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#even if it means giving up the possibility of this new life that u are presenting to me.
silenthillbunni · 3 months
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📓🕯️🐇🖤pt.2
#only 30 tags lol i ran out... so furthermore#we only get one life. im gonna try as much as i can to enjoy the little moments. nd to not give up on myself nd my life#i will die one day anyway. why rush it. i'll enjoy as many books and as many walks and songs and tv shows as possible#if i get a loan nd have more money i wanna bleach my hair nd dye my hair green#and later this year i think i might change my name#it was the name i wanted to change to from the beginning. but i was in such a bad headspace i just picked eden at random#i do kinda like it now nd im attached to it but i more feel like this other name actually is me. my birth name nd my current name dont feel#really right. so maybe. i havent decided yet. like i rlly dont know. im also attached to this name for some other reason. like it's who i am#to a person i rlly like and if i change... will i be anything to them? i cant put it into words but that makes me hesitate#but it's unhealthy to stay attached to someone i cant truly have even if i want to. so i mean. idk im just weird abt it#but i do kinda wanna change my name (to embla. my mom wanted to give me that name but my dad was like nooo >.<) i am not 100% sure tho so#when i've been getting used to going to school nd working out at the gym. nd after my surgery nd i have more energy#i will try to face my avpd and try apps for making friends. there r two apps where u can find new girl friends!! maybe i can try that#also like i've never tried apps but i think maaaaaybe i can use bumble to try to find friends and women to date. potentially. idk.....#rn it's hard for me to think in those terms bc. i mean i am hung up on someone!!!! i cant evwn imagine dating or being intimate w anyone els#sometimes i feel like.. they're the only person i've ever felt like it'd even be possible. who i'd event want to do that w#not only physically but emotionally. so ig it's even harder to let go bc im so scared i will never feel like that w anyone else#but i rlly need to try to make the most of whatever life i have. the world will collapse soon anyway#that makes me even more sad that i cant be w who i wanna be w nd do what i wanna do but#all pain will all be completely descimated eventually. it's not forever bc life isnt forever#i've just never felt this before. like i want smth to be real so bad but if it happened once surely it can happen again? right?#i wont spend my life alone without intimacy and love and comfort nd support nd understanding right???? :o hope not#im still so sad nd exhausted rn. nothing in my life is working nd theres no repreive nd no help#it gets sooo hard to endure everything sometimes when everything just keeps piling up and gets so heavy it feels like im drowning#nd atm i dont feel like i have any anchor. nothing that keeps me grounded nd im just floating away nd im constantly being overwhelmed by my#feelings nd emotions. im like a stupid little kid who dont understand how to handle what im feeling. or make rational decisions#i feel so ... stupid and useless. i dont know what im doing. i have no idea. i have no compass. its so scary
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sovonight · 1 year
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#i wanted to find xan's epilogue slides so that i could talk about them and i failed but im talking abt them off my memory anyway#so: how is xan legally allowed to become charname's high priest when he still has the moonblade#like. that's corellon's thing. so what is the process of divorcing himself from that duty#previous conversations have emphasized that chances for him to be free of the moonblade are rare and difficult#so i assume charname as a new deity steps in and does that for him#but even if it's possible & easy: would xan give it up just like that? like he says multiple times that he hates the burden of the sword#but i keep thinking back to that 1 exchange abt secret names where xan explains his secret name literally means promised to the blade#and charname's like 'i prefer xan to your true name and i think so do you; it separates you from your moonblade'#and xan gets really quiet and he's like 'my name was a gift from my father. as was the moonblade' and the conversation instantly ends#like??? the blade is tied up in so much significance. is he really so ready to simp for goddess!charname that his filial piety disappears#like i know that immediately after u save him from bodhi he's like 'i will do whatever you want me to with my life'#and he's outright like 'if you want me to be your high priest when you ascend to godhood i'm 100% down'#but bro just for saving his life?? idk abt anyone else but i save his life on a daily basis. guy is always 2 hits away from death#maybe he's especially awed like 'wow charname took a potentially fatal blow for me' but my guy she does that every damn hour#she's a permanent member of the front line just to keep the aggro off of you. have some more appreciation for her everyday sacrifice#idk it's the way that he's been asking charname not to use her divine powers for 2 full games bc he fears it will consume her#and how he's been sighing longingly and going 'i wish we could have our wedding and a quiet life'#and then. suddenly. he's indifferent to / in full support of the goddess ending??#like my guy are you aware that you're going to have to share her?? that she'll have other champions besides you??#that you're never going to truly have her again? that the most you will have of her is her avatar and the visits she makes in your dreams#that you're abandoning the seldarine and might not get to see your parents in the afterlife ever??#i do love the full devotion thing. i do. but xan's brand of devotion has always come with an asterisk#his and charname's values have to align even Somewhat for his romance to even happen#so what is this? ''if you get far enough in his romance his values no longer matter''?#''feel free to choose whatever ending you want bc at this point he'll just indulge you and go along with it''?#sorry did i romance a fucking reed in the wind?? if i wanted someone that bends to any and all whims xan would be the last person i picked#he's all 'i can't say no to you' now and i'm like *slumps over my desk* i miss when he was contrary about everything#the 'cant say no' thing is even worse if in the underdark you--no i wont get into it#sovo note
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hannieehaee · 4 months
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hi! i hope u are doingg greattt! can u please do a wonwoo fic about when u get into an accident while ur husband!wonwoo was on a tour????????plzzzz do this fic and a happy endingg plzzzz
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content: husband!wonwoo, idol!wonwoo, established relationship, gender neutral reader, angst, mentions of an accident, mentions of hospital, (tw for car accident implications), fluff, happy ending, etc.
wc: 1188
a/n: thank u for requesting!! sorry i took a lil while to get to it T-T
masterlist
wonwoo had never felt such fear in his life. i mean, how else was he supposed to react to such an unpredictable situation?
last he had spoken to you had been only three hours ago. on the phone. he had bid you goodbye for the night, letting you know he was about to go on stage and that he'd call you the next morning due to your time differences. he knew you'd be going home from work and head straight to sleep, so he didnt want you to feel like you had to wait up for him as he finished his never-ending setlist.
the next thing he knew, he was walking into the backstage area once more, exhausted but ready to head back to the hotel. except his plans had been interrupted by his manager, who pulled him aside to give him the grim news.
you had gotten on an accident on your way home. there were no more details at the moment. something about your best friend calling wonwoo from the hospital, but his manager had picked up, not understanding much from your friend's frantic rambles. wonwoo's heart immediately dropped at the implication. an accident could mean anything. it had happened on your way home, so that couldve implied a car accident .. wonwoo couldnt breathe anymore. the more he thought, the more his heart raced. his breath became heavy at the bare thought of you scared and alone while at home, not having your husband by your side.
he had been having fun on stage with his best friends while you had gotten hurt. there was no way for him to forgive himself for not being with you right now. he called your phone over and over as he ran to his assigned car, not even caring to change out of his concert ensemble. in the meantime he had his manager book him a flight to you immediately, not giving a second thought to any repercussions to his absence.
it took him a while to receive a response from you, or well, your best friend. she had called from your phone, letting him in on more details of your accident. wonwoo couldnt help but let out a sigh of relief at the news. you were okay. you were alive. you had swerved too harshly in order to avoid a deer that had gotten in your way, which caused the car to crash against a tree. the hood of the car was destroyed beyond reparation, but you had been left injured, but almost unscathed past a few broken bones. it was a broken arm, a broken collarbone, and a few scratches (re: a ton), but it was manageable. he would still dote to you until you healed, but he was just extremely content that you were okay.
regardless of your state, wonwoo still insisted on flying out to you. according to your best friend, you were still passed out. fortunately for wonwoo, his flight would take him to you within five hours, meaning you'd likely be awake by the time he got to you. his heart couldnt help but continue to race for you. the scare was still fresh in his mind, and the thought that he wouldve been away from you had it been something worse made him want to repent.
somehow he managed to fall asleep during the flight, only to be awoken by his manager the moment the plane landed. thankfully, it had been an unplanned flight, which meant wonwoo had the luxury of no one awaiting him at the airport. he had covered himself up – a bucket hat and a face mask sufficed to get him to where he needed to be with no recognition. he made the trip as quick as possible, feeling an instinctual need to be by your side.
after some very inconvenient paperwork, he made it to your room, standing outside as he pondered as to why he was scared to go in. you were fine. and probably even awake by now. but he couldnt help but think: it had taken him a total of seven hours to get to you. if anything ever happened to you, his idol schedule would always get in the way. your husband was not truly a husband. he was always away, always prioritizing his work and his fans, unable to tend to you in such moments. he always knew you'd be better off with someone who partook a more conventional career, but moments like this truly proved his theory.
even now, he felt like a terrible partner. he was pitying himself instead of checking on you. the realization made him shake his head at his own thoughts, forcing them away as he walked in. any thinking prior to that moment had been useless, as his heart became swollen with adoration the moment he saw you look up at the door, smiling as soon as your eyes landed on him. you didnt pay mind to your injuries, sitting up and extending your healthy arm towards him to draw him in.
he couldnt help but fall into your arms, doing his best to avoid any broken bones as he held you against him. he was aware that some of his body weight was above you, but you wouldnt let him pull away to readjust. you wanted him in your arms as much as he did you.
damn any insecurities wonwoo had. he'd be selfish and keep you to himself. if he had to exhaust himself through hours of travel to get to you, he would. or even better, he'd take you with him from now on. be damned anything that tried to get in the way of him and his love.
"my love ..."
"dont worry, nonu. im fine! it was just a freak accident. you didnt have to come, but ... fuck, im so happy you're here," you rambled as soon as you pulled away, still keeping him sitting on the bed as you leaned as close to him as possible.
"ill always come, you know that," he paused, "you scared the fuck out of me, i ... that call. ive never been more terrified. im sorry i wasnt here, im sorry i-"
"wonwoo, no! i understand. i cant believe you flew all the way to see me even if its just a few broken bones. im sorry i scared you."
his hand made its way to your cheek, caressing it gently as he smiled sweetly at you, "dont apologize. ill take a million scares if it means you're okay. i ... is it okay if i stay? i want to take care of you. actually, no, i dont care if its too much, i- i need to be by your side. can i?"
"yes. you dont have to ask, i always want you here."
"good. ill take you home with me as soon as you're discharged. never letting you out of my sight again."
"what about tour, you-"
"shh. ill take care of it. you're my priority. ill take care of you, okay? i love you."
"i love you more, nonu."
he let yet another sigh of relief at those five words, knowing that as soon as he heard those words, he'd be okay. you'd both be okay.
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causenessus · 3 months
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Love Languages. | Bungou Stray Dogs
inc: dazai, chuuya, akutagawa, tecchou, jouno
written in 2nd pov (female reader implied)
song recc: do you love by trish toledo & baby bash
word count: 2324 words
pretty sure everything is written in lowercase except for names if they didn't look ugly capitalized bc aesthetics !!! had tons of fun writing this I apologize, this is barely proofread and for literally every character I got too caught up in specific examples and scenarios and just kept building off of it but I think they're kind of sweet so I hope u enjoy <3
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dazai osamu - acts of service
“she peels an orange for us in the morning / she woke me up to give me half” golden girl - frank ocean
he’s terrible at taking care of himself, so someone who takes the time to care for him just makes every wall crumble
he’s probably horrible at remembering to eat as well, so if you make something for him he’ll treasure it forever
bonus points if your job requires you to wake up earlier than him (which isn’t hard, he def comes in a little later than his coworkers) and you leave something for him to eat when he wakes up or to take with him to work (or both <3)
he’ll start to look forward to waking up in the mornings in hope that you’ve made him something
never asks you if you’ll make something in specific or if you’ll even make him something at all. he adores anything you make and doesn’t want to make you feel obliged to do something if you happen to be tired and don’t want to cook tomorrow
voices all his appreciation for you when you both have laid down to go to sleep
“bella, I can’t tell you how much it means to me, all that you do. you really don’t have to make me anything if it’s a hassle in the morning or when you get home. you already work so hard.”
you turned onto your other side to face him, pushing a stray lock of hair behind his ear as you smiled, “I do it because I want to, ‘Samu. and because I love you. if I can’t spend the day with you because we’re both at work, at least I can take care of you.”
his chest buzzed with so much happiness his eyes stung for a moment. he held himself back from saying that he didn’t deserve you. saying something like that wouldn’t solve anything. instead, he’d make himself worthy of you by helping out as well
he probably can’t cook very well but he finds other ways to help, washing the dishes, doing the laundry, getting groceries, and cleaning the place so that there’s less on your plate
ask him to do anything and he’ll get it done for you as soon as possible <3
I think that for him, receiving such sweet love without any words is foreign to him but is just what he needs. he’d rather show how much he loves you than say it (although he loves to tell you it as well). getting out of bed could be so difficult for him some days, yet having a goal for himself has motivated him to become a better person. he wakes up, excited for what you may have made him and ready to do whatever he can for you
nakahara chuuya - gift giving
“they asked, ‘do you love her to death?’ I said, ‘speak of her over my grave and watch how she brings me back to life.’” - mahmoud darwish
it’s easier for him to express how much you mean to him by giving you everything you want and everything he thinks you would like
he still tells you that he loves you every chance he gets, but oftentimes it is accompanied by a gift, no matter how small it may be, from just a single rose to a whole garden
for him, it gives a new purpose in his work; he’s working in order to get you whatever your pretty heart desires
he’s proud to use his hard-earned money to buy you things (rather than spending it all on wine <3 ily chuuya)
the easiest thing he can always get you is a favorite snack or drink and he’s got a whole system for it
he knows every store it’s available at and many of the clerks are familiar with him from the sheer amount of times he’s visited them to buy something for you. it never grows old for him, his favorite thing to do is buy you something on his way home from work or during the day when he’s planning to surprise you with a visit
he keeps a mental list of what your favorite things are. you’ll tell him about something you like without thinking anything of it but he’s already planned out when and how to give the item to you. it’s always on his mind what he’ll buy you each day, and it’s always worth it seeing you enjoy whatever he’s bought you
sometimes it’s as simple as a coffee and he’ll drop by your work to give it to you in person
“hanging in there, Angel? need a little pick-me-up?” he has the biggest smile on his face every time he sees you, and bringing a gift for you with him only adds to his excitement
“you spoil me, Chuuya,” you wrap your arms around his neck, leaning further into him as he holds you in his arms.
“what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?” he responds, rubbing your back as you sigh.
receiving gifts from you is just as sweet. no one has ever given him as many gifts as he’s given others–which is fine with him–it’s not about what he’ll get in return and he knows that not everyone expresses their love the way he does
but he’s touched whenever you get him something. since giving gifts is so meaningful to him, it means even more that someone would go through the trouble to give something back to him
he’ll keep whatever you get him close to him at all times and smile every time he sees it or remembers it
once, you bought him a new chain for his hat and he hasn’t changed it since. it only made the hat more special to him now that it reflects two people that had changed his life
akutagawa ryunosuke - words of affirmation
“my love, you are worth it all.”
we all know how the boy responded to dazai’s praise or even simply just the words “dazai wants to talk to you”
to hear a person who has persisted through his stubborn, aggressive defense say they still love him causes him to start to soften for you
he’s been surrounded by harsh words and people who have exploited him and brushed him to the side whenever he wasn’t needed all his life, so it stirs his heart to hear someone notice things about him and who tells him that they want to stay with him
it’s something reserved for solitary moments just between the two of you for sure, but that makes the time all the more special because he can let down his guard and just be with you
his past has made it hard for him to believe he is worthy of anything other than the murderous skills he’s harnessed in order to get him to where he is in the Mafia, but you’ve shown him that there’s more to him than just how well he can use Rashomon
he never bothers to try and listen to what other people are saying but he always gives his full attention to anything you have to say
he doesn’t even like to hear compliments from anyone else, he doesn’t trust them at all but he trusts and believes anything you tell him, knowing you have the purest intentions of loving and supporting him
after a job, all he wants to do is go home. by the end of the day, he’s sick of everyone around him so on the rare occasion that you decide to visit him, he won’t even notice until you call out to him
he had just finished a job, it was successful, but it had gotten messy. Mori had already told him off and he didn’t want to hear anything from anyone else. he stormed past every piece of vermin that had decided to get in his way, their whispers just barely reaching his ears
“Ryu!” you called out from amongst them, waiting by a door.
“What?” he hadn’t meant to snap, especially when he realized it was you talking to him and his face immediately relaxed when he saw you.
“oh, [y/n].” he immediately started to make his way towards you, the pounding in his head slowly starting to disappear the closer
“I came to pick you up, I’m glad I had good timing,” you smiled, offering your hand.
he took it gently, giving it a soft squeeze, “I’m sorry I responded so rudely, I didn’t–”
“you’re okay, Ryu,” you placed your other hand on top of it, looking him straight in the eyes, keeping a loving smile on your face, “you don’t ever have to be sorry. you’re doing just fine. even better, actually. I’m so proud of all your work and I’m sure you’re tired after everything today. it looked busy.”
the words erased every memory of Mori’s scolding that his head had latched on to in order to beat himself down later on. he felt his cheeks warm a little as he looked away, “you’re too kind to me, [y/n].”
tries his best to also put into words his appreciation but it’s so hard for him to verbally say it; sometimes it comes out wrong
instead, he’s opted for notes most of the time, leaving them on your bedside or in your bag, telling you how thankful he is for you and that he loves you
suehiro tecchou - quality time
“on the train we swapped seats, you wanted the window and I wanted to look at you.” - mahmoud darwish
my boy is always so busy
as soon as he’s off work he just wants to be wherever you’re at
he’d doesn’t mind silence and doesn’t care where he is as long as he’s with you
sometimes gets off work and if you’re not home yet just sneaks into your workplace to be around you
adores following you around and doesn’t always know exactly what you’re doing but he’s just happy to tag along
grocery store dates are some of his favorite moments with you
he loves everything about convenience stores
he loves food and the endless aisles of colorful packages and choices
(it gives him ideas for new food combinations <3)
once bought a himalayan salt shaker simply because
“look [y/n]! they make pink salt :0”
later put said pink salt on top of strawberry ice cream bc they were both pink
he also loves getting to look around the store all the while following you. he admires your organized grocery lists and how you’ve already planned out what you’re going to buy
once you tried to send him out to grab something in an area you’d already passed so that you could continue going down the list
“can you go grab some carrots for me, love? sorry, I forgot to pick them up when we were in the produce section.”
“of course 🙂” his heart is shattering inside of him at the thought of being separated from you.
“do you want to stay with me and we’ll go back later?” you ask, looking up at him with a knowing smile.
“yes pls”
groceries stores are not the only place you guys go tho i promise
if you’re still in school, he’ll accompany you on study dates 
never bothers you under any circumstances and if he is and you tell him he’ll stop right away
he could spend all day looking at your pretty face even if you never once looked at him <3
jouno saigiku - physical touch
“you kiss the back of my legs and I want to cry / the sun has come this close, only the sun” “GPS” - Shauan Barbosa
although he can’t see you, he knows your body by heart <3
he’s spent so much time tracing it over and over with his hands
i think his favorite thing to do, especially after a long day at work is flop onto you and just listen to your heartbeat. probably also intertwines one of his hands with yours, often runs other across your skin
loves when you touch him just as much
if he’s lying on top of you and you decide to run a hand through his hair, all of his problems have just melted away
you both have definitely fallen asleep like that countless times no matter what time of day it is
he’s always finding ways to be in close contact with you, making sure that you’re safe and near him
again, he loves loves loves to hold your hand, he’ll reach for it any chance he gets
will also settle for an arm around your shoulder though as long as you’re close to him
definitely the type to also rest his head on top of yours or on your shoulder every chance he gets
if he needs to fidget he won’t even play with his own fingers he’ll just play with yours
i think that with the loss of one sense, the other senses hold so much meaning for him
it’s easier and more meaningful for him to show his love and how much he trusts you through touch rather than just saying it out loud
comes up from behind you to hug you a lot, especially in the kitchen or when you’ve just come home he’s there immediately, hugging you to recharge
“how was your day, my love?”
you always relax in his arms, turning your head slightly to kiss his face which he’s let rest on your shoulder, “it was missing you.”
he placed a chaste kiss on your lips, “i’ll make it all up to you now, darling.”
there was one time that he let you do his hair
he’s never told you how much he enjoyed it; he didn’t even know what you had done to it, but being near your warmth is all he needs and can ask for <3
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mirohlayo · 2 months
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LANDO AS YOUR BOYFRIEND
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note : been away for a while but i'm back guys !! (i needed a little break from writing). I also change a bit my posts' style/aesthetic !! anyways, so happy to be back again and can't wait to give you all new writings 🧡
he's hopelessly in love with you. of course this boy is so head over heels for you. his heart only wants you and you can be sure you're all safe in it because there's is no other person in his mind. he thinks about you all the time, rambles about you to everyone, always smiles when he sees you. he definitely looks at you with heart-eyes and he's never afraid to make it obvious he's so into you. he makes sure he tells you everyday how much he loves you, and how life would mean nothing without you. this boy is so obsessed with you that sometimes he refuses to let you go, even for a minute. he just wants to show his love for you, and that in every way possible.
he always sends good morning/night texts. when he's not home, he always sends you cute texts in the morning. he asks if you slept well, what's your plans for the day and of course lots of red hearts and a "love u baby". it's a way to keep an eye on you and care about you even though he's not here. and also the big and bright smile he wears when he sees your message. he sometimes asks for a pic of you, because he wants to start the day with the pretty face of his girl in his mind. and of course he also sends you good night texts. he asks about your day before leaving you with some cheesy lines he texted you. he knows you'll laugh when you'll read them and just thinking about that makes him smile like an idiot who is totally in love.
he loves matching outfits. this man can pull out either amazing outfits or so random outfits. but he for sure dresses well when his outfit matches yours. he loves when you ask him to match your clothes because it shows everyone you guys are a thing. that you two belongs to each other. and he also admires your sense of style. he thinks everything suits you, and you look great in literally anything. he's always so happy to help you choose your outfit for the day. but not more than when you're wearing the same thing. so when you two are dressed up, he'd take a picture and then post it on his story, just to show the world he got the best stylist and of course the best girlfriend.
he's so devoted to you. so sooo dedicated to you. this boy is already hopelessly in love with you but the way he's devoted to you is insane. he never ever thinks or thought about any girl before. always you. it's just you in his mind and heart. he's so loyal to you and you know it because he doesn't wait a second to refuses girl's advances and tell them he already got the girl of his dreams. he's so happy with you, he feels so good with you. you even became his home. his safe person. he's so loving that he swears everyday he'll love you better than the day before. you're the only one he loves, wants and needs. that's why he constantly wants to be with you, near you. he would do literally anything for you. because it's you.
he sends you gifts when he's away. like good morning texts, one of his way to show you his love and affection is to send you gifts when he's not home. it can be very expensive or handmade gifts (tho i'm not sure about this talent), also big flowers bouquets. it depends, but you always receive gifts from him. sometimes it's twice a week. he likes to spoil you even though you say to him he doesn't need to do that. but it makes him happy to send you those things and he'll never stops doing that. it's one of his favorite things. and of course he leaves a note on them, like cute stuff with hearts everywhere or even pictures of his face.
he makes you his first priority. you're so important to him. really important. you're his favorite person in the whole world, you're his world. as i said before he'd do anything for you and that's why he prioritizes you. throughout your relationship he placed you as his first priority in life and now he can't help but always choose you no matter what. of course you say to him that it can be sometimes toxic, that it's not really healthy to give up everything just for you and he knows it. of course he tries to balance between you and other things. but still you remains as his first priority because he doesn't want to lose you. he doesn't want to leave you because he feels so so good with you. so be ready to always be his first choice.
he writes down every little things about you. this one's cute. when he was crushing hard on you he remembered every single detail about you and what you like. and he still does it now that you're together. he writes down on a paper every things you mention. things you like, favorite musics, places you want to travel to. literally everything and anything. it's his job to know you and your preferences. because then he can gives you what you want, he can ever be a better boyfriend. he also melts when he sees your face light when he'd mention about your things. it's adorable the way you look so surprised and genuinely happy to know he remembers these things. you're so interesting to him, he could listen to you every all day long without getting bored.
he's such a needy and clingy boyfriend. oh this one. this papaya boy is so clingy. and so needy. people think you're the clingy one in the relationship but that's bullshit. lando is literally a boyfriend who constantly needs his girlfriend's attention. every single minutes. seconds even. if you don't give him some cuddles or kisses he's already pouting. he grabs your waist from nowhere and the second later you're stuck under his body, his arms tightly around you. and his head in the crook of your neck while he soothes down in the scent of your fragrance. he's so needy, he always and always asks for more cuddles, more kisses, more hugs. he barely can let you go for a second, he needs to touch you and feels you. it comforts him so much. and you don't complain because either you can't get enough of his affection.
he can get jealous over little things. lando can get easily jealous sometimes. it's not really toxic or unhealthy, it's actually kinda cute. when he gets jealous it's more likely to joke, even though there's still some serious jealousy of course. but it's just for fun. like if he sees you too close to a man, or laughing to much with an other driver, he's more likely to get jealous and then pout until you give him all your attention. he can't help him, he wants you all for himself. you're his girl and you belongs to him just as he belongs to you. he also doesn't like when men look at you longingly, because he knows you're such a perfect girl that a lot of people want. it's one of the reason he'll always keep chasing after you. but other than that, his jealousy is just cute itself. just a poor boy who wants his girl.
he can't say no to you. you mean everything to him so obviously he can not say no to you. when you ask him something he already knows his answer will be yes and nothing else. especially when you have puppy eyes, it's impossible to not say yes to you. you're just too adorable like that. he feels bad every times he says no and that's why he refuses to say it again. because after all you have the privilege of being the only person who make him so soft. when i say he's ready to accept anything for you it's just the pure truth. you're the prettiest to his eyes, the perfect girl, the most precious person ever in his life, mind, and heart.
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testrella · 3 months
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you're my religion priest! s. geto x f!reader pt.1→pt.2
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synopsis: y/n moved into a small and tight knit town to take care of her elderly grandmother. what happens when she attends a sermon with her grandmother, and finds herself lusting over someone she cannot have.
fandom: jujutsu kaisen ⌗ priest suguru geto x female reader⌗ modern au content warnings: mild cursing, smut, head (giving), religious themes(?), slight degrading at the end, angst(?) public sex, NSFW.
author's note: over 11k words, u guys have fun
“..in the name of the father, and of the son, and of the holy spirit. amen.”
father geto finishes off the sermon with the routine prayer. he takes the opportunity being on stage to scan the loyal audience. it was the regular, older people he preaches to. the same people who boast about him being so devoted to God at such a young age. how that when they were his age, they were off sinning. he thinks about the constant praises about being a young devoted follower, but it immediately stops when he sees her. 
a young lady, who seemed to be around the same age as him, sitting in the very back with an elderly woman. even though she was dressed as modestly as possible, the black floor length dress immersed your body in all the right places.
when did he allow his immoral thoughts come to mind
 “oh father! you must meet mrs. johnson’s granddaughter- maybe you can convince her to turn to God.” an elder of the church whispered to the priest. she gently pulled him to the side, off of the stage. 
“as you must have heard by now, edith’s grandbaby is out of control. rumor has it that she’s been caught using multiple different contraband, and premarital sex! can you believe edith would allow this to go on for so long?!”
geto mentally sighs, gossiping was always an issue at church. especially since it was located in a very small town, there wasn't much to talk about. when you were new to town, the locals went wild. fabricating very detail of your life, and spouting that nonsense through their teeth.
“with respect dear mary, the scripture speaks strongly against gossip. i’ll talk to the young lady, but please watch yourself. for there is no greater sin than sin.”
she nods while looking down, unable to meet geto’s gaze. too embarrassed to voice her concern furthermore, she mutters “yes father, please forgive me.”
“i am not the one you should be asking for forgiveness, ask the man above. now if you’ll excuse me, i’ll introduce myself to the newest member of our church.” he smiles gracefully before making his way towards mrs. johnson and her ‘scandalous’ granddaughter. 
he takes small steps towards you, puffing his chest out as he walks with a sense of pride. sure you were a pretty girl, but he was only interested to guide you through your religious journey. 
“father geto, i introduce you to my granddaughter. this is y/n. she’s only 20, and she recently moved into town to take care of me. isn’t she the kindest?”
he loses his train of thought. he's unable to bring himself to utter a single word. you were much more gorgeous up-close. if he were to describe your beauty, he’d be too overwhelmed, and wouldn’t know where to start. maybe he’d start with the way your nose fits your face perfectly. or, how your smile molded perfectly with your faint smile lines. 
geto snaps out of his trance, and quickly introduces himself. 
“i’m father geto. welcome to this church, i hope your stay has been great so far.” he purred. 
you squint your eyes at him. almost as if you already knew the rumors going around. nonetheless, you shake his hand. 
“like my grandma said, i’m y/n. i do hope we cross paths alone in the future.”
he blushes from the way you shaked his hand, but also put your other hand on his. solidifying the handshake more than it needed too. not only that, the last comment you made. crossing paths.. alone?
“my confessional booth is always open before my sermon, and at 9 PM on sundays. if that’s what you mean of course.” 
you puff your chest out and let out a dramatic sigh. taking in your arms, and letting them rest to your side, you open your mouth to speak. he stares at your lips, refusing to make eye contact.
“the sermon did end, i guess i’ll have to see you later tonight.” you assured him before walking over to your grandmother who made conversation with someone else. he watched you walk away, allowing himself to sneak a peek from behind. 
later that day, geto was having lunch. he finds himself unable to focus on his best friend's story, the words going in one ear and out the other. all the plays in his mind is you, and what you could possibly up to.
“satoru, i think i was seduced today after my sermon.” he spilled out, no longer able to contain his thoughts. 
“gross! how old was she? 50? 69? HA, get it? 69?” 
geto rolls his eyes at the blue eyed ‘man’ who acted immaturely any chance he got. maybe he really should have kept his thoughts to himself. it was better than trying to converse it with an actual man-child.
“goodness satoru, no. she was a few years younger than me. 4 years to be exact. she’s one of the elder’s granddaughter, and the way she spoke to me made me feel like i was sinning. i didn’t even do anything!”
“well..”
his eyebrow quirks as satoru began his sentence. 
“did she have big tits?” 
geto’s face quickly turned from curiosity to disgust. he abruptly stood up from the table, placing both hands on it for support, and got all up in satoru’s face.
“how could you ever speak so unashamedly about a lady like that?! let alone speak like that in front of a priest!”
“well forgive me father, i didn’t mean to offend you and your girlfriend,” satoru said sarcastically while putting his hands up defensively. “i’ve said worse, and you’ve never had a problem with it until now. she must’ve had big tits for you to go all preacher mode on me.“  
as much as geto didn’t want to admit it, satoru was right. there were many time's geto allowed the white haired man to say the most diabolical stuff known to man. even listening when satoru would describe women’s bodies in detail and occasionally his one night stands. why was this any different?
“excuse me, is that you father?” 
there is was.
the seductive voice he met only hours ago. both boys slowly turn their heads to the h/c girl standing right in front of them. their eyes met with the beauty talked about earlier. only now you were wearing a shorter version of the dress you wore earlier. 
“m-miss. y/n? i’m afraid you’ve caught me at a bad time. what brings you here?” 
you only acknowledge one of the two men in front of her, and of course it was geto. your eyes met his, and never shifted away. it was almost like a dance of temptation, daring him to do further than just eye contact. the dark aura coming from you was overwhelming him, or maybe it was just your strong perfume. 
“i apologize for the disruption, father geto. my grandma asked me to run some errands. i guess i’ll have to speak with you later tonight.“ 
before geto could get a word in, you once again walk off. just like before, he once again glances down there. 
forgive me Lord, for i have sinned. 
“dude what the fuck was that..” the white haired man questioned. he also noticed the thick tension that was stirred by non other than you.
“i d-don’t know. i cannot see her tonight. i’m scared she might tempt me into.. into doing something that’s against the scripture.”
he now finds himself in the confessional booth, anxiously waiting for your arrival. it was currently 9:47 PM, you were late. it did not help his anxiety at all. he’d give you until 10:15 for you to arrive. anything later would have to just be scheduled on another sunday. 
he lets out a deep breath before he hears the clattering of heels. geto takes a peak out of his curtain only to be met with a sultry gaze. he quickly closes off his curtain, and subconsciously wipes his sweaty palms on his lap. this was like any other confessional, there was nothing to be conspicuous. 
“father geto? are you there?“ you ask in a voice just above a whisper. 
geto swallows whatever was in his mouth before speaking.
 “of course i am.“ 
“ahem, forgive me father. i have sinned since i first moved into this town. actually, i sinned today after the sermon.“ 
he stays silent. he’s tempted to ask what you’ve done, and if it possibly had something to do with him. but you answer his unspoken questions before he can think about it for too long.
“before moving into this lovely town, my grandmother sent me a picture of her priest. goodness, i didn’t know what to do with myself.“ 
he was determined to stay stoic, and not to speak unless it was to say a prayer. but her hushed voice and the strong tension made it difficult. the air seemed to thicken every time she finished a sentence. geto couldn’t escape your magnetic pull of lust.
“a-and if i may ask, what did you do to deal with your problem?”
“i couldn’t resist myself. after i saw the photo of him, i began to have lewd thoughts. every night leading up to my departure, i’d touch myself thinking about him. then..”
she lets out a small moan, but geto would describe it as a small whine. now he was breathing heavily as his boxers started to tighten up. there was no way he could get hard in the church. it was sinful. but he was here to help you, and allowed you to continue.
“i met him today. after the sermon i started using objects to make myself feel satisfied. but it was nothing compared to his large hands shaking my hand. i can only imagine him using his hands going inside of me instead of holding a bible. even now, i cannot resist his voice..” you confessed as heavy breathing came from your end. 
“..come over to my side dear. let me help you.” he whispered.
you waste no time he notes from the sounds coming from the other side. your heels clacked once or twice before you pulled the curtain from his side. 
he studies your face very carefully. there was a light red tint spreading across your cheeks, and your ears were bright red. his eyes then wander down to your very revealing shirt that showed a lot of cleavage. the shirt was accompanied by a matching skirt, a very, VERY, short skirt.
you walk into the tight fitting booth. before he can get his hands on you, you kneel down in between his legs. your pretty little head lays on his left thigh.
“forgive me father. how can i ever make you forgive me for my sins?” you lift your head and your hands start to wander on the edge of his pants. “tell me father, there must be a way..”
geto feels a bead of sweat going down his forehead. there were many times that grandparents introduced their grandchildren to him, in hopes they get married. or, when satoru would convince him to agree to a blind date. his answer of rejection was always the same. 
‘i am devoted to the man above, i musn’t be distracted.’ 
where was his reasoning of rejection when he watches you pull both his pants and undergarments off? 
you grab his dick and painfully slowly lick the tip of it. leaving any pre-cum on his tip, now in your mouth. a slight moan leaves his mouth. this was a pleasure that he’s never experienced before. devoting all 24 years of his life to God has never brought this much fulfilment. 
where was his reasoning of rejection when you put his whole dick in your mouth without any hesitation?
your sudden move of deep throating him caught him off guard. he’s now holding your head in a gentle manner, as gentle as he can be. geto is lost at words, he can only moan uncontrollably while playing with your hair. the only thing he can fixate his eyes on was your beautiful hair getting tangled into his fingers. 
where was his reasoning when you made him finish in under five minutes even though it felt like an eternity for him?
you continue to suck him off, hollowing your cheeks for a better suction. your hands wander down to his balls, giving it a small massage. you're not sure what you did right, but it worked. geto was now praising your name instead of the lord’s. he feels an unfamiliar knot unwinding itself. 
“y/n.. please i feel..” he lets out a breathy moan instead of finishing his sentence. his eyes shut close to full enjoy the euphoric feeling. why did he want to reject your advances in the first place? he can't seem to remember. 
“father..” you cooed while taking off his shirt. of course, the hot pastor with a big dick was also very nicely built.
“oh geto, why do you hide this from me?”
your hands wander his chest then it starts to follow his happy trail. your movement was haltered when he reached out for your chest.
“the same could be said for yourself. show yourself to me, please. i beg.”
his eyes looked like a puppy who had been kicked. there was no sane woman in the world who would say no to his violet eyes. your hand then reaches out for his, and then place his hand on the hem of your shirt.
“take it off for me, father geto.”
being enchanted with your hypnotic gaze, it drew him like a moth to a flame. he lifted your shirt, taking your bra off as well, and stared with admiration. you had an art of seduction that was compared to no other. he watches you sit on his lap as you lift your skirt. 
this is sin. he was sinning. 
but he didn’t stop you as you sat slowly onto his dick, moaning in joy. he watches you go up and down painfully slow.
“c-can you go a little faster..?“ he moaned into your ear. being too embarrassed by his request, he buries himself on the side of your neck. taking in your scent, leaving small pecks on the spots you sprayed perfume. 
“you’re t-too big geto~” you whined into his ear before you attached your lips onto his. 
he was an inexperienced kisser. an inexperienced everything actually. it was easy for you to take the lead by biting onto his bottom lip. he opened his mouth to let out a small whine of pain and you took the opportunity to slip your tongue in. 
you feel yourself juices slide down your thigh onto geto���s lap as you continue to bounce on his dick. large hands start groping your ass, giving you a smack on one of your cheeks. you yelp in response. it was unexpected from a priest.
“father, use me. be as rough as you want with me.” your hands start undoing his bun, turning his hair into a disheveled mess. 
“i-i shouldn't be so mmm- rough on you.” 
you felt honored by his insistence on being so gentle. his grip on your waist tells you a different story. it was obvious he wanted to go faster than the pace you set.
“please geto, for me at least.”
oh, how could he ever deny your requests? 
his grip on your waist tightens as he lifts you up and rams into you. all pent up sexual frustrations he’s ever had in the past 24 years are being taken out on you. throughout the heavens and earth, you were his only sole purpose in life. the way you took him in so good without any complaints was proof enough. 
marks form on his shoulder and back from the scratches you were leaving. it was the only way you could hold yourself up. if not, you’d fall right into his arms while he’d continue to show no mercy on your pussy. 
geto was starting to feel what he felt earlier when you were in between his legs. his eyes gaze at yours, and gets a site he’d never unsee. small tears started forming, threatening to leave your eyes. your mouth agape as one hand held onto his shoulder, the other groping yourself.
“father geto, i-i’m ahh, i’m so close~”
on sync, the both of you came at the very same time.
geto found it more ironic than disgust when he saw the scene unfold. priest of six years, never had a temptation once in those six years. his lap was now covered in cum from not only his but the new girl in town. the new girl who easily seduced him
“forgive us lord, for the father and i have sinned.” you purred right into his ear, almost biting it. 
he massages your waist before finally putting you on your two feet. you're barely able to stand up without the support of the wall.
"y/n, we can never do this again. never speak to me unless it's about my sermon."
now it was his turn to leave before you could get a word in. he pulls his pants up and swiftly puts his shirt back on.
"you were sent by the devil, and i've failed my lord. stay far away from me you whore."
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screeching-bunny · 9 months
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may i request a yandere god/angel? The idea of something so pure..the one thing you have faith in is actually the thinkg keeping u trapped in their obsession bubble is so appealing to me. having no hope left anymore. just them <3
Yandere! God Hcs
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Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Yandere Thoughts, Bad Writing, Stalking, Possessive Behavior, Reader is Referred as ‘You’
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🌟 Yandere! God embodies profound wisdom and possesses knowledge beyond mortal comprehension. They have a mysterious aura and speak in riddles, often challenging his followers to seek enlightenment and often confusing the hell out of them. He’s very unpredictable and playful. He finds joy in playful interactions and enjoys surprising their followers with unexpected twists while they worship him. He lives for drama and will one hundred percent mislead his followers.
🌟 Yandere! God is starstruck when he first sees you. He can’t believe that such a cutie is worshiping him and is such a devoted follower. Any prayer that you wish for, he immediately tries to make it become a reality. Since he’s an all powerful god, you can best believe that he will misuse his powers when it comes to you. What’s this? You met a cute guy at work and flirted with him? Well too bad he got struck by lightning five times and died on the spot. Truly unfortunately. He’ll do his best to isolate you from your friends and family. You’ll be so lost that the only thing you can do is just pray to him whenever you can. The thought of this has him kicking his feet up in the air and twirling his hair.
🌟 Yandere! God plans out exactly how and when you guys will finally meet in person. After watching you for many hours he wants this moment to be as perfect as possible. He makes sure to be as dramatic and extra as possible, revealing himself in a very flashy way. Some lightning here and there and some cool looking smoke for his entrance. One day your just praying to him and poof he’s out in front of you.
“WHAT THE— WHO ARE YOU?!?”
“Some people want to meet me, some people don’t believe me, and some people claim to be me. I am…?”
“OH MY GOSH YOU’RE BATMAN?!?!”
“Yes it is— WAIT NO!!!”
🌟 Yandere! God eventually stops speaking in riddles around you because of your inability to get the correct answer. It’s just the only way that he can communicate with you properly and have you understand what he’s saying. Don’t worry though he still loves you nonetheless even if you are a total airhead. He will, however, personally tutor you if it ever really comes down to it. He still speaks in riddles to everyone else but you.
🌟 Yandere! God enjoys watching you pray to him. You view him as someone to look up to and ask about life questions. He makes sure to manipulate you by giving you advice that causes you to become a social outcast to the rest of the world. Who needs friends or a lover when you have him? Whenever his servants hear him say these things to you they just side eye him. They don’t try to do anything about it though because there’s no stopping him when it comes to love.
🌟 Yandere! God uses his followers as entertainment. They’re like his own personal reality tv show that he can control whenever he wants. He loves dropping random things on them and watching them freak out about it. Do you remember the time when a bunch of archeologists dug up an ancient rock with diamonds around it? Yeah, that was his badly made art craft that he threw away years ago. Do you also remember that hurricane that nearly destroyed a country a few months ago? Yeah that was also him, he just accidentally sneezed in the wrong direction that day. His followers believe that anything he does has a meaning behind it. Those natural disasters that have been happening recently must be a test from him. When in reality it was just you messing around with the weather because you we bored.
🌟 Yandere! God would make a new flower and name it after you. His love for you is infinite and would like to spend all of eternity with you. When you first met him you thought that he was supposed to be a generous and pure being. It was because of this thought that you never really saw his advances towards you as romantic. You just brushed these thoughts off and thought you were crazy for even thinking this was. When he found out what you were thinking he nearly ripped his hair off.
🌟 Yandere! God uses the idea of enlightenment to forever trap you by his side. Ditch all the people that you once knew and live with him. This is the only way for you to reach your full potential. People are just vial and disgusting so just jump right into his arms. He’s honestly so good a gaslighting that you don’t even question him and just do exactly what he says. To him it’s almost comical but he couldn’t be prouder of you. If you ever tried to gaslight him it wouldn’t work. I mean you can’t out gaslight the original gaslighter. He was literally the blueprint.
🌟 Yandere! God is terrible at cooking. This is understandable because he is a god and doesn’t need to consume food in order to survive. You, however, do need it. He tries his best to cook food for you but whenever you eat his food you always get food poisoning and need to run to the toilet. He always looks so proud when handing you the dishes that he made that you don’t have the heart to tell him that you don’t want it. So you usually just suck it up and shove it right down your throat.
🌟 Yandere! God is aware that you are a mortal and will one day die. So he tries various ways to make you immortal whether you like it or not. The thought of you dying just pains him and he’d do anything to prevent it from happening. He would destroy and sacrifice the entire universe if it meant that you’d be safe with him. Being with him is so suffocating. He’s like a clingy dog that always bites for attention. There is honestly no quiet moment where you get to be alone in your own thoughts because he is always watching you.
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dykeknightrises · 7 months
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PROMISES
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A/N: I'd just like to say that I'm in absolute awe about the reactions to FALLING, really! I was very hesitant to post something that I've wrote but now I can't help but to be super excited laknkdns Seriously, thank you guys SO much for it! Here's part two, I hope you enjoy it <3
PART 1 - FALLING
PART 3 - US
After a couple of years living the best and worst of her life, Alexia promised herself a break. A year where she would be one hundred percent focused on football and herself. She had a lot to catch up with her family and with being comfortable with herself after her injury.
Everything had been going fairly well on that front until Y/N arrived in Barcelona. Alexia remembered the bright-eyed teenager, far too young to be playing in the u-19 team, being playing great, nonetheless. Watching the teen leave absolutely everything even when they were down 4-0 made Alexia respect her immediately and to keep up with her career whenever she could.
The Y/N was far from the shy teenager that Alexia first met, but still so terrifyingly similar. Her first few weeks in Barcelona passed in a blur, but not a good one. The midfielder and the rest of the team barely interacted with the newest signing and when it happened, which was strictly at practice since she didn’t join them when they spend time together, it was mostly through the shortest sentences possible.
Alexia realized the smallest flinch from Y/N whenever someone spoke to her in Spanish. She didn’t mean to and was honestly certain nobody else, even yourself, realized it. Then every downed on her.
Her time playing with Espanyol and Levante was weird. She was still in her home, still in her country, still in her city, but everything was just so different. Her teammates, the team culture, everything made her doubt herself for the first few months. A new country, a new city, a new language, a whole new culture? Alexia could not fathom that.
Settling in making Y/N feel home, Alexia now spent most of her time dedicating herself to her. They were partners in every training drill, spending their time together doing the heavy speaking in English. When she was home, countless of hours on YouTube were split between watching highlights of Y/N through the years and on tutorials about the best ways to make someone feel welcomed.
She wasn’t sure why and at that point she didn’t care enough to ask, but she needed Y/N to feel at home in Barcelona. When her attempts were going well, but too slowly for her liking, she was running out of patience.
Walking Nala down the streets was something she was doing a lot lately, lost in thoughts about Y/N. The little furball got tired after twenty minutes of their walk, making Alexia pick her up, only then realizing where she was.
In front of her stood her favourite chocolate store, the best in the entire Spin if anyone asked her. Deciding to buy a bar a pick-me-up for the moment, she walked into the store, greeting to small family that owned the business and making small talk.
Picking the small bar of milk chocolate, her hand unconsciously hovered on a second one, for Y/N. With her own bar clutched in her hand, she stood in front on the chocolate bars display, not knowing which one was your favourite. After a few minutes of contemplation, she grabbed one of every single chocolate the store held, giving the owner a sheepish smile as the old man raised his eyebrows at her purchase.
It was a Thursday when she got the guts to approach Keira to ask such a random and somewhat personal question. The Englishwoman responding very confusedly, making Alexia bolt before she could ask any follow up question on why.
Going to her car to retrieve the precious bar on a break from practice, Alexia slipped it in her locker before any of the girls could see and went back. When training was over, she managed to catch up with Y/N on an empty hallway by the pitch, telling her that it was okay to be with the team even if you weren’t in “Spanish Mode” yet, they just wanted your presence.
When she sees the realization down on Y/N eyes, she confirms that she didn’t even realize what was happening. Knowing that, if you were anything like herself, a whole moment of self-reflection would follow the realization. Alexia slips that chocolate bar on her hands and squeezes her shoulder as she leaves.
The unknown feeling growing in her gut through the rest of the day and the next one too, unsure if she overstepped or not. It was the team’s first Friday off since preseason and she was so desperately uneasy about it, unsure if she made things worse.
Walking into their usual restaurant, Alexia felt her heart skip a beat as she hears Y/N laugh at something Frido said, the smile brighter than everything around. Settling herself in the seat in front of her, being greeted with a smile and a warm gaze, a silent “thank you” written all over it.
 It wasn’t long until everything was fitting together. The team quickly welcoming her into the family and their routine stronger than ever. It wasn’t until she refused the invitation to hang out with her friends for the sixth week in a row and got called out on it that Alexia realized that Thursdays had became their day.
She was fine with sharing Y/N with the team the whole time but was so deeply grateful to have her for herself on Thursdays. Sharing their passion for football, exploring the city, and cooking together had quickly became the favourite part of Alexia’s week.
Days bled into weeks, which bled into months, and everything was perfect. It wasn’t far from Winter Break when she went to lunch with the Putellas, this time without Y/N, and got asked where her girlfriend was that Alexia realized her feelings.
Loving Y/N was disturbingly easy, Alexia though laying in bed later that day. She’d been doing it for months now. Every moment of her days she wanted her there and every moment of her night she dreamt about her.
The warmness of her discovery was slowly cooled by the realization that had already broken her promise to herself. The heartbreak of her past relationships sucker puncher her into choking down a sob, knowing that she could not take that once again, not from Y/N.
The next month passed in a haze. Alexia felt like the biggest liar, and she smiled, making sure no one could see past it. It wasn’t until she reached home that she allowed herself to crack, suffering from a paralyzing fear of having her heart broken before she even gave it away once more.
It was on their Thursday that she felt herself cracking, knowing she couldn’t be alone with Y/N, cuddled up on a couch, being surrounded by her. Texting her asking to go out instead was easy, choosing Sala Apollo came unconsciously because, even if she could be alone with Y/N, she still did not want to share her on their day.
Breathtaking. Jaw dropping. Beautiful.
Words only came to Alexia brain a few beats after Y/N opened her door or them to go out. A stutter complimenting her was the only thing the Catalonian managed to slip out before she was dragged out of the apartments complex by hand and getting in the Uber.
The decision to drink that night was a well though out one. On one hand she felt like she needed a couple of drinks to function near the younger woman that moment, but she was well aware that her inhibitions lowered considerably. She chose to drink.
Dancing with her, Alexia felt every single part of her on fire. Whenever the touched, for the briefest seconds, her heart skipped a beat, and her breath was taken away. Hands slipping on Y/N waist, pulling her closer, was a necessity.
When Y/N perfume hit her nostrils, Alexia knew she was gone. Losing any shred on self-control, Y/N was the entire world right now. Hands roaming, lips finding the skin on her neck, sucking, and biting like her life depended on it. Maybe it did. Y/N turned around to kiss her and when their lips met Alexia was sure she was in heaven.
Going home, staying up the whole night, discovering each other in so many ways was everything Alexia ever dreamed of. The warm, sweaty tanned skin against her, made her overflow. She was everything.
Waking up on the next day to a cold bed made her choke. Reality crashed down, eyes glassing as she though she was being left once again. Minutes passed, with Alexia trying desperately to not cry before she heard the noise in the kitchen.
Slipping a shirt in, she stopped on the threshold, watching Y/N happily making them breakfast. Somehow, that made her hurt more. The thought that she could have left, that she the worst of you for just keeping their routine. It made her feel sick.
She knew then that she was not ready. The feelings she held for those tortuous moment where far worse than any previous heartbreak. Just the thought that Y/N left almost broke her. Alexia knew right then that she could not be with Y/N right now, no matter how much she ached for her.
Alexia was not enough for Y/N right now.
When she turned around, spotting her tucked in a corner of her own apartment, Y/N looked at her like she hung the sun, the moon and everything else. Her breathes came out ragged as Y/N came closer, warm smile and sparkling eyes still in place.
“This was a mistake.” Alexia choked out before she came any closer. The Spaniard knew that any poor excuse that she came would never be enough.
Y/N steps haltered, no more then a couple of meters away from her, lips parting and heart breaking. Alexia could see the younger woman opening and closing her mouth, frown in place, trying to come up with an answer.
“Oh.” The word came out in a breathless sound, after what felt like a whole eternity. “I’m sorry. I’ll get out of your hair now.”
“Y/N” The blonde called, holding the other woman’s wrist, desperately not wanting her to go, despite messing everything up.
“It’s okay, Alexia. We will be okay. We are okay.” She said, slipping her wrist out of Alexia’s grasp, shutting the door after her.
She took her heart with her. Any will to do anything and joy left right after them. Falling to the floor, on the same corner that everything became a mess, Alexia let herself be mess too. Sobs wreaking her body for hours, only getting up to crawl to bed when night came.
Days came and went, turning into weeks, and Alexia was still broken. She could not look at Y/N without breaking. That was reserved for the privacy of her place, where she didn’t have to be the Alexia Putellas, where she wasn’t a symbol of strength. Strong was the last thing she felt in those months.
Months passed by before Alexia even saw anyone after practice. She missed team bonding, birthdays, media duties, her own family. A knock on the door broke her out of the pit of misery of the day, making her drag her feet through the floor, feeling like her legs weighted a thousand kilos.
The grinning face of her childhood best friend greeted her when she opened the door. The grin quickly lost the place when Ana actually saw her. Pushing past her and settling down on the couch after opening a bottle of wine, the woman looked at her with an expectant gaze.
Alexia knew she could tell her the truth. Ana was her friend enough to just call her stupid and tell her to beg for forgiveness. But she didn’t know Y/N, didn’t know Alexia’s feelings. So, the blonde settled for a lie.
Maybe the lie was too good, because the very next day, she showed up with her girlfriend and another woman. A surprise double date, she said. The woman was great, there was nothing wrong with her. In fact, Alexia was sure that if she did not love Y/N so deeply she would have giver her a chance. But she was not her.
The next day, a Friday, Mapí and Marta coaxed the date out of her. Not that it was much to tell, Alexia herself was only half present for it, but it was enough. Enough because Y/N arrived in the locker room just as the defenders teased her about it. Y/N lips trembled when she heard the word date and that was enough to bring tears that were never shed to Alexia’s eyes.
She cancelled lunch with her family again on the weekend. She hadn’t gone back ever since they asked her about Y/N, too scared that they would see her, that they knew. Preparing herself for another day the bare minimum for herself, her door opened. Alba standing on the doorstep. Alexia never saw her baby sister look so angry.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, Alexia?” the younger sister growled, entering the apartment. “Mamá is pit of worry because you look like someone has been running over you with their car everyday for the past year!”
“I’m sorry.” Alexia choked, flinching away from her sister.
She didn’t even realize that the tears, her current best friend, has already spilled out of her eyes and found home running down on her cheeks until Alba cradled her face, holding her in a hug. They laid on the comfortable couch for hours before Alexia managed to stop crying, her sister not laxing her hold for any second, whispering quiet reassurances at her every few moments.
“Ale, what’s going on?”
“I fucked it up.” She breathed out, before telling her everything.
That day was months ago. Surprising her, Alba didn’t judge her, didn’t jump the gun as usual, she held her, reassured her and gave really good advice. Which brought her to now.
Alexia spent the last few months talking extensively to her therapist about it, about everything. Her heartbreak, her injury, falling in love again. She wasn’t better yet, but she was in a much better place than before. More than wanting Y/N to love her back again, she needed her in her life, even if she had thrown away her only chance of them spending their lives together.
Today marked a whole month that Alexia came every day to Y/N doorstep, looking at the piece of wood that stood between her and the love of her life for hours, too much of a coward to knock. Finishing the cup of coffee that the awfully familiar doorman gave her from his on stash, she got up, standing in front of the door.
She had been in that exact place far too often, never knocking. Lifting her fist, she banged against the door before loosing her courage once again, like she had done far too many times.
Y/N opened her door and took Alexia’s breath away. She stood there, with a little black dress, light makeup coating her face and heels that put her just a little bit shorter than the Catalonian. The blonde felt her mouth dry at the sight of her, hands trembling away, tucked into her hoodie.
She felt like she had stood there, forever, just taking Y/N in, appreciating her, breathing her in. The younger woman was everything. She had always been everything. Her impossibly soft gaze, even now, asked Alexia what she was doing there.
“I was hoping we could have our usual Thursday? I have a lot that I need to say to you.”
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heliads · 1 year
Note
If possible could I request dating headcannons with Finnick Odair? Please and thank u so much 🙏🙏
man thank you for requesting headcanons
masterlist
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Finnick Odair never planned on falling in love 
It would never be in the cards for him, or so he supposed 
The two of you didn’t even start dating for love, more as a publicity stunt to keep you safe 
Here was Finnick, the shiny, new, perfectly packaged Victor no one saw coming, and here you were, everyone’s favorite from last year 
Getting with you was his best means of protection from late nights with Capitol dwellers who leer at him wherever he goes
Finnick has always been a particularly beautiful liar, and the Capitol romantics just ate up the idea that their beloved District Four Victors would end up together
He messed up, though, he fell in love when he wasn’t supposed to
Maybe he was just too good at playing the game, maybe that was why Finnick stopped caring when the cameras were on and off and started just loving you every moment of every day 
You had a way of looking at him that Finnick hadn’t experienced in a long time, like you were seeing past the skin and bone to whoever was made up of his heart and mind
He sits with you by the water, watches the sun set, and thinks maybe it wouldn’t be the worst to live the rest of his life with someone after all
No one bats an eye when you move into his house, when Finnick slips and refers to himself by your last name instead of his, when the only thing either of you fear is the other being taken from you
Finnick fears weakness, he fears dependency, but he never feels anything but strong when he’s with you 
After a while, he asks you to give up the ruse and love him for real 
You could never say anything but yes :))
hunger games tag list: @w1shes43, @ilovexavierthrope
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juuuulez · 3 months
Note
showing them your party dress, and they judge you (thinking it’s slutty or they get jealous) and won’t come to the deannas party with you. you get drunk and they help u 😝😝😝 (comfort angst)
info: Rick Grimes x Reader, NSFW, sorta drunk sex, Spencer is a creep, unsafe sex/pulling out, p in v.
summary: After pissing you off over a comment about your outfit, Rick tries to prove your worth another way.
omg idk when this escalated into smut but it did, but thanks for the request!!! thought i’d show rick some love because he’s soooo dilf and there isn’t enough rick appreciation on this page
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You wrap your hair around the curling iron, clamping down the hot metal and holding it in place. Tonight, Deanna is having a party for the new residents, and you’d been practically buzzing with excitement all day. Not only was Alexandria a miracle to come across, but they treated life with some semblance of normality.
“That the dress you’re wearin’?” A voice behind you asks, your gaze fluttering up to watch Rick through the mirror. He’s standing behind you, eyes scanning the dress you’d put on.
It was black, form-fitting and short. Paired with some kitten heels, you looked good enough to eat. Except, you’d thought it would illicit a bit more… excitement from your boyfriend.
“Yeah,” You agree, “Rosita found it for me. Said I’d look good in it.”
As if to prove your point, you turn around, giving a little spin in an almost childish manner. Rick stands there, stone faced, not betraying a single emotion.
“You do,” He finally lets up, “But is this the impression we wanna give?”
A response doesn’t come right away, silence filling the space between you as the words stew in your mind. They sound strangely negative, causing your brows to furrow into a little frown.
“C’mon, baby. You know what I mean.” Rick tries again, having sensed that he’s said something wrong.
But you’ve already turned away, continuing to primp your hair in the mirror. “Are you coming tonight?” You ask, completely avoiding his previous misstep for the sake of not becoming upset before the party.
“No, not tonight,” Rick sighs, “Got some shit to sort out.”
This one doesn’t get a reply either, and Rick knows that you aren’t pleased. So far, your relationship has been anything but normal. Back at the prison, he’d kept you at an arms length, finding your alluring nature and sweet smile threatening to his morals. Yet, over time, he’d let you in, and you’d wormed your way into his life.
“You could stay home, too. Wait for me. We’ll watch a movie when I get home.” He ends up suggesting, trying to alleviate your souring mood.
It’s fruitless, for you’re still persisting. “No. I want to party, like every other person in this town.”
“In that dress?” He questions once more.
You turn again, shooting the older man a glare. “Yes. Now leave, I’m getting ready, and you’re distracting me.” You essentially demand, and as not to get bitten, Rick obeys.
Part of you is pissed that he folded so easily, even though it was your bad temper. Regardless, you swore to have fun tonight, Rick or no Rick.
So, you finished doing your hair, even going so far as to put a little makeup on. It felt good, all of it, mainly because it just felt normal. You ventured from your house, trailing down the street to where the commotion was, eager to have a fun night out and remove Rick’s comment from your mind.
Though you claimed to be over it, your actions were saying otherwise.
Alcohol wasn’t commonplace during the apocalypse, at least not for your group. It wasn’t a necessity, and would only worsen the burden of surviving, having to recover from hangovers or be momentarily inebriated.
But tonight? You’d drink as much as you wanted to. Wine had never really been your favourite, but now, it was like liquid gold.
Maybe you were still annoyed at Rick, and you certainly were annoyed at Spencer, who kept talking to you at every possible opportunity. He didn’t like Rick, so in favour, you didn’t like him.
Everything turned into a blur at one point, and you would vaguely remember sitting down on the couch, nursing a cup of water in hand. Who gave you water? It didn’t really matter, for once more, Spencer had sat next to you.
He offered you another glass of wine, and stupidly, you took it.
“Ever get bored of playing with your old man?” He asked, lips upturned into a wicked grin, like the joke was supposed to be amusing. It wasn’t.
There’s a sickly feeling in your stomach, though it doesn’t stem from the alcohol, but guilt. “I need some air.” You end up mumbling, uncoordinatedly stumbling from the couch.
Spencer follows a few steps behind you, his hand on your arm with the feinted intention of helping.
“Without you!” You clarify in a drunken yell, messily yanking both heels from your feet, leaving them in the hallway while you make a break for the door.
Fortunately, Spencer gets the message.
Not that it mattered, for there was another face you didn’t want to see, waiting right outside.
Rick looked so good in the little police uniform they’d given him, with his clean shaven face and trimmed hair. It was a completely different man from the one you’d known, but delicious nonetheless.
“I don’t need your help, asshole.” You snap whilst faltering down the steps, barefoot on the pavement. Right now, he didn’t deserve the satisfaction of helping you, or knowing how good he looked.
“Yes you do, c’mon.” Rick persists, and when he moves to take your arm, you don’t protest. Maybe you are a little far gone. He gently leads you along, one hand wrapped around your shoulder, the other carefully tugging the bottom of your dress down a little more.
It’s a short walk back home, to the little picket-fenced house you’ve been living in. The instance you’re inside, you collapse on the couch, melting into the fabric and willing to pass out right then and there.
Rick kneels down on the ground, leaning in and removing your jewellery. Necklace, earrings, bracelet. Once they’re all set aside, he sits on the couch, the movement causing you to rise with a little frown.
“What’s wrong, baby?” He asks, large hands scooping under your thighs and manoeuvring your body into his lap.
When you only look down, he grips at your chin, forcing the eye contact. The frown deepens, though now out of defiance, still drunk and a little pissed off.
“We’ve spent so long bein’ dirty ‘n muddy ‘n gross..” You begin in a mumble, the words coming out as one long sigh. “I just wanted to feel sexy.”
“You are so sexy,” Rick urges, hand caressing your side. “Always.”
“Then you should’ve come to the party with me.” You retort, that sad look still on your face, and it takes everything in Rick not to kiss it off.
“I know, I know. I should’ve been there,” He agrees, “And I should’ve told you how damn good this dress looks on you.”
Your nose scrunches up in confusion, “I thought you didn’t like it.”
Rick finally releases his grip on your chin, skating both hands down the smooth curve of your sides, all nicely contained in that skimpy dress. It’s like a perfect package, one he wants to unwrap.
“You’re fuckin’ gorgeous, baby. I love it,” He reveals, eyes locked onto yours, “But I wanna be the only one who can love it.”
A grin finally grows on your lips, still all pink and glossy from the makeup. Even in your drunken state, there’s something alluring about the way you lean closer, breath fanning over Rick’s lips.
“Then prove it.” You whisper.
Like a moth to a flame, Rick bites. He closes the gap, savouring your sloppy kisses as you devour his lips, hands fumbling to cup either side of his smooth face. Somehow, kissing him felt even better drunk, like everything else just melted away.
Disconnecting, Rick trailed purposeful kisses down your neck, sucking brief marks into your skin, staking his claim. He peeled the straps of the dress down, pushing the fabric down under the swell of your breasts, until they were completely bare to him.
You gasped as his lips trapped a nipple, fondling at the supple flesh whilst worshipping you with his mouth. But you were already strung tight, not having the patience to deal with a night of teasing.
Fingers hooked into his belt, painted nails scratching at the denim as you failed to muster enough coordination to unzip him. “Please.. please, Rick.” You whined.
“I know, baby. Don’t have’ta beg tonight.” He assures you in that rough, yet soothing tone, taking over and pulling his cock free of its restraints.
Rick pushes the dress up over your hips, the soft fabric now simply a band around your waist. You’re eager to take him, arms wrapping around his broad shoulders whilst you hover over his thighs, allowing Rick to line you up and make the slide easier.
The drunken haze has faded some, replaced by a blanket of arousal as you slowly ride him, fingers gripping at his shirt. You’re saying something, begging probably, but it doesn’t make any sense. Not that it matters.
Though you’re set on riding him, Rick knows you’re probably sore from those heels all night, so he grips tight at your hips to flip you over, drilling you down into the plush couch.
“Fuck..” You gasp, head lolling to the side as Rick bites into the flesh of your neck, body completely surrounding you as his thrusts become powerful and short, angled up right where you need it.
“I know, baby. You can take it.” He grunts, using all his strength to draw you closer to the edge.
By now, he knows your tells. The tightening of your cunt as it squeezes him, the way your legs wrap around his slim waist. Whatever words make it from your mouth, though unintelligible, take on a whiny pitch.
Rick snakes his hand between you, pressing firm, tight circles around your clit that make you gasp and squirm under him. “Quietly, baby. You can do it. Let go for me.”
And that you do, hips bucking upwards as your peak finally hits, muffling your cries into his shoulder. The pulsating around his dick causes Rick to finally falter, managing a few more staggered, sharp thrusts before roughly pulling out and spilling onto your stomach. Spurts of white cum coat the bunched up dress, some even reaching the underside of your tits.
“Fuck,” Rick pants, catching his breath. “Looks like you can’t wear this dress anyway.”
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dazai-ritualist · 17 days
Note
Omg ! I didn't think you'd actually respond !! We're gonna fly away from here is easily one of the best ones in the series!! It's so Twisted and disturbing but almost domestic... (Also tysm for including my name idea in your story, Idk where it came from, I just liked it and I appreciate you!) I digress. I've returned with a concept. Al almost always has a plan when he does something. I don't know where you want to go with the second child but this won't be too focused on that one...for now. I really liked how you interpreted Alastor being a weasel and weaseling his way back into the families life and was thinking about how many I wonder about if he has a plan right now, like not a long term one, obviously, but a very specific one for a 'short term'. Women back then, especially in the south weren't allowed to have bank accounts so finicial trapping works well in this case. Also just kinda the ability to turn their kids against her would be enough to terify me. People talk about the 1950's housewife, but oh my god, 1920's housewives were a new kind of depressed. I, personally, don't think Alastor is the type of physically abuse women. No, he's far too classy for that. Instead, like I said, I think he'd either use his status in their house to trap his wife. We were able to run away while we were pregnant and alone, but we have a child now...and would we be willing to leave our child with him? No, I don't think I would, personally. This was just me rambling. K, love u, currently hyperfixated on this au. Byeee !!!! _ Cherry Anon!
DON’T REALLY WANT NO TRUST FUND BABY
[before reading this, read the rest of the story!]
— seems as if alastor found out your little secret
— UR TOO SWEET I SC THIS ON MY IG STORY AND YAPPED TO MY BOY BSF FOR AN HOUR AB IT IM BLUSHING SO HARDDDD!! ABUSE WAS LIT MY LAST SOCIAL STUDIES LESSON FOR THE SCHOOL YEAR MY TCH YAPPED AB FINANCE SO HARD 🤭🤭
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being married to alastor, the radio show host is quite the sensation in your town. but, behind the closed curtains, alastor did things that would’ve made lucifer shake in his boots.
no, he didn’t hit you. his mother would kill him if he hit his wife. but, just because alastor never hit you, didn’t mean he didn’t abuse you.
he tormented you in the worst way possible, through noah. and now, emilia.
it’s been 3 years. your little emilia lives up to her name, a cute little girl who’s eager to win. and, little noah is now a big boy, double digits and all.
and, since you’ve returned back to his house, alastor has done nothing but twist your babies’ minds. ‘once upon a time, mama wanted to run away from daddy… so, she ran away and took big brother with her. daddy was sooo worried for mama and big brother though… daddy was able to track mama down, and took her home!’ he cooed to your daughter, bouncing her in his arms— with you right beside him!
you wanted to yell; scream. of course, emilia was too young to understand what alastor was saying. but, still— the fact that he was trying to tell your children that he was some sort of white knight who saved you from yourself. you wanted nothing less, but to snap that neck of his like a twig.
you really shouldn’t act so brashly though. to outsmart alastor, you have to think like him. think of what’s smarter in long run.
alastor was ‘kind’ enough to give you an allowance. $200 every week for groceries and whatever you may need. he’s even so kind as to let you have some ‘private bonding’ with noah and emilia as they accompany you to the farmer’s market.
thankfully, you had a father who wanted to make his little girl survived even without a husband. and so, you had to hear all of his ramblings about finance. saving about 45% each week for 3 years… was about $14,000!
if you saved just a little more, you’d be semi-financially independent until you can get a proper job to take care of your children. it was run-away money, so to speak.
you hid the money in noah’s room. after all, who would expect money there? especially $14,000? and, it worked, for a while. every monday, while you tucked him into bed, you brought the money with you and hid it behind his dresser.
until, what had seemed like a normal tuesday. you came home from the tailor’s, getting back a dress that noah accidentally tore. when you came home, it was only two hours after noon. and despite that, alastor was home.
“a-alastor..! what are you doing home so early? you have a broadcast in 2 hours…” you narrowed your eyes at alastor, on the floor with your children, many new toys surrounding them. “ah, darling! i decided to pick up our children early, and we may have splurged on our little shopping spree…” he smugly grinned. “oh..? where’d you get the money?” you raised your eyebrow, closing the door and laying your bearings on the dining table.
“funniest story ever, my love! there was a random stash of money in noah’s room! seems as if the tooth fairy came early!” he laughed. random stash of money in noah’s room..? “oh. i see.” your breath stopped for a minute, thinking of what kind of consequences could come from it.
“do you have any idea how that money landed there?” he side-eyed you, expecting a lie. “perhaps it was from the old owners? you know this house, there’s so many secrets in here.” you said. “i see… i suppose you are right, darling!” he giggled.
you were back on square one. financially dependent on your husband, if you could even call him ‘husband’. as you climbed up the stairs, you heard alastor whisper to your son. “you see that? momma lied. she got less talkative when papa asked her a question.”
this is what alastor’s been teaching your son. as much as you want to protest, you did lie.
oh, how much you wished for much more simpler times. playing with your baby boy in the kitchen as you make little treats together for his snack at school. and now, the boy alastor’s turning him into— a cunning sociopath, the lord only knows what he will teach your daughter.
this is just a minor setback, it has to be.
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the--rebel--fae · 26 days
Note
HELLO!!!
do u think I could ask for some angst->fluff for nightmares for the Diasomnia boys?
(twisted wonderland)
A/N: Hiya, my dear! First off, I'd like to say I'm so so sorry for the late response to your request. Life's been...hectic, to say the least, and I'm still getting the hang of trying to do proper time management. Anyhoot! Thanks so much for the request! I really enjoyed writing this one. Tbh, I love these boys so much and have been getting back into the Twist fandom again, so yea 💜 Well my friend, I hope the wait was worth it! Enjoy!
Pairing: Diasomnia boys x Reader
Tw: None! Just pure fluff!
Word Count: 607
Chase The Nightmares Away - Bad Dream Comfort Headcanons
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Lilia
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First up, we have our lovely bat dad. We all know he’d probably be the perfect person to go to for nightmares.
He’s bat dad for a reason y’all.
When you walk in he’s probably still up, probably playing video games. 
So when you mumble you couldn’t sleep because of nightmares, he’s pulling up a chair, getting you a blanket, and snacks. Everything you need, peepaw has it. 
Wanna talk about what happened? No worries, he’s helped Silver, Sebek, and Malleus many times with their nightmares.
“Little bat? Are you alright? Ah, a nightmare. There’s no need to worry, why don’t you come sit by me and we can play this new video game together? And if you want, you can tell me about what happened.”
Sebek
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Sebek, yea..good luck on getting some comfort from him. But he’ll try his best!
He’ll probably be like: Human what are you doing in here? Oh, you had a nightmare? Uhm, why are you here then?
Poor boy would be so confused.
He’ll definitely point out how weak humans are, but then I think when he sees you truly upset, he’d feel it as his duty as a knight to protect “those weaker than him”. At least that’s the excuse he’s playing when we both know the crocodile boy cares in his own tsun-tsun way.
“Human? Why are you here so late? A nightmare? I do suppose a human would be bugged by something like that. Fae are much stronger. O-oh I didn’t mean to make you more upset. Ahem, well, as my duty as a knight in training I’ll do you the service of protecting you. You should be honored. Here, you can borrow my Malleus-Sama plush. I made it myself! It looks just like the young lord, doesn’t it?”
Silver
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Ah yes, our sleepy little prince Silver. If this boy is actually awake for once I think he’d do a pretty good job at comforting you.
I can see him as the type to have a lot of blankets so he’d probably give you one to snuggle with as comfort.
I could also see him get some of his little animal friends to comfort you too if you wanted that. 
And if you wanted to talk about your nightmare, he’d be all ears, at least until he’d fall back asleep. But, I bet he’d do his best to fight back the sleepiness as long as possible for you.
“Oh, Prefect. You’re up late. What’s that? You had a nightmare? I’m sorry, not sleeping well is never a good thing. Here, I have some extra blankets, and we can even get some of my animal friends here if you’d like. Don’t worry, it was just a dream, you’re ok now.”
Malleus
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Ah, our Housewarden of Diasomnia, the future ruler of Briar Valley. Malleus Draconia. Our sweet draconic prince.
I think he’d care the most but not know whatever the loving hell what to do.
Does this man even get nightmares?
Walks around the Night Raven campus is definitely going to happen the second you tell him what’s wrong. Nothing solves problems better than a nice walk in some fresh air.
He’ll probably even tell you stories about his time in Briar Valley to distract you or even let you play with Gao Gao Dragon-kun!
10/10 best person to go to for comfort aside from Lilia.
“Child of Man? What’s the matter? You seem upset. Oh, a nightmare? Yes, those can be troubling. How about we take a walk outside and if you feel up to it, you can talk about it. It's better than being alone. I'll even let you play with Gao-Gao Dragon-kun.”
Well, that's it for these headcanons! I hope you enjoyed them! It was a lot of fun to write! And again, so sorry for the delay! Feel free to request again!
And if you guys want even more stories--like maybe your own personalized several-page long one-shots or even a multi-chap fic take a look at my Etsy Shop! I do commissions! I even have listings for Twisted wonderland!
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gradientsys · 1 year
Text
thinking about how important rose asking roxy if she liked wizards was, and how important her answer was. by roxy saying she actually does love wizards it kinda forces rose to recontextualise every action mom took with the new lens that she actually DID like wizards and it wasn't nearly the passive aggressive gesture rose thought. it's 100% clear that interests were transferred between each kid's alpha and beta counterpart, that much is obvious, so with rose now knowing that roxy actually did like wizards, its possible for her and us to assume that for the most part, everything mom lalonde did was out of genuine care for rose, but saddled with the pressure of the end of the world and a susceptibility to alcoholism, she just had no idea how to show it, and still wanted to give rose what she saw as a normal, feminine childhood (one that she never had if u want to get transgender.) and shit like this makes me LOVE homestuck to DEATH because you can glean and interpret literally so much about rose, roxy, and mom lalonde from these lines
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and sure rose does explicitly say that it puts a lot of things into perspective about roxy and mom but the same thing applies here. rose says that its her fault pretty lightly, but there's so much more to it. rose has gone from holding so much bitter contempt for her mother to idolising roxy (and obviously mom posthumously) as her perfect mother who little rose just couldn't understand. this journey of blaming herself started with her drinking on the meteor and meeting roxy is the next milestone in it. it's just the perfect encapsulation of roses own loathing, either she projects her hatred onto her surroundings, or inward. she projects her hatred for being caged and her need to be seen by blowing up sburb gates and aggressively rejecting sburbs quests. she then projects it outward against kanaya and jade in small amounts, and then onto jack resulting in her death. (obviously there was other motivations for how rose acted with kanaya and jack - a crush and jack murdering her mother - but rose chronically needs to be seen and needs attention, which she got from kanaya meddling into her problems like a concerned mother would #mommyissues and jack killing mom was a highly extreme tipping point in her turn towards the horrorterrors.) the same pattern happens with mom. rose sees mom as a passive aggressive hag who simply didn't understand rose and sought to make her life difficult, but now she's a loving mother who rose just couldn't appreciate as a child. both of her viewpoints are based around something that a singular party couldn't do, rather than a more holistic approach. again she projects outwards and then inwards, and it's so important how she does this. and there is some truth to her view of mom post-meeting roxy! we can interpret that mom lalonde was a kind hearted, well intentioned mother who really loved rose and played roses games to feel closer to her daughter, but she was 100% an unfit mother, and rose is unable to accept the nuanced outlook - mom lalonde was by all means a caring person who really did love rose and care about her interests, but rose was still absolutely neglected/abused by mom lalonde. and personally, i think it is SO important that rose thinks this. the fact that the characters in homestuck are kids is obviously imperative, and I think roses evolution in thinking about her mother is such a raw microcosm in a child not being able to accept that they genuinely were abused, even with evidence to the contrary. it's also a testament to just how thematically rich and rife with content to analyse homestuck is, and just how amazingly subtle it can be. hussie absolutely glosses over serious subjects like this in a kind of slapdash way sometimes, roses alcoholism is a pretty big example, but forgetting the author entirely, it's an incredibly compelling way to show a scared, traumatised child trying desperately to understand her upbringing and her parent. i think rose would still be pretty stubborn about it into earth c days, but I feel like she would definitely accept it in time. she'd probably have a similar arc to jade honestly, because she too has so much to accept in regards to her childhood being Bad, Actually. dave would also provide insight on this and living with kanaya, the person she projected her desperate, gnawing need for motherly care on when she was 13, would definitely give her an environment and perspective to reconcile with her having a bad childhood. with a decent support network and Actually facing her internal hatred and biases, probably kicking and screaming because that's just how rose is, rose would be able to accept that mom lalonde neglected her
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glass-noodle · 8 months
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What would a role reversed merman AU scenario be like? And most impotant, what kind of fish species would Hank be? (Not meant as a drawing request or super elaborate essay or anything, I just love reading your ideas ✨️)
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I know you said this isn't a drawing/essay request but HOW COULD I RESIST!!!
I am not a fish expert but I like to think of Hank being either a dwarf gourami (for that good ol' in-game symbolism hehe) or a tiger shark, because stripes and big teeth and bad temper. Or maybe he could be some sort of tropical fish that's super vibrant and colourful, yet also deadly (poisonous fin spikes?). Marine biologists please weigh in!!!
Some half-formed unofficial notes:
Hank is more outwardly aggressive towards Kamski and the scientists in comparison to Connor’s cold-shoulder approach. They went through their entire tranquilizer supply in the first few months just to get a handle on the roaring, thrashing beast of a merman, and he’s caused more than a few major injuries amongst their team. Just like Connor, he bares his teeth and resists every time they come to take him for experiments; they have to sedate him from a greater distance and with a much heavier dose than they use for Connor, however.
Hank is a little less malnourished than Connor, but only because he doesn't refuse to eat. He's still thinner and weaker than he would be normally
Connor works the night shift. Not sure if it’s because he has another job during the daytime or if he’s going to school, but either way he manages to catch up on sleep during his breaks. He sacrifices this sleep once he and Hank start growing closer, however.
Hank takes much longer to warm up to Connor than the reverse. He snarls and snaps his teeth whenever Connor gets too close; it takes weeks for Connor to be able to approach the edge of the tank. He has to leave the fresh fish on the deck and back away before Hank will even look at it, ice-blue eyes narrowed with suspicion.
Connor is a bit more hesitant to get close to Hank, but that's only because he's always taken his job seriously and he doesn't like breaking the rules. He can't help but stare in awe whenever the large merman swims by, however, vibrant fins flashing and his muscled body cutting powerfully through the water. It's only when Connor starts noticing the scientists taking Hank away - and his glimpses of Hank's violent resistance - that his curiosity and empathy override his sense of obedience and his desire to make a good first impression.
Because Hank doesn't talk, Connor is given even more of an opportunity than usual to run his mouth. He blabbers away, asking question after question as if Hank could answer, sometimes philosophizing and sometimes talking about nothing at all. Hank tries to tune him out as he eats, but the human is annoyingly persistent. Eventually he grows used to the babble, but only after he starts begrudgingly warming up to the kid.
Because Connor talks so damn much, it's alarming when he goes quiet. Hank initiates contact for the first time by taking off his glasses when he has his breakdown. It's the first time Hank has ever been so close to him.
I think that Hank would still have lost Cole when he was a baby mer; possibly to humans and their trapping practices, giving him even more of a reason to hate them. I'm torn on what Connor's backstory should be, though. Perhaps he lost Nines (to an ocean storm?)? Or maybe it’s post-fight with Amanda and he’s feeling directionless in life, suffocating under the weight of his family’s expectations and feeling like he’s a burden and a disappointment despite everything that he’s achieved? Maybe it’s just a good ol’ panic attack because I love forcing anxiety onto human!Connor (no I’m not projecting what do u mean)
Hank's power and girth take on a whole new light after they’ve grown close. Connor is more distracted during their time together, his stream of chatter faltering uncharacteristically whenever Hank shifts a certain way or rips into a fish easily with his powerful jaws. He swallows when he imagines the full strength of the merman pressing him down against the deck, of Hank dragging him into the water and grazing those razor-sharp teeth along his skin, tail wrapped around his body like a serpent and trapping him in place.
Hank could hold the skinny human down with one hand. He knows he could. He imagines wide dark eyes staring up at him, skin flushed prettily and neat brown hair dripping, wordless for once in his life, and nearly loses his self-control. If they were both mermen, he'd be courting the kid to the ends of the ocean. Or...maybe Connor would be the one wooing him. He's certainly brought him enough fish and stared at his chest and arms enough that any merperson worth their salt would consider it mate-like behaviour. It's a weird cognitive dissonance to be feeling this way about a human, but Connor is — Connor is different. Hank likes Connor; he likes him so much that it's stupid.
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izukuisbaby · 1 year
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⊹˚.⋆ 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 - NANAMI KENTO
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℘. flora's notes : y'all know I'm a simp 4 this angel daddy so obviously i had to do that, totally self indulgent, I need him in my life
℘. female, gn, male reader 💓
m.list | comment or reblog if you enjoyed !
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℘. he doesn't fall in love easily but when he does, it's forever. he will do it all with you : getaway weekends, expensive dates, engagement, marriage, honeymoon to your dream destination... everything you've ever dreamt of, he gets it for you.
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℘. he adores 80's romantic music and has a whole playlist that he listens to on his way to and back from work. it makes him think of you, it encourages him to go through his day and it gets him excited to go home to you in the evening.
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℘. he's the kind of boyfriend who remembers the little things about you and he doesn't need to write them down, he just has good memory. he keeps good care of everything related to you, little things included. sometimes he will come up to you like "I remembered you liked silk pyjamas so I bought you a pair darling" AND YOU'RE LIKE "HOW DOES HE KNOW ???" and he listens to you with such great care and intense attention 🥲🥲 HIS TIME IS DEDICATED TO U
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℘. you're always his plus one at his events. he chooses your outfit and he never misses cuz he knows your tastes perfectly. also what colours suits you and what type of attire fits you the best. if you're okay with it and if your hair is long enough, he will braid your hair and put flowers in it, rapunzel style yk. he loves to touch your hair and try hairstyles on you<3 (i headcanon that he doesn't have any socials but facebook and he saves the hair tutorials he sees on his feed to try them on you)
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℘. he looks at bedsheets and spreads a lot because he wants your shared bedroom to be as comfortable as possible for you. he will choose one w ur fav color or a design that would match the aesthetic of your room. the bedroom is his safe place and he wants it to be yours too
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℘. loves having you on his lap while he reads in his home office. and he kisses your forehead and cheeks every now and then. he reads you the story/article aloud when you get sleepy so he gets to have you sleep on his chest or shoulder
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℘. one of his favourite things is to get in the shower with you after a long day at work. nothing sexual, just him hugging you from behind while he softly rubs soap on your body. it just calms him down to have your skin touch his with the warmth of the water surrounding you
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℘. YOU ARE A PRETTY PASSENGER, he drives you everywhere even if that means dropping you off 3 hours away and he has to do the drive back to get u home
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℘. insists on getting heaters that can be started from a phone so that he's sure you always come to a warm home in the winter. he cannot stand the thought of you alone and cold in the house while he's working. your shared home has to be your safe haven, it must be warm and cosy !
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℘. makes time 4 you whatever the reason. feeling sick at work ? he has his afternoon off now. there's this TV show you really want to watch ? let's watch it together. a new restaurant opened in town ? he's taking you on a date.
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℘. after a long day, he will lay you down in the couch in front of ur fav tv show and run you a bath
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℘. wants you to visit him at work because he loves eating with you (eating the bento you made him). he will always welcome you with a smile as he sees you enter his office and he often signals you to come sit on his lap. he secures an arm around your waist and kisses your forehead then lips and gives u the most sincere smile i have to stop there before i start smiling like an idiot at my screen
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℘. SPOILS U !!! 'nami has so much love to give it's insane, he will grant any of your wishes right then and there ! he needs to be assured that he makes you happy and fulfills your dream life, it's important to him that you are comfortable with him as your partner. plus, he will never get bored of that smile and blush you get whenever he gets you a little something
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© izukuisbaby. comments appreciated ! although do not modify, translate, copy, claim as your own or repost on any app/platform/social media (this applies to all of my content)
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coolprettyleo · 2 months
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Don't Forget, Don't Forget About Me - Gabe Perreault ☆
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wc: 1.9k
tw: angst. alcohol. kissing? cussing. partying. almost sa. slut shaming. weird frat guy.
part 2 of superman !!
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
gabe hadn’t called. he hadn’t texted. it was now sunday night; the night before he was supposed to land back in boston and lottie wondered if he had even thought of her.
her little overthinking insecure mind couldn’t help but hope he wouldn’t go off and save some other girl. a girl who desperately needed saving just like the naive little freshmen lottie was a couple of months prior.
*flashback*
“c’mon!! we’re in college now, you have to actually leave your dorm if you want to make friends char” her best friend from home told her while they were face timing.
i mean its not that lottie liked to stay home. she kinda felt burnt out. her whole life she didn’t have strict authority figures who told her she couldn’t go out. so by the time she was eighteen years old in a new city she didn’t feel the hunger of freeness, every other eighteen year old was feeling.
she grew up with her grandmother in california who had already done her part in raising her children. she was raising lottie out of the kindness of her heart. or mainly due to the fact lottie would be in the foster care system since both her parents were in jail.
“i dont know what if something goes wrong” she says, beginning to look like she can be convinced seeing how cute dylan looks.
it might be fun to dress up and take cute pics…
“it’s college! you finally have the opportunity to be somewhere where no one knows you. you can talk freaking australian and stupid bitches would believe you. your just like every other bitch tonight!”
lottie couldn’t help but smile at her friends drunkness desperately regretting the fact she didn’t go to umich with the blonde friend.
“honestly thats so real and tru. when the hell did u start giving such good advice”
“shutup and let me help you pick a fit” dylan excitedly squeals.
lottie walked into a frat party alongside her roommate and some girls they had just met. the music was typical frat music but she was honestly feeling it.
maybe because she missed going out or maybe because her and her friends had just pregamed a bottle of titos before leaving the dorm.
the thing about lottie is that she doesn’t usually drink so when she does, she drinks to have a good time.
“oh my gosh!! charlotte pls let’s go dance. plsss” my roommate Mary slurred whining.
lottie was obviously not going to turn that invitation down, so off she went. unbeknownst to her she had already caught the attention of several guys with the worse intentions possible.
all lottie can remember of that part of the night is that she was dancing with mary having the time of her life and then the next thing she knew, mary was making out with some guy.
okay mary!! slay!
she didn’t want to awkwardly third wheel that, so she quickly made her way out the dance floor. into the kitchen where there were several tall guys standing around with red cups.
“hey charlotte right? we have english together” a shorter boy walked up to her. lottie didn't think he was with the taller boys.
ive never seen this man in my life.
but of course she was naive. and in her little naive mind she didn’t want to make this random guy feel bad so she went along with it. as if they were old friends. they weren’t.
“oh yeah! hi!” she told the black haired boy standing way too close for her comfort.
unbeknownst to lottie he didn’t actually have a class with her and he was just another dumb freshman hoping to get into a frat, trying to prove he was somebody to a bunch of nobodies. in all the wrong ways too. he had just been ordered to slip something into her drink.
why he chose lottie, she would never know.
“here let me get you some water, you don’t look too well”
“thanks!! thats so nice! I was just dancing with my roommate but I don’t know where she went, I think she went off with some guy which is totally fine! im not judging or anything, like good for her” lottie drunkly rambled. one thing about lottie is that she becomes a yapper with just one sip of alcohol.
“ya it can get pretty tiring out there” he said looking around and at her nervously handing her some ‘water’. or so she thought.
as lottie was about to pour the liquid down her throat a tall dark haired boy came and slapped the cup out of her hand. spilling it all over the floor and on her top.
what the hell man
“im so sorry but don’t drink that. here” he said handing her a bottled water desperately searching for a towel to give her to wipe off whatever the hell that liquid was which smelled like the farthest thing from water.
“cmon man i was already talking to her and it was just water” the frat boy said grabbing lottie harshly.
“get the fuck out of here ass hat. how stupid can you be”
"that wasn't water!"
the taller boy and i yelled at the same time while the frat boy shoved him.
“don’t fucking touch me or her” he said pushing him back. harder.
"she's pretty easy to touch man, I mean look at her" the frat guy drunkly said.
the tall dark haired boys friends quickly came and got between them before something bigger started.
“cmon gabe it’s not worth it” a freckled boy said to him while shooting a dangerous glare to the stupid frat guy.
lottie just stood off leaned against the counter trying to figure out who’s the hell are these people? and what the hell was going on? and did that asshole just slut shame her? what the hell did he even mean by that? .
“let’s go find your friends” he said taking my arm much gentler and guiding me through the party. trying to see if I recognized anyone.
“thank you for that, honestly. i didn’t think anyone could ever be capable of doing something like that” I told the boy who had gentler eyes now as we stepped outside. as lottie began to sober up, it hit her what could of happened if this mysterious boy never came to save the day.
im so dumb.
lottie couldnt help but think.
“well now you know for next time right” he said with a light smile as he texted on his phone.
whose he texting?
“who we texting!” lottie said jokingly. trying to lighten up the mood.
“im trying to call us an uber, your a freshman right?” he said with a chuckle, feeling a flip in his stomach as he seen her smile.
thats pretty.
“yeah, are you?”
“yeah, my names gabe by the way” he said realizing he never got her name or even told her his.
“charlotte. but i go by lottie” she said smiling at him, noticing gabe was honestly cute.
“the uber is fifteen minutes away” he said looking down at her, into her big brown eyes.
“thank you. really” she said starring into each others eyes, as if they’ve spent all eighteen years of their lives searching for one another.
feeling her heart beat a million times an hour; something lottie has never felt before. so she couldn’t figure out what it meant. heart attack? maybe?
lord save me.
*flashback over*
lottie felt like an idiot. she knew gabe was back from his trip seeing as his location was in his dorm. he usually would have asked her to go over by now or he would of came here, but seeing as he probably believed lottie didn't love him; he was going to be stubborn and not answer her.
screw it I cant take it anymore
lottie rolled her ass out of bed and put on her uggs as she marched down the hill to his dorm with a mission on her mind.
she had spent the weekend wallowing in self pity and she couldn't take it anymore. this had been the longest they had gone without speaking to one another since they got together and lottie realized she did not like it. not one bit.
"gabe just call her back, if she's calling you so much then she obviously does care about you" will snapped finally tired of seeing his roommate in such a terrible mood; all weekend.
"thats the problem! i want her to love me not just care for me. you guys know lottie; she cares for the homeless man down the street that she's never even met before!" gabe gestures with his arms.
"dont be complicated gabe" ryan chimes in, knowing all too well how their friend and teammate is.
as gabe opens his mouth to talk further he is cut off by a loud knock on the door.
ryan quickly trying to escape gabes self pity party practically runs to open the door while will and gabe stay sitting back on the couch.
"lottie! come in!" ryan says loudly looking at will with eyes that speak 'lets get outta here'. will practically ran out with ryan. not wanting to deal with depressed gabe any longer, not before waving at lottie on his way out though.
gabe rolled his eyes at their antics before getting up and walking to his room as lottie began to shut the front door.
"gabe wait! please hear me out"
"there's nothing to hear out lottie. its okay to not love someone back, you dont have to explain anything" he said looking anywhere and everywhere but her.
lottie took a good look at him seeing as he looked like his heart was breaking into a million pieces; lottie wanting so desperatly to put it back together one by one, however long it took. she loved him.
"you cant honestly believe that I dont love you gabe" lottie said softly, walking closer to him.
"look at me gabe" she whispered, while softly turning his head down to look at her. his deep green eyes has her wanting to scream from the rooftops.
"I love you" she said as she shook with nothing but raw emotion and pure love.
gabe couldn't help but scoop her up into his arms and kiss his girl like there was no tomorrow. smiling into the kiss because he hated what he had felt all weekend long.
lottie pulled away from the kiss as she wasn't finished. she planned the speech the whole way here, she wanted to tell him. because when you know you know and she knew.
"I love you gabriel perreault. and im sorry for not telling you sooner. i just assumed you knew and that was wrong of me and so sorry. since the very first day I've loved you. since you saved me from my own stupidity, I loved you. since you've put up through every bad habit and fit I've had, I've loved you-"
"lottie, i know. you dont have to say it" gabe said cutting her off knowing well lottie isn't one to scream her love from the rooftops. with his hands on her lower back. making her stomach do cartwheels.
god I love him. I want him.
"I want to though" lottie said, looking into his eyes. eyes that lottie thought were heart shaped starring deeply into her soul. leaning on her tiptoes to kiss his soft sweet lips again.
the boy who was her boyfriend. the boy she loved. the boy who knew she loved him. her version of superman. at least its the same thing too lottie.
the end!!
I dont know if I want to make this into an au or leave it as it is. we'll see!
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