#also he literally thought his gf was cheating on him. with a guy who took sneaky pics of her like. valid actually sorry

[hopefulsapphic]

i'm an early seasons steve harrington apologist. sorry. he was not a bad person he was not a bad boyfriend he was literally just 17

#he wasn't even that bad. and he apologized when he was #also he literally thought his gf was cheating on him. with a guy who took sneaky pics of her like. valid actually sorry #and season 2??? why does he call himself a shitty boyfriend he was actually so sweet??? #a little emotionally stunted maybe sure but he was a teenage boy trying his best #every time i rewatch i'm like what was everyone on about he's literally fine. i think ppl blow his king steve phase way out of proportion #steve harrington #stranger things #thoughts from my brain #1k

[echoing-oursong]

I sent something like this to someone else but I also want to know your thoughts

It's frustrating when people try to use the different standards of the 80s an excuse for Jonathan "not realizing" the weight or impropriety of taking the photos of Steve's house and of Nancy (ignoring that he zoomed in on the window to clearly see Nancy), and it took Nancy calling him out (and not, apparently, being confronted in the parking lot and his camera smashed by the three other living people in those pictures) but then refuse to concede that when Steve calls Jonathan queer it's done in a way to work him up and pick a fight, and for the period is generally mild as far as homophobia goes.

Both actions were wrong but to say Jonathan didn't know better because of the period but Steve was an unrepentant homophobe for one instance in a period that had excessively violent homophobic rhetoric and atmosphere, just seems like the people making that argument are trying to make excuses for Jonathan (despite saying they aren't) and don't like Steve. I don't think either of them were right in these instances but I do think Steve was more provoked (though his gf cheated on him with guy that took creepy pics of them) in a way that makes sense for a teenage boy and went too far insulting Jonathan's family while Jonathan literally just wanted to take pictures of a party he wasn't invited to and claimed he was looking for his brother (but stayed there at least ten minutes?) Idk it's just like. Why use the societal expectations of the 80s to contextualize one and not the other

okay i am sorry for the late reply. but you are absolutely correct! the fact that people say "it was the times" for what jonathan did is honestly yikes, especially because it wasn't for those times at all. people taking video/photos of people are wayy more present in now times then in the 80s but also i wasnt born/around in the 1980s so i could be wrong. what Jonathan did is wrong regardless of the time that he is in - why do people think that it is okay for him to take pictures of people that do not know he is there and that are getting naked? like it's not goof that jonathan stans use that excuse.

lol gonna sound like a hypocrite but what steve says is way more of the thinking of "it was the times back then". it's still not right but what steve says is way more telling of the times then what jonathan did. also yeah those people who don't even think of this are just weird, because how can you justify the pictures by saying "it was just those times" and not say that about what steve says in a fight where it was a throwaway line? steve's line is just a throwaway line and honestly not too deep - jonathan himself doesnt even get angry at all that steve said it. you're sooo right about everything that you just said. honestly it's insane how one line that steve said is somehow more damning to people in this fandom than jonathan taking photos and only giving an apology because he got caught

#answered asks #thanks

[sluttywonwoo]

study buddies || k.mg x reader

Pairing: frat!mingyu x fem reader 

Summary: studying for midterms with the guy you’re hooking up with goes exactly how you’d expect

Warnings: swearing, light smut (18+)

Word Count: 1.6k

a/n: reworked this old blurb originally posted on my tom holland fic account ( @wazzupmrstark ) for my gf’s birthday :)) happy birthday @hotgirlmingyu

Masterlist

You woke up to banging on your apartment door. Groaning, you rolled over to check your phone and saw that it was six am. You pushed yourself up and out of bed and padded into the kitchen to answer the door. You were surprised the relentless knocking hadn’t woken up your roommate, but she was a pretty heavy sleeper.

You yanked the door open to see Mingyu with a handful of textbooks. You squinted at him in confusion, wondering if you were seeing things. Mingyu had never been to your place before, you didn’t even know he knew where you lived.

His appearance startled you a bit. His hair was messy where it was usually slicked back or styled and he was wearing gray sweatpants and a white t-shirt. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him in anything other than khakis and a douchey printed shirt.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, rubbing your eyes.

He frowned. “You said we should study for midterms together.”

You thought back to the last time you’d seen Mingyu. You couldn’t remember saying anything like that.

“Was I drunk?”

“Probably.”

“So why are you here?”

“To study. You agreed that we could help each other out.”

“Mingyu, I don’t even remember agreeing to that.”

“Well I’m already here,” he said and pushed past you into your apartment.

“Seriously? It’s Saturday.”

“Yeah, and midterms are next week.”

“Couldn’t you have waited until the sun was up?” you grumbled, mostly to yourself and shut the door behind him.

“We’ve got a lot of material to cover.”

You cursed under your breath as you watched him set up at your kitchen table, knowing you should probably study even though you desperately wanted to go back to bed.

You and Mingyu had met at a party at his fraternity and woke up the next morning tangled in the sheets of his bed. To say it was awkward would have been an understatement. You didn’t think you’d ever see him again, but to your horror, you saw him in your stats lecture on Monday and your mythology class on Thursday. This was a pretty big university. Why did the same asshole have to be in two of your classes?

As much as it annoyed you, you couldn’t stop thinking about Mingyu, and apparently, he was having a similar dilemma because every time you went out he seemed to be there, and every time you hooked up.

That was the extent of your relationship, though. You didn’t even speak to each other in class or at parties. The only time you talked was behind closed doors when one or both of you was naked. Even then you kept your guard up because you refused to let yourself fall for a frat boy with commitment issues who never wanted to be seen with the same girl twice. A boy who wouldn’t even talk to you in public.

But you couldn’t ignore the way your heart fluttered when he said your name as he was about to cum, or the way his lips felt against yours. He could be a total dick, but you’d also seen a softer side of him that he didn’t show many people. You forced yourself to forget about that side. It was easier that way.

“Okay, what are we starting with?” you asked with a sigh.

“We have the stats exam first, we should work on that.”

You made a face. Statistics was the harder out of the two for you. In fact, it was the hardest class you were taking this semester.

“I can’t believe I’m doing math before seven am.”

“You won’t be complaining when you ace the midterm,” he quipped, already working on a practice worksheet.

You watched him solve problems like he was checking items off a list. You knew he was good at statistics, but you didn’t know he was that good. Figures, a guy like him was good at pretty much everything. Everything except mythology apparently, because once you’d switched to that he was flustered and frustrated. You would quiz him on myths only for him to get every single question wrong.

“Mingyu, did you even read any of these?” you asked, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“Yes, y/n, I read every one. How do you think I passed all the reading quizzes?”

“Cheating?” it slipped out before you could stop it and Mingyu gave you a hard glare. You held up your hands defensively. “Just a joke.”

“I don’t think it was.” He licked his lips. “But for what it’s worth I read them all. I just can’t keep them straight.”

You sighed. You felt bad, but you were getting frustrated too. And not just because Mingyu wasn’t grasping the myths. This was the longest you’d ever spent together (at least while you were awake) and you hadn’t even had sex. He just smelled so nice and looked so cute when he was concentrating that you couldn’t help feeling a little impatient. You had been at it for hours, you thought you would’ve done it at least once by now. But Mingyu was more serious about studying than you thought. It was kind of admirable and kind of annoying.

“Okay well reread through the Egyptian myths and I’ll quiz you again.”

“Alright.”

He pulled out his reading packet and flipped to the section you took out your phone and scrolled through social media mindlessly as he read, but it quickly got boring. You wished Mingyu would take a break so he could rail you. He was still reading intently, but you figured a little distraction couldn’t hurt.

You started by taking your hair down from your bun and shaking it out so that it fell around your shoulders. You knew your shampoo drove Mingyu crazy and hoped it would have an effect on him today. He shifted his seat, but didn’t look up from the packet. Next, you leaned over and rested your head on his shoulder. You’d never done something so domestic like this with Mingyu, but it seemed to work because he cleared his throat and adjusted his sweatpants.

“You know you could be working on math.”

You shrugged. “We already did stats for hours today. I think I’ll jump off a bridge if I look at one more differential equation.”

He fell silent and tried focusing back onto the reading, but you moved your hand to his thigh and kept it there as you continued to through twitter, not even reading what was on your screen.

“Stop that,” Mingyu muttered, making you jump a little.

“Why?”

“Fuck, because you’re distracting me. You look too hot right now.”

“I’m wearing pajamas.”

“I really don’t care. You still look hot and I’m trying not to fuck you senseless right now.”

“Well what’s stopping you?” you asked lowly and nipped at his ear.

“Need to finish this,” he replied through gritted teeth.

“I can’t convince you to take a break?” You moved the hand on his leg up so that you were cupping him over his pants.

He shook his head. “After.”

You leaned over and kissed his neck, then his jaw, and felt him get hard under your hand. “If I have to stop what I’m doing you won’t be able to walk for the next week.”

“That sounds like more of a motivator than a deterrent,” you admitted. “I’ll suck you off,” you offered and hooked your thumb in the waistband of his sweats, trying to bribe him.

“If you let me finish I’ll eat you out,” he countered.

You straightened up. It sounded like a pretty good deal.

“Fine.”

A few minutes passed in silence and you were waiting patiently, typing up a rough draft of an essay you had due for another class when Mingyu groaned.

“What?” you asked, wondering if he needed help.

“Can you please stop that?”

“Stop what? I’m literally doing nothing.” You were genuinely confused now.

“Just- I don’t know you’re making it so hard to concentrate.”

“Am I making it hard?” You smirked.

“Very funny.”

“Would it help if I put a paper bag over my head?”

“Probably.”

“Come on, keep reading about Osiris.”

“I don’t want to read about Osiris anymore, he’s a dick.”

“The faster you finish the faster you can get off.”

“I thought you didn’t want to wait,” Mingyu pointed out, trying to deflect.

“I think I recall something about you going down on me if I let you finish reading.”

“Fine,” he grumbled, but didn’t turn back to the book. Instead, he continued to gaze at you with those big brown eyes. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

“What?” You felt your cheeks get warm.

“I just really want to kiss you right now.”

You smiled and raised your chin, challenging him. “Then do it.”

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours. You closed your eyes and kissed him back, savoring the moment.

When you pulled away, Mingyu’s eyes were dark with want and you could see that he was now fully hard in his sweatpants.

“How about I eat you out now anyway?” He suggested, leaning forward to kiss your neck.

You moaned and brought your hands to his hair.

“You trying to bribe me?”

“Is it working?”

“Fuck yeah.”

Mingyu stood and picked you up from your chair. You wrapped your legs around his waist again. He pulled on your bottom lip with his teeth and smirked.

“Promise you’ll finish studying after?” you asked.

He considered it. “Does what we’re about to do count as studying mythology? Because it’s going to be legendary.”

You scrunched up your face in distaste. “No, I take it back. Put me down.”

Mingyu grinned. “Hey! You know no ones gives it to you as good as I do.”

“That confident are you?”

His grin turned into a smirk. “Is that a challenge?”

lmk what you think i always appreciated feedback!!

forever tags: @haven-cove

shoot me an ask to be added/removed from my taglist

#study buddies #kim mingyu x reader #mingyu x reader #mingyu smut #kim mingyu x fem reader #mingyu x fem reader #mingyu x you #mingyu x y/n #mingyu x female reader #kim mingyu x female reader #seventeen smut #seventeen x reader #svt smut #svt x reader

[andilovetowrite]

Really in Love? 🔥

Leo Valdez x Reader (Athena Cabin Reader)

Summary: Leo didn’t know what went wrong. One minute, he had a smashing goddess girlfriend and an equally awesome best friend. And the next? One of them in the Apollo cabin, and the other one in the Apollo cabi- well, infirmary.

Warnings: mentions of dying, cheating and some blood. Also some elusions to smut and making out. A lot of angst. That's all I’m gonna say.

Word Count: 1.6k

Masterlist and Prompt List ;)

100 Follower Sleepover

My requests are also open in case you have any more ideas and prompts!

Life for Leo Valdez had been going good. He had just gotten back from helping Apollo, or Lester, and things had been going well. Calypso had just come back from her camping trip, and she and Leo were inseparable.

Which made things a tiny bit hard for you. You were Leo’s best friend, and right now, you and him were tasked with making the new Big House for the camp. Normally, Chiron would call Annabeth, but since she was out of town with Percy for god knows what (you knew what, he was going to propose to her), he had put you in charge of this project. And since you wanted to make the new structure a bit more technologically advanced, you decided to call Leo in.

And the progress had been going well. Until Leo’s entire attention was given to Calypso. Nowadays, you couldn’t even get a minute alone with your best friend without his annoyingly beautiful and mean gf next to you. And off the record, you had been starting to like Leo a bit. When you both were in the quest, and the only two single ones on the ship, you kinda felt like there was something growing between the both of you.

Turns out you were wrong, because in a few months, after your best friend allegedly “died”, he came back on a flying dragon and a goddess in his arms. Too bad you couldn’t find a boyfriend to take your mind off Leo.

So, life was awkward, but fine. Well….until you got shot in the stomach by an arrow. Yeah, it wasn’t your best moment. It was the day after you had had your one-on-one with Calypso, and you had managed to avoid her, but whenever you tried to get Leo on his own, she just happened to be there. So you decided to get him by himself when you both were working on the project. But before that, you had archery. And least to say, you were quite sufficient at it. So were the rest of your classmates, or at least the people at the training room.

So you knew you didn’t get shot by a fluke. The question was that, who would shoot you?

And you knew the answer. Austin Lake. The only guy in the feild who had some sort of resentment towards you. Why? Because he was your ex. Your breakup wasn’t the smoothest one. There was a whole lot of screaming and yelling. Oh, and a couple of threats and slaps. But you would’nt think that he would shoot you. Where you could potentially die.

So for the rest of the day, while you were in the infirmary with Will, you racked your brain thinking of a reason. But it wasn’t until you saw Calypso walk in that you finally understood. She had come in around the time that Leo would be in his Bunker, banging out dents and marks in his newest projects, with everything else out of his mind. It would be the perfect time to sneak away. At least it would be for Calypso.

You had suspected that Calypso had been cheating on Leo for a while. But you had never had a chance to prove it. Until now, where you had a perfect sight of Calypso and Austin holding hands as they made out at the back of one of the beds.

The sight made you sick to the stomach. Surprisingly, it wasn’t because of Calypso kissing your ex. But rather your best friend’s girlfriend kissing Austin Lake. Your mind went to the hurt look on Leo’s face when he would find out, and you could feel the pain radiating off him.

But you couldn’t keep it from him, so you decided to tell him as soon as possible. Gritting your teeth, you tried to stand up for yourself, pushing your hands against the bed. The pain in your stomach intensified by about a 100x, but nevertheless, you tried to ignore it.

Suddenly, you heard a gentle yet cruel laugh. “Oh Y/N, what do you think you’re doing?” You whipped around to see Calypso standing above you, with Austin at her side, and with one pointed look, he took out an injection, filled with green liquid.

“I’m going to tell Leo-”

“No you aren’t. Because you will not get up to ever tell him”, she said maliciously, as you watched in horror. Austin grabbed your arm, and even though you were stronger than him, the pain medication didn’t allow you to push him back. He brought the needle to your arm, and growled at you, his face turned up in a deep frown. With a slight pinch, he pushed it in harshly, the needle cutting through your flesh. Instantly, you began feeling drowsy, as your vision started swimming.

“Y-ou wo-won’t ge...t away with thi….sss”, you tried to say, but all that came out was strangled mutters.

Calypso laughed, swiping her hand on your fingers as her nails dug into your arm. “Oh sweetie, you can’t possibly think a child of Athena would beat a goddess that’s been around for millenia, right? Otherwise, you would be even more stupid then I thought you were…”

And that was the last thing you heard before you drifted off into a inky black darkness.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leo’s POV

Leo walked around the Bunker back and forth, confused on where you were. It was almost 6, and you still hadn’t shown up. Worried, he grabbed his tool belt, tying it around his waist as he left his workspace, going over to the Athena cabin.

“Hey guys”, Leo greeted, trying to spot any sight of you. Malcolm came up to him, his face etched with worry.

“If your looking for Y/N, she was in the infirmary. Apparently, some jackass shot her in the stomach with an arrow. We tried to find who did it, but nothing so far, so we are just waiting for her to wake up.”

As he heard that, he practically started running out the door but he stopped when Malcolm called him back.

“Visiting hours are shut right now. But Austin was the last one to see her, maybe check in his cabin?”

Leo nodded, and although he didn’t like the blond, muscular camper, he still wanted to see how you were doing so he made his way there.

And boy, did he wish he would have gone to see you instead. Because when he walked through the Apollo cabin door, he didn’t expect to see his girlfriend half naked with a shirtless Austin.

“Leo!”, she yelled, covering herself up.

“You-”

She tried to come near Leo, hands reaching for him, but he stepped back, as if her touch was burning hot. “Leo, I didn’t mean to…”, she trailed off, as she began to see the little sparks of fire starting to burst out from his fingers.

She stepped back, and for a second, you could see Leo calm down, wondering if he scared her. But when she reached for Austin’s hand, as she enlaced their fingers together, you could see the fire build up in Leo again.

“How could you-”, he shook his head, not believing it, “I-I was the one who got you off the island” He looked furious, but then his face crumpled as he stared at her. “I lied to my friends. Acted like I was dead for weeks. Just so I could save you, so I could get you off that prison!”

She didn’t say anything, as she just kept looking down at the floor. Half of you hoped that it would just swallow her whole.

“I literally gave my life, and you cheated on me?! You-you knew I had an issue with him-” Realization struck his face as he pieced two and two together. “Th-that’s why you didn’t want me coming with you to the infirmary, did you? Because he would be there. That must be your little get-to-know-you times, huh?”

She tried to shake her head, coming closer to Leo, but he ignited his hands again, this time making them burn bright. “You can’t possibly think that’s why-”

“Oh no, don’t try and make me think of something different. I’m a freaking mechanic Calypso! I wake up if I hear the faintest of sounds, and you wouldn’t think that I would find you sneaking out every night?”

Calypso stared at him, vision swimming with tears, but her face hard. Leo tried to find some bit of her left in there, but gave up, turning around to look for you. “How is-”

“Oh Y/N, I wouldn’t go to see her. Unless you wanna see her bod-”

“What the hell?”, Leo asked, his voice firm, as his mind went into overdrive. “What did you do Calypso?”

“Nothing much..”, she said, but he didn’t hear another word as Will Solace burst into his cabin.

Out of breath, and sweaty, he looked at Leo. “Y/N needs you… she is close to dying”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That was it, the first part! I’m sorry I didn’t get to the second part, but I think the cliffhanger may add to the storyline, so let’s see if that works out. Thanks so much for requesting this, and I hope you enjoy it :)

#percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #pjo #HOO #Pjo #leo valdez #calypso #hephestus #cabin #cabinet #heroes of olympus #leo x reader #athena cabin #annabeth chase #Leo McShizzle #Angst #Fluff #headcannon #fanfic

[soulwillower]

heather • richie tozier

(richie tozier x reader)

[based off the song heather by conan gray]

requested:   OMG I HAVE AN IDEA IDK IF ITS GOOD AND IDK WHY IM TYPING IN ALL CAPS BUT CAN U DO A FIC WHERE LIKE ITS BASED OF YHE SONG HEATHER BY CONAN GRAY WHERE THE READER AND RICH HAVE BEEN BEST FRIENDS FOR SO MANY YEARS AND HAVE FEELINGS FOR EACHOTHER BUT THERE BOTH SO OBLIVIOUS- SO WHEN RICHIE LIKE GETS A GF ONE DAY THE READER JUST WHSKWHDIWHWIW IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT BUT LIKE AT THE END THEY REALIZE THEYRE IN LOVE. SORRY IF ITS TOK SPECIFIC. LOVE U. IM RUNNING OUTTA CHARACTERS 

warnings: swearing, mentions of underage drinking, themes of cheating but no actual cheating, angst, fluff at the end, unedited.

thank u guys so much for being so patient with this fic <3 love u all so much!

[losers + reader are  18+ in this.]

4.4k words

(also, this fic starts with a flashback and idk if i like this style, but lmk if it works) 

♡

the persistent beat thudding in your ears seems to do nothing more than dim your already low mood as you sip on lemonade by yourself in someone's basement bar, sitting on an uncomfortable metal barstool and leaning your head heavy against your chin.

these days, it seemed as though the world was painted in gray.

you look around almost lazily; bev and ben went outside in the snow a couple minutes ago, stan just took a girl upstairs - you're left alone now, because mike and eddie had to study for their exam and bill was feeling under the weather. and richie, as usual, was late.

there's almost twenty other people in the room right now, but you have no desire to speak to any of them. you've been trying to have fun tonight, but you're just having a hard time, feeling distracted and unable to stop thinking about wire framed glasses and a certain bright smile.

your wandering eyes halt your thoughts as a girl in your class - heather perez -  catches your eye from across the room, her hair falling in natural curls that makes you sigh in envy. she smiles and waves at you warmly, gesturing for you to come and sit with her. you swallow and look down into your cup of dreary, graying lemonade as you try not to think about how you look in comparison. she's so fucking pretty. you look back up and shake your head with a friendly smile, faker than a plastic flower, and nod to the bathroom. she shrugs and smiles, turning back around.

she was too sweet, it hurt.

her naturally dark hair, long and wavy, her smooth dark skin, her laugh.... but suddenly, your head snaps back up after recognizing a familiar sight on heather's figure.

-is that richie's sweater?

your heart thumps and churns in the most unsavory way as all the breath leaves your lungs in one swift exhale. you feel sick to your stomach and your hand falls to hit the counter to stabilize yourself, the lemonade sloshing out of the cup slightly. but you pay no mind. heather's wearing richie's sweater...

you know that sweater really well. it's definitely his, and for some reason that makes you want to cry.

you blink and force yourself to suck air into your lungs as you look around quickly, anywhere but at heather perez wearing richie tozier's sweater, with all the stripes and patterns and the rough polyester material. you're not sure why you're so caught off-guard, you knew that heather perez was maybe-kinda-sorta seeing your trashmouth. he'd mentioned it in passing a few times and you've not been able to keep it off your mind as bev and bill whisper to richie about it in the halls or during hangouts when you were laying in stan's lap pretending not to hear it.

it hurts, though. holy hell, does it hurt when richie turns the corner and the typical, 'hey, richie!' choruses through most of the people in the basement - and yet his eyes are just set on her.

it hurts even worse when you make eye contact with him and he smiles at you, nodding in greeting and calling a "hey there, toots!" over the thumping of the noise before turning back towards heather.

your heart thumps erradically as you eye him sliding an arm around her shoulders easily, pulling her into his tall lanky frame,  crushing your chest and deflating your trembling heart. heather's head falls onto richie's shoulder and you shiver, feeling colder than you've felt in so long. the lemonade you force to your lips tasting like stale water as the sight of richie pinching heather's shoulder and thumbing his own sweater on her frame make you feel empty.

even now, weeks later, you remember how it felt. you sip on the boiling tea and immediately burn your tongue, making you swear as you stare out your window, the snow falling around your house in the dark making you feel an odd, empty kind of peace. that fucking sweater.

you haven't talked to richie in almost a week and a half - he got in trouble the night after the party and his parents took his phone away - at eighteen years old, his parents took his phone - so that he could 'spend time with family' (a task that made you chuckle to yourself when bill had explained it to you about twelve days ago).

it's winter break, though, and you've been missing the last piece of your eight-person puzzle the last few times you've hung out with your friends. it feels empty without richie's boisterous shenanigans, snarky looks and goofy comebacks... you feel really embarrassed for missing him so deeply.

tears well up in your eyes as you think again about his damn sweater, the one that heather was wearing, the same one he'd given you not even three weeks prior.

"well look at you." richie says with amusement trickling through his voice like melting icewater through a calm creek.  you spin towards him with a grin eclipsing your face as you shrug around his sweater, pretending not to smell his strong scent and pretending not to feel the immediate comfort it gives you.

"you know, for as dumb as it looks, i kind of like it." you tease, brushing some hair back from your eyes as the sweater sleeves fall back down past your hands. he laughs, eyes not leaving you for a second.

"shit, doll. keep it." he says, sounding serious. it makes you pull a face at him, starting to lift it slightly over your head to return it to its rightful owner.

but he shakes his head, hands gently gripping your arms and halting your motions, subsequently setting your heart on fire. his lips are set in a gentle grin as he shakes his head again. "it looks so much better on you."

it's spoken simply, in such honestly that it makes you blush nearly immediately. in fact, you're so flustered that all you can do is shove him a bit, stuttering out a quiet, "shut up, richie, you- i - okay, whatever."

it makes him chuckle as he takes the soft blow of your hands against his shoulders, deftly running his hands through his curly locks as he shakes his head. "you're adorable, kid."

you're lucky he'd turned around to gripe around on his messy bed for his laptop, because the stupid grin you're sure is painting your face is enough to make you dig your own grave and then hand him the shovel. if only he knew how much you liked him.

you didn't keep the sweater after that night, though. at the time, you'd told him it was because it was putrid; that the colors and patterns were a sin to man and that you'd never be caught dead wearing it out. he laughed the whole time because you had literally worn it to the store with him it with him that same day. but now, you'd give anything for richie to give you that sweater again, to feel that polyester inseam fall against your stomach and your arms and chest, like a huge richie hug (without all the bones and the cologne and the caffeine-pulsing heartbeat - so not a real richie hug, but as close as you could get to the real thing without actually just having it).

god, you like him too much. you rub your face with your palm, the moisture from the tears that had accidentally escaped your eyes smudging against your face. you're tired, almost - it's like an empty, heartbroken exhaustion that sags your shoulders and chokes your throat and makes you zone out for minutes at a time. one thought overwhelms you right now, so as you see a car's headlights shine out your window through the falling snow, you don't even notice it.

you just wish you were heather.

you've tried to hate her. really, you have - you figured maybe, just maybe, if you were able to rant to bev or eddie about how much of a bitch heather is, how she's terrible to richie and how boring she was, maybe you could justify the heartbreak in your chest.

but god, she's so perfect. heather, with her shiny hair, bright smile, her flawless mind and caring heart. she's, as far as you're concerned, an angel. of course richie would choose heather, who wouldn't?

the other day at that party, you'd tried your hardest to ignore your intrusive thoughts, but you can't help feeling like it would all be better if heather didn't exist. and even that thought alone hurts your heart, because you remember the smile on richie's face when he looked at her, swathed in his sweater and floating around the room like a beacon of light.

and you could never, ever in good conscience take that from richie.

you almost laugh at how absurd it is - now you're talking to yourself while you stare out the window, half asleep, dreaming of freckles placed just like constellations and crooked noses, of jawlines that jut out and long, lanky fingers; of loud, chipping laughter and beat up high-tops with cuffed corduroy pants.

"y/n?" a voice behind your door makes you jump a bit, unsettling your already disconcerted bones. you’re imagining him, now? you laugh into your scalding mug for a second, but after a double-take at the doorway you find the angel himself to be standing there with a perplexed look.

"richie, what're you doing here?" you ask, rubbing your eye to make sure no tears are left. he looks troubled. "i knocked, but nobody answered. so..." he says with a shrug, and you ned, tucking a leg under yourself and nodding.

"what are you doing, toots?" he asks, backlit by the hallway light. and then you finally can see what he's wearing, and you almost laugh at your own misery.

but you don’t laugh, your brain short-circuiting as you feel the knife twist further into your abdomen. the stupid fucking sweater.

“-um, nothing. y- did you get that back from heather?” you try to deliver the line as smoothly as possible, but by the look on his face, you did a real shit job at that.

“what?” he asks in an exhale as he shakes snowflakes from his hair and shoulders, closing your door as he walks towards you and falls to sit next to you on your windowsill seat.

“i thought you gave her that sweater.” you say and he raises a brow, “yeah, like two weeks ago.” he says slowly, eyeing you. he adds, “she obviously didn’t need it after that.”

you frown, “did she need it then?” you didnt try to sound bitter at all, but your voice comes with more of a sting than you’d anticipated.

as always, richie meets fire with fire. “it was twenty fuckin’ degrees out, she was wearing a tank top.”

you don’t know what to say so you just stare out the window with a quick huff, crossing your arms. "why does it matter? it's a sweatshirt." he mutters. "i was just being nice to her."

you nod, pain twisting around in your stomach. he's right, it's just a sweater. but he gave it to her, because he likes heather better.

“what’s up with you, kid?” he asks, gentler this time.

“don’t call me kid, richie.” you say sharply, not meeting his eyes. “and there’s nothing up with me.” you know you’re being difficult, but you really don't have the energy to argue with him right now.

it’s quiet again, and the silence is even more awkward. you take another scalding sip of your tea. 

“um, y/n... is this because of heather?” he says after a bit. you feel the tension that the acknowledgment brings as it hits you in the thick, cold air. richie’s tapping a rhythm on his thigh, so you can tell he feels it too.

"richie." you say weakly, your voice coming out too quiet, too obviously broken and exhausted. "i cannot do this. please don't do this right now"

he blinks at you, eyebrows furrowed. "sugar, i'm so lost right now."

you decide to change the subject. "-why'd you come over?" you ask, actually looking at him then immediately regretting it. he looks hurt and confused, like a lost puppy.

"oh. um, i just need to tell you something.it's about heather, too." he sounds anxious, and you roll your eyes, looking down at the tree outside your room as wind blows powdery white mounds off its branches.

“can this just wait until tomorrow?” you whisper. doesn't he get it?

it's quiet and for a moment you believe that he's going to leave it, to not bring up the obvious jealousy brewing in your chest. but he breaks the silence too soon.

"i tried to kiss her." he says and you immediately look towards the door, the most immediate escape possible. 

your breathing gets heavy; if you have to hear this, you know you'll admit your feeling to richie, and you don't want to do that to him. but you have a suspicion that he already knows.

"richie, i'm so, so glad to see you. and that you like heather. really, i am. but- it's not a good time. i'm not- i'm not okay." you say, voice thick as tears well behind your eyes.

richie’s eyes widen almost comically as you make eye contact and his hands immediately find purchase on your arms, his thumbs rubbing in the way that he has done ever since that one foggy summer you spent in the sewers. "y/n/n, what's wrong, sweetheart?" he asks, watching sadly as a tear slips from your cheek. it breaks your heart when he calls you sweetheart, and you shake your head.

you can't tell him the truth - that you love him, so instead, you mumble, "i've missed you. there's a lot going on, and i just really need you."

he looks guilty as he pulls you into a warm hug, one that takes you off guard but that you return gratefully. "you've been too busy spending time with heather and with your parents, and i understand that, i just - you know, i miss you." you say, voice muffled as your cheek is squished into his shoulder. he sighs shakily, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. “i know i’ve been with her a lot, i’m sorry sugar.” he mutters. 

it feels like you’re both holding something back from the other. 

"i wish i were heather." you say against his shoulder, knowing richie’s completely unaware of the depth of your statement. but he pulls back and stares at you, an unknown look on his face. you open your mouth to say something, but you're cut off before you can get anything out.

and his lips fall against yours lightly, almost as if they’re ghosts against yours. his presence feels fleeting. 

you barely close your eyes and press closer to him before you snap out of it, jerking backwards with wide eyes.

richie’s eyes fall open too as he looks at you questioningly. your heart is thumping heavy as you shake your head, more shocked than you thought ever possible. “what?” he asks, as if he’s surprised you’re not kissing back.

you give him a sad, broken look. you think you’ll cry as you mutter, "why would you ever kiss me? i'm not - i'm not nearly as pretty as her, i'm just-"richie suddenly looks like he might get sick, his face paler than usual as the steam from your tea dwindles idly between you. he cuts you off. "-why are you - why are you saying all these things y/n/n-”

“heather. you like heather.” you say frantically, trying to remind him so you dont have to live through this fresh faced heartbreak twice as painful if he kisses you again. 

but richie shakes his head, and your confusion skyrockets just as much as your heartbeat."no. a-amy asked her out." he says breathlessly. "-she said yes."

you blink, pulling even further away as it dawns on you. "wait. so... so you only want to see me after the girl you wanted finds someone else?" you ask, watching as the smile gets smacked off of richie's face so quickly you think it may give him whiplash. "wait, no-" he starts, but you shake your head.

“richie, do you understand how hurtful that is?” you say, voice heavy as you try not to let tears fall.

he shakes his head, eyes glossing with tears as he gapes at you, “n-no, y/n-“

“fuck, richie. i know you know about my feelings for you. how could you do this? i’m not heather, i’m reminded that every time i’m in the same room as the two of you. she’s had you completely mesmerized for the last month, you can’t just use me to distract yourself.” you say, your tea completely forgotten as a tear escapes your eye.

he shakes his head, looking at you with an emotion you don’t have the energy to decipher. “leave, richie.” your voice is broken and it shakes as you look away from him.

you’re not sure what you were expecting, but when richie stands up silently you dont even look away from the window. you see him wipe his cheek in your peripheral before he sighs quietly and walks out of your room, shutting the door quietly.

you cry openly as you hear your door shut downstairs, your hands shaking as you cover your face, your shoulders shaking with sobs. you make it under your covers just as you hear a car engine sputter outside, your heart empty and lips still tingling as the feeling of richie’s lips linger on yours. you groan into your pillow and let out another sob, your eyes squeezing in agony as your heart feels like it’s ripping in two.

because even if they’re not together, richie still likes her.

why couldn’t you be heather?

you cry until you’re asleep, your now cold mug of tea resting on the windowsill as your phone charges next to you and snow swirls in the dark sky.

when you wake up the next morning, your headache is nearly blinding. you feel like crying more as you remember last night. you roll over and rub your eyes, unlocking your phone groggily.  

but you check your notifications and your heart immediately stops as you see a missed call from richie at 3:49 in the morning last night, and a voicemail left a minute later.

well, you guess he got his phone back.

your fingers tremble as they hover above the play button, feeling like you may vomit from anxiety - the message he left is two minutes long.

closing your eyes, ready for even more heartbreak, you press play and hold the speaker to your ear.

“um, y/n.” the voicemail starts off, and you’re already tearing up because richie’s voice is full to the brim with anxiety and he’s not using his usual nicknames for you. 

“uh... okay, i- i know it’s four in the morning, and you’re probably asleep - god, i hope you are, and that you’re not ignoring me. not that i dont deserve it, but i just want you to get good rest. uh, a-anyways. fuck,” there’s an awkward pause and you’re holding your breath.

“you know i’m not good with phone calls or voicemails-“ his rambling just adds to your anxious feeling, but you think if you don’t listen to this, your anxiety would eat you alive.

“- fuck, i don’t know how to say this. kind of ironic, i guess, since i’ve been thinking about saying it like every day for probably more than a year- okay, i’m... god, spit it out, trashmouth.” his voice gets thicker and you can hear the emotion as he takes a shallow breath.

“y/n/n, you make my hands shake. i swear, my heart feels like it’s going to backfire and explode when we touch... and it scares me so fucking bad.” you feel your heart halt in your chest, the air leaving your lungs.

you keep the phone pressed tightly to your ear as richie’s recorded voice goes on.

“-fuck, y/n. i’m terrified. sometimes i think.... like, whoever created me... they designed me just to be yours. and... it’s not in the same way i feel about bev, or bill, or eddie-“ his voice breaks as he sniffs on the other end and it dawns on you that he’s crying. “-you’re you. you’re y/n. i tried to like heather as more than just a friend. but...” it’s silent for a second.

“i just kept comparing her to you. i do that with everybody. i think i’m broken. i love you so much that it hurts.” he’s crying enough by now that it’s leaking into his speech; he’s hiccuping, stuttering slightly, his inflection changing as you can almost picture the tears rolling off his thick eyelashes and onto his rosy cheeks.

“-and i can’t sleep right now knowing that i hurt you like this. i can’t believe that i let you think of yourself as lesser than heather in any way-“ he sobs quietly in the recording and takes a stuttering breath. "i can’t believe i put myself before you. i’m such a shitty friend. i should’ve been giving you my stupid fucking sweaters the whole time.” 

tears are pouring out of your eyes as you sit up, ripping the comforter off your legs. you’re pulling on socks and your shoes as you continue to listen to richie’s voicemail.

“i’m sorry that i kissed you, and i’m sorry that i dragged you into this m-mess, that i used heather as an excuse to ignore my feelings for you. i-i love you so fucking much, and i’m just so scared of hurting you. i’m so sorry that i hurt you, y/n.”

you have to see him.

“-and, um, i’m sorry i left this voice message. this is probably the worst way to find this out but i figured that it would be easier for us to ignore if it wasn’t in person- y’know, because you don’t have to respond. just- now you know. that i’m sorry, and that i don’t expect you to forgive me or want to speak to me for a while. i just- i need you to know that you’re so loved, y/n. and that you deserve so much better than me.

“so, um, okay. i’ll let you sleep now. b-bye.” he whispers the end and then the line cuts dead.

you’re left with shaking breath and tears in your eyes as his voice rings in your head. you try to take in what he’s just said, but you think you’re about to pass out.

how can richie love you back?

you brush your teeth almost aggressively as your heart beats erratically in your chest and then you’re suddenly flying down the snowy road towards the tozier’s house.

you realize too late that you look completely awry, hair unbrushed, eyes puffy and swollen, shoes untied as you knock on the front door of richie's house.

went opens the door, richie’s younger sister sat on his hip as he smiles at you, "y/n! long time no see. richie's upstairs in his room."

you smile at him in thanks, too rushed to say anything to him or munch. then you’re all but sprinting up the stairs, only feeling the anxiety as you throw open the door to his bedroom. 

you're relieved that he's laying in his bed, surrounded by pillows and fluffy comforters as he jumps from the noise of your arrival.

when he sits up, neither of you say anything. his eyes are red and rimmed with tears, a heartbreaking sight as his lower lip trembles slightly. you're sure you look the same as you take a step towards his bed, your eyes not leaving each other's for a second.

he looks incredible, still. 

"y/n..." he whispers finally, his eyes wide. "did you get my message?" he says, lips tilting in a stupid, forced smile. his voice holds no humor in it's sad thickness, though, and you sigh as you look down to the carpet.

you shake your head, "can you not joke for a minute, rich?"

he laughs wetly, standing up fully and although he towers at 6'0, he looks so small. "i can try, doll, but then i'll start to cry a lot, and that's just not what anybody wants-"

"richie." you say, effectively ceasing his rambling. it's cold in his room, bright white from the snow outside, and silent. he looks at you with huge eyes and a red nose.

but you don't know what to say. you’ve spent so long wanting to be heather, but now you've found out that richie's loved you this whole time. it hurts, but you can't wait another second being away from richie. 

you launch yourself towards him, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him down to your mouth.

this time, the kiss is warm, unexpected again but much more loving. it's a kiss that tastes like tears and love and trust, and all you can feel is richie as his hands find purchase on your cheek and back, pulling you so close to him that you can feel is rapid heartbeat.

he pulls back to mumble against your lips, "i'm so sorry." you shake your head, pressing another kiss to his and loving the feeling of richie against you finally. "i love you." you say, feeling his grin against your mouth.

"i love you so much." he says, pulling you lightly to fall onto his bed with him and tickling your sides.

you laugh lightly, swatting at his prodding fingers. "please stop crying." he whispers, laying above you with a small smile. you roll your eyes, "you stop crying rich." you retort, and he shakes his head, one of his tears falling onto your cheek. you jump from the feeling and wipe it away, sniffling a gasp and pulling him into a tight hug, his legs tangling with yours.

“i’m sorry.” he mumbles. you cup his cheeks so his lips pucker out and you smile at him, whispering, “i forgive you, rich. i love you.” and then you place a soft kiss to his lips and he kisses you back enthusiastically.  he pulls back and hugs you again, burrowing himself in your neck. 

"i didn't think i'd ever get you." he says, muffled by his face in your shoulder. "thank you for trusting me. i love you so much." he kisses your collarbone lightly and your fingers play through his curls lightly as you smile, eyes closing. you're so tired.

"i love you more, richie."

you fall asleep with richie curled up beside you, his breath light on your chest and arms clutching you against him. you fall asleep with richie’s lips on your neck, his legs entangled with yours. 

you fall asleep contently, knowing that you no longer have to wish you were heather.

tag list: @gabiatthedisco @blisshemmings​ @stenbrozier​ @simplesammyx​   @brxken-heartsclub​ @clownsloveyou​ @moon-shine-baby​ @daughter-of-the-stars11  @trashedfortozier​ @oceandog13​ @finnskindofwoman  @kait-tozier @upamongthestarss @fiantomartell @beverlyparkerr @beauregard-s @diorbubs @leighjaenikhowell @cowbellies @deepestofwaters  <33

#richie tozier x reader #losers x reader #losers club x reader #jewish richie tozier #bill denbrough x reader #stanley uris x reader #beverly marsh x reader #eddie kaspbrak x reader #ben hanscom x reader #mike hanlon x reader

[thweaty]

tomdaya tea ☕️

ok i have to submit this because it’s just TEW much to explain otherwise. like i said i stan them both so i been here for it all and know ALL the tea. i’ll give you the rundown of their relationship and then the drama that went down when she was dating jacob. there’s a whole tumblr timeline spanning years you can google if you’re interested in seeing it in detail but i’ll give you the basics. this is going to be a literal dissertation sorry in advance but i feel responsible for letting the general public know about the tomdaya agenda since i know so much

so they started dating in like aug/sept 2016 right after they finished filming homecoming. he went to canada right after to film another movie and during the course of filming she went to visit him and he flew to la to visit her, this is when people started getting sus. when he finished filming this movie he made an ig story about how he was going home to london to be with his family and spend the holidays with them, except he lied because he flew to la to see z and spend thanksgiving with her and her family lmao (he actually spent thanksgiving with her family 3 years in a row 2016-2018….more on that later tho 👀) her cousin exposed them when he posted a video on thanksgiving at her house and you could see her and tom cuddling on the couch. so everyone was like they’re 100% dating. like i said he was always flying to see her, he was going to workout classes with her mom and shit, he always stayed at her house in la (there’s multiple sets of photos of him outside her house with luggage). another thing that convinced people was sometime in early 2017 she made a whole snapchat story about how she was super sick and overworked and then after that accidentally posted a snap to her story that said “your sick girlfriend really loves you”. she deleted it quickly because it was obviously an accident and wasn’t meant to be public but people got screenshots. tom was also in nyc visiting z when she was filming the greatest showman and told a fan he met that he was in town visiting his girlfriend because he dumb. 

so at this point we KNOW they’re dating. zendaya is notorious for being extremely private with relationships, the guy she dated before tom she was with for 4 years and called him her best friend all along. she didn’t admit they actually had dated until after they broke up bc he cheated on her. so her being so private with tom and hiding it was expected. all this same shit goes on for the next nearly three years, they’re doing long distance but he flies to see her at least once a month sometimes more, they spend time with each others families, visit each other on set, etc. 

so this is where it gets interesting. tom is photographed on the euphoria set during a night shoot in like early may 2019. this is apparently right around the time they break up. tom’s best friend tuwaine was dating this girl audrey and when they broke up she started spilling tea on tomdaya (tom unfollowed her after this so it was def true). she said they broke up in may because they were fighting more due to long distance AND tom was tired of being so private, he didn’t want to be public but was over being so secretive and wanted to be a little more lax but she wasn’t comfortable with that. they decided to stay friends. the far from home press tour was in june and they were clearly still super close friends, nobody could even tell they were broken up cause they were so chummy (looking back now it’s more obvious cause tom was saying shit about his love life being a disappointment and stuff). they go their separate ways after the premiere but stay friends and continue to interact on social media, even months after the breakup tom met a girl at a con dressed like mj and asked if he could take a photo with her to send to zendaya so they were def still talking and stuff

fast forward to feb 2020. z is dating jacob and they’re being papped like every single day in nyc. pictures come out of them kissing out in the open in nyc. as a fan of z this was VERY weird to me because she’s always so private, but i was like maybe she’s trying something new because being so private caused the downfall with tom. BUT then she started DMing her fan accounts on twitter and ig asking them to take the kissing photos down (so idk what happened, she had to knew they were being papped but maybe she had second thoughts and regretted it)…. her fan accounts do delete the photos, but it’s too late. everyone has already seen them including tom, who is in the middle of a self-proclaimed instagram break. the day after the kissing photos came out, he goes back on ig and unfollowed two of z’s best friends, one being her assistant and basically brother darnell who tom was also good friends with. he posts a photo on his story of him drinking and puts emojis over his eyes and said something like “back for a minute, now i’m gone again.” he was going through it lmao so he literally went onto ig to be petty and unfollow people close to z because he was mad she was kissing her bf of a few months in public when they were together for nearly three years. and obviously he couldn’t unfollow her so he did the next best thing, and fans obviously took notice. a week later he followed darnell back cause i guess he realized how bad it looked but the damage was already done. tom and z from then on do not interact or acknowledge each other for the next SIX MONTHS. idk if they fought or if she was mad he unfollowed darnell or what. but it was MESSY. 

a month later tom starts dating this girl nadia, she moves into his house a few weeks into dating for quarantine. they date throughout those lockdown months. z breaks up with jacob sometime in june. she gets nominated for the emmy at the end of july, and days after she gets nominated her and tom start liking all of each others photos again. the assumption is he reached out to congratulate her and they made up. a few days after they start interacting again, tom posts a photo of his girlfriend on ig, and z likes it. tom and nadia break up like a week later 💀 he was filming uncharted in berlin at this point, him and z continue to interact, he finishes uncharted and flies right to atlanta to start filming spider-man. they’re still in atlanta now and we know they hang out all the time, but a lot of people think they’re back together because they’ve done some very 👀 things. her mom came to atlanta for thanksgiving and you guessed it… tom spent it with them (which we only know cause the celeb chef who cooked for them posted on his story that he made thanksgiving dinner for zendaya and tom holland. he then deleted and deactivated cause he realized he fucked up lmao). they started interacting with each other’s families and friends again. hunter (jules from euphoria) who is z’s best friend drove to atlanta to see her and her and tom followed each other. tom is very selective of who he follows and doesn’t even follow a lot of his costars so people were shook by this, especially because him and hunter met multiple times before but never followed each other. i have no idea if they’re back together, at the very least they’re good friends again, but i wouldn’t be surprised at all if they were. we’ll see what happens when they finish filming 👀👀👀 lmk your thoughts, questions, concerns etc. 

bitch my fave part was zendaya liking that pic and tom and his gf breaking up a week later 😭😭

#my GOD #submission #i kno this is a controversial topic but i love the drama SKNDF #thank u anon >:)

[animatedarchives]

idk if u thought i was Clarissa but it’s not 🥺🥺 I’m sorry!!! but could I plllllls request one with shinso where they’re bffs and shinso s current gf cheated on him so reader and him get together in attempt to make her jealous but they fall in love and like towards the end shinso is kinda angsty like “I’m acting weird because I love you!1!1!1!” Idk something like that 🥺🥺🥺 angst and fluff!!!!thank u for being so kind to me!!! Also take all the time u need! No rush (:❤️❤️

author’s note: HI BABIE sorry for mistaking you for someone else omg :(( please accept this piece as an apology (i split it into two parts and i’ll have part 2 out soon) i hope you like it!!! <3

ONE STORMY NIGHT

— 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐎 𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐒𝐇𝐈

genre: angst and fluff

warnings: mentions of cheating and a break up

word count: 2.9k words

The rain hit harshly against your window pane as you looked out at the stormy sky. It was currently 3am and you were wide awake, despite having training in approximately four hours. You’ve been trying to fall asleep for the past two hours but for some reason, your just body wouldn’t allow it. You groaned into your pillow and closed your eyes for what seemed like your tenth attempt to fall asleep. But something inside you was keeping you awake — a strange, unnerving feeling in the pit of your stomach that something was amiss in the world.

Just as you were getting into a comfortable position, you heard a pounding at the door and your eyes opened. You convinced yourself it was probably just the thunder, refusing to get up and answer it. You pulled the blanket over your shoulders and shut your eyes again. You had to get at least some rest before training or you knew you wouldn’t perform.

Just then, thunder crashed dangerously outside your window and your door swung open to reveal a figure standing in the doorway. Your eyes shot open and you bolted up out of bed, adrenaline coursing through your body.

Villains?! At this time of night? It was the perfect stunt, really — planning a sneak attack while everyone fast asleep and unsuspecting. Taking a defensive stance, you held your arms out in front of you, ready to attack the stranger if need be.

“Who are you? What do you want?” you questioned aggressively. The light from the hallway backlit their face, making it difficult for you to tell who it was.

“Relax, sunshine. It’s just me,” the silhouette said calmly, closing the door.

Sunshine?

“Toshi?” you called out into the darkness, your tense form relaxing slightly.

“Well, who else would have the key to your room?”

He paused, eyeing you protectively. “There better not be anyone else with the key to your room.”

Hearing his familiar voice, you sighed with relief and let your hands drop to your side.

You and Shinso have been friends for years now, having known each other since childhood. You guys lived in the same neighbourhood, went to the same school, and were even in the same class. You two literally grew up together and have been inseparable ever since. You knew each other inside out and could recite anything and everything about the other from the back of your hand. One of your favourite memories together though, was the day your quirk manifested — the day you got a nickname that would unknowingly stick for all the years to come.

You and Shinso were laying on the lush, green grass next to each other, basking under the warmth of the summer sun. The gentle breeze combed through your hair and you closed your eyes in ignorant bliss. All seemed well until suddenly, you felt something strange bubbling inside of you — a tide of energy that was threatening to overflow. You sat up and grabbed your right hand, your sudden movements garnering Shinso’s attention as he sat up with you.

Your eyes widened as warmth rushed to your fingertips, causing them to glow. Realising what was happening, you looked towards your best friend, who seemed to grasp the situation too. In fact, he looked equally if not more excited than you did. He had always idolised the idea of being a hero and couldn’t wait to have his own quirk. He watched eagerly with his large innocent eyes, honoured to be part of your special moment.

The glow intensified and slowly but surely, you were able to produce a small ball of light from the palm of your tiny hand.

“Look!” you gasped, eyes shining as your mouth gaped in awe. “It’s so bright!”

“Yeah! It’s like the sun!” Shinso beamed, pointing to the burning white sphere in the sky. Then, his eyes lit up. “I know! Next time when we become heroes, you should call yourself Little Miss Sunshine,” he suggested, practically radiating with enthusiasm.

“Okay!” you giggled. You liked the sound of that name. He knew you would.

“Well come on, Sunshine!” he said grabbing your free hand in his. “We have to show your parents!” he exclaimed, dragging you behind him as you squealed with excitement.

The tension in your body subsided as the intruder identified himself and you sat down on the edge of your bed. Ignoring the unpleasant squelching that filled the room, you pinched the bridge of your nose and groaned.

“Just because you have my key does not mean you can barge into my room at 3am in the morning!” you chided, rubbing the tiredness from your face. “Some of us actually do sleep, you know.”

It was apparent you weren’t going to bed any time soon, which made you feel very frustrated to say the least. “What on earth are you doing here anyway?” you sighed exasperatedly, wondering how much caffeine you’d have to down to be able to keep your eyes open in the morning.

Lightning flashed across the sky, illuminating your room and finally allowing you to see your best friend’s face for the first time that night. You paused, body frozen as your thoughts came to a halt.

Your gut was right: something was amiss.

Shinso was dripping wet, completely drenched from head to toe. Even though he was a good distance away, you could tell that he was shivering; his cold, wet shirt stuck to his body, perfectly defining each and every one of his muscles. You watched as a small pool of water gathered at his feet. Was he out in the rain? Your eyes wandered to his face, the same one you’ve known for all these years. His violet orbs were dark and tired — strangely more than usual. And as you looked more intently, you found an emotion swirling within them that tugged at your heartstrings: a deep-set sorrow.

“Toshi, what happened?” you asked as you approached him, eyes full of concern as you searched his face. His eyebrows were creased and a huge frown settled upon his soft, pink lips. Water glided across the crevases on his face, but you couldn’t tell if the wetness was due to the unforgiving rain or if it were something else. You hoped to God it was the former.

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He shut it again, trying to find the words to say. But he couldn’t. Or maybe he just didn’t want to. It was too painful to face the brutal reality of the world. If it were up to him, he wouldn’t tell anyone. He had a habit of bottling things up because he hated showing his true emotions. He hated being pitied. His whole life, everyone had ridiculed his dream of becoming a hero because of his brainwashing quirk. He would never forget their looks of sympathy as they shook their heads. “What a shame,” they would say. “You’d be a much better hero if you were born with another quirk.”

But you weren’t like the rest. You were never like the rest. You never cared about what type of quirk Shinso had; you loved him regardless. The day his quirk manifested, the rest of the children scrambled away in fear. Yet you remained at his side, holding his trembling body and comforting him as he cried in your arms. You were the only one who believed in his seemingly unreachable dream. You always gave him that small hope to cling on to when all seemed lost. He knew he could trust you. You were the only one he could be vulnerable in front of and safely lean on for support. You were his rock, his shelter in the storm.

He inhaled deeply. “We broke up,” he finally admitted. “She cheated on me.”

Even with the thunder crashing in the background, you could hear the heartbreak in his voice.

“Toshi… I’m so sorry…” you said as you placed your hand on his arm in an effort to comfort him. You could feel his tense muscles through the thinness of his wet shirt and the shaking that came along with it. Whether it was from the cold or the emotion, you couldn’t say for sure. Perhaps it was both.

“It’s okay,” he exhaled, straightening his posture to appear stronger than he felt. But you knew. You knew he was crumbling inside.

“No, it’s not,” you sighed walking towards your wardrobe. “I know you really liked her, Toshi. She must be blind to not see how good of a man you are,” you said, trying to conceal the venom in your voice as you pulled something out of the cupboard. You always hated her and never understood what he saw in her. But you knew how much joy she brought him, so you begrudgingly let it slide. You just wanted him to be happy.

“Well, I know you didn’t come here for nothing so if you want, I’m always here to talk,” you said, offering a gentle smile as you turned to face him. “But first,” you handed him a sweater and a pair of joggers. “Go change before you catch a cold.”

He smiled gratefully as he took them, your kind gesture reminding him how much you truly cared. He looked down curiously at the clothes, feeling the strangely familiar material between his calloused fingers. “Are these mine?” he chuckled lightly, eyes seeming to brighten just the tiniest bit.

You scoffed playfully. “Yes, and now I’m returning them to you,” you smiled, full of mock innocence. You borrowed it from him a while ago but had completely forgotten about it until now. You guessed it was good that you held on to it. “Hurry up before you get sick,” you ordered impatiently, trying to hide the worry in your voice.

He shook his head at your silly antics. “Yes, mother,” he said and proceeded to take off his shirt.

“OH MY GOD, NOT HERE YOU DUMBASS! THERE’S A TOILET FOR A REASON!” you exclaimed embarrassedly, trying to look anywhere but his magnificently toned body.

“Oh please, don’t act like you’ve not seen me shirtless before,” he replied nonchalantly. You sputtered, unable to come up with an adequate response. He was right, of course; you had seen him shirtless countless times before — hell, you’ve probably seen him full on naked as a child. However, that still wasn’t enough to rid you of the deep red blush you hoped so dearly would be concealed by the darkness of your room. You mentally slapped yourself. Relax. He’s just changing, it’s no big deal. Yet for some reason, you could not suppress the persistent feeling of something fluttering in your stomach. You shook your head vigorously, clearing your head. It was probably nothing. You guys were just best friends after all.

Right?

No longer sopping wet, he lay down on your bed, sighing with exhaustion. You sat cross-legged on the floor, letting him have the bed because he was having a bad day. You watched him wordlessly, waiting for him to start talking, but he never did. You didn’t want to push him, but you knew that you had to help him face his emotions if he was going to heal. It was going to be difficult, but you knew it was necessary.

“For the record, I always thought you were too good for her,” you broke the silence, not knowing what else to say. He smiled softly as he stared at the ceiling, contemplating your words.

“That’s funny, I always thought she was too good for me,” he laughed, but it was anything but joyful; it was cynical, bitter and sad. You couldn’t help but feel angry at her for dimming the light in Shinso’s eyes and making him doubt himself. To you, he was the perfect guy and there were so many things you loved about him. He was smart, observant, protective, respectful, caring — the list could go on forever.

But above all, he was insanely hard working and always pushed himself to achieve whatever he had set his eyes on. This applied to all areas of his life, whether it was how relentlessly he pursued the girl he loved or how he was always skipping out on sleep to train, just so he could master his quirk. He might have marketed it as nothing but an admirable trait on the outside, but you knew the hidden reason behind his fervor: doubt.

No one doubted themselves more than he did, especially with everyone questioning his dreams from the day his quirk manifested. His abilities were supposed to be a blessing, yet he saw them as nothing but a curse. Because of the constant self-doubt he harboured from such a young age, he was always his worst critic. You knew he was constantly pushing himself to prove to himself and others that he was worth something. You knew how hard he was on himself when he thought no one was looking. You knew that despite him putting in his best efforts, he always felt like it wasn’t good enough. Like he wasn’t good enough. And the thought that someone had given his doubts weight and made him feel like it was even remotely true when it wasn’t, sparked something within you. Anger consumed your mind as you watched him drown in hopelessness until finally, you reached your tipping point.

“Shinso Hitoshi, I will not sit here and let you mope about yourself! You are the most amazing guy I have ever met and any girl would be lucky to have you!” you exclaimed, hoping your words would get through to him.

“Well considering the fact that she cheated and dumped me, I’d say evidently not,” he said dryly. You deflated. You knew Shinso was the type who appreciated actions rather than just words but you didn’t know how—

Your eyes lit up as an idea hit you.

“I know! We’re going to show her what she’s missing,” you said.

He gave you a sideways glance, cocking an eyebrow. “And how exactly are we going to do that?” he asked.

“You sir, are going to date me.”

He blinked at you twice before laughing. “You can’t be serious,” he said amusedly. At least the smile he gave this time was genuine.

“Am I ever not serious?” you joked, hoping to keep this light mood.

He scoffed. “But you know I’d never date you, Y/N. You’re my best friend,” he said. It was true: you guys were best friends.

So why did the thought that he never considered you as anything more put a slight ache in your heart?

You brushed your thoughts aside, convinced it was nothing. “It’s pretend dating, stupid. Think about it,” you scooted closer to the bed, intent on selling your idea. You had to show him somehow that he was actually more amazing than he gave himself credit for.

“Imagine seeing her dumbfounded face as you stroll in class tomorrow with a new girl by your side, showing how unaffected you are and that you were able to move on faster than she ever expected you to. Plus, I know you don’t love talking to people, so this is perfect because everyone would be able to see it without you even saying a word!” you said. He watched as you gestured animatedly while giving your pitch, the ends of his lips slowly curling upwards.

“Consider it… silent bragging,” you suggested slyly, wiggling your eyebrows as you finished your speech. He turned to lay on his back again and draped his arm over his eyes.

“You know, considering my specialty is manipulating people, I have to say you are quite the snake,” he chuckled. You laughed as you punched his arm in response, not even putting a dent in his muscular form.

“So, what do you say?” you asked hopefully. His smile slackened as he weighed the pros and cons in his head. You waited eagerly for his response, excited to take your revenge on the girl who had hurt your best friend.

“Mmm, okay,” he hummed quietly.

Astonished that he had actually agreed to a plan you were half-joking about, you spread down happily on the floor and sighed with satisfaction. “I can’t wait to see her stupid face when she sees us tomorrow,” you grinned, eyes glinting with mischief. But as you mulled over it, you couldn’t help but wonder if you were forcing this idea on him. Although you’d do anything to help him feel better, you’d never want to force him into something he wasn’t comfortable with.

“Hey Toshi,” you called gently, wanting to double-check. But he didn’t respond. “Toshi?” you called again, sitting up slightly. That was when you realised he had fallen asleep. He must have been exhausted. You watched as his chest rose and fell at a steady pace, his face calm and peaceful. You smiled softly, wishing you could protect him against the pains of the world.

“Y/N…” he mumbled tiredly.

“Hmm?” you hummed in response.

“... Best friend hug…”

You giggled at his neediness and leaned over the bed to embrace him, inhaling the musky scent that exuded from his sweater. You leaned back and pulled the blanket up over his broad chest, letting him sleep on your bed for the night.

“She messed with the wrong people. We’ll show her tomorrow,” he said before drifting back to sleep. You smiled at his determination, your doubts put to rest.

“Goodnight, Toshi,” you whispered as you lay on the floor with your spare blanket, the storm continuing to roll in the background.

You finally shut your eyes as you prepared yourself for the day ahead.

The day when you would become Shinso Hitoshi’s fake girlfriend.

© written and published by animatedarchives 2020. please do not steal or repost. thank you.

#bnha imagines #bnha x reader #mha imagines #mha x reader #x reader #x reader imagines #x reader imagine #shinsou hitoshi x reader #shinsou imagine #bnha shinso hitoshi #hitoshi shinso x reader #mha shinsou #bnha shinsou #shinsou x reader #shinsou hitoshi #hitoshi shinso imagine #shinso x reader

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #407

“sugar pop, sugar pop, baby here i come, straight to #1″

Do you follow any special diet? (dairy free, vegetarian, gluten free etc.) No. What’s your favourite summer activity? Swimming is all I really enjoy about summer. Who was the first person to break your heart? It wasn't in a romantic sense obviously, but my dad. First band you obsessed about? I've only ever *truly* been obsessed with Ozzy Osbourne as a band, haha. First place someone took you on a date? I want to say a local skating rink. It was a group thing. How many doors are in the room you’re in? Two, if you include the closet door. Has anyone ever drawn a picture of you? Yes. Do you have any nieces or nephews? Quite a few. Which movie villain do you find the most terrifying? Well, if you've seen the scene where Pyramid Head literally rips a woman's skin off like a sheet in Silent Hill... u kno. I genuinely do find him to be a terrifying monster though, all bias aside. Humanoid monsters with ambiguous faces unsettle me. I wouldn't want that knife swingin at me, either. Do you get grumpy when you’re hungry? Yuuuup, I sure can. Do you stick your tongue out often in pictures? I have done that maybe twice in my whole life. Which one of your family members are you closest to? My mom. If chocolate was an illegal drug - would you be a drug addict? Nah. I'd be able to survive if it was illegal, but it would suck. Are you proud of your parents? Yes in some areas, no in some others. There are things both have said and/or done that I can't say I'm proud of them for, but overall, I am. Do you say “soda” or “pop”? "Soda." Are you shy about singing in front of people? YUP. I just don't do it. If you could get backstage tickets to ANY concert - which would you pick? Ozzy. :') It'd be fantastic to tell him thank you for his music that has always brought me joy and comforted me, and also let him know for sure just how strong he is and that it is absolutely not overlooked to still be nailing out an album while fighting Parkinson's. I'd probably start blubbering like a baby while rambling at some point, haha. Which is better: orange or grape soda? Orange. I don't like grape soda. Do you sleep with a sleep mask? Well, you could sort of call it that, ha ha. I have to wear an APAP mask to subdue my sleep apnea that causes wild nightmares/terrors. Do you like techno music? It's actually grown on me the past few months. Have you ever been drunk? No, I've never quite reached that point. I've only been tipsy. Are you mad at your best friend right now? Nope, got no reason to be. Do you know anybody with a pet snake? Yes, including myself. Is there any drink that you absolutely MUST drink cold? WATER. ABSOLUTELY WATER. I canNOOOOOOT do room temperature water anymore. It's gotta be pretty damn cold for me to drink it like it's nothin'. Have you ever painted anybody's nails aside from your own? No. Do you ever donate to the less fortunate? Mom likes to donate our old clothes and stuffed animals. Did you buy an American flag after 9/11 to put on your car/house/ whatever? I was a little kid when this happened, so. I don't know if my parents did. Honestly, do you have any Hilary Duff on your MP3 player? HA, I do. I love "Who's That Girl." When was the last time you had an ice cream sandwich? Wow, probably years... I really, really want one now, ha ha. Have you ever caught a friend cheating on their bf/gf? Well, my sister's friend, anyway. I was just sitting on the computer in the living room and there they were on the couch just casually making out. Do you enjoy doing math? Fuuuuck no. Do you think your mom has secrets she’s never told you? Oh, I know she does. There are things she's done that I know I have plenty of missing details from, but I don't ask because I know they're sensitive subjects. Do you own anything you don’t want your parents to know about? No. Do you pose in your pictures or just smile? I usually just smile. Do you use scented soap in the shower? Yes. It smells like cinnamon rolls and it is HEAVENLY. Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? No. Who was the last person you danced with? Enjoyable? Ha, Sara. Yeah. Dark or light colored jeans? Dark, 100%. I never wore light jeans. Can you take apart a computer and name all the parts? No sir. Can you take apart a car and name all the parts? That's an even bigger "no." Have you ever purchased a lotto ticket? No. What is the longest amount of time you've spent playing Monopoly? Idk. Have you ever witnessed a tornado first-hand? Thank fucking Christ I haven't. I am terrified of them. Have you ever colored your eyebrows? No. Have you ever taken another person's prescribed medication? Pain medicine, yes. Have you ever played golf (not miniature golf)? No. I'm not interested to, either. Have you ever gotten dressed with the windows open? I definitely don't believe so. Have you ever taken a shower outside? At the beach, yes. If you could call it a "shower." Have you ever been to a junkyard? No. Have you ever watched the History Channel willingly? No. If you could get the cell phone of your choice - what would it be? Probably a current iPhone. Apple is such a rip-off, but damn is the camera good lmao. Do you hand out candy to kids on Halloween? This will be my first Halloween in this house, so I really don't know if trick-or-treaters happen here. Do you like huskies? Love 'em, but I could neeeever own one with all that fur. What do you smell like? I'm always self-conscious over if I smell like sweat because of my hyperhidrosis. I hope not. Do you take your dog for walks? I don't have a dog. I used to take Teddy when he was younger, though. He loved those, but I stopped when I noticed his arthritis kicking in. Have you ever went paintballing? No. Seems stupid to me, honestly... Like that shit seems painful, so like, why??? What kind of movies are you drawn to? Horror and fantasy, mostly. I don't watch movies often. How often do you update your Facebook status? Just about never because I either just have nothing to say or am afraid of saying something stupid. I only ever share posts or pictures that appeal to me. What type of pet would you like to have? A Brazilian Black tarantula. :( I will whine about that until the day I get one, ha ha. I would also really, really like a plains hognose and a woma python. What breakfast are you most likely to have? Cereal. When you're starting to feel sick, you: It depends on what kind of "sick," but odds are I'm heading for the medicine cabinet. What colors are you most drawn to? Pastel ones. :') Light and pretty. What deadly sin are you most likely to commit? Sloth. When you're away from home, what makes you feel at home? "Having my stuff with me, like my laptop." <<<< Same. Do you prefer to lounge in a hot tub or swim in a pool? Swim. How many books do you have out in the public areas of your house? None. Who makes a better burger, in your opinion? Sonic. @_@ What do you like best about the holidays? Seeing my niece and nephew so excited. You think your eyes convey: Boredom, probably. Besides screaming for ice cream, what else do you scream for? If a bug surprises me by being on me. Well, depending on the bug. Do you like fried chicken? Noooo, it is so gross to me. What do you think of belly button piercings? They are SO cute imo. I want one, but I think it would look hideous on me. Maybe if I was actually thinner. Not saying bigger people can't wear belly button piercings, I just don't think it would look good on me. Do you like plain Lays potato chips? They're my favorite! I especially like the ruffled kind. Is there a big screen television in your house? In the living room, yeah. Would you rather no heat in winter or no A.C in summer? No heat in the winter, EASILY. I can't handle no A/C when it's hot. At least if you're cold, you can bundle up with tons of blankets. Have you ever had braces? I did for a long time because we couldn't afford to take them off. Do you do your own laundry? No, honestly. Mom likes to just do it all together, so I let her do it. Which do you prefer: English, Irish, or Australian accents? Irish. Is there anything on your bedroom door? Yeah! I got a "Meerkat Lover St." sign for my door. :') What is the best vegetable? Broccoli. Guys in eyeliner: Hot or not? That shit is h o t. Have you ever seen your favorite band live? No. :( Do you drink water or soda more often? Ugh, soda. Did you collect Pokemon cards back in the day? I didn't deliberately, but only because I was awkward about asking for Pokemon stuff because I thought people thought I was weird for being a girl and being obsessed with it. I think I got one pack. I really, really wish I'd been less self-conscious about that passion. Pet turtle: yay or nay? I'm personally not interested. Did anyone famous come from your town/city/school? Yeah, but I'm not sharing who. Have you ever seen a celebrity on the street? No. Have you ever pretended to be sick? To avoid school sometimes, yes. Can you ice skate? Never tried, too scared to. The blades terrify me. Do you have your nose pierced? No, but I want to have it redone. Do you loooove Tim Burton movies? I sure do! What arcade games do you like to play? I haven't been to an arcade in forever... but I liked the racing ones. What's the most expensive gift you've ever gotten for someone else? I'm not sure. Would you rather spend a whole day with your mom, or your dad? At this moment, probably my dad. We haven't hung out in a long time. What would you say if you found out your last ex was in a relationship? I'd be happy for her and tell her she'd better let me know if the person ever fucks up so I can kick some ass, ha ha. Are you easily confused? Very. I'm slow to understand things. Where was your MySpace/Facebook default taken? My bedroom. Can you whistle with your fingers in your mouth? No. I've never understood how that works. Do you like peanut butter? Love it.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''bubblegum bitch'' by marina and the diamonds

[golbrocklovely]

Yo Colby apperently sees everything because he goes on his Tabs on all social medias i mean he even typed his name on Amazon and found pillow cases of himself. So my question is, why is he refusing to acknowledge the BT stuff and act like all his fans are delusional. I get the majority of us may not know him personally but are we just supposed to ignore the victims. The snc fandom has gone down in recent months and they dont care to know why they just associate it to "hate" & "cancel culture".

alright, i have a feeling this is gonna be long, so bare with me.

TW: rape mentions, sexual assault, brief suicide mention, BT

so i've kinda wanted to put my two cents out about the whole colby not calling brennen out thing, but i never did bc i felt like i could possibly get hate or at least not explain myself well enough or something bad was gonna happen. but i feel like i can do this all now.

first off, i believe the girl that is accusing brennen. i also know that brennen has done some terrible shit in the past that i do not agree with. i don't like brennen at all and his half ass apology can suck a fat fuck.

that being said, i want to explain something that happened to me a couple years ago.

i was in college when i met this boy named R. he was probably the nicest guy i had ever met. he was so sweet and caring to me, and i needed that at the time bc i was extremely suicidal and needed someone to talk to. i had friends that went to different colleges in my state, but i didn't want to burden them with my bs. but one night i let lose on R about all of my shit. he was one of the few guys i had ever met that actually gave a shit about me and when he asked about how my life was going, he actually wanted to know and hear my answer. plus he was really charismatic, funny, and hot.

so, i instantly fell in love with him.

what sucked was that he was taken. but even tho he was taken, he would do things that personally felt really weird and questionable. honestly, if i had been his gf i would have counted it as cheating. he would flirt with other girls constantly, get really close to their faces (looking like he was gonna kiss them), say really dirty things, and dance in a sexual way with them. sometimes he would do all of this in front of his gf, and at the time, i felt like i should be calling him out. but, if he was doing it in front of her, and she wasn't saying anything, how am i to tell him he was wrong? maybe that was how their relationship goes... maybe it's open or something. i didn't know so i never said anything.

there was only one time he ever made me feel uncomfortable. he would drive me home, which was a really long drive (like 45-60 mins long) and the first time i went to get a ride with him, i stopped to think 'something could happen to me and there's no way i could stop it' bc i was really questioning him since he didn't want anything in return for driving me. i offered him money and he said no, and i don't trust ppl who are overly nice to me. this was the only time i thought something bad about him.

i met him my junior year. he was senior so he graduated. i go on to my senior year and see him once or twice bc he lived close to campus, and then i end up having to take an extra semester to finish up some courses. during this extra semester, i go to a house party with a bunch of friends, all girls btw. at the party we see him and i say hi. after a couple mins, one of the girls starts crying and i have no idea why. we end up going back to their house, and when i ask what's wrong, her roommates (one of whom i'm closer to than her) explain to me that while R was with his gf, he would cheat on her with this girl and one time when they were together, he coerced her to have sex with him (roommates words).

now the cheating wasn't unbelievable, but the sexual assault... that was a whole other thing. it didn't help that literally everyone that knew of this situation took it like it wasn't a terrible thing (literally they were rolling their eyes at their own roommate, who was one of their best friends, crying over R). but that being said, and i'm not proud to admit this, it took me a long time to believe this happened. i didn't outwardly think it didn't happen, but i just couldn't fathom someone i cared about, someone i loved, raped someone. i thought i knew R well. he helped me when i was at my lowest, was literally the sweetest person i knew. did he do some questionable things? sure. but rape? i couldn't believe it. but i believe it now bc i realize that all the red flags that he flew pointed to him being able to do something like that.

now to relate this to colby: brennen was there for him when he felt like he had no other friends bc sam was just starting to date kat. outside of the trap house, brennen is his other best friend. if a stranger told you your best friend sexually assaulted them, you're not gonna instantly believe them. bc assumingly, you know your best friend more than some stranger. this situation isn't easy in any way, shape, or form.

colby could easily be seeing everything we have been saying but he might not want to believe it. there’s no way someone he knows and cares about could do something as disgusting and evil as rape. plus, elijah daniels even said that brennen is a good manipulator so maybe he's manipulated colby (and the rest of the trap boys) to not believing anything the victim has said. i mean, he did it in his “apology” !! plus if he has said he's getting lawyers involved, then that "proves" he's innocent bc look how hard he's fighting against it.

i say all of this as not to excuse colby for not holding brennen accountable, but to maybe explain why he hasn't. if you personally feel upset at colby not unfriending brennen, that's 100% understandable and i agree with you. 

i just felt like maybe this was something that needed to be said.

and if you don’t agree with how i handled the situation back then, good. me neither. 

#ask #personal #colby brock #brennen taylor

[beautyinthediss0nance]

Tales from the Ex-Crypts Vol. 6

When I met the man who would waste my 20's, I was freshly moved out of my abusive/addict home and I will always feel that contributed to me being able to be sucked into his narcissistic web of manipulation, gaslighting, and abuse. The distance between us also made it very easy for him to do/get away with whatever he wanted...

The first 4 years of our "relationship" was very on and off.. he was massively hung up on his ex and she was constantly popping in to make sure she could still just wrap him back around her little finger. He would just disappear during those times, and then call me when she would fuck off again. I don't know why I went back, except he had some kind of hold over me, perhaps it was the comfortable/known factor. In those 'off' times are when I dated others.

So much happens in the span of so many years.. and crazy enough.. there aren't that many "stand out" moments, because the abuse was so normal..

He was very controlling, and expected me to call if I said I'd be home around a certain time. I remember one day, while living in the city and using transit, that I said I'd be home around a certain time. It was literally 4 minutes after the time I said, and he called me demanding where I was because I said I'd be home by then. I was walking across the street from the bus stop to my apartment building.

He was also very jealous/possessive, but as a girl who has almost always been "one of the guys", I have a lot of male friends. He was not super jealous of my friends, but he would get insanely jealous of men online (we gamed together, he got me into PC gaming, and WoW especially). I was not allowed to hang out with/make friends with/talk to other men in game. I still made some amazing friends (who are still friends now). He was also fond of shaming/embarrassing/belittling me in front of others, or showing his ownership or whatever. He would openly treat me like shit, but if anyone else ever said anything even slightly negative or criticizing about me, he would rip them to shreds. One girl in his guild, after witnessing his treatment of me over Ventrillo (a voice program many gamers used back in the day, now it's mainly Discord) and who stupidly had a crush on him, decided to rip on me to him. I'm guessing she read him wrong and thought his treatment of me was because he wasn't happy with me, or didn't love me. He destroyed her so badly, she quit the guild and left the server. He was the asshole that women flocked to and fawned over, and I couldn't even say I was any fucking different. That "bad boy" aura sucked many in.

He was jealous/possessive because he was always cheating on me, with the distance, he was easily able to. The stupid thing was, that he'd brag about it to our guildmates while I was at work/offline. Probably part of why he didn't want me making friends within the guild as well. I don't think he realized this is what made a lot of those who became friends to reach out to me. They were being kind to the kicked puppy.

Most of the shit treatment happened in the last 4.5 years of our relationship, without the "off" times of the first 4 years. But most of the really great times we had together happened during that time too. He could be amazing and sweet and funny... and even with distance, we did spend 4-6 hours talking/hanging out daily.. more than most of my friends who got to see their boyfriends regularly.

The final straw for me, after all of the years of distance, and not moving to the next level with excuse after excuse, was that my sister was getting married and he refused to come to the wedding with me. I was just done at that point, and ended things.

He lost his mind, I don't think he ever expected me to leave, but I just needed to get to a point where I loved myself more than I loved him. The one benefit of the long distance relationship was that my life really didn't change after the relationship ended, minus the hole left where he used to fill my time/thoughts.

Unfortunately, his father passed away within days of my ending things. It was sudden, a heart attack during a blizzard that prevented the ambulance from getting to him in time. He was only in his 50's. My ex was devastated, understandably. He called me 30+ times and I thought he was just being a rage monster so didn't answer. I finally listened to my voicemail(s) and he was bawling in them. This is a man I knew never cried, so I immediately called him. His mother answered, she was at his place to try to comfort him, and he was a mess when he got on the phone. He wanted us to get back together because of his loss. I am sure that the double whammy of our break up and the loss of his father within days of each other was overwhelming, but I told him it was the wrong reason to get back together. I also told him I would be there however he needed as a friend, but he insisted it was the perfect reason to get back together. I told him it wouldn't fix any of the reasons we broke up, and without those things addressed, then there was no reason to get back together and have it work. He hung up on me, because I didn't give him what he wanted and he was hurting. I never blamed him, but stuck to my requirements. I told him over and over that if he wanted me back, he would make his actions meet his words, and drive to my place, knock on my door and sit down and talk like two fucking adults and sort our shit out. That was the ONLY way I would consider getting back together. He never did.

We tried to be friends after the break up, it took us 3 years to achieve it. For the first three years, he would rage whenever it became clear he had zero control over me and not talk to me for weeks/months and then come back.

We then had a great friendship for years after he finally got past that (and got a new gf). We no longer have that friendship though, as he is absolutely insane. He is obsessed with sending voice messages instead of typing/texting. Over the years he had gotten me to get numerous different apps to do so. I deleted most of them because they didn't detect my soft voice so I couldn't respond and it was useless. I have an iphone, he had an iphone, he could send me voice messages that way, but would have to wait for responses until I had time to listen to them (usually after I got home from work) and then would get miserable that I wouldn't respond right away, even though we were just friends at this point.

The last app he asked me to get was Telegram. I hate this app, it is not user friendly and it didn't work well for my non-neurotypical brain to function with. I deleted it almost immediately, told him it made me want to punch babies. He lost his mind over me not liking an app, to the point you'd think it was HIS app that he created. Fast-forward to about a year and a half ago. I had forgotten about the stupid app, started talking to some guy on a dating app who asked if I had it, I said no, they asked me to get it so I did... and then immediately remembered it was the app I hated as soon as I opened it. My ex noticed in the 30 minutes max that I had it installed and messaged me, I responded and said "I'm deleting it again, don't get used to me using it" and deleted it.

He left me 4 raging voice messages on iMsg that were each over 3 minutes long about how I was such an absolutely horrible human (I listened to the first 20-30 seconds of the first message and then deleted the message thread) because of an APP. I was the crazy one because I didn't like an app, and somehow that made me a bad human?? Yeah... sure buddy.. pretty sure it's not normal to get that mad over someone not liking an app (especially when I had deleted many over the years). No idea why he is so obsessed and in love with that app, but we have since deleted every contact with each other and have not spoken since December 2019.

#talesfromtheexcrypts #vol 6 #8.5 years of bullshit #why was I so young and stupid #ugh #can't get time back #dodged a bullet #even if I thought he was *the one* #oh well #life goes on #and this is why I will never settle #can't believe I almost ended up with someone like this forever #and thought it was love

[gelo-p]

Cycling Seasons, Fresh Skies: Memories

I knew from a long time ago that if I’d ever go for a T10, this would be it. When the event was finally getting closer, early estimates told me I was 900 flames short; I’d have to buy stars for this event.

(WARNING: A rather image-heavy post)

Perhaps the moment I honestly considered T10 instead of settling for T100.

Definitely the moment I knew there was no turning back. :)))

Believe me, this was not the only purchase I made for this event.

I needed a better Challenge Live team, so I knew getting a 4* Happy Ran is required, to complete my Happy Afterglow team. I’ve never gotten any 4* Ran before, so thank god the 4* Exchange Ticket had the perfect timing.

“WAIT. YOU WERE USING A HAPPY TEAM ALL THIS TIME???”

Yep. ^^ Well, my Multi Live team was Powerful Afterglow-based, but had only 2 4-stars, sooo I knew it wouldn’t cut it.

There she is <3

I’ve always stopped at Skill Level 4, but I really had to pull out all the stops. Ran is my first Skill Level 5 member. ^^ (everyone in my CL team also received the level 5 upgrade)

Alright, let’s do this! Hey Hey Hoh~!

The event has finally begun! I initially found it amusing seeing all sorts of titles being shown off. This one in particular stood out to me. XD

(Looking back, that Sinz person would later turn out to be a serious T10 contender. I think they changed their name to Pyokun after some time)

Here’s a screenshot of a rare T5 GeLö-P. I really wanted to share this with you guys, but I figured I’d jinx myself by revealing publicly what I was trying to do. :>

(I will doubt the existence of God Almighty, but believe in being jinxed. Life is weird sometimes.)

Well, that’s the Grand Room for ya’. Meta songs all the way~

How do you even react to that?

With this. :)))

NEXT YOU’LL SAY FUEEEEE

Home Street...

Home Street.......

HEY HEY HOH~! 

The moment I ran out of large energy drinks, and had to start spending stars. </3 Small energy drinks were still reserved for moments I can afford to wait out the 30-minute refill timer.

The 5 Horsemen of the Apocalypse

My first time doing the “recover waaaaay more than 10 flames” thing

Huhehe huhehe huhehe...

I too would like some of those Afterglow pins. T_T

Baby Shak my as-

Aaaand we have a dodger, ladies and gentlemen. XD

I think this guy needs to be banned.

Home Street? Pssh, that was so yesterday. Jumpin’ is the shit now.

Ganbatte, P5.

Himari~

My 2nd encounter with Ghostkillers (who later become T12..?). He chose Senbonzakura the first time, so when he did it again, I thought I’d save it for posterity. ^^

The “I too would like to live dangerously” gang 8-)

The first time I switched away from my dua T100 titles. I figured I’d stop trying to “scare” the competition.

First time tracking T10 scores. This would later prove to be very useful in seeing if my projection will hold (although I shifted to tracking T3 - T12).

Taking a break, so I watched ads for free flames. :)))))

Moca, Ran, GeLö-P, and a weird name. Huh. Okay.

Kyu~Mai * Flower was released! Played this one on Hard.

...this one I played on Expert...

...and thank fuck I got it first try, because oh boy I’m not playing that beat map again. >_<

“Ban me if you can” ?? Why??

Aaaaand this motherfucker right here was cheating and inflating his score. I personally reported him to the game admins over on twitter, and they’ve informed me that they were already aware of this idiot. Saw him just once more after this.

Yes. That’s 91 million, 798 thousand, 346.

I actually encountered them once before this, but didn’t notice anything off about their score (was already dazed at that time). And then a discussion started over at reddit, so when I met him again, I took screenshots.

Ganbatte :))

Had time for a quick hey hey hoh spam ^^

Which day was this..? Anyway I came up with my brilliant pun. Read the comment, see if you can figure it out. :3

MocaRan and YukiLisa. Sigh. I don’t think we can be friends, P5.

:)))

Told you, Ghostkillers only pick Senbonzakura XD

Tomoe’s Birthday! ^^

Even the game won’t let you have a GF, P5. XD

HEATHCLIFF STOP PICKING BABY SHARK

(almost sure they’re famous in the competitive scene... I don’t know them tho LOL)

I woke up one morning to find there was no internet.

FUCK ME

I knew mobile data was going to result to multiple disconnects, but thank fuck I had lots of challenge points to spare. I passed the time productively, and by the time I was done, internet was back. Whew.

Rank update: currently T8. ^^

More of Ghostkillers x Senbonzakura and JFC that name tho P2

Shitpost comment XD

First time seeing 2 other T10 contenders in the same room: Itsuki and Ghostkillers.

Probably the point where I started spamming Tokimeki Poporon instead of Home Street.

Also there’s a looot of interesting names in Bandori.

As a YukiRan / MocaLisa shipper (well more of SayoLisa nowadays), it is my job to destroy players 1, 3, and 5. >:(

Wallet: IT’S NOT POSSIBLE

Me: NO, IT’S NECESSARY

...aaaaaand I immediately threw away 10k stars hoping for Megane Ran, but got shit. (This would later force me to make 2 more purchases XD Seriously though, I could have saved a lot of money with a better star purchase plan)

I got Loli Rinko tho. <3

Which day was this...? I think this was the moment I knew Ghostkillers has given up. I was laughing my ass off reading the comments. I think everyone of us was half-dead at this point. XD

And so we’re down to the final 11.

I’ve started considering the possibility at this point that I might be the final one to bow out.

OMG I CAN’T SEE PLAYER 2

BUSHIDO~!

I was feeling the despair at this point, and thus started singing Komm Susser Tod

I do mini-sprints in the morning, so I’m T6 here. I usually fall back down to ~T9 in the afternoon.

I usually level up once per event. I started this event from Rank 193. :)))

(well it was technically 192, but I was like 2 games away from leveling up)

XD

There are no experts in this room :v

Jumpin = NO FEVER, but picks meta song anyway. Okay. :v

Hey! All Random!

Game: DID SOMEONE ASK FOR A META SONG

I have a lot of friend requests at this point (probably from people seeing me on the T10 list), but I don’t have enough space to accept them all :((

Bread-themed profile!

Poppin’ Party, Puff n’ Pastry... get it?

Itsuki started spamming BOF at this point.

Doki doki~

HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME~ ♪ ♫

P1 is an IRL friend :))) I’d later tease her about how slow she is picking songs LOL

Some Initial D reference for overtaking :P Of course I was badly falling behind at this point (T9 is hella dangerous), but I had no choice but to continue to believe in the math (and that early overtaking is a bad choice).

“Early moves lets your opponents recover from mental shock.” - Ryosuke Takahashi, Initial D 3rd Stage

No seriously, that’s exactly what I was thinking of. And also “Not yet, not yet, now” from Ford v Ferrari.

P1 & P5 get married already...

FINAL NIGHT.

I’m down to T11, and everybody else already did 2.3M-sprints some hours earlier, and have considerably slowed down.

I, on the other, was about to go to sleep. Yes, I, the current T11, was about to let the others pull away. All I could do was believe in the Math at that point, because let me tell you-

I had 105k challenge points left. That’s 3.4M event points I had yet to sprint.

This was during the final morning, 9 hours before event ended. When I woke up that morning, my heart was pounding like crazy. What if everybody has pulled ahead?

When I finally checked, most of the T10′s were still in the 17M-range. Itsuki was on T10, and he was only 500k away. I knew at that point that my chances were pretty good; however, I shut up about it, set my comment to “Now Playing: Running in the 90′s”, and got to work.

There was nothing else I could to but consume all the CP I had left. No more tracking. A literal 5-hour non-stop sprint to 19.2M points. If they can still catch up even after they’ve already expended their CP yesterday, then maybe I don’t deserve this T10 after all.

All I need to do was beat one of them. It was me or them.

Holy shi-

I wasn’t out of the woods yet, had to make sure at least one of them didn’t overtake me. Of course that was more up to them, since I didn’t have any strength left (my thumb stopped working at that point, no seriously, it’s still not working properly even today). I also didn’t have any significant stars left.

I managed to sneak in a few songs, but that was it. I was done. The others managed to close the gap, but I stayed in T6.

And then the event was over.

I fucking did it.

------

I would later learn that this was the bloodiest (Challenge Live) event in the history of ENdori. In one redditor’s words, I “ ...sure picked a hell of a time to go for it.”

I had no choice. This is Megane Ran we’re talking about. <3

I had some idea tbh, because I managed to read a tweet in the middle of the event, that “this was one lit T10″. Apparently we were on track to beat the previous record-holder, which was Sayo’s Umbrella event.

I’m... really glad to have been part of this event. I feel so darn proud of myself. >:3

But I couldn’t have done it without the help of the Grand Room. Seriously, I only played in the Grand Room.

Remember this?

I don’t have (competitive) friends. :))) So thank you, all. *bow*

I’d like to thank IRL-friend otearaisu over at twitter for putting up with my excessive score projection updates. XD I have a really detailed excel sheet to check if I was on track or not, and whenever there were developments, I’d always tell him about it, even in the dead of the night. XD

------

Would I ever do this again? Probably not. This was the only event that I knew I really wanted to go for, and I don’t see that changing any time soon. Maybe I’ll get a couple of T100′s in the future, but that’s it. ^^

See you in the lobby~

#bandori #bang dream #cycling seasons fresh skies #garupa #event

[gwilymz]

omg tell us about the boy drama (only if you want to) any hot guys who looked like 70s rockstars?

this is a longgggg ass story but here we go ... so i downloaded tinder at the beginning of summer just to mess around. i met this guy who was really cute and we dated for about a month and we really just hung out and made out and it was really hot and stuff but i just got bored of him because he really didn’t have much of a personality lmao (😳😳🥴) so i broke up with him the day after my birthday. then i had to go to college orientation and i matched with this cute boy on tinder and he was in my best friends orientation group so we started talking for a little but nothing really happened. but when i got back home, i went to work (i work at a pool) and i saw this superrrrr hot guy and i kinda stared at him a lot and then eventually he asked for my number and my snap and we started talking. we went on a cute picnic date and then a few days later we went to the zoo and then watched stranger things camped out in my car and things got STEAMY and we made out for so long and he gave me a fatass hickey that literally took weeks to fade. turns out he was a douche because he was dating another girl the whole time and i didn’t know ( :::: so about a week after that fiasco i’m on tinder on the way back from a day trip to chicago and i match with this super cute guy and we have literally everything in common. we talked nonstop and i really thought there was something but the gag was..... he lived like 2 hours away from me. so we both agreed we’d meet up (in a public place of course) and when i did i just wasn’t feeling the vibes and he was a douche too (he left his shoes in my car for some reason and i left with them and still have them might fuck around and sell those hoes) ... but flashback to BEFORE my chicago trip... me and my friend go to the skatepark to scope out some sk8r boys and we’re just kinda watching everyone and this guy zoooooms up to me and asks for my number and he’s very sweet and very persistent so i give it to him eventually. he kept telling me how he wanted to date me super bad and i was becoming really into him like we made out a lot and went on a couple of dates and THEN. and THEN he has the audacity to tell me we just need to be friends because of his past relationship where his gf cheated on him. so now i’m in this weird ass relationship with skater boy where we’re just friends but he flirts with me and calls me cute all the time but also he’s impossible to talk to because we all know skater boys have deepset psychological issues but man won’t tell me what the hell the issue is. and the other gag is that me and him both leave for school in a week 😎✌🏼

#personal #drama #ask #boys #are #trash #but fun summer tho

[jays-system]

story..about a guy I love..

***THIS IS JUST MY SIDE OF A STORY/RANT, HE HAS HIS OWN, DO NOT GO HATING ON ANYONE THAT IS MENTIONED IN THIS BLOG*** I was not going to do this..even sitting here and typing this out is making my mind a cluster fuck..but I have to, right? I’m in love..truly deeply in love..its a all consuming love, a love that I can’t get out of even if i want to.. This past month I have been spending time with a guy, a really caring and gentle guy..we spent mostly everyday on call to each other..texting, hanging out in chat rooms on imvu, sending memes to each other and laughing with each other. pretty much just spending every day with each other..it was lovely..nice..I had never been so..inlove..with anyone then I am with this man.  lemme give you a bit of a backstory as to how our friendship/relationship fell apart and how we met.  Meeting: so this story runs through the one i previously posted about my ex, if you haven't read it go read it here https://pawhe.tumblr.com/post/188806768733/my-ex-and-her-horrible-ways, I met this guy threw my ex about 6+ months ago, I hated this guy from the moment I had met him, he was constantly yelling at me or being a big ass cunt to me, he had reasons to and these reasons are understandable, he was just trying to do right by his friend *my ex gf*, she would go to him and complain about me for shit I didnt even do, always made me seem like the bad guy, which of course made his opinion of me bad, in his defense he didn’t know any better as he didn’t know me, he never even knew what I was REALLY like. I never gave him a chance to know me..I thought he was just a prick the whole time, until recently. The past month: we stopped hating each other and some how we became friends, he made me smile one day and then ever since then I wanted to get close to him..to know him..so as I said before we spent alot of time together, and when you are attracted to someone you genuinely catch feelings for someone even if you try not to..and that is what happen. we caught feelings for each other, I admitted my feelings to him, my ex gf found out and had a tanty over it, it literally was “forbidden”, he admitted he was falling for me, I felt happy that he was..but at the same time I KNEW that things were about to get really..dicey. both of us admitting to each other brought a whole lot of drama and hell on us, we still go threw hell..but it was worth it. I got use to falling asleep on call to this man, everyday I found myself falling more and more in love with him and I couldn’t stop it, I got attached, as did he. he was dating this guy who tried to keep us apart, he would constantly tell Keaton to block me, to stay away from me and not talk to me, of course Keaton never listen to him, an ex of his literally caused so much hell for him..and “us”, always constantly begging for him to not “be” with me, threatening to do bad shit to herself, so pretty much everyone caused alot of hell for us, even myself included.. I am a depressed human, I always have been since I was a youngling, this path month has been especially bad, I wanted to end my life, I have attempted to in many ways, man all i wanted was to be with the guy I love. Last week: I went to hospital because I was having bad thought of self-harm, this man stayed with me, didn’t leave my side..he is a really caring man.. Friendship hell: I don’t want to make him seem bad because I CANT stress this enough, HE IS A REALLY NICE GUY, but he also..is..troubled. hes been threw hell from past relationships, hes always been hurt, left, cheated on, lied to, which in results makes it hard for him to let ANYONE close..even if he loves them. he would constantly be..in a rage, mad at everyone..everything, and even tho I tried to make him happy and smile..I was always fucking up, hurting him, saying stupid stuff, in result he treated me..with a indifference, he would say he loves me but ignore me for hours, yell at me, blame me for things, ignore my text/calls,  I would cry myself to sleep every time we were fighting, I even tried to hurt myself over this, my heart was literally breaking..my whole world was falling apart.  I was prepared to wait years..if it took that to show him I love him, to show him I wouldn’t leave him, no matter the pain, the hell, the hurt I went threw.. Yesterday: he blocked me..on EVERYTHING, because I was constantly treating my ex gf cold, with hate, because I DO hate her, she fucked my life and my heart up, she broke me, then she tried to stand in the way of me even being remotely happy..everyone tried to.  Today: I miss him alot, I wish I could call with him, hear the voice I love, the laugh I’d do anything to hear.. I want to be with this man, more then anything I’ve ever wanted, I’d do anything for him, He makes me feel whole..he blocks out every bad thing that has happen to me and makes me feel happy, a happiness I’ve never felt before. I WILL ALWAYS love this man, no matter the circumstances.. this blog was supposed to be of like our whole relationship but in all honesty..he didn’t do anything wrong. we are both at fault, we let it get this bad..we failed each other. I can only hope that one day..I can have him..but until then..this is how I felt..and some what of what happen, like i said this is only my thoughts and views on what happen, he is a GOOD man, and he doesn’t deserve any hate or criticism.. THANK YOU FOR READING~ got any questions? post them to my “ask me” TAB~  ~Jay 

#imvu #imvurelationships #love #love unconditionally

[studying-mostly]

Who do u ship ur mutual s with question mark ALSO WAIT WHY ARE THERE NEW POSTS ON UR BLOG I HAVENT SEEN YET

Alright, this took me,,,,,way too long because I figured, I might as well be thorough

So, DISCLAIMER: i changed the ask a bit; instead of who I ship you with, because I only know their stage personalities and the image they present, I instead went with who i think your vibe would get along really well with. You’ll see me using phrases like “someone like (name)” to help emphasize that this is rlly based off of the image they present ALSO in some cases, I didn’t pair you with your bias and that’s because, while I think you’d get along with your bias, I thought that you’d be more compatible (romantically or platonically) with someone else (sharpen your pitchforks elsewhere, these are the hills i choose to die on)

SECOND DISCLAIMER: I separated this into two categories; since most of my mutuals are my mutuals through Ateez, I’ll do one “ship” with someone in Ateez, and then an additional “ship” with someone else (all based on groups I know, so it’s a bit limited; if you want me to look into girl groups for you to see what I find, I’m more than willing to do that!) And, this is mainly for the mutuals that I interact with mainly because I’m able to give a more confident answer on who I think they should gravitate towards, I’ll probably update this post as I interact more (if you want to be added, msg me!)

Alright, so let’s get started

@jongholover:

1) Ateez ship: (drum roll please) WOOYOUNG : Okay so hear me out. I thought about someone like Jongho but honestly, I think you’d fit better with someone like Wooyoung. Someone a little bit more playful without being shy, and caring in a way that matches yours. You're both emotional people, but whereas for some pairings that'd be problematic, it's something that I think is crucial: someone emotional would understand you. The best example for why I chose Wooyoung was the mafia vlive, where he was tapping San's hand and being mischievous, and that fits you really well. For some people, I’ve paired them with someone who is a bit of their opposite, but I feel like you’d be most comfortable with someone who’s like you, someone who gets you without much worry and I think the person Wooyoung projects to be matches that really well, with just enough difference to keep it as a “match” rather than a “mirror”. 

2) Misc: Jeno from NCT ; so this is a little bit more of your opposite, but I have the gut feeling that if you were to find someone like Jeno, you guys would get along really well ; he seems to be a little bit more on the quiet side which balances you out, while still being aware of those around him, which matches you quite a bit. It’s still someone similar to you, but with a little bit of variance (But out of these, I think someone like Wooyoung fits you much better)

@yunhos-gf

1) Ateez ship : (she’s gonna kill me) Yeosang!  I think that you would get along amazingly with someone like Yunho, so I definitely want you to know that I absolutely see you with someone like him, but I think in terms of compatibility, you’ll feel at ease with someone like Yeosang. His bit of shyness would keep yours in check without feeling like you have to do something grand to prove yourself. Also there’s that little bit of opposites with his “quietness”, but he’s still playful enough that I don’t think it’d alienate you. At the end of the day, someone like Yeosang and Yunho came in at a tie, so I think it really depends on what type of person you’re looking for at that moment: someone a little quieter, or someone a little bit more goofy

2) Misc ship: Juyeon from the The Boyz: So, I already told her this, but it’s gonna be the hill I die on. Whereas with jongholover above, I said that the Ateez ship fit better, I’m saying that someone like Juyeon fits better than Yunho or Yeosang. He’s again on the quieter side while still having a sense of humor, which I think is crucial for you, but he also has a steadiness that I think you would pair really well with. Someone like Juyeon I think is bound to motivate/inspire/enamor you in some way or form. The simplest answer is that his vibe may not mirror yours, but it’s one that pairs really well with yours anyway. I also feel like you’d do best with someone “steady” without them being a leader, per se, and that’s exactly where Juyeon is. Passionate without being extremely in your face passionate, and more of a tempered sense of humor; I will die on this hill but find someone like Juyeon and prove me right

@shining-universe 

1) Ateez ship: Yunho! So here was another ship where, instead of going with someone of your opposite, I’m going with someone that more matches you. I think that honestly, you’d feel best and fit best with someone bubbly and goofy and bright and in ateez, that’s Yunho hands down. But he’s not the only sunshine of the group so lemme explain ; Yunho is very bubbly and playful without it being “”savage””, and his type of humor fits yours extremely well. Also, big heart needs another big heart; someone like you with someone like Yunho is basically the sunshine pair

2) Misc ship: (i’m gonna cheat here because lbr,,,what else was I going to put) Shinwon from Pentagon!  This was a no-brainer. Yunho might actually be too bubbly/bright for you, and that’s where someone like Shinwon comes in. Another sunshine, but definitely more on the caring side. And when I say caring side I mean heart bigger than body ; you guys literally care so much about the people around you while still being so passionate about what you believe in. There's a lot of overlap regarding wanting to improve the lives of others (whether through music or education) and that's something that I think you gravitate towards; you need someone with a heart as big as yours, without it being overwhelming. When I think of Shinwon, I think of a big heart and an endless amount of care for those close to him and that matches you perfectly! Again, I think you’d be most comfortable with someone like you, and Shinwon is it (there are some differences, but it’s more in terms of balancing rather than polar-opposites). Overall, he’s someone that fits you pretty damn well (also catch the endless giggling and quiet moments but also,,,hmmm,,, concert dates?) so my advice; find someone like Shinwon!!

@cutieyeosanggie

1) Ateez ship: Hongjoong! So this one was super difficult, because while I think you’d get along with all of them really really well, in terms of who I think matches you best,,,,it gave me a lot to think about, but I finally settled on Hongjoong and I think someone like him would fit really well. I can hear the confusion already ; at first, I hesitated putting you with a leader because of a variety of factors, but I think his passion and quiet determination would be a really good match for you; not quite your opposite. This is a pairing where I think both you and someone like him would come out a little bit different than before you met, in the best way. Ultimately, what made my decision was how caring he is towards his members, and how supportive and that’s something that I think fits really well with you overall ; find someone who matches how much you care, whether they’re your opposite or you’re mirror and I think it’ll be a really good match

2) Misc ship: I.M. Monsta X / Vernon Seventeen ; okay so, i’m pretty you’re the only mutual who i gave three ships and that’s because I really could not decide between Wonwoo or I.M. I think it genuinely comes down to whatever you’re looking for at that moment, but it was important to me to pair you with someone outspoken, has a little bit of “edge” to them, and someone extremely passionate, despite being a little quiet. Someone like that, who both IM and Vernon tend to present as, would fit really, really well with you. The outspokenness is critically important for how active you are in your community and you are literally so, so passionate that it was crucial to find someone who seems just as passionate ; the little bit of edge comes into, what i think might be, your personal preference. Pairing you with someone like the sunshine member, or the cutesy type was an absolute no-no for you. Additionally, I.M. and Vernon both tend to present as sort of the quiet types (lol Vernon, quiet, but stick with me, he also has that dry wit that i think would pair really well with yours) but they’re also readily able to be totally silly in a way that fits yours silliness rather than say someone like Jinyoung from GOT7 and that’s something that I think would balance well with you

@gothicmingi

1) Ateez ship: Mingi! Honestly, I debated pairing you with someone like San but this is one of those occasions where I’m going with your bias. In all honesty, Mingi’s sense of humor definitely fits yours; a little less wit per se and little bit more genuinely comedic and silly ; your sense of humor is one that I really wanted to match because it’s literally the first thing i think of when I think of you and finding someone ready to laugh at a moment’s notice was a must ; someone like Mingi with you would be more of the pairing that joking poke fun at each other rather than say how you actually feel and it works (that’s less Mingi and more what i genuinely see you for but whatever) another really important quality to me was his determination. it’s a little less intense than Hongjoong’s. I think putting you with someone determined is important because I can see that being a pairing that inspires/motivates you

2) Misc ship: Mark from NCT ; Laughy 99liner boy!! I think that honestly,,,,you’d work better with someone like Mark than with someone like Mingi. The humorous personalities match up and I can see this being a pairing that’s basically like being best friends. Pairing you in a more best friend dynamic i think fits perfectly, and mark has that vibe of working rlly well with you; you’re both so ready to laugh and have a good time, but in a brighter way than say, Lucas. I think Lucas might be a little bit too much for you, but anyway, back to Mark. Additionally, his determination and hard work!! Going back to the points above, that’s something that I think you’d gravitate towards, whether because you see yourself reflected in it or because that’s something you aspire to be, either way, i see this working out rlly rlly well. He’s also a leader, from dream, without being a Leader (like Taeyong) and having that middle ground between still being playful and childish without the vast responsibility and seriousness from being a full-time leader would keep the serious side of him from alienating you. Hopefully this has made sense so far, but find someone like Mark! I think it’d work really well!

Alright! so those are the mutuals I’ve had a lot of interaction with, and as I’ve said at the beginning of the post, I’m totally willing to keep this updated! (and, if you’d want a girl group pairing, just msg me and I’ll do some research!)

@jongholover this literally took me so many days to think about and mull over and y’all best appreciate my deep thoughts into basically the type of person I think you’d work well with

(remember me fondly, i typed so much)

#scorepio #3oz #mutuals #ateez #svt #nct #monsta x #pentagon #if reeta decides to ask any of you guys this same question u best remember me and my biases fondly insert emojis #nah i rlly wanted to do this justice bc i have thoughts #and i love yall so also like #not @ my matchmaking skills but @ my matchmaking skills find someone like who i paired u with and lemme know how well it worked

[sunyoonandstars]

BTS Reaction 6: They realize they have feelings for you but are in a relationship (!smut!)

So, this is based on the following request:

I hope I managed to meet the requester’s expectations — and all of yours, of course. This was actually kind of intense to write because I’ve been in a similar situation with a guy before (but who hasn’t, really?) but also lots of fun. Sorry, I took some liberty and it probably (very likely) turned out a little more smutty than requested here and there. But what’s a girl to do…? The boys just send my imagination running wild and I might have gotten a little carried away … Can’t help it. Sorry, not sorry.

Hope you enjoy them anyway! Thanks for reading! 💜 Love you!

*************************************** Scenario Being long aware of your crush on them, the boys eventually discover they have feelings for you as well but are still with another woman …

angst, fluff, smut

Word count 5.948

Key (in case it isn’t obvious) y/gf’s/n = your girlfriend’s name m/gf’s/n = my girlfriend’s name

***************************************

1. Kim Seokjin

I don’t see Seokjin cheating, not even for love. As soon as he’d discover that he is more than just infatuated with you he’d surely have a guilty conscience towards his current girlfriend, even though the feelings aren’t there anymore, and would act accordingly. Meaning: He would be mature about it, keep his distance, maybe even reject you at first, and not make a move on you until he definitely ended things with the other woman, taking his time to let her down as gently as possible.

„Y/n?“, Seokjin’s lowered voice lets you jolt from your thoughts, previously focused on your homework for one of your college classes. Not anymore, though, as you spin around in your seat to discover his slim figure at the door to your dorm room, an insecure, lopsided grin curving Jin’s soft lips. Your eyes widen at the sight of a beautiful floral bouquet clutched in his hands. „Have you gone mad, Kim Seokjin, to come here of all places? This dorm is filled with young women literally obsessing over you guys!“ Alarmed, you leap to your feet and pull him inside, quickly shutting the door after taking a look down the corridor lined with giggling spectators in pastel-colored pajama pants. „Great, this is gonna be all over social networks tomorrow, Jin. And what the hell did you bring those flowers for!? There will surely be rumors, and your girlfriend —“ Your voice abandons you at her mention. Cheeks burning, you lower your burning eyes, avoiding Jin’s. „Well, y/gf’s/n will not be happy. She already hates me as it is.“ „Don’t worry about her, y/n“, he replies, his tone unexpectedly calm. Slowly, he comes up to you, leaving the bouquet at your desk and extending a now free hand to reach for your chin, gently lifting it so you are forced to look at him. Embarrassed by the tears filling your eyes, you try to avert your face, but Seokjin doesn't let you, going on to cup your cheeks with both his slender hands. „Y/n, look at me, please.“ Reluctantly, you do as he says, confused to find him smiling after how your previous encounter had ended. With you confessing your long-harbored feelings and him firmly rejecting you, leaving you in shambles. „It’s over between me and m/gf’s/n. Do you hear me, y/n? It was over long ago. Actually, we were never even meant to be, as it turns out, since our love didn’t simply fade, it was never truly there. Because if this, if what I feel for you is love, then I was never in love before. I’m sorry I had to turn you down when you poured out your heart to me, y/n. I wanted nothing more than to dry your tears and kiss you right then and there. But it would’ve been wrong. I’m not that kind of man and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to make me a cheater, would you?“ Quietly, you shake your head. „See. So this was really the only way. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize who I was supposed to be with. I will never let you go again, y/n. From now on my heart belongs only to you.“ Smiling, Seokjin slowly lowers his lips to yours as his hands make their way down your neck to pull you closer.

2. Min Yoongi / Suga

Similar to Seokjin, I don’t believe Yoongi to be the cheating kind. He is not one to let people in or trust them easily so he would respect the kind of trust his girlfriend put in him and not step out on her. Still, as soon as he would realize that he didn’t have any feelings for her anymore but even stronger ones for you, he wouldn’t want to waste any time and immediately break it off with her, not mincing matters but be very direct and probably even end things through a text message, so he can devote himself fully to you as soon as possible.

„I especially like that one part, right there“, you explain, leaning over Yoongi’s shoulder and closer to the screen of his computer to point out a specific sequence of the sound track he’s currently working on. „It has so much depth to it, I believe it would sound incredible with your headphones.“ As he now slightly turns his head to look at your face in profile, so close to his you can feel his warm breath brush past your cheek, you try hard not to let on what being this near to him does to your body, the physical response being immediate. You can’t keep your cheeks from blushing, though, as the heat emanating from Yoongi’s hunched figure and the faint scent of eau de cologne drifting from his neckline send your heart racing and lead a lump to form in your throat. „What?“, you ask, darting him a quick side glance, frozen in place, unable to bring yourself to move, even though you are well aware of the fact that it’s about damn time to retreat. Otherwise … „You really shouldn’t have leaned in so close, y/n“, Yoongi growls in a low, suddenly husky voice, the sound of it sending shivers down your spine. „Sorry“, you barely manage to whisper, your breath caught. Before you can pull back, though, Yoongi’s lips somehow find yours, meeting them in an initially hesitant, gentle kiss, showing insecurity, which quickly becomes more confident, though, as soon as he feels you respond to it keenly, longingly.   Until you suddenly break away, breathless. „No, Yoongi, we shouldn’t do this. What about —“ „M/gf’s/n!?“, he raises a brow at you. „What do you think of me, y/n?“ A smirk tugging at his lips, rosy and slightly swollen from the intensity of your recently shared kiss, he turns his chair around and gently pulls you onto his lap. You're incapable of resisting, even if you wanted to, willingly following his lead. „Of course I broke up with her. I’m no cheater.“ „What!?“, you exclaim in surprise. „When?“ „Just now, about an hour ago“, Yoongi shrugs like it is nothing. „When you were cold and put on my sweater. It was then I realized that I never want to see any other woman wear my clothes again. And that what I feel for you is far more than some damn crush. So, don’t worry, you didn’t just make me a sinner.“ „You’re incorrigible, Min Yoongi“, you shake your head, unable to keep yourself from grinning like a giddy schoolgirl. „I know. And now let’s continue where we left off, shall we?“ Roughly, he pulls you in even closer, your core now pressing against his hardening bulge. „I’ve been waiting for this forever, y/n.“ „I can tell“, you smile as Yoongi’s eager lips trail down your neck towards your collarbone, covering your skin in urging kisses leaving rosy pink marks while his hand naturally slides in between your thighs, the pressure against your pulsating heat eliciting an involuntary moan from you. „So, I guess you’ve been anticipating this just as much, huh?“, he grins at your lips. „Oh, shut up“, you groan. „Well, I’m not gonna keep my baby girl waiting any longer then.“

3. Jung Hoseok / J-Hope

I don’t believe Hoseok to be the kind of person to ever knowingly or consciously hurt another individual. However, overcome by his feelings for you and with things surely getting heated and physical real quick, I imagine the existence of his current girlfriend could surely slip his mind for a second there. Afterwards, though, he would assume responsibility for his actions and terminate his relationship with her as soon as possible, trying not to offend her or her feelings in the process.

„Okay, it’s getting really late, Hope, I think we’re done here for today“, you pant, still out of breath after just having finished yet another run-through of the choreography you and Hoseok had been practicing all night long. All too aware of his eyes following your every move, you brush back your hair, damp with sweat, and empty half a bottle of water before you turn to face Hoseok who is stretching in a rear corner of the practice room, his gaze still fixed on you. You can’t help but notice a shift in his expression. That he looks at you a little differently than he usually would. And the way he bites his lip, reminding you of just how badly you want to kiss it … „What?“, you questioningly arch a brow at him, grateful that your face is still flushed as a result of your intense training so Hoseok can’t see your cheeks blush under his piercing glance. „Nothing“, he smirks, shedding his oversized sweater in one smooth movement while he is slowly headed towards you, emphasizing each of his steps as if he were still dancing even though the music has long died out and the studio’s silence is now only filled by both your heavy breathing. „You simply look insanely beautiful right now, y/n“, Hoseok then adds, meanwhile standing right before you, so close you can smell his sweat mixed with the scent of his cologne, an odor proving to be incredibly enticing. Restraining yourself from pressing your lips to his, which are by now excruciatingly nearby, demands the whole of your willpower and self-control. „What!?“, you scoff, feigning indifference. „I’m a sweaty mess, Hoseok.“                                                                                            „Exactly“, he whispers, his breathy voice surprisingly hoarse, next thing you know unexpectedly leaning in even closer until his lips hover only millimeters above yours. Paralyzed, you remain unmoving, your entire body tingling in anticipation of his next move, the burning tension building up in your lower abdomen becoming almost unbearable. An involuntary moan escapes you the moment Hoseok’s soft lips finally find yours in a quickly deepening kiss, his tongue urging to be granted entry which you gladly allow it. „You like this, hmm, y/n?“, he teases you, the both of you breaking away from each other only to catch your breath. Silently, eyes closed, eager to feel his lips on yours again, you simply nod, Hoseok’s hands rendering your body his helpless puppet, quivering under his every touch as his fingers now skillfully find their way beneath your shirt to pull it over your head, leaving your chest almost bare, only covered by a skimpy sports bra. „Good“, he breathes against your neck, pressing your back to the mirror now, the sensation of its cold, smooth surface on your skin only intensifying your lust. Encouraged by your moans, Hoseok now goes on to lift you up onto his slim hips while covering your torso in hot, wet kisses, occasionally nibbling and sucking at your sensitive skin to mark you as his. All by themselves, your hands travel down his chest, coming to a halt by the rim of his trunks, impatiently starting to tug at it. Hoseok understands instantly. Following your lead, he pulls down his sweatpants and yours, his lips now colliding with yours again in a messy, urging kiss which is broken when he eventually enters you. Your back arching, your fingernails dig into his sweaty shoulders, eliciting a soft growl from Hoseok. Soon, your combined ecstatic moans echo from the mirror-lined walls of the practice room, accompanied by the sound of skin clashing with skin, the rhythm and depth of Hoseok’s thrusts gradually increasing until you both climax almost at the same time, his hand quickly shooting up to cover your mouth and silence the stifled scream escaping the deep of your throat as you throw your head back in pleasure. „Shit, Hoseok“, you pant, struggling for breath. A broad grin stretching across his tired features, revealing his dimples, he slowly lowers you back onto your own two feet. After you both got dressed, his gaze lingers on you for another few seconds before he pulls you in for another kiss on the lips, going on to put his forehead to yours. And so you remain, still panting, leaning against the mirror and each other, for minutes that feel like an eternity. „Was this … a mistake?“, you finally bring yourself to ask, your voice shaking as you can feel tears filling your eyes. „No“, Hoseok shakes his head. „No. It’s a mistake we didn’t do this earlier, y/n. Because I love you. I’m not only saying this because we just had incredible sex. I mean it. I’ve suspected it for a while, but now I’m finally sure. My feelings for you are real. More real than anything I’ve ever felt. I guess I should talk to m/gf’s/n.“ „Are you sure?“, you gasp, staring up at him with fearful incredulity.               „Yes, y/n, I’m sure“, he smiles down at you. „I will end things with her. For good. Even though she, too, must know already that we’re long history. I’ll speak to m/gf’s/n first thing tomorrow morning. Promise. You’re the only one I want to be with from now on.“

4. Kim Namjoon

Namjoon would make no secret of his feelings for you. Still, he would not resort to cheating but rather exercise self-control, consider the other woman’s feelings and respect her too much to act on his desire and emotions before having ended things with her as amicably as possible. Also, he wouldn’t be one to do things by halves and would only want to get involved with you once he’s certain he can give you his full devotion, making sure you can trust him since trust and honesty are essential to Namjoon.

„Seriously, Joon, how do you do it?“, you shake your head in disbelief. „This was brand new. I literally bought it just yesterday. You get your hands on it once and it’s ruined.“ You can’t help but laugh at his frustrated frown while Namjoon does not appear to find the situation amusing at all. „I’m sorry, y/n, I’m gonna replace that phone case at once.“ His expression suddenly serious, full lower lip disappearing entirely, he extends his hand to reach for your phone which you set down in the middle of the table in between you in order to examine the damage done. „No, Joon, don’t sweat it! Seriously! You don’t need to —“ Your voice dries up the very instant his hand touches yours. You both had tried to grab your phone before the other could, simultaneously jumping to your feet, Namjoon accidentally tripping over his chair in the process, and leaning forward, leading you to bump foreheads. „I’m sorry“, you utter, hardly managing a hoarse whisper as a choking lump quickly builds in your throat caused by Namjoon’s sudden proximity.   „My mistake“, he breathes against your cheek, slightly tilting his head to look you in the eye, your hands still resting on each other, the both of you hovering over the table motionlessly, as if time had stopped, lips only centimeters apart now, so close you can feel the heat emanating from his skin. The urge to kiss him right here and now, in the middle of this crowded café, becomes almost overpowering. It takes all of your willpower not to give in to it. „I think I should go, y/n“, Namjoon finally breaks the silence, the sizzling tension having built up between you instantly going up in smoke the second he pulls back, his suddenly harsh tone leaving a bitter taste in your dry mouth as you watch him swiftly stride through the coffee shop and leave without even sparing you another glance. Inwardly cursing yourself, you sink back into your chair, eyes burning with tears you don’t allow yourself to shed, blankly staring at the crumpled up fifty thousand won bill Namjoon left on the table, next to your broken phone case. „Can I get you anything else?“, the waitress cautiously asks in passing, giving you a pitiful smile. „No, thanks. I’d like the check, please.“ „Sure thing.“ When she returns, you pay her using your own money, the mere thought of even laying a hand on Namjoon’s bill leading your stomach to turn. „Miss, I think you forgot something!“, the waitress calls after you, already on your way out. When you turn around, she’s holding up the banknote he left behind. „No, you keep it“, you stop her, heading towards you, with a wave of your hand. „Really?“ Her eyes widen with incredulity. „Yes. Have a nice day.“ You force a smile before you turn to go, eager to leave that stuffy café behind, your seizing lungs aching for fresh air and your legs urging you to run, run away, away from those foolish feelings of yours which you cannot seem to abandon. Later that day, when you return home with the prompt approach of dusk, you find Namjoon seated on your doorstep, head resting in his hands, face hidden from your view. Demonstratively, you clear your throat as you pull to a halt before him. His gaze instantly shoots up to meet yours. „Y/n, I’m so sorry“, he mutters in getting up, going on to take a step towards you. „I’m sorry I left like that. I just realized that there was an urgent matter that needed to be taken care of.“ „Sure“, you scoff, evading his hand reaching for your shoulder, blindly feeling for your key in the depths of your jacket pocket, already rushing past him, headed for the door. „I mean it, y/n. That was no excuse. I finally admitted to myself that this between us can no longer be ignored.“ His words cause you to pause in your step and turn back around to face him, your eyes searching his and finding nothing but affection and sincerity. „What I feel for you is real, y/n. I never had such feelings for m/gf’s/n. Like … I can’t even put into words what my heart tells me whenever I lay eyes on you, whenever I listen to the sound of your voice or hear you laugh. What your touch does to me. We’re not just friends anymore, at least not as far as I’m concerned. And I’m pretty sure you feel the same way about me. Right?“ You can’t help but notice insecurity flash up behind those warm, dark eyes of his. „Of course, I do, Namjoon. I thought you knew?“ „I did. And I’m sorry I didn’t realize earlier what my soul kept screaming at me“, Namjoon whispers as he pulls you in for a long, deep kiss, his hands tangled up in your hair, leaving you breathless. You don’t even hear your keys fall to the ground, the world around you quickly fading away under Namjoon’s touch.

5. Park Jimin

I believe Jimin would be torn. On one hand, being the sweet soul he is, he wouldn’t want to offend his current girlfriend’s feelings, even though he doesn’t love her anymore, but on the other hand, the last thing he’d want to do would be to hurt you, afraid to lose his chance at a future with you. When the going would get rough, however, his passion would most likely momentarily get the better of him, probably leading him to act on impulse and do something he would regret later on. Still, he would accept responsibility and deal with the consequences, acting with as much consideration for everyone involved as possible.

It’s around midnight. The rest of the members decided to turn in early today, exhausted from a long day of back-to-back promotional events and interviews regarding their quickly approaching comeback. So it’s only you and Jimin now, huddled up to each other on the sofa, watching an especially bloody American horror movie from the early 2000’s. When the masked killer unexpectedly makes another appearance onscreen, holding up a glistening knife, you can’t help but flinch, a stifled squeal slipping from your lips as you bury your face in Jimin’s chest, hands tightly clenched around the soft fabric of his sweater. „Did that scare you?“, you hear him laugh, one of his arms around your shoulder now, his other hand comfortingly patting your back. „It’s all right, y/n, it’s over. The blood is gone.“ Embarrassed by your childish outburst, however, you stay in place, unmoving, snuggling up even closer to Jimin in an effort to hide your reddening cheeks. „Come on, y/n. I swear, the masked guy is gone“, he softly chuckles, his hand reaching down and under your chin to force it up and you to look at him. Grudgingly, you finally succumb to his untiring attempts at luring you out of concealment, your sudden surrender, however, seeming to come so unexpectedly to him that Jimin stares down at you wide-eyed, flustered, as your face now appears right before his. You’re so close the tips of your noses even touch. You can feel Jimin’s hot breath stroke your tingling lips and can’t help but notice an inscrutable shift in his expression, his eyes darkening with what appears to be … lust? Your suspicion is soon confirmed by Jimin’s unmistakable erection pressing against your thigh. A mischievous grin curves his plump lips as he now sits up, moving in closer, his arms still tightly wrapped around your waist. Your breath catches when he looks you straight in the eye while slowly, gently, lowering his mouth onto yours, and you can no longer deny the wetness building up between your legs, your core pulsating, longing for Jimin’s length inside you. A sensation not unfamiliar to you. There has always been undeniable sexual tension between the two of you, so obvious Taehyung even approached you about it only weeks ago. But you’ve never come this close to actually giving in to it. Jimin now abandoning all his self-control can, to you, only mean one thing: He has finally made up his mind. After years of you having harbored a torturous one-sided love for him, he has finally decided to leave behind his already long dead relationship and free himself for you. A realization filling you with excitement and leading you to cave in to his urging lips, opening them to let his tongue slip inside, the kiss quickly deepening and growing more heated by the second. Searching, Jimin’s hands travel across your body, following its soft curves, leaving every one of your particles vibrating to the rhythm of his clearly palpable, increasingly quickening heartbeat. An involuntary moan slips out your mouth when Jimin pulls your hips onto his, grinding his bulge against your core, his lips never leaving yours. „You moan so well for me, y/n. So perfect“, he whispers, smiling, breathless, without breaking the kiss. You don’t resist when he slips his hands down your pants while yours claw at his sweater, your arousal so intense it’s almost painful by now and all you long for being Jimin inside of you. „So wet for me“, he mumbles against your neck, gently nipping at the delicate skin, his teeth sure to leave a mark, while his fingers slowly move in and out of you. It takes you all of your remaining self-control not to moan too loudly and alert any of the boys of what’s currently happening in their very living room. „That’s right, baby girl“, Jimin whispers, his voice hoarse, when you clench around his skillful fingers. „I want you. Now“, a brittle plea escapes your sore lips. Eagerly, Jimin complies, a quiver going through your body as his hard member enters you and your hips start automatically swaying on top of him, his movements quickly falling in sync with yours. Your pleasure, however, is abruptly disturbed by a sudden noise. The vibration of a muted phone ringing on the coffee table next to you. Instinctively, your gaze shifts from Jimin’s dark, lustful eyes to the device. The display shows a photograph of his — as you naturally assumed — former girlfriend. Who is calling him. In the middle of the night. Immediately, you stop what you were doing, your arousal quickly fading, leaving a cold sensation in the pit of your stomach. Lips pressed shut to keep them from trembling, you climb off a flustered Jimin. „What? What is it, y/n? Did I do something wrong? Did I hurt you?“ „You might say so“, you scoff, averting your face to hide your eyes, glistening with tears of disappointment and remorse. „What? What did I do?“ Wordlessly, you point to his phone, half a dozen text messages lighting up its screen. Honey, where are you? Jimin-ah, you said you’d come by, baby. I miss you. When are you coming? Don’t tell me you’re with that whore right now!, they read. „You didn’t break up with y/gf’s/n yet? What the hell, Jimin!?“, you barely manage to get out the words as you hastily get dressed. „I’m sorry, y/n, I just couldn’t. The way she looked at me all teary-eyed — I couldn’t bring myself to break her heart.“ „So you’d rather break mine, you thought?“ „No! I would never — Wait, y/n!“, he calls out, reaching for your wrist as you already turn to go. „You just made me a cheating whore, Jimin. And you know very well of my feelings for you. If that’s not breaking my heart, then I don’t know what would be.“ As you turn around to look at him now, his grip on your arm tightening, you notice tears shimmering in his eyes, too. „I’m truly sorry, y/n. I really am. I should have ended things with her long ago. I know that.“ „That doesn’t make things right, Jimin“, you whisper, your voice cracking and barely audible, unable to meet his eye. „I know, y/n, I know. And it pains me to see you hurt by my actions. I will do everything in my power to make it up to you, I promise. This wasn’t just some onetime thing, I swear. I care for you. A lot. And I want to be with you. Just, please, let me set things right with m/gf’s/n first, okay?“

6. Kim Taehyung / V

Taehyung is a family man with traditional values when it comes to love and relationships, who repeatedly stated that he would like to spend his life with his first love. So he would at first try and make it work with his current girlfriend, and never ever cheat on her, despite the increasing lack of affection in the partnership. When he, however, realizes that she is indeed not his first love, but that you are, he would make a clean cut, let her down easy and apply himself to you and you only who is now his first priority. He would want to give you his full attention and the devotion, understanding and care you deserve.

„What? No! Again!? This isn’t fair! I’m never playing with you again!“, you whine, going on to roll around on the floor theatrically since Taehyung has, once more, beaten you at your favorite video game, your childish demeanor eliciting a deep, throaty laugh from him. „What? Are you gonna throw a fit now?“, he asks, his voice still shaken by hearty laughter, as he puts down his controller and climbs on top of you in order to pin your limbs, flailing about uncontrollably, to the ground. „Get off me!“, you demand, pouting, wiggling around under the weight of Taehyung’s body in the vain effort to shake him off. He only tightens his grip on your arms and leans down on you even further, his face now hovering mere centimeters above yours. A mystifying look in his eyes, he simply stares at you, biting his lower lip that’s caught in a smug smile. The abrupt shift in Taehyung’s expression leads you to freeze in his tight clasp. Wide-eyed you look up at him who is so close now that his beautiful features are almost out of focus. „What?“, you hardly manage a whisper, the intense gaze of his inky eyes leading your throat to tighten. „What is it, Tae?“ „You’re beautiful, that’s all“, he grins, licking his reddening lower lip which you can barely restrain yourself from kissing at this point. „Yah, stop it, Tae“, you scoff, averting your flushed face, unable to stand eye contact any further second, his stare burning holes into your vulnerable soul. „And now get off me. We shouldn’t be doing this.“ „Why not?“, he inquires, unmoving. „You know very well why not, Taehyung. Y/gf’s/n could come by any second and will probably think this is exactly what it looks like“, you grudgingly point out the elephant in the room, your intestines cramping up into a cold lump at the mere mention of her. „What does this look like then, y/n?“ „Are you serious right now!?“, you glare at him, your hurt at the de novo realization that Taehyung is not and never will be yours now quickly making room for burning rage at his audacity to actually tease you about it. „Why?“, he asks, his rosy lips pursed, looking like a sulky puppy all of a sudden and making it impossible for you to stay mad at him any longer. „You know exactly what I was talking about, Tae“, you sigh, closing your eyes to avoid his, unable to escape him, your body still stuck under his hips. „We can’t be doing this. This is more than what’s appropriate between male and female friends. We’re too close. Too physical. If y/gf’s/n would find us like this, she’d surely think there was something going on between us, or at least the physical attraction to inspire this … kind of intimacy.“ „Well, isn’t there?“ This is by far not the reaction you anticipated. Surprised, your eyelids fly open again. „What?“ „Isn’t there something going on between us?“, Taehyung repeats his question, more precisely phrased this time, both his tone and expression puzzlingly deadpan. You can’t help but merely stare at him, perplexed. Smiling enigmatically, Taehyung lowers his torso onto yours, taking his own sweet time, finally letting go of your wrists, his weight now only supported by his arms resting on his elbows as he presses his lips to yours. They instinctively respond to his touch and movements, the kiss happening naturally, gently. „Now, if this isn’t something, then I don’t know what is“, he whispers at your cheek, his hot breath brushing past your neck sending a shiver down your spine. „But, Tae —“, you want to object. His soft lips, however, now wandering down your neckline towards your collarbone take your breath away, giving you no chance to contradict. „Don’t worry, y/n“, Taehyung reassures you, his eyes locked with yours once again, a soft smile tugging at his slightly swollen lips. „I’m not with her anymore. I ended it with m/gf’s/n weeks ago. I just couldn’t find the right moment to tell you yet. I didn’t want to rush anything or make you feel pressured. And, most of all, I didn’t want you to assume you’re my rebound. I wanted things to take their course at their own, natural pace. And I’m glad they did. Because I love you, y/n. I always did. It’s just that, when we met, I was with the wrong person. We were a little late. But now, finally, eventually, destiny brought us together and everything falls into place.“

7. Jeon Jungkook

Jungkook would most likely be confused by his conflicting feelings due to his young age and inexperience. He would be insecure as to how to distinguish ‚real love‘ from infatuation or mere attraction and would take his own sweet time to realize what he actually wants and act on it, afraid to be eventually rejected by you.

Startled by the sudden sound of your doorbell ringing through your quiet flat long past midnight, you leap off the sofa and to your feet with a stifled squeal, heart immediately pounding. Reluctantly, you put away your book and go to answer it, breathing a sigh of relief as you catch sight of Jungkook through the peephole. „Shit, Kookie, you almost gave me a freaking heart attack!“, you greet him who naturally steps inside without waiting to be invited. The look in his eye stern and his features set in a tense expression caught in a mixture of anxiety and anger, he rushes past you without sparing you so much as a glance. „What the hell, Jungkook?“, you call him out on his strange behavior, but he remains silent, pacing the floor of your tiny living room, hands clenched into fists so tightly his knuckles turn white, and teeth gritted. Brows furrowed, you lock your front door again and follow him, watching him in puzzlement. „What’s wrong, Kookie? And what are you even doing here in the middle of the night? Isn’t it long past your curfew? Won’t you get in trouble if Big Hit finds out you’re here? And what about y/gf’s/n!? She’s gonna kill me!“ „Not helping, y/n“, Jungkook simply growls without looking up, his eyes still fixed on the floor before his feet. „Then talk to me! What is it? What’s up with you?“ By now, you’re seriously worried, rarely ever having seen usually oh-so-composed Jungkook in such a nervous state. „Jungkook, you’re driving me crazy! Would you stop, please!? Your running holes in my brand new carpet!“ Finally, he stops cold in his step right in front of you, so unexpectedly his sudden closeness makes you jump. „Me? Driving you crazy, y/n!? Really? Look what you’ve done to me. This is all your fault!“, he forces the words out through still clenched teeth, glaring at you, his eyes burning with something other than rage. Something deeper, darker, even more animally. Lust. Passion. Instinctively, you draw back, but Jungkook simply follows you, moving in even closer, until your back eventually hits the wall and his body is pressed up against yours, both his hands put down to each side of your shoulders, restraining you from any movement. „Kookie, what —?“ You don’t get very far, your vocal cords failing you when Jungkook now slightly tilts his head, a mischievous grin spreading across his soft features, chin protruding, and leans in so close your lips almost touch. „You know exactly why I’m here, y/n. And what I’m about to do“, he whispers, his hot breath tickling your sensitive skin and sending shivers across the whole of your body. „Kookie, it’s been weeks since we last talked“, you croak out, faced with Jungkooks dangerous proximity involuntarily having held your breath for the last few seconds. „You didn’t even text me back. And now you suddenly appear at my door in the middle of the night? What about y/gf’s/n?“ „Don’t mind her, y/n“, Jungkook breaths against your lips, placing one quick kiss on them — first gentle, uncertain, but soon turning rougher and more arrogating, eliciting a quiet moan from you — before he continues to speak, his voice hoarse. „Because I finally realized that she was never right for me. That I want you. I need you. On so many levels. I do ever since I first saw you. But on one particular level, I want you right here and right now.“ „I can live with that“, you smile, all tension at once leaving your body that is finally ready to give in to his. „Then be a good girl and turn around, y/n“, Jungkook demands, whirling you around by your waist, his hands already pulling down your jeans.

I hope you enjoyed them 😁 and are having a nice day/night, wherever you are! 

Thanks for reading! Take care! 💜

Here you can find my Masterlist if you feel like checking out more of my BTS fiction!

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[mrsunrepentantwarriorpriest]

How did priest propose to you? Was it romantic? Tell me everything.

It’s actually kind of bittersweet, but very romantic if one ignores all the ridiculousness. It’s unfortunate, but it was seriously like a bad romance novel where I would have bitched about the characters being stupid for no reason.

UWP actually proposed to me multiple times, but it took me a while to realize that he was and even more attempts before I said yes. 

Why, you may ask? Because I was completely retarded about the entire thing. In my defense though, UWP didn’t help. 

Once upon a time when we meet, we were both pretty beat up from previous relationships. For me, dating chicks still felt like cheating on my ex-gf and I was still super hung up on her, like drop everything to be there for her any time she called, hung up. I was dating 7 guys to try and move on in a way that didn’t feel like cheating. UWP had sworn to never date again.

But, when he asked me to go out and start dating, it was mutually agreed that we weren’t looking for anything monogamous, let alone serious. Conversation actually went along the lines of:

UWP: I don’t do dating. If you don’t hear from me for a few hours, you can assume I’m out getting my dick wet.

Me: Works for me. I have plans this weekend so you won’t hear much from me anyway. Oh, and next month I’m going with X on a trip for two weeks, so likely won’t be able to chat too much then either.

Because that conversation set the tone for the first few months we were dating, we both fought falling in love. UWP felt jealous and like he didn’t have a chance compared to the other guys I was dating. I figured that there were at least 5 other chicks UWP was involved with. Because when we first met, he’d stayed with me a few days before heading back home, he flirted with every female cashier we ran into and made certain comments about half the women in my family, my thoughts were along the lines of: “Wow. I can’t even hold your attention or interest being the new shiny.”

We both felt like the end was inevitable, but we both wanted to hold on as long it was possible.

Now, we both had plenty of chances to fix this. All we had to do was listen a little better and show a little fortitude. UWP got an unguarded confession of how I felt, but because when I sobered up he was literally standing with one foot out the door, I panicked and tried to play it off as I didn’t know what I was saying. UWP made a blog dedicated to sharing things with me because it was easier than spamming me with pictures. I didn’t realize it was for me and figured it was for someone else, and thought he just asked my thoughts as an editor to make sure it was on point for who it was really for.

Times that shit by like 4 months.

Enter Thanksgiving. I go up to visit him for the holiday (not knowing I’m the first to be allowed to the house). We have a wonderful time just enjoying being around each other. So wonderful, that one day I woke up feeling completely content in his arms, and it broke my heart.

I thought I’d just fallen completely for someone who probably only used me to fill the time between the others he was more serious about. I didn’t complain though, it’s what we had agreed to originally. It was my bad falling for the one guy who didn’t want anything serious.

Now, UWP has failed to tell me that since asking me out, despite all of his very vocal protests about dating, monogamy, and what I should expect when I don’t hear from him, he hadn’t been with anyone else. I forget the exact timeline, but it was around this time that he also stopped talking, one way or another, to his other interests. He failed to mention that when he heard how I felt he was thrilled and only hesitant that I didn’t mean it.

Like I said, full on romance novel levels of angst and drama because we were stupid. 

UWP wakes up and notices I’m absolutely morose and what passes as crying for me. Takes a while, but he finally gets me to tell him why I’m so upset. After a bit of talking, he got out a knife, scratched his mark into me, and had me scratch my mark into him. He told me how he’d never let anyone mark him, but that after I’d have a piece of his soul, just as he’d have a piece of mine by making the marks.

Now if you’re weird like us, this is actually incredibly romantic, but I get for a lot of people it probably sounds weird. For those people this likely doesn’t sound like a proposal, but you can’t take off a scar. Accepting a scar has to be taken a lot more seriously because of it. 

Anyway…

Somewhere in UWP telling me he was mine, and making me say it too, my retarded, jaded ass didn’t think that he was really offering up everything I wanted from him. So, because of my stupid ass, the torment continued for another couple months. Right up until UWP lost all patience with me.

He came down with family a bit later, and only was going to be in town a few hours, but he was fed up with my shit.

I still remember how he barreled into my house, grabbed me by the arm, dragged me to my room, and laid it out. No more bullshit, no more not knowing, no more going back. All I had to do was say yes, and that would be it, we would be engaged, no questions except how to plan the wedding. He gave me one of his rings on a chain until he could buy an engagement ring.

After that he proposed every chance he got. There were days he proposed 3 times a day, some times every day. With ring pops, taking the ring from the chain, thrift shop rings, anything suitable he could get his hands on.