#they both have to evolve and get accustomed to changing for the better to be a better friend

[starlyte-writes]

Sorry I know it’s been literal months but Hitting On 16 is still rotting away in my head-

Like it was SO good you guys I’m dying because we all took it as c!Wilbur’s arc right? And it was, BUT, it was also c!Ranboo’s arc. They both grew in such a dramatic healthy way from their friendship with the burger van and I can’t stop THINKING ABOUT IT!

By becoming friends with c!Ranboo, c!Wilbur learned to open up and trust somebody with blind faith and nothing more. Sure, at the beginning, he tested him to see how quickly he’d chicken out and abandon c!Wilbur, but pretty soon after he realized that wasn’t necessary and it was just c!Wilbur and c!Ranboo causing mischief to piss off c!Quackity.

One of my favorite things about c!Wilbur is how he acts the most like a friend when he’s not thinking about it. Giving c!Ranboo sweet nicknames, complimenting him, hyping him up, cheering him on, all these small things he doesn’t even think about because it’s just subconscious love for his friend. He becomes healthier with his bond with c!Ranboo and can actually chat and hang out without the constant fear of “being perceived as evil” taunting his mind.

And then there’s change on c!Ranboo’s end as well!! If you actually really truly think about it, being on c!Wilbur’s “side” of the burger arc was the first time he ever chose a side. Before then, c!Ranboo would do anything he could to help out all parties, even if they directly contrasted each other. He didn’t want to make anyone upset and would therefore make everyone upset by not being loyal to one specific group. Even with the cookie outpost, while he was primarily in c!Tubbo’s favor, he still tried to negotiate and more importantly get along with c!Quackity, which to his sadness didn’t work out.

But then in comes c!Wilbur, who is passionate and impulsive and paranoid and thinks nobody would ever willingly choose to stand by his side. And c!Ranboo wants to give him a chance, to prove that that thinking is wrong. And the only way to do that is to directly oppose c!Quackity.

So he does. c!Ranboo, no matter how risky or sketchy a plan c!Wilbur creates, always follows through. Even when it’s directly going against his good morals (like vandalizing the restaurant) or the people he cares about (like his own fucking husband!) And this isn’t because c!Wilbur manipulates him into following his every command, it’s because he cares about c!Wilbur!

While nervous at first, throughout their time together c!Ranboo genuinely begins to enjoy his company and following his crazy ideas. He goes along with him because he wants to keep an eye on his friend, or keep him happy, anything to prove to c!Wilbur that “I am hanging out with you because I want to, exactly what you thought no one could do.”

It’s through his friendship with c!Wilbur that c!Ranboo learns the values of dedicating to a specific side. Sure, it creates conflicts that are messy and not fun, but it’s worth it to fight for something you care about, which is exactly what he tells c!Tubbo! 

“For God’s sake, just give him a chance! I know that I haven’t always made the best decisions with who I trust but this time I swear to you that things may not always be as bad as you think! I mean, people change, people get better and if you never give them a chance to prove it you’ll be stuck hating everyone that has ever wronged you and you won’t have anyone left...”

He is directly opposing his husband to stand for what he believes in, which is c!Wilbur being a better person. And while I am convinced there is a little self-projecting going on in here that might’ve helped motivate him, it is in part because he believes in c!Wilbur.

The saddest part is that their own personal flaws outpower their friendship, which leads to their inevitable downfall. c!Ranboo is never able to outright express his feelings to another person despite them all expressing their feelings towards him, leading to him killing himself to make a point thinking that would hit c!Wilbur more clearly than just directly talking to him.

Then on c!Wilbur’s end, not having c!Ranboo clarify and reassure him that he did enjoy being friends with him, his self-hatred wins out and he convinces himself that c!Ranboo never wanted anything to do with him. That he was spending time with c!Wilbur against his own free will.

They both grew thanks to their friendship, but it wasn’t enough to fight against all of the other problems they both still need to work on. I just- THIS man- ARE YOU HEARING ME? HITTING ON 16 WAS THEIR STORY AGH!

#star's analysis #dream smp #hitting on 16 #wilbur soot #ranboo #c!wilbur #c!ranboo #c!burger boys #ho16 #dsmp lore #tw caps #tw cursing #tw suicide mention #obviously there was a lot of growing for c!quackity c!tubbo and c!tommy as well #but the biggest focus of this story was their friendship and how they changed with it #neither of them had ever dedicated to friendship like that #for c!wilbur you could say he has with c!tommy but that relationship is a lot more complex and different than his with c!ranboo #they both have to evolve and get accustomed to changing for the better to be a better friend #unfortunately too many other factors got in the way to allow them to finish growing #i seriously need c!ranboo to get revived and just slap c!wil in the face and go #'HEY' #'I LIKED BEING YOUR FRIEND' #'STOP THINKING I DIDN'T' #i care very deeply for burger boys if you haven't already guessed #long post #long tags #tw italics #man i missed analysis i sound fucking bonkers it's great #star rants

[wannaeatramyeon]

Haii haii! the last one you wrote was soo goooodddd, Imma have request a seongtaehoon x reader but them being kid (elemetary kids) and taehoon having a crush on her lolololol (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~

Oof, thanks for the ask anon and reading! My Taehoon inspo (and general inspo tbh) was seeeeriously dwindling, so thanks for kickstarting it.

Seong Taehoon x Reader: Through the years

Elementary School to High School - your relationship through the years

It starts with you in pigtails, and a harsh yank. Taehoon, at a tender young age, already exhibiting interest in others through aggressive behaviour.

The teacher intervenes.

Taehoon apologises, face a picture of innocence, as if butter wouldn't melt. The next day, he pushes you over. He's a quick learner, knowing to avoid other's watchful eyes to stay out of trouble.

So it continues.

Little balled up pieces of paper hit you in the back of your head during class, small shoves during break, rough shoulder bumps in the corridors.

It escalates to another boy joining in.

The first time he makes you cry, the contents of your backpack spilling across the floor, knees scraped and bleeding, big fat tears rolling down your face - Taehoon kicks him square in the stomach.

They're both suspended.

On their return, the other boy leaves you alone. Taehoon doesn't.

The words have as much bite as before, the pushes just as aggressive, yet now there's an odd comfort.

.

.

Things don't change much through Middle School. You do though, and so does Taehoon.

You both start to grow into your bodies, the early effects of puberty taking hold.

Hormones run wild and other classmates start to take notice of both your appearances.

Anyone interested in you results in them inevitably getting kicked. Anyone interested in Taehoon is ignored. Rumours swirl, but neither of you take notice.

Taehoon is still as physical as ever, though now there is an awkwardness that wasn't there before. He isn't as carefree. He averts his gaze when you turn around to glare at him, and the jostling leaves Taehoon as red-faced as you.

.

.

Then Dowoon happens, and Taehoon isn't seen for weeks on end.

You're not sure what compels you to visit his Taekwondo studio, maybe you've become accustomed to his presence through bullying and harassment.

Seong Hansu greets you. You exchange pleasantries and start to attend his lesson regularly in the hopes of seeing Taehoon again.

Another few weeks pass before you hear "What the fuck are you doing here?"

You would recognise that voice anywhere. To your surprise, it makes you smile.

In the early days, he treats your attendance with narrowed eyes and suspicion. He ignores your concerned glances and attempts at conversation.

Eventually, it gets better.

.

.

Taehoon's MMA loss leads to you both sitting quietly on a park bench.

He doesn't say a word for hours, and neither do you.

Instead, you pull a can of beer from your bag. Taehoon raises his eyebrows in surprise, not thinking you had it in you for any underaged drinking.

It pops open with a refreshing hiss and you take the first sip. You pass it to Taehoon and he follows your lead.

The sunset could be beautiful, the birds chirping could be melodic, this could almost be romantic. But you feel Taehoon's despondency like it's an extension of your own self.

You continue to sit with him long after the beer is drained.

.

.

Your relationship morphs and blossoms.

The shoulder bumps are friendlier, the hair tugs are with affection. It evolves to an occasional arm slung around your shoulder, hand grabbing you by the wrist and dragging you to the arcade, headlocks when you're irritating him, careful touches when he patches you up after sparring.

His eyes are gentle and tender when he looks at you, even if he wears a scowl.

You're the first person he thinks to call or message if anything happens.

He spends almost every spare moment with you.

You're his best friend.

.

.

High School begins, and Taehoon gets ever cockier and confident.

But there are strange developments afoot.

The casual touches continue and you are left flustered. He still likes to throw things at you in class, but when you now give him a dirty look, his returning smirk leaves your heart pounding.

You're too worried about messing up what you have, not even sure if Taehoon returns your affection. You daydream about taking the next step, but you don't know how to proceed.

.

.

Taehoon finds himself pinned beneath you.

It's not often anymore you manage to gain the upperhand when sparring together. He's a prodigy afterall, and not to mention 6ft 2 of pure muscle.

Of course you take this rare opportunity to gloat, who wouldn't? All the while, Taehoon just stares at you with an odd glint in his eye.

"Go out with me."

Huh? You think you mishear but he repeats himself. The words ring as clear as day.

"Go out with me."

"W-what?"

"I like you, and I know you like me too," Taehoon smiles smugly at you. Even in his compromising position, under his piercing gaze, it feels like you're the one immobilised.

You've already played out this scenario a million times in your head but you never thought it would happen. The seconds drag as you look on in shock.

"Is this a no?" Taehoon's words pulls you back to him. He doesn't look annoyed at the idea of rejection. In fact, he looks just as arrogant as ever. As if he knew that there isn't a chance in hell you would turn him down.

"It's not a no," you hesitate, "but what if this ruins our friendship?"

Taehoon's smile widens, "I never liked you anyway."

This time he doesn't pull your hair. He gently cups the back of your head and brings your lips to his.

#taehoon seong #taehoon x reader #viral hit #viral hit manhwa #viral hit x reader #viral hit webtoon #viral hit headcanons #how to fight #how to fight manhwa #how to fight webtoon #how to fight headcanons #seong taehoon x reader #seong taehoon #seong taehun #seong taehun x reader #taehun seong #taehun seong x reader #wannaeatramyeon

[idkyetxoxo]

Two | Vagabond | The Last Kingdom

"I have seen what the future will hold for you, it is the least I can do,"

─── ✦⋅ ☆⋅✦ ───

We arrived at a village-like settlement after what felt like hours, and as I took in my surroundings, the contrast to everything familiar struck me. It was a scene from the distant past, an ancient world that stood in stark opposition to the memories etched in my mind.

As we rode into Winchester, the inhabitants gawked at me as if I were an alien, an outsider thrust into their midst. It wasn't entirely untrue, I did feel like a foreigner in this strange realm.

I dismounted the horse with little grace, barely managing to land on my feet. My ass felt sore, prompting me to twist awkwardly in an attempt to crack my back.

"Go get her new clothes, she's attracting more attention than required," Uhtred directed Iseult, slipping some coins into her hand before heading off in a different direction. Iseult gently took my arm, leading me away with a reassuring smile.

"This will get better," she said softly "and how would you know that?" I snapped, immediately regretting my outburst. Despite my lapse, she had been nothing but kind "I just do," she replied, and her words did little to soothe my anxious heart.

Iseult handed me a red dress, instructing me to change once we were indoors. Shrugging off my gold dress, I slipped into the long, modest garment. The top half clung snugly to my body, and the sleeves cascaded off my shoulders, while the flowing bottom added a touch of modesty. 

Brown leather shoes followed, replacing the Versace heels that now seemed like a distant memory. As I carefully folded my prized possession, I couldn't help but feel a pang of loss.

It all felt like a dream, something that wasn't meant to be happening.

Gently, Iseult took the folded dress from me, promising to keep it safe. She instructed me to sit and braided my hair into a single plait throwing it over my shoulder and wiping off the remnants of makeup from my face acknowledging the stark contrast to the cosmetics I would never find in this era.

"Now you look like one of us" she whispered, and I stole a glance into a polished silver platter to behold my altered appearance. "So boring," I muttered under my breath.

Returning outside, we settled on a bench as the sky began to darken. A woman brought us a jug of liquid and cups. I eyed the unfamiliar drink with scepticism as Uhtred and another man joined us.

"Who is this?" the man asked, and I hesitated, glancing between Iseult and Uhtred. "What, she doesn't speak?" he teased, and I cleared my throat rolling my eyes. "I do," I asserted, earning a smirk from the man.

Uhtred explained my origin and identity to the man in a simplified version, prompting me to question the earlier directive to keep my origins secret. "I thought I was told to keep my mouth shut" I said with a firm tone crossing my arms as the men laughed but I didn't find it funny at all.

"Leofric can be trusted," Uhtred assured, pouring the liquid into cups. "What is it?" I asked smelling the contents of the cup and scrunching my nose in disgust. "Ale" Uhtred replied drinking from his cup. "Ale," I muttered swirling the liquid around, Iseult chuckled as I took a sip, squirming at the unfamiliar taste. 

"Thank god our alcohol taste evolves," I muttered, watching the rest of them drink happily, already accustomed to the taste.

Throughout the night, they patiently and some impatiently answered my barrage of questions, unravelling the intricate tapestry of their world, the terminology, language, place names, and everything in between. 

As my understanding slowly expanded, despite not wanting to I found myself entranced by the complexity of their customs.

"So, you two will fight to the death tomorrow over something that happened in Cornwall, sorry Cornwalum?" I inquired, bewildered "And now you're sharing a drink like the best of friends." Both men nodded in agreement like it was a daily occurrence for them.

"You people are strange," I remarked, sipping the ale and gradually acquiring a taste for it.

"So, what do you say you give this man his last night with a woman before I kill him tomorrow?" Uhtred suggested, earning a disapproving glare from me. "I'm not...engaging with anyone," I declared and Leofric raised an eyebrow.

"I have a boyfriend," I added, met with a sea of perplexed expressions from the group. "I am spoken for, I have a man," I reiterated attempting to find a version they would understand, my uncertainty palpable as Leofric grumbled and Uhtred chuckled in response.

"I suggest you forget him," Uhtred interjected like it was easy, his statement met with another sharp glare from me.

"There are plenty of men here, and your needs will be met just the same," he shamelessly added, leaving me flustered and unable to evade the rising redness that engulfed my face. The awkward tension in the air hung thick as their laughter echoed, making the already unfamiliar surroundings feel even more daunting.

I slowly felt my confident and bold attitude diminish with every passing moment, despite trying my hardest to muster up the courage and give these brazen men a piece of my mind I felt myself dwindling at the smallest remarks.

My mind was enveloped in a haze of memories featuring Atlas, and in that moment, the magnitude of how much I missed him struck me. 

If Iseult's prediction was accurate, and the possibility of returning home was forever out of reach, I had to confront the harsh reality that I might never lay eyes on him again.

"It would be a noble act, my lady," Leofric flirted capturing my attention, "but if anyone needs a last night with a woman, it is you" he pointed at Uhtred, who set his cup down and walked away nudging his head for Leofric to follow.

Left alone with Iseult, she extended the invitation, "You can spend the night with me." I smiled gratefully, gently placing a hand over hers, feeling the warmth of her gesture. "I haven't said it, but I am immensely grateful for everything you are doing," I expressed, sincerity lacing my words.

Despite my bold and daring nature, I recognized the importance of expressing gratitude when it was due. I wasn't one to overlook kindness or generosity.

"I have seen what the future will hold for you, it is the least I can do," she said, and her words, well-intentioned as they sounded, left a lingering sense of unease in the face of the uncertain path ahead.

That night unfolded in a blur of introspection and quiet tears. Lost in the recesses of my own thoughts, I grappled with the weight of everything experienced. I clung to hope and whispered prayers, yearning for the comfort of waking up once more in my boyfriend's comforting embrace. 

Desperate to brush aside the unsettling foresight as merely a figment of my imagination, crafted in the depths of a strangely vivid dream.

─── ✦⋅ ☆⋅✦ ───

Leofric died too soon imo, but I think Finan filled the void he left both were sarcastic and funny asf 😭

#aethelflaed #alfredthegreat #danes #england #finan #finantheagile #finantheagilexreader #finanxreader #historicalfiction #love #markrowley #osferth #ragnar #saxons #sihtric #sihtrickjartansson #thelastkingdom #tlk #tlkxreader #uhtred #uhtredofbebbanburg #uhtredragnarsson #vikings #xreader #thelastkingdomxreader #tlkff

[myjinri]

third time's a charm, am i right? hi again! i'm erin ( or e ) and here is ahn jinri 3.0 (honestly a 2.5). a few little tweaks but overall still the same. as you will soon see for yourself, i'm actually completing a biography and plots page this time around for easier future plotting lmfao. leave a like if you're interested in plotting with jinri, and i'll pop into your ims throughout the night. i also use discord so if you prefer that, just let me know and i'll be more than happy to add you.

1996-2008

february 15 1996. jinri really doesn't have that complex of a backstory. her life was as normal as it could get. jinri was born as the only child to a set of workaholic parents. while they were very present in her earlier years, she doesn't remember many fond memories including the both of them. she quietly kept to herself and placed her focus in doing well in school. along with any extracurriculars she may have been partaking in at the time.she was basically raised under the care of her grandmother, therefore was heavily influenced by her.

in fact, her love for dancing came from her grandmother, who was a dancer in the past. she took up dancing lessons as a hobby and as a way to connect more with her grandmother. she ends up loving it even more than she expected, and tries out many different genres until she finds the one she likes the most. favored the hiphop genre in dancing, which was up until she became a trainee.

offered to audition, she nearly didn't go because of the implications of leaving her familyand being surrounded by strangers. at the encouragement of her grandmother, she auditioned, passed, and soon signed with everlast.

2008-2014

having been used to the toxic environment she was in with dancing, jinri had assume that this would be no different. accustomed to success in her dance pursuits, jinri was determined to remain at the top, even if it meant resorting to tactics that were less than admirable. she isolated herself, believing that success was an individual achievement. she had gained an infamous reputation amongst trainees due to her cold demeanor at a young age.

by the time the news of a girl group debuting within the company was spreading, jinri thought that she was more than ready to make her debut. Having trained for over five years, the thought of her debut being close brought a glimmer of hope to jinri. however, she soon discovered that the ability to work with others was considered for groups. she wasn’t even considered for the lineup at all because of her lack of ability to connect with the other trainees and just the plain fact that she didn't fit the image in mind for the group.

it was a major blow to her ego and she started to lose hope, fearing that her chance might never come. if she wasn’t good enough after four years, then would she ever be? realizing that her behavior had hindered her chances of debuting in angelic, she was quick to right her wrongs. she had apologized to those she had wronged and started slowly changing for the better, even helping others, rebuilding her reputation amongst trainees. she slowly began to embrace her true self once more, and not the facade she had made to protect herself all of those years ago.

however, her confidence in her chances of debuting did no come back. jinri began considering a different plan to fall back on just in case she had ruined her chances for good. while it would’ve been easier for her to resort to being a choreographer or even just a dancer for the company, she wanted something new to explore. she turned to writing lyrics and jumped into the world of music production and directly her energy towards it.

taking her newfound interest seriously, what started as rough drafts consisting of a few lines slowly evolved into fully fleshed-out songs. however, Jinri was highly critical of her own creations, doubting her abilities and whether her work would ever be good enough by the company for an official release. that didn’t stop her, in fact, it fueled her even more. she continued to write various songs and learn from others around her.

her talents in this field quickly became evident as she was having songs picked up for other artists by the next year, proving to herself that she's an asset outside of dancing.

2015-2020

she secured a spot in the debut lineup of the girl group mirrorworld, and even gets a number of her songs picked for the debut album.

she dove headfirst into refining her skills and creating more music, driven by her desire to continually improve and make an impact with her work.

just her luck that mirrorworld would undergo a hiatus following their debut. it irritated her to see how much traction they were losing with each passing month, and she was just itching to take control of the situation and just make music that satisfied both parties.

that is not exactly what happened as it took months until mirrorworld's comeback was settled, but jinri had been involved with writing five of the songs on that album.

released a portal song a few months after, but went unpromoted and most fans do not know about it. it's one of those releases that you stumble across in your recommended after binging a bunch of mirrorworld releases.

opened a youtube channel the following year, also had her solo debut. her solo debut is something she doesn't like to think back on due to the mass amount of hate she received for it. she does acknowledge how popular the song was/is. 24 hours has not been performed by her since 2017 when it was released and the fans ask for its return.

a lot of rumors about her started circulating around this era, and some were straight up defamation of character. a little sensitive with all of the backlash and false accusations she was getting, she requested the company to take action, which didn't really happen because the rumors weren't big enough to actually hurt the company, but it did tarnish her reputation while it was circulating because of the company's inaction. this continued to be a common cycle throughout the years, making jinri's dissatisfaction with everlast slowly grow with each incident.

released another single the following year, which got her her first music show win as a soloist, along with a few photoshoots for magazines, and the public is a little wary of how many opportunities she's getting as a solo artist. imagine the anger when she released a full length album the year after that.

2019 was a interesting year for her. released her solo album which she didn't have much involvement in. learning choreography and recording four music videos for four different songs was draining. also wrote and produced for a group that she was not in for the first time in years. true north was like a breath of fresh air for her, sparking her interest again. even released a japanese single that is also often forgotten about.

2020 was a year. shooting for two separate calvin klein campaigns opened the door once again for criticism for being too sexual. worked with true noth twice this year, and did her big one with mirrorworld's album. was literally putting her all into that album as a last hurrah because she was going to ask the company for a break and contemplate fully leaving the company. surprise surprise, she goes into a meeting and finds out they want her to have another comeback early next year so she wouldn't be getting that break just yet.

2021-2023

jinri releases her second album near the beginning of 2021, and this was a work that she had her hands all over creatively. instead of feeling happy with its release and the amount of involvement she had, she was just tired. mirrorworld had released and promoted a full length album 2 months prior that she had always worked on, so she really had no chance to rest.

the following months just drained her more, filming an artist of the month video for studio choom and doing a shoot and interview for dazed korea. her final straw was the album repackage that she also had to promote. jinri felt as if she was working herself to the bone again.

she had a number of disagreements with management about numerous things over the years. the recent topics including decreasing her number of activities. the relationship between jinri and everlast was soured by late july which is when she came to the decision she was going to file for a contract termination.

heavily contemplating whether or not to continue being an idol during the year the lawsuit is going on. she had been losing herself and her passion for it over the last two to three years, and this was an opportunity to step away from the limelight.

after the contract lawsuit was announced, jinri was not heard or seen publicly for six months. during this time she was seeing if she truly wanted to step away from the limelight and just utilizing the break she had.

plays around with music a little bit, focuses more on dancing. eventually she started posting dance covers (and a selfmade song) on her youtube again, but still hadn't spoken out publicly. which she wouldn't do until the contract signing with secret garden was announced.

honestly, jinri's just letting each day pass by. currently in one of those phases in life in which she just takes a backseat with writing/producing, focusing on other things instead. as of right now, it looks like she's easing up on the control she felt like she needed to have over the group's discography.

she's more comfortable with just making sure it sounds like one of their songs? this is leaving a lot of room for her to actually not like a mw release at all. (spoiler: she kinda doesn't like omg and ditto despite being a producer on those songs)

PUBLIC IMAGE;

from a public image standpoint, you either love her or you hate her. most love her for her contributions in myworld but cannot stand the sight of her if she's missing the other four members. she's a little controversial for an idol, and it's obvious with the way the public opinion is always divided in anything she does. the #jinrihatetrain is always up and running, and at this point in her career, it has become part of her identity.

well known for her songwriting and producing. in fact, it is one of the very few areas that jinri receives a lot of praise for. although, it seems that she's extremely hard to work with at first glance, as she tends to stick to creating songs for either herself, her group, and her group members. working with true north came as a surprise to many, as they were the first group she wrote for since her debut. her continuous working relationship with the group over several comebacks made her signing with secret garden not a big surprise to fans.

and no matter what she may be criticized for, she cannot called a talentless idol. with performing and dancing being two of her strongest aspects, a few viral moments have sparked from dance covers uploaded to her youtube channel in the past couple of years. jinri always makes sure to show everyone that she deserves her spot on the stage, and shows no signs of slowing down nearly eight years in.

fans would call her an icon (a little much in jinri's eyes), but she just views herself as an ordinary person that has a lot of ideas and uses music as one of many outlets. she's definitely looking to branch herself into different avenues career wise because she simply just does not want to be confined into one little box as an artist.

what you may see in the public eye is an extremely watered down version of her. intended to seem very boring at first glance because that's what keeps the people away! somehow (through talent and genuinely being somewhat likeable and funny) still managed to build a small but strong personal fanbase for herself. may also be due to the fact that she's also very good at making others think that they know more about her than they really do.

she's extremely protective over her personal life because frankly, nobody is entitled to it. it's to the point where she barely has any childhood photos circulating online, and the only predebut photos are from the three-four years leading up to her debut. to give another example, it is known she is very close to her grandmother, but that is it. she has done her best to protect her family from the public eye.

PRIVATE IMAGE;

this time around, jinri's wayyy more friendly and approachable. which isn't much because she's still a hermit at heart. she's willing to talk to people (most of the time others will have to approach her first), and can carry on with small talk like no other if the conversation is not going anywhere interesting. she has the tendency to stick to what's familiar to her because that's is what's predictable and comfortable.

she still accidentally ghosts and leaves people on delivered/read for days at a time. DND warrior, type of person you have to press notify anyway to get her to read it. forbid its a phone call, because if it isn't one of her emergency contacts, she's not picking up. she may not respond quickly but she will get to it eventually! jinri is unfortunately just one of those people you have to catch in person.

takes work way too seriously. still a workaholic unfortunately. jokes that she gets it from her parents but she loathes the fact that she spends so much extra time working seemingly cant step away from whatever she's doing. perfectionist when it comes to music, sometimes spent nights in the studio working on songs, and it's safe to assume it's worse with the amount of songs she's working on for a project. the mirror festival and perfect world im looking at you

[ alcoholism trigger warning ] while she was always liked drinking, that along with other life events had led to it developing into a drinking problem. very few amount of people would pick up on this because she's often drinking in private, which also works best to prevent any more rumors about her character from leaking. gets a little concerning in periods of inactivity, so her little web show was a quick solution that lets her indulge in this vice.

"do not tell me about ur problems if u do not want to hear my thoughts, or at least start ur monologue with the fact u do not want feedback" type of person. she has the desire for everything to be sorted out and on it's way to being fixed, so while she is willing to lend an ear, she cannot handle her own problems + the group + whatever additional problems other may have esp if its unresolved. really doesn't help she can be a little opinionated with little to no filter sometimes

very open and honest. honesty is something that's also shown publicly, as she has been open about her experiences with mental health for a few years now. has been called a comfort person by fans (which confuses her but makes sense). she's kind of like a caring older sister if you get to know her. can get on your nerves occasionally, but no matter what, you know she has your back.

soon will find out she has some flaws that would demote her likeability status, but she has been working on herself and has made humongous progress. still has her moments where the ugliness slips through the cracks, esp if she hasn't been in the best mood, but has learned self-restraint and how to control her tongue from saying the first thing that comes to mind.

basic plots

creative friends, aka people she likely responds to the quickest. whether it's in music, film, fashion, or any other form, jinri always likes to pick the brains of other people and their creative processes. and if a good friendship comes out of that? just a perk of things.

close friends. whether it was her who reached out first or the other, they clicked well enough for jinri to view them as an important figure in her life.

casual friends. seen each other's faces frequently enough to recognize each other and may have had a few conversations. not enough for jinri to truly consider the other a close friend, but enough for her to consider tacking on the title of friend.

people who guested on her little show? she has a web drinking show funnily enough, and it's more on the casual side.

the inspiration behind her songs, good or bad.

relationships, past or future. past relationships were lasted a while or were flings. currently, she's supposedly in a "healing" phase but who knows what she's actually healing from.

people she's a fan of, i'd likely mention this in plotting if stuff ur muse does something up her alley.

those a fan of her, although she might be a little skeptical if u tell her that because who actually listens to her music?

dancers. she loves dancing even if that's overshadowed by her producing / songwriting. maybe those she'd hit up to dance with or even film a cover with???

#[ im sorry it's the aquarius in me that gets bored easily boo me if u want ] #[ if u read a typo its not there bc i will not spot it until i have to reread this ] #thefourintro

[koffing-time]

Which Pokémon took you the longest to bond with? (tix)

Do you have a naming convention for your Pokémon? (olivia)

Did any of your Pokémon have temperament issues when they first evolved? How did you handle it? (both)

[@pkmn-aide-mel]

I think I'll leave out Appleslice and Bun because i still have to properly get to know them, and the Yveltal as well because obviously the same. I will also leave out Caramel and Tofu, i think we did bond somewhat already, but they also have been with me for less than a month, so you know? Difficult to judge right now.

I doubt however that they will be "worse" than Chocco. He has very bad mood swings sometimes and that can make it really difficult with him, but I still love him very very much. We had struggled a lot with each other for years actually, there were days we couldn't be separated and others where he literally tried to burn me alive. We've gotten accustomed to each other though, and I'd even say we've grown a proper bond.

I do not have a naming theme (like Tix)!

I had a tendency to name my Pokémon after, just, random things i associated them with when i was a kid. When Marbles was still an exeggcute, he looked like a bunch of oversized marbles, and Beach Ball obviously looks like a big beach ball. Grill was cooking for me while i was doing my gym challenge, so that's where his name comes from. He almost did not even get one in the first place, i just could not find a fitting one.

Well, The Kalosian is obviously a very odd nickname though, and would not fit into this scheme. She is also a trade evolution. I traded her for a shelmet with someone from Kalos. I could not pronounce the original nickname, so instead i referred to her as "the kalosian escavalier" for some time, and she seemed to like it.

And, well Hans was given to me by the Striaton Gym because i do not have a water type and also my Pokémon are way too strong for beginner level trainers (1-2 badges). He did not have a name and i was very obsessed with Hans Zimmer at the time, so that's where his name comes from.

I don't think any of my Pokémon had issues after evolution. Most of them aren't even evolved, so that's also a thing. I guess Poppy was suddenly very energetic, but nothing unusual I'd say.

As for me, yes, all of them (well, those that are evolved). My general advice would be to give them time and especially space to get their energy spent and get used to their new body. Evolution takes a heavy toll on Pokémon, especially if they undergo a very drastic change.

For example, Marbles was like a foot tall as exeggcute? When i evolved him, he suddenly grew over 20 times in size. Gaining the dragon type is also quite strange i have to assume. He was upset that communication became more difficult at first, and it was a little bit traumatic that he could not be inside with me anymore. To accommodate that, I started camping outside with him. It became better with time, and he is now okay with sleeping in his pokeball.

For Grill: it is known that darmanitan are even more fiery than darumaka, but i was not really prepared. I sort of had to retrain him entirely which took years. Things he was allowed to do were now off limits, because his fire was hotter and his arms stronger and so on and it became a safety issue. Of course that upset him. I had to make an agreement with Clay in deiftveil city so i could use (part of) his gym grounds for a few weeks so Grill could power himself out without destroying things.

And The Kalosian... It was just a hard time for her. I and the other trainer were not thinking right. We both caught a Pokémon and immediately traded it for evolution. Do not do it like me. She got thrust into a trainers pocket and then she also had to deal with evolution into Escavalier. In case you do not know, it is much more stressful for the Escavalier than for the Accelgor, but both are changing very fundamentally. I'm still very sorry for having done this to her, but i think she has forgiven me and is now a cherished part of my little family. Again, giving her time and freedom to explore herself with as few boundaries as possible was a good way for us. Setting new rules slowly and letting her adjust to them one at a time is important.

In hindsight, i would change a lot regarding the care for my Pokémon when i was a child/teen. I really was not the best trainer. - Olivia

#tix answers #olivia answers #chocco the salandit #marbles the exeggutor #beach ball the gible #grill the darmanitan #kalosian the escavalier #hans the lotad #poppy the toxicroak #pokeblogging #pkmn irl #pokemon irl #long post

[cashlessvending-machine]

The Future of Snacking: Embracing Cashless Vending Machines

In a world where convenience and technology are intertwining more than ever, cashless vending machines are emerging as a game-changer in the way we access our favorite snacks and beverages. These innovative machines have revolutionized the vending industry by offering a seamless and secure payment experience, enhancing convenience for both customers and vending operators. In this article, we'll delve into the world of cashless vending machine, exploring their benefits, how they work, and why they're shaping the future of snacking.

The Evolution of Vending Machines

Vending machines have come a long way since their inception. What once required exact change and limited options has evolved into a sophisticated and customer-centric experience. Cashless vending machines are at the forefront of this evolution, introducing a variety of advantages that cater to our modern, fast-paced lifestyles.

The Advantages of Cashless Vending Machines

Convenience: Toss aside the need for physical cash. With cashless vending machines, all you need is your smartphone, credit/debit card, or a mobile payment app. This convenience eliminates the hassle of finding exact change or visiting an ATM before you can enjoy your favorite snack.

Speedy Transactions: Cashless payments are lightning-fast, ensuring you get what you want without any unnecessary delays. The transaction process is streamlined, making it ideal for busy environments where every second counts.

Security: Traditional vending machines often carry the risk of coin jams or malfunctions. Cashless vending reduces the chances of these issues and offers enhanced security for both customers and vending operators. Your personal information is encrypted, providing peace of mind during transactions.

Wider Payment Options: Cashless vending machines accept a variety of payment methods, including credit/debit cards, mobile wallets (Apple Pay, Google Pay), and even contactless payment methods like RFID or NFC technology.

Real-Time Monitoring: Vending operators can remotely monitor sales, inventory levels, and machine performance, thanks to the connected nature of cashless vending machines. This data-driven approach allows for better inventory management and faster restocking.

How Cashless Vending Machines Work

Choose Your Item: Select your desired snack or beverage from the machine's intuitive touch screen interface.

Payment: Use your credit/debit card or mobile wallet to make the payment. Some machines also support contactless payment methods.

Confirmation: Once the payment is processed, the machine dispenses your chosen item. A digital receipt might be provided for your records.

Enjoy: Indulge in your snack or beverage of choice with minimal effort and maximum satisfaction.

Embracing the Future

The rise of cashless vending machines is a testament to the integration of technology into our daily lives. As we become more accustomed to digital payments and seamless transactions, the convenience of cashless vending machines becomes increasingly appealing. Moreover, these machines are not limited to traditional snacks and beverages; they can also provide a platform for healthier food and drink options, meeting the evolving preferences of health-conscious consumers.

[the-stitched-wizard]

I have heard about tales of orphaned baby digimons that had been raised by some creatures animal or humanoid like or both from other worlds or the human world as well; what do you think about it? And how they would develop in such conditions and environment?

"I'm familiar with such tales, though some tend to be a bit more mythical in tone, so with those I'd say take them with a grain of salt." "I've said it before, and I'll say it as many times as needed. Digimon are, in a sense, very alive. Like any living creature, human, animal, or otherwise we adapt according to what we're surrounded by to an extent. One raised by humans with human luxuries will likely grow accustomed to a more 'human' lifestyle, though given many human luxuries aren't too different from what we have in more civilized pockets of the Digital World, that's not a difficult adaptation to make. We tend to be familiar at the least with concepts like vending machines, shops, entertainment, and washrooms."

"The idea of a Digimon born and raised in the wild by beasts is trickier since growing up with not much overhead or care isn't uncommon to begin with. A varying factor depending on whether we're born in a community of any sort, or alone. Many simply settle into the nature dictated by their coding. To survive, to grow, to fight, and to evolve, these are our utmost basic drives with some differentiation here or there. Forming pack-like bonds with wildlife isn't a stretch, but this too will depend on the nature of that particular Digimon and their given path of evolution which in itself opens entirely different questions."

"Regarding actual changes in response to their environment physically, we have answers to that. Any being in a cold or hot environment will inevitably change to better survive in that climate, albeit for animals it will happen over the course of generations. We'll tend to take that into account over the course of an evolution if given time to actually evolve. Within a more urban setting like a human town or city is where it becomes more up in the air, but it stands to reason that if possible, we'd take more 'compact' forms to better fit into a smaller, more structured society. Frankly, the main struggle would be getting those around them to accept them, or hide them."

"The main takeaway I would offer is that regardless of where it's born, who raises it, or what it has access to, a Digimon will never be able to forget that it is indeed one. Certain things are simply hard-coded in, and our nature is one of them. Even if other memories come and go between iterations or 'lives,' if you will, we'll always understand what we are, and what we're not. Even if we might live occasionally among you, we know we are not like you. Take it case-by-case, as you would anything that lives, breathes, or has dreams."

"I rambled, but hopefully this has been somewhat helpful."

#digimon #wizardmon #the stitched wizard #oc #where we come from

[indivtech]

Best Technologies To Learn In 2022

Introduction

Learning is never-ending. We're learning from the beginning like from making a step on the earth to a step on the dream or process of it. After several years, of being busy grooming ourselves for a better future, we've learned a lot. Now the confusion is about what to learn next and besides how to cope with the change. Humans are so-called upgrading creatures. We accept the change and try to get accustomed to it. So we've been accepting new technologies for years. We are living in an era where on one side people are using artificial intelligence for almost everything and on the other side, there's a lack of education, lack of maturity to adapt, and finally lack of evolution. We have to evolve to live in the revolution. In 2022, we've met with huge progress in case technologies. If you have a serious interest in technologies. You should learn the following technology trends -

Robotic Process Automation

RPA or robotic process automation is a new generation of software technologies that replicate human activities while dealing with a digital system or software. They can perform a range of defined activities like putting the right keystrokes by understanding what's on the screen. They are even faster and more consistent than humans as they are not bothered about getting up from their sit and having a coffee break. Let's point down some points that are the major reason to adapt to such technologies.

Robotic Process Automation - Accelerated transformation 63% of global executives mention RPA as a major component in digital transformation - Major cost savings RPA makes a significant change in the business metrics by never letting the profit graph downside. - Greater resilience RPA robots can meet work deadlines quickly by improving their activities. - Higher accuracy 57% of the global executives say that RPA reduces manual errors significantly. - Improved compliance In 2018 there was the 3rd Annual RPA survey organized by Deloitte where 92% agreed that RPA has met or even exceeded expectations for better compliance. - Boosted productivity Among 4500 global workers in the UIPath survey, 68% of global workers declared that automation would make them more productive. - More value for personnel 60% of the Forrester executives agreed that RPA is an exclusive key to turn on the focus of the people towards more strategic work. - Happier employees 57% of the Forrester executives mentioned RPA as a factor that increases employee engagement as well.

Virtual reality and Augmented reality

Virtual reality (VR) and augmented reality (AR) are two technologies that create different realities that we explore and enjoy. Virtual reality is totally an artificial computer-based realistic reality where augmented reality takes digital images and wraps your world with them.

Virtual reality and Augmented reality VR devices are pretty much expensive, especially the screen-built headsets like Oculus Rift, the Vive, or the PlayStation VR which connects to the PlayStation 4 game console. Examples like Gear VR and Google Cardboard are relatively cheap. AR headsets are more expensive than VR headsets but augmented reality doesn't only depend on headsets. They can also be used on smartphones and laptops. Remember the popular game Pokemon Go? Yes, that is a good example of augmented reality. You'll be surprised if I tell you that Snapchat or messenger filters are also a part of augmented reality. So now you are having a clear piece of concept how valuable these things are in now and the near future.

Non-fungible tokens or NFTs in blockchain technologies

Nonfungible tokens are blockchain-based tokens that represent unique assets. This is a digital certificate of ownership for a given asset that can be both digital and physical. An NFT is basically being created for a certain community and possesses value only to the buyers and their communities. NFTs can be bought and sold through the NFT marketplaces like OpenSea, Rarible, Foundation, etc. You will be very much surprised to know that the most expensive NFT was sold at 91.8 million dollars!

NFTs in blockchain technologies

Conclusion

Technologies are always interesting and provide adequate ingredients for the future. So any of the above-mentioned options is priceless to know. We didn't just provide you the options, we have provided you with the best options you can get. So choose what you are fond of. If you have more interest in robotics, go for RPA. If you are more of a creator type go for VR and AR or NFTs. WEBSITE Read the full article

#3BestTechnologiesToLearnIn2022 #AR #BestTechnologies #BestTechnologiesToLearnIn2022 #imabhihere #indivtech #indivtech.com #NFT #NFTs #NFTsinblockchaintechnologies #RoboticProcessAutomation #Technologies #VirtualrealityandAugmentedreality #VR #VRvsAR

[muskokafarm]

Horse Breakers in NSW

Horse breakers are different than other methods of training horses. Most methods involve putting a saddle on an unwilling animal and battling it until it is broken. Others may tie the animal to a tree or barn to slow it down or interfere with its struggles. If you cannot get a horse to stand still, try riding it in the water. It will become frightened and might refuse to stand still for long. Listed below are some common types of horse breakers.

The best time to break a horse is between two and three years old. Breaking a horse too early is not only unsafe for both the rider and the horse, but can also lead to back and joint problems. The horses you buy must be in good condition and fit for training and racing. However, it is a good idea to ride them in the first days of breaking so that they can get accustomed to wearing a saddle.

Before breaking a horse, you must first build up the horse's confidence. Breaking a horse is a process that requires time and patience. You have to gradually introduce new concepts until the animal becomes accustomed to them. Make sure the horse is comfortable around humans, so that you can touch him on all areas of his body and handle him from all sides. You also have to make sure the horse is comfortable with the halter, and that it understands the correct response to the rider.

For example, Matt French was born in Tumut, NSW, and raised on a farm half way between Tumut and Gundagai. He grew up on the property and competed in campdrafting, showjumping, and horsemanship challenges. He also follows in the footsteps of his ancestors, raising and breeding horses, and takes a special interest in the Australian Stock Horse. Despite having a love for horses, Matt French is also a devoted horseman.

Training horses teaches your horse to change its mental attitudes. You need to be able to control the horse's mind, not just its physical strength and size. Remember that your horse is ten times bigger and stronger than you are, so mental control is your number one priority. This is because horses do not have the same physical limitations as humans do. In addition, a horse is also more agile and prone to develop behavioural problems.

A well-broken horse is safe for almost any rider. The horse will respond to leg aids and will move sideways when commanded. It is quiet, and it is generally a good choice for beginner riders. But there are some important tips to remember before purchasing a horse. Always remember that it is better to train a well-broken horse. In this way, you can ensure its safety and the comfort of the rider.

Often times, the horse may become scared of something and refuse to comply. In these cases, you can reinforce the task in a non-violent way by backing up exercises with praise and a treat. The horse will be more likely to respond positively to a reward when the trainer removes the scary equipment. If you follow these tips, you will be able to retrain your horse to walk and trot on command without much trouble.

A horse breakers' philosophy is unique. This is a theory derived from the fact that some horses have evolved during the ice age. In fact, some researchers believe the horse is as old as the last ice age. This theory is backed by a recent study on horses that suggests that they may have been around during the last ice age. The horse may have developed as a result of a different lifestyle than humans do today.

When using a halter, it is best to begin training the horse from the ground, not the saddle. This will build the horse's trust and allow him to perform tricks. However, if the horse is already cold-backed or girth-proud, you should try to teach the technique in a calm and relaxed manner. Using the head down cue is particularly helpful, as this technique has been shown to reduce the horse's heart rate and induce calm.

The technique of legging can be tricky, but it can also be useful for teaching the horse to turn. The first step of training is to learn how to use your hands to turn the horse. It is also important to give the horse plenty of time to relax before mounting it. As time passes, you can start increasing the duration of your rides and training sessions. There are different types of legging techniques, but these are the most commonly used. Using one of these methods will help you teach the horse to step forward or back and not follow you.

#horse spelling #Race Horse Training Australia #horse spelling and training #horse breakers nsw #horse breakers victoria #pre training

[p-antomime]

𖦹 minors don’t interact. | wc: 1K.

𖦹 content: mean dom!megumi, unprotected sex, degradation, hate sex, fingering, dry humping, breath play, humiliation kink, mention of creampie, (mutual) pinning.

𖦹 pairings: fushiguro megumi x afab!reader.

ᜊ. request. | jjk masterlist!

"Are you in yet? I couldn't even feel anything" and a spiteful laugh coming from you were enough to make Megumi even more pissed off and finish pushing your body against the bed with your wrists pinned above the head using only one of his hands while the other was busy finishing removing your clothes with difficulty because you were trying to push him away with foot strokes and light slaps that honestly had no real effect.

It was the first time that Fushiguro Megumi had allowed himself to be consumed by his own hatred and had expressed it in a different way than you were used to. You had become accustomed to him ignoring your jokes and mean comments made since your memory could even recall or simply responding to them in a disinterested manner in the same way he usually did with Satoru.

The reality was that it had been years and years since you two had traded barbs and absolutely everything had started from when you were too small in elementary school. And Megumi came into your life on a rainy Monday, when your Taekwondo teacher announced that there was a new student joining the tatami that day. Soon after, there Megumi was in the same school clubs as you, climbing to the top more easily than you because he was a boy.

If you wanted to start playing the flute, Megumi wanted to too. If that young Fushiguro wanted to exchange to other places through high school, so did you. If you started dating a person as smart as you, Megumi would do the same, and maybe even better, since you ended your relationship before he ended his because, funny situation: in your head that relationship was preventing you from hating and plotting against Fushiguro Megumi in the same nonchalant, calculated and mean-spirited way as always.

It turned into a high note brawl and evolved into a mutual hate relationship that he, unlike you, couldn't even remember how it started. But you still had the sour taste of being traded out of your class for a boy perhaps more prodigal than you, and to some extent your mind even came to dislike Satoru Gojo and Kento Nanami a little for always putting you and that young Fushiguro in the same classes every year without exception.

And now, even after years of pure torture watching him get the awards you wanted, in college little had changed since Megumi followed the same major as you. As if he wanted to irritate you more until you exploded with hatred.

But this explosion didn't exactly come in a... normal, non-judgmental way. It didn't come with you screaming in his direction, no, it came with you moaning for him. Megumi's slender fingers inside you and his lips on yours in what should have been a kiss, but turned out to be a dominance struggle and an exchange of lip biting that almost made both yours and his almost bleed.

And ironically at no point did the two of you try to actually pull away, it was as if the more your fingers gripped his shirt and the more his covered cock rubbed against your pussy in a heated dry humping session, the more desire you felt to take out your hatred on the man who was now above you and seconds before was below you for pushing him against the sheets while rolling hips against his and marking his neck with various hickeys and bites.

"Tsk, you're just a needy slut at the end of your back, Y/N", Megumi growled at you pulling his fingers out of your pussy and seeing how wet they were before clamping a hand around your neck with enough pressure to take much of the oxygen out of your lungs and you grabbed his wrist tightly, almost to the point of leaving a finger mark there, "You say my fingers didn't make you feel any fucking thing, but whose pussy was it that was swallowing them like it was my dick, hm? Pathetic."

And a dry laugh escaped your lips as the young Fushiguro forced your legs open with the hand he had pulled away from your cunt and began to rub his cock between your wet, sensitive folds from the rough way he had fucked your tight hole.

"I'm a needy slut, 'Gumi?", you used the same nickname the high school class used with him and Megumi raised eyes from your pussy to your face, his already dark orbs even darker than before, as if you had thrown salt into a still open wound of his, "You're the only desperate here, almost drooling on my pussy, you look stup-ah!"

Before you could finish speaking, the man above your body quickly, without warning, invaded your insides and pinned your restless, writhing body against the bed using the palm that was around your neck, his fingers tightening around it as you moaned in discomfort and pleasure and your legs shamefully clamped around his hips. And he hadn't even used a condom, you would remember that later, when perhaps Megumi was releasing his cum deep into your womb.

"Damn!", he gasped, pulling completely out of you only to force himself inside you harder than before, a loud moan in the shape of his name escaping your lips and your head beginning to forget who it was that was railing you so good, "What are you? A fucking virgin? You're so fucking tight, I should have fucked you dumb before, you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

And then Megumi began a cruel, forcefully pleasurable rhythm against your gummy walls that swallowed him deeper and deeper.

"Fuck, I hate you... fucking, ‘M gonna...", an evil grin smile on Fushiguro's thin lips and you looked away without having any courage left to maintain eye contact.

“Yeah? How much do you hate me? Tell me how much you hate me while I finish fucking your pussy that seems to love me too much", he continued bumping his hips against yours, his pelvis slapping against your swollen clit every time his dick finished being buried inside your tight hole.

Your next words were little more than disconnected moans, mumbles, babbles of “I hate you” as Megumi fucked you dumb and groaned how your dirty hole even deserved to be filled with his cum.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk #megumi fushiguro smut #megumi x reader #fushiguro megumi #megumi smut #jjk megumi #megumi x y/n

[obey-me-rot]

You Shouldn't Be This Cool

A/N: Something purely self indulgent to kickstart this Obey Me writing blog. The idea mostly belongs to @warm-meelk because of how they drew their MC playing bass and then sprinkled in the fact that Levi would be the pianist and I just kinda...went from there q wq. And I also play bass so...all the more reason to write this!

Warnings: Levi trying to justify some of his more weird actions while MC seems to not only know...but enjoy the attention.

Levi wasn’t a creep, he was passionate.

He was passionate about TSL, he was passionate about anime, he was passionate about his idol groups and he was even passionate about learning new skills in order to better evolve himself into an ultimate fan.

So what he did today was not because he was a creep!

It was because he was passionate.

“Can you play that for me again, Levi?”

The third born tucks his feet on his chair, sipping up the noodles of his second cup of ramen as he watches the video feed from this afternoon. He smiles as the camera zooms in on your fingers, each one plucking the string of your bass absentmindedly while you listen to the melody he had composed.

As a TSL fan, he was ‘in the know’ of most TSL fan events whether they were held in the Devildom or in the human world. If they were worth the trouble he would attend and if it seemed like it was just a repeat fan event for one he already attended then he would just get the merch from the safety and comfort of his room.

Yet a completely new fan event had popped up on his radar one day, an online one.

One that challenged each and every TSL fan to create a song dedicated to their favourite lord.

Levi doesn’t remember much after that announcement, all he remembers is knocking on your door at devil knows what hours of the morning and shoving the music sheets in your face while pleading for you to help him out.

Your musical talent wasn’t hidden in the House of Lamentation. While most of the brothers could boast about having pretty decent singing voices or being ‘okay’ at certain instruments, your ‘weapon’ of choice was perhaps the most random but also well fitted instrument for someone like you.

You played the bass.

If he wanted to get specific, you played the TCB1006 Ibanez electric bass. You had mentioned in passing when you and him had met up to start ‘jamming’ out and Levi had retained that fact along with his hundreds of other facts that had to do with your particular interests and likes.

Again, because he was passionate...about your friendship.

The camera zooms out to film both of you, a happy giggle taking him over as he saw just how chill you looked.

How unfair was it that out of all the instruments you could play, you had to play the one that just made you look even cooler?

You were laying in his tub while he sat on the very chair he was sitting on now, plucking strings seemingly at random but humming some bars and trying to fit them with his melody. Your feet were propped up on the edge and the soft brown color of the guitar meshed so well with the glowing blue lights of his room that he is so glad he picked this spot for his hidden camera because you looked ethereal.

“I still can’t believe you composed this. It’s pro-level.”

“H--Ha! Of course! This is nothing but a piece of cake for me! If it's about the Third Lord and Henry then I’m all over it!”

Eyes take in the way you sit up and position your bass higher, fingers having a better reach as you start to ‘slap’ the strings in order to create a more wavy and deeper sound.

“Okay...I think I got it. Can you play the melody from the beginning?”

Oh here it was.

Sitting up, Levi puts his cup noodle down and grabs the nearby music sheets, pen already in hand as his attention on you becomes laser focused.

The beat you play is, well, playful. It is a high contrast to his almost operatic piano melody and he could almost hear himself playing a bit slower as if wondering if you had even heard what he was playing

“Uh MC…?"

“Trust me.”

Levi bites his lip as he feels his heart skip a beat, not even having to look at the screen to see that he was blushing. His past self was so predictable…

Although wasn’t his present self all the more pathetic for reacting to your words a second time?

He’d rather not think about it too much.

Your purpose had come shining through the moment Levi started to really hear the notes you were playing. It was almost as if you were mimicking Henry’s character with the bass. Cool, collected and eager to learn more about the world he had been thrusted into, your bass managed to capture the curiosity of Henry’s while his piano clearly symbolized the shy but deadly Third Lord.

The bass would go high, the piano would go low but as the melody started to harmonize so did the way your playing did with his. It was if he was the Third Lord, shyly peeking at the way Henry interacted with the world around them…

Only to turn around and invite him to join along.

His eyes go up to the screen.

You looked so happy, your fingers plucking away as he continued playing along with you. Your eyes turn to look at him and he almost wants to punch his past self in the face for not looking back. The camera had been perfectly placed to capture the way you tilt your head as you stare at him, chuckling as he clearly gets far too into the music for his own good.

To miss such an exclusive UR moment from you, he should be ashamed of himself.

“Haha. Thank the devil I came up with this camera idea!”

Levi blinks as he looks around, coming face to face with his beloved Henry as the fish stares at him from his bowl.

“...don’t look at me like that, Henry…”

The fish blinks.

“I wasn’t doing it to be a creep! I just wanted to write down the notes MC played before I forgot them.”

Henry’s mouth opens and then closes.

“And see! I even missed such exclusive moments from them! Look!”

He pauses the video and turns the screen so his fish can take a better look.

“5:06. I even timestamped it. Right here, MC is smiling and looking at me so cutely that it would be almost a sin to not record it!”

His fingers tap a couple of keys as he goes back to another point of the video.

“3:58, they smile and do such a cool trick with their fingers that I didn’t even notice that they stick their tongue out whenever they get too into playing! Do you see that Henry?”

A couple more taps as he keeps the video playing, the goldfish swims close to the edge of the bowl.

“I missed so many great moments all because I was so lost in playing! And I just didn’t want to ask them if I could record them because then they might think I’m using the footage for some sort of weird purpose and I would never do something like that to them! My Henry is far too amazing for me to just watch them one time! I just wanted to make sure of the notes they were playing! This is all for passion--!”

“Levi?”

He stops talking as he looks back at the screen, Henry swimming away while Levi tuned into the video once again.

“Was that good? I don’t know why but having the bass go a bit higher as I mute the strings feels almost like--”

“Like a conversation! It’s like the instruments are talking!”

Okay maybe this camera idea wasn’t the greatest after all, that was such a stupid thing to say and if he could go back and just slap the words out of his very mouch, he would.

Yet once again, his MC showed just why they were at the top of their ‘favourites’ list.

“Yeah! Like a convo!”

The conversation dissolves into randomness as Levi sighs and looks down at his sheet music. He only got a few notes down. Devildom, what was the point of having perfect pitch if he didn’t use it all the time? He straightens his screen out as he grabs a pencil instead of a pen, knowing full well that if he wanted to get this done he would have to rely on listening to you play and not looking at the screen.

If he finished this quickly then he would be able to stare at yo--it...he would be able to stare at it the rest of the night.

He goes to rewind the video but stops when he notices the scenery has changed just a tiny bit. You were out of his bathtub and looking at his aquarium, tapping the wall twice as some of his other fishes came up to greet you.

They were already so accustomed to you that he was sure even Lotan would know who you were.

Your attention goes from his aquarium wall to his computer, looking at all of his figurines and other merch he proudly showed off. A few more steps to the right and you were looking at his bookshelf--

Only for your eyes to lock with his.

He rolls his chair back immediately, his heart dropping to his feet as you reach out to the camera and pluck it from its hiding place.

No. No no no nononononononono!

This was it. You were done with him. Levi didn’t have a lot of friends but he knew that this was probably a friendship ender. His pupils contract as he sees you look at the camera with a confused look, already guessing your thoughts before you could vocalize them.

This weirdo was filming me the entire time. And he was hiding the camera? Disgusting. I’ll make sure to never come by his place again. What an absolute creep.

“MC...I didn’t--”

His jaw clicks shut as small tears gather at the corners of his eyes, not yet falling down his cheeks as he sees you smile and wave at the camera.

What--?

“Levi. If you wanted to film you didn’t really have to hide it. I want something to remember this session too. Next time you can just ask~”

You wink and Levi can feel his heart going from the floor all the way to his throat.

“Oh and send me a text when you have the footage ready. We can watch it together.”

He lets out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding as you place the camera back before his voice rings out from the video, exclaiming about all the snacks he had brought. So that’s why he had found you standing up, and here he thought you were leaving…

Send you a text...the footage…?

His hands scramble to his phone as he quickly enters the passcode, blushing as he sees a new message from you.

“Mind if I come over again? I have a new bassline I want to show off.”

Levi puts the phone down slowly before getting up---

Only to immediately fall down, hands over his face as he curled up on the floor.

Of all the characters he thought he would be in a shoujo, the last one he thought he would end up as is the heroine.

Not that he was regretting it, this was perhaps the best outcome that had happened in his now not so miserable life.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me leviathan #obey me mc #obey me levi x reader #//*holds levi* #//I just think he is neat q wq

[fancysimpinghere]

Euphories pt.4 (Sykkuno x reader)

Well, hello everyone! I want to deeply apologize for such a long break in posting there. We all know how hard life can sometimes be. But I arrived with a finish of this story and I hope you will like it! Enjoy!

summary: all good things eventually come to the end and insecurities aren't helping. Adult life is hard, so are decisions. Even if mistakes happen, there would be something to do to fix your frienship. And who knows, maybe things would evolve into something deeper and more advanced than simple relation between friends?

It has been two months since your first encounter with this pretty boy. Luckily, your schedule wasn’t that busy in summer months, so you could visit Thomas in his grandfather’s shop at least twice a week. Your friendship was blossoming, you both surprisingly had a very good contact. When you visited the shop, Thomas usually was waiting for you with one of the magic cassettes, but sometimes he was just showing you around. Actually, you found yourself almost working with him, because you were helping him with unpacking new items, organizing things and cleaning. It was very fun for both of you - you could spend more time together and get to know each other. But you had your own job as well, and summer time was slowly ending. You knew that if you want to keep seeing Thomas, you have to bring your friendship to another level and start to meet up outside. Little did you know that he rarely left shop or house. These places were his comfort zone and You didn't want to push him to do something really demanding. You decided to give him some time to get accustomed to your presence in his life and let Sykkuno make this important step. All you could do then was wait and do your best to gain his trust even more than you had already. When holidays ended, you were sad, because that means less free time - and less time spent with Thomas. But you still came to his shop, even if you were tired or had to sacrifice your sleep time. Sometimes you helped his grandfather with some simple chores, made some cookies for them both or just kept him company - you knew that older people seek attention from others and you couldn't say no to him. But to be honest, it was difficult to bring together your new lifestyle with your old one. Of course you liked Sykkuno, and you felt about him a little different than an ordinary friend - you liked him more and this was also not easy. You were afraid that if he found out about your little secret, it would scare him away and you would lose him as a result. Day by day you were trying to shove your feelings away and focus on helping him, but every moment spent with Thomas started to feel like too much for you. You were worried if he noticed small changes in your behaviour, but he seemed fine. Because of that, you started to lose yourself in work - your amount of free time dropped almost to the bare minimum because of afterhours, and even if you had a free day, you were too tired to visit your friend.

On the other hand, Thomas was internally freaking out. In the end of holidays he started to catch feelings for you, but was too afraid to admit it even to himself. He enjoyed your company a little bit too much, and you started to look better than before in his eyes. But he was sure that you are too good to him and you deserve better than a shy boy with nothing to offer. So he was amazed that you still visited him after your work started and spent your precious time with him. He was absolutely affected by your kindness and willingness to help.

He knew that if he wants to keep you even as a friend, he has to do something. You were his only friend and after these months spent together, he couldn't imagine his life without you. So when you started to visit his shop less often, he felt hopeless. Sykkuno was sure that he bored you out of his life because of his strange addiction to video games and antisocial lifestyle. He didn’t know what to do. His low self-esteem was not helping him with putting his thoughts together. After the first two weeks without your visit to his home or shop, he was devastated. Nothing from his special collection of games and films could make him completely happy anymore, because his thoughts were occupied by you. But one day, when he was organizing his special cassettes, a movie caught his eye. When he read the title, an idea sprung to his mind and he was that desperate for your presence, he almost instantly made a decision.

*********************************************

You started to feel a bit nostalgic when you were looking through the window at falling snowflakes. It was the first snow of the year, so you were also a little bit excited. But when you were sitting in a small cafe in your town, a cup of hot chocolate in front of you, memories slowly creeping from the back of your head. Memories of sad past months, but also of warm and joyful summer. But the most important thought in your mind was the reason for your presence in the cafe. Your fingers unconsciously wandered on the screen of your phone to once again open a message from your friend Thomas. You had strong remorse for leaving him alone and don't contacting him in almost a month. You didn't know what to expect from today's meeting with him, but you were shocked that he invited you to a public place, where there could be a lot of people. Your line of thinking was cut, when small bells over the door frame rang and someone entered the cafe. You guessed it was your company for today - hood covered his head and his face was covered by black mask, but you were sure that this is your friend, whom you haven't seen for almost 2 long months. You noticed his lack of gloves - his hands were red from the cold temperature outside. He still got snowflakes on his massive hoodie, but they were melting away. Even if you felt a little bit awkward, you felt a strange warmth in your chest at the sight of him. You longed to hear his soft voice and laugh, and your heart squeezed just at the thought of it.

He paused for a while to look for you among other people present at the cafe and his gaze finally met yours. He shyly headed towards you and slowly pulled off his hood and mask, so you could recognize him as you haven't done it already. Even from a distance you could say that he was nervous, his hands were making some awkward movements and his eyes shifted from one person to another, like he was expecting somebody to attack him. Finally he was standing right in front of your table and you felt terribly for leaving him with poor excuses about work. He looked bad, just as you - sleepless nights put their marks on your face and you recognized them on his face too. Before he could say anything, you stood up immediately, and reduced the distance between you two. You looked him deep in the eye and hugged him carefully to not scare him. You didn’t care about other people, because you especially chose a more private area of the cafe, in the corner and a massive part of it was covered by plants. You felt Thomas tensing up after you embraced him, but after a few seconds he relaxed and hugged you back.

- "I'm so sorry, Sykkuno." - whisper left your mouth before you could think about forming a more developed sentence, but these words were only one in your mind right now. - "I missed you so much."

At these words he hugged you tighter and you could swear that he smiled like he always did when he was embarrassed.

- "I missed you too." - he whispered back, straight to your ear. You felt butterflies waking up in your stomach at his closeness and blushed a little.

- "It’s nice to- nice to see you, hm." - he stuttered a little and moved his arms away from you, so you did the same. You both sat down and you looked at his face again. Small blush creeped his cheeks, but it could be from the temperature change. - "I was afraid that you wouldn't have time for… For me."

He looked at you like a lost puppy and you felt awful. But before you could say something, he gave you a very warm and wide smile.

-"But you had and I'm happy about it." - he said and started to look for something in his pockets. - "I know that you are a very hard working person and I wanted to thank you for helping me and my grandfather despite this." - it was the longest sentence you ever heard from him, so you were a little bit speechless, but he looked like he wanted to say something more. However, you felt guilty and you had to apologize to him properly.

- "Thomas, I’m sorry. "- you interrupted before he could continue. - "I'm sorry for non contacting you in days and I know it was wrong. I… I can explain why I did this."

- "You don't have to. "- He answered and his search finished with success, because he placed down something rectangular on the table. - "I asked you for a meeting, because I realized something during the past months. And I can't keep this a secret any more."

He was looking even more nervous now. He hid his hands in the sleeves of his hoodie, because they were trembling a little. You also noticed that his face is clearly and non deniable red almost like a tomato, and he was a little bit hesitant when speaking. You decided to not interrupt him this time, and you also felt nervous. He looked at the window to search for the right words or find the courage, you assumed. But then he suddenly returned his gaze to you.

- "What is it, Thomas?" - you asked softly to encourage him to share his thoughts with you. You decided to use his real name to show you are taking him seriously. Deep in your heart you felt a little spark of hope, but you didn't want to make expectations and then be dissapointed. You watched his movements carefully, your eyes dropping to the item lying before him, and you finally recognized the thing. It was a cassette thanks to which you could know him. Your mouth opened in surprise and when he noticed that, he smiled coyly, but stress was still recognizable on his face.

- "I wanted to tell you for a long time, but… I… I couldn’t find the courage. But now, I decided that I have to do this." - words left his mouth faster than usual, and his eyes nervously watched your reaction. He sighed and blinked a few times. -" You are my best friend, my only friend, but I realized I like you a lot more than that."

You were completely speechless. You didn't even imagine this scenario - it was too perfect to be real, but there you are. Your mind exploded with a sudden wave of joy and happiness, because the dearest person you know just admitted to liking you back. You smiled sincerely to him and he had to notice a spark of joy in your gaze, because he stopped talking and just watched you with his big eyes.

- "Thomas, I like you too. "- you said in answer, honestly looking into his eyes. -" I didn’t know how to tell you, so I distanced myself fro you, because I didn’t want to scare you or… "- you didn’t finish and all of sudden felt embarrassed for your lack of initiative.

- "I thought it would be nice to talk about it in the place where our friendship started. "- he said slowly and carefully moved the cassette on the table towards you. He looked down for a second, then returned your gaze. He looked more determined than before and smiled at you once again. You could look at his smile forever - there was nothing more cuter than his expressions.

- "So…Would you like to accompany me on this journey?" - he asked softly and pulled out his hand to you from the sleeve. He watched your reaction carefully.

- "Yes, I definitely would." - You giggled and blushed a little, but gently grabbed his hand and intertwined your fingers with his.

He tightened his grip on your hand and you both touched the cassette with your other hands. The world started to spin, and even when you started falling down, all you could feel in this moment was falling in love with this cute, lovely boy, soon to be your boyfriend, who held your hand like his life depended on it and laughed at the strange sensation. You couldn't help and joined him, looking forward to experiencing the best adventure - and you were certain that it would be the best, because you had the greatest companion in the whole world.

~fin~

#sykkuno x y/n #sykkuno #sykkuno x reader #sykkuno imagines #y/n imagine #imagines #fanfiction #x reader #reader #y/n #euphories #games #videoclub #y/n x character #y/n imagines #y/n insert #corpse husband

[multisfabulis]

Death’s Hypocrisy and Life’s Antithesis

Word Count: 3636

TW: Discussion of death and suicide

I can feel my soul wanting to leave my body as I type this out because I'm super nervous over how this will do. Not only is this the third ship fic I've written this year, this is both my first BSD fic (a fandom I've been in since 2016) and my first DazAtsu fic (my OTP since my foray into BSD in 2016) AND it's the last fic I'll have written and posted for 2021. At least I fulfilled my promise of writing more than two fanfics this year!

So how did this idea come about? Well, I've had this HC scenario of Atsushi being in a suicidal state of mind and Dazai helping him out of it while making himself out to be a hypocrite since 2016 (I believe) but I never thought I'd turn it into a fic due to lack of confidence in my abilities and not knowing how to flesh it out beyond the bare bones. Then, over the course of time as I worked on my confidence and my skills, I eventually came around to the idea of turning my HC into a fic. Then Wan! happened (Episode 11 or 12, you know which moment I'm talking about specifically) and I stewed around for months until this fic came into existence earlier this month.

I didn't even plan on this being my first fic in either category! I planned on my first BSD being a SigAtsu fic because I enjoy living in rarepair hell and my first DazAtsu fic was going to be a Kagerou Days fic with death and tragedy but then Wan! happened and I postponed both. That was honestly for the best.

I want to apologize for the philosophizing, Dazai and Atsushi possibly being OOC, and for the pacing. Although I wrote this with the purpose of posting it once it was done, I also wrote it with the intent of indulging in 19 year old me's HC and I'm fully aware this would never happen in canon as it stands now. Still, I hope this fic is enjoyable to read, despite its issues!

One last thing, I do plan on writing more BSD fics! Some of them are DazAtsu while others are for other ships and a couple are even crossover fics! Those will be posted sometime in the future but this is me testing the waters for now!

Read on AO3 | Read on DeviantArt | Support me on Ko-fi!

     What is life? A question humans have asked themselves dozens upon hundreds upon thousands of times throughout their existence and it was a question that seemed to have no “correct” answer. If you were to ask ten random strangers plucked off the street what life was, they were bound to give you wildly differing answers. A person’s interpretation of the concept relied on a multitude of varying factors, such as their past, their present, and what they believed would be their future. They also didn’t remain static; they could change due to any number of reasons and in a matter of years, months, weeks, or even days, depending on what happened. The answer was ever evolving, making it unlikely, if not impossible, to ever truly know it.

     For Dazai Osamu, his answer was this. Life was dark, full of death and despair with no end in sight, no hope of it ever getting better. It was hard to tell when it began or even if it “began”, suggesting the possibility he’d known of a life without the perpetual feeling of emptiness within it. Sure, his life went from absolute certainties to hypothetical implications over the past few years of his existence but it didn’t erase his insatiable desire for death. It always followed him, whether in the world of the living or in dreams, it stuck to him like a second skin. Life, as it stood now, was tortuous torment, something he became accustomed to long, long ago.

     The question he sought the answer to was, what was death? It was the end of life, the state of being dead. Children could understand such a concept once it was explained to them in easy and simple terms. However, what he really wanted to know was “What is death?” Would it give him the peace he lacked? Would death be able to fill the void that was inside him? Did death really mean the end of someone’s life or was it a term people used to describe the process of a soul leaving its mortal vessel to move on to the afterlife to exist for however much longer? Then there was the belief that someone was never truly gone if they lived on in others’ memories of them. It’d be just his luck to die only to realize a facsimile of him was still alive by that method. He’d never receive any rest, if that were the case.

     It was another one of those moods again. The ones where he pondered on the meaning of life, death, and other abstract concepts before coming to the realization they’d never be completely understood. Usually, when he found himself thinking such things, he’d stow himself away in a secret place for some time until he was done. Today, it occurred during work so he naturally snuck out while no one was looking and came up to the roof, with mostly everyone none the wiser. Ranpo knew because he was Ranpo and Kunikida tore the place apart trying to find him till he eventually checked the roof. As disruptive as these moods were, they did get him out of doing work and they had the added bonus of pissing Kunikida off so it was a win-win scenario.

     Everyone should’ve already been on their way home by now. However, he still had to finish his case reports and send them out before the day was over. He played around with the idea of doing work for a moment. He could write up his reports and be on his merry way but procrastination’s always been a hard habit to break and putting them off for another day was so tempting. Oh, what was he to do?

     Yokohama was just as lively today as it was every other day. Cool air came to chase away the late summer heat as night crept ever closer. Down below were the sounds of people walking and talking and traffic, the typical ambiance of a city. The clear sky above was streaked with vivid hues of red, orange, violet, and blue as the sun set over the horizon towards the west. It was an all too familiar yet still comforting sight to see for a dead man walking.

     He heard the door behind him open with a loud creaking of its hinges. Just by the process of elimination, there were only a handful of people who knew he’d been up here today. He turned around and was greeted by---

     “Atsushi-kun.”

     Atsushi didn’t say anything. It wasn’t surprising, since Dazai noticed he hadn’t been acting quite like himself over the past few days. He still had his snark and was keeping up with both work and Dazai’s antics but it was easy to see he was half-assing it so as to not worry anyone. Whatever was going on, Dazai figured it was nothing too serious and wanted to give Atsushi some time to work through it on his own. Now he was wondering if, perhaps, that was the wrong thing to do.

     “Did Kunikida-kun ask you to come fetch me?” he asked before letting out a fake exasperated sigh. “I swear, it’s like he has no trust in me at all!”

     Instead of beating around the bush or try his hand at lying, Atsushi replied with a simple yet curt, “No, he hadn’t.”

     That was a tad concerning. He said nothing more and stood beside Dazai, resting his arms and head down on top of the railing. He hadn’t seen much of Atsushi today so he wasn’t sure whether something terrible happened while he was out working on a case or if his childhood decided to rear its ugly head up again. There was a good chance it was either-or. Regardless, now was most definitely the time for him to step in and give his lovely kitten some help.

     Before he could open his mouth, however, there were a couple things he saw that gave him pause. Atsushi had an almost listless quality about him, like it took everything he had to just stand there and do little else. Then there were his eyes, which were setting off alarm bells in his head. They looked darker than usual, the violet and gold muted to the point they seemed lifeless. They never lost their light, even in the worst of situations, so Dazai was really starting to worry over what was happening with Atsushi. Panic was a feeling he hated having.

     “Dazai-san, can I ask you something?” Atsushi called out, motionless.

     Despite his gut instinct telling him it was a bad idea, Dazai replied with, “You know I’ll always answer your questions to the best of my ability so ask away.” This might give him a clue as to what was troubling Atsushi so he decided to indulge him.

     “Do you think--” he stood up straight, keeping his eyes transfixed on the city before him-- “if someone were to jump from this height, they would--” his grip on the railing tightened and he swallowed nervously-- “die?”

     Okay, that was very unsettling to hear. Atsushi would never ask such macabre questions, much less entertain the thought of them. He was someone who fought to survive, to live life and see all it had to offer. To listen to a person who enjoyed even the smallest pleasures of the world wonder if a fall off of a building would kill someone went against his character.

     Slipping the mask on, he attempted to brush off the question as a morbid joke with, “Why, Atsushi-kun, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were asking that to see if you wanted to try it for yourself!” It was meant to be a chance to prove him wrong, even in the vain hopes he wasn’t. “But I know you’d never---”

     “And what if I did?” Atsushi asked, cutting him off mid-sentence. “What if I said I did want to try it?”

     “Well, it’s only a hypothetical scenario, isn’t it?” Dazai smiled uncomfortably, growing increasingly disturbed by how the conversation’s going. “It is hypothetical, right?”

     An agonizing moment passed by before Atsushi answered, “…Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.”

     “Atsushi-kun, you--” He placed a hand on his shoulder to slowly turn him when---

     Atsushi shook it off but it was enough. It was only a glance yet what Dazai saw struck fear into his core. What little light there had been in his eyes previously was completely gone, replaced with a dead hollowness. They were too similar, too close to the ones Dazai remembered staring back at him in the mirror during his days in the Mafia. It was an uncanny resemblance and he needed to do everything in his power to right this wrong, because it didn’t fit sweet Atsushi.

     “What happened? Can you tell me?” He thought if he approached this gently, it’d coax an answer out of Atsushi. It didn’t work. “I’m here to listen if you wanna talk about it.” More silence. “Atsushi-kun, I want to help you but I can’t do that if you won’t tell me what’s wrong.”

     He let out a sigh. “I thought you of all people would understand this.”

     “I do but that doesn’t mean this is the right way to go about it. What you’re thinking of doing isn’t going to solve everything, it’ll just make it worse.” God, he sucked at this. Not only was he the absolute worst person for this, it was his darling Atsushi he had to talk back from the edge. Anyone else would be better suited but it was just his luck to get caught up in this.

     “You think I don’t know that?” He turned away from the railing to face Dazai. “That’s all I’ve thought about over the past few days and I still feel like this. If anything, it’s only made me feel worse.”

     There was one tactic left he hadn’t tried yet. The very thought of using it was contemptible but desperation called for drastic measures. “Think of all the people that’d be affected by your passing, Atsushi-kun. Think about how Kyouka-chan would feel if you were to die.” He felt like scum for bringing her into this. “You have so much to live for so that’s why---”

     “Don’t give me those empty platitudes, Dazai-san, we both know you don’t believe in what you’re saying.” There was barely restrained anger in his voice and he glared at Dazai with heated intensity. “How can you ask me to live when you don’t even give yourself the same courtesy? You’re-you’re a hypocrite, Dazai-san!”

     He deserved that, especially for trying to manipulate him. Atsushi was right; Dazai was a hypocrite. How could a man like him talk someone out of committing suicide when he couldn’t extend the same mercy to himself? He craved death like it was his life’s purpose; he wasn’t qualified for this.

     Yet, because it was Atsushi, Dazai had to help him. Whatever was making him think he should die, he needed to be convinced it was only temporary. A proven hypocrite’s point still stood.

     “I may be but it doesn’t make what I said any less true.” Atsushi averted his eyes, most likely ashamed of his earlier outburst. Dazai’s voice took on a softer, kinder cadence as he said, “You can choose to believe what I’m about to say next, all I ask is for you to listen, okay?”

     Gently, he grabbed Atsushi’s hands and held them in his own. It was clear to see the difference between them in how they viewed life. Dazai’s were stained in so much black blood, they showed naught a trace of the “human” underneath. Atsushi’s, meanwhile, were pure white with only a splash of scarlet. He couldn’t stomach the idea of killing someone while Dazai felt the countless amount of sins crawling up his back. They were life and death yet the reaper was giving his antithetical partner the encouragement to keep going. How paradoxical.

     “You’re right, I’m a hypocrite. What right do I have telling you to live when I don’t tell myself the same?” He stroked the back of Atsushi’s hand with a thumb. “But it’s because you deserve to while I don’t. You’re a good person, Atsushi-kun, and I’m a poor imitation of one. You want to save people, you have saved people, and it’s because you are and choose to be a good person.”

     Dazai, in a rare moment of candidness, cast his gaze down to their conjoined hands before continuing on. “In some ways, you’re what I strive to be yet I know I can never reach you, no matter how hard I try--” his grip tightened ever so slightly upon sensing Atsushi’s incoming protests-- “and that’s okay. I’ve committed far too many crimes to ever be redeemed, I know I’m destined for hell but you still have a chance.

     “The world will always be a dark and harrowing place but--” he looked up and took a deep breath in-- “you, along with everyone else in the Agency, fight to make it less so. If you were to die here and now, the world would lose that little bit of goodness, that little bit of light only you have.

     “That’s why I ask--” he cupped Atsushi’s cheek, peering into his eyes that seemed to be regaining their natural brilliance-- “for you to live. Don’t die, not yet, not until it’s your time to go. Live, Atsushi.”

     Atsushi stepped back, turning away from Dazai, who was unsure on what he should do next. He felt too exposed standing out here but he didn’t want to run and hide again until he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt Atsushi would be all right. The mask had a tendency to slip whenever they were together but this might’ve been the first time Dazai let Atsushi into his walls, if only for a moment. It was strange and not at all appropriate with the kind of relationship they shared. Yet, if his precious Atsushi was ever in this situation again, he’d bring them down without any hesitation.

     Each and every word was said with the utmost sincerity. He spoke out of the depths of his heart, even if he was a demon masquerading as a human. He wanted to believe he got through to Atsushi, stopped him from potentially going through on a mistake that’d cost him greatly. He held on to hope like it was a lifeline.

     They may have been on the side of light but they were there for very different reasons. Dazai only wanted to fulfill his dear friend’s dying wish of becoming a good man in spite of all the atrocities he’d committed. Atsushi wanted to do good, whether it was by helping people or doing the right thing, which was more selfless and noble than Dazai could ever be. The world could care less if another monster like him were to die but if it were Atsushi? It’d be worse off.

     Several minutes went by as he wondered if he had possibly crossed his boundaries when he heard it. A quiet sniffling, followed by a shaky intake of air and a soft whimper, like someone was crying but trying to hide it. It was a sound he recognized, having listened to it many times before.

     Tears threatening to spill over filled Atsushi’s eyes. His shoulders trembled as he bit down on his lower lip to keep himself from sobbing. As sad as the scene was, it brought Dazai some much-needed relief. Atsushi was going to be okay.

     “D-dazai-san…” A tear rolled down his cheek before he wiped it away. “I’m sorry for… worrying you and for yelling at you earlier.” Then, as if he couldn’t hold it any longer, the dam burst open as a myriad of tears fell to the ground. “I’m sorry that I let you down, that I’m just a disappointment and---”

     Maybe it was from hearing the absolute pain and guilt in his voice or the pitiful way he looked at him. Whether it was one or the other, it didn’t matter. It was enough for Dazai to grab Atsushi’s wrist, draw him into his arms, and just hold him for however long it took till he stopped crying.

     Atsushi didn’t return the sudden hug, likely too shocked to do so. This was very much out of Dazai’s comfort zone and it wasn’t like him to make spur-of-the-moment decisions based on pure emotion. However, what Atsushi needed right now was an equal, not a mentor, and Dazai hoped he was filling in that position somewhat. If this left Atsushi feeling better after everything, it’d be worth it.

     “You could never disappoint me,” he whispered, smiling fondly. “You always manage to find a way to surprise me, even exceed my expectations.” His arms tightened ever so slightly around him. “You’re more than you think you are.”

     Dazai gave Atsushi one last squeeze before pulling away a moment later. Atsushi stood stock still, no doubt stunned from everything that just happened, and he had a flush of embarrassment on his face. Knowing he was going to be all right, Dazai felt confident that they had nothing left to discuss.

     Atsushi called out in a meek voice, “Dazai-san, I---”

     “I’ll be seeing you tomorrow, Atsushi-kun.” Dazai walked past him towards the direction of the door. “Kunikida-kun will kill me if I don’t finish my work and I’d rather my death be at my own hands.” He opened the door, the creaking of its hinges echoing from inside the stairwell. He turned back to Atsushi. “I’ll be here if you need me.”

     Before more could be said, he went inside and descended the stairs. He made it down one flight, deciding to get off on the floor above the Agency. Going home sounded appealing but he’d be risking bumping into anyone from there and he really didn’t want to deal with them after what happened. He walked further in, wanting to ground himself back to reality.

     That was… a lot. He was used to high-pressure situations, fights where his life could be snuffed out by a split-second decision but this was different. Dazai, a man who yearned for the sweet release of death, had to talk down Atsushi, someone that lived life to the fullest, from suicide. Not only was it a complete reversal of some of their earliest interactions but he opened up to him. He was a former Mafia executive that kept even those closest to him in the dark about his intentions yet he bared just a piece of his soul to save his protege. How things change over the course of 4 years…

     Atsushi was special. There was no other way to explain it; Atsushi had endeared himself to Dazai with his honesty, his faith, his loyalty. He deserved the right to live, the right to exist. He may be young and inexperienced now but there was nothing stopping him from reaching his potential if he continued on this path. Dazai was sure he’d get there in a few years’ time, even if he wasn’t there to witness it someday. Maybe he should try to stay alive until then, if only so Atsushi wouldn’t be sad over him not seeing how much he’d grown.

     Dazai let out a sigh and leaned against a nearby wall. When had Atsushi become so important to him that he was considering prolonging his tormented existence? It was made in jest but it was still a joke he’d never think about normally. He would be the death of him, either metaphorically or by his own hands. Honestly, if Dazai were to die via murder, he’d like his beautiful tiger to be his killer.

     How cruel yet fitting it is for death to love life.

#airi's writing #DazAtsu #Fanfiction #Bungou Stray Dogs #suicide tw

[saphirered]

First times reader x Caleb widogast?

Here you go I hope you like these ☺️

The first time you met Caleb you were making some coin on the side as a temporary barkeep at the Lavish Chateau gathering funds to book passage on a ship when they entered. You paid little mind to this curious bunch but couldn’t help keep staring at the redheaded man in fine clothes. There was something… different about him. He caught you staring and you hoped the earth would swallow you whole then and there to spare you the embarrassment. Carlos, your boss didn’t help and even made you serve them. The redheaded man kept his eyes on you probably put off by the weirdo that couldn’t keep their eyes off him. You’d never hear the end of this. And though you were soon to see through his illusions it did not change your opinion. Little did you know meeting this intriguing man, Caleb Widogast would bring trouble to your life to the point you were on the run from the law. Should you be upset? Angry? Maybe but perhaps you should have worded it more carefully when you said you needed passage on a ship… 

The first time you spend time alone together the Mighty Nein dragged you in pirate trouble a plenty finding yourselves on a true pirate ship as a guests… More like prisoners and you knew better than to not be on guard. You slept with one eye open and a dagger under your pillow. Caleb seemed to feel the same, well save for the dagger part which left you both awake at the same time more often than not. You had some heart to hearts or at least as much as you both could muster. Speaking the truth without revealing anything of worth seemed to be a talent you both possessed but over time you grew more comfortable around each other. There was an undeniable chemistry between the two of you. Kindred souls destined for each other as Jester called it gushing over how you two would be perfect for each other but neither of you were ready for something beyond friendship. It was that first open and unfiltered conversation that kicked all of this off.

You tagged along with the Nein after their return to the mainland having grown accustomed to their company. You wouldn’t call yourself part of their group but you liked their company so you’ll stay until they grow sick of you or until your path takes you a in a different direction. On the road it was time to take watch. You were usually on duty with either Yasha when she was present or Caduceus but that night the Firbolg really deserved a full night of uninterrupted sleep so you and Caleb took watch together. It was cold and you were freezing. Even Caleb had trouble keeping warm so you suggested what you were taught; sticking close together wrapped up in your blankets and sleeping bag with a Frumpkin spread out over both your laps. You had to admit that this arrangement worked quite favourable for all parties involved so it became a more frequent occurrence. 

The first time you danced together came as a surprise to you. You were celebrating in a tavern after successfully completing a job for the Bright Queen and Caleb may have had a little bit too much of that Xhorhassian ale. A band was playing an upbeat tone and before you knew it Caleb had pulled you off your seat and began spinning you around. You were caught off guard but apparently a drunk Caleb was a more open Caleb and you were all having fun so what’s the harm? He was quite a good dance partner even when intoxicated. You could only imagine what waltzes he could dance when sober. 

The first time you shared a bed together came as the aftermath of the drunken dances. With the Nein save for Jester, Caduceus and yourself were quite a few bottles in resulting in you three having to practically carry them to their beds and Caleb had already been sticking to your side like glue so you were hardly going to hand him over to the others. Besides, you were able to convince him that last glass was enough and maybe it would be best for him to switch to water instead so maybe you could convince him to sleep too. You helped him up the stairs his arm over your shoulder to support him as he kept humming the tune of the band whispering sweet nothings in your ear making comments about your eyes, your personality, your skills in battle but you took it as the words of a drunken man and just happily agreed with him. You didn’t mind after all. Eventually you got him to his room but getting him in his bed proved more difficult than expected to the point where he lost his balance and you fell with him and before you knew it you were stuck in his embrace with him leaning on you like you were his pillow. Telling him he’d probably sleep more comfortable on his own was met with disagreements. You apparently were much more comfortable than any pillow and blanket and he wanted you to stay. So you stayed making yourself more comfortable. 

The hangover morning got Caleb all flustered. Hundreds of apologies, him scrambling up awkwardly but eventually he did catch on you didn’t mind and he couldn’t deny he probably hadn’t slept so comfortable in a long time even if he did wake up with a killer headache. The rest of the day was spent in with a breakfast in bed and a hangover cure brew from your Firbolg Cleric friend. Though that didn’t take it away in its entirety so the two of you spent the rest of the morning and afternoon cuddled up together.

Cuddles are comfy and even though Caleb might be somewhat touch repulsed he loved your hugs and spending time in your embrace whenever he felt down, conflicted, was simply yearning for physical touch or no reason at all. You were happy to provide these cuddles whenever he needed them and he happily provided you whenever you needed them. 

Over time Caleb grew more comfortable with your touch and you with his resulting in the two of you sitting closer together and holding hands when no one noticed. You’d grown quite fond of each other and eventually had a conversation to figure out what this thing you have going exactly is and where you would place boundaries. Together you adjusted these boundaries many times to better fit your dynamic as it kept evolving but it took some comments from Beau about how the two of you were acting like ‘that couple’ and to ‘bone each other already’ that made you realise you were very much behaving like you were in a relationship so you thought why not? You were both comfortable with this so why couldn't you be? You had nothing to lose.

Your first kiss wasn’t the most romantic by Jester’s standards that is at least. No fireworks overhead or grand confessions of love. You were sitting together at the Xhorhaus looking over the city from the ostentatious tree on top of the house arms wrapped around each other in a comfortable embrace. You were the one to ask him not wanting to cross any boundaries as you both decided moving things slow was the way to go but he said yes. Your first kiss with Caleb was soft and sweet and everything you had hoped to be. It wasn’t grand and soppy like the kisses described in Tusk Love but romantic in your own way as neither of you were for the over the top expressions of love and affection. 

You’d been helping Caleb figure out a particularly difficult spell. Your eye for detail being exactly what he needed after weeks of trying and just not getting it right but you managed to crack the code, find the mistake and help him fix it. He lifted you and spun you around giving you a deep kiss. “I love you.” The sentence seemed to have slipped out but was genuine nonetheless so you kissed him back with an ‘I love you too’. From then on you both grew more accustomed to saying the words out loud and eventually even in the company of others which for the first couple times was met with gagging noises from Beau. 

The first time you finally addressed the elephant in the room about the two of you officially being in a relationship left Jester gushing over the two of you already halfway through writing an epic romance about the two of you. ‘The Barkeep and the Scholar’. ‘Drinks and Disasters’. She kept sputtering ridiculous names. Caduceus was happy the two of you finally opened up about your relationship as there was no hiding from him. Fjord and Yasha were happy for the both of you. Beau of course congratulated Caleb and bluntly told you she wouldn’t be afraid to make you disappear should you ever hurt Caleb but it was Veth who’s promised you bodily harm and worse if you ever hurt her boy because not even the gods could stop her if that happened. You had to assure her, vow upon your life that that day would never come and you loved Caleb too much to ever hurt him let alone to the point were you’d provoke Veth’s wrath. 

#critical role x reader #mighty nein x reader #caleb widogast x reader #caleb widogast #caleb-widogast-x-reader

[my-writings-and-musings]

Could you do Fort Max and First Aid for the oxygen loss?

Seriosuly loving it, angst and comfort/fluff is the best combination lmao

It is the best combination and those are two of the best boys so I am ON IT! Fort Max is in part eight listed below, but here's First Aid!

Part One: Here!

Part Two: Here!

Part Three: Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: Here!

Part Eight: Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: Here!

Part Eleven: You're Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

First Aid

·Ever one for new experiences, he'd been quite enthusiastic to have a human join the crew, and perhaps it was his penchant for thoroughly appreciating every unknown he came across that had led to your fast paced courtship. The bot had simply demonstrated an almost overwhelming fascination towards you from day one, and in short time the connection between the two of you had been discovered through his efforts. Now you were nearly inseparable. Off days and breaks are always used for bonding, and today is no exception. Atop his lap as he sits comfortably, you happily listen to his enthusiastic and commentary filled reading of a Wrecker's Declassified, loving how he has the most obvious and adorable starstruck look while doing so. You could listen all day just to see his schoolboy crush play out before you.

·For him, having someone who listens and values his opinions without hesitation is enough to get his spark humming. He's rather accustomed to being passed over for bots with more experience and fame, so seeing your eyes focused on him with such rapt attention is... well, it's just nice. Finding you exceptionally adorable doesn't make it any less sweet. Being human also means a great deal of his favorite topics are new to you, so he gets to introduce you to all the wonders of the Wreckers, something that he loves every moment of. It's also not unpleasant to have your tiny body close to his, practically snuggling against him... Cuddling is something more or less new to him as well, so having it at all is yet another wonder you've brought to his life. There's a vague hope in the back of his processor that he'll be brave enough to suggest sharing a berth someday, just for a nice nap together, as he's not yet been brave enough to ask such a thing of you.

·Unfortunately, the universe has very little respect for his plans. Accustomed to interruptions as an always on call medic, he can't help but be a little frustrated when Ratchet starts comming him out of the blue, but he knows better than to show it. Something serious must be going on if their CMO needs assistance. Still in your partner's lap, you watch as he answers the communication, quite used to sudden messages like this pulling him away. It's a part of dating a medic; but nothing about this seems standard. First Aid shifts his expression to one of concern as the voice comes through the comm in broken static, though he's experienced enough to put together what little there is. A warning of failing systems gets him moving on instinct, his arms scooping you up as he moves to stand, and the instructions to head to his emergency stations is almost unnecessary when the line goes dead.

·You're surprised but not offput by the sudden change in your position, if only because being swept into his arms is... very nice. That doesn't prevent you from knowing something is off though, and thankfully he is just as aware of you as he is his responsibilities as a medic, more so of you to tell the truth... A calm visor reflects your face as he lifts you close to relay the situation. Something is wrong with the ship, he explains, and it's bad enough that Ratchet made a preemptive call for medical bots to get moving. That means he needs to get to the medical bay, and before you can ask he brings up the possibility of you coming with him. Worry is just perceptible on his face as he hesitantly expresses that having you there would be safer, and thus he'd feel better... The bashful look is so cute you momentarily forget the danger to give him a reassuring kiss on his faceplate while accepting the proposition.

·Ignoring the stars you make him see with a tiny smooch, he gets right to work, securing you in one arm and ensuring his room is locked before heading out. He can't help but feel protective as he does so, almost like your guard against the threat that feels omnipresent in every hallway. You feel the same, and he can tell by how you hold him tighter in his grasp, something that stirs his spark with almost overpowering affection. It's enough to make him certain he'd fight like a Phase Sixer to protect you... For your part, a similiar drive to keep him safe is present, despite the difference in size between you. Hopefully you help him feel a little more secure as the two of you move through the eerily quiet hallways.

·The protective instincts First Aid has honed in his career as a medic give him a half second warning that danger is inbound, but all he is able to do in that time is curl around you protectively when the world seems to shake itself asunder. Hard floors meet his back in a painful rush, and you're similiarly jostled against him, though thankfully the worst of the blow is softened by his reflexive brace for impact. Tremors continue to rock the ship once you both realize you're on the ground, but a great cacophony of noise fails to die down when the shaking does. It's not a noise you've ever heard before; though you can compare it to metal being torn, the echoing and overbearing sound is at a scale you can't even comprehend.

·First Aid, having a natural coolness under pressure, is able to collect himself even as the situation continues evolving. The alarm begins to go off as he gets himself off the floor, and he notes that had it not the entire crew would probably still be mobilizing. There was no way anybot didn't feel what he just happened to be a front row spectator towards. While being on a ship of soldiers meant backup would soon be available, he had a few concerns that just couldn't wait for the guards to be scrambled. With one path to the medical bay now inaccessible, and you being so vulnerable, he needs to get somewhere safe to plan. He holds you close as the first open room becomes a makeshift shelter.

·Still reeling from the shock of everything, you find yourself atop a table in one of the Lost Light's many maintenance rooms, watching as First Aid attaches a portable operating flashlight to his helm. Before you can ask a single question the light is covering your body as he looks you over, asking for clarification on your basic functions while checking for injuries at the same time. Only when he's satisfied you're stable does the opportunity for speech present itself. Half expecting another massive tremor to hit at any moment, you ask what on earth made the ship move and sound like it had hit a Titan sized can opener, and his visor darkens with worry. You take hold of his hand to reassure and encourage him.

·The explanation is a bit rushed, but understandable; the ship has been ambushed, no doubt the enemy is preparing to board through the makeshift docking station they just created, and enemies will soon flood in... Also, most of the ship's systems appear to be offline. It's bad enough news that you feel suddenly woozy and need to sit back on your little table. Seeing you afraid drives First Aid into action, his processor working overtime to formulate a plan that will get you to safety, though admittedly the situation is a tough one. It's only when he takes proper stock of his surroundings and notes the monitor station that an idea takes shape.

·Intent on finding a clear path, he lays out his plan as he starts typing, explaining his thought process as he hacks into the virus addled program to get what he needs. Though you find solace in his confidence, the surprise from before is still wearing you down. Exhaustion seems to be the only thing you can truly comprehend... First Aid breaks through the enemy programs holding information back, but his victory proves short lived when the many systems start showing their current status, and his triumph turns to horror at one in particular. Critical to your survival, the atmospheric generators are among the malfunctioning systems. Oxygen levels are dropping by the minute. Without a word, he turns on the spot and begins looking you over again, earning a cry of surprise as he scoops you up.

·Alarmed and confused, you haven't a clue what might have spurred the usually in control bot to act so rashly, and have to sputter out the question when your clouded head fails to settle. Something like an explanation pours out of him, but there's very little you understand due to an increasingly sluggish mind. The growing exhaustion alarms him further. There's precious little time before you reach critical levels of oxygen deprivation, and the hypoxia has already rid you of the ability to process the situation... An ache in his spark is joined by one in his head as he tries to formulate a plan, and when he is left with only a long shot, he's forced to take it for your sake. There's a shake in his hands as he cannibalizes the room for parts, throwing together a makeshift air scrubber that will generate just enough breathable oxygen to get you to the medical bay. You smile as you watch him make it, suddenly too tired to stay awake but wanting to watch him craft, if only because his ingenuity is one of your favorite traits. The pleasant haze is still there even as he lifts you again to bring a makeshift oxygen mask to your face and begin running.

·All he can really do is hope, but there's precious little optimism in his spark as he makes the journey to the medical bay in a blind run, not running into enemies by sheer luck. The countless mistakes he's made so far are all that exist beyond your terrifyingly expressionless face. It's distracting enough that he's surprised when the team of Autobots appears from nowhere, particularly as Ratchet is amongst them, but before the CMO can say a word First Aid is pleading with the more experienced medic for help. He feels like a student on their first bad rotation in a hospital ward, facing the possibility of death for the first time, only a million times more agonized because you're on the line. The older bot is mercifully understanding as he gently takes you and guides him back to the medical bay, where he enters a fog and settles in to his job without conscious thought. He sees everything; Ratchet stabilizes you with proper equipment, wounded bots start to come in with news the battle is over, the systems maintaining the ship all come completely online... None of it registers.

·All he can think of is how he failed. The machine he built could have been more effective, he should have predicted oxygen issues from the start, and had he not been distracting you with his foolish interests to begin with... It physically hurts, but he doesn't allow himself even a moment of reprieve from the self admonishment, and dedicates himself entirely to your wellbeing. Every tiny facet of your recovery is microanalyzed, down to the thousandth of a percent. He won't risk losing you to more of his mistakes. It's bad enough that he doesn't permit joy to show on his face when you finally begin to stir, not even cracking a smile when your beautiful eyes finally blink open and you look into his visor. Your own expression, however, immediately shifts to one of exhausted but emphatic relief. Seeing the bot you love alive after the chaos you remember enduring is more than you could have asked for.

·He can't help but be incredibly gentle as he asks how you feel, his affection too strong to ever suppress in its entirety. But you can see the struggle in his actions, having become so accustomed to his presence that the out of character reservation is as obvious to you as a fireworks display, so you quickly ask if he's okay after everything that happened. The innocent question actually makes him flinch. Not a moment later he breaks and loses the calm air of a medic, collapsing into a nearby chair to confess that your injuries are his fault, caused by a myriad of failures he can't reconcile. Head in his hands, he's caught off guard when you make an effort to move from your little bundle of blankets and tubes keeping you stable.

·Before he can say a word to stop you, he is silenced by a little hand taking hold of his digit, and though the mask is firmly fitted you still speak loud and clear enough for him to hear the firmness in your voice. As lovingly as you can, you insist that he stop what he's doing. Loving him is worth any risk, but because he's as resourceful and brilliant as he is, you had made it through a situation most wouldn't have survived. The rest of the universe may not always see his worth, but you do every time you see him. Growing dizzy from the force of your conviction, you're gently shushed and encouraged to lie back, yet to your exhausted delight First Aid appears anything but pained as he works. Adjusting your blankets and tenderly ensuring your comfort, he doesn't need to say thank you through anything but his actions. As always, you've brought him back down from that exhausting despair he grappled with so often in the past. After all, he must be capable indeed to have earned the love of someone so wonderful and unique. The least he can do is show his gratitude in a gentle brush of his thumb over your palm as you drift back to sleep.

#transformers #maccadam #mtmte #more than meets the eye #lost light #idw #tf #ll #my writing #my asks #requests #prompts #human reader #self insert #first aid #first aid x reader

[awanderingdeal]

Summer camp AU - Chapter 5 - Remus

Finally an update to this! I found this chapter super hard to write for some reason. I hope you enjoy it!

CW: Food, implications of past toxic family relationships

Fic Rating: T

Please message me if you feel that any content warnings need to be added or the rating is not appropriate.

The characters in this fic belong to @lumosinlove and you should definitely go and check out her fics!

For previous and future chapters please see my masterlist

Remus moved tentatively as he climbed over Sirius, doing his best not to wake the other man. He wasn’t quite sure when Sirius had arrived, a vague memory of a muttered apology sometime during the early hours of morning surfacing, but he’d been asleep and barely registered it. He huffed a laugh at how Sirius had burrowed himself under the sheets, his inky black hair the only thing visible. The bed really wasn’t big enough for the two of them, and as much as Remus loved Sirius, his boyfriend leaked heat like a furnace. Still, soon the campers would be here and the two of them would have to set an example by not sneaking into one another’s accommodation so Remus savoured the company whilst he had it.

The air had already started to hold a damp heat when Remus stepped out, despite the amber hues of sunrise barely having lifted. A sweet breeze gave some welcome relief as he picked up a steady job, his muscles slowly waking to the chirping chorus of birds he couldn’t identify even with their daily meetings. Remus almost missed the flash of red hair hidden behind a tall pine tree, except for the hushed laugh that drags his attention away from a feisty squirrel he’d paused to watch. He rolls his eyes at the couple, an act he acknowledges is highly hypocritical considering the origins of his own relationship. The two kissed again, drawing the owner of the rough laughter into view and Remus startled. He peered closer, confirming his first observation - that was Kasey Winter, but the person he was with was most definitely not Natalie Darcy, Kasey’s girlfriend. Ordinarily, Remus would pretend he hadn’t witnessed anything, writing the situation off as none of his business, only both Kasey and Natalie were good friends of his. He pushed the dilemma to the back of his mind for now and pressed on with his run.

The work day had seemed unusually long, Remus learning the cruel lesson that even the most adored job became tiresome when you wanted to be somewhere else. Placing the final package of dressings in their drawer, Remus ticked the item off his checklist with a flourish. He looked around the nurses station, giving a satisfied nod and a self congratulatory smile; the place was really starting to come together. Now that he was finished for the day, Remus rolled his shoulders, letting himself relax.

Without the distraction of inventories and paperwork, Remus’ mind wandered to thoughts of Sirius. A phone call from a panicked parent needing reassurance the camp could, in fact, accommodate her child’s allergies had lasted long enough to result in him taking a late lunch, so Remus hadn't had a chance to talk to his boyfriend all day. He knew he could find Sirius in the drama studio, his phone having buzzed earlier with a message informing him of the fact Sirius would be there for the entire afternoon, only he didn’t want to alienate him from the other counsellors by spending all their time together. Traipsing back to the cabin to change out of his uniform, Remus shook off the doubt. There was a time for balance, but it wasn’t the day after your boyfriend reunited with their sibling after years apart.

Both Sirius and Heather jumped at Remus’s knock on the heavy wooden doorframe, the pair deep in conversation. “Oh, I believe that is my cue to leave,” Heather smiled, the expression settling something in Remus he hadn’t even realised needed settling.

“Thanks for all your help today, Heather.” Sirius accepted the broom she handed to him. “Both with this,” he continued, gesturing to the room around him, “and for the advice. You should consider a career as a therapist. Trust me, I should know.”

“Here I was antagonising over my future and Mr Sirius Black solved it in one afternoon,” Heather laughed, sticking her tongue out playfully. “It was no problem, way better than sorting out the games’ equipment shed, anyway. I can’t wait to see what your tiny theatre kids do in here.”

“They’re not tiny, they’re middle schoolers.”

“Exactly, middle schoolers. Tiny,” Remus agreed, stepping into the studio. It smelt of polish and other than a pile in the centre of the floor, any evidence of the years worth of dust that had been allowed to gather was gone.

“The key is not to let them know you think that,” Heather winked.

“This isn’t my first year, you know,” Sirius grumbled, his accent thickening the way it always did when he was even mildly inconvenienced, “Get out of here,” he shooed Heather off. “And talk to June! I definitely saw heart eyes this morning.”

“Well then, you need your eyes testing,” Heather retorted, leaving with a raised eyebrow and a peppy wave.

"Bonjour, mon loup,” Sirius sang, gathering Remus in his arms. At 5”11, Remus wasn’t even short, but Sirius could still easily prop his chin on the top of his head, albeit only briefly. A short breath of air left Sirius’ mouth, almost but not quite a laugh, and Remus found his chin being lifted for a kiss. "Come on, let's go and sit by the lake. I'll tell you everything."

Remus schooled his expression into the most innocent he could manage. "I was just going to ask how your day was."

"Sure." Sirius laughed properly now, the both of them stumbling slightly as he tried to nudge Remus' shoulder. "You're practically vibrating. Thought I was supposed to be the intense one?

“Sometimes it’s my turn,” Remus smirked, pointing out a large, flat rock in the distance that seemed like an ideal sitting place. Sirius nodded, letting Remus guide their slight change in trajectory to head towards it. “You know, you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to. I will always be interested in your life, but if you want this to stay between you and Regulus then I completely understand.”

Sirius flicked his gaze over to Remus briefly, the smile soft on his face. It reminded Remus of when they had still been dancing around one another. Long evening walks where their hands would brush, just barely. Looking back, he didn’t know how they had lasted so long before that almost inevitable kiss. One thunderstorm and two leaking roofs, that was all it had taken in the end. “I know,” Sirius shrugged. Those were the last words he said until they reached the low slab, a once rugged thing that had been smoothed out by a lifetime of exposure. Remus thought there must be something poetic in it, but he was too tired to figure it out.

The quiet lasted long enough for Remus to figure Sirius had changed his mind, playing their hands together as they looked out onto the water.

“They live in California now, they’re here to teach archery and they are non - binary,” Sirius breathed out the sentence, the words blending together and his accent thick, but Remus was practised enough to decipher them.

“California? That’s a long way from Montreal -” Remus toyed with the sleeve of Sirius’ t-shirt. “ - How’d they end up there?”

Sirius' face crumpled a little, quickly gathering himself. “They were staying with a friend of our family’s there, Severus. He always seemed nice, nicer than the rest of their crowd anyway, but it turns out he’s no different to the rest of them. Regulus is trying to get out of there.” A sheepish smile spread over Sirius’ face. “I might have invited him to live with us. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I should have asked first. They were just so worried and -”

“Hey,” Remus squeezed Sirius's hand. “I’m not going to pretend that a consultation wouldn’t have been nice, but it’s your house -”

“It’s our house,” Sirius frowned.

"The house was bought with your money and I can completely understand and appreciate why you offer a roof over your sibling's head without question."

Sirius played with the necklace, a silver lion, hanging around his throat. Remus lifted his hand to touch its twin, draped around his own neck. "Just like that? Even though I've spent every mention of them detailing how much they had hurt me?"

Turning to face Sirius more surely, Remus gave a comforting smile. "Do you trust them?"

There was a brief pause, but the "yes" that followed was sure and confident.

"That's good enough for me," Remus said. "Shall we go and join everybody for dinner? There's apple pie tonight."

Dinner ended up being the usual ruckus that Remus had become re-accustomed to over the past few days. He loved the way the dining room thrummed with the same energy that radiated throughout meals with his own family. Thomas and James' dares grew more and more ridiculous until Sergei barked at them that he wouldn’t allow them any more BBQ if they did not calm down.

“ -Yeah, so ma Maman had to come and collect me. I think I lasted 5 hours,” Jackson finished his grandiose retelling of his first experience at camp.”

“Nado!” Evgeni set his glass down with a heavy thud. Remus had learned the tall Russian man had the gentlest of spirits, but grace was not an attribute he possessed in large amounts. “Why you go to horse camp if scared of horses?”

“I was 8,” Jackson argued. “I had never seen a horse in real life. It just looked fun.”

Once the rippling laughter dissipated, the conversation evolved into useful hints of tips from those of them that weren’t new on how to handle similar situations with their own campers.

“Hey, Katie,” Remus leaned over Sirius to address the youngest of the Dumais’. She had only arrived yesterday along with her siblings and Sergei’s wife and children, but she’d made herself right at home, squeezing herself between Sirius and Logan, who she had declared her favourite, instead of joining the rest of her family at their table. “Can I steal Sirius please? I need to show him something.”

“It’s time for Katie to go with Anya back to our cabins,” Celeste interrupted. “Viens, ma chérie. Tu peux revenir demain matin.” Katie left with a pout to a round of goodbyes.

“What did you want to show me, mon loup?” Sirius cocked his head curiously.

“Nothing,” Remus admitted sheepishly. “I just wanted to get a good spot under the pavilion before everybody else finishes and comes outside.” Sirius rolled his eyes, letting Remus tug him into a standing position. During camp, the small structure would serve as a meeting point and could fit a dozen or so people in when they were standing, but it was pretty full with Sirius’ 6 foot 3 form sprawled across it, there wasn’t much space for anybody else, and this was Remus’ favourite spot. He could lie under the shelter, a little less exposed to the biting insects that seemed to love him so much and still see everybody on the green around them.

Soon, the space would be filled with eager children, and Remus would be constantly poised to treat the next ailment, but at the moment, he was content to watch this year's counsellors get to know one another better. He was an old hand at this now, however, he could remember the bristling excitement as his first training week had drawn to a close, the knowledge that he was soon to be responsible for people who didn't seem all that much younger than he was, both terrifying and exhilarating.

The sky had been threatening rain for hours now, and it finally fulfilled its promise.

“My hair!” Finn’s screech broke through the chorus of rain. The blonde boy, something in the back of Remus’ brain supplied him with the name Leo, immediately tucked Finn against his side, throwing his jacket over his head. Remus wasn’t sure whether their shaking was as a result of the damp seeping through their clothes or the pair’s laughter.

Remus had always enjoyed people watching, noticing the subtle intricacies of human behaviour when they didn’t realise you were looking, so he caught Leo’s small glance up at Logan just before he put some space between himself and Finn.

Finn wasn’t having any of it though, dragging Leo back to him, attempting to get the small jacket over the top of the both of them.

"Do you see that?" Remus lifted his shoulder, jostling Sirius slightly.

Sirius grunted, the annoying chime of the game he was playing sounding loudly as he progressed to another level. Remus had given up on complaining, and the repetitive nature of swiping candies across the screen seemed to relax Sirius more than it bothered Remus. "See what?"

Leo was standing now, his t-shirt soaked through and his hair plastered against his face in damp strands. Remus couldn't quite work out what he spluttered before walking off with long, quick strides, one last quick look at Logan as he went.

"There's something going on there,' Remus hummed.

"Stop meddling," Sirius laughed.

"I'm not meddling!"

Sirius turned a raised eyebrow on Remus and tucked his phone into the pocket of his jacket before pulling them both down so they lay on their backs. "Listen. I love the sound of the rain."

Remus knew he was being distracted, but the thudding rhythm of heavy droplets against the wooden slats of the rood was incredibly relaxing. Or at least it was until the sheeting downpour didn't stop and they had to dart through it, laughter heaving in their chests to meet the others in the large hall. Celeste sighed, bundling towels into their hands to dry off.

"Nice of you to join us, gentlemen," Dumo said, a guitar propped in his lap. "Take a seat. We were just about to teach our newcomers a few campfire songs. Sans the fire, of course. As two of our most experienced, maybe you could lead?”

“Je te hais,” Sirius grumbled.

Dumo ignored the declaration, and once they were seated he smiled. “Perhaps we will start with Everywhere we go?”

Despite an early reluctance from Sirius the sounds of the song were soon echoing off the walls, the group of counsellors enthusiastically answering Sirius’ calls.

Everywhere we go

Everywhere we go

People always ask us

People always ask us

Who we are

Who we are

And where we come from

And where we come from

So we tell them

So we tell them

We’re the Lions

We’re the Lions

The mighty mighty Lions

The mighty mighty Lions

And if they can’t hear us

And if they can’t hear us

We shout a little louder

We shout a little louder!

Dumo was lenient, taking over leading them through a few more songs himself until he faked a large yawn. “Well, it’s bed time for me. I’ll leave the guitar for anybody who wants to play. And remember, no matter how much we try to teach our campers such fun songs, they’d rather learn whatever routine is popular on Tip Top or whatever that thing is called, so be prepared!”

Logan commandeered the guitar quickly, holding it strong against his thigh and strumming it with a relaxed ease Remus wasn't sure he'd seen in the man before. He played through a few songs, others slowly filtering out as time went by until only a handful of people remained.

“Do my song, please?” Finn asked, eyes wide and pleading.

Logan shook his head, “Not here.”

Finn’s lower lip dropped into a pout and Remus saw the exact moment Logan succumbed to the expression. Remus didn’t blame him at all, Finn’s face bore an eerie resemblance to Bambi and only a monster could deny it.

“Fine.”

The slow chords started and the room quieted as Logan began to sing. It was more romantic than Remus had expected from the younger man.

And you can tell everybody

This is your song

It may be quite simple, but now that it's done

I hope you don't mind

I hope you don't mind

That I put down in the words

How wonderful life is while you're in the world.

Logan and Finn were so invested in one another that Remus wasn’t sure they noticed Leo slipping quietly from the room.

#sweater weather #lumosinlove #logan tremblay #leo knut #finn o'hara #natalie darcy #kasey winter #alex o'hara #celeste dumais #pascal dumais #sergei ivanov #sirius black #remus lupin #regulus black #dima krupin #james potter #lily evans #thomas walker #noelle tremblay #rating: t #cw:food #cw: toxic family