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reputationmunson · 1 year

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Delicate | S.H x fem!reader

summary: Steve can’t figure out why he’s so upset that you, his best friend, is going on a date until Robin gives him a reality check

content: fluff, friends to lovers, use of y/n, she/her pronouns, probably too cheesy and cliche

word count: 2.9K

a/n: honestly i didn’t have the energy to proofread this sorry for any mistakes!

Every Friday night, you and Steve can be found watching a movie in his basement, curled up on the couch with every snack imaginable scattered around you. Yes, it’s simple, maybe even mundane to some, but there’s nowhere else the two of you would rather be.

Steve has been your best friend since you were nine. You’d stuck by each other through everything. Even during his ‘king steve’ phase, you never strayed from him. Sure, things were different at that time, but you knew the sweet boy you met on the playground was still in there somewhere. He just needed someone to coax that side of him back out and that person just happened to be you.

Everyone always speculated you two were more than friends. Your parents constantly joked that in a few years you’d be married with a house full of kids. Your friends always referred to you as ‘Mr. and Mrs. Harrington’, the kids called you ‘mom and dad’. Neither of you would correct anyone, but would laugh about it instead.

Despite what literally everyone in your life thinks, nothing romantic has ever happened between the two of you. Sure, you were both touchy and cuddly, but that’s normal between two best friends. You also might’ve had a crush on him freshman year of high school, but quickly got over it when you realized those feelings would never be reciprocated. But, you were so wrong, you just didn’t know it yet. Neither did Steve.

By the time the credits of the movie roll, you're half asleep with your head resting on his shoulder and his arm wrapped around you. You’ve never thought of the cuddling between you as being romantic. You just always felt so comfortable with Steve and he felt the same way around you. He had a way about him that made you feel safe and secure, like every time you were with him nothing bad could happen.

“Hey” Steve whispers, his hand gently rubbing up and down your arm “do you wanna stay tonight?”

“Mmhmm” you nod your head and look at him with a sleepy smile. “I’ll help you clean up” you offer and he shakes his head “We’ll clean up tomorrow. Who would steal all the blankets if you passed out from exhaustion down here?” he teases and you playfully roll your eyes and follow him up to his bedroom. “You’re the blanket thief and you know it, Harrington”

You and Steve have shared a bed more times than you can count. You’d fall asleep in his arms and wake up with your bodies intertwined. Sometimes, when he thinks you’re still asleep, he’ll press a soft kiss to your forehead. Which is normal for two people who were just friends… isn’t it?

“So, we got this move in at family video that looks super cheesy and awful. Wanna watch it tomorrow night?” he asks as you climb into bed next to him. “Oh, I meant to tell you about this earlier but I’m going on a date tomorrow!” you sound excited and he knows it sounds awful, but for some reason that makes his stomach churn. He tries to play it cool, anyway.

“A date, huh? Who ya ditchin’ me for, babe?” babe. He always calls you ‘babe’ or ‘honey’ or any sickeningly sweet pet name that never fails to make you feel flustered. “Brad Mckinley” you tell him and Steve has to hold back a scoff.

Brad McKinley? That asshole? Steve can’t believe you’d give him a second of your time, let alone a date.

“Really? He’s like a huge douchebag”

“How do you know? you go on a date with him?” you taunt.

“He wishes he could get a date with a babe like me. But, c’mon, seriously? He comes into the store all the time with a new girl on his arm and always acts like he’s, I don’t know, better than me. When did he even ask you out?”

“A few days ago. We were both at the supermarket and I almost ran into him in the parking lot with my shopping cart, so I apologized and he said he’d forgive me if I went on a date with him. I thought that was cute and thought he was ever cuter, so i said yes”

Wow, what a line, Steve thinks to himself. “Isn’t he known for having sex with girls and never talking to them again?”

“Steve, this is the first date I'm going on in forever. I don’t really get asked out often. Can’t you be happy for me?”

You do get asked out often, just not directly. Sometimes you and Steve will be out somewhere and guys will come up to him and once he says you aren’t his girlfriend, they try to get him to be his wingman. Steve always comes up with an excuse so they don’t talk to you, but now when you aren’t around, he’s started telling them that you are his girlfriend. He tells himself he only does it to protect, not because he wants you to be his girlfriend. That would be crazy.

“If you’re happy then I am, I guess. Anyways, i’m like super fucking tired. let’s go to bed” you can’t tell if his tone is from being upset or tired, but you brush it off and close your eyes after curling up to him and telling him goodnight.

Steve doesn’t sleep much that night. He’s too worried about you. You’re loving and shy. Soft spoken and kind. Sometimes too kind. He worries your kindness might be taken advantage of and he refuses to let that happen. Ever.

Saturday rolls around and Steve has been sulking all day. He was a little awkward with you this morning before you left. You tried to ask him multiple times if he was okay before you left and he blamed his behavior on being tired, so you let it go. When you left, he told you to have fun on your date, but it came out more sarcastic than intended.

“What is your deal, dude? You have a look on your face like someone stuck a lemon in your mouth while you were sleeping” Robin says and Steve’s brows furrow more than they have been all day. “What the hell does that even mean?”

“It means that you’re acting weird. Weirder than usual” she states and Steve sighs “y/n is going on a date”

“And that’s a problem because you’re in love with her? Right?”

“I am not in love with her! She’s going on a date with Brad Mckinley and I’m just worried about her. As a friend” He adds the last part to make himself perfectly clear, but Robin still isn’t convinced. “You’re jealous” she states as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Which it is to everyone, but Steve.

“That’s crazy. She’s my best friend”

“No. I’m your best friend. She’s your girlfriend without the label”

“That’s ridiculous. She-” Steve starts to defend himself, but Robin interrupts him. “No, it’s not. Just think about it, okay? You two cuddle all the time, you hold her hand when she’s feeling nervous, and you let her touch your precious hair but if anyone else tried to do that you’d swat their hand away. That’s all boyfriend and girlfriend stuff. She even sits on your lap, your lap, Steve.”

He’s left speechless. He’s not in love with you, is he? Steve knows his friendship with you isn’t as conventional as others, but neither of you thought it was unusual. If anything, it would be unnatural if there were no innocent touches between the two of you or glances at each other from across the room that resulted in what can only be described as lovesick smiles. Steve thinks he’d die if he could never hold you again the way he does now. But, you’re going on a date. With someone else.

This guy could end up being your boyfriend who will get to be the one to hold you, you’ll play with his hair, and grab his hand in a crowded room when you’re feeling overwhelmed and Steve will have to watch from the sidelines, wishing that was him. Fuck, he wants that to be him. Forever.

“Holy shit, you’re realizing it aren’t you?” Robin grins and Steve feels the past twelve years of feelings he’s repressed and dismissed come crashing down on him all at once. He’s been so hopelessly and desperately in love with you all this time and it terrifies him. You are the best thing that's ever happened to him. What if he loses you? He couldn’t bear not having you in his life. He’d never recover.

“Holy shit” he breathes out “I love her. I’m fucking in love with her. Why didn’t you guys tell me!” he shouts. Good thing the store was dead. “We thought you knew!” she shouts back. “You have to tell her. Like, immediately”

“I can’t do that” he grumbles, feeling defeated before he’s already tried. “What if she doesn’t feel the same? I mean, I know she doesn’t. There's no way”

“You cannot be that much of an idiot. Do you not see the way she looks at you? You should hear the way she talks about you when you’re not around. Last week when you were late to the get together because you had to work, she was all worried and kept asking what time it was. We could literally talk about ice cubes and she’d find a way to relate the story to you. It’s kinda nauseating, but cute, too”

“You really think she feels the same way?” Steve lights up at the thought of there being even a one percent chance that you love him the way he loves you. “It’s sort of hard to not pick up on when I’ve been watching you idiots make heart eyes at each other every time we all hang out. When does she leave for her date?” Steve checks his watch “An hour. I don’t get off work for three hours, so that’s just great” he complains.

“I’ll cover for you. Go get your girl”

Steve races to your house. Speed limit be damned, he’s not letting anything stop him. His shaky hands grip the steering wheel and he’s so nervous that he’s debated stopping a couple times to puke on the side of the road.

What is he even going to say to you? ‘Hey, I know you’re going on a date but I’ve been in love with you for most of my life. Wanna be my girlfriend?’yeah, that’s not gonna cut it. You deserve flowers, or a poem, or a goddamn flashmob, but, unfortunately, he doesn’t exactly have the time to get a group together for a choreographed dance that declares his feelings, so he’ll have to rely on speaking from the heart. That shouldn’t be too difficult…right?

Despite being on a time limit, he’s been sitting outside your house for ten minutes. He can’t seem to move. The fear of rejection and all of this happening so fast has his head spinning. Robin's words echo in his mind and he musters up just enough courage to find his way to your front door, knocking frantically.

“Steve? Shouldn’t you be at work?” your voice is shaky and your eyes are red. You’ve been crying. He’s going to fucking kill that guy. “y/n, what’s wrong?” his eyes soften and his heart constricts. You invite him inside and he follows you to the living room, taking a seat next to you.

“Um, Brad cancelled our date because Missy Tucker asked him out” you laugh, humourlessly. Steve is furious and hates to see you upset, but he can’t help but take this as a sign. Here he was, prepared to stop you from going on that date and all along the universe was on his side. He’s gonna have to send Missy Tucker a thank you card right after he eggs Brad’s beloved car.

“Shit, babe. I’m sorry.” his arm drapes around your shoulder and you melt into his touch. “It’s fine. I didn’t think he was my soulmate or anything. I just wanted to feel pretty and wanted, I guess” you nervously fiddle with Steve’s hand, feeling embarrassed at your admission.

Steve gently grabs your hand, giving it a soft squeeze. “You are pretty and you are wanted”

“I don’t think I am” you whisper. “Are you kidding? You’re the prettiest girl in Hawkins. Shit, probably the world. The nicest, too. You’re always there for me, even when I was an asshole and I don’t know if I’ve ever even thanked you for that. Oh, and you’re funny too, like in a really witty way ‘cause you’re so smart-”

“Steve” you interrupt his endearing ramble “thank you, but you have to say those things. You’re my best friend”

He positions himself on the couch so he can look at you, putting his hand under your chin to tilt your head up so he can see your beautiful eyes. When he looks at you, it’s like he's seeing you for the first time. You aren’t just the girl he met a recess that’s been attached to his hip ever since. You’re the girl that makes him feel on top of the world whenever he’s with you. You’re the girl whose touch makes him putty in your hands. You’re who he sees a future with and he can’t believe it took him this long to figure out.

“Best friend or not, it’s true. All of it” he promises. “Then why has no one ever loved me? Like, been in love with me.”

“You’re wrong” he insists. “Like, really wrong” he huffs out a laugh and you give him a puzzled expression. “When you told me about your date I felt kinda weird about it and I thought I was just being a good friend, ya know? But I think it’s more than that…”

You feel like you’ve stopped breathing. Is he going to say what you think he is? You never thought that he’d feel this way about you. You always believe the feelings you held for him were one-sided, so you pushed it down and replaced them with gentle touches and acts of kindness in hopes that maybe those things could lead to more, but they never did. Not until now.

“What do you mean?” you ask softly. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“I want you to tell me. I need to hear it, Steve. Please”

He takes a deep breath before speaking up again “I wanna give you the huge declaration you deserve. Something like standing outside your window with a boombox and a dozen flowers that are as pretty as you, but I don’t have any of that. I could sing though, if you want?” he jokes and you giggle. “Not necessary. I, um, could go first if you’re nervous” you suggest, even though you don’t think you’ve ever been so nervous in your life. “Yeah, I’d like that”

“I love you, Steve. In fact, I can’t remember a time in my life when I didn’t love you. I don’t need an over the top announcement. I just need to know you feel the same way” You keep your confession simple because the only thing you want to do is shout from the top of your lungs how much you love him.

“I love you too. So much that it’s crazy and scares me a little. I even accidentally flew past a stop sign on my way over here”

“You did not’’ you gasp. “I did and I’d do it again. For you”

He’s looking at you like he has a million times before, but this time it’s different. His eyes flicker down to your lips and you do the same. “Can you kiss me, Stevie?” Fuck, he loves it when you call him that. It makes him weak in the knees, just like everything else that you do.

He lays a hand on your cheek and gives you the cutest grin you’ve ever seen. You both lean in and when he kisses you, you feel lightheaded and giddy. Neither of you can stop smiling, making it difficult to kiss and you both laugh.

“Stop smiling, goof. I wanna kiss you” he whines. “I can’t help it! I’m too happy” you squeal and he practically tackles you, overwhelmed with joy. You lay on the couch with him on top of you, his weight slightly crushing you, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. “Wanna try again?” he nose nudges yours and you cradle his head to gently pull him closer to you as his lips glide over yours in a perfect balance.

Of course, there’s sparks and fireworks, but you also feel at peace. This kiss feels like coming home. You’re right where you’ve always meant to be.

“Do you wanna be my girl?” he asks once he slightly pulls back from you. His face is still very close to yours and you swear that his eyes are shimmering. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted”

Steve tells you at least one hundred times that night that he loves you and you tell him the same. You don’t think you’ll ever get tired of hearing or saying those three words. They just sound so beautiful being muttered in between endless kisses.

the end

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington one shot #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington friends to lovers #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington #stranger things fic

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sei-rq · 10 months

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Shameless, big brother (NSFW)

synopsis: step bro childe has a teeny tiny crush on his step sister

warnings: stepcest, size kink (if you squint), power kink, non-con/dub con, dark content, fem!bimbo!reader, ajax is mean but sweet

He is breathing heavy.. you can even feel his heart beating rapidly at this point.. Ajax your step-brother is currently buried deep inside you, how did you end up like this exactly? to be honest, you don’t really remember and you don’t really seem to care, neither does he..

He came to visit his family and siblings in Snezhnaya, only having to realize that his father and mother were no longer together, what a pleasant surprise.. turns out his father had moved on and married your mother literally after a month , at the time Ajax didn’t even know you were in the picture, he just assumed that a wretched woman had seduced his father and was living off his money.

At first he was very cold towards you and your mother, soon realizing it wasn’t really either of you guys’ fault, it was that his mother and father failed at love even after so many years of vowed marriage, he had expected your mother to be rude and annoying but it was far from it, she had treated his siblings and him as her own children and loved them all dearly..

That was until he had met you that he felt his first tick, you were annoying, you were so fucking annoying.. he hated you, he hated how nice you were to him, how you always had a sweet smile on your face, how your face always lit up when he came home, he hated all of it, and most importantly he hated how you so innocently called him “ni-ni” almost as though you were poking fun at him, the nickname annoyed him the most.. mainly because it’d make his blood run to his cock instantly after having heard it.

Hahah.. fuck, The Childe Tartaglia, eleventh of the fatui.. had a massive crush on his step sister, fucking disgusting.. but that’s why he loved it.. it felt so fucking taboo and that’s why it felt so fucking good.. oh how poor Ajax has fucked his fist countless times thinking of you, fucking you so so good, “ah- angh ahh.. fuck” curses after curses would fall from his mouth as he imagined the most erotic scenes he’d like to recreate with you

so when one night he visited Snezhnaya as a surprise, he had snuck into your room, seeing you in nothing but a lousy white tank-top and a pair of cute pink panties, okay.. now you were just asking for this

Your lovely “ni-ni” had wasted no time in locking the bedroom door and tying your hands with a little handkerchief he keeps in his left pocket, you were so dumb and clueless, sleeping so soundly unaware of what was going to happen to you

The red head had ripped off the panties and had stuck a finger inside of you effortlessly, don’t mind him, he has lots and lots of experience when it comes to things like this.. for some reason though you had felt too tight to stretch out, was this seemingly your first time...?

You jolted awake, looking around aimlessly but surely afraid of what was going on.. “n-ni- mMhp-” before you could let another sound out, Ajax clasped his free hand over your mouth.. “Shh.. it’s fine, big brother will take good care of you” he was already so fucking hard and turned on by this.. he knows this is wrong and he shouldn’t be doing this, and definitely not to his step-sister, yet seeing how easily he is overpowering someone so weak and small turned something on within him, he is really shameless isn’t he?

“MMm!! Ugnh!!” helpless and desperate.. god you were so pathetic right now,but don’t you worry!! big brother Ajax will surely take very good care of you, maybe even spoil you after this session with him, with all the luxury one could possibly want.. all you have to do is be a good girl and let him do whatever he wants with you..

#childe x reader #ajax smut #childe smut #genshin smut #genshin x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin x y/n #n0nc0n #cw stepcest #cw r@pe

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batneko · 13 days

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for the last couple days I've been thinking about a Dungeon Meshi AU with the girl version of Laios from the magic mirror bonus page. Like, let's say she got married at 16, and ten years and two kids later she's escorting her youngest to magic school and planning to visit with Falin for a couple days before heading home. She finds out Falin and Marcille (I can't decide if everybody should be gender-swapped or only Laios. If Falin is The Boy he'd probably be expected to become village chief despite having creepy ghost magic, but maybe Laios's husband turned out to be a good leader so there's an unspoken "if Falin doesn't come back would that really be so bad?" among the villagers. But if Falin and Marcille are still girls that could lead to some interesting Deconstructing Gender Norms stuff. I just don't know!) have been planning to go to The Island and study a real dungeon, and instantly flips from quiet and demure (masking HARD) to excited and full of energy, and Marcille asks why Laios doesn't just come along. It'll only be a few months, both kids are in boarding schools, won't her husband understand?

The answer to that is no, but Laios has been dreading going back home for exactly the reason that it'll just be her and her husband now, no more kids as a buffer. She'll have nothing to do but take care of the house and be a Good Wife. Her husband isn't a bad person, but he's never understood her and never bothered to try, he just gets frustrated that she can't remember their guests' names, that she only wants to talk about "weird" things, that she cares more about her letters from Falin than she does taking care of her appearance.

Laios lets just enough of this slip that Marcille misunderstands and thinks her husband is a brute, and Falin has always known that being a housewife didn't suit Laios at all, so neither of them argue when Laios decides to abandon her marriage with only a brief letter back home.

On the trip Laios starts to learn magic, but she turns out to take to combat even better. Her encyclopedic (literally, it all comes from encyclopedias) knowledge of monster anatomy means she'll have the best chance out of the three of them at physically fighting things off if they can't find a trustworthy fighter to hire. But overall she's responsible for organizing their supplies and planning the expeditions. Having experience running a household comes in handy!

Of course, the three of them are pretty naive, and they run through Marcille's savings faster than expected, but they're all so interested in the dungeon that they're willing to stick out the tough times. Laios is so happy to finally be able to Be Herself around people that she starts talking about cooking and eating monsters without realizing that's a step too far for most folks. Falin is, of course, completely supportive, but Marcille and Namari shut it down most of the time. (I'm not sure where Shuro is or if he should be gender-swapped as well. Chilchuck wouldn't join the party until they've become successful enough to pay his rates. If he's gender-swapped this is her way of dealing with an empty nest.) However one day Senshi happens to overhear Laois talking about it while they pass each other and they become fast friends. Marcille isn't sure if s/he wants Laios's obsession with monsters-as-food to continue, but can't resist encouraging this because forbidden love affairs are peak romance. But no they're genuinely just friends and the thought never crosses either of their minds.

Marcille has no idea Laios has actually already had a couple of extramaritals with orc men.

(that's all I got so far!)

#I'm not sure about Kabru either. should he be a man and try to flirt with Laios and be baffled when it sails over her head?#or a woman and try to initiate a Gal Pals relationship with Laios which ALSO sails over her head #at least until Kabru learns about the monster thing and expresses interest then ohhhh no you're stuck with her now Kabru what have you done #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi au #genderswap au #laios touden #falin touden #marcille donato

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auroracalisto · 1 year

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good enough

bradley "rooster" bradshaw x gn!reader, 8k words tw: MAJOR MISCOMMUNICATION TROPE. divorce, cussing (lots of f bombs at some point), lots of arguing, angst, at one point, reader is said to have had depression before. the reader and bradley are both idiots and neither one of them can properly deal with shit. macho man rooster ends up letting fear gets the best of him and he literally ruins his own life bc of it LMAO, possibly ooc if you squint, possibly questionable actions when it comes to friends, this is dramatic as hell (and i loved every minute of it), self-doubt, angry characters, regret is strong here, rooster fears death and makes it a personality trait™ a/n: based on the song "good enough" by maisie peters. sorry for all of the tws, but i just wanted to try and mark all the boxes. but fr i love bradley. this is purely a play on the song i named, and is just a piece of fiction. a dramatic piece of fiction. like literally take rooster and place him in some angsty romance novel, but cut out the smut. that's this. i am also so sorry for the length of this. i just... started going and i couldn't stop. LMAO

Your heart lurched to your throat as you stood there, his head turned away from your lips—he was avoiding your touch. He didn’t have to say it for you to realize it.

You hesitantly smiled, backing down. Maybe he just had a bad day. It happened pretty often, so taking it personally wouldn’t have benefited you in any way.

He was your favorite person, and you knew you were his. You two were best friends until the end of time. That’s how it had been since even before you two got married—that’s how it would stay.

The television that sat in the living room had long since been turned off. The fan perched in the corner of the room silently hummed along, providing little relief to the California heat that plagued your home.

"Rooster," you began, rubbing the back of your neck. Sweat stuck to the palm of your hand, and you grimaced as you quickly wiped your hand off on the seat of your pants. "How was your day? I know it's been busy—"

"—we need to talk," he said, cutting you off.

He didn't even give you a chance to question things as he walked past you, sitting down on the sofa in your shared condominium. You blinked slowly at your husband, but you gave a small nod. Your feet moved on their own accord as you sat beside him. You placed a hand on his knee, and he only pulled himself away from you.

You swallowed thickly, nerves getting the best of you. Had you done something to offend him recently? Did something happen with Maverick again? You had thought they were doing well—the videos Natasha had sent you were proof enough of that. It warmed your heart to know that he was finally finding himself in this crazy world.

Maybe it was just hot. Yes, that’s it. The heat was getting to him. It had been getting to everyone on base, and at work. It wouldn’t surprise you if it was the same thing here.

"Bradley…?" You said nothing more than his name, watching him with nothing but pure adoration behind your eyes. He meant the world to you. There was nothing he could say or do to change this, even if he was avoiding you.

The man looked at anything but you. His dark brown eyes stared at the black television, and then they moved to the grey carpet just beneath his boot-clad feet.

You must have just vacuumed. He could see the indentations, and that’s what he chose to focus on as he searched for the right words to say. But they never came.

"I want a divorce," he said.

It was so simple. Those four words.

And just like that, your world came crashing around you.

Where was this coming from? Did you do something to upset him?

The words swirled around in your brain, repeating over and over until it hit you like a freight train, knocking the air from your chest. He wants a divorce.

You sat on the edge of the black sofa, eyes fluttering shut as you took in a deep breath. Your hands rested in fists on top of your thighs as you wracked your mind for an explanation. You couldn't find one.

There was nothing that could justify whatever this was.

How long had he been thinking about this?

"Where… where is this coming from?" you asked. You just had to know.

"I don't want to talk about it. Just… please."

"What?" You looked up at him in disbelief. "You—you want to divorce me but you won't even give me a reason?" you asked. Your eyes burned as you held back your tears. You couldn't cry. Not now. If you cried that first tear, then surely, they would never stop.

"I have never asked you for anything, Y/n. Please, just say yes.”

"I don't understand where this is coming from, Bradley," you said, reaching forward to take ahold of his hand. "Please. Talk to me. I want to understand what's going on."

Rooster clenched his jaw, looking down at your hands. Your wedding band glinted in the soft glow of the light overhead. The beautiful piece glared at him as he fought to find the right words to say—but nothing he could say would make this better. Not now.

The words left him without a second thought.

"I don't love you."

Oh.

Oh, no.

No, no, no. He couldn't be serious. He couldn't be telling you the truth right now. He did love you. He married you! Why would he ever ask you to marry him if he didn't love you?

Why would you plan your life together if he didn’t love you?

But even though you could create more and more questions in your mind, trying to placate every emotion coursing through your veins, nothing made sense.

You pulled your hand away as your tears finally began to fall. If he didn't love you, you wouldn't force him to be with you any more than he wanted.

Rooster inwardly grimaced, but he wasn’t about to let you see that. He needed to be strong—he needed to save face and keep on digging in the same grave he had started.

"Just… just tell me when."

"When what?"

"When did this happen? When did you fall out of love? I—I thought you loved me, Bradley. I love you."

He pursed his lips. He seemed to hesitate as he allowed his eyes to meet yours. Rooster's blood rushed to his ears, and his fingers itched to grab onto something. To grab onto you. But he couldn’t. He couldn't even look at you properly when you looked so sad, but he forced himself to do so anyway. You deserved that, at least. You deserved to be looked at when he was ending the relationship you fought so hard to keep.

"I don't know. It just… happened."

He was lying. He had to be lying. There was no way he was being honest—he loves you. He loves you, and this was all just some bad dream. Some bad joke that Hangman put him up to. Maybe Fanboy was in on it, too. Surely, someone put him up to this. They had money in a bowl somewhere, waiting for your reaction so they would know who won. He’d whip out his phone soon and text them the result.

But the way he looked at you… you knew he was telling you the truth. He wanted a divorce. This was happening, whether you wanted it to or not. There was no cruel bet, no ulterior motive.

This was happening.

Every moment of the past three years pierced your brain—Bradley asking you out in the middle of the Hard Deck. Meeting his friends. Picking out your wedding rings. Becoming Y/n Bradshaw. The kisses you shared. The whispered conversations, the happy smiles, the—

He was your life. He is your life. You love him more than life itself.

But he loved you.

Loved. Past-tense.

He did love you. Something changed. What had changed?

You abruptly stood up, roughly wiping your tears away. You couldn’t do this. You couldn’t be near him right now. Your heart was far too heavy, weighed down by the immense burden of his confession.

"Alright," you said. "I… I won't force you to stay with me. I would never do that to you, Bradley. I would… I would never, ever want you to do anything you don’t want to do.” You held back a sob, fists balled at your sides. “We can get a divorce."

Relief spread across his face. He couldn't smile, though. This ended up being a lot harder than he expected it to be.

"Thank you," he said. He stood up, towering over you like usual. "I appreciate it."

You gave a curt nod, averting your gaze. Your tongue poked out, nervously wetting your lips as you cleared your throat. He appreciated it.

Were you just a joke to him?

"I will… I will make arrangements. I will leave by next week."

"What? You don't have to do that. There's no rush—"

"—I'll leave by next week," you cut him off, no longer looking at him.

What was he doing? You didn’t need this. You didn’t need him. As you took a step forward, the tears began to fall. Your husband forced himself to stay put as you rushed off to your bedroom, slamming the door shut behind you.

You found little comfort in the blankets that now surrounded you, tears wetting the pillow on which you rested your head night after night. You found little comfort in the place you spent with your husband, time after time, lamenting how much you loved each other. Planning the future of your life—of your family. Of your relationship that should have only grown in love.

The memories of this bed burned in the back of your mind. You could hardly breathe as the sobs plowed through your body.

This wasn’t fair.

This couldn’t be real.

Rooster slowly sat back down, burying his face in his hands. His elbows dug into his thighs, a choked sob catching in the back of his throat. He couldn’t believe he allowed himself to say that to you. It was far from the truth. But there was nothing he could do about it now.

This was for the best.

This would keep you safe.

As the sun peered through the grey curtains, setting just beyond the horizon, Rooster stood up. He wiped his tears away, instantly hardening. He had done this time and time again. He would hide, folding back into himself like a metal chair—he’d be there for people when he was needed, but he would be just out of the way until then. He wouldn’t bother you any longer than he needed to.

This was for the best—you wouldn’t have to live your life wondering what could have been.

If he died, that was that. You would move on, and he could rest peacefully in the afterlife.

His father hadn’t ever given his mother a chance to do something like that. He wouldn’t be making the same mistake.

Three years had passed.

Three, long and grueling years had inched by, taking your misery along with you. The New Year would pass over and over, and the only thing you would write on your resolution list was: Move on.

But you never could. That list ended up in the garbage only weeks after drafting it up.

How could you when the love of your life left as he did? How could you when you knew he was the only thing that kept you going, even if you were hundreds of miles away?

They would never say it out loud, but your friends never quite said anything about why he divorced you—why he fell out of love. But why would he tell them something like that? Rooster generally kept to himself. It wasn't something that he would have been very honest about, to begin with.

You knew they knew something more, but they never said anything. You never expected them to, either. They were your friends as much as they were his, and they had been his friend for far longer. You couldn't blame them. Whatever they knew—that was his business. But you kept silent, allowing yourself to wallow in self-pity for more than you should have.

But just like you couldn't blame them for keeping his secrets… who could blame you?

You had your own life before Rooster, yes, you did. You didn’t depend on him. You were independent, and you had your own interests and everything. You didn’t need him. But with his confession, it was as if everything you had ever known had been tossed out of the window of a speeding car in an instant, shattering against the run-down pavement. Pieces flew everywhere—you'd never be able to find them again, let alone put them back together.

You'd never have enough glue for something like that.

You would never be able to repair the gaping hole that was in your heart.

And you knew it was silly. You shouldn’t have ever let yourself trust someone so completely. But you never thought something like that would happen. Rooster was so easy to love.

He was such a happy person—he exuded confidence. He was the epitome of an amazing human being. And yet, he still fell out of love with you.

You never believed someone could just fall out of love so easily.

So, instead of remaining in the very place you felt like you were sinking in, you did what you thought was best. You packed your things and moved to Virginia. At least there, you'd be far enough away that he'd never find you. The mileage did little to comfort you, but it was something.

At least here, you felt like you could breathe.

Changing from the west coast to the east coast was drastic—but you adapted. You had to. You couldn't continue living in the very place that was threatening you at every given minute. You couldn’t continue on in a place where at every corner, something reminded you of him. It was driving you into a familiar depression—one that you had known before Rooster, and one that you would now know after Rooster.

When you left, Phoenix was devastated. Other than Bob, you were her closest friend. She never stopped talking to you—she never stopped being friends with you, even when you moved across the country. When Phoenix asked you to come in to visit, you hesitated. But then she promised you that Rooster wouldn't be there. That he would be visiting some family he had up north—his girlfriend's family. He would be using this free time to get to know them better.

You wouldn't say you were happy for him. Hell, that was far from the truth. Despite the fact you no longer wore your ring on your finger, it was always on a chain around your neck. Your heart still beats for him, no matter how many times you had tried to move on. And you did it all. You tried everything that Google said to do. One night stands, going out with strangers, having people set you up, hell, you even tried therapy. But it never worked.

Why would it? Rooster was the love of your life. He was the one you had seen yourself dying with—he was the one you wanted to grow old with. And he didn't want that in you. He didn't see the same things.

He didn’t see your relationship as a rising sun just beyond the mountain tops. He was already there with the setting sun, disappearing beyond the horizon. He had been there, at the end of your relationship, far before you even had a chance to find the middle. He had made peace with the end. You couldn’t even find peace in the beginning.

After much pestering and a FaceTime call from both Phoenix and Bob, you were convinced to join them back in California for a week. But your only condition was that Phoenix would be paying half for your plane ticket. She agreed in a heartbeat.

So that's why you stood here now, in front of the old dormitory in which you used to visit your friends in. You had already been to the hotel you'd be staying at, and you took a taxi to the base.

The grey building towered over you, making you feel far smaller than you actually were. Memories sat behind those walls, waiting for you to relive them, even if you didn’t want to.

It only took one text message to Natasha before she came barreling down the sidewalk, pulling you into a bone-crushing hug. Bob was not far behind, and Hangman was taking his sweet ole time. You didn't know he'd be around, but you felt better knowing he was—you had been close before Rooster sent in the papers. He helped you pack and get your things to Virginia.

You hugged Phoenix tightly, smiling up at her.

"It's been too long!" she nearly shouted, excitement running through her body. As she pulled away, Bob pulled you into a hug. He greeted you as he had so many times, with a hug and a simple ‘hello.’

Last but not least, Hangman sent you a smile. He pulled you into a hug, despite the fact he used to be one of the last people you would expect it from. You melted into the hug, unable to stop yourself from smiling.

"It's… it's good to be back. I'm glad to see you guys."

"Coyote, Payback, and Fanboy are already at the bar. Said they'd just meet us there. You ready?" Phoenix grinned.

You were as ready as you would ever be. You gave a small nod to your friend, and before you knew it, you were on your way to the very place you met your ex-husband. The Hard Deck.

It was suffocating, standing in that corner all alone. Your friends played pool, and you watched as the different colored balls sunk into the pockets that lined the edge. Hangman stood off to the side, beating some stranger in darts.

Rooster had always been good at that.

Lost in your mind like you had been so many times before, the sound of a glass falling at the bar made you jump.

And then you saw him. Your own glass slipped through your fingertips, crashing onto the floor. Shards littered the wood floor. Phoenix yelped your name in surprise, coming to your side immediately.

"What's wrong?" she asked, placing a hand on your arm to try and comfort you. You continued to stare, and she eventually looked in the direction of your gaze. Her eyes widened in surprise, lips parting as she tried to find something to say.

He wasn't supposed to be here. He wasn't supposed to be anywhere near you.

And he was looking right at you.

"Y/n, it's okay, he's not—"

You pulled your arm away from Phoenix, taking a couple of steps back before you took off running in the direction of the restrooms. It was as good of a hiding spot as anywhere, and you'd be able to collect yourself before going back out there. You couldn’t possibly run past him—he’d stop you. Or at least, try to follow you. Phoenix would make him leave. Surely, she wouldn't just let him stay.

You locked yourself in a stall, sitting down on the toilet seat. You took in a deep, releasing a shaky breath as tears clouded your vision. A hand pressed to your mouth, elbows digging into the meat of your thighs as you tried to keep yourself calm.

This wasn't happening! She promised he wasn't here. Why would she lie?

Maybe she didn't know.

The bright light in the bathroom was far too much.

The dripping water from the sink struck the porcelain—plip, plip, plip.

The noise from the bar was deafening as you sat there, chest heaving as you tried to catch your breath. Loud voices echoed through the building, striking your ears in an instant. But the more you cried, the more your sobs became the only thing you heard.

It had been ages since you cried over him, so why now? Why were you so triggered by just seeing him?

You tried to calm yourself down but to no avail.

You loved him. You love him. You never stopped. You couldn't just stop.

You tried so hard. You spent years trying to forget the man who ripped your heart in two with four simple words.

But the universe had a funny way of working. It seemed to work against you in every way possible, no matter what.

You could never win.

You would never win.

No matter what, you were never good enough.

You hadn't been good enough in school. You weren't good enough at work. And you hadn't been good enough for Rooster, even when you were married. You weren't good enough for him, now, either.

There was a knock at the bathroom door before you heard it creak open. Your breath hitched in your throat as you tried to keep quiet, choked sobs caught in your chest.

Worn shoes popped up underneath the stall door you found refuge in. Those same damn shoes you bought him once for Christmas, four years ago. He had been so excited—they were almost the exact same pair his mother had bought him one year for his birthday. His father's favorite brand—his favorite style of shoe.

God, you searched everywhere for those damn shoes.

And he kept them.

Silence enveloped the bathroom, save for your stifled sobs. You rested your shoulder against the old paneled walls, squeezing your eyes shut as you tried to ignore him. But he knew you were there. It was far too late, now.

Rooster stood there, fist raised to knock on the stall door. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. What would he even say? What would have been good enough?

Three years had come and gone without you. Three long years in which he felt as if he was drowning, just existing. He would have been better off launching himself into that ocean, the same as his father. His wedding band was stuffed away in some kind of pocket, always near him or on his person in some way. He tried to get over you—one-night stands, blind dates, even going as far as asking Hangman to find him a girl.

It worked, for a while.

He started dating Kristie—a sweet woman who worked as a nurse on base. But she saw right through him. She knew who he was, and what was going on in that head of his.

She wasn't mad—a bit disappointed, yes, but it didn't stop her from breaking up with him and canceling their planned vacation up north together.

She wasn’t you. She would never be you.

And he didn’t think he would ever see you again.

Rooster found himself in the middle of the Hard Deck, never once expecting you to be there. None of the Dagger Squad had said anything about you. He didn't know you were even going to be in town.

He felt like he couldn't breathe when he laid eyes on you.

The yellow lighting cast a soft glow on your skin. You were beautiful. You had always been beautiful, but damn, you looked even more beautiful now. Maybe it was just the years that had passed him by.

The walls of his small corner of the world couldn’t fall on him sooner.

The glass that crunched under your shoes became the only thing he heard until he watched as you ran back into the hallway.

In a split second, Hangman was beside him, obviously pissed.

"What the hell, man? Why aren't you with Kristie?"

"She broke it off."

Hangman clenched his jaw. He couldn't believe this was happening, but then again, Rooster had his head far up his ass more often than not. Hangman punched him in the arm, just enough for it to hurt.

"You need to leave," he said, watching as Rooster recoiled in pain.

"What?" Rooster looked at him in surprise. "No."

"Yes!" he exclaimed. Was this idiot really that much of an asshole?

This time, Phoenix spoke up, her arms crossed over her chest. "We promised you wouldn't be here. You're supposed to be up north. You're supposed to be far away from here!"

"You promised?" Rooster stared her down.

"Well, yeah, you asshole! You broke their heart. They didn't even want to come here in the first place. God, I should've just gone to see them instead of dragging them out here," Phoenix groaned, rubbing her forehead with the back of her hand.

Rooster hesitantly took a step forward.

"Rooster, get out," Hangman said, voice low.

He shook his head. He needed to talk to you.

"Rooster!"

He broke out into a run, and before Hangman could follow, Phoenix grabbed his arm.

"What the hell?" he stared at her in disbelief.

"Just let it happen," she said.

"Let what happen? Watch Y/n get their heart stepped on all over again?"

"Just… just let it happen."

Phoenix would wait for you to berate her, later. But for now, she could only wish her friends would try to make up. She could only wish that Rooster would gain a pair and grow up. Her heart ached for you as she watched Rooster run back to the bathrooms, knowing that she couldn’t ever take the pain away from you. The only one who could do that was Rooster, himself, and even then, she wasn’t sure if that would happen.

And now, he found himself standing there, the silence deafening in the small space. The light was bright in the enclosure—brighter than he remembered. His hand was still hovering, his arm growing heavy as he debated on knocking.

Should he just leave? Should he do as Hangman said and walk out? But he couldn't just leave. Not now. Not when he knew he made the biggest mistake of his life, telling you all that bullshit.

You used your sleeves to wipe your tears away as you shakily got to your feet. Your fingers struggled to even unlock the stall door, but when you did, you swung it open. Rooster had to back up just to avoid being hit with the metal.

The two of you just stood there, bright light casting shadows onto the old tile floor. Not a word was said as Rooster stared at you.

You were exactly as he remembered, if not better. You had changed your hair since the last time he saw you. He kept the mustache, and his hair was still cut the same. You kept the same style and the same makeup (or lack thereof).

You still looked at him the same… even if it quickly changed into one of anger.

You were still so beautiful.

His voice caught in his throat. He wanted to talk to you, but he couldn’t think of anything to say to you. Nothing he could say would make things better.

He was such an idiot.

You stepped forward, walking to the stark white sink. You grabbed a few paper towels and wet them before carefully wiping the remnants of your tears. You stared at your reflection in the rounded mirror, your lip caught between your teeth as you hiccuped.

"Y/n?" Rooster tentatively began. He raised a hand to touch your shoulder.

You immediately moved away from his touch, glaring in his direction.

His fist clenched beside him as he watched you.

You tossed the paper towels in the trash and pushed past him, quickly leaving the bathroom.

"Y/n," he repeated.

As you walked, he followed.

Your friends stood in their respective corner, knowing they should intervene. Yet they stayed, hoping that somehow, Rooster would fix his fuck up. They couldn’t keep watching the two of you fight some imaginary battle—they couldn’t watch the two of you wish your life away for something that was quite literally at the tips of your fingers.

Phoenix wasn't too sure if he'd be able to fix this. Hangman honestly wanted to hang a man.

You shoved the doors open, walking into the cool California night. It wasn’t like the cold in Virginia. Virginia’s winters were unforgiving—the snow that would fall would chill you to your very core. Virginia winters would put southern California to shame in an instant. At this very moment, you wished you were there, standing in the chilling wind, begging for some kind of relief—at least then, your body would become numb even if your mind was still running a mile a minute.

Nothing could have prepared you for what had transpired. Nothing could have prepared you for seeing the man you fought so hard to forget.

With no car, you continued walking. You'd call a taxi at some point. Right now, you just needed to breathe.

But you had yet to realize Rooster was still following you.

The man grabbed ahold of your wrist, making you stop in the middle of the damn parking lot. Cars and trucks alike littered the parking spots. A few people walked past you as they went into the bar, ignoring the tension that stood in the middle of it all.

You whipped around, jerking your arm away from him with wide eyes. "What's your fucking problem?!"

Rooster paused, body going rigid as he waited for you to continue.

You had never yelled at him, even when he asked for a divorce.

"Why the fuck are you even here? You're not supposed to be here! You have a fucking girlfriend. Get away from me. I don't ever want to see you again."

Tears sprung to your eyes once more. You tilted your head back, wishing they would just stop. The stars stared down at you, mocking you where you stood. The sky was so close, and yet so far away.

God, would this man ever make you stop crying?

"Y/n—"

"—just go away! I don't want you here!"

"Please," he began, "I need to talk to you. I need to apologize."

"Apologize?! Oh, that's rich! Just leave me alone. You did enough damage when you asked for a divorce. Just leave me alone."

"Y/n, please," he continued. "You… please just hear me out."

"I heard you out once, and it was the worst fucking time of my life," you said. "I'm not listening to you ever again."

You turned back around, set on leaving—this time a bit faster. But his words grounded you in your spot, heart leaping to your throat once more.

"It was a mistake!"

You stared at the gravel that crunched underneath your feet. You could feel your pulse rushing through your body, fast and unsteady.

Nothing could have prepared you for that.

"It was a mistake, Y/n," he said, his voice far quieter this time. "I never should have asked for a divorce. I never should have said anything. I should—I should have just—"

"—what, toughed it out? Let me realize you stopped loving me when you started cheating on me or some shit?"

His eyes widened in surprise.

"What? No. No, Y/n… I… I never should have said anything. I never stopped loving you."

What?

You couldn't breathe—your lungs constricted in your chest, your heart beating rapidly against your ribcage. Your body burned as you looked up at the night sky, stars littering the vast ocean of darkness. They still mocked you, but this time, dark clouds rolled in. Perhaps the sky knew just how you felt. The moon cast a soft glow on everything in its path.

Tears blurred your vision once more.

He never stopped loving you.

You let out a sob, turning to face him.

"What?"

"I never stopped loving you," Rooster lamented. "I… still love you."

"Then… then… why?"

"I couldn't do it to you."

"What? Do what?"

"I couldn't die! I couldn't die and leave you a widow. I couldn't end up with the same fate my dad had, leaving you just the same as my mom," he said.

"Well you're not fucking dead, are you?!"

Rooster paused, lips parting to speak.

"You're not dead. You're standing right in front of me, telling me that the reason you fucking divorced me was because you didn't want me to be a widow?! I would have been less upset if you had fucking died!" You took in a deep breath, pointing an accusatory finger at him. “You did not have to do that. You did not have to make me miserable. You did not have to make me feel like the one person who loved me was an entire lie!”

Rooster winced. Your words pierced his soul like a sharp bullet, ricocheting off the crevices of his very soul.

"Fuck off, Bradley Bradshaw," you said, fists clenched at your sides. "I never want to see you again."

"But Y/n—"

"—no! No, I'm over you, you bastard! I don't love you anymore. I haven't in years. You're still in love with me? That's great. Fucking deal with it. You deserve to feel the pain of not knowing. You deserve to lose yourself in everything you thought was yours.”

Bradley Bradshaw had never felt as if he wasn't good enough. When he was faced with adversity, he worked harder. When he felt bad about something, he did more to try and overcome that. He had never felt as if anything he did wasn't good enough. But in this very moment, he stood there, wondering how in the world he could have fucked up so badly.

He wasn't good enough. He wasn't good enough, for you. That much was evident as he watched you once again walk away from him, disappearing into the night.

His eyes fluttered shut and he held back his tears as he stood there, waiting for lightning to strike him where he stood. Surely, it'd be better than having to go back into the Hard Deck after a screaming match like that.

He deserved it.

A hand on his shoulder made him flinch. He opened his eyes, head darting in the person's direction. Hangman watched him for a moment before he patted his back.

"You fucked up, man," he began, averting his gaze. "Now you've gotta fix it."

"But how?"

"For fucks sake, Rooster," he groaned. He ran a hand through his perfect hair, musing it from the stress of his friend. He couldn't believe he'd ever thought Rooster might actually be a pretty smart guy. This dude was dumber than a box of rocks, and this just proved it.

"They still love you, you know," Bob said, arms crossed over his chest. "We heard what they said, but they're just hurt. You really did a number on them."

He glanced over his shoulder. The Dagger Squad stood there, all watching him as he stood there, in the middle of the parking lot.

This… was all his fault.

Those four simple words should have never left his mouth. He should have been spending the last three years with you, not trying to forget you. Because if he were to have died in that time, it would have at least been with you and not with the overwhelming ghost of you haunting his every waking move. He could have at least left you behind knowing you were loved instead of wondering if he ever truly loved you at all.

Time passed slowly in the month it took you to finally calm down from the emotional rollercoaster Rooster had you on. You were back in your apartment, the east coast calling your name (even though the west coast screamed for your return; the sandy beaches and the salty water just weren’t the same, here).

Your heart ached—every romantic thing you saw made you want to cry. It all reminded you of your ex-husband, and now, there was no changing things. In your anger, you had told him you never wanted to see him again—that you didn't love him. You made sure he knew that when you left him standing in the middle of that damned parking lot.

What a lie that was.

But if he could tell lies, why couldn't you? Why couldn't you force him to live with the idea that you didn't love him, just the way he did that to you?

Regret became you.

You wondered if that’s how he felt all this time—regretful.

Did Rooster even have a bone in his body that was capable of feeling anything other than pride?

Maverick would know.

Did he know about all of this? He had been Rooster’s best man at the wedding. Surely, he knew something.

Your arm rested over your eyes, blocking out the sunlight that peaked through your curtains. Saturday mornings never got easier for you. Hell, no morning did. Getting up was a constant chore. You had already gotten ready for the morning, but you slipped right back into bed, not wanting to deal with the idea of being a live, somewhat functioning adult at the moment.

Your phone began to ring, loud and in your ear as you lay in bed, staring at the back of your arm. With a groan, you rolled over and picked it up.

Phoenix was calling you.

You answered after a moment of your fingers hovering over the bright buttons. You didn’t really want to talk to anyone.

"Hello?"

"Y/n? Hey! So, uh, quick thing, and I promise you I didn't know about it until Bagman just said something, but he gave Rooster your address."

Silence enveloped your bedroom as you processed what she had just said.

"What?!" You immediately sat up in your bed, gripping your phone with unforgiving strength. "What the hell!"

"I know," she continued, voice laced with worry—she didn’t know how you were going to take this. "I know, and I'm sorry. But, uh, he said that Rooster is probably gonna show up within the next hour or so. He caught the earliest flight out there."

"Why?"

"Why?" Natasha echoed. "Y/n, why do you think?"

You fell silent. You stared down at the blankets that pooled at your feet.

Day after day, you wondered if Rooster would show up, begging you to take him back. But the sun continued to set, day in and day out, and nothing changed. Nothing ever changed.

"Y/n, I know he's an asshole,” Natasha said. “I know he broke your heart. But… Rooster's been through a lot. He might not have realized how bad of an idea it was until he went through with it. He’s… he’s done nothing but regret it ever since.”

"I know he's been through a lot," you said, voice far quieter than it had been. "I know he has. But… but that's no excuse. We were married. I was his partner. He took that away… he took that all away.”

"There's no excuse for him," Phoenix said. "I’m not making one. You’re… you’re my very best friend. But if he shows up and you don't know what to do, you have two options. Turn him away, or… hear him out. Whatever you do, I’m here one hundred percent of the way.”

You swallowed thickly. Without saying anything else, you hung up the phone, tossing it onto your bed. You buried your face in your hands—it seemed to be the only thing you could do recently that would actually allow you to catch your breath.

And then, your doorbell rang.

That was far less than an hour.

The shrill ding of the bell resounded in your brain. You would have to get that changed to something less annoying.

Getting out of your bed and walking down the hallway was the easy part. It was opening the front door that made you want to die as your hand slowly grabbed onto the knob.

You can just turn him away. It'll be okay, you told yourself. He will leave if you want him to.

With much hesitation, you opened the door.

Rooster stood there, worried he had gotten the wrong door and Hangman had given him some shit directions. But as you appeared in the doorway, relief spread across his features. He was dressed in those same shoes you had given him. He wore a pair of jeans, and he wore one of those stupid Hawaiian shirts that he loved so much.

You still had the pink and yellow one you had stolen before you left him in the top left drawer of your dresser. It still smelled like Rooster… but the laundry detergent you had was the same exact one you had used when you were married to him.

Everything you owned reminded you of him.

"Y/n?"

"Bradley."

His eyebrows furrowed as he watched you. He nervously wrung his hands together as his eyes looked anywhere but you. This wasn’t that confident, macho man you knew. This wasn’t Rooster.

This was Bradley Bradshaw, in the flesh.

His heart was on the line, and he could only hope that the universe would grant him one last wish—let you believe him. Let you understand him.

He would understand if you turned him away. He would leave, and he would never bother you again. But he hoped that you’d accept him for who he is—for everything he has been.

Again.

Even though it took him so long to realize his mistake. Even though he made so many mistakes just to find himself trying to take it all back.

Rooster never thought he was perfect, but hell. The universe really didn’t give him the benefit of the doubt, did it?

"Listen, I know you said you didn't want to see me," he began. "But I can't… I can't keep doing this."

You stayed silent.

Bradley was a lot of things. Stupid, funny, a great, flaming ball of firey anxiety. And still, the love of your life, even now.

Nothing would ever stop that from happening, even if he shoved his hand in your chest, pulled out your heart, and crushed it right in front of you.

Even now, after all this time, you knew you loved him.

He took your silence as an invitation to continue.

"I love you," he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I never stopped. I just… fucked up. God, Y/n, I fucked up so bad. I never should have asked you for a divorce. I never should have said any of that shit. I thought I was protecting you. But the only thing I ended up doing was hurting you more, and I never wanted that to happen.

"I love you, so much, Y/n. I never stopped. I… you are the love of my life. But… but even if I loved you, it wouldn't stop life from standing in the way. My dad died. He left my mom all alone. I couldn't do that to you. I couldn't bear the thought of you suffering, all alone, wondering what the hell you could have done to make things different. I couldn't let you have the same fate as my mom."

You stared at him, hands gripping the door.

"Why didn't you just talk to me?"

"I… I know I should have."

"So why didn't you?"

"I had already made up my mind…"

And once Bradley Bradshaw made up his mind, that was that. Most of the time, anyway.

Silence enveloped the two of you once more. Birds chirped in the background, cars honking in the backed-up traffic on the interstate not too far from your home. Life was still going on, just like it always would. Life would continue to find a way, even if someone left it behind—even if someone felt as if their world was crashing to an end.

Three years ago, if Bradley Bradshaw had shown up at your door, telling you he had made a mistake, you would have believed him. But watching him as he stood at your door this very moment, you weren't sure. You had every right to slam the door in his face, burning the image of his scared self in the back of your mind. But as you stood here, hands dangling down by your thighs, you knew you couldn't.

Were you stupid for what you were about to do?

Maybe.

But so was Bradley.

"I've started seeing a therapist," Bradley spoke, breaking the silence. "He said it would be good for me to at least… try to tell you why."

"Why you left me?"

He gave a small nod. "Yes. And… he made me realize it never should have happened. It was my fault. It was never yours."

You rubbed your eyes out of frustration, unable to stop yourself from sniffling. A groan escaped you, and he frowned in response.

"Y/n, I… words can't even begin to describe how sorry I am. I can't take back what I said. I can't change the fact that I asked you for a divorce because I was terrified of dying and leaving you alone. But… but I can do this," he said, licking his lips as he watched you.

You tilted your head in confusion, not sure where he was going with this.

Time moved slowly—just as slowly as it had when your world came to a startling halt.

He suddenly held out his hand, locking eyes with you once more. Dark brown eyes peered into yours; those same brown eyes you used to watch until you fell asleep in his arms. Those same brown eyes you stared into when you first said, “I do.” Those same brown eyes you looked into when he asked you for a divorce.

"Hi," the man said, a small smile appearing on his mustache-clad lips. "I'm Bradley. Bradley Bradshaw."

Your eyes widened, your heart leaping to your chest once more, but not because you were scared to face him. But because you couldn't believe this was really happening.

He… was starting over.

You were starting over.

Hesitantly, you took his hand, firmly grasping it before you shook it.

"It's so nice to meet you, Bradley Bradshaw," you said. Your eyes were still red from your tears, but you began to smile, pushing down the pain and regret of the last three years. It wasn’t worth it. The utter buffoon standing in front of you was worth it. "I'm Y/n Bradshaw," you continued with a grin. "Quite a coincidence, huh?"

Bradley just smiled, tilting his head to the side. You had never changed your name. In fact, you stayed the same, despite the icy shield around your heart. Not that he could blame you.

You were his Y/n. The love of his life—the reason he continued on, and the reason he believed in love, despite the fear that sucked the rational thinking out of him.

Because even when death knocked at his door, he knew you would be there. You would be there, just like his mom was for his dad.

Nothing could change that.

Not the divorce, not his lie that lasted for years. Not the untimely “confession” that left the two of you reeling for each other.

Nothing could change how he felt for you.

And with one instant, you knew your world was mending itself. You'd have problems—that you were sure. You’d have to work on communication; on both sides. But as you moved out of the way for Rooster to come in, you knew it would be worth it.

Love, no matter how much it hurt, was worth it.

Good enough or not.

"Why don't you come in, Mr. Bradshaw? I think we have a lot to catch up on."

He leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, taking ahold of your hand.

"Only if you'll have me."

"Of course, I will."

This was a start. A new start.

A good start.

You were both starting over. And although you wouldn’t ever say it out loud, a part of you was starting to realize that you may have always been good enough—sometimes, fear was stronger than anyone’s resolve. Fear could make even the bravest people pause; it could cause stupid decisions and brash opinions that change everything a person knows. Minds were a powerful tool that could hurt everyone in its path.

You lived it.

You were still living it.

But like any great thing, sometimes starting over is the best way to go. Sometimes, opening your heart back up is the only thing you can do to move on.

Those same brown eyes you fell in love with peered down at yours, and for once in the past three years, you finally felt at peace. You were good enough. You always had been.

And Bradley Bradshaw was a good man. A great man, even. But even great men can fall short. Even great men can make mistakes. It takes an even greater person to face those mistakes head-on, and an equally great person to forgive and continue on loving, even if they never stopped, to begin with.

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dead-lausen-journeys · 20 days

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Hi I like to request for yandere speedwagon please and thank you ❤❤

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Thanks for my first request! Due to nothing being specified I will write general head cannons for Yan Phantom Blood Speedwagon! Automatically gender neutral as well. I mean it's kinda one-shotish? Also, fun fact, I'm literally haunted by Speedwagon srs.

Warnings!!: Murder is mentioned, mentions of self sacrifice/starving oneself. As well as minor mentions of coercion.

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Yandere Speedwagon Head cannons;

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We should start where it began, right? It's most likely that you were also some orphaned kid kicked out on the curb of Ogre street. Another poor soul similar to himself, possibly getting wrapped up in the same street gang he had also joined. Or maybe working freelance for any sort of income, but with how horrendous children are treated out there it's most likely not even worth trying. That's exactly why Speedwagon had even started to rely on criminal means to get by.

No matter how the two of you meet, either with normal or criminal means. It's a good thing to have people to rely on, and that's exactly what you were to the young man. Someone he could rely on when all else failed.

During the start of your formative years with the young blond boy, Speedwagon had a nack for getting himself into potentially life threatening situations. Either mugging the wrong gentleman on the streets, or getting caught stealing. Whatever it may be, you would either be right there to get him out of the fray, even heal and tend to his easily avoidable wounds... It makes a certain kind of trust to form between you two. Even if he's not entirely trustful of you at first, but as soon as you'd show him that you genuinely care, unlike those gangsters within Ogre street, he loosens up quickly. Much like how he saw Johnathans gold heart, he saw yours.

And as the two of you aged, growing up together like the family neither of you had, he'd soon grow more and more protective of you. Speedwagon values the genuinely good hearted people, it's an ideology you can't remove from him even with his sprees of theft and even murder. Being constantly exposed to such disturbing and horrifying things does something to people. He doesn't want to see the same thing happen with you. Not you, so, soon enough he asks you to stay behind. Not exactly restricting if you could go out or not. He knows you're capable, he's only paranoid that he would either find you dead or in an even worse state.

Especially when the two of you enter into adulthood, Speedwagon's paranoia about your safety reaches its absolute peak. Which would push his mental state further. Requesting that you just stay inside. Stay in the abandoned building the two of you called home until he gets back. He couldn't bear to see you hurt, especially when he could so easily prevent it.

To also say that over your years spent together in hell on earth made him catch some feelings for you, ones that aren't all that platonic. You've been his backbone since childhood, it was only natural that those feelings had realized themselves into this feeling of devotion. Especially with how brutal it is to live in such a place where food is considered a luxury. And Robert is a rather lucid man, he knows that a place like Ogre street isn't somewhere to fall in love- per say. Yet— he can't help this giddy feeling the blond gets around you even if he'd t.

You're a small dash of color in a land full of blacks and grey's. It only makes his heart swoon in joy once he's able to return to the place the two of you call home. Sometimes the man fantasizes about the both of you being married when this happens. That he's just your loving husband returning home, yet he knows that's not a reality. Yet, at least.

Over time he'd have a habit of trying to show off. Either from his bizarre fighting style to his almost frightening awareness and ability to narrate his surroundings to a T. Robert finds joy in this, seeing the way you either comment on his ability or subtly laugh at his goofy nature. It makes his days just a little bit brighter. It only fed this growing feeling in his heart that the two of you were meant to be.

But don't be fooled by his silliness, he can be quite serious when need be. As Robert himself has killed before, and will not hesitate to do so again when there's no other option left. It's most likely that he has killed someone for you're sake- either it be a dedicated creep or some London lowlife, he does feel guilty, but he'd rather protect those he loves rather than people he doesn't even know...

His street personality is strikingly different from his almost golden retriever-like attitude he carries around you at all times. Isn't he just the cutest, most charming man you've seen? Even if his antics are perceived as rather rude or extrinsic, Robert doesn't care. He'd light himself on fire to have those eyes on him for even a second longer...

These feelings he holds for you are rather charming. It runs deep within, more so than anyone could expect. As the eccentric man couldn't see himself where he is right now without you. You've played such a big role in why he's still breathing that he genuinely believes that he couldn't have survived up until now without your guidance and hospitality. His heart yearns to spew out his woes, to embrace you and never let go. He'd be the happiest man on earth if you even grazed his calloused and dirtied hands even accidentally. Practically making his stress melt away in record time and with flawless efficiency. There's nothing you could do now that would change Robert's view of you, he's practically like a trailing puppy at this point. Wherever you go, good ol' Robert E.O Speedwagon is not far behind!

He would give up anything to keep you well and happy, especially during those cold winters where he'd lend you anything warm he had- even if the two of you had the luxury of a fireplace in this old and rotten home. Robert would happily freeze, bleed and even starve if it meant that you were safe and sound.

The man is dedicated enough to bring around with him over a dozen momento's of you. From a torn and dirty piece of fabric that once belonged to your old clothes, maybe some locks of hair— if he's lucky enough he'd find some sort of locket to store these items of love— kissing it for good luck whenever he has the chance too. Robert is a hopeless romantic, after all. Keeping such things with him reminds him of why he's still fighting, to get back to you each time.

Oh, and about his prior fantasies of getting married— Robert would be overjoyed if you were to accept his proposal, even if it did take a bit of coercion. Robert is still over the moon with joy. With or without a ring, it doesn't matter to him. Especially after the events of Phantom Blood, Robert is just relieved that he's able to live the rest of his life with you without the threat of the supernatural or vampires... Or anyone else to disturb the two of you anymore...

#yandere jjba #yandere jojos bizarre adventure #yandere phantom blood #yandere jjba part 1 #yandere x reader #yandere reo speedwagon #Tw. coercion #Tw. mentions of murder #pure post #yandere speedwagon #yandere headcannons

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callsign-rogueone · 1 month

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1-6, 8, and 15-18 for Garrick and Angel?

2-6 and 14-18 for Duchess and Brennan?

Don’t feel pressured to do them all! Just whichever ones of those won’t spoil any of the future posts 💕💕

hi! here’s the ones for Garrick and Angel + a few that another person asked for. I’ll put Bren and Duchess in a separate post 🥰

🏷: 1.2k words (I got a little carried away lol), contains iron flame spoilers and spoilers for their chapters that I’ve already posted.

1. What made them attracted to each other at first?

I think it’s a pretty common experience to look at a childhood friend one day and just go.. whoa. that’s kinda what happened here. I think she realized how strong he is (watching him spar with Xaden? him teaching her to fight?), and he realized how beautiful she is. after a few years of that mutual starry-eyed attraction, and Xaden running interference for both sides, we got our favorite couple.

2. What do they find attractive in each other now?

physical: she’s really into how broad and tall he is, and his physical presence (when he uses that section-leader voice? whew.). and of course, that damn smile of his. he likes how soft and warm she is; her smile, the feel of her skin and her hair, the plush of her body… after she left basgiath and wasn’t constantly working out all the time anymore, she got a little softer around the edges, and he loved it.

emotional: his humor, his kindness and how understanding and patient he is with her; her heart, her gentleness and deep empathy, how amazing she is with kids, animals, and even plants.

3. What would they never want to change about the other one? and 4. What do they wish they could change about the other one?

combining these two. I don’t think either of them would want to change much at all. they fell in love with each other because of who they are, not despite it. but if you really want a straight answer… he might wish that she took better care of herself (not working herself to burnout all the time). she might wish he would stop taking so many risks and freaking her out all the time (when he came back from Samara with that giant scar, she about lost it.)

5. What’s something that could make them break up?

neither of them are letting go of the other any time soon, for any reason, but if you want to get really technical, then like. someone cheating, or him doing something she can’t forgive / a severe violation of her ethics (killing someone in cold blood, etc), but neither of those are going to happen ever, so we’re good.

6. What’s keeping them together?

simply put, they need each other. a lot of their relationship from age 16-17 until now (and for the foreseeable future with this whole venin thing still unresolved) is founded on them helping each other cope with life and all the crazy shit that happens to them. things will look up soon (I hope), but they’re good at finding the little happy moments and savoring them, and they do genuinely love each other.

as @fw-gt once said; “she nurtures and he protects”. he’s doing everything he can to keep her safe (see what I did there?) and she’s that soft, comforting presence and a reminder that there is still good in the world.

8. Do their families like each other?

yes absolutely they did. their fathers both worked closely with Xaden’s, which is how they met as literal babies lol. I like to think that while the two of them weren’t bf/gf yet during the revolution, their parents both shipped it and knew it would happen eventually. her dad 100% would have given Garrick his blessing to marry her. (maybe he did, before he died. maybe her parents’ wedding rings are hidden in his room at Riorson house. that would be wild…)

10. How does being separated make them feel?

we got into this a little bit when they were apart from july-october in Iron Flame. that was really the longest they’d ever been apart, since they were childhood friends and then were fostered together (along with sweetheart! Gare likes to joke that she’s their ‘practice child’.)

getting off the trail and into the weeds here, sorry. but yeah. life just kinda loses its color when they’re apart for more than a day or two, and they both start worrying about the other’s safety, and he worries about her taking care of herself while he’s gone. before he left Riorson house to return to basgiath, leaving her behind, he made sure that she’d be taken care of (bren and duchess and tab were on the case) and he had to call in a few favors to send her those letters.

11. How long can they go without seeing each other before starting to miss the other one?

kinda answered this above, oops, but a few days is the tipping point. angel gets even more withdrawn and tries to busy herself with work or helping others to take her mind off of her anxiety about him being gone, and he gets kinda grumpy and stressed -- not like Xaden-level grumpy, but close. she’s the one who melts that stress away, so it builds up without her. him and X definitely did a lot of sparring when they were away from their girls to help get rid of that pent-up emotion.

15. Is one of them way more invested in the relationship than the other?

no. they’re equally invested, equally in love.

16. How happy are they about their relationship?

oh, over the moon. they’re endgame, going to get married and have kids, zero doubt. I have their kids’ names picked out and everything (keeping that under wraps for now, because I don’t know what I’m gonna do with that yet…)

they’re met with a little eye rolling and joking from their friends sometimes about just how in love they are, but they know it’s all in good fun, and that they must be doing it right if they’re making people jealous lol

17. How good are they at communicating their needs and preferences to the other?

I’d say that this is one of their weak spots as a couple. we’ve established that Angel isn’t great at taking care of or prioritizing herself, largely because she doesn’t believe she deserves it / values others needs more than hers. at this point, Garrick knows her super well and usually knows what she’s too afraid to ask for and does it anyway, but there’s also often a little secret relay that goes on there (Tab to Chradh or the other way around) when things really need to be addressed but someone is being too stubborn to spit it out.

18. How good are they at respecting each other’s boundaries?

ooh, boy, another fun one. Garrick respects her refusal to harm others unless absolutely necessary, and it’s one of the things he loves about her, but it can also strain things at times; they’re going to a war college, where everyone is armed and dangerous and a lot of people don’t like the Tyrs. this also threw a major wrench into him training her to fight, which I’m currently writing about for another of their chapters. but otherwise, when a boundary is drawn, it’s kept in place and not crossed unless deemed necessary. both of them are act-now, apologize-later people when it comes to matters of their partner’s safety and health, especially Garrick re: angel overworking herself. he’s not afraid to pick her up and physically remove her from a situation lmao

my og couple <33333 I need to sit down and plan out the rest of their story this week. I’ve been neglecting them :( ⚔️🌿🥰

#liz.txt #answered #Garrick and Angel #Garrick Tavis x reader #technically #fourth wing x reader

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anxiousnerdwritings · 2 years

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YanDad!Daemon Targaryen vs YanMama!Rhea Royce?

The custody battle that everyone thought they never wanted but needed it.

They baby daughter who was a result of a reluctant consummation of their wedding night- the child they thought they’d never wanted until they’d finally met them in the flesh after birth. She Targaryen and Royce altogether which I don’t doubt Daemon will smugly say his bby is all Targaryen which will lead to Rhea giving him a snarky comeback in return that they’re definitely a full-on Royce while clinging into their confused bby.

And the best part- Daemon gives her the biggest dragon egg he ever finds from the dragon pit. Then boom! Three dragons comes out of that egg which makes everyone shooketh. 😌

I imagine their child being the result of the one and only time they ever consummated their marriage and Daemon was probably drunk off his ass at the time too. Even if Rhea didn’t like Daemon, she was dutiful in her part of the marriage and that was to give him a child and that’s what she did. It wouldn’t be a surprise of Daemon wanted nothing to do with the child, he did his part in lending his seed, what more was there for him out of this arrangement.

You are right though, it wouldn’t be until their child is born that both of them have a change of heart. They still don’t care for each other and have no need for either to be in their company but having their precious child in the picture would only cause for Daemon and Rhea to be more estranged. Viserys or even Alysanne when she was still alive probably forced Daemon to be there when Rhea was giving birth. Daemon was most likely annoyed and would have rather been literally anywhere other then there but the moment he does set his eyes on his child, he utterly adores them. It’s also probably due to Alysanne that their child has an egg to begin with, she most definitely handed him an egg she picked out herself before sending him off to the Vale.

I imagine their child looking mostly Targaryen except for maybe their eyes, them having Rhea’s eyes or something. This would definitely give Daemon the impression that his child is all Targaryen and no Royce, only for Rhea to bite back that they have her eyes and that when they get older they’ll see him for who or what he really is because of it.

Daemon would want to leave with his child as soon as possible and show them off to everyone and celebrate. Not to mention get away from his wife. He would really not want to leave his bby with Rhea knowing damn well she’ll shit talk him to their child. He’d rather be a single father and raise his child to his standards then leaving them to be raised by Rhea. And no them co-parenting together is not even a thought nor would it be a good one.

It wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to say that once Daemon sees and holds his child for the first time that’s when he decides for sure that Rhea needs to go. Doesn’t help that she probably made a comment about their child being the only good things he’s ever done or something that would rub him the wrong way.

Given when Daemon and Rhea get married it wouldn’t be a surprise if their child and Rhaenyra were childhood friends, Daemon would especially ensure that it happens, whether Rhea allows him to leave with their child and take them to King’s Landing or not. And we all know Daemon would totally take their child without Rhea’s knowledge or permission.

As their child grows up I think Daemon and Rhea will come to the unwanted realization that their child is the dangerous mix of both of them. And neither particularly likes that the other is so prominently ingrained in their child’s development. But that doesn’t make them care for their child any less, if anything it makes both of them want to further bring out their own behaviorism and tendencies out of their child.

In regards to their child’s dragon egg, I think it would be even better if instead of three dragons hatching from the same egg, it is instead a three headed dragon. It would be even cooler if the three heads breathed a different color of dragonflame.

#anxious answers #yandere daemon targaryen #yandere rhea royce #yandere house of the dragon #yandere house of the dragon concept #yandere game of thrones #yandere game of thrones concept #yandere concept

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adagaium · 1 year

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let’s talk about ardyn and aera !

as in, my god let’s talk about how much ardyn loves aera, and how that is one of his greatest motivators and also one of his greatest weaknesses, not because love is a weakness, but because ardyn has another goal ( his revenge on somnus, which is redirected very poorly onto EVERYONE AROUND HIM ), and he will hesitate. and he has hesitated, because sometimes he would realize “damn aera wouldn’t want me to do this” because under all the daemons, ardyn himself still exists.

ardyn and aera met when they were children, and at first, they hated each other. mostly because they were slapped in an arranged marriage AS CHILDREN, because aera had been chosen from her family by the gods to serve as oracle and ardyn was literally an astral himself, despite growing up like a human would ( a complicated situation for another post ). so of course, they decided to avoid each other and live their own separate lives, because they wanted to have CHOICE. because they wanted to grow into the people they were meant to be, so that maybe they COULD end up liking each other. neither wanted to be in a loveless union.

and they did the right thing, because when they reunited after years of just vague letters sent by messengers, they had the maturity to sit and talk and learn about each other. and they found out that they really did click. and then they ended up falling in love genuinely very, very fast. it was in both their natures to deeply love, and so they were incredibly loyal once they figured out things were going to work out, and since they Actually got along, it felt less like they’d been stripped of choice in the past, and more that they were Actually Consenting to being married ( which didn’t happen, but that’s a different story ).

in any good relationship, forging a strong bond is incredibly important. ardyn and aera also communicated with each other on a regular basis regardless of whether or not ardyn was traveling. and at first, aera traveled with him, because she could be the oracle Wherever she was; being confined was not a requirement, nor was it necessarily helpful. in an age where things were different and the gods were in touch a lot more frequently, all aera needed to do was find a place and bless a small area of it and sit and then she’d talk to the gods. no temples required, and quite frankly no crystal required.

fast forward, ardyn and aera end up having two sons. precious boys who inherited their father’s healing gift ( and divine blood ) and their mother’s ability to at the very least understand the gods. and things were okay, until aera was Forcibly Removed And Trapped In The Castle where she literally had to sneak out to see ardyn. the boys also were taken with their mother, which left ardyn alone ( which was BAD!!! so much of this could’ve been avoided!!! ). but, the proof of the strength of ardyn’s love for aera ( and his sons ) was that it didn’t lessen at all despite the distance between them. he never considered trying to find someone else and he was certain she wasn’t going to try to fill any void either, because to them, there was no void. they were two souls that essentially functioned as one.

now, some fun facts about memories: there is a capacity. people don’t remember everything, and that’s normal. sure, ardyn is also the astral of the dawn, mithra, which means he’s Not Human from the get-go, but he Functioned as one for a good 33 years. humans forget.

for 2000 years, ardyn remembered everything about aera. actually, he remembered her for the rest of his existence. he’d be able to spot her anywhere ( and for as confusing as it was to look at luna who did share some similarities, luna is very much Not Aera and that is also a post in itself, some of which i previously addressed, but there’s always more ).

fun fact! ardyn didn’t remember what somnus looked like. he just knew that somnus didn’t look like the armored being that there are so many statues of. he made a wild guess that somnus looked like noctis, and even then, previously he assumed somnus shared traits with regis. as in, ardyn slapped the face of the current king of lucis onto his brother, because he didn’t remember, and that did cause him a lot of distress.

he also had forgotten his son’s faces, but still remembered their voices and their mannerisms, and that’s also very sad, because those are his SONS!!! but he never forgot anything about aera.

that made her the perfect image for bahamut to use to torture ardyn into submitting to his so-called fate. because ardyn couldn’t find any flaws in bahamut’s illusion of aera, so he could only rationalize it as “bahamut revived her just so she could hurt me and cut off the last tie to any morals that i have”, and in a way it did work, but not in the way bahamut thought. because ardyn still was so certain that aera would never do that to him. that even if she had known the truth of things, sure, he was upset that maybe she hadn’t told him things, but he also knew that if anything, she would’ve kept quiet because she wanted him to forge his own path. because he trusts her and he believed for literally all of his existence that she had his best interest at heart, and that there was nothing fake about her love.

the tldr of this is despite everything that happened, ardyn continued to love aera with all of his being, and i am very, very emotional about them

#and when god asks me about love‚ i always respond with cruelty ❜ › meta analysis

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transboysokka · 7 months

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ok so for your roomie troubles, i really think you're in the right. did yall ever make an agreement, formal or informal, that you'd stay/pay the full two years of a lease you're not on? if no, then you're literally doing nothing wrong. maybe there was a bit of a communications breakdown that neither of you realized was happening until you were moving out, but that doesn't change the fact that the breakdown seems to have started because your roomie made an assumption and didn't ask to confirm. that's on them. you told them you plan and had no reason to expect that they thought you'd changed your mind. at least that's what it sounds like. second, you're still offering to pay an extra month. that's well beyond your social commitments imo. were you strangers, I'd say drop her and let her deal, but you are at least somewhat friends, so i get the desire to help her out. but you're still helping her out here. you do not live there anymore, even after she learned you were moving, she had time to find a new roomie. with the buffer of an extra month's pay, she has even more time. hell, if she's really struggling, i can understand her asking for another month's rent portion just between friends, cuz mistakes happen and getting a roomie can be hard. but she's calling into wuestion your integrity for not continuously paying rent for a place you dont live in?? no. you did not sign the lease. you did not have an agreement that you pay for 2 years. you gave her ample warning. even with less warning, you are giving her a grace period. and in the end, YOU DO NOT LIVE THERE. she can think whatever she wants, but your integrity is not at risk for refusing to pay the rent /continuously/ for a place you do not live.

frankly i dont even care that she's married. i dont know her or her spouse's financial situation, so if she needs a roomie to pay half the rent, then whatever. regardless, she had warning. she HAS warning. she has time to find someone to move in. it sounds like she's panicked and getting defensive because she doesn't know what to do. what she should be doing is asking for help instead of throwing accusations and defamatory statements. you would not be a bad person for refusing to pay beyond that extra month, regardless of what she says. if you're worried or feel guilty, i might recommend offering to help find her a roomie, or other means of paying the rent that don't rely on you, but definitely be cautious with that route. it sounds like she's the type to try to haul responsibility off where she can, and it shouldn't be your job to fix her negligence. and even if my read on the situation is wrong, that she really is trying her hardest to get another roomie, that doesn't give her permission to blame you, or ask you to keep paying indefinitely. situation sucks, and maybe she really is trying, but if she's struggling, she should be asking you for help, not retaliating and trying to tie you to commitments that were never agreed upon

Thank you, this helps me feel a lot better. Like, I also thought I was being extra nice and generous, and the gaslighting and calling my integrity into question really had me doubting. I appreciate your thoughtful response. I’ve been trying to look at it from the standpoint of ending a lease with a landlord early. Like I gave plenty of notice, I got out, and I’m not expecting my deposit back. The extra month rent is just an extra nicety and the fact that it somehow seems expected tells me to just be finished with all this…

#quesTian #roommate drama #I deleted the original post lol but you are so right anon!

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readerstories · 3 years

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Magic Fingers - Aaron Hotchner x male!reader

I got so many other ideas for fics with Aaron and male reader, this was just an excuse to write some “shorter” smut while I work on some longer fics. (AO3)

Warnings: smut, clothed sex

Wordcount: 2978

Summary: Working hard on a case you offer to give Hotch a massage, because the man is as stiff and tense as a block of wood. (And maybe you want to get your hands on him, but that’s neither here nor there).

The case had been hard, challenging, brutal, and difficult, which had caused the whole team to work on overdrive for the last few days with very little sleep. Which was why Hotch had ordered everyone back to the hotel to get some sleep, as none of you were going to get anywhere being as sleep deprived as you were.

He had tried to stay behind himself, but you had more or less dragged him back to a car while reminding him that even he was human and needed rest. Back at the hotel, in your shared room (because of course with your luck there wasn’t any single rooms left in the hotel for anyone in the team), you stretch before sitting down on your own bed, Hotch walking over to his.

You could see how tense he was, how much he needed to relax. Which was easier said then done when Hotch took as much responsibility as he did, always making sure everything possible was done to catch the unsub and save anyone who might get in harms way. Which was an admirable trait of his, but you could tell by his posture how stiff he had gotten over the last few days. The way he held himself spoke volumes to you, even though you knew he tried to shield it from the world and keep it to himself.

“Hotch?” He looks away from his jacket, the only item of his suit he has manged to force himself out of so far, while your jacket, shoes, and tie was long gone. You pat the edge of the bed next to where you are sitting, Hotch looks skeptical.

“Come on, you need to relax.”

“What does me sitting next to you have anything to do with that?”

“Let me give you a massage.” He raises a brow and you sigh, shifting so you’re kneeling on the bed instead.

“You’ve seen my resume, you know you I thought about going into massage therapy at one point.” Still, Hotch doesn’t move, so you know you have to do more to convince him.

“Remember when Reid had slept on his neck all wrong that one time after staying up way too late and I helped? Or when Morgan messed up his shoulder when going after an unsub and couldn’t sleep for days, and after a massage he finally could? It was the closest I’ve ever seen the man to weeping. Or when JJ was pregnant and hurting, but after letting me give her a massage she joked that if she didn’t love Will, and I wasn’t gay, she would have married me? Hotch, at this point I’ve given a massage to everyone on the team but you, so, get.”

You make a grabby motion with your hands. Hotch sigh, seeming to finally get how serious and stubborn you were being in that moment. He takes off his tie and shoes on the way over to the bed, but doesn’t do anything else, which makes everything a bit harder, but hey, you’ll take anything you’ll get. As Hotch sits down you’re greeted by the lovely opportunity to stare at his back without him noticing or caring too much, which would have been great, if you couldn’t tell how tense he was without even needing a single touch.

When you touch his shoulders he almost jumps, but he forces himself to calm down. Which doesn’t do much, because the instant your hands are on him you can tell it’s going to take a while and some effort to get him relax.

You slowly, ever so slowly start to move you hand, starting out gently at first to get a feeling for him. And ho boy, those are some serious knots if you’ve ever felt some. Your thumb barely brushes over one with some pressure and Hotch winces. You take a breath in trough your teeth, Hotch truly can’t be feeling any sort of pleasant right now, or really, ever you suppose.

“Hotch, if I really didn’t know any better, I would say your shoulders are made of wood with how stiff they are and how many knots I can feel.” Hotch grunts and starts to move like he’s about to stand up, but you drag him back down so he’s fully sitting again with your hands on his shoulders.

“Oh no, none of that, you’re not moving off this bed until all of them are gone and you can you know, actually be a little relaxed for once in your adult life.” Hotch scoffs, but doesn’t try to move again, which you count as a victory.

For the next, you don’t even know how long, your hands wander, squeeze, and press all over Hotch’s shoulders, loosing muscles and knots as good as you can while kneeling behind Hotch. Hotch is mostly quiet, only letting out sighs and the occasional grunt when an especially hard spot is made pliant.

When you’ve done as much as you can in this position you withdraw your hands, noting how Hotch is slumping slightly more forward now than he was when you started.

“Up the bed please, I can’t reach more like this.” Hotch turns so he can look at you over his shoulder.

“You’ve massaged my shoulders, what mor-”

“If your shoulders are any indication, you need a full body massage, so up on the bed please, front down.” You stare down Hotch, not breaking eye contact for one second. You’ve decided that he needs that massage, even if you have to tackle him to the bed to give it to him. He seems to have sensed this as he sighs, and above all miracles, does as you asked of him. He’s on his front, arms tucked under his head to use as a pillow, you now kneeling next to one hip.

Pleased with yourself, you get to work. You start where you left off from before, somewhere in the middle of his back. The knots there aren’t as bad as his shoulders, you suppose Hotch takes ‘bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders’ literally sometimes, but still you do your best to let your hands work over them until they are smoothed out and the muscles beneath your palms relax.

Over time your hands move downwards, and at some point right above the waist of his pants and his belt, your hands on either hip, they brush a particular point or points which make Hotch draw in a breath. Your hands pause before you speak.

“Sorry, you ticklish there?”

“A little.” Hotch reluctantly admits, mostly speaking at the wall he has been staring at for the last few minutes.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You say as you file that little nugget of info away in a part of your brain you’ve dedicated to Hotch. You make sure to avoid that spot when your hands starts up again, instead moving to his lower back. There you find a knot truly worth your skilled hands, taking several minutes before you can move your hands from that spot. You realize you’ve accomplished your goal there when Hotch lets out a loud groan as you fell his muscles loosen beneath your hands, which you gather was an involuntary sound by the slight redness on his cheeks.

“See, I told you I was good.” Hotch doesn’t responds verbally, but nods, eyes closed now. You don’t say anything else, instead moving to his legs. You start at one ankle, slowly, slowly moving your way upwards, careful not to go to high for both of your comfort. You can tell when that is by a small twitch on Hotch’s leg, just above where you can feel the start of his boxers through his pants, and then you move down. You do however at on point press on a muscle on the backside of his knee that causes the leg to move on its own, which causes you both to laugh.

When both legs are done, you take your hands off Hotch and lean back, noting how his eyes are closed, almost like he’s sleeping.

“Turn around.” This causes Hotch to abruptly open his eyes and look at you for the first time since he laid down.

“What?”

“I haven’t done your front yet, and I’m not about to let you go with a half finished massage.”

“I-I’d rather not.” Looking over Hotch you quickly realize, with your profiling work and previous experience, why he’s not moving yet.

“If it’s an erection that’s nothing new.”

“Wha-”

“Your body is just reacting to stimuli, happens a lot with men, nothing I haven’t seen before. But if you really want to stop, we can of course do that.” You can see Hotch’s mind at war with himself. You say nothing, pretending that there’s a very interesting spot on the wall above the headboard.

It’s the movement of the mattress that alerts you to the fact that Hotch is moving, as the man himself says nothing. When you look at him, he has his arms over his face, jaw and mouth barely visible. What is very visible, is the erction pushing against the front of his pants, and though you would have liked to look, you only give it a glance. Hotch jumps when you touch his ankle again, but you don’t start just yet.

“Relax, like I said, nothing I haven’t seen before. Happens a lot actually, my hands are just that good you know, like a god or something.” Hotch huffs out a laugh, a smile briefly on his lips. You smile back at him even though he can’t see you, and then concentrate back on the task at hand.

Like before, you start at his ankles, working your way up. Hotch gets less tense almost by the second, breathing deepening as your hands work their magic once more. You don’t go very high on his thighs, actually now you’re lower than before, not wanting to make Hotch uncomfortable in any way.

Next is his hips, you start at the one closest to you and work your way up towards his shoulder instead of across his stomach. He still has his arms over his face, so you poke him in the bicep to get his attention.

“Arm please.” Hotch’s sigh is deep, but he moves his arm so you can take it. You’re gentle, well, as gentle as you can be while kneading out knots from tired muscles. His bicep is firm under your fingers, needing a lot less attention than his shoulders luckily.

When you’re done with that arm, you let it go, tapping on his other so he can move that of his face and switch it for the one you finished with. The angle of it is a bit awkward, and you probably should move for easier access, but honestly you can’t be bothered as you’re very close to being finished. However, your knee protests, telling your body that hey, moving is good as not to let limbs fall asleep.

But instead of doing the logical and probably better thing of getting of the bed and walking around, your tired brain decides to just move one leg over Hotch waist, intending to just move the other one over and after. Hotch draws in a slight breath at the motion and then something in your leg fails you, causing you to drop down on Hotch, putting most of your weight on top of Hotch’s crotch. Hotch moans out loud as his hands flies to your lower thighs and you go stock still.

“Fuck shit, sorry Hotch-”

“It’s fine, it’s fine, it-” Hotch draws in a deep breath and licks his lips as you worriedly watch his face. You’re mortified, you just dropped yourself on Hotch’s erection, holy fuck, shit.

It takes a few seconds to realize that you’re not trying to move of Hotch’s lap.

But Hotch isn’t trying to move you off either.

If anything, he’s keeping you there, a deathgrip on your lower thighs.

You take a few terrifying seconds to take stock of the situation before experimentally rolling your hips against Hotch. A flex of his fingers, but he does or says nothing as he stares at the ceiling. You on the other hand, is watching his face for any hint of what he’s thinking.

“If you want me to stop, I’ll stop, and we’ll forget about it ever happening.”

“Ah, um, fuck, shit.”

Silence, one, two, three beats.

“Fuck, move.” You start to get off his, heart already dropping to your guts, but instead Hotch drags you down and rolls his hips against you. This time it’s you who gasps, as your own dick twitches in your pants with the feeling of Hotch grinding against you. Hotch throws his head back, eyes screwed shut.

You’re quick to find your balance and leverage by placing your hands on Hotch’s chest, grinding down, moving as best as you can with Hotch’s own movements. Hotch is letting out a few low moans, which you match with your own as you move and watch the adam’s apple on Hotch’s throat move as he swallows. You want to lean down and kiss his neck, but fuck, you don’t know if you even can kiss him, if he will let you.

Hotch answers that question for you, as just seconds later his eyes open and he moves so he can look at you, catching you staring at him.

“Ah fuck.” Before you can even ask, he’s sitting up. You yelp as the movement causes you to straddle his thighs instead, and then in seconds there’s a hand on the nape of your neck, and even fewer seconds later you’re kissing Hotch.

Fuck.

His lips are firm, but pressing against you with a desperation you’re sure to match. His hands on your hips, holding you hard. Your hands go into his hair, tugging him even closer of that is even possible at this point, which causes him to moan low into your mouth which holy shit, that is, fuck, you can’t even think anymore you think.

The world shifts around you then, and you find yourself on your back, Hotch’s erection pressed against your own. It feels so good, so big and firm, and you want to feel more of him, but you can’t muster the brainpower to do anything about it, so you just tug at his hair and grind against him. Hotch seems of the same mind, as he doesn’t move to do much more either, just moving his hips against yours while kissing you within an inch of your life.

Which should be ridiculous, because you’re both grown men almost fully dressed still, but fuck, that makes it even hotter you think. Or, you try to think, as your mind is mostly chants of ‘more, good, fuck, shit, hot’ over and over again, Hotch’s name thrown in the mix for good measure.

Hotch moves away from your lips, but doesn’t move far, instead peppering kissed down your neck on the little skin he can reach. You moan and gasp, moving one hand from his hair to his back, trying to press him even more against you.

“Fuck, shit, I’m close, so close!” You frantically confess towards the ceiling.

“Me too, me too.” Hotch breathes against your neck, one hand moving so he can unbutton your shirt and get his lips on your collarbone. He starts to suck and bite at a spot there, and that is what does you in. You come just seconds after your shirt is open for him, moaning loudly.

“Fuck!” You hear Hotch mutter against your skin, and then a mutter of your name as he comes, in a low baritone that you think you will remember for the rest of your life.

You lay there panting for several seconds, or perhaps minutes, you’re not sure, just a mess of limbs, most of Hotch’s weight on top of you.

It’s hot, in more ways than one, which is what forces you to push Hotch off you, to get some air. He goes willingly, flopping down on his back next to you on the bed. A few panting breaths before you both turn to look at the other, smiles, then laughter as the situation sinks in. You’re surprisingly the first to gain somewhat of a control over yourself, grinning as you speak.

“We just came in our pants, what are we, teenagers?” Hotch pushes his weight up on his elbows, wincing as apparently something pulls somewhere.

“I don’t know about you, but I certainly don’t feel like one.” Hotch smiles as you, which you return, letting your eyes wander all over him now that you can. His hair is standing in a million different directions, there’s a blush to his cheeks, his clothes are rumpled, a wet spot is forming on the front of his pants, and he looks as fucked and blissed out as you, and most certainly he, feels. You hum, your attention going back to his face.

“We should get cleaned up.” You state, which Hotch nods in response.

“I think you mean you should get us cleaned up. My legs feels like jello right about now.” You raise a brow and he grins.

“I think your massage turned off something in my legs.” You huff, incredulous, but sit up anyway.

“I’m good, but not that good.”

“Well, the sex certainly helped.” You laugh and lean down to give him a kiss, which is mostly smiling lips pressed against each other.

“Flatterer.”

“Hey, what can I say, you got magic fingers.” You smack his chest and laugh as you get up to go the bathroom, your own legs a little shaky, which Hotch doesn’t comment on, but you know he liked by the way he grins at you when you get back to the bed.

#aaron hotchner x male reader #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner smut #aaron hotchner #hotch smut #hotch x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds smut #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #smut #lemon #written #male!reader #aaron hotcner x male!reader #male reader #2000

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valenhell · 3 years

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From the studio that brought you “I can’t find good Byler fics in the ao3 tag”, comes:

"The Definitive Byler fic rec list"

Literally no one asked for this but because I spent the majority of last year (...and 2019, and 2018...) reading byler fics and coping with life, I thought I’d make a list of some of my absolute favorites.

The other day I was basically starving for some byler fics and the angel @magicalfairy provided me with some of her faves so I thought I’d do the same, because I love reading, and I love all of these fics and I appreciate their writers💗 And fic writers in general, come on!

- This is a mix of long works and one-shots/short stories. - Everything is mostly fluff with a tad of angst and a lot of internalized homophobia conflict. - Every fic is completed, except for the ones I mention that they are not. - I try my best to lay out the stories in a way that I won’t spoil you the plot but also warning you of some stuff you might don’t like. Either way, all of these fics are correctly tagged by their respective authors/owners, so read at your own risk. For better understanding, in between brackets I denote Rating, Words and quantity of Chapters. - I feel like I should clarify, none of these are narrated in the singular first person. None of that “And I told him...”, no.

Long fics

a dream always the same (T, 99k, 35 chapters) What happened in those few weeks between the Battle of Starcourt and the Byers leaving Hawkins. Literally a satisfying and very needed fill in of season three, with a good dose of Mike’s thoughts and conflict. Mike’s characterization is specially amazing in this one. The writing style is amazing and I know the author put everything into making it historically accurate, and it was really sweet. You probably read it, it’s by the amazing sevensided here on Tumblr🧡

Spring Break (T, 120k, 14/15 chapters) The slowburn of my dreams. Lots of internalized conflict and conflict with each other. Conflict within the Party (uhh kind of), conflict with Mike and Will. Byers family has moved and the kids are visiting! Chaos. Characterization is on point. Yeah, I know it’s unfinished, but the fourteenth chapter actually serves as a pretty nice ending.

This is where it starts (M, 148.8k, 24 chapters) Aged up characters. The Party is in college and Will disappears again, but now it’s different. Mike knows he didn’t vanish from thin air, and the discovery he and the Party end up making is pretty insane. Mystery solving/fantasy/third dimension, throw in a bit of D&D and Mike realizing some shit, and you get this marvelous fic. It’s a breath of fresh air. The world building is definitely one of the elements that stands out the most, because it’s very nicely described, it sounds like a dream and it’s completely immersive. Absolute gem of a fic.

there’s a Starman waiting in the sky (M, 30.6k, 8 chapters) Do I need to say anything? Will is out there living his best life and Mike realizes that wow, umm, maybe his best friend looks a bit too nice with that costume... and wait, is he getting horny? It’s actually really fun and sexy.

The Evening Speaks (T, 23k, 7 chapters) In where Mike is a late-night college radio host and Will is the art student that stays up till late to catch up with Wheeler on the Mic. They flirt through songs y’all, this one is really sweet.

heads or tails? (E, 24k, 3 chapters) Aged up characters. I know most people don’t enjoy sex in fics and with specific characters but this one is insanely well written. It’s a slowburn that commits to the tension and with every word you are grasping and anticipating their next move. I think you can find the author here on Tumblr as yousaidyes🧡

The Man of Average (M, 56.7k, 5/? chapters) Aged up characters. No but you don’t understand, the writing here is absolute gourmet. The story is exciting as well, it’s super interesting. Weirdly enough, for being very aged up characters, they are well characterized but they don’t feel like teenagers. They are naturally Mike and Will. The author really captured Mike and Will’s essence. I know, it’s unfinished and it’s updated very rarely, but this is the typical fic you can’t believe someone just posted on the internet for free. I will say though, I think it’s definitely not for everyone. Read at your own risk.

Heartstrings (E, 82.8k, 24/? chapters) Aged up characters. By the same author of The Man of Average. A collection of memories, the road to Mike and Will’s happy ever after. And fucking hell!!!!! You’ll cry and get angry, you’ll cheer for them, then you’ll want to crash their faces together because god dammit you love each other!!! But yeah, same thing here. The writing and the way the story is laid out as a nonlinear narrative is brilliant. And I also think this is one of the best Will versions I’ve read. The author might as well be the og creator of this two characters tbh. You can find the author here as mylesimeblr🧡

Sinners behind the walls (T, 1.5k, 1/1) And because I can’t stop recommending this author, a little thing of Mike tormenting himself but also being too deeply committed to Will.

The Red Envelope series (T/E, 167K, two completed works) Something happens that Will thought was impossible and from there, pure drama and romance. Anything by this author has the potential to become your absolute favorite fic, but this series in particular is amazing. I doubt that any of you haven’t read this, but it doesn’t hurt to put it in this list. I’m pretty sure the author is serendipitous-magic on Tumblr🧡

A New Fight series (T, 91k, two completed works, one WIP) And finally the Star Wars AU that we all needed. But this isn’t your typical “Mike is Han”, “Will is Leia” and “El is Luke”, it’s way more interesting than that, and the author has appropriated the Star Wars world like no other. I’ll admit I’m not a 100% fluent in SW lore but this is amazing to me either way. This author is also on Tumblr, tea-for-one-please🧡

- Yes, most of these are (if not all), in a way, canon compliant/canonverse/canon continuation into fanon. (In a way)

One-shots and short stories

Sundae for Two, Please (G, 4.8k) Steve being the supportive friend and older brother these kids collectively need. (not Jonathan erasure, we love him). Steve is very sweet himself, and this little cute thing through his POV is gorgeous. Yes, it’s byler.

Backstage (T, 10k, 2/2) Jonathan, you forgot to mention to Will how hot your new band’s guitarist is, dude. Now he’s hyperventilating and weirdly flirting with him in the corner. Background Stonathan because why not.

102 Peach Street (G, 3.8k) Established relationship, but not only that, they are married :’’))) PURE fluff. Extreme fluffiness. Diabetes.

sweatshirts and bottled up feelings (T, 3.2k) Or, Mike thinks that the sweatshirt Will wears looks insanely good on him. And kitchens are for lovers.

kiss it better (T, 16.3k) Basically one of the best character studies of a few precise moments of Mike and Will’s relationship and feelings.

will wonders ever cease (T, 11.3k) #i ship will and happiness. Omfg what a beautiful piece of fanfic. Will centric, this kid really deserves all the good in the world.

The Calm After the Storm (T, 1.6k) Tooth rotting fluff, boyfriends in love. Boyfriends being lazy, cuddling, love words, kisses. Boys loving each other’s company... Basically, Mike and Will in their element. What more can you ask for?

neither of us ready to let go (T, 4.8k) That scene from season three, but a bit of a fix it.

Still in love (G, 1k) Domestic, married life au fluff. Y’all, I’m a sucker for established Byler, even if I can’t find many fics with it. But this is very sweet. It takes place in 2020, but I don’t think there are any mentions of the COVID-19 crisis that I remember.

I Nver Find Out ‘Til I’m Head Over Heels (G, 12.5K) Classic 5+1 fic. If you haven’t read it, where have you been? This is your moment. In where Mike keeps inviting Will to the school dances and Will thinks it’s just a joke until he realizes it’s not.

Before You’re Gone (T, 5.9k) Will is leaving Hawkins and Mike thinks this is a great moment for a confession. This one I discovered last friday, thank you friend @magicalfairy 💗

You’re weird Wheeler (M, 4.5k) Mike unintentionally starts a tradition of going to each other to talk about their sexual encounters just after they finish. Will keeps getting more explicit with the details he shares, and he makes his best friend interested. This one is really fun y’all.

Out-Of-Town Friends (N/R, 4.6K) It’s not rated. I haven’t re- read it but I’d say it would probably fall in a T rating. So cute!! Will has new friends and sneaks off every friday and the Party doesn’t know where he is going, so Mike decides to follow him and is surprised.

Snowed Under (G, 1.3k) By the same author of The New Fight series. Mike is spending christmas by himself in college because a snowstorm hits Chicago and Nancy can’t drive to see him, but then he has a surprise visitor. Ahhh just a lil sweet holiday fic. Super cute.

you love me anyway series (T, 7.1k, three completed works) Literally just the cutest thing ever. Established Byler. Will loves to take pictures and he loves taking pictures of Mike. It’s adorable.

you wanna be friends forever (i can think of something better) (T, 9k) This one is so amazing. So. Amazing. From Will’s POV, my kid deserves the world and he gets it.

okay not to be okay (T, 4.9k) Mike is a bit sad but then everything is okay.

can’t hold out forever (G, 18.4k) Y’all!!!!! 5+1 sweetness. Mike has been falling in love since kindergarten. And it’s long af, you’ll enjoy it.

even if it takes forever (G, 1.3k) College short AU, they miss each other, they love each other, they promise all to each other. It is sappy y’all.

clear as day (N/R, 18.4K, 4 chapters) It’s not rated, but I’d say it falls in the T category. Strangers to friends to lovers. And also, everyone is pretty gay; we have our dynamic trio Mike, Max and El as disaster lesbians (and gay). Will works at the library and he is also gay. Lucas and Dustin and Will are the best friends we needed. It’s very sweet and the Party is kind of formed here!

I went overboard with the one-shots, so you must have realized how much I love long one-shots and I favor them over long works lmao but they are all amazing!!! If it’s on this list, I probably read it at 2 am, sobbing in my bed. So. Hope you enjoy it☺️🧡

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celestialrry · 3 years

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stood up

3.5k

hello everyone!!!! I've been awol for literally weeks because i had absolutely NO motivation to write but i finally finished this piece ˊᗜˋ so YAY. ALSOO thank you for following me, liking, and reblogging my pieces (it encourages me somuchsothankyouireallyappreciateit-- and remember reblogging really helps us writers :))) ) here’s a hug for all ur patience and feel free to send me asks or requests i love talking to you guys! ε(♡'-')з

summary: Harry keeps standing Y/N up. (request from @ballerinrry! thank u love)

warnings: cursing, mentions of alcohol and sex, angsty but with a happy ending cause for some reason i can never let them end on a bad note

Y/N was excited.

It had been a while since Harry had asked her to go on a date, it was always the other way around recently. She couldn’t blame him though, Y/N knew just how busy Harry always was, and it wasn’t like he was purposefully not asking her to go do things, he just had a lot on his plate.

That’s what she kept telling herself anyways.

It’s what she told herself when it had been 2 weeks since they had even eaten a meal together, and given the fact that just a few months ago Harry had come back to London for a while, that was rare. So, Y/N asked him to grab lunch on a Saturday while they were lying in bed together, and when he agreed, but failed to show up, leaving Y/N sitting at the cafe, her lips morphed into a frown and her eyes not focusing on the phone in front of her, she told herself he was simply booked up with meetings and studio time and such.

Thats what he told her when he got into bed that night to apologize for accidentally standing her up. She forgave him, of course, and suggested they could just get dinner the next week. He agreed, even walked around to his calander her to show her he was marking the date off in his calendar with a heart, her first initial, and 7:00 PM etched into the little box with red sharpie.

So, the week passed with quick kisses of good mornings and good nights, and while Harry was gone Y/N had on a black dress she had been excited to wear for a while now, with those little mini silver heels and a coat strung over her shoulders as she sat on her couch waiting for Harry to swing by to pick her up. She shot him a text that simply asked “You otw? xx”

He was not.

It took about 30 minutes of waiting on their couch to realize he was standing her up, again. And it took until the next morning for Harry to see her text (his phone had been on do not disturb while he was at the studio and he ended up spending the night at Sarah and Mitch’s after a few beers), and for the guilt to seep through his veins.

He apologized, again. And Y/N forgave him, again.

Only until it got to the point where Y/N no longer remembered the amount of times Harry had stood her up, for being at the studio, or sleeping after a meeting, or simply just not paying attention to his phone, she knew there was a problem.

Harry was fully aware of the problem too. He knew that this was no way to ever treat a partner, and if someone was doing this to him, he’d dump them— well, he’s never been one to end a relationship unless it was necessary, so that’s an exaggeration, but it’s the principle of the thing.

Which is why when he got home one day around 11 PM, gave her a kiss to the forehead after she sat up in their bed to give him a hug, and a soft “Can we talk?” escaped her lips, he knew he had to fix this. So he asked her if they could talk over dinner the next night, he just wanted to sleep but also wanted to fix things with his girl, asking her if she was free of course, before telling her he’s gonna make a reservation at that nice restaurant the two of them used to go to quite often, because “it’s been a while since I’ve taken my favorite girl out”.

A grin broke out on her face because he had asked her! And if Harry was planning it, there’s no way he’d cancel or stand her up.

So yeah, Y/N was excited.

She woke up that morning with a smile on her face, and something akin to a what she thinks a rainbow would feel like running through her veins. It had only been a few months since she’d last been on a date with her boyfriend of almost 2 years and a half in person, and she was going to make the most of it. Because after this date, things would change. They’d spend more time together again and it would be like this little bump (that neither had acknowledged) never happened.

Y/N did, well, everything to prepare. Took a long shower, shaved, put on that coconut lotion Harry likes— he tended to dig his face in her neck when he smelled it while holding her—, brushed her teeth more than 3 times, dug in her closet to find that one patterned soft purple dress she bought ages ago but never had a change to wear it, until now, put on those really cute heels Harry said he liked once (“Looks like something you’d wear on a runway pet, I love ‘em.”), and even styled her hair differently than normal.

He had told her he would swing by at 8 on the dot after the studio, and soon enough, it was 8, with no sign from the man who made the promise himself. Y/N thought maybe there was traffic, he was just running late, texted him a quick, “Can’t wait to see you!! xxx” and put her phone on the coffee table, waiting on their couch.

8 turned to 9, 9 turned to 10, 10 turned to 11, and soon it was midnight. Y/N doesn’t think she’d ever felt more empty than how she felt then, walking to their shared room of a year, slipping off her heels and tossing them towards the closet, as well as pulling her dress over herself and letting it fall to the floor behind her, grabbing that one t-shirt she always wears when she needs comfort (which just happened to an extra 2018 Live on Tour shirt Harry had laying around that she snatched just 3 months into them dating), and flopping into bed.

She couldn’t fall asleep, and instead spent her time curled up in their bedsheets, a steady flow of tears making their way down her blush covered cheeks.

。:°ஐ

Harry usually didn’t make mistakes.

Sure, he had his moments, grabbing the wrong coffee off the counter when his name was called at the cafe, forgetting to text Jeff that he actually couldn’t make it to a meeting that was scheduled in a few hours. Just little things, things that didn’t matter that much, and could always be fixed. He didn’t usually make mistakes that weren’t easy to fix. He just wasn’t that kind of guy.

Until, he was.

Harry loved Y/N. He loved having her around, loved spending time with her, loved loving on her, loved kissing her, loved touching her, loved the way she went about almost everything. He was so in love with her, that hurting her was out of the question. He never wanted to be the one to make her cry, make her bottom lip quiver before the tears rushed out like he’d seen many times before, due to movies, his songs (which as sadistic as it sounds was an ego builder to have someone so close to him so affected by the music he wrote), her school work, or even her friends that weren’t being so nice.

In fact, he was so in love with her, even being so afraid of commitment (it took him over a year of them dating to ask her to move in), all he wanted to do was blurt out those 4 dreaded words. “Will you marry me?” It was a bond for life, and he was terrified of that, but with Y/N all he wanted to do was spend the rest of his living days with her.

When Harry had come back from being in L.A. for so long and finally being in the same city as his girlfriend back at their home, all they did was spend time together. Every time he saw Y/N all he wanted to do was say those 4 words that he hadn’t even fully come to terms with himself. It was dangerous, and Harry’s self control when it came to Y/N was lacking, so he simply did was every normal person would do in his situation.

He stood her up.

Many more times than he could count, and of course he felt like the shittiest person in the world— shittiest boyfriend in the world—but at least now she can’t possibly be under the impression that he wanted to marry her, which is what he wanted. Or thought he wanted, until Sarah called him up one day after he had stood Y/N up for dinner the night before and told him off. Told Harry just how fucking terrible he made Y/N feel, how unwanted she thought she was, how she felt like they were loosing their relationship, and Harry didn’t know what to do with himself. (Of course Y/N had sobbed to Sarah about it over the phone while she was drunk off the wine she opened 40 minutes after Harry said he would be there, so she really didn’t even remember the conversation).

And later that day Harry had come home, heard her wavering voice asking if they could talk, and decided in his head he would tell her how he felt, how sorry he was, and how he wanted to be with her forever and love her forever if she allowed him. He had a few expectations for their dinner, that Y/N would probably tell him how he’s made her feel, and Harry would apologize, tell her why he did it, explain he thought it was no excuse, then tell her he plans on marrying her (obviously not proposing just yet, but finally bringing up the conversation they had never had even though they were in a serious committed relationship) and they’d go back home, have the most amazing sex ever, and forget about the whole thing.

What Harry didn’t expect was to get a call from Jeff around 5 asking him to come to the studio to fix few vocals, then end up nailing down 2 songs in one night, go to a bar with the band to celebrate, get drunk, then pass out at Mitch and Sarahs flat.

But that’s what happened, according to Mitch, who woke Harry up the very next morning.

“Good morning man, wakey wakey,” Mitch’s teasing tone echoed through Harry’s (what felt like full of vodka) brain as he groaned and squinted his eyes. “Why are you waking me up at this hour in the morning?” Harry asked drearily, sighing and simultaneously regretting last night as a whole because the last thing he wanted to do while hungover was be up before at least 9 AM.

“We’ve gotta go to meet with Jeff about tour in like a hour, H” Mitch stated .

At Mitch’s words Harry sat up on their couch, eyes wide in fear. “Wait mate, I thought tha’ meeting was on Wednesday.”

“It is Wednesday H, god how drunk did we let you get last night…” Mitch said, beginning to recount some of Harry’s antics the night before. Harry however, couldn’t hear a thing with the blood pumping through his ears. If today was Wednesday, that meant yesterday was Tuesday, and he went and got trashed at a bar with his friends Tuesday night when— when he was supposed to be on a date with Y/N, when he was supposed to confess his intentions, when he was supposed to apologize for standing her up over and over, yet instead he went and did it again.

Now this, this was a mistake.

“…H. H. Harry? Are you there?” Mitch’s voice came back into focus and Harry shook his head. “I- fuck, I was supposed to take Y/N out last night.” Harry said, his voice trembling.

‘I’m sure she’ll forgive you, it’s just one night.” Mitch tried to make Harry feel better. He knew Y/N was a very forgiving person, she would get over this in no time.

“No, she won’t. I-I’ve stood her up for the past month and a half, Mitch.”

At these words, Mitch stands straight up making pained eye contact with Sarah in the kitchen who was overhearing most of this conversation with her eyes wide. She had no idea it was this bad. “Month and a half? I thought it was just that one time a few weeks ago, Harry what the hell is wrong with you?” Harry simply shook his head and didn’t reply. He had absolutely no idea how to make it up to her. “I-fuck, I don’t know Mitch!” Harry raised his voice. “I need to see her and apologize, now.” Harry said, standing up and rushing over to the front door and slipping on his shoes.

“This meeting is mandatory Harry, as much as I want you to see her too, she’d probably still asleep, and I don’t think this can be solved in under an hour.” Mitch said calmly, already knowing Harry was close to walking out his door. Harry stayed silent for a moment, weighing the options. Either go apologize to his girlfriend, or prioritize himself over her again.

“We can do it another day, I’m sorry, but I have to go see her, tell Jeff I feel sick.” And he walked out without another word.

。:°ஐ

The morning after Harry stood Y/N up again was brutal.

She stayed up all night, replaying moments with Harry in her head, analyzing if he wanted to be there with her, wondering if maybe he felt like he had to stay with her out of pity. It was torture, and the pain seemed to turn into numbness as time went by, and eventually the sun came up, and she stayed in bed, her motivation lost.

A loud crash and “Fuck!” woke her up, swollen eyes fluttering open to the invasive noise. Y/N furrowed her brows, her mind connecting everything that happened yesterday and unfortunately reminding her of the unbearable pain she went through the night before. A groan escaped her lips as she sat up and flung her legs out of her bed sheets that had been flung off the bed in the middle of the night. She began grumbling to herself as she made her way downstairs, ready to tell Harry off for making so much noise.

Her mouth stopped moving, and instead remained in limbo as her eyes met Harry’s. His mouth opened to speak, but his words were caught in his throat as he saw the state she was in. It was when her mouth pressed into a line that he could begin talking. “Y/N, baby, please I know you don’t wanna see me or talk t’me right now but I’m so fuckin’ sorry, love. So so sorry, it was an accident, I went t’ the studio to fix a few things then got hung up on the songs and by the time we went to celebrate I completely lost track of time, and I was too drunk to drive home so I crashed at Mitch’s.”

Her mouth fell open at his words. Everything was happening too fast. Hearing that he stood her up to drink at a fucking bar to celebrate himself, then coming home and accidentally knocking over a glass in their kitchen (which she put together was the crash earlier after seeing the shards of broken glass on the floor) frustrated her to no end. She couldn’t bring herself to look at him any longer, and Harry had stopped talking after realizing what he just admitted to her. Without another glance, instead of looking at Y/N’s tear stained face, all he saw was her back, walking up the stairs to their room.

“Fuck,” He said to himself before following her up the pink stairs. “Y/N, love wait-please, I’m so sorry, I just need to talk to you, I need to explain myself, please.” He begged as she shut their bedroom door in his face, his voice turning into a desperate whine at the end.

。:°ஐ

It’s been 3 days since then, and she hasn’t spoken to him. He would leave in the mornings, kissing her forehead and mumbling an “I love you” and telling her exactly what time he’d be home, before leaving and coming back on time to find an empty plate in the sink and her lying in their bed, whether it be reading, scrolling on her phone, or typing on her laptop. He would apologize many times, reaching his hand out for hers and she would simply situate herself in their bed and lay down, back turned to him.

Harry just couldn’t take it anymore.

It was when she had finally let him kiss her forehead goodnight that he decided to take his chance. “Y/N.” He spoke softly, with no response or anything to indicate she heard him. “Baby, can we please talk- or I’ll talk and you listen, I just- I really need to say some things.”

She was still faced away from him when he leaned against their headboard and he decided to keep going.

“I- um. I’m sure you know how sorry I am, but I really am- sorry I mean. Not just for tonight but for every other time I’ve stood you up. I’m so sorry for not showing you how much you matter to me, and how much the things you do matter to me.”

It was then that she slowly sat up next to him and looked at him, eyes begging him to continue. He blushed at her intense eye-contact that he had barely gotten over the past few days and took a breath, opting to look at his hands fidgeting in his lap.

“We’ve been together for 2 and almost a half years, which is the longest relationship I’ve been in, and it’s no excuse to treat you this way, but I had just been thinking about how things progress even further than now,” He coughs. “Which is marriage, and when I finally came home, all I wanted to do was ask you to marry me- I don’t- m’not proposing right now, I just- I got really scared because wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone is crazy to me,

I’ve never thought that way about anyone else until you, I didn’t even really want to get married before you, and I started to distance myself before I ended up telling you this, but obviously that blew up in my face.” He chuckled a bit, locking eyes with her unreadable ones for a moment and lifting a hand to run through his hair. “What I’m trying to say, is that I love you, so so much, and I plan on marrying you— obviously if you want to too, of course— and I’m so sorry for trying to make you think that I didn’t care about you anymore or love you any less, because it’s the complete opposite of that.”

His eyes were watery now, as he started down at his interlocked fingers, and his eyes widened when her hand was gently placed over his own. “Harry,” Y/N began. “Look at me, please.”

His head lifted to see her facing him, her brows knitted and a small smile on her face. “I forgive you, okay? I could tell you were kind of scared of commitment when we first started dating, and I wish I could say your reason for standing me up is surprising but it’s not.” They both chuckled a bit at this. “I- I’m still upset at you, I need you to know that, because 2 months of thinking the love of your life is avoiding you doesn’t feel all too great, so you suck for that,” she said, planting a quick kiss to his cheek which quickly turned pink. “But Harry, even if you asked me to marry you a year ago I would have said yes. I love you, so much, and I plan on spending the rest of my life with you as well. I’m sorry for giving you the silent treatment, it was… unnecessary and immature. So, thank you for apologizing. I love you.” She confessed again.

“S’okay, I deserved it, and I love you too. Maybe even more. So um, we’re okay?” Harry asked, a hopeful smile on his face.

She nodded with a smile and pulled him into a much needed hug and pulled away only for him to bring her into an even more needed kiss. “If you ever try to pull that shit again, I’m breaking up with you.” She laughed and he tackled her into the sheets hiding his face in her neck.

“Duly noted, love. Duly noted.”

#harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #Harry Styles #harry styles angst #im pretty proud of this one #if I do say so myself #harry styles fanfiction #its kinda short tho sorry

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parsnipspages · 3 years

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Hey Alex! I have a headcanon request! How would be the brothers and dateables react to realizing they want to marry Mc after Mc protects Luke from a Lesser demon (*Cough* beats the hell out of the demon by them self! And didn't get a scratch lol *Cough*) Thank you, stay safe and get some sleep!

TW: A mention of blood and alluded violence. This is written assuming that you have been with a specific character for a time before this. Most likely after arc 2 somewhere. This is a LONG one folks! Just over 2k words in total. GN!MC as always, with literally everyone that isn't Luke!

~~~~~

The first thing he heard was Luke shouting, the next, You shouting. His first instinct was his only thought as he threw himself into a sprint. He had to help you. To protect you from any that would bring you harm. His worry it seems, was misplaced. Arriving at the scene he found you standing over a lesser demon with your hand still curled into a fist. The last echos of a spell hung in the air and sizzled at the lessor demons unconscious face as the blood evaporated from its heat. You glanced back then, looking over to Luke, thrilled as he was that you had managed this. Then your gaze hit him. He had never loved you more.

BROTHERS Lucifer He had been ready to more or less go to war for you, but he didn't seem to need to. Lucifer was quick to chastise you for being so rash but he was practically preening from your resounding success. His dear human had come so far since the start of the exchange. After his stern words and thorough examination of your condition, he did complement your victory. Such things should be rewarded, and a dinner out with him seemed to be more than enough. Perhaps he could finally have the conversation he had been hoping to find a place for. Surely you were ready for life in the Devildom at this point, especially one by his side. He was glad now that he had already thought out that moment a thousand times, then a thousand more. The perfect dinner, the perfect speech, the perfect ring. The perfect spouse. He would have it all. Mammon The fastest of his brothers, Mammon saw you land that blow on whatever poor sap tried to touch Luke. The demon giving a pained wheeze as they hit the grass of the mall. He could barely hear the little angel celebrating behind him as he rushed up to you and wrapped his arms around your waist and his wings around your shoulders. Going on and on about how he had taught you so well. You were okay. You were more than okay! You had won! The question fell from his lips before he could even think to stop it, having been on the tip of his tongue for months. Mammon froze as his flush raced down his back, waiting to play it off as a joke if you said no. Hoping beyond hope he wouldn't have to. He had the ring in his pocket anyway, he even saved up to get that stone you liked... Leviathan Leviathan had been at school that day, somehow, though that didn't matter now. He was out of his seat as soon as he heard your aggrieved voice ringing in the air in that same tone you used to command him and his brothers with your pacts. By the time he had made it to you you were busy fussing over Luke, holding his cherubic face in your hands and looking him over with worry painting your features. He felt jealous now, if only a little, as he caught his breath and walked up behind you, wrapping his tail around your middle and nuzzling his way into the crook of your neck, mumbling everything between praise and fretting over your well-being. He never wanted to let you go again, he couldn't wait forever. Plans brewed in his mind of taking you somewhere special, maybe that beach you had liked... or maybe one of the many quiet corners of the Devildom where you two would hide away and chat the hours away... so many options. He couldn't let himself mess this up. Not this. Satan His tail lashing as he ran, Wrath itself raced down the halls as Satan came to your aid. Abandoning his book-bag in the library nothing crossed his mind as he focused solely on whatever piece of garbage had threatened his love. All of his thoughts of violence and retribution came to a crashing halt as he saw you, standing over the unconscious demon now bleeding into the grass. Luke huffed indignantly as he rushed to your side, clawed hand carefully running over your waist as he stares into your eyes looking for any hint of fear or pain. He found none, and pulled you into a kiss before smiling. He should have known better than to worry about you. Stronger than steel with nerves to match. Maybe he had been wrong when he had thought that staying with him would be too risky for you. You were the most amazing things in his world, and he was willing to do so much to keep that. He had plans to make now, and they would be perfect, just like you. Asmodeus Asmodeus wasn't usually one to be found running, let alone sprinting, yet here he found himself. His wings aiding him as he hopped over railings and ledges focusing only on reaching your side. To save you from whatever ugly low life would dare touch his darling. He didn't stop until you were in his arms, his fingers worrying at every piece of you as he babbled. He hadn't even seen the damage you had dealt to the demon, more concerned with every little hair on your pretty little head. It took a

few minutes to calm Asmo enough for him to stop preening over you before he saw what you had done. He tisk-ed as he looked over your nails and knuckles, covered in the fine dust of a magical spell. He took you then, back to his room so he could fix what you did to your lovely nails and hands. As he ran the polish back over your nails and saw the way you were watching him with that little smile on your face, he came to a realization. His hands stilled as the thought hit him, he had never wanted this before. There was always room for something new though, and you were the most welcome of changes he could imagine. Beelzebub Beelzebub had promised. That night he made his pact with you he promised to protect you, and he had already failed once before. Never again. Thankfully for him and the school buildings he was never far from your side nowadays. His demon form boiled to the surface as he sprinted to you from across the mall. Your fist slamming into the lessor demon before he had even made it to you. Their body hitting the ground as he came to a stop in front of you and Luke. He gave the angel a glance as he rubbed his knuckles and stared down at you. Your face lit up when you saw him, fist still raised as that sparkle lit your eye. Maybe you could protect yourself now, just a little. Beel frowned a bit as that now familiar warmth spread into his chest and onto his cheeks. You were so strong, and so amazing. He ignored Luke as he carefully picked you up and set to taking you to one of his favorite spots to picnic with you. A lunch date was in order after all of that, you had to be hungry right? And he had a conversation to have that would be between just the two of you. Belphegor Normally impossible to wake, Belphegor was attuned to your emotions now. His magic flowing through your shared pact telling him your emotional state at all times. Your rage had brought him back to the land of the wakeful, jumping from his nap spot near a heat register to run to you. Though when he arrived he had to laugh as he saw that lesser demon sprawled out stupidly on the grass. He could smell your magic on the air, the delicate spice of it tickling his nose as he sauntered up to you and tapped you on the head with his bushy tail tip. Look at that. You made him run all the way over here and for what? Nothing. Now you owed him a nap session, no fighting it. His fingers laced into yours as he lead you away from Luke, ignoring the chihuahua as he yapped away. His yawn covering his smile as he looked at you. You were stronger now, he knew that. Maybe now you would be comfortable to stay with him. He had a question or two, and he desperately needed your reply. ~~NOW DATABLES~~ Diavolo Diavolos' thoughts were twofold as he ran to you. One, his mind desperately clinging to the hope that you were okay. Two, what student at his school was getting expelled for aggrieving that which was his. He almost ran into you as he came upon the mall, shocked for a moment to see your raised fist and the felled demon below you as Luke cheered for your victorious actions and quick thinking. Diavolo could feel the familiar hiss of your magic on the air and he carefully placed a hand onto your shoulder, asking quietly what had happened. He was shocked to find that you were defending Luke in much the same way as he had intended to defend you. His warm smile spread across his face as he grabbed your hand and kissed your knuckles. Another thing to add to his list of reasons for loving you. Another reason to propose the idea of letting the public know he had found someone he wanted to officially court. He could almost see the looks on the elders faces when they found out, and he couldn't wait to have your permission to announce that much to them. Barbatos You would have thought that Barbatos would have seen this coming with his powers long ago. Alas he had promised both himself and you that he would let you have the surprise and the enjoyment of your time together without the careful pruning of timelines. You had said that the little mistakes kept things

interesting. A fistfight on the mall was not a little mistake. Neither you or Luke were quite sure when he had arrived, nor how he got there. His gloved hands ran over your knuckles as he stood between you and the cretin who had dared threaten both you and Luke alike. Not only his love, but the angel boy he cared so much for. Before long the lesser demon was dragged away and you found yourself in the kitchen watching the two bake away. Barbatos letting Luke do much of the work as he thought on his feelings from the day. He couldn't bare to let anyone bring you harm or forbid lose you to another. Maybe a little dip into human tradition was in order. Simeon The angel had left you and Luke only momentarily to run back to a classroom and grab a couple of forgotten notes. Simeon was stressing already when he heard Luke yelling, that feeling boiling over into borderline panic as your voice joined his. Notes forgotten once again he ran back to the mall. His heels deafeningly loud on the stone as his mind raced. Coming around the corner he saw the demon on the ground bleeding. Your magic hanging languidly in the air. You with your hand on Luke's' back as you lead him away from the scene. The smaller angel babbling on about how you had showed that demon what was what. His hand fell over his chest as he let out a breath and jogged to the two of you. Simeons arm wrapping carefully around your shoulders as his other hand found your arm. He had thought he had the will to fight the urge to make you his. To save himself and luke the possible consequences. But seeing you defending the boy. Seeing you doing what you thought was right by your family. He knew that those consequences didn't matter, you were more than they would ever be. Solomon Solomon wasn't typically one for worrying. He knew that you had your pacts to keep you safe and beyond that you had the spells he had been teaching you. He couldn't help but worry though, as he heard your shouts and Luke's and the distinct crackle of a force spell being cast. A recent addition to your arsenal and you were already having to use it. He came to you as fast as he could, stopping the reaction he had been brewing safely before coming to you. The lessor demon was standing by that time, rubbing their jaw as they stood and wincing at the burns from your spell. Solomon found you sitting with Luke and Simeon at a bench as you regaled the tale to Simeon. He leaned against the wall beside you as you spoke and he waited. He waited for Simeon to meet his eye and take Luke away to Purgatory hall. He waited for the brothers to say their goodbyes for the evening. He had waited for over a month already, and tonight he would stop holding back. He was allowed to be happy, and so were you.

#Anonymous #obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke #obey me MC #obey me HC #obey me Headcanons #parsnips printings #Headcanon heresy

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babymetaldoll · 3 years

Text

I love you (and I don't want to) (Spencer Reid/Reader)

Requested: Yes

Summary: After three years in love with Spencer, (Y/N) decides it's time to move on. He will never love her anyway, right?

Category: Angst/Fluffy ending

Word count: 4,2K

Warnings: Cursing, but you love me anyway 💜

Masterlist

It had been three years of her life. Three whole years she had been in love with Spencer Reid. But (Y/N) couldn't deal with those feelings anymore. She didn't want to continue torturing herself, waiting for him. Why? 'cos for him, (Y/N) was just his friend, his very best friend. But nothing more. And she wanted more. She wanted everything with him, and after three years, she knew she wasn't going to get it.

(Y/N) had hinted to Spencer in every possible way that she was in love with him, but he hadn't acted on it. She actually felt pathetic. (Y/N) thought she couldn't be any more obvious about her feelings. The only thing she hadn't done was kissing Reid. And she wasn't going to because it was clear all she was going to get was rejection.

That's why, after three years postponing her own life, waiting around to see if Spencer might actually see her as a woman and not as a friend, she was done. She had to move on from him, even if it was the hardest thing she had ever done.

But working with Spencer didn't make it easier. There he was, every morning, smiling at her from his desk. Asking her how she had spent the night, what she had done. Even inviting her over to his apartment for a movie night. Which with Spencer actually meant watching movies and nothing else. Nothing. Not even holding hands.

In three years, the most physical (Y/N) had even been with Spencer had been the day she got shot in a leg, and he hugged her when she rejoined the team after her leave.

One hug in three years. That was it. Spencer was way more physical with Morgan, or with anyone else, as a matter of fact. That's why it was time to let him go. (Y/N) knew she wasn't going to find another man like him, though maybe that was the idea.

She loved him so much it hurt, and she needed to get rid of that pain.

(Y/N) knew she could get a man's attention if she wanted to. That's why it was so frustrating not being able to get Spencer's. Decided to get him out of his mind, (Y/N) dragged Emily and García for a "Lady's night." And by the end of the evening, she had given her number to three different guys. Neither of them was Spencer Reid, but at least (Y/N) felt her ego boost from getting their attention.

- "(Y/N)! I still can't get over how hot that guy was!! did he call you already?"- Penelope walked through the bullpen straight to (Y/N) 's desk, ignoring everybody but her friend. (Y/N) bit her lips and closed her eyes for a second, embarrassed her friend had literally yelled to the whole FBI they had met a cute guy the night before.

- "What? Who?"- Derek Morgan nearly jumped and rubbed his hands together, excited to hear the story, and walked with Garcia to (Y/N) 's desk.

Spencer raised his eyes from the file he was reading and scanned (Y/N) 's face. She was blushed, obviously nervous, and biting her lips as she smiled. What? Was she excited? Happy? Annoyed? and who was Garcia talking about? what guy? (Y/N) wasn't dating anyone. He would know. He knew everything she did. Not that he was a stalker or anything, but he listened each time she talked, and she usually told him everything she did.

Did she? Maybe not anymore. Spencer realized he needed to know what Garcia was talking about, so he pretended to be working but paid all of his attention to that conversation.

- "Thank you, Penelope"- (Y/N) huffed and shook her head- "I don't think Anderson heard you, by the way."

- "I heard her!"- Anderson raised his hand and waved- "Hot guy, she can't get over him"

- "Thank you!"- (Y/N) smiled at Anderson and covered her face with both hands.

- "Oh, come on! Don't be shy. You are not shy. And last night's (Y/N) wasn't shy either!"- Penelope tapped on (Y/N) 's back, as she grabbed the closest chair and moved it to her desk- "So, did he call?"

- "Who are you guys talking about?"- Morgan asked, crossing his arms on his chest, staring at the two women- "What did you do last night?"

- "Turns out this lady right here is the best party girl I've ever met, and in all these years, she had never shown this side of her! Ever!"- Penelope was clearly under the effect of three cups of coffee.

- "What did she do?"

- "Oh my beloved Morgan, you should have seen her!"- Garcia started explaining, and Spencer realized his stomach, as well as his fists, were tightening.

- "Please, don't!"- (Y/N) begged, but it was useless.

- "She was a lioness in the wild, and the hottest guys in the club were her prey. She danced with only the most attractive men in the whole place. And she flirted, and laughed, enchanted them all. Guys were asking for her phone number the whole time we were in that club. I swear I had never seen anything like it before."

- "What?! this pretty lady right here?"- Morgan pointed at (Y/N), who was still covering her face with both hands- "She always refuses to go out clubbing with me."

- "Well, clearly she was hiding her wild side"- Garcia sentenced and nodded at her own words- "So, did he call already?"

- "No. He hasn't"

- "Who?"- Prentiss asked, joining the conversation- "Bachelor number three? Please tell me you are gonna marry that man. It would be a crime not to."

The fact even Prentiss was drooling over that unknown guy hit Spencer harder. He knew (Y/N) was gorgeous and that she could get any guy's attention if she wanted to. But in the last three years, she had ignored every man who had flirted with her. Why the sudden change?

Spencer knew he couldn't ask (Y/N) not to flirt or go out with anyone, just 'cos he loved her in silence. Reid wished he could tell her how he felt, but he knew it was impossible for her to love him. She always took special care of him. She was always there when no one else was. But Spencer considered it as a gesture of friendship, not of love. He was so blind, he had wasted three years of happiness by her side, only because he was sure someone like her could never want someone like him.

Lucky for Spencer (or unlucky in a way), he didn't have to listen to that conversation for much longer. Hotch asked the team for the reports of the last three cases they had worked on, which meant they had a busy day ahead, and the bullpen was silent for most of the day.

Until (Y/N) 's phone hummed around noon, and Prentiss jumped from her desk.

- "Is it him?! is he?"- (Y/N) looked at Emily in shock- "What?"

- "You are acting like a schoolgirl. Put your shit together."

- "Shut up and let me live my life through you for a second! is that him?"- (Y/N) grabbed her phone and nodded. Spencer looked at her friend and held his breath. What was happening? Why was she clubbing and meeting guys all of a sudden?

- "I can't stop thinking about you. I hope you are having a great day. Wanna have dinner with me tonight?"- (Y/N) read out loud and bit her lips.

- "Please say yes and ask him for a picture."

- "Garcia already found pictures of him online"- (Y/N) announced Emily and showed her the mail she had gotten from their friend- "She checked his whole life. And he wasn't lying. The guy is a pediatrician, he is single, never been in jail, gives lots of money to charity...."

- "And he is so hot, Ryan Reynolds would be jealous of him. Seriously (Y/N), please date him. You deserve to be happy, and that guy is screaming, "I could make you happy."

Emily had never been the kind of woman to say those things out loud in the bullpen, during work, knowing anyone might hear her. But that was precisely what she wanted.

She knew Spencer was paying attention. And she wanted him to listen to what was going on because it might be the only way to make him see he had to tell (Y/N) what he really felt for her before it was too late.

Prentiss knew Spencer was in love with (Y/N), though he had denied it every time she had confronted him about his feelings. But you can't hide those things from profilers. Less from profilers who are also your best friends.

Emily knew (Y/N) loved him too, and it was nerve-wracking watching them waste their time and neither of them doing anything to be together.

Maybe the fact (Y/N) was getting someone else's attention would make Spencer react. If not, well, maybe (Y/N) would get a chance to be happy with the club's hot guy.

The hot guy from the bar had a name. It was Benjamin, and he took (Y/N) our for dinner that night. He had been lovely and charming, just like he had been when they met at the club. So sweet and charming, in fact, (Y/N) felt he might be the one who could take Spencer from her heart. That's why, when he asked her out again later that week, she accepted.

- "Oh my god!"- JJ walked to (Y/N) in shock- "Who sent you these?"- there was a gigantic bouquet of red roses on (Y/N) 's desk, and the owner was staring at them, absolutely blushed. In three years, no one had sent her flowers. It was impossible not to feel special.

- "Benjamin"- (Y/N) whispered and opened the card that came with the roses- "He asked me out, again."

- "You know, red roses are the most common flower to give to a woman."- Spencer had made his best to stay out of that conversation and every conversation related to Benjamin in the last week and a half. But he couldn't do it anymore.

He was done.

- "Worldwide, everybody gives red roses to say "I love you," turning a beautiful flower into a sad and empty cliché."- Spencer stood up from his desk and walked over (Y/N) and JJ, staring at the bouquet.

- "Sad and empty?"- (Y/N) stood up and crossed her arms on her chest, defensive- "Why would you say that?"

- "When everybody does it, the gesture might turn into something meaningless. A banality."

JJ looked at Spencer and at (Y/N). Since Benjamin was in the picture, it was clear their friendship was in trouble. Reid was more distant and (Y/N) was focused on her date. You didn't need to be a profiler to see what was going on, and JJ knew the wise thing to do was to take a step back and leave the two of them to fix their problems on their own.

Something JJ knew was never going to happen, 'cos Reid would be passive-aggressive and (Y/N) would get annoyed and leave.

- "Why are you so bitter today, Spencer? It's just flowers?"- (Y/N) asked him and raised an eyebrow. Reid mimicked her movement and crossed his arms on his chest as well.

- "I'm not bitter, (Y/N). I'm just telling you this gesture of love that's melting your heart is nothing but a cheap way to get under your skirt."

Morgan, Prentiss, and JJ wide opened their eyes at Spencer's words. But (Y/N) didn't even flinch.

- "And since when do you care if someone is trying to get under my skirt?"- she asked, staring into Reid's eyes.

- "I don't."

- "Then why are you telling me this?"

- "I just thought you were smarter than this. I guess I was wrong."

You could feel the tension growing between them. And the sparks coming from (Y/N) 's eyes that were filled with anger.

Spencer regretted every word that had left his lips ever since he stood up, but he couldn't take them back. What was done was done. And so, he could feel (Y/N) 's friendship and love slipping through his fingers with every word he said.

Later that night, Spencer couldn't sleep. It wasn't late, but he hadn't had a proper rest for weeks. Since he first heard (Y/N) was out clubbing with her friends, actually. And now that she was dating someone else, there was no way Spencer could close his eyes.

He felt awful after what he had told her, and he kept trying to come up with an idea to apologize to her. In three years, they had never fought before. Well, he had never been so jealous of anyone getting her attention in the last three years.

He couldn't shake the thought of her being on a date with Ben at that very same minute. They were together. She was laughing. And that would be enough for that guy to fall in love with her. How couldn't he? (Y/N) was perfect. Spencer knew it.

Reid paced like a lion in his apartment. He sipped his third cup of herbal tea, trying to follow (Y/N) 's advice to reduce caffeine at night in a useless effort to sleep better. But he knew coffee wasn't the reason he wasn't going to get any sleep that night. It was (Y/N). (Y/N) and all the feelings he had for her.

Why couldn't he just tell her he loved her? Why did he have to hold those feelings back for so long? Was it too late to tell her? Of course, it was! and even if (Y/N) wasn't in love with Ben, that didn't mean she'd ever love Reid. They were friends, and that was it.

The hum of his cellphone took Spencer from his thoughts. Somehow reading "we've got a case" on the screen made him feel better. At least now he had something else to think about. Reid could focus on saving lives instead of his own misery.

The case could be solved. His personal life couldn't.

Work was where Spencer could hide. It was his escape from his own problems, from his head, and his tendency to overthink everything.

Work was his refugee, his temple. A place he could even call home.

And that's why he lost it when he saw (Y/N) holding some guy's hand in the hall outside the elevator, in the BAU.

- "What are you doing?"- Reid wasn't even subtle at that point. He ignored Penelope, Morgan, Prentiss, and JJ. Needless to say, he also ignored that random man he knew was Benjamin.

- "Hi Spencer"- (Y/N) cut him a short smile and tried to act normal, but she knew it wasn't going to happen.

- "We've got a case."

- "Hi! Nice to meet you. I'm Benjamin"- Ben tried to shake Reid's hand, but Spencer didn't just ignore him. The glance he gave him was so cold and annoyed, (Y/N) was embarrassed already.

- "Don't mean to be rude, but what the fuck are you doing here? Do you think you can come and visit the FBI whenever you want to?"

The whole team was silent. Spencer's words resonated through the empty halls. (Y/N) felt her heart stop and her cheeks turning red with embarrassment and anger.

- "I'm sorry,"- Ben whispered and cleared his throat- "I should go."

- "No, please."- (Y/N) held his hand tighter and turned to him, knowing Spencer was staring at every move she made.

- "You have to work. I just came to drop you off. Take care, ok?"- Ben said, smiling. (Y/N) nodded and slowly leaned in and kissed him.

Spencer's heart dropped. That was it. He couldn't deal with that anymore. Reid turned around and rushed out the hall.

What had he done? What had she done? That was it. He was screwed.

- "Spence?"- JJ found him hidden in the conference room, sitting at a chair, his head resting on the table, covered with both hands.

- "What?"- he whispered, but didn't move- "I know, I know"- he added before JJ would say anything- "I ruined it all."

- "Why don't you just tell her what you feel?"- she asked her and sat by his side. But Spencer still didn't move.

- "What for?"

- "For starters, to apologize for being a dick today."

- "It's useless, JJ."

- "Why?"- Reid sighed and turned slowly to look at his friend. JJ smiled at him kindly and shook her head- "It's not useless, Spence. She loves you."

- "She loves me as a friend."

- "No, she is in love with you. The only reason she is dating Ben is that she needs to get over you 'cos she is sure you don't love her."

Spencer looked at JJ in silence, trying to put those ideas together. But they made no sense.

- "There's no way (Y/N) loves me."

- "She does. She has been in love with you for the last three years, Spence. And if I were you, I'd apologize to her, and I'd tell her the truth."

- "She really loves me?"- Spencer whispered, and JJ nodded- "Why didn't you tell me before?"

- "I tried to tell you a million times before, you wouldn't believe me! now try to find a way to fix this before you lose her!"

Reid stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. JJ was right; he had to fix everything. He had to win (Y/N) 's love back.

But Hotch and the rest of the team walked into the conference room that minute, including (Y/N). And his plans were forced to be paused until that serial killer was caught.

That was a miserable case. Not only because the unsub was killing lonely older women, and no one noticed most of the victims because no one would visit them. Which made the trail of murders was nearly untraceable. But because Spencer and (Y/N) weren't even looking at each other during the whole time they were investigating, and to call it "awkward" was being subtle.

It was hell for both of them.

Being in the jet was torture, 'cos there was nowhere to hide from each other. When Hotch asked them to go to the last crime scene together was the worst. (Y/N) had to ask Emily to go instead 'cos she knew she couldn't deal with Spencer at that minute.

And all that time, all Reid could think about was that kiss. The image of (Y/N) kissing Ben in front of him, and the words JJ had said. That (Y/N) loved him, and that was the reason why she was doing all that.

Solving that case was more complex than he expected because he couldn't put his mind to it. All he could think of was (Y/N).

On the jet back to Quantico, Spencer sat in front of her, decided to talk to her. But she stood up and left in a second, not giving him the chance to open his mouth. JJ stared at him and cut him a short smile, trying to encourage him not to lose faith. Spencer knew (Y/N) was mad at him, and she would act her worst when she was upset. But this time, he knew he had fucked it up. There was no other way to explain it.

Saying "Sorry" wouldn't do it. Spencer would have to do better.

But how?

(Y/N) reached her house and closed the door behind her back, still making her best not to cry. She had held those tears back for two days now since she had fought with Spencer, and she refused to weep over him anymore. It was a waste of tears.

Spencer Reid was an asshole, that was all.

All there was left to do was to forget about him. Maybe (Y/N) could text Benjamin, tell him she was already back in town, though she really didn't want to. (Y/N) wanted that night for herself, ask for pizza, watch a movie, do nothing. Maybe take a long bath. She could deal with reality in the morning. But right now, she wanted that night for herself.

Of course, she wasn't going to get it. The knocking on her door ruined her plans before she could actually ask for her pizza.

Spencer Reid was holding his breath at the other side of the door and making his best effort not to faint. That's how nervous he was. (Y/N) looked at him in shock, and for a few seconds, she forgot how mad she was with him because the way he was looking at her was heart-melting.

- "I'm sorry,"- Spencer whispered and gave her a gigantic bunch of flowers- "(Y/N), I am so sorry I was an asshole with you."

- "I don't want your flowers."- she refused to take them and took a step back into her apartment. But Spencer followed her.

- "(Y/N), I..."

- "No, you hurt me. You insulted me. You humiliated me and..."

- "And I love you"- Spencer confessed- "I love you, and I have been an insensitive asshole with you. I know you won't forgive me, but I had to try."

(Y/N) stared at him in shock. She didn't move. She didn't even blink. Spencer stared at her in silence, closing the door behind his back. At least they were now inside her apartment, and she wasn't kicking him out. He thought that was a good sign.

- "What are you talking about, Spencer?"

- "I love you. I am in love with you (Y/N). I have been in love with you for the last three years, and I kept telling myself it was useless to feel this way for you 'cos you would ever even look at me that way. But now that you've got that guy, I've realized worse than losing you for telling you my feelings is losing you over some douchebag for not telling you how I feel."

Spencer was rambling too fast, and (Y/N) was not getting what was going on.

- "So you decided to come here and tell me how you feel so I would forgive you?"- (Y/N) asked him, still mad- "'Cos telling me you love me doesn't make me feel any better, Spencer. If anything, it's making me even madder at you! What the fuck is your problem?!"- (Y/N) turned around and walked to her living room, not really knowing what to do.

- "What?"- Spencer asked, confused, following her around.

- "I've been fucking in love with you for years! and you waited till now to tell me how you feel?"

- "I never thought you'd like me!"

- "I don't like you! I fucking love you, Spencer!"

- "I love you too (Y/N)!"

There was a deep silence in the room. (Y/N) and Spencer stared at each other, neither of them knowing what to do. They were in love. Literally, madly in love.

- "I love you, (Y/N)"- Spencer repeated and took a step closer to her.

- "I know, I heard you"- she whispered, confused. She was so upset and so happy at the same time. She had no idea what she was doing.

Reid didn't know what to do either, how to act, or how to fix things. The only thing he could think of doing was simple: to kiss her. Reid took another step closer to her, and she didn't move away. So he wrapped an arm around her waist and held her tight.

- "I love you, (Y/N)"- he repeated for the third time and kissed her with such passion, yet love, (Y/N) 's knees nearly betrayed her. Her head was spinning. Her body was shaking. She was in love, and the man of her dreams was finally kissing her.

Spencer was finally touching her, holding her, kissing her. After three years.

- "You said roses were sad and empty,"- (Y/N) whispered and looked at the bouquet Reid was still holding.

- "I said a lot of things I regret,"- he whispered and kissed her again. This time, less urgently and more sweetly, savoring her little by little- "And these are special flowers."

- "Care to explain?"- (Y/N) murmured and sighed. Spencer nodded and handed her the flowers again, smiling childishly.

- "Purple roses are not nearly as common as red or white roses are. And that's why they indicate a fascination and adoration."- of course, Spencer Reid had a real explanation for picking those flowers.

- "Purple roses are associated with royalty, and they were often given to queens. That's why it's the only flower I could give to you. You are my queen. You have always been, and I've been a stupid blind man not to see it before."

(Y/N) bit her lips and stared at him, not knowing what to say. Spencer sheepishly smiled at her and leaned in to kiss her. But she stopped him.

- "You were an asshole."

- "I know, I'm sorry"- he whispered, honestly sorry- "I'll live the rest of my life making sure you'll forgive me."

- "You won't get tired of me?"

- "Never"- he whispered and leaned over her- "I've been in love with you forever, and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you."

- "Sounds like a lot of time, Spencer."

- "We've waited three years already (Y/N). I'm not wasting any more time."- Spencer Walter Reid held (Y/N) and kissed her. He knew he had wasted three years, but he was willing to do anything and everything he could to make it up for her. All he wanted now was to make her happy every day.

****

Taglist

@all-tings-diego @calm-and-doctor

#spencer reid #criminal minds #mgg #matthew gray gubler #mgg x reader #fluff #angst #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencie reid #babymetaldoll writes

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