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roses-r-rosie3 · 4 months

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X-Mas list presentation

Batfam x M!Reader

Summary: instead of making a regular Christmas wishlist, the reader decides to make a whole presentation

Quote: “That is all Family! So open up your hearts and your wallets for me this holiday season”

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“Why are you here?” Duke asked Jason.

“Same reason why you’re here, y/n wanted us to all meet up in the living room for some announcement” Jason sighed.

After everyone was in the room, you pulled out your computer and connected it to the Tv, which made everyone confused.

“Hello family, I know you must be wondering why you’re all here” you said.

“Yes”

“Yup”

“Mhm”

“Yeah”

“Can I go back to my game now?”

“Last year you guys totally fucked up Christmas, so this year I put together an entire presentation to tell you guys what I want specifically” you smiled.

Everyone in the room let out an audible sigh/groan. It was known by everyone in the family that you were very dramatic from time to time (24/7). But they never thought you would get this extra!

“Is that really what you called us here for?” Damian grumbled.

“Would you shut up for a second?” You snapped.

“Y/n I don’t think that’s how you should be talking to your little bro-”

“Anyways, Here’s the things you should keep in mind when you’re thinking about what kind of gift you will provide for me this year” you said as you interrupted Bruce from his lecture.

“First of all, I’m the only one who knows how to reset the Wi-Fi, and yeah that’s threat” you threatened.

That certainly got everyone’s attention.

“Secondly, if you don’t get me what I want I will get a sugar daddy, I don’t even care what you guys are going to say, I’ve had so many offers for sugar daddies that it’s unreal. The perks of being son of Bruce Wayne I guess” you said.

“Y/n, you do know that Bruce is rich right?” Jason asked.

“Not the point” you mumbled.

“And third if I don’t get what I want, I will also sell my feet pics online like I did last year” you said calmly.

“YOU WHAT?!” Bruce shouted

“Calm down, I only ended up making about 1 million from it” you sighed.

“ONLY?!” Dick gasped.

“I created a three tier system of different gifting levels, basically, the levels equivocate to how much you love me and how much money you have” you explained.

“Level one is the ‘I’m going to need therapy level’ which is only four to seven gifts. I would probably go into a depressive spiral, actually not probably, I definitely would be depressed” you said.

“Would you stop being so overdramati-”

“I’M NOT DONE YET” you said as you interrupted Tim.

“What would that mean for us? You may ask. It would mean that you would have to pay for my therapy. And the money that you guys spent on therapy would have been basically wasted, you could’ve bought me a whole bunch of gifts right now and avoided the situation” you smiled.

“I think that he’s lost his mind” Bruce whispered to Stephanie.

“You think?!” Stephanie whisper yelled.

“Level two is the ‘You’re getting warmer package’ This basically if you love me- Bruce can you stop whispering to Stephanie” you scolded.

“As I was saying… Level two is eight to fifteen gifts, which is basically equivalent to you texting me happy birthday” you continued.

“Level three is the ‘You’re sleighing it’ level. And if you remember, you guys were just a bit off the mark of hitting this because you guys only got me twenty three gifts. And in order to reach ‘You’re slaying it’ you have to get me twenty five or more gifts, I think this is totally do-able for you guys, especially because you can just use Bruce’s card if you guys are running low on money” you said.

“I have tons ideas for you guys and this whole slideshow is already in your email so you guys can look at it and reference it at any time” you smiled.

Everyone quickly checked their phones to see that you indeed emailed them your whole presentation.

“That is all Family! So open up your hearts and your wallets for me this holiday season” you smiled before leaving the room.

“Yeah he had definitely lost his mind” They all said in synchronization.

“I HEARD THAT!”

#male reader #batfamily #batfam #batfam x reader #batfam x you #Batfam x batbro #batfam x y/n #batfam x male reader #jason todd x gender neutral reader #jason todd x male reader #dick grayson x gender neutral reader #dick grayson x male reader #bruce wayne x male reader #tim drake x male reader #tim drake x gender neutral reader #damian wayne x male reader #damian wayne x gender neutral reader #rosesrrosie3 #holiday special

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friendlyfoxpal · 4 months

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Rockin Around G/t

It's holiday time! Whether you celebrate, something else or not is cool. But this year thought it be fun to make a little something, and future some of my friends and mutuals!

Hope everyone has a wonderful day!

Featuring, Me, @dekameter @shortshifter @dolldays Amyanime, @starlust7 @verefex @aceandpals @diegogtrattyart @oathborngt-blog @waterlemonadegt @jetpolyart @keydekyie @azuldoodles

Music, Rockin Around the Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee

#g/t #my art #giant/tiny #animation #my animation #Holiday special #lots of friends and buddies!#mutuals

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autismdogg · 4 months

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Blue’s First Holiday (2003) ⛄️🐾

#blues clues #kidcore #2000s childhood #2000s nostalgia #nostalgiacore #blue’s clues #nick jr #holiday special #y2k nostalgia #nickalodeon #sfw agere #sfw agedre

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fleetways · 1 year

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Chapter 14: Preparations

get snowed on idiot

#sonadow #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #sonic the werehog #sonadow fanfiction #sonic fanfiction #mdlhea #holiday special #kind of not really but also its exactly that #wanted to have this on christmas sunday but sadly it needed a few extra days to proofread #oh well #enjoy!#chazart #hall of fame #mdlhea chapter

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shutupcrime · 1 year

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Other marvel directors:

And here’s five seconds of a queer character you will never see again

James Gunn:

Here’s Drax and Mantis getting blitzed in a gay bar at Christmas time 🌈🌈🌈

#also drax was definitely open to those guys hitting on him jusss sayin #gotg #guardians of the galaxy #tgotghs #holiday special #the guardians of the galaxy holiday special #Kevin bacon #drax #mantis #cosmo #rocket raccoon #james gunn #star lord #just the guardians being the gay avengers x

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gifs-of-puppets · 1 year

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Happy Hannukah!

#sesame street #once upon a sesame street christmas #hannukah #channukah #menorah #baby bear #papa bear #mama bear #curly bear #holiday special #happy hanukkah #happy chanukah #muppet #muppets #gif #muppet gif #muppets gif #sesame street gif #muppet gifs

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idreamofsleeping · 5 months

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WHERE ARE MY TED LASSO FANS I CANT BE THE ONLY ONE LOSING MY MIND OVER HANNAH WADDINGHAM’S CHRISTMAS SPECIAL

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ashleander · 6 months

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Pizzatober Day 31: Halloween Dance Party!

I can’t believe we made it! This has been a great journey. It’s been fun. Thank you everyone for the likes/comments/reblogs/follows across Tumblr and Twitter and for everything. Love you all! I got to follow and meet other artists!

I loved seeing everyone else’s interpretations for each of the prompts. This is the second Inktober I’ve ever done and I couldn’t be more happier. Thanks to Blackido for the template as always! It was a great way to get ideas because I wanted to draw more PT but I didn’t have ideas lul.

Hope all of you guys had a great Halloween! I’m gonna take a break from posting art for a week, I’ve been feeling tired from it but I had fun! It’s been a fun ride!

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acorndudesworld · 6 months

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Cartoon Network characters doing the Peanuts Dance is my new religion.

#cartoon network #cartoonnetvvork #cartoon cartoons #johnny bravo #courage the cowardly dog #dexters laboratory #sheep in the big city #the powerpuff girls #buttercup #ed edd n eddy #cow and chicken #early 2000s #peanuts #christmas special #holiday special

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lakefoundtheirexit · 5 months

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Currently rewatching Olive The Other Reindeer and this is honestly one of my favorite bits, cracks me up every time

#olive the other reindeer #christmas #xmas #christmas special #holiday #holiday special #humor #meta

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roses-r-rosie3 · 6 months

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The Vanishing Hitchhiker

Male!Oc x M!Reader

Warnings: Smut, Swearing, Blowjob, car sex

Summary: The Reader comes across someone who needs a ride in the middle of nowhere. One thing leads to another and the reader and the stranger end up hooking up. After the hookup, the stranger just vanishes….

A/n: Soooo because I sadly couldn’t do kinktober this year, I decided on making this Halloween special fic!

Quote: “I’m very sorry dude, we’re basically stranded”

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You usually had a late night drive when you couldn’t sleep, and today was one of those days. Today was really stressful for you, and it didn’t help that you couldn’t sleep, so you got off of your bed changed out of your pj’s and quickly headed out. You started your car and started to drive to wherever your heart desired.

Driving in the middle of the night was so peaceful for you. Not a lot of people would be driving, the quiet streets, and the chirps of random bugs outside were weirdly soothing to you. Everything was normal, up until you saw some random guy waving at your car. Usually, you would feel suspicious of hitchhikers but something in your heart was telling you to pull over, so you did. You pulled over next to the guy and rolled down your window.

“Hey, what are you doing out here at this time? Do you need a ride or something?” You asked.

“Yes please” the stranger said.

You unlocked your car and the guy hopped into the front seat. He put on his seatbelt and you started to drive again.

“So, do you know where you want me to drop you off?” You asked.

“The park please” the guy responded.

“The park? At this time? Are you sure you don’t want me to drive you home?” You said.

“Yes, I’m sure” the guy said.

“Okay then” you sighed before typing in directions on your phone.

You started to have small talk, you know the typical ‘how’s your day been’ ‘where are you from’ etc. But all of a sudden your car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere, and your phone ran out of batteries. That was weird, you could have sworn that you still had half a tank left, you had only been driving for fifteen minutes, right? And when did your phone die? You never got the %20 battery warning.

“Damn it” you grumbled.

“I’m very sorry dude, we’re basically stranded” you apologized.

“It’s fine” the guy said.

The guy was calm, a bit too calm. There was not an ounce of fear in his voice. Who wouldn’t be scared? You’re stranded in the middle of nowhere with a stranger you barley know. While you were thinking of a way to get help, you felt a hand start to rest on your thighs. You looked up and saw the guy, he still calm as his hands crept closer and closer to your crotch area. You would’ve stopped him, but it’s not like you had anything better to do, and besides the guy was cute.

When he finally got to your zipper, he leaned his head closer to yours. He slowly pressed his lips against yours. You noticed that his lips were cold, but then again he was outside for a while so you ignored it and gave into the kiss. But all of a sudden you moaned into his mouth as you felt his cold hands slip into your boxers and slowly start to rub your hardening cock.

You whimpered as began rubbing the slit of your cock. The stranger broke the kiss and he started to pull your trousers and boxers down to your ankles, freeing your leaking cock from its restraints. Without warning, he quickly took your cock into his cold mouth.

You started groaning in pleasure as the guy started to deepthroat your cock. It was like he didn’t have a gag reflex. You gripped his soft hair as he kept taking you fully, taking your whole cock in his mouth without making a single sound.

“P-please~” you whimpered.

Several moans escaped your open mouth as his tongue drew a long strip of saliva up towards the tip. Your grip on his hair was fighting as pre-cum oozing out of your slit. He hallowed his cheeks, as he bobbed his head up and down your cock.

Your gritted your teeth when the vibrations on your sensitive, leaking cock were becoming too much. Your last straw was when the tip of your cock started to brush against the back of his throat. Your hands grabbing his hair in fists as your hips bucked slightly off of the chair, and you came with powerful sprays.

You expected him to stop after your first orgasam, but he kept on sucking, causing you get hard once again. The sound of the guy’s sucking filled your car as he took your length down his throat. Your car windows getting more foggy the more the guy started sucking. It wasn’t long until your breathing was picking up its pace, and you felt the same tingling sensation beging to form in your groin.

“Mmm~ Fuck~ I- I- I’m gonna-”

You let out an embarrassing moan as you shot thick strings of cum into his mouth. You would think that even after your second release he would stop, but he just kept going.

“I-I c-can’t take it a-anymore. T-too m-much” you stuttered.

It had been what felt like hours and the guy still would stop sucking. You were way passed overstimulation at this point. Your cock was coated with cum and saliva. You could barley even speak, and your arms felt too weak to even try to push the guy off of your cock.

You had already cum nine times already and you couldn’t take it anymore. You let out a moan, and next thing you knew, you came in his mouth for the tenth time and you passed out.

When you awoke, the guy was gone, and your pants were pulled up. But most of all, your phone battery was at full percentage and you had a full tank of gas.

That experience was weird.

#male oc x male reader #top male reader #male x male #malexmale #mlm #male reader #mxm #gay #rosesrrosie3 #x male reader #oc x male reader #gay smut #smut #holiday special

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finalproblem · 1 year

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Happy Public Domain Day 2023: Sherlock Holmes is finally free!

On January 1, 2023, copyrighted works from 1927 will enter the US public domain. They will be free for all to copy, share, and build upon. These include Virginia Woolf’s To The Lighthouse and the final Sherlock Holmes stories by Arthur Conan Doyle, the German science-fiction film Metropolis and Alfred Hitchcock’s first thriller, compositions by Louis Armstrong and Fats Waller, and a novelty song about ice cream. [x]

See also: Sherlock Holmes and the Adventure of the Public Domain Character

#sherlock #sherlock holmes #canon #the casebook of sherlock holmes #public domain day #holiday special

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baambastic · 4 months

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Well that’s interesting. (2009 DCU Holiday Special)

#tim drake #robin #red robin #dc red robin #holiday special #dick grayson #nightwing #captain boomerang #dc #dc comics #batman #🐍

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kaspavanlortsyal · 4 months

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❄️✨Smutty Quaritch Oneshot - Christmas Eve✨❄️

CONTENT: Christmas!, I Wanted Quaritch to Wear a Santa Hat, Ribbons for Lingerie, You Are The Gift✨ AHA—, Light Bondage (with the ribbons), Gagged, Teasing, You Get Glazed like a Donut, Oral Sex (receiving), Vaginal Sex, Size Difference (per usual), Multiple Orgasms, Nipple Play, Fingering, Tit Sucking, if I had to write “If there’s one thing Miles Quaritch enjoys eating more than Christmas cookies, it’s your pussy” you have to read it, Sprinkle of Fluff.

Nobody wants to spend Christmas Eve alone. You were waiting a while. Almost too long—almost long enough that you considered sending him a picture of exactly what he was going to find on his bed—but finally, the door opens.

Quaritch’s glowing amber eyes narrow onto you. You’re laying on the bed, propped up on your elbows, and wrapped in thick army-green ribbon. Candles flicker on the beside table and the top of the headboard is wrapped in twinkling lights that cast seductive shadows across your body.

The colonel reaches for you, but you stall him with a look and nod your head towards the Santa hat on the corner of the bed.

He huffs a laugh. “Really?”

You bite your lip and grin.

“Fine,” he muttered, snatching the hat and tugging it on, careful not to trap his sensitive Na’vi ears. It was a little small, but that added to the charm.

Quaritch grabs your ankles and slides you to the foot of the bed, tail swishing in anticipation. “What a pretty present,” he murmurs, fangs flashing with a wicked grin. “All wrapped up for me, huh?”

“Merry Christmas, colonel,” you say.

His long blue fingers brush the edge of the ribbon snug against the top of your breasts, tied with a large bow in the centre. Your nipples peak the shiny satin as a shiver shoots down your spine. There’s a matching bow between the dimples in the small of your back.

Quaritch pulls his shirt off and tosses it aside. On cue, you undo the large buckle of his belt. You take your time, fighting the desire to touch as much of him as fast as possible after dreaming about this moment all day. Judging by the stiff bulge in his cargo pants, you’re not the only one, but he stops you before you reach the zipper.

“My turn,” he says.

He tugs one side of the bow holding your breasts and watches hungrily as the ribbon falls away. Part of you is annoyed that the hour you spent tying yourself up /just right/ is unravelled so easily, but those thoughts fade as the colonel kneels before you and flicks your nipples with his rough tongue. You arch and gasp, locked in place with his hands on your hips.

Your fingers tangle in his cropped hair and the fuzz of the Santa hat as he sucks your tits into his hot mouth, his tongue continuing to work the rosy bud as his teeth scrape your tender skin. His breath tickles your collarbone as he pulls you in, tasting you like a man starved. His attention travels from your breasts to your neck, inhaling the sweet vanilla perfume as he nips and sucks.

“You’re like a god damn Christmas cookie,” he grunts.

He devoured the batch you’d made earlier this week. “Gonna eat me too?”

“Damn right.”

You squeak as he tosses you back on the bed. The mattress dips under his weight as he crawls on top of you, caging you within his powerful limbs. For a moment he simply studies you, your breasts gleaming with his saliva and half-unwrapped. Then, Quaritch smirks and picks up the discarded ribbon. He brushes the soft fabric over your skin and watches the goosebumps form across your flesh.

You close your eyes and arch, thighs squeezing together. He takes his sweet time teasing your flushed skin with the feather light touch of the ribbon, teasing over our belly and chest before up your arms. You don’t notice that he’s looped the ribbon around your wrists until he pulls it snug, shackling you to the headboard.

He chuckled as your eyes fly open. “Don’t give me that. I think this is exactly what you had in mind,” he tells you, leaning down and kissing his way down your arms.

You couldn’t deny that. A moan escapes you when his mouth finally meets yours, the kiss deep and full of promise.

Quaritch’s knee parts your thighs and you whimper at the delicious friction. He lets you grind against the thick muscle of his thigh as he slips his hands beneath you and unties the second emerald ribbon. He smirks upon finding the section that falls away from your needy cunt already wet with desire.

“Open up,” he instructs, and slips the damp ribbon between your teeth, gagging you with it before you can protest. The sight of you tasting yourself as he ties it snug darkens his eyes with a more carnal desire.

Deciding he’s going to taste you too, the colonel pins your knees to the mattress and parts your slick folds with his tongue. His groan of satisfaction reverberates through you. You strain against your bonds with building pleasure as his devilish mouth works on you, arching. Muffled by the gag, your moans fill the room, mingling with the sloppy attention of his mouth.

If there’s one thing Miles Quaritch enjoys eating more than Christmas cookies, it’s your pussy.

He sucks your clit until you shudder before soothing you with greedy licks. Covering your entire cunt in his fanged mouth, he lets you grind against his tongue until your pleasure soaks the blanket. He kisses the puffy lips of your pussy as you ride through the aftershocks of your orgasm, almost reverent, and nuzzles the flat bridge of his nose against the apex of your thighs. You squirm and whimper, already aching for more.

Quaritch slicks two fingers on your pussy and pushes them deep into the burning heat of your core. He curses under his breath at the unbearable tightness and pumps his hand slowly to relax the quivering, silken walls.

You want to beg for more, to insist you’re ready to take him, but the ribbon pressing against your tongue betrays you. You can only moan and hook an ankle around his neck, pulling him closure, desperate.

The ribbon binding your wrists doesn’t budge. Of course he knows how to tie a damn good knot, being marine a and all. The burning strain in your shoulders reminds you just how much power he holds. You want him to unleash every inch of himself upon you. You were his Christmas present, after all.

Quaritch sits back on his knees and wipes his chin on the back of his hand. As he removes his pants, you strain your neck to glimpse the thing you’ve been craving all day. He adjusts the santa hat, securing it. You giggle breathlessly around the gag.

He rests down on you, smirking at how your body tenses when his member brushes your inner thigh. Your moan of impatience is almost animalistic as he rubs the head of his cock between the wet lips of your pussy, lubricating his ribbed shafted in preparation.

He kisses you, then pulls back just enough to watch your expression as he thrusts his hips.

You scream around the gag as his alien cock forces its way into you. It burns like sweet fire as the walls of your cunt stretch to fit him. Your back arches as he works his way deeper with each thrust, hissing at the sensation of your tight sex gripping him, sucking him in.

It’s far from the first time he’s fucked you this way, yet every time you’re not sure you can take it. He pants and grunts as he ruts into you, the head of his cock pounding your cervix. You can’t scream his name so you settle for wordless moans that grow to hoarse cries which each slam of the headboard.

The colonel grabs your hips and lifts your lower half from the mattress, growling as he brings you down onto his cock, again and again. He’s tense with concentration and a thin sheen of sweat gleams gloriously upon his striped skin.

His relentless pace doesn’t stop as your mind shatters and another orgasm bleeds through you, white hot fire spilling out from your core into every nerve and fiber of your being. You’re vaguely aware that he keeps going, growing closer to his own release in your spasming cunt, but for a moment all you know is weightless pleasure.

Quaritch drops you to the mattress, leaving your thighs to tremble on either side of your ruined pussy as he fists his cock. Hot, glowing cum coats your stomach and tits in thick ribbons as he roars his release, tail lashing through the air behind him. The bioluminescent dots of his skin flicker.

You tilt your chin up, whining softly.

Chuckling, Quaritch tugs the gag down and kisses you. The white pompom at the tip of the santa hat tickles your forehead. He drags the ribbed underside of his cock over your overstimulated clit and you shudder, twitching away.

After a long shared shower and another round beneath the steaming water, you find yourselves curled up in bed amid the twinkling lights.

Wearing the Santa hat once more, Quaritch produces a small gift from beneath the bed. He hands it to you wordlessly as his fingertips trace your bare shoulder.

You frown and tear open the plain wrapping paper and reveal the present. It’s a pair of fuzzy pink socks.

“I thought we weren’t doing gifts,” you protest, caressing the buttery material.

“Yeah, well, your feet turn into damn icicles at night and I’m tired of you warmin’ them up on my back while I’m sleepin’,” he says.

You smile. You can’t help it, not as he fails to suppress the hint of softness in his tone. “Thank you.”

He catches your chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Your gift, though?” he smirked, and kisses you. “Outstanding.”

Happy Holidays, Simps!

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thanksjro · 5 months

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Transformers Holiday Special (2015) — Wishing You and Yours a Delightfully Secular Wintertime, Containing Absolutely Zero References to the Birth of Christ

Despite what some might like to think, Christmas isn’t for everyone; even with all the commercialization, at its heart, it’s still about the Baby Jesus. You can tell that we haven’t shaken the Christian connection, because the cover for this special issue has the father, the son, and the holy spirit, which is hidden behind the company logo.

And if Rodimus doesn’t stop screwing around, his resurrection’s gonna have to happen a lot sooner than Easter.

Because this is a comic special, things are going to be a little different. Instead of one standard-size issue, we’re getting three mini-stories, each with their own writer (from each of the comic runs that were publishing at the time) and artist. Our stories are listed here:

Don’t worry about what Ultra Magnus is up to behind that text.

Now, you may ask, why on earth am I covering this issue, which is a specifically Christmassy one, now, when it’s not currently Christmas? Well, according to Roberts, the story “Silent Light” takes place after MTMTE #49, and #50 is when the crew manifest for the Lost Light gets shaved down some, so realistically, this is when “Silent Light” happens in continuity. So I want you to keep in mind that Getaway’s Christmas isn’t going so great.

I won’t be going back to catch up on the other runs’ plots, as the Christmas stories are stand-alone.

Getting into it, our first story is:

Penned by Mairghread Scott and drawn by Corin Howell. We open up on a cityscape featuring a happy sun and some eye-searing narration boxes.

I went to Howell’s Twitter to see what her deal was, and was greeted with a banner consisting of a sexy succubus lady with her boobies out, so I’m going to assume she simplified her style for this issue, since mecha are hella difficult to draw.

Also, I hope you like the structure of How The Grinch Stole Christmas!, because that’s what we’re getting for the next little while, complete with chunky, white text on painful-to-view red.

Our story opens with all the transformers from the colonies visiting Cybertron and making friends with each other. Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts, which pisses off President-King Starscream to no end. Being the drama queen that he is, Starscream feels that everyone should be paying attention to him 24/7 and feed him grapes as he reclines on a sofa, because hasn’t he done enough for all these sorry sacks of shit? He hasn’t even caused a war, unlike the last guy who was in charge. Bumblebee (who is a ghost) tells him to just be fucking nice for once in his miserable life, but Starscream wouldn’t be Starscream if he could settle down like that.

Our god-king of the planet calls for his aide, Rattrap, who is going to be in his alt mode for the entirety of this story, to help him set up for a public broadcast addressing his need for attention and adoration.

He sends Rattrap off to deliver the tape to the news, which seems to consist of two very sleep-deprived individuals. Because they’re apparently the only two robots stupid enough to attempt to cover the nightmare hellscape that is Cybertronian current events, the last bit of Starscream’s tape is cut off when one of them falls asleep on the switchboard. This turns Starscream’s personal worship holiday into “For the Love of God Be Nice to Each Other” Day. Everyone takes to it beautifully, getting BFF tattoos, going on vacation with their husbands, hugging in the straightest gay way possible, holding parades, giving each other bombs, and getting absolutely shitfaced.

Starscream, distraught that nobody is giving him the emperor treatment like he had wanted, sulks in his twin bed, then moves to his dinky little throne as the night wears on, making the most miserable faces he can the whole time. Eventually, Chosen One Day ends, and he’s been completely ignored. Very sad.

Then, there’s a knock on his door, and Starscream creeps over to the peephole just in time to be smashed flat by Wheeljack slamming the door open. Last time we saw Wheeljack he was assumed dead by most, and floating in a tank at Starscream’s behest. He’s gotten better since then, clearly.

Wheeljack came with friends— the entirety of the main cast for Windblade/Til All Are One, to be exact— and they’re here to make sure that Starscream isn’t completely alone on this friendship holiday he accidentally invented. Everyone toasts to his good, totally intentional idea, and Starscream decides against killing all of them for at least the next 24 hours.

Now pay attention to this next story, because it’s actually canon-relevant, because of course Roberts would write a holiday special mini-comic that ties into his overarching plot. Fucking nerd.

Our artist for “Silent Light” is Kotteri (or Kotteri!, as it’s been written on some of their other publications) the pen name for Ikumi Fukuda. Kotteri is primarily a manga artist, having created their own works and well as working on other projects. I admittedly can’t find much on this person, not even their preferred pronouns, TFWiki itself using “they”, which I will default to. All of the info they’ve provided themself is, of course, written in Japanese, but even running things through a translator only proves that information to be purely professional. Their personal Twitter is protected, and my follow request was never answered, as far as I know. There’s a fan Twitter account for their art that claims “she”, but I have no way to verify, and I don’t want to assume anything based on art style, because that’s sort of shitty. Let it never be said that I didn’t do my due diligence here— I fucking hate using Twitter.

We open with Rodimus having just returned from Meteorfest, a festival where you surf on meteors and avoid your co-captain and SIC’s calls like the putz you are. He’s greeted by said co-captain and SIC decorating assembling a Christmas tree cloaking machine and finishing each other’s sentences like an old married couple. Rodimus tries to deny the existence of Minimegs, then we get our heavy-handed and lampshaded explanation for the crux of the issue. Megatron handles Minimus like a baby doll as the two of them explain that the Lost Light is about to hit Mauler territory.

Maulers are notorious for wanting the Cybertronians dead, but Megatron is too much of a macho man to pussy out and go around them. So instead, the crew will be hiding in special sleeping pods that will mask their spark signatures, and pray to their pantheon of gods that no one notices the ship the size of Manhattan. Brainstorm has like fifteen new inventions, despite being on house arrest from his lab. Megatron’s autobot badge is wearing a hat. Merry fucking Christmas.

Over at Swerve’s, it would appear that everyone’s favorite television junkie is closed for business, as it’s just him, Nautica, and Whirl, sitting on the floor getting absolutely shit-faced on subspace-filtered engex. This might’ve been an issue, as folks are supposed to be bedding down in their B.E.D.s for the next leg of the trip, but Swerve slipped Magnus some Bing Crosby earlier so they’re cool right now.

There’s a banging at the door, and Whirl decides to answer, even though it’s not his bar, because if it’s trouble come a-knocking, it was probably looking for Whirl anyhow.

When Whirl answers, however, it’s not Magnus having caught wind of Nautica disrespecting the Autobot code, but an entirely different flavor of problem.

Now, I know that thing Whirl’s holding looks like a fucked up Hitachi Wand, but it is, in fact, an entire-ass baby robot. It seems that when Cerebros (Fortress Maximus’s friend, if you’ll recall) sent the engex through the subspace, this infant Cybertronian (Luna One-ian?) got mixed in with the other supplies.

We learn a bit about how baby Cybertronians work before we remember, oh right, this kid is gonna get everyone killed if they catch wind of her spark, since there isn’t a B.E.D. for her. Yes, it’s a girl! Congrats to our three idiots on their Cybertronian gender non-conforming little princess.

They gang decides to shunt her back through the subspace hatch, so they head over to where it’s currently being housed— the office of Ultra Magnus. Nautica, using her wits and all the tools in her arsenal, smashes the window to the office and they break in. The empty Magnus Armor sits in the dark like a grim monument to being married to your job. Whirl informs Nautica how to comfort the baby that he super for-sure doesn’t care about, handing her off while he uses his titty glass to replace the window in the door. Swerve tries to bite through iron chains holding the subspace hatch hostage, only to be stopped by the sound of justice coming down the hall.

The gang, of course, looks suspicious as hell standing stock straight immediately in front of Magnus’s office, but Minimus rather likes the change of pace out of these goofy morons, and is maybe also trying to deflect his embarrassment at being caught performing his own personal karaoke. He sends them off to their B.E.D.s, and it looks like all’s well that ends well until Whirl asks where Sparky is.

Yes, he named the baby.

Don’t worry though, he’s totally not attached or whatever.

Nautica, in her panic to not be caught stealing/vandalizing/using equipment she doesn’t have the clearance for, stuffed Sparky in the Magnus Armor. And also put the helmet portion back on the body, for some reason. Anyway, it looks like our little princess is gonna be a load-bearer when she grows up, because Magnus is up and looking for hugs. Nautica, a paragon of level-headed thinking in times of crisis, handles this in the best way she can.

And that’s a wrap on Minimus Ambus! Let’s give him a hand, folks! And let’s also give a hand to the new Ultra Magnus, Miss Sparky Whirldòttir! Where did that little scamp get to, anyhow?

Swerve nominates himself to be the one to drag Minimus to a B.E.D. to sleep off his concussion, leaving Whirl and Nautica to track down the baby.

The scene changes to Megatron announcing a last call for beddy-bye time on the intercom, just as Ultra Sparky enters the room. She looms over Megatron, putting him in a very compromising position as he hits the intercom button with his arm. Rodimus, climbing into his own B.E.D., wishes that his co-captain and SIC would stop being gay for, like, five minutes, or at least wouldn’t do it where it can be broadcasted throughout the whole ship in audio format.

Whirl and Nautica come save Megatron from the onslaught of physical affection, stating that “Magnus” has had a bit too much to drink. Megatron orders them to bed from his fetal position on the countertop.

It’s bedtime, but we still haven’t figured out how to get the kid back to Luna 1 so the Maulers don’t super-murder the whole crew. Nautica leaves Whirl to figure it out, getting into B.E.D. and wondering who the fuck knocked on the door in the first place. Whirl tells her not to worry about it and to go to sleep, so he can be the one to deal with this mess.

Whirl, notorious for doing all the nastiest jobs— former Wrecker, intended bullet sponge for the time travel situation, attempting suicide via Megatron— is going to add another tally to the list labeled “Reasons My Peers Don’t Really Like Me All That Much”, by throwing an entire baby out the air lock.

However, Whirl is being written by Roberts, who would never allow the number of robot babies to go down, so Sparky’s adorable assimilation of Whirl’s signature physical features gets him right in the soft underbelly he swears doesn’t exist.

Wow, Roberts put a baby in that robot. Surely this is as overt as we’re going to get with this imagery, since we’re in a major publication and not some fan-fiction!

ANYWAY

Whirl wakes up in the Medibay, emptied of infant and freaked the hell out about it. Velocity— who I will remind you is basically the only medical doctor on the Lost Light, since everyone else is too busy getting railed by weeaboos and joining unethical polycules to do their actual jobs—informs him that his daughter is, in actuality, a massive colony of scraplets that combined to look like a newborn.

It turns out that Nautica is a bit of a snitch, having spilled the beans after she woke up. Whether or not she thought Whirl had thrown the baby out the air lock isn’t really addressed, but thank god he didn’t, because then we would have had to send everyone’s favorite gun-addled dipshit to jail for the rest of forever. Checking security footage revealed who the mystery knocker was— it was the scraplets, forming the shape of an arm.

When Nautica asks how the hell they all survived this, seeing as Whirl kept the murder baby, Whirl informs her that he cut off power to his own spark to allow everyone else to live, including his sweet baby princess, winning him a #1 Dad mug, and also several emails from Rung to please make an appointment with him.

Whirl’s miracle Christmas baby lied and stole with the intent to murder everyone on board, and that makes her the ultimate daddy’s girl.

I hope you’ve all enjoyed this canon-important holiday special story about Whirl becoming a father.

In our third and final story, it appears we’ve been transported to Whoville, by the talent of our MTMTE Season 1 colorist, Josh Burcham. Within Whoville resides Anna Log, a human woman who owns two turbofoxes and sleeps in full military body armor on her couch. The wall in her living room suddenly explodes, revealing a late-night visitor.

Motherfucker, you are supposed to be on the ship right now.

Mega-Claus fusion-cannons Anna Log, and we cut to a film noir office where none other than Thundercracker has his feet up on the desk. The art grayscales for this section, as he narrates that he’s a detective. He’s wearing a fedora. It’s January 7th. He has a mysterious past and probably thinks that makes him very sexy.

The phone rings, cueing Buster, Thundercracker’s puggle, to put on her own fedora, and the two go to see the crime scene, where Thundercracker is the same size as a normal human man and wears a trench coat.

It turns out that Anna Log is the director of security for the entirety of planet Earth, which is sort of a big deal. When Thundercracker and the cops look at the security footage, they see who did it— Santa Claus, played by Megatron himself. Fucked up.

Sure, pal.

Thundercracker must now fly to the North Pole and kill Santa, because that’s how the law works. He transforms, flies by Club Penguin and a Coke commercial, reflects on his job, and then gets ready for a fight with Santa’s security measures, as Busters glowing nose warns him of incoming danger. She’s very talented, Buster.

Thundercracker makes quick work of the cybernetic security reindeer with his twin energy katanas and Buster’s jetpack. He kicks down Santa’s door to find the jolly elf himself standing in the dark, potentially rabid. The two start kung-fu beating the shit out of each other. It should be noted that this Santa isn’t the Megatron Santa, who shows up behind the two as they brawl, but rather original-flavor fat man Santa. How Thundercracker didn’t notice this isn’t addressed.

Thundercracker demands to know why Megatron dressed up as Santa Claus to commit a murder— the murder part made sense, Director Log and Megatron would be diametrically opposed— and Megatron reveals the greatest slight against himself he’s ever known.

Framing Santa for murder ain’t exactly gonna turn that coal into a diamond, Meggy baby.

Thundercracker clocks Megatron, he becomes besties with Santa Claus, and they ride a flying tank into the sunset. Thus ends Thundercracker’s most brilliant writing project yet, which he was reading to Marissa Faireborn this entire time.

Marissa isn’t terribly impressed, poking holes in all the little nonsense bits, while also not feeling thrilled about having been killed off in the first two pages of Thundercracker’s book. While the two argue, Buster and Ayana Jones make a Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown! reference together, and the issue closes out with a big ol’ Autobot symbol, even though Thundercracker was a Decepticon, Ayana and Marissa are humans, and Buster is a goddamned dog.

Thus ends the Holiday Special. Up next, more direct story progression!

#transformers #MTMTE #holiday special #jro punches me in the face #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #comic script writing

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