#then proceeding to make her do a video pretending to be fine and straight up lying to the world | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ktheist · 4 years

Text

title. “it’s armani, not polyester.” | m

pairings. ceo!jimin x secretary!reader x ex-boyfriend!director!jeongguk

inspired by. conan grey’s heather.

genre. e2f - f2l , office romance, sugar daddy-baby-esque.

words. 10.6k

warnings. explicit content (obviously). mentions of alcohol use.

concept. a retelling of conan grey’s heather in its future days.

story time.

“that’s your ex?” wendy blinks once before proceeding to openly ogle the - as per jennie’s excited text - ‘tall and handsome as hell cutie’ who’s in the middle of speaking to irene who seems to be sporting a larger-than-her-daily smile as her body moves as she nods and laughs and nods again, “i mean - i was expecting some hobo looking guy with spectacles bigger than his head and snot running down his face.”

with a cringe, you shoot her a much needed side eye, “okay first off - ew,” throwing your gaze back at jeongguk, “second off, we only dated for like three months before everyone started sleeping with everybody.”

“like orgies and shits?” this time, it’s her turn to cringe.

“no,” you roll your eyes, “i mean we had our first fight, he slept with my best friend so i slept with his brother who was dating that best friend.”

“oh,” you can almost feel the way her eyes shift from you ex to you as you continue to type on the computer, “guess no more family dinners.”

“it gets better,” you feel a creep up your face as you turn to meet her wide eyed gaze, “me and his brother got into the same college and we decided to stay friends and now his mom knows me as taehyung’s best friend instead of her second child’s ex-girlfriend.”

by the end of it, wendy’s jaw is quite literally on the floor, missing her chance to greet the cutie who’s obviously led here by irene. standing up, you fix the man who seems to have turned into ice, “thank you, irene, i’ll take it from here,” without even missing a beat you give jeongguk a once over, admitting his worth of the nickname he’ll soon forth be known as in the office, “mr. jeon, mr. park is thrilled to meet you.”

jimin didn’t exactly say that - he only yawned when you briefed him about the interview with the possible new tech guy before dozing off in the passenger seat for the rest of the ride.

“you work here?” thawed from his initial shock, jeongguk hurriedly tries to catch up to you when he sees you walking towards the double doors of your boss’ office which is just twenty feet away.

“oh no, i just deliver pizza and happen to know where the ceo’s office is,” and that marks your second eyeroll for the day to which jeongguk’s lips tuck into a blatant sneer.

before he even finished his “someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed”, you’re already knocking twice on the door before strutting into the room where jimin’s face lights up at the sight of you before returning to its unsmiling state when his eyes lands on something over your shoulder.

“mr. park, mr. jeon is here for the interview for the management information systems director position,” you hand him the ipad with jeongguk’s resume opened and ready for inspection.

jeongguk pretends not to see your feigned smile as you pass him but before you manage to exit the room, a voice stops you, “oh, miss ____, do you mind telling irene to make me an extra strong coffee?”

“i can make that, mr. park,” you announce, eyebrows threatening to weave themselves together at the peculiar order.

jimin only chuckles, “miss ____, you and i’s definition of extra strong is vastly different,” but before you can debunk it, he’s already complementing his insult with a praise, “you make the nicest chamomile tea though.”

all while jeon jeongguk stands in the middle of the way yet he’s the last thing you see and probably the last thing jimin notices.

“that’s fair,” with a nod and an amused smile, you leave through the door, knowing full well jeongguk is more than able to distinguish between what’s a facade and what’s not.

and he may very well be the first to call bullshit on your too respectful interactions with your boss.

jeongguk gets the position. naturally, he would - he graduated at the top of his class, became valedictorian, dished out an inspiring speech to which taehyung showed you a video of when you were having your trimonthly meet up a year a ago.

he was a cutie with brains and brawn. his department sucked him in as their new director and colleague in no time. the news of the new tall and handsome as hell cutie who apparently looks better than most people in suit has spread to every other department with wendy and irene liasing between the rumors - considering the fact that they take the ‘first interaction’ privilege.

perks of being part of jimin’s secretary trio, you suppose.

the aforementioned man peeks up at you with a smirk, his leather black salvator snaking up the side of your black mesh pantyhose as you stand in front of him and just until five seconds ago, were briefing him about his meeting with the representative of the manufacturing company for the new chip.

“miss jisoo will be here in two hours and she’ll be discussing the direct materials cost, direct labor cost and manufacturing overhead - that’s where i’ll need you to pay attention because maque it is known for their concrete bargains but exceptional product outcome.” you inform.

“mr. park,” his eyes snap to yours, “my eyes are up here.”

you’re not sure what he sees, but it may or may not have something to do with your unyielding force but flirtatious tone - either way, he lets out a surrendered chuckle.

“i got it - bargain, get the cheapest overall cost but the best production,” he says before guiding your hand that’s under his chin to his mouth, taking your pinky finger between his pearly whites.

“good, call me if you need anything else,” you nod in approval, lips curling into a satisfied smile before summoning your hand back to your side.

the sound of your heels reverberate against the walls as you make your way to the doors but before you manage to step one foot out, he’s calling out for you, “____,” voice unsettlingly calm but his words couldn’t have been any more overbearing, “i expect the same amount of dedication for your... other line of work.”

you would have let that smile tuck into a knowing smirk, would have given him something to look forward to - enough to keep him on his toes for the rest of the day but not enough to be a distraction to his tasks. if not for the sight of a flock of wavy black hair and darkest brown eyes.

“mr. jeon,” your voice may have rose a pitch higher but you’ve managed to school it into a pleasant smile, “how may i help you?”

jeongguk’s eyebrows falter just the slightest bit as a flash of confusion mixed with suspicion crosses his face before he plainly says, “i have something to discuss with the ceo about my work.”

“i’m not sure how things work at your previous company but you need to schedule a meeting with mr. park before anything else but i’ll be glad to navigate you through your scope of duty since mr. park will redirect me to you anyway,” you say simply, noticing how the man’s eyes flit towards the tinted grey glass with three horizontal parallel line down the middle where one can distortedly see jimin’s body turned towards the glass the way it had been when you last saw him.

clearly, he’s watching this unfold through the same see through space.

“it’ll just take a sec - i promise,” jeongguk sounds halfway annoyed with your insistence.

when he takes a step to the side, you take another to the same side, “mr. jeon, this kind of behavior - and on your first day, at that - isn’t something you need on your record and i didn’t make that policy, it was mr. park,” with a the slightest tilt of your head, you let the smile turn into a snide one, “and since you’ve been going around chatting with your new coworkers, you should know a thing or two about how seriously mr. park values one’s descipline during work.”

he shoots you one last pondering look, tongue forming a gentle protrusion in his left cheek like he’d unconsciously do when he’s debating to do the opposite of what he’s told by first agreeing and then finding another way to get what he wants.

“fine,” his shoulder line jolts as he shrugs, hands shoved into his pocket as a strand of hair falls over his forehead, “i need a list of names of the people in my department as well as the last twenty year’s worth of projects held by the company.”

the smile you have on threatens to split into a disgruntled sneer at his ridiculous demand. ten years is the maximum amount of time someone would take to review and understand the workings of the company. fifteen is a stretch because there’s a chance of a change of policy. but a record of the past ten years means you’ll have to do some digging in the storage room since not all files were digitalized and being the new director of the IT department, jeon jeongguk is not oblivious to that very fact.

“i’ll have them on your desk by thursday,” you announce and he reiterates, “i need them by tomorrow.”

and that’s the last straw for you - letting out a sound between a scoff and a snide laughter, you place your hand on your hip, “huh, are you crazy?”

“i mean, as the new director, i need to learn the ropes of the company asap, no? don’t tell me you can’t even do that?” a smile creeps up jeongguk’s face, one that mimics that of a predator who’s caught his prey walking straight into his trap, “and all that talk about discipline.”

the contemptuous chuckle at the end is what boils the blood in your veins and before you know it, you’re spouting out words that you instantaneously regret as soon as they come out.

“of course, i’ll have them on your desk by tomorrow.”

“achoo!”

you curse underneath your breath as you sniffle from the remnants of the sneeze. fourty-three minutes in and you’re already on your nth sneezing fit. index finger flitting across the labels on the box, it takes you three nose scrunching and five boxes down the shelf to find a light blue label with ‘1998′ written next to a ‘september’.

well, that’s the second month of the year 1998 that you’ve managed to locate. the process repeats itself for a good twelve more minutes before you hear the screech of the in-need-of-oiling door and the echo of footsteps against the quiet walls before a tall, black haired figure steps into your periphery.

he’s looking as fresh and crisp as the tie hanging around his neck while you’re pretty sure your updo hair is halfway to giving out to gravity with how you’ve been moving boxes of files around.

“so what are we looking for?” jeongguk begins unnervingly calmly.

but you’re not one to turn down a hand, “anything blue with a label of 1990 up till 2010 - oh and they come in months.”

instead of complaining or at least making his displeasure known, the man simply starts searching the shelves five feet apart from you.

and so it goes, your file searching journey with your ex slash newly appointed coworker. multiple scenarios rushed through your head when you first heard jimin’s excellent review after jeongguk left. the elder man had been typing away on his mac when you’d come to pick up the empty mugs of coffee when he’d passingly say, “you know, there’s something about him that the other candidates lack - where’d you find this guy?”

but you never thought that being stuck in the files room alone would ever come up with this outcome-

“i heard you were the one who recommended me,” that voice of his is as sweet as the first drop of nectar but instead of the boyish tint, it’s tinged with a taste of wine and masculinity.

it’s familiar yet foreign all at once.

“then you must know all three secretaries were required to pick someone to recommend the job for,” with that, you twirl on your heels, a partially full box in your hand as you strut towards the desk where its blue shaded comrades awaits.

“so i’ve been told,” and that’s how you know jeongguk’s initial casual nature was just a facade to conceal his guilt-ridden conscience, “why didn’t you tell me? you didn’t even sign your name in the email - you never mentioned anything -”

“it’s nothing personal, guk,” you cut him off, back on him you pretend to rummage through each individual file of the recent box you’d found, “we needed a new IT director and you fit the criteria but if i gave out any indication that i was the one who reached out to you, your decisions might be affected by that - even just the slightest bit and that’s the last thing i want,” you say simply, “not to mention we pay better - so you get it, right?”

when you twirl around to face him, arms crossed over you chest, ass leaned up against the desk whilst your left knee slants to rest over its right counterpart, you finally meet the man’s curious doe eyes. they’re marred with the signs of life but still as exuberant and beautiful as the first day he stopped you in the hallway. his smiles are more expensive now and he doesn’t shyly look down before talking to you but he’s still the same high school heartthrob you’d had the fattest crush on.

and that’s the thing about high school and the matters of the heart - they’re meant to stay in the past as a fond yet foolish reminder of the things you would do when you were 16.

“i can’t have my guy prancing around the office like an uncivilized raccoon and ji- mr. park is extremely particular about time,” you sigh, throwing your gaze to your blood red soles if only because you can’t hold his gaze longer than this, “trust me, i don’t do things to inconvenience you just because i should have some kind of personal vendetta against you - i don’t.”

“wonder why i have been getting the opposite vibe from you ever since i came,” his shoulder line jolts slightly as he shrugs, eyes rolling but the tiniest smile on his face tells you that it’s all a good natured jest.

“i’m sorry - every time i look at you, it feels like i went back to being that high school girl who lashed out at everyone and everything,” it’s the way his eyes sparkle like stars at your words that drives you to quickly add, “my therapist told me to take a step back every time i feel like saying something mean to you because it’s just my own defense mechanism - i’m still working on it.”

“oh,” is all he says before a blanket of silence wraps around the both of you. it goes on for the longest moment with jeongguk’s unfocused yet heavy gaze on you.

he does that - staring off at something when he’s processing information and knowing his ex-girlfriend who he cheated on now goes to therapy, isn’t something one hears everyday.

“well, let’s get these,” you light tap the box on your left, “to your office - i’ll have the intern pick the rest later.”

“oh-” almost as though snapped from a daze, jeongguk blinks. one. twice. until he’s rushing to your side to get at least two boxes, one piled on top of the other, in each arm while you choose to only carry two.

when he finally finds his words, the first thing he says it -“you don’t have to get me all 20 years of record - 10 is enough and if you walk me through how things work, i’d be really grateful.”

you scoff, a smile on your lips before he mimics yours, “are you like, concerned about me cause i told you i’m seeing therapist -”

“me? concerned? about you?” his body moves along with his eye roll but his tone lacks the sarcasm he’s intending, “not in a thousand years.”

jeongguk is concerned. he tips toes around you like you’re the thinly veiled ice over a lake of emotions. as though one wrong move and you’ll break. and that’s how you know you’re not the only one who’s changed and grown with the years you spent apart.

the jeon jeongguk you knew couldn’t care less if you’d fallen into the darkest depth of your ruins - only because you’d hurt him just as much.

though you haven’t got to the point of having lunch together like wendy and irene and the entire team from his department had, you’ve had moments in between coming back from lunch with jimin and just before lunch hour is up where you’re in the pantry with ice cream in your hand and your phone in the other.

while you’re sure no one would be coming around this time of the day, jeon jeongguk finds away to surprise you with his sudden appearance. strutting in as if he doesn’t notice you, picking up the instant coffee packet only to place one newly stirred coffee cup between you and him as he sips his own that he made with the one he’s apparently gifting you.

“why?” you narrow your eyes at him, suspicion filling every inch of your curled lips.

“oh you know,” his shoulder line shrugs and you realize he’s grown a few inches taller because his shoulder fully past your head, “cause i heard you like your coffees with cream too.”

“how do i know it’s not poisoned?” still dubious, you keep your eyes on him like a hawk - nothing can get past you, not even a nervous gulp.

but instead, he throws his head back, sighing, “___, you literally saw me make them.”

“i don’t know, you’re acting kinda sus, guk,” you insist, phone screen long dead as you take one last bite of the ice cream before tossing the stick into the trashcan.

“sus? me?” his free hand comes flying up to his chest as he looks at you in disbelief.

“give me yours,” you finally announce, hand struck out with your palm facing upwards.

“whatever, idiot,” he shakes his head still, despite failing to hide the tiniest smile that begins to tuck on the corners of his lips before placing the cup he’s been holding on your awaiting hand.

“yay,” you grin, delighted before taking one long sip and breathing out in satisfaction, “i live another day.”

and so it goes, the light banters between moments in time. luckily for you, jeongguk is all round charmer that makes anyone and everyone - men, women and non-bonarys alike - who’s talking to him smile from ear to ear from something he says. possibly a compliment, possibly an agreement to what the other party was saying.

nobody suspected that either of you knew each other prior to this and that’s one less office rumor to look out for. you offer to help jeongguk settle in, murmuring names of the people who greets him so that he’d greet back with their informed name, seeing their faces light up a bit more at the realization that their new boss’s recognition.

“aren’t you with park 24/7? how do you know everyone in this company?” he asks one fine morning after you both got to his desk.

“i’d say it’s talent but i basically had to memorize them overnight right after i joined,” you shrug, “it wasn’t easy but you realize the difference it makes in everyone’s performance when they think their boss knows who they are.”

“so that’s the kind of person park is,” jeongguk nods whilst clicking on the ‘transfer files’ option on the screen of his computer.

“mr. park isn’t like the devil boss from hell - he’s just really self-disciplined,” you correct.

“if he was then why did he make you memorize the names of his employees?” he shoots you a look, one that says ‘you know i’m right’ to which you only roll your eyes.

“the same reason why he needs three secretaries to do his bidding - he’s too busy,” you shoot him a ‘no, you’re not’ look before sticking out your hand after the files are finish being transferred.

“how come i only get one?” his eyebrows knit together in a mixture of dissatisfaction and confusion as he places the usb drive into your hand, not quite showing any signs to take his own hand off just yet.

“maybe ‘cause you’re not that important?” you shoot him a similar ‘you know i’m right’ kind of manner and before he can even say anything, you’re curling your hand over the drive before twirling on your heels.

“ouch, you know that kinda hurts,” a voice comes up behind you and almost like a tidal wave, your apology comes in a second too soon, “really? sorry, i went too far-”

before you can even finish your words, you’re left rooted in your spot. a few feet away from the glass encased room where most of the executives and their secretaries are seen stepping in.

it’s the chuckle that reverberates against your eardrums that washes away your initial guilt like sand on shore, “you’re so-” jeongguk pauses, staring at you with eyes you can’t quite decipher and a flash of emotion you have never seen him make, “you’re so soft, you know that?”

“that wasn’t funny, jeongguk,” you fix him a hard stare, arms crossing over your chest.

“sorry - what i meant is,” and that’s the thing about the two of you - ever since you’d admitted your faults, jeongguk has followed your lead to apologize first. pride seems to be the last thing standing between the two of you at the moment - and it’s times like these, where you’re willing to listen and he’s willing to explain, that you think you might just escape that dark dwelling you call your past.

“miss ___,” a familiar voice drums in your ears, a hand on your lower back pulling your attention from the man in front of you to the attractive devil that’s on your side. the infernal spark in those dark eyes of his disappears as soon as he turns to - “jeongguk, i take it miss ____ has been a great help with the presentation you’re about to show us?”

“yes,” the aforementioned man nods, a look of unadulterated confidence making its way to his face as it replaced the lingering stare where jimin’s arm disappeared behind you, “i couldn’t have finished it this fast without ___.”

at jeongguk’s words, jimin lets a smile slip onto his strong features, making him look less like the unapproachable man he’s known for, “i’m looking forward to it.”

it’s only after jeongguk is walking a few steps ahead towards the open doors of the meeting room and jimin’s hand has long left your body, does the man murmur under his breath, “i’ve received applications for jeongguk’s secretary position, do you mind looking through them for me? though... i left them at my place - if you could come up with me to pick them later after work, it’d be great.”

“really?” you quickly say, before realizing it’d come off too excited for a request of overtime so you clear your throat, looking around the vicinity to see if anyone noticed, “i mean, yes, i can do that - i can drop by for a few minutes.”

“perfect,” his eyes disappears into crescents as the corners of his lips tuck higher before you part ways - him taking the seat at the end of the oval table while you head over to the computers connected to the projector, shoving the drive you’ve had trapped in your hand into its port.

“i’ve heard some things,” jimin’s honey voice is barely the subject of your conscience as you watch his lithe fingers working around the buckle of his belt until one end hangs loose before he pulls on the other, the sound of leather against fabric cutting the air like knife.

after jeongguk’s presentation which was met with praises and positive responses by the board, jimin had easily approved of the proposed updates on the - as the first would call it - a tad bit out dated data base. when the wendy, irene and the rest of his team was about to head out for dinner to celebrate their well earned success, you’d belatedly told them that you couldn’t make it because you had to drive jimin home.

seeing as it was a norm for the head secretary to also take on the role of the ceo’s chauffer, nobody questioned it.

nobody but the latest addition to the company.

jeongguk looked like he wanted to say something, stared at you a little longer as you fixed him and the rest of your leaving coworkers a ‘have fun, guys!’ kind of wave. but you suppose that could wait.

“i didn’t think you’d be one to pay attention to rumors,” you manage to say, swallowing heavily as you tear your gaze from jimin’s apt hands that are looping the belt into its buckle.

“this one’s a little bit interesting,” the chuckle he lets out is sinfully innocent compared to the way he slips the looped belt through your head and pulls on it, forcing the leather material to envelop your neck like a collar, “something about you and jeon having a special relationship.”

“that’s-” the words gets stuck in your throat when your heart leaps up at the slightest tuck on your neck, almost as if he’s saying to ‘choose your words carefully, dove.’

“it’s a matter of the distant past,” you say, sending a grateful prayer to the gods for allowing your voice to sound unbothered.

“didn’t seem like what the rumors are saying,” his breath fans your face as he whispers against your ear - you have to clench your fists together to stop the shivers from wracking through your body, “but that’s alright - at the end of the day, it’s my name you’re screaming.”

a moan escapes your mouth when a pair of plump lips press against yours. sparks in your veins and passion in your heart. before you know it, you’re blindly grasping onto the zipper of of jimin’s trousers, salivating at the thought of a part of him you know too well.

“please, daddy, let me suck your dick,” you plea, eyebrows knitting together with a sort of yearning and frustration from how achingly patient the striking blonde man in front of you is.

if it were up to him, you’d be soaking up the carpeted floor with your arousal throughout the night and he’d still manage to edge you on until you’re begging to come.

but that’s the thing, either way, you’re going to be begging for him. and you’d learned earlier on that you gain less from holding onto your pride than holding onto jimin’s dick.

with your mouth, that is.

it’s the morning after that - that you curse yourself for not putting any restraints to your carnal desires. in your defense though, begging and pleading jimin to push you to your limits seemed like an irresistible option at the time. that is, until you’re digging out what clothes you have in the drawer in your allocated room only to find most of them catering to the neck-to-just-above-the-cleavage-reveal kind of look.

so you opt for scarves - the bruises aren’t bad but the first days are always the hardest. and jimin notices the way you’re craning your neck from side to side as you keep your eyes trained on the red light that’s about to turn green anytime soon.

“does it hurt?” the saccharine sweet voice drips with honeyed concern whilst his hand goes to massage the back of your neck.

you hum in appreciation, “that feels good.”

“maybe i should’ve been gentler,” the tinge of remorse in his voice doesn’t go past you.

“that’s not even where it hurts most,” you giggle, feeling the familiar tingle in between your legs but you manage to push it to the back of your mind as you say, “but you know i like it when you’re rough.”

jimin only laughs, head shaking at your blatant confession. and so the mini massage session continues until the car starts rolling into motion. you go on with your morning routine of reminding him of the list of things he’ll have to do and people to meet for the day.

it’s only after you’ve parked the car and turning off the ignition that your phone dings with a notification of a ‘you received 50, 000 dollars from park jimin’.

squealing, you hop out of the car, heels click clacking against the concrete as you mini run towards the blond who’d slipped out of the car a second earlier.

“thank you, daddy!” you grin, hands wrapping around his arm as he chuckles softly, eyes disappearing into crescent moons.

“i booked you a session at lotus nirvana for the weekend,” he says a minute later as you stand in front of the elevator.

“oh my god,” you gasp, jaw hitting the floor, “the lotus? really?”

“and you can bring a plus one,” he boops your nose with his index finger, making you scrunch it because of the ticklish feeling it leaves.

“you’re the best!” you stand on your tip toes, placing a kiss on his cheekbone just before the elevator stops one level below the ceo and chairman’s parking level, revealing none other than jeongguk in a dashing cobalt blue louis vouitton suit.

you’ve managed to detach yourself from the now-unsmiling ceo who shoots the newcomer a brief smile as a greeting when jeongguk takes longer to look between you and his boss before finally stepping in.

“morning,” you greet with a wave, hoping to brush off the elephant in the room.

the man echoes back your words but nothing else - at least until you reach the 19th floor where jimin turns to you, hands in his pocket, “miss ___ i need to discuss something with you in my office,” just before you’re about to point out the sunken eyes in the younger man’s appearance.

“yes, mr. park,” you say in a heartbeat, before mouthing a ‘catch you later’ to the brunette.

in the next few days, you’ve opt for a variety of scarves to match your outfit. but more importantly, to hide the darkening bruises around your neck as you style your hair to hide what the scarves can’t.

it’s times like these that you keep your distance from people, choosing to stay in front of the computer unless jimin calls for you. whether to ask for if you’re up for having lunch with him, to inquire about the meeting he has or simply to just say “i miss your chamomile tea.”

at that, you can’t help but let the giggle break through your iron wall of a facade, “that’s what you called me for?”

the man’s eyes flit to the right for the briefest second, as though in search for a better answer which he finds none of before meeting your own, “yep, that’s what i called you for.”

“you’re so cute, daddy,” you gush, before placing you ipad down on the desk, hands coming up to frame around jimin’s cheeks as they turn round from the smile that slips onto his face, “i’ll make some for you tonight!” but then your shoulder line falls, eyebrows coming together, “wait - i have dinner with jeongguk tonight.”

“you mean jeon?” he raises an amused eyebrow to which you nod, hands falling away from his cheeks.

“i’ve been avoiding him these past few days and i think he’s getting a little suspicious about us spending so much time together - he thinks you’re... forcing me to do things,” you sigh - just this morning, the black haired cutie caught you in the middle of your way to your desk, pulling you to the side with a set of concerned eyebrows knitted together, “are you okay?”

you took a moment, eyes roaming around the vicinity as though it’d help spot the reason to this abrupt intervention before looking back at him, smiling cluelessly “...yeah, i’m fine.”

he let go of your arm to push his soft tresses which seemed to be missing its usual slick gelled look today, “the ladies have been saying park tends to work you to the bones every few times a month - like right now, and that’s a normal thing here?”

and because it wasn’t the kind of question you got asked often - people just accepted and were even glad that it wasn’t them that jimin was calling to his office every hour throughout the day, you had to take a moment to ponder on your answer “...yeah, it’s normal.”

“and you don’t care?” jeongguk’s blinked, mortified.

“i mean, that’s my livelihood right there so...” and you shrugged.

“i don’t know, i don’t like him,” his shoulder line tensed as he turned his body towards the wall sized window, eyes casted towards the neighboring skyscrapers.

“why?” was all you said - you’d understand intimidating. strict. unapproachable to describe the words jimin is, but no one’s ever confessed to outright disliking the man. but then again, you are the closest person to jimin in the company, no employee would risk getting fired because they blurted out their dissatisfaction towards their ceo to his head secretary.

“there’s just something about him that rubs me the wrong way,” instead of shrugging like what 17-year old jeongguk would have done, this older version of him didn’t even stutter.

you suppose one’s confidence and sense of reasoning - even though there wasn’t any particular reason for him to dislike jimin-

“...something about a ceo calling his head secretary ‘miss’ while he casually address everyone else by their name but never really talk to anyone beyond business matters while nobody’s has a single bad thing to say about him,” when jeongguk’s obsidian eyes fell on you, it was as though the background faded and you found yourself trapped in a glass cage - unable to run away from the truth he seemed to possess, “especially the person he’s overworking the most.”

“well,” there’s this habit that you do - laughing in the face of crisis and this was damn well a crisis because, “if you feel that way then you feel that way.”

“is there something you want to tell me?” he pressed on, speaking under his breath, “if you need help, you can always come to me.”

and that was when the laughter broke into a fit and you’re holding your stomach and his shoulder with your other hand, “jeongguk - i’m fine, really,” there was a tremble in his eyes as self doubt crept up his conscience, which meant whatever you were doing was working, “listen, how bout we go for dinner tonight with wendy and irene? i’m late but i wanna hear how your first staff dinner went.”

you managed to escape jeongguk right after his ‘...yeah, sure’ before mrs. yoo came up to you to ask about the arrangements of the seating for the upcoming corporate dinner. it’s in five months but preparations must be made in advance.

“if he’s starting to notice that means i’m not the only whose got his eyes on you,” the sweet honeyed voice pulls you out of your memories, almond shaped eyes staring at you with a sort of emotion you can’t pinpoint.

and for some reason, you felt the need to clarify where you stand and where jeongguk stands, “we were kids when we started dating - we know better now that both of us clash like two magnets on the opposite poles if we go beyond what friends are.”

“you know i have the utmost respect for you,” butterflies set flight in your stomach when jimin guides your right hand to his lips.

the place you end up going to is called han chu where it’s most famous for its variety of chicken-based cuisine which happens to be irene’s boyfriend’s family’s long standing business. it’d been packed with people, mostly those who’d got off work like yourselves but apparently, they have a different room for adhoc visitors who popped up out of nowhere.

“irene’s taking a long time at the washroom,” wendy announces, a small, jealous pout on her lips as she sticks her chopsticks into the rice bowl before you and jeongguk exchange a knowing look with each other.

since her boyfriend works here, you’re pretty sure that everyone in the room knows irene, in fact, did not go to the washroom. and wendy isn’t too secretive about her want for a man she can call her own to which, two bottles of soju later, she slams her glass against the table and confesses, “i’m so lonely, i want a boyfriend!”

by then, irene’s already back and chiding the younger woman about how she needs to stop drinking so much because apparently, at jeongguk’s congratutional dinner, she was that coworker that drank herself silly and might or might have not blurted out something about jeongguk’s exceptional proportions in front of the entire IT department.

“___! you’re single, right?” the way jeongguk’s hand seems to be take longer to pick up one of those spicy-sweet chicken even though he was gobbling them up like there was no tomorrow just five seconds ago, doesn’t go unnoticed by you, “let’s go to a mixer! i’ll text my friend to include our names for one this weekend.”

this time, the way jeongguk’s visibly tensed shoulder line is no coincidence.

“i’m good, thanks,” you chuckle, patting the woman’s shoulder.

irene on the other hand, looks increasingly worried about her fellow coworker as time passes. it’s when wendy starts to gulp down the soju straight from the bottle that you step in, swiping it out of her hands and placing it back down on the table.

“alright, that’s enough for tonight, let’s get you home” at that, you shoot irene a signal with your eyes, counting a short ‘1,2,3′ before you both hoist her up to her feet, directing her arm over your shoulder while irene does the same with the other one.

“i’ll get the car - you ladies wait at the front of the restaurant ” jeongguk announces, just as you step out of the room.

“thanks, guk,” you fix him an appreciative smile, grateful for not having to drag the half-conscious woman’s body all the way to the parking lot.

“you know, he’s been staring at you the whole night,” a voice giggles - and seeing how wendy can barely even open her eyes, that could only mean that it’s the only other woman that’s holding her up that also decided to let out such absurd statement.

“that’s cause i was sitting next to wendy - who by the way, isn’t exactly a quiet drinker,” you roll your eyes, before a separately realization hits you- “you didn’t drink.”

“well, i can’t really at the moment,” the brunette’s voice takes a gentler turn as you watch her free hand clasp her stomach.

“oh my god,” jaws on the ground, you’re not sure if you’re even blinking, “you’re pregnant? how long far along are you?”

“a month, me and jae were discussing how we’re gonna tell our families,” she meets your wide eyed gaze half-heartedly, “and if i’m going to continue working after i give birth.”

“either way i’m so happy for you,” you reach out your free hand that’s not wrapped around wendy’s waist to which the elder woman accepts, squeezing your hand just hard enough for you to feel her fears and excitement and overflowing joy flow through you, “you and jaebum are gonna be the best parents.”

“i never really said it but you helped me a lot when i just started,” the tears in her eyes makes them look like sparkling stars in the midnight sky, “and you’ve always been so supportive - seriously, ___, thank you.”

“stop,” you squeak in between holding your breath and holding back your tears, “i’m gonna cry.”

“if you cry, i’ll cry,” irene is already pulling her hand away and fanning her face, glimmering eyes turned to the sky.

it’s a moment later that a car rolls to a stop in front of the two of you. the window rolling down, revealing an extremely concerned jeongguk, “what happened?”

the “it’s a girl thing” comes a few moments later, particularly after you slipped into the passenger’s seat next to him while irene sits at the back with wendy’s head in her lap.

by the time you reach wendy’s apartment building, irene announces that she’s staying over at the first. if only to look after the drunken woman and make sure she’s okay.

“are you sure?” you ask to which she nods, murmuring something about how wendy couldn’t survive without her hungover soup if she didn’t stay and make it.

wendy manages to sober up and walk with irene holding her hand. and with the way she’s slow-waving at you, you take it as your cue to leave too.

“call me if you need anything, okay?” is the last thing you say before the two of them step through the clear glass door.

the rest of the ride is filled with silence, save for the faint sound of low volumed music in the background.

that is, until one of you decides to break it with a kind of heartwarming concern you thought already left his mind, “so are you okay?” he peeks at you from the corner of his eyes, as if to check if the tears were still there, “you were crying just now.”

you can’t help but laugh, “don’t worry - they were tears of joy.”

“oh?” only then does he allow the smile to tuck on the corner of his lips, “what about?”

“i don’t know if i can say it,” you feel your own lips curling, “not my story to tell.”

“okay,” he nods, “as long as you’re okay.”

and so the silence returns but this time, it’s no where suffocating or makes you want to hop out of a moving car just to get away from the man you thought you could never stand to be alone with five months ago.

at first, you told yourself that it was for the good of the company - that you didn’t need to be friends, civility was enough. but then you had that talk in the storage room - both equally tensed but both grown out of their youthful impatience into someone who was willing to listen and learn.

and you realized that you work well together - too well, in fact, that jeongguk’s own secretary would come to you even after four months of working with him, just to ask you if he’d prefer his coffees black or with cream.

but you suppose it was because this was her first job after graduating - you were used to taking notes of the littlest of things jeongguk did because that was what worked best for jimin. that, minus the already known facts about jeon jeongguk that you’d gathered during your two years of knowing him and three months of dating him.

and it’s almost as though the plants and the stars align, as the car comes to a stop in front of your apartment building and as he pulls the brake before turning his upper half towards you, “i had a great time tonight.”

“me too, guk, and thanks for driving irene, wendy and me home - you’ve become quite the gentleman,” you chuckle to which the corners of his lips upturns, while his eyes casts itself down to his hands before they meet yours again.

“it was the right thing to do,” but then you can’t escape his eyes - those obsidian eyes that seem to reach through the windows of your soul effortlessly.

“well,” the smile may have been forced but it’s still comes from the heart, “i better go in.”

“yeah - yeah you should,” he nods and you thought you’re just imagining things - irene’s initial observation might or might not have gotten to you.

but just as you’re about to open the door, hand on the handle, jeongguk speaks again, “i was hoping,” at that, you turn to him, “you and me,” you can only hope he can’t hear the sound of your pumping heart, “we could try again, you know?”

you’d like to believe that you’ve gone past that part of your life where you hurt and you hurt others back - the ones that tried to help you, pull you out of that darkened cocoon that you grew so accustomed to.

like to believe that it took a bit more nudging for you to break through the cocoon and that was okay - everyone needed a little bit of help at some point of their life. yours happened to be when you were sixteen hitting seventeen. and even now, you still need help to fly - to let your wings flutter through the wind without breaking and hitting the hard cold ground.

but all of a sudden, you find yourself that same cocoon you thought you abandoned with the ugliest dark brown and maroon walls - the color of the school mascot that seemed to be the symbol of the baseball team’s undefeated victory throughout the year. and all because taehyung’s brother, jeongguk just joined the team.

and you were just one of the many girls who had her eyes on the ace. except your best friend was dating the captain so you sometimes joined her as she watched him practice. until jeongguk noticed you. until he lift you up and broke you down.

“jeongguk,” you say, heart erratically clawing against your chest - obsidian is the color of jeongguk’s eyes as he waited for your answer with bated breath, a rap song is playing in the background, smooth is the material of the handle of the door under your fingertips, marc jacobs is the perfume that faintly wafts from jeongguk’s collar and sweet is the taste of peach soju you had, “i think it’s best to maintain a professional working relationship instead.”

almost as though being pulled from a trance, jeongguk recoils, eyes blinking once before he blurts out a “yeah,” then, a moment later, “yeah, that’s probably the best - sorry for-”

“it’s fine,” you shrug.

“-making everything awkward.” he finally stops.

“i’ll see you on monday,” you say - not so sure if it’s the right thing to say, but jeongguk nods, echoing your words, “yeah - see you monday.”

and with that, you slip out of the car, heels clicking against the ground as you tread towards the door without looking back.

monday turns to tuesday and then tuesday turns to an abundant of weeks. your interactions ceased to a strictly professional, work-based relationship. jeongguk talks to you only when he needs clarifying where his own secretary can’t give him an answer.

you go to him when his secretary is doing a job that requires her to go mia for the day. wendy and irene are well aware of the sudden shift in your dynamics but if you’d gladly told them jeongguk was your ex-boyfriend then you gladly told them what you told jeongguk that night.

your only regret was taking away their own friendship with jeongguk. none of them went out for dinner with him because they were torn between their loyalty to their colleague-turned-friend and the boss whom they were halfway to befriending if not for your complicating the whole thing up.

“but you decided to keep your peace instead of the peace around you and i’m proud of you for choosing yourself first,” jimin had told you as he traced patterns on the dip of your back.

and you might or might not have cried and fell asleep in his arms that night before cancelling your appointment with your therapist with the next day and choosing to have it at the end of the month like you were supposed to. ever since then, your relationship hadn’t been all that physical.

“i think i need time for myself,” you’d told him in the middle of getting stuck in traffic with unmoving cars on either side of you, “but i also still want to see you.”

jimin who’d been staring out of the window mindlessly had turned to you - instead of asking you to repeat what you’d said because he barely caught it, he’d fixed you the warmest of smiles, “it’s been over a year, ___, didn’t it ever occur to you that i wanted more than just sex from this? from us?”

if there was something park jimin was, it was arcane. mysterious - just as you thought you figured out his wants and needs, he makes a 180 and surprised you in ways you never would have seen coming.

“doesn’t it bother you that i’m... this?” there was no word for it - for being yourself but also feeling like someone entirely different all at once.

“no, it doesn’t,” he’d look straight at you as he said it, “i know you probably don’t feel like it right now, but let’s go on a walk by the han river.”

and that was where you talked about your feelings and what you could and couldn’t give while you nibble on the fish shaped bun that was wafting with heavenly scent throughout your walk until you found the stall.

jimin still wanted to pay you for the times you’ll be spending together even though there won’t be sex invloved.

“we still have another few months of the contract, if i don’t pay you then i’d be breaching it,” he’d argued with crescent shaped eyes and the most beautiful smile.

“alright but i’m paying for dinner and lunches from now on,” and there was no changing your mind.

so it goes, you work in the day and leave with jimin for the night. he’d steal away your mac and you’d steal away his but for the most parts, you’d do work in the same room. he’d stop and stepped out only to bring you a cup of hot chocolate and marshmallows and you’d pay back with chamomile tea.

then came the annual dinner which marked five months since that night. he’s decked in a stylish cut black tux with a blue sheen reflected under the light. paired with a glass flute of white wine, he’d probably already won at least three hearts only an hour into the commencement of the dinner while your teeth clamor at the low temperature of the hall.

you’re halfway ready to curse yourself for foregoing your crop blazer in jimin’s car all because you remember been too warm in it - but that was last year and the air conditioning needed fixing - when something warm engulfs your open shoulders.

“jimin,” you blink, recalling the last man talking to a board member just a moment ago before you’d stepped out.

“you should’ve told me you were cold,” he chides and only then do you notice the lack of blazer on his vest-hugged body.

stealing a glance into light poured room, you briefly stand on your tip toes, hands wrapped around the man’s arm as you pull him down to meet your halfway.

“thank you, daddy,” with that, you step away, feeling the rush of heat on your cheeks and the thrill of adrenaline in your veins.

“you’re welcome, dove,” and as soon as he goes back inside, he’s swarmed with other guests who must have wondered where the star of the night went.

and you would have turned to the cityscape if not for the glint of light trapped in glass.

“jeongguk,” your voice is strained, so you clear your throat and put on a smile to cover it up, “how long have you been there?”

a scoff follows your inquiry, “you’re not 16 and a guy giving you his jacket doesn’t mean jack shit, ___.”

at the uncalled for response, you subconsciously tug on the center front of the blazer, “first off, it’s armani, not polyester,” you say, not missing the way his eyes twitching at the comparison - he used to lend you his jackets and sweaters back when you were dating, “and whatever i do with my personal life is none of your business - i don’t have to explain myself to you.”

another scoff hits the air as he steps out of the shadow and into the sliver of light that pours from the hall and onto the veranda, “so all that talk about maintaining a professional relationship were just excuses? because you couldn’t get over the past?”

“the p -” you almost choke on your words, “the past when you cheated on me with my best friend all because i said taehyung was in the right for getting mad at you over you ruining his only chance to get into one of the best theater school in the world?”

“it’s cause of you!” the fact that his voice rose doesn’t go unnoticed even to him as he looks around and only after making sure that nobody was listening, does he continue is a hushed but harsh tone, “i slept with heather because you pushed me to her. if i wanted someone to point out the many list of things i did ‘wrong’ i could’ve just went to my parents.”

you sigh, “that’s the problem, guk-”

“don’t call me that, you don’t get to call me that,” he shoot backs.

“jeongguk,” you rephrase, fingers fiddling with each other until you’ve hit the ten-second mark, “what we had was toxic. we needed so much work on our self-esteem and personal traumas but we turned to each other hoping the other could fix it and all we did was make it worse.”

“please, you were the one who was so insecure about heather - you think i don’t realize how you look at her? how you compare yourself to her when all she did was be your friend?” it takes everything in you not to flinch at his choice of words, “what personal trauma,” he laughs dryly.

“that’s what i’ve been working on but i’m not the only one flawed -your parents,” you say, choosing to ignore the first part of his retort, “them constantly paying more attention to your brother just because he was older and achieved a little bit more than you did. and everyone else who compared you to taehyung’s ‘legacy’. so you turn to the only girl who noticed you,” there’s a flash in his eyes, one that burns bright with anger - just like it did all those years ago.

but you pretend not to notice, “and i was so caught up with the idea of a boyfriend of my own - a guy that didn’t choose heather over me that i did everything i could to keep you. i was toxic to you because i agreed with everything you said, i put down others while i lifted you up but as soon as i tried to fix what i’d done,” you heave out a sigh, “one push - that’s all it takes for you to fall right out my arms and if that wasn’t enough i hurt you by sleeping with taehyung.”

the last thing you see is the boy the with maroon and brown jacket, staring right at you with eyes prickling with tears and face flushed pink but no words come out from his clamped mouth.

so you turn you back on him like you did five years ago. you turned your back on jeongguk and you don’t look back.

you find jimin somewhere amidst the crowd, conversing with a guest from your rival company.

“mr. park,” his eyes focus on your tight-lipped smile as soon as he sees it, you don’t even have to say another word when he excuses himself and you, not even sparing a glance at the guest before his hand finds itself on your waist, guiding you through the room and into the empty hallway since all the guests have arrived and jimin was supposed to deliver the opening speech before you took him away from it.

you barely remember the ride to his place and how he’d sat you down on his bed, kneeling right in front of you with eyes overflowing with concern.

smooth is jimin’s skin under your fingder pads when you touch his face. plump is his lips that you kiss and sweet is the taste of his mouth from the red wine you’d seen him down at the beginning of the event. the woody scent of bleu de chanel that you got him for his birthday last year is what fills your senses.

but they’re gone too soon.

“are you sure?” jimin’s eyes bore into yours, searching for something - something you can’t pinpoint.

“jimin, please, i-” and that’s all it takes for him to press his lips harder to yours, one hand groping your breast while the other pushes the weight of the jacket off your shoulders.

the room is silent.

save for the tapping sound of your fingers across the keyboard. that is, until another pair of hands capture them and brings them across your chest in a hug whilst you giggle at the ticklish sensation of deep violet strands brushing against your cheek, “let’s have dinner together tonight.”

at that, your mouth clamps shut, body recoiling to the side to meet a pair of almond eyes, “don’t you have dinner with chairman of samsung tonight?”

from the way jimin’s lips purse together into a pout, it seems like you hit the nail right on its head, “you quit being my secretary - you should let me lie to you and say i’m free so we can have some ‘us’ time.”

“nope,” you shake your head, breaking free from the man’s grasp before looking at him pointedly, “you’re not going to skip a meal with one of the most influential person in the world.”

“how’s the website going?” he attempts to change the topic, eyes focusing on the sequence of letters and numbers on the screen of your mac as if he understood what the codes say.

yet you humor him, “it’s going okay, though i can’t seem to figure out how to configure the servers.”

it’s been six months since you’ve quit the job. three since you permanently moved in with jimin and one since you’ve got the paperworks done to open up your own joined business with irene. she decided to follow your footsteps to quit even though wendy was basically clinging onto her legs when she came over to pick up her belongings with a growing belly and a sort of radiance on her face.

naturally, the position for co-secretary was opened and applications were flooding in, so much so wendy had to beg you to meet with her somewhere just to review them together.

“i don’t know how to read people,” she lamented, “i do the technical stuff and you do the mind games - by the way,” something flashed in her eyes as her voice lowered into a whisper, “how did you to it?”

she meant, the explosive and tea-worthy news of how you and jimin came to be.

nobody knew about you and him until much much later. when you were free to go out to dinners and social events together with your hand on his arm and him strutting in with a never-before-seen smile. more jaws dropped that afternoon than the money raised for the event.

jeongguk is still the director of the IT department - you left to keep your peace but you’d also hope to keep his. because that’s the thing about past loves and open wounds. they hurt and they bleed with just the right words as knives but it’s how you choose to treat them that heals you.

and though your way of healing is by tearing a piece of yourself over and over again until you grow a new, steeler part that doesn’t mean you loathe the parts you’ve chosen to cut off.

as such, you don’t hate jeongguk - you still want him to live life to his fullest potential. you still want him to thrive like a wilting flower after a rainstorm.

you just didn’t want to - can’t be part of that life.

“my father used to say, ‘if you find yourself in a dry spell of ideas’, take a break,” jimin’s voice is laced with a sort of playfulness as his eyes disappear behind crescent moons, “particularly in mauritius.”

“you did not book a plane to one of the most beautiful islands in world,” you can feel your cheeks hurting from the growing smile that creeps up your face, “did you?”

“our flight scheduled to leave at 2 in the afternoon tomorrow,” he sweeps you up into his arms like you weight nothing at all.

“jimin!” a yelp escapes your lips in between him twirling around and the background moving too fast whilst your arms find their way to his shoulder, “you know i can’t hide a whole ass romantic getaway from my mother! what am i going to tell her when her unemployed, supposedly single daughter starts missing our daily calls because i was too busy vacaying?”

“a month,” jimin adds, head bopping against yours - you’re not quite sure when he stopped twirling, “we’re staying there for a whole month.”

“oh my god,” at first, excitement flashes across your face, then worry follows a second later, “what about your schedule? it’s gonna get pushed back - the phone calls wendy’ll have to make!”

“lisa’s in charge of the phone calls,” he means the new addition to his line of secretaries.

“doesn’t make it okay to give her all the work!” you say, not quite as passionate about someone you’ve never met as he gently lowers you, arms still banded around your waist whilst your foreheads touch.

“after we come back, i’ll make arrangements so your parents could come here - so i could meet them,” he steals a kiss from your half-open mouth.

“you’re kidding, you’re gonna meet my parents?” you echo, halfway into believing that you’re hearing things if not for the way his recently dyed hair bounces as he nods.

“i need their blessings first, don’t i?” he says, chuckling.

“after banging their daughter into the bed every single night, you’re gonna need a whole lot of those,” you pat his hair, in a ‘good luck’ kind of manner - your father isn’t the most welcoming and your mother won’t be as pleased to hear the out-of-the-ordinary ways you fell in love.

a bout of chuckles later, he’s swiping you up in his arms again as he carries you towards the familiar hallway where your shared bedroom lies while you wrap your arms around his shoulders.

“but daddy, it’s still morning,” you giggle.

“didn’t stop you from begging for my dick yesterday, did it?” the corner of his lips curve into a smirk.

note. story time (a short post where i talk about the background of the fic eg. why i decided to write it, the overall message of the fic etc.) is already up (queued along w the fic)!

i’m aware that armani is a brand and polyester is a clothing material so it technically can’t be compared together but in a deeper sense, armani’s material is more comfortable than polyester so it works (pls make it work) ahahahahahaha

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bangtan-gal · 4 years

Text

How to Break a Heart Step 2

Summary: The biggest lie the universe has ever told is that everyone finds love at some point in their lives. Warnings: swearing, angst, fluff, smut, virginity loss, underage drinking Word Count: 5.4k

Taglist: @ainabaina @shineresident @jaehyunluvcult @xjyjyx @cherriesinafruitbowl @snowing-lights @taezeus

The minute you found out Jaehyun had cheated on you, something inside you had shattered. It wasn’t your heart—sure, your heart definitely hurt from that experience—but it had been deeper than the part of you that fell for him. It had your sense of self that broke.

You cut yourself off from everything.

You moved schools, changed your number, and never looked back.

The new school was worse that you’d anticipated. Making friends was hard, and truly trusting them was even harder. You became quieter, more close in on yourself. It was hard to tell if someone was actually trustworthy, if they had intentions to hurt you.

But either way, you survived. You went through your first set of finals and then your second. Next came gowns and caps and tears of joy. Your high school diploma joined your brother’s in the entry hall.

Now you struggled to shove as many clothes into your suitcase as possible. Your family had been planning a trip to the coast since the beginning of your senior year. They didn’t know what happened—you didn’t have the guts to tell them. No one knew: you switched schools with a single explanation.

“You’d think you’re packing for the end of the world.”

You glanced up, rolling your eyes as your brother sauntered into the room. He eyed the mess around your room. Then he smiled at you.

“Ready for three months in paradise?” “I didn’t realize paradise was being stuck with you in a tiny beach house for three months,” you huffed in reply. He barked out a laugh, hitting your back a little too hard. You cringed as he did and then swatted him away afterwards.

“Don’t worry Y/N, I know you’ve missed me.”

With that, he left your room. You watched him go, a sad sigh escaping you as he did. Truthfully, you had missed him. Senior year had been rough and although you sometimes felt like his teasing was too much, you didn’t realize how much you missed it until it was gone. The few holidays he’d come back had been some of the best days in your life.

Another hour passed and you eventually managed to shove all of your necessities into the bag. Your stomach rumbled as you skipped down the stairs. You finished packing, now all you needed to do was wait for tomorrow.

Your brother sat in the living room, laughing loudly with one of his friends. You paused when you realized it was Mark. You hadn’t seen him for the past year. He looked a little more grown up and his voice had finally leveled out. He was slightly taller and his hair wasn’t the shaggy mess it used to be. He glanced up, eyes locking with yours. His smile was side, but something careful lurked in his stare.

“Hi Y/N,” he murmured.

“Hey,” you breathed, gaze darting away from his.

It looked like he knew something.

Why did it look like he knew something? On the off chance he did know something, you found it impossible to stay in the same room. So you smiled tightly and then hurried into the kitchen. Your hunger had dissipated and you leaned against the counter, frowning at the shining tiles at your feet. What if he knew? Did that mean other people know too? Had Jaehyun told people? Why? He’d only look like an ass.

But would other people care?

You closed your eyes and forced the thoughts from your mind. What did it matter if people found out and who cared what they thought of you? You’d been gone the whole year, you’d be gone the whole summer, and then it’s off to college. Those people will forget about you if they haven’t already. Hell, you’ve almost forgotten about yourself.

“You okay dear?” Your mother stepped into the kitchen, balancing several grocery bags on her arms. She smiled at you as she set them down and then blew her hair out of her face. Her eyes studied you and you printed a smile onto your face.

“Mark is here,” you whispered. It wasn’t the entire truth, but it was apart of it. Your mother understood that part. She knew he had a crush on you and she knew how uncomfortable it made you.

“It’s been almost two years since his confession dear,” she sighed, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “He’s probably been over it for a while. I heard he has a serious girlfriend now.”

“Yeah, well, it’s hard to be in the same room as someone who’s told you they love you,” you argued, “especially… when it was so random and unnecessary.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Think about how he feels with your distant attitude towards him.”

You frowned at her.

She raised an eyebrow. “He used to be as much of your best friend as he was your brother’s.”

♡♥♥♥♥♥♥

Seventeen hours later you stood in front of the window, overlooking the glittering ocean that pushed gently against the shore. The sea was a mix of blue and green, small froths of white riding on top of the small waves. The sky was a bright blue, not a single cloud in sight. It was gorgeous and you felt your body relax. Out here, you could escape. Out here, you could pretend that your past wasn’t there and it was amazing; even if it was only for a short amount of time.

“Wanna head down to the beach?” Your brother asked, stepping up beside you. You nodded and then glanced at him.

He was staring at you weirdly.

“What?” You snapped.

“Mark told you that he loved you your Sophomore year?”

You opened your mouth and then found you had no reply or explanation. So your mouth slowly closed, going dry, and you shrugged. He had and you had rejected him. What more was there to say? You actually wished there was more to say, but there didn’t seem to be.

“Yeah…” you frowned at him, “did he tell you?” He nodded, tucking his hands in his pockets. “Is… everything okay between you?”

Mark wasn’t the problem—the problem was your choice in boys. You treated someone sweet, someone who was a safe choice like trash and fell for a boy who your own best friend had warned you against. Jaehyun was your first love, he was apart of you, and when he shattered what was between you, he took that part of you with him. Now you could never get it back.

“I’ve been really rude to Mark for no reason,” you whispered, “everything’s fine between us. I… I just wish I’d been mature enough to deal with it properly.”

He asked no other questions as you stepped away from the window and went to your room to change. You took longer than normal: just staring at your reflection in the mirror, wondering if there was something you’d done wrong. Had you not been exciting enough? Had you been too clingy? Not clingy enough? Your fingernails dug crescents into your palm.

No.

No matter how much you wanted to, you couldn’t blame Jaehyun cheating on yourself.

You pulled a thin sweater over your swimsuit and joined your brother out on the front porch. You bid your parents goodbye and then raced each other down the path, through the sand, and a laugh bubbled up from you when you splashed into the water for the first time. It was cold and refreshing. Until your brother shoved you, sweater and all, face first into the water and ran away cackling.

You came up sputtering and then glared at him where he stood several feet away, laughing and pointing. Water clung to your sweater and dripped down your body as you moved towards him. The two of you stared off and then you smiled sweetly.

“That was mean,” you said, still sporting the sickly sweet smile.

You pulled off your sweater and proceeded to wring it out on him.

The rest of the day went by in the blur, the two of you spending the next several hours just bothering each other, acting as if you were still kids in elementary school. You left behind your worries, chasing each other through the water and splashing each other, earning glares from the other people trying to enjoy their time at the beach. As dinner came around, the two of you left and your whole family went down to a sushi shop and then the night ended late with a movie marathon.

The next morning came too early. Your room had a huge window facing East and so the second the sun peeked over the horizon, you were awakened by a bright light spreading across your room. You laid in bed, head buried underneath your arms as you tried to prepare yourself for the day ahead. You knew your family: vacation was meant to be relaxing, but your family believed in constant, non-stop fun. And sure enough, your mother burst into your room at 7 AM sharp, dragging you out of bed for a sloppily made breakfast. Then it was off to a nearby zoo, where you got attacked by a peacock and your brother got a video, his hysterical laugh in the background as you tried to run away from the creature. Then lunch came and you stopped at a fastfood restaurant and then you were dragged down to the beach, where your father tossed you into the water and pretended like he did nothing.

After an hour, everyone else finally started to lose energy and you were given an excuse to lounge on your towel, reading quietly. But you weren’t given quiet for long.

“Y/N, can you go buy me a smoothie?” You frowned at your brother over your book.

“Why can’t you?” You whined.

“You’re closer to the Snack Shack,” he grumbled. You glanced over your shoulder and saw that several metres away, there was a happily decorated shack.

“But you’re just lying there,” you argued.

“I’ll let you keep the change.”

“Fuck you.”

You snatched the money from his hand and stumbled to your feet, hurrying to the stupid smoothie place. There wasn’t a line, which you were thankful for as you marched straight up to the counter. Then all the anger you had flickered out as you came face to face with a very, like very pretty boy. He smiled nervously at you, fingers twitching in front of the register as he waited for you to say something.

“Hello?” He tilted his head at you. “Miss?”

You blinked.

“Sorry, long day,” you mumbled in excuse, letting your gaze fall down to your own hands, “can I get uh… a blueberry smoothie?” “A blueberry smoothie,” he called over his shoulder and then turned back to you, “anything else?”

You couldn’t meet his stare, so instead you focused your gaze on a stray piece of hair that brushed along the side of his forehead.

“Nope, that’s all.”

You were certain your smile was slightly creepy.

He nodded again and then glanced over his shoulder once more, before leaning against the counter. Because of the action, he drew closer, and he smelled like some fruity candy. He wasn’t looking at you as he bit his lip, eyes roving over the other people wandering the beach. His hair was a mix of dark brown and blonde, carefully gelled up and to the side. His eyes were dark, but bright, lined by deep lashes and smooth skin. Suddenly, he seemed to snap out of a daze, shaking his head, and looking back at you, one corner of his lips poking up in an awkward beam.

“You here on vacation?” He asked.

“Yeah, the whole summer actually,” you mumbled, licking your lips, “graduation gift.”

“Oh dang, I also just graduated!” He said gleefully. You were taken aback by the quick, large smile that pulled at his face and the way his eyes crinkled as he did so. “I’m Sicheng.”

He reached out a hand over the counter and you tentatively shook it.

“Here’s the smoothie,” another boy popped up, placing the cup on the wooden surface. You grasped him, thanking them quietly and started to make your way back to your brother.

“Hey!” You paused, glancing over your shoulder as Sicheng waved at you. “What’s your name?” You tilted your head, smiling.

“Who knows?” You called back. He looked taken aback by that statement and then he laughed, waving to you in farewell. You waved back and then hurried back to your towel, unaware of the Cheshire grin on your face. Your brother frowned at you as you sat down.

“You’re not supposed to be this happy about a smoothie you don’t even get a sip of,” he huffed, snatching the cup from you. You didn’t even react as you rolled onto your back, diving back into your book, the smile never once leaving your face. He stared at you for a few seconds. “Okay then.”

♡♥♥♥♥♥♥

Sicheng was at the Snack Shack every day the rest of that week and so were you. The two of you would teasingly converse as you waited for your smoothie, shake, or whatever your brother asked you to get. Part of you didn’t know what you were doing: you didn’t know if you were flirting or if you were just trying to be happy in the moment; make a new friend. Either way, all you could say was that your smile never left your face the whole time. It truly was paradise—not even your brother’s jabs could tap down the swell in your heart.

Just the same as every other day that week, you walked up to the register, gently smiling at Sicheng and ordering. The two of you talked as you waited for the smoothie to be made. Meeting his eyes was easier now, now that you knew he wasn’t a shark in a pretty boy’s skin.

You stood with your smoothie, preparing to leave, but he stopped you.

“Do you wanna come to a beach party with me?” He asked. He looked nervous, his eyes darting around, unable to meet your stare as he waited for an answer.

“What time?”

He opened his mouth and then frowned. “I actually don’t know.”

You chuckled.

“Just meet me here at six, okay? I’ll hopefully know the details by then,” he murmured, tapping the side of his head and then winking at you. You laughed, shaking your head.

“Big brain energy,” you snorted, winking back at him as you left. “See you at six!” You managed not to skip back to your family.

The rest of the day you were giddy and impatient. Six couldn’t seem to come any quicker and by the time the clock finally started to reach the end of five, you were racing out the door, shouting a goodbye at your parents. Sicheng finished cleaning up the second you arrived and he smiled at you, stepping out of the tiny wooden hut. It was the first time you’d actually seen him outside of his work zone and it was kind of weird. He seemed taller, especially when he stood directly next to you.

“The party doesn’t start till seven, so we have an hour,” he explained, starting to walk along the beach. You followed and then fell into step beside him. “Any ideas?” You smiled, glancing down at your feet.

“As much as I act like I know everything, I barely know anything besides the beach and the sushi restaurant on the other side of the road,” you pointed out. Sicheng smirked at your response and continued to walk down the beach. The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, walking side by side through the sand. At some point, he grew closer to you and your hands kept brushing. You looked at him, studying his face. He wasn’t looking at you, his gaze focused on the horizon as his fingers intertwined with yours. Your heart started to scream and you were certain someone had opened the gate to the zoo because there was a stampede in your stomach.

The sun started to dip below the ocean as you continued down the beach. Pink and orange started to paint itself across the water. Both of you stopped walking to watch as the sun slowly sunk beneath the gently lapping waves. His hand tightened on yours. Sicheng turned to you, head tilted. Your heart started to loudly pound as he slid closer to you, his hand leaving yours and instead wrapping around your waist. He pulled you against him, his face mere inches from yours. You held in your breath, eyes wide as he leaned in closer. The last of the sun’s rays washed over you as his lips connected with yours and your eyes fluttered shut. He tasted salty—almost like the ocean. His mouth moved gently against yours, pushing and pulling at all the right times. He seemed reluctant to pull back, but when he did you were greeted by his dark eyes reflecting the sunset. His lips curled into a smile as the two of you just stared at one another.

“Wow,” he murmured, his breath fanning over your face. “You’re honestly beautiful.”

Your cheeks burned at the compliment. You ducked your head, but right after you did, he pushed your chin up. You met his scorching gaze, certain your face was bright red as your stare off continued. He tilted his head.

“I’m not lying.”

“Well, thanks, I guess,” you chuckled. He smiled, his arm tightened around your waist. “Now, let’s get to that party.”

The walk back down the beach to where the other teens were setting up was tense. Suddenly, you didn’t want to go, You just wanted to find a quiet place with Sicheng and keep to yourselves. But you still let him drag you towards the others, hands clasped together.

“Hey Sicheng!” A boy shouted in greeting, “I didn’t know you were gonna show up.”

Sicheng laughed, high fiving the guy before pulling you forward.

“Figured I may as well. This is Y/N; Y/N, this is Jun,” he said. You smiled at Jun nervously, shaking his hand. The boy’s eyes darted to your joined hands, a frown pulling on his face for a quick second before he covered it up with a smile. Sicheng continued to introduce you to his friends after that. You ignored it as best as you could, but every time you met someone new, you noticed there seemed to be a displeased moment before the look disappeared.

It got later and later and at some point you found yourself sitting next to the fire, clutching a half-full beer can in your hands. Sicheng was nearby, chatting happily with some of his friends. You watched him the whole time, smile widening every time he laughed. He was inhuman—every time he threw his head back in a soft laugh, dimples appearing and eyes creasing, he looked like he belonged in a magazine.

“Do you think she’s like the other girls?”

You glanced over at a pair of girls who were whispering close to you but swiftly turned your attention back to Sicheng.

You couldn’t help but overhear them though.

“Oh god, I hope not. She seems really sweet,” the other muttered.

“He’s got to be out of that phase by now? She broke up with him over a year ago.”

Your stomach started to turn. You felt like you were listening in on something you shouldn’t know about, even though it sounded like they were talking about you. It almost felt as if you overheard your parents talking about what they were going to get you for Christmas. The beer can started to collapse under your tightening grip. You finished the contents and then completely crushed it, tossing it into the trash can.

“Hey Sicheng,” you said, tapping his shoulder, “I think I’m gonna head back now. I’m tired.” His eyes searched your face.

“I’ll walk you back.”

The two of you were silent for the first few minutes before Sicheng loudly cleared his throat. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. What were those girls talking about? Who was “she?” Who were the “others?”

“My girlfriend of a year cheated on me last May.”

You stopped walking, eyes widening.

It sounded like a really familiar situation.

“It hurt so much and I didn’t know how to deal with it, so I started sleeping around with girls. Lots of them: I’m not proud at all. I used them to try to get over it, but it only made it worse,” he sighed, kicking lightly at the sand. “All of my friends are worried that I’m doing the same thing to you.”

It was dark, but you could tell he was looking at you/

“I’m not Y/N. You’re… I don’t even think I could do that to you if I wanted to. You’re just perfect and I truly want to have something with you. Something more than just a fling,” he explained. His hand found yours. It was a warm contrast to your cold fingers. You curled your own fingers around his hand, staring at him.

You squeezed his hand. “Thank you for telling me.”

“I really like you Y/N.”

You smiled.

“I really like you too, Chengie.”

♡♥♥♥♥♥♥

The end of July was nearing. Your parents hadn’t been lying when they said they wanted to stay at the beach the whole summer. But as summer started to come to an end and school approached, it became bittersweet. You and Sicheng had grown extremely close as the weeks had passed.

You leave tomorrow for home.

“Okay, but chicken is actually disgusting,” you argued.

He shook his head with a laugh, throwing a candy wrapper at you.

“Have you ever had dinosaur chicken nuggets? Those things are where it’s at!” He stated. You rolled your eyes, but a smile was blooming on your face. You leaned over the console, kissing him softly. Sicheng smiled against your lips, pulling you closer to him. It didn’t matter how many times you kissed him—you could never get over it. He tasted amazing, he was soft and gentle. He pulled back, eyes dilated as he stared at you. “We’ve been avoiding it.”

You froze.

“What?” He smiled sadly.

“You’re going to go off to college soon,” he mumbled, “I’m staying here… what’s our plan?” You sighed, your hand tightening on his.

“I really want to stay with you. I-could we pull off a long-distance relationship?” You whispered. Sicheng licked his lips.

“I want to try.”

He pulled you against him again in another soft kiss and you smiled against his lips. As the kiss went on, something lit up deep inside you. It wasn’t like anything you’d felt before—it was this deep longing, but it was more than that—it was full of something rich and sweet. Through your time with Jaehyun, you’d never felt it before and never even thought of it, but as Sicheng’s fingers crawled delicately through your hair, it was all you could think about. You pulled back away from him slightly, only for him to desperately chase after your lips.

“Sicheng,” you giggled against his lips. He groaned, not even pulling away from you as his mouth left yours and started to trail along your jawline. Your cheeks grew bright. “C-can I ask you something? Something serious?” He completely pulled back, blinking rapidly as he nodded.

“Are you…” you trailed off, face turning completely red. “A… you know?”

A smirk pulled at his lips.

“No, Y/n, I don’t think I do know,” he chuckled, leaning closer to you.

You frowned.

“Sicheng… I want to—I’m ready.”

It was his turn to be bright red. His eyes widened, brown orbs shining in the soft light. He brushed his hair out of his face, his eyes carefully watching you. Your smile started to waver as his reply took longer and longer. Maybe you were out of your mind. The two of you weren’t technically official; you’d only known each other for a few months. You had to be way ahead of yourself.

“If you’re ready Y/N, I am too,” he replied before you could take back your comment. “I don’t want you to force yourself into anything.” “I’m not—I—”

You started laughing, unable to contain it anymore. He soon joined you, his chuckles sounding like music to your ears.

“Well, I guess I better start planning.” Before he could continue any longer, you crawled over the console, swinging your leg over his lap. His eyebrows raised, mouth parting in a startled expression. You cupped his face in your hands, smiling nervously at him and then you crashed your lips to his. Sicheng was quick to respond, his hands falling to your hips and lips eagerly pressing back against yours. Your hand fumbled along the side of the seat until you found the lever and the seat tumbled to lay flat.

He nipped at your lip, his hands started to crawl up your shirt. You spared a glance out the window to where the sun was quickly dipping below the horizon and then helped him pull your shirt over your head. Sicheng let out a soft exhale of breath before his lips attacked your collarbone. He nipped at the skin and left small bruises along your chest and shoulders.

His fingers were nimble as they slid up your spine, sending shivers dancing along your skin, and then he unclipped your bra. A loud gasp escaped you as he wasted no time wrapping his lips around your nipple. Your fingers tangled in his hair and you pulled him closer against you. Unaware of your own movements, you started to grind down against him. Sicheng disconnected from you, a beautiful whimper falling from his lips at the friction.

“We”—he moaned as you pressed down on his boner with persistence—“we can still stop if you want.”

You shook your head.

“No, I want it,” you whispered, reaching down to peel his shirt off. His chest and stomach were made up of softly defined planes. Sicheng didn’t give you much time to admire him as he started to unbutton your shorts, hands shaking as he struggled to pull them off. You lifted yourself up, helping him and then you started on his shorts. The two of you paused for a few seconds, both huffing for air as you both sat with only one garment between you.

Your eyes flicked over him and then you smirked, carefully grasping his cock. He gasped his back arching into your touch. His eyes fluttered shut and then he loudly slapped the console, groaning.

“C-condoms are in there,” he whined.

You continued to stroke him through his boxers as you opened the console and grabbed one of the packets. You had never felt so much power in your life—seeing him squirm beneath you, even from just the smallest touches. A shaky breath escaped you as you slowly pulled off his boxers and you paused for a second, eyes meeting his.

“I’ll take care of you Y/N, I promise,” he murmured. You took a deep breath,m nodding your head, and then pulled off your panties. Sicheng smiled at you and you smiled back, but then broke eye contact as you rolled the condom on. Your body was vibrating, but you were certain you were ready. You were soaked and Sicheng’s smile reminded you of where you were and who you were with. This was what you wanted.

He gripped your thighs, fingers digging painfully into the flesh as he helped you lower yourself onto him. You froze when just the tip pushed into your entrance, wincing slightly. Sicheng started to rub circles on your skin, whispering compliments to you. You braced your hands against his shoulders and then bit your lip as you slid down until you rested gently against him. A few tears pricked at your eyes at the stretch and you whimpered.

“If it hurts, you don’t have to continue,” he said quietly.

“It’s just a pinch,.”

You let yourself get accustomed to the feeling of him inside you and then you started to rock up and down. It hurt for the first several thrusts and you almost gave up. But as you pushed through, the pain started to subside and you could feel a pure bliss start to rupture through your lower stomach. Sicheng was biting his lips, struggling to hold in his moans.

You rolled your hips and then groaned as his cock hit in just the right spot. You braced your arm on the console, the other against his chest and slowly your movements started to speed up. Sicheng moved his hands from your thighs to your hips and he helped you bounce on him.

“Fuck, Sicheng!” You squeaked as he once again hit your g-spot, but this time harder and it sent pleasure-filled chills throughout your body.

Neither one of you lasted much longer, your whole body starting to shake as your orgasm washed over you and Sicheng finished a few seconds later. The two of you laid together for a few minutes, just basking in the feeling of what had just happened. Of the huge step you just took.

Eventually, you managed to sit up and the two of you struggled into your clothes. In exhaustion, you fell asleep in the passenger’s seat, hand clasped in Sicheng’s.

The next morning, you were woken up by the sun. You groaned, eyes blearily blinking open and you rolled your shoulders. Sicheng sat beside you, looking wide awake. It looked like he’d attempted to comb his hair and his clothes were straightened out. His smile was sad as he watched you slowly wake up.

“Have you been up for a while?” You asked.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, “woke up for the sunrise.”

“Was it pretty?”

He shrugged. “Honestly, it was hard to pay attention because all I could focus on was how pretty you are when you sleep.”

He ran a hand through your hair. You laughed, but it all felt bitter. You had to leave this afternoon. Sicheng started up his car without another word and drove you back to the beach house. He kissed you goodbye, telling you to text him when you got back home. You slid out of the car.

“Oh wait, Y/N! Here, take this.”

You leaned back into the car, accepting a neatly folded paper.

“You can’t read it until your home,” he said with a wink. You laughed.

“Okay, Romeo.”

You packed up, mind racing as you did. You were quiet throughout the car ride, eyes focused on the quickly passing landscape. Finally, you got home and you hurried up the stairs, collapsing onto your bed. You pulled out your phone, grinning.

You: hey, I’m home safe!

He replied right away.

Except it wasn’t him.

We apologize for this I convenience, but the number you are trying to reach is no longer in service. If you believe this is a mistake, please contact us at—

Your heart stopped and your mind went blank. You threw your phone on the floor and searched through your bag. When you found the paper, you stared at if for a few seconds, before opening it.

Hey, y/n… I’m really sorry.

You don’t deserve this, believe me. Don’t blame yourself, this is all me. I thought I could commit to a relationship, but this morning, all I could think about was how I was going to fuck this up someway. Fuck you up. I know nothing will ever make up for this, but I’m sorry. I truly do love you.

Enjoy college and continue on with a smile.

It’s not your fault.

-Sicheng

You stared at the letter, disbelief racing through you. Then you screamed. It came from somewhere deep inside you and it felt like you’d been completely torn in half. You shredded the letter, tears starting to streak down your face. You sobbed and shouted until the paper was just flakes of white and gray scattered across your bed spread.

The door burst open and your brother rushed in.

He froze when he saw you.

“Y/N?”

You sobbed, clutching your stomach.

“There’s no spider, is there?” He asked.

You shook your head.

“No… it’s just me.”

♡♡♥♥♥♥♥

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dxaxt · 3 years

Text

*Cue dramatics*

Ok, here it goes...

4 years ago I was in a mentally (slightly physical relationship). He was a well-liked man despite others knowing of his abusive patterns towards other women. I am willing to admit that this is all my fault.

Initially I added him on Facebook because I thought he was really cute then we transitioned to instagram in which led to him writing me first. We were both in rotting relationships so we weren’t going to make anything official. After a couple of weeks texting & video chatting we met up.

The first red flag was when I would go to his house & two of his friends would randomly come. He told me they were randomly coming & I told him I’ll just leave. He joked & said, “Its not like we’re gonna rape you... Just meet them.” I told him that I wasn’t thinking that but now the thought of it was circulating in my head. Ive been sexually assaulted a few times in my life & the thought of it happening again was terrifying. I stayed an extra 5 minutes anyway (like a true dumbass). The second red flag would be him texting another girl while he was holding me.

The third red flag reared its ugly head the second time we met up. He was close to being drunk, sipping away at the little Hennessy bottle he had. He kept asking me to drink & I kept refusing. We smoked together & then started kissing. He started moving his hands into my shirt & I tried to stop him but he convinced me that it’ll be fine so I gave in. It didn’t last long (thankfully) & he still kept trying to convince me that it was fine. I left shortly afterwards. He would begin to talk to me less & less & after a week of him ignoring me going by I decided to leave him alone. Suddenly he has a change of heart & decides to chase after me. We’d have sex again & he would tell me that he was in love with me. No one has ever been in love with me before & to hear those words made me cry so I forced myself to believe him. We were fine for a few days then he’d go back to completely ignoring me.

I want to say a month passed by & we still weren’t talking. I found myself texting him sometimes & only sometimes id get a reply. He’d say things like, “I love you.” “Im busy at work” “Thinking of you” & I was eating it up like cake; this was beyond a red flag.

The fifth red flag would be when I was hanging out with one of my friends & we saw him with another woman, who happened to be about 10 years our senior (he & I are the same age). I would later learn that he’s attacked her in front of 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 woman before. He acted as if he didn’t know me & we were in each other’s faces as if we were going to fight. He threatened to kill me. I lacked the love in myself to leave him alone then & decided to torment myself for the next 2 1/2 years.

The man had a plethora of other women. A bunch of his exes couldn’t seem to let go of him. He would still see some of them from time to time & I would see him less & less. He would complain about how often he saw me even though we saw each other once or twice every other week. One time he came straight to me right after having sex with another woman. I smelled her residue on him. I would at this point start to see other people in between that time. He would act jealous so naturally I stopped seeing other people. My friends begged me to stop talking to him but I couldn’t at the time. All of my friends had someone or were barely speaking to me which led to a few fallouts but he was always there.

There was a time again where he ignored me for about two months. At this point I had lost my mind; I was giving out his address & phone numbers to random people on dating apps which led to him moving a few times. He randomly decided to show up to my house which led to a slight altercation. He shoved me into the wall twice because I was on the way to help him pack up his clothes so he can get dressed & leave. He was drunk (of course) so I decided to give him a big ass bottle of Vodka to encourage him to leave.

We’d get into another altercation outside. He was playing mind games so I decided to approach him about it in person, waiting in an area I knew he’d be in. He threatened to stab me & took out his switch blade, putting it on his side, the side that was closer to my leg. I took out my taser & put it close to his neck area. Slowly we both drew down our weapons & the rest of the evening he’d cat call to this woman who was flirting with him back. He’d ask me if I want to have sex by the train & I told him no. He proceeded to return text messages back to some person that was texting him paragraphs. I caught a few glimpses of the words; “Please stop doing this to me.” “I love you.” Those words were familiar. I decided to just walk away from him & he followed after me.

At that point I was beginning to ignore him. I was seeing someone else who was also a terrible human being (long story short he recorded us having sex with my consent but without my consent he was posting it on his private snapchat and sending it to his ex along with a few other women he was involved with + finding out he had abused this other woman) & that lasted for about a month. He would start to text me from random numbers, begging to see me & how much he missed me. I decided to see him & things seemed a bit ok between us.

We started fighting again & then I’d learn of him dating a 15/16 year old girl (he & I were 23 at the time) a week after seeing him. I was completely mortified. The girl would start to flirt with me & confide in me about him had hitting her before & how much they were in love. Eventually things would turn sour cause she told me how she slept with his friend & then I told him & it turned into this big whole argument over the phone with all three of them degrading me, calling me racial slurs, the whole nine. I left him alone completely after this in which led to him stalking me.

He would pass by a friend i had at the time’s job a few times, starring at her through the window. Private calls popping in here & there followed by threats of all kinds. At one point his underage girlfriend would text me pretending to be him through these burner numbers. A few months after their relationship ended I would see him about three more times. After the last time I would block his number indefinitely & we wouldn’t speak ever again.

I don’t deserve to have trauma because I know after awhile I was doing it to myself. I let a man like him believe I was “living for his dick” (his exact words). I let this man degrade me along with his friends. I let this man hold my sanity. I gave him more of myself than I even had at the time. Ive lost all the friends I’ve had during that time as well & some of those fallouts were because they were disappointed in me for prolonging the situation & I sincerely don’t blame them. I just hope one day I can forgive myself for letting myself down like that

#personal #tw abuse

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lunnanunna · 4 years

Text

Frozen

Stray Kids Extra Member AU:

Summary: Ollie gets the boys to spend some time together and watch a movie.

A/N: Here’s the Stray Kids post I promised like... a while ago.

P.S. This gif fit this so well, lol.

Requests are open! And feed back is greatly welcomed!

“Why is it so cold in this place?” came a muffled voice from down the hall.

Everyone in the living room looked up, curious at what was going on.

“Noona, you’re gonna fall over,” Jisung said as he emerged from the hall holding some pillows.

“It’s fine. The blankets will break my fall,” Ollie stated as she followed him, or better put, a pile of blankets followed him.

“Uh, what’s going on?” Chan asked as he quickly got up to walk over to the two. Ollie popped her head out as much as she could, balancing the giant pile of blankets and pillows hugged in her arms. She looked at him with a smile.

“Channie! Can you help me, please?” she asked and he quickly grabbed some of the items from her and followed after Jisung who just plopped everything on the floor in front of the couch. Both Ollie and Chan did the same.

“How long have you had that Olaf onesie?” Changbin asked with a laugh from the couch. The others finally looked up from the pile on the floor and looked at her.

“I found it yesterday at the mall,” Ollie stated with a wave of her hand.

“I went shopping with you yesterday though. I didn’t see you buy it,” Felix asked completely confused.

“Oh, yeah. After I finished in Victoria's Secret, you were still in that new video game store, and I saw a bunch of cute onesies in the store next door, so I went in, and immediately saw this one and then I bought it,” Ollie said shrugging nonchalantly, playing with the carrot nose on the hood. Ollie could practically hear the multiple eye rolls around the room, along with some laughing.

“Okay, now that that’s settled. And I am happy to see that you’ve added another onesie to your collection, but why?” Minho asked from the floor, motioning to the mountain of blankets and pillows.

“Don’t look at me. She grabbed me as I walked by her room and forced me to carry all this,” Jisung said, holding his hands up and walking to where Felix sat and joined him. Once he said this, everyone looked at Ollie, who stood with a wide smile, rubbing her hands together.

“She’s like a little monster,” Hyunjin said, leaning away from her.

“Noona? Should we be worried?” Chan asked, standing next to her. She whipped her head so quickly, that her glasses almost flew off. The leader laughed and reached over to fix her glasses for her.

“Thank you,” Ollie said, smiling at Chan, “Now sit.”

Chan chuckled and then sat next to Seungmin and Jeongin.

“Okay, so I’ve been doing some thinking. And I know that things lately have been stressful” Ollie cautiously looked around and saw some smiles disappear. “Comebacks are always tiring for us and we tend to get snappy,” she added.

“So, here’s the plan,” Ollie clapped her hands and gathered everyone’s attention, “For tonight, we’ll do a movie night. Then starting next week, we’ll try to take some time to have a movie night or a game night, or whatever other ideas anyone has. This week I’ll chose a movie, then we’ll work out a schedule for each one of us to take a week and plan things for us to do. We’ve been spending too much time away from each other these last weeks, and I feel like now more than anything, we need to be with each other.”

Everyone nodded liking the idea, and Ollie felt her heart swell at the sight of her boys smiling.

“So, the blankets?” Seungmin asked.

“For maximum comfort!” Ollie cheered. Everyone laughed.

“Noona, can we have hot chocolate too?” Jeongin asked, a smile breaking out.

“Only if you help me make it,” Ollie answered folding her hands as if to beg.

“You know he’ll always say yes to you,” Jisung rolled his eyes.

“Well yeah, that’s cause I like Noona more than you,” Jeongin stuck his tongue out.

“Just help organize all the blankets,” Ollie told Jisung who again rolled his eyes, but then smiled.

While she and the maknae were in the kitchen making hot chocolate, Ollie could hear the boys in the other room arranging all the furniture and blankets.

“This is really nice, Noona,” Jeongin stated looking down at Ollie, putting an arm around her shoulder,

“Yeah? Well, hopefully this will get everyone’s spirits up,” Ollie said, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. They then set out mugs to pour the drinks in.

“Do you guys need any help?” Changbin asked looking at the steaming mugs.

“Yeah, actually. Can you take that tray, Innie take this one, and I’ll grab this one,” Ollie directed and the three of them walked into the living room and placed the trays on the coffee table that was moved to the side.

Ollie took a look around the room and smiled. They boys had moved everything around and placed cushions on the floor, along with some pillows to create the illusion that it was a giant bed that they could all fit on. All the blankets were arranged to add extra fluffiness and more were at the corners for them to use to keep warm. A bunch of stuffed animals were also placed around, making it the most comfy looking “bed” that Ollie has ever seen.

“I love this!” Ollie said and the boys found their seats around the “bed”.

“So, what movie are we watching?” Hyunjin asked.

“Isn’t it obvious,” Minho asked pointing to the Olaf that was now searching through the movies on the shelfs.

“Are we really going to watch Frozen. Again?” Seungmin asked.

Ollie turned to face the boys with said movie in her hand. “Oh, don’t pretend you don’t like it,” Ollie smirked. She then proceeded to place the movie in the dvd player.

Once that was done, Ollie grabbed the remote and walked over to the boys. They had already picked the best seats and now the only ones were the ones way up front where Ollie would have to crane her neck. So she did the only logical thing. She sat in between Chan’s legs, back resting on his chest.

“You comfy?” the leader chuckled. Ollie nodded her head, just as the opening credits came on.

“The hot chocolate!” Ollie all but shouted. Minho quickly handed them out to everyone and then sat back down, cuddling Jisung, who was very content with the set up.

Ollie smiled, happy that her boys were happy.

“Yah, Ollie! You better not sing along,” Hyunjin said looking straight at the tv.

“It’s Disney. It’s illegal not to sing along,” Ollie protested.

Ollie’s Masterlist

#stray kids #stray kids au #stray kids 9th member #stray kids fanfic #stray kids oneshot #stray kids reactions #stray kids imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop reactions #kpop oneshots #bang chan #lee minho #seo changbin #hwang hyunjin #han jisung #lee felix #kim seungmin #yang jeongin

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wiinterrose · 4 years

Photo

( xavier serrano , male , he/him, 23 ) omg ! i was walking yonge street downtown , and you’ll never guess who i saw . 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 ! i just saw a post about them on sixsecrets ! i think it said something like “ 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝟓 𝐀𝐌 : 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ?” . isn’t that wild ? i guess it makes sense through , since they’re apparently 𝐃𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐒 and 𝐂𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 . but i’ve heard they’re also 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂 and 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂 ! i’ll just stick to giving them the benefit of the doubt . i mean , it’s not like i know them personally — they’re a famous 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 / 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐁𝐄𝐑 ! you know , i’ve actually heard rumors that ██████████████████, but they’re just rumors … i think . i dunno . if you happen to run into them , tell them i’m their biggest fan ! ( ollie , they / them , 21 , est )

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

— mikey was born and raised in winnipeg because i think it’s funny when characters are from winnipeg. if you’re from winnipeg i’m so sorry. definitely was born on the coldest day of that year ( so like some point in january )

— but because of those long, cold harsh winters, mikey found himself in a dance studio a lot. his aunt was a dance teacher and with rather absent parents who meant well but both had long hours at the local hospital, he spent a lot of time with her. he fell in love with dance pretty early on, always having a certain fluidity and grace even when he was young.

— random but he also played hockey up until he was like 16 or whatever because he’s canadian and i’m not stupid. it happened. he can still skate tho. in a slightly different life he probably would have been a pretty good figure skater huh 🤔🤔🤔 but anyway...

— also feel like it makes sense that he did gymnastics. and trained in classical ballet.

— he went to university of toronto for college, studying kinesology and dance, and danced at one of the prestigious studios in the city.

— his big break moment was when in his sophomore year at ut, he made it onto the second season of world of dance in early 2017 ( lets pretend that show has been on longer than it has bc i don’t want it to be the first season of it sldk ). he made it all the way to the finals and quickly become a fan favorite along the way. though he ultimately placed second and missed out on the million dollars, that was the beginning of many doors opening for him. ( for those who, might have the vaguest clue what i’m talking about : i’m highkey feeling like, michael dameski style which is an idea i had after i named him michael so don’t @ me for him having the same first name ).

— millions watched that show, including some prominent agents and scouts who were able to help him launch a professional dance career : something he never thought he’d see himself actually doing. his first big gig was making the dance team for some singer’s north american tour, and he ended up not returning to ut to pursue a professional dance career full time. since then he’s danced in a few music videos for some uber famous musican ( same one he went on tour with or not idk ?? also a wc ?? maybe ?? ), a tv show, couple movies, and other various gigs around the city. he works part time at a studio when he has time, and has been honing his choreography skills as well.

— he makes enough dancing, but certainly not enough to make him RICH. no, that come from an impromptu vlog he did while on tour with aforementioned singer. having already garnered a following from world of dance, he soon rose to youtube fame as well, something he never could have predicted. i feel like his videos are very just, day in a life with various random challenges mixed in, and various workout and flexibility tips. he also still does pieces and duets with other prominent dancers just for fun too. his natural charisma and attitude really just carries him through easily lmao.

— mikey developed a bit of a habit of sleeping around when he left for college, all the newfound freedom was just intoxicating and well. he was hot so. it wasn’t like it was hard alsdkjf. that stuck around well into his blossoming dance career. nothing that was enough to be scandalous, but he made his way around. and then a year and a half into this unforeseen new life, he met matthew glass.

— he’d had a couple serious relationships before, one in high school, one his freshman year of college but neither of them could hold a flame to what he felt when he was with matt. perfection wasn’t something mikey believed in, but he almost did with what they had.

— it was like for over a year and a half he lived in this insane dream, and then mikey and matt broke up and he was devastated ( behind closed doors and with curtains pulled tightly shut ).

— he then proceeded to broadcast how perfectly fine he was doing by going back to his old ways and sleeping around obsessively, this time with very little regard as to how many headlines he was making. as far as coping mechanisms go, i guess sex is better than alcohol ?? not to say he wasn’t also drunk at times l o l.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂

— mikey is a... how do u say... im gunna write manwhore bc it’s accurate so pls don’t take offense. inch resting bc i’ve written smut like once in my eight year rping career but that’s what he decided he was gunna be and who am i to deny that.

— very bi. very much does not care. if the world didn’t know he was before, it definitely does now lmao. he hasn’t come out in the sense he’s like posted a video about it and said “i’m bisexual” but it’s pretty obvious from the media and maybe he has gotten asked in interviews and has just shrugged and been like does it matter ?? i’m sorry he’s not the vocal bi ally we need. perhaps we will work on that.

— hasn’t dated anyone since matt bc he’s highkey lowkey still hung up on him but no one needs to know that right. outwardly, he’s very much the same : seemingly happy, but he’s a lot more careful with his heart and letting people close to him. if anything he’s become a bit of a two-way mirror, always seeing out but never really letting people see in, just what they want to see.

— probably goes without saying but extremely flexible. idk if any of you know who juuse saros is but apparently he can twerk in a split and i’m not saying mikey can but like. he just might be able to...

— straight up does not get cold. never wears more than a hoodie, probably danced shirtless in the middle of winter just fine. at least being from winnipeg is good for one ( 1 ) thing.

— i feel like people call him flower. idk guys. maybe im just thinking too much abt hockey goalies.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

— he tends to be extremely underestimated as he comes across a bit dumb and generally has a pretty positive outlook on life which people confuse for him being naive when that isn’t the case. but he’s found he can use that it his advantage and that sometimes, people will tell him things they think he can’t understand but he hears and remembers everything. it’s helped him out of a few difficult situations before.

— i feel like he has a bit of ethan dolan’s personality & dumbass energy idk guys...

— live in the moment kind of dude. his motto is probably like : you just gotta know what you want to do next. i mean looking back on his life it’s been pretty crazy and that’s only solidified his outlook that like, you really can’t control too much. just let it go where it takes you.

— people do like him though and they like talking to him for whatever reason. generally has pretty trustworthy vibes but he’s more slippery than he comes across. he’s a selfish person at heart and always has his own best interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first.

— extroverted. i think ??

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

— 6′1″. chocolate brown eyes. curly brown hair. he has a lithe but extremely fit build due to his career. his core strength is especially impressive.

— he has a monochromatic lineart tattoo of a rose on his left forearm / wrist and a butterfly ( again monochromatic & just lineart ) on his right shoulder. small scar at the base of his neck by his ear from an unfortunate hockey accident.

— needs glasses but usually only wears contacts unless he’s in his apartment late at night.

— he’s not overly fashionable, going more for comfort than how he generally looks. on a regular day, he’s probably got the whole... college athlete look going if you know what i mean. a big fan of mirrored aviator sunglasses. wouldn’t know what dressing up meant even if it slapped him in the face.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

first and foremost i want to say that i like to vibe and brainstorm with people to come up with unique connections between our characters but here are a few ideas:

— the singer whose tour he danced on — singer whose music videos he’s been in — mayhaps even actors for that tv show / movie he was in ( v small role but whatevs. maybe they just Vibed yknow ) — flirtationship 😔 — always ye ol good hookup l o l — we keep running into each other idk maybe we should talk ??

TAKEN CONNECTIONS PAGE HERE

𝐎𝐎𝐂

hey guys, i’m ollie. my intros are either written really eloquently or a big mess bc im trying to rub together a couple braincells at 1 am and whatever comes out, comes out. no need to guess which category this one falls into lmAO. anyway, i’m a slow plotter bc i’m easily overwhelmed trying to do too many things at once but i swear i will try to get to as many people as i can. and yeah this entire character is inspired by my love of world of dance don’t @ me... if u made it all the way down here u should watch this bc 😳 & mikey has the same athleticism and strength.

#sixhqintro #( so....#this be a hot mess !!!!#but..#he's here lmao #hmu )#( im going to sleep soon bc it's almost 2 am and i have work tomorrow lmao )

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domesticsns · 5 years

Text

The Purple Turbo Tube Slide

Genre: Slice of life, Romance, Comedy, fluff

Main-pairing: SasuNaruSasu

Summary: Naruto (33) and Sasuke (33) go to their nephew’s birthday party. Soon Naruto goes off to play with the children while Sasuke spends some quality time with his the adults of his family. When Naruto gets a bit over his head he decides to slide down on a children's turbo tube slide and managed to get stuck half-way. Sasuke, annoyed his husband didn’t listen to his warnings, gets a surprise visit from the biggest demon he had to face during his childhood

The Purple Turbo Tube Slide, part one

Sasuke was fixing the collar of his white shirt before fastening the buttons on the ends of his sleeve. He looked over his shoulder to the bed where he could see his husband snoring loudly while hugging the pillows on the empty bed side.

“We’re going to be late,” Sasuke said his eyes fixated on Naruto’s face that was drooling over the pillow. The man had been getting up and falling back asleep for the past two hours. He continued snoring.

“Come on,” Sasuke turned around and walked over to the bed, shaking Naruto. “We have a lot to do.”

Naruto woke up, an groaned annoyed. He grabbed Sasuke’s wrist and pulled him in the bed.

“No, you are not getting out of this.” Sasuke sat up and pushed Naruto’s hand away from him.

“Isn’t there a nicer way to wake your husband up? I’ve heard people waking up to kisses or…” A small smirk appeared on his face.

Sasuke kicked Naruto on the side, so he rolled off the bed and onto the ground. He heard a soft moan once the men hit the floor. Sasuke leaned over the edge of the bed, looking at his idiot husband, making do with the fuzzy rug.

“I can get used to this, dattebayo..” Naruto muttered grabbing the black cat that was trying to get away and used her as a pillow to hug. Sasuke shook his head, but couldn’t supress a small smile. Naruto was adorable.

“Maybe if you were being nicer, I wouldn’t have such a hard time.”

Sasuke sighed deeply and mockingly began calling: “Sweetie, Baby, darling, Bambi, cutie pie, my one and only, sun of my moon-“

“OK-“ Naruto rolled on his back, and the black cat took her opportunity to get away an jump on the nightstand.

“The line goes, ‘Moon of my life’ and you would’ve known that if you watched HBO with me.” Naruto sat up and rubbed his eyes before looking up at Sasuke.

“Whatever,” The Uchiha sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down on his husband. They have been married for a while now, ever since they were twenty-eight and ran off and got eloped. Now they are thirty-three and still madly in love. It was so odd how opposite attract.

Naruto had ocean blue eyes, blond short hair, his left ear was covered in piercings, he had snake-bite piercings and another piercing in eyebrow. His right arm was covered in colourful tattoos, the colour orange sticking out the most because of the nine tailed fox on his upper arm. His stomach had some ancient sealing tattooed on it and his left arm was covered till his elbow, one of the tattoos was Sasuke’s name in hiragana. It is insane to tattoo your back then boyfriend’s name on your arm, but to be fair, he lost a bet with Sasuke and till now did not come to regret it.

Naruto was a nice person, pure hearted and good to the bones. He was friendly, helped everybody he could. He was kind and easy to talk to. He could even befriend the worst person on the earth and even they would end up caring about him.

Sasuke was the opposite of this. He had dark eyes that almost appeared to be black, his hair was midnight blue and his skin didn’t have any art on it or metal in it. He was cold and always saw the worst in people.

He leaned in and kissed Naruto’s forehead. Naruto smiled at this. They’ve been married for five years and yet every small bit of soft affection from Sasuke made his heart pound like a pre-teen madly in love.

“Fine, fine I’ll hit the shower.” Naruto said, getting up from the floor. “But I’ll get to choose the music on our way to Madara.”

“Fine,” Sasuke agreed “You know what you are going to wear?”

“Uhm...My orange sweater.” Naruto looked over at Sasuke, seeing his expression change ever so slightly.

“I guess…Just jeans with a shirt-“

Sasuke’s face did it again.

“….I go naked?” Naruto raised a questionable eyebrow.

Sasuke’s face did it a third time

“Uhm….What am I going to wear?” Naruto asked feeling the pressure of judgement on his shoulders.

“Well, I guess if you want me to choose what you wear today. I guess I can take a minute to think about it.”

“Don’t pretend like you haven’t been thinking about what I should be wearing all night.”

“Nonsense.” Sasuke said, and it sounded almost believable if it wasn’t for that slight twitch of his lip that formed a minor smirk.

Naruto shook his head.

“The first then minutes I was thinking about what I was going to wear.” Sasuke said.

Naruto gave his husband a small smile and headed to the bathroom where he proceeded to get ready for the day. He felt a bit hesitant because although he loved Sasuke and his family very much, his family had the tendency to be extremely…Savage. Naruto wasn’t sure if it was normal. He was an orphan ever since he could remember. He did not have any siblings, cousins, uncles or aunts. He didn’t know what was appropriate and what was normal. Sasuke was really close with his family. Ever since his mother died and his father wanted nothing to do with him. His brother and three cousins were always there for him. They were very important to Sasuke and so they were important to Naruto too. He sighed as he pulled on the clothes Sasuke had picked out for him and headed to the kitchen.

“How old is Obito now anyway?” Sasuke asked, he was sitting down on the bar table, apparently texting his brother.

“Turning eleven, I believe.” Naruto said, grabbing something to eat. Sasuke looked up from his phone to his husband and seemed generally pleased.

“You look handsome,” Sasuke commented, leaning over the bar table. Naruto smiled and leaned in to kiss Sasuke.

“What should we get him?” Naruto asked, “I was thinking-“

“A hunting knife.” Sasuke said absent minded as he read a message Itachi send him.

“He is eleven…” Naruto said, leaning on the table and giving his husband a questionable look.

“Yeah he could have some practice before he turns thirteen and Madara drops him off in the forest for a week to fend for himself.”

Naruto’s expression changed to one of horror before he could see Sasuke look up and give him a soft small smile.

“Joking.” He said before putting his phone down.

“What were you thinking?” Sasuke asked, giving his full attention to Naruto now.

“Video game. It is a bit expensive…And we would probably have to get two…” Naruto had a small grin on his face seeing Sasuke look slightly confused, “Because I kind of want to have the same game.”

“But it isn’t your birthday.” Sasuke said.

“But it will be in like eight months!” Naruto laughed, “I am an adult, I am going to get that game.”

“Sure,” Sasuke said, “then use your own credit cards except of your joined debit card.”

“Boy, when the Korean Elvis married us, you knew what you were getting into.” Naruto laughed, “A public school art teacher who is seriously underpaid.”

“But did you finish that other game that was almost sixty bucks?” Sasuke asked, folding his arms. “I thought we made a promise that you will have to finish a game before you buy another.”

Naruto raised an eyebrow and put his glass of apple juice down before walking towards the bookshelf and grabbed a book turning to Sasuke.

“Did you finish this?” He asked.

Sasuke eyed the book before looking Naruto straight in the eye.

“Yes.” He lied almost convincingly.

“How did it end?” Naruto asked.

“….They got married.” Sasuke remained his straight face.

“Did they though?” Naruto opened the book and looked at the last page. “No, they all die.” Naruto said, pushing the book back on the shelf hearing Sasuke whisper: “Spoilers much…”

He grabbed another book and held it up.

“So you haven’t finish that book and yet…These three books appeared out of nowhere on the shelf.”

“Yeah it is crazy how books just….Appear….” Sasuke sighed looking at Naruto giving him a ‘are you kidding me’ expression, “Alright buy the game.” Sasuke gave in.

They headed To the store to get the gift and headed towards Madara that was a two hour drive to his house in the suburbs. Madara was a men that was very well off. His house had five bedrooms and a huge garden. It was only him and his two sons, Obito and Tobi. His wife and him got divorced three years ago, but they remain on good terms. They went around the back and walked inside the garden. There was a swing set where Itachi was pushing his daughter, Naori. And Shisui was pushing his daughter, Mirai. The girls were laughing and shouting to go higher and higher. Up on the tree house Tobi and Obito, chasing one another.

“UNCLE SASUKE!” Obito shouted from on top of his longs. He slid down the purple turbo tube slide . He ran up to Sasuke and wrapped his arms around the men’s waist and hugged him tightly.

“Happy birthday,” Sasuke patting the boy’s head.

“I’m so glad you came!” The boy said excitedly.

“We got you something very good,” Naruto said, handing Obito the present. “It is actually PG 13,” Naruto whispered.

“Presents after dinner!” Madara shouted from the BBQ grill. He was wearing an apron saying ‘kiss the cook’. Obito had a pouting expression on his face.

“Uncle Naruto!” Naori and Mirai ran from the swing to Naruto and jumped at him. Tobi wrapped his arms around Naruto’s left arm and Mirai on his right one. Naori hugged his leg as she was just tall enough to reach Naruto’s thigh.

“I drew a cat. You wanna see. You wanna see!” Naori grabbed Naruto’s free arm.

“I drew a dog!” Tobi exclaimed.

“I drew unicorn!” Mirai added.

“Naori, Tobi, Mirai let your uncle Naruto first have a drink first, alright.” Itachi told his daughter and nephew. They both looked sad for a moment and so did Naruto. He looked over at Sasuke.

“Oh just go. Stay hydrated” He said, causing all four to smile again and run inside.

Itachi sighed and looked at his younger brother.

“How have you been, little brother.” He let his hand run down Sasuke’s hair, fixing it slightly on the sides.

“I am thirty-three, can you stop calling me little,” Sasuke said slightly annoyed as he tried pushing his brother’s hand away.

“You could be eighty-two and I still see that little boy running after me and begging me to play with him.” He laughed seeing Sasuke’s slightly embarrassed face.

“Oh remember when he was a baby and kept crawling towards you. Adorable!” Shisui tried to pinch Sasuke’s cheek, but Sasuke had no problem to slap his hand away as soon as it approached him.

“Don’t Shisui, you know he’s a cop now.” Itachi chuckled.

“I’m a detective.” Sasuke corrected his brother, but his words went unnoticed.

They walked up to the patio where the other members of the Uchiha-family were.

“Sasuke, I’m so happy to see you.” Izumi, Itachi’s wife, said as she got up from the chair and gave Sasuke a big hug. She has known him for almost twelve year and still managed to be oblivious to the fact that Sasuke did not like people inside his personal space. He decided to let it slide, yet another time, she did gave birth to his niece after-all. Kurenai, Shisui’s wife, did respect his personal space and greeted him with a simple nod.

“Oh the handsome Uchiha came too,” Mei, Madara’s ex-wife, walked outside, holding two cold beers in her hand. “I’m glad seeing you here again,” she said handing him a cold one and proceeded to smack his ass before sitting down between Kurenai and Izumi. Sasuke had an annoyed expression on his face, glaring at her. She smirked, taking a sip from her beer before putting her hands up and saying, “arrest me officer!”

The awkward tension was shrinking when Madara called for Sasuke: “ Hey Sasgay! Hey Sasgay!” he sniggered at his joke before pointed at the sausage on the grill.

“You want the sausage!” He laughed like he was the villain of a Disney movie.

“I would Maddy but you don’t seem to have it.” Sasuke said, causing Shisui, Kurenai and Izumi to laugh while Itachi tried to hold back his smile.

“Confirmed, it ain’t impressive!” Mei said loudly, “you would think with that bush of untamed hair you would have a-“

Mei was interrupted by the sound of something falling and breaking inside the house followed by Naruto’s voice shouting: “EVERYTHING IS FINE! NOTHING IS BROKEN!”

“I swear to God if that is my mother’s ashes…”

“I be damn happy the ugly urn is out of my house.” Mei finished Madara’s sentence for him. They shared a look and a grin. Even though they were divorced they were great co-parents with the occasional booty call. How they worked…It was a mystery to almost everybody present.

“Nah seems to be the Chinese vase they broke,” Sasuke said looking through the window.

“I thought the purpose of an adult watching over the kids was so they would not break anything.” Kurenai stated.

“Naruto is a slightly taller child,” Mei chuckled “By now you should know that.” She turned her gaze back at Sasuke, her eyes were looking at him like he was some sort of not so secret sexual desire of hers.

“I don’t understand, how are you gay?” Mei said, “I get if you are an ass kind of men, but women have asshole’s too.” She raised an eyebrow. “We’ve all done butt-stuff, right ladies!” she looked at Kurenai and Izumi that looked away, not willing to participate in the conversation. The awkward tension was back.

“Fine,” Mei sighed, a bored look took over, “But then why not a rich sugar daddy why a mere professor?”

“Professor?” Sasuke frowned slightly, “He teaches public school.”

“Oh, poor soul.” Madara said. “You know, I have a pretty good divorce lawyer…And he is also very into ass.”

“I get why you two were married…”Sasuke muttered and shook his head at Madara before looking back at Shisui.

“When is Izuna going to be here?” He asked.

“He said he was stuck in traffic-“

“That’s code for not having left the building yet,” Sasuke said, rolling his eyes.

Maybe if Izuna got here he could take some of the heat off Sasuke. Izuna was quite the hot mess of the family. He would have been able to swift the conversation away from Sasuke.

Sasuke took a sip from his beer before looking at the cool box and pushing it away from the door opening to the side. It caused most of the others to give him a slightly odd look, but soon their questions were answered when Obito, Mirai, Tobi and Naori ran from the back door in the garden, all four not looking in front of them as they rushed towards the tree house. Naruto ran outside getting a strange looks from his in-laws.

“…We’re playing a game….” He said.

“Naruto, you don’t have to look after the children. They’ll be fine as long as they are in our view.” Izumi said, “sit down, you want a beer?”

Naruto’s expression stiffened and Sasuke had a small smile on his face.

“Yeah…I would do that but…You know…We’re playing tag and you know…I am ‘it’ so…..” Naruto slowly walked away before sprinting off.

“He would make a great father, don’t you think?” Kurenai stated, getting an agreeing nods from Itachi and Shisui.

“Speaking of children-“

Sasuke rolled his eyes, he couldn’t believe how un-smooth they managed to swift the conversation to yet another sensitive topic.

“I don’t think so-“ Sasuke was quickly interrupted by Mei

“I would be honoured to be like your surrogate.” Mei said and for a moment Itachi looked very weirded out. He gave his brother a quick look and shook his head.

“No…” Sasuke said.

“Adoption is great too.” Shisui said. “We’re actually talking about adopting a second child.”

“Why you have good swimmers yourself, don’t you?” Madara commented.

“It is not about being fertile-“

“We’re bored already,” Madara added.

The door bell rung and Madara looked annoyed.

“it is probably Izuna,” Itachi said, “forgot to use the back door as stated in the evite.”

Madara walked back inside the house as Sasuke looked at the tree house where he could see Mirai, Naori and Obito ,Naruto and Tobi. He headed towards it.

Sasuke didn’t know how he got the ability to sense something going wrong before it happened, but he knew he become like this after Naruto and he moved in together.

“Hey Naruto,” he called out. Not a moment later his husband looked down. “I don’t think the tree house was built for more than two children-“

“Looks pretty steady to me.” right as he said that Mirai screamed at the sight of a spider and bumped right onto Obito that fell over the wooden window. Obito screamed but was saved by Sasuke who caught him in his arms. Obito stopped screaming and wrapped his arms around sasuke hugging him tightly.

“I’m so sorry!” Mirai shouted.

“Enough, everybody out of the tree house. That includes you Naruto.” Sasuke said with a strict voice. He was just happy no other adult has seen Obito fall down or else he wouldn’t hear the end of it.

“Owh men…” Naruto turned his head to Mirai, “you ruined it for all of us.”

“Thanks uncle Naruto…” You could see the slight annoyance on her face.

“Can I go from the turbo tube slide !” Naruto shouted as the children climbed down the ladder.

“It is designed for children, not grown men.” Sasuke said.

“I bet I fit in there…” Naruto said eyeing the turbo tube slide before diving head first in it. Sasuke could hear Naruto get stuck at the turn of the tube slide.

Sasuke put Obito on the ground, the boy was shaking.

“Get over yourself, you aren’t hurt.” Sasuke said harshly before walking to the end of the turbo tube slide .

“You’re stuck, aren’t you?” He asked squatting down at the end of the turbo tube slide .

“No….” He could hear Naruto’s voice echo. He couldn’t see him, it was too dark inside the purple tube.

“I told you not to. Do I need to call the fire department….Again?” he sighed. He really didn’t want to explain for a second time to the firefighters that Naruto was his husband, a thirty-three year old men and mentally not behind in a…Diagnosable way.

“No! I can totally get out of here!” Naruto shouted back. Sasuke shook his head while feeling somebody tap his shoulder. He didn’t want to hear any of his family’s mockery so he pushed the hand away without looking behind him.

“Not now, I’m busy because an idiotic moron got himself stuck inside a children’s turbo tube slide ! AND NEVER LISTENED TO ME!” Sasuke shouted the last part right inside the tube slide so Naruto could hear it echo.

“I’m sorry….” He could hear a slight mumble coming back.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and sighed deeply before turning around, expecting to see his brother, but the moment he did. His heart stopped beating and his body stiffened. His expression changed from annoyed to ultimately shocked.

Standing right in front of him was Fugaku Uchiha, his father, who he hadn’t seen or spoken to in ten years. The men who had belittled him, crushed him and abandoned him. The man that made every bit of love, happiness and light disappear from Sasuke’s life for the longest time.

Sasuke quickly looked in the corner of his eyes where he could see Madara, Itachi, Shisui and Izuna stand there staring at the situation speechlessly. Mei, Izumi and Kurenai looked confused. He felt like a weak hopeless child again.

“Hey! I can crawl! ” Naruto’s voice came from the slide, waking Sasuke’s up. He realised he was no longer a child he was an adult and he was a respected detective, he was married and had two cats. Yet his husband is stuck in a purple turbo tube slide for a second time in his life.

“Father…” Sasuke spoke softly.

“You look just like your mother.”

“That is not much of a compliment for an adult men.”

“It wasn’t meant as one. It’s an observation.”

“Very well.” Sasuke lowered his eyes, even when he tried to remind himself he was an adult his father did manage to get the upper hand and make him feel worthless.

“I see you got married” He indicated to the ring on Sasuke’s finger.

Just before Fugaku could say something else, he could hear a scream coming form the tube slide. Naruto slit out of the slide, head first, and landed on the ground. He groaned when his back hit the grass and looked up at the sky seeing his husband’s face giving him a concerned look and a grumpy old men giving him the most disgusted look he had ever seen somebody give him.

Naruto set up, rubbed the back of his head before standing up. From the conversation he heard from inside the tube slide, he wished he could have stayed stuck there for a little longer.

“Uhm…Hey…I’m Naruto….” Naruto said, getting up and extending his hand to Fugaku, he looked down at Naruto’s left hand, seeing a wedding ring, before looking at the extended hand in front of him.

He remained quiet.

TO BE CONTINUED

#narusasu #sasunaru #sns #naruto #sasuke #the uchihas #don't like don't read #domesticsns #first story post #fanfictions #sns fanfiction

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gross-bitch · 4 years

Text

I haven’t posted on here in a long time..

I’ve been doing good, I was feeling a lot happier in my skin for the first time in so long.

So now I’m gonna make this really long post about my story of what happened to me.. and also the story of how/why I’m in this mental space again of feeling like I’m nothing. It will be long and I really don’t care if anyone reads it or not, this is for me. This is my place to let lose my inner demons. So here goes.

I will be changing the names of people to kee their privacy(although they probably don’t deserve that.)

When I was about 12 I got introduced to this edgy dude who was 2 years older than me, who my whole family hated (we’ll call him Shane) and I just thought I was head over heals In love within. Fast forward a few months and he starts talking to me about how if we really love each other we would be having sex. I was young, I wasn’t ready for that but I left it up in the air cause I didn’t want to lose him, I told him I wasn’t ready but I would get there. Fast forward to the week before Halloween, my parents are out of town, my sister is supposed to be watching me but she’s never around. I invite him over cause I’m rebellious and think it’s a good idea, my family hates him so I don’t get any other chance to just sit and watch a movie with him so it sounds like a good idea.. until he goes to my room and when I tel him I don’t want to watch a movie there he tells me “it’s fine don’t be scared” then we’re watching Nightmare before Christmas as he starts feeling me up and I tell him no, multiple times.. I get a phone call from my brother “I’m heading home, I’ll be there in 30 minutes”. I turn to Shane and say: “you gotta leave, my brother will literally kill you if he sees you” which he turned and said to me “I’m not leaving til I get what I want”

I didn’t know.. I didn’t know that was rape. I continued to stay with him on and off for two years after that. I still have anxiety attacks when he gets mentioned to me.

When I was 16 I got asked on a date by the guy with a really nice fancy car (it’s not about the car, It’s just that I remember that car. Vividly) he took me to a movie, he took me to frozen yogurt. And then, when we got back in the car he opened my car door and instead of taking me home he said “we’ll just hangout at my place for a while and play video games or something” I agreed cause I didn’t wanna seem like I didn’t want to spend more time with him. We pull up to his house and I notice there isn’t any other vehicles there. We go inside and he brings me to his room and doesn’t turn on the tv... doesn’t turn on any gaming consoles.. instead he gets on top of me “I want to go home” I say. He says “no this will be more fun” I say “I don’t want to do this” and he says finally before I give in “c’mon, don’t be a tease I took you out I spent money and gas on this to make you feel special, let me make you feel special some more, plus how else will you get home if I’m not ready to take you home”...

I didn’t know. I didn’t know that was rape. I could have called my mom to come get me. I could have kicked and pushed him off me. But I didn’t, I let him take a piece of me because he made me feel so small, he made me feel like I had no other choice. Now, every time I see that kind of car I panic, I worry that it could be him and it takes me back to that room. I remember the smell of that room, I remember the pictures on his walls. I remember his breath on my neck..

When I was 19, my friend threw a party at her house, a coworker of mine told me he was going to be there and since my house was on the way from there to his house he said I could drink and he would make sure I got home safely. He promised me, he promised my best friend, he promised the owner of the house the party was at, that he was taking me straight to my house for me to safely fall asleep in my own bed. I proceeded to black out that night because I have a drinking problem, and I’m aware of that about myself now too. But when I woke up the next day, I was not safely in my own bed. I was in a room I didn’t recognize with someone I recognized all too well laying next to me. I woke up aware that I no longer had pants on.

This time I knew. I knew what he did to me. But I still let him get away with it. I didn’t want everyone who let him drive me home that night feel guily, I didn’t want to see myself as a victim. So what did I do? I dated him, I thought to myself “if I can fall for him, if I can have those feelings for him, then it won’t feel as wrong” it didn’t work.. and now he got away with it. I let him have a free pass from what happened, from what he did. I still work with him, I still break down in the bathroom when we have to work in the same zone. I still come home and look at myself in the mirror and don’t see my own body the same when I have to spend an 8hour workshift with him.

Now, I’m 20 years old. A month away from my 21st birthday. I make plans to spend the day with one of my very close friends, someone who knows these stories of my past. He knows I don’t trust easy he knows I’m damaged. I fall asleep on the couch cuddling my cat, he is watching tv on the couch next to me. If you know me, you know I don’t wear a bra around the apartment, I was wearing a T-shirt and some leggings. I wake up to his hand, rubbing my nipple, and then groping me. I panic and don’t know how to react, so I just roll over to which he quickly pulls his hand away sensing that I was waking up. At first, I ignore it, I pretend I didn’t feel what he had done, I pretend everything is fine. But someone made it clear when I told them later on that night that this wasn’t okay, that this was a problem that needed to be addressed.

This wasn’t rape, but it was sexual assault. And I’m not letting him get away with it like I’ve let the others get away with what they’d done. I addressed it to our mutual friends, I addressed it to management (he also works with me) I confronted him that I knew what he had done. He admitted it, he knew it was wrong but he still did it. And since then, I have been having panic attacks constantly. Atleast 3 a day.

There really is no point to this but for me to get it off my chest, and if anyone did decide to read this through, I want you to know you don’t have to be afraid to come out about what has happened to you. I’m sick of being scared and naive to the things that have happened to me. And I’m done being silent.

I am not my past, but it has made me who I am. And I truly hope, my story can help others grow stronger too.

That is all.

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lxiewrites · 7 years

Text

Embrace the Gay

Prompt from @bleusarcelle crabs and tomatoes

Inspiration from @ciuucalata who refuses to let my crab dream die

Context: I dreamt that I was being chased by a giant crab before I knew about this video and Ellie hasn’t stopped teasing me since. Lance is like 90% her.

Lance was already up when his phone rang at 2:38AM.

He groped for the cell lost to the mountains and folds of his blankets, rummaging through until he felt the familiar shape. Bringing the too bright screen to his face he stared into what was causing his insomnia.

The contact photo was of the boy with a stupidly cute pout on his face. He took it sneaky-like. This boy just did not like pictures. He remembered that it was when they were studying for the upcoming math test. He was staring at the study guide like it would give him the secrets of the world, a cute little pout on his lips. It was a pretty good picture all in all. He got the angle perfectly catching his jawline that could probably cut glass. The light streaming through illuminated him like a fucking halo and lighting his purple eyes like amethysts. His friend, his buddy, his pal, his BFFL (best friend for life)… his apparently gay best friend? Keith Kogane.

It was just a few weeks ago that Keith came out to him. It would’ve been very heartfelt and touching, a perfect Hallmark moment, if Lance didn’t eat those three bean burritos for lunch and farted right after. But it was fine, Keith had got to have known Lance would accept him for who he was. Just like how Lance knew he could come out to him that he was bi three months earlier.

The problem was…now Keith is gay… and he’s been having some issues… with feelings.

Keith wasn’t exactly his bi awakening but Lance never really let himself think of his best friend in that way. Don’t fall for a straight boy, his sister told him. But what if that straight boy is now gay and he has some minor chance in hell?

No. Nope, nu-uh, not happening. What if Keith thought he was just using him? What if he thought it was creepy? What if he rejected him? What if it made their friendship all awkward and weird? What if he didn’t like him anymore?

What if he lost him?

He always thought falling in love with your best friend the greatest thing ever. The movies made it seem so natural and magical but this isn’t the movies.

It’s fine. Everything’s fine. He would just continue on like normal.

He pressed the answer button. “What’s up, Mullet?” he rasped, his voice scratchy from disuse.

“Lance,” Keith’s voice was scratchy too. “I had a fucking weird dream.”

Lance chuckled, putting an arm behind his head as he relaxed for the tale. “You do realize it’s two AM right?”

“I had a really fucking weird dream,” the sleepy boy mumbled. He must be still half asleep. Lance ignored the swooping in his stomach at the thought of being the instinctive first person Keith told.

“Okay, okay, what was it?”

“I was chased by a giant crab.”

“….Pffftttt, what?”

“Giant crab,” he slurred, “chasing me on its little feet things. Skittering. Skkkssshhh, skkkksssshhhh, ssskkkkkssshhhhh.” Lance pressed his mouth into his shoulder to muffle his laugh. Sleepy tired Keith is the best Keith. He could almost imagine him being rolling over all cute, rubbing his eyes and poking Lance in the side to mumble something about giant crab, hair all floofed out. No, no, bad Lance! “It was chasing me and I couldn’t move but it never caught me but it was still chasing me.”

God, he was ridiculous at this stage, he’d believe anything. One time he Lance called him early in the morning and demanded why he wasn’t in class. It was Saturday. He was so pissed when he got to school only to see it closed except for the janitor.

…Aw, he was mean, he was so mean. He was gonna do it. Keith was gonna kill him but he’s gonna do it. “Hold on, buddy! I have a dream book!” He reached over to grope along the floor for a random book. He heaved his literacy book onto his lap.

“Why the fuck do you have a dream book?”

He flipped through the pages, pretending to look for the meaning of crabs. “I’m allowed to have interests. Don’t judge.” His response was a muffled grumble.

He couldn’t help but smile. He gasped, loudly and dramatically. He could hear the shifting of the covers on the other side of the phone and the sleepy hum. “It says here you’re gay!”

”What?” More rustling.

“Yeah, yeah! The crab means you’re gay because it represents sexuality because it doesn’t know which way it—And! You were running from it which means you’re running from your gay!”

”What the f—“

“Were there loafers?”

“…No, not re—“

“It emphasizes the gay!”

“WHAT THE FUCK!”

“And the lightning makes it super, ultra, mega gay!”

There was a beat, bed creaking. “Oh my fucking god; I’m gay.”

“Looks like, goodnight buddy!”

“Yeah…g’night…”

Lance hung up the phone, rolling over onto his stomach to hide his smile in the pillow. He waited a second… two…

The phone lit up with his pouty face. Snickering he accepted and brought the phone up to his—

“WAIT A FUCKING SECOND!”

Lance burst into laughter despite knowing he might wake up his parents and siblings.

“Hey, guys,” Keith greeted when he sat down at the lunch table, late as usual but thankfully before Hunk came. Pidge nodded with a short “’Sup,” but didn’t look up from the notes she was furiously scribbling. Lance shot him a shit-eating grin from where he stood, hovering over Pidge, at least until he saw his lunch.

Making a face Lance stuck out his tongue. “Bleh, how can you eat that? What even is it?” He leaned bodily over Pidge to peer closer at his lunch. Pidge didn’t react other to than let herself be flattened into the table, still writing. “Chicken? Beans?” He paused, lip twitching. “Crab?”

Keith slammed his tray on the table, lunch clattering, mysterious lunch spilling, and pointed an aggressive finger at him. “YOU SHUT YOUR FUCK!”

Lance burst out laughing while Pidge finally stopped writing and stared at Keith in confusion. She then looked at Lance and deadpanned, “What did you do.”

Still laughing Lance tried to look as affronted as he could with a grin on his face. Hand to his heart he gasped past his giggles, “Why do you think I did something?”

Keith pouted and kicked Lance under the table while sitting at the table like the talented motherfucker he is. “That’s because you did do something.”

“I helped you embrace your inner gay!”

“I’m already gay!”

“What does any of this have to do with crabs?!” Pidge yelled, arms spread out encompassing the what-the-fuckness of the situation. Her hands landed on the table with a thump before looking at Keith mouth agape and eyes wide behind her glasses. “Oh my god, you have crabs.”

“No!” he shouted.

Lance proceeded to die on the dirty floor of the cafeteria. He stood up again, kissing Pidge on the top of her head while avoiding the hand she flung out. “Then what the fuck, man!”

Keith planted his face in his hands and groaned. Lance decided to be the good guy his is and explain the entire situation. “Keith had a hentai dream with crabs—“ He yelped as a dinner roll nailed him in the face. Keith’s face was deadly, already armed with another roll. Lance tore a bite out of the roll out of spite before starting over and because he’s a masochist… “Fine, he had a dream about me with Sebastian the crab—“ And there was the second roll.

Pidge was snickering off to the side as Keith crossed his arms with a pout and a red face. “Okay,” Pidge said after she calmed down. “But we need to actually work on what we’re doing for Hunk’s birthday before he gets here.”

“Stop goofing around, Keith! We need to make this perfect for my best friend!”

“You’re the one—!” He huffed and planted his chin on his fist not looking at them. “Forget it,” he mumbled.

“Okay,” Pidge said, finishing her notes with a flourish. Tearing off a section she handed Lance the paper. “Lance, you got making dinner, this is the recipe. Keith, you got buying the decorations. Allura’s baking the cake and Shiro is making sure that Hunk gets there surprised.”

“And what will you be doing, Pidge?” Keith drawled, accepting his piece of paper.

“Uh, I’m the master genius of this plan? Duh. And I’m building him a computer so I’d shut up if I were you crabby.” She stuck her tongue out at him.

Keith grabbed a spoonful of the mysterious meat, relishing in the screams of horror from his two so-called friends.

Lance browsed the aisles, list held loosely between his fingers. The cart clattered as his partner dumped his items into the basket.

“Okay,” Keith started, “that’s the decorations, I might need to get a balloon pump or something.”

Lance held a hand over his heart and looked at him over his shoulder. “Buddy, my man, my pal, my lung capacity is amazing, save yo monies.”

Keith huffed in amusement and crossed his arms. “Fine, but I’m not driving you to the hospital when you have to blow up one hundred twenty balloons.”

“One hundre—bro! That is an excessive amount of balloons! Why so many?”

Keith raised his brows at him as if to say are you serious? “Don’t you want to make a balloon arch?” He sorted through his items with a distracted hand and murmured, “We might need to get more balloons actually.”

Lance stopped his browsing, shoved the list in his jacket pocket, and turned around, deadpanned look on his face. “We are not making a balloon arch, Keith.”

His brows furrowed and he pouted his stupid cute pout. “Why not?”

“Uh, because they’re tacky as hell? Nuh-uh, Hunk would not want a stupid balloon arch that he’d have no use for.”

“You don’t know, he could love it.”

“I am his best friend, I think I’d know whether or not Hunk would want a balloon arch for his birthday.”

“Well have you asked?”

“Why the hell would I ask if he liked balloon arches?”

“Well, why not?”

”Why would that be in an everyday conversation?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?’

”Oh my fucking God,” Lance groaned, trying not to laugh. He forced the corners of his lips down but it probably only served him to look more ridiculous. He shook his head, mildly alarmed when his bangs brushed Keith’s. He didn’t realize how close they got in their argument, foreheads almost touching.

The color was high in Keith’s cheeks, but he didn’t seem to notice their proximity, only squinting his indigo eyes at him. Lance stood up straight, adding much-needed distance between their faces. He could feel his face become warm as he coughed into his fist before planting it on his hip.

“Well, when it’s your birthday we’ll make a balloon arch for you.”

Keith’s not wrinkled in a mock grimace, the slightest tilt to his lips and smiling eyes. “Ew, no, balloon arches are tacky.”

Lance lunged forward with a battle cry. Keith barely dodged those long arms, laughing as he ducked under flailing limbs, but he wasn’t quick enough to escape grabby fingers that latched onto his jacket collar.

He squirmed and escaped his jacket, leaving him in his black T-shirt he spun around to grab it but Lance yanked it out of his reach. Lance glared down at Keith, smirk dancing across his face. “HA!”

“Lance, give me my jacket.”

“Uh, how about no.”

”Lance,” Keith growled.

”Keith.”

Keith lunged for it but he was stopped when Lance used his foot to kick the cart in front of him like a shield. Keith rubbed at his stomach where it scraped against him and glared. “I could climb you if I wanted.”

Lance gasped, turned his head, and placed the back of his hand to his mouth like some anime schoolgirl. He said in an exaggerated breathy voice, “Save it for the bedroom.”

Keith turned bright red and bit his lip. Damn, sometimes Lance wondered if Keith knew of his crush and did these things just to torment him. He wants to take that bitten lip and kiss it better. Run his tongue—

“Fine,” Keith spat.

Fine? Fine what?

Keith held out his hand. “At least give me your jacket to keep warm, it’s like fifty degrees out.”

Wait, what? Keith wants to wear his jacket??

Lance scrutinized him. Does he know what he’s asking? The implication? It’s unlikely because it’s Keith. Keith who’s as oblivious to social cues and unsaid gestures as he is to the concepts of cheers. He looked almost bored, maybe expectant, hand out and wiggling his fingers.

It’s Keith; of course he wouldn’t get it.

But even if Keith didn’t know did not mean that Lance couldn’t get a little excited at seeing Keith in his jacket. Hisjacket. All cute and snuggly and warm in his jacket. He sighed, at the situation or himself he didn’t really know but he shucked off his jacket, still keeping his hand on Keith’s before draping it over the extended palm.

Keith pushed his arms through and oh good gravy it was too big on him. Only the tips of his fingers stuck out of the sleeves. He adjusted the jacket around his shoulders a pleased hum in the back of his throat. “It’s really warm.”

Did he die? Did Lance die in the canned food aisle due to the cuteness overload?

Covering how flustered he was sure he was he shoved on Keith’s jacket. The sleeves slightly too short, they didn’t even cover his wrists, and if it was a cropped jacket on Keith it fell only to his ribs.

“How the hell do you stay warm in this? This is, like, nothing. Keith, buddy, we need to get you a proper jacket.”

“Thanks, but I got one.”

Lance glared at him, still trying to make the jacket work around his shoulders. It didn’t. He took it off and tied it around his waist. “You’re a little shit.”

A chuckle was his only answer. “What else do you need?”

Lance turned around to go back to scanning the canned goods. “Mmm, I still need tomatoes… and crab.”

He flinched when a hard punch landed on his shoulder. “Ow!” he exclaimed, rubbing his shoulder and pouting at the glaring boy next to him.

“Good!” his so-called friend said before hitting him again.

“Will you—ow! Stop, dude! Will you stop? Ow, stop hitting me! We really do need it, check the list!”

The hits slowed, but Keith got one more swat to his stomach before reaching in to look at the ingredient list. “What the fuck are you even making?”

Lance snatched the list out of Keith’s hands and shoved it in his pants pocket. “Gordon Ramsey’s crab spaghetti, I wouldn’t ruin my best bud’s birthday with your weird gay crab dream.” He set his hand on Keith’s shoulder and squeezed. “Just accept your gay, Keith.”

“I’m already gay!”

“That’s why it’s hilarious!”

Keith crossed his arms grumbling. Pouting, he turned slightly away from him and muttered something under his breath.

“What was that?”

Keith side-eyed him. “I thought I was your best friend.”

Lance bit his lip to keep from smiling too big. Keith was really going to kill him one day. He wrapped an arm around him, pulling him to his side. “You’re more than my best friend, Keith.”

Keith looked up at him, those starry eyes sucking him in like no other. Ignoring his heart rate he smirked. “You’re my BFFL.”

Keith’s expression fell flat. “Oh my God.”

“Sauté! Sauté! Oh my God! What are you doing?!”

“Stop telling me what to do, Keith! I’m not taking advice from someone who reduces everything to ash!” Lance bumped Keith out of the way as he reached for a spatula. Stirring the quickly charring onions and garlic he screamed at Keith to tell him the next step in the instructions.

“Pour in the white wine and reduce it.”

“Reduce it? Reduce it to what? Water? I’m not Jesus!”

Keith laughed. “You know what that means you fucking nerd!”

Lance poured the wine in a steady stream; the pan sizzled loudly. He darted a look at Keith who was biting a corner of his lip to keep from smiling. Lance allowed himself to second or two at looking at him before gasping loudly. “You kiss your gay crab with that mouth?!”

Keith slammed his hand on the counter, pointing the other at him threateningly. “I swear to god Lance if you mention that crab dream one more time I’ll shank you.”

Lance laughed, stirring the dish in front of him. “But it’s so funny!”

“I told you I was gay a few months ago!”

“And this was just a manifestation of your gayness. Embrace your inner gay, Keith.”

A hand fisted in his shirt and brought him down a couple of inches to look into the glowering face of Keith Kogane. “I. Have. Embraced. My. Gay.” he growled.

Lance gulped, staring into those furious violet eyes. They were so close he could count nearly every single star placed in those eyes. The tips of their noses brush with every inhalation. Only a few centimeters of air kept him from taking that plump bottom lip between his own.

Any moment. Any minute now Keith was going to pull away and bring him back to reality. He was going to back up and threaten him to stop it with the crab jokes and Lance was going to laugh it off and go back to stirring. He was going to reduce the wine before he forgot himself and do something stupid.

Except Keith wasn’t backing away. The grip on his shirt lightened but still kept him right where he was. And he didn’t try too hard to step back. His breaths were shallow as he tried to keep from looking at the lips that were so temptingly close. His eyelids drooped and he tilted his head down the slightest bit.

BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP!!!

“Oh, fuck!” Lance lunged the burning dish to the sink, turning on the tap.

He turned around to see Keith climbing on the counter of the marble island reaching up to swipe at the fire alarm. He jumped slightly to get closer, heel coming dangerously close to the edge.

“Get down from there! You’re gonna hurt yourself!” Lance shouted, marching over. He coughed when he inhaled a lungful of black smoke from the burnt food. Keith was still trying to get at the smoke alarm but was just barely too short, fingers brushing but not enough to actually grab it and turn it off. Lance wrapped his arms around his hips, bracing himself for the shift of weight while he prepared to pick the Korean boy up.

“Hey!”

Lance dropped him to the side, shoving him in the direction of the window. “Open up the windows, I’ll get the smoke alarm!”

Climbing on top of the counter he could easily reach with his long limbs. He could hear Keith grumbling about unfair height advantages but he still opened the window, the cold bite of winter air nipping at any bare skin available.

Alarm quiet and smoke drifting lazily out the window Lance hopped down. He went to grab a towel to help flap the smoke out, ignoring the self-satisfied look Keith gave him.

“Who was it that turns everything to ash?”

“Oh, shut up, Keith.”

“SURPRISE!”

The lights came on and everyone came out of their hiding places. Leaping out at a surprised Hunk who looked close to tears.

“You guys! I can’t believe you did this!”

“Of course buddy!” Lance said, sauntering over, wrapping an arm around him. “Only the best for you buddy!”

Hunk leaned down and in a hushed tone murmured to Lance, “Okay but the cake…”

“Allura.”

Hunk breathed a sigh of relief, hand to his heart. “Oh thank God. Who made dinner?”

“Uuhh, you see, Keith and I just helped each other with our—“

“You guys burnt it didn’t you. Lance! What have I told you guys about cooking?! If it’s not perfect it’s not leaving the kitchen!”

“W-well, I kicked him out of the kitchen and then it was fine!”

“Hey, I resent that,” Keith said coming over, giving the big guy a hug. “Lance burned it without my help.”

“Uh, you totally were the reason why the food burned Mr. Crabs-for-brains.”

“Crabs?” Hunk asked.

“Keith has crabs,” Pidge said shoving Keith out of the way to leap at Hunk, hugging him. “Don’t worry I kept Shiro away from any cooking,” she whispered.

“I don’t have crabs!”

“You just dream of them.”

Keith covered his face and groaned in his hands.

“Do we need to have a talk about safe sex?” Shiro teased, ignoring Keith’s shout. He leaned over and hugged Hunk. “Happy birthday, Hunk.”

Allura hugged him next. “I made your favorite cake.” She stepped back and smiled. “Happy birthday, Hunk.”

“Happy birthday!” they all chorused.

It was a little while later when Hunk cornered Lance in the kitchen on a mission to retrieve more cake that he started teasing him. “So you and Keith, huh,” he said with a smug smile.

“Yeeess,” Lance drawled, “what of it?”

“Have you two been…sitting in a tree lately?” Lance groaned and pushed Hunk’s smirking face away from him. He cut a large slice from the freaking three-tiered cake that Allura baked, mussing the passion fruit frosting on the transfer to his plate.

”No, we haven’t.” He scraped off the extra frosting off the knife.

“Who hasn’t what?” Keith asked, hitching a thumb behind him. “And how long does it take to get a piece of cake? Pidge is setting up the video game system.”

“Oh! That’s my cue to go!” Hunk exclaimed rushing out. “Pidge! It’s my birthday, I have the right to call dibs!”

Both boys chuckled at the distant fight over characters. “So who hasn’t what?” Keith asked, leaning against the counter.

“Oh, just—hey! Get your own frosting! We’re just talking about how you haven’t accepted your gayness yet.”

“I was already gay, Lance! That doesn’t even make any sense!”

“Keith. Keith, Keith, Keith. Keith. My man, that’s exactly why it’s funny,” He placed a hand on his shoulder. “You are gay but you haven’t accepted your gay.” He placed a hand on his heart doing his best to keep a neutral face. “That’s why you had the crab dream, I’m glad I was able to help your gay awakening, Keith.”

“Lance,” Keith growled, he gripped his shirtfront and got right up into Lance’s face. “You were my gay awakening!”

As soon as Keith said it he looked horrified, letting go of his shirt and backing up slightly.

Lance’s mouth was still agape as his mind tried to catch up to his ears, hands still suspended in the air. Before Keith could turn and run he reached out and grabbed his shoulder, hand fisting in the material of his jacket. “Wha-what?” The words died in his throat. He tried again. “What did you just say?”

“I didn’t—I—I mean—“

“You said I was your gay awakening,” Lance said, still dazed. “Like, how? As in you find me attractive or…”

“I— I…” Keith looked off to the side searching for an escape but didn’t move. “I find you attractive but also I just…” He sighed and looked him in the eye, violet eyes determined but a softness was there. Something that could get hurt if handled roughly. “I have a crush on you. I’ve had a crush on you for a long time. But I didn’t really think about it until you told me you were bi. It wasn’t even something conscious I was just, ‘I have a chance’. But this is just weird. It’s weird, right? It’s stupid and gonna mess up our friendship and can we just for—“

Lance didn’t even realize he moved, only that Keith was rambling and being so unsure of himself was so out of character that he somehow had to stop it. Next thing he knew he was cupping Keith’s face and kissing him. Taking those soft lips and slotting them between his own. Soft kisses and a gentle grip allowing him to back off if he wanted. Keith sighed into his mouth and only got closer, arms encircling his neck as he lined his body up with his.

Lance groaned parted from him, chest warming from how Keith chased him. Slowly Keith opened his eyes, licking his lips as if he could still taste Lance on his lips. He looked up at him, brow furrowed, lips still wet from kissing. “Was that out of pi—mmph.”

Keith wrenched his head back, pout on his lips. “Stop that. Just answer me if—mmph.”

Keith allowed the kiss for a few seconds before jabbing Lance in the stomach with a pointy finger. He glared at him, trying to maintain the stern composure but Lance could see a laugh fraying the edges of his expression. “Just give me an answer you dork!”

“I keep kissing you! Doesn’t that give you the answer!?” Lance laughed. He rested his forehead against Keith’s. “Listen, I liked you for a long time. I don’t really know for how long but I know I couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss you or even hold your hand. Especially, after you told me you were gay. I thought I finally had a chance too.”

“…Well, I guess that answers my question.”

They burst into giggles, still holding the other close. A voice popped the bubble they put themselves in. “Hey, are you guys coming out of the kitchen anytime soon? We’re already on the third round!”

They looked at each other and smiled. “We’re coming!” Lance called. Keith grabbed his hand with a small smile, leading them out to the others.

“Wait! My cake!”

Lance was already awake when his phone rang at 2:40AM. Though for far better reasons than last time.

He answered. “Hey, babe, weird dream?”

He heard a gentle murmur over the phone and the rustle of the covers. “Not too weird this time,” he whispered, smile in his voice. “This time I had a weird dream about being in Goodwill and shopping for flannel. I actually got a good one before I woke up and realized it was a dream.”

“You dreamed about getting flannel?”

“Mmhm,” he hummed, more sounds of him getting comfortable under the covers.

He was quiet, waiting for the breaths of his boyfriend to gentle, a steady in and out right before he fell asleep. “That’s really gay.”

A long and loud groan muffled in a pillow was his answer. “Don’t you fucking start.”

“Your dream self finally accepted your gay.”

“Lance, you’re my boyfriend. OF COURSE I’M GAY!” In the background, he could hear the creaking of a door and the soft sound of someone else speaking. “Yeah, sorry Shiro, I’ll keep loud gay revelations to myself, sorry.” The sound of the door closing. “See what you done.”

Lance snickered into the back of his hand. “Aw, come on. You love me.”

“Can’t even tell you about any kind of dream without it going back to the crabs,” he muttered. He heaved a great sigh and Lance heard the smile in his voice. “I do. Love you, I suppose.”

Lance felt his chest fill with warm butterflies. “Good night, I’ll see you tomorrow.” He grinned. “Try not to wake up too crabby.”

”RRRAAAAHHH!!” The door opened again followed by a tired, “Keith, please.”

“Sorry, Shiro.”

Ao3

#VLD #lex writes #klance #keith #Lance #my dream #gay awakening #crabs

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daydreamnct · 7 years

Text

What it Feels Like

Requested: Yes

Word Count: 1,687

Characters: You(f) + NCT’s Ten (ft. EXO Baekhyun)

Genre: Angst

PART 2 / PART 3

When my agency approached me and asked if I would be comfortable with getting fake married to another celebrity, strangely enough my first thought was not about asking my boyfriend of 3 years.

In fact, Ten didn’t even cross my mind as I excitedly accepted the opportunity to be on one of my favourite reality TV shows ‘We Got Married’. Instead, I thought about how much I used to enjoy watching my favourite stars slowly become closer and more attracted to their husband or wife, how it revealed different sides of them that you wouldn’t expect and how the idea that they had real feelings for each other felt so important to me as a twelve-year-old.

It was only after I left the meeting with my managers that I thought about Ten. I thought about how I would be spending what was my free time entirely with someone else, getting to know them and building an on-screen chemistry with them – something that my boyfriend and I couldn’t have. Part of me felt guilty, but I knew that Ten and I trusted each other enough to overcome the difficulties that come with being in a secret relationship. We loved each other.

When I got back to the dorms that evening, I facetimed Ten after the evening meal with my members. This was our routine – we weren’t allowed to meet up in person. Ten’s agency was much more popular than mine, but the rules were the same: No Dating. Ten’s group had newly debuted whereas mine had passed its two-year anniversary, but Ten and I had met when we were both trainees and attending the same international school. We had chemistry almost immediately, with both of us sharing a love for dance that developed into something more quite quickly. He was destined to be successful, and I felt lucky to be a part of his life. We made a promise when we became an item that we would make the relationship work. We were important to each other.

We were passionate people, and couldn’t hide our feelings that well. But that didn’t matter because we always told each other the truth. When I told Ten about the show, he told me straight away that he was happy for me; but I could see that he was upset. I tried to reassure him that it doesn’t matter who they pick to be my husband, nobody could ever make me feel how he did. He smiled and said that he was fine with it, that he trusted me, and that he loved me. I don’t know if I really believed him or not, but I let myself ignore the thought in the back of my mind that I had messed up. I told him that everything would be okay, that the show was fake and that it would be like all the other times we’ve had projects with other people. We were lying to each other.

The main thing we had established was that who I was marrying wasn’t important. The show wanted it to be a surprise, have our first meeting caught on camera. I was advised by my publicist that the most important thing about this show was portraying a connection between my husband and myself, so my intention was to become friendly enough with them that conversation would flow and skinship wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. The set up for our meeting was a picnic in the park, and I got there first. I was expecting to be paired with an actor, but then I saw him and knew this was not going to go how we planned. EXO’s main vocalist Byun Baekhyun walking towards me with a grin on his face. He hadn’t spotted me yet, so I tried to make sense of the thoughts in my head in the time I had. Not only was he a member of the same company as Ten, he also had seniority over him and was someone Ten highly respected. I understood why we had been chosen as a couple: we both came from well-known idol groups whose collective fanbase would boost ratings for the show. Added onto that, we both came across as extroverted and were known for being good at variety which would probably make it easier for us to get along. I knew that I was lucky, this was a member of one of the most popular boy groups in East Asia and I was paired with him. So, I decided then to take full advantage of the opportunity, not just for my career but for my group and my company who I knew were counting on me to increase popularity (and income).

I tried to get into character. My heart is available, I told myself. I couldn’t give my true feelings for Ten away so I had to act like any other female would in that situation. It was just acting.

And that’s exactly what it was like. Acting. I could tell Ten thought differently, and because we were in a relationship I respected and understood the fact that he wasn’t happy. But it didn’t seem like he respected and understood the fact that this was important to me. I may have had worries to begin with about how my feelings might develop, but as it became more of a regular thing I realised that Baekhyun was a pretty normal (super rich and famous) guy who I didn’t have any real chemistry with, not like I did with Ten. My chemistry with Baekhyun was different. We were colleagues at work, both of us controlling the sides of ourselves that the other, and the world, saw.

My relationship with Ten started to change. We spoke less frequently and he always seemed to have an excuse for why he was busy. I never called him out on it, mainly because I was afraid for what was happening. I went to work every day, pretended to be happy and pretended that I was growing closer to Baekhyun. In reality, I was getting more and more tired of the pretence and tired in general as I was given more work outside of my group. We could both tell we were unhappy, but we were both too exhausted to work on the relationship.

Then one night about three months into the show, everything changed.

I had been away on the weekend for a music video shoot, so I hadn’t spoken to Ten for those two days. I missed him like crazy and I just wanted to hear his voice or see his face, so I messaged him and asked if he was at the dorms. He replied a short ‘Yes’, which seemed out of character but I was feeling emotional and tired and I just wanted to hug him. I missed my Ten, the one who could make me laugh and who I was so deeply in love with. Instead of making me happy, thinking about Ten made me sad and made me long for what we were before. I messaged back with ‘I’ll come to you’ and snuck out to visit him without waiting for a reply. We used to do this more back in the early days, but this time it felt different. I felt like I wasn’t allowed to go and I felt anxious about whether or not he would want to see me. I brushed the thought away because that’s not how me and Ten were. We were each other’s home, always welcome where the other was. It was a surprisingly quick trip, there was usually some type of work being done on the road that would add about 5 minutes to the journey. As the taxi pulled up outside the building, a message came through on my phone.

‘I’m too tired, going to sleep’.

Those six words filled me with such sadness, and mixed with sleep deprivation I couldn’t help but burst into noisy tears in the back of the taxi. The driver had to ask me if I was alright, if I wanted to go back, but I was here now. I couldn’t believe that I wasn’t allowed in, that he wouldn’t let me in. He had shut me out.

I swallowed my pride and headed towards Ten’s dorm room. I lifted a hand to knock on the door when I heard a sound that filled me with dread. A flirtatious giggle. From a girl. In Ten’s room.

A million thoughts rushed through my mind to try and justify the sound. Was he watching TV? He shared the dorm with other guys maybe they had a girlfriend over? I reached up to knock again when, to my surprise, the door opened and I was face to face with a girl I had never met. “Oh!” she said, and she laughed as she almost ran into me. The same giggle I’d heard a moment ago from behind the door. Who are you? What are you doing here? Who are you here for? These were some of the questions that ran through my mind as the girl’s facial expression grew more confused and uncomfortable. “I’ll just, um, go. Bye Ten” she said as she looked behind her and waved at Ten who I hadn’t noticed was standing there. She took a final confused glance at me and walked away quickly, brushing past me and almost making me lose my balance in the process. In her defence I must have looked insane, I hadn’t looked in the mirror after crying and I probably had mascara on my face.

Ten hadn’t stopped staring at me as though he had seen a ghost, as though his worst nightmare had come true. Suddenly, his face hardened as he proceeded to break my heart. “This is what it feels like” he said, looking the most miserable I had ever seen him. When did we become so miserable? I hadn’t noticed. I continued to stand there in silence when he broke eye contact with me. “You should leave” he whispered as he slowly pushed the door shut.

I was left staring at a closed door.

a/n: Because I’m a massive bitch and I have no soul here’s an angsty af Ten scenario. It was requested but it was supposed to have a happy ending. Let me know if you’re interested in a part two? - Kat

#angst #scenarios #nct ten #nct u #ten #ten chittaphon #exo baekhyun #nct scenarios #kpop fanfiction

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one-shot-wonderland-blog · 7 years

Text

Devil's Choir Chapter 2

Spider was meowing below the bed, causing me to wake up. His black and white fur mixing in with the monochrome colors of my comforter. I sighed, not wanting to get up, but knew better than to go back to bed. Groaning as I sat up in bed, I rubbed the sleep out from my eyes. I reached down the side of the bed and grabbed Spider by the mid drift, lifting him up off the ground and placed him on my lap. He´s old and doesn’t do much any more, but I still keep him. Mostly because I've had him since my freshman year. If I lost him, I´d probably cry for days. I slowly got up from my bed and it was barely the crack of dawn. I bent my body and rested my head on Spider´s, forcefully rubbing it back and forth. ¨Oh, Spidy, Spidy, Spidy. You're such a menace. What am I gonna do with you?¨ He looked up at me with his big green beady eyes, almost regretting the fact he woke me up. I sighed, ¨I'm just kidding, I'm not gonna do anything to you.¨ Still looking at me like I had done him wrong, he stood up on my knees and meowed like he used to do when he was just a kitten. He sounded like a squeaker dog toy that was on the verge of dying. I laughed at him and he rubbed his cheeks against my chest. “Awe, are you being a kitten? Huh? Are you so cute? Yes, yes you are.” He jumped down from the bed and walked his way to his empty food bowl in the kitchen. “Mreow?” he asked. “Fine,” I told him. “I’ll get you more food.” I walked over to his cabinet under the stove, where I keep all his treats and foods, and pulled out his Purina dry food. He hopped on his hind legs and put his front paws on his stomach, making him look like a lucky cat from china. “You’re getting tubby, aren’t ya? Time to cut down on your food again.” He gave me a look of desperation. “Don’t look at me like that. You need to exercise and you know it.” I filled his food bowl halfway and put the bag back in the cabinet. Not even bothering to eat breakfast, I went back to my room to grab my clothes that I was going to wear to work today and my shower stuff and headed to the bathroom. In the shower, I grabbed my razor from the top of the tiling, bringing it down to my thighs. I slowly pressed it on my thick elephant skin and pulled it across to the other side. The sting from the hot water coming from the head of the shower felt like pure hell across my fresh cuts. I sighed in the beautiful pain. The sting of pain turned into a kiss of an angel. I went in for another, and another, and another, until my entire right thigh was covered in open flesh wounds. I began to wash my hair and shave my body, and soon got out the shower. I put on an old merch shirt that Andy got me for my birthday. Rancid was the first punk rock band I was introduced to, and it was all thanks to him. I put on my shirt and my black skinny jeans with the red and black diamonds. I pulled my towel over my shoulders and then proceed to blow dry my hair. My nice and worn out purple and pink hair. It was all worn and fading from the time I was in the hospital, and couldn’t redye my hair a new color. 'I need to fix this before I do another video today,’ I thought. ‘I can get more hair dye when I finish work today. I don’t know what color I want though. I haven’t had green in a while.’ I decided to add my red flannel jacket when I go out. I didn’t have to go in for work until one, so I just stayed inside. 'I should probably pack, if I’m going on tour.’ I sighed to myself and I was off to my closet to get my suitcase, then realized I still haven’t unpack the cases from when I was over at our summer house the day before. I grabbed the suitcases from the outside of my bedroom, in the hallway. I unpacked the stuff from the summer house and started packing for my two month long tour. Then I packed two weeks worth of clothes, my art supplies, and writing materials, saving thetime to pack all my makeup and electronics and chargers for Monday, when they kick off the tour. 'It’s going to be two months for Spider to be all alone,’ I thought. ‘I’m going to need Tessa to look after him. Oh, yay.’ I spoke to myself aloud, “That’s going to be another thing to look forward to today, Anna’s going to be super affectionate to me, when I show up in for work. Mike is going to kill me too, leaving work for a whole two weeks, I’m probably going to get fired. Yay!” I added sarcastically. I sat on my bed and turned to face the analog clock on the wall, watching the clock ticking every second. It says it’s almost eleven, it’s got to be wrong. I got up and walked over to the opposite side of the room to get my iphone. It’s eleven twenty, on the nose. 'How long did I shower for,’ I joked to myself. I started getting ready for work, setting out my skateboard and my flannel jacket on the counter. I grabbed my name tag from the junk bowl. 'I should clean that out at some point,’ I thought. I messed around on my iPad for about another hour, editing my video, before I started making my way to work. ‘I need to ask if Chase can take me to the gates for tour Monday. He said that he and mom were staying in town for another week, so hopefully he’ll say yes. I got a water bottle from the cabinet and filled it with Grape Crush. I pulled my flannel on top of my shirt, while grabbing skateboard and running out the door, locking it behind me. I got down from the third story, where my room is, and onto the pavement. Jumping on my skateboard and riding down the street to the mall, where I work at. Hot Topic is the best place to work, ‘cause not only do you get a discount on selling goods, as we have to call them, you also get to hang out with band members after they do signings at your store, and plus you get pre-released stuff. Like, the things that go on the shelf before they’re on the shelf. I love working at Hot Topic, it’s quite literally is my life at this point. I was about halfway through the parking lot, when I spotted that the Black Veil Brides’ tour bus was behind the spot where Hot Topic was. I cringed as I thought, ‘I really hope that they’re not at HT. I will seriously punch Andy in the face if he is.’ I dragged my feet the rest of the way to work, really hoping that they were just resting at Starbucks or something. ‘Please,’ I thought, as I walked through the sea of people. ‘If there is a God out there, please, for the love of all things that are holy, please, don’t let Andy be here.’ Of course, the universe just loves proving me wrong, that’s just freaking lovely; Andy was talking to Anna, who, just so happens to be my best friend and his cousin. As always, I walk in after a long time away from work, and Anna screams from the top of her lungs. “Annie!” she yelled from the opposite side of the room. “You’re back!” She ran across the room, which was all of about ten feet. "Shine a light,” I exclaimed, as she jumped on me, causing us to fall to the ground. “Can’t breathe, lights fading, growing dimmer, oxygen running out, dying. . . ,” I said in my most dramatic voice. “Oh, please,” Anna said. “You can never die. You’re immo- immortal,” she mimicked Fall Out Boy’s Immortal song, very badly, might I add. I shoved my hand in her face, making hercringe and stop singing at the same time, thank god. She moved my hand out of the way to say, “You mock me, I am a true genius.” “Yeah,” I pretended to agree. “A true genius of stupidity.” She gasped, “How dare you?” "I didn’t dare,” I joked. “It was wide open.” I grinned when I saw her jaw drop so low. “Ouch,” Andy’s husky voice interrupted. “Ann, are you gonna stand there and take that.” His joking tone, just making me more mad at him than when he left Cincinnati without me. “I don’t know if I am,” Anna sounded as if she actually agree with him, though I hope that she was only just kidding. “Are you sorry?” she asked me. I stood up from the dirty ground leaving Anna to fall on her butt. “What the hell do I have to sorry for? I did nothing wrong. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to talk to Mike.” “Sorry,” Ann tried to say but I started walking away before she could say anything else. I walked my way towards the back of the store and caught Ashley pranking Jake with a joy buzzer, then laughing hysterically at each other. I knocked on the Door that was newly labeled “Manager Mike Muller”. I heard a come in from the opposite side of the door. I popped my head in to let him know I’m back to work. He then motioned for me to take a seat. “Listen,” I started, but was rudely interrupted. “I don’t care,” his stern voice overpowered the room. 'Here it comes,’ I thought. ‘I’m fired.’ “You can try to kill yourself all you want,” he said, gaining some empathy. “But, you should always know, that everyone here has been through their share of hard times. So, if you need someone to talk to, we are all here for you. My door is always open, unless there is someone important in here then it’s not, but you get the point. Alright, you’re a good kid, I know your are. So, get back out there and try your damn hardest.” I started crying, from the motivational speech, that I’ll most likely not going to be able to keep my promise to. “Go to the bathroom and get yourself cleaned up,” he added. I got up and left the room, proceeding to go to Anna and tell her sorry. I saw her out of the corner of my teary eye and walked over to her. Andy saw me first, but I didn’t care. I walked straight into Ann and hugged her from behind. "What the heck?” she exclaimed. “Annie? Are you okay?” I didn’t want any more sympathy than I already needed, so I just shook my head no. "What’s wrong?” Andy asked. I shook my head again, not wanting to actually hurt Andy’s feelings. “I don’t think she wants to talk right now,” Ann said. Andy walked over behind Anna and unlatched me from her back. I automatically relatched myself onto Andy, making him doubletake. “She’s not a fan, is she?” Andy asked Anna. “Bella de la etape,” I told him our little code, from when we were in high school. We had french and theatre, so we got bell de la etape, which means beauty of the stage. "Anniebella?” Andy asked. I nodded into his chest awkwardly and hugged him tighter. “God,” he said shockingly. “It’s been forever.” I saw Ann knit her eyebrows together in the corner of my eye, then opened her mouth to say, “You mean, all this time, I’ve been the only one who knew Andy and you? You two haven’t heard from each other in. . . god, knows how long?” “Guess so,” Andy chuckled. Anna rolled her eyes and said, “I have to get this customer. Don’t you dare run off again,” she added pointing her finger at me. I smiled into Andy’s shirt and closed my eyes. “I missed you petit ouers,” I giggled, being able to say his nickname again, without people thinking I was crazy. ��Please,” he begged. “ The guys are here.” I managed to pull myself away from him and put my hands on my thick waist, saying, "Oh, so you care what the guys think? Hmn, I think I just saw Ashley around the corner, I wonder what he’ll think?” “Don’t you dare,” Andy warned. I slowly started walking backwards. “And, what if I do dare?” I joked. Andy stepped forward, making it clear that he knew what I was up to. He told me matter of factly, “I’ll make you regret it.” I swiveled around with ease and ran to the rest of the guys. As planned, I was in the middle of the guy’s little circle and Andy caught me. "Come here, you little shit,” his tone of voice not matching his anger. "Come on petit ouers,” I joked. "You mother-” he started. “Petit Ouers,” Ashley repeated. "Awe,” Jake said. “Are you a little bear?” The guys laughed at Jake’s joke as Andy went red in the face. “Hah!” I yelled. “ Your plan has failed.” “That’s it,” he said. “Time for revenge.” He threw me on the signing table and started tickling me furiously. “Please, Andy,” I laughed. “Please stop, it hurts. My sides, haha.” Tears formed in my eyes from the laughter. My sides began to hurt. “What did I say?!” I heard Anna yell. “I said you don’t run away, and what do you do? You run away.” I couldn’t respond from the laughing fit Andy was currently giving me, but soon Anna got in and helped. Luckily, I knew of a way to stop laughing. ‘Thank you, YouTube,’ I thought. To stop my laughing, I rubbed the roof of my mouth with my tongue and made my foot go numb. My laughing immediately ceased to be in the world. “Awe,” Ashley solemnly said. “Her laugh was cute, why’d you stop?” “We didn’t,” Andy told him. "Thank you, YouTube,” I yelled to the world. “Goddamn, Annie,” Anna said agitated. “You and your freaking YouTube.” “If you like it so much, why don’t you marry it?” Jake joked, though no one laughed but him. “Come on, guys, that’s comedy gold, right there.” “More like: Comedy Silver,” I stated coldly. Everyone went, “Oooooh,” except Jake, who stood at the opposite end of the signing table with eyes of disbelief. “I did not just get roasted by a fourteen year old,” he said. “I am not fourteen,” I said, vaguely offended. “I’m eighteen.” "Bless,” CC, their drummer, said. “Girl, you need to eat something.” "Boy,” I told CC. “I eat poptarts and coffee on a daily basis, calm yourself down.” "I could feel your ribcage,” Andy retaliated. “Because I exercise and take good care of my body?” I asked "Just eat something,” Andy pleaded.“Please?” I sighed and went to the break room, grabbing a banana and walking back out. I peeled it and took a huge bit out of it. “Wee I ath a bahnahnah,” I said with my mouth full. “Okay, we did not need to see the innards of the bahnahnah,” Jake regained his humor. "Whatever,” I said, swallowing the rest of the banana. Mike came in from his office and told us to “get the hell back to work.” Me and Anna sat behind the counter, where surprisingly no customers were in. We goofed around, playing with the small toys at the front counter. “Where were you?” asked Anna. “Sick,” I replied. “You’re always getting sick,” she said. "Yeah, because having pneumonia is always fun,” I said sarcastically. "Oh my god,” her jaw dropped. “You could have died.” “It felt like it,” saying it wasn’t a complete lie. “I had to share this room with an angsty teenager, and he would not shut up.” "Ugh, I hate it when people are always complaining about how they’re in so much pain, and they can’t stand it,” Ann mocked. “It’s just so nerve wracking, you’re not actually dying, get over it.” “I was so tempted to say that, but he was actually kind of cute.” “Oh, please,” she rolled her eyes. “Even if he was cute, you would still kick him out.” “Nah,” I said. “You have not seen this guy, and this guy always had his shirt off.” “Girls love girls, and boys,” she sang. “Do you want to play that?” I asked. We were allowed to put on our own music if it’s what our target audience is. I walked towards the back where the storage is and plugged my mp3 player in that I keep at the store. I scrolled through my playlist and pushed play when I came across girls/girls/boys by Panic! at the disco. I came back from the storage space and got a surprise attack from Andy. “Shine a light,” I censored, as we’re not allowed to swear in the workplace. “Got ya,” Andy yelled in victory. “Revenge is so sweet.” “Yeah,” I agree sarcastically. “Thanks for the heart attack.” My heart, still beating a million miles an hour, started doing flips and tricks. I began to feel sick, so, I excused myself to go back to work. I got back to work. I got back to Anna and told her I needed the bathroom, which wasn’t a lie, like I told Andy. In the bathroom, I sat on the floor of the big stall, away from the door, and gripped my head. I tried to calm down, breathing in and out in a long wave of patterns. My heartbeat began to slow down, I slowly stood up in a hunched position and bent over the toilet, throwing up the banana I just ate. I flushed it down, proceeding to wash my hands and go back to work. I got back behind the counter with Anna and she asked, “What happened?” "Andy scared the crap out of me,” I said. “I didn’t feel well after. I think I ate a bad banana.” Anna laughed. “Bad, banana, bad,” she said, slightly laughing and pointing at my stomach. I pushed her arm a bit and leaned back, laughing at what she said. “Oh, sweet, precious child,” I told her, placing my hands on her head to bring it down to kiss her forehead. She laughed at me, and I started laughing at her laughing hysterically from giggling all of about five minutes, none stop, we tried to stop but ended up giggling even more. A customer walked in and we stopping giggling almost immediately. I looked at her seriously, causing her to laugh again, but was put to the side, when the lady who walked in a second ago screamed. 'Oh, yeah,’ I thought. ‘Andy’s band is still here.’ “Hey, Ann,” I called out. “Yeah,” she replied. "When’s their signing?” I asked. She knitted her eyebrows together, also forgetting Andy was here with the band. "Oh, yeah, I think they’re just here to hang out. Andy only lives about five minutes away from my house.” “Wait, what?” “Oh, yeah, that means that you two live really close, don’t you?” she jumped on the counter. "Well, I guess so,” I said sarcastically. “It’s not like I just found out, my old childhood friend lives two blocks away from me.” Ann looked at me like she wasn’t expecting me to not freak out, with eyes wide open. “ . . . I can’t believe that I’ve been passing his house, every single day for the past year, without realizing it. I want to punch myself.” Anna giggled and said, “You know you should ask him for his phone number, so you don’t lose touch again.” “Why? I’m going to be touring with him for two months,” I told her nonchalantly. “What?!” she yelled as Andy started walking towards us. “You leave me for three weeks, now you’re leaving me for almost three months?!” "Three weeks? Three months?” Andy asked, very confused. “What is going on?” “I know,” Ann agreed with him. “What is going on?” "I was was sick with pneumonia for three weeks was in the hospital,” I lied for the third time. "What?” Andy said, shocked, with raised eyebrows. "Now, I’m going on Warped Tour as a YouTuber,” I finished. “What?!” Anna and Andy said in unision. "What?” I asked them. “Oh, and Anna, I got your texts, you can stay in my apartment, besides I kind of need you there to take care of Spider.” She nodded but Andy now had his eyebrows knitted together. “Wait,” he said. “You still have that old fluffy cat, your brother got you before he went to jail?” "Yeah,” I answered. “Your brother went to jail?” Ann asked, as though this was new information to her, when it’s not. "Yes,” I told her. “I’ve told you this before.” "Oh,” she said sympathetically. “Sorry, I forgot.” “It’s fine,” I said. “If you need, I can help you get packed for your first tour,” Andy said, trying to get closer behind the counter as he could. “One,” I said to Andy. “I’ve been on Warped Tour last year. Second, I’ve already packed, you should always pack at least a week ahead if you’re going on tour.” “Oh,” he said, disappointed. “I can still come over and help you with stuff, I’m not completely useless.” "We never said you were useless,” Tessa said for me. “Either way,” he continued. “It would be nice to catch up. Juliet won’t be home for another five hours.” I looked at the clock on my phone and saw that it was already two thirty. “Seriously? Getting home at seven thirty? I’d die if I didn’t have coffee.” “Still high strung on coffee, I see?” Andy said. “Still the same old Bella.” “Bella?” Anna asked. “Yes, that was the name I went by in highschool,” I told her. “How did you get Annie from Bella?” she inquired. “So confused,” Andy said. “Oh, shut up,” I told Andy, then turned around to Anna and answered, “My full name is Anniebella.” “Was your mom high when she gave you the name?” She asked, dead serious. "Probably,” I said. “Well, I have to get out of here at three, so you two losers have to fend for yourselves,” Anna said as she walked toward the punch machine and clocked out. “See yahs,” she yelled as she walked out the door fifteen minutes early. “Dork,”I yelled back at her. "So,” Andy started. “When do you get off?” “Five,” I said solemnly. “Eew,” he read my mind. “Yeah,but that just means I can goof off in the back if this customer decides to buy something.” He gave a small chuckle, “I still remember the day when you called me an idiot in french, on stage.” I groaned. “In the middle of a performance, in front of all the school,” he laughed. "Why’d you bring up such a cringey memory,” I compained. “You know,” he said. “I think I still have that dvd.” "Why do you still have it?” I asked surprised. “It’s such a piece of crap.” “No,” he defended. “It’s not, it’s probably the best performance you’ve done.” "No,” I whined, bring my knees to my chest, hiding my face. “I hated it, it’s so bad.” “Do you remember the way you styled your hair?” "Yes, now please, don’t bring up any more cringey high school memories.” “You were so tiny and cute!” He said in his high pitched, annoying voice. “You’re pushing it, Biersack,” I warned. "What?” he defended. “All I was saying, was that you were cute.” “What? Am I not cute anymore?” I joked. "No,” he hesitated. “I wasn’t saying that at all.” “Then why’d you hesitate?” I procured. "I,” he started, but then took a pause. “I’m just saying, you’re a bit unhealthy.” "So, now you’re calling me fat?” I asked. “No, of course not. If anything you’re very underweight. Like I said earlier, I could feel your ribcage.” “And like I said, I eat right, and exercise right. So, what about me is so unhealthy?” I asked, now getting angry. “Nothing,” he said, obviously not wanting tensions to rise. “Forget I said anything. I just don’t want our reconnection to go up in flames.” "Alright,” I consented. “So, how is Juliet?” “She’s fine,” he said. “Well, probably not right now, her manager’s being a huge dick.”“Eew,” I said. “I sadly know that feeling though. My old boss, back at Delhi wasn’t the kindest of people.” “Where was that?” he asked. "There was a new store called Vegas Pizza’s that opened up and I was one of the unlucky people who got in,” I sighed. “Unlucky?” he said. "Yeah,” assured him. “Turned out he was a massive pervert, thank god it didn’t happen to me.” "Damn,” he said. “So, besides working with a molester, what else have you been up to? You said you were, sorry, are a Youtuber?” "Yeah, it’s mostly a vlog, nothing special.” “Really? Sounds cool, do you mind if I be in a video?” he asked. “Nah, you’re cool. It’s not a sponsor deal, alright. Just two old friends,” I told him. “Right, yeah,” he agreed. “So, what about you? Are you still doing the modeling job?” I wanted to know. “Yeah, but with the band it’s more of a summer side job, though, it’s getting really boring. They make me wear the clothes just different colors and patterns. I might switch companies soon,” he complained. “Sounds boring,” I said. “ I mean if I were in your shoes, and I know that this is being devious, but I’d expose them. Again, just me.” “That sounds like overkill,” he stated. "That’s just me, though.” There was a long silence before the customer came over and put a lot of things on the counter, then asked, “Excuse me, but my daughter wants this shirt for her birthday, I can’t quite pronounce his name, is it Frank eero?” “Yes,” I said politely. “Frank Iero’s new shirt is in, follow me, ma’am. . . . Here it is.” "That’s perfect, thank you,” the lady said. "It’s not a problem ma’am,” I responded like a robot. “I suppose it’s your daughter’s birthday?” "Yes, it’s her sixteenth, I want her sweet to be perfect for her and her friends,” she replied. "She has good, taste in music,” I said as I scanned the items in. “I honestly,” the lady began. “I don’t know how she can listen to it. It’s just a bunch of screaming and noise.” I turned around and grabbed the new Black Veil Brides CD off the shelf, taking the album lyrics out of the front cover, and handed it to the lady. “If you read the lyrics, they’re actually quite meaningful.” I quoted Never Give In from their first album, earning an eyebrow raise from Andy. "Wow, I’d never thought I’d see the day, when screaming actually had meaning to it. Thank you,” she said. “Can I get a copy of this CD?” "Of course,” I said and walked over to the CD shelves, grabbing one and coming back to my station. “Alright, your total is sixty-two, fifty-three,” "Thank you,” the lady said. "No, thank you, have a nice day, ma’am,” I replied. There was another long wave of silence as the lady left, before Andy said, “You sweet talker,” he complemented. "What?” I laughed at him. “I never would have thought that you of all people would memorize the lyrics to my band’s songs,” he smiled in delight. “Come here,” he said as he held out his arms in a hugging motion. "No,” I declined. “I gave you a good long hug just a couple of hours ago, that’s enough affection out of me for a good month.” "Please,”he said. “I don’t wanna," I told him "But, I want a hug,” Andy whinned. "No,” I argued. "Yes,” he said. We went back and forth saying yes and no to each other for a good five minutes until Ashley came over and to tell us, “Just freaking hug, already, we’re tired of hearing you two whine. Any ways, me and the rest of the guys are going out to find a bar, are you coming?” "Nah,” Andy said. “I’m going to catch up Bella, here.” “Aww,” I said. “That’s so sweet.” I went in for the hug, and wrapped my arms around his waist. “I have never understood you,” Andy said. "Nor will I ever understand you.” “Don’t worry,” I assured him. “Neither will I.” We started laughing as Ashley stood there facepalming. “Alright, I’ll text you when we’re hungover.” Andy laughed at him, saying, “Alright, man, don’t drive, then.” "Yes, mom,” Ashley added. “Bye, love birds.” I rolled my eyes as Andy said, “I’m engaged, dumbass.” "Yeah, and we all know what happens when you say that,” Ashley laughed. “What?” I asked, knitting my eyebrows. "It’s an inside joke,” Andy said. Still hugging, Andy waved the guys goodbye, and whispered to me, “CC told me you’re hot.” I craned my neck upward to look at his face, and he was dead serious and I cringed. Then I looked at the clock, five o’ five. "Oooo,” I gleamed. “Quitting time.” "YouTube?” Andy said. "Fine,” I sighed. "Yes,” he beamed. I walked over to the storage area and unplugged my old mp3 player. ‘I am definitely sick of Panic! at the disco now,’ I thought as I made my way back with my skate board. I clocked out and told Mike it’s closing time. Shocked, but still thankful, he said goodbye. "Alright,” I said to Andy. “Let’s go.” I saw Andy do a short little happy dance in the corner of my eye. Smirking as I grabbed my phone from under the counter, along with my purse and keys. Me and Andy made our way to my apartment, as we made very little small talk. "Hey,” Andy called for me suddenly. “We just passed my house.” "Really?” I said. “I never knew I was walking past your house every day.” "Me neither."

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rorykillmore · 7 years

Text

alright the product of late night bad decisions

an lp crackfic, as promised, for @ravenswood

i want walter sullivan dead.

“When it came down to it, modern technology was progressive enough to become easy to follow once you grasped a core concept. A movie was a book or play or opera brought to life. A video game was a sort of interactive movie -- one in which the player took control of the main character and was tasked with keeping them alive.

It didn’t seem such a profound concept that Lucille imagined it was worth being paid much to play one, but here they were.

“Lucille ought to like this one,” Thomas had reported (with suspicious cheer) after they’d sent him off to buy what Edith described as ‘literally anything that looks easy’. He’d held up a package with rather disturbing cover art, flashing the label Silent Hill 4: The Room, and that had been that.

Lucille had not, in fact, appreciated it.

“You’re going first,” she told Edith, all but tossing the controller at her as the game booted up.

“Lucille!” Edith reprimanded her, barely managing to snatch it out of the air before it hit the ground. “We’re meant to be watching the opening scene so we know what’s going on.”

The ‘opening scene’, as Edith had generously called it, were a few paragraphs of words fading in and out on the screen. From what Lucille could gather, they described a series of strange dreams the protagonist had been having over the course of five nights.

One other thing... he couldn’t leave Room 302.

“They might have led with that,” Lucille pointed out sullenly.

Edith furrowed her brow at the television. “He’s been trapped in his apartment for five nights? One has to wonder what he’s been doing, in all that time.”

“Something useless, no doubt.” Lucille was already convinced the protagonist wasn’t worth their time, and idly wondered whether they would be permitted to take control of another character if he died.

Well. They would find out soon enough, she expected.

The camera settled on a shot of a gray wall and completely unremarkable door.

Edith and Lucille started at expectantly for a few moments.

Nothing happened.

“Oh --” Edith took up the controller again. “I... suppose we’re supposed to be playing.”

“That was abrupt,” Lucille observed, and so they began.

The second greatest hurdle after mastering the controls (a long and tedious process for both of them, demonstrated in part by Edith’s struggle to figure out how to open the first door and Lucille’s later inability to steer their character out of a corner) was figuring out exactly what the objective of the game was.

“We’ve spent nearly an hour searching this apartment.” Edith was beginning to sound as though part of her soul was draining from her body. “There’s no way to open the front door. We’ve checked everything.”

“Perhaps that’s the point,” Lucille suggested from where she sat, rubbing her temples and nearly nursing a migraine. “It’s called ‘The Room’, Edith. That’s all there is.”

She completely failed to see what any of this had to do with Silent Hill.

“It can’t be,” Edith despaired. “What would be the point of a game that consisted solely of exploring a tiny, locked apartment room?”

What’s the point of anything anymore, Lucille wanted to shoot back at her. Instead, she offered, “I’ve heard these sorts of things rot children's’ brains. Now we know why.”

In response, Edith moved Henry around the room in another fruitless circle.

“Try that door,” Lucille suggested.

“Which -- that one?”

“That -- nevermind, that’s the bedroom.”

“...No, the one across from it is the bedroom.”

They paused, glancing at each other reluctantly.

“They look nearly identical, though,” Edith added a touch more defensively.

The reality remained: an hour and six minutes into their game, and they had completely missed the existence of the apartment’s bathroom.

The hole near the sink inexplicably led them into some kind of subway system. Lucille still didn’t see how Silent Hill played into anything.

The first weapon Henry acquired was a steel pipe, and she (by that point, reluctantly in charge of the controller) immediately tried using it on the first human being they encountered.

( “I thought she was an enemy,” she explained carelessly to a perturbed Edith as the character introduced herself as ‘Cynthia’).

When the first monster did actually show itself - a grotesque, oddly colored dog that inexplicably made cat noises - Henry died almost immediately.

“Efficient,” Edith remarked smugly.

Lucille shot her a look. “It isn’t my fault that these controls are next to unusable.” In any case, at least now they were free. This had been an... interesting experience, to say the least. Enlightening. But Lucille’d had about enough of it, and was more than willing to see Henry’s story come to an end.

And then the game faded back in, at a slightly earlier location, and he was alive again.

Edith blinked. “How -- ?”

“That’s not possible,” Lucille decided flatly.

“Well, evidently --” in place of a rational explanation, Edith gave a helpless sort of shrug. “You have another chance.”

Either Henry was some kind of immortal being, or this was commonplace for video games -- a completely immersion-breaking element that ruined any sense of reality that might have otherwise been grasped.

In Lucille’s opinion, it took most of the fun out of things, as well.

Edith was in control when they encountered their first ghost.

Lucille immediately took the opportunity to snark: “It’s a good thing we have an expert at the wheel.”

Admittedly, Edith wasted no time -- by that point, she’d become passable efficient with the control system (stunted as it was) and proceeded to beat the ghost over its head with the steel pipe until it crumpled to the ground.

“There, you see?” she told Lucille briskly. “They’re not any more difficult than those dogs.”

Henry had taken about four steps when the ghost got back up.

If Edith had disliked spirits prior to playing this, Lucille reflected, this game wasn’t likely to improve her opinion.

Things decidedly began to go down hill once they managed to recruit Eileen.

Lucille, for one, couldn’t fathom how anyone would agree to accompany a neighbor who made a habit of spying on them through a peephole in his room, but she quickly came to realize that this was the least of Eileen’s problems.

“My god,” she complained once she had painstakingly cleared a hallway full of sentient wheelchairs (inexplicable) only to find Eileen still at the other end of it, moving at a light jog. “She’s so slow.”

“She’s injured,” Edith protested exasperatedly.

“She has a broken arm. You moved faster when you had a broken leg.”

Eager to get the ordeal over with (and certain that they were nearing the end, now), Edith held out a hand. “Here. Just let me do it.”

Her efforts, however, proved to be equally as strained -- if anything, Eileen lagged behind Henry this time at an even slower pace, to the point where Edith had to return to the previous room to fetch her.

“Come on, Eileen,” she murmured under her breath, and Lucille had to repress a smile at her own, private little joke.

“Just hand her a weapon,” she suggested in response. “At least then she’ll be able to defend herself. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“So let me get this straight,” Edith began slowly.

Lucille held her head in her hands, only half listening, wanting to deny the existence of the unspeakably cursed piece of media in front of them.

“His motivation is that he... thinks the apartment room... is his mother.”

Many grueling hours had passed. Edith looked disconcertingly haunted. Lucille, who’d had many experiences in her life which she could have potentially described as “glimpsing the very depths of hell”, was now certain she had.

“After all this,” she gritted, thinking no amount of money could ever have been enough. “The ending had better be vindicating, at the very least. I want Walter Sullivan dead.”

“Well,” Edith said in a rather strained tone, with no energy left to even pretend to disagree. “I imagine there are only two ways this fight can end.”

Lucille stared Walter’s greasy, badly rendered face down grimly. In truth, after all this time, she still didn’t even entirely understand what he’d been trying to accomplish -- but his tediously murderous antics had inspired an undeniable spark of hatred in her heart.

“It seems simple enough,” Edith went on, making some exhausted effort to sound encouraging. “All we have to do is beat him before Eileen reaches the pit, from the look of things.”

Lucille eyed Eileen’s tattered, bruised, bleeding form and reflected that she couldn’t possibly be capable of moving very quickly, at this point. Particularly considering how slowly she’d moved during the entire goddamn game.

“Simple,” she echoed, unpausing. “Let’s hope so.”

Walter loped towards Henry with his pistol in hand, and Eileen ran for the pit at a speed that could only be described as breakneck.

#THEY GOT THE FUCKING BAD ENDING #OF COURSE #idek what this is but i hope you enjoy it #in which edith and lucille are fucking terrible at video games and they play one of the most difficult ones #fic

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singledarkshade · 5 years

Text

Burning

Part Two – Flames Of Change Beeping around him was the first thing Rip became aware of. Groaning he forced his eyes open finding Alex looking down on him concern in her eyes.

“Here,” she placed a straw to his lips allowing him to sip some water.

“Thank you,” Rip murmured, “What happened? Where’s Gideon?”

Alex pulled a chair over beside him and took a seat at his side, “Gideon is sleeping in the room next to you.”

“Is she okay?” he demanded, trying to get his brain working again.

Alex bit her lip, “She’s resting. There’s some things I need to tell you but, before I do, I need you to tell me what you remember about last night.”

Letting out a sigh Rip frowned in thought finally saying, “I finished working on the power source quite late and went home. Gideon was lying on the couch, she wasn’t feeling well.”

“And then?” Alex asked looking extremely uncomfortable having this conversation.

Rip grimaced, his brain was filled with fog, “I was going to call you for help but she wouldn’t let me leave.”

He paused and Alex offered him some more water which Rip took thankfully.

“I don’t really remember what happened,” Rip grimaced, “I remember heat. It was warm, Gideon was burning up, her lips...” he trailed off his eyes widening in shock the memory hit him, “Oh God, what did I do?”

“Calm down,” Alex told him, “I needed you to remember before I told you what’s happening.”

He covered his eyes with his hands, “Tell me it’s not real and I didn’t...”

“Rip, I need you to focus,” Alex said softly, “Yesterday Gideon and I were studying the ship that was brought in. We’ve now discovered there was an alien trapped in it. Have you ever heard of Blazners?”

Rip shook his head.

“J’onn has confirmed they are a benign people,” Alex assured him, “Unless directly threatened. They help create a natural balance within the universe.”

“What does this have to do with anything?”

“The Blazner we’ve discovered was pregnant but dying,” Alex continued slowly, “The mother needed a host to protect the child until it’s ready to be born. She chose Gideon as the surrogate.”

“What?”

Alex held up her hand to calm him, “There’s more.”

“What else can there be after Gideon has an alien parasite feeding off her?” Rip demanded angrily.

“The Blazner is the reason you and Gideon,” she winced before finishing, “Slept together. In very basic terms Gideon is pregnant and the child needed a father, someone who will protect both above all others. It created a psychic and physiological bond between you and Gideon. That’s why you were exhausted this morning and why it took some time for you to remember. The bonding, to use J’onn’s term, consumed all your energy.”

Rip sat at Gideon’s side holding her hand waiting for her to wake up. Guilt was gnawing at him for what had happened, what he’d done the night before but he needed to make sure she was alright.

A soft sigh came from Gideon letting him know she was waking up.

“Hey,” Rip breathed, “You’re okay. You’re safe.”

“Captain?” she sighed, her eyes fluttering open.

Relief filled him, “How do you feel?”

“Strange,” Gideon breathed softly, “And cold.”

“What do you remember about yesterday?” Rip asked gently, fixing the blankets around her tighter before sliding his fingers through her hair comforting.

She let out another soft sigh as she tried to think back, “I was helping Alex and…” she trailed off for a few moments, “I remember heat. I became so warm and felt tired so I went home.”

“Then?” Rip asked, not wanting her to remember because he didn’t want to lose her but he knew he had no choice.

A smile touched her lips, “You came home and…” she trailed off her cheeks flushing suddenly,

“I am so sorry, Gideon,” he whispered, “I shouldn’t have let…”

He was cut off when Gideon kissed him, Rip knew he should end it the moment it started but couldn’t. He couldn’t help but give in to Gideon’s soft lips and gentle caresses. When they broke apart he let out a soft breath, seeing Gideon smile at him.

“It happened because I wanted to be with you,” she told him, “I have always wanted you, Rip. Please tell me that you want the same.”

“I do, Gideon,” he whispered, “But you deserve so much better than me.”

She rolled her eyes at him, “But I want you, Rip. And you know I usually get what I want. Why do you think you were given the Waverider in the first place?”

“Gideon…”

“I wanted you then,” Gideon told him, “And I want you now.”

Rip rested his forehead against hers, “I want you too. I’m sorry I’ve never told you before but I was…after losing Miranda I didn’t know if I could dare love anyone again. Even you.”

“And now?” she whispered.

Taking a deep breath Rip told her, “I love you.”

Gideon smiled at him, “I love you too, my dear Captain.”

Rip kissed her before sighing, “There’s more to tell you.”

“As long as you are with me,” she breathed, “Nothing is so terrible.”

Hoping she still thought that once he explained Rip proceeded to give her the details of their current predicament.

Alex took the seat beside Gideon’s bed as the other woman stared at the ultrasound video she had playing on a loop. Watching the small alien child that was growing inside her.

“You know it’s not going to change,” Alex noted, checking the readouts beside the bed, “No matter how often you watch it.”

Gideon shook her head, “It is something I never expected, even now being human.”

“J’onn assures us that the baby will not harm you at all. I’m sorry this is not the way it should happen,” Alex took her hand, “On the bright side Rip is not being an idiot anymore and admitting how he feels for you.”

A shy smile touched Gideon’s lips making Alex laugh.

“And I’ve known how you’ve felt for him from the moment he arrived,” Alex said, squeezing Gideon’s hand she added, “Before he arrived actually.”

Taking a breath Gideon nodded decisively, “It will be an experience. One that I want to have and enjoy.”

Alex chuckled, “That’s the right attitude.”

“But can you turn the heat up,” Gideon sighed, “Please.”

With a frown Alex checked the readouts again, “The temperature is the same as it always is.”

Gideon shook her head, “I feel cold.”

Alex grimaced, “I’ve raised the temperature a little. How does that feel?”

After a few moments Gideon nodded, “Slightly better.”

It took several more tries to find a comfortable temperature for Gideon by which time Alex was getting worried and Gideon was yawning.

“Your body is adjusting to it’s new situation so we’ll have to run some tests. But those can wait,” Alex told her, “I want you to get some sleep. Okay?”

Gideon nodded, her eyes already closing and she was soon sleeping.

*********************************************

Rip opened the door to the apartment finding Alex standing there, “Welcome to the sauna.”

He saw Alex let out a breath of astonishment at the heat hitting her before frowning at the amused look she gave him.

“You own shorts?” she chuckled.

Rip rolled his eyes, letting her in the apartment, “Try living here then you can mock my clothing.”

Alex chuckled, “Where’s Gideon?”

“Kitchen, having something to eat,” Rip replied, “Her appetite has grown considerably since…”

“She’s now pregnant,” Alex said bluntly, “Rip, you’re going to have to say it eventually.”

Shaking his head he led her to where Gideon was sitting reading a book on pregnancy while eating a bowl of fruit. Despite the unusual situation Gideon was positively glowing with happiness.

“Alex,” she smiled in greeting seeing her friend, “What are you doing here?”

“I have your test results,” Alex told her, “Thought you would want them straight away.”

Gideon put her book down and nodded, taking Rip’s hand when he sat at her side.

“Okay,” Alex grabbed the nearest seat, after removing her jacket wishing she was wearing a much lighter top, “You are perfectly healthy, Gideon. The child is healthy as well. However to accommodate the child’s physiology your body is now running a little warmer than before, which is why you need the heat.”

“A little warmer?” Rip laughed, wincing when Gideon elbowed him, “It’s sweltering in here. I sleep with no covers on because you radiate heat.”

Alex chuckled, “You’ve already noticed your appetite has increased, just make sure you eat healthily.”

“Rip is making sure of that already,” Gideon replied, her head resting against his shoulder.

“Chocolate cookies are not a breakfast food,” Rip reminded her with a fond smile, pulling her closer.

Alex smiled at them, “I know this this will drive you crazy, but you now have an appointment every Monday with the doctor to keep up with how you are. Anything happens then you need to tell us instantly. No pretending you’re fine when you’re not.”

“I believe that is Rip’s trick,” Gideon teased before nodding, “I promise, Alex.”

Gideon smiled as she and Rip walked along the streets, her arm through his enjoying the change to their relationship. It had only been a few days since Rip had told her how he felt and everything, so far, was going well despite the strange alien surrogate pregnancy.

“Are you sure you want to go out for lunch?” Rip asked, as they neared the small café. It was one he’d found during his first few weeks within this world when he would just walk.

Gideon smiled at his concern, “I am perfectly healthy, Rip. The doctors have confirmed this so lunch outside the apartment is allowed.”

“As long as you’re sure,” Rip said, smiling when she stopped them walking and stretched up to kiss him, “Okay, you’re sure.”

Starting them walking again Gideon enjoyed the warmth of the sun. Letting Rip take the lead to get them a table she took a deep breath of the flowers surrounding the entrance way. She had noticed that her sense of smell had increased considerably, not quite sure if it was due to the pregnancy or the fact it wasn’t a normal one.

“Gideon,” Rip brought her attention back to him taking her hand again to lead her to their table.

They ordered their meal and Gideon turned to her Captain thoughtfully.

“What?” Rip asked.

“Do you ever think about trying to return to our world?” she asked softly.

Rip shook his head, “Why would I?”

Gideon frowned slightly at his reply.

“I had nothing left there,” Rip reminded her, “Everything was taken by people I trusted. There is one person I wanted to know I’m okay and I sent her a message when I was working on the Phoenix.”

Intrigued, and slightly annoyed he’d never told her this before, Gideon asked, “Who?”

“Eve Baxter,” Rip shrugged, “She was the only person who understood how hard it was for me that you weren’t there while I built the Bureau. The only one who understood the pain our separation caused.”

Gideon reached out to take his hand, “You know I would have been with you…”

“I know,” he stopped her, “But Gideon, you’re here so there is nothing in that world for me.”

She nodded.

“Do you miss them?” Rip asked suddenly.

“Sometimes,” she confessed, “They may not have treated me the way you did but I do think of them sometimes.”

Rip sighed, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” she smiled, “I have you and back there, the way things were going, that was not going to happen again unless something dramatic changed. I have also made friends here with people I love and would never give up.”

Rip wrapped his arm around Gideon as they went for a walk after lunch.

“Before you say anything,” she spoke up as they strolled, “I am going back to work tomorrow. I am not sitting around the apartment for the next few months.”

He frowned but knew it was impossible to argue against her in this matter. “As long as you promise to take things easy and let any of us know if you’re not feeling well.”

“Of course, Captain,” she chuckled, smiling when he leaned in to kiss her.

“I hate to break this up,” an unknown voice said making them turn to find a man with a gun aimed at them, “So give me your money and you can go back to your moment.”

Rip instantly pushed Gideon behind him, frowning in annoyance that he had no weapons.

“Oh and I’ll take the necklace too,” the man said pointing his gun at Gideon whose hand instantly went to the pendant sitting at her throat.

Rip made a grab for the gun, catching the other man off guard but didn’t count on a second man who slammed into Rip’s back throwing him against the wall.

Seeing the gun suddenly aimed at Rip, Gideon let out a cry.

“No!!!” she screamed, flames erupting from her hands streaming towards their attackers.

The two men ran.

Gideon stared at her hands for a second before her knees buckled and she collapsed, Rip barely managing to catch her before she hit the ground.

“Okay,” he breathed, holding her close, “I think we’ve found something we might want to tell the others.”

#fic #legends of tomorrow #rip hunter #gideon #timeship #supergirl #alex danvers

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