when you get home.

Like always, he leans against your car door as you buckle yourself in. This time, he even tugs on the seatbelt like amusement park workers do before sending you off on a roller coaster. As gentle as he is, it stings where the tips of his fingers graze your shoulder. That feeling lingers even after the door closes.

Jungkook wasn’t lying, you think to yourself as you munch away at his definition of a “mean taco salad.” Your first instinct is to text him about it, but your second one is to silence your phone and cozy up for the night. After your shower, you have another staredown with the pretty lingerie set. At this rate, no one’s going to see you in it, so you might as well wear it and look cute for yourself. 

It’s a little more see-through than you’re normally comfortable with, but the soft silky champagne accents make your body glow. To complete the look, you throw on a short skimpy robe with a baby pink floral pattern. Perhaps you’re being extra for a quiet night in with your cat and a cup of chamomile tea. But it’s what you need right now because you’re desperately searching for something to comfort and distract you from that dang feeling Jungkook left you with. 

It also couldn’t hurt to play a few games without Jklmnop. Maybe you’ll get lucky with the whale shark gun today.

Unfortunately, there’s still no whale shark gun in your shop, but at least Jungkook isn’t online yet. The four games you play without him go really well stat-wise. You’re the team MVP for half those games—something you hadn’t achieved all weekend with Jklmnop on your team. He’s a great friend but the kind of ally who will intentionally blind you so he can make you quake in your boots and steal your kill in the process. He’s lucky he hasn’t let you die while fucking around like that. Still, you can’t remember the last time you had that much fun in your matches.

As you review the summary of game #4, a notification pops up in the top corner of your screen.

[Jklmnop is online!]

“wanna carry me to radiant?” he DMs you right away and sends you an invite.

“no,” you type as you join his party.

“what if i trade you my whale shark gun?”

“fine”

The first thing you do when you spawn into the match is demand the whale shark gun. You put your baseball bat to his head, waiting for him to keep his end of the bargain. The boy drops the gun in front of you and backs away slowly.

“It’s cute that you like that skin so much,” he chuckles into his mic. When you hear his voice, you feel like an idiot for convincing yourself that Jklmnop and Jeon Jungkook weren’t the same person. There’s no mistaking that that’s the calm and flirty voice that has haunted you every day at work for the past year. Does it make you an asshole for wholeheartedly believing your local fuck boy friend wasn’t capable of developing real feelings for someone in the office? Probably, but you intend on redeeming yourself by sending him your full support in the love department. You’re just waiting for him to bring it up.

Twenty kills and one stolen ace later, Jungkook still hasn’t said anything about the mysterious You-know-who—which is weird, considering he wouldn’t shut up all weekend about how she’s “soft like a kitten” but “one that won’t hesitate to bring the claws out.” Who is this girl, and what has she done to Jungkook? He’s become a total cheeseball. And you can’t think of a single person in the office who fits his cheesy description.

“any update on youknowwho about youknowwhat?” you type between rounds.

Jungkook’s character paces back and forth in the snow even after the round begins. The three other members of your team starts following him like ducklings without knowing the context. You watch from afar as they get sniped down one by one until you’re the last one alive.

Usually in 1v5 situations like this, you’re great at keeping your cool and isolating your duels so you aren’t overwhelmed by an ambush. But instead of listening for footsteps and directional cues, you’re listening hard for the boy’s response to your question.

“Clutch this and I’ll give you an update on You-know-who,” he says after you cut the enemy team’s numbers down to one. All you have to do now is plant the bomb and wait for the last person to come out to start defusing. That’s when you’ll swoop in and—

Your character falls face first into the snow. You’ve been knifed from behind, which loses you the round but earns you an evil snicker from Jungkook.

At the start of the next round, you wait once more for the boy to trade his gun with you. But instead, he just stands there, clutching onto the weapon while the rest of the team rushes onto the site to plant the bomb.

“I’ve decided not to ask her out,” he says out of nowhere. “We have this wholesome thing between us, and it’s best if we keep it that way.”

“what makes you say that?” you type before joining up with the others on site. As far as you know, Jungkook isn’t wholesome with any coworker. Except you, maybe. He must have some other strange definition of wholesome.

“Let’s just say I read a whole ass book tonight about a workplace romance and realized I’m not cut out for it.” He really read your book. No. He devoured it. Why does that mean the absolute world to you? “She’s seen me going on date after date, and now I’m pretty sure I’ve scared her away from wanting any part of that.”

He’s not wrong. You used to feel the same way about him, so you understand why he has his reservations. But if that girl knew how much he’d cherish their relationship the way he cherishes your friendship with him, you know she’d fall for him too. There’s no doubt in your mind about that. It’s just a matter of him vocalizing it.

“i still think you should be upfront with her about your feelings,” you type away as you get headshot from who knows where. 

“She can’t hurt me if I stay silent,” Jungkook hums as he runs toward the ticking bomb and crouches in front of it. It looks like he’s trying to defuse the bomb that your own team planted, but it explodes in his face before you have time to correct him.

“gj,” one of your teammates puts in the chat even though everyone watching knows it was not a “good job.” The only silver lining is that he secured the win for your team. You don’t feel like playing anymore, anyway.

Before you log off for the night, you start typing out some long motivational speech along with your top ten reasons as to why Jungkook would make an excellent boyfriend. He’d try new things with you, share some of his favorite things with you, make sure you’re safe, and tease you until the end of time while making you feel so so loved. You know this because it’s what he’s done with you for the past year. But the more you think about it, the more you realize it’s not your place to say all of that from behind a screen with your mic on mute.

You end up deleting your whole spiel and settle for a simple “good night😴” to the boy from your gaming account. Then you get back on your phone.

Y/N🦈 [11:47PM] “It was indeed a mean taco salad”

Y/N🦈 [11:47PM] “Btw did you finish the book?👀”

Jungkook🥴 [11:48PM] “Finished it in 4 hours😌”

Y/N🦈 [11:49PM] “Wanna drop it off to me now?”

Jungkook🥴 [11:49PM] “Now?”

Jungkook🥴 [11:50PM] “Isn’t it past your bedtime?”

Y/N🦈 [11:51PM] “Yes but my cat can’t fall asleep without his bedtime story”

Y/N🦈 [11:51PM] “🥺”

Y/N🦈 [11:51PM] “^^^My cat”

Jungkook🥴 [11:54PM] “omw”

The boy knocks on your door a few minutes later and does a horrible job of keeping his eyes above shoulder level. It doesn’t occur to you that your chest and ass are hanging out of your robe until the chilly air hits those spots.

“All dressed up for your night with Lauren Christina?” he says casually, handing the book back to you in mint condition.

“I thought you said Christina Lauren doesn’t care about my lingerie.” You cross your arms over your chest like it was totally intentional to answer the door in the bare minimum. Jungkook’s sleepwear, on the other hand, looks super cozy. And of fucking course he’s hot as hell in something as simple as sweats and a hoodie. A boy like him doesn’t have to put in any thought or effort to look cute.

“I stand by what I said.” He stares at your exposed skin in an almost lustful manner. Almost. “It’s cold out. You should go crawl back in bed and read your cat his bedtime story. Or do you need me to tuck him in, too?”

“He is quite needy,” you play along. Too bad he’s already fast asleep, all curled up on the couch. You wouldn’t mind if Jungkook tucked you in, though.

“Well tell your needy cat I said goodnight.” He takes a step back toward his car, but you know he must realize you didn’t call him all the way over here just for your cat’s sake.

“Jungkook,” you call out while flipping through the book. Once you find the bookmark wedged in the middle, you extend it to him like a peace offering.

He accepts the bookmark albeit with a puzzled expression. “Is this gratuity for delivering your book at this late hour?”

You shake your head. “It’s gratuity for lending me your whale shark gun all the time.”

“Whale shark gun?” He grips the bookmark by the dorsal fin and holds it like a pistol. It’s aimed at your left breast (or heart) (but breast sounds more accurate).

“The one from the Gentle Giants collection,” you say softly as you rub your arms because holy shit is it cold out. “In Valoranch.”

The wheels in his head start to turn as you pull him inside and toward your “work from home” setup in the living room. Your desk is pretty empty aside from the pastel headset, the cute dolphin Pokémon on your desktop wallpaper, and a cold cup of tea. 

Then he spots the little Valoranch shortcut on the far left corner of your screen. “Wait, you really play Valoranch? What’s your username?”

Instead of telling him, you show him with the help of your book. Your index finger slides across the bookcover from the C in Christina to the L in Lauren.

His eyes widen like a naughty cat caught doing something it shouldn’t be doing.

“Then that means you know about…” He pauses because he dare not repeat his feelings for another coworker in front of you.

You nod. “But I didn’t realize it was you until I overheard you talking about it with the guys earlier today.”

“My voice and backstory didn’t give it away?” 

“It definitely sounded like you.” You plop into your chair and start spinning around so he can’t get a clear view of your face. “But how was I supposed to know you had feelings for someone in our office? I still don’t know who she is, by the way.”

“You don’t?” Your childlike spins are interrupted by a steady hand. From the corner of your eye, you can see the boy’s face transition from doomed to amused. Good. He shouldn’t beat himself up over the bizarre situation.

“Nope.” At least you don’t have a specific face to imagine being next to Jungkook’s on those corny holiday cards that couples and families love to hand out around the office this time of year. “Regardless, you need to stop chickening out and just tell her how you feel already. If she knows you the way I know you, I promise you have nothing to worry about.”

The thing is, you don’t know if anyone else has been on the receiving end of the kinds of things Jungkook does for you. Does he show that side to anyone else but you?

“Fine, you’ve convinced me. I’ll do it.” He sits himself down beside the cat on the couch. “But only if you can figure out who it is.”

You give him a tiny nod for him to drop some hints. Of course you’ll lend an ear and play along if that’s what it takes for him to be more open about his feelings. Besides, you can’t say no when his voice is so soft and fragile like that. 

“She’s on the design team.” Your team is fairly small, so that narrows it down to names and faces you’d actually recognize.

“She has the most complex coffee order I’ve ever seen.” More complex than yours?

“I impulse-bought that whale shark gun because it reminds me of her.” Someone else has good taste in endangered marine life.

“My second job includes walking her to her car after work and pretending to be her hottie boyfriend.” Wait.

“And lastly, in case all of those other hints weren’t obvious enough, she has a needy cat who’s obsessed with Christina Lauren.” He strokes between your needy kitty’s ears and tucks the little guy in under a blanket. What a lucky cat. 

Jungkook only stops with the wholesome shit when you climb into his lap and press your lips into his jawline. On instinct, he slips beneath your robe and grabs you at the waist with those gentle hands of his. He smells of cardamom and cedarwood, like the candle you burn on cold nights when fluffy blankets aren’t enough. And like a moth, you’re attracted to the light and warmth he radiates in the dimness of your home. Even if it means you might get burned.

“Congratulations, you finally got the name right.” You stick your tongue out while your nails comb their way through the locks of hair at the back of his neck. He locks eyes with you, leaning ever so slightly into the massage the way cats do when they need more attention.

And then your lips meet his. You expect the guy who’s locked lips with everyone in the office to get straight to the point and not hold back, but that isn’t the case. What he gives you instead is a soft graze, an affectionate tease. When you try to go in for another taste, he pulls back and lets you chase him. You’d love nothing more than to wipe that smirk off his face with another kiss.

“I thought you said you weren’t down to date a coworker?” Smartass. You wouldn’t be sitting on top of his cock if you weren’t down to be more intimate with him.

“That only applies to everyone except you.” Your robe slides off your shoulder as you poke him in the chest. Funny how you aren’t cold anymore.

“What makes me so special?” he asks while getting a sneak peek of the pretty lingerie you’d secretly hoped he’d see on you.

You think about all the little things he does—he walks with you, reads your book recommendations, takes note of your favorite animals and coffee shops. And he never expects anything in return, including your feelings apparently. He just wants to make sure you feel seen and know he always has your back. When he’s too chicken to be upfront about his feelings, you’ve come to realize this is his love language. 

“You might be open about all the sleeping around you do with other people, but the subtle thoughtful things you do just for me don’t go unnoticed.” You run your fingers along his cheek and bring your lips within striking distance from his. This time, he doesn’t initiate another chase and allows you to press your words into his mouth. “Plus I think it’s really cute that you use the whale shark skin in-game because of me.”

“That’s when I knew I was down bad.” The sound he makes is somewhere between a chuckle and an embarrassed sigh. “I didn’t even know you played that game and yet my mind was still finding ways to connect everything back to you and your little quirks.”

“I knew I was down bad when I installed that game after hearing you raging about it with the boys,” you blurt out of nowhere.

“You did what, Y/N?”

“I started playing that headache of a game because of you, okay? I wholeheartedly believed I was taking that secret to the grave, but now it stays between you and me. Got it?” Your face feels hot, but you aren’t complaining.

“Yes, ma’am.” His teasing grin will never get old, and you love that about him.

In the heat of another kiss, you feel Jungkook tug on the silky sash at your waist. Your robe opens up like curtains being drawn for a grand reveal. Exposed as you are, there’s no need to hide anymore. In fact, you’d be more than down to have sex out in the open on the couch, but you also have to consider the innocent kitten sleeping next to you.

Like the considerate boy he is, Jungkook scoops you up without disturbing the cat and makes his way to your bedroom.

He lays you down on the bed and eyes your body from head to toe. If he wasn’t giving you horny eyes when you greeted him at the door, he definitely is now.

“Am I gonna get you in trouble for keeping you up past your bedtime?” He saves time by tearing his hoodie and t-shirt off in one go. Based on those abs, you suppose working out is another one of his favorite pastimes alongside sex, gaming, and fucking around with you.

“No.” You reach for his body and pull him on top of you. The large bulge tucked away in his sweatpants catches your attention. “But I might be a little sore for tomorrow.”

“Oh? Is that how you like it?” He rubs two fingers against the thin fabric between your legs to test the waters. Your body shudders and tenses up from the tiniest of touches. Given the dry spell you’ve suffered through this year, you know it won’t take much for you to lose it. “Sure you can handle it?”

“Try me.” You push back with your tongue in his mouth and help him out of his sweats. You’re one swipe away from clawing his boxers off, but he grabs ahold of your wrists and pins you against the pillows.

“Someone’s awfully eager,” he says as he leaves a trail of kisses from your neck to your breasts. You squirm under his hot breath, asking for more contact—anywhere on your body will do.

“Yeah, well, we do have another meeting bright and early tomorrow morning, and it’d look bad if we both fell asleep during it because we were up all night having—” Your rambling is interrupted by the boy’s cock staring you down. He tears open a square packet, but you swipe it away and slide it down his length. You don’t mind a bit of rubber if it gives you an excuse to get your paws on him.

In return, he helps you wiggle out of your teeny tiny thong and bra. His hands waste no time in squeezing your breasts and fingering you down below to make sure you’re wet enough. (Spoiler alert: You most definitely are.)

As big as he is, he slides in with relative ease thanks to how desperately you need him inside you. He fills you in perfectly, too, reaffirming the fact that you and him are perfect for one another. Fuck everyone who thinks otherwise.

You dig your long nails into his arms as he moves in and out of you. If he keeps going harder with every thrust, you’re gonna have a difficult time holding on.

“I swear your nails are like cat claws,” he grunts into your ear but makes no actual effort to extract your nails from his arms.

“If I recall correctly, you did refer to me as a soft kitten who isn’t afraid to bring her claws out,” you hum up at him.

“Hey, let’s not talk about all the sappy things I said in-game right now.” There’s a hint of poutiness in his otherwise raspy bedroom voice. As punishment for teasing him, he flips you over onto your knees to give him the best view of your ass. “You weren’t supposed to hear that stuff.”

“Tell me something I’m supposed to hear,” you challenge him as he gives your ass a good squeeze. His fingers dip back between your legs and circle your clit a few times. You body rubs back on instinct like a horny pup against a toy.

“I would like to formally ask you out,” he says with his hands at your hips and his cock back inside you. "Will you go out with me?"

“You're a little late, buddy, but yes, I’ll go out with you,” you chuckle until your orgasm sneaks up on you and hits you like a truck. The moans you let out are probably loud enough to wake the cat, but that just means the two of you will have to relocate the next time you have sex. Perhaps his place or the office breakroom might be worth considering. 

Your arms give out as you tighten around him, so you lower your face to the pillow and let the boy do as he pleases to your body to get his release. After a few more strong thrusts, he gasps your name out in pleasure and pulls out of you. You give him a good ten seconds to catch his breath before you smother him with a million kisses.

You take a glance at the time on your phone. It’s getting awfully late, and you do have that meeting in the morning, but the two of you have a few options:

A) Cuddle in bed and go to sleep like normal 9-5ers.

B) Hop online and play a few games together because your computer’s still on.

C) Go another round and make a special coffee run before the meeting.

None of those options sound like a bad idea when you’ve got Jeon Jungkook to do them with. All he has to do is say the word and you're down.

#bts smut #jungkook smut #bts fanfic #bts scenarios #bts imagines #jungkook fanfic #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #bts fluff #fuck boy jungkook #gamer jungkook #coworker au #office au #jungkook f2l #bts f2l #friends to lovers #mutual pining #jungkook #bts

[cypherthesuccubus]

You can call us both….Daddy~

Alastor x Reader x Luci -Part 1- (NSFW) (MDNI)!!!!!!

WARNINGS: smut, threesome, daddy kink, praise kink, body worship, cock worship, Gentle Dom Luci, Dom Alastor, mate marking, blood kink, slight bondage, S&M, tentacle play, anal, DP, she/ her pronouns, vaginal sex, creampie, facial, slight RadioApple action

Other tags: fluff, angst

Reader will always receive aftercare!!! ✨

Winner by popular vote!!!! Here’s Part 1 of your spicy endeavors with the radio demon and the big boss of hell himself~ I hope you sinners enjoy ~😈✨

(Y/N’s P.O.V)

My eyes open slowly as the Hell’s sun’s rays hit my face through the window pain of my glass doors; leading to my recently built balcony. I sit up to stretch my arms out while letting out a big yawn. Slowly pulling back the covers, I trudge out of bed as I make my way to the bathroom to start my morning routine. I soon then step out the foggy bathroom; already dressed for the day as I finish drying my hair. I make my way my vanity; sitting down as I go through my self care products. As I’m putting on lotion on my arms and legs, I hear some knocking coming from my sliding glass door. I look confused as to who that could be, but then remember the only person who greets me from my balcony was none other than the king himself. He waved at me as he presses his cheek against the glass “You gonna let me in (Y/N)?” I giggle at him as I make my way to the door; sliding it open as he proceeds to step inside. It’s funny how Luci and me got to be really good friends now. The first time we met was just like any other day; going through the motions and joining the group activities on time. It had been 3 months since being a part of the hotel on that day actually. It was that morning Charlie made this announcement saying that her dad was on the way here to see how things were going. It was nerve racking to say the least as I’ve never been in front of the King himself. But when introductions were made and small talk turned into joining the group activity we had planned that day. All the way up to him and me literally having a sleepover in my room; sitting at my vanity together while talking and sharing each other’s products we use. He made me laugh hysterically when I saw him put hair curlers on and he quotes “Whaaat~? They help give my hair its iconic style. Gotta look pretty for the public.” I was rolling when he placed his chin on top of his hands as he interlocked his fingers; batting his eyelashes for effect.

Ever since we would always hang out, thus making him come by the hotel more often. He really is good company. His goofball energy always knew how to cheer me up. We would talk about everything, including some secrets no one else knew. But lately, there’s been a secret that I can’t really bring up around him. I’ve kind of started developing feelings for him, which has became really conflicting. Before we met officially, I would hang around Alastor from time to time when I first became a part of the hotel. He was charismatic and polite when welcoming me to the hotel. We would occasionally sit on his balcony; having a cup of tea as we chatted about how our days went. We even had some very interesting and intellectual discussions on similar interests we shared. He went as far as showing me around his radio tower, which he never does to just anyone. It was even more of a privilege when he invited me to do a podcast with him. He told me that he enjoyed our conversations so much that he wanted to put it on the air. It was a lot of fun doing it too. After our podcast, there was surprisingly a lot of positive feedback. It seemed people really loved our views on things and wanted more. Soon through those 3 months, once a week, we had a podcast together and he called it “Radio Tea Time.” I thought it was clever since we started having these talks over a cup of tea.

Now here’s where the confliction of my developing feelings for Luci comes to play here. Since I’ve been doing these podcasts with Alastor, then just enjoyed in each others company after the show; I’ve also developed feelings for him too. Honestly, I don’t think I’m gonna get anywhere with Alastor to be fair. He never was interested in those sort of things to begin with. My best bet would be to pursue Luci all the way, but this part of me doesn’t want to forget my feelings for Alastor either. “Hey (Y/N), are you doing ok?” Luci snaps me out of my thoughts as I give him a reassuring smile. “Oh yes Luci I’m alright. I was just thinking about what I was gonna do after breakfast today.” He pauses for a moment to think of something. His face then lights up as he has a brilliant idea. “I got it! How about I take you and everyone in the hotel to Lu Lu World!” I look at him baffled by the tremendous offer. Seriously?! Lu Lu World?!?! I’ve never been there before and always wanted to go, but could never afford it. “For real?!?! You would take us to Lu Lu World?!?!” He grins sheepishly at me “Of course dear! I know the owner personally~” I laughed as I lightly punch him in the shoulder “Oh stop it you goofball.” He laughs as he then places his hand on the small of my back; directing me towards my bedroom door “Come on, let’s go tell the others on today’s change of plans.”

(Luci’s P.O.V)

I was pretty excited to show (Y/N) around Lu Lu World, since it her first time being here. Of course I was excited to spend more time with my daughter and all her friends at the park too. But to be honest, I really wanted to see (Y/N’s) eyes light up by all the amazing sights she was gonna see. As soon as we arrived at the entrance, she squealed in excitement like a kid in a candy store. Everyone and I had to chase her down cause she was so excited to ride some rides already. The first ride she wanted to ride first was the roller coaster call “The Second Death.” This ride is very popular to visitors so the line was super long, but luckily I’m the king so everyone and me can cut the line through VIP. The ride never disappoints with all its twists and turns. The ride will always leave your stomach doing loops, thus why so many sinners get sick afterwards. After the coaster, we then proceeded to the mini games that’s spread through out the park. I think (Y/N) enjoyed playing the games more than the rides. I even played a game with her cause she wanted the grand prize, which was a big stuffed yellow duck that wore a cute red bow tie. Of course me being the king I easily won it for her. “We have a winner!!! Here you go sir!!!” I take the duck from the imp behind the counter and hand it to her “For you, sweetheart.” She went all giddy and pulled me in for a tight hug “Thankyouthankyouthankyou!!!!!”

She then lets me go and heads towards the group; showing them what she has. A smile takes over my face as I watch how happy (Y/N) was right now. Seeing her smile is all the serotonin I need to keep going through this eternal life in hell. Since her and I have be really good friends since first meeting her; she’s always brought this glowing aura everywhere she went. She was always helping my daughter around the hotel whenever she can. Even when Charlie insisted that she could do it herself, (Y/N) always persuaded her otherwise to say yes to her help. Sometimes (Y/N’s) kindness would shine just as brightly as Charlie’s. They really were the definition of being the best of friends. “That was really nice of you dad!” I jump and turn to see Charlie standing behind me. “Ah Charlie! I didn’t see you there sweetie.” I straighten my coat and hat while dusting off my sleeves “I’m really glad that you found a friend in (Y/N) just like I do!” She smiles as she gives me a hug as well. “Any friend of yours is a friend of mine sweetie.” She lets go as she leads me back to the group as we continue onto the next ride. Sometimes I wish I was more honest with myself, especially with my daughter. I honestly don’t know how much longer I can keep this secret of mine.

In long story short, the longer I spent time with (Y/N)….the more I started to like her…..like….really like her. What do they call it these days? A crush? Yeah that sounds about right. But we have such a good thing going already; I really don’t want to mess anything up. Ever since Lilith and I separated, I’ve been scared to move on like this; thinking maybe she would come back. But since meeting (Y/N); helping me through some tough times and encouraging me to take care of myself; things have changed tremendously and I’m so afraid to take the next step. What if she doesn’t feel the same? What if this ruins our friendship if I decide to make a move? I don’t know what to do anymore!!!!

(Alastor’s P.O.V)

I honestly never intended to come to this wretched place they have the nerve to call an “Amusement Park” There’s nothing really amusing about it. Just simple lack luster thrills all for a ridiculous price. The only reason why I’m even here is because (Y/N) expressed interest on coming here. It’s fascinating really. We have so many common interests that we have expressed over our podcast; and yet here she is getting excited over something as simple as a theme park. Now that I find amusing. Her excitement is the only reason I’m still here; walking around this place along with a buffoon that calls himself a king. Watching (Y/N) run around; getting easily excited by one thing after another would be more entertaining; If Lucifer wasn’t following her around like a lost puppy. I will never understand how she can be “friends” with him out of all beings of hell. Husker I can understand. Angel is pushing it, but is fine. Even Charlie I can definitely understand, due to how much alike they are naturally. But Lucifer? He doesn’t honestly offer anything except the title, which doesn’t mean shit to begin with. I don’t know why this bothers me so much. These things usually don’t have me even taking a second glance at; let alone look its way. For some unholy reason, I seethe at the sight of Lucifer getting too close to (Y/N).

What is my deal?! I never waste my time on petty thoughts like this!! Why should I care?! Why do I care?!? This is not becoming of me!!! I need to focus on something else other than this. Just pretend that he’s not there. Focus more on (Y/N) and how entertaining she is. I soon then watch her grab the grand prize from Lucifer as she hugged him tightly for it. I grip my staff; almost bending it out of shape as I see Lucifer watch her walk away after the hug; him smiling as he looks at her….differently than usual. What is that look? What does it mean? WHY DO I STILL EVEN CARE?!?! I had a bad feeling this would be a bad idea to come. But something wanted me to, thus pushing all rational thoughts out of the question. That reason other than (Y/N) being amusing; I don’t know what else this feeling is. When I see (Y/N) being….close to Lucifer; I instantly want to kick his teeth in.

Why am I getting so possessive over (Y/N)?! I would never do anything like this for anyone!!! Yet here we are!!! I need to figure out things before I drive myself even more insane than I already am. Soon enough I will get answers to this conundrum, but right now I need to focus on how to keep my demeanor afloat while I’m still here.

#hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer magne #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin smut #hazbin alastor #alastor smut #lucifer smut #alastor x y/n #alastor #alastor x reader #alastor x you #lucifer x reader #lucifer x you #lucifer x y/n #18+ content #18+ post #18+ blog #18+ only #18+ account #alastor x lucifer #radioapple #alastor x reader x lucifer

[giorno-plays-piano]

Office Menace

Pairing: boss!Toji Fushiguro x reader

Warnings: dubcon, power play, unhealthy work dynamics, swearing, smut, attempt at humor.

Words: 1.4k

Summary: Being your boss' favorite employee is no easy task.

_________

Toji Fushiguro is the type of boss everyone hates and loves at the same type.

There wasn't a day he actually showed up on time. All his calls before 11 am end up being sent to his voicemail, regardless of the situation. Emails? He has his secretary sort all of his stuff for him. Reports? Haven't done one himself in a very long while. Overtime? Never for him, of course. He's outta there long before 5 pm. His employees, though? It's better not to ask.

He's such a slacker most people who don't work close with him wonder how he ended up as a vice president, overseeing a department of more than 50 employees. This guy probably spends more time in a gym than in his office.

But his people know why Toji is here, thriving even more than an utter workaholic Nanami Kento. Despite his seeming lack of interest and necessary skills to handle the job, Toji is sharp and observant, and his problem-solving ability is god-tier. Unlike many of you, he never sweats the small stuff. There wasn't a day when he cracked under pressure, even when one of your biggest suppliers suddenly went out of business, leaving you hanging on a thread with a horrifying deficit of goods. Even Geto was on a verge of a mental breakdown that day, but your boss just left the room, made a couple of calls, and returned an hour later with three more factories willing to pull the weight of that bankrupt supplier with less than one month delay. It was a freaking miracle. You still aren't sure how he managed to do it, but it's likely thanks to his impressive network and a sixth sense: Toji Fushiguro can smell smoke long before fire starts. He never comes unprepared.

That's not why his employees love him, though. Regardless of their annoyance at his style of work, they rarely leave because Toji is one of the few bosses who values his resources, and his resources are his people. When the company was going through a severe restructuring, letting go of more than a third of its workers, Toji's department retained the majority of his employees. He fought for them over and over until he wore down higher management and HRs so much they started avoiding him like the plague. To this day, some of your coworkers remind him of his heroic feat when they get drunk enough at the corporate parties.

Besides, while most of you do unpaid overtime, you get rewarded for it with bonuses and other perks like additional vacation days he somehow beats out of management. "We work hard and play hard," says Toji before he goes out for lunch at 12 and disappears from the office for the rest of the day.

He is, surely, a legend.

Jokes aside, you still remember vividly one day when you were supposed to have a significant presentation in front of the heads of departments, including Gojo, Geto, and Kento, and an hour before you discovered a mistake in your calculations because you collected data from the wrong time period. Blood drained from your face when you realized you had an hour to re-do all the formulas that could possibly change the outcome of the whole analysis you had spent weeks working on. If you didn't make it right, your mistake would affect all the crucial decisions made while developing the new collection. You were done.

When Toji found you a couple of minutes later, nearly sobbing and shaking in your seat, he quietly took a chair, sat next to you, and asked you to explain what the problem was. After you told him, biting your lips to shreds, he shrugged, compared the raw data from those two periods, found 4% difference in sales, and asked you to leave the report be. The change was insignificant. It wasn't going to affect the outcome of your analysis, and no one would even see your mistake. They would, however, see your puffy face and think you're unfit to give presentations of this sort if you couldn't handle the pressure.

So Toji just brought you a glass of water, told you to go powder your nose, and left as you stared at his broad back, unblinking, unsure if you wanted to keep crying or fly to him and kiss him all over his handsome face instead.

Least to say, Toji Fushiguro will always be a legend to you, regardless of circumstances.

Or not, given the situation you are in right now, your boss standing right behind your back with his hand not-so-subtly caressing your ass.

You bite down on your lower lip, thinking feverishly if you need to scream - given it's 9 pm and the office is empty - or smack him and run for your life. Both options seem worthless, and, to make it worse, you suck at confronting people. Especially someone as menacing and effortlessly cool as your boss.

While you're stuck in your thoughts, Toji moves his hand to pull your skirt up, and his large hand cups your pussy through your panties as you squeal. His breath warms your ear when you finally manage to utter a single, "S-Sir?"

You can feel him smile against your skin, his lips on your neck. "Sh-h-h. You're safe with me. I won't do anything you don't want."

Respectfully, you are a liar, Sir, you think because you sure as Hell don't want him to stuck his hand between your thighs and do this. Sleeping with your boss, even if he's as handsome as Toji Fushiguro, is a bad fucking idea. But you can't for the life of you get those words out of your mouth, and his fingers are already stroking your clit as you breath out loudly, shivering against his large form.

"Sh-h-h-h," he repeats, making you lean onto him as he moves your panties to the side, his other hand gently caressing your throat. "It's just me. I won't hurt you."

You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to at least make it seem like you find his touch repulsive. Your brain refuses to recognize the fact your boss is actually forcing you to have sex with him. Toji Fushiguro? The man who's paying your salary? The one person who's been anything but respectful to you and your colleagues? It must be a mistake. He'd never do anything like that to you, one of his favorite employees.

He does enjoy having power over you, though, given the satisfaction on his face whenever you call him "Sir" despite how outdated it seems to use this word in a business setting. He wears this strange expression every time you wholeheartedly compliment him on helping his team with something only he can do like he's some sort of your personal hero. You didn't think much of it, but now it seems like...

Oh god, he's so fucking good at fingering you bite back a moan, afraid to make a sound. He's been teasing your swollen clit so much your pussy is drenched, and your knees are trembling. What the fuck? He only just touched you.

"Feels good, huh?" He whispers in your ear as you squirm, desperately clenching the desk in front of you for support. "Wish I could eat you out right here."

"S-sir!"

Apparently, it's the only thing you can say while he fingerfucks you, his long, thick digits working your sex, his other hand lightly squeezing your throat. You grow feverish at his touch, unintentionally rubbing against his crotch as your pussy tightens around his fingers, and Toji exhales into your skin.

He doesn't give you a second to think, pumping his fingers in and out of you as if he wants you to think with you pussy, his hand on your throat squeezing it till you are a bit lightheaded, you hole growing tighter.

Everything else happens like in a dream with you cumming on his fingers before he turns your head to him and forces his tongue inside your mouth. He's magic. You still think it's wrong for him to do it to you, but it feels good, and you are far too intimidated by him to say a word against it when you feel his huge boner pressed against your ass. It feels so fucking good.

But Toji ends it there, carefully pulling your skirt down before he hands you a pack of napkins you keep on your table. When you look at him, bewildered it's ended just like that, he laughs and tells you to be a good girl and meet him tomorrow at 7. He's far from done with you.

_______

Tags: @minshookie29

#toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro #toji x reader #toji smut #jjk toji #jujutsu kaisen #jjk

[nekropsii]

What a about Caliborn makes him so cool in your opinion?

Go keep track of his progression as an artist alongside his development as a character and think about how these are intrinsically linked. Ponder the fact that he is both at his most obnoxious and at his most amateur when trying to ignore his unique style explicitly brought on by his canonical learning disability and mimic others rather than truly be himself. Consider how his explorations of art are genuinely cool, not a bad thing, and how we get some really neat multimedia stuff out of it.

Caliborn may be a shitty little teenage wretch but the way he is portrayed as an artist and as a disabled person is both really good and very real. It comes from a place of love. His learning disability is handled with a degree of gentle care that you would not really expect from Hussie. The place Caliborn's art style ends up in is so fucking sick and I actually unironically love it. The technique he uses is really interesting. It's intentionally reminiscent of an Etch-a-Sketch, and I'm a little obsessed with it.

This is so fucking good. I mean this seriously. He's right - that is some Pure Art Skill.

I just love the way art is employed as a necessary component of his character arc. It's so neat. You don't see visual cues that intricate too often. Usually it's just in character design, but watching his entire art style and even his medium of choice change several times over is fascinating. You can really tell Hussie had a lot of fun with him. He's also just really, really fucking funny. Just about every sentence that comes out of his mouth is Grade A Absolute Fucking Gold, and I'm honestly obsessed with his dynamic with Dirk. This may get me thrown to the wolves, but I personally think Dirk and Caliborn have way more chemistry than Dirk and Jake. Maybe that's because we actually see Dirk and Caliborn interact on screen... Lmao.

Necessary Topic: I don't know why people hate him so much. Like, I understand hating his misogyny and fatphobia, sure, but those are deliberate character points and not just Hussie-isms. I see people act like Caliborn is indicative of Hussie, as if Homestuck-era Hussie wasn't, like, famously really fucking good at writing female characters and absolutely not a misogynist. Caliborn's a parody of Homestuck Anti-Fans - which is a term we really ought to bring back, god, anti-fans are absolutely still a thing and good lord they're everywhere - who really were just shitty little bigoted haters. Calliope, the opposite side of his coin, was representative of, essentially, "the best kind of Homestuck fan" - an ultimately sweet young teen girl who willingly dedicates almost all of her time to this piece of fiction she loves so, so much, who draws a lot of fan art for the joy of it all, has OCs that don't fit any of the design conventions in Homestuck whom she pairs with the characters in it for innocent fun. Someone who has a lot of theories and analyses, writes a lot of fanfic, and is genuinely just having a lot of fun. Everyone loves Calliope. Even the characters in Homestuck love Calliope. They just think she's the cutest, sweetest little thing they ever did see. Caliborn was the worst kind. He sucks on purpose. No one likes him. He is a total nuisance to characters he is by all means trying to impress. I love them both.

It's also just funny that he's a canonical Intersex Transmasc who is probably Gay and this has, like, no relevance to anything about him, really. So no one really talks about it. Gender Hilarious, Gender Nefarious.

#homestuck #homestuck meta #homestuck analysis #cherubs #homestuck cherubs #caliborn #calliope #caliborn.pdf #nekro.pdf #nekro.sms

[dduane]

An anonymized non-anon query

(A note: my ask box isn’t open to anons at the moment, because I started getting inappropriate messages that I didn’t care to see. Maybe I'll eventually go anon-open again. But the present situation isn’t going to stop me from answering asks where the person’s uneasy about having their username revealed. Like this one:)

[text:

Can't go on anon so this is a little mortifying to be Seen™ but;

Do you have any words for fandom girls who are no longer in their 20s and starting to construct people in their heads who shame them for "still being into this stuff"?]

First thing; funny how it's always fandom girls who come up against this, isn't it? If it was some 90-year-old fandom boy in question who'd been painting his face red and white and following Manchester United since he was nine, no one would turn a hair. In fact, everybody in that cohort of interest would be praising him for his commitment and loyalty. It's almost as if some people have bought into the idea that the rules are different for girls somehow! Something to do with the idea that where girls belong is home making everybody a sandwich. I wonder where that might have come from...

Anyway. What you're describing here is something a lot of us have run into: the pressure to (allow me briefly to stand the well-known trope on its head) Be Like All The Other Girls... and to be prepared (and indeed resigned) for that inevitably to happen IRL. This stuff starts sneaking into your head in a very innocuous way: by disguising itself as "being prepared" for what you're afraid might happen. And it's very hard to avoid having that concern slowly but surely turn into a dread of what's going to happen. (For there's a horrible seductiveness about self-fullfilling prophecy... even if you know you've built it yourself. Part of your mind, that frightened advanced-fight-or-flight part that's always trying to keep you safe by predicting all the possible futures, starts feeling satisfied with itself when it finally has the evidence to say, "Well, at least we were prepared for that!")

So it's best to be proactive about managing this, I think, before things start to get bothersome. Develop a quick switchblade-style defense that you can pull out of your brain's back pocket at short notice. And then, when you're used to using it on those rogue ideations, disarm the sneaky "attacker" more thoroughly by taking it apart, gradually, at the more straightforwardly analytical end.

Let's start with the switchblade: a good-old fashioned mantra. How about this:

"Nobody gets to gatekeep my joy."

This can be used as a silent affirmation any time you feel the need. Any time you start feeling that pressure—that annoying whisper from the conjectural voices in your head that want you to think about how maybe you are too old for this kind of thing—pull out the mantra and shiv them in the gut with it, three times. (Threes are always good for this. Think how many spells have to be done, or names spoken, in threes. The rhythm's an archetype all its own.)

What you'll notice, with repetition of this intervention over time, is that the incidence of this kind of thinking gradually gets rarer and rarer. It might take a while to go away completely... but you'll know what to do if it rears its head again.

But also: this response can when necessary be repeated right out loud in front of whatever sorry piece of breathing meat has the unutterable bald-faced gall to actually try to gatekeep you to your (digital or otherwise) face. Pull it out, set your features in an expression of amused calm (because what you do to your face makes differences in your brain), and hit 'em with it. And if they continue to try to argue the point with you, you get to just keep repeating your base-state mantra until they give up and go away.*

...Now, since good mantras normally run deeper than the mere words, it makes sense to inquire into an underlying issue:

Why do people do this to other people? (And I don't mean this as a rhetorical question with optional eyeroll: I mean it as a possible diagnostic.) There has to be a reason people pull this shit... as mandated by the favorite (different) mantra of psychiatric professionals everywhere: "All behavior is motivated."

One aspect of this to consider: the "you're too old to be into this stuff" response is usually a learned behavior. People for whom the perception of "insufficient" age or maturity is an issue have routinely picked it up from others. There are a number of reasons why they parrot it... the likeliest being that simply want to be seen saying the thing that lots of other people they know also say; so that by so doing, they can be seen as Smart. (This is of course just another a manifestation of our old generally-maladaptive friend, the so-called herd instinct.) And nine-tenths of those other people, I can guarantee you, got it in turn from others still. "They're too old for this" is rarely going to be a spontaneous insight. (Except when used pertinent to certain contact sports, and some types of opera.)

Yet why does the trope perpetuate itself so enthusiastically?

Leaving aside personal living-arrangement issues in individual cases, I think it's because in some people, underneath the expressed trope, there's a genuine fear... an insidious variation of the well-known impostor syndrome. And it's this:

They're afraid that whatever it is they've got at the moment, it's may well be the wrong kind of "this stuff"... not a real joy. (Some people will take this to mean, "The kind of stuff, or joy, other people will approve of." Cf. the "seeming Smart" thing.) And, as they get older, they may be becoming afraid they may never have it.

Now, people naturally try to protect themselves from experiencing their own fears whenever possible. This one's no different. So one way such folks find to distract themselves from the fear of having no joy is to devalue such joy in others. That way, whatever they see themselves as having their noses spitefully "rubbed in" can be perceived as no longer a real threat to them. They can start seeing it as a bad joy, a weak or silly or stupid joy. And (in this case specifically) an immature joy.

(With this in mind, the passage in which C.S. Lewis deals with this toxic fetishization of "maturity" is worth quoting in full, since we so frequently see only the last couple/few lines:)

“Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.��

...And you hear there the voice of a man who'd dealt with a whole lot of critics in his time on this subject—some of them quite famous and elevated types, trying to discredit him for what we'd now think of as "clicks"—and had routinely made them ever so sorry they'd engaged. Also, Lewis was an enthusiastic reader of "the pulps" until his dying day, and you should have seen some of his responses to those who tried to tell him that "at his age, he should be over that science fiction stuff by now." I'd have to go digging for the cites, but... hooboy.

Anyway, and as a closer:

You're not required to—at someone else's mere behest—even think about changing your way of thinking and living in the (probably hopeless) hopes of pleasing or placating other people you've never met. And most specifically:

You are in no wise required by the Universe to curtail your personal experience of joy in order to try to make scared and small-souled people more comfortable.Your soul gets to be its own size, and have its own joy... in its very own shape, volume, and richness.

So if anyone pulls the "You're too old for [x]" crap on you, I encourage you to just let that attitude sail on by you and fuck straight out into the Oort Cloud and beyond. Let passing alien spacecraft on their way in-system gaze at it in wonder and say, "Wow, look at that go! Didn't think they had warp drive here yet."

...Anyway: let me know how you get on.

HTH!

*This is a basic assertiveness-training technique that I feel is much undervalued in daily usage. Every time someone comes up with a new reason you should stop doing what they don't like, and expects you to respond to that... what makes them think you're required to come up with a new and different reason not to? Who made that concept up? And why waste useful originality on someone arguing with you in the kind of bad faith that refuses to accept your answers? Just keep repeating yourself with the main reason until they give up (probably in great exasperation: too bad...) and bugger off elsewhere. :) ...But see the useful 1970s work When I Say No, I Feel Guilty for effective DIY approaches to this problem.

#advice #the retired psych nurse is IN -- 5¢ #or indeed #€0.03

[gizkalord]

I've noticed newer media about tcw era anakin and ahsoka is generally more angsty and has touched more upon anakin's tough love teaching style (aka tales of the jedi ep), and this episode in particular portrays... idk, a degree of emotional unavailability on anakin's end? which is kind of fascinating because it's somewhat incongruent with their actual tcw portrayal which tended to put a lighthearted spin on things—i think it's partly because newer content is made knowing that the main fanbase has aged up, partly because the deep ins and outs of their dynamic was never the main focus, and partly because filoni's own opinions have developed over the years.

at the same time, this is also something that i've kind of suspected for a while?? anakin's whole deal is chronically bottling up his extremely strong internal emotions, so i don't think it's unrealistic that he seems distant/closed off and then sublimates those feelings into extremely overprotective actions and harsh training. which then also doubly explains why ahsoka was always so frustrated by that in earlier tcw arcs, because from her perspective, it's like he's wanting her to be super independent but then is also simultaneously overbearing.

i've always felt they've never had a "talking" kind of relationship (see: old friends not forgotten), and all of this fits with that idea. that being said, both the totj ep and the ryloth vision are set earlier in their relationship, which tracks with how i believe things improved with time as they got to know each other better, with ahsoka in particular getting a better grasp on the more unsaid things between them.

anyways, it's all very interesting and i'm glad their relationship is being shown as complex and messy, because it was!! they both cared SO deeply about each other, but their respective inability to properly communicate and open up when it mattered doomed them, especially in the setting of such a high stress/trauma situation.

#i told you all the meta was coming #*snips and skyguy #ahsoka tano #anakin skywalker #ahsoka spoilers #ahsoka show #tcw #star wars #sw meta #WOW i have not used my meta tag in a while

[rowdyhughesy]

Like father like son - Jack Hughes

“ you have chaos in your soul and lightning in your veins. You my dear were made for wild, magical things “

- erin matlock

word count: 1.2K

There's a lot of things you'd like to say in this moment, things you'd like to do as you watch him stand in front of the mirror. Lip tucked between his teeth and nervous features on his face. But you know that what you have to say won't make a difference so you stay silent. Newly painted fingernails twisting and turning the ring on your fingers, a habit you've developed since you got married.

It's not until familiar arms wrap around your shoulders, the hands grabbing yours to stop your anxious fiddling that you get out of your head. "Breath Sweets, I'm starting to think you're more nervous than he is." Jack chuckles pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. Turning your head you lower your voice, scared that you're gonna make your son even more anxious if he hears your conversation.

"I'm just worried he's going to be disappointed." Jack gives you a lazy smile in return. Giving you a quick peck he walks over to your oldest grabbing the tie that lays discarded on the hotel bed.

It warms your heart, watching Jack walk over to Lake,  bumping his shoulder against the teenagers in greeting. How they share small words between each other as he helps him with his tie.

It brings to back to Lakes first picture day in preschool. You’d styled his unruly curls -he got those from Jack- and he had whined about how the dress-shirt was itchy while Jack helped him tie his shoes for a solid 5 minutes.

“What do you think mom?” Lake does a twirl showing you his finished product. Dark green suit making him look more tan than he already is and the brown curls are falling in his eyes. You’d told him to get a haircut but he had been persistent in not ruining his precious flow. Faint freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks.

Blinking away the tears that are forming you stride over, tugging the tall boy close in a hug. “You look so handsome baby.” Is all you can muster up between the sniffles. Lake gives you his signature look when he thinks you’re embarrassing. It often comes out when you’re at his games screaming so loud you can hear it on the other side of the rink.

Jack feeling left out pulls both of you into a group hug. The three of you stay like that for a while, reminiscing back to when it were only the three of you for a solid 5 years. Back in your apartment in Newark, before you bought the house in Hoboken. Before the twins were born.

It was free days with no practice, games, school or work spent playing street hockey and eating breakfast for dinner. It was Lake scoring a goal on Luke for the first time at 5 and a big toothless smile as he jumps in Jacks arms screaming daddy did you see that?

Things weren’t as hectic but it’s all the chaos, road trips and early practices that brought you here and it’s all you could wish for.

This day is all about Lake.

A small knock on the door catches your attention. Giving Jack a look as to say I've got it you wrap your hand around the handle opening it. In the hallway stands your families. The twins Parker and Kaiden come barrelling in like the tornado they usually are as soon as the door opens. A laughing Luke following after along with Quinn who gives you an apologetic smile. "They couldn't wait any longer to see you guys I'm sorry."

“It’s fine Quinn.”

Kaiden seems to have found interest in pestering Lake per usual, babbling in his ear about how he’s better than him at hockey to which Lake only puts him in a headlock. Knuckles ruffling the blonde hair as Kaiden screams for Parker to save him.

Parker isn’t listening to his pleads though because he’s fully concentrated on watching something on Luke’s phone.

The pair of them more best friends than uncle and nephew. Jack believes it has something to do with the fact that both of them are the youngest out of three brothers. You think it’s because Luke is secretly Parker’s hero.

“Kai stop annoying him. Lake don’t give your brother knuckles he’ll go bald if you do that shit” Jack finally breaks Lake and Kaiden apart, having grown tired of their fighting. Kaiden stares at his dad astonished for a second before his head whips around glaring at his older brother.

“I’ll never get any girls if you make me bald asshole!”

“Kaiden language!”

Your knee is bouncing up and down in your seat, hand tightly holding onto Jack’s in a futile attempt to calm your nerves. Lake is biting his lip again but it’s pointless to say anything because he will continue doing it until his name is called.

You know he doesn’t anticipate being picked first overall, his numbers are even better than Jacks were during his draft year but Lake is a realist. Something he got from Jim, he knows he can be number one but there’s other players equally as good so he waits.

The start of the draft before the picks start going off has you even more anxious. Why is it taking so long?

When the spokesperson for the New York Islander steps up on the stage you grab Lake’s hand on instinct. Giving it reassuring squeeze as to say it’s okey. He squeezes right back. One hand running through his hair just as the man in a suit speaks up.

“The New York Islanders are proud to select as first overall from university of Michigan. Lake Hughes.” Before the announcer even has the chance to say the full name you and Jack are up on your feet cheering. Lake stands up with his eyes wide as if he can’t believe what just happened. Like he’s waiting for someone to wake him up.

You whisper how proud you are and how much you love him in your sons ear as he hugs you. Silent tears spilling from your eyes and you don’t even try to hide it because this is all he’s ever wanted and it happened.

Jack brings Lake into the tightest hug you’ve ever seen and that’s saying a lot since he’s always hugging your kids whenever he has the chance.

“I love you Lake. Now go up there and show them what being a Hughes means alright? I’m proud of you buddy.” Jack wipes away his tears when he thinks nobody’s looking but you all see it.

Lake walks down the stairs, shaking peoples hand with a toothy grin as he goes. Handing off his suit jacket when he reaches the stage and shakes more hands before the jersey is given to him.

Turning to Jack you find him already looking at you, glassy eyes and soft smile.

“You did that.” You tell him and he only shakes his head before kissing you.

“No baby, we did that. Together.” And it makes you giddy.

Yeah you did that, you made an awesome kid who loves hockey.

His skill set aren’t thanks to you though because you’re a lousy shot and fall on your ass most of the time when on the ice. The hockey? The hockey is all thanks to Jack.

#jack hughes imagine #jack hughes x reader #nhl imagine #dad!jack hughes imagine

[mouschiwrites]

HEY POOKS! I'm back with a cool idea😋

Basically hcs where the ninja have to train the reader(who is younger then them) because Wu told them too. At first neither of them want to train together and make the training sessions difficult for each other but over time the ninja see themselves in the reader which was apart of wu's plan. So overtime they develop a sibling bond and everyone rubs in their faces on how similar they are even when they used to hate each other.

SILLY REQUEST BUT HOPEFULLY THAT MADE SENSE! ANYWAYS BYE POOKIE REMEMBER TO TAKE RESTS AND DRINK WATER🤍💛🤍👻👻

YIPPEE you’re back with another banger!!!

Me when you call me pookie,, teehee

Ninjago - Unintentionally Becoming the Ninjas’ Little Sibling

Zane

Zane doesn’t always hate kids, but he certainly didn’t like you at first

He saw you as disorganized and disruptive

Your fighting style was no better

He begrudgingly took it upon himself to help shape you up, not just as a fighter, but as a person

Your attitude towards him was not helping his exasperation at all

But he’s perseverant

Eventually you start to come around to his lessons, finding that being organized is pretty convenient at times

You secretly started to organize your room

You absolutely did NOT want him to know that though

One time he walked in on you sorting your comics by franchise, and you legitimately flipped your table

“Y/n! Why did you do that? Look at the mess you’ve made.”

“I-I don’t care about messes!! No… I… I like my room like this…”

He insisted on helping you clean up, at which point he noticed that the comics, which had somehow maintained their separate groups after falling to the floor, were sorted

He doesn’t point it out, but he feels some pride in you

He helps you reorganize the comics wordlessly

Sitting there, just sorting through comics in silence, the tension between you two melted

Once Zane realized that his teachings were getting through to you, he stops being so harsh

He offers to help you organize things, and he’s thrilled if you return the favor

From there he’ll start teaching you to cook and do chores too

That’s when the others start to notice

They call you the Rumba because you’re a little housekeeping helper

Zane finds the name especially comedic because a Rumba is also a robot

Though their teasing makes you all huffy, you wouldn’t go back to your old ways just to stop it

You like the time you spend with Zane too much

Besides doing chores, you guys also like to watch documentaries together

You’re both one of those “did you know (weirdly specific fact)” people

You like to quiz each other on your niche hobbies and interests

You’re both definitely one of those weirdly knowledgeable people that seem to have a fun fact for every scenario

You’ll build off of each others’ fun facts as well

“Did you guys know that monarch butterflies are actually incredibly poisonous?”

“That’s correct. That’s why the viceroy butterfly has evolved to look similar; predators will assume they’re monarchs, and thus elect not to eat them.”

This becomes more annoying for the others as time goes on

Kai

He was determined to “tame” you from the very beginning

When Wu tasked him with training you, he convinced himself that you were a real piece of work

This led to a less than ideal attitude towards you, regardless of whether you were actually a problem child or not

He assumes this air of authority, using his age and experience as excuses to boss you around

That’s where your problem with him arises

And when you start to show how much you hate him, he only feels more justified in his treatment

It’s only when he starts to notice your hot-headedness that he reflects on his treatment of you

He sees himself in you, which makes him question if that’s how he would want to be treated

No, he decides, this is not how he would want to be treated were he in your position

So he approaches you one day when you’re all alone, watching the sunset

“Here to boss me around some more?”

“No, I want to apologize. I shouldn’t be treating you like this. It’s just not helpful, to you or me. I’m going to try to be better.”

His genuineness strikes you

You accept the apology warily

Frankly you’re worried about how he plans to change his treatment of you

You’re pleasantly surprised to find that he’s actually a pretty cool guy once he drops the dictator act

He shows you fun fighting moves, even lets you win every now and again when you spar

And he invites you to do more leisurely activities too

It’s a welcome change from the endless stream of chores he used to give you

He still gives you work to do though (mostly things he doesn’t want to do himself)

Your lingering hot-headedness shines through when this happens

“Why do I have to do it? It’s not fair!”

“Because I said so. Now shoo.”

The others start to tease that you’re just like him

Kai doesn’t mind this at all

If anything, he’s proud to have a mini version of himself

He loves doing stuff with you; your determination makes you a great buddy to be all competitive with

You guys LOVE to compete; video games, chores, training, anything

Cole

You get on Cole’s bad side by being stubborn

Cole’s a pretty chill guy who likes to go with the flow, so if you make him put his foot down, he’s not going to like you

So, when you demonstrate the classic huffiness of a child, he gets pretty impatient

He won’t push hard when it comes to enforcing his authority

He’ll just leave

This makes you feel like he doesn’t care about you, which only exacerbates your bad attitude

It becomes a vicious cycle of hate on both ends

It’s only when you realize that you are being a little bratty that you decide to try and tone it down

This takes him by surprise

“…99, and 100! Okay, all done with warm-ups. What next?”

“Wh— no complaining? Huh. Um, okay, let’s practice your high kicks.”

“You’re the boss.”

He starts to actually enjoy training with you once you’re not arguing all the time

This shows you that he really does care about your progress

The negative cycle therefore becomes a positive one

Cole loves to praise you when you’ve done a good job

He’s very proud of you

When you get used to going with what he says, you’re adopting some of his laid-back attitude

That’s where the others perceive similarities

But they don’t end there

Cole likes to invite you to hang out with him after training, and through your hang out sessions you start to pick up on some of his mannerisms

Like eating the cream out of the Oreo before you eat the cookie

Or leaving the TV on while you take a nap

The teasing gets amped up when the others notice these mirrored habits

Neither of you really care, though

You just like that you have a good relationship now :)

Jay

Jay thought you were a total brat

All it took was one bad experience; he’s volatile like that

He sees you in a bad light once and your reputation is ruined

A bad comment, telling him no once, a dirty look, anything small like that

He’s super cold to you when training, dishing out orders like Gordon Ramsay and glaring at you just as intensely

You feel like you can never satisfy him

As the work he gives you piles up daily, you can’t help but shoot a glare back

Your relationship is fixed in the same way it was ruined: with a single moment

You were watching TV, appreciating a rare break

Your favorite character was on screen, and you couldn’t help but smile and sigh

“Man, I wish you were my friend. Then everything would be okay. You’re just so cool.”

“Isn’t he?!”

You whirled around with wild eyes

Jay was diving to sit down next to you, his eyes sparkling at the screen

He was overjoyed to find out that you liked the show; it was super niche, and none of the other ninjas had even heard of it

You listened as he gushed about the show, a little disturbed by his complete flip of attitude

Eventually you couldn’t help joining his fangirling

You spent literal hours talking

Kai dropped in at one point to make a comment about you two being secret siblings, which you both shrugged off

After that day you were pretty much inseparable

You both proved to be total chatterboxes in each others’ presence

The others find this amusing in the sense that Jay has finally found an equal, but annoying in the sense that you guys literally never stop talking

The only time you shut your mouths is when you’re watching your shows

Even when training, you keep feedback flowing between you

“Nice kick! Try lower next time, though.”

“Thanks! Oof, that hurt…”

Nya

When you start to get frustrated/demotivated with your training, Nya does the same

She finds you “impossible to work with”

So she’ll dump you with someone else, making you feel like garbage to be tossed around

Wu has to remind her that she was the same when she started her ninja training

She’s in denial at first, but when she sees you hunched over in anger, she remembers being in that exact position

With newfound empathy she goes over to you

“Hey… you know, I wasn’t much better when I started my training.”

“I doubt it. I’m just the worst. I’ll never be a ninja.”

She was shocked to find your attitude so similar to her old attitude

From there she had a better idea of how to help you

You were surprised to find her so understanding

You came around to her as you realized she really did know how you were feeling

You put your trust in her, becoming a little more laid-back and letting her guide you

In other words, you adopted her “go with the flow” mindset

Wu was the first to point out your similarities

You both just looked at each other and smiled

You knew you were similar; that’s why you got along

Nya decides to teach you things beyond ninja training, like mechanics

You become quite skilled under her guidance

The others notice that she’s essentially created a smaller version of herself

She protests that you’re your own person, but she can’t deny that you are basically just mini-Nya

Lloyd

Lloyd gets annoyed if you don’t make progress quickly

His training was very fast and intense, so if you can’t keep up, he gets impatient

He’ll just keep pushing harder and harder

He doesn’t realize that not everyone has a prophecy to live up to, and thus probably isn’t motivated in the same way

He can’t find a way to appeal to your motivation, which leaves you feeling like training is just a waste of time

Lloyd finds this attitude incredibly disrespectful

You guys make so many passive aggressive remarks

“Are you already tired?”

“Well, you did kinda just make me, the kid, do 100 push ups.”

It’s when you finally snap that he realizes he’s been doing it wrong

You explode during training one day, storming off while grumbling furiously

Lloyd just stands there, stunned

At that point he finally recognizes that you’re not just a little version of himself, and he needs to get to know you to understand how to help you

So he appeals to you first, remembering the things he used to like as a kid

He gets you into Starfarer, and you guys bond over your love of it

He learns bits and pieces about you when you hang out, and eventually devises a plan to get you back on track

You take to training much better the second time around, making impressive progress

You aren’t cocky about it though; you’ve picked up Lloyd’s humble attitude

The others reminisce about when Lloyd was in your position and they were the trainers

“They’re kinda like you, Lloyd.”

“You think? I guess they are. I remember when you’d train me like this, Kai.”

He takes pride in knowing he’s facilitated your growth

He’s almost as proud to say he’s created another Starfarer fan

You guys still love to gush over the comics together :)

Sorry this was kind of a long read ^^” but thanks for reading! And thank you lovely anon for your request!!

(divider by saradika)

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago x reader #ninjago headcanons #zane julien #ninjago zane #kai smith #kai ninjago #nya smith #nya ninjago #cole brookstone #cole ninjago #jay walker #jay ninjago #lloyd garmadon #lloyd ninjago

[engie-ivy]

(Short fic of Remus being a disaster😋 for @wolfstarmicrofic)

2nd: Rogue

Remus only dates so-called 'bad boys', because he isn't interested in falling in love, but also doesn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, and with those types, he doesn't have to worry about either. When he goes on a date with Sirius Black, however, Remus quickly realizes he's made a huge error of judgment.

Wasn't Looking For This

“You need help,” Mary states as she’s scrolling through Remus’ Tinder matches.

“Don’t you dare start swiping for me!” Remus warns.

Mary shakes her head. “No, I mean like professional help. Have you considered talking to someone?”

“Please.” Remus plucks his phone from her hands. “I don’t see any use in paying a ton of money to have some therapist psychoanalyse how my dating life is problematic.”

“I agree,” Lily says, sprawled out on the couch flipping through a magazine. “You don’t need to be a licensed therapist to psychoanalyse what’s wrong with your dating life. Instability during your childhood that lead to an insecure attachment style, causing you to develop a great fear of commitment, and resulting in you only dating men you know you’ll have no risk of falling in love with. Men I would describe as rogue bad boys. Overconfident, narcissistic, inconsiderate, too full of themselves to care about anybody else’s feelings. Men who definitely aren’t looking for an emotional connection, so you don’t have to worry about not only you getting feelings for them, but also them getting feelings for you.”

Remus glares at her. “Rude.”

Mary sighs. “So, is tonight’s guy a rogue, self-centred bad boy with too much confidence?”

“We actually haven’t spoken much,” Remus admits. “But he definitely has the right vibe. He was wearing a leather jacket in the bar, everyone was throwing themselves at him, but he hardly seemed to care, and he had this haughty air about him. Plus, the reason we didn’t talk much is because he had his tongue in my mouth five minutes after saying hello.” He grins. “So I’m hopeful.”

Lily rolls her eyes. “You’re an absolute disaster.”

Remus gets to his feet and presses a kiss to Lily’s cheek. “Love you too, Lils.” He turns to the girls before going out the door. “Don’t wait up,” he says with a wink.

Lily groans and Mary shakes her head. “You have issues.”

Remus made a huge mistake.

He realizes this immediately as he wakes up in a bed that is most definitely not his. He’s relieved that Sirius isn’t there, which gives him some time to think.

Yesterday, Sirius had taken him out for dinner at a nice restaurant. Afterwards, some drinks and a lovely stroll through the city at night-time and its beautiful city lights, ending at the front door of Sirius’ apartment.

Sirius had been charming and funny, and sure, that happens sometimes. With his habit of dating vain bad boys, Remus isn’t surprised anymore at how charming they can be when they want to. But then Sirius had also been kind and caring and actually interested in what Remus had to say, and that most definitely wasn’t what he signed up for!

Sirius had been a true gentleman, holding out Remus’ chair as they got to their table. He had smiled at Remus with a smile that was so much brighter than Remus remembered from the badly lit bar after a couple of drinks. As soon as they sat down, Sirius had said that his resting face was often interpreted as haughty, and how that ‘so not was who he was’, and that he was glad Remus wanted to give him a chance anyway.

Remus had wanted to scream.

In hindsight, he should’ve fled right there and then. But no, he had stayed. And of course Sirius had offered to share a dessert and then let Remus eat all of it, of course he had insisted that he’d pay for dinner, of course he had asked ‘is the okay?’ when he took Remus’ hand in his as they were walking side by side.

And if that hadn’t been bad enough, it turned out Sirius loves animals. He had shown Remus pictures of his dog, beaming with fondness as he told Remus about her.

The cherry on top of this miserable pie that Remus definitely didn’t order, was that Sirius is a doctor. A bloody doctor. He works in the ER and he loves his job, because ‘it’s just so rewarding’.

When he had gently pulled Remus close and kissed him under a streetlight, Remus’ stomach did this fluttering thing.

It was awful.

Remus gets out of bed and starts putting on his clothes. He’ll shower at home. Right now, he needs to get out of here. He should’ve left yesterday, he shouldn’t have stayed the night. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone home with Sirius in the first place, but he just can’t bring himself to regret that, because holy shite. He’s only human, after all.

He’ll do the awkward goodbye, where Sirius might mutter something about breakfast and maybe having some yoghurt left in the fridge, which Remus will politely decline. He’ll leave and forget all about this. Forget that guys exist who are actually interested in what he has to say, forget that guys exist who look at him like he’s actually worth something, forget that guys exist who can make him feel like he’s actually worth something. Forget that Sirius Black exists.

As he enters the living room, though, he stops in his tracks at the dreadful sight in front of him.

The table is set, and Sirius is in the kitchen, wearing only his boxers and a t-shirt, his hair haphazardly tied in a messy bun, baking what appear to be pancakes. Sirius turns around and smiles at him, and Remus is floored by how he can look even more gorgeous like this then he did yesterday in his dress shirt and suit jacket. His stomach does that weird fluttery thing again, and Remus hopes against his better judgment that it’s due to yesterday’s wine.

“You’re awake, good,” Sirius says. “Since you told me yesterday how you have quite the sweet tooth, I couldn’t let you go without trying Potters’ Perfect Pancakes! Recipe from my chosen mother Effie, and I’m not even overselling when I tell you that they’re the best thing you’ll ever taste. Come, sit!”

Remus’ brain is shouting at him. Run! Get out! Just leave! But Remus’ body moves to the chair, sits down and starts buttering a bloody pancake.

It’s like watching a car speed towards a wall, knowing it’s going to crash, but there being nothing he can do about it.

His feeling of impending doom are interrupted by his first bite of pancake. It’s fluffy, and chewy, and gooey, and smooth, and creamy, and everything in one. “Oh my god,” he says.

Sirius is leaning forward in his chair, looking at Remus with an eager smile, his face brimming with excitement, his eyes sparkling. Remus can’t help but think that he’ll do anything to see Sirius smile like that. “It’s good, innit? I wasn’t exaggerating?”

“Really good,” Remus confirms. “And you definitely weren’t.”

As Remus digs in, Sirius places a mug of tea in front of him. Remus takes a sip, and it’s exactly the way he likes it. A warmth spreads through his body, that has nothing to do with the tea itself.

Then a beautiful girl walks into the kitchen. She has shiny black curls and she’s happily wagging her tail as she barks at Sirius.

“There she is!” Sirius drops to his knees and starts scratching her ears. “You were a little sleepy head, weren’t you? Yes, you were. Yes, you were. Who’s a good girl?” Sirius coos, as his dog starts wagging her tail even more and tries to lick his face.

And that’s just it for Remus.

The car has crashed. There’s nothing for it anymore. He’s done for.

The car has crashed, and all Remus can do now is hope that he’ll make it through in one piece.

Well, at least he has a doctor with him.

#my tumblr writing #wolfstar microfic #wolfstar #wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fic #marauders #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #sirius black #remus lupin #remus x sirius #disaster remus lupin

[sualne]

Sorry if you're already working on this but with Luffy in Croc dad what's his hobby?? Like he's the biggest ball of energy and I think if wasn't fighting wild animals as a kid he would vibrate into another dimension from lack of stimulation. Does he draw and develop his art skills, has he taken up music or is he invested with the void century with Robin? Croc wants to keep him inside and safe so what did he think would be best to entertain him or does he buy a new thing every week that Luffy says he suddenly wants to do. Yes he looks at books but is that it. Also sorry if you answered this before and I've missed waht you said, I am pretty sure I've seen all your comics on this but I haven't seen all your ask answering questions.

i hadn't gotten these questions and im so glad you ask!! :D

so! luffy doesn't have one specific hobby and croc does end up giving him whatever he wants when he suddenly gets a new obsession, one of the reason he's so excited with finding the jewelry box and getting a dagger is because it's finally something new! after that he gets really into rings and knives until it gets bored of it and switch to something else again.

about him and learning about the void century with robin i actually got a comic later for that so i won't say anything here!

im going to make this a list and explain how it goes, under read more:

Fighting: this luffy doesn't know how to fight, but he still love the concept! he gets really excited hearing stories of fights, duels, martial arts and all the rest! In practice though, since he's been so sheltered and only ever saw one real fight that ended up with people being killed in front of him as a kid, if (haha) he were to witness another real fight he wouldn't be as giddy about it as when he hears stories. he does also learn the tiniest bit of kenpo from bonclay!

Dancing: luffy in canon loves dancing (and partying), here too! he doesn't know/master any specific styles but likes to drag people into dancing with him, if no one is around he'll grab some of the smaller bananawani instead.

Singing: he's still very bad at it.

Music: croc noticed how he'd taps on thing and tried to get him to learn some percussion, unfortunately for him, luffy doesn't care about music theory and just does whatever makes him happy. he also love loud noises and croc has to find a way to stop him from making a racket at any hours of the day, it gets worse when luffy loses some of his hearing and needs to make everything even louder. eventually he gets bored of it too.

Cooking: him and croc cooks together pretty often, if no one is there to supervise him luffy will ignore recipes and common sense, making all kind of abominations. it's a miracle he never set the kitchen on fire.

Bugs: he loves them! he collect them! alive. croc is horrified one day when he finds out baby luffy has been letting some food to rot so he could observes flies and larvae going through their little bug lives cycle. later croc gives him those pinned dead bugs collection boxes thinking luffy will like it, he doesnt.

Board&Cards Games: he mostly has to play them by himself, he doesn't like being alone so he'll often ends up playing it "with" the banawanis. after he loses a few too many times against the banawanis and can't get croc to join in for the millionth time he gives up on them. even when robin joins baroques works he still expect her to be too busy to play with him and doesn't ask (she would have accepted if he had asked).

Art&Craft: he tries a bit of everything, doing it his own way meaning most of it is kind of hideous or about to fall apart, canon luffy is completely fine with that, au luffy though, he's having ton of fun at first but when he gets old enough to see that his dad cant quite fake his enthusiasm or interest towards his disastrous creations he gets frustrated and stops for a while. later, robin finds an old drawing of his and thinks its cute so he start doodling a little again for her.

basically, he struggles keeping a hobby, some like fighting, dancing, bugs and staring at pictures in geography books he keeps through his life but mostly, he's very lonely and bored out of his mind, he's depressed, that's not something that can be helped for as long as he's isolated.

when robin becomes a part of his life everything gets better for him! she spends time with him, read stories for him, helps him get out more often, they even meet bonclay and for a few years he's genuinely happy.

#crocau ask #crocodad au #<- this one gets in the main tag cause this is important lore #i probably wont be able to show all of that in comic form so im glad i get to rant about it here!! it also turned out sadder than i expecte

[elliespuns]

Can we talk about how talented the the last of us concept artists are? Not only does it paint a picture for us but it translates to their emotions & personality’s through there facial expressions.

The first bottom picture reads ‘Dina starts to doubt if the bloodshed & distress are worth the outcome as she dresses Ellie’s wounds’.

You can see the embarrassment & pain on Ellie’s face while being taken care of, while Dina concentrating on how to sew up her wounds is doubting if all this revenge is good for Ellie.

‘Ellie feels a deep love for her son, but her trauma threatens the safety of the tiny family. Below the concepts of Ellie carrying the baby while doing routine chores around the farm’

Those one shows the love Ellie truly has for JJ & Dina, but her PTSD & trauma is so bad that she physically nor is mentally stable enough as much as she tries (also LOOK AT JJS LITTLE SHOES!!! So cute!!)

‘The prologue to the game gives us our first & only look at Joel’s daughter, Sarah. Although Sarah is much more innocent, it was important to establish her as a down-to-earth girl who shares many qualities with Ellie. Sarah’s look needed to feel authentic & clearly show her relationship with Joel, while at the same time establishing her as a distinct character with her own sense of style. Her facial features are based on the actress who played & voiced her, Hanna Hayes’

I love that they really made Sarah her own concept art, yes she is important to show the relationship with Joel but then again putting her in a way that she IS her OWN character & not just a side character. & it really shows & connects to how Joel really finds & connects to Ellie seeing the light of Sarah he needed after all those years, something to fight for again, something to look forward to no matter how much Ellie hurt him, because deep down he saw her as a daughter when he denied his own feelings in chapter 1. Ellie knew she wasn’t his daughter, & made it clear in the second game. Showing how much her relationship changed with Joel going from. “I see you as my dad” to “ I am Not your daughter.”

Artists: Hyoung Taek Nam, John Sweeney (pic 1 & 2) , Alex Neonekis, John Sweeney (pic 3), & I can’t find the artist for Sarah’s concept art

Anyway, I’m gonna not go anonymous anymore! But I’ll add my emoji just in case - 🕸️

This is such a beautiful ask. What always got me about the concept art was how fitting it was to the final results of the game. When you think about it, the concept art was created long before the game even started developing. There were just some ideas and concepts (hence the art), but no scrip (at least not the whole thing, maybe like scraps), and yet when we look back at most of these arts, we can see how close they are to the characters we learned to love. This is what I call a precise job. You can see the game was done with love in the heart. 

The scene where Dina is taking care of Ellie is so well done. Be it on the concept art or on the screen, There's so much pain in Ellie in that scene; you wouldn't even have to see that she's all shaken, covered in blood, and crying. All you can do is close your eyes and listen to her voice when she speaks to Dina. Chills.

What I always found very interesting about Sarah, though, was why they chose to make her blond. This makes me even more curious about Joel's ex-wife because, this way, Sarah looks more like Tommy's daughter than Joel's (not suggesting that's true, lol). Looking at the concept art, there are versions of Sarah with darker hair. I wonder why they decided to make her blond all of a sudden. As if it had a reason and they were planning to show us a little of Joel's (blond) ex-wife in Part 3? Hm, who knows?

#the last of us #tlou #ellie williams #ellie tlou #dina nolastname #dina tlou #sarah miller #sarah tlou #joel miller #tommy miller #the last of us part 2 #tlou concept art #elliespuns answers

[simplydnp]

genuinely wondering why phil was considered the "ugly one" out of dan and phil. he's so hot? like there was a time where by some fans phil was literally seen as second best always... has that changed completely? i see more phillies than dannies these days which used to be absolutely the other way round if i remember correctly... like maybe it's just due to the fact that the fans grew up and delevoped some brain cells and/or phil having a glow up. what do you think abt this?

caveat: attraction is subjective and this is not a definitive guide as to what counts as hotness, nor is hotness the epitome of existence or something that people 'need' in order to exist, but instead this serves as an exploration into the culture surrounding perception of appearance as it relates to dan and phil, with care to note that 'conventional' beauty standards are highly correlated with white features and are problematic for many reasons but especially the racist aspect. i do not endorse the 'conventional' standard as the only acceptable one, but it would be remiss to ignore the fact that it plays a role in this conversation, especially in 2010s culture.

this is an interesting question for me because i don't Get all the layers of attraction just in general. so much of it makes very little sense, despite how hard i've tried to understand it. and what i've found out is that it's not supposed to make sense, it's something that just is and. well. my brain doesn't like that 😂 i've 'learned' what 'conventional' beauty standards are and thus can somewhat identify 'objectively' attractive people/qualities, but i'm absolutely just three possums in a trenchcoat on good days 🤣 so my best approximation is as follows:

- phil *pulled* back in the day online

- he stopped playing into it as much and because he wasn't exuding it as much, people stopped seeing it

- combine this with the less traditionally masculine energy he conveyed, alongside moving moreso away from the fully 'emo' look

- i think his fashion sense/choices played into this as well, came across very much like 'guy in tshirt' --which is fine, but unless your features really meet societal beauty standards at the time, it's not 'selling' you in the 'hot' department

- as well, contrasted with dan who had more of the 'societal beauty standard' look, people were less likely to see him in that role, especially because he seemed quite happy not being there (i'd argue some of it was a confidence thing too, especially on a day to day--the outfits video in gamingmas kind of confirmed that for me. he Knew he rocked that plaid suit, cause he did, but i don't think he felt that about his every day attire)

- people love to sort people into boxes and did as much with dnp, especially in making dnp 'opposites' (despite this not actually being true)

- truly think the fringe staying as long as it did didn't help, especially when, self-admittedly, it got a little blocky near the end.

- i think quiff really unlocked something in him. it really suited him, and he felt quite confident about it, as he had every right to. this, combined with a fashion upgrade in him paying a little more attention to it and developing his own personal style, people started to notice. (also dan hyping him up publicly about it made us talk about it more too)

- further style enhancements, more quiff experience led to him experimenting a little more, which let him find things he really liked

- i also think he's learned how to pose better/isnt 'being intentionally awkward' in pictures as much

- his ykw i want a change and idc what you all think attitude in going back to brown, and then into messy--he really Knows he's attractive now and how to dress himself to bring that out (even if he doesnt feel like it all the time)

there has definitely been a shift--i think the fandom has gotten smaller, and a lot of their 'mainstream' audience were dannies back in the heyday bc of the 'societal beauty standards'. so combine many of those people leaving, at a similar timeline to phil figuring his 'look' out, his audience getting older (and the lesbians being Very fond of him), and his consistency in uploading the last few years, i think it all swirls into this current existence where there's a lot of phillies out there and they're loud and proud about it (as they should be), especially cause a lot of them have Always Known but it wasn't the 'popular' take at the time.

i am but a hapless dannie and any phillies who would like to share their two cents/drag me for being wrong pls do so

#i hope this makes sense #there has absolutely been a culture shift and there's a lot of reasons imo why #dnp #c.text #answered

[becauseplot]

Anyway for entirely justifiable reasons (<-is a glutton for angst) I need Chayanne and Tallulah to be present when the hummingbirds come around or a note about the 'wise old crow' appears in their house, causing qPhil to have one of his derealization/reality-questioning episodes. I need it. I need it to happen SO bad. Because they’ve seen Phil get roughed up in a fight, they’ve seen him angry, they’ve seen him wary and even nervous, but they have NEVER seen him doubt like that.

People have already made posts talking about how the cage-for-a-cage/child-of-the-sky stuff has been particularly rough on qPhil, who relies heavily on his constant vigilance, keen senses, and hyper-awareness of his surroundings for reassurance. He's the kind of guy who walks into a room and has already charted at minimum two escape routes by the time he takes a seat, you know? He sees and processes and stores information on everything, at all times, and he uses this to act in the best interest of his and his loved ones' collective survival.

His kids see this side of him too, most significantly in the ways that he looks after them: always keeping an eye on the back of the group, never far from Tallulah, and constantly analyzing Chayanne's fighting style to give helpful critique to optimize his attacks. Chayanne and Tallulah know that everything he's ever done was to protect them. Also, he's always there to offer them advice when they're feeling lost, and even if he doesn't have all the answers they need, he gives enough reassurances and promises to put their minds at ease. Phil is confident in what he knows. In their eyes, he is strong. He is a fortress, safe and impenetrable.

You could say that about a lot of children's perceptions of their parents/guardians/mentors. The older, guiding forces in our lives always seemed strong and infallible to us as kids. That's why it was always unnerving to see them get sick, or get stressed, or cry. Observing weakness in those people felt so, so wrong because we never considered the fact that they were capable of it; it was just impossible.

So, the situation: Phil is suffering in a way that makes him question the very same reality that he was a master of not too long ago. Whenever it happens, he goes quiet, looks around, mutters to himself, breathes shakily, fidgets. He is visibly unnerved and uncertain.

If Chayanne and Tallulah are there, they're gonna notice---they're perceptive, just like him. I'd imagine they'd try to ask him if he's okay, and he'd reassure them that he's fine, and maybe that's enough the first time. But, as more incidents arise, and as time goes on, they start to see more of this out-of-nowhere uneasiness, fear, from him, which is worrying, especially because he won't tell them why.

NOW. Phil has been upfront about a lot of things with Chayanne and Tallulah in the past. For example, during the height of the code attacks, Phil told them everything he ever learned about the codes, every single new development, to ensure that his kids were well informed and prepared. He was frank about the threat on their lives because to sugar-coat anything would be doing them a disservice. It was important they knew all of the cold, hard facts, even if it took away even more of their precious childhood innocence. He values their happiness, but safety comes first. It has always come first.

But this is different. It's not cold hard facts. Phil doesn't know what to believe anymore. When the hummingbirds come around and his reality comes into question, he doesn't know what is real, what he can trust, what is fact. His senses have been compromised. Hell, he's still trying to convince himself that he's not going crazy when all evidence seems to suggest that he's losing his goddamn mind. He doesn't know what to tell his kids, so he tells them nothing.

So now here stands Chayanne and Tallulah. There is something that is scaring their dad, and he won't tell them what is, so on top of the knowledge that their unwavering father is, in fact, capable of true, genuine fear, he's suddenly keeping things from them. Their dad is keeping things from them because he is scared. And I can't imagine a realization more terrifying than that.

#goddamn i did not mean to write an essay i just have SO many thoughts about this #cw derealization mention #look idk if what qphil goes through when he starts questioning the presence of birds/if he's dreaming is like an *actual* dereal. episode #but man if it doesn't make him question his reality and freak him the fuck out #so im calling it 'derealization/reality-questioning' just to cover my bases #yall get what i mean though #dont mind me im just rambling #qsmp philza #qsmp chayanne #qsmp tallulah #actually super nervous to post this longpost so if it vanishes uhhhh you know why

[thirteenashmctrash]

okay so i have gained a new species of spore for my collective brainrot and i have found the perfect selling pitch to drag everyone i care about down with me. if you know the show this is hilarious. if you haven't watched it pay attention:

the show's called leverage. you know how there's those crime serials that aren't good at all but we've all watched a little too much of at least one of them even though they are blatant copaganda which is morally terrible? take your favorite one of those, but remover the copaganda. all the characters are criminals but their only victim is capitalism. every cop in the show is stupid at best and blatantly corrupt to a disgusting level most of the time. there is just as much genuine and intelligent social commentary as this premise demands.

i sense i already have you hooked. i can make this better. stick with me for a minute on this: the character dynamic is a muppet movie but also the Scooby gang

stick with me here!

You have Parker, who fit into the Scooby gang as Scooby and would be played by Gonzo. her crime thing is that she is a cat burglar and she is very good at it. her skill with it is borderline slapstick (hence Scooby) and she is very autistic coded and misunderstood (hence Gonzo)

You've got Eliot, who is the Shaggy and is played by Sam Eagle. He is the brute force of the team and he wants you to think he is all serious and grimdark. but he loves making the employees and victims of their capitalist targets aware of unions and he is a big himbo. i say he is shaggy because he plays Parker's straight man, he has the second most cartoonlike abilities, and he has a passion for cooking

Hardison is Velma as played by Kermit. he is a geeky hacker with a passion for orange soda and he is the heart of the team. he gets overlooked as leader even though he is the driving force of everything they do. like Velma. he also has that trademark Kermit brand of slapstick and deadpanned humor in balance.

Sophie is Daphne as played by miss piggy. she is basically the world's best grifter, she usually the front man interacting with the target the most. she has that crazy streak and the self defense capacity that miss piggy and Daphne (when she's done right) both have. she also has the confidence and style.

Nate is Fred and he is the human character. Fred has "let's split up gang" and Nate has "then we have to steal *fill in the blank with something comedically unfit to finish the sentence*" Fred and Nate are both flat characters with the main trait "i think I'm the leader but my smart friend does all the work" and the main interest of "trapping and screwing over capitalists" he mainly gets to call himself the leader because he's the idea guy and he has an apartment. his role in the muppet analogy is the peak of my pitch if you're still here. because while this is definitely not the Christmas Carol, Nate is the human character because he is Ebenezer Scrooge if instead of being a capitalist, Scrooge was an alcoholic and instead of character growth he was just steadily losing his mind. his moral compass and general intelligence are on a roulette wheel that is spun at random intervals lasting from seconds to the occasional few hours. also he and Sophie have divorced parents of grown children syndrome and the other three are said children. in vibes, of course, they aren't actually related.

if anyone stayed with me through all of that you should seriously watch it. even if i sound like i pulled this all out of my ass. it's so good.

it's an actively anticapitalist, copaganda free crime show where you get to see fun characters beat up every thing bad in society and fuck it all over. it balances fun comedy and wild characters with serious topics and moments in a way that is very natural and genuine. it also has one of my favorite autistic coded characters, a positive and healthy relationship that develops in a way that feels natural to the characters (as well as a rockier one if you're into drama) and it is in the midst of what looks to be an actually well handled revival series with the original cast. i haven't caught up yet but I'm so excited for it. the original had 5 seasons and the revival is waiting to be renewed for season 3.

please go watch leverage. it's so good and it deserves more fans. also i want more fic and that next season

#leverage #please watch leverage #i have only had those blorbos for a few weeks but if anything happens to them i will die #new blorbos #Hardison really is the heart of the group though #you can pry these gay crime dummies from my cold dead hands #parker leverage #alec hardison #eliot spencer #sophie devereaux #nate ford #nathan ford #scooby gang #the muppets #muppets au #scooby doo au #kind of #blorbo #new blorbo who dis