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sapphicwhxre · 3 years

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your first time | HCs

what your first time having sex includes (for anon)

Г includes : hermione granger, draco malfoy, harry potter, ron weasley, ginny weasley, pansy parkinson, fred weasley, george weasley, luna lovegood, cho chang, fleur delacour, nymphadora tonks, bellatrix lestrange, and narcissa black

♡─

hermione granger

♡─

actually researches everything she can to make it good for you (which ends up working really well)

is such a nervous wreck about making it perfect that you have to remind her

"it's with you, it'll already be perfect"

uses terms like vagina until you straight up tell her you're comfortable with dirtier words

foreplay QUEEN

does absolutely everything in her power to get you as wet as possible before doing anything

to the point where you wonder if you'll cum before even fucking

is already asking you what kinks you wanna try at this point

doesn't shut up but she's complimenting you the whole time

gets really encouraged + turned on whenever you moan

clingy, grinning mess after

asks you immediately what you want her to do better next time

♡─

draco malfoy

♡─

cocky, cocky, cocky

secretly really nervous but still plays it up

will not let you top

returns anything you do

doesn't stand for you being quiet

he will do everything in his power to get you as loud as possible

also doesn't take his eyes off you at all ─ like he wants to memorise every second of it and every inch of your body

pretty rough but instantly softens if he thinks he hurt you or something

won't cum until you do

tells you how hot you were after

teases you for cumming for him like that wasn't the intended goal

acts non chalant instead of telling you how head over heels he is

♡─

harry potter

♡─

harry is CURIOUS and no one can tell me otherwise

you're the one that has to tell him it's ok to touch you and he goes all out once you do

wants to do everything, touch you everywhere

actually wouldn't be able to get over you or shift his focus from pleasing you

"these are so pretty", "i love this", "say my name again", etc.

you probably have to pull him away at some point if you want to actually touch him ─ or fuck

absolutely shook when do you touch him

tries to stay quiet until you tell him you wanna hear him

then he won't shut up with the babbling and the praises

wants a second round as soon as you finish

♡─

ron weasley

♡─

thanks to hbp, we know how inexperienced ron is

so don't expect him to get actually kinky the first time

sure, he wants to go all out with you but he's actually really gentle

accidentally tries something in the moment (like choking, degrading, basically any kink) and apologises

then can't believe the experience actually gets better when you roll with said kink (and enjoy it)

slows and asks if you're ok the whole time

and every time you say yes, he gets really encouraged

doesn't even want to pull away when you're done ─ basically never wants to take his hands off of you again

heavy breathing and huge grinning right on your skin when you're done

having a snack together after because it's cute and he's all worn out so

♡─

ginny weasley

♡─

effortlessly sexy

honestly gets you going without even knowing it (you're done for when she actually tries)

she's really casual but sweet

definitely confident

puts her hair in a ponytail so you can see her face but still grab her hair

can't stay serious for shit ─ she's so happy and makes sure you know it

absolutely teases you if you stare at her

"its like this is the first time you've seen me naked!"

voices how turned on she is and how hot she finds you

forces herself to keep her eyes open because she wants to see you come undone

gets as many orgasms out of you as she can

sits on your lap and plants all these little kisses on your face when you're finished

♡─

pansy parkinson

♡─

"y/n and i are going to fuck, you should all be jealous" "oh my gods pansy,"

only a little nervous ─ she's more excited than anything

starts to confidently tells you about her daydreams, fantasies, and wet dreams but ends up blushing really hard

gets to work immediately

assumes she's topping but is actually willing to let you if you'd like

cocky, teasing, and sweet the whole time

goes for dirty names right off the bat

doesn't miss a beat when you cum, "baby 'm gonna take you against the wall now"

keeps going even after she gets tired

finally stops once you're both mindblown and unable to walk

falls asleep naked with you, head in your hair, mumbling about how she has the best s/o

♡─

fred weasley

♡─

will pick you up/drag you/etc. to wherever you're doing this

excited as fuck but wants a safeword first and foremost

probably makes it something really stupid

you can barely get anything other than moans out once he starts touching you

gives you kisses, talks dirty, fucks you as hard as he can... he goes all out

just to make your first time the best you've ever had

focuses on giving unless you want more

softer during the second round but way kinkier ─ the boy likes trouble more than work but he's still a quick learner

slow, tired makeout when you're both worn out and him spooning you

♡─

george weasley

♡─

also really excited

has already figured out your kinks at this point through conversation cues and imagined making you cum with all of them

won't stop kissing you, saying stuff like, "ready to cum for me baby?"

SWOONING banter, "so long as you fill me up love"

confident + teasing about it

"fuck, how did you know i like that?" "a weasley is always prepared y/n," "didn't you forget to wear shoes to class last week?"

absolute gentleman

makes sure everything's ok with you

knows how to get you hot and bothered without being too rough

grunted i love yous

pulls out of you once you're all fucked out but keeps you close so he can give your forehead wet, praising kisses

♡─

luna lovegood

♡─

so ready to do this

tells you really non-chalantly how bad she wants you

also a queen of foreplay

undresses you so carefully and slowly, telling you how gorgeous you are

long kisses

open about her kinks, asks straight up what yours are

locking fingers while you fuck and agreeing to only let go if one of you wants to stop

spoiler, your hands may as well be fused together by the end of the night

coaxes you through her moans and checks on you

even though she knows ─ and trust me, she KNOWS ─ you're having the time of your life

wants you to lay on your back after you cum and plays with your hair + swirls her fingers on your skin from her comfy lil seat on your waist

♡─

cho chang

♡─

sweet over sexy first time

nervous at first that someone's going to walk in but once she starts touching you, the whole world disappears

lots of blushing and giggling

nothing too serious ─ your legs are tangled and you're just heart eyed

plants kisses all over you the whole time

actually loses herself with you

like eyes scrunched shut and looking like an angel

if she didn't want to see you all pretty and moaning so bad, she'd probably keep her eyes closed and just be happy with how good you feel

whispers the cutest but dirtiest shit

so smiley when you cum

gets pouty if you pull away or stand up after

wants to cuddle, skin to skin, and keep giving you kisses

♡─

fleur delacour

♡─

wants it to be perfect

wears the prettiest lingerie she owns

sets a romantic scene

physically and verbally

trust me when i say this girl is a romantic goddess when it comes to words

pulls out the french and tells you how beautiful she thinks you are

magic touch ─ her fingers are stroking and caressing you during everything and it feels magical

during this first time, actions > words

barely says anything

other than moaning your name

quietly praises you under her breath but says it louder if you tell her to

just really sensual and passionate

holds you in her arms and kisses all over your neck and shoulders when you finish

♡─

nymphadora tonks

♡─

"love, are you sure you want to do this together?"

the second she has your full comfort and consent?

she goes wild

fucks you a thousand different ways but is being so sweet with her words

respectful yet dirty, complimenting in the sexiest tone you've ever heard

wouldn't want to do anything too kinky the first time

only because she wants to leave you wanting more

(as if you won't already ─)

definitely loses control of her hair colour in the moment

it just feels so good that she can't help but go bright and vibrant

all bubbly and talkative when you finish + gets herself together and changes her hair back to your favourite colour

♡─

bellatrix lestrange

♡─

lays out all her kinks that first time

goes absolutely wild in bed

covers you in sloppy kisses and hickeys

moans shit like, "i have been thinking about this since the moment i laid eyes on you,"

loud the whole time

possessive pet names

my doll, my love, my pretty little thing

melts the first time your hands are in her hair

(whether they're pulling at it or running through it)

won't say anything about it but looks for cues that you're comfortable and enjoying it as much as she is

doesn't stop until you're completely worn out

lays on your chest when you're done

and falls asleep mumbling praises

♡─

narcissa black

♡─

tease

wants to stretch out your desire before you do anything for as long as she can

long kisses, hooked fingers, etc.

and when she does fuck you?

respectful queen, looks at you for consent before trying anything

stays serious but if you let out a little giggle, she indulges it because she's just as excited to finally be doing this with you

knows what she wants and expects it

she doesn't stop coming up to kiss you

tells you how good you're doing the whole time

makes you cum as many times as she possibly can before finally letting go

doesn't let go when you're done ─ she wants to stay close to you, hot breaths and juices mixing while she kisses the top of your head

─────

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hyunnows · 3 years

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love, [Y/N] | jjk

► PAIRING: Jungkook x reader

► CONTENT/WARNINGS: angst, mentions of fluffy memories, mc death, lots of Jungkook tears, best friends!au, mentions of unrequited love

► WORD COUNT: 2k+

► RATING: pg13

► SUMMARY: "It’s not fair that he was holding the last of you in his hands, unable to focus on anything other than the last words he’ll ever receive from you."

↳ A/N: I got this idea at 2:36 am and I don't know where it came from but oh well. This was meant to be a 300-word blurb and we ended up at 2k lol. I haven't written anything for Jungkook compared to Tae, and honestly, this maknae has been climbing my bias list so here's a semi-self-indulgent fic filled with angst and crying! I hope you enjoy it, please feel free to leave feedback and reblog! Also, STREAM BUTTER!

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Shaking with fear, Jungkook gripped your hand tightly, tears pouring out his red eyes as your patient monitor fluctuated slightly. With a quivering lip, he croaks, “C'mon [Y/N], wake up. For me? Please…”

He feels your small fingers squeeze his own gently, weakly, and hope beams across his face. But just as soon as the hope had come, it vanished, your paling fingers going stiff in his palm. The once steady beeping now a quickly accelerating sequence, the sound ringing in the brunet boy's ears as his eyes go wide and breath cuts short.

He feels the nurses pull at him, trying to drag him out the room and he thrashes against them, his nails digging into your hospital bed with all their might until his knuckles turn white and his vision blurs. Loud sobs rack through his body as he slumps in the nurses’ arms, pressing the balls of his palms into his eyes, trying to stop the tears and the burning. His cries almost choke him, the occasional cough jerking his body harshly.

When he sees the familiar face of the doctor, he prays that the downcast gaze and frown don't mean what he thinks.

“[L/N] [Y/N],” Seokjin takes a breath, his own eyes beginning to water at the words he's about to utter, “time of death: 2 am… I'm sorry Jungkook. I did everything, I-I tried every voltage and pumped her with liquids a-and everything I could d-do—I couldn't save her. I'm so—so sorry.”

It's like his entire world has crumbled in a second. His arms and chest are suddenly heavy, his lips, throat, and face feel dry and dehydrated, and his eyes can't decide if they want to be open or closed because of the stinging sensation they feel when he tries either. Sitting on the floor in front of your room, he takes the hand Jin outstretched and wobbles inside, only to fall back down the moment he sees your dull figure.

He doesn't care that a small crowd can see him babbling incoherently as he tries to apologize to you through his sniffles and whimper, crawling to your hand and lacing his fingers through yours.

Eventually, Taehyung and Jimin pick him up and drag him out of the building you took your last breath in. Jungkook didn't try to resist, knowing he was in no shape to put up a fight or drive himself home. He needed to get out of there anyway, the smell of death only he could detect suffocating him slowly.

On his way upstairs, Taehyung holds him back, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a short stack of envelopes—maybe two or three—rubber-banded together and hands them to the younger. “Her first day in the ER, she m-made me promise to give you these if she—if she… You know…”

Hearing they were yours, he takes them gently and swiftly, immediately holding them close as if they were his lifeline. He gives Taehyung a silent, stiff nod before turning and dragging himself to his room.

He doesn't open them right away, taking his time to admire your adorable calligraphy and observing every smudge or erased pencil mark you'd left on their light material.

He's not surprised to find every letter addressed to him, because it wouldn't be the first time you two had given each other messages the old-fashioned way, and he smiled softly at the “before you read” attached to the first envelope.

If you're not Jeon Jungkook, please don't read these. If you are, know that I'm still with you, in these letters, in your heart, our memories and that I will always be here, even though I'm sorry I can't physically be here with you right now. These are letters I've written to you, but never sent. They're from the bottom of my heart and they say everything I've ever wanted to tell you.

—[Y/N]

His heart beats harder as he opens the first letter, doing his best not to tear the envelope and keep it perfectly intact for him to save.

There are two Polaroids safety-pinned to the letter, both with his face and yours smiling brightly at each other. He gently unclips them, tucking them safely into the [Y/N]-specially decorated sleeve. He breathes in deeply and unfolds the letter, immediately tearing up at your handwriting on the wilting paper.

Dear Jungkook,

I know you don't think it's cool or modern to send letters, so I won't send this.

Anyway, I want to thank you for always being there for me, my big, strong, human-shoulder-tissue. I couldn't be luckier than I am to have you as my best friend.

And I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I love you more than anyone or anything in this world. You're the diamond to my sky, the sun to my earth, and the person I would choose to spend the rest of my life with.

In other words, I'm in love with you, Jeon. I wish you were in love with me, but I'm already the happiest girl in the world being by your side every day.

Your Best Freind,

[Y/N]

His heart pounds against his ribs, because you had been in love with him. You had wanted him to be the last face you'd ever see. You were right in front of him, your heart on your sleeve for who knows how long, and he hadn't known until you were dead. His face contorted into one of pain at the reality, and he squeezed his eyes shut to stop the tears, taking long, shaky breaths before opening the second letter.

This note is considerably newer than the first, its edges still white and crisp, but the deepness of the creases tells him it's at least a few months old.

Dear Jungkookie,

Lately, I've been sick—which you know because I've told you. I haven't told you about my feelings yet because I don't want to scare you or pressure you, but I'm probably going to die before I ever get to tell you these things.

Since I told you how I felt in the last letter, I'm going to try and describe why in this letter. Reason number one, your presence. You always manage to just enter a dark, tense room and make it so much brighter and more comfortable. I don't know if it’s your smile or your laugh or the way you don't care if you're embarrassed or not, but you just manage to make everyone feel comfortable in themselves.

Reason number two, your kindness. I had never seen someone run back inside, get an entire table's worth of food, and give it away before. You're always so willing to give, despite the cost. I hope you never change.

Reason number three, it's kind of odd but I fell in love with your voice. Not just the way it sounds pretty when you sing, but the way it has the power to comfort whoever you’re singing to. I’ve always been able to come to you for support and comfort.

Reason number four is you know how to turn a bad day into a good one. You can talk to anyone who’s down for five minutes and you’ll turn them into a giggling, grinning mess.

Reason number five, you’ve always made me feel loved. Even though our entire relationship has been platonic—at least on your side—you’ve always checked up on me, held me, and made sure I knew I was enough and I can’t thank you enough for that.

Number six is your passion. You always put your all into everything you do. Be it making breakfast for the boys or helping me with a project I put off until the last minute, you make sure it’s all or nothing.

Seven is that you taught me how to love unconditionally. I always believed in falling in love and finding the one, but I never knew how intense it felt to be able to give your all to someone and not expect a single thing in return—until I met you. From the way your nose scrunches when you smile, to how you tilt your head when you’re confused, I love it all. From the best thing about you to the worst, it’s all you, and I wouldn’t want you to ever change. Every scar and blemish, each pore and lash, I’ve fallen in love with all of them because they make you, you.

I know you don’t feel the same, and in complete honesty, I love you so much I don’t even care. As long as you’re happy and I’m able to spend as much of my time by your side I’m happy.

He chokes on a sob when he finishes the second letter, tears dampening the card stock as he shivers. His heart clenches harder as he folds it back up, giving both pictures a once over before pinning them back on the letter.

Opening up the last envelope, a cry racks through his body, and he’s ugly crying now. The necklace he’d given you perfectly washi-taped against the letter. He pulls it off, tucking it tightly into his palm, and holds his breath. This time, the letter is a small, short piece of paper folded in half once.

He almost can’t read your small, dainty handwriting through his bubbling tears, but manages.

Hi Jungkook. Did you see the necklace?

It’s the one you bought me for my fifteenth birthday, that I told you I had lost. For a while, I had, and I remember I was too scared to tell you, but you noticed before I could anyway. I was so relieved you weren’t mad at me because I didn’t know what I would do if you were. I still don’t.

Anyway, the point of this short, last letter is to tell you how I want you to remember me. I don’t want you guys to think of me as your sickly friend who died when you were in your twenties… but I want you to remember the good memories we made together. I want you to remember the day we met, when I accidentally broke your bike and when we were both grounded for four months for sneaking out of our houses for our first party. I want you to remember how we got sick together because you couldn’t let me walk home alone in the rain, but you couldn’t drive and we both forgot jackets and umbrellas. I want you to remember the day you forgave me for losing the most precious thing anyone has ever given me, because that’s the day I fell in love with you.

This paper’s running out of space so I’m going to wrap this up. I want you to remember everything good about our time together, and not what ended it. Don’t think about how I’m gone, because I’m still with you, after death. These letters, the photos, and this necklace are what I’m leaving behind for you to keep. Don’t cry when you think of me, don’t think of the fact that we’ve been making our last memories, just don’t forget me.

Jungkook clutches the necklace tighter, afraid to drop it. Not only had he lost you, but he’d also missed out on the opportunity to be with you because he’d been too scared to ask you out while you were alive. He’d been in love with you since you two were eleven, tried to confess to you when you were fifteen, and lost you at twenty-three.

It’s not fair, he decides, it’s not fair that your love never got a real chance and it never would. It’s not fair that all these years you thought your feelings were one-sided when he reciprocated them ten-fold. It’s not fair that he was holding the last of you in his hands, unable to focus on anything other than the last words he’ll ever receive from you.

He sucks in a deep breath, barely croaking out your sign-off, “Love, [Y/N].”

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tiffdawg · 3 years

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Hey Tiff, here for the mod mfk game 😊

I'll try and make this short! I tend to babble. Apologies for the inevitable.

I'm INFP-T (mediator). When I originally took the test, I sent it to all my female friends to take because I wanted to know their types 😂 (I didn't think my male friends would give a sh*t).

I hold strong opinions, I know my faults, I find it hard to ackowledge my good traits, I've been through a fair deal of trauma and abandonment (lol), I deal with my baggage through humor (and lots of therapy, too), I used to see myself as a poor sad girl but have grown to see I'm far more than that (thank f*ck), I swear daily but probably less than I did when I was a teen (and I had a filthy mouth then), I dealt with the death of a close relative at a fairly critical time in my mental development and so I think I have a fair view on death and how to comfort someone going through that, if they desire it from me. I am quite proud of how present I was for that relative when they were dying, even if I didn't truly understand what they were going through, at the time, I hope they were comforted by me spending so much time with them.

Less dark sh*t: I love to sing, even though my voice is shrill and can actually pierce my ears at times (so I try not to do it around others ((like it took 4 years to sing infront of my partner!)). I'm infatuated with the filmmaking process and general processes behind creating worlds on screen and page. (I was around 8 when I asked for my first prop replica as a birthday/christmas gift. I just love props and the work and detail that goes into making stuff for sets/costume etc. That's like thee subject that will get my passion fired up all the way. I buzz.) I can be really dumb, something that's developed with age. My mind will just omit information when I'm trying to form a sentence or reference to something. It's probably down to poor concentration (and one summer I smoked a bunch of weed every other day.)

Umm yeah. I f*cking love coffee. I can have up to 4 a day (either just black or a soy cappucino). It's one of my only dirty habits, really. (I rarely drink alcohol, smoke, or take drugs, bar that summer.)

When I was younger I took a couple of psychology courses 'cause ain't the brain fascinating? The subjects I got high marks on, in high school, were Literature, History, Creative Arts, and Science. I sucked at maths but was placed in a higher intelligence class because I was in those for other classes and the timetables for lower sets clashed (it honestly sucked. Like my tutor even said 'you shouldn't be in this class'. Thanks dude!). I dropped out of college because I had severe PTSD, and am yet to go back 👎I don't think I want to.

I have a couple of tattoos. I prefer the summer to winter. I love house plants but I'm terrible at keeping them alive. If I'm travelling somewhere where the main language isn't english I will learn that language! I have an extensive vinyl collection. I'm annoying.

I'LL SHUT UP NOW SORRY I AM SO SO SORRY FOR THIS DUMB INFORMATION THANK U FOR READING I BET YOU PAIR ME WITH FRANKIE. I USUALLY GET FRANKIE OR DIN 😂

Ezra + Rivals to Lovers

You and Ezra first met while harvesting gems on a small moon. Two loquacious leaders on competing teams, neither were surprised when the confrontation ended in a shootout. Despite your past and the nature of life as a floater, you held your head high and held strong morals. You didn’t compromise for anyone. Especially not a sharp-tongued man with wicked intentions.

The fifth time you crossed paths with Ezra, you noticed the blade of your knife had left a white scar on his cheek, marring his handsome features. Pride swelled in your chest. And the smirk on his face told you he knew exactly what was on your mind.

It went on and on like that for years. Your heated encounters became a regular occurrence and even as he tried to kill you, he was perhaps the only reliable person in your life. You tried and tested each other, pushed the other to their limits, and offered a tether for your wandering souls.

Somewhere along the line, things changed. In the most inopportune moment on a planet with a toxic atmosphere, your breathing apparatus malfunctioned. Fate was not on your side, but Ezra was.

As you laid on your cot one night in your run-down pod, you realized you hadn’t run into the prospector for a few months. Your heart sank in your chest as you imagined all of the things that could’ve happened to him. You lived a dangerous life. Loosing people, friends and rivals alike, was expected. Something you were well accustomed to. That was why you kept yourself so closed off and kept everyone at a distance. So how did Ezra, of all the people in the galaxy, have such a hold on you?

You sat in a canteen aboard the ship taking you to your next harvest, pushing around the food on your tray with your fork. Your mind was elsewhere as you desperately tried to plot a new course for your life as you knew you couldn’t do this any longer. You didn’t even look up when someone sat across from you until you heard that familiar, deep baritone.

“I have missed you, birdie.” Your head snapped up. Eyes never settling, you took him in, not able to believe that he was real. That he had returned to you. With tired eyes, a few new scars, and only one arm, he looked… well, he looked like shit. “Might I inquire where you are headed next in this vast and ever-expanding galaxy?”

“Somewhere warm,” you said with what voice you could muster. “Somewhere safe. Somewhere… with you.”

You held your breath as you waited for his answer, prepared for rejection. Surely, after all these years contently at each other’s throats, you’d misread the situation. He hummed a little as he nodded thoughtfully, but the glimmer in his dark eyes gave him away. A smile pulled at your lips.

“In all my years, I have never struck such a fortune as the day I met you,” he grinned.

#tiff answers #anon 💌#fanfic game 💞#please don’t send any more requests in! im just finishing the ones sitting in my inbox

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chocolate-parfait · 4 years

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Congratulations on the 300! I see you do matchups?! (I really hope this is the right inbox, I'm still new to this) Could you do one for me (Mixed matchup IkeVamp, IkeSen)? INFP-A, like drawing, cooking, reading, writing, languages (translator to be), sarcasm, traveling, dogs. Don't like unnecessary drama, people disturbing my peace. I'm straigt forward and don't like but can be very confrontational but that rarely happens (no one wants to witness this). Unpaid therapist of all my friends. Thx!

Thank you, sweetie! Hope you enjoy~

I match you up with... Dazai!

Dazai is one of the few people in the mansion who enjoys his peace and tranquility, so aside some teasing and clowning here and there he won't be causing too much of a ruckus (unless Ai-chan is involved~)

Your relationship with Dazai evolves pretty slowly. From two acquaintances who exchanged basic greetings and made small talk every now and then, you slowly became friends who chill together while quietly enjoying the other's company, only to turn into a deeper relationship after various syntomps typical syntomps of the phenomenology of love took root in your hearts. Despite a comfortably unhurried evolution and what some may deem as just fleeting and superficial attraction, your feelings are actually genuine and strong. You and Dazai were able to find the perfect balance that not many couples are able to achieve; neither of you forces the other into something they don't want to do, and you can safely call the each other out without fear of hurting or offending, confident in the mutual respect and understanding you both have of the other

You can spend hours sitting together side by side in complete silence, only the ticking of a clock or a little bird outside comfortably filling the background. You read a book and he writes his newest novel or vice versa. Sometimes it's just one snuggling against the other in search of warmth and affection. It's extremely domestic and Dazai literally LIVES for it

Your romance falls into a steady routine that gives Dazai the impression of leading a completely normal life, just like any other man, finally free from all the doubts and sorrows that used to torment him back in his human days. As if the constancy of such lifestyle wasn't enough, he's also got you to fix up whatever trouble may pass through his golden orbs. You're always there to hear and help him out, and you're also the main reason why he was able to break free from his self destructive mentality, and knowing that you can live a happy, safe life just by being with him brings him ungodly amounts of joy.

One particular night you two had a semi-fight. During that period Dazai was already pretty much always on edge, despite concealing it pretty well behind his usual smile, but when the moon is high in the sky people are more vulnerable, and his remorse and self hatred all came flowing out at once. He absolutely didn't expect your reaction. For the first time ever since you arrived at the mansion, he saw fire burning in your moonlit pupils. Your usual serene tone slightly lowered to a much more aggressive and harsh pitch as countless words came out of your pretty lips. With each sentence you destroyed every one of his qualms just like a knight would cut down his enemies to save his princess. By the end of your discussion he was shocked and amazed to find how you had literally flipped everything upside down and gave him much to think about. A new perspective, things he ignored too much and others he cared too much about. After that night Dazai's usual behavior changed considerably towards you. You could now clearly feel the genuineness behind his smiles and gazes, the softness in his voice and movements when addressed to you. It was the spark that ignited the flames of your love.

Your favorite dates vary from strolls around the city to him teaching you Japanese. He has never taught a language to anyone before, but by having such a receptive student as you makes his heart swell with pride and he wants to try harder for your sake! He's actually on cloud nine ever since you asked him to teach you his native language. The fact that you want to get to know his country and a big part of him better means a lot to him, and it does nothing but strengthen his love for you

Dazai loves animals!! So even without pleading too much he'll agree on adopting a dog if you want one. He's going to take great care of it and you will often see him petting him while quietly babbling on various topics as if the poor creature could understand him

Second choice: Mitsunari

As the resident angel of Azuchi becoming friends with him was no difficult task, as he already trusted you with his life the moment you became a part of the Oda Forces. Additionally, he truly admires your kindness and care for others, so much that he can't help but happily praise you with the biggest smile on his face. Barely even a week passes and you already find yourself watching after him as you remind him to eat, sleep and maybe even breathe. Hideyoshi is extremely grateful as he finally can take it easier and not worry too much about the young man (he still does nonetheless, trust me)

On your part, hating Mitsunari is basically impossible, and even though your sarcastic retorts completely fly over his head (in return you gain Ieyasu's sympathy), spending time with him becomes the most natural thing in the world. Before you know it, you find yourself looking forward to being with him and your heartbeat confirms your suspicions. You may or may not have fallen in love with someone from the Sengoku period and the realization is a scary one. What will happen to your family and friends back home? And what about your dream job? But then that handsome smile, those vivid amethyst eyes full of tenderness, that soft voice that caressed your ears leaving pink warmth on your skin; it all came crashing down on you, leaving no other room for doubts.

If and when you confess him about your past and what had brought you to Honnoji that fateful night, you'll see the fires of an incredible passion taking ahold of his usually placid irises. He cannot fully explain with words the endless facets of what he's feeling, but he'll lock your hands in a tight grip and earnestly try to let out as much as he can. He vows eternal gratitude to you, the one who gave up everything for him, he who does not deserve such loyalty but decides to live up to the sacrifice you made. This new side of Mitsunari renews the love you felt for him, and at the end of his speech, in order to seal such an important promise, he kisses you on the lips, fiery and passionate

Everything escalates from there, and anyone in the castle can see how much close you two got in the blink of an eye. The moment you announce your relationship you get submerged from congratulatory blessings and gifts, even from a very grumpy Ieyasu who doesn't let this opportunity to slip in an ironic comment here and there

You may have given up on everything you had, but Ishida has no intention of making you regret choosing him over the rest of the world. If you're vocal and direct enough about your needs and wishes, he'll try to spoil you rotten at the best of his abilities. Your feet hurts? He's going to carry you bridal style to your bedroom to give you a two hours long massage. Headache? He's already in town with Hideyoshi to buy the best infuses for your head. He's very dedicated and it's very surprising to see him so active and attentive. If he starts getting too overwhelming the only choice you'll have is to explicitly tell him to tone it down a notch or two (please give him cuddles later, baby boy just wants to help)

Knowing about your love for travel, he makes sure to take you with him each time an inspection in a domain comes up, though he'll firmly refuse in case he deemed it to be dangerous. If something were to happen to you right in front of his eyes, he'd blame himself for 500 years and even more for not being able to save you. This is actually one of his biggest worries and from time to time he'll have related nightmares that cause him to wake up with a start, soaked in cold sweat. Take him in your arms, snuggle against his chest or cradle his head against your beating heart and most of the job will be done. If you happen to be concious enough and hear him out, console him with firm words of reassurance, press a kiss to his lips and he's going to be out like a candle in no time at all

Mitsunari is fascinated by the foreign languages you speak! You must have put a lot of time to learn all those exotic-sounding words, and he asks you to teach him a word or two. He's a fast learner and his brain has plenty of space to store whatever you say to him, and although he might cutely stumble every now and then, you're pretty surprised at the enthusiasm he's showing for your passion. He's going to take you to the tenshu to discuss with Nobunaga about a possible occupation involved with languages, and in no time at all you're already on your way to Nagasaki to discuss some deals with European and Asian merchants

#my writing #answered #matchups #300 followers special

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c-atm · 4 years

Text

Night time routine

Steven yawned as he walked out of the shower, feeling refreshed as he dried his hair with the hotel towel.

"Already passed midnight." He tossed the towel onto the bed before laying down himself. With a sigh he took his phone Into his hand smiling at the lock screen of Connie on one of her college tours.

It was a simple picture. She was wearing one of his old blue T-shirts under a blue sweatsuit, her hair in a ponytail and some circular lenses shades on her head, a new style she picked up, it fit her. Her grin was a wee mischievous and behind her left index, as if she had a secret for the one taking the picture.

It was adorable, all in all.

He typed in his code and headed straight to the messenger app, clicking on the name 'berry❤knight'.

Roaming⭐: Hey Connie, just

got into my latest hovel.

How are things on your end?

Steven rested the phone down on his bare chest as he looked at the ceiling of his room. The lights were off but the window was open giving the area a moonlit blue.

"She's probably asleep, actually what time is it over there?" He sighed. He reached to put the phone on the end table when "Home Sweet Home." ranged from his phone. With a grin he turned over the phone to see a candid picture of Connie taking a sip of Durian juice as she brushed her hair back and read with a request for a video call below it.

He accepted with gusto.

a few seconds passed before Connie appeared on the screen. "Hey."

Steven could feel his cheeks blazed at the sleepy tone of her voice and the drowsy smile on her face. The messy eye shading bed hair, The blue straps and the slight cleavage peeking from her light blanket didn't help either.

"You're turning pink. You OK?" She teased.

"Pssh! Ha ha. I'm fine." He kissed his teeth. " You're cute tonight..Adorable even."

"Yeah, I woke up like this, literally." She chuckled.

"Aren't we a natural beauty."

"Have to be. I never know which man of the night might call me." She grinned

"Oh! You're popular huh?" He smirked. "Bet you have your own fan club."

"I get my stares, but the only one that seems to catch my eye, is this cute little bedazzled belly button boy." She sighed dramatically "He's such a catch and always calls me at night. It's unfortunate that I have a boyfriend."

"The same one who is traveling?"

"Um-hum." She nodded. "I get so lonely."

"Well, let me keep you company for the night." He chuckled, "Since you like it so much."

"See you're trying to make me go back on my boyfriend." She bit her lip.

"Naw, nothing like that." He licked his upper lip. " Still, what you vagabond of a boyfriend don't know, not gonna hurt him."

"Pfft! You're so bad, Biscuit." Connie laughed..Only to get a small plush thrown at her.

"If you two are gonna flirt through the night, please keep the laughter down, Ni'. " A tired and grouchy feminine voice came from Connie's left.

"Sorry 'Tricia." Connie whispered before throwing the plush back with a chuckle.

"Tell Patricia I said hi." Steven said through a smirk only to hear her groan in response.

"You got her mad at me." Connie accused with a playful pout.

"I'll make it up to you when I see you. Promise."

"Make it up to us too" Patricia commanded.

"Us?"

"Daniel's here."

"Yo." A groggy male voice answered from Patricia bed, followed by the sound of a kiss and Patricia's giggling sigh. "Good night guys." it was a few seconds before the slight sounds of calm breathing could be heard.

"They're cute" Steven stated

"I know." She sighed. "So, my beloved Biscuit. What's up?"

"Nothing, really. Just checking in. What time is it over there anyway?"

"2:22"

Steven sucked in a breath. "Sorry.. it's 12:22 here, didn't mean to wake you for your sleep."

"Don't apologize. I was asleep for like ninety-minutes, plus don't have any morning classes tomorrow. So you're fine.." She hummed teasing. "Especially with what you got on."

"You mean my…." He gasped dramatically, "sweatpants?"

"Oh yeah...You look sleepy sexy." She pursed her lips as she nodded in approval,

The two held back a laugh to keep from waking the other two up.

"You really do look good, though." She admitted with a smile.

"You say that every night."

"As if you don't?"

"It's true though." Steven retorted " I got me a college hottie." He stated with pride.

"Pssh! That's nothing, I got me a worldly hunk."

"Got me a gorgeous, genius, gamer girl."

"Got me a vivacious, venerable, vagabond."

"Got me a sculpturesque, successful, stimulating, superhuman."

"Sculpturesque?" She gave him a flirtatious smile and spoke with a voice to match "... Someone upped their vocabulary on the road.."

"I picked up a few things, here and there."

"You gonna have to show off then."

"Indeed." He gave her a small adoring grin. "How was your day?"

She shrugged. "It was nothing to talk about…Classes are going alright. No problem there."

"Bu~uuttt."

"Hehe..Boredom." She sighed "The days are starting to run together." She gave him a wink " Lucky, my nights are fun."

He scoffed jesterly.

"Hey,I'm serious, you punk…"

" Really hearing about how I drove somewhere and found some ducks or talked to someone about coins is interesting to you."

"Immensely." Her eyes shined as she stated her truth, before smiling gently." Hearing about your day..is the best part of my day."

Steven's face glowed at her touching words. "I feel the same." He smiled. "I'm always amazed about what you're learning at college, what clubs you're joining, what your studying...It all seems over my head, but the way you passionately describe your subjects. It's so intriguing in itself.It seems more like story than a discussion"

"Biscuit…" She swooned. "You really enjoy my babbling."

"I love it. I could listen to you babble bout everything and never get tired...I'd make a whole symphony of your babbling if I could." He praised seeing her smile. "Especially, because you seemed so happy to do it. Your bright smile, make me just want to hold you tight and let you talk for hours."

"Now you know how I feel when I hear your regaling tales of the road."

Steven rolled his eyes. "Oh yes, who could forget the great desert-tire incident, or the night of the hole in the ceiling and we'd be remiss to not mention the omelette action at the 'might be OK' corral."

Connie giggled at his uninterested tone. "Hey, I really like the omelette story." She relaxed and grinned." I like all your stories. The way you tell them, makes it so." Her grin fell to an admiring smile "Your voice changes when you switch from one part to another, the way you inflections matches your emotions and quote the people you met, the way you talk with your hands at certain events. Your stories are nightly musicals to me...My nightly private one man shows...and the best part...The part that means everything to me."

Her tone got a bit more serious as she breathed out. " It means you're doing fine and Steven...You don't know how much that means to me..To know that you're out there discovering the world, making mistakes, meeting people. Finding out who you are and handling yourself… It makes me proud... not just of you, I've always been proud of you" She shook her head. "There I go babbling...But..yeah."

"Connie?"

"Hmm?"

Steven breathed deeply giving her a pointed and loving look. "I'm proud to be with you..."

Connie felt her face burned and heart bang against her chest the emotion she felt from the words "I am too…You..our relationship is my greatest source of pride." Her voice was a sweet whisper but it resounded in Steven's ear like a drum.

His face glowed pink as he started to grin and chuckle. The multiple emotions of love he felt for his Jambud, his best friend, battle partner and most recently partner in love bubbled to the surface. "Connie Maheswaran, I love you."

He had said it to her before. Passionately, jokingly, as a friend and more. Yet the way he said it just now, with a blushing face and strikingly strong eyes in a silent voice only loud for her ears. It made her quiver, shook her heart and dry her throat. It made her feel treasured. secured. It made her feel more than just loved. More than just his partner in love, but more like his partner in life.

"I love you too, Steven. " It was never hard to say it..but it was never this easy either nor did it warm her heart so much. She chortled as she saw him wipe his eyes..it made her wipe her own.

"Good, I'm not the only one crying in joy." He joked while he sniffled a laugh.

"Oh, be quiet, You lovable himbo." She retorted though her own.

The two rode through their fits of giggles, calming down after a few moments when Connie yawned.

"Sleepy berry." Steven teased

Connie nodded " It is a quarter to 4 here."

"Wait what..Where’d the time go?"

"Absorbed by the combined force of my awesomeness and your schmaltziness..Hehe, we time traveled."

Steven yawned "Apparently, Berry."

"My Bisky is sleepy as well."

"Yup, the eternal curse of the Z's"

"It plagues us to no end. Hhhaaa~wwnnn!" She smacked the roof of her mouth, her tongue coming from her yawn.

"Adorabloo~ohoo!"

"Yes..yes you are."Connie impishly smirked. "Can you meet in my dreams this soon? ."

"I could visit you tonight."

"I want you too..I really want you too" She sighed and shook her head ".. But no..You really seem tired. "

"Have been on the road for 16 hours prior to bed so.."

"My lovely liege." She shook her head again in faux disappointment. "You have to sleep uninterrupted, Biscuit."

"Looking out for me,huh?"

"You are my love and pride, after all."

"As are you..." Steven chuckled tiredly.

"We can stay on call...At least until our phone dies." Connie's eyes gain a competitive look, "See who sleeps first."

Steven arched an eyebrow. before nodding, "OK, Beauty berry, you're on." He laid on his left side as Connie laid on her right, their phone's back-light turn down to protect their eyes but still enough to see each other's smile.

"I fell for your smile first." The whisper came out quicker than she could stop.

"Really?"

"Yeah..It's so big and bright.."

"Hmm?" He smirked. " I fell for your voice first. Your voice is so calming and strong, and cute when you're laughing."

"Why am I not surprised you would fall for something sound related." She chortled.

"I love that sound...I love your eyes too. They're so deep and beautiful."

"Steven." She smiled tiredly. "How did I luck out with you."

"I ask myself the same thing." His voice held a lot more fatigue as did his grin. "Ni' your eyes getting very sleepy."

She shook her head in defiance "I think that's you Biscuit, I can hear the grogginess in your sweet baritone...Speaking of..Have ever told you I love your baritone voice."

"No...Tell me."

“I love your Baritone”

Steven sighed a laugh at the faux drunk tone of her voice. His eyes closing slowly“ I adore your contralto.”

“We make beautiful music together.”

“Jambuds right...If music was a relationship, it would be us.”

Connie hummed. “Suave. Where did you learn to be so charming?”

“I don’t know,” He rubbed his head as he yawned “ Just wanted to make you smile.”

“You always do.” She closed her eyes snuggling into her pillow. “ Steven?”

“Hmm.”

“Wanna get married after college?” her voice was completely swallowed by drowsiness induced drunkenness.

“Uh-hm, sure.. I’ll find a place for us and Lion, before then. “Steven was hardly any better.

She nodded. “That’s good...I love you by the way.”

“Love you too, Strawberry.”

“We’re gonna get married, yay..” Connie's voice drowned out to shallow breathing as she drifted to sleep. ”I’m Mrs. Maheswaran- Universe..”

Steven could only smile before he joined her in sleep. Her last statement resounded in his ear and heart...The sweetest lullaby he ever heard.

#connverse #connie maheswaran #steven universe #steven universe fanfiction #post SUF #post-series #30 day connverse challenge #30 days of domestic fluff connie maheswaran #30 days writing challenge #30 days of domestic fluff #nighttime routine #fluff #super fluffy #sleepy talks

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motleyfuckingcruee · 5 years

Text

Starry Eyes (Vince Neil x Reader One Shot)

Summary:

You and Vince have been best friends since you were kids. He doesn't realize how much he loves you until you guys are stargazing on the beach. And that's when you knew you were in love with him too.

Warnings:

Fluff and language

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!!

COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO BE ON THE TAGLIST FOR MÖTLEY FICS!

(Y/M/N) is your middle name.

(A/N: I actually do this with my hair when I talk 😂 👇)

"C'mon Vinny!" You exclaim, pulling on the sleeve of his leather jacket.

He had just gotten back from a ride on his motorcycle. Here lately, his feelings for you have changed. From being the love of a best friend, to the love of a girlfriend. Vince has been falling for you without even realizing it.

"Do we have to, (Y/N)?" Vince asks. He's been stuck in his head all day. He just wants a beer and a nap.

"This is the prime time to go put there, Vinny!" You say, getting more and more excited as you think about it. "We'll be out there when the sun's setting, the beach we go to will be deserted, and we'll get to stargaze! We haven't got to do that in forever! You've been to busy."

You've been missing Vince a lot more here lately. He's been so busy with the band. Sometimes you even feel jealous of them. And your feelings for Vinny have grown stronger. You've been trying to suppress them as best as you can, but it hasn't been working.

Vince didn't think spending more time with you is going to help his situation. But, as he looks at you pouting, he knows he's going to give in. He gives into you so easily. He can't ever say no to you. Especially when you're pouting.

"Alright," He sighs, pulling you into his body. He wraps an arm around you and you feel yourself flush. "As long as we can take my bike."

"I don't care how we get there, Vincent," You laugh. "I just wanna go!"

Vince chuckles, leading you out of your small apartment. "You're ridiculous sometimes, (Y/N) (Y/M/N) (Y/L/N)."

You roll your eyes, a smirk on your lips. You hop onto the back of the bike once Vince was settled on it. "You're just as bad as I am, Vincent Neil Wharton."

With that said, he revved up the bike and the both of you speed off towards your favorite beach.

It's actually very small and secluded. It's not as heavily used as many of the other beaches. You and Vince would usually go out there nearly every day before the band got big. Once they took off though, you stayed behind in LA while Vince went off and traveled the world to play his music. You are so proud and happy for him, but you can't help but feel a bit forgotten. He doesn't even call as often anymore.

And you couldn't exactly ignore all the tabloids about his scandals with strippers and random women. It hurt you, deeply. But, you can't tell Vince that. You don't want him feeling bad for you or thinking you're some selfish bitch.

You guys arrive in the parking lot of the beach. You are nearly jumping up and down with excitement and all the caffeine you had drank earlier today. You have too much energy than what you know what to do with.

Vince follows closely behind you. When you start to take off in a run, Vince grabs your hand. He laces your fingers together and pulls you back to where he is.

"What's got you full of energy?" He asks, a grin on his pink lips. "Did you drink too much coffe and cokes today?"

You frown, looking down at your feet. "How'd you know?"

He laughs, nudging you. "I know you."

You look up at him. Your breath nearly hitches at how amazing he looks in the setting sunlight. His blonde hair seems almost silver. His beautiful blue eyes match the waves rolling onto the sand. "Maybe too well," You quip back, trying to hide the blush that's crept onto your cheeks.

Vince peeks down at you, and his breath does hitch at how beautiful you look. Your (H/C) hair looks amazing. Your (E/C) eyes reflect off of the ocean. If it's possible, he falls for you even more.

You guys just walk in silence for a while. Your joined hands swing a bit as you observe your surroundings. He pulls you off into the sand, finally. He goes close to the ocean and lays down. He tugs you down with him, causing you to laugh as you fall onto his chest. You both laugh, trying ignore how close you are to each other.

You roll off of him, and look up at the sky. The sun finally set. The stars come out, shining like a thousand suns. Your eyes brighten at their beauty. You love the stars so much. There's no real reason why, you just do. You always have.

Vince looks over at you, his smile growing as he looks at your admiring the stars. He knows how much you love them. You look so perfect to him in this moment. You look perfect to him all of the time, but even more so now. You look like a goddess. Vince bites down at his lip, thinking over his next words.

"(Y/N)?" He says, sounding nervous.

You hum in response, ripping your eyes from the stars above. Your (E/C) eyes meet his blue ones.

"I-I have something to tell you. It's about why I was out so long on my bike today," He begins. You're instantly hooked. What could he be so nervous about? "I was. . .thinking. A-About you. We've known each other for a while now. We've been through a lot with each other. You've been there for me through everything. Even helped me with my dumb ass plans. When I'm one tour, you're all I think about. Your eyes, your smile, your sarcasm, everything. You're my first thought when.I wake up, and the last thought when I go to sleep. Here lately, my feelings for you have changed. I-In a good way!" He exclaims when he notices the scared look in your eyes. "They've evolved in a way I never thought they would. What I'm trying to say is, I'm in love with you." Your eyes widen in surprise. He loves you back? Vince continues to babble on, taking your widened eyes as a bad sign. "You don't have to say anything. I'm sure you don't even see me in that way. I mean why would you? I've been neglecting you since the band took off! What kind of selfish son of a-."

You cut him off by pressing your lips to his. He gasps in surprise, but ultimately kisses back. His lips move against yours perfectly. You feel like you're on Cloud Nine.

You pull back with a grin on your face. You bite down on your lip as you say, "God I wanted to do that for so long."

"Y-You have?" Vince stutters, causing you to laugh.

"'Course I have! What makes you think I wouldn't have?" You ask. You could've sworn you made your feelings perfectly clear.

He shrugs. "I've been getting real distant lately. I thought you would've hated me by now."

You let out a laugh. "Me? Hate you? No, no Vincent! I'm in love with you!" You say dramatically.

He laughs at you, but stops as soon as he fully processes your words.

"Y-You what?" He asks in disbelief.

"I love you, Vince Neil."

You press your lips against his again. He pushes you onto your back and crawls on top of you. He kisses you with as much passion and love as he can.

"I love you too," He mumbles against your lips.

This is how it's supposed to be. You and Vince against the world. You know you'll always be together. Nothing can separate you. Not even if you guys break up. You need each other. You'll be lost without one another.

He may be a rockstar, but for you, he's the sweetest man alive. And he'll never hurt you.

#motley crue #classic rock #rock #rocknroll #rock music #rockband #vince neil #fanfic #fanfiction #reader #reader insert #vince x reader #vince neil x reader

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ready8210 · 5 years

Text

“Let me in your heart again”

1. He hates me

Vivian

Munich / Germany - Musicland Studios

I nervously pluck my blouse, sitting in the sparing lobby of Munich's „Musicland Studios", as I wait for the first "meeting" with my future „boss", no less than QUEEN.

You've read correctly. QUEEN! I can't get my head around it yet.

The band was searching for a photographer, to document the tour life and studio work of their upcoming "works" album and their following world - tour, which would later lead them - or should I say US - from Europe, over Asia, Australia to America and Africa.

I was one of the lucky ones, the band and management put on the shortlist in late October, last year. A view weeks later, I was informed that it was me, who would attend the band for the next two years.

Two years, I think to myself, wrinkling my brows in disbelief.

At this moment I don't know if I am incredible lucky or should be scared.

I still desperately try to smooth out the wrinkles on my pastel - yellow blouse, as I nervously scan the room. Leaning back in an uncomfortable armchair, I inhale deep as I gaze over my chosen outfit.

Earlier today I was frustrated standing in front of my closet, throwing around varying outfits, unable to decide what to wear for my meeting with the band.

What would one wear when meeting Queen?

I racked my brain this morning, that would change my whole life.

Needles to say I didn't come to an answer.

After one hour of putting on nearly all content of my wardrobe, I decided to go for casual and simple. I really didn't want to look like an applicant for a secretary job.

I wear that pastel yellow sleeveless blouse I already mentioned 2 times (you have to excuse, I'm extremely nervous), paired with light blue skinny jeans and simple pumps. My wavy hazelnut brown hair is put into a ponytail on this hot July summer day.

Fiddling with the strap of my bag, I hear a door open and dull music echoing in the hallways of the oppressive building.

It is QUEEN, I recognize immediately, forming a smile on my lips.

The music reaches my ears as I am leaning myself forward, trying to get closer to the source of sound.

There it is, the mesmerizing voice of the one and only Freddie Mercury, bringing on goosebumps all over my body. I cling to the armrest, on the chair I am sitting in, as the door closes and the sound fades all to fast.

As you can imagine, this last event didn't lessen my massive nervousness.

You now may've recognized for whom of the four bandmates my heart beats.

In certain circumstances this may change within the next hour. But it don't want to anticipate things.

„Miss Kurzmann" a monotone voice behind a to high counter tears me from my thoughts. „Mr Beach will arrive in about 15 minutes. Can I offer you some tee, coffee or water in the meantime?"

„Just water, thank you" I respond barely audible, biting on my lip. I couldn't handle more at the current stage of my tense mood.

15 minutes. Great. 15 minutes unsuccessfully trying to cool down my nerves, to later make a "smooth" impression.

"Here you go, Ms", I hear the monotone voice again, coming closer, handing me my water.

She's a quiet conservative dressed, middle aged woman, wearing her grey curly hair in a shoulder-length bob. The kind of person, you wouldn't expect to work in a studio, with an endless coming and going of superstars.

Otherwise today its me, sitting in that exact same front hall.

I am by all means far from being conservative, but at the same time, even more far from being some "rockstar material".

The reserved type, always taking a backseat and avoiding the spotlight like wolves the fire.

Ok, I have to confess "reserved" is an understatement. I'm hopelessly shy, especially when it comes to situations like today. Not that I would experience something like this every day.

The only possible outcome for today is disaster.

"Ok, time to relax Viv, you already have the bloody job. Get a grip!!" I quietly whisper, trying to convince myself for the remaining time sitting there.

"Still 11 minutes to go" I mumble, as I look at my watch with trembling hands.

"Your first time?" A voice from the other end of the room brings me back to reality.

"Please excuse me, is it your first time working for a band like Queen?" She quickly continuous.

All I can manage as response, is putting on a tortured smile while nodding almost invisible.

"Don't worry Ms, the band is absolutely thrilled by your photographs and barely can await to finally meet you. And by the way, they won't give you a hard time. They're all relaxed, down to earth guys.

Relaxed,.... so the complete opposite of me, it crosses my mind, as I stare at my watch again.

"9 minutes" I whisper, while watching visitors entering the building.

I hesitantly sip on my water, to not look to helpless and lost and to somehow BRIDGE the DAMN REMAINING 9 MINUTES. Please excuse my little emotional outburst.

Ok Viv....

Oh, crap! Now I realize, I haven't introduced myself to you.

I'll cut it short.

I'm Vivian Kurzmann, 33 years old/young (it's up to you to decide), born and raised in Germany, living in London, in the middle of a divorce, freelance photographer with passion and right now on a kamikaze mission.

"Ok Viv. Think about ways to relax!" I tell myself a tad to loud.

"Excuse me? You need something Ms?" It echoes in the room.

"Oh, I'm ...I was just reading something". To cover up my little white lie, I grab the first magazine I can find, from a massive steel table, right in front of me.

Under extreme tension, I flip through the magazine, without even realizing what I'm looking at.

Maybe I find an article about reducing stress in here?

Come on Viv, figure something out. I try to remember while laying back the unhelpful piece of paper.

"Autogenic training!" I mumble. Wrong time wrong place. Don't be ridiculous.

"Smoking?" Yes, I smoke now and than, an awful habit, I know. I decide to quit smoking for today, not wanting to risk to smell like a bilgy ashtray.

"Meditation, Yoga, ...." Google shows me some options on my phone, which I grabbed earlier to soothe my trembling hands.

"Very helpful fuc*** World Wide Web. I cannot possibly roll out my yoga mat in here and do the downward dog." I mutter and shut google down.

Taking a quick look on my phone, I realize: 4 more minutes to go.

Breath Viv, you can do this!!!!! I remind myself over and over again in my mind, that goes absolutely crazy at the very moment.

"Ms Kurzmann, Mr Beach has arrived and will be here in a minute." the nice woman informs me.

Nodding confirmative I gasp a simple "thank you."

Time stretches like chewing gum, as I finally hear a male voice approaching me. "Ms Kurzmann, I welcome you to the "Musicland Studios". I'm delighted to finally meet you in person. I'm already a big fan and admirer of your work." a brightly smiling, effusive gesticulating man surprises me, holding out his hand to me.

"Oh excuse me Ms. My name is Jim Beach."

"Kurzmann, the pleasure's all mine." I babble, while standing up way to fast, almost bumping into him.

Where's the exit? Last chance to do a runner. I helplessly look around. I must look like turkeys voting for christmas, at least I feel this way.

Mr. Beach wastes no time, taking me along the gloomy corridors towards the studio where the band is recording. "I will introduce you to the band to get to know each other and have a quick talk. Let me tell you, you really made an impression." He winks at me walking besides me. "May I ask you to take you to my office afterwards. I would like to discuss the business side and do the paperwork?"

As I stammer a convincing "sure", we reach the door of our destination, noticing, considering the amount of noise and swearing, a heated discussion reaches its peak.

Mr beach opens the door, rolling his eyes while he whispers at me "please excuse this....rockstars at work."

I can't bite back a chuckle, as the door swings open.

"Guys I want to introduce you to Ms Kurzmann." He shouts.

For a split of a second I want to curl up and die.

Much to my reassurance, the band don't even recognize the two intruders and continue their argument.

The man at my side now starts to get uneasy and tenses up, as he screams again. "DAMN GUYS!!!!"

I quickly notice the heat growing in my cheeks, as all eyes lay on us. No, on ME.

Viv, damn, now of all times. Think about ....ice....no, Antarctica, .....uh. FU**

I can only let my gaze wander for a view seconds and take in the room, as a sympathetically grinning young man, with blonde tousled hair and sunglasses - I guess the sun always shines for him, even in a pitch black cellar - room. - sprints towards me, with joyfulness and flings his arms around my neck. "Hi sweetie. Vivian, right? I'm Roger. Roger Taylor, the drummer of the pack." He sputters, as he steps back again, while turning to face the band and rolling his eyes in annoyance.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Taylor." I smile at him bashfully.

"I'll call you Viv...can I call you Viv?" I'm just Roger." He grins, with the brightest smile he can pull of.

"Alright, just Roger ." I joke, unable to suppress a giggle.

"Brian, come over!" He shouts to a large, lean man with a giant mane of brown curly hair.

The shaggy man puts down his guitar, leaning it against the wall and strolls towards me, kindly smiling, reaching out his hand for me. "Ms Kurzmann, it's a pleasure. I'm Brian May."

I like him already. He has this strongly soothing impact. At this moment....priceless.

"Vivian Kurzmann, my pleasure." I reply affectionately.

Viv, you're almost done, inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale...it wheels in my head.

Suddenly a shyly smiling man with guitar, is standing in front of me and introduces himself as John Deacon, the bassist of the group. "Miss Kurzmann, welcome to chaos." He jokes.

"I'm very pleased to meet you Mr Deacon." I give him a handshake, a bit to long as I try to interpret his restrained smile.

I think I like John Deacon, he's just like me. Exaggerated shy and reserved. My clone.

I neglect the fact that this man is a music genius!

"FREDDIE, what the hell takes you this long? Take your ass over here!!! I hear the blonde yell behind the mixing console, interrupting my thoughts.

Ok. The time has come. Breeeeath! Don't get hysterical. I internally scream. There's still some hope, this will work out right.

After a while, what seemed like eternity, no less than Freddie Mercury in flash and bone, appears in the room.

Like a tiger on prowl, he paces at me with slow, cautious moves, his lips formed into a devilish grin.

I can swear everything happens in slow motion.

I can feel his eyes - oh yes, his eyes, his beautiful big brown oceans, framed by those incredible long lashes, I could sink into right now - examine every inch of my trembling body as he spits out words, that break down my idyllic world.

"So you're the one to trample on my privacy from now on, like any greedy paparazzi, reporter and journalist out there?" He hisses while hesitating to reach his hand out to me.

I suppose that means FREDDIE MERCURY HATES ME??!!

As he construes my slack jawed and shocked expression, he continues in a dismissive tone.

"I think you know who I am, but what's your name again?

Pulling my hand away that won't receive a handshake from Freddie Mercury today, I stutter "Kurz.....Vi Vivian Kurzmann."

"Kurz Vivian Kurzmann?" he apes me, grinning cheekily, waiting for me to break down.

"This will be fun." He laughs, while shaking his head and stepping back.

STOP! Can we go back please? That's not how I fantasized this!

The thoughts in my head ride a rollercoaster when my stomach cramps at the last spoken words, still echoing in my head.

Everything feels unreal, as I stand there, watching everything in a haze.

Before I can realize what happens, he continues with a disdainfully look on his face.

"To get it straight. I'm not thrilled by the fact someone is chasing me day after day, to document every fucking move I make. I really appreciate my privacy and want you to respect this. No photos beyond the studio and the venues. Got it?"

This will be the most horrible two years of world history. Freddie Mercury hates me.

As he turns round and starts to stroll away and I almost pass out, I begin to stammer

"Mr Mercury I assure that your privacy and the privacy of everybody involved is crucial to me and I..."

„I find this a little hard to believe, considering you do the same like any fucking journalist. Dig around in others life's and take what you can get." he spits at me and turns his back on me.

Bracing up one last time, I start to answer him, as I hear John entering the conversation

"Freddie, calm down. Don't give that pure girl such a hard time."

Freddie disdainfully gazes at me one last time, before he enters the side room.

I can feel a hand on my shoulder, as I come back to reality. „He has his moods. Don't worry, in a view days he will be fine with it and won't cause any trouble." John is trying to calm me.

All I can manage is to nod like an idiot, still standing there, paralyzed from shock.

As I let my eyes wander around the room, Mr Beach stands behind me. He must have left the studio for our short encounter and came back at this disastrous moment.

„Ms Kurzmann, may I walk you out" he asks me politely. „I love to." I answer quickly, in a relieved voice. I just want get out of here. Somewhere far away from the predator, that just rent me.

John, Brian and Roger farewell me, cheering me up by telling me how they're looking forward, working with me.

„Don't worry about our little diva, Viv. He will calm down." Roger nudges me from the side.

„You'll see, he's not that bad." Brian encourages me calmly.

„Unless his shadow follows him." a joking Roger lets out.

„Shadow?" I can manage to ask, confusion washing over my now chalk white face.

„PAUL" they all shout, rolling their eyes in unison, before bursting out laughing.

As I want to dig deeper, Mr Beach interrupts us. „Ms Kurzmann..?" Turning towards him I notice,, he already stands besides the open door, waiting for me to follow him.

I turn to face the boys again. "See you in a view." I wink towards them, as I leave the room.

Disappointed, I couldn't take a closer look to the studio and the band working, I make my way out, following Mr. Beach.

A nice bunch of men, I think to myself, as we walk down the barren corridor, were it not for my new nemesis.

As I told you. Disaster.

Part 2 will follow soon.

Also published on wattpad:

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the-mythical-norm · 6 years

Text

I don't believe the mathmatician...

Give a man a mask and he will tell you the truth. I’ve seen that. I’ve lived that. So has Oscar Wilde. Even this tumblr is a mask. We all bleed our hearts out through this feed but when it comes to in-person conversations, the barbaric YAWP fades. It’s mostly reduced to tenuous babble about grades, girls, and what happened Saturday night. I say mostly because I have indeed had many deep, enlightening conversations. Sometimes we like to say we don’t serve that which we don’t believe, and we talk about how awful I️t is to be a sheep in the heard. So we are able to see it from the outside... yet some of us are still living the lie. An accounting major writes about rebellion and passion..about how life should be filled with the constant struggle to absorb energy, live freely and spontaneously. A kid studying to be a doctor, lawyer, or something like that will make it obvious that it’s not what he truly wants, using the mask. It’s contradicting. But cool says we are supposed to contradict ourselves right?…. maybe trump is secretly a sweetheart (totally kidding) and writes beautiful poems, but then he completely flips that through the presidential mask, because he’s appealing to the masses. This tumblr is a mask. It’s easy to blame everything else if you don’t dig what you do, but I️t gets you no where. The truth is, all that is gold is rusted. It’s our fault if we cannot see the magic in the mundane. Cliché but true. School can be cool. So stop taking classes you think will get you somewhere safe and rich, because they won’t. Take classes you like.. no, take classes you love and don’t even pick a major. Fuck I️t. Don’t even graduate, actually learn what you want, and I️f I️t lines up, sure get a degree. Those are just my thoughts. I wonder If anyone who has taken this course has actually done something, like drop out, or something so radical. I wonder if someone has taken these magnificent ideas, strung them together into something concrete, something strong, and busted through the gates without looking back. Some kids just see this class as eh, an easy A. I just can’t believe that. I’m not trying to offend anyone, I know that I too am a creature that craves more than is healthy. I’m not doing anything right either. As James Baldwin would say, “Artists are here to disturb the peace.” So I’m just thinkin’ out loud.

It’s contradicting. To leave a secure, lucrative major. Because then the very people I️ just told not to be sheep can then be sheep in efforts to try and find the coolness, the magic in being a mundane sheep. But then again I️ could contradict that contradiction and say that school can be cool if you look hard enough but no matter how hard you try a major will never be cool if its purpose is to make you rich and comfortable, in the absence of passion. So it’s our fault if we can’t see the magic in the mundane, does that mean there is no such thing as mundane? Or maybe it does exist, but only because we manufactured it. I️m pretty sure if I️ forced myself to be a doctor, I’d never find magic, other people might, but not me. So is there a line? A line to where you should leave this job, this school, this town?

Hang on a sec. What is passion?

In its truest form, I think passion is something that pulls you from within. You do it because its energy reels you in with no mercy, a gravitational pull. An unwavering intensity of desire.

I want to understand the inner workings of a mathematicians brain. Why is he passionate about math? I hate math, If I can understand why he loves it, I’ll be able to see another part of the world that I couldn’t see before.

Does he really love it? Or is it just because math is definite, it has answers and can be conquered. It’s comforting to have answers, it makes everything so much easier. We all love answers. Part of me screams out that the mathematician can’t possibly be passionate about math. I know it’s ignorant. But I don’t see how numbers and grids can reach out and pierce the inner core of your soul, where the fiery passion hides. The other part of me knows it’s a dirty job, but somebody’s got to do it. It’s not that scary to be a mathematician either, or an accountant, or a lawyer. You know the outcome as long as you do your homework. One of the things I’d like to do is make documentary films, but people always ask me. “Aren’t you afraid you won’t make anything good? What’s your fall back?” How come no one ever asks the mathematician that? Because it’s not. It’s a sure shot to safety. Its scary to do something that isn’t concrete. But our society shields us from uncomfortable things. Maybe thats why our passions are so limited. If you help a butterfly out of its cocoon, it will not be strong enough to sustain whats next, it has to struggle and rage to live. Maybe we’ve been coddled too much, so we are afraid to do something bold, and scary.

“Precisely at the point when you begin to develop a conscience you must find yourself at war with your society.” -James Baldwin.

So we are out of tune. Thats why I don’t believe the mathematician. Because maybe…these jobs should not exist. They were symptoms of a disease called greed. We need doctors, lawyers, accountants, mathematicians, etc, because of our greed and desire to evolve and take over the world. There’s so many of us now. I mean, we definitely need doctors, I love doctors. Maybe I’m wrong, I probably am. Ask yourself this, if you grew up in a world with no color, would you be happy with the way the world looks? Of course! You don’t know any better. Thats my point, how can you know what you love if you’ve only seen barely a glimpse of the earth. It’s absurd to know what you want to do this young. It’s absurd to only want to do one thing, to me at least. We are constantly growing, changing our minds, our thoughts, our outfits. We need to go out of our comfort zones, out into the places we are most scared. Thats where we will see more. We just need to get out there, live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink the wild air - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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