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blog-name-idk · 9 months

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Business As Usual | 07

Banner by @bangtansmauyeondan <333

Pairing: businessSchool!Jin x Fem Reader

Genre: GradSchool!AU, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Humor, Smut

Summary: The first thing Jin noticed about you was that you were hot. The second was that you were fucking brilliant. The third was that you were kind of a bitch. Basically, you were perfect.

The first thing you noticed about Jin was that he was hot. The second was the professors already called him by name. The third was that he was an insufferable prick. Basically, you hated his guts.

Word Count: 2,460

Never had a simple door looked so imposing, so threatening. Especially since this one in particular was a familiar one you had grown up using. Then again, it wasn't the worn wood itself that was daunting, or even what lay on the other side.

~~~~~

AN: Brains are weird, man. After being writer's blocked for months on this chapter, I'm now writer's blocked on everything else but for some reason just had to poop this one out today lol. It's short and not super juicy but I hope you enjoy it anway 🥲

~~~~~

It was what - or rather who - was standing with you.

"Do we… knock?" asked Hoseok after a moment of waiting as you continued standing like a potato, rooted in place. Were you really doing this?

"Is she okay?" Jin whispered to his friend, who just shrugged. You shook yourself out of your stupor with a sigh of resignation and knocked on the apartment door. Footsteps sounded on the other side, and you braced yourself.

Well, this was it. These idiots were going to meet your mother. The first friends you had introduced to her in years. There was no going back now.

The door opened, and you did your best to ignore the ham-fisted metaphor for your current life circumstances.

"Hey mom," you replied with a smile, momentarily forgetting your companions at the sight of your mother. She did look much better, a far cry than her frail appearance when you had last seen her, and it went far toward soothing your worries. You swept her up in your arms, taking comfort in the familiar feeling. "Just want to make sure you're settling back in okay."

"Of course," she agreed, hugging you back just as fiercely. "And who are these handsome young men?"

You turned to see Hoseok grinning and Jin preening, and felt torn between the urge to laugh and the urge to groan. If only Namjoon had been able to come as well, you could have given your mother some more eye candy.

"Mom, these are Hoseok and Jin, they're good friends of mine."

You missed the way Jin's face brightened at your words, and the way Hoseok elbowed him to keep him from bouncing. Your mother did not.

"Guys, this is my mom."

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Ms. [L/n]!" chirped Hoseok, grinning at your mother brightly.

"Ah, Hoseok! [Y/n]'s told me so much about you!" your mother replied enthusiastically, eyes crinkling in delight as she finally put a face to the stories you had told her about your friend. "Thank you for looking after my daughter."

"She doesn't need much looking after," replied Hoseok with an easy laugh, moving forward to shake her hand. With the first introduction out of the way, she eyed Seokjin with clear curiosity.

"Jin… I don't believe I've heard your name before," she mused, head cocked as she sized the man up. He gulped and smiled nervously at her, back straighter than an ironing board as he stepped forward to shake her hand.

"It's short for Seokjin," he replied. He seemed uncharacteristically awkward, an odd look on someone you were used to seeing wrap people around his finger. "Kim Seokjin. It's a pleasure to meet you."

You watched your mother's eyes widen, and when they flickered over to you you felt your face burn. Oh, she recognized that name alright. And it was one she would never have expected you to be near voluntarily.

At your expression, her lips twitched in what looked suspiciously like amusement.

"Ah, the oaf?" she asked bluntly, making you choke and Hoseok snort. Seokjin winced, his ears turning pink.

"Yeah, that's probably me," he replied sheepishly, looking relieved when you shot him an apologetic smile. "I'm working on it."

"I can see that," your mother responded in a neutral tone, though her eyes were positively dancing. "Well, come in, all of you. Tea? Coffee?"

"Sorry," you whispered to Jin as the four of you squeezed through the hall on the way to the small living room. His reassuring grin was enough to soothe you.

"Is it sad that part of me is still happy you talked about me at all?" he whispered back, sending an obnoxious swarm of butterflies fluttering through your chest. Seokjin was way smoother when he wasn't trying, and it was unfortunately proving to be quite effective on you.

"[Y/n], stop flirting and come help me make tea," your mom ordered from the kitchen, making you trip over your feet and grab onto Seokjin's arm for balance. Before you promptly let go as if you had been burned.

"Mom!" you complained, feeling like you were a teenager again. Hoseok was cackling, comfortable on your mother's old loveseat like he belonged there, and Jin - well, you couldn't quite bring yourself to look at him. Grumbling under your breath, you went to join her in the kitchen.

"That was so unnecessary," you whined quietly as you rummaged in the drawer for her assortment of bags and loose leaf teas. You heard her chuckle, followed by the click as she turned on the electric kettle next to the sink.

"The way you talked about him, I thought he was an ogre with a hunched back and a warty nose," your mother teased, making you laugh in spite of yourself as you set tins and boxes on the little tray she had put on the counter for you. "So the nice boy out there is not exactly what I was expecting. Not that I was expecting to ever meet the Horrible Seokjin in the flesh."

"Yeah… he's okay," you admitted, avoiding her eyes as you arranged everything just so.

"Mhmm," she replied in unimpressed tones, too sharp to not wonder how you had gone from unadulterated hatred to proclaimed "good friends" in just a few months. You sort of wondered that yourself, sometimes.

Then again, now that you knew him better, it was easy to see that Seokjin was a good guy. He seemed to have a better understanding of you, as well, if the way he had handled your tantrum outburst at the bar was any indication.

After apologizing sheepishly to Hoseok, who gave you a happy grin that only increased your guilt, and another round of drinks, you had explained the gist of your current predicament. You absolutely refused any form of money, even when Hoseok has rolled his eyes and offered to draw up a formal, notarized loan agreement. It just felt wrong for something of this magnitude, even if you logically knew they trusted you to pay them back.

Instead, Jin suggested a review of the bill.

"It's common for hospitals to charge less for services if you don't use insurance," he explained after lecture, looking pensive and adorably handsome with his brow scrunched in thought. You were still working on accepting his advice rather than taking it as a criticism of yourself, or an implication that he thought you were incapable. "Or to offer a discount if you're able to pay up front."

"I don't know if I can do that in one go," you admitted reluctantly, shoving down the wave of defensiveness that tried to seal your lips. Instead of sighing or trying to push money on you - something you would have expected from the Jin you knew months ago - he just nodded.

"Then we can also look at the itemized bill and work from there," he suggested. "See if there is anything that was incorrectly denied for payment, or even if your mom was billed for extraneous items."

"Extraneous items?" you asked, wishing you felt more surprised. "How common is that?"

"Common enough," replied Jin with a sigh. "Especially when hospitals are a for-profit business."

"Of course," you muttered, already feeling the future headache coming on. Jin squeezed your shoulder, momentarily chasing away thoughts of medical procedure codes and descriptions. He was sitting next to you now, thigh pressed against your own, and his touch was somehow simultaneously reassuring and thrilling. Which you really didn't need right now.

Hoseok smiled at you from your other side and slung his arm around your shoulders.

Even if none of his suggestions ended up mitigating the situation, just having someone to lean on emotionally had already done a surprising amount to ease your state of mind.

"We're here for you, buddy," he said cheerfully, clinking his glass against yours. "Whether you need us or not."

Jin had started bringing three coffees to lecture - he was already getting some for himself, he might as well get some for his friends, he explained. By the look on Namjoon's face, it was probable that his coffee was just so you didn't have a reason to refuse your own. It should have embarrassed you, and yet you felt something akin to appreciation bloom beneath your skin.

Instead of previous times, where his "kindness" felt more like bribery, these actions felt sweet, without some condition of reciprocity attached. You didn't feel belittled, or that you owed him anything. What was it that had changed? Was it that you knew him better? Or because he himself had somehow tamed his obnoxiousness?

Perhaps it was a mixture of both.

"I just like seeing you smile," he said once, when you tried to pay him back. It was hard to hide the way those words affected you. So similar to "you should smile more," and yet they didn't fill you with murderous rage like the latter would have. When Seokjin said it that way, you could tell that what he really meant was that he wanted you to be happy.

In fact, you were noticing far too many things about Seokjin that you had - perhaps wilfully - been overlooking.

Like the way he treated everyone he came across the same, no matter who they seemed to be. (Other than you initially, which was starting to give you the suspicion that he was just an idiot, not intentionally an asshole.)

Jin was also attentive to his friends' needs - not just your own. He was actually kind, thoughtful in little ways like moving Namjoon's water bottle out of the way before his friend could knock it over, or sneaking pencils into his bag to replace the ones he inevitably lost. The first time you caught him, he had winked and put a finger to his lips, and you had spent the rest of the lecture wondering how he had made that wink look charming instead of creepy.

Then there was the sparkle in his eyes when he was excited, even if it was something as simple as braised pork. Or the way his cheeks plumped into cute rolls of bread when he smiled with his mouth closed. The horribly inviting jut of his plush lower lip when he pouted dramatically. It was like every time you looked at him, he somehow got cuter and more kissable, which was really not the way you needed your brain to go.

You tried to convince yourself it was because you had been too busy to meet up with Yoongi in a while. Key word: tried.

Deep down, you knew that while undoubtedly attractive, the bartender had never made your insides melt the way they were beginning to with each of Seokjin's smiles. You were pretty sure you also did not have that effect on him. The two of you got along well - particularly in bed - but there wasn't a particularly deep emotional connection there and you both knew it.

You certainly would never have even considered bringing Yoongi to meet your mother, despite knowing him better in the biblical sense.

Speaking of your mother, you realized you had not heard a single word she said in the last minute.

"Oops, sorry mom," you said apologetically. "I drifted off for a second."

"And what - or who - were you thinking about?" she asked teasingly, her eyes too knowing for your comfort.

"Nothing," you replied unconvincingly, wondering why every time you came back home you felt like a little kid with muddy socks.

"Mhmm," she replied, her tone making it clear she did not believe you in the slightest. To your relief, instead of pressing further she turned to fill the her kettle with water. "Whatever you say."

With a half-hearted grumble, you picked up the tray and took it back out to your friends, only to realize they were inspecting the pictures on the walls and mantle.

"You were so cute!" cooed Hoseok as he pointed to a picture of a particularly fat baby that looked more like a potato with a pink bow on it. You winced, wishing not for the first time that your mother's home didn't have quite so much of your memorabilia in it. The walls were covered in pictures of you growing up, and all the awards you had earned, whether from silly participation certificates or legitimate achievements.

"Your mom must be really proud of you," said Seokjin quietly, looking at the framed photo of you in your graduation robes, diploma in hand and a beaming mother at your side. "You worked really hard."

"I am," your mother announced as she entered the room bearing another tray with a kettle and mugs. "[Y/n] is my greatest accomplishment."

You felt your cheeks burn at the excessive attention, and you coughed to get rid of the sudden lump in your throat.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm amazing," you joked lightly, crossing your arms. "Now can we get to the point of the visit?"

The room settled for a few moments, quiet save for the clink of drinkware, and your mother listened attentively as you explained the billing situation.

It hadn't been your initial idea to include your mother in the discussion. At least, until Seokjin had pointed out that you were doing to her exactly what you had accused them of doing to you. It had been disturbing to be told you were ignoring your mother's own agency by Seokjin of all people, and even worse to realize you had no reasonable denial to his words.

Really, when had he become so astute? Had he always been this way? You had spent so long disdaining everything that came out of his mouth that it gave you whiplash to realize you actually respected his advice.

"That all seems very reasonable to me," your mother agreed, looking at you with her eyebrows raised. "I'm surprised my daughter asked for your help. She's always tried to solve things on her own."

"You can thank Jin for that," chortled Hoseok, slapping his friend on the shoulder. "He wore her down."

"Really," she replied, looking searchingly at Seokjin. His ears reddened under the scrutiny and he shrugged as he cast his eyes down at his mug.

"I mean, she's perfectly capable," he mumbled, seemingly fascinated by the swirl of dark liquid between his hands. Then he looked up, catching your eye. He smiled, and you felt a little bit of that sunlight leak into your chest again.

"Besides, what are friends for?"

~~~~~

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Tags: @pinkseokchim @bbl32 @highly-functioning-mitochondria @jinsleftairpod @8loominghell

#bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts imagines #kim seokjin x reader #bts fluff #bts x reader

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scienter · 2 months

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I have always wondered where did the narrative 'caroline said she won't take the cure' come from?Wasn't it Klaus,yet again, imposing his thoughts on Caroline that she preferred being ageless and immortal?When Caroline was asked,she had already convinced herself she wasn't getting the cure because, she said, there was only one and she knew everyone had been running around like headless chicken for that one cure so Elena could take it.She didn't even stand a chance because,even for a damn cure,Elena was the first choice.

Anyway,let's be real.It had only been less than a year since Caroline turned when they found the cure.She had just started to reclaim her lost self-confidence,regain her self worth,work on her abuse and trauma that she had undergone previously and enjoy the perks of vampirism as well.So maybe she wouldn't have taken the cure then.But isn't it normal for someone to have a different perspective of life and everything with time?Caroline never thought she would get the chance of being a mom but she did and went as far as ensuring her kids were protected & far away from the supernatural world as long as possible(even though that didn't make sense since they were born supernaturals being siphoners but it's tvd logic !).She even said she felt like dying when the twins were kidnapped.These emotions had nothing to do with being a vampire.Her desire to get married and have a normal family never went away with vampirism.She could barely handle herself when her mom died.She fell into depression after Stefan left. Did the narrative,despite all these, seriously want to convince us that,after her mom and husband were dead,Caroline would watch her kids grow old and drop dead while gleefully spending an eternity guzzling human blood like effing Kombucha?

Why wasn't Caroline Forbes allowed a narrative where she could reflect on the girl she was before she turned,the girl who was unloved,unaccepted, abandoned & raped,to the girl she grew into,after she turned, who learnt to love herself first ,proved herself to herself,to the woman she became who was loved by her friends and herself(since they had all grown out of their teenage mentality),who didn't seek external validation anymore?Why wasn't she allowed an opportunity to stop compartmentalizing her two selves and recognise that she had always been extraordinary?Caroline's journey was actually internal.Vampirism was like her training wheels.She had to let go of her training wheels ,at some point,to see if she had actually learnt anything,right?

I'm not saying she should have turned human to only play mommy to Lizzie & Josie or give a child to Stefan.But at least a storyline,that involved her considering the option and mulling over the choices,should have been explored especially when she was faced with a shortened future with Stefan due to their vampire-human mismatch.This should have made her realise that her time with her daughters was limited too.She didn't have an eternity with them.She never did unless she had been planning to pull a Katherine Pierce all along & turn both.Instead TVD had her convince herself that her excitement about an unknown future(with or without the vampire-human mismatch issue) with Stefan was always misguided in order to motivate herself to stay ignorant of what was to come.Being human wouldn't have invalidated her prior experience in my opinion.It would rather have helped her learn something new about herself that she didn't before.

Your thoughts?

Hey, anon! I think there are two reasons why the writers didn’t spend a lot of time on whether Caroline wanted the cure or not. First, the cure storyline centered on Elena and whether or not she’d take the cure. Caroline’s desire was ignored because her character was used in service to that plot. I know, I know -- Elena was the protagonist. She was the main character of the story. I get it. But the writers centered Elena so much that it cannibalized other character’s narratives. Second, the writers ignored thought-provoking story arcs for the side characters in favor of reductive storytelling. These two are often linked. You made a great point about how this affected Caroline – better than I could. So, I’m going to go into detail about how the writers ignored a fantastic character arc for Damon in season 4 by inserting the Stelena/Delena love triangle (i.e. Defan's Elena rivalry) into the cure storyline.

In the 4th season, Stefan and Damon are set in opposition to each other. Stefan wants Elena to take the cure so she won’t have to deal with the pain and guilt of being a vampire. Damon, however, doesn’t want Elena to take the cure because he doesn’t want Elena to grow old and die leaving him alone. You know – the usual black-and-white “good selfless brother” vs. “bad selfish brother” storyline they’d been force-feeding the audience for years. If that wasn’t reductive enough the writers took it one step further in the finale: Elena wanted Damon to take the cure, but Damon says he wouldn’t take the cure because he doesn’t want to be human.

The problem with Damon’s answer is that it contradicts Damon’s existential crisis in season 2: “I miss being human. I miss it more than anything in the world.”

What the hell writers!? How did Damon go from having an existential crisis because he missed being human to not wanting to take the cure because he doesn’t want to be human?

Damon was never given an arc for this. There was never an exploration of Damon’s feelings. There was never an explanation for this attitude change. The writers reversed Damon’s attitude out of nowhere in service of the Will-Elena-Take-The-Cure storyline (which turned out to be a symbolic which-brother-will-Elena-choose storyline).

This frustrated me because the cure storyline was the PERFECT OPPORTUNITY to explore Damon’s existential crisis from season 2 and the writers dropped the ball. They completely ignored it. Why? Well, you answered it in your ask:

“When Caroline was asked, she had already convinced herself she wasn't getting the cure because, she said, there was only one and she knew everyone had been running around like headless chicken for that one cure so Elena could take it. She didn't even stand a chance because, even for a damn cure, Elena was the first choice.”

Caroline’s potential storyline regarding the cure was ignored just like Damon’s existential crisis was ignored.

I know this probably wasn’t the answer you were hoping for. You asked me about Caroline and I talked about Damon. However, you made such great points about Caroline and potential storylines for her that were never explored that I don’t feel like I have anything to add. You also reminded me of what I think was one of the biggest wasted opportunities regarding the cure storyline, and it’s the one that frustrates me the most. The writers kept throwing out potential character arcs for the side characters because the story always centered around Elena.

#thank you for sharing your thoughts anon #you raise some interesting points about caroline #anon #ask #reply #tvd fuckery #tvd #tvd meta #caroline forbes #meta

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isfjmel-phleg · 1 year

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Today I walked to the public library downtown for their booksale. It's about a mile and a half from my place, not a bad walk. It wasn't too cold either, and the extreme wind we've had so much of lately is gone.

The road I take to get downtown is paved in red bricks. These were laid by the CCC in the 1930s, and they've seen better days. But they give the street a distinctive charm, and I like it. The houses in this part of town have character--no two of them alike. A dark red brick one with deep green trim. A light blue house with white trim that looks like it wants to be a cottage. Tall imposing places with pillars. An especially sad one that was probably beautiful once but is now abandoned and boarded up. A midcentury-style house with a courtyard in front. One of my favorites is a very ordinary little house made extraordinary with a staggering amount of colorful decorations in front. Planters, statuary, butterflies on the walls--all painted in vibrant pink, green, yellow, orange, white. It's probably objectively garish, but it's so unapologetically unique that it's a pleasure to see. I wonder who lives there and what sort of people they are.

A lot of businesses and public places in my town have specially painted cows, which all have names. The library has two inside: The Moo-ey Decimal System and Dairy Potter. I didn't stop to look at them today, although I should have. The sale wasn't a success for me. No much selection. My taste and that of people here who donate to the library don't really coincide. So I left pretty quickly but got to see white flowers on the trees just up the street, which was exciting.

Boringsville USA doesn't have a lot of variety in its businesses, but you can't say we don't have antique stores. Downtown is absolutely littered with them. I went to the largest one (three stories!) and prowled around. It's got a weird, dreamlike collection of oddities that go on forever. Wasn't expecting to find anything, but I did! A framed picture for the guest room (Edwardian-looking lady by the sea, very blue and relaxing), a small framed saying of the sort I need to be regularly bashed over the head with, a children's book exactly like one that my grandma had when we were kids, and a few comics in varying states of dilapidation, featuring some of The Children. Most comics I find in antique stores are unrecognizable, so it was a pleasure to encounter some familiar faces.

Heaven only knows what the lady who rang up that weird mix of things thought.

I had lunch at the coffee shop. I usually get the same half-sandwich with certain sorts of soup if available, but since they had the poblano soup today (which is not my thing), I tried a different kind of sandwich. I liked it.

Normally I would stop at the antique shop that sells a lot of books, but I didn't have expectations of finding anything this time and wasn't feeling up to small talk with the chatty elderly man who runs the store. So I went to a gift shop further on and bought a distressed yellow bird figurine because my house needs something cheerful for spring. The lady at this store knows me too because of my parents, who have frequently shopped there when they're in town, and my mom has semi-befriended the owners. She asked if my parents have been in town lately (...no), how they're doing, if I was still working on my degree, what I got my degree in, whether I was the first of my family to go to college here, whether any of my siblings went here too, where my sister is, and could I say hello to my parents for her. Maybe a few other things. Nice of her to remember. Small towns are like this. I wish I were as good as my mom at talking to shop owners.

Got all my steps in by the time I got home. Pretty good day.

#random personal stuff #this is not important but it's your slice-of-life episode for the day

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lostonehero · 4 months

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I dunno what this is.

The silence in the office was deafening as the sound of heels clicked against the tile floor. Everyone seemed frozen in place, and Martin didn't notice as he organized his papers until he heard someone clear their throat. He blinks and looks up, he didn't know who the person is, but he recognizes the badge. "Oh uh, I can't turn anyone, er uh Blackwood, I uh...."

"O-oh." The woman shifts and blushes with a bow. "I didn't know this is where you settled majesty."

"Please don't call me that." Martin swallows. "Why are you guys here? The fears are a human problem." He knew his story was infamous his mom stole him from his father, hid him as a human like her. Turning 18 was a major crossroads for him his mother's powers were nowhere strong enough to stop his powers and body changing.

The woman stands up straight her empty sockets didn't frighten Martin. "N-no uh Blackwood, there was a recent-"

The room falls silent again as a door opens. A short, thin man with slick back hair with streaks of white in the raven hair stepped out of the room with a scowl. "Why is it so quiet? Who are you people? Unauthorized people are not welcome in the archives." He pauses, noticing Tim and Sasha are acting as if he didn't come out or these people are in here.

"You're the victim of the wolf attack." The woman adjusts her sunglasses.

"I wouldn't call it a wolf, ad what did you do?" He looks around and thins his lips. "Martin, who are these people?"

The man barely his teeth. "How -"

Martin raised his hand. "It's ok, and uh Jon, I'm not formally acquainted with them they are an authority group to uh help people. You were bitten and obviously turned since you can notice them under their spell."

The woman nods, taking off her sunglasses, revealing empty sockets. "It's quite rare for turnings to happen and even more so this far into a human populated city, especially near a beacon of a fear patron. However, things do slip through the cracks." She pulls out a book and a few forms. "Now Jon, was it? I need you to fill these forms out and read up and prepare for the next full moon. You'll need a keep for the first few months until you get a handle on things."

"This is absurd!" Jon stares at the papers. "Werewolfs are merely fiction."

Martin sighs. "I can watch over him."

The man speaks up, and Jon finally notices he has eyes covering his arms and face. "We wouldn't want to impose you with that formality, sir."

"No, no, it's ok it would be easier with someone he knows. I wouldn't mind helping him transition the process to get overwhelming, and remember, I'm also new to this." Martin smiles softly and turns back to Jon. "Come on, just fill out the papers, and I can help with the formalities."

Jon steps back, realizing that wasn't a costume and the woman's empty eye sockets were full of razor teeth. "I uh w-w-what..." He faints collapsing on the floor.

"Oh dear." The woman sighs. "I really would have thought working here he would have been prepared."

"It's ok." Martin gets up. "I can sign for him, and uh, I'll take him back to my place for the night."

"Are you sure, sir?" The man asks, lowering his gaze.

Martin nods, already grabbing a pen. "I'm still getting the hang of things, and so it would be nice to have someone who's in the same boat kind of. Also, please just call me Martin, I uh I'm nkt anyone special no matter my species or uniqueness of what I am."

The woman nods, grabbing her partner. "We shall create a cover for you both. Thank you for signing them, Blackwood. Have a lovely evening." The woman and the man walk out together as Martin picks up Jon and the book and carries him out.

.....

Jon woke up he was still in his clothes, but he didn't know where he was.

"Jon?" Martin smiles and places a cup of tea on the coffee table. "I'm glad you're awake. You probably have like a million questions, but I can answer a few, and uh oh, here's your phone." He points to the table where Jon's phone was placed next to the fresh cup of coffee. "I uh didn't know what would be appropriate so I just made some tea and I left the book for you."

Jon sat up, but Martin didn't even remove his glasses. Which made sense he knew the man to be incredibly nervous and wouldn't want to impose even in this ridiculous situation. "How much did you pay the actors? How did you get Tim and Sasha to join along?"

"W-what?" Martin steps back. "I uh what? No! " He takes a breath. "Jon, you were attacked last night." He pauses for a raised brow of acknowledgment. "Do you still have the bite?"

Jon looked unimpressed as he rolled up his pants leg to show white bandages, and he unwrapped them from his leg, and that annoyed look dropped in almost an instant. In its place of the bite was a neatly healed scar as if the attack had happened years ago. He swallowed as he began to pale. "Martin?"

"Please don't pass out again." Martin sighs. "I uh know a bit about werewolves and other species er I mean I know that you're very early into this and uh you wont be able to stay vegetarian. I uh, you haven't even got more hair yet I uh...." He stops himself.

"What are you?" Jon stares at Martin.

Martin frowns. "I uh, that's complicated. I mean, I was technically kidnapped from my father by my mother. Not important, I uh, I think, Fae? No, uh, I mean, nobody has outright told me what I am, and I haven't even met my father yet." He sighs. "I just call it spider centaur, but even then, that isn't 100% accurate. My mother is human, and not that really makes a difference. I'm still a little human.... I hope...." He pulls a necklace from his sweater. "This thing keeps me human looking physically and uh biologically. My father made it for me, again I still haven't met him."

"Martin." Jon interrupts taking a breath. "I think I would like to read this book now."

"Oh, uh, right." Martin sighs. "I can answer any other questions if you have." He rushed to his kitchen clearly embarrassed for talking so much.

......

"Martin." Jon, shut the guidebook in his hands. The sun has long dipped below the horizon. Whatever Martin was making made him drool.

Marrin popped back into view. "I uh yes? I uh did sign the papers to look after you for the next six months as you adjust. Right, you know that I put a note in there. I uh I'm making some ground beef I uh you'll need more meat in your diet."

Jon could feel a blush on his cheeks before he sighed. "I realized my argument for vegetarianism fell apart quite fast while reading. I do have questions."

"Oh uh ok go ahead." Martin smiles, trying his best to not seem lit of place in his own apartment.

"Since we will be spending more time together, I would like it if you didn't feel nervous around me. We will be er friends, and I wouldn't be your boss. I understand we can't tell the other, but could you explain the comment about the fears earlier?" Jon looks conflicted for a moment. "I'm Trans I uh I really don't know what it would do to my hormones."

Martin blinks. "I uh oh....." He smiles softly, and he doesn't know why Jon relaxed. "Actually, the majority of supernatural creatures can do what animals do, and uh, switch how they present gender wise. So again, you're going to want to stock up on razors, werewolves, they are quite hairy for those who present as male, and I uh don't know what that would do for you. Uh you won't actually be the first trans man I've met as a werewolf but uh he was born as a werewolf so things are different for him kind of it blends together after a year has passed. Uh, right, I should ask him as well about the hormones."

Jon relaxed. He had a stupid crush on Martin, and they couldn't because he was his boss, but he literally just reaffirmed him and didn't flinch when he came out. "I have been on T for five years now."

"Ah, uh, good for you." Martin pauses then waves his hands "Sorry sorry I didn't mean to sound dismissive. I just I don't think you'll need it anymore. Uh..." He pulls out his phone, and after texting for a long moment, he slides it back in his pocket. "I asked uh oh shoot I don't want your food to burn." He rushed back into the kitchen and returned with overcooked meat. "I'm so sorry."

Jon takes a bite, and it's the meal he has ever had. He's so fucked.

......

Martin burst into the quiet office, and Jon nearly threw his recorder at the wall.

"Martin!" Jon huffs. "This is a workplace, not a circus! What has possessed you to burst into my office like a wild animal."

Martin flinched and slowly closed the door behind him. He showed his phone wordlessly and swallows. "I uh... I uh my friend responded and I thought you would uh like the news."

Jon could feel shame eat at him inside. He wanted to reach out and hug the man. He stops answering blinks and rubs his forehead. Where did that even come from? He took a breath and sighed. "I'm sorry, Martin." He wanted to kiss that adorable nervous smile off that man's face. He covered his face and groaned. It's been a week since he has no idea where this is coming from.

Martin chuckles. "Right well, you were warned about a shorten temper and new hormones and instincts, but uh, work is work." He shifts as Jon looks at him again. "Oh right, the news... throw out your hormones like yesterday, your body is now producing its own supply. I uh, he was very clear on that you should also start wearing looser pants and such because of that. He said things will get sensitive and I mean good for you? I really don't know how you feel about it, but he made it clear to warn you."

Jon pinched his brow. "Martin, I've been through t. I know what I have to do, and I already went through it." He sighs. "I have to go through it a second time, don't I." He groans at the small nod from the larger man. "What else is there?"

"Oh, right!" Martin pulls out some jerky. "He also said this helps with the new teeth and cravings. I also wanted to ask where you wanted to be on the full moon."

Jon grabs the dried meat with a huff. He freezes, right the full moon. That is what this is leading up to. "Shouldn't I go somewhere isolated?"

"Not necessarily." Martin hums. "You won't remember, obviously, but if you're comfortable and familiar with the area, there is a much lower chance of lashing out. Lots of familair smells and a big meal beforehand is recommended. I just wanted to know where you wanted to be, where you would feel the safest, and I can be there to look after you and remember you don't have to worry you can't turn me."

Jon blinks and crosses his arms. "I have time to decide, correct?" Martin nods before he continues. "Then let me wait. I shall be over next weekend unless, as I said before, something comes up."

Martin nods and opens the door. "I uh also sorry about rushing in."

"No. It's quite alright. I appreciate the information." Jon smiles softly.

"You go get it, Martin!" Tim shouts from his desk, and Martin quickly rushed out red-faced.

Jon chuckles.

......

Jon knew he was asexual and that didn't exactly mean he was sex repulsed he just didn't have to have it. That never did stop the urges he followed just without another person until now. He didn't know if it was these new hormones or the instincts, but his mind was hellbent on showing him lewd imaginations of Martin. He was in actual hell it was a week before the full moon, and he felt like his mind was twisting on itself.

He actually snapped at Elias earlier. It was kind of humorous, but he didn't even understand why he looked surprised and not upset.

Tim and Sasha think he's dating Martin secretly and keep winking at him and giving thumbs up. He didn't not want that. He feels like he would abuse the situation he was in with the larger man. He was Martin's boss he could ruin his career if things went wrong. Alright, if he survives the full moon, he'll ask the man out and hope things don't go poorly.

Jon threw his blankets off of him. It was bad enough dealing with the new body hair he thought going through t the first time was annoying, but this was puberty a second time. Everything was weird and sensitive and gross. He just wanted to feel normal, and he knew that wouldn't happen until after the full moon. The waiting was the worst part he couldn't even stay after to work to clean up the mess left by his predecessor. He wanted to call Martin.

......

"Would you feel better if I removed this?" Martin holds up that intricate metal necklace.

"W-what?" Jon blinked as he sat in Martin's flat.

"I uh mean so you wouldn't feel so alone." Martin rubs his arm. "I'm not human either. Would it make you feel better to see me like that? I mean, I know you're scared of spiders... er wait, that would be a bad idea. Forget I said anything."

Jon shook his head. Oh, he wanted to see, and he wanted even more to comfort the larger man. "I uh if you're comfortable. The sun won't be setting for another hour, and I did just finish eating."

Martin nods, and he slowly removes the necklace, and for a moment, nothing happens. Then his form flickers and then in his place at least two feet taller stands a lower half that of a spider he has now two pairs of arms eight eyes and sharp teeth. He also had pointed ears his red hair had a stripe of white in his hair. He also had horns on his head, and his tongue was forked. His hands were clawed as well, and he had splatters of freckles all over his body along with patches of armor or scales? Jon didn't know what they were. "Well I uh give me a moment." He splays out his legs and relaxes on the floor. "There now I'm kind of smaller."

Jon couldn't help but laugh. "Fuck you're adorable." He covered his mouth as soon as the words slipped from his mouth.

Martin locked eyes with the man, and his face was covered in a purple blush. "L-lets talk when you aren't being pumped full of hormones and endorphins gearing for the full moon." He quickly puts his necklace back on and tries his best to ignore the whine Jon made.

......

Jon woke up he remembers the pain of the pure agony of his body changing, then nothing. it's as if he has a blind spot in his memory. The place he was in wasn't ruined, and the sun filtered through the curtains peacefully. He was hungry, but he was told that would be normal. He also felt more in control as if his body finally got that piece to fit in place, and now he felt like himself again. He was lying on something soft, though he shifted, and what he was lying on made a noise. "Ah..."

The thing under Jon shifted, and he landed in his lap. "Oh...." Martin yawns. "Good morning. I had to stop you from eating your glasses."

"....what?" Jon squints, barely able to see anything without his glasses.

"You were really playful and tried to eat your glasses like they were a toy. You then decided that you had enough and fell asleep on top of me. I mean, it wasn't awful, but I would rather not sleep on the floor again." Martin yawns and pulls out a thick pair of glasses from his pocket and put them on Jon. "You also need to invest in chew toys. You tried to chew on everything and succeeded in breaking my coffee table to chew on the wooden legs. You were like a giant puppy."

Jon suddenly felt very small and embarrassed trying to cover himself up.

"Oh, don't worry, I took videos and pictures." Martin hums. "Your clothes are on the couch. I'm going to clean up. Uh, you don't have to spend any more time with me either, I can just come by during the full moon if that makes you more comfortable."

"N-no." Jon takes a breath. "I think I would like to double down on last night."

"W-what?" Martin pushed Jon away to stand up.

"I uh I like you Martin." Jon looked away blush clearly on his features.

"...oh." Martin could feel the air rush from his lungs. "I like you too."

"Good now that we are in agreement. I need to get dressed. I shall see you tomorrow at work, and I expect the coffee shop down the road would suffice today for a first official date." Jon rushed through and locked himself in the bathroom, forgetting his clothes.

Martin blinks he is a blushing mess.

.......

Things seemed to settle as time marched forward as it normally did. That was until Sasha stumbled into work pale and asleep on her feet. Jon could smell something wrong, and he did not like that he could smell a change.

Martin hums as he moves a stack of papers off his desk and nearly drops them as Jon rushed in front of him. "I... uh hi Jon."

"Sasha is different." Jon huffs. "Can't you, I mean can't you smell her?"

"N-no? My necklace makes me human externally, and internally, I don't have those senses like this." Martin sighs. "Why, what do you smell?"

Jon steps back and scratches at his stubble that he is incredibly proud to have. "Blood? Not fresh, but uh, also dust?"

Martin nods. "Ah that isn't good."

"W-what? Why?" Jon reminded Martin of an alert cat no matter how much he was a wolf man now.

"Vampire attack, she probably is in the early stages of turning. Uh, not like the vampires from the statements. Those are fear creatures from the patrons. Uh, we should get her an umbrella, and I'll put in a request for Uh help."

"An umbrella? Martin, it's sunny out." Jon raised his brow.

"That's why." Martin blinks. "I'm sorry, have you never read a piece of vampire fiction?"

"No? I never liked them." Jon pauses. "Oh, the sunlight."

Martin sighs.

....

Sasha sighs and looks up at Martin. "Hey Martin I'm not really in the mood for a cup of tea." She frowns as he pushes it towards her.

"Just have some please you look awful pale." Martin smiles.

Sasha sighs and nods, taking a sip to please the larger man, and suddenly, she realizes she has finished the cup. That wasn't tea, and maybe that attack after a night of drinks wasn't normal. "Fuck I got turned to a vampire didn't I?"

Martin blinks and stares at her.

"If that's true, why am I able to talk?" Sasha pursed her lips. "Are there different types of vampires?"

Martin opens his mouth and closes it a few times. "Yes?"

"Are you a vampire? Is that how you knew I turned? What other creatures exist?" Sasha looked like an excited puppy.

"I uh, you're taking this way better than I thought was possible." Martin blinks. "Un for one no I am not a vampire, and uh Jon noticed he's a werewolf, and not like the creature from the statements actually alot of the so called fake statements are actually true but whatever. I, uh, I wasn't born human, so yeah."

Sasha looked even more excited. "I have so many questions." She turns to Tim, who was listening to music and nkt paying attention. "TIM!"

Tim removes his headphones. "Are you finally going to put a pin in our will they won't they relationship?" He had a smirk on his lips.

"No, but vampires are real, and I am one!" Sasha makes a point to show off fangs she just figured out how to reveal.

"When we're you bitten?" Tim raised a brow, and Martin was shocked he wasn't surprised.

"Why are you not freaking out?" Sasha took the words from Martin's mouth.

Martin blinks and spots the tattoo on Tim's neck. "Oh! You're a hunter."

"Marto is correct. It's kind of an outdated term now and days. Did you like the acting I did when the cops came around like three months ago?" Tim smiles. "I was a tree in my elementary school play."

Sasha snorts. "Is nobody here normal?"

"Depends on your definition." Tim wiggles his brows.

Sasha giggles.

Martin hums. "I didn't realize."

Tim nods. "Yeah, I keep my mark hidden for obvious reasons. I will have to look into that bite of yours, Sasha. Vampire turnings are even rarer than werewolves, but they tend to be targeted and more dangerous to cause a panic. An undocumented fledgling can easily turn countless people or kill even more."

"Tim's right." Martin pursed his lips. "I uh huh... I should ask Elias if he's some sort of creature."

Sasha smirks. "Could you imagine? Reporting nobody who works for the Magnus Institute is normal."

Tim chuckles. "That would be hilarious."

"What would be hilarious?" Jon walks in shifting away from Sasha.

"Oh Jon, don't worry, Tim's a hunter he's cool, and Sasha is taking this better than I've ever seen anyone do." Martin smiles as Jon relaxes.

"Thst is quite alright then. However, why is no one working?" Jon raised his brow.

"Because we're planning a monster mash." Tim snickers. "Aren't you a bit curious about what I do and what I am? Hunters aren't human well, not after they become a hunter."

"After work." Jon sighs.

"Kill joy." Sasha chuckles. "Back to work, everyone boss man declares it."

Tim chuckles.

Martin smiles

Jon smiles after he shuts the door to his office.

.....

#the magnus archives #tma

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lepusrufus · 3 years

Note

Don't know if you're up for this but 👀👀👀 can we get a family bonding? Like Alcina and the girls with their maidens. 👀If you have time?

You mean headcanons (or more like canon to my au lol)? Because yes I will gladly ramble abt all of them being a big gay family

Look the girls know that Alcina loves and supports them, but they're all very much hesitant to go "hey mom I'm in love with one of our maids"

Bela being the mild exception since Laura is Donna's apprentice and Alcina already respects her by proxy but even then they wait to break the news on their own terms

Let's be honest though Alcina knows

She knows everything that goes down in her castle and just because she won't mention it doesn't mean she's not aware of it (and Dani is the epitome of lacking subtlety)

"Yeah sure Cassandra i bet you enjoy your new little lab partner and all she does in your study is mop the floor and section bodies mhmm.."

Fine you're in a relationship with a maid let's dress her in some more presentable clothes though

Alcina knows how it's like to be forced into a relationship/marriage you don't want so she would never impose such a thing on her daughters

So yeah needles to say she's supportive of their relationships

However

She does have the talk with them

Ya know, good ol "what are your intentions with my daughter" while menacingly sipping on wine

Nicole's answer goes like "with all due respect my Lady but I would rather throw myself off the tallest tower than pretend to love Cassandra"

It does take a little while for them to settle into the family rhythm especially for the maidens

You know, going from "this 3 m tall lady will cut me to ribbons if I make a mistake" to "welp guess she's my mother in law now and asks me if I'd like some wine over dinner"

Once they do settle in, they really are a big gay family

Nicole is the one that in a way keeps her "job" in the castle, while Anita is uhhhh.... idk trophy wife but male it wholesome af

Laura, who still works with Donna, is the only one not permanently staying at the castle, but it gives Bela an excuse to visit her aunt more often

They all watch Eurovision together you can't convince me otherwise

Nicole is hella confused the first time, being the only american there

Each and every one of them would strung up and torture the poor idiot who thinks hurting Anita in any way is a good idea

Mostly Daniela and Nicole

Laura: Daniela please stop plucking the flowers in the garden to give to Anita just ask me for some you're ruining the composition

Laura joins in on the classic lit reading sessions and Anita watches them reenact the scenes while laughing and occasionally making suggestions

Meanwhile Cassandra and Nicole are in a corner with the biology textbooks

Until Nicole starts quoting Dante and Cassandra groans into a pillow for 5 minutes straight

Alcina watches this unfold over her copy of Carmilla and is highly entertained

Nicole: okay so which of you would like to make the sacrifice of 1 (one) fly for me to dissect

Nicole, walking in Dani's bedroom: Anita i got you some- stop screaming it's just me- i got you some chocolate and water, good for the blood loss.

Alcina now has double the number of gremlins to keep track of and prays that nobody starts a prank war

Nicole called Alcina mom once. Accidentally. Nobody brought it up ever again

When she's not busy, Donna joins them for dinner and maybe a little walk in the forest if the weather allows for it

She's pleasantly surprised with how they all like Angie (i mean Laura likes her from the get go, but the other two are a surprise)

Nicole thinks te creep factor is hilarious and nicknames her Annabelle (after explaining the context obv)

They all gave a gool ol' murderous time like the evil cultish family they are yay

#bela dimitrescu x maiden #cassandra dimitrescu x reader #daniela dimitrescu x maiden #lady dimitrescu #donna beneviento #headcanons #asks #this got kinda long sorry hehe

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andreafmn · 3 years

Text

I’m Not Afraid - Chapter 2

Word Count: 4,585

Characters: Female Reader Argent Character, Original Male Argent Character, Derek Hale, Allison Argent, Scott McCall, Stiles Stilinski, Isaac Lahey, Lydia Martin, Chris Argent, Jackson Whittemore

Story Description: (Y/N) Argent arrived at Beacon Hills to put to rest her father’s sister, Kate Argent. For the first time, her family has decided to settle down and sustain a life in this interesting small town. After 17 years, (Y/N) has the opportunity to establish interpersonal relationships but will she be ready to face the complications that come with relating to her cousin’s, Allison, friends; especially, the infamous Derek Hale. She will face the adventure of being associated with the Derek and McCall pack as well as being faced with the discovery of certain aspects of her life she never imagined.

*DISCLAIMER* I do not own in any way Teen Wolf, all credits of the pre-established characters, script, and storyline belong to Jeff Davis and MTV Network. The only thing I own is Argent Reader insert, her immediate family, and her storyline, as well as her effects in the others’ storyline.

Chapter: 2/?

A/N: SOFT DEREK, SOFT DEREK!!!!! If you enjoy my writing I’ll also be posting them in AO3 and Wattpad along with other stories (I also hope to start taking requests if ya’ll want) Hope you enjoy and all constructive criticism is encouraged.

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Chapter 2

5:00 am my phone read.

It was usual for my brain to be awake at this hour. Since before I can remember it was part of the schedule I followed, everywhere I went. It was a small thing, but the sense of normalcy was a comforting friend. It made sense to follow a routine I could have anywhere. I was out of bed and into workout clothes, ready for a quick jog around the woods.

I started off with a slow and comfortable trot before speeding up once I reached the tree-filled terrain. The smell of wet soil, the sound of birds chirping and leaves rustling, the crunching of leaves under my feet was oddly comforting. There was a strange pull that came from the heart of Beacon Hills. I had lived in many places in my short lifetime but this place was different, the atmosphere was different, the people were different. One of those people was Derek Hale, the mysterious, broody, sarcastic man that had bumped his way in.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"Why are you stopping?" He asked, a small chuckle escaping his mouth.

"How did you get here? Where the hell did you come from?"

"You're not the only person who jogs in this town and this happens to be the trail I take. You know, you should work out on a trail that is closer to your house. Makes it easier to actually go back."

I looked around. Once again, I had trailed off and didn't know where I was. "Lucky for you, I have a great memory. We can finish off running and I'll instruct you back to your house."

"You know you sound like a stalker." We started to jog once again.

"How so?"

"Well, you've only been there like two or three times and you already know the way back. Creepy!"

"Oh, come on, it means that I have a very sharp memory. Unlike you who can't seem to remember what house you live in."

"Touché."

The con and occasionally laughing at something. It felt good talking to him, almost natural. There was a supernatural attraction that I felt when I was near him, an unusual need for his closeness. Our relationship came easy, as the cliché would have it, it felt like I had known him all my life.

We ran for about an hour and a half before we turned back. "I think it's time we went back. You have school in an hour."

"Whoa, take the stalking down a notch."

"Oh, come on, I went to that school before you, I think I know the schedule."

"Alright, grandpa. Let's head back. It's time for your breakfast smoothie and then some bingo."

"Very funny." He ruffled my hair whilst fake laughing.

"I try." We ran and ran until I came into view of the curb that led to the house. "Well, this is my exit. Would it be too much to ask for you to take me to school?"

"Not a problem. Meet you back here at 7:45?"

"That would be perfect." He kissed my cheek and left to run to where I believe was his house. My face turned red, and I ducked inside.

"Mom? Dad?" I entered the kitchen and noticed a note over a covered plate. "Left for work early. Eat your food and go to school." I read out loud.

I took my time getting ready for school. My bag was already packed, as was my lunch. A long shower and a slow breakfast were in store as I awaited Derek's black Camaro to roll into my driveway.

"Thanks so much for the lift. I packed you some breakfast."

"No problem and thank you." He smiled. "You know, maybe after school, I can finally give you a tour around town. So you can familiarize yourself."

"That would be wonderful." I checked my schedule. "Actually, you can pick me up an hour before school ends. I have study hall at that hour, and no one would care if I left."

"I think I can make that arrangement." He looked at me showing a perfect set of white teeth and a smile that would make anyone melt. "But wouldn't your parents know that you left school? I mean, you won't be there when they go pick you up."

"I'll just tell them Allison gave me a ride or walked home," I said thinking of more excuses I could tell my parents. Distracted by my thoughts, my hand started reaching out to the powered-off radio and I didn't notice that so did Derek's. A sharp current went up my arm as our hands make contact. We both quickly pulled away and I could feel the blood rushing to my face turning it a deep shade of red.

"Sorry, I shouldn't impose. It's your car." I spoke up, quick to start picking at the skin around my fingernails to busy my hands. Derek perceived the nervous nature of my actions and stopped my fussing by putting one of his hands over mine.

"Don't worry it's fine. Just put the radio on whatever station you like." He smiled reassuringly and I reached to the radio and just turned it on, leaving it in the last station it had been on.

"Ugh, I absolutely dread going to school. Most of it I'm gonna forget either way."

"I'd tell you to ditch but that would be shame on me, so I won't. But think about it, this day you'll only get 7 hours of school and then you can hang out with me. Best present ever."

"Yeah, don't think so highly of yourself. Maybe I'll just wander around town until I find my way home."

"Very funny." He stopped at the drop-off zone. "This is your stop."

"Thanks again for the ride, awfully kind actions from such a sour wolf" I laughed at his scowl. "I'll see you in the afternoon."

"Looking forward to it." I exited the car and he waited till I was on the sidewalk to speed off.

"Was that Derek Hale that just dropped you off?" I turned around and was met face-to-face with Scott.

"Yeah. What's the problem?" Not that it will matter.

"You shouldn't trust him, he's bad news."

"Honestly, Scott, I understand your good intentions, but I'll sort out the wrong kind on my own terms." He looked taken aback at my response, probably thinking I would not talk back.

"I'm sorry if I offended you, but he is not a person that anyone should be with." With that, he left with worry evident on his face.

I understood that he was looking out for my "well-being”, but he didn't know me and I'm pretty sure he didn't know Derek either. Maybe that's what Derek meant when I met him. Everyone thinks he is a bad person, but he hasn't done anything wrong in my eyes.

I walked over to my locker and started exchanging my books. Closely next to me I could hear Scott talking to Allison about me and Derek, and my name should be out of his mouth. Once I finished with my locker, I slammed the door and they both stopped talking, noting my close presence. I walked past them feeling their worried stares burning my back. This was going to be a hell of a year. The only thing that could get me through it was the acquaintance relationship I have with Isaac. I did text him a bit last night but mostly helping him with homework. Lord knows he needs all the help he can get.

We all stood around in gym class as Stiles and Erica climbed the rock wall. Everyone else had gone including Scott who mastered a great fall. Stiles appeared to have fun, but Erica would let out sounds of discomfort and shortness of breath as she climbed. At a point, she stopped.

"Erica, are you dizzy?" Coach said. "Is it vertigo?"

"Vertigo is the dysfunction of the vesicular system of the inner ear" Lydia stated in a mocking tone. "She's just freaking out."

"Erica!" Coach screamed.

"coach, maybe it’s not safe. you know she's epileptic." Allison stated. How does no one care?

"Wh-why does no one tell me this?!" Coach Finstock questioned annoyed. "Erica, just fall back, there's a mat that will catch you."

She slowly let go of the wall and made her descent. No one seemed to care that the poor girl was shaken to the core; they all laughed.

When class was over everyone headed to their respective locker rooms to change. Something inside me kept pulling me back to the gym, so I walked back as I put on my shirt. As I opened the doors, I saw Erica fall from the wall and luckily into Scott's arms. He slowly put her on the floor as the class ran in behind us.

"Put her on her side," I stated.

"How did you know?" Allison whispered to Scott.

"I just felt it." He whispered back.

After Erica had calmed, the coach called an ambulance to take her to be checked at the hospital and the day went by normally. I was currently in my "last" period. Tapping my nails in a rhythmic pattern waiting for the stupid bell to ring. Only 5 more minutes and I would be out of here. This was the first time I had done something like this. I always stick by the rules and make sure to follow all of them. My heart was racing, and my palms were sweating. In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Cue the bell. I grabbed all my things and stuffed them in my bag. I used to my advantage the fact that everyone was piled in the hallway and headed outside. Waiting for me was Derek in his black Camaro. Suddenly my heart steadied its pace and I felt relaxed.

"Hey there, rebel." He smirked at me as I entered the car and buckled my seatbelt.

"Don't make small talk. Just go." I said whilst trying to hide by burrowing in the seat. If I could I would have jumped into the trunk to avoid any hidden stares from authority figures.

"Don't tell me you've never done this before." I shook my head no and felt my face growing warmer by the second. "Aw, you're so innocent. For a big mouth that is." I slapped his arm as hard as I could.

"Don't be rude." I crossed my arms, slouched down, and pouted. He looked over at me and laughed. That made me slouch farther down.

"Oh, come on. Don't get mad." He ruffled my hair and laughed once again when I swatted his hand away. "Yeesh, feisty."

"So, where's our first pit stop?" I asked whilst looking out the window not wanting to look at his face.

"A small diner I know. Wouldn't want you to starve." He smirked. "Might make you angrier."

"I am not angry, just annoyed."

"Got some feelings hurt?" He said laughing.

"Derek, don't be rude. You will regret it."

"Oh, what could you do?"

"Is that a challenge?" He didn't answer, just laughed. I rolled down the window and stuck my head out. "HELP!! This man is kidnapping me!! HELP!! Bloody he...!"

My sentence was cut short by Derek's hand pulling me down by my jacket and onto the seat again.

"Why did you do that?" I asked innocently. I had caused the faces of a few people on the street to look at the car in horror.

"You know why! That was totally uncalled for."

"I told you that being rude was something you would regret. I'm not one to say this a lot but, I told you so."

He tried his best to keep a tight scowl on his face but in a matter of seconds, we were laughing at my past actions.

"Whatever, we're here." He turned off the car and went to the passenger side to open the door for me.

"Why thank you," I said and took his extended hand to pull my weight up.

"No problem." I smiled at his goofy courtesy but as we walked inside the establishment I could feel my heart beating faster by the second. "Table for two." Derek pointed at a booth made for two people exactly. Once we had sat down a lady maybe in her late thirties approached us to take our order.

"What do you want to order today, darlings?" She gave us a warm smile as she waited for our response.

"I'll have the bacon cheeseburger with some onion rings, a stack of pancakes, and some chicken fillets, a Diet Coke, and afterward some pie, please."

"Would you like the kitchen sink with that?" I said in shock. "I think I'll just get the, ummmm, bacon cheeseburger also with some onion rings and an iced tea. Maybe add some pie afterward too."

The lady laughed a bit, nodded, and smiled at us as she turned to the kitchen to put out our order.

"So, someone's a bit hungry. Huh, sour wolf?" I chuckled.

"Why do you call me that?" He said somewhat annoyed.

"I don't know. It just fits you."

"How?"

"Cause you're very sour and you kind of look like a wolf. Hairy face and crazy hair. I don't know how to explain it. It's just a nickname, though. If it makes you mad I can just call you something else."

"I'm not mad. Just wondering." He slouched on the seat looking less tense. "How is it that I'm usually so bad with meeting people yet with you, I just clicked?"

"I don't know. I'm just special that way."

"Very funny."

"I know! I could take up a career in comedy." He chuckled as he threw a sugar packet at me. "So, since we are getting to know each other we should know basic things about one another. Let me start. What's your favorite color?"

"Maybe black or blue. What about you?"

"Totally red and black." The waitress came with our drinks. I took a sip of my iced tea and continued with the questions. "Favorite place to be?"

"That house in the woods where we met." I gave him a weird look.

"Why there? It barely stands with a foundation. What could possibly be there?"

"It's the house I used to live in before it burnt down. My family was in there." I choked on my drink when he said this.

"Oh my gosh, Derek. I'm so sorry I brought it up. We can drop the topic."

"Don't worry about it. It happened such a long time ago it's sometimes relieving talking about it." After there was an awkward silence, so Derek cleared his throat and asked a question. "Um, and what's your favorite place to be?"

"I'm not sure. Usually, I like places more because of the people I'm with. But if I had to choose probably the woods, it's the calmest place I know. The only place where you can actually be free."

"Wow, Ms. Argent. So poetic. It touched me." He pointed at his heart. "Right here."

"Very funny, now, favorite sport?" And the game went on even when our food served. Whilst eating we kept asking each other questions and getting to know each other profoundly. This has been the first time I had ever opened up to someone. It felt strange. Letting someone know small details about yourself. Making yourself vulnerable to them. Showing them how they could break you. But this was different. I felt like I was just becoming closer to him.

"We should do that someday. I mean the thought of just leaving for a whole day, not knowing where you are going, just finding an adventure."

"Definitely. You decide when the first time." I smiled at him.

"That's a deal." He looked down at his watch. "I think it's time I take you home. Don't want your parents to worry."

"Alright. Let's go." I grabbed my bag and was about to pay my part of the check, but he wouldn't let me. He grabbed the money I left and paid completely. "I don't understand the need of being such a gentleman if this wasn't a date. Just two people hanging out."

"So, this wasn't a date?"

"You thought it was?" I thought about it. "What do you classify a date per se?"

"An outing in which two people go out and get to know each other a little bit more." What he said made sense. It had never dawned on me that this could have been anything other than just a casual outing, but not being too well versed in normal social encounters, let alone dating encounters.

"Alright, you win. I have officially gone on my first date."

"No way. This could not have been your first date." When he saw the serious look on my face, he stopped chuckling. "I'm so sorry you had to have given you such a crappy first date. I promise I'll make up for it one day."

"Deal." We even shook on it. "Now let's get going before my parents know I'm late."

During the drive back, he pointed out different key places I should know when going around Beacon Hills as well as easier routes to these places. Although I was heavily grateful for all the useful tips, my brain could hardly remember the first route he showed me.

When we got to my house, I noticed that my father's car was not in there. I guess they haven't arrived yet. I said goodbye to Derek and entered the house, thanking him for a lovely afternoon. I changed into workout attire and, deciding to stay home, went to the basement and started working out. After half an hour of running and half an hour of physical training, I decided it was enough and went to take a shower. I noticed that my parents weren't home yet.

"I wonder what's holding them back?" After my shower, I continued my current read of Pride and Prejudice. But something was bothering me, a thought that wouldn't leave my head.

I'm leaving once the year is over. Getting close to Derek will fuck me up once I leave. I've never had to say goodbye to anyone. I can't start now. I'll need to start avoiding him. Don't know how, but I must try.

I went downstairs to get a glass of water when I heard a knock on the door. It was Uncle Chris.

"Hey, Uncle Chris. What are you doing here?"

"I'm looking for your father. Is he here?"

"No, I haven't seen him. I got here and neither mom nor dad was here. Is something wrong?"

"No. Just couldn't reach his cell. I'm sure he's fine. Have a good night, sweetheart." He kissed my forehead and left. I started to worry. What if something had happened?

So, I decided to call him. Fortunately, he picked up.

"Dad, where are you?"

"Oh, honey, I forgot to tell you. Your mom and I will be out for the rest of the week. We left some money on the first drawer of the right side of the kitchen island and if you want you can stay with your uncle."

"But Uncle Chris came by and he didn't know where you were. Does he know you left?"

"Oh, I forgot to call him. I'll do that right now. Goodnight, munchkin, go to sleep."

"Goodnight, dad. Love you."

"Love you too." I hung up the phone and went upstairs completely forgetting about the glass of water I went to drink.

My phone buzzed and I looked at the caller ID signaling that Isaac was calling.

"Hey, Isaac."

"Hey, (Y/N). Um, do you think you can pick me up?" Isaac said in between short pants.

"Sure, where are you?" I asked. He told me where he was, and I took the keys to my mother's car to look for Isaac. He looked scared and frantic when I neared the spot, he told me about. His physique also looked different. Usually, he would walk cowering but now he stood tall and seemed a bit more buff. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just, um, do you think I could stay with you tonight?"

"I guess." I started driving to my house. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, totally. Just tired." I took the hint. He didn't want to talk, and I wasn't going to press on.

At my house, I arranged the guest room and got him spare clothes to change into. He thanked me and left for the bathroom. Something was wrong. But what?

***

Three days had passed.

Three days that I had stayed in my house for my daily workout.

Three days that my phone had been buzzing with messages from Derek asking where I was.

Because three nights before I had decided to avoid Derek at all costs.

The only way to leave it all behind is if you don't associate yourself with anyone. That way you won't feel any remorse or pain once you disappear. One time when I left was when I was approximately six or seven years old, and I had to say goodbye to Allison since we were sharing a room at that time. The second time was when I had to leave Josie. After that, I started familiarizing myself with the feeling of loneliness. It wasn't that bad once you remembered the fact that you would always see your parents when you got home, and everything would be better. Although, these days I had housed Isaac in my house, rare was the occasion that we interacted other than doing homework. Isaac would come home late in the night and quickly went to sleep. But, he stayed in my spare room for two nights and told me he had found a place to stay. He left thanking me for my hospitality.

When I finished my workout, I ran upstairs and took a shower. I changed from my stinky workout clothes to a plain white shirt and black jeans, obviously paired with my leather jacket. Once dressed I went downstairs and grabbed some cash to buy myself a muffin and a big coffee. Finally, I found the keys to my beautiful matte black Harley Fat Bob. My father had gotten me this motorcycle about two years back when he noticed I just kept crashing cars. The only thing I never crashed was his motorcycle and because he was worried I would, he bought me my own. I tend to wreck a lot of stuff. It's not intentional, I'm just clumsy at times.

I opened the door to the garage and noticed it sitting in a corner covered by a blanket. Once I took it off, I smiled. I passed my hand over the beautiful color, the smooth surface, the cold metal. It all felt familiar. A part of me. I grabbed my helmet and got on it. Once I sat my body felt relaxed, at ease. A spark of adrenaline was shot through my body when the engine came to life.

I backed up from the garage and went to the local café store. While waiting to pick up my order I noticed Derek walking in with his jogging clothes on. He still hasn't noticed me, too busy looking at the menu. When my name was called, he looked at me and called my name, but I ran out of the café with my order ignoring him.

When I got to the school everyone was staring at me. The new chick was now badass. I walked in with my backpack slung over my shoulder easing towards my locker.

"Hey there, gorgeous." I closed the locker door to see Jackson standing next to me. I rolled my eyes.

"Hi, Jackson. What do you want?"

"I was just wondering when you were free."

"Oh, well from tomorrow to never gonna happen. Get down from the cloud, buddy."

"Oh, come on, we both know you want some of this." He motioned over his body.

"Get over yourself." I scoffed.

"Babe, it doesn't hurt to try."

"I believe she's not interested, Jackson." A strawberry blonde girl appeared. Her confidence struck me like lightning, a very apparent aura of dominance radiating from within her.

"Why don't you mind your own business, Lydia. I'm talking to her, not you. You've already ruined everything else."

"Well, I think she has no business with you so why don't you scram?" With a huff and a puff, Jackson finally gave in and I turned to greet my hero, who was surprisingly accompanied by Allison.

"Thank you, so much. He wouldn't take no for an answer."

"No problem. I'm Lydia, but you knew that."

"(Y/N). Argent." She motioned between Allison and me. "Cousins."

"Pleasure." Then the bell rang. "Guess I have a new best friend, (Y/N)." You guessed wrong.

I entered Mr. Harris' classroom and sat down next to Isaac and as usual Mr. Chatty Pants tried to hold a conversation from the table behind us. Seriously, how much can someone talk? I took out my notebook and started writing down everything the teacher was saying is the homework on the board. Stiles had finally gotten the hint and didn't talk to me the whole class. That was a relief. Maybe it was due to the fact he was too focused on the strawberry blonde who had saved my ass from Jackson.

The day went on quite smoothly except at lunch. It wasn't the same Erica that had fallen from the rock-climbing wall. She completely changed; a more confident walk, she was wearing makeup and tight-fitted clothing, and her hair was perfectly styled. She left the lunchroom after taking a bite off an apple seductively and Scott and Stiles followed, as did I. Curiosity had taken the best of me as to this overnight transformation.

She opened the front doors to the school and there he was. Derek Hale in his black Camaro with the biggest smirk on his face staring at Scott. When he directed his sight to me his smirk kind of fell but was brought up quickly. During that Erica had gotten inside the car and they left, together. I don't know why I was jealous because he meant nothing to me, but it broke my heart. I got nervous. I think Scott noticed because he looked at me worried.

"Are you okay, (Y/N)?" I nodded rapidly and out of breath. I had no idea what was happening.

"I think you're having a panic attack." Stiles pointed out handing me an inhaler.

"I used to have panic attacks, too." I inhaled a pump and my breathing seemed to normalize. "You okay now?"

"Yeah. Thanks." I handed him the inhaler.

"No, keep it. I don't need it anymore." I said a low thanks and walked back to school to head to my next class.

I felt extremely weird the rest of the day. Why did I feel that way when I saw Erica and Derek together? It wasn't like anything was going on between us. Also, he's far too old for me. Or maybe I'm too young. I don't know. But I couldn't shake off that sour taste of jealousy that the image of them left.

I knew I wanted to stay as far away as I could from hin but at this moment there was nothing more that I wanted than to be close to him.

Tag: @lokisgoddesofpower

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A/N: Please check out my last post about the fandoms I’ll be writing for.

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flooffybits · 3 years

Text

Heartbreaker

Idol: Choi Jisu (Itzy)

Being the messenger was always taxing, but somehow being the messenger got Jisu a package that she wasn’t expecting.

A/n: hello! first of all i don’t fully know much about skz so i apologize if this is inaccurate. also please thank our discord mallows for helping me create this little crack/fluff fic

☕buy me a coffee☕

"Hey, did you see the new girl on campus?"

Both people at the table looked up when the male had asked the question as he walked over, looking a little more chipper than usual before the pair shook their heads.

"My classes don't start until one, so I just got here a few minutes ago to study with Lia." The blond male replied while looking back at his notes. "She's in my literature class, really cute and creative." The brunette stated, earning a light roll of the eyes from the only female. "If she is new, I expect you to at least be friendly before you try anything, Jisung." She stated, putting her pen down and then resting her chin on her hand.

The boy huffed while taking a seat, though his mood doesn’t waver as he goes on. “I think you guys might see her in some classes? I’m not sure, but her name is Y/n.” Jisung explains and the pair look at him in defeat, knowing that he would go on until he finished. “She isn’t exactly eye catching, but I got to sit in front of her and thought that it would be nice to introduce myself to her.”

“That’s nice of you to do. How is she?” Jisu hummed, a little more interested to know since she’s sure that she’s heard the name somewhere before. “She’s really nice! A little timid since she said she isn’t too confident in her Korean.”

“Foreigner?” Hyunjin cocked his head and Jisung nodded in confirmation. “She’s been living here for two years. She only has her dad and I didn’t try asking about her mom since I didn’t want to make her uncomfortable.” He added with his brows furrowed slightly and his friends can't help smiling at his thoughtfulness. “I’m sure she’s a nice girl.” Hyunjin grinned while patting his back and the other nodded happily.

“She is! I promise, you’re gonna love her if you meet her.”

And true to Jisung’s words, Hyunjin did meet you for his afternoon classes and was quick to pay attention when he found out who you were. He quickly understood your shyness and offered to be a friendly face in the sea of strangers.

“I was honestly a little surprised by you. Everyone else didn’t seem to want to bother with the new student.” You mention and the male shrugs his shoulders. “You seemed like you needed a friend, and Jisung happened to mention you when we were having lunch earlier.” He notices the way your expression brightens at the mention of his friend’s name and something doesn’t sit too well with him as he shifts in his seat.

“You’re friends with Jisung?” You ask and he nodded his head with a smile. “Yeah. We’re basically brothers. And we also have another friend, her name is Jisu, but most times we call her Lia.” He explained and you hum while nodding your head. “Choi Jisu?”

Hyunjin seemed a little surprised by your question, but he nodded either way before asking. “How do you know her?” You tap your pen against your notebook and rest your head against your other hand. “She’s my dorm mate, though I haven’t actually met her yet since I had a lot of stuff to deal with.” You explain sheepishly and Hyunjin gives you a cute little smile. "You're gonna love her."

"You're both being weird." Jisu comments while she writes down the answer for the problem she had been dealing with for the past few minutes.

Yet neither of her friends listen as they continue their little debate. "I'm telling you, the fair is the best way to welcome Y/n here!" But Jisung shook his head while scrolling through his phone. "A fair is too much! We don't want to overwhelm her." He argues and Hyunjin groans. "She'll have more fun at a fair than some museum."

Jisu had just been quietly listening to the pair go on while she did her homework, seeing that telling them to just ask you would only fall upon deaf ears, but she is surprised when her name comes falling from both their lips and she had to look up.

"What?"

"She's your roommate. You have a better idea of what she's like." Hyunjin tells her. "And you're both girls, so you have a better sense of what a girl likes." Jisung adds, his eyes almost pleading for the girl to side with him that she can't help but playfully roll her eyes. "We've talked, but we only really know the basics of each other."

"But you have a good judge of character." Jisu groans before resting her chin against her hand, looking thoughtful. "Well, I think she'd enjoy either. But if you want, I can ask her once we're at the dorm and then I'll text you?" She offers and the pair brighten up at her suggestion before nodding their heads that it makes her laugh a bit.

"You guys are so weird."

But she has no plans of replacing her friends no matter how weird they are.

"Hey, welcome back!" Jisu's surprised when she opens the door, still unaccustomed with having a roommate after getting used to being on her own for a while, but she figures it's a nice change.

"Hey, you're early today." She answers while setting her keys on the counter and you flash her a small grin. "My last class was canceled for today. My professor had an emergency at home, I think." You explain while leaning against the couch, laptop left open on the coffee table in front of you.

Jisu nods before moving to grab a bottle of water and then goes to sit down, leaving her bag hanging behind her chair. "Hey, are you going to be busy this weekend?" She suddenly asked, catching you a bit off guard since, to be honest, you weren't really expecting a question like that from your roommate. But you shake your head to answer her question.

"Well, not really. I was just planning on finishing up some of my homework and then familiarizing myself with the campus." You reply honestly while shrugging your shoulders.

There wasn't really much, plus this was a completely foreign area. You needed to know your way around and also look for the places you could, hopefully, use as a hangout place just so you didn't have to always stay in your dorm room like a hermit.

"You should join us, then." Jisu perked up, her smile only growing as you looked skeptical. "Hyunjin, Jisung and I are trying to decide whether we should go to the fair or a museum." She finally says, mentally patting herself on the back as she smoothly put the question out. "Though, which would you prefer to go to?"

You are pleasantly surprised, both by the offer and the way she's even taking your opinion into account, but something you've noted from your new dorm mate is that she's incredibly kind and thoughtful. It was no wonder she was friends with the other two. But you also didn't want to impose especially since the group didn't even know you.

"I mean, I wouldn't mind going to either, but I wouldn't want to suddenly tag along and ruin your guys' fun." You tell her and Jisu chuckles while shaking her head. "It's fine! They actually asked me to talk to you, since I thought you might not have many people to hang out with yet."

"Are you sure?" You ask her, hesitant, and Jisu giggles as she reaches for your hand to give it a light pat. "I promise, we'll be there for you."

There's something about her assurance that makes you feel warm. Her eyes disappear as her smile grows just a tad bit wider and you can't help but giggle at how cute she looks.

"Well, okay then. But where would you like to go though?" You return the question to her and this time, the tables have turned and Jisu wasn't quite sure what to answer, so she stutters out the first thing that comes to mind and she swears that she's a little bit stunned by the grin you shoot her way.

"Well, an aquarium is a little similar to a museum." Jisung commented while he looked up at the signs and Hyunjin pouted slightly, though wiped it away when he remembered that he would be seeing you in a little while. "It isn't the fair but the animals are kinda cute." He states while peering into one of the glass containers, giggling at the little jellyfish that floats by.

Both boys were a little disappointed that neither of their suggestions were picked, but seeing as they would be spending time with you, it was a fine decision. Plus, they did say they would go with whatever you would pick.

"Sorry for the wait! Y/n wanted to see some places on campus and we kinda lost track of time." Jisu apologizes when the two of you finally spot the pair and approach them with timid smiles on your faces.

Hyunjin shakes his head while shoving his hands in his pockets. "It's fine! Though, I hope you found whatever it was you were looking for?" He cocks his head to the side along with the question and you giggle at the adorable look on his face. "Yup! I had a great tour guide."

Jisu blushes in embarrassment while lightly smacking your arm. "Shut up. I only made sure you didn't get lost." She retorts, but you laugh nonetheless as she huffs at you and Jisung is happy that you're at least getting along with their little group.

"Well, how about we pick buddies so we don't get lost here?" He suggests coolly and Hyunjin shoots him a tiny glare when he realizes what his best friend is up to. Jisu can only really shake her head while you were none the wiser as you happily agreed.

"Great! Since you already spent the morning with Lia, how about we be buddies?" Hyunjin quickly asks before the other could even open his mouth and Jisung quickly pouts at you. "Hey, I should be Y/n's buddy. I befriended her first." He complained and Hyunjin turned his eyes to the brunette with furrowed brows. "What are you? Six? We'll still be a group." He retorted and Jisu had to bite her lip to stop herself from laughing at their childish antics.

You just found the whole exchange entertaining, especially when Jisung turned to the female beside you. "Back me up here. We're twins, right?" Hyunjin looked baffled by the sudden attack before crossing his arms. "Since when the hell were you twins?"

"Ever since we were born!"

"She's older than you!"

"Unless you guys have come to an agreement." Jisu cut in on the pair's bickering. "Y/n and I are gonna go ahead." She announces and you giggle while waving with your free hand while your other arm is looped with Jisu's. "Don't get lost!" You called as you both walked away with hushed giggles before the boys quickly snapped their mouths shut.

They shot each other a glare before quickly following the two of you.

"This is your fault." Jisung groaned and the latter scoffed. "I was just being friendly." Hyunjin retorted as he pouted at the seals when they swam in his line of sight. "You did say it would be nice getting to know her." Jisung frowned while scuffing his shoe against the floor. "Yeah, but I wanted to hang out with her because I wanted to be closer with her."

The admission caused Hyunjin to stop in his tracks before he slowly turned to his friend, a slightly guilty look overcoming his own features as he let out a sigh. "Looks like we really do have a lot of things in common." He chuckled, unamused, before shaking his head at Jisung's puzzled face.

"I think… I like her." He says slowly, watching as his friend’s eyes widened before pursing his lips. “And it’s clear that you feel something for her, too.” Jisung frowned at that before he looked to the ground, contemplating on what to say before he looked back up to meet Hyunjin’s eyes with determination in his own. “Then we’ll both do what we can and let her choose. But whatever happens, we don’t let it ruin us.”

Hyunjin blinked slightly in surprise, but a smile eventually came to his features before he clasped the outstretched hand in front of him with his own, laughing a bit as he nodded in agreement. “May the best man win.”

When the pair find you and Jisu happily marveling at the seal’s section in the aquarium, your laughter fills the slightly crowded area while you both watch the seal wave at its audience before swimming away, only to be replaced by another playful one.

“You guys look like you’re enjoying yourselves.” Jisung comments with a smile and the two of you look back at the two boys. “Well, we are on a trip. And it’s nice to see you’re both still alive.” Jisu shoots back playfully, drawing another giggle from you. “Had fun?” You ask the duo and they look at each other before nodding. “Yep! But you guys ditched us.” Jisung pouts and Jisu can’t help but cringe while you smile lightly.

“Sorry, but you were too slow.” You tease while reaching to pinch his cheek and the male pouts more while playfully pushing your hand away, though he does make sure not to let go of it when you lower your hand and your other two friends raise a brow at his subtle action.

“You stole Lia away and left us for dead, how could you?” He whined while shaking your hand and you giggled at his reaction before patting his arm. “You guys are more than capable of dealing with a crowd like this, so I didn’t leave you for dead.”

“Anyway.” Jisu watches as her two friends seem to grow a sudden sense of competition but keeps her mouth shut even as Hyunjin slings an arm around your shoulders, gently pulling you away from Jisung’s grasp and successfully detaching your linked hands. “How about we grab something to eat? My feet are kinda tired and I’m hungry.”

It looked like that was something you could all agree on. Despite the fun that you all had walking around, none of you could deny that you were getting a bit hungry from all the excitement.

With his arm still around you, Hyunjin began leading your little group towards the area where food stalls were lined up, many friends and families loitering around as they seemed to be in the same predicament as you.

“So, what are you two up to, this time?” Jisu asks plainly without even bothering to look at the male walking beside her. She didn’t even have to look at him to know that he was sulking. “We’re trying to woo her.” He mumbled quietly and Jisu’s brows raised at his words before she shook her head.

“You guys are ridiculous, I swear.”

“Lia, can you give this to Y/n when you get back to your dorm?” Staring at the box in front of her, Jisu soon looked questioningly at her friend. Hyunjin smiled sheepishly as he rubbed the back of his neck. “She’s been busy with a project so I wanted to do something nice. She also mentioned that she liked these cookies so I thought it would at least cheer her up.” He explained while the female took the box and placed them on top of her books. “You didn’t think of just dropping by and handing them over, yourself?” She inquired and the male fiddled with the strap of his bag. “I didn’t want to be too much of a distraction.”

When he checks the time, he flashes her a smile. “My class is about to start, but I’ll see you later. Tell Y/n I said hi.” Jisu waved to the boy as he jogged off to a different building and it didn't take long before another person plopped down in front of her .

Honestly, Jisu was getting a little tired of her friends’ childishness because this had been going on for a good month and a half. Frankly? She was done playing their messenger.

But for the sake of their pride, she went along with it. She also wanted to see how long until they give up.

"What do you want me to hand over?" She asks, uninterested, and Jisung grins at her before handing the girl a stuffed animal, plus two drinks, making the girl look confused as she looks over the items.

"One is for you. I know that it gets tiring, but I also wanted to show you how much I appreciate it that you're doing this for Hyunjin and I." Jisung explains and Jisu softens slightly before she gives the boy a nudge. "You guys are stupid, do you know that?"

But even with her words, Jisung could feel the affection as he reached to give her a hug. "Just be careful with the plushie. I had no idea where to find it in the first place, but it's one of Y/n's favorite characters." He added, making Jisu look back down and nod her head. "Yeah, I know."

"Roommate, right." He remembers before finally pulling back. "But anyway, I hope you enjoy it. Also, tell Y/n not to stress herself too much on her project. Make sure she's eating, too." He reminds and Jisu swears it feels like he's scolding her, too, because they all knew she had a tendency of forgetting to eat whenever she was too absorbed with her studies.

"You're sounding like a father." Jisu teased, laughing as Jisung shot her a playful glare. "Oh, shut up." He smiles before shaking his head and standing up. "Anyway, I have to get going. I promised Chan that I would help him with something, so I'll see you later."

When she's alone, Jisu lets out a small sigh before turning back to the gifts that she was once more tasked to deliver before huffing. Stuffing her things in her bag, she grabbed the box of cookies with one hand, plushie tucked under her arm, while the other grabbed the drinks.

"Unnie, you're a little late today." A short haired woman spoke up once Jisu entered the dorm building and stepped onto her floor.

Said girl smiled and shrugged her shoulders as the younger girl moved to help her carry the things she was holding. "Thank you." She muttered when she was relieved of the bit of extra weight. "Hyunjin and Jisung are busy and I have to study for a test, too." She replies while shaking her head as the other looked down at the things she had taken from her hands.

“Don’t even start, Ryujin.” Said girl merely raised her other hand in defense, looking amused. “I wasn’t even saying anything.” The younger girl defended, though the smirk on her face was already enough for Jisu to know what she wanted to tell her. "They'll get over it."

"You're hoping it's sooner than later." Ryujin quips when they walk over to her dorm room and Jisu frowns. "Okay, I admit it's exhausting, but they're happy at least. And I know that they aren't doing anything to jeopardize their friendship." She uses the same excuse, but Ryujin gives her a knowing look. "Feelings eventually grow or fade, unnie. If it's the former, her picking one is only going to make things worse no matter how much they say they're fine with it."

Jisu swears that she tries not to think of that, but in the very back of her mind, she knows it's true because she came to the same conclusion. If you decided to pick either of the two, the other would obviously be heartbroken and whatever would happen to their small group, she wasn't sure how she would deal with it.

"If they aren't ready to talk about it, maybe give Y/n unnie a little nudge and see who she likes more. Then go from there."

Jisu contemplates over the younger girl’s words for a good hour. She left your gifts on the table like usual while her own drink sat on the table situated beside her bed as she stared up at the ceiling.

"Hey." Your voice breaks through her thoughts, eyes squinting behind your glasses and Jisu forces herself to sit up and face you as you open the door a little wider. "I was calling you, but you weren't answering."

She can see the hesitance on your features, but the more she studies you, she realizes that she's gotten so used to seeing you in just a plain tee, comfortable shorts, and those cute little glasses that you wear only in the comfort of your dorm.

"Sorry, I was a little lost in thought." Her voice is hushed and you can't help but frown before padding over to the bed. Jisu scoots over to give you space to sit before she feels the bed dip slightly.

"You seem to be getting lost very frequently. Is something the matter?" You inquire and Jisu purses her lips because she isn't quite sure what to tell you.

Yes, something was bothering her. But the issue was, she wasn't sure what exactly it was.

She can see the genuine concern in your eyes and your voice pretty much gives it away. And as much as this wasn't anything new to her, it made her feel just a tad bit flattered.

"Do you…" She pauses and the words are at the tip of her tongue. So she licks her lips slightly before letting out a breath. "Do you like anyone?"

The surprise is clear on your face. But honestly, at that moment, Jisu was terrified to know the truth when she saw the way your cheeks flushed a bright red, obviously not expecting such a question.

However she isn't sure why she's dreading to hear one of her friends' names come spilling from your lips.

"Well, I…" You fiddle with your fingers, toying with the little ring wrapped around your right index finger, a gift she had given to solidify your friendship right after the aquarium hangout.

"I'm figuring it out."

"You seem chipper today." Jisu looks beside her to see Yeji giving her an odd look. The older girl cocked her head to the side, but Jisu just smiled while shrugging her shoulders. "What? Can't I enjoy class for once?" She rebuttals and Yeji seemed even more surprised by her response.

"What did my brother promise you?" She prods and Jisu nearly rolled her eyes before giving her sit mate a light smack on the arm. "He didn't promise me anything. I'm just in a good mood."

"You having a good mood in Philosophy is a sign of the apocalypse."

"Shut up."

Even when the lecture started and time continued to tick by, Yeji kept glancing at her friend, whose smile refused to leave her face.

"You're starting to freak me out here, Lia." She whispers and said girl let out a huff. "Pay attention." But the latter had other plans she opted to go through with. "Come on, I thought we were friends."

Jisu felt the corners of her lips twitch at the latter's whining before she gave her friend a playful push. "I'll tell you later. For now, just pay attention."

Yeji was just about to continue whining, however the professor turned in their direction at the exact moment and she stiffened in her seat, making Jisu duck her head to hide her silent laughter.

Right as their class ended, Yeji was quick to hop to her feet and begin shaking her friend's arm when she was trying to collect her things. "Tell me, tell me, tell me!"

It honestly felt like Yeji was younger than her most times, but then again, she did have her own moments.

"Alright. Come on, let's go."

The taller girl looked pretty confused by her words, but she followed Jisu out of the room and wasn't too surprised to see her brother and Jisung standing not too far away from them once they exited.

Hyunjin waved at his sister whilst she gave him a pout. "Lia has a secret and won't tell me yet." She complained, making the girl shake her head at her antics before glancing at her two best friends, who both eyed her curiously.

And she was lowkey scared now when she remembers the conversation she's had with you.

"What are you hiding?" Jisung asked playfully and Jisu tried to think of what to say that could possibly keep her nerves calm until a warm hand enveloped her own.

"Hi! Sorry, Yuna was asking me for tutoring lessons so we had to fix a schedule." You greet everyone with a bright smile and Jisu feels a little bit better when you direct your smile in her direction, one she happily reciprocates.

Hyunjin seemed surprised by your arrival, knowing that you didn't usually come to see any of them at this time. "I thought you used your free period in the library?" He asked and you nod your head in confirmation.

"Usually, yeah. But I did promise a certain someone that I was going to take them out." You answer with a little grin and Yeji's eyes widened in awe and realization whilst the two males seemed to pause at the sudden news.

"Really? You guys are so cute!" Yeji gushed, causing a blush to form on Jisu's cheeks while you gently tugged at her hand. "I know that break time isn't too long, so I hope you guys don't mind." You tell them, taking Jisu's bag and placing it on your own shoulder instead, raising her embarrassment as she squeezed your hand.

While the two of you waved them goodbye, Jisu flashed the two boys an apologetic stare before you began asking her how her day was.

Meanwhile, Jisung and Hyunjin blinked owlishly by the sudden events before slowly facing each other.

"A… date?" Hyunjin furrowed his brows and Yeji turned to face them. "I mean, yeah. I know Ryujin told Chaeryeong about talking to Lia, but to think that she picked her instead." She said humorously with a shake of her head.

"Wait, I thought Lia was straight!" Jisung said, flabbergasted, as he looked at the direction you had disappeared to.

Forgetting about their previous competition, both boys looked to each other before Yeji burst into laughter as she patted her twin's arm.

"You tried. But they are roommates, you don't really know what happens behind closed doors."

They swear, once you both came back from your date and you all had free period, they had a series of questions for the two of you regarding this little revelation, but they were nowhere near as angry as Jisu assumed them to be.

#girl group #girl group scenarios #girl group imagines #itzy #itzy scenarios #itzy imagines #itzy x reader #itzy lia #lia itzy #choi jisu #lia #lia imagines #lia scenarios

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creativeashproductions · 4 years

Text

Lost Time // Luke Patterson

Summary: Things changed since Sunset Curve fell apart literally as three out of four members died before a gig. Leaving a sad girl behind Luke by chance runs into the reader with someone else. Death tore the couple apart, and time can’t fix this.

Warning: Talk of death, depression, angst and fluff

Words: 2.2k

Might as well join the Julie and the Phantoms fan club!

*For the sake of the story the time frame has been altered, it takes place in the mid-2000s. Also! I tried to make the reader as generalized as I could to make sure that everyone can relate. The reader is Alex’s sister, for inclusion that can be biological, adopted, half or stepsiblings. I want to make sure all people can be the reader.

Masterlist

THIS IS FROM MY SECONDARY BLOG! REPOST!!

The 1990s was definitely some of the best years of your life watching your brother grow more comfortable in his identity. Alex had kept his sexuality secret, taking the frustration of the secret by learning how to play the drums. You would often be found curled on the chair listening to his growing talent; Alex was a great brother.

Alex found friends in three local boys Reggie, Bobby and Luke, even a little more than friends with Luke briefly. By 1991 the boys had formed a band Sunset Curve with each other and a loyal fan in you. By mid-1994 the band had a fanbase and some gigs, but playing The Orpheum was the goal.

Luke had admitted to Alex, he had feelings for you, and with a lot of encouragement from Alex, he approached you. Luke had been focused on music since his parents gave him his first guitar, so relationships weren’t even on the backburner.

“Hey.” Luke spoke, pressing a kiss to your cheek backstage, “Missed you.”

His hair tickled your skin, bringing a bright smile from the teenage boy and a deep blush from you, private time wasn’t as often as it once had been. After Luke’s fallout with his parents a few months back, he had couch surfed between Reggie and Alex’s rooms; he wasn’t allowed in yours.

“You saw me last night.”

“A monumental time.” Luke bent his bend to place a lingering kiss on your bare shoulder, his jacket having fallen down, “Three years together and a bright future ahead.”

Last night had been the third anniversary of your relationship and hopefully the previous night worrying on parents walking in, cheap dates Luke often felt guilty about. Luke knew in his bones playing The Orpheum tonight would open the door to a legendary future. A future where money wasn’t tight and he could you on dates he deemed acceptable for the love of his life.

Bobby voiced brought Sunset Curve’s lead singer back to that moment, you dropped from the stage to settle in the empty audience to watch the soundcheck. With a wink from Alex, he started making the beat to Now or Never, you beamed as they poured their souls into the song. The four were talented and made to be in a band together even if you didn’t really like Bobby.

Cringing at the awkward wink Bobby sent you turned on your converse to head to the bar for a glass of water. Thanking the bartender, you tuned out the conversation with the waitress and the band only jumping when arms wrapped around your waist.

“We’re getting street dogs.” Luke spoke, bringing your body to rest on his chest, “Do you want one?”

The thought of those street dogs honestly horrifying given they were cooked in some random guys car. The one time you tried, it had permanently tattooed the taste in your memories forever, and just remembering was vomit-inducing.

“I’ll pass.” You wrinkled your nose, turning to wrap your arms around his neck, “I don’t know how you guys like those.”

“Tradition.” Luke shrugged caressing your cheekbone with the pad of this thumb. Gazing at features he wanted to wake up to for the rest of his life, “Still down with the plan?”

“The minute I’m eighteen, we go to the nearest chapel.” You grinned playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, “I’ll be waiting Rockstar.”

Luke pressed a long passionate kiss on your lips, pulling away to jog over to Alex and Reggie waiting at the door. Bobby having declined the street dog invitation to flirt with the waitress Rose. Alex waved before the door closed. Little did you know that would be the last time you saw them alive.

1995 was the worst year of your life. 1996 was the hardest, especially with the forever reminder of your love. You wouldn’t trade 1996 for the world however, only wishing for one change.

Los Angeles, 2004

Alex, Reggie and Luke had learnt a mere few days away from that life had drastically changed forever. Firstly, the three boys had died from eating the street dogs mere hours before performing on the stage of The Orpheum. Secondly, it was no longer 1995 but instead nearly ten years had past bringing the three ghosts into 2004.

The most jarring wasn’t being able to be heard playing music with a random girl named Julie but that the most constant part of the band no longer was there. You hadn’t died that night, and Alex was pretty sure you were still alive. Luke felt lost waking up without you beside him and the deep regret of not reconciling with his parents.

It would be a week before Luke would swallow his pride enough to orb himself into his unchanged childhood home. Emily, Luke’s mom, was in the well-worn chair knitting a scarf Luke recognized as his favourite colours. Mitch was in the kitchen, putting the groceries away. It was heartbreaking being invisible to his aged parents.

“Hey, Mom.” Luke sniffled sitting on the couch nearby staring at his silent mother, “Sorry for not visiting sooner.”

Tears welled up in the boy’s eyes feeling hopeless, not being able to ease his parents’ pain, the regret and guilt bubbling to the surface.

“How is Y/N? I bet she’s living in New York of London now. We promised to travel the world together. Part of me is guilty of wishing she had eaten a street dog that night so we could be together.” Luke sobbed, wrapping his arms around his midsection reminiscing on the beautiful girl he had unwillingly left.

“Hey.” Mitch spoke, kissing his wife’s forehead. Her eyes closing in contentment.

“I wonder if you know where Reg and Alex’s parents are. Reggie’s neighbourhood was torn down who knows when. It makes me scared to see if Alex and Y/N’s parents still have their place. I don’t think so. They lost their son.”

“Hey Luke.”

Luke glanced over his shoulder to see Alex at the door, reluctant to impose of Luke’s privacy.

“Yeah.”

“We’re rehearsing.” Alex spoke, smiling as the other teenager took one more wistful look at his parents before orbing out of his house to the Molina family’s garage. Minutes later, the front door opening and feet thudding brought the noise to the Patterson home.

“Grandma!”

A four-foot blue of green and black blur covered the room in seconds nearly sprawling Mitch to the floor. Why was that 1996 year difficult? Well, ’95 was when Sunset Curve tragically died, and a stick changed your life. ’96 was spent going through the last five months of pregnancy without Luke.

October 1995

You kept your lips pressed tightly together, unable to look at the smooth, shiny mahogany rectangle surrounded by flowers. Looking up meant the reality kicking in. Funerals sucked. Especially the third funeral in the last handful of days. It was surreal thinking that one week ago you had kissed your boyfriend and hugged your brother and now they were dead. Gone. Not even a goodbye.

“Are you okay?” The broke voice asked, gaining your attention. Swollen red eyes matching yours held unimaginable pain. While the last few months had been icy with your parents, it didn’t mean losing one of their kids didn’t sting.

“I will be.” You whispered clasping your hands over the scratchy black velvet dress, one you had worn three times too many.

The sobs broke out seeing the best picture Alex had taken in his life, it encapsulated his best features; his beaming smile and kind, caring eyes. Alex was gone. Your brother was gone because he ate a bad hot dog with his friends. You would never see your boys again. Never feel Luke’s skin or share a laugh with Alex or complain about things with Reggie. You wouldn’t get to meet in the chapel with Luke wearing second hand ‘fancy’ clothing. In one night, your life changed.

It changed further seeing the two lines on the test later that night. The heartache growing. The baby you carried would never meet his uncles and his Dad. Would never hear them play or learn to play. ’95 and ’96 sucked ass.

You sighed, closing the door to follow the rambunctious ball of energy into the living room where he entertained Mitch and Emily. Some days it was difficult to stare into the green eyes he inherited from his father.

“Benjamin Lucas.” You spoke crossing your arms, meeting the gaze of the eight-year-old boy, “What did I say?”

“To not runoff.” Ben quietly replied, playing with his hands. His messy brown hair, in need of a trim, falling into his eyes, “Sorry Mom.”

“Please don’t do it again.” You gently told the little boy elated as he quickly found the toy box in the corner of the room.

Ben was loved deeply by Mitch and Emily, who had stepped up when your parents made the decision to sell your childhood home. Wanting Ben to know his paternal grandparents, you had struggled to find an apartment and job to say in the neighbourhood. Since the baby was the last part of their son, the Patterson parents’ had welcomed you into the home where you stayed until Ben was two.

“Do you want us to come around for Luke’s birthday?” You questioned sitting on the love seat, the same love seat you had made out on with Luke many times during movies.

The room turned sad at the question and reminded that for the ninth year, you would celebrate Luke’s birthday without him. A day where Ben wouldn’t fully understand. Emily simply nodded her head.

“Have you met anyone?” Mitch asked, leaning over to clasp his hands together. For the last few years, they had been pushing you to date. They wanted your happiness and for Ben to have a father even if Luke couldn’t be it.

“Mama can we stay here tonight?” Ben’s innocent voice cut the tension, saving you from answering the question again. Mitch and Emily each nodded their heads at the question, unable to tell the young boy no.

“Have you ate?” Emily asked, turning to look at you in concern. The chuckle left your mouth at the question she frequently requested, she missed cooking for more than two.

“We had pasta before we came.” You replied, turning to gaze out the window to the dark sky, “I should put Ben to bed.”

The soft whine from your son and denial was a nightly routine and very much a mirror image to Luke’s character as well. With a smile, Emily held out her hand to her grandchild, she was notoriously the only one able to get Ben to sleep fast.

“Come on Bug.”

It seemed the universe was keeping Luke from seeing you and discovering Ben, but when that night came, he was shocked. Emily was curled up on the patio couch, watching Ben in the newly bought sandbox. The patio doors opened. Inside, Mitch had invited a stranger who knew his son into the house.

“I think I heard the doorbell. I’ll be right back.” Emily called out to you. You had found shade under the tree reading a new book.

The soft cry had you up and running to Ben before you even realized, on his knee was a bleeding wound. You had already scooped the boy into your arms to quickly get into the kitchen. The moment your foot stepped into the home, the sound of a familiar voice and song filled the house.

Gently placing Ben on his feet, you followed the sound to the living room. Across the room behind a young girl stood a boy.

“Luke.” You breathed floored at the sight of the teenager who looked exactly like he did back in ’95. The ghost singing widened his eyes at yours, taking in the mature features and change of fashion.

He continued to sing the song Unsaid Emily he had written as an apology to his mom following the last big fight. The song he never got to show her. His voice faded as the ending of the song came around.

“Mama!” Your attention broke from Luke’s when a tiny hand reached for yours. The pain in his voice bringing you back to the most important part of your life, “It hurts Mama.”

Despite being sad, Mitch was the one to cross the room to lift the little boy into his arms. Placing the little boy on the counter, the man gently wet a paper towel to wash the area.

“I think he needs stitches.” Mitch sighed, furrowing his brows.

“Who is that?” Luke asked the Molina girl. The girl shrugged taking in the features she could recognize. Julie asked Emily.

“That’s Ben.” Emily beamed, looking over her shoulder at the little boy that filled the void of Luke’s death. It didn’t fix the wound or erase the pain, but Ben’s existence helped with the loss as he was a precious gift, “When Luke passed away his girlfriend Y/N found out she was pregnant with Luke’s baby.”

The choked sob fell from Luke’s mouth echoed by the thud of his knees, hitting the floor in the pure shock. The heartbreak painted so clear Julie was sure she could feel Luke’s agony.

God, why did Luke have to eat that��fucking street dog. Fuck his band dreams. Nothing hurt as bad as finding out about Ben and Y/N having to be a single parent.

“I have a son?” Luke cried, orbing himself as far as he could from the Patterson home and his most tremendous loss.

Part Two

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bonesbuckleup · 4 years

Text

Lord, this answer got long. I’m a little embarrassed about it, but I wrote it, so it’s getting posted. It’s a literal essay. Sorry but also not?

TLDR: Yes, the show is arguably unfair to Sokka about Kya, but it also follows a pattern where Sokka stays quiet about Bad Feelings and plays by the rules established for his character. Katara, meanwhile, grieves loudly and often, and appears to be under the impression that because Sokka’s grief is silent it doesn’t exist, which also fits her character/interactions completely. Neither of them are right or wrong, but it sets them up on inevitable collisions.

Now. If you want to join me on a cactus-juice fueled descent into madness, proceed below the cut.

Number one. We’re referring to this exchange in “The Southern Raiders,” where the Gaang is talking about Zuko and Katara going after the man who killed Kya, which is vicious and brutal and never reflected on:

Aang: You sound like Jet. Katara: It's not the same! Jet attacked the innocent. This man, he's a monster. Sokka: Katara, she was my mother, too, but I think Aang might be right. Katara (angry, yelling): Then you didn't love her the way I did! Sokka (visibly hurt, softly): Katara.

And that’s it. Upon returning, Katara apologizes to Aang and not, as Anon is absolutely correct in pointing out, to Sokka, who is 100% the more injured party. Now. Is it possible this is one of the rare missteps from the atla writers? Yes. Absolutely. Is that the answer I’m about to write a literal fucking essay about? No. Because it’s more painful fun to take it as face value and talk subtext.

First, a reminder that this show is fucking good at what it does. It teaches you how each character grieves as we go: Aang explodes, often triggering the Avatar state, usually crying or angry, and when he does try to repress his Bad Feelings it rarely lasts longer than a day; Toph either shuts down or gets mad, but either way she doesn’t like people seeing her having Bad Feelings and often storms away, knowing that she can’t control it no matter how much she might want to; Zuko yells at the sky in a rainstorm or yells at his dad in an underground tunnel or challenges Zhao to an Agni Kai or yells at his uncle in a jail cell and generally is an emotive nuclear bomb because the boy has feelings and if he keeps them inside for more than three seconds he might explode okay.

Then we have Katara and Sokka.

Let’s start with Katara, since she has the most textual and straightforward displays of grief. She’s really the only one to talk about Kya’s death in Book 1. If Sokka mentions it, it’s barely in passing. I don’t think we hear Hakoda address her death at all (which I’ll return to in a moment.) Katara’s grief is loud. It’s angry. It’s still very much a living thing for her. She thinks she sees Kya in the swamp and breaks down crying, and tells Aang and Sokka about it with no hesitation. When she’s angry and sad at Hakoda for leaving, she acts out and is visibly upset with him, yells at him, cries at him. She out-loud hates Zuko when she comes to the conclusion that he told her about Ursa and got her to talk about Kya to manipulate her. It isn’t that her grief is performative, because it’s a very real and terrible thing, but it’s a grief that’s to be witnessed.

Then, Sokka. Sokka’s grief is more complicated because it exists almost entirely in subtext, especially in regard to Kya. We really only hear him talk about Kya twice, both in Book 3. First, to Toph, when he tells her that he can’t remember what Kya looks like. Worth noting, however, that even though it is Sokka talking, this is still centered on Katara and Katara’s grief. The next time is when Zuko asks what happened to Kya, and Sokka tells the story that leads into the initial flashback. Sokka doesn’t talk about his mom. This is a fact of the show. It’s such a fact of the show that, in “Southern Raiders,” after the exchange at the start of this post, while Katara and Zuko are on the hunt, Sokka doesn’t bring up Kya again and is messing around with Aang. Like nothing has happened or is currently happening--which I’ll come back to in a moment.

So while we can use Kya as a perfect example of how Katara grieves, we can’t really use her for Sokka. So let’s use Yue instead. Moments we see (or don’t see) Sokka grieving Yue:

In the opening to Book 2, we briefly have a shot of Sokka with the moon imposed behind him.

“The Swamp,” where Sokka’s vision is of Yue accusing him of not protecting her. This one is one of the more textual moments of grief--”I think about Yue all the time”--but what’s awful great about it is how Sokka tells Aang and Katara. Aang, obviously, has no qualms about sharing his vision. Katara openly talks about seeing Kya. Sokka only tells them about Yue when explicitly asked. Even then, he doesn’t mention what she said to him. From this, we can assume that Sokka is still holding onto a lot of guilt over her death--guilt that he won’t let Aang and Katara see. Anyway. Moving on.

“The Serpent’s Pass.” After spending all day panic protecting Suki, he tells her that he lost someone, but doesn’t go much further into detail, just saying that he can’t when she tries to kiss him. Of course, this is all happening in front of the moon. Again, though, Sokka stays vague. He doesn’t tell her any details.

“The Puppetmaster,” Toph posits that maybe the moon spirit has gone mean and is kidnapping people. Sokka snaps at her, in a moment definitely meant for laughs, saying, “The Moon Spirit is a gentle, loving lady. She rules the sky with compassion and ... lunar goodness!” It is a funny moment, but here’s what we can take from it: Toph doesn’t know about Yue. Toph is a Feral Bastard a lot of the time, but she also knows where the line is, and I don’t think she’d’ve said that if she’d known.

“Boiling Rock,” in arguably the most quoted (and well deservedly so!) line in the entire show. “My first girlfriend turned into the moon.” “...that’s rough, buddy.” COMEDIC GOLD. Also, weirdly, the literal only time that Sokka explicitly tells someone about Yue in the course of the show.

“Ember Island Players” which I haven’t hit in my rewatch yet, but I definitely remember a moment where Suki asks Sokka when he was gonna tell her he made out with the moon, and he tearfully shushes her. Again, played for laughs, but the implication is that he still hasn’t told Suki about what happened.

This plays perfectly into the same way that Sokka (doesn’t) talks about his mom. When the Bad Feelings come, Sokka either avoids them and finds a distraction (Goofs with Aang--see, told ya we’d come back to that) or stays silent. When someone explicitly asks him about the Bad Feelings--what he saw in the swamp, what’s eating at him in “Sokka’s Master,” why he’s panic-protecting Suki--he’ll answer, but often talks around the actual issue. (Interestingly, it’s in regard to Suki we see the most explicit manifestation of Sokka grieving as Azula taunts him during the invasion: he cries, he attacks Azula, he yells and questions her despite the fact he knows she’s wasting their time. I think this one hits him because, as this beautiful post points out, Suki’s the protector in the relationship, and Sokka can actually chill out for 2 seconds. But he let his guard down, and Azula got Suki. Anyway. That’s probably a different essay: back to the matter at hand.) We even see this in “Boiling Rock.” There’s a moment where they think Hakoda is not with the other political prisoners. Sokka’s tense, drawn tight, but the only thing he says is, “No.”

Basically, we’ve got Katara, who grieves loudly and rages and is kinda like white-water rapids that churn and churn and churn. And we’ve got Sokka, who, to quote John Mulaney, looks at his grief and says, “I’ll just keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die.” Iceberg grief, to keep the water metaphor going.

And where did these come from? Yup! Water Tribe gender roles! What we know from the show is that, while the South is typically more progressive (women can train as benders and marry who they want, at least) than the North, it’s still very rigid: the men are warriors/hunters/protectors, the women stay home to cook/clean/child-rear.

Now: subtext! And why I think they are this way!

We’ll start with Katara. The last waterbender in the South Pole. She no doubt grew up doted on. If I say she’s most likely a little spoiled, I don’t mean it in a bad way--I mean it in a she’s the last living remnant of this aspect of their culture kind of way. When raiders come, she’s probably the first priority to protect. Kya dies to keep her safe. Her needs are generally put before the community as a whole. (This isn’t to say that Katara doesn’t contribute or care about her community, because she 100% does). But! Especially in Book 1, we see Katara often considering her opinions as facts (trusting Jet, the waterbending scroll) and doesn’t always pause to consider the larger impact that her actions will have (scroll and Jet again, challenging Pakku, dressing up as the Painted Lady despite the fact the factory will hold the village responsible). And many of these actions are good! But we see a lot of Katara being pretty self-centered--what can I do, how does this impact me, how do I feel about this? And this isn’t a bad thing! This aspect of her character makes her complicated and complex! Katara loves her family and protecting people and caring for them! She’s extremely empathetic! But she also struggles to meet people where they’re at when they emote in a different way than she does (see: her clashes with Toph, her initial problems with Zuko joining the group, the above interaction with Sokka). It’s also worth talking about how Katara witnessed her mother’s death, which no doubt makes her grief about it a sharper thing.

Then, again, Sokka. Also loved in his community! But a normal kind of love, I’d assume. He probably was raised on stories of the Fire Nation dragging waterbenders away. No one exemplifies the Water Tribe ride-or-die mentality quite as well as Sokka, or the gender roles of the man as the warrior/protector, so you gotta believe Hakoda raised that kid to look after his sister at all costs, which we see throughout the show (already preparing to go after Aang in the South Pole because he know Katara’s going anyway, “You burned my sister!”) And he isn’t there when his mom dies. He finds out later. He goes from feeling like a victor who helped chased the raiders away to the worst realization of his life. I have to imagine he’s ashamed by the fact that he thought everything was going to be okay, which leads into his worldview of assuming that nothing is okay ever in any circumstance.

Finally, Hakoda. Who never, unless I’ve forgotten something, talks about Kya. All we know is that their family fell apart after her death (per Sokka in “The Runaway,” learning how Katara stepped up to hold everything together) and sometime after he took the warriors and straight up left. He apologizes for leaving but doesn’t address the fact that he left Katara and Sokka with no parents at all, only the war. This is, uh, not exactly echoing a healthy coping mechanism?

My theory: Kya dies. Since the Water Tribe is so embedded in gender roles, Hakoda probably shut down and/or checked out emotionally for a while. This leaves his kids on their own to deal with their shit, and we learn Katara does everything she can to keep her family going. As the most protected individual in the South, Katara’s probably been taught that emotions equal attention, and uses her temper/caring/sadness to help bring her community closer. Meanwhile, Sokka, who hero worships his dad, watches Hakoda go stoic and learns that “real men” shove their shit down. Additionally, Katara’s grief is deafeningly loud, and Sokka’s number 1 role is to keep Katara safe. He’s taught that the Bad Feelings only get in the way and make things worse, and so he learns to be fine no matter what kind of terrible is going down around him. Basically, Katara learns to use grief as a needle and thread, and Sokka learns to bury it as deep as he can and avoid it at all costs. Opposite reactions to the same trauma. Katara gets mad and demands to be heard and listened to and seen, and Sokka gets sarcastic and prepares himself for the day the Fire Nation ships come back for his sister.

So. Back to those above lines from “Southern Raiders.”

From a writing standpoint, I do wish the final moment was between Katara and Sokka versus Katara and Aang. They could’ve had an almost identical interaction, but it would’ve been more nuanced. I don’t think that Katara needed to apologize, but I think we needed some acknowledgement from both of them: Katara continuing the lesson she’s learned about how her pain doesn’t entitle her to hurt other people (including Sokka, who is there no matter what she says or does), and Sokka that Katara’s process of grieving had to involve this catharsis.

Or. Maybe not. Because again--subtext. Their grief works in such different ways that I have to imagine this isn’t a new fight. It was probably brutal and vicious for a very long time. Maybe that’s part of what made Sokka try and go with the warriors. Maybe that’s part of why Katara gets mad so quickly in the first episode of the show. But eventually, unable to find an answer, they just...stop talking about it. Because the two of them don’t talk about it. Katara only talks about her mom with people who aren’t Sokka, and Sokka does exclusively to Toph and Zuko.

The only time I can think of Katara and Sokka talking about it together is the exchange at the top of this post, and it gets ugly fast, and it isn’t brought up again. It’s a fight that will never be resolved, because they fundamentally can’t react to one another in a way that can be universally understood.

“You didn’t love her the way I did!” Katara yells, loudly, because if Sokka loved her then why isn’t he raging? Why isn’t he getting his sword and coming to help her? Why doesn’t Sokka want to burn this firebender to the ground and make him see and hear and look at what he’s done to the world? To their family? He must not understand. He must not care as much or he’d be screaming with her.

“Katara,” Sokka says, much quieter, and adds nothing else. Not because there isn’t anything else to say, but because Sokka can’t talk about this kind of thing. Not doesn’t want to, but can’t, because it’s his job to protect people, protect Katara, and if he lets all those old hurts come boiling up he can’t do that, because that ends with losing focus and losing control and people getting hurt or going away. Why can’t she understand that?

And then they do what they always do. They don’t bring it up again.

#LITERAL ESSAY BY TUMBLR USER BONESBUCKLEUP #Sokka #Katara #atla #this is what isolation has done to me #this is the nerdiest bullshit that I've spewed in a while #felt good though #writing's been hard recently #I'm working myself back into it through atla shitposts and meta #long post #If I could harness this energy into something other than fandom I might rule a small country by now?#oh well

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hobidreams · 4 years

Text

october 1865.

you never thought you would smile like this again, but here you are. and here he is, by your side.

pairing: joseon king!yoongi x reader genre: fluffy fluff words: 5k 😳 contains: historical au, chuseok date!, eunuch kim!, so much cuteness, guest appearances hehe

moonlit throne index. this is drabble 13. start from the beginning?

“How do I look, mom?”

Standing before the mirror, you nervously smooth the delicate sash of the pink hanbok for the hundredth time, careful not to lean down too much and dislocate the floral ornament carefully pinned in your hair. There have been doves fluttering in your stomach the entire afternoon; you don’t know if you tied this correctly or if your hair is braided right, and you can’t ask any of your nearby neighbours for fear of discovery that your plans are different than theirs tonight. Mother would know exactly what to do and what to say to make you feel at ease. But want you want most is for her to see you all grown up like this. Finally able to properly wear the outfit you coveted for so long, and hold your head high in it too. You think she’d be proud.

You manage a smile as you run your fingertips along the edge of the ornament, a gift from mother on your twelfth birthday. It’s almost been a year since her passing, and you still miss her more than anything. But you also know now that the best way to honor her is to be happy, and to carry on her work, her legacy. So far, you’ve begrudgingly won a few scraps of respect from the male physicians, and it’s a start.

“I hope you’re doing well up there,” you say, letting your gaze drift out the window to the beaming Chuseok moon, hoping the wind might take your words and your love all the way to her.

“Hey. Are you ready?”

You are grateful that the door is closed because the way you snap to attention is frankly embarrassing.

"Yes, just a moment, seja-jeonha!" you say in a nervous half-whisper, half-exclamation as you allow yourself one last glimpse at the mirror. This is going to be fine. You're going to be relaxed and have a good time, even if you are sneaking out of the palace with arguably the second most important person in the country.

Putting on a smile that hopefully looks effortless, you pull open the door and practically gasp out loud at the sight of him.

It's perhaps the first time you've seen the prince out of the traditional royal robes. It's an excellent disguise -- the clothes of a young yangban lord, done in a deep-dyed scarlet that contrasts his usual navy. A cinched belt fastens the coat deftly, juxtaposed against the dragging, silky sleeves beside it, making him seem somehow more elegant in the way he holds himself. Completing the look is the gat that sits atop his head, its wide-brim tilted low so it covers enough of his face that he wouldn't be recognized, at least not to anyone who spared him a passing glance (not that they would know his face to begin with). The gat strap hangs low in front of his chest, the intricate beading betraying just how truly expensive this hat is. He is, in short, unfairly, unfathomably handsome.

You are forever grateful that you chose to dress up; if nothing else, at least you will look suitable standing next to him, at least for a night.

If Yoongi thinks anything of your outfit, he covers it with a slight cough, his cheeks faintly reddened from the cold. “Good. Come on. We have to be quick.”

You nod, following him out into the night air.

With swift steps and strategic maneuvering, it doesn't take you long to reach one side of the imposing wall that separates palace from town. There, you find a familiar face waiting for you.

"Good evening," Eunuch Kim says with a bow. He’s wearing a different, muted set of green robes and donned a gat as well. “As you instructed, the select guards have been informed to keep quiet, and all else has been taken care of. Let us go."

He likely insisted on coming, as one of the caveats for your illicit excursion. You don't mind, since this isn't the first time he's had to do such a thing, always so worried about his rebellious, stubborn charge. You watch as he lets Yoongi go past first, then gestures for you.

“You look lovely tonight, uinyeo-nim,” Eunuch Kim says, and you share a small, furtive smile that feels like he’s cheering you on. Then you step past the official gates, feeling so acutely the pattering of your pulse because this is truly happening.

For the first handful of minutes, you remain both terrified and anticipatory that you'll be snatched back by the royal guard and accused of kidnapping the prince or something equally ridiculous as being on an actual outing with him. Beside you, Yoongi doesn't seem to have these worries as he walks by your side (though still a respectful, proper distance apart), letting his arms slightly swing while he kicks up dust with his slippers.

Just as you're wondering if you're being an awful companion and not making conversation, he says, "haven't been outside the palace in ages."

“Me too. It's… a little strange, having all this freedom to roam and do what I want. Even if it’s just for a night.”

“I'll say.” Yoongi makes an exasperated noise. “There are too many rules in that place. Can't do anything without being watched.” He gives a minor tilt of his head towards your chaperone, though it's more a tease rather than actually spiteful. Eunuch Kim, for his own sake, pretends not to see or hear the jab.

You smile. “It's for your safety, seja-jeonha.”

“So they say. But they'll regret it when I die of boredom first.”

He rolls his eyes and you laugh, and the palpitations in your stomach ease just like that.

As you draw ever closer to the town, the harmony of string and wind instruments crescendo and build with the jubilant chatter of the townspeople. It's getting to you in the best of ways; you're becoming so elated at the prospect of the festivities that you start to speed up, soon practically rushing towards the town square at a pace that forces Yoongi and Eunuch Kim to run to follow.

"…Wow!"

At the base of the square, your entire face brightens with the wondrous sight unfolding before you. There are people everywhere. Some down celebratory alcohol, others munch on sweet treats, and more still singing along to the traditional folk tunes with robust vibrato, regardless of whether they’re on key or not. You can’t find a single frown amidst all this mirth, and that’s just the way you like it. It’s overwhelming: the sights, the sounds, and the mouthwatering smell of something delicious and fried.

Yoongi eventually jogs up to you, forced to inhale a few quick breaths to refill his lungs. “Are you that hungry?” He asks, the corner of his lips curling up.

Oh god, you just made the prince run.

"No...! Not at all! I’m deeply sorry, seja-jeonha. I got too excited, didn’t I?”

“Not at all. Shall we get something to eat first then?”

You avert your eyes, though you really haven’t had dinner tonight. “No, please. Let us do what you would like.”

Yoongi grins as if it is of no consequence. “What I want? Well, then, I want to go this way.”

As is his habit, he begins to walk in the direction he chooses without notice, though this time he has to weave through the people that crowd the area. His disguise is working well; he is largely ignored as he passes, leading your little group all the way to an open alleyway where stalls line each side, lit up with lamps and vividly colored banners.

A twinge of sadness squeezes your heart as you look at the spread. You faintly remember a decade ago that there used to be a full row of assorted delicacies and sweets for purchase; now it’s mostly merchants with tables of books and hairpins, food becoming too scarce for most to sell with the grain shortage, even if they need the funds. Still, everyone seems to be doing their best with what they’ve got.

Sudden shouts ring out right beside you, nearly blowing your ears out with how loud they are.

“Jeon! Freshly fried shrimp and fish jeon for sale!”

“Hot, hot, hot nokdujeon over here!”

“Gaah!” you exclaim, eyes wide. You wouldn’t be surprised if the monks up the mountain heard about this jeon! When you turn to see who the hell is making all this commotion, you’re met with the scowling faces of two men, glaring furiously at each other in-between tending to their sizzling pans in adjacent stalls. The bearded one looks about seconds away from giving the other younger man a good smack with the fishing rod leaning on the wall behind him.

Said younger man gives a snicker. “No wonder my sales are beating yours. Why would anyone want your shrimp when they could have my delicious mung beans?”

“Say that again, if you dare.”

“Why would anyone want your gross shrimp when—”

“Yah, you can take your beans and shove them right up your nasty sokgot—”

“Excuse me,” Yoongi cuts in between them with a smirk. “I’ll take two orders of each. Preferably not ones shoved anywhere.” He drops coins on both counters, more than enough to cover the food.

“Ahem.” They levy two very similar glares at each other before beginning to package the orders for consumption, switching to polite honorifics in the process. “Yes, sir!”

“Right away, sir!”

They work deftly, obviously very practiced in the art. Neither of them drop so much as a crumb, even though they seem to be racing.

"My lord, here is your order," Fish Jeon says, only to be roughly shoved aside by Mung Bean in a rush to hand over the goods first.

"Please enjoy, sir!"

Yoongi takes the round and crispy nokdujeon, all wrapped in parchment paper. His amused chuckling makes you feel a little warmer, a bit fonder than you should. Especially when he then promptly passes the package to you.

"Seja--" You cut yourself off before you make the mistake. "Um. My lord, this is for me?" You ask, even though you're practically drooling at the scent.

"Did I give it to someone else? Eat."

He turns, hands off one of the assorted jeon plates to Eunuch Kim behind him, who accepts gratefully with a bow.

You, and your stomach, don’t need to be told twice. After blowing on the golden batter, you take a generous bite, accidentally smearing a bit of it on your cheek in the process but god, it tastes incredible. Mung Bean may be loud, but he clearly doesn’t tell lies. You have to hold yourself back from inhaling the pancake whole, instead savoring each nibble on your tongue.

“Come on. Keep going before the crowd grows,” Yoongi says, urging you forward with a jerk of his chin before biting into his own pancake. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him smile this much before, and it’s with slight regret that you tear your eyes away to look where you’re going.

From behind you as you start to walk, you hear, "Jungkook, you brat, shouldn't you be more respectful to your elders?!"

"Whatever, hyungnim. Nokdujeon! Better-than-his-fish nokdujeon!"

There is a very distinctive thwap as you move into the merchant area.

The first booth you come to belongs to a woman that you recognize, selling the latest romance novel by a rising author, Taehyun. She recognizes you too, waving you over with enthusiasm. “Oh, hello! We just received this last week. A tale of forbidden love between a yangban lady and a fisherman! Full of tension and…” she lowers her voice conspiratorially, “more than a few kisses!”

“Do people actually read things like this?” Yoongi mutters, staring at the covers.

“Huh? No! Well, hah, I certainly don’t!” You hope your face looks plausibly innocent. “But thank you,” you turn to say to the woman before hurriedly walking on before she can expose your ruse. The prince doesn’t need to know about the precious books you keep in a secret stash in your room. A lady can’t only study all day, right?

(You make a mental note to come back to town and pick up a copy later.)

Down the row you go, reluctantly finishing off the pancake on the way. Yoongi hands you the entire second plate of jeon not long after. “I don’t want it,” he says, watching you brighten at the prospect of more food. He does end up stealing a piece of shrimp from within your grasp later, throwing it casually into his mouth before you can even react.

The next display to really catch your attention is one laden with delicately handcrafted ornaments, pins, bracelets, and perfumes. “Wow!” You gush, leaning over the table as you try to calculate how much money you brought with you because you want it all, even though you rarely have the occasion to dress up. Still, you want at least something as a keepsake, to hold your memories of this precious day. Yoongi stops and waits for you; you forget it should be the other way around.

“Oh my, Eun-a-ssi? Is that you?”

What? You look up, breath hitched.

“Oh, my apologies.” The woman behind the booth is elderly, her hair grey, eyes wrinkling warmly as she smiles. “My mistake. My eyesight isn’t what it was. You… look a lot like a woman I know. I haven’t seen her in a long time now.”

“Eun-a… Eun-a was my mother,” you murmur. “She passed away last year.”

The woman’s eyes widen as she clutches her hands to her chest. “She did? Oh… Oh no… I’m so sorry, child. Then you must be—” She thinks for a moment, then says your name. You nod, and a small smile slips back on her lips, though now tinged with sadness. You know the feeling. “My name is Hong Sook-ja. I used to live right here in town with Eun-a-ssi, until all those years ago when she moved into the palace and I moved to the countryside. Your mother used to bring you into town for Chuseok and we got to know each other then. These days, I just come back every once in a while to see my granddaughter and great-grandson, so I must have missed the news.”

“It’s alright, Sook-ja-ssi. Mom lived well,” you say, ignoring the twinge in your chest. Any glimpse into mother’s life before she had you fills you with a certain homesickness, alongside the joy. “She was happy. And I’m sure she’d be happy to know that you are living well too.”

“Good. Good. She deserved happiness.” Sook-ja sighs, letting the information sink in. Only after one last kind smile does she finally seem to notice Yoongi standing beside you, trying his best not to intrude. “Now, is this handsome lord your companion? Perhaps your betrothed?”

“N-No!” You immediately cry, not wanting Yoongi to misunderstand, to think that his rank could be dragged so low as to match yours. Sook-ja should know that these class lines, even between yangban and cheonmin, are not so easily crossed. But the mischief in her gaze seems to suggest she doesn’t care much about that. “No, we’re just out. Together.”

“Yes. Out. Together,” Yoongi echoes, just as the door behind Sook-ja starts to open with a noisy creak.

A young woman dressed in a pretty hanbok steps out of the house with a smile. “Grandma, are you interrogating the customers again… Oh, hey! Kim-nim!”

All three of you turn your heads to look at Eunuch Kim, who couldn’t look more surprised at the woman’s appearance if Yoongi started growing a tail. He flusters, stepping back as if that could protect him. “Ahh, Chun-ja-ssi…! You’re, um, here! And you look, wow—” He almost drops the last piece of jeon altogether. “I was not expecting you to be here— I mean, not that I was thinking of you being elsewhere— Uh, not that I think about you that often—”

“This is my granddaughter,” Sook-ja explains, saving the poor man. “Chun-ja. She and her son, Han-jae, are the best parts of my life. She’s so clever, she can even read and write, you know!”

Chun-ja flushes under the praise. “My grandmother likes to exaggerate. But it’s very nice to meet you both,” she says, bowing in greeting as Sook-ja excuses herself, exiting through the same door.

Yoongi is once again smirking. “So, how do you know Kim-nim?”

“Mm, it was about two years ago? I was helping one of the merchants bring grain into the palace. Kim-nim saw me struggling with a particularly heavy pot, and so he helped me carry it. Since then, we chat for a bit every time he’s in town on an errand, and exchange the occasional letter! When he remembers to write me back, that is. Though his letters are often so lovely that I don’t mind the wait.” Chun-ja offers Eunuch Kim a grin that he can’t quite return with ease.

Yoongi has to work hard to keep his face relatively straight as he says, “hmm. So that is why he’s always disappearing from the palace with those weak excuses? And using all that ink? He always said it was for something important.”

“Seja— My lord! Please!” Spare me, Eunuch Kim’s wilted expression pleads. You have to hide your amusement behind a hand, lest you burst out with inappropriate laughter.

Once again, Sook-ja comes to the rescue as she shuffles out of the house, holding two familiar objects that make your eyes light up. “You’re both in luck. I knew we had a few extra this year, even after that rascal great-grandson of mine ruined a few with his roughhousing. He’d still be causing trouble if he weren’t off with his friends right now.” Sook-ja sighs. “I wish my grandson were still around to scold him. But anyway, I’d be happy if you’d take them!”

“Wish lanterns!” You exclaim, taking the lightly orange cloth contraption with glee. “Oh, I haven’t seen these up close in years.” The palace celebrations don’t usually include them, leaving you to try and catch the sight of the tiny, almost imperceptible lights floating into the sky from so far away. You’ve always loved the thought of the lamps surging towards that boundless sky, endlessly drifting, free to follow the wind.

“Do you know how to start it?” Chun-ja asks. You shake your head. “Let me show you.”

As Chun-ja explains the mechanisms behind the lantern to you, Yoongi reaches for his coin pouch. “We must give you something in exchange.” Yoongi produces several mun coins that are at least five times the lanterns’ actual worth, and tries to give them to her.

Sook-ja pushes his hand away. “No, no, it’s a present!”

“I insist.” Yoongi tries again, only to be rejected, again. He wonders if she would be so obstinate if she knew who he really was. (Probably yes.) “Alright… What if I take another item from the table to make it a fair trade?”

“Stubborn, aren’t you?” Sook-ja bursts into laughter, her belly shaking beneath her skirt. “Fine. Take your pick!”

Yoongi barely scans the accessories; he snatches up the bracelet you were looking at before and tucks it into his jeogori with a secret smile. “Thank you.”

“Thank you,” Sook-ja says warmly, before her smile dips down conspiratorially. “It’ll look good on her. Anyway, have fun! Enjoy the night.”

“I’m sure we will.” Yoongi shifts his attention to you. “All done? Then let’s keep going.”

“Yes, my lord,” you say, happily clutching the lanterns. “Thank you so much, Sook-ja-ssi. Chun-ja-ssi.”

Chun-ja beams. “Our pleasure. I hope we see each other in town again soon. And Kim-nim, don’t forget your letters!”

“Yes, of course, I will. I mean, I won’t. Forget, that is. Uh, I’ll write. G-Goodbye.” Eunuch Kim bows twice in quick succession before hurrying after you two, trying his best not to look back for one last glimpse of what he’s left behind.

You continue your wandering through the rest of the festival, marveling at the sheer strength of the wrestlers and then the elegance of the dancers. Absently, you wish this atmosphere could stay in place forever, and that everything else could just vanish into the smoke and ash of the burning campfires, but you know too well that life is a balance. And right now, with the prince’s silky sleeve pressed almost right against yours as you walk past a chorus of singers, the scales have temporarily tipped in your favor.

Eventually, all your wandering takes you to almost the outskirts of town, to an area you visited before with your mother. It takes some squinting but you eventually recognize the obscure path among the bushes, and immediately gesture towards it. The prince has shown you so much tonight; you want to return the favor, especially since his steps are beginning to slow. “This way! Please come with me.”

“Are you sure this is safe?” Eunuch Kim calls. “We cannot let anything happen to our lord!”

You start down the road. “Completely!”

It’s been so long since you last took these steps, but it all comes back to you effortlessly as you take the lead. It takes a few minutes, just a few, to reach the clearing you seek. And it is exactly as you remember it — the nature growing with a wild, greedy virility, the oddly shaped rocks studded in the dirt, and the reflecting pond, its water rippling from the drag of the autumn wind across its surface. There is no one here, which is exactly how you expected it to be.

“Here it is, seja-jeonha.”

“It’s quiet,” he marvels, and steps further in. He stops at the edge of the pond, staring not down but out, at the reflection of the full moon in its depths.

“I thought that you could use a change of environment. You look a little tired.” At this point, you know him well enough to tell that the neutrality of his expression shows subtle signs of weariness.

“The noise. It can be overwhelming at times. I’m not used to so much of it, usually. But I like the songs.”

You nod. “I understand perfectly! That’s why mom took me here in the first place. It used to be her secret spot when she was growing up.”

His arms shift, sleeves brushing the sides of his jacket. “She was a kind woman.”

“Very much so.”

You feel the breeze swiftly pick up, weaving through the strands of hair that have come loose from your up-do. The curling leaves around you rustle with welcome relief, bathing in the atmosphere, the rare tranquility of such a beautiful evening.

“Shall we float the lanterns?” You suggest after a spell.

“Sure.” Yoongi indicates for Eunuch Kim to bring the lanterns over. “Matches?”

Eunuch Kim fumbles in his robes for a few seconds before he realizes with a start that they’re just not there. “My apologies!” He bows. “I must have left the matches back at the booth!”

Yoongi sighs. “Too distracted by Chun-ja-ssi, hm?” Eunuch Kim flushes. “Go get them then.”

“But to leave you alone—”

“I’m not alone.”

Eunuch Kim looks between the prince and you a few times in rapid succession, his thoughts evidently as wavering as his eyes. He finally lands back on the prince.

“…Understood. I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

You both watch him go, the quick pace of his steps no doubt brought on by anticipation.

“I can’t believe he’s been involved with a woman without any of us knowing,” Yoongi says, his tone betraying his real fondness.

“It’s sweet.” You smile, wondering if Eunuch Kim will ever manage to stop the stuttering long enough to actually tell Chun-ja how much he appears to like her. He is a mature man with most aspects, but apparently you’ve happened upon his one sole weakness. “But… He’ll probably be gone for a while. We won’t be able to light the lanterns.”

“I thought as much when I told him to go.”

“Well, it’s nice to take a break.” You don’t mention that you’d probably go anywhere and do anything, even if it’s just sitting around waiting, if it was with him. Instead, you look down at the pond, the water stilling enough for there to be a slightly blurry reflection of yourself awaiting below. “Hm. The water’s gotten a bit murkier these years. It used to be clear enough to see perfectly in. But it’s not so bad! Come look!”

Yoongi does. His pale face, all dark eyes and that rough, obvious scar, appears beside yours.

You fully intended on saying something else but that thought falls clear out of your mind when you realize just how undone your hair has become in all the bustle of the celebrations. I look like a mess, you think in a panic, hurriedly feeling for the strands to tuck them back. You’ve only managed to get one side fixed when a rock comes flying out of nowhere, plunging into the water with a noisy thunk! It disturbs both your reflections and wrecks the temporary mirror as cold droplets splash back.

“Hey!” You cry, leaping back from the pond to Yoongi’s grin. “What was that for?”

He has the audacity to look innocent. “Nothing. Haven’t you ever skipped rocks?”

“That was more a throw than a skip,” you grumble, checking your skirt as you hope it didn’t take too much damage. Thankfully, only a few drops actually landed on the precious fabric. “But yes, I love skipping rocks. Properly.”

“Here then.” You open your palm at Yoongi’s behest and he drops a stone into it. “Show me how to do it properly.”

You accept the challenge and plant one foot behind you, staring down a point in the middle of the pond, angling your arm as you position the stone in your hand. You most definitely look the part of an expert as you let the thing go. It shoots towards the water at a rapid speed, whooshing right through the air like a tiny bullet as it hits the surface at the angle and then proceeds to instantly sink to the bottom like, well, a rock.

Yoongi’s raucous laugh is no less than a roar, his entire body wracked with the exertion as he practically doubles over. He only gets louder when he sees the embarrassment on your face, the absolute mortification.

“I never said I was good at it…” You mutter, deciding to try a second time. This rock plummets right down to the watery floor too, refusing to save you even a little bit of face.

Yoongi’s settled into an infuriatingly smug look. “So, you can’t actually skip a stone. But you still love doing it?”

“That’s right.”

“Why?” He effortlessly makes a single skip before his pebble capsizes.

“I have a theory.” His curiosity piques at that; a turn of his head. “That it’s not up to us if the rock skips or not. Even if we have all the technique in the world,” you pick up another stone, “if the wind just happens to blow a bit harder, or if a fish from beneath disturbs the rhythm, or even if the tides themselves decide to surge up… It’ll fail. Or only skip the once. But—” You clutch the rock tightly in your hand and feel the weight, the cold, steady shape. “But if we wish hard enough. If we just keep trying every time we have the opportunity again and again…” This time, your rock is truly flying as it smacks the rippling water and skips a miraculous four times before finally dropping into the deep. “The universe might just make it happen.”

“…Or you need more practice.”

You shrug. “I’d rather believe that there are some things in the world simply out of our control. But that we can still hope for those things to shift, to change for the better if we never give up.”

Yoongi falls silent, staring at the ground through his downcast, delicate eyelashes. Maybe you said too much, you think. You didn’t mean to ramble. It’s just something you’ve thought about often. For these past months, it’s been the only thing keeping you going on the hardest, loneliest days. But you’ve made it. You’re still here. And by some miracle, he’s right here with you.

(You think maybe this is happiness.)

“I like that.” His eyes flick up to meet yours with an intensity that says he’s listening. He’s contemplating your thoughts and taking you seriously. He rubs the back of his neck, scratching at an invisible mark. “It’s a good theory. I… I understand it.”

There’s a weight to those words that you feel in the pit of your heart. A pull that draws you to him like the reckless tides towards his moon – a gravitational longing to know what truth vibrates beneath. You wonder if he feels it too.

“Seja-jeonha, I’ve returned!”

Eunuch Kim comes rushing back into the clearing, wielding the packet of matches. You both turn to him, letting the moment be whisked away with the wind whipping past the emerald robes, though you keep it safe in your memories. The eunuch has brought ink and brushes too, for you to write your wishes on the fabric itself. Increases the chance of their coming true, or so the legend goes.

After a few swishes of the brush, it doesn’t take long to light the fires. Your darkly inked characters are lit up by the flame, flickering staunchly beneath the opening as you each clutch a lantern in your hands and look at each other.

“What are you wishing for?” Yoongi asks.

“For more jeon,” is your reply, followed by an easy laugh that he echoes.

Then you let the lantern go as he does — two firebirds soaring side by side into the twinkling night.

a/n: *cue Can You Feel the Love Tonight playing softly in the background even though it hasn’t been invented yet*. hope you’re all enjoying sweet Yoon 🥺

#ficswithluv #bts fluff #bts imagines #yoongi x reader #yoongi fluff #min yoongi #historical au #rain writes #moonlit throne #... this is still a drabble series i swear haha #can you spot the members? 🤭

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jayeray-hq · 3 years

Note

Heyo! For your affection series could you add kunimi and goshiki? Thank you 🙏

Sure thing anon! Thank you so much for asking! If you haven't already seen it Kunimi is here!

Post Time Skip/Manga Ending Spoilers!

Warnings: None all Fluff!

How He Shows You Affection Master List - Character Masterlist

He Tells You About It (As Best He Can)

You watched your boyfriend pace back and forth in front of the TV as you leaned on the counter in your kitchen. Something was obviously bothering him, and had been since he’d gotten home from practice. He’d still greeted you with his normal exuberance, practically colliding with you the minute he spotted you, hugging you close, but something about his eyes had been off. He’d definitely seemed worried, which had started your suspicions.

Now that was pacing your suspicions were confirmed. Goshiki always paced back and forth when something was bothering him. According to him it helped him focus on his thoughts if he let his body move, so you’d left him to it. However, it had been something like forty-five minutes now, and you were starting to get concerned. Thus you decided it was time to attempt to intervene.

“Tsutomu, is something wrong?” you asked gently, your voice instantly snapping him out of his pacing as he turned to look at you, dark eyes wide in his face.

It seemed that your gentle prompt was all he needed though because he practically bounded across the room, carefully taking hold of your elbows in his large hands as he peered worriedly into your face and asked, “Do I tell you I love you enough?”

You stared at him blankly, trying to absorb the question, wondering what on earth could’ve prompted him to ask. However, your poor boyfriend had apparently taken your silence as either reluctance to answer, or no, because he immediately started to babble.

“Because I do you know, love you? I love you so much, more than anything, more than boiled flounder, more than the perfect serve, even more than my mom and Dai!” he floundered, staring at you a bit helplessly.

It took all your willpower not to giggle, when you knew he was being completely and utterly serious. Though you couldn’t help but find the fact that he’d told you he loved you more than his mother and his dog in the same sentence a bit hilarious, if utterly sweet. It was honestly a bit of a silly thing to be worried about, that he thought you didn’t know how much he loved you.

From the very beginning Goshiki had made it obvious he practically worshipped the ground you walked on. If you said jump, he’d be up in the air before you could even think to ask how high. He was always full of clumsy but well-meant compliments, and never failed to tell you I love you both before he left for the day and when he got home every night despite the fact that there were some in the more conservative Japan who looked down on expressing love for your spouse so openly.

He hadn’t ever given you cause to doubt his love for you, in fact there were only ever times when you wondered if you could live up to how much he loved you and return it equally. If anything you should be the one wondering if he knew just how much he loved you, not him.

“Tsutomu,” you interrupted gently, before he could get anymore worked up, “It’s okay. I know you love me.”

“You do?” he asked, with a worried frown.

You leaned forward to press a quick peck to the pucker between his eyebrows, earning a slight blush from your boyfriend, who despite how long you’d been dating still got flustered over the little things as you assured him, “I do. What brought this on?”

“Kiryu was telling the guys in practice that his girlfriend almost broke up with him because she didn’t know he loved her,” he explained readily enough, relaxing into your hold as you wrapped your arms around his trim waist, “I just wanted to make sure that wouldn’t ever happen to us.”

“It won’t,” you assured him with an affectionate smile, feeling soft at how cute he could be, even if he would argue until he was blue in the face that he wasn’t anything close to ‘cute’, “I’ve never once doubted how much you love me, Tsutomu. You know I love you too right?”

“Yeah,” he agreed, though the slight emotional waver in his voice told you it wasn’t quite as sure as he probably meant for it to be as he squeezed you close. You hugged back with a content sigh and made a mental note to tell him you loved him more often, because you knew how very much he loved you, you wanted him to know just how much you adored him too.

He Lets You Hang on Him

“Tsutomu!” you cheered, bright and joyful, waving at him from your place by the dividers that separated the court from the crowd.

You weren’t sure if he’d be able to hear you, what with how loud everything was, but low and behold the minute his name was out of your mouth his head was on a swivel searching for you. The minute he spotted you his whole face lit up, as he immediately jogged over to where you were standing.

Holding out your arms you were immediately indulged as he leaned over the dividers to give you your hug, completely unbothered by the crowd and the potential eyes on the two of you. The first time you’d done this you were the one who’d had to lean over the dividers, and your poor boyfriend had blushed up a storm the whole time, even if he’d returned your embrace.

Worried you might’ve made him uncomfortable you’d talked to him after the game and offered to not do it anymore and wait until the two of you were in private. To your shock your boyfriend had immediately protested, insisting you could reach for him whenever and wherever you wanted. He didn’t mind and he never would.

You’d taken him at his word, and slowly but surely, he’d stopped getting quite so flustered, and instead of you having to reach for him, he almost always reached for you first. It never failed to make you smile and feel appreciated and loved by your boyfriend.

It was special, especially since you knew that he didn’t reach for anyone else, and if they tried to reach for him he grumbled about it. Even his teammates weren’t exempt from this, as he always got huffy whenever anyone tried to ruffle his hair, or do anything that might mess with his image as the ‘cool Ace of the team’.

If it was you though he didn’t care a bit. Goshiki was more than content to let you hang all over him, giving hugs, lacing your hands together, linking arms or even the occasional chaste peck to the cheek. It had taken a little bit for him to get comfortable with it all, especially since he’d been so flustered at first, blushing and stuttering up a storm. These days though he barely batted an eye.

He accepted each and every physical gesture from you joyfully, a wide beaming grin on his face every single time. It was cute, especially since you knew if he was denied those gestures he’d get pouty and would shoot you the most devastating puppy dog eyes until you caved in and reached for him again.

“Are you ready for the game?” you asked him as you drew back from the hug, though your hands lingered at his waist.

“Of course!” he told you seriously, a proud, determined glint in his eye as he explained, “An Ace is always ready! We’re going to win this one for sure!”

“Of course you will,” you agreed, with a soft fond smile.

You reached up to press an affectionate kiss to his cheek, unable to help your amusement as he blushed and sputtered a bit as you told him, “Good luck Tsutomu! I’m cheering for you!”

Your poor boyfriend sputtered out his thanks and jogged back to his teammates, face still bright red, but with an enormous grin on his face. You giggled a bit to yourself as you watched his teammates gently tease him as he shook off his embarrassment and got his head in the game, feeling inordinately fond of your boyfriend, who loved you enough to do anything for you, even put up with a little friendly ribbing from his teammates.

You weren’t sure if you were looking forward to or dreading the day he became completely immune to the embarrassment of physical affection. All you really knew was that you were going to cherish each and every moment of it, and the adoration he had for you.

He Hypes You Up and Brags About You

“Alright, alright we get it already,” a familiar voice announced, sounding completely and utterly resigned. Something about the way it was said, making you pause in place.

You hadn’t been too sure about accompanying Goshiki to the reunion of his volleyball team from his high school days, mostly because you’d never met any of them before. However, you’d heard plenty from your boyfriend, who clearly admired them all a great deal, none more so than Ushijima Wakatoshi, the prize Ace of the Schweiden Adlers and one of his rivals.

You’d seen Ushijima from a distance before, as you’d attended the games when he played against your boyfriend, but had never had the chance to be introduced as he tended to leave quickly once the game was over. He was every bit as imposing and formidable as Goshiki had described him, though far quieter than you’d expected.

The others were all equally impressive and a little imposing. Tendou, Satori was MeTube famous, a sensation and an influencer known for his amazing chocolate creations. Semi, Eita was in a band who’s current song was in the top ten trending in the nation. Shirabu Kenjirou was a budding surgeon, and all the others were professional athletes of some kind or another. It was a very impressive crowd, and you suddenly understood a lot better why your boyfriend, strong and amazing as he was, could have such deep insecurities.

Still the group had been nothing but kind and welcoming to the two of you, and it was very obvious they doted on your boyfriend, who was something like the baby of the group as he’d been the only first year starter on the team. Even Shirabu, who constantly threw sarcasm at anyone and anything clearly only had Goshiki’s best interests in mind.

It had made you more than a bit nervous. Honestly, it was like meeting his family all over again. Luckily, it seemed to be going well so far, even so you’d had to excuse yourself to run to the restroom to freshen up a bit to give yourself a bit of a breather. They likely didn’t mean to, but the group was a little rowdy and overwhelming at times.

You’d been on your way back when you’d overheard what you were pretty sure was Semi, though it was hard to be sure given you’d only met them all that day.

“Your girlfriend is the greatest, we get it,” Semi continued, heaving a sigh, making you flush a bit. Goshiki was always hyping you up, and you’d caught him bragging about you to his teammates more than once. It was incredibly sweet, and flattering, if a little embarrassing at times.

“Aww, don’t be sad just because you’re a sad single Semi-Semi,” a voice that was definitely Tendou chimed in, “We should be happy for our cute junior.”

“You’re single too!” Semi hissed back, “And don’t call me Semi-Semi!”

“I think it’s nice that Goshiki is so happy with his partner,” a calm voice that you were fairly sure was Ohira put in thoughtfully.

“You don’t get to talk either mister married with a daughter,” Shirabu snarked.

“It’s nice to see everyone so happy with their partners,” Kawanishi mused, “you two look nice together.”

“She’s amazing,” Goshiki agreed immediately, with a dreamy sigh, that made your heart flutter and your cheeks flush, “I really don’t deserve her.”

You weren’t about to let that stand. Your boyfriend was really too sweet, and couldn’t be more deserving if he tried.

“I’m the one who doesn’t deserve you,” you told him, announcing your presence as you slid back into your seat beside him, clearly startling him though he didn’t protest as you reached for his hand, eagerly twining his fingers together with yours despite the pink flush to his cheeks.

“Gross,” Shirabu informed the two of you, though the small smirk on his lips gave away that he didn’t really mean it.

“I think they are nice together,” Ushijima announced, suddenly, cutting off the retort that had clearly been on the tip of Goshiki’s tongue.

There was a general murmur of agreement from around the table, Ushijima’s apparently the last word that was needed. You were glad to have seemingly gotten their approval, but at the end of the day the only opinion that really mattered was your boyfriend’s, and he’d made his perfectly clear to anyone and everyone that would listen.

He never failed to make you feel loved, which was probably why you were so head over heels for him, because there was no one else quite like Goshiki Tsutomu.

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erin-bo-berin · 4 years

Text

Enemies Closer

MASTERLIST

Happy smutty Spencer Saturday! This fic has been hidden in the depths of my brain for way too long. I knew I wanted to do an enemies to lover fic for a while but didn’t have much more for it until recently. The title comes from the famous saying “keep your friends close and your enemies closer”.

I want to say a big thank you to all of my followers who sent in quips, jabs and bantery remarks. I tried to use them all because they were all so wonderful. Thank you to @dreatine @andiebeaword @sammy-jo1977 @redbullchick and the numerous anons who contributed. Also a big thank you to @multifandommandy for coming up with the idea of the reader interviewing the little girl, it really helped move the story along and add to it. I appreciate all your ideas and help 💕

Okay, enjoy the 10k words of sassy, smutty Spencer Reid. Happy reading!

Spencer Reid/Reader

Rating: M (smut)

Word Count: 10,088

Spencer was walking back to his desk when he heard JJ’s voice.

“Really? When?”

There was a pause on her end of the phone conversation. She looked up and saw Spencer, immediately waving him over.

Spencer’s interest was piqued. He wondered what was going on, especially since there was a huge grin on her face. He approached her desk just as JJ spoke again.

“That sounds great, mom. I can’t wait.”

Spencer smiled. JJ and her mom were extremely close and he always looked forward to her visits—she made the best triple chocolate chip cookies he’d ever tasted. He opened his mouth to tell her to say hi from him, when she practically read his mind.

“By the way Spencer says hi.”

JJ shot him a wink, grinning at the fact that she knew him well enough to know exactly what he was about to say. He chuckled to himself. They definitely were close enough to know what one another was thinking.

“Sounds good. See you then. Bye.”

JJ hung up her phone, turning in her chair to face him fully.

“Is your mom coming to visit?”

“She is,” JJ smiled, “And she’s bringing your favorite triple chocolate chip cookies.”

“Bless that woman,” he chuckled.

“There’s also something else,” JJ trailed off nervously, a flicker of worry in her blue eyes.

“What?”

“Y/N’s visiting too...and she’s kinda stuck with me, or well us for the next week. So if we get a case, she’s coming with us.”

Spencer groaned loudly.

“Why?”

“Mom has a business seminar in downtown D.C. and you know Will took the boys to Disney World this week. I’m not going to make her sit at home alone for a week.”

“Why? It would be for the greater good of humanity. I’ll even be willing to chip in for a hotel room for her,” Spencer said, hoping JJ would actually take him up on the offer, “Particularly one across the country.”

“Spencer,” JJ eyed him warily, “Emily already said it was okay. She knows to stay out of the way while we work.”

“Yet she’s always in my way.”

“Spence, she’s not that bad. Why do you hate her so much?” she asked.

“Last time she visited she “accidentally” spilled an entire pot of coffee on my favorite work shirt!” Spencer protested.

“Just like you “accidentally” locked her in an interrogation room?” JJ raised a brow.

Yeah, that hadn’t been his finest moment. But she had driven him crazy that day.

“She wandered in there on her own. I was just helping the situation along,” he shrugged innocently.

“You’re lucky she didn’t burn the building down,” JJ mumbled.

“Yeah, well, she pushed me to my limit that day. Sorry.”

“What is it with you two? You fight worse than her and I ever did.”

“She’s annoying, rude and drives me crazy. I honestly can’t believe she’s your sister, let alone related to you. JJ, you know I love you, but I just can’t stand her. We’re just two completely different people that probably will never get along.”

“Alright, alright,” JJ held her hands up in defeat, “At least try to be on your best behavior?”

“No promises,” he grumbled.

“Hey, look at it this way. At least you get cookies,” she stood, patting his arm before walking away.

He was positive even cookies wouldn’t make up for this.

•

“Y/N while you’re here, can you please try to be nice to your sister’s coworkers?”

You suppressed a groan.

You were currently in the elevator with your mother at the FBI in Quantico, riding up the numerous floors to the Behavioral Analysis Unit, where your sister JJ worked. In your arms were a stack of containers, filled with sweets your mom had made for the team.

There were her famous triple chocolate chip cookies made with milk, dark and white chocolate chips, some apple cobbler, cupcakes and even a strawberry pie. JJ’s team were suckers for Sandy Jareau’s delicacies.

“Mom, I love the team. They’re like extended family, you know that.”

“You know what I mean.”

Your mom gave you a look that you swore only mothers could perfect. It was partly calling out your bullshit and part disciplinary all at the same time. It was amazing, really, 29 years old and you were still getting the “you better not act out” look from her. What were you, eight?

“I mean that lovely Dr. Reid. You’re always so mean to him.”

“He starts it.”

Okay, maybe you were eight.

“Y/N.”

The warning tone in her voice was all you needed to keep your mouth shut.

“All I’m saying is I don’t want another call from JJ saying you’ve gotten locked in an interrogation room and almost got arrested for assaulting a FBI agent.”

“Okay that was one time!” you said, exasperated, “Granted, it wasn’t my finest hour. But still. It’s not like I’m that bad all the time.”

“Really?” your mom looked at you, all knowingly, “What about that one time at JJ’s housewarming party?”

“I swear I didn’t glue his shoes to the floor!”

In your defense, that had been Derek Morgan, back when he was still working in the FBI, prior to his resignation. Of course though, no one believed that he had done it, apparently including your mother.

“Whether you did it or not, that’s not the point. You would’ve done it given the opportunity.”

You couldn’t deny that.

“Just don’t stress JJ out any more than she is. She said when the two of you are fighting it’s like trying to corral two feisty chihuahuas.”

You sighed, defeated.

“I’ll try to be on my best behavior mom.”

“Thank you. That’s all I ask.”

The elevator dinged, alerting you that you’d arrived at your designated floor and the metal doors slid open to reveal your sister and of course, Spencer.

Spencer Reid, the biggest nemesis of your entire life.

He was absolutely infuriating.

Tall, imposing, three PhDs, IQ of 187, Doctor Spencer Reid. That’s right, he wasn’t just Agent Reid, he was Dr. Reid. It was eye roll inducing.

He was a know-it-all, quite literally. If anyone said something even the slightest bit wrong, he didn’t hesitate to correct them. A person could breathe wrong and he’d probably correct that.

He constantly spewed facts. That was annoying enough in itself. You had no idea how JJ put up with it. But then again she was best friends with the guy. That blew your mind enough in itself.

If he wasn’t so annoying, he might actually be attractive. With a stature of over six feet, he was lean but without being a beanpole. His light brown curls always looked like he’d just rolled out of bed and/or never taken a brush to his hair. His eyes were definitely interesting though. You could never tell if they were brown, green or maybe even hazel.

Not that you’d been paying that close of attention. Nor did you care.

He had significantly more facial hair than the last time you’d seen him. Not a bad look for him, you had to give him that.

JJ once told you that a college class he’d taught for two weeks was filled with nothing but young girls auditing his course. She said it had confused Spencer. It confused you too cause you didn’t see how he was that attractive. He was kinda cute, if you liked the whole snobby, genius who doesn’t brush his hair, smartass type.

Oddly enough, you’d known him for half your life, yet couldn’t recall how or when you started hating him. It just seems like it had been that way all along, when in fact, it hadn’t.

“Mom! Y/N!” JJ exclaimed, grinning wide.

You felt a burst of happiness in your chest. You’d missed your sister. Despite the 11 year age difference, you guys were close growing up.

You were still a baby when your older sister Rosalyn had committed suicide, so you didn’t remember much about her, sadly. It was really hard on JJ as she was the one to find her. But as she’d told you much later, you’d helped her grieve. Reliving memories and keeping Rosalyn’s memory alive in sharing stories with you helped her heal after such a traumatic situation. It was often that you’d wished you’d had the chance to know your oldest sister, but with her death came an impenetrable close bond between you and JJ.

JJ immediately wrapped her arms around your mother, hugging her tight. You gave a nod of your head, your arms too full to be able to hug her at the moment.

“I’ll just go put these in the briefing room,” you said.

You turned, aiming to head through the glass doors of the BAU’s entrance, but instead ran right into Spencer.

“Here, I got it,” he took several of the boxes out of your arms so you could see properly again, “If only to save you from injuring anyone else.”

“My knight in shining armor,” you muttered sarcastically.

“Watch where you’re going next time.”

“You watch where you’re going. Besides, I didn’t need your help,” you retorted.

“Obviously, you did,” Spencer mumbled, following you through the doors.

You hadn’t even made it all the way through the entrance when you heard your mom and JJ sigh in unison. You heard JJ’s words loud and clear, as well.

“They’re already bickering less than five minutes in. Must be a new record.”

It kinda was. Usually, the two of you managed to avoid each other until the inevitable crossing of paths occurred. Today, though, you both had started in, right off the bat.

You placed the numerous arrays of desserts on the round table, knowing by tomorrow they’d pretty much all be gone.

“You’re welcome for the help,” Spencer snarked, setting down the few containers he’d carried.

You couldn’t help it, you rolled your eyes.

“I didn’t ask for it. So there’s no reason to thank you.”

“It’s the polite thing to do. Oh, wait. I forgot you don’t know how to be polite. My bad.”

You glared at him, the hatred stirring in your gut.

“I wish I could say it’s been a pleasure to see you again, Y/N, but it hasn’t,” Spencer said.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go greet your mother who actually deserves and appreciates my kindness.”

“Kindness, my ass,” you muttered as he walked away.

He turned, almost to the door.

“What was that?”

“Nothing,” you smiled in a fake, sweet matter.

He scoffed, turning and walking away.

Only when his back was turned did your fake demeanor drop and you stuck your tongue out at him.

This man would be the death of you yet.

•

“Penelope just got us a case. Luckily, it’s right here in our backyard so you can just sit in while we work. But please try to control your mouth.”

“JJ, I’m almost 30 years old,” you replied.

“Yes, but you still have a sharp tongue.”

“I promise not to make a scene, cause any trouble or be in the way. I know you have to work Jayj.”

After a round of greetings and hugs from the team and promises to stay longer when she returned from her business seminar, your mom had dashed off, leaving you at the BAU.

You looked up to see Emily Prentiss, JJ’s friend and boss motioning for her to join them in the briefing room.

“The team has to be debriefed about this case. Are you going to be okay here?”

You spun back and forth in her desk chair, motioning to the book you’d brought to read.

“I’ll be fine. Go work,” you shooed her.

JJ bounded off and up the stairs to the meeting and you picked up your book, ready to be entranced by the wonderful fantasy world of your book, far away from your reality.

“Why do people read that garbage? It does nothing but fills a person’s head with nonsense. It’s stupid and a waste of time. Although, now that I think of it, that’s probably a perfect fit for you.”

You peered up over the edge of your book.

You’d just gotten to a good part in your book. Your heroine was just getting ready to destroy the enemy and his lair, saving her love interest from the clutches of evil. It was a shame you couldn’t throw Spencer in the cage that your heroine was saving her lover from. Now that would make the book perfect.

“I’m reading. If you don’t mind.”

“Well it offends me. At least read something good. War and Peace is a good recommendation. Good story. I read it at breakfast last weekend,” Spencer said.

You turned up your nose. Leave it to Spencer to brag about his ability to read 20,000 words a minute and offer atrocious book recommendations in the same sentence. That in itself was offensive enough to you.

“This is why you don’t get dates, isn’t it?” you snipped.

He ignored the quip.

“I’m supposed to ask you for help with the case.”

Now this was interesting. You raised an eyebrow.

“What makes you think I want to help you?”

“You do realize the entire world doesn’t revolve around you, right?” Spencer’s eyes narrowed, “There’s kids that are going missing.”

That sobered you quickly. You dropped any anger you had at him, for the moment, realizing how serious the matter was.

“How? What’s happening?”

“Four kids have gone missing. We can’t figure out how or why. They haven’t shown up yet, so we’re hopeful that they’re still alive,” Spencer said, lips narrowed into a thin line.

“What do you need my help for then?”

“Because to understand what happened to them, we need to profile these kids.”

•

“Okay so we know from his parents, six year old Erik Yates was incredibly shy,” JJ said, looking at the whiteboard where the pictures of the four missing children were hung.

“He wouldn’t have talked to his own school teacher, let alone a stranger,” David Rossi said.

“But his best friend, Carlos Hoffman also went missing with him. They were having a sleepover, so he’d been at Erik’s house,” Emily added.

“And Carlos was the more outgoing of the two, wasn’t he?” you asked.

“Yup,” Tara said, flipping through her notes, “According to the parents, wherever Carlos went Erik was always close behind. So if they encountered a stranger, if Carlos was willing to go, Erik would likely follow.”

“I don’t know about that,” you piped in, “I’ve seen friendships like that in my class. Even if the kid is quiet, if they know something is wrong, they either say something to their friend or they just don’t do it period. I find it hard to believe that Erik would go along with someone he wasn’t comfortable with.”

“Says the one that’s not a profiler,” Spencer mumbled from where he was standing, examining the evidence board.

JJ shot him a look, before returning to the conversation. You pretended not to hear that one and for once, bit your tongue. You wouldn’t accomplish anything by arguing with Spencer at the moment.

“So let’s go back to the top,” Matt said, “Mrs. Yates went to the door and there was someone there either selling something or had an excuse made up for the unsub to guilt trip money out of her. She leaves to get her purse. The kids are in the living room playing. Then suddenly, by the time she gets back, all three are gone.”

“That’s how her story goes,” Luke said, looking through interview notes.

“What about the other children?” you asked, “How were they taken?”

“One was kidnapped at the park, the other at the grocery store,” Spencer answered.

“What if it’s someone familiar with their routines?” you asked.

You weren’t anywhere close to being a profiler, but you knew enough from JJ to sort of get by in this conversation.

“A lot of my kids and their families have strict routines. Usually because it benefits the child and/or they have other children that they keep on a schedule too. Wouldn’t that mean that it’s someone that they know?”

“It could,” Emily said, “But unfortunately that doesn’t narrow down much because the unsub could also just be stalking these families before the kidnapping. The unsub could potentially be a complete stranger to them.”

“Have you asked the parents of the children if they could think of anyone who could do this? Is there anyone that might overlap with these families?” you inquired.

JJ had opened her mouth to answer you, but of course, Spencer had to add his two cents.

“Are you an idiot? Of course, we did,” Spencer snapped, “That’s always the first thing we do.”

You bristled. Even when working together, he couldn’t be civil. He had the nerve to try and insult you and make you feel stupid, even though all you were trying to do was help.

“I’m not an idiot, Spencer,” you grit out.

“Oh really? You sure do act like one sometimes,” he retorted, writing something on the board.

Your defenses snapped back into place and you were ready to shoot back a remark when JJ interrupted you.

“Hey, hey, you guys. Quit it before I have to send you both into separate corners for timeout. We’re all on the same team here, trying to accomplish the same thing. Let’s just focus.”

“Matt, Dave, JJ, I want you to go and reinterview the parents. Y/N has a point. We need to make absolutely sure there’s no one in these families lives that connect with one another,” Emily ordered.

“Luke, Tara; both of you go to the schools. See if there’s been any strangers lurking around. We can’t rule out a sexual predator just yet, but it would help vastly if we could.”

“Penelope, you and I are going to work on a deep dive of these families.”

Garcia’s face scrunched at Emily’s order; she hated diving into people’s personal lives, but unfortunately it sometimes came with the job.

“We’re going to make sure that these parents aren’t holding back any secrets that could possibly help us.”

Emily turned towards you and Spencer next.

“Spence, I want you to start on a geo profile, see if we can figure out the vicinity of the unsub’s hunting grounds. Maybe we might even be able to find where he’s holding them.”

“On it.”

Spencer was already grabbing a map, spreading it across the round table.

“Y/N, I want you to help him.”

Spencer’s head snapped up.

“Hell no. Emily please-”

She held up her hand.

“I don’t want to hear it. That’s an order. If you disobey, I will put you behind a desk for a month.”

He relented, but you could tell he wasn’t happy about it. Not like you were pleased at all by it either.

“Try not to burn the room down while you’re working,” she instructed, walking out to meet Garcia in her lair.

Once she left, Spencer spun towards you.

“Let’s get one thing clear. You’re not to bother me while I work. You stay out of my way. I don’t need your help, nor do I want it. I can do my work just fine without you. I’ve been doing it for 15 years,” he snapped.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Spencer. Even I can tell when your IQ gets slashed to 60.”

“That’s the best you got, Y/N? I didn’t realize they let bimbos into the FBI. Oh wait...that’s right. I’m the one that’s the actual agent here. What is it you do again?”

“I’m a kindergarten teacher. You know that, you dumbass or else I wouldn’t be here helping you.”

“Oh, guess there’s no sleeping to the top in that field. Although, I wouldn’t put it past you.”

Your fists clenched. Spencer made you mad like no other could. Not even JJ could ever make you this mad.

“Just sit down and shut up while the adults work, okay?” he sneered at you.

“I’m not a child!”

You crossed your arms defensively. You weren’t about to let him get in all the insults. Ignoring him never worked, he was too obnoxious. So you just played it like he did, by slinging insults like dodgeballs at him.

“Well if you’re going to act like a child, I’m going to treat you like a child!” he threw back.

His eyes were blazing, his cheeks gone pink from his anger.

“Funny because you act more immature than my kindergartners.”

“WILL YOU TWO CAN IT AND GET TO WORK?!”

You both jumped at the sound of Garcia yelling from the bullpen. She made the motion that she’d be keeping her eyes on you two. You threw one more scowl Spencer’s way before flopping down on the sofa on the other side of the room.

This week was going to last an eternity.

•

Two days passed with no luck on finding an unsub, but they’d managed to put a profile together based on what little they did know.

The entire team was worried and on edge. Of course, that made the situation between you and Spencer even more volatile.

“Are you sure you’re an actual qualified agent? All you do is stand in front of a room full of police or your team and say smart things and gesture with your hands,” you mimicked Spencer, doing exactly what he was just doing earlier while they gave the profile.

“I do not look like that! You look like a baby dinosaur who doesn’t know how to walk,” he jeered.

“Yes, you do. All I’m saying is these civil service exams must be really easy to pass nowadays, huh?” you smirked.

“You know I’d ask if you could really be any more infuriating, but I’m afraid you’d take that as a challenge,” Spencer huffed, “Besides I’m supposed to be “nice” to you, since you’ve been so helpful.”

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you grinned mischievously, “I’ve been what?”

“I’m just quoting what Emily said. In my opinion you’ve been more like a pain in my ass,” he mumbled, looking through one of the case files.

“Oh sure because without me, would you’ve figured out that the unsub is a woman?”

“Probably. Don’t pat yourself on the back, sweetheart. You’re no match for us real profilers, Y/N.”

“I may not be, but you’ve met your match with me, pretty boy,” the nickname falling from your lips with deep sarcasm, “You can’t help but fight with me. For some reason I get under your skin and frankly, I enjoy it. It’s nice to know you can actually squirm, Spencer Reid.”

His lips pursed and he was about to speak when the phone rang. He answered it, putting it on speaker. Garcia’s excited voice came through it.

“Reid, gather the team. You won’t believe what I’ve found.”

•

“So it turns out, one of our families did have a secret. Although, it was something we weren’t even looking for,” Penelope said.

“What’s that Garcia?” Tara asked.

“The family of the first missing child: Daisy Rowe, had a nanny once. Her name is Kali Dye.”

Garcia hit the remote button to pull up the woman’s picture on the big screen at the front of the room.

“What does she have to do with our case?” Luke asked.

She stared at him, exasperated.

“If I could finish what I was saying, you’d know,” Penelope griped.

“Okay, okay,” Luke chuckled, “Carry on.”

You lived for Luke and Penelope’s playful banter. It was like the complete opposite of you and Spencer. They liked each other at the end of the day—not to mention everyone knew deep down they were definitely attracted to one another. Their banter was flirty. Yours and Spencer’s was anything but.

“As I was saying,” Penelope continued, “Kali was the nanny to the Rowe family back in 2016 when Daisy was only two years old. There was an incident where apparently she turned her back on little Daisy playing in the backyard. Daisy got too near the pool and almost drowned. She was in the hospital for a few days afterwards. The parents were obviously furious. I’m guessing Mrs. Rowe told all her friends about it because according to my research, Kali’s nannying career was basically ruined.”

“So you think this is an act of revenge? Did she nanny for any of the other kids she kidnapped?” Emily asked.

“No, that’s where it gets weird. She seems to have no connection to these other children,” Garcia said.

“Well we know who our unsub most likely is,” JJ said, “But how are we going to find out where she and the kids are?”

“I checked for that. There’s no significant places that she would take them, her old family house isn’t even in the state and besides it’s been sold years ago,” Penelope answered.

Emily’s phone rang as the team continued to throw around ideas of where to find Kali.

“Prentiss.”

You watched Emily’s face quickly change expressions, from neutral to shock, to worry, back to businesslike.

“Okay, bring her to Quantico. We’ll need to interview her.”

Emily hung up, turning to the team.

“The second child kidnapped, Eden Jenson just showed up at a police station in D.C. She managed to get away and ran for help. We need to interview her, but she hasn’t spoken yet. The chief of the police station is having one of his detectives drive here so we can interview her,” Emily filled the rest of the team in.

“I’ll talk to her. I’m pretty good at getting kids to talk,” Spencer said.

“Actually, I think we should let Y/N do it,” JJ said, looking at Emily.

“What?! She has no experience interviewing a witness, much less a victim!” Spencer exclaimed.

“I worked in art therapy when I was getting my degree as a teacher. I still use some in my class, plus I’m a teacher,” you said defiantly, “I know how to talk to kids.”

“I agree with JJ,” Emily said, “But Spencer, sit in with her just in case you need to intervene.”

You were sure he was going to do plenty of that.

•

An hour later, you and Spencer were sitting in front of a little, terrified Eden. Her—what you assumed were once neat—blonde pigtails were in all types of disarray. Pieces stood up everywhere while other strands came loose, hanging around her face. She was clutching her bunny stuffie, which you figured had been with her when she was kidnapped.

She had refused to talk to anyone, shrinking away frightfully at any imposing adults. You had to restrain yourself from literally pushing Spencer out the door when she shrunk even more into herself when she saw Spencer’s tall frame.

She’d been previously asked if she was hungry or thirsty in which she barely nodded. Now, she sat a bit less rigidly as she ate her Goldfish crackers and sipped on her juice box.

“Eden, my name is Y/N and this is my…friend, Spencer.”

You had to admit, you had a rough time getting that one out.

“We just want to talk to you, okay?” you said.

The little girl just stared back at you, wide eyed.

“Do you like to color?” you asked.

Still no response.

You pulled out some paper and a pack of crayons from a bin next to the desk. You pushed them across towards her.

“Could you draw something for us?”

It took a moment of Eden staring at the items before she opened the box and picked up a crayon.

“Do you mind if we ask you some questions while you color?”

You didn’t expect an answer, so you weren’t surprised when none came.

“Are you six years old? Six is a fun age. Are you in kindergarten or first grade?”

Eden looked up at you, from underneath her lashes, just briefly, before returning to drawing.

“I’m a kindergarten teacher myself. I’m used to seeing kids your age all the time. It’s spring break though and I miss my kids terribly. Do you miss going to school?”

Spencer shifted in his seat. You knew time was a delicate thing right now, but you were trying to get her to trust you.

“Eden?”

She looked up again. If she was surprised to hear Spencer speak for the first time, she didn’t show it.

“Could you describe the place you were at?”

Fear flashed in her eyes and she dropped her crayon, hugging tightly to her bunny.

You glared at Spencer.

“Just keep drawing, Eden. Okay? We’ll be right back,” you said, standing up, your hand a death grip on his arm.

Once the two of you had stepped out of the room and the door was closed behind you, you whirled on him.

“How can you be so stupid? I thought you were supposed to be a genius!”

“Y/N, you know we’re running on limited time to find those kids. We don’t know if Kali will hurt them or not!”

“I realize that. I’m trying to make her comfortable enough to talk about it.”

“Avoiding it doesn’t seem to be helping either,” he grimaced, hands on his hips.

“You saw what happened when you brought it up! She was terrified!”

“When dealing with a traumatized child you should tell them information about the situation they were in. It’s best they learn it from a trusted adult. Besides, it’s most likely they want to talk about it, but just don’t know how to bring it up.”

“And how would you know all of this, doctor?”

“Because contrary to your beliefs about me, I actually know how to do my job and how to do it well. I’ve dealt with things like this many times before. 60% of adults report being traumatized in childhood. 26% of children in the United States alone will witness or experience a traumatic event before the age of four.”

You blinked, unable to process so much information at once.

“Are you even human?”

“Are you?” Spencer shot back, eyes narrowed.

“You know, with all things considered, I’d thought you’d gotten the idea that I really hate you.” you sneered.

“Really? And here I thought that was your version of flirting,” he retaliated, sarcastically.

“Moron,” you muttered under your breath.

“Now, if you’re through calling me names, I’ve got work to do,” he said, reaching behind you for the doorknob.

“Wait,” you grabbed his arm, “Just let me try again first? Please? If I get stuck or need you, I’ll let you know.”

It was some of the most civil words you’d said to him in a long time. But you didn’t want to give up on this little girl. You wanted to help her and prove to Spencer and yourself if you were being honest, that you could do it.

He must’ve noticed your serious tone and pleading eyes because he relented. He nodded and you turned to go back in.

Eden was waiting for you when you returned, back to clutching her bunny.

“Don’t you want to finish your picture?” you asked, sitting down in front of her.

She pushed it across to you.

“Oh are you done?”

She nodded.

You picked up the picture, noticing four stick figures. Two seemed to be girls, two seemed to be boys. They looked like they could represent all four missing kids.

“Are these you and your friends?” you asked gently.

She didn’t say anything for a beat, then came a soft, timid voice.

“They aren’t my friends...at least not until a few days ago.”

“My friends here, they found out that you didn’t know these other three children. Is that right?”

Eden nodded again.

“Do you know the woman who took you?”

“No,” she said, equally as quiet as before.

“You’re doing a great job, Eden,” you smiled at her, hoping to encourage her, “Just a few more questions, okay?”

Another nod.

“Can you describe where you were?”

“I...I don’t know,” her voice trembled, as if she were going to cry.

You heard the door open up behind you and you turned to see Spencer. He gave you a terse shake of his head, as if telling you now was not the time to snap at him.

“Eden?” Spencer came around to her side and crouched by her, “You remember me, right? I’m Spencer.”

She nodded hesitantly.

“I want to try to help you help Miss Y/N here. To tell her what the place looked like that you were at.”

“But I don’t remember,” Eden said, frowning.

“I think you do. You know how when you’re afraid, you hide?” Spencer asked gently.

Eden nodded her answer.

“Well, that’s kinda what your brain is doing. It’s scared, so you think you can’t remember. What I want to do is have you to close your eyes and think back to before you were taken.”

“No, I’m scared,” Eden whimpered, hugging the stuffie.

“It’ll be okay. I’m right here,” he offered her his hand, which she took reluctantly, “I’ll be right here the entire time. If things get too scary, just squeeze my hand and we can stop. Alright?”

“Alright.”

She closed her eyes, listening to Spencer’s voice.

You were amazed at how soft and gentle he was with her. It was like seeing all of his razor sharp edges he displayed around you, smoothed out. You couldn’t remember if you’d ever heard him like this.

“Just focus on the sound of my voice,” Spencer whispered, “You were playing at the park. What were you doing?”

“Playing on the swing with my bunny,” she said.

“Okay, that’s good Eden, you’re doing wonderful. What do you hear?”

“Lots of kids playing. They’re very loud.”

“What happens next?”

“There’s a lady behind me. She asks if I would like to play in the sandbox with her. I told her yes but I didn’t want to get bunny dirty.”

Eden is trembling now and you eye Spencer warily. He holds his free hand up and you don’t say anything, just yet.

“Very good Eden. Did you go play in the sandbox?”

“No. She took my hand and led me away from the swings. I asked her where she’s going because the sandbox was the other way.”

“Do you want to stop, Eden?” Spencer asked.

“N-No. I a big girl like mommy always says.”

“Okay. What happened then, sweetheart?”

“She grabbed me and put her hand over my mouth. I tried screaming for my mommy, but I couldn’t. She took me to a car.”

“Can you remember what the car looked like?”

“Um, blue. It was blue. It had a lot of doors. It was long too.”

Spencer looked like he realized what she was describing.

“Did the middle door slide open and closed?”

She nodded, her eyes still closed.

“It was big inside with lots of seats. That’s all I saw before she covered my eyes.”

It sounded like an SUV or family van.

“When you were in the car, did you ride for a really long time? Or a short time?”

“A short time.”

You jotted the note down.

“One last question honey. Do you remember anything about the room you were in? What did it look like?”

“Like...like my bedroom. Only much dirtier. And old looking. There’s...there’s flowers on the wall. There’s a lot of toys, but I don’t want to play. I want to go home. Me and my friends are so scared. She’s coming back, she's coming back!”

“It’s okay, it’s okay! I’m right here.”

Eden’s eyes snapped open and he enveloped her in his arms, holding her tightly as she trembled.

She didn’t let go of him until her parents arrived.

•

After kicking the information over to Garcia and her being the goddess she is at finding even the most hidden information, she found the house.

The team had found her car, registered to Kali, but with a false last name. From there, Garcia looked for any run down buildings or homes for rent within 10 to 15 minutes of that park. The team agreed that Kali wouldn’t have bought a house for the simple reason of too much work. She didn’t seem to be that dedicated to a well thought out plan. That was when Garcia discovered an old house rented under the name of Kali Rowe, the same last name of the family she had been a nanny for.

You stayed behind while the team went out to rescue the children and hopefully bring Kali Dye into custody.

They did.

All four kids were now safely reunited with their parents and Kali had been arrested and hopefully was going to get the help she needed.

Since you hadn’t been there, JJ had filled you in afterwards when everybody had gotten back. You were sitting next to one another in the briefing room, talking, while everything settled down.

Kali Dye had been so distraught over the loss and destruction of her nannying career. Apparently at one point, she had been a wonderful nanny. What had happened with Daisy, truly was an accident. Whether she had had a mental breakdown or suffered from an unknown or untreated mental illness beforehand, they didn’t know. But she soon became desperate to prove she was a good nanny.

She kidnapped Daisy first, to prove her point. Then three other children that she’d followed, learning their schedules.

She had taken good care of them, at least in her mind. In reality, she hadn’t hurt them or touched them one bit. She fed them, gave them all attention and all the toys they wanted, to play with.

It was a sad situation, really. But you were glad that the families had a happy ending and their children were back safely in their homes tonight.

“You did good little sis,” JJ smiled, “Keep it up and you may just have to think about switching careers.”

“No thanks,” you chuckled, “I’m happy teaching kids, not seeing them in life threatening situations. I don’t have the heart for that.”

“Spence said you did really well getting Eden to open up,” she said.

“I’m surprised he actually knows how to compliment a person, let alone me,” you scoffed.

“Y/N. Come on. What’s your deal with him? This has been going on for years now.”

“I don’t know. I just can’t stand him.”

“That’s a cop out and you know it,” JJ said, “He’s a good guy. Besides, you used to have a crush on him when you were younger.”

“Ew, did I?”

You wrinkled your nose, trying to remember. JJ had joined the BAU when you were only 14. A lot had happened in high school, let alone the 15 years since she’d first joined. You didn’t visit her very often because of school and all of your other extracurricular activities, so you hadn’t met the team until about a year after she started.

“You don’t mean the summer after my freshman year, do you?” you asked, “Cause back then he was a cute little dweeb and it lasted like two seconds anyway. I had a case of raging hormones to the point I had a crush on just about anything male with two legs.”

You rolled your eyes, disgusted at the fact she’d even think that you’d have a crush on Spencer. Although deep down, deep, deep, deep down, a little part of you knew that she’d hit the nail on the head.

“Why do you hate him though? He’s my best friend. I love him and I want you two to get along.”

You snorted.

“Yeah, I know you love him. Remember, you told me that you told him that you’ve always loved him? That he was your first love?”

You bit your lip, trying hard to keep the jealous edge out of your tone. This is what you’d tried hard to avoid all these years. You hated that you felt like this but you’d been covering up your true feelings for him and the situation, with anger all these years. If you kept yourself at a distance, you were less likely to get hurt.

How wrong you were.

“Is that what this is about? Because I told Spence I loved him?”

“No.”

Maybe.

“Y/N.”

She gave you the same look that your mother had given you in the elevator just days before.

“Jeez, you’ve got mom’s “look” down pat,” you mumbled.

“Please tell me the truth. Is my confession why you hate him?”

Her eyes pleaded with you and you couldn’t help but cave. She was your sister and your best friend and you knew she cared.

“No. I don’t know, maybe partially. But I disliked him way before that anyway. He’s just a know-it-all smartass, that annoys the shit out of me and is just like every other guy to fall head over heels in love with Jennifer Jareau.”

You grimaced, “For a guy that has an IQ of 187, he sure doesn’t know how to be different from other guys.”

“Okay hold up,” JJ held up her hands, “First of all, he is not head over heels in love with me.”

“JJ, please. You’re not an idiot.”

“I’m serious. He may have been once, but he’s not anymore. We’re best friends and that’s it. Besides, we worked out that mess over a year ago. He’s even dated since then.”

“The kid actually dates? I’m shocked,” you said, putting a hand on your chest in mock surprise.

JJ ignored your antics, continuing on.

“Second. He’s actually a really great guy, Y/N. He’s a real sweetheart, really. It’s just a side of him that you don’t see.”

“Yeah like the dark side of the moon,” you muttered.

“Just give him a chance and try to be nice? You know what mom always said. You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Besides, if you want to go for him, that’s fine.”

You laughed outright at that. As if that would happen.

“On that note, I think I’m gonna head back to your place,” you said standing.

“I have to stay a little later to finish up some work. Can you get home okay on your own?”

You assured her you could and you grabbed your purse.

“Y/N?” she called, as you were about to the glass doors.

“Yeah?”

“Just think about what I said, okay?”

•

If you thought you were gonna get a reprieve after that uncomfortable conversation, you were sorely mistaken.

The moment you stepped out of the BAU, you saw Spencer standing, waiting for the elevator, his hands clutching the strap of his tan satchel as he waited.

“Ah, there she is. The woman who saved the day,” he quipped sarcastically.

“Fuck off Reid. I’m not in the mood.”

“You know, I’m actually shocked that you’re good at something besides bitching.”

You ignored him, your teeth clenching.

“I’m surprised you held your tongue as long as you did earlier. Bet that’s a record for you.”

The elevator doors opened and you got on without a word, Spencer following you.

“What? No comebacks? Amazing. Has Spencer Reid actually won for once?”

You whirled on him, dropping your purse to the elevator floor in the process.

“No because you’re full of shit. You’re the most annoying, stubborn ass, infuriating, egocentric, smart aleck in a fancy suit I’ve ever met!”

His eyes narrowed and his mouth hardened. He pulled his satchel over his head, dropping it too, to the floor. He pushed the emergency button of the elevator with such anger, it was amazing that he didn’t break it. The elevator suddenly came to an abrupt halt.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” you screeched.

Your body was thrumming with anger. You could and likely would pummel him at any second.

“You’re not leaving this elevator until you tell me what the fuck your problem is,” Spencer glared.

“My problem?” you huffed.

“Yes because I have to deal with you jumping down my throat every single time I see you. You’re the most stuck up, spoiled, self centered, bitchy little brat I’ve had to deal with!”

“Ha! You sure you’re not talking about yourself?”

“You know what I think your problem is?” he challenged.

“Go ahead, try me. I’d love to hear.”

“I think, you don’t know how to deal with how you’re really feeling. So you hide it under anger. You lash out every time your feelings threaten to surface. It’s become a defense mechanism. It’s all you know. You fight with me because it’s the only way to protect yourself; you throw words as your daggers. Simply because you can’t get me out of your mind. I push you to limits you don’t want to think about. You may swear and declare that you hate me but in reality, you’d be thrilled if I took you right up against this elevator wall.”

His voice grew deeper with every word that tumbled out of his mouth.

“Are you profiling me? Cause that’s one hell of a reach.”

“Is it though? You wanna know how I figure that? You told me the other day that I met my match. That I can’t help but fight with you because you get under my skin. Well you were right. I do enjoy it and I think you do too. Because it turns you on. It does the same thing to me. You get under my skin yet at the same time all I can think about is how I want to fuck you until you’re screaming my name.”

“You think I’m gonna fall for that shit from just another guy who’s crazy about JJ?” you sneered.

For the first time, he actually looked just the tiniest bit surprised.

“You think I have feelings for JJ? If I had feelings for her, do you honestly think I’d spend all my time and attention on you?”

“How the hell am I supposed to know?”

“JJ isn’t the one that occupies my brain, no matter what I try to do, Y/N,” he said through gritted teeth.

His face was mere inches away from yours now. Close enough to see an array of scattered freckles on his face. A few under one eye, a tiny one on the side of his nose, one on his forehead.

His stubble had gotten heavier in the last few days, becoming more scruff than stubble. His lips were naturally plump, an asset that would be the envy of any woman. They were also a natural shade of dark pink, maybe even leaning towards red.

Anger heated his eyes. Or was it desire? You wondered if you looked the same way. Right now, they looked more green in the brighter light in the elevator, but you could still see rings of brown around the edges of his eyes. They were also filled with mischief as if he were up for a challenge.

“You really think you’re going to distract me by putting your tongue in my mouth and getting my panties wet?” you hissed.

“Is that what you want?”

A smirk formed on his lips. He was definitely challenging you.

Your legs were trembling now. Although if you were to admit it, you weren’t entirely sure if it was from anger or arousal.

You pressed your lips together, refusing to say anything, almost afraid what would come out of your mouth. He had you cornered up against the wall now.

“Maybe I should just find out for myself,” he said, propping his hands on either side of the wall by your head, “Make you moan in my mouth while I finger you.”

The anger that was coursing your veins earlier had definitely now turned into desire. Your stomach churned with it. You could feel his body mere inches from yours and the heat from it was making your entire body temperature feel that much higher.

“It’s not like I haven’t imagined making you moan my name,” he whispered, his voice gravelly, his tongue moving out over his lips in a quick swipe.

Your breathing had become shallow and you were throbbing with need. Before you could think of what you were doing, you were already unbuttoning your jeans.

“For once in your life I wish you’d shut up and just do it,” you grunted.

He grabbed your face roughly with both hands, his lips colliding with yours. They were hot and rough against yours, this kiss so hungry and animalistic that it was unreal.

His body was pressed against yours as he pressed you against the cool, metal wall. You could feel his arousal pressed against your thigh and you unwittingly moaned into his mouth. You had a difficult time wrapping your head around the fact that you’d gotten him so hard.

Then again, you were having a hard time wrapping your mind around anything that didn’t involve him.

His tongue moved with yours, ironically increasing your desire, making you wetter. Just like you’d voiced earlier. Damn, the guy sure knew what he was doing.

He pulled your jeans roughly down your legs until they were enough out of the way that he was satisfied. His lips attacked your jaw, then neck, being anything but gentle, but it was working you up more than anything.

Your hands gripped his arms, your teeth bearing down into your bottom lip, resisting the urge to give in to what he wanted: hearing you moan.

He pulled away from you making you suddenly desperate for his lips on your skin again. He pried your hands away from him and held them against the wall, his hips pressing into yours.

His suit pants were a lot thinner than your jeans, so you could feel his erection pressing into you, dangerously close to your throbbing core where all of a sudden, you wanted him the most.

Spencer’s fingers ghosted over the fabric of your underwear, causing you to inhale sharply. It felt good and you wanted more.

You reached for his hand, trying to push it against your core, but he pulled it away, shaking his head.

“No. This is all you’re getting until you admit it.”

His finger trailed up the center of your panties, having just enough pressure to slightly feel his touch. You groaned at his teasing. If your past years of banter had been foreplay then you were more than ready for him to have you.

“Admit what?”

“That you want this,” Spencer stated simply.

His fingertip swirled lightly over the fabric, just above your clit. Light enough that you didn’t get any real friction from the touch and you bucked your hips, desperate to feel it.

“I think it’s fucking obvious,” you said through clenched teeth.

“Yes, but I want to hear you say it.”

His smirk was wolfish. You knew he wasn’t going to give in unless you did what he said.

“I want this,” you groaned.

“What’s that?” he tipped his head to the side, “Can’t hear you.”

“I want this,” you said, a notch louder, gripping his wrist.

“This?”

His fingers dipped into your underwear and his thumb pressed hard against your clit.

“Ah, fuck yes,” you moaned.

He grinned, his finger dipping into your wet warmth.

“Seems like my tongue in your mouth did indeed make you wet,” he chuckled lowly, pulling your underwear off with his other hand.

His fingers teased you as you writhed and moaned, clawing at the elevator wall behind you. He had this amazing way of rubbing his knuckles against your walls as his fingers pumped in and out of you.

“Holy shit, fuck Spencer,” you whined.

You were so turned on, you hardly had any recognition of what was tumbling out of your mouth. It sure seemed to please Spencer, though.

He kept you on your toes though, slowing his fingers just when you thought you were reaching the brink of your orgasm, twisting them so gradually, it was almost painfully pleasant. You swore your eyes almost rolled back in your head when his fingers curled inward in his direction, catching that sweet spot at just the right angle.

He was kissing you as you moaned appreciatively in his mouth. His hands were quite literally magical.

His fingers finally sped up, his thumb focusing all its attention on your clit. You could feel your release quickly approaching and you were ready to succumb to it. You wanted Spencer Reid to make you cum so hard you’d be begging for more.

He did just that.

Your high hit you as you released on his fingers. Your eyes screwed shut, your head banging against the wall. You actually think you stopped breathing for a short second before air rushed back into your lungs and you released a long moan.

“Oh my god, Spencer,” you groaned, reaching for the waistband of his pants.

He’d given you one hell of an orgasm and here you were, ready to beg for more. Especially if they came while he was buried to the hilt inside you.

“That was hot as hell,” he muttered, kissing you again, “It’s sexy seeing you spend all your energy on an orgasm instead of yelling at me. It’s healthier for your body, too.”

He smirked, his teeth pulling on your lower lip gently before pulling away. His hands were working with yours to push his pants down and his boxers too.

“Are you willing to admit you want me to fuck you against this wall now?” he growled.

“Yes, yes. Fuck yes, please.”

Man, if he wanted you to be his bitch ages ago, he probably should’ve just fucked you. One orgasm at his hands and you had turned into a writhing, begging and moaning heap.

But still, you couldn’t help but wonder if he could make you feel so good with his hands, that it would most likely be ten times as amazing with his dick.

He lifted you up, holding you against the wall. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he pushed into you. You felt yourself stretching in ways you hadn’t felt in a long time and you couldn’t hold it back; a long, low moan of gratification left your lips.You hated to admit it, but he felt fucking fantastic inside of you.

By his own confirming groan, you could tell he felt the same way as you. At the back of your mind you couldn’t help but wonder why this hadn’t happened years ago.

His hips rocked against yours, slowly at first as his mouth found yours. He was as ravenous for you as you were for him.

Your fingers dug into his back as his thrusts became faster and harder. He was quite literally fucking you into this metal wall and you were loving every second of it.

Your emitted moans were coming every few seconds with every slap of your skin against his. His own grunts and groans came from deep in his throat, making you even hotter.

“S-Spencer,” you stuttered, pulling his face back to yours.

You have him a brief kiss before smirking up at him.

“I’m the spoiled little brat that’s got you moaning like a little bitch,” you panted.

Your words made him groan as he gripped your sides. He must have excellent control because he managed to get a hold of himself, slowing his hips to where he was tantalizingly pulling out of you and pushing back in.

“Still hate me, Y/N?”

“Right now, yes,” you groaned, trying to pull him deeper within you, wanting the previous speed and depth back.

“Now?”

“Ye- ahhh,” a breathy moan came from you as he resumed his harsher and faster thrusts.

“I don’t hate you,” you groaned, lost in the pleasure he was giving you.

Maybe voiced thoughts during sex were the truth because you actually didn’t hate him. Especially right now.

“Fuck, Y/N, yes baby,” he groaned.

He was close to his peak, you could tell. His fingers were on your clit, circling furiously. He was going to make sure you got your orgasm, before he got his. Who knew he was actually so decent?

Your whimpers, moans and groans were rising in pitch. You halfway hoped no one could hear, but at the same time didn’t care. Let the whole building hear.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. Spencer, I’m coming, I’m-”

With that, the coil of pleasure that had been building up snapped like a broken rubber band, shooting through your entire body.

You may have screeched too, you’re not entirely sure. You were completely lost to the bliss of your orgasm and even more so when he came apart not long after you. If you had thought he was attractive before, he was a hundred times more sexy when he was orgasming above you, all caused by you.

Your movements slowed, your chests both heaving. He held onto you carefully, as if he was afraid to set you down just yet. Probably a good idea considering you felt like you’d lost all function in your legs.

You laughed incredulously, unable to believe what had just happened. That had simultaneously been the craziest yet hottest thing you’d ever done.

Spencer’s smirk was replaced with a more shy, happy smile. It was a better look than the scowl he’d worn for you for so long.

It was like the moment that first orgasm hit you, all the anger, all the hatred, all the negative feelings you’d felt towards him drained from your body. You didn’t have the willpower or the desire to hate him anymore. Not that you ever really had.

“I meant what I said,” you said quietly.

“What’s that? You said a lot of things,” he chuckled.

“That I don’t hate you.”

He took a few moments in silence, parting from you and gently setting your feet on the floor again. He took his time getting decent again, as well. You worried at your bottom lip as you did the same, nervous that you’d said the wrong thing.

“So I was right? About the defensive mechanism and everything?”

“Yeah,” you nodded somberly, “I horribly misjudged you; thinking you were stuck up, full of yourself, better than anyone else, the kind of guy that was like all the others and in love with my sister.”

“If anything, I would think what just happened would prove more than anything that my sights are set on you.”

He had a point.

“Why did you hate me though?”

“I was thrown off by your reaction to me. I thought you were a self entitled, spoiled brat and that you thought you were better than me. Seems like we both vastly misjudged one another.”

“It’s kinda a good thing though,” you said.

Spencer looked at you, baffled.

“It is?”

“Well yeah, cause if none of that happened then that wouldn’t have happened either,” you gestured to the place where moments before the two of you had been a tangle of limbs.

“Good point,” he chuckled.

“Uh, Spencer?”

“Hmm?” he looked at you, eyebrows raised.

“You might want to get the elevator moving again.”

“Oh! Right.”

He laughed, hitting the emergency button to restart the elevator.

“I apologize for giving you so much grief though. I’d do anything to make it up to you,” you said.

“How about letting me take you out then? You’re still here for a few more days, aren’t you?” he asked.

You smiled.

“I think I can make all the time in my schedule for you, Spencer.”

His answering smile was enough to make you smile in return.

Oddly enough, the elevator had gone down and back up without stopping, returning to the floor the BAU was on.

“That’s weird,” Spencer mumbled.

The doors parted to JJ waiting to get on.

“Hey, what are you guys still doing here? I thought you left an hour ago.”

Huh, so it’d been an hour.

She got on the elevator, standing between the two of you.

“Elevator issues,” Spencer answered, before you could think of what to say.

“So you’ve been stuck in the elevator together this entire time?” JJ asked.

“Yup,” you answered.

“I guess it’s a miracle you two didn’t tear each other apart then,” she muttered, hitting the button for the ground floor.

Yeah, there might’ve been some tearing involved.

Behind her back, you and Spencer shared a secret smile.

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