#do i use this picture every time i’m trying to manifest something? yes.

[c0mbatchameleon]

hi anna my love would you mind telling us what the possession au is about 🥺🤲🏼💗

LUNEEE ABSOLUTELY ABSOFRUITLY I CAN.

Ok so the tldr here is James is a demon that possesses reg. This all came from a drunk 3am note in my phone about the “intimacy of literally inhabiting the same body, to become a singular noun; my thoughts are yours now, you don’t even know where you end and I begin, your soul would feel so empty without me here to fill in all the gaps” etc etc. Right ok. Long ramblings below, be warned.

So picture regulus, our resident high-strung control freak who has lived as a puppet on a string at the whims of his family ever since he was a teenager and they began staging him to join / eventually take over their major capitalist conglomerate empire or whatever. Iffy on the details still but there’s a lot of politics involved. Think like the richest of the rich in the world and they want to keep their family on the top—regulus is their vessel to do so.

And the thing is, he goes above and beyond. He gave up on trying to escape the life he’s been (to him) imprisoned in a long time ago, and his (perceived) lack of control and agency has only driven him to climb higher, hungry for even more disgusting amounts of wealth and power, fuck everyone else, he wants to be at the fucking top, and maybe then he’ll be free. He’s terrible and he’s miserable and he’s everything they wanted him to be, he feels like a slave to time and to the life that was carved out for him, and it manifests in him exerting extreme amounts of control over the one thing he can have some semblance of control over, which is his own body.

(slight tw for disordered / obsessive eating / body habits?)

Picture him scheduling his days down to the minute. He wakes up at 5:30am everyday after getting the exact amount of sleep to complete five rem cycles, he has a strict workout regimen every day perfectly planned out for the week, meals all the same mapped out down to the calorie. You’d think he’s in the army. His skincare routine puts patrick bateman to shame. He jerks off once a week cuz he thinks it has health benefits or keeps him sharp or something (if you’ve watched The End of the Fucking World I’m pretty sure this is where my brain subconsciously picked this from) and it’s mechanical and he’s dead in the eyes and he knows it will take him exactly 5 minutes and 8 seconds to come.

And then. Suddenly. He’s having weird dreams about some man he doesn’t know and they’re making him feel things when he has specifically trained his body to NOT feel things and what’s happening to him? And then dreams become daydreams. And then he’s losing time. HES LOSING TIME. Which is literally his worst nightmare. It’s making him fuckinf spiral, his routines are being thrown off, the small semblance of control is slipping, so he’s already at his wits fucking end when a goddamn voice in his head starts talking to him. Like that’ll do it.

But then the voice, the man, the figure from his dreams, James, is telling him to relax. Telling him you’re so wound up. I can feel it, you know? How tired you are. It’s okay baby, let me take the reins for the day. You just have to sit back up in that head of yours—of ours—and let it all turn to static for a bit. Don’t worry. I’ll give you your body back tonight. Don’t you trust me? Wouldn’t it feel good to just.. let go for a bit?

And eventually regulus discovers that it DOES feel good. He fucking loves it. He gives up control willingly for the first time, he lets James do it all for him, to move him around like a puppet in the most literal sense but it’s different from his family, from everyone else. It’s freeing.

and it’s like this weird corruption-anticorruption thing because yes james is influencing him and planting thoughts in his head and literally taking over his body at points but it’s all to make him do…kinda good things? “Fuck the company, don’t show up today, let’s go to the coast like you used to as a kid,” “don’t pick up the phone, I know you’ve never declined your mother’s call before, but just try. Don’t you feel powerful?” Until eventually reg is sabotaging the company, his family, he’s basically suicide-bombing the stock market, he’s giving all his money away, etc etc. he’s more free than he’s ever felt in his life and to the outside world he looks absolutely insane and, shit, maybe he is, but it feels fucking amazing.

I just love the thought of James’ more mundane influence on him too. He’s craving hot Cheetos for the first time in his life and absolutely appalled and confused and James is like “shit my bad I was thinking abt them.” James has him smoke weed for the first time (the scene I have planned for this……) and he has to take over to roll the joint for him. Why the fuck is reg enjoying abba music? But also—why the fuck is a demon enjoying abba music?

I’ve rambled way too much so I’ll reign it in there. Lots of details subject to change, but this is basically all I’m thinking abt these days.

#lovely lovely lune thank you for indulging me #I fear this response got away from me. forgive me—I’ve been possessed once again #fic / possession au #lune tag #mail #jegulus #jegulus fic #regulus black #james potter

[solselah]

(18+ Warning)

🌸•🌸

PILE 1 :

They are so turned on by you protecting the relationship like they feel so prideful and proud that you really are into this relationship like you say you are , they know it but you confirm it when someone wants to hit on you or get with you , like immediately you directly check that person and for your person that is so attractive it’s like you are willing to step up and Protect the vibe yall have going with each other ! It drives them crazy the feeling you give them, especially when relating to wanting a family like they WANT to impregnate you ASAP /STAT (lol you could be in the medical field)!! Your sex is so Special and sacred for them like the way you Snap into this goddess energy when you’re ready to fuck is astronomically attractive to them ! It’s like during the day your cool , chill , maybe you wear a uniform to work so you’re usually just in that , but when they see you in this other light it just makes them go rabid !! They also love how you blocked out your ex for them , they feel it proved your loyalty to them !

CHANNELED MESSAGE:

Your body just does something for me !! The things I fantasize about doing with you , girl you can’t even imagine , the next time I see you , just please let me hold you ! Fall into me, melt into me allow me to consume you the best way , you know I know HOW! This Love we have is something I’m sure you haven’t felt from anyone else. The way I Conduct four play with you is so natural and emotional ! I remember making you emotional while I was in it , I remember you making me feel amazing about pleasing you & with that alone I can go forever !! I want you to carry my seed. I want to intertwine with your whole existence! Don’t be shy with me next time I want all of you . Don’t hold back , I wouldn’t know what to do if you did.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

PILE 2:

Okay so off bat I’m getting your HOT , you’re just ATTRACTIVE like you don’t even know what to say for that it’s just YOU! This person is driven crazy by your eyes ! Like your look is so specific they quite literally see that part of you almost evertime they think/ picture your face (For my ladies) They love your ability to take D*** 🍆 , like they feel you are A trophy something to show off and you actually aren’t completely against this , it could be a soft kink for you both , to keep things spiced up and I’ll tell you this now , it drives them MAD. You guys could roleplay often , I’m getting 70s / 80s vibes so this could be the era you tap into while role playing or even the look you give off very mature and alluring !! They actually love when you guys Role play and really get into characters where you both are oblivious to who you are. It’s like you are strangers and get together randomly and it turns them on ! What drives them crazy is that you get WETT !! Like DRENCHED. They have never seen anything like it with anyone they’ve been with , definitely not as much ! It’s like you save this 🐱 just for them !! And vise versa 🍆 “it’s all yours”.

Channeled song : Bad habits ed Sheeran

CHANNELED MESSAGE:

You already know with me , I want you all the time ! Don’t even bother asking if I’m home ? If I’m busy !? I always have time for you and if not I’ll try my best to make that time ! Your body , your energy is always worth mine. I literally ask my therapist about how to approach you with this new thing I want to do with us. I just want to make sure you’re into this! You matter to me and I wouldn’t want to put you in position to feel like you don’t ! You just turn me on when you’re in your authoritative energy I can’t help but say YES SIR / YES MAM. When we aren’t around each other I manifest you , like heavy !! I hate we go through our ups and downs but , I can’t help but want you , like whether we are apart or always together ! Don’t doubt my intentions or feelings for you I would never doubt us. You may hate me at times but I want to always prove to you I’m here for you & want every aspect of you. don’t forget our secrets babe , you don’t sext me anymore , I used to love when you were at work texting me and turning me on making me Want to jump through the literal phone ! I love you 🥹

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

PILE 3:

They honestly love the pull back you do to them haha they feel frustrated but so turned on at the same time ! To them it’s the perfect mix of emotions !! It actually sometimes triggers them & you personally are attracted yourself to seeing them squirm to get to touch your body! For some you really make them work to touch the 🐱 !! You make them work to put it in haha it’s like “ahhhh gotta be quicker than that” vibes ! Sometimes they just want to softly choke you & hold you down so you can just take what they put down ! But they know already when it happens there’s no tapping out with them ! Haha they also are so crazily attracted when you surrender to them , whether that’s with actual fucking or them just going down on you lol no shade but you’ll tap out sometimes lol its alotttt / hot + sweaty. Btw you don’t even need too much to feel good with this person. It’s just crazy because I’m wanting to pick up on their energy but they are turning it back to you consistently so you really do it for them , you Put the icing on the cake for this person. pile 3 !! Like they can just explode 💦💦 looking at you ! You can really control the bedroom and you could totally be a sub when you want ! You make them thirstyyyyy! Like they go crazy eyes for you 🌻 , they really do value this relationship though! Your personal dynamic in the bedroom really turns them on !!!

Lucky daye - Floods

CHANNELED MESSAGE :

Why does everything have to be up to you ? I want to Play my role , play my part , I feel sometimes you restrict me from feeling free & I just haven’t been able to put my hands on how to resolve this ! It never disrupts us in bed but it has me thinking after we fuck sometimes what’s going on my love ? if I am doing something wrong or need to do something more please tell me ! I want us to get back to our hot moments. Like I miss having your videos sent to me so I can get off when you’re not physically around ! I could save you from whatever you’re going through or at least I can try … but you have to tell me.

Please let me know what’s up?

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

PILE 4:

They are so crazy about your spicy side like your mouth is LETHALL! Both sexually and verbally ! You can fuck someone upp with your words , like full blown

*turn around* “stop talking to me vibes”. I don’t know why I’m getting NY vibes , East coast living ! You’re so straight to the point it’s in you not on YOU and that fucking turns them way tf on !! It’s like they have a personal motivator & shit talker in one ! It’s beautiful. They truly love you for alot more than your sex but boy does it turn them on the things you are capable of doing with your mouth , That one body part does and says enough alone ! Like you go down on this person so GOOD , So WELL! 👏🏽👏🏽! Like your past professional ! They question if you were taught step by step by your exes or something .Basically you’re too good kind of suspiciously good! If you’re with a man like they get off so quickly it’s wild. you also Turn yourself on , you could masturbate and they Are turned on by that , they are content that you can channel self love through touching yourself , you get that faucet going real quick ! I’m seeing imagery of you pushing their head away or back like your 🐱/🍆 gets so sensitive !! They putss shit down & you return the same damn energy ! You both know how to bring the toxicity in the bedroom and shit gets reckless and can go on for so long !! You guys could literally fuck or give head anywhere that seems to be private enough for y’all ! Loud and all. They don’t even care , with you all bets are up .. they will “tackle” you for what they want in the bedroom Meaning what you have for them they know it’s theirs ! But y’all can be so toxic at times man , it’s apart of the fire in the relationship but it could definitely be an issue. Like a real one 😩

(Y’all could be interested in bringing a 3rd into the dynamic )

Turbo x Gunna - BACHELOR

CHANNELED MESSAGE :

Yo all this back and fourth with you Is crazy , I do try to respect you for what it is but you go way off the rails for me. One minute you say this the next it’s a different thing , like how am I supposed to trust you and your judgments with other people. Like don’t be giving away my 🐱/🍆 don’t just be passing that around. Whatever people tell me I dust it off , but I’m starting to wonder… I want all the energy stop sharing my 🐱/🍆 and whoever feels like they can challenge me in that , They have another thing coming. I’ll go to bat for you & you’ll really only know if I show you !

(So toxic , I can’t even express.) I’m kind of shocked myself 🙈

“I can’t see I’m blind “

SZA - BLIND

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Hope you enjoy ✨

IG: @SOLECCENTRIC

#pick a picture #spirituality #love #pick a card #pac reading #tarotdaily #tarot reading #connection #culture #pick a pile #18+ tarot reading #18+ pick a card #universal #pick a photo #celestial #tarotcommunity #truth #channeled message

[yermes]

Im not going to lie step kiddos; I’ve been feeling really sad an inadequate as of late. But instead of being angry and upset we’re going to sit down and work it out together

Heres some bread I baked (:

Pick a picture (srry no meme today)

Pick a card

Power 🧠:

Four of disks, Chesed through earth,

The hard work of three has paid off now bitch its imposter syndrome time. While having stability and having the fruits of your labor something about it seems almost untrustworthy. You may have a fear of loss, or perhaps a greed for more depending on the struggle to get here. While you finally achieve stability do not over estimate it or underestimate yourself you do deserve good things.

Princess of Cups 🐢🪽:

Venus in water signs, Earth in the waters of Briah, Malkuth

You are on an island surrounded by water around you. You may be missing research, depth, or wisdom at the moment but you do have a moment of emotional freedom. Secluded and alone you can feel out your emotions however you can also sink into the emotions and give into day dreaming which is where you can feel inadequate to dreams you may be incapable of achieving atm.

Prince of swords 🦚 ⚔️:

21° Cap to 20° Aqu, Airs of Yetzirah, Tiphareth

OKAY so the air aspect of air: at best you’re pure manifestation and a plethora of creative thoughts at your worst you can be confusing and argumentative. Without any of the other elements its like hermes story of using his intelligence to cheat and lie through life. You need to get out of your head. Use your creativity but stop being mean to yourself. Utilize the other elements to manifest while also try and do something which will chase them mean voices away (I feel you girl its not easy :(

Story:

You know I’ve been all over the internet and I’m on tiktok because spending a humiliating amount of time looking at food online is my only hobby. But as of late witchtok took me back into its clutches. Now I don’t consider myself a witch: im a chaos magician but to each their own with their titles. The shocking combination of “tinned fishtok” aka rich people trying to appropriate and raise the value of my beloved canned fish. Along with the constant argument between practitioners of morals or karma or what have you. But I am about to end this whole debate. Yes; an no. Listen we live in a world where nothing is real yet everything is real at the same time. Our paradigms are shaped differently and are unique based upon our lives and experiences. Everyones moral code will be different. No you probably won’t change anyones mind by yelling at them on the internet. The other thing to look at is not every intention is going to be 100% good all the time and not every intention can be 100% bad. The words themselves good and bad are also subjective. While I think it’s admirable that some practitioners want to dedicate themselves to the “good” theres more than good out there. And what happens if your suppressed “bad” feelings come out in a negative way? So here it is; nothing is real and everything is real all at once. Thats why so many people who you would think would have similar practices have very different ones because the way magic looks and manifests to them depends on their reality which is different from their peers or yours. Anyways thats my rant I hope you come around for a rant/story/ reading another time I love that so many of you like my readings. (:

#suitlifeofgerm #askgerm #pick a card #daily card #pick a picture #mental health #sorry no memes im not feeling funny or joking today #i hope I brighten your day a bit though (:

[toinfinitywinning]

Moments and massive revelations —the really special realm of Hell.

Stubbornness. Pain. Lament. Jealousy. No Confidence but w/ a good selfie smile b/c ur Dog can’t take pictures, & no stick b/c u Def picked the wrong one or something. I say similar thoughts a lot…and w/ teardrops on my guitar …so I’m paying close attention. This stuff is dangersome.

Okay. I’ll just make a list.

Growth and learning during:

- humility. throw your Pride out the Door-you will need help.

- regardless of the wrong’s you righted before getting sick. They’re still achievements, but they’re not realized. So then you think was it worth it? Yes, but is it too much to ask to bask in it for just a bit? I mean I am talking multiple, major Life changes. Ha—here’s COVID-19. After that you better be in for the Long-Haul too ‘cuz…

- appreciation for the very minute of things we do in a Day. Getting the mail is difficult for me. Brushing my teeth —out of breath so have to incorporate breaks to breathe Right.

- there are more people Who care about you than you ever knew. It’s not just b/c you’re going through this, people just may be more Vocal. Makes complete sense but took me a bit to get there.

- you will want to throw something, scream into a pillow, drown in self pity —some of which you think you don’t deserve or are allowed. Do it anyway. Safely.

- some days u just gotta laugh. I mean fr b/c u can’t even cry. And things R absurd LOL

- regardless of your spiritual Life or beliefs. You’re gonna be angry at the God or State of mind supposed to save you and take it all away. Then realize that’s not at all the point. We’re not puppets. Think of how dull Life would be w/o the ecstasy from an achievement or how mundane if we didn’t have anything to have Faith in or Hope for or Love or forgive. That’s why we’re not born in Heaven maybe. We have to try first. I don’t want to be a Lazarus. I wanna fight. And we may never know an answer or reason to any of it. That’s gonna take a lifetime to settle b/c there is no rationality to be had.

- I do not mean this to pettifog. You actually do find out Who comes through for you. That old country song line.

- it’s possible to have a Good Day even full of Pain and Discomfort but u kinda have to make yourself and accept its potential consequence for participating.

- the little things aren’t little anymore. You envy people Who can do normal things. Things you used to do without a problem in the world.

- I’ve had to do a lot of fixing in my Life. This may not be perfectly fixed. We don’t have a Choice but to either live with it as a strength and inspiration or stay negative and pouty about what once was. Even tho you have every reason to.

- you will learn so much about yourself. So much. And most things I’ve learned have been new revelations. May have always been there but there to manifest as needed. It’s not all great but I’m not the same person just a few more grayish hairs.

- you will experience numbness. You can sit with it & pull your compression socks down for a bit, b/c this is something no one deserves. You just can’t live there.

- patience. You will never have to try harder. Hyper, hyper sensitivity.

- a journey to healing IF ever realized will be the hardest job you’ve ever had to do. More overtime than you can be paid. And u didn’t even interview. In a material result and no result world it’s disconcerting not to “get anything back”

- you’ll think back about previous hard times. How in that moment life was the worst it could ever be. How much time do u have lol. Next bad thing, ugh so much harder. And while all of this is very true, and all real, i will tell you that to know true strength is to come into any light possible while wielding off not just the physical, but all the emotions of the rainbow and mind. This even is a choice. People complimented you about your strength and are inspired by your determination to think u can. Girl were we wrong...you can make all the “Right” choices and healthy habits and still get punked over and over by Kevin McCalister. When I appreciate people now I try to take their “all” of them. Who are they in that moment. It is a different Life. And anyone else’s journey? Maybe I’ll be lucky enough to witness triumph b/c of how many obstacles went unseen. Yet they made it.

- the only person allowed to say “it could be worse” is you. Period. To be otherwise feels a bit like a competition. We, going through it, already know that. I have the same complaint when it feels like some people or orgs compete for who’s ‘wokest’? B/c if that’s why we’re / I’m doing how disingenuous.

- when words/phrases like holiday or vacation or lets Go out give you more Anxiety and worsen your Physical Health—that’s when you know your Life has done a 180. Especially if those were the times you lived for. This hard Truth and reality is one of the hardest for me. I already had Anxiety about unpacking after vacation before I packed in the first place but whether or not waiting until you really have to Go to the bathroom so u can (while you’re up) also get some water is just something I would have thought before as one of the dumbest things I’d ever heard. And how cruel is that knowing what I know and feel now.

- Life is not a give and take like we want it to be. If that were the Case I’m not positive we’d ever know what healing or getting better really means. Not only that—you may give more than any other, and nothing. You may see the best doctors and access to all the Meds and tests put forward. Nothing. Pretty soon things are hollow and harrowing. Kind of like the celebrities Who swear that money does not make you happy. It’s like a bandaid that doesn’t stay on in the shower, the ones at Doc offices u get after shots. With mickey on them.

- I think joy is like a preventative medicine. When you practice taking it, You save it up and changes you. Like any of my tattoos, there’s gotta be a story there or something meaningful even if your answer starts off, “well spring break senior year we were…’ you get it. Hangover 1-3 movies. HappYness fleets around. More drug like. Addictive really. Impulsive. Every big chain company’s biggest threat if they can get us hooked. You just got swindled. Ha and to Go a bit more political—people know this scheme is pyramid like and use sneaky ways to have Power over you. Goodness I’m not trying to make this sound like a happy cult but there’s just Def a difference.

- you are exhausted mind body and Soul and regardless of consequence you have to choose some times to be present b/c for me I don’t want to Miss out on vacations and holiday’s. But it is an hourly debate. But I can’t just sit there every significant interaction.

- you’re tired. You’ve been strong, resilient, ppl tell you and u appreciate it. But I get tired of having to stay strong. It’s just so overwhelming and for me especially b/c “I can do it alone.” I’ve failed at that a few times.

- you’ll notice things you never have before. Suddenly they mean something like whether u can drive to get Food.

- being a bit redundant but part of stewardship on my End is allowing the help. Someone WANTS to do something for you for THEIR spiritual needs. Not in a vain type of Way. Let them. We’ve all been on the other side.

- you will experience a full range of emotions. Address them separately. Ppl still might look up to you.

- you’ll wanna give up. Don’t. Maybe your continuing going on is the stewardship someone recognizes in themselves. Idk. Pay it forward?

- lastly. YOU don’t KNOW everything. Karma could very well be your best friend, but that line of thinking is non productive and will only take u so far before you’re complaining re something else. B/c regardless of what I’ve done, —and given its timing you learn a karma hostage relationship is something easier holding on to than facing it. Just deflect.

That’s okay. When ready move on to the New Testament. I’m not fully there. But, I have to think the puppet analogy doesn’t apply here too. Shit happens. Ask that dude running with Forrest with a tshirt company dream that died and some dog shizz. Just control what you can. Easier said than done. Thats why when we do overcome—it means more. It’s engrained. Forever inevitable if you can continue to separate the wheat from the chaff. Card Game of Bullshit.

- ppl at some point think you’re being dramatic and begging for attention as if any more attention is what would heal us

- comments like you look Good or sound fine fall deaf. Well So do ppl Right before they kill themselves. Anymore how u look doesn’t have Shit of a correlation

- you’ll get on ppl’s nerves

- you’ll be resented and questioned how sick u really are. Trust me faking —that’s the last Fucking thing on our minds.

- I don’t need to explain anything

[lyssalis-corner]

A Quick(ish) Note on SPD

For anyone wondering what it’s like to live with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), I recommend watching Man of Steel. Yes, a Superman Movie. Because quite frankly, aside from the whole alien-with-X-ray-vision-who-can-shoot-lasers-from-his-eyes thing, child Clark Kent is a great representation. Of me, at least. First, some facts.

There are two main kinds of SPD -- Hypo- (meaning you don’t get enough sensory input) and Hyper- (meaning you get too much sensory input). I’m Hyper-Sensory. So is Superman.

Sensory Processing Disorder often comes hand-in-hand with other “mental disabilities” / “learning disorders”, like Autism, ADHD, and ADD. It’s also called “Sensory Sensitivity” sometimes. What all of this means is basically this; in my brain the pathways that handle sensory stimulus are formed differently. My favorite description I read somewhere in the depths of the internet; It’s like everyone else is born with a kind of “mental secretary” who deals with all of the input in their brain. This “secretary” is capable of filtering stimulus in to ‘relevant’ and ‘irrelevant’ and only sends the things deemed ‘relevant’ out for further analysis. I don’t have one. What this means is whenever I am exposed to stimuli my brain registers it all as ‘relevant’-must-be-dealt-with-immediately. And I have to wade through this unending sea of sights, sounds, smells, and textures, on my own. All at once. My brain doesn’t know how to filter out background noises, purposeless smells, or pointless textures (like how, right now, I can feel what feels like every individual thread in my socks). In order for my brain to filter something out, I have to be exposed to it almost continually for about a month, and make the choice of “no, this is not relevant. I can ignore it.” continually to make a setting in my brain.

So, where does Man of Steel  factor into all of this? Great question! And the answer lies in the movies use of flashbacks as a story telling device. And also in Zod’s downfall.

Here’s a link to the school room scene on YouTube (first time trying to add a link, let me know if you can’t use it). Also a quick search on “man of steel school room scene” should bring it up.

The school room scene does such a good job at showing a sensory overload, it literally sent me into one. I had to pull out all of my coping mechanisms to watch this whole movie because this was such a prevalent theme.

First let’s deal with The Noise. This is, quite honestly, the main manifestation of my SPD. And this scene does a great job showing what going into a Sensory Overload is like. You can hear everything, the clock is ticking, there’s a bell ringing somewhere, there’s chalk scratching on the chalk board, everyone’s breathing, the teacher’s talking. But you can’t quite focus on any of it. It’s all happening at once, and the only thing you can do to get rid of it? Covering your ears. Except, that doesn’t work. It’s only muffled now, which in my experience, can actually be worse. Also, for me, all electric devices have a noise they make just by being on. The lights? The fridge? The dishwasher? The TV? It’s like my ears are always ringing.

Second, there’s the Visual Input.  Here, it’s portrayed by use of his X-ray vision. For me, it’s usually Colors and Numbers. Here’s another about me, I have Dyscalculia, which is like Dyslexia, but with numbers instead of letters and words. Numbers send my brain into freak-out mode. Colors, in my experience, are the king of overstimulating visual input. And that class room is full of them. Clothes, pictures on the wall, classroom decorations.

Third, there’s the two that can’t really be demonstrated through film, Smell and Touch. I don’t know what Superman’s powers are related to these (those who do, please educate me, I’d love to know), but I can extrapolate. For me touch is stuff like; my clothes, whatever I’m sitting on, anything touching any patch of skin or putting pressure on my body. This is why I tend to dress extremely modestly, covering as much skin as I can, so I can control the sort of input I’m getting. Smell is... Pretty much everything has a smell to it. Leather, people, food, books, electronics that are on? All have a smell. It’s everywhere.

Superman had to learn an incredible amount of self-discipline and control in order to prevent these sorts of freak-outs. It’s mentally and physically draining, to have to monitor it all. These principles are demonstrated exceptionally well when he breaks Zod’s helmet. And Zod, who has amazing discipline of a kind, is exposed to all of this input. That scene? Was physically painful for me to watch (which actually has to due to sensitive hearing, which only compounds the SPD), due to all the high-pitched noises.

Now in conclusion, a word on coping mechanisms, and diversity. First, my experience is not everyone’s experience. If you have a friend or relative with SPD, you should talk and (more importantly) listen to them about their own experiences. Second, everyone has different coping mechanisms, (represented in the film by the imaginary island) and here are mine;

A pair of good, Bluetooth, earbuds. This deals with audio stimulus, I have a pair of Tozo T-10s (purchased on Amazon). They are wireless, stemless, and compatible with most Bluetooth capable devices. And, as far as wireless earbuds go, are good value for money. I use these to play music I like, loudly, and block out all other audio stimulus. They are always on my person, and always charged.

A hat, eye mask, or other blindfold-like thing. This blocks out Visual stimulus. And is pretty helpful. You can just close your eyes, but a lot of light still gets in. The idea here is to block out as much as possible until the stuff in your head reaches more reasonable levels and you can deal with all of it.

If a smell is too bad, I try and remove myself from the situation. There isn’t much I’ve found to do about smells and textures. I do deliberately avoid textures I know have a negative effect on me, like sandpaper, itchy socks (read; most socks), and a lot of bras. (sometime I’ll make a post about my adventures in corsetry)

Most times, the earbuds are enough. Sometimes they’re not. I also have a Google Doc typed up on my phone for when I go out places by myself, explaining stuff like who I am, and what’s happening if I go into an Overload. Which can be debilitating and impossible to function in. I try to avoid places I know have to much sensory stimulus for me like Large Events, services at mega churches, and large arcades. Shopping at places like Old Navy and Costco are hard, as they are loud, echo-y structures and in them it feels like I can hear everything.

Maybe this helps you, maybe it helps a friend. Maybe it’s just an interesting insight into a movie. Whatever this is to you, I’d love to hear it! Message me/comment/whatever, if you have any questions, or need someone to listen to your struggles.

#sensory processing disorder #man of steel #superman #movie thoughts

[adhdwtf]

loki finale guys soon okay everybody pray with me that there’s no sylki kiss

#do i use this picture every time i’m trying to manifest something? yes. #does it ever work? ... no #anti sylki #loki #loki series #lokius #i feel like the only way they’ll kiss is if it’s followed by one of them betraying the other #antisylki

[sukirichi]

Imagine Naoya coming home a little bruised and is staggering. Forgetting etiquette and manners, you run towards him and helps him then POOF, Naoya turns into a child.

Getting Shoko to check him up and cue to Gojo laughing his ass off at Naoya's state to which you were a little irritated—no, you were ready to break Gojo's legs if it weren't for his infinity.

Maybe an hour later or the next day, little Naoya wakes up. To your surprise, he's so cute and innocent, staring at you with wide eyes, looking so lost.

crying. yes my heart is soft, i am in love. thank you so much for this, i really loved writing it and writing naoya always comforts me. thank you for making my day 💕

# soft naoya hours

# part of the trophy wife collection 

Three hours. That’s how much time has passed since Naoya promised he’d come home. It had been three dreadful hours, and your husband still wasn’t home.

The servants have grown weary of watching you pace back and forth, your perfectly manicured nails chipped down from nibbling on it too much. He’ll be fine, they reassured, it’s Naoya-sama, he’ll come home safely. It’s not that you didn’t trust in his abilities – hell, you experienced his skills in speed and strength firsthand way too many times in bed before to know he’ll come out mostly unscathed – but he promised he’d be home three hours ago, and your husband never broke his promises.

Naoya himself knew better than not to keep his word. With you as his wife, he’s not worried you’ll nag or give him the cold shoulder should he come late since you’re perfectly content being submissive and meek, but the way you worry for him.

You always fret so much for him – not because he’s not capable of taking care of himself – but because you can’t handle the thought of losing him that if anything happens to him, you’ll quickly get rid of your trophy wife title in the blink of an eye and release the powers you’ve kept dormant since your marriage. Safe to say, you’re always so worried for him that he feels bad about it. It would’ve been better if you screamed at him at least once, but you’re too quiet, too gentle, that your perturbation manifests in anxious glances, endless pouting, and cold, trembling hands that he doesn’t have it in himself to make you worry any further.

But if such was the case, where was he?

The storm is unforgiving outside. Thunder erupts and claps even at the sturdy roofs of the Zen’in Estate, the lights blinking every now and then with each roar that wouldn’t simmer down to pit-pattering murmurs. Every now and then, lightning would illuminate the gardens outside, and still, not a sight of Naoya.

A few minutes later, just when you’re quite sure you’ve dug deep into the floorings from your endless pacing, your husband appears.

Bruises littered his face and neck, staggering forwards as he clutches his bicep. His feline eyes run across the room for a moment, the servants shock still upon seeing their master heavily wounded – and then there’s you.

He feels you before he sees you. Setting aside all etiquettes and manners drilled into your head that is becoming of the clan head’s wife, you lunge yourself into his arms. His pained groans and whimpers are heard, verbal protests absent. Softly, Naoya buries his cut cheeks into the crook of your neck as you quite literally lose it and cry as you pull him closer, almost muted whispers sorry I’m late disappearing into your silken robes.

You shake your head and fret over him once more, gesturing to the servants to get him a towel, call the healers and just do something. At your sudden commands, the servants come back to life and rush in all directions. Naoya begins to breathe heavily the further he weakens and you try to steady him, his eyes drooping close when – POOF!

Your husband shrunk.

Arms frozen in the air in the shape of Naoya’s figure, you stare wide-eyed onto the now crying child below you.

Blood and bruises are still matted on his skin, his clothes, his hair – and he’s peering up at you, small, chubby arms extended as his sobs grow louder.

“Oh, baby,” you coo and pick him up, not wasting another minute before you dial Shoko, cradling the tiny, vulnerable human that is now clinging to your robes like his life depended on it.

Unsurprisingly, Naoya hates it.

The moment Shoko arrives – along with goddamn Gojo Satoru who’s been taking pictures of a hissing red-cheeked Naoya, his chaotic howling painting the walls of the infirmary – Naoya refuses to leave your side. He doesn’t even want to be set down on the reclining bed where Shoko is supposed to take a look at him. He bares his tiny fangs to the healer at all times, glaring heatedly at the white-haired sorcerer behind you.

You’re strong – you know you are – and breaking Satoru’s legs really wouldn’t be difficult. But as if sensing your hostility – which is always expected every time people even looked at Naoya wrongly – the idiot (who wasn’t so stupid right now) had activated his Infinity.

“I can’t undo it,” Shoko announces with a frown, “He must’ve picked up the curse somewhere when he weakened, but I’ve already healed his previous injuries. The stress probably let the curse manifest as well. It should wear off soon enough if he’s feeling better.”

“So he’ll turn back to normal?”

“Yes, of course,” Shoko’s smirk was mysterious. “With you as his wife, I’m sure he’ll revert back to normal quickly. Just keep taking care of him. He needs it now more than ever.”

The pair leaves not long afterwards, though not without Satoru forwarding you images of a young Naoya whose wide eyes were crystallized with annoyed tears. You hate to admit it, but he’s really adorable. That’s not your main focus though, and you immediately retreat back to your room where you wrap Naoya around your coats before settling him on the pillows.

His cheeks are round and glistening with tears, lips pouty and chubby fingers clutching your sleeves. It’s so rare to see him this vulnerable, so open, that your heart melts.

You scoot closer to him and pat his back as you sing lullabies, your lips hovering just about the soft tuft of blond hair. He yelps when another set of thunder booms like an explosion and he cries, head buried in your chest as he listens to the lulling sound of your heartbeat. It breaks your heart that he’s this unguarded, so exposed to everything that you do everything you can to comfort him, wiping his tears away with the pads of your thumb.

Singing a little louder to hopefully silence the storm, you let his cries dwindle down, the grip on your clothes loosening as he slowly falls into slumber.

“You’re safe, Naoya,” you promise, “I’ll never let anything happen to you. You’re safe now.”

The exhaustion of today’s events finally catches up to you, and it doesn’t take long before your eyes are falling as well. You dream of nothing that night, only stirring every now and then in the dead hours of the night to make sure you’re not crushing him with your weight (you’re a messy sleeper.) Thankfully, he’s fast asleep, breathing evenly and cheeks bouncing every time he huffed out from whatever he’s witnessing in dreamland.

You wake up hours later when you’re pulled into a warm, solid chest. Large, calloused hands brush over your exposed collarbones from when your clothes had ridden down in your sleep, and you freeze in his arms, about to turn and stir, to litter him with kisses but Naoya merely cages you in his arms.

“Naoya,” you croak out, almost shyly since you’re squished between his muscles that are somehow still so flawless despite his scars. “Your breakfast…let me prepare it for you. You need to heal.”

“Just a little bit longer,” his deep, morning husky voice resonates through the tranquility of the morning, and he pulls you closer with his bicep before he finally lets you pull away, his eyes nothing but soft and adoring as he smiles at you. “Let me be with you a little longer.”

You don’t know why you cried, but it’s definitely tears of happiness as you playfully pound a fist to his chest. “Silly. I’m not going anywhere. ‘Til death do us part, remember?”

“Hmm,” he nods once, “I’m not going anywhere either. And even if I leave for a bit to save the world, I’ll always find my way back home to you.”

#naoya x reader #naoya zenin x reader #naoya zenin #naoya x reader fluff #naoya zenin x reader fluff #naoya zenin fluff #naoya x reader imagines #naoya x reader scenarios #naoya zenin x reader imagines #naoya zenin x reader scenarios #naoya zenin imagines #naoya zenin scenarios #naoya best husband 💕 #ugh i've been feeling sad but this made me feel better tysm #asks with naoya's trophy wife #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen scenarios #jujutsu kaisen x reader imagines

[yesimwriting]

The Needs of Pain (part 2)

A/n since y’all liked part one!!

... i think i could make a part 3?? we’ll see lol 

This is the LONGEST thing i’ve written on here wow,, and the smuttiest 

Warnings: teasing, oral, unprotected sex (pls this is my first time writing full smut be gentle lol)

-- 

Exhaustion is an odd result of pain. I didn’t think I was that tired after the burn. I certainly didn’t feel sleepy while Kirigan cleaned my shoulder and brushed his soft lips and sharp teeth along my neck to distract me from the pain. Why am I even thinking of that? Of the way his breath felt against my skin, the way his tongue soothed any bites he left against my skin. I breathe out flatly. 

Stop thinking of him. Stop thinking of him in that context--that’s why he did it. He enjoys getting under people’s skin, that’s why he’s always insulting the way I see the world. My hand reaches to my neck, touching my skin where I can still feel his lips on my skin, tracing the faint marks I had seen in the bathroom mirror.

I should have asked the healer to get rid of them before they fully formed, but the thought of showing them to anyone was too embarrassing to bear. I force my hand away, dropping it onto my pillow. 

He had acted so strange today, he had been so blunt. It was a tactic. He wants to be in my head and I’m giving him what he wants. I sigh, rolling over and pulling my duvet further up my body. It’s too hot for this. Ugh. I kick the duvet off of my legs, letting my nightgown wrinkle up my body. Strong hands could pull the fabric up in a similar, yet much more euphoric way. 

No. Who’s thoughts are these? The fact that I picture the same hands that dabbed at my burn earlier today has me questioning my sanity. I can’t sleep like this. Kirigan wanted to be in my head and now he is. Damn him. I can’t stand him which means I can never have him.

Desire has nothing to do with tolerance. The thought leaves my face warm and stomach twisted. 

I sit up sharply, sliding out of bed tiredly. I’ll get some air and everything will be fine. The moon will clear my mind.

The Little Palace is strangely twisting at night, all long shadows and yellow lantern light. I slip out of my room quickly, but my thoughts are not immediately banished with the change of scenery. I must be ill. Infection must have set in regardless of my efforts and the healer sealed it beneath my skin and now it’s impacting me. Fever. I’m delusional with fever. 

“I didn’t take you the kind for a late night trist.” 

His voice leaves the hairs on the back of my neck standing like soldiers at attention. I manifested him the same way people manifest the devil. “Air.” My defense is childish. “I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I’d get some air.” 

The sound of even footsteps leaves me frozen in place. “What keeps someone like you awake?” It’s like he can read through me. “Thoughts of me?” 

He can never know. “Obviously.” 

My sarcasm doesn’t go unnoticed, he lets out an almost humored breath. “Or perhaps it’s pain.” 

The comment is so confusing I almost don’t realize he’s bringing up my shoulder injury. How had I let him see me so vulnerable? Why did he seem somewhat concerned in his own way? 

“My shoulder’s perfectly fine.” Good. A normal direction for this conversation to head. “It took the Healer all of two minutes.” 

The touch on my shoulder is so sudden I almost jump. Kirigan doesn’t shy away at that, fingers firmly brushing down the skin. “It feels the same.” 

I could scream. His strange observation means nothing to me, but the implication is enough to drive me mad. The implication that he knows my skin well enough to be able to judge whether the healed skin feels different is sickening. I’m tired of this. 

I turn on my heels, all of my tiredness and irritation twisting in me. “Even if it didn’t, it’s none of your concern.” 

“I didn’t realize you were extra irritable when you’re tired.”

Every conversation with him leaves me feeling petulant. “I’m not tired.” I cross my arms, keep my expression set. “I just--I wanted to get some air.” 

“Hm.” He takes a step forward, preparing to close the small distance I’d managed to create between us. “And why is that?” 

The question leaves me irritated in an odd way. A flat way. There’s a narcissistic entitlement in that question. An entitlement to my thoughts. I shrug. “I hoped it’d make me tired.” 

Kirigan draws his eyebrows together, curiosity and something resembling amusement playing at his expression. “If you’d like to be tired, I think I know a few ways to be of assistance.”

A faint, aggravating warmth comes to my face. Not only did my lie earn me a ridiculous innuendo, it’s also trapped me in a corner I cannot escape. Healing from the burn had left me pathetically drowsy. There’s no way he can’t see through me, a tired haze has to be visible on my face. My eyelids feel weighted and I’m too distracted by my deep longing for sleep to hold onto irritation. 

“I’m sure I’ll manage on my own.” The words are not meant to be a challenge, just a way to dismiss him. I don’t think he takes them that way. 

He draws his eyebrows together, eyes threatening to lose that curious quality. Kirigan steps forward, I step back blankly, desperate to keep enough distance to keep what’s left of my wits about me. He ignores my reaction, taking another step forward. I take another step back. My back touches the wall. I am a mouse and he’s an excited cat. 

“You don’t have to,” his voice is too low, too intimate, “I’m not sure that’s something you want to understand.” 

My chin raises just slightly, a silent protest. “Dependency is a fatal flaw.” 

“So is desire,” his reply is much too quick. “Desire is worse, because one can resist dependency based on pride...but desire, that is something that one sacrifices for.” 

Maybe if I was less tired I’d bother to interpret his words a little more. But all I can focus on is his tone--the quality of it. “You sound heavy.” My voice is as light as the night breeze I was craving moments ago. “But you always sound heavy.” It’s the wistful observation of someone slowly disappearing. “At least you’re pretty,” I muse, falling more and more distant by the second.

Something soft breaks across his features, his lips quirking. “Pretty?” 

I rest my back against the wall comfortably, eyes shutting without permission. “I’m sure I’ll regret that comment in a moment.” 

He stays silent, but his presence does not disappear. I can’t tell if I’m glad for it. The warm touch on my shoulder startles me out of my drowsy trance. Panic has me ready to jump off the wall, but Kirigan brushes his thumb up and down my shoulder. His touch sets any skin that comes in contact with him aflame. I shouldn’t find the gesture so comforting. My eyes flutter shut again, my body relaxing against the wall. When my protest dies out before it begins, Kirigan shifts closer. I’m confused, but too at peace to answer. Something velvety and warm brushes against my collar. Soft and warm and electric. He’s kissing my skin again. 

My lips part in hopes of arguing, but when his teeth graze the skin he already marked earlier I’m gone. My eyes shut again, but this time it’s different. Pleasure and drowsiness clear me of all inhibitions as his touch becomes more and more assured. I let him test me, his mouth moving against any and all exposed skin. I don’t even stop him when I feel his hands graze the hem of my nightgown, wrinkling it the way I imagined earlier. 

“Kirigan.” I need to find my strength, but what’s the point of strength when his touch leaves me so warm? The only acknowledgement of my protest he offers me is the lingering squeeze of my thigh before his long fingers begin to graze towards the inside of my thighs. I have no choice but to let his lips brush up my neck, his teeth grazing my skin the way they did earlier today. “Kirigan.” I try to sound firmer, but he destroys the rest of my sentence before I have the chance to get it out. His teeth nip the base of my neck, ruining my protest for a second time.

 Maybe if I was less tired I’d be able to fight him off a little better, but I’m so drowsy I had trouble thinking before he started touching me. My eyes shut in both bliss and exhaustion. His thumb presses into my hip. Something in me stalls as his fingers brush the hem of my underwear--testing me, challenging me. I open my eyes on instinct, but he remains unbothered, slipping his thumb beneath the only fabric that divides us in order to better grip my hip.

I stiffen because of how badly I want to melt. This is bad. This is insane. We’re in a hallway in the middle of the night and he’s General Kirigan. Whatever attraction I feel is another tactic to manipulate me. 

“We need to stop.” The command is weak, my voice as dry as my resolve. 

He angles his head in order to regard me a little better. His expression is one of mock confusion as he smirks. Actually smirks. “Stop what?” False innocence drips from his voice as he leans towards me, expression amused as his lips near my own. “I haven’t even started yet.” My eyes widen, something that amuses him. “Y/n?”

I’m left on edge. I’m left wanting. My lips part flatly, but words feel so distant. “Yes?” 

“What happened earlier?” His voice is the kind of sinful that’s meant to coax. Kirigan brushes his thumb across my shoulder, eyes watching mine cautiously. “How did you get burned?” 

I push against the sultry quality of his voice. “I told you--an accident.” 

“Hm.” His eyebrows draw together in a surprisingly soft way. I stare at him freely, but he ignores my gaze, eyes locked on my newly healed skin. Is he truly that concerned? “Whose accident?” 

I swallow once. “My own.” He still isn’t looking at me. “I’m not exactly the most coordinated person, you’ve witnessed my clumsiness yourself.” 

Kirigan is not convinced. Perhaps he will never fully buy my partial lie. His grip on me hardens. Restraint. I may not be able to win against his paranoia, but I might be able to distract him. Cautiously, I move one hand forward, touching the hand that’s on my shoulder. I hesitate. Touching him without prompting almost feels too intimate. I’m being ridiculous. I brush my fingers against the back of his palm, letting my touch trail up his forearm. 

“Y/n.” My name borders on a warning. 

I suppress a smile, playing into my sleepiness as I tilt my head to the side. “Yes?” 

He doesn’t reply, expression tightening as my hand snares around his wrist, pulling it off my shoulder with more care than I thought myself capable of. The intensity of his gaze is enough to burn me. I turn my full attention to his hand. I’d never admit this out loud, but this isn’t the first time I’ve thought about how objectively attractive his hands are. I kiss each of his knuckles slowly, brushing my lips against his skin tentatively. 

To my surprise, he allows my indulgence. I glance at him through my lashes. Kirigan’s eyes are shut, expression bordering on pained. “Kirigan?” 

He opens his eyes but his expression does not ease. His other hand leaves my thigh, grabbing the low collar of my nightgown with such a fierce speed it takes me a second to realize what’s happening. He pulls me away from the wall in a way that borders on violent. 

“I don’t know who you’re protecting, but I guarantee you they’re not worth it.” The words are acidic. He’s seething. “I grow tired of your resistance.” 

If he hadn’t transformed into something so untamed, I might have had enough gall to tell him I grow tired of being toyed with. I say nothing, instead I take in the abrasiveness of his anger, the tension of his grip on the thin fabric that clothes me. I am unflinching in my assessment in the most tired way possible, eyes struggling not to shut and body desperate to rest, but even more desperate for him. His eyes stare into mine, searching for something I am too far gone to offer. He must realize my sleepiness is genuine because he soon drops his gaze, taking his time in analyzing the even rise and fall of my chest as well as the hint of cleavage his grip on my nightgown is exposing. Pure heat finds itself in my face, chest, and worst of all---core. His staring lacks any shame. 

Kirigan parts his lips as if to speak but then instead takes a moment to lick them. The thought of his tongue in relation to lips only makes the burning in me worse. It’s practically an ache. A needy one. 

“I grow weary of your lack of understanding.” 

Understanding? “What is there to understand?” 

His head angles itself to one side but he doesn’t meet my gaze. The hold he has on me loosens just enough so that his hold on me is no longer taut. That should not disappoint me the way it does. I wait patiently, ignoring the bundle of unexplained nerves in my stomach as best as I can. Something strange colors his features when he finally looks at me again, something almost vulnerable. 

“I brought you here.” He sounds farther from me than ever. “I…” His exhale is gentle, but his expression is quick to harden. “Who are you so willing to protect?”

I must be really tired because his voice sounds like it borders on heart ache. If I didn’t fear Arthur’s safety I’d tell Kirigan everything if it meant his pain would dissipate. I never thought Kirigan’s potential pain would bother me, but now that I’ve seen him look stricken by something so weighted--now that I’ve seen the way he wears pain--I don’t want to be the one to give him that. I want to be the one to give him some kind of sanctuary. The thought leaves me with a desire to flea. 

“Will you just believe me when I say it’s no one?” In a way that’s the truth. Arthur is not particularly significant unless you’re a young Grisha female with a desire for heart ache. “No one worth mentioning at least.” 

He’s quick to retighten his hold on my nightgown, leaving the fabric taut and more of me exposed. “You being desperate to protect them makes them worth interest.” A different response than I expected. 

My lips thin. “Only because it was a small accident. They don’t deserve to be punished over the briefest loss of focus.” 

I take his silence as an indicator that he is considering my words. His free hand finds my shoulder as he pulls me even closer to him by the fabric he’s gripping. “And if I were to revoke the threat of punishment?” His voice is the definition of temptation, low and promising and coddling me with its sinfulness. I still as Kirigan leans forward so that his lips are practically on my ear. “Then would you tell me? If I released you from the binds of your nobility?” My lips part but I have no words prepared. Before I can think of what to say, his lips graze the side of my jaw before his teeth nip at the end of my ear. “Tell me just to humor me.” 

The command doesn’t make sense to me, but from his lips it feels important. “You won’t hurt them for what happened?” 

His voice seems rougher than before, “Would that make a difference?” 

“It would make all the difference.” I don’t like the honesty of my words. 

Kirigan allows one hand to trail down my waist--a gesture I consider obscenely intimate when paired with the soft brush of his lips on my collar. “I already know who.” His voice is a dark hum. “I was always going to know one way or another--but it’s good to know you would have told me.”

My stomach lurches, dread pouring into me like tar. Before fear can force me to take action, Kirigan begins to leave open mouth kisses from the top of my jaw to the bottom of my neck, taking his time to assault any spot of skin with his tongue that he wants. This reminds me too much of earlier--touches meant to distract from pain with the use of pleasure. 

“Are you--” His mouth is now on my collar, threatening to destroy my question. “Are you going to hurt him?”

At that Kirigan straightens. The sudden lack of contact leaves me cold. I shouldn't be thinking of him. Of his touch. “I’m curious,” he draws out each syllable, delighting in my nerves, “Would you bear his punishment?” 

I’m not sure. I hate that. I haven’t known Arthur for that long, and while he’s kind, he also seems to see all women as replaceable. That isn’t reason for him to endure Kirigan’s punishment but I don’t know him well enough to just blindly agree to that. I loathe myself for not being noble enough to take Arthur’s punishment instantly. 

“What kind of punishment?” 

Kirigan’s expression twists into a greedy smile. He pushes me back easily, pressing me into the wall with more confidence than ever. I’m silent in my confusion until he presses himself against me and I feel something hard and bulging press into where I’m neediest. I stifle a gasp of surprise and something similar to pleasure. “I’m sure I could think of something for you.” I’d care more about my confusion if hot need wasn’t flooding my thoughts and my body with undeniable desperation. “I haven’t even spoken to him.” I exhale, untrusting relief desperate to escape me. Kirigan is quick to lean forward, lips brushing my ear as he prepares to whisper. “I’m more likely to harm him because he has your favor than anything else.”

Warmth burns my face. “He doesn’t--he’s not exactly the one that holds my favor.”

The heat of his breath adds to my burning as he presses his bulge into my core again. “And who does?” 

I’m not sure what he considers favor, but if it has anything to do with wanting he wins. But he can never know that. “There are some contenders, but no one yet.” 

His hand moves off my hip and nears my throat. “Would it be too bold to assume I’m on the short list?”

He’s two steps away from taking me in an open hallway, I doubt he finds much bold. “Do you want to be?” 

Kirigan’s hand tightens on my throat. “I’ve made it clear from the beginning what I want.” His words are lethal and each syllable has him restricting my airflow a little more. Something in me must be broken because my neediness only worsens. “I brought you here because I see all that you could be. Forget being a Saint, we could be gods.” The sentiment is so raw it’s almost harder to bear than his tight grip on my neck. He leans close again, his scent only adding to my budding lightheadedness. “Say the word, and I could have you praising me like I’m already a god.” My stomach knots in both nerves and insatiable hunger. “Though I’m the one that would be doing the worshipping.” 

My resolve is shattered, leaving me broken and twisting. He releases his hold on my neck in order to move his hand beneath my chin. There is nothing gentle about the way he jerks my head forward, forcing me to look into his eyes. Something about the look he gives me has me melting. His eyes are searching for something in me.

He must find whatever he’s looking for because I feel his touch against my heat, fingers pressing against fabric. I bite my lip on instinct, suppressing the sound of my undoing. Kirigan’s eyes never leave mine as the hand on my chin moves to brush against my bottom lip. 

“I can only give you what you want if you tell me what that is.” 

He exhales slowly, pressing his thumb against my lip downwards. My mouth parts on instinct, something that he takes well. His thumb enters my mouth slowly, taking in my reaction as I taste his skin on my tongue. Kirigan pulls his thumb away from my tongue slowly, a thin string of saliva connecting him to my mouth. With one swift tug, his free hand pulls the only fabric separating him from where I want him most down my thighs. His expression reveals nothing as his thumb, still wet with my saliva, is pressed against my core. His touch teases my clit, just barely brushing where I need him most. The whine that escapes me is so desperate I’m ashamed I can’t help it. 

“So wet already,” his appraisal is gentle, the praise whispered against my throat as his lips brush against my neck. “So wet, so needy that you’d let me take you in this hallway and I’ve hardly touched you.” His finger presses further into me. I let out another pathetic breath. “A pity, someone like you--so painfully under cared for.” I’m reduced to nothing by his words and touch. “What I’d give to undue you here, against the wall--I’d have you crying so loudly everyone would know that I’ve claimed you, that I’ve made you mine.” Before I can reflect on his words, he steps back, pulling my underwear back up as quickly as he yanked it down. 

I let out an instinctual whine. My hand moves to his arm, grabbing him like he’s the only thing keeping me tethered to the earth. “What--” 

Kirigan squeezes my hand, a predator’s smile on his lips. “I want to feel all of you,” his hand squeezes my hip, “I can’t exactly do that against a wall, dove of mine,” he leans forward, lips brushing against my jaw in a way that leaves me chilled and melting at the same time, “At least not the first time.” 

His whisper forces my breathing to hitch, a fact that he notices with an amused look as his thumb brushes against my collar. Kirigan pulls me away from the wall easily. Even the causal touch feels electric against my skin. 

The walk towards my room is tense, his hands never leaving me as if he’s aware of how necessary it is to keep me distracted to ward off my better sense. When we reach my door, Kirigan opens it like it’s his. Entitled. Typical. 

I step into the room, his touch lingering on my arm. A brief shyness pushes itself into my chest. I had let Kirigan touch me in a public space and lead me back to my room. The door closes. I don’t turn. 

Kirigan’s hand squeezes my shoulder. “Shy, now?” His question is teasing, rekindling the fire beneath my skin as he places an open mouth kiss on my neck. He plays with the thin strap of my nightgown, pushing it off my shoulder. He kisses down my neck, collarbone, and shoulder. My inhibitions are melted away again. “When your breathing stalls like that,” his whisper is enough to elicit a desperate shudder, “I am left desperate.” 

He leans forward, mouth trailing down my chest, coming dangerously close to my breasts. The electric current of his touch is all consuming and addicting. I press my back into his chest. His hands are the opposite of shy, touching me everywhere except where I’m most desperate. Kirigan’s hand places itself between my thighs, using his thumb to tease my entrance. I let out a needy sound. And then he retracts his hand, grabbing my shoulders and turning me in one swift motion. 

“Kirigan.” 

His eyes are dark, clouded by something I don’t understand but am too aware that I reciprocate. “Tell me that I have your favor.” His words are taut, bordering on snapping. Kirigan’s grip on me tightens hard enough to bruise, an assertive need taking over him. “That you want me.”

Desire, pride, and rationality twist in my stomach, leaving me too distracted to form words. My gaze drops to the ground on instinct, something Kirigan clearly finds unacceptable because he’s quick to grab my chin and force my eyes to meet his. 

I swallow once, courage withering beneath the look in his eyes. It’s as twisted as a spindling shadow, but the look is fierce admirational, appreciation so deep I could drown in it. It scares and consols me all at once. “I want you.” There’s something pained about such powerful emotion. I loathe and am empowered by it all at once. “I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything.” The words leave my throat scorching with their sincerity. 

As soon as the words leave me, he’s closing the distance between us, the slightest exhale of tension leaving his lips before they meet mine, prepared to devour me. I reciprocate his actions on instinct alone. There is no hesitation, no space, and yet it is not enough. Not enough and yet I don’t know how to be closer. But Kirigan does. One of his hands cup my cheek, coaxing me towards him as if I could possibly have the will to leave him. He steps forward, guiding me to step back. I obey fluidly until I feel something hit the back of my legs. It’d startle me if I wasn’t so consumed by his touch.

His mouth begins to move away from my skin. I chase after him, desperate to keep him touching me. He stops me by placing a hand on my shoulder, a warning about my neediness. I pout, but as he studies me I pant. Maybe the excuse for air was a good idea. I don’t fight the uneasiness of my breathing as I hold Kirigan’s gaze. He regards me with a patience I consider unbearable, taking in the determined look in his eyes, my swollen lips, disheveled hair, and the top of my night gown that’s half falling off. 

It’s in this moment I realize how much more vulnerable than him I am. 

If Kirigan notices any shift in me, he doesn’t mention it. Instead, he adjusts his hand on my cheek, his thumb brushing the hot skin gently. “You are everything.” His voice is cracking glass. “Everything that’s good, at least.” 

Maybe he did notice my initial reaction because I am no longer certain that I am the one that’s most vulnerable. “You’re better than you think.” I only say this because it would only weigh on me more to stay silent. “I see it and you don’t want me to.” 

His hand continues to stroke my cheek. “I want you to see all of me.” The heavy beating of my heart seems to stall in my chest. Kirigan drops his hand before grasping the hem of my nightgown. He pulls the fabric upwards easily, bundling the fabric above my hip. “I want you to…” He exhales flatly, pulling the fabric upwards even more. Nerves flood my stomach as he leans towards me, kissing down my jaw. “To know me,” he whispers against my throat.

I am nothing but uneven breaths as he mouth moves down my chest, stalling only once he’s reached my breasts. He pushes me forward easily, guiding me so that I’m laying on my bed. He’s quick to move over me, kissing up my neck as he adjusts so that I’m against the headboard.

When he pulls away again, I’m left pouting. He grins, fueled by my disappointment. “Don’t worry,” he breathes, fingers hooking around the waistband of my underwear before tugging it down my legs easily, “I’m nowhere near done with you yet.” 

Being so exposed has my doubts flooding back, but Kirigan is quick to fight against my instincts in a way only he seems capable of. He squeezes the inside of my upper thigh before leaning down, pressing his mouth onto the skin his fingers just touched. His kisses here are meant to leave me even more desperate, each nip and fleeting pass of his tongue is lazy yet intentional. I am incapable of doing else besides letting out pathetic whines. 

He ignores where I need him most, kissing up my thigh, across my lower stomach, and then down my other thigh. Kirigan continues the pattern across my skin, ignoring any pleas I swallow my pride to give. He is not rushed by my words or cries or the occasional desperate adjustment of my hips. 

Kirigan lifts his head slightly, releasing my inner thigh with an obscene ‘pop’. “Patience.” His fingers trail up my thigh and over my core, teasing my entrance with his lithe fingers. “Unless you’re ready to beg?” 

It’s a challenge, like everything else. The urge to give him my pride to satisfy the electric desire I’m not sure I’m capable of bearing. But then I note his tense hold on my thigh. A sign of restraint, of want. 

“And if I want you to beg for me?” I don’t know where the words come from, but they charge the room with potential. 

Something strange crosses his fingers before his lips tilt upwards in a dark way. “Would you like the strength of that? To have someone like me powerless before you?” My face warms. Kirigan leaves a lingering kiss on my thigh before he moves off the bed. I sigh at the loss of contact, but my tired neediness stalls at the sound of his belt coming undone. “I want to see you on your knees.” I sit up carelessly, desperate to obey him. I’m kneeling in front of him in an instant, taking in his length. The size of it has me gaping. “Open your mouth.” 

I take the order more eagerly than I should, but I make no move to take him. This is just another challenge. I keep my eyes on his as I stick my tongue out before licking the bottom of his member all the way up to his tip. The sound he lets out is pure sin. I lick his tip slowly, each motion of my tongue is strategic as I finally place him in my mouth. I hollow my cheeks, moving up and down slowly. 

The pace is not enough for him, he grips my hair from my scalp as he thrusts into my mouth. The motion is more powerful than I expected and I am left unable to breathe. My slight gag does the opposite of discourage him, he repeats the motion again and again, pushing himself into me until I can feel him in my throat. 

The sounds he lets out are a chorus to me, but it’s not enough. I need more control, I need a way to make him beg. I raise a hand, wrapping it around the base that I cannot fit into my mouth. I stroke him once slowly, making a point as I try to push myself back in order to make him want me more. 

He groans again. I make a point of pushing myself off of him. Precum protrudes his tip. I lick it off of him slowly. I lick up and down his member in the smallest way possible. 

“Y/n,” the restraint in his voice fuels my teasing, “Tease me and you’ll still be overwhelmed by want when the sun rises.” 

A pout tugs at my lips before I open my mouth again, taking Kirigan to my limit. He lets me set the pace of my bobs at first, but then he becomes desperate, holding me in place by the roots of my hair as he moans and thrusts into me without restraint. He ignores my choking as he continues until he throws his head back, letting out a quick praise of my name.

He finishes in my mouth and I swallow all he offers me greedly. I back off my knees slowly, throat burning as his member leaves my mouth. “On the bed.” He’s turned into something insatiable. “Now.” 

I move back to my bed, laying in the same position as before. He takes his time approaching me. When he finally gets to me, he kisses my thighs easily. I let out a small breath before something that’s pure pleasure meets my core. His tongue laps upwards lazily, grazing my clit but not quite touching it.  My hips thrust towards his face, but with hand he holds me down. A coil in my stomach continues to build as he angles himself more purposefully, tongue finally taking care of my clit. My gasps become less and less reasonable as he continues to lap at all that my body has to offer. The coil tightens, I see stars--and then, like cruelty personified, he pulls away. His absence leaves me ready to cry out. 

My desperation only fuels Kirigan as he lines himself with my entrance. Concern twists my stomach as I consider how full my mouth felt when he was in me. I expect some level of warning, but he thrusts into me with no warning. I let out a pathetic cry, but that means nothing to him as he pulls out just to thrust into me with full force again.

“Only I can hurt you,” he demands, thrusting into me as I call out his name. My eyes water at the sensation of such fullness, pleasure and pain combining themselves in a way that leaves me incapable of thought. “Your tears,” he muses, one hand moving to wipe at a tear rolling down my cheek, “Are mine.” 

His thrusts become more and more brutal, less and less even. Each movement of his body in mine leaves me begging for more and less at the same time. He continues until the coil in my stomach tenses to the point of breaking. 

“Kirigan,” I manage, voice far away, “I’m going t--”

“I know,” he offers, “finish with me, dove.” His hand finds my throat, adding the slightest bit of restrained pressure. “And do not hold in your cries.” 

Two more sharp thrusts have us both finishing, calling out for each other as we try to draw out the high of our orgasms together. 

We stay intertwined like that for longer than we should, but then Kirigan stands. I envy his ability to do so. I don’t call for him even though I still don’t want to be alone here. A moment later, I hear him approach. I’m too drowsy to ask what he’s doing as a damp towel is wiped against my forehead and inner thighs. 

When he’s finished cleaning me, some raw emotion settles in my chest. “Are you leaving?” 

Kirigan hesitates. “Not if you don’t want me to.” 

I roll over, the motion leaves my body aching. Kirigan accepts my invitation, crawling beneath my sheets and adjusting our bodies so that he can rest his hand on my back. 

--

Tags: @luminous-99 @voyevoda-thejoy @voidmalfoy 

@i-padfootblack-things

 @all-art-is-quite-useless @buckverse @mandowh0re @benbarnes-supremacy

@we-love-our-bandz @fire-in-her-veinz @weirdowithnobeardo @bvudzsoo @kaque @ponyboys-sunsets @coldlilheart @granillx @dreamohlittledreamofme @sanna2020 @zaynzierulez 

@ive-died-everday-waiting-for-you @xxaerynxx @ralesera @tea-effect 

@tranquillitymoon

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone x reader #shadow and bone show #shadow and bone imagine #general kirigan #general kirigan x reader #general kirigan imagine #general kirigan x you #general kirigan x reader smut #grishaverse #grisha #grishaverse x reader #grishaverse imagine #grishaverse x you #the darkling #the darkling x reader #the darkling smut #the darkling x you #the darkling imagine

[twistedmusings]

Doing Anything for Heat

“Do you always refer to yourself in third person when writing these up?” 

“Legalities, Prefect, although I do not expect you to know anything about that.” 

Guess who can’t write as much anymore because she got a nasty bite at work! So yes, I was working on requests so diligently and then bam--this happens. 

As an apology for my late ass writings, please take this mini scenario for the Octavinelle Trio! Azul’s SSR card got translated and I just...god I love these boys so much q wq  Reader: [G/N]  Warnings: Casual flirting, possessive thoughts from all the boys and just MC striking up a contract with Azul and taking a very creative approach towards it~ 

“[Y/N]!!!!” Grimm pulls at your arm as you sit down across from Azul, the man holding out a contract to you as he tilts his head with a smile. “What will it be, Prefect?” 

Your hands sweat as you rub them on your legs. “Hehe~ Little Shrimp looks so scared~” 

The contract is placed in front of you slowly, Azul taking care of minding his manners as you lean back and go over the simple specifications. Made simpler, of course, since Azul had ‘such’ a kind heart. 

What a con artist. 

Winter was hitting Night Raven College hard but was hitting Ramshackle even harder. 

How many blankets had you bought from Sam’s shop? Ten? Twenty? You honestly didn’t know but you and Grimm were close to freezing some night and you had just about enough of living in an ice cube for a dorm. 

You were acting out of desperation. 

And, ever the businessman, Azul had stretched out his hand for your unfortunate soul. 

“Bring sixty customers during our lunch rush tomorrow and Azul Ashengrotto will personally see that a heater is installed in Ramshackle the same day.” 

You put the contract down and look him in the eye. “Do you always refer to yourself in third person when writing these up?” 

“Legalities, Prefect, although I do not expect you to know anything about that.” 

Great, more insults towards your intelligence. 

Sixty customers. If you were to break that down it would be ten from each dorm not counting Octavinelle. You could rope Ace and Deuce to come, guilt trip Jack for not helping you with that assignment due last night, kindly ask Epel to make his way over here and maybe if you promised Sebek that you would listen to him rant about his dorm leader he would reluctantly agree. 

But that wouldn’t be near enough. 

Azul clicks his tongue while Jade speaks up, “We will have to take that answer today, [Y/N]-san. If not, I guess maybe we could let you take some blankets from Octavinelle--” 

“Fine! Fine.” you sign your name on the dotted line and hand the contract back to Azul, the other grinning as he handed it towards his right-hand man. “How wonderful! I’ll be waiting with baited breath to see what you bring us tomorrow~” 

You give Azul the fakest smile you can muster, waving goodbye to the twins as you make your way out of the lounge with Grimm by your side. “Fgnaaa~! We are screwed! [Y/N] how could you! We are going to be stuck waiting tables for ETERNITY now!” 

“Not if we bring them what they asked for.” you bite your bottom lip as you look at the Monstro Lounge, your eyes falling on the small stage. 

Oh right. Some students played here. Well, students deemed worthy enough to play. You remember the Music Club trying to do a gig here but failing miserably the moment Lilia opened his mouth. Despite the failure, it did bring some people in to get Azul over the red. 

A floorshow. 

That’s right! A floorshow! 

“Grimm!” you grab the cat and bring him close as he freaks out. 

“What--what!” 

“I got it!” you hold him out in front of you, “We are going to have to let go of our pride a bit and this experience might humble us but...we will have heat!’ 

“[Y/N] you are scaring me--” 

Grimm barely gets to say what he wants as he is dragged back into your arms, your feet running as fast as you can into Mr.S’s shop for the stuff that you will need.

--------

“Ah! Little Shrimp!” 

Jade looks up from the numbers he was crunching, smiling as he sees you approaching the table. You wave at Floyd and nod politely towards Jade, sitting down and tapping your fingers against the bar. 

“You are here rather late, [Y/N]-san. We have two hours until closing time.” 

“I’m just…putting my plan into action. Azul said he wanted sixty by tomorrow, after all.” Floyd grins as he finishes cleaning up the remaining glasses. 

“Eh? You are doing something tonight, little Shrimp?” 

“...yes.” 

He leans close, smiling wider as he sees a certain change in your appearance. The Monstro Lounge was always dark in order to provide a more atmospheric mood at night but with the little light he had to work with he could clearly see traces of makeup all over your face. “Little Shrimp looks so shiny...just like a pearl.” You pull away as he tries to get closer, putting your hand out to stop him and turn your attention towards Jade. “Right. Do you have a backroom next to the stage? I just need to get some things ready--” 

“Go into the kitchen, farthest door to the back. There should be a door that leads you towards the back of the stage.” “Do you guys have a light booth--” “Next to the stage.” Jade’s eyes shine, interested in what you are about to pull off, “Do you need our help--” 

“Nope that is alright I can take care of this myself thank you.” 

Both twins watch you trot towards the kitchen, Grimm following close behind and about three ghosts ‘matching’ his step. 

“...Floyd.” 

“Yes?” 

“Call Azul. I think he’ll be interested to see what is going on.”

--------

“For heat. For heat. For heat!” 

You were doing this because of your situation. The situation was desperate so you had to take desperate measures. 

Grimm clears his throat as you finish fixing his bowtie, the transparent fabric looking beautiful with the stitched shells all over it. 

“Are the ghosts ready?” you ask. 

“Just waiting for the curtains to close.” 

The crowd goes quiet as you press a few buttons and close them, hushing the late night crowd as you step onto the stage. You try to step softly so that the click of your heels won’t be heard while Grimm opens up the rather large shell in the middle of the stage. This was usually used as a promotional device, customers taking pictures inside it to promote their visits to the lounge. It had a soft cushiony seat inside and could fit a whole student. 

You give a thumbs up to your other roommates, the ghosts smiling as their instruments manifested in front of them. 

Spectral instruments really came in handy in these situations. “Breathe...Breathe…” you sit down inside the shell and pull your legs up with you, fixing the train of your dress and touching the small shell tiara on your head. It was fashioned after King Triton after all, maybe Azul would get the reference?

Or rather, you hoped Azul wasn’t watching at all. “Okay...close it, Grimm.” He nods and brings the top of the shell down slowly, trapping you both inside as he gave the cue to start up the lights. This was all for a heater...and maybe some tuna. 

-----

-At first he wanted to laugh as he saw the curtain slowly being drawn back, when was the last time they used this stage? Student players just weren’t ‘in’ as much anymore and he had to keep up with the trends. What were you planning to do with this? 

-Yet his mouth clicked shut as the lights landed right on the shell, the music starting as your voice rang out softly from inside. 

-He barely paid attention to the band as the shell slowly opened, Grimm flying out elegantly as he opened it while your frame was slowly being revealed to him as every student’s jaw almost hit the floor. 

-Azul clutched his cane as he watched you cradle your legs close to yourself, the lyrics completely blowing past him as you stretch yourself out to show off the outfit you had on. It seemed to shine like a pearl under the lights, your chest being accentuated by how snug it fit against your frame. 

-He licked his lips when his eyes landed on your undecorated neck. It was as if you were begging for it to be decorated with bites. Surely he could make a nice necklace for you. 

-Dammit he should have sat closer, students were actually getting up from their booths and moving to any tables that were closer to the stage as you start getting up, the train of fabric in your outfit resembling the top of a shell as it brushes across the ground as you make your way to the floor. 

-He bites his bottom lip as he sees you making your way around the tables, your voice soft and melodic as the students watch the performance flabbergasted. You are letting your fingers glide against the tables, winking at some of the more bold students who put out their hands so they could touch yours.

-If you were to look at his face you would see no trace of emotion but inside his head he was screaming at you to pass by his table already don’t you know anything about customer service? 

-You finally make eye contact with the table he was sitting at, Azul feeling a shiver go up his spine at how your flirtatious eyes suddenly turned nervous. Nobody else had gotten that look.

-Again, he needed to see you looking at him like that again. 

 -So this is what you were planning. How interesting~ 

-He watched from behind Azul, taking off his coat and laying it on the back of the plush booth as he took in your form. Where had you gotten such a cute outfit, he wondered. The color made you shine like the rarest pearl and every time the light hit you just right he could see the glitter in your eyelids as you started to approach their table. 

-You made eye contact with him, clearly trying to keep up the act of ‘mysterious’ floor show guest but failing as his eyes took you in the closer you got. 

-The students groan when they see you sit right next to Azul, pressing close to him as he dares to put an arm around your waist and squeeze. Oh he could bet Azul was happy with how jealous all the students looked. 

-Jade couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped him when you took Azul’s hat and shoved it in his face before pulling away as quickly as possible. 

-He follows your movements as you walk behind him, the sudden hand on his back making him hum in thought as the idea of pinning you right to the back of the booth so you would sing only to him suddenly seeming like the only thing to do in this situation. 

-You really had no idea what you could awaken in him if you kept playing around. 

-His eyes meet yours as you start walking away but his hand catches your wrist as he tugs you back to him--!

-But Jade, ever the unpredictable man, only presses his lips to your hand before letting you go.

-You were doing a floor show for the customers after all. Didn’t mean that he wouldn’t be talking to you later~ 

-Floyd had moved himself to the table closest to the stage, tie undone and smile wider than anyone had ever seen as he watched you pay attention to almost every table. The table he was sitting at had been filled with students who deemed themselves rather lucky to get so close only for them to scram when they saw who was approaching it.  

-He waves at you when you finally make eye contact with him, licking his lips and smiling as he sees your reluctance to get near him. 

-Which he didn’t mind, the fact that you were so wary of him made you all the more adorable. 

-You try your best to be as flirty as you had before, merely touching his hand as he holds it out to you but for Floyd that is not enough. The moment your fingers pressed against his palm, he snatched your wrist and brought you to his lap, students gasping as his hands landed on your sides. 

-Oh the material was so soft! He ran his fingers up and down as you press hand to his chest while you sang the last few notes of the song. 

-Floyd couldn’t help the little giggle as he saw the embarrassment on your face, your hand clearly pushing on his chest but his hands clearly weren’t letting you go. What were you going to do, little Shrimp? 

-His eyes widen at your sudden improvisation, your hands taking his and pressing them to your face so he could cup your cheeks. Instinctively he pulled you closer as the song suddenly stopped---

”Floyd-senpai, I have to go.” 

-The whisper is only for him to hear as you catch him off guard with that soft look and pull away, you holding out the last note of the song as if you had planned to be caught by him all along. 

-He clicks his tongue and leans back, eyes watching you go back up the stage and sitting inside the shell as you pull your legs closer to you before blowing a kiss to the now applauding crowd as Grimm closed the shell. 

-Surely the kiss had been for him, right? If it had been for any of these other bottom feeders...well no matter. Even if it hadn’t been for him, Floyd would make sure to squeeze you real tight the moment you got off stage. 

-----

You lay down on the cushion as you put your arms over your eyes, groaning as you tried to get your thoughts together. 

If this worked out the way you thought it would, word of mouth would get around and you would bring around sixty customers so that they could partake in what they had missed tonight. 

Has it cost you your dignity? Yes. 

Was the outfit embarrassing? Yes. 

Did you have to flirt with all three Octavinelle members so they would see that you were serious about finally going to sleep without shivering? Yes and yes. 

At least it was over. 

“Yo Grimm. Can you open this? I want to change!” 

Your hands tap the top of the shell, sighing in relief as it slowly opened. 

Only for you to yelp as hands pin you down to the cushion, a very familiar face grinning down at you as Floyd laughs merrily. 

“Ahaha~! Nee, that kiss was for me, right Little Shrimpy? You blew that my way, right?” 

Jade sighs and steps behind his brother, pulling him up by the collar so that you could get your bearings. 

“It was at the customers, Floyd. I believe [Y/N]-san wanted this to be spoken about tomorrow, correct?” 

You nod as he lets go of Floyd and holds out his hand for you to take. 

“What an interesting plan...right Azul?” 

The Octavinelle dorm leader isn’t really looking at you, he is still staring at everything that you had on taking it as much as he could before your voice brought him back. “So...how did I do?” 

Azul blinks before smiling as he steps close and holds out his arm for you to take. 

“I have yet to see the terms of the contract be met but...we can discuss how you did in my office. Mind telling me how you came up with this plan? ” 

“Y--Yeah! Sure!” 

You take Azul’s arm and speak about your thought process, not noticing the grins on the eel’s faces as they hold themselves back until they reach Azul’s office. 

How nice, it would be the first time you would be staying over at Octavinelle, even if you didn’t know it yet.  

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #octavinelle #octavinelle trio #azul x reader #jade x reader #floyd x reader #Azul Ashengrotto #Floyd Leech #Jade Leech #twst mc #G/N reader #available books #//im...im a simp

[nakedbibi333]

hi! im kind of new to law of assumption and old to law of attraction. law of assumption is not a hard concept but im a bit confused. i find myself reacting to the 3D too much and like i find it hard to persist? what do i do to make persisting easier? i think it’s because i don’t know much about what im getting into?? all i know is affirm and persist and etc. i hear things like time is an illusion, the 3D is an illusion, circumstances don’t matter, we are all gods of our reality. but WHERES the proof?? i can’t blindly follow people’s success stories because im not them and if we are truly the gods of our realities, doesn’t that mean someone else can manifest failure in mine? like i want to use law of assumption and i want to believe to get what I want fast and easily BUT i want to know how it works and that im not following a delusion to make myself feel better and in the end, I am just left with disappointment and failed attempts at manifesting that left me with the consequences of my actions. ive been in the community for almost 2 years and i don’t think ive ever gotten results. i am not usually agitated but it’s exhausting. i affirm and persist and nothing shows up and im worried im doing it all wrong so i ask and now I’m even affirming wrong?? I know manifestation is supposed to be easy and not feel like a chore but how can it not when everything I desire is of so much importance to me. I can even dm you, just please help me so I can actually manifest what I want. I’ve done self concept but I keep breaking. I don’t even know what affirmations to use to combat my limiting beliefs. Tbh I’m tired. I feel like if someone explained to me how this works and how to do it with no mistakes and how to keep faith in the unseen, I could actually get what I want. I keep failing and failing because I affirm and persist but I affirm wrong or I have a limiting belief that hasn’t been uncovered yet. I’m so exhausted and I just want to get what I want. I just feel like if someone told me how it works and exactly what to do, I wouldn’t be so confused and find it hard to persist

Hi! Okay, so since this is a very long post, I will try to answer each of your questions/concerns in the order you mention them.

So about persisting, I can understand how it seems a bit complicated. You persist when, after a certain period of time, you still don't see movement of your desires manifesting OR if you see the OPPOSITE of your desires manifest. Oftentimes, when you finally open up your mind to the idea that your mind creates your reality, then some past doubts and fears can manifest as well. Your mind will often try to manifest opposite things in order to make you feel like you are doing something wrong, which is why so many loa teachers say to persist. It can be very difficult for people to persist, which is why so many people feel like they can't manifest, or that manifestation isn't real, because their 3D reality has too much weight in their lives, so they take it as truth and end up giving up on their desires manifesting. It's important to begin to believe that your 3D reality is extremely malleable and is only a reflection of your inner reality. You need to take the power away from the 3D and give it to yourself and your ability to create exactly what you want.

Then you ask about proof of manifestation. It is very true and understandable that other people's success stories are not enough for many people because you want to be able to trust the information that you are going to be getting into. Personally, before getting into manifestation, I already had my fair share of unexplainable success stories in my life, so it just seemed like an answer to the questions I've had all my life. Even with these success stories and experiences, when I first got into manifestation, I still would doubt myself by wondering if it was simply a coincidence these things happened, or worse, that I was becoming delusional. I want to tell you that every single person who is now into manifestation has gone through this feeling. We all worry that we are just doing "wishful thinking" and being delusional because the world we have grown up in has always been so practical. It's not easy to believe in something that seems so impossible without any previous personal experience. So, the only advice I can give you for this is to try to manifest extremely small things to build your faith over time, such as seeing a yellow butterfly, getting your favorite food, or seeing some sort of sign, so that you would know that what we are talking about is actually the truth. Also, there are so many documents that go more in-depth on how our minds create our reality, including CIA documents and books about the science of manifestation, such as books by Joe Dispenza, and books about the subconscious mind, such as books by Joseph Murphy, and many many more. Since the only way, you will really believe in manifestation is by having your own experiences, then manifesting small easy things is probably the best route.

Then, you mention how you're worried about "someone manifesting failure into your reality." My view on this is that you are the only person who can affect your life and nothing can happen to you that you don't specifically manifest into your reality (whether it be consciously or unconsciously). Everyone can manifest, yes. Everyone has control over their reality. You can even manifest people acting in certain ways towards you. But that's in your experience specifically. If we are talking about quantum physics, time is not linear, technically all possibilities of all time, ever, exists right now. We also shift through different realities at every moment depending on our mindset, beliefs, and decisions. So, if someone manifests something in their life that would affect "you" but does not align with your thoughts and beliefs, then it won't show up in your reality. You have control over your own reality, nothing comes into your life without you allowing it, so that's a very empowering thought, in my opinion. I really suggest that you affirm this so that you don't have to worry about others manifesting negativity over your life because you would never personally decide to manifest it into your own life.

I also want to talk about how you worry about affirming wrong or simply manifesting wrong. It's Important to note that these beliefs can also negatively affect your manifestation because that is not you truly living in the end. If you were living in the end, you would know that simply deciding that you want this to happen, means that it will happen and that it has to happen. You never need to doubt your manifesting process because your subconscious mind is so powerful and it is so easy to make it do things for you! Just like what @divineangelbee says, you can COMMAND your subconscious mind and it will listen and give you exactly what you want. You don't have to visualize or affirm or do anything. Simply tell your subconscious exactly what you want it to do and trust that it listens! I really think that the reason that you have not been having too much success is because of this, that you are constantly doubting your methods which keeps you from truly living in the end.

Then, about limiting beliefs. It can be beneficial to people to be aware of their limiting beliefs. However, there has been such an intense focus on limiting beliefs in the loa community (mostly on youtube) that I see so much. Coaches keep you focused on the problem of limiting beliefs so much that they don't actually help you move on from them. Personally, I found that whenever I focused on my limiting beliefs, it was like living in the old story. (if you don't get this reference, I seriously suggest you read or listen to Neville Goddard's lectures in which he talks about the law of assumption. They are life-changing). Focusing on limiting beliefs keeps you stuck in that story you are telling yourself about your life. It keeps you from overcoming them and becoming limitless. It helps me to affirm that my limiting beliefs no longer have the power to hold me back. I don't have any more limiting beliefs because I manifested not having them anymore. Manifestation works in many different ways, and a lot of people don't realize that you can simply manifest your desired mindset as well. I suggest trying this!

So, to make this as clear as possible, I will tell you how I personally manifest (disclaimer: people manifest differently, many different things work for different people, I am not saying this is the only or best way to manifest, but this is just what works for me).

First, I get my idea of what I want to manifest. Usually, I want to manifest multiple things at a time, there really is no limit.

Then, I will decide what will help me "feel it real" and "live in the end." This can include techniques, but I don't use techniques every time. I don't like to visualize because I am personally a maladaptive daydreamer, so visualizing makes me feel like I am daydreaming, which keeps me from really feeling like it's really happening. (But, if it works for you, by all means, go for it) I may print out a picture if it's a physical item in order to trick my brain into having something physical that represents this or adding it to a Pinterest vision board (I am a very visual person, so it always works for me). I also like to make a list of what I want just to keep it in a place that I can go back to and mark off in the future, telling my brain that this is a goal I need to achieve (I find that my brain loves to check things off of my goals, it makes my subconscious mind already start working towards the goal). But most of the work goes into my mindset. I don't affirm a lot because I feel like it becomes a chore if I have to recite affirmations all day every day. I may put up affirmations on my chalkboard or put them on my computer, but I don't make it a habit to really say them at specific times, etc. I really focus on making myself feel deserving of getting my manifestation and I also live in the end. Living in the end is where you feel confident that your desire is already yours. If it helps, which it does for me, I like to believe that I have it already in the "quantum field," or the 5D, or however you believe in it. It is not about being delusional and pretending like you have it, no, it's about feeling trusting in your own power to make this happen for you and it will come, no matter what.

After that, I "drop it." I don't forget about it or stop desiring it, that's not what letting go means. It means that I know that I don't need to do anything or force anything to happen because my subconscious, or the universe, will bring this to me and I don't need to worry about anything related to my desire. I also self-regulate my emotions by meditating, focusing on the things that make me happy, and reminding myself of how powerful and capable I am.

Then, eventually, it manifests. Or, if it doesn't come in the timeframe I wanted it to, or if something that would oppose my desire pops up, I focus on my own self-concept, making sure I genuinely feel deserving of and that I can get what I want, and I persist in that feeling that my desire is still mine. No matter if I got rejected, no matter if they told me I couldn't get the job, no matter if it looks like it won't happen. I still persist. and then it comes.

Finally, I want to mention that I am only here to give advice and I can't make anything physically happen for you. To see actual movement in your reality, you need to be willing to go through failures in order to find out what works for you. I have had manifestations fail, I have had MANY manifestations fail. It's not always a perfect process. I don't charge money, my identity is not on this page, I am not here to be a famous coach or to act like I know any better than anyone else. I am just trying to help you guys reach the point that you deserve to get to in your life. But I can only do so much. I really hope this helps.

#ask #advice #long post

[agent-whiskeys-sweetheart]

Meant To Be (iii)

Pairing: Hotch x F!Reader

Summary: After meeting Garcia you make quick work of helping with the case, desperate to prove yourself to Hotch. Once the two of you help the team wrap everything up it’s time for them to return home. Which also means it’s time for you and Hotch to talk. One on one.

Warnings: Nothing in this chapter.

Word Count: 5,288

A/N: I wanna say I’m super happy you guys are enjoying this series cause honestly I’m having a lot of fun writing it! I love you all dearly. (If you’re just now finding this series, that’s perfectly alright! I’m glad you’re here! Feel free to catch up and enjoy the rest of the story. Here’s a link to Part 1 and Part 2 of Meant To Be.)

The elevator ride to the bottom floor of the building was quick, allowing you to make your way to Garcia’s office in a matter of minutes. There was a plaque up next to the door, indicating that you were in the right place. Taking a moment to steady yourself you exhale before knocking on the door. A voice on the other side tells you to come in so you do. Around you are dozens of impressive looking monitors, all of which are doing something different. On top of the long L-shaped desk there were several small trinkets and toys, bringing a sort of life into the dark room. The woman sitting in front of you spins around in her chair to look at you, a quick flash of confusion on her face. She looks extremely kind and everything about her appearance makes you want to smile. 

“Hello. My name is Y/N L/N. Are you Penelope Garcia?” 

“Yes, I am. What can I do for you?” Once you’re sure you’re in the right place you step forward to shake her hand. She stands so that you are both on the same level now, shifting awkwardly. 

“Sorry to barge in like this. Everything has gone pretty fast this morning. I’m a new agent for the BAU. Today is my first day. The rest of the team just left on a case and SSA Hotchner asked me to stay behind and help from here.” Her face lights up with a bright smile.

“Oh, that’s awesome! It’s really nice to meet you! Please come in, sit down. Make yourself comfortable.” With this, she pulls another chair up to the desk and then sits back down in her own. “I didn’t actually know we had any new agents joining us. That being said, welcome! I’m almost always here by myself so the company will be nice. You and I can get to know each other.” You nod with a smile, watching her as she continues what she was doing. There are several different tabs open across the screens with loads of information that she seems to be compiling. When she sees your incredulous face she laughs.

“I know, it’s a lot. I’m just trying to get as much preliminary information as I can to send to the team. That’s what you’ll be helping me with. We collect research, data, important records. Anything they need to find out, we provide. Kind of cool, right?” Remaining silent, you nod. Upon seeing this, Garcia stops typing for a moment. “I know it may not seem as exciting as field work but it’s still very important. Don’t worry, I’ll make it fun. I promise you won’t be bored.” Patting your knee, she continues typing and you watch carefully now. This is where you will be until the case is over so you intend to make the absolute best of it. Everyone on the team has their own special skills and now is the time to learn from Garcia. 

“So what exactly are you looking for right now?” 

“I am compiling a list of the victim’s friends and family, plus witnesses from the robberies who might be able to give us any information. This will give the others a clear list of where to go first. I’m also seeing what I can find about the people who were at the banks on the days of the robberies in case there’s anything useful they need to know. Financial troubles, criminal records, anything to possibly link the witnesses to one another.” Scooting your chair forward so you can see better, you lean an elbow on the desk. 

“What can I help with?” You ask hopefully. 

“Oh, I think that was the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. I can’t even count on one hand how many times I’ve had someone down here and all they do is sit and look over my shoulder. Sorry, rambling. I can get you logged into a monitor here and it looks like the next thing on my list was looking into the victim’s workplace. Sound good?” 

“Yes, absolutely.” She moves over quickly and gets a separate monitor opened so you can begin researching. 

“We’ll probably do what research we can in the next twenty to thirty minutes and then we’ll call the team to tell them what we’ve found out.” With that, you make quick work of doing everything you can in the time you have. Even if it is the last thing you ever do, you will prove to Aaron Hotchner just how valuable a team member you are. 

++++++++++

The jet takes off fairly soon once the team is onboard. They all stow their go-bags and begin settling in for the flight. It is going to be a longer one today so they are all preparing themselves for the journey. Aaron finds a seat near a far window where he sets the case file down in front of himself and begins reading. His mind is swimming with thoughts and he will do anything to quiet them. The scene plays out over and over in his head, the memory still painfully fresh. Why had he said those things? He was unnecessarily harsh and he is fully aware of this. Now the first memory you’ll have of starting your dream job will be your new boss treating you appallingly. What had even compelled him to speak to you that way? Seeing you had overwhelmed him. The way you looked when you came into his office for the first time. The way your hair framed your face, the light hopefulness in your eyes, the way you captivated him with your movements. Standing there, just feet away from him, you had looked just as beautiful as the first day he met you. God, why did he lie like that? How could he have said he didn’t recognize you when you had stayed in his thoughts more times than he would like to admit over the past year? All the emotions he felt at the mere thought of you made him nauseous and he had no way of understanding them. As badly as he felt for it, he knew that for the time being it would be best to let you work from the BAU headquarters. 

“Hotch, are you okay?” JJ’s voice brings him quickly back to reality. The fact that she could see how deeply in thought he was makes him feel an odd sense of shame and he straightens in his seat. 

“Of course, I’m fine.” With this, she goes back to her own seat. With a huff of exhaustion, Hotch continues reading. The cabin is silent for a time as the other team members sit reading their case files. 

“So,” Morgan’s voice breaks the quiet. “What do we think of Y/N?” The mention of your name causes Hotch to perk up against his will. 

“Well, I like her.” Emily is the first to chime in. “I know you guys all got to meet her before me but there’s just something about her. An inherent sweetness. I’m really excited to work with her.” 

“Me, too,” JJ says next. “I thought she was kind and open. In this job, that kind of personality is hard to find. I just hope the things she sees doesn’t cause her to lose that. The world needs more kind people, not less. She seems tough though. I think she can handle it.” 

“I totally agree,” Morgan adds, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed. “She’s got a little bit of fierceness in her but I like that. You’ve gotta be tough to do this job but she’s also sweet. That’s important too. Plus, that kid’s got the cutest smile. Kind of reminds me of my sisters.” At the mention of your smile, Hotch closes his eyes briefly trying to picture that smile directed at him. He quickly catches himself and looks back down at the file. 

“Well, I can’t say I know her that well yet but she seems intelligent. She certainly has eagerness to learn. I think that will help her be successful. It’s very ... refreshing.” Spencer says with a small smile.

“I agree. Right off the bat she’s got a very likable energy,” Rossi begins letting himself trail off for a moment. “Although, I have to say there is something about her that is so familiar. I can’t quite place how I might know her though. Her name too, I recognize it. For a second I thought she recognized me too but I can’t be sure.” The rest of the team watches him for a moment as he tries to recollect how he knows you but he quickly comes up blank. “I’m sure I’ll think of it eventually. Nevertheless she seems like a good kid. I’m excited to see her at work. Just a shame we’ll all have to wait.” 

Hearing this Aaron shifts in his seat, knowing that the comment is directed at him since he was the one that made you stay behind. He is suddenly very aware of the other team members looking at him. 

“Yeah, Hotch. Why isn’t she here? I thought for sure you’d wanna see what she can do.” Derek locks eyes with Aaron, causing him to debate how to answer the question. All his life Hotch has worked to control his feelings and the way that they manifest so his face remains expressionless as he thinks for a short second.

“I think that for right now her time would be better spent helping Garcia and getting used to her new environment. I agree that she does seem very intelligent and more than capable. I would just like to speak with her one on one first before thrusting her into the high intensity atmosphere that comes with our line of work.” However, this answer doesn’t seem to satisfy Morgan’s curiosity. 

“She told me when she came out of your office that you said you didn’t remember her. Is that true?” This continued line of questioning makes his blood begin to boil. Aaron Hotchner of all people knows that lies are what cause the foundations of trust to crumble. If he can’t be honest with himself, how can he expect to be honest with his team? And yet, he finds himself unable to expose his own misdeed. 

“Yes, that is correct. We’ve had a lot of cases come and go in the last few years and no one should be expected to remember every interaction they have in that length of time. According to her it was only one day and it was a long time ago at that. I apologized to her and she understood. That is the end of it.” 

“Look, I’m not passing judgement Hotch. I’m just saying I can understand why she was so hurt,” Hearing this causes his heart to clench. “She looks up to you. She didn’t even have to tell me that, I could just see it. You mentored her in a time that was very uncertain, when she had a lot to prove. She still has a lot to prove and I’m sure she thought that you would have her back and the first thing you tell her is that you don’t even remember who she is? I get it man, you’re under a lot of stress right now but she’s a part of your team. I just thought you of all people would be a little more sensitive than that.” 

His words cut right through Aaron’s heart like a knife but before he has a chance to say anything the laptop screen in the center of the cabin lights up, revealing you and Garcia. Glad for a break from the tension the rest of the team members look toward the screen. With one last glance at Morgan, Hotch leans towards him. “We will discuss this later.” His voice is firm and dangerous but he pulls away to look at the laptop. “What did you find?” He directs at the two of you.

Seeing him causes you to straighten in your seat as you ready yourself to put on your most professional face. Garcia begins telling everyone what she was able to find out about the victim. She has significantly more information than you do but once she’s done she allows you to share what you found. The victim worked at a local grocery store but he had been previously employed at the bank where the robbery took place. The team begin building a rough profile based on the information. You listen closely to their analysis of the unsubs, making mental notes on what you might add to the profile. Before you have a chance to add anything, Hotch thanks the two of you for your work and hangs up. For a moment, you could swear you saw a hint of sadness when he looked at you but you were sure it was just a glitch on the screen. 

“Sorry sweetpea. I could totally tell you wanted to add something. They can be pretty abrupt like that sometimes.” You simply give a small shrug. “Well, why don’t you tell me what it was? It’ll give you a little practice for building profiles.” She scoots to the edge of her chair, looking at you intently to which you give a small laugh.

“Well, as we know all of the unsubs are large burly men. The five of them could easily subdue the few weaker people that were present at each of the robberies and yet they chose to bring guns. I believe this shows that they feel a certain sense of inadequacy in their everyday lives. Despite their masculine appearance I would suspect they all have mediocre jobs where they are looked down upon or treated poorly. It’s possible that they all work at the same place but I would imagine they probably met somewhere else. Maybe a support group of some sort. The use of weapons gives them a sense of power over the victims that helps them live out their mass fantasy. The victim of the last crime scene was shot in the head which indicates some personal relationship between him and the unsub who pulled the trigger. That could be a good place to start.” 

“Well, it definitely makes sense to me. Maybe we can start looking in to possible support groups for these type of men. Oh, and anyone that might possibly have had reason to kill our victim.” Garcia immediately begins typing and you scoot closer to her side. 

“Shouldn’t we wait for the order from Hotch?” She laughs at this. 

“Trust me, sweetheart. At the end of the day he’s gonna thank us for the head start. One thing to know about the boss man. He likes to see initiative but he also wants you to follow his exact orders. It’s a fine balance but once you figure out how to work the line, he’s gonna love you for it.” The thought of Hotch loving you for anything at all in the world makes your heart flutter. Almost instantly you stop that train of thought and berate yourself for even entertaining it. 

“Well, I guess we better get started then.” The rest of the day goes smoothly. You and Garcia coordinate everything beautifully, finding a good amount of information that you save to send to Hotch at the most convenient time. The day seems to be over almost as quickly as it began and you thank Garcia before heading out to your car. The drive home seems to be much more monotonous than before. It seems like you’re back inside your apartment and stretched out on the couch before you can hardly blink. Rolling over, you reach for your phone which you had thrown on the coffee table. With a groan, you begin dialing your sister’s number. As much as today sucked there was no one in the world you’d rather vent to than your sister. 

“Well hey there babe. I’ve been patiently awaiting your call. Give me just a minute to get sat down. I want to hear every last detail.” There are sounds of shuffling on the other side of the phone as she finds a seat. “Okay, I’m all good. Now, tell me about your first day at the BAU! Was it everything you dreamed it would be?” 

“Yeah, not exactly,” You laugh. “It was kind of rough to be honest.” There is a moment of silence as you think how to begin.

“Okay. Start at the beginning, walk me through it.” 

“Alright. Well, I got inside and I was honestly just in awe of being there, just getting to stand in that room. It felt like I was invincible. Derek Morgan was the first one to talk to me. He was just as charming as I remembered. Anyway, he introduced me to the rest of the team and we got to talk for a bit which was really nice, you know? From the get go I really felt like part of the team.” 

“Now you know I hate to interrupt but all of this sounds great!” 

“Yeah, well, that was the best part of the day and it didn’t last very long. After I met everyone I went up to Aaron Hotchner’s office to give him my paperwork. I’m sure you know by now that I was pretty excited to see him again, right? Well, when I told him how excited I was to be working with him again he told me that he didn’t actually know who I was. He completely forgot about me. I mean, I guess I get it. It’s been a year and a half and he meets a lot of people. Why would he remember me specifically?”

“Y/N, don’t invalidate your own feelings. What he said upset you and it’s okay to be hurt. That would have hurt my feelings too. You’re a really great person and he sucks for not thinking about you ever since he met you.” Hearing this, you can’t help but laugh a bit. Her ability to defend you no matter what always cheers you up. 

“Thank you. I appreciate that. I just wish he thought the same. Anyway, I gave him my paperwork so I could travel with the team. They got a case this morning and I was planning to go with them but for some reason Hotch made me stay behind even though I am cleared to be in the field. It just really bummed me out because I was super ready to get out there and start working but I got benched for my very first case. He had me stay with this girl named Garcia, she’s the team’s technical analyst. I mean, she’s really sweet and we worked super well together but I just wish I could have been out there doing the things that I spent seven years of my life training for.” 

���I am so sorry. That sucks. I know how excited you were. Look at the bright side, this is only your first case. You’ll have plenty of opportunities to get out there and prove yourself. It’s all gonna work out.” Unable to keep from smiling, you roll over on your side. 

“Thanks. I really hope you’re right.” Sensing the fact that you’re still upset she decides to help by changing the subject. 

“So, who all did you meet today? I know you already knew a few of the team members but was there anybody new?” 

“Yeah, Elle and Gideon are no longer there. I’m really sad I missed getting to work with them but the people I met seem really amazing. The first girl I met was named Emily Prentiss. She was really nice. The other was a guy named David Rossi.” When you finish your sentence there is nothing but silence on the other end of the phone. You wait a minute for your sister’s response but there is nothing. Before you can ask what’s wrong she chimes in again. 

“Did you say David Rossi?” There is a tone in her voice that you don’t recognize and it causes concern to stir in your stomach. 

“Yeah, why? What’s up?” There is another moment of silence. 

“It’s -- it’s nothing. I shouldn’t bring it up. You’ve already had a rough day.” As if she can sense your anxiety she continues. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing bad. I promise I’ll tell you later, okay? I just don’t think we should talk about it right now, that’s all.” As much as you want to pry you can tell that no matter how much you ask, you’re not getting the answer out of her. With a sense of unease you agree and try changing the conversation again. Once you’ve changed the topic to something other than work you can feel her ease again and the two of you talk for nearly 45 minutes. After a while you decide to call it a night and shortly afterwards you find yourself in bed. You hadn’t even realized how exhausted you were until your head hit the pillow. Your sleep is dreamless which you decide in the morning is probably a good thing. 

++++++++++

The remainder of the case is spent hunkered down in Garcia’s office either doing frantic research or simply getting to know one another. In just a short while the two of you become very fast friends. You realize quickly that you share a lot of common interests and all of your conversations are endlessly fascinating. It also doesn’t take you very long to realize that you actually enjoy the work that you do with her. There is quite a bit of skill required to dig as deeply and accurately as the two of you do. It is a race against the clock to find everything you need in order to help the team and there is a certain level of excitement that comes with that. Of course you still wish you were out in the field but in the end you learn a lot and make a good friend along the way. The case ends rather succinctly with all five unsubs found and arrested with no more casualties along the way. It’s a good feeling, knowing that you helped to catch the bad guys and no one had to die for you to do so. The day the team is set to return you and Garcia head out for coffee before they show up, figuring that you deserve a little treat after all of your hard work. You make light conversation as you make your way back into the building just in time for the team to arrive. You watch them each make their way to their desks, setting down their bags and taking a moment to rest. Of course the last one to walk in is Hotch who heads straight up to his office, shutting the door behind him. 

When you feel like it’s an appropriate time you make your way over to Morgan’s desk. Upon seeing you his lips crack into a wide smile. 

“Well hey sweetheart! I have to say, you did awesome work on this case.” As he says this, he extends his hand for a high five which you quickly grant him. “I know it wasn’t easy having to sit out but you did great. I’m proud of you.” It takes everything in you not to blush. 

“Thanks. I learned a lot and I made a good friend along the way.”

“Yeah, Garcia’s pretty great isn’t she?” He says with a knowing smile.

“She definitely is. She talks about you a lot, you know.” 

“Oh, I know. Baby girl just can’t stop thinking about me. Not that I blame her, of course.” At this you lightly punch his arm. 

“You are both such teases.” This makes Morgan laugh. 

“We gotta keep things interesting.” He leans forward as though he’s about to start his paperwork but he quickly leans back to look at you. “Hey, now that I’m back we gotta go out for drinks tonight. Everyone else is already game so long as you are.” 

“Yeah, I’d like that.” You confirm with a grin.

“Great. You know, I’d say I’m buying but I kind of feel like you owe me.” Your brow furrows in confusion.

“What do you mean by that?” 

“Well, I was trying to get some answers for you so I asked Hotch why he wouldn’t let you on the case and he royally chewed me out for it. In his defense I probably shouldn’t have asked in front of the rest of the team but that decision still just doesn’t sit right with me.” Morgan’s words mingle in your head. It doesn’t sit right with you either but it isn’t really your place to question your boss’ orders. 

“I’m sorry he got upset with you. I do appreciate you defending me though. You’re my knight in shining denim.”

“Anytime kid. I’m happy to help.” Getting to talk to Morgan has almost instantly lifted your spirits. However, it doesn’t take long for your heart to drop into your stomach. 

“Agent L/N. May I speak to you in my office please?” You hadn’t even noticed that Hotch had come out of his office until his voice drew your attention to him. With a quick look at Morgan, who gives you a reassuring glance, you push yourself off his desk and make your way over to where Hotch is standing. Once you’re at his side he extends a hand, allowing you to step inside first. He follows quickly, shutting the door behind him. “Please, have a seat.” He says, gesturing towards a leather couch on the far wall. As you begin to sit on one end he takes up residence on the other, his knee just inches away from yours. Once you’re both settled he focuses all of his attention on you. He doesn’t seem angry but you aren’t holding your breath. It’s best to just stay professional and speak with him earnestly. 

“I’m glad to see you all back safely sir.” You begin. After the stress of the case, you want to make sure he knows that as hurt as you were by his previous decision you harbor no ill will towards him. 

“Thank you. It’s not very often that cases end as well as this one did. You understand that, don’t you? This was a special circumstance.” 

“Yes, I realize that. I’m just grateful that it did end happily even if it was just this once.” There is an intensity in the way he watches you.

“Good. I just want to make sure you fully know what to expect.” 

“I do sir. I did the day that I applied for school. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.” Staying silent for a moment he nods as if in thought. 

“I know before I left I said we would be able to talk. I’d like to learn a little bit more about you and from there I’ll be able to evaluate your abilities before taking you into the field. I know it wasn’t the decision you were hoping for but I hope you understand it nonetheless.”

“Of course. It’s not my place to question you and in the end I learned a lot from Garcia. Plus she was nice to work with.” 

“Good. I’m very glad to hear that you were able to make the most of the situation.” He stops for a moment, his gaze relaxing. “I wanted to tell you how well you did on this case. A challenge was presented to you and you handled it with grace. The information you provided was incredibly helpful and your suggestions were very well thought out. I was very impressed.” The softness in his eyes as he praises you leaves a fluttering sensation in your stomach. Throughout the entirety of the case you had been so hell bent on proving yourself to him and hearing him say that you had done well made every hour of hard work worth it. As much as your heart is singing you have to remind yourself to be calm. Even though he is being kind to you now, he had made his feelings known to you during your first meeting. There is no reason to read into things. Clearly he doesn’t feel what you feel. 

“Thank you sir. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed when I was left behind but I realized that I’m grateful to be here no matter what. I worked really hard to get here, to be doing this kind of work, and not everyone gets the chance to do what they’re truly meant to be doing. As heartbreaking as the outcome of this job usually is, I can’t imagine myself doing anything else.” With every word the two of you are locked into one another’s eyes. For a moment you can almost swear he is holding his breath. 

“I appreciate that sense of purpose. I will always support my team but it makes it easier with members who are invested.” 

“I am. Completely. I’m here. I know you haven’t gotten a real chance to see me work but please know that my heart is in this.” 

“That was never in question,” Hotch pauses, letting his eyes fall to his lap as he considers his next sentence. “I believe now that I made a rash decision in asking you to stay behind. I can see that you are mentally prepared to be in the field. I apologize for my harsh words. I of course can’t say anything for your physical performance yet but I won’t be able to evaluate the full extent of your abilities until I am able to watch you in the field. On the next case I would like you to join the rest of the team.” A breath of relief leaves your lips.

“Of course. I’m ready to get to work.”

“I know. You’ll have the chance soon enough. In the meantime, if you have any questions or concerns feel free to come speak with me.” 

“Thank you sir.” Hotch simply nods in response, beginning to stand. You follow his actions, gathering that he is done with the conversation. As you make your way to the door, feeling much lighter than when you came in, he stops you.

“Agent L/N,” The sound of his voice causes you to turn back. “I just wanted to say again that I’m sorry for not remembering you. I never meant to hurt you. It isn’t that you were forgettable. It’s just that a lot has happened in the last year.” This apology seems much more heartfelt than before and you try to hide a smile. 

“I forgive you, sir.” With that you take your leave, making your way right back to Morgan’s desk. The shift in your mood must be palpable because he looks up at you with a smile.

“That’s not the face of someone that just got yelled at by Hotch.” 

“No, no he didn’t yell at me. He was just telling me I did a good job and he cleared me to work in the field on the next case.” 

“Good for you, kid. I’m glad we’re finally gonna get a chance to see what you can really do,” Nodding you rest against the edge of his desk again. “Now, see? That wasn’t too bad was it?” Looking back towards Hotch’s office you can see him bent over his desk, filling out paperwork. Being able to watch him for a moment without fear of falling apart allows you to crack a small smile.

“No. I guess it wasn’t.” 

Tags:  @talesfromtheguild @lannister-slings-and-arrows @gryffindorwriter @nopeforyou @sheerfreesia007 @roxypeanut @ohpedromypedro @ssahotchie @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa @readsalot73 @the-mechanical-angel @races-erster @maxlordd @pascalisthepunkest @paintballkid711​ @hotchafterhours @h0tchner @ssahotchswife @ssahotchhner @technotic-prophecy @klinenovakwinchester  @hotch-stufff @annadorothxa @canadailluminate @yoshigguk @gothicxbarbie @romanogersendgame​​

#aaron hotchner #ssa aaron hotchner #agent aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x y/n #female reader #hotch x reader #hotch x you #hotch x y/n #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds reader insert #meant to be #part three #series #bau reader #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #david rossi #jennifer jareau #penelope garcia

[harbingerofsoup]

The comprehensive guide for why absolutely everyone should read and watch this work of art.

First of all, Iruma is best boy! He loves his friends and his family, his instinct is to help others, and like… just look at him. So good, so pure. But what truly makes Iruma a protagonist worthy of having a slide to himself is his character development. He actually starts off as a completely selfless person due to how his awful parents groomed him, and his whole character arc is learning how to be more selfish. Of course, Iruma’s selfishness manifests as eating all the food he wants, holding on to his family and friends, and finding ambition.

Sullivan (the first guy) adopts Iruma as his grandson after his parents sold him. This dude radiates grandpa energy and his number one priority is to spoil his new grandson. He’s also the principal of the school he sends Iruma too. And one of the most powerful demons in the netherworld. Opera is Sullivan’s butler, and warms up to Iruma a bit slower than Sullivan (so like a few days). They’re not very expressive facially. Rather they mainly express emotions through their ears and tail. They’re a total Badass™ and surprisingly mischievous. Alice Asmodeus (on the left of the 3rd pic) swore his undying loyalty to Iruma after Iruma accidentally kicked his ass. This man is ride or die, and honestly my words can’t do him justice so it’s better if you just experience this gay disaster for yourself. Clara Valac (right of the same pic) is a gremlin and I love her. Her priority is to play with her friends All. The. Time. But she also has insecurities about her personality after it stopped her from making friends. I put Ameri Azazel (please step on me) in between them. She’s the student council president, a badass, and a huge romantic. Naberius Kalego is the homeroom teacher of the misfit class (the class Iruma ends up in.) He’s a Very strict teacher, but genuinely cares about his students and is good at his job. There are so many other characters, but I want to avoid spoilers and get sleep tonight.

14 year old Suzuki Iruma was raised by his parents to do chores and make them money. Eventually they decided that he wasn’t bringing in enough, so they sold him to a demon who takes him to the netherworld. Instead of eating him though, Sullivan (the demon) asks him to become his grandson, and Iruma, who’s unable to say no under any circumstances, says yes. He starts school at the demon school Babyls (pictured above) where he attends as the only human. Of course if anyone finds out they’ll eat him. While at school, he realizes that he doesn’t have an ambition of his own, so Ameri suggests that he try climbing the ranks (all demons are ranked by their power you know the drill).

This manga is hilarious! With such jokes as Iruma eating a ridiculous amount of food, every interaction between Asmodeus and Clara, and Ameri’s obsession with shojo manga. One of the funniest bits is that due to some unfortunate circumstances, Kalego becomes Iruma’s familiar, and you’ll learn all about this if you check it out, but for now all you need to know is that that fluffy chicken is Kalego. Crossdressing has been used for comedy like three times now, but not in a degrading way. It’s not the butt of the joke or anything. That’s Iruma, and he looks fucking amazing as many other characters have said many times 100% seriously. Moving on, cause explaining humor is difficult!

I adore how Clara is allowed to be a hyperactive gremlin, and I’m not talking “oh she’s quirky” I’m talking playing involves battle axes and acting like a demon bowling ball. You know the trope where the powerful girl isn’t actually that serious and instead is a huge romantic? Well Ameri may be a romantic, but her seriousness isn’t an act. She is 100% dedicated to her ambitions. And look at the designs for some of the recurring background characters! Too often in fantasy settings the female monsters, demons, etc are reduced to almost entirely human, with the exact same body type, and maybe horns or something. Not Here! There’s also the girls in the misfit class who all have their own motivations and interests. I’m also now realizing how many tall girls are in this series… awesome.

Ok so the fact that there’s even more than one queer character already make this amazing. But in addition to that, it’s never treated like a big deal. I mean look at the second picture “gender doesn’t matter to demons” love wins! So Eiko is a recurring character who has a huge crush on both Iruma and Ameri, and later becomes comrades with Asmodeus specifically when it comes to Iruma (they share photos of him it’s hilarious). Asmodeus having a crush on Iruma isn’t explicitly stating, but like I’d like to see someone argue that he doesn’t. Besides, his feelings are always treated the same as Clara’s and Eiko’s when it comes to Iruma. The holy grail of representation though is Opera who’s never referred to by gendered terms. The english dub of the anime actually specifically uses they/them pronouns. When I tell you I screamed! I could go on, but I’m I’m trying to avoid introducing too many characters.

In Mairimashita! Iruma-kun a good family supports and loves each other completely, regardless of blood relations. But it’s not either or. Sullivan, Opera, and Iruma are my golden standard for found family. I mean their love of Iruma is over the top and unconditional, which is what Iruma needs after a life without any such love from his parents. Biological relations are shown as something that isn’t always great, yet it’s not something to be expected either. Clara’s family is a gift, and Asmodeus’ family is one of the funniest dynamics I’ve seen.

These are typically considered negative traits, but here they are portrayed as desirable and useful. And it’s a convincing argument. Through Iruma we see that having your own ambitions and getting pissed is necessary for living a fulfilling life, and we see this because he starts out without having that. Every single time Iruma declares his own ambitions or says something selfish it’s just… chills. It’s always a powerful scene. Whenever Iruma gets truly pissed over something (which has legitimately only happened twice) we all cheer cause we’re so proud of him. I could write a whole essay about this one aspect of the story, but just know that I consider this to be an incredibly compelling narrative, and my favorite part of Mairimashita! Iruma-kun.

In conclusion, I’m posting this on my birthday, so as a present I would like more people to get into this fandom because it deserves a larger fanbase.

#mairimashita! iruma kun #welcome to demon school iruma kun #i said i was gonna do it and i did #my favorite series needs more love

[barbarab1707-blog]

About Dany the Dragon, chains, and how Jon sealed his fate at the Dragonpit meeting

Daenerys is a dragon. I think no one can argue with that. She calls herself the Mother of Dragons, people call her the Dragon Queen. 

She also sees herself as a dragon, as per this:

And this:

Olenna even tells her: “You’re a dragon, be a dragon” which is also the “counsel” Missandei gives her before her death, “Dracarys” (=be a dragon).

And at the end the showrunners show us this:

Dany has finally completely embraced her inner dragon.

How does this tie in with the Dragonpit meeting? Well, this scene is full of foreshadowing of what is bound to happen in season 08, especially regarding Dany the Dragon and Jon’s fate.

Before the dragonpit meeting, we have this piece of dialogue: “Dragons don’t understand the difference between what’s theirs and what isn’t. Land, livestock, children. Letting them roam free around the city was a problem.”

So, dragons don’t make the distinction between what’s theirs and what isn’t. Dany being a dragon, she is the same. 

Which is shown by this (land):

Dany not making the difference between which lands belong to her or not, could be further illustrated when Dany tells Jon this in s08: “what happens when they demand you press your claim and take what’s MINE.” She considers the 7 Kingdoms to be hers, when they are, by right, Jon’s.

This (livestock):

And this (children):

The second part of the sentence about letting dragons roam free is more important though. The Dragonpit was built in order to contain the dragons and control the damage they could do. 

In Dany’s case, what prevents her doing too great a damage, what controls her inner dragon and prevents it to “roam free” are her counsellors. They are her Dragonpit if one could say. Jorah, Barristan, Tyrion, all helped at one point or another to stop her unleashing her inner dragon, which manifests as anger. They also all failed at one point or another.

From the beginning of season 04, Dany herself started slowly slowly fearing her inner dragon, her own power and anger, which coincided with the moment where she started fearing her children’s power and wildness. This culminated with her locking and chaining Rhaegal and Viseryon in s04e10 and thus, trying to repress her nature.

However, trying to repress her nature didn’t seem to work all that well for her.

Besides, while his brothers were in chains, Drogon was still “roaming free”, which could mean that, as much as Dany tried to repress her impulsive and prone to anger nature, she still couldn’t fight it completely. Something that is confirmed when she feeds Meereenese nobles to the still chained Rhaegal and Viseryon mid-season 05, after Barristan’s death which angered her. 

Moreover, at that point of time, she doesn’t have anyone to keep her in check anymore, as Jorah is in exile, and Barristan is dead. Instead, she has Daario and Missandei encouraging her to embrace her inner dragon. Dany starts reconciling with it when she escapes the fighting pits on Drogon’s back. She is free again to be who she is. She embraces again her inner dragon when she burns the khals and takes over the khalasar (something that isn’t hers to begin with but feels entitled to have).

She wants to go full on dragon when she makes that speech to Tyrion when she returns to Meereen:”I will crucify the masters, I will set their fleets afire, kill every last one of their soldiers and return their cities to the dirt. That, is my plan.” Tyrion, who has taken Jorah’s and Barristan’s vacant positions, manages however to temper her first impulse. 

But, it’s interesting to note that he was the one to set Rhaegal and Viseryon free from their chains which was 2 episodes prior to her unleashing her anger on the khals.

Tyrion freeing them from their chains is interesting on a symbolic level and as foreshadowing as well, as in season 07, Tyrion’s bad decision making is what provokes Dany’s anger more and more, progressively awakening her inner dragon.

That’s when another comes in to help keep it in check once again: Jon.

From mid-season 07 until the end of s08e04, Jon is the one to act as Dany’s chains/Dragonpit.

However, s05 Dany, Jorah, Barristan, Tyrion, Varys and Jon all forgot something important:

You are damn right, Jorah. No one can tame Dany’s inner dragon, not even herself. (Sorry about the typo in the picture, I got it elsewhere, I’m too lazy to make my own).

And they forgot this:

Interesting we got reminded of that at the Dragonpit meeting. I think we heard that one before, didn’t we?

Hey, look! Drogon is in chains…Kraznys is at the other end of the chains, thinking he is in charge. But Dany is actually the one holding the whip in that scene. She is the master, the one with power. And hey, Kraznys even calls Drogon “a beast”. Doesn’t that remind us of something?

I’m not saying Jon is Kraznys, I’m just pointing the fact they both see dragons as beasts and both think dragons can be controlled, bound to their will, or in other words, chained to them. In Kraznys’ case, it was an actual dragon, in Jon’s case, it was Dany. Kraznys fell into Dany’s trap, failed in controlling Drogon and Dany unleashed her anger on Astapor. 

In s07e06, we also have this:

Another dragon in chains! I’m starting to think now that this ridiculous scene had a symbolic purpose. The only one who could actually bind a dragon to his will is the Night King. And it makes sense, doesn’t it? After all, Dany bound her dragons to herself with blood magic and the NK bound Viseryon to himself with his magic. Only Dany’s Ice counterpart to her Fire could do it. No one else.

Let’s have a look at another moment at the Dragonpit. This is what Jon told Cersei when he refused her conditions:

“I am true to my word, or I try to be. That is why I cannot give you what you ask. I cannot serve two queens. And I have already pledged myself to Daenerys of House Targaryen.”

And this was his speech when Tyrion told him he should have lied: “I’m not gonna swear an oath I can’t uphold. Talk about my father if you want, tell me that’s the attitude that got him killed, but when enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies, and lies won’t help us in this fight.”

What does that have to do with anything? will you ask in a Sansa fashion. Well, the interesting thing about Jon’s speech on promises and lies is the chain on the floor while he does it.

The chain looks like this after Jon kills the wight:

Then, just before he starts his speech about oaths, promises and lies, it looks like this:

The chain has been rearranged on the floor by the staff, as we can see that on the second picture it is further away from the wight’s remains than on the first picture. Also, its spiral shape looks better. It is supposed to mean something.

Jon steps inside the spiral shaped chain right before his speech about promises and lies. The photo below is taken after he’s finished though:

What does it mean then?

The first meaning I spoke about was the obvious one, Jon is still chained/tied to his mission, as the wight’s remains at the end of the chain show us. Which leads him to:

Fall into a trap he creates for himself. 

When he “bent the knee, but” on the boat, he lied to Daenerys, or, as Tyrion put it so well in s07e03 (when he convinces Dany to let Jon mine the dragonglass), he gave her “something by giving her nothing”. However, at the Dragonpit, Cersei puts him on the spot, and he has to cover up for his previous lie and assure Dany of his loyalty to her. By pledging himself and the North to her in front of everyone, he is swearing an oath he cannot back out of. Even less after talking about upholding oaths and words meaning nothing when false promises are made. Those very words chain him to his public pledge to Dany. That’s what the chains are showing us, Jon, in season 08, feels he has no choice but to be true to his word, it is a matter of honour. This, in turn, leads him to:

engage himself in a spiral of lies and events (spiral shape) he won’t be able to get out of (chains). The only thing that finally frees him of this spiralling is her death.

He thought he could bind her to his will, control her. Instead, he got himself in chains, like the shot below shows:

Jon is inside the spiral while Dany stands at the other end of the chain. Dany, like in the scene with Kraznys, is actually the master, the one in charge. Jon, through his decision to pledge himself to her, has made himself her prisoner. We can say that from the moment he stepped foot on Dragonstone until the moment he killed her, he never ceased being her prisoner. Sansa was right, by going to Dragonstone, Jon walked into a trap. Not only the one he created for himself at the Dragonpit, but also the one Tyrion had set up for him when he invited him to Dragonstone without mentioning he had to bend the knee. 

Anyway, he walked into a trap, then failed in controlling Dany’s inner dragon, and she unleashed her anger on King’s Landing. Just like in the scene with Kraznys really.  It’s worth pointing that Dany is standing in KL (a city she will destroy) when she repeats the same words she told Kraznys in Astapor (a city she destroyed). She freed the people of Astapor, and later on, she “freed” the people of KL (albeit in a tiny bit extreme way). It looks like a kind of echo to me.

For those who would like to say that Jon becomes the dragon in chains, I will say no no no. Jon’s personality has nothing to do with Targaryen mentality, he is a Stark through and through!

Well… except maybe for… falling for his sister? Alright, alright, maybe he is the chained dragon here, but just a little bit, okay? Let’s say he is a winged wolf in chains, yes?

Seriously though, I wonder if, by showing us the two scenes displaying chains in season 07, they weren’t trying to draw a parallel between Viseryon the dragon being bound to the Night King’s will (Ice), and Jon the dragon being bound to Dany’s will (Fire). Without Viseryon nor Jon having a real choice in it either. 

One other thing that I feel foreshadows Jon’s fate in season 08. Before the Dragonpit meeting, Tyrion says: “but in the beginning, when it was home to Balerion the Dread, it must have been the most dangerous place in the world”. Jon in season 08, acts as Dany’s illusory dragonpit/chains, he prevents her from doing damage as best as he can. But she sees him as a threat and he is afraid of her which is understandable, as being too close to a locked and/or chained dragon is still a dangerous position to be in:

It’s interesting to see that the Dragonpit, which is the place where Jon sealed his fate, is a ruin. Jon, who is Dany’s last metaphorical Dragonpit, ends up broken. A dangerous position to be in indeed. 

Am I going too far here?

To conclude this thing, I’d like to mention another scene in that same episode that foreshadows as well Jon’s fate as a prisoner of Dany’s. It is the one with Theon. 

Theon mentions his time as a prisoner of Ramsay’s and how Yara, his sister, was the only one to try and save him. In season 08, Sansa is the only one who tries, in a desperate move, to save Jon, by telling Tyrion his secret. Most importantly, she goes to KL with an army to try and free him at the very end, while he is still a prisoner (but of Grey Worm’s now. Geeez, poor Jon…). The parallel can even go on, as Yara failed in freeing Theon and bringing him back home, and Sansa, although she manages to free Jon, fails in bringing him back home too. Jon is a broken man, Theon was a broken man. In season 08, Theon chooses love for the Starks and Sansa over duty to Yara, his Queen. Jon at the end chooses love for Sansa over duty to Daenerys, his Queen. 

Anyway, those were my latest messy ramblings and that’s all for now.

Thanks for reading!

#political! jon #redeeming jon snow #Jon Snow #got #got s07 #got s08 #Jon is Dany's prisoner #anti daenerys

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Notice Me

Dr. Spencer Reid x Reader

Words: 3843

Summary: A killer leaves Reid’s girlfriend on the steps of the BAU with a message for Hotchner and the team. Spencer’s judgement is clouded and it seems that the killer isn’t finished with you. 

Notes: This is a dark one guys, so please be wary of that. I wanted to do an imagine that kinda felt like a case, but also had the reader involved and everything. This is another one that I needed to split into two parts because I got a little carried away (whoops). As always, please let me know what you think!

Warnings: Trauma, gore, assault, mentions of rape and sexual assault. 

Find Reid and more crime drama imagines: HERE

-

It was late. Later than anyone should have still been at the office and yet J.J. sat in front of a pile of files on her desk. Of course, Hotch was in his office too, both having already tried to convince the other to go home. Feeling like the piles would never end, J.J.’s attention shifted from a case to the flicker of movement just outside her door. At first, the figure standing by Spence’s desk startled her, but she quickly realized that it was you. 

“Y/N?” She smiled to greet you, though her confusion was clear. 

“Agent Jareau, I didn’t know you’d be here.” It was dark, so she couldn’t quite see how strained your smile really was. 

“Please, call me J.J.” She said lightly. Ever since you’d started seeing Dr. Reid, she liked to think the two of you had become friends. You liked to think that too, which was why you had hoped she wouldn’t be here. “Spence went home a couple of hours ago.”

“Is SSA Hotchner here?” You blurted. You didn’t have much longer. Her brows furrowed. 

“Um, yeah. He basically lives here, unfortunately.” She couldn’t get another word in before you rushed past her towards Hotch’s office. It wasn’t until then that she saw how pale you looked. 

It took every ounce of strength you had not to stumble as you walked. You kept your coat closed, partially out of embarrassment and partially because you were afraid that, even now, he was watching. Hotchner was working at his desk, just like he’d predicted. You had to knock to get him to look up. 

“Agent Hotchner?” 

“Dr. Y/L/N,” He set down the notes he was looking over and stared at you with surprise. “What can I help you with?” 

“I know it’s late, but he told me I had to find you.” You leaned against one of his chairs for support. 

“Reid sent you here?” 

“No. Spencer doesn’t know I’m here. He doesn’t know anything.” You winced at the thought. Spencer had no idea. He was probably worried out of his mind. You were supposed to be at his place watching a movie. Everything had changed in the span of one evening. 

You felt something drip off of the tip of your finger. Hotchner’s eyes followed the dark liquid until it splattered on his carpet. 

“Y/N are you okay?” Hotch stood up, noticing the way you seemed to sway slightly. 

“He said I had to come here. If I didn’t, he said that whatever he did next would be my fault. He said he has a message for you.”

“Y/N, who said this?”

“I didn’t know what else to do.” You undid the button keeping your coat closed. It was getting harder to speak. “He said that this is for you. For all of you.” 

You let your coat fall off of your shoulders, revealing your bloody chest and arms. Hotch lunged towards you as you collapsed, finally succumbing to your injuries. 

“J.J. get an ambulance here now!” He screamed, desperately trying to catch you before you hit the ground. The blonde appeared in the doorway to see what was going on. 

“Oh my god.” She gasped, rushing to the nearest phone. 

Hotch’s stomach dropped, taking a closer look at the bloody gashes on your chest. Each slash was deliberately carved into the flesh, forming two words; Notice Me. 

“J.J.!” He called out again. She rushed back into the room. 

“The paramedics are on their way.” 

Hotchner’s panicked face looked up at her. 

“Call the team.”

“Y-yes sir.” Her eyes widened, taking in the entirety of your wounds. Hotch’s jaw clenched. 

“And J.J.”

“Sir?”

“Let me call Reid.” 

-

He checked his watch for the hundredth time and blew out a long breath. On the table in front of him sat the box. The box. The box that had the potential to change absolutely everything. And you weren’t here to open it. He looked at his phone for missed messages, but the last text still read ‘On my way. See you soon.’ 

Spencer nearly jumped out of his chair when his phone suddenly started to ring. He felt his body tense when he saw the number. 

“Hotch?” He answered. Part of him already knew. 

“Reid…” Hotch sighed. “Spencer, you need to get down to the hospital.” Reid closed his eyes, hoping that he was wrong. 

“It’s her, isn’t it?” 

“Something’s happened.”

“I should have known. I should have looked for her. She’s never late, Hotch. Ever. She’s actually early for pretty much everything. I should have had Garcia track her phone or have her-” In his ranting, he forgot to breathe. 

“Reid, I need you to calm down.” Hotchner instructed. He listened to Spencer take a few deep breaths. 

“Is she…”

“The doctor said that she’s lost a lot of blood, but she’s going to be okay.” He paused, making Spencer even more panicked. “Unfortunately, that’s not all we have to worry about. I’ll be able to explain more when you get here. The team is on their way.”

“Wait, the team is coming?” The turning in his stomach got worse. There’s only one reason Hotch would have called in the team. 

“Like I said, I’ll explain when you get here.” 

“Hotch-”

“I’ll see you soon.” Hotch wanted to be supportive, but they were on a time crunch now. This message meant there would be more bodies and soon. 

It took a moment for Spencer to make his feet move. Once he did, he was running. Before he knew it, he was already outside and what he saw made him stop in his tracks. Parked in front of him was your car. Five feet and you would have been inside. 

-

Morgan was the first to meet him. Normally, Spencer would have found his presence comforting, but he knew that he wasn’t just here for support. Hotchner called the team in for a reason. By the look on his face, Morgan already had an idea. 

“What happened?” Reid demanded, trying to look over his shoulder. He tried to push passed him, but Morgan held him in place. 

“We don’t know a lot. But Reid, you’re going to want to prepare yourself.”

“I don’t need a pep talk, I need to see Y/N.” His attempts to dodge around him were unsuccessful.

“He carved a message into her chest with a knife, Reid.” Morgan sighed. Spencer stopped. 

“What?” 

“Come on, Hotch can tell you more than I can.” He led Reid back to a waiting area where a few other members of the team had gathered. Rossi was still on his way, and so was Prentiss., but Garcia, J.J., and Hotch were grouped together in the far corner. Garcia and J.J. were looking at something on her computer while Hotch sat with his eyes closed. 

He was trying to remember every last detail from when you walked in to when you collapsed. He knew something was wrong and he should have acted sooner. He analyzed every single word that you said, trying to piece everything together. 

“He said that this is for you. For all of you.”

Notice me. 

“Hotch.” Morgan called to get his attention. Everybody looked up and saw that he was joined by Reid. 

“Oh my god.” Penelope immediately stood and rushed over to them. She had definitely been crying. Spencer had forgotten that the two of you were friends. You were friends with the whole team, really. She enveloped Spencer in a tight hug. “When J.J. called, I couldn’t believe it.” She took a deep breath to compose herself. “We are going to figure this out and everything is going to be okay.” 

“Babygirl, let the kid breathe.” Morgan gently pulled her way from him. Spencer just stared off into nothing. 

“Her car is outside my apartment building.” He said blankly. “She was coming over to watch…” His gaze fell to the floor. “She was there. She was at my apartment and he took her.” 

“Spence, this isn’t your fault.” J.J. put a hand on his shoulder. “You couldn’t have known that he was out there.” 

Before he could respond, Garcia’s computer made a sound. She seemed almost afraid to look. When she did, her face dropped. 

“Is there a pattern?” Hotch sighed. She nodded, trying to keep calm. 

“Four bodies have been found in Maryland and Virginia. All of them were bound with duct tape, their necks were slashed and they were all raped.” She could barely say all of it without getting sick. She looked up at Spencer frantically. “But none of them had any messages or anything like that so maybe this isn’t the same guy. If it was the same guy, why would he…”

“Why would he leave her alive.” Spencer finished, closing his eyes. He couldn’t stop his brain from picturing every scenario, manifesting every scream. 

“I’m going to go see if the doctors can tell us anything.” J.J. said, giving Spencer a reassuring look. Reid finally looked at Hotch. He couldn’t help but stare at the blood that stained the front of his superior’s shirt. 

“What happened?” He didn’t think anything could be worse than what he already imagined. Hotch motioned for him to have a seat. 

“Whoever did this wanted to send us all a message. He told her that if she didn’t get to my office, that whatever he did afterwards would be her fault. He wanted to make sure I saw what he did.” 

“Morgan said that he-” Spencer took a sharp breath but was able to keep calm, distracting himself by picking at his nails. “He said that she had something carved into her chest?”

“Like I said, he wanted to make sure that I saw.” Hotch sighed. “He wrote ‘Notice Me’.” Everyone fell silent, each trying to wrap their heads around the situation. 

“Hotch,” J.J. returned, her expression betraying her concern, “She said she’s ready for questions.”

“Can you handle it?” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I should stay here and look over the cases Garcia found.” 

“Of course.” J.J. paused before looking at Spencer. “She said she would like you to be there, Spence.” 

“O-okay.” He rose slowly, his nerves barely allowing him to move. Morgan gave him a supportive pat on the back before Spencer followed J.J. to your room. Every step he took made his heart pound harder. He’d heard countless statements from victims, analyzed the most gruesome crime scenes imaginable, but he had never been this paralyzed before. 

The two agents opened the door to find you struggling out of the hospital bed while a nurse tried to get you to lay back down. 

“I appreciate everything, really, but I’m not going to sit here all night. I need to find-” Your argument with your nurse quickly came to a halt. “Spencer.” 

“The doctor said you were ready to answer a couple of questions.” J.J. gave you a small smile, pulling a chair up next to your bed. “He told me you wanted Spencer with you.” She looked back at Reid, who was still standing in the doorway. 

He just stood there and stared. Your face was bruised and a bandage covered an injury on your forehead- probably the blow that your attacker used to overtake you. Bandages covered your arms and he could see more under the collar of the hospital gown. You were shaking, the color from your skin faded and cold. Seeing him made your eyes water. 

“Spencer, I-”

“You were late.” He blurted. He started to fidget with his nails. “I mean, I thought you were late. Even though you are never late for anything. You didn’t call or text me or anything and I still didn’t look for you. I should have looked for you. I-” His words caught in his throat. 

You shrugged off the nurses hands and walked towards him, trying not to wince as you raised a hand to rest on his cheek. He had tears in his eyes and you could tell he was desperately trying to keep them back. 

“Spencer, this isn’t your fault.” You said softly. He leaned into your touch and closed his eyes, trying to stop imagining what happened in that goddamn hour that that man would have had you. 

“Dr. Y/L/N, you really need to be laying down.” The nurse insisted. Spencer opened his eyes and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead. 

“She’s right. Come on.” He took your hand and led you back to the bed, helping to tuck you in under the blanket. He sat in a chair across from J.J. and kept your hand in his. 

“Are you ready?” J.J. asked patiently. You nodded nervously. J.J. smiled reassuringly. “If you want to stop at any point, just let me know, okay?” 

“Okay.” 

“What were you doing before you were attacked?” 

“I was driving to Spencer’s apartment.to watch a movie and have dinner.” You glanced over at your boyfriend. “I parked in front and walked towards the door, but I didn’t get there.” 

“Were there cars already parked when you got there?” 

“I-I think so.” You closed your eyes, trying to envision the scene, but all you could see was his face and with his face came the pain and the terror. “Oh god, I see him.”

“Stay with me, Y/N.” J.J. kept her voice as calm as possible when inside her heart was breaking for you and for the anguished Reid across from her. “Do you remember the cars?” 

“Breathe with me, Y/N.” Spence instructed, kissing the palm of your hand. You calmed down enough and focused on the sound of his voice. “Breathe in. Breathe out.” You exhaled slowly and nodded. 

“There was a van.” 

“What color was it?”

“It was dark, but not black. Blue maybe? I don’t know, I only saw it for a second.” 

“That’s okay.” J.J. said. She exchanged a look with Spencer. Now came the hard part. “What did you do when you got out of your car? Did you see anyone?”

“No, it was just me. I walked towards the door, but something hit me. Someone was dragging me away from the door. The next thing I knew, I was in a van.” 

“Do you see anything?”

“There’s something on the walls. Some kind of padding. A-and on the back of the seat, there’s this jacket. A  women’s jacket. It was red.”

“What else can you see?”

“I see him.” A tear escaped your eye and fell silently down your cheek. “He-he’s leaning over me and he’s-” You paused and listened to the sound of Spencer’s breathing. You wanted to open your eyes and look at him. You wanted to see his face instead of the creature that did this to you. But you needed to do this. “He’s unbuttoning my shirt.” 

“Do you remember feeling the van move at all before he did this?” 

“No. No, he didn’t drive until after.” You felt Spence’s grip on your hand tighten. J.J. watched him carefully, reading the pain on his face. “He said something while he was taking it off. He said he ‘didn’t have enough time’ and he ‘couldn’t do it now.’ He said he wanted it to be special. That I was special.” 

“Was he wearing a mask or a hood?”

“No, I could see his face. That face…” You held back a cry. Spencer held back the urge to wrap his arms around you. “That’s when he took out the knife and started carving this.” You put a hand on your chest. “He said I was his messenger.” Your heart was starting to race and you started to hyperventilate. “He… he kissed each cut as he made them and then he would kiss me.” 

You finally opened your eyes and almost wished that you hadn’t. Spencer was crushed. There were tears on his face and utter horror in his eyes. You had to look away. 

“Well… you know the rest.” 

“You did great, Y/N.” J.J. reassured you. “Do you think you’d be able to give a description to a sketch artist?” Despite your efforts to keep it still, your lip started to tremble. 

“D-do you think I can sleep first? I’m so tired.” You hadn’t realized how exhausted you were until now.  

“Of course. Just let me know whenever you’re ready, okay?” She glanced over at Spencer with a supportive smile before she left to join the others in the waiting room. You couldn’t bear to look at the pain you had caused him. 

“Maybe you should go with her.” You muttered, staring blankly at your lap, more tears threatening to spill onto your cheeks. You had brought him in here because you knew you needed him to get through this, but you hadn’t thought about what it would do to him. 

Spencer tried not to show the hurt on his face, but he wasn’t successful. He let go of your hand and stood up. 

“Let me know if you need anything.” His voice barely came out above a whisper. Any louder and he was sure it would have cracked. You watched the way his shoulders sagged as he walked, like he was carrying the weight of what had happened over his shoulder. You grabbed his hand before he got far. 

“Spence, wait.” You motioned for him to come closer and held his hand against your heart. When his skin grazed against the cuts in your chest, it didn’t hurt. If anything, it eased the sting. “I love you.” 

A small, lopsided smile appeared on his lips. Suddenly the box in his jacket pocket weighed more. 

“I love you too.” 

-

Once Rossi and Prentiss arrived, Hotchner briefed the team on what their next step should be. Reid, however, was nowhere to be found, which had made everybody worry. He sent Morgan and Prentiss to the latest murder crime scene to see if this really was the same unsub. Garcia went back to the BAU, but Rossi and J.J. stayed 

“Do you think she’ll be okay?” Rossi asked, setting down a cup of terrible hospital coffee. It was almost morning now and no one had gotten any sleep. 

“From what she told us, it isn’t over yet.” J.J. sighed. “He told her that she’s special. He’s going to come back for her.” 

“And we will be here when he does.” Hotch stared down at the array of photos from the previous crime scenes. He was usually good about separating his emotions from a case, but this was an attack against his team. This was made to be personal. 

Hotch started down the hall, turning the corner and stopping. He noticed movement in the corner of his eye and turned around. Reid sat on the floor with his back pressed against the side of a vending machine and legs crossed in front of him. His face was sullen and tear stained.

“Hey,” He greeted, immediately stiffening and whipping his face with his sleeve. He stood and brushed off. Hotch noticed the way his hands shook. “Have you guys found anything yet?” 

“Morgan and Prentiss are heading to the latest crime scene. Based on what Y/N told you and J.J. about the attack, it could be the same unsub, but we don’t want to make any conclusions yet.” 

Reid nodded quickly, keeping his gaze trained on the floor. 

“Maybe I should go with them. I might get a better-”

“This isn’t your fault, Reid.” Hotch interrupted. He knew exactly where the younger agent’s mind was. “That is what he wants you to believe, but it isn’t your fault.” 

“I…” Spencer knew that arguing with him was pointless. He just looked defeated. “I have to do something, Hotch.” 

“The doctors will likely release Y/N in a couple of hours. We’ll need to get her somewhere safe. You should stay with her.” Hotch knew how the guilt was weighing down on him. He put a hand on his shoulder. “We’re all here for you, Reid. You and Y/N. We aren’t going to stop until we catch this man.” 

“Thanks, Hotch.” Spencer sniffed. More than anything, he wanted to take you home and never let you leave his embrace. Reid leaned down to pick up his jacket from the floor, wincing when a small velvet box clattered to the tile. Hotch picked it up for him. 

“Reid…” He proceeded with caution, but there was a warmhearted tone in his voice. “Is what I think it is?” He handed it to Spencer who hurriedly stuffed it back into his pocket. 

“Actually it’s a-” He stopped and gave him his awkward lop-sided smile. “I was going to ask her tonight.”

“I didn’t know you were ready to take that step.” 

“Neither did I.” Spencer laughed nervously. “But ever since I met her, I just knew. I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.” He put his hand in his pocket, feeling the box in his fingers. Tonight was supposed to be so different. Hotch’s usually serious expression broke into a small, proud smile. 

Hotch’s mind returned to the case and he started back down the hallway. Spencer walked towards your room, pausing when his phone rang. 

���Dr. Reid.” He answered. For a moment, there was just breathing on the other end. Before he hung up, a low, raspy voice spoke. 

“I won’t be ignored anymore, Dr. Reid. You all notice me now.” 

Reid took off running. He found Garcia in the waiting area and pointed urgently at his cell phone before continuing the call. 

“You’re right. You have our full attention.”

“I know that little trick. Make me think I’m in control so your pretty little tech can trace this call. I learned from the best.” He chuckled deeply. “You won’t find me until I want you to.” There was a brief pause, like he was stopping for effect. “I was just calling to ask you some questions, Dr. Reid.”

“I’m not nearly as interesting as you are.” Reid tried to keep his tone even as he watched Garcia scramble to trace the call. 

“Could you hear her screaming?” His voice was like nails on a chalkboard. “I want to make sure that those soundproofing panels worked. She kept calling out for you over and over and over…” 

“You want us to know who you are, why don’t you tell me your name?” 

“Tell me, have you had her yet, Dr. Reid?” His suggestive voice made Spencer’s blood boil. “I’m dying to know what it’s going to be like when I have enough time with Y/N.” 

“You won’t get that chance.” He finally spat, losing control. 

“Don’t worry. I’ll take better care of her than I did those other girls. I look forward to meeting you, Spencer.” Just like that, the line went dead.

-

General Tag: @rae-gar-targaryen; @takemepedropascal; @childhood-imagination;  @mylovegoesto; @yellowbadgergirl; @itmejado; @suckmyapplejacks

#dr. spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #aaron hotchner #criminal minds imagines #jennifer jereau #criminal minds #crime show #Matthew Grey Gubler

[scribbly-dee]

Inspired by this post

I adore corruption arcs, so I graded how well the non-archivist characters would have damned humanity if they had been the archivist.

Sasha James 11/10, would be an ideal archivist, this plus her height is probably why the stranger monster targeted her before she could peak

I have a soft spot for any au that knows Sasha has never seen a brain cell in her life and that any unhinged!Sasha au is really just a regular Sasha au. Picture it with me. Sasha and Jon have parallel archivist tracks, until Sasha (my beloved show off) decides: you know what would make me more efficient at snooping? Becoming a Human Google. And things accelerate. The Web doesn't even need to bother with subtly magic lighters, it slaps all 14 marks on her at once by pulling up next to Sasha in a windowless van with "free secrets 👍" written on the side.

After the Unknowing, Sasha takes over the institute from Elias instead of Martin and Peter. With Tim dead, Jon in a coma, Martin lonely-snatched, Melanie compulsively homicidal, Daisy in the coffin, and Basira on autopilot, she quickly bonds with Rosie, the ultimate nosiness enabler. Sasha is a fully marked archivist for a good long while, but doesn't start the apocalypse right away because she's eager to read ALL the ominous notes Elias left, so the watcher's crown statement is in her to-be-read pile. When the apocalypse starts (Rosie: "Hey, Sasha, I just read something extra fucked up that Elias wrote, wanna see?" Sasha: "God yes."), she books it to become the pupil with Rosie as her anchor. Mayhapse an anchor-archivist polycule with Archivist Jon and Martin? Mayhapse Jon is just a normal eye avatar here and deeply invested in all of Sasha's eyepocalypse statements, so it's Sasha and her plus-three? Mayhapse it's a race across the eyepocalypse wasteland between Archivist Sasha and Archivist Jon to usurp Jonah and become the pupil?

Tim Stoker 2/10 dude's here for a good time, not a long time

The only way I see this working is if Elias disguises not-stranger clues as circus related so Tim is motivated to investigate. Otherwise, his archival assistants are way more curious than him and disobey his direct orders to 🍹chill🏝. Jon, Sasha, and Martin inadvertently bring marks home to him like cats bring home dead birds. He asserts his agency when he decides the best course of action? Actually? Just blow up the archives. This unfortunately puts him in a false sense of security, and Elias makes him read the watcher's crown statement by cat fishing him on grindr and sending the ritual as a dm mid conversation.

Daisy Tonner - 9/10 archivist, would have started doomsday before she was at the archivist job long enough to use her PTO

Daisy already had a lot of experience hunting down fear-entity-related people in sectioned cases, which means she possibly canonically already has all the marks from just hunting avatars who use their powers in self defense. The reason she lost one point is because she's too much of a jock to read, only nerds are culpable to watcher crown statements, so this would be the only delay but oh what a delay it will be.

Melanie King - 7/10 archivist, points awarded for achieving her breakthroughs by smashing her head against a wall until she literally breaks through, points deducted for doing so in full clown makeup.

If Jon got a handful of marks by just asking anoying questions in the same room as an avatar, imagine how much faster Melanie would get marks by bringing her trademark Chaotic Brat personality on fear entity investigations. The apocalypse would have started in like two seasons: one season to hire her off the streets and establish shakey, complex relationships with her new assistants (Jon and Sasha put in the time with the institute but were passed over on this promotion for some random YouTuber (plus they're tighter with Tim and Martin, so proletarian solidarity against the boss)).

Then a second season to stab every mark and get stabbed in return. Melanie would blitz through all 14 marks because what precious little impulse control she starts with is slowly replaced with slaughter juice. One fun moral ambiguity to explore could be if Melanie tries to use her new, dangerous Eye/Slaughter powers to revive her reputation and platform in the supernatural community now that she can, ya know, identify supernatural things for the first time ever. Does she acknowledge her entire career up to her hospital episode apparently only investigated fake sightings? A better question to ask is whether Basira, Tim, and Jon ever let her live down how Ghost Hunt UK's professional dignity was contingent on the legitimacy of her sCiEnTiFiC gHoSt eQuIpMeNt in those episodes, so the temperature spikes set to dramatic music were well and truly just temperature spikes and dramatic music. Sasha found a clip of that music playing as Melanie narrates "it's a message... from the other side..." and made it as her text tone.

Also, it would be hilarious if Melanie tried to kill Jonah on sight in the panopticon, once again botched assassination attempt number 1,963,538, and then Jon quietly snuck in to finish the job on his first try just like in canon.

Jon: "What, like it's hard?"

Basira Hussain 3/10 archivist, her eye alignment manifests as office gossip, like a normal person

Basira has the most formidable super power of all: the power to nope tf out of any conversation or plan she wants. She therefore would probably take 10x longer to start the apocalypse than any other archivist because her fatal flaw is refusal to directly engage with a lot of personally difficult things (like the slaughter bullet surgery she organized, Daisy In General, etc). The marks will be slow going if she resists putting her safety on the line or invests time in making good plans (which is smart, but unhelpful for dooming humanity). She would for sure still get marked and end the world because once she's convinced of a plan (aka Elias convinces her of a plan), she's ruthlessly efficient. So I'd stay out of her way that last year or two, she marks the entities right back at them.

Martin Blackwood 2/10 archivist, considering a prerequisite for creepy eye avatar staring is the ability to make eye contact.

S1 Archivist Martin would probably dote too much on the employees under him to be hugely susceptible to Elias' isolation-dependant manipulation. Any progress Martin inadvertently achieves toward the watcher's crown goal would have to be contingent on it helping his loved ones, which is perfect fuel for a "corrupted by good intentions" arc. This would be key because Martin has superb bullshit and manipulation detection, making the marks are tricky but not impossible to orchistrate considering Jon can't stay put in a safe corner for 10 minutes and Martin's mother would refuse to stay with him where she's safe from avatar threats.

Imagine the petty drama when Jon and Sasha learn he got the promotion they wanted because he lied on his CV.

Other than that, Martin would be even worse about pit stops on the apocalypse road trip than Jon because his Kill Bill mode would have no off switch. Does Archivist!Martin and his anchor Jon ever reach the panopticon? Eventually, but not until after they lose points for significantly reducing the apocalypse fear quantity. Would Annabelle survive to deliver her cryptic MaCHiNAtIoNs and achieve the Web's goal? Hard No, additional point reduction for neutralizing the multiverse invasion. Points potentially earned back if Martin's Web connection is strong enough to come up with the multiverse invasion plan on his own, though.

Georgie Barker 4/10, as a fearless coward, all the fear she feeds to the entities would be khaki flavored. They'd get their apocalypse, but they probably wouldn't enjoy the meal.

Similar to Basira, Georgie has the super power to Fuck This Shit I'm Out. She would overall be a subpar humanity damning archivist; a major archivist success factor of Jon's is that he has enough affective empathy to be afraid with every statement giver he reads, so when Jon archives a statement, he unintentionally contributes to the fear soup seasoning. Combined with how Georgie doesn't want anything to do with entity drama, so any corruption specific to the watcher's crown would stagnate. Even her casual exposition conversations would go like

Georgie: "I've connected no dots."

Melanie: "you've connected a lot of dots??"

Georgie: "I've connected shit all dots."

The reason she gets one more point than Basira is because Georgie's fatal flaw is the passive observer quality the Eye tried to stoke in Jon. Her level of engagement oscillates between two extremes, impulsive over commitment and judging from a distance. This would probably lead her to geting involved just long enough for her involvement to become irreversible, at which point she would try to cut that shit out of her life after it's trapped her. She'd linger, barricading herself on the margins of this problem as the marks that are targeted at her slowly tally up until boom. Apocalypse is on and she only half understands what's happening.

Georgie would wander around an apocalypse hellscape confused, but vibes and physical health fully intact. Anchor!Melanie would have quite the emotional journey starting with Georgie on that pedestal Melanie placed her, and ending with a slaughter avatar stabbing the person who convinced her to work on her slaughter inclination.

#the magnus archives #tma #jonathan sims #jon sims #martin blackwood #basira hussain #daisy tonner #melanie king #Georgie Barker #Tim Stoker #sasha james

[in-tua-deep]

Ok I totally want to hear more about this survivors au/Delores is real! How do the siblings handle having this different version of Five? Five may be better adjusted but he still has to heard his family around like a bunch of stray cats. What happens when Hazel and Cha Cha show up? How do they find out that Vanya causes the apocalypse and how does Five handle that revelation?!

here is the thing, i think the survivors au has the potential to be HILARIOUS

no one knows how to handle a well-adjusted five, and this absolutely includes the commission

So you mentioned Hazel and Cha-Cha?? Five in this au was not nearly as absolutely feral as he is in the show bc he knows how to interact with people - he was raised by a competent adult and a weird best friend and they occasionally saw other survivors as well

please picture old Five hanging around the water cooler and chatting with Hazel

the other funny thing is that Five is competent passing - he is well adjusted emotionally but functionally?? Hazel is out there complaining about dental being cut and office parties and budgets and Five is there sipping his drink having never filed taxes in his life. Five doesn't know what the fuck a dental plan is, he was a child soldier and then lived in an apocalypse.

So please picture for me Hazel being like "okay I know corporate wants us to keep what we're being paid to ourselves but fuck that, workers unite, what do you get paid as a legend old timer?"

and five is like "you're getting paid? i get to not get tossed back into the apocalypse, I think"

"but what about expense forms? what about medical care?"

"I'm like 80% sure i'm being experimented on, actually." Five says nonchalantly, "Don't get me wrong, my idea of medical care is fucked by being a child soldier but I'm pretty sure regular people don't have electrodes attached to their heads every time they get a checkup. Could be wrong though! My ex-dad used to monitor my brainwaves while I slept so like, my idea of appropriate shit is fucked, you know?"

This is a Five who was raised by Rick, he is polite to his coworkers. If Dot asked him if he wanted to grab lunch, Five would have gone and grabbed lunch with her or politely said that he couldn't.

Cha Cha only ever talks to Five when she wants to talk shop, so they've had a couple of conversations about weapons but not much else tbh, Hazel just tends to be more personable

So when they're sent after Five, Hazel is much more hesitant to kill who he perceives as a "work friend" and also is definitely thinking about all the times Five casually revealed a way the commission was being highkey shady about him, such as the potential experimentation, no pay, working under duress etc. He's much more easily turned against the commission because he's even more primed to say "fuck the commission" than he is in canon

Hazel out here like "how did Five break his contract when Five wasn't even being paid? I kind of want to read it."

Hazel out here like "I would unionize if I didn't think the commission was anti-union enough to send literal assassins after me if I suggested it :/"

meanwhile with the siblings

Five just. talks over them a lot and makes so much sense that it's actually really hard to argue with him, and he's weirdly considerate of his family's obligations

Like Diego is like "i have to go see Patch" then Five is like "that's great I'm proud of you buddy, it would actually be really handy to have some law enforcement read into the situation if you think she's up to the task. that goes for everyone by the way! If y'all have people you trust, more bodies would be super helpful I think"

the entire family, collectively, who have like zero trusted social links: uhhhhhhhh

Diego, with this weird permission, probably?? Does? Awkwardly attempt to read Patch into the situation? Patch is, obviously, like "what the fuck, Diego" but probably goes with him to the mansion (????????) because she's concerned and then meets his fucking whacko family with their superpowers and suddenly everything is 100% more realistic

Five is just like "yes hello I'm aware I look like a child, i'm actually in my late 50s or early 60s (apocalypse time amiright) because of time travel stuff. Yes I am Five Hargreeves who went missing in like 2002 or whatever. anyway it's lovely to meet you, i'm so glad diego has someone he trusts, and considering my sibling's shifty looks when i told them to invite anyone they trusted this genuinely makes me concerned that Diego is the most socially well-adjusted of them."

"That cannot be possible." Patch says, like someone who has met Diego Hargreeves.

"You haven't met the rest." Five says sympathetically, "In our defense we were raised in isolation as child soldiers."

"That... explains so much." Is all Patch can say to that, "But you seem..."

"I'm adopted." Five waves away.

"We're ALL adopted." Diego grits out, very aggrieved by this and also not sure if he likes the fact that Patch seems friendly with Five, or at least is listening to him?

"I'm double adopted."

However! With the recruitment of Patch, herding Diego becomes like 90% easier.

Honestly the worst to herd are probably Luther and Allison? Luther because he's Number One and resents Five taking charge and also resents Five's casual dismissal of Reginald and also suspects that Five (or at least the commission) has something to do with Reginald's death?

Allison because she is torn between following Luther and helping him and helping Five but also calling Patrick and Claire at every possible moment while ALSO trying to repair her relationship with Vanya. She's flighty - she'd bail on a Five-apocalypse-assignment if Vanya mentioned being hungry or if Luther called or anything like that

Vanya likes to be included and, if asked, would probably drop as many current obligations as she can. Like she would probably cancel her teaching if Five genuinely and sincerely asked her for her help, which he does because he's 100% sure Dolores would manifest in front of him and smack him if he dared even imply someone without powers wouldn't be helpful

Vanya is like "I'm not sure if i'll be helpful - I don't have powers ):" and Patch is like "wtf are you talking about - my superpowers are Gun, Backup, and Reading Comprehension and i am like the most useful member of this team right now"

Vanya gets a confidence boost just from hanging out with Patch honestly, I think they should be friends

Klaus is thrilled to be included are you kidding?? He says he does it for money but he's just happy to be there and also as one of the most emotionally intelligent siblings he is mildly concerned about the fact that Five looks like he's about to cry and also emotes

Five also gives Klaus positive reinforcement, hugs, and Five absolutely weaponizes the I'm not mad, but I believe that you can do better and I'm going to give you more chances because I love you and fully believe that next time you'll be amazing way that Rick used on him.

I feel like Five ends up saying something along the lines of "I understand that x is really important, and we're definitely going to look into it. Is it something that needs to be addressed right now, or is it something that can wait until after April 1st? If it can wait, I can write it down here on this list so we don't forget. If it can't wait then we can figure out a time to address it and help you" a lot

Like Grace malfunctioning and potentially killing Reginald?

"We don't have to make this decision right now." Five says patiently, "Because Grace is a robot, we have some options. Living with a robot who is potentially malfunctioning and homicidal is dangerous, but Luther saying that means admitting that Reginald might have made a mistake or error with Grace's programming or upkeep. I haven't been here for a long time, but I remember Reginald being very precise. Regardless, this isn't a choice between permanently shutting her off or not. We can shut her down temporarily until we can fully address the issue. We can ask and see if there is a 'system reboot' option or some sort of system check that Grace can undergo. We can try find and hire an expert to take a look at her programming to find the issue."

Five gives this speech while like, organizing the weaponry in the house on a table very nonchalantly

Five out here making buzzer noises at his siblings arguments like "yeah no that's a false dichotomy and a strawman's argument, want to try again?"

(Look apocalypse nights were long and they had games that were literally about arguing pointless shit like ranking types of chairs or the best way to break out of a prison without powers and things could get heated)

"Who died and made you boss?" Luther demands.

"Uh, the world? Were you not listening?" Five asks, looking very purposefully confused.

It gets even MORE delightful when Five reads Rick into the situation because a) he promised and b) his siblings really have like, no connections jeeze

Rick fully believes that this is his son from the future, like Five introduced himself, but Five skipped out on a few key details. Such as being adopted.

So Rick spends a solid chunk of time just staring at Five, who looks basically nothing like him, trying to think like, who is his mother ???? if we save the world will Five stop existing? why would I name my child 'Five'? Does everyone have powers in the future? was there like... a radioactive apocalypse? would radiation give future humans superpowers? when did my life turn into a comic book? am i even allowed to ask these questions? will knowledge of the future fuck things up?

and then when Five comes back and is like "what is up everyone this is my dad Rick who will be joining us, he doesn't have any memories of me thanks to time travel but if anyone is mean to him i WILL kneecap them"

"Your DAD?"

Five does kidney punch Klaus for saying that Rick is a DILF but otherwise everyone just is like, warily looking at this Normal Dad Man in confusion because?? This is the dude who raised Five, who they watched take out like an entire commission team by himself yesterday? He looks so. Normal.

Rick is very confused and like, wonders if he's supposed to be the team mascot? But Five keeps involving him and asking his opinion and in return Rick enforces snack breaks and makes everyone sandwiches and has gentle talks with everyone

Every time Five notices someone about to blow he just lovingly makes sure that that person is alone in a room with Rick

Luther ends up crying on the sofa with Rick gently patting his back as Rick calmly states that Luther seems like he's put a lot of time and effort into his family and making his father proud and that since Reginald isn't here to say it, Rick will have to be the one to say that he's proud and that they've been dropped into a difficult and stressful situation - so soon after Reginald's death when they're still grieving! - and he's doing so well

Luther, experiencing unconditional positive paternal regard for the first time in his life: i don't know why i'm crying so much

honestly this is just a comedy of juggling the gang, having impromptu therapy sessions and discussions, investigating the apocalypse and the eye, leonard trying to meet vanya continuously and failing because she's constantly surrounding by family or rick/patch, the commission trying their best to bust up the dream team/isolate Vanya/kill or remove Five, while Hazel lives out his romcom dreams with Agnes and also says "fuck the commission"

#HUH? #survivors au #well adjusted five au #long post #far tua long #five recruits rick to be team dad #rick is DEEPLY confused #but he's the kind of person that rolls with it #dolores probably ends up tagging along as well on at least one occasion #dolores and patch bond #five pretends that dolores is a new sibling and not his dolores #five calls rick 'dad' and it messes with everyone else #patch is on team fuck-the-apocalypse(-and-reginald) #vanya is never alone so fuck leonard #five finds out that vanya causes the apocalypse and is like #vanya: HUH? #luther: maybe we should lock vanya up - #rick: are there are any other possible actions that might be more appropriate in this situation? #vanya: i could try get more meds to take and we could address the powers thing after april 1st #vanya immediately gets validated that reginald sucks #even luther who has had multiple conversations with rick is like 'dad... didn't always make the best choices...' #everyone: :0 #hazel doesn't kill patch so he probably joins team anti-apocalypse at some point #hazel: why are you a child #five: oh you know i'm young at heart and all that #OH forgot to mention one of the main differences in this au is that five like properly grew up this time #so while he is inconvenienced by his body he's not so deeply uncomfortable or angry about it #just resigned #'this might as well happen' - five #five probably makes jokes about it as well