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#harry styles never have i ever series
3-aem · 1 year
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Everyone in fandom constantly fighting over ships and stuff but yall haven't known true suffering until you go over the m/f side of a half dead to fully dried out fandom and are stuck drinking the dust coming out of a rusty 89 year old faucet.
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micer2012 · 5 months
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a reflection on MatPat's plagiarism
Hello, my name is Della, or micer2012, and 2 years ago Game Theory plagiarized three Tumblr posts of mine, making a video that now holds almost 6 million views.
My posts explaining his plagiarism made their rounds on Reddit, Tumblr and Twitter, but despite the Hermits and Pooka commenting on it (generally in support of me or saying they don’t know enough details about the situation to say either way), MatPat and his team have never owned up to anything, and no mention of my name is present on the video. The one Reddit post they made denying it (which was made before my detailed takedown, which they have never responded to (though the mods on the r/GameTheorists Reddit were kind and made sure it stayed up)) didn’t even mention me by name, just referring to me as “a tumblr user”. (Though one of the screenshotted comments in the body of the post does say my name)
This experience was baffling, but it’s overall had a positive impact on my life. r/Hermitcraft gave me a Golden Apple Award (post of the year, 2021). My inbox was filled with excited fans, wanting to ask me questions or pose their own theories, far more than the hate I got. (Though the hate I got from Game Theory fans was VERY funny. I wondered why none of them gave me shit about saying “MatPat misgendered Evil Xisuma” before realizing none of them read that far into the post.)
And getting on a more personal, and much more important note, I met most of my current online friends through this, including my partner. It helped me grow closer with my irl friends as well and gave me an entertaining story that I tell whenever I have the chance. It was one of the first things in my life that really made me feel like my talents, my autistic hyperfocusing and analyzing of things I love, could be valuable. Useful. Exploitable. It blew my mind that MatPat thought an autistic kid’s ramblings about a Minecraft Youtube joke character were good enough to steal. To put an audible sponsorship on. To get 6 million views off of.
And that’s why I’m writing this post, this update years later. As you might’ve been able to guess, Hbomberguy’s Youtube video on plagiarism reopened this wound. It was really hard for me to sit through, it took days of pausing and taking breaks, because I had experienced everything he was talking about firsthand. 
In my 10 page long takedown post, I wrote about how his rewording of my sentences made him say things that were incorrect, just like Filip did. The content farm production style that made big companies like Cinemassacre take one creator (AVGN/MatPat) and turn him and his content into a brand, a voice that reads out scripts by other people with other opinions/theories, is a history shared with Game Theory. What really hit me was Harris talking about how big creators only do this to people they think they can get away with doing it to. How they view their victims as lesser, as not deserving of their words, repackaging them as their own to give to an audience that can gain from hearing them, but deserves better than to have to listen to the original victim.
That’s the thing, I 100% think a video version of my theory to expose to a bigger community than “Evil Xisuma Fans on Tumblr” is a great idea!! Near the end of the video Harris talks about how video adaptations of things could be a great market, even an accessibility tool, and I completely feel that about my posts. I wrote them quickly assuming the reader was someone well versed on Evil Xisuma lore, after not even watching most of the CarnEvil series, and the diagrams I made to explain them are even less comprehensible. Harris makes a joke that I completely agree with, 
“I’m sure some of my videos would do very well if someone translated them into English.”
I don’t think I would’ve ever made my posts if I didn’t have autism, and a special fixation on Evil Xisuma and Hermitcraft. I made them because I felt the character was being done an injustice, and because I wanted to share with other superfans this theory that might explain it away. I do think that MatPat plagiarizing me was ableist. I used to wonder a lot if this would’ve happened if my posts were articulated better, if they had been peer reviewed, if the posts themselves had been spread to a wider audience before MatPat made his video. At one point when the discourse was fresh (before I had the time to write out my 10 page rebuttal), a bigger YouTuber (100k subs at the time) messaged me and started talking on Discord, interested in possibly making a video on the discourse, but I think my style of typing and general enthusiasm drove him away. You can tell by a single look at my blog (or my original 3 posts!) that I don’t usually type like this. This post you’re reading now has been peer reviewed and edited, and took me hours to format correctly. That video could’ve been huge, the entire outcome of this MatPat situation would probably be much different.
I also used to stress a lot about “being the one who ruined Evil Xisuma’s story”. If you didn’t know, to me S8 Evil Xisuma’s story got wrapped up pretty quickly and unsatisfying (in my personal autistic opinion). (though this might’ve been due to s8 being experimental and ending early with moon big) There was no real culmination of the plot points and arcs going on, and I don’t want to blame myself, but when Xisuma said on stream (when the MatPat thing was first going on) that he didn’t want to focus on the discourse or draw more attention to it, it makes a lot of sense to me that he just wanted to wrap it all up as quickly as possible. For a while I beat myself up about it, of ruining the story of this character I love, but it’s not my fault. If anyone’s, it’s MatPats, but I don’t think it’s useful to just blame someone else. That’s how the story ended up going, and that’s fine. This is Evil Xisuma we’re talking about, their inconsistent lore is what made them such an interesting character. And notably, Pooka made an animation with an awesome culmination of Jeff, the Dreamer, Evil Xisuma, and his own sona’s story, and it makes me so happy to watch. Whatever Pooka does is of course his own choice, but I’m glad he got to give this personal story his own ending (if it is an ending, and not just the start of a new chapter!). 
Typing this all out and getting it off my chest has made me feel a lot better. For a while I wanted to make my OWN video essay about Evil Xisuma’s lore and CarnEvil’s lore, actually going episode by episode to explain it instead of just assuming you knew as much about Evil Xisuma as I did. That idea is still not off the table, but MCYT isn’t something I’m that into right now. Maybe if something else comes out about Evil Xisuma I’ll get back on it, but for now I’m fine with letting that go. But I want to make other videos, share other theories and analysis… if I have the freetime I’d love to make YouTube videos, and if I don’t have the time I’ll continue posting to my tumblr and infodumping to my friends. Apparently my infodumping is valuable enough “content” to steal! Writing this out has made me feel a lot better though, I’m really glad I got it out.
If anyone ever wants to talk to me about the things I’m obsessed with, or reach out to me as a source in a bigger discussion about Game Theory or other channels, my inbox is more than welcome :] Thank you for reading! 
Sincerely, a tumblr user.
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harryslittlefreakk · 3 months
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my policeman
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Summary: Harry is the police officer assigned to your case, though you are inexplicably drawn to one another 🤭 this will be the first instalment of a new series (if you guys like it lol)
Warnings: age gap romance, Harry is approx mid 40s and MC is early-mid 20s 🥰 smut!!
A/n: I hope you enjoy!! I really like this idea & the storyline so far for these two
You can join my taglist here! And my masterlist is here!! Happy reading 🫶🏼
“I need to speak to someone please, I’ve been mugged.”
You were panting, having run the ten minute journey to the police station from the bus stop. Someone had snatched the bulky work bag from your shoulder as you walked, then fled down a side street before you’d even had time to comprehend what had happened. Your natural instincts were to just run, and that’s exactly what you did. You ran until you stumbled through the police station doors, your heart still pounding with adrenaline.
“Styles!” the man behind the desk called out, an outstretched arm directing you to a closed door. You shuffled over, legs jelly after your spontaneous sprint. You weren’t sure whether to go through the doors or wait there, and the officer behind the desk had his back to you. But as you shifted awkwardly, the doors swung open, revealing possibly the hottest police officer you’d ever seen. He was old, older than you’d usually be interested in, but there was something about him. He was stocky and toned, grey streaks peppered through his deep brown curls. He smiled at you and extended his hand. "Officer Styles, but you can call me Harry.” Officer Harry Styles, the world’s sexiest police officer. You followed him down the corridor, into a tiny room with only a desk, a chair and a small sofa. It was cold and clinical, four grey walls lit by the same sort of lights you’d find in hospitals. It made you uneasy, but Harry’s eyes were laced with warmth as he looked over at you. "First of all, are you okay?" he asked, his voice gentle.
You whispered a quiet “yes”, your response barely audible, but Harry caught it. You felt vulnerable now, having been too close to danger and not realising it at the time. You’d lived in London for years, heard so many tales of rape and mugging but never experienced it yourself, or had it happen to someone close to you. You were lucky to only have your work bag taken and be left otherwise untouched, but you couldn’t help feeling shaken by the encounter. “I was mugged,” you told Harry.
“Did they hurt you?”
“No. Just took my bag.”
“M’sorry that happened to you,” he said. There was a slight northern twang to his voice, the kind that suggested he’d been in London long enough to start losing it, but been in the North long enough for the accent to be stubborn. “Did you get a look at them?” he asked, tapping his pen against the sheet of paper in front of him.
“No, they were already running before I turned around.”
“Where did it happen?”
“The bus stop near Florence Gardens, going towards the station.”
“What did they take? Any valuables?”
“My work laptop. And my lunchbox,” you told him, corners of your mouth turning up slightly at the thought of the thief finding your leftover pasta. “They were in my rucksack, I had my phone and keys in my pocket.”
“What does the bag look like?”
“Black, it’s leather. I can show you?”
You pulled up a picture on your phone and handed it to Harry, watching as he wrote down the details.
“Alright, give me 10 minutes to file this, okay? You’ll be okay waiting here?” He handed the phone back to you and stood up as you nodded, then strode toward the door, the glinting badge on his chest catching the light. You’d never had to deal with the police before, and always been a little bit scared of authority figures. But Harry was warm, he made you feel safe despite the circumstances that had brought you to the police station.
It wasn’t long before Harry was back, a thick puffer jacket now covering his torso and a huge tote bag slung over his shoulder. He reached out and gently placed a comforting hand on the back of your seat. “Come on, my shifts over so I’ll walk you home.” You smiled as you followed him out of the room, grateful beyond words for his company.
“Do you not have worse crimes to solve than my stolen lunchbox?” you asked him as you walked, somehow comfortable in his presence. “Not anymore,” he told you. “Been in the police for 25 years now. Did a lot of that but wanted to settle down the last few years, s’better for me like this.”
“Guess it’s nicer for your wife that you’re not out chasing murderers,” you quipped, earning a chuckle from Harry. "Yeah, m’sure she’d appreciate it if she hadn’t divorced me already," he said with a small smile. “I’m sorry,” you told him, glancing over to try to read his face. Truthfully, you were excited by the idea of him being divorced. It didn’t mean he was single, and it definitely didn’t mean he’d be into you, but it was one less hurdle in your mind. "It's alright," he said. "Sometimes things jus’ don't work out, you know?”
“Mm, I know. My flat’s just down here,” you pointed the way to Harry. He walked you all the way to the doorstep, staring up at the building. “It’s not the best area,” he told you. "Be safe, okay? If you need anything, or remember anything, don't hesitate to call," Harry told you, a touch of protectiveness in his tone as he took out his phone. He sent a text to your number so you could save his, then watched as you opened the front door. “Thank you Harry, for everything,” you smiled. “I’m only a call away,” he said, rubbing a hand on your forearm.
Jesus Christ. You collapsed against your front door as you got inside, heart racing from just a gentle touch. You’d get mugged every day if it gave you the chance to be around Harry more. The thought of seeing him again made your head pound, the fear and violation you felt earlier in the evening long forgotten.
Maybe it was a reaction to the weirdness of your evening, maybe it was a way to work through all the emotions you were feeling, but you found yourself reaching for your vibrator as you stepped out of your work clothes. Harry was all you could think about, his hands trailing down your body, his fingers pinching at your nipple, his mouth pressing hot kisses across your abdomen. You could almost feel him hovering over you, so close and yet not close at all. He would be authoritative, demanding you press the vibrator to your clit, his fingers beginning to pump inside of you as you writhed on the bed.
You were moaning into the ghost of his mouth, his nose brushing against yours as your core tightened, a rush of emotions filling you to the brim. It was too much, your toy working at your clit with the idea of Harry’s ringed fingers pounding at your pussy, your free hand gripping onto his loose curls. You were coming faster than you ever had, hips bucking as you screamed out his name.
It was borderline insane. Coming so fast and so heavily for a man you barely knew, crying out his name as if he were here, riding you through your high. You felt almost dirty as you chucked your vibrator to the side, too mentally preoccupied to even shower or eat before climbing into bed. You just wanted to dream of Harry, try to work through your delusions before you had to see him again.
Your thoughts of Harry came and went over the next few days. Your manager had suggested you work from home for a few days, your only route home from the office marred by your mugging. The four walls of your apartment felt too small, too closed in even before you had an imaginary Harry following you around. You’d tried to push him out of your mind, desperate to avoid a crush on a man you hardly knew. You did this all the time, it was a symptom of being chronically single. As soon as a man showed kindness towards you, you fell in love. Harbouring a crush on the police officer working on your case was bad news, and yet as you thought about him, his name flashed up on your phone.
“Hey, y/n. How are you?”
“I’m okay, you?”
“Better for hearing your voice.” You could almost hear the smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. “Listen, do you have time to swing by? Wanted to update you on a few things.”
“I can come now?” you offered. Working from home was slow, and you’d already completed your tasks for the day. So how could you wait any longer to see Harry again?
You looked over yourself in the mirror as you put the phone down, tightening your ponytail and smoothing a hand down the front of your top.
Harry was waiting in the reception area when you arrived at the police station, a big beaming grin sitting pretty between his dimpled cheeks when he saw you. Truthfully, he could have spoken to you over the phone, but he wanted an excuse to see you again. It was silly, childlike even, the way he’d racked his brain for reasons to call or message since he’d dropped you off at home a few days ago. He felt ridiculous, far too giddy over a girl far too young for him, but he couldn’t get you off his mind.
“We think we’ve located your bag,” Harry told you as he ushered you into the same room as before. “Really?” you squeaked. “It’s not 100% yet, but we have had a few more reports of thefts in the area. We’ve tracked down an address, and we’ll be going in this week.”
“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” you grinned, throwing your arms around him before your brain could stop you. Harry chuckled, wrapping a strong arm around your shoulders. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head, before freezing. You’d both suddenly remembered where you were, who you were, and yet neither of you wanted to step away.
Harry gently squeezed you before saying, "It's all part of the job,” a small smile on his lips. There was something unspoken in the air as you stepped back, your gaze meeting his. “Sorry,” you muttered. His eyes were soft as he looked at you, reaching out to gently tuck a loose strand of your hair behind your ear.
“You don’t have to apologise,” Harry told you, his lingering touch burning against your skin. You stared at each other wordlessly for a moment, tension heavy in the air, until a familiar call of Harry’s name broke the spell. You stepped further away from him, glancing down at the floor as the professional mask settled back into place on Harry’s face. “Thank you, Harry. I’ll see you later,” you smiled, turning your back on him.
You needed to distract yourself, arranging a last minute girls night to take your mind off of Harry. And yet, it was as if the universe was playing a cruel joke on you. The man you were specifically going out to forget was standing on the doorstep of your apartment building, hand poised to buzz your intercom as you opened the door. “Harry-” you started, unable to find any other, better words.
“Come to dinner with me,” he said, gaze trailing up and down your body. You were wearing your ‘good’ jeans, the ones that sucked you in in all the right places yet showcased your curves in all the best ones. You had more makeup on than he’d seen you in before, though your freckles and beauty spots still peeked through. The oversized leather jacket slung over your shoulders obscured the top half of your body, but Harry didn’t need to see any more to know just how good you looked. “Please,” he added, holding up a single red rose.
“Dinner with you,” you repeated, a little stunned by his offer. “Dinner.. with me. Should we say it once more for good luck?” Harry laughed. “Maybe once more,” you smiled, pulling your phone from your back pocket. need to cancel, something came up x you sent quickly to your best friends. “Where are we going?” you asked Harry, eyes locking back onto him as he walked back down the path. “In first, questions later,” he told you, unlocking his car and opening the passenger side door for you.
“You’re acting very murdery for a man of the law,” you laughed, sliding onto the seat. “It was a test, and you failed. Should never get in a strange man’s car,” he joked.
The drive was mostly silent, except for the rhythm of Harry’s fingers tapping against the steering wheel. You were suddenly nervous, mouth dry and heart pounding as you watched the city become a blur. The sun was starting to set overhead as you drove further from home, street lamps and homes beginning to light up around you. Harry glanced over at you, brows furrowed as he tried to read the emotion etched onto your face. “You okay?” he asked, resting a strong hand on your knee.
“Shy,” you smiled weakly. It had only just hit you that you didn’t know Harry at all, couldn’t even think of anything to say to cut through the silence. You wanted the evening to go well, wanted to explore the connection you felt with him. But if you stammered and stuttered all night long, you’d have to go into hiding before a future with Harry even became a possibility.
You watched him as he drove, brows knitted in concentration as he navigated the busy streets. You hadn’t even paid attention to what he was wearing before, and as your eyes wandered over his body, your jaw went slack.
Harry wore a loose white dress shirt that although slightly oversized, seemed to fit him perfectly. He’d left the top few buttons open, allowing glimpses of his toned physique. As he moved his hands around the steering wheel, the material of the shirt shifted, revealing intricate tattoos that adorned his arms and chest. You’d seen a couple on his arms, but the amount that littered the tanned skin of his torso made your heart race. With each tiny movement, his tattoos peeked through the fabric, muscles flexing underneath the inked skin. He was handsome in a way that was new to you, rugged and yet soft.
There was something about his age that drew you to him, his years on you more a challenge than anything. He clearly knew how to act and had no problems going after what he wanted, a world away from the men you knew who were all still stuck in their fratboy mindsets.
“We’re here,” Harry said, resting a gentle hand over yours to pull you from your daydream. He’d pulled up in front of a quaint pub. The bold blue exterior was littered with bright flowers in hanging baskets and window boxes. A crowd of merry customers had spilled out onto the pavement outside, the warm glow from the pub washing over them. “This is so cute,” you told Harry, following him through the open door. “Officer Styles!” a man called out from across the bar. Harry greeted him with a firm handshake, turning his ear to the man’s mouth to hear him over the music. It wasn’t long before he turned back to you, grabbing a hold of your hand to lead you up the stairs. “I did some work for the owner,” he told you, pulling open another door. “Don’t live far from here so I come often now. Good food and good views,” he smirked, stepping out of the way to reveal the scene set up for you.
The balcony was slim, only just wide enough to fit two small tables. One was set up for dining, a bottle of red perched among ice in the middle. The other was covered in candles, wax dripping around a beautiful bouquet in the centre. It was secluded and romantic, the dream setting for your first date with what could be your dream man.
You talked and laughed for what felt like forever, voice hoarse from giggling at Harry’s jokes. The sharing plates he’d ordered sat cold and forgotten in front of you both, almost empty glasses stained pink from the wine.
A hint of a smirk played on Harry's lips as his eyes trailed over yours. “Quickfire round, since I have a feeling you won’t let me kiss you until we know each other better. Family?”
“My brother’s younger, he’s in uni. Parents live by the coast,” you told him, heat rising through your core at the very idea of kissing him.
“My mum lives up north, got an older sister too. Hobbies?”
“I like painting. Don’t do it as much anymore but..” you let your voice trail off.
“But you’re going to paint me?” Harry grinned, turning his back to you and peering seductively over his shoulder. “Draw me like one of your French girls,” he drawled, a mocking glint in his eyes.
“Nuh uh. Got to answer or you’ll never get that kiss.”
“I don’t have hobbies. I like working out and like puzzles,” Harry shrugged.
“Typical old man hobby,” you laughed. Harry chuckled and shook his head. "Well, maybe I am an old soul trapped in a sexy young body," he replied with a playful grin. "Can't complain about that, right?"
You nodded, still amused by his choice of hobbies. "You’re right, I can’t.”
As your conversation continued, you and Harry discovered more and more about each other. Your dreams, fears, and your favourite childhood memories. You laughed and shared stories, the connection between you growing stronger with each passing moment.
“M’not ready to let you go yet,” Harry smiled, looking out over the river. It was almost totally dark now, the last rays of evening sunshine nearly vanished behind the horizon. You smiled back at Harry. “"I'm not ready to go either," you admitted, rolling your bottom lip into your mouth as you looked over him, taking in the beauty of the scene. He was the definition of a silver fox. You’d noticed heads turning as you left the pub, young (and older) women captivated by just a glance of Harry. Being the girl on his arm felt good, even if it was just for the evening.
“Let’s walk,” Harry told you, his fingers intertwining with yours. You strolled down the riverside hand in hand, chatting mindlessly. Harry shared stories of his childhood, his years working for a local bakery before he moved to London and joined the Met.
You felt so much comfort and warmth as you listened to Harry. His stories painted vivid pictures in your mind, a glimpse into his past giving you some understanding of the person he was. As the two of you continued walking, the sound of the flowing river created a soothing backdrop to your conversation. The setting sun was casting a golden glow over your surroundings, and you couldn't help but feel a growing connection with Harry. It was as if time stood still, and the world around you faded away, leaving only the two of you in that moment.
You found yourself opening up to Harry, sharing your own stories. He listened attentively, his eyes filled with genuine interest and understanding. It was refreshing to be with someone who truly cared about getting to know you on a deeper level.
As the evening progressed, the conversation shifted towards more lighthearted topics. Laughter filled the air as Harry recounted some of the funnier people he’d encountered during his career. His animated gestures and contagious laughter made it impossible for you not to join in. There was a boyish charm behind his manly facade, and the more time you spent with Harry, the more you realized how effortlessly he made you feel at ease. There was a natural chemistry between you, a connection that went beyond words. It was a feeling of familiarity, as if you had known each other for years.
As darkness began to envelop you, Harry gently squeezed your hand, bringing your attention back to the present moment. You both paused, eyes trailing over the other’s features under the moonlight. Harry tugged on your arm quickly, pulling you towards the wall. Your heart quickened as his gaze fell to your parted lips, his body gently pressing your back into the brick. The light cast a soft glow on his face, lust etched into every line on his face.
You felt as if you were floating somewhere outside your body as Harry leaned in, his warm breath mingling with yours. His lips brushed against your own, gentle yet filled with an insatiable longing.
You responded eagerly, your hands instinctively finding their way to his waist. The kiss deepened, becoming a dance of lust and unspoken desires. Harry's lips moved against yours with a hunger that matched your own, his hands roaming your body. It had been a long time since a kiss had ignited a fire within your core, and yet you were burning brighter with every touch.
The taste of him was intoxicating, warm wine, sweetness and desire on his tongue leaving you breathless. He pressed you further into the wall, your bodies molding together perfectly as if they were made to be intertwined.
It had started to rain at some point, though you were too consumed by the raw passion that existed between you to notice the soft raindrops running down your skin. All you could focus on was Harry’s tongue licking into your mouth, a silent promise of the yearning and desire that he felt for you.
He pulled your bottom lip into his mouth before you both pulled away, breathless and panting. The world slowly came back into focus, but the sight of Harry before you nearly made your heart stop. The rain had soaked through his shirt, the thin material now translucent and dipping and weaving over his toned abdomen. His curls were slick against his forehead, raindrops lingering on the end of his eyelashes. His jaw was tense as he looked over your face, one hand gently grazing your waist. He was mesmerising, powerful and yet vulnerable as he stood soaked through in front of you.
You reached out with a gentle hand, pushing the wet curls from his face. But just as your swollen lips parted to speak, the heavens opened above you. It was as if someone had thrown a bucket of water over you and Harry, raindrops pelting you from every angle. You looked at each other in shock, a laugh tumbling past your lips.
Harry grabbed a hold of your hand and ran, the sound of your footsteps slapping against puddles breaking the silence of the now empty streets. You were barely able to hold yourself upright from laughter, falling into Harry’s body as your legs carried you closer to the car. His grip tightened on your wrist, guiding you through the dark paths.
As you reached the car, Harry fumbled with the keys, his hands shaking from the sudden cold. You stood beside him, shivers of adrenaline running through you. The rain smacked against the roof of the car as Harry unlocked it, pulling open the door for you. Even in the pouring rain, he was still a gentleman. You slid in quickly, the sudden warmth fogging up the windows.
You sat in silence for a moment, eyes trailing over each other as you caught your breath. A smile played on Harry’s lips as he looked at you, his hand coming up to brush your sodden hair from your face.
There was no way you could sleep. You’d been tossing and turning for at least an hour, the ache in your core too much to sleep on. All you could do was replay the evening in your mind, wondering exactly how you ended up alone in Harry’s bed.
“Here,” Harry handed you one of his T-shirts and some pyjama bottoms. “Shower’s through there, get yourself warmed up.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead as you headed into the bathroom, a tiny sigh of disappointment slipping past your lips. You were desperate for him to join you in the shower, craving more of his touch. A night of stolen glances and gentle touches had you burning up even before the kiss, but after seeing what Harry’s mouth was capable of, you were dying for more of him.
As the water washed over you, all you could think about was Harry’s lips on yours. The hunger in his eyes before he kissed you, the taste of red wine on his tongue.
“Would you not get in trouble for this?” you asked Harry, hands wrapped tightly around the hot chocolate he’d handed you. “Maybe. But once we have your stuff back, the case is over. They can’t say anything then,” he shrugged, turning to lean against the kitchen counter. He got more handsome every time you looked at him, as if that were even possible. Now, standing there with his old man plaid pyjama pants and a T-shirt tight against his muscular frame, you were left pressing your thighs together to keep the heat in. The anticipation was almost too much to bear, adrenaline coursing through your veins.
“Can’t sleep either, huh?” Harry smiled from the sofa. You almost jumped out of your skin at his voice, having tried your hardest to creep silently into the kitchen. He looked adorable, tucked under a thick blanket with his long legs squashed up at the end of the sofa. “Just needed water,” you told him, grabbing an empty cup from the counter.
“Why don’t you want to share a bed with me?” you suddenly burst out, turning on your heel to face him. You weren’t going to beg, didn’t want to whine, but the words came out before you could stop yourself. Harry chuckled, padding over to join you by the sink. He pushed a strand of hair out of your face, cupping your cheek with his free hand. Pressing a gentle kiss to your lips, he whispered, “come on,” his voice low and husky.
You followed Harry out of the kitchen and back up the stairs, watching as he sat down on the edge of the bed. He patted his legs, signalling for you to join him. You straddled his thick thighs, eyes fixed on his as he looked over your body. In only his t-shirt and your tiny panties, you’d never looked more delicious to him. “I didn’t share a bed with you because I try not to sleep with women on the first date,” he told you, slipping a hand under your t-shirt before holding your waist with a firm grip. “And I wouldn’t be able to resist if I were in bed with you.” His eyes came to rest on yours, his pupils blown under thick eyelashes. “You don’t have to resist, Harry,” you replied, your voice small, barely slipping out past your heart pounding in your throat. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, one hand toying with the curls at the nape of his neck. His hand moved further up your body, thumb running over your nipple.
“Y’so beautiful,” Harry cooed, pulling your t-shirt off in one quick movement. He sat back for a second, an arrogant smirk pulling at the corners of his lips as he gazed over you. Hunger was written all over his face, the intensity of his gaze sending a shiver down your spine.
He leaned in, his lips soft as they brushed against yours. Gentle, yet fuelled by desire. His tongue moved around yours, a delicate dance that left you breathless against his mouth.
Harry’s hands roamed your exposed skin, tracing patterns of heat and need. His touch was electric, insatiable as he gripped and groped at every bit of skin he could reach. He moved with purpose, tracing the curves and contours of your upper body. Every touch, every stroke, sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body.
His lips left yours, trailing a path of fire down your throat, a trail of goosebumps left in their wake. His breath was hot against your skin, his lips smooth as he suckled and nibbled at the sensitive flesh.
You shifted slightly on his lap, his hard cock nudging at your folds through his pyjama pants. The room was filled with a symphony of whispered moans and ragged breaths as you rubbed yourself on him, the soft scratch of Harry’s pyjamas between your thighs only adding to your desire. You needed him in a way that transcended reality, a hunger that went beyond the physical. Your yearning was deep in your soul as Harry’s hands continued to explore you, his touch more than just a physical sensation. It was a language of its own, speaking unbridled passion.
He wrapped an arm under your hips, lifting you up just enough to slip his pyjamas down his thighs. His cock sprang up between the two of you, grazing your entrance. You whimpered as his tip touched you, your head falling onto Harry’s shoulder. He stroked a hand down his shaft, hissing as his thumb brushed over the angry tip. He started to move you, not expecting you to want to ride him, but you wrapped a firm hand around his neck and shook your head softly, pulling your face from his shoulder to meet his eyes. “Like this, Harry,” you whispered, shifting in his grip until his head lined up with your folds. You pulled your panties to the side, your juices warm against his head.
“You’re on birth control?” he asked, voice strangled as he resisted the urge to push into you. You nodded, sinking down slowly until his thick cock was deep inside of you, splitting your walls wide open. A deep cry fell from your lips as you stilled, his shaft throbbing as it settled into you.
“So fuckin’ tight, kitten,” he drawled, lips planting hungry kisses along your jawline. His eyes were fixed on the mirror behind you, watching his hand grip onto the curve of your ass. His free hand slid under you, easing you up ever so slightly. You could feel him everywhere, in your stomach and in your throat as he pushed deeper into you. Your walls were threatening to burst around his shaft, the size of his cock scratching an itch you never knew you’d had. It was pure ecstasy.
“Harry,” you whined, gripping him tighter as you pushed your hips upwards, starting to find your rhythm. The burn was white-hot in your core, tingles of pleasure spreading through your body as you bounced up and down on his lap. Your nails raked down his back as he fucked into you, deep whines and moans being pulled from your mouth every time Harry’s cock hit your sweet spot. His strong arm was guiding your hips up and down, his free hand still exploring your body as he pressed kisses along your throat. You still wanted more of each other, still searching each other’s bodies as if you had been starved of touch for years.
You were as close as you could be to him, your bodies melding together with every push of his hips. Your clit was rubbing against the fabric of your panties with every movement, every slap of your cheeks against his groin sending you further into your spiral.
“You’re mine, all mine, huh?” Harry mewled against your skin, his lips moving down to find your nipple. He sucked and licked around the bud, his lips swollen and hot. “All yours,” you whined, your orgasm creeping up on you after Harry’s dominant ownership. He held you tightly, your trembling legs heavy on his arm despite how light you felt. You were sure you could take flight in that moment, pleasure coursing through you with every buck of his hips. You threw your head onto his shoulder as you came, a strangled cry pushing past your dry lips.
Your walls tightened around his cock, his lips pressing a tiny moan into your skin. He flipped you over once your breathing slowed, the new angle pushing his cock deeper into you. Harry splayed a hand across your stomach, feeling where he was fucking into you. His eyes were dark as he looked down at you, watching the way your tits bounced with every rock of his hips. His thrusts started to get sloppier, his hips knocking into you harder as he came close to his high. You could feel him throbbing inside of you as he panted, jaw slack as he pulled out of you quickly. One hand stroked the length of his cock as he came, his come splashing violently all over your chest. You released the hand gripping his shoulder to swipe a finger through the puddle, licking it from your fingertip hungrily. “So fuckin’ perfect,” he drawled, chest heaving as he watched you.
You were more content in that moment than you’d ever been, silently thanking whoever had decided to steal your bag. If it was all an insane plan to get you here, covered in Harry’s come, you’d thank them every day for the rest of your life.
taglist: @sleutherclaw @slutforcoffein @harrysolaf @opheliaofficial07 @dragonslayersupremacy @nikkisimps @michellekstyles @im-an-overthinker @fangirl7060 @indierockgirrl @palmettogal508 @thereunion1d @hannah9921 @harryshotpocket @daphnesutton @tenaciousperfectionunknown @thegrapejuiceblues1982 @mema10 @annageeeezzzz @cicicavill7 @drewsephrry @tswiftsgf @ashleighsss @bikestyles @he6rtshaker @prettygurl-2009 @softestqueeen @jerseygirlinca @teammom4 @chesthairrry @golden-hoax @lilfreakjez @swag13r @cursingatdaylight @s-h-e-l-b-e-e
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goldenbuckyyy · 2 years
Text
YOU ARE IN LOVE
Summary: Confessions of love lead to a place you never thought you’d be.
Pairings: Draco Malfoy x fem!Reader
Word count: 6.6kish
Warnings: Idiots to lovers, SMUT (over 3k of it), oral sex (fem!receiving), raw sex, cream pie, multiple orgasms, undertones of Dom!Draco, pretty much making love
A/N: hi!!!! Omg, it’s finally here! Yay!! Here’s PART 4 of my Heather series. 🥺 my baby!! I’m so happy for this part. Hopefully you all enjoy. Please let me know what you think at the end!! I love them so much 😭💚 please read the first three parts before this one (linked below) Song for this fic: “You are in love” by Taylor Swift
Also hit 400 followers recently 🥺🫶🏻 thank you!!
All mistakes are my own. Please do not repost or translate my fics on any other side nor this one.
I appreciate any likes, reblogs, messages, and interactions.
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The cold November chill felt welcomed on your skin as you stood in the Astronomy tower. You overlooked Hogwarts with a smile, knowing this is the last Thanksgiving you’d ever spend here, but you didn’t feel sad right now. 
You felt grateful for your experience here because not many were that lucky. You had stayed for Thanksgiving break once back in your second year and it was magical. So beautiful. You loved it. Draco had stayed with you then. He never left you alone. 
But you were alone now. You knew he was back at the Malfoy manor. You watched him leave to catch the train just days ago. You pretended to forget something at the castle as your friends went to the train, but it was just an excuse so nobody would know that you were staying for the holiday. 
You didn’t want Draco finding out. You wanted to be alone. 
You slowly let your fingers run along the railing, the cold metal against your warm skin making you shiver slightly, and you tug your orange sweater over your palms to warm you up again. 
Today was Thanksgiving. One of your favorite holidays. You mostly enjoyed it because of the food. But truthfully, who didn’t? 
You were going to miss your mom's homemade Thanksgiving dinner. Especially the apple pie you and your dad always made for the holiday. But Hogwarts is going to have to make do. You’re sure they won’t disappoint. They never do. 
You had noticed there were a bit more students that had decided to stay. You were surprised to see so many students in your class. They probably wanted to enjoy their last Thanksgiving here as a student at Hogwarts. You were surprisingly happy to have chosen to stay. 
You start making your way down to the Great Hall for Thanksgiving dinner. Your belly is begging for food already. You only drank a warm cup of hot chocolate this morning because you loved to wait to eat until dinner time. That way you had more room for the feast. 
You had chosen to dress up today either way. You had paired your orange oversized sweater with a black skirt, it was one of those fitted ones that you really liked, black sheer leggings, and your pair of black booties. It was simple, but you felt pretty. 
You had even applied some makeup and styled your hair to your own liking. You even managed to find your cute pair of thanksgiving earrings. They were two little pumpkin pies. You thought it was hilarious when your mom gifted them to you when you were a kid. You’ve worn them every year since. 
You enter the Great Hall with a smile on your face, the different foods filling your space, you inhale deeply, almost moaning at the thought of eating already, and look around to see where you can sit. 
You spot the Golden Trio sitting down at the Gryffindor table. Talking amongst themselves enthusiastically and laughing. You noticed all the different students from different houses had all gathered at the same table. You smiled at that and made your way to Harry.
Ron notices you first, his elbow shoving Harry suddenly, Harry whimpering an “Ow!” He's about to shove Ron when Ron raises his eyebrows towards you, you’re still smiling as you walk towards them. Harry does the same thing he always does when he sees you. 
He sits up straighter, fixes his glasses, and smiles at you. 
“Hi, Harry!” You say as you reach them, standing next to Hermoine. Who has an empty seat next to her. She looks up at you, smiling, they all welcome you, “Is this seat taken?” 
“No, of course not!” Harry blubbers out with a rush. 
Ron and Hermoine snicker at his reaction, Hermoine places her hand on your forearm, “Sit, Y/N. You’re more than welcomed to join us.” 
You beam at her as you sit next to her. You both fall into conversation, completely forgetting about Ron and Harry, and gush about different topics. It was so incredibly easy to talk to Hermoine. Even Ron and Harry. 
They had even admitted to you a couple days ago that they were scared of you because of your friendship with Draco. You laughed loudly when they told you and teased them about it. You had even told them that Draco only puts on a front at them, but was truthfully a nice person. They were hesitant to believe you, but you didn’t force your words at them. 
Ron watches you and Hermoine with wide eyes, he looks at Harry, who looks about the same, “It’s like we don’t even exist, mate.” Harry hums in agreement. 
Soon enough, the long table is filled with the Thanksgiving feast. 
You gawk at the food in front of you. All the classics. The delicious looking turkey, the honey glazed pineapple ham, sweet potato casserole with brown butter on top, extra cheesy Mac and cheese, mash potatoes, corn casserole, and everything pumpkin flavored. 
Pumpkin pie, pumpkin juice, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin topping. It was overwhelming. 
You noticed your favorite butterbeer cookies eyeing you already. You reached over to grab some before they finished. 
You all start digging into the food, you enjoy a little bit of everything until you feel satisfied. 
The talks and laughter around you never stops. You feel happy with a belly full of food and a mouth filled with laughter. 
The Great Hall starts emptying slowly and you feel someone sit down next to you, you turn with a smile, and it doesn’t falter when you see Cedric. Dressed in his favorite Hufflepuff sweater and scarf combo along with a dazzling smile. 
You turn to face him, tilting your head on your arm, “Hi!” 
“Hi,” he chuckles out with crinkling eyes. 
You were happy that thankfully Cedric was okay with being only friends with you. It was a slightly awkward conversation the next night after what had happened she tween you two. Or what had almost happened. 
He had caught you on your way back to the Slytherin quarters, you had both gone to sit at one of the benches in the hall, and spoke openly about the past events. 
You apologized profusely about what had happened and he stopped you midway so he could apologize. He repeatedly asked you if you had felt he had taken advantage of you. With careful reassurance that you had consented to what had happened, every step of the way, and explained to him how you didn’t think it was fair to either of you to pursue something when your heart was truthfully with someone else. 
He didn’t ask who, but you knew that he knew. 
“How are you doing?” You ask him, nibbling on a butterbeer cookie. 
“I’m doing alright, are those good?” He questions curiously, you had him a piece, and he chews on it and rolls his eyes back, “Bloody brilliant, yeah?” 
“Indeed,” you hum back with a chuckle. 
Easy conversation flows between you two about the end of the semester and how lovely it is to be here for the Holidays. You both agreed that it was the right choice to stay here and that maybe you’d both stay again for Christmas. You had never stayed for Christmas and the Trio said they were going to stay as well. 
“I’m staying then,” you state happily, sipping on your pumpkin juice, and laughing at Ron’s comments to Hermione about something ridiculous. 
Hermoine nudges you suddenly, you look at her confused, her face falling as she’s looking towards the Great Hall double doors, and you turn quickly to see what’s she’s looking at. 
You feel your heart drop to your stomach when you see Draco standing there. He’s wearing his sweater, your favorite one, black slacks, and you notice his hair is loose and framing his forehead in curls. 
His eyes are already on you. 
You furr your eyebrows in confusion as you wonder what he’s doing here. You look around at your friends, who are looking at you in confusion, only knowing the bare minimum of what you had told them. But they knew something was going on between you two. 
“Excuse me,” you say quickly, grabbing your extra butterbeer cookies, and walk towards Draco. 
He waits for you at the entrance and immediately follows you as you walk out. 
You stop in the empty hallway, “What are you doing here?” You question him as you try to keep your voice steady. 
You fumble with the cookies in your hand, not wanting to look up at him, and he sighs deeply above you. 
“My mother told me you were spending the holiday here. Why didn’t you tell me? You could’ve come home with me.” 
You huff, “No, I couldnt.” 
“Why not? Because we’re in a fight?” Draco’s tone is not harsh, but in disbelief. You avoid his gaze and look to the side. 
“It doesn’t matter if we’re in a fight. You’re my best friend and I don’t want you to be alone on one of your favorite holidays.” 
“I’m not alone…I’m with my friends,” you reply quickly, brushing your hair away from your face, and trying to keep your heart from racing. 
“And what am I?” 
You finally look up at him when he says that. His gray eyes peering at you, his lips turned down into a frown, and he waits for your reply. You notice his fingertips are itching to grab your wrists. His hands go into tight fists to keep them to himself. 
Your heart skips a beat because you miss him so much. It’s only been over a week that you’ve spoken to him. Been in his bed. 
But it feels like a lifetime and it’s slowly killing you. 
You tilt your head to the side as you watch him, the corners of your lips frowning, your eyes taking him in, “You’re… you’re my Draco.” 
You both start casually walking down the hall, you both on instinct go towards the peach three in the courtyard, and you both sit down on the bench under the tree.
You shiver slightly as the cold wind brushes against your warm cheeks and Draco silently curses at himself for not bringing a coat with him to the Great Hall. 
You turn to face him, still holding your cookies in your hands, and look at him. Your heart feels heavy as you both stare at each other. 
His eyes look into yours with such sadness in them that it makes you want to curl into a ball and weep. You feel yourself starting to shake slightly because of how nervous you feel. 
Is this the end? The real end between you two? 
“Hey,” his voice startles you, soft and sweet, his hands finally inch towards you, and he takes your free one into his warm palms. His big hand covering yours completely. 
“Why are you shaking? It’s just me,” he whispers as he pushes a stray hair away from your face, his thumb caressing your cheek slightly, you feel yourself flush underneath his gaze, and you shuffle on the bench. 
“I feel this way because of you,” you admit, not breaking eye contact with him. 
“I…” Draco starts to say, but quickly stops talking when he notices a couple people walking around the halls and chatting in the corridor as well. 
He doesn’t let go of your hand, “We should go somewhere more private.” 
“Like where?”
He opens his mouth, but closes it. His jaw locks, his eyes slowly avert from yours, but then he looks back. Your eyebrows raise in confusion as you wait for him to speak.
“What about my room?” His voice filled with uncertainty. 
You still. You haven’t set foot in his room since the argument you last had in there. You hadn’t even bothered to go and get your things that you had left there. You hadn’t wanted to face him yet. 
A part of you wants to go back in there. You miss the warmth and comfort you felt there. 
Lately, all you’ve felt is loneliness as you sleep alone every night in the empty bed in your big room. 
The emptiness of his side next to you never left your mind. You find yourself nodding, he gets up, you follow, and he leads you towards his room. 
He stops in front of the door after walking up the steps, you behind him, and he whispers his password to the painting in front of the door. 
He whispers your favorite spell.
Your heart tugs a bit that he didn’t change it. You know it hasn’t been that long, but it’s been the longest time the both of you have gone without each other. 
He opens the door and the sweet smell of apples mixed with cinnamon and vanilla fills your senses. You let your eyes close slightly, inhaling the mesmerizing scent, and you follow him inside his room. 
He walks around the room and you stand near the door, feeling a bit awkward, not knowing what to do anymore in this room, and you watch him. 
He peers at you as he sits in his emerald green loveseat, he gestures to the matching chair in the corner of the room, and you start walking towards it. You glance around the room, taking notice that all your belongings are still in the same place, and you wish they weren’t. 
You secretly wish he had already packed up your belongings into a box to make this easier. You sit down and set your cookies onto the table in between you two. 
“Do you want some tea or coffee?” He asks as he’s about to stand up to make some. 
“No, it’s okay.” 
He pauses and sits back down. He turns his body towards you, his leg bouncing up and down, and he lets out a deep sigh. 
A couple minutes pass with you both sitting in silence. You gulp down your nerves and open your mouth to speak. 
“Draco?” You ask. 
Your voice fills his ears like sweet honey. “Yes?” 
“Why am I here?” You question him as you let out a sigh. 
“I’m a coward,” he blurts out, turning his face to look at you, you frown. 
“What?” 
“I am a coward. Draco Malfoy is a coward.” 
You adjust yourself into your seat, placing one leg underneath your bottom, and fully face him.
“Draco,” you say, reaching over to him and taking his hand in both of yours. “What are you talking about?” 
His hand grips yours, “The last time you were here… You, uh, you asked me if I ever thought about doing.. what we do… with, umm, someone else.” Your eyes furr because Draco is fumbling with his words and he never does. 
“I remember,” you tell him, a pang in your chest when you remember what he said after you asked him that last time. 
“Well.. I.. I, uh, I lied to you.” 
You sit up straight. His eyes racing over your face, taking in your different expressions, “I know I insinuated that I thought about doing that with Heather, but I lied. I’ve never thought about doing what we do with anybody else. Ever.” 
You scoff at him, not believing him, “What are you going off about, Draco? You’ve fancied Heather since the day you met her.” You try to pull your hand out of his, but he grips onto it.
“I told you that day that I never thought about doing this with someone else and I meant it. I know I said I fancied Heather, but I swear.. I… I never have.”
“You lied to me?” You say in disbelief. A part of you wanting to be happy that he never fancied her, but why did he lie to you?
“I… I did.” 
“Why? What are you saying?” You pull your hand out of his with force, standing up quickly and starting to pace around the room, as the memories of that conversation fill your mind. 
Draco sits up in the loveseat, facing you, and pouting. 
“I asked you if you felt anything for me! I asked you if I was more than just your friend! You didn’t say anything! I gave you a chance to say anything, to say something, and you bloody stayed quiet! You never said anything! And then I’m with Cedric that night and you burst into his room, demanding I go with you, and for what? For you to never say anything else to me? Then we didn't talk for almost a week and now… now… now you want to say something? Why?” 
You continue to pace the room, confusion filling you, and you stop in front of him. Hands on your hips, chest raising angrily, and you watch him. 
He doesn’t say anything, biting the skin around his fingernails, and he bites his lower lip with nerves. 
“What’s going on, Draco? You’re confusing me,” you cry out at him.
“I am a coward that didn’t see what was in front of him until it was too late,” he stands up, towering over you, taking his hands in his, and you both look into each other’s eyes. 
“I am in love with you,” he confesses in a whisper. You suck in a gasp, your world stills at his words, and you start shaking your head. 
You frown deeply, “Stop it.” 
Draco grips your hands in his tightly, “This… this thing between us started in fifth year.. we were barely fifteen years old. We both decided to do this, but a part of me only agreed because I wanted you to want me the same way I’ve always wanted you,” you mouth parts in shock, “A part of me has always loved you. I… I think I’ve always known that I have, but I’ve always been a coward at admitting it to myself. That was almost four years ago next year… And… my-my love for you has only grown.” 
You feel tears welling up in your eyes as you stare up at him, trying your hardest to wrap your mind around his words, and you let the tears fall down your cheeks. 
“Please, don’t cry,” he whispers as his thumb wipes away your tears gently. 
Your lips quiver, “I… I’m having a hard time believing you, Draco.” Your confession stuns him, he looks at you with confusion. 
“Wh-what?” His voice is shaky. 
“What about Heather?” 
His eyes darted away from your face for a second, “I… I, um, I made it up.”
“You what?” You feel different emotions filling your body. Confusion at his confession. Anger that he lied to you. Happiness because he feels the same way. Guilt for what you had done with Cedric. 
“I didn’t lie when I said I met Heather because of my mom in the summer. But I’ve never felt anything towards her. Ever. I only said that to you because I was hoping to make you jealous,” another confession slips his lips. 
“To… make me jealous?” You repeat his words, feeling distress. 
He nods, his body language showing you he’s ashamed of his actions, and he sighs. “I… I know my actions are confusing you.. and I know you might need some time, but…” he pauses and his palms cup your face gently, “I am in love with you.” 
Your breathing is picking up, you’re looking at him in shock, everything you’ve ever wanted to hear… he’s saying it right now. 
“I’m so in love with you that I was deeply afraid of letting you know because of the fear that you didn’t feel the same way about me. But if I would have just looked deeper… I would have seen and heard what you were trying to tell me…” 
“And what was that?” You whisper out, your hands slowly moving to palm his hands on your face. 
“That you’re in love with me too,” he pleads, voice wavering with hope. 
“Draco,” you whisper, tears falling down your cheeks, closing your eyes as you let a whimper fall out between your lips. 
“Do you not believe me?” He questions, hurt filling the room. 
You sniff as you lean your face into his palms, crying out, “Can you blame me?” 
Before you know it, you feel Draco’s hands leaving your face, you look for his hands, and he’s kneeling in front of you. 
“What? Draco, what are you doing?” 
He holds your hands in his, his knees touching the floor, he lets out a quiet cry. 
Your heart breaks at hearing him cry. 
“Y/N…” he begins, “Its always been you.” He looks up at you with tears in his eyes, “I have always loved you, never anybody else. I swear it. I have never once felt the way I feel for you for anybody else. Never.” 
He grips your hands in his, kissing the palms of your wrists, “You are the only one I’m ever going to want.” His voice is shaking, “It’s you who I want next to me. Warming my bed, forever. You’re everything I want. Everything!” 
You both are staring at each other, crying together, he continues, “I know I’m a bloody fucking idiot for not saying this sooner and I know it’s hard to believe me right now after everything… but I’m so in love with you that merely thinking about anybody else… It sickens me. You are the only person that matters to me. You’re the only one I see in my future.” 
You fall to your knees in front of him, your arms wrapping around his neck, his hands gripping your waist so your knees don’t hit the floor as he tugs you into him, and you cry. 
“Draco, I…” your lips quiver, “I’m so sorry for what I did with Cedric. I… I thought you didn’t feel the same way and I just wanted to forget about you.” 
Draco shakes his head rapidly, “Don’t apologize. You did nothing wrong. I was a coward and you were just trying to move on from my bloody dumbass.” 
You let out a giggle at his words, you wipe his tears away from his face as he wipes away yours, “I’m in love with you, too.” You confess, your heart rate accelerating at saying those words out loud. Finally. 
His eyes lighten up at your words. 
“I’ve always loved you. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember. It has been hell without you since our last argument and I never want to go through that again.” You lay your head on his shoulder, sniffing and whimpering into him, and he holds you in his arms tightly. 
“It won’t ever happen again, I swear.” 
“I love you,” he whispers into your ear as his hands tangle into your hair. You scruff your head onto his shoulders, taking him in, and breathing in his warm scent all around you. 
You both lean out, his forehead on yours, your eyes are closed, you can feel his heartbeat against you, and his breathing increasing slightly. 
One of his hands grasp your neck, you lean up to look at him, his eyes wander your face and land on your lips. Your hands are holding onto his biceps as one of his free arms wraps around your waist, gently and with hesitance. As if he’s scared to touch you. 
“I’ve missed you terribly, my love.” 
You lick your lips, “I missed you more.” You let your gaze stop on his lips, he parts them open, and you both start leaning into each other. 
You met in the middle, your lips centimeters apart, you can smell his mint breathe, and you shiver at being this close to him again. 
“Draco,” you whisper out as you close your eyes, letting your body melt into his, and he pulls you into his space with his arms. 
His lips touch yours gently, you whimper at the feeling as fire erupts in your belly at the contact, goosebumps breaking out over your skin, and your eyes flutter closed. 
You move your arms to wrap around his neck as your lips move against his, it’s as if you’ve never been apart, and you feel fuzzy like you always do when you kiss him. You feel your body already reacting to his touch and you cry out for him. 
Draco’s tongue slowly lines your bottom lip, you part your mouth open for him, and your tongues meet in the middle. You both moan simultaneously, one of his hands gripping your waist, the other on the back of your neck, and you grip your arms together around him. You lean up to kiss him harder and he bites your bottom lip which causes you to whine loudly. 
You pull away from him, his mouth sucking on your lip, and you groan against him. His hands move towards the end of your sweater, you feel him hesitate, and you look at him with a small smile. Feeling your skin flushed. 
“I trust you,” you breathe out, his eyes flutter, and he smiles sweetly at you. He wraps his lips around yours once more, his hands inch underneath your sweater, and your skin feels as if it’s on fire. His big warm hands on your skin making your belly erupt with butterflies. 
“God, I’ve missed your skin.” He starts to kiss down your neck with big open mouthed kisses, leaving love bites down as he goes, his eyes looking up at you with pleasure, and you moan with every kiss. You grind your hips against his, your hands clinging onto his shoulders, and you pull away from him. 
You stand up quickly, pulling him up with you, and you both stand in front of each other. 
You take one step back, letting yourself take him in, the big dent in his slacks making your mouth water, and you reach down to tug off your sweater. 
You throw it to the side, letting him look at your chest, your breasts are covered with a lacy black bra, and you're both breathing heavily. You kick off your boots with ease, he follows your lead by tugging off his sweater, and unbuckling his belt. 
You both hold eye contact as you lower down your skirt and him his slacks. You lick your lips once you see him in only his tight black briefs, your mouth feeling dry when he palms himself to try and relieve the pressure he’s feeling, he hisses at his own touch, you tighten your legs together for a second to slow down the throbbing you feel, and you slide your hands into your sheer leggings. 
You bend down slowly to pull them off your legs and you stand in front of him, holding the lace of your panties in between your fingers. 
Draco's eyes are taking you in, every single inch of you, and you don’t feel insecure under his stare. You missed the way he ate you up with his eyes, he’s biting his lips as his eyes go down to your breasts, your navel, and land on your most private area. 
You feel yourself wet with anticipation and want. 
“Lay down,” Draco orders, chills run down your spine at his tone, and your body follows before your mind can. You lay down on the bed, with your arms underneath you to hold you up, and Draco moves to hover over your body. 
You feel him against your thigh, hard, and you moan when he kisses your neck. 
His arms are caging you underneath him, “Can I touch you, baby?” 
You nod at him as you reach up to kiss his lips, slowly. 
His hand slips underneath your torso, he unclips your bra, you let it fall over your shoulders, pulling it off your chest, and his mouth immediately meets with your already perked nipples. 
You gasp when his warm tongue laps on your nipples, he moves between both of your breasts, his hands cupping each one of them, the moans you let out only fuels him, and he starts moving down your stomach. 
He lets his tongue swirl around your belly, licking your naval, and his hands grip onto your panties. 
He swiftly pulls them down, he sits on his knees with your legs on his shoulders, he pulls off your panties, he kisses the inside of your ankle, and you open your legs for him. 
Your hands grip your breasts as he admires you. You’re soaking and he knows it. 
He watches your glistening pussy underneath him, all for him, he moans at the sight, and curses. 
“You’re fucking beautiful,” he licks up your calf, bitting the inside of your thighs, and you whimper. His eyes are locked on yours, he’s making sure you’re watching him, and you bite your bottom lip when his mouth hovers over your pussy. 
“Dray,” you whisper, hitching your hips to him, and he tsks at you. 
“Always so inpatient,” he says with a chuckle, he lowers himself down flat, and spreads your legs wider. His mouth latches onto you, you moan out loudly when you feel his wet tongue on you, his tongue laying flat on your folds, then flicking up to your clit. 
You gasp sharply, your breathing increasing with pleasure, and you tilt your head back as your hands grasp onto his almost white locks. 
Your hips move with his mouth in sync, he licks and slurps your wetness, your clit throbbing against him, “I’ve missed your taste, princess.” His breaths on you, you move your legs onto his shoulders, and pull him down to you again. 
He continues to eat you up, he slowly lets a finger enter you, you cry out at the sensation, feeling yourself tight around his digit, and he works you open slowly. 
He groans against your pussy as he feels how tight you are around him, he couldn’t believe he had gone so long without you, and he inserts a second finger without warning. 
You gasp again, feeling yourself burning up as he opens you, his fingers curling inside of you is something you hadn’t realized how much you had missed, and Draco starts moving his hips into the mattress. 
Your mouth parts with pants as his fingers find your sweet spot, “Draco!” You breathe out with a moan, his tongue lapping your wetness faster, his lips wrap around your clit, sucking on it, your legs are starting to shake as you near your orgasm, and he increases his speed inside of you. 
His fingers keep fucking into you, his tongue licking you in the right places, and playing with your clit at all the right moments. 
“You’ve always tasted amazing, sweetheart.” Draco quickly says to you before he continues doing what he does best. 
You whine out, hands locked into his hair, your back arching up with pleasure, and he moves his free hand to play with your nipples. You tug onto his locks feeling yourself getting closer and knowing that’s the signal you use to tell him.
Draco moans against your pussy, sending vibrations to your clit, and you feel your lower belly start contracting with your anticipating orgasm. 
You feel tears in the corner of your eyes, your hips grinding against his mouth, and he curls his fingers inside of you one more time. 
“Draco!” You yell out in pleasure as your orgasm takes over you suddenly. His mouth latches onto your clit, sucking on it, your entire body shaking with euphoria, and Draco only slurps up all your wetness. 
Draco moans against your pussy, licking you slowly as you come down, your chest raising up and down to catch your breath, and Draco slowly pulls away from you. His fingers inside of you exit slowly and you bite your lip looking at him. 
Draco’s lips are swollen and puffy, he licks them and sucks his bottom lip, you reach down to him, pulling at him from his arms, and wrapping your lips around his. Moaning as you taste yourself on him. His hand wrapping underneath your neck, pulling your naked body into his, his warm-flushed skin feeling hot against you, and you both lean your foreheads together. 
You look down at his still covered dick and look into his eyes again. He waits for you to say something, his gray eyes looking beautiful, and you reach down to shove off his briefs. 
Draco moves one of his hands to help you, you feel his big dick hit your thighs, and you know he’s absolutely throbbing against you. 
“I can’t wait to feel you,” Draco whispers into your neck as he pumps himself quickly, you spread open your legs, placing your hands on his face, he aligns himself with you, you both stare into each other’s eyes, he rubs his dick up and down your wetness, hitting your clit gently, you moan, and then you feel him at your entrance. 
You’re both breathing deeply, his dick entering your folds, and you bite your lower lip. One of his hands underneath your waist and the other holding your face. It’s as if the world stills around you both. It feels as if it’s just you two at this moment. Just you two in this world and nobody else. 
Draco's eyes never leave yours as he slowly moves himself to enter you, you gasp at the feeling, he moans at your tightness around him, and his tip moves deeper inside of you. Slowly. 
You pull him closer into you, your pussy stretching around him, feeling so full once again, and you cry out to the missed feeling. 
His lips connect on yours passionately, “Always so fucking tight for me.” 
You nod at his words, kissing his lips, clenching around him, his mouth parting open on yours, you both letting out moans against each other’s lips at the pleasure, and he starts moving his hips against yours. 
“I’ve missed you,” you whisper against his lips, licking the inside of his mouth, rocking your hips against his, your noses nudging together, and he lets out a whimper as he bottoms out inside of you. 
“I’ve missed you so.. so, fuck, so fucking much.” His lips kiss your face, down your chin, and your neck. Leaving sloppy kisses all over you. 
He sucks on your collarbone, leaving more love bites because he knows you love to see them, and you roll your hips against his. 
His tongue swirls around your breasts again, your bodies moving together in sync, sweat already coating your skin, and his thrusting gets deeper inside of you. You feel so full right now. Feeling so full of Draco. 
Tears prick your eyes as you realize you are making love to Draco Malfoy. He’s making love to you. Maybe this isn’t the first time you make love, but it’s the first time you do after confessing your love to each other. 
Draco notices your tears, he kisses them away without pausing his motions, and whispers sweet nothings into your ear. 
“You’re perfect, baby. So fucking good for me. Like always.” 
He praises you, licking your earlobe and sucking on it, you grip the back of his neck as his words consume you, and you let the tears fall down your cheeks slowly. 
You moan out when he wraps one of his arms underneath your waist to hitch you up higher, his angle making his dick go in deeper, and all you feel is bliss. Blissfulness and love all around you. The room smells like vanilla, caramel, and sweet sex. 
His lips wrap around yours once again, your pussy squeezing around him, wanting to make him feel you, and he moans into your mouth. 
Draco swiftly switches your positions as he’s now sitting down on the bed, his legs parted open, you sitting down on him, hovering over his dick, and you align yourself again with him. 
Draco holds your hips with his big hands, looking down at himself as you reach down for him, you hold him steady while you lower yourself down into him. He’s watching himself enter your sweet pussy.
“Fuck,” he whispers at you, admiring the view. 
His hands grip your hips while you take him in, squeezing your walls around him, “Fucking shit.” He curses as he watches you take him in deep. 
You moan out, eyes rolling back at the sensation, setting your hands down on his shoulders to get a good rhythm, his hips moving into yours, and once you both get a good rhythm.. he pulls you into his lips once more. 
You kiss him, mouth open, both moaning together, your hips grinding down on his, feeling him everywhere, he’s filling you up so nicely, your breasts against his chest, his arm wraps around your waist holding you, and his forehead is against yours. 
In this position, you could feel him so deeply. Your walls contracting on his dick with every thrust, his moans as your clench only makes you wetter, and you both cry out at the feeling. 
His free hand moves in between the space of your bodies, his fingers inch towards your clit, and you whimper when you feel him touch your sensitive bud. 
“Draco,” you cry in a whisper, he slowly moves his fingers against you, kissing your neck, and you tilt your head back to let him. 
“Look at me,” he says, your body immediately reacts to his words, and you’re facing him. You look fucked and he loves it. He finds the most pleasure in making you feel this way. He loves it. 
You make eye contact with him, he licks his lips, and you don’t look away. You’re both panting together, bodies moving as if they are one, and you slowly start feeling the orgasm coming again. 
“I’m close,” you whisper, “Are you?” You ask him because you won’t come again until he does. He knows this. 
His hips are still meeting yours, soft and slow, but with so much passion. His dick hitting your soft spot inside of you, getting you closer to your release. 
He nods, kissing you slowly, and he increases his speed on your clit. You both keep staring at each other, panting only getting louder, whines getting closer together, your legs are shaking slightly, his hips are moving faster and sloppier, and you’re waiting for him to reach his orgasm. 
You feel your orgasm at the brink of taking over you when Draco orders, “Come for me.” 
Instincly, both of your hands intertwined together tightly. 
You cry out as your orgasm takes over your body, shaking entirely, his hips moving into you as he releases into your pussy at the same time you do, and you pull him into a kiss to ride out both of your orgasms. 
“I love you,” he whispers into your mouth, his hips still moving underneath you as you both ride out your orgasms, he’s filling you up deep with his cum, and you kiss him harder. 
“I love you. I love you. I love you,” you repeat into his mouth, tears running down your face, and you feel tears running down his as well. 
“It’s always been you. Always.”
You cry at his words, you both pull away from each other, foreheads leaning together, still connected, and feeling the post-orgasm bliss. 
You look into his eyes, wondering how you could never tell how much he loved you, and you smile at him with tears in your eyes. 
“You’re my best friend,” he admits with a smile. 
He’s so in love with you. 
You cry out a giggle, placing your hands on his face, kissing him slowly, “You’re my best friend.” You never thought you’d be in this situation.
Finally.
You can feel it all around. All you feel is love. Love between you and Draco. There’s nothing but silence in this room, but you know he feels it too. 
You’re in love with Draco Malfoy. 
And he’s in love with you. 
5K notes · View notes
seeingivy · 4 months
Text
fine line
actor!eren x f!reader
**part of my method acting series
content warning: mentions of SA, addiction, bad workplace environments, shitty adults - protect your peace my babies
an: one I saved sparks for the next chapter so I don't like give someone a heart attack. and brace yourself pookies. this ended up at 16k. also, lmk if the format is confusing. but any memory that's embedded between dialogue is basically being shown in the video - it just makes more sense for me to write it as a visual
songs mentioned: ever since new york by harry styles, clean by taylor swift, all of the girls you loved before by taylor swift, and fine line by harry styles
previous part linked here
--
Tell me something, tell me something You don't know nothing, just pretend you do I need something, so tell me something new Choose your words 'cause there's no antidote For this curse Oh, what's it waiting for? Must this hurt you just before you go?
Eren lets the video play for a whole minute before he abruptly reaches for the remote from your hand and stops the film from playing. The song is burning in his ears - the clip of him blowing out the candles at his tenth birthday party searing his eyes - and the increasing, immense pressure that’s been building, ever since you came back to set, comes to a head in that second. 
So much so, that he has to stop the video. Like fully, take the remote from your hands and pause the video. And when he realizes what he’s done, looking over to his side and finding your wide eyes staring at him, and he swallows the lump of shame that’s in his throat and makes his best attempts to back track. 
He’s already messing this up. Royally. 
“Right. I’m sorry, Y/N. Here.” he murmurs, placing the remote back in the space between the two of you, as he nervously interlocks his own fingers within each other. 
Eren’s mind is in a hundred places right now. Granted, he’s always been one to be stuck where he shouldn’t be, but the regret is scorching deep through him now. 
Maybe he should just tell you straight out. Or take you to Seattle now so that you could all talk about it in person. Or he could have asked Connie to stay, just so that he had some type of moral support instead of your big doe eyes waiting for answers, but-
“Are you okay, Eren?” you ask. 
Eren looks over, mustering his best peachy smile, as he shakes his head. 
“No. I’m fine! I just…had a muscle spasm…. You can play it, it’s just-” 
You squint your eyes in response to his shitty defense, which Eren was expecting, because you were always acutely aware of how Eren was feeling. He was almost convinced that you could read his mind at times, that maybe some part of how he grew up left that part of him underdeveloped, that made him so soulless and unaware when it came to other people. 
Or that really, some part of you still understood him in the way you always seemed to be able to. In a way that no one else really had. Because few could bear close to you - Lana and Connie, even Sukuna to some extent - but there was just something about you specifically that saw him exactly how he was. 
That you always knew his intentions, that he almost never had to say them to you. He never had to explain that big mess that was going on in his head because you were always filling the gap and settling it down before he could even get it out. Like there was some secret language being spoken between the two of you every time you made eye contact. 
He’d figure that this part of the two of you - he had all but demolished it the second he opened his mouth back in Seattle. But it remains whole and intact and is extremely bad for that flaring hopeful feeling that he gets when he’s around you again. 
That the two of you could return back to what you were before, in some shape or form. 
Eren sighs. 
“I’m sorry. I just…got overwhelmed for a second. You can play the video. I-I promise I won’t pause it this time.” 
Your eyes soften - and Eren’s heart twinges - as he musters a smile for you. 
“Are you okay to be watching this with me? I can always watch it alone, Eren.” 
“Yeah, I-” 
“I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable…granted, I’m not sure exactly what it is that I’m watching, but if this…makes you anxious than I don’t want to force you to stomach it just for me.” 
Eren’s heart twinges. That you’re still the same as he left you, so loving that it’s flowing out of you. 
“It’s not just for you. Not that I’d be opposed to doing it but-” 
Eren swallows hard. 
“I should be here, Y/N.” he murmurs. 
“Okay. Well-” 
“And you’re watching a movie. A documentary feels like…the wrong word for it? But I guess that’s what it is?” Eren murmurs. 
“A documentary?” 
Eren swallows hard. 
“Do you remember that interview you did? When you became a triple threat?” Eren asks. 
You nod. 
“This is like if I did the interview. Like songs, album, the whole thing. And if other people were involved. And-” 
“Album? You made an album, Eren?” you ask, suddenly excited at the prospect of it. 
Eren was never one to push too hard into music, since he felt that his talents clearly resided in acting. The few times that he had written something was because certain things, mainly you, had left him so inspired and your little rambligns and notes had rubbed off on him. 
And when he missed you terribly, it seemed that the only thing that seemed to remedy it in some sense was writing songs about it. Granted, Lana almost kicked him out of her house for the sad piano he always seemed to be playing, which she claims wasn’t a good influence, but it made a good backtrack for the movie. 
“Yeah, well. You’re quite the inspiration.” Eren respond. 
You roll your eyes, lightly reaching over to shove his shoulder. Except he grabs your hand right before you can, his eyes fixed on his hand all but engulfing yours. 
“I’m being serious. You-you’re the only reason that I wanted to do this. That I was able to.” Eren whispers. 
You tilt your head to the side. 
“You’ve always been like this. So…adamant on the side of talking about things. About not holding it in. I remember when you did the whole “The Man” thing with Historia you literally had me scared shitless. That people were going to put your head on a stick and start coming for you.” 
“I remember. But they didn’t and-” 
“And then you did the same thing with Lana. About Ricky - and you don’t even know the half of it when it comes to that guy. You’ve proven it to me time and time again. That maybe…talking things out is the best way to do it. And granted, I’ve taken so long to get to that point but I-” 
“It’s okay. I just-” 
“It’s not okay. I want you to know that I don’t think what I did was right in any way. I literally made the wrong decision at every turn, and hurt you because of it, and I’m so sorry that I did because you have to know that you mean-” 
Eren freezes, as you wrestle your hand out of his, and place both of your hands firmly on his shoulders. 
“Eren. Just…stop panic explaining. Let me listen first.” you murmur. 
“I know. Sorry, you’re right, I just-” 
“Don’t apologize. I’m sure this is nerve wracking in ways that I can’t understand.” you respond. 
“You’ve always understood me.” Eren murmurs, immediately regretting it the second it leaves his mouth. 
Eren watches as you smile at him, soft and all the way up to your eyes, as you let go and reach for the remote. You give him a nod as you unpause the video again to a clip of Eren. 
At his tenth birthday, blowing out the candles, while he sings in the background. 
Oh, tell me something I don't already know Oh, tell me something I don't already know Oh, tell me something I don't already know Oh, tell me something I don't already know
--
The video starts the last place you expect it. With Zeke sitting in front of the camera, hand knotted together in the same way you’ve seen Eren’s a hundred times, as he retells the story of the day his grandmother passed away when Eren was eleven and Zeke was seventeen.  
After forty-five minutes, Eren has definitively decided that he hates hospital. The anti-septic smell seems to bite at his nose, the receptionist keeps eyeing them awkwardly over the top of her desk trying to pinpoint where it is that she knows him from, and his parents and Zeke are uncharacteristically silent. 
Eren reaches for Zeke’s wrist, which Zeke welcomes with a smile, as they both nervously eye their parents at their side. Eren’s not entirely sure why - since to his understanding, his grandmother is still alive for right now - but his mom has been crying for a better half of the past day, while his dad holds down the fort and does his best efforts to keep it together. Eren appreciates the small smiles that he spares for the two of them every now and then, as they all sit quietly in the waiting room. 
Zeke taps Eren on the shoulder, gesturing for him to follow him for a walk, which Eren is all but happy to oblige in, as the two of them quietly make their way down the ward. 
“Where are we going?” 
“Cookies. They have them out for New Year’s Day, Eren.” Zeke responds, looking down to give him a smile. 
Eren frowns, forgetting that the start of the new year was so close, as they walk into the little aisle. The room is decorated with hanging lights, left over from Christmas, as the two of them sit on the chairs and split the hard, crumbly cookies between the two of them. 
“Is grandma going to die or something?” Eren asks, swinging his legs off the tops of the tall chair as he leans back. 
“I don’t know, Eren. Maybe.” Zeke responds, swallowing hard.
“Oh.” 
“There’s no need to be sad about it before it happens. But Dad told me earlier, it would probably be today or tomorrow so…you should be aware of that.” Zeke states. 
Eren frowns. And Zeke recoils, at his rather blunt way of telling Eren the harsh news. 
“He didn’t tell me that.” Eren states. 
“Well, you’re younger, Eren.” Zeke responds. 
“That doesn’t mean I didn’t deserve to know.” 
Zeke brings his hand down on Eren’s hair, ruffling with it as he looks out the window. 
“That’s why I told you, kid.” 
Eren sighs. 
“Thanks.” 
Zeke shakes his head, as he gestures for Eren to join him at looking outside. The hospital workers are taking down the tree outside, as the two of them rest their windows against the sill and watch the snow fall down. 
 “Can we have hot chocolate when we go home?” Eren asks. 
“You’re old enough to make your own hot chocolate, Eren.” Zeke deadpans. 
“But you just make it so much better. Plus, don’t you want to be a good older brother?” Eren asks, giving him his best peachy smile. 
“I am a good older brother.” 
“You know what would make you even better?” 
Zeke rolls his eyes. 
“Hot chocolate?” 
Eren fakes a gasp. 
“It’s like you’re reading my mind! That’s a great idea, Zeke.” Eren responds. 
Zeke shoves Eren as the two of them laugh, reaching for another one of the hardened cookies on the platter. And that’s when they’re met with the flash of the camera and three paparazzi standing right behind them. Zeke turns around, entirely confused, as they shove the microphone into his face. 
“Zeke. Are do you have any comments on the rumors that you’re a drug dealer?” 
“The rumors that I’m what?” Zeke asks. 
Eren looks up at Zeke, entirely floored by the question, as the bright lights shine in his face a few more times. Zeke’s standing in front of him, basically obscuring his line of vision, as he watches the confusion spread on Zeke’s face and the way his jaw is tightly held against his skull. 
“A drug dealer. Through the funds in your back accounts?” 
“That’s not what I used them for. I used them for-” 
Eren watches Zeke’s face pale, as he grabs Eren’s hand tightly by the wrist and runs back into the waiting room where their parents are sitting. Except when they reach that spot, the doctor they’d seen hours prior is standing there with them, uttering the last words that Zeke could possibly want to hear at this moment. 
“We’re so sorry for your loss but-” 
And he’s cut off abruptly, by the paparazzi, who continue to flash more pictures as the Eren takes in the words, his parents crying demeanor, and understands in full that his grandmother is gone. And looks up at Zeke, unable to recognize his older brother for the first time. So meek, so awkward unlike he’s ever seen him. 
The video cuts off of the pictures of the four of them - of their pink faces and teary eyes in that waiting room - and back to Zeke, as he continues to explain. 
“That was the first time that the rumor had come to the surface, reached me in full. I later found out that there had been multiple reports of it for three days prior, that people had been speculating for days and days, and chose to finally ask me what I had thought when I was in the most headline worthy position. A few feet away from my dead grandmother. And my beloved little brother.” Zeke adds. 
You feel Eren shift next you as the video switches, this time to Sukuna. You smile, not having seen him or heard of him in so long, sparing a good thought from the writhing in your chest at the previous story. The mere presence of him, of his voice, makes your chest rumble. 
“My name is Ryomen Sukuna. And I met Scott Clarkson for the first time when I was fifteen.” 
Sukuna tries his best to not be jealous of his brother. He’s always hated that sick, rotting feeling in his stomach, and he despises that it comes up so unexpectedly, something so negative towards someone who is so unwholly undeserving of it. 
Sukuna always thought it was quite ironic that the two of them were siblings. They were such polar opposites - Yuuji being the picture-perfect, kind, intelligent person that he was. Being those things, so good, it just came so naturally to him that he made it look effortless. 
Meanwhile, Sukuna wasn’t quite sure why he acted the way he did sometimes. Sukuna knew that he wasn’t a malicious or evil person, that deep down his intentions were always well meaning, but there was a small part of him that had always struggled with that part. He knew that he wasn’t a visicous dog, but he wasn’t sure why he bit. 
It was just so hard for Sukuna. Being kind. Effortlessly kind, compassionate, and warm. He’d always say too much, be too loud, or too rude or impolite that it made it made him feel like some part of him was defective. That unbeknownst to other people, who just assumed that Sukuna was just like this, that he was hateful at heart, there was always a withstanding weight of guilt that he held with him wherever he went.  
Until he saw an opening. At one of those god awful, stupid networking events that he was always forced to go to. 
“Are you Ryomen Sukuna?” 
He looks up to find an adult, mid-forties, looking down at him. He’s wearing a nice, pressed down suit as he joins Sukuna on the floor, where he’s been demolisihing the cookie he was given into a crumbled up, chocolate mess. 
“Yes. Who are you?” 
“My name is Scott Clarkson. I’m a producer for Stone Studios. It’s nice to meet you.” 
“It’s nice to meet you too.” 
Sukuna falls into silence, as he tries his best to awkwardly shuffle his mess to the side and be as professional as he could. 
“You have a brother, correct?” Scott asks. 
Sukuna sighs, knowing all too well what’s coming next. 
“Yes, that’s right. He’s over there, standing with the tall, black-haired kid. Kinda sea urchin-y if you ask me.” Sukuna responds, pointing over to the two of them standing by the lemonade. 
Scott shrugs, crossing his hands together in his lap. 
“Tell me about his work ethic.” Scott asks. 
“Well, he’s great. He’s basically the best person to be around - I mean he’s intelligent, smart, and talented. There’s a reason that he’s in almost every movie that you see. And on top of that, he’s extremely patient and kind too. You’d be lucky to work with him, if that’s what you’re considering.” 
Scott looks over at him, eyes narrowed. 
“That’s your mistake, kid.” Scott states, the look in his eyes cold. 
“What do you mean?” 
“You should be marketing yourself. Not your brother.” Scott asks. 
Sukuna turns his head to the side, confused. 
“What? But you asked?” 
“That’s the thing. Even if someone asks about him, you should always divert the attention. To yourself. Granted, this is the reason that he’s the one who just starred in a movie while you’re waiting during the Jujutsu Kaisen hiatus.” 
Sukuna frowns, an acidic feeling crawling down the length of his throat. 
“Well-” 
“I’m just saying, kid. You should learn to advocate for yourself. There’s nothing wrong with pushing a few people around, because that’s kind of what this industry requires. You’ve got guts and talent, more than you’re wish washy brother I’m sure of it. I mean, the whole good boy bad boy thing has worked well for you so far, but if you want any chops at a real career, with people like I’ve worked with, you’ll have to solidify on these types of things.” Scott states. 
Sukuna looks straight across at the movie poster splayed on the wall. With “Institute Award Winning” and “Scott Clarkson” inscribed in it at the bottom. 
“Granted, you’re just a kid. You need someone to give you this kind of advice, an adult who knows their way around the industry. If you ever need my help, you know who to call. I could give you any type of role. Even one as the lead, as the hero, if you ever wanted it.” Scott states, sliding a silver business card into his hands and shuffling off the floor to walk away. 
The video cuts back to Sukuna, cracking his fingers as he talks - something you know well is a nervous tick of his. 
“The conversation seems quite ironic in hindsight. Scott Clarkson was the first adult in my life, one of many, that didn’t have my best interests at mind. And is most surely the last person you should take advice from.” Sukuna states. 
The video switches to Lana - and your heart clenches again, maybe even more than it did for Sukuna - at her long, brown hair and warm, pink cheeks smiling into the camera. You notice that she has a tattoo inscribed on her forearm now, a tiny little teddy bear just above the crease of her elbow, where you and Eren have your fish tattoos. 
“I’ve dreamt about being in love since I was a little kid. There was a part of me, that yearned so hard, wanted it so bad, that I would do anything for it. Even convince myself it was real.” 
Lana was convinced, for a fact, that because she had seen the worst of the worst, that she could only be subjected to the best of the best. 
That she had been so acutely aware, known from such a young age, all the signs of a terrible marriage, a loveless relationship. That you should always thank each other for the small actions, make time to see each other at least once a day, and that a true, earnest relationship takes honest work. Real effort. 
And she wasn’t exactly religious per say. But after the night had settled down, the screaming behind her door ceasing in full, she’d lift her head to the sky and whisper it into the air. Because if she put it out there, every night, and wanted it really badly, that it would happen. That manifestation or some higher power or some law of attraction - that saw that she had been through the bad so she deserved the good - would hear her out. 
And when she was nineteen years old staring at the two little lines on the pregnancy stick, she realized that no such thing existed. That manifestation was made up, that the higher powers didn’t exist or they hated her, or that maybe she had done something really horrible, so malicious, that she had to be tortured in this life for what she had done in the previous. 
Because, of course, she’s pregnant with the last person she’d ever want her kid to have as a father. 
There’s an incessant pounding on the door, as she wipes the tears off of her face, and hides the stick in the bowl of the toilet. 
“What the fuck is taking you so long, Lana?” 
“Nothing, Ricky. I think I might have a stomach bug or something.” she responds, swinging the door open to his unamused face. 
He looks up at her, almost sneering, before glancing at her up and down. He returns to aimlessly scrolling on his phone, before talking again. 
“Well, you’re still well enough to go out tonight, right? Because I don’t want to go to the bar alone.” 
Lana swallows hard, debating her options. 
“Um, well-” 
“Because I could easily take someone else.” Ricky states. 
“No! I’ll come, it’s just that-” 
“Perfect! You’re the best.” Ricky states, pressing a kiss to her cheek before padding out of the room. 
The video switches again, this time to Connie, slightly blurry through the tears in your eyes. You only realize you were crying because Eren’s hands are quick to swipe the tears away and hold a tissue out for you at your side.. You’re not sure what caused it exactly - the thought of Ricky or of Lana so scared alone in that bathroom by herself - but Eren keeps his hand on your shoulder, grounding you into the moment to focus on what Connie was saying. 
“When I was a kid, my mom used to kind of parrot the same stories about me as a kid to every person that she knew. I always used to make fun of her for it, claim that she harped on those four or five stories so hard because she couldn’t remember anything else substantial from my childhood, which was why she felt the need to always tell those embarrassing stories about me.” 
Connie breaks a smile, it reaching all the way to the crinkles in his eyes, as he continues. 
“But there’s one story that she told, that always used to make me a little bit happy. My heart a little warm, if you will. My mom always proudly recounted, with her hand placed over her heart, that I was the happiest baby. That my doctor had mentioned to her that it was very rare for him to see babies who smiled, so quick in their first day of life, but I had done it when he walked into the room. And since then, my mom has always lovingly called me her smiley boy.” Connie states. 
Connie drops his smile, before swallowing hard. 
“Which is how I know that I wholeheartedly broke her heart when she came to see me in rehab.” 
At the one month mark of being there, Connie was slowly but surely acclimating to the life in the rehab ward. The set routine of the place, the small activities that they did in groups, were quickly starting to grow on Connie and the physical effects of his body fighting against him lessening more every day. 
Today was a big achievement for him. He had finally made it through his first night of soundless sleep. And he was looking forward to today, which was Friday, meaning that Eren and possibly Lana would be visiting him. And they’d be so excited, so happy that it was working for him, that he wanted to tell him the second that he got there. 
So when the clock hit two o’clock, he excitedly walked in the visiting room to find Eren sitting there, with his steaming bowl of ramen that Eren had promised he would bring him next time. Connie finally understood why you fell in love with him all of those years ago. He’d marry Eren too if it meant he would cook for him all the time. 
“Hey Connie.” Eren states, sliding the bowl over to him. 
“Eren Bear-en. Where’s Lana?” he asks. 
“Right. She’s here. In the waiting room.” Eren states. 
“What the hell is she doing out there? Laying eggs?” Connie asks, splitting the chopsticks in his hand as he opens up the bowl. 
“Yes, actually. The kitchen came by and told her they were short.” 
“Don’t even joke about that because those bitches are crazy. I asked for an extra Jello and from the looks they gave me you’d think I was asking to be their…sperm donor or something.” 
Eren snickers, before getting an intense look from the guards on the wall for disrupting the silence, and looking back at Connie. 
“No. No, she’s actually keeping your mom some company.” 
Connie pales. 
“My mom is here?” he states, his voice grating in his throat. 
“Yeah, Connie. She doesn’t want to push and-and- she’s more than willing to go home if you’re not ready to see her yet, man. She just really insisted and she means so well that we just brought her along.” Eren states. 
“Have you been talking to her?” Connie asks. 
“Oh, yeah. She called us almost two days after you got here. We let her know what was happening and she comes by the house a lot. She asks about you the second we get back.” Eren responds. 
“Really?” Connie asks, warm tears filling his eyes. Of agonizing, burning regret. 
“Really. She’s been waiting till you seemed better, that you were ready to see her. And you don’t have to worry that she’s judging you or upset with you, man. She feels the same as Lana and I do, you- she shouldn’t be a reason for your stress. Or guilt.” Eren adds, emphasizing it as hard as he can so as to convince Connie to at least let her through. 
Connie pauses, the thoughts swimming to his mind. The overwhelming regret, that his mom has suffered all the way to meet him here, that she was ready to be at his side, the same way Eren and Lana had. He’s almost grateful that she hadn’t seen him at the worst of it - that he hadn’t shouted choice words at her like he had at Eren and Lana and you - but the embarrassment of having to recount all of that to her was daunting. 
But the thought of seeing her again, hearing that she was out there waiting with that heathen Lana, warmed that deep seated love for her in his stomach. That was yearning to see her, to tell her what had happened to him too. 
The latter feeling beat out the former one. Which is why he let Eren bring her in with Lana, as she took a cautious seat at his side and Lana slid into the one next to Eren. 
“Hi Connie Bear!” Lana states, reaching over to squeeze his hands. 
“Hi Lana Bear.” he respond, lifting his hand to do his little hand shake with Lana, which always earns him an eye roll from Eren. 
“Bear?” Connie’s mom asks, tilting her head to the side. 
“Ah. It’s just a little joke that we have. Eren Bear-en started it.” Connie states, giving him mom a smirk.
His mom smiles, looping her arm through Connie’s, as she lightly laughs into the quiet air. 
“Funny. So what would I be?” 
“Mama Bear. Obviously.” Connie states. 
She pauses, pressing her hand to Connie’s shoulder. 
“How are you, Connie? Really?” 
Connie smiles, leaning forward on the table and nervously fidgeting with his fingers. 
“I have some good news actually. For all of you.” Connie responds. 
“What’s that?” Eren asks. 
“I know that it doesn’t seem like a big deal and all and that people do it all the time but…today was the first night that I slept all the way through without waking up in the past month. In the past year actually.” 
Lana and Eren’s eyes immediately light up, which has Connie smiling, as the two of them run over to the side of his table and wrap his arms around him. His mom’s looped into his side, the three of them crushing him in the warmest, softest hug known to man.
“Connie! We’re- fuck. I’m literally crying. I’m so happy for you, kid.” Lana states, reaching forward to pinch the softness on his cheek. 
“Okay, you sap. It’s not all that.” Connie responds.
“No but it literally is, Connie. This is huge.” Eren responds, squeezing his shoulder hard. 
Connie turns to his mom noticing that she’s been trying her best efforts to quiet her sobs. Connie places a hand on her shoulder, burning with regret, at her downtrodden face. 
“Mom?” 
“Oh, Connie. My sweet, smiley boy. I’m so happy for you.” 
It’s enough to break his resolve, one that he’s been keeping together since he realized that he had all but gone through Jean and Mikasa’s engagement high. And cries straight into her arms, with Lana and Eren across from him, lightly tapping his feet under the table in support. 
The video switches, this time to Eren, as you prepare yourself for whatever you’re about to hear next. Because if the previous four were gut punches, you know for a fact that whatever Eren is about to say is going to ruin you. 
“Being in love is a privilege.” 
You take a sharp inhale. 
“There’s something so strange about it, when you think about it. That there can be two people, who share those feelings at the same time. That they overcame something, deeper than rejection or fear, because the feelings were so big, they were so great, that they just had to. And that the person, they really and truly reciprocated it.” 
Eren smiles, so wide that his dimples are showing. 
“It’s a privilege to be in love. But it’s an even bigger one to be in love, to be loved, by someone like Y/N L/N.” 
Eren and Jean, with their ears all but pressed to the door, hear the three knocks and wrestle over each other to open the door. You’re standing there, sheepish and meek as you look down the hall, and Eren reaches for your bag on the floor. Jean gives the two of you a salute, which you laugh at, and which consequently has Eren smacking his hand over your mouth for, as the two of you quickly switch spots. 
WIth Jean in your room and you in his. Eren quickly shuts the door, setting your stuff down, as you two give each other excited smiles. 
“That was super sneaky, Eren. Like Bond level.” 
Eren rolls his eyes. 
“Right. The two feet in between our doors was so treacherous.” 
You smack his shoulder. 
“Okay, bitch. You know nothing of my perilous travels. The floorboard creaked. I could hear Levi rustling in his sheets, I swear to god.” 
Eren drags your stuff into the room, as he places your bag on the bed. 
“What do you have in here? Your entire closet? Why is this so heavy?” 
“Well, I had to bring my night time skincare. And my morning skincare. And sometimes I get snacky at night…and my blanket obviously. And my shampoos. Those are non-negoitable.” you respond. 
“Well we can’t have you getting split ends now!” Eren responds, sarcastically. 
“Don’t even sass me right now because I could go bald without that shampoo.” 
“And I have a blanket.” 
You scoff.
“I don’t want your cooties, stinky.” 
“I don’t have cooties. And mind you, you have to kiss me in a few weeks. My cooties are going to be all up in your face, Y/N.” Eren responds. 
“That sounds gross, Eren. Like you’re purposely infecting me with your disease.” 
“I’m not infecting you with anything! I don’t even have cooties, you idiot!” 
You feign hurt, frowning at him, as you fight the urge to laugh and muster the most important performance of your life yet. 
“Eren?” you whisper. 
“What?” he asks, confused. 
“Do you really think I’m an idiot?” you murmur. 
You watch Eren’s eyes go wide, almost frazzled, as he reaches forward and cups the side of your cheek, the look in his eyes so painful that you immediately feel bad. 
“Y/N. Of course, I don’t think you’re an idiot. You’re like…the smartest person I know. Really.” 
“Eren-” 
“I’m so sorry I said that. I was just kidding, but that was a really stupid joke to make. I haven’t and won’t ever think that about you. Or say it again. You’re so-” 
“Eren.” 
“And I swear, I’m not going to say anything like that ever again. I know how shitty it can be, especially coming from a guy, and you’re working so hard to be here, more than anyone else, even though your basically the best one and-” 
“Eren, oh my gosh, you’re so sweet. I was just kidding, I didn’t mean to make you so upset.” you respond, frowning at him as he looks at you, shoulders relaxing under his touch. 
His cheeks are dusted a warm pink, the color trickling down the length of his neck. 
“Oh. Wait, really?” 
“I was just trying to see what you would say. I wasn’t expecting that and now I feel really, really bad. I’m sorry, Eren.” 
Eren sighs, laughing as he reaches forward to pinch your cheek. 
“You’re evil, you know that?” 
“I didn’t mean it!” you whine, covering your eyes in embarrassment. 
“You put that stupid little cute frown on your face and make those sad eyes at me and just expect me to keep fighting with you?” 
“Well, yeah! Jean and Connie would fight with me for the rest of their life if they could.” 
Eren reaches forward, pinching your cheek once more. 
“That’s your mistake.” 
“What is?” 
“Thinking that you and I are the same as you and Connie. Or you and Jean.” 
You feel your cheeks burn, as you nod, reaching for your bag and heading straight into the bathroom to arrange everything on the counter. You start your nightly routine, braiding your hair and placing the little foam headband in your hair as you start to massage all the cleansers and serums into your skin. 
Eren pads in after a few minutes, reaching for his toothbrush, as the two of you move around each other in silence. Eren can’t help but watch you in the mirror - with all your little bottles and sweet smelling lotions, so focused as you go about it - that he can’t help but think that he could watch you forever. 
“Eren?” 
Eren immediately breaks out of his almost trance, spitting into the sink. 
“Yeah?” 
“You should wear this while you brush your teeth. It’ll keep your hair out of the way.” you respond, handing him a little blue foam headband just like your pink one. 
“Huh?” 
“Well, your hairs getting kind of long. And Levi told me that he actually wants it even longer for next season a few months ago, so I ordered you one too when I got mine. I keep forgetting to give it to you.” you respond, placing it front of him. 
Eren lifts it in his hands, utterly touched at the fact that you had thought of him. 
“You- you got this for me?” 
“Well, yeah. I kept getting my bangs wet whenever I washed my face. And you basically look like a shaggy dog with that hair so I knew for a fact that you’d need one too. I’m basically the best friend ever if you think about it.” you respond, giving him a peachy smiile. 
“You are.” 
The video cuts back to Eren, a soft smile on his face as he talks. 
“People will take advantage of anything, in the name of business. It’s an easy way in once you find out how to manipulate someone, to make them do things that they would never do normally, to get the exact image that you want. The one that makes headlines, stirs up controversy, to get you trending.” 
--
“You find out that things function very specifically when you work at Stone Studios. And that Scott Clarkson, and his associates, make money from every aspect of the production. He makes money from the movies that he produces and more importantly, from the tabloid company that he owns.” Sukuna starts. 
Sukuna sighs, as the pictures flash on the screen. 
“Certain things are…manufactured or at least the people doing them are coerced into doing things that are lucrative. Like doctoring drama around certain movies, so that by the time the movie comes out, the drama surrounding it will drive everyone to watch it. Around relationships - because rumors regarding ex-boyfriends and problems between friends create headlines that everyone will click.” 
Sukuna’s furious. And when Hyla walks in the room - the three weeks he’s been holding onto his anger - come to a head. 
“Who did you tell?” Sukuna asks. 
She looks up at him, eyes wide in confusion, as she slouches straight into the bed and continues to scroll on her phone. He joins at her side, reaching for her phone and putting it to the side. 
“I’m being serious. Who did you tell?” he asks. 
She looks up at him, her expression bordering between bored and oblivious. 
“Who did I tell about what?” 
Sukuna sighs. Because deep down, that deep rot of feeling betrayed has been gnawing at his stomach for the past few hours. And he wants everything in him, every part of him to believe that the conversation that he had a few days ago - the first real one he’d had in a while - wasn’t just spread all over every magazine he walked past on the way home. 
“The conversation we had. About…” 
She rolls her eyes, sitting up as she crossed her legs. 
“About what? We talk about a lot of things.” she murmurs. 
“Yuuji…” he responds. 
“Oh! About how you hate him?” she asks. 
Sukuan sighs, frustrationg growing up at the premise. At the callousness in her statement. Because not only did she put up a front in the conversation they had - about how guilty Sukuna felt about harboring some negative feelings towards Yuuji since they were always in constant competition - but she was surely the one who must have whispered the story to someone who had given it to a tabloid. 
“I don’t hate him, Hyla.” 
“No, no I get it. You’re like jealous of him and stuff because he gets all these versatile roles and you basically keep getting the same asshole role. But that’s not your fault, it’s just how it goes.” she responds, shrugging. 
He clenches his jaw. 
“I get that. I just don’t get why you had to tell someone else.” 
“Well, I just told my dad. And you know how he is. If there’s something that’s going to be good for the business, he’s always been the kind of guy to go for it and do what needs to be done.” 
“What the hell is so lucrative about my relationship with my brother? We’re filming a fucking movie.” 
She sighs, cracking her knucles before she turns to him. 
“Okay, fine. I’ll tell you a secret, but only if you promise to stop being mad at me.” 
“Well, I’m not just going to stop being mad at you. I’ve never told anyone that. Let alone my own brother, whose probably finding out about it from a fucking tabloid right now. I’ve never been one - nor am I ever going to be - someone who steps on their own family members to make it in this fucking business.” he states. 
“Yeah, yeah. I know. Family is everything to you and I get that.” 
He sighs, sliding open his phone to the five unread messages from Yuuji on his screen. There a set of pictures of him in front of the headlines at the store and he’s quite literally laughing at the fact that someone could even come up with something so stupid about him. 
Because despite it all, Yuuji is exactly what Sukuna says he is. He is the better brother - by tenfold - because he sees the rumors and doesn’t even believe them the second he reads them. Even through they’re true. 
“See. He’s such a good guy, he’s not even mad! No harm done!” Hyla states, smiling to herself. 
Sukuna leans back against the headboard, fully bothered, so much so that it makes his skin itch, by Yuuji’s texts as he halfheartedly murmurs. 
“What were you going to say? Earlier?” 
“Oh. Well don’t tell anyone. Especially not the girls okay, because they’d basically kill me. But you know WBS? The tabloid company?” she asks. 
“Yeah…” 
“My dad owns it. That was actually his original venture. He started it with these two music producers - Danny and Sareen - they work with that Y/N girl from Attack on Titan actually. And sometimes they just kind of….fabricate stuff for news. Whatever sells right?” 
Sukuna swallows that bitter, acidic feeling in his throat. That his feelings about his brother, that he shared in confidence, were good enough for the headline. 
Good enough to be sold out. 
The camera switches back to Sukuna, sitting in the chair. 
“I feel kind of stupid in hindsight. For actually liking her, I guess. For believing that any of them were real, earnest people. I’m embarrassed that I stayed for so long, on the premise that I was fighting for something real.” Sukuan states. 
“What made you leave?” the producer asks. 
“The last shred of self-preservationist instinct I had. I was put into a situation, multiple times, where I felt unsafe. And when it went too far, I decided that I had enough. And that I was going to go out with a bang if I had to. If they want a headline, I’ll damn well give them one.” Sukuna states, smirking. 
“You felt unsafe?” the producer clarifies. 
“Look. I don’t need to rehash the details out of what happened. I’m sure that you could even find videos of it if you wanted to. But Scott Clarkson, he’s very quick to forget the fact that he’s working with children. I may play adults in my films, but I was very much still a child.” 
You pale, the implication entirely clear. You look over at Eren, whose eyes are fixed towards the floor, as you wipe the tears from your eyes, as the video switches back to Eren and Lana who are seated at the table. 
“When Levi and Hange ventured out on their own and decided to produce their own show, they ruffled lots of feathers. That’s something I overheard on set quite often before Eren ever started on the show. They were mad, essentially, that they had circumvented the whole producing aspect of it, choosing to be in control of every aspect of the production. And honestly, that they were successful with it.” 
“Levi and Hange basically set a standard, especially for other people who were at their class the SWHA cohort. Jujutsu Kaisen basically followed suit short after - with almost all of the people in our class being funneled into either of those two shows. Which was aggravating, because it basically means that people who own the companies, like Scott Clarkson, don’t get their upcoming crop of stars to handpick form.” Eren states. 
“Unfortunately for us, that didn’t really quite stop them. It started out with a simple fact - that Scott Clarkson knew for a fact that Eren would refuse to work with him.” Lana states. 
“The first time I met Scott Clarkson he had rubbed me the wrong way. Because he refused to acknowledge that Y/N was standing right at my side.” Eren responds. 
Eren was painfully aware of the fact of how uncomfortable you were. He wasn’t exactly sure what it was - maybe the fact that you had never been here before or that you didn’t quite know anyone like he did from growing up with them - but he figured that it would be a better idea for the two of you to go outside. 
But before he could, a man stops him, tapping him on the shoulder to talk to him. You both stop in your tracks, half turning around, to look at him. He’s extremely tall, looming over the two of you, and Eren can feel you shrink at his side. He looks at Eren, a self-assured smile pressed on his face as he introduces himself. 
“Scott Clarkson. I’m a producer for Stone Studios.” 
“I’m Eren Jaeger. This is-” 
“I know who you are, Eren. I was invited to see one of the first cuts of the latest movie you just filmed and-” 
Before he can even understand what’s happening, he has his hand on Eren’s shoulder and they’re walking down the length of the hall, the end of their conversation lost to you. Eren looks back and you give him a halfhearted smile as he tries to turn back, before getting stuck in a larger group of people. 
“Do you have any projects lined up for your Attack on Titan hiatus?” Scott asks. 
“Yeah. Sukuna and I are filming the next Conjuring movie. Though if you’re looking for someone, my friend Y/N-” 
“No need. We’re here to talk about you.” 
Eren rolls his eyes. 
“I already have a roll. And she doesn’t. And you know how big she’s going to be - she can even sing!” Eren states. 
Scott sighs. 
“There’s a reason that I’m standing here talking to you. I’m well seasoned in these type of things - just like your parents. I promise you, with a breakout show like that, only one person can come out as the star. Don’t you want to make sure that it’s going to be you?” 
“Levi and Hange made it out together. I don’t know why we couldn’t do the same.” Eren responds. 
Luckily enough for him, his parents had arrived just at that moment and given him his much needed chance to run away. 
“I wasn’t going to sell out that fast. Especially for someone who was so quick to bad mouth my best friend, who was basically the only person that I got to consistently talk to and be with at the time, I….” 
“Eren’s very loyal. Let’s just leave it at that. And it’s precisely just because of that loyalty, especially to Hange and Levi who had thrown a wrench in every one of his profits, that they wanted Eren specifically. He has every makings of one of his stars. He has famous parents, an estranged brother, and a girl that can be thrown at the end of every headline.” Lana adds. 
Eren sighs. 
“The Attack on Titan hiatus was the perfect chance for them to get what they wanted. On one side, Danny and Sareen were building Y/N up. They were pushing her into making albums, way faster than she should have been by the way, adding more and more accolades to her name. And on the other side, they were dragging me into the mud. Purposely switching my movies at the last minute to make sure I was on the shitty one, making award show annoucers make crappy jokes about me so I’d feel like shit.” Eren responds. 
The video switches to the last award show that you and Eren had technically attended together. The one where you announced that you were coming out with your second studio album and where you had won Actress in a Lead Role. Except, the video isn’t how you remembered it. Or that this time, you’re actually aware of what had been going on in Eren’s head. 
“Here we have an international pop-star, Y/N L/N. Originally a small town girl from Canada, her soft spoken love songs, phenomenal acting, and insane dance act have left no heart untouched.” the announcer states. 
Eren looks over at you in the video, his eyes so warm and his smile so wide, as he looks at you proudly. 
“And you. What’s your name again? It’s sweet they let fans sit with stars now.” the headliner asks him, eliciting a large amount of laughter from the crowd as he walks on. 
That’s when you see it. That Eren’s face immediately dropped and was washed over in shame. And that he got up and walked away. 
And more importantly, that you hadn’t followed. 
“I later found out that joke was very deliberate. That announcer was told to make that joke about me because they were almost positive that I would leave. And when Y/N won the award - and I was moping in one of the lounges about how much of a failure I was, how she was going to leave me for someone better - Scott Clarkson approached me. In the same way that he had approached Sukuna. Promising me that he could make me a star. That I could meet Y/N where she was and be next to her too.” Eren states. 
“It was pretty easy to guess how the rest went. Y/N and Eren being in a relationship wasn’t exactly headline worthy, when they had been basically attached at the hip for years. But you know what was? The two of them breaking up.” 
“I obviously can’t speak for Y/N. I don’t know what was going through her head at that point. But from what she made it seem like….Danny and Sareen had asked her to do it. I know that they had asked her to write songs like London Boy and most of the songs on her album for that precise reason, it….doesn’t seem far off.” Eren states. 
“It seems stupid in hindsight. To take someone’s advice at the surface level like that and so blindly believe in them. But when you think of the examples that Eren and Y/N really had, people like Levi and Hange who wanted nothing but the best for them, who basically loved them like they were a second set of parents, it’s hard to believe that everyone around you doesn’t really have your best interest in mind. That and the fact that they were fucking nineteen.” Lana adds. 
“And that’s when we get to the Girlfriend incident. And more importantly, the day that Lana and I became friends.” Eren states, looking over to smile at her. 
Eren had locked the door, and pushed everyone out of the room the second they had stopped watching that stupid music video hours ago. And after the fact, he’s watched it three more times - you and Ricky dancing through the street and smiling at each other - while all he can do is drown in his despair. 
That is until he hears a soft sniffling in the hallway behind him and a hushed voice talking on the phone in the doorway. He presses his ear the door, the voice loud, as he catches the ends of the conversation, recognizing that it was Lana. 
“Can you just stay with him for a few more hours, please? I don’t think that I can leave.” 
“Please. I want to come home really badly too, but they’re already so upset with me after what I said last night that I just-” 
“Thank you so much. I really love you, you know that?” 
The phone call ends abruptly and Eren, letting his curiosity get the best of them, opens the door to find Lana sitting flat against the wall, with her head in her hands. He can tell that she must have been crying for a better part of the last hour, her hair all unruly and tangled in a way that he had never really seen it before. 
Eren shuffles into the spot next to her, against the wall, as he wipes his own red eyes. 
“Are you okay?” Eren asks. 
“Why? Trying to rub it in my face?” Lana asks, rather miserably. 
“No. I just…heard you on the phone.” Eren asks. 
Her eyes go wide, as she looks over at him rather frantically. 
“What did you hear?” she asks. 
“I mean, basically nothing.” Eren murmurs. 
The two of them sit there awkwardly, unsure of what to say to the other. That’s until Lana turns to him, a determined look on her face as she talks. 
“Are you trying to make me feel shitty because I did it to you?” Lana asks. 
“No. I’m not you, Lana.” Eren deadpans. 
“I didn’t mean-
“Didn’t mean what? To make me look like a dumbass on stage? Just tell me what the hell is wrong if you’re going to talk so loudly outside of my door.” Eren mutters, irritated. 
“Okay. We’re going to play a game, alright? Let’s pretend we’re different people.” Lana states. 
“What?” 
“I want to talk about something and I’m sure you do too, but it’s weird to do it like this. So we’ll pretend. I’m going to be La-La and you’re going to be Po.” she states. 
“Like the Telletubbies….?” 
“Yeah. Does that work? You can’t say anything to anyone, because….well that would just be fucking rude.” 
“Okay.” 
“Okay, Po. The thing is, I feel really bad. I did this really shitty thing to this guy who seems really nice and all. Except, I was standing on stage and they kind of asked me to do it right then and there so I kind of just went with it.” 
Oh. Eren gets it. This is her weird way of apologizing. 
“Well, why did she do it in the first place?” 
She scoffs. 
“You’re so nosy, bitch.” 
Eren laughs, which has her relaxing her shoulders, before she talks again. 
“Eren. Please don’t tell anyone, okay? This is really serious.” 
Eren breaks, the seriousness in her demeanour stoppign him. 
“I promise. What is it?” 
She sighs, holding out a picture to him on her phone. It’s a picture of her and a little boy, with short, curly brown hair. 
“This is my son. His name is Theodore, but…I call him Teddy. Like…Teddy Bear? And I feel so shitty, Eren but…they kind of hold him against me sometimes when it comes to things like this. So when they ask me to do things, I just do them.” Lana states. 
“They hold you against him?” 
“I mean….I try really hard to protect his privacy, Eren. He’s just a kid. I mean, he’s barely even two years old right now. And I know your parents, I’m sure you know that growing up in the spotlight isn’t the best place to be.” 
Eren frowns, looking down at the picture. He’s never really quite thought it before, but he thinks that Lana is really pretty. Or more appropriately, that Lana looks very pretty when she smiles. And that he’s never seen her smile like this before. 
“I get that. So what do they do? Threaten to tell?” Eren asks. 
“I mean, they usually find out where I’m keeping him. I tend to keep him moving from different houses, with security in all that, to make sure that he’s safe from that type of thing. And-” 
“Does he stay with his dad?” Eren asks. 
Lana sighs, resting her chin against her knees. 
“Eren. Ricky isn’t good news. And your little girlfriend or friend or whatever…she’s in really risky territory right now.” she states. 
“What do you mean?” Eren asks. 
She almost flinches, withholding of what it is exactly that’s on the tip of her tongue. 
“Eren. He’s just not a good guy. You should make sure that someone is with her, that she’s not ever alone with him. Just take my word for it. There’s a reason my son doesn’t get to see him, why I avoid him like the plague.” she states. 
Eren can see the tears filling in her eyes - and makes a mental note to drop the topic and relay the information to Connie or Jean later. 
“I’m not going to tell anyone, Lana.” 
“I know. That’s why I feel even worse. I’m really sorry for what I did, Eren.” 
“That’s okay. Let’s just make a deal.” 
“What’s that?” 
“I’ll help and you’ll help me. Pacts between Tellytubbies are really sacred.” Eren states, feigning seriousness. 
“You’re stupid.” 
“And you’re annoying.” he responds. 
Lana laughs, teary eyed, as she reaches forward and shakes on it. 
“I only became really aware of the problem after Lana had pointed it out to me. And became even more frustrated with them, with all of them, when I had realized what they had been saying to her. Making comments about her body to her, despite the fact that she had literally given birth, and incessantly teasing her about her son, who is basically my favorite person in the world, by the way. That they would purposely put alcohol in her drinks, when she couldn’t drink at the time.” 
The clips cut, this time to Eren and Lana, in a different mix of videos of playing with Teddy. You recongize him straight on, as the kid that you had met with Eren before the two of you had talked on the beach, and feel your heart burn at the fact that you had met Lana’s son and not known it. That Lana and Eren had to fight to make sure that he was safe, that she was doing anything for him. 
“Eren and I basically had an arrangement. We both had houses off of set in Seattle, that we should shuffle him between, along with my brother Landon. There was someone with Teddy at all times, and at that age, he wasn’t really old enough to question the fact. His mom was always there to put him to bed at night, and sometimes his best friend Eren was there to do it too, so it didn’t mean too much to him.” 
Eren sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. 
“It all started going downhill the week that I got hurt. Because, of course, that’s when Connie arrived on set.” 
Lana wasn’t really paying attention when it had happened. Her nose was stuck in her own script, headphones over her ears, as she practiced the next scene she was going to be in. 
When she looked up, three minutes after the fact, that’s when she saw it. That Eren was tangled with the cords that were suspending him in the air and that he was hanging unconscious upside down. 
“What the hell are you doing? Take him down from there.” Lana states, incessantly shaking at Scott’s shoulder as he watched Eren in the viewfinder. 
“What the hell are you talking about, Price?” 
“He’s not fucking breathing. What the hell are you talking about?” 
“He’s acting. Did you not read your script before you got here?” he asks, annoyed as he gestures for the crew around him to continue. 
Lana looks up, every gut feeling of hers screaming in her stomach, as she runs on to the set, climbing on to the makeshift ladder and reaching for Eren stuck between the strings. 
“Eren. Eren, wake up.” 
Except he doesn’t budge in his arms, instead swinging back and forth from the way he’s precariously hanging on the strings. She presses her fingers to his neck, his pulse slightly weak under her fingers, as she can feel the tears burning in her eyes. 
“What the hell is wrong with you guys? Why can’t you just give him a break? He’s been going at it for like four hours.” 
“Price. You’re ruining the shot.” Scott states, rather irritated. 
���Take him down. Now.” 
Scott rolls his eyes, walking over to the switchbox at his side. He reaches for the lever, placing his hand on the stick, as he all but glares at Lana. 
“You want it that bad? Here.” 
And he pushes the lever all the way down, sending Eren straight to the ground on his head. Lana can feel the panic rushing through her as she basically tumbles down, turning Eren’s head over in her hands, and being met with red, warm blood on her hands. She gives a weary eye to the crew, who phone the ambulance, as she follows in her own car. 
“I think that was the first time that I realize that really, truly - these people don’t care about anything but getting the shot. I get that Eren was supposed to look like he was dead in that scene, but tiring him out to get the perfect shot was far from what he needed to do.” 
“I sustained a concussion that left me in the hospital for a week. And I had three long lacerations down the length of my back from the harnesses that we were using, that basically sliced it on impact. That I still have scars from by the way.” Eren states. 
You reach for Eren’s hand, squeezing hard on his wrist, as the video continues. 
“When we finally made it back to set, Connie was there. And it’s not that I don’t love Connie, that I wouldn’t have loved to see him there, but I already knew that it wasn’t going to go well.” Eren states. 
Eren sighs. 
“I know, logically, that you can’t really blame these things on people. That Connie wasn’t my responsibility and that addiction is a real, physical disease that he had to battle against. But I just can’t help but feel like I could have stopped him if I was there.” Eren states. 
“When I got to set, everyone around me hyped me up over the same basic thing. That Eren was out of commission, for reasons that they wouldn’t exactly tell me, and that I should take his spot as the lead. It was only a few days into shooting and that it would be an easy switch if I had just asked Scott if I could take his role.” Connie states. 
Connie sighs. 
“It was a simple thing that they were telling me. That Eren - he had gotten to be the lead role, hundreds of times over. That Levi had picked Eren out of everyone as the best, that he was extra hard on him because he knew that he could make a star. And that really, I had never gotten the same kind of exposure that Eren had, the type that comes from being a lead.” Connie states. 
The video cuts - to videos of Connie and Eren filming on the set of Attack on Titan - the two of them playing pranks on Erwin and Hange together, running around each other between scenes, and laughing at Historia and Ymir walking past. 
“Eren is one of my best friends. I would never want to side swipe him like that, so I decided that I was going to ask Eren for the role. And I was really self-assured that Eren would give it to me. Because he’s always been giving in that sense, he always had been with Armin and Y/N, and he would for me too.” Connie states. 
“Just to clarify, the reason that I didn’t let Connie take the role at that point was because I had quite literally sustained a concussion from doing it. I was never going to let him step into that - no matter how hard he begged me to.” Eren responds. 
“And so I got really hurt by it. And then everyone around me, they kept whispering it in my ear. That Eren couldn’t handle anyone but him being the star. That Eren thought I had no business being there, that I wasn’t made to be in a lead role. And for some reason, I don’t know fucking why, I thought that they were being honest with me. That they were being earnest. They kept bringing up the Girlfriend incident, that Eren was so quick to drag Y/N down the first chance he got, and that he would do the same to me too. I had so much trust in these people that I would do anything to stay friends with them. Because they were real. And unfortunately for me, I did. And one of the shittiest things I ever did was fight with Eren because of it.” Connie stated. 
Eren found out, three months after the fact, that Connie had been doing drugs. He had his suspicions, since Connie had been spending so much time around Myka, and acting so weird and skittish around him that something had to be up. 
So after he dropped Teddy off to Landon’s and head back to set with Lana, the two of them were prepared to talk to him about whatever it was, to clear the air. Except when they got there and knocked on Connie’s door, they found him lying face down on the desk, fast asleep with a small mound of white powder and a small trickle of blood down his nose. 
“Connie. Connie, wake up.” Eren states, rigidly shaking his entire frame. 
“Oh my gosh. Oh my god, Eren what do we do?” Lana states, her hands on his shoulder as he hears her sniffling in his ear. 
“Connie. Dude, you have to wake up now. Come on.” Eren states. 
Connie lightly shuffles in his sleep, as Eren backs up out of the way, with Lana behind him. Connie wakes up, half there, as his eyes focus in on Eren and he pales. That Connie’s giving him the most agitated, mean look that he’s ever gotten in his life. That he’s ever seen Connie sport in his life. 
“Connie. Hey, you-” 
“What do you want, Eren?” he asks. 
“We were just worried about you, dude. We haven’t talked in so long, and that’s our fault, but-” 
“I’m not good enough for you, right? You’re too big of a star to be friends with someone as low on the food chain as me right?” Connie responds, seething. 
Eren frowns. 
“Connie, hey man. What are you talking about? We’ve been like family since we were little. Why would I-” 
“Why didn’t you give me the lead role? Why the fuck are you and Lana always sneaking around behind my fucking back? Don’t play the family card in my face when you’re the one who fucking abandoned me, Eren.” 
“Connie. I’m really sorry that I-” 
That’s when Connie lifts his hand, jolting it straight across Eren’s face. He can feel the immediate, immense pressure on his nose, the bright red shooting out of his nostrils as he looks back up at Connie. 
“Connie. We can’t-” 
“We can’t what? You won’t fight me?” 
“No, Connie. I’m not going to fight you.” Eren states. 
“Why not? You’re still too good for me, aren’t you? You’re too good for Y/N, too good for me, too good for anyone who fucking got you there.” Connie states, swinging again. 
Connie’s movements are loose, uncoordinated, which is when Eren reaches for his arm, just to pin him to the ground underheath him. There’s a sweltering guilt when he does it, holds Connie down, and it only increases in magnitude when Connie cries underneath him, cursing his name. 
“Two weeks after my fight with Connie, my worst possible outcome occurred. That I have friends, who love me more than anything, and wanted to surprise me for my birthday. Y/N and Armin came to Seattle. And Y/N….she wanted to tell me that she still loved me.” Eren states. 
“That was the worst possible time that they could have shown up. Because they were this close to leaking my secret, basically telling me that it was any day now that it was going to happen, after finding out that Eren and I were planning on breaking our contracts, just to be out of the situation for good. We had even reached out to Levi and Hange about it, which they had found out about very fast.” Lana states. 
“I saw Y/N for the first time at my birthday dinner and was immediately floored at the fact that she was there. And Armin had quickly told me, when I had scurried away to the bathroom to check on her, so I knew what I had to do. I left my birthday dinner, with Hyla, to break up with her then and there. When I knew that I had a chance at getting Y/N back.” Eren states. 
“Do you want to get out of here? Just you and me?” 
Hyla gives him a giddy smile as she nods, putting her hand in his, as he drags her out, with his arm secured around his waist. And the second that he can drive them slightly out of earshot, back to the house where he can talk to her in private, there’s a weight that’s lifted off of his chest when he gets to say it. 
“I’m breaking up with you.” Eren states. 
Hyla frowns, squinting her eyes at him. 
“Okay but like…technically, we aren’t even dating. It’s just a publicity thing.” Hyla states. 
“Whatever this is. I want out. I-I’m not doing it anymore.” Eren states. 
Hyla laughs, sitting criss crossed on the couch, as she looks up at him. 
“My dad is going to be super pissed at you, Eren.” 
Eren smiles, lighter than he had been feeling in the four years that he had been stuck in this godforsaken house. Because truly, the reason that had brought him here, didn’t matter anymore. 
Levi and Hange were on his side - and they were going to help him out of this - and more importantly, you were back. The two of you were going to be together again, despite wherever the hell the two of you were going to be stuck. 
“I don’t care. My contrat is almost up anyways. And I can imagine that the same headlines get boring over time, Hyla. I think it’s time to call it quits.” 
Eren looks down at her, busily typing away on her phone, as she looks up at him. 
“Are you sure you know what you’re doing, Eren?” Hyla states. 
“Yeah. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” 
“Fine. You can meet with my dad tomorrow to talk about it. He’s been thinking about bringing Ricky James on for a while anyways.” Eren states. 
“Be my guest. You guys would fucking love him.” Eren states, running off. 
“I was still on Cloud Nine that night. And it was making my skin itch, knowing that Y/N was like four feet away from me and we were going to be together again. So I woke her up in the middle of the night and took her to the beach outside of one of the houses that Lana and I owned. And-” 
Eren tears up in the video, as you fight away the warm tears that are welling in your own eyes. 
“During that entire night, I-I was so fucking happy again. All of the things that seemed so consequential to me when I was seventeen, that I needed to be at the same level as Y/N to be with her - which would basically be impossible, because she was always going to be better than me - seemed so ridiculous. The two of us, we just got to be real people in the second. The way that we always got to be when we were together.” Eren states. 
“The following morning, Scott had shockingly agreed to let Eren and I be dismissed from our contracts, given that we finished off the press deals that we had going on. Which included the interview that we were going to do on the Life in Love podcast. Which should have ben our first, glaring red flag. That of course, we were never going to be let off that easy.” Lana states. 
“It was simple. I guess-I guess I was so fucking happy that I got to talk about me and Y/N, what the two of us coming back together meant to me, that I put it all out there. And the WBS paid off Life in Love and edited the version of the podcast that was released.” Eren states. 
“Granted, the part that’s always floored us that people never questioned it once. That the podcast clip that was released was barely ten minutes, when the episodes are usually an hour. That the podcaster has to ask questions to provoke the answers and that they weren’t even in the fucking video. And most of all - the fact that I didn’t even fucking talk thoughout the entirety of the interview.” Lana adds. 
“I would have told Y/N. I would have told her the full truth then and there and I know that she would have believed me. Except, the person that I least expected, came to me beforehand and stopped me from doing it.” Eren states. 
Eren’s met with an incessant pounding at his door, as he shoves all of his last belongings into his bag, ready to take off with you and Armin - and making your best efforts to drag Connie with you. 
Eren opens the door to find Myka at his door, out of breath and panting. 
“What?” Eren asks. 
“Eren. You can’t leave.” 
“Oh what the fuck do you want now? I’m taking Connie with me and that’s the fucking last of it.” Eren states. 
“No, Eren. Really. You can’t go right now.” she states, pushing into his room and fervently sliding through her phone. 
She hands him over the phone, with the email chain, as he anxiously reads through it and feels his heart drop. 
“There’s no way. They can’t do that right?” 
The email chain has the headlines - printed out and ready for distribution. Of them displaying every one of the last secrets that he wants out there front and center. About Connie being a drug addict, about Lana and Teddy, and of him and Y/N being homewreckers on the beach. 
“It’s just a headline. We’ll be fine.” 
“Eren. I read the article. They wrote about her brother’s in the article. About Lana and Ricky too - in detail.” 
“What do you mean in detail?” 
“They know everything, Eren. About every last detail of what he did to her, Eren. They’re going to put it all out there tomorrow, the second that you leave. And Y/N’s brothers…haven’t they literally been attacked before? This will be tenfold to that, Eren.” 
Eren sighs, shaking the thought from this head. 
“We’ll send them a security detail. And Lana, Connie, they’ll be-” 
“Eren. You know for a fact that Lana doesn’t want anyone to know that he even exists. And Connie’s career. He’s never going to recover from this. And it’s- Y/N won’t be happy, Eren.” She states. 
“So what the hell do you want me to do? Just stay here? Because there’s no way in hell that I’m letting Y/N stay here with me. And I know her - she’s not going to leave here without me.” 
“They have Falco and Colt’s addresses, Eren. And-and don’t tell anyone but fucking Danny and Sareen? Her producers? They’re in on it. Sareen is literally Scott’s cousin, Eren. They’re planning on taking Y/N’s music away from her, so that they can make money off if it without giving her a cut.” 
Eren pales. 
“They’re going to do that if she stays here. And you know for a fact that you can’t leave because Connie won’t go and Teddy and- Eren you have to stay. She has to leave.” 
“I can’t even fucking trust you. I don’t know what shitty game you’re trying to play here but it’s not funny.” 
“I care about you guys.” 
“Yeah right.” 
“Okay, maybe not about you. But Lana….I care about Lana. This is the last thing she would want, she literally works so hard to make sure that no one will know about him for good reason. It would kill her to see it all get leaked.” 
“Who the fuck is Lana to you? You don’t even-” 
Eren understands it all too quickly. The pained flash that overtakes her eyes, the eway she’s so incessantly pleading on Lana’s behalf. 
It’s because she’s in love with Lana. 
Eren sighs, pinching his eyes shut. 
“Do you have the article? I have to read it before I decide.” Eren states. 
She nods, as she opens up the next email chain andhands him the phone. And when he reads through it, each consecutive sentence makes his stomach hurt, making it glaringly obvious what he has to decide. 
Because the all but declare a smear chain against you and your brothers, slut shame you for what happened on he beach, drag Hange and Levi’s name to the blood, and leave no detail of Lana’s relationship with Ricky out. Things that no person should have aired out and Connie’s section nearly career ruining. 
“Fuck. So what do I do? I mean-” 
Eren can feel the tears burning in his eyes, as the leave warm, hot streaks down his skin. 
“You have to make sure she leaves, Eren. You can’t have Y/N stay here. It’ll put things back to normal.” Myka states, downtrodden. 
“She’s not going to leave. If I tell her, she’s going to want to stay with me. To be in my side during this and-” 
“Say what you have to. To make her leave.” 
“Think of the worst possible thing you could say, Eren.” 
“I did what she asked. I-I made sure that she would leave. And in hindsight, the entire situation seems so stupid that me. That there were ten other things that I could have done, but…in that moment, I did what I thought was right.” 
“It was idiotic in hindsight. Because it stopped them from running their smear campaigns on Lana and Connie, but Y/N was the one who got side sweeped in the middle of it.” Connie states. 
“That’s where I came in. Danny and Sareen had reached out to me about everything that had happened with Y/N and Eren. Told me that I needed to amke sure that she came out of this on the other side, that she couldn’t let a guy take her career away from her. And anyone who knows the half of it about me knows for a fact that it was the right thing that they needed me to say, to get her to do it. And really, they had purposely picked everyone who went to see Y/N. Jean, not Mikasa, because he had a personal interest in seeing Eren hurt, because he was hurt too. And Sukuna, who would never advise her head on, but support what she wanted to do in full.” Historia says. 
You groan, hanging your head in your knees as you know exactly what’s coming next. 
That Danny and Sareen had given Scott and his stupid tabloid company exactly what he wanted. That they were the one pushing you to sing all three songs, that each consecutive piece of information made you more irritated, more mad as you went on to perform. And worse than that - Danny and Sareen made it a point to talk to Eren before the show, just to taunt him to his face. 
“I had reached out to Levi and Hange for their help two weeks before the award show happened. And luckily enough for me, they helped us out of the situation, fast. Connie, Lana, Sukuna, and I sued Scott Clarkson for defamation of character, mistreatment of employees, and a dangerous workplace. We got to end our contracts early. And then moved forward.” Eren states. 
The video changes to different clips, each one striking deep in your heart. Of Connie blowing out the candles on his one year anniversary of being sober as Teddy blows out his birthday candles, of Eren and Zeke getting along, and of the four of them all together, laughing at stupid videos of each other. And Eren signing along with Lana, brings the tears pouring down your eyes. 
There was nothing left to do (Oh-oh, oh-oh) When the butterflies turned to dust that covered my whole room So I punched a hole in the roof (Oh-oh, oh-oh) Let the flood carry away all my pictures of you Rain came pouring down When I was drowning, that's when I could finally breathe And by morning Gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean (Oh, oh, oh, oh)
“Make no mistake. There was so much that was taken out of us, in the years that we spent working there at Stone Studios. In being part of an environment that was so shitty, so damaging to who we were and the mental state that we were living in, in the name of making a good movie. But there was good that came out of it too.” 
The clips switch, this time shocking you so deeply in your core that it makes your heart burn. Because the clips are of Sukuna and Lana, together. Swinging their hands together on the beach, cooking together in the kitchen, and kissing each other on the cheek. 
“I know for a fact now, that the tiny little wishes that I made against my bedroom door have come true. Because I’ve been lucky enough to be blessed with the warmest, most compassionate partner that I could have ever wanted.” 
Which is when you notice it. That in the video, Sukuna has the same little teddy bear tattoo as Lana on his forearm. And that they both have the tattoo for their son. 
Your past and mine are parallel lines Stars all aligned and they intertwined And taught you The way you call me, "Baby" Treat me like a lady All that I can say is All of the girls you loved before (ooh) Made you the one I've fallen for Every dead-end street Led you straight to me Now you're all I need I'm so thankful for All of the girls you loved before But I love you more
“Lana is the love of my life. I’m glad that every shitty thing in my life was just…preparation for me to get to her. Because every shitty betrayal, every crappy headline, every deep rooted hard feeling in my chest, she’s the person who was made to handle it. She’s gentle, she’s warm, and she’s everything I’ve ever wanted. And I’d go down this path a hundred times more if Teddy and Lana were always the ones waiting for me at the end.” Sukuna states. 
“It was a horrible situation. But it’s taught us to appreciate the very best. For me, I finally got to reconcile with my older brother, who go to tell me the real story of what happened to him as a kid. And now, I’ve gotten to rectify one of the most important relationships in my life.” Eren states. 
“I feel really shitty for how things went down, Eren.” Zeke states. 
Eren nods, hiking his knees to his chest, as he rests his chin against his legs. Hange and Levi had invited Zeke over in his little retreat in the house, as they prepared for the case at the end of the week, just to talk things out. Hange and Levi had all but forced Eren to be polite and at least hear him out. 
“I’m sure you’re too young to remember. But, that day at the hospital. They had started the rumors that I was funding drug dealers through money that I had in my back accounts.” Zeke states. 
“Well, what did you actually do with that money? Because I know for a fact that Mom and Dad had actually found money being shoveled out of your savings, Zeke.” 
He frowns. 
“You know my Mom, Eren?”
“What kind of dumbass question is that? We have the same mom, idiot.” 
“No, Eren. My biological mother.” 
“Oh, sorry. Dina, right?” 
“She’s not a good person. And I know that. But, she had reached out to me. Asking for money. She said that she needed the money for hospital bills and all that and that Dad wouldn’t return her calls. And that she feels horrible asking of this, because she knows I’m her son and she should have taken care of me, butcher really, reallyneeded it.” Zeke states. 
“And she…spent it on drugs.” Eren states. 
“Yeah. And Mom and Dad knew that, they believed me when I told them.” 
“They did?” 
“Yeah. But it was my decision to distance myself away from you guys. I wasn’t planning on doing it but…Mom lost a magazine cover, Dad lost a role, and…I knew that this was your dream. That you wanted to make it big and you couldn’t really make it big with me attached to your name.” 
“Zeke. That’s so stupid. I wouldn’t have cared about that. And I don’t care because-” 
“Eren. You don’t care now. There comes a point where everyone reaches this kind of stage. Where thje politics and the shitty tabliods, they make you realize that all of these things are really inconsequential. But at that age, this was all that you wanted. And I’d hate foryou to secretly resent me, resent my shitty decisions, becuase they were the ones that were holding you back.” 
“Zeke…”
“I’m just glad to have you back as my brother now. I know my actions don’t really make it seem that way, but you kind of meant the world to me, man.” 
The camera cuts, to a black screen with text on it, as the movie closes out. 
Eren Jaeger, Lana Price, Connie Springer, and Ryomen Sukuna sued Scott Clarkson and Stone Studios on November 6th. The four of them reached a settlement with the studio, each recieiving twenty-five millions dollars each from the Clarkson Conglomerate. 
Lana Price and Ryomen Sukuna have decided to split their settlement money two ways. Both are dedicating a half to ensure that they can continue to fund and upkeep security costs for their son, Theodore Price. And together, the two of them are donating the other half of their money to sexual assault victims, in hopes to support those who have similar experiences to the two of them. 
Connie Springer has decided to donate all of his settlement money in order to support the establishment of rehab centers in various cities throughout the country. He hopes to create an advocacy network for those who have struggled and hopes to shine a light on the problems that exist in the current, underfunded programs. 
Eren Jaeger, along with his settlement money, has asked Stone Studios for two additional items. First, he has asked for a copy of the original interview that he did for Life in Love, which he plans to return to Y/N L/N, who he claims was the only person who deserved to hear those words in the first place, the first chance he gets. 
Second, Eren Jaeger negotiated with the conglomerate for weeks for the masters to Y/N L/N’s album, The Lucky One. The negotiation was short-lived, but the Scott Conglomerate has promised to return the rights of the music to Y/N L/N. 
And third. Eren Jaeger has decided to donate his settlement money to fund arts programs throughout the Candian Provinces. Eren Jaegers album, Valedictorian, will donate all of the money produced in it’s first calendar year to the same cause. 
“Y/N has dreamed about being a triple threat since she was a kid. But the first time that she ever felt that the dream was real was when, according to her, a group of hippie dippies in her hometown had raised money and petitioned to fund the arts program at her school. Which in turn, helped her realize that this was something that she loved. More so than just something that she wanted to do as a career, but something that was so in tune with who she was as a person, that she wouldn’t be able to stop herself from doing it even if she wanted to. And I’d hate for people to look at me, or at her, and be dissuaded from coming into this industry, no matter how shitty it is. There’s really depth to her art and her work that can’t and wont’ ever be diminished by any of this. Which was the point of all of this anyway.” 
The video switches, this time to different clips of you and Eren. Of the two of you at awards shows togethers, sitting in interviews together laughing, and the nearly thousands of clips that Connie has made of you two together throughout the years. 
Of the two of you in love. 
I still remember the look on your face Lit through the darkness at 1:58 The words that you whispered for just us to know You told me you loved me So why did you go away?
“Make no mistake. Y/N L/N is the love of my life. She’s everything you want in the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and more. She’s compassionate, sensitive, and always been so understanding of me. There’s never been, and going to be, someone in my life that has such a pull on me the way she does. She’s the moon, she’s the only reason that I even push and pull in the way that I do. I wouldn’t be sitting here, in this chair today, telling my truth if she hadn’t been so brave, so truthful as to do it first. And I wouldn’t be sitting here, still wholeheartedly believing in love, even though I lost it, because I know for a fact that it would be a disservice to what we shared to turn myself away from it.” 
I never thought we'd have a last kiss I never imagined we'd end like this Your name, forever the name on my lips So I'll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep And I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe And I'll keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are Hope it's nice where you are
“It’s always that dumb question that people ask. Would you rather love and lose it or not love at all?” 
And I hope the sun shines and it's a beautiful day And something reminds you, you wish you had stayed You can plan for a change in the weather and time But I never planned on you changing your mind
“The correct answer is always to chose love. And it’s an easy question when the person you’re loving is love personified.” Eren finishes. 
You turn over to Eren, teary eyed and the gaping, the burning feeling in your chest so immense that you can’t even fathom the words to say to him. So overwhelmed, so overstimulate from everything that you’ve heard - everything that you’ve felt - that you can barely keep your head on straight. The last song starts playing, which you can tell is entitled Fine Line from the credits line, as the words make the sobs wrack through you fully. 
We'll be a fine line We'll be a fine line We'll be alright We'll be alright We'll be a fine line We'll be a fine line We'll be alright (alright, alright, alright) 
You turn to him, his hands on your shoulders, as he reaches up to brush the tears off of your face. You can still feel yourself hiccuping in his touch, the look in his eyes so pained as he looks into your eyes. 
“I’m really sorry, Y/N. I’m so fucking sorry.” Eren whispers. 
“Eren. You- you fucking idiot. I’m going to kill you.” you whisper back, mustering your best glare as you frown at him. 
“That frown never stops being cute, you know? You have the horror appeal of a stuffed animal.” 
You shove him, in response, glaring at him as the burning in your chest slightly subsides. 
“Stop trying to lighten the mood. I’m ten different levels of mad at you right now.” 
“Okay. I’m going to say something crazy to you, but it’s just an idea, okay? We don’t have to do it if you don’t want to?” 
“What the fuck could be crazier than…oh, I told you that I didn’t care about you because I wanted to protect you? Or, oh, I sued a person who took everything away from me and instead of trying to get more money, I tried to get back the rights to your music. Or oh, THAT STUPID INTERVIEW I DID WAS FUCKING EDITED?” 
“Okay. Maybe it’s a little less crazy than that. But just hear me out okay?” 
“I can basically never hear that phrase the same from you again. The last time I didn’t hear you out, you were sitting on a butt load of fucking information. Like the fact that you took the fall for me when someone threatened my fucking family? Or oh, I was struggling for years on end but never once reached out to you or-” 
“Sweetheart. Just listen to me. Please.” 
You frown, crossing your arms as you look at him. 
“Everyone else is going to be on the press tour for another four days. And there are some people who want to see us….in Seattle.” 
“Seattle? Don’t tell me in some weird twisted way that you're friends with Hyla or something?” 
“Ew, no. Not Hyla. But your wife wistfully looks at the window everyday, wondering when you’re going to come home from war. And no I’m not being dramatic she makes that joke almost every day. And Sukuna said he has some choice words prepared for you that he’s been sitting on for a few years now. And, it’s also Teddy’s sixth birthday. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I’m kind of his favorite. And I know that he would like you too.” 
“You-” 
“It would just be for two days. We don’t have to go if you don’t want to, but the two of them. They really love you. They want to see you and…you have a lot to talk about. With both of them.” 
“Yeah. I-I want to see Lana. And Sukuna, they…. fuck, Eren. they went through so much. You- you went through so much. I’d like to see them and- Eren, I don’t know what to say but-” you respond, the tears warm as they spread down your eyes. 
“Don’t say anything yet. Sit on it for a little. I’ll pack our things, yeah?” he states, voice warm as he smiles at you. 
“Okay.” 
“One last thing, Y/N.” 
“Eren. You’re going to give me a heart attack.” 
He rolls his eyes, as he fishes through his pocket, and places a USB in your hand. You twist it over in your fingers as you look at it and give him a confused look. 
“The interview. Unedited. I-I meant what I said. You-you should be able to hear it. Those words are meant for you and you only.
You turn it over in your hands, preshing it flesh against your hand, as you and Eren step out of the townhouse into the snow and head towards the car for the airport. 
Hand in hand.
--
next part linked here
an: GUYS U CANT SIMP OVER SUKUNA ANYMORE HES A FATHER. LEAVE HIM ALONE I SWEAR TO GOD. that being said sukuna and lana appearances next chapter RAAAA. and as always, someone send me an ask for the valedictorian tracklist I HAVE IT LOCKED AND LOADED
taglist: @k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06  @bsenpai @sweetenertea @mykyoon @violetmatcha  @rebeccawinters @cutiejg @bokutosthings @bookwrmm @mblrrrr @wheredidmycrowngo @somethinginyoureyes7 @chilichopsticks @okaystopwhore @you-always-made-me-blush @itzmeme @firelordazulaaaa @whoami-72 @g-ghostly @intimacywithceline @erensmoodygf @cocomellxn @princess-ackerman @jaegerfiles @cacapeepee @rui-0836 @moonmalice @invisible-mori @sofiasber @bbybeeb @timetobegone @tee4str @ttokki2 @leave-rae-alone @ec3lipsy @officialsimpp @gojojang @yookayyo @lordbugs @multiplefandomthings @iobeyfandoms @camilo-uwu @justanotherkpopstanlol @mel-star636 @fvckingeetar @ttalgi @najaemism @ilovekimchi123 @youraggedybitch @xoyumiqls @leafguitar @mrksnctzen @spiidergirlsworld @luvs4kim @levin4nami @florichun @hoonmyluv
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supernovafics · 5 months
Text
𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄
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"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist
pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 3.2k words
warnings: explicit language, some mentions of alcohol, parent drama (both reader’s and steve’s parents suck)
summary: in which your parents and steve’s come over for dinner 
author's note: this has absolutely nothing to do with the harry styles song but the title of it is just very fitting so yeah<33 i’ve been rewatching a lot of gilmore girls this fall season so i feel like that's helped me get the hang of writing awkward/tense dinners with family lol so this needed to be done
general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Fall 1985
When your and Steve’s parents first suggested this “early Thanksgiving dinner,” you thought that it wouldn’t actually happen. 
The initial idea sounded pretty funny to you— your parents and Steve’s parents would have a full on dinner at your apartment a week before the actual holiday. Yeah, right.
It sounded like the kind of idea that parents that really cared about spending time with their children would have, and that wasn’t how you’d necessarily describe yours or Steve’s. 
A month ago, when they told you about the ski trip the four of them were going on during the entire week of Thanksgiving, you expected to just not see them probably until Christmas— and that felt like a bit of relief to you because spending time with your parents wasn’t your favorite hobby.  
But then you remembered how, only during the holidays, your parents always had a need to show, or maybe more so “prove” to themselves, that they actually cared about you. So, of course, they wouldn’t let this stupid holiday go, and instead they thought that it would be best if you all did something early and together. 
And sadly, none of the immediate excuses that you and Steve came up with worked because your moms had solutions for everything.
When you told yours that the kitchen in the apartment was too small to cook for this kind of elaborate dinner, she simply told you that they’d buy and bring all of the food and you and Steve wouldn’t have to cook at all. She also not-so-jokingly mentioned that she would’ve never trusted either of you two cooking anyway.
And when Steve told his mom that the current dining table you two had was way too small to fit all six of you, she promptly had one ordered and delivered to your door in just a week. It was an expensive dark wood set that could comfortably fit six people, and you and Steve spent hours struggling to build it the day it showed up at your front door. It took up an obscene amount of space, but it did actually look kind of nice.
Now it was weeks later and the dreaded night was finally here, but you still tried to come up with any way to avoid it from happening. 
“And we’re sure that we really can’t get out of doing this tonight?” You asked Steve as you folded the blanket that was lying half-hazardly on the couch. “I could call my mom and say that we’ve somehow fallen tragically ill in the last hour?”
“I’m ninety-five percent sure that they’re all already on their way.”
“Shit.”
“It’ll be fine,” Steve said, and then he considered his words. “Actually, it will probably suck, but overall, we will be fine.” 
You let out a sigh and placed the now folded blanket back on the couch and then started cleaning off the coffee table, stacking the random magazines in a neat pile and then adjusting Harold’s cage so that it was nicely in the center. Your and Steve’s shared pet hamster was currently nibbling on the food that you had put in his bowl only moments ago. 
An abrupt feeling of worry shot through you as you looked around the apartment. The place was clean— probably the cleanest it had ever been— since you and Steve had spent the day doing everything to avoid either of your parents saying anything bad about the place. However, in the grand scheme of things, you knew that it didn’t matter because they’d still hate the apartment. They would hate how you two decided to furnish and decorate it, and they would passive aggressively make fun of the place for however long this dinner would have to be.
“Let’s try not to think about how bad this night is gonna be and just be glad that we’re not gonna have to suffer alone, like usual,” Steve said, practically reading your mind and the look on your face, as he started setting plates out on the new table. 
He was completely right. This was the first time that a collective Thanksgiving was happening among all of you. Usually, it was just you alone with your parents in Chicago visiting family members that you never talked to, and Steve was doing the same exact thing except he was in Indianapolis. You’d always end up calling each other at the end of the night from the hotel or family house you were staying at, and you’d tell each other stories about whatever weird family members you encountered or how boring it all was. 
It did make things feel a bit better that, for once, you didn’t have to go through this alone and neither did Steve.
“You’re right,” You said with a nod and then smiled. “We’ll be going through this shitshow together.”
As if on cue, there was a knock at the door and since Steve was closer he went to answer it. You took one brief and final look around the apartment before heading toward the door too, so Steve didn’t have to be by himself in this greeting.
“Hi,” He said when he opened the door and saw all of your parents standing there. There was a bright smile on his face and he effortlessly turned on that “Steve Harrington charm” that people had adored in high school— you hadn’t even gone to the same high school as him, but you still heard so many of the stories.
A chorus of Hi’s and Hello’s were heard as your moms entered the apartment first since they were carrying all of the food and your dads followed in right behind them.
“I still hate that you moved into a place that doesn’t have a front doorman, or, at least, a buzzer system,” Were your dad’s first words to you; deciding against saying the simple “How are you?” that you had expected. “You two should get a better lock on your door.”
You laughed a bit. “We live in Hawkins, not New York, Dad. I don’t think anyone is really itching to rob us anytime soon.” 
“Anything can happen,” He responded, looking at you seriously. “I’ll bring you a new one when we get back from Colorado.”
You only nodded at his words instead of saying anything to rebut them; you knew that he overall meant well. “Okay.”
Your attention turned to your mom and she pulled you into a hug that felt way too forced before pulling away and giving you a quick onceover. “Oh… Is that what you’re wearing?”
You thought that your outfit was fine; a V-neck navy blue knit sweater that was a bit cropped and a simple pair of black jeans. But, your mom always managed to find something wrong with everything, so this reaction to your current outfit didn’t necessarily surprise you; it did still annoy you all the same, though.
“Oh, um, no I was just about to change,” You told her and forced a small smile.
She nodded at that. “Okay, that’s good, that’s good. You go change while Christine and I get the table set up.”
You started heading toward your room but looked back at Steve first. He was in a conversation with his parents that looked like they were doing much more of the talking than him. As if sensing your gaze on him, his eyes met yours and he gave you a hopeful look and that was enough to make you feel a little better.
It didn’t take long for you to change. You kept your sweater on but traded your jeans for the long black silk skirt that your mom had always liked on you. You hoped this slightly different outfit would be enough to satisfy her, and if not, you were willing to suffer through her inevitable look of disappointment. 
You lingered in your room, tidying up your desk for no particular reason and then deciding to remake your bed. It was clear that you were stalling, avoiding having to face your parents again, and as much as you wanted to continue doing that, you also didn’t want to leave Steve to fend for himself. You were supposed to be suffering together, after all. 
You immediately noticed the dining table when you walked out of your bedroom. The food was now nicely set out and there were even brown placemats sitting underneath the plates that Steve had already set out. It was all set up in a way that would’ve felt nice and wholesome if either of your families had ever remotely felt like the ones portrayed in most TV shows or movies. But, they weren’t anywhere close to being like that, so this all just felt weirdly forced.
Of course, you didn’t say that, though.
Instead, you sat down with everyone at the table and desperately hoped that the next few hours of your life would breeze by. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“From the brochure, the pictures of the cabin look really great. We hope it actually looks that way in person,” Steve’s mom, Christine, said. 
You took another bite of the mac and cheese on your plate as you continued to listen to your parents talk about their ski trip that was happening next week, which they had been doing for the last twenty minutes and you fully didn’t mind it. Since the conversation wasn’t centered on either you or Steve, things actually didn’t feel tense or nervewracking. If you could just make your parents talk about themselves during the entire dinner, you would probably end the night with a smile on your face. 
“Oh, and there are a lot of bedrooms too,” Your mom chimed in before taking another sip from the wine glass in her hand. “Maybe you two could take a trip up there soon and invite your friends to go too.” 
“Yeah, that would be nice,” You said with a small nod.
“Enough talking about the trip, though, that’s probably so boring for your kids to hear about,” Your dad said, and you internally sighed because you knew the exact direction the conversation was about to go in. You felt him look at you. “How’s school been going? The semester is almost over.”
“It’s been good,” You answered, keeping your response short and sweet. You decided not to mention that you really couldn’t care less about the majority of your classes because none of what you were doing in any of them felt like it really mattered. 
“Okay, and your grades and everything are fine, right?”
You only nodded in response to his question, hoping that your lack of actual words would signal to him that you wanted to bring an end to this topic of conversation. Of course, that was only wishful thinking.
“That’s good,” Your mom said. “You have to make sure your grades stay like how they were in high school, or even better, for when you transfer to the University of Chicago. We don’t want to have any reason for them not to accept you again.” 
You suddenly felt like you were right back in middle school and high school, where your conversations with your parents solely revolved around school; what your grades were, if you were doing your homework and completing assignments on time, and studying for tests. It always annoyed you that the only times they would bother to pay attention to you was when it came to that stuff. Other than that, you were always seemingly an afterthought, never a bigger priority than their jobs. 
In a way, this entire conversation should’ve been expected; it was always inevitable. Pretty much anytime you talked to your parents in recent months, the discussion always seemed to circle its way back to that school and you going there in two years instead of right now, like they had wanted you to.
“I’m still so surprised that you decided to not go to the University of Chicago now,” Christine said and you turned your attention to her. It was starting to feel a bit painful to you that the subject still hadn’t changed yet. “When Steve told me that you were going to go to the community college close by, I couldn’t believe it, honestly.”
You noticed your parents share a look upon hearing her words. The mix of disappointment and annoyance toward you that was shared between them in that moment felt palpable. 
“I didn’t think it was time to leave Indiana just yet. I’ll be going soon, though,” You said, keeping your voice light and plastering on a fake smile, even though all you wanted to do in that moment was leave the table and hideout in your bathroom for the rest of the night. 
You saw your dad smile a little and then you also noticed the look of relief wash over your mom’s face. For some stupid reason, you still felt the need to make them feel pleased with you. And somehow that made you feel even more upset with yourself than anything they had said to you so far tonight. 
The only thing that managed to make things feel remotely tolerable right then was Steve sitting across from you, giving you a look that said, “Everything will be okay.” For the time being, you chose to believe him and you simply took another bite of your food. 
You were about to say something about how good the turkey was so your moms would start talking about the restaurant they got all of the food from and why they chose it— you were sure that there was some story behind it all— and that would finally bring an end to the college conversation. But, before a word could leave your mouth, Steve’s dad began speaking. 
“Well, at least, you’re in college. We can’t say the same for Steve here.” He then looked at his son. “Do you really want to work at a video store for the rest of your life?”
 Christine let out a sigh. “Jeff.”
“What?” He shrugged as if his previous question wasn’t completely condescending. “I’m just asking a question.”
“I’m actually starting at the community college next semester,” Steve told his parents and you tried to hide your immediate confusion. “I found out I got in a few days ago.”
“Well, that’s great,” Christine said happily, and Jeff smiled approvingly as well. 
You had no idea Steve had gotten in or even applied, and you wondered if he was lying right then to just get his parents off his back, but you couldn’t tell. Something about the way he said it honestly felt pretty real. The only part that didn’t feel real was that you were finding out during this dumb dinner instead of at any other time. 
“So, I was wondering,” Your mom began and you braced yourself for the impact of whatever she was going to say. “Why did you two decide to get a hamster? I feel like it makes things smell a bit funny in here…”
A part of you was glad that the conversation finally shifted away from college. But you didn’t think that the passive aggressive comments toward the apartment would begin with Harold. 
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
“Well, this night was fucking brutal.”
You let out a sigh. “You took the words right out of my mouth.”
Steve was doing the dishes as you put what was left of the food into tupperwares and then put them in the fridge. Surprisingly, it was a lot of stuff leftover; your moms definitely went overboard with the amount they had ordered. You and Steve already made plans to invite Robin and Eddie over tomorrow to have some of these leftovers.
“I’m actually glad that the dessert tasted bad since it made them want to leave early.”
“It was honestly a bit bittersweet because I was kind of excited for that pie,” You said as you placed the final tupperware of food into the fridge and then went over to Steve. “Oh, and also,” You punched his arm and ignored his immediate “ouch.” “Why the hell didn’t you tell me that the stars have finally managed to align and we’ll finally be going to the same school for the first time ever?”
He smiled a little at your dramatics. “I didn’t wanna make a big deal out of it just in case I somehow didn’t end up getting in. I swear I was gonna tell you tomorrow.”
“So, you did all of that annoying application stuff by yourself?”
“Robin helped me with it.”
“I would’ve been happy to help you,” You told him, and maybe you were being a bit overdramatic, but you actually felt slightly offended that he hadn’t wanted to come to you about this. 
The possibility of you two going to the same middle or high school was a far out idea that never happened because you lived in different towns. But, it was still something that was adamantly and wistfully talked about by you and him; how much more fun both of your school lives could be if they intersected in that way like the other parts of your lives did. 
Of course, going to the same college would’ve been the most obvious way for it to finally happen, but Steve never seemed that interested in going to college, and up until the last possible second you were being pushed toward Chicago by your parents. 
But now things were finally different.
“I know that you would’ve, but I didn’t want to talk about it to anyone, honestly. Robin saw me working on the application one day and decided to help,” He explained and you only gave him a small nod in response. “I didn’t even think I’d tell my parents about it, but when I heard my dad’s dumb comment about Family Video I felt like I had to say it so he wouldn’t keep looking at me like a disappointment.” He sighed. “And it’s kinda fucked up… I really don’t wanna care what my parents think about me and what I’m doing with my life, but I think there will always be a part of me that does.”
You thought back to your dad’s approving smile and your mom’s relieved look when you reassured them that you still planned to go to the University of Chicago; how much you still wanted to make them feel at least a little proud of you even though you knew you shouldn’t.
“Me too,” You said softly. 
“I’m glad we probably won’t have to see them again until Christmas.”
You sighed. “Apparently, my dad is gonna bring us a new lock for the door when they get back from their trip.”
“Oh,” Steve said and then smiled at you when it looked like he thought of something. “Okay, what are the odds that he’ll just send someone to put the new lock on the door instead of coming himself?”
You thought about it for a second. “Honestly, I’d say there’s a pretty good chance that would happen. He’ll probably be too busy with work after the trip to actually come and do it himself.”
“Okay, let’s hope for that,” He said as he finished washing the last plate and placed it on the drying rack. “So, since the dessert was a bust tonight, do you wanna go to the diner? I’m sure Mary would never fuck up her apple pie. And then when we get back, we can finish that bottle of wine that our moms left.”
You smiled at his suggestion. “You have a brilliant mind, Harrington.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know ur thoughts<333
(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)
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eveningepiphany · 9 months
Text
welcome to the final show | H.S, part 2
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the girlies asked so I deliver!
read part one here, or check out my masterlist!
summary: after the accidental cafe run in, harry and y/n have wound up with each others numbers. and are quick to go from casual texting to organising another time to meet up. including a cafe trip and an unexpected ice creamery visit.
warnings: fluff, swearing, minor mentions of alcohol, nothing too heavy, just our lovely italyrry who is the sweetest ever.
a/n: thank you all so so much for the incredible amount of support on the first part of this official series. and also for your patience in waiting for me to hurry up and post an update. i know it’s been like 2 weeks since the first part, but I really wanted to give you something i took my time working on <3
———
There’s a certain type of disbelief that comes around once and a while. It’s rare.
It’s the kind that you feel straight to your core. That randomly dumps on you during the day like a bucket of water, and leaves your head spinning like that very bucket came crashing down with it.
It happens in a single moment, but lingers for a long time after the fact.
That’s exactly how you felt after harry texted you first. Because not even a few hours later after you’d exchanged numbers, he sent you through, not only a message, but a photo of all things.
One that made your heart swell with its endearing qualities.
A photo of a plate, filled with the food you’d told him earlier that day was one of your favourites.
Sent with a further little message below it,
Your favourite is currently up for grabs at the family gathering. H
The way he’d signed his intial off at the bottom had you nearly throw your phone across the room at how adorable it was.
Like as if you didn’t even know who you were texting.
Again it strewn your thought— is he aware the kind of mental effect this is having on you? Because you’re borderline going to need to phone for an ambulance.
You’re a simple person. A fangirl, to say the least. This shit, despite being able to say ‘I’ve met and talked with Harry Styles for more than 10 minutes’ does not just disappear.
And you had promised yourself not to tell anyone that this had happened— or was happening? Because there would be nothing worse than this somehow ending up online.
And not to treat him like a flighty deer instead of a grown man, but you would hate for that to place a kind of distrust in his hands.
However, all of that self-agreement doesn’t take away the nagging voice in your head that just wants to tell at the very least your immediate friends and family.
But you’re proud to say— after a long 2 minutes of pacing around your hotel room— you manage to craft a reply back.
Well, only after a few rough and undeniably embarrassing drafts that quickly get deleted out of the text bar.
You’re back to sitting on the floor against the bed frame, facing the window looking out on the gorgeous colours of the evening Italian sky.
Heart pounding, and you’re sure this scene from a third person perspective would look like it was pulled from a hallmark movie.
Girl fawning over man’s simple text. Kicking her feet in the glow of Italian sun, with a glass of wine on the floor next to her.
You stared at your finalised message and decided if you didn’t send it now, you would spiral into a never ending pit of doubt. And just end up overthinking the whole thing.
So you just did it. And now on the screen, under his blue message, was your own grey one.
there’s no way. it looks so good! im gonna see if it’s on my room service menu tbh. consider me inspired.
You bit your knuckles. Acting up like a fucking teenager. Waiting for the shock to subside before you actually get up to find the hotel menu.
After you replied back, you were sweating, honestly. Anxious at the fact you had just sent a text to Harry Styles. And unlike a conversation, that shit is permanent. So too bad if it comes off embarrassing.
Which of course, it didn’t on his end. Unbeknownst to you, he almost physically gleamed at sight of your name on his screen for the first time.
You’d nearly dropped your glass of wine when your phone vibrated up on the counter of the hotels kitchen where it was charging.
It’d been about half an hour from when you replied, you’d since ordered room service and sat in your bed to watch tv.
You made sure to place your glass elsewhere as you ran over to grab your phone.
If it wasn’t already all gone I’d save you some. Any luck with the room service?
You’d replied back swiftly, disregarding any kind of waiting to text back rule. You were all too eager to wait.
i managed to score some up from the room service. didn’t look as appetising as yours, but it was still enjoyed. x
And at this, he smiled, looking at the Italian sunset as he thought of you with a curiosity he recognised as all too unhealthy.
———
If you had told yourself two days ago in that cafe, that you have had several full conversations with harry after getting his number… you probably would have laughed.
Yet its not a joke of any kind. You can pinch yourself over and over again looking at those texts, but all you’ll end up with is a bruise and they will be just as real.
But as you read over the most recently received one, pinching would have not been enough of a reality check.
Maybe a frying pan? Probably would do the trick.
You scanned over his words, rubbing your eyes like you were tired and seeing shit— even though you’d been awake since 9am, which was 2 hours ago.
Unless you have plans, I’m going to try this cafe a friend recommended me a while back, if you wanted to tag along?
[ 1 attachment link]
And there’s simply no way that this is happening? But after 30 seconds without a follow up text telling you he’s accidentally sent this to the wrong person, you sit up straight.
Well, you’re not about to ask him if he’s serious right now, so you channel every fibre of casualness left within you and use it to construct a response.
id love to! I’ll get ready to go soon if you want to meet there before 12:30?
That works perfectly. did you need a lift, or are you in walking distance. I can pick you up if you need.
You almost keel over at his offer, and the absolute gentleman move he just made.
You also realise you didn’t even look where the cafe was. Because if Harry Styles asks you to go somewhere with him the answer should always be yes. Figure out the means of getting there and back later.
Either way you open the link and get taken to google maps, and the cafe in question is literally a 10 minute walk away from you.
im in walking distance, it’s about 10 minutes away. so I’ll just make my way there at about 12:15! thank you for the lovely offer though.
And you move as quickly as possible from your bed to your suitcase, ready to tear that thing apart for an outfit.
You don’t want to be over the top, but you have to go with something on the shorter side because it’s already in the high 20’s and it’s not even afternoon yet. So you lug out the many summer dresses you crammed in there, hoping that one of them will strike your interest.
Some get tossed back into your bag as you filter through them, not making the cut for a variety of reasons— like showing too much of your cleavage.
Yea, a good few of them get ruled out for that reason.
But eventually— and thank god, because you were starting to loose hope— you find one that is perfect for the occasion. It’s all types of flowy and comfortable, but still maintains the pretty connotation that summer dresses are known for.
Before putting it on, you go into the bathroom and do your morning routine— fixing your hair as a final step, but deciding to leave it out since there is hardly any wind outside to make it a mess. Plus it will suit the dress.
You somehow managed to take long enough that the next time you look at your phone you realise it’s nearing 12:15pm a lot faster than you expected. So you hustle to get the rest of your shit together, and make your way out the door.
The walk there is as peaceful as you could imagine, just the sounds of chatter from passer-by’s and birds lingering in trees dotting the sidewalk.
But on the inside you are still panicking. The last time you’d meet him in a cafe was a total surprise. This time it’s planned, and that leaves too much room for your brain to overthink it.
As you finally push through the doors of the cafe you had found your way to, a tiny bell above jingles. But you’re hardly focused on it as you look to the front counter.
Seeing the exact person you were here for already grabbing two drinks from a barista at what you can only assume is a pickup counter.
As he spins around, he catches your momentary surprise, complimented by flushed cheeks. To this he smiles and nods you over with his head.
He looked excited to see you. Like a longtime pair of friends meeting up again after a while apart.
Your feet kick back into gear at his nod, following him over to a table that’s tucked into the corner. He had his pleasing bag slung across the top of the chair.
“Hi lovely,” he says the minute you’re close enough to hear his deep voice.
“Hi Harry.” You smile, heart still beating too fast. The words feeling different as they get spoken from your mouth.
He walks the few steps around the table, closing the gap still between you— and he doesn’t wait for you to hug him, he just pulls you straight into the warmth of his arms.
Wrapping you up in a way that you can smell the cologne lingering on the dip of his neck into his shoulder.
His accent is muffled by your hair as he talks gently, “how’ve you been?”
The common question has your head reeling. In its simplicity is still sweetness.
You pull back, his eyes training on yours, looking keenly at you, awaiting an answer from your almost shy lips.
“I— yes, I’ve been really good thank you.” You nod, how could you not be? Look where your standing, who you’re standing with.
“What about you…?” You ask, watching as the corners of his pink mouth upturn.
He’s freshly shaven, you notice, and your fingers twitch with the need to glide over the smooth skin of his cheek.
You resist as he answers, still relatively closer than you should be out in a public place.
“I’m doing well, even better now.” He raises his eyebrows, a cheeky grin coming on his face.
He revels in blood that rushes into your cheeks, reddening them up like you’ve just run a mile.
“Oh, stop it. You’re a bloody flirt.” You roll your eyes in an attempt to play it off, and you also take a step back to seat yourself in the chair at the table he’d picked.
Maybe he was a flirt at most times. But from his perspective, with you in a dress like that? Not to sound like he’s drawing on the one direction lyrics, but as if you don’t know you’re beautiful.
I mean, sure, he thinks you’re aware that you’re pretty. But in the way it’s working him up, you seem to be clueless.
Because he’s almost stumbling on his words at the sight of you, soft fabric flowing seamlessly over your tan skin, cutting off above your knees leaving him with thoughts that he should not be having in a public space.
But at the same time, he tries to convince himself it’s nothing but a wholesome coincidental friendship. Even though if at any point tabloids get a hold of this, it will be very very far from that.
You’re watching as he looks a little caught up in thought, and you chuckle at it.
The sweet noise breaks him out of it, and he’s grateful for that. It was a rabbit hole he was happy to just not go down right now.
“Can’t help it,” he shrugs, going over to his own seat.
“Now, i need the full story of what happened with your friends luggage at the Singapore airport?”
You let out a laugh, a little surprised he even remembers to bring it up. You had been texting about travel, and told him the time your friend had her luggage lost in a layover between Singapore and London last month.
“I mean, where did it leave it off?” You had explained a partial amount of the story. But told him, if you’d planned another cafe trip it would be a lot easier to explain the ins and outs.
And he was overly excited to watch you tell the tale. Watch the way your hands moved as you animatedly told the story, and the way your eyes get a little lost in thought.
He caught tiny glimpses of it the first time you’d met, but he craved to watch it happen in full. Among other things.
You told him how you’d had 12 hour layover, but that you guys didn’t want to book a hotel since they were so expensive. But you were still meant to collect your luggage— and everyone else but your friend Bonnie got it back.
“She’s Scottish, crazy red hair and she is like a fire cracker. She was actually at the last show, in the front with us, but anyway— so she’s running around Singapore airport accosting all the staff with her stressed out and angry Scottish accent.”
You went back and forth with the many fuck arounds of that day, how you went from halfway across the airport to a misplaced baggage unit per a staffs advice, only for the lady at the front desk to say it wasn’t there— and to go back to the support centre.
“It was not funny at the time,” you said, “but fuck, looking back now it’s pretty good. And it makes a fun story to tell.”
“So where did she actually get her stuff back?” He asks, frowning with a curious smile.
“Oh, like 6 hours after we originally got off the plan. They’d told us to wait up at that little customer support place and after like another hour and a half, some really frazzled guy came running up with it.”
And you laughed at the image in your head, sweaty and looked terrified he’d gotten the wrong bag, “We asked where it had gotten lost, but he just asked if it was certainly ours, then when we said yes he nodded and practically ran the other way.”
Harry was smiling so hard his cheeks hurt.
“God, is that quite a story.”
“See why I said texting it would have been way too hard.” You amend, reaching for the deserted cup of tea you hadn’t even drank out of yet, taking a sip.
Exactly how you like it, and you smile. Watching him watch you drink it.
“Just how you like it, yea?” He asks to confirm. But also lost a little in the way the liquid seamlessly travels from the cup down your throat.
“Yea, perfect.” You nod, clutching the warm cup between your hands, tongue swiping out over your lips.
“Anyways, what about your own crazy travel stories. Since you’ve done plenty of it.” You prompt, unaware of his remaining gaze.
The afternoon went of just like that. Telling stories and sharing funny little anecdotes that had you laughing so hard that tears were about to spill from your waterline.
You slowly forget that it’s Harry Styles you’re sitting with. And of course that sounds weird. But it’s like there came a certain point in the afternoon where he just became simply Harry.
Nothing more, nothing less.
It had been a rather long time you sat in that same cafe with him. So much that the chairs, originally very comfortable, had started to become the opposite as time flew on.
“Are these chairs starting to hurt your ass too?” He asks, humour lacing his tone as he watches you adjust yourself in the chair for the third time in the last 10 minutes.
“Yea, the metal seats are lowkey not it.” At this he laughs, the way you word things somehow being more entertaining than most.
“Well, cmon, I already paid, we can go for a walk if you want?” He rises from his place, and you’ve never stood up quicker.
“Braving the Italian sun at its very brightest are we?” You joke, smiling as he grabs his bag and slings it over one of his broad shoulders.
“Could be a big regret, could also be very scenic.” He says as you grab both your empty cups.
“I forgot to put sunscreen on as well, so might have a different colour forehead to the rest of my body but… oh well.” he shurgs, following you over to the small bin by the cafe door.
You’re immediately thinking of the time he went to a show after going out golfing and he had a sunburnt head.
“Wouldn’t be the first time.” And it takes you by surprise that the teasing words made it out of your mouth.
Yet, he seems happily indifferent to it, like it’s of course something you’d know, “Whatever you.”
Your laughing at his response as you hold the door open for him, exiting the cafe into the heat.
A tortured sigh is let out of you both at the swelter of it. The concrete pavement doing nothing but intensify it.
“I underestimate the weather every day here, I’m wearing too many layers of clothing to be dealing with this.”
“Take your hoodie off you dolt.”
He usually keeps layers on so that his tattoos are less visible. Since they’re often a dead giveaway of who he is. So his hands hesitates as they slip to the hem of his jumper.
“Don’t tell me you went out with just a jumper on, no other layers. In Italy?” You shake your head, still smiling as you slowly walk into the shaded part of the sidewalk.
“No— I did.” He laughs, “just m’tattoos usually garner some attention.”
He clarifies, “that sounded really egotistical, not the tattoos themselves, I meant people recognise me easier when they’re out.”
“Oh!” You stumble a little in your thought process. Feeling a little silly for not realising.
“I kind of like… forgot?” You say, coming to a stop as he eventually succumbs to the heat and peels the jumper over his head. Folding it up and popping it into his bag, glancing at you with a tiny breathe of relief at his new found ventilation. Hands moving to tousle with his hair in attempt to flatten it after pulling the jumper over it.
“I mean, i did. too honestly.” He agrees, continuing to walk forward.
You read into that a million different ways. But he makes sure you don’t get confused, “Y/N, don’t look so worried. I just mean you’re a very easy person to get… i dunno, lost in.”
Oh okay? How does one just casually continue putting one foot in front of the other after someone says something like that?
“You flatter me too much.” You roll your eyes, still as awful as ever at masking your shock or adoration for something someone’s said.
“Cmon, you’re just too humble i think.” He bumps you with his shoulder.
You’re laughing at him. But stop dead in your tracks as you stop something across the road.
“H.” You say, and he also comes to a halt. Taking a moment to process your use of his nickname. Like the way it so gently came from you.
Yet you sound almost dire, so he’s looking over where you are, scanning the sunny street for something that could possibly concern you?
For a moment he thinks it may be paparazzi, but this side of town is usually much better in regards to that.
He feels protective of you, “What? Are you okay?”
“There’s ice cream over there.” You say, hand coming up to cover your mouth a little.
A breath of relief fills his lungs, “i— you made it out like this was a life or death situation about t’unfold.”
Your expression turns to a grin, “no, i just love Italian ice creameries!”
“Can we please go and get some?” You glance back to him, and his own smile widens at your face. Gleaming with this unfiltered excitement over something so simplistic.
“Of course we can.” And you’re immediately grabbing his wrist to tug him across the road towards the shop.
“As if I could say no to you, anyway.” He laughs as he keeps up with your quick pace, clearly on a mission.
Once inside the store, with its pink and mint coloured walls and decor, you move to look at the collection of flavours.
The staples such as vanilla and strawberry, but then a small selection of more slightly diverse ones, like peanut butter brownie or salted caramel.
Their cookie dough ice cream looks amazing though, filled with chocolatey chunks of cookie. So you decide relatively fast that’s what you want.
And then you turn to Harry, whose eyes are still darting between flavours indecisively.
“What one do you want?” You ask, and he adverts his eyes to you.
“No I’ll order.” He shakes his head.
“No-no. Let me get this for you, please.” He goes to protest and you nudge him with your elbow, “don’t be stubborn. I want to get you something.”
“I— fine. But know you’re just as pushy as i am.” He scoffs with a laugh.
“I’ll get… maybe chocolate?” He points to it, and you nod.
The older lady at the counter is overly lovely, and you’re rattling off your order to her with a beaming smile.
Harry watches your interaction with her, and how you take a moment to compliment the heart covered apron she was wearing.
His heart trips over it’s own rhythm at the sight.
You pays and he still feels a little guilty, but figures he can make it up to you next time they go out by getting you a cookie or two with your tea.
You come back to his side with the two cones, stacked two scoops tall, and hand one to him.
“Thank you, you didn’t have to though.”
“It’s fine, Harry. Do you wanna find somewhere outside to sit?” You ask, turning to wave at the lady who served you as your slowly exiting the shop.
“Sure, i saw that little bench under a tree a couple shops down near that park.” He nods, taking his turn to lead the way there.
You shortly find the way there, sitting yourselves down on it, looking out onto a small playground with some kids swinging on monkey bars and sliding down the slide.
“Italian ice cream will forever be the best kind of ice cream.” You sigh out with pleasure, licking over the cool scoop.
He unwittingly is blushing at the sight, suddenly batting away mental images at the sight of your pink tongue jutting out of your mouth.
Shaking his head, he pushes them aside. “Definitely. You can tell it’s handmade.”
He busies his own tongue on his own ice cream, only stealing occasional glances to you at his side.
But he can’t help but tilt his cone to you, “Wanna try the chocolate?”
His offer comes as the equivalent of a brick to the head, but you’re invested in making yourself not seem psychotic.
So you nod nonchalantly, “i will, but I have a feeling that’s just because you want some of mine.”
“Mm, maybe I do a little.” He agrees, but any other coherent thought dies where it was in his head at you leaning over to his own cone. Your tongue running over the ice cream, collecting up its sweet residue.
You nod, “That’s so good.” Acting like you’ve got a normal internal monologue right now. Even though she’s hurling things at you that you can’t all process in such a short flash of time.
You just put your mouth where his has been! He is about to do the same thing! His eyes look a little blown out! What the fuck!
Pretty much what it sounds like up there, along with some alarm bells and screaming.
However you just gesture your cone to him, taking mental images of him mirroring what you did just before.
He hums a sound of enjoyment as he pulls back, glancing up at you, pinning you with his green gaze. “Good choice.”
You agree with a slight mumble, shaking your head momentarily to clear your thoughts. Ready to change the subject so you can internally recollect yourself.
“I only regret sitting out here since it’s melting so fucking fast.”
“I know,” he also settles quickly back into the normality of the moment, “i cant eat it quicker than the rate it’s melting.”
“It’s cold though, which is at least a win.”
Conversation trails on as normal while you finish off the ice cream. Discussing if biting the bottom off an ice cream cone is normal or not.
And before you know it you check your phone when you get a text from your mum, asking what time you’re able to call tonight.
She misses you heaps, you can tell. But despite the timezone difference you are making it work.
You also glance up at the time and realise it’s nearing 4pm. And you have just spent majority of the afternoon with Harry.
You also realise you’d agreed to have dinner with all of your friends in one of their hotel rooms tonight.
“Seems like it’s my turn to have to be the one to bail.” You say, popping your phone in your back pocket and looking back at Harry.
“That’s okay, love, what’s the plans for the evening.”
You explain that you’ll go over the the girls hotel room and probably just eat pizza, and then go back to your own room and call your mum for a bit.
He feels a little sad you even have to leave, which is odd, but he nods anyway, “That sounds fun. Solid plan.”
You reluctantly rise from your seat next to him. “So…” you take a tiny breath in, “am I the one picking the next cafe we go to?”
He beams internally at the fact you’re also trying to plan the next time you’re able to meet up with each other.
“I reckon so, Angel.” He stands as well, “I’m good for any day.”
Any plans he has can be rearranged for you.
“Alright!” You feel better immediately knowing you can see him again soon.
“Thanks for the ice cream too, by the way.” He says, walking back over to the pathway with you.
“It’s okay.” You smile, nervously being the one to give him a goodbye hug. A small flutter erupts in your stomach as his hands pull you flush to him around your lower back.
“I’ll see you soon, mkay?”
“Yea. Ill talk to you later.” You remind yourself that he’s easily accessible to talk to. You literally have his number.
“Bye H.” You give him a squeeze, pulling away with a smile, “Bye Y/N.” And you wave as you start the walk back to your hotel. Plenty of things to think about.
———
“Did you guys see the supposed pics of harry today on harryflorals? He was hanging out with someone apparently!” Nina asks everyone.
Only two of you hadn’t, including yourself.
She passes the phone first to you, and you frown.
“I know, looks like it’s taken on a potato.” She says, assuming your furrowed brows are due to the fact the image is really hard to get anything from.
Unless you know that park bench he’s ‘allegedly’ sitting on. And that the blurry figure next to him is almost certainly you— but no one else can tell.
“Yea… shit that is…” You pause, brain freezing a little, “bad quality.”
You hand her phone back. But caption of the post still festering in your head long after the moment is over.
HARRY *SUPPOSEDLY* WITH A GIRL IN ITALY TODAY! but this is the only pic we got 💔
———
ahh and that’s part two! I hope you guys are enjoying this, and I’m so excited to write more about these two. cant wait for you to see what’s in store for them.
thank you again for your patience while waiting for this second part, and to all the lovely people who requested this oneshot to be made into something more.
taglist:
@harrystylesgirlie @purple9950 @teamspideyman @rociolunaa21 @spiritofbuddha @lemonhrry @deamus-liv @lquvlly @kuntxrgraudunkelbunt @hsfanficsrecss
+ all the anons who sent stuff to my submission box, thank you to you guys too, all my love
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agustdiv1ne · 4 months
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in no particular order, here are my favorite fics that i've read this year!! please show a lot of love to all of these wonderful authors <3 (also please heed their rules, esp for nsfw fics!!)
part of my 2023 wrap up!
@koqabear
um like. quite literally everything sol has posted this year. i am being so serious. check out their masterlist right NEOWWWW and read EVERYTHING
@blackhairedjjun
flowers of every color — i could rave about this series for like 10 hours straight, i'm not even kidding. it's sweet with the perfect amount of angst to really draw you in, i fell in love with every character more and more with each chapter <3 now where is my prince!jjunie :(
@tyunkus
amazon wishlist (m) — me when me when me when roommate!tyun offers to fuck me...god, i need this so bad
@jishyucks
gloves & dittany — OHHHHH how i love this fic...one of the best harry potter aus i have ever read, and with yeonjun?? slytherin!yeonjun!!!! ooooo you really got me good, op <3
bittersweet — *cowboy cat meme* DRUNK SOOOOOOOOOB i think this wins the award for being the cutest fic i read in the year of 2023
@beom-pyu
i can't swim, idiot! (m) — i will never not shut up about this fic...just faking married? with beomgyu?? with feelings involved??? yeah. Yeah <3
like the moon — merman!kai you will always be famous to me, one of my all-time favorites by far!!!!!
@toruro
answers (m) — this academic rival!taehyun fic had me screaming crying gnawing on my leg like wtf mika. how could you do this to me. i am dead now.
@hyukalyptus
something nice (m) — i went SOOOO insane over this fic like the dynamics were just. scrumptious. i love yeonkai i love this fic i love hp for writing this yes yes yes
like, never ever? (m) — ohhhh my god. this one really got me good,, dom best friend!beomgyu giving mc her first orgasm?? sign me tf up !!!!!!
@qqtxt
sway with me — i sent this in for their 1k event i just :')))) i love this so so so much!!!! dancing with yeonjun is my dream, so thank you for taking my request op!! <3
@hueareloved / @huenation
my love mine all mine (m) — the most tender and soft and SWEET nsfw fic i have ever read, so in love with this and sleepy lovesick jjunie AGHH brb rereading this
ditto — ohhhh how i love angst. amor's writing style is beautiful and it made this beomgyu fic that much more heart-wrenching <3
@huckleberrykai
laundry basket (m) — no bc this went CRAZYYY with the perv!mc thing, savored every single word of this kai fic tbh
comfy cozy (m) — CUTE AF. i am the biggest proponent of soft smut and berry writes it so well <3 i loveee soft yeonjun more than life itself
@aduh0308 / @banggyu0308
yeehaw (m) — OKAYYY cowboys!taejun fucking destroyed me like. i don't think i ever recovered from this
berry sorbet (m) — i need kai to be my soulmate rn wtf. cute n sweet and i loved it
@boba-beom
airport crush pt.2 (m) — the minute smiles told me she was working on airport crush pt.2 i passed away. nothing could have prepared me for this fic, it destroyed me in the best way...god, i need yeonjun so bad
trapped in your game (m) — i salivated. i quaked. i (s)creamed. best friend!yeonjun, please hmu </3
@napofamoon / @mazeinthemoon
you're the one love (m) — moonie ATE with this fallen angel!yeonjun fic!! i love sacrilege n this was just sooo hot
@tubatwo
workaholic — this made me giggle and kick my feet so hard...i love you cafe boss taehyun, pls marry me
@hyuk4ngel
honeymoon avenue — i. love. angst. and fay is exceptionally talented at writing it!! taehyun better watch out tho >:(
@mapofthemazeinthemirror / @afterbluehours
untitled (m) — this yeonbin x reader fic is SOOOO hot like. i screamed. i cried. i rolled around in a fetal position because it just made me so insane
@nightlyawnzz
duality (m) — OHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYY GODDDDDDD i think this is one of the hottest kai fics i have ever read in my entire life. i don't often see kai as a hard dom in fics so this opened my eyes (can't wait for the final part!!)
@scintillasofbeomgyu
you are in love — one of my jjunie comfort fics!!! sweet n soft and everything to me :')
@petrichor-han
twenty-three suns (m) — rain's writing style hits me straight in the gut, especially with this summer fling au with taehyun :') lovely yet heart-wrenching and AGHH i love this
@ncteez
untitled (m) — UMMM this camboy!yeonjun fic altered the trajectory of my entire life. i fucking die every time i read this, like it has to be laced with crack or something
menace (m) — this was batshit INSANE LIKEEEE gangster!yoongi fucked me up so bad (in the best way)
@yeonboy
never meet your heroes — ONE OF MY FAVS EVER. LIKE. COLLEGE AU WITH SOOBIN???? I AM SO OBSESSED YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND
@ijhyo
how to get the girl — i ate this up SO hard. i just adore both the mc and beomgyu's characters in this, definitely another all-time favorite of mine
@cheolhub
head (m) — SAR YOU WERE INSANE FOR THIS. sub!soobin makes me so feral and this made my brainrot even worse UGHHH
@starbandit
backseat (m) — oh. oh yeah. now this is everything to me, best friend!yeonjun + car sex = a very very happy me
@tonicandjins
learning languages (m) — i don't often read donghyuck fics (or nct fics in general), but this one. oh, this one is beautiful. it made me cry, it made go through so many emotions i just. read this right now, you won't regret it
@heart2beom
cliche — i still vividly remember this first time that i read this, the dialogue is hilarious and it is just sweet n fluffy n AGHH i will forever adore this fic <3
and some more accounts with amazing fics!!!: @majestyjun @hyewka @taegimood @naomiarai @hyuk4sbf @fairyofshampgyu @enha-cafe @moonhoures @wolfytae-exe @dearlyjun @heartchoi @sook9i @tinietaehyun @minastras
a big thank you to all of these writers for sharing your works!! <3
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finelinevogue · 1 year
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Finelinevogue Masterlist ‘23
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get lost in a world where harry styles is the main character in your life.
navigation
Harry Styles:
Fics
Fluff
the midnight game show -
you and harry partake in the midnight gameshow with michael mcintyre
birthday boy -
harry’s birthday party ends up with cake frosting in his hair and your eyes
tears of love -
a whole bunch of tears and a whole bunch of love for the album of the year grammy winner
in this world, it’s just us -
you and harry attend the Brits, drink a little and love each other a lot
valentines day gift -
you purchase a gift for harry like never before
take a break -
you and harry arrive at your nyc hotel for a little getaway
he’s just harry -
a couple of fan interactions with harry on the streets of london
when in rome -
just a few random clips from a holiday to rome
i love you more than dino nuggets -
the night before the final show
love in photos -
a sum up of love on tour in a few instagram posts
ring shopping -
a tiny blurb about engagement ring shopping
spread the love -
harry’s fans LOVE you
firsts -
it’s your first date out with harry
a montage of love -
a fan has put together a small video of some of your best moments together
the eras -
harry is the best boyfriend ever and not just because he has taylor swifts number
Angst
first kiss of the year -
a new year’s eve kiss, with a few tears and tipsy friends
jealous wife -
you can’t help feel jealous when people stare at harry for looking so good
you are the love of my life -
you go to harry’s listening party and are reminded how he is the love of your life
family will get you through -
you go through a life changing operation but you have a strong family to get you through it
parisian love -
you are a little self conscious of your feelings in the city of love
paparazzi nerves -
you get nervous around the paps
lost n found -
you are lost in italy the night before your wedding
life goes on -
just a tiny blurb of post tour engagement talk
love her stupid -
you are jealous of harry’s new bandmate, when you really don’t need to be
AU
kisses on tour -
harry always chooses a fan to kiss at the end of his concert shows and you attend his next tour date
labitule -
you have an obsession with harry’s hoodie collection
starry eyes -
harry’s the captain of the ice-hockey team and there’s a house party to celebrate their win
interesting enough? -
you spy an attractive man at the bar, but you’re too shy to say hello
the best thing -
you hate harry after that one night together, but when you need someone the most he will always be there
Series
love island universe
harry’s house
UNIverse
love on tour blurbs
christmas fic
Other
instagram concepts
fic rec 2023
fic rec masterlist
masterlist ‘21
masterlist ‘22
1K notes · View notes
allwaswell16 · 3 months
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A fic rec of One Direction fics where Louis is a villain of some sort as requested in an ask I can no longer find oof Hope you see this rec whoever asked for it! If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!
- Louis/Harry -
💀 Wanted Most by BornOnABeach
(E, 156k, thief Louis) Louis Tomlinson is a thief, and a damn good one at that. Most have heard of him. Most don't understand him. And Harry Styles is the FBI agent who can never seem to catch him.
💀 Cover Me with Jewels by ShatteredGlassHouse / @larryislove
(E, 55k, thief Louis) the one where Louis is a jewel thief and dating Harry Styles, the heir to a designer jewellery business empire, but Louis worries Harry will discover him, so he disappears for five years. 
💀 Tied Down by HamPalpert
(E, 48k, drug dealer Louis) The most interesting case in Liam and Niall's careers falls directly into their laps, courtesy of an epic fuck-up of one Harry Styles, partner to the almost-infamous drug dealer Louis Tomlinson. 
💀 I'll Throw Away My Faith (Just To Keep You Safe) by @theboyfriendstagram
(E, 42k, assassin Louis) AU. Harry Styles is an MI6 agent on a mission to find out who’s planning on killing the Prime Minister. Louis Tomlinson is a wanted professional assassin, hired by the MI6 to kill whoever wants to kill the Prime Minister.
💀 Please, Deceive Me by Larringiscaring
(E, 42k, thief Louis) Louis robs casino's with his ex-boyfriend, and Harry trusts a criminal a little more than he should
💀 no pressure, no diamonds by @karamelised
(E, 42k, thief Louis) Louis is a thief, Harry a grifter. They are thrown together for a huge diamond heist in Paris, where their past soon catches up to them.
💀 Buried Like Treasure by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird
(E, 40k, thief Louis) Semi-retired thief Louis Tomlinson has been pulled in for one last job: steal a painting from an uninhabited mansion. Neither one of them expects a natural disaster.
💀 The Risen (series) by @creamcoffeelou
(E, 28k, cult au) In search of the next breaking story, Harry goes off to do something no one else has been able to do: get the scoop on Louis Tomlinson and his devoted group of followers.
💀 For You, I Will (I Don't Believe in Magic, but) by theweightofmywords / @lil0
(E, 17k, criminal Louis) Louis leads two lives, when all he wants is a simple one with Harry.
💀 focal point by rainbowsandgucci
(M, 8k, thief Louis) By the time you read this, I’ll be gone, so don’t bother looking. Last night was lovely, Harry, I’m sure you agree. Sorry to run, but that’s just how life works sometimes, I’m sure you understand. Don’t forget about me. xx P.S. Thanks for the money
💀 Daisy by Jennifer_Kaid / @poetsreprieve
(E, 3k, mob au) An assassin who lurks in shadows, who kills with a detachment towards his victims, their death always displayed artfully for anyone who stumbles upon the corpse once his work is done.
💀 Stealing My Trust by Phillipa19
(E, 3k, organized crime) Harry hates the danger Louis' 'job' puts him in, but no one ever said being in love with a criminal would be easy.
💀 we're swimming with the sharks until we drown by velvetnoodle
(T, 3k, thief Louis) There’s only one thing that makes Harry’s job on the casino floor bearable, and that’s a chance to grab the attention of the mysterious man who frequents the establishment often.
💀 How to Catch a Christmas Tree by Anonymous
(E, 2k, omegaverse) It's two days until Christmas and Harry needs a Christmas tree.
💀 Marionette by Anonymous
(E, 2k, witch Louis) Harry is a vampire on the hunt. He doesn’t know that he’s not the top of the food chain.
💀 The shape I've made you into by flamboyo / @riverswater
(M, 1k, established relationship) "Sometimes, I wish you'd hit me."
💀 Twenty-Eight by @beardyboyzx
(M, 1k, spy au) Agent Harry Styles has finally caught his nemesis, but there's a knot in the plot he's not ready to detangle.
- Rare Pairs -
💀 To Catch a Thief by StormDancer
(E, 49k, Zayn/Louis) There are some rules even thieves have trouble breaking. Marriage vows, for instance.
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dramioneasks · 4 months
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Top 10 Most Favourited (Completed) Fics on FFNET of 2023:
Wilted Rose and Muddy Blood: A Dramione Fic by Raptor.Elephant - M, 25 chapters, Words: 34,001 - Lavender Brown makes a bet with Hermione that she can't win over the Slytherin Prince in a month. Hermione wonders why she agreed... she could never stand a chance of winning, right? Rated for minor adult themes and language. R&R. COMPLETE... FINALLY!
The Education of a Lady by thewanderers'wanderingdaughter - M, 34 chapters, Words: 365,605 - COMPLETE. Fourth and final (for real this time) part in the His Little Bird series. The story of survival, betrayal, and tragedy. A monster took everything from her. Now she's expected to be a willing participant in the world he's built for them. They want her to become one of them. She only wants vengeance, and now that she has her power back, she can make that a reality.
If Only by SarahFraser - M, 25 chapters, Words: 99,891 - Fourteen years after Draco and Hermione break up, Draco accompanies his son, Scorpius, to Kings Cross for his first year at Hogwarts. Thirteen-year-old twins, Mila and Milo, get their first in person glimpse of the father that abandoned them before birth. After Mila confronts her father for abandoning them, Draco seeks Hermione out on the platform to find out what the hell is going
I'm a What? He's My What? Well Hell! by clumsydolphin - T, 18 chapters, Words: 34,168 - This is a very unusual Veela tale! I promise if ya peek inside it's a surprise! Now complete!
Blackmailed by Mistress Lynn - M, 14 chapters, Words: 49.867 - Draco finds out something pertaining to the war that Hermione would do anything to prevent from getting out. How far is she willing to go to protect her secret? DM/HG, Draco M./Hermione G. 7th Year Hogwarts, war AU, Dramione, lots of banter! COMPLETE! WINNER: 2022 Top Dramione Fics on Reddit, 2nd Place Dom!Draco (but he's totally a switch here)
Mother: Unknown by HufflepuffMommy - M, 42 chapters, Words: 108,211 - After the battle, Draco Malfoy was given something he never thought he wanted—a daughter. The only problem? He didn't know who the mother of his child was. Six years after the war, Hermione Granger moves to the states, to a small coastal town in Maine. There, she runs into a familiar wizard—along with his outgoing, precious daughter. NOW COMPLETE!
Fireworks by cleotheo - T, 10 chapters, Words: 25,510 - A party at the end of seventh year results in major life changes for Harry Potter and Hermione Granger, including the loss of their best friend, Ron Weasley. Can a reunion several years later fix the rift, or are some things too broken to ever be fixed? Reunion style story.
Old Friends by cleotheo - T, 10 chapters, Words: 25,453 - When Ron Weasley returns to Wizarding Britain after five years away he is dismayed to find his place in life seems to have been usurped by a certain former Slytherin. But how far will Ron go to get back the life, and the witch, he believes should be his?
Teach Me How to Forget by scullymurphy - M, 20 chapters, Words: 110,321 - Hermione Granger is 27 years old when her life falls apart. Cheated-on, flatless, in a dead end job, she decides to change one thing she can-take a class and try for some career advancement. But change is never easy, especially when an old enemy is the catalyst-and the class instructor.
Designations by sbz0702 - M, 35 chapters, Words: 85,293 - In the aftermath of the Battle of Hogwarts and the end of the Wizarding War, all Seventh- and Eighth-Year students are required to return to Hogwarts to complete their magical educations. When they arrive, they discover that the Ministry has been tampering with nature and biology...and they've all been affected... EWE, non-Canon compliant
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We Could Be The Greatest Team.
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(Y/N) JENNER, best known for being on the reality tv show ‘keeping up with the kardashians.’ She’s also known to be the gorgeous fiancé of pop sensation, the one and only Mr. Harry Styles.
With her growing up with five sisters, that made her a very family oriented person, and Harry likes to think that trait is what got him to initially ask her to be his in the first place.
There first proper date took place in 2013, the two of them being only nineteen at the time, they didn’t want everyone getting involved in there relationship because it was there private life, that was until they chose to go to her older sister, Kim’s wedding where the two were pictured together, very very, close.
2017 was a very big year for the two of them. The year they got engaged to each other. Harry got down on one knee in his Italian villa, there first proper house together that they brought, because in his eyes he knew they would spend forever together.
(Y/N) has been there through it all, so there was no doubt he wanted her to be his wife. On the tours, when One Direction went on there hiatus, when his solo album was released and when he won his Grammy’s she was there to hold his hand and would always be able to ground him if he was having a slightly bad day. Never wanting to go to bed without saying those three simple words.
There wedding was supposed to be in the summer of 2020, but so many obstacles got in there way, COVID, stress from cancelled tours and well a baby. A bouncing baby boy who came screaming into the world in September, 2021.
Sonny Harry Robin Styles.
There journey was a love story like no other, and nothing could ever break them apart. They were a team, two peas in a pod, the yin to her yang, the bestest of friends.
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authors note: this isn’t really a series per say, in my opinion it’s more a trope then anything else. when inspiration strikes or i get a certain request, they will get published and tagged here for you all to see:)
if a tag list is something you would like me to set up, let me know <3
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real life:
instagram concepts:
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pleasingsatellite · 1 year
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toxic socialite harry and y/n
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liked by harrystyles, gemmastyles and 352,829 others
yourinstagram in paradise 🌊
view all 2,628 comments
randomperson an angel!
randomperson girl the photoshop is getting out of hand…
↳yourinstagram all natural babe 😚
harrystyles god damn i’m lucky
↳yourinstagram all for you babe 🫶🏻
randomperson weren’t harry and y/n literally just fighting in a club like a week ago?
↳randomperson they literally break up every other week it’s nothing new
↳yourinstagram hey it’s more like every other month get it right
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liked by yourinstagram, niallhoran and 573,829 others
harrystyles got the hottest girl on this boat in my lap.
view all 3,627 comments
niallhoran hey man…I’m on the boat too
↳harrystyles hence why I said “girl”
randomperson they’re so cute when they’re actually being happy together
yourinstagram 🫡
thesun how long y’all think this is gonna last?
↳harrystyles a week tops, she’s mental mate
↳yourinstagram you’re sleeping outside tonight
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liked by harrystyles, randomperson and 473,729 others
yourinstagram better than ever
view all 3,629 comments
randomperson need their life fr, born into money and they just get to party
↳yourinstagram hey! we also brunch and shop don’t minimize our contributions to society
harrystyles hey pretty lady
↳ yourinstagram come over?
randomperson she’s so hot he doesn’t deserve her I heard he was fucking around with some model on the side 😗
↳randomperson pretty sure I saw him kissing said model the other night….
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liked by randomperson, randomperson and 45,395 others
deuxmoi I have confirmed this with multiple sources, sounds like they’re officially broken up…again.
view all 2,628 comments
randomperson I could see them ending from a mile away
randomperson my man threw away a 10 and for what?
randomperson they’ll literally be back together in like 2 weeks
↳randomperson idk I saw y/n in a club on Friday with said NBA player and they seemed relatively serious the PDA was crazy
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liked by randomperson, randomperson and 13,739 others
thesun Fun in the sun for Harry Styles who recently cheated on his on again off again girlfriend y/n was seen in Turks and Caico’s getting rather snuggly with the model he cheated on her with. Could this truly be the end for the socialite couple?
view all 1,628 comments
randomperson my man has no shame but tbh…i get it
randomperson imagine cheating on your gf and then just flaunting it in public
yourinstagram lol what a joke
↳randomperson oop….you deserve so much better girl
↳yourinstagram and I have it don’t worry 🤭
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liked by randomperson, yourinstagram and 20,728 others
dailymail new couple alert! Socialite y/n was spotted leaving dinner with NBA player Devin Booker following her very messy break-up with fellow socialite Harry Styles. This could get mess people! Buckle up.
view all 3,628 comments
randomperson good for her! never let ‘em see you sweat girl!
randomperson her and harry gotta be #1 most toxic couple rn
↳randomperson you’re right cause we both know they’ll be making out at some club next month like nothing happened
randomperson rich people problems seem like a lot of work
yourinstagram we’re cute 🤷🏻‍♀️
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liked by randomperson, devbook31 and 472,829 others
yourinstagram imagine cheating on me?
view all 4,638 comments
randomperson FUMBLED THE BAG!
randomperson damn she’s too hot for him
devbook31 can’t relate
↳yourinstagram 🫶🏻
harrystyles well damn
↳yourinstagram go away.
Please go read the Magnolia Parks series it’s consumed my life and this is lowkey inspired by that because i love for drama and that book got the most amount of drama I’ve ever read so if you like angst READ IT!!!! enjoy love you say it back
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watchmegetobsessed · 1 year
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BULLETPROOF
A/N: *screams in excitement* its here!!! its finally here!!! im so happy i finally got to finish a longer fic without hitting rockbottom with it. this one was very easy to write, i think i was heavily inspired by the night agent series on netflix lol now im very excited for yall to read it!!
WORD COUNT: 12.5k
WARNING: gun use, getting shot, blood, stalking, bullying
SUMMARY: Being Eroda's first daughter is not all sunshine and rainbows. It's tough out there when people are so fast to judge you and turn their back on you. But there is one person who's been there for you all along. Your bodyguard, Harry.
MASTERLIST | SUPPORT ME!
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The wine is nice. The salad is tragic, probably the worst you’ve ever had. You wonder how dessert will turn out to be, could be good or poisonous at this point.
The company?
Well, at least he is not staring at your breasts.
Going out with Jaiden sounded a lot more fun when he asked you out in the library, but now that you’ve been listening to him speak for the past thirty-two minutes, you’re counting it, he appears to be just another douche who wants to brag about you at the next frat party. He probably thinks he is doing well and he might get lucky once you leave the restaurant, but there are two reasons why that won’t happen.
One, you spotted some tomato sauce on his left hand before he left to the restroom and when he came back it was still there, he did not wash his hands and then touched the garlic bread. You’ve pushed the basket out of your view discreetly after that. It’s already a very strong point, but the second one is the real deal.
There is absolutely no way the three agents, one by the door, one by the window and one at two tables from you would be okay with assisting to your hookup. Well, it’s not that they would have a choice, if you think of it. But think about it: even if he weren’t a pig, this is how it would go.
Arriving to Jaiden’s building you would be told to wait outside with Morrison, while Jackson and Styles go up and check out Jaiden’s place. Then they would come down to get you. If the mood weren’t dead by this point, you’d have to go up and start the action with one agent down in front of the building, one by the front door and then the worst, you just know Styles would stand by the bedroom door like a statue, listening closely to everything happening inside.
Then when it would be over you’d have to leave with the three men around you and return to your place. Madness. Pure comedy.
“What do you think?”
Jaiden’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts about the ridiculous daydream of tonight and you realize you have no idea what he’s been talking about in the last seven minutes.
“Um, sorry?” you clear your throat, reaching for the wine.
“I was asking you about how…”
You look over his shoulder and spot Styles through the glass door, zoning out of the conversation in record time.
He is wearing civil clothes, all three of the agents are, that was the deal when you’re out somewhere, with friends or on a date which happen once in a leap year, to be honest. He’s wearing a black t-shirt with a black bomber jacket over, simple, dark jeans and trainers. You wonder if this is actually his style, if this is how he dresses when he is not on duty, when he is running errands or meeting up with his friends for drinks. You only see him when he is responsible for protecting you at all cost, he’s been head of your security team for the past two years and it’s been a rollercoaster of a ride.
He was a real pain in the ass at the beginning, he would jump at every possible noise, he dragged you out of class once because someone’s pen clicked louder than the usual. Fuck, you lost count of the times you screamed at him, asking what was his problem, if he lost his mind and every time he just stood there, like a fucking rock and then just nodded at the end and carried on with his nonsense.
It took some time and lots of communication to find balance. You realized he would never listen to you when you’re screaming from the top of your lungs and you had to accept that he is just doing his job. So you sat down with him and your father, the president of Eroda to talk about boundaries.
Things have been better since then and the two of you actually work well together. Most of the times.
He was next to you at every major event, ups and downs, he drove you home after you confronted your last serious boyfriend about how he cheated on you with three different girls, you sobbed like a baby and couldn’t even open the lock on your front door. He took the keys gently from your hand and did it for you. When you woke up in the morning the fridge was stocked with your favorites. You never asked, but you know he did it.
He has attended concerts and parties with you, shadowing you even when you had to get tampons in the middle of the night. You bet he knows what brand and size you use too at this point. As much as he’d gotten on your nerves millions of times… you like the guy. He is straight forward, always speaks his mind if asked, he sees things in a very rational way. He’s ambitious and hard-working and most of all, trustworthy.
He might actually be your best friend.
How tragic, you consider your head of security to be your best friend! This must be the end here…
“You’re really not listening, are you?” Jaiden laughs, but it’s dry, he looks pissed when you look back at him.
“Sorry, it’s been… a long week. And honestly, I kind of lost interest when you started talking about football, since I know nothing about it.”
“Wow, okay, so what were you expecting? Brainstorming about possible ways to stop the climate change?” he scoffs and you actually think about just standing up and leaving.
“No, but on a date you usually talk about things you both like. I guess we have nothing in common, then. So why don’t we—“
“You really know how to make people feel stupid.”
“Excuse me?” Your eyebrows shoot up, this is getting interesting.
“Just because daddy runs the country, doesn’t mean you’re above us all. Don’t have to be such a snob.”
“Oh, it wasn’t even me being a snob,” you retort with a forced smile as you grab your bag from the table and from the corner of your eyes you already see the agents moving. ��It’s been a lovely evening, but I think we’re better as… I would say friends, but it wouldn’t be true. Bye, Jaiden.”
You stand and plan to march past him to meet Morrison and Jackson to head out, but Jaiden is not done, it seems. He jumps to his feet and his hand grabs your upper arm, pulling you back. He barely just opens his mouth when Hell breaks loose.
Morrison is first to get his hands on him, yanking him away from you while Jackson tears his hand off you, then it gets twisted behind him and Styles arrives, smacking your date up against the wall.
The whole restaurant is staring at you and you just want the ground to open beneath you.
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You stop at your front door out of instinct, already knowing they have to sweep through the place before you could enter. Styles stands beside you and waits for Morrison and Jackson to return. When it’s confirmed you walk in, a blank look on your face.
“Have a nice night, guys. Thank you for tonight,” you tell them in a robotic voice. Morrison and Jackson says good night and you hear the door closing, but you know you’re not alone.
Styles stands by the door and you can feel him watching your every move as you put your heels away and take your earrings out.
“Are you gonna give me a lecture about choosing guys more wisely?” you ask, finally facing him. He’s standing with his hands clasped together at the front, his usual pose, but it’s a bit odd without his usual suit.
“No,” he answers shortly and you wait for him to say whatever is on his mind. “Just wanted to ask if you’re alright.”
“My arm is fine, you don’t ha—“
“I wasn’t asking about your arm.”
You stare back at him in silence, everything just dawns on you all at once and your chest feels like burning.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you breathe out, but then a tear rolls down your face.
You see the change in him instantly. His eyes soften as he walks over to you, his gaze frantically searching your face, probably trying to figure out what to do. They don’t tell agents how to deal with young, crying women who feel like they are going to die alone.
“I’m fine, really,” you say again and he pulls out a tissue from his pocket, handing it over to you.
“He was a douche. Don’t take it too seriously.”
“How many disastrous dates have I been on in the past year?” you ask with a shaking voice. He doesn’t answer, just clenches his jaw. “You know damn well that it was my eleventh. You were there at all of them. I can’t help but start to think that something must be wrong with me and not with them.”
“Nothing is wrong with you. They were… weird guys. They were the problem, not you.”
“So then it’s just my taste that’s trash, right?” you let out a bitter laugh, hoping that making fun of yourself would help, but it doesn’t. It never does.
“Finding the right person is hard. You have to give it time.”
“I’m impatient, if you haven’t noticed.”
“I have. The first day I met you.”
There it is.
That teeny tiny smile that barely just curls up the corners of his mouth but it drives you insane. Because it’s so rare, it’s so intimate and every time you see it the urge to kiss it gets harder and harder.
Yes, it’s such a cliché, but you do have a crush on your bodyguard. You fought it, you really did, but one day you had to realize there’s nothing you can do about it. Now you’re just trying to live with it but moments like this make it really hard not to overstep certain boundaries. For one, you really shouldn’t have feelings for someone whose job is to protect your life at all cost. Your father would have a heart attack if he found out you’re hooking up with an agent. And two… he might be nice to you, a real friend, but you feel like there’s no way he would ever feel the same way about you. Hell, sometimes, on your worse days you even question his friendship. What if it’s all just the job for him? To take care of your fragile little soul?
You’re awfully lonely.
“Get some rest, you have an 8 am class in the morning.”
He steps back and the smile is gone just like that.
“Yes sir!” you salute him, to which you just get a bored look before he takes one last look around and walks out to check in with the night shift agents outside your door.
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You’d rather spend this Saturday evening locked up in your bedroom, watching Criminal Minds and eating popcorn, but tonight is one of those occasions where you have to make an official appearance as the president’s daughter.
You’ve definitely woken up on the wrong side of the bed, nothing went as you planned so far and you even had a fight with Styles because he ended your morning run earlier when a group of obnoxious fratboys appeared on the football field next to the running track and they accidentally threw a ball in your way.
You have not talked to him since, haven’t even seen him, but you know for a fact he will be coming with you tonight. He is there at every official event, never missing one.
There’s a soft knock on the front door just when you’ve finished getting dressed. You shuffle over to the door and opening you find yourself facing Styles in his usual suit, a change from the workout clothes he wore in the morning.
Fuck, you want to act grumpy still, but he looks especially good with slightly more tamed than usually and he is freshly shaven.
“Ready to go?” he asks.
“Not yet. Come and help me, please,” you say as you turn around, but you notice he is not following you. “Come on, I won’t bite your head off.”
With a tiny frown he finally moves and follows you into your bedroom where you grab the diamond necklace you want to wear tonight.
“Can you put it on, please?”
He takes the necklace, holding it so gently, you have never seen him handle something with so much care.
Maybe only you.
You turn around and hold your hair up as he reaches around your neck and you bit back a moan when his fingers brush against your collarbone. He fidgets with the clasp for a few moments before taking a step back once it’s done.
“Do you think I can make an early Irish exit tonight?” you ask, stepping into your heels and he offers you a hand that you gladly take to help the process. Once you’re done you head out, Styles following you right behind.
“Don’t think the president would appreciate it.”
“Oh, I know him well, I think I can have a pass from him.”
It’s another event where you feel absolutely useless, you’re just there so your father could show off.
“…And this is my daughter, Y/N. She is studying law!... She is top of her class, yes… Isn’t she a lovely young woman?...”
The smile on your face starts to hurt when you decide to take a break from all the guests that you know nothing about but they all seem to be very familiar with you.
“I’m gonna go out for a bit,” you tell Styles who’s been your shadow all night, three other agents watching your every step as well from different points of the room.
“Let me che—“
“I think there’s no danger out on the balcony, everyone has been thoroughly checked here, I’ll be fine for five minutes.”
You have a staring match for a minute where he weighs in on your words before finally nodding.
“Five minutes,” he says, opening the door for you.
“Start the fucking clock,” you mumble under your breath.
As you stand by the railing, staring out into the night you feel more deflated than ever. Like you’ve lost every ounce of energy and the urge to just scream is quite tempting. This is not the life you dreamed of, but it is what your father always wanted and you sometimes feel like a terrible daughter for being so displeased. You do have privileges others would never get to experience, but you’ve never felt lonelier and more out of place. The way here showed you how shallow your friendships have been, now only have about three people you consider your friend and one is your bodyguard, one is studying in Switzerland and the third is… Wait, there’s no third. That’s it, you have two friends.
You hear Styles stepping closer and you already know what he is about to say.
“I know my time is up, but if you dare to remind me, I’m pushing you off this balcony.”
Turning around you face him, ready to fight him for some more time, but you’re surprised to see him with that tiny smile on his face.
“You’re really moody today,” he states, but it’s not one of those smartass comments he usually makes, he is teasing you.
“Surprising?”
“A little bit. Are you… Are you still upset about your date?” His face turns serious.
“I was never upset about the date specifically. I was upset because… Whatever, it doesn’t matter.”
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
“Stop being so fucking polite,” you groan.
“I can’t be rude to you, I would lose my job.”
“You’ve been rude to me on several occasions! Especially at the beginning!” you accuse him.
“I was never rude. I was honest.”
“Jesus, you are so annoying,” you roll your eyes that earns a smirk from him.
“That’s not my job, but I tend to be that often.”
“I might be moody, but you’re awfully cheeky tonight. What’s gotten into you?”
You head back inside, Styles following you.
“Don’t know, guess I’m just in a good mood.”
“Alright, then I’ll need a drink to put up with this new side of yours.”
And that’s what you did, but you didn’t stop at one drink. You didn’t plan to, but you successfully got so drunk Styles had to rescue you out of the venue before your father saw you. After all, you did make an Irish exit.
In the car you can tell Harry is not in the same good mood, he looks rather pissed as he drives you back home, constantly checking the mirrors to see if Morrison and Jackson are behind you.
“Aw, did I make your job harder?” you pout, but then start laughing as you look at his hard stare. His profile looks annoyingly beautiful and you just want to draw the slope of his nose with your finger.
“No, but it would have been nice if I didn’t have to bring you out through the back door on my shoulder, because you kept running away.”
You start laughing as he recites what happened just about fifteen minutes ago when he was trying to chase you down to get you into the car and away from anyone that could ruin your father’s political career if they saw his daughter running around drunk.
“Don’t be so pissed, your eyebrows will glue together one day, you pull the together way too much,” you snort out a laugh as you slide lower in your seat.
It’s an hour long drive and of course, you fall asleep soon. When you open your eyes next, you see that you’re already in the garage of your building.
“Come on, you need to get to bed.” Styles opens the car door, but you’re still half drunk and half asleep, so you just mumble something and close your eyes back. “Y/N, you can’t spend the night in the car.”
“Says who?” you breathe out.
For a few seconds nothing happens and you start drifting back to sleep when you feel an arm behind your back and one under your knees. You faintly realize that you’re being carried up to your apartment and when you force yourself to open your eyes, you realize that it’s Styles.
“Mm, is this also in your job description?” you groggily tease him, barely able to keep your eyes open. “Mr. Styles. Harry. Can I… call you that?”
“Call me whatever you want,” he answers and then waits in front of the apartment while it’s checked out. With the last bits of your energy you study his face that’s now dangerously up close. He is carrying you like you weigh nothing, his strong hold keeping you safe.
“Oh, don’t tell me stuff like that,” you chuckle, your eyes closing as you push down a yawn. You hear the agents coming out of your apartment, saying it’s clear before Harry starts walking again and a few moments later you’re laid down on your bed.
“You have to change, Y/N,” he tells you, pulling your heels off your sore feet. Groaning, you sit up and he helps you up to a standing position before turning around to walk out, but you stop him, pulling him back by his hand.
“I can’t get this off alone,” you say, nodding down at your dress. You catch the hesitation in his eyes as he weighs in the situation and steps back at last.
You turn around and move your hair so he can access the zipper. He doesn’t move instantly and you’re almost about to turn around when you finally feel his touch on your back. He places one hand to your shoulder blade, holding the dress in place while he pulls the zipper down with the other.
Slowly.
So slowly, it’s almost like foreplay.
Especially since you have no bra underneath, so the lower he gets the more skin he is able to see. The silky dress loosens around your body and you know he is looking at your bare back. With one hand you keep the dress to your chest, but the other one lets go of your hair as you turn back around to face him. 
The alcohol is working eagerly in your system and you’re feeling blunt and risky as you hold your chin high with a half smirk.
“Where did your cheekiness go, Harry?”
“I’m gonna go now.” He gulps hard as he backs away towards the door, but you follow him.
“Am I that scary? That you’re running away?”
“Y/N, stop.” He looks into your eyes as he finally stops and his green irises appear dangerously dark as he stares back at you.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you shrug innocently as you keep walking towards him until you’re just inches away from his chest. “Have you never thought of me like that?”
He doesn’t answer, but you don’t see disgust on his face and it’s enough for you to keep pushing.
“Because I have. Several times. On nights when I knew you were outside and then other times when I didn’t know where you were but I was hoping you were thinking of me.”
He is still completely silent, though his eyes are throwing fireworks your way when one of the straps of your dress slips down your shoulder.
“I want you and I want you to want me too, Harry,” you whisper as you move even closer, your hand that’s holding your dress pushing to his chest while the other moves up to the base of his neck. His skin is burning and you’re desperate to feel it underneath his crispy dress shirt too. 
But before you could close the gap, he pulls back and it’s like a slap across your face.
“Go to bed, Y/N. You need to sleep.”
“But think about it, you could brag about fucking the president’s daughter, wouldn’t you want that? You’d be the man, Harry.”
Your words are like venom as you look at him, your chest heaving, your heart hammering under your hand. 
“Stop talking before you say something you might regret,” he warns you.
“So you’re not man enough to fuck me? How should I trust you with my life then if you can’t even make me come?” you call after him when he is already out of the bedroom.
He freezes and the words sink in as you stare at the back of his head. You expect him to turn around and lecture you, to tell you how cheap you sounded, but instead he just walks out of the apartment and leaves you to your spiraling, drunk thoughts.
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You realize you never actually knew panic and terror until you wake up the next morning, realizing what you did last night. That you have to face Harry after you almost begged him to fuck you and then said he is not man enough to be your guard because he didn’t have sex with you.
You have an afternoon yoga class on Sunday that you very much consider canceling on just so you don’t have to face Harry, but you can’t hide in your apartment forever, you’d have to meet him again sooner or later. So when it’s time for you to leave and you hear the knock on your door you open it with shaking hands, relief washing over you instantly when you find DeLuca standing in front of you, no trace of Harry.
That means you have some more time to figure out how to deal with the situation you got yourself into. Yoga actually helps you find some peace of mind, but only until you leave and catch on Jackson’s radio before getting into the car, Harry’s voice asking for a report.
He is working and he’ll be at your apartment, meaning that you have to go through the most awkward situation ever in about fifteen minutes. 
It all happens as if you were in a movie. Arriving at the garage Jackson opens the door for you, DeLuca rounds the car and right at that moment the doors to the elevator swing open and Harry walks out with two other agents. Your mouth goes dry and you’re getting ready to fake your death, but things take a turn then.
“DeLuca, take her to the second floor, it’s been cleared. Jackson, Morrow, come with us.” Harry instructs the agents and you realize something is wrong.
“What? What’s happening?” 
There’s an apartment on the second floor for the agents, like their own little headquarter and it’s usually the safe place they take you to whenever something looks suspicious. Harry looks at you, worry etched onto his face as he places a hand to your back and leads you over to DeLuca.
“There’s been a security alert while you were away, we need to check the whole building.”
“Alert? What kind?” 
“Someone tried to get into your place,” is all he says before he passes you over to DeLuca and disappears with the other agents.
The time you spend on the second floor feels like forever, but it’s actually only twelve minutes. They sweep through the whole building and check the system, trying to find out what happened, but the cameras only caught a man in a black hoodie who stopped at your door, fidgeted with the lock for a while but couldn’t get in so he left. When it’s safe for you to return to your own place you’re walked back by two agents, but the tension is still thick. 
You hear Harry doubling the agents for the rest of the day and night and he checks your apartment one last time himself again when his phone rings and you know it’s your dad calling from the tone he answers the call.
“Yes, sir. Passing the phone over,” Harry says after the briefing of the situation and then holds the phone out to you.
“Dad?”
“Are you alright?”
“I’m fine, I wasn’t here.”
“Alright. We’ll have some extra agents around you for a while. I know you don’t like the guardedam, but we have to do it until we find out who it was.”
“Okay.”
You talk a little more and then you give the phone back to Harry, because your dad wants to have a few words with him. He listens carefully for a while and then walks out of the apartment, leaving you wondering what else there could be, but your dad could be a little too overprotective, so you’re sure he is just fussing about the situation.
You’ve just finished making yourself a cup of tea when Harry returns. He would never admit it, but you can tell this incident is stressing him out. 
“Everything alright with my dad? He didn’t tell you off or anything, right?”
“No,” he shakes his head. “But you won’t like what I’m going to say. You need to have an agent in here with you until we get to the bottom of this situation.”
“Will it be you?” The question rolls off your tongue before you could even think about it. 
“If you want me, yes.”
“I feel the safest with you.”
It’s the truth. Even though the things you told him, screamed at him, don’t agree, he is still the one you trust the most around here to have in your apartment with you.
“Okay,” he nods. “I have to talk to the team, so–”
“Wait!” you stop him from leaving, knowing well you need to have this conversation. Swallowing hard you leave the tea on the kitchen counter and round the island to get closer to him, but still keep some distance. “I want to… I want to apologize for last night. My behavior was… Unforgivable.”
“No need to apologize.”
“Don’t bullshit me,” you give him a hard look. “I had too much to drink, I didn’t… I wasn’t thinking. So… I’m sorry.”
He stares back at you for seconds that feel like forever before he finally nods and you know it’s not just a meaningless reaction to get you out of his hair.
“Okay.”
“We’re… we’re good?”
“Yes. But I really need to go now.”
“Alright,” you clear your throat as you watch him walk towards the door, but he turns back one last time. “I’ll be back soon.”
“Okay.”
And with that, he is off to do his job.
You spend the rest of Sunday studying and you get so focused on your textbooks and notes that you totally forget about Harry’s return and you don’t even notice it. So when you wander out of your bedroom after your brain has been fried from everything you studied, you almost scream when you see Harry standing in the living room by the window.
“Holy shit!” you snap a hand to your chest to calm your racing heart.
“What happened?” He moves fast like a cat, instantly checking the room for possible dangers.
“Nothing happened, I just… forgot you’d be here,” you admit with a soft chuckle as you head out to the kitchen. “It’s kind of creepy how you’re just standing there.”
“I can see the street from here as well,” he answers, as if it was such an obvious thing to say.
As you move around the kitchen, heating some leftovers up you catch him looking at you, or to be more precise, your legs that are almost completely bare thanks to the cotton shorts you’re wearing. 
Last night was a disaster, but now that the shame has settled in you, something else has been lingering in the back of your mind. The sense of hesitation you experienced when you were trying to seduce him embarrassing yourself has been on your mind. How he didn’t move away instantly, how it looked like he was fighting himself, so it gives you the idea that a tiny part of him does look at you the same way you look at him. 
The way he is looking you up is another boost to the theory. 
“Any news about the intruder?” you casually ask, ignoring his stare that quickly slips away from you when you speak up.
“Not yet. But we’re working on it.”
“Do you think… it’s something serious? Like someone is after me?” Leaning onto the kitchen island you play with the spoon in your hand as you look at him, waiting for his response.
“I wouldn’t go into guessing. I’m more of a–”
“Of a fan of factual planning, I know,” you finish his sentence with a smile. You’ve heard it from him several times, word by word.
Grabbing the bowl you round the island and stop a few feet away from him.
“I really do trust you, Harry. With my life.”
You feel like you had to let him know again after last night. The way you questioned his ability to protect you was not fair, he gave you no reason to believe he is not the best person for the job. There’s a reason why he is head of the team.
“Thank you,” is all he says. He is back to his distant self that only focuses on work. You know in times like this it’s better to play by the rules and retreat.
“I’m gonna head to bed soon. Good night, Harry.”
“Good night, Y/N.”
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Everything falls back to a somewhat normal routine. Following the incident your team almost doubles, but nothing actually happens and the building’s security system gets an update so three weeks later you’re back to your usual with only slight changes. 
Like how there’s an agent in your living room during the night.
There was a discussion about positioning someone inside your apartment and they explained to you why it’s better to have someone with you during the night. You understood and agreed to do it under one condition: you have to approve of the agents that can take the position. There are three of them and of course, Harry is in that team.
He’s been taking up the inside position as much as he can. He never asked you, but maybe he figured you know him the best and feel the most comfortable with him inside.
Most of the time he hangs out in the living room. He doesn’t stand by the window all the time, you’ve caught him sitting in the armchair, walking around, stretching his limbs. To make it less miserable for him you spend a lot of time in front of the TV, mostly to hopefully entertain him at least a bit now that he’s stuck with you more than ever. For days, he didn’t even look at the screen, but lately you’ve caught him following the show several times, so you’re religiously keeping this habit up. 
The awkwardness has faded, but it definitely taught you a lesson. You better not get drunk when Harry is around and that’s like… all the time. 
Everything seems to be back to it’s extraordinary normal that you’ve been used to for the past few years. 
Today is a special day, however. You’ve been part of a case study competition, your criminal law professor suggested you enter and you’ve worked insanely hard on your case for the past three months that earned you first place. They are holding a little award ceremony today and it will finally be your moment. You will be in the spotlight because of something you worked hard for and not because your father is the leader of the country. 
He promised to be there and watch you accept your well-deserved award and you’re excited to make him proud. 
You started the day early and channeled your excitement into a long morning run before spending the noon at a salon to get your hair and nails done for the occasion. You might be the president’s daughter, but you’re a woman after all and you love a good pampering before an event. 
Now you’re sitting in you closet, trying to figure out what to wear, all the outfits you’ve tried on but decided against are lying on the floor around you in piles. You start to think you should have gone shopping, but then you find the perfect dress, a simple, but elegant black dress with a deeper back cut. You pair them with a pair of designer heels and some statement earrings to bring some light into this quite dark set and you’re all done. 
When you walk out of the bedroom Harry is standing by the window in his usual black suit white shirt attire. His eyes snap over to you and this time he can’t hide how he checks you out from head to toe. You can feel the heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks and ears.
“What do you think?” you ask, giving him a twirl.
“You look… very professional,” he answers. It’s not what you expected, but you know he meant it in the best possible way.
“Has my dad’s plane landed?”
“I haven’t gotten any news from his team yet, but I’m sure he’ll be there on time. Shall we leave?”
“Yeah,” you nod, feeling out of breath. An unsettling feeling sinks into your gut, but you brush it off as Harry helps you put on your coat and you leave the apartment in the ring of agents.
Because of your attendance, the event’s security has been obviously raised and a group of agents have been at the venue long before your arrival, checking every corner so when you’re finally there you can walk in without having to wait in the car. 
The competition had several different fields so there will be more students awarded today, the room is full of winners, their proud professors and parents as well. You take your assigned seat and nervously look around, searching for any sign of your father, but there’s none, so you’re left with just waiting.
It’s killing you, so you text him but you get no response. He should have landed by now to make it in time, his silence is raising concern in you now.
“Harry? Can you please reach my father’s security team?” you ask and nodding he takes a few steps back as he pulls his phone out of his pocket. 
Something is off, you can feel it in your guts and you fucking hate it. It takes forever for Harry to turn back to you, right when everyone starts clapping, because the dean has entered the stage to start the ceremony, but you’re only looking at Harry.
“What did they say?”
“Y/N, he is… He is not coming.”
“What?” It feels like a punch in your stomach and you wish Harry would say it’s just a joke, that he is about to walk in any moment, but the look on his face tells you it’s the truth.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” you whisper as you turn back to face the stage, your throat closing up while you fight your tears.
It was the first thing you asked from him in so long. You’ve been there for him every step of the way and today you just needed your father to be here and be proud of you, but he ditched you. There’s been an ongoing joke on the internet that it will always be the country before you for your dad and you even laughed about it before, but now it’s your cruel reality.
You watch the winners get called on the stage one by one and the willingness to do the same dies in you with every passing moment. 
“Y/N?” Harry taps your shoulder and you snap out of your thoughts only to realize your name has been called. 
“Fuck,” you mumble as you stand from your seat, three agents moving with you, taking their places as you walk up to the stage and shake hands with the dean. Every first place winner has said a few words, so now it’s your turn at the microphone, but it’s like you’ve forgotten how to talk. Looking around you see the sea of faces, everyone is waiting for you to finally say something. Your eyes land on Harry and he gives you a tiny nod and somehow you find your voice.
You manage to say a few sentences about the importance of your study and thank the school for the opportunity before you walk off the stage. You’re expected to return to your seat, but instead, you’re heading to the restroom.
The dam breaks and tears start rolling down your face. You completely ignore the protocol, that an agent has to check the room before you enter and a hand pulls you back before you could rush into the ladies room.
“Y/N, I need to–”
“I don’t want to have the fucking toilet checked, I want to have some fucking privacy!” you snap at him, tears rolling down your face and you’re very close to start sobbing like a child. Harry looks back at you with shock on his face, this time he can’t even mask it, probably because he has never seen you like this.
“Okay, but–”
You don’t wait for him to finish, just push your way inside and don’t stop until you reach a sink that you can lean onto, the sobs finally erupting from your chest. 
Betrayal, disappointment and helplessness wash over you, pulling you right into a possible emotional breakdown, though you’re still fighting it as you open the tap and splash some cold water into your face.
You didn’t realize Harry followed you inside, so when you feel a hand on your back you almost get a heart attack.
“Hey, it’s just me, it’s okay,” Harry holds his palms up when you jump back, gasping for air because of the panic and crying at the same time.
“I s-said I-I wanted p-privacy!” you sob shaking your head.
“I can’t just let you walk in here alone when you can barely breathe!”
“I don’t want to do this! I don’t fucking want to do this!” you cry, leaning your back against the cold, tiled wall as you let yourself fall apart for the first time in forever. You’ve been trying to be calm and collected as much as possible, but so much has piled up on you that your father not showing up was the last straw, the cherry on top.
“Y/N, calm down, take a deep breath, okay?” Harry tries to calm you down, but you just keep shaking your head and sobbing. 
“He didn’t come! It was the only thing… I asked from him!”
“I’m sure he has a reason to–”
“I don’t fucking care! He doesn’t care about me! No one fucking does! I’m just… I have no one left! No one!”
“Don’t say that, Y/N. There are people who care about you.”
“Who? Who cares about me!” you scream at him, finally looking into his eyes and his gaze pierces into yours as he answers.
“Me. I care about you.”
“It’s your fucking job to protect me, it’s not the same!”
Your chest is heaving and you must look like a complete mess, but at this moment nothing really matters. Harry looks back at you like you just seriously hurt his feelings, like what you said was just as disappointing as your father not showing up. Long moments pass by without him saying anything and you start to think he’ll just walk out like he did that night you got drunk, but then he steps closer, definitely crossing the line of comfortable distance.
“If you think you’re just a job to me, you couldn’t be more wrong.”
“Don’t lie to me,” you beg in a whisper.
“Don’t call me a fucking liar,” he snaps back and it’s the first time you hear him swear. His pupils have swallowed his irises and his breathing is almost as wild as yours as he stares at you, practically burning a hole into your face. 
“You left me that night. Without a word. I told you I wanted you and you walked out. That does give me a certain message.”
“You were drunk out of your mind, telling me to fuck you. I would have never forgiven myself if I touched you. I had no reason to believe you wouldn’t regret it in the morning and ask to never see me again. That would have been the end of my career and the end of… me.”
Though your cheeks are still soaked from your tears, his words have stopped your crying and now you can’t even tell what you’re feeling. You have no idea what to do or say, how to react and you can’t believe how this situation is turning out to be. 
“I still want you the same,” you whisper, your mouth deciding on what to say because your brain is in complete shock. 
Harry exhales sharply through his nose, his eyes fall closed and you can tell he is fighting himself, so you want to push him over the edge. Reaching up you cup his cheek in your hand, he doesn’t move at first, but then he leans into your touch and that’s when you push yourself away from the wall to get closer to him, but he pulls away.
There’s a second of devastation, but when he reaches to his earpiece you realize someone is talking to him.
“Copy. We’re in the restroom, give me the fastest route out.” He talks into his wrist before his eyes snap up to you.
“What happened?” you breathe out, feeling like your heart cannot take another shock at this moment, but you’ll have to deal with it anyway. He listens to the answer they give him through his com before talking to you.
“We need to get out. The guy who was at your apartment was spotted in the building.”
“What? Is he armed?” Harry takes your hand in his firm hold and gently, but confidently pulls you towards the door. 
“We don’t know, he ran away, DeLuca and Jackson are after him, but we need to get you out of here.”
Your pulse is higher than ever, you feel dizzy and your brain is definitely shutting down, too much has happened in just minutes, you’re on survival mode. Harry must have noticed your state, because before he could open the door he turns to you, taking your face in his hands.
“It’s gonna be alright. I’m right here.”
“Okay,” you nod, blindly believing anything he says.
He then opens the door, steps out first to check what’s happening and returns to get you and you’re on your way to flee the building.
Circled by agents you follow Harry through hallways you’ve never been to until you somehow get to a back entrance. Your car is already there, waiting for you and you get in the back, lying down onto the seat, remembering that’s what Harry asked from you the last time you had to be rescued out of somewhere. You catch his face before he shuts the car door and he gives you a small nod. 
You don’t experience much of what goes down at the venue, they take you to a safe spot and you wait there with three agents while the rest of your team is either in the venue or at your apartment, making sure there’s no one there. 
Almost an hour goes by when Harry returns and you look at him, feeling on the edge to finally know something.
“We lost him. Your apartment is cleared, let’s get you home.”
You can tell he is beating himself up for letting the guy slip away and you already know he will put his walls back up.
He does one more check in the apartment himself before letting you inside. 
“We are doubling the security for tonight and then we’ll talk about the changes tomorrow,” he lets you know, following you inside. 
“Okay. Are you gonna stay in here?”
“Most likely,” he nods.
“Are you blaming yourself for tonight?”
He doesn’t answer, but his eyes talk for him. 
“You couldn’t have spotted the guy anyway, you would have been with me either way.” You walk closer to him, but keep some distance, sensing his distress.
“I wasn’t focusing fully,” he hisses through his teeth.
“Nothing happened, you–”
“Y/N,” he stops you from talking. “I’m responsible for your safety. Today I put that responsibility behind my feelings and that cannot happen again.”
“Is this your way of saying… you don’t want me the way I want you?” Now you’re moving closer, you need to reduce the distance between the two of you, it’s like something is pulling you towards him, a force that you’re not strong enough to fight. 
He stares at you for long seconds, taking a deep breath before he speaks up slowly in a calm manner.
“What I want does not matter when your safety is at risk. Let me… Let me do my job, let me do what I have to do to keep you safe. Please.”
It’s like he’s begging you, pleading for you to understand and… let go of him. And as much as you want it all to be different, you can’t go against his will and intentionally hurt him, there’s nothing you can do other than live with the pain. Like you always do.
“Okay,” you whisper and try your best to swallow back your tears, you’ve cried enough today. 
Harry exhales, like he’s relieved you’re not putting up a fight and to your surprise he cradles the back of your head and pulls you closer so he can place a kiss to your forehead. 
“I have to take care of a few things, Morrison will be in here until then, but I’ll be back soon, okay?”
“Yeah,” you nod weakly. His hand falls from the back of your head and you watch him turn around and walk out of the apartment. 
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You’re on autopilot. Have been for weeks.
Following the award ceremony things turned upside down once again. On one hand everyone has been on edge, because they couldn’t track the guy down, so your security has been doubled since then. Agents follow you everywhere, making it impossible to have a normal human interaction, not that you had plenty of friends to hang out with before. But still.
Your dad called that night and gave you some grand story about why he couldn’t make it to the ceremony, you told him it was fine, because you had no energy to lash out on him and you haven’t had a decent conversation with him since then. You can’t say it bothers you, it’s like there was a switch inside you that now allows you to give zero fucks about what your father does. You’ve canceled two events you were supposed to attend by his side, using the mystery intruder as an excuse, saying that you don’t feel safe out in public. You could tell he was annoyed, but didn’t question it. 
And then there is the Harry situation. Or the lack of it, if you’d like. It’s been hurting like hell, but there’s nothing you can do other than keep your promise of letting go of him. It’s just really hard when you spend so much time with him and have him in your apartment almost every night. 
You don’t watch TV anymore. You can’t bear being in the same room with him with no one else around. It’s hard enough to know he is on the other side of your bedroom door. You go back to coexisting, you silently follow his orders and not give him a headache when you know he already has a lot on his plate, he does his job in peace and everyone is happy.
Or not, but it doesn’t matter. 
The school semester is nearing its end and you’re already planning to ask to stay here for the summer. You know your dad will flip, but you’ll at least try to make a deal with him to attend events in the summer if it means you don’t have to move back home that doesn’t even feel home anymore. 
With your finals coming up you spend most of your time in the library. Surrounded by heavy books, hundreds of pages of notes, you’re working your ass off, because this is the only thing that could make you forget about your misery for a while. 
It’s a Friday afternoon, almost evening and you’re still very much working on a paper in the almost entirely empty library. It’s a great time, because most students avoid the building on Fridays, more interested in parties than books, so it’s a lot more peaceful. It’s your way of distraction from the fact that you have to make an appearance tomorrow for your dad and you can’t bail out of it this time. 
There are three agents near you and two more at the entrance, but Harry is not working now. He will probably take another night shift, not that you keep track of when he works…
You’re too focused to notice the group of people that come in, but when you spot a figure approaching you and the agents around you move instantly, you finally lift your head up from the book in front of you. You’re surprised to see Jaiden coming in your way, stopped by the agents.
“Jaiden?”
“Um, I just want to talk to her,” he says to the agents and you nod your head to let him through. 
“What are you doing here?”
“Just wanted to give you something, thought you might be interested,” he shrugs as he passes you over a paper and with that he is already on his way, leaving you puzzled.
It’s a QR code so you grab your phone and read it and a website starts loading on your screen. When it finally loads, you feel all the blood rushing out of your head.
It’s a site basically dedicated to you, where people can send in anonymous comments and stories about you for everyone to read them. There are quite a few, a big chunk of them obviously from guys you’ve gone on dates with, dragging you through mud, a lot of them stating things that never even happened. 
You just scroll and keep reading them in total disbelief and then you hear laughter. You look up and see Jaiden with a group of fratboys, having a blast seeing you go through the site before they hoard out of the library. 
Your head is spinning and you feel like throwing up as you pack up your stuff as quickly as possible. It’s a struggle not to start sobbing on your way home, neither of the agents ask what’s wrong, because they are not your friend, they are there to keep you safe, but not from assholes, apparently. When you arrive to your apartment you see Harry already waiting by the door, but you avoid looking him in the eyes as you rush inside, wanting to lock yourself up in your room preferably forever. 
The tears start rolling down your cheeks when you hear someone coming after you and you know it’s Harry. 
“Y/N, is everything alright?”
“I’m fine,” you tell him, keeping your back facing him so he can’t see your face.
“Then look at me, please.”
You don’t move, just stand there, silently crying and there’s no way of fooling him, he knows you better than anyone and your shoulders are shaking as well. Slowly, you turn around for him to see your face.
“What happened?” he asks, stepping closer, but he still keeps some distance between the two of you.
“Nothing, I said I’m fine.”
“You’re obviously not fine, Y/N, don’t… don’t bullshit me, okay? Tell me what happened!”
He won’t give up, he won’t leave you alone until you say something so you pull your phone out of your pocket, open the website and hand it over to you. You watch him scroll for a minute before he looks up at you.
“We’re taking this down and we’ll find whoever did this,” he firmly says and before you could react he is already giving orders through his com. “They are on it. we’ll find them, don’t worry.” “Okay,” you breathe out and you turn around to lock yourself up in your bedroom, but he stops you.
“Y/N, wait!”
You look back at him, not even trying to mask how tired, defeated and hopeless you’re feeling. You must look like just a shadow of the person you used to be and the sight of you is probably just as depressing as you feel because it breaks the professional boundary that’s been between you and Harry.
He moves across the room and pulls you into his arms and you just start crying and sobbing uncontrollably while he holds you tight, gently rocking you from side to side to soothe you. 
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” he murmurs into your hair and you just bury your face deeper into his neck, probably totally ruining his shirt, but neither of you cares about that right now. 
“I don’t want to do this anymore,” you sob, melting into his embrace, because it feels like the only safe place for you.
“I know. I wish I could help you. Tell me what I can do for you.”
“Just please don’t leave me, not tonight, please!” you beg and fully expect him to pull the wall back up, but instead he just holds you even tighter.
“I would never leave you, Y/N.”
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The amount of times you had to fake laugh tonight is ridiculously over the roof. It’s another evening where you’re just a tool, something your father can brag about but you hold no influence or whatsoever. 
You’re sipping on some champagne, but you’re careful with the alcohol consumption this time. Though you’re not sure how another situation like that last time would turn out now. Especially after that night after the website fiasco.
After soaking his shirt with your tears the two of you sat on the couch, you remained in Harry’s embrace and he talked you through it, until you momentarily forgot about what happened and somehow you ended up falling asleep. When you woke up you had a blanket over you and Harry was standing in his usual spot by the window, like a hound, watching out for danger. When he realized you woke up he walked you into your bedroom, tucked you in and sat beside you until you wófell back asleep. 
The website was down by the morning and the school was informed about it as well, taking matters into their hands to punish those who created it. You didn’t want to know the names, you just wanted to forget about the whole thing. 
That night changed things between you and Harry. You didn’t feel that wall between the two of you though there was still some distance, but it felt like you could overstep it easily. It’s like you’ve been dancing on a fence, still not sure which side you want to land on. You’re not planning to pressure him to choose, having him this close is already more than you had before so you’re happy to prolong it for as long as possible. 
You have no idea where the conversation is heading around you, you’ve zoned out of it long minutes ago. It’s not that you don’t understand what politicians, influential people tend to talk about at events like this. It’s more about how you recognize some of them know nothing about the field they work at and still hold the power. 
And you lost interest too. 
Holding your champagne flute your eyes wander over the room until they settle on Harry. He is by the window, what a shocker, examining the sea of guests around you, watching out like a hawk until his gaze meets yours and his expression softens. 
“Bored,” you mouth to him and you catch the smirk he tries hard to cover up.
“You got this,” he mouths back to which you frown, making him laugh.
His laugh.
You’ve been gifted with it more in the past few days than in the time you’ve known him and it’s definitely one of your favorite things in the entire world.
“Break?” you mouth once again and he just nods, moving instantly. 
Five minutes later you’re out on the balcony with him, two guards standing by the door inside. 
“This should be considered torture,” you sigh.
“Don’t be so dramatic,” he teases you.
“I’m not, I hate it here. Look around.” You stand beside him, staring inside at the sea of guests. “What am I doing here?”
“Supporting your dad.”
“I think he is fine without me,” you shrug, nodding towards him, he is standing in a circle of men, all of them pretending to be having a marvelous time, but you know for a fact at least two of those men would backstab him the first given chance. It’s all so pretentious and you’re tired of trying to be part of it for him.
“What would you like to do?” Harry asks.
“What do you mean?”
“If you could do anything, any job, anywhere, what would it be?”
You’ve never really thought of that before. A life that’s entirely what you want it to be is so far out of your reach that you never let yourself daydream about it. So now you take some time to think it through before sharing it with Harry.
“I would probably have a riding school,” is what you tell him at last. He looks at you surprised.
“Like… horses?”
“Yeah,” you smile softly, keeping your eyes ahead, staring at the people inside. “I used to ride a lot when I was smaller and I loved it a lot.”
“But you never do it anymore, why?”
“I wasn’t exceptional in it, never won any competitions so my dad thought I shouldn’t keep doing it. He talked me into quitting and I started learning French instead.”
“You speak French?” he asks in shock.
“No,” you chuckle, finally looking at him. “I was mad at him for making me quit horse riding so I never put any effort into my French classes, I can barely introduce myself.”
“Wow, such a rebel,” he chuckles quietly.
“What about you?”
“I don’t speak French.”
“I know that,” you roll your eyes. “I meant, what would you want to do if you could do anything?”
He curls his lips into his mouth as he thinks about it, his eyebrows furrowed.
“I think I would be living on a farm.”
“A farm?”
“Yeah. You know, growing stuff and keeping animals. I love the thought of growing everything I need.”
“That sounds lovely,” you smile at him. “I hope you get to do that one day.”
“I do too,” he nods and the two of you just stand there, watching the mingling and dancing guests.
It’s a moment you want to last longer, you feel close to him, like you’ve finally jumped off that fence and you’re running away. Together. 
So at last you decide to give him a little push.
“I wish we could be dancing there too.” 
Your voice is quiet, barely audible through the noises coming from inside and when he doesn’t say anything for a while you start to think he didn’t even hear it, or that he is ignoring your words because he doesn’t want to deal with them.
But then his hand gently takes yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. 
“I would… love that.”
Your chest feels like bursting and you wish you could just jump into his arms, but you know you can’t. So instead, you just stand there, enjoying this tiny, hidden moment that’s burning into your memories forever.
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It was hard to focus on your conversations before, but now, after you’ve shared that special moment with Harry it’s kind of impossible.
You’re making your rounds around, chit-chatting and smiling as pleasantly as possible, but in your mind you’re still out on the balcony, holding hands with Harry.
Talking about him, you haven’t seen him in a little while. You look around, searching for him once again, probably for the millionth time in the past ten minutes, but you see no sign of him.
“Morrison, where’s Styles?” you ask the agent beside you.
“Your father asked to see him, Miss,” he informs you. 
“What? Why?”
“I don’t know, Miss, I’m sorry.”
You try not to think much of it, but when you finally spot him in the crowd your stomach drops, because his expression is anxious and angry at the same time, though he is trying hard to mask it. But you know him too well.
“What’s wrong?” you ask, instantly ignoring the conversation you’ve been in before. 
“Can’t talk right now, but we better leave.”
You don’t question him, just follow, though the way he is acting now is freaking you out. He is right next to you as you make your way out of the room, getting farther and farther from the rest of the guests.
“What happened?” you finally ask when you’re walking down the hallway that leads to the entrance.
“I don’t want to turn you against your father,” he answers, but now you’re just even more keen on knowing what’s going on.
“Harry, tell me!” you demand, stopping abruptly.
Not too willingly, but he comes to a halt as well, turning to face you as he leans closer.
“Your father kept it a secret that they got a letter yesterday in which someone threatened to hurt you today. He kept it from us, because he knew you wouldn’t come tonight if you found out.”
“What?” All the blood rushes out of your face as his words process. 
“He strengthened security for your sake and thought it would be alright, but I don’t want to risk it, we need to get you somewhere safe until we get to the bottom of this whole thing.”
“Okay,” you nod, a shiver running down your spine at just the thought of that letter your father hid from you. 
You’re nearing the exit when your father’s voice beams through the hallway, just when you’re already seeing your car outside.
“Y/N! Where are you going?!” 
He is rushing towards you with his own security team circling him and you can’t stop yourself from rolling your eyes.
“I’m leaving!”
“And you didn’t think of at least saying goodbye?”
“I’m not doing anything for you anymore. Not when you’ve intentionally put me in risk just so you could use me at another event!”
The look he gives Harry says it all. He is pissed that Harry told you about the threat, that someone went against his will.
“It’s not that serious, Honey. We have everything under control.”
“Is that so? Then who sent the letter?”
“We don’t know it yet, but—”
“What if it’s the same guy that’s been stalking me? What if it really is something serious?” You’re finally lashing out on him, something you probably should have done a lot earlier, but you didn’t have the balls. You’re done being the obedient, supportive daughter to a father that’s not returning it at all.
“We doubled security and I have people working on it! No need to–”
“Don’t tell me what I need and don’t need to do! I don’t feel safe anywhere anymore! You knew I would panic if I found out about it but you chose to hide it so you could use me tonight to show people how great of a family we are when in reality, you give no fucks about me!”
“Y/N, that is not true. I didn’t want to stress you out, that’s why I didn’t tell you.”
Lie. That is such a big fucking lie.
“I’m done. I’m done with you. Call me when you’re ready to be my father.”
Turning around you’re on your way out to the car, you hear your dad calling after you, but Harry stops him and it’s the first time you hear him talk so harshly to your father.
And then all hell breaks loose. But it’s not because of Harry’s way of talking to the president.
You’re approaching the car confidently, eager to get away from your dad and the madness that surrounds him, Harry is following you right behind and as you keep your gaze on the car suddenly you realize.
It’s not yours.
Everything happens so fast, but at the same time it’s like it’s in slow motion.
A guy jumps out of the car and points a gun right at you. The agents around you launch forward, but he is several feet away, so they don’t reach him before he pulls the trigger and shoots at you. In that moment you believe you’re about to die. Gasping in surprise you completely freeze, but then get pushed to the side with so much force you smash against the wall, pain jolting through your left arm instantly as the shot of the gun rings in your ear.
You fall to the floor the same time the agents tackle the shooter. From the corner of your eyes you see how your ad is being dragged away from the scene before he could get hurt as well, even though he is shouting your name, it’s protocol to rescue him and take him to a safe place right away.
As you look to your right you see another person on the floor and your heart skips a beat when you realize that it’s Harry, and a pool of blood is underneath you, growing rapidly each second.
He took the shot that was meant for you.
The rest is a blur. You start screaming and try to reach him while two agents pull you up from the floor to take you away from the scene as well, your arm hurts like hell, but you just keep screaming for Harry. 
At last you catch his face, you see him gasping for air, pure panic and fear all over his face, he looks at you one last time and you see a tear rolling down his face before you’re dragged away.
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The constant beeping. It just keeps going and going and it’s driving him crazy. 
Crazy enough to finally open his eyes.
Harry is more than confused about his surroundings, the hospital room looks sterile, but nice, very nice if you ask him, so he knows he is at some kind of private facility. It takes a couple of moments for the pain to set in but when it does, it comes with all the memories as well.
He was shot in his chest when he pushed you out of the way, he remembers the pain he felt then which was a lot worse and more intense than the dull, pressure like feeling in his chest right now. He remembers lying on the floor and looking at you as two agents pulled you away and he knows he said his goodbye in that moment, because he was convinced he would die.
He didn’t. 
Now he is lying in a hospital bed, the machines hooked onto him keep beeping and tracking his vitals and when he turns his head slightly to the left the beeping intensifies because he sees you sleeping in an armchair next to his bed. 
You look awfully uncomfortable, but still breathtakingly beautiful, your left arm is in a cast and you’re cradling it to your chest. As if you could sense his wandering gaze, you start moving around and you blink your eyes open at last, seeing that Harry is finally awake.
“Hey,” he breathes out, barely finding the energy to speak, but you burst into tears right away as you fall forward, one hand coming to the side of his head, the other one holding his hand on the mattress.
“You’re awake, oh my God, I really thought I lost you!” You sob and try to take in the sight of him conscious and talking, something you didn’t think you’d ever see again when you saw him lying on the floor three days ago.
“I’m okay, I’m right here,” he exhales as his other hand comes to take your hand by his face. “How are you? Are you okay?”
“Harry, you were literally shot and you’re asking if I’m okay?” you laugh through your tears, finally cracking a smile from him as well. 
“That doesn’t mean I’m not worried about you.”
“I’m fine, just broke my hand, but it’s okay. How are you feeling? Does it hurt?”
“Kind of. But it’s not that bad.”
“Not that bad? The bullet missed your heart by one millimeter. Doctors said it’s a miracle you survived.”
“Well, at least I know I’m not bulletproof,” he tries to joke and it makes you laugh and that was his only intention. 
You’ve stopped crying, but you wouldn’t move from beside him. You’ve been in this room since they brought him out of surgery and refused to leave since then. He reaches over and wipes your tears off your cheeks before cradling your face in his palm. You gladly lean into his touch and then turn your head to kiss into his hand without hesitation. 
You fill him in on what happened. Tell him about how he was rushed to hospital and the guy was caught and it was confirmed he sent the letter and he was the one stalking you at your apartment and award ceremony as well. You were afraid it was someone you knew, but apparently he was just some psycho who wanted to hurt your dad by hurting you.
It was a wakeup call to your father. One that he desperately needed after the stunts he has pulled lately, so you had a long talk outside of Harry’s room when he found out you were here with him. He apologized for everything and promised to be better. You told him his words mean nothing, you need to see the change in his actions. 
He has visited every day since then and you discussed the future as well. A future that will bring lots of change.
“You saved my life,” you quietly say, still kind of in shock about what happened.
“I would do it again,” he replies. 
“You won’t be able to work again because of it,” you tell him. The bullet grazed his lung as well and the doctors said he might never be able to reach the same physical limits like before.
“It doesn’t matter,” he shakes his head. “I didn’t lose you and that’s what matters.”
His words sink in and you have to fight your tears again as you rest you lean closer, until your faces are just inches away.
“I don’t want to feel again the way I did when I thought you died. I don’t want to keep my distance, I… I love you and I want to be with you.”
Harry exhales heavily, his eyes fall closed and when they open again you get lost in them.
“I love you too. And I want to be with you too, always have.”
You let out a laugh that’s mixed with relief, happiness, pain and so much anticipation before you push closer and finally press your lips to his.
Years of built up tension and passion is set free as you kiss him and he returns it just as eagerly. It’s not at all how you imagined your first kiss, not with a cast on your arm or Harry lying in a hospital bed after being shot, but none of it matters in this moment, only him. There’s no more playing around, pushing each other away, this is end game and you both know it. 
“So…” you mumble against his lips, “Will you move to a farm with me?”
“Moving? Aren’t we rushing a little ahead?” he chuckles, brushing some loose strands of hair out of your face before pecking your lips shortly.
“No. I don’t want to waste any more time. Let’s do what we always wanted to do.”
“What about your life? Your dad?”
“I already told him I’m stepping back from my first daughter duties. He is okay with it.”
“Really?”
“I mean, he doesn’t have much saying in what I do after almost getting me killed,” you joke, though you both know how serious the matter was.
“And you’re sure you want to move on… with me?”
You smile at him softly, it’s so typical he is questioning your decision even after everything that happened. He surely needs some time to adjust to this new version of you and him where there’s no wall between the two of you, just love.
Leaning down you kiss his lips softly.
“There’s no one else I would do it with, Harry.”
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!
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1d1195 · 11 months
Text
Traditional III
I think this is a little bit of a slow start for this series, and I apologize for that, I'm still kinda setting up some background pieces. I got a few big plans ahead here. I hope you like it. You can find the first two parts here: Traditional
Warnings: slight 18+ topics mentioned (like you have to squint to see them)
“Do...you expect...more from me?” She asked quietly. She didn’t meet his gaze as she asked. Harry saw the way her cheeks turned pink as she spoke.
"I would love t’do more with you of course. But m’not an animal. M’not going to make you.”
“You kind of pay me to do that though,” she reminded him still not fully looking at him.
"M’not gonna make you do anything you don’t want to. I just want to spoil you.”
Harry was quietly but almost assuredly in love. There were hundreds of reasons not to be. First and foremost, she was his intern. Maybe not his directly...but at his company, nonetheless. There were so many issues with falling in love with someone that was subordinate to him. But here he was. The second reason was of course that he wasn’t supposed to fall in love with someone he was paying money to for the arrangement agreed upon.
But how could he not? She was the most adorable thing he had ever laid eyes on. She was so kind and intelligent. The way her nerves seemed to amplify while she was at dinner with him versus the confidence she exuded when she shook his hand was unbelievably cute. He thought of all the things to be nervous about, it would be working at his company. But apparently, spending the evening with someone who already wanted to be in her presence was the kind of thing to get someone so cutely riled up.
The second he heard her voice say Styles Incorporated he was done for. He wanted it to be her last name—he didn’t care about how ridiculous the sentiment was. Hearing her say his last name sounded so perfect in her voice he practically melted. The moment he saw her in person was like trying to balance himself on a tightrope. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and never let her go. But he was the boss of the company she was interning for, so he had to pretend he was just meeting her. Like he didn’t just scour her interest profile and all social media looking at her cute little being.
Hey beautiful. What are you up to today? Do you want to come over? I make really good Ramen.
Oh, I’d really like that! She answered almost instantly. Harry smiled excitedly at the prospect of seeing the sweet girl in a few minutes. But...I’m building my furniture with Louis and Eleanor :(
Harry frowned. He didn’t want her to build her cheap furniture. He didn’t want her buying cheap furniture. But he wasn’t going to make her return everything she already bought...and he wasn’t going to make her skip out on her friends...as much as he wanted her to. Oh. Don’t you mean you and Eleanor? He remembered what she said good naturedly about her best friend.
No literally, lol. Yes. Me and Eleanor, you’re right. She sent a laughing emoji and Harry wished he could hear her laugh out loud. He loved her light little giggle that he got to enjoy at dinner the other night. He didn’t get to see her today at work, but he wished he did. It was why he was asking her if she wanted to come over now.
While he was reminiscing about her, he missed the three little dots signaling her second reply. We were going to order pizza...if you like pineapple on your pizza you CAN’T come over but if you like GOOD pizza, then you can come and entertain Eleanor and I if you’d like.
He thought her humor was easily one of his favorite qualities about her. Have you tried it love? It’s not that bad.
Here I was, starting to like you...I’m not ordering it.
He chuckled at her response. I won’t make you...I’ll be there in fifteen?
I’ll see you then :)
Harry wasn’t really one to worry about what to wear, but suddenly he had no idea. What do you wear to help your employee, but also love interest, but also companion that he found off the internet to help build cheap furniture? He decided on a pair of dark jeans, a T-shirt, and some trainers he had lying by the door of his home. It occurred to him he was meeting her best friends and he thought that maybe he should have put in a bit more effort. It was only their second time together outside of work. Nonetheless, he was very excited and really looking forward to seeing her in her element.
*
“Louis,” she begged.
“I just want to ask him how many millions he’s worth. I don’t know why that’s an issue.”
She looked at Eleanor pleadingly. “Lou,” she said gently and then smiled kindly.
“Oh alright,” he rolled his eyes. “I’ll behave. But I won’t like it.”
At that moment, her phone signaled she had a visitor waiting in the lobby. She didn’t know if it would be pizza or Harry, so she headed down with her wallet just in case.
As she descended the staircase the one floor, she seemed to have an epiphany that she was wearing a pair of leggings and a t-shirt she would typically wear to the spin class she went to once a year with Eleanor. She realized she was entirely underdressed to see someone as beautiful as Harry. More so someone that she was employed by—in more than one way. She doesn’t know what possessed her to invite Harry over to meet her friends and build furniture. But she did know. She knew because she already liked him so much.
“Wow, thanks, mate,” the man was stuffing the money into his pocket as Harry held the three pizza boxes in his hands. She imagined Harry must have given him a substantial tip. In her head, Harry probably didn’t walk around with any bill smaller than a fifty.
“Oh, Harry. You didn’t have to do that,” she said quickly hurrying over to the pizza guy and Harry. The delivery guy was someone that she had run into several times over the last few years since she loved this pizza place.
“Oh, hey lady,” he smirked at her. “Your boyfriend said he would pay. Figured it wasn’t an issue,” he shrugged. Her cheeks pinked at the word boyfriend directed at Harry and she bit her lip waiting for Harry to answer instead. She waved gently to the man exiting with the large tip and he winked at her over his shoulder. He gave her a thumbs up and she swore she could see him mouth the word upgrade.
“Not a problem, love,” he responded with an easy smile. “Just happened here at the same time.”
With pizza in hand, she awkwardly made her way back to the stairwell trying to calm her nerves. Especially since Louis never had a filter. Harry was professional and lovely. He paid her in more than one way, and he was about to meet her crazy best friends. She worried she was about to lose both sources of income in a matter of minutes. “Y’okay, kitten?” He asked quietly as she approached her door.
“Mhmm...” she hummed. “Nervous.”
He chuckled. “Don’t be,” he said it easily. “M’excited t’meet your friends.” Swallowing, she nodded and pushed the door open.
“How much do we owe you?” Louis called from the living room.
“Um...Harry paid, so you’d have to ask him,” she still sounded nervous as she kicked her flipflops off at the door and made her way through the little entry way.
“S’all set,” Harry said easily. Obviously. It was pizza, and he didn’t mind in the slightest paying for the four of them. He set the pizzas on the counter in the kitchen and turned to her friends spread about empty cardboard boxes and plastic bags. Her couch was pushed against the wall facing the TV and the new stand it sat upon. She had music playing softly in the background that echoed through the room from the TV. Eleanor was focused on the directions in front of her while Louis twirled the little wrench in his hand.
“Thanks, Harry,” Louis said and stood to hold his hand out. “Nice t’meet you. Heard a lot about you,” he smirked.
“Hi Harry,” Eleanor chirped leaving the directions to flutter back to the floor and gave him a hug. “Thanks for coming to help. Louis gets us distracted a lot.”
“Entertained,” he corrected. Harry chuckled.
“Looks like you’ve made a lot of progress,” he noted that the coffee table was also completed in addition to the TV stand.
“Miss Impatient over there couldn’t wait,” Louis said. “El and I are on dresser duty.”
“Shh,” she hushed as she was still putting out paper plates and getting some napkins to put beside the pizza. “The coffee table and TV stand were like three parts total.”
Harry chuckled. “Didn’t take you as impatient, love,” he said softly in her direction.
She ignored his comment. “Can I get you a drink?” She asked as if the conversation around her wasn’t happening.
“Oh, she hides it very well,” Louis told Harry.
“She’s not impatient Louis,” Eleanor rolled her eyes. “She’s independent.”
“Terrible really,” Louis murmured causing Harry to chuckle.
“Water is fine, kitten,” he finally responded as if he wasn’t causing the racing of her heart just by being there.
*
Louis and Eleanor left after two bookshelves, the dresser, and the night table were put together. Louis claimed exhaustion because he was old despite Eleanor and her doing most of the heavy lifting. After a grateful goodbye, she ushered them out the door, Eleanor whispering to call her later in her ear.
In her eyes, it was really starting to look and feel like home. Harry was extremely helpful and wasn’t irritated at all by the lifting or the tedious labor of putting together cheap furniture. Harry was in fact pushing the bookshelves into position. “Y’should really anchor this down,” he told her.
“Er...I don’t want to mess up the walls. They charge you a fortune for that when you move out,” she explained. Harry smirked at her knowingly.
“I’d like t’see them try.”
She snorted and pushed her boxes labeled books toward the shelves. “Sorry, I forgot,” she said. “You’re very...down to earth.”
“Thank you, love. I try t’be.” Harry was reading the titles of the books as he put them on her shelves. He thought you could learn a lot about a person based on what they read. She seemed to read a bit of everything which made sense. She appeared worldly and intelligent. Her choices ranged from psychological non-fiction to romantic novels set at Christmas time. There were several historical fiction books as well. “You read a lot?” He asked.
“I used to...” she shrugged. “I get really caught up in my schoolwork. When I have time in the summer, I can read two to three books a week but that’s only when I’m not stressed about other things.”
“I see.”
“Do you read?”
“Uh...a little here and there...but not too often. I should read more. I get very busy with the company and everything,” he explained.
“I’ve been trying to read for thirty minutes every day since...well...since I was staying with Louis and Eleanor. I turn my phone off and set a timer on the microwave and everything. Louis hated waiting for it to be over so we could watch our shows and stuff.”
“S’nice you have Louis and Eleanor,” Harry remarked. “I don’t know what I’d do without Niall.”
“They’ve been the best people in my life for so long,” she said with so much kindness, so much reverence for them, Harry felt his heart stutter just as a bystander for her love for the pair.
“How did you meet them?”
“Louis was my older brother’s best friend. Since before grade school. They did everything together. He’s like my own brother...and Eleanor has been in his life since they were in high school, she’s like an older sister to me, too.”
“Oh, s’nice. I didn’t know you had a brother.”
There was a pause. If Harry wasn’t so enthralled by her, he might have missed how brief the pause really was. But he watched her swallow as she broke the cardboard box down and set it to the side as she slid the next one in front of her to start placing more books on the shelf. Her eyebrows pinched together just slightly. “He died when I was in high school,” she murmured. “Louis and Eleanor haven’t left me alone since.”
Harry thought of his older sister Gemma. The thought of her dying was enough to break his heart. He was overcome with grief for the poor girl who just casually went on organizing her books. Harry wasn’t sure how she could remain upright. How she could continue living. Gemma was one of his best friends. The way she spoke about Louis and Eleanor with so much admiration...he could only imagine how much love she had for her biological brother. “Jesus,” he muttered under his breath. “M’so sorry, love,” he said quietly.
She nodded, swallowed hard again. She didn’t speak for a few minutes. Harry just let her put her books on the shelf and he silently watched her as it was clear the grief while manageable probably hurt a lot at times like this. Her eyes glistened a bit and she shook her head. “You have a sister, you said?” She asked eventually.
“Yeah, she’s older than me, too. Her name’s Gemma.”
She nodded. “You should call her and tell her you love her,” she said quietly. “Often,” she mumbled.
Harry thought he would cry. “I will,” he promised.
They were quiet for a bit of time until all the books were neatly displayed. She stood up and cracked her neck side to side and put her hands on her hips. “Thank you,” she said finally. He shook his head.
“Not a problem, love.”
He was looking at her like she might break down crying. “Can I ask you something?” She wondered.
“Of course.”
“Do...you expect...more from me?” She asked quietly. She didn’t meet his gaze as she asked. Harry saw the way her cheeks turned pink as she spoke. The change in subject seemed so rapid but Harry didn’t know much about the grief she was feeling. It may have been over five years since it happened, but he imagined that coping with it was something that was still so prominent in her life. He wished he dug deeper into her social media. Wished that he searched her name in obituary searches or asked about her family earlier. It seemed like an entirely vulnerable way to bring it up and now she was stuck with him in her apartment where she probably felt completely exposed.
Hence her question. Taking a deep breath Harry wanted to tell her he would love to make out with her like a horny college frat boy. And yes, he had thought of bending her over this cheap furniture at least ten times since he arrived. But Harry liked to believe he wasn’t like most men on the website he found her on; he would never make her do anything she didn’t want to. He wanted her to be comfortable around him. Especially since he was kind of falling madly in love with her with every passing second. “I don’t expect anything but for you t’be yourself, kitten,” he said softly. “If our...relationship heads that way, m’open to it, of course. You’re beautiful, intelligent, kind, and funny. I would love t’do more with you of course. But m’not an animal. M’not going to make you.”
“You kind of pay me to do that though,” she reminded him still not fully looking at him. Her eyes darted to the pile of flattened cardboard boxes, and he watched the way her fingers kind of shook as she reached for other scraps of plastic and Styrofoam to put in the trash pile.
Tilting his head at her, he reached out and placed a hand over hers, stilling the shakiness and gave her a squeeze. It felt like heaven just to hold her hand. Harry felt so lucky he found her before someone else did. “M’not gonna make you do anything you don’t want to. I just want to spoil you.”
“And help me build cheap furniture that you hate?” She asked with a smirk. She squeezed his hand back and Harry swore he could hear wedding bells in his head.
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t remind me,” he practically groaned. “I would’ve bought you real furniture.”
She grinned so cutely, wrinkling her nose at him. “I bought a real couch and bed.”
“A miracle, it seems,” he grumbled looking at the particle board that seemed to bend a bit with each book she placed on the last shelf.
*
Harry felt he was floating he sat in his office. Spending the evening with her, even just building furniture, furthered how smitten he was with the angel he happened to find on the Internet. Over the last month they hung out several more times, not doing much of anything of importance. Some nights they went out and Harry bought her fancy meals and drinks (and her favorite desserts). Other nights they watched a movie on her comfy, stable couch while Harry wondered if her TV stand was going to fall apart under the weight of her TV.
In the meantime, she didn’t see much of Harry while at work. Most of the time she was in Niall’s office tending to his needs and learning the ins and outs of his job. From what Niall said and what he could see, she was a natural, of course. She was brilliant. “If m’not careful, she might take my job,” Niall chuckled rubbing the back of his head. They were meeting in Harry’s office going over his latest spreadsheet that was so much more organized than the last five years of spreadsheets Niall ever provided. As anticipated, it was all thanks to her.
Harry smirked and rolled his eyes. “You would be so lucky,” he muttered.
“You like this one,” Niall noted. Harry avoided his friend’s eye contact as he looked through the papers on his desk.
Harry nodded. “She’s good,” he shrugged.
“The others were good,” Niall replied, knowingly.
“Are y’snooping as my employee or my friend?” He asked without looking up.
“Best friend,” he qualified.
Harry shrugged again and thought about the pretty girl just down the hall looking adorable and being her perfect self. He hadn’t told Niall yet. But he wanted to. His only hesitation was making her uncomfortable. He didn’t think Niall would say or do anything, but...the idea of betraying her trust or making her feel inadequate at work made him feel like it could be the most horrible thing in the world. “She gets me tea,” he smirked.
“Honestly, I was shocked you gave her company card on the first day,” he chuckled.
Harry felt his eyebrows knit close together. “What?” He said simply.
Niall was seated across from him casually and he glanced at Harry almost curiously. He shrugged. “The coffee and tea?” He asked.
“I thought you gave her a card.”
Niall blinked in surprise. “Uh...no,” he shook his head. “I didn’t give her anything.”
Harry felt irritated. The kind of irritation he felt when she tried to pay for dinner. Or when she bought cheap furniture. Or any time she thought she was inconveniencing him. There was a knock on the other side of Harry’s office at that moment. “Come in,” he called.
“Oh, speak of the angel,” Niall grinned brightly. Harry stared at her, coffee, tea in her hand. Smiling kindly as she entered, she set the tray of drinks on Harry’s desk, and he watched her every movement.
“Talking about me?” She asked quietly. “Doesn’t sound good.”
“All good things, darling,” he promised.
“How do you pay for our coffee?” Harry asked bluntly, quickly, ignoring Niall entirely. He was miffed. In over a month of being here she had probably spent at least a hundred dollars a week of her own money on coffee for the three of them. More, if she went on behalf of other people. Which she was apt to do if anyone asked while in the same room when she asked Niall if he wanted something.
“Harry,” he said quietly. “Stop,” Niall rolled his eyes.
“Uh...I pay for it,” she admitted.
Niall blinked. “You pay for it?” He asked.
“Um...yeah...I thought—”
“Darling, that’s probably cost you a small fortune...s’not sustainable.”
Technically it was Harry buying coffee. But that’s not what he gave her money for.
“Really, it’s okay. I have—”
Harry was already pulling a checkbook out of his top desk drawer. He wrote her name and made it out for a thousand dollars before sliding it to her. She blanched seeing the amount. Oh, she was going to get an earful later. She just knew it. “Let me know if you need more,” he said simply. “Niall, can you please go get her a company card?” Niall stood taking his drink from the tray and headed for the door. He knew when Harry meant business. Literally and figuratively. This was one of those times. He didn’t fully understand why Harry was all up in arms about this, but if he was going to write her a check for coffee, he wasn’t going to question his friend’s reasoning.
“Wait, Niall...,” she said hurriedly. Her cheeks were warming, and her heart rate felt aflutter...like when Harry picked her up from her apartment and held doors open for her. “I...I just set up a tab with the Starbucks across the street. They give us a discount because I go so often. I just tip them and pay at the end of each week...it’s not this much,” she said quickly handing the check back to Harry. A look passed between the two of them and Harry looked away briefly before Niall caught it. He didn’t want him to be suspicious...he would tell him. Niall was his best friend after all. But he couldn’t do it in the workplace. This was a private conversation for sure.
“You set up a tab?” Niall asked. Harry stared at her with so much...annoyance. She could feel his irritation seeping through the air, and she truly thought she was going to lose both her jobs for this. It was just coffee and she had already told Harry she didn’t need as much money as he gave her. Coffee was the least she could do. “Why didn’t we think of that?” Niall directed his question to Harry.
Harry didn’t know either. His agitation disintegrated by the second as he realized she was much more brilliant than he gave her credit for—even for something as simple and lovely as coffee. She didn’t make eye contact with anyone. It made her look like she was in trouble with a school principal. Her fingers fidgeted with the pockets of her skirt and Harry thought about how he wanted to kick Niall out of his office and how much he would love to rip the skirt off her so he could have her all to himself. She was too beautiful, too smart. He was grateful he was seated behind his desk hiding his lower half. “Don’t buy coffee for anyone here with your own money,” Harry told her.
“I’m sorry.”
“Oh stop,” Niall said shaking his head coming back to her. He put a hand on her arm and gave her a gentle squeeze. “‘Thank you, darling.’ Is what Harry meant.”
“Yes. Thank you. Don’t do it again.” Harry didn’t fully understand what was happening to him regarding this perfect girl. Never in his life did he anticipate finding a companion online, spoiling her rotten, and seemingly falling for her at the same time. So much so that he was jealous of Niall. He wanted to yank his best friend’s arm out of its socket solely for touching her arm.
Unfortunately, she saw the way his eyes connected with Niall’s hand on her arm. She was definitely going to get an earful tonight.
--
taglist: @tpwkstiles @matildasatellite @jessitpwk @jerseygirlinca
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alonetimelover · 1 year
Text
M A S T E R L I S T
hello!
welcome to my full masterlist. i hope you'll find something just right for yourself, and maybe you'd like to stay for more.
have a nice time reading,
mila xx
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♡ Fade To Black ~7,3k words
YN loved Joel more than anyone ever. Joel was selfish and scared. They both made mistakes. It all led them to Bill's town and aftermath of what had happened, understanding something very important - love isn't always forever.
♡ ...deserved to experience ~4,3k words (part 2 to fade to black)
YN, Joel, and Ellie try to settle down in Jackson. Over the years, they have navigated their lives through all happy moments. Family expanded, and new feelings and roles were accepted. Joel has never been happier. Or is it just a movie?
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♡ 10 essentials - social media - photographer!reader
Over the years YN did several photoshoots of Andrew for different magazines. When the pandemic began fans started to speculate. Finally, Andrew spills the tea during the '10 essentials' video and let people inside his life - very changed life.
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♡ BRIT awards - slavic!reader ~7,2k words
After years of being together, six months of being engaged - YN and Harry are letting people know they're in love - it just happens to be BRITs 2023 award show.
♡ Easter Monday - slavic(polish)!reader ~1,3k words
Harry and YN spent their first Easter together. He wants to surprise YN with celebrating it the way she does in Poland - but Harry gets his knowledge from the internet, not the best source.
♡ Warsaw show - social media + blurb - slavic(polish)!reader
Harry plays one of the most important shows during the European leg of HSLOT - show where YN's granny is in the audience.
♡ to feel fulfilled - polish!reader ~ 3,6k words
During the day of the last Love on Tour show Harry intends to do three things: satisfy his fiancée, make granny's dream come true and put on the best performance for his fans.
♡ ...marry me? - polish!reader ~ 1,2k words
Harry is drunk and YN is the angel that he dreamt of.
♡ Let's play tennis! - social media - tennis player!reader
Harry's dating WTA no. 1 tennis player - YN YSN.
♡ Can't hear haters when you're slaying - social media - tennis player!reader
Harry and YN (WTA no. 1 tennis player) are still going strong despite all the bullying they receive.
♡ BLURB - YN and Harry go for a run in London - tennis player!reader
♡ My love, we were in Paris - tennis player!reader ~ 1,7k words
Harry surprises YN after her third win in French Open.
♡ Wimbledon - tennis player! reader ~ 0,9k words
YN lost at Wimbledon, but Harry is still proud of her.
♡ Winning - social media - tennis player!reader
In which YN won Wimbledon, people think they broke up and internet breaking.
♡ Daylight - social media - equestrian!reader
For filming Daylight MV, Harry needed some horse riding lessons.
♡ 'The Higgs professor' - social media - physicist!reader
After being sent a video of Dr YN YSN, explaining Higgs mechanism with Harry's music, Harry finds himself infatuated. Then he meets her at Oppenheimer's after party, and the rest is history.
♡ Dispersion - social media - physicist!reader - part 2
NYC is welcoming one of the most famous physicists, and things seem to look great. More physics in pop terms and more of the sweet couple. For some time.
♡ Fired? - social media - physicist!reader - part 3
The leak is hard on everybody, especially YN. Internet wants to fire her from Oxford. And Harry, Harry is like always there for her.
♡ Recommendations - social media - booktuber!reader
The new series on ynrecommends channel on YT caught Harry's attention. After some time, they are joined at the hip. As friends. Right?
♡ If he doesn't have books, don't sleep with him - social media - booktuber!reader - part 2
The rumours are swirling around Harry and YN on whether they are together. In their usual style, they are confusing, so nobody knows. Till, YN posts that one picture on her IG.
♡ Music videos - social media - famous!reader
Harry and YN have been together since 2013. And from the moment Harry started his solo career, YN is there, in the music videos, or behind the scenes. And if it's not her, it's one of their two babies. Soon to be three.
♡ Third baby - social media - famous!reader
Harry and YN have their third baby and some people still don't know how to behave around a breastfeeding person.
♡ Daddy's house - social media - famous!reader
New Pleasing drop comes with new ambassadors - quite little ambassadors.
♡ Love language - boyfriend!Harry
Harry's love language is physical touch, especially kissing you. Here are just a few types of them. !contains suggestive content!
♡ Kisses - boyfriend!Harry
After establishing their love language, YN and Harry are not shy about it. And YN loves smothering Harry in kisses after his first LOT show.
♡ Popstars - social media - popstar!reader
YN and Harry have been together for years. The problem is, even after being spotted kissing, they won't admit it at the beginning. Oh, there also is Judie and Teddy - their cute, little kids.
♡ Goldie - social media - swimmer!reader
Harry follows a competitive swimmer, YN on IG, and (lies you can imagine) it breaks the internet. YN attends his shows and their relationship just grows.
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♡ Happy birthday, rockstar - social media - director!reader
YN's social media posts over the years wishing Joe a happy birthday. (part of an Action! series)
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Harry x (ex)director!reader x Joseph Quinn
A story, where Harry and YN fall in love at Sign Of The Times music video set, challenge their relationship over the years, eventually fall apart and the aftermath of that break-up.
social media:
part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6
written parts:
▪︎ first date ~2,8k words
A short story about two people being nervous on their first date.
▪︎ tolerate it ~3k words
YN sees how much Harry is distancing. Confrontation happens, unfolding cascade of events and feelings YN has buried within herself. Is this the end?
▪︎ champagne problems (part 2 to tolerate it) ~3k words
YN thinks Harry wants to save their relationship after the argument they've had. He thinks that, too. But the definition of saving can differ.
▪︎ heartbreak anniversary ~3,4k words
Harry holds an emotional conversation with his therapist, and then his family. If it wasn't heart-wrenching enough, Anne and Gemma have some news to share - something to tip the scales at the breaking point.
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a/n: headers are made by me. if use, please give credit.
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