#so thats why ive always been upset about how light skinned i was

[pacifymebby]

How would dark/yandere!peaky boys react to the reader asking for a break up (if they're dating) or divorce (if they're married) since reader gets uncomfortable with them now and finally notices their really possessive and unhealthy behavior? I have a feeling this most certainly won't go well

thx so much lovely❤️‍🔥

Thank u for this anon, not something ive ever tried to write before

Feel like this goes without saying lads but these wee headcannons depict sometimes abusive relationships that some people won't enjoy and may find upsetting. Please if u think it might upset u or put u at risk of harm, don't read them. (Im going to post some light stuff tonight too later on dont worry)

Tommy

🌿I'm not gonna lie, i don't think he'd let it get that far

🌿He's always in control, always pulling strings, no one thinks, feels or does anything without him knowing their desires before he does.

🌿He can read people like books, understand them deeply within only a few conversations, thats why he's so good at manipulating people and situations to get his own way.

🌿So if you are breaking up with him... Its because he wants you to, its just another microscopic cog in his catastrophic plan ect. ect.

🌿 Youre not leaving him, he's letting you leave... For one reason or another

🌿 It might be strategic, might be a way of taking the decision out of your hands, hes involved with some dangerous men and he wants you out the way for awhile, so he can be sure nothing will happen to you. If this is the case youll be dead to him, publicly, and as far as youre concerned. He'll cut you off completely, the only way youll be able to get through to him is if you march up to his front door.

🌿If he's letting you get to the point you actually try to leave him, he'll probably let you do it... If he shows you what life is like without him, how weak and feeble you are when you don't have him to protect you from the big bad world.. Then he knows you'll come running back.

🌿He might even set up the incident that scares you back to him. He might put you in "danger" then come swooping in to save you. Your tommy keeping you safe.

🌿And when you do he'll open his arms to you, he'll ask you if you missed him, "You've had me worried angel, thought somet had happened to you," and he'll lull you into a false sense of security.

🌿And just when you think youve been forgiven, he'll change, he'll be calm and cold but all the love wilo have drained from his eyes... "don't you ever do that to me again y/n, you know now eh, that world out there, it'll chew you up and spit you out and it won't think twice about putting you through hell, and i won't be so forgiving next time, might not let you back in... Think about that eh... Your Tommy might not let you back in..."

🌿But when he sees the tears in your eyes, that fear, the slight tremble in your bottom lip, he changes again, cups your cheek in his hand, rubs his thumb over your skin soothing and sweet, "Come 'ere eh, s'alright now love, you're back where you belong, right here with your tommy, c'mere"

🌿Pulls you into his arms, tight hug, holds you seriously and kisses your forehead. His eyes open the whole time.

🌿"You stay here now with me yeah, be safe as houses, just you and me against the world.."

🌿And he means it, thats whats so sinister about it, he really means it. As far as hes concerned in this world theres only really one thing that matters and thats him and you, him having you...

🌿So he wouldn't think twice about killing, destroying, burning the whole fuckin city to the ground if it meant keeping you.

🌿Ultimately youre the only thing in his life which is worth living for, other than spite. Hes obsessed with the idea of keeping you healthy, of giving you everything, of making sure you live the best life and remain pure and unscathed by the world...

🌿 Which again, is why he'd sooner see the whole world destroyed before he let you go off on your own and risk being hurt.

Alfie

🐻 Just like Tommy Alfie wants to protect you. He is obsessed with your innocence and your youthful optimism, he wouldn't want any harm to come to you or for you to ever be in danger... Which is why he dotes on you, completely smothers you with his love, never leaves you alone.

🐻 And just like Tommy Alfies not surprised when you try to leave. Unlike Tommy it isn't part of some greater plan... When he first realises youre beginning to distance yourself from him he is genuinely hurt.

🐻He loves you... In his own, maybe more intense than is generally conventional but you know, thats just him ain't it, kind of way. He genuinely doesn't know what he'd do if he lost his little zieskiet...

🐻 Hes concered too, he actually does think you're as small and helpless as he's always telling you you are... He genuinely does believe that without him, you'll wither away, be dead in a week. He knows you can't look after yourself... If he lets you go thats it youre gone forever

🐻 Which is why hes so determined to keep you

🐻 He starts simple, he turns on the charm offensive, twists that dial right up to 11... He doesnt realise its making you feel worse though, all this walking you from home to the shops, the bar, meeting you outside your work...

🐻 He brings you flowers, bakes for you, buys your pretty gifts and is ever so sweet to you

🐻 But he notices what you're doing, youre still making plans... And last night one of his men told him they saw you buy a train ticket to take you up north...

🐻So he takes things up a notch... He's never let you in his office before, tells you the only people who ever come into his office are business men, cause you only leave his office on a deal or death basis

🐻So when he calls you and instructs you to come to his office you know you're in trouble, and you're terrified he knows your plan

🐻 "Alfie whats going on youre scaring me..."

🐻 "Not as much as youre scaring me poppet..." "I don't under..." "you know what i dont like poppet?... Rumours... Yeah nasty little things rumours, theyre like fuckin woodworms yeah... Theres never just fucjin one of em is there, theres always fuckin hundreds of them and theyre everywhere right... Fuckin woodworms.. You know theyre all different dont you, theyre all their own little wood munchin grimy little individual selves... But see the thing is they all look and sound thr fuckin same... Disgusting, i hate woodworms... They get into everythin don't they, the very bones of your house, and they feast on it, fuckin parasites right... And sometimes you dont even know youve got em until one night youre sleeping, dreaming fuckin lovely little dreams and suddenly, they all start dropping on you from on high... You ever had that poppet? Woodworms? "

🐻" N.. No Alfie..." "Nasty shock, fuckin horrible shock actually..."

🐻 "And thats the thing right, rumours right, theyre exactly the fuckin same and see recently yeah, I've been hearing a lot of em... Know what theyre about?" he's leaning back in his chair fingers locked over contemplative, until he turns them on you, "You..."

🐻 He tells you hes heard rumours youre going to take a train up north, he tells you all the journey details... Departure time, the stops you'll go through and the time you'll arrive at your final stop. "Amazing init, the details you hear in rumours..."

🐻Now you think you know why hes brought you to his office... The gun in his drawer, maybe he's worse than you thought he was, you try to angle yourself so that you can see his hand.

🐻 "Now what i wanna know right, is if these rumours are true?" youre trembling, utterly terrified, youre not a good liar and you know you definitely can't lie to him... But do you have a choice.

🐻 Your hesitence tells him everything he already knew.

🐻 "Now this is bad news innit, very bad news indeed poppet," "Cause see what ive been doing all these years we've been together yeah, you being mine and me being yours... Ive been looking after you, your old man - thats me yeah - 's been looking after you, plain and simple... And well, its been so long i don't know how you're gonna fair without me?"

🐻 He'll get you to stay by making you doubt yourself, he's always babied you and now hes going to remind you that you really are his little girl. That you need him to help you with everything, you won't survive without him. Who will do all the thinking for you? Make the difficult decisions? Who's going to defend you against all those bad men out there that want to hurt you?

🐻 "So these rumours right? Are they true?" this time you dont hesitate, you shake your head and say no, you dont want to leave him you want to stay with him forever...

🐻 He welcomes you into his lap, pats his knee says "well, thats alright then ain't it, come here poppet, come sit in your old mans lap yeah?" he strokes your hair and holds you and keeps talking to you about how he takes care of you.

🐻 You reach down, trying to be subtle you want to see if the gun is in his drawer, if he was going to use it on you. But he catches your little hand in his raises it to his mouth and kissing your fingers one by one whilst hes talking to you.

🐻 "Did you think that's what id brought you in here for poppet? You think your old man was gonna offer you a deal or death?" you shake your head but youre lying again and this time he questions for a second if he went too far... He did want you to think he might do that...

🐻 But he never actually would... Wouldnt every hurt you like that... Alfies toxic behaviors stem from him being possessive and too protective, he only holds on so tight to you to try and protect you from every threat he percieves. Why would he kill the thing that means the most to him.

Arthur

🍂 He knows he has problems... Well, he's aware of most of them

🍂 He knows his temper is bad. Hes convinced that he's a monster. If you start to believe you are something hard enough you'll start behaving like it. He thinks hes a monster, hes convinced hes going to lose you

🍂 Whether he actually is or not.

🍂But he doesn't realise, that believing you to be the only thing thats good in this world, is a problem too. That thinking youre the only one who can save him, that without you he's doomed to hell...

🍂 Thats what starts to worry you, how hes always telling you youre his ticket to heaven... But his temper and his jealousy, the rages he throws himself into when he thinks someone else has looked at you or flirted with you... They're the things that make you certain you have to leave.

🍂 Its only a matter of time before someone gets killed because of his complete obsession with you, so you try to leave.

🍂 You dont want to hurt him though, despite his rages, his violent outbursts you see him for what you believe him to really be. A wounded man who is hurting, a man who is capable of love but gets so overwhelmed by it it starts eating him alive like black rot.

🍂 So you try to break it to him gently. You tell him you love him but you have to go, its too much, too intense. You make the mistake of telling him he scares you

🍂 "Alright love you listen to me now... This is whats going to happen yeah... You are going to go upstairs now yeah, youre going to unpack your things, put em all back where they belong and then you're going to come back down here and youre going to apologise to me for fucking scaring me alright?"

🍂 He doesnt say it calmly either, he has that low, threatening anger, you can see how hard hes trying to hold it together but hes shaking with rage, you can see it bubbling up behind his eyes.

🍂 You try to be brave, you try to say, "no arthur, thats not how its going to be this..."

🍂 Thats when he loses it, "Alright?" he raises his voice getting louder, "I said fucking alright y/n? Did you hear me?"

🍂 He might get physical, he won't attack you, but that switch will flip in his brain, triggered by how scared he is to lose you... And you'll definitely be scared that he might really hurt you

🍂 He'll probably grab you too roughly, perhaps trap you against the wall. Hand gripping your throat tight enough to leave a mark.

🍂 If he hurts you hes going to feel bad about it, full of guilt later. He'll apologise to you, tell you it won't happen again, he'll probably tell you he knows youre scared of him, hes a monster, you and fuckin everyone else is scared of him these days...

🍂 You'll stay because he scares you. But also because you are convinced that maybe underneath it all there is good in him, you can change him...

🍂 But he won't change.

🍂 He can't change. He doesnt know why he feels everything so intensely but he does, he feels his love for you like bullets ripping through his body. He wouldn't be able to breath if he lost you. He'd suffocate

🍂 Which is ironic because sometimes hes so overzealous with his love, so possesive, always touching you in public, behaving inappropriately at parties and in front of other people. Squeezing you, rubbing your thigh, your arse... Can't keep his hands off you... That it feels like hes suffocating you with his love.

🍂 If he isnt following you everywhere personally, hes got peaky boys watching over you at all times.

John

🌼 Doesnt know that he has problems, thinks this level of adoration and love combined with this level of fear of your leaving, is normal... Its just the nature of your relationship, because he lives in such a dangerous world, its natural to fear you could be snatched from him at any moment. So he doesn't realise theres anything wrong with his attachment to you

🌼 He wont believe you, he'll probably crack a grin and say "what was that flower?" when you don't answer though, when he looks and sees the tears in your eyes he'll shout, "fuckin what was that y/n?"

🌼 He has tears in his eyes, you cant tell if hes really going to cry or not...

🌼 Hes far too invested in your relationship its like his whole life depends on it... That the second you tell him you've had enough, of his fighting and drinking, the crime, the violence, the worrying he ain't gonna make it home to you... The second you quite fairly point out that it isn't fair on you, he hits breaking point.

🌼 0 to 100.

🌼 At first he can't believe it, then hes devestated, then hes angry. And the emotions hit him at 100mph

🌼He doesnt understand why you want to go? He believes the two of you are perfect, that youre the perfect example of when opposites attract, that your good balances out his bad...

🌼 So you try to explain it to him, you can see he's upset so you try to be kind... Try to tell him theres no balance... But his emotions are all over the place and he keeps flipping between crying and heartbroken to white heat anger

🌼 "You wanna talk about fuckin balance love?"

🌼 He takes his gun out, turns it on you, then himself then back to you. "Find the balance now eh... We're on a fucking seesaw now y/n and one of us has got to go yeah, me or you?"

🌼 You have to talk him down from his rage, but its hard, you're holding back tears, trying not to show how scared you are but seeing him point the trigger at himself it makes you realise how devestated you would be to lose him

🌼 And that must mean you love him right? You always knew you did love him, never questioned your love for him... Just whether or not it was good love.

🌼 Youre not stupid, you know this isnt good love but... Its the only love youve got and you do love him...

🌼 So you talk calmly, approach him slowly, youre trembling and when you get to him theres a moment where hes still pointing the gun at you... Hes tears on his cheeks and hes shaking too.

🌼 "John love, sweetheart please don't do this i love you Im sorry i love you..."

🌼 You end up crying together on the kitchen floor, him holding onto you so tight.

🌼 He makes sure in future to be extra sweet to you, he buys you a locket with a photo of him in it, on the back "my love" is engraved. Its beautiful. He tells you to wear it everyday. Never to take it off.

🌼He will also use sex to keeo you his, making you feel good and reminding you that hes the only man who could make you feel that good.

Bonnie

🍀 Doesn't really know that hes as bad as he is... Hes just protective, some would call him possesive too but all he thinks is that hes protecting what is his.

🍀 He knows he shouldn't like the fact that youre physically much weaker than him as much as he does but he brushes it off as just something that attracts him to you... Everyone likes different things and he likes you.

🍀 If you realise he's a little too possessive, if you work out the fact that he never actually leaves you on your own, that even when you go for walks you feel like someones following you, that you see him waiting across the street from you in town, always watching you (he'd say watching over you, making sure hes there near by if you need him)

🍀 Then you might decide you want to leave.

🍀And Bonnie does have a very strong moral code, he has certain views about relationships and women that hes stubborn about.

🍀 He wont hurt you, he wont physically stop you, won't even threaten you... Because he knows that isnt how you treat women... Even when they're scaring the shit out of you threatening to break your fucking heart

🍀He'll look sad when you tell him, when you tell him he scares you when he follows you, that youre scared to be with him

🍀He apologises, tells you he does it cause he cares about you, because he loves you, hes so sweet about it, so apologetic that you know he really is sorry he scares you...

🍀 He promises you he'll change... And he tries a little, not very hard because theres some changes he doesn't think it would be very smart to use make...

🍀So in the end he doesnt change at all, he still follows you, still lingers around you all the time, watching you with those intense eyes. Its like hes waiting for something bad to happen to you...

🍀He probably uses his peaky boy status to scare other lads away from you, hes scared of losing you to someone else so whenever he sees another man near he intervenes, either by coming up to you, holding your hand, putting his arm around you, kissing you in front of them, marks his territory or, by threatening them later when youre gone.

🍀Hes always finding an excuse to give you his clothes to wear, he likes it when you wear his coat. Feels like hes keeping you safe, but also it shows everyone that youre his.

🍀 You think Bonnies sweet, that he really is only trying his best to keep you safe.

🍀When things get rough, when he thinks you're becoming distant, he'll take you off into the wildlands where the two of you can be alone together for as long as it takes to win you over.

🍀And when you do say you'll give him another chance he's ever so sweet and good to you, smothers you with affection. He does make you feel loved, even if at times it is intense and scary.

Isaiah

🐀Hes jealous and he has a temper.

🐀The temper is usually reserved for people he percieves to threaten the happiness of you and him.

🐀You're his prize to defend and hes convinced hes always going to be fighting people to keep you. Thinks everyone wants a piece of his girl

🐀When you tire of the constant convincing him youre his and only his, and you try to leave he kind of bates you?

🐀"Fucking fine y/n, fuckin leave me then.." he can pretend not to care for just long enough to make you doubt yourself, just long enough to break your heart and make you regret your decision.

🐀Thats only because thats not something that takes very long... For a number of reasons

🐀Isaiah is very good at playing the long game. When things are good he showers you with expensive gifts and spoils you sexually too, he's always giving you little reminders of how hard he works for you and the life the two of you have together. He's always reminding you that everything he does is for you.

🐀He's always leaving little marks on you two, love bites and things, marking his territory

🐀So when he switches the charm off the moment you threaten to leave it makes you question whats wrong with you, he isn't even upset, maybe you need him more than he needs you?

🐀That scares you into submission pretty quickly and when you shake your head, change your mind and begin to cry, he'll change again, tell you not to cry, not to be upset.

🐀"Don't cry sweetheart, not your fault, i know you get a little bit confused sometimes, such strong, scary emotions must muddle that pretty little head of yours right up," he's good at babying you, talking down to you to remind you that without him you couldn't survive on your own.

🐀Will start kissing you, touching you, carressing you, teasing you until he has you undressed for him, he'll drive you crazy the way only he can and when he's fucking you into submission he'll remind you that hes the only one who can make you feel that way. Hes the only one youll ever be able to feel so good with. You need him.

🐀Buys you pretty jewellery, expensive gifts, takes you out to expensive bars and spoils you, buys you things you'll never want to part with.

Michael

☘️ Is obsessed with you, with the idea of owning you. Youre the pretty thing he wants to show off to the rest of the world, he wants to see you thrive because it will make him feel good about himself. Knowing his girl is the best there is. That shes all his.

☘️Because of this he invests so much time and money into you, you get music lessons, art lessons, you get libraries of books and youre spoilt but controlled too.

☘️ Michael controls everything about your life, from what you wear to how you spend every second of every day. He wants what's best for you. Thats all hes thinking about.

☘️Is pissed that you'd want to leave, not just pissed but insulted... He knows hes possesive and controlling and he knows he cam be cold sometimes but

☘️ "Everything you've got y/n, I've given you... Everything i own i share it with you.. Everything I've worked for its for us... Together right?"

☘️ Threatens you, not with physical violence but instead threatens to take everything from you.

☘️ "if I'm going to fucking lose you y/n then youre going to lose everything?" youre everything to him so it seems fair that you should lose everything if you walk away from him

☘️He'll dazzle you with all the fancy gifts hes brought you over the years, he'll stand behind you in the mirror, let his fingers trail the silk dress he chose for you, that he paid for... He'll kiss your neck just above the string of pearls you wear doubled around your neck

☘️ And then he'll tug them, the necklace tightens around your neck... Almost... Almost enough to actually choke you

☘️ You'll lose everything y/n... Your connections, the family will cut you off... We can leave you behind, forget we ever knew your name, but you can't leave us... People will always know you as my wife... Bad men will still try to use you to get to me..." "But if youre not mine anymore i wont protect you, ill let them have you wont i... Cause you wont be part of the family anymore and i wont know you... Wont know who you are..."

☘️ These kind of threats are as scary as anything threat of physical violence could be. You know michael really means it when he says these things. He's a cold man. Capable of cutting you off.

☘️"No second chances y/n if you want to leave then leave, but there'll be no second chances..."

☘️And maybe you could be fine on your own, maybe you could start fresh, somewhere no one knows your name... But is it really worth the risk...

☘️ "Or you can stay, you can apologise to me for being so ungrateful, and then I'll forgive you and we'll go back to happily ever after.." "Just like that?". "Yes love, just like that"

Idk if i did these right sorryy bestie, i hope you liked them though!!!

#peaky blinders imagines #bonnie gold x reader #tommy shelby x reader #arthur shelby x reader #john shelby x reader #peaky blinders headcanon #look at me giving advice #peaky blinders imagine #alfie solomons x reader #peaky blinders #dark!tommy shelby x reader #Dark! Peaky blinders

[sistervirtue]

i think i hauve a crush on you can you talk about ibara more

okay um teehee ill try to say something i havent just said a million times before o7

um but!!! one thing i think is interesting about her is ofc her hairstyle and the fact the crown of thorns very clearly had to have been styled herself (given we see her without it as well and just like, the nature of her hair) and in the sheet for her hero costume it says that "if she gets cold she can just wrap herself in her thorns". which is like, curious to me in that we know her thorns have some cutting and scraping power-- she expresses being worried about people getting scratched in the light novels, we see kirishima and kaminari covered in scrapes after getting wrapped up, etc. so this to me implies one of two things: either her skin is naturally just like, too tough to feel it, or shes gotten used to it

given like, what the crown of thorns represents and ibaras whole hardcore humble nature, personally i think that instead of being predisposed to thorn immunity, shes just gotten used to the prickles over the years. thats why i like drawing her with a lot of teeny tiny blemishes and scars on her face/neck/shoulders when i draw her!

(some of these are old as fuck fojeroijtgojogj sorry)

i would really. really like to see the vine sweater though like whatever "wrapping herself in thorns" means. please horikoshi i want to see it

i also think ibaras personality is full of some really fun and interesting contradictions and sillyisms like i know ive hammered on about how a lot of the times she just kinda does her own thing, but i think its cool to note that shes not like, obscenely arrogant or reckless or whatever. we see her express uncertainty a few times; she gets stage fright before class b's play, as well as in the ova when she tells jirou that she hasnt ever played baseball before. I think with ibara, it's not that she believes shes good at everything and always correct: i think ibara knows what shes good at, and so on THOSE things she doesnt really give a lot of wiggle room, but with other things, shes a lot more willing to let other people take the lead because shes like idkkkkk idkkkkkk girl

theres also times when she does lie! i know youre gasping. scandalized. but i think its also a really interesting little bit of insight

in the light novels, theres a chapter about the girls luring mineta into revealing himself while hes trying to peep in the training camp baths so they can kick his ass, and in that chapter, kendou, yui, and ibara act as the "decoys". they fake a conversation while they fill the room with smoke with a machine yaomomo made, and then all the girls hang out after and have a slumber party. ibaras well aware of what theyre doing and why, and she doesnt express any regret or uncertainty on the matter, even though shishida using her as a decoy in combat was something she was shocked and upset by. not to mention, she also mentions having stolen minetas headband in a "deceitful way" during the sports fest, and only mentions it possibly being a bad thing when their team wakes up after being brainwashed by shinsou and is like "was that karma for doing that"

like, there's very clearly this precedent of her explicitly and exclusively thinking of deception as 100% okay against mineta, which is hilarious, because we even see her apologize to gigantomachia.

This guy is trying to kill them. He is a "walking natural disaster". and shes still apologizing to him for outnumbering him. Which is hilarious. But she never once apologizes to Mineta. Given what that kind of thing means to Ibara, I think this makes her the character to express the most outright malice and hatred towards Mineta in the entire series. And she's right for that. (I don't know why so many people seem to ship them together also like what....anyways)

the biggest thing with ibara i think is that a lot of people will write her or write her off a certain way because of her initial gimmick and so they just kinda automatically assign a personality and traits based on the very western american concept of a devout christian. which is fair, i guess, like i get it, but ibara isn't in america (shes in a country where christianity is very heavily a minority) and i think most importantly, she's still a 16 year old girl. a very weird, very super powered 16 year old girl, but the appeal of the bnha students as characters is that even with all their funny habits and quirks, they're still VERY 16, and ibara is no different. the girl may talk about flayings and the body of the lord, but she still wears little pink sneakers to gym and gets nervous performing in a school play and has to worry about her math class.

and another one of her funny contradictions ive also spoken about but the way in which she speaks i think is another interesting facet. we know ibara is a very above-board, straightforward, honorable kid who hates lying or any type of deception. she has a moral panic over basic tactical maneuvers. but the way she talks is so esoteric that a lot of her peers dont seem to really understand her, and she seems almost completely oblivious to that fact? again, take an example from the light novels: iida asks what he just ate in the hot pot penalty game, and ibara says "the body of our lord..." to which he responds "A BODY?!" and its only when Yaomomo clears up that she's talking about bread does it get clarified at all. I can only think of one or two instances when Ibara clarifies what the fuck she's talking about at any time, and that's with a very direct set of questions. Another example is Shishida and his nickname:

It's very clear that he doesn't want to be called that, but they continue nonetheless.

And I don't think any of this is at odds with Ibara's very straightforward, guileless nature. I think it's just a "translation error"-- Ibara thinks what she's saying is exactly the same as what everyone else is saying, and doesn't get that most people don't have the context or background to decode how she speaks. They're "synonyms"-- but only to her, and nobody else. It's interesting! And I think it could provide a lot of interesting play with other characters who haven't had to adapt to it yet, or even with characters who by necessity would-- like Kaminari and Sero, who do work studies with her.

anyway eeeeek i have to get ready to go to work love you bye <3

#ibara shiozaki

[s0dium]

#13 with Geto pleeease!!

Playing with his hair

Geto x reader fluff

A/n: This has to be one of the fav things ive written. It makes me upset to know that none of my fluff pieces will ever really get as much recognition as my smut works. Im not saying this is bad or im ungrateful or really anything else other then the fact that I wish my stories got more recognition. Thats all. Other wise im so happy for all the support ive been given! Thank you!

Prompt: He kissed you. Without warning, without permission. Without even deciding to do it, but simply because he couldn't have done anything else. He. needed that breath you were holding. It belongs to him, and he wanted it back.

Warnings: Pre!Cursed jujutsu tech Geto, mentions of marriage, established relationship pure fluff

Synopsis: In which you play with geto's hair

~

Silky raven strands of hair ran through your fingers like water and your silent hums of contempt filled your surroundings with a relaxed ambience.

“How's it looking back there doll?”

You bit your lip and leaned back to gaze at your work. Though the lower half remained unfinished, Getos thick hair hung loosely in a large fishtail braid that reached to the bottom of his shoulder blades. The sight of your progress made you grin and you patted yourself on your back for achieving such a feat of accomplishments. It wasn’t like your boyfriend's hair was unruly or knotty by any means, in fact Getos hair always looked like it was straight out of a pantene commercial.It's just that there was so much of it. But there was something tranquil about threading your fingers through his locks and Geto felt no different; often falling asleep while you scratched and kneaded his head with your nimble fingers

“My best work yet!” You affirmed and Geto let out a chuckle at your prideful statement.

The two of you sat in peaceful silence on the engawa of the traditional Japanese built Jujutsu school dorm, bathing in the warm sun of the spring afternoon. Next to you sat a small pile of carefully picked plum blossoms you had started to use as decorations for Getos braid. As you parted another section of hair, Geto’s hand caught yours that was behind his ear and softly kissed your skin, making you giggle.

“You know i'm not going to be able to finish my masterpiece with just one hand right?”

“Mmh I know~” Gets lazily hummed and continues to place his lips on the tips of each or your tiny fingers.

Though his back was faced toward you, you could clearly see the image of his sly smile in your head. You sighed and decided to climb over his back, landing in getos lap with a ‘oof’.

“You know you could’ve just walked around like a normal person.” Geto teased. He knew how obsessed you were with the size difference between the two of you, so scaling his body like a monkey was an often occurrence. You also always asked Geto to place his palm against yours just to see how big his hands were and your reaction never failed to entertain. In truth, Geto  was just as fascinated with the size difference as well.  You were just so small compared to him. So breakable. And all his. You’re the perfect juxtaposition against him.

“That way is more fun.” You reassured confidently, making Geto chuckle. A pair of hands came to cup your face and pull you into a warm kiss. The kiss was without warning, without permission. Without even deciding to do it because he couldn't have done anything else. He needed that breath you were holding. It belongs to him, and he wanted it back. At this point Geto didn't even have to swipe his tongue on your lower lip to ask permission, you just willingly allowed him to take your breath away, it wasn't like you needed it anyway.

"Why do you smell so good?" He mumbles, moving to leave a trail of light kisses along your jawline, under your chin. “It's driving me crazy.”

“I’ve been stealing your soaps when I come over.” You tell him and he raises an eyebrow.

“So that's why i’ve been running out so fast.” He notes and you blush. “I’ll buy more for the both of us then.”

~

After a couple minutes passed, Geto’s head was now buried in the crook of your neck while you slowly ran your fingers through his hair; disassembling the braid.

“I'm gonna have to go back soon y’know, I still have laundry to do.”

Geto simply hums in response and you continue on talking. The two of you often had moments like this, where he’d let you ramble on about life while he simply basked in your presence, listening to every word.

“I could barely sleep too, the walls are so thin and I had to listen to Haibara rambling on the phone till 12.” You lightly laugh and Geto revels in the way your body vibrates as you do so.

“Mhm is that so.” His voice came out muffled and his words blend together in a sleepy like manner.

“I didn't have the guts to tell him to turn it down. He is just so nice to me, I would’ve felt bad...”

“Mhm…..very interesting…..” You took note of the light sarcasm in Getos words and rolled your eyes.

“Hey, I'm being serious!”

“And I'm giving you my undivided attention, now what was that again?” You could feel Geto slightly grinning against your neck while his fingers sneakily went under your shirt to hold your hips and pet your skin with his thumb.

You huffed. “I was just complaining about my room, that's all.”

A warm gentle breeze passed, causing the leaves on the bushes and trees nearby to rustle against each other like maracas. There was a minute of peaceful silence of just laying in eachothers arms, before Geto spoke again. The nearby thump of a hollow bamboo water fountain against a rock breaks the serene silence.

“Why don't you move in with me now?” His voice remained calm and deep, still laced with the drowsiness that came with sleep.”You're going to be living with me at some point anyways.”

“I am? Why is that?”

“Because,”  Geto yawned, still speaking with his eyes closed in contempt. You can feel the way his nose brushes against your skin and how his warm breath dances on your skin. “I'm going to marry you.”

Your eyes widen at the statement and you run the sentence over and over again in your head, leaving you speechless.

“I-what?” You gently push Geto so the two of you are face to face and you can look in his eyes for any sign of sarcasm or playfulness. He stares right back at you and chuckles.

“Hm what’s the problem princess, you didn't think I was already thinking about stuff like this?”

“No I just….” You breathe and take him in, really take Geto Suguru in. Take in the way he looks at you, how his long black hair frames his face, the same shade as his earrings, the way the sunlight softly alights his skin in beautiful honey tones and the way his smiles at you so patiently and knowingly.

Then you find that you're smiling as well, a stupidly big smile that makes your cheeks hurt, and in that moment, you feel like you might die of happiness.

“I think that's wonderful” You tell him

"Do you?" Geto grins. "How interesting."

And you nod, over and over again.

Your fingers move to push his black bangs behind his ear and Geto closes his eyes for a second upon your touch. Similes slightly, his cheek dimpled on one side. He looks thoughtful now.

“And why are you so thrilled?” He asks, trying not to laugh. “You look like you're about to explode baby.” And you dont doubt that you could.

"I want you to be happy." You tell him without much thought. Your eyes searching his. "I want you to have a family. I want you to be surrounded by people who care about you, I want to give all that to you,” you say. “You deserve that.” You last words come out like a silent prayer. The hold both of Geto’s hands has on your hips tightens, and the way his thumbs rub on your skin sends shudders across your body.

"I have you," Geto says, resting his forehead against yours. His eyes shut.

"You should have more than me,"

"No.” he whispers. he shakes his head. His nose grazes yours. “You’ll ruin me if you love me anymore. Is that what you want? To ruin me?”

“Yes. I want to ruin you.” You hum

“Good,” He says. “I want that too.”

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #geto x reader #getou suguru x reader #getou x you #geto smut #getou x y/n #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #geto x reader smut #geto suguru #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #geto angst #geto fluff

[lostinyourparadise98]

Let You Go

a/n: I hope you all enjoy! please like and share this one is kind of long (:

“You know I will always support you but I cannot let you do this.”

I roll down the sleeves of my sweater letting the fabric swipe away the tears that pool from my eyes. Ive told myself over and over again to never let it get to this point. To never let anyone see how much I love him but its too late.

“I can't do this Brooke, its too hard.” My voice comes out as a whisper as Brooke sits beside me on the cold bathroom tile. She rests her head against the wall grabbing my hand in hers and sighing deeply.

“The wedding is tomorrow pet, you cannot just bail he is your best friend.”

Ive spent most of my life convincing myself that one day I would build up the courage to tell him the truth. That one day he would see me across the room, look into my eyes and that would be it. He would smile while walking over to me  and kiss me till the world melted away. Sometimes life doesn't work out that way. So, here I am sitting on my bathroom floor with my roommate the day before the love of my life gets married, fighting with what I want to do and with what I know I have too.

“I cant even say his name without crying Brooke ” I rest my head on her shoulder.

“Im going to be honest with you okay? This i going to be the hardest thing you will ever have to do but I promise you, when you look back you won't regret it. You can't just disappear you have to take tomorrow as an opportunity to receive closure. To, to-”

“Let him go?” I finish her sentence

“Yes lovely, its time to let him go.”

The next morning

The sun shines bright today as I stand in front of the mirror. I  run my hands along the side of my dress making sure everything is in place. The peach colored fabric runs a couple of inches above my feet. I don't normally wear backless but Brooke talked me into it. My hair is neatly curled falling just below my shoulders.

“Y/n! Gemma is here.” Brooke calls for me.

Taking one last look at myself I head downstairs following Brooke and Gammas laughter in the kitchen. My eyes land on Gemma she looks absolutely stunning she is practically glowing.

“Y/n look at you, oh my goodness you look amazing.” She pulls me in for a hug 

“You look incredible Gem.”

“Thank you sweets. Well what do you say are you ready to go?”

no no no no no no

“Yes all set!” 

“Have a good time you two. You both look beautiful ill pick you up later Y/N.” Brooke walks us to the door

We make our way to Gammas car. I have to continuously remind myself to breathe. I need to get it together.

“Hey wait.” Gemma lightly grabs my hand 

“whats up did you forget something?” I ask 

“Are you okay?” Her eyes are filled with compassion and love 

“Of course I'm okay why would you-”

“Y/n you're my brothers best friend I have known you my entire life you don't have to pretend around me.” Holy shit she knows 

“What are you talking about?” Please don't make me talk about this 

“y/n, don't play with me I see you. Its the way you look at him, hell even in the way you say his name. You love him.”

“Please Gemma I can't”

“I know my love, I know. I am so sorry y/n you have no idea how much I am hurting for you, I promise you I will be here for you okay? If you need to take a breather or something is too much for you to handle just tell me and we will get through it together.”

“You shouldn't have to do that Gem its your brothers wedding day. You should be happy celebrating him not babysitting me.”

“I love my brother more than anything on this planet but that doesn't mean I have to agree with everything he does.”

“Gem Emma is perfect for Harry. She makes him over the moon happy that is all I want for him. I guess thats what makes it worse she absolutely  lovely, not a bad bone in her body.”

“Don't get me wrong I adore Emma but its always been you two, always. trust me I'm not the only one who thinks so.”

“Who else knows?” 

“My mum, well its basically obvious to everyone but Harry. Tell you the boy is clueless.”

“He doesn't love me Gem I have to accept it.” 

“You're the strongest person I know y/n.” 

The car ride to the church is spent with Gemma filling the air with small talk. I can tell she is trying to distract me bless her soul. There is nothing on this Earth that could pull me away from this pain. I should have told him why the hell did I not take a chance. What if he felt the same way, what if-

“y/n? you ready.” 

It takes me a moment to realize that we have arrived to the church. I take a deep breathe and nod. I step out of the car and force myself to smile. This is going to be a very long night. 

We step through the doors and I am taken back by how beautiful the church is. We are one of the first people here Anne greets us right away, hugging Gemma first then making her way to me. She immediately wraps her arms around me and whispers.

“He is looking for you I can come up with something if you're not ready to see him.” I pull away 

“No, Its okay I'm ready.” Anne leads me to the back room where Harry is we both stand blankly in front of the door.

“I love you my sweet girl let know if you need anything.” 

“Thank you Anne I love you too.” She gently smiles and quietly walks away

I can feel my heart fall to my throat. My hand begins to shake as I slowly lift it and begin knocking.

“Come in.” His voice causes my heart to race my mouth goes dry I slowly turn the knob and enter. 

Harry stands in front of a tiny mirror adjusting his curly hair. He turns to face me and his face turns up into a bright smile. This is so hard 

“Hey, there you are come in.” the sun light streaming through the window causes his skin to radiate a heavenly glow. His eyes, My God those eyes I never want them to leave mine.

“Look at you, you look so handsome ” don't cry don't cry don't cry 

He walks closer to me, “Thank you petal, you know its crazy to think that you use to be taller than me.”

“Oh hush you'll shrink down by the time you're forty. You'll probably be balding by then too.”

He dramatically gasps, “Okay now you've crossed a line.” we both chuckle as he walks behind me grabbing two glasses and a bottle of champagne. He pops the Champagne open and begins pouring.

“I don’t think Ive ever been this nervous.” he hands me a glass 

“You’ll be fine you have nothing to worry about.”

“I need you to know that it means the world to me that you're here. You're my best friend and I could not imagine doing this without you.”

“Of course Harry what are friends for?” He steps closer to me 

“Can you promise me something?” His eyes poor into mine, it takes everything in me not to fall into his arms and confess everything. All I can do is nod as he continues.

“Promise me that we will be in each others lives forever. That we will spend holidays together and our kids will grow up and become best friends just like we did.” 

“I promise.” I raise my glass to his clinking it 

“Heres to forever.”

“To forever.” A forever next to a man I can never have. 

The ceremony begins, I watched Harry step up to the alter messing with his fingers as he waits for his bride. A nervous habit he has never been able to break. Theres a moment when everything goes silent my eyes are glued to Harry. His eyes are wide, his smile the brightest I have ever seen. I can't stop myself from grinning along with him. He looks so happy, Emma makes her way closer to him their eyes are focused on each other. I watch him  mouth the words ‘I love you’ and in that moment my heart shatters. 

They exchange their vows giving the rest of their lives to one another. I sat in silence counting all the times I could have confessed. Once the ceremony ends I drive with Niall and Louis to the reception. Its nice to get pulled out of reality for awhile. Louis is the best person to go to when you need a distraction. Once we reach the reception I find my name tag and take my seat. I'm able to get through dinner and make polite conversation. The Dj announces Mr and Mrs. styles are about to have their fist dance. I couldn't sit through it, I had to excuse myself.

I tried my best to be inconspicuous as I snuck through the back. The cool summer breeze kissed my skin, the sun began to set as I listened to their song in the background. I have never felt so empty. I couldn't hold back anymore I let myself unravel I let every tear Ive ever held back fall.

I didn't realize how long I was outside till the moon began to rise. I was suddenly pulled away from my thoughts when the back door opened.

“y/n? What are you doing out here I have been looking all over for you.” I can't bring myself to face him.

“y/n? petal its freezing out here.” I feel him begin to wrap his tux around me but I pull away.

“You don't have to do that I'm okay.” he stands closer to me 

“Have you been crying?” 

“I’m okay its probably just the wine you know how I get.” I try my best to keep my voice calm but the lump in my throat gets bigger and bigger 

“Hey, hey, hey look at me. You can talk to me y/n its me.”

“Harry please just go inside Ill be okay I promise just go back and enjoy your wedding.”

“I can't enjoy it knowing you’re out here by yourself crying. You haven't even danced with me yet.” I can't help but chuckle at his concern 

“Come on please petal come dance with me I have a song picked out and everything.”

“Harry I can't, Im sorry I just can't.”

“Thats okay we can dance right here.”

“Here?”

“well you won't go inside come on come here.”

He wraps his hands around my waist and I place mine on his shoulders. We slowly sway back and fourth even though the Dj is playing a fast paced song. I can't handle looking at him so I place my head on his shoulder.

“Petal I want you to know that whatever is bothering you will get better. I will be here when you are ready to talk about it. I want you to enjoy yourself tonight I can't stand to see you sad. Emma will be heartbroken if she knew you were so upset.” And with that I lost it again, I pulled away from him.

“I have to go Harry.” 

“What why?”

“I can't handle this anymore.”

“y/n please talk to me you're freaking me out.”

“Its too much I will ruin everything if I tell you.” He grabs my hands in his attempting to calm me down 

“Please just talk to me I promise you aren't going to ruin anything.”

“You are the most important person in my life Harry. You have been here for me my entire life and your friendship means the world to me. I thought I could push it away, I thought I would be able to do this but its impossible because I'm in love with you. I don't expect you to do or say anything I just needed you to know. I will leave and you won't have to worry about me intruding I promise I am so sorry for ruining everything I just-” 

He wraps his arms around me and pulls my body close to his chest. I slowly bring my arms around him, hugging him back. I hear him sniffle and realize he is crying. He pulls away for a moment and puts his forehead against mine

“I should have told you.” he whispers 

“What?” This can't be happening 

“Its always been you y/n.”

“You can't say that to me Harry this can't happen its too late.”

“I know.” Tears streaming down both of our face 

“Its best for the both of us if I disappear for awhile Harry.”

“Petal please don't you're my best friend, I love you.”

“I love you too but this is too hard I can't watch you kiss her its too painful I just need some time.”

“Please don't do this.”

“Harry I have to let you go.”

“I know that you understand that I love Emma with all my heart. She makes me so happy and for a long time I was convinced I would never have that. She is my wife and I will always honor and be loyal to her. But that will never change the fact that you will always be my first. It was you from the beginning, you will aways be in my heart fucking always. Promise me you won't let this change us please.”

“I can't promise that. I just need to go away for awhile please don't be upset with me.”

He leans down and presses his lips to my forehead.

“I could never be upset with I just can't believe we have to-”

“Let each other go.” we say in unison

He let me go. 

Hope you all enjoyed!!! sorry if none of it makes sense I never edit my work lol

#Harrystyles #harry styles #watermelon sugar #kiwi #fine line #lights up #one direction #harrystylesimagines #harry styles fanfic #harrystyles2019 #Niall horan #liam payne #louis tomlinson

[killerwhitequeen-blog]

Black Cloud (Ben Hardy!Roger Taylor x reader)

Anonymous asked: Hi! I aw that requests are open and was wondering if you could do a Roger Taylor one where the reader has amnesia and they are on a relationship and the reader doesn't remember. It can be angsty or fluffy, completely up to you!

A/N: I decided to go with both angsty and fluffy, hope you all enjoy, feel free to give criticism. Tbh this one is sad gamer hours so have fun with that

Warnings: Parent Death (brief mention), drunk driving, swearing.

The day had been off to a bad start for Roger, with Freddie making him redo his perfected drum solo a multitude of times, the skin on his snare tearing, having an argument with Brian over how convoluted his songs were and of course, not being able to see you.

You were stuck in work that day, with people you disliked and customers you detested, on your feet, for eight hours straight. Breathing out a sigh you cracked your neck, letting the vertebrae down your spine pop with it, feeling an instant release from some of works tensions.

You didn't know what would happen later but you had a sinking feeling in your chest whenever you thought about the walk home. Roger was unable to pick you up that day, busy with prior engagements, like the trip to the pub the band had been promising Fred for months. You understood completely and were actually looking forward to a nice quiet walk home before settling on the settee with a cuppa and watching mindless drivel on the TV before a good, deserved nights rest. But the storm cloud brewing in your stomach would not calm, it could not be satiated until the deed was done.

You called the boys before you left work that night, wanting to hear Rogers voice before he became mindlessly drunk, the phone picked up on the second ring.

“Yuh huh?” you heard Roger moan down the phone, obviously annoyed that he was the one to have to pick it up.

“Oh what a lovely way to greet your girlfriend Roger, really something to write home to mum about” you said sarcasm practically dripping from your voice.

“(Y/N) Fuck, I'm so glad you called, I've had the worst day imaginable... but you know what would make it better?” you could nearly hear him wiggling his eyebrows through the phone, making you giggle.

“No Roger, look, I only called to say, I'm leaving work now to try and get back home before it gets dark”

“Okay sweetheart, do you want to say hi to the guys before you go? We all miss you terribly” you laughed at his horrible attempt at a posh accent before giving your affirmation.

“SAY HI TO (Y/N)!” You heard Roger call through the studio and suddenly harsh footsteps were heard from the other end of the line.

“HI” all three boys shouted at once making the phone to your ear rattle slightly from the sheer force of the vibrations.

“Hiya boys” you paused for one second before saying “now ive really got to go Rog, I love you all and Ill see you soon, love you the most Rog, see you tonight right? No sleepovers at Brians, I dont care how drunk you get, I want to see you tonight”

“Bye (Y/N)” the lads yelled, rattling the poor landline once again.

“Bye love, I promise I'll see you later, I love you more than anything princess, bye” he mumbled so the others wouldnt hear him.

“bye” you said, putting down the handset and reaching for your bag, the sinking feeling in your gut getting worse by the minute.

You decided to take the front door out of work rather than the side, opting for visibility on the main road rather than taking the scenic route back to your flat. First mistake. You decided to look to the ground whilst walking. Second mistake. One minute you heard gravel crunching beneath your feet and in a split second you heard nothing but a blood curdling scream that you realised was ripping though your own throat. All you could see was black, the dark was so dark you could hear it, maybe even taste it but you weren't sure if that was the dark or the taste of your own blood filling your mouth.

You awoke in a sterile room, that looked like it had been scrubbed floor to ceiling so many times the plaster was ready to fall off of the foundation. You went to cough, suddenly aware of the thick tube that had been shoved down your throat, you gagged around it, throat closing up in protest to the intruder before you felt it being pulled out by the gentle hand of who you assumed to be the nurse but when you looked up you saw a man with a mop of blonde hair and striking, crystal eyes. Dressed in a simple blue linen shirt that was half buttoned and tight black trousers.

He looked at you as if you had just created the world and given it to him on a silver platter.

“You're awake! They said you wouldn't wake up for another two days at least. I missed you so bad princess” he exclaimed, grabbing your hand and just as his lips where about to graze your knuckles, you screamed. And you screamed bloody murder, it go so high to the point where you were pretty sure only dogs could hear you.

Your eyes darted around the room looking for something to throw at the man in front of you, before landing on the bed pan on your bedside table. Gripping it tightly in the hand that wasn't hooked up to any machines, you swung for the stranger in front of you. Or who you at least thought was a stranger.

“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU CREEP” you screeched, your throat sore and scratchy, whether that was from the tubing or the screaming, you were unaware, but you knew that you wanted this man far away from you, you were only 18 and this guy looked around 30, if not slightly younger, but still weird.

“(Y/N) darling what's wrong?” he looked so hurt by what you said, you almost felt bad for the guy.

“I DON'T KNOW YOU! WHY ARE YOU HERE?” you saw the sheer pain flash in his eyes before he slumped into the chair beside you, looking as if the world you had given him was burning and crumbling before his eyes.

A dazed nurse walked over to you, so you assumed it was the small hours of the morning. “What seems to be the problem Mr . Taylor?” she asked the man sat in the chair next to you and all he did was point at you before his features broke completely tears tearing down his face at an alarming rate.

“I don't know who that is” you whispered to the woman, afraid to upset the man more though you did not know why you worried, or why your heart ached for him in the way it. A sinking feeling filling your stomach like a dark storm cloud stretching throughout your insides.

“Thats your boyfriend miss (Y/L/N)” she said to you “I'll call for the doctor” she mumbles to the sad stranger.

When the doctor finally come into the room you had been sitting with the man for around fifteen minutes, him weeping into his hands, looking up at you every once in a while just for you to stare blankly into his crystalline eyes making him sob even more. The doctor checked you over, shining lights in your eyes and all other kinds of bullshit you didn't take the time to remember, you were too busy trying to memorise “Mr . Taylor's” face .

“Roger” the doctor said in order to stir the man too deep in sadness to think of much else. “She has amnesia, it should begin to pass in a few weeks but you're going to have to help jog her memory. You can take her home now, make sure to bring her in weekly for a check up on her stitches okay?”

“uh... yeah definitely, I definitely will thank you doctor Phillips.”

The doctor turned to you and started unhooking you from the machines before helping you to your feet.

“Thank you” you mutter, an unexplained guilt still filling you whilst thinking of the sad stranger.

You let 'Roger' lead you out of the hospital and into his car, Wheel in the sky by journey playing faintly through the radio and you could've sworn you had deja vu of a moment just like this from a few years ago, a man with a blurry face sat in the drivers side singing his heart out and you told him you loved him. The memory was gone as soon as it appeared and your head spun from the concentration needed just to look around the car.

By the time you were at Rogers flat, his tears had dried but he was still snuffling his nose as if in an attempt to suck the emotion back into his body. “well we're home (Y/N)”

“I don't know this place” was all you could weakly whisper in response before stepping out of the car and towards the towering block of flats in front of you.

Stepping into the cramped flat you're hit with a wave of nostalgia, making you weak in the knees, Roger holds you up by your arm pits and leads you over to the sofa in the centre of the room allowing you too fall back onto it.

“You alright love? Do you need anything? Water? Crackers? Cheese on toast? Say the word and im on it okay? Just ask”

“Tell me about “us”” you say gesturing over the 'us' with air quotes and pointing to the seat at your side.

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything Roger” that was the fist time you had said his name since the incident and just hearing it made him smile radiantly, the sun should've been ashamed to shine compared to the glowing smile of the man next to you.

“Well, I'll start with what actually happened a week ago eh?” you nodded at this suggestion.

You were walking home from work alone, I couldn't come to pick you up, and you were all alone. You were just walking on a clear patch of pavement when a driver swerved due to being drunk at the wheel. Majority of the blow hit a lamppost next to you but you also took some of the brunt, you were knocked out cold (Y/N), christ as soon as I found out I ran to the hospital to see you but they said they had to induce a temporary coma due to blood on the brain. I didn't know how long I could last without you princess, you keep me level headed and I love you for that... we all do; me, Brian, Fred, Deaky especially. I need you with me always my love you keep me sane.

“I'm so sorry I wasn't there when it happened baby, I'm so fucking sorry” you sighed and took his hand

“I might not remember you right now, but I know that what happened was not your fault and you have nothing to be sorry for” you said with a conviction which your voice had not had yet that day, you knew this man was good inside and out.

That week people came to the flat to visit you, never remembering peoples faces had a tendency to make them cry. Roger continued to tell you stories throughout the time some beginning to jog memories like the angelic car moment.

We had our first kiss the first time we met, it was at a shitty uni new years party, at least it was shitty unil I saw you. You took my breath away angel, when you spoke you had the voice of a songbird, and your body... fuck it was difficult not to just ask you for a cheeky shag to be completely honest. It reached midnight and I saw you stood alone so I took my chance and asked if I could kiss you. You had been drinking beer and I could still taste it on your tongue it was heavenly. That's when I decided I wanted to take you out, do things properly date.

Roger broke the news to you that you were in fact twenty-seven and not eighteen like you though you were. He broke the news to you that your mother had died a few years prior of breast cancer. He told you how much he loved you and slowly but surely you returning to normal, remembering small details as he told a story, even the mundane ones where you would be reading in one corner of the flat with him writing songs in the other, staring at each other every once in a while eyes just filled to the brim with love.

He reminded you of all the arguments.

All the love.

The first time you told him you loved him.

The first time he said it back, nearly six months later.

He hid nothing from you and it worked wonders.

One morning you woke on the bed with Roger not lying beside you, confused you stepped out of bed, before remembering your accident, the amnesia, the pain you put roger theough.

“Babe?” you called as you stepped through the flat towards the sofa and when Roger looked at you, he already knew you remembered, there was no slightly vacant look behind your eyes. You had returned to him, his baby had returned to him and he could hope for nothing more.

He jumped off the sofa wrapping his arms securely around you and holding you tightly, he wasn't going no lose you again not now, not ever.

“(Y/N) I was working up the courage to do this before the accident, looking for the perfect time but I've now realised there is no perfect time there is only the now and we're lucky if we get that so (Y/N) (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N) will you marry me gorgeous”

You gasped softly at the look of adoration of Rogers face as he held and you nodded, holding an onslaught of tears.

“Yes, Rog, a thousand times yes”

#ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy #joe mazello x reader #joe mazzello imagine #joe mazzello #gwilym lee x reader #gwilym lee imagine #gwilym lee #rami malek x read #rami makek imagine #rami malek #bohemian rhapsody #bohrap #roger taylor x reader #roger taylor imagines #roger taylor #john deacon x reader #john deacon imagine #john deacon #brian may x reader #brian may imagine #brian may #freddie mercury #queen #queen band #killer queen

[wintersxsoul]

Ancient Love (2)

Summary: Loki never thought he would fall in love with a mortal, but much less that he would lose you as fast as he did. But…did he really lose you?

Pairing: Loki x Female Viking!Reader

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: Dirty talking, mentions of sex and all that stuff.

A/N: Finally I get to finish this chapter. It’s been almost done for almost a week, I’m a mess ugh ily. Please, give feedback, a reblog never hurt no one and it really keeps me motivated to keep writing.

As always, Masterlist and Taglist are on my blog bio!

As weeks went by, you spent less and less time on the village and more in the woods, with the company of your foreigner friend. You were stubborn so you were struggling to admit your feelings to yourself, knowing what that could bring you. You discovered new things about the world you lived in thanks to Loki, his extent knowledge always taking you aback. He was soft and caring but something in his demeanor denoted a strong feeling of loneliness, you never asked him about it though, maybe with time he would open up to you. Loki, on the other hand, was falling for your beauty and strength of spirit, a warrior indeed. You moved around the woods like you belonged there, swaying around like leaves on the wind.

The day Loki knew he loved you was the day you were sparring with him, you achieved to pin him on the soft grass your sword threatening to cut his throat open if he moved. Your faces were mere inches apart and you could feel his hot breath on your cold lips, for a brief moment you thought it was finally going to happen but the bubble burst when you heard a loud caw coming from a crow that was sitting on a branch, staring at you.

“Let’s go, it’s getting late.” You stood up and reached out to help him get up, a shiver ran down your spine when your hands made contact for the first time, something blooming warmly in your heart.

You walked slowly through the woods admiring how the moon lit the top of the trees, the dark green shades appearing to be silver. Loki was silently admiring you, how your hair flowed with the wind and the moonlight making your skin glow. A true goddess of the woods, he thought. He would have never thought he was capable of loving someone, but there you were, making his heart ache.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You stopped dead in your tracks when you realized he had a weird expression on his face, maybe thinking that you did something to upset him. Loki’s eyes widened when you looked at him, confused and you also seemed to be scared, your eyes betraying you.

“I...uhm I think I...you have something in your hair.” He reached out to get it off your hair, a fake leaf he created to hide his true thoughts.

“Oh...okay, thank you.” You placed a strand of hair behind your ear and started walking, leaving Loki behind. He ran to you after he scolded himself, totally missing how you sighed heavily, longing for him. You were walking besides him really close, your hands brushing lightly, until you gathered the strength to intertwine your fingers with his. You heard his breath hitch but said nothing, smiling to yourself. Small victories, you thought.

Loki was hard to approach at first, you were sure he had secluded himself so deeply he forgot how to interact with someone, but as the first days went by, his actions changed, leading you to that exact moment.

Most of the nights, you slept at his hut but that night, something felt different. You could feel he was nervous and that made you aware that something you didn’t know was going on.

He stopped in front of his door and looked at you, his green eyes piercing yours. You instantly saw what was troubling him but you wanted, needed, to hear it from his own mouth.

“I’ve always thought I was incapable of bearing this kind of feelings in my chest, but you’ve set a fire inside that I’m not able to extinguish. And I do not have the will or power to do so.” He had his hand pressed on his left side of the chest, on top of his heart. Your eyes widened at his honesty and you were now able to see the love and adoration in his gaze. You placed your hand on top of his while you moved the other one to cup his cheek.

“Loki, my heart and soul are yours.” That’s all it took for him to close the space between you, his lips softly colliding against yours. Your eyes fluttered closed, your whole self melting into his arms. Loki let out a soft whimper and you moaned into his mouth, deepening the kiss, trying to pour all the love, adoration, passion and total surrender of your barriers.

Loki felt he was about to burst into flames, your breath filling his lungs with your sweet scent. He moved his hands to your waist, pulling you closer to him, your chest colliding to his, both of your hearts beating rapidly, pounding with lust. You ran your hands through his raven locks and pulled, making Loki’s breath hitch and you bit his bottom lip after tracing it with your tongue. He pulled apart trying to catch his breath and pressed his forehead against yours.

He slowly opened his eyes and watched you adoringly, both of your gazes full of desire.

“If we continue, I won’t be able to stop.” You said out of breath still right before Loki leaned in to kiss you again, this time more needy and intense.

“Then don’t.” He added, his voice low and hoarse.

-

“Do we really have to get out?” You whined at him, the coldness of the morning hitting your bare skin. Loki gave your dry lips a soft peck and got out of bed, in all his naked glory.

“We’ve been rolling on the bed for two days, Y/n. We really have to get out. We barely have food and water left.” You let out a sigh and grabbed his wrist before he could move further from the bed.

“I can think of a few very nutritional meals.” He looked at you amused by your insatiable thirst, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted by your offer, after all, he had the stamina of a god.

“Ástin mín (my love), just stay in bed and I’ll go find us something to eat.” You pouted but nodded, pulling the furs up to cover your body, watching him get dressed.

“Óst min, kyss mik (my love, kiss me.)” You tried to sound demanding but your voice trembled in anticipation, your lips longing for his, your body already missing his heat. He leaned in and pressed a kiss on top of your head, his hand cupping your cheek.

“I’ll be back before dawn, warm the bed for me.” You smiled at him lovingly and snuggled up in the bed, smelling Loki’s scent in the huge blanket.

Loki knew it would take him a few hours to hunt a big prey, so he started collecting fruits to eat and flowers to give you, knowing he could later find some meat on the village.

After a few hours he went back to the hut, some fresh stolen meat, a basket full of wild berries and daisies. He tried not to startle you so he opened the door slowly his heart swelling at the view in front of his eyes. You were sprawled on the bed, back facing the ceiling and arms tucked under the pillow, your breath blowing a few strands of hair back and forth from your face. He casted a fire, the woods from the fireplace lighting immediately and he also lit the candles, since it was already dark outside.

He approached the bed and sat besides you, leaning forward and trailing kisses up and down your naked back. You moaned half asleep and turned around, your eyes glancing at Loki half-lidded due to your sleepy state. You sat down and pressed your forehead to his chest, your hair covering your face. Loki hugged you and stroke your hair, rocking both of your bodies slowly.

“Are you okay?” You nodded, face still buried in his chest. You finally moved to look at him and smiled, reaching out to kiss him on the throat, a small and sweet peck.

“I’m starving. Can we please eat and then get back to bed?” He nodded smiling at your petition, standing up to cook the meat and prepare some herbal tea.

Months had passed since the first night you spent together, both of your new lives already established. You moved to Loki’s house since it was way bigger than yours, the spot where it was marvelous. You bought a few chickens, a cow and two horses, so you would always have food, milk and a way of transport. You never knew where Loki had gained all that money and when you asked, he always said it was from his father’s fortune.

You woke up one morning to an empty bed, thinking that maybe your lover went to gather some fruits or flowers as he usually did and as the morning went by, you tried to ignore the burning feeling that was settled on your chest, the feeling that something bad was going to happen. You were preparing some herbal tea when rain started to fall heavily on the roof of the hut, frowning, you went outside to check if it was really raining. It was very rare that it rained at this time of year, maybe the gods listened to someone’s prayers like they did with yours, it was the only logical explanation, for you at least. Loki on the other hand hurried through the woods to get to you knowing that you weren’t safe.

Just when the wooden house was in his field vision, he heard a scream, your scream, and it wasn’t coming from the house, so he ran, he ran so fast he thought his lungs were bleeding and oh god, how much he wanted that to be true because it wouldn’t be as painful as seeing what was in front of him.

#loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki x you #loki laufeyson #loki (marvel) #loki x female reader #loki x y/n #loki x yn #loki x viking reader #loki god of mischief #loki god of lies #loki gif #loki of asgard #Loki Odinson #loki of jotunheim #loki friggason #loki fandom #loki angst #loki au #loki fluff #angst and fluff #viking reader #viking era #viking au #post avengers #avenger loki #avenger reader #marvel fanfiction #ancient love

[valhallamercury]

bassist | boh rhap!john deacon x female!reader

Summary: Ever since you’ve met John, you’ve happily thrown yourself down the rabbit hole of falling in love with him. And honestly, how could you resist? He was kind, sweet, and not to mention handsome. Now the only problem: getting to go on a date with  A/N: The requested part two of secretary, so make sure you read that before reading this! This was so much fun to write, tell me if you’d guys would like a part three! :) Warnings: none, except that this is unedited.  Tag list: @lizgarxo @josephhmazzello @tv-saved-the-teenage-girl Word count: 1,994

After your first encounter with the dark-haired man, you had practically thrown yourself into a pit labeled “in love with John Richard Deacon.” Could anyone blame you though? Every time John came in with his friends to record their album, he always made sure to stop by and talk to you. He would tell you about the album and the boys, and you would tell him about how work was going and your pride and joy, which was your cat named Fleur. On bad days, he would make you smile. On some days, he brought you flowers, on others he brought you tea with compliments written on the cup. You dreamed of the day John would ask you out, and each day you would be let down when he didn’t. But you wouldn’t give up.

You sat at the front desk, organizing papers for Mr. Foster that needed to be done before noon. You checked the clock again. 10:34. You’ve got this, Y/N, why are you even worrying about it? You know you’ll have these done in 10 minutes, You thought to yourself. You knew the real reason behind your stress, though you wouldn’t admit it. You hadn’t seen John’s sunshine face in three days, making you worry that you had said something to upset him. A tap tap tap against your desk made your thoughts end. 

You looked up, seeing a familiar smiling face. You’re little sunshine was back. 

“John!” You exclaimed happily, his fond smile becoming contagious against your lips. “I haven’t seen you in a while, I was starting to worry something had happened.” You admitted, resting your head against the palm of your hand. Y/N, your papers, a voice in the back of your head nagged. You decided to ignore it. 

“No, no, I’m perfectly fine. Really. We’ve just been so busy with the album, haven’t had much time to chat.” He explained shyly, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. 

“Well, I’m glad to see your pretty face again. I’ve missed our little talks.” You smiled fondly at John, seeing his face light up to a bright pink color. It was a fun little game you liked to play: see how many times you could get John to blush. It definitely wasn’t one-sided though, for there were many occasions where Mr. Deacon had made your face go hot. 

“I’ve missed them too.” John returned your smile, leaning his elbows against your desk as he conversed with you. You could tell something was off though; he looked as though he was trying to tell you something, but just couldn’t find the words. Finally, he spoke again. 

“Hey, Y/N, I was wondering, what time do you get off?”

Your heart skipped a beat. Was this finally your moment?

“I’m actually off tomorrow.” You replied, trying to remain ‘nonchalant sounding’ but you could tell that it hadn’t been too convincing. 

“Well, what a coincidence! The boys and I have a day off tomorrow as well from pumping out songs for the album,” His signature dorky smile and pink cheeks returned, “I was wondering... well, I was wondering since we’re both conveniently off, if maybe you’d like to hang out tomorrow. Like, well, a date.” 

It took all the strength in you not to jump up and down in excitement in that very moment. But, you controlled yourself. That didn’t stop the big smile stretching across your face though.

“I would love to go on a date with you tomorrow, Deaky.” You cooed. He grinned, a soft chuckle escaping through his lips. 

“Great! Great.” He coughed, trying to calm his enthusiasm. “There’s this great tea shop I know that we can meet at,” He began, pulling a sticky note from your desk and writing down the address of the shop. He handed it to you, a bright smile across his features. You happily took the sticky note, folding it up and putting it in your jacket pocket. 

“I’ll meet you there around 10-ish?” You asked, practically bubbling over with excitement. He nodded quickly, checking the time on his watch.

“I must be going, but I guess, I guess I’ll see you around?” He guessed giddily, slowly backing up as he walked backwards down the hall. You nodded, giving him a small wave. 

“See you tomorrow, Deaks.” 

He grinned, turning around completely as he ran down the hall. You watched him run, seeing him pump his fist up in delight. You saw his three friends come out from behind some furniture of the main lobby, congratulating him. You giggled behind your hand before looking back down at your paperwork once more. 

☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆

Tap, tap, tap, tap

You blended your base in with your fingers, making sure everything was smooth and even across your face. Even in the most stressful of times, doing makeup had always calmed your nerves. However, you couldn’t stop the butterflies fluttering across your stomach or the way your face would heat up at the thought of John and the date that was in less than an hour.

You tapped a soft powder across your face, setting the base. You smudged a shimmery eyeshadow across the lids of your eyes, brushed mascara through your top and bottom lashes, and ran a clear mascara through your brows to hold them down. You applied a thick clear gloss across your lips, swiping some off your skin when you went a bit over the lines. 

Now the only problem you were faced with: what to wear. Everything you tried on just seemed to either be too much or not enough. You finally decided on denim overalls that were embroidered with elegant pink flowers, a long-sleeved pink and red striped shirt, and red Chuck Taylor All Stars.

“How do I look?” You turned, looking at your cat Fleur, who laid sprawled out across the bed. She lifted her head up, letting out a soft meow, before laying back down. You took that as a sign of approval. 

You only had fifteen minutes or so to get to the tea shop, so you decided to head out early. 

You made your way through the bustling streets of Britain, before finally stopping in front of the quaint little shop. With five minutes to spare, might you add. 

You looked around before spotting John’s familiar long locks. The man had his head in a book, tapping his finger along to the beat of some song as he read. You smiled a bit to yourself, shaking his head. You walked over, standing in front of his booth. 

“Is this seat taken?” You asked playfully. John looked up at you, a fond look appearing across his face. 

“It’s all yours.” He joked back, making you giggle. You sat down across from him, crossing your ankles out of habit. Your Gran had made sure that you always remembered to cross your ankles, not your legs. That was the proper way to do it, you could practically hear her remark. 

“This place is lovely, the scenery is so quaint and cute.” You remarked, smiling as you looked around. The shop was decorated like some sort of Woodstock-esque design. There were posters of the Beatles, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and many more artists. It had flowers of all sorts of varieties hanging from pots and vases across the store, giving it a lovely dash of color in all the right places. The room smelled of different variations of tea, all of which smelled exceptional. 

“Well, I remembered you telling me so much about how much you loved tea and flowers, so I thought this might be a good place to go.” He said softly, looking back at you shyly through his lashes. You felt your face heat up. No one you had ever been with had been this considerate. 

“You’re sweet, Johnny.” You smiled, resting your hand on your chin as you looked at the flower vase in front of you. “They really should switch the dandelions with those pink asters. The pink would compliment the goldenrods better.” You said, looking at the flowers in front of you. John raised his brows, but his smile never leaving.

“You really know your stuff, huh?”

You looked down at your feet for a moment, letting out a chuckle. “I guess you could say that. I’ve been wanting to be a florist since I was young because my Gran was a florist. She taught me all about different flowers and the way things would compliment each other and all sorts of things. My parents didn’t really think I should become a florist, they said there was no money in it and that people don’t buy flowers anymore.” You shrugged, looking back up at the dark-haired man who had been listening intently. “Besides, if I had been a florist, I would’ve never met you.” 

He smiled at you warmly, glancing at the vase. “Well, I think you should go for it. There’s no shame in trying.” He appealed, looking at you with his soft brown eyes that made you melt. “You’d be perfect at it. You have a cat named Fleur, for God’s sake.” He teased, a playful grin tugging at his lips. You giggled, rolling your eyes playfully and gently tapping his foot with your own. 

“Do not make fun of my cat, Deacon.” You scolded jokingly, a laugh escaping from the two of you. Once the laughter settled down, it was your turn to listen intently. “Well, since you know everything about me, why don’t you tell me things about you?” You asked, arching one of your brows. 

He raised a brow in return, his chin resting on the palm of his hand. “Well, what would you like to know?” 

You tapped your chin, thinking for a moment. “Favorite color? Favorite music artist? Hell, you haven’t even told me what instrument you play in your band.” 

“Well, my favorite color is black. Favorite musical artist? Probably Hendrix or the Beatles. And I play bass.” He spoke softly, looking into your eyes as he spoke. 

“That’s all?” You said as you looked at him, gently tapping his foot with your own. “C’mon, Deaks, there’s gotta be more to you than long hair and a pretty face.” 

His cheeks turned pink, tapping your foot with his in return. “Pretty face, huh?” He blushed, your feet now in an all right war with each other. “I was born August 19th,  1951. I have a band with my best mates, Freddie, Brian, and Roger. I like electronics. I love soul and funk music. I love to tinker. Doesn’t really matter with what, but I’m always fiddling with something around the studio. I also know that I’m on a date with the girl of my dreams and talking to her makes me nervous and giddy at the same time.” 

You felt your face heat up, you knew immediately you were giving the man heart-eyes. “You truly are wonderful, Deaky.” You smiled, reaching over and timidly placing your hand over his. He smiled, interlocking your fingers as he returned your fond gaze. 

You turned to face the window, seeing the rain pour down against the window. You took a deep breath, turning back to John with a sad gaze. “I should be going soon, before the rain gets any worse.” 

John frowned, glancing outside. “I’m not letting you walk home in the storm. It’s too awful.” He began, glancing down at your interlocked hands, before looking at you once more. His cheeks had turned an even deeper shade of pink. “My place isn’t far, if you’d like to stay there for the night. Only if you’d like though. Otherwise I could surely walk you home.” He added quickly, looking down at your hands. 

You smiled a bit at him, reaching over with your free hand and grabbing his other. He looked up at you, and you gave him a loving look. “What are we waiting for, Deaks? Let’s go.” 

#john deacon x reader #John Deacon #john deacon imagine #boh rhap!john deacon #joe mazzello #joe mazzello x reader #Queen #queen band #queen imagines #queen band imagine #bohemian rhapsody #boh rhap #roger taylor x reader #brian may x reader #freddie mercury x reader

[dont-leav-eme]

Hi. Can you do a fic where Tin have this unrequited feelings for Can aka his best friend and Can gets in a relationship but then something happens for him to realise that he actually loves Tin. I hope it was not a jumbled mess? 😂

Okay you got it!!TinCan Fitlet for compassedship69!(Btw this will be a high school AU where Can became Tins best friend instead of Pete)

Tin had a problem.It wasn't a problem that could be fix with Tins hefty wallet or a problem that was just a  phone call away to men in tight black suits, who spent their days sorting out 'problems' in Tins life. No, this was a problem of the heart, not the wallet or the mind. Tin liked someone. and thats a problem. Liking someone was never part of his plan. He planned to sail through high school, with a tight iron fence up against his inner feelings.Only to focus on work. He knew most relationships where on a timer, for who could give what the other wanted. But this relationship. No friendship. (He internally cringed at the word) was a bit different. Can. Can was different to anyone Tin had ever met. He was an idiot. He was also loud. Talks with his mouthful.Small but very strong. There friendship had suprised everyone in the school. They hated each other when they first met, Can told Tin he was a snob,Tin told Can he was dirty. But after a forced meeting by the school staff, the two weirdly became friends. They had weird similatires. Both talked to themselves. Both liked the same phone games.Both prefered to watch movies with subtitles. And both had never had laughed as much as when they were with each other. So it was a friendship. A happy kind friendship. It was all good. Great even.Until Tins problem was love.Falling in love in fact. Some would call it dramatic, it was a just a crush. A stupid crush. Tin realised he had this stupid crush when he was with Can, and how much he wanted to kiss him.To see if he really tasted like sweets. He hated seeing Can with other guys, he knew that Can was much more social then him. But it still hurt to see Cans light up when on of the football team members told a joke. He knew Can could never see him like that. The boy had never talked about his sexuality, he often said boys and girls where pretty, but Tin had a feeling he was straight. Tin himself had never really cared about sexuality. He just knew he could see both sexually, but that requited love was a trick. So Tin buried his problem. Put his problem in a box. A Louis Vuitton box to be clear. Tin knew that his feelings should be turned out like a lamp, but he was like a moth to Cans firey flame. Until everything changed.

'AI TIN, GUESS WHOS GOT A DATE!' Can came crushing in to the library, his hair messy. His grin wide, it nearly split his 'cute' face in half. 'A date?' Tin questioned. 'Ai Tin, Peace asked me out!!' He flug himself in to the chair on the oppoisite side. Ask?Him?Out?Tin felt a monster inside his belly. He should of known this would have happened. But he didn't realise it would be this soon. Peace would make a good match for him, she was a nice girl with a loud laugh. Perfect for Can. She would make him so happy that his eyes would shine. And Tin would watch, as she would kiss him.and he would tell her that he loved her. And would wrap his body against her at night. 'Hey, Ai Tin, didn't you hear me?' Can asked turning his head to the side cutely. 'Yeah; thats great, Can' He could feel his voice turn pretty high pitched. 'Ai Tin are you-'Im fine Can!, I have some work to do!'He left the smaller boy to pounded what made his friend so upset.                                                         .....

Tin and Cans intereaction were a little awkward since that day. Can went on his date, but when he told his best friend, he didn't want to know.Why was Tin doing this?Why didn't he care about his friend anymore?Can line Tin at one point. 'Ai Tin; did I do something wrong?'It took Tin an hour to respond, with usual blunt methods'Im fine.''Can I come over?''Fine.'Can sat with Tin on the sofa, the two were still frosty and there was a strange feeling in the air. They were both trying to get in to the movie they were watching. But both weren't concertraiting on it. Things took a turn for the weird when the screen started to show the main couple kissing. Can looked at the floor. 'Ive never done that.'

Tin snapped his neck up, looking at Cans soft eyes, his soft skin and his soft lips-

'Ive never kissed anyone before' 

'I thought you would have kissed on your date' 

'Oh so you want to talk about it now, Ai Tin I thought you didn't care!' 

Can eyes were firey, this had been weighting on his mind for quiet a while. 'I didn't kiss her!, we had fun! you would have known if you paid attention to me!'Tin knew Cans anger very well, he'd seen a million times. But he'd never seen Can like this, a painful anger, his eyes showed off pin pricks of pain. 'if you had so much fun why don't you be with her instead of me.' Tin replied, he tried but he couldn't keep the jelosey out his voice. 'Shes busy today!''So I'm a replacement then.''AI TIN I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT, GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU SEEM SO UPSET SINCE THAT DATE, DON'T YOU WANT ME TO BE HAPPY!''only with me.' Tin confessed. The two feel silent after that, looking at each other. Tin looked at Cans eyes, getting closer. 'I want you to be happy, but I wanted to be the one that took you on datesI wanted to be the one who made you blush, I want...to be your boyfriend.' 'Oh Ai Tin...' Can said a hint of sadness in his voice. Tin wanted to hide, he felt like a small boy, too frightened, too open hearted. ' Thats why Ive been moody, thats why I can't stand it when you talk about herthats why I can't even look at you without thinking about kissing you... ' His brain was on autopilot, confessing his feelings like this. It was stupid. But he couldn't stop himself. 'I like you so much.. and I know and understand that you could never-never like me, but ..you need to know' Tin felt a tear run down his face. He knew Can would leave at this point. 'Ai Tin...' His voice was so soft, it was making Tin weaker. 'Ai Tin, I'm not.., Ive never..., I'm... you like me?' 'Yes, more then anything.' He should leave, Can should walk out this front door and never look back. 'Could you, um, kiss me then?' Can's usual loud tone was replaced with a begging one. 'What?' Tin said his voice barely a whisper. 'Kiss me, thats what you are meant to do if you like someone right, to kiss them, like in that movie''Why do you want-'Can moved over slightly to kiss Tin on the mouth, it was short, very short. Only a peck. Tin smiled a little. Can was always so cute. He went staright to Cans lips and kissed him hard. It was a longer kiss. Two very different mouths meeting together, on with more force but the same tempo. They both let go off everything, Tins cold aura, Cans rapid speed. They feelings where locked together now.They let their lips natural part. And Tin looked at Can, he felt all his walls fall, he felt his heart beat more then anything. 'Ai Tin, I like you too. I like Peace but as a friend, I realised that. But I thought you'd never like me, because you seemed so angry with me..I didn't understand it, I thought you were being mean...' Tin cut off the smaller boy with his own lips again. He could get use to this. He was still scared, but he knew that Can and him could work this out. They were best friends after all, no, boyfriends.

[takingcourage]

The Start of Forever - Part 5

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Pairing: Drake x MC

Word Count: 2,387

Series Summary: The wedding has passed and the Duke and Duchess of Valtoria are free to begin their lives together away from the constraints of court. While honeymooning in Texas, they’re confronted with questions from their past that raise implications about their future. (Slight AU)

Chapter Summary: Drake and Jena spend some time alone after a difficult conversation with his mother. 

Author’s Note: Whew! Apologies for the unexpected hiatus on this story. Now that I have some free time again, I should be able to finish posting this story. I appreciate your patience through the long delay!

Tagging: @andy-loves-corgis, @carabeth, @speedyoperarascalparty

All things considered, Karen Walker had been rather more understanding than she’d expected. As Jena loaded her cereal bowl into the dishwasher, she thought back over the painstaking conversation that had ended less than an hour before.

Drake had not underestimated the effect that their news would have on his mother. On learning that her son had been given a duchy, color had drained slowly from the older woman’s face until a dull white shell was all that remained. In spite of her polite responses, the visceral reactions had been painful for all three of them.

Shortly after their previous discussion had finished, Karen had pulled Drake aside for a private word. After what she'd seen over the past eighteen hours, Jena could only hope that the woman was doing him no further damage.

She tried to convince herself that she’d done nothing but hurry along the inevitable, but guilt assailed her all the same. This certainly wasn’t the way she’d envisioned this day going. At this point, so much of their morning had been consumed by unpleasant conversation that she wondered if Drake would want to leave early for their night back in Dallas. She glanced a the stovetop clock, trying not to get her hopes up.

The quiet intonations from down the hall were at least somewhat reassuring. There had been no yelling -- of that was certain. If she was venturing to guess, she didn’t think she’d heard anything that sounded like crying either. Both seemed like signs in favor of productive conversation between mother and son.

Jena found a rag draped across the head of the faucet, dampened it, and set about clearing crumbs from the table. As she finished the final swipe across the width, she sensed a presence coming toward her.

“You don’t have to do that, Wittman.” The soft-spoken words startled out of her thoughts, despite her intuition.

“I know. But I needed something to do.” She cupped her hand underneath the cloth and shook the contents into a nearby trash can. “You doing okay?” Having rinsed the rag, she returned it to its former spot and rubbed her hands down the front of her jeans.

“Fine.” His brown eyes were trained on her, and she raised a quizzical brow as he opened and shut his mouth. Eventually, the words ventured forth. “Would you be interested in going riding? I was hoping to get the chance to show you around the ranch…”

“I’d like that a lot, actually,” she assured, still taking in his appearance.

Drake looked tired. It was evident in the exaggerated slackness of the skin around his eyes. A pang of guilt plagued her as she contrasted this with their time at the cabin. He’d been so peaceful there. After all of the stress she’d seen on that face in the past months, it sickened her to think that she’d been the cause of more.

“Good. We may as well get over to the stables. Have you ever actually saddled a horse, Wittman?” He raised his brow in challenge.

“No, but I think I’m about to learn how.” 

“Just as long as you don’t go scaring the horses. I don’t want to have to reenact that rescue from the derby.”

Jena scoffed at the slight, shaking her head in disbelief as she followed him out the front door. “You know that’s not how it happened, Walker.”

“Of course not,” he acquiesced, treating her to a half smile. She rolled her eyes and fell into step at his side, slipping her fingers into his. 

Jena had only ridden horses a few times during childhood, but she’d adjusted to the practice fairly quickly after coming to Cordonia. When she wasn’t taking day-long treks for foxhunting, she found that she actually enjoyed it very much -- especially when she was fortunate enough to have her husband’s company.

Riding around his family’s property spawned memories of exploring Valtoria with him on horseback, and she felt a pang of longing for their home. There was so much waiting for them when they returned. As much as she had enjoyed the honeymoon, some part of her was giddy at the thought of starting real life together.

Today, however, she was focused on Drake’s wellbeing. Other than the extremely thorough instructions as he’d guided her through the process of saddling the horses, he’d been fairly quiet since coming to find her in the kitchen. Jena's mind overflowed with words that could fill the silence, but nothing felt right. She breathed a grateful sigh when he chose to speak instead.

“I was pretty upset with you this morning, Wittman. I was sitting there drinking coffee and thinking that you were being unreasonable -- that you’d judged my mom too harshly. I’m not so sure anymore.”

The uncertainty in his voice halted her instinctive response. Jena breathed out slowly through her nose, biding her time in case there was more he wanted to say.

“I’ve never felt so angry with her before. She can doubt me all she wants, but doubting you -- I never thought she’d go that far. That’s a line she shouldn’t have crossed. I feel like I don’t even know her anymore...”

“For the record, I didn’t want to be right,” Jena admitted softly, grateful that they kept their horses at a relaxed pace so that she could meet his gaze. Her heart clenched at the distance in his deep brown eyes. “I just know what it’s like to defend someone who doesn’t deserve it. Finding out they’re not who you thought they were...it’s a hard pill to swallow.” She fiddled with the leather reins between her fingers, hoping that she was treading lightly enough to cause no offense.

“Your dad?” he asked simply.

Nodding, she met his eyes. The distant look gave way to a tenderness that mirrored her own worry for him, and she was struck by just how broken both of their families had been. “I wasted a lot of years making excuses for him, Drake. When I finally forgave him, it wasn’t because he’d done anything to deserve it. I just needed closure.” Drake stretched out a hand and she took it gratefully before continuing. “I don’t want you to have to go through all of that with your mom. I hope you’re able to figure things out and find a way to start over, but please don’t beat yourself up about it if you’re not.”

Her husband sighed, taking his time to respond as he turned his gaze to the horizon. “I sort of have to. I mean, dad’s not around any more. She doesn’t exactly have anyone else.”

Jena shook her head in an attempt to clear the conflicting emotions. She’d realized long ago that his protective instinct would have a propensity for getting them in trouble. She just hadn’t expected the trouble to take this form. “You always want to defend the people you care about, Drake. It’s one of the first things I noticed about you -- one of the things I love most about you too. But sometimes you have to think about protecting yourself. Sometimes that may even mean letting others protect you.”

“I don’t like to have people worrying about me.”

“We’ve been over this before…”

“I know. And sometimes having you around to worry about me is a good thing. I wouldn’t have come clean with my mom if it hadn’t been for you.”

“I hope it was the right decision.” She’d spent the past several hours second guessing her encouragement from the night before. “Did things...go okay?”

“Heh.”

She waited several moments, but he elaborated no further. “What’s that supposed to mean?” she ventured finally.

“Just that I think it’s going to take some time for her to adjust to the idea that I’m a noble and that I’m staying in Cordonia for good. But I think some part of her is proud too. Maybe someday she’ll come around to the idea that I’m not just wasting my life over there.”

“Does she really think that?” The words felt strangled as Jena worked them out of her throat. So many of her early interactions with Drake became clearer as she considered Karen’s likely influence.

He clicked his tongue to encourage the horse, but her question remained unanswered. Several paces later, he came to a sudden stop. Jena pulled the reins gently and dismounted to stand beside him in the tall grass.

“We’ll let the horses graze for a bit.”

She stroked the mare’s bony cheek and dropped the reins, putting her hands in her pockets instead. Squinting against the mid-morning sun, she followed Drake to a line of fencing nearby. Green stretched before them on every side, the light wind stirring long blades of grass into mesmerizing waves. She wondered vaguely if this was the sight that had enticed Karen to come back from Cordonia. Out here, in the warmth of late spring, it wasn’t hard to imagine the appeal that this land must have held.

Drake leaned against the nearest post, a wrinkle forming between his brows. With ease, Jena mounted the fence beside him, steadying herself with a certain hand.

Did I cross a line? Why hasn’t he answered my question? Jena hated the thought that her carelessness might have caused such distress. A week ago, she wouldn’t have been so bothered by the thought. Now, as this man’s wife, she felt some measure of responsibility to read his mind. The notion was ridiculous, but present nonetheless. Just as she was clearing her throat, he spoke.

“I’m not sure what my mother thinks anymore. She didn’t take it very well when I moved back to Cordonia. Wanted me to forge my own path instead of running back to the palace.”

“Do you ever regret it?”

“Going back?” At her nod, he continued. “I had a lot of questions at the time, but in a way, mom’s right. I’d been following Liam around for so long that it was easier to just settle back into that when I came back from the States. It took me a while to find where I belonged in all of it.  But no, I don’t regret it. Cordonia is home.”

“You’ve found your way now. And with or without the courtly graces, you’re still Drake Walker,” she beamed encouragingly. “I just wish your mom had taken the chance to get to who that man is.” A fresh sting of remorse accompanied the words, and she looped her fingers around the hand that rested beside her on the fence.

Drake interlocked his fingers with her own and lifted his face tentatively. “I think I’d like for her to get the chance to.”

Her pulse quickened at the meaning that underpinned his words. Biting her tongue, she shifted her weight toward him and took in his pensive expression.

“I don’t want to do anything you’re not comfortable with.” He hiked a hand through his hair. “But I’m not sure I’d ever forgive myself if I cut the relationship off completely. I’d always wonder if things could have been different. I’m not saying that I want to come out here for Christmases or anything, but--” preoccupied, he ceased speaking as she squeezed his hand. 

“I’ll support whatever you choose, Drake. I can’t say I have a very good first impression of her, but I respect how much she means to you. If I had any hope of my dad changing for the better, I’d probably make the same choice.” Her tone grew wistful at the impossible notion. “But I think we’re going to have to find a compromise. I don’t want you bending over backward to make her a part of our lives if she won’t even meet you halfway. You can’t do that to yourself, Drake.”

“Agreed.”

“So she’s going to have to understand that there are boundaries she can’t cross. It’s going to take some time for us to establish trust again.”

“Sounds fair to me,” he considered, stroking her knuckles with his thumb as he looked to her face. “She’s been through a lot, Jena. I don’t want to put her through more than she deserves.”

“I know,” she responded quickly to the flash of pain in his eyes. “But if she puts you through more than you deserve, she’ll have me to contend with.” Although her tone was light, they both knew that the threat was genuine.

He hoisted himself onto the fence beside her, dropping his hands to his sides. “I never thought I’d be so happy to get back to Valtoria, but I’m really looking forward to it.”

She offered a wry smile. “I am too. I know we’re going to try to work things out here, but I can’t wait to get back to Dallas and then home.”

“It’s the last night of our trip, Wittman. How do you want to spend it?”

“Seeing as it’s the last night of our honeymoon,” she emphasized, “I was thinking room service, hot tub, and…some drinks.”

“Now that’s a plan I can get behind.”

“I’m not going overboard though. We’ve got a day full of traveling tomorrow.”

“We’ll sleep it off on the plane.”

“Maybe you will," she joked, hopping down from the fence. “I’ll be awake for it all.”

“Even if I keep you up all night?”

Jena threw him a look over her shoulder. "That didn’t exactly work for the trip out here." He extended a hand toward her and she settled into the space between his legs, running her palms against toned thighs that were stretched taut from his heels pressing into the lower rail.

"I’ll take that as a challenge.” The glint in his eyes sent tendrils of heat through her core.

“Just keeping you on your toes, Walker.” 

Drake shook his head at her accompanying wink. 

“Ready when you are,” she announced, rising to the tips of her toes. Drake cradled her cheek in his hand and leaned into the kiss. His lips were soft and warm, heated by the morning sun. She snaked her arms around his waist and melted into him with pleasure. When she finally pulled away, it took several moments for her head to clear.

The kiss told her all she needed to know. They would make it through this.  Together. 

#playchoices #playchoices fanfiction #the royal romance #trr #drake walker #drake x mc

[kpurereactions]

Could you do a got7 reaction like the BTS reaction of you refusing sex?

Of course, Lets start with a little back story.

There was something comforting about going rehearsals with him, a sense of comfort in knowing that those he works with know you exist and that you belong to him, just like he belongs to you. But this was the first time he had asked you to go with him to a live show to watch. Usually, he liked to keep his business life and personal life as far away from one another as possible, not because he was ashamed, but just because he wanted to save you from all the pressure media put on idols who are dating.

You were so excited to go with him, and he was so excited to have you there, to show you exactly what its like for him. You spent all morning stuck to one another, his hand never leaving its secure place on your hip. Even when the other members excitedly bounced over to say hello and give you a sweet hug he was still there, making sure to pull you back. The two of you would laugh as he was put into wardrobe for the show, nd he would blush when you told him how good he looked. There was even a moment where he when he walked over to you, half way through going over what would be done and talked about during the show, just to plant a deep kiss on your lips because ‘you just look so cute.’

You sat by him during hair and make up, you knew these girls didnt like you. You were honestly expecting them not to. The thought of them with their hands all over the hair your tug at when hes pleasuring you and the lips you kiss when your feeling down sent a wave of jealousy through your stomach. It didnt matter though, you knew that, for the entire time he sat there his hand was on your knee, and his eye kept opening so he could look at you.

It was when he was getting the final touches on his make up done that your silly jealousy took a pang. The make up girl told him to look at her, which fine, she needs to make sure everything is even. But when she tilted his chin up with the tip of her pinky and blushed you wouldn’t help the feeling in your stomach.

‘Ive always thought you have the prettiest smile.’ She said stroking a brush along his bottom lip gently, making him smile.

‘Good, I always thought I was the best looking one out of this group.’ He joked. You would have laughed, but his hand left your knee and folded with his own in his lap. The artist looked at you, a smug look in her eyes that made the back of your neck tingle.

‘That feels really good.’ His voice brought you back to look at him. His comment was far from appropriate so why he decided to say it floored you.

‘Of course it does! I know how much you like this part.’ She said making him smile again.

You watched as she continued to apply the numeral pink to his lips. She could have stopped four seconds ago and it would have been perfect, but she had to keep going until their was a light shine on his bottom lip.

‘Whoops, too shiny let me fix that.’ She said bending closer to his mouth. She puckered her lips and blew gently, as if that was going to solve the problem.

You looked forward as she smiled triumphantly, the noise he had made making the smug look in her eyes grow darker. Crossing your arms you turned to face the mirror in front of you and you couldn’t help but catch the eye of another member who had witnessed the whole thing. Seeing that you stood and left the dressing room, not caring that your boyfriend was calling after you.

Not having any way to get home you just took your seat and waited. You tried to smile and laugh when they finally made their way onto the stage but there was no hiding the fact that you were hurt. If he was doing that around you what was he doing when you weren’t? Thinking only made you madder and seeing him staring at you with worried eyes only made you fuming.

In the car afterwards you tried not to sit next to him but he made people shift so he could. He tried to place his hand on you knee but you moved away. He tried to kiss you cheek but you pushed his chest. All you wanted to do was cry.

Getting back to your shared apartment you ignored him, even though he was talking like nothing was wrong. He wold have finally stopped when you walked into the bathroom and slammed the door, taking your clothes of angrily before stepping into the hot shower you had started for yourself…

Jaebum:

You slamming the door would make his mind race. What had happened that you were now slamming doors? When you got out of the shower he watched you B-line it into your shared room. The sight of your bare back with pearls of water still holding to your skin made him smile, he loved your back. He’d stand and make his way over to you, licking his lips in the process before he was right behind you. You knew he was there but you had nothing to say to him, so ignoring him was your best option. That was until you felt his lips start on your shoulder and move up your neck. You stepped forward, continuing to ignore him as you reached for a set of comfy clothes. ‘Baby.’ he’d say wrapping his arms around your shoulders to try again. The thought of his lips made you sick, so you pushed him off of you. ‘Leave me alone.’ you said taking the clothes and heading back towards the bathroom. ‘Jagi, whats wrong?’ He’d say, his voice giving away the concern that erupted though his stomach. ‘I said leave me alone.’ You spat. You were just about to slam the door again when he caught it and followed you into the bathroom. ‘Tell me what is wrong.’ He said with stern eyes as you angrily pulled the shirt you grabbed over your head, scoffing when you realized it was his. ‘That shit that you pulled? That was embarrassing. How dare you let shit like that happen especially when I’m sitting right there next to you.’ You said, tears welling in your eyes.

‘Y/n, what are you talking about!’ He said trying to reach out for you again only to have you pull away. ‘Really? Are you that stupid that you didnt even realize that whats her face was all over you! Blowing on your fucking mouth, are you kidding me!’ You said, your loud voice now echoing off of the walls. ‘She was practically rubbing it in my face.’ You added, this time a bit quieter. He rubbed the back of his neck before rubbing his face and trying to pull you in one more time. This time you let him, you hated it when he looked upset. ‘Im so sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking.’ He said wrapping his arms around you tightly. ‘I can’t handle that kind of things. And if thats happening when I’m sitting right next to you? What happening when I’m not.’ You said, tears now falling.

‘Im so sorry. Nothing. Nothing is happening. Please, Jagi.’

He was your sense of comfort so as you cried you couldn’t help your hands that had wondered up to hold on to his back. Seeing how upset this had made you ruined him, he never wanted to see you cry and the fact that he was the one who made you broke his heart. He’d hold onto you as long as he needed too and although he knew you handnt fully forgave him, it wouldn’t stop him from making it very known that the behavior that had happened was uncalled for and would never happen again.

Mark:

Mark would never do anything he thought would hurt you in any way. All he wanted was to be the best version of himself just for you. So when you started acting cold towards him his mind would race. He wouldn’t be able to focus during the show, talking less then he already did and when questions were sent his way he was having trouble answering them. When you stormed into the bathroom he figured maybe you just forgot to but deodorant on? He knew how weird you got when you thought you smelt so He’d leave you be, settling himself on the couch and turning the tv on. When you walked out with wet messy hair and in your pajamas he figured you were just tired, but he knew you were never to tired for him. He’d try anything to make you feel good. He stood, corning you in the kitchen before dipping his head down in attempt to kiss you. When you turned your head so he caught cheek his eyebrows would push together, you never turned down a kiss from him. He’d catch your chin and make you look at him, trying to bring his lips to yours again only to have you push his chest hard do he stumbled back away from you. ‘Don’t touch me.’ You said shooting daggers at him before picking up the drink you had poured and walking past him. You only made it half way to your bedroom before his hand caught your elbow. He spun you causing the drink to spill slightly and you to cuss. ‘What part of don’t touch me did you not understand!’ You yelled, trying to fight the lurch you heart gave when his eyes turned from confused to hurt.

‘What wrong?’ He’d ask in a small voice.

‘Whats wrong? Whats wrong is that my boyfriend Someone who is supposed to love me drops me in the blink of an eye when someone else is flirting with them. And the best part? He doesn’t even try to stop it.’ You yelled, pointing a finger at him so he knew exactly who you were talking about. His shoulders would slump and he’d take his bottom lip between his lips. ‘Jagi I-’

‘Dont Jagi I me. I saw what happened. I was there.’ You said turning to leave again. His hand reached for yours again and pulled you back around but this time when he turned you he saw just how hurt you were. ‘Please, I didnt mean it. I didnt think.’ He said trying to pull you into a hug. ‘Mark, stop.’ You said taking in a shaky breath. The hurt in his eyes made your heart turn over and you knew he meant it, you just weren’t ready to forgive him. ‘Im so sorry.’ was all he could whisper as he let you walk away again.

He knew you too well. The moment you were wrapped up in your blankets, tears slowing down and the need for him to hold you over powering you he was already in the room. He’d muster out a small ‘Jagi?’ Seeing if you were willing to talk to him and when you let your head poke up from the covers he’d rush over to you, making you scoot onto his side of the bed so he could slip under the covers in front of you and pull you into his chest. This brought a new wave of tears as you fisted the fabric of his shirt and cried. ‘I love you so much, I’m so sorry.’ you cried. He stroked your hair and made soft shushing noises to break up the sad ‘I love you’s’ he was whispering back to you.

Jackson:

Being completely oblivious of what had happened he’d be all over you the moment you stepped out of the shower. His hand would reach out for your towel and tug at it, laughing playfully as you tugged away from him and continued your way towards the bedroom. He’d then wrap his arms around you and continue to walk you forward, kissing your bare shoulder as the two of you went.

‘I swear to God, Jackson. Get off of me.’ You said shaking your shoulder hard, not caring as it ran gently into his chin.

‘y/n?’ He said, he would have thought you were just kidding and would have jumped right back into playing around, but the fact the you didnt apologize for hitting him in the face set his alarms off. You ignored him, and not caring if he was still standing there watching you, you stripped. Replacing the towel with your pajamas you climbed into bed and pulled the covers up, biting your lip as your eyes began to water. Jackson would call your name again and soon the feeling of the bed dipping down around you told you that he was sitting next to you. ‘I said leave me alone, Jackson.’ Your voice failed, giving off the fact that you were now crying.

‘Jagi, whats wrong? Hey, hey!’ He’d say softly, pulling at your arms till you were sitting up with your face in his chest.

‘Don’t touch me!’ You yelled hitting his chest, but as you tried to pull your arms out of his grip he just held on tighter, not letting you go.

‘Talk to me, why are you mad!’

‘You!” You screamed, finally getting him to let you go. ‘You sit there and humiliate me letting that… that bimbo actively flirt with you! She knew exactly what she was doing and stared at me while she did it! Obviously knowing that you weren’t going to do shit! You-’ He cut you off by pulling you into his chest, tears stinging his eyes as he realized what he had done and how much he had actually hurt you.

All he could do was say he was sorry as he buried his face into your neck, holding onto you tightly. His sorries would be staggered with a string of ‘please don’t leave me, please ill change.’ It would shock him how much this actually bothered him. You half expected him to laugh at your tears and tell you you were dumb, but how upset he had gotten only told you how much he loved you. You’d surprise him when you wrapped your arms around his head, your fingers gently playing with his hair as you silently cried realizing how rude you were being.

‘please don’t give me a reason to think you don’t love me.’ would be all you said before letting him kiss you sweetly.

Jinyoung:

Conversations from earlier in the day would sent him in a certain mood and while you showered it’d be all he could think about. He’d have trouble containing himself as he waited for the water to turn off and as soon as it did he was outside the bathroom door to wait for you. He’d smirk as you opened the door and looked up to him before walking right past to the bedroom. He followed you, watching the way your hips swayed under the towel and how your wet hair left streams of water down your bare back. You’d have walked up to the bed where your usual sleeping shirt was laying, not even realizing Jinyoung was standing behind you until his hands were running up your bare arms. You ignored him while reaching forward to slip the shirt over your body before stepping just out of his reach to slip on a pair of shorts. He’d step to you and take your cheeks between his hands before trying to lean down to kiss you. When you pulled your face from his hands he’d look at you with upset and confused eyes, confused as to why you were acting like this when not even three hours ago you were whispering things to one another. ‘Are we not going to do this?’ He’d ask, the throbbing in his pants subsiding as he thought about your buzz kill mood.

‘No, Jinyoung. Were not ‘doing this’.’ You said scoffing at him before walking back into the bathroom. He’d roll his eyes and turned around, readying himself for bed. Lights out and laying as far from him as possible you started to cry. He didnt care, if he did he would have figured out that you were mad at him by then. You’d sniffle once as his arm lazily found its way around your neck like it did every night, but still nothing. You’d take his arm off of you, removing yourself from the comfort of your blanket. He’d watch you stand up and make your way to the kitchen, eyebrows pressing together when you refused to return. He never was able to sleep well without you.

‘Jagi? Are you okay?” He’d finally say, bringing him from the bed and making his way over to you.

‘Go back to bed Jinyoung.’ You’d say. He’d realized that it wasn’t the kitchen that you had gone to, but the couch in the living room.

‘What are you doing in here?’ He said, eyebrows still pressed together.

‘Sleeping. Go away.’ You said rolling over so your back was not to him.

‘I dont understand why you would sleep out here when-’

‘Of course you don’t understand, Jinyoung! You never understand. You never open your eyes and realize how big of an idiot you are!’ You said, sitting fully up. You couldn’t help but cringe slightly at your choice of words.

‘Why are you acting like this?’ He’d say crossing his arms over his chest.

‘Why are you putting me second place to other girls? If i knew all it took was a few bats of the eyelash I wouldn’t have waisted any of my time!’ You said standing up so you were now practically nose to nose.

‘When did i put you second-’

‘The fact that you even have to ask that question is the reason why. I get it, girls flirt with you all day long, its apart of the job. But when Im- me the girl you live with and say ‘I love you’ too every night, when Im sitting there and its very obvious you’re into the attention the cute make up artist is giving you its very obvious I’m second.

‘Thats not true, y/n.’ He’d say making you scoff.

‘Then how about this,’ You started standing up, now more angry than ever. ‘You get to sleep on the couch tonight. See for yourself how it feels to be second.’ You said throwing the couch pillow at him and storming off into the bedroom. He wouldn’t let it drop that easy and would come bursting into the bed room, grabbing your hand and pulling you to look at him before you could get into bed.

‘Nothing. No one comes before you. Let that be clear. And now being aware of it I will make sure to put you where you deserve to be.’ He’d pause, hastily reaching for your cheek to stoke it, smiling slightly to himself when you let him. ‘I love you so much. Im so sorry you have to put up with my shit.’

Youngjae:

The moment you had started to act distant towards him he’d know something was wrong. Usually when you got upset with him he’d wait it out, apologizing for what ever he did and you would turn around, tell him it was okay and the two of you would cuddle it out. This time was different. He had tried to hold your hand on the car ride home only to have you turn your attention to Jackson and start talking about how he thought the day went. He’d try again a little later, this time apologizing, but when you rolled your eyes knowing perfectly that he had no idea what he was apologizing for you’d just give him a stern look before folding your arms across your chest. Once home, he followed you like a puppy just trying to get you to talk to him but when you slammed the bathroom door in his face and turned on the water to drown out his calls he finally stopped. He’d go to your bedroom and sit on the bed with his head in his hands trying to figure out away to get you to tell him what was wrong. He ended on trying something new. No more pleading, just your favorite acts of love.

He’d watch you walk into your bedroom with just a towel wrapped around you. The daggers you sent him before turning back to your closet made him nervous. With a mental Fuck it He’d stand and close the space between the two of you. Just like he hoped you melted under his touch, letting him kiss up your neck till his lips landed on your cheek. You turned, ready to finally say anything and he’d press his lips to you, giving you the rough passionate kiss that always took you by surprise.

‘Im so sorry, I love you so much.’ He’d say between kisses. This brought reality back into your mind and instantly you pushed him off of you.

‘You don’t even know what your sorry about.’ you said softly, no matter how mad you were you couldn’t get yourself to yell at him.

‘Please.’

‘Jae, you… That girl was all over you and you did nothing.’ You said biting your lip. The hurt in his eyes making you feel small and want nothing more than to wrap your arms around him. He hurt you though.

‘I didnt even realize it.’ He said, now knowing exactly what you were talking about. You gave a sarcastic laugh and shook you head, turning away from him once more.

‘You could have anyone and the fact that she felt like she could do that right infant of me just proves that you aren’t as serious about this as I am. I love you with all of my heart and you give girls the vibe that they can take you from me when ever they want. If that happened while I was sitting right next to you what happens when I’m not?’ You said, his eyes began to glisten at what you were suggesting.

‘I would never let anyone come between us, y/n. You know that.’

‘Do I? Because the one time you had a chance to actually prove that you did nothing.’

Thats what would wreck him. The fact that you were right, a girl was actively flirting with him and instead of stopping it he let it happen and he let you see it. He wouldn’t say anything other than a small ‘you’re right.’ to which you’d nod and let him pull you into another hug, this time accepting his promises to always be more attentive to what was happening around him, wether you were there or not.

BamBam:

You could hardly walk out of the bathroom you had been silently tearing in for the past hour without BamBam coming up behind you and slipping his hands under the towel that you clung to your body. ‘God, I want you so bad right now.’ He’d say, his lips grazing your ear before he nipped gently and started to kiss on your sweet spot. Normally you would be a giggling mess right now, already pooling in your panties just with the sole fact of getting him naked. He didnt seem to notice your lack of excitement through the feeling of your next to naked body was pressed against his already growing member. ‘You horny cause that bitch turned you on?’ You said finally getting enough courage to pull out of his grip. Not waiting for a response you walked into the bedroom and slammed the door, and quickly changing before he could walk into the room.

‘What do you mean?’ He’d say with a light bite to his voice.

‘Do you feel obligated to come back to me every night? Is that why we literally have sex all the time? Because girls at work are basically dry humping your dick and you feel like you can’t act on it? Do you picture them when you flip me over?’ You said throwing your towel at him. He caught it, his expression going from 100 to 0 real quick.

‘How could you say that?’ He said, his voice now small.

‘How could I say that?’ You started crossing your arms over your chest. ‘How could you basically let every girl in that room earlier know that Im just a show? That anyone could have you if they just tried hard enough!’ You said throwing the towel that was on your head at him now.

‘Does she fulfill your needs when I can’t? Will she let you do things that I’m uncomfortable with? Was that her marking her territory? Letting me know that you really don’t work late hours, that you spend more time with her?’ You yelled, frustration making your face read and your eyes tear up again.

‘Are you really- do you really think I would cheat on you?’ He said trying to take a step forward, but the look on your face told him he’d be better staying where he was.

‘I didnt think you would actually engage in a flirty conversation in front of me, but here we are.’

He was speechless. He knew there was nothing he could say to make you feel better and it was overwhelming. He’d move to sit on the edge of the bed and dropped his head into his hands, wracking his brain on something to say that would make you feel better. Your heart lurched for him and for a second you wanted him to hold you, but you were to proud. It didnt help that he thought of him knocking boots with the make up artist in a closet kept running through your mind. With a single tear running down your cheek you started to walk out of the room, the sight of him making your feel sick. You had been so convinced up until now that he was the love of your life. That nothing could touch the two of you.

You weren’t even able to make it to the door when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you hard. You didnt even have a chance to stumble before he was hugging you tightly, his arms wrapping themselves around your neck and shoulders.

‘Please, please don’t. I would never… I love you so much, please don’t walk away.’

‘Then give me a reason to stay.’ you said, both of you crying silent tears. He’d sniffle and lean back just enough to take your cheeks between his hands. He looked at you longingly, thumbs softly stroking the backs of your cheeks. There was a slight hiccup in his chest before he kissed you softly. Despite how angry you were the same feeling of excitement and passion erupted through your entire body. It was so loud in your ear that you didnt even realize your arms had reached up to hold him to you.

‘Please believe me when I say Id never do anything like that.’

Yugyeom:

Walking out of the shower you’d walk right into his arms. You had looked so amazing that day and he could hardly wait to get you home and express just how beautiful you were to him. His lips would be on yours in an instant as he softly held your head to his. He’d tried to deepen the kiss but you weren’t budging. You couldn’t ever get yourself to hurt Yugyeom, no matter how stupid he could be at times. Even now as you were held tightly to his chest, the sight of the make up artist blowing on his lips and the noise he had made kept running through your mind. You finally pushed him off of you, feeling like you could taste her breath. ‘No. Not happening.’ You said walking away from him.

You’ve played this game before, let him kiss you a bit and then moving away. He knew you loved to be chased so with a goofy grin he’d walk quickly after you, bending so he could get a good grip of your waist before picking you up off the ground.

‘Yugyeom I said no!.’ You yelled prying his hands off of you before turning around and pushing his chest. His face would fall in confusion, now not quite sure how serious you were being. You’ve never pushed him away that hard before. He decided to try again thinking maybe third times a charm.

‘Get off of me!’ You screamed raising your elbow from his grip. ‘Do not touch me. Do not touch me, do not touch me! Damn get it through your thick skull!’ You yelled as you turned to face him.

‘Why are you being like this?’ He’d say, it now fully registering that you were pissed.

‘Oh I don’t know, maybe its the weather, maybe I’m on my period. Or maybe, and you’ll laugh at this one, maybe my boyfriend was sitting there letting some girl mock me while she basically pissed all over you!’ You yelled, not caring how loud your voice had gotten. You watched as his eyes closed and he sat on the bed.

‘What, you’re mad she proved to me how easy it is to get to you? How easy it would be for her to take you from me?’ You bit.

‘I would never leave you for her.’ he said, but it seemed to just make things worse.

‘Fine, maybe not her. But if she could get that close to get under my skin I can only imagine what someone else could do. You’re gone a lot and I thought you understood how i felt about you and how I feel about not being able to be with you all the time. Why shouldn’t I get mad when a girl who sees you more then I do starts blowing all over you. Actions speak louder than words and you the letting go of me the moment she batter her eyes at you was a message I received loud and clear.’

‘Y/n,’ He said looking back to you. You waited for him to say something but ended up scoffing as he took to long to find his words.

‘Y/n please, I didnt even realize-’

‘Of course you didnt, why would you.’

‘Don’t be like this.’ He’d say standing up and making his way over to you.

‘Like what? Worried that the one person I love more than anything else is allowing girls to throw themselves all over him? And then does it when I’m sitting right there? Do you know how much that hurts?’ You said, clearing your throat to try and hide the way it had faulted.

‘I messed up. I wasn’t even paying attention to her, I… Its sounds cliché…’ He started, but bit his lip and looked at the floor when you had risen an eyebrow at him. ‘Its just you looked so pretty today and I was embarrassed cause, well you do things to me…’

In that instant your hard face fell and your eyes widened.

‘Wait.’ You said, covering your mouth. ‘You were sitting there letting me scream at you because you were horny and trying to hide it?’ You said trying to hide your laugh.

‘Dont laugh at me, you always do that to me.’ He said giving you a small worried smile.

His body would relax when you reached out for him and hugged his was it tightly. ‘Im sorry I assumed the worse.’ You said into his shirt.

‘I didnt realize how bad it looked. Im sorry.’ He said hugging you back.

#got7 reactions #got7 #jaebum #mark #jackson #jinyoung #youngjae #bambam #yugyeom

[artificialqueens]

Alaska's Christmas Extravaganza ~ Hobnob

AN: You know, i love this time of year but people seem to really miss the true meaning of Christmas. I felt obliged to put it into context for the lovely folks at home. Lets have a look at some reviews shall we?

“The spelling was ok.”- Daily Mail

“There was a good attempt there.” -The Sunday Times

“I think i need to watch the show before getting any of this sweetie.” -My Mum

I hope Shangela reads this and finds the strength to win AS3~ Hobnob

–The scene sets in a small living room, adorned with various Christmas ornaments strung up around the mantlepiece. A crackling log fire fills the air with a certain smell akin to the time of year, and occasionally spits the odd ember onto the beige carpeted floor. An artificial tree in the far corner emits a low hum as it partially lights the dim room. Three individuals inhabit the area, sitting on a rather worn looking sofa whilst watching BBC news in ugly Christmas sweaters.–

Jinkx: Alaska you little shit.

Alaska: Hiee.

Jinkx: The nextdoor neighbours said you smothered their Christmas tree in faeces and ate their dog.

Alaska: (Gnawing at a bone) I can’t help it. Christmas is shit.

Jinkx: (Getting up and turning the telly off) You’re gonna have to go get it together before we go to my nans Christmas party on Saturday.

Alaska: If you make me go i’ll set her milky eyes on fire!

Jinkx: Jesus christ Alaska thats messed up.

Alaska: Yeah well you’re jewish. You don’t even celebrate Christmas.

Alaska: Christmas can suck my wang!!

Roxxxy: (Speaking up with a mouth full of mince pies #thickandjuicy) Sounds like you need…the spirit of Christmas.

Alaska: The spirit of Christmas?

Roxxxy: Didn’t you know? Legend says Shangela has the ability to grant unlimited holiday cheer with a single holy halleloo.

Alaska: Gay.

Roxxxy: (Sobbing, but continuing to eat) Its not gay Alaska!

Roxxxy: And you’d better find your Christmas cheer before Jinkxseses nans party.

Alaska: I don’t see it for me but ok.

Jinkx: I won’t have you ruining it like last year.

Alaska: Wasn’t that bad.

Roxxxy: You killed 5 salvation army workers with a decorative star.

Alaska: And I’d do it again!!!

Alaska: I couldn’t care less about that party. I don’t care for Christmas. Tiny Tim can contract ebola!!

Roxxxy: (Checking her casio sports watch) I’m late for the bus guys gtg. Bingo is in half an hour.

Alaska: Hmmmm…the spirit of Christmassssss🤔🤔🐍sssounds gay…

–Alaska gets up and walks to the window. The snowfall isn’t all that heavy as small flakes are illuminated by a street lamp with lewd drawings carved into the side. She could drive around to find the Shangela, except she owned a BMW, and rear wheel drive is shit in winter so she’d probably crash into some schoolboys on their way home.–

Alaska: Jinkx i need a lift.

Jinkx: I can’t, my cars in the shop.

Jinkx: you keyed the entirety of Aja’s Valentina speech on it last week.

–A shadowy figure in a Santa hat approaches the window and taps the glass with a skeletal finger.–

Ru: It’s me, God!

Ru: Wait.

Ru: It’s me, Rupaul!

Alaska: Rupaul? I thought Miss Fame set you on fire for eating meat?

Ru: (Neck rolling) My body is an illusion chiilde. My existence is merely a string of conscious decisions ive made prior to this mortal realm.

Alaska: Party.

Alaska: Please mawma. Help me find Shangela so I won’t be a cunt to my loved ones all the time.

Ru: Well…i suppose I’m all out of queens to block on twitter…

Ru: Aight lets make this quick, i have a bingo game in half an hour.

–They both get in Rupauls Toyota Camry and speed off whilst remaining under the speed limit. Road safety is important at this time of year as 70% of road collisions occur at Christmas.–

Alaska: (Shedding her skin) Where the bloody hell would Shangela be?

Ru: In todays maxi challenge, we’ll be traveling to the happiest place on earth!

Alaska: Lapland?

Ru: Close.

Ru: Scotland!

Alaska: Oh.

Alaska: (Hissing at the radio) Change the station rupaul this is making my ears bleed.

Ru: Oh? But this is the latest hit off my smashing Christmas album, ‘The beggining of the realness glamazonian peanut walk-the rumix.’

Alaska: Well turn it off. Its upsetting Jinkxes nan.

–The pair of them turn around to see Jinkxes nan having a Christmas seizure.–

Ru: If you don’t like it Alaska, get out. I don’t have to put up with tomfuckery. I’m God!

Ru: Wait.

Ru: No yes thats right.

–Alaska ejects the CD and throws it outside at a schoolboy. She takes a CD from her bra and pops it in as one of her many compelling songs begins to play.–

Alaska: Anus now available at your closest pound world.

Ru: Get out.

–Alaska is thrown out the car into a pile of snow.–

Alaska: Fuck you Rupaul you saggy bastard!!

Ru: See you at all stars 17 lad.

Ru: (Neck rolling) Oh you…forgot this.

–Rupaul throws Jinkxes nan into the pile of snow and speeds off.– Alaska: Shit.

–Alaska spots a warm glow in the distance. On further inspection it’s a humble pub. She approaches it, stepping over Jinkxes nan along the way. Once inside she spots a booth of old geezers.–

Alaska: Mrs. Kasha Davis? Tempest Dujour? Why you here?

Mrs. Kasha Davis: Us old folk have a hard time finding a place to stay during winter, and you know what they say!

Alaska: There’s always time for a cocktail?

Mrs. Kasha Davis: No. Mrs. Kasha Davis: (Tearing up) I have no grasp of my drinking problem and I’m sadder than I’ve ever been help me please.

Alaska: Lol hiee.

Tempest: Your aura is jacked. What’s troubling you?

Alaska: I need to find Shangela. Legend says a single halleloo can light a soul on fire with Christma-

Tempest: Dont talk to me about legend you lanky shit. I invented that story.

Tempest: Besides, that’s just a myth i created.

Alaska: But why Tempest?

Tempest: To get those kids off my danm lawn!

Charlie: (Raising her pint) Here here!

Alaska: Then that means…I’m doomed to hate Christmas forever…

Mrs. Kasha Davis: Yeah looks like it.

Alaska: I think I’ll go watch the Sherlock Christmas special.

Alaska: Thanks for literally nothing.

–Alaska hangs her head and pushes a pint glass off the table sadly :( She begins to exit the pub.–

Charlie: Wait!!! You have passed the test.

Alaska: (Turning back around) Pardon?

Charlie: Most people prefer the Doctor Who Christmas special, but the Sherlock Christmas special is far superior. You have passed the test.

–The seniors huddle together and whisper amongst themselves before turning back to Alaska.–

Tempest: Shangela is in fact real.

Tempest: We were only goofing you before because you’re sort of a dick.

Alaska: So Shangela is in the happiest place on earth Scotland?

Mrs. Kasha Davis: (Guffawing) Dont be silly.

Mrs. Kasha Davis: Scotland doesn’t exist. Shangela lives in Sheffield, up in the block of flats behind Lidl.

Tempest: I hear the Lidl fruit cake is very good this year.

Mrs. Kasha Davis: Yes Ive heard that too.

Tempest: Mmm very good.

Charlie: Bit too dense for me. Gives me diarrhoea.

–They all look around to Alaska who’s disappeared.–

Tempest: Shit.

–Around an hour later and Alaska finds herself outside a large council estate. She travels up the flight of stairs to a door with a Christmas wreath. She rips it off the door and knocks. A Christmas present rolls out the door and Shangela pops out.–

Shangela: Haleoo?

Alaska: Hiee are you…

Alaska: (Looking down at her hand) Shanjello?

Shangela: Maybe i am. maybe i arent.

Shangela: I just huffed an entire tube of paint i genuinely don’t know anymore.

Alaska: This entire holiday is aids.

Alaska: I got frostbite on the way up and i left Jinkxes nan to die in a pile of snow.

Alaska: I need some Christmas spirit.

Shangela: (Taking out a fat blunt and taking a massive chong) Listen here you lanky shit.

Shangela: Many before you have tried, and most have failed.

Shangela: Just like on drag race, consequence for failure…is death.

Alaska: I’m not sure that’s correct.

Shangela: Yeah sorry its the drugs.

Shangela: Alright go get me some Lidl fruit cake and i’ll give you my sweet Christmas goo.

Alaska: Ok but i never want to hear the phrase ‘sweet Christmas goo’ ever again.

Alaska: Biee

Shangela: (Waving and grinning) No problem giant purple rat.

Shangela: Is the sky melting?

–Alaska makes her way inside Lidl and grabs a big ol fruit cake. At the counter she couldn’t help but feeling she knew the cashier dressed up in a reindeer costume. She pushes a schoolboy over and places her baked Christmas goods on the counter along with a litre bottle of tizer which was only a quid insane bargain.–

Raja: 3 quid mate.

Alaska: Raja??? You work in Lidl???

Raja: Aye.

Raja: You know how it is. Crippling debt and all that.

Raja: Turns out 75,000 pounds goes quickly if you spend it all on grey hair dye.

Alaska: I didn’t ask but ok, werk.

Raja: What are you doing here? You hate Christmas and seasonal foods.

Alaska: it’s not for me, Shangela is exchanging Cake for Christmas spirit.

Raja: (Gasping) That idea is a boot from me. Shangela is a very vengeful and evil spirit!

Raja: OI RAVEN.

Raven: (From across the room working another counter) WHAT.

Raja: THE CUNTS ONLY GONE AND MADE A DEAL WITH SHANGELA.

Raven: WELL GET HER OUT THE STORE I WONT BE CLEANING UP BLOOD OFF THE FLOOR.

Raja: (Turning back to Alaska) Would you like a bag for an extra 5p?

Alaska: Vengeful spirit? What are you on about?

Raja: Well, back on our season there happened to be a Christmas challenge…

Raja: All was going well. The room was full of seasonal cheer! That was all until a large box was rolled out and we were all proper gagged.

Raja: Shangela popped out of the box after being eliminated from last season. She was ready to snatch the crown by any means necessary.

Raja: As it turns out she did so badly in the challenge, she landed herself in the bottom 2 once again.

Raja: Fuelled by her hatred for tulle fabric and Mimi Imfurst, she managed to stay in the competition. But at a cost…

Raja: Ever since, she’s hated Christmas! And steals the souls of those who cannot bring her Christmas cake!!

Raven: RAJA DID YOU TELL HER THE STORY?

Raja: I’M TELLING IT NOW FUCK OFF.

Alaska: (Hands over the money) Sounds fake.

Alaska: See you at Jinkxes nans party!

Raja: Bye.

Raja: Daft cunt…

–Back outside Shangela’s door, Alaska knocks three times. Did she have anything to worry about? Was Raja’s warning true?–

Shangela: Haleoo?

Alaska: I brought you fruit cake.

Shangela: Who are you?

Alaska: We met 10 minutes ago.

Shangela: Ah! Giant purple rat!

–Alaska hands over the cake and Shangela observes it for a moment.–

Shangela: This…this i-is not Christmas fruit cake…

Alaska: Oh man really? Haa i must’ve picked up partytime gyozas by accident my bad.

Shangela: (Fists trembling as she goes red) YOU HAVE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE..

Alaska: Omf the look on your face right now…priceless.

Alaska: Hey what’s your wifi password?

Shangela: IM-IM.

–Shangela begins to transform as she morphs into a disgusting snowman creature. Finally she lets out a blood curdling screech and lunges at Alaska.–

Shangela: HAAALEEELOOOOOOOOOOO

Alaska: (Dodging Shangela’s punch) Hmm i think Raja may of been on to something…

Alaska: I’d better get out of here huh.

–Alaska begins to boot it down the stairs, Shangela hot on her heels, throwing glasses of Absolut cocktails at her. Alaska’s lanky knees give way as she clatters to the floor. She was at the mercy of Shangela, who towered over her menacingly.–

Shangela: I DONT HAVE A CHRISTMAS CAKE IVE NEVER HAD A CHRISTMAS CAKE IF I WANTED CHRISTMAS CAKE YES I PROBABLY COULD GO OUT AND GET ONE BECAUSE I AM WHAT? HUNGRY. YOU COULD NEVER HAVE A CHRISTMAS CAKE BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT THAT KIND OF GIRL BABY EVERYTHING I HAVE EATEN IVE WORKED FOR AND GOTTEN MYSELF I HAVE BUILT MYSELF FROM THE GROUND UP YOU FUCKING BITCH.

Alaska: (Cowering and shaking in fear) IM SO CONFUSED IS THIS A REFERENCE TO SOMETHING?

–Suddenly a Toyota Camry screeches to a halt. The door opens and it’s Rupaul!–

Ru: Alaska! Get in!

–Alaska picks herself off the floor and hops in the car. They speed away as Shangela runs after them, her snowman body gaining power in the heavy snow.–

Alaska: Rupaul? Why did you come back?

Ru: Ive been listening to Anus!

Ru: I relate a lot to the message of nails.

–Shangela lets out another roaring halleloo as she continues to throw acid cocktails. Alaska cooks up an idea stew.–

Alaska: Ru! Drive back to Jinkxes house!

Ru: What? Why? She’ll destroy the place!

Alaska: Trust mawma.

–When they arrive at Jinkxes house Ru does a sick tailspin and stops in the driveway. They leg it inside as a confused Jinkx is setting out party foods and drinks.–

Alaska: JINKX! DID YOU BUY CHRISTMAS FRUIT CAKE FOR THE PARTY?

Jinkx: What? Yeah it’s my nans favourite.

Alaska: Your nan is dead Jinkx!

Alaska: Go get the fucking cake!!

Jinkx: Wait what?

Alaska: No time to explain go grab the cake!!

Jinkx: Did you say my nan-

Alaska: Jinkx really gurl priorities. Get the fucking cake.

–Jinkx goes into the kitchen and comes back with the baked goods in hand. Alaska hurries to the front door and swings it open to find a now 50 ft tall Shangela running towards the house. She readies her throwing arm into Shangela’s agape mouth and takes aim.–

Alaska: Merry Christmas.

Alaska: motherfucker.

–She throws it with her massively lanky arms as it lands in Shangela’s throat. Shangela munches for a bit before nodding her head and returning to her original size.–

Shangela: Bloody good cake that. Aight you’ve earned your Christmas spirit Alaska.

Alaska: Thanks.

Alaska: But you know, i don’t think i need it.

Alaska: I’ve learnt that Christmas isn’t about Holiday spirit, or even our loved ones.

Alaska: It’s about food. I get it now.

Ru: Good job chiiilde. You figured it out.

Ru: Looks like my work here, (Winks) is done.

Alaska: But where will you go?

Ru: Wherever I’m needed.

Ru: Plus i hear Michelle got in trouble with the feds for smuggling coke in her boobs, so i’d better go help her out.

Alaska: Bieeeee.

–People start arriving for the Christmas party. Tempest Dujour, Mrs. Kasha Davis, Charlie Hides, Raja, Raven and even Roxxxy take their places at the table and begin to chow down on the delicious munchies. Just before Alaska goes inside Shangela lets out a small cough.–

Shangela: Hey, I’m sorry about earlier. You’ve taught me the true meaning of Christmas, and I’m forever grateful for that henny.

Alaska: You know…there is an extra place at the table since we killed Jinkxes nan…

Alaska: Want to join us?

Shangela: Well, i am out of paint to huff…

Shangela: You know what? Halleloo i do!!

–And so everyone gathered around for this most festive of holidays, rejoicing and eating those mini sausage rolls that taste better cold. Roxxxy’s bingo game went well, the old folks had a place to stay, Jinkx was sobbing into the tablecloth, and most importantly, Alaska had found out the true meaning of Christmas. Merry Christmas to one and all reading this, and i hope you go to Lidl for your shopping this festive season. Halleloo.–

#hobnob #christmas fic #alaska thunderfuck #jinkx monsoon #roxxxy andrews #mrs kasha davis #charlie hides #tempest dujour #raja gemini #raven #rpdr fanfiction #submission #shangela laquifa wadley #crack fic #rupaul

[thegurlbehindthesmile]

I Wonder....

Hologram- The Technicolors plays in the background.

What race did i think i was in all this time? It was like this perpetual reminder constantly nagging me in my head...

what your 18 better not be singe for long-

 better go to college and forget about boys

- better get a degree and make lots of money

...married at 22 no degree - 

better excel in your career and climb the corporate ladder. 

hours of work and devotion 

BUT wait, dont work too hard you gotta have kids before your 30

what about an apartment- 

how about a trailer- 

how about a HOUSE. 

.. First son at 27- 

turning 30 at the end of this year. where did the time go?

...together for 11 years, married for 7 years, a 2 year old , a house, a dog, two cars.

i did exactly what i wanted to do in life.   i suppose.

don’t get me wrong i probably would seem obnoxiously ungrateful if i didn’t just stop there and say THANKS.

beautiful son. gorgeous husband.

the list goes on-  everything ive set my mind to in the past decade i have made come true.

NOW WHAT

i had this alarm in my head that i had to do “all this before 30″ why?? health reasons? statistic reasons? rumors? stories, why?

i feel like im rounding the last bend to a marathon i didnt even ask to be in? (or did i??!)

i think throughout my hussle and bussle (although i DID have SOME fun) i got lost in it all. I quickly entered the world of being 18 shattered battered and...engaged? positive that the love i was about to receive would catapult me into everything id ever needed.  (i guess it sorta did.)   career driven. beautiful. man on my side. ring on my hand “livin life” literally just climbing any career ladder i could- i had my “husband” as my cheerleader at my side. HUSBAND guys would say- “you’re to young”. yeah i got that ALOT. going to 21st birthday parties as the only married girl there. WHO WAS I.  we took married and young by the horns. i was so driven. you get over whelmed by the freedom. naturally you fall into some sort of rhythm because nice things cost money, and time just passes as you work and watch your work pay off. you feel accomplished. i was sure i saw my career in site and one would assume this WAS IT. this was the magic they talked about- enjoying your 20s- having a career u love- being MARRIED and secure. perfect...................

we were... the first couple to have an apartment. (so; big parties- no rules *rolls eyes)  we had a”wedding” so we had all these lovely gifts and things to lavish ourselves with in our first apartment. THE DREAM right?  just working and living and having fun. we traveled alot,, camped- we had big dreams to always be “like this” forever. in a moment (5 years into the beautiful maddness actually) we were sure we needed to materialize this power we had. this “love” we had needed to be a thing, a thing we wanted to nurture and bless and carry with us on our adventures. we had so much love we were ready to see what we could grow. (and grow it did- we had JP) 

the first year was hard- a new dynamic...we werent 2 anymore we were 3. and all of our decisions had a larger precaution. we wanted different things. rooted things. more stability. more direction. the air was different.

i was different.

i had put my career aside in my mind to concentrate on.on being something that something ELSE would flourish and grow beautifully in (um literally?) KIDS. i will be the first to tell you, kids were not on my radar (i just never saw myself as a kid person, i never understood the look parents give their little humans time after time- it confused me- it scared me i guess. it was just foreign.) till... i put allllll other thoughts aside. most definetly my first act of unconditional unselfish love. “hey self, we are about to give up our entire self to producing another human being” everything you smell eat touch. EVERYTHING. its like...well its like nothing youve ever gone through before until youve gone through it. we are fuckin amazing..the body can do some fuckin shit. COMPLETELY change in order to make this THING ... HUMANS and yeah. real hearts and lungs and little legs (oh and the hiccups, the awesome hiccups)

PHysically and mentally you go through some shit and although that may have been obvious to some- most??? it was not for me.

Mount Everest- Labrinth.

its just alot. im already not the best mentally- so to add this new function. emotional bandwith overload papi.

first its like 2,000 percent mom over load. YOU ARE A MOM and this teeny tiny creature needs you. NEEDS you. a need you thought you knew BUT YOU DO NOT. its this overwhelming warming beautiful amazing thing, the need a kid has for their parents. (i was IN IT- DEEP in IT)   IN love wasnt even the world. i do not loveeeee my son. my son IS LOVE. i can not explain it. but you get mentally rewired. i am not the girl i was before, im just not. 

i no longer wanted the career i had before. i no longer even wanted the LIFE i had before. i wanted more of this drug my son was giving me. this surreal daydream of laughs and kisses and just moments. time literally passes differently now. i see things differently now,  i feel things differently now. things have so much different meaning. i swear its as if im stuck in some molly, acid, shroom trip.

i feel like someone lit a fire to my soul and everything i touch now is illuminated differently.  when a person is growing inside you you can feel their heartbeat. you can feel the brush of their leg as they roll over to get comfortable. life has different meaning. LOVE has different meaning. love darling is caring you for 9 months and waiting with baited breathe for a stranger youve created. its a smell youve never smelled before and instantly is your favorite. its like you were never comfortable before they fell asleep in your arms, youve never known true peace until their skin was comfortable by yours. ITS PURE MAGIC .  i was different.  

some of the things i loved before, i- was confused about now. 

Love was different for me now,

how i wanted to give love.

how i wanted to receive love.

like a perpetual darkness was lifted from my eyes.

Wash.-Bon Iver

Im sorry i didnt know it would change ME. (im sorry about how cliche that sounds..)

from the moment i was little. it was go to school. get good grades. to go college. find a nice boy. get married. move in together, start a family- live happily ever after

but they leave out the nitty griddies. (even my own parents were divorced. who was anyone kidding) the years following our marriage all we heard about was how divorce was at its all time high. we vowed (among other things) that , that wouldnt be us. we both came from homes and divorce and we didnt want that for us. 

i think it was then that divorce became this ugly word. scary word. bad word.  i mean it is though..right?...

verb

1.legally dissolve one's marriage with (someone)

2.separate or dissociate (something) from something else.

we got married because. well im sure for different reasons?

i got married because,( it was what i was suppose to do?). you find someone you love and are attracted to and if your lucky enough to have them feel the same way- you... marry them. and thats that.you cant have kids or live with someone who you arent married too (said the stigma of my parents and those around me)  i mean i know theres more to it then that but a brief outline? leaving out all the mooshy stuff. you make this feeling legal, you change some names and now your not only emotionally reliant on this person but basically reliant on them for every fuckin single thing else too (basically).

marriage is beautiful.  if your lucky enough to find your soul mate in this world. someone who just gets you and enjoys your company and wierdness then your blessed and you would probably want to spend the rest of your existence with this person.  i mean it makes sense. 

its just as i’ve developed into this next stage of myself, ive made each of my actions have more purpose (i do this because everthing i do my son now sees and its just different now) howww i do something- what i say. i just think about it all and that includes the things i was naturally doing before that i never thought of.

marriage.  do i love my sons father yes. hes attractive and im attratced to him. hes funny and knows just how to make me laugh. its the little things. how he makes JP laugh or when their doing snuggles in his bed. how my son says Dada when hes upset or how he looks just like him. before my love for my husband was an array of things from love to lust- obsession. all the best and worse of love. we were inseparable. engulfed in each other in EVERY way, i knew we were in love and so did everyone around us. 

and then my son was born.

JP....i dont think you have to marry someone to show them how much you love them. i think true devotion starts with intention and your soul mate will know by your actions where your true feelings are.always be true. always be kind. i think if you want to love someone- love them fully, respectfully and unconditionally. learn and grow with them and from them and continue to make each other better people. and in that time you find your spark ignites another i employ you to indulge in meeting new people and new interactions. Make your heart full if you feel it hurting.  not bonded by anything physical but truly understanding that you were meant to love. REALLY LOVE. and maybe thats with one person forever, or a series of different people through out your life time in so many different and amazing ways. boys, girls.. just loving people and sparking the light in them only YOU can ignite. and becoming your best self.  only to continue to become your best self with that same intention for others. 

and thats my truth.   i look into your eyes and just want the best for you.knowing that’s different for you as it is me. but realizing i want to live by the example i want you to live by.

.... im not her anymore.

the day you were born i became someone new. 

[apolla62200]

Promise

Summary: Bucky has always thought he was damned to never find his soulmate, Etkatrina always thought she was damned to walk the earth alone forever. Apart these two have had a cursed existence, but together maybe they came finally see how one word can mean such an unbreakable bond.

Warnings: none at the moment

A/N: This gets deep fast, trust me @lovelynemesis and please overlook spelling and grammar.

Chapter two:

The first thing Bucky's mind was able to comprehend was the intense pain centered in the back of his skull. Opening his eyes to see the sterile white walls of a lab, anxiety and years of instinct quickly allowed him to sit up and asses his surroundings, which was a fair feet given the amount of injuries he had sustained. The first thought to register in his mind was his chosen. 

He remebered falling to the ground with her in his arms, and then blackness. " Where is she?" he slurred into the silence knowing good and well someone was monitoring him. Bucky went to sit up and remove the IV's placed in the flesh arm and the wires connected to his metal prosthectic, but as he rose it felt like he had been punched in the chest. " Wow there manchurian candidate, slow it down. Your girls fine. You on the other hand are a little worse for wear." Tony said as he entered the lab. Figures, Starks the only one with the tech to pull this off.

 Bucky glared at Tony, expecting him to elaborate more on his chosens condition, but apparently that was expecting too much from the billionare. "How is she doing?" he asked hopeful she was in better shape than he was. Tony's face seemed to darken upon the question. "Depends on your defention of okay" Tony told him honestly. Bucky stiffened at the wording of tony's sentance, dread beggining to fill his mind. " Whats wrong with her?'' 

Tony stayed silent for a moment longer, which scared him more than anything given the person he was talking too. Tony took a deep breath before turning to face him fully. "Well, for starters, she's dead." That Stament sent Bucky's mind into overdrive. Forgeting all thoughts of his preivous pain he lunged for stark, unable to stop himself from slipping into the winter soldeir fecade he tried so hard to contain. Tony retreated out of Bucky's grasp, narrowly escaping the enraged soldier. 

" Wow Wow Wow, Calm yourself, she's okay." Tony said confusing Bucky enough to slow him down. Noticing this Tony took advantage of the situation.  " She's in the room a few doors down from here. I believe there may have been  some miscommunication." Tony said in a placid manor, still backing away from a fury fueled soldeir." Actually I believe the proper term would be undead."  This made Buck stop completly and furrow his brows in obvious confusion. Tony took a cautious step foward and sratched the back of his neck nervously.

" It'll be easier to show you than trying to explain it." he admitted honestly, still not fully understanding the womans situation himself. Unable to come out of soldier mode until he was given undenialable proff she was okay, he lifted himself up off the bed, careful to avoid stretching his torso, and nodded. Tony threw him a shirt and a pair of joggers he kept in the closet, then turned to give him a little privacy. It  took longer than expected to stretch the bleached cotton material over his body , but even the burns covering his upper torso and back would not deter him. Finished with changing he turned, his silent glare being enough modevate the billionare to hurry .Wasteing  no time, Tony lead Bucky to the room where the sleeping female lay. 

When they entered the soldiers eyes examined his chosen, soaking in the details he did not have time to take in the first time he laid eyes upon her. His took in the mixed shades of her hair. If he looked close enough he could make out a little bit of every hair color, from the warm chocolate, to the specks of vibrant dark tones of black, and the chestnut strandes that lay across her cheeks, all casscading into a mess of waves across the pillow under her head.  Her face had a soft tone to it, her cheeks rounded and the perfectly shaded, her nose so small it looked like a button. Her eyes, he remembered were this beuatiful shade of hazel, a swirling vortex  of green, blue, brown, and gold, with long thick black eyelashes that seemed to draw you in. He also remembered her skin being ice cold, the shade taking on the color of snow, and looking at it know it seemed to almost glisten in the light like frost. Her lips were full and looked as soft as velvet, coated with a familar shade of rose with subtle undertones of peach., but looking at her now he saw them, two small fangs laying across the tip of her bottom lip. 

His eyes narrowed at the mask that covered her mouth and nose that seemed to be emitting a gas like substance that was keeping her subdued. Noticing the look the soldier was giving it, Tony stepped in to explain. " We couldn't penatrate her skin with any needle we had, they kept breaking. We think they used some kind of chemical agent bonded with her venom, to penatrate her skin." The soldiers eyes immdeatly went to the dots that were scattered on her arm, and he turned to Tony. Realizing his silent implication, Tony was quick to correct the soldier. " We didn't try anything beyond simple IV's. I just had Bruce swab some of her newer injection sights so we could get a little insight on how her body would react to certain things. We mixed a Class-B antisthetic with some of her venom and vaptorized it so her body could absorb it. When she woke up she went into a frenzy. From the looks of it she hasn't fed in a while." 

Tony couldn't help the laugh that escaped him. Turning to Bucky, he apoligized. " I'm sorry, It's just well, you expect this kinda stuff to be myths and fantasy, and then here she is laying right before us. I shouldn't be surprised really, not to long  ago I wouldn't have believed aliens were real, and then New York happened." Tony reasoned. Seeing that she was okay and that she was within his reach, the soldier mindset began to fade and slowly he became Bucky again. Sighing he asked tony. " When can she wake up again?" Tony looked at him for a moment, before carefully choosing each word. "We can't allow her to wake up until we can assure she can control herself. Like I said earlier, when we first returned she went into a frenzy. Her hunger has the best of her right now." 

Bucky looked at his chosen, and gently reached out to grasp her hand. " She can drink from me" Bucky offered. " I don't think so capsicle number two. We can't risk her drinking you dry. We don't know her level of control after not being fed this long." Tony said leveling the amount of gas flowing in the tubes with the tech by her bedside. " But me and bruce have a plan. We think that we can use this machine here to vaporize the blood, and let it get aborbed into her system. Just until She can feed without losing control, the only problem is the blood has to be fresh, from what I've read dead mans blood will do more harm than good.( A shout out to the one who can name this refrence) Thats why waited until you woke up. We wanted to ask you about it before we did anything. We know how important she is to you." Tony explained, watching Bucky as he looked lovingly at his chosen." Okay" Bucky agreed, looking to Tony. He hated seeing his chosen like this. He realized in that moment he didn't even know her name. That would be the first thing he would ask her when she was awake, he resolved stroking  the backside of her hand with his thumb.       

   To say he was upset was an understament. Right after he had agrred Tony called Bruce and kicked him out of the room., locking the door effectivily putting space between him and her. It hurt him for some reason, the space between them. He felt fine only moments ago when he had been holding her hand, but now all he could think of were all the ways this could go wrong. This was when Winter saw fit to make his opinon about the situation known. "She could attack them upon awakening and go into a frenzy." Winter reasoned with his logic.  " No she's better than that"  Bucky aruged with Winters instincts, trying to find a common ground, that would appease them both " Not if she doesnt have any control."  Winter reasoned  " They weren't feeding her, her first instinct is going to be to  jump the first thing she sees with a pulse." Bucky stopped seeing the logic in Winters words." Your only seeing the negative in this situation." he countered tryng to gain a more solid footing in this argument. " And your only seeing what you want to see James,  Just because she's your chosen doesnt mean she isn't dangerous to you, more so than I have ever been." He growled at Winter, lashing out at his other half

 " You don't know what your talking about, besides even if she is as dangerous as you say, Why did you come out when I thought she was gone"  .Sneering at the possiblity his emotions got the better of him, Winter calmly rationalized, " Your grief had momentarly stunned you, I took it upon myself to do what you would have had you been capable and acted accordingly, besides despite your common believe I am apart of you James, that makes her my chosen as well." Frozen at Winter revalation, he sat htere in silence for a moment, allowing winter to speak again." All I'm saying is the moment she wakes up she's going to do what any caged animal does and go by her instincts." Unable to prove him wrong bucky simpled ended the argument with " She's better than that, your wrong." 

The footsteps beside him came to a stop and a hand laid itself upon his shoulder.  " Whose wrong Buck? " Steve asked jarring him out of his head. " It's nothing Steve" he said brushing off his pals concern.  Steve furrowed his brow and took in the state of his friend, well more like brother. " It's happening again isn't it, your talking with him." Steve only wanted to help his friend, but trying to get bucky to admit he needed help was a task eaiser said than done. " I said I'm fine Steve. Let it go." Bucky said affecivly ending that conversation. It was the suddenly crash that caught both thier attention.       

 " Friday, what's going on in there, let me in." Bucky all but shouted rushing to the door when They heard bruce yell something at Tony. " I'm sorry Sergent Barnes, but Mr. Stark has ordered no one enter the room until he gives the all clear. I can however tell you the proceejure has endured an unexpected complication." Panic seizing him, he banged on the door wanting to be let in.  " What's happening Friday"  Steve asked trying to get Bucky to move away from the door. It took a minute for the A.I.'s responce. " The woman on the table seemed to have a negtive responce to the venom infused blood vapor. Mr. stark thought since that was how he had to administor the anasthedic that would also be how he got the blood into her sytem. However after a fail attempt,  Dr. Banner suggested just vaporizing the blood and letting her take it in that way. Her body has stablized as much as it can with her immune system. Which is virtually nonexistant along with most human body funtions, we are unable to estimate time of recovery, given the lack of data on the subject but Mr. Stark assures she will heal at an more acceled rate than a normal human, ten times faster than you or Sergent Barnes, Captain Rodgers."

 It wasn't too long after that the the doors to the med lab were opened to reveal a blood speckled Bruce, and a sheet white Tony. " She's awake" was all he said.

Etkatrina watched silently as two men entered the room. One she reconized immeditaly as Captain Amercia, or less commonly know Steven Grant Rodgers.( Just Steve really) The second she reconized only by the way her body reacted to his presence. It was a strong pull to be near him, to want all his attention, and to feel him hold her in his arms. This man was her chosen. She studied him closely, from the long brown hair that covered his face to the deep pits of ceurelan blue that were his eyes, to the bright shine of the vibrainium arm that attached at his shoulder. In less than three seconds she had been in his presence, and it felt like she had known him all her life. She looked down at her wrist and very softly traced her mark. " I've waited a long time to meet you, Your just as beuatiful as I always imagined " He said coming to kneel beside her bed. Silence engulfed the pair, and Etaktrina wanted to hear him speak again.          

 " Twenty says I've got you beat on the waiting part." She laughed trying to joke with him, wanting to hear his laugh. He chuckled at her attempt. " About eighty years" She smirked at him and challanged " Try two hundred". Her chosen returned her smirk and confidently replied with " You don't look a day over twenty doll." She giggled at him and retorted "Smooth". Steve came into the conversation then remarking " You should have seen him in the fourties, always such a charmer." Her brows furrowed at the thought of her chosen flirting with other women, and a small but fural grow slipped past her lips unintentionally. " Nothing serious doll"

 Her chosen told her grasping her hand and tracing her mark as if to say " promise ".She relished the first human contact she'd had in years that hadn't had harmful intent behind it. She watched him look over her face eyes stopping at the point where her fangs met her bottom lip. She looked away embaressed at what she was, that was until she felt him slip his fingers underneath her chin and turn her head towards him. " Don't be that way" he whispered softly only for her to hear. " How can you aceept me, I'm a monster, The thing parents tell thier children about at night." Her chosen simply softly smiled at her with a hidden pain in his eyes and cupped the side of her face. "We all have our pasts and in a way we're all monsters,  but you know when a monster isn't a monster anymore" He asked with glazed eyes, like he wasn't talking just about her. She knew the qoute fondly so she leaned into his touch and barly whispered " When someone loves it." He smiled at her expression. 

Eyes closd and lips barly parted head leaned agaist his palm. This was a position of trust, and she trusted him whole heartedly. " Exactly and your my chosen, you know what that means" he asked her in a faint whisper. " It means I'll love you uncondtionally; past and flaws included, and hope you'll do the same in return because I believe we were put together for a reason. I don't know what reason that is just yet, but I'm willing to take the time and find out"  He said rising to his feet and kissing her forhead, his lips ghosting her skin like a brush of wind. She sat stunned at his next words. They struck her hard, and even though her heart no longer beat she could swear it was pounding agaist her chest right now. 

" ya budu vashim zashchitnikom, vashim drugum, i lyubouniko. ya budu use chto nuzhno chtoby ya."( i will be you protector, your friend and your lover.whatever you need)  They were in her birth tounge. he spoke it clearly and with so much emotion, she would have been in tears, had she been capable of producing them. " spasibo"(thank you)  She whispered to him. " Don't thank me, I mean it I will be whatever you need me to be. ya zde`s moya malen`kiy kotenok"( im here my little kitten)  she stuck her tounge out at him for the nickname, but was otherwised touched by the statment. 

" kakiye vy zovut"( whats your name)  He asked her. " menya  zovut Etkatrina Analesia Morazovya." ( my name is...) She told him. " I ty' ( and you)he asked wanting to hear the name of her chosen as bad as he did. He smiled at her. He seemed to do that a lot around her, but she didn't mind. " menya zovut James Buchanan Barnes ". She heard Steve groan once he had hear James tell her his name. " Why didn't you tell her your nickname, Buck. You hate your name." Steve whined. She furrowed her brows and rather confidently said. " He has a wondeful name, and I will adress him by such. " Steve stood frozen for a moment before his mannars kicked in. 

" No ma'am I just ment growing up he... he hated the name James so we always called him bucky." Steve stuttered turning the brightest shades of pink. James laughed at his brothers embarassment, and smiled proudly at the amount of sass his girl packed in her. " Doll if you want to call me James, call me James, if you want to call me Bucky, call me Bucky. It don't matter to me as long as your right here beside me." Realizing how she must've sounded she quickly backstracked. " I'm sorry Steve It's just..." It was steves turn to smile." Nah, Don't apolagize Kat We all have our prefrences" She rose her brow at the new nickname and smiled. 

" Kat I like it, but I prefer Katzya over kat keeps the russian tone to it "  She said then turned to James. " Let me guess, that my new nickname" His smirk became a full blow grin and he laughed at her tone. " malen`kiy kotenok it suits you" he whispered to her.  then  turned to steve and upon remembering he didn't understand russian,  laughed at the confused expression on Steves face.   " It means little kitten" answering his brothers unspoken question. Steve cheeks turned pink again causing all of them to laugh together. It was the first time in two centries Katzya had been this happy, but she knew all good things had to come to an end.

#the winter solider x reader #the winter solider imagine #winter solider imagine #bucky barnes #bucky smut #bucky imagine #bucky x reader #bucky fluff #bucky angst #vampire #vampire reader #soulmate au

[b00bstone]

All the even numbers!

thats a lot. and 72 was repeated twice but i had to renumber them since i copied and pasted adn forgot it was repeated. but anyway. 

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

mostly shy i think but i can be outgoing if im comfortable. 

4 Are you easy to get along with?

not really. i can be quite moody. and i unfortunately have a short temper (which im trying to work on) and im depressed adn suicidal so i think the answer is no. 

6 What kind of people are you attracted to?

smart funny ones. 

8Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

my friend the nerd because i was talking to them and my friend rabbit earlier. 

10Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

probs my therapist since we talked just earlier today.

12What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

1.awkward by hailey knox

2 beautiful girl by sara barielles 

3. plot twist by sigrid

4 waving through a window from dear evan hansen 

and 5. dissapear also from dear evan hansen.

14Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yeah but my luck is shitty and miracles happen to other people. so basically yes but not for me lmao

16Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

yeah. if she were down. but like shes really straight. so i doubt she would be.

18Do you still talk to your first crush?

occasionally. hes a dick now tho. fraternity guy. and voted for trump.

20Do you like your neighbors?

well the ones i know are pretty cool. 

22Where would you like to travel?

narnia. one of those planets they discovered that are super far away but similar to earth. but like on this planet? probs travel around europe. 

24Favorite part of your daily routine?

going to bed. 

26What do you do when you wake up?

lie there and try to go back to sleep. 

28Who are you most comfortable around?

probs my friend rabbit.

30Do you ever want to get married?

one day yeah. but only if i find the right person u know. 

32Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

oohhhh ummm hmmm. chris pratt. aubrey plaza and john boyega. i feel like aubrey would bring a sarcastic element which would help with the pressure and nervousness and john and chris. well u can just see in their eyes that theyre really gentle people that will treat u right. 

34do you play sports? What sports?

hahaha no. ive always wanted to dance and/or be on a swimteam. but my lungs hate me

36Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

i think ive only told like 1 or 2 people that ive liked that i liked them. and ive liked a lot of people so yes. i have hidden that i liked someone before. many many times.

38Describe your dream girl/guy?

theyre taller than me. i dunno why but ive always liked wavy/curly hair. not blonde. or brunette. so that leaves unnatural hair color or black or red. good bone structure. theyre really smart. like they know lots of stuff academically but theyre also just generally smart u know. and they know lots of lil random facts about random things. really nice. but not in like a sugar nice way but more like sun beams when it feels like theyre warming u from the inside kinda nice. kind eyes. color doesnt really matter since i keep changing my mind. strong. but not necessarily muscular. i want them to be able to pick me up and twirl me around but not like theyve got a sixpack or anything. sixpacks are kinda weird looking tbh. wed have to have most of the same values. not too talkative but not like ALWAYS quiet. theyd prefer staying in most weekend and watchng shows but dont mind the occassional night out. theyd like the beach. because what kind of crazy person doesnt like the beach (people that dont beach right thats who). theyd also like biking and hiking and swimming. very much an animal person. not lazy. good listener. intuitive. would understand that some days i just cant fucking stand physical touch. and others i crave it in a way ive never craved anything before. and other days its kinda meh whatever. people that take interest in what im interested in because im interested in it. and whose interests are cool. because i love to take interest in things my friends are interested in but sometimes its so boring. nothing particular comes to mind. but im sure its happened. someone who doesnt check up on me when im crying. because tbh i hate it when people do that. unless its through texting or a phone call. but like people in person asking “are u ok?” while im sobbing my eyes out? fuck no go away. someone who understands that im really fucking bad with words. and sometimes me trying to say something will take a while and it may not make sense. theyd be patient. they wouldnt mock me. or be manipulative. and i think this list is long enough.

40What do you want to do after high school?

travel the world and end up famous, but not like papparazzi following me famous. famous like i appear on snl every once in a while and drop bangers or rad filsm or whatever i do and thats all.  what will i probs end up doing? crying a lot and going to community college. and applying to as many colleges as i have the energy to. 

42If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

it might mean im busy. or just listening. or really pissed off. or upset. or just have nothing to say. 

44Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

space. 

46What are you paranoid about?

everything

48Have you ever been drunk?

not yet. but sometimes i want to be

50What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

blue i think?

52 One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

everything. but like one specific thing? id like to get rid of my depression, fears, and this brain fog that haunts me

.54 Favourite store?

trader joes or target

56Favourite color?

yellow

58 Last thing you ate?

well rn im eating plain potato chips and mayo (please dont judge me. i know its disgusting)

60Ever won a competition? For what?

i used to do mma i won like one or two of those. i also run a riding competition once. 

62Been arrested? For what?

not yet. but im sure one day i will be.

64tell us the story of your first kiss?

we were in her parents bathroom and were 7. thats all i remember. havent kissed anyone since. which isnt for lack of wanting to.

68Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

i dont really have any tumblr friends that arent my real friends yet? so like i cant answer that.

70 Twitter or Tumblr?

well i spend all my time here and not on twitter so lets go with tumblr. altho i do have a twitter im never on

72Names of your best friends?

adi, heather, rabecca, joaquin, celestine. 

74What colour are your towels?

blue, red and white. and theres some hawaiin print ones and a yellow one. 

76How many pillows do you sleep with?

3... 

78How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

like 40? dont judge. i kept asking as a kid and my parents kept giving them to me for christmas and my birthday. they should have stopped. 

80What colour is your underwear?

rn its grey. but its not the only color i have

82Favourite ice cream flavor?

fuck. ummmmm coffee?

84What colour pants?

rn theyre black. but on the front of the thighs they have zebra striping. 

86Favourite movie?

thats not an easy question to answer. im gonna say bringing up baby just because. 

90Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

both? i mean i prefer mean girls a lil more bu 21 jumpstreet isnt bad either

92 Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

dory. we are both scatterbrained. 

94Last person you talked to today?

adi. but like in person? rabbit and the nerd. 

96Name a person you love?

celestine. (not romantically)

98In a fight with someone?

not as far as i know. but i always kinda feel like im in a fight with monkey. 

100How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

like 4? i know i know i dont have very many. 

102Favourite actress?

aubrey plaza. 

104Do you tan a lot?

nope. i try at least once every summer. but my skin either stays as pale as snow or i burn really bad then my skin shift to a slightly more offwhite shade of snow. 

106. How are you feeling?

blergh. potato chips and mayo are really gross. and im tired and sick of people telling me shit. 

108Do you regret anything from your past?

i regret everything ive ever done. 

110Do you miss anyone from your past?

well there is this one guy i used to talk to but i miss the attention and not him so that doesnt count. i kinda miss a friend of mine named shannon from elementary school sunday school

112Ever broken someone’s heart?

i dont think so. 

114What should you be doing?

school. but ive given up on that. so. 

.116 Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

oh yeah. ive liked 2 peoplethat much. altho i barely knew the first person and it was more me projecting my ideals of the prefect person onto them. 

118Who was the last person you cried in front of?

probs my therapist. 

120Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yeah. i was just in virginia last week. i live in california so id say thats definitely out of state. 

122Are you listening to music right now?

nope. 

124Do you like Chinese food?

americanized or traditional? americanized: yessss that shit i shte bomb. traditional? i dont know ive never had it. 

126Are you afraid of the dark?

yes. very. i need a light source or i start to panic. 

.128 Is cheating ever okay?

like on a partner or on a test or something? on a partner? no way. u should never do that. like thatll really fuck them up and make them mistrustful for the rest of their life. on a test? if its necessary sure go for it. i dont care. im not ur teacher. 

130Do you believe in love at first sight?

yeah. but its not something thatll ever happen to me lmao.

132. Are you currently bored?

im always bored. 

134 Would you change your name?

last name? yes 100% absolutely. first name? maybe. 

136Do you like subway?

like the sandwich shop? fuck no! the first time i ate it i threw up. the second time was ok. and thei third time i got serious stomach cramps afterwards. it was these awful sharp shooting pains all through my stomach. 

138Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

probs my therapist. 

140Can you count to one million?

theoretically? yes. but will i? no 

142Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed! my closet freaks me out but the office across from my bedroom freaks me out more. and also like i dont want cats walking on my face. or to wake up at 7 am and find that my dog has taken up the very middle of the bed. 

144Curly or Straight hair?

rn? mostly straight. but when it gets longer it kinda curls a  lil. 

146Summer or Winter?

yes. i like both. dont make me choose. 

148 Favourite month?

july. thats when im born so it has to be my fav. 

150Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

152Was today a good day?

no. 

154What’s your favourite quote?

in the beginning the universe was created a lot of people regard t as a bad move. and i messed that quote up. but yeah. 

156Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

the terms braided and woven refer to the structure of the elastic. 

[annoyinglynuttywhispers]

feelings 16th/17

wow youre really a villian wow he really loves you wow hes crazy wow you can't do shit youre like a sick little patient. "i know im running away from the truth" am i ever going to change? im not myself that feeling when he suggested that I should go for me since its hurting me so much, That cold empty feeling. That lets me know how much i love you. "I dont want to loose you" does it make a difference if i let you know you'll never loose me, whether were togethor or not? "salma i was just joking". You dont know what i think of myself. youre so uptight. Youre always ready. Its so unsettling. all of this is very unsettling. but im in it if you are. i believe in it if you do. But do you? Youre so sweet and bright and i feel like I dull you out. Im such a mood killer. Im so boring. This whole thing has made more the most unsure of myself then ive ever been in my entire life.. i feel like you need to take my hand and guide me through it. I dont trust myself enough to guide me.. i feel really alone. But with you its the different kind. Like youre so good and im so bad and thats whats seperating us and it hurts. i need to bring myself out of this and i need to remember the key details of what to do and what not to do. I hate trial and error so much. The uncertainty kills me. the uncertainty kills me all the time for anything really. i wonder if i need help. I never feel happy. I can laugh and smile at things. He can make them genuine. Whwn something bad happens it gets swiped away really fast, like a wax strip. It hurts longer then one though. Whenever youre upset about something or you express discomfort, it makes me feel like i disappointed you, even when sometimes it has nothing to do with me i wonder if im learning from experience or am i traumitized by it. The thought that i hurt my little ball of sunshine makes me want to cry for hours. i wonder if he knows that. i wonder if its too late to bring that up. i wonder if i need some time away from you. "If i step on your toes i feel it too" boy does that feel litterate. i want to die. I want to be alone. At the same time i dont want to be with you because i step on your toes. You said it too "anything you think is right is wrong" would it work? would i come back a better and functionable person? would i have a straight head? would i finally not be so sensitive? being sensitive is horrible. Youre like a therapist. Im like a gaping asshole, i cant keep my shit in anymore. A busted balloon that cant hide shit anymore. Anything i keep to myself destroys me from the inside. Sooner or later youre going to get sick of me telling you things. Youre going to get sick of me in general. "Im nevee going to get sick of you". Even typing to an account that no one sees makes me feel violated and vunerable. Being sensitive sucks. I could go on and on and on forever. I wonder if its because i never tell anyone anything. I miss him. Every time we leave a call i miss him. Every time somethings wrong i miss him. sometimes wanting to run away has been more frequent lately. Just to solve everyones problems. My parents could finally be happy and not worry about me by sperating because they hate eachother. He can finally be detached from me and find someone else thats good for him. No ones going to love him more than me. Let the problem solve itself? He really is adorable. His laugh is so cute and hes such a sweet heart. He gets mad at little things and he can be scary at times buy he trys. He trys so hard. His life is so hard. And you make it harder. He seems so beat up and its like you joined in with the people that did it. I wish i could tear myself down but i wonder if the guilt is doing it for me. I wonder if theres going to be a happy ending to successfully be with you, or for you to be without me and be successful You wanted to marry me, i wonder if you feel the same way..probably not that really hurts, to know i fucked up that much. Your so stupid salma, you really are so stupid. True love found you and you squashed it. Does he trust me? I dont trust him. what am i going to do. should i ever show him these? i wonder if that would help anything i always feel like everythings my fault now. I feel like my very presence makes him miserable.I wonder if ill ever help myself. I wonder if ill ever help you. was it better when i didnt care or was it only better because i never seemed unhappy? Any tiny thing makes me uncomfortable.. I dont think it was ever about school really it was always about you. am i a liar? yeah i feel better that i admitted it. i hate being vunerable in front of people. I hate being vunerable infront of you. maybe it was better in the beggining because i wasnt vunerable or as vunerable in front of you. I was more sure of myself back then. I was comfortable in my own skin. It was ok for people to be mad and it was ok for me to be mad. I had confidence in me. can i really not do anything? You dont want to lose me. To a certain point or at a certain angle, you have. Youve lost the me you first known, youve lost the girl you love to the girl that cant love herself because of all that youve proven to her and how all that she thought she could do? you said she couldnt, and thats how she lost herself and thats why she finally spoke out and thats why shes in the rut shes in and thats why she cant take care of you. maybe i do need to get away from you. People call this gas lighting. I wonder if he knows hes doing it?

[artificialqueens]

Raja's new outfit (Raja/Raven) ~ Hobnob

AN: AU where Raja gets a God complex and Raven has soft skin!!

My Dad has a bit of a God complex i think. Not all the time but when he’s doing lego he’ll make the little men do stuff like fight to the death and de-limb eachother. Once he made a houses of parlament lego model and did an all out lego election in wich he had final say over everything, proper unsettling. I leave the house whenever he starts that shit then sit outside tesco for a bit.

Anyway, set your standards lower than a limbo bar, its time to get freaky.

The room felt stuffy as Raja and Raven sat together in the now empty studio, cameras and various bits of tech facing towards them. They had just finished filming Fashion Photo Ruview, and were eager to escape the studio to grab a pint.

Raja didn’t dare look up, not after filming. The cameras did something to her emotionally. Each device felt like individual pairs of eye’s looking over Raja’s every feature, as if they were casting judgemental stares and broadcasting them to millions of viewers.

In a sense that was what Raja was doing too. She was critiquing outfits queens had put work, time and effort into, casting them aside as if they were nothing. She was in no position to take any moral high-ground when it came to judgment.

She felt like some sick false God. For Raja Fashion Photo Ruview used to feel more light, less forced. Nowadays she found herself wincing every time she uttered the words ‘boot’ from her mouth. She was shattering emotions with a single catchphrase, hurting feelings with a cheap gimmick.

A sick sick god.

Raja contemplated wether Raven felt the same sometimes. They were both equally ruthless when it came to critiquing, but she never saw that bit of hesitation in Raven. Part of Raja envied that. She kept her gaze fixed at the floor.

“Raven?” Raja spoke finally, turning towards the large green screen behind them. Hell, even the background was fake.

Raven looked up from her phone, raising a perfect brow. She looked immaculate as always, a total toot. Youtube comments seemed to agree, though people were always less than enthusiastic when it came to Raja’s looks. She used to be ’the look queen.’ Where did she go wrong?

“Ive been thinking it’s time to stop the show.”

Raven did a double take, her nude lips hanging open, her eyes a mixture of disappointment and confusion. Raja snapped her head back to the floor, biting the lower part of her lip.

“Raj I don’t understand” Raven began, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Everything’s been going fine…Is something wrong?”

Raja went tense. She scrunched her eyes for a moment as she was forced to think about all the pain she’d caused.

“Who are we to tell people what looks good and bad.” Raja balled her fists, locking eyes with Raven. “What gives us the right.”

Raven sighed, moving her hand away. Her lips thinned into a sympathetic smile. “Is that it? I thought I’d done something to upset you.” She chuckled to herself, flattening out a few stray hairs around her wig. “It’s just harmless fun raj, people know that. Beauty is subjective.”

Raja grimaced. Fun? It was anything but fun. How was she meant to toot and boot looks with all this crippling guilt. Why didn’t Raven feel the same way? Surely she felt something.

“i-i don’t look better than half the girls we judge. Im such a hypocrite.”

Raven was taken back a little bit. She paused as if considering her words. Aesthetics had always been a sensitive topic for Raja, and she wasn’t really keen about touching upon it.

“I used to be an icon Raven, you know that? A fashion icon. And here i am looking like-like…” Raja gestured to her outfit. It was a beige suit with a small stain on the corner from last nights lasagne. “This! telling other people what they’re doing wrong, just to feel better about myself.”

Raja embraced the silence that followed as Raven looked at her with concern. She needed to say that more than anything in the world. Her breathing felt erratic. After a long pause from the pair Raven finally spoke up.

“If it’s about feeling…inadequate then…lets get you a new outfit!”

A new outfit?

“The ultimate toot, maybe even a shoot?”

What Raja wouldn’t give to wear a look worthy of a shoot. She’d combust on the spot. She could almost see the youtube comments gushing over her eleganza.

The ultimate toot.

Raja was having her very own personal epiphany. She knew that a show stopper outfit would put her back in the book of legends. She’d be able to judge makeup and outfits without a hint of remorse, and even better, toot and boot again.

“Raven you always know just what to say.” Raja laughed for the first time that day. She looked up to her friend who was returning the smile.

This outfit would have to be something pretty special to rudeem herself. Something unexpected. Something…nude coloured? Raja looked over to Raven. She really was immaculate. Her face was beat for the god’s. She never managed to look stale despite wearing her makeup the same every day. Gorgeous.

“I don’t want to hear any more talk of you leaving.” Raven interrupted her train of thought, popping a mint into her mouth. “I don’t know what i would do without you.”

Raja offered a smile before patting her hand. Raven’s skin felt so smooth as her touch lingered for a little too long. Raven furrowed her brow but otherwise smiled back.

Smooth. Immaculate. God Raven was perfect.

Raja’s new outfit, needed to be made…of Raven’s skin.

“Thats enough emotions for one day, don’t you think?” Raven quipped, getting up from her chair. Raja needed to take action immediately if she was going to pull this off. Almost instinctively she grabbed her arm in protest.

“For fucks rake Raja what now?”

A pause ensued.

“Does…does this rag smell of chloroform to you?”

~

Raven groaned and reached to rub her face, only to find her hands had been restrained. Her eyes shot open as she felt her chest rise and fall erratically.

She looked down to her arms and legs, mouth agape in terror. All her limbs had been tied down with thick tulle fabric and hair. The entire scenario was odd to say the least.

She wasn’t at home.

She wasn’t in the studio either.

Raven’s surroundings were dark as her head darted around, searching desperately for any kind of answer.

“Nice of you to wake up.”

She recognised that voice anywhere. Raja Gemini.

“Raja why am i tied down? This prank is proper messed.” Raven said through shallow breaths, settling her gaze on the shadowy figure ahead of her.

“Prank? No…” Raja spoke softly taking a large step forwards, ruvealing grim contours of her face under the dim lighting. “Messed? Yeh a little lol.”

“Alright well…thats enough now just let me go.” Raven spoke with an urgent tone, giving an unconvincing smile. She noticed the glimmer of something metallic grasped in Raja’s hand. Alas, it was slightly too far out of her peripheral vision.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that Raven.” Raja deadpanned rolling a large metal table over. Raven feared the worse.

“Remember what you said earlier? An outfit worthy of the ultimate toot? Maybe even a shoot?”

“i-i may recall that yes.”

“Well i need you for that outfit Raven.”

“Like sewing tips?”

“I’m going to use your skin for my outfit.”

“What the fuck.”

Raven should of seen this coming. Who asks whether a tissue smells of chloroform. She’d been dicked over.

“You little shit i should’ve known.” Raven said, clenching her fists. “Untie me so i can knock you around.”

“SHhhhhhhh” Raja dragged a finger along Raven’s lips and smeared it around a little. “You and me Raven, we’ll go down in the year 7 history textbooks because of this.”

Raven began to sob. “How do you expect to make my flesh into fabric even i don’t think you thought this through.”

Raja brought a knife into Raven’s line of vision and grinned. “Goodnight Raven. Nevermore shall the burden of this heavy world drag you down.” She said, slowly hovering her knife over to the centre of Raven’s chest. “Any last words before i shank you up?”

“Yeah Manila should’ve wo-”

The knife was plunged. Raven’s expression softened as all life drained out of her.

Perfect. She was ready for…preparation.

~

Raja sat in the chair she always sat in.

Green screen behind her.

Cameras in front.

She grinned. The crew had entered the set moments prior and were enamoured by the craftsmanship of Raja’s outfit. Her poise, her elegance, the draping of the garment. Every move she took was her’s to control.

Raja had done it. She was a God.

Skinning Raven had been quite a task, though suprisingly satisfying. She’d dealt with network executives before, so skinning her best friend was nothing she couldn’t handle. After that it was all a matter of hems and stitches.

“Were about to…start filming…Where’s Raven?” One of the camera crew managed to choke out, never tearing their vision away from Raja’s masterful display of artistic genius.

Raja needed to come up with a classic excuse. Shit. What did they always say when one of them didn’t show up?

“She’s…sucking dick.”

All the camera crew nodded, seemingly satisfied with the answer provided.

The director gave a countdown. The cameras began to roll, casting their visions to millions of viewers. After all, what is a God if not a public figure with influence over others? The bending of wills, planting opinions and views into young minds.

None of that mattered anymore though really.

All that mattered was Raja is the ultimate toot. ~

AN: If anyone knows how much stamps cost can they message me thanks.

#hobnob #raja's new outfit #raja gemini #raven #raja x raven #tw gore #rpdr fanfiction #submission #crack fic