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leilani-lily · 3 months

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~Oh Deer~ (Chapter 1)

... So this idea for an Alastor x reader (kinda?) story popped in my brain, and has refused to leave me no matter how hard I try.

Have I written fanfiction recently? Hell no.

Do I even know how to write for an AroAce character? No but I'm gonna do my damndest to represent him properly (and also relying on outer sources so I'm not offending anyone).

Do I feel like a complete fool for being sucked back into the fanfiction world and re-entering with a freakin Hazbin Hotel fic? ABSOOOO-FREAKIN-LUTELY.

But here we are. The writing gods have spoken. And they have declared that I write this story out so my poor brain can focus on other things like work.

Figured I'd share so it's just not on my computer all lonely. Will be a slow burn so fair warning. Let's be real, the deer boi needs love. But not overly romantic love. Just, someone he ends up really caring about and becoming his favourite.

SYNOPSIS: AroAce! Alastor x Chef!Singer! Reader. The hotel is looking to hire a chef to prepare meals for the staff/guests. Somehow you're hired and you begin your new life. And somehow end up becoming close to a certain Radio Demon. Word Count: 1.8 K

Chapter 1 under the cut. Enjoy I guess? ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡

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Ok, deep breaths y/n. Remember to smile.

You felt your lips curl up into a strained grin as if to fight off the nerves in your chest, your grip tightening on the flyer in your fist. This could go either two ways. One, you get the job and are able to live a life of somewhat normality. Or two, you get hung from the tippy top of the building by your own intestines. With your legs chopped off. And one of your arms sticking out of your ass.

Gotta love Hell and it’s creative subjects.

You shake your head out of those terrible thoughts, surely it wouldn’t be that bad?? When you saw the original broadcast on the 666 News, you couldn’t stop thinking how nice the Princess of Hell actually was. And building an entire hotel to help her subjects reform into something better was, perhaps a little optimistic in your opinion, but it made you admire her gumption and her love for her subjects.

So later when you found the flyer in search of a chef at the very same establishment the princess was hoping to fill… well, it somehow managed to get you all the way here. Standing at the doorsteps of the very lonely looking hotel on the hill.

You had to admit it wasn’t the look you had imagined, but hey, this was Hell. You had seen worse. And everyone has to start somewhere. Including yourself, arm still poised ready to knock yet not yet making the motion.

You felt so stupid, you had been standing here for almost 10 minutes now just trying to get the courage to enter the damn building. You sigh to yourself and shake out the jitters. Alright, let’s just do this. Once again, you smile, puff out your chest and raise your arm high in the air, ready to strike with a newfound courage.

“Well folks, looks like the little lady is finally ready to take the leap! Will she follow through with her actions? Or will she choke and back out of the fight? Let’s tune in and find out~”

You felt your heart nearly leap out of your chest as you whip your head around to look behind you. A tall demon clad in red and ruby eyes stood behind you, a wickedly wide grin filling his face as he points what appears to be a microphone in your direction. You stare at it dumbly, then make eye contact with him again. He remains poised, half lidded eyes seeming to hold a sparkle of impish joy. His eyes flicker from you, to your raised arm, and back to you. After a embarrassingly long time of connecting the dots, you finally extend your arm closer to the door, never breaking focus on the demon behind you (you can't help but notice he raises his microphone even closer to you), and give the door a good solid knock.

“AND SHE’S DONE IT FOLKS, what a display!!” He pulls the microphone back to himself, as you continue to stare dumbfounded “The form, the elegance, it could almost make a grown Imp cry. Let's give her a hand people.” He begins to clap as a roar of applause plays from… somewhere.

You couldn’t tell if this guy was being sarcastic or genuine, but the whole absurdity of it all, plus the bundle of nerves you were feeling earlier, seemed to bubble up inside of you and you couldn't help a little snort escape. The red demon’s grin widened as he ceases his clapping, stepping closer to you as you continue to giggle.

“Ahhh now isn’t that better. A much nicer smile than the one you were faking earlier. Besides, there’s no need to be so shy my dear. This hotel is always happy to accept wayward demons looking for reformation!”

Upon hearing his words, you turn to face him and put your hands up “Oh nono, I’m not here to-”

“Ohoho~! and what’s this you have here?” Before you can finish your sentence, the tall demon ripped the flyer out of your hand and inspected it quickly, before turning back to you. His half-lidded gaze was now round with surprise, his grin becoming even wider (which you didn’t even think was possible).

“So THAT explains the nerves from before! And here I was just thinking you were a timid little thing. But a business woman! Now that I can admire.” He smiles at you almost impressed and leans in closer, your noses almost touching.

“Tell me my dear, can you make a good jambalaya? Or perhaps a hearty gumbo with cornbread on the side~?”

You were so flustered with the speed of everything happening (plus the close proximity of this demon you had just met certainly didn’t help). All you could manage was a jumbled “Uhh, well yes I-!”

“WONDERFULLLL~!" He straightens up again and you sigh with relief. “I’ll be sure to test you on such skills. But for now we should-”

The front doors of the hotel suddenly burst open and a short gray female stands before you, with long silvery hair and an eyepatch. She looks at you for a moment, before turning her gaze at the red demon and giving him a scowl.

“Alastor, what the HELL took you so long, you should’ve been back ages ago. And quit creeping out new potential clients.” Her gaze adverts back to you, expression softening ever so slightly, “Seriously, if he’s bothering you-” “Oh Vaggie my dear, no need to be so hostile. I was simply going over business with our newest chef!” he brings his long fingers up behind your shoulder and pulls you in close against his chest, making you yelp a moment before regaining composure. You could sense this so-called 'Vaggie' demon tense, eyes flickering between the two of you. You felt as if your brain was sputtering to catch up with the current conversation (he WORKS here??!) before finally realizing what he had just called you. You sneak a look at him, and he gives you a quick wink before focusing back on the female before him.

“Now be a doll and have Nifty tidy up one of the rooms, preferably one of a reasonable size and close to the kitchen. And call upon Charlie as well, she’ll DEFINITELY want to meet our newest addition!”

The female in front of you shot a glare at Alastor (you quickly noted these two did not seem to get along), but then flicked her gaze back at you. After a moment, she sighed and turned back into the building as she followed the male demon’s orders. You couldn’t help but notice how Alastor’s grip on you tightened ever so slightly as a chuckle escaped his lips, static humming ever so louder in amusement. He himself began to walk into the hotel, guiding you along with him.

"Now then. We’ll have to introduce you to everyone, as well as get you to fill in the proper paperwork, give you a proper tour of the place and-!”

“Wait wait,” you stop walking, causing him to halt. You notice a slight twitch in his eye and his hand squeezes you for a moment. He doesn’t like to be interrupted, duly noted. You take a breath.

“Sorry, uh for interrupting” That seemed to please him. “But does this mean… I got the job?? You don’t need a resume or a test or…?”

Alastor let out a guffaw of amusement “Why of course my dear! As long as you remain true to your word of being able to cook a good New Orleans dish, that’s all the proof I’ll need! There hasn’t been many a demon coming here interested in the job, so I say your timing couldn’t be more perfect!”

Well that was the easiest damn interview you’ve ever done. You felt yourself exhale a sigh of relief as you smile up to the tall demon.

“Wow, that’s… that’s amazing, thank you so much.” He gave you a half lidded smirk, clearly enjoying being praised “So… does this make you my boss, Mr…?”

You heard the sound of a record screech as his eyes widened in surprise. Hand finally leaving your shoulder and placing it on his own chest he began to laugh heartilly, a laugh track playing in the background. You stood there confused for a moment before he finally responded.

“Ohhh my goodness me, my mother would be rolling in her grave if she ever heard about this. How rude of me to be so forward without properly introducing myself!” One minute he was standing right beside you, and then the next he had sunken like a shadow into the floor, only to appear in front of you a few steps ahead. With grace and suave you didn’t realize he possessed, he gave a small hand flourish before bowing in front of you.

“I am Alastor, also known as the Radio Demon. I happen to be the Hotel’s Facility Manager, but you’ll find Miss Morningstar is the real ringleader around here,” You notice the corner of his lip twitch at that last remark, but you pay no mind to it. “If you ever have any questions or concerns, do not hesitate to reach out to me.” You smile and dip yourself in your own little curtsy as he straightens up.

“My name is y/n, and I’ll be sure to do my best to serve you and this hotel, sir.” Alastor seemed to hum with approval as he looks down at you. “I guess I just have one more question for you, if that’s alright.”

“Why of course dear y/n, whatever would it be?”

“Well, I uh…” You feel yourself becoming flustered at the question, and the radio demon seemed to notice. Cocking a head to the side, he takes a step forward, opening his arms into a friendly gesture.

“Come now dearest, you can ask me anything! If we’re going to be working together, we have to be honest with each other~” You look up at him and sigh, knowing he was right. With a gulp you straighten your back and wear a serious expression.

“How long did you see me standing by the door?”

Alastors face didn’t waver, it was hard to tell what was going on in his mind. Then his smile grew into what looked like an amused, smug expression before answering.

“The whole time.”

You groaned and felt your head slap against your hand, making Alastor burst into laughter yet again at your expense. He was there watching the entire time?? Satan’s Ass you felt like such an idiot. Was he waiting for you to move so he could get in the building?? The more you thought about it the more you wanted to sink into the floor and die, for a 2nd time. The radio demon wiped a stray tear from his eye.

“Ohhhh y/n, what a riot you are. I can already tell that this is going to be fun~”

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First chapter hoorayyy ♡〜٩( ˃▿˂ )۶〜♡ Not sure how often I'll be updating, hopefully soon as I'm currently inspired. Thanks for reading thus far!FIRST (You're here!) PREVIOUS (Doesn't exist ( • ᴗ - ) ✧) NEXT

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel fanfiction #oh deer #leilani-lily

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wyrdle · 2 months

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Ikutsuki Backstory ideas and other character thoughts

Jotting this down for my own reference for a hopeful future comic about this pun man as well as for anyone interested in the babygirl lmao. Also I can't believe so little exists to help flesh him out more

Persona 3 spoilers under the cut

Ok so I haven't finished the game, but I've sped run reading wikis and watching movies and clips, pardon me if I get any details wrong. I also don't know the other games, but am semi-aware of some of the links between Ikutsuki and them.

Anyway:

Ikutsuki rambling about The Fall and a Prince out of the blue is painfully one of the worst twists I've ever seen 😂 You don't lore drop your way into justifying your motives lmao. I'd have liked some hints about his past, and then a final explanation for it. Whilst I understand it's meant to be a sudden twist, it just turns out anti-climatic and even annoying narratively haha.

So, to fill out how Ikutsuki's backstory, I was thinking it'd be rad if we saw his actual research days with Kirijo's CEO / Mitsuru's gramps. I'd likely scrap that they were actively looking to invoke The Fall, and have them primarily focused on the time-bending abilities of Shadows, all being scientists dedicated to helping humanity genuinely.

I dislike the idea of such a large group of scientists being omnicidal maniacs/Nyx worshippers, so I think simplifying the Kirijo family's guilt to simply accidentally fucking up their experiments and causing such catastrophic change to the world to be a better go at it.

Enter Ikutsuki, who is a part of this research team like every other hopeful/morally decent scientist. The experiment goes awry, Shadows are released en masse, Professoer Shuji Ikutsuki is swathed, bathed, consumed by this writhing dark mass that tells him about The Fall and whispers about the Prince who will be grandly rewarded for it.

In his canon pre-suicide speech, Ikutsuki talks as if he believes the current world has lots of wrong in it, going to the extremes of wanting to cleanse and rebuild it. I think it'd be fitting for him to start off as this hopeful scientist, cheery and dorky, only for him to go through the trauma of direct exposure to Shadows + being the lone survivor amidst the wreckage and dead bodies of his colleagues.

It's a combo of real-life horror and supernatural Persona weirdness that motivates him into being the manipulator/cold scientist he is. Idk if my timeline of events is right, but post-Tartarus formation, ikutsuki kicks off figuring out plans for The Fall in earnest. Prompting his secret research on children for inducing Personas etc. (I think Strega and Ikutsuki weren't involved with each other, so for this I'd say yeah, he'd be the one responsible for that instead of Kirijo group in general.)

Other fun things for him is that surviving the sort of possession by Nyx's fragments during the formation of Tartarus gives him 'the Potential'. AKA he discovers he can exist in the darkest hour, and is eventually the one who researches himself to enable others to do so as well. It's just more reason for Kirijo group to not suspect him, and even owe him for his work.

I'm likely getting plenty of canon timeline of events off, but I think it'd be really cool for the Chairman himself to be similarly affected by the Kirijo group's experiment alongside the SEES members. Albeit, in a way that fucks him up into becoming the antagonist. Not to say he has no free will/is being actively coerced by Nyx, but that singular moment of interacting with the Shadows changed him and his outlook on life quite drastically.

Lastly, I'm pained that he doesn't really fit into the group. I think there's so much potential there for him to actually be a part of the SEES gang, holding some genuine affection that's a remnant of his pre-Shadow affected self, even going as far as having hesitation/second thoughts. Idk lol, canon Ikutsuki's death is waved off with little impact beyond how he killed Mitsuru's dad, when this guy the SEES team trusts/looks for direction kills himself in front of them. There's no emotional pay-off or pain, his death/twist reveal is just an event that happens lmao. I'd have liked to see Ikutsuki genuinely be an adult figure all the kids needed, and for them to feel the sting of his betrayal on a more personal level than what we got.

Anyway, TLDR, I feel like this helps make Ikutsuki a better villain lol. His fingers are in all the pies already!!! Use him!

So normal about this long haired, bespectacled, goofy middle aged man. He has such dad energy, and I love the angsty narrative of being corrupted lol

pls yell about him to me tq very much

#shuji ikutsuki #persona 3 #the whole child experimentation thing could also be an interesting aspect #like instead of senseless cruelty #having ikutsuki be a bit more grey and actually hold fatherly affection for them yet still abuse them #is so painfully sad #bro's braincells fried when the lab went kablooey #i am haunted by the imagery of a man struggling with his devotion to this all powerful incomprehensible world ending thing #that's so much more fun lol #IMAGINE #persona 3 spoilers

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donotaskwhyiamhere · 15 days

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Hey I love your writings of Shanks

I saw your post about writing others characters and I was wondering if you could do that for me (if you want)

He's pretty muscular, he has short curls and he wears a mask. Before he joined Shank's crew he was a very skilled detective. it doesn't take long for him to piece things together.

He has a quiet voice but he isn't shy by any means. He's very mellow but can be assertive when he feels it's necessary. He likes shanks because of his strong loyalty, and his goofy personality at times.

Please pleasee can you write some ideas for the twos relationship 🙏🙏 it can be fluffy or lemony I'd appreciate either

Shanks x detective m!reader

...............................................

Hello my coner peeps. I am at the moment in the start of my exams. So forgive me for being late.

I love writeimg for poeple so I'm happy to write for you, and as much as I would love to write something a little more spicy, I can't do that till June 13 when I turn 18. So if you want something spicy, please wait till then. I don't want to write something like that till I'm of age for some mute be uncomfortable. Thank you.

Now I hope I got this right. But if your not fully happy please tell me what else you would like to see, I love writing these for you. If you want a certain character (you) please just ask, no fear. I wrote this one differently, it's more Iike half story half imagines. I hope that's ok with you, if you want your character in a certain situation please do ask.

Enjoy, tell me if you would like a rewrite if unhappy.

...............................................

(Y/N) (L/N) was known for their amazing skills as a detective and mysterious nature, often asked to solve cases that was forgotten or deemed unsolvable. He was often hired by the marins and familys looking for lots loved ones.(L/N) had all they needed, money, fame, adventure and praise from those he saved but even with all of that it was lonely going on adventures alone. He wished for a family of his own, it didn't matter who it was and his wish was granted in a strange but simple way. Shanks

.......

One day you were hired by a marine to find out who had stolen their supplies of Sake and meat. Since they were both too lazy and just happened to recognize you. You confirmed the marine was just lazy because you easily found the thieving pirate known as Shanks, simply having a party on the beach with his crew. You watched quietly from the bushes, you looked away for a moment to grab you note little note book but the moment you turn back your surprised by Shanks right in front of you "Well, hello there peeping tom" You yelped falling back. Naturally you were scared, sure you had some muscle with a good build but you were not the biggest fighter, more brain the muscles.

To your surprise, again, he invited you to join him, for what reasons, you did not know. You sat quietly most of the time drinking along and listening closely to conversations.

SHANKS P0V

Shanks watched you from the corner of his eyes, he knew who you were, he heard story's of you but not many of your beautiful looks, your quiet nature, eyes darting around analyzing every small detail and word.

Shanks goofed around with you, teasing and making jokes, often ruffled your curly hair whice he loved feeling between his fingers. After a while he finds out your easily flustered, but not afried to bite back, whice leads into a flirting battle between the two of you. He gladly did most of the talking for you but would love how confident and sure you sounded when yu did speak.

But in all honesty he thought you were cute even if he thought it was a simple one night stand desire but as the night sky came he realized you had this type of innocents to you that made him feel... calm and exsited to see what more your hiding

....

YOUR POV

After a few hang outs with them you were asked to join whice you gladly accepted, welcoming the new life and family you wanted.

...............................................

IMAGINES:

• With your chill personality, Shanks would often tease you and flirt with you, especially when his drunk, pushing your buttons in every way he can to see you get flustered or get you to say something back. But of course he would back of if you get uncomfortable.

• Sometimes he'll say something out of pocket just to see what your reaction would be.

• When it comes to your hair he loves the feeling of it between his fingers, often patting your head, ot would happen so much you expect him to scratch your head when your next to him. He just can't get enough of it.

• Now when it comes to your mask, he sees it as a part of you even if his curious to see you without it on. He'll respect your privacy if you say no.

• If you wear the mask because of a scar you wish to hide, he'll tell you no matter how bad it mite be they'll mist likely things it's amazing. If you wear it because of fashion, he'll want to see all of your maskes and ask whice would fit him. If you wear it for special reasons whether it's a family item or for special needs, he'll make sure no one tries to take it off forcefully.

• Shanks finds your detective skills impressive and will often ask you to find things or go out on islands with him to see if you can help find anything of value, basically treasure hunting. Naturally he'll ask what kind if mysterys you have solved and oh heaven if you start ranting to him about it he'll be so lost but be happy to listen anyway just to see you excited to talk.

• After some time Shanks will grow found of you and will most likely develop into a casually relationship, even if it's casually he'll still stay loyal to you, with lots of cuddling, kisses, some how even more head pats.

• If any conflict where to happen with an enemy and your close by, he'll make sure your behide him.

• And oh heaven does he love making out with you in small hidden places, hand in your hair and body's pressed together, the thrill you both want and feel just drives you both over.

...............................................

EXTRA

You could feel Shanks arm holding you close to him as you sat on his lap, having another party for who knows what reason thus time. His hand going to ruffle your hair every no and then.

After late into the night you finally managed to help get him to bed, bit before you could leave to help the others your pulled into bed with him, his alcohol breath hot on your neck as he whispered to you, his eyes closed, mumbling "Don't leave me" his arm pulling you closer to him by your waist, pulling you under the blanket "my little mystery, so beautiful" you can't help but smile at the drunken goofball, pulling your mask down to kiss his forehead. "I'll stay right by your side captain" "promise" "with my life" happy with your response he plays with your hair as you both fall asleep in each other's hold.

#one piece #ideas #shanks #shanks x m!reader #shanks x male reader #shanks x reader #your ocs #oc

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lesbianrobin · 1 year

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ok but if you HAD to write r0nance, how would you go about it?

fun question! i have actually thought about this before and i've had two ideas for awhile now but one of them is unrequited and the other is steve centric so i'm gonna combine them sorta!

if i had to write a ro/nance fic i would write it from steve's pov. i'd open with nancy confessing to him that she has feelings for robin and steve comforting her about any fears she may have, being a supportive friend re: the gay part, but he'd be internally having an absolute crisis because he's pretty sure robin likes nancy back and the thought of them dating makes him want to throw up and die. nancy would ask if he thinks she might have a chance, and he would lie and say he has no idea (he knows robin would say yes), but that robin would definitely be supportive if nancy told her she likes girls. he would leave this conversation wanting nothing more than to go straight to robin and talk through it with her, but it's ABOUT her so he can't and he just has to try and figure out what to do on his own.

the whole point of the fic would basically be steve spectating as robin and nancy kinda inch closer to a relationship and him realizing he is Not as over the cheating thing as he thought because every time they flirt in front of him he just wants to grab robin and wrap her in a protective little hug and keep her away from nancy forever. like i think the thought of robin getting hurt like he did literally makes him feel like he's dying and he's living in fucking dread of the day something happens between them. meanwhile nancy is maybe confiding in him periodically and he starts to think like okay she seems to genuinely like robin more than she ever liked me so this could be okay....

ultimately robin would cave and be like steve i have a confession to make 😔 and he'd be like you like nancy. and she'd be like I'M SORRY I'M THE WORST BEST FRIEND EVER 😭😭😭 and he would be like no no rob it's fine okay i get it obviously! and robin would be like i know nothing will ever even happen with her but i still felt so guilty because i REALLY like her i just had to tell you. and steve feels so guilty that robin's in this turmoil because of him and he's like well idk if it's as hopeless as you make it sound! and robin would brush it off yknow? but she seems upset about it and steve realizes these feelings are a bit more serious than a crush and he's like fuck. FUCK okay. and he goes to talk to nancy.

and i think he just flatout asks her why did you date me and cheat on me when you never even loved me in the first place? and she's like :( steve... and he's like listen okay this isn't for my sake humor me for a minute and just tell me the truth whatever you say i won't hold it against you. and i'm a bit conflicted on nancy's response here because i do think her being like "well i think i'm actually a lesbian and i was just trying so hard to be straight and when we fought i panicked and went to jonathan" could be in character and it would probably put steve's mind at ease a bit but it also feels like a bit of a copout to me personally? so i would probably go another route and have nancy be like "honestly i don't really know why i did it i think i was just still fucked up from losing barb and i needed somebody to make me feel less alone and keep my mind off of her... and then with jonathan i think us hooking up initially was partially just because murray got into our heads and partially because i was lonely and i couldn't stop thinking about barb and it kept my mind off of her which i know is evil it's terrible but it's the truth."

and steve would be like okay. do you think you're over that? and nancy would be like her death? and steve would be like no i know that's gonna be something that stays with you but like are you over needing to distract yourself. can you actually like think about what you're doing and stop yourself before you hurt someone. and nancy would be like steve what's- and he's like nance. just be honest. and nancy would be like well... i think so. i think i'm in a better place now. i don't try and push away the thoughts of her yknow i just let myself think about her and it hurts less. i wouldn't... i won't do it again. i know it wasn't fair to you. i'm sorry, i was selfish because i was hurting and i know i can't do that shit to people.

steve would look in her eyes and make a decision. and he'd say okay then. if you hurt robin i'm gonna have to kill you and i'm not joking. and nancy's like wait what and he's like you heard me and she's like wait oh my god so you think i have a chance??? and he's like nancy for a smart person you can be kinda stupid sometimes obviously she likes you too have you even been paying attention? and she's like oh fuck you oh my god. oh my god what should i do. does she like bowling? no bowling alleys are gross we should go to the movies. and steve's like yeah robin loves movies and nancy's like yes okay perfect!! ...thank you. and for what it's worth i promise you i won't mess up like i did with you. and steve says i know. because if you did like i said i would have to kill you. it's in mine and robin's best friend contract. and then he and nancy would hug and i think for the first time since their breakup steve really feels like nancy is someone he can trust.

and i'd end the fic with a little flash forward of robin telling steve about how she accidentally pulled the arm move on nancy in the movie theater because she was actually just stretching but then nancy snuggled up to her she SNUGGLED steve oh my god she's so tiny and then she kept whispering little facts about actors and i felt like the luckiest girl in the WORLD!!!! and steve would be so happy for her and suggest that she ask out nancy next time and he knows a restaurant that she really likes 💕

btw some people might argue this isn't really a ro/nance fic because it focuses on steve but i will argue that all three of my steddie oneshots are from outside perspectives kinda focusing on the mindset of that person and nobody's ever argued those aren't steddie fics SO i think it counts. anyway yeah 💖 thanks for asking!

#asks #em talks

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echantedtoon · 7 months

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Demon Bride Ch53 Karaku Is Working On It

(WARNINGS!!: Karaku IS his own warning. Possibly some innuendos. Mentioning of Sakura's past actions. Yn LITERALLY snacks sense into Sekido when he calls Karaku stupid but he later redeems himself.)

(Author's Note: This chapters events spans about two months after Douma speaks to Yn about Sakura. The Hantengu's Bros Arc is slowly coming to a close. The quadruplets will be around for maybe one or two more chapters after this one.)

You know. You were expecting things to be a little bit different than before sure. But what you didn't expect really was that you would be woken up by... Nothing. No knocking. No voices. No Rui going to school. Just blissful slumber until you woke up on your own. The breakfast just left on your doorstep. They didn't even wake you up for it. Odd. But VERY much welcome.

It was a WONDERFUL day.

You actually got to sleep in for a long time, eat breakfast at your own pace, got to be left alone, and treated yourself to a long, long hot bath and book reading session. No one bothered you other than another knock on the door that was just lunch being left on your doorstep and then again later today when Rui got home and was holding...his puppy??

"... Don't tell me you brought your puppy to school! You're not supposed to do that. What if she got lost while you weren't looking."

"I know. Sensai said the same thing when he saw her. But Arachnid will get so lonely without me! How can I abandon her?"

"Sekido assigned someone to look after her while you're at school. Leave Arachnid home from now on and play with her until you get back. Ok?"

He sighed. "Ok."

"Good. Now come eat dinner and then it's bedtime for you."

It was a good day. You didn't feel stressed anymore so you guessed Douma was right about you releasing all the pent-up stress out on Sakura. Which you still felt bad about but she did attack you first. Sigh...You'd think about this later. The next day however you DID have a visitor. Just a little while after Rui left for school. A knocking on your door had you opening it up only to discover Aizetsu on the other side, and he was...smiling?

"U-Um...I-I hope I'm not disturbing you."

"No. What's brought you here?"

"Um.." He suddenly looked embarrassed and rubbed his neck and you noticed that he had a book in his hands. "I-I was done with a b-book and wondered if you wanted to read it? A-And maybe spend time with..me.." He looked away embarrassed. "Reading other books...to-together."

You immediately smiled. "Of course I would! Come on in!"

The blue eyed demon smiled and came on in. The rest of the day was filled with you in Aizetsu's lap as you two read through the books. Three days later Aizetsu came back again with even more books. And it continued onwards like that with Aizetsu for a while. Apparently his brothers and himself all agreed on letting them all individually spend time with you in their own ways. Oh. That was nice. But I'm the middle of it all you had a knock on the door and answered it only to see Karaku there smiling and crossing his arms.

"Karaku? What are you doing here?"

He smirked. "I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd stop by.~ Also I thought of a math equation. You-" he pointed at you. "-plus me-" he then pointed at himself. "-equals dinner together.~"

"No." He froze as you shook your head. "Sorry. I already made arrangements to spend time with Aizetsu and ONLY Aizetsu for a few days. You'll have to check back when I'm not busy. Why don't you just spend time with your father and little brother? I'm sure they'll be much better company."

You then politely closed the door. A few days later you were expecting Aizetsu back only to jump when the door suddenly flew open and Urogi announced his presence.

"Hey, Dove!!" He just allowed himself into your room. Happily chuckling noticing that you jumped. "I'm here for my turn with ya!"

"...OK!! NEW RULE!!" You scowled firmly standing up and pointing at him with a serious look that made Urogi pause. "If you EVER enter my room without knocking or asking again I will NEVER go out with you again. Privacy is basic decency. Understood?" He gulped and quickly nodded. "Good. Now what are you here for?"

He instantly smiled again. "It's my turn to spend some time with you! I was thinking we should go out again and hunt or fish!"

That immediately caught your attention. "Really?! Like REAL hunting and fishing REAL game!!" You smiled. "Real fish and rabbits and wild turkeys?!"

"And deer and ducks and whatever else you want, Princess.~ In the real wild forest!" He then flexed an arm up. "Not to brag but I have a really good catching streak!"

"When can we leave?!"

Urogi threw his head back and cackled. "Whenever you want, Pigeon.~"

And thus started the trend of the female servants nearly fainting it terror or screaming and running away or looking disgusted at you when you started going out with Urogi every few days and came back with a few things. The first day he took you out, you brought back a few ducks which you then gave to the shocked kitchen staff and you looked quite a mess. The female head of the dwell, Yoko, actually fainted into her husband's arms the next time he took you out and brought back an entire deer you brought down by tackling it with your newfound speed and strength. One good thing from your new demon body. Often when you came back you were dirty, and a mess and your kimonos were ruined. BUT GODS WERE YOU HAVING FUN AND FEELING ALIVE AFTER SO LONG!! After a particular trip back Karaku had ran into you while coming down the hallway with Urogi whom was carrying a boar that'd surely be made into delicious pork later. The green eyed demon had looked surprised seeing you both there but nearly burst out laughing at the sight of you covered in dirt and with a few leaves stuck to your hair.

"Hahaha! Wow. You like you had fun! What happened?"

"I brought down a boar by tackling it to the ground." You jabbed a thumb at Urogi whom was easily lugging said wild game on his shoulder with an amused grin. "Feels good to get some workout in."

Urogi chuckled. "She's pretty fun to hunt with I'll tell you that much.~ Like a tigress on the prowl."

"That's great!" Karaku clapped his hands with a wide smile. "Then we can go do that when we go out!"

"Sorry. I can't." He immediately paused. "Urogi promised to teach me how to catch fish with my bare hands. But perhaps a different time. Excuse me. I need to go wash off."

You then stepped around him leaving him standing there and Urogi patted his shoulder with a genuine smile his way. "Be a little patient, Bro. Tell you what. I'll be sure to put in a good word for you with her."

"Thanks. ... Appreciate it."

However the next brother to greet you a week later after your last run in with Karaku wasn't Karaku himself, but an grumpy looking red eyed demon who knocked on your door expecting you to answer.

"Hmph. It's about time. I've been waiting long enough."

You brow rose at him. Already feeling a bit cranky from the loud knocking and attitude he gave you. "What do you want, Sekido?"

"I'm here to spend my amount of courting time with you of course! What else would I be here for?!" Your brow rose higher. "Now get ready. We're going out!"

You crossed your arms. "Uh huh. Y'know..To be honest I was expecting you to be Karaku again asking me for a date."

Sekido scoffed Rolling his red eyes. "That idiot is always doing things stupidly." Your eyes focused on him dangerous. "That's why he gets himself in so many stup-"

S M A C K!!

A MASSIVE slap sound echoed throughout the hallway and bounced off the walls in echoed slowly fading away. There was a stinging in your hand and in Sekido's left cheek as he suddenly found himself staring in the other hand, his head whiplashed to the side. For a long moment nobody spoke until Sekido slowly looked back to you absolutely stunned silent meeting your rage filled eyes.

"Your brothers are not stupid. I've heard you calling all of them everything from 'bumbling idiots' to 'stupid'....I do not tolerate that bullshit in my presence.And you're lucky I didn't strike you hard enough to break your neck for doing that. Aizetsu is a bit clumsy but good meaning. Urogi is easily forgetful but he's a good guy. Karaku...Heh. Karaku is a n asshole a lot of the time but he isn't stupid. He made some stupid mistakes and suffered from it but guess what. So did I. You better not speak of Zohakuten or your father that way either." Your hand harshly grabbed the door. "I won't be seen with a man who degrades his family in such a disgusting manner. I'd consider it an embarrassment. Until you can get your egotistical angry head out of your ass and get it then you can consider yourself banned from me entirely."

S L A M!!

AND the door was slammed in the stunned demon's face. Honestly you weren't really expecting Sekido to come back. Or for him to beg for forgiveness. But only a week later there was another knock on your door and you answered to the presence of Sekido to your surprise. But after a moment of silence you just frowned at him crossing your arms and waiting for him to speak. Red eyes stared intently at your frown. You didn't budge. Not even bothering to ask why he was there. Until his eyes slowly lowered by him bending at the knees. Your eyes didn't look away still making eye contact with him until he sat on his legs hands on his knees. After another few seconds of intense staring, he leaned over until his head bowed over silently. He was bowing at you silently.

"Nothing to say for yourself?" He remained silent. ...Honestly this was probably the closest thing to an actual admission to he was wrong that Sekido would be giving you. "....You know what you did was really bad and it could really hurt someone. As long as you don't do it again and treat me without demanding things from me, then I can just give you a warning this time. Next time I won't be so nice." A hand gently placed itself on his head. "Now get up and raise your head. I want to go on a walk with you."

He looked up at you and your hand slowly removed itself from his face only for him to grab it and press his lips it it's palm with a small hum. "... You'll be my wife by the end of this year. I need your presence."

"We'll see. But for now let's go on that walk then we can get something to eat and this time I'll pay for it no matter what you say."

You were surprised when Sekido was mostly silent for most of the time you both were together. Mostly he let you talk and he listened to what you said. There was still plenty of hiccups when you both went out mostly on walks or Sekido would take you to a few quiet places such as the book store or a restaurant, and there sometimes was a few men who'd stare at you which earnt Sekido's wrath. You remembered one time you were getting a few ink stones as a gift for Kyogai at the book store when a hand grabbed your arm and you looked up at an unknown man smiling at you.

"Hey. You look lost. May I escort you to where you're going?~"

He was grabbed by the collar and YANKED away from you a second later by a VERY raged looking Sekido who snarled at him. "FUCK OFF!! THAT'S MY FIANCE YOU PERVERTED FUCK!!"

To his credit he didn't try to instantly pummel the guy but his arms were shaking badly as he watched the man instantly take off. Then he just wrapped his arms around you pulling you to himself. Making you raise an amused brow.

"I didn't know you were so protective."

He scoffed as rested his head on yours pulling you against him."You smell like Aster flowers to my bumb- ...*ahem* To myself and my brothers. Your scent is unnaturally sweet to others as well. It's...very attracting like what draws bees to flowers." He paused as you patted his arms.

"Well then let's go pay for the ink stones and get on our way. I wanna treat my big, strong fiance to some home cooked pork I caught just two weeks ago.~"

His face lit up red..but then he blinked. "Wait. Did you say you caught a wild pig?!"

From then on whenever you both went out Sekido would always have either an arm wrapped around your shoulders or waist, be holding your hand, or having you hang onto his arm. You noticed that less men looked at you then. The few that dared to look were usually scared away by Sekido sending a silent snarl they're way. This time you didn't run into Karaku until much later after Sekido stopped visiting. But it still wasn't him who knocked on your door. When you answered the knocking one day when Rui was home, you were surprised to see none other than Zohakuten and Mr. Hantengu there.

Zohakuten looked annoyed and had his arms crossed before huffing. "My father says in order to become proper in-laws we have to be better acquainted outside of my brothers. We're here to have lunch with you and talk."

Rui looked up annoyed from his book holding a sleeping Arachnid in his lap but you shot him a knowing glare. "Rui and I would be delighted to have you both over for lunch. Please come right in.'' You politely stepped aside with a smile that made the teenager pause. "I'll go ahead and get a servant to get some food for you all. I hope miso ramen is alright. Your father must be tired. Come sit down."

"...Hmph. I will give you one thing, despite your unladylike behavior at least you know how to treat your gu-AH!!"

Said teenager winced as a firm hand gripped his ear and yanked him harshly. "Forgive him. My son is still inexperienced. So inexperienced. He has a tendency to say things that I find insulting. Forgive him."

Rui snickered hiding his face behind the book he held when you shot him a glare. "Oh. It's alright. Children will be children. Come inside."

It was in the middle of lunch and Mr. Hantengu's ramblings of how a little Sekido used to be so shy and hide behind his legs when the door knocked and you answered it only to see Karaku again. He smiled wider and winked at you.

"Hey, Beautiful.~"

"Karaku. What a nice surprise. Are you looking for your father?," you politely greeted him making Zohakuten look over at you both curiously.

He shook his long black hair before smiling wider. "Nah. I figured I was overstepping on everyone's else's time with you so I waited til Sekido's turn was over with before coming back."

You blinked lightly surprised before nodding. "That's very considerate of you."

"So we'll go out then?!"

You shook your head. "I promised Rui I'd spend time with him today, and I'm having lunch with your family. I'm sorry but not going out today."

"Then maybe we can go out tomorrow? Or later this week! Whenever you want -" he paused as you calmly held up a hand to him.

"Karaku, Im not going to go out with you. Not yet. It's nothing against you, it's really not. But you still haven't proved to me that you're going to be taking this seriously or change how you treated me before. I'm still willing to give you a chance, but you have to show me you're willing to put in the work. Just asking me to go with you over and over isn't proving anything. I'm sorry, but until then please don't ask me again."

You left him just standing there blankly slowly closing the door in his face-

"And then she just shut the door in my face!," Karaku yelled out frustrated from where he just laid on the floor staring at the ceiling.

His father hummed just a little aways from him carefully seeing up a hole in a pair of Zohakuten's pants. He always played so roughly during training. Good thing he learnt how to sew three hundred years ago. Zoha was just lazily watching one of his older brothers sulk on the ground boredly.

"I TRIED LITERALLY EVERYTHING!!", Karaku yelled out frustrated throwing up his arms, "FLOWERS!! GIFTS!! FLIRTING!! ASKING!! I TRIED EVERYTHING SHORT OF JUST THROWING MYSELF AT HER FEET AND BEGGING HER!! WHY WOULD SHE BOTHER HELPING ME OUT IF SHE DOESN'T HAVE INTEREST?! WHY BOTHER TO GIVE ME A CHANCE THEN?!" His arms flopped back to the floor. "I just... don't get it, Dad. I've done everything right. Haven't I?"

"Perhaps that is your problem." Green eyes tilted upwards towards the shaky hand sewing demon. "You are doing what YOU THINK she'd like, but have you ever p-paused to consider that perhaps how you do things isn't what she wants?"

"But all girls like flowers and gifts. Aizetsu and Sekido gave her flowers and she loved them! She's always doing things with them... What's so different from me?"

The sewing was paused as the older demon sighed and looked at him. "My son. The way you act IS what she didn't like. It's true you may have stopped that behavior but she does not see you proving you did. Giving her material gifts does not reveal which intention is behind it."

Karaku blinked before turning from his back to lay on his stomach to look at him better. "Then... How do I prove to her that I AM trying?!"

"That I cannot say because I am not her. You will have to think hard about what she would accept for her to believe you."

"What?!"

"Think about what she made you all do whenever you made her angry before. What did she make you do in order to make her happy again?"

Karaku groaned laying his head in a hand. "*Sigh* She yelled at us and hit us with a giant stick and then she made us apologize to everyone she thought we wronged and then you made us apologize to her...for.." He slowly trailed off as his green eyes widened as a thought crossed over his mind. "Uh...Hey, Pops. Do you still have that random stack of papers around here?"

"Of course."

"Good, good. Um..I'm going to need them and for you to watch me write a lot of letters so I can have some witnesses. Lots ..and LOTS of letters."

You didn't see Karaku again for almost two weeks. You did see his brothers once or twice and Douma once when he popped back in annoyingly, but no Karaku which you supposed might be for the best if he really wasn't interested after all and left you alone. You should return that courting gift he gave you though. It wouldn't be right to keep it when he wasn't courting you after all... You'd give it to Aizetsu and have him give it back to Karaku. However you weren't expecting the frantic knocking on your door and you answering it to see the sight of a panting Karaku on the other side.

"Hey...I-....Hhhhhaaa." He leaned over one hand on the doorframe heaving for air. "Give...A-A minute."

You blinked. "Karaku?" He was a bit sweaty and wheezed like he ran a hundred miles uphill. "What happened to you? Is something wrong?"

"I- ...got you....*GASP* T-This." A hand shakily held up a single tulip. "F-for...you.."

You blinked... slowly taking the flower before looking back at him. "Thank you? But that doesn't answer my question."

"I-I was...Oh gods.." He inhaled and leaned back up with a sigh. "I came as soon as I heard all my...letters were given out finally."

"Letters?" Your brow rose. "What are you talking about?"

"My letters to all my exes." This time both your brows skyrocketed up and he instantly held up his hands. "It's not what you think! Look. I know you think I'm...Well a womanizer and maybe I am, but I don't want anyone but YOU! Not Sakura or anyone else! So I did this!" His arms were thrown out. "I wrote apology letters to every single one of my exes with the exception of the bitch you battered. Took me a while and a lot of paper. Gods. So much paper. But I did it! I apologized for everything! So...please?"

You continued to stare at his pleading eyes before slowly looking down at the flower you held. Karaku...Apologized to all his ex lovers? ALL OF THEM?! You stared at the flower in shock before slowly turning into a thinking face ... Before looking back at him.

"Karaku."

"Yeah?"

"Are you free today?"

Karaku felt himself go shocked for a moment before again his eyes lit up again and a giant grin spread out on his face. "YOU'RE SERIOUS?!" You nodded. "HOLY FUCK YES!!"

You squealed as suddenly two arms wrapped around you suddenly and you found yourself twirled around a few times by strong arms before you were sat back down on your feet in front of a genuinely happy smiling Karaku.

"You'll love this! You like cherry blossoms right?! What an I saying? Everyone loves those! You'll love this part of a mountain I know!" He grabbed your hand and started pulling you towards the door. "C'mon! Nakime will know what spot I mean when I tell her!"

You rose a brow but allowed him to excitedly pull you behind him and out of the Dwell. Long story short, he took a confusion route until he found that weird lady and kept bugging her until she sighed and just raised her instrument.

STRUM!!

In an instant you both were teleported. One moment you were in the Infinity Castle and the next you stood somewhere windy. Karaku in front of you grabbing the sides of your head and stepping to make you face a different direction but not allowing you to look anywhere but him. It made you a bit red in the face from his close approximity. Huh. Those green eyes were pretty now that you thought about it.

"And look behind you." He let you go then and stepped back.

You blinked for a moment before looking around you and freezing at what you saw. Wind blew through trees as there was instantly a sweet perfumed scent in the air. The warm breeze scattered about hundreds of thousands of pink petals as they blew through the wind dislodged from countless and countless cherry blossom trees that swayed in the golden sunlight under the deep blue sky. Hundreds of pink petals hit your body and the wing blue your hair around. Slowly you caught one as it blew by before it was again reclaimed by the wind. Slowly you looked from the trees to see a decently sized stream close by which was FULL of petals carrying them away to places unknown. Slowly your eyes turned to Karaku again as he tilted his head smiling, arms crossed.

"Pretty beautiful huh?" He looked around himself before chuckling. "It's tradition to confess under these trees right?" He shrugged. "Thought it'd be appropriate for a courting session."

"Are you kidding me?" He paused but you lit up. "THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!" You held out your arms twirling and cascaded a flurry of petals around you. "I've never seen this many at once before! This place is absolutely beautiful!! How did you even find this place?"

"It's actually the spot my parents had their wedding." He shrugged. "You can say it's been in the family for a while." He then smirked and leaned over as you blinked. "So this is the part I confess to you. Well I already love you. So does that mean we can skip directly to the true love's kiss?~"

Instead of getting angry like he expected you actually rolled your eyes and smiled. "Yeah right. You couldn't get a kiss even if you caught one."

Karaku blinked... before a large and mischievous smirk graced his face and he chuckled lowly making you pause. "Oh really?~ Is that a challenge, Princess?~"

He purr-growled in glee. You froze. "Karaku, NO!" He uncrossed his arms wiggling his eyes at you. "No! NO! I said no!" You took a step back. "Karaku I swear if you even think-"

"RAW!!"

You squealed out loudly as he suddenly jumped up holding his arms up and you ducked as he lunged to grab you. You dodged his lunge before running off towards a couple trees, your senses heightening as you heard him quickly follow. Despite how you SHOULD'VE been reacting to this your mouth broke out in a grin and you ran a little faster- Squealing again as you felt a hand almost snatch your shoulder. Eventually you ran around a tree and stopped turning around and facing Karaku who was on the other side of the tree. You both leaned back and forth. A wide smile on his face and a chorus of laughs escaping his mouth as he blocked your way this way and that.

"You can always just give up at let me catch you.~"

"Want a kiss? Gotta earn it!"

His pupils dilated and he gave a heightened growl of glee. You made a break for it to the left back towards the stream and immediately you heard footsteps behind you- You squealed as two strong arms wrapped around your waist lifting you up and both of you tripped over yourselves-

SPLASH!!

You both just fell into the stream and immediately cold water seeped into your bones. Karaku was first to get up coughing a little and spitting out a few pink petals. A few pink petals cling to him from the water and he groaned reaching up to rub his face before opening his eyes.

SPLASH!!

"HEY!!"

His hands flew up to cover his face from water before his green eyes blinked as laughter filled his ears. And he froze. There you were smiling and laughing at him. Your hair a mess but sunlight glittering off of the droplets of water making you skin look like it was made of diamonds. Your skin decorated with hundreds of pink petals matching her intoxicating scent. Cheeks a warm hue and lips a pretty color. You squealed again as strong arms wrapped around your body and turned you, pressing you against a very toned chest. For a brief second you saw emerald eyes and then the next thing a pair of lips clasped into yours. And for a moment nothing else happened before he pulled away as you looked shocked at him.

"Oh. Um..Shit. Sorry. Guessed I should've asked first huh?" You rose a brow. "Um I- DWAH!!"

He suddenly found himself clutching you as he was dipped. One hand holding his back and the other gripping his leg and he stared shocked until something punched his own mouth and he stared shocked as you kissed him before pulling away as he continued to stare dumbfounded.

"This was fun. Let's come back again two days from now and have a picnic together. After all you need time to court me without your brothers too."

"....If it's wrong for me to want a dominant woman in this relationship, then I Sekido's right about me being crazy."

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chaosgremlinmunson · 8 months

Text

Part two of this:

When they pulled into forest hills park Eddie was shaking, someone had hurt Steve. Someone had hurt the man Eddie loved and he needed to be calm.

He went and opened Steve's door holding his hand as they made their way into the house, Steve pressing into his side, he walked them to the couch and sat, pulling Steve to his lap like it was second nature.

"Shhh, angel, I'm here, I'm right here. It's ok, it's ok, just let it go. I'll be here the whole time." He ran his hands up and down Steve's back who was crying again, his face buried in Eddie's neck.

After a while Steve's shaking stopped, his own hands playing with the curls closest to him.

"Eddie?" He said quietly, his face still burrowed in Eddie's shoulder.

"Yeah, sunshine?" Eddie's arms tightened around Steve just a fraction.

"I…went to the hideout tonight to try and forget. Not about the upside down though…my parents." A shaky inhale, "they came home earlier then I thought they would. I had just walked in and saw my dad with my journal, so I turned and ran. I went to town, and ran into someone. This guy I'd known from the country club growing up, his name is Scott. Well, Scott offered to take me out tonight, and I was so lonely I went. I didn't think…I didn't think he'd.." a hiccup as fresh tears fell, "he'd always been so nice to me. So when he asked what was wrong I told him about the journal. About how my parents had found out I was bisexual, and he, Eddie, he was still being nice and I just went to the bathroom. That's a normal thing to do.. he'd followed me. He cornered me and started telling me how he'd always known I was a slut. I'd always been a cock tease with my little running shorts, and tight shirts, that my pouty mouth was..just made for… eddie he tried to force me. I told him to stop and he choked me." Steve was fully crying again. His body shaking.

"Steve, you didn't deserve that. You never asked for this. What he did is on him, it sounds like he'd always been looking for an excuse and used you coming out to him as that reason. You deserve sunshine, and love, butterflies. Not this, never this." Eddie hugged him closely, "not every man you meet will see you that way. There's men who would go to war for you. Men who would sell their soul just to be able to tell you how perfect you are. As for your parents, you're not going back there." A gasp, "No, Stevie, you're going to stay here. For as long as you need, if you choose somewhere else that's fine, but this can be your home. I'll never let anyone hurt you."

Steve clung to him, his breathing hiccuping as the words washed over him.

"You'd keep me? Even knowing I'm not straight? You'd keep me?" His voice was hoarse and so hopeful.

"Baby, I would keep you forever if you'd let me.."

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #steve harrington x eddie munson #steddie ficlet #sprint fic #hurt and comfort

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zipperrants · 17 days

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ME AND VERA (This is the name of the achilles reincarnated dr girlfriend) AS INCORRECT QUOTES

Vera: Ugh, crushes are so dumb. Zipper: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid. Vera: But you’re always acting stupid? Zipper: ... Zipper: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

Vera, throwing their head into Zipper's lap: Tell me I'm pretty! Zipper, lovingly stroking their hair: You're pretty fucking annoying, that's what you are.

Vera: Do you want to know your gay name? Zipper: My... my gay name? Vera: Yeah, it's your first name- Zipper: Haha. Very funny Vera- Vera: *gets down on one knee* And my last name. Zipper: Oh- oh my god.

Zipper, sweating: Vera, there’s something I need to ask you- Vera: Finally! You’re proposing! Zipper: How’d you know? Vera: Zipper, you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner. Vera: I even picked it up once

Vera: This date is boring! Zipper: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store. Vera: Then why did you invite me? Zipper: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Zipper I'll do whatever I want!

Vera: Are you sure Zipper's even gay? They barely even looked at me. (Zipper barely looked at her because they blush every time they do)

Vera: Valentine’s day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos- Zipper: I wrote you a poem. Vera, already crying:You did?

Zipper: The stars are so beautiful... Vera: They're just giant balls of gas. Zipper: You know what, if you're just going to ruin this, then- Vera: And yet none of them are as huge as my love for you. Zipper: Oh...

Zipper: Goodnight to the love of my life, Vera, and fuck the rest of y'all.

Vera: I’m in love with you. Zipper: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork. Vera: I know. Zipper: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-

Vera: Zipper and I are no longer friends. Zipper: VERA THAT IS THE WORST WAY TO TELL PEOPLE THAT WE’RE DATING!

Vera: You got a date yet Zipper? Zipper: No... Vera: Well you do now! Get your ass up and hold my hand!

Zipper, trying to flirt with Vera: I think both of our families suck.

Zipper: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers? Vera: Peonies, why? Zipper: Vera: Were you going to get me flowers? Zipper: Vera: Zipper: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

Vera: I owe you one. Zipper: That’s ok. You can just date me and we’ll call it even

Zipper: Cause your pretty and your smart, and your ignoring me so your obviously my type. Vera, who was distracted: I'm sorry- what were you saying? Zipper: Perfect.

Zipper: I don't know how to tell you this, but... I love you. Vera: That's great, Zipper. Especially considering the fact we've been married for 6 fucking years.

*Vera and Zipper are in Paris.* Vera: I'm...moved. I...I don't know what it is I'm feeling right now. I feel...destiny? Zipper: But... Vera: I don't know what it is. I feel like... I just never thought I'd see it with my own two eyes. And here it is. It's just there. It's right in front of me, and... Zipper: This is what you wanted to see? The bridge from Inception? Vera: Yeah. Zipper: But the Eiffel Tower is behind us, babe. Vera: Yeah, but this is the bridge FROM INCEPTION. Zipper: Okay, alright.

Zipper: Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us. Vera: If the window's open and you time it right, you can do both.

Zipper: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine. Vera: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again. Zipper: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns?? Vera: Is it working?

Vera: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized. Zipper: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely* Vera: That one. I want that one.

Vera: Is something burning? Zipper, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you. Vera: Zipper, the toaster is literally on fire.

Vera: I think I just figured something out. I got to go. Zipper: Aren't you forgetting something? Vera: Uuh...*hesitantly kisses Zipper's forehead before running out.* Zipper: No, pay your bill! Damn, who raised you?

Vera: How much did you spend on this date? Zipper: $1400. But all of it's on credit cards, so it's like $5 a month for the next 2,000 years

Zipper: My crush isn’t picking up on my hints. Vera: What hints have you given them? Zipper: Well, I think about them a lot. Zipper: And sometimes I even think about talking to them.

Zipper: Are you trying to seduce me? Vera: Why, are you seducible?

Zipper: My hands are cold. Vera: Here, let me hold them. Zipper: My lips are cold too. Vera: *covers Zipper's mouth with their hand*

Vera: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt. Zipper: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

Vera: Let’s watch Sharkboy and Lavagirl. Zipper: Okay. Vera: And make out during the scary parts. Zipper: Th- Zipper: The scary parts. Zipper: Of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

Vera: I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight. Zipper: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther? Vera, already taking off their clothes: God, Zipper, you’re so fucking stupid.

Vera: Stop doing that. Zipper: Stop doing what? Vera: Saying things that make me wanna kiss the hell out of you.

Vera: *Laughs* Babe, you had a crush on me? That’s embarrassing— Zipper: We’re married.

Zipper: So you like cats? Vera: Yeah. Zipper: *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

Zipper: Vera, you love me, right? Vera: Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

Vera: Okay, but if your not gay then why are you always holding my hand and kissing me and telling me I’m your girlfriend? Zipper: Dude- Its satire! Vera: THAT'S NOT WHAT SATIRE MEANS!

#zipper rants #zipper is back on their bullshit #shiftblr #shifting #shifting realities #shifters #desired reality #reality shifter #reality shift #reality shifting #me and my partners as incorrect quotes #Vera Jane Madison #imma start to make tags for my dr partners.

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carrotkayt · 3 months

Text

Introduction, rabbit hole, personal note

Personally I've lost sense of what a feeling sounds like. I just know my sight to see the world is veiled by my ambivalence with being a part of it and that feels like something.

What trips me up is the words and phrases all smashed into 90 second videos, interfering with my ability to actually do anything because I'd rather watch than play, an unfamiliar game. All the words we have for brainwashing. Insemination, dogmatic, narcissistic, propaganda shoved down the opticals, spectacle.

The ironic, the hopeful, maybe this will help someone else while they go through the process, now I'm wondering if sharing actualizes what you're doing, and I'm afraid to share. Or if it just contributes to the fog. Discovering that this fog is a smoke filled consciousness echo, saying fix this fix that fix it. Inside a self righteous thunderdome for the entertainment of many, and the first platforms to live stream genocides.

Have you not experienced ego death? OH, its radicalizing, you have to see for yourself then maybe you'll understand where I'm coming from.

Am I being dramatic.

Whatever, I'm bothered.

Bothered by society, bothered by humanity, or the lack there of, fully aware that I'm bothered by my perception but I promise I've seen through others, brightly colored, softly toned, calm stone below the crisp and shallow puddle but still underneath it all, I come back here for a reason.

There's something with our psyche, a bug, a virus, an error alert you can't just hit X. Ultimately I feel like we could at least agree on that. We deal with these popups all day, in many different ways.

Ok ok, scroll past the rabbit hole or read me through

It's intermission during the show and we decide mid conversation to start remembering backwards all the things we had said. And its really fucking hard, like memory is weird enough and now it's being tested? But I really think it's necessary, and arguments are inevitable. And to get past it all we need to be is open with a filter, the rest is just the process, processing, in a perfect mind.

But were not, we don't have perfect minds, we don't live in a perfect world, I haven't been able to re trace a conversation without yelling since the first time I tried when we were like 10 or something.

So what if we're required, to stop and listen, hear the experiences around me, its not just mine that weighs when I'm crying, there are so many of us and we all have our own to share.

Small set backs you re-calculate and re code, continue with the day. Within that we have different understandings of a small set-back.

But harsher road blocks are placed systemically for us to go through together because how the hell can a mind be well, when you have a piece of it brutalizing and dehumanizing itself with its apparently gained power? I know we can do this to ourselves everyday in small ways.

And how are we supposed be okay with this as reality! It's so easy to close your eyes when the worst isn't happening to you. The thing is there's a worse state of being that you just thought of, or you might agree that it's a malfunction to normalize the effects of poison without treating it's sickly condition. A trick of the mind.

We rationalize our misfortunes under the pretense that one is better then one, then dare to say we deserve what we have because of who I am. And who are you?

The child of a mother of a mother of a mother, where do you think I came from?

I'm going to share a corner of grief, because under the screen under the stars under the eye lids and empty hellos, I'm really fucking lonely.

I noticed you in my fear of connection, reconnecting, wanting to connect.

I've deleted, blocked and removed myself from all social platforms at least 3 times, and in just that moment of humiliation erased every number, every face, every voice, every friend that ever existed within a 10 year sphere of community. Which sounds just digital but it showed me how badly I keep in touch. That has something to do with being seen, and everything to do with seeing myself. Why is that so disgusting. 12th house sun? 1st house rising? Probably my Mercury in Pisces, something aspects around and around this deep dark pit and it makes me so fucking difficult to be around.

They tried to teach me but I don't think I understand.

And I think that's what I am most pissed off about. From the age of diapers, according to my mom, I had an expression of no fucking way are you gonna control me. Have charge over me. And with that one moment I became free to destroy myself as long as it was safe.

As long as someone could watch.

As long as someone knew.

And I never got prepared to protect myself.

With all the appreciation and gratitude I owe my parents, and the adults that raised me in tandem, and the blessing of a life I was gifted into, today I still I have to stop myself from blaming every figure that just watched me as I walked myself off a fucking cliff.

I was a kid, why wouldn't anyone stop me. Or why didn't they know? I guess they tried in they're own way, even today the way people help doesn't seem to get though my thick ass skull. So it really is still.. me huh.

Because I knew EXACTLY what I was setting myself up for, it just happened to be rooted in slowly slowly slowly ruining myself, my ambition, my hopes, my dreams, my goal was never to succeed, not in a new smart gifted way it was to ruin myself so I could at least now, finally, have a concrete reason for why I just cant get it done.

And that's going to be a whole conversation about privilege.

Right now I just feel failed by myself and anyone who could have guided me. Even typing I'm thinking fuck! I should take it all back!

And this is the feeling, so maybe to forgive myself and everyone else I have to be okay with this feeling. Because I know things now, and I knew parts then, but I stayed quite, silent, dismissive, and willing to see what would happen. Which sounds a lot like eating the poison.

But I don't know where I am now, 10 years have passed and in a very very strange way, I'm back where I started, with a twist, and it's kind of laughable, and I am maybe enjoying this, but there is a lot, a lot to talk about.

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riddlerosehearts · 4 months

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🐍 Thank you so much again for the thorough response! I love how much thought you put into Nico, it’s so easy to tell how much you love him hehe. And yes the snake is because Jamil’s my favourite character! They also have very boopable snouts in real life. Ignihyde is full of introverts who like to stay in their own rooms, but also full of nerds who are super into whatever they’re interested in. I bet there’d be at least one or two people who like Mythomagic there if it were canon in twst (1/4?)

🐍, nobody in PJO canon seemed to share his interest so I’d love for if Nico could discover friendship through his favourite card game and be happy there… but him feeling right at home in Ramshackle with a small number of residents is also just so him. Will also strikes me as someone who’d be in RSA instead, so Nico having some people he’d be willing to stay for in NRC would be so important for him to not feel lonely. Yuu and Grim to the rescue, I hope he likes cats. (2/?) 🐍 I’d give so much to see him feel accepted and brighten up a bit more.I’ll be honest I am super, super bad at making headcanons and writing so I really enjoy reading other people’s stuff far more, I always feel embarrassed about my own ideas or just can’t come up with much. BUT Leo in Ignihyde - I think he’d have a blast with all the technology lying around that he could play with and use for inventions, even if he’s weirded out by getting sorted into somewhere so gloomy-looking at first (3/?) 🐍He might not really get what other students are nerding out about like the latest anime though, he doesn’t strike me as the type to be super into shows and media (chronically offline). He’d have a lot of projects going on in his room all the time lying around that he keeps working on, but he starts more before he finishes them because he just has so many ideas. (4/?) 🐍 not sure how he’d interact with other Ignihyde students but I suuure hope Azul never notices all the cool stuff Leo’s making because he’d want to market them, stat. Leo’s not going to be good at reading those contracts down to the fine print. Also I know the curse is a Shroud family only thing but Leo + canon flame powers makes me so want to see him with fire hair as well haha. PLEASE do share if you have your own ideas about Leo in NRC, I’d love to hear them!! (5/5) 🐍Sorry about the multiple asks, I didn't know I'd write so much either 😭 I'm actually very okay if you want to chat abt it privately like over chat or Discord (so there's no word limit) but I'm ok sticking to asks as well if you prefer!

so before i reply to all of this i will say that there's actually a way to get around the silly 500-character limit in asks! it was removed ages ago in the app, but for some reason it's still in place on the website… unless you go to the dashboard view of someone's blog (so that'd be this link for my blog) and send an ask from there. that lets you send an ask with up to 4,096 characters. don't ask how i discovered that limit LMAO. but that should work so you can stay anonymous if you want!

i love nico a ridiculous amount lol, he was my favorite PJO character ever since i first read the original books. and even though i do have some issues with the sun and the star, i still love his development. it actually reminds me a lot of how idia, even though his anxiety definitely hasn't gone away, has been shown since the end of book 6 to be making more of an effort to put himself out there and try to be friendly with his classmates because he does want to have friends, he's just traumatized and scared.

you have excellent taste for jamil being your fave. i should post some of my thoughts about scarabia on here at some point because i like both jamil and kalim a lot and could talk for ages about how fascinated i am by their dynamic, but some people have the most shockingly bad takes about jamil 😭 do you have any thoughts on what PJO cabin he'd be in?

that's true, i did think about how ignihyde probably has some students who'd be into mythomagic or a twst equivalent of it! but then i thought that since nico is still kind of closed off and most people in ignihyde are so unsociable that even cater has claimed to not have a single friend from there, he might not manage to connect with those people before transferring out. although it also occurred to me that maybe if he and leo were there in ignihyde at the same time, things could be a bit different?

see, i've always thought there were a surprising amount of similarities between leo and nico but the books never called attention to them since the two basically never got to interact. and i wish they had, because i think they could have an interesting friendship if they got to know each other better! so maybe in this AU they could be friends, and leo could be there encouraging nico to stay and helping him understand the tech. i've also gotten myself kind of attached to the idea of him moving into ramshackle though! i guess either idea could work, as long as nico gets to be happy.

i haven't had a chance to ask my friend (who i've referred to as a will solace expert because she has so many headcanons and thoughts about him) where she thinks will would end up yet! i do think that if he somehow ended up at NRC, he'd be one of the few light magic users there.

"i hope he likes cats" reminds me that i always thought it would be funny if nico DID like cats but was allergic to them. and still just insisted on having one anyway. well, hey, grim is constantly telling us that he's NOT a cat, so maybe he gets around this problem lol.

omg i totally get the feeling of being embarassed about your ideas, anon!! for the longest time i used to not really post any of my own thoughts because i feel like i'm not very creative and it made me nervous. i'm also not always the best at just thinking up general headcanons and ideas unless i've got some sort of prompt or theme to go by. even now sometimes i post headcanons about my favorite twst ships and such while thinking, what if everyone who reads this hates it. what if someone thinks my interpretation of riddle is so bad that i don't deserve my url ASKFJGFD.

i like your ideas about leo, though!! i did think a bit about how he might be as an NRC student, and i also thought he'd definitely adjust better than nico would (makes a lot of sense that he'd be weirded out by the gloomy atmosphere initially, though) and would be fascinated and excited by all the magical technology and gadgets. i also figure that since he is someone who's always seeking out quiet and personal space to be alone and work on his projects, he wouldn't mind too much that the students tend to keep to themselves. and canonically he tries to be a lot more of a loud outgoing jokester than he really is in order to cover up his insecurities and try to make people like him, so maybe he could make some friends there without feeling like he has to do that.

i think leo made a few pop culture references in the books (one i remember for sure is star trek, though he says he doesn't like it) so maybe he wouldn't quite be chronically offline but he also wouldn't be obsessive about it, because his engineering projects are his top priority. he's definitely not a gamer, but i could see him liking to have background noise while he works sometimes and putting on whatever anime everyone is talking about! …which makes me imagine one of his dorm mates getting annoyed at him because he wasn't paying enough attention to remember their favorite background character from episode 679 of one piece, lol.

oh him meeting azul would be a disaster for SURE lol, let's hope idia warns him and that he doesn't have any unfortunate encounters with floyd and jade. and i'm not sure what a fitting explanation for leo having fire hair would be but i do agree that it would be extremely cool. and for that matter, i guess we'd also need an explanation for idia and ortho's hair if they were in the PJO universe… my first thought is they could either just have normal hair (boring, but it works) or maybe it's an extremely rare hades kid thing.

#asks #anonymous #pjo #twisted wonderland #riordanverse

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farmerlesbian · 1 year

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5, 15, 21, 33

5. Are you “out” publicly? yeah! i am visibly lesbian and visibly trans/nonbinary/gnc and i flag very obviously almost all the time. i am publicly out to everyone. i'm not really able to hide it either if i wanted to.

15. How has your identity changed over time? oof well.. i .. hm. i spent a long time essentially unlabeled for my orientation because i struggled to reconcile being nonbinary and being into Ladies. and i hadn't really had many homo experiences so i wasn't even sure who i was into.

ok let's wind back a bit. so when i was a kid i knew something was.. there. i was incredibly afraid of it. (i guess now we're gonna answer the neurodivergent question haha) i couldn't even name it for myself in my own head. i would not. i was absolutely terrified.

now for context you need to know i was somewhat.. ostracized? i was lowkey bullied and i was very self-conscious, socially awkward, insecure, lonely. you know how people say little girls can tell someone is neurodivergent better than doctors? yeah. so i was extremely concerned with being Normal and being like accepted and having successful social interactions. i did not face concerns about family acceptance or religious homophobia or transphobia. this was about peer acceptance and social isolation/success.

so this is why i was terrified of the ... thing i could not name. so i wouldn't even say i was closeted because i wasn't out to myself. i remember.. telling myself something along the lines of.. like needing to be strong, and keep this secret forever and never let it out never tell anyone, ever. if i can do that it will be okay. this hyper-vigilance.

so i self identified as "boy-crazy", as a half-subconscious strategy to avoid scrutiny. i also tried very hard to make sure to act very Normal about girls and not be too avoidant with my eyes. i developed crushes on boys. now to be clear looking back on it, i intentionally did this and made sure to be conspicuous about it. oh what a time. i even had boyfriends.

around high school time i was on the internet a lot. i added tumblr to the websites i was going on and i found nonbinary people. i was fascinated by androgyny and nonbinary people, and i was learning about like social justice stuff a lot and i was like kinda Ally mode. i can't remember much exactly, i was also very much sleep deprived for much of later high school and mentally not well. i was friends with some gay people. i knew some people who were out by this time. i don't think i was thinking of myself as gay at this time yet. probably open to the idea of neutrality as a gender at this time. if i'd known a word for it i probably would have claimed it and identified with it.

then i went to college and i think something inside me knew i was like planning to be gay in college? like i completely subconsciously was like waiting for it. i was still deeply nervous and afraid but i was around a lot of new people and it's socially acceptable / normal to like experiment and stuff in college. i started experimenting with expressing attraction to women when talking with friends, or using words for myself like butch or dyke. (i didn't really know what the words meant i just was trying them on). i was around a lot more people who were out. i started trying out flirting with girls. i probably thought of myself as bi around this time.

then sophomore year i ended up on in 'gender inclusive housing' - a floor of one door building where any people could be roommates regardless of gender. we called it the queer floor. my RA was trans, manyyy of my floormates were lgbtq. there were a handful of straight people of the floor but the majority were queer. it was dramatic but fun honestly and an incredible experience being surrounded by that, and all the people i met through these people. i definitely started identifying as nonbinary and neutrois and using they/them around this time. i think i used demigirl a little bit but didn't feel super strongly towards it. i met my now-wife in the spring. i don't recall using any super specific words for my orientation other than like queer. i didn't know for sure what my orientation was so i was just keepin it vague. i didn't even really know for sure my gender i just knew somethin was going on!

couple years went by and i met a lesbian friend i became close with and i became more comfortable claiming it as an identity, at the same time as being nonbinary. around that time i started this blog.

and more years have gone by and i still feel like lesbian and nonbinary are true. I feel more secure and confident in being able to be both not a woman or girl or aligned with it at all and also being a lesbian, as well as confident in being into some nonbinary people and still being a lesbian. i think the specifics of my gender labels would include: trans, nonbinary, transgender and transsexual, transmasc (i guess? i'm unsure how i feel about this label and its usefulness in general or its accuracy for me. i kinda feel like sure i guess it is technically correct), neutrois, androgyne, neutral. stuff along those lines.

21. What message would you give to your younger self? bro... i don't even know. "it doesn't have to be great or even good, it just needs to be done". "it's okay to be gay it's okay to say it, it isn't going to help you to try to hide it and you shouldn't expect yourself to keep that hidden away forever it will eat you up inside and you don't deserve that".

33. What about your LGBT identity do you feel proud of/ want to recognize/celebrate? I'm proud that I'm me! I'm proud to be a dyke. I'm proud to be nonbinary. I'm proud to be exactly who I am, whether it's popular or not, whether anyone else gets it or not. I'm proud to be one member of a vibrant and beautiful and messy family. 🌈

send asks / #ask farmer lesbian

#ask farmer lesbian #mod alfalfa #anonymous

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will80sbyers · 2 years

Text

Let's talk about Will's playlist... just for fun!

same as with Mike's playlist the songs are born from a different context than the show, so these don't have always a perfect correspondence with the things happening in it.

This is all only my own interpretation and it's just speculation about what I think these songs could mean... the playlists were created with Netflix before the release of s2 but I believe they already knew a lot about the storylines of the other seasons and did some foreshadowing

» Songs about surviving the Upside Down / Vecna and Will defeating him

Beat the devil's tattoo - Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

I thread the needle through

You beat the devil's tattoo

foreshadowing for the season two finale in which Will is using morse code to communicate with the others... kind of drumming on a hard surface with his fingers

I'm still standing - Elton John

You could never know what it's like

Your blood like winter freezes just like ice

And there's a cold lonely light that shines from you

You'll wind up like the wreck you hide behind that mask you use

And did you think this fool could never win?

Well, look at me, I'm a-coming back again

I got a taste of love in a simple way

And if you need to know

while I'm still standing you just fade away

Don't you know I'm still standing better than I ever did?

Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid

And I'm still standing after all this time

Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind

Afraid - The Neighbourhood

When I wake up, I'm afraid somebody else might end up being me

Keep on dreaming, don't stop breathing, fight those demons, sell your soul, not your whole self

Oh, if they see it when you're sleeping, make them leave it

And I can't even see if there's hope there anymore, so

You're too mean, I don't like you

Fuck you, anyway

You make me wanna scream at the top of my lungs It hurts but, I won't fight you

Will is talking about Vecna and him possessing his body

Hold on - Alabama Shakes

Bless my heart, bless my soul.

Didn't think I'd make it to 22 years old.

There must be someone up above sayin',

"Come on, Brittany, you got to come on up.

You got to hold on

Every breath you take - The Police

Every breath you take

Every move you make

Every bond you break

Every step you take

I'll be watching you.

Vecna is watching Will in s2 ready to take over and use him for his plans

Under Cover of Darkness - The Strokes

I'll wait for you

Will you wait for me too?

And they sacrifice their lives

And they're lying about those odds

This song makes me think about a battle

Upside Down & Inside out - OK Go

Inside down and upside out and you can feel it

Don't stop, can't stop, it's like an airplane going down

I wish I had said the things you thought that I had said

Gravity's just a habit that you're pretty sure you can break

So when you met the new you

Were you scared, were you cold, were you kind?

Yeah when you met the new you, did someone die inside?

foreshadowing Will being possessed by the Mindflayer

Sympathy for the devil - Rolling stones

Pleased to meet you

Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah

But what's confusing you

Is just the nature of my game

Just as every cop is a criminal

And all the sinners saints

As heads is tails

Just call me Lucifer

'Cause I'm in need of some restraint

At this point I think this partly Vecna's playlist too... no, seriously 💀

Stayin alive - Bee gees

You're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

Feel the city breakin' and everybody shakin'

And we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive

Icky Thump - The White Stripes

Icky thump, handcuffed to a bunk

Robbed blind

Looked around

And there was nobody else

I won't back down - Tom Petty

Well, I won't back down

No I won't back down

You could stand me up at the gates of Hell

But I won't back down

No I'll stand my ground

Won't be turned around

And I'll keep this world from draggin' me down

Slug song - The Clean

I said don't

Don't ever change

And misarrange your mind

Run for cover - The Killers

Run for cover

Run while you can, baby, don't look back

You gotta run for cover

Don't be afraid of the fear, that's a played out trap, man

You know you're not the only one

And don't look back, just run for cover

Will hiding from the Mindflayer

Out of breath - Frank Turner

When you meet death

Be out of breath

And say you're pleased to see him

In fact you're waiting for this meeting

And well frankly his timekeeping leaves a lot to be desired

So tell that hooded huckster that he's fired

Cold Cold Cold - Cage the Elephant

Doctor, look into my eyes

I've been breathing air, but there's no sign of life

Doctor, the problem's in my chest

My heart feels cold as ice, but it's anybody's guess

Doctor, can you help me? 'Cause I don't feel right

Better make it fast before I change my mind

Doctor, can you help me? 'Cause I don't feel right

Better make it fast before I change my mind

Another one bites the dust - Queen

There are plenty of ways that you can hurt a man

And bring him to the ground

You can beat him, you can cheat him

You can treat him bad and leave him when he's down, yeah

But I'm ready, yes, I'm ready for you

I'm standing on my own two feet

Drawing board - George Erza

The meaning of this song is about someone trying to kill someone else so I think it fits better as a Vecna song than a love one lmao

Carry on my wayward son - Kansas

Carry on my wayward son

There'll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Don't you cry no more

Ziggy Stardust - David Bowie

this song is about a narcissistic guy that was in the band and was "special" until he ruined himself because of his big ego... I think it could fit with Vecna and if they knew about Henry since the start they knew that the Mindflayer was a narcissistic serial killer type

Come a little closer - Cage the elephant

Time shakes, found you at the water

At first you were my father

Now I love you like a brother

Earthquakes shake the dust behind you

This world, at times will blind you

Still, I know I'll see you there

Come a little closer, then you'll see

Things aren't always what they seem to be

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper - Blue Öyster Cult

This song is about accepting that death is natural and welcoming it, it makes me think about the fact that Will was ready to sacrifice himself and wanted to close the gate in season two

Blinded by the Light - Manfred Mann's Earth Band

» Songs about Will feeling different / not conforming

Walk on the wild side - Lou Reed

Holly came from Miami, F.L.A.

Hitch-hiked her way across the U.S.A.

Plucked her eyebrows on the way

Shaved her legs and then he was a she

She says, "Hey, babe,

Take a walk on the wild side."

Radio, Radio - Elvis Costello & The Attractions

I wanna bite the hand that feeds me.

I wanna bite that hand so badly.

I want to make them wish they'd never seen me.

Afraid of everyone - The National

I'm afraid of everyone, I'm afraid of everyone

Lay the young blue bodies with the old red bodies

I'm afraid of everyone, I'm afraid of everyone

With my kid on my shoulders I try

Not to hurt anybody I like

My generation - The Who

People try to put us down

Just because we get around

Things they do look awful cold

Yeah, I hope I die before I get old

Don't stop believin' - Journey

Strangers waiting

Up and down the boulevard

Their shadows searching in the night

Streetlights people

Livin' just to find emotion

Hidin' somewhere in the night

Don't stop believin'

Hold on to that feelin'

Another brick in the wall - Pink Floyd

We don't need no education

We don't need no thought control

Creature comfort - Arcade Fire

Some boys hate themselves

Spend their lives resenting their fathers

...

We're the bones under your feet

The white lie of American prosperity

We wanna dance but we can't feel the beat

I'm a liar, don't doubt my sincerity

Just make it painless

Free Fallin - Tom Petty

Now all the vampires walkin' through the valley

Move west down Ventura boulevard

And all the bad boys are standing in the shadows

And the good girls are home with broken hearts

Now I'm free

Breathe (in the air) - Pink Floyd

Breathe, breathe in the air

Don't be afraid to care

Leave but don't leave me

Look around and choose your own ground

» Songs about Will being in love with Mike:

Should I stay or should I go? - The Clash

Darlin' you got to let me know

Should I stay or should I go?

If you say that you are mine

I'll be here 'til the end of time

So you got to let me know

Should I stay or should I go?

I can't hear you - The Dead Weather

I'm gonna teach you

And keep you for myself

I'm gonna take you by the hand

I'm gonna walk you to my house

So I can hear you

Stuck in the middle with you - Stealers Wheel

Yes, I'm stuck in the middle with you

And I'm wondering what it is I should do

It's so hard to keep this smile from my face

Losing control, yeah, I'm all over the place

Don’t you forget about me - Simple Minds

Tell me your troubles and doubts

Giving everything inside and out and

Love's strange, so real in the dark

Think of the tender things that we were working on

Slow change may pull us apart

When the light gets into your heart, baby

Don't you, forget about me

Searching the blue - The Arcs

War is over now

I feel my mind returning

Carried on a cloud

Every nerve was burning over you

I never had a need at all for anyone

Anyone other than you

But now that's through

Sold fool

We're prayin' to get it fast

And we pray it's in the past

Is anything we do, ever gonna last?

Couldn't I have a clue?

Searchin' the blue

Under pressure - Queen & David Bowie

It's the terror of knowing

What this world is about

Watching some good friends screaming

"Let me out!"

Tomorrow gets me higher, higher, high!

Pressure on people, people on streets

Turned away from it all like a blind man

Sat on a fence, but it don't work

Keep coming up with love, but it's so slashed and torn

Why, why, why!?

Love, love, love, love, love

Insanity laughs under pressure

We're breaking

Can't we give ourselves one more chance?

Why can't we give love that one more chance?

Livin' on a prayer - Bon Jovi

We've gotta hold on to what we've got

It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not

We've got each other and that's a lot

For love we'll give it a shot

Start me up - The Rolling Stones

If you start me up

If you start me up I'll never stop

This song continues in a series of sexual innuendos so I guess it could be about puberty in the context of the show

Dark Days - Local Natives

Dark days in the summer

In the rain the water's fine

It was wild combination

Either that or right down the line

Foreshadowing the season 3 fight?

Howlin for you - The Black Keys

I must admit

I can't explain

Any of these thoughts racing

Through my brain

It's true

Baby I'm howlin' for you

Echo home - The Kills

And it's a long long long long drop

From the rocks to the pearls, we got so lost

We got so lost, we got so lost

For so long, for so long, so long

For so long, oh

Maybe you went out of your mind

You can lose it all if you wanna

Maybe you went out of mine

It's been so long

You can live your own dear life

And you can lose it all if you wanna

But I can't let you out of mine

It's Up To You Now - The Black keys

You wanted to love, but you didn't know how

That's okay, it's up to you now

It got so bad to where I wouldn't allow

But no more, it's up to you now

Let you go so you could go...

Go to town

It's up to you now

This song is about a divorce, the singer let go of his former lover that changed for the worst and lost their friends after the divorce... makes me think about s3 Mike

How you like me now - The Heavy

Now there was a time

When you loved me so

I couldn't do wrong

...

Remember the time when I eat you up

Yeah I was a lie that you can't give up.

If I was to cheat

Oh no, would you see right through me?

If I sing a sad sad sad sad song

Would you give it to me? Would you?

So how you like me now?

Does that make you love me baby?

Will Byers in his petty era... Mike WAKE THE FUCK UP

Blue veins - The raconteurs

And I know you won't deceive me

Like the rest

and there's nothing you need to explain

You always were the first one to believe me

When I said to you girl, I think it's gonna rain

But I could be wrong

Yeah, but all of these things

All these things

They're all truly nice but ain't nothing

Ain't nothing compared to the love

That's running through your little blue veins

Gooey - Glass animals

Heroes - David Bowie

Breakdown - Tom Petty

It's alright if you love me

It's alright if you don't

I'm not afraid of you running away

Honey, I get the feeling, you won't

There is no sense in pretending

Your eyes give you away

Something inside you is feeling like I do

We've said all there is to say

Just What I Needed - The Cars

I don't mind you comin' here

And wastin' all my time

'Cause when you're standin' oh so near

I kinda lose my mind

#byler #will byers #mike wheeler #Will's playlist

36 notes · View notes

gayleviticus · 2 years

Text

Better to Serve in Hell than Rule in Heaven

Kyubey: I don't believe it. Your tainted Soul Gem should have disappeared with your soul, but it hasn't! Why? Homura: Because I remembered why I repeated time and suffered over and over again; my feelings for Madoka, they run so deep that even pain has become precious to me. And as for my Soul Gem? A curse isn't what's tainted it. Kyubey: Then what is? Homura: Something you can't understand, Incubator. It is the pinnacle of all human emotion. More passion than hope, much deeper than despair. Love! - Rebellion

I rewatched Rebellion today for the first time in about 5 years and was really struck by just how juicy Homura’s character is in the film – her selfish selflessness, her turning the whole way of the world upside down even as she perpetuates it. She’s heartbroken and guilty over leaving Madoka to sacrifice for the good of the world, so her solution here is to make herself the sacrifice instead.

If Madoka was to be a goddess, Homura’s fate is to stand against her and become the Devil. And so, she creates a paradise where no more magical girls have to suffer or become Witches or die, and where Madoka and her friends can live in peace. What’s so bad about that? The Incubators suffer, but they had it coming. Homura suffers, but it’s a sacrifice she’s willing to make.

But in the end, have things really changed? A magical girl becomes a godlike being and rewrites the entire universe to bring about her ideal happy ending, sacrificing her normal existence in the process. Madoka didn’t quite break the cycle, but rather softened it; magical girls still commit themselves to lives of endless fighting, but instead of rotting into Witches they instead find peace in Madoka’s arms when time runs out. Homura, in turn, smashes the cycle entirely, placing the burden of the world’s salvation on the Incubators’ backs… but at the cost of her own happiness.

In a sense, her Rebellion changes everything, but the logic of sacrifice endures. But perhaps this Rebellion against the world is a necessary step. For all the struggle and sacrifice, all Madoka could do was cheat a cold, cruel, impersonal cycle last-minute. But what Homura does is prove that love is stronger than such systems. And yes, it’s a twisted, flawed, unsustainable love, built on trapping Madoka in a pretty little cage as Homura tears herself apart from the inside. But it’s love nonetheless, triumphing over rigid laws and the cruelty of fate.

I’ve seen some complaints that Rebellion mischaracterises Homura – she would never do something as evil as rip Madoka out of heaven. But isn’t this basically the logical extreme of her entire raison d’etre throughout the series? Homura rewinds time again and again and again to prevent Madoka making a wish and becoming a magical girl, no matter what Madoka thinks. She takes it upon herself to become Madoka’s protector, and the painful truth is that the greater this love grows, the further she becomes from Madoka in truth.

So when Madoka decides on her final wish, Homura is terrified.

Madoka: I finally figured it out what I wanna wish for. I know what I want now more than anything else. And I'm ready to trade my life for it with no regrets. Homura: But you can't! If you do then, everything I've fought for, it's all for nothing! Episode 12: ‘My Very Best Friend’

Is it really such a surprise to think that the Homura who spent endless cycles fighting to spare Madoka from the pain of becoming a magical girl would hesitate to do the same to spare her from the pain of becoming a goddess?

At first, Homura tells herself that it’s OK. This is what Madoka wanted. But then when in Rebellion she tells Madoka about the terrifying ‘dream’ she had, where Madoka went far far away, never to be seen again, forgotten by everyone except Homura…

Homura: I was so lonely and sad... But no one understood how I felt. I started to think all my memories of you were just things I'd made up... I thought I was going crazy... Madoka: You're right... That dream does sound awful. But it's okay now, really! I'm not going anywhere, especially if it's so far away I couldn't see you again. I'd never do something like that. Rebellion

Everything falls apart. The sole consolation Homura had clung to – that Madoka was happy, that the sacrifice was worth it – comes undone. Madoka would never do something like that. How could Homura let her best friend throw her life away like that?

Madoka has no idea, of course – she has no idea how brave she’s capable of being, how much courage she has to spare for the sake of the world. But for Homura, this is where she realises that she’s made an incredibly stupid mistake.

For Homura, anything that causes Madoka pain is automatically her enemy. And when she realises how much pain becoming the Law of Cycles caused her – well, the logical conclusion is that the greatest threat to Madoka’s wellbeing is Madoka herself.

Homura: Well then, I suppose one day, you'll also be my enemy. It's fine, I don't care. I'll keep wishing for a world where you can be happy. Rebellion

So Homura selfishly chooses to override Madoka’s wish, out of pure, selfless love. Out of love for Madoka, she turns herself into the Devil, a suitable foe to fight a Goddess. Out of love for Madoka, she has imprisoned the girl within a prison of illusions. Out of love for Madoka, she has essentially renounced Madoka’s love.

There’s something utterly selfless about this. Homura is willing to make Madoka – her little pet bird singing sweetly in a silver garden – her enemy. She puts Madoka’s welfare first and foremost, even if it means someday Madoka might reject her, or fight her, or perhaps even hate her. In order to prove her love for Madoka, Homura is happy to never be loved by Madoka in return. Without hope, without witness, without reward, she takes the burden from her shoulders. Better to serve in Hell than rule in Heaven.

But there’s something undeniably selfish here. Who cares what Madoka wants? Madoka comes all the way to save her from her self-inflicted hell within the Soul Gem, and yet Homura refuses because she knows best. Madoka’s job is sing sweetly by the window, never leaving, trapped within a never-ending beginning, with the door to adulthood firmly closed. Madoka is not really a human, a girl, a friend – she’s an idol, to be cherished and protected by any means necessary.

If witches are born of the selfish wishes of magical girls (such as Sayaka’s wish done in hope of having Kyousuke fall in love with her), and goddess born of pure and selfless wishes, then it’s no surprise that Homura’s selflessly selfish love would create the Devil herself.

#i never write long posts but i had a half-decent one from years ago i wanted to edit #not that this is a deep novel insight tho i just think homura's neat #pmmm #madoka magica #madoka meta #homura akemi #homura #puella magi madoka magica #pmmm rebellion

22 notes · View notes

bteezxyewriter12 · 2 years

Text

Name/ 2

Pairing- Tae x Named Reader

Word count- 5.4k

Includes- oral, blow job, face riding, cock riding, missionary, multiple orgasms, love making, fluff

Prompt Series Masterlist

Part 1

Tae POV

The New York subway is.... interesting

So far, there have been people asking for money and a group of people dancing and performing in the train car

Joanne told me not to look because they'll expect me to give them money

I kept switching my gaze between her and the performers

It's crazy that they do this in the subway

Once it was done, they did ask for money

Some people gave them some but most didn't

I don't care about giving them money but Joanne told me not to

I don't know how things are done here so I'm going to listen to her

After awhile, the train stops and everyone gets off

"Uh"

"It's the last stop baby", she says, taking my hand and leading me out of the train

I fucking love when she calls me baby

I never thought anyone would call me that because I didn't know I'd ever find her

I didn't mean to call her aegi before

It just completely slipped out and I freaked out worrying she'd say something

I always wanted to call my soulmate that and I'm so glad she likes the nickname

"Ok aegi. We go your apartment now?", I ask

"Yeah. We're going to my car and I'm gonna drive home"

I nod

I know she has a car

She told me she drives to the train station, parks her car, then takes the train

It's a lot just go get to work

I don't know if I could ever do that every single day

We get to her car, get in and she starts driving

----------------------------------------------------

"So this is my apartment", she says

She showed me all of her apartment and we're back in her living room, sitting on the couch

"I like it", I answer

"Yeah? It's probably kinda smaller than you're use to"

"Oh no. It's great. I share with seven people. You get all space by yourself"

She smiles at me, "Yeah but sometimes it gets lonely. You have the rest of the members with you if you need to be around someone"

She's not wrong

I do have my own room when I want to be alone and I can go into the living room when I want to be around people

Everyone is always there

"What about you family?"

"Oh uh yeah I don't talk to them. I don't have any brothers or sisters. Just my parents and they're not nice people"

That upsets me

I can't imagine being without my family

They're one of the most important things in my life

But she had no one for so long

"You have me now", I answer

Her smile widens, "Yeah I do. And you have me"

God I love hearing that

I do have her

And I'm never letting her go

Moving closer to her, I crash my lips to hers

She throws her arms around my neck, pulling me closer

I can't stop kissing her

It's like after the first one, I just can't stop

And I love the feeling I get from her kisses

I pull her on my lap and she comes, still kissing me

Her hands go in my hair and it feels good

I cautiously run my hands up and down her body

I want to do more but I don't know if she wants to

If it's too soon

Keeping my hands by the hem of her shirt, I play with it, lifting it a little but not too much

She moves her hands from my hair to my shirt and she pulls it up and off

Leaning back, her mouth drops open as she looks at me

"Fuck Tae, you're perfect"

The look on her face tells me she's telling the truth

I'm so happy she thinks that about me

I don't have abs like Jungkook or Jimin

I actually have a little tummy and I was self conscious about it around her

She touches my chest and runs her hands all over me

I close my eyes against her touch and just enjoy it

Her hands are soft and warm against my skin

She slides her hands up my chest, up my neck, touching my face as she leans to me and kisses me softly

When she pulls away, I open my eyes and just tell her, "I want you. So much"

She smirks, "Yeah baby?"

I nod rapidly

She kisses my cheek, then whispers, "Well you're in luck baby because I want you so much too"

"Yeah?", I ask

She nods, "Don't stop"

I pull her to me in a kiss, sliding my hands up her shirt and finally touching her skin

Fuck, she's so soft and smooth, I absolutely love it

Pulling her shirt up, I take it off and throw it somewhere, her lips back on mine in a second

I unclasp her bra taking it off as well

Touching her breasts, I moan against her lips

Kissing down her neck, she leans back as I get to her breasts, holding them up

Putting her nipple in my mouth I suck on it, feeling it get hard right instant

And her nipple isn't the only thing that gets hard

She moans, gripping my upper arms tightly

Going to the other nipple, I lick it over and over, it getting hard against my tongue

Fuck I'm so turned on

When I move back, she stands up, grabs my hand and pulls me with her

I follow her and we go in her room

She leads me to her bed and she sits on it, moving me in front of her

Her hands move fast on my jeans getting them undone and pulling them and my boxers down right away

I watch her lick up and down my hard cock, pleasure slamming my body

"Fuck", I whisper

She takes me in her mouth, sucking right away

"Oh my god!", I yell

I can't, it feels so good

And watching her turns me on so much more

I feel her tongue licking me all over as she sucks harder

"Baby oh god", I moan

She sucks on my head while jerking me off

I don't know which feels better, all I know is that I'm in so much pleasure

She takes her hand away and moves down my cock more, putting all of me inside

When she starts sucking, I can't take it

"Joanne oh fuck, baby, baby!", I shout, coming

I feel her swallow on my cock over and over making the pleasure last longer

"Mmmm", she groans, "So good"

My mouth drops open

"Ggg..good?", I stammer

She moves off me, looking up and smiling, "Yeah Tae. Good. You taste good"

Jesus Christ, I can't wrap my head around that

Instead of thinking about it, I gently push her back on the bed and pull off her pants and panties slowly

I take a second to look at her naked body

Oh my god, I can't fucking breathe

She's fucking so beautiful, so hot, so perfect

Running my hands up her body, I lean over her, kissing her again

I love how her arms immediately to around my neck, holding me close to her

Getting on the bed, I lay on my back and pull her to me

"Up", I tell her, moving her on top of me until she's right over my mouth

I can't wait to eat her out

Pulling her down more, I lift my head up and lick her

"Ttt... Tae", she whimpers

I keep going, licking all over, just feeling her on my tongue

And she feels good

She's already so wet and it tastes good

I move my hands on her ass and squeeze

"Mmmm", she moans

Stopping for a second, I look at her pretty pussy, her clit throbbing hard

I want it in my mouth so badly, so I wrap my lips around it and start sucking hard and fast

"Oh my god Tae!", she screams

I can't help but smile at her scream

I'm so glad I can make her feel so good

Still sucking on her, she moans, grabbing my arms tightly

"TAEHYUNG!", she screams, coming and shaking above me

I lick her cum and I'm so surprised at how good she tastes

I've went down on girls before but I never really liked the way they taste

But her....I love it

And I know I'm always going to want it

When she finishes I keep licking her to get her to cum again

I swipe my tongue on her over and over, feeling her get more wet

After another minute, she yells my name as she orgasms again and I lick up all her cum

Grabbing her hips, I move her down my body until she's right over my cock

"Please aegi", I beg

She bites her lip, nodding at me

Pushing her down on me, my cock gets so wet and warm from her

"Oh shit", I moan as pleasure slams right into me

"Are you ok?", she asks worriedly

I nod rapidly, "You just....fuck...so tight....feel so good"

Jesus I just went in and I already can't talk

"You...you like it?", she asks

"I love it", I gasp

She leans over me, kissing my lips softly

God her kisses are everything

I bury my hands in her hair, sliding my tongue in her mouth

Hers touches mine, sending chills down my spine

I feel her hands slide in my hair and touch my face

Goddamnit I love her so much

She moves back and smiles at me, giving me a quick kiss

Then she sits up and starts moving up and down my cock slowly

"Oh god", I moan

The pleasure is so intense and I've never felt this good before

Moving quicker, she bounces on me and takes my hands, putting them on her body

"Touch me Tae"

Hell yes

My hands slide up and down her body touching her every where I can

"You're hands feel so good baby", she whimpers

God she's everything

And she loves me

That's the best part

She loves just me

She just wants me

I'm so fucking happy

"Tae", she moans

She's going to cum

I can feel her

And I've never been more excited for a girl to cum on me

"Tae"

She's right there, so I thrust up into her

"Oh fuck", she cries

"Come on baby", I whisper, moving up into her again

"Taehyung oh fuck", she cries, getting so tight on me as she orgasms

Pure fucking pleasure washes over me as she cums on me

Oh my god, it feels amazing

But I knew it would

I knew being with her would be the best

I had no doubt

The pleasure on her face makes me happy and makes me want to give her more

Holding her hips, I thrust into her while she orgasms, making her scream louder

"Baby-"

"It's ok aegi. Again"

She starts moving slamming down as I thrust up

I hit inside so much deeper and I love the feeling, the fast pulsing her cunt is doing around me

"There Tae. Oh shit right there", she moans

I slam up and she shouts

"There?", I ask

"Yes!"

She likes it there, in that spot and I'm going to give it to her

I move faster, making sure I slam into where she wants

"Fuck!", she cries, orgasming again and holding onto my cock so tightly

"Fuck", I gasp from the pleasure

She shakes on top of me so I just hold her until she finishes

I sit up, holding her to me and rolling her over so she's under me

Kissing her lips hard, I push back inside and start moving slowly

Her hand are on my hips and she slides them up my back slowly, touching everywhere and her fingers leaving fire all along my back

I shiver from her touch and I feel her smile against my lips

I pull away from her, touching her face softly

"I love you"

🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯

J POV

Looking up at Tae, he tells me, "I love you"

Happiness explodes in my heart

I can never stop hearing him say that

"I love you", I tell him

The smile he gives me is so stunning, it takes my breath away

I'm so lucky I have him

I'm extremely lucky I found him

I would never have expected my soulmate to be famous

And everything that led to me finding him was pure luck

I know this

But I'm glad luck was on my side

He kisses me again, still moving slowly

I can feel every move, every thrust, every touch and I absolutely love it

Tae kisses down my neck, whispering to me as he does

"My baby."

He kisses another spot on my neck

"My Joanne"

Another kiss

"Aegi"

I can't, he's everything

"My Tae", I whisper to him

He looks at me and smiles before pressing his lips to mine

He moves a little bit harder and it feels so good

He's getting me right there, just a few more thrusts

"Tttt.....Tae baby", I whimper

"Yeah aegi", he answers, kissing me more

He thrusts again and I snap, pleasure washing over me as I orgasm

"Oh god Tae!", I moan, clinging onto him, my body pressing into his

"Joanne, oh fuck, aegi", he groans, coming inside

I feel his cock move and throb as he cums, feeling so fucking pleasurable that it gives me another orgasm

"Fuck Tae!", I cry, shaking in his arms

"Jo, oh, so good", he moans, burying his face in my neck

Wrapping my arms around him, I keep him on top of me, running my fingers up and down his back and playing with his hair

Turning my head, I kiss the side of his face and his shoulder

"I love you", I tell him and keep kissing him

He lifts his head, looking at me

"Marry me"

I blink in shock

What?

Which is what I say

"What?"

He kisses me, then gets up and leans over the bed to the floor

What is he doing?

Did he really just ask me to marry him?

Is he being serious

He comes back, laying down next to me and I move so we're facing each other

He holds up a ring to me

Oh my god he's serious

"I love you. You are mine. I am yours. I don't want wait anymore. I come and know if you my soulmate, I want marry you. And you are. I don't want be without you", he says softly, moving hair from my face

"Marry me?", he asks again

"Yes", I answer with no hesitation

"Yes?"

"Yes", I confirm, nodding, "I love you Tae. I don't want to be without you either"

I don't

I already loved him before I met him today

And the love I feel for him now that he's my soulmate is so much more than before

I don't want to be away from him

It's going to kill me when he has to leave tonight to go back to the hotel

And he has a whole tour to go on

But I want to marry him

He's my everything

🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯

Tae POV

She said yes

I'm going to marry my soulmate

I'm so elated

I came here knowing I was going to propose to her if she was my soulmate

I didn't want to be apart from her if she was

And she is

I don't care about being too young or being famous for marriage

I'm ready as long as it's her

I was scared to ask, worrying about when the right time would be

But it came so easily

I just asked

And she agreed

I kiss her softly, just feeling her lips on mine

It feels so good

She puts her hand on the side of my face and I love it

I love when she touches me

Her hands are so soft against my skin

When we pull away, I take her hand and slide the ring on it

She looks at it, smiling so widely

"Do you like it?", I ask

She nods, "I love it. It's beautiful Tae. Thank you"

There's more I want to ask her but this I'm scared about

But I have to

"Uh Jo. Can we uh talk?", I ask

She lifts her gaze from the ring to me

"Sure Tae"

"Uh Jo, I want ask if you uh come with me. To Korea?"

I hate my English

I sound like a toddler

I'm better than before, I can have a conversation with her but it's still hard to think of all the words and put them in a sentence right away

It takes me a few seconds

And sometimes it's just broken sentences

"You want me to move to Korea? Don't you live in the dorm with the members?", she asks

"Uh yes but if you come, I move. I live with you"

"And you want to get married in Korea too?"

That I don't care about

We can get married here or there

Wherever she wants

"Whatever you want Jo. That does not matter. But I have uh stay in Korea. Because BTS is there. If I not in BTS, I move here with you. But I cannot now. Maybe later but not now"

"I get it Tae. I know you can't leave Korea", she answers

I'm worried she's not going to come

I know I'm asking a lot in a short period of time

She takes my hand, lacing our fingers and kisses the back of mine

"I'll go with you to Korea Tae."

"Yes? You will?"

"Of course Tae. I love you and we're going to get married. I'm not going to stay here when you're in Korea. Wherever you go, I go", she says softly

I can't hold the smile that bursts on my face

"Thank you aegi", I thank her

"There's nothing to thank Tae. I'd do anything for you"

"Me too. I do anything for you", I repeat

"Uh I guess this is happening after your tour?"

"Yes we move after tour. I come help you", I confirm

She's moving for me, the least I could do is help her pack and ship everything

She nods, "I'm going to miss you when you're on tour"

I've thought about that too

I knew if she was my soulmate, I wouldn't want to be away from her so quickly

"You uh can come with me", I say lowly

Surprise falls on her face, "I can?"

I nod, "Yes. Before I leave Korea, I tell manager um about..you. I tell them you maybe come with me. I tell members same. They ok. Manager no ok but I don't care."

"Oh, Tae I don't want to get you in trouble if your managers said no"

I'm not explaining this right

I take a few seconds to think

"Uh they no say no. They say not good idea. But not say no. And anyway, I don't care. You come. Please?"

I hope she understands

"Oh, uh but my job Tae."

Oh right

I forgot

She may not be able to get off

"I forgot", I answer

Then I get an idea

"Uh Jo. When you move to Korea, you quit job here, yes?"

She nods

"So uh, you quit now and come with me", I suggest

"I mean I guess I could but I kinda need to make money Tae. I'm going to have to spend a lot of money to ship my stuff to Korea."

I shake my head, "No think about money. I have money. I pay everything"

"What?", she exclaims, "No way Tae. No"

"Yes", I insist, "I don't care, I pay for you. I take care of you. I want you to come with me. You don't need job."

"Tae-"

"Jo, only for little time. When we go to Korea, you find job if you want. If you don't want work, it's ok. I pay"

She hesitates

"Please aegi", I beg

I want her with me

I'll be able to relax on the tour if she's there instead of thinking and worrying about her

I'll perform better if I know she's backstage, watching and waiting for me

And I tell her this in my broken English

Her face softens and she answers, "Yeah Tae ok fine. But, you do not spend a lot of money on me. And I will get a job in Korea. I'm not a moocher"

Moocher?

What's that?

"What is moocher?", I ask

"It's a person who just takes people's money, spends it and doesn't work or do anything to help the person who's giving them money"

There is no way I'd ever think she's like that

I know she's not

I know she loves her job and I know she doesn't like just taking things from people

"I know you no like that aegi. Don't worry."

She just nods

"So you come?"

"Yes Tae, I'll come"

Relief floods my body and I pull her to me, her lips on mine

God I love having her in my arms

I love kissing her

I love her

"Time to sleep baby?", I ask

"Yeah Tae if you're sleepy"

"I am", I nod

"You don't have to go back to the hotel?"

I shake my head

"No, I stay with you. We pack you suitcase in morning and go to hotel. I have show tomorrow"

"Ok baby. Whatever you want"

"You, I want you"

"You have me Tae. Always"

She kisses me again, then lays in my arms, holding me tightly

Playing with her hair, I put my baby to sleep, then I close my eyes

🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯

J POV

"C'mon aegi", Tae says, pulling me behind him, "Don't be uh...nervous"

Of course I'm nervous

I'm meeting his group members

We had to wake up early today because he has to go to sound check and practice for the concert tonight

He asked me to come with him

While I agreed, I'm still nervous

I'm meeting the people who have been his family for the last seven years

What if they think I'm not good enough?

Tae leads me backstage into a room

There's six guys sitting around on their cell phones

Tae starts talking in Korean, making the guys look up

I hear my name in there somewhere

"Hi Joanne", one says to me in English

That has to be Namjoon

It doesn't sound like he has an accent when he talks

Tae introduces me to each guy, telling me their real name and stage name

Tae brings me to a couch where we sit down and I end up sitting next to Jimin on one side

He smiles at me, "You love him?"

I nod and I feel Tae put his arm around my waist

"Yeah a lot"

"Nice but he pain in ass", Jimin jokes

I burst out laughing as Tae says, "Hey!"

"Yes big pain and very silly", Jungkook adds

Tae glares at him

"It's ok. I'm a pain in the ass too"

I glance at Tae, smiling and a huge smile bursts on his face

"And anyway he's not a pain."

"Thanks aegi"

"Aegi? Oh boy he's whipped", Namjoon laughs

"Shush!", Tae growls making me giggle

"It's ok baby", I tell him and kiss his cheek

We stay in the room for awhile while the guys hang out and eat

"Here aegi", Tae says, handing me a breakfast sandwich and some juice

"Oh no baby, that's for you guys"

"No Jo, eat it. It's for whoever wants it", Namjoon tells me

"Eat. It's fine", Hoseok says

Tae smiles at me encouragingly

I take the food from him

"Thank you", I say to all of them

Most of them nod, some smile

As I eat Tae is constantly giving me little kisses, little touches and I fucking love it

When we're done eating, Tae tells me that they have to rehearse

"You come baby"

"But your fans"

He shakes his head, "Not yet aegi. They come for soundcheck later. Now just us and staff. You can come. Please"

I nod

I want to go with him, see what he does

He takes my hand and leads me down a hallway

The guys are staring out a window and Tae brings me to it

I look outside to see a huge line of people waiting outside

"Is that ARMYS?", I gasp

Tae nods

There are so many people just waiting for them

It's 10 a.m.

The concert is at 6

These people are going to be here all day

Just for them

That's amazing

"Wow that's incredible. They love you guys so much"

"Yes. We love them too", Yoongi says

"If not for them, we wouldn't be here", Namjoon replies

I can get that

I think it's so sweet how much they love their ARMYS and everything they do is for them

"Come aegi", Tae says, leading me outside to the stage

Tae is handed a green mic and some ear things that he puts in

He takes my hand again and leads me on to the big stage

Music starts and the guys start rapping and singing

Tae leads me down the catwalk while he sings

His voice is so fucking amazing

Both his speaking voice and singing voice is so deep and it turns me on

I move away and watch him during certain songs when they have to dance their choreography

Tae moves gracefully and he's fucking sexy as hell

He's always licking his lips, biting his lip, smirking, acting sexy

And it turns me on so much

When they finish, Tae comes over to me

"Come Jo. Last song. Then we relax then soundcheck"

"Ok Tae", I answer, taking his hand

We walk to the middle of the stage and he pulls me close to him

He kisses my forehead while the other guys are rapping and singing their part

He smiles at me, then when his part comes, he moves his arm around my shoulder and starts singing

I put my arms around him, looking up at this beautiful man that's mine

When he finishes singing, he smiles down at me, kissing me softly

My heart pounds harder with absolute love I have for him

After the kiss, I hug him, putting my head against his chest

He moves his arm around my waist, keeping me against him

When he sings, I can hear his voice reverberate in his chest

I smile and kiss his chest

I feel him kiss the top of my head when his part is over

When the song ends, he just hugs me while we stand on the stage

"I love you Jo. I'm so happy I found you"

I nod, "I love you Tae and I'm so happy too"

I look up at him and see him moving towards me

I meet him in the middle, our lips meeting in a kiss

----------------------------------------------------

~Three months later~

I step out of the plane and into the airport, Tae holding my hand as we walk

"Welcome to Korea", he smiles

I smile back

I'm excited to be here but I'm also so nervous

I don't know Korean that well

I've been practicing Korean more and I'm getting better by talking to Tae

While I can speak it a little, I still can't read it

So I have no idea what's around me, what the signs mean, what the stores are

Tae promises to help me and be with me but I also know he always has a packed schedule

I saw that from spending three months with him and BTS while they were on tour

Constant travelling, constant practicing and concerts

Tae was always tired and I did whatever I could to help him

I'd give him massages, lay with him, hold him, play with his hair

Whatever he wanted, I did

He of course wanted to have sex all the time and of course I wanted to too

I love him and he's sexy as fuck, no way I'm going to say no

And he wants me

He loves me

That still blows my mind

After the tour was over, he came back to New York with me and helped me pack up my apartment

Like he told me, he paid for everything- boxes, tape, shipping costs, even though I yelled at him for it

He'd just smile and kiss me

He's the sweetest thing ever

After everything was sent here, he got on a plane with me and here we are

"You ok aegi?", he asks

I nod, "Yeah Tae. I'm good"

"Ok. I call BigHit to get us and we go to our apartment"

"Our apartment", I repeat, smiling at him

He told me he got an apartment last year when the rest of the BTS members were buying apartments but he still lives in the dorm with them

But now that he has me, he wants to live with me

Tomorrow we're going to the dorm to start moving Tae's stuff too

The guys are really nice and they understand that Tae would want to move in with me

They're ok with it

I'm glad

Even though Tae is my soulmate, I don't want to get in the way of his friendships

But everything is going great

"Aegi! Car is outside"

He leads me out of the airport right into a car

--------------------------------------------------

"No way Tae!", I gasp as he opens the door to the apartment

The apartment is huge

Well what I've seen so far

Which is the huge living room

With the flat screen tv, game systems, couches and table

"What? Is no good?", he asks confused

I turn to him

"What? Are you kidding me? I love it", I exclaim, hugging him so tightly, "Thank you baby"

"No thank aegi. I love you. Everything is for you"

"I love you Tae"

Standing on my toes, I press my lips to his

He wraps his arms around me, kissing me back

"Come baby. I show you apartment"

Tae leads me around, showing me the large kitchen, dining room, and bathroom

There's five bedrooms- Tae said one is for me for my books, one is for his art studio he wants to set and the other is for a baby.

"Baby?", I ask laughing

"Uh yes. No now. Baby later. After marry. Few years", he answers, turning red

We're planning to have our wedding for next November and Tae is already thinking and planning things

He's already going all out

It's adorable

I'm glad I found someone who wants to get married and have kids

"Ok Tae. Babies later", I nod

"Babies?", he asks

I nod

I know he wants lot of kids

That's general info on BTS' V

I'm not opposed to it

I like kids and I always wanted my own

"Yeah Tae. Babies. We're having more than one right?"

"I...I want more but I don't know if you-"

"I do Tae. With you, I do"

The smile that bursts on his face is so beautiful

He takes my hand again and leads me into the last room

"Our room", he says

I move into the room looking around

There's a huge bed, dressers, tv, huge walk in closet and a door that leads to a huge bathroom

"Wow Tae"

"You like?", he asks

I look at him

"I love baby"

He comes over to me, pulling me into his arms

Laying my head on his chest, I just stand with him with ours arms around each other, in our room

"Are you tired? It late. You no sleep much on plane"

I didn't

I can't sleep on planes

It's so uncomfortable

"Yeah ok. Are you going to stay with me?"

I want him to but I'm not going to force him

"Of course. I always with you", he tells me

I kiss his cheek and then we both change

I get into the bed and wait for him to come

As soon as he gets in, he automatically comes closer to me, wrapping me up in his arms

Snuggling into each other, I give him a kiss and tell him, "I love you Tae"

"I love you Jo", he answers, kissing my forehead

I close my eyes, laying in Tae's arms

I'm happy I'm in Korea with him

It's a huge move but as long as I have him I'll be ok and we'll get through anything together

I finally found my soulmate and I get my happily every after with the best guy I could ask for

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gurhl · 6 months

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finally hope everyones ok and has had a good 10 years or whatever haha. i'm 27 now, life is really weird for that...? not that i think anyone is reading this or even cares LOL but i thought i'd let you know i'm still alive! i'm ok, life has been really weird (?) to me, i've been like 50 people since we last spoke. for better or worse. but i'm so happy that i'm still here and that i still just have so much hope in my heart. i live alone in a flat in newcastle that i own (like, what?) with my little cat called mary. i draw, i work for a website that some of you probably know, i love taylor swift so much. i am quite a lonely girl (not new) but i'm really truly ok with it (new) and i really just hope hard all the time and believe that good good things are coming, they're maybe even here already, i will let you know. i'm learning all the time, which is nice, it's one thing that never goes away. i gained loads of weight then dropped it then gained some of it back, LOL. its nice, i've got no hard edges. my hair grew really long, and it's back to being brunette. i haven't touched it like that in years. sure there's many tumblr girlies who went on a similar trajectory, bahahaha. but my passport still has the blue bob! i was just looking at it a few minutes ago, so funny. i remember an MC on my 18th birthday hyping me up on the decks at the club, and he was saying "give it up to the birthday girl in the blue wig!" at the time i was offended, how stupid is that! i'd love for my hair to look so gorgeous now that someone mistook it for a wig. right now its greasy and scraggly, i'm trying to follow a curly girl method and i love it but my biggest gripe is that my hair is always knotty without brushing it. beauty is pain! pain isn't beauty though, i learned that along the way. well, neither of those statements are true actually i was just being facetious. happiness is beauty, being stupid with your friends is beauty, falling asleep with a full tummy with the same sitcom you've seen 1000 times running in the background whilst someone you love has their hand in your hair is beauty. speaking of which, i'm watching doctor who from the beginning in time for the ncuti christmas special (OMG) so i have to go. good bye for now lovely people! bisous

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thehighpriestexx420 · 7 months

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For Trans Awareness Week: My experience/timeline of my gender & sexuality

(from straight cis girl, bisexual cis girl, pansexual trans man, to pansexual nonbinary transmasculine)

In middle school, when I was 11/12. I realized I was bisexual during this time and still thought I was a cis girl. Who just happened to be ok with the thought of getting a sex change if their crush turned out to be gay 🤷‍♂️

I realized I was bisexual (I had romantic experiences with girls before) when I thought a girl's eyes were pretty & developed somewhat of a crush. I printed out the bisexual flag and accidentally left a copy. My mom found it & questioned me. I casually told her that I was bisexual and was confused by her resistance and doubt to the idea. What was wrong with liking girls? I didn't see anything wrong with it.

She laid out alot of the cliches. "How do you know you like girls, are you sure?" ("I know I like them just like how I know I like guys", I told her 🙄) "It was just that Tila Tequila show that made you think that." "You're too young to know that."

When I was 14, I realized I was a trans guy! I came to the conclusion that girls didn't "want to be guys". Wanting to be a "guy" in my eyes meant being recognized by society as one, my interpersonal dynamics regarding me as one, & physically wanting a typical amab body (flat chest, deep voice, penis, etc.) I was in my early 20s in this picture.

I still liked feminine fashion and makeup. I figured I was like Jeffree Star in that aspect. But at that time I couldn't wear clothes that weren't masculine because I'd get mistaken for being a girl. Society and those around me trying to box me into this limiting expression and characterization of myself felt alienating, isolating, & lonely.

My dysphoria mostly came from other's perceptions of me - rather than what I would've thought about myself if society didn't put a gender label on every fucking thing. I would've still longed for the body parts I wanted but I don't think the depression and discomfort would've been half as bad.

Consequently, my body made me uncomfortable. I had the parts that people told me I had because I was a woman. There was a direct association.

The term "pansexual" started becoming more well-known and I vibed with the interpretation of "you're attracted to people regardless of gender/your attraction to people doesn't feel different based on gender" so I slapped that label on to me.

This is me at 28, just last year! I started giving fuck all (similar to the expression of my middle finger) to others' perceptions of me. If I like holographic clothes and fishnets with rhinestones, and you don't like that, well then I'm sorry I have better fashion sense than you 🤷‍♂️💅

I took testosterone for about 5 years at this point so the contrast of masculine & feminine features were like a bow on top of the gift that is me 😎

At this point, instead of just wanting the bumps in my tshirts to be gone regardless of any asthetic consequences (nipples not looking good due to the particular surgeon, etc.), I'd actually want to switch between having a flat chest and having boobies whenever I wanted to. Boobies are fun on me & others, what can I say.

& here's one of my most recent selfies! A couple years ago I came to the conclusion that above all else, I just feel like a person. If I had a gender I'd be a guy so I do still somewhat vibe with the sentiment. But I'm so much more than that. The label that currently fits me best is "gender non-conforming/ non-binary transmasculine". Regardless of whatever label someone may use, I welcome their attraction to me & validate it. If you're a lesbian and you happen to like my features while acknowledging that I'm not a woman & treating me as such, then your feelings are valid & don't invalidate my own identity.

My journey hasn't been easy for several reasons - not just due to my sexuality and gender. My mother & step dad didn't believe me when I came out as trans. Before I came out, and wanted to do things like get a shorter haircut, my mom would say things like "I won't have a dyke for a daughter." And then proceed to say "you know I didn't mean it like that."

One of the more overt instances of transphobia was when her bf randomly shouted "you're a girl!" to me.

A more covert form was when my mom & grandma would "compromise" on my name change. My birth name started with a "K" so I changed it to a more masc version also starting with a "K". They weren't used to my new name and my mom expressed feelings of resentment because she was the one who named me. So the "compromise" was just calling me "K"....a feminine ass sounding name. I asked them to stop and even stopped responding to the name. I eventually changed my name to "Colton" just so they didn't have an excuse to call me K anymore.

There were other instances of abuse and mental health emergencies that I won't go into detail about. I was recently asked what my proudest accomplishment was and I told them that it was not only making it this far but also being able to support myself. I've experienced homelessness so that adds on to what I've overcome.

But now, I'm at a place I couldn't fathom. Things aren't perfect but I have the tools, the want, the belief, and the will to make things better every day. I believe my life story is meant to serve as an example of hope. I've been destroyed & broke down to my atoms so I was forced to rebuild myself stronger and more in alignment with my true self. I have this wisdom to offer and I welcome requests for spiritual guidance.

The High Priestexx Tarot + Reiki Services is a buisness I've founded. It's success & ability to change people's lives for the better is also something I'm profoundly proud of. When you follow my blog & reblog my pinned post, you get a free one question tarot reading & free reiki healing session!

One way of celebrating Trans Awareness Week is by celebrating yourself with this free service & by celebrating me & my journey by increasing my visibility!

So that was my specific experience with my gender & sexuality! I hope that can broaden your mind as to what individual experiences can look like & help you feel less alone. Sending everyone much peace, love, & support! ✌️💖

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