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nomazee · 1 year

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sebastian (sdv) x reader

word count: 3.5k

content: silly love again, mutual pining, not actually unrequited love, some goofs and giggles and misunderstandings, the teeniest tiniest inkling of angst but it’s covered up with silliness, the word hussy is used which is the funniest word ever and i’m so glad i discovered it it’s so old-timey-small-town word

notes: this is a part three to my little mini series w sebastian! you can find part one here, and part two here!

oh hey guys this is probably completely indecipherable but i’ve been rewriting this over and over again this past week and decided that this is my most proudest version of this work and maybe there will be more but this... is IT (i’m lying and will be writing more companion pieces to this okay much love love all of u mwah)

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Hiding from your problems does not fix everything. In fact, it doesn’t fix anything.

It’s a lesson you should’ve figured out the first time you did it. You remember being back in grade school, forgetting to study for a test one year and faking a rash in the nurse’s office to get out of it. The rash in question was a collection of the healing, scabbed-over cat scratches on your forearm. You’d drawn over it harshly with dark red pen and marker to create some kind of rash-like illusion. In the end all you got was a disappointed look from the nurse, an ugly smear of red and burgundy on your arm, and a D-minus on your world history test.

So, yes. Hiding has dreadful consequences. And even just during your time in Stardew Valley, you should’ve known to keep this lesson close to your heart. This is the second time you’ve run away from Sebastian already, and the first time didn't last long anyways. Stupid, silly you.

In your defense, it wasn’t really Sebastian you were running away from. It was his mom. For three days following your stupid kissing shenanigans, Robin terrorized your dreams, and your daydreams, and the reflections of yourself that you saw in the tiny pond on your farm…

So, yes it’s safe to say that running away was not doing you any good. But what other choice did you have?

You’re an adult. You could totally scrape apart what’s left of your dignity and act like it—maybe take the walk up to the mountains and apologize to Robin and Sebastian, too. Tell them that it was wrong of you to be so promiscuous on their front porch (promiscuous, of course, equating to one single kiss on the lips that lasted no more than ten seconds), and that you’d never do it again and never even look Sebastian in the eyes, if that’s what they wanted.

While you’re at it, maybe you’d be able to ask Robin for the coop upgrade that you’ve needed for weeks now. All you have to do is… be an adult and face your problems. Your one massive roadblock of a problem.

It’s not even a problem, per se. But you’ve embarrassed yourself far too much in front of the people in this town and you’re a little tired of taking blow after devastating blow to your reputation. You’d rather wilt and rot here, on the soil of your farm, with your duck walking her webbed feet across your chest and leaving damp marks all over your shirt.

This is peace. This is where you could die, decomposing in your leftover humiliation from the week before. But of course—all good things come to an end, and the end comes to you in the form of a distinct lack of wheat seeds in your storage containers.

Dreadful. This is a sign from some higher power that it’s finally time for you to get your ass up and go into town. Face the world like an adult. Get your wheat seeds so that you and your animals don’t starve to death and rot away on this already-rotting farm. Ugh.

Your duck pads up your chest and leans her face into yours. Her beady little eyes stare right into your soul. She’s begging you. Begging you to get wheat so her plump little body doesn’t start to deteriorate. What a manipulator.

A heavy, bone-rattling sigh escapes you as you gently push her off of you and sit up. This is it. You have to face everyone, again, after embarrassing yourself in front of the stupid boy you like and his mother, of all people. Fortunately for you, they live up in the mountains, so a little trip to PIerre’s in town wouldn’t be so much of a risk. You’d be fine. You could still be a functioning adult, so long as you didn't wander up north where the mines were.

…

Okay, well. You lied to yourself.

It was all a big lie. A big lie you told yourself to feel some kind of security about leaving your stupid, lonely farm and going into town and getting the stupid seeds that you needed. You’re a liar, a fraud, and a chronic-problem-avoider, and none of those problems would ever get fixed during your probably-very-short-lifespan. Short, of course, because you were going to die in the middle of Pierre’s shop, right here and right now in the produce aisle.

Because of course, as luck would have it, Sebastian is right there too. Staring at you. Holding two unshucked ears of corn, in his hands. You would laugh at how silly he looked if this wasn’t so humiliating.

“Um.” He’s the first to say anything. Hearing his voice after a week startles you enough to make you stiffen even more and your shaky hands threaten to drop the seed packets to the floor. His eyes are wide and there’s a flush to his cheeks that might be from the leftover chill of the outdoors. Despite everything, you hope maybe it’s because of you instead.

You can’t form words. Your mouth flutters open and closed like a trapdoor until you decide to keep them tightly shut. Devastating. Humiliating. Mortifying. There are so many words that you’ve used so often over the last two weeks that you could continue to use here. Your vocabulary is not very expansive in the slightest, but it’s not your fault you’ve been put in the same types of scenarios so often.

“Hello,” you choke out. Surprisingly, your voice is steady for the most part. The rest of you is not. The seeds rattle in your hands and you can feel your legs locked up. Anxiety floods through you like ice water and freezes in your bone marrow. You’re stuck. You might throw up. Again, this is a very common theme in every interaction you have with Sebastian. Very unfortunate.

Even more unfortunate is the fact that, despite all the embarrassment and chagrin and overall-horrifying matter of events, you still want to kiss him. You’re reliving the ten-second kiss from the last time you saw him and it’s making you enter some parallel universe in your head—one where his mom didn't catch you kissing, and where he liked you back and maybe let you sleep over his house like he said he would, and where you could kiss him even more. You’re getting whiplash from everything running through your head. God.

“I, um…” he clearly feels just as awkward, which does nothing to reassure you. “Haven’t seen you in a while. We thought you’d… show up to the saloon, or.” Sebastian cuts himself off early. He must realize by your completely unmoving form that you’re not planning on loosening up at all during the course of this conversation.

“Right, um,” you scramble for some kind of excuse but you know that regardless of what you say, he’s gonna know. He’s not gonna believe a single thing you say, because he knows. He was there. He was the one that you kissed.

There’s no way he’s not completely aware at this time. Totally and utterly aware that you’re indescribably in love with him, more than infatuated. He must know that you like him so much it makes your chest hurt and your head ache with the untamable need to kiss him stupid every time you see his face. He must know. You’d risked it all, laid it open on the table for him last week when you kissed him and he didn't do much with it, really, which was fine but—he must know. After all of this.

A thought rushes through your head and it immediately heats up the ice in your bones. You’re moving, now, this time at a pace that can only be achieved by spontaneous ferocity and a phobia of the mother of the boy you like. You’re quick to act, lunging forward and grabbing his arm to pull his entire form behind the shelf.

“Is your mom here?!” you whisper harshly at him. You didn't even think of it until now, the fact that he might be here with his mother and that would mean you’d have to face her not on your own terms. A confrontation would start up in the middle of this quiet, quaint little grocery store, and you’d have to yield and nod at an angry ginger woman as she called you a hussy, or something. Or— no, Robin wouldn’t call you a hussy. She was too nice for that. Pam would call you a hussy, probably. Well.

The distress in your voice must come out clearly enough for him because he frantically shakes his head and whispers back a definite no! It’s too late to reel you back in, though, and your mind is already going a million miles a minute. If you’re going to do anything, you have to do it now, because otherwise you will never speak a single word to this family ever again.

“You— Please tell your mom that I’m sorry, like so very very sorry, and I will give her so many of my crops and hardwood and stone to make up for everything. And—” you shush him when he tries to interrupt, talking over him rapidly to stop him from trying it again, “—I didn't mean to— or, I did mean— um, point is. Tell your mom. I’m so sorry. And that I really need a coop upgrade and I’ll pay her double what it normally is to make up for everything.” You pause. “Please.”

Sebastian is. Speechless. It’s not often that you see him like this—in fact, you don’t think you’ve actually ever seen him like this. His mouth flutters open and closed. Trapdoor, just like you, earlier. The shared traits between both of you make you want to throw up and scream. It’s too endearing and you want to rip your heart out before another situation happens just like last time, this time with Pierre as your witness.

“What…” he begins, “are you talking about?” The furrow in his brow is one of genuine confusion, and so is the high-pitched lilt of his questioning voice. It only serves to make you more confused. And more agitated because this is really really embarrassing and the heat of it is starting to settle on your face and neck.

“What. Do you think. I’m talking about.”

He obviously does not get the hint. He stays quiet, expression frustratingly unmoving as he blinks once, twice, three times at you. Holy shit.

“I’m not going to say it,” you tell him. Any kind of confidence you had going into this conversation has dissipated and melted into a gooey kind of embarrassment. Suddenly, you’re back in the grade school nurse’s office, flinching at the disappointed look she gives you as she writes you a pass back to class—back to your impending doom and the D-minus that awaits you. This is that. This is worse than that by ten— no, a thousand times.

“Are you five years old? What are you talking about, just say—!”

“You are so embarrassing.” You hiss at him, but there’s really no weight in your lackluster insult. It’s more of a half hearted attempt to get him to stop talking about everything and anything, at least until you get out of this goddamn store and maybe even this goddamn town where everyone likes to gossip.

You nearly tear the stupid ears of corn out of his stupid hands in your rush to get out of this store. “Are you— Is this the only thing you’re buying?” At his nod, you grab three more packets of miscellaneous seeds and start your rushed walk to the counter to check out.

“What are you doing?!” His voice is a frantic whisper, matching your tone, but it’s less aggravated and more just genuinely confused. Sebastian seems dazed, threaded into the spinning loom of your contagious anxiety. You feel bad about it, really, but you’re threaded right next to him in an aggravating bright yellow string, and it’s hard to untangle yourself.

“Please shut up,” you mumble, and then you’re at the counter and ignoring Pierre’s worried look as you pull crinkled dollar bills from your pockets. The transaction is fast, thankfully, and the cost of Sebastian’s items doesn’t set you back too much. Before you know it, you’re gripping part of his hoodie sleeve and dragging him out the door behind you.

The chill of fall hits you when you step outside. A foggy breath escapes you as you gain the courage to turn back at him. “You. Need to take these to your mom,” you thrust the stupid corn back into his arms and he catches them, thankfully, “and tell her I’m sorry. And pretend everything never happened. Tell her I’m. Really super very sorry.”

“I don’t think you— I’m. Not sure I understand,” he counters you, hesitant but determined in the way he keeps going, “she’s not mad at you. Why are you apologizing? I haven’t seen you for a week and now…?”

Aw. Maybe you should find it sweet that he seems at least a little bit upset about not seeing you, almost like he missed you. That delusional thought is muffled by the stress of everything you’re talking about, though.

“Hussy.”

“What?”

“Um.” There is no coming back from this. “Does she— Do people say that here? Does she. Think I’m a hussy.”

This is a ridiculous conversation. Every single interaction you’ve had with Sebastian, ever, has been ridiculous, and this is doing nothing to disprove that. You’ve actually going to puke. You know, it’s been just a joking threat these past few weeks, but this time you’re really going to vomit all over his stupid skater sneakers.

He’s dead silent, startled into submission by your words and you can’t even blame him. Who says the word hussy?! Why did you think anyone would call you a hussy?!?!

“I kissed her son in the dead of night right in front of her house,” you speak slowly and clearly, forcing yourself past the utter mortification that freezes your fingers and makes bile stir in your stomach, “and you’re saying that she doesn’t, um. That she’s… not mad.”

There is no coming back from this. Again. You’re grasping for either reassurance Sebastian’s mouth does that trapdoor thing again. You contemplate dropping all your seeds and running. Maybe the birds will like them.

“No. You just left me on my porch.” And he’s upset. At least a little bit. It shows in the incredulous tone of his voice and the way his lips stay parted in disbelief. You did, unfortunately, leave him on that porch that night. He’s not… wrong about that. “And then avoided me for a week. You didn't even come into town at all. Abigail and Sam told me they never saw you. Did you never leave your farm just so you wouldn’t see me?” Hurt. He’s hurt, not just upset.

Now you just feel stupid. You didn't even consider the implications of kissing someone and then running away and never seeing them again. In your defense, it wasn’t because of him, more because of his mom and the very likely (read: completely inaccurate) prediction that Robin would beat you up on sight.

“No!” You’re frantic to clear things up, but judging by his doubtful expression you’re going to have to do a lot to reach that goal. “That’s. It wasn’t on purpose. It was embarrassing.” It’s probably still the wrong choice of words. His face flinches and he glances to the side in discomfort. You’re losing him. You’re so, so bad at this. No kidding. That’s why you kissed a guy in front of his mom and almost threw up on his shoes, like, twice. Three times.

Maybe if you put it into perspective. “How would you feel if you kissed someone in their front lawn and then their mom came out and caught you guys kissing and on top of that, what if you were the new person in town and everyone still kind of maybe doesn’t like you completely, and you just ruined your reputation by kissing somebody in front of their parent?” Okay. Effective.

It’s quiet. He’s blinking at you. You get that response a lot whenever you speak to him, really. Maybe that’s a testament to your eloquence. (It’s really not.)

“And,” you keep going, because of course you do, “you never visited me, never sent a letter, nothing. Nobody came to see me. And. I kissed you and then you said nothing and. What was I supposed to do?!”

It’s what you’ve held back for a week now. Really, you weren’t expecting him to show up at your house and confess his undying love for you. A kiss is just a kiss. But if he was going to bring up the whole never-seeing-him-again thing, then you could do that too.

“You.” Trapdoor. He stutters and falters and lets out a sigh that deflates all the tension in his body. “My mom. Wants you to come over for dinner.”

Okay. Well. What the fuck does that mean.

“I want you to come over for dinner,” he clarifies. The furrow in his brow is one of certainty instead of confusion. His eyes meet yours, and stay locked for as long as his inner anxieties allow before he’s looking to the side and avoiding your wide-eyed stare.

Oh. Okay. That’s what. He means.

“Well,” you say out loud, because you’re an idiot and can’t ever control the words that spill out of your mouth. “Then. I would really love having dinner with you.” It’s supposed to come out determined, assured, maybe even a little flirty. Instead, it comes out awkwardly and stilted and you think you might be making a weird face at him on accident. The message clearly gets across, though, because the subtle tension in his face dissipates and he’s starting to smile at you. His stupid, awkward, tucked-in smile. You will yourself to not kiss him in the middle of the town square.

He mumbles a hazy “yeah,” and for a moment you think he sounds almost… dreamy. Lovestruck, maybe. Of course he’s not, because he’s Sebastian and you’re the farmer (th farmer that kissed him, and he kissed back, and now he’s inviting to his house for dinner, but. Well. That’s besides the point). It’s wishful thinking, but you still can’t help the way your eyes trail across his face and down and along the seam of his lips and. There’s the craving to kiss him, reignited, stirring deep in your chest and stomach and in the twitch of your fingertips.

“I guess that means we have to make plans for it,” and there’s some odd deeper meaning in his words, and his eyes are flitting to the side before coming back to you again. His lips twitch in something close to mischief, but not quite. “I guess that I should come over. To talk about plans.”

You’re smiling. You try to resist it, scared you’ll look stupid with how wide you’re grinning but you can’t help it and now you’re smiling with teeth and pressing a giggle back down your throat before you start shrieking in joy. “I think you should. I think I should walk you to my house and talk about. Dinner plans. Totally dinner plans.” Sebastian’s eyes flit to your lips for a moment, a devastating, knee-weakening palm-dampening bone-rattling moment. You’re very certain that you didn't imagine it in some infatuated haze. The corners of his lips tuck into that smile you love so much, too much, and he lets out a breathy sort of laugh. “Dinner plans.”

You walk him home—to your home, this time. There’s seeds in your right hand and the two ears of corn in his left, and your proximity as you walk makes it so that your hands brush together slightly with every step you take. His hands are dry from the cold. You don’t tell him that.

And you two don’t hold hands on the way home, because that would be silly. Because you’re just walking him to your house, to talk about dinner plans. There’s a bubble of unspoken things around the both of you, but there’s something between the looks you share with each other that makes you stop caring so much about saying things. You’re not very good at that, anyways.

You show him your favorite duck in your coop, the one you want Robin to upgrade, and then your cool cheese press machine that accounts for half the money you earn from your farm. He’s finally introduced to Kitty, who yowls at him once before padding up to him and biting his calf. You tell him it’s her love language.

And you talk about dinner plans. Or. Well. Who are you kidding. You kiss him silly. Silly and stupid in your kitchen, tugging on the sleeves and cuffs of his hoodie and then the hairs at the nape of his neck and then his fingers, trailing your own against his palm in circles and spirals and heart shapes that you’re almost embarrassed to be making. Almost. But not really.

You don’t really have the time or mind to be embarrassed, really. Not when you’re dizzy and warm and giggling into the lips of the pretty boy you’re in love with. And, not when you’re busy making dinner plans, of course.

#stardew valley x reader #sebastian x reader #sdv x reader #stardew valley #stardew valley sebastian #sebastian sdv x reader #sebastian stardew valley x reader #sebastian sdv #stardew valley x farmer #sebastian x farmer #sebastian sdv x farmer #stardew valley fanfic #sebastian fanfic #sebastian sdv fanfic #I DID IT GOOD LORD #ill write a makeout scene to make up for this #maybe #...hopefully

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victorie552 · 3 months

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Ok, so Noldolantë, "The Fall of the Noldor" is a lament composed by Maglor about what happened before, during and after First Kinslaying at Alqualondë. It's such a good song that it's played regularly in Aman and Valar listen to it often (I swear, I swear it was in the Silmarillion I just can't find it now).

It's also a more or less common fanon that Maglor continues writing Noldolante through the whole First Age. Makes sense - it's about fall of the Noldor, and Noldor did a lot of falling back then.

Headcannon time: So my first thought was that Noldolante must a long, long, long epic of a song. So it probably has many parts, right? Iliad has 24 books/parts, somehow I think Noldolante would be at least just as long, and there are longer epics. And again, just like Iliad, unless you're a scholar, in the daily life you don't really listen to/read the whole thing, just reread and repeat the most dramatic fragments. What I'm trying to impress upon you all is that the story would have different segments, or chapters, if you will.

And if Maglor continues to write the story during the FA, there would absolutely be a moment in the lament where the OG Noldolante becomes Noldolante 2, and even Noldolante 3. There may be the same musical motif or something, I decided that Maglor IS that good of a bard to keep it all consistent enough so you know it's all the same story, but the style changes a lot - it's been 400 years in the making, let The Music Elf have fun!

So, Point 1: Many, Many Parts, basically Maglor's FA WIP

My second thought was that, while Feanor invented his alphabet, elves learned their history mostly through oral tradition aka songs and spoken stories. Noldolante is definitely a historical record, where a historical event was archived for future generations.

(It was a also a way to deal with grief, guilt and blame Maglor and all Noldor have faced regarding First Kinslaying - free therapy! But that's not what this post is about)

Archived.

My 2.5 thought was that Noldolante isn't just recallings of how pretty and horrified the beach looked during the murdering or how mad and sorrowful the sea was at everyone during the voyage or even how awesome and charismatic Feanor looked during his speeches that every single Noldo was ready to fight Morgoth barehanded in his name - no, this is a record of who killed who, who got killed by whom, and how.

Noldor and Teleri knew each other (were friends, even!) before the First Kinslaying, so I'm confident that after a lot of interviews, detective work, and cross-referencing, Maglor could and would create a very good... name list. Practically every Noldo and Teler present during First Kinslaying would get a stanza in a song, more if he killed someone, most if he killed many people. Killers and killed would show up twice, first in a fragment listing the killers and their victims, then in a part listing the victims and their murderers. Basically it's the same thing twice, but from different POVs. With when, where and how included.

(It was seen to be in bad taste to compare kills during Maglor's Regency, when most of his interview-part work happened. People did it anyway. There were a Saddest Kill, Funniest Kill, and Weirdest Kill discusions. There was a Tier List. These were weird times to be a Feanorian Noldo.)

(It WAS in Bad Taste, but at least people talked about it. I cannot stress enough how much free therapy this lament provided)

(Little did they know, when Teleri started getting reembodied in Aman, they had very similar discussions, but more in a "I can't believe he killed me like THAT" way. Long, long, long after the First Age. Noldolante is a gift that keeps giving)

So, Maglor had all the historical grith and no common shame to create a "We Killed All These People And We Feel Bad About It" banger of a song, and every Noldo had a very personal reason to at least remember the fragments they are in. It's a hit on a scale never seen before.

(I'm not sure how to tackle the issue of Nolofinweans and Arafinweans learning about Noldolante after crossing the Ice. But there were discussions. There was anger, there was "????", there was controversy. Basically, the song got bigger and bigger rep no matter what your opinion on it was. By the time of Mereth Aderthad it was an important cultural and political piece and at least Fingon's forces were included in the main song. It had parodies.)

Point 2: Archive Function/Kill count storage. Cultural phenomen, every Noldo included

This is where my personal nonsense begins: Main Noldolante was done, there was nothing more to say about First Kinslaying, all killings and deaths were well documented.

But the Siege started. And the Noldor kept dying.

It was less dramatic than it sounded - between the big battles the siege was maintained, but orc raids also happened and sometimes one to few Noldor died in skirmishes. The legal procedure was to document the death of a fellow elf and send a word to king Fingolfin. The cultural procedure, technically started by Feranorians but adapted by many more, was to send the name, common characteristics and cause of death to Maglor's Gap. After few months, King Fingolfin would send reinforcements, short condolences and financial compensation if they had family. After few months, family of an elf would also receive a personal lament for them and a place for them in a Noldolante.

Yes, every lament Maglor created in that time was technically part of the Noldolante. Noldolante 1.5, if you will. Laments make in that time were very customized, and simpler than Noldolante Main, but were still considered a part of the same song. Of course, nobody was expected to know and remember laments for every single Noldo, younger Noldor born in Beleriand could even only know fragments about their family members. Only Maglor would ever know Noldolante in full, but it was understood that everyone had their place in The Song.

The results of Great Battles were harder to document, but Maglor did that. Of course, Dagor Bragollach was hard on him personally, but he worked his way through.

(High King Fingon forbade creating laments for his father. There were no songs for Fingolfin. Apart from in Noldolante, of course. Of course. Maglor did not share the lament with anyone, but he sat long hours and many nights with a blank paper before him, looking at the candle flame and thinking of the past and the future. The song unsung, but there)

Nirnaeth was... Maglor was never more hated and more approached at the same time than then. Still, Noldolante grew and grew, as if people knew the end was near.

It was Second Kinslaying that destroyed the myth of Maglor's song. Feanorians didn't know the Sindar they killed, but surely, they couldn't just left their names unmentioned like they did with orcs? So, Noldor talked, but the battle happened in caves - it wasn't uncommon to find dead bodies in empty rooms, with no witnesses to what happened. Surviving Sindar didn't want to share any names, even when Maglor strong-armed some into talking with him, and good for them. Maglor made a big lament anyway. Maglor, wild, with no shame and dead brothers, with legacy crumbling around him. Noldolante, with holes.

After Third Kinslaying, Noldor didn't want to talk. Lament for Sirion didn't have any names. Clearly, songs weren't a way to go anymore, it was always about live witnesses. And so Maglor raised the twins.

Lament for Maedhros was sung repeatedly. There was no one to hear it.

Point 3: Only Maglor knows Noldolante in full. But that doesn't matter, because everyone knows the important part: the Noldolante is finished. The Star of Hope rises in the West and the story goes on. The Fall has ended.

#silm #silmarillion #noldolante #maglor #yet another post that went in different direction than I planned #started with meta went into headcannon and ended with fanfic angst #I wanted to end it with crack!!!#I mean. I mean #it all makes kind of some sense if we're talking about elves here #but guys Noldor had Men and Dwarves as allies #Maglor would want them in his Historical Record song #I think with Dwarves they would mainly refuse when he asked them if they wanted a part in Noldolante #so maybe he would only get some allies and personal friends of Maedhros in #but Men #guys Men. they would agree and they would make lists and it would become Clown City so fast #but Sons of Feanor aren't known for their ability of knowing when to quit #so Maglor has a Noldolante 3.0 Standard Version with 254 Parts that has Elves and an Occasional Dwarf Only #and Special Version Noldolante Deluxe Extra Edition with 547398134 Parts that includes Men #everyone is included you don't have to die in battle #all common causes of death have a dedicated jingle to them #to the point you know a man's cause of death after 3 notes #these parts of Noldolante well the music bit actually survived into the Fourth Age #the words are gone but the music is played at funerals in some places #The Noldolante Main survived only in parodies though #actually Finished Noldolante is a very good thing huh #as in no more Fall of The Noldor #they can finally catch some break #I believe that during Maglor's Regency Era all Noldor did was Processing. and breeding horses.#Noldolante? more like Maglor Finally Discovers Shame: A Story #I think some personal revelations on legacy and connections between children and life's works would be made

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actual-changeling · 7 months

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okay hear me out.

michael and dagon pick nina's coffee shop as their meeting place (it's accidental at first, they're both trying to keep an eye on muriel and crowley respectively and it's a big what the FUCK are you doing here???? but then they fall in love the end) anyway they're having dates with enough sexual tension to power the whole city.

nina notices. maggie is over every single day and also notices. they're like okay those bitches are not just gay they're definitely not human. but also they're gay and we need to help them fall in love. yes? yes. okay.

in the process of that however nina gets over her lindsay heartbreak and her and maggie get closer and closer and dagon and michael get closer and it turns into one big lesbian coffee shop romance.

meanwhile you get the occasional appearance of crowley and muriel in the background and the funniest part is that the lesbians are so preoccupied with each other they stop paying attention to anything else.

so the background story is just crowley being heartbroken but then aziraphale comes back, they fix their shit etc. but no one notices bc michael is staring at dagon's lips and dagon is trying to regain their higher brain functions and nina and maggie are making out in the back.

crowley and aziraphale are happy, stopped the apocalypse again, and nip by the café just to be like "michael??? dagon???? tf are you doing here???" and they're like. wait. what are YOU doing here? fuck what time is it????? ah doesnt matter i am captivated by my lesbianism.

and then they all live happily ever after the end

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presidentofthelipglossclub · 3 months

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i have come up with a new, extremely self indulgent AU for tfrb:

basically what happens is each individual character in tfp accidentally finds out about the rescue bots, whether it's through a ground bridge mishap, an intel scouting mission, even a situation where they get rescued.

this starts out with mostly autobots, because i assume griffin rock is either in autobot territory or a neutral/unclaimed area (or it's off the grid and nobody knows about it) (i think the last one is the funniest), but the decepticons also learn about them eventually.

now. here's where the funny/self indulgent part begins. none of them know anyone else knows. the autobots AND decepticons all assume they're the only one who knows about these bots, and that the team has been trying to live a normal, calm life away from the war.

team prime doesn't know optimus and bumblebee already know, and the decepticons don't know that these guys have connections to the war. and of course, the rescue bots always manage to worm their way into every. single. bot's. spark. all of them individually grow to care about the rescue bots, and independently decide to keep them secret. nobody wants their new friends to get hurt!

anyways shenanigans of course ensue because it's very hard to keep a previously extinct group a secret from all of your friends, and since everybody knows but doesn't know everybody knows it becomes a lot of ridiculous sneaking around and badly lying to everyone.

the rescue bots are SUPER confused by all these bots who keep showing up, but they pretty much just assume that someone spilled their secret and everyone after are all showing up to meet them. eventually i think they would start to figure everything out, but they don't fully comprehend that everyone has been trying to hide them from each other until some big reveal happens.

the way this pans out is probably the end of the war honestly, because again; no one wants these guys to get hurt, physically or emotionally, and if that means having a ceasefire so be it.

#tfrb #rescue bots #transformers rescue bots #transformers aligned #tf aligned continuity #aligned continuity #tfp #transformers prime #i just think it would be funny #in my mind everyone would be trying to internally justify keeping this secret bc all the war bots are kinda out of touch w their feelings #and don't want to admit they're soft for the rescue bots #so it leads to many identity crises #they're all like “oh they could be useful in the future i don't wanna reveal this info to quickly”#or “maybe they can give our side an upper hand and if i spill they could get found and persuaded to the other side”#some specific cases i like to imagine:#shockwave would have a rly hard time trying to logic his way into keeping their secret #he can't admit he wants to help them so he just pretends he wants to experiment on them and study their abilities #which he does want but he also cares abt them #ratchet isn't the softie type so the feelings he has towards the rescue bots really off put him #he also feels bad about not telling optimus but really doesn't want to involve the rescue bots #megatron is completely in denial #he claims to want the rescue bots as a tool to eventually win the war and rebuild cybertron #but he never can bring himself to actually use them #soundwave. just any interaction between the guy who doesn't talk and a team full of the biggest gossips ever.#i love the rescue bots so much and since it's canon that everyone who knows them does as well i've decided they have irresistible charm

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skunkes · 1 month

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i feel i post this every single time but idc anyway this is always the funniest part of starting a new save

#cant say good morning bc if it was a good morning id be fishin!!!!#talkys

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mugentakeda · 3 months

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the first step ursa and azula take to soothing the severed parts of their relationship involve ursa making azula laugh.

its like a crab shedding the old shell and getting a new one, azula thinks. mother had been tense and paranoid as they made their way out of caldera city, through the colonies, onto a supply ship, and across the ocean for three whole days. then they finally landed in some random earth kingdom harbor and started walking. it wasn’t until the ocean was finally out of sight and they were surrounded by nothing but trees and dirt that mother relaxed.

and how strange is that? azula hadn’t realized that she’d never seen what her mother looks like while relaxed, until she did. it reminds azula to unclench her own jaw and loosen her own tight fists.

azula isn’t worried, though. there isnt a single man walking the earth kingdom that packs as much of a punch as lu ten does, after all. what’s a bunch of mud and rocks to lightning?

however, lu ten has been working himself like a dog picking up day long jobs and favors for any person they come across to make extra coin. they still have plenty left from the jewelry and gold trinkets they traded at the port town, but lu ten is someone that likes to be overly prepared, so he does it anyway. and on top of that, he does katas and sparring with her and zuko every morning at sunrise to make sure they shake some sparks out. until they can find a place that they know for sure they’ll be settling down in, the bending will have to be kept at a low.

so, mother tries to ease his burdens by cooking.

mother quickly discovers that she is no good at cooking.

apparently, even before being wedded to father, she had never been in a situation where she needed to cook for herself. then the servants at the palace cooked for her. but now there are no servants.

zuko took a handful of the rice mother prepared, and spat it right out. he then claims he bit down on a rock.

the sheer dismay on mother’s face combined with the disgust on zuko’s were the funniest things azula had seen in weeks.

she cackles like a hyena-lynx, and doesn’t even notice how her mother turns to her, her dismayed expression shifting to wonder.

#runaway fire fam au #<- THATS WHAT IM GONNA TAG IT AS #i think ursa and azula healing has to start with ursa healing first #and being free from ozai alone lifted so many of ursas anxieties and stress #so she finally feels like she can act like a Person again #and seeing her mom as something more than just an overbearing figure that nags at her for everything she does #is definitely beneficial to how azula sees ursa. Tbh #alicias writing stuff

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 10 months

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About the whole "Fyodor-switch personality" thing: We don't have enough information to confirm whether it was real or fake right now, and besides, both possibilities are really interesting.

If the switch was real and Fyodor was lying to cover it up (...because 'you know characters can lie, right' could mean... this part of it was the lie too...), that could easily be made a reference to Dostoevsky's The Double, as I was kindly made aware of. We've also already had an image of a young woman who looks like Aya from potentially a long time ago, given the outfit and that it is Bram's memory we're presumably seeing there, which may tie in interestingly with "what year is it?" The knife he pulled out also is genuinely a unique design for the series, and looks like it might be an old make. If this original is very old, then something in the takeover of personalities may explain why he hasn't seemed to age. Fyodor being a separate personality created from his ability and kicking out the original could tie in with his ability not attacking him in Dead Apple. This also raises more questions about Fyodor's motives, and I think opens the path for some pretty fascinating theory making. It also places Fyodor as something both human and not... intriguing for the ongoing theme of humanity in the series.

If the switch was a fake and Fyodor was being a completely hilarious little shit (which, we know the Joker is part of his inspiration and he is often contrasted with Dazai, Nikolai, and Mori, for whom this kind of behaviour would be expected - it's characterization, that's not 'done for no reason'), it would quite possibly be the funniest thing he's done in the series so far. But! More importantly, it strengthens Fyodor's connection with the Book (or rather, with altering the narrative). He's told a lie that sounds completely ridiculous but makes sense given the world and situation he's in - and notably, could fool Sigma... and the readers. Fyodor also managed to change the lightness of his eyes without changing the state of his soul - something that no other character seems to be able to do. (I know Dazai can feign the shocked expression, but that's not the clear lightness we saw in Fyodor's eyes in this panel. Nikolai's eyes change lightness but that actually seems to be genuine.) While this doesn't help us discern anything more about Fyodor's motives, it does emphasize his expertise at information manipulation - we cannot trust a single thing this character says, not just in universe, but out of it too. We, the readers, cannot listen to Fyodor and take anything he says as supporting evidence for theories. If this is true - that's fascinating. The other characters will have to solve the mystery of this man completely indirectly, and so will we.

Of course, there is the secret third option: it was a lie mostly, but there is an element of truth to it somewhere, which is actually par for the course for BSD as a whole. It is very rare that a character turns out to be lying completely. The question then becomes "what part is true and how much is it true", which is also very compelling. This, personally, is what I'm ascribing to for now until new info comes up.

Anyways, the last thing I wanted to point out is that if it was genuine, then remember The Double was inspired by Hohol's works, and if it was a lie, then that is very similar to the bait-and-switch performances that Nikolai has done multiple times in the series. Either way, it implies some influence on Fyodor by Nikolai and of course vice versa, which probably means the return of the clown (finally!) and more focus on their dynamic, which is a funny thing to show Nikolai having apparently had influence on Fyodor (even if in more of a meta way) as he is actively trying to kill him right now.

Love wins/loses?

#i also kind of have my gripes about split identity storylines... but in the end i just want whatever happens to be #the most interesting story to tell with this character #we still know nothing about fyodor and certainly not enough to know how much we can take as truth or lies #bsd #bsd chapter 108 #bsd spoilers #bsd fyodor #fyolai #storyrambles

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synnthamonsugar · 7 months

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Immaru continues to be the funniest character in.D2

GOD. THE GOING UNDERCOVER IN THE LAST CITY LORE KILLED ME. (Total aside, I didn't expect hive ghosts to be able to just ... shimmy out of their shells like that, I don't know *why* because ghosts *can* always leave their shells. Maybe because they have weird soulfire cores instead of the hard little balls of glass and metal that regular ghosts have? Which - a second layer of aside - explains why he needs to wear the sunglasses...)

Anyway...

Immaru should be the sort of character I hate with a fiery passion (funnyman who cannot only not shut up, but needs to shit talk everyone constantly) but can't because I too think Savathun is the universe's best, smartest, specialest and funniest woman who has suffered so, so badly and is so correct about everything and should thus be allowed to do whatever she wants forever. Which immediately makes me sympathetic to him. He's also a clueless little orb of impotent rage who could be physically rended apart with a single well placed squeeze, which frankly lights up some masochistic "put that obnoxious man in situations" part of my brain like a christmas tree.

The fact that Savathun obviously loves him but is also aware enough that he can't be trusted with her plans is hysterical, we love a woman who REFUSES to be codependent even if she kinda like, on an ontological level, needs to be codependent given the nature of the Guardian-Ghost bond. I like that he's not particularly upset about this.

Like Sav, he seems more invested in the overall goal of protecting the Light / Traveler than allegiance to any particular group, which I also feel immensely sympathetic toward. Fundamentally I can't disagree with him that we should have let Sav steal/protect the Traveler, even though that would have ended extremely badly for the residents of Sol. I don't care who bashes the Witness' shit in, I just want someone, anyone, to.

Dearly hoping we get to see him and Sav actually interact before this arc of the story is closed up.

#destiny #immaru #savathun #asks

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fictarian · 10 months

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Hobie x goth reader 👹

𝐇𝐢𝐦 <𝟑 . ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 𝐏𝐭. 𝟕

ღ I’m actually so in love with goth aesthetic, so I will GLADLY do this request. A goth love interest for Hobie just sounds so fitting, since all the times that i’ve met a person with a love for goth, they were either really laid back and chill or absolutely HILARIOUS

ღ ALSO WE REACHED 100 FOLLOWERS IN A WEEK HELLO??? THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH YOU GUYS RAHHHH

ღ Expect a double upload today, since I have to make up for yesterday ‼️‼️

ღ I’ll either cook up something for the 100 follower special, or i’ll get requests from you guys so don’t you worry xo

ღ Anyways, here are some Hobie x GN Goth! Reader headcannons 😈

ღ I used this website to get a better grasp on the aesthetic, and it was actually a very interesting read so I highly recommend you check it out. Shout out to my goth pookies, you’re the coolest people on the planet, and often times, the funniest 🫶🏻

ღ Previous part can be found here !

• If your love language is receiving/giving gifts and words of affirmation, I could totally see the reader writing very heartfelt poems about his personality traits, physical appearance, or literally just anything about him and putting into words just how much those parts about him mean to you.

• You try and limit how much you write, but it’s literally Hobie you’re writing about. So it can’t be helped that you write a good 2-3 pages worth of validating and loving words.

• And EVERY single time Hobie reads a poem you gift him, it makes him fall head over heels for you all over again. And for the next couple of days, he stared at you with SUCH a intense stare , no matter if you guys were in public or in private. And if you really got Hobie in his feels, he would start writing an original song for you.

• And you would be the only one to hear it. You two would be cuddling your bed at around midnight, staring into each others eyes lovingly while Hobie quietly strummed his guitar and sang you your song. His voice would be so quiet and gentle, but it would also be laced with roughness like how he usually sings. You’d just be laying there, nearly brought to tears with how soft he was being around you. The moment would be so sweet and intimate and it just makes me BAWL.

• Something that the two of you share and bond over is each other’s sense of humor. Dark humor, to be exact. If one of you cracks a joke around the other and a group of people, they’d stare in horror from what they just heard while you two would be giggling and cracking up.

• If you were a spider person, you guys would make it a challenge to make jokes during a meeting between the spider people and Miguel WITHOUT laughing.

• These are the times when the jokes are the funniest and hit you guys harder, since you guys are both equally competitive and like to poke fun at one another. One time, you were brought to tears from how funny the jokes Hobie had whispered to you were but you just COULDN’t laugh, and that caused Hobie to nearly break and cackle as well.

• It had gotten so bad to the point that Miguel had to SEPARATE you both just so he could have your focus and so that you two didn’t distract anyone else.

• Of course, that didn’t stop you guys. You guys side eyed each other from across the room when Miguel’s back was turned, and that was the day you broke.

• Miguel sent you both out of the room when you couldn’t cease your giggling, and neither of you could breath for the next couple of minutes due to laughter. You couldn’t even get a word out, because that would only make you laugh harder and cause Hobie to do the same 😭✋

• Let’s be fr here, you would be a GOD at doing makeup. Eyeshadow and eyeliner to be specific. So much so that Hobie would request for you to do his, since he thinks his makeup job looks like SHIT compared to yours.

• He’d let you sit on his lap when you applied it, which was a huge mistake on his end.

• Hobie could NOT stop staring at you, even when you told him to close his eyes so that it would be easier for you to apply eyeshadow, eyeliner, WHATEVER you needed to do.

• He just couldn’t help himself. You were literally so close to him, and Hobie felt like he was looking at a god whenever he looked up at you. Sitting still and not grabbing you took all his willpower alone, but not being able to look at you in all your glory? You were asking for too much at that point.

• Not even when you were halfway done, Hobie just couldn’t take it any more. It’s not his fault you’re so damn gorgeous 🤦‍♀️

• After a couple of minutes, Hobie ended up with lipstick smudged on his lips and on parts of his face and could NOT be any happier. Vice versa with you, but it was also the day that you decided that you’d just teach him how you did your make up instead of doing it for him.

• Hobie was not having that though, and somehow convinced you to ‘do’ his make up the next time. And the time after that.

tag list ! @zalayni @luvstarrstruck @jrrantss @pixqlsin @kairiscorner @k4tsu3 @asmobeuses

#across the spiderverse #atsv #hobie brown #hobie brown x reader #hobie x reader #spider punk x reader #atsv headcanons #headcannons #fluff #fluff headcanons #atsv hobie #hobie headcanons #hobie spiderverse #hobart brown #hobie x you

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once-in-a-blood-moon · 26 days

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Obey Me Boys as Band Kids

Please note that these are personal things I've noticed in my time as a former band kid, and is not meant to be taken too seriously. I love all the sections equally and all the weirdos in them, haha. Anyways, go band kids! 💪

Inspired by the new event coming out! 🤗

Lucifer is a trumpet player. He’s got one of the biggest egos in the band and plays loud and proud even if he’s wrong (which is rare). Lucifer is that kid that takes his instrument home every single day to practice and shows off the next day. Takes band seriously, and is very popular among his peers. Mad that he didn’t get drum major position, but never shows it when asked.

Mammon plays snare drum. Literally could use what’s left of his brain cells rattling around in his head instead. A troublemaker, probably gets betted to do stupid things every other week, which just causes more stress for the drum major and the band director. Though it makes for good stories later. One of the weakest marchers, loses the beat halfway and is now marching right, left, right…

Leviathan is a sax player, do not tell me he’s not. Most of the sax players I knew were NERDS, so dorky, but some of the funniest people you will ever meet. They’re either really popular or terribly socially inept, Levi falls on the socially inept spectrum. He’s not too serious, but not a total blowoff in the band. He plays super quiet out of fear of playing wrong, but if there’s a song he likes, he gets really into it. Probably one of those guys that puts the whole reed in his mouth and swishes it around to wet it as everyone else is appalled by it.

Satan is the drum major (me too 😊). Responsible and stressed, cordial with all, friendly with some. He knows the ins and outs of everything going on within the band, whether it’s gossip, inside jokes, the literal music itself (that’s a given), etc. He probably has little pow-wows with the section leaders where he gets his information, specifically the colorguard captain. Has a solid connection with the drumline.

Asmo is captain of the colorguard! Gossip and drama, and part of the band's discount Keeping Up With the Kardashians show (I swear that’s what it’s like). He’s a perfectionist, probably stays late after school to practice his routines. Has a meltdown at the smallest mistake, yells at others when they mess up. He’s definitely hit someone with a flag because they were in his way or in the wrong spot, iykyk.

Beel is a tuba player. He probably keeps to himself, maybe befriending the trombone or trumpet players and opening up a little there. His mom brings the band snacks and food for games. New to band so he’s learning how to play and march properly. Still hasn’t learned to suck in his cheeks when he plays.

Belphie is a clarinet player (also me 💅). He’s probably a squeaker. Makes hard eye-contact with the drum major as he licks his reed wet with a sly grin just to mess with them. He’s a great player, he just needs to be louder, no one can hear him. Leans on his clarinet when his eyes get droopy when he’s sitting down.

Diavolo is in the drumline, probably a bass or quad player. If he’s a quad player, there will never be a time you won’t hear him playing. Every five seconds he’s playing some part of the cadence, and somehow the rest of the drumline joins in. If he’s a bass player, he’s just a derpy guy who’s just there for a good time. Joins the tromboners in their mischief and jokes.

Barbatos gives pit energy to me, think marimba and bells. He quietly practices in the back, waving his mallets over the notes so he doesn’t disturb anyone. Very attentive to the drum major and band director when they speak, never has an outburst of any kind. He’s responsible, and timely when preparing for a show. Probably keeps the drumline in check though. (Also plays cymbals during parades).

Simeon is a flute player, specifically piccolo. He’s a beast on that thing, and so loud (watch your ears). Gossips and chats with the clarinet section, is an honorary member of that section too. I bet he has that flute pinky thing, iykyk.

Solomon is… *sighs* a trombone player… He’s one of the guys in the back making “that’s what she said'' jokes when the director says something that can be twisted that way. Makes the whole band crack up at his funny quips. He’s a skilled marcher and is incredibly dedicated to the band. Sometimes empties his spit valve on other people’s shoes just to mess with them (think Lucifer specifically).

Luke is an aspiring trumpet player! He’s doing his best, so cheer him on when you can. One of those insecure, doesn’t want to be too loud trumpet players. But you can never be too loud…unless it says pianissimo…

#slightly rushed sorry if i missed anything #obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me nightbringer #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke #jo's thoughts

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beautifulpersonpeach · 3 months

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Hi, Peach! I'm relatively new to the fandom and I tried to avoid shipping part of it bc I'm Jungkook biased and it's annoying how he's shipped with virtually every single person on this planet but I got swept by how whipped he seems with Jimin and now I'm inevitably a Jikooker stan too.

I'm currently watching BV2 and there was this clip of Jimin playing footsies with Kook that I came across a long time ago and I thought it was taken out of context, but now that I'm watching original content, Kook's reaction kinda got me wondering if it's not actually edited to appear something other than what it is (but to be fair, this is the reason I'm a Jikook and not a Taekook stan, most of Jikook content isn't edited, they're just unhinged like that). There also seems to be a similar situation in BV3 between Jikook, and I'm curious to what other people think about it, so I came here bc I like sensible Jikook/ot7 blogs.

Have you maybe seen theories ab these scenes and what do you think of them?

***

I would hardly call this a "sensible jikook/ot7 blog" btw... just setting expectations lol.

You know one of my favourite things about Bon Voyage 3 is that you can very clearly see how much closer jikook have become in a year, because it's such a good contrast compared to how they were in Bon Voyage 2. Jikook are even more all over each other in BV3, we see them stay behind on the boat to have the moon scene, we get 'together bam', and honestly too many sweet moments to count. Jikook in 2018 were like nothing I'd seen nor have seen since. Everything that happened after BTS decided in 2018 to fuck it all and do BTS, the year that perhaps coincidentally, jikook became undeniably closer on a deeper and more obvious level, everything that's happened since then feels like a given.

Including jikook signing up to do their military service via the buddy program, to return by Festa 2025.

Anyway, I digress.

I'm not really sure what the theories are, about the scenes you're referring to. Here, I'd like to refer you to @stormblessed95 - she's great at knowing stuff about jikook and she keeps better tabs on them than I do. Because personally, I don't think there's much to theorize about beyond the fact that jikook give each other footsies and sometimes do it on camera. It's kinda nsfw. In fact it most likely is nsfw. But jikook are always jikooking, and so here we are.

In fact, hold up, correct me if I'm wrong but haven't jikook given each other footsies in every single BV? Because we get some foot action in BV 4 as well (and in my opinion that's the funniest and most embarrassing one for JK I'm sorry to say. Like I full on howled when I first noticed it. The poor lad was helpless.

Jimin is vicious y'all...)

Anyway, I'm sorry anon but there's no "sensible or ot7" way to say this: jikook kinda play footsies sometimes and sometimes the cameras catch their antics.

Make of that what you will.

#jikook #jimin #jungkook

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vwoop-prince · 3 months

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spoilers for the pjo show episodes 1-7

as of 10pm pst 25/01/2024 i have finished watching episode 7 of the pjo show and i was going to wait and see the final episode before posting my thoughts but i feel like critisism is fine at all points of a show so. this accidentally turned into the majority of my points & some are just poking fun/funny notes

some notes before i get into complaining: im having fun. this is fun for me. complaining about differences is fun for me. if its not for you, dont read this. i also havent even read mark of athena EVER and the last time i properly read a pjo book was in 2021. ive been skimming the first book alongside watching the episodes. and i am not seriously pissed off about the show as a whole. there are parts im pissed off at. there are parts that i think are fucking hilarious comparatively. there are parts im neutral on. i dont hate this show on principle just bc its not the books.

anyway the funniest takeaway from this adaptation is that we can literally complain down to a single grain of sand. if that vibe isnt what you like, maybe dont open the read more

yeah its hilarious how they changed the "grover nearly falls into tartarus" scene from gravel floor in the books to a sand floor in the show. idk why they did it but i can complain down to a single fuckin grain of sand. this is hilarious

look okay i love hades. just. period. in the actual myths, in the pjo books, how most people characterize him as a whole, and how i worship him as a pagan. notice how i didnt mention the show. like. show!hades is fine. hes just not book!hades. not even CLOSE. wheres the yelling? the "and I will have my helm back!" wheres the "He was the third god I'd met, but the first who really struck me as godlike." in the show hes just flamboyant. in the books hes a drama King and rightfully angry and complains about the state of his realm. whyd they do this to him. what the fuck

on the topic of godly gods. only hermes and hades have seemed like gods. hermes more than hades. ares, dionysus, and hephaestus are all just Guys. just some fuckin dudes. and the only reason hermes and hades actually seem like Gods is bc of their attitude/dialogue/mannerism and the scenery around them respectively. not combined. respectively.

i would LOVE to see the mental gymnastics percy had to do to guess that kronos is behind this shit. in the books there are five times kronos is mentioned. 1: as the first mythological being ever mentioned. 2: talking about the big three's dad before percy gets his prophecy. 3: when percy questions what it was like before the gods' time just before going on the quest. 4: when percy is speaking to zeus and poseidon alone on olympus. 5: when percy realizes who luke serves. they do NOT explicitly state that its kronos in the underworld. percy doesnt even finish his THOUGHT of who gave him the bag with the bolt before he tries to make amends with a pissed off hades. hes not able to explain to hades that it was ares EVER.

typical "oh percys so much smarter in the show than in the books" except its the kids are so much smarter about the myths than they should be. and like i Understand okay? i get it. sally made sure to grow percy up on the myths so hes prepared. annabeth has been at camp for five years, learning all she can as a child of athena. grover is in his mid twenties and a satyr. a protector. of course they should know shit. but figure it all out before even meeting the monsters? they knew it was medusa as soon as they saw the 'aunty m' sign. they knew it was procrustes before even ENTERING the building. why? why not have the kids be blindsided by shit? especially with medusa, who is meant to have either an enchantment-type thing like cc's island or who can bend the mist to have an enchantment-like thing that fooled annabeth. and crusty worked so fast they didnt have time to compare notes before grover and annabeth were trapped on their beds. why do they immediately know whats going on? wheres the suspense? wheres the showing not telling?

i always thought sally wouldve been yknow Normal just frozen in time and with gold dust around her similar to the sulphur of monsters disintegrating. not that she Was Gold. its like they really wanted to show off their fake gold statues idea

remember how hades looked in the show. now heres a screenshot of percy describing him. they are not the same (yes im salty about it)

How Fucking Dare they skip Persephone's garden. Why. absolutely Why. yes i do worship her too and im so damn salty theres not even a MENTION of her in ep 7

did i mention that the area around the pit to tartarus is meant to be gravel and not sand? bc its meant to be gravel. and they sure as hell couldntve leasurely stuck around it to chat bc its meant to INHALE. ITS MEANT TO TRY AND SUCK THE KIDS IN.

btw the 4 pearls? im fine with that. grover shouldve lost his on the tumble towards tartarus and we shouldve seen it fuckin fly away and watch the kids watch it plummet to the bottom. hell having a little after credits scene at the end of ep 8 where a random monster gets sent to the beach bc the pearl landed on them and shattered wouldve been HILARIOUS.

the missed deadline however? no. bullshit. 'its so the lotus can be even more dangerous' my ass. percys determined to see this quest through to the end, determined to stop the war before it fully starts, and yet theres no urgency. id even say theres LESS urgency than the books where they had a DAY to get the bolt & get to zeus (with added helm to hades & ares fight). sure it didnt make much sense for ALL THAT to be within a DAY but yknow what? time is fucky and they couldve had the underworld take like three overworld minutes yknow?

speaking of the war theyve know it could happen since the WINTER SOLSTICE. its now passed the SUMMER SOLSTICE. 'your father must rally his men' WHAT HAVE THEY BEEN DOING FOR HALF A YEAR??? SITTIN ON THEY ASSES TWIDDLIN THEIR THUMBHS???

lets go back to hades's aura btw bc ares didnt even have his. not a single fucking deity has had their aura. there was nothing with dionysus about madness and grapes (no scared reaction from percy), no war and fighting with ares (no weird anger from percy), and no hades feeling like he owns your very soul. why? whys there no aura? that might be the biggest reason none of these guys feel like gods to me

where's perseus "sass & improv" jackson. theres no "lord and uncle, i come with two requests". theres no "who said anything about dreams?". theres no fucking "big bathtub" no "circus caravan" not even fucking "you look taller"

why didnt the other flying shoe kick them on the head. cmon guys

the souls in asphodel arent ALWAYS bound with regret and their choices (or lackthereof) in life. sometimes thats where the ordinary go. thats where the regular ass people go, or the people that dont want to even have a chance of going to the fields of punishment. you got this right in the books, why did you revert to this in the show?

also no hint of hazel? i dont care if we never get to hoo. we might not get to titans curse, making the nico & bianca hint useless. im not sayin they shouldve casted someone as hazel for that scene, im not sayin she shouldve been the only root-bound spirit talking (dislike that idea, btw, what happened to wandering spirits thatre not spooky. theyre just sad.). one of the root-bound spirits just having fucking crystals sprouted up next to them wouldve been good enough.

also yeah wheres elysium and the fields of punishment

WHEN DID GROVER GET HIS MEMORY BACK

WHY DID HE EVEN LOSE ANY TO BEGIN WITH

charon would never turn down that much money

book sally and show sally are two different people

also not once has there been a mention of a monster smell?? of the underground smelling like monsters, of grover's distaste for being under ground, for anything like that???

speaking of grover. why isnt he eating shit. wheres his tin cans. his diet coke cans. his pinochle cards. his hacky-sack apple that he accidentally eats that gets the kids to be kids. whyd annabeth have to throw shade at him in the lotus scene about eating shit when hes not eaten a single non-edible thing in this entire show.

oh have i mentioned that they just got rid of every single fucking bit of foreshadowing the books ever have btw? bc holy shit lemme rant and this is somethin im GENUINELY pissed about

annabeth doesnt realize it could be kronos on the cab ride bc theres no cab ride. theres no 'its hades. it has to be'.

kronos is not the first mythological being mentioned

all these dreams??? not a single one was even important nor was luke even in one as a voice like i remember most of the first books dreams i dont remember any of the show.

no thalia hint in a dream which. okay i guess. dont want to cast her too early. but cmon man casting a thalia and changing her actor when she gets out of the tree wouldve been like an easter egg to messing up her eyecolor in the books. it wouldve been funny for the readers. cmon guys

the only hint we have of luke disliking his dad is when percys just about to leave for his quest and not? throughout the weeks percy spends at camp? Why

LUKE DOESNT EVEN THROW ANNABETH AND GROVER UNDER THE BUS IN THE SHOW. WHY. no 'youd have to be invisible' no 'maybe this time no one will turn into a tree'???

also dislike how we get all of the thalia lore basically Immediately wheres that slow release story that we gotta piece together alongside percy

oh gods another thing i fucking HATE: THERES NO SWORD TRAINING SCENE. theres also no showing that percy is rejuvinated via water/rain/is good with boats/horses that is like small foreshadowing that hes a son of poseidon but THERES NO SWORD TRAINING. THERES NO 'lukes the greatest sword fighter in decades!' compared to the final book where percys the best sword fighter now, theres no 'really difficult sword technique done first try' theres NONE OF THAT. WHYYY

the whole annabeth and percy were each other's tethers in the lotus casino is an early percy using annabeth as his tether in the styx and them sticking together in tartarus yes but also. why they gotta figure out the lotus immediately. wheres the fucking charm and enchantment though? wheres the ''its 1977' 'its WHAT'' wheres annabeth playing her architect sims wheres grover killing polluting humans wheres the fun. wheres the dawning horror that somethings not right. wheres the terrifying realization that percy nearly forgot his mother's name, that they have a quest, that they dont remember how long its been

hot take: lin manuel maranda is a fine hermes. i didnt even know who he was until i asked my dad btw. hes a jumpscare for yall hamilton nerds. im built dif (dislikes musicals)

take this copy-paste from my discord notes bc tumblr is lagging as im writing this:

they made grover smarter here than the books and i do like that tbh. him manipulating ares into giving some answers. him realizing that theyre not eating lotuses and augustus is still forgetting even new shit. and then grover forgetting what he was doing before augustus & pan in the same breath. i feel like theyre just using grover in place of longer and more drawn out back-n-forth convos & scenes though and that i dont like

TALKING ABOUT MAY NOW WAS GOOD. LEARNIGN THAT SHE WENT MAD FROM LOOKING INTO THE FUTURE? NOT GOOD. LEAVE US MORE OF A MYSTERY GUYS THAT COULDVE BEEN MENTIONED IN SEASON 3 BY THALIA OR SOMETHIN

also can they stop splitting up the kids. look i think the fields of asphodel was like that bc scheduling conflict with leah? right? why split aryan up from them TWICE tho with waterland and lotus tho. we dont need percabeth shit rn guys theyre TWELVE and prob didnt have crushes crushes until the next year at the earliest (spoken from someone that didnt ship percabeth until the kiss at mt st helens)

oh yeah have i mentioned that them blaming clarisse is Awful. its Terrible. they owe that girl the biggest fucking apology. yes i know percy threw clarisse out in his talk with ares on the beach but im pretty sure its never stated ever again and not before that

also? clarisse being a bully bc she cant fathom that percy fucked up the minotaur? why? why isnt she just a bully for the sake of it?

i dont think theyve even named her spear though. no ones called it lamer. no ones said it was a gift from ares

also im pissed at them saying ares doesnt care for his kids/hates them. no he doesnt. (insert that one myth people were throwing around about him killing his daughters assaulter) as well as clarisse being is favorite daughter in a while. she got the chance to get that fuckin chariot thing from her godly brothers or whatever i read that mini story once an wasnt paying too much attention. is ares a good dad? no. no mythical being is a good parent period. does he hate his kids? no

logic issue: how the fuck do the roller coasters in the lotus work. when they first pan up to look at the outside theres people on roller coasters and theyre on the OUTSIDE of the building. does the time bubble extend to them? then why are they normal-paced when the lotus moves far slower than the outside world? or are the roller coasters outside the bubble, but because of the time fuckery, it kinda just looks like they blip out of existence for less than a blink and are straight back inside the casino? and the lotus in the air makes them not question the rapidly changing outside world's appearance?

"we take a zebra to vegas" no zebra

writers stop writing monotheistic views into polytheistic worlds challenge. WHY dont monsters attack on sunday??? huh??? bc i dont know that historical connection to ancient, before 1AD, greece. please. enlighten me as to why ancient greek monsters from the ancient greek polytheistic religion wouldnt attack demigods on something known as 'the lord's day' anytime after 1AD. enlighten me. and then explain to me why MONSTERS care

i will say im glad they kept annabeth's mess up with the IM. "show me camp half-blood. chiron's office." compared to "half-blood hill." she was a bit more specific sure and it could bring the question of why luke was in chiron's office in the show.

first: how percy tossed the coin was shit and shouldntve gone that far. second: was that a reference to jason grace.

is getting an IM signal a new thing? as in "not percy jackson and the olympians" thing, and a "heroes of olympus and higher" thing? bc ive never heard of that, and it makes sense for a prism. which also makes sense for them to have since IMs are very important. just sucks that the water mist isnt gonna foreshadow sea of monsters when percy creates a mist so lukes confession has more witnesses (& the like dozen other times that percy makes mist for an IM, showing his power & control on such a minute scale, showing that hes way out of almost anyones league in power scale)

idk why they didnt have ares hoard knowledge on sally over percy's head to try and get him to do the quest. whyd they have him use poseidon ("your dad had plenty of kids he stopped caring about once he lost interest") to rile percy up? oh thats right bc theres no fucking aura

i dont see the point in changing hephaestus's trap. maybe it wouldve costed too much to do the spiders and water and net or somethin (what else is the 12-15 mil per ep being spent on? hope its not that fancy screen thing that honestly was kinda obvious in some scenes and not good oops). anyway i didnt like the change to the throne, didnt like the self sacrifice (theyre really hammering that in), and i didnt really like them changing it to immediately showing it was hera that threw hephaestus off olympus? i feel like having one more thing against zeus for a while wouldve been good, or at least waiting until annabeth and hephaestus somehow got on that topic so hephaestus can correct annabeth

speaking of correcting annabeth: the medusa scene? where annabeth is all 'youre wrong bc my mother is just'? they shouldve had conflicting myths. i can understand doing the most modern retelling of medusa's myth (bonus points for it being roman in origin) bc the gods and monsters are heavily susceptible to belief. if enough people believe that retelling of the myth, then of course its gonna become the "true" one. they shouldve had annabeth argue that thats the roman myth and this is greek, or that medusa's story was modern and she knows the most ancient version we know of (ie: medusa & her sisters were always monsters). them talking about the same myth? doesnt really make sense, unless that was the only surviving medusa myth that just so happened to be the "truth". doesnt help the 'constantly shifting capital of power' thing

speaking of that: was that even mentioned? in the show? that the gods shift to the place with the most power? i dont think it was. why.

back to hephaestus and the shield tho: wheres aphrodite's scarf.

percy EXPLAINING myths to ANNABETH??? the seat myth with hera n whatnot??? WHAT. book 1 annabeth would NEVER

"it's like people only see what they wanna see and ignore anything at all that doesn't fit the story they like to tell themselves" / "exactly! like you being the one to find the lightning thief and not her." i didnt understand that leap in thought btw. very confused.

percy saying 'from an orthodontist's office maybe'. ow. gods. im not that much older than him and i recognize that from my dad playing it. an ortho office. oof (couldnt tell you the title or artist tho dont care that much bout it)

oh yeah this is the ONLY time we get a 'satyrs dont eat meat' thing. "satyrs eat tofu" ares says. like i know percy & grover swapped something on their sandwiches in the first episode but do you really think id be able to recognize what they swapped?

oh yeah speaking of the first ep: bit disappointed they didnt do the digenerative leg disease thingie as a cover for grovers legs. i mean. makes sense. dont want to downplay that disability. also consider though: grovers legs arent human legs & he needs a cover for why he cant do some things & shouldnt do others, and a leg issue wouldve been the best choice

also the no mist on his legs throughout the entire quest? dont like that tbh. i dont care that this isnt in JUST percy's pov anymore. the mist should affect shit outside camp

speaking of the mist. where the fuck is it. was it even mentioned once. its not a thing in the show for some fuckinggg reasonnnnnnnn

annabeth trying to rile ares up btw? what the fuck? plus grover not being scared shitless & doing the beach talk on his own in the diner? dislike. this is what happens WITHOUT THE AURA

oh yeah the diner is just called 'diner' in the show btw and that was hilarious bc theres so many places just called 'place'. ive seen small walk in clinics just called 'clinic'. diners called 'diner'. bars called 'bar'. place for hearing aids LITERALLY CALLED 'HEARING AIDS'. its funny

take this discord screen shot about some of the ares diner thing bc copy pasting as straight text would make this longer and rewriting it is not in the cards (yes i numbered all my complaints and made live notes to myself)

not aging the show. name drops twitter. like im sorry guys if you show a car or a phone then youre aging the show but did you have to name drop TWITTER of all things???

have i mentioned theyre meant to IM luke before ares btw. have i also mentioned that the kids get to the diner first and ares appears then. small timeline changes i no likey (only half joking)

imma be real i dont like that they changed it so annabeth witnesses the fates cut the string. dont like it that grover doesnt pay attention until its passed. dont like that percy is NONCHALANT about it when hes told. be chalant man. book percy knew it was a big deal even when he didnt know shit.

(insert the continuity error of waterland near denver colorado and the arch in like illinois or somethin and theyre now WALKING in the show when its a two day TRAIN ride in the books that everyone already talked about)

ah right THEY DONT SHOW THE FIRST NEREID TALK. WHY. also WHY IS PERCY WET. WHY DID HE STILL NOT KNOW HE CAN BREATHE. WHY DIDNT THEY SHOW THAT WHATEVER PERCY TOUCHES CAN STAY DRY WITH THE LIGHTER. THAT WAS SO COOL

i do like the change that percy doesnt pray to poseidon when he gets off the arch. i was going to say jumps off but then i remembered that he fell off in the show which was definitely a change that im not neutral on but im not 100% on if it was positive or negative

what happened to the clear sighted mortal btw

i dislike how echidna and the chimera were handled. again. what happened to being blind sided. what happened to shock and sudden appearances. i dont care if the chimera was learning to hunt. the realization that echidna was a monster with her forked tongue was great.

i was going to write "wheres the suicidal thoughts" (ie percy thinking the monster wont attack mortals if he dies/jumps out of the arch) then remembered that this isnt 1st person and theres no voice over (which wouldve made this show 1000% better)

okay. so. they dont show percy nailing the difficult sword technique, but they DO show him getting hits on the chimera. when in the books he doesnt get a single hit on the chimera. to quote my disc notes: percy gets precisely ZERO hits on the chimera. first slash at neck, deflected by a collar that name-drops Tartarus. second slash at the mouth just after the tail stabbed his leg, tail wrapped around leg and pulled him around dropping riptide down the hole. again, poison Immediate

right the poison not being immediate. im. why

WHY DIDNT PERCY GO THROUGH THE CHIMERA'S FIRE BLAST. IT WOULDVE SHOWN HIS RESISTANCE TO FIRE AS A SON OF POSEIDON THATS PLAYED WITH BIT MORE IN SEA & LABRYNTH

the rivers meant to be way more polluted btw

i do like the accurate change to the arch tho. showing that the water reached up and grabbed him was kinda the "duh" answer but if you read this scene plainly without much thought then yeah in the books the arch goes over the river so. it wasnt even that much of a discussion point bc pjo universe architecture was different i guess

anaklusmos is meant to fall out the arch during the fight, not further in, and percy's meant to have a good length of time standing on the arch without the sword returning to his pocket

have i mentioned that so far all these monster fights are disappointing and lackluster

oh btw the taxi scene after lotus? fucking hate how thats MORE dramatic than the actual MONSTER FIGHTS

the arch being a temple to athena or whatever? nice change, dont really like how it replaced more architecture talk tho. shouldve been an add-on in the middle of annabeths geeking out bout the math n structure that percy tries to focus on but annabeth shrugs it off and goes on about the perfect balance of the lean-to stuff (i dont know architecture)

her "so poseidon can't ruin it" about the earthquake protection plate things though? rude and not what show annabeth shouldve said since theres been no/little "poseidon vs athena" rivalry talk (besides annabeth praying to her mom and getting shunned & percy not praying and getting saved. that was a good parallel).

adding indigenous folk to grover's talk of genocide & erasure was good, just wish there was more on it & throughout more of the quest

them throwing in the "not all monsters are monsters" and "not all demigods are heroes" talk seemed kinda half-assed and like they didnt really know where to go with it. i like it bc itll be expanded on with like circe a bit & zoë & ethan nakamura / luke / the demigods on the titan's army & especially with tyson all throughout sea. but like. if i hadnt read the books then id think they added those points just bc they were expected to, especially since its not even brought up again in later episodes

wasted opportunity for not saying "Isn’t that a kind of anteater?" what happened to my sassy boy you didnt have to change the sass guys that line is still funny pleaseee

rip gladiola & rip the signs of life whenver pan is mentioned

okay so i could understand the centaurs in the first book not partying bc maybe rick didnt think of that until the next one but? the show centaurs not partying? sure maybe its not the party ponies maybe its another sector/group but like. cmon. i wouldve laughed if they had those glow stick necklaces & a disco ball & shit

what latched onto the outside of the train car btw. what monster was that. i couldnt tell

1st what does froofy mean 2nd that was good dialogue on grovers part

annabeth & percys talk about thalia/luke/her dad... genuinely i dont have much thoughts on it (good or bad) besides that i reread lukes diary after watching that episode & luke & thalia were fine with annabeth joining them. thalia was proud that luke acted how he did with her. didnt really like that she said she had to "earn it" with thalia

ah yes. the dream just before the thalia talk. what the hell did kronos mean "she is coming" was he, for some stupid fucking reason, warning them about echidna??? the nereid??? OR DID HE MEAN GAEA. DID HE FUCKING MEAN HIS MOTHER. WHAT IN THE HELL

how they showed that olympus is connected to the empire state building at the end of ep 3? dislike that. doubly dislike how hermes already knew what was in the box before anyone opened it

"hermes express" hermes, walking to the elevator in the empire state building when we know for a fact they can just beam anywhere:

them not showing DOA at all & not showing the address to the underworld in medusa's area? didnt like that at all, felt less like a scavanger hunt & more like a fetch quest (ik getting the bolt is a fetch quest, but this is like double fetch quest instead of one part fetch one part egg hunt)

ANYONE LEARNING ABOUT THE BETRAYAL PART OF THE PROPHECY BTW??? DIDNT LIKE THAT. PREFERED WHEN PERCY WAS TRYING TO GO AROUND THE PROPHECY/NOT THINK ABOUT IT. also the betrayal hasnt been mentioned since except when they decided to blame clarisse, but that was as the lightning thief & not friend betrayal

okay so the bus scene & them turning a fury (alecto?) to stone. didnt like the changes. i feel like they changed it so percy's mortal kill count doesnt start so young (half joking) but it kinda gets rid of the whole "the gods dont take into account how their emotions/reactions affect mortals". plus the hurricane isnt sudden in montauk, it builds since percy uses the fountain

them shortening the yancy time btw? will agree it makes sense, dont agree that its better/even a neutral change. it gets rid of the gaslighting, the mist, the first instance of the winter solstice, this:

have i mentioned they got rid of all the fucking foreshadowing GODS IT PISSES ME OFF

okay back to medusa. her not being able to get you if shes invisible? isnt how i imagined her eyes working in pjo & the myths. also i understand not wanting to show beheading in a "kids show" but also why invisible you can just have it happen just off screen until they get it in a bag (which yeah wouldve been fundementally the same as invisible but cmon)

dislike the medusa plan change. 'i'll get in the air & draw her attention' thats literally the opposite of what they wanted in the books

WHY WAS THERE FIRE ON THE STAIRS WHY DID THE BASEMENT LOOK LIKE THAT WHY WAS IT A BASEMENT & NOT LIKE A BIG GARAGE-TYPE THING (my dad explained that the fire could have been a reference to the 1981 clash of titans with the flickering suspense kind of scary but may i point out: that would be a reference to a 1981 thing in a modern kids show)

good to know her veil material is enough to block her gaze btw though. like that was a thin material and it was ENOUGH??? you didnt even have to make her invisible you probably couldve just worn your shirt on your head & saw through the tiny holes

mother/son possible relationship between medusa and percy WAY BETTER than the grooming that happens & i could definitely see as a possibility. a wild possibility but its possible

the cgi for the nereid was terrible btw. the sound for the sizzling in the percy & medusa convo was so fake. the straw empty noise grover does drinking his lemonade should not be possible with how much was actually left in his cup. that pastry grover ate should not have crunched.

copy paste of a disc note: "and you are a liar" telling the person who is centuries older than you. from a time where the gods were actively worshipped. that they are a liar about what happened to them???? what in the FUCK

another copy paste note: "my mother is just. always" is your mother the goddess of what is just??? the goddess of justice??????? no. what the fuck

the slow release of medusa's "true" myth annoyed me bc every time new info came up i was like "oh so its this myth" and then more came up and i was like "okay its this iteration" and then more info came and i just about yelled in frustration

"i dont like bullies" giving percy's lines to medusa

another copy paste note: "WE'RE NOT OUR PARENTS AFTER ALL" IS WHAT PERCY SAYS ON THE CAR RIDE WITH ARGUS TO NY PROPER. WHICH MAKES ANNABETH STOP BEING AS ANTAGONISTIC

another copy paste: theres a reason aunty em in the books used fast food containers for her food and NOT REFLECTIVE SHIT. WHAT IS THIS SILVER COVER. YOU SPEAK OF THE MEDUSA MYTH AND THEN MAKE HER HAVE REFLECTIVE SHIT THATS NOT A CAMERA LENS

another another: "you are concerned that i would hold a grudge against you simply because you are a daughter of athena?" that. is what happens in the books yes. you hold a grudge against annabeth and you try and manipulate/groom percy bc you loved poseidon

grover was the only one not enticed by aunty em's magic/mist/food, which was odd, bc hes eaten most everything before and hinted that something was off. bc yknow in the books they DIDNT KNOW IT WAS MEDUSA TIL THEY ALMOST DIED

why was there a bell on her home door. why is her home next to her store

sally empathizing with medusa? fine. her not telling percy all of the different myth versions? not fine.

"i think we can trust her" is literally medusa

have i mentioned the poor travelling orphan circus bc i miss that

GROVER SHOULDNT CARE ABOUT HAMBURGER SMELL??? HES VEGETARIAN???

oh right zeus just not striking down the two vehicles. makes sense, he doesnt have his bolt for a precision strike, but come on

was this where we got "names have power"? i dont remember if its here or not at all. especially since they continue to say names. and yes this was in the book i know its both funny and smack-my-head-against-the-wall worthy throughout the series

copy paste: "youre not the frightened little girl i came for all those years ago" yeah you didnt go for annabeth. you went for thalia. you got what you wanted (maybe not entirely but whatever). the fuck are you ON about alecto

annabeth not knowing how to function in a gas station was good and funny and sad

carrying the shoes in the box btw? terrible. shouldve immediately given them to grover before leaving camp. or. better yet. luke shouldve had witnesses for giving the shoes to percy so it wouldve been immediate

FORGOT ARGUS WASNT IN THIS. DISAPPOINTED

copy paste: "do exactly as i say" im not sure i like how theyre trying to portray the bossiness of annabeth. its different but its still the same level of bossiness. "are we clear?" honey you havent been outside camp since you were SEVEN. youre TWELVE. get OVER YOURSELF

"she met a pinecone's fate" was fucking hilarious and i will not hear otherwise

annabeth saying goodbye to thalia is fantastic

"i thought about choosing you before i chose grover" I HATE THE CHANGES THEY DID TO GETTING THE QUEST. percy chooses grover IMMEDIATELY and is all "oh jee willikers i wonder who would be stupid enough to volunteer for this surely deadly quest" and annabeth rips her hat off and half forces herself on the quest (she was pushy but percy did agree so. half.). there wasnt the 'telling the entire head of cabins' there wasnt 'debating on luke' THERE WASNT ANY OF THAT SHIT

poor canada. that shade is meant to be next season with the cannibals and oh wait theres probably not gonna be cannibals bc "kids show". right. chuck e cheese was a good fuckin joke tho

chiron isnt that straight forward that he suspects hades and that the entrance to the underworld is in la. small thing but D: hes a teacher he should still have the 'lead the kids to the answer' instinct

now for eps 1 & 2 i didnt make live notes, i did it hours after watching them, so ill definitely miss shit

no myth to make zeus thinking poseidon would genuinely want to unseat him actually make sense

no storm getting past the barrier, no campers reaction to that, no calling zeus crazy

NO DOLPHIN THREAT D:

i hated that there was nothing between his claiming and the quest. wheres the alienating. wheres the dislike. wheres the new expectations & disgust & fear. WHERES THAT DAMN NEWSPAPER

also hated how there was NO HELLHOUND

no nemesis foreshadowing (ik rick got her wrong at first, saying she was a god n not a goddess, and it might not have been intentional but ethan nakamura sure was important)

no talking about zeus, hera, artemis, & hades cabins??? for some reason???

no balanced sword talk

NO BLUE CHERRY COKE WHAT THE FUCK

no monsters stoked in the woods, no harpies, no naiads, no "Not a single living thing."

no talk about how monsters revive, no talk of the move west, no mention of chiron age & still being needed as a teacher of heroes. also NO STELE. WHYYYYY

there was no pull to poseidon's cabin

THERE WAS NO HESTIA. IM SO PISSED

why did grover have to TELL percy that his mom might still be alive. percy IMMEDIATELY thinks that when he gets the idea that maybe this greek shit is real. or, at least, he thinks he can get her back

the hermes cabin was not NEARLY crowded enough. its meant to be FILLED. its meant to be BARELY ANY WALKING SPACE. not. like. maybe three kids on the floor. plus no laughter at percy asking when hes gonna get claimed

no mention of the romans???

percy didnt really??? go through a denial phase in the show??? for some reason???

personal opinion: i couldnt even get through the dionysus talk btw. too awkward. i skimmed the subtitles & didnt have my headphones on

the only mention of capital G god & the metaphysical & the Gods was when percy thought he was the second coming of christ. that was funny ill give you that. however. wheres the overwhelming lore dump

was there? a science talk? i dont think there was. whyy

for some reason they didnt get into mr d's restriction all that much

BARELY ANY GROVER FEARING MR D. NO MR D & SATYR CONNECTION

no ambrosia no nectar no grover bleating

theres been no cursing in greek or latin so far btw. why. i feel like you could ask plenty of people for a good translation, if the ogs sucked. and im sure the kids could get a good enough score from people who speak greek/ancient greek and latin

there was no memory of poseidon seeing percy as a baby???

no nature magic thing with percy replicating the thing grover did on the bus at gabe and having the door slam him. maybe bc rick didnt think that made much sense since its never shown again but that was Funny

gabe seems less like an abusive drunkard and more like a dirty loser (yes ik he restricts/feels entitled to all comunication & financial whatnot & that is abuse but so far (AS OF EPISODE SEVEN (7)) he doesnt deserve to get turned to stone for that)

ive basically already mentioned everything else previous except: percy vaporizing alecto bc anaklusmos just so happened to be opening in a way where alecto was in the way? and that made her die? wheres the instinct??? i dont care if percy's visibly shit at swinging that sword, there shouldve been the instinct to get up and swing

lastly: anaklusmos shouldve been given back after alecto & returned before quest. using her during the minotaur was useless and, again, didnt show the power boost percy gets from all water (rain)

now on the names topic: im not saying br-oo-ner. its spelt brun-er, i say brun-er. they also say th-augh-lee-ah. i will still say th-AH-lee-ah

i will just reiterate this is for fun. this is fun for me and if youve read all of this then it should be fun for you, too, to complain/discuss this. if its not and youre genuinely pissed off with my observations: i do not care. barely anything you say will change my opinions/observations, and if youre aggressive im immediately throwing your opinion away. this is fun for me. this is how i have fun. this is a saltwater fountain to those that also have fun discussin/breaking shit apart. if you dont find it fun, then go enjoy your olive branch away from here

to anyone that also has fun with this: tear my observations apart. tell me everything that i got wrong bc i only read some books years ago. dont worry about spoiling me. i dont care about spoilers. i prefer all the info upfront instead of gatekept behind "but itll ruin your experience when you read it for the first time!!!!" i spoiled myself about who nico's dad was when i was on sea of monsters okay im fine. i know jason's circumstances in trials of apollo. i might not know everything that happened in house of hades (or anything about trials and later) but that shouldnt stop you.

ill state again: i like the show. the show's alright. im not sure id call it good because ive read the books & i do prefer book lightning thief to the show. but i like it and am hoping it gets more seasons. i hope we at least finish last olympian, but i would like to see hoo get adapted.

some of these are complaining for the sake of it (down to a grain of sand), some of these are actual criticisms about the adaptation (the removal of the foreshadowing that was in the books & abscense of groundworks for later books & hoo (yes i saw the kids with purple shirts in the lotus scene thats not enough)), some mightve been criticisms of it as a show (plenty of people have mentioned that the pacing is bad, i didnt want to focus on it). it's all in good fun

i do have a thought though: This could've easily been a rewritten book. In fact, it would've been far better as a rewritten, first-person limited book. I think it would've taken less time (able to just write your vision and not have barely any stage directions as your only descriptors & run it by writers, directors, actors, etc.), less money (12-15 MILLION usd per EPISODE??? compared to a writing program & looking for someone to publish it???), and would've taken less time (writing, waiting for approval, casting, booking, filming, post production, waiting, uploading, waiting for renewal, repeat. compared to writing at your own speed & publishing whenever (possibly even waiting until enough books are done?)). My reading fanfic more than traditional books/watching shows/movies definitely affects my opinion, I will readily admit that. But I think my own imagination of the happenings in the book would've been fine. Would there be new fans? Probably not as many. Would old fans come back? Again, probably not as many. Would it have been better? I think so.

TLDR: there were more neutral changes than good ones, a lot weren't good (comparatively), some were funny, some got rid of the funny, this is fun for me and if it wasn't for you then L. die madge. i want to hear other's opinions though. and i think this show should've been a rewritten first-person book and not a tv show.

#pjo spoilers #pjo #percy jackson #pjo show #pjo tv show #percy jackson and the olympians #long post #cant wait to either get people disagreeing bc they think im a book purist or no one looking at this #vwoopis posts

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