#not to be dramatic but i am so fucking in love with him it destroys me internally

[prettymonegasque]

not acceptable

Charles Leclerc x fem!driver! reader

Summary: Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do when your pretty boyfriend is a lil dumb

Warnings: Excessive cursing, Lando slander, grown men sharing a single brain cell, fluff?

Word Count: 1.3k

Based on my favourite scene in Schitt’s Creek

In all the two years you’ve been in Ferrari, the speculations and rumours of you dating Charles were non-stop. Neither of you paid much attention to it. You were both in happy relationships. However, that changed in the summer of ‘22 when you broke up with your partner. It wasn’t messy and you both agreed it was for the better. You focused on the rest of the season. 

Fast forward to the summer of ‘23, you and Charles were both single. You decided to give in to the speculations and give the relationship a real shot. You went on a few dates, each one being more fun than the previous one. Yet neither of you took the leap to become exclusive. You both liked each other but it wasn’t said out loud as much as you would’ve wanted to. So when Charles invited you to a game night with his friends, you thought it would be the one where he introduced you as his girlfriend. 

You knocked on his apartment door at 7 pm. You had brought a charcuterie board because you panicked and the first thing your mind thought was cheese. 

“Y/N! Come in.” Charles opened the door and hugged you. You tried your best to return while managing the charcuterie board. He laughed at your struggle, took the board from your hand and led you in. You spotted some familiar faces in the room. “Hey, guys. This is Y/N. My teammate as you know.” To risk being dramatic, the only description for what you felt was “death by a thousand cuts”. You still forced a smile and greeted everyone. You took a seat on the sofa next to Charles. “You brought a charcuterie board?” Pierre asked puzzled. “Dibs on gouda.” Yelled a familiar Brit.

**************

For the next few hours, you forced yourself to forget about your “teammate” and focus on the game instead. To everyone’s surprise, you were very good at Monopoly. You had already collected over $7000 worth of assets. You were more than happy to win by default. Arthur suggested Uno and everyone complied. You had never played it before which made the group very happy. 

When you got your cards you leaned over to Charles and whispered “What the fuck should I do now? ” Charles peeked at your cards and by instinct you shied them away from him. “You have to show me the cards so I can tell you what to do.” He laughed. You rolled your eyes and showed him the cards. “How the hell did you get 3 +4 cards?” “Why? Is that bad?” “No no. It is very good and I am very grateful my turn is before you.” “I am gonna crush these motherfuckers” You silently giggled.

“Y/N your turn,” Andrea called out. You placed the +4 card on the table. “Seriously?” Lando sighed and took 4 cards from the deck. “I thought you'd never played this before.” “I haven’t. I’m just that good, Norris.” “You know you could put all the +4 cards at once? ” Charles whispered in your ear. When your turn came again you placed both your +4 cards down. “Oh come on. You’re an absolute ass.” Lando exclaimed. “You just got destroyed by a UNO rookie, Lando” Pierre doubled over in laughter. “Also you have only one card left. You can call out UNO” Arthur nudged you. “UNO!” You yelled. “Well, I guess we have a winner. ” Lorenzo sighed and folded.

You started feeling a little guilty. Your winning spree kept cutting the game short. It didn’t look like anyone was having any fun. Even if Charles isn’t going to introduce you as his girlfriend, you still want his friends and brothers to like you as Charles’ girl. Charles brought in Scrabble as his last resort. He wasn’t expecting to go through 2 games so quickly. You were chosen as the judge. You promised yourself to go easy on everyone. You weren’t sure if you were making a good impression on everyone but boy did your ego love this. 

**************

“What do you mean ‘rizz’ isn’t accepted?” Arthur yelled. “Mate it isn’t in the dictionary.” “Then why does everyone call Lando ‘NoRIZZ’?” “Hey!” “I consider it as an acceptable word. We know the meaning. It exists. It’s a word.” You chimed in. “Thank you!” Arthur smiled and added 13 points to himself. The game continued and you limited yourself to simple words. And you accepted every word regardless of how ridiculous it was. 

“Yes Pierre ‘Fuck’ is a word.” 

“I mean we all know what ‘OMG’ is”

“Sure, Charles. You can make Frenglish words.” 

You could physically feel the pain from the insanity of some words but you were on a mission. You nodded and smiled and carried on. The words became chaotic by the minute. Your last straw was when Lando argued that “Skibidi” should be accepted. 

“That’s it. I can’t take this shit anymore. I respect the game too much to put up with this. You are way too old to use the word ‘Skibidi’, Lando.” “Yeah so wrong, Lando” Pierre fakes disappointment. “You! Fuck is not acceptable.” “Not acceptable. Yes sorry, Y/N” He bites back a laugh. “OMG!? Are you kidding me?” “I wasn’t.” Lorenzo shakes his head. “And my boyfriend sits there looking pretty and wanting to make up Frenglish words. THAT’S NOT EVEN A LANGUAGE. NOT ACCEPTABLE!” 

“I’m sorry. What did you just say?” Charles looked up at you. “I said Lando is old.” You tried to shift the conversation. “Why the fuck am I getting slandered?” “No. I think it was something about your boyfriend being pretty and making up words.” Charles redirects you. “Um... I don’t remember saying that.” You mumbled. “Yeah no. That’s what we heard. Right Arthur?” Pierre snickered. 

“Hey if my girlfriend says Frenglish isn’t acceptable then it isn’t, guys” Charles smirked. “Or it is. I don’t remember saying it.” You shrugged. “So you can do whatever you like.” The ceiling looked much more interesting than the gorgeous green eyes looking at you. “I think our work is done here. Let’s go guys.” Lando stood up. “And what exactly was that work, Norizz?” You called out as everyone was walking out the door chattering. Lando just smiled at you and closed the door. 

You and Charles remained quiet and just looked at each other for a long moment. “I don’t k-” “Do you r-” You both spoke at the same time. Gentle giggles echoed in the silence. “I was gonna ask if you regretted it?” Charles looked at you with a hopeful glint in his eyes. “No. God no. Charles, I don’t regret it at all. But to be honest, I kinda thought you hosted this game night to introduce me as your girlfriend. It sucked ass when you called me your teammate.” You looked down at your feet. You contemplated if sitting down would make this whole shebang less awkward. But Charles quietened your thoughts by standing up and taking your hands in his.

 “Cherie, seconds before you knocked, I was having a full-blown panic attack. I really really like you and I wanted us to be official but I didn’t know what you felt. The guys were there for emotional support because I do not trust myself with any high-risk situation.”

“You drive a car at 300 km/hr almost every weekend.” 

“Please. That is nothing compared to you. Every time I get in the cockpit, I’m more worried about your safety than mine. I was going to introduce you as my girlfriend. Trust me the word was on the tip of my tongue but I was being a pussy and chickened out. I’m so glad you did it tho.” His smile made those adorable dimples pop as he hugged you. “I’m so glad I did it too.” Your voice came out muffled with your cheek pressed against his chest. 

“And I’m so glad you called me pretty.”   

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc fluff #schitt's creek #schittscreekedit #netflix #fanfics #pretty monegasque

[highonmarvel]

Ribs

Bucky Barnes: Mob!Bucky finds you. 18+ only.

additional content warnings here!

CONTENT WARNING, PLEASE READ: This piece includes graphic depictions of domestic violence. Seriously, this is really dark; do not proceed if you are uncomfortable with explicit descriptions of physical and verbal abuse and rape. This is your warning. This is fucking dark. I can not stress this enough. I am fucked up.

Non Con Warning!

What’s scarier than dating Bucky? Leaving him.

You thought with dating the most notorious mob boss in New York, the biggest danger would be his enemies, no: the biggest threat to your safety was him. When you had first met him, you hadn’t known who he was, having only moved to New York a few months prior. He was charming, and he had an air of danger about him you couldn’t help but be attracted to; you thought it would be fun, a New York bad boy, he was all mysterious. You didn’t have any friends at the time, so no one could have warned you about who he really was, and by the time you found out, you were in too deep.

Maybe him being suspiciously rich should have raised a red flag, because even the most pretentious of the wealthy don’t take a limo to a bar, but he had, that first night you met him. The loud chatter had ever so slightly dimmed when he entered the bar, but you only thought it was because he was wearing an expensive suit, and though you rolled your eyes at the flashy display, you couldn’t help but stare at him as he made his way through the room—crowds parted, everyone tried to appear that they hadn’t noticed him, but it was crystal they had. You can’t not notice a man like that.

He disappeared into a back room with two men trailing behind him, and after a few minutes emerged looking slightly disheveled, but satisfied. You tried your hardest to focus on… something else when he sat down beside you and ordered a whiskey, but that was practically impossible when everything about him was magnetic. You chanced a look at him only to find him already staring at you, blue eyes twinkling with a mischievousness you couldn’t quite place and a small smirk. He had taken you home that night.

You hadn’t fled because of his business, selfishly, you could live with the fact he hurt other people—for a while, you could live with the fact he hurt you too, because he just had you captivated. He was harsh, brutal, but could also be loving, he bent over backwards to your every desire—say the word and he’d do it.

Except when you asked him to stop.

You had to leave New York altogether, you knew; he ran the whole fucking city, there was no way you could hide from him in the kingdom he ruled. You had struggled to pick where to go next, if you had had the money, you honestly would have left the fucking continent, started a new life in Namibia or Australia or Japan or however far away from him as you could get, but for now you were restricted to the States. Was Los Angeles too big a city for him to find you, or was it too obvious? Maybe he had people there, you had no idea. Would a small town be too quiet to scream for help, or so obscure he wouldn’t even think to look there?

You settled on a random town in Colorado.

You had ditched your phone the second you could—you had had to hold onto it a bit longer in order to get around, and received many calls and angry texts, but you had tossed it into a street somewhere in Oklahoma and picked up a random brick phone just to have. You thought you were being dramatic at first, taking all these measures, but no, James Barnes is the most powerful man in New York state, more powerful than you could have imagined when you first discovered who he was. He runs everything. He always gets what he wants, and he wants you.

I’ll find you you fucking cunt.

His last text message to you before you had destroyed your phone. You didn’t doubt he could.

You cut your hair, dyed it a shade darker, and spent the first month looking over your shoulder, jumping at shadows, barely speaking to anyone, unsure of who you could trust and who you couldn’t, even from so far away you remained cautious. Picking a job was difficult; if you got an office job, could he find out through fucking white collar records or something? If you got a job in retail, would someone recognise you and alert him?

You got a job at a bookstore—fairly quiet, and the rows of shelves seemed like good enough hiding places were he to hunt you down. Hunt.

In front of the mirror, you pull up your t-shirt to examine your ribs: the bruises are starting to fade, and there’s only a dull pain when you run cold fingers over the light blue. The final reminders of the night you had feared for your life, the night you had decided you had to leave, were starting to fade.

Bucky had gotten violent many times before, but never had you feared for your life; you genuinely thought he was going to kill you.

He had come home fucking livid like you’d never seen before, and three months later you still have no clue as to why. At least when he had been drinking his blows were slightly less hard and you were sometimes (very rarely) able to outrun him and lock yourself in a bathroom for the night, but that night he was drunk purely on anger.

You were genuinely surprised he hadn’t broken your ribs; just hit after hit until you could barely breathe—you thought you’d suffocate. Turns out he had fractured your right foot, but even still you left New York limping badly, knowing if you stopped even to just get it checked out, you’d never make it out the city.

Here, in your new town, you got your foot checked out and fixed up by a friendly doctor, Dean, who you’d taken a liking to. Though it was a bit worse for wear considering you’d left it unchecked for a week, and even now you still couldn’t walk quite right, he assured you you’d make a full recovery.

Dean and you had been growing closer, and you thought he would eventually ask you out, until one day he stopped visiting you at work—usually he’d come in every Wednesday afternoon, but he hadn’t, and you couldn’t reach him online. You even went into his practice, but his assistant had said he’d just taken a camping trip. Your stomach twisted, but you left it, and took he had just gone away for a while.

Deep down, you knew.

The third Wednesday afternoon Dean hasn’t dropped it. You walk back to your place a little down; despite not knowing him well, you were really growing to like him.

You sigh, kicking off your shoes as you enter your apartment and into the pile by the door. You turn on the lights as you make your way through the small place, still limping slightly: corridor, light on; kitchen, light on; living room, light on.

You can’t even say your blood runs ice cold, more like it freezes in your veins.

Bucky is seated comfortably in your armchair, of course nursing a drink, face entirely stoic, and eyes fixated on yours, as if he had been staring at that exact spot for hours, knowing you would fall into his line of vision.

But the door was locked, you want to cry, How did he get in? No windows are broken, nothing.

“Sweetheart,” he coos as he sets his drink on the side table, “I’ve missed you.”

“Why?” is all you can muster, barely a whisper, more like a nearly silent whistle in wind, one you can only hear if you were to really strain for it, and if you knew what to listen for. Why is he here? After three fucking months, you thought (hoped) he’d just lost interest—this can’t be the first time he’s had a girl run away from him considering how he treated you. Why is he so set on this? You can only imagine it’s stubbornness and pride, not wanting to lose a prize, no matter how ill he treated it. And why you?

Of course, though, you can’t articulate any of these thoughts, you can barely even think them, can’t process them, all turning to a light buzz in your in your mind, one that could be mistaken for pure static—just absence of thought. No thoughts, all thoughts, you can’t even care about.

“Of course I missed my favourite girl,” he offers, a lopsided smirk forming on his handsome features, “Sit,” he instructs, so gently you wonder if you’ve imagined it—a very direct order (and you know he doesn’t like to be disobeyed), yet delivered in the softest manner.

The bruises on the right of your ribcage sting as you stare back at him, unmoving. Bucky never repeats himself, and he doesn’t now, seeming to overlook your defiance (though really it’s shock) as he leans forward slightly and begins speaking to you.

“You’re a smart girl, I can tell from how you really tried to cover your traces when you left, huh? You’re a smart girl, so why would you do something so stupid?”

He stands, and you stumble back with a whimper at a harsh misstep on your injured foot.

“And now you’re out here all alone… you need someone to take care of you; look at you, honey,” he gestures to your foot, and if you could get your vocal chords to work, you would scream at him that he did this.

He stalks towards you, and where the sudden adrenaline comes from, you have no idea, but you dart for the front door. He’s on you in a second, slamming your head against the door and watching you slide down. He stands over you a foot on either side of your body and looks down on you, slightly amused.

He’s pure evil.

It occurs to you the front door is locked anyway, you’re caged under him in the narrow corridor, and so you try to crawl through his legs, but he turns and grabs you by your injured foot.

You shriek in pain and desperately try to claw forward, but he tugs you back and twists harshly so you have no choice but to turn over or risk him twisting your fucking foot off.

With more strength than you’ve ever mustered, you swing your left foot up and kick him hard in the crotch. He howls in pain as he drops your foot.

“You fucking bitch!”

You scramble to stand and dart for your bedroom, hoping to climb out the window. He limps after you, and you cry out as he grabs a fistful of hair and tugs you back. You manage to stumble into the bedroom. He grips the doorway and you slam the door after him, hearing a deafening crunch and a yell behind you. You push your back against the door, planting your feet firmly in the ground and trying with all your bodyweight to keep him out, but he easily blows it in, and you fall forward.

You start screaming at him and kicking, but he catches your legs, leaving you to only pathetically wiggle underneath him. He leans down and shouts, “Shut the fuck up!” bringing down a hand you feebly attempt to grasp to stop him, but he slaps you, “You’re a fucking cunt!”

You assume you’re crying, but you can’t feel anything on your cheeks but the sting of his hand.

He drops down to his knees and straddles you easily, despite your struggling against him. He punches you in the face, his rings leaving deep cuts against your cheek. Again, and again, and again, until his knuckles are bloody from the cuts he’s left. You attempt to cough but he brings a fist down and punches your throat. You can barely gasp before he grabs your neck and pulls you up close to his face.

His voice is dangerously low as he drawls, “You’re lucky I have the decency to fuck you on the bed.” He spits in your face and slams your head back down into the floor. He gets off you and, before you can even move, kicks you in the ribs; you can feel the bruises—the healing bruises, they were healing—bloom once again against your skin, against your bones. You roll over before he grabs your left arm, twisting harshly and pulling you across the small room.

You feel your shoulder pop out of place and scream louder than you ever have in your life, an intense white hot pain shooting across your shoulder as it’s dislocated. You can’t even beg him to stop through your sobs and unbearable pain, you can’t breathe, you want to throw up.

This time, you almost wish he does kill you. You wish for him to kill you.

He pulls you up onto the bed, your shoulder blade sliding further across your nerves and sparking pain as intense as the first few seconds all over again. He tosses his suit jacket to the side as you try to sit up. He presses down hard against your injured shoulder, and you choke on your own cry, suffocating more than screaming, at this point.

He punches up from your chin and your head lolls back, your teeth hitting each other harshly, before he uses the opportunity to grasp your throat with one hand, tearing your skirt off with the other.

It’s too painful to struggle other than weakly kicking your legs, which he effortlessly ignores, maybe he doesn’t even feel it.

Mind over matter, Mind over matter, Mind over matter—

You repeat to yourself when you hear him spit in his hand and softly groan as he runs his hand up and down his cock. You don’t even know when he unbuckled his belt.

You close your eyes and try to focus on your breathing; Mind over matter, mind over matter, mind over matt—

He head-buts your forehead, effectively pulling you out of your attempted mental respite. Bucky is scary; he looks down at you with wild eyes, and you hadn’t noticed blood dripping from his temple. You briefly wonder how much blood you’re covered in when he interrupts your thoughts; “Stay with me, bitch.”

“Please stop,” you finally find words rather than shrieks, your voice hoarse and words slurred, like you’ve never spoken before.

He just smiles—smiles—and then thrusts into you, stretching you open, not giving you any time to adjust to his massive length before pounding into you, beyond rough, beyond violent, he’s a fucking mad man, he’s feral. You attempt to grab onto his shoulders and pry him off but your own shoulder hinders you. You weakly punch at him with your right hand, but he doesn’t feel it, and at this point, you’re just exhausted. Throat hoarse, head aching, shoulder burning, foot in pain, and your ribs on fire.

He lets go of your throat and feels around on the bed for his jacket, pulling something out of the inner pockets.

Before you can even process it, he places his other hand over your mouth and presses something cold and metal to your knee. He fires the gun, the bullet flying from the front of your kneecap, shattering the cartilage, and resting in your flesh. He presses down harder on your mouth so your scream is completely guttural.

“Try leave me now,” he pants as she shoots out your other kneecap.

He presses the gun to the right side of your rib cage, digging into the bruises, “Next time you leave me will be in a fucking body bag.”

Ribs (II)

✪

#dark bucky barnes #dark!bucky barnes #dark bucky barnes x reader #dark!bucky x reader #dark!bucky x you #dark!bucky smut #dark!bucky barnes x you #dark!bucky barnes x reader #dark!bucky barnes x y/n #dark!bucky x y/n #dark bucky x reader #dark bucky #dark bucky barnes x you #dark bucky x you #dark bucky smut

[leighsartworks216]

Hellooooo i have a request for Astarion that like

I’m dying to see:

Gn! Druid Tav that had small petty fight with Astarion, Astarion being his stubborn self didn’t apologize ~properly~ or acknowledge he was wrong, tries to pretend the fight didnt happen and chat with Tav, Tav shapeshifts into a cat to avoid talking to him and fights sass with sass and Astarion melts at Tav being adorable😭?

I finished writing this and then was like,, I forgot it's not normal for partners to like scold each other by pinching them and stuff?? My ex used to do shit like that so I just forgot that wasn't normal. So I'm just going to clarify that in this story it's not malicious or anything like that. If it makes you uncomfortable tho I am 100% willing to rewrite it so that's not there at all

Warnings: swearing, scratching

Word Count: 759

Masterlist

AO3

Tag List Form

Astarion sits beside you as though it’s just any other day. He’s got that damn suave smirk on his face - you can just feel it radiating off of him without even needing to see. You try not to visibly bristle and turn your head further away from him. It was best to just wait it out and maybe he’d finally suck up his damn pride long enough to apologize. Maybe.

“So, darling,” he makes sure to really emphasize the word, drawing it out sweetly, “in the interest of keeping myself in peak fighting form, I’m inclined to ask if you would be ever so kind as to let me dine with - or rather - on you tonight.”

You huff a dry laugh. Sharp, short, but lacking genuine amusement. You don’t say anything. Instead, you focus on patching up one of your shirts.

He leans close to you, hovering just over your shoulder. His chest just barely grazes your arm and his breath ghosts across your ear and neck. Was this bastard really trying to seduce you? At a time like this? “Please, dear heart? I’ll be gentle, I promise.”

You glance over your shoulder, to make sure he can see the dead-pan look on your face. “No.” You pull the thread taught. Admittedly, you tug a little more than necessary, bunching up the fabric. Astarion definitely notices. He always does.

“Don’t tell me you’re still upset about earlier?” he chides.

You turn to face your back fully to him, forcing him to move back. You smooth out the bunches of fabric and roughly, messily, continue the next few stitches. He sighs dramatically.

“Come on, love, that was hours ago! All I said was your stitches aren’t even!”

You scoffed and angrily wrinkled your shirt in your lap as you whirled around to face him. “You said my stitches weren’t even and that they were ugly! I have been fixing my clothes my whole life - this is the most efficient stitch to ensure it doesn’t unravel!”

“That doesn’t mean you have to leave a mile between stitches!”

Fuck this. If he doesn’t want to apologize, the least you can do is give him a taste of his own catty fighting style.

One moment, you’re a perfectly humanoid being. The next, you’ve shrunken to less than a foot off the ground. Your back arches, your tail fluffs and sticks straight up, and you bare pointed canines at him as a scratchy hissing comes from your throat. Astarion can hardly feel threatened by a feline.

“Now you’re just being childish,” he scoffs. You jump forward to dig your claws into his leg. “Ow! Hey, that’s not fair!”

He grabs you by your middle and lifts you up. Your claws are removed from his skin, but they continue to pull on his pants.

“You’re going to rip my pants!”

You squirm from his hold, releasing his pants in the process, and land back on the ground. You sit next to your abandoned, half-fixed shirt, back turned to the vampire once more. Your tail flicks side to side in irritation.

Astarion rubs his leg and checks that there’s no lasting damage. There isn’t, of course. Even your claws were mere pinpricks compared to what damage you could do with them, and you’d never willingly destroy his belongings, no matter how pissed at him you were. And even though you are pissed at him, he still can’t help but admire you.

You’re upset, but you’re not physically assaulting him until he apologizes. You pinch him, give him a little scratch - sure. But that pain fades, at most leaving a small mark that fades in a day. You’re so utterly, bafflingly kind to him. Even when he’s being a dick.

He reaches out and scratches just behind your ear. Your ear twitches, but otherwise you show no reaction to his touch. He sighs. “I’m sorry for insulting your handiwork, my dear. You know your work better than anyone, and I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Your tail continues flicking back and forth a moment longer. But then you relent. You turn around and press your cheek into his hand, which he gladly glides along your soft fur. He’d asked once what it felt like to be pet like this. You’d said it was like a massage; like someone was scratching an itch you just couldn’t reach.

You step into his lap and plop right down, rubbing yourself into his abdomen with loud purrs. He chuckles. “Oh you sweet thing,” he coos. “What have I done to deserve you?”

---

Tag List:

@satelliteapotheosis @hypopxia @flsalazar @beverlybeav @angelofthorr @emiemiemiii @marina-and-the-memes @lynnlovesloki @aurasyn @furblrwurblr @cappsikle @mjmygd @thegirlsadventuresinwonderland @mheerdraws @kindadolly @httyd-chocolate @bloopthebat @pandimoostuff @chesb0red @black-star1472 @sessils @olitheghostboy-blog

#request #requested #fanfic #fanfiction #astarion #astarion x tav #astarion x reader #baldur's gate 3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #baldur's gate astarion #baldur's gate tav #baldurs gate tav #baldurs gate astarion #bg3 astarion #bg3 tav #gn reader #x gn reader #gender neutral reader #x gender neutral reader

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

I Love You, Cyar'ika

Dark!Din Djarin x Jedi!Female Reader

Warnings: corruption arc, violent murder but not described in depth, possessive behavior, obsession, loss and anxiety, light smut, manhandling of the reader by Din

Word Count: 4,500

Summary: Din Djarin is a man who lost everything. His home, his son, his Creed. But at the end of the day, he still had you. He still had you, and he was determined to keep you. Sequel to 'Ni Ceta, Cyar'ika'

.

"i am terrified by this dark thing that sleeps in me."

.

It wasn’t until the second half of your first hour trapped that you realized the chain around your ankle wasn’t just metal. It was beskar. The links branched together were long enough to allow you to walk to the neighboring bathroom, but not long enough to reach the door out. The horror of your situation was truly settling into your very soul. Din had locked you away. Din. The man you loved. And the worst part, as if any of this could possibly be worse, was the fact that he only knew you had tried to run away hours ago.

When exactly did he have this chain made?

You spent the rest of your morning trying to rip the chain out of the wall where it was connected to no avail, and when that didn’t work you somehow tried to pull your ankle out of the clasp. It was impossible. The clasp was just tight enough on your skin that you would not be slipping it unless you started considering something much more dramatic, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. You tugged and screamed until your ankle was discolored and your throat was raw.

Then you broke. Quite some time ago, before your extensive Jedi training, you had quite the temper. It took years for you to get a handle on controlling it, but these last few months the frustration and worry had slowly whittled down your very being. So, for the first time in a very long time, you threw a tantrum. You knocked over the nightstand by your bed, hurling every single item you could reach, and destroyed everything that was in your path. 

When you were spent, exhausted from the emotional and physical turmoil, you slumped against the wall panting for breath. Your legs splayed out in front of you so you could glare at the beskar that wrapped around your ankle. You felt so pathetic and vulnerable. It didn’t help that you only wore your undergarments and one of Din’s shirts. It had been what you fell asleep in last night while curled up to the man who chained you to a wall.

The bedroom door opened and Din froze in the doorway. You watched his eyes scan the room in shock before they landed on you. He let out a breath of disbelief, “Cyar’ika.”

“I don’t think I want you to call me that right now.” You said.

Din’s shoulders slumped and he had the audacity to look hurt at your words. As if he hadn’t chained you to a fucking wall. He stepped into the room and shrugged out of his robe⏤ tossing it onto the bed as he neared. Din’s eyes landed on your ankle and his eyes widened. “Me’bana!?” He knelt down to take hold of your ankle, but you tried to pull your legs in to avoid his touch. Din, refusing your refusal, grabbed you by the calf and dragged you toward him.

“Get off!” You barked and kicked out at him. 

Din pinned you to the floor using his weight to keep your hips down and a hand to pin your wrists above your head. The emotion on his face as he stared down at you was not one of anger or even frustration. It was desperate. “Stop. You’re going to hurt yourself. Dank farrik, you already have. Don’t make it worse.”

“You think I care?” You spat your words at him, squirming. “I don’t! I’ll do what I have to if it means⏤”

Din’s other hand snapped up to grab you by the jaw. His fingers pressed into your cheek, not painful but firm, and his face darkened. Anger finally seeped into his features. “I said, stop. I know you’re upset, I know you’re angry with me, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to let you hurt yourself.” You sucked in a sharp breath when he leaned down to rest his forehead against yours. Hand still on your jaw. Din’s eyes closed as he spoke. “You are going to sit still while I take care of you. Understand? This is not up for debate, cyar’ika.”

You didn’t respond. Refused to. Din let out a soft sigh before releasing your jaw and wrists. He sat up and pulled his weight off of you. Slowly, you sat up and chose to just sit there. He pulled his gloves off, tossing them aside in the mess you had already made of the room, and with a tender touch he pulled your leg into his lap. Din’s warm fingers shifted the beskar so he could peer at the skin beneath it. He hissed at the sight of your already forming bruises⏤ the discoloration would be worse tomorrow.

“Cyar’ika⏤”

“I said don’t call me that.”

Din shook his head. “Why would you do this to yourself?”

“Myself?” You scoffed. “You’re the one who put me in chains, Din!”

“To keep you⏤”

“Safe?” You finished for him, but you spat the word bitterly. Din wilted and continued to carefully trace your sore skin. It bothered you that his touch brought you comfort, but that wasn’t something you could just turn off. “When did you have this chain made, Din?” He didn’t reply. “It’s made of beskar. You didn’t just swing out and pick it up. You had it made. When did you⏤”

“Three weeks ago.” Din kept his eyes downcast, glued to your ankle. You took in a sharp breath. It would have been less painful, less shocking, if Din had just reached out and slapped you. Three weeks ago? How long did he have this planned? His warm brown eyes met yours⏤ a gaze you had always been weak to. Your face must have shown your betrayal because Din squeezed your calf softly. “I never planned to use it. I never wanted to use it.”

“But you did.” You mumbled the words out.

Din winced. “I know, cyar’ika. I know. I’m sorry. You will never understand how sorry I am⏤ I will spend the rest of my life trying to remind you. I⏤” He sighed and his thumb traced lazy circles against your skin where it sat. “More than anything though, my love, I need to protect you. I cannot lose you. I wouldn’t survive that.”

“You’re losing me right now, baby.” You shook your head. Tears springing up. “You’re breaking my heart, you’re losing my trust⏤” Din squeezed his eyes shut. Pained and devastated. “How do you think this will end?”

“You will understand. One day.” Din said firmly. He spoke like he was trying to convince himself of this. “Until then, I am just doing what is necessary.” Din rose to find the first aid kit and when he returned you just stared at him. He knelt down once more and wrapped padding around your ankle so the metal wasn’t touching bare skin anymore. When he was satisfied with how it looked, he carefully held your arms and pulled you up to stand. Din cupped your face with his hands, setting a tender kiss on the top of your head before choosing to rest his forehead against yours. “I love you, cyar’ika.”

This wasn’t love, but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him that.

The only times you were unchained from the wall was when you were with Din. He’d take your hand in his and the two of you would wander down the halls or outside of the castle. Always two Mandalorian guards lingering behind you both. You had one arm looped through Din’s. His thick robe draped over your shoulders once more. 

“Bo thinks offering an olive branch would make us seem weak. I’m inclined to agree with her.” Din thought aloud. Most of these walks were him talking to you about his day. You didn’t offer much more than the occasional hum or a snide comment if he pressed too hard. That’s what two weeks of being chained like an animal could do to you. “We have more power than them. It wouldn’t be too difficult to overtake them.”

You hummed. Din glanced down at you and his arm squeezed around yours. There was hope shining in his eyes as if he was eager to hear you offer any sort of commentary. You focused your gaze forward. “The Din I fell in love with wouldn’t jump head first into a war.” His steps stuttered. “He’d try for peace.”

“Cyar’ika.” Din came to a slow stop and turned to face you. His other hand lifted to rest on yours. It trapped your hand against his forearm. “I am the man you fell in love with. That has not changed.” Your eyes darted down to the darksaber hanging from his belt. Din sighed. “This is still about the saber?”

You shook your head. “It always will be. That damned saber has changed you.”

“It hasn’t⏤”

“It has!” You yanked your arm away from his and took a step back. Anger flaring once more. “I keep telling you. It’s poison.” The energy that surrounded it felt suffocating, but it had only gotten worse these last few days. The possession was still there and now it’s tendrils seemed to be trying to seep out into your very soul. As if it could convince you that it had good intentions. “It’s me or the darksaber, Din.” 

He shook his head and you shoved him once in the chest. He barely stumbled back. The Mandalorian guards leapt forward, hands on their weapons in preparation to take out the threat against their King, but Din threw his arm out to stop them. The glare he leveled in their direction was deadly. They both took sheepish steps away. Din focused back on you and the anger in his eyes dissipated back into despair. “You can’t make me choose.” He sighed. “We’ve talked about this. I need the darksaber to keep you safe.”

“We’re just going to argue in circles forever, aren’t we?” You sighed.

Din stepped closer and caressed your face. He leaned in to capture you in a kiss, but you turned at the last second so his lips pressed against your cheek instead. Since the morning you woke up with a beskar anklet, you hadn’t let Din touch you. The first night he slipped into bed behind you, just to sleep, and you had lost your mind. Now, he slept on the small couch that was pushed against the wall in your living space. He pulled back enough that his lips were no longer touching you, but he didn’t stray far.

“I love you, cyar’ika.”

He truly believed it, but obsession⏤ possession⏤ was not love.

At the month mark, you knew things needed to change. Din was too stubborn to concede. He’d keep you chained to that fucking wall forever. So, you started small. You had to play this smart. It began with little things like thanking him when he brought you food or new gifts. Choosing to participate in conversations when the two of you went on walks around the palace. A lingering touch here and there when you were able, and you never shied away from his own touch.

Still, a sudden change in demeanor would give you away. Din, as blinded as he was by the darksaber, was not an idiot. He’d see through your act in seconds, and the fate of his and your life depended on deceiving him. You had to get off this rock. You had to get to help. After thinking about it long and hard, you decided you needed to get to Skywalker. The other Jedi were your best bet. It was just a matter of getting there.

Oddly, your saving grace came in the form of an attack.

Because Din never kept you fully in the loop of the things happening in Mandalore, you weren’t entirely sure what was happening. Being chained to the wall when the explosions started did not help either. For the first fifteen minutes of the disaster all you could do was stand in place, frozen, while straining to listen. Eventually, the explosions stopped, but it was replaced with yelling and thundering footsteps. Not a good sign. As it got closer and closer you searched the room for a weapon or hiding the place. You wouldn’t fit under the bed and even if you hid in the bathroom there would be a chain lying on the floor leading straight to you.

The yelling came right out the door and you didn’t even have time to register the language or tone before the door itself was kicked open. Pirates. That was your best guess. Three men dressed for a fight stepped into your space. Two humans and one Trandoshan. They spoke a language you didn’t recognize, something from the Outer Rims, but even when addressing you they never swapped to Basic. One of the humans took a step closer, smirking, and you shifted to a ready stance. The last time you had felt so ill prepared for a fight was back when you first began your Jedi training. 

Even on a good day, back before Din spiraled into his current state, you were not good at using the Force. Reading energies was your strength, but healing and telekinesis was never your forte. Now? Being as stressed and buried in negative energy as you were, it was nearly non-existent. Every day you spent around the  darksaber you felt further from the Force for some Maker forsaken reason. The Force you recognized, at least.

The Trandoshan began to rummage through the room scavenging, but the two human men were still approaching you. They laughed and motioned to the chain around your ankle as they spoke to one another. Cautiously, you took a few steps back so the chain’s tension wouldn’t accidentally catch you. When the first man lunged you met him halfway with an uppercut into his throat. It was a blur of muscle memory and desperation from then. You weren’t doing well, you were surviving, but when one of the men got their hands on the chain they were able to pull your legs out from under you. 

You roughly landed on your back with a grunt, but the other man was quick to pin you down. You thrashed and screamed trying to get loose, but the other just piled on. Their voices were grating, their laughs sent chills down your spine, and their touch made you nauseous. It all boiled into an uncontrollable rage that slipped from your body with a roar. Suddenly, both men were blown clear across the room. You sat up, breathing hard, and glanced down at your hands. Had you just…? There was no time to puzzle through the power that just flowed from you because the Trandoshan leapt across the room to tackle and pin you back to the floor. 

He didn’t have a firm grip on you, and you were able to flip over on him. The victory was short lived when he threw his elbow back, crushing your nose, and you cried out in pain before falling back. The other two men had risen once more, but all of you froze at the terrible roar that echoed down the hall and filled the room with a suffocating tension. It called out your name. You recognized that voice. 

In that one moment, a feral pleasure gripped your soul and allowed your anger to roam free. You grinned up at the men, teeth bloody from your broken nose, “You’re fucked.”

Din stalked into the room, seconds later, and he was possessed by his own rage. The darksaber glowed in his hands, as bright as a burning flame, and it cast terrifying shadows across his face which was twisted in hatred⏤ in bloodlust. With the first swing of the saber, the men knew they were not going to bode well and they began to plead, but their words fell on deaf ears. You watched as Din tore them to shreds, a force to be reckoned with, and a sick grin flickered across your features before you could reign it back. Din was leaving the men in literal pieces, brutal in his attack and inflicting the most terror and pain he could manage before taking a life, and you felt a bubbling pleasure building in your chest.

It was only when his warpath was finished, when he deactivated the saber, that your smile fell. The tendrils of pleasure that had seeped into your very soul with watching the love of your life murder on your behalf slipped away. You took in a sharp breath. What the fuck was that? Why the fuck had you⏤ Your hands began to tremble followed quickly by the rest of your body.

“Cyar’ika.” Din gasped and crossed through the carnage to pull you off the ground and into his arms. His panicked words all came out in a rush of Mando’a before he was calm enough to ask once more in Basic. “Are you alright? Did they hurt you?” His gloves wiped away the blood as he examined your nose. “Are you⏤”

“I’m fine.” You replied shakily, but you felt far from it. Physically, there was nothing wrong. Not really. Your nose would heal, the bruises you garnered in the fight would fade. But mentally, spiritually, emotionally… Your eyes drifted down to the darksaber on his belt. What was it doing to you? It took a moment to realize Din was still talking. You shook your head. “What?”

“I said that was the last of them. They came for revenge, but most of the damage was external. Only a few small groups got into the palace.” Din’s hands were petting your hair. Between every word of comfort he’d lean forward and press his lips to your face. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Focus. Focus. Back to the plan. Back to your mission.

“No.” You swallowed roughly. “I need the chain off.” Din didn’t respond. He just stared at you with wide eyes filled with the fear of a man who had nearly lost the person he swore to protect. You lifted your hands to cup his face and you shook your head. “I’m not going anywhere. You’re not losing me. I’m not losing you. You were right.” You pushed the words out and the tears that fell from your eyes were painfully real. You cried for how lost you felt. It was like you were stuck in quicksand and the more you struggled the deeper you were pulled to it’s dark depths. “I was so scared. I couldn’t fight back. Din⏤”

Din didn’t hesitate. He knelt down and pulled a key from the pouch in his belt to unclasp the metal around your ankle. Hearing it clatter to the ground, feeling the weight drop off, had you sucking in a breath of shock and relief. Din slowly rose once more and you found yourself lost in his eyes⏤ those pretty brown eyes that made you forget every single worry you had. The warm brown eyes that brought you comfort in your lowest moments. The loving brown eyes that gazed at you in worship. 

“Stay with me.” You mumbled and cupped his face again.

Din turned his head to press a kiss against your hand. “I’m not going anywhere, cyar’ika.”

Your fingers tightened around him and a shuddering sob left your lips. “Do you love me?” Din looked affronted by the question. His mouth fell open, but you cut him off. “Baby, just listen, if you love me you’ll put the saber away for tonight.” His eyebrows furrowed in confusion and a hiccup left your lips. “Please, baby, just tonight. I just want you. I want only you.”

Din took a slow breath and then took a step out from your grasp. Fear struck you at first, but Din simply crossed the room to his locked chest which sat in the corner. Slowly, he unlatched each piece of his armor and set it carefully into the chest. When he was left with only his flight suit, Din grasped the darksaber and held it in his bare hand for a moment. Finally, he set it into the chest and closed it. The cursed item was just tucked away, out of sight, but it still made a difference. The unrecognizable dark energy that had been plaguing you seemed to disperse and a familiar sensation filled your chest. It was the Force you recognized. For the first time in a month, you felt like you could breathe.

He walked back to where you stood and settled a soft and hesitant hand on the side of your face, “I do love you, cyar’ika. I know this has been difficult and you haven’t been happy.” Din looked heartbroken as he stared down at you. “But you are everything to me.”

This may have started as just a plan to ease him into a lull of security, but that had been forgotten as you stared up at him. For this one second you felt like yourself, and Din felt like himself. A swell of love overwhelmed you and you pushed closer to capture his lips with yours. Din sighed into the kiss, but before you could deepen it he pulled back. “Din?”

“We don’t have to do this, cyar’ika.” Din whispered. “You were just attacked, stressed, and⏤ This⏤ This isn’t… I don’t want you to feel pressured.”

“I don’t.” You shook your head and it was the absolute truth. Right now, Din felt like the man you loved. Maybe it was weak of you to cave, weak of you to seek out his comfort, but you missed him. You craved him. “I want you, and as long as you want me⏤”

Din brought his lips back to yours, his hand cupping the back of your neck, as he softly kissed you. Every minute movement filled with adoration. You wrapped your arms around his neck to draw yourself closer to him. Pulling back to catch a breath, he left a trail of kisses up your jaw to your ear. “Cyar’ika, I always want you.” His hands settled on your hips to bring you flush against him. “I always need you.”

Your hands grew frantic wanting nothing more than to feel his skin against yours. Just like in a fight, you didn’t need to think. Loving him was muscle memory. You peeled the upper half of his flight suit off his body and he took gasping breaths as you broke away from his kiss to caress the scarred skin of his torso. Your nails lightly raked over the skin overlying his ribs as you leaned in to press soft kisses against every scar you could find. Din trembled at your touch, a breathless gasp tearing ragged from his lips. 

His own hands lifted to tilt your face up so he could lean down and start a tender kiss. Every slow, languid motion was one born of love rather than lust. There was an innocence to the brushes of skin against skin, and for this one moment nothing existed but you and Din. Not the poisonous darksaber buried in a chest or the corpses of the men that meant you harm. As Din picked you up and pinned you into the bed, his weight pressing into you, all that mattered was Din Djarin.

“I love you, cyar’ika.” Din murmured into the skin of your neck⏤ his face buried there as his hands roamed your body with a familiarity born of routine. “I love you so much, cyar’ika.”

Your heart felt so full, and you wondered if you were the one confused on the extent of what the word love could mean.

Din laughed and you lightly shoved him in the side.

“It’s not funny. Don’t laugh at me.”

“I’m not laughing at you, cyar’ika.” He replied as you grinned. “I’m laughing with you.”

“Yeah, I’m not laughing, you ass.”

He continued to chuckle and you shook your head before looping your arm back through his and leaning against him. Mandalore had been relatively calm since the attack two weeks ago, and you had never felt closer to Din. What had you been so worried about? The two of you were safe and had one another. That was all that mattered at the end of the day. You had misjudged the darksaber’s energy. That possession was just another form of loyalty. It brought you and Din the strength to protect one another. A bond. That’s all it was.

“My Mand’alor.”

Din’s feet paused, bringing you to a stop as well, and you both turned to face a Mandalorian who now knelt before the both of you. The woman held a hand across her chest in pledge. Din didn’t motion for the woman to rise, but hummed for her to continue. 

“Our allies who have settled on Concordia are requesting aid currently. Raiders have been plaguing them the last few weeks, but now they are beginning to edge in on the main settlement.”

“Concordia has the means to defend itself...” Din replied.

You squeezed his arm and he glanced down at you. You shook your head. “Concordia is not Mandalore, they’re just allies that⏤ like you said⏤ have their own resources.” Nonchalantly, you shrugged. “We have to protect our own. Any aid we offer to them is taken from our own walls. Our city should come first, Din.”

Din lifted your hand to plant a kiss on the back of it. “Could not have said it better myself, cyar’ika.” He motioned for the Mandalorian to be on her way before the two of you continued down the hall. Only a few yards later, Din chuckled. “I have a gift for you.”

“Oh, do you?” You asked with a smirk.

He pulled you to a stop once more “Close your eyes.” 

“Really?”

Din raised an eyebrow at you and you playfully rolled your eyes before closing them and holding your hands out. You heard the sound of shuffling as Din moved. A beat later something warm settled in your palms and you sucked in a sharp breath at the overwhelming flood of emotions that bared down on you. Your eyes opened to first see Din’s excited and loving smile, but then your gaze drifted down to the lightsaber in your open hands. 

“I figure it’s about time you’re reunited.” Din chuckled. It had been nearly two months since it had been taken from you. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your temple. Your fingers slowly closed around the hilt you had built with love so long ago, and waves of warmth radiated down your arms and into your chest. “I⏤” A different voice called out and Din sighed in irritation. “One moment.”

Din stepped around you to address whoever had called out for him and you just stared and stared at the lightsaber. Possession and obsession was not love. It was not the same as loyalty and protection. You blinked in shock as the clear thoughts cut through the fog you hadn't even realized you were living in. You had been yourself, but for some reason your priorities had changed starkly. Not for some reason. One reason. That fucking saber.

"Hey." Din returned to your side and you heard panic in his voice. Those dark tendrils from the saber surrounded you, but could not sink in. He set his hand on your face and his thumb caressed your cheek. "You're crying."

"I...I'm happy." You lied. "Thank you, Din."

"Of course." Din replied though he looked hesitant to believe you. He leaned in to press a kiss between your eyes. "I love you, cyar'ika."

You loved him, and you almost lost yourself.

But, not again.

#the mandalorian #din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #female reader #reader insert #dark!din djarin #mando #mando x reader #mando x you #mandalorian fanfic #mandalorian x you #mandalorian x reader

[gideonisms]

top 20 characters in tlt who might agree to officiate my wedding ranked by how likely I am to let them:

20. Ortus. it's not a wedding it's a poetry reading now

19. Ianthe. I don't know how this wedding would go or whether it would end up with a marriage or even with all of the guests still intact. Would be interested to find out

18. Mercymorn. She hates you, the concept of marriage, the idea that someone somewhere might be in love, and ceremonies longer than 5 minutes. She Will let you know.

17. cytherea. She shows up in a gown fancier than yours and faints dramatically halfway through

16. Augustine. It could not be more apparent he doesn't give a fuck and he's judging you

15. Wake. your wedding is an excuse to get all your friends in one room so she can destroy them. That said, the speech is pretty good

14. G1deon. he has some interesting ideas about love but he doesn't mention any of them. He gives a brief clearly rehearsed speech you can tell he's put together from a google search

13. Pash. Her speech is mostly swearing and at one point she gets out her knife to gesture

12. Judith. The vows are perfectly correct. It is the stiffest wedding you have ever attended

11. John. Listen the wedding ITSELF would be fine if a bit casual. it's the reception you don't want him to attend.

10. Gideon. She cannot help putting on the gideon nav show on your big day. She puts her own distinct spin on the traditional vows but you're not repeating any of that

9. Pyrrha. she definitely will throw multiple inappropriate jokes in there and/or say something wildly bleak in a cheerful tone. But the rest is so heartfelt you can't be mad at her

8. Camilla. The speech is three sentences long but somehow we are all crying

7. Magnus. He's going to cry. It's going to be lovely but he will cry

6. Alecto. I don't think she'd do a good job but I think the ceremony would be memorable for years to come

5. Coronabeth. she'll pull out all the stops to make it a special event but she may or may not flirt with everyone involved

4. Harrow. The upside is she's so used to holding ceremonies that she can do it in her sleep. She will say the correct thing at the correct time and the wedding WILL happen, but the overtone of impending doom in her speech might kill the vibes

3. Marta, I think she'd show up looking very professional, give it her best shot, and add a bit of humor at the end

2. Palamedes. His enthusiasm is apparent and he's probably officiated a lot of things, only downside is he may or may not ramble a bit

1. Abigail Pent. Assuming she agrees with the wedding I think she'd do a lovely job but if she thinks we're not good for each other we may be back to square one

#everyone else wouldn't agree to it or is too young or too annoying #i did forget aiglamene. listen it wouldn't be a cheerful wedding. but it would be a wedding #this post inspired by kris & i discussing the benefits and downsides of mercymorn officiating the griddlehark wedding vs pyrrha doing it.

[snootlestheangel]

After the events of Las Almas and everything involving Shepherd gets fixed, Task Force 141 and Shadow Company are forced to spend 8 weeks together (minimum) to repair trust and regain their alliance.

These are some Incorrect Quotes from during the 141's stay. (Moose belongs to @cod-dump )

Graves: All right, Shadows! Welcome to Ceremony Day for Shadow Olympics. Unfortunately, this year we have... guests. The military and government, in their infinite wisdom, have decided we need to repair our alliance with some of Britain's forces. In other words, it's a government ordered get-along-shirt with *long pause* Task Force 141. *loud booing from the Shadows* Graves: Yes, Flash? Flash: I am new here, so why do we hate them? *everyone is now suddenly very awkward* *Woody leans over and whispers the answer to Flash* Flash: Nevermind, sir! *sits back down* Graves: This is gonna be awful

*Ghost is watching something with interest on their third day at Shadow Base* Soap: Watcha lookin' at, Lt? Ghost: *wordlessly points* Soap: You're watchin' one of the Shadows... run laps?? Ghost: Yes. For the last twenty minutes. Soap: Oh god... Ghost: I don't think he plans on stopping anytime soon, either. *Flash runs by and waves dramatically before speeding up* Soap and Ghost: What the fuck?

*Soap has found himself in the motor pool* Soap: Damn, this truck is nice! Truck, appearing behind him: It is, but you aren't, so get the fuck out of my shop. Soap: But I've never seen an American HEMTT before!! Truck, skeptical: You know what kind of truck this is? Soap: Hell yeah! *an hour later* Graves: It seems like everyone's getting along okay, so far. Price, scowling: Sure, we'll go with that. It's not at all like your Shadows are terrorizing my men. Graves: That's a bold accusation- What the fuck? *they both look over to see Truck telling Soap all about the HEMTT and Soap is loving every second* Price: Is that an issue? Graves: Truck doesn't like anyone in his shop... Soap, notices them: PRICE LOOK AT THIS FUCKING TRUCK!! IT GOT COMPLETELY DESTROYED AND TRUCK HERE COMPLETELY REDID IT FROM SCRATCH!! ISN'T THAT SO COOL?! CAN WE GET A TRUCK LIKE THIS?? Price: Absolutely not! Graves, doubled over: The world is ending...

*Another day of Ghost watching Flash run cause he's afraid of the power this kid has* Woody, walking with Moose: I don't think Ghost has any ill intentions here, okay? Moose: You don't know that! Woody: Give me one reason to believe Ghost isn't a good guy. Moose, shaking and pointing: He watches Flash run and I don't know why. *Ghost is standing there with his arms crossed and blatantly watching Flash* Woody: Oh, yeah he does. That's... normal, right? I mean we all watched Flash run like this when he was brand new. Moose: But- *can't form words to convey his concern for Flash's safety* Woody: Tell ya what, I'll get Graves to talk to their captain about getting Ghost to stop. In the meantime, just hang out here and keep an eye on the kid if you're so worried. Moose: Uh, okay... Sure, I'll stay here by myself with The Ghost and be the only thing keeping Flash safe. *Woody shakes his head with a laugh and leaves* *Ghost gets the uncomfortable feeling he's being watched* *looks over to see Moose glaring daggers at him* Ghost, thinking: God that guy really hates me, doesn't he? Maybe I should show I'm actually concerned this kid's gonna drop halfway through his laps... yeah, that'll work, right? Shadows are loyal to each other. Moose, thinking: I'm so fucking scared right now, but if he makes one move towards Flash I'll- I'll kill him! Ghost, calling out to Flash: You need a water break! Flash: Oh shit, you right! *runs over to where Ghost is standing to get his water* Moose, terrified so it comes out harsh: Flash sets a timer on his watch for water breaks. Ghost: Oh, right. Just wanted to make sure he's not overworking himself. Flash, oblivious: 'S okay, Moose! My timer was about to go off anyways! Moose: *grunts* Ghost, thinking again as Moose all but glares at him: Well that backfired... Moose, also thinking: He's gonna fucking kill me, oh god, oh shit, Flash run! Flash, sipping his water and looking between them thinking: What am I witnessing? Is this power play? What even is that?

*Gaz and Soap talking while outside during the sunset* Soap: Have you had a conversation with that kid they call Flash, yet? Gaz: YES! Oh my god, I thought you talked. He's really nice but holy shit can he talk. *they look over upon hearing something in the water* *It's Ness crawling out of the pool in his full wetsuit* *Soap and Gaz scream cause they don't recognize him as a person* Ness: What?! Gaz: You're fucking terrifying! Soap: I wanna go home...

[attractive-nuisance-esq]

Ed’s journey this season is going to perfectly mirror addiction and recovery, and I am so fucking here for it. Watching these first three episodes of S2 was like watching a highly dramatized AU of my own descent into rock bottom (except everyone was dressed wayyyyyy cooler than I ever was), so I have a lot of thoughts, reactions, and insights that I want to share with other fans. I’m sure many of us who have struggled with our mental health connected with Ed in these episodes, but I think addiction is the most appropriate lens through which to view him because addicts (more often than people who struggle with other mental illnesses) so wholly destroy their own lives and utterly devastate those of their loved ones. I want to share - from the perspective of someone who has steered her own ship straight into a storm and woke up alone to face some very hard choices - what is going on with Ed at the start of this season and what I think is coming.

Let me start by saying that Ed isn’t literally addicted to any one thing, despite his heavy use of drugs and alcohol, but his goal is the same as that of all addicts: escape. He does not want to sit with the pain of Stede leaving him on an immediate, surface level; on a deeper, more habitual level, he doesn’t want to sit with the pain of his own self-loathing. Of course the two are related: the former brings the latter to a head. Stede abandoning him dredges up and brightly illuminates all of his insecurities, and now Ed has to run. Get out. Escape. Don’t think about it. So he is fighting, stealing, drinking, snorting, shooting, killing - whatever it takes to not think about it.

“Demon? I’m the fuckin’ devil.” People in recovery often talk about addiction as if it were a separate, sentient monster living within them. Ed taking on the mantle of demon - a creature known specifically for possession, for removing the host’s free will - is intentional. So is his insistence that he’s not just any demon but the demon. The worst there is. (More on that when we get to The Innkeeper.)

Izzy’s confrontation of Ed in the captain’s cabin and then on deck is a form of intervention. Izzy is trying to help Ed, but of course this goes terribly for him and for Ed because interventions (I cannot stress this enough) are maybe the worst thing you could do to an addict. All addicts know things are bad, but they cannot be pushed to change one single second before they’re ready. Ed knows things are bad. He’s well-aware of how he’s spending his time, how his crew feels about him, how disappointed Izzy is. Being confronted with all of those truths by Izzy was always only going to make him do two things: 1) dig further into his unhealthy coping mechanisms, never mind that they don’t have nearly the effect that they used to; and 2) lash out at the person who forced him to think about it. Izzy lost his leg the moment he stepped into Ed’s cabin.

The impossible bird. You guys remember the song Chandelier by Sia? The one about her addiction to alcohol? The whole thing may as well come right out of Ed’s mouth at the end of that first episode, because that experience is exactly what he’s trying to convey to Frenchie. Nevermind that Frenchie has the temerity to tell him the bird can’t exist, that it has to come down sometime, that flying forever isn’t sustainable. The bird can come down on its own terms, or crash… but Frenchie’s definitely not going to say that much. Still, “that sounds like something that can’t exist” hits Ed, and leads us to the next episode.

Now we’ve got Ed forlorn, heartbroken, almost catatonic while playing with his cake toppers. We don’t actually see him crying in the opening of the episode, which is the point. He’s done crying now. The impossible bird can’t exist, and Ed has already resigned himself to this. He’s decided to die. The only sure-fire permanent way to not think about it.

When next we see Ed, he seems to be doing better, but this is a huge red flag for anyone who knows to look. He’s giving away his responsibility to Frenchie; he’s cleaning the cabin for the closure. He knows the end is coming fast, and the relief that knowledge brings him leaves him weirdly at peace. It is he eeriest part of these episodes, IMO.

Then he goes to find his first mate, the person who knows him better than anyone else in the world, the man he just fucking shot and ordered killed. Ed needs his low opinion of himself validated, and of course he thinks he’ll get it from Izzy after everything he’s done to him. He wants the one person who has stuck with him through everything to confirm that he’s now irretrievably broken and no longer worthy of his love. Ed wants someone to tell him that he’s right: he should die.

He doesn’t get that from Izzy. Interestingly, Izzy doesn’t tell him he should die. He says “Clean up your own mess.” Izzy has learned the lesson now that Ed isn’t ready to get better and that he can’t make him be ready. (This post isn’t about Izzy, but hoo boy - I have big feels about that man.)

Ed has been indulging in various forms of self-destruction in order to not feel his feelings, and steering the ship into the storm is his worst indulgence yet. This is the worst of his crimes - not beheading or arson or a red wedding. It’s when he tries to bring down everyone who has ever loved him into his misery, into believing what he believes. The audience generally (and Ed’s audience of Stede specifically) can forgive him for hurting strangers and for the non-specific mayhem whose victims we’ve never met; but it is much less certain that anyone will forgive him for hurting the only family he’s ever known.

The storm itself is the perfect metaphor for Ed’s attempt on his and, incidentally, everyone else’s lives. One of the most common metaphors used by friends and family members of addicts is that of a hurricane: that their addicted loved-ones tend to destroy everything they touch, anyone who was foolish or brave enough to stick around. And, like hurricanes, addicts aren’t malicious. Ed’s primary goal here is to get himself killed, not to kill everyone else. He wants the ship to go down so his death is certain. His firing a cannonball into the mast and asking Jim and Archie to fight to the death isn’t malice: it’s utter and complete nihilism. Nothing matters anymore. Nothing and no one. The end is near, and he’s so fucking drunk and high off these distractions that he couldn’t think about it if he tried. He’s manic with relief. (See also: “Finally.”)

And now for the finale: Purgatory. Buckle up, because this is where the addiction analogy gets real *chef’s kiss.* Purgatory is the equivalent of the morning after the worst, most rock bottom binge night of your life. You wake up with no one for company but the ghosts of your former selves. Now what?

Well, first - who is Hornigold to Ed? Why is he the guy Ed sees? It’s because Hornigold is another addict, if you will, but one who is (in this Purgatory hallucination) farther along in his recovery. He can impart some wisdom from that place, but he can also stand in as someone Ed can loathe because they’re not as different as Ed once thought, even if Hornigold can say he’s grown.

Hornigold tries to give him soup. He tells Ed, “Gotta get these nutrients into you,” and then literally shoves soup down his throat. That’s what it’s like in rock bottom. You don’t want to take care of yourself, but some lizard brain survival instinct takes over and makes you drink water, eat a piece of fruit, take yourself to the hospital. These things don’t really happen voluntarily that morning after, but you can still count on that instinct to kick in with some damage control.

Ed telling Hornigold how he “got here.” Hornigold says “Mutiny. It’s always mutiny.” Ed insists his mutiny was special, worse somehow. This whole scene is exactly what happens in your first recovery support group meeting. You go in thinking no one has ever been as fucked and fucked up as you are, which makes you feel isolated and alone. But then you get there and everyone else in the circle has done the same shit, been through the same shit. Ed’s not actually the devil; he’s just another demon, like many demons before him.

Ed worries he’s insane when he reflects on everything he’s done. Hornigold’s reply that “Feeling bad isn’t going to rebuild an abdominal wall” is a concept that people usually learn a little bit later in recovery, so I expect we’ll see more on this theme from Ed. Guilt is a useless emotion that only serves to conversely make the addict feel better but doesn’t help the harmed party: the addict feels like their suffering is cleansing, but it’s not - feeling guilt is just more self-indulgence, more self-destruction. Hornigold - a fellow addict in this moment - is trying to get this lesson to him early. It’ll return.

“You’ve got to move on or blow your brains out.” We’re getting back to Purgatory as the metaphor for the morning-after rock bottom, because this is the exact calculation that every person in recovery has done. They all had to answer that one big question. Your whole life is a mess, and you made the mess. Do you want to clean it up? Or quit? (Or make some soup? Yeah. That big question can’t be answered without basic needs having been met. So let’s eat. Let’s start there. It’s easier.)

Now we have Ed’s fantasy about opening an inn: This is also a common part of the morning-after rock bottom. You start thinking about the wrong turns you took, the mistakes you made, the way your life was supposed to go and all the reasons you’re not where you wanted to be. (And all the people you can blame for the fact that your life didn’t go as planned.) And when that honest part of yourself starts telling you that actually it’s all your fault… well, a) you don’t wanna hear it, and b) you can’t silence (kill) that monster, no matter how hard you try. You’ve got to face it. Face all those truths you’ve been running from for years. Now you have to think about it.

So now the big question, the inevitable math. Hornigold suggests looking at the pros and the cons. That’s the easiest way to break the calculation into manageable variables. This is probably my favorite moment of the episode, because when you’re sitting there, morning after the worst night of your life, everything is fucked - these are the exact variables that go into your equation. Do I really want to live? You ask yourself that, and because your life is in fucking shambles, you come up with the stupidest goddamn reasons to keep going. You wanna see the next seasons of Good Omens and Loki. You wanna eat your mom’s spaghetti again. Sometimes it’s nice when someone hugs you. It’s never the big things that save your life; it’s a bunch of the littlest things. The smallest comforts. The big things… they’re too unattainable. They’re too much to hope for, and they’re more than you could possibly deserve. What are the pros of living for Ed? Warmth, good food, orgasms. This is a stunningly accurate representation of the things that will keep you alive once you’ve hit rock bottom.

And then the cons: “I don’t think anyone is waiting for me.” This is why addiction is the better metaphor. There is no human experience more isolating than addiction. You are alone in more ways than you’ve ever been before. You have pushed away or pissed off everyone who ever cared about you. And even the ones who will maybe still be there for you - they can’t help you clean up the mess you’ve made. You have to do the work alone, even if they’re still willing to stand next to you. And this con… it’s the scariest one. Your list of little pros looks so pathetic next to the horror of being utterly fucking alone. Who is going to brave that for some stupid shit like Tom Hiddleston sexily flipping his hair back in that Loki way he does? Why should Ed carry on just because blankets are cozy and marmalade is pleasant?

This is where we get to the moment on the mountain, and what Stede represents. Hornigold tells Ed “You’re unlovable, and you’re afraid to do anything about it.” Ed could do two things about being unlovable: He could try to fix it, or he could end it all. Hornigold represents the worst part of Ed: his weaknesses and cowardice. And if Hornigold is in the driver’s seat, he’s going to end it all. He throws the rock off the cliff, and Ed gets dragged down into the water to drown. (Let’s also talk later about how often addiction is compared to drowning, and how nothing else in the show actually threatened Ed’s life - not Izzy with a gun, not all the rhino horn, not Jim’s cannonball - like drowning in his own mind.)

But then there’s Stede. Stede is how the pros win over that one big, horrifying con. Stede is hope. Stede is just a glimmer of hope. Hope is the most important thing you need in the morning-after rock bottom. As much as I enjoy the idea that it was love that saved Ed, I don’t think that’s a wholly faithful interpretation. Because Stede’s love for Ed doesn’t solve anything, doesn’t fix anything - it certainly doesn’t fix Ed. It cannot fix Ed. Hornigold just told Ed that he’s the one who has to “do something about it,” because Ed is the only one who can save himself. But even if Stede’s love for him in itself isn’t what saves Ed, Ed’s trust in Stede combined with that love gives him hope. Stede loves Ed, truly loves him, came back to him even though he knows Ed’s nature, knows his list of crimes, knows what he’s done to Stede’s friends and family. And maybe Ed can find in himself what he trusts Stede truly sees. It’s a “maybe,” not a certainty. But it’s hope. Someone loves him. Maybe he can love himself, too.

This Woman’s Work: I read this song as referring more appropriately to Ed’s relationship with himself, in no small part because Ed literally made himself the woman in the cake topper couple. All the things that should have been done, should have been said - they’re things Ed needs to do and say to himself. He’s got a little life and a lot of strength left. The journey has just begun.

I want to pop back quickly to a few other moments in The Innkeeper that resonated, starting with Stede and Izzy’s discussion about what happened to Ed: “He went mad. He was a wild dog.” Izzy describes Ed’s breakdown as if he was no longer the same person he once was; this is exactly what addiction does to a person. Ed hasn’t been himself; he’s been held hostage by his need for escape, and he’s become something else. Possessed, if you will.

Izzy: “You and me did this to him, and we can’t let the crew suffer any more for our mistakes.” I’m not writing an essay on Izzy (yet), but this is a very interesting perspective that says a lot about Izzy. Stede and Izzy both owe apologies to Ed, but they are not responsible for his actions. I predict we’re going to see this theme explored in later episodes as a part of Ed’s healing process and recovery. And also hopefully in Izzy’s growth.

Frenchie’s line that “We’ve been living second-to-second for a while now” is a callback to the impossible bird idea. Which, again, is just Chandelier x Sia. “I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down, won’t open my eyes, keep my glass full until morning light ‘cause I’m just holding on for tonight.”

So what’s next? For me, it was learning to sit alone in a quiet room with my thoughts. It was apologizing to the ones I hurt, because even if I didn’t mean to hurt them - even if I was suffering also and worse - they still got hurt, and in the end it didn’t matter why. It was developing the habit of liking myself, and acting on whatever self-love and affection I could conjure up. And yes… it was new seasons of Good Omens and Loki, my mom’s spaghetti, and hugs.

So I think Ed has a lot of accountability, reflection, and breaking of old habits in his future… but also warmth, good food, and orgasms. And good for him. That’s the beauty of recovery: we get to come back.

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd s2 #ed teach #edward teach #blackbeard #ofmd kraken #gentlebeard #stede bonnet #izzy hands #ed teach meta #ofmd meta #ofmd analysis #taika waititi #david jenkins #recovery #ofmd predictions #ofmd season 2 #ed x stede #blackbonnet

[merlins-booknook]

I have decided to make this reading blog of sorts bc my friend is still one book behind me and my cousin is not dramatic enough for me to feel satisfied with our talks on the books

So here I am. Ten pages left on the raven king. What the actual fuck is going on, idk. Like, EVERYTHING WAS SO QUICK AFTER THE BANQUET. WHAT THE FUCK DO U MEAN WYMACK IS KEVINS FATHER. I MEAN, YEAH, DADDY WYMACK FOR THE FOXES BUT, ACTUAL DADDY?? DID NOT SEE THAT COMING.

And the foxes being exited for Neil to take time with his "family" Lowkey actually destroyed me. I'm just, hating riko so much WHY MUST U BE A PSYCHOPATH AND AN ASSHOLE, EVERYONE HATES U RIKO, GET IT IN UR HEAD

Also, I have been saying this since I started reading but, RIKO WHEN I CATCH U RIKO, RIKO WHEN I CATCH U I made a tik tok on this audio with nail saying it and I have no regrets.

I have already started the last chapter, so ik that they do not tell the rest of his time with the Ravens, Wich is kinda scary but I have only read the first paragraph so, I'll have to fuck around and find out. I will only be able to start the following book once I finish my finals, so idk, I'll be back when I end the book and then a week later ig??

NEIL IS A FREAKING SAVAGE AND HAS NO FILTER ON THOUGHTS, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH I WANT TO TAPE HIS MOUTH SO HE DOES NOT PICK FIGHTS ANYMORE

If someone has the necessity to write spoilers, know that I will hate and find u ❤️ maybe

#andrew minyard #nora sakavic #neil josten #the raven king #the kings men #all for the game #the foxhole court #kevin day #the ravens #exy #books #reading #riko moriyama #aftg

[sublimecatgalaxy]

Teasy Fezco with a lil smut mayhaps and also the line “are you blushing?”

Maybe him and the reader are like rolling joints or something and they keep staring at his lips and skfksnfnsjglj

Also hey! I love you! Thank you for being such an amazing author and I hope the holidays are going to treat you better then they have already :)

The way you phrase requests make me want to just write all of them. I love you and your requests. I hope you have a happy holiday season too!!!

"You're not rolling fast enough, hand it over." I snatch the rolling tray from Fez, funneling as much weed as I can into the rolling papers as he pauses, lips parting in quiet shock as he steps up to the counter that I'm seated atop.

"Damn, alrighty." He chuckles, watching me intently as I lift the rolled blunt to my lips, sealing it with a lick up the side of it. Fez's eyes widen briefly before flickering away from me entirely, choosing to look anywhere but my hands and my lips. "I don't know how the fuck you got so good at that." He whispers, reaching up to run his fingers along his lips before taking the blunt from me, shoving another pile of weed and another paper into my tray.

"Been practicing." I shrug, repeating the same on this blunt like I did the last, licking a stripe up the side before twisting the ends, passing it to Fez who quickly lights it up, destroying my hard work in a moments notice.

"Yeah? With who?" He asks, chest puffed and eyes wider than usual.

"Someone more patient than you." He scoffs at the wink that I throw his way, his eyes rolling in defiance but it just makes me want to push his buttons even more.

"I'm patient." He grumbles like a child, arms caging me in between him and the counter beneath me, his head tilting simply at me.

"Incorrect." I poke his chest, finger trailing against his sternum and he sucks in a breath, tongue brushing out across his lips.

"Yo, it's bothering me- tell me who you been seein'?" He asks, neck craning so his nose is an inch away from mine and I grin wickedly, reaching out to shove him away from me with a laugh.

"I'm messing with you. I've just been practicing whenever I go hang out with Kat and Maddy. I'm their designated roller." His anger quickly fizzles away at my excitement, and instead a proud smile takes over his expression, hands clapping between us.

"Damn, got me all proud and shit." He snickers, his smile warming my chest and my legs squeeze as tightly as they can to subdue the ache between them at his boyish grin.

I resume the job best I can, funneling weed in between the papers before handing them to Fez, his nimble fingers lift the joints to his lips before sealing them the same why I did but it's ten times more distracting, my own eyes now stuck on his lips.

That is, until I notice the red tinge on his cheeks.

"Fezco, are you blushing?" I ask with a dramatic gasp, deciding to tease him and ask questions later, reaching out to take the rolling tray from his hands so he has no choice but to look down at me.

"Well yeah, you keep staring at my fucking lips, man." He mumbles bashfully and I hop down from the counter before reaching out to fist some of his t-shirt in between my fingers, pulling him closer to me.

"You have nice lips." I whisper, fingers sliding down his chest so I can link my fingers with his with a naughty grin. He stutters, eyes squinting as he peers down at me, smoke billowing around us from his discarded joint beside us resting in the ashtray.

Speaking of Ashtray, thank god he isn't home.

"Are you high?" He asks lowly and sincerely, chest rising and falling in calm breaths, hands squeezing mine tightly in a reassuring message.

"No."

"Then how come you flirting with me?" There's a teasing vibe to his voice as he presses me against the counter behind me, the air in my lungs suddenly escaping me.

"Am I not allowed to?" He laughs at my question, eyes lowering to gaze at my lips as his hands travel to my hips, fingers dipping into the exposed skin of my waist, giving me a careful look.

"You're in dangerous territory right now."

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o- Taglist: @bubblebuttwade @rafelover2405 @leslienjazzy @sorceresss @grxnde-dwt @alex–awesome–22 @bunnietoof @niyamar1e @serialghost @plantlungs @geniusohn @akaliltimmytim @lilaalouuxx @xshariex @elliotsbeigeguitar @elle4404 @lelieja @srhxpci @joselyn001 @taysirene @spinkspanther @thedivineuphoria @peter-maximoffs @tsukishimawhore @poohkie90 @szlaco @distantsighs @nstyles4299 @wolflover384 @givemefoodandlovesstuff @vane28282 @yeswhatever33 @amirrahfranson @vvaalleennttiinna @f-mu @yaspillz @jeyramarie @skylievin@abbybarnes17 @jointherebellion215 @visiondaddy @steezysimfinds @its-ya-gay-boi-luigi @crunchytoenailsyum@glizzymcguirex @beth123lg @melovesmut @rafecameronswhore @ariianelle @write-from-the heart @vampviolets@haylee-e @honee-chai-tea @lokiandbuckywife

@officiallyunofficialperson@heyaitsklaudia@rosepetalsparks @bluetreecloud20 @scenesofobx @double-shot-of-tequila @1dluver13xx @colbysbrocks @iamasimpingh0e @loveshineslikethesky @id-3-kbro @diorsitgirl @errorfound101-allideasburnedout @neverwillknowme18 @ellyskey @taylors-folk @loversjoy @myaloveee @thyris-is @lagataprrr @aaaaslaaaan @witxhy-lexx @minjix @luvroseee @tee-swizzle @savageneversaw @admiringlove @hysteriahall @piceous21 @starlightandfairies @igotmajordaddyissues @drewstarkey-wife1

#fezco #fez #fezco x reader #fez x reader #fezco euphoria #fezco euphoria x reader #euphoria #euphoria hbo

[night-dazai]

Making Geto Mad

Hello all this is the first time i am writing and i wanted to do a smut scenario , but i started writing a whole ass long story sorry 😭😭😭😭😭

word count is :1572

Forgive me and please let me know if i should finish the smut that i left half way at the end .

Your boyfriend Geto was the perfect man any woman could ask for, with his face, his body, voice, character, and all in all the perfect gentleman. In the whole 8 months of your relationship, he has never actually gotten mad or jealous in your eyes and even if he did he always told you and it was never a misunderstanding. This does not mean you did not have fights, but it has always been handled in a very mature way by your man and this was getting out of hand. You were a virgin before meeting this fine gentleman and true to his appearance he is a gentleman in bed, your first time was blissful and sweet and so have all your makeout sessions been. He has never once gotten rough with you, you were a glass doll he was blessed with and he would never break it for his pleasure … is what you thought. 

It has been 8 months since he changed, the famous but sweet playboy no one knew what he was. Only the people who slept with him or dated him knew him and his best friend Satoru knew that he was a devil in disguise. The first time you entered the school with your sweet-looking aura and tiny body he knew he wanted you in his bed. But little did he plan on falling for you, it was not in his plan but it happened. Your sweet voice laughing, your gentle smile when you saw him in the corridor but the way you turned cold as ice when fighting curses made his dick twitch and so did his heart. It's the first time he wanted to date a girl not to fuck her or just for entertainment. He wanted you, wanted your smile, wanted your body and your soul and he would take it at all costs. After getting you to confess to him he changed and released a bit too late. He could not force you to do anything, he was shocked when he heard you were a virgin. He wondered for nights how such a lovely flower was left untouched in this cruel world but here you were in his arms sleeping peacefully having no idea how badly he wanted to destroy you. He wanted to fuck you, he loved you no questions but he wanted fuck, rough hard and nasty, but he could not. Seeing the tears trickle down your cheeks the first time he entered you, he wanted to ruin you but held on. The way you held his arms trying to hold your life was so cute which made him wonder “Can she ever handle a rough man ?” and he decided no. Every time there was a fight he would go to Nanami to talk and vent but his friend being the calm and rational person he is always listened and told the mostly mature solution making Geto the mature person in the relationship. 

Shoko held your hand tightly as you scanned yourself once again in the mirror “You look sexy and can get 20 to 30 tonight, girl forget your man and enjoy the night “ she said hugging your waist as you looked doubtful. You had never worn such a short frock, the black material was almost transparent making your white inners slightly visible in a teasing way. “Do I look good in this ?” you asked doubtfully but before you could get an answer Gojo burst the room door open “It has been an hour girls let go!!” his voice high and whinny but when he saw you he dramatically opened his jaw and got on his knees “ marry me love I will al-” Ghetto kicked his friend in the ass pushing him aside walked up to you “ love, shall we ?”. His voice was soft and sweet he took your hands kissing your knuckles. You nodded your head and soon you guys started to the club. This was your first time coming to a club “Geto ..” you whispered in his ear to make sure he heard you in the loud place “Yes love?” he asked looking at you “I don't look weird right ?” you asked tucking a stand of your hair behind. Ghetto smiled and placed a glass in front of you “of course love why would you think that ?” he asked snaking an arm around your waist. You looked around nervously for a second and thought about what Shoko told you “ well… i feel kinda weird …” your tone made Geto’s face frown in worry “ why are you feeling sick or you dont like the music should we leave ?” he asked placing his glass down . “No no… just … “ you fidgeted with your fingers “ i might be wrong also but …i feel like people are starting at me “ you voice trailed low at the end . If Geto had not been close to you he would have not heard a word . Gojo and Shoko both were on the floor having a blast while you were trying to make your boyfriend mad. Ghetto smiled looking at you, his calloused hands rubbing on your checks “When my girl is so lovely looking how can they keep their eyes to them, they have to look your angle “ his voice was low and as he spoke in your ear your checkers heated “ oh…i see” you said turning your head and looking at your friends who were waving at you two to join them. You dragged your boyfriend to the dance floor trying to avoid his sly look which was making you squirm. As you were enjoying the floor you noticed how a group of men were approaching you and shoko “Darling, i will be back in a while “ Geto said holding your waist “Whyy..” you asked worried after noticing the group of men “ a puff dear only a little i will be back soon don't worry Gojo is here “ he said kissing your head he felt you with Shoko who was ass of drunk. You kept your thoughts to yourself and continued to dance when you felt someone grab your hand “ kitty want someone to dance with ?” asked a blonde while the rest of the group walked towards you and Shoko “ oiiiii… dance with me “ she said grabbing the man from you and dragging him away but you started feeling uncomfortable walked but before they could grab you again you were pulled backwards “ love are these your friends ?” a sweet voice cooed from behind you . Feeling safe you turned and hugged your boyfriend “Geto..” you mumbled in his chest while the men stopped and walked away “ love you wanna go home ?” he asked but you did not move or make any noise . “y/n look at me ?” he said worried taking your face he saw your glassy eyes small red lips and doe eyes .“Let's go back “ He said and dragged you out of the place with Gojo shouting behind him “ GETO…!!!” . Your ride back was quiet as you calmed down “ will Shoko be alright ?” you asked worried “ Shoko … i would worry about the man more “ Geto said and it was quite again . You soon realise he was taking you to his house and for some reason the air felt heavy in the car and the elevator .  

Due to a word limit this is ending mid way i am extremely sorry the next half in the posted .

Thank you for reading this and i accept any request !!

#geto suguru smut #geto smut #jjk geto #jjk smut #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #jjk x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen fanart #suguru #jujutsu geto #gojou satoru x reader #geto x y/n #geto x reader #geto x reader smut #geto fanfic

[tubchunk]

me spitting out all my thoughts here as i watch tubbo's vod

"YEP innocent" "innocent to me" yeah like qtubbo doesnt give a shit if fred is bad, he will burn it all down to find her

"its time for me to step into the sun, you know? and who cares if everyone else burns?" HOLY FUCKKKKKKKK TUBBO??????

"this is more than a villain arc, this is a lifestyle adjustment" oh qtubbo you are going to fly so close to the sun and youre going to burn and i am here for it all

"you wrong me? you're not gonna be around to tell the tale" HES SODHDJDBFBFJ QTUBBO ENJOYERS WE ARE SO BACK

"this is not a story of villains and heroes, this is a story of revenge" WHAT WAS IN HIS FOOD TODAY WHAT WAS HE ONNNNN LINE AFTER LINE IS HITTING

qtubbo knowing the server underestimates him and is now ready to show what he really is capable of YOU GO BABYGIRL

"this is a conflict where there arr no winners, just mutually-ensured destruction" goddamn he is on it today

GIRL 26 STACKS OF TNT?????????

"anything to get the upper hand, am i right?" AND THEN MENTIONING THE FED OFFICE WARP PLATE IS ACTIVE OH MY GODDDDDDD FED QTUBBO ERA????

"in my own experience, the members of the islandhave been much worse to me than the federation ever has been" oh my gOD YES QTUBBO FEELING THE FED PUNISHMENTS ARE STILL "JUSTIFIED" CUZ THERE WERE RULES BROKEN BUT THE ISLANDERS HAVE BEEN POKING AT HIM FOR THINGS HE CONSIDERS UNNECESSARY OH VILLAIN ARC TIME IS REALLLL

HE CALLED FRED "THE ONE PERSON I CARE ABOUT ON THIS SERVER" IM SICK TO MY STOMACHDBDBFGBDBFJFJ

qtubbo deciding that morning crew doesnt need to know about what hes gonna do, cuz theyll always be his boys :(

"i think we show them a healthy does of regret" his qcellbit is coming out !!

just imagining qtubbo with his airpods in as he is dramatic, bumping classical music

"the suit stays on until he's found, safe and alive" thr fact that qtubbo does all this, still in thr suit for his date GOD its so sad

that post that said qtubbo, a machine guy, tearinf every block down by HAND is important cuz that shows how genuinely furious he is. cuz he needed to feel the catharsis of tearing it all down himself.

why did he research warp plate mods to figure out where fred is😭😭 gay love stories are getting out of hand

"i made a promise today. i said i would break every block he has ever placed. *i* will break. fire wont break. tnt wont break. *i* will break." holy fucking shittttttttt he got possessed by qtubbo

FIT LMAOOOOO

qfit noticing and asking why qtubbo was at quackity's but as qtubbo askes him to leave him be, he did. he knew qtubbo would come to him when he wanted to.

COY PISO INTERMISSION!!!

qtubbo's action plan just being pushing qquackity over the edge that is so fucked up and i am here for this downward spiral !!

"i could mentally destroy him until hes a quivering ball of tears and regret on the floor" HOLY FUCK???????

"youre trying to turn me against the federation while actively doing thr same exact thing they're doing, the fucking hypocrisy" GOD i think qquackity is justified in his reasons BUT QTUBBO ISNT WRONG HERE!!!! IN HIS EYES, WHY WOULD YOU SAY THEYRE BAD AND THEN DO THR SAME THINF AS THEM???

him still saving all the stuff qquackity got from the eggs and others cuz "those seem important" GOD

"he doesnt need a hoise, cuz home is where the heart is. and i feel like thats a lesson he ought to learn. too bad that his is dead and cold" QTUBBO HOLY?????

"its like you never existed at all. thats my mission" girl youre speedrunning that descent into insanity and evil and i love you for it

"youre crazy. maybe i am! i dont give a shit!" wow hes so aware

"i didnt have a purpose before. but now its to make sure quackity never has a mark on this server" he didnt have a purpose and now, after losing fred, his purpose is to make qq pay holyyyy

"i never said i was morally grey, i said i would fuck up all his shit" LETSGO BABYGIRL

HIM GOING TO THE FED OFFICE TO PoSSIBLY SNITCH, CUZ THE ENEMY OF HIS ENEMY IS HIS FRIEND

NOT THE SERVER RESTART STOPPING HIM LMAOOOO

him literally saying he doesnt care and the enemy of his enemy is his friend yoo

qtubbo not being silly and walking into fred's office and just quietly moving on STOPPPPPP

NOT THE LORE SPOILERSSSSS LMAO

RETURN OF CUCURUCHO OFFICE PODCASTTTTTTTTT

"if youve become as bad as the thing you are trying to destroy to destroy it, yourr not better. youre just a replacement" BARS 🔥🔥🔥

qtubbo's voice instantly softening looking at fred's office and the desk plant he got STOPPPPP THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME

him replacing the flower on fred's desk with a poppy :(((

QTUBBO REPLACING THE WARP AT HIS HOUSE TO THE FED OFFICE OH I CAN FEEL HOW THIS GOES DOWNHILL

"why do i bother making anything to help the server? this is the thanks i get" oh yeah he is fully turning against everyone soon

oh god convo with qfit

oh i know qfit is concerned hearing qtubbo talk this way but theres nothing he can do to make him change his mind, so he just stays by him

"just to watch him. not say a word. just watch him" WATCHER QTUBBO??????

oh qtubbo is actuslly scaring me rn

"theres an old sayinf that 'if youre on the quest for revenge, dig two graves" "thats alright. i dont care if i burn as long as he does as well. maybe ill dig 3 graves. maybe ill take some other people along with me on the way" HOLY FUCKCJDJFJDJFJFJDJFJ QTUBBO YOURE INSANE I LOVE YOU SO BAD

"so i take there was no date?" "i was invited on one. it was real to me" GODJDDHFB IM GONNA END IT ALL

qfit still reassuring qtubbo that fred is okay, he still cares for qtubbo so much thats someone he has grown to care for

TUBBO SHOWING FIT WHAT HE DID TO QUACKITY'S HOUSE AND SAYING "like i said. like he never existed" AND THEN JUST BOUNCED????? GIRL.

qtubbo gaslight gatekeep girlboss

"is it more satisfying to destroy a person. or watch them destroy themselves?" AND WE ARR WATCHING AS QTUBBO ALSO DESTROYS HIMSELF BIT BY BIT OOOOOOOOH

his ass spoiling stuff again😭😭

snack break!

PHIL HOUSE TIME

qtubbo instantly leaving when he sees quackity joined and fred joined god

the curse of bad nees bringer tubbo about to strike again with wilbur LMAO

distracted to spy on wilbur so real

QUIRKYDUOOOOOO

qtubbo just carrying thr flower from fred's office in his offhand im sick

qtubbo warning qpac that he may hear some stuff about him that isnt true i. coming weeks, and qpac saying he trusts qtubbo 100% MORNING CREW MY FAMILYYYYYYY

PAC MY BELOVEDDDDD

not pac and tubbo arguing over who has to break the news to wilbur lmaoooooo

qtubbo qquackity's biggest hater rn

damn im sad tubbo crashed before the event but that laptop was hanging by a THREAD

#q!tubbo #qsmp #qsmp tubbo #qsmp liveblog

[hils79]

Hils Watches Mysterious Lotus Casebook - Ep 40 (and bonus episode)

God, okay, here we go. I'm so anxious. I remember how Heroes ended and how much it broke me

I've come this far though so I guess let's do this even if it's going to hurt. I have a packet of tissues on standby just in case it all goes horribly wrong as I fear it will

Well, we're off to a good start. Li Lianhua is practicing his martial arts and imagining Di Feisheng is there with him. I'm definitely not crying less than 5 minutes in

It's okay though because Fang Duobing is there to take care of him and make sure he keeps warm 😭

Okay, I suspected he rigged the mechanisms to be easily seen and destroyed because Fang Duobing mentioned it but I didn't realise the whole thing was him trying to take down Jiao Liqiao from the inside. I feel bad(ish) for him now

Oh shit! Well, it wouldn't be Mysterious Lotus Casebook without one final (I hope) dramatic poisoning

I love that he just calls him Xiaobao in front of everyone now. Everyone clearly knows they're together.

God, he's about to do something stupid isn't he? I'm having Word of Honor flashbacks. GDI even I didn't clock that he was deliberately sending Fang Duobing away so he could do this

Oh fuck

I am sobbing

I do not understand these two at all. First of all I thought she left him when she ended their engagement (that I thought was a marriage - that whole wedding that wasn't a wedding was confusing), then I assumed she must have left him when she took the sect leader job from him. Apparently after all that they're still together??? But maybe they're breaking up for real this time?

I suppose Xiao Zijin is going to blame Li Lianhua for this too

I knew he was going to get free and leave before Fang Duobing got back 😭

FFS I was already crying and now Huli Jing is crying so I'm crying even more. I knew this was going to be sad but FUCK

He just rescued a trapped bird like a fucking Disney prince

I knew the 'recipe book' was going to be all his martial arts notes

FFS Xiao Zijin let it go! I swear to god if he kills Li Lianhua because Li Lianhua is half blind and ready to die I am throwing my laptop out the window

OH FUCK IS HE GOING TO DO IT HIMSELF?

Oh, I think he was talking to his sword

Well fuck.

Oh, he landed in the boat. Maybe he's okay? Let me have my denial!

It feels like forever ago but I think this dude was telling the story of Li Xiangyi and Di Feisheng in the first episode. If he was that's a nice touch that we've circled back around and he's now telling stories about Li Lianhua

I have to laugh because the alternative is crying even more. But I love all these randos know that Di Feisheng is in love with Li Lianhua and they're acting like him not showing up at the beach is like jilting him at the altar (even though they're already married)

His stoic but clearly sad face 😭

Well he's still alive. At the moment at least.

I know he's talking about fighting, but he probably also talking about their relationship

I want to hug him

I'm fine 😭

Onto the bonus episode. This is either going to be hopeful or painful and I honestly have no idea which way it's going to go

Painful so far!

Well, that was very ambiguous so I'm choosing to believe they found him at the beach and are living happily ever after 😋

I did really enjoy that despite the pain. Thanks to everyone who has been yelling along with me in the comments and notes while I've been watching. This is why I enjoy liveblogging dramas

#hils watches #hils watches mysterious lotus casebook #hils watches cdramas #mysterious lotus casebook #cdrama

[sunrisemill]

✮From the start✮ Pt.4

Chris and y/n have always been inseparable, they’ve always relied on each other but what happens when one of them falls?

(Warnings: mentions of mental health such as Anxiety and possibly depression. Please take care of yourself, I love you 🤍)

Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Finale

Y/ns’ POV

(Present)

I feel a wave of anxiety crash down on me as he stares at me from across the dining table. How in the hell am I supposed to do this? I feel the tension rise within seconds as I remain silent, I just wish I could see what he's thinking. The look he has on his face is unreadable and stern. God, I've fucked everything up. I continue to tell myself that until I hear him clear his throat. “Well…are you going to say something?” Right, with my emotions at an all-time high, I completely forgot how much time had passed. “I'm so sorry, Chris,” I whisper before taking in a deep shaky breath. “It was wrong to treat you like that and it's okay if you don't forgive me, I understand. But I couldn't go on until I gave you an apology.” I watch him carefully as he processes my words. Please forgive me, please Chris. He nods his head before leaning back in his chair. “I'm sorry too. But could you just tell me what's wrong? You continue to shut me out and that's not healthy Y/n, you can't just bottle everything up and expect it to be okay.” He sits up straight and leans forward again, propping his elbows on the table as he reaches his hand out to gently hold my hand in his. His touch sends shockwaves throughout my body. “Just talk to me. I'm here.”  My chest tightens as I stare down at our hands which are interlocked. I can feel his eyes bore into my head as the air grows thicker. I can’t tell him, he's gonna think I'm being dramatic or I'm just being silly. Oh my god, he's gonna think that something is wrong with me, or that I'm too much for him to handle and he's just going to leave me. “Y/n?” The concern in Chris’ voice when he notices how my breathing has picked up causes me to spiral into a deeper panic. I lift my head to look at him but my vision is blurred by tears. Chris’ face drops when he sees me in such a distressed state. “Y/n, please talk to me.” The slight squeeze he gives my hand pushes me over the edge. I can't do this. I need to leave. Right. Now. I tell myself as I quickly drop his hand and shoot up out of my chair, the speed of my action causes the chair to fall back, but I don't care. The only thing I care about is getting out of that damn house. The sound of Chris calling after me is cancelled out as the sound of my heartbeat in my ears drowns it out.

~~~~

Chris’ POV

I feel as though everything just blew up within a few minutes. I shouldn't have done that, I pushed her too far now. I can't believe I had her back and now im watching her run out of my house because of my idiotic actions. “Y/n!” I shout out to her but she doesn't stop…shit. I quickly stand up to chase after her but get stopped by a tug on my arm, my head snaps to look at whatever has tugged on my arm and im met with my mother. “You have to let her go, Chris. She's not worth it.” Nothing but rage fills my senses as I hear those words leave her mouth. She's not worth it…How dare she say that about Y/n, she doesn't know her like I do.  “you have no idea what you’re talking about.” She looks up at me with sympathy. “I've seen enough to know that she's no good. If you go after her now she’s gonna trip up again and drag you down with her, I used to know people like her, and They did nothing but destroy everything in their paths. Do not go.” I stand there in pure disbelief. “So what? Im just supposed to stand here like a fucking imbecile when she's obviously distressed?!” I spit out as I yank my arm away from her, looking down at her with disgust. “Im not doing that again. Im going after her, whether you like it or not.” I give her one last gare before turning around and walking out of the house in search of Y/n.

~~~~

Y/ns’ POV

The sound of crickets chirping in the long grass and wind rustling withered leaves has an eerie but soothing sound. I can't believe I ran out of there but I know that's what I needed to do. I stare at the reflection of the moon across the lake as I think back to when life was simple before reality struck me like a bolt of lightning. I think back to when I was just a little kid sitting on the same ground that I am now, I remember a small Chris running to me to show me a small daisy that he thought I'd like. He has always been like that, the kindest soul I have ever known. But I just had to ruin it, ruin us. Sometimes, I think he would be better off without me, im only just dragging him down. He insists that he wouldn't know where he would be without me but I know… He'd be happier and not have to deal with all the stress and sadness I've caused. It's like I destroy everything I've ever touched, why can't I just be normal? I let out a silent sob as my fingers tangled through the grass below me, If Chris was here he'd tell me that it would be okay, that I'd be okay. But how could he be so sure of that? He’d be horrified if he took even a peek into my brain. I still remember how he looked at me on that night. “I’ve never met a girl like you before, I feel like all my problems go away when I'm with you. I'm so glad I get to call you my best friend.” I shake my head at the memory. How could I be so stupid? He’d never like me, he's gonna end up with a happy bubbly girl and realize how horrible I am. I bring a shaky hand up to wipe away the tears on my cheeks when I hear a voice. “I thought I'd find you here.” I keep my head down as I feel Chris sit beside me.

“Hey…” He whispers as he wraps his arms around my shoulders and pulls me close to him “It’s gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay.” I let out a small chuckle. “I knew you’d say that.” I sniffle, leaning into his touch, it takes me a moment but I finally look up at him. He lets out a sad sigh and brings his hand up to my face, wiping away the tears that continue to roll down my cheeks. “Am I that predictable, huh?” He asks teasingly with a slight tilt to his head. I smile softly as I take my chance to fully take in everything about this moment. The way his hair brushes against my face as he looks down at me. The moonlight casting a pale light around us. I bask in the comfortable silence between us, wishing it could last forever. “I'm so sorry Y/n… I shouldn't have pushed you-” “It's okay, Chris.” I quickly cut him off. “It's just… I'm not good at talking about my feelings. Ever since I was younger I was told I was sensitive and I was overreacting. Everyone made me feel like I was crazy when I would open up, they’d say it was all in my head but would never comfort me or even try to help me. So I thought that if I could hide my feelings we’d be fine, but it didn't work.” My heart drops down to my stomach as I open up for the first time. “I'm just so tired of it all…” I sigh as my head hangs low. “I feel like everyone is moving on with their lives and I'm stuck frozen in time. Look at me right now… one thing goes wrong in my life and I come running back to the lake.” I shake my head as I look back out towards the water. Why does this have to be so difficult? “I try so hard at everything but nobody seems to notice or care, But when somebody actually notices I chase them away 'cause I get scared that I'd be a burden to them, I feel like such a coward.” I whisper the last part as I wait until the moment when Chris finally speaks up. It takes him a minute but he tightens his arms around me as he whispers. “I'm sorry… I know how hard that was for you and I just want you to know that I'm so proud of you. I take back every word I said to you, You are not a coward Y/n, you’re the strongest person I know.” He ends that sentence by placing a kiss on the side of my head. Oh my god, he just kissed me. I'm sure it was just a friendly kiss. “You think so?” I whisper back, hope glimmering in my eyes. “I know so. You’ve gone through so much, Y/n. I’ve never been more proud of somebody else before. Just know…you could never be a burden to me, Y/n. I love you so much and I care for you so deeply, you can come to me always. I could be anywhere, I could be at a concert and I'd still drop everything to come see you” He looks down at me with his infamous boyish grin.  I smile back at him as I finally feel my tears dry up. “You love me?” I whisper in disbelief, how is this possible? He loves me back. He nods his head as he replies with a voice so soft that it puts clouds to shame

“More than anything.”

(A/n: Omg I worked my ass off on this one. I hope that you enjoyed it 🤭 the next part is gonna be the last one (don’t take my word on it cause I’m indecisive) anyways, thank you for reading, I LOVE U 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💋😽)

Tags: @guccifrog @junnniiieee07

#chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic

[fandomfaeofveryfewf4cks]

Things I noticed the nth time watching Nimona:

Knight armour can get sliced through like nobody's business (Balister's arm), but can take a laser hit without serious, body-altering consequences (Director hitting Ambrosius with a laser made from the same one that apparently has the power to wipe out half the realm, or kill an Immortal being who doesn't feel severe pain from an arrow wound)?

...is this because Ambrosius' armour was made to be more protective than Balister's?

"She manipulated BOTH of us." Ambrosius says this about Nimona, who he had very few interactions with aside from her very blatantly fucking shit up for the institute. How did she manipulate HIM?

I guess it probably makes sense when you consider he was going to arrest the director, implying that he believed Bal AND Nimona, but I dunno. The little rat in my head started running on its brain-powering wheel at all the possible fanfic plots this could lead to.

Nimona as Ambrosius grabbed the Gloreth statue when they fell to the ground.

On the one hand, this could just be actor!Nimona putting dramatic emphasis on how even in death, the leaders of the realm will cling to their hopes and beliefs, or the golden boy finally getting to join his ancestor.

On the other hand, we could make it deliciously angsty (yum yum) and say it is Nimona's personal desire to grab the statue of Gloreth for reasons such as: taking down the monster-killer image of her former friend out of anger and sadness because she never wanted that image to be so true in representing one of the few people who ever cared about her even briefly;

OR, While trying to think about how she would act if she were actually dying, she reaches for the closest thing to a friend that she has, but this is her staging a false death, as that particular friendship was false so this is just fitting, isn't it?;

OR, They wanted it to spread a message that with the fall of the director, would come the fall of the corrupt system they live in, as well as the fall of this narrow-minded view of both Nimona and Gloreth's story as well as Gloreth and Nimona themselves.

Nimona freaking out about the arrow in their leg in the comic vs Nimona treating it like a little scrape not to be worried about in the movie.

This is really interesting to me. In the comic, it's played up for humor like Nimona is almost overreacting, then having Bal take care of her because he does care about her. This shows it as a bit silly, but so very meaningful.

Then you have the movie where Balister is freaking out and it's kind of funny because clearly Nimona is relatively fine about it, so he doesn't really need to make a big deal out of it. Then he helps her and is still very careful about it like with anyone else's arrow wound, and asks her questions so he can better understand them. Again so very important.

I love both versions of these scenes, I just am so curious about why they made such a drastic change.

I love this movie so freaking much. (I knew that already, but it bears saying for the thousandth time. It's just so fucking good.)

For this last one:

TW: mention of police brutality (discussed as a theme in the movie, nothing specific outside of the Nimona movie)

"He's got a weapon." It's not a weapon. It's a phone. But Todd (and who knows how many of the other knights) didn't choose to see it as anything other than what the director told him it was, and destroyed it as he was trained to do. This screams messaging about the stupid, dangerous, and harmful actions of too many police officers who don't check the situation for themselves before acting on "information" they gathered from insufficient data and/or unreliable sources, and combine that with profiling to make decisions that so often end up being harmful and even fatal to others.

#nimona movie #nimona #theories #headcanons #things i noticed #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #angst

[hannahwatchesbigbrother]

This has been a worse than average endgame (to say the least), but I want to acknowledge the highlights of bb25. I’ve been watching since bb16 (been a feedster since bb17), and this has truly been the most invested I’ve been. Despite how frustrated I’ve been with production this year, I really think this season has some really stellar stuff in it (especially pre-jury). So here is a (lengthy) list of how I’ll remember this season:

Cirie motherfucking Fields showing up!!

Izzy immediately clocking that Jared was Cirie’s son before the live premiere even ended

Izzy immediately clocking that Cameron gives serial killer vibes

Felicia destroying four mics by the end of the first week

Felicia falling into the hot tub

“Clean that shit up a bit”

Cameron thinking Felicia was related to Denzel Washington

“Izzy Fields” and the beautiful friendship between her and Cirie

Hisam’s villain arc

Cory in Blue’s pink outfit (and later Americas jumpsuit)

(Honestly just Cory being a genuinely good dude who would call out things that crossed a line and fought against toxic masculinity)

The target flipping every other hour for like the first six weeks of the game

Every time Zach Wurtenburger tweeted about BB

The nickname “fucking Bowie Jane” which was then just shortened to fbj

The still of Cory’s mouth wide open while he was saying “what the fuck” when they were thinking of keeping Hisam

Meme’s storage room rants

“If I’m a have not next week, I’ll self-evict” “I’ll be a have not with you” *america leaves* “(to self) Cory, are you the most pathetic person? They were right about you — you’re a pick me”

Felicia yelling at Jag while he was in a chicken suit

Felicia and “Mr. B” (smooches!)

The slow burn Americory showmance (I could write a thesis on how much I love it but I’ll spare you)

The fact they brought the pressure cooker back

Izzy crying about how much she hates being in the same room as Cameron

“Fuck jag and I said that shit” -America Week 4, a prophet

When Matt used the power on jag and even live feeders were shook because we had no idea

The fact that Cameron’s 14 hours in the pressure cooker didn’t matter because jag was just brought back into the game

Blue sucking up to Felicia bc she thought she was Jared’s mom for a solid 24 hours

Felicia’s sleep screaming/singing

The dramatic and out of no where red/Cameron break up

“Cam thinks he’s like a father to me, but really he’s like an absentee father who wants to sleep with my girlfriend”

Blue volunteering jag to go up as a “pawn” during Jared’s hoh

Cam winning hoh after being blindsided by the red vote (hate him but the absolute silence and his thumbs up is so funny)

“Okay Jasmine” “*crying* who’s jasmine?” “*singing* a whole new world”

Cam not telling anyone including production who he was putting up

Matt winning the prize swap veto but choosing the punishment bc he thought he’d get to hang out with the real Josh Duhamel

The Josh Duhamel punishment in general

Izzy’s kick jump during the piggy pals punishment

Jared destroying his game because Cirie was stuck in a kayak with Felicia for 48 hours

THE IZZY FLIP

(The fact the izzy flip happened bc she told Cory that he couldn’t sleep in the same bed as America anymore lol)

The Cory/Jared humiliverse fight

“To all my friends and family, trust I know that they are all liars and snakes… and cowards!”

“See you soon, pig!”

The Cirie/Felicia fight post-Jared’s eviction

Peak Unreliables when Jag fought for Cory’s LIFE against cams plan to backdoor him

People retweeting Meme’s tweets from over ten years ago that were weirdly relevant to the season

America lifting Cory after it was confirmed that they made jury

The musical that Cory got for his zing

The one time all the different stans came together was to celebrate Cams eviction

The “exquisite” bit

America causing Jag to want to shit his pants after telling him to “literally fuck off”

“Literally in this world, I am your biggest fan” 😭😭😭

Felicia being Cirie’s best friend and worst enemy (aka when she shaved her foot on her bed)

Americory saying “I love you” on Cory’s way out the door

Americas shrine to Cory/transforming into him

Cirie’s DR of her flipping off Jag, Matt, and Bowie

Izzy/Paige going as Americory for Halloween

The Americory “cradle robber” Halloween costume

“I’d be more impressed if [the wins] weren’t against two senior citizens, an airhead, and an idiot”

#bb25 #obviously I’m a big Americory fan but I also really loved watching Cirie Felicia meme Izzy and Hisam #sorry this is so long but I feel like it’d be nice to remember some of the great moments ☺️ #bb #big brother

[hwaightme]

Your fan, Seonghwa (part 1)

(your fan ml)

🛸 pairing: seonghwa x nerdfluencer & physicist!reader 🛸 genre: romance, fluff, mutual pining 🛸 summary: a bulletpoint-style wordstream of what it would be like if seonghwa was stanning you 🛸 wordcount: 5.4k 🛸 warnings/tags: language, SCIENCE, astrophysics, may the force be with you, scientific formulas, lego obsession, yunho driving, hongjoong jealousy and fatigue, seonghwa just wants someone to be a nerd with, lmk if anything else 🛸 taglist: [temporarily removed because... dumblr] 🛸 a/n: Hello there my loves <3 here is part 1 for Your Fan Seonghwa! The end is nigh and I am in denial ;~; Much love and biggest hugs <3

"Hold up, are you... no.... NOT THIS!!! NOT LIKE THIS!!! GUYS WE HAVE LOST HIM!!!

A wild Wooyoung crashed Seonghwa's dorm room, and yelled bloody murder as he saw what could only be described as cursed scriptures on the older member's phone screen. It was unmistakable... they were FORMULAS... EQUATIONS... THE MOMENT WHEN MATHS SUDDENLY HAD MORE LETTERS THAN NUMBERS...

"What???? What is happening???" a confused Mingi, who was passing by the room while walking down the corridor, called out and peered in. Wooyoung was crouched on the floor, clenching his shirt as though he was having a heart attack.

"He is... HE IS WATCHING PHYSICS LECTURES." That was enough for Mingi to shriek, and be joined by San, who collapsed onto his knees right at the door, and beat it a couple of times with his fist, and screamed:

"HE HAS BEEN POSSESSED NOOOOOO..."

"I think I am about to pass out this is disgusting..." Wooyoung whispered to himself, not noticing Yunho creep into the room, assessing the damage.

"Bro you are supposed to be a role model and you do this?" Yunho asked shaking his head in disapproval.

"This is to answer the question of whether Tatooine's twin stars could be a real thing and actually have planets forming around them. It is really nicely explained and informative, and I highly recommend it." Seonghwa's voice remained level while he was observing the reactions of his fellow members - just as he had expected, and intended.

"That's what they all say... and then they go get a degree..." Yeosang interjected while walking by the room, every bit a mourning man.

"Hey STEM is also cool!" Seonghwa added making the group erupt in waves of groans and gasps.

"WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON, YOU TRAITOR?" Wooyoung shouted out, having turned borderline manic at this point.

"I really can't see why we split the sciences and liberal arts in such a hardcore way. I mean, the really awesome stuff happens when we combine them, right?"

The eldest member was just having fun taking the piss at this point, knowing that if anybody was distant to science, it was the majority of ATEEZ. With the exception of Yeosang, but he felt the natural sciences to be a moral trigger so he was not destroying the 'not quite STEM fond' agenda.

"You know what, keep on watching it you corrupt man, but out of my sight for my sake."

"First of all, you are the one who barged into my room for some fucking reason. Second of all, okay then, I'll tell you about dark matter and dark energy later."

"What?" Wooyoung, who had already picked himself up off the floor and was in process of slowly getting out of the room, suddenly froze and turned his head dramatically.

"Space is fun, you should 'open up your eyes open up your mind' a bit."

"Yeah that's why I'm asking you to give me that space and keep some space between us. I don't want to have a stress-induced stroke or something."

"Do you even have a brain to have a stroke with?" Hongjoong entered the room, making his way to his bed, done with the younger member's antics, and moderately disinterested in whatever cursed content Seonghwa was indulging in in his free time.

"I swear, the more time I spend in the studio, the more shit goes down at home and I end up finding out via Twitter or as a public announcement. Can science explain that, Hwa?" Hongjoong called out while rubbing his face with his hands in an attempt to fight sleep.

"Nah, don't know anything about psychology, sorry."

"Oooh how does that make you feel Joongie?" San tried to prod.

"Scram, you menace, show's over." Hongjoong aimed with a pillow, ready to start physical violence, but the threat seemed to carry across well enough, "San, I have yet to think of consequences for you and your bloody international conspiracies, so for you I am auto-pissed."

"Aight, I'm boutta head out." Yunho raised his hands and grabbed both San and Wooyoung by the collars, and dragged them out. Mingi was polite enough to just follow along.

"Have a NICE TIME!" Seonghwa merely smiled as a frustrated Wooyoung slammed the door to the older member's dorm and stomped off, obviously not satisfied with the lack of a scoop. He was in dire need of tea, and the one member that had not yet revealing ANYTHING at all was just going insane with his space obsession - not good enough.

Seonghwa knew that he would not be attacked. He had a foolproof strategy to hide himself. And it was the power of natural sciences and mathematics. All he had to do was switch screens and he would have one of your 'professional' videos playing. One where it was just your voice, and a digital blackboard occupying the entire screen, with you writing formula after formula.

He found it challenging to pick up on all the things you said in your more academically intense videos (at least straight away), but your passion was addictive, and Seonghwa had discovered that you were brilliant at providing analogies for concepts that were hard for him. This had resulted in him proudly being able to calculate redshift, and relative magnitudes (with these endeavours having been done in secret, on envelopes or napkins, out of everyone's sight).

This kind of study-along had become one of the ways in which Seonghwa decided he could connect with you without being grilled by the other members. The only one who had raised an eyebrow and had taken his behaviours with suspicion had been Hongjoong, but with no other evidence, the captain could not make him walk the plank.

If he wanted to unwind and treat your videos almost like relaxing ASMR, he either went to your other channel where you did 'researcher vlogs' or focused on the videos that were whole sessions dedicated to simply nerding out over your favourite things. Which just so happened to be incredibly similar to his. To Seonghwa, there was nothing better than your ability to combine your professional knowledge and total shitposting.

He loved how you would include Star Wars memes in otherwise serious videos. How you would dive into the great depths and divulge the details of something like the impact of destruction over Endor, or the flight dynamics of space craft in Star Wars, or the famous discussion of vibrations in space, and how all sound in the movie should be treated as an interpretation for the audience, rather than something that the characters could actually hear.

You had also mentioned a couple of times about Star Wars figurines and LEGO sets, which had sent his heart ablaze, but so far, had never shown even as much as a hint at a collection - which he had written to you about in the comments of one of your YouTube videos using a fake account.

He had almost squealed when he saw that you had favourited the comment, and replied to it with a quick 'perhaps soon ;)'. It really meant nothing, and anyone could have written the same thing in half a second, but it was you, and he suddenly understood in much greater depth how ATINY probably felt when he read their comments out during a live.

Seonghwa had discovered you when searching for a clip from one of the Star Wars films, a clip which you had just so happened to have analysed. He had been curious about what you had to say, so he simply clicked, not knowing that this was the start of something much greater.

First, the thought you were a YouTuber who produced Star Wars related content. Next, he thought you were an adorable nerd who liked space. Then, he thought you were an incredibly intelligent and multifaceted individual who had a broad range of interests, fascinating experiences, and a passion for science. And finally, he figured out that you were a fully fledged researcher working towards her PhD in astrophysics in a high profile institute, were hilarious, what he would consider a genius, and yet were supremely humble, down to earth (he found it interesting to describe you in that way while you were studying everything that surrounded the planet) and so genuine.

He did not consider himself a fan at all, because he simply wanted to get to know you, off camera In real life. Seonghwa had a crush on you from the get-go. And the opportunity to meet had presented himself out of the blue, and on the best day possible, when a schedule had just been canceled. In the community tab on your channel you had announced that you would be doing a small meet and greet in a specific location, and that if anyone wanted to pop by during a set period of time, you would be there.

It was set. He was going to pull 99z tactic and make a run for it. This was critical. Much to his dismay, once he checked the map, he saw that the 'venue' you had chosen, which turned out to be one of the 'dream-ity' cafes was... far. Very far. Especially for him, since it was either public transport and high exposure risk, or walking which would just send him to go meet people in the after life instead.

He had no choice. Seonghwa needed a partner in crime. But there was only one who fit the role anyways. He needed Yunho. Upon receiving a cryptic text from the eldest member, he ambled into the room, a smirk on his face.

"So? What do you need me for? Does Cinderella need to head to the ball?"

"Honestly, kind of. I need to attend this one event, but it is far." Seonghwa kept his descriptions vague, not wanting to reveal too much too soon.

"Why not grab one of the drivers?" Yunho narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms.

"This is a private matter."

"Well you know I need details now. And I am not moving anywhere until I get them."

Yunho could feel where this was going. He could see that familiar glint in Seonghwa's eyes. This was peak 'I am crushing, I know it, but I don't want to tell you' behaviour. Finally, the old man found a potential special someone. This was a day to celebrate.

"I said, private." Seonghwa reiterated. Yunho did not really need to know the details, because he was already on board, but it was fun to annoy Seonghwa when he could.

"Hey, what if you are going to go be murdering people, then I would need to bring cling film and plastic bags at least. State your business."

"If you drive me there I know you will snoop anyways, so why tell?"

Damn. He was good.

"Oh that sounds spicy, okay I'm in. But wait shouldn't we let Hongjoong know that we are going out? It'll be less suspicious that way - too many members have made the mistake of not having him on their side already."

"You make a good point, JOOOOOOOONG?" Seonghwa stood up to start getting ready. If he was to make it to the fan meet closing, he needed to be heading out of the door right about now. Yunho caught on and rapidly hobbled out to grab his jacket and mask against any in-car paparazzi photos.

"Yo?" Hongjoong poked his head into the room, and took a swig of the mid-evening coffee he had in his hand.

"Yunho and I are going on a trip." Seonghwa explained, whilst inspecting himself in the mirror, styling his hair.

"In our favourite rocket ship." Yunho returned, playing with the car keys, and decided that Hongjoong needed a bigger headache today.

"Zooming through the sky." Seonghwa understood the assignment and picked up on the song cue.

"Little Einstein." Yunho leaned over and whisper screamed into Hongjoong's ear, making him shudder and lean far back.

"What in tarnation?"

"Don't worry about it Joongie we shall be back shortly."

"Uh so no one will explain why??? NOR WHERE????"

Hongjoong shouted at the already closed front door.

But little did Seonghwa and Yunho know, Hongjoong had a talent for running down the emergency stairs of the apartment building faster than the elevator moved. And he also could hide behind the car so effectively, that the pair only noticed his form chilling in the back seat when Yunho had already started the engine and was about to drive out.

"Hongjoong WHAT are you doing here, how???" Seonghwa yelled after having his soul momentarily depart from his body when he saw Hongjoong's dark silhouette in the front mirror. In the meantime, Yunho was struggling to contain a fit of giggles, and was grasping onto the steering wheel for dear life.

"I have special powers. And I want to find out who you are going to go meet and hell's ass o'clock. I don't need another midnight concert-goer or gym rat."

"Don't worry, I'm more tame than that."

Yunho smiled to himself. There already was progress - Seonghwa was revealing more and more about who in the world he wanted to go see.

After having finally arrived to the location, with Hongjoong whining that it was so far and that the other members were probably already burning the dorms down, they stopped. Seonghwa made no move towards getting out of the car, instead looking off into the darkness, observing some figures moving about.

He was trying to make sense of where you were, so that he could find the best moment to enter the scene. The other two members went quiet at the same exact time, just observing Seonghwa, who seemed to have been able to locate a target.

He spotted you waving to a couple of people who just departed from the cafe, officially leaving you as the only one left. The cafe had already closed, so you were loitering outside, and checking something on your phone. Illuminated by the streetlights, you were like a fairy tale. It was difficult for Seonghwa to convince himself that it actually was you in front of him and not some illusion. What if it was just his wishful thinking? Well, only one way to find out.

He huffed, threw on a black cap and checked his mask was not wonky, and opened the car door. Hongjoong was about to call out to him, but Yunho was quick to react and rapidly extended his arm out, nearly hitting the captain in the face but at least preventing him from making noise.

Seonghwa bolted to you as soon as he looked around and confirmed that there were no curious eyes - he was not about to lose all rationality, as much as he wanted to.

Yunho and Hongjoong were watching the scene unfold with wide eyes and jaws dropped to the floor. Only now did Hongjoong realise that this weird outing was about that ONE YOUTUBE PERSON Seonghwa kept on watching. Hongjoong should have seen it coming, considering how a couple of members had found love via social media. Of course, Seonghwa was going to be an internet creep. How else.

"YO YUNHO WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?"

"Livestreaming for chat, duh. I'm sending updates."

"THE GUYS DO NOT NEED TO KNOW??? Hey give me the phone-"

"Can you even reach that far? Hah Woo is flipping out and saying he is sad he can't say 'no bitches' to Seonghwa every morning anymore."

"Seriously though stop sending pics this is literally-"

"Once ATEEZ, always ATEEZ. We know ALL."

When Seonghwa approached you and called you by your name, you were all ears. For some reason, you had felt the need to stay behind, just a little longer. Your heart had told you so - and apparently, it was clairvoyant or very well-attuned to world vibrations. Here was a mysterious stranger, clad in black, talking to you. Part of you was a little afraid, but there was nothing a little lab-made spray that was in your pocket could not do. You put away your phone, and began to reach for the item, but at the last second decided to ask for your fan's name.

Seonghwa could not lie. It would not sit right with him. Besides, he only recently had seen what kind of shit went down when that happened - also known as San fighting a love war on too many fronts. So, after a moment of deliberation, he uncovered his face, and quietly whispered a "Park Seonghwa..."

And that made you flip, as you clapped your hands in excitement, your face lighting up with the widest grin you could muster.

"SO WAIT WHO EXACTLY IS A FAN OF WHO? WHO IS TAKING PHOTOS WITH WHO?"

Seonghwa was unable to process, basically forgetting that he was an idol and people could know him, even though seconds ago he was in full sneak mode. Hearing you say his name with so much glee did things to him.

"Uh... I am... definitely... A fan... so..." he was trying to force out, unable to break focus from the joy you were experiencing.

"Well same here! And more specifically yourself! I'll be honest, it's one of your Lego assembly lives that did it and introduced me to ATEEZ, since uh, you know, we are fellow Star Wars appreciators."

Seonghwa totally was not contemplating whether it was considered too early to marry a person who he had officially met only a couple of minutes ago.

It was not the stage presence, nor was it the talent and skill oozing from this man that had been the thing that hooked you in initially. You had grown to appreciate that later, and became a bit of a fan, but what had been the little lightbulb moment that helped you discover Seonghwa and ATEEZ, was Lego. You were a proud internet dweller, and enjoyed traversing content that was associated with your areas of interest regularly, so as soon as you saw Star Wars and Lego in a just finished livestream on a channel called ATEEZ, you had to check it out.

And that was how you came face to face with an incredibly handsome, yet somehow still cute man who was raving about what was your favourite game, toy, arguably way of life, of all time. All at once. After reading through some comments that were under the video, you figured out his name, his occupation, that "his duality was no joke", that he was "ethereal and was making people melt", that people would be happy if he rearranged them like the little building blocks, that his name was star related... and that he was an avid Star Wars fan.

Well there was no choice for you but to at least respect this man. And that respect, quickly enough, turned into you listening to "This Is ATEEZ" on loop on Spotify, and making your colleagues passively memorise some of the songs because of how many times they had graced their ears. Their videos were probably the only deviation from the usual astrophysics lectures and movie clips that you had in your recommended on YouTube, and you were pretty happy with that. They hit your 2AM 'need to work on my five projects but am derailed by sleep debt and lack of caffeine' funny bone alarmingly well.

Once your a tid-bit oblivious self finally recognised the legend that was in front of you, you became an unstoppable wave of compliments. It was only fair, and the least you could do. He had come to your meet and greet, waited for hell knows how long, all while most likely having a billion other more important things to do.

Seonghwa was blushing into infinity, but you continued. You mentioned that you often cranked up ATEEZ tunes when working in the labs, and Seonghwa was ready to become total mush then and there.

Your conversation then eventually turned back to the original point of the fan meeting - to talk science fiction and outer space, and you stated that you would be more than happy to show Seonghwa some of the more serious work that you did. Realising that you were pretty much asking him out, Seonghwa was giddy, and wasted no time in agreeing with you and asking when.

Without thinking about it much and just deciding on the spot to take the risk, you ask for his phone, saying that ,such ventures would require closer collaboration', with a smile.

In the meantime, Hongjoong was screaming in the car, having a metaphorical heart attack, while Yunho was now on video call with the rest of ATEEZ, doing something similar to a live broadcast - an attempt which the captain could hear was being guided by none other than Yeosang, who, amidst the hoots and tease after tease, was explaining (unprompted) the theory behind live on-scene reporting as though he had been called on by a teacher.

Hongjoong could not take his eyes away from the exchange between you and Seonghwa. While he could not say many details about you, his friend was like an open book to him, and every twist, every turn, every tilt that he could recognise (no thanks to the distance between the parked vehicle and the two of you), Hongjoong could see that Seonghwa was deeply into you. Far too deeply for it to be just a little passing interest.

As Seonghwa texted you and you confirmed the numbers have indeed been exchanged, you suggested to take a photo together, so you could use each other's halves for profile pics and he decided that he was yours even if you did not need him in your life. A resounding series of 'brooooo's resounded from the call as Yunho tried to focus the camera on the scene, despite Hongjoong shouting 'creep' at him.

After setting up communication, organising what you both had agreed was to be a date and parting ways, Seonghwa waddled back into the car like the happiest duckling of all time. Literally could not speak while Hongjoong was punching his shoulder repeatedly.

Yunho shook Seonghwa's hand and Wooyoung could be heard HOLLERING over the phone and begging for Yunho to show Seonghwa's face, which was glowing. He became eternal sunshine.

--

For your date (and yes he kept on chanting this in his head) Seonghwa decided to make you a rose out of Lego, and glued it together so that it could be a permanent piece that would not be damaged while being transported. Whilst in the process of making it, he had to fight off the 99z menaces, only managing to get rid of them when he went against his nature and littered the floor with spare Lego pieces like a minefield.

Hongjoong has been on edge ever since the so-called fan meet, eyeing Seonghwa whenever he would as much as touch his phone, and try peek over his shoulder if he began to smile like a lovesick fool. The captain was doing just about the same thing now, watching Seonghwa as he was making finishing touches on the rose.

"Hey, Hwa, can I at least meet her? Or like learn more about her?"

"As long as you don't stalk me and her, and meet her not in person not right now, sure."

"Bruh."

"I know you can and do creep on the interwebs."

"Dang it. The sad part is that you're right. Okay give me just like.... a rundown? Can I trust her?"

Seonghwa, proud of the gift he had just finished making, was now in the process of tidying up, carefully wiping the floor.

"If it helps, she is the kind of person to have to-do lists, me and her literally have an agenda set out, and she sent all location and time details in advance."

"Shit okay she is responsible-"

"She participated in a rocket launch."

"YOU WHAT FAM??" Hongjoong was shaken. How did this person have time for everything?

"Yeah. She is an astrophysicist, so she wasn't designing the rocket per se, but contributed in a different project phase."

"Damn, she might even be able to understand the ATEEZ lore with that brain."

"Uh huh."

"Can I come with you?"

"No." Seonghwa shut the leader down with a smile, twirling the flower between two of his fingers, as he thought about the evening ahead.

--

Judging from your reaction to the surprise present, the rose might as well have been a newly discovered star - that was how you admired it, how you handled it, and how you turned into an automated praise dispenser towards Seonghwa - he was glad that the institute where you had decided it was safest to meet had a penchant for 'conserving energy' and kept the lights relatively dim, so you could not see just how red his ears were.

You decided that the best place to begin the tour would be the mini planetarium that was housed inside the institute. Seeing as you had exclusive access even after hours, it was an opportunity one simply could not pass up. As you led Seonghwa from one exhibit to another, and managed to guide him through it thanks to being here countless times already, you notice just how immersed he was, and caught flashes of near boyish excitement as you threw in a couple of references from popular culture, be it your favourite franchise or details from movies like Interstellar or The Martian.

Moving along, you led him to one of the stronger telescopes that were on site - even though they were not much compared to those in an observatory, and were more for fun rather than for research and real observation, it was definitely enough to make Seonghwa send out a barrage of questions regarding anything he could spot. To you, it was a rare occasion to meet someone outside of your field of work who was equally as excited about all things space. And of course, it was even rarer to have that person be a crush of yours.

Then, it was time for the final destination. Your pride and joy, one that you had spent quite some time decorating. Your office. Well, technically you shared it with other post graduates but they allowed you to go ham on the interior design so you considered the office to be mainly your space.

And THAT was where Seonghwa saw some parts of your collection, and was completely blown away. There was a glass cabinet position against a wall a bit further away from the entrance, and in it, he would spot The Razor Crest, a Hoth AT-ST, R2-D2, Luke Skywalker's Landspeeder, and many, many more. He gravitated towards the display, and his mind was spinning from the sheer glee of seeing such beauty. As he was taken by the sight, you left his side for a couple of seconds, and then returned, and poked his shoulder lightly.

When Seonghwa turned his head, he nearly yelped.

"Is that... A box... for the Mos Eisley Cantina?"

"Yeah, and I was wondering if you wanted to... assemble it, together?"

"A HUNDRED TIMES YES?"

You had never seen a man drop to the floor that quickly before. In a matter of seconds, Seonghwa was sitting, as one might say, 'criss cross apple sauce', and patting the space next to him, in front of him, wherever just please let's unpack this and get to it.

So you spend the whole night just making the model on the floor of your office, in your own little world, enjoying life.

Which of course meant that he came home at... 6AM, disregarding seventeen missed calls and forty-two texts from Hongjoong, looking like the happiest man alive. Which made the captain melt as he stored away the insults and scolding session he had prepared for later use - because it was Seonghwa after all, Seonghwa could be forgiven, and Seonghwa would make him clean the room probably.

So instead, he sat by Seonghwa's side as he flicked through photo after photo after photo, showing Hongjoong progress pics of the Lego assembly, with very aesthetically pleasing photos of you sprinkled all over his camera roll. It was far too clear - Seonghwa was down bad.

They had not noticed Yeosang slink into the room, but considering that he had stayed politely quiet, accepted his presence.

"Is my man... a goner? Do I need to ask my girlfriend to make a funeral fit?" Hongjoong asked.

"Hyung it is more likely to be a wedding fit do you see how smitten this guy is?" Yeosang interjected, posing a counter.

"Yeah and that is what scares me, I am barely keeping all of you guys under control and if this guy also goes off into a different orbit then I am actually going to be in a permanents crisis."

"Hongjoong you already are in a crisis... like all the time..." Yeosang was ready to fire this fine morning.

"And I am going to go into a melt down if Seonghwa is also gonna be out of it. My guy, if you crack and start sneaking out on top of spending so much time hell knows where I will actually lose my marbles, I need at least one responsible adult with me."

"Can I invite her over then? She'll be the responsible adult." Seonghwa quipped, stopping his swiping on one of his favourite photos of you, where you were concentrated on attaching a particularly small piece.

"Dude that is kind of..."

"Really she is so awesome. If anything, I would kick everybody else out." Seonghwa joked, though immediately apologised under his breath out of fear of getting the notorious slap of justice.

"Then what's the point?" Hongjoong was confused at the older member's logic.

"Well if you don't want me out of the dorms, that's my solution."

"I don't want you to be fully out of it, that's my point."

"Out of what?"

"The sigma grindset, maybe?"

"Bruh what even. Hypocrisy at its finest. Plus you yourself said she is responsible and an absolute legend." Seonghwa was not on board with the captain's attempts at stopping him. It only made him want to continue meeting up with you even more.

"That she is. I actually googled her not too long ago. Damn, she is... SMART. Have you seen how many sciency papers she wrote? And they are in journals!?" now that came to Seonghwa as a surprise. Although he knew a lot more about you in the personal sense, and enjoyed learning about your hobbies and interests, he had never fully dived into the work you did as he had deemed it above him, thus not a point of focus.

"Wait really? I did not look into that part, since I-"

"No you really have to take a look, it's crazy. If you think that her channel is intense with info, this is next level. Those papers lost me at the title."

-

And so, Seonghwa looked. And looked some more. Tried to read. Pretended to understand or at least skim and appreciate even though it made him progressively more miserable and planted seeds of doubt and ridiculous conclusions that he was somehow 'inadequate'. And on your subsequent dates, Seonghwa became more and more preoccupied with appearing 'smarter', rather than fully being himself. He wanted to be more academic with you, feeling like that was what you deserved. As days turned into weeks, he found himself regularly looking at your work, reminding himself that he would never be able to achieve this, and regarding you as someone out of his league. He was prone to self-doubt, and here, out of the blue, all fuses were blown and all alarms triggered. The final straw was when a student, younger than both of you, who was doing a research placement at the institute, gave you a call, and Seonghwa could understand virtually NOTHING that was said aside from hello and goodbye even though he was pretty sure all had been in Korean. He wanted to shut down. He could not imagine keeping up.

Thankfully, you knew a thing or two about stars and could tell when they started to shine a little less brightly.

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