#steph........ is going to fuck me up for a couple of days i know that for a fact

[southern--downpour]

never has there been a character thats given me such emotional whiplash as HABIT. i both am delighted every time he shows up and also so enraged that i want to throw him in front of a bus

#i need to see him fucking mauled by the rest of the emh crew. he's probably my favorite character. #he just sucks SO bad and is SO fun to watch i hate him with my entire being #shut up virgil #ok my actual fav is probably just evan. because have you seen evan. #but habits just SUCH a fun character even if he is the goddamn worst and i want to see him dead at all costs #need vinny to run him over w/ a car like they tried to do w/ slendy #also need them to do that w/ slendy again but successfully this time i think itd be really funny to see #thats 100% been my fav moment so far btw #along w/ jeff just full on tackling a security guard #these guys are fucking nuts i love them sm #dreading the moment i have to watch them all die bc ive gotten enough spoilers to know that happens and im not gonna recover #steph........ is going to fuck me up for a couple of days i know that for a fact #even if habit eating a fucking baby is extremely funny in concept to me #cause i really love steph

[qcomicsy]

Some Nice!future au headcannons because I want to keep the ideas fresh in my head.

- Bruce is retired, Wich is insane saying this, I know right? How could he? And that's my favorite part he is retired, except he isn't actually.

He generally stays in the comm and no he doesn't care if that bothers Terry. Sometimes Terry just purposely turns his comm off, part to piss Bruce off and part to not get himself pissed off because there's a limit on how much you want your dad minding your business while your doing your job.

So Bruce stays sometimes in the comm and sometimes giving his mostly unwanted inputs on his investigations.

He doesn't get out as Batman as much as he wants to, because yeah that would get him killed but when that ever stopped Bruce Wayne honstly? And also because when he did it he almost gave everysingle one of the Bats a fucking heart attack.

Terry was so fucking confused because some goons and criminals kept telling him 'I though you were taller???' and he would get '????'

- Bruce minds everyone business as well is not just Terry, sometimes he just pop up in the other Bats comms and everyone is deeply annoyed about it, because how the fuck he keeps invading their own security system?

And it's even more infuriating because in the end of the day (most of the time) he is just extremely helpful.

Not even Oracle could keep him off her back.

- Tim is "technically" now the best detective in the world, except he isn't because Bruce isn't dead and Detective Chimps isn't either, but not many people know that.

- Gordon is happily retired thank you very much, and he can finally rest because Montoya filled for him as commissioner.

- Everything that might happen is her problem now.

- Harley is mostly retired she lives with Pamela in a farm and works as a super-people/part villains therapist from home-office.

- Harley and Pam got married.

- Jason visits Harley constantly, they bonded a lot in these past few years.

- Jason visits Harley much more often then he visits Bruce and Bruce is definitely not jealous about it even though Harley lives in literally nowhere and the Manor is right there–

- Bruce nags Jason, so much about it. He nags everyone about it. He sends a passive agressive "Alfred told me to tell you dinner is ready" message ever couple of weeks (he's lying).

Jason once told him "I really miss it when you were emotionally stunted" and Bruce just looked at him and quipped.

"You're the ones to told me to get therapy."

- Bruce doesn't actually go to therapy he gossips with Harley and they call that therapy.

Because Harley tricks him into sessions mid gossiping.

And it is in fact, better than nothing.

- Terry became Batman as an annoying 17 year old for the exasperation of every adult of the Batfamily.

- Damian and Tim we're the one's who trained him, Bruce unfortunately was hospitalized at the time (he's better now).

- Damian trained Terry in martial arts, combat and streets smart skill and Tim helped training him on how to proceed with the criminal forensics part.

- Duke and Steph kept an eye on Terry in his first months of patrol, Terry kept trying to get away from them to do whatever he wanted but Tim or Damian would always eventually catch up to him.

- That doesn't mean he stopped trying until he made all four of them age ten years of stress.

- They let him do it whatever he wanted eventually, but mostly because they knew he was ready.

- Steph just did on purpose.

- Damian rarely would actually join Terry (or any of them) on patrol because he prefers working in the shadows.

- The day Terry successfully tricked all the four of them into leaving him alone he almost had a heart attack because he immediately bumped into no one less then Nightwing and Redhood.

- Red Robin was the one to call them.

- Terry and Jason got along so quickly it's infuriating.

- Terry is a great Batman, he is skilled and witty which puts almost every criminal off rithm.

They hadn't got this that amount of stress ever since Dick's robin.

- Jason works as a literature professor in Gotham public school.

- Jason was Terry's teacher for a while.

- Terry hated it.

- Terry got to school with patrol bruises once and when Jason managed to get a hand on him he cussed him out for 45 minutes.

That's how he learned that Tim and Damian forgot to teach Terry how to hide them.

Then he cussed them out for 84 minutes holding Terry's shirt the same way you hold a wet cat.

#nicefuture!au #most of this is just general ideas I'm having so I might change it eventually as I'm getting the big picture #I'm still figuring out hor Steph Dick and Cass are living but I'm getting there #future! damian #damian al ghul #future!tim #future!bruce #future!dick #future!duke #future!steph #future!jason #future!harley #jason todd #tim drake #duke thomas #bruce wayne #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #harley quinn #pamela ivy #jim gordon #Renee Montoya #long post

[jaegersdevil]

[college] basketball!eren headcanons

guys i’m back in the waiting room (& it’s fkn hot today)……… let’s write some headcanons!!

masterlist

a few points i've made in my bf!eren headcanons:

in basketball games against certain colleges, bf!eren gets so fired up and aggressive and lippy. he talks so much shit on the court (he's known for it), and isn't afraid to take shit either (which pisses off the other team, and the whole cycle starts again). but, it's a bonus for you when he gets off the court because he's looking extra hot..... and he knows it...... asshole

you wear bf!eren's spare jersey to his basketball games

bf!eren with a chain under his basketball jersey, his hair tied back and a thin headband, tape on his dodgy shoulder......... oh lordy

bf!eren's post-game meal is 3 big macs and 2 mcchickens AND a kids nugget meal (he wants to give you the toy that comes with it because he’s cute) but don’t forget dessert!! he sips his *diet* coke as a palate cleanser and then inhales an apple pie

bf!eren gets a job coaching a kids' basketball team, and that is a canon event

now i will elaborate....

basketball!eren wears nba jerseys in everyday life with sweat shorts & dunks/vans/birkenstocks (with socks) he is an effortlessly stylish college athlete ok he can pull off anything

basketball!eren has a piece of sports tape around his wrist with your name written in marker <3 (points to it whenever he scores if you aren’t there (e.g. games on the other side of the country), otherwise his finger is on you in the crowd)

whenever his favourite team is playing (call him basic, call him a bandwagon, but my man is in love with steph curry, so you know he supports golden state) & he can’t watch at home on the tv, basketball!eren sits and watches it on his phone (warning: he will speak to the phone like the team can hear him so keep an eye on him in public, especially at the library because he will yell)

basketball!eren got mvp in sophomore year (jean was like 2 points behind him) and he holds it over jean’s head because he is cheeky and a dick

basketball!eren wears a suit to and from his games (specifically a navy one with a white shirt, no tie, and its just so rahhhhhh) with his headphones on and a large cup of black coffee

now, i don't want to expose basketball!eren here, but in his headphones, only on game days, he plays taylor swift & rihanna

basketball!eren texts you nonstop when he's on the bus/plane to games (because connie is his seatmate (he loves him to death) but connie knocks the fuck out on these trips so eren gets very bored)

basketball!eren wears his hair in 2 styles when he plays: completely tied back with a thin headband or fully out with a thin headband (frothing over here sorry don't look at me: heavy emphasis on the 2nd style though)

basketball!eren has like a couple hundred thousand followers on instagram because he's a college basketball player and he's good and hot as fuck

basketball!eren posts photo dumps once a fortnight as a wrap-up for that time period because his life is so crazy hectic that he always has content for a new dump (i wish he was real guys)

basketball!eren loves loves showing you off (private but not secret on social media) & buying you gifts (instagram stories of your wrist with the new bracelet he gifted you for your birthday)

basketball!eren gets drafted in his senior year of college :') (chooses to graduate first and then go to the nba - he wasn't studying biomedical science for nothing!!! (not that he needs it anymore.......))

basketball!eren gets rookie of the year in his first season (crying)

#eren jaeger #attack on titan x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren jeager imagines #eren jeager x reader #eren yaeger imagine #eren yaeger x reader #attack on titan imagine #eren jaeger imagine #eren yeager x reader #boyfriend!eren #basketball!eren #— ann writes!

[msfcatlover]

Yet more Reverse!Robins

(Calling back to my tags on this post, and one of the images from this one that live rent free in my brain.)

Joker gets bored torturing Jason on his own after a couple days, and sends out invites to all the other rogues (or at least, the ones he’s pretty sure won’t rat him out and end the fun) about a “surprise present” he’s working on for Batman. Steph has absolutely no interest involving herself in Joker’s nonsense, so she immediately throws it out and focuses on securing her area of the city to keep her people safe. She doesn’t think much more of it.

Six days later, Tim shows up at the door of one of her clubs. Not in costume, barely hiding his identity, hardly even armed (like, the bare minimum for walking around this part of town this late at night, and most of that is artfully hidden in his crutches & leg braces.) Aside from Damian or Bruce crashing the party to accuse Steph of stuff (that like 60% of the time she didn’t even do,) none of the Bats have ever approached Steph in an actual place of business before. She’s curious. She tells security to let him in, and show him to her table.

“Mr. Wayne,” Steph says, because fuck it, if Tim’s only going to mess up his hair and barely slap some concealer over the dark circles under his eyes, she isn’t gonna maintain his identity for him. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Tim shakes her hand, looks her dead in the eye, never glancing at her guards or flinching at his name. A proper little businessman, in a ratty band t-shirt and a pair of old jeans. “I need a favor.”

“You? Need a favor from me?”

“Yes.”

“The great Timothy Wayne?”

“I didn’t come here to play games.” Tim glares. “Yes, I need your help. Yes, it has to be you. Yes, I am out of other options. No, I am not above groveling—”

“Really?”

“Steph.”

“Don’t,” she growls back, “try to play this like we’re friends, Tim.”

Tim crosses his arms and scowls off to the side. “…Fine. We’ll keep it professional.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that. I wouldn’t be opposed to seeing you on your knees.” Tim’s eye twitches as Steph takes a sip of her drink. “What brings you to my humble abode?”

“I told you, need a favor,” Tim repeats.

“Well, that could be anything,” Steph says, rolling her eyes behind her mask.

“My little brother’s missing.”

Steph’s drink goes down the wrong way. She forces herself to swallow her cough. Steph clears her throat to mask it, and sets her drink back on the table.

Tim continues like he didn’t notice. “The police can’t find him. The Bats can’t find him. I have been leveraging every advantage I’ve got, but nobody has seen him in over a week—”

Ice slips down Steph’s spine as she remembers the invitation she’d thrown out right around a week ago.

“—but you have contacts they don’t.” Tim takes a deep breath. “I know you hate us, I know you…” His eyes flicker towards her guards. “…You’ve made your opinions very clear—”

“I should certainly hope so,” Steph mutters.

“—but whatever you think of me, or Bruce, or Cass, Duke, Damian, anybody, Jason’s innocent. He’s suffered enough.” Tim has a warning in his eyes: You’ve hurt him enough. Like she’d actually tried to kill the kid or something (if Steph wanted Jason dead, he’d be dead; honestly, she didn’t even leave any permanent damage. Her lesson was no harsher than anything any of them got on a bad patrol, she was just more open about the point she was making.) “He’s just a kid.”

“And yet, you keep letting him out into this city.”

Anger flashes across Tim’s face, but he visibly chokes it down. “I’m not having this conversation with you. This has nothing to do with Jason’s hobbies or field trips, or whether or not you approve of them. This is about a 15yr old kid, missing in Gotham City, following the biggest Arkham breakout in the last 10yrs. Are you going to help or not?”

Steph sighs, propping one elbow on the table and leaning on her fist. “What have you got for me?”

“Jason snuck out for a party nine days ago—the night of the breakout.” (Translation: Jason was in uniform, probably on patrol.) “We have a system where even if he doesn’t want Bruce to know what he’s doing, Jason still calls me to check in every 2hrs. He checked in a little before 2, because he said he was about to be ‘really busy’ and didn’t want me to worry. I told him to go home. He told me he’d be fine, that he wasn’t anywhere near the mayhem.” Tim’s expression is flat, dead. “He didn’t check in again. Nobody’s seen or heard from him since. There have been no ransom demands. Last sighting was outside of Genevieve’s in Burnley.”

The invitation arrived six days ago exactly.

Steph needs to go. Steph needs—Steph needs to find that letter, she can’t remember if it had an address or a time, she can’t—

“I’ll pay whatever you want,” Tim tells her, seemingly unaware of how Steph’s breath is caught in her lungs (remembering what it was like to be 16, tiny, and at the whims of a madman. Eight full days. Did Steph suffer that long? She doesn’t think so, but the time all blurs together under the pain…) “Money is obviously no object. Weapons? Name them. Tech? I’ll build it for you myself. I can wipe your record clean. I can keep the Bats off your back. I can—” Tim swallows. “My balance isn’t the best anymore, but if you want me on my knees, I can beg. If you need me to demonstrate my gratefulness or if you need someone to hurt, I—”

“Oh my god, STOP!” The table wobbles as Steph jumps to her feet, nearly spilling her ginger ale—but then, she doesn’t really want it anymore. Her stomach is one giant knot, and she’s really regretting those onion rings she had earlier.

“Please,” Tim says, soft and far more earnest than Steph can deal with right now. “He’s my little brother. I… it’s my fault he thought he could go out like this. If there’s anything you can do…”

Steph needs to get to her office. She needs to find that note, and if she can’t find it, she needs to find Joker’s delivery boy so she can beat the answer out of him. She steps away from the table. “I’ll get back to you.”

Tim grabs Steph’s wrist as she passes by. “Please—”

“I said, I’ll get back to you,” Steph snaps, yanking her arm out of his grip. She looks away from Tim’s wounded expression. “I can’t do anything if you’re dragging me down.”

Tim’s shoulders sag with relief. “Thank you.”

“…You owe me. Whether I find him or not.”

“Thank you.”

Steph walks away. She doesn’t look back.

(She shoots Joker in the throat, grabs the nearest heavy object—curved & metal, but much else doesn’t register—and beats the clown’s head in while screaming insults in League dialect. She strips down to her suit’s under layer to keep Joker’s blood away from Jason, tossing her gloves away without caring about fingerprints, and kneels down in front of Jason, making herself as small as possible. She undoes the bonds, checking his injuries, and when Jason collapses into Steph’s arms, she holds on. Steph cradles Jason in her arms, helps him rehydrate from her water bottle, and apologizes in every language she knows for not being there for him sooner.)

(Without the mask or the armor, with Steph’s hair pulling wild & sweaty out of its braid, she doesn’t look nearly so much like the villain who hurt him before. Jason wonders if he’s dead or dreaming, to finally have the hero he looked up to for so much of his childhood decide he’s worth saving after all.)

(Steph would go to the ends of the earth to protect him from that point forward. When questioned, she just mutters something about not “letting all that work go to waste.”)

#reverse!robins #reverse robins #reverse robins au #reverse batfam #Reverse Robins AU Steph #reverse robins AU Tim #red hood steph #red hood stephanie #red hood stephanie brown #red hood!steph #red hood!stephanie #red hood!stephanie brown #oracle!tim #oracle tim #oracle Tim drake #oracle!tim drake #stephanie brown #steph brown #tim drake #timothy drake #batfam #batfamily #bat family #bat fam #batman #my writing #mine #// #OH BOY #I GOT CARRIED AWAY ON THIS ONE

[greazyfloz]

MISS GIRL YOU HAVE BECOME MY FAV ACCOUNT OMG!!!

Unfortunately I have fallen under Michael Bunting’s spell so can I request something angsty “you win, I’m done” with him ?! 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Hope you have a great day/evening <3

OMG I'M LITERALLY IN LOVEEEE WITH BUNTS!!!

Angst: 26. "You win, I'm done with this" w/ Michael Bunting

Two Years

Michael and I met when I first moved to Toronto a little over two years ago. It was almost like love at first sight because we Started dating around a month or two later. One thing about Michael, as he gets heated very easily on the ice, luckily, I have never experienced this. Michael firsthand.

Today was our two year anniversary and I already know that Michael forgot. I don’t know how he could’ve forgotten since last week. He told me that he was going to take me to the nicest places in Toronto for dinner after his game.

All day he said nothing to me about our anniversary, and I was going to hold off on saying it first. As he made his way to the door, I followed him, and he turned to press a kiss on my lips.

“Okay, bye babe. Love ya“ he says, as he gets to shut the door.

“bye Mikey, and oh yeah, happy anniversary to you too” I tell him that he stops from closing the door and re-opened it

“oh my God” he says, seeing I wasn’t amused, “fuck”

“it’s fine. See you after the game“ I say to him. He pulls out his phone to check the time.

“fuck, I’m already late” he says under his breath, “I’ll make it up to you I promise”

Even leave, shutting the door behind him, and I make my way up to our room. I open the closet and grab my leather pants and a white leafs jersey with his last name and number on the back.

After I’m ready to go to the kitchen and heat up something quick before receiving a text from Steph saying she was here. I take a couple of bites before realizing I wasn’t very hungry, then throwing it out and making my way out to her car.

“hellooooo” she says, excited to see me

“Hey” I say back trying to sound as excited

“wait, what’s wrong? you look sad”

She pulls out of our driveway and begins driving into the city.

“no reason to be sad, it’s Mike and I’s two year” I say, then look at the window as I hear Steph gasp

“he did not forget”

“he did”

“oh, my god no way. What an ass”

“oh, but he said he’ll make it up to me” I say, looking back at her as we drive through the busy streets of Toronto, “I really don’t wanna go to the game tonight”

“I don’t blame you” she says she turns into the parking garage.

We made our way into our seats with the rest of the wags. Steph was telling everybody that Michael forgot about her anniversary just out of the conversation we were having.

As the game went on, I noticed Michael was not having it. The team was losing and they were currently playing the Oilers who are typically a pretty tough team. I usually hold my breath whenever he plays the more rough teams because I know one day he’s gonna do something so stupid and possibly get himself hurt.

“I seriously cannot watch this“ I say to Gio’s wife and she giggles a little

“oh, I thought you’d be used to it by now“ she laughs

“how could I get used to that?“ I say, in a silly tone as a couple of the other wags laugh along.

Then his neck shift came. And I knew something bad was gonna happen when Kane was trying to get physical with Auston in front of the net. I watched my boyfriend skate around all the other players in front of him to jump on the player, taking them both to the ground.

“oh, boy“ I say, as I stand to try and get a better look across the ice.

I watch my boyfriend, get up from the ice after the refs pull him and Kane away from each other. I shake my head as I sit back down in my seat as he was put in the box.

When the next period came along, the game became more physical for all players. He really stood out as being the angriest player on the ice as I watch him, have a meltdown mouthing off of the other players.

The game ends, and some of the wags already go down. I said with Steph and Johnny’s wife and kids before we made our way down to ice level.

When we go down there, Michael and Mitch were already out chatting with some of the other players and their wives as he waited for me. When they noticed us, Mitch went right up to Steph giving her a hug and I walked over to Michael.

He wrapped his arms around me, but only quickly giving me a hug before pulling away. “oh, so now you can’t even act like I’m a good boyfriend?” he says quietly to me as he pulled away.

“what?” I ask and he ignores as he looks back up with the group.

“all right guys. We gotta head out now“ he says turning around and I follow him as we walk towards his car. He doesn’t say a word to me the whole way there. I’m thinking it must be because of the game and he’s taking it out on me which isn’t like him.

“Jesus y/n. I forgot our anniversary I know I’m sorry. but why the fuck are you going around telling everybody?” he says looking at me as soon as we shut our doors to his car, ” I told you I’d make up for it”

“I told Steph. And then she brought it up in a conversation we were having with the rest of the wives. So go fight with Steph about it” I say, rolling my eyes at him

“No! I wanna fight with you about it!” He yells at me

I laughed dryly before looking back at him, “just drive“ I say to Michael and he angrily throws the car into drive, stepping on the gas and speeding home.

We make it home, and I walk into the house, slamming the door behind me. I hear Michael re-open the door and enter.

“what the fuck?!” he yells out, and I turn around and open my mouth to say something back, but he beats me to it, “I forget a fucking anniversary, and you start acting like a psycho?! Seriously what the fuck is wrong with you?!” he yells at me and I feel the tears begin to form in my eyes. I lift my hand up to brush underneath.

“oh, for fucks sake’s you’re not actually gonna cry?!” he continues yelling

“yeah, I am” I yell back

“holy fuck, grow the fuck up and stop acting like a two-year-old! Are you still mad that I forgot about a stupid anniversary?! Huh?” he yells even louder than before making me shake a little before the tears really start streaming down my face, “stop fucking crying! I don’t know what game you’re fucking playing but I don’t wanna play“

“you win, I’m done with this” I say, quietly before, turning and locking myself in our bedroom. I walk over to the closet and grab a bag to put a few things in to last me until he goes on the road again. I hear him banging on the door, followed by a couple curse words.

As I get closer to the door I can make out what he saying better.

“what do you mean you’re fucking done with this?“ I hear him on the other side of the door. Fear takes over my body as I reach for the door handle and decide not to turn it. I take a couple steps back and just look at the door.

“open. The door.” I hear him say again as the door knob twists, “I just wanna fucking talk. We’re not over Because I forgot about our anniversary.“

With that, I open the door quickly, and he looks at me and he opens his mouth probably to yell at me, but I beat him to it this time, “no, we’re over because you’re acting fucking crazy”

“how the fuck am I acting crazy you’re the one breaking up with me because I forgot an anniversary“

“do you even realize anything you’re saying?” I say, finally brushing past him as I make my way to the door.

“Wait, you’re actually leaving?” he says, as he finally sees the bag under my arm

“yes Michael, goodbye”

#michael bunting #Michael bunting x reader #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #nhl writing #nhl fanfiction #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #hockey writing

[the-alice-of-hearts]

DickTim Week Day 4: AOB

Rated Mature, 1150 words, while no archive warnings would apply these would be my warning tags: omegaverse, talk of mpreg but no actual mpreg in fic, alcohol mention, hangovers, mentions of drunk texting.

Posting a couple days late for @dicktimweek but I think I'm almost done with today's entry so it'll be on time!

“Fuck… fuck, fuck, fuck!” Tim rolled out of bed to pace across his room while continuing to check his phone. “Oh fuck.” 

“Uh, Tim, buddy? Wanna slow down and tell us what happened?” Steph asked from where she was sitting up on his bed. 

“What happened? What happened? You know what happened! You were there!” He stopped to stare at her. “Why didn’t you take away my phone after we did shots?!” He demanded. 

“Wouldn’t let us,” Cass grumbled and grabbed the blanket that Steph had moved off of them. “Sleep now, food later.” 

The other omega settled into Steph’s lap and started to snore again. 

“I drunk texted Dick!” Tim snapped and that woke Cass back up and got both girls looking at him. “Why would I do that???” 

Cass sat up and groaned. “Food first, then feelings.” 

“Well, I would love to go out on a date with him! But I already poured out all my feelings to him last night.” He hissed. 

Steph threw his pillow at him. “She means for us, idiot. Give me your card and I’ll order delivery, I am not taking you out when you can smell the distress coming off of you from a mile away.” 

Tim felt his face heat up and then started digging around for his wallet before tossing it to her. “Use the purple one, I’ll go shower. There’s water in the fridge.” 

He walked to the shower and then froze when his phone chimed with an incoming message. Quickly turning on the water he checked it, it was a message from Dick and he dreaded opening it knowing what he had sent last night.

Hope you’re feeling okay this morning. Need anything for the epic hangover you probably have?

Tim hovered his thumbs over the keys and finally gave up on sending a message back. He needed a shower and some water before he thought about talking to his long-time crush after confessing his feelings for the alpha. “Ugh! Stupid!” 

---

Tim was settling down to eat breakfast with Cass and Steph when there was another knock at the door. They all looked at the door and then back to one another before Steph got up to check it. “You expecting anyone, boyfriend?” 

Tim shook his head and watched her open the door. “Oh thank god he’s not alone.” Dick’s voice drifted into the apartment. 

“Hey, Dick!” Cass called from the table inviting him in. “Want some pancakes?” 

Tim kicked Cass under the table and glared at her. She turned to stick her tongue out at him. 

Dick looked around when Steph got back to her seat and then looked straight at Tim. “Sorry, I know you guys are probably recuperating from last night. I was just worried when Tim didn’t answer my text this morning.” 

“Uh, yeah, sorry. I was in the shower and then food was here when I got out.” Tim couldn’t keep eye contact and kept looking back at the table. 

“Welp! This is totally not awkward!” Steph stood up and grabbed Cass by the hand. “See ya later Tim-tam, let me know if you need anything.” 

The girls were out of the apartment before Tim could say anything to stop them leaving him with a wink and a lear on Steph’s part and a thumbs up from Cass. 

“Have you drank water?” Dick asked from much closer than he had been before. 

Tim turned to look at the alpha and nodded. “Yeah, drank a bottle when I got out of the shower.” 

“Good,” Dick responded and then moved in closer to Tim. “I have some questions.” 

Tim sighed and looked down at his hands. “Yeah, that makes sense. I said… a lot last night.” 

Tim heard Dick pull Steph’s chair over so he could sit right next to Tim. “You did, and I know you, so I know that it’s likely if I didn’t track you down this morning then you wouldn’t let me near you at all for months until I quit asking about it.” 

Tim shook his head and picked at his eggs. “Wouldn’t have taken months.” 

Dick chuckled and carefully pulled Tim’s free hand into his own. “You’re right, but it would have been unstable.” 

“Ask your questions,” Tim said in a small voice. 

“Did you mean it?” Dick asked carefully. 

Tim winced and kept his attention on his plate. “I- well I- it’s-”

“Omega, look at me,” Dick commanded him and Tim was compelled to look at his chosen alpha. “Don’t try to explain it away, just yes or no, did you mean it?” 

Tim swallowed and gave a jerky nod. “Yes.” 

Dick trailed one of his hands up Tim’s arm. “All of it?” 

“Yes, alpha.” Tim whimpered when Dick lightly tickled the inside of his elbow. 

“You want me?” Dick asked again.

“Dick, I want you more than sober me can explain,” Tim admitted. 

“Try to,” Dick whispered, leaning in closer. 

Tim thought about it for a second and then looked at Dick’s eyes, they were warm and open and loving, and maybe this would be okay. He took a shaky breath and started. “I crave your scent, even when I’m not in heat. I want to be near you and to make you smile makes me so insanely happy. I light up when you laugh at one of my jokes because I know that you’re pleased with me. When I smell other omegas on you I want to cover you in my own scent and make you smell like mine. When I am in heat all I can think about is the one emergency heat cycle that you spent taking care of me. I want you to claim me, and mark me up, I want you to make me smell so much like an owned omega that the board members gag on it. I want to have you in my nest for every heat and I want you to pump me full of pups.” 

Dick smiled at him and placed a hand on Tim’s cheek holding his face still. “If you have no objection, I’m going to kiss you now.” 

Tim stared into his eyes. “I need you to be sure. I can’t be a fling, not with you.” 

Dick brushed a thumb under Tim’s eye. “Babybird, you have no idea how many nights I have stayed awake wishing to hear those words from you. Every time you came over I wanted to take you to my den and have my way with you. I want to feed you and provide for you, I want to see you be the dam to my pups and help me train each of them to be tech geniuses and acrobats combined into one. Tim, I want you so badly, and reading your drunk texts just confirmed that for me. Please let me kiss you, please let me claim you.”

#dicktim #dicktimweek2023 #dicktimweek #my writing #alice writes #omegaverse #omega Tim Drake #alpha Dick Grayson #Steph is also an alpha and Cass is an omega and they are a bonded couple

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

OHSHCAU (Keysmash)

Part 3

Prev

You know how, when the school year starts up, a teacher might get everyone to go around the room and give a couple of vague facts about themselves? Or, even worse, they might split everyone up into teams based on some random, inconsequential factors and they would all be forced to work together on some dumb task? That way they can get to know new people better?

You know how everyone hates that?

Yeah. Marinette thought that, of all people, her fellow high schoolers would understand. But alas, here she was, glaring down Dick because he wanted to do a team-building exercise. Bastard. She was going to shoot him.

With a paintball gun! Because they were playing paintball!

Do not send cops her way! She will introduce neurotoxins to your system!

Anyways, she had no choice but to agree. Debt’s a bitch.

And, maybe, the idea of shooting the Waynes point blank in the face with paintballs would have swayed her regardless, but who knows. The option was never truly given to her, so who’s to say how she would have reacted?

Certainly, the Waynes would never know.

Which was probably for the best. They could end her life in a couple of phone calls.

She hummed as she absently messed with her paintball gun. They had been split off into pairs. Steph was still on the bench thanks to her copious amounts of injuries, unfortunately, so Marinette hadn’t particularly minded who she was going to end up with (she hated all of the Waynes equally, save fucking Tim, who would avoid her, anyway), and had allowed them to all pair off and leave her with the leftovers.

She was regretting that, now, of course.

Dick wrapped his arm around her shoulders and tugged her into his side. “Don’t get too competitive, please?” He said, and he sounded like he was one more ‘fuck you’ away from begging.

She glanced over his shoulder and found Tim making faces at her behind his back. He was supposed to be heading to one of the other nondescript, frankly unnerving steel tunnels that would lead them to a random place on the map. He should be spending this time with Damian so they could discuss their plans. He was not doing any of these things. He had followed Marinette and Dick to their room instead, and she would be concerned about him trying to figure out where they would end up for the sake of a tactical advantage… but, frankly, that was too smart for him.

He had no good reason to be here. How sweet of him to want to see her off.

She looked back at Dick, her eyes gleaming. “Of course I won’t. Only babies get competitive over stuff like this.”

Tim bristled. But his mic was on, so he was unable to say a word in protest. He could turn his face away from the people to mouth the curses he so clearly wanted to scream, but she could just look in another direction.

Her lips twitched into a kind of grin before she tamped it down.

Dick sighed. Deeply. “I’m guessing I can take that as a no.”

“Aw. You know me so well.”

He snickered. “Well, I’d hope so, since I hired you.”

“No one has ever lied to the people hiring them ever,” she said, nodding sagely.

He grinned. “Which is why we went with… atypical hiring practices.”

“You’ve basically kidnapped me and decided to hold my entire future ransom to make me work for you.”

“Shhhhhhhhh.”

She narrowed her eyes at him.

“Oh, Marinette,” a voice called, and she was more than happy to let Steph drag her out from under Dick’s arm, even if this meant that a new arm was wrapped around her waist and a face came to rest close to her own.

Marinette raised an eyebrow, but wasn’t too surprised at the sudden closeness. They’d literally slept together, in the same bed, for days. She could handle a little bit of contact. And, besides, they’d both agreed that it fit their characters (a playful flirt would flirt with a girl next door, and a girl next door would blush and let it happen) and it would draw in more customers. Teenage boys and gay teenage girls would both rather enjoy watching ‘wlw content’ when given the option.

Besides, who doesn’t flirt with their friends a little? Now they got to monetize it. A win.

Marinette rested a lazy arm over Steph’s shoulder, careful not to jostle the microphone hovering by the girl’s chin. She gave it a pointed look, and Steph mouthed the word ‘off’. She untensed a little. “Hey, what’s up?”

“Your mic is off.”

“I didn’t get one,” she said, shrugging.

Steph blinked. “Oh. I can give you mine.”

“Well, if I accept that, how am I going to insult Tim without the audience knowing?”

Dick snickered. “You could try not insulting him.”

Marinette gave him a blank look.

He shrugged as if to say ‘well, I tried’. Which, did he really?

But her attention was quickly stolen away when Steph pulled something out from behind her ear and then presented it to Marinette, who looked at it how one might look at a dead rat their cat had just brought in.

“What the hell is that?”

“A mic,” Dick offered.

She glared at him out of the corner of her eyes, and then snapped her attention back to Steph when the girl leaned in to fit the device over her ear. “You’re not putting that on me.”

“What, is the scientist scared of technology?” teased Dick.

She gritted her teeth. “Chemicals are easy to understand. They’re predictable. This? Unreliable. Who knows who's listening in on those wavelengths.”

There was a beat of silence. The two Waynes looked at each other for a moment, something unreadable on their faces.

And then Dick sighed. “Listen, you know how our dad bankrolls the Batman?”

She nodded, still eyeing Steph as if the girl was going to jump her and attach the evil machine to her by force.

“Well, we get a couple of perks. Like this. If anyone tries to hack into these – which, really, why would they? – Batman will be alerted and I’m sure they will never be heard from again… or whatever it is he and his weirdo kids do.”

“Local Batman proves that all cops are corrupt,” she said, still eyeing it warily.

“Not a cop,” said Steph.

“Not corrupt,” said Dick.

She wasn’t sure who was being less realistic.

And it didn’t matter what they said, either way.

Batman was exactly the person she was trying to avoid, thank you very much. But it wasn’t like she could just say that, because being openly wary of the Batman in front of rich people was just begging for them to be suspicious of you. They were too used to their peers being affiliated with the Court of Owls. So, reluctantly, she let Steph place the mic.

The girl drew back slightly once she was sure everything was in place (and, more importantly, that it would stay in place even while they were all running around).

Steph grinned. “There. Done. All you’ve got to do now is press the button and you’ll be live. Anyways. Blush like I said something suuuuper hot, m’kay? They’re staring.”

“Maybe if you do something hot, I will.”

She hummed thoughtfully before she brought her free hand up to cradle Marinette’s face. She tilted her head up, her thumb caressing her cheek, their noses brushing. A quiet click sounded next to her ear as her headpiece was turned on.

“Fixed,” Steph said. Quiet, but close enough to the mic hovering by Marinette’s chin for their audience to hear.

“Thanks,” Marinette mumbled. Thank god she had melanin to hide the reddening of her face somewhat, but she was pretty sure it was obvious regardless.

“Anytime,” Steph teased, going so far as to press a kiss to Marinette’s nose before drawing back. She glanced at Dick. “Your mic is off, too.”

“What, not going to fix mine for me?” Dick joked, lifting a lazy hand to flick the knob by his ear.

Steph snorted. “I’d rather die.”

Dick grinned and immediately tugged Marinette closer to him again. Woe is her. If only she could retaliate by beating his ass like she so wants to do. She hates debt. Thankfully, he didn’t wrap an arm around her this time, instead he let her go in favor of crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re just jealous that you don’t get to teach this sweet little underclassman the ropes.”

Marinette was fighting a valiant battle with her face, trying to keep the unimpressed annoyance off of it. “You’re so kind.”

“Of course! It’s my job as the club leader to make sure that your introduction to the group goes smoothly!”

They wouldn’t be bothering with all of this otherwise.

For you see, a large part of being a Host was based around how physically attractive you were, and if they wanted her to be popular enough to pay off her debt, they would have to introduce her to the potential customers in a way that would draw their attention in that way. So, it had been decided that Marinette’s official introduction should be some kind of physical activity. Especially since their clients were all fellow teens, and likely would see a bunch of people fighting for their lives in slightly skimpy clothes and go ‘ooooooooooh’.

Steph rolled her eyes so hard she must have seen her brain back there. “It would have been easier if we’d just done a pool party.”

“My! A pool party?! Steph, have you no shame? What about her innocence?!”

“Dick. She’s wearing a crop top and yoga pants.”

“A crop top, yoga pants, and tasteful armor,” said Dick. His attempts at defending her honor were… definitely attempts. Marinette could give him that.

Marinette crossed her arms over her chest, grinning. “Would you prefer I work out in a hoodie and sweats?”

“Well,” said Steph. She brought her hands up to press against her own chest, winking. “I don’t want that.”

A glance up at the crowd showed that the people had caught the jist of what she’d said thanks to the overdramatic body language she had opted for. Thankfully. Marinette wasn’t sure how to naturally repeat that for the sake of the people watching.

Her eyes caught on one particular person in the crowd, though.

Fu, leaning against his cane heavily, watching her.

“Alright, Steph, stop flirting with the new recruit,” Dick said, slinging his arm over Marinette’s shoulders again, tugging her closer to his side. “Shoo. Scram. Other synonyms that start with ‘s’. I need to teach her how to shoot – shoot! No, wait, I’m thinking of ‘shoo’, and I’m pretty sure I already said that. Anyways. Leave so I can teach her.”

Marinette’s head jerked around to look at him, her eyebrows disappearing behind her hairline. “I know how to shoot. You just…”

She pointed her paintball gun at a nearby wall and pulled the trigger. A disappointed look crossed her face when, despite the gun clicking to tell her that the trigger was working, nothing came out.

“Hm,” she said, eloquently.

He snickered. “Well, I know why that happened, but before we fix that…” He reached a hand out to adjust her fingers. “Let’s not keep our fingers on the trigger. Unless you want to shoot at anything that dares to surprise you.”

Marinette absolutely wanted that. Unfortunately, she couldn’t say that while in character, so she was stuck smiling and saying, “Thanks, Richard.”

“Dick,” he corrected lightly, as usual.

“You don’t understand how much I can not call you that,” she said. Even if Dick was, often, a dick, and she didn’t usually mind going with whatever nickname or name someone called themself, it’s hard to say the word and still come across as demure.

“Well, then, you can call me something else. How does ‘my liege’ sound?”

Marinette snickered into her hand. “Terrible, King.”

“Oh. Hate that.”

“Got it, Queen.”

He sighed.

“Themporer?” she tried, batting her eyelashes.

“How many of those do you have?”

“So many, gender nonspecific monarch.”

“That one feels like a stretch.”

She shrugged. “Yeah, it is a bit of a mouthful.”

“You know, I’m starting to realize that you use humor to stall.”

Marinette’s face flushed at the direct callout. That had been unnecessary. And she couldn’t even curse him out for it. She hated life.

Whatever. She’d roll with it (not like she had any other choices). She gasped, pressing a hand to her chest. “What do you mean? I was trying to figure out your royal-title-specific pronoun preferences! I had only the best of intentions.”

“Of course, of course. Pretend to get ready to shoot your gun.”

Marinette huffed, mumbling that he was ‘no fun’ as she lifted her paintball gun.

He walked around her slowly, knocking his foot against the inside of her own until she moved them to be shoulder width apart, bending her arms so the recoil wouldn’t hurt as much, bending her knees slightly so she wouldn’t fall over at the lightest of hits…

“You sure know a lot about this,” Marinette said, eyeing him warily.

“Dad made me take some self-defense classes after I got held for ransom for the eight and a half-th time.”

“Eight times is a lot but I guess that’s still surprisingly competent for hi – wait, half-th?”

“Yeah!” he said, and then did not elaborate.

She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting.

He checked her form one last time before nodding to himself. He squinted at her gun for a moment, before cringing.

“I – uh – I’m not used to turning off the safety from an outsider’s point of view…”

“Then here,” she said, starting to stand up straighter and hand it over to him, only for him to rapidly shake his head.

“No, no, no, we need you in that position for as long as possible to get your body used to it.”

Marinette fought back a grimace, her eyes briefly flicking to the people still watching them intently. Dick, as the self-proclaimed ‘king’ of the Host Club, was easily the most popular among guests. She did not want to put a target on her back by looking like she was trying to come onto him. Or because it might look like he was coming onto her. She hated this fucking job. They were coworkers, damn it. She shouldn’t be stressing about getting, like, Court of Owls-style assassinated for being near him!

“Just – just… do it quick,” she said.

He nodded sharply.

Arms wrapped around her from behind, a chin coming to rest upon her shoulder. Warm breath just barely wafted over the side of her neck, earning a few goosebumps. His hands ghosted over the back of her own, briefly, fixing the positioning of her fingers once again (he really didn’t like her tendency to hang onto the trigger, apparently) before flicking the safety off.

He pulled back the second everything was in order, hands up like he was already actively surrendering. They sent the people watching them mildly embarrassed looks. It isn’t doing them much good, though.

Quick! Take legitimacy away from the intimacy!

“I need to stop bringing desserts from home, you’re getting heavy.”

Dick spluttered. “What?”

“I said what I said.”

She would apologize later.

… wait, would Babs count mental damage as adding to her debt?

She was going to apologize so profusely later.

Dick sighed, running a hand through his hair, briefly pushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Tell me why we made you the girl next door again?”

“Out of ideas,” Marinette said.

“Right, right. Any chance we can change it?”

“Well, you’re the king and all, you can choose,” she said, before winking and blowing a kiss to the people up on the viewing platform. “But, hey, everyone knows that most ‘harsh’ people are just hurt people trying to protect themselves from more harm. I’m sure that, with the right person, I could actually be the soft, kind person I portray. After all, every act needs at least a little bit of truth to work, right?”

She glanced at Dick out of the corner of her eyes. He gave the barest trace of a nod.

Good.

She had a bit of a reputation in the school. Not really because she was outright mean to people – she would never say half the shit she said around Adrien and the host club members to people she didn’t know, not without good reason – but because pretty much every student knew about her… antagonistic relationship with Tim. Because during the last finals season they had only been a step above fistfighting in the middle of the hallway. And not even because they had been scared of punishment or expulsion, but instead because Duke and Steph had physically dragged Tim away before he could jump at her.

Whatever. It was totally water under the bridge and she definitely didn’t want him dead anymore.

(Yes, Tim and Marinette could just put aside their differences, and show that they had changed… but Marinette would rather just kill him, to be honest.)

Regardless, it would be hard to convince the general population that the person that had almost fought another member was all that shy and kind. So, they needed to rework her image. Recontextualize her personality.

Whether or not Marinette or any of the other host club members really believed what she was saying didn’t matter, all that mattered was that their guests believed it. Thankfully, they had years worth of toxic media to back up their claims, and the rich kids who had never had real reason to distrust what they’d been told fell for it hook, line, and sinker.

Great. The goal for today is done. Now, if only she could get out of this stupid paintball tournament. She has changed her mind. A chance of shooting Tim in the face is not worth having to simulate a battle.

Maybe if she annoys Dick enough he might just call it off?

She watched him out of the corner of her eyes as they continued down the hallway. He caught her stare and, instead of being confused or upset or uncomfortable, sent her a tiny smile.

Yeah, she didn’t think it would work. You can’t annoy someone with as many younger siblings as he has. They are immune to outside annoyances by this age, she is pretty sure.

There’s no getting out of this.

She almost laughed. Story of her fucking life.

Dick rested his hand on the doorknob, glancing back at her.

“Ready?”

She flashed a wink. “As I’ll ever be.”

Their door opened up into what seemed to be a trench, carved into the ground. Once they had clambered out of the trench, their clothes already stained with dirt (at least she didn’t have to pay for any of it), they found themselves in a heavily wooded area, with a couple of concrete structures dotted around.

She walked to a nearby tree. All of them looked long dead, blackened, as if they had been burned. As if this was a real battlefield.

She rapped her knuckles against it lightly, and wasn’t surprised to find that, whatever it was made of, it wasn’t organic material. Judging by the sound, she would guess styrofoam, paper mache, paint, and a dream.

A quick check of one of the structures revealed it to have no ceiling.

The entire world around them was fabricated to give the people so far above them, standing on the glass and peering down at them with excited grins she didn’t want to look at, a good view of what was going on. No leaves, no roofs, nothing was allowed to take away from their fun.

Oh shit, she thought. This is what it feels like to be in the Hunger Games.

Or to be in one of Riddler’s escape rooms, she supposed.

She watched Dick carefully toeing at the dirt, checking to see how far down it went. Whether it could actually be used as padding, or if the metal hidden beneath would give some nasty bruises if someone fell on it for any reason. Such as dramatically falling over when shot ‘dead’.

Her lips twitched into a wry kind of grin. And he’s supposed to be the ‘dumbest’ one. Who does he think that he’s fooling?

It wasn’t until long after he had confirmed that the ground was, in fact, soft enough for them all to drop dead on without issue, that an alarm alerted them to the fact that the grace period was over, and they were now supposed to be hunting each other to the death.

Marinette brushed her bangs away from her eyes, taking advantage of the opportunity to see how the audience had dispersed themselves. They were, largely, grouped into four spots. No guesses why. Sureeeeeely not because this was where the four pairs of competitors were…

Okay, that wasn’t fair to the customers. There was no way for them to know that the glass wasn’t a one way mirror like they’d been told. They shouldn’t be aware of the fact that this was all a play that had been planned out well in advance. The Waynes weren’t the types to let on that they weren’t quite as ‘airheaded’ as they often portrayed themselves to be, for whatever reason.

Still… Marinette stretched lazily, rocking back and forth on her feet, trying not to laugh aloud at just how obvious they were all being.

“So, are we heading to the center or skirting around the edges?” she asked.

“Center,” he said, because that was where most of the male clients were, and therefore where Babs and Cass were likely to be. “Let’s see whether there’s a Hunger Games-style cornucopia or something.”

Marinette clicked her tongue lightly. “You can’t tell people what we’re ripping off.”

“I think they already know.”

She huffed, but it’s not as if she genuinely cared.

Without further ado, they were off.

*****

They happened across Babs and Cass in the middle. They seemed to be doing the same thing that Marinette and Dick were, picking around for anything that might be useful. As if the people who had made this place would make an entrance in a spot where they had special items.

“Find anything?” Dick asked, pointing his gun at Babs.

Cass retaliated by pointing her gun at him. He did not seem particularly pleased about this development.

Marinette wasn’t pleased, either, because this meant she had to point her gun at Cass in retaliation. Fuck this script for making her defend Dick Grayson of all people.

Their guests looked to Babs, expecting her to point her gun at Marinette and complete the circle, leading to a dramatic standoff…

Only for Babs to hold up her hands in the universal sign of surrender. “We don’t have to fight,” she said. “It’s better if we don’t. We can’t have Jason or Tim’s teams winning.”

If nothing else, Marinette had to admit that this strategy would have probably worked on her and Dick even if it wasn’t scripted. Because fuck Tim Drake. And, in Dick’s case, Jason, in particular, cannot win, because he would be insufferable about it. They would both take shady deals in a heartbeat if it meant that the other two teams wouldn’t win.

“What do you get from this?” Marinette asked, because it was expected of her.

Cass shrugged. “Fun.”

Valid reason. Marinette (and Dick, too, though she loathed to admit it) could sometimes be fun.

As for Babs…

“If we’re the last two teams, I want to shoot Dick in the face.”

Dick gave a screech of offense, complaining about his ‘beautiful face’. But Marinette sees now downsides! They shook on it before he could get a word in edgewise.

“Alright, team, let’s roll out,” said Babs.

“Don’t I get a say in this?” Dick whined.

“No. We are misandry-ing,” Marinette informed him.

“Perfect. Us girlies have to stick together,” Babs joked lightly.

“True. Can’t wait to kill ‘my liege’ for the sake of women everywhere,” Marinette said, snickering to herself.

Dick snorted at the ‘my liege’ callback, and then seemed to process what she had said. He pressed a hand to his chest. “Excuse you, I’m a girlie, too.”

“Woo, slay queen,” Marinette deadpanned. And then she frowned to herself. “Is ‘my liege’ a gendered term?”

“I… think so?” said Babs. The grammar rules for royalty is not the kind of thing the average teenager is looking up, after all. And, if Babs doesn’t know, then Cass (ESL speaker) and Dick (a liar pretending to be the ‘dumb one’ in a group already known for being stupid) had no shot. Pain. She must live without knowing for the next few hours. Why does god hate her so? Truly, she has suffered more than Jesus.

… perhaps it is jokes like that that make god hate her.

Whatever. She did not believe in Him, therefore He could not hurt her.

Anyways.

“Let’s roll out, then, I guess,” she said.

“Only I’m allowed to make that joke,” said Babs.

Marinette blinked. And then her face reddened. “Oh — I—!”

Cass shook her head in mock disappointment.

Marinette huffed. “Is it too late to un-team?”

“Nah, we shook on it, it’s binding,” Babs said.

Well. If that’s the case. They rolled ou— started off in search of others.

It was, honestly, a lot of meandering around. If they managed to go in the right direction too many times, the illusion would break, after all.

But, if nothing ‘entertaining’ was happening, they needed to work extra hard to have interesting conversations to listen in on. Which was hard. Usually, they entertained their guests by flirting, which was easy and didn’t take that much mental energy, but that was no longer really an option. They weren’t going to flirt with each other, especially since Dick and Cass were siblings and Dick and Babs were exes (Dick once again ruining things for everyone, shame on him). So…

Marinette walked alongside Babs. “If you don’t mind me asking, how the heck are you able to use your wheelchair when the ground is like this?” she said. The wheels didn’t look all that special, after all – it was all clearly high-quality, don’t get her wrong, but it wasn’t like she was looking at the wheelchair version of four wheel drive. And the gun in her lap was barely even moving.

“That’s the most fucked up question anyone’s ever asked me,” deadpanned Babs.

Marinette huffed. “Now, I just don’t think that’s true.”

“When have I ever lied?”

“I’m still convinced that the debt was a scam,” she sniffed.

Babs rolled her eyes but distinctly didn’t deny it. Because she couldn’t, clearly, not because she just didn’t feel that this was worth her time or energy. “This isn’t any worse than going down sidewalks.”

Marinette envisioned the Average Gotham Sidewalk. Then looked at the ground. She supposed that the sticks kind of resembled used syringes, now that she thought about it, and the dirt was surprisingly much smoother than the pothole-riddled concrete.

“Oh,” she said. “Okay, makes sense, yeah.”

Well. She had done her job. Someone else needs to pick up the slack, now.

Babs sent her a flat look that said she needed to say something that would interest the audience, not just her. She fought the urge to grumble under her breath. The microphone would pick that up, too.

She turned to look at Dick.

“Okay, philosophical question: if you are aware that you are in denial, is it really denial, or is it a weird form of acceptance?”

It was silent for a moment.

“Er… I guess… acceptance?”

“But then it’s not denial. Different stage,” Cass said.

“But if you’re aware of it, it can’t be denial,” Dick argued.

Babs sighed. “How ‘aware’ is this ‘awareness’? Because, I’m pretty sure, even people in denial kind of know things are weird.”

“Nonono, you’re aware of the denial,” said Marinette. “Like, you know the thing you’re in denial about is bad and you go ‘nahhhhh’. But it’s a conscious decision.”

“Then… ugh. Denial, I guess.”

Babs and Cass started arguing. Marinette was pretty sure this was the most talkative and passionate she had ever seen Cass.

As for the guests… they were either arguing vehemently themselves or watching other people argue with amused grins.

Marinette, discreetly, gave a little bow in Dick’s direction. He gave a huff of laughter.

By the time they stumbled across another person, Cass seemed pissed off enough to go all out. This wasn’t intentional, but it was still funny to watch Duke go from relatively calm and in control to immediately ducking behind a tree for cover for fear of death.

Until he started firing at them all, too, and they were forced to book it to the nearest shelter.

You might argue that they were cowards, and should help out Cass, and you’d be right, but…

They wouldn’t be much help, to be honest.

The way Duke and Cass were fighting was insane. Like they already knew what each other’s movements were going to be ahead of time, and thus were more intent on waiting for the other to slip up than outright outsmarting each other.

Marinette whistled lowly. “How often do you guys come here?”

“Here? This is the first time, actually,” said Dick, brightly. “But we have something like this back at the Manor.”

She hated rich people.

(This fact has been made abundantly clear over the past few chapters, but she would like to say it again. And again. For as many times as it would take for them to stop pulling Rich People Shit.)

“Woooow,” she said, trying to infuse as much fake cheeriness into her tone as was physically possible when her main thought was about how, technically, friendly fire is possible here. “What a perfectly amazing use of your money.”

He nodded his agreement. Whether or not it was joking did not matter when her blood was boiling beneath her skin. She started to lift her gun, intent on either helping Cass or betraying both Cass and Duke at once, only for a stray bullet to nail the wall by her head the moment she started to poke her head out.

She stared at the purple paint for a moment, eyes wide, before slowly shrinking back into hiding.

She was still pissed off, though!

Before her eyes could drift to Babs and she could weigh the moral implications of sending her out first, a handful of skittles was shoved in front of her face.

“Want some?” said Jason.

She nodded, taking all of the red ones and popping them in her mouth. Dick did the same, but with the green pieces, like a weirdo (who the hell prefers green?). Babs wasn’t nearly as picky, just taking a handful of the rest and popping them like pills.

And then she started to lift her gun.

Marinette nearly choked on her sweet treat.

“JASON?!” Dick yelped.

They scrambled for their own guns.

Jason managed to get a shot off on Babs before he was covered in yellow. Maybe they shot him more times than was strictly necessary, but that was what he deserved for using Skittles against them. Honestly, the fact that Dick didn’t believe in the death penalty was the only thing saving him right now.

As for Marinette… well, she had been too intent on looting his ‘corpse’ for more candy to bother with murdering him via paintball gun. After all, what if the Skittles ended up getting blood or — god forbid — paint on them? She wouldn’t even be able to kill him in retaliation for messing up her snack.

She grumbled when she found paintballs, but pocketed them for extra ammo, in case Cass won and needed more.

Then, finally, she procured her prize: a sharing size bag of candy.

Life is good.

Unless you are Jason Todd.

“Maaaaan,” he groaned. “Those are mine, y’know.”

“Shhhhh, you’re a corpse, you can’t speak,” Dick said, holding his hand out for some.

She set the paintballs in his hand instead.

And then watched on in horror as he bit down on one without thinking.

Dick stared at her for a moment, purple dripping from his mouth.

Marinette swallowed down the temptation to joke about him looking like a vampire in favor of frantically looking up whether paintballs were nontoxic or if they were about to cut this paintball tournament short.

… which she wouldn’t mind, actually, now that she thought about it...

She considered the google page saying that they were nontoxic (for humans, at least, apparently they were not good for animals, which Damian was going to be distressed about when he learned), wondering whether an ambulance visit would be added to her debt. And then decided she didn’t want to risk it.

“You’re fine.”

Want to know who wasn’t fine? Cass and Duke. Apparently, in the time it took for everything to settle, Duke and Cass had killed each other off. Or, well, Duke had slipped up and Cass had ‘died’ in solidarity with him. Mildly concerning behavior, but it was a paintball game and therefore has no real indication of actual behaviors. Hopefully. Marinette genuinely liked Cass.

No time to linger on that particular line of thought.

“If Tim wins I’m pulling a Cass,” Marinette told Dick.

Dick raised an eyebrow. “You’d already be ‘dead’ if Tim wins.”

She thought this over. “Then I’ll come back as a zombie and be killed again. Perfect.”

Jason did not seem to find this funny, but maybe he was still bitter about having his Skittles stolen. Dick grinned and, really, that’s all that matters.

“What do you think real life zombies are like?” he asked.

She shrugged. “Nonexistent.”

“Don’t know what I was expecting from the scientist,” he huffed.

“Fiiiiiine,” she said. She thought, long and hard, about what a real life zombie would be like. Blüdhaven got nuked a while back (deserved, fuck Blüdhaven), and she hadn’t yet heard of zombies, so radiation poisoning wasn’t going to do it. So probably an intentional thing — Jurassic Park style experimentation, or something. Which means that the circumstances would be controlled… except zombies would probably escape the labs, if Marinette were to ever see them. The body would have to be very cold to slow down decomposition. It wouldn’t even halt it entirely.

“Gross,” she decided.

Dick stared at her. “All that thought and you come up with ‘gross’?!”

“I’m not wrong. They’d be gross.”

“That is not the point!” he groaned. “Talk about whether you think they’d be fast or slow, strong or weak, intelligent or not! Talk about whether their decomposition would affect them!”

She snickered. “Careful, Richard, or you’re going to make people think you have a brain in there.”

For a moment, he froze. And then he purposefully relaxed, each muscle individually untensing, one by one. He laughed lightly, but it was a tad bit forced (when wasn’t it, though?). “Yeah, the zombies will come after me if they know.”

“Being stupid has its benefits, yeah?”

He chuckled humorlessly.

Before he could come up with a proper response, though, Tim wandered into their area, drawn by the sound of gunfire from Duke and Cass’s fight. Marinette and Dick pointed their guns at him immediately.

Tim narrowed his eyes. He pointed his gun at Marinette, but seemed hesitant.

Marinette fought off a smirk. She loved having plot armor. At the sight of her face, he only seemed more irritated, which was even better.

But there was nothing he could do.

He set his gun down.

“We could take him as hostage,” Dick offered. “See if that lures Damian –.”

“Nah, too risky,” said Marinette. Without any further ado, she shot Tim.

Tim fell over, and not entirely because that was standard for ‘dead’ people. He hugged himself. His dignity, breaking. In a very literal sense.

It was very quiet. Marinette’s hand found its way to her mouth.

Dick looked at her, his eyes wide and horrified.

“I know I hate you, but… I didn’t mean… I forgot that men have… Tim, I’m so sorry.”

Tim made a pitiful sound.

Shakily, he lifted a hand in a thumbs up.

She made a heart with her own hands. This did not seem to help in the slightest but, frankly, there wasn’t much else she could do.

Luckily, she didn’t need to think about it for long before she was distracted — a voice called from behind them: “Found you.”

She whipped around and shot Damian in the chest.

There were a few moments where no one knew what to do. The boy stared at the paint staining his armor bright yellow. Marinette’s grip felt clammy on her gun.

Dick tipped his head to the side consideringly.

She met his eyes.

She was no longer amused by the intelligence lingering in his gaze as he scrutinized her. She narrowed her eyes at him, briefly, daring him to say something. She wasn’t the only one hiding things, after all.

Play along, she told him. Help me fix this ending.

He relaxed his expression carefully.

They had an understanding. Despite Marinette’s supposed incompetence with guns, when startled she was quick to shoot and accurate. Despite Dick constantly acting as if he was dumb, there was clearly a brain hidden somewhere there. They both knew more than they tried to let on. Maybe that was why they didn’t have much trouble identifying each other’s acts… but, so long as their own secrets remained intact, they could keep each others’.

It was a little nerve-wracking, and yet, strangely, nice, to have someone you don’t have to lie to. That can see past it even when you try.

She smirked and lifted her gun. “See? This is why you keep your finger on the trigger, Dick.”

He grinned and held up his hands in surrender.

*****

Marinette and Dick grimaced as a cooler full of paint was poured over their backs. They definitely felt victorious right about now. This was their prize for winning. Yay them.

Sure, they didn’t exactly, genuinely earn the win, but that’s besides the point.

He looked at her. “You’ve got red in your hair.”

She yelped and brought a hand up to try and get it out, only to remember just a second too late that her hands, too, were covered in paint. She stared at the glob of paint-covered hair hanging limp in front of her eyes for a moment, devastated, and then glared at him.

“You did that on purpose.”

“I was just pointing something out for you,” he said ‘innocently’, unable to quite keep himself from smiling.

She hummed, and then slapped her hand onto his hair. He hissed and reflexively his hands flew up to touch the sore spot, only for him to realize that now he had been the one baited into getting paint in his hair.

“Marinette,” he said, smiling sweetly.

For a moment, one could almost see the regret flickering across her features.

And then he rushed forward to try and trap her in a hug. She shrieked, managing to get only a few steps before she was snatched up, dragged into the evil monster. She barely even had time to fight back before she was thrown over his shoulder, only able to yell off-brand curse words and try to writhe around in hopes of freedom – or, at least, in hopes that she could smear her own paint over every part of him she could reach.

Within minutes, they were swirling messes of red, blue, purple, and the occasional scrap of visible skin.

There were people laughing at their antics.

Both of them froze.

They looked up, and found the other members of the Host Club were enjoying the show.

As well as a few guests, but they couldn’t really retaliate against them.

So, Dick set Marinette down and they met each other’s eyes and silently resolved to make up for that by attacking their fellow club members twice as much to compensate.

*****

Marinette heaved a sigh as she sat on a bench, scrubbing paint off her arm with her millionth wet wipe of the day. Where did the green even come from?

It was then that she realized someone was nearing her.

She looked over her shoulder and found…

Well, someone her age. She recognized her, vaguely, from her English class, but their name eluded her.

The girl smiled nervously at Marinette, wringing her hands and somewhat avoiding eye contact. “I – uh – was wondering if you could Host for me sometime?”

Marinette stared at her for a moment, processing.

And then she lit up, practically jumping from her seat in order to shake the girl’s hand.

“That sounds great! What day would you –?”

She drew her hand back, and cringed at the red strings of paint now connecting their hands.

“I… don’t know if I have more wet wipes,” she said, blushing.

The girl smiled, amused. “If you walk me home, I’ll consider it even.”

Marinette hesitantly took her hand again, intertwining their fingers. “Okay. Don’t know if that’s much of a punishment, but if that’s what it takes to repay you…”

~~~~~~~~~~

TBC

Taglist: @ev-cupcake @thatonecroc @toodaloo-kangaroo @fangirlingfanatic

#ohshc au #keysmash au #maribat #one day izzys birthday chapters are gonna be uploaded on like january 1st or something #dickinette #stephinette #cassinette #adrienette #timinette #jasonette #dukinette #daminette #babsinette

[quotidian-oblivion]

✨Out of context lines shitpost Pt. 8✨

Part 7

Quo: This is it... our last day of childcare course. And... *sighs* I'm getting choked up. I met @mispeltnostalgia and got to know her well through this course and she's been the best irl fanfic buddy and older brother despite being a year younger than me ever.

Nog: These out of context things have made me so happy and its fun to look back and remember the funny shit that we have said and done this year. this deffo won't be the last though. Quo and I will forever be saying and doing stupid shit. Quo is the best little sister ever and while I'll miss our fridays together she cant get rid of me. I know too many of her fanfics and she's beta-ing my works.

Quo: You beta-ed a couple of mine too!

We'll still be posting the out of context lines, but there are going to be longer gaps since we're not gonna meet on Fridays anymore :( There's still our weekly study sessions that we dubbed TEAS on Wednesday!

~

Tim: *holding a ball of wool to Jason’s face as a pretend mic* What do you say about the Curse you just found out you have Jason: *clears throat* I hope it kills me. ~ Jason: What do you have to say about your Curse? Tim: …I’ve had it since I was fucking born. ~ Barbara: So I bought a pack of quick oats because I love oats. And then I bought another pack of overnight oats because it had yoghurt, and now I’m just realizing that I really am just a horse. Little Shit Young!Jason: THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING. ~ Damian: I’ve been able to find a knife, I’ve been able to find a fork, but I can’t find a spoon. Jon: You have all the stabby objects in your bag Damian: I also have a fuckton of crochet hooks and— a pocket watch?? *pulls out pocket watch* Where the fuck is my spoon. ~ Steph: So I was getting pumped up for this song but then I just hear this tiny Alvin and the chipmunks voice say “Party Rock” and it just dashed my hopes. Listen to this *Plays Party Rock Anthem”. Damian: … Steph: Like, imagine getting pumped up for one of your childhood songs then you just suddenly hear “party rock” in this high-pitched voice and I felt like killing myself. Damian: … Steph: And hear me out— Damian: I don’t think i want to hear you out anymore. Steph: *Continues to play Bad Romance covered by the Alvin and the Chipmunks” ~ Tim: *Watching a video of Bruce* Bart: Wait, your dad sounds American. Bart: And he speaks kind of like you too! Tim: Yeah, I wonder why my American dad who raised me sounds and has the same speech patterns as me. Hmm, good question. Bart: I just wasn’t expecting it. I forgot that American dads were a thing. ~ Steph: i am granting you the honor of waffle ~ Barbara: *looking for a place to put popcorn. Places the popcorn against Dick’s lap* Dick: hell yeah crotch popcorn! Omg crotchcorn! Barbara: Please don't. ~ Bruce: You have to be very careful out there. These racist attacks are getting worse. Dick: Don't worry, Pops. I'm with a white person, I'll be fine. Barbara: *chokes on her drink with laughter* ~ Tim: *mixes soda water, energy drink and trace amounts of tea together in a tumbler* For funsies. *chugs it* ~ Jason: *falls to the floor, crumbles and silently screams in a public library* Barbara: Stop it, you’re embarrassing yourself Jason: I’m a drama kid, I can do whatever I want ~ Steph: *singing* I am not a quitter Tim: *singing with her* Pocket full of glitter Steph: Yarn balls, I’m a knitter!  Steph and Tim: *singing together* I’m the whole package, baby! Tim: I haven’t met you Steph: But if you’re staaable Tim and Steph: Then here’s my number! And call me Mabel! ~ Alfred: *grabs Bruce by the shoulders and shakes* BE PRODUCTIVE! ~  Steph: IS THAT A PURPLE BALLOON??? Steph: *walks over, picks it up, and carries it like a baby* *whispers* I’m pregnant ~  Damian, high on pain meds: *giggling while he draws Tim falling off a roof* whee whee, hee hee, I’m so funny. Hee hee hee. He’s falling off a building.

#quotidian convos #nogolsta says hi #tim drake #dick grayson #jason todd #bruce wayne #batfam #dc #damian wayne #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #alfred pennyworth #batfamily #batdad #the batfamily #bart allen #jon kent #jonathan kent #jonathan samuel kent #bat fam #bat family #batfam headcanons #batfam incorrect quotes #batfam shenanigans #batfamily headcanons #batfamily shenanigans #dc batfam #incorrect batfam #incorrect batfamily quotes #batbros

[headcanonthings]

So I have seen a couple fics where Tim runs a conspiracy social media account. And those are great! But you know what I think would be absolutely HILARIOUS? A fic where Tim gets everyone right but the Batfam (on purpose)

Okay stick with me for this because I’m pretty coming up with this on the spot and am typing this up on the app

So I’m going to start with the classic AU premise where Tim didn’t join the Batfam

Did Jason not die so there was no need? Or did Steph step up first? IDK but for whatever reason Tim did not become Robin and still lives all by his lonesome in a giant empty mansion next door to the family he’s obsessed with

Tim is still his usual stalker-y self and figured out Batman and Robin’s identity when he was a little kid

And since he’s not busy being part of the Bats, he’s got to fill his time up somehow so as more heroes start popping up Tim starts to see if he can figure out their identities too

And he does! Because he’s a freaking genius!

But what’s he gonna do with all this info??? He’s not gonna sell it or anything because he’s not EVIL

So he just kind of sits on it. Goes out and takes his pictures (he even makes a couple trips out of Gotham to get some snaps of the other heroes) . And pretends that living in an empty mansion doesn’t bother him at all. Nope. Not one bit. He is totally mentally okay.

So I’m not fully sure how he’s make the jump. Maybe he’s just really bored one day? Or maybe his parents in one of their rare conversations say something disparaging about his intellect?

Oh! Or maybe he sees everyone online one day throwing out theories about a hero and they are hilariously wrong. And Tim can’t resist. He figures if he builds a quick dummy/anon account his theory will just get lost in the rest of the noise

So he starts posting his theory (is it still a theory when he knows it’s a fact?) about the hero of todays focus …let’s say Green Arrow. Tim lays out all the evidence that could be easily accessed by the public on why Oliver Queen is the Green Arrow.

Tim is still careful though so his tone is pretty jokey throughout so that most readers are just assuming he’s making a joke theory

But that kind of backfired on Tim because that just helps spread it around

And maybe Tim’s one common sense brain cell is out for an extended vacation or something because even after his Ollie Queen is Green Arrow theory blows up he does it again! Maybe following it up with Black Canary or Arsenal?

And then he…just…keeps…going

He keeps up the jokey tone but if anyone gives it more than a couple seconds thought all his evident is really plausible!

Which worries the fuck out of the heroes because who the fuck is this guy and why does he know who all of them are!

Maybe after he’s done a couple theories people start asking him about specific heroes and Tim replies either right away because he already know or he’ll take a few days if it’s for someone he hast figured out yet (like some of the newer heroes)

But then someone asks about Batman and suddenly his common sense brain cell kicks in because nine year old Tim promised himself that he would NEVER reveal the Bats secret and he can’t break that promise!

So he throws out a completely trash theory that is nowhere near the Waynes. Maybe he picks Commissioner Gordon or some other well to do Gothamite (maybe even picks his own dad because what Gotham kid didn’t wish their dad was batman at some point?)

He tries to make sure that the theory is still plausible so it doesn’t stand out against his other ones

But this just throws more red flags up for the hero community because if he got all of the rest of them right why would this one be suddenly wrong?

Does batman know who it is? Is batman the one running the account? Did the account change hands and that’s why it’s suddenly wrong? If so what happened to the person who actually knew their identities?

I honestly don’t know where it all goes at this point.

Just like a mess of hijinks as heroes come up with plans to throw off anyone from actually believing Tim’s theories.

The Bats taking on the task of figuring out who discovered everyone’s identities and Tim both purposefully and also a bit accidentally being two steps ahead of them

Some inevitable confrontation where The Bats figure out the neighbor boy, who they all thought was traveling with his parents!, is the one who’s figured them all out

All of the Bats almost immediately deciding to adopt Tim (the kids just yelling at Bruce how is he not already out brother! He should have been years ago!)

The hero community demands Tim stop running his conspiracy (but actually it’s all true) social account and Tim sort of agrees by just switching it over to a full roast account

He starts liking other conspiracies and started backing them up with more plausible evidence

I don’t know I just think it would be really funny if Tim basically doxes every other superhero except for the Batfam because he’s loyal to them (and because of a promise he made to himself when he was a kid)

Wait one last thing just imagine after all of this, once he’s been integrated into the Batfam and the hero community under his own hero identity, he makes one more original conspiracy thread all around his own moniker and but it’s all Batman just found me and made me a hero :)

#fic outline #kind of #this is just a mess of thoughts really #headcanon #dcu #batman #batfamily #Tim drake #conspiracy theorist Tim drake

[f10werfae]

Sleeping Patient

pairing: Chris Evans x Doctor!Reader

Summary: After a tough time at work Y/n goes through another episode of sleep paralysis, just when she thought it was getting better. Chris takes it upon himself to go over the top to solve this, as usual.

- Requests are open!

Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️

Chris Evans Masterlist✨

Full Masterlist 💫

Taglist Form🌟

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

(Y/n's P.O.V)

It’s a well known fact Doctors do not have the best work-life balance, and it’s for good reason. For years even when I was training as a junior doctor, things like sleep paralysis was a constant nightmare, quite literally. It usually happens a couple of times over a range of months, so luckily not daily.

“Y/n you should really head home girl, you’ve been up for 36 hours straight. That’s not ok” Steph groaned taking the clipboard out of my hands, working in the emergency department did that to you. Days of just staying up late, nights of restless work and reports.

“But the patient in room 305-“

“Calm down girl, I know your man must be waitin for ya at home. Don’t drive home, i’ll call you a cab okay?” With one ring of a cab, Steph handed me my coat and duffle bag from the locker room and stood with me outside to wait for my taxi.

“Are you sure you’ll be alright tonight-“

“Yes hun, go home and relax, I know you’re off for the rest of the week”

Nodding my head I stepped into the yellow cab that had just arrived, telling the driver my address I just let my head fall onto the rain stricken window. God I had forgotten what it was like to finally be in a somewhat peaceful environment, no more ringing sounds in my ears, or the constant rush of adrenaline.

(Chris' P.O.V)

Getting off the phone from one of Y/n's coworkers Steph, I stood outside of our front door, sitting on the chair on our porch.

My poor girl has done nothing but work tirelessly these past few weeks, especially with COVID on the rise again. With me being away for multiple projects this year, like Ghosted, I knew she used work as a distraction from staying alone in the house.

I walked down the path once I saw the yellow cab pull up, handing the driver some bills, I opened Y/n's door who was clearly dozing off in the back. Looking at the cute sleepy look on her face, I took her bag from her and basically carry her into the house.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“ ‘m sorry Chris, i’m such a mess” She mumbled as I set her to lay down on the bed, her head lifting slightly while I took off her shoes and started taking off her work scrubs.

“Don’t apologise sweetheart, i’m so proud of ya” I cooed watching a sleepy smile grow on her face as she somehow found the energy to crawl under the covers. Pulling back my side of the covers I slipped in beside her, her body slowly moving towards mine and wrapping itself around me.

Within seconds Y/n was knocked out on my chest, light snores leaving her lips, her face looking much more rested and calmer. Deciding It was still too early to sleep, I turned on the bedroom T.V and switched to some random channel for some background noise.

(Y/n's P.O.V)

'What the fuck? Not again’

I felt a continuous weight pushing down on me from somewhere, my eyes half cracked open yet I couldn’t speak or move. Sleep paralysis.

For years I had continuous spurts of sleep paralysis episodes, recently not really but I knew it was coming at some point.

Moving my eyes about I could see Chris was awake yet his attention was on something else in the room. Then the worst part started, a dark figure appeared in the dark corner of our room, it was always faceless and resembled a shadow. It never moved or anything, just stayed there silently torturing me as I lay there helpless.

I felt my breathing start to quicken out of my nose, the feeling of anxiety bubbling up horribly in my chest.

(Chris' P.O.V)

Mindlessly watching the screen, I felt a major shift in Y/n's breathing. Looking down I saw her pretty eyes dart around the room crazily,

“You awake Y/n/n?”

No reply.

I repeated my question only to see her eyes meet mine, it instantly giving my chills as I watched them tear up. Shaking her a bit to no avail, I now sat up and shook her a tiny bit harder; then all I heard was her breaking into wrecked sobs. Her breathing was all over the place as she held onto my shirt tightly, her face hidden.

“B-baby what the hell just happened? Are you alright? Did ya have a nightmare?”

“Water” She croaked out gasping for air,

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

(No one’s P.O.V)

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“I’m pretty sure t-that was another episode of sleep paralysis” Y/n breathed out handing back the cup of water for Chris to set back onto the bedside table.

“You’ve had this before?”

“I mean not recently, it was before we got together it was really bad, so I thought it had gotten better” Y/n shrugged tugging up the covers to her neck

“Bub why didn’t you tell me? You know I would have helped you with anything?”

“I don’t know I didn’t see it as a big deal, plus I know how busy you’ve been I don’t wanna add onto that ya know?”

“Y/n what did I say when we first got together?”

“I’m your number one priority” Y/n breathed out feeling Chris' arms wrap around her even more, both of their bodies smushed together in a bundle of blankets.

“Will ya sing for me?” Y/n asked, with Chris starting to him ‘The Carpenters - Close to You’ into her ears softly, his large hands rubbing up and down her back gently. Y/n's eyes were still tired with sleep, even with the episode she was desperate to fall back asleep again. That sense of happiness filling her when she realised she was off for the next four days, and Chris was too.

“Sleep tight baby”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Chris hummed holding onto Y/n's hands tenderly as they sat outside the bed store, mattresses filling the furniture store they were currently at. Reading up on sleep paralysis, Chris read that one of the main ways to help was to ensure a good night’s sleep. With a rich man like Chris by your side, he insisted (forced) that you actually buy a whole new mattress for your guys' bed.

“Chris we don’t actually need a whole new mattress”

“Shush honey, after we fixed your working hours, I am making sure your bed is practically heaven” He said pressing a finger to Y/n’s lips to stop her from talking, standing up when a store attendant headed their way

“N' it means we get to christen the thing, any way we want” Chris whispered bending down to Y/n, his fingertips dancing over the small of her back.

———

Taglist Tags (form is up there^^): @pandaxnienke @patzammit @seren-a-ity @thereisa8ella @mrspeacem1nusone @evanstanwhore @itsaylayay1213 @kimhtoo17 @chrisevansdaughter @vrittivsanghavi @dumb-fawkin-bitch @tojisbabymommy @bxdbxtxh15 @madebylilly @sairsei @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @chrisevansangel @royalwriteroftheuniverse @mysticfalls01 @taramaria @mirikusashes @marvelgurl @xoxokiaraaxoxo @caps-shield1918 @uwiuwi

#romance #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans oneshot #x reader #chris evans rpf

[awigglycultist]

NPMD thoughts

Omg Richie's screams

Poor Richie my beloved

He's dead <3

Oh wait Ruth's headgear is missing in this song

Grace covering her mouth!

STEPH! PETE! <3

WHAT A START

Sycamore! We really need to know more about them

Rip Peter

I love the running in Literal Monster

Out first Max saying Bitch incident!

Get him up! Get this fucker up!!

I love being able to properly see everyone's facial expressions

I hate Solomon so much

Steph is very stupid for putting her hand above her phone as it's about to me smashed but also I'd probably do the same

"this projects on thermodynamics, what the fuck are you talking about?"

I literally love Ruth's, Pete's and Richie's friendship so much

"What was I like when she touched your arm? Did you cum!?"

"Pete silence your phone in the library!" you guys have been screaming this whole time but ok

NANI?

Ugh Pete you are cooler than you think you are!

Love Max finishing the "woah oh oh oh"

"Had to sell your bowtie to feed your fuckin family?"

Omg Pete's breathing and whining while Max is monologuing <3

"now say your fucking prayers bitch!" "-amen!" is still such a good transition

"mom will you pass the buttstuff?" "I just want some head and butter" "bread and buttstuff" still get me

"I love... Jesus <3 :)"

Dirty Girl should not be so good

"WHO ON OCCASION GETS DIRTY!"

Me trying to watch this and imagine watching with my dad to figure out the appropriateness and if gonna have to skip past parts

Ugh Pete <3

Ugh Steph caring about Pete so much despite knowing him for one day <3

Hatchettown notfi!

#pottypants let's get it trending

IT'S BULLY THE BULLY TIME!!!

Love hoe you can see Steph slowly getting into it

Beans cool? Excellent!

Pete's and Richie's finger fun moment!

"who was that?" "my boyfriend!" "sounded like a telemarketer" "okay my ex boyfriend"

Love the screams after "you kinda look like that homeless man from downtown"

"fucking useless Pete!"

"no he thinks the ghost is real he's just really fucking brave"

"I am Jägerman! I am God! Go Nighthawks!"

Skele'on

The little bit of info that Max's dad would call him a cuck and the fact that his bullying likely comes from a lot more trauma with his dad

It's the nicest thing anyone's ever done for him :(

Rip the glow in the dark skeleton costume

"this is Hatchetfield, people go missing everyday!"

Love Kyle and Brenda, what a supportive couple

"this is really your C+" "oh, Steph, you can keep it :)"

"with consent of cour cause we care!"

FUCK YOU CLIVESDALE!!!

Zeke the fighting Nighthawk like Ezekiel from Perky's Buds! Did Ekekiel name himself after Hatchetfield's mascot?

Love the audience cheering after "fuck Clivesdale fuck em straight to hell!"

Richie struggling with costume is so good

"I love being alive!"

God the costume and makeup up close! So good!!!

Smoke club!

Richie's fall is so good!!!

Jon's singing is seriously so good in npmd

And god Will is incredible

Yup Mark & Karen were just so wild at 18

"you don't say, you don't say. I'm be down there in a jiffy" "what'd they did dad?" "they didn't say"

Jeff voice over cameo!

Davis!

Love that Grace calls the cops pigs

Davis and Virginia!

Ziggy! Barry! Charlie!

Bryce's solo <3

Gerlad!

Love the cameos so much (but also rip Jerry, least it's preserved in the album

The bbq monologues bit is so stupid and so good and funny

Me Barbecue!

I love Trevor I hope we see him again

"I'm my dreams, it's my barbecue!"

Just For Once is so silly and so emotional love it it's underrated

"it fucking worked I'm fucking here he's fucking her!"

Lauren is so good!!

"take a bow, bitch"

"Every citizen of Clivesdale is guilty until proven innocent"

Shapiro saying she found the wwjd bracelet in the principal's office really got me the first time

"it's God plan! And now he's leaving me out to dry! Do something you son of a bitch!"

PAUL & EMMA!!!!

The knowledge of what card Jon hands Lauren makes this scene better

"I have been waiting for what feels like 5 fucking years and I still haven't gotten my hot chocolate!"

Emma spitting in the coffee!

Rip "women shoe"

AHHH IF I LOVED YOU!!!

"Leave room for Jesus!"

"she's bisexual and dead where else would she be!"

Rip Angela's fall

"get your hands out of your pocket! Put your hands down! He's going for a gun!"

The scream!

Also the audience screaming during this entire scene from Paul's & Emma's entrance to Emma screaming, so valid and great

"don't comfort her she's fucking weird"

I hate him but we absolutely need to know more about Solomon, how do the Mayor's learn so much

The black book! The nightmare time theme!

And another reason we need to know more about Solomon, why tf did he have the black book and what did he do with it

Max's one liners are so great

"on the ground bitch I'm a cop!"

"are you a women of faith?" "catholic" "I'll take that as a no"

"there's something deeply wrong with this whole town" yeah there sure is

Pete saying he has no idea what he's doing when he checks for Shapiro's pulse is such a great way of keeping it unknown if she's alive or dead

AAAHHHH THE SUMMONING

"t'noy karaxis" particularly scratches my brain

AHHH THE LORDS IN BLACK

I am a bit sad you can't see all the dance moves at the same time and you so you can't really see them changing dances with each other but also the close ups are so cool and very fitting for the scene!

Jon putting his fingers together so it's reminiscent of the doll only having three is such a cool choice

GOD FUCKING DAMMIT JOEY RICHTER WHY DO YOUR EMOTIONAL PERFORMANCES HAVE TO BE SO GOOD

I WAS RIGHT I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR CAITIA REPRISE

They both do a great job during this and I NOT OKAY

Max's fucking beat boxing

"so you do know the bible!"

This is scene is seriously so crazy

Graces entrance afterwards with the cigarette is so great and Max's entrances afterward laying on the bench is so great

The spin!

The lighting!!!

Homecoming time!

Someone remind me to add Joey in best of you to the air guitar thread

And that's it. That's where ends :)

Grace is so crazy and I love her

#starkid #hatchetfield #npmd spoilers #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #nerdy prudes must die spoilers

[broadstbroskis]

choosing you | william nylander

a/n: rolling in late (as usual) for @antoineroussel winter fic exchange! demi, thank you for running such a wonderful fic exchange, as always! you are an angel among us for organizing this!

i had the absolute pleasure of writing for @nylwnder. i was so so SO excited to write this for you darling! i hope you enjoy!

-----

“I’m going to be alone forever!” 

Nobody even turns to look when Will throws himself in the booth. At one end, Auston and Morgan are talking about their plans for the Raptors game this weekend while Tessa tries to shove her way to Morgan’s other side to join a more interesting conversation. 

Jordan and Mikey and Marissa and Alex are next to them, comparing cute stories about their dogs. Occasionally, they’ll catch Mitch’s attention and he’ll sneak a peek at whatever picture or video has been pulled up and then throw a comment in about how Zeus is the best dog ever, before jumping right back into the debate that he’s having with you, Steph, Justin, and Audrey about which would win in a fight, a gorilla or a grizzly bear. 

“I don’t know how you don’t choose bear!” Justin repeats, even as Audrey is shaking her head at him.

“Hello?” Will whines, leaning against you. “ Did anyone hear me?”

“Being overdramatic?” You pat your hand against his, kind of patronizingly, but this type of behavior from Will isn’t really anything new. “We heard. We just don’t believe it.” You pivot right back into the debate. “Let that gorilla take a swing at ya, buddy. That’s how you don’t choose bear.”

“Thank you!” Audrey cries.

“I got people 6ft tall coming at me everyday! Bring it!” Justin throws his hands up in a challenge.

“You’re both crazy!” Steph looks at you and Audrey and shakes her head.

“People survive bear attacks!” You argue.

Mitch nods. “Gorillas are fucking savage!”

“Oh you know this from all your personal experience hanging out with gorillas?” Steph asks.

“How-how did we get here?” Will frowns, still draped over you and begging for attention.

“Well we somehow started with whether you’d rather fight the one horse sized duck or one hundred duck sized horses.” Justin explains. “But obviously, that’s-”

“-the horse sized duck.” You all chime in together.

“Oh, of course.” Will says, like your obvious conclusion was the one everyone would have reached (it should be).

“And it spiraled from there.” Audrey says.

“I, too, am spiraling.” Will tells her and she immediately fights back a laugh. “Because I’m going to die alone.”

“I guess we have to do this, then?” Justin sighs. 

“You are the married couple who’s supposed to like, have your shit together and offer good advice.” Mitch says.

“Hold up, we did not sign up for that!” Audrey says, as you and Steph laugh. “We’re like, the fun older siblings that you still get in trouble with. John and Aryne are your stable adults.”

“Can we get back to me?” Will jumps in quickly, probably worried that’s about to start another tangent.

“What’s to get back to?” You ask him. “Break ups suck. Get yourself a drink, and then a lot more, and you’ll feel worse in the morning at first, but then a little better.”

Audrey laughs at what’s become your time honored method for getting over breakups. “It just takes time, babe.” She tells him, which just makes Will look murderous. “You’ll find the right girl eventually.”

“I saw a meme the other day that everyone meets their soulmate by the time they’re like 22.” Alex turns and adds in. “So maybe you already have.”

“That was a meme?” Marissa frowns at him.

“Well nah, the meme was about like, not wanting to dive down that hole again or something.” Marissa gives Alex another look that has you all laughing. “It was funnier when you saw it, okay!” Alex protests.

“Mhmm.” She says, entirely unimpressed and Alex pulls his phone back from Mikey to start scrolling through instagram for it. 

“Finally, something helpful.” Will says, finally pulling back from you.

“What?” You ask, looking over to him, sure you heard him wrong. “What’d you just say?”

“That’s it. I’m going to go back and date all the girls I’ve already dated.”

“What?” You repeat, sure that your face is doing...something.

“That’s what Kerf just said!”

“I don’t-I don’t think that’s what he said at all.” Steph says, looking around her, like she’s waiting for confirmation from the rest of you.

“How did you get that from what he just said?” Justin asks. 

Will doesn’t even look phased at either of those comments, barreling on. “It’s genius. I’ve already found the right girl. I just have to figure out which girl I’ve dated is the right girl.”

Audrey bites her lip to fight back a laugh, but when she speaks, she’s looking directly at you. “Maybe the right girl is closer than you think.”

You send a glare at her across the table, but thankfully, Will seems too focused on figuring out what he wants to drink to try and figure out any cryptic clues she might have been trying to drop to him.

-----

“Audrey was right!” He announces to you the next afternoon, when he lets himself in your apartment after practice.

“About what?” You frown, barely looking up from your laptop and the spreadsheet you’re trying to fix.

“The right girl being closer than I think!”

Your heart stops and your head flies up. Will’s grinning back at you. He looks soft and rumpled after practice, arriving to your place in sweats and a hat, wearing his glasses, and looking like he’s ready to crash on your couch and stay there (you’d let him- you’d let him do that and more, ugh these feelings were the worst), but this? Him coming here and saying this so suddenly? It’s-

“I just ran into Jess at Starbucks!”

You close your mouth. Of course, it wasn’t you. Of course Jess was the first of the girls to re-return, and that he managed to casually run into her no less. 

“That’s awesome!” You manage. “Did you-did you grab coffee with her?”

He nods, then moves his hand back and forth. “Well, kinda. For a few minutes. She had to run to a meeting. But we’re going out later this week for real.”

It’s kind of nice to still be able to duck into your laptop and pretend the reason for the lack of smile on your face is because of work, not Will’s tall, beautiful, smart, could-be-a-supermodel ex-girlfriend. “That’s great.” You tell him and he smiles back at you, before going to make himself comfy on your couch until you’re ready to do something for dinner-a routine that’s as old as your friendship since he came to Toronto. 

It’s begun. You text Steph and Audrey.

Please live text us this disaster. Steph texts back and Audrey immediately follows it with a flaming dumpster gif. 

Jess. Is all you send back and they simultaneously text back a string of gasping emojis, which is pretty much on par for how you think this is going to go.

-----

Will throws himself on your couch dramatically hours after his date with Jess, which would be funny if you couldn’t tell he was upset. 

“What happened?” You ask, fighting back a smile. It’s not that you wanted him to have a bad time. It’s just… you’ve seen this film before. You can guess the ending.

“I don’t know.” He sighs. “It started off fine, I thought, and then she started saying how happy she was that I finally realized I was better than the rest of my friends, and that we could make this work now because of that.”

“Hm.” You say noncommittally, because none of what’s coming out of his mouth from Jess is a surprise.

He sits up at that, looking at you, kind of shocked and kind of mad, and that does surprise you. “You knew?”

“Will!” You shake your head. “Everyone knew. She didn’t make it much of a secret how much she disliked us.”

His jaw drops. “Was I the only one who didn’t know?” You nod. “And you all didn’t tell me?”

You shrug. “Well. We really didn’t think she’d last as long as she did.”

“That’s not really an excuse.” He frowns.

“You’re right,” You acknowledge, because it’s true and you and Steph and Mitch and Auston had all talked about it since. “But it took us a while to realize how different she was around you and us and by the time we did…” You trail off. “You guys had broken up. We didn’t think it’d be an issue again. We never held back after that.”

“Oh you certainly didn’t.” Will mutters, and you know he’s thinking about Abigail and everything that had been said when he’d brought her to meet you all for the first time.

“We’ve found our center!” You cry. “We’re better now!”

Will lies back down, resting his head against your leg and your hand goes to rest in his hair. Will loves having his hair played with and this is the least you can do for him. “You tell yourselves that.”

You brush some hair back from his face, smiling at how content he looks with his eyes closed and the small smile on his face. “I don’t have to, the group chat will do it for me.”

One of his eyes pops open. “There’s a group chat?”

You scratch your nails through his hair, which is probably dirty pool, because he loves that. “Shh, don’t worry about it.”

-----

Steph invites you and Audrey over for a bridal party planning session one evening and Mitch is absolutely gleeful when you walk in the door. 

“Do you know, did you hear?”

“Ugh.” Is all you have to say, reaching for the wine Steph’s already pouring you.

“Come on, man, read the room.” Audrey lectures.

“You do!” He cries, ignoring her completely. “Come on, tell me.”

“I’ve been sworn to secrecy.” You tell him, enjoying the look on his face at that.

He scowls. “We’ve been trying to get it out of him all week. He won’t say shit.” You cackle and he flips you off, grinning as he makes his goodbyes, off to Auston’s with Zeus for the dogs to have a “brodate.”

“Can you really not say?” Audrey whispers, once he’s left, as if that’s not just something you’d said to fuck with Mitch.

You nod. “It’s Alex.”

“Shut up!” Steph cries immediately. 

You raise your eyebrows as you take a sip of wine.

“Is he there now?” Audrey asks. “Like with her? Or at hers?”

You nod.

“Why didn’t we turn this into a reality show?” Audrey wonders aloud. “Forget Leaf to Leaf, the production team has a better purpose this year.”

You crack up, promising to keep them posted when you hear from Will, and with that Steph pulls a book of color samples out.

-----

“Is it me?” Will stares at you expectantly, watching you make yourself coffee the next morning, so you pour a second mug and pass it over to him.

“No.” You assure him. “Well, maybe.” He glares at you. “But really only in this case.”

He huffs. “Why didn’t this one work then?”

You burst into laughter. “Because she’s basically your brother!”

The sight he makes at that- frozen, with his mug halfway to his mouth, jaw dropped just a little- is incredible. It’s so rare that moments like that happen and you have a camera ready to capture them.

Luckily for you, you’ve got your phone in hand already and somehow, have the wherewithal to drop into the camera app and snap a picture.

“Delete that!” He says immediately.

“Never.” You stick your tongue out at him, already texting it to your group with Steph and Audrey. Caption this. 

No thoughts head empty. Steph comes back immediately. 

Audrey’s just as quick. When you can’t remember if you turned the straightener off before you left home.

SO close. You send back, even as Will tries to steal the phone from you. But it’s actually “when your best friend had to be the one to tell you that your ex and your brother are the same person down to their NAME”

Will’s stopped trying to make a play for your phone by the time you get a response back (Steph’s laugh and Audrey, queen of the gif as usual) but he’s looking at you like he’s thinking. “You-you-”

“Yes?” You ask patiently, sipping your coffee.

But there’s not a lot to say on that, you think. Even when Will and Alex had first broken up, he hadn’t been able to give you all much of a reason why at the time, just that for all they had really gotten along in so many ways, something had just seemed off about it-and she had agreed, he’d said- so they’d mutually parted ways. The parallels between her and his brother had been obvious, you thought, and you know it wasn’t just you who saw them.

“You just ruined that whole relationship.” Will says.

Apparently not obvious to Will, though.

“You were already broken up!” You protest.

“No, you ruined my memory of it.” He says with a completely straight face, which he somehow manages to keep for another minute before you realize that he’s fucking with you entirely. 

-----

Brooke arrives back into Will’s life the same way she left it last time- in a whirlwind of drama.

“She did what!” Audrey gasps and you turn the volume down quickly, eyes scanning over the waiting room around you.

“She hit him with her car!” You repeat, looking down at the FaceTime call. “I’m literally at the hospital now, waiting to hear from the doctor.”

“Jesus Christ.” Audrey’s shaking her head in disbelief. “That boy.”

“I mean,” You defend, the need to stick up for Will bubbling up inside you. “It’s not, like, his fault.”

“Not at all, but you’ve got to admit, he does get himself into some wild situations.” She hums. “Auston’s dated some real winners but even he’s never been hit by a car.”

“I-“ You don’t have much of a response to that. “He didn’t get like hit by her car; she just clipped him.”

She gives you a flat look. “That’s what you’re going with?”

“There’s the doctor.” You say lamely, and even though it’s not a lie, you can tell she can see right through you and that you’re thankful for the excuse by the knowing look on her face. “Gotta go.”

“Mmm.” She gives you another look. “Alright babe, you go make sure Will’s okay. I’ll be ready for you with the wine later.”

A nurse brings you back, smiling and chatting politely with you until you reach the area that Will’s been waiting in for a few more tests. At first, you think the bay is empty, but then you realize there are actually two people in the room.

That they’re just sitting that close.

Brooke’s hands are laced with Will’s and there are tracks of mascara running down her face. She doesn’t acknowledge you at all, even as you check in with Will and how he’s feeling, as the doctor gives him a clean bill of health and tells him to follow up with the team doctors tomorrow.

“You ready to go?” You ask Will, and somehow, someway, you already know what’s going to happen next, before Brooke even speaks.

“Actually, Will and I are going to go grab lunch.” She says smoothly. 

Your face freezes, hopefully in somewhat of a smile, but you couldn’t say at all what it was actually doing. Will untangles one hand from Brooke’s to squeeze your shoulder gently, reassuringly, as he passes, and he gives you a smile. “I’ll come see you tomorrow.” He promises, as she pulls him out of the room before you’ve even realized what’s happened.

Definitely going to need that wine. You send Audrey once you manage to collect some thoughts and realize that you’re left alone in an emergency room that wasn’t even for you.

That bad?? You can practically hear the shock in her voice.

Arguably worse. You send back.

Man. She sends. There is something about Brooke.

You don’t respond to that. There’s just something about Brooke, is right 

-----

When it’s been about a week since you’ve seen Will in person, you text him. 

Everything okay?

Everything is great! Why? Wait are you okay? He sends back right away.

Just haven’t seen you in a while! I’m good!

He likes that message and even though he’s sure to text you more frequently after that, you still don’t actually get to see him.

You end up on Audrey Holl’s couch one day when the boys are away, head in Steph’s lap as she openly laughs at you.

“You’re a mess.” Audrey says.

“That’s not news!” You pout at her. “Can you tell me how to get my best friend back, please?”

“Have you just...asked him?” Steph asks. “You sound a lot like Will right now.”

“You take that back!” You poke her leg. She’s sitting far too close to you to be saying things like that.

Steph and Audrey both laugh at that though, but it’s Steph that replies. “Again. Have you asked him to hang out with you recently?”

Your silence answers that.

“Maybe,” Audrey pours another serving of wine in your glass. “You start there.”

They only laugh at you for another few minutes before helping you draft a text to Will, asking if he’s free to hang out when he gets back from his road trip. 

It doesn’t take Will long to respond at all, confirming plans with you the day after they get back, and you settle into girls’ day feeling better than you have since Brooke came back into your lives.

-----

“I’m sorry!” Will hastens to say, but he’s balancing two coffees in hand as he kicks your door shut behind him, so you’re inclined to forgive his lateness. “My-well, it was a whole thing.”

“I was going to give you five more minutes before I sent out a search party.” You laugh, accepting the cup he offers. “Is everything okay?”

He nods. “Yeah.” Then he sighs. “I’m just happy to be here, I’ll say that.”

“Me too.” You blurt out, before you can stop yourself. “I’ve missed you!”

Will just grins. “Me too.” He says, as his phone buzzes. He looks at it, makes a face, and slides it back into his pocket. “Ready to go?”

“For breakfast still?” You throw your hand over your heart dramatically, smiling wider when he grins. “A man after my heart.”

“I know better than to let you go hungry.” Will teases. “This is really for my safety, you see.”

“Mmm.” You nod. “Yeah, uh huh. Nothing to do at all with the pancakes voted best in Toronto only last month.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Will feigns innocence and opens the door to your Uber, ignoring his phone buzzing again. “I would never make a list ranking all those places in order of menu and aesthetic to try them all and see if they’re appropriately rated.”

You’re still cackling as he climbs in beside you, confirming the restaurant for the driver. “You are absurd.”

He shrugs. “You love me anyway.”

You fight back a smile and just shake your head at him, mostly to stop yourself from blurting out that yeah, you do.

Will’s phone starts buzzing again though, and then curiosity stops you from saying anything stupid. You watch as he barely glances at it before ignoring the call and then shoves it back in his jacket pocket and then he changes the subject so quickly you don’t even have time to ask him about it.

It keeps happening though, all throughout breakfast-Will’s phone buzzing with calls and texts and him ignoring it with subject changes or funny quips. You have your suspicions by the fifth or so time it rings, but you don’t get a chance to confirm them until Will gets up to go to the bathroom and leaves his phone behind. 

Brooke’s face has appeared on his screen three times by the time he comes back and it’s ringing again when sits back down. Once again, Will barely looks at it as he ignores the call, but this time you frown. “Do you need to go?”

“Nope.” He says, and you can hear the annoyance in his voice. “I’m exactly where I want to be.”

“It doesn’t sound like someone else wants you here.” You say coolly.

“Well, she doesn’t want me to do a lot of things.” Will mutters.

“Then why are you with her?” It comes out before you can stop it and from the look on his face, the outburst surprises Will as much as it does you. “I didn’t-”

“No, go on.” He says and the silence that follows is the most awkward the two of you have ever sat through.

“I just don’t want you to be unhappy.” You say, finally. “If Brooke is who makes you happy, then great! It’s just- whenever you’re with her, you don’t seem like yourself.”

“I’m fine.” He smiles, but it doesn’t quite as bright as usual, and it feels like prime evidence that something isn’t right.

—--

It’s barely a few hours later when you hear the pounding on your door and you begrudgingly pause your twentieth rewatch of New Girl to go answer it.

“Hi?” You step back to let Will in. “Did we have plans again?”

“No.” Will shuts the door behind him. “I just-”

“Oh.” Your face falls. “Oh no. Brooke?”

“Yeah, but-”

You cut him off. “Aw, Will, I’m so sorry!” You loop your arms around him in a hug, which he quickly returns, squeezing tight. 

“You’re not.” He mutters into your hair.

“Well.” You fight back a smile into his shoulder. “I mean, I’m not sorry it wasn’t Brooke, but I am sorry it didn’t work out. I know how hard you’ve been trying.” You start to pull back, but he keeps his arm around you.

“She asked me to choose.” He says into your hair and you’re pretty sure you heard correctly, but still, you have to ask him to repeat it. “She asked me to choose. Her or you.”

“Oh.” You bite your lip and try to bury your face in his shoulder again. “Um, how-what did you-.”

Will lifts your chin up with his fingers, carefully looking you in the eye and stopping you from looking away. “There’s no choice, okay? I choose you.”

“What?” You breathe.

“I choose you.” Will repeats. “I choose you. I’ve been choosing you this whole time and I’ve been too dumb to see it. I’ll always choose you.”

“Will.” You breathe out, and for the first time, you actually see him look nervous. 

“And I hope, maybe, you’ll choose me too.” Will adds softly, so softly that if you weren’t as close as you are, you aren’t sure you would have heard him.

“Always.” You smile, and that’s all you get to say before Will kisses you.

#william nylander #hockey fanfiction #nhl fanfiction #nhl fanfic #hockey fanfic #my hockey fics

[thepeachyouhadtopick]

ANYTHING BUT ORDINARY | Chapter Twenty-One

The Jackass crew are busy on their last day in Pennsylvania, but amongst it all Ell receives some unwelcome news that could make her entire world crash down again.

I'm back! Apologies for the small hiatus, work has been mad busy and I just haven't had the time to write properly. I'm really excited to show you all where the fic is going over the next few chapters! Obviously it's been a little while since I last published a chapter so I hope this one is just as enjoyable to read as the last ones, I'm a little rusty.

No content warnings for this part, just a lot of fluff and friendship. Very minor bit of smut if you squint.

Taglist: @lizey-thornberry @babybammargera @zolofts (let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!)

“Dude, I could literally hear you two fucking all night, did you even stop?!” Jeff groaned the next day, clearly not as well-rested as he’d have liked to have been as they got ready for another day of shooting. “Oh, sorry man,” Johnny replied with a completely unapologetic grin on his face, “we got a little carried away after the excitement of your little stunt.” It wasn’t Ell’s favourite thing that everyone was suddenly extremely privy to her and Johnny’s sex life, but she was enjoying finally acting like a normal couple around their friends. She greeted Johnny and the rest of the gang at the vans after nipping back to her room to catch up with Steph and to change her clothes. “Missed you, baby,” Johnny cooed after kissing her passionately in front of everyone. “Knoxville, you literally saw her a half hour ago,” Dimitry groaned with a roll of his eyes. “And it was the longest, most miserable half hour he’s ever had, right PJ?” Ell joked, playfully smacking Johnny on the chest. “Ell, we love you but if this is what he’s gonna be like I’m kinda glad you’re not on set today,” Jeff admitted. “Nah, man, I wish she was. If he can’t go half an hour without her he’s only gonna be whining like a little bitch cuz she’s not around. Please come, Ell,” Dimitry begged.

Continue reading

#i have 0 memory of what gifs i've previously used for these posts so apologies for repeats lol #johnny knoxville #jackass #pj clapp #johnny knoxville fic #jackass fic #mtv jackass

[sparkypantaloons]

sm0l Jason Todd produces BIG angst

I'm so sorry. I know what it was you meant by this ask, but sm0l Jason turned into shrunken Jason and BIG angst turned into actual crack. Apologies. But enjoy - my first ever crack fic.

Red Hood's Barbie Dream House

Bruce pinches the bridge of his nose, takes a deep breath.

"I feel like you're not taking this seriously." He says.

"No, we are!" Dick assures him, still trying to suck his cheeks in and stop himself laughing.

"Very seriously." Steph adds, eyes wide and nodding.

"Fuck you." Jason says from where he sits on the medbay cot, his voice ridiculously high pitched. "Fuck all of you."

Dick and Steph double over laughing again, clinging to each other for support. Bruce can feel a headache coming on.

"You're a pair of assholes!" Jason squeaks again, and jumps down to the floor. He barely reaches Dick's knees, shrunken as he is by whatever spell hit him. But it doesn't stop him from sinking his teeth into his brother's leg.

Dick smirks, reaches down and picks Jason up by the scruff of his neck. "Didn't even feel that, bro."

Jason let's go a string of expletives, too high to be understood.

"Dick." Bruce says in a warning voice.

"Okay, okay." Dick relents, but he's still smirking. He places Jason down, inside one of the glass tanks they use for potentially toxic and/or exploding items. Jason is too small to get out. "There you go Jay, nice and safe."

Steph is crying with laughter at this point, Jason's tiny fists pounding on the glass.

"Wait wait wait!" Steph says, gathering herself. Then she pulls off one of her boots and yanks the sock off her foot. "A sleeping bag, Hood. So you don't get cold." She drops it in the tank.

"Enough." Bruce intones, rolling his eyes, as high pitched squeaking echoes off the walls of the tank. It's coupled with little 'plink' sounds as Jason kicks and punches the glass. He pinches the bridge of his nose. "Computer, call Zatanna."

~

The next day Steph shows up at the Manor, mid-afternoon. She's carrying a large box in her arms.

Bruce eyes it suspiciously. "What's going on?"

"Nothing." Steph smiles innocently, ponytail swinging. She walks through to the den. "Is Dick here?"

Bruce follows her, eyes on the box. "He's just picking Damian up from school."

Steph is looking far too pleased with herself. She plonks the box down on the coffee table. "And where's Jason?" She asks sweetly.

Bruce feels a headache coming on. "He's in the library."

Steph gives him a wicked smile. "I brought him some things." She says, then pulls an old Barbie Dream House out of the box.

"Stephanie..." Bruce starts and he doesn't know if he's chastising her or begging her.

"What?" She shrugs. "A little man needs a little house." She says, as though it were obvious.

Bruce picks up the sign that's been attached to the roof. Hand painted in big red letters. 'Red Hood's safe house. Keep out.' He raises his eyebrows.

Steph tries to hold back a grin. Busies herself with setting out the little table and chairs and bed.

Bruce sighs. "I'll be in the Cave."

~

"Bruce!" Jason's high pitched voice, squeaks through the comm. "Bruce, I swear I will murder your children in their sleep!"

"Please murder me first." Bruce mutters to himself.

"What?" Jason shrills.

"Nothing." Bruce says brightly. "What's wrong?"

Jason has been Barbie-sized for three days now, with no choice but to let the magic wear off, according to Zatanna. Though Bruce can't help but wonder if that's because she's still annoyed Batman banned her rabbits from the Watchtower. Either way, Jason is stuck dressing in Tim's old G. I. Joe's clothes for a few more days at least. And Bruce is stuck enduring the consequences.

Once upon a time he would have been thrilled at the thought of having Jason home for even an afternoon, let alone an entire week. Now, Bruce almost regrets insisting that Jason stay at the Manor until he returned to normal. For what his son now lacks in size, he is making up for in rage.

Unsurprisingly, the rest of Bruce's children are utterly delighted.

Steph not only brought over her old Barbie Dream House (which Jason had proceeded to try and destroy before Tim put him in a vase "for a time out") she also brought over Barbie's pink convertible. Jason had spent the entire first battery charge driving it repeatedly into Tim's ankles.

Damian meanwhile, had found an old Buckaroo game up in the attic and had taken to challenging Jason to a demented sort of miniature rodeo. Often plonking his brother on the horse when he was least suspecting it. The last time it happened,  Jason had spent the rest of the day learning to ride Titus. Then had made the old dog charge straight at his ten year old owner, knocking him down everytime Damian left his room.

Tim, on the other hand, had come home one evening with an expensive looking dress box. Only to reveal a tiny, white wedding dress with attachable wings inside. "You can be this years Christmas fairy!" He had laughed, setting off the rest of his siblings.

Jason had been furious, but had already realised that kicking, punching and biting had no effect on his much larger siblings. Instead, he had waited until Tim was asleep, creeped up on the younger man's bed and unceremoniously yanked out a fistful of nose hairs. Tim's yelling had woken the whole house.

Worst of all had been Dick, who lost any sympathy he might have had within hours, and spent entire days seeing how much he could annoy Jason. If it wasn't challenging the tiny man to lift up various house hold objects ("I bet you can't lift this fork. I bet you can't pick up a cufflink. Bet you're too puny to carry a plum.") it was leaving him in precarious situations - to keep his skills sharp, apparently.

Bruce had put a stop to it, when one of the tests was Jason tied to the toy railway tracks with hair elastics.

Cass alone had seemed uninterested in riling Jason up, content to let him sit on her shoulder as she went about her day. (Jason had tried to suggest he sit on her head like the rat in that Disney film Bruce had hated, but had Cass looked as though she'd rather have an actual rat on her head).

It had all been going quite well and then, unsurprisingly, there had been a fall out. Bruce didn't even want to know what, but Cass had been so annoyed she'd put Jason on the top shelf of the library and left him there all day. Bruce has been required to wear a comm 24/7 now, so Jason can at least call for help if he needs it.

"B, are you even listening to me?" Jason shrieks.

"Sorry, Jay. What were you saying?"

"I said, you need to chase up my clothes order! I can't wear these cargo pants anymore. I'll just go naked Bruce, don't test me."

Bruce sighs. He's beginning to wonder if maybe he should just beg a favour off John Constantine, put a stop to all the nonsense.

~

By the eighth day, Jason is a tiny storm, in an actual tea cup. Fed up with being pint sized and the smallest in the family, he sits in a mug on Bruce's desk, glaring at his father.

"If you loved me you'd fix this." He says, for the ninth time.

Bruce tries not to growl, swings the screen to face his son. "Literally all I do is try and find solutions." He says irritably. Given how small Jason is, Bruce is desperate for some space.

"Some great detective you are." Jason sulks. "It's been eight days Bruce! Eight days and you—"

There's a sudden poof of smoke and clang of breaking crockery and then a full sized Jason sat on Bruce's desk. Stark naked.

Jason's eyes widen - half in glee, half in embarrassment.

Bruce crosses his arms. "You were saying?"

Jason gives an awkward grin. "Err... That I love you and you're the best and now please give me your pants?" He says, trying to at least maintain some dignity.

Bruce rolls his eyes, pulls a spare pair of trackies out of his desk drawer. He shrugs when Jason gives him a quizzical look. "I'm Batman." He says, by way of explanation.

"Great." Jason says, pulling them on quickly. His face turns dark. "Now where's Dick?" He asks. "He's a dead man."

Bruce pinches the bridge of his nose. He can feel another headache coming on.

#batfam #batfam fic #jason todd #spbfic #batfic #batfamily #bruce wayne #batdad #batfamily fanfic

[deepwithintheabyss]

A little look in some of my wips, no these aren't the only ones I have or even any that I am working on recently. This is just a random assortment of wips that have over a few 100 words

mostly posting this just for me but feel free to ask questions I guess

day 1 dicktim week: Undercover as a couple but they switched Omega/alpha designations to blend in

deaged Tim dad Jason: Tim gets deaged and looses all memories, some angst some fluff as Jason takes care of him

beta: Tim is a beta and dealing with what this implies in terms of getting scented, Jason notices

rock hard tension: dick massages Tim, they start talking and upon learning Tim is a virgin he takes some interest

rr tim rh tim: Red Robin Tim lands in a reserve Robin Universe

tentacles: The batboys (and girls?) have some "fun" with tentacles (against their will)

TimTim: Tim and (technically) Earth3 Tim meet after the Talon just killed Owlman, smut ensues

Bites of Love: Damian bites, a lot, Tim doesn't realize what it means until an employee teases him on the "fun night" he had

slatimjay: Slade and Tim fuck, Jason walks in on them and gets dragged into it

Slade: Slade gets hit by some substance that makes the alpha go wild, Tim uses his omega charms to distract him

Feral Alpha wooing Omega Jason: Tim is absolute besotted with Jason and tries to court him in so many ways while being basically nonverbal

Food: Tim starts to take care of Jason in the form of food and really loves how Jason's body changes

Ghost jay: Jason is a ghost twisted by the lingering emotions in the manor and he wants to lash out at the newest Robin, problem he can only really touch Tim when he's sexually active

JayTim Omega/Omega (I swear I have non Omegaverse ideas too) Jason is courting Tim the traditional omega way, but Tim thinks he's an alpha and doesn't realize

self care and other wishes: Jason wears lace as self care and Tim gets involved

werewolf jaytim: Tim is a werewolf that takes what he wants when Jason breaks into the Tower, what he wants? Jason of course

Milk: Tim is milking due to ivys pollen but he's more obsessed with Jason's tits than his own, they fuck

waffle prompt: JayTimSteph, Tim is crushing on fellow student, Steph takes one look at him and decides they should try and bring Jason into their relationship

Day 3 OJT week: Jason gets forced into a critical heat and has to either take a knot or get mated, luckily robin comes to the rescue

Sub Oral fixation: Tim accidentally slips into subspace while hanging out on Movie night with Dick, fluffy until Jason walks in the next day

Vampire Sequel: focus on Tim's situation as a newly turned vampire and a little surprise I won't mention here

Ravenous: Jason is really horny while patching Tim up and accidentally rubs his pussy all over Tim's legs, who's more than a little interested in getting his mouth on that

Vampire Tim: Tim deals with his hunger by going to clubs and finding someone to "fuck", Dick and Jason (for different reasons) are concerned about their baby bird throwing his life away like that and start to stalk and confront him

O!Jason and B!Tim: Jason goes into heat and Tim offers help not expecting Jason to fuck him suffice to say when he's pregnant a few months later he knows who the baby daddy is

+ of course a lot of other event week prompts

#the abyss speaks #my writing #my ideas

[greazyfloz]

JESUS THAT MICHAEL FIC WAS SO GOOOD!!! You need to write a second part to this! i might die if you don’t!!!

Two Years Pt.2 w/ Michael Bunting

Part 1

I drove around the city for an hour before deciding to call Steph. I reach down for my phone after pulling into a parking lot and notice the list of missed calls from Michael. I roll my eyes and unlock my phone and call Steph, ignoring Michael. 

“Hello?” I hear Steph answer on the other end of the phone

“Hey, can I crash in your spare?”

“Oh no” she says before she sighs, “of course you can”

We say our goodbyes and I make my way over to their house. I wasn’t too far, so I pulled into their driveway around 5 minutes later. Steph opens the door and I’m greeted by Zeus before I could even knock on the door.

“Hey” Steph says with a sad expression on her face as she opens the door wide inviting me in, “What happened?”

“Where’s Mitch?” I say looking around from where I can see then looking back at her before telling her what happened

“He went out with the guys, when you called I knew something was up since I wasn’t invited over”

“Wait, over? Like my- Michael’s place?”

“Michael’s place? You moved out?!” she questions

“Not yet” I say, making my way over and plopping down on the couch. Steph follows and starts rubbing my back as I lean forward and begin to cry into my hands. After my crying slows down enough for me to speak I explain what happened to Steph and she looks stunned. 

“What an idiot” she says. She reaches over for her phone and begins texting how I’m thinking is Mitch before looking back at me, “I’m so sorry for putting you in that situation”

“No don’t be, you didn’t say it maliciously. It was jokes, his ego was just hurt” I explain

“Do you think you are moving out, like for real?”

“I don’t know” I say shaking my head, “We fight randomly about stuff but never like that. I love him and that’s not something I can stop doing but I don’t know if he loves me back”

“How so?” Steph asks before her phone buzzes catching her attention for a second before looking back at me to continue

“I know I signed up for this life dating him but it’s always him, him, him. His hockey and his life come first, and during the season I guess that is fine, but my birthday?! How do you forget the person you are suppose to love’s birthday, especially when you have already talked to her about it a couple days before?”

Steph takes a deep breath and before she could speak her phone starts buzzing again but this time it was a call. 

“Hello?” she says answering it, “I can’t tal-”, “What?”, “Where are you?”, “Yeah she is here”, “uhuh”, “yeah” , “okay, I will try”, “bye, love you babe” she says on the phone then looks at me.

“Mitch?” I ask

“Yes” she says than stands up, “We have to go make a pick up”

“We are not picking them up”

“Y/n…”

“No Steph, they can Uber”

“Okay..” she says, then shoots Mitch a text.

We make our way down the hall and cuddle in the master bed watching christmas movies even though the holidays have already passed. The front door opens and I look over at Steph and she shrugs her shoulders, “looks like he got an Uber” she says

I can hear shuffling and multiple guys' voices before Steph stands from the bed. I recognize Michaels voice so I stand and follow her down the hall. I can hear the thick slurring voice of Michael and I stop to listen before entering the room. 

“I’m a fucking idiot” he slurs

“I know, you told me 5 times” Mitch says, “I’m going to get Y/n”

“She’s here?!”

“Yes, I told you that 5 times”

“She doesn’t like me right now”

“For good reason” Steph interrupts their conversation bringing both the boys' attention over to us. My eyes go wide as I make eye contact with Michael. He stumbles a little to stand up so Mitch pushes him back down onto the chair. 

“Y/n!” Michael says as I begin making my way over to him. I make it over just in time to steady him as he stands. I step away slightly as he reaches in closer to give me a hug but I keep my arm straighter, “No, I’m sorry please” he says. I turn away and look over at Mitch as he begins to speak.

“Want help putting him into the car?” Mitch asks and I nod as the two guys make their way out to my car. I say my goodbye to Steph before following them out to my car. I get in the driver’s seat as Mitch basically throws Michael in his seat and shuts the door before making his way over to my window. 

“Than-” I start but stop and look down at Michael’s hand on mine before pulling it away

“You know what, why doesn’t he just stay here tonight?” Mitch says

“Why did you even bring him here in the first place?” I ask him

“Well it was here, leaving him at the bar with Tone, or dropping him alone at yours. I figured this was safest bet, especially if we could get you two to talk”

“Yeah, let’s talk” Michael says, reaching for my hand again, but I swat him away once more. 

“Okay, well thank you I guess” I say to Mitch

“Text me when you get home!” he tells me as I roll my window back up and wave goodbye before leaving. 

“Can I say something?” Michael says as I drive down the streets of Toronto back to our apartment

“No, Mike. Please, I just really don’t want to go there tonight” I say to him as I push down on the blinker as we approach a stoplight. The car stops and I finally look over to see a sad Michael already looking at me. 

“I’m sorry” he says to me and I turn my head back to the road and press the gas pedal as the light turns green. I ignored him as I wasn’t sure if I was ready to forgive him. 

We arrived back to our apartment and I brought his arm over my shoulder to steady him as we walked into the apartment. I put him into bed before walking into the bathroom and getting ready myself. When I re-entered the room I noticed Michael sitting up in bed but he doesn’t say anything until I reach for the door. I was planning on sleeping in the spare room for the night and letting things just wait until the morning but Michael spoke up. 

“Please Y/n, I need you here with me”

“Mi-”

“Please” he says stopping me from rejecting him, “I love you, and I’ll quit tomorrow and become a firefighter or something if you stay with me” he continued making me giggle, he raised an eyebrow questioning my humor

“You won't do that” I smile at him and he smiles back

“No, I wouldn’t” he laughs, “but I’d do anything for you to just forgive me. I’ll never forget any of our plans again”

“That’s not what upset me tonight though. I was hurt yes but that was something I could have gotten over, the way you acted tonight scared me Michael” I say making my way to the other side of the bed as I lifted the covers.

“I’m so sorry, I never ever wanted that. I love you” he says with soft eyes as he watches me get into bed with him. I don’t say anything back to him but snuggle myself into his chest after I had gotten myself situated under the sheets. He gently pulls my body closer to his then rests his mouth in my hair, “Does this mean we are good?” he says into my hair before giving my head a kiss. 

“For now”

#nhl fanfiction #nhl writing #nhl fic #nhl imagine #hockey imagines #michael bunting x reader #michael bunting